#or otherwise you get stuff that takes years to appear in English

[woso-dreamzzz]

Tia Tana II

Magdalena Eriksson x Hardersson!Reader

Aitana Bonmatí x Hardersson!Reader

Part of The Big Adventures Universe

Summary: Tia Tana takes you to meet Spain's keepers

Alexia smiles at you as you and Tia Tana approach.

You smile back.

She nudges both of the girls in Keeper shirts. "She's going to be better than both of you when she grows up."

"Huh?"

"This is y/n," Tia Tana introduces," Pernille and Magda's daughter."

"The little girl in the hallway at the final against Chelsea?" One of the non-keeper girls asks," She's grown."

"Kids do that Jenni," Alexia says with an eye roll.

"Yeah but she was so little then and now she's like a teenager."

"I'm still little," You say," Because Morsa and Momma still pick me up."

It's the girl with the tattoos on her arm. She's a very vague figure in your mind. You think she took one of your Ahlgrens Bilar during the break of that match.

"y/n," Tia Tana says," This is Jenni. She used to play for Barca."

"Hi," You say before tilting your head to look at the keepers. They don't look like Zećira or any other keeper you know. But that's okay though because Momma says everyone is different and that's good because otherwise the world would be boring.

"This is Misa," Tia Tana says," She plays for Real Madrid. And Cata, she plays with me and Alexia at Barcelona. And I think you must have seen Ona before too."

"Briefly," Ona confirms," How can I forget the assistant coach of Chelsea?"

You decide that you like Ona. She has a fun accent that's different to Momma and Morsa's when they speak English. She also recognises you as the important person you were for Chelsea and that's important too.

"Used to be," You say," But now we're leaving for Germany to Bayern."

You must make a face because the girls all laugh.

"You don't like Germany?" Jenni asks.

"I like Germany because of Wolfsburg," You say," Bayern's okay, I guess, because they've got a red jersey like Arsenal. Arsenal's my second most favourite. I'm going to play for Arsenal when I'm older."

"As a keeper," Tia Tana continues, adjusting her grip on you. She jerks her chin at Misa and Cata. "That's why she's going to be better than you too."

Misa and Cata laugh and Misa gets a bit closer to give you a fist bump.

"You know," She says," If you really want to be the best keeper in the world, you need to come to Real Madrid. We're the best!"

There's outrage from the rest of the girls and Alexia easily plucks you from Aitana's arms to speak to you. You know it must be important because Momma does this sometimes too.

"Don't listen to Misa," She says," Barcelona's the best and don't let anyone else tell you differently."

You think for a moment. "Daan says Lyon is the best."

There's more outrage.

"Van de Donk thinks Lyon is the best," Alexia says," She's entitled to her own opinion."

"But it's wrong," Cata appears over Alexia's shoulder," Because Barcelona is the best and you should definitely come over and join us when you're older."

You tilt your head to the side as you think. "Tia Tana, is Barcelona good?"

"Very good," Tia Tana promises you.

Misa scoffs and rolls her eyes. "Don't indoctrinate her! She's just a baby!"

"We can't help it if Barcelona outclasses Madrid every match," Jenni chuckles.

"How many El Clásicos have you won again?" Ona teases and Misa shoves her away with an eye roll.

"Watch it, Batlle," She says," You'll see when you come back this year. We've been working on some stuff."

Cata scoffs but doesn't get involved with the little squabble. She strips her gloves. "Here," She says, pressing them into your hands," It's probably poor taste since I just beat your mum with them but, here. Every keeper needs a good set of gloves."

You beam at her. "Thank you!"

"I don't know how you guys came into custody of my baby," Morsa's teasing voice says from behind you," But I'd like to get her back now, please. Pernille would kill me if I let you take her back to Spain."

"I'm sure we could come to an agreement," Tia Tana says, smiling a wide smile at Morsa," Fifty-fifty custody? We've got Frido in Spain too. It's not like she'll forget her Swedish."

"I think Pernille's more worried about her losing her Danish than her Swedish," Morsa says. She takes you from Alexia. "And I'm actually quite fond of her."

"I got new gloves, Morsa," You tell her, holding them up so she can inspect them.

"Very nice, princesse," Morsa says," But I think it's time to say goodbye to your new friends. You look very tired."

A crinkle appears between your brows. "I'm not tired."

"Yes, you are." Morsa's chuckling now. "Come on. If we head back now I promise you can have a sleepover with Frido and Amanda."

You look at her suspiciously. "And I get to bring Rocky?"

Morsa sighs deeply. "Yes, you can bring the rock."

"Okay!"

"Say goodbye."

"Bye!" You wave at the Spanish girls happily, blowing a big kiss for Tia Tana before turning back to Morsa. "Momma lets me have sweeties when I sleep over with the Denmark girls. Can I have sweeties with Frido and Mandy?"

"Can't you just be happy that I'm letting you bring the rock?"

"Rocky would have come anyway. Can I have sweeties?"

"Fine, you can have sweets."

[jbaileyfansite]

The Wall Street Journal Interview (2024)

The 36-year-old English actor Jonathan Bailey is one of Hollywood’s newest heartthrobs. From Shonda Rhimes's Regency-era courtship dramas of “Bridgerton” to the decades-long romantic-political saga of “Fellow Travelers” to the Met Gala red carpet, he has earned admirers with his goofy charm and deep looks of longing.“

Being acknowledged as a heartthrob is incredibly flattering,” Bailey said. “It’s a big compliment, not just to you as an actor but everything around you.”

It has been a life-changing few years for Bailey, a stage actor turned screen darling. After “Bridgerton” launched him to global fame, he wrote up a document with tips to help prepare his younger castmates for the attention their on-screen romances would earn. “I think it’s about how to approach the work in a way that allows you to feel yourself and grounded,” he said.

Bailey, who’s been acting since he was a child in the Royal Shakespeare Company, reprises the role of Anthony in the third season of “Bridgerton” this month. Later this year, he’ll appear as Fiyero in the film adaptation of “Wicked” with Ariana Grande and Cynthia Erivo. He lives outside of London. Here, he talks about his favorite tea, doing gymnastics and the advice he got from Sir Ian McKellen.

What time do you get up on Mondays, and what’s the first thing you do after waking up?

I try to get up between 7 and 8. Then I try to not look at my phone, which sometimes works and sometimes doesn’t. If it’s a good day, I drink loads of water, have a bath and then just get out because I need to get outside. I’ll go for a walk, always with my headphones. If I feel a bit excited or my brain’s sort of alive, I’ll listen to a podcast because that keeps me quite calm. If not, I’ll listen to some drums and bass. 

How do you like your coffee? 

I love tea. Earl Grey tea for me. I love coffee as well.

What do you do for exercise?

I’m currently training for a half marathon. Then I do gymnastics at a local gym with loads of lovely, brilliant people. I’m part of that community, which I’m very proud of. I do handstands.

How long can you hold a handstand for?

I’ve gotten up to a minute. 

Do you meditate or journal or otherwise practice mindfulness?

Walking outside is meditation to me. There was a Buddhist center I loved when I was living in London, and I’d go there regularly to learn the practice of meditation. I believe in taking bits and bobs that work for you. I do write stuff down in a book that I carry with me, lessen the load in the brain when I can. 

Do you have any hobbies or habits that might surprise your fans? 

Probably playing loud music and dancing around naked. 

“Fellow Travelers” follows your character, Tim, as he falls for Matt Bomer’s Hawk over the course of several decades, from 1950s McCarthyism to the AIDS crisis in the 1980s. How did you get into character? 

With Tim, I felt like there was so much understanding that was in my bones already just from being me. Understanding the character who you’re playing opposite is also really good. Me and Matt, we didn’t really talk about it but we had that understanding of the experience of what these queer, gay people were experiencing.

Beyond that, I think about my forefathers and what an incredible opportunity it was to an academic, hands-on research of gay life in America. As a Brit, there was so much to learn, so the preparation was kind of nerdy in that respect. In another, it was incredibly emotional and spiritual. 

You’ve become very famous for the looks of longing that you’ve perfected. Do you practice them in the mirror?

No, unfortunately, I probably practiced them in real life all the way through my childhood. It’s funny, isn’t it? I can totally understand why people say that, but I think maybe what fascinates me most about humans is there’s always a distance between what you want and what you have and who you are and who you want to be. I mean, if I’m still longing and 92 years old, then I’m going to be very happy. 

How did you prepare to model swimwear for Orlebar Brown? Was there any part of you that was nervous? 

I had been doing gymnastics, so the swimsuit-model aspect of it required a couple of weeks of doing more handstandy stuff. But no, I was excited. 

There were some cute photos of you and Ariana Grande released from the set of “Wicked.” Do you have any favorite memories from filming? 

I went to CinemaCon and it was the launch of all of us together. I watched the trailer for the first time, I’m so glad I waited to see it in the big cinema. I just watched Cynthia [Erivo] and I was, like, God, Cynthia’s just going to blow everyone’s mind. You care so much about her in it. And Ari redefines Glinda in a really fun way, it just expands. 

There’s so much love for the original material. It was really fun and silly and great. Jon M. Chu [the director] just mines the emotion and is quite sincere about the truth of what’s going on with the characters.

What’s your most prized possession?

My headphones. If I lose them, I feel crazy. But also in 2017—I saved up and it felt incredibly frivolous—I started collecting the Yves Saint Laurent love prints, the original prints of the years that my sisters were born because there are four of us. Annoying actually, one of my sisters was born in 1982, and I don’t think there is a print for that year, so I might have to do a stickman or something. 

What’s one piece of advice you’ve gotten that’s guided you? 

Always do theater. That was actually from Ian McKellen. It’s in my bones anyway.

Source

[morathicain]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers!

Thank you for tagging me @inrainprose :D

Here we go! ^^

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Currently at 227 on Ao3, which might change any day with how obsessed I currently am with writing for Kiseki XD Also have a few on animexx and fanfiktion.de from old old times which I probably should start transferring ^^°

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

1,120,354 so far which I'm quite proud of, especially since most of it was written during the past 4 years (3wbf be thanked)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

A LOT! I constantly write for 3wbf and then whatever I am watching (whether it be show or movie that inspires me). Some fandoms appear more often or reappear after months or years again, others just once and then never again. Lots of niche stuff though (either the show or topic) XD

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Wait what (My Engineer - RamKing) with 737 kudos

Mutual anything (KinnPorsche AU - KinnPorsche) with 7 chapters and 700 kudos

One Moment to adore you (My Engineer - RamKing) with 649 kudos

Now you know (Not me the series - SeanWhite) with 608 kudos

Loving you on my second thought (My Engineer - RamKing) with 536 kudos

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Absolutely, YES! I've met some of my best friends through comment-discussions and -talks and I also wanna thank the people who take the time to show their appreciation <3

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oh ... PHU! Good question? I guess it would be "One last call", a JynCassian fic which of course ends with them dying?

Or "I wish you were mine but I wasn't yours", a Bad Buddy fic which has Pran push Pat away?

(if anyone has other contenders in mind, let me know, my brain is a bit overwhelmed XD I don't count the BMF one because while it ends with a breakup, for me it's a hopeful ending)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I ... I don't know? I suppose each fic that has Ter and Mae and Phon alive and together should be considered a worthy contender for that question! And I love them all <3

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not really. Got some when I started writing in English but I'm glad I managed to continue anyway ^^° only weird ones sometimes that are hard to interpret but are usually not meant in a mean way? I think?

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes, I do. It always depends on the fandom actually. And ... I don't really know how to describe it but I'm usually not that explicit, I think? Lots of emotions are involved and I try to switch things up.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Probably the SPN One Piece crossover from over ten years ago? XD They were in a prompt I got, so I had to do it :P Otherwise the crossover between Manner of Death and My Engineer "It's all about the plants, babe" with King as TanBun's child. That was a lot of fun :D

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of? Fingers crossed and wood gets tapped!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yessssss! A few into Russian and French and a Cherry Magic one into Vietnamese ^^

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

So many years back. One with a friend, another with my brother, a crack one with another friend XD Not sure we ever finished any of those and it was fun back then but I don't think I can do it again ^^°

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

To no one's surprise at all it's Shin/Neo/Miw <3

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

So far the wips I really want to finish are still on my list. I fear I might not be able to finish the one 3wbf one or the The Player one because other shows and ideas get in between, but it's still planned!

16. What are your writing strengths?

I was told I'm good at yearning and banter? Definitely like diving into angst XD

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Long plots, I tend to get distracted and also lose myself in the technicalities v.v

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

If it makes sense, why not? But not if it should be understood by everyone and happens more often.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Inu Yasha! It's been a long long time since then XD

20. Favorite fic you've written?

You ask WHAT of me????? askdjbaksjbdakjsbd

I can't say for sure. Like, I enjoy my own atots bodyguard AUs often enough, I love my own version for Moonlight Chicken more than the show itself, I very much love my current collection for Kiseki because they've taken over my whole soul. So many favourites when it comes to RamKing and omg, don't get me started on my 3wbf fics!

Me and you, both of you is one of my faves when it comes to giving Shin/Neo/Miw a happy ending though and when it's about underappreciated fics, I had a lot of fun with is "Revenge is a dish best served dead" with Ter and Phon killing Thana as ghosts :P And one I am still happy about, even if it's an old one, is a High&Low one: A kitten's persistence

Tagging now (but no pressure): @ommited-miscellaneously @nevaehs @himmelsstern ;)

[seekingthestars]

tagged by @koalammas!! thank youuu 💞

buckle up ladies and gents time for some rambles okay go

1. Are you named after anyone?

nope lol my middle name was going to be Rose after my great-grandma on my mom's side, but my parents didn't want to offend either side of the family by using a name from the other side of the family so they ended up opting for completely random names for me and my brother hahaha

2. When was the last time you cried?

around april 21 (friend's funeral, her brother was speaking during it and i did not keep it together)

3. Do you have kids?

nope! only my cat, who i love and adore with my entire heart, she is my sweet lil angel muffin

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

kinda depends i guess? sometimes?

5. What is the first thing you notice about a person?

ohhh good question hmm i guess if i'm just seeing someone in passing, probably appearance? otherwise how they interact with and treat other people.

6. What’s your eye color?

brown, but leans a little hazel-ey some days.

7. Scary movie or happy ending?

agree that i like satisfying endings that are also hopefully happy! but between these two options, happy endings, i cannot do scary movies or tv shows or anything, i get freaked out and then can't sleep lol

8. Any special talents?

i genuinely don't know L O L i don't know what would constitute a special talent??? i can memorize song lyrics pretty quickly and then they sorta embed themselves into my brain forever, does that count??

9. Where were you born?

southern usa!

10. What are your hobbies?

video games, watching movies/dramas (though i do not always have the attention span for it lol), reading, crafting (i like physically making things with my hands since i just do design on my computer all day for work! i like trying lots of different things, recently been trying a little bit of hand embroidery. also painting little ceramic figures and stuff like that), cosplaying. i've been trying this year to build taking a walk into my daily routine, not sure if i count it as a hobby or not lol

11. Do you have any pets?

my sweet sweet rileycat!!!! i love cats!!!!

12. What sports do you/have you played?

am not a sports girlie LOL i did tap/ballet/jazz for six-ish years when i was younger! in high school i took theatre classes and was in the plays/musicals instead of sports.

13. How tall are you?

5'4" which is like 162.5cm??

14. Favourite subject in school?

oh i love english, i always loved english. and math! i actually really loved math up until i took calculus. my calculus teacher was horrible, he made you feel stupid for asking questions and he intentionally made the tests too long to finish in a class period and made them extra confusing, it left me in tears more than once. cried at school bc i failed a lot of those tests. anyway i got a 5 on my AP exam for calculus (highest score) so i understood the material, my teacher just sucked and made me hate math after i'd loved it my entire life so ✌️

also loved my theatre classes in high school ahhhh

15. Dream job?

i think something working with cats / big cats / red pandas would be really fun. not a vet necessarily, i don't think i could handle it lol, but like a cat rescue or animal sanctuary maybe??? idk honestly

but yeah mostly agree with the "something that won't drain me and actually leaves me with savings and a will to live" answer. i like my current job/workplace/coworkers a lot more than my last job, but i still don't know if i'd want to be in this field until i retire, that's so many more years and clients sometimes make me wanna bash my head into a wall lol

i have a hard time with the ~dream job~ question bc i've just never felt like i had a "calling" or any overwhelming grand idea with what i've wanted to do with my life, i'm just vibing my way through somehow

Bonus: any significance to your blog's name:

NOPE lol when i was making this blog uhhhh 12 years ago everything that i wanted at the time had been taken and this was the only thing i could think of that i liked that was available and it was just something random 😂 i've thought about changing it but idk it's been too long now LOL

[verkja]

[ID: A colourful collection of icons and images related to tumblr, each animated to switch between two angles, surrounding the words 'tumblr 2022 My Year In Review' in front of an orange grid background. End ID.]

I posted 1,016 times in 2022

That's 1,016 more posts than 2021!

307 posts created (30%)

709 posts reblogged (70%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@i-can-even-burn-salad

@gr8writingtips

@lumpofwhump

@whumpsday

@redwingedwhump

I tagged 1,012 of my posts in 2022

#whump prompt - 187 posts

#writing - 164 posts

#ask answer - 116 posts

#whump writing - 107 posts

#whump tropes - 88 posts

#whump - 76 posts

#30 days 30 lines - 62 posts

#oc stuff - 52 posts

#tag games - 48 posts

#long post - 47 posts

Longest Tag: 137 characters

#which is an english style i don't actually use often - i typically opt for gongfu so very small clay teapots or gaiwans are more my thing

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

How about an older whumpee? One who's lost the appearance of being young and vulnerable, so rather than wanting to help or save them, people just pity or ignore them.

They used to have some kind of hope that their life could get better, but not anymore; now they're just bitter, or resigned, or apathetic. The world and other people have let them down one time too many. They've let themself down one time too many.

They're still scared, all the time, but where once that fear provided an impetus to try and change things, now it just exhausts them. Maybe they try, hesitantly, to reach out for help at some point, but instead of coming across as timid they're just seen as creepy.

Maybe they work for a villain, and while the heroes are inspired to spare or rehabilitate some of their younger colleagues - it's such a waste, seeing people with potential throw away their lives in the service of evil - the whumpee is only seen as an obstacle to overcome. Disposable.

When a younger, conventionally attractive person starts shaking and crying at a meeting of uneasy allies because something someone said brought up a traumatic memory, people are alarmed and sympathetic and want to take care of them. When the one having a breakdown is some middle-aged accountant-looking person, it's just awkward.

Stress ages people, and the effects increase over time. Someone who is actually twenty-five might look and feel thirty under high-pressure circumstances. Someone who's actually forty-five might look and feel sixty-five.

It's a lot harder to break out of a negative mindset when you've been living with it for a long time. It's hard to believe someone telling you things will get better after decades of things only ever getting worse. The whumpee won't bother to argue about it, but they fully expect anyone acting like they care about them to be pretending for the sake of getting information or manipulating them. (Which of course makes it even more intense when someone genuinely does care about them.)

This was kind of a long one, but I really love this setup. Also I was listening to 'No Surprises' by Radiohead yesterday and it kept giving me Feelings.

182 notes - Posted February 23, 2022

#4

Ideas for robot/machine whump; I’m sure some have been done before, but not often enough! I love robot whump.

Dents in metal that cause pain like any other injury, but can’t heal

A character who’s alive and able to think, but the wires which allow them to move or blink a light or otherwise interact with the world have been severed; no one looking at them can tell they’re not dead

A character who could never independently interact with the world in the first place - like a PC, they can only respond upon receiving outside input through very limited means. Even in a room full of people, they can’t detect that they’re not alone, isolated by their own design

Wires that function something like nerves; stripping away the insulation to expose bare copper, which causes excruciating pain when touched even lightly

A character who relies on continual updates to function, getting increasingly glitchy and slow after the company which created them stopped offering support for their now-outdated software

A character who is very much not designed to look convincingly human trying to blend in (think a toaster on stilts in a trench coat)

A company recalling one model of robot for a minor flaw, but fixing the flaw involves a memory/personality reset

190 notes - Posted May 18, 2022

#3

There's something special about a whumpee getting literally thrown in the trash. It's both physical whump, since they're presumably too injured or weak to get out of the trash, and a way for a whumper to symbolically illustrate that they are completely worthless. (Or they can throw themself in the trash, if you prefer!)

It's probably easiest to make this effective in genres where the whumpee is both considered subhuman (or sub-whatever-else) and is legally considered property - a tool, a weapon, a pet, an android, etc. - but it can work in any setting with a bit of modification.

214 notes - Posted March 27, 2022

#2

Seen a few very nice posts lately about ‘known whumpees,’ so I figured I’d write a little about the possibilities of a completely unknown whumpee!

Nobody knows who they are - not because they’re mysterious or disguised, just because they’re no one special. They aren’t part of a team, aren’t a public figure or celebrity, don’t have a family or friends or allies who will show up to help them out.

There’s no practical reason for anyone to help the terrified, forgotten prisoner in the last cell in the dungeon, covered with scars obviously caused by torture. Or the injured soldier in beat-up armour, not an officer or otherwise hard to replace, who surrenders because they’re too hurt to retreat with their comrades. Or the broken, discarded android or robot or pet, just one of a million others, who’s been thrown out because they’re no longer useful.

The character is fully aware of their own insignificance; they know they aren’t worth anything to anyone. So when their fate is left in someone else’s hands, all they can do is hope that person happens to be feeling generous.

411 notes - Posted June 6, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

PSA for newcomers

I've noticed a number of new people posting in the whump tag lately who have migrated over from Twitter. That's great! We're very glad to have you here, and excited to see your content.

Just one request: Please tag thoroughly. Whump contains all kinds of dark content; a lot of people who engage with it are fine with some kinds, but really don't want to see others. Tagging provides a way for people to curate what content they see, and enjoy what you create while keeping whumpblr a comfortable place to spend time.

(If you're new to tumblr and don't know how tagging works here - only the first five tags on your post determine which tags it shows up in, but all tags can be filtered, so you can put #whump and things like that first, and add the warnings near the end. In fact, that's better, because it means whump stories containing abuse, for example, won't show up in the same tag as people's posts about their own real-life experiences with abuse.

Don't censor words or the filters won't work, so 'cw noncon,' for example, is great, while 'cw n0nc0n' or 'cw r*pe' won't do what you need them to.)

Edit: Oho, apparently it's been updated to the first 20 tags these days! Go wild with tagging specific tropes, in that case; that'll make it even easier for people to locate work they enjoy. :D

458 notes - Posted November 18, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[otakween]

Digimon Adventure V-Tamer 01 - Disc-2

Aww, no more full-color chapters this time around :'( it was fun while it lasted. I wonder why this manga never came out in America? I know Digimon didn't make it as big as Pokemon, but I would think it's big enough, no? Maybe they thought the alternate-world Taichi would be too confusing for kids which...fair.

Ch. 11

-This chapter was pretty creepy. The premise (a village going crazy and everyone killing each other) was already low key creepy pasta worthy, but the way the artist draws Zeromaru in crazy/brainwashed mode was pretty unsettling. Not to oversell it, in the end it's a pretty standard "teammates used against each other" plot.

-Something about an evil Patamon is pretty funny. He's too cute to be evil!

-I don't like Demon's design (didn't like his anime design either). The only part that's kinda cool is the "missing data" on his arm and mid-section.

-Seems kinda messed up that the digivice can make a digimon full instantly. Depriving your friend of the joys of eating :'(

Ch. 12

-Another Digimon World-like reference where Taichi talks about force feeding Zeromaru and not cleaning up his poop. Ah...so glad I never have to play that game again lol.

-Is Taichi wearing loose socks? Very 2000s of him. I miss that fad...

Ch. 13

-Digivice abilities so far: scan enemy digimon, transmit data to partner (commands, food, abilities). Seems pretty OP. I hope they don't over rely on it.

-There's a lot of Engrish in this manga ("deep saver," "wake up combination"). I wonder if the random "cool" English in manga motivates kids to learn at all...

Ch. 14

-This chapter was basically all gags and no tags. Just as useless as the Starmon episode in the anime!

-New digivice ability: it can scan books and then upload that info to your partner's brain. Again...kinda OP. Of course, they nerfed it by making Taichi's doodles cause trouble, so I guess it's fine.

Ch. 15

-Edgy rival guy appears! He kinda looks like a discount Killua. He doesn't appear to be brainwashed like Ken? Who knows though...

-TWO digivices!?

No but really, what's the point in having two? That's stupid.

-Another OP power added to Taichi's digivice: It can unlock any electronic lock

-So Etemonkey was wholesome all along!? :'( poor guy. Rival dude said his lifespan is like 120 hours!? Geez I didn't know we were going by game logic THAT much.

-Wow, Jogress evolution! I'm glad I'm reading this after Digimon Adventure 02 or else I might be confused by some of the stuff they're throwing at me with zero explanation.

-Rival guy's name is...Neo Saiba. How am I supposed to take that seriously? Makes me think of Kaiba from Yu-Gi-Oh!

Ch. 16

-Well that got dark pretty quick. Neo sacrifices a Metal Greymon for the sake of collecting data. The fact that the Metal Greymon's only reason for existing was to prove himself to Neo was really sad. RIP.

-So I realize that "Neo Saiba" isn't a first name but a first and last name lol, Idk why I thought otherwise. I guess I'm just so used to hearing digimon with two names at this point.

-Another digivice ability. Apparently you can use it to straight up kill a digimon? (Or "delete," as they worded it). I wonder if it's a real kill or if MetalGreymon gets to turn back into a digi-egg...

Ch. 17

-This chapter got a little violent with Zero bleeding from the nose and mouth and then ripping off Skull Satamon's arms. I bet if you were an 8 year old reading this that would be really intense!

-Apparently anger can give digimon a power boost. I wonder if other emotions have any effect?

-The official release actually ends here for volume 2 which seems weird, but it's because there's a huge chunk of omake materials at the end including C'mon Digimon! I've been reading the scanlations, but I think I'll have to buy the real deal to get that sweet bonus content.

[yvesdeparfum]

yves - fromm log July 2024

translations from Litell_Johnn unless otherwise noted

071524

Yves:

After nail shop I went shopping at Muji and as I came out I met two Engdus in a row How did they recognize me I was squatting down on the street Took photos holding all the stuff I bought ㅋ But usually At places like Daiso or Muji I can be found often I'm an unofficial ambassador '🍎 I'm an unofficial eatbassador at 60 Chicken' Amazing You like chicken?

[6 minutes later]

When's my food cominggg Gonna eat with Buldak '🍎 I'm an unofficial ambassador at Juno Hair. Last year I went at least once a month and sometimes twice' Agh so funny I see everyone has at least one ambassador deal

[5 minutes later]

I'm a house ambassador also My endorphins activate when I get home

071824

Right I'm gong on Oneuniverse.ᐟ.ᐟ.ᐟ.ᐟ.ᐟ I wanna meet Tyla-nim too.. I will practice hard for the festival So that I will not ruin it,,, Let's gogogogogoooo

I see the vlog went downㅜ! Apparently it will probably go up tomorrow because of English subtitling.ᐟ Sorry ㅜㅜ.ᐟ '🍎 I saw a bit of the start and this vlog seems to be edited by Sooyoung-nim, is that right?' Yes I respect the editor-nims so much…. Huuuuueng ㅜ So you saw it already 🥴 So fast..?! You saw the whole thing? ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ I was worried it was no fun as I was making it Gowon just appears Haaa now you're looking forward to it more Don't It's honestly so low-quality Sobb Thanks Wait for tomorrow Also my fingernail got bent today while lifting a package ㅜ Blood streaming down But The bleeding stopped ㅋ Hang in there until festival, fingernail I'm going to another Yveslog filming tomorrow I'll send some Shop Makeup Yibu selfies

071824

Yves:

'🍎 I ate Qooqoo today' Haaa Takes me back to the days when I worked at the Airport Market Qooqoo location Every day I'd be like Ahh ... I burned another one... As I scooped a waffle onto the tray and I'd eat it I'm sorry

[4 minutes later]

Darn it I was telling a funny story Phone turned off So we weren't allowed to serve burnt ones So every day I'd be like "Welp, sure looks like I burned that..." and I would eat one at a time.. I'm sorry But I really worked hard Branch manager-nim No or I'd say I burned it but I didn't Right Back in my day the minimum wage used to be 6k or 7k.. It's all faint~~ in my memory At Shinsa Middle School? Was it I also worked at the Shinjeon Tteokbokki there We'd get entertainment agency orders and stuff The time I saw Kim Yeon-koung-nim was when I worked at Hongdae Dongburi near Hongik University Station I see that there are many newbie Engdus here Everyone don't leave meeeeeee I'll be good to you sobb '🍎 After you finished work at Hongdae did you hit up the food spots??' No Back in my day, after my shift they would be filming Street Date or whatever it was called for Entertainment Weekly and I'd have to wade through all the people

Yves:

'🍎 Did you join the Loona agency through casting or did you audition there' 1 I went to audition through an Incheon vocal academy > rejected 2 Went to the company's open auditions > they cut off right before my turn because they had too many people 3 Auditioned at Gangnam Dream Vocal > rejected A month later, around 10 o'clock, I was leaving academy to go to my acting lesson My instructor said, "The director at the company you didn't get into said he wants to see you again tomorrow~" I went there and it was Byeonggi director-nim I passed on the spot there Then I prepared for debut Right so in the reject folder I was in that pile and he picked me back out As expected of Father Byeonggi director-nim even sent me a massive bouquet when I debuted ㅜㅜ 🥹💗 This is really a secret but It's a secret so I won't do it When I decided to start over as a soloist I called Byeonggi director-nim on the phone and I cried my heart out But director-nim also cried. ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ That's a secret. I mean I was crying while talking about how At any rate gulp sob I was only able to debut during my hard times because blub gulp of director-nim so sob The meaning of those tears are tears of gratitude, that's what I don't know, I think that's how I felt back then After going through a lot of heartburn When I came across someone who listened to my heart That made me cry ~~~~~

Yves:

But seriously we are all together.. Even though we are scattered We can achieve our new dreams where each of us are now And then we can meet againnnn Loona you unpredictable troublemakers I love you '🍎 On a different topic, I'm actually grateful to the people who provoked Yibu at meetings by saying things like "You can't be a soloist" or "You need to be in a group"! Separately from how precious Loona is, it seems like they (unintentionally 😇) gave you a reason to reawaken yourself' Right! I didn't feel hurt even back then On the inside I was like "Darn it who are you to tell me this.ᐟ" thinking that Well no I did feel a little hurt.. ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ But I can just show you going forward Feels new to go down memory lane for the first time in a while I love youuuuuu I don't know if all my feelings will reach you But thank you for caring for me and loving me when I'm such a troublemaker~~~~~~~~~ Thinking back on all this, I realize I really am so happy right now Just like the memorable quote from The Light in Your Eyes, let's live in the present 😊💗 The me of today only exists because of me back then I was so overwhelmingly happy back then, too But I'm even happier now so I don't want to go back~ I'm going to make even happier things happen from now on So it's okay

[mystacoceti]

ZHUCHKA: I find it really frustrating-- not for me, personally, because I don't really have a problem with it, but for the general American reading audience, there's so few [manga] that come out that actually are relevant to current events. Because, like, the simul-publishing stuff [i.e. digital distribution simultaneous with Japanese magazine serialization] is all reserved for the most commercial works. It's really depressing to think-- not only for the art comic stuff, but that people don't read anything that matters to the Japanese audience. They've got to wait for like 10 years, or 20 years. It's ridiculous to me.

It's the precarious situation where really the whole perspective of what Japanese comics is, is still largely controlled by market concerns, because it's all based on what western publishers think is salable. And as a result it's a particular mutation of Japanese comics that goes through, and after a while, the tail starts wagging the dog, where it's all [commercial kids' comics] stuff controlling the direction.

ZHUCHKA: Yeah, I would have loved to do something like this a long time ago, but I just am not the type of person to organize it, and so I was really appreciative and grateful for the opportunity that somebody else would have me on, and then also go through the trouble of contacting everybody and making sure that all that could happen.

[em-dash-press]

The Ultimate Creative Writing Resource List

After writing for quite nearly my entire literate life ~and~ getting a creative writing degree, I've put together a comprehensive list of the sites and blogs that I've found most useful! Check it out, we've got—

An Insanely Detailed Character Creation Sheet: use this page to learn everything you've ever wanted to know about your character and more. It never fails to make me consider something about them I wouldn't have thought of otherwise.

A Character Avatar Creator: if you know what your character looks like and want a visual of them for notes/cork boards/Google Docs, this site will let you personalize them almost as much as a Sims game.

Pinterest: if you don't know what your character looks like and need inspiration, search for pictures of people who inspire you. Definitely have done this more often than not because I can never seem to pin down (pun intended) my character's exact appearance. Really helps with things you might forget while writing, like the shape of their eyebrows, how their hair lays or even how they stand.

A Map Creation Website: it's meant for fantasy worlds but I've used it for my historical fiction novels! Super customizable even without paying for it. It also saves your work in the free version, which has saved me when I forgot to upload copies to where I keep all my story stuff.

Grammar Girl: have any questions about where to put that semicolon or when to use italics? Grammar Girl is literally used by English teachers because it's that accurate. Check your work or put as many commas in that manuscript as your heart tells you to anyway. I've done both!

Grammarly: this is another way to check your grammar, especially if you use the Chrome extension. It automatically checks your basic grammar, spelling, and readability while you type in Google Docs or another browser-based text document. Note that it isn't foolproof and sometimes will suggest things that don't make sense. Use your best judgement when it highlights things!

Word Hippo: do you feel like you've used one word too often in your story? I use Word Hippo daily for both my creative and professional writing to avoid repetition. When I can't think of a synonym or antonym on my own, it has a billion suggestions for adjectives, verbs, nouns, etc. It can even help you find words that rhyme! Make your character a poet. Nothing can stop you.

Text-to-Speech Reader: it's always easier to catch minor line errors when you read something out loud, but if you don't feel like doing that, this site will read your story for you. There are multiple voices to choose from, so have fun listening to your hard-won stories while you edit.

Background Noise—Coffee Shop: I always lose myself in stories when I have this video playing in the background. It's like I'm in a coffee shop or cozy restaurant booth, but without spending money.

Background Noise—Tavern Fireplace: same vibes as a coffee shop, but with fireplace crackling.

Background Noise—Rain Shower: listen to rain patter against your window with some thunder in the background.

Background Noise—Cozy Fireplace and Rain Shower: combine your favorite sounds in this extra long video of a wood-burning fireplace and a distance rain shower. Perfect for anyone who doesn't want to hear extra loud thunder.

Background Noise—Forest Sounds: is your story taking place outdoors? These sounds will make you feel like you're in the woods with your characters.

Background Noise—Blizzard Sounds: constant blizzard winds may easily make you feel removed from the world so you can focus on your work.

Background Noise—Interior Plane Cabin White Noise: the pleasant hum of a plane cabin is what I often write to. There are no loud take-off, landing, or passenger sounds either.

Background Noise—Christmas Music From Another Room: I found this video when quarantining for Christmas with my husband in 2020. It ended up being one of my favorite writing background videos of that year. It features lyric-less songs on vinyl, plus muffled talking, which was a definite perk for the year+ we spent inside.

Background Noise—Lo-Fi: when I'm not sure what I want to write to, I use this playlist. It has the perfect low-key beats for writing less-intense scenes or working on plot, characters, mapping, etc.

Tumblrs With Fantastic Writing Tips: I have a few favorite tumblrs I loooooove and have followed on various blogs for many years. They regularly answer submitted questions and have organized tags, so if you're wondering about something, you'll likely find an answer by searching their blogs! Check out @fixyourwritinghabits @heywriters @wordsnstuff for expert-level help, guidance, and inspiration.

Tumblrs With Writing Prompts: while there are many prompt websites and blogs, my favorite prompt tumblrs are @daily-prompts and @creativepromptsforwriting for their variety and creativity!

Other resources...

Goodreads: consistently reading is part of exercising that creative muscle in your brain. Goodreads will help you keep track of everything you've read, are reading, and want to read. Find your next inspiration and the latest updates on what's coming out soon from your favorite authors.

Poets & Writers Contests: this site is always posting the latest creative writing contests for all genres. It also has free submissions, so don't worry if you can't afford entry fees for now.

The Writer: you'll also find great contests (both free and paid) at The Writer. Explore their site to discover other great resources too, like writing getaways and publishing tips.

---

Enjoy and I hope this helps! Feel free to reblog and add other resources that you use for your writing. I'd love to find more!

[hwang-intak-archive]

A P1Harmony Beginner’s Guide

Since I’m seeing lots of new people taking an interest in P1Harmony these days, I thought now is the perfect time to make a little guide like this that might help a few of you with getting to know the boys better^^

Guide Masterlist

Music Videos:

Siren

Breakthrough

Scared

Do It Like This

Do It Like This English Version

Gotta Get Back (feat. Pink Sweat$)

Doom Du Doom

Music Show Stages:

All Siren Era Music Show Stages

All Scared Era Music Show Stages

All Do It Like This Era Music Show Stages

Some Covers & Performances worth checking out: everything they do is worth checking out imo, but I can’t link every single thing they’ve ever done here skldajfölkads

Maniac (Conan Gray Cover)

Good 4 U (Olivia Rodrigo Cover)

At My Worst (Pink Sweat$ Cover)

Shine (Pentagon Cover)

Our Beloved Medley Vocal Cover

Billie Eilish Medley Dance Cover

(everything else is under the cut, because this got a bit long)

More fun stuff to watch: (in chronological order)

♢ Self Introductions [Keeho & Theo, Jiung & Intak, Soul & Jongseob] Basically what the title says, also shows how distinct their characters are very well! + they get to showcase their drawing skills (?)

♢ Stream Highlights from their appearance on Ara TV In which they eat, chat, and Keeho burps on live television. (I realize this doesn’t have eng subs so... if you’re learning/can speak Korean you’re welcome (?) Otherwise just watch them be cute uwu)

♢ Lunar New Year’s Celebrations 2021 Watch P1Harmony playing traditional Korean games and occasionally losing their minds a lil :’)

♢ A series of little interviews in collaboration with Wonderwall This is unfortunately pay2watch, but I wanted to link it anyways because these videos are what really made me fall in love with P1Harmony fully, plus they give a nice insight on their working process as well as the boys’ thoughts and feelings. By now you can find the full episodes on yt as well, if you have trouble finding them let me know and I can send you the links^^

♢ Hard Training Team [Ep 0, Ep 1, Ep 2, Ep 3, Ep 4] A fun little series to start getting to know their personalities!! Tbh all of their series are worth watching, you can check my series guide for those^^

♢ Secret Friend of Idols In which they play games fighting for regional Korean food and also Intak curses. 

♢ P1Harmony takes a lie detector test This speaks for itself tbh. Also Soul wants to see the world burn.

♢ To 2022 P1Harmony The Piwons sending video messages to their future selves!

♢ Weekly Idol Way too much happened here...

♢ Poster & MD Making Film for their first Tour Watch them being very handsome~

♢ P1Harmony building an Ikea shelf I will certainly not hire them to build any furniture for me whatsoever.

Vlives:

Until the end of 2021 they did so-called “partner vlives”, where they’d always pair up and do one or two scheduled lives within a certain amount of time. I thought since they’re fun to watch and eng subbed (mostly anyways...) I want to link a few here^^

SeobKee Age (Keeho & Jongseob) A father and one of his sons making food together.

JongJi-Boo (Jiung & Jongseob) INTJ-line giving life advice.

PlanTHEOing with Soul (Theo & Soul) They’re trying to grow plants and have close to no idea what they’re doing.

Dance Machine (Jiung & Intak) Half of dance line covering a bunch of songs and freestyling.

Ohyaho (Keeho & Theo) Two extroverts setting marshmallows on fire.

SaeTakSoul (Intak & Soul) Them making Dalgona candy and Intak doing 90% of the work. (But Soul is still being very cute so it’s all good~)

Some P1H Blogs to follow:

So you can fill your dash with the boys~ There are obviously a lot more blogs who post about them on here, but I wanted to give a selection of P1H-only blogs^^

@choi-taeyang

@choitaeyang

@huangintaks

@hwang-intak​

@hyunhun-88​​

@incorrect-p1h​

@jiung-s

@jiungweb​

@kee-ho​

@piwonies​

@stephen-yoon​

@tebaragi​

Guide Masterlist

more short guides per era: Siren Era Highlights - Scared Era Highlights - DILT Era Highlights

[finelinevogue]

he’s so vogue

Description - you are the journalist for the new Harry Styles December Vogue Issue

A/N - how is everyone doing? hope you enjoy! if you have any requests please feel free to ask. love you all and have a lovely rest of the week!

warnings: swearing

[masterlist]

Being a journalist for Vogue was probably the biggest flex you could ever make.

After 3 years of studying English Literature at Surrey University, you never thought, only a year after, you'd be working as an apprentice at Vogue UK. If it weren't for your Aunty, who worked in the fashion design section at Vogue HQ, then you'd no doubt still be a broke-ass, single, lonely student. Ok, lonely you still were but your job was so full-on that you didn't have time for a relationship.

Two years into your apprenticeship you were promoted to an official member of the team, and then another two years later you got promoted to team leader in your department of journalism, and editing; The Media - or as you like to call it - "The Celeb Goss". You were beyond happy with your job and found such passion in every article your wrote. Whether it be about a new celebrity romance or the collapse of one, you found a way to story-tell in such a meditated way that everyone loved your pieces.

That's why the Harry Styles had requested you to be the one to interview him.

Of course you'd written about A-list celebrities in the past, producing articles on pregnancy rumours, or engagements, or breakups, but you'd never met them before authoring an article. You'd met plenty of D-list celebrities who thought they were mega famous, but if you mentioned their names people would turn around and ask "who?".

This is why interviewing Harry Styles was a massive thing for you.

Not very often did you get to do work out in the field, especially in these covid infested days, but nevertheless it was your favourite part of the job. Getting to meet the people you were writing about was completely refreshing, allowing you to obtain a clearer outlook on which direction to take on your journal piece.

You were asked to go to Stonehenge, where the photoshoot was being filmed, as your office of interview. Even though you'd lived in the UK all your life, you'd never actually been to Stonehenge. It wasn't really on your bucket-list, but it was a pleasure to get to see it all the same.

Being the prepared interviewer you were, you'd prepared an array of questions that you were set on asking Harry. You'd never met him before, but after much googling and youtubing of him prior to meeting him today you would already be confident in saying he's the most brilliant man to ever exist. You were really nervous that you were going to screw this interview up and make a terrible mess in front of Harry Styles.

"Lisa! What if I accidentally say something I shouldn't?" You ran your stressed hands through your hair.

This whole morning had been frantic. It had started off by you waking up late, no thanks to Lisa, your best-friend and co-worker, pressing snooze on the alarm. You wanted to look professional today so you'd put on your best shirt - only to spill coffee down it ten minutes later. So now, you smelt of coffee and were wearing what was left in your wardrobe - and it wasn't much. The only things left clean were a pair of pink corduroy flares and some, pastel coloured, graphic t-shirt to go with it.    

"You won't. Stop being so negative." Lisa rolled her eyes, probably fed up with the amount of winging she'd heard from you this morning - and you'd only been awake an hour.

"My outfit is hardly professional either." You huffed, pouring the rest of your, second, coffee down the drain.

"Well I think you look gorgeous." Lisa stated, whilst putting her breakfast bar wrapper in the bin.

You and Lisa were back and forth about you stressing, and such, for about half an hour before you had to leave. You had a great panic about losing your glasses too. You could see without them up close, but for long distance viewing and reading you were practically blind. You were taking Lisa's car, since she didn't think you were emotionally stable enough to drive. Lisa was the creative director on the set, and thank goodness she was so you could at least ramble to someone.

After a two hour drive up from London, you arrived at Stonehenge and it was freezing. Although the sun was out, it did nothing to keep your body heated. The journey up had been nice because you sat in your nicely heated car, chatting away with Lisa and blasting some Harry Styles out of the speaker. You'd made it through the first album, and the second one up to Canyon Moon before reaching your destination.

Upon arriving you could just about, without glasses, make out about 15 other cars, arranged at the bottom of a hill. There was an array of Audis and BMWs, a few Range Rovers, which you placed your bets on one was Harrys, and a green, vintage, Jaguar which was most likely belonging to the fashion editor or something. There was also a modern barn, perched at the foot of the hill, which was where Harry would be getting changed in to his various different outfits.

It took you a moment to register that Lisa had parked and was already clambering out of the car, making you look a little idiotic still blankly staring at the beautiful scenes in front, and around, of you.

But it was still bloody freezing.

You jogged a little to the boot and whipped out your white cardigan. Originally you'd thought that this would've been enough to keep you warm, but now you were starting to think otherwise.

The atmosphere here was amazing. People were rushing around left, right and centre loading, and unloading, various pieces of equipment and clothes. You caught sight of brightly coloured fabrics being carried to and from various places. There were the camera crew, and presumably director, all chatting amongst themselves. The smell of the very fresh air was so lush that you'd forgotten what it smelt like - especially after years in London.

You grabbed your bag from the boot, which had your notes, recording kit and laptop stuffed inside, before locking the car and following Lisa in to the barn.

It was lovely and warm inside - a completely different climate to than the outside. It was as if it was Bali inside and Antarctica outside. Better Bali than Antarctica though.

"Ok. Let's put our stuff down over here and then go find people we need to meet and such." Lisa instructed, you still too in awe of the place to fully comprehend what was going on.

You followed Lisa and you two ended up dropping off your stuff next to some other bags. You took a liking to the purse next to your stuff. Next to your bag, it made yours seem ancient - like it was worth nothing more than a penny. It was luscious and a beautiful baby blue colour. You softly ran your hands over it, finding satisfaction in how smooth and subtle it was.

"Hope you're not planning on stealing that, love." A manly voice appeared from behind you. You whipped around to see who's bag you'd been messing with, and it was just your luck that it was to be Harry Styles'. Of all the people's it could've been it had to be his. 

Perfect.

He looked dashing. He was in black flares and his iconic 'But daddy i love him', t-shirt, along with a huge green anorak. His hair was prettily clipped back with a pink clip, presumably placed there to gave his curls greater volume. In his hand he had a pink toothbrush and you guessed he'd come back over to put it away in his bag - only to find you caressing it instead.

"Oh - no, no. Not at all. I - uh - I just thought it was beautiful." You stammered over your words, choosing them carefully to try and make you look less like an active criminal.

"Mhm." Harry nodded whilst looking you up and down, most likely judging why a peasant like you, in comparison to him, was touching his expensive property. "Well, I love your flares darlin'." Harry looked down at your trousers, his compliment making you blush a little.

"Thank you. That wasn't professional, and neither is my outfit, I know, and I apologise." You added, because you knew that if your boss knew you turned up today the way you did she would give you a right bollocking - and potentially even fire you.

"Never apologise for flares. You look amazing." Gemma perked up, making you feel more self conscious surrounded by all these other beautiful women. Gemma was in a slouchy, knitted, jumper and basic jeans - no doubt all from shops beyond your budget - and yet she looked like a model fit for the runway for Vogue.

"Okay, sorry." You apologised again, to which you, creepily, got the exact same, stern, look from the Styles siblings at the same time.

"My stylist, Harry, introduced me to big pants. He offered whether I wanted to try a pair of flares, and I was like, 'Flares? That's fucking crazy'!" Harry laughed as he told his story, earning a laugh out of you too. "Now they're my favourite item of clothing. Have a whole wardrobe dedicated to them."

"I wish he was joking." Gemma laughed at her brother and his flare obsession.

"Well you do look handsome in them, so I understand why." Your words rolls off your tongue before you could even comprehend what you were saying. Only after you finished your sentence did you completely intake what you'd just said.

"Good start." Lisa giggled to you, before turning to walk over to the coffee station. It was a help-yourself coffee bar and you knew that you were going to bed at least five cups to get over the last five minutes alone. You'd probably drain the station before letting anyone else have any.

"Oh god." You awkwardly mumbled, not daring to see how weirdly Harry would be looking at you, before walking off outside.

You had spent less than 10 minutes here and yet you'd never felt like a bigger clown. Joining the circus had never been so easy.

The outside wind hit you like a powerful leaf blower, and your hair blew around like crazy - most likely compiling into a birds nest on the top of your head.

Today was supposed to be the start of something great. Your hopes were set on a promotion from your written masterpiece, whilst enjoying the company of one of the most handsome, most lovely, most talented men of this century. Those hopes seemed a little too distant now. They seemed to mock you, as if to laugh at how you ever thought you were going to be any more successful. You'd completely, in more ways than one, made a fool of yourself in front of your interviewee, you were so underdressed, you were caught fondling his Gucci purse and you were still bloody cold.

It all felt too unprofessional for a job where professional was practically the driving force of the company.

You leaned against the barn, taking a deep breath to try and calm yourself. You were a master in over-thinking, but unfortunately that wasn't something you could add to your resumé. You let your eyes close and the other senses come alive for a few moments. The sounds of distant sheep and the smell of the cold wind were just two of the senses that allowed you to take a step back for a minute, and breathe.

"Thank you." A voice interrupted you from your attempt of quick meditation. You looked to your left and noticed Harry standing there, still in the same outfit as before.

"I'm sorry?" You asked confused, taking a step away from the barn to considerately pay more attention to him.

"Thank you - for saying I look handsome in flares." He repeated, smirking when he added the second part.

"Oh." Was all you could respond, feeling too embarrassed to take the conversation any further. "I should—" You pointed back to the barn, using it as an excuse to leave before yet screwed up anymore.

"Lisa told me you're the interviewer." Harry added, and it only occurred to you that you'd never actually introduced yourself. "So it's lovely to finally meet you Y/N." He stuck out his hand for your to shake, which you did willingly. His hands were a lot softer than you'd expected.

"Ho... You know my name?" You asked surprised.

"Of course. I also know you're the best writer in Vogue right now." He flattered you, which made you blush. You had a feeling he'd make you do that a lot today.

"Sure." You rolled your eyes as you spoke sarcastically.

"Well I chose you for a reason, didn't I?" He rhetorically asked.

"I mean.. I, well.. I don't know?" You stumbled over your words, making yourself look like a larger fool than you did already. Today was just turning out to be exactly what you didn't want it to be. "Sorry."

"Stop apologising. You do it too often." He told you, nearly making you apologise again but he gave you a jokingly stern look, as if he knew what you were going to say, and so you decided otherwise.

"Harry!" You both turned to see there was a man waving towards you both, but specifically to Harry. "Come get changed!" The same man shouted. Harry lifted his thumbs up, as if to signal he'd be there shortly.

Harry turned back to you and noticed you shiver a little.

"I'll start the interview after I come back from the dressing rooms, yeah?" Harry asked, taking off his, khaki green, trench-coat in the process. He handed it to you before you could oblige against it.

"Wait what?" You confusedly looked down at the coat and back up to Harry.

"Gives me a piece of mind knowing my interviewer isn't going to die of hypothermia before actually interviewing me." He smiled, obviously attempting to crack a joke and you have to admit you did laugh.

"Thank you." You say, before he runs off to where he's being called to.

                                                            ••••

You'd been sat inside for a little while, waiting for Harry to come back. It gave you time to perfect your questions though.

Thinking up questions to ask Harry had been a challenging task, but one that you'd been fully invested in. You loved creating questions to ask him that were going to get to understand him on a deeper level. He was a very private man, and you completely respected that. If you crossed any boundaries, with the questions you'd ask, you would write them out of the interview. You liked to think you hadn't thought up a question that would make him feel uncomfortable though.

Pissing off Harry would be on another level of shame.

"Coat kept you warm?" Harrys voice disengaged you from your notebook.

"Hm?" You asked then replayed what he'd just asked in your mind. "Oh, yes. Thank you very much." You stood up, from where you'd been perched on the floor, picking up your nearly finished green tea as you did so.

Only when you stood up did it come to your realisation that Harry was now in costume. He was dressed in luxury. Each item looked like it cost more than your rent, and that was saddening. He looked rich and luxurious. To be quite honest, you were finding it rather difficult to take your eyes off him.

"You think the outfit is Vogue enough?" Harry asked, striking a few poses, which made you laugh. It was refreshing to see him act so relaxed and carefree, rather than a stuck-up-prick you knew some celebrities to be.

"Completely. I love it!" You exclaimed, appreciating the twirl he did for you.

He was wearing a kilt-like skirt and he looked beyond beautiful in it. Fuck toxic masculinity. Fuck being a manly man - like what does that even mean? Harry was embracing gender fluidity and experimenting the ways in which there was no definitive line between men and women's clothes anymore, and you thought it was marvellous. Revolutionary, for times as politically and socially troubled as these.

You started removing the coat in attempt to give it back to him, but he refrained you from doing so by holding on to your forearm.

"Keep it. I thought we could go outside to start the interview, so you'll be needing that." Harry told you, and you agreed - however reluctantly that was. You couldn't really complain though, because the coat did kept you warm and, what's better, it smelt divine - just like you'd imagine Harry to smell.

"Okay. Thank you. Do you want to go now?" You asked hesitantly, not knowing whether he was busy for someone else right now.

"Whenever you're ready, love." He answered, making you feel more relaxed. He was going at your pace and was making you feel settled - he was even more of a gentleman than people described him to be.

The two of you had walked around the backside of the barn in silence, enjoying the comfort of each other's presence. Well, at least you were. It was a blessing no one was back here. It was just you, Harry and the scenery that surrounded Stonehenge.

You approached a bench and you plopped yourself down on one end, whilst Harry sat on the other. He respected the fact that there was a pandemic going on, and didn't want to make you uncomfortable in any way. You still had your mask on, so Harry had taken that as you were very conscious about the virus - which he admired.

You pulled out your glasses, from the depths of one of the coat pockets, and placed them on your face, probably making yourself look even geekier than you already felt. Today was just one of those days you wished you had good eyes...

You opened your spent notebook, musty pages practically falling apart, and turned to the section of questions you needed for that interview. You were so nervous already and you hadn't even asked anything yet, all because of the previous interactions with Harry today. Your shaky hands shuffled through the pages and you cursed under your breath when you struggled to find what you needed.

"Shoot. Come on." You mumbled quietly under your breath, hoping it would make this terrible situation end faster. You mustn't have been as quiet as you thought though.

"Y/N." Harry's name broke through your clouded mind of self-disappointment.

You looked up at him to see him softly smiling at you, blowing all worries away from you away with the wind. "Yes?" You timidly asked, pushing your wind-swept hair out of glasses - where it'd gotten caught.

"You’re alright, love. You don't have to be professional around me, alright? We're just two strangers having a conversation, to get to know each other, okay?" If his words didn't calm you enough, the soothing sound of his husky voice certainly did.

"But that would mean you asking me stuff too?" You replied, confused at his implications of the phrasing 'getting to know each other'.

"Mhm." Harry nodded his head.

"Oh I don't know Mr Styles, i'm not a very interesting person." You answered as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, pushing your glasses back up the bridge of your nose from where they'd fallen.

"I refuse to believe that." Harry chuckled, making a quick smile appear on your face. "And please call me Harry. Just Harry." He begged, obviously finding it weird you calling him by his professional title. All you wanted, ever, was for your interviewee's to feel comfortable and safe, so if Harry wanted you to call him Harry then so be it.

"Ok, Harry," you sarcastically said, earning a shake of the head on his behalf, "you can ask me a few questions throughout the day." You told him, but you knew he'd struggle to find even two questions when he realises how bland you are.

"Does that mean you only get to ask me a few as well?" Harry smirked, already knowing the answer to that question. Unlike Harry, you had to write an article about today when you got home and so he knew that you'd have to dig as much dirt as possible from him.

"No, sorry. I don't particularly want to lose my job." You paused to look down at your notes, squinting a little as you did to see better. "Okay. Tell me your experience with corona virus."

"Sorry I didn't quite catch that, love." Harry apologised, leaning in slightly to see if he could hear you a second time around.

"Sorry." You looked down to fiddle with your fingers - a habit you'd undertaken when you're embarrassed. "Um..," you cleared your throat, "would you mind if I took off my mask?"

Your timid voice sent tingle down Harrys spine. He didn't think anyone could ever be this sweet. "Not at all, ‘course you can." He replied, again, wanting to make you feel as comfortable as possible.

You hesitantly took off your face mask, feeling like you were in some dramatic movie where they face revealed someone. You kind of liked having the mask on, because, for one, it kept you warm, and for two, you were a little self conscious with how you looked compared to all the other women here today. You shoved the mask in your pocket, with trembling fingers, before looking back down to your notes.

"Woah." You heard Harrys voice being mumbled under the wind. You eyes shot up to his and you noticed him staring right back at you.

"W-what? Is my acne playing up? I knew I should've—" You self-consciously run your hands over the areas you know you got acne. The masks really didn't help when it came to skin care.

"Hey, stop. No. You just... You look beautiful." Harry complimented you, and a roaring blush arose on to your cheeks. You'd never been called beautiful before, and so you were taking the compliment like such a 13-year old.

"Oh, uh, thank you." You awkwardly answered, not really having any other words come to mind in that moment. Harry chuckled under his breath, still keeping eyes on you for some reason.

"Would you mind repeating your last question, I didn't quite catch it?" Harry asked politely.

"Sure. Um, tell me how you've experienced corona virus." You repeated for him, gripping ahold of your pen to start copying what he says and pressing start on your recording device in case you needed it later.

"Well, it's been tedious that's for sure. However, I just want people to be safe and for life to return back to normal, so therefore i've been very MIA for a lot of the time. Keeping to myself mostly. I only went out for hikes or bike rides. All my meetings were online, so it's been very lonely." Harry kept eye contact with your figure the entire time, and if it weren't for you concentrating on writing what he was saying then you'd probably melt away under his gaze.

For such soft eyes he sure was intimidating.

"I presume the loneliness sent you crazy at times." You laughed, because you sure felt that way through lockdown. Curse being single.

"You have no idea." Harry laughed along with you, making you, slowly, feel more at ease.

"Actually, you'd be surprised." You looked at him unsure, before returning down to your notebook.

"Okay then, first question from me," Harrys words made your head shoot up, "How can someone as amazing as yourself be lonely?" He asked and you made a mental tally of how many questions he'd asked.

"Could ask you the very same question, Harry." You slyly replied, avoiding the question by answering with another question. It was a tactic you'd learnt, throughout your years of journalism, when you wanted to dismiss something .

"That's cheating." Harry pointed at you and raised his eyebrows, but you couldn't take your eyes off the big, cheeky, smile perched on his face. You shrugged you're shoulders in defence and returned to your questions. "But you did just call me amazing, so I think i'll let it slide this one time." You blushed, again, when you understood what he meant.

He was amazing though - that was the truth.

"You were in L.A. for the majority of quarantine, am I right to say?" You already knew the answer but your manager had just wanted confirmation.

"Yeah, but L.A. feels like holiday, whereas London feels like home." He answered, which you appreciated. He hasn't got lost in the way that Hollywood could let people. He'd stayed grounded.

"So what did you entertain yourself with during quarantine?" You asked curiously, slightly side-tracking from your pre-written questions - just because you were intrigued (nosey).

"Not much, not to be boring. I ate a lot of bread. I worked out pretty much every day. I wrote quite a bit actually." He used his fingers to pinch his bottom lip, something you'd noticed he did in interviews.

"Does that mean a new album on the way?" Your inner fangirl was screaming at the thought of HS3.

"Can neither confirm nor deny." Harry smirked to himself, like the cheeky bugger he is.

"That's a yes then." You joked, pretending to write it down in your notes.

"You're impossible, you." Harry laughed and shook his head. It made you feel all funny the way you could make him smile like that. You were the source of his happiness for just that moment, and that was enough to make you feel happy for a lifetime - not that he felt the same.

"Next question," you stated, moving swiftly on because you knew you had limited time, "How's your experience with Vogue been so far?"

"Wonderful. Everyone has been so welcoming and that makes it so much easier for me to have fun. It's daunting going at things alone, but i'm getting slowly used to it now." Harry sniffled a little, probably due to the freezing cold weather here.

"Must be strange, not having four best friends around you, all the time, anymore." You stated rather than asked him, sure that he was missing his bandmates. I mean, you were - so he definitely would be.

"Brothers." Harry replied, making you look up at him confused.

"I'm sorry?" You asked, giving him your full attention.

"You said four best friends. Well, actually they're my brothers." His words actually caused a rift in your heart. You could feel it being pulled apart and torn in to two. If you wrote this in to the magazine the fans would have a worldwide passing-away-party.

"Harry." You said softly, slightly tearing up at his words. "God, I swear i'm not normally this emotional." You chest your throat and try to establish your dignity - however there wasn't that much left anymore.

"Oh shut up." Harry looked away obviously trying to hide the fact that he was tearing up too. You laughed at him but didn't draw any more attention to it than you guessed he would've wanted.

"They mean a lot to you then?" You asked, hopefully not treading on any unwanted territories.

"Much more than a lot, yeah." Harry nodded his head, turning it back to face you. He could tell this conversation was now off-the-record because of your closed notebook, your undivided attention towards him and the fact you’d turned off the recording device. He liked being able to look at you, rather than the top of your head. He swore you were the prettiest girl he'd ever seen.

"You still see them often?" 

"Not as often as i'd like. Niall did come around the other week to drop off some old guitars he didn't want anymore, and then we ended up playing around with some music for a bit." He admitted, which stitched your heart back together.

"So does that mean a Narry collab?" You teased, biting your bottom lip in anticipation.

"Narry? You so are a directioner." He laughed along with you.

"And you just avoided my question, therefore there is a song out there written only by you and Niall." You concluded, which shut him up.

This conversation was going a lot better than expected. Certainly a lot better than earlier. You will be permanently scarred by the way you spoke to him and handled his belongings. It was going to haunt you forever - and yet he'd forget about it by tomorrow. Or maybe he wouldn't, which is why you felt the need to apologise.

"Harry?" You asked, clearly indicating this was still a conversation away from the interview.

"Yes Y/N?" He watched you intently, listening to your every word.

"I, um, just wanted to apologise for my behaviour earlier. I was just really nervous to meet you, and to be honest still am. I didn't mean to touch your stuff without your consent and I certainly didn't mean to make you uncomfortable with any of my comments. So, i'm sorry. I can only imagine the awful, yet true, things you must think of me." You rambled really quickly, that you were uncertain whether Harry even caught one word of what you'd says.

"Do you know why I asked for you to interview me Y/N?" Harry asked, which wasn't the first thing you expected him to say after your apology.

"No. I...well Lisa told me it was because I can write well or something." You suggested, not wanting to sound egotistical.

"I mean you do write perfectly, but no." You were intrigued now. "I asked for you because I, and this is not for your magazine, have a secret - but not-so-secret - crush on you." This time it was Harrys turn to blush.

"Harry... you don't have to say that to—"

"I'm not saying it for anything. I sincerely think you are the most delightful, most prettiest, most fucking sweetest person i've ever met." Harry exclaimed, which you were taken aback by. Never, ever, did you think that Harry Styles would proclaim his likeness towards you. Ever.

"Harry don't mess with me, please." You shyly spoke, tilting your head down in disbelief that the Harry Styles was smitten about you.

He shuffled along the bench, stopping a little way from you but close enough to reach out for you. Your heartbeat increased when you noticed his hand move closer towards you. It didn't stop till he reached your face. He took his time, courteously, pushing your hair behind your ear before removing you of your glasses. He held the right-eye frame and slowly pulled the glasses off your face.

Once he'd successfully taken them off he folded them up and placed them alongside your closed notebook.

"Can see those pretty eyes now." He whispered quietly, but loud enough for you to hear.

"Don't lie. They're so dull." You mumbled, lifting your head up slightly. His face was still away from you.

"Not to me they're not." He retaliated, looking deep into your eyes as you did his. "I hate this corona virus."

"Why?" His words were so out of the blue sometimes, it gave you whiplash.

"Because I can't be as near to you as I want to be." Harry told you. And yeah, you hated corona too. It was getting a little laborious now.

"Smooth, Styles." You chuckled. You wondered how many new and weird pick-up lines could be made from covid. 

"I know." He winked, which honestly would have made you throw up if it were any other man on the planet. Somehow, though, Harry just made it seem attractive - along with every other thing that man ever did. "After this, would you like to come back to my house for a cuppa tea?" He asked sweetly, like a five year old asking whether you wanted to play together.

"Okay. Lisa was my ride though." You said more to yourself than anything else, debating on how you'd even get to Harrys. Uber? Taxi? Lisa? Walk?

"I'll drive us, it's fine. I have to drop Gem off, but i'd be more than happy to chauffeur you." Harry kindly offered, to which you were internally screaming about. You were literally, and metaphorically, having a field-day with all this Harry content and interview.

"Are you sure? I don't want to be a burden." You question politely, not wanting to overstep any boundaries - especially in these covid infested times.

"Of course. I wouldn't have offered otherwise." He protested, waving his hand at if to say it was no bother. You were already trying to work out, in your head, how much petrol money you were going to owe him.

"Then i'd be honoured to have a brew with you Harry." You giggled at how cringe you were being, even if this was just your normal self speaking.

"Great." Harry genuinely smiled, teeth and all. "My shoot should take a couple of hours, but feel free to continue to write and journal. I'm looking forward to reading this particular article." He winked at you before standing up.

"Wonder why?" You sarcastically asked, knowing full-well it was due to his exposure of his own feelings towards you. Even though you'd never says anything back you were quite in agreement on how you felt about him, like he did you. He would be a narcissist to say he knew you liked him the same, out loud, but he knew. And you knew that he knew.

"Wonder why indeed." He gave you one last smile before he'd disappeared for the rest of the afternoon, leaving you to digest and relive the past half an hour or so.

Being Harry Styles' crush was probably the biggest flex you could ever make.

                                                          ••••

After Harry had finished up his shoot he was quick to come find you again.

You'd watched parts of his shoot and he looked magnificent. There wasn't a good enough word to describe how amazing he looked. Harry, his stylist, was probably the best stylist out there. His fashion choices were unmatched and you wanted him to be yours. You were not rich enough nor fashionable enough, ironic for working in a a fashion company, to hire a stylist, but you would if you could.

You were so proud to see what he was achieving now as the person that he was. Harry was just being Harry, without the devilish control of shitty managements or ridiculous amounts of PR stunts. Harry was more free than ever, and it definitely showed just how much he was enjoying it.

You were certain that this Vogue magazine would break the internet - his fans were good at doing that. This could be a turning point for many people, with their outdated and ignorant views. There was no room for people with racist or homophobic or transphobic or xenophobic - and the list does go on - views anymore.

You were waiting by the front door of the barn, to catch Harry as he walked past. You caught sight of him in a white robe, presumably to get changed back into his everyday clothes. He looked really pretty in the robe - very domestic actually.

Today had been a good day.

Harry asked you to send over the more specific Vogue questions to him via email, so he could devote more time in to answering them in a lot more depth. You thought he meant you'd be sending them to some PA in his team, but you were shocked to understand he'd given you his personal email.

People were walking back to their cars and packing away the filming kit. You saw Lisa and the director talking to one another, no doubt discussing some in-work gossip.

"You ready?" Harrys voice reminded you that you'd been waiting for him. You looked to see he was back in the same clothes as this morning, only this time without his coat.

"Here?" You offered, having him over the coat once again but he declined.

"Looks better on you anyways." He winked at you, before walking through the car park and to his car. You were very surprised when you found out Harry was the one to own the green Jaguar. You assumed all celebrities drove the Range Rover, but no. The vintage car added to Harrys immaculate vibe and just made him that little bit more hot.

Harry properly introduced you to Gemma, who was equally as lovely as Harry. They were both amazing people and they were crazily alike. From the way they looked, down to the way they phrased their words, they were mistakingly twins. Gemma explained how Anne, their mum, didn't know they were doing this photoshoot and that it was going to be a surprise, which you thought was so cute.

Gemma spilt a lot of gossip on Harry, to which he got very embarrassed over. You learnt that Harrys first word was Cat. You learnt that Harry is godfather to multiple children, which you found heartwarming. You learnt Harry used to be a baker - which was something he elaborated on for a good half an hour. Harry was just a fountain of memories and Gemma was the one sharing them all with you.

The drive back to London was relaxed. You sat in the back, listening to Harry and Gemma pointlessly argue whilst an Arctic Monkeys album played in the background. You forgot that people like Harry drove, and listened to music, just like other regular people. You often misplaced celebrities in society, thinking they had everything done for them but in reality that (often) wasn't the case - at least not for Harry.

Gemma was dropped off quickly before Harry drove to his. It was no surprise that the Styles siblings didn't live too far away from each other. Harrys house was beautiful. Bigger than anything you could ever dream of buying. It was a palace compared to your cupboard-sized house. You were unbelievably jealous. He gave you the tour of the house, showing you where the toilets were, and even his panic room if necessary.

You migrated to the kitchen for a bit, talking about anything and everything. Getting to know the minuscule pieces of information that no-one else was trusted with, made you feel special. Harry made you feel special - even if he weren't meaning to.

Every moment held a spark. Every touch set off a firework. Every laugh was an electric burst. He made you feel so alive.

"We can go to the living room after this has boiled." Harry said, pointing towards the streaming kettle. He wanted to show off his fancy tea collection he had, and let you have a try if you wanted to. Harry was boring and chose the basic green tea, but, after much deliberation, you chose the cranberry green tea. It intrigued you and it sounded delicious.

"Why the extensive tea collection?" Not even you, a certified caffeine addict, had this much tea in your house. Coffee was a different story and one in which you didn't want to talk about.

"They help me with my meditation." He took the teabags and placed them in his glass mugs. They had a delicate Gucci stamp on them, and you just imagined that they probably worth the same amount as your daily salary.

"You meditate?" You were slightly surprised that he did.

"I try to yeah." Harry nodded, focusing on pouring in the boiling water into the mugs. "I've got very tight hamstrings and so it helps if I meditate twice a day."

Harry finished making the tea, in the light-filled kitchen, before showing you around to the open-lounge area. Everything was modern and chic. It was exactly how you imagined it, but better. The open, red-brick, wall was a beautiful feature and one that you were a whore for! It reminded you of New York and the memories you'd made there one summer.

The sofa was a beautiful velvet, green, sofa. It was soft and gentle, a lot like Harry when you thought about it. The whole house was an architectural masterpiece and you'd be lying if you said you weren't jealous. You sat on one end and Harry went to go and sit on the other end.

"I don't bite you know?" You joked, self-consciously wondering whether he didn't want to be sat near you.

"I know, I just don't want to step on any of your covid boundaries - which is perfectly fine by the way." He added, apprehensively taking the spot next to you.

"No, not at all." You ushered him to sit next to you, as you took a sip from your steaming hot cup of fruity tea. "If I smell though, do tell me!"

"Yeah, you smell bloody awful!" Harry sarcastically remarked, but laughing afterwards to assure you he was joking. The atmosphere went quiet for a minute, only the sounds of passing cars and deep breaths being heard.

"Y/N can I ask you something?" Harry turned the tone of the conversation. It sounded like he wanted to be more serious than you two were being beforehand.

"Anything." You encouraged him to continue. You placed the cup of tea down on the table, deciding it was too hot to drink right now, and gave him your full attention.

"Do you believe in love at first sight?" Harry questioned. You didn't think you'd be having a conversation this intense - especially if you had different opinions - on your first day of knowing each other, but here you were.

"I believe you can love someone at first sight. I don't believe you can be in love with someone at first sight. Why?" You were curious as to how his brain had journeyed to this particular topic. You'd never really had this conversation with anyone before, mainly because you were unaware of the true power, and meaning, of love.

"It uh... It doesn't matter." Harry shook his head and you could tell by his body language that he was shutting you out. Maybe you'd made him uncomfortable.

"Sorry I didn't mean to—"

"No, no. Please don't apologise. It's just - I like you a lot more than you may think." Harry shyly told you, which made you all soft inside. He was being vulnerable and that was something you admired in a partner. You didn't just need love, affection and trust in a relationship. No. You needed vulnerability and heartbreak too, and Harry was revealing that part of him to you.

"I like you a lot more than you think too." You repeated, not because you felt bad for him but because you truly did like him a whole lot. Love was a weird yet wonderful thing, and if you were to hazard a guess you'd say you loved Harry. 

You couldn't wait to be in love with him.

"Does that mean I get to crown you my girlfriend?" Harry excitedly asked. Harry happy was something that should be made a constant, and you were more than happy to be in control of that.

"At least take me out first." You bargained, wishing for nothing more than to go on a date with Harry. Where you'd go, you had no idea. Everything was closed right now and there was still the chance of becoming sick with corona, but no doubt Harry would think of something not only clever, but special.

Of course you'd love to be Harrys girlfriend. However, you wanted one more, official, opportunity to really get to know him - unprofessionally. You wanted to make sure that you knew, and he knew, that you wanted to be with him because he was the charming Harry you've come to love, not because he was Harry Styles.

"So you're allowing me to take you on a date?" Harry smirked like a little child, your heart fluttering at how excited he was to be able to treat you to dinner.

"Yes, Harry. Yes I am." You answered sweetly, offering him the cutest smile you could.

You can't believe what a turn of events today has been. You've gone from nearly writing yourself on Harrys enemy list to writing yourself on to his 'people he's dated' list. Who knows what the future would offer you. At the start of the day you had wished this whole day to end and for the ground to just swallow you up, now you never wanted it to end. It was too perfect to be true and yet it was.

Harry was the most wonderful human to exist and you were beyond surprised to be the one to catch his attention. You didn't understand why you were so special, but it was nice to feel like this for a change. It was nice to feel wanted.

                                                             ••••

A few months later and you were officially Harrys girlfriend.

It had been such a crazy few months. Harry religiously took you out on dates every week. Whether it be to grab a hotdog at a local diner, a coffee from a quaint cafe, a walk in Hyde Park or a late-night drive around London - which normally ended up with you falling asleep before you could make it back to yours. On sleepless jet-lagged nights he'll still drive through London's quiet streets, seeing neighborhoods in a new way, just as an excuse to spend time with you.

Harry often stayed over at yours. Even though you looked like you lived in a shoebox compared to Harry, he liked it. He liked the subtly and normality of it all. He wanted your life to remain as normal as possible and, apart from the occasional paparazzi incident, it did. You never had anything to complain about. Of course the online bullying created emotional wounds, at the start of your relationship, but it was nothing that Harry couldn't repair with a bit of love.

Lisa has nominated herself to be maid-of-honour when the day comes - if the day comes. Harry has already pinky sworn that you are it for him. The one, as some may say. You were utterly flattered, but you certainly unsure of what the future help for you both.

You loved Harry, you do love Harry and you will forever always love Harry.

It was ridiculous to think that all this stemmed from you working at Vogue. From you studying English Literature in a city away from London. From you dedicating you extra hours gaining work experience and money to be able get in and afford university. So many moments in life have you stopped and said 'i wish i hadn't have done that', but now you were convinced that they were the best things to have happened to you - because they lead you, all, to Harry.

And, being Harry Styles girlfriend was probably the biggest flex you could ever make.

[albertasunrise]

Hey!! I don’t know if you take requests but I had this idea that I thought I would share with you as I noticed you live in the UK. It would be about an English girl who moves to the US and meets the Triple Frontier guys (obviously falls for Frankie) and the guys always take the mick out of her accent and the way she says things (just little things like car park instead of parking lot, bin instead of trash can etc.) but her response is always “where am I from? England? Yeah so I’m right” 😂 and then maybe we get some baby stuff (which you write beautifully) and the girl can’t believe you have to pay to have a baby in America. With a sprinkling of angst thrown in for good measure somewhere!

British Beauty

Masterlist - Request Masterlist

Summary: After moving from England to the US after a bad breakup, you find more than you bargained for.

Relationships: Frankie Morales x Reader

Warnings: Like AO3 I choose not to post any warnings. Will give the story away.

Notes: LOVED THIS IDEA... Also... I'm half Canadian so my friends are constantly correcting how I speak so I can totally relate 😂 hope you enjoy!

You met Ben first. It had been your fourth month living in Texas and you'd decided to take your chances in a bar down the street from your apartment. Your friends had been telling you since you'd arrived that you had to try a sports bar so after a little wandering you'd found one a block over.

It was busy but not loud. Two large screens hung above the bar, one playing a hockey game and the other a sport you were familiar with growing up. You had sat at the bar, ordered a cider and watched the race, practically screaming at the TV as if Hamilton would be able to hear you from where he sat in his driving seat.

"That British driver's pretty good huh?" Ben had asked, stepping up beside you with an empty jug in hand.

"Six times world champion." You'd replied, turning to see one of the most beautiful men you'd ever seen smiling back at you.

"A fan of the sport then?" He asked and you nodded enthusiastically before looking back at the screen.

"By the time I was 2 I could name all the drivers and what they drove." You'd stated proud, smiling sweetly at him as your eyes wandered back to him "It's a big deal back home."

"British hmm?" Ben had asked and you nodded "Whereabouts?"

"West Country." You answered with a smile and he look perplexed "I'm from a city called Bath."

"Like bathtub?" He's questioned and you'd chuckled and nodded.

"Sorta, yeah." You'd replied, "We do have some famous roman baths in the city centre."

"Wow, that's pretty cool." He had said as he nodded at the bartender to refill his jug "You here alone?"

"Yeah." You'd replied with a shrug "Moved here a few months ago and haven't really had a chance to make any friends outside the office."

"Join us." He said sincerely and you had given him a questioning look before seeing nothing but sincerity in his expression.

So you'd accepted his offer and joined his friends. Santi, the short but sweet. Will, Ben's sweetheart brother and Frankie. You saved the best for last.

Francisco Morales was something else entirely.

He was a little rough around the edges in appearance and yet, he had a softness to him that drew you to him like a moth to a flame. His hair was longer than the others, curling at the ends and a warm chocolate colour. His eyes were dark and sparkled in the dim light of the bar and you had felt yourself mesmerised by them like you could look into them for the rest of your days.

You'd been pretty gutted when you had learned he had a girlfriend and then you'd found yourself cursing yourself for hoping otherwise. He was perfect in every single way but you'd figured this was probably the one and only time you'd hand out with them all so you had suffered in silence for the rest of the evening.

How wring you'd been.

~

One year later...

Will was holding his annual barbecue and the boys had invited you. As they did to all their major events now. You were excited at the prospect of chilling with your friends after the hellish week at work you'd just had. You weren't, however, looking forward to spending another evening pining over a man you could never have. It was just the four of you, Santi having returned to Australia a few weeks after you met him but you liked it that way. Being closer to the Millers.

"Right we have burgers." Announced Will as he clapped his hands to grab everyone's attention "We have sausages, ribs, wings and because Queeny here requested them, we also have baked potatoes."

"They're called Jacket Potatoes." You corrected and the boys scoffed.

"You and your weird sayings." Ben teased "It's a car park..." Ben started in a mock English accent "Not parking lot."

"Oh..." Started Frank, putting on his own English accent "You couldn't possibly take out the rubbish bags for me would you?"

Ben and Will barked and you scoffed.

'What language do you all speak?" You asked and they all stopped laughing.

"English," Ben answered and you snorted.

"And where am I from Benjamin?" You pushed and his eyes narrowed.

"England..." He trailed off and you nodded at him with a cocky grin plastered across your face.

"Oh yes... that's right... the inventor of the language you speak." You stated "Which meaaaaaans... I'm right and you're all wrong." You finished, blowing them all a kiss before skipping off to the kitchen to fix yourself a drink.

"Damn she's hot." Groaned Ben, watching you waltz away and the others chuckled at his reaction.

"She's also soooo not into you." Will teased and Ben groaned.

'No... She's into Catfish." He grumbled under his breath, not realising he'd been heard.

"She what?" The older man exclaims, stopping Ben dead in his tracks "She likes me?"

"You seriously telling me you never noticed how she looks at you?" Asked Will and Frankie just gave the brothers a bemused look "Shit." Will breathed as he shared a look with his brother "God she looks at you like you hung the stars man. The night we met her and you told her about Lucy, her face literally fell."

"I didn't know," Frank said softly and Will sighed.

"Well, you do now." Will stated and Frank nodded "Just don't give her hope where there is none man."

You remerged a few minutes later with a tray of drinks and the boys all smiled sweetly at you. That was just you in a nutshell. You thought of them always and as you handed them the drinks you fetched them, Frankie couldn't help but pine after you.

"So where's Lu?" You asked as you placed the tray down on the table beside you "Surprised she's not here, she's usually throwing herself at the opportunity to chow down on Will's famous wings."

"We uh... Well, we broke up." Confessed Frankie and everyone looked at him in shock.

"What happened, brother?" Asked Ben and Frankie sighed

"We uh... Well after we lost the baby, things kinda started to fizzle I guess." Frankie started and your brows knitted together as he continued "She was being distant. Going out with friends more and getting back super late. Thought nothing of it at first but then I managed to cut my shift short on our anniversary and thought I'd surprise her." He paused, scraping a hand over his mouth before taking a large swig of his beer "Walked in on her shagging her boss."

"Fuck." Will clamoured and Ben gasped in shock "I'm so sorry brother."

"Yeah well..." Frankie started, letting out a breathy sigh "I guess we were pretty doomed for a while. Losing a kid does that to people sometimes I guess..."

"Losing your baby does not justify her cheating on your Frankie." You piped up and his eyes locked with yours "Yes she lost her baby but so did you... and yet you stuck by her. Shows what kind of person you are." You said sweetly as you gave him a small sympathetic smile "You deserve better than that."

His heart started to race as you pulled him into a friendly hug. He'd been taken from you from the moment he'd met you but he had been with Lucy and so those feelings had been pushed aside. Now though, things were different. He had a chance to see if there was something there.

He owed it to himself to try.

So after the barbecue, he worked out a plan. He'd been single a month and so he knew he needed to give it a little time before he jumped back into the dating poo but he knew when he did. He wanted to swim with you.

So as days merged to weeks and then to months he started to arrange more nights with you. Drinks with the boys became drinks with just the two of you and he found that the more time he spend with you, the more he wanted to pull you into his arms and kiss you breathless.

"So how are things with you?" You asked softly as you took a small sip of your drink "Been on any dates lately or..."

"Dates?" He questioned, brows drawing together "Why would I..." He trialled off, his stomach twisting a little as you chuckled.

"Well, you've been single a few months now." You stated with a shrug "I figured you'd want to get back out there."

"Oh... right." He replied and you noted his sudden change in tone

"You been dating?" He asked and you shrugged slightly "Been on a few." You replied and his heart dropped through the floor "Seeing someone at the moment but I dunno."

"Right."

"You okay?" You asked and he nodded unconvincingly.

"Yeah." He replied as he downed the last of his drink "You want another drink?" He asked, ignoring the concern plastered across your face "I need another drink." He continued to ramble "Same?"

You didn't get a chance to answer before he was up and making his way to the bar. He ordered your usual along with a beer for him and a tumbler of whisky that he downed before making his way back to the table. He could see that you were texting and he felt his jealousy bubble under the surface but he pushed it to one side as he sat back down across from you.

"Here's your weird, English, drink." He grumbled and you smirked at him.

"You can get cider wherever Frank." You snorted.

"Sure." He replied and you felt yourself growing a little irritated at his sudden change in attitude.

"What the fuck is up with you?" You snapped.

"What?" He growled and you rolled your eyes.

"I asked you if you'd dated anyone and you went a little quiet and then I tell you I'm seeing someone and you..." You trailed off as you piece it all together and your eyes drifted up to his.

"Frank-"

"Save it." He pleaded, holding his hand up to stop you "Save me the embarrassment, please... Clearly, the boys were wrong."

"Wrong about what?" You asked and he sighed.

"They told me you like me but clearly they were wrong so-"

"I do." You interrupted and his mouth dropped open "I really like you but you were with Lucy and then..."

"It's fine." He sighed "I'm too late... I get it Queeny. It's getting late, should probably head."

"Frankie-"

"It's fine... really." He said sweetly and you sighed "Want me to walk you home?"

You nodded. Glad in the knowledge that he wasn't just going to abandon you in this bar so that he could lick his wounds. He waited for you to finish your drink and then walked in silence beside you to your apartment. When you reached your door, you turned to face him and your heart sank at the sight of him down and dejected.

"Look... Can we just forget about everything that happened tonight?" He begged, "Rather the boys not know I was painfully shot down."

A tense silence fell over you both as your eyes remained locked.

"No." You said, shaking your head slightly "No, I can't."

"Please I-"

He was interrupted by soft lips slanting over his and Frank moaned into the kiss as his arms wrapped around you to pull you closer. It seemed to be over much faster than he would have liked but as you both pulled back to look at each other, he found himself lost in your eyes.

"I don't want to forget."

~

One year later...

It had been one whole year since that night and you hadn't parted since. You had broken it off with the guy you'd been seeing the following day and that evening you were riding Frankie on his couch whilst the boys sent text after text, wanting to know exactly what had happened between you both.

Your romance had been a whirlwind that had moved so fast for all the right reasons. Within a month you were living together and after four you had drunkenly asked him to marry you.

You were officially engaged a week later.

He had been everything you'd ever wanted and you were the same for him. The love you shared was all-consuming and despite his constant correcting of everything you said, you knew he was the man you wanted to grow old with.

"Baby, have you seen my handbag?" You shouted to Frank as you desperately tried to find the last few things you needed before you left.

"What the hell is a handbag?" He yelled as he sprinted up the stairs and you rolled your eyes at him as he walked into your shared bedroom.

"You know, the bag you shove your shit into when we go anywhere."

"You mean your purse?" He continued and you groaned.

"This is a purse." You snapped as you waved it in his face.

"Babe, that's a wallet."

"Men have wallets." You corrected "Women have purses that they carry around in their handbags."

"Whatever." Frankie chuckled as he placed a peck on your cheek "It's on the couch."

"You mean the sofa?"

"Baby, we're going to be late." He warned and you sighed.

"Fine. Let me just grab something from the bathroom and I'll meet you by the door." Frankie kissed you sweetly before making his way back downstairs again and you watched him leave before making your way to the en-suite. You grabbed what you were looking for and skipped out of the room and down the stairs, shoving it in your bag along with your purse and keys.

"Ready?" He asked and you nodded.

"Let's go."

It took but ten minutes to get to Will's from the home that you shared with your love. The Millers had planned a celebration for your anniversary despite the two of you protesting. You had wanted to spend it in, eating pizza and watching shitty TV but when a certain piece of news reared its head you decided that perhaps a celebration with your favourite brothers and Frankie wouldn't be so bad.

Stepping through the gate that led to Will's back garden, you were greeted by balloons and a banner having from two trees. It was all too much and it all screamed Benjamin Miller.

"Cat, Queeny, you made it!!" He practically shouted as he held his arms open for you both to hug him.

"Wouldn't miss our own party Miller." You said playfully as you poked him in the ribs.

"Whatever Will's cooking smells amazing." Frankie piped up as he pulled you into his side.

"You know my brother. Any excuse to show off his skills." Ben chuckled and you both grinned at him before following the younger Miller to the couch.

He handed you a glass of wine and Frankie a beer before the two of you sat down on the plush cushions and you cuddled into Frank's side.

"So how is the wedding planning going?" Ben asked, his eyes snapping up to see Will walking out with a tray of food.

"Yeah, it's going okay." You said, glancing at Frankie "Pretty much decided on a venue and such, just the date we need to decide."

"Well, you're going to need a few months to plan, surely?" Will asked as he placed a plate of food in front of you.

"Yeah." You replied, nodding your thanks to him before sitting forward to eat.

"Cheers." Declared Will as he sat down beside Ben "Happy Anniversary to the two most deserving people I know."

"Soppy prick." Ben teased and Will slapped his arm gently "Happy Anniversary guys."

You all ate in relative silence then, the food rendering you all speechless but when it was all finished and cleared away, you settled back into your seat and basked in the warm evening sun.

"You haven't touched your wine." Frankie pointed out as he sipped on his second beer of the evening.

"Haven't I?" You said innocently and his eyes narrowed before shrugging and taking another swig of his drink.

When Will and Ben returned from the kitchen, the four of you settled around the table you pulled the box you'd shoved into your bag out and held it in your hands.

"Want your present?" You asked, pulling Frankie's gaze.

"I didn't think we were doing presents?" He asked as he looked at you a little panicked.

"It's just a little something." You said as you handed him the box, chewing your lip as he lifted the and pulled back the paper.

His eyes widened as he looked at what had been hidden beneath that teal tissue paper before looking up at you with a mixture of shock and joy.

"Really?" He asked and you nodded, smiling sweetly at him before he put down the box and pulled you into a bruising kiss.

"Really what?" Ben asked before leaning over the table and grabbing the box, staring long at hard at the contents "You're pregnant?" He exclaimed and you both chuckled.

"Yeah." You breathed "We're pregnant."

"Well, that explains why you haven't touched your wine." Will teased and you grinned at him.

~

7 months later...

You'd had a small ceremony a few months after that evening at Will's. Santi and his girlfriend had flown over from Australia for the occasion, and your family from England.

Your dress had looked perfect with the small bump you had developed almost overnight and your parents had gushed over you and Frankie all day, overjoyed you'd found someone after all the heartbreak you'd suffered.

Now you found yourself holding the new life you'd created in your arms, smiling down at him as he slept soundly in your arms.

"Damn he's perfect." You said softly, taking your eyes off of your son so you could look at your Husband.

"So's she." He said as he smiled down at his daughter who was also sleeping soundly "So perfect." He finished before placing a soft kiss on her brow.

When you'd learned you were having twins, you had freaked but Frankie had been over the moon with the news. He's lost one, now he was being blessed with two at once.

Frankie's head snapped up as a nurse poked her head in the door, motioning for him to follow her and he placed one final kiss on his daughters head before placing her in the clear cot beside your bed.

"Just going to sort the insurance." He said sweetly as he kissed you softly.

"I still can't believe it costs money here to have a baby." You scoffed and he gave you a bemused look "In England, all you pay for is parking... Which is extortionate I will add."

"Well, luckily we have insurance hmm?"

"Still crazy." You snorted and he grinned at you.

"Sure it is baby." He said before kissing you one more time.

You watched him leave before returning your gaze to the little boy in your arms.

"It's fine though." You said after a short pause "You two are worth all the money in the world."

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(GO TO PART 2 AND PART 3)

PART 1

I’ve been meaning to do this for a while and just never got round to it, but figured now was finally the time!

This post is basically a bunch of random trivia and references for OHDH based on stuff I’ve researched when writing. There are a few things in my next couple of chapters that I thought warranted further explanation if anyone is interested. And well even if they’re not, it’s handy for me to refer to when I no doubt forget things 😂

I’ll keep adding to it as much as I can, including going back to older chapters whenever I think of anything.

1. The bombing in Madrid that happens whilst Horacio is living there in chapter 6 actually happened in real life in 1992, which is the year I placed Horacio in Spain.

2. The crucifix necklace that features throughout the fic was based on the chain we see around Carrillo’s neck in the scene below (and the screencap doubles as a nice bit of eye sex as well 😉). I just headcanoned it had a cross attached to it, seen as we see him praying with Trujillo and I think it’s highly likely he had a Catholic upbringing in Colombia. 

3. Linking on from the above, thanks to this post I also found out part-way through writing the fic that there was a prop necklace made for season 2, but we never see it on screen (we were robbed!!).

I don’t know if this is the same one from season 1, I suspect it’s not otherwise why would the auction not mention that? Plus the one above appears to be silver (although the lighting is terrible in that scene so who knows?!). 

The auction page says the following about the prop, along with a charm bracelet:

Now, I haven’t been able to fathom out what they mean re: the charm bracelet tbh. Because the first time we see it is when Steve goes to dinner with Connie in The Enemies of My Enemy:

He gives it to Connie to give to Olivia, but Connie tells him to keep it because he needs the luck. This scene takes place after they visit Juliana Carrillo, but what I don’t get is a) Why would Steve still have it after visiting Juliana if he was supposed to give it back to her? and b) If it is supposed to be Carrillo’s, what was he doing with it when he died? Because he clearly wasn’t wearing it lol. I can only think his wife/daughter gave him it for good luck and he just carried it around on him, which is a thought I have a lot of feelings about 😭❤️

Anyway...I digress lol. As for Carrillo’s necklace, I ran with the auction site saying the medallion is of a deity, and after falling down multiple research holes, I found out there is a Colombian deity called Bochica. 

Bochica looks like this:

I went through all of the Colombian deities and to me, the medallion looks most like Bochica out of all of them.

Now, this is where I lost my mind slightly. Because Colombian mythology states that Bochica is the God of morals and laws 👀👀 So, I can only assume it was a deliberate choice by the writing team/prop department to include Bochica on Carrillo’s necklace. Which makes it even more of a crying shame that we never saw it in the show! 

Linking back to OHDH for a second, as I’d already given Horacio the crucifix necklace by the time I was aware of this prop, in chapter 14 I decided to add a second one that belonged to Horacio’s dad instead. And it may make another appearance in a future chapter 😉

4. In chapter 13, Horacio talks about celebrating Día de las Velitas every Christmas (the candles in the guesthouse were his own tribute to it). It translates to ‘Day of the Little Candles’ in English and is celebrated on 7th December in Colombia. In the same chapter, Javier also mentions Las Posadas which is celebrated in various Latin American countries and Mexico between 16th and 24th December. 

5. In chapter 13, the song on the radio at Chucho’s celebration meal is Look At Us by Vince Gill. Because the lyrics just felt apt for where Javier and Horacio were at by this point of their relationship ❤️

6. If you want an idea of what I had in mind for ranch!Horacio in chapter 13 (when Javier can’t control himself in the kitchen 😉), this is basically it:

This is Maurice Compte in There is a New World Somewhere (which you should definitely watch if you haven’t already btw) and even though I wrote a damn fic about this film lol, I had forgotten he wears this outfit. And it wasn’t until I went looking for gifs of Maurice wearing jeans (because I just couldn’t imagine Horacio wearing them for some reason 😂) that I realised he was basically ranch!Horacio 👀

7. The scenes between Horacio and Chucho in chapter 15 were slightly inspired by the fact that both Maurice Compte and Edward James Olmos starred together in Mayans MC. I remember watching Mayans early last year after I’d started OHDH and could not believe my luck, because their interactions in that were kinda how I imagined Horacio and Chucho (although Chucho doesn’t at any point attempt to kill Horacio, unlike their respective characters in Mayans 😂). The scene of Horacio drinking on the porch and of Chucho covering Horacio with a blanket were nods to similar scenes the actors shared in Mayans MC. 

8. Speaking of Edward James Olmos, in chapter 15, Horacio finds a book on Javier’s shelf called With His Pistol in His Hand by Américo Paredes. A film adaptation was made of it in 1983 called The Ballad of Gregorio Cortez starring none other than, you’ve guessed it...Edward James Olmos. The detail of Javier and Horacio watching the film serves no purpose other than a fun Easter egg for my own amusement tbh 😂

There are also a few other literary references in the same scene as the above that I thought were kind of apt: Rosario Castellanos (a Mexican author/poet), One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel García Márquez, Giovanni's Room by James Baldwin

9. In chapter 15, Chucho talks about making an altar for Mariana each Día de Muertos, which translates in English to the Day of the Dead and is celebrated in Mexican culture on 1st and 2nd November. 

A large part of my inspiration for this came from a book called Everyone Knows You Go Home by Natalia Sylvester which I highly recommend. 

10. Whilst on the subject of other books I’ve read that have inspired me for this fic, here are a few more (and I’ll add any others I read in the future): 

Like This Afternoon Forever by Jaime Manrique

Fruit of the Drunken Tree by Ingrid Rojas Contreras

Under the Mesquite by Guadalupe Garcia McCall

11. In the opening scene of chapter 16, Chucho is cooking with a Mexican spice called epazote. And ok so this is really random, but I have to thank this interview with Tony Dalton (Lalo from Better Call Saul) who is from Laredo, for educating me on the existence of this spice. He talks in that interview about how he schooled the BCS writers on authentic Mexican cooking and got them to change a line in the script to include epazote. So, I thought why not use it here when I’m writing about characters in Laredo?! Frijoles de la Olla is also a Mexican bean dish that uses epazote in the recipe. 

12. In the scene where Javier and Horacio reunite, I kind of had the bottom gif from this post in mind, which is a scene from another Maurice Compte film called I Do. Obvs Horacio is wearing a cowboy hat as well, but you get the idea 😉

13. In chapter 16, when Javier tells Horacio everything about Los Pepes and Bill Stechner, I expanded on the canon detail that Bill Stechner was an instructor at the School of the Americas and was involved with conflict in Nicaragua, and decided that it was highly likely Horacio and probably Javier as well, would have received some sort of SOA-related training. 

As is so often the case, I got sucked down a research rabbit hole and ended up reading this book: The School of the Americas: Military Training and Political Violence in the Americas by Lesley Gill

This was an interesting paragraph that made me think of a certain scene in Narcos, I can’t imagine why 👀

14. Chapter 16 is named after Like a Prayer by Madonna because it just suited the mood and also, some of the lyrics are so them ❤️

15. The show sets Javier’s and Horacio’s trip to Tolú in December 1989, but never specifies a date. My anniversary with my husband also happens to be in December, so in chapter 17, I may have given them the same anniversary 😳

EDIT TO ADD: Erm, the show actually did specify a date for their trip to Tolú. And you'll never believe which date:

For some reason, I only noticed this in August 2023, so there you are, they actually do share my anniversary based on canon's timeline of events 👀👀👀

16. The song they dance to in chapter 17 is Can’t Help Falling in Love by Elvis Presley. I kind of need to do a shoutout to The Killers for covering the song and planting the idea in my head to use it here after setting up in chapter 15 that Javier kept Mariana’s records in his bedroom ❤️

17. The poetry book Javier gifts to Horacio in chapter 17 was heavily based on An Anthology of Spanish Poetry: From the Beginnings to the Present Day, Including Both Spain and Spanish America by John Armstrong Crow. I particularly wanted to include Federico García Lorca because he was a gay Spanish poet, who was tragically assassinated for his socialist political views. 

18. Thank you to this post for helping me figure out that ‘Mi hogar’ was the right Spanish phrase for ‘My home’ ❤️

19. There’s also a callback in chapter 17 to Horacio discovering Javier’s copy of Giovanni’s Room by James Baldwin in chapter 15. Weirdly, I included this detail before I read or knew anything about Swimming in the Dark by Tomasz Jedrowski, in which the gay main character bonds with his boyfriend over Giovanni’s Room. The way I SCREAMED when I read Swimming in the Dark, having already included a reference to Giovanni’s Room in chapter 15 👀👀

20. I’ve already mentioned Las Posadas in chapter 13 and seen as chapter 17 takes place a year after chapter 13, I thought I’d go into more detail about the celebrations. You can read more about the significance of the piñata and various traditions here and here.

21. Chapter 17 mentions Día de los Reyes Magos, which takes place on 6th January and closes out the festive season. Rosca de Reyes (Kings’ Loaf) is a type of sweet bread traditionally eaten on this day.

22.  Fiesta San Antonio is references in chapter 17 and is an annual festival that takes place in San Antonio every April. Cascarones are a tradition at the festival, where confetti-filled eggs are cracked over the heads of your friends and loved ones (I loved discovering this fact!).

23. I did a lot of reading about Madrid and Spain for chapters 18 and 19, so I’ll talk about the books I found the most useful here:

Snow on the Atlantic: How Cocaine Came to Europe by Nacho Carretero

This book was INVALUABLE in helping me link together Spain and Colombia with regards to drug trafficking (of which I knew nothing about beforehand, funnily enough). In fact, it’s now my headcanon that this is what Horacio would have been involved with when he was exiled to Madrid in the show lol. Galicia is a region of Spain where drug trafficking clans operate and they ship product in from Colombia to distribute through Europe. Weirdly, I saw a news story about this in the UK the other day (April 2023) where traffickers were using submarines to smuggle cocaine off the Spanish coast, so this kind of thing very much still goes on!

There was also a line in the book about Pacho Herrera visiting the clans in Galicia back in the 80s/90s, so that’s where I got that line from in chapter 18.

Operación Nécora is covered in the book, but you can also read more about it here as well (this was another namedrop in the conversation between Horacio and Álvaro).

The Book of Casey Adair by Kevin Harvey

A book about gay characters living in Madrid in the 80s – perfect research! I do have more to say about this one, but I’ll save it for after chapter 19 has been posted.

For any Pedro fans interested in A Strange Way of Life that’s coming out later this year, Pedro Almodóvar gets mentioned quite a bit in this book!

Without a Second Thought: A Memoir of Life in Franco's Madrid by Diane Lorz Benitez

This was a memoir of an American woman living in Madrid in the 70s and 80s, so just at the end and immediately after the Franco regime. Again, I will say more about this book after chapter 19 has been posted.

24. The bombing that killed Álvaro’s brother, Jaime, is based on the one that actually happened in Madrid in 1993. Please note I have not based Jaime on any of the real victims; the date of the bombing just fit the timeline of the story.

25. El Retiro Park exists in real life Madrid, as does the Fuente del Ángel Caído (fun fact: it sits 666 metres above sea level 😈), the Palacio de Cristal, the lake and the Monument to Alfonso XII.

26. La Semana Santa is Holy Week in Spain, which begins on Palm Sunday and ends on Easter Sunday. If you’re alarmed by some of the outfits shown in that link, don’t be, as they came first and it was a certain white supremacist group who did the cultural appropriation.

Some of the foods referenced in chapter 19 are traditionally eaten during La Semana Santa. Here are a few recipes: Espinacas con Garbanzos, Croquetas de Bacalao, Bartolillos Madrileños, Buñuelos de Viento, Flores Fritas and Torrijas.

27. I previously mentioned reading Without a Second Thought: A Memoir of Life in Franco’s Madrid by Diane Lorz Benitez (see point 23). In chapter 19 of OHDH, Señora Romero talks about hiding people from raids back in the days of Franco. This book references such raids by Franco’s men during the Spanish Civil War and explains how the porter in the author's apartment building used to hide people like this. So, given the age of Señora Romero, I decided she would have been in Madrid around this time and it felt fitting for her character to have put her neck on the line for others.

28. While on the subject of historical Madrid, I also previously mentioned reading The Book of Casey Adair by Kevin Harvey (see point 23 again), which follows a gay American postgrad student living in Madrid at the start of the ‘80s. It focuses largely on his personal relationships and sexuality, the political upheaval in Spain around that time and also the HIV/AIDS crisis.

I cried my eyes out at the ending, and it got me thinking about my own fic. When I first started it, I wasn’t expecting it to become so detailed with history and realism beyond what we see in Narcos, so I didn’t plan on talking about HIV/AIDS at all. But now we’re here and research has become a big part of the process for me, so even though I didn’t want it to be a significant subplot (because there's enough going on already), I wanted to at least acknowledge the existence of HIV/AIDS in a story about bisexual men set in the ‘80s/'90s. And I think it adds another layer to the sense of relief Javier and Horacio are feeling now they’ve come through the other side of everything ❤️

29. In chapter 19, the phone call between Javier and Chucho delves into their family history and gives a bit of backstory about how Chucho’s and Mariana’s parents came from Mexico to the USA. The following book about repatriation of Mexican and Mexican-American people from America in the '30s has been an invaluable resource and I couldn’t have written this scene without it: Decade of Betrayal: Mexican Repatriation in the 1930s by Francisco E. Balderrama

30. I chose Cattleya orchids for Trujillo's wedding, as it's the national flower of Colombia.

31. The church where Trujillo gets married is the same one seen in The Sword of Simón Bolivar (season 1, episode 2) where Javier is anxiously waiting for news from Helena (also just feel the need to say I'm obsessed with the framing of this shot below, it has subtext written all over it lol):

It's the Iglesia del Señor de las Misericordias and the below picture shows the balcony Javier and Horacio talk over more clearly:

32. I included several Colombian wedding traditions in Trujillo's ceremony and the reception (disclaimer: I'm not Colombian and unfortunately have never been to a Colombian wedding, but I've tried my best with research and appreciate some people may do things differently). The candle ceremony, arras coins, mantilla veil, the shoe game and belt contest, La Hora Loca, the bride and groom having godparents (padrinos and madrinas) rather than bridesmaids/best man, Trujillo's guayabera and bandeja paisa are all referenced here and here.

33. Feria de las Flores is a festival of flowers held in Medellín every August.

34. Jardín Botánico de Medellín exists in real life, and really is a stone's throw away from Iglesia del Señor de las Misericordias. However, I may have taken artistic license with the Orquideorama (the orchid canopy under which the reception is held). It does exist as below, but it wasn't actually built until 2006 lol:

I'd already decided on the botanical gardens being the reception venue, then I saw someone's beautiful wedding photos and decided I had to have the Orquideorama and the tables amongst the trees ❤️

35. I won't link each dish separately, but for most of the wedding food, I used this Colombian recipe site for ideas.

36. Cumbia is the national dance of Colombia, so I had to include it in chapter 20.

Lucho Bermúdez was an important influence in cumbia music and you can listen to Tolú here.

I've had a hard time tracking down the origins of Noches de Cartagena. It seems to be one of those old traditional songs that everyone has done a version of, e.g. here's one version that sounds very different to this one. So take your pick!

37. Given Javier's background, I wanted to include something from the Tejano/Texan music world as well: Laura Canales was a Tejano musician and Hank Locklin made country music.

I also want to mention this piece written by a gay Texan man about dance hall life and his sexuality. It's so beautifully written and the lyrics to a Hank Locklin song called Please Help Me, I'm Falling certainly hit different from a queer point of view. Immediately after reading this piece, I wrote Javier's memories of dancing in chapter 20.

38. If anyone didn't already know what shirt stays/garters are, you're welcome:

They're commonly worn in the military/police, apparently, so I figured there's no way Horacio would put up with an untidy shirt 😉

39. Carolina García Velásquez, who is mentioned in the final scene of chapter 20, is the innocent bystander killed by accident in the La Dispensaria raid. The show didn't give her a name, so I did, just to give Horacio some closure really.

40. For some strange reason, the show never gives Trujillo a first name. So, in the OHDH universe, he's called Felipe, just because I thought it suited him tbh lol.

41. I don’t think I’ve ever really mentioned the fact I decided to kill off Horacio’s dad lol. The only reference to Carrillo’s parents in the show seems to be this one-off line by Escobar when he’s having his bitch-off with Horacio over the phone:

So, this suggests in canon, Carrillo’s parents are very much alive and well. But in the OHDH universe, I liked the parallel with Javier losing his mother (seen as it’s very heavily implied she’s no longer around in the show, and I believe the mother of the real life Javier Peña died too) and helped to develop the thread of grief running throughout the fic.

42. I established in chapter 17 that Horacio’s family live in Manizales. So, once I started researching the city and discovered it’s part of the coffee growing region of Colombia, the idea of the coffee farm in chapter 21 just sprung to mind.

43. La Leyenda del Mareco (The Legend of the Mareco), which Horacio tells Javier about in chapter 21, is a story from Antioquian folklore that I came across in my research.

44. The sudado de pollo recipe cooked in chapter 21 is based on this one and this one (for some reason, the voice of the chef in the video totally reminded me of Juliana Carrillo’s lol).

45. The line in chapter 21 about Madrid being good enough for Simón Bolívar stems from the fact he lived there for two years and married a Spanish woman named María Teresa Rodríguez del Toro y Alaysa.

46. The references to La Violencia (The Violence) relate to a civil war that took place in Colombia between the Conversative and Liberal Parties in the ‘40s and ‘50s. Given how old I placed Horacio and Eduardo, it fit that Eduardo would have been a serving police officer around this time, and I liked the parallel of him being as morally conflicted as Horacio ended up becoming.

The Colombian military and the CNP were largely on the side of the Conservatives, and were up to their necks in brutality and corruption (police officers who were known to be Liberals were also kicked out of the force). So, for me, it kind of puts the outrage/surprise in the show at Carrillo’s more extreme methods in a new light, because plenty of police officers/soldiers before him did a lot worse lol.

Ironically, a lot of those displaced in rural areas by La Violencia fled to cities like Medellín and that's how Comuna 13 was born, which obviously went on to become a victim of Escobar's violence.

Some books I read that add a lot more context about this era:

In Evil Hour by Gabriel García Márquez

Blood and Fire: La Violencia in Antioquia, Colombia, 1946-1953 by Mary Roldán

47. Speaking of Gabriel García Márquez, the line Javier quotes to Alejandra in chapter 21 is from One Hundred Years of Solitude (“We came,” they said, “because everyone is coming.”). In the book, it comes after a railroad is built to Macondo (the fictional town the story is set), which sees the beginning of capitalist imperialism in the town as the American banana companies take over and exploit the Colombian workers.

The line before the one Javier quotes is: “Look at the mess we’ve got ourselves into,” Colonel Aureliano Buendía said at that time, “just because we invited a gringo to eat some bananas.”

It just felt like an apt comparison to America’s involvement in the War on Drugs, so that’s how that ended up in there.

48. In the same conversation between Javier and Alejandra in chapter 21, he calls cowboys ‘vaqueros’ whereas she refers to them as ‘llaneros’. ‘Vaquero’ is the Mexican word for ‘cowboy’ and ‘llanero’ is the Colombian equivalent.

49. The two cats in chapters 21 and 22, Caturra and Bourbon, are named after types of coffee beans.

50. In the conversation between Horacio and Elena in chapter 22, I couldn’t have written the parts about the jaguar, snake and condor without Infinite Country by Patricia Engel (I’ll talk about this book more again after chapter 23).

Another book by a Colombian author that inspired me for chapters 21/22 was The Man Who Could Move Clouds: A Memoir by Ingrid Rojas Contreras (the same author as The Fruit of the Drunken Tree, which I’ve mentioned above somewhere).

51. In chapter 22, when Horacio says: “But there can be a certain kind of freedom in the dark....” I have to give a nod to Black Sails. It’s a quote I’ve talked about before on my Tumblr after I realised it had unintentional similarities to chapters 1 and 2 of OHDH (I only watched Black Sails for the first time in 2023, so wasn’t aware of Flint’s quote back in 2021). Obviously, Flint isn’t just talking about queerness in his speech to Silver, but I used light/dark metaphors in a similar way at the start of this fic, so this is just another callback to that.

52. The mention of El Dorado (‘The Golden One’) in chapter 22 is in reference to the Spanish conquistadors’ quest for a hidden city of gold when they came to Colombia and other parts of Latin America. The legend centres on Lake Guatavita (located near current-day Bogotá), which was one of the sacred lakes of the Muisca people (of which Bochica is a deity of). They were said to carry out rituals at the lake involving their leader being covered in gold dust and trinkets/jewellery etc. would be thrown into the water as offerings. The Spanish colonisers found the lake and tried to drain it in order to hunt for gold, but nothing substantial has ever been found. The lake is now a protected area and attempts to drain it are illegal.

53. The Simón Bolívar half-man, half-condor statue in Manizales mentioned in chapter 22 exists in real life:

54. Here’s the Colombian coat of arms referenced in chapter 22, which also forms part of the CNP emblem:

55. Bochica has been mentioned previously, but I added reference to Chibchacum here as well, who was the one to cause the flood that Bochica stopped with a strike of his staff by creating the Tequendama Falls (also near current-day Bogotá).

56. Día de Todos los Santos refers to the Catholic tradition of All Saints Day, which as explained in chapter 22 differs from Día de Muertos. I wanted to show the differences between Colombian and Mexican culture here – and by extension, Horacio’s and Javier’s different experiences -  but then also maybe have one kinda influence the other based on Horacio’s time spent in Texas.

57. Calentado is mentioned in chapter 22 and there’s a recipe if you fancy a traditional Colombian breakfast and here’s a recipe for cocadas as well.

58. Eduardo’s term of endearment for Elena is ‘Mi media naranja’, which literally translates from Spanish as ‘My half an orange’ but really means ‘My better half’ or ‘My soulmate’. I went with soulmate in my translation, as it feels more significant/appropriate to me. The reference to a postcard with orange groves on it in Eduardo’s trinket box is also a nod to this nickname, just because lol.

59. In case anyone was wondering, or didn’t pick up on it, the scene towards the end of chapter 22 between Horacio and Javier in the car and looking down on Medellín is the same spot from chapter 5 where they said goodbye before Horacio left for Madrid. It felt like the perfect full circle but everything is obviously different now ❤️

[english8muffin]

Vogue morning routine

Y/N Y/N/L’s guide to effortless natural makeup

Summary: you are asked to do the Vogue Beauty Secrets video and your two boys decide to join the party

Word count: around 2000

Warning: none, just pure floof!

I apologize in advance if there are any spelling and/or grammar mistakes, English is not my first language (+ this is my very first fic)

HEADLINE Henry Cavill’s new girlfriend, designer Y/N Y/L/N reveals her everyday morning routine in recent Vogue video: Y/N Y/L/N shows off her secrets to the perfect fusion of European and Asian beauty.

You stood in the spacious bathroom of the hotel room, only wearing a big, fluffy, white robe, that was actually Henry’s. But since the man was in the gym, you took the opportunity to lend it and bathe yourself in his musky smell, that calmed your nerves. Last night you started panicking, thinking you would probably look stupid for the entire world to see, luckily Henry and Kal tried to calm you down with cuddles and kisses.

This was the first ‘interview’ you would do, being such a young, successful entrepreneur really caught the attention of the media. When you first started your small online shop, you never would have thought you would end up here. Five years later, with a steady income, the job you always wished for and the man you had a crush on since the first time you laid eyes on him. Being a creative, it really made your heart soar with happiness, seeing all your products, your babies, in new homes where they would make others happy.

You were really proud of yourself. Henry was as well, and he made sure you and everybody around you knew. You were apprehensive at first, being with such a well known actor, who was also much older than you, it made you nervous of what people would say, what the media would say. You didn’t want to tarnish Henry’s image. You knew there were people with a much bigger age gap, but still, people were ruthless. So you both decided to take it slow, being careful with going out in public and social media posts.

You stand in front of the large mirror, which had a camera attached to it and open up your makeup bag. Right before you went into the bathroom, you made yourself a nice cup of tea, trying to stay calm. “Hi! I’m Y/N and today I am going to show you my everyday makeup routine,” you say with a smile, “I am not a dermatologist so please don’t take what I say too seriously.”

You grab a small white washcloth and hold it up, so it was in the frame, “First, I am going to wash my face and put on a few drops of serum,” You dampen the cloth and wipe it over your face and neck. You put a few drops in the palm of your hand and pat them into your skin. “Now I going to use my jade roller to massage the serum into my skin. It’s quite funny seeing so many people use these nowadays. In ancient China they were mostly used by the elite to keep there skin ageless. They would call jade the Stone of Heaven. It’s really helpful for the people who wake up with a puffy face like me,” you chuckle.

Somethimes you’d wake up with puffy cheeks, which led to Henry calling you his chubby bunny in the morning.

“Just a quick tip, and this is for everybody, make sure you always use SPF. I personally use SPF 30 and this one is shine control, since I tend to get an oily skin, but you can also use a regular one or a foundation with SPF in it. Believe me when I say your skin will be thankful.”

You grab the small tube of sun cream and show the amount you’ll use. You even convinced Henry to wear SPF everyday. At first he said he didn’t think it would make such a big difference, but when he realised you were going to be the one to put it on him, he was convinced about its benefits and adamant to wear it everyday. After working the thick cream into your skin, you put on some lipbalm and rummage through the pouch in front of you. When you find the product you’re looking for, you hold it up. “Now, I am going to put on a bit of concealer, this one is from Maybelline. After this, I will use a lighter shade under my eyes and on my acne scars that I have here,” you point and circle around the small cluster of scars on the sides of your cheeks.

Before blending out the concealer, you smile at the lens and put in two bright yellow hairclips, to keep your dark locks from falling into your face. “I probably should have done this at the start,” you laugh. The nerves creeping up a little. It wasn’t that you where a shy person, but knowing thousands of people will watch this, did something to you. You were always a very easygoing person, who could talk with pretty much everybody. But knowing people were going to watch you do something so intimate in a way, and would probably comment on it, scared you a little. While you would be 100% yourself, doing something as mundane as getting ready. If they didn’t like you now, then they probably won’t like you later. And that was what made you so afraid.

The bathrobe falls a bit down your shoulder, but you ignore it, since your hair fell down your shoulders in big waves. “Okay, brows. I used to block them in really dark when I was younger, but now I try to keep a light hand. I’ll use this Got 2B Glued as a brow gel afterwards. The tails of my eyebrows tend to move if I don’t use a strong enough gel. If you’re Asian you will understand the struggle.”

You quickly finish your brows, put some bronzer on your face and eyelids and take out your liquid eyeliner. “Am I the only one that acts like I’m a beauty guru whenever I do my makeup? Like, I’m just acting as if I’m used to this, right now, but to be honest, I was really nervous to do this video for Vogue,” you admit, “they will probably regret asking me,” you chuckle. You finish your eyemakeup with curling your long lashes, thanks to your mother’s genes, and add a coat of mascara.

You take in a deep breath, excited to show everyone the product you had been waiting for. “The next thing I am really proud to show you guys, because I designed the packaging. This is the new limited edition blush and highlighter palette from Dior, which they created for Lunar New Year!” You beam with pride, holding up the elegant looking palette. It had a darker toned glossy finish and the borders were the traditional Chinese looking frames, which were 3D and were surrounded by a wild variety of peonies. In the middle of the lid was your Chinese calligraphy in big golden brush stokes that said ‘year of the Ox’, the clasp was designed so it resembled an antique Chinese coin and on the side hung a jade charm.

“You can pre-order this palette now, I think they will put a link-thingy in de description. I wish you all a happy and blessed Lunar New Year, 祝农历年新年快乐牛年大吉!”

Just as you’re about to add some blush to your cheeks, the bathroom door creaks open and a curly-headed, sweaty Henry pops his head in. Fresh from the gym, and were you thankful for his new intense workout, because he was truely a sight to behold. A cheeky smile graces his handsome face when he spots you in front of the mirror, only wearing his robe, which made his grin widen.

“what are you doing in here? Are you hiding from me? Playing hide and seek is it?” he teases and rakes his large hand through the tousled curls, but just as he’s done speaking, he sees the camera behind you, and blushes. “Oh, I didn’t know you were filming, I’m sorry darling,” he smiles and gives a small wave in the direction of the camera. You led out a giggle, cheeks turning red already, if he’d keep this up, you wouldn’t need to add blush. You couldn’t focus anymore, he looked so attractive, only wearing his black gym shorts and a tight dark blue tank top. Damn that camera, otherwise you would have jumped him. Henry, thought the exact same thing. Seeing you, only wearing his robe and your hair still a bit wild from this morning’s cardio, made him hold back a moan. Those two cute, yellow clips in your hair could have fooled him, because you were anything but innocent.

Before he’s about to close the door again, he blows you a kiss. But his actions are stopped when a big bear makes his appearance. Bolting past his dad’s legs, Kal comes into the bathroom. Henry tries to catch him but misses. The black and white akita excitedly sniffs his head around the sink, trying to see what you were up to with all the stuff lying on the marble counter.

“Kal!” Henry whisper-yelled, trying to stay hidden behind the door. But you could still see his massive body crouched down behind the wood. It was rather funny, seeing the large man so panicked about getting his dog to listen. It kind of reminded you of that one video from BBC were a professor was being interviewed and his baby and nanny showed up in the background. While Henry tried to get Kal’s attention, the dog just sat next to your legs, and smiled when you pet him behind his ear. He was your good boy.

You both knew there was no other option but to keep Kal here, once he saw you do your makeup, he wanted to watch and get his ‘makeup’ done as well.

Henry also saw the look in Kal’s eyes and let out a sigh. Might as well stay with his two loves. He stood up from his position and walked to you, wrapping his sweaty but oh so save body around your figure, and placed a prolonged kiss on the exposed skin just by your shoulder. So far for taking it slow… He pressed himself thighter against your back, hiding his face in the crook of your neck and intertwined your hands, slowly rocking you two back en forth. “You look beautiful, my love,” he whispered, so only you could hear it, at least you hoped the camera wouldn’t pick that up. You let out a little giggle, like the inner schoolgirl you were whenever he was around you.

“Kal loves when Y/N does his makeup as well, don’t you boy,” Henry explains with a smile and looks down at the bear by your bare feet. Kal gives a small ruff and sweeps his tail eagerly. “Did you show them what you made,” he asked you with a wide smile, and looked straight in to the camera, “she worked really hard on that design, so I hope you all like it,” he declared proudly.

You ended up doing your makeup routine with your two boys in the background. Henry left for a few minutes to shower in the second bathroom your hotelroom had, and came back clad in a pair of light jogging trousers and a sweater. Even though you were inside, it was still a bit too chilly to walk around in short sleeves, being mid-winter and all. He just sat on the small wooden bench by the door, still in frame for everybody to enjoy and behold. His hair now damp. He was reading in a book and patiently waiting for you to get ready, occasionally looking up and laughing when you would wet your hands or Kal’s special makeup brush in the sink and pretend to do his makeup. The dog would bark excitedly and give you kisses. “Wow Kal, you look so pretty,” Henry told the big floof with the chuckle.

“Okay, this was my -somewhat- everyday makeup routine! Thank you guys for watching this chaotic mess, hope you laughed a bit, bye-bye, 再见!” How do those vlogger end their videos? Smash like and subscribe?

Behind you Henry looked up from the pages of his fantasy book and arched his brow, “Hey! No shout-out for your special guests? See you all next time!”

WOOHOO!! This is my very first fanfic, I really hope you enjoyed it. Liking, reposting and commenting would mean a lot to me! If you do repost this, please do not edit or copy my work. I worked really hard on this.

Much love, Nahmi xxx

Masterlist can be found HERE!

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[dropintomanga]

Shikimori’s Friends Are the Real Cuties

“I’m really glad I’m friends with you guys. You’re all so adorable, so cool...the best friends in the whole world.”

I binged all the English volumes of Shikimori’s Not Just a Cutie from my library and I can’t help but find this cast of high school friends endearing. While the series does have a different spin on shonen rom-coms (i.e. the main couple is already together and the girl is the assertive one), there’s a great amount of emphasis on the friendships outside of the romance.

Shikimori and Izumi (the main characters) being together for a year starts a gradual domino effect where new relationships are made. It’s honestly a bit wholesome. I enjoyed the daily adventures of the main cast of friends. Shu Inuzuka is the goofy brother type, Kyo Nezozaki is the girl who wants everyone around her to have a good time, and Yui Hachimitsu is the shy person with a heart of gold. Though I wonder why I didn’t care about stuff like this in other shonen rom-com series like Komi Can’t Communicate. I think that’s because there doesn’t seem to be much tension in Shikimori’s Not Just a Cutie.

Even when tension among friends happens in the manga/anime, it goes away somewhat fast. This was evident when a new member of the friend group, Kamiya, appears. She had feelings for Izumi in the past, but never said anything. When the school culture festival does a “couple numbers” matching game, Izumi and Kamiya have the same number. Shikimori becomes flustered over who has Izumi’s number and learns Kamiya has it. Kamiya gives her number to Shikimori, but Shikimori returns it as she realizes that Kamiya has feelings for Izumi.  Kamiya proclaims she doesn’t really care about romance despite her body reacting otherwise. Shikimori says it’s okay to hold onto those feelings even though it can mean potential rivalry. The two would become close friends as the series progresses.

I do think conflict is necessary, but it doesn’t have to be super dramatic, Abd sometimes, the resolutions shouldn’t always be what you expect. I also think about love triangle tropes - re: female friends becoming romantic rivals. I do understand that institutional pressure can be overwhelming, but I don’t think women automatically turn ruthless on each other when a man they both love comes into the picture.

The Shikomori/Kamiya friendship resolution does sound like “What? Is that realistic?” in a few parts, but it showcases how compassionate Shikimori is. She’s the mature, cool girl who knows what to say. Plus, it’s really freaking hard to talk about romantic feelings when they are not being said or reciprocated. There’s no good guide book for this. I personally liked how it ended and am not the only one who feels that way. Kamiya gets featured again as she reveals to Nekozaki that she regretted declining Nekozaki’s attempts to get her to hang out because she took kindness for granted. Nekozaki can be categorized as a “try hard” re: wanting to be friends with many people, but she’s someone who wants to form honest relationships with her peers. As adults, we lose that kind of attentiveness and/or don’t wish to develop it due to life’s commitments when it doesn’t have to be that way.

I also love the relay race story that happens after (Volumes 5-6) because of its spotlight on Hachimitsu. She’s a couch potato type with a expressionless face. While she dreads participating in athletic events, her friends tell her to try and that they’ll win if they work together. Hachimitsu becomes tired and flustered from relay race training over time, but seeing how her friends trust her and one another gets her to change her tune (and also her expressions). It’s really wholesome because people who lack confidence can’t just magically find it on their own and it takes interdependent forces (i.e. great friends) to slowly build confidence.

I think the wholesomeness part of Shikimori’s Not Just a Cutie has gotten to be me because while I am “anti-positive psychology,” the message isn’t coming from someone who thinks that everything can be solved with good vibes and “self-care.” Wholesomeness feels more spiritual and represents true balance. Right now, our lives are not wholesome and not many people believe in one another. I guess I’m somewhat like Izumi (who has HORRIBLE luck) where he persists in being there for people. Well, trying my best to be because I’ve been down on my luck many times like he has.

I feel that this series is about people being able to be their best selves because of other people who aren’t just cuties - they’re the unsung heroes of our lives who are both adorable and cool.

[ktffansub]

Bijutsu Techo: Boys Love – Interview: Yoneda Kou

This article was first published in November 17th, 2014. Translated from Japanesse to Bahasa Indonesia by kalengjelek and then translated from Bahasa Indonesia to English by KTFfansub. Source: here

When did you first encounter manga?

I was born in a family with three daughters; while my older sister likes reading Ribbon magazine, I like reading Nakayoshi. It was the era of Asagiri Yuu-sensei, when I was in elementary school. My favorite at that time were Kusunoki Kei sensei’s works and Patlabor. When it came to Shonen, I would say I was more into Shounen Sunday. I also loved Kawaraha Izumi sensei’s works. When I think about it, rather than manga that were full of passion, I’d actually prefer manga that had calm and soothing kind of vibe.

Is that so… What about BL?

When I was in Junior High, my older sister showed me Captain Tsubasa Doujinshi by Ozaki Minami and I was dumbfounded, I thought, “So, there’s also a world like this!”. After that, I started to buy BL manga. At that time, the mangaka who left the most impression to me was Nishi Keikosensei. Her works such as Mizu Ga Koori Ni Naru Toki, Tenshi Ni Naranakya have unique openings, it made me reread them many times. Uida Shiuko (now Kano Shiuko) and Yoshinaga Fumi Sensei are also my favorite mangaka.

When was the first time you draw manga?

I seriously began drawing manga in my first year of junior high. At first, I drew a pair of man and woman, but after page three, I felt something was off. So, I tried drawing BL for the next one. Just like the present, I’ve always loved less expressive and less-talkactive main characters (laughs). But the more I draw, then an attentive senpai with good personality and short haired ones like Togawa in Doushitemo Furetakunai also appeared. At that moment I thought, “Oh, this is it!”

You really weren’t embarrassed, are you? (laughs)

Well, it’s because it was embarrassing, that’s why I’m not really open about my drawing manga activity.

(laughs) But you debut as professional mangaka eventually, how did that happen?

Yes, after that… I worked as office lady. I got married not long after, but then, I was getting through a marriage blues. At that time, I was invested in Kakashi and Naruto shown by my older sister along with Comiket catalogue.

The power of moe beats out your anxiety (laughs)

It’s true (laughs). Escaping from reality, I checked a lot of circles and opened some sites. There I found a work from a novelist (now has debuted professionally) that I really liked. This is why I started writing novel at first, not drawing. I have a lot of ways to accommodate my moe needs. I also once drew Doujinshi but due to my inability to use a proper diction, the result wasn’t optimal (laughs). After drawing slowly and more at ease, I got into Katekyo Hitman Reborn fandom and drew a lot of doujinshi for that series. A year later, I was contacted by Taiyou Tosho publisher.

“With that publisher, Yoneda Kou published Doushitemo Furetakunai which has been adapted into a movie. Since the beginning, Yoneda Kou didn’t draw one-shot but serialization. For the movie, even though it only tells a story of daily lives, but the directing, composition and dialogue are impressive. About 4,5 years later, the second volume of Saezuru Tori wa Habatakanai that had the yakuza neighborhood setting was released. This has completely different feeling compared to Doushitemo Furetakunai.”

My first work was actually published in Drap, so I had it adjusted to be a less-heavy work. That’s why I ended up switching to another magazine.

Was it a demand from the editor?

Of course I only draw what I want to draw. But without realizing, I always draw them to fit the magazine. And it seems like Taiyou Tosho prefers me to draw more simple work.

So, sensei is the type who pays attention to editor’s suggestion. When you wrote the first chapter of Saezuru Tori Wa Habatakanai, did you already want Yashiro to be the main character (for longterm series)?

Right. I didn’t explain it in the first one-shot, but I always believe that no matter how you look at it, Yashiro really loved Kageyama. And (even though he’s drawn like that) he is actually a neko (uke). I think he is an interesting character. When I drew highschooler Yashiro and others, it had been decided that I wanted to write a serialization for this.

And only then the character Doumeki was born?

At that time, the character Doumeki didn’t exist, but I thought very hard about what kind of partner that would be suitable for Yashiro. I took a break from drawing for about two years. I only worked on illustration during that time, until one morning an idea suddenly came to me, “That’s right! Erectile dysfunction!”. I immediately sent an email to my editor: “A perverted impotent man!” (laughs). Afterwards, I finally worked on the first draft.

(laughs hard) Finally, the combination of Yashiro and Doumeki who are the opposite of each other was decided. What an amazing couple that can even make the readers losing sleep.

I do have this particular interest in people’s decision and behaviour resulted from a contrasting relationship that is full of conflicts. Because there are so many characters in Saezuru, I have this excel file compiling the plot for each character chronologically. Otherwise, I would’ve forgotten about it. If I didn’t seriously research (the setting of my own story), I wouldn’t be able to write anything when I made name. But even though I got through it, drawing a family with no blood ties like yakuza was still difficult. If I don’t focus, the story might turn out like Nagara Sakugyou*. That’s why now I’m just focusing on doing Saezuru.

*) nagara sakugyou: other work that being serialized at the same time

Up until now, Sensei has published 5 volumes and all of them have beautiful covers with varied tones.

Actually, the cover color for Doushitemo Furetakunai should’ve looked like red wine, but it seemed like there was an error in printing so the pink was contrasting into it. But it turned out to be good.

Then about the cover for the Saezuru first volume. It’s so impressive! The stepped-on man! All the people around me also had high appraise for this.

Actually, there were so many things happened in the process. By taking the request (it isn’t clearly explained whether it’s from editor/designer) of “Yashiro sitting alone”, I first submitted that illustration to the book designer. However, I couldn’t throw away the idea of Yashiro being stepped on, so, during the next three days I was stressed out. I’ve finally asked them to keep my idea and that’s how the cover of the first volume ended up the way it is now.

I see! For the second volume, it’s totally different, isn’t it? It’s a scenery, but when you do a double take, there are Yashiro and Doumeki!

I always want to give a different vibe in each volume. Actually I’m also a fan of the way Tsumugi Taku-sensei draws scenery.

Hoo-, sensei is a fan of Tsumugi sensei! Talking abough NIGHTS, when you open the cover, there’s a surprise in it!

Yes, if you look at the rough sketches there were 4 pages of picture that were interconnected. In the end, the desainer took picture number two as the cover and number four to put it on the bottom of the back cover. For Soredemo, I didn’t get any guide from the book designer. I combined the the feel of the story with a touch of water paint. At first, I actually wanted to make Deguchi pulling Onoda’s hand to get out of the train, but it ended up looking like Deguchi forced Onoda to stay (with him). So I decided it’s Onoda who’s getting off the train by himself with Deguchi waiting on the platform.

Do you do the coloring with computer? How about the non-colored script?

I use SAI for coloring but for monochrome I usually draw by my hand until the inking, then I do the tone using photoshop.

Do you self-learned drawing?

Well, I at least bought a lot of ‘pose reference’ books often. When it comes to buy things, it feels great, doesn’t it? But when it comes to manga, we draw to tell our moe concept.. well, I love drawing moe concept, but the thing is- I’m not really good at drawing. I like thinking about moe stuff, I also like to combine colors (inside my head) but when I do, I have no desire to draw I, even though that’s the important part. There are often times when I feel like drawing is a handful. In short, I want to draw something that isn’t too troublesome.

But, isnt it because you’re doing manga seriously that it feels difficult?

Because I’m too serious I feel like the story can be boring. Not only the work but also the author (laughs). I often read comments saying my manga is ‘down to earth’. I guess it’s shown obviously in every each of my works

Sure, there are people who think like, “In real world, there’s no way a wakagashira can be as masochist as Yashiro”, but apart from that, Saezuru still gives an impression of it being realistic. In drawing the important men’s arms and muscles in your work, sensei has done your best. Getting into the story, the characters also put extra effort to look elegant. Despite the young age, in a positive sense, sensei’s works feels like having Showa* vibe.

(*SHOWA ERA: 1926~1989)

I’m no longer young, though (laughs). Maybe this is why my works often get called “JUNE”. Especially Saezuru, I think it really fits (JUNE concept).

Are you an organized person?

I’m actually a person who have no chill (laughs). But I have this side of myself who tend to see things as a whole, look at my surrounding then step on the brake. There is also a side of me that is so energetic in creating my own moe that I turn into a selfish person. I guess that’s also my flaw.

It seems like sensei is the type who has her own editorial meeting inside her head (laughs)

I wish it’s not true, but unfortunately, I’m the type of person who is embarrased to admit that I have a relationship with manga. Even until now I have yet told my close friends about this job (as BL mangaka). I’m not that kind of person who like to share or tell others about my moe situation inside my head. When my moe concept is being visualized in public I would scream, “Don’t look! But if you want to read it, I’d be happy”. Yes, I’m that kind of person.

I wonder if sensei’s works are the manifestation of sensei’s own self-contradictions..