#oh and also - not sure how you landed at that production budget but ...no

[cantquitu]

.

[romilly-jay]

Didn't QUITE make the landing (for me): what's that about?

***spoilers***

Last post was about a movie that hinged around a Seeing My Best Friend With Fresh Eyes story arc (and had fun pushing the edges/ expectations for the New Best Friend But He's Gay bonus plotline).

This is also a Finding Her Way Back To Her Best Friend which - *for me, mind!* - started really well and ended pretty well and went wonky at the two thirds mark (but top marks for sticking to the plot logics).

Another similarity? The lead female actor wrote the script. (Okay, for the other movie, it was the lead female actor as co-writer and perhaps this is the kind of thing that benefits from a writing partnership? That call to tread the line between ludicrous and heart-warming. Always a balance. So hard to stay exactly on target.)

Things I particularly liked - that the female MC's business WASN'T failing, at least, not until AFTER she committed to some of the madness of the Chase The Exposure plot - and that she at one point has a moment of realisation: What am I doing? We were okay - why am I risking everything for this mad possible step up??

And, given the kind of movie we're in, it's both inevitable and also pleasing that everything comes round in the end.

Actually, scratch that - really pleasing that this movie serves a HEA without requiring the female lead to give up her Silly Little Notions of self-sufficiency. [Yay for a female writer i.e. a writer who empathises with the female MC's desire to be a rounded, independent person i.e. a writer who has more respect than that for the character!}

The other thing I like is that the male MC is - and remains - a Didn't Make It Yet musician whose main gig is as a wedding singer. She's an ordinary person (admittedly with a Special Gift she's temporarily refusing to listen to, which seems... illogical...) and - so is he. <3 <3

Things that pleased me less - the Big City girl being all like Use Your Gift for me oh but get me THAT guy specifically (i.e. don't use your gift the way it's supposed to be used) and she's like NO PROBLEM.

And - the feeding lines to her Magazine client to help her catch the former best friend / obviously supposed to be HER love interest. NO.

And - they drifted apart. Like, okay, but he's loved you for years. Surely, without some Incident he would at least remember to email?

Re movie production co -

This one actually IS Hallmark - I rarely get to see these due to being Too Mean To Subscribe Directly - but apparently Amazon Prime is more inclined to buy in from Hallmark these days, so *shrug*?

[In the past, most of them seemed to be - Reel One - which, by the way, I didn't hate but were reliably teeny tiny of budget and thus struggling every time they couldn't avoid shooting a "crowd" scene.]

More importantly - look at that MOON. The huge, dreamy, slightly apricot-tinged full moon that's painted into the titles - from the colour (which of course is faked/enhanced as needed) it super reminds me of the way the full moon looks whenever it's rising over the sea and not yet very high above the horizon. Exaggeratedly large and often a fake-looking peach tinge to the disc and the light trail.

I went off idly looking for content about how much poets love writing about the moon (seemed to be a Thing from when I was writing quite a bit of poetry and in the rounds of submitting to online journals).

Didn't really find anything - there was a Too Serious analysis of Walt Whitman on the American Academy poetry site and a subscriber-only Medium essay - and I was genuinely a little surprised that I wasn't INUNDATED by poet moon takes and bad poetry moon jokes.

What I did find, instead, and thought was super cute (if perhaps unlikely to lead to v successful poems??) was the following guide to writing astronomically accurate moon haikus. Thank you, NASA <3.

By contrast, someone who did both astrophysics and poetry extremely well was the physics prodigy Rebecca Elson - who I came to know about originally through The Marginalian and I'm delighted to see that an extract of one of her poems being read, and by Patti Smith no less, is still available on their website - from a 2022 event.

PS lowering the tone but when I was going through some old screengrabs, I found this one, which - I guess - could be positioned as "poet moon obsession critique"??

PPS not a moon poem, rather a moon joke - but a good one IMO:

[wishesunderthestars]

Eunoia // Ch. 12

eunoia (noun): beautiful thinking, the possession of a well-balanced mind, which exhibits goodwill and kindness

Pairings: Hybrid! BTS x reader

Summary: You are a world famous director and you have dedicated your life to your job.You have everything you could ever dream of; wealth, recognition, talent, your friends and family. But loneliness ins’t cured by success. So what happens when you somehow rescue seven hybrids? Can they fill the void?

Genre: Angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, eventual smut

Word Count: 18.1k+

Warnings: Abuse and violence, mentions of past sexual abuse, mentions of putting down hybrids, discussion of insomnia caused by a traumatic event, panic attacks, derogetory language

Masterlist

Chapter 1, Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11

Phew, that was long one. Please comment and reblog it really motivates me to keep writing. And I always love receiving asks so don’t be shy ;)

"I can't believe this is happening! Why can't I receive good news for once?" After the initial shock, you were fuming. "Work of months has been destroyed and for what? Because someone decided not to take the proper safety measures to save some money. People could have been hurt in there! Seriously hurt. And it would have been on our heads!"  

Namjoon was holding your phone, the email you had received opened on the screen. "You didn't know they hadn't taken the necessary precautions. It wouldn't have been on your head."  

"Can you imagine what would have happened if we had been filming? If the actors and the crew were inside and the building collapsed on us?" The chair scraped against the floor as you raised to your feet. You couldn't stay sitting anymore. "I don't even want to think about that. How many people... If we would even get out of there alive. And it isn't only us. What if the earthquake hadn't hit at night? And the workers were still inside? What then? This is wrong on so many levels I can't even begin to count."  

Five point six Richter. That was the magnitude of the earthquake that had hit Virginia. It had been felt in Washington. They said it had affected a radius of two hundred kilometers around the center of the earthquake. No one had expected it and no one had been prepared. In the email there was a detailed description of how the earthquake had caused the sets for The Raven Cycle to collapse in on themselves, because the respective protection measures hadn't been taken. The earthquake had hit at night, waking up everyone in the area and causing panic as people flooded the streets. They had discovered the ruined sets in the morning.  

Protection measures were of utmost important in every environment and you were baffled that a film studio with such prestige would disregard them so easily. You had half a mind to storm into the building you had just returned from and make a scene in front of everyone. They had put everyone in danger, not only the actors and the crew and all the people working there but also the passersby who could have had metal rods falling on their heads.  

How could they allow this? How could they be so careless? It wasn't a building made for only a couple of days of use with light materials. Filming would take place there for the better part of the summer. In a few months you would have been there. You could have been there.  

"And now you have to leave?" Namjoon asked, jaw tense. "Can't you wait a few days and go later?" You knew what he was thinking. You didn't want to leave either. It was the worst time possible for you to leave. The two hybrids in the guestroom, the injuries you had to tend to, Jimin and Jungkook, Jimin's past. But it wasn't your decision to make.  

"I can't, they have already planned the whole trip. It isn't like I have a choice. The message is clear, I will be flying to Virginia in two days. As the director and showrunner, I have to be there. They have called everyone important in the project and I am one of the lucky ones. And it isn't like I can refuse unless I have a very important reason. And I can't exactly tell them I am nursing to health a stray hybrid until he and his friend can live on their own again, instead of reporting them to the hybrid services."  

Namjoon's face scrunched up at the mention of the services. They were anything but kind to hybrids. They thought they could do anything to them if they were strays before they had to give them to a center. The times he and his small pack had to run away from them weren't few. It disgusted you, the way some people behaved.  

You landed back on your chair with a huff, tired of pacing. Namjoon must have got a headache from the way his eyes were following you. "This is just what I didn't need. I thought we wouldn't have to go to Virginia until summer!"  

You felt like banging your head on the wall but you settled for laying you head on the desk. It collided with a dull thud.  

It wasn't only the destroyed set and what that meant for the show. Slowing down of the production, a larger budget needed (oh, the irony) and the bad press you would get if it got out.

People in the area must have suffered. Flashes of collapsed buildings, shattered windows and  cracks in the streets ran through your mind. No, it couldn't be that bad. You prayed it wasn't that bad.  

Namjoon frowned. "What are you supposed to do there? You aren't going to help rebuild the sets. What do they need you for?" You could see the worry in his eyes. His instincts calling him to protect you, to not let you leave. You appreciated the fact he was fighting it.  

With your cheek squished against the desk you said, "No, I'm not going to rebuild the sets, but they need me there nonetheless. There is a legal part of this whole thing I have to be there for. And me being there might help the ones doing the rebuilding."  

Namjoon sighed, giving up on trying to keep you here. "Will John come with you?"  

"Most likely," you said, raising your head from the desk and sitting back on the chair. Your back hurt from the awkward angle you had bent your body in. "I will ask him but I'm pretty sure he will say yes. He always comes with me when I'm working out of California. He has toured half of the world being my bodyguard. And this time.... This time I don't think he would let me go without him."  

 "It seems you do tend to travel a lot," Namjoon noted. There wasn't any judgment or disdain in his voice, he was simply stating a fact. If anything he looked at the cream and gold world globe on your desk with longing. He had told you he had never left California, created and bred in Los Angeles. You didn't like how he said "created" but you couldn't correct him. "It must be nice seeing all those places."  

 The gold of the globe caught the light, distorted figures moving on the polished surface. "It's nice when it's properly planned and when I actually want to go. And there aren't any natural disasters involved. I can't say that's true this time. It's the furthest it could be from the truth." You groaned. "What am I going to do now? I can't leave like this. There are so many things going on."  

 Namjoon was too close to what he looked like talking to you about the ending of the Book Thief. "How long will you be gone?"  

 "A week?" The email didn't specify. A week was how long most work trips that didn't include filming lasted, but this wasn't a normal work trip. This had never happened to you or to anyone you knew before. You had heard of disasters but nothing like this.  

 Your fingers had subconsciously started drumming a tune on the desk. A tune that had comforted you once. A tune he used to hum long before he turned it into a song. You stilled your hand.  

 An earthquake. Five point six Richter. Shaking buildings, rattling shelves, trembling chandeliers, cupboards opening and dishes and glasses falling to the floor. The kind of thing you see on the TV. The kind of thing you don't ever expect to witness. No one expects a disaster like that to strike out of the blue, but that's the way it is. There is no one to warn you, no one who can.  

 You didn't go to dinner. You told Namjoon not to wait for you, you would eat later. Climbing down the stairs, you stopped in front of the door and knocked. The reply was the same and Yoongi opened the door like every time.  

Every room had a medical kit in the bathroom, the one in this had to be restocked twice in the past few days.  

 Hoseok gave you a small smile and extended his broken arm. Sitting on the edge of the bed, you started telling him of the time you had spent in the Caribbean Sea. You had stayed there for a few months and had spent most of that time in Jamaica and Puerto Rico. The sandy beaches, the endless turquoise sea and the colorful houses didn't fail to bring a smile to your face. The people had been welcoming and kind, eager to help with any problems production faced. They invited you to nights full of dancing and music and included you in everything like you belonged there.  

 The movie you had filmed wasn't one of your biggest hits. It wasn't nominated for an Oscar and although it did earn much recognition and was played at multiple international film festivals, it wasn't as successful as your other films. But it was the most fun you had had filming. The actors were incredible both at their job and out of it. You had spent some of the best nights of your life there.  

 As you fastened the splint in place around Hoseok's arm, you told him of the night they had lit large bonfires along the beach and all the people in the area had gathered around to have a few drinks and dance. Your mind, however, wasn't on the story. A fractured arm and a rib wasn't something you should be treating at home. It didn't matter how many first aid classes you had attended, a lot of things could go wrong. But it was either this or nothing. When you had suggested taking Hoseok to the hospital, Yoongi had almost bitten your head off.  

Hoseok was laying back against the pillows with his eyes clothes when you were done. He was doing better. Having regular meals and being able to wash made the improvement more evident. He didn't complain when you were treating him but you could see his eyes clenching shut when you were applying salve to the most tender spots. The stories helped. They distracted him and you could work easier. He rarely spoke but lately he had been brave enough to voice any questions he had and you had readily answered him. Progress. Progress you hoped wouldn't halt now.  

"This is it for today," you said, rubbing your hands together and getting up. "In a few days you won't have any trouble moving around on your own. Not anything too strenuous, though, no running or jumping around."  

"Thank you." Hoseok spoke softly, like being any louder would break an unspoken rule. Like it would get him punished.  

Yoongi was sitting on the chaise lounge by the glass wall, facing away from you. The fire pits were lit all the way along the balconies, flames licking up the darkness of the night. He didn't look at you while you were there, only stealing glances when he thought you weren't looking. When his eyes met yours he would scowl and look away.  

"There is something I wanted to tell you," you started. You didn't know how else to say it so you jumped in head first. "I was called to Virginia for work. I'll be leaving the day after tomorrow." Yoongi's back stiffened, his tail stilling in the air. Hoseok's eyes turned impossibly wide. "I don't know yet how long I will stay there but it will be some time before I can come back. I thought you should know because I won't be able to treat you."  

Yoongi huffed. "Who will be our caretaker then?"  

You paused by the door. "Do you think you need one?"  

"Is this a joke?" Yoongi's fists clenched. There was no blood on them anymore.  

It wasn’t a secret that hybrids were treated like pets, that included having someone babysit them when the owner was gone. You had been through it before when you had left for New York shortly after you had adopted Namjoon, Jimin and Jungkook. Everyone had expected you to ask someone to take care of them. You hadn’t. They could take care of themselves and each other just fine.

It was the same now.

“If you think you need a caretaker I can hire one for you, but I doubt you do,” you said. “I think you can survive in the Castle without me for a few days. If I’m gone for longer than a week, Helen my housekeeper will come over to do some cleaning. She usually comes over a few times a week. And the gardener comes by quite often. ”  

Yoongi looked stunned but schooled his features quickly. Hoseok’s ears were pinned against his head. You closed the door behind you.

Why did your work’s timing had to always be that bad?

An earthquake. A fucking earthquake.

In the kitchen, the table was served. The mouthwatering smell of the food drifted in the air. Jimin, Namjoon and Jin were sitting around the table, Jungkook absent once again. No one had touched their plates.  

“You didn’t have to wait for me,” you said taking your seat. Your plate was filled with a generous slice of meat pie and fresh salad. Your stomach grumbled. You hadn’t noticed you were that hungry.

“We wanted to wait for you.” Jimin’s smile didn’t reach his eyes, it hadn’t since the day he had come running to you, begging you to take him with you to work. Jungkook spent most of his time at the atelier and he slept in Jin’s room at night. Every time he didn’t show up for meals, the light in Jimin’s eyes dimmed further.

You picked up your fork and knife and cut into the pie. The taste was heavenly, not that you had expected anything else from Jin. You told him so and delighted in the way he got flushed and tried to cover it by a terrible joke he must have come up with on the spot. While you ate, you didn’t speak much, thinking about the best way to bring up the news crawling up your throat. Namjoon squeezed your hand under the table.

When your plates were empty and Jimin was laying his head on Jin’s shoulder, you decided it was time. You put your fork aside. You started by the email, the email that had looked so inconspicuous at first because you received emails like that all the time. An email labeled “important” was often not as important as the people sending it thought it was. You couldn’t have guessed what it contained inside. You hadn’t been prepared.

Your leg was moving up and down on the metal foothold of the stool, mimicking your racing heartbeat. An earthquake had struck Virginia at night. You repeated the dry words of the email, of someone who hadn’t felt the terror of the earth shaking underneath their feet. Five point six Richter, strong enough to knock down the sets they had been building for months. You were required to be there in two days.  

Jimin’s bottom lip was trembling. “How long will you stay?”

You shook your head. It was the same question you were asking and had no answers for. Even if you called someone in the company they wouldn’t have anything but speculations for you. “I hope no more than a week.”

“Isn’t it dangerous?” Jin asked. “What if there are aftershocks, or if it was a warning for a larger one coming?”

Jin’s question brought an dreadful shine to Jimin’s eyes. You had thought of that as well but your mind was troubled already as it was. Questions of your safety would take this too far. For once, you didn’t trust the company you were working with to keep you safe. You would have to do research before you left and take all the necessary precautions. You wouldn’t risk it like they had.

Namjoon wrapped his hand around his glass but didn’t bring it to his lips. “John will be with her. They will be alright.” It didn’t calm down Jimin who hugged himself tightly, dropping his head to his chest.

You couldn’t watch him suffering anymore. Getting up, you walked to him and hugged his from behind, prying his hands away so they were over yours instead. “I promise I’ll call you every day and we will text. It’s like when I was in New York and you texted me every day about what you got up to and what you were thinking. Your texts made me forget all about work and how tired I was.” Jimin sniffled but his cheeks remained dry. “It’s only a few days. They’ll be over soon. You won’t be alone here.”

Jin ruffled Jimin’s hair and the cat hybrid wrapped one arm around the oldest, pulling him into the hug. You placed a kiss on both their head, making Jin flush again. He wasn’t used to physical attention the way Jimin was but he craved it too and you were trying to make sure he felt as loved as he was.  

Namjoon held Jimin while you and Jin cleaned the table. He grabbed Jimin’s thighs lifting him up and carried him to the living room. The younger laughed all the way there, telling him to put him down. His tight hold around Namjoon’s neck told him a very different thing.

But you weren’t done yet. You had one more person to tell.

The atelier’s door was half open. You knocked once on the wood before opening it all the way. The room could be described as an organized mess. Two canvases were set up in the middle of the room and three half-finished ones stood against the cabinets. The floor was covered in newspapers splattered with all the colors of the rainbow and paint tubes were lined on the tables in no particular order.  

“I finished dinner, you can take it,” he said, gesturing to the tray on one of the tables with the hand not holding a brush.

“That isn’t why I’m here.” One of his ears perked up as you walked closer. The canvas he was working on now was a blend of shades of purple, orange and yellow with no definitive details. “What are you painting.”

He shrugged. “Don’t know yet.” Moving forward with no destination. You knew how that felt.

Jungkook hadn’t distanced himself just from Jimin but from everyone. He didn’t run to you to hug you and scent you when you came back like he used to do. He didn’t come up to the living room to watch TV and talk until you were too exhausted to keep your eyes open. He didn’t show you his progress on the paintings. He didn’t annoy Jin while he cooked (the oldest liked it even if complained). He didn’t come to meals. Meals were family time.

Being in the atelier now was different to any other time. It was the stifling feeling of an empty page, which used to be ecstasy. It was wrong, something missing.

“I have to leave for Virginia the day after tomorrow,” you said, ripping the band-aid off. The times you had said it today were too many. Surprised doe eyes turned to you. You explained the story once again and waited.

Jungkook seemed to be bracing himself for something. “Can you take me with you?”

“Take you with me?” you repeated, dumbfounded.  

He nodded. The brush he had been holding had fallen to the floor at some point painting the newspapers in a shock of deep purple. Neither of you had noticed. “I won’t bother you. I’ll listen to everything you say. You can leave me at the hotel. I won’t cause any trouble, no one will know I’m there.” He lowered his head. “I need to be away from here.”  

“Jungkook…” Your hand touched his cheek and you felt the way he clenched his jaw under the touch. “If this is-”

“Don’t,” he begged, pulling away. A pained desperation coloring his voice. “You don’t know what I did. If you did-” He took a sharp breath. “Can I come with you? Please.”

Stifling. You hadn’t considered taking any of the hybrids with you now. You had planned on inviting them along when you would go there for filming, a much more fun part of your job. This would be a busy trip and most likely far from enjoyable. It could be dangerous. But Jungkook’s eyes were begging you. He was fading away locked up in the atelier avoiding everyone.  

“Okay. If you really want to, you can come with me. I’ll help you pack the essentials,” you said. Jungkook visibly relaxed. Maybe you should have pressed more. Insisted on him speaking with Jimin before you left or after you came back. But you were exhausted and a headache was brewing behind your temples.  

Jungkook glanced at a canvas covered with a white sheet at a corner. You’d let it go for now.

When Jimin sneaked into your room late into the night, you didn’t say anything pulling up the covers in a silent invitation. Jimin crawled underneath and hid in your arms. Against every expectation you fell asleep. Orange bottle untouched in the bathroom cabinet.

The days leading up to your departure were every kind of hectic. Panic had taken over the studios and the atmosphere was tense in every meeting. No one wanted to admit the colossal mistake that could have cost the lives of so many people. The press was another matter entirely. The project could get a bad reputation before it was aired. It was emotionally exhausting, your brain working in overdrive, coming up with solutions to problems that may or may not arise. You had to be prepared for the worst.

At home it wasn’t much better. You had started packing for the weird end-of-spring weather in Virginia. The Raven Cycle books and a little research had provided you with enough information about what to expect. Dry, warm and with a possibility of thunderstorms. It could also get cold at night so you made sure to pack a few sweatshirts.  

You helped Jungkook pack his things in a similar way. He had a habit of wearing long sleeves even when it was hot so you packed a few more sweatshirts and hoodies for him. He continued not talking much but he looked calmer now that you were leaving. All you wanted to do was hug him and tell him everything was going to be alright. But you didn’t think that would be welcome.

Jimin had timidly offered to take care of Hoseok’s injuries while you were gone. You hesitated at first. While they had been here Jimin and Yoongi hadn’t interacted much. You had expected they would talk, figure out the strange tension between them, but they had kept to themselves. You gave in in the end. The worst had come and passed and you trusted Jimin to provide the basic care Hoseok needed.  

He came with you to their room before dinner and you explained to him what you were doing. Hoseok was a little more withdrawn than usual but  he didn’t protest, smiling at Jimin.

You had a long talk with Namjoon in your office the night before the day you were scheduled to leave. There were a lot of things to talk about and you tried to get everything out. All your worries and all the things you thought he should know. When you were spent and his reassurances were buried deep in your chest, he brought you close to him, rubbing his face in your neck. He places light kissed on your skin, his lips trailing up until they were touching yours.

The house was silent. You opened your eyes blearily, staring at your phone. The ringing of the alarm had stopped, leaving large numbers reading the time on the screen. The blinds were closed hiding the morning from you.  

There was a weight on your chest. You looked down to find tired eyes staring up at you. Jimin made a small sound in the back of his throat and nuzzled against you. His blond hair was soft against your fingers as you combed through it. A loud purr escaped him as you scratched the base of his cat ears. He held on to you tighter but the alarm was clear, you needed to get up and get ready. You had a flight to catch.

“No, don’t go,” Jimin whined.

You massaged his head down to his neck. “I have to get up. I’ll miss the plane if I’m late.”

In the shadows of the room you could see the pout on his full lips. “What if you miss it?”

“If I miss it, I’ll get in trouble. And I’d rather not get in trouble.” Jimin snuggled closer to you and you could smell the vanilla shampoo he loved. Mia had said in the early days that she had smelt vanilla and muffins on you and you had guessed that was Jimin’s scent. The shampoo must serve to accentuate his natural scent.  

His cat ears lowered as his tail wrapped around your bare leg. You suppressed a shudder at the feeling of the soft fur against your skin. “I don’t want you to get in trouble.”

“I know, that’s why I have to go.” You untangled yourself from the hybrid and pressed the button for the blinds to retreat. The morning light spilled into the room. It caught on Jimin’s curls painting them golden. You had an urge to capture the moment with your camera, the way he looked so soft, hair mussed and eyes still dreaming. Carving the image in your memory, you walked to the bathroom to take a shower and get ready for the day.

Getting dressed for a flight was different than getting dressed for any other work day. You liked to wear something comfortable that wouldn’t look too bad on camera. You weren’t the kind of celebrity to get mobbed every time you went out but sometimes paparazzi could get wind of where you were going and show up at the airport. When you were traveling for premieres or events, fans and paparazzi would fill the place.  

The previous night you had set aside a pair of loose black pants and a red top. You would also take your leather jacket with you because it could get chilly on the plane.  

Jimin, wearing his stripped white and blue pajamas with the little pink hearts, clung to you like a koala all the way to breakfast. He only let go of you when you placed your large black bag on the floor and took a seat at the kitchen island. Jin was finishing up with cooking, taking the pots off the stove. Breakfast was almost ready.

John would be coming later to drive you to the airport. The black SUV had turned into a sign you would be traveling. Because of the sheer volume of the luggage you always ended up with, a large car was needed to drive you to and from the airport. This time you had packed two suitcases and your handbag. You had been tempted to fill a sac-voyage as well but you quickly abandoned the thought.  

Namjoon arrived, looking wide awake. The opposite of Jimin and his drooping eyes. Only one was missing. And you weren’t compromising today.

“Jungkook?” you asked. The others exchanged a glance. It told you enough. “I’m going to go get him. I’ll be back in a minute.”

Their gazes followed you as you left. They probably didn’t believe you could get him to come up. And any other day that could have been the case.  

The door of the atelier was closed but you were sure Jungkook was inside. The amount of time he had been spending in there was unhealthy but you were the last person who could judge him, having spent the majority of your so called break in your office. You knocked three times before opening the door.

Jungkook was sitting on the floor in the middle of the room, lost in a place that used to scream comfort. Did it still? You couldn’t feel it anymore. The canvases were all in their places and the paints and brushes had been tidied up. Sitting on the paint splattered newspapers in his completely black clothes, Jungkook looked lost.

“We’re having breakfast upstairs,” you said.

Jungkook’s eyes cleared, just enough for most of the fog to disappear. One bunny ear drooped down and he swiped it away from his face. “Can’t Jin bring it to me?”

You shook your head. “Jin isn’t bringing anything to you. You will be coming to breakfast and eat with us like you used to.”

He lowered his head, both ears falling in his face. “I can’t.”

“You very much can and you will.” You tried to be gentle but you were firm on this. “You will come up and we will all eat breakfast together. We are leaving in a few hours for the other side of the United States and I have no idea when we will be back. You aren’t doing anything here and everyone wants to see you and spend some time together.”

“Not everyone.” It was so low he probably hadn’t meant for you to hear.

“Everyone,” you said, kneeling by his side. “Everyone wants to see you.” You brushed his bangs off his face, petting his ears in the process. He didn’t relax the way he usually did, melting in your hands, but he did lean into the touch. “One breakfast. That’s all I’m asking for. You said you’d listen to me if I took you with me to Virginia.”

He couldn’t disagree with that and when you offered him your hand he took it.  

Jungkook and Jimin had had a special bond. That first night you had seen it in the way Jimin cried begging you to help Jungkook, to heal him. You had seen it in the way Jungkook, beat up and having trouble breathing, was asking Jimin if he was injured, if he needed to be treated first and Jimin had cried every time Jungkook flinched but smiled and squeezed his hand to ease the pain. Nothing had changed the longer you spent with them, the way they loved and cared for each other only becoming more apparent.

Jungkook had gone to Namjoon crying, saying he had hurt Jimin but you couldn’t imagine him doing anything but loving him. Misunderstandings preyed on everyone and they were hungry for those who loved each other. They would get through it, you assured yourself. They were strong and they cared too much to continue hurting each other like this. You cared too much too, you wouldn’t let this get out of hand.

They needed a break, that’s what it was. Jungkook had been right, the trip would help put some distance between them to think clearer. You would make sure when you returned they would be ready to face whatever had happened between them.

Jimin lit up at seeing Jungkook but the light dimmed when the younger didn’t even glance his way. You sighed into your orange juice.

After breakfast Jungkook carried up his suitcase while you went to another room. Three knocks and a question of who it was. It had become routine. Hoseok smiled at you, he had been doing that more and more.  

You sat down at the side of the bed, Yoongi watching you from the chaise lounge, his ears standing alert. “I’m just here to check on you one last time before I go. Jimin will take over after this.”

Hoseok was sitting with his back against the headboard. He hadn’t been able to do that without hurting the first days. “When will you be leaving?”

Touching his arm to inspect it, you said, “John will be here in about thirty minutes but the flight isn’t for another two hours. We have to be early at the airport because the process to get on the plane takes a long time. Do you want to hear about the first time I got on a plane? That’s a funny story.”

Hoseok nodded enthusiastically so you started recounting the time you were sixteen and you had to take a plane to get to the film festival that was held in France. The short film you had directed would be played there. The only problem was that you had never been on a plane before and the prospect of flying wasn’t appealing to you in the least. It just happened that the flight was far from calm.

The check up was finished halfway through the story but Hoseok touched your arm, wordlessly asking you to finish it. At your arrival in France Hoseok’s smile dissolved.  

“I have to get going, John will be here soon,” you said getting up. Hoseok had met John only after you had told him of the time both of you had gotten lost in London. John had been insisting he knew what he was doing leading you deeper into the maze of streets. Because of that a few more stories the bodyguard had guest-starred in, the fox hybrid hadn’t looked as terrified as some people did at the side of the giant of a bodyguard.

“Thank you for,” he gestured to himself “this. And the stories. Thank you for the stories.”

You stopped by the door. “It was my pleasure.”

John was at the Castle right on time, parking the SUV close to the front door. He helped you carry everything to the car, which meant he carried the three suitcases while Jungkook insisted he could help. The bunny hybrid did help but only because John took pity on him and let him help with putting the suitcases in the trunk.  

You lowered your sunglasses. No wind and no cloud in sight. You would have a calm trip.  

You hugged all the hybrids, letting them scent you. Jimin’s eyes were growing misty and you hugged him extra hard assuring him you would be back soon. You rubbed your forehead against Jin’s and kissed his cheek in goodbye, his skin warming up under your lips. Goodbyes were hard and you’d thought you’d gotten used to them. Saying goodbye to Taylor and Zayn before tours, to your aunt the rare times you could visit her, to your friends, to the actors and the crew.  

And yet your chest was tight.

Namjoon was talking with John by the car and you heard him asking John to take care of you and Jungkook. John replied he would protect you with his life. John was your bodyguard but this had been more than a job to him for a long time.

From the corner of your eye you saw Jimin approach Jungkook. He reached to touch him, hug him. Jungkook flinched. Jimin’s hand hovered in the air before going limp. He backed away, his chin dropping to his chest and jaw trembling.  

You bit the inside of your cheek. A hand landed on your shoulder and you turned to find Namjoon standing next to you. You weren’t the only one who had watched the youngests’ exchange. You hid in his arms, forgetting about the world for a moment. The two hybrids who loved each other too much, the trip you had to take, production being halted, that godforsaken earthquake. He nosed along your neck, his warm breath tingling your skin.  

Jungkook got into the car first, an escape, and you followed soon after, a necessity. The house got smaller and smaller behind you as the car drove away. The Castle fading in the distance. Another trip. Different reasons, a different disaster, but familiar territory. Once you used to be excited about these trips, exploring a new place and living new experiences. Where had that part of yourself gone?  

But you weren’t alone this time. Jungkook was looking out of the window, his head laying against the glass. You would take him to that yogurt shop you had liked so much and you would show him the park you wanted to film at and take him to that endearing small cinema. Yeah, you would do that.

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The hotel towered over the rest of the buildings in the area. It wasn’t the same one you had stayed on your first visit last year, more grand and definitely more expensive. The company had gone all out. An admirable attempt to quell your anger, yet it continued simmering underbeath your skin. A young man was waiting for you outside, taking the suitcases from the car and leading you to the lobby.  

Jungkook looked around with wide eyes and an open mouth. There was so much glass and marble, almost everything was made using these two materials.  

The receptionist smiled at you wide, her teeth white and straight like her uniform. She welcomed you to the hotel and handed you two key cards, white with a gold line on front and the room numbers in cursive. Two cards.

“I was sure I’d forgotten something,” you muttered.

The receptionist’s smile faltered. “Is something not to your liking, miss?”  

Two cards. One for your room and one for John’s. You had notified the company about Jungkook accompanying you but you hadn’t requested another room. Granted, you had thought they would come to the conclusion on their own. One more room would have cost them a lot, though. Easy way out. But you couldn’t exactly blame them. At hotels, owners rarely bothered to spend money on a room for their hybrids.

You held the cards like a magician ready to do a trick, showing them to John.  

“Shouldn’t there be one more?” he asked.

The woman behind the desk blinked a few times. “More? Two rooms were booked in the name Y/N Y/L/N. Is there a problem?”

You sighed. “No, I guess there isn’t. Or there wasn’t supposed to be.” Jungkook watched the exchange shifting from foot to foot. His black hoodie was a size too big and he was drowning in it. “Do you have any available rooms in the same floor.”

“I’m afraid we don’t, miss. The rooms on the top floor are all booked for the night.”

“Great.” You couldn’t think of another solution, you would have to make do. “Thank you. We’ll be going now.”

“Have a nice stay,” the receptionist said.

The elevator was as luxurious as the lobby, a glass chandelier hanging from the ceiling. John had your black bag slung over his shoulder. The man with your suitcases was already gone, you would find them in your rooms when you arrived. There was a mirror to your left and leaning your back against the wall your gazed at your reflection. With your black circles hidden with concealer and carefully applied makeup, you looked just a little tired from the flight. You had brushed your hair on the plane and it fell in waves over your shoulders, curling at the tips.

Jungkook hadn’t been to a hotel before and it showed as he tried to take everything in. The lights that were on even in the afternoon, the golds and whites, the mirrors and glass and the velvet seats. It was wonderful but still it wasn’t the best hotel you had stayed at.

The elevator’s doors opened with a ding and you walked into the well-lit corridors. Doors were on either side with a sitting area at the front. You had stayed in many hotels over the years but they were nothing more than a place for rest. Sleep and shower, that’s all you did in your room. And sometimes breakfast or dinner if you didn’t feel like going out.  

Stopping in front of a white door, you checked the numbers on the cards again. The two rooms were very close, only a few meters distance from each other.

Two rooms. Right.

You handed John his key card. “So, we’ve got two rooms…” Jungkook looked at you curiously. “I hope you don’t mind staying in my room with me for now. Unless you would prefer staying with John and his snoring.”

John pointed a finger at you. “Hey, I don’t snore.”

You hummed. “Sure you don’t. What I have been hearing all those years must be the pigs outside.”  

Jungkook was trying to hide his laughter behind his hand and doing a poor job of it.

John dropped your bag by your feet. “Do you hear her? No respect for me. That’s what I get for listening to your every whim for years. I’ll go to my room now and snore in peace.”

You giggled as John struggled to swipe the key card right. With an ‘aha’, he managed to open the door and get inside. You swiped your own card, the door clicking open at the first try. Both of you had been doing it for years but John was more of a fan of traditional keys.  

The company had booked a suite for you, which you guessed was one of the best in the hotel. The door opened to a grand living room with white velvet couches and armchairs and a 75 inch TV. You took off your sneakers before stepping on the wool carpet, it was white with veins of gold running through it.

You fell on the couch, taking off your backpack and placing it on the floor. “I’m sorry for this, I thought they would book three rooms for us.”

Jungkook looked at you from where he was still standing by the door, his hands pulling at the straps of his backpack. “Why would they book three rooms?” There was a gap here. Hybrids stayed with their owners, that was the norm. You realized that was what he had expected.

“We are three people. I thought you would want your own room. I told them you would be coming with me for the tickets but they didn’t change the rooms they had booked.” You threw your head back and closed your eyes. “Everything is going so well already.”

There a shuffling of feet from the door. “I thought… I can stay with John if he doesn’t mind or… I can…”

You opened your eyes. Jungkook was looking at the floor, his ears drooped at the sides of his head. “What are you talking about?”

Jungkook hugged himself. “I don’t want to bother you.”

And it clicked. You got up from the couch. “Oh, bunny. You aren’t bothering me. I only wanted one more room because I thought that’s what you wanted, that you wanted your own space.” You didn’t touch him, remembering him flinching and pulling away, but you stayed close to show him you were there for him.  

“Oh, I-” He flushed, not knowing what to say. You had been past that stage and it was unfortunate to see the shyness and hesitance come back.

“Come on, take off your shoes,” you said, motioning for him to come further into the room. “I desperately need a shower. Then we can rest. I don’t have to do anything until late tonight. Do you want to go in first?”

Jungkook sat down gingerly on the couch. “No, no, you can go in first. I think I’ll sleep a little.”

You stopped him before he could lay down. “Here?”

Confused, he looked around at the furniture. “Should I take the smaller couch?”

“I didn’t mean it like that,” you said. “But there is a huge bed in the bedroom. If you feel uncomfortable though, I could take the couch.”

Jungkook shot up at that. “No, no way. You have work, you should sleep in the bed.” The redness creeped into his cheeks again. “I would like… I would like to share, if that’s alright.”

You gave him a smile. “That’s more than alright. Come in, then.”

You were planning to make the most out of this trip.

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Jimin had memorized everything you had said about checking and treating Hoseok’s injuries. He had memorized the pills he was taking, the salves you used and the times you checked on him during the day. Before you left, he had even looked up all the injuries Hoseok had on Google and read all the information he could find. You had told him Hoseok was well on his way to recovery and he didn’t have to worry much. But he was worried. He was very worried.

He had thought he had been ready, that he could do this. But standing outside their door, second thoughts were smothering him.

What if he did something wrong and he hurt him? What if he made everything worse? If he pressed too hard, if he used the wrong cream, if he wrapped the bandages wrong…  

Seokjin would have been much better at this. He took care of them like a parent, he would have been a better choice than Jimin. But Seokjin was the one to cook all their meals, he had enough on his plate. Yoongi could have done it but… He had only glared at you and sneered something that sounded very much like a refusal.

Yoongi…

He hadn’t talked to him since the day he had chased him to the alleyway. The older didn’t leave the room he shared with Hoseok unless it was absolutely necessary. Jimin didn’t know what he had expected, but it wasn’t this… This stasis they were trapped in. He had expected someone yelling, accusing. Sharp words, that didn’t match the soft voice he had been used to. There had been none of that. Nothing at all. He wasn’t sure what he preferred.

Hoseok smiled a little at him when he walked into the room. He was sitting up in his bed with his reddish tail in his lap. Yoongi, laying in his own bed, didn’t acknowledge him but his dark eyes were burning Jimin’s skin when he wasn’t looking.  

Hoseok patted the bed with the hand that wasn’t in a cast. His smile was smaller than it had been in the morning. Your absence wasn’t affecting only them. Jimin had heard you telling stories to Hoseok, you had done the same with Jungkook. But he had no stories to tell, nothing worth sharing. He hadn’t traveled the world, he didn’t have interesting and famous friends, he didn’t have a job or childhood memories by the beach.  

Silence spread, only broken by his apologies every time Hoseok winced. He was holding back for his sake and it made his stomach clench. He left the room like there were hell-hounds on his heels.  

The second day you were gone everyone woke up early in the morning, like all the days they had to be up early to see you before leaving for work. You might not be there but his body demanded he wake up and drag his feet upstairs for breakfast. A book was laying cover up on the table. One of the leather-bound classics you kept on the top shelves of the library. Namjoon read it at night before going to sleep.

Seokjin placed a plate of pancakes in front of Jimin. Pancakes were his favorite.

Belly full, he trudged to the second level.  

“Good morning,” he greeted, coming through the door.

Hoseok’s fox ears twitched. “Good morning,” he said with a small smile. Yoongi remained silent, standing by the glass wall.  

Jimin fetched the medical kit from the bathroom. Everything he would need was in there. “Did you sleep well?” He tried to make conversation. It wasn’t easy when he felt like he could erupt at any moment with Yoongi’s gaze on him. If he hurt Hoseok, Yoongi would never look at him again. Or he could do so much worse. But Jimin had already lost him years ago.  

“Yeah,” Hoseok replied, fumbling with the blanket he was sitting on. “I had a weird dream. About being at the lake. There was a statue there and he was talking… It was good, though.”

There was a small Greek style statue on the half-empty shelves of the room, a Kouros you had explained to him. “It must be because of that.” Jimin motioned to the shelves. “There are pieces of ancient Greece all over the house. The first show Y/N directed was about Persephone and Hades, the Greek god of the dead. Greek mythology has a special place for her.”

“She talked to me about Greece a little but she didn’t say anything about the show,” Hoseok said.

Jimin opened the medical kit, remembering watching the episodes one after the next, hanging from every word the characters said. “The show is so good! I couldn’t stop watching it, I didn’t want to get out of the cinema room for anything. The characters were perfect, Persephone was so sweet and kind but she-” He stopped himself, cutting off his rambling. The cream in his hand was getting warm.

Hoseok sat up straighter to help his work. “But what? Why did you stop?”

Jimin startled. He could at least do this, he could speak about the show. He had watched the episodes multiple times and he had asked you so many questions, some of which you hadn’t talked your way around. Hoseok didn’t wince as much as the first time and maybe Jimin go a little carried away, but he didn’t make any mistakes and Hoseok even asked questions and talked with him.  

The cat hybrid had to suppress the shivers the eyes on his back sent down his spine.

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Greek gods, fantasy, romance and mysteries. That’s what made you rich. That’s what got you this huge house and more money than anyone would ever see in their lives. The Castle. Yoongi scoffed. What a pretentious name for an even more pretentious house, but that was the way it worked.  

Yoongi disliked rich people on principle. Privileged, arrogant and self-entitled were only a few of the adjectives he would use to describe them. They thought they could control anyone because they had money and money made the world go round. Money could get you everything and that’s what they wanted. Everything. In long coats and designer sunglasses looking for entertainment in the most dubious places, feeding off the struggle of the others. Watching enraptured as others fought for their lives.

All of them were the same. It didn’t matter if they were hiding behind smiling masks or surface philanthropic acts. They were the same. And you were just like them. He refused to believe anything else. Despite how hard it was getting. But every time he was slipping, he would remember the pleads and rough hands. His resolve didn’t crack.

He heard all the stories you told Hoseok. Not that he wanted to but there wasn’t a chance he would leave him alone with you. Most of them were funny and although he didn’t want to admit, there were parts the corners of his mouth had lifted up without his permission. He was grateful for those stories, they made Hoseok forget. One rare time, when you were telling him about a disaster on set that involved three spoons, a maraca and a lost script, Hoseok had giggled and Yoongi’s heart had come close to bursting out.  

Every morning and every night you would have a different story for him and it made Yoongi wonder if they were all true or if you were coming up with them on the spot. Not that it mattered, it made Hoseok smile and that was enough. Yoongi had found himself waiting for the times you would come into their room and start talking. You had a way with words.

And now you were gone, leaving them alone in the house, alone with no one watching over them like a guard dog (except that damned wolf hybrid, but that was another case entirely). There were a few things he knew about the world and one of them was that hybrids weren’t left alone in a house that cost more than his handlers would make in their whole lives. He didn’t like surprises and he hated how full of them you were.  

Jimin had been the one to take over and you must have been somewhere in Virginia laughing at Yoongi’s expense. The younger looked good, his cheeks were full and there was a certain glow on his soft skin. Jimin had always looked beautiful but now he was ethereal. He couldn’t keep his eyes away.

Hoseok pressed a few buttons on the TV remote and groaned. After Jimin’s excitement about the show in the morning, he had decided he would watch the show. Jimin had showed him how to put it on but Hoseok was having some trouble.

“Give that to me,” Yoongi grumbled, taking the remote. He searched for the title among the options (there were too many of them).  

Hoseok pointed at one of the pictures. “That’s it! That’s it! “Land of the Gods”.”

A girl wearing a flower crown was gazing at him from the screen. He clicked on the picture and the synopsis and the episode list appeared. “Are you seriously going to watch that?”

“It must be good if Jimin was so excited about it. He was so excited he got me excited.” A smile stretched his lips. Yoongi was weak.

“What do you know about Greek mythology?”

Hoseok shrugged. “Not much but I don’t think I need to. The show has to be good if it got her where she is now. I’m sure she must have been great at her job to be this successful.”

If anything, there was no doubt you were successful. He could see it everywhere he looked. One night he had been watching the news, Hoseok long asleep, and they had talked about your newest project set to start filming in May. One of the greatest directors of our generation, they had called you, predicting high ratings and large audiences. But success didn’t necessarily mean talent and Yoongi told himself he didn’t care enough to see if you had it.

Contemplating, he sat on the bed by Hoseok’s side. “We should discuss when we are leaving.”

Hoseok’s eyes widened, his tail fluffing up. “Leaving?”

“Yeah, leaving. You’re better, aren’t you? We should be gone before she comes back.” Yoongi threw the remote on the bed.

“Oh.” Hoseok’s fox ears lowered. “I wanted to thank her, it feels wrong to leave like this.”

Yoongi sighed. He could understand Hoseok, he didn’t want to leave either. He wasn’t stupid. Having a warm meal three times a day was more than they could dream of in the streets. It was more than they could dream of when they had a roof over their heads and murky water on their tongues. These few days Yoongi had eaten and slept more than he had in three years but it had to end. It was nothing more than a polished dream. He didn’t want your pity and he wouldn’t have accepted to come here if it hadn’t been for Hoseok.

“I think she would appreciate us leaving more than a thank you,” Yoongi said. “We don’t know how long she will be gone and we have already overstayed our welcome.”

“We… yeah.” Hoseok gave in. “But you should talk to Jimin before we go.” Yoongi stiffened. “I have seen the way you look at him, you know. I heard you that first day. He is the only reason we are here now. I can connect the dots. I don’t ask you about your past because I know it hurts you but I ask you this. Talk to him before we go. Jimin… Jimin looks like a part of your past that shouldn’t hurt this much.”

Yoongi clenched his jaw. Because Jimin was the most painful part of his past. Everything that had happened to him, everything he had been through didn’t hold anything to the pain he felt when thinking about Jimin and his delicate features. Nothing hurt more than the images of that night ingrained in his brain. He didn’t deserve to forget, he didn’t even try.  

“I can’t talk to him.”

Hoseok scooted closer and Yoongi reached to steady him. The fox hybrid would laugh at him, he had the all clear to move on his own and he didn’t need help with something as simple as this, but he didn’t push him away. “Why not?  

“I just can’t.” Hoseok raised his eyebrows at him. “Hobi, just let it go. Jimin wouldn’t want to talk to me, there is too much you don’t know.”

Hoseok turned his head away. “Yes, because you don’t tell me.”

“Hobi…” Yoongi placed a hand on his shoulder, rubbing comforting circles, there were no bruises there. “What happened, it’s better if you don’t know. I don’t want any more people being haunted by what I did.”

Hoseok’s eyes softened, taking Yoongi’s hands in his own. Every touch from Hoseok was like a brush with the sun. “If you think anything you say could change my opinion of you, you don’t know me at all. You saved me, Yoongi. You saved me when I thought I was done for, when I thought I wouldn’t live to see another day. If you weren’t there, if I didn’t have you…” A shaky breath fell past his lips. He squeezed Yoongi’s hands in his and Yoongi squeezed back. “I would have never gotten out without you. You are all I have.”

Yoongi touched Hoseok’s cheek, nosing against his neck and breathing in the scent of cinnamon. “And you’re all I have.”

The first episode of “Land of the Gods” played as Yoongi laid next to Hoseok with the younger’s head on his chest.

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The workers kept looking at you like children who had been caught stealing cookies from the cookie jar and it wasn’t even their fault. They had been following instructions and using the materials the company had sent. The one who had decided to forgo the safety measures because they were too expensive had yet to admit to anything, but a storm was brewing and you would watch until the end. They could say whatever they wanted about you but no one’s life was at risk on your watch.  

You hadn’t been alone in the sentiment, most of your co-workers siding with you and calling meetings after meetings on the matter. You had taken it up to yourself to send a lengthy email to the president and were waiting for a reply that wouldn’t take long to come.

In the meantime, you were stuck with damage control. The meticulously designed sets had turned into ruins and rubble. A lot of expensive equipment had been destroyed and the replacements had yet to arrive. The first night you had a short meeting at a building the company was renting and then drove to the set to survey the damage. You had gritted your teeth at the sight of broken blocks like legos. There was nothing more to see.

You came back with heavy limbs and dust on your jeans. The air-conditioning was on and Jungkook was sitting on the couch watching a superhero movie. It wasn’t one you recognized, an older one than those you usually watched. You changed into your pajamas after taking a shower for the third time in a day (your skin barrier was set to be destroyed soon) and joined him in the living room. Neither of you had had dinner so you ordered food from the first place you found on the web. The delivery was fast and you settled on the couch, eating pizza and watching an old Samuel L. Jackson film.

Fortunately, the earthquake hadn’t caused any major disasters but you had heard that a couple of people had been injured. The most damage in the area had been to the TV show sets. That was alright, you could work on that.  

Your schedule wasn’t much different from usual. You woke up early, the sun peaking over the horizon and showering the room in its morning glow through the thin curtains. Reaching for your phone, you turned off the  alarm before it could start ringing. You woke up earlier but you scheduled it every night regardless of that. Jungkook blinked his eyes open as soon as you moved a little, he was used to waking up early too.  

At breakfast it was only the two of you, John and the hotel staff. It was way too early for anyone else. Jungkook didn’t leave the hotel and you spent most of the day outside. The first days were the most crucial and therefore the most busy. Go there, take this, fill this out, talk to him/her. An endless task list. And there were a lot of things you had to figure out yourself.

“You should come with me today,” you said, digging your spoon into the bowl of yogurt. You ate a generous breakfast to propel through the morning.  

“T-to work?” Jungkook stuttered, his hand loosening around the spoon. He was eating pancakes with maple syrup and you had a feeling about who he was thinking of.

You rolled the spoon between your fingers. “Well, you don’t have to come to work with me. We could drop you off at a coffee shop or a park if you want to. You can’t stay cooped up in the hotel room all day.”

John nodded in agreement. “I think it’s a good idea. You need some fresh air, staying in three rooms can’t be good for you.”

Jungkook dropped his head to hide his flushed cheeks. “I’m alright here, you don’t have to worry about me. Really.”

“But that’s what I’ll do at work if you stay in here for one more day,” you said. “You can go anywhere, there is a whole city to explore. And if I have any breaks I can call and I’ll come find you.”

Jungkook looked down at the pancakes. “I don’t think I should be out alone.”

“Of course you can. You can wear a collar and no one will say anything. We packed a few didn’t-?” Wearing a collar would protect him from the hybrid services, especially with your name and number engraved in the back of a charm. But you realized it wasn’t hybrid services he was afraid of. A hybrid alone in the streets could be an easy target, Jimin and Jungkook had been together that night and still… But it was broad daylight. “John could come with you,” you offered.

“No, no, he should be with you,” Jungkook protested weakly.

You exchanged a look with John, after years you were perfect at reading each other. “I actually think John would have a much better time with you. The only thing he does with me is follow me around and wait for the day to end. And it’s not like I’m in any danger there, I’m surrounded by a lot of people and some of the places have security so…”

“Or she’s trying to get rid of me,” John said, taking a bite of his sandwich. “Not that I’m complaining, waiting outside of those meetings gets very boring very quickly. Who will drive you?”

“It won’t be hard to find someone. I’ll catch a ride with Will, he has plenty of space in his car.” Will was the assistant director and he had been dragged to Virginia with you. When you worked it was rare to find one without the other. He had been with you for a few years and he was your right hand on set, he could get everything you asked done in a matter of seconds and often better than you could have done them yourself.  

Satisfied, John finished his sandwich. “It’s settled then, I’ll go with the guy while you run around like a mad woman.”

“It isn’t so much running around today,” you mumbled. In comparison to other days, that was.

Jungkook picked up his fork again, his nose twitching. “Thank you, but I really don’t know where to go.”

You smiled. “That’s the most exciting part. There are so many places you can choose from. John knows the area a little, he knows a few places worth visiting.” John saluted with two fingers on his temple. “Is there something you want to do?”

Jungkook shrugged. “The park maybe? I would like to walk a little if that’s alright.”

“Fine by me,” John said. “Let’s reconnect with Mother Nature a little.”

You shook your head. “As if the sets aren’t in the middle of nowhere. They’re like thirty to forty minutes from the city, I spend most of my day in a car.”

“Stop complaining. It’s partly your fault,” John reminded you, which only caused you to complain more.

Jungkook let out a cute giggle at your bickering. He looked small in his oversized hoodie, it was a gray one this time with design of black swirls interwining and forming a heart. He would have to change before going out. He would melt otherwise.  

They dropped you off at the set, having spent most of the thirty minute drive (John was a fast driver, always following the speed limit though) listening to music and talking about whatever came to mind. Jungkook had insisted on coming with when John dropped you off instead of waiting at the hotel for John to come back. He didn’t care that the drive would be more than an hour for him. You stepped out of the car, adjusted your backpack with all the papers and files inside and sent flying kisses to them while John rolled his eyes.

It was one of the good days, everyone was in a relatively good mood, they were listening to you and the conversations about the problems you were facing rolled smoothly. Will had taken over some of the most tiring tasks ignoring your protests so you were left to do most of the talking and the moral support part.  

They worked quickly but there was no doubt that the sets wouldn’t be ready for filming to start on the initial date you had set, you would have to rely more on the sets in Los Angeles and film some scenes earlier than planned. Time was precious and you couldn’t waste it sitting around doing nothing.

Will was more than happy to give you a ride back to the city, you had many things to discuss on the way. You hadn’t been at this park before. It wasn’t the one you were considering for filming but it was just as nice. John had texted you where they were and you had typed the address in Will’s GPS. It was way past lunch and you wondered if they hadn’t left the park since the morning. That was a lot of hours spent in a park.

You followed the cobblestone path, tall trees framing the way adorned with green leaves and tiny flowers. Sending a quick message to John asking him about more specific directions, you stopped at a bridge arching over a small river and rested your elbows on the railing waiting for the reply.  

You missed home in a way you hadn’t before. Home hadn’t always been Los Angeles, it had taken a long time for you to see it that way. It had been your hometown at first and that would always remain a part of you but it had been years since you had stayed there for more than two weeks. Home had been a suitcase and a vague idea of belonging for the most of your adult life. Being at a new place every few months, often more than that, you traveled and met people, you explored new places and learnt their secrets and culture. Los Angeles was just the base you returned to before you were gone again.

And then you had met Taylor and Zayn and suddenly you had a reason to come back other than necessity. They had become your closest friends and you held a new appreciation for the city because that’s where you spent time with them, strolling through the streets and going to the beach or staying inside watching movies or baking.  

And through Zayn you had met Jacob and Los Angeles became more and more to you. The two of you had decided to build your life there together. That was gone now but the City of Angels had sneaked into your heart and made a home for itself there. Yet you hadn’t missed it like this before.  

Texts and calls were fine for some time but not nearly enough. Jungkook was withdrawn while you talked to the other hybrids and Jimin’s voice got smaller and smaller every time the youngest refused to speak with him until he stopped trying. Namjoon and Jin tried to comfort him but the only person who could help was the one shutting him out. On top of that, Jimin tended to Hoseok’s wounds, the two hybrids were still at the Castle and you hoped they wouldn’t leave until you got back. You wanted to check in with Hoseok one more time before they were gone, back to the streets.  

The streets… Those damn streets. Where Hoseok had been beat up, where Jimin and Jungkook had been attacked, where they didn’t know which day would be their last, starving or being beaten to death. You had done all you could, when they refused any more help, but it wasn’t enough. It couldn’t be enough.

A whistle made you turn around.

“Are you going to stand there all day?” John called to you.

“Me?” you called back. “How long have you been here? Did you eat lunch?”

“We went to a restaurant nearby, John ordered the best from the menu. I told him to wait for you but he said you would be late,” Jungkook said.

You ruffled his hair and he shuffled closer to you. “Late… I’m not late, I didn’t say I would be back for lunch.”

Jungkook chuckled. “When are you back for lunch?”

You gasped. “You have been spending too much time with John. He’s corrupting you!”

On the other side of the bridge, the path opened up to a large expanse of grass with a few trees sprinkled in. Jungkook had his sketchpad with him and sat down against a tree with pieces of black charcoal, a method he had been experimenting with.  

Next to him, you pulled out a notebook from your backpack, it was your personal space where you could write anything and everything. Drawing faint thick lines on the paper, Jungkook told you excitedly about his day with John, who was sitting at a bench talking on the phone with his family.  

A shine you hadn’t seen in a while was back in Jungkook’s eyes. You took photos and sent them to the hybrids at home and rolled around in the grass. He pointed at the clouds and what each of them looked like. There was turtle, an elephant and a vase, although you insisted it looked more like an Egyptian cat.

Jungkook came with you to work later and although he was shy and stayed away from everyone else, trailing behind you like a lost puppy, he was smiling. Fascinated, he listened to your conversations about the show and the sets and admired the designs. Your co-workers cooed at the cute bunny hybrid and he flushed hiding behind you.  

When the day was over and you were back at the hotel, you realized it was the most fun you’d had since coming to Virginia. Freshly showered with his wet hair sticking to his forehead, Jungkook slipped into the bed next to you.

“Did you have a good time?” you asked. In the quiet of the night it felt wrong for your voice to be louder than a whisper. “You can be honest with me. I won’t take it personally.”

A small smile simmered on Jungkook’s lips as he turned on his side to look at you. In the lights of the city coming through the window, his chocolate brown eyes seemed black. “I had the best of times. Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me. It was nice having you there, it was… different. A good different. You should come again tomorrow, to the sets outside the city this time.”

“I would like that,” he whispered.  

“Okay.”

“Okay,” Jungkook repeated in a breath.

It would be nice to have him with you. He wasn’t distracting you, on the contrary you were more focused because you knew he was there watching you, you wanted to show him the best of you. This was far from the most exciting part of the process of making a film but it was necessary. Well, it wouldn’t have been necessary if someone hadn’t decided to purposely forget all about the safety measures but you had already dedicated too much of your energy being angry about it.

Once the actual filming had started you would take Jungkook with you and show him the behind the scenes of how a TV show was made. If he was fascinated with this part then he would love filming. The actors were incredible and they had found their connections to the characters, channeling them at the table readings, it would be even better when they were in the costumes on set.  

“I liked it,” Jungkook said. “I really liked seeing you work.”

You smiled at the bunny. “You used to see me work every day at the Castle.”

“But it wasn’t the same.” Jungkook laid his head on his hand. “You looked different there,” he said. “You looked powerful, like you could do anything. Everyone looked at you like you had all the answers.”

“It was a good day, I guess. It isn’t always like that. I might look confident and like I have everything under control all the time but that’s far from the truth.”  

For all of your fame and the praise you received, you did make mistakes, you got stuck and felt helpless against some problems. Not everyone listened to you and you got into arguments with the executive producers sometimes. And you weren’t always the one who was right.  

“Looking confident is half of the job, even when you don’t feel like it. It’s one of those situations where ‘fake it till you make it’ is a requirement. When you want to be heard you have to look and act like you are sure of what you’re doing, especially when you are a young woman at an important position. If you don’t, people begin to doubt you and if they doubt you, they will begin to talk over you and disregard your opinions. That was the first lesson I learnt on this job.”

At seventeen, you had been in charge of directing “Land of the Gods” and it wasn’t all smooth sailing, much less at the beginning. You were young, too young for most of them. You couldn’t direct such a project they said. They questioned your every move and decision, every correction you made and everything you said to the actors during a scene. They didn’t take you seriously until halfway through filming and even then they didn’t hesitate to question your authority. A constant battle of wills.

But it had gotten you here. You couldn’t complain.

“You’ve done so many things,” Jungkook said as if in awe. “All those shows and movies. And they are all so good. You are so talented. I could have never achieved what you have even if I wasn’t…” He left the sentence hanging.

You adjusted your position, laying on your forearm. “I don’t believe that, I think you would be marvelous at whatever you did. You have the dedication and that’s half of the job done. About me…” You let out a small chuckle. “I was very young when I started, I’m still young considering my profession, and I had so many ideas. I still have so many of them.” Or you used to, before the buzz in your brain became just noise. “And I don’t want to wait so long the industry gets tired of me, I have to take advantage of the light as long as it’s on me.”

“I don’t think they can get tired of you, not when your movies and shows are… like that. I couldn’t get tired of them,” Jungkook said. “It’s just- I’m not-” Frustrated, he cut himself off. “You work too much. I’m just… When was the last time you had a break? An actual break without working in any form.”

You opened your mouth to answer and closed it again. It certainly wasn’t this year and it wasn’t last year either. When you had taken a break to buy and decorate the house, you had been answering calls about work when you had been choosing the paints for the walls and writing scripts while you discussed floor plans. Break for you wasn’t a time you didn’t work but rather a time they couldn’t call you to the offices or the set.  

“It’s been a while,” you said in the end. “I’ve got a lot of things going on, I don’t really have the time to take a break. I can’t leave them hanging, they rely on me.”

“Maybe they shouldn’t. Not so much.”  

But that’s how it has always been for as long as you could remember. You were involved in every single part of the process, in every decision, from the scripts, to casting, to the set and costume design, to the actual filming, the post-production and the editing. Supervising and making sure that everything was right. That was your charm, that was one of the reasons you were one of the most sought-after directors in Hollywood. Each project was a part of yourself. If you let those responsibilities go, what would that mean for you? What would they say about you?

The air-conditioning made a small sound as the room reached the desired temperature. The setting wasn’t too low, a pleasant coolness replacing the stifling heat. The thick walls of the hotel kept the heat of the day trapped inside, something that would be very beneficial in winter but a lot less so in spring nearing summer.

“Anyway, I think we’ll be done in a few days,” you said. “We’ll probably be home by the end of the week. The new plans have been drawn and there is only one more meeting I have to attend and that’s more for appearances’ sake than anything else. The rest is up to the crew here.”

Jungkook’s smile wavered. “So soon? Don’t you have any more work? The people here seemed to need you.”

“They don’t need me, there is nothing more I can offer them. My place right now is in Los Angeles, that’s where they need me.” You nudged his foot with yours, your knees were close enough to touch every time you moved. “But that’s not what you’re nervous about, is it?”

Jungkook shook his head, hiding half of his face in the pillow. “I don’t want to go back.”

“Kookie…” You nudged his foot again until your legs were intertwined underneath the thin sheets. “Staying here won’t help anyone. You have to talk to him.”

Jungkook closed his eyes as if the conversation pained him. “He shouldn’t want to talk to me.”

“But he does. You know he has been asking for you,” you said.

“He stopped.”

“Because you never replied. Doing this, pulling away and ignoring him, you’re hurting him more than whatever you feel guilty for. You didn’t see how sad he was every time you didn’t show up for a meal or when he called for you and you ignored him. You’re hurting him and I know that isn’t what you want so why do you keep doing it?”

A sob clawed out of Jungkook’s throat and he tried to muffle it with his fist. Your eyes widened at the sound, instinctively pulling the younger boy into your arms. He didn’t fight you, holding on to you like you were the only thing keeping his afloat, hiding his face in your neck as the sobs he couldn’t suppress fell from his lips.  

“What… What I did to him was h-horibble. I-I took adva-advantage of him,” Jungkook chocked out as his tears dampened your skin. “And I know, I know he’s going to forgive me. But I don’t want him to. He shouldn’t. He shouldn’t forgive-” A sob cut him off. “I don’t deserve forgiveness.”  

You run your hands through his hair, scratching gently at the base of his bunny ears, something that used to calm him down. “Baby… You should let him have that choice, you can’t take it away from him.”

“I can’t forgive myself,” he muttered, desperation and heartbreak seeping into his voice like water through the cracks of a dam until it breaks.

“If Jimin can forgive you then you can work towards forgiving yourself. All I know is that you love each other too much to continue like this.”

♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩

It was the fifth day you were gone. Seokjin had been keeping track, the equivalent of another line engraved on the wall of a cell. He had been going to sleep and waking up alone in a bed that felt too large for one person. He had added more blankets and stuffed animals decorating embellishing his nest but it did nothing for the feeling of emptiness covering it like a veil.  

You called every day and texted them religiously, it was more than he could have expected but much less than what he craved. Jungkook sent photos of the hotel suite and of every place he visited with short captions. Seokjin smiled as his heart constricted.

It was the fifth day you were gone and he was sitting at the large table in the back garden, drinking tea at the time he would have been bringing yours before you had to go back to work. Jin didn’t consider himself a clingy person. He was loyal and protective of the people he loved, he obeyed his past owners and he took care of them. But this was new. It had been five days, the number didn’t change but Jin felt like it had been much longer than that. When his past owners left it wasn’t for long, less than two weeks, he didn’t have the time to miss them. He hadn’t missed them. Two weeks. Five days.

Jungkook would be nagging at him by now, tugging his arm or foot or whatever part of him he could get and if Jin didn’t give in the bunny hybrid would sprawl himself next to the older with his head in his lap. Despite Seokjin warnings about getting splashed with tea or coffee in the face, Jungkook stayed there.  

If you were back from work, a rare occurrence, you would insist you all spent that time together. Like a family.  

Family. Such a peculiar word. It was one of those words Seokjin couldn’t grasp the real meaning of. He was a hybrid, he didn’t have parents, the one who had given birth to him had delivered him to the scientists earning a large amount of money for her services. His first owners had trained him harsher than a pet and treated him like a servant or a living piece of decor. It didn’t matter if he’d thought of them as his family to feel better for himself, they owned him and they didn’t let him forget.  

He didn’t know what having a family felt like. But he guessed it felt a lot like the mornings before you left for work and Jungkook was bickering with Jimin about how much he could eat while Namjoon was smirking into his coffee.

“A penny for your thoughts?”  

Seokjin startled, the mug trembling dangerously in his hands. Another hand enveloped his to steady it. “How do you do that? I almost had a heart attack.”

Namjoon smiled sheepishly. “You aren’t the first one to say that, about the heart attack. I’ll try to make more noise next time.”

There was only a tiny bit of tea left at the bottom of the mug so Seokjin placed it on the table to avoid any more surprises that could threaten its survival. “Are you going somewhere?” he asked, looking at the black backpack Namjoon was wearing.

“I’m going for a walk in the forest. Would you like to join me?”  

“Like this?” he gestured to his casual attire.

“Maybe you should wear different shoes,” he said referring to the slippers he was wearing.

Seokjin was tempted to say no, sugar gliders might be native to forests but he didn’t have the same ease among trees. But he was tired of being in his own company and something inside him was screaming to go and be with his pack. After all, it was impossible to not give into Namjoon’s dimples.

“Okay, I’ll come with you. Just don’t lead us so far away we won’t be able to come back.”

Namjoon’s smile widened as Jin left to change his shoes. His sneakers were in a box under his bed. He had worn them only once because he preferred wearing his slippers in the house or the gardens. These sneakers were the ones he had on when you had gone to the lake before you had to go back to work and be away for most of the day.  

The wolf hybrid was waiting in the back garden for him by the curtain of vines with the purple blooms. The mug was nowhere in sight.

“Ready?” Namjoon asked him.

“Ready,” Seokjin said, not paying any mind to the fluttering in his stomach.

Namjoon pulled the curtain of vines aside, the path stretching ahead. The forest was alive in spring, trees green and tall, creating shade for the small creatures roaming around to hide from the sun. And when a few sun-rays slipped through the spaces between the branches and the leaves, they looked like a touch from the gods.  

Namjoon navigated the forest with practiced ease and Seokjin had a feeling the wolf hybrid knew exactly where they were going. He just hoped Jimin wouldn’t look for them while they were gone, but knowing Namjoon he had probably already told Jimin. Or Jimin could call them. Seokjin wasn’t used to having his own phone and often he forgot he had the device.  

Staying close to Namjoon, he kept his eyes on the ground. A poor attempt to keep his tripping to the minimal. But the forest was conspiring against him. Roots, stones, sticks, everything he could trip over was in his path.  

“Where are we going?” he asked.

Namjoon stopped, turning to look at him. He smirked. “It’s a surprise.”

“No, I prefer no surprises,” Jin said. Rock. He stepped over it, avoiding a possible humiliating fall. “Tell me where we’re going. Is it far?”

“Not too far.” Not too far for Namjoon could be totally different from Seokjin’s idea of not too far. “I swear to you we aren’t getting lost today. I know this part of the forest like the back of hand and I have a good sense of direction. See?” He pointed to the direction of a large tree on his right. “That’s north,” he pointed to the opposite direction, “and that-”

Before he could finish, Seokjin had tripped over a protruding root. He hadn’t seen it, being too focused on Namjoon. He let a shriek as he tumbled to the ground, scratching his hands as they came in contact with the ground fist.  

Namjoon called his name but he hadn’t been fast enough. He grasped Seokjin’s elbows pulling him up so he was sitting instead of laying face down on the dirt.  

“Are you alright?” Namjoon asked, kneeling next to him, and Seokjin felt heat travel to his face and his chest tightening. He had an urge to flee and forget that had happened. Namjoon didn’t give him the chance though. He took his hands in his, turning them over and inspecting the damage. Dirt was clinging on the flesh and Namjoon blew on them to make some it go away. “We need to clean this.” He pulled out a water bottle from his backpack and poured water on his hands. It did sting a little but Seokjin was used to much worse than this.

Thin lines were etched on his palm, none of them bleeding. His hands had taken most of the burnt of the fall. The pride he had been piecing back together hurt more than his body did.

“We should go back,” Namjoon said, letting his hands go. Seokjin mourned the loss then reprimanded himself for it. “Maybe coming here wasn’t a good idea.”

“I’m fine,” he said. He didn’t like the frown on Namjoon’s face. “We don’t have to go back. I don’t want to go back.” He cleared his throat. His face, neck and ears felt impossibly hot.

Namjoon regarded him with careful eyes. “Are you sure? Does it hurt anywhere?”

“Really, I’m fine,” he repeated. He put one hand on the ground to steady himself and get back on his feet. It didn’t work very well because as soon as Namjoon saw him moving he was helping him up supporting most of his weight. “It wasn’t painful, more embarrassing than anything else,” Seokjin muttered. Despite the low tone, Namjoon heard him and his face smoothed. “Let’s go. We will never get to that place you want before nightfall at this rate.”

Namjoon chuckled shaking his head. “If you say so.” Seokjin expected him to start walking but instead he laced their fingers together. “Is this okay? I don’t want you falling again. If you trip again I’ll keep you up or at least we’ll fall together.”

Seokjin huffed out a laugh, lightheaded. Namjoon wasn’t distant but he wasn’t open with his affection like Jimin or Jungkook or even you and feeling his hand in his had ignited something inside him he was struggling to bury.

They held hands all the way to the secret destination. Seokjin tripped a couple more times, the rocks and the roots were still there and Namjoon was too distracting, but he kept his balance. Namjoon held on his hand tighter whenever he lost his footing and he allowed himself to consider it for a moment before banishing the idea.

The walk wasn’t too long and as the trees thinned out a little, a few large rocks emerged from the ground. They had climbed higher than the level of the house, the forest and the lake stretching under them. On the side the Castle peeked between the trees and the road leading to the city.  

Namjoon helped him up the rock while he complained for the sake of it. They sat down to rest and Namjoon offered him the bottle of water he had used before, plenty of water was left inside. Seokjin insisted they shared it, he had already used half of it on him anyway.

“You like being outside so much, you have walked through most of the forest. You go on walks every day. Why don’t you go out with Y/N? Or around the neighborhood?” he asked. Namjoon wasn’t someone who could be contained in a house, he needed to be outside, and the forest looked too small for him.

Namjoon crossed his hands over his bent knee. “Being in the forest is easier. I can’t explain it but it’s familiar territory. Outside the forest, outside the house, that’s different. I know the streets of Los Angeles, I’ve spent more time on them than I would have liked. And now things are different but those streets are the same. I don’t think I’m ready to go back there alone.”

Seokjin’s heart constricted at the reminder of what the three hybrids he held so dearly had been through. He was spoiled, he couldn’t have survived a life in the streets. But if he was with them… If he was with them maybe it would would have been worth it.  

It was a dangerous world for lone hybrids, people were eager to take advantage of them and hybrid services were always lurking in large cities like Los Angeles. Going outside alone could be an invitation for harassment from a few sick people who thought they were entitled to hybrids’ lives because humans created them, who thought they were lesser. Seokjin hadn’t been allowed to be alone outside, his owners believed it was indecent and disrespectful for hybrids to walk alone or stay alone.  

“Do you want to go outside in the city?” Namjoon asked.

Seokjin hugged his knees. “I wouldn’t know where to go or what to do. I’ve never been out alone.”

Namjoon nodded. “That’s alright. It was nice being out for Spring Cleaning, I saw the city in a different light.”

Seokjin smiled, for him it hadn’t been only the city he had seen in a different light. “I would like to go out one day.”

“I would like that too,” Namjoon said softly.

But Seokjin didn’t think of going alone. He thought of being with Namjoon holding his hand so they wouldn’t lose each other or an excited Jungkook hopping around with Jimin chasing him.  

Namjoon’s phone beeped with a message and he pulled it out of his backpack to read it. A smile spread on his face at whatever he was seeing. Seokjin wanted to lean closer and look at what was making him smile but he held himself back. There were only three people it could be from.

“Jungkook is playing her assistant,” Namjoon said, turning the screen so Seokjin could take a look at the photo. Jungkook was looking to the side, probably at someone talking to him, carrying two folders and a few loose papers. Seokjin’s heart softened at the sight, Jungkook looked content there. Excited and a little confused.

Seokjin took the phone in his hands. “I’m sure he insisted on carrying them for her. Doesn’t she have an assistant?”

Namjoon nodded. “Yeah, Will. But I’m not sure he’s that kind of assistant.”

“Maybe she should keep Jungkook on set, he could carry anything she wanted,” he joked. Their bunny could pick up all of them without getting tired, Seokjin had been his victim enough times to know that.  

Jungkook had been doing better, his messages were more frequent and he talked more on the phone. He had been doing better but Seokjin was missing him a lot. But he couldn’t be selfish with this, going away had been good for him and if it hurt a little that he needed to be away from them, Seokjin didn’t utter a word. He had heard him sniffling at night, covering his mouth to muffle the sounds. Seokjin didn’t know how to comfort him so he just held him tighter.

Namjoon sighed, taking his phone back and hiding it in the backpack. He sighed. “Jimin is hiding away again. He barely spoke to me before locking himself in the cinema room. I don’t understand what is going on between them. Jungkook had to travel to the other side of the States to get away.  I can’t get a word about what happened from either of them. Jungkook says he did something horrible to him and Jimin doesn’t want to say anything about it. And every time Jungkook pulls back from him I can see how much it hurts them both and I can’t do anything about it.”

“They don’t want us to do anything about it but they need us next to them,” Seokjin said, looking ahead at the sun slowly descending in the sky.  

Namjoon let the silence stretch before speaking, “I’m grateful you’re with us, that you chose to stay. I don’t like to think about how it would have been without you.”

Seokjin turned his head away. “I didn’t do anything special. I am not that important.”

A hand touched his cheek, leading him gently until he was face to face with Namjoon looking into his hazel, almost golden, eyes. “Listen to me when I say this; you are important to us. You are pack and your place is with us here. I’ll be honest, I was weary at first but you fit right in like you were always meant to be with us. You belong with us and we’ll never let you go or get tired of you. You give so much without even realizing it.” His thumb rubbed small circles on his skin leaving burning trails behind. A heavy cloud had covered everything around him and all he could see was hazel eyes. “All I ask you is to let us take care of you, too.”

And before his doubts could stop him he surged forward. Namjoon caught him in his arms, cradling the oldest’s neck as he hid his face in his neck breathing in his scent. Time was meaningless there.

♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩

You were taking a short break. John had delivered your second cup of coffee for the day and a smoothie for Jungkook who disliked the bitter taste of coffee with passion. It was a mostly practical day that didn’t require a lot of moving around. You had been meeting up with people since the crack of dawn and discussing the best ways to cover up the disaster in a way that wouldn’t turn the public against the show or the studios. So far, you had been holding off any reporters from including the overlooked safety measures when publishing the news about the collapsed sets.  

After being inside all day, you had decided to take a stroll around the block. Jungkook was walking next to you sipping his smoothie. He was wearing a simple black chocker with a silver charm.

He was telling you about a video he had seen on YouTube when your phone started ringing. Your nickname for Taylor was displayed across the screen with a photo of her pulling out a tray of cookies from the over.

“Hey, Tay,” you said.

“I called at the right time, didn’t I?”  

“Just the perfect time, I have around twenty minutes before I have to go back. Work has been kicking my ass.”

Taylor laughed. “I’m sure you’ve been kicking its ass too. And better.”

You had told her around what time you would be taking your break. You hadn’t talked on the phone since coming to Virginia and you had missed her voice.

You stopped at a bench and Jungkook pulled out his phone. You felt a little bad for talking on the phone when it was the two of you but you had really missed Taylor and it wouldn’t take long anyway. She had been busy with Astrid, getting to know her better and helping her adapt to the new environment. When you had visited the hybrid had looked enamored with Taylor, you knew your friend would be amazing at taking care of a hybrid.

The conversation soon turned to you but you didn’t have much to share. Work was the same regardless the disaster but Taylor was more interested in other things.  

“It has been almost a year since you and Jacob broke up. Don’t you have your sight on anyone? Any flirts? It isn’t like you lost the one and only,” she said.

Jacob had been far from the one and only. And when she asked, your mind went to dangerous places.

“Just because you found your man doesn’t mean we are all that lucky,” you said. “And how am I supposed to find anyone? I’m too busy.” From the corner of your eye you saw Jungkook turning to look at you with an unreadable expression.

Taylor continued, “Aren’t there any cute boys on set? At work? There has to be someone. Don’t bury yourself in work and forget to live. I’m not saying you need a man to be happy or complete, but don’t you miss going on dates? Getting to know someone like that?”

The answer came to you unbidden but it wasn’t something you were ready to say. “Maybe after the TV show, for now I really have to focus. After that is done and I don’t have to worry about anymore earthquakes, I’ll see where I’ll end up.”

You knew Taylor cared for you and she worried about how deep you threw yourself into work. Maybe there was also a small part that was still uncertain about the way you and Jacob had broken off things and the way you had avoided the topic like the plague for the first months. Like you and Jacob had never happened. But looking at boys and dating had been the last thing on your mind.  

Ending the call with Taylor promising to text her when you got off work, you patted the small of Jungkook’s back. It was time to walk back. The smoothie was half-finished, the way it had been before, like he hadn’t taken a sip since sitting down.  

You asked him if there was something wrong but he replied that everything was alright. It didn’t look like that was the case. He stayed close to you all day, more clingy than he had been the whole time you had been in Virginia, wary of the men who talked to you.

♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩

The blue sky and fluffy clouds reflected on the lake, a huge mirror creating another sky on its surface, a more vibrant but precise copy. No boats cut through the water, it was like there was a part of the sky that had made its home on the ground. Trees extended on every side of the lake, so many of them one next to the other with no end in sight.

The grass tickled Jimin’s palms swaying in the gentle wind. He breathed in the fresh morning.

“One day we’ll go on a boat ride.” Jungkook was sitting next to him, his long bangs falling at the sides of his face. “We’ll see every part of the lake, not just this. We’ll go everywhere.”

Flowers bloomed all around them, white and blue petunias, chrysanthemums and lilies. Jimin wanted to cut the most beautiful one and tuck it behind Jungkook’s ear. He turned to tell him but hands were holding the back of his neck and lips devouring his. He gripped Jungkook’s arms to steady himself from the force of the kiss. The sweet aroma of the flowers filled him up, engulfing every part of his being, the deepest crevices and the smallest of cracks.  

Jungkook pushed him back so he was laying on the grass and Jimin let him, too drunk off the flowers and soft lips. Touches on his cheeks and his sides, caresses under his shirt. He was burning.  

It didn’t take long for the panic to set in. With weak arms, he pushed Jungkook away. The air wouldn’t reach his lungs. The scent of the flowers turned stale and bitter.  

“We can’t,” he tried to say but his voice wasn’t coming out right, sticking in his throat and refusing to flow.

Jungkook pulled back. His eyes were darker than before. “Is this it? Am I too common for his highness? You didn’t have any reservations about the panther hybrid, did you? Are you attracted to power, Jiminie? Or do you open your legs only for him?”

There were sharp blades piercing Jimin’s chest. How did he know? Who had told him? No one was supposed to know.

Two figures were hiding between the trees in the darkness the day couldn’t chase away. Your hands were crossed in front of your chest and Yoongi was standing right behind you.  

Jimin took a step back colliding with the fountain at the entrance of the Castle. The house was looming over him, ominous and tall as if it could touch the sky. His clothes were torn, dirt and blood staining them. They were the clothes he had been wearing the day you had found them.

“I’m sorry but you can’t stay here anymore,” you said. You knew what he had done, you knew his dirty secret and he was paying for it again. He would be paying for it his whole life. A pain so powerful he felt like he was dying bloomed in his chest as rivers of tears rolled down his cheeks. His knees were weak. He couldn’t stand.  

He searched in the faces of his pack, of the people he loved so much he thought his heart would burst. Nothing but sneers and gazes of pity. Whore, they whispered. Slut. Worthless.  

Jimin crumbled to his knees. He was dying. He was sure he was dying. Spasms wrecked his body as he sobbed. He had nowhere to go, he had no one but them. He couldn’t live without them.

And when he thought it was over, that it was the last breath he was taking. He opened his eyes. His chest was heaving, his heart beating like a wild animal scratching at the bars of its cage. He was in their room, the glass wall looking out at the forest. Only the moonlight fought the darkness.

The sheets were restricting him and pushing him down, tangled around his body. Frantic movements born out of desperation took over his body and he stumbled over the edge of the bed, falling hard on the floor with the sheets wrapped around his legs.  

And it overflowed.  

The sobs and tears. He pulled at his hair and scratched his skin. They couldn’t know. No, they could never know. You would never look at him the same way. He would lose the only home he has ever known.

He wanted to scream. Scream until his lungs were empty and his body stopped shaking. Scream until he didn’t feel worthless and used like an old toy forgotten in a corner of the attic.  

There were arms around him, prying his hands away from his hair and skin. He tried to pull away but they only held tighter until he gave in and sunk into their warmth. Blood was rushing to his ears and he only made out his name falling from the other person’s lips. He rocked in his arms, cursing himself and the world. Weak. He was so weak.

Fucking pathetic.

He gripped the hands holding him. He focused on the voice speaking although he couldn’t understand what it was saying. He choked on the bile in his throat, his body shaking with his sobs.  

“Jiminie, breath. Just breath,” the voice said and Jimin tried to listen to it. He did. But it felt like he hadn’t been able to breath for a while. “Just like this. Breath with me. That’s right, like this. Breath. You’re doing so well, Minie.”

Spent, Jimin fell on the chest behind him, shaky breaths leaving his lips. One of the hands rubbed his stomach over his nightshirt.  

“There. You’re alright. You’re alright.���

Jimin swallowed with difficulty down his scratchy throat. “Joonie?”

“I’m here. I’m here, Minie,” the other said. Jimin didn’t have the energy to look at him, laying his head on the older’s shoulder. “I’m right here.”

His breathing stuttered. Another tear escaping from his eyes, he thought he’d run out of them. “I’m sorry.”

“Shhh, don’t say that. Please don’t say that.” Namjoon’s voice was unsteady and it hurt Jimin knowing he had been the cause of it. “You’re alright. I’m always here for you but I can’t protect you from your head.”

Jimin’s tail wrapped around one of Namjoon’s arms as Jimin sniffled. “I don’t want to be alone. Please, please don’t let me go. Don’t make me leave.”

“Never. I’ll never leave you. We’ll never leave you. I’d do anything in this world to keep you safe.” Namjoon caressed his arm, moving upwards and pressing his fingers against Jimin’s left scent gland. Jimin’s whole body trembled, shivers overtaking him. Namjoon rubbed his nose against the other side of his neck, leaving kisses behind. Purring, Jimin arched his neck.  

“I love you,” Jimin whispered, unable to stop the tears from falling.

Namjoon kissed over his scent gland and Jimin felt it everywhere. “I love you, Minie. So much.”

[smallblip]

Okay, but (sorry for my english) I just really love modern hc where they perform as the band No Name during their school festival (their identities are already known and that people know they belong to one of the most famous group in the school /with nanaba and erwin/).

Levi’s the face of the group and almost half of the fans have him as their bias but they really thinks he’s asexual or bi or even gay since they never knew anyone who had been his girlfriend and he doesn’t seem to be that person to be involved in any romance.

But then he surprises everyone when during their performance, he just grabs hange’s ponytail and kissed her deeply.

And people were just like—oh, shit, wait, what.... levi just—kissed his friend....his....friend.....Hange....the Hange

Then the crowd went wilder and even Levi’s fans just gasped with excitement because—damn that’s hot!

Even Hange herself were surprised but she couldn’t do anything since levi’s grip was too strong, lost in his own world as he ravishes her with kisses as if he doesn’t give a shit about everyone watching them

she doesn’t even know how long it lasted.

Then there’s Erwin in the crowd, capturing every moment with a camera because he’s the only one who wasn’t surprised about this

Stop the presses!

“Breaking news! Levi Ackerman frontman of No Name is having an illicit love affair!”

“It’s not breaking news if everyone already knows...” Porco rolls his eyes. Connie groans. Great. Now Porco is in his shot. The school’s journalism club is essentially him and Sasha with her phone’s camera. They do not have the skill nor the budget to edit him out.

“Who’s he dating then?” Sasha shoots back.

“Heard it’s a girl from another school.” Porco shrugs.

“Heard he’s gay...” Reiner offers.

“You just want him to be gay...” There’s sniggering and Reiner wants to punch Porco, but he’s a man of discipline, so no violence before breakfast.

“It’s just a rumour! He isn’t dating anyone! Levi’s too cool to date.” Eren says, gagging at the mention of the word. A literal child.

“Who would wanna date him?” Mikasa scoffs.

“Everyone in the school apart from you, Mikasa...” Petra says, “he’s dreamy...”

Connie urges the discussion on, Sasha capturing all of this. This is the best content they’ve gotten all week. “Come on! There are no bad answers!”

“Maybe he’s dating a fan?” Bertholdt says.

“Maybe he’s dating Hanji... They do seem rather close?” Pieck says, and the silence and scowls are intended to shame her. Connie looks at the aluminium foil on Pieck’s head. Right. The Signs movie screening organised by the conspiracy society is today.

“No bad answers except that one...” Connie says.

—

“You’re the talk of the town again...” Mike says, “they were discussing you on the school’s YouTube channel.”

Levi tsks. He doesn’t know why Mike bothers with that crap. It’s a pretty high quality production... he had justified, but there’s nothing high quality about Sasha’s shaky hands and Connie’s head covering half the frame. Everyone knows Mike enjoys the gossip, and there’s no one that enjoys it more. Except maybe Erwin.

“Do tell! Who is the enigmatic Levi Ackerman dating?” Erwin teases. He knows he’s not getting anything out of tight-lipped Levi. But it’s still worth a shot. Also worth seeing how annoyed he can get. Plus it’s not like they don’t already know.

If the canteen hadn’t been so goddamn full, Levi would’ve relocated long ago. Then again, his lunch groups hasn’t changed since his first day at school. The routine works.

“I’m sure you boys would be the first to know...” Nanaba chuckles. She had been the first to know and frankly. Levi’s inability to confess has been getting stifling. The only thing that really breaks the conversation though? Hanji tripping and landing face first on the table, lucky for her Levi moves her tray out of the way, saving her lunch, “watch it four eyes!”

“What did I miss?” Hanji asks, eyes already gleaming at the possibility of new knowledge.

“We were just talking about Levi’s illicit love affair.” Mike says. This is getting interesting.

“Awww Levi! You didn’t tell your ol’ pal Hanji that you were seeing someone?”

The rest of them exchange looks. God she’s so goddamn oblivious.

“Eat. We’ve got band practice before class.” Levi says, fingers already working to peel Hanji’s orange for her.

Nanaba winces. So goddamn oblivious.

—

“So we enter school today and Sasha what do we see?”

“Merch!” Sasha pops in front of the screen and does jazz hands with Connie.

“In the lead up to the big No Name concert, everyone’s donning their best No Name merch! First, let’s speak to the best in the game, Armin Arlert.”

Armin fidgets awkwardly, “ahaha I’m just a fan who just happens to make high quality merch.” Modest for someone earning big bucks from his enterprise.

“Ah... And you have competition this year!” Connie says into the microphone, which is really just rolled up newspaper.

“Well... The quality of my work speaks for itself...” Armin smiles sheepishly at the camera, but there’s something insidious in his eyes. Armin has to admit having sole monopoly over No Name merchandising in school has gone a little stale. Surely a little competition will spice things up.

“So Zeke, care to tell us more about your entry into the merchandise game?” Connie asks the bearded boy. Who has a full grown beard at their age? Connie makes a mental note to insert “sells bootleg merch” in the little panel that runs below Zeke’s interview. The whole school is also pretty sure Zeke had been behind the whole oregano debacle last year- someone had been passing oregano off as weed and selling it to the younglings.

“What’s there to say? Mine’s cheaper.” Zeke winks.

“So, satisfied customer. Why did you choose to buy Armin’s merch over Zeke’s?” Connie asks.

Pieck glances down at her Hanji shirt, “Armin got Hanji’s nose right.” She smiles.

In the background Armin and Eren are yelling at one another.

“How could you Eren! I thought we were best friends!” Armin says. Maybe the competition spiced things up a little too much.

“It was cheaper Armin! So much cheaper!”

Eren is wearing the ugliest shirt in school so, is it really worth it though?

—

“We are absolutely not blowing our budget on a confetti canon!”

“But Levi!” Hanji whines, “you already rejected so many of my ideas...”

“May I remind you that your previous ideas include a guillotine on stage, you repelling from the ceiling-“

“A tiger...” Mike adds and Hanji shoots him a look, traitor...

“It was two tigers...” she mutters under her breath. “Aww Levi you never let me do anything fun!” She pouts and Mike watches as Levi’s resolve slips an inch. There’s nothing more disgusting than the weakness of a man in love. Mike rolls his eyes. He had told Erwin if he wanted in on the action, he should join their band. There’s just so much to see that Mike has honestly had his fill. Or maybe he’s just saying it. Damn Nanaba was right, he enjoys this more than he’d care to admit.

“If you shut up through the next five songs, I’ll buy you dinner.”

“What about me?” Mike huffs.

“Deal!” Hanji shouts triumphantly, “and if you let me sing the chorus with you on this next song at the concert I’ll buy you dessert!”

“Almost as if I’m invisible...” Mike mutters.

“Fine... Deal... If you can hit the notes that is...”

“Ohhhh snap!” Mike says, and Levi turns to him for a high five. Mike smashes a beat on his drums. Hanji deadpans.

Ba dum fuckin tiss indeed.

—

“So it’s two days before the festival and the big No Name concert. Today, we’ve got a special treat for you. Roving reporter Jean Kirschtein will find out more about Levi’s love affair, straight from the horse’s mouth!”

Jean shoots Connie a dirty look. But the pun had not been intended. Connie mouths a quick apology before continuing, “but first, a word with the people closest to him-“ Connie nudges Jean towards the general direction of Erwin, Nanaba and Mike. Remember you owe me Jean! Connie whispers harshly when he senses his friend’s hesitation, now go!

Jean groans once more. God his reputation was going to take a hit. He’s vice captain of the soccer team for God’s sake. He doesn’t need this.

“Erwin Smith! A word? Uh... Thoughts on the rumours surrounding Levi Ackerman’s love life?” Jean asks. “Erwin Smith, football captain, history club president, student council treasurer, overall overachiever, and Levi Ackerman’s friend” appears on the screen. They all know if anyone’s likely to spill, it’s going to be Erwin.

Erwin’s eyes light up, he’s finally going on the channel he watches religiously with Mike. There’s so much he can contribute, so much gossip to share, so much insight. Maybe they would even invite him as a panelist on their show. The sheer power! He looks at Nanaba and she frowns at him and shakes her head. Ah damn it! He knows she’ll tear into him if he divulges too much.

“That’s strictly on a need to know basis.” Erwin grins.

“Well... Can you give us anything at all?” Jean asks. Please for the love of god he needs to pay Connie back somehow for setting him up on that date with Mikasa. God is generous but he can easily take it all away.

“We have good, solid guesses, but other than that... No... We can’t confirm anything...” Erwin answers, but not before glancing at Nanaba. She’s nodding. Good, that’s a good answer. Ambiguous enough to keep people wanting. Erwin is relieved. Jean isn’t however, he’s now certain that his debt is going to be rolled along a tab he will soon never be able to pay.

“Oh and the history society’s having quiz night next week, be there or be square!” Erwin plugs.

“Nerd!” Nile yells from across the hallway and Mike chortles.

It doesn’t take Jean long to find Hanji, after all she’s president of the biology club, so why wouldn’t she be in a lab elbow deep in a vat of something Jean doesn’t want to know the name of. It’s her kingdom with a whopping total of four subjects.

“Hanji Zoë, I’m here to ask for the latest on Levi Ackerman’s love life-“

Hanji Zoë- the school’s resident oddball, the genius herself, in the flesh, eating a checkerboard cookie. She looks up at him and there are crumbs on her face.

“Oh! Hi Jean!” Hanji looks up momentarily, “that’s easy, Levi’s in love with me.” She winks at Jean and chuckles. Jean’s jaw drops, surely she’s kidding. Hanji’s known for that after all- her quick wit and dismal personal hygiene. He chuckles awkwardly. “Yeah... Okay...”

“See you at the concert?” She beams at him and he replies enthusiastically. Is she kidding? Everyone’s gonna be there. But Jean remains strategic, he leaves right before she gets the chance to talk his ear off about joining her club again. “Shoot... There goes another one...” she says under her breath as he exits the lab.

Jean bumps into Levi when he’s leaving the lab, odd, what’s Levi doing here, no matter, Jean has a job to do.

“Levi Ackerman! Care to comment on the recent rumours surrounding your-“

“No.” Levi interjects and heads off.

Jean flips the camera so he’s in it, “well, that’s the scoop. Back to you Connie and Sasha.”

—

“It’s the day of the festival! But really the whole school is buzzing with anticipation for the No Name concert!” Connie announces into his makeshift mic.

“Will there be another accident on-stage this time? Will Levi Ackerman reveal more on his secret romance? Is there even a secret romance to begin with? More importantly, will Porco Galliard finally pay for his own food at the festival?”

“Hey!” Porco whips his head around to glare at Connie, “did Reiner get you to say that?”

Connie shrugs, “we’ll find out after these messages...”

The concert is a blast, from a spectacular entrance (choreographed, no doubt, by one Hanji Zoë), to Mike’s drum solo, to Levi’s vocal riffs. But there’s an anticipation of another sort- will Levi Ackerman finally address the rumours of his love affair?

“My Levi-Hanji senses are tingling Nanaba...” Erwin says mid-concert. As the self-proclaimed expert on school gossip, there’s no gossip sweeter than that which surrounds his two best friends. Nanaba thinks it’s an overstatement of his abilities.

But Nanaba feels it too- the electricity in the air, “i think it’s finally happening!” She says, nothing short of a vision.

Levi announces the last song for the night, and he makes his way over to Hanji during the last chorus.

HUH?

Sasha’s cameras are rolling. She holds her breath, for what she doesn’t know, but she feels it coming, call it director’s intuition if you will.

Hanji looks at Levi and beams past the bandages over their eyes, now upgraded to a material they can actually see through, ever since that one accident with Hanji trying to execute a stage dive completely blind. It’s not fun explaining to the ER nurse how you managed to fracture your arm in so many locations.

Hanji’s expression changes to one of confusion when Levi closes the distance between them. This isn’t part of any plan. Her lips part in a gasp. The crowd falls silence, breath collectively held in anticipation. It’s happening. The most significant and exciting moment of their young lives.

What in the name of Maria, Rose, and Sheena!

Levi grabs Hanji by her ponytail and crashes his lips into hers. She forgets how to function, her guitar now hanging limp and forgotten. But her arms find their way around Levi’s neck. It’s just Mike on the drums now, roaring with laughter.

“Hell yes!” Mike exclaims and it’s captured by one of the mics, joined by Nanaba and Erwin at exactly the same time. There’s a flash from Erwin’s phone, there, immortalised in a photo forever. He knows it’ll come in handy one day. For blackmail or for a future wedding montage. Either is fine.

What just happened?

Connie’s jaw is hanging.

“Levi Ackerman and... and... Hanji Zoë?” Connie says, more for his own benefit than for his audience. Because this is Hanji they’re talking about? The Hanji Zoë? Resident evil genius, overall weirdo, oddly magnetic and popular amongst both the boys and the girls, Levi’s childhood friend Hanji Zoë? The answer had been staring them right in the face! Levi at the biology labs, Levi glowering at her, the bickering, the chemistry on and off stage.

Connie whips his head over to Pieck, and she winks at him, told you so!

“I don’t believe it! Stop the presses! Levi Ackerman, frontman of No Name, in love with the brilliant, the magnetic, the one and only... Hanji Zoë!”

Hanji is kissing Levi back with fervour, until they’re both blushing and giddy, the music long forgotten, and when everyone is done gawking, the crowd erupts in violent cheering. Who would’ve thought emotionally constipated Levi, Levi whose private life has been kept a secret for so long, safe from the prying hands of the school press and his loyal fans, would choose to make an announcement like this. What a night! What a spectacle!

“I guess that’s all for tonight folks, and what a fantastic and surprising evening it has been!” Connie laughs, “I’m Connie Springer, and you heard it here first!”

The confetti canon goes off. And Hanji watches with uninhibited joy as confetti rains down on the stage.

“So... Tigers next time?” Hanji says, unwrapping the bandages from her face, her eyes glazed over and more beautiful than anything Levi has ever seen. He scoffs, pressing another kiss to her lips for posterity.

“Don’t push it...”

(A/N: prompt so good I had to write a mini fic! Thank you anon💖💖💖)

[justlookingvm]

Tessa Virtue’s leap from Figure Skating Olympic Champion to Executive MBA | Kneading Dough Canada

https://youtu.be/JAAkEDRFJ1A

Host: Vinay Virmani

T: If you’re going to build something, you need options in your life. I’ll say this especially as females, it’s important to be independent. To feel like you can be self-reliant and to take care of yourself.

[Intro presented by Tangerine]

V: Tessa, welcome to Kneading Dough Canada.

T: Thank you so much for having me.

V: It’s a pleasure. Kneading Dough Canada is a financial empowerment platform as you know, where we talk money, we talk mindset, we talk about financial lessons that you’ve learned along the way to hopefully inspire the next generation.

T: Well I’m so grateful to be on, I really appreciate it. I think it’s always refreshing to hopefully lend that female lens but also maybe that perspective from the amateur sport world too.

V: Yeah, you know Tessa you’ve accomplished so much, both in your personal and in your professional life. As an athlete you have achieved so many incredible honours, you’ve represented us, this country of Canada at the highest of international levels, but what I’m really excited about is you’re about to add another accomplishment in the form of three very special letters, MBA behind your name. Talk to me about that decision.

T: It’s been you know lingering in my mind for a long time. Education was always a priority in my household growing up in my family, and I thought about law school for quite some time and then I retired at 28 or 29 and thought maybe that’s too long (giggle) and realized also I wanted to flex a bit of a creative muscle. So this MBA program has been a dream of mine for quite some time. I want to be a student again in every sense of the word and I’m eager to learn the ins and outs of the business realm and that corporate sphere that I’ve had a unique perspective of, you know for 10 15 years, but if I’m going to take on a new role whatever that may be then I really want to feel like I’ve adopted that rookie mindset once again, and earned my stripes, I’ve gotten the credibility to to deserve a place there.

V: I want to take it to the world of figure skating though, because the world of figure skating is so glamorous as a sport. You know

T: I wasn’t sure where that sentence was going to land. It could have gone so many directions.

V: I I’m so like fascinated by the world of figure skating because the glamour, the imagination, the costumes, the drama, the whole production value. It looks so beautiful and elegant, but behind it there’s also rigorous routine, training and it’s not cheap.

T: Uh huh

V: So growing up, dd you have those conversations with your family and did you understand the investment that it was taking to sort of put you through the highest levels of figure skating.

T: The 2 things that my parents were always wiling to invest in or prioritize were education and sport. And it was important to them that we were exposed to as much as we could be. I’m the youngest of four. You know I’m of two minds because on one hand I do believe they tried to shield me from the burden of that sacrifice, that they made for all kids and for you know all of these adventures. But I was also keenly aware of it. I knew the the toll and I knew the cost and um you know I felt that responsibility…

V: Was there anything that you remember early on where there was an incident or a moment where you were like, I recognize like you talked about the toll.

T: My parents were so conscious to ensure that I wasn’t carrying that weight, and yet I moved away from home  when I was 13 and I was kind of budgeting at that age for groceries and 7-eleven runs (laughs), whatever it is that a 13 year old needs. Taking taxis everywhere and I made a decision when I was 15 um to be able to do it on my own. My mom was always quick to say you know you have to look after yourself and you always have to make your own way and she was all about sort of creating that sense of security and freedom, so that I had options.

To be honest I had a tumultuous relationship with my father when I was a teen and I think it was just a decision, at that point. I didn’t feel right.

V: Yeah

T: I didn’t feel right accepting that kind of support anymore um and maybe it was a bit of pride you know, not wanting to

V: You don’t want to be dependent on anybody.

T: Totally. Yeah, and that’s not to say that I’m not aware of the privilege that I had growing up to have those opportunities. It was just a real marker of OK, if this is the path I’m choosing, um and I really need to make sure that I can I can do it on my own or in a way that really isn’t such a burden.

V: You know talking to you today has reinforced independence. You know being independent, not being dependent and and just being self-sufficient. And how gratifying that is, you know I think a lot of people, especially as you said, I hope a lot of young women watch this show and and really listen to your advice. And the fact that you took that decision at such an early age.

T: You know it’s interesting I found old journals not too long ago, and there was a page in one and I don’t know, judging by my handwriting I might have been 12? 11 or 12? And I had written my goals and that were, you know the to win the Olympics, be on Oprah, which I’ll settle for uninterrupted and Kneading Dough, uh buy a cottage, like buy a family cottage

V: Right

T: And at 12 that was on my mind and the feeling of walking into this cottage that my mom and I were able to dream of and then buy together, is so visceral and it’s it’s so much about, like I think back to being young and maybe not having, especially for her like that sense of security and and just really feeling like that can be a safe place now. Um so again it’s more of the representation of that.

V: I’ve heard you say something that has really resonated with me always because it’s something that I believe in. That the highs are so much better when you’ve experienced the lows. And obviously Scott Moir and yourself accomplished so many great things together. Something that I always try to tell the younger generation is, sometimes you have to just sit back celebrate your failures.

T: Well we learned to embrace it by making it part of our process, in that, not only did we anticipate failure and expect it and embrace it, well, we practiced it. So we learned to fall on demand, get back up, refocus, and

V: OK

T: be back into our program still trying to amalgamate as many points as possible.

V: You know I remember once um I must have been in grade school and I and I failed a few subjects. I was never a good student.

T: OK

V: And you know we didn’t have a lot of money at the time and I remember my my dad, I was really afraid to tell him that you know I’ve failed these courses and blah blah blah, but he said to the family, he said, alright everybody get ready we’re going for dinner. And we went to this restaurant that was only saved for like birthdays or anniversaries. And so we get there and he’s ordering all these great things on the menu and I’m like “dad, I don’t think you heard me like I failed, like I failed and here you are taking it t the restaurant.” And I remember he looked at me and he said “You know I want you to celebrate this failure. I want you to take it in because if you’re winning all the time, you’re not going to learn anything.”

T: Wow, and obviously that stayed with you

V: Oh yeah, you’re always going to learn so much more from the losses.

This next set of questions is called the two cents round, so you can’t overthink these things.

Tessa, we all know about your discipline but what do you splurge on?

T: Clothes

V: Clothes, OK, all right. What part of your budget are you working on lowering?

T: Clothes (big laugh). Actually not really because I will say, it’s more what it represents like part of that is like my I love it and it’s become also intertwined with my career and my brand if you will. Um

V: Its an investment in yourself.

T: I think so, that’s how I twist it

V: So, what is us the best financial decision you’ve made so far?

T: Hire the right people

V: Building the right team around you.

T: Yeah absolutely.

V: Describe your financial persona in just one word.

T: I want to say careful?

V: Careful.

T: Careful in that I’m strategic

V: I like that, OK

T: But I’m willing to have some fun.

V: OK, all right. Tessa if you could run any business, what would it be?

T:  My own.

V: Your own. OK. All right I’m not going to push you more. [Tessa laughs]. They say patience is a virtue, how long did your first paycheck last?

T: I mean I spent my whole career basically operating at a deficit, so everything went back into training. I worked towards certain things and the you know I was really fortunate to get some funding and bursary grants, and then eventually sponsors and um was able to build this little nest egg, but mostly  it went right back into training.

V: Tessa, this year we’ve been having such important and meaningful conversations about women in sport. And you know of course there’s such a long way to go for those conversations really to achieve equality, but as somebody who’s such a big advocate for women’s empowerment in sport, how do you feel that you want to lend your voice to those conversations?

T: I think, currently the biggest impact I feel I can have is really connecting with those young female athletes at that precipice of maybe dropping out um for all the heart breaking reasons that we’re learning about through research. Whether that is you know body image, or lack of self-confidence, lack of self-worth, it’s just not good enough. Like the access to resources, there are opportunities, um I think those conversations are really important and that’s where I’ve been feeling most fulfilled, when I’m able to connect with those athletes and you know I’ve been able to benefit from all of the lessons and the opportunities that sport has lended it uh to my life. And I just so want that for other female athletes. And you know we’re seeing that there are more mentors, more representation, more access to viewing these formidable female athletes, and I hope that resonates.

V: Tessa, we’ve uh had the opportunity to work on a few branded campaigns together. There’s this Tessa grace, and there’s this element of everything being held to a certain standard. In everything that you do, especially things that are public facing. Talk to me a bit about that.

T: I hate the word brand but I’m going to say it, my brand has been

V: I mean you definitely have a very strong brand

T: Well it’s been built on the very foundation of me and my personality and if those values aren’t upheld in every sense of you know the word, then I’m I’m not useful to anyone. Then I’m then no brand would want to hire me, um because it if it gets diluted, then I then I just think um it’s losing the very essence of what resonates with people. And I’m really careful about that like I only partner and pair with brands that I would authentically stand behind and feel really good about promoting.  

V: I love that

T: And I’m conscious of where I lend my voice and my likeness, a very clear mission statement, and you know I love to be hands on but that’s where like the creative fulfilment comes in

V: Right

T: And honestly that’s where the most successful engagement also comes. If I’m involved and it’s a collaborative process, um it’s much more successful for the brand too.

V: You know, over this past year, there’s been such a strong connection to mental health and financial wellness. Many Canadians have a very high debt to income ratio, which can be very stressful. For you, how do you protect not only your mental health, but when it comes to financial wellness. How do you really protect your sanity?

T: As an amateur athlete I grappled with that um day after day. I think it’s important to find purpose in saving and planning. So, you know my mom started those conversations with me when I was young but that was all to sort of plant the seed of like you need to plan for this. And if you’re going to build something you need options in your life. For me you know it’s helped having a corporation for example, because a lot of my money is tied up there and it it’s great um but, it’s also made me very careful and strategic in how I spend it.

V: What is your one big piece of financial advice to all young women out there?

T: Surround yourself with the right people and set yourself up for independence.

V: I love that. Financial freedom.

T: Financial freedom.

[wizkiddx]

i saw that you at least used to write for harry could u do another? like maybe im just a basic bitch but 'only one bed' trope or sm

Summary: honestly just me shitty attempt at the only one bed thing ahah with Harry Holland x reader

no warnings I don’t think apart from my ramabling :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

God you were groggy. It had been a long 16 hour flight and you were well and truly completely over this day. Once you’d had some proper sleep, no doubt you will be beyond excited to explore the forest and beaches of this remote island in Indonesia. You were certain it was beautiful, even if you’d arrived in the dead of night so you couldn’t see any of the majesty yet. It was one of the joys of being Tom’s makeup artist - travelling the world and being paid for it? A literal dream. 

Except maybe the previous 24 hours. The Holland name carried a lot of weight in the world, but not enough to control typhoons across the tropics - there were some limitations to his power. And yes first class lounges were nice but none had beds to crash on during the 6 hour weather delay. The four of you (Tom, Harry, Andrew and yourself)  ended up camping out in a out-the-way corner. Tom got the long sofa; Andrew in one of those weird egg line chairs; you and Harry splayed on the floor. Why you’d had to get up at 4 am to catch a flight that was now not departing till 12 hours later actually hurt to think about - especially because you’d all gone out for a meal the night before that had inevitable went a lot later than planned. 

Two connecting flights with a very angry baby later, the four of you were checking in to the only hotel on the island - which was now almost exclusively filled with the production team for Tom’s newest movie. It wasn’t especially big-budget with massive million pound overheads, instead a smaller scale indie film (that you privately thought might earn Tom a number of accolades). But yeh, shooting on an island that received almost no tourism meant everything was different to the usual. None more so than for Tom and his team (including you) who he normally would look after very well, with the nicest hotel rooms or rental homes. 

The hotel was basic, you’d known that before you arrived but seeing is believing is it not? Most entertaining though, was seeing Tom’s face. Andrew was a well travelled older guy, he had stayed in some shitholes in his life. Equally you and Harry had both travelled when you were younger (you through inter railing and him in australia), so had stayed in hostels before. But for Hollywood star Tom Holland? The way he tilted his head to the side as if to say ‘really this place?’ did lift your spirits momentarily. 

Andrew had got his key first, bidding you all good night with a grunt, then Tom - who still seemed confused as to the whole arrangements. It left you and Harry at the small dingy reception, the warm glow of an old lantern-esque light fixing illuminating the place. The guy behind the desk was a smiley local and greeted you warmly, if incorrectly.

“Ah and finally the couple I see!” He spoke with a thick accent but still very clear English which had you questioning if this was just a translational error. Harry looked at you instantly, his eyes wide which made you scoff - him joining in, shaking his unruly curly mop emphatically.

“No no we um… we aren’t together.” All the while Harry pointed between the two of you, communicating through actions rather than just the language, given that you were both the very typical Brits abroad who hadn’t learnt the language of the place they were visiting. 

“Still under Holland name?” The guy asked in a perplexed manner, flicking through a book filled with cursive scribbles and scanning to see if he’d made a mistake. He checked one, then looked up nervously before checking the same page once again- you saw where this was going. ”We, we only have couples room down for you though? 3 double rooms is the booking for Holland.” 

It was late, you both stunk of a combination of plane and BO, you both just wanted your individual and respective beds. 

“Well can we get another room then?” Harry didn’t quite snap but there was still an impatientcy to his voice, which came out whenever he was a little agitated. Seeing the slightly worried look the mans eyes, you leaned onto the desk with a genuine smile. 

“Sorry we know its last minute and its not your fault, we’ve just had a really long flight.”

“I am terribly sorry miss but we are only small hotel and Hollywood has filled us up. I have no other rooms. I am truly sorry sir, ma’am.” The guy went from looking worried to terrified as Harrys jaw tensed up, you naturally squeezed his arm to try and ground him, instantly deciding that you’d just work it out. 

“No no it’s not your fault, don’t worry we’ll figure it out. Can I just get the key?”

Harry stepped back and let youtakeover proceedings, signing all the insurance documents etc and asking the man about the breakfast arrangements and such, though you saw him furiously typing on his phone and by the buzzing in your pocket- presumed he was messaging the group of you Tom, Andrew and himself. 

Once finished the guy pointed you on your way, up two flights of stairs and down a hall. The whole time Harry was muttering about how useless the other two were for not replying and also for making the wrong booking in the first place. If only you hadn’t been the last two to checkin, then it would’ve been someone else’s problem.

He felt especially guilty just because you were the only girl-  he didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable, hence why he was trying to locate his brother so they could share tonight till they got it figured out. The tension, combined with sleep deprivation, was palpable as you both walked in silence toward the room - Harry was trying to formulate a plan in his head as they did so. And honestly? You just couldn’t be bothered to deal with it. So, once you reached the door 57 holding the physical key (old school, rather than a key card) you just decided to address it. 

“Will you chill please?” 

“Well if my idiot broth-“

“Oh leave him be for god sake. If you’re okay with it I really don’t mind sharing with you tonight?” Not bothering to laugh at his slightly shocked expression with mouth hanging a little open, you fiddled with the key until the lock clicked open. From the entrance you had a pretty clear view of the whole room and… well, lets just say dated would be a fair expression - when compared to what you were used to? The floor was tiled and the bed was a small double, with some funky and slightly washed out prints of blue and red on the cover. The pillows looked a little limp, more like glorified pieces of cardboard than anything fluffy and comfortable. The walls were that yellowy magnolia shade that everyone in the UK had gone insane for in the 80s and there was an old school wooden wardrobe in the corner. 

Home for 5 weeks. 

With a shrug of your shoulders you entered, dumping your personal and work suitcases by the far wall carelessly - the higher priority action being to collapse on the bed. Doing so with an overdramatic huff, you let your eyes close but payed special attention to the delayed footsteps of Harry as he entered, then the slight creaking noise as he perched on the other side of the bed - no doubt looking at you, at least slightly fearfully. 

The relationship between you and Harry was complex to say the least. Well no… it should be, not on the face of it. You had met through work and made friends. And you wished it was that simple but alas, nothing ever really is. When you’d first worked with Tom you were in the tail end of a relationship you had long since forgotten about - literally meaningless, not worth the time and effort you’d put into it. From the start you’d had a feeling Harry was more interested in you than the average co-worker (even if your job and therefore co-workers were anything but normal and average) but you were in a relationship so nothing ever came. 

Then almost as if synchronised, just as you got out your relationship, Harry threw himself in the deep end with a girl he’d met through his family friends. Then the roles were somewhat reversed, you now spent a good chunk of your day just entertaining yourself with thoughts of the curly headed, slightly awkward, very-passionate-about-tea-making Holland. The cliche is so real - your always want what you cannot have. 

However, a couple months ago his relationship had fizzled and faded away leaving both of you in a sort of no mans land. The sort of not wanting to ruin the friendship situation. The subject was never broached by either you - except you assumed he was being tormented in a similar way to how you were by his big brother and Andrew. Never publicly, yet whenever you found yourself alone in a room with one of them (being Tom’s makeup artist that happened often enough) there would always be a sly dig. The chemistry was  so ‘obvious even a blind man could see it’. Somehow though, weeks of this and your were still stuck. Stuck in the middle. 

“You sure you’re alright with this?” His voice was gruffer and hoarser from the long journey but you could hear the self-consciousness and naivety in his tone, without having to peel your eyes open and look at his face. 

“I know your not a murder and plus, we shared the airport floor this morning… this is pretty much the same.” He hummed in acknowledgement so you carried on “and plus your pint sized.” That earned you a playful shove in the side as you sniggered, before pulling yourself up so you we now sitting next to him, legs hanging off the edge of the bed. His brown eyes searched deeply into yours, as if physically checking for any hint of regret or hesitation. “Don’t even dare offering to go on the floor.” 

“Okay okay okay!” Holding his hands up in surrender, you both laughed, breaking the peace of the late night of the remote Indonesian island. Once an impressive yawn interrupted you though, Harry proclaimed it was time for bed and shooed you into the bathroom to get changed and sorted. 

Honestly you were too tired and lazy to dig out your cleanser and skin stuff, instead opting to just splash a bit of water on your face before swapping into your pj shorts and an old tattered oversized tee. Once done you and Harry swapped, him coming out a couple minutes later in basketball shorts and a black loose fitting tee. 

It wasn’t awkward so to speak, more a sort of excited-tense atmosphere, which there was no doubt Harry was mainly responsible. The boy was jittery and on edge, which to put simply, you didn’t have the energy to reciprocate. 

With a quiet wish of goodnight to each other, Harry flicked off the bedside lamp and you both rolled to your respective edges of the bed, a large space of no mans land between you. In the middle. You know the first time you share a room with someone and you overthink everything? When you don’t want to move about or fidget too much in case it disturbs the other? When your listening intently to their breathing, in the hope it’ll even out and only then will you feel able to fall asleep yourself? 

Well it doesn’t work when both of you are doing it. When both of you are professional over thinkers. 

God knows how long it took till you gave up, favouring sleep over your worries and concerns. So you flipped over, no doubt rocking the whole bed, turning to face his back that was still huddled almost teetering off the edge of the bed. The only light within the whole room was that coming under the actually scarily large gap between the floor and the door to the hallway. It was just enough to see the back of Harry’s curls and you must’ve fallen asleep trying to trace all the torturous and windy routes of the strands.

///////////

In the morning the process of waking up didn’t come easy to you as normal for many reasons; the long day prior; the jet lag; the weird surroundings. So you stayed in this sort of blissful haze for probably longer than you should. Half aware but not really; half asleep but not quite. In the middle  of sleep and alertness. Therefore it took you longer than it should have to notice the extra weight on the dip of your waist. Not anything alarming, just a presence you were absolutely not used to. It was only when you shifted a bit to lie further on your back, that enough of a stimulus from the added pressure made you actually open your eyes blearily. And sure enough, a limp hand looked to have casually and unconsciously been thrown over your side. 

As if in slow motion, you traced the arm backwards - first with your eyes, but then having to twist your neck too. Only then could you fully see the browny ginger haired boy who was lowkey spooning you? It was certainly a way to fully wake you up, breath halted to a stand still in your lungs, in fear of disturbing him and having to confront what would almost certainly be an awkward situation. 

There was still a safe hands width distance between the two of you except for the rogue arm. Harry’s head was placed to the edge of his pillow, mouth slightly parted as his breathing slightly tickled the wispy hairs on the back of your neck. He looked so peaceful and calm - a difference to the normal Harry who, even on a good day, took great pleasure in meticulously picking things apart and being a bit cynical. It was part of his ‘charm’; but seeing him like this was a type of vulnerability he rarely chose to show. 

To be fair he was asleep, he dint realise he was exposing himself in this way.

Finding yourself a little transfixed (a bit creepy but hey) on the natural curves and definition of his face, you ever so carefully rolled over in the bed to face him. It stopped you from craning your neck and gave the sleepy boy a slight nudge, making him tense his arm a little more tightly round you. 

He settled quickly though, giving you ample opportunity to just observe what was going on . Both right in front of you… and what the hell was going on in your head. Because to be honest it was an overwhelming amount of emotion thoughts for the early morning. 

Somehow you must’ve eventually drifted off once again because the next thing you were aware of was a shuffling from immediately next to you. This time though, you were instantly aware of exactly the situation you found yourself in and chose to keep up the pretence of sleep - a little interested in how Harry would play it. 

You heard a small gasp, having to suppress a chuckle at what you imagined Harry’s sleepy and panicked face looked like. That lasted a couple of moments, before you felt him painstakingly slowly peel his hand from your waist and if you were being 100% honest… you heart sort of sank. 

What you had been expecting?- you don’t know and really there was really no reason to be disappointed. Yet, you still felt this deflated and disappointed feeling, hit your chest especially hard. Perhaps it was because of your focus on that emptyness that you forgot you were supposed to be pretending to be asleep./.

Because when he had delicately brushed the side of your face to tuck a rogue bit of hair behind your ear - your eyes flickered open.  Like a rabbit caught in headlights, Harry froze, his hand still hovering over your jaw. Equally, you didn’t know what to do. Because really… do friends tuck hair behind the others ears? And do friends look at each other with this matched expression of confusion and fear? 

It took a painfully long time (though in reality was probably only a matter of seconds) before the boy retracted his hand, suddenly sitting up from his reclined position down at you. Mirroring his actions, you both ended up sitting, facing the opposite wall, bodies closer than they needed to be in the double bed. Both still very much in the middle. 

“I er-“

“-No no don’t… was nice of you” He had been about to apologise which you didn’t want to hear. You didn’t want to hear ‘ I didn’t mean it’ - you wanted him to mean it. In response Harry nodded jerkily, and from your peripheries, noticed he was searching your face for any sign of emotion.

“Still can’t believe this all happened… I-I didn’t disturb you too much did I?” He sounded really nervous. You were never like this with each other. So static and forced. 

“No no… I slept really good actually.” Your register was quieter, waiting till you’d finished speaking before looking over at him with a self conscious smile. 

“Ah I’m glad… I um-I did too.” The silence returned and the atmosphere just felt sharp. It felt like you were quite literally walking either side of a knife edge. It made you chew on your bottom lip, playing with the slightly frayed edges of the vintage quilt. 

“Y/n- I look…” He’d bolted upright and voice was more raised than normal for the morning. “This is gonna sound so fucking weird, especially cos we’re literally in the same bed but... but I was thinking we could maybe go on a hike or something together?” What he seemed to be suggesting didn’t match the level of panic that was conveyed in his body language which confused you. And what the bed had to do with it… was yet to make sense in your head. 

“I think Andrew said we’re getting some tour of island this afternoon so-“

“ I kinda meant just you and me.” 

The penny dropped and it had you focusing all energy on processing what was happening - understandably causing Harry to only worry more with the lack of response. “I’m sorry if I’ve ruined ever-“

“No I-I….I’d really like that too.”

“Oh er… well… really?” The sheer shock made you giggle, feeling the two of you sliding back into the normal dynamic.

“Normally a boy has to buy me a drink before he gets in my bed but….” A mischevious smirk that spread across your lips gave Harry the final confirmation that just maybe you were interested too, making him scoff and quietly chuckle.

It was odd; mainly because this was the two of you being incredibly vulnerable and honest with each other - something that you hadn’t allowed yourself to be for fear of messing things up. And then one lazy morning, both with morning breath and slightly puffy eyes, it changed. For the first time when you looked at him, he really saw - and vice versa. You were still in the middle of something, yet it was completely different. 

This time you were in the middle together figuratively as well as literally. In the middle of the bed, closer than you needed to be, but not wanting to retreat - while you both just looked shyly and bashfully at each… Eventually you lips hesitantly met in the middle. 

[liums]

Jade SSR Halloween ( Scary Outfit ) Personal Story - Could you teach me?

Could you teach me?

Jade Leech SSR haloween card “Scary Outfit” personal story- Could you teach me?

As I was translacting I was also reading the story for the first time, so any comment I wrote, i wrote them without knowing what would happen next.

Part 1

-Classroom-

Ruggie- Reached the bill..

Kalim- I’ll ask Jade, somehow it should be possible!

Jade- Kalim, this is a rule. No exeptions are allowed.

Silver- *sleeps*

Floyd- I’m tired of this~

Floyd- Jellyfish (Silver) is also sleeping. Goldfish (Riddle) , do something interesting.

Riddle- Why me!? You should go somewhere else, Floyd.

Ruggie- Wow, they sure are lively. Are you guys busy?

Jamil- Me and Silver are just escorts. Don’t worry about us.

Kalim- Wait a little longer Ruggie. I’m talking to Jade about my budget.

Jade- Kalim. As I said many times, the budget is unnegotiable. Please take some things out. (I can feel Jade patience slowly going away)

Kalim- Don’t say that, Jade. If the show is flashy, the visitors will be pleased, right?

Riddle- Kalim, every dorm has a budget. I’ll have you follow the rules since Scarabia is no diferent.

Ruggie- I’ll finish my business here right away. Jade here, my budget aplication.

Jade- Yes, sure....Mr. Kalim, please follow Savanaclaw example.

Jade- You see, it’s perfectly within the budget.

Silver- *sleeps* (like the angel he is)

Jamil- Silver was tired of waiting and fell asleep....Kalim, let’s go home and reconsider.

Kalim- Hmmm....ok. Oh,but hey, did everyone talk about costumes and decorations?

Ruggie- Ours has already been decided. This year’s theme is pirates.

???- Ah, that’s a noisy theme.

Jamil- Azul , you came too.

Azul- yeah, when I passed in front of the classroom, it seemend to be very exiting.

Jade- The ghosts of the pirates who ransacked the sea in search of of treasures, and left behind numerous legends..... it’s certainly scary.

Ruggie- I don’t think that Jack, who had the idea, thought so much about it.

Ruggie- I think it suits Savanaclaw since we have a lot of physical strenght.

Floyd- Good, perfect for halloween.

Kalim- By the way, is there a Halloween event in the sea?

Jade- Why yes, of course. Every year at this time, we collect shellfish and starfish for decoration,

Jade- On the day we fill a bottle with luminous weeds and have a luminous party....like lanterns. And we carry them arround.

Floyd- We also play lively songs with instruments.

Kalim- Good! Music is always needed on banquets and festive days.

Jamil- I’m sure that the shape and tone of the musical instruments in the sea are different from those on land.

Silver- Carrying a lantern for a night light party is also an interesting costom unique to the sea. (oya, the sleeping beauty woke up)

Riddle- Yup, It looks like it would be an amazing sight.

Azul- I’m honored everyone is interested in our hometown costoms.

Azul- If you wish, we will make a tour package and guide you during the holidays. 

Jade- It looks very fun, but let’s talk about it in another time.

Jade- Well. As you say, Halloween on land and on the sea is quite different.

Jade- I have been amazed with cultural differences since we came to land.

Jade- There are many things I don’t know yet. To live up to the expectations as one of the steering committee members,

Jade- I would like to deepen my understanding of the Halloween on land.

Jade- Can you tell me what kind  of Halloween you were having in your hometowns?

Part 1 end

Silver couldn’t keep his eyes open during the whole scene, that boy is precious XD

Part 2

- classroom-

Jade-  Can you tell me what kind  of Halloween you were having in your hometowns? (Jade pls don’t ask that to these poor kids, Riddle? lets not talk about it, Jamil, probably spent the whole day on the kitchen cooking because kalim was too busy partying, and silver??? the poor boy always got spooked by Lilia non-stop all night )

Riddle- ....Halloween?

Riddle-  In my hometown, it seems to be standard for children to gather in the plaza and “have fun together”.

Jamil- It seems like .... you are talking  as if it is someone else’s problem.

Riddle- I only participated once. So I’m not familiar with it....

Riddle- What impressed me is that we all did “Apple Bobbing”

Floyd- Goldfish, apple bobbing.....what is it? It’s has an interesting name.

Riddle- You fill a large tub with water and apples, and you have to grab the apples with you mouth. Of course , you can’t use your hands.

Jade- That is ....a game unique to land.

Azul- Yes, as soon as you take your hand off the apples under the sea, they’d rise to the surface immediately.

Jade- If it were a game to chase the suddenly rising apple, it could be done even under the sea.(I’m pretty sure he said this to tease Azul)

Floyd- That might be unexpectedly interesting.

Silver- However, an apple....can you really get it with just your mouth?

Riddle- It is usually done with small apples....but its still difficult. (say that to the tweels and their sharp ass teeth)

Jade- Its a game in which  well-build children have the advantage to grab the apple.

Riddle- Yeah. Not only the size of the mouth but also jaw strenght is required.

Ruggie- If we did it in this school wouldn’t Jade and floyd be super advantageous at this game then?

Ruggie- Their body is big. And the teeth are sharp.

Jade- (*angelic smile*) Kufufufu What about it? Opening my mouth wide in front of everyone would be embarassing...

Jade- I may not the able to take the apple because I hesitaded to catch it. ( yes yes, i’ll try to belive you)

Floyd- How do you decide who wins or loses this game?

Riddle- I think the rule was that the person who gets the apple in the shortest amount of time would win.

Riddle- It seems that even in Wonderland this game is played in some areas. ( i didn’t understand what he said, he said” Kiseki no kuni” wich translates to Land of Miracles\wonders, so I assumed he was talking about wonderland)

Riddle- Cater once challanged me on  “How many can we get”.

Riddle- I couldn’t get the hang of it ,so my face and clothes got soaked in water....

Riddle- When I think about it now, the result isn’t that important.

Riddle- We laugh and make noises as we try to get the apples. I think that is the main purpose.

Jade- Certainly. It is very interesting the sight of Riddle desperately opening his mouth and chasing apples...

Jade- No, It seems to be worth watching.

Riddle- What do you mean?

Kalim- I understand what Riddle is saying. It’s more important to have fun than to win or lose!

Riddle-Oh...Thats right.

Kalim- Its a bit different from my kingdom, but the Halloween in the Land of Hot Sands is really fun!

Jade- Oh, is there a special characteristic about the Halloween in the Land of Hot Sands? 

Kalim- No, the halloween in the land of hot sands its a “treat banquet”! 

Kalim- It’s bacause in my country, talking arround the banquet is the most enjoyable thing.

Kalim- So when it’s halloween time, we prepare as many dishes as you can put on the table.

Jamil- So that the ghosts who have returned, can eat as much as they want.... together.

Jamil-  We prepare a large range of sweets, salty foods, spicy foods....from light foods to large dishes.

Jamil- When Halloween is near, the kitchen is always at full capacity,starting with the preparation of the ingredients.

Jade- Someday I would like to see susch magnificent banquet. Do you have any traditional dishes?

Kalim- Speaking of haloween treats....I like that

Kalim- It’s a dish that has baked vegetables and sauce on top of each other.

Jamil- so? go on? ( His expression is 5* XD, he be like”I’m not payed enough for this...., but then again,I’m not paid”)

Kalim- Oh,That face is definitely pinpoiting, you see, the ingredients are potatoes, eggplants and tomatoes!

Jade- ..........So it’s like lasagna, but it replaces the pasta with vegetables?

Kalim- Oh, that’s close. When it’s freshly baked its really delicious.

Azul- So that’s it. It seems to be preferred by healthy-minded owners.

Jade-Jamil, can you tell me the name of the dish?

Jamil- Its....Moussaka, it’s a local dish. (It really exits, I looked it up)

Kalim- Oh yeah. That’s it!

Kalim- When I was a kid, and I really wanted to eat it even though it wasn’t banquet day, I’d ask Jamil to make it.

Jamil- It was terrible at that time. My parents and other servants scolded me....“Don’t use fire when you are alone!”

Kalim- Eh!? Is that so !?

Jamil- I was still in elementary school.

Jamil- I didn’t cook as much as I do now...It would have been bad if I had started a fire.

Jamil- Now I can understand, why my parents and the other servants were angry with me.

Kalim-Oh, I’m sorry.

Kalim- But the Moussaka I ate that time was really delicious. I still remeber it well.

Kalim- Now that I remembered it, I want to eat it again. Hey Jamil, Please make it again!

Azul- Please one for me as well. I’d like to include it in Mostro Lounge new menu....

Jamil- I don’t want that.

Kalim- Well, don’t say that~

Jamil- Moussaka is a time-consuming dish that requires 2 kinds of sauces because it requires many ingridients.

Jamil- I don’t think it suitable to be served in a cafe.

Jade- So it’s cooked in a oven, isn’t it.

Jade- The ovens at Mostro lounge aren’t that big....is it really so hard to produce it in big quantities?

Azul- Isn’t there any way to increase the production quantity by making them all together on a big oven?

Ruggie- Octavinelle is still the same.

(I wonder what Riddle and floyd have been doing this entire time, Silver is probably sleeping)

Jade- Fufufu...For more information, let´s eat jamil’s home cooking, and then discuss this again.

Jamil- Wait a minute, I don’t want to make....so many.

Silver- *Sleeps* (oya oya I was right 0.0)

Jamil- You see, Silver fell asleep again while you guys from Octavinelle were exited about the profits.

Jade- Oops, I’m sorry for this. We devianted from the subject.

Jade- Mr.Silver, excuse me. Would you like to wake up?

Silver- Ah...I’m sorry. Was it about the Halloween in the Valley of Thorns?

Jade- Yes, please tell us your story.

Silver- About halloween, I can only remember that my father-....that Lilia was enthusiastic and disguised. ( he corrected himself by sayng LIlia instead of parents because Lilia asked him not to call him his parent while with being with other students, so it wouldn’t be strange for silver, Lilia and malleus are his guardians)

Riddle- By the way, the 2 were in the same town.

Jade- After all people disguise themselfs in the valley of thorns... Disguise is a common custom in every Country isn’t it?

Silver- Don’t the mermaids use disguises too?

Jade- I don’t have the habit of wearing clothes on a daily basis.

Jade- It’s fun to dress in various ways on land because I’m not familiar with it.

Silver- In fact, disguises are not a fun memory. Even as I recall now, it’s horrifying.

Floyd- Eh, wasen’t Mandako-chan (Lilia) smaller than now when it happened?

(Mandako is an octopus, also known as Opisthoteuthis Californiana, look it up and u will see why Floyd calls Lilia this XD)

Silver- Oh, he looked the same as now....

Silver- But the only time I saw such terrifying appearence of Lilia was on that halloween.

Jade- That’s interesting. He is a very cute person, as he is pround of.

Silver- The frighteningness of Lilia disguised is scary... 

Silver- I would tremble with Sebek as I was watching with him

Silver- That night was so frightening that the two of us promised that we would definitely stay up until morning.

Jade- If I get this scared, I’m sure I’ll cry out lound.

Floyd- Well, now I want to see. I have been with you since we were born , but I have never seen that.

Ruggie- So, why did you and Sebek pray in tears for the morning to come?

Silver- Oh no....I fell asleep middle way without noticing.

Riddle- After everything.....

Silver- Sebek couldn’t dare going to the bathroom all night, in the next morning he was angry with me and  I was called “Traitor!”

Ruggie- Hey, seems like Sebek also has a cute side.

Jamil- So, how was halloween where you lived?

Ruggie- Me? The story of Halloween in the slums isn’t very interesting.

Jade- Well, I don’t think so. Everything about land is fresh and interesting, so please tell me.

Ruggie- Its okay to talk separately,... but don’t listen and pull. 

Ruggie- “Trick or treat”.....Isn’t it normal to be mischievous if you don’t receive a treat?

Ruggie- But my usual Halloween isn’t that cute.

Ruggie- If you don’t give me a treat, I’ll not go home until you give me some....24 hours endurance. It was a treats collection event.

Part 2- end

Lilia really did tromatize the poor kids....poor Sebek was left alone XD

Part 3

-Classroom-

Silver, Kalim and Riddle- 24 HOURS ENDURANCE TREAT COLLECTION EVENT!?

Jade- Sweets collection...It seems like something you usually do on Halloween but....

Jade- From what Mr.Ruggie just said it seems this one quite different.

Ruggie- That’s righ. Because treats are a thing we rarely eat.

Ruggie- Just say “Trick or Treat” and you will get sweets for free.

Ruggie- There’s no way that hyenas will miss out this change to eat.

Jade- Mr.Ruggie, when you come to Mostro Lounge,(Ruggie works there sometimes to get money)

Jade- You bring a storage container with you.

Jade-Does that mean that your appetite for food hasn’t changed?

Ruggie- I gathered the children from the neighborhooh, we decided the area they were in charge, and toured the village.

Ruggie- ....Not missiong one single house.

Jamil- That is a tremendous obsession....

Ruggie- If my appearence changes, I’ll get sweets again, so we changed the group members and went to the same houses many times. (When I leaded trick or treat groups I did this too XD)

Silver- If you go that far....It seems to be a problem.

Ruggie- You see, many years ago, our operation got caught by the caretaker of the neighborhood association....

Ruggie- We were charged with “Trick or treat ban” righ away.

Jade- How sad. Didn’t everyone get disapointed?

Ruggie- That’s right. I was a kid too, so I greedily made a mistake by pushing it too far.

Ruggie- I was the most anoyed since I was like a big brother to the children of the local area.

Jade- I was wondering what you were talking about earlier, but Mr.Ruggie is surprisingly good at taking care of children.

Jade- I had the impression that you only do it when there is a reward....

Ruggie-.....Well, let’s leave that matter aside.

Ruggie- My grandma would do pumpkin pie, for the children who were sick.

Riddle-Pumpkin pie....it seems delicious.

Jade- We have a new candidate for the Halloween manu

Ruggie- Ah, it’s a secret recipe that only the Bucchi family knows, so if you ask me for it, it won’t be cheap. Shishishi!

Jade- As expected , Mr Ruggie is astute.

Jade- It looks better than cookies and muffins, and above all, it shoud be satisfying to eat.

Ruggie- Of course. I was sick. But it wasen’t gorgeous.

Ruggie- The pumpkin pie was made from Jack-o-Lantern’s  hollowed-out contents.

Jade-.....I would have never thought of that way to use it

Ruggie- So, from the next year, I started a part-time job to make Jack-o-Lantern for pumpkin pie.

Azul- You really have experienced various part-time jobs...I’m impressed.

Ruggie- A job where a free bite from the pumpkin pie was provided to the client for free.

Ruggie- You could take the hollowed out contents for free...

Ruggie- Isn’t that amazing !? It sure feels like it is. Haloween, banzai !

Jade- Amazing! I should take those business guts as an example.

Silver- ....Everyone has enjoyed the Halloween in different ways.

Kalim- Yes, Let’s enjoy Halloween at the school and make good memories!

Floyd- Enjoy it to you heart’s content?

Azul- Good memories....?

Kalim- ......? Don’t you enjoy Halloween?

Jade- It wasen’t an event with that meaning for us mermaids from the sea of the north

Jade- Those who die in the sea often have regrets and despair.

Jade- Those who were devoured by a storm, those who lost the route to their destination and died on board....

Jade- In any case, it is not uncommon for the returning ghosts to be ferocious.

Azul-  Yeah, defeating the ghosts of the sea usually comes first.

Jamil- Didn’t you just say “ The Halloween is celebrated with  lanters party and bright music”?

Floyd- The lanters are a landmark to prevent the mermaids from accidentally going to the ghost world. 

Floyd- Playing music is also to keep the ghosts calmer.

Azul-  It also seems that there is the intention to calm toughts and sadness.

Riddle- .....There are ghosts all over the ocean?

Jade- I haven’t seen them but....

Jade- During Halloween school would even send home a notice.

Jade- Places you shouldn’t approach, times you shouldn’t go out, etc....Every year, there are missing people (0.0)

Ruggie- Wait a minute....that’s too scary.

Floyd- Come to think of it. When I was in middle school, I think I saw three Jade in different places~.

Jade-I tought I was talking to floyd once, but the next day I remember he told me “I haven’t heard that”.

Jade- I didn’t really notice at the time that it wasen’t him....

Azul- It was Halloween.Such things happen. 

Jamil- That sort of thing...

Silver-The sea is a terrifying world that we can’t imagine....

Jade- At the sea’s Halloween, you can enjoy thrills that you wouldn’t normally experience.

Floyd- Well, you won´t get bored~

Azul- As Mr.Ruggie mentioned earlier, I’m proud that there are many business opportunities!

Jade- Aside from Azul’s work, I like the Halloween event, whether by sea or on land.

Jade- I’m exited to think of what kind of unexpected things will happen.

Jade- I was selected as a steering committee member, and I would like everyone on land to experience a different feeling than usual.

Jade- We can deliver a different kind of thrill because we are from the sea.

Jade- Let’s have a darker Halloween this year, which will be second to none. Fufufu....

Jade- Happy Halloween

END

So, what did we learn? sTAY AWAY FROM THE SEA AT HALLOWEEN

wow, so much lore in Jade’s personal story

Add me if u want uwu

Disclaimer- I don’t own Twisted wonderland or any of its characters, This is a Fan translaction therefore it’s not oficial 

[dramaruni]

@bpdaf so this answer opened a can of worms (that I can call procrastination) and I wanted to address it, but with the limited characters in the reply function, I decided to answer it with a new post. Also sorry if this come as an attack, I promise it's not. I just became really curious if I had the wrong idea about the live-shooting system as I was ready to refute your points, but realized I didn't have enough knowledge to do so.

*also tagging @jahe, @yasmini24, @le-amarant as they also replied to my post and I figured maybe you were also interested in this (although it's really long and rambly, so I don't blame you for ignoring the post entirely). So yeah warning, this post is really long.

So I'm well aware of kdrama's live shoot system. But I did wonder if it was normal to start shooting 6 months before the first airing episode, as I was under the impression 6 months of shooting exceeded the standard duration of filming. But I couldn't actually refute it without some data to back that up. So I went to find data.

According to Wikipedia's page on Korean Dramas, they write: “As producing a series involves high expenses, production companies seek to shoot the episodes in the shortest time possible. In contrast to practices elsewhere, the first four episodes of Korean series are usually shot in advance, but the rest are shot continuously as the series is being aired.”

This fits in line with what I believed about Korean dramas live shooting system. They film a couple of episode ahead of time and then rest comes while it's still airing to fit with the audience response to it. Even preproduced dramas are sometimes reshot and re-edited while it's airing. But it didn't really say anything about the average filming duration for a drama or what shortest time possible was defined as. Probably because all dramas will aim for different things and given the content it can vary a lot how long it takes to film.

But I highly doubt it took Vincenzo 6 months to shoot something around 4 episodes and then crammed the rest into the 2 remaining months, as they knew from the start they had 20 episodes to fill.

So let's go through some other drama's shooting schedule to compare with Vincenzo.

I chose to limit the list to 2020 dramas (as they were likely affected by the pandemic) and tvN dramas, so it's the same broadcasting company as these dramas will likely share the same practices. Obviously with the amount I have included, I can't make any definite conclusions, but it does show a pattern.

*disclaimer I tried my best to accurately determine the shooting duration from when filming started to when it ended, but not all of these dramas had that information readily available, so I made do with the information I had at hand. This means some of these are just estimations.

So without further ado, here's the list:

Vincenzo:

May 2020, Director Kim Hee Won and writer Park Jae Bum teamed up.

July 2020, Song Joong Ki and Jeon Yeo Bin were considering the drama, while Ok Taecyeon had confirmed

September 2020, filming started

February 20th, 2021 first episode aired

No episodes April 17thand18th

April 17th, last episode script delivered

April 23rd, filming wrapped

May 2nd, 2021 last episode aired

Shooting time: 8 months

Shooting duration before first aired episode: 6 months

Filming wrapped before last airing episode: 8 days

1. Crash Landing on You

*not affected by the COVID-19 Pandemic * includes overseas filming

July 31st, 2019 – first script reading

End of august 2019, filming overseas begin

December 14th, first episode airs

January 12th, filming wrapped

February 16th, 2020 last episode airs

Shooting time: 5 months

Shooting duration before first aired episode: 4 months

Filming wrapped before last airing episode: 1 month + 4 days

2. It’s okay not to be okay

I couldn’t find the exact time shooting started, so these numbers are based between March and May, as I assume they didn’t shoot without Oh Jung Se being casted and while the table read photos were released in May, it could very well be they had started shooting before this.

February 2020 Kim Soo Hyun and Seo Ye Ji casted

March 2020 Oh Jung Se casted

May 8th 2020, first script reading photos released

June 20th 2020, first episode aired

July 31st 2020, filming wrapped

August 9th 2020, last episode aired

Shooting time: 3-5 months

Shooting duration before first aired episode: 1-3 months

Filming wrapped before last airing episode: 9 days

3. Start-up

August 4th, all the leads are confirmed for casting

September 2020, promotional starts to come out

October 17th 2020, First episode aired

November 21st 2020, Bae Suzy wraps up filming (assuming filming wraps up around the same time as her as she is the lead)

December 6th, last episode aired

Shooting time: 2-4 months

Shooting duration before first aired episode: 1-2 months

Filming wrapped before last airing episode: around 15 days

4. Hospital playlist season 1

*only aired 1 episode pr. week

October 2019, principal photography took place

March 12th, first episode aired

Late April 2020, filming wrapped

May 28th 2020, last episode aired

Shooting time: 7 months (couldn’t find when they actually started shooting, so let’s just pretend they also filmed around October)

Shooting duration before first aired episode: 6 months

Filming wrapped before last airing episode: 1 month

5. A piece of your mind

February 7th 2020, article of the first script reading

February 13th, first photos from drama unveiled

March 23rd, first episode aired

April 8th 2020, tvN announces that 4 episodes are cut due to low ratings

April 28th, last episode aired

Shooting time: 2-4 months

Shooting duration before first aired episode: 1-2 months

Filming wrapped before last airing episode: N/A (couldn’t find the exact time but they also axed four episodes and I don't know how much that affected filming)

6. Psychopath diary

*not affected by the COVID-19 pandemic

August 2019, first script reading

November 20th, first episode aired

January 9th 2020, last episode aired

Shooting time: n/a

Shooting duration before first aired episode: 3-4 months (assuming they started shooting shortly after the first table read)

Filming wrapped before last airing episode: n/a

7. Stranger /Secret Forest season 2

* preproduced based on the information I found

January 2020, first script reading

June 20th, 2020 lead actors wrapped filming (But I only found this article that says this)

August 15th 2020, first episode aired

October 4th 2020, last episode aired

Shooting time: 6 months

Shooting duration before first episode aired: 6 months

Filming wrapped before last airing episode: 4-5 months

What does this mean?

So the drama that comes closest to Vincenzo's filming duration is Hospital Playlist, but they also did things a bit differently. According to their Wikipedia, they only aired 1 episode a week to comply with 52-hour week system and to avoid overnight filming for the cast's and crews' health. So that would extend their shooting time. They also had the same amount of shooting time as Vincenzo before the first episode aired, i.e. 6 months, but Hospital playlist was only 12 episode drama so they also had less content to fill.

The rest of these dramas has a shooting time with 6 months or less. I will say though a lot of these dramas are not action-packed (also I haven't checked the budget for any of these), so comparatively they probably have different needs when filming. The drama that comes closest in terms of action is Stranger/Secret Forest, and it's also pretty close in shooting time with only 2 month different (that's counting from the first table read though). This was however pre-produced so they wrapped up filming before the first episode even aired (if my information is correct). Also this was a season two so they were operating under a little different circumstances.

But with the exception of Stranger/Secret Forest (preproduced) and Hospital Playlist(tried to work with humane working hours), none of this drama has a 6-month filming duration before the first episode aired. In fact some of these dramas don't even exceed 6 months of filming. Meaning they had less time to shoot before the first episode aired. Their production was probably also lower and none them did CGI (although I haven't watched all of them so feel free to correct me if I'm wrong) as that should also be accounted for.

So 8 months of filming is a lot to allocate to a drama, at least it's not the norm. There are other dramas that exceed that filming time that didn't make the list (Mr. Sunshine sorry too much research for at this point), but obviously that is not the standard.

Obviously I don't know how the filming was divided, how many of the episodes they had filmed before the first one aired. I don't know how many of the episode scripts were written before it aired. But I can see that even with the live-shooting, Vincenzo has some very uneven scheduling that doesn't align with how the rest of these dramas did their scheduling and airing. None of the mentioned dramas had any delays (in airing, I can't be sure about filming as some of them are probably affected by the pandemic), and yet Vincenzo did, even though they had spent more time filming before the first episode aired.

Also, most of these dramas wrapped up filming with more than a week to spare before the final airing, with It's Okay Not To Be Okay coming the closest to the airing date (with the ones where I know the date when they finished shooting), but they also only had 1-3 months of filming before the drama actually started airing so much less time than Vincenzo. And although they didn't have CGI, they did have the animations for each of the fairytales which I don't know how long it took but I can imagine it took some time.

So then I looked up another drama not by tvN but by Park Jae Bum:

Good Manager/Chief Kim

December 15, 2016 first script reading

January 25, 2017 First episode aired

March 30, 2017 Last episode aired

I couldn't find the date they finished filming, but given they only started a month before airing (honestly I felt super sorry for the cast and crew when I saw these dates), I am assuming the hit the last airing date pretty closely with filming, and that would give them 3 months of filming roughly. And they also had 20 episodes like Vincenzo.

I haven't seen this drama myself, so I can't say anything about the writing quality, but here Park Jae Bum was working under even more time pressure and was able to deliver the ending on time and as I hear, it was pretty a pretty good ending (but I haven't seen it, so feel free to refute me). And yet he couldn't do it for Vincenzo. So I do think something happened with ending, whether it was Park Jae Bum just took a long time writing it for whatever reasons, or someone/thing (be it something personal, writer's block, execs not liking the ending etc.) actually interfered and that prolonged the writing or entirely changed the ending.

Anyway this became too long, so let me just end it here.

I wish I had time to make a more comprehensive list so I could be more definite in the conclusion because obviously I can't base everything of the schedule of 8 dramas that also vastly different in production quality, genre and content.

So yeah I might have just wasted the last three-four hours making something that doesn't even make sense. But hey, at least I'm less prepared for the exams now, good use of time. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[isagrimorie]

Spyfall 2

Commentators: Jodie Whittaker, Sylvie Briggs (Ada Lovelace), Chris Chibnall

Much like the Doctor doesn't like being alone, Jodie also isn't keen on doing scenes alone.

Chibnall actually did consult with his brother in law, who is very knowledgeable in aviation, about landing planes without a cockpit. And it is possible to do so remotely, people will be surprised how a lot of modern planes are actually flown by a computer. I'm not surprised, my dad's a pilot and he told me a lot of modern aircraft are actually flown more by the computers than the pilots. It's a two edged sword tho because then the pilot becomes too over reliant on the autopilot, and that's when accidents happen.

The scene with Ada and Thirteen meeting in the Kasaavin dimension was actually Sylvie's (Ada Lovelace) final day. Her first day was waking up in 'Paris' with Thirteen.

Interesting comment about how the Doctor's rhythm and speech changed dictated by the period of time she's in. It's modern but enough to sound period.

The hall the Doctor and Ada are in is a school, the dining hall.

The Master and his Top Hat! Jodie and Sylvie are both admiring how Sacha commanded the room and how genuinely terrifying he was. 'He (Sacha) rehearses in a way physically you kinda know what he's gonna do but emotionally its different.'

Jodie: "We're the same height, well you can see it 'cause we are but what is really ace is bein' able to eyeball somebody, because very often when you have a standoff with someone there's usually one's looking up, one's looking down or whatever but to be absolutely--"

Sylvie: "Because that changes the power dynamic."

Jodie: "Yeah."

Chibnall: "I never clocked that."

[snip]

Chibnall: "But I wonder if that's what makes it feels so much like your Master, your antagonist, your nemesis. It's like... that's interesting about the eyeline."

Jodie: "Cause in the scene obviously with Lenny outside like this (does something we can't see) and I like doing that thing of scrunching up and kind of, y'know, I suppose the.. doing that thing that kids do headstrong where the body leans forward. But with this two its (growls)."

Chibnall was uncertain about writing the kneel scene, Jodie agrees and didn't like it, Sylvie mentions that it feels epic to her. Chibnall:"There's something about your perfromances that makes it feel epic. But it's just that two-hander."

In the kneel scene, when they were filming, to keep the secret of the Master's identity, Jodie called Sacha 'Myka' instead of Master.

Jodie: "I like my bowtie." Chibnall: "Are you angling for the return of the bowtie?"

Jodie: "Every set, I try to knick something." LOL.

I love how Jodie compliments Sylvie, and I agree she fits the era very well. And an instance where costume (corset especially), and the hair all tied back helps get into character.

Ada really had episodes of paralysis, and one of the jumping off points for Chibnall's story.

Sylvie and Jodie comment on how lovely it was to have scenes with three women and not about 'Hey three women! Let's talk about being women! It's (their gender) is absolutely irrelevant to it but it is really lovely to have just three women. The kind of craziness Doctor Who brings with Ada in period clothes, the Doctor in a tux, and Noor in her period appropriate clothes.

They go on to discuss the Master's SS uniform and how it makes them (Sacha included) shudder because of what the uniform represented. And it's more of a reflection of the Master because he just treats wearing the SS uniform as a dress up without accounting for the implications and history of it. An alien tourist playing dress-up. [ED: I think the optics of this is still problematic I think it's something we need to acknowledge..]

There really was a point where Jodie and Sylvie were under the floor boards with people walking above them, and they held each other's hands because that experience was awful. On page it was very cool, but in execution. (Ed: I love that scene the whole way where there's a tense standoff between Noor and the soldiers, and the Master. And the steeliness of Noor just staring them down even with the soldier strafing the floor.) Chibnall wants several films with Noor Inayat Khan.

OMG. There was a point in the shoot where the Doctor was supposed to speak in perfect French, and Jodie joked that she already didn't speak English very well, and so she practiced speaking her line just to get the accent perfect... only for it to be cut for time. I WANT DELETED SCENES NOW.

Scanning through the Spyfall 2 script there's no mention of the scene where the Doctor speaks in French which really just confirms my suspicion that the scripts are not the shooting scripts, or at least the copies the actors use.

So, Chibnall gave the production several possible locations hoping to bring the budget to manageable scale and then he started writing and he got to the scene where the Doctor and Master spoke and the Master asked where they'd meet and then the Doctor answered; "Where d'you think?"

And Chibnall goes: "Oh they've got to meet in the Eiffel Tower. Production is going to kill me!"

Also, by this it confirms to me that Chibnall, like all of the showrunners is a Doctor/Master shipper, which I should've known already because Jack and Captain John were very much Doctor/Master lite.

Jodie loves doing duologues and is hoping for more two handers in the future, and Chibnall is taking note of that. Two handers where the other person has more of the dialogue... LOL. I guess Jodie really loved The Timeless Children.

[ED: Ada and Noor were such good companions. I want a historical companion for Thirteen next please. Thirteen, Yaz, and a historical Companion!]

Sylvie is so fascinated with the Doctor and Master's relationship, about how complicated it is.

One of the advises RTD gave Chibnall is that 'you can save anything in a line.' LOL. Apparently some of the Master's trauma across 77 years involved tailoring.

Jodie comments on how exciting it is being involved in the costuming, between herself and Sacha, they get to build their Doctors and Master's look and shape them. Also Jodie really loves cropped pants.

Jodie and Sylvie love the power walk, the big iconic, backlit smoke walk. The Big Exposition speech.

The scene where the Master arrives in Kasaavin dimension, same day filming for Jodie, and Sylvie too.

Jodie loves all the engineering and carpentry work, and any practical work.

They did do a shoot where they moved forward to a scene where Noor died, but in the edit found a better ending in the one that was broadcasted, and IMO, that was the right choice. Chibnall wants it more that Doctor Who will inspire people to read up more on Noor Inayat Khan and same Ada.

Chibnall didn't want to rob Ada of her agency, that the Doctor helped her discover computers or suggest that she didn't come up with it, everything Ada did she came up with herself.

The scene where Thirteen is alone and contemplating what happened to Gallifrey, Jodie comments how this was one of the few times where she's just very still.

Chibnall: "This is second series Thirteen, the place you take a character once you've done the first act, done in the beginning of your Doctor's second act."

Jodie and Sacha made sure that they're there in person for the scene in the TARDIS because having a stand-in would change the energy and performance of the scene.

Chibnall: "That performance from Sacha, the layer he brings to the Master there, of emotional truth and pain is so fantastic. It's a gift for a writer, and opens up the Master as well. And opens up your Doctor, I think, the trauma's so personal."

Hang on. Chibnall: "Is that the first appearance of the jumper? [ snip] They've come in this second series, its the first jumper. Little tiny changes you and Ray figure out." Are they implying there were more Doctor wearing only her long sleeve jumper we didn't get to see???

Chibnall: "And you got your Doctor theme but also it's the first time you [speaking to Jodie], it's interesting, I deliberately kept them back in the first series so that when you say them here, it's like you're saying 'Gallifrey', 'Kasterborous', 'Master for the first time."

Jodie: But its good that it ends with a: [using the same steely, angry voice]: 'Questions?' Like: 'Back to business, c'mon.'

Chibnall: (watching Thirteen's face subtly change when Yaz asked if they can visit, and it changes from a broken void to a forced smile). "Ohhhh. Why won't you tell them?" (LOL a writer asking his character.)

[uwua3]

Your writing is amazing! Like honestly! ✨ Can I request some yuki dating headcanons like with an s/o. If not I understand have a great day! 😊

thank you so much ♡ can i just say i love your support and enthusiasm for my writing 🥺 i always see you liking/replying to my posts and i am In Love With You i swear *thousands of hearts* thank you for everything~ but yes, of course! one super soft yuki hc coming up right away!!!

summary: yuki was yours and only yours, and he wanted to make sure everyone knew

author’s note: this was so sweet, it gave me multiple cavities! i’m sorry if it’s awkward, i’m not too experienced in the art of ~ love ~ even though i’m such a hopeless romantic! hope this was cute enough :D

i hope everyone knows relationships don’t make you whole, you are your own person. your s/o can help you improve to be the best version possible, but you are just as unique and interesting as an individual, never forget that ♡

word count: 1,803

music: Q&A – seventeen ft. ailee, hold your hand – lee hi

couple outfits.

🌻👘 rurikawa yuki

yuki didn’t just date anybody, let’s make that clear. in fact, yuki never dated anyone before you!

yuki liked you, so, so much. before he said anything, it physically hurt him to be so distracted by your presence when he had so many responsibilities

(it also hurt tenma when backstage, yuki forgot what he was doing and didn’t look where the needle was going when he became too entranced)

(“you idiot! stop staring at them for one second!” tenma yelped, not seeing yuki’s embarrassed blush before the two got caught in a petty argument once again. obviously, you had to play peacemaker)

but yuki was scared every time you looked at him and saw your stupid smile. you seemed so happy around him, and yuki could tell the signs before you even knew

you had to like him romantically, your hugs lingered and personality was made of sugar only around him

you were so obvious, you liked him and he was scared of messing everything up. it was so rare to find a good friend like you, was it worth it to risk everything?

before he even knew it, yuki was preparing a rejection because no person could come between him and his work (at least, that’s what he tried to reason it with)

but every time you looked at yuki, with all the affection in the world, he didn’t have the heart to say it

maybe, yuki didn’t want to say something he didn’t believe in

so the best solution was if he avoided the topic, you guys would be friends forever and nothing would have to go wrong

so when he confessed out of no where, yuki slapped his hands over his own mouth because he was such an idiot (for once)

you two were buying fabrics for the next mankai production, yuki happily browsing the store with the increased budget

yuki practically pulled you to the secluded corner, convincing you the store’s hidden gems were always in the piles of boxes about to be donated

when you found a discarded silk scarf hidden amongst the mixture, you looped it around your own neck and pretended like you were ali–baba, reciting the lines from water me! to get his attention

(you helped yuki practice his lines in the script so you were practically an understudy)

yuki already started ignoring your ridiculous tactics, about to tell you to shut up and help him find the perfect material when he turned around—you had it!

yuki rushed forward, unintentionally pulling you in close as he inspected the fabric’s qualities, not realizing how you were invading his personal space

“how did you even find this, you must be my...” yuki stumbled on his words, looking up to see you staring at him with such unmasked fondness, it made him become flustered

“your what?” you questioned, playfully smiling as you leaned forward, causing yuki to automatically pull back

(silly yuki! he forget he still had a death grip on the scarf as you followed him forward, holding out your arm on the wall nearby to prevent you two from falling)

yuki flinched, expecting the impact of the ground but opened his eyes to see you were leaning over him and was trapped between your arms

a beat of silence passed. yuki was about to let go before you moved in closer, innocently tilting your head as you had a cat–like cheshire grin

“tell me i’m yours, yuki~” you giggled, watching the way his face immediately turned red. any other person, he’d push off without a doubt. but he liked that you teased him so much, that you were so affectionate and open to him

yuki wish he didn’t like you so much

he knew you were joking, but,

yuki really did like you so much

“you’re mine. i want you to be mine.” yuki admitted, his expression forming one of shock as if he couldn’t believe what he said. how could he just confess that?! yuki shut his mouth, still against the wall as you blinked once. twice.

it didn’t take long before you fell back from laughter, bruising yuki’s ego as he crossed his arms and looked away, embarrassed

this is what he got for trying to be spontaneous and “in the moment”. yuki didn’t know what to expect, was he ready for this?

wait... what if he’s been reading all the signs wrong? oh my god, what if you didn’t even see him that way?!

“aish... don’t laugh... you’re so—” yuki felt the scarf get yanked around his wrist like a lasso and before he could react, it was you who pulled him in close this time

his hands landed on your shoulders, trying to balance himself but you kept him steady, putting your arms around his waist as you grinned like a little kid

“i like you, too.” you confessed, overwhelmed with happiness as yuki felt the same

yuki smiled and closed the distance, feeling like you two were in your own world

the fabric store was forever his favorite now, because it was the place he 1. found the perfect silk material for a costume (every time), 2. kissed you for the first time, and 3. had his first relationship start

from that point forward, you two entered a relationship full of mutual respect, care, and even love later on

(yuki said it first, surprisingly enough. but this time, it was on purpose)

yuki fantasized about being the dream couples he saw online in his pinterest board, reblogging couples outfits and creating a private folder he gazed at every once in a while

when you discovered this, you intentionally showed up wearing the same color scheme as yuki and the rest was history

once yuki saw you were just as excited and giddy to appear as a couple, yuki put his sewing skills to work as he made custom pieces he knew you’d love

you name it, you probably got it: matching berets with your signature color, pretty hair ribbons and bows, and for anniversaries/special events, yuki would work day and night to craft the outfit of your dreams

yuki loved expressing his affection through gifts because it was personally difficult to say he liked you without sounding like his default sarcastic state

every day was valentine’s day, by the way

so showing up with a huge, perfectly wrapped box or bag with colorful tissue paper that always correlated with the gift wasn’t out of the norm, yuki loved spoiling you~ (lucky you!)

if yuki saw something in the window on his way home that reminded him of you, he bought it without a second thought and watched your eyes lit up (so worth his empty wallet)

if yuki found a teddy bear that was the embodiment of all things soft and lovely, it was already at your door step with a handwritten letter he would never admit to writing

everything that made him happy started reminding yuki of you (you had to directly tell him to stop to prevent him from going broke)

any time yuki went out shopping, he took you because he liked seeing what your interests and dislikes were

yuki was very thoughtful and considerate, always paying attention to how you reacted to certain things outside of the fashion world as well

but you also watched him closely as well, and it allowed yuki to reveal his more vulnerable, insecure side when he found out you didn’t judge him and even, understood him

you also practiced doing couple’s PDA with him when you noticed how scared he got

you would initiate hand–holding, hugging, and doing small things like bending down to tie his shoes or any ribbon he had on his outfit; just casual contact to get him used to gentle touches that were more than just friendly now

it took a while, but yuki started returning the favor by fixing the accessories in your hair and even wore this tacky tenma bracelet you bought for him as a gag gift

(he hated it and the way tenma looked like some egotistical maniac, but it made you laugh every time. it was worth it) (maybe tenma’s dumb face was good for something)

it was also nice to hear genuine, real compliments everyday. you make it your goal to remind yuki of the small details you loved on his outfit, or how soft his hair was, and the way he presented himself just to show your attention was all his when you two were together

yuki would grow to trust you with his whole heart, feeling his own heart become candy because you were just so sweet

you stole his heart and never gave it back, and it was lovely to know you were taking great care of it and truly treasured him for him

between the two of you, you taught yuki how to trust and rely on other people despite his independent complex as he often put on a strong front

yuki would go to you first if he had a problem, which was hard at first but he got into the habit because he wanted to show you he cared

yuki would text you frequently asking about your day (newsflash, he actually does want to know) and would send you updates of any piece he was working on

you understood yuki prioritized his seamstress career and always proudly spammed his social media posts with heart emojis and adoring compliments

(he always had to hide and cover his face with his hands because he was so grateful you were so proud) (he never told you that, though)

even though he’d instantly get flustered and tried to deny them, you helped him believe them more and more everyday until he could confidently take anything on in the world

(“if my partner thinks it’s cute, i’m cute!” yuki loudly said to the mirror, hearing your laugh the next room over. oops)

you guys didn’t have to talk every single day, though, don’t get me wrong. you two always wanted the best for each other and defined healthy boundaries to allow both of you to flourish and prosper!

yuki, at first, always apologized for spending time on certain projects but you never accepted them, instead encouraging him even more and praising his work ethic

yuki still sent you links throughout the day of things to try and cute outfits he’d love to see you in

it was so thoughtful that throughout the day, you were always on his mind even if he was busy

but no matter what, you two always supported one another through your endeavors and did everything 100% with each other’s best interests at heart

you really liked yuki, and he liked you back just as much, maybe even a little more

(okay, definitely a lot more)

[sanstropfremir]

it’s the episode 8 review!!! how many episodes is this show supposed to even be?

the stages from the episode feel like such a grab bag.... i still don’t understand why they didn’t put all the skill stages together, and then did the normal two episodes of the third round. i guess it makes sense that they didn’t want to have six stages in one episode and then three in the other two, but eh. 

feeling kinda average on these as a whole, there’s a lot of good elements going on here but probably because of my own preferences (i don’t listen to ballads or blackpink) none of them really hit all the buttons. hopefully this will be a shorter review because i'm only going to do a quick rundown of the vocal stages; i dont really have that much to say about them because they are (intentionally) not very stage picture focused. i'll do the normal stage breakdowns for the other two though, even though i won’t rank them because we still need to see the other four!

vocal stages

sf9 + tbz + ikon

not much to say here other than wow, that’s RED. glad to see some more specific use of spotlighting and i always love when they light things on fire. i do wish they had fill lit with a brighter amber so we could actually get a bit more detail on their faces, especially because there’s six of them. i appreciated the simple blocking and only using one of the ‘stages,’ this stage didn’t need to be anything complicated and it wasn’t. i don’t love spinning camera shots because they make me a bit ill, and i'll forgive the constant cutting because it's a vocal stage and there isn’t any other real movement that we should be paying attention to. not my favourite of the two, i found it visually a bit too repetitive and complex at the same time. always love a crushed velvet suit though, so bonus points for that.

atz + skz + btob

i was braced for the worst and i dont know what kind of miracle happened but it was listenable! like i said, not a ballad fan but i could listen to eunkwang all day. i love a good plinth for a ballad stage, they’re one of my favourite devices in kpop design and i especially love it with a good groundlevel fog. glad they kept it black and white for the first half of the stage, it was in line with the blooming flower projections, and it made a very clear colour arc. they kept the visuals clean and simple with very little blocking at all, a very smart choice for this stage. not sure why they decided it would be the chanel time stage, which i disapprove of because i don’t like chanel, but i do love eunkwang’s shirt with the cameo buttons and the massive turnback cuffs, very 17th and also 19th century. i know they never do it because they dont read on stage normally but yes absolutely more thin chain pendant chokers on men, thank you! i also liked that there was emphasis on a more traditional lighting scheme, there weren't any crazy concert effects, just some good directional beam spotlights and the rear stacks in the climax. 

third round stages

ikon

costume

the first look for them is definitely my fabourite of theirs so far. there’s enough variation in the jackets that the base layer of tshirt and jeans don’t look too repetitive. and i do love a good statement jacket. my favourite is probably donghyuk’s because i'm a sucker for fringe always.

i don’t like the backup dancers costumes, but given the way i’ve reacted to every other all black outfit for this entire show i don’t think anyone was surprised about that. these ones particularly irk me because they’re very matte; there's pretty much no texture or pattern differentials to define the shape of the limb, which makes them disappear when theyre all grouped together (mostly on the women). i think they probably were intending to make a statement/emphasis on the hands because of the sleeve cutoff point, but there were so many arm movements that were just totally missed because the costumes were just black voids. most egregious parts are here, with the female dancers up center. i can barely tell what the movements are unless i’m paying specific attention to them because there's so many black shapes. maybe it was the point for it to be an indiscernable writhing mass, but it wasn’t my vibe.

don’t love this styling on lisa. i hate peeptoe shoes in general but peeptoe boots are the worst offenders. they make you look like you have duck feet, no matter who you are. especially with a flat cutout like that. a universally unflattering shoe, and i would know, i worked in a shoe store for two years. this whole look is just pg-13 rihanna cfda awards 2014 and really nobody should try to run up against rihanna.

also i have to mention this because it’s actually really bothering me, but lisa’s backup dancers are serving very allgemeine ss looks and i do not like it. generally when we see ‘military’ uniforms in kpop theyre usually modelled off older styles (pre wwii) of western uniforms that usually aren’t in circulation, and they’re usually non-matching and embellished in ways that are deliberately not military. i know logically that it's a budget constraint+they’re backup dancers+current trend thing but the clean lines with only button detailing and the all black and that specific harness shape? it hit my brain the wrong way. i mean, technically those uniforms are designer because hugo boss did them, but the uh..... girlboss move didn’t land for me.

this is my PERSONAL OPINION please for the love of all that is holy do not come yelling at me about this. it’s all under a cut, you chose to read the post.

set

very glad to see some busy kitschy sets! this is a massive build, since there’s essentially three full sets here: the temple, the jungle, and the first tiny room. and all of them are very heavily decorated. 

the starting room is just five walls on casters (wheels), that have been set into place with the cameraman and ikon inside at the start, and then once they exit the walls can be easily struck and rolled off set. simple, smart, and convenient!

i missed it the first couple times around but glitching out the projections in the temple for a split second was a neat little trick.

the silver and polygonal nature of the tiger/panther/cat(?) head is a bit disconnected from the gold and the aesthetic of the rest of the stage for me. the difference between the original room set and the jungle tracks, but the cat head isnt able to make the same leap for me. i'm also not a fan of mixing metals so maybe that’s why.

the tiger/panther/cat(?) head is a fun physical transitional device; i'm a big fan of tunnels and small transitory spaces like that and if they’re well dressed like this one they do so much for establishing place and mood.

i'm very sure i’ve seen this style of polygonal animal head with laser eyes before....i cannot for the life of me remember where or for what. i know wang yibo did a panther stage for sdc3 that had a human formation panther with green laser eyes, i wonder if i'm just crossing wires.

OH nevermind it’s because it looks like the witcher medallion. wires were definitely crossed.

lighting

using purple/teal lighting for the jungle was a smart choice because purple is the direct compliment to the gold and also is much more flattering on humans than green. green is one of the colours that humans can see the most variations in, so when something is green when it's not supposed to be (like human skin), we register that very quickly and associate it with unease and sickness. you know how old fluorescent lights have that greenish tinge that kinda makes you feel ill? it's your cone cells and your brain recognizing that you’re looking at things that are not supposed to be green.

very clean colour arc, i love to see it.

sound

it’s.....fine? i don’t listen to blackpink and have no opinions on their music other than it's not my type. i dont really know what the thematic connection to the visuals is, which is not strictly necessary in a lot of cases, but i don’t particularly care for the conflation of ‘savage’ and a (presumably) precolonial religion that’s assembled from stereotypes of real colonized cultures. you can come at me about how ‘it's not that deep’ all you want but i am here specifically doing an in depth analysis, and i gotta point it out. i'm not here to pass judgement on you if you didn’t realize or don’t care or whatever, i'm just saying that it's important to consume content with a critical eye. what you do with that information is your own personal choice, but you should be aware of it at least. 

staging

they took a big risk eating popcorn right before singing, and we definitely got some residual mouth noises of them trying to clean out their teeth. eating on stage is difficult in general because you have to make sure it's not going to dry out the performers mouths, because they dont have access to water and it takes WAY longer to chew and swallow something than you would expect. there’s a LOT of testing that goes into making stage food and guaranteed it’s not made out of what it looks like or what its supposed to be; i worked on a production of amadeus were we did literal weeks of testing amalgams of different desserts to make sure that salieri could actually eat the ones onstage without totally drying him out, because fun fact about that show, salieri doesnt leave stage like, at all, so there was no way to get him water. poor bloke.

i thought the blocking of this was really smart. the long take from the ‘normal’ room and transition into the jungle was super slick, even if that weird circle the camera did while pointed up at the ceiling was unnecessary and pointless.

bobby’s ‘acting’ was extremely funny and that’s the only way people are allowed to act surprised now. edvard munsch scream style only.

the pacing is a bit off and this time it wasn’t mnet’s editing that fucked it up. as fun as it is to have a feature, clearly she wasn’t allowed within proximity of the rest of them for covid or other yg related reasons, but it made for some extremely long transitions, especially the one out of her verse. it kills the momentum of the stage in that beat, even though they manage to pick it up after.

this is a very simple little narrative arc that’s easy to follow and doesn’t require any extra explaining. which is exactly the kind of arc that groups should be doing at this stage in the game. this is a good formic step up for ikon!

i thought the turning off of the monitor at the end was fun and a good callback to them watching the videos at the beginning of the stage. a nice clean way to make it circular.

skz

costume

FINALLY something different on the skz boys! these were mostly fun eboy looks for them, and i like it on the basis that it's not the same as the last set of costumes.

bang chan out there with his thigh OUT and a (fake) bridge piercing? LOVE to see it. great work.

(copy-paste every thing i’ve said about backup dancers wearing all black)

the backup dancers that were dressed as bystanders/extras were great! they should have kept that with all of them because it would have given a little more shape to the choreography and establishing what function the backup dancers were supposed to have.

set

that is meant to be a giant rice cooker on stage, right? i think so because it's a god’s menu mashup? if that's not a rice cooker i have NO idea what its supposed to be

there’s only two large setpieces here, which was a smart way to go. i LOVE the subway car doubling as the truck, even if the truck itself makes no narrative sense. what a fun way to double the use of a single big piece. you’ll be able to see the way it moves in the full cam but it splits down the centre and there entrance doors at the back with attached stairs that bang chan and the dancers use to climb up.

lighting

not a whole lot happening here. i like the cool white leds in the subway car and the contrast with the more warm tones of the outside, which is good atmospheric establishment, but i can't discern a visible arc. 

not a fan of these projections; they’re in line with what we’ve seen from skz so far, which is: extremely literal. i dont think they’re that distracting, but they’re not to my personal taste. they really should have kept the comic panel theme that they did for changbin’s first verse, because that was inventive and fun to watch! and a great atmospheric indicator! i would love to see a bit more experimental projection use but it's hard when they don’t have a lot of time to build these stages and the lighting team is definitely working remotely.

sound

i love that they made the choice to do some actual talking, it’s a good gimmick and it works for the deadpool/comic book/fourth wall break theme, but australian accents take me the fuck out i am so sorry i cannot listen to either felix or bang chan speak english without laughing uncontrollably. 

i don’t like this arrangement but i'm not surprised about that, given my predilections. i'm also tired of skz shouting STRAY KIDS in every performance they do. i know on music shows it's probably more relevant and yea producers tags are a thing but we’ve been watching this show for nearly two months at this point. we know who you are, you can stop yelling. be more creative with it!

staging

my biggest issue with this stage is that it doesn’t have a payoff. there is an arc here: they’re stealing the truck, but why are they stealing the truck? who are they stealing it from? who are they fighting against? it's kind of important in a stage where the theme is stealing and fighting someone that you tell us who that is. in both of ateez’s previous stages were they were both stealing (rhythm ta) and fighting (wonderland), they made sure to show us who the villain was. there needs to be tension for a big blowup climax to actually pay off. whether it be against a a balloon arm kraken or a fascist government. this stage could have reached that next step if they’d just done a little bit more exposition. 

there were a lot of fun choreo moments here, and this is probably my favourite choreo of theirs so far. i thought the whole first bit in the subway car was excellent and a very fun play on those viral videos that we used to see roll around every so often of dancers doing routines in subway cars.

did it need the guns? not in the slightest. more on this point later. i could talk more about weapons and weight here, but i’ve done that several times already.

like with the tbz game of thrones stages, theyre relying a little too much on the audience's preconceptions of the source material in order to carry the theme. the guns are there because deadpool likes guns, but they don’t actually use the guns for anything? the most we get of the stealing segment is felix and the safe, which admittedly is a great bit with him leaping over and under the ‘laser’ lines (theyre likely led strips). because comic books are by nature procedural and deeply tied to narrative, it's unsatisfying when there’s no tension and no payoff.

HOW did we manage to get two stages that are blackpink covers with remote/tv static gimmick and durags? i know the slot machine of kpop tropes is not very big but surely the probability of hitting triple sevens on this one was pretty low. i’m pretty meh on both of these stages overall. skz was unsatisfying but i loved the choreo in the subway bit so that bumped it up a little ahead of ikon’s in my personal preferences, but i'm reserving my actual rankings for next week. assuming we get the other four stages next week and they dont do something stupid and only show two. which they very well might. i’ve stopped trying to understand why mnet does things the way that they do. 

as always the ask box is open, drop your comments/questions/personal opinions, i love to hear ‘em! but don’t be rude just because some of this is touchier subject material.

[petekaos]

I would very much like a play by play if this mike and gunsmile concept

hiiii nonnie! oh my god strap in for the ride because i’ve thought about this ever since i got on my bullshit about manboss. gunsmile and mike have such amazing chemistry from the little we’ve seen of them together and i really want them to have a whole series! 

so the basic concept is this. two twenty-something-year-olds, fresh out of uni and stars in their eyes, learn how to be adults. a slice of life! they both need a roommate and so they find each other through a newspaper ad and decide to room together, as the lease for the apartment is for two years so far anyway and their work times don’t line up. over time, and over heartbreak and job searching and happiness and tears, they become steadfast friends. and somewhere in between leftovers slowly losing the post-it-notes of “this is mine!!!! don’t touch!!!” to “i warmed up yesterday’s rice for you” and the walls turning from clean and white to littered with pictures of them both... they fall in love.

gunsmile’s character: 

his name would be jay! his nickname, at least :^)

he seems super shy and reserved at the beginning. this mostly stems from my need to see gunsmile play a more subdued and shy role at the beginning so we can see more of his wonderful microexpressions! 

because of this, he seems a bit standoffish, but after spending more time around benz (mike’s character) and having him coax him out of his shell and let him know it’s... okay for him to be him, he turns out to be the biggest goofball and nerd who only sees the good in people!!!

he graduated in film and he’s interning at a production company and something that he’s fairly good at is separating his work from his life. whenever he sits down to watch movies, he makes sure they’re the most trashy ones he can get a kick out of.

sensitive! once they become closer, he always makes sure that benz eats enough during the day and cooks for him / warms food up for him when he comes back from work. he’s really good at reading people he’s close to and tries to help them in small ways.

he has the best relationship with his mother :’) they go out for coffee every sunday without fail. benz tags along every now and then and jay’s mum adores him.

Bad At Communicating. he’s the type to keep everything in his own head and overthink and overanalyse things, which leads to internal as well as external conflict. he pretends everything is fine even when it’s not :(

good with animals! i just wanna see gunsmile with a corgi!!!!

mike’s character:

his name is benz!!

himbo. if you look up the definition of himbo in the dictionary, that is him.

he’s super outgoing, but not in... a good way. he socialises a lot and has a lot of friends but doesn’t have close people who really understand him, nor is he truly vulnerable. (also he’s not a player he’s dated like two people in his life and those relationships lasted upwards of eight months)

he’s a huge huge people pleaser which leads to him taking care instead of being taken care of far too often and he pushes aside his own feelings and problems to listen to and take care of other people, but in an unhealthy way, to the point where he just has a whole pile of repressed emotions he hasn’t worked through.

he graduated in marine biology!!! manages to land a job at a biotech company for research which has him working late nights more often than he likes but he always comes home to jay sitting on the sofa with the soft yellow light on and the quiet whirring of the tv. there’s always dinner on the table.

the thing about him is that he’s good at expressing his surface feelings. he wants to talk and sort things out because he doesn’t like other people not getting the closure he needs. underneath it all, benz is insecure as hell about his own self-worth, but in a way that he’s barely aware of it himself.

even though jay cooks more, he’s better at cooking! he makes dinner on the weekends and likes to bake as stress-relief. there’s always leftover cupcakes lying around in the fridge and he just likes seeing jay light up whenever he sees them.

he’s not close with his family. they just... drifted, and were never really close in the first place. he’s still in touch with his little sister who teases the hell out of him any time she can :^)

general concepts: 

them getting a corgi together once their work times allow them to take care of one!

benz is the first to fall in love. but he’s not the first to say it, which surprises both of them, and yet doesn’t at the same time. it was in the early days, when jay was still a bit closed off. he came home a little earlier and saw him dancing to a song through the curtains, goofing around in his slippers and a brush to his lips as a makeshift microphone. he didn’t realise it then, but he’d fallen in love.

jay fell in love gradually, over a period of time, until one day he was in the grocery store putting back his favourite biscuits in favour of benz’s favourite cereal because it didn’t fit in their budget for the month when he realised that he couldn’t picture his life without him anymore.

they have SO MANY inside jokes and bits that they do that frustrates everyone to no end!

cooking together... baking together...

conflict comes in the form of internal conflict and lack of self-worth, as well as the impending end of their lease. many things go unsaid because neither of them know how to say them, or touch each other.

all in all... i picture a soft, quiet series about character development and two men falling in love as their life changes around them and as they have to learn how to make it out into the world themselves. motifs are things like “you’re never alone”, food as a metaphor for love, etc. gunsmile and mike could act the hell out of a concept like this and i wish gmmtv would give them ANY kind of rom-com or series together :((

[petersasteria]

168 Hours - Haz Osterfield (3)

Pairing: Haz x Reader

Haz Osterfield Masterlist ||  Ultimate Masterlist || 168 Hours Masterlist

DISCLAIMER:  *This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.*

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: In which your son’s wish comes true and it turns horrible. Now, he has to fix it in 168 hours.

𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲 arrive at the angels' apartment building and Harley looks impressed. It looked really fancy and the color scheme is white and gold. Amadis looks at Harley says, "It's my first time here as well, but act cool. Don't freak out or anything." Harley nods. "Good." Amadis says before they enter the building. Amadis smiles at everyone, because he recognizes them from when they were up in heaven.

"Hello Finn! I haven't seen you in a while." Amadis smiles and pulls the other angel in for hug. Finn, the other angel, hugs back before pulling away, "Welcome to earth, Amadis! I miss heaven. How are things there?"

Amadis shrugs, "Same old. How are you?"

"I've been tracking this murderer in this time period. And this person isn't a murderer yet in 2017. So, I've been spying on them." Finn sighs and runs his hand through his curls.

"Wait." Harley says. "Did you say 2017?"

Finn nods in confusion, "What's wrong?"

Harley looks like he's about to faint as he looks between Finn and Amadis, "Holy shit. I time traveled."

"Language!" Amadis and Finn say at the same time. Harley looks around, "This is definitely not my time period."

"What year are you from?" Amadis asks. Harley looks at him and nervously bites his nails. He looks around and moves closer to the angels and whispers, "I'm from the year 2031."

Finn's jaw drops and Amadis gasps. They look at each other in silence before Finn's wristwatch lights up and blinks. Finn looks down at his wristwatch and clicks his tongue, "I have to go now."

"Wait, how does this apartment thing work?" Amadis frantically asks before Finn leaves. "Just go to the reception desk and say your name and they'll give you the key to your apartment. I'll catch you guys later. Bye!" Finn says hurriedly as he rushes out of the building.

Amadis does what Finn said and they go up to the apartment. They get on the level where Amadis' apartment is and find the apartment. Harley looks at the doors as they walk through the long hallway, "It's arranged alphabetically and not by numbers like it should."

Amadis looks at the doors too and smiles in amazement, "I just noticed that."

Harley stops in front of one door, "Look!" Amadis stops walking and stands beside Harley. They stare the door with the name 'Anthony' on it.

"Anthony? Like as in, Saint Antho-" Amadis gets cut off by the door opening and out comes Saint Anthony himself. Amadis didn't even know that a few saints were in this building too.

"Hello there, Saint Anthony!" Amadis smiles.

Saint Anthony looks up and gives him a tight-lipped smile, "You know, I'd love to stay and chat but some teenager lost their dress and now I have to find it. I have to find a lot of things actually." Harley and Amadis catch a glimpse of the inside of Saint Anthony's apartment and they scrunch their face when they see how much of a mess it is.

Saint Anthony pulls out a list from his pocket and reads it before closing and locking the door, "I have to shop for these lost things and deliver them. I didn't know I'd be a personal shopper after I died."

Saint Anthony rolls his eyes and bids the two goodbye. Amadis and Harley walk a few feet and reach the door with Amadis' name on it. Amadis unlocks the door with his key and he enters the apartment with Harley.

Amadis closes the door and takes in his new apartment. It looks so immaculate. Harley walks to the kitchen counter and sees a brochure on it. Curious, he grabs it and reads it.

"Whoa, this building has a rooftop canteen! It even has a swimming pool!" Harley smiles excitedly. "I remember when uncle Tom and I went to a resort in Thailand for my birthday. It was so fun!"

Amadis looks at the boy sadly. I'm sure he misses his uncle Tom and his own time period. Amadis makes a silent promise that he will get Harley home to his own time period as soon as possible.

"I miss him." Harley frowns.

"I know you do." Amadis says and goes straight to the kitchen to see what's available to eat or cook. Harley looks around the room and his eyes land on a framed picture in the living room. He puts the brochure back on the kitchen counter before walking to the living room. His eyes widen when he realizes it's a family picture. His family picture.

He picks it up and a small smile appears on his face. However his smile quickly disappears when he sees that his little brother Harvey is fading.

"Amadis, check this out!" Harley calls. Amadis quickly rushes to him and sees the picture. "Oh, that's cute!"

"My little brother is fading away in this picture." Harley points out.

"Well, that's unfortunate."

"How do we get mum and dad to meet?" Harley asks in frustration as he sits on the couch and puts the picture frame on the coffee table. Amadis' wristwatch lights up and blinks like Finn's. He looks at it and he says, "Looks like we'll pay your dad a visit."

"What do you mean?" Harley asks in confusion.

"It says on my watch that he's walking around town and your mum is also walking around town." Amadis says and he scrolls down on the little message on his watch.

'It's probably Apple watch or something.' Harley thinks.

"It also says here that today's the day they're supposed to meet." As soon as Amadis says this, Harley's jaw drops.

"We have to go now. We'll grab something to eat on the way." Amadis says, walking to the door with his apartment keys in hand.

Harley crosses his arms, "Do you even have money for that?"

Amadis smirks, "Do you really think God would send me here unprepared? I'll just check the mailbox. There should be an envelope there with cash in it. Our budget is two thousand pounds per day."

If there's one thing that Amadis is so sure of, it's the budget for the angels whenever they're sent to earth for a mission. He knows this because he used to help in mailing the money to the angels on earth.

"Is God, like, a sugar daddy?" Harley asks while snickering. They exit the apartment unit as the angel locks the door before they walk to the elevator.

"What's a sugar daddy?" Amadis asks. Harley sighs, "Never mind."

This is going to be a long day.

* * * *

sorry for the short chapter x

Yes, it’s Finn Wolfhard.

𝐒𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐬𝐤 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐱

[ofelizabeth]

[ LUCY BOYNTON // CIS WOMAN // SHE/HER ] – oh my god, is that [ ELIZABETH WILSON ]?! the tabloids can’t seem to stop buzzing about the [ TWENTY-SIX ] year old [ PUBLICIST ]. the industry has dubbed [ her ] [ THE FALLEN ANGEL ] and sources say, [ she ] is [ + TENACIOUS ] and [ + AMBITIOUS ], yet also [ - APPREHENSIVE ] and [ - STUBBORN ]. yet, with all this gossip, who really knows?! one thing’s for sure, though– queen bee has it out for [ her ]! 

hello hello !!! i’m andi ( 23, pst, she/her ) and below the cut are more details on elizabeth. but give this a like and i’ll come to you for some plotting !

* / BASICS . 

full name: elizabeth jade wilson

nickname(s):  lizzie, ellie 

age: twenty-six

date of birth: january 8th

zodiac sign: capricorn

place  of  birth: newport beach, california

gender: cis woman

pronouns: she / her

sexual orientation:  heterosexual

language(s) spoken: english ( also learned a bit of french during a semester abroad in college )

accent: american

* / APPEARANCE . 

face claim: lucy boynton

hair color: blonde

eye color: green

height: 5′5″

tattoos: n/a

piercings:  one on each earlobe – usually gravitates towards small gold hoops or dainty earrings.

* / FAMILY . 

parents: jennifer & david wilson – have been married for 30 years.

sibling(s):  two older brothers ( daniel & michael ) , one younger sister ( olivia )

children: none, and is unsure if she’d even want kids in the future.

* / CAREER . 

occupation: publicist

experience: roughly five years into her career 

body of work: had supporting roles in a handful of small budget films from the time she was seventeen until twenty-one, some of which ended up getting a good amount of recognition. she then transitioned into talent representation instead and currently has a roster of ten clients.

clients: tbd

* / BIOGRAPHY . 

as the first daughter to jennifer and david wilson, elizabeth was spoiled from the very beginning. her family was close and the type to host large thanksgiving gatherings every year, with multiple sets of cousin traveling into newport for a holiday that she personally didn’t find too substantial. regardless, she was grateful for the bond those gatherings created, and to this day keeps in touch with most of her extended family.

during one of the many gatherings, her aunt – a casting director in the industry – planted the idea of acting in her head. she had ‘the look,’ and apparently that was all anyone cared for. not knowing how to say no, her mother signed them up for several commercial casting calls, figuring that, if anything, it would act as an extracurricular activity to include in future college applications.

from a young age, elizabeth had always been tenacious. her parents raised her to stand her ground, so that was exactly what she did. going after what she wanted came naturally, but sometimes it resulted in coming across rather blunt and stubborn – two qualities that weren’t exactly helpful during the beginning of her early acting career.

it took a couple auditions, but with some connections from her aunt, she eventually landed a commercial for a cereal brand at the age of thirteen. after that, they continued coming in, with elizabeth completing around five commercials a year throughout her teenage years.

when it came time to graduate and apply for college, she didn’t know what to do. acting was suddenly a career option that made decent money, but part of her was unsure of the decision. instead, she decided to attend the university of southern california and major in communications. if anything were to go wrong down the line, at least she had something to fall back on.

throughout college, elizabeth continued going to auditions and was lucky enough to land several supporting roles for small budget films. they weren’t the most talked about films of the year, but some did get a decent amount of recognition.

breaks from college were common as her shooting schedule demanded more attention, and suddenly more of her time was being asked to complete press tied to the releases. with only one year left of college, dropping out didn’t seem like an option. instead, she cut down on her acting demands and focused on completing her degree. with each class attended, the more she fell in love with the communications field. she was already familiar with dealing with press from several junkets they had done for films, but the more she studied, the more she seriously considered a career in publicity.

so, after graduating from usc, that’s exactly what she did. putting acting on the back-burner for the time being, elizabeth landed a job with a prominent personal pr agency that represented some of the biggest names in hollywood. five years into her career, she now has a roster of ten clients and it continues to grow on a yearly basis.

* / WANTED CONNECTIONS . 

more than just a client ( 0 / 1 ) drama and gossip ! a client of hers that she has a secret ‘friends with benefits’ style relationship with. 

old friends ( 0 / 3 ) people she might have met on the set of commercials or movies she worked on. they probably became close during production and still keep in touch. could also have met at usc ? 

best friend ( 0 / 1 ) she basically tells this person everything. 

exes ( 0 / 2 ) could’ve been either a serious relationship that lasted for months / years, or a quick one that only made it a month or two. happy to go over how it ended / details with you ! 

enemies ( 0 / 1 ) i’m a sucker for drama and angst, so yes please. happy to plot out details with you !

honestly anything and everything ! if something on this list doesn’t catch your eye, i’m more than happy to brainstorm something else.

[humanperryfic]

A Twisted Time

There are two timers on Perry's wrist. One counting down until he meets his soulmate, the other counting down until his soulmate dies.

The good news? The first timer runs out today.

The bad news? So does the second one. 

Read on FF.net here and AO3 here. 

TW’s: Major character death, blood, injury, and disturbing hallucinations. 

Perry stares at his computer screen, watching the loading bar creep slowly across the screen.

Another half hour, and his operating system will be up to date- by early 2000's standards.

It's not like he can really complain. It would be a waste for him to have any sort of fancy tech in his cubicle, what with how often he's away from headquarters. It makes much more sense for him to have a better watch.

Sure, the computer is definitely a product of the ever-dwindling OWCA budget, but as long as it can still print his paperwork and run the report program, he's alright with it.

If, y'know, it would actually finish updating. He's been sitting here for almost an hour, waiting for the update to finish. At this point, he's considering just borrowing Agent W's computer.

If only he had stuck around a few more minutes yesterday to finish his report.

So he waits, scrolling through his inbox on his phone. One of the few programs actually running at the level expected of the current year.

Apparently the dish is down, so Monogram will be giving assignments in person today.

His phone buzzes in his palm. A text from Candace.

You're meeting your soulmate today, right?

Perry grins. Yes, yes he is. He pushes his sleeve just enough to bare the first vibrant purple timer on his wrist. Only ten minutes and thirty seven seconds until he meets his soulmate.

Only ten and a half minutes!, he texts Candace. I'll send you a picture when I meet them.

His grin falters when he catches a glance at the second timer on his wrist. The one that he hasn't shown the kids- or anyone, really. Only Lawrence. It's also on his OWCA papers and medical records, but that's different.

The calculations come naturally to him- he's only been doing them since he was old enough to understand the numbers.

He has six hundred and nineteen seconds until he meets his soulmate, and eight thousand, five hundred and forty six seconds until he loses them.

~~~

Ten minutes later, Perry's still staring at the green bar crossing the screen.

He picks up the ruler from his desk and holds it against the monitor.

Ten minutes, six millimeters. He leans back in his chair and does the mental math. One and two-thirds millimeters per minute, that's 0.0278 millimeters per second. Converted to miles per hour and...well, that number would be easier read in scientific notation.

Carl knocks on the cubicle wall. "Hey there, Agent P."

Perry waves. Good morning, Carl.

"We have a mission for you. If you'll follow me?"

Perry stands up, shoving his phone in his pocket.

Either way, he follows Carl through the cubicles.

"As you've likely read, the dish is down this morning," Carl says. "Besides, the Major wants you meet someone."

He looks up, just in time to not run headlong into the door frame of Monogram's office.

Instead, he runs straight into the agent already in there.

His wrist heats up, right where the timer is. Is this his soulmate? He wants to check, but it would be rude.

The agent turns around. "Well, hello there." Perry smiles. The man's voice is rough, with a strong German accent.

Perry shakes the man's outstretched hand. Hello, he signs, hoping that this man knows ASL.

"Oh, you prefer sign." The other agent nods. Hello, my name is Heinz. He pauses, a sheepish expression on his face. My grammar may not be the best anymore, sorry.

Perry smiles. I'm mute, not deaf, so you can speak if you'd rather. As an afterthought, he adds, Don't worry, your grammar is fine.

The Major clears his throat. "Agent P, meet Agent O. He's the top agent in OWCA Seattle."

Agent O (Heinz) beams. "Agent O, this is Agent P, our top agent here in the Tri-State Area."

Perry smiles and shakes his head. Best agent might be a bit of a stretch.

"Don't sell yourself short, Agent P. Anyway, you two are going to be going on an incredibly dangerous mission. You will be right here in the Tri-State Area, thwarting the menace known as Professor Puzzlement. He's jumped up seven notches on the Villain Scale, likely due to his new army of robot minions. Your job is to get in there and thwart him."

"Hang on. This evil guy is a local, and you brought me in from Seattle? Your top agent here should be able to take him. No offense, Agent P."

None taken. Actually, Perry takes some offense, but not towards Heinz. He's read the files on Puzzlement, the man is possibly the lowest man on the villain totem pole.

Monogram coughs. "I wasn't done."

Heinz looks sheepish. "Oh. Carry on."

"As I was about to say, Heinz, you were brought in from OWCA Seattle because of your mechanical abilities. We don't want these bots just taken down- we want to understand the tech behind them as well."

Well, that makes sense. When it comes to beating up evil scientists and blowing up their robot armies, Perry is the best in the game. Ask him to explain the how of those bots, and he's utterly useless.

Perhaps OWCA is looking to improve their tech through slightly uncouth ways.

(He can't say that he blames them. The budget dwindles more every year.)

"Once we get the dish back online, we'll send the coordinates and files to your watches. Good luck, Agents!"

They salute. Perry leaves the office, with Heinz right behind him.

As soon as the door closes behind them, Perry pulls Heinz into a nearby empty office, out of the hallway.

"Wait- Agent P- what are you doing? I don't even know your name."

My name is Perry, he signs, pulling his sleeve back just far enough to show his first timer, and I think you're my soulmate.

Heinz's mouth drops open. He scrambles to pull his own sleeve up, baring both of his teal timers to Perry.

The top one is at zero. Perry tries not to look at the second one, but he catches a glance anyway. Apparently, he's got some fifty years until he kicks the bucket.

The universe is cruel.

"Wow," Heinz breathes. "Soulmates with the cute agent I'm partnered with. Okay, I definitely don't regret taking this job."

Perry smiles, his face heating up at the compliment. You think I'm cute?

Heinz's cheeks flush a brilliant shade of scarlet. "Um, yes?"

This is going a lot better than he thought it would. Hopefully Heinz won't ask about the other...

"Say, can I see your other timer?"

...timer. Perry's blood turns to ice. He looks away, unable to meet his soulmate's eyes. He racks his brain for something to say, some explanation that won't give away the secret.

"Actually, I think I'd rather not know. It'd be kind of depressing, really. Especially if, like, I'm gonna die tomorrow. Yeah, I don't think I want to see."

Perry barely manages to keep himself from sighing in relief. Heinz has no idea how close he was to the truth.

At least he doesn't have to break the news.

Their watches both beep at the same time. The coordinates and files for the mission. The dish must have been fixed.

Shall we go stop a villain?

"Yeah, let's go." Heinz opens the door to the office, then holds out his hand.

Perry takes it.

~~~

Heinz insists that he drive over to the warehouse where Professor Puzzlement is said to be. Perry agrees, preferring to ride rather than drive the OWCA hovercars. Despite all his agent strengths, he's a horrible driver.

The wind whips through Perry's teal hair as they fly. Perry flips through the files on the Professor, looking for something he may have overlooked earlier, but there's really not much there. It seems like this mission is another case of over-inflated reports.

He turns his watch off and sits back, relaying his findings to Heinz.

"Yeah, it seemed pretty exaggerated. With anybody else, I'd believe an army of bots. Not this guy."

According to the records, his worst invention before this was a machine that was designed to cover the entire Tri-State Area in mashed potatoes.

"And they're sending two of us to deal with him."

Yeah. I mean, I'm not going to complain. It'll make things a lot more fun.

Heinz smiles, a bright beam that reflexively brings a smile to Perry's face.

"An easy job with my soulmate. What a day, huh?"

What a day.

"We'll probably be done before lunchtime. Do you think your Major will give you the rest of the day off?"

Probably not, but all I'll have to do is reports, and I could do those in my sleep.

"I have a feeling this one won't be particularly complex."

You're probably right. Perry pauses to consider something. When we get done, do you want to get lunch together?

"That would be great."

Heinz takes his right hand off the wheel to hold Perry's left, bringing a light pink blush to both their faces.

Perry doesn't tell him that the timer, the one only inches away from his fingers, won't let him live past noon.

~~~

A ring of bots greet them when they walk in the doors of the warehouse.

Apparently the scientist had built a robot army. Who knew?

(Well, OWCA knew, which is why they sent Perry and Heinz.)

No big deal, really. Perry's fought through far worse, and on his own.

"SURRENDER OR BE DESTROYED, OWCA SCUM," one of the bots booms in an electronic voice.

Perry and Heinz both draw their respective weapons. For Heinz, an EMP blaster designed to take out electronics. Perry doesn't really know how it works, but that doesn't matter. He prefers his own fists, reinforced with special fingerless gloves that prevent him from breaking knuckles on solid metal robots.

They grin and nod at each other before becoming a whirling flurry of attacks.

Heinz drops bot after bot with both EMP blasts and well-placed kicks. Perry kicks up off one bot and lands on another, piloting it into other bots as he punches in its head.

They make their way through the mess of mechanics, landing blow after blow. Perry jumps from bot to bot, prompting the mechanical monstrosities to fire on each other.

He watches as Heinz drops one bot with a blast, another with a spinning kick.

Perry's pretty much figured out why this guy is Seattle's best.

Soon, all the bots are either destroyed or deactivated. Perry jumps off the last bot, a fist of wires ripped from an exposed joint in one hand, landing on the floor next to Heinz in a fighting stance.

Heinz reaches out and fixes Perry's slightly askew fedora. Perry feels a blush come to his face, for the fourth (fifth? who knows?) time today. He smiles and straightens up, dropping the wires.

Their moment is interrupted with a loud, booming voice.

"Good morning, Agents," the voice says, "how utterly expected."

Perry looks up. A metal cage falls from the rafters. He pushes Heinz out of the way, narrowly avoiding being trapped himself.

The voice grumbles. Heinz laughs. "I've seen better traps from my grandmother."

"You insolent fools. I will soon become the supreme leader of the world, and you two will be the first I throw in lava."

Might want to start with the Tri-State Area, Perry signs, and Heinz grins.

"I really don't appreciate all this talking behind my back in front of me," the mysterious voice booms.

And I don't appreciate having to force myself through an army of bots, but here we are. Heinz disguises a laugh as a cough.

"If you have something to say, say it to my face."

But I am, Perry signs, summoning his most innocent expression. This time, Heinz's sharp laugh rings out.

Perry could listen to it all day.

"And you, his companion. I do not appreciate being made fun of."

Heinz elbows Perry. "Maybe we'd be more afraid if we, y'know, gazed upon your godly form or whatever."

"My godly form or whatever," the voice echoes, clearly patronizing.

"Yeah," Heinz agrees. "Like in the Greek myths, where if you gaze upon the god's true form, you die. Except you're mortal."

"I am a fan of Greek mythology," the voice admits. "So I shall allow you to gaze upon my 'true form'."

A pair of bots descend from the rafters, holding a man on their shoulders.

The professor steps off the shoulders of the bots.

Heinz lets out an incredulous laugh. "You? You're going to take over the world?" To Perry, he mutters "Even a real platypus could thwart this guy. And they don't do much."

Perry can't help but agree with Heinz's statements. The man standing in front of them is the stereotypical picture of a decrepit old man. Hunched, clutching at his back, holding tight to a cane with bony fingers.

"That is why I built the robots."

Perry takes a closer look at a felled robot near him. The design seems simplistic, and there are even more weak points than he had found during the brief battle. Heinz could probably point out even more.

"Are you even paying attention?" the Professor asks. Perry crosses his arms and leans back. Am I?

"You agents and your secret languages. Speak English," Puzzlement says.

Perry rolls his eyes. Would if I could. He dodges a robot lunging at him, then punches in its chestplate.

"And quit destroying my robots. Do you realize how long they take to make? You ungrateful OWCA agents..."

Perry tunes out the Professor's senile rant quickly. It's only a matter of time before he starts nattering on about his lawn. Considering that Heinz parked on the grassy strip in front of the warehouse, he just might. Perry turns to sign this to Heinz, who is elbow deep in the chest cavity of a robot. "Psst, Perry, come look at this."

Perry looks to where Heinz is pointing. To him, it makes no sense, but obviously Heinz can understand it.

Heinz continues to whisper. "I think I can fuse two of these bots together to create a single bot, that when moved in a specific way, will trip this kinetic motion sensor, causing these wires here to overheat, producing a mass of heat and light that we can harness as a weapon."

He looks at Perry's blank, confused stare and sighs. "Exploding robot nunchucks."

Perry grins. What do you need me to do?

~~~

Heinz has a streak of soot from one of the exploded robots across one cheek. Before he can stop himself, Perry reaches out and gently brushes some away with his thumb.

A soft smile crosses Heinz's face. Perry's hand lingers on Heinz's cheek.

No words need to be exchanged. The look in Heinz's eye tells Perry everything he needs to know.

Perry leans in, pressing his lips gently to Heinz's. His eyes slide closed, reveling in the smooth slide of Heinz's lips against his. Heinz slips his arms around Perry's shoulders, pulling him in close. Perry's hand moves to the back of Heinz's neck, fingers toying at the soft hairs there.

Too late, Perry feels the prick on the back of his neck. He rips himself away from Heinz to see the Professor, cuffs dangling from one bony wrist, wielding a hypodermic needle. A drop of something spills out the needle's tip.

Both he and Heinz lunge for the evil scientist.

Only Heinz makes it. Perry stumbles, spots dancing across his vision. The ground is rolling beneath his feet, he struggles to stay upright. The doctor tosses aside one syringe, but two hit the floor. Heinz punches the scientist, his fist shattering into a million pieces.

Perry's wrist erupts in pain. He falls to his knees, watching as the numbers there begin to twist themselves into different shapes, oozing blood.

He looks back up at Heinz and the Professor, fighting on the ground, but he can't tell who is who. A dull ache blossoms behind his forehead.

"Do you know the legend of Sisyphus, Peregrine Fletcher?" A whispering voice swirls around Perry's head, coming from both inside and out. When Perry doesn't answer, the voice continues.

"Sisyphus was an ancient Greek man who thought he could cheat Death."

The voice laughs. The blood emerging from the numbers on his wrist morphs from black, then green, then back to crimson red. Perry's hands tremble, his stomach twists up in knots.

"It didn't work out for him. In fact, when he reached the Underworld, he had a special, eternal torture waiting for him."

The voice spirals around and around. Perry turns his head, but he can't see anything. A dark fog has descended around him, leaving him in a spotlight of sorts. Muffled, mangled screams cry out from somewhere.

"Do you know what that torture was, Peregrine?"

Perry scrapes at the ground. Patterns erupt in the cement, spinning and twisting. The blood on his wrists turns to insects, crawling up his sleeves. He slaps at his arms, trying to get the bugs away, but they don't move.

"Sisyphus was cursed to spend all eternity pushing a boulder up a hill. However, whenever he was about to reach the top, the boulder would roll right back down. A futile endeavor. A metaphor for stopping death. A perfect reminder that nobody is above morality. Nobody, Peregrine."

A dark, hooded form descends in front of Perry. The form lifts Perry's chin with one cold finger, sending a shudder running down Perry's spine.

"Nobody can cheat death, Peregrine. The best doctor cannot save every life, nor can the best agent." The form spits out the word agent like a curse. Bile rises in Perry's throat. "Your lover will die today. Heed the legends. Do not try and prevent it."

Boulders fall and shake the floor. Dark dust rises, choking Perry, forcing him to cover his mouth and nose. The patterns on the cement still whirl, making Perry's eyes dip in and out of focus.

"You cannot save anyone from death, Peregrine Fletcher. You can try to be Sisyphus, but it will always turn out the same. Your loved ones will die, you will die, and you will be punished."

An hourglass appears, its sand frozen in place. The timers on Perry's wrist twist themselves into an identical hourglass, still dripping warm blood.

"Let the timer run out, Peregrine. It is inevitable."

The dark form snaps its fingers. The hourglass explodes, sand stinging Perry's skin. The one on Perry's wrist screams in pain. Perry opens his mouth in a silent scream. A hot, angry tear falls from his eye. He can't, he won't let the figure be right. He can change the timer. He will, he has to.

He blinks, and the mud, the boulders, the fog is gone. The cold of the cement bleeds through the fabric of his pants. Perry yanks down his sleeve to look at his bloodless numbers.

Two minutes left. Two minutes to do the impossible.

Perry pushes himself to stand. His head pounds, likely an aftereffect of the drugs. Black spots jump around his vision, threatening his balance.

He blinks rapidly to clear away the black patches. A scream rings throughout the warehouse.

Heinz. It has to be him.

Perry lunges towards the sound, his legs shaking. Forcing himself to move.

The scientist stands over a table, a bloodied knife in one trembling hand. Perry launches himself at the madman. The Professor falls to the floor, hitting his head, Perry landing right next to him. Perry pulls his handcuffs from his hat, cinching them tight enough to leave marks.

It's just a second too late. Heinz is bleeding from a gash on his side. He's strapped to the table, and Perry cuts the bonds. Heinz tries to sit up, but Perry pushes him back down.

You're not going anywhere with that cut. Perry pulls off his waistcoat and presses it to Heinz's side, attempting to staunch the bleeding.

"No," Heinz protests, pointing behind Perry. "Robots!"

Perry whirls around. A wall of metal monstrosities descend upon the duo. Heinz hands him the EMP blaster, and Perry manages to fell a few.

Too soon, it becomes crystal clear that they'll never make it this way. If Perry was alone, he could take the bots easily, but with an injured partner, the risk is already too high.

Perry hands Heinz the EMP blaster, then picks him up. His shoes slip on spilled liquid as he runs- he doesn't want to think about what it might be. Who's it might be.

The front door is miraculously unguarded. Perry runs through, kicking it shut behind him to buy just a few seconds.

He sets Heinz down in the front seat of the hovercar, jumping in the driver's seat. He presses his thumb into the scanner and the car's engine starts.

The car takes off, flying away from the warehouse. Perry's wrist heats up- a warning. He glances over at Heinz, who is both pressing the waistcoat to his side and firing off EMP blasts at the few robots giving chase.

His sleeve slips. Less than a minute. Perry presses his foot to the accelerator, willing the craft to go faster. Why did the warehouse have to be so far out in the middle of nowhere?

A blast rocks the the hovercraft, shaking the passengers inside. Smoke erupts from the back of the craft.

Perry barely manages to land the hovercraft in a field, carving divots into the muddy grass. There's a road not too far from their crash site, so Perry picks Heinz up and runs over. The robots are long gone, leaving the duo alone, on a dusty road between fields.

Perry twists the dial on his watch, sending out the agent-down signal. He has to try. One last fight.

Perry holds onto Heinz's hand. He's done all he can, but it's too little, too late. Heinz has lost too much blood. Perry's timer ticks down, seconds slipping away.

Heinz opens his eyes. Perry realizes for the first time that Heinz's eyes are a beautiful, icy blue.

"Perry," Heinz whispers, "show me your timer? Please?" The desperation in his voice is palpable.

A tear rolls out of Perry's eye. He nods and rolls up his bloodied sleeve to reveal the two timers. One stopped at zero, the other with twelve seconds left.

Eleven seconds.

Ten.

Heinz looks at the timer, then back at Perry.

Nine.

“You knew.”

Eight.

Perry nods, tears flowing faster and faster, carving clear paths down his soot-stained face.

Seven.

“And you still tried to save me.”

Six.

Again, Perry nods. He twists his watch again, willing the medics to come faster.

Five.

"Perry- I-" Heinz starts to speak again, but chokes, gasping for air.

Four.

He coughs, blood dribbling out the corner of his mouth.

Three.

Heinz manages to clear his airway. His grip on Perry's hand tightens.

Two.

"I love you," Heinz whispers, voice hoarse, eyes never leaving Perry's.

One.

A smile ghosts onto his lips, and he closes his eyes.

Zero.

Heinz's hand goes limp. Perry's hand darts up to his neck, checking desperately for a pulse, already knowing the answer awaiting his questioning fingers. There's nothing there.

Sirens wail in Perry's ears. Tires screech and doors slam. Paramedics lift Heinz onto one stretcher, Perry onto another. They're lifted into separate ambulances, then sped off towards the OWCA medical facilities.

Paramedics ask him questions, bandage his wounds. Perry only stares blankly at his wrist. The inked zeroes, formerly a vibrant shade of purple, slowly fade to black.

~~~

The next day, Perry sits in his cubicle, watching the bar cross the screen. This time, he doesn't check his inbox, or answer texts, or drink coffee.

He simply sits and watches the bar go across the screen, his eyes rimmed in red.

The green bar, just a single millimeter from the end, pauses.

The lights go out to groans and curses.

A few seconds later, they come back. A small outage, nothing unusual. Likely someone in Equipment testing something new.

Perry presses the power button again, and the now-empty bar comes back up. The green bar begins its crawl once more.

A futile endeavor. His modern-day rock of Sisyphus. His punishment for thinking he could defeat Death.  

Perry takes pride in the villain being wrong. But what do you do when the villain was inside you, playing on the inevitable reality of your worst fears?

What do you do when the villain is right?

Perry turns away, his nails digging into the flesh of his palms. Fresh tears spring to his eyes, threatening to spill over.

His shoulders shake in a silent sob, his stoic expression breaking down into one of pain.

Perry pulls his sleeve down, covering the stopped timers on his left wrist. The numerals inked in jet black. Zero hours, zero minutes, and zero seconds until he meets his soulmate.

Zero hours, zero minutes, and zero seconds until his soulmate dies.

[quicktelling-blog]

Amira’s Vanished Hustle, Perceptions of Missed Opportunities, and What Everyone Should Consider About the Story So Far

[deep dive under the cut]

Some messages I got over the weekend were along the lines of: “No Damira again on Friday whew you must be heartbroken huh?” But, y’all, I wasn’t surprised. And to be completely honest, my reaction on Friday was very different from the ones I saw in the tag. Yeah, I was super happy for the adorable Amira and I was also side-eying the glaring absence of Carlos’s besties at his own housewarming -- but my main thought after the clip was: “LOL OH SHIT HERE WE GO.” Because in my mind Friday was an ENORMOUS RED FLAG that the only substantial thing left to do in Amira’s story arc is the cute Bon Voyage party to send her off on her dream trip. Even before this big POV shift happened, Druck hadn’t given us any reason to expect much more than that in her remaining plot, and I’ll elaborate on that here.

I don’t wanna jump to the conclusion that Druck can’t possibly stick the landing, because hey, they might! We have no clear idea what will happen between now and the final goodbye party, so maybe good things are coming that will subvert all of our worst imaginings! But I feel like this is a hinge point in the season to do a little reassessing of expectations... and to come clean about one big reason why I’ve mostly spoken superficially about this season up until now.

The very first red flag, for me, was when I realized Druck was planning to basically pretend Amira never had a job. That oversight might not seem like a big deal to most, and it’s not like her job was the first thing Druck ever made disappear unceremoniously (remember when Leonie and Sara had other close girl friends? lol) but to me it was a signal that my expectations for Amira’s story (based on her previous strong characterization) had maybe been too high. And I immediately felt a bit cheated.

Amira was already so fleshed out coming into her season. She was demanding, quick-witted, and nurturing. She was fiercely protective of her friends, and even more fiercely ambitious, with a willingness to work harder than anyone to get ahead in life. She was sunny but tough-shelled, with a well-established resistance to trusting any men. And, loving her as much as I do, I felt strongly that she deserved to have plenty of brand new story elements that reflected all those things. To have her own story shaped around her, rather than she herself being reshaped to fit Sana’s story.

But then it was finally her turn to shine, in a Summer season, when it would make perfect sense for her to be on a job grind to earn cash for her trip, and... she’s not working? Huh? She managed to work all through a tough school year, but not her free summer vacation? Why? Because of Druck’s low budget? Because they lacked cohesion in the writing process? Some combination of the two? Yikes. Who knows. But suddenly, nonsensically, they had flushed away the perfect framing to showcase her work ethic, her daily perseverance, and her varied interactions (good and bad) with lots of strange customers around Berlin.

It felt like a bad omen to me somehow. Which wasn’t a great mindset to start the season with. And that was the beginning of me trying very, very hard not to be confused and salty about every little thing I began to perceive as missed opportunities to give Amira a new kind of substance in her story.

For example: While David, Matteo, and Sam began having fun off-screen, working on an bold alien movie, Amira inexplicably had no involvement. She kinda scoffed at the idea when it came up on-screen, then immediately lost interest in the conversation because her man was texting. Fair enough, right? That scene was moving her story forward while generously giving a little shoutout to the meta insta storyline, right? The problem is: the off-screen story ended up seeming much more interesting than watching Amira chilling on her own texting a bunch, and we weren’t even given a reason for her to not be part of it after the whole crew was invited to join in. Imagine if we had followed her onto a shitty little makeshift movie set and seen her reacting to the chaos and strangeness of it. Imagine her finding a resourceful solution to a production hiccup or mediating a creative disagreement while trying to hide her own inner turmoil from her friends. And imagine her having an extremely important conversation with David (and/or Matteo and/or Sam) about the film’s deeper themes of alienation and otherness that they can both sadly relate to.

That’s just one weirdly specific scenario, but there are sooo many other ways I fantasized about Amira bonding with her friends (particularly the ones who aren’t cishet white kids or brand new characters). Talking with one or more of them about what it means to be dangerously marginalized, or to be afraid of letting someone get close to you, or to feel torn in two different directions in life. Maybe something like that could still happen before the season ends, but I’m not counting on it. And I think the time has passed for it to have the biggest impact. It could’ve been amazing (and really narratively useful!) if it happened before the resolution of Amira’s brief conflicts with Kiki, Erva, and Mohammed. We saw a lot of scenes with her looking angry and sad, but we weren’t really privy to much of her thought process during all that reflection, so it felt uncomfortably unearned when problems she once saw as insurmountable were shortly waved aside. I would’ve really appreciated even a short conversation with some good change-of-heart exposition.

And while other people were cheering about all the controversial Sana season conflicts being blessedly truncated or completely stripped away, the whole time I couldn’t stop thinking: “Okay, awesome, but what are they gonna replace that storyline with? Nothing?” And, for the most part, that seemed to be true.

But the problem clearly wasn’t limited to a shortage of well-integrated story threads with Amira at their center. It was arguably also a failure to capitalize on the stories they did use. Instead of getting to watch the emotional fight with her mother about punching someone, and witnessing Amira faced with the threat of losing Australia, we only heard about the drama afterward. Just like we only heard about her family’s religious holiday together. Just like we only got a few texts between Amira and Jonas about the refugee event. And just like how, as I sat typing this, Amira’s mother re-blessed the trip off-screen. On and on goes the list of examples of this unfortunate tell-don’t-show approach, and I’m sure a lot of it can be attributed to low budget and tricky cast scheduling, but the time limit excuse probably doesn’t apply if Amira’s main plot really has been efficiently pared down to 7 episodes.

Don’t get me wrong, I want to reserve final judgment on the season until the credits roll, and there are plenty of good things to say about it in the meantime. Yes, it’s been lovely to see so many gorgeous shots of Tua praying, and boxing, and expressing everything from attraction to anguish to helpless rage. Yes, she and Hassan both did some really strong work selling the magnetic pull between their characters, even in the face of (what I consider to be) an underdeveloped narrative that didn’t totally sell me on the relationship overall. Yes, it was wonderful to have some aesthetically pleasing scenes of the girl squad loving and supporting each other, even if they mostly talked about boys the way Amira hoped they wouldn’t. And obviously just having a story about a strong, kind, devoted hijabi girl is vitally important visibility. So I really haven’t wanted to say anything negative in the face of all that...

... but now I have to say: if you’re feeling cheated and mad about the POV shift, then take some time to consider what else specifically you think should’ve happened to Amira before we entered this resolution phase of her story. It seemed like most people were perfectly happy for her to not face any complex conflict, and not have any lingering hardship to dramatically and triumphantly overcome. Every obstacle getting a relatively swift and easy solution felt underbaked to me, but it was a big relief and source of praise for most people in the tags right up until Amira disappeared from clips. So: in hindsight, how would you have added not just length, but also more compelling drama and greater social impact to her story, so that the extra length felt well-used? It’s really worth thinking and talking about that, even if you’re hesitant to voice any criticism of Amira’s part of the story (even after the season ends, and even if it’s totally constructive) -- because thinking and talking about it is how we’ll get that kind of richer, fuller story in the future.