#or they flow to ideas that i shouldn't be focusing on at the moment

[otome-corner-cafe]

Happy birthday to the director extraordinaire, Llyod Newton!

[many-shades-of-violence]

dear doctor

✢ content: NSFW, Medical Kink, Doctor-Patient Roleplay, Dom-Sub Dynamics, Glove Kink, improper use of Devil Fruit, Electrostimulation

✢ pairing: Trafalgar D. Law x f! Reader

✢ characters: Law, Bepo, Shachi, Penguin, Ikkaku, Uni

✢ word count: 7.500

Life on the Polar Tang was delightful to say the least.

With a wonderful crew, a comfortable bed, delicious food, your very own Polar Bear on board, and last but not least, the company of your lover and partner, Trafalgar D. Law, you shouldn't have had much reason to complain. Well, perhaps, except for the fact that you were being pursued by the World Government due to your listed bounty. But apart from that, life was pretty good, especially when compared to the time before you joined the Heart Pirates. And slowly, but surely, you had even found yourself falling in love with none other than your own captain.

At the start of your relationship, Law had warned you that he was preoccupied with his duties, studies, and crew. He made it clear that these responsibilities were just as important as you, and that he would strive to care for them equally. Of course, you understood what you were getting into with a warning like that. Law's focused and determined demeanor was one of the many things that had captivated you, after all. And despite his initial warning, whenever he had to cancel your plans for sudden matters at hand, he always made it up to you in some way.

However, despite all of this, you currently found yourself pondering the state of your relationship. Law was avoiding your touch as if it were made of seastone, and this had been going on for a rough week. It wasn't unusual for you two to go without intimacy over some periods of time, but Law wouldn't even share a proper kiss or allow himself to be held while sleeping, and you knew how important latter was to him, considering the numerous nightmares he had to endure.

At first, you had tried to suppress your hurt over his distant demeanor. However, after enduring a dragging week, you finally reached your breaking point in front of Ikkaku. The poor girl had jokingly inquired about life in paradise, likely intending to check up on you, as you had formed a tight bond with the female crew member, but before you knew it, tears had welled up at the corners of your eyes, streaming down your cheeks within seconds.

Fortunately, Ikkaku responded with genuine sisterly concern, guiding you to a quieter section of the sub-marine where you could be alone. With a gentle hand stroking your back, she hushed you softly as you poured out your frustration from the past few days through tears.

"Shh, it's okay, y/n," Ikkaku whispered, offering you a heartfelt smile in an attempt to console you.

Tears still welling in your eyes, you looked up at her and spoke with a trembling voice, "I just don't know anymore, ´Kaku. He doesn't even talk to me. It's not like we even fought or anything."

Ikkaku raised an eyebrow at your words and let out a sigh of defeat. "Ugh, as much as I respect him, Captain can be so cryptic sometimes," she admitted, rubbing her neck uncomfortably. She then continued, "You sure there's no way you unintentionally upset him?"

Shaking your head, you looked down at the ground, attempting to control the flow of your emotions. Ikkaku seemed to understand your struggle and promptly produced a handkerchief, offering it to you. "Here, you poor thing. Take this."

"Thanks," you mumbled, using the handkerchief to dry your tears and blow your nose, working to steady your breathing. Meanwhile, Ikkaku appeared to be considering various possibilities for your captain's odd behavior. "Maybe we should approach this from a different angle. When did all of this start? Any idea? Take your time if you need."

You nodded in agreement with Ikkaku's suggestion, taking a moment to reflect on the past days and the onset of Law's sudden change in behavior. As you thought back, you shuddered as memories surfaced—countless instances when you had attempted to connect with your raven-haired lover. Each time, he had either brushed you off with something else on his busy mind or directly stated that he wasn't interested in your advances. The sting of hot tears threatened your eyes once more, your lower lip quivering in the face of this defeat, when suddenly, a vivid scene flashed through your mind.

You were immersed in a book as the door to your shared room swung open, announcing the return of none other than your boyfriend. Your gaze lifted from the page you were reading, attempting to remember where you had left off. A smile crept onto your face as you beheld Law's appearance – his dark, tousled hair still damp and droplets of water adorning his skin. He was dressed only in his blue jeans with black spots, the fabric fitting snugly low on his hips. A white cotton towel draped lazily over his right shoulder, partially concealing a fraction of the numerous black tattoos that adorned his tanned, well-defined torso.

A sensation of arousal began to stir within you as he entered the room. The weighty iron door closed behind Law automatically as he ran his fingers through his short hair, his inked fingers deftly arranging the strands. His sharp, yellow eyes met yours, a knowing smirk gracing his weary features. "Like what you see?" he purred, his voice deep and textured.

With an eager nod, you agreed, though you couldn't help but feel a touch embarrassed at being caught gazing at him so intently. "Don´t have to ask twice," you responded. Law casually tossed the towel aside, then crawled onto the bed you both shared. He briefly glanced at the book in your hands before placing it face down, ensuring you could resume reading it later. He sealed this act with a kiss on your temple, his skilled hands tracing the contours of your body.

"Wanna get a feel?" Law's voice rumbled, planting another kiss near your neck and sending a shiver down your spine as he exhaled warm air against your skin. You couldn't help but emit a soft, pleased sound at the feeling of his goatee brushing against you, relishing the delicate scratchiness it provided. Gradually, you shifted your position, now sandwiched between Law's body and the bed. Your gaze met his as you lightly traced one of the many inked lines on his chest. Your voice adopted a sultry tone as you parted your lips, ready to playfully tease your lover. "Right at your disposal, doctor."

For a brief moment, Law didn't react at all. His gaze seemed fixed on what you could only assume was nothingness. Then, with a sudden movement, he excused himself, pressing his hand to his forehead and muttering about being much more tired from the surgery than he had anticipated. He sought refuge under the thick blanket of the bed. While his reaction was a bit surprising, you didn't dwell on it too much. Sudden waves of exhaustion were nothing out of the ordinary when it came to your hardworking boyfriend.

However, as you replayed the scene in your mind, dissecting it frame by frame, a realization struck you like a bolt of lightning. This had to be the exact moment when Law's odd behavior had begun, starting with his turning away from you in a manner that made it impossible for you to snuggle up to him, as was your usual sleeping arrangement.

A surge of understanding flooded over you, and you swiftly turned your head towards Ikkaku, who was now vigorously gesturing in your direction. Yet, her frantic movements weren't directed at you. You turned your head, recognizing a familiar figure – a slender man wearing a Penguin hat.

"Get lost, Penguin!" Ikkaku exclaimed to him, her tone assertive. The young man scratched his cheek sheepishly, clearly caught off guard. "S-Sorry, I heard some sobs, so we—"

Ikkaku cut him off abruptly, her tone curt, "Don't you worry your pretty little head about this. y/n's dealing with some grown-up issues, and it looks like we need some grown-up solutions." She gestured for him to leave immediately, but her eyes widened as if another thought struck her. "Wait, did you say 'we'?"

Penguin nodded, his embarrassment evident. Just then, another familiar face appeared around the corner – none other than the other half of the renowned Heart Pirate duo, Shachi. He greeted you casually, "Sup!" It seemed as if Ikkaku was on the verge of giving up on the whole situation. She brought a hand to her forehead and let out a loud sigh, muttering to herself, "May the gods save me from whatever idiocy is going to come out of this."

In that moment, Penguin knelt in front of you, gently taking the handkerchief from your hand and using it to dab away the traces of tears and mucus you had missed. "There, there, y/n. No need to cry. It's just good old Shachi and Penguin."

Meanwhile, Shachi shot Ikkaku a disapproving look, planting his hands on his hips and gesturing first towards her and then towards you. "A bit of respect for your seniors wouldn't hurt, you know. Anyway, what's going on with them?"

"We're practically the same age, Shachi. And need I remind you of the captain's words? We're all equals, including Bepo," Ikkaku retorted, rolling her eyes and crossing her arms. However, she quickly realized that bringing up the problem at hand might not have been the best choice, as a surprised squeal from Penguin shifted her attention back to you, still teary-eyed.

"Hey, everything's okay, y/n. Whatever's on your mind, we'll find a way to sort it out," Penguin assured you, doing his best to soothe your distress by gently patting away the lingering traces of moisture around your eyes. As you and Penguin tried to calm yourselves, embarrassed by the presence of not only Ikkaku but also two of your boyfriend's closest childhood friends, Penguin unexpectedly placed his hat on your head. The warm fabric cocooned your head snugly.

Eventually, your tears subsided, leaving only occasional silent hiccups in their wake. During this time, Ikkaku reluctantly filled Penguin and Shachi in on your situation, offering them insight into your current state, even if she seemed a bit unwilling to share at first.

Shachi let out a defeated sigh and scratched the back of his head, looking down at you over his tinted glasses. "So, any clue why he's been acting so distant? Captain must have one damn good reason to be giving you the cold shoulder like that, because to put if quite frankly, he got a lot of free time right now." His scarlet red eyes met yours, and you offered a weak nod, sensing his keen interest. "I'm not entirely certain, but I think it all started last week when he returned from his shower...." you mumbled, avoiding his gaze and blushing slightly.

"Oh my god, spare us the details if it happened during your intimate moments. I can live without that kind of insight into Captain," Ikkaku protested, shaking her head vigorously and crossing her arms defensively.

Shachi chuckled at Ikkaku's reaction, revealing his sharp teeth as he retorted, "You know how the saying goes, Ikkaku, the devil's in the details."

You felt a twinge of embarrassment, wishing you hadn't let your guard down so much around the crew. The thought of Law finding out that you had discussed your relationship issues with them made you cringe. But considering your lack of options, you knew you had to proceed.

Penguin's gentle voice brought you back to reality, his blue eyes locking onto yours. "Pay no mind to those two scatterbrains. You don't have to tell us if you're uncomfortable, but if you accidentally stepped on his toes somehow, we might be able to help you sort it out if you open up about it. Shachi and I have plenty of experience with that, believe me." He offered you an encouraging pat on the shoulder, while Shachi and Ikkaku now turned to face Penguin together, hissing in protest, "We're not scatterbrains!"

With a sigh, you gathered your thoughts and began explaining the situation that you believed marked the beginning of this strained dynamic. Just as you finished describing how Law had suddenly turned away, Penguin and Shachi exchanged a knowing glance before focusing back on you. Shachi grinned and chuckled. "Hey, y/n, you don't have to answer, but did you happen to do anything unusual?" You replied in a hoarse voice, "What do you mean?"

Penguin continued Shachi's line of thought. "Like, you know, anything new. Like a pet-name or something?" Both of them watched you intently, and you gave a wide-eyed look, feeling embarrassed as you nodded slightly. Ikkaku let out a dying sound, almost covering her ears with her hands. "Oh my god, do I really want to hear this?"

Shachi's snickering continued as he flashed his teeth, his hands stuffed into his pockets. "No need to explain. If my hunch is right, poor y/n stumbled into the biggest blunder imaginable." Just as Shachi finished his statement, Penguin's neck snapped in your direction, his eyes widening as realization dawned on him. He couldn't help but blurt out the revelation to Ikkaku anyway, his voice too loud for comfort. "Did you call him 'doctor'?!" You winced at the volume of his words, wishing you could disappear into thin air at that moment. Slowly, you nodded, your cheeks burning with embarrassment.

Ikkaku seemed torn between wanting to join you in your vanishing act and wanting to console you. She spoke up, trying to offer reassurance. "Well, it's not a big deal, right? I mean, it's literally his profession, so it's not like it's something out of the ordinary."

Shachi rolled his eyes at her words. "That's precisely the issue." Ikkaku looked at him, confusion etched on her face. "What do you mean?"

Letting out another sigh, Shachi brought his hand to his forehead and began to explain while gesturing. "Captain might be a pirate, but he still holds onto his professional ethics as a doctor. Not that I think he´s not into this. We all know he´s a perv. But knowing him, he probably struggled with the moral aspect anyhow." Penguin nodded in shared agreement, then laid a comforting hand on your shoulder. "I´m fully with you at your endeavor though. Nothing out of the window on a ship full of medical professionals."

Shachi, looking somewhat shocked, threw his hands up theatrically his mouth wide open. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Taking in all the information, you let out a sigh, a wave of sadness washing over you. You were aware that Law had strong emotional barriers, but if Shachi and Penguin were right, you hadn't realized that he couldn't even communicate his preferences to you openly, even when it was related to his ethical standards. You shivered slightly but composed yourself, gaining the attention of those around you.

"So, what's the plan?" Ikkaku raised an eyebrow, curious about your next steps. For a brief moment, you looked down, clenching your fists before responding. "I suppose I need to talk to Law. I already feel bad for burdening you guys with all of this."

As you looked back up at them, you were met with surprised expressions on Ikkaku's, Shachi's, and Penguin's faces. Color drained from their features, and they all seemed to be staring right behind you. Confused, you turned to see what had captured their attention, and a cold chill ran down your spine as you heard no other than Law's sulky voice.

"Do you now?" His voice rang out, catching you off guard. Ikkaku cried out in surprise, beads of sweat forming on her forehead. Shachi quickly joined in with a question, "Captain, what brings you here?!"

You didn´t have to turn around to know that Law was frowning at them. “I could ask you the same to all of you. One moment I´m in my study, the next moment I get informed from Uni that four members of the crew are from their posts without notice.”

You swallowed hard, realizing the predicament you had unintentionally dragged the others into. Not wanting to implicate them further, you turned toward your captain, locking eyes with his stern gaze as you prepared to respond. However, when your gazes met, you found yourself unable to form any words. Each syllable seemed to stick in your dry throat, likely from the aftermath of your recent crying spell.

It didn't take much for Law to piece together the situation. The tear stains on your face, the handkerchief in Penguin's hand, the concerned expressions on Ikkaku and Shachi's faces, and most telling of all, Penguin's hat still resting on your head like a dorn in his eye – it all added up to a clear picture. With a deep sigh and a quick rub of his temple, Law motioned behind him. "Shachi, Penguin, Ikkaku. Get back on your positions. Now."

As you felt your crewmates start to scramble behind you, you sensed Law's strong hand on your head, gently yet determinedly removing Penguin's hat from your head and returning it to its owner without a second glance. Just as the other three began to move away, Ikkaku sent you a worried look, Shachi and Penguin giving you reassuring thumbs-up gestures from a distance.

Once they had left, Law stood still for a moment, his full attention on you. You silently reached out to him with your gaze, a question forming in your eyes. "What about me?"

He gave you a brisk look before he turned around. "Don't worry, I haven't forgotten you. You wanted to talk, right y/n-ya? Then follow me." With a gulp, you gathered your resolve, trailing after Law through the dimly lit corridors of the Polar Tang. The tension hung heavily in the air as you walked, uncertain about what was to follow.

The two of you came to a standstill only a few minutes later. Lost in your thoughts about the impending conversation, your mind already racing with imagined scenarios, you suddenly realized that Law hadn't led you to your shared living quarters but instead to the submarines' operation room. Irritation welled up within you, and you shot him a pointed look as he pushed open the sturdy iron door and held it open for you.

"What? You need a personal invitation?" he remarked with a smug smile, raising one of his dark eyebrows. His behavior only fueled your frustration, aggravating how he could act as though the past week hadn't even occurred.

With a hint of sarcasm, you retorted, "Nah, I just didn't think I had a doctor's appointment today," before slipping past him and entering the dimly lit operating room, the frown on Laws faces evident. You were well aware that your snappy response wouldn't do any favors for the situation, especially if Shachi´s guess was right, but the way he was nonchalantly messing with you despite the recent tension ignited a raging fire within you.

As your eyes gradually adjusted to the dim lighting, you mustered the room you stood in. The space was bathed in a subdued, bluish light that emanates from overhead fixtures, casting an almost ethereal glow over the space. The walls are paneled in dark metal, giving the room an industrial feel, while shelves and cabinets are neatly arranged along one side, storing medical supplies, instruments, and equipment.

In the center of the room stood a sturdy, adjustable operating table with clean, white sheets draped over it. Overhead, a collection of lamps that could be adjusted to provide focused illumination on the table, created a well-lit and sterile environment for medical procedures. A sleek console nearby housed monitors and displays that provided vital information during the many surgeries your crew performed, one of them being the anesthetic machine you knew Penguin operated most of the times.

Near the table, there was a sink with multiple faucets and a variety of soap and disinfectant dispensers, underscoring the emphasis on maintaining a sterile environment. Cabinets around the sink stored gloves, masks, and other protective gear. A small workstation with a computer and medical records was positioned against the opposite wall, enabling the crew to access crucial information during procedures.

The room wasn´t overly spacious but was carefully organized to ensure efficient movement.

Just when you had finished your quick inspection, you heard the hefty iron door shut behind you, sealing you both inside. Standing close to the operating table, you turned towards Law, finally taking his form in for the first time this today.

His tall figure was framed by the subdued bluish light, casting angular shadows that only accentuate his sharp features. His raven-black hair fell messily over his forehead, the strands catching the faint glow from the overhead fixtures. On a closer look, his eyes seemed even more tired than usual. He's dressed in familiar attire, a black shirt with the Heart Pirates Logo embroidered on it, as well as his signature spotted jeans and hat.

Law's attention focused on you, his eyebrows furrowed slightly as he watches your reactions and body language. His intense gaze held a mixture of concern, and perhaps a hint of regret. Despite the apparent nonchalance he displayed earlier, you could now see the underlying vulnerability that he couldn't quite manage to conceal now all alone with you, the lines on his forehead and the subtle tension in his jaw especially prominent.

You cross your arms in front of you, creating a protective barrier against the eerie atmosphere that seems to hang in the air. The dim lighting accentuates the tension between you and Law, amplifying the weight of the conversation that's about to unfold. Taking a deep breath, you finally break the silence, your voice steady despite the unease you feel.

"So, care to explain why we gotta talk here of all places?" you inquire, your tone a mix of curiosity and skepticism. Your gaze locks onto Law's, searching for any hints in his expression that might reveal his intentions. His usually unreadable eyes hold a mixture of emotions, and you can't help but wonder what he's truly thinking.

Law's response is measured, his voice carrying a touch of that characteristic calm that has both comforted and confounded you in the past. "It's neutral ground. This is our best chance from distractions and prying eyes. I don´t want even more of the crew to get involved in this.” he gives you a stern look, hinting at the situation he just dissolved.

You look guilty to the ground, nodding in understanding about his reasoning even if you weren´t entirely convinced since the roof deck would also have done the job. It felt more so that the operation room's sterile environment and its connection to Law's profession as a doctor seemed to be the room where he felt emotionally most stable for a conversation like this.

"Look, I'm sorry about that, but we could've talked about a potential break-up in our room or somewhere less... formal," you whisper, your voice carrying a touch of vulnerability as your gaze slowly returns to Law's. Tearful frustration lingers in your eyes, a reflection of the emotional turmoil that has been churning within you over the past week.

At the mention of the word "break-up," Law's eyes widened in genuine surprise. His usually composed expression briefly faltered, replaced by a mixture of shock and regret that's almost palpable. His golden eyes held yours, as he spoke quickly, a touch of urgency in his voice. "Are you crazy? I'm not planning to break up with you."

You hold his gaze, unsure how to react properly to his intense response. Your emotions swirl within you, a mixture of relief, confusion, and lingering frustration. Overwhelmed by it all, you decide to follow the crew's motto and follow your heart's lead.

"Then why avoid me like the plague? You could've just said you're not into the whole doctor-roleplay thing due to your ethics" you huff, your words tinged with a mixture of irritation and longing.

As you unfold your arms, it's a silent acknowledgment that you're willing to engage in this conversation, even if it means doing so in a place that feels slightly uncomfortable. The operation room's equipment continues its low hum, a steady backdrop to the charged atmosphere that envelops you both.

Law seems to wrestle with his words for a moment, his gaze flickering away from you briefly before returning, his expression a mix of resignation and determination.

He takes a step closer, bridging the emotional gap between you as a sigh escapes him, tinged with an air of resignation. "I'd be lying greatly if I said I'm not into this, y/n-ya, and that's precisely the problem," he confesses. You gaze at him, your eyes widening slightly at his unexpected admission.

"Hell, I'd willingly comply with any desire you express in that regard," he continues, his tone carrying a mix of sincerity and frustration. "Whether it's indulging in role play or dissecting you all over this damn place. But my concern lies in the consequences. If my professionalism wavers, then what? I've already been labeled a freak by the world, and I couldn't care less about that but what about my crew? And most importantly, what about you?" His voice softens, as if he's revealing a truth that has been weighing heavily on him.

Law words linger in the air, the gravity of his dilemma palpable. The ambient sounds of the room seem to fade as you both stand there, engrossed in this intimate conversation.

"When you were on our bed, looking so alluring and ready for me," he continues, his voice almost a whisper now, "I found myself grappling with that very question. And truth be told, I still haven't found a satisfactory answer."

His eyes bore into yours, as if he's trying to convey his sincerity through his gaze alone.

You listened, your heart pounding as he lays bare a part of his emotions that he rarely exposes. It's both comforting and utterly terrorizing to witness Law like this. However, in reality you wanted to lay this part of him even barer to your eyes. Collecting your answer to follow your agenda, you replied to him, a slight smile on your lips.

"But thats kinda the charm, right? After all, who could juggle this risk better than the genius Surgeon of Death?" you ask, your voice softer as well, as you take one of his hands into yours, grazing slowly over his finger tattoos reading “DEATH”.

Law takes a moment, his gaze briefly drifting to the floor before meeting yours again. His cheeks are slightly tinged, a reaction to the praise you've just offered. "Well, duh, this would be horrible without my ROOM. Even I'm not that sick," he quips, a hint of his usual playful sarcasm in his voice. His tone turns more serious as he continues, "You gotta understand, this is all about endurance and trust, y/n-ya. If you don't like-."

You shush him with a simple gesture, bringing Law's fingers to your lips and placing a gentle kiss on his knuckles. "I trust you, Law. With my life. Please know that I would never say this lightly." you reassure him, your voice carrying the sincerity of your emotions. Your gaze meets his, and for a brief moment, the intensity of your connection is palpable.

Law's eyes reflect a mixture of emotions, a pained expression surfacing as he realizes the depth of the trust you're offering him, despite the turmoil he had inadvertently caused in the past week. "God, how did I deserve you," he murmurs, a genuine sense of wonder in his voice. In a sudden surge of emotion, he closes the remaining distance between you, his pink lips capturing yours in a fervent kiss.

You respond eagerly, the heated kiss igniting a passionate dance between your mouths. Your tongue pricks gently at his lips, coaxing his own to meet yours in an intimate tango. Law's response is immediate, his lips parting to allow your tongues to intertwine in a dance of shared desire. The room's atmosphere seems to intensify, as if the charged energy between you is affecting the very air you breathe.

The kiss deepens, a reflection of the emotions that have been building between you over the past week. In this moment, the operation room's clinical surroundings fade into the background, leaving only the two of you and the unspoken promises that hang between your heated touches and the mingling of your breaths. Only after your break off the kiss to catch some air, do you realize, that Law has elevated you onto the steel table behind you, the cold sensation making your spine chill.

"Are you okay with continuing here?" Law murmurs against your skin, gently nipping at your neck. It's clear that he's very enamored with the smell and feel of being so close to you again. "Sure. Just surprise me, doctor," you giggle, running your fingers through his thin hair. Law glances up at you, his face blushing slightly before he straightens up and scratches the back of his neck. "God damn, it's going to take some getting used to hearing that from you in a setting like this."

You grin at him, giving him a playful wink. "I'm not complaining. You look adorable when you're embarrassed."

"I'll show you adorable," he grumbles to himself, turning towards the table and the station nearby. You watch with interest, trying to see what Law is taking from the wardrobe. His broad frame intentionally blocks your view, making it impossible to see what he's doing. After a few moments of trying to distract yourself by kicking your feet back and forth in the air, you hear a loud snap of rubber coming from where Law was standing.

Your head snaps to him, realizing that he's covered his hands with a pair of medical gloves. He slowly makes his way back to your side, sitting on a rolling steel chair in front of you, a smirk on his lips. "Let's start all of this light, alright? So tell me, why are you here today?"

You already wanted to answer his first question when you realized that Law had already slipped into a role. For a brief moment, you were amazed at how effortless it seemed for him to play his part, but on the other hand, it shouldn't surprise you, considering his expertise. "Well-um..." you struggled to think of a reason, feeling that simply pointing at your cunt would be too quick as a starting point.

Luckily, Law quickly caught on, raising an eyebrow in amusement at your loss for words. "Any recent health problems? Need a check-up?" you contemplated your options before Law started to grin mischievously. "Too horny to think?" "Law!" you exclaimed, pouting.

"Sorry, what was that? I don't know any Law," he countered, crossing his arms in front of his chest playfully and smirking. "Sorry, Doctor," you chuckled. "Doctor-?" he asked once more, clearly wanting to hear something more specific. You sighed, already questioning whether this was a good idea, because it seemed that Law was way deeper into this than you had guessed. "Doctor Trafalgar," you sighed before continuing.

"Say, do you tease all your patients like this? Because if so, I have questions," you remarked, exaggerating a playful sense of exasperation in your tone. You couldn't help but smile as you spoke, the earlier tension of the conversation fading into a more lighthearted atmosphere.

Law responded with a nonchalant shrug and a widening grin. "Only the ones that catch my interest," he replied, his voice carrying a teasing undertone. The corner of his mouth quirked up as he gazed at you, his golden eyes filled with mischief.

You chuckled softly, shaking your head in mock disbelief. "So, I'm just another interesting case for you, huh?" you retorted, playing along with the banter.

His fingers idly tapped against a nearby counter as he maintained eye contact, his playful demeanor undeterred. "Oh, you're much more than just a case, y/n-ya," he said, his voice lowering slightly. "You've managed to intrigue no other but the Surgeon of Death himself."

You raised an eyebrow in mock suspicion, a smile tugging at your lips. "And what exactly has intrigued the Surgeon of Death so much?"

Law leaned in closer, his gaze never wavering from yours. "Why don't we find that out together? For starters, you could get rid of all that fabric. Makes it terribly hard for me to conduct a proper screening of my dearest patient."

Oh.

You gulped, amazed at how well Law was maintaining his character. Encouraged by this, you tried to take it a step further. "Well, I guess you're gonna have to help me with that, Doc. You see, I've got this terrible headache."

Law grins cheekily at that, his hands gliding slowly over your top. "And why should a mild migraine interfere with your ability to undress?"

"Well, you see…" you start to explain, but Law cuts you off as he drags his fingers slowly along your sides, towards the hem of your shirt. "Seems to me like you want my help for another reason," he says with a smug grin. "But how could I deny you that, when you´ve been so good up until now?"

He softly places a kiss on your neck before helping you pull off your top, leaving you only in your bra. His tan tattooed hands quickly roam over your clothed breasts, as his lips continue to trail along your neck. "Might as well check for some lumps while we're at it," Law mumbles into your skin, his teeth lightly grazing your sensitive spots. He unhooks your bra to gain better access to your breasts.

Once the lacy material comes off, his slender fingers massage the outermost layer of your breasts, gradually moving in circles. You can't help but stifle a moan, even though the fabric of his gloves is still between his smooth skin and yours, creating a unique sensation. As his fingers reach your nipples, he grazes over them, causing them to tighten. "I-I don't know if that's really necessary for the diagnosis, Doctor," you huff, searching for Law's mouth with your own.

"Oh, but I've heard it does wonders for a patient's well-being," he grins into the kiss, seeking your approval. As you nod, Law quickly reprimands you with a firm squeeze of your thigh. "Mind your manners. You have to answer your doctor properly, or I won't be able to diagnose you correctly." You squeal at his action, a quick "Yes" escaping your lips.

"Yes…?" he tries again, teasingly biting your lip with his teeth.

"Yes, Doctor Trafalgar" you moan, desperate for more stimulation. "That's right."

Slowly, Law glides down your body, his hands cupping every curve of your torso as he continues his exploration.

As Law reaches your breasts, his mouth cups around one mound of your nipple, sucking sweetly on the pink, hard bud. Another moan escapes you, and Law continues to massage your other breast with utmost care, while his other hand lightly traces circles over your thigh. As he switches sides, tending to your other nipple with his tongue, he switches the side of your thigh as well.

With so much happening at the same time, you can't help but squeeze your legs together. The heat that starts to accumulate in your lower body becomes too much to handle without proper relief. The cold steel table underneath you provides support, but you crave something more. Luckily, just as you're about to say something, Law pulls away from you, a small connecting line of saliva still linking your nipple to his mouth.

Quickly wiping it away, he gives you a quick peck on the lips, mumbling, "All clear. Found no anomalies." You sigh into the kiss, and your hands slowly wrap around his neck, gently cradling it with your nails.

"Well, that's good to know," you respond. Law responds with a low rumble in his tattooed chest before slowly pulling away, leading the two of you through the room. However, with your nude breasts right in front of him, nipples perky and glossy from his earlier attention, it's hard for him to deny his building arousal.

He slowly approaches you once again, one of his gloved hands trailing down your right side before coming to rest atop your plush thighs, and his other hand cupping your chin gently. Your lips are close to touching, and he whispers with ragged breath, "Are there any other things we should check? Maybe around here? I haven't had the pleasure of performing your pelvic exams yet.", he muses, slowly dragging his hand that rested on your thigh over your abdomen, his fingers drawing small circles on it.

"Yeah, good idea," you breathe out, your breath hitching as you squirm under Law's hot touch. His skilled fingers swiftly free you from your pants, leaving you only in a pair of panties

"These will also need to go," Law hums, snapping the band of the lacy fabric, earning a quiet moan from you. You complain that it's unfair for only you to be nude. Law grins into the kiss he plants on your neck, before adding, "Now, now. It wouldn't be very professional of me to strip in front of my dear patient, right y/n-ya?" He quirks an eyebrow, giving you a teasing smirk as his hands slowly start to cup the mound of your clothed vagina, his fingers sliding tauntingly slow over the small hill.

"Fine, then let me do it, Dr. Heartbreaker," you huff, slowly opening up his shirt, revealing the tan tattooed artwork of black curved ink that covered his chest. You gradually trace over Law's chest, your fingers rippling slowly over each of his abdominal pecs, following the small black happy trail.

Just as you reach the hem of his pants, Law grasps your panties, sliding them to the side. His fingers delve carefully between your swollen folds, gathering the slickness with a naughty grin on his lips. "Seems like you definitely don't have a lubrication issue," he remarks.

"Law!" you huff, your fingers gripping on the cold steel under you, searching for more pressure from his gloved fingertips. Law is all too happy to satisfy your craving, his two gloved fingers diving deep into you just after chuckling to himself. "Sorry, sorry," he mutters.

The feeling of the firm rubber initially makes you cringe for a second, but you quickly adapt to the foreign sensation. You even relax a bit, enjoying the chilled texture it provides. With a stifled moan, you push yourself against him, desperate for stimulation. You're relieved to notice that Law has gripped your hips with his other hand to stabilize you on the table. His fingers start slowly but surely moving in and out of you.

The squelching sound of the rubber gloves and the juices of your cunt only spurred you on more, when Law hit that very special spot inside you. “Fuck, right there.” You moaned, arms slung around Laws neck, trying to hold the angle that gave you the so much needed stimulation, the heat in your core rising and rising until it was close to snapping. Law seemed to realize exactly how close you were to cumming, because just when you tensed up, close to spilling over he retreated his gloved fingers, the most self-sufficient smile on his sharp features.

“God, no, you´re so mean!” you quiver, legs shaky from the sudden break of contact, your orgasm ruined to no avail. “And you´re so very desperate.” He retorts with a sly grin, freeing himself of the gloves and disposing them on the small tray next to the table, before he´s back at your side, slowly opening up the button of his pants, peeling them down to reveal his clothed bock by a pair of dark spotted boxers. “But I know exactly the thing you need as a cure for that.”

You look down at him, eyeing the tent in Laws tight skinny jeans. You grin weakily, seeing the state he was in, slowly dragging your hand over him. “Do you now? Seems to me, like it´s more for your own treatment, Doctor.” Law groaned at the sudden contact of your hand on his clothed cock, sucking some air through gritted teeth as you dragged out the pet-name, before giving him a firm squeeze.

“Our treatment.” Law retorts, a groan escaping him as you pull his boxers down with much vigor, his tan cock springing free. You lick your lips at the sight. You´d always appreciated the stark contrast between Laws tan skin and the pink tip of his cock, but in combination with the trail of precum dripping down from it towards one of his most prevalent blue veins, you could feel your core throbbing with need to feel him as deep inside you, as he could possibly enter you.

Slowly you cradled his length, giving it a few taunting pumps, thumb swiping experimentally over his leaking cockhead. “And what does that treatment involve exactly?” you look up to him through long lashes, licking over your lips to moisten them.

Law replies with ragged breath. “You´ll just find out in about a second. Now, be a good girl and spread your legs.”

Your quick to oblige, settling yourself on the cold steel under you with your elbows, all spread out for your lover to see. He gazes at your form for a brief second, absolutely love drunk before the feeling of your knowing smirk gets to heavy. He quickly grabs a condom from the small tray on his right side, pulling it over his length, before he aligns himself quickly with your entrance. His hands wrap carefully around your hips to keep you in place, before calling your name.

“y/n-ya.”

You look up to him, surprised when he leans in for a loving kiss on your lips, slowly sliding inside you as he whispers, "I love you."

You moan at the pleasurable sensation that comes with Law's intrusion, his throbbing member filling you perfectly. As your walls adjust to being stretched since the last time you were intimate, you respond to your lover's declaration, tangling your hands in his black locks as you search for Law's lips.

"I love you too, Law," you mewl, feeling the doctor's erection stretching you. Law's breath hitches as you tighten around him. "God... you're so wet."

 "Just keep going," you moan, rocking your hips against his. A deep groan escapes Law as he slowly pulls out before forcefully thrusting his hips back into yours. "Fuck, Law!" you gasp wantonly, your captain groaning in response, holding you in place as he pounds your wetness with increasing intensity. "You're so desperate, y/n-ya, it's way too cute," Law huffs with a grin, partially withdrawing before hooking one of your legs around his hip.

"You're the one fucking me over your own OP table," you retort, crying out in pleasure when Law suddenly hits your sweet spot, a grin spreading across his face at your reaction. "And you're enjoying it," Law's dark voice resounds near your ears as he leans closer, angling himself to penetrate deeper into your soaked core.

Overwhelmed by pleasure, you cry out, digging your nails into your lover's tattooed back. Burying your head in his neck, you inhale Law's scent, the musky aroma mixed with alcohol making you dizzy. "You like it when your doctor fucks you like this, sweetheart? All spread out and at my mercy?" Law groans through clenched teeth, nearing climax.

"God, I love it!" you reply, the intense heat building up in your core suffocating you with each passing second. "And do you trust me, y/n-ya?"

You nod eagerly, capturing your lover in another passionate kiss before he presses his thumb against your throbbing clit, sending electric jolts through your body.

"Counter Shock."

For a brief moment, everything turns white as your orgasm crashes over you unexpectedly. Before you can comprehend what just happened, you realize that your mouth is wide open, Law's name slipping from your lips like a mantra, and your sweet juices flowing over his cock while your walls tighten around him, milking him until the last drop.

With a groan, the handsome surgeon climaxes inside you, a low moan of your name escaping his cracked lips as your sweaty bodies stick together on the operating table. Trying to catch your breath, you look up at Law, who is also trying to calm himself.

"What in the devil's fruit name was that?!" you ask. Law gives you a tired but mischievous grin.

"That was Counter Shock. I just discovered it recently. It's a Haki-infused electrical power." Law's eyes glint with mischief. You can only gasp at the revelation that your lover just brought you to orgasm through electrostimulation before playfully hitting him on the shoulder. "You're such a sick man, Trafalgar!"

"Coming strong from Miss Med-Kink." he said with a playful smirk, referring to the recent intimate moment they shared. With a nonchalant demeanor, he pulled out and efficiently put his trousers back on. Law promptly handed you a towel, gently wiping you down and planting a tender kiss on your temple.

Assisting you in getting back on your feet, you slowly dressed yourself while helping Law sanitize the room. As you stood just outside the heavy iron door, the scent of alcohol lingered instead of the previous scent of passion. Law glanced back at you before speaking.

"Oh, and y/n-ya," he called out to you.

You turned to face your captain. "Yes?"

He cleared his throat before continuing. "This time, everything we just experienced remains strictly confidential. Understood?"

You flashed a mischievous grin, giving him a wink before resuming your position, leaving Law blushing behind.

"Of course, dear doctor."

[1000sunnygo]

The Three Captain's Interview (2021) : Hiroshi Kamiya as Law (Translated)

Awfully late to the party again. Here's a partial translation of the "Three Captains QnA" interview conducted in 2021 to celebrate the 100th volume of One Piece. I think most readers already accessed the translation via auto translator, or maybe someone translated already (in that case, ignore this)

I didn't find any available translation so I'm putting all of Hiroshi Kamiya's answers here. Just in case you don't know, Kamiya san in Law's voice actor. His answers were particularly long and informative, so I focused only on him.

Starts below the cut!

-

Q. How did you feel when you got the role?

- The casting of Namikawa san (Eustass Kidd) and I was triggered by the work "Ilya no Sora, UFO no Natsu", in which Namikawa san played the role of a timid boy in junior high school and I was a sharp-tongued senior. Hiroaki Shibata, who was the producer of that work, later became the producer of One Piece and then approached us.

I understood the flow of the process and was grateful for the offer, but both Namikawa san and I were good at giving higher pitched voices at that time. So, to be honest, we had absolutely no idea what he had in mind when he cast us. But since I was approached and I had no choice but to give it a go, I gave the character a rough, low-pitched sound that didn't go well with my personal theme but matched the character's appearance; and they gave me an OK...

But, adding a personal note, I voiced an unnamed role 'Pirate A' all the way back in the first episode. I had a few more roles afterwards, and eventually I was given the role 'Eddy' in the Sky Island Arc. After a short interval, I was very happy to be chosen for a major role with the name 'Law' and as a rookie with over a hundred million bounty like Luffy.

By nature, the sounds I make don't have a distinct quality, so I didn't have much of a chance to be cast in "ONE PIECE" filled with unique characters. But thinking about it, Law doesn't really have any outstanding feature either (laughs). Regardless, I am very grateful that I was selected out of all other choices.

(T/N: I made a separate post about Kamiya san's roles in one piece here.)

-

Q. Did you have any specific thoughts or feelings while playing in One Piece?

- I really wanted to play Law as a child. The past with Corazon is inseparable from the present Law, isn't it? Since Law at the moment is here because of that past, I really wanted to incorporate the childhood Law into my character.

Also, in the long history of One Piece, Luffy is the only male character who is played by the same actor for both his adult and child versions. There had never been a male voice actor who had the chance, so I had a personal ambition to set a precedent. The moment I found out that Law's past was going to be portrayed, I made a blunt confession that I absolutely wanted to play the (child Law) role. I later auditioned and was hired.

When the time came to record the episodes of Law's past and I was given a script with "Law, Hiroshi Kamiya" right next to Luffy, it meant a lot to me. Seeing the senior members of the One Piece cast team playing the main characters and monopolizing the studio microphones, I had always wanted to play as a main character in the same place someday. Unfortunately, I never had the chance, so, that time it felt like a dream come true.

I think this, too, was possible because it's a story created by Oda sensei. To begin with, it's rare for me to put up my hand to take an initiative by myself. The possibility of trying out a role and then people thinking "Totally off, this shouldn't be their voice at all" - is terrifying, isn't it? I'm a person lacking self-confidence, yet, Oda sensei created a work that moved my heart and made me feel like I wanted to express my tone, and thus I was able to have such a joyful experience. So, once again, I think One Piece is amazing.

(T/N: Kamiya san talking about voicing young Law in a different interview can be found here.)

-

Q. Impression of the character you're currently playing?

- I think he's a man with a deep sense of responsibility. After all, the alliance was originally formed to defeat Doflamingo by taking advantage of Luffy's desire to beat the 'Emperors', and now even after defeating him, they're still working together. That makes him an honest guy who keeps his words.

That said, he's the captain of the Heart pirates. I think he wants to reciprocate the feeling to the crew that follows him with a belief that he's the best in the world. That's why when he said "I hate breads!" and the Straw hats kept pulling him like "you're one of us too!" (laughs), he kept holding his stance, "I'm NOT gonna go that way!"

-

Q. Thoughts on Mayumi Tanaka as Luffy?

- I saw Mayumi san leading the anime like a boss from the moment Luffy came out of the barrel shouting "I SLEPT WELL!" in episode 1. The fact that it continues to go strong and become more popular with the viewers to this day - is truly amazing.

-

Q. Thoughts on Daisuke Namikawa as Kidd?

- I think Namikawa san is ridiculous! After all, back at that time he would only play characters with meek voices, I really thought he didn't have the voice range to be entrusted with such a dynamic role. I think he threw his own persona away to play Kidd.

-

Q. Do you think it's possible to win against Kaidou?

- It has to be. I think Luffy would be able to beat him with something beyond Law's strategy. To Law, Luffy is the one person that can create unexpected circumstances. I believe their actions would blossom meaningfully in future.

-

Source: @Eiichiro_staff (search up the hashtag #三船長QA on Twitter)

[smolwritingchick]

Ah ok! Update and Three Smol Previews for Bangtan Gal :)

Okay, good news, I am hoping to post the wrestling chapters tomorrow or Tuesday at the latest. It's almost done. Gonna let that be for a bit after I post and continue focusing on Bangtan Gal. A few chapters are boring imo but the later chapters have more drama.

Also, good news with Bangtan Gal, the second chapter I plan to post, MAMA Awards 2016 is done. I just need to reread and edit.

It's 18,000+ words. I...went overboard. I am so sorry. I don't know how to stop. I guess pace yourself?? I had a lot of ideas and it kept flowing. It's MAMA Award heavy and I was writing about people's reactions.

I have to split the MAMA Awards chapter into Part 1 (A big moment happens) and Part 2 (Jennie's response to Hyuna) because I can't fit all my words in one Tumblr post. (It's THAT bad lmfao this never happened to me before. I have a problem)

So I will link both parts of that chapter in the author's note and masterlist when it's uploaded. You'll also see the links at the end of the chapter to continue reading or to go back to read part 1 of that chapter.

All I need to do is work on is the chapter before. Which is The 3rd Muster chapter. It shouldn't take too long. Once that's done and edited, expect those two and a half chapters to be released together. Thanks for your patience! I hope the writing isn't too crazy with what I have planned.

I truly liked the ideas I came up with :)

Here's another smol preview for the MAMA Award chapter. Three Smol Scenes.

------

The day of the MAMA Awards was finally here. The day Jennie anticipated the most. She had a good feeling about this show and was excited to show off her hard work with what she had planned. The morning of the show, she decided to tweet one simple word along with an eyebrow raising hashtag.

'Bet. #GonBeAnInteresting24Hours #Jen' 

Jennie had been a trending topic on Naver and various K-Pop news outlets, which caused people to anticipate the MAMA Awards even more to see what might happen and if she may respond to Hyuna. Her silence on the matter had been a hot topic and now with her tweet going viral, fans stirred in a frenzy.

-------

With the show getting ready for the next segment, Jennie suddenly received a few packs of smarties from Jungkook.

"How'd you know I was about to ask?" she happily accepted them with surprise in her voice.

"I brought some with me just in case. I was paying attention to your facial expression. When you're about to ask for smarties or say that you wish you had them, you make this cute face. It's like you're pouting,"

"What? I was not pouting..." She turned away, feeling her face warm as he giggled.

"You just did it again,"

"Stop looking at me," she playfully pushed him away, making him laugh harder.

------

Suddenly, Hyuna had changed some of her lyrics, not looking Jennie's way as she danced.

Not a high and mighty girl scout in the club behind some fake bulletproof glass. How boring.

Some idols widened their eyes while others glanced over to where Jennie sat.

Yet another diss? This was getting out of control.

Bam Bam cringed and glanced at Jennie with worry, hoping she'd be all right. Hayoon frowned at the diss and shook her head slightly.

However, Jennie only smirked as she continued to watch, knowing that all eyes were on her to see how she'd react. Bangtan glanced at her and as she met their eyes, she gave them a nod. They nodded back and remained calm as they continued to watch the performance.

Suddenly a switch flipped in Jennie's demeanor as she rolled her neck and stared at Hyuna.

'This bitch got me fucked up...' she thought as she kept her cool.

Fans tweet:

'Not again!! Enough already!'

'Is she trying to provoke Jennie?'

'Don't be mad if Jennie catches her in an alley to stomp that ass!'

'The neck roll! I repeat! The neck roll! Jennie just did the neck roll! That is BAD! She got something planned! Get ready!'

'I don't like how she's acting. This is bullying at this point. Hyuna needs to chill,'

'Jen better than me because I would have ran on stage and popped her shit,'

'From the looks of it, Jennie is so bitter and jealous,'

'That smirk means business. I'm not ready,'

'I wish people would stop judging Jennie,'

'Jennie looks like she's plotting,'

'Why does she look so hot when she's upset?'

'Bangtan knows something that we don't because they don't look bothered at all,'

'Bangtan isn't even phased?! What is Jennie planning tonight?'

[sonofapunk]

I know nothing about anarky. What makes him so trans?

Thank you so much for asking, anon! I'm gonna go ahead and jump right in! (And I will do my best to keep this focused on gender, with very light context, so if you want to know more about this character in general, please feel free to ask follow-up questions!)

Word count: A little over 2100

Trigger Warnings for: mentions of gender dysphoria, discussions of gender presentation and bodies, assumptions of a character's gender identity, comic-standard violence, transphobia, and death. (Note: If I've missed something that you'd like a heads-up for both in this list, and before it happens in the text, let me know! <3)

So, in 1989, Alan Grant/DC debuted one Lonnie Machin a.k.a. Anarky!

Lonnie was posed as a challenger to Batman, someone who makes him think about his methods and choices. Alfred comments in Lonnie's debut, even, that Lonnie is a "kindred spirit" to Batman. Bruce disagrees, but he does admit that there's some similarities there, which calls into question vigilantism as a form of justice, and what methods vigilantes should and shouldn't be using, in Bruce's mind. (Sidenote: there's this great moment in Tec 609 where Lonnie analyzes how Batman works, and it makes Lonnie and Bruce's similarities and differences extremely stark. It's one of my favorite parts of Lonnie's two-part comic debut).

At any rate, I bring all this up to establish that, as a baseline, Lonnie's character tends to call into question understood norms. Lonnie himself is a subversion of many thought-to-be-truths. Anarchism itself does the same thing. By that idea alone, there is already a baseline for defying things like the gender binary, assigned gender at birth, and expected gender roles and presentation.

With that in mind, I'm going to get into some specific moments that really solidify the many possibilities for a trans headcanon for this character! (I myself headcanon Lonnie as nonbinary, but there's arguments that can made for any identity under the trans umbrella, which is what this essay will argue for!).

The first point I want to make is about Lonnie's first Anarky costume. This one:

I chose this specific drawing of the costume because it's on the cover of Lonnie's debut comic, which means that this is the very first instance of Lonnie that many people ever saw. It also shows very well the aspects of this costume that I want to talk about.

We've got the hat with the circle-A, which draws attention to it by how much it stands out. We have the massive, flowing cloak. And we have the absence of a visible face. I'm gonna talk about each of those in turn.

The Hat - the hat's main purpose is to show you exactly who and what Lonnie aligns with as Anarky. The name isn't just for show; the circled-A, according to its real-world meaning, summarizes how order can found through anarchy, a theory that Lonnie is an adamant believer in, and defender of. Anarky is announcing for you who Anarky is. Think about gender presentation now, and what quick, shorthand ways we use to try and present as our desired gender (not just male, female, nonbinary, but also a flower, the color blue, a certain aesthetic that cultivates gender euphoria-- there's as many genders as we have the imagination to create!) Right away, we are already being shown a person that Lonnie wants you to think of him as.

The Cloak (warning for a mention of dysphoria and body image here) - This cloak is huge and billowing and closed, so there is nothing that you can see beneath it; it's all draped red fabric with no form or shape. It honestly makes me think of dysphoria hoodies, and how they can be protective and comfortable because they hide one's body. And in fact, this is exactly why Lonnie chose this cloak: it hides his frame. In the comic, it's implied to be because Lonnie is a young teenager, and he wants others to think that he's an adult, so that they'll listen to him, but the way I see it: it also serves to hide Lonnie's gender. Anarky is a reflection of the common people, and is determined to be their amplifier. Anarky being of an indeterminate gender is one further way that Anarky could relate to the people that Lonnie is trying to uplift.

The Mask (warning for a mention of deadnames in this section)- In this cover, it's drawn in shadow, but in the comic itself, we see that Anarky wears a gold, full-face mask. It completely obscures any identifying features on Lonnie's face. (As a nonbinary person, myself... what a mood). This is because Lonnie does not want Lonnie to be recognized as a voice of the people, but Anarky. In Anarky (1997), Lonnie explains that he does not care who Batman is under the mask, because Batman is the figure he's concerned with. I argue that this can be applied to Anarky, too. The point of Anarky is that the people can find strength and power through this figure, as I've said probably too many times now. Repetition for emphasis! Gotta love that English Lit degree. Anyway, this is very important because it's the same as the Spider-Man effect: anyone could be Spider-Man. Anyone could be Anarky. Now, what I mean by "Anyone could be Anarky," is that anyone could be wearing that mask. Something that I find extremely fascinating is that Lonnie reportedly does not care about how others think of him-- yet, he does protect Anarky's reputation. I think that this is because, the moment that the common people no longer feel safe around Anarky, is the moment that Anarky can no longer exist the way that Anarky is supposed to. When that presentation, when that self, is damaged by the others around it, what can we do but feel as if we have to defend it, even if we don't really care how others think of us? There's a lack of attention of Lonnie Machin, but there is an overabundance of attention on Anarky (see: Shadow of the Bat #41, where Lonnie signs a letter as Anarky, claiming that "Lonnie Machin" is the alias). This calls to attention the idea of deadnames. If Anarky is the desired presentation and identity, then it could be said that Lonnie acts as the deadname.

Now, if you're not totally regretting asking yet, let's move on to point #2! The second costume!

This one will be quicker: The main idea I want to get across here is that once again, we're seeing rapid declarations of identity with the large circle-A on the chest, and that we've still retained the lack of identifying features.

(Second warning for assumptions of someone's gender. Another warning as well that if you read the comic mentioned below, the comment that the reporter makes is presented to be a joke, which I do believe was made in poor taste. Please proceed with caution, and take care of yourself if you choose to read it <3).

What's significant to me about this costume is what happens in Young Justice: Sins of Youth #1. Anarky attends a rally for young heroes, and the reporter commenting on the event doesn't recognize all of the heroes present, and so has to rely on extremely vague assumptions about the characters. It's the specific assumption that this reporter makes that intrigues me: The reporter assumes that Anarky is a woman. Based on what we've been discussing so far, this tells me, personally, that what I think Lonnie is trying to do with Anarky's costume is working. It's difficult to figure out anything about Anarky as a person, and so the people looking at Anarky try to guess. It's even more significant to me that this happens after we lose the shapeless cloak. Even without the cover that that cloak gave, Anarky still has no identifying features beyond what Lonnie wants you to see.

(Warning for violence, bodily harm, torture, and transphobic comments in this next section. No pictures will be shown. We are still discussing expectation and perception of one's gender that may cause dysphoria as well. Please proceed with caution, and take care of yourself <3).

Another significant piece of this costume for me is that in an encounter with Ra's al Ghul, the circle-A on the costume serves as the inspiration for a form of torture, wherein the circle-A is cut into Lonnie's chest. It's taking a piece of Lonnie's identity presentation and forcibly making it a part of his body. I bring this up because I think that it's important to discuss the idea of presentation being forced upon us. Even after someone comes out, we are still held to certain expectations of how we present our chosen identities.

Another example of expectation in Lonnie's own experiences is how Shadow of the Bat #40-41 raises the notion that Lonnie was expected to become the All-American Boy by his parents. He's told that he's outside of what he was "supposed" to be: he doesn't play baseball, he should have been a doctor or a lawyer, and he reads things that are seen as abnormal (leftist political theory).

Lonnie expresses in a letter that he writes in #41 that he hopes that one day, his parents will be proud of him, and he calls himself their son. This is note-worthy because he is fulfilling part of the role that his parents placed on him ("boy"), but he also admits in this letter that he knows that he cannot be what they want him to be. He asks that they are the ones who transform their thinking, to accept him as he is, not as they want him to be. This is also the letter which he uses to fake the death of Lonnie Machin, so that he can work full-time as Anarky. This letter reads as a parallel to a coming out letter, in my opinion. (Transphobia warning) It also lines up with this specific notion that certain parents of trans children have expressed before, which is that it feels as though the kid they knew from birth is dying or dead. As someone whose parents expressed that idea to me, I do not support telling your child this, as it's rooted in transphobia, but it is significant to me that this is something we see in a situation that strongly mirrors what Lonnie is doing in the comics.

My third point that I'd like to bring up is extremely short, but it has to do with that A scar, so warnings for blood and bodily harm in the images that you will see if you click on the links provided. I'm providing links, so that anyone who wants to read this still can, but can opt in to seeing images of a bloody injury.

Lonnie, particularly in Anarky (1999), is drawn in parallel to two women in classic art.

Lonnie + Truth Coming Out of Her Well to Shame Mankind

Lonnie + Ophelia

Lonnie Ophelia + Bruce Ophelia (supplementary)

These parallels do not feel accidental to me-- especially the one with Truth.

It's noteworthy to me that Lonnie Machin is almost always drawn with long hair. Now, anyone can have long hair, of course, but when you look at the All-American Boy expectation, and then you look back to how Lonnie looks even out of the Anarky costume, I think there's something to be said there about how even Lonnie Machin subverts gender expectation.

Now, since this has already gotten longer than I ever meant for it to be, I'm going to stop here for now, since these are the main points that I wanted to cover in discussing the trans umbrella headcanon for Lonnie!

I want to close just by saying that all headcanons are valid for this character, and so I don't intend to imply that anyone who reads this HAS to feel the way that I do. This is just how I see and read Lonnie's character/comics, and it brings me a lot of joy, particularly as someone who relates heavily to a lot of Lonnie's experiences in the trans parallel experience kind of way. I love this character to pieces, and it brings me nothing but happiness to share him with you and anyone else who read this far. So I'll also say, to anyone reading this: thank you so much for hearing me out!! It means a lot. I hope that you took caution and care in reading about some of these topics, since I know firsthand how hard they can be to experience, so do something nice for yourself today! Take some time to breathe, slow down, and enjoy a nice treat or two. You've earned it!

And if this essay has convinced you to read more about Lonnie Machin: welcome to the autonomous Machin collective! We're happy to have you here! <3

[little-nobody]

guys i'm abt to start drawing Mike to cope bc i like this idea i had a bit ago that Will compares Mike's freckles to the stars and i came up with some stupid cheesy line that isn't stupid and i love it and ended up writing some short thing for it....

and now i'm impulsively copy pasting the thing i wrote for it...

The grass tickled my cheeks as I stared up at the clear sky, stars mingling with one another. It was such a beautiful, peaceful night, perfect for stargazing. Alone or otherwise, it was a wonderful night to be out watching the stars- I never would've known things like these if I hadn't met him...

"Do you remember the night you flirted with me?" My voice cut through the silence, earning a small hum from the boy laying next to me. "You mean when I was drunk?" His voice was soft yet sure, not an ounce of anxiety or doubt slipping into his words. It was always so refreshing whenever he spoke like that.

Still, I couldn't hold back a small laugh as I leaned up a bit. "Yes," I looked down at him, his gaze shifting from the stars to my own "that night." He smiled up at me, but not just any smile- it was that soft smile, the one he gave me when he was focused on what I was saying, when he was genuinely listening to me.

"Do you remember what you said to me?" I heard him let out a huff through his nose, one of his brows raising as he looked me in the eyes. "I said lots of things, Mike," his gaze was focused, not wavering "You'll have to be more specific." I couldn't help but sigh, resting on the arm closest to him.

"About how the most beautiful things happen during the night," I heard him hum, urging me to continue. "How there are secrets only the night sky can share," I let my eyes shamelessly rake over his face, taking in his features as I did so. "Saving them for people who will appreciate the memory?"

He nodded his head slightly, smiling up at me. "Yes, I remember," he reached his hand up to move some of the curls from my face, tucking them behind my ear. "Starry-eyed angel," his hand rested on my cheek, caressing it gently with a soft, teasing tone in his voice.

I could feel heat rise up on my face, dusting my cheeks as he stared me in the eyes. "Freckles like stars," he continued, sitting up slowly as he got a little closer to my face. "Eyes with galaxies in their wake," his eyes dragged across my face, his hand tracing down my shoulder- I'm guessing he saw my freckles there too.

"The universe spilling all across your body," he leaned forward some more, glancing down at my lips for a brief moment before looking back into my eyes- his breath didn't smell like last time, it wasn't tainted with that fruity alchol- he wasn't drunk this time, neither of us were.

"The more I touch you," his fingers traced down my arm, hazel eyes shifting to track his own movements, tracing patterns on my skin that I never knew were there. "The more of you I see," he let his fingers move on my side, looking me in the eyes as he slid them under the back of my shirt, a silent request to see if he could proceed. I stared back at him, hoping my gaze would be enough of a 'yes, please' for him.

I couldn't help but let the red that dusted my cheeks spread as his hand reached under my shirt, trailing up my back. His movements were so delicate and fluid, his fingertips calloused and warm. My breath hitched lightly when they would press down and trace patterns, almost like he was burning constellations into my skin.

"The more I begin to realize," my eyes shifted to focus on his lips- so soft and pretty, colored like one of those pinkish sunsets you see in the sky. "Realize what, Will?" I shouldn't have been shocked at the way my voice shook, but a small part in the back of my brain was. Curiosity flowed through my being, scorch marks traced along my skin as two of Will's fingers moved to touch my bottom lip.

"You didn't steal the stars from the sky, Mike," for a moment I was confused, something tugging at my heart as his fingers moved down from my bottom lip. It faded as they found their way behind my neck, letting his next sentence ghost over my lips.

"The sky stole the stars from you"

[girlsexbattle2]

Spoilers for Laika Aged Through Blood

Summary:

I have autism so im going to make a master post of all the coming and going themes in Laika

WIP - Feel free to add.

Its literally an post-apocalyptic world. what more do i need to say.

Mentionin, theres a quest that involves human bones? Are all furries humans? Did there used to be our world humans before doom fell? Did the animals mutate? The only non-human intellect i can think of is the whales in the ocean which is a stretch.

Jacobs Cassettes - Hes gone but hes with you the whole game. You add on to what he began. Something he loved. (and Laika makes fun (?) of him for shooting the player to get the thing out but thats the only way she will open them after his death).

Spirits - on the nose here but literally talks to those who have past. She cannot move on (to the after life). People only talk to her about it when they want comfort that their loved ones are okay (She has no idea).

Laika Herself - Starts the game wanting to die. Whole existence is defined by the daughter that she was forced to have. The one she loves more than anything else. She hates the curse. She hates the idea of Puppy taking her place more. The people around her set her worth to her warrior ability. She does anything but train Puppy, which puts her clan in state of disaster. Her reason to live was because the people need her. All she does all day is what other people tell her to do. Her excuse for not finding pochiee (?) was the elder told her to do otherwise. Maya straight up tells her that she shouldn't think and just do what the elder says. Laika speaks out against the elder but still enacts thier will.

In her journal writes about how futile thier resistance is. As the game goes on she does all these fetch quest. She doesn't understand why she bothers but 'its the difference between living and survival'. She says it gives the villagers and her hope. Puppy gets kidnapped due to Laika not prioritizing her grief. (For having death be desensitized) (Puppy being sheilded from death) She drops everything to save her daughter. She sees that even the bird citizens hate thier government and are going on suicide missions (they die either way) for the prospect of peace. She laughs at them because she sees them as they want to appear - The Ultimate Unity - The Living Machine - not as the scared and whipped people they are. She kills all involved in the kidnapping. Puppy gets the fever that killed all her other daughters. Laika comes face to face with the fact she may not be immortal anymore or another loved one will die. (She takes her helmet off at this point idk why) Kills 'god' and immediately told afterwards that Puppy will live (Laika wont) the bomb drops and she jumps down after it. She accepts death somberly so her loved ones will live.

Little Moments

Ray? Rotiers? Boat Man. Lost his family to the birds. The only way he can afford to eat is to work for them. How he thinks of his father when he sees the light house. Laika telling him about the view-

Mini point: The ocean is filled with debris and filth at the coast line but when you can look out to the far horizon the water is clear. Laika sees a whale. (symbol of the beauty of the old world and how they were thought to be gone)

- Laika apologizes because he wanted to leave and she was to focused on the goal to care. He says dont be. He sees ghost whales. Laika can only imagine.

Mina- Gives Laika an invitation to her birthday. Laika is touched but before she can get her thanks out Mina asks her to give it to her brother. Bro is dead, still had a present for her. Laika gives the news and gift to Mina and is paid with silence.

Pebbles - The fucking iris and the prettiest pebble. Laika knows its impossible that Iris put it there but tells Pebble otherwise. All dialogue with them after this point is them talking about Iris.

Dominat Birds- Thier goal is to rise above the petty trials of life and death and ascend to godhood as the sole race. Lose thier humanity in the process. Also All in one government plan. (Millitary Law and God i think? i was to busy backflipping to catch that) Assimilation. The fact the birds have thier ability to sing taken away at birth.

[xinyansbiggestfan]

Xinyan x Adventurer!Reader - First Meeting

The scent of flowers and perfume filled the air, and a few petals were guided in the gentle breeze along with their sensory counterpart. The sky was clear of clouds or birds, giving a clear view to the gleaming sun that shone down upon you. The warmth brushes against your face like the caress of heaven itself. Chimes rocked back and forth, creating a soft rhythm to counter your heavy pace. Your stomach growled as you pass a stand with various goods. Many you didn't know, but you want to learn of in this moment. The atmosphere itself didn't help either; a young couple chatting over tea, children playing around in the street, an elder woman tending to a small hearth, and all the other chores of the locals.

A smile crept upon your lips, and your steps became quicker as you move further away from the pier and further into the city. You had finally made it. After saving countless Mora, multitudes of blood, sweat, and tears, and even getting a well-paying sponsorship, you had arrived to Liyue. The Land of Prosperity. The Nation of Wealth.

Your next adventuring territory.

Rumors were spread about the skilled warriors within Liyue. "Adeptus", you had heard them be referred to that term. Some type of ancient fighter that had withstood years, possible centuries, of wars and battles.

There were also rumored Regivines that burned instead of chilled their opponents, essentially cooking them alive. And all of the countless Hilichurls, Mitachurls, and Samachurls littering the place as well. Who know what was all out there!

There was so much to see in Liyue. So much to explore. So much to fight. You didn't know what was waiting for you out there, but you needed to find it, meet it, right, no- URRRRRRRGGGH

Or, maybe after something to eat.

"Hah, I knew I shouldn't skipped lunch on the boat. That fish looked real questionable, though." You murmur to yourself, glancing at every food stall or restaurant that caught your eye.

Everything smells really good, though something about the notes burns your nose a bit. And lots of things looked very filling. You do need to eat plenty to keep up your energy, but if you eat too much, then you'll be slow when going out on commissions. Ehh, but that one stand with the dough balls looks really good-

"What is this?!"

A man's bellowing roar rips through the air, causing everyone that could have heard it to halt in what they are doing.

Your body tensed, but a smile perks on your lips as your feet move without thought. That sounds like something needing your attention.

You hurry towards the volume, already smelling flowers. Now with a hint of ash and charcoal.

"Just what are you trying to push here? First you go screaming that incoherent noise to any poor sucker around you, now you're burning my Glaze Lilies!" A man yelled, wildly gesturing to a mildly burning flower shop.

His assistants were rushing to put the fires out, but his focus was primarily on... Wow.

"Look, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to start burning your product, I just got some chord ideas and had to test them out real quick!" An angel of a woman was standing opposite of the man, her stunning amber eyes holding genuine sympathy. An accent unlike none other gave a charm to her words.

The woman's dark brown skin had a natural gleam to it, and it matched the gloss of her beautiful, and spiky, brown-black hair put into two upwards pigtails. Streaks of hearth orange also decorated her hair. Same with the spiked collars keeping her hair up. She wore an elaborate, loud, colorful outfit focused on reds, oranges, and blacks, with white to help break up the other colors.

In her hands was a well-crafted string instrument, something like a lyre but with a different shape. And, an axe blade on the very bottom. Perfectly curved and pointed, and you could tell it could slice a hair in two with ease.

So this is what the women of Liyue are like. You think to yourself, the breath out of your lungs and your sea-lag now gone.

"Well what am I supposed to do with burned flowers? Let my customers think I'm an arsonist?"

"I can pay for them, all the burned ones!"

"Please, like you could pay for all of this!" The man snarls.

You could see a twinge of hurt in the woman's eyes. And now, you remember why you followed the yelling in the first place.

"That contraption should handle it."

"No!" The woman retorted, pulling her instrument away when the man tried to grab it.

"Hey, hey," You speak while moving between the two, "no need to get grabby, sir! That's a bit much!" You remark, keeping your arms up while giving the man a bewildered look.

"Wha-who are you? You connected with this crazy lady?" The man asks, pointing behind you.

"I just don't think older gentleman should be grabbing at young women, sir." You state with an emphasis, having a more mischievous smile as your hands moved down.

The man's face quickly went flush.

You hear a quiet snort behind you, and a suppressed giggle followed soon after.

"I wasn't doing that! That lady burned down half of my flower stand, and I'm getting compensation!" The man continued to yell.

"And did she not kindly offer to pay for all of the burned flowers?" You ask in return, waving a hand back to the woman as you gave her a quick glance.

"I did. And if the stall got burned, I can help rebuild it!" The woman offered, moving closer beside you. "I'm real good with tools! I mean I made my own lyre and-"

"Shut it, I don't want to hear anything from you! And you, rando, how about you mind your business?" The man 'offers' to you.

You now notice the two helpers, surprisingly built for a flower shop, moving behind their boss. Seems they were done with putting out the flames.

"Afraid not, sir. I cannot mind my own business." You retort, keeping your smile as you stay in place.

The older man's lip curled into a sneer.

"Now," The older man's right finger jabbed at your chest, "you listen-"

Your right hand immediately caught his hand, and using your thumb, put enough pressure to push his index finger to an uncomfortable angle.

The older man yelped, and the two helpers braced while glaring at you.

"Don't." You warn, your smile now gone. And your left hand occupied.

It was at this point that the flower shop workers, and you assume the woman, notice the small decoration on your adventuring attire.

A golden charm with a brilliant lighted vassal of elemental power. Your Vision. And boy was it aglow.

Silence crept into the air as you glared at the older man, the helpers unmoving and the woman still in surprise.

"Now, you are going to accept the kind woman's offer to pay for your damaged product, you are going to take it, and you are going to move on with your day. Okay? Shake on it." You state, shifting your right hand to shake the older man's right hand.

Your left hand lost its grip on your Vision.

You let go of the older man's hand, and he stared at his limb in surprise before gulping.

"Sure, yeah. Uh, let me add everything up." The older man stated. A gesture of his unbroken hand made his helpers rush to the burned flowers and their pots.

You brush your hands off onto your top, your smile returning.

A breath of a laugh left the woman, making you focus on her now.

Her amber eyes were glowing even more, and a smile was plastered on her lips.

"You know how to be frightful, huh?" She asked.

"Only when I need to be. You all good? He seemed pretty pissed off." You comment, turning away from the stand and to better face her.

"Bah, I've had worse. Just got scared when he tried taking this," The woman held her lyre up a bit, "away from me. Worked way too hard to get it just right." She stated. She took a quick glance to the stand before leaning closer to you.

You tried to ignore the new warmth on your cheeks as you let her lean to your ear.

"And I'll be damned if I'm letting Petunia Pinkies even touch my lyre." She whispered to you.

Now it was your time to snort. Much louder though.

You cover your mouth as you try not to laugh too loudly, but you could feel Petunia Pinkies giving you and the woman a funny look.

"I've never seen you around here before. I'm Xinyan." The woman states, offering her left hand to you as she used her right to move the lyre on her back.

"I am new around here, actually, and I'm Y/N. Nice to meet you." You greet her with a quick shake.

"Nice meeting you too. Say, how about this, I buy you lunch? Consider it a welcome gift to Liyue." Xinyan offers as she places her hands on her hips.

"Oh," Your eyes widen with the new warmth returning, "well, uh, are you sure? I mean," You take a quick look to the flower shop, "you're handling all the flower payments."

"Yeah, but trust me, you earned a free meal." Xinyan remarks as she begins walking to the older man. Her hand darted up to give you a gentle smack on your upper back.

You let out a quiet yelp from the force. You can't stop a small smile as you reach your arm to rub the spot, watching Xinyan begin bargaining with the older man.

What a woman.

--

Let me know what you guys think!

[cardinalcopulate]

Hey hun an idea you could use

POV character moves into a new secluded sea side city that has a huge church at the peak

They don’t go to the church due to bad experiences in the past (they don’t realise it’s satanic)

On a rainy night back to their house they spot a rat and take it in to care of it

Then maybe he overhears people looking for a missing rat that belongs to copia and yn goes to take it back

When they meet sweet flirting ensues until it’s time to give back the pet but the pet wants to stay with YN, but because rats need to be in packs without getting lonely they come around daily to hang around copia and the rats

I think with how wonderfully you write this could be a cute fanfic, also you can Nick some elements and leave out others Idc have fun love

Anon x

Anon, I'm obsessed with this, it's so cute!! I had some time and let the words flow. Here's a snippet of what I wrote :p

- - - -

"What's your name, little guy?" I was coming around to it. The rat chittered in reply. "Can you understand me?" It sniffed and made some more noises. "Huh," I said more to myself than the rat. I stayed in my rather wet clothes, focused on it. I spent the next few hours playing with the animal, doing chores with it on my shoulder or riding in my pocket, and reading with it snoozing in my lap. I started to nod off when the rat suddenly stood at attention and ran off to the door. Mere seconds later, I heard a rushed knock. I jumped out of my seat to catch the rat and answer the door. I scooped it up and held it close to me again. I pulled the door open.

On the other side, there was a man drenched in rainwater. He had black streaks running down his cheeks and his hair looked dark brown. It was flat from water. His cheeks and tip of his sharp nose were rosy from the cold. "Hello! I'm sorry to intrude--," he rushed out and stopped abruptly. His eyes were mismatched, one a gentle green and the other an intense white. The man stared at me for a moment too long.

"Can I help you?" I felt uneasy under the gaze of that white eye.

"Um, yes. I was just--it might sound crazy but I'm looking for a rat. It's a pet of mine, of sorts. I'm really worried he's going to get sick or hurt. Have you seen it?" The rat in my hands squeaked and popped its head out. "Oh! My baby, there you are!" The man gasped. The rat jumped into his hands and nuzzled him. The man talked to it in the silly voice you might speak to a baby with. He clearly cared about the creature. It was endearing.

"Thank you so much for taking care of him! He must have been so scared. You really have no idea what this means to me!" His eyes were filled with relief. "Let's get you home," he said to the rat. Much to my surprise, it slipped out from his hands and scampered back up to my shoulder. The man blushed and scolded the rat. "Come on, you've overstayed your welcome. You've caused this kind man too much trouble already," he made eye contact and smiled softly at me. My cheeks burned. The rat refused to move from its seat. Even when i tried to pick it up and return it to the man, it stayed put in my hands.

"I'm really sorry about this, he's not normally this stubborn."

That's alright. Why don't you come in for a spell? Until he's ready to go home. You shouldn't keep standing in the rain." I was watching the man get more and more soaked by the minute. I was too entranced to say something earlier. He nodded and stepped over the threshold.

"Please, have a seat. Can I get you anything hot to drink? You must be freezing."

"Would it be okay if I had some tea? Any you have is fine."

"Of course! Is chamomile alright?"

"That's my favorite, it sounds perfect," he winked.

I turned around quickly so he didn't see my face. I started heating up some water and sat down at the table across from him.

"Ah, where are my manners? I never introduced myself. It's been a while since I've met such a handsome stranger." He leaned across the table with an outstretched hand. "Copia."

"Copia," I repeated. "Nice to meet you."

He kissed the back of my hand. "The pleasure is all mine." He had a coy smile on his face. Copia looked a bit messy with the makeup staining his cheeks. I glanced at them for a second and he became self-conscious. He blushed and frantically wiped his cheeks with the leather gloves on his hands.

- - - - -

I definitely want to work on this more, I think it's a lovely meet cute. Thank you, anon!

[felixtam]

Audiovision Blog Post week 5

1. Research (technical, academic, creative practice)

I didn't have much time to work on my project this week as I have had assignments due in other classes.

I have primarily been researching the environment gathering a lot of reference material, with footage and sound recordings from within small tight environments similar to the 'coffin rooms'. This helps me get a better idea of how I want to pan and layer the various diegetic elements within the scenes. The sound effects will be primarily diegetic with the soundtrack being the only proper non-diegetic sound element.

I have also run into a bit of a roadblock being the implementation of sound as this project will be in the form of a 360 degree video. I have begun learning how to implement this through various Youtube tutorials and other forums so it shouldn't be too much of a problem.

I want all the sounds to feel positioned correctly so that the viewer feels more immersed and doesn't feel disconnected from the world. This has led me to decide to record most of my sound directly in my room as the environment will be consistent and similar to that of a coffin house.

2. Reflection

Analysing the sound design for the 1998 film 'A Bug's Life', opened my eyes to a wide range of subtle implementations and storytelling techniques to enhance a film. While listening to the score-only playthrough, it shines a light on the music flow and subtle musical motifs used that are barely even noticeable within the complete final cut version. These small details not only inherently improve the movies pacing but also drive the emotion in the scene.

The various soundtracks and musical elements that are used to differentiate characters and emotions are clearly portrayed and help build a deeper connection between the characters and the audience.

Regarding the sound effects, I really liked the usage of visually comparable metaphors and the characterisation of certain sound effects with real-world similarities. An example is the fleet of fighter planes layered within the sounds of the grasshopper's wings fluttering. I feel that this builds such a rich and compelling sound composition, as it creates a sense of relatability when depicting a smaller-scale world and environment from the perspective of these smaller insects.

In future sound design projects, I really want to explore scale and different ways, as well as try my hand at the world of foley-based sound design using a wide variety of unorthodox items to create compelling sounds. I will definitely be referring back to the breakdown video in the future to better structure my sound layers of score, vocals and effects to get the cleanest and most refined final product.

Another thing I found interesting was the differentiation and contrast between the score and the sound design. The score provided the core emotional depth and energy to the film, with music tying in with the onscreen key moments. Randy Newman uses the small nuances of musicality and composition to illustrate the feeling the audience should be feeling (for example uplifting melodies might underscore scenes of heroism or success, while softer, more melancholic tunes might accompany moments of sadness and despair.

Alongside this, the sound design is focused towards grounding and imitating the small intricacies of the insect world. Heavy use of live foley and insect recordings are scattered within the composition to make the world feel more vibrant and tangible.

both elements ultimately work in harmony to enhance the overall viewing engagement and experience. Something I found interesting was the use of score being used as an emotional or thematic cue to present danger or something about to happen before it actually happens.

3. Progress

Again like I stated before I did not have a lot of time this week to work on my project so I mainly did some small testing and planning work.

I have started to create a sound map for how I want each section of the video will play out, along with what sound effects will be used. I want to incorporate a wide range of sonic elements and try to use self-made/ recorded components. I have tried recording elements simply through my phone using the 'Voice Memos' app. I will eventually use a proper high-quality mic for the final recordings.

By positioning the mic in a consistent spot in the room I will be able to get a more realistic feel as the video is from the first person perspective. As the character is primarily bedridden, I can do the same in my room and record stereo audio that will already be panned to the correct direction I want the sound to be regarding the video environment.

The small condensed environment portrayed in the video is quite similar to my room allowing me to create a greater layer of authenticity to the sound usage. This will also help me get a good basis on how the atmosphere and white noise will be shaped in combination with the non-diegetic sounds.

I have also been working on the music composition as this I feel will be the most important aspect over the sound effects.

Bibliography:

Audio enhancing tool to improve clarity and remove unwanted noise

[writingquestionsanswered]

Hey there! I just came across this blog and im wondering if I could get some advice. I have a lot of trouble keeping motivation for a story. I'll have a new idea that im really excited about, ill write 10-20 pages of it, and then get bored of writing it. Any tips on how to keep myself invested in writing my own stories?

5 Reasons You Lost Interest in Your WIP, Plus Fixes!

It's not uncommon for writers to lose interest in their WIP. Staying on track, or getting back on track, are skills you'll acquire with time. Here are some of the reasons you might have lost interest in your WIP:

#1 - You're Not Sure Where the Story is Going. When you figure out a way into a story you're excited about, the beginning can be a piece of cake. It's all set up and inciting incident, which can be really really fun to write. But if you're not sure what needs to happen after the inciting incident, you can find yourself meandering and get bored quickly.

Fix - If you're writing a story that is plot-driven or a combination of plot-driven and character-driven (as most stories are these days), it may help to familiarize yourself with Basic Story Structure and also have a look at my post about How to Move a Story Forward.If you're writing a character-driven story, you can adhere to basic story structure or a more loose structure, but your character's arc will be the focus of the story. If you think plot and structure may be what's holding you back, you might spend time on my Plot & Story Structure post master list to read some of the other posts there.

#2 - Something Isn't Working. Stories are often like a house of cards in that one misplaced "card" can bring the whole thing crashing down. Sometimes you lose interest because an element or event didn't quite work, and you can feel in your gut that something's not right, so your brain interprets that as losing motivation. It's not really that you've lost interest in the story... it's that you've lost interest in the dead end path it's on.

Fix - Go back through what you’ve already written and look for something that’s not pulling its weight. It could be an unnecessary character dragging the story down, a subplot that is cluttering up the story or drawing attention away from the main plot, or it could be a scene/scenes that don’t add to the story. It could even be a combination of these things. If you can find it and fix it, your motivation may return.

#3 - You're Just Not in the Mood to Write. It could be that your interest in your WIP is just fine, you're just not in the mood to write. Our brains aren't always great at interpreting signals from our bodies, including other parts of our brain. The thirst signal is sometimes misinterpreted as hunger, which is why if you're feeling hungry when you shouldn't, you should try drinking a glass of water. Sometimes, in the same way, we're just not in the mood to write and our brains misinterpret that as a loss of interest in our WIP.

Fix - Consider what's going on in your life at the moment. Are you stressed? Are you distracted? Are you not feeling well? Sometimes you just need to give yourself a few days or weeks to let things resolve, and then you'll find your motivation has returned. Try doing things to Fill Your Creative Well in the meantime, or try some of the exercises in this post: Getting Unstuck: Motivation Beyond Mood Boards & Playlists

#4 - You're Overly Focused on Quality. One of the biggest WIP interest/motivation zappers is focusing too much on quality in your early drafts. If you're fixated on things like description, flow, theme, symbolism, grammar, etc. in your first draft, you're going to mentally

Fix - Remember, your early drafts should be more about getting the story down and working out the kinks. Don't worry so much about things like description, grammar, details, etc. until you've got all of that hammered out. And remember that the whole point of editing and revision is to polish your draft. You get the story down and make it pretty later.

#5 - You're Letting Yourself Get Distracted by New Ideas. The thrill of coming up with a new idea is part of the fun of being a writer. One of the pitfalls of being a writer is new ideas sometimes distract you from your WIP. We can be completely into our WIP, then a new idea comes along and our brains say, "Ooo! Look at the shiny pretty!" And off we go. Some writers, particularly seasoned ones, are able to work on multiple WIPs at once, but you should focus on one WIP at a time if you commonly lose interest before they're finished.

Fix - When you get a new idea, write it down in a notebook and/or in a document on your device. Once the idea is "down on paper," just forget about it. Imagine that it vanishes once it's recorded and you close the notebook/document. It takes practice, but you'll get better at ignoring the pull of a new idea.

Here are some posts from my Motivation post master list that might also help:

Guide: How to Rekindle Your Motivation to Write Feeling Unmotivated with WIP Getting Unstuck: Motivation Beyond Mood Boards & Playlists Getting Excited About Your Story Again

Have fun with your story!

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[makingspiritualityreal]

Human Design - Projector Advice

Learning deeper about the Projector Type in Human Design has been a passion of mine in the last few years, being a 5/1 Mental Projector. Human Design has been a game changer for me, the system explaining so much of the struggles, that I kept experiencing throughout my life, and ultimately validating the way I always wanted to function.

For those new to Human Design, the Projector Type operates in a way that is different from how our society is set up, feeling very easily pressured, burdened and overwhelmed, especially by traditional job settings, that are designed for highly charged energy types. A Projector is instead a very energetically open type, that doesn't generate any flow on its own, but responds to the environment it finds itself in, having only a few energetic centres left to take refuge in. Because of that, we need to be very picky about who we surround ourselves with, as negative interactions bog us down more than other types, because we absorb other people's energies. Our strength lies in sharing our impressions, stimulated by external environments.

Since I'm a Mental Projector, my stimulation comes into the form of ideas, often of a higher spiritual nature, as I directly channel from the highest center, processing it through Ajna and finally expressing it through my Throat Center through writing or speaking.

For a Mental Projector, "being in one's head" is not a bad state. In fact, it is how one should live their life, if they want to use their powers correctly. Realistically, defined centers is all that you have at your disposal to ground yourself, depending on your authority. For a Mental Projector, my authority is environmental/sounding board - I need friends or a partner to talk to in order to be able to realise my feelings, but I even like sound boarding on my own through my writing, as it helps me materialise what I'm actually thinking. While some other types may be prone to overthinking, which may go against their authority, for a Mental Projector keeping your head at the helm is a must.

The reason for this is that a projector must keep their defined centres going in order to avoid draining themselves by focusing on other centres. Let's say you live with a parent with emotional authority and your emotional center is undefined or open, them throwing their emotions at you overwhelms you, and makes you unable to clear your head, as your own emotional center begins to naturally attune to whatever they are feeling, blowing it out of proportion. As a result, they begin to unknowingly emotionally terrorize you, because you don't have anything inside you to defend yourself against their energy, and you become hypersensitive to whatever they generate. In the long run, the other party begins to blame you as a reflection of their own repressed emotions.

The only solution to this is to withdraw and spend time with the defined centers you have in your profile. Be aware, that whomever you are around, you naturally start to sense the moment you are in their presence, and realise that any impressions you get coming from the outside, beyond your defined centers are not yours.

That leads me to my key point. As a Projector, you naturally can't avoid people forever, as you are meant to guide them. But you have to have something for yourself, even if you are around others. You have to hold on to what you know is yours, so that you don't end up erasing yourself. If you're a Mental Projector like me, don't hesitate to think everything through as much as you need to. As opposed to the Sacral Center of other beings, that is meant to listen to its instinct, often acting on an impulse if that's where the authority lies, a Mental Projector doesn't have to hurry, and in fact they shouldn't.

When you are properly invited into an interaction with another, you're free to spend your time adjusting to their centers. But you need to have something that is only yours to hold onto, when you're not working with anyone, or you won't be able to find yourself anymore. The lack of external stimulation you got addicted to drives you crazy and can lead to extreme anxiety. Luckily, you can always find your way back to yourself, your way back home. For me, that home is in the flow of my ideas and my mind, based on my type. Where does the home within you reside?

[pvrpleblccd]

As the world caves in.

syposis : It was now or never. This was his only chance, never will he have another chance like this.

pairing : dreamwastaken x f.reader

tw : angst, sad, tradegy, death, mentions of death/suicide, mc going through a very rough time

~

ᴀs ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ ᴄᴀᴠᴇs ɪɴ - ᴍᴀᴛᴛ ᴍᴀʟᴛᴇs

I fell on my knees, looking at my family laying on the floor, white foam and another odd colour of a substance coming out of their mouths. My hand started to tremble as I reached out for my little siblings hand. It was cold. I couldn't help, but sob. Looking at their faces made me weak, it was pale, way too pale and far from its original tone. Their expressions will be one that will be engraved with me, they looked somehow peaceful, if it wasn't for the foam, we could mistaken for them to be asleep.

I put my palm on their cheeks, taking in their features for the last time, they're so young, way too young. They barely lived. There's so much ahead of them. They were looking forward to their lives, I was supposed to watch them grow up and see them graduate. Watch them enjoy their lives and, maybe, them eventually becoming parents.

My head suddenly turned to my parents, I looked at their faces and both of them held a small smile with dried tears clearly noticeable on their faces. My eyes glanced down on their hands, they were hold each other's hands, with their wedding rings on. Another sob came out of my mouth and hoped that they were able to move on with their next life. I felt a tiny happy feeling inside of me, my parents were divorced and they separated, but seeing them like this.. It made me feel.. somehow happy.

My tears were never ending. They kept on falling as I let out a scream. It hurt. My family is gone, without me, and soon I too will be gone. But I did not wanted to go, not yet.. Not alone. I got up and grabbed a blanket, placing it over my family. I noticed one of our gardening flowers in the living room, it was withering, but I took it and placed it on top of the blanket.

"Thank you.. For everything. I hope you were able to move on. I love you all... May we meet again."

A hiccup escaped my mouth, I quickly wiped my tears even though they kept on coming. My eyes went to the TV, the timer kept on going down and flashing, reminding me the time I had left to live the life I couldn't live at its fullest. I clenched my jaw and threw the closest thing to me on it, which was a family frame and made my way to the front door, locking it, out of habit and looked at my house I've lived it for the past 18 years.

All the good and bad memories flashing in my head, finally arriving to the conclusion even if I mostly had downs, I've enjoyed many moments of it. I was still glad to be able to live, experiencing things, even though I would have experienced more. Then the feeling of regret came to me, I shouldn't have wasted the time and moments I locked myself up in my room.

"Goodbye... My memory box."

With that, I made my way to the usual hangout of my friends and I. There was one more thing I wanted to say to someone first. The thought of them gone came across my head and my walking became jogging then running. The people in the streets were wildly insane. Some celebrating, some were trying to loot places before entering their bunkers, some were making out, some were crying. There were too many things happening, it terrified me. The sirens started to go and a mix of screaming, cheering and crying could be heard.

"I don't have much time... I need to see him... Its- AHH!"

The sound of guns could be heard, people started to shoot each other and a bunch of troubled people descended their vehicles and screamed 'We're all going to die soon, give up your life already'. That sentence caused a havoc amongst the people, bodies started to flop on the ground and blood spattered everywhere, this made me run faster. I stop dead in my tracks as I came face to face with the silent guy in my physics class who I would always bring his favourite chocolate chips cookie. My hands immediately went up as soon as I saw the crossbow he was holding.

“Nerd.”

Every step he took, made me insides hurt me even more. I would always try to cheer him up or make him smile or even get to open up, in the end I would always be the one ending up talking about how much of a wuss I am when I would always fail to get along with him again. He came up to me, his long pink hair swaying by his side, I closed my eyes and waited for the agonizing pain, but it never came, instead, I was engulfed in a warm hug. My eyes shot wide open as I returned the hug and squeezed the man.

“Thank you for being a wonderful friend to me. You made me feel things that a normal teenager should feel. What do they call it? Fireflies? No, I think it was butterflies. But too bad, it’s time to say goodbye now. I do admit, I will miss your rants.”

“Techno-“

“Dave, now go. Go to him.”

“Dave… thank you.”

I felt him give a small peck on my cheek before he turns away gracefully, I fully took note of what he was wearing, it was beautiful. He was dressed as if he was a king or even a god, his red cape flowing through the wind perfectly. I smiled and continued my course. After making turns, I finally arrived to the hangout spot, my running turned into jogging then walking, then I finally stopped, seeing his tall figure and his signature long brown coat and beanie.

"Wil-"

There he was. Comforting her, whispering things in her ear. The both of them were sitting on the bench we made, so the whole gang could fit in it. She looked up to him, her tears still falling down. I saw him lean in and she did the same thing. My breathing stopped. My head and thoughts went numb. Both of their eyes closing, lips about to touch. Before I could see the action happen, I was turned around, my face making contact with a torso and my body embraced in a hug. My sobs were silenced by the loud sirens. It hurts. He knew I liked him, he knew and now he's there kissing Niki.

My best friend.

I confessed to him, only to have him tell me he wanted space to think. Niki knew I liked him as well, hell she was the one who helped me gather my courage to go confess to him. Was I that oblivious to not notice the sudden change in Wilbur's behaviour whenever he saw Niki close or the way he talked, always harsh to me, but always soft to Niki? And the look he held in his eyes when I'm with him, nothing but boredom and annoyance and when Niki showed up, his eyes would light up and smile immediately. He would always find a way to finis the conversation quickly so that he can go talk with her.

I was blinded by what I thought was love.

"Let it out.. Let it all out y/n."

I recognized who it was just by the sound of his voice. Clay. I hugged him tighter, before my knees gave up, the both of us ending up on the ground. Never once Clay let me go. His arms were around me in a protective manner, his hand caressing my back and felt him humming something, head still on his chest.

Clay.

The one who was always been there for me when I was at my lowest and needed someone. The one who always took me out of my cave of a room when I was sad. The one who would stay up all night to play games with me. The one who helped me the most when my older sibling died. The one who would encourage me to go hang out with Nick, George and him when the others were having a chill hangout when I wasn't invited. The one who always cheered me up when I was gloomy and unwell. The one who always visited me whenever I missed a day in school.

He was the one who truly cared about my health.

The only one who truly cared about me.

I looked up to him, taking in all his features for the first time. His freckles sprayed perfectly on his face, his blonde hair was displayed in a messy way, they were wavy, reminded me of Wilbur's. His eyes were closed, eyelashes long as ever, lips looking plum and nose looking boopable. He wore a simple outfit, jeans with black converse and his signature lime green hoodie with a smiley face of it. The small breeze made his hair slightly move to the wind and made his eyes open. Those beautiful emerald green eyes.

Oh, they were the prettiest colour I've ever seen. Just looking at them, I got lost in them. They would always gave me a sort of warm and welcoming feeling. How could've I not looked at him like this before? Never once I fully took in his features. Clay, is the most beautiful man I've ever seen.

Why was I always focused on Wilbur?

When the one who truly cared for me, was always by my side?

A wave of guilt hit me, my vision becoming blurry ones again, Clay must've felt my shaking and heard my sobs once again. He looked down to me, eyes meeting each other's and a soft smile came across is beautiful face. I was no longer held in a hug, but his hands made contact with my cheeks, cupping them. He wiped away my tears with his thumb and put his forehead on mine. I found it selfish that I enjoyed this, Clay was always there for me and I wasn't able to pay his kindness.

"Clay... Why? You were always there for me, but.. I don't understand.. why?"

"It's you, y/n. It's always been you. I was head over heels for you, ever since I saw you for the first time. As we grew closer, I fell even more for you. Y/n, you're a wonderful woman, you're fucking gorgeous and you're amazing. Wilbur's a fucking asshole for not accepting you, the man fucked up and seeing you losing your smile.. It broke me. It fucking broke me. I didn't want you to lose that precious smile. You're an amazing person and you deserve the world, I.. I couldn't give you all of the things you deserve.

You went through so much and it always broke me seeing you unwell and unstable. I don't know how you do it... You're so fucking strong. After all that.. You still managed to keep a smile and be an optimist. I know that happy persona is nothing but a front, I know, trust me. — he paused for a moment, tucking a strand of loose hair behind my ear — Darling, you have no idea how lucky and happy I am to be able to see the real you. Every moment I spent with you, were the best moments in my life, Y/n."

I took in all of his words and played them in my head several times. I felt his thumb caressing my cheeks and hear him sniffle. I noticed the tears rolling down his face and this made something explode in my heart. I never saw Clay cry. Never once this man showed any sign of sadness or whatsoever before. Taking in on the fact that he was always on the one sided love destroyed me. He was making sure I was doing okay even though it meant to destroy him.

My thoughts were fighting against each other. All of the moments I have spent with Clay played in my head all over again. Remembering all of the times he would make me blush, because we would compliment me. The times were we would tease each other. The times were we would both pretend to be lovers just to be able to get 'couple discounts' and 'couple contests'. The moments I truly felt happy. And finally... The moment he would always make my heart skip a beat and give me butterflies. All of the thoughts led me to one conclusion that was written everywhere, all of the signs were there, but I was too blind actually see it...

Clay was the one I truly loved.

My eyes flickered to the object in the sky, slowly but quickly approaching us. I panicked and placed my hands on his cheeks. He looked at me in the eyes, his were red due to the crying and his expression was even more hard to take in. My breathing started to quicken, I shook my head, wanting to talk with him more, figure things out, but the object in the sky was making me stressed.

"Why..?! W..Why haven't you said anything Clay..?! I... Why only now??"

He looked up seeing the nukes coming closer and clenched his jaw. He once again faced me and pressed his lips against mine. My eyes immediately closed, suddenly forgetting about everything happening around us. Never wanting for this moment to end. When he pulled away, he pulled me back to reality. The sounds of the nukes coming was getting louder and louder. The lights started to blind my view.

"Clay.. Clay! N..No.. We can talk about this... I.. We can fix this... We can..."

Clay engulfed me in a hug, caressing me, trying to calm my horrified self. I clung onto the man whom I've realized, was the one. My cries were loud, I felt drops of water on my shoulder. He too was crying. Kissing my forehead on last time, he smile at me saying his final words.

"In another life... Maybe, it will be meant to be."

I looked at him for the last time, accepting my fate and gave him a genuine smile, for the first time.

"I love you."

unedited

published : June 20 2021, 4:40 am

modified : August 25 2021, 12:25pm

[captains-simp]

Carol Danvers ~ Two Sides Of The Same Coin

Chapter 1: Audacity

The bounty of a lifetime isn't one you're about to turn down, despite the life threatening challenges and rivals. The most irritating of which is an intergalactic superhero who becomes insistent on aiding you, whether you like it or not

Two

[ masterlist ]

Buy me a coffee ☕

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"For the hundredth time, I don't know where he is! Either buy something or go someplace else."

Fuck, another dead end.

You searched the bartender's irritated eyes for any trace of a lie, already knowing you wouldn't find any but still holding onto a glimmer of hope you would catch a trace of something.

Nothing.

What had hope ever gotten you anyway?

"Just some Asgardian ale." You muttered. You really shouldn't have been buying such an expensive drink. Not to mention wouldn't be able to have much of it due to your plans of not passing out drunk that night. But you were just as frustrated and tired as the bartender.

A break could help. You lied.

You paid the bartender and tried to ignore the harsh feeling of regret already being planted in your gut. At least the alcohol would get rid of that - before it got worse.

Taking the glass, you dragged yourself to the back of the bar towards the corner you thought you wouldn't be disturbed in. That was usually the kind of environment you had your best ideas and tactics planned. The noise stopped your mind from wandering and the low level allowed you to concentrate. Even the slight buzz of the alcohol had its advantages.

But there was no success that night.

The bartender knew nothing. He was your final lead who would corporate with you. The next person you visited would be far less welcoming.

You had known that would happen when you accepted the job. It was going to be the hardest one you ever did, and the most rewarding. You had to keep reminding yourself that.

You're going to make a lot of enemies. You warned yourself for the hundredth time that week. It was true, you would. The number of people you could trust would plummet. You would have your own hit on your head. Was that really something you were prepared for?

I already have. Nothing will change. I've prepared for this. This is the bounty of a lifetime.

You were staring into your glass when she sat down. Her blonde locks were a blur in your peripheral, a momentary distraction from the recognisable colours of her suit.

It was hard to comprehend it for a second. She had arrived so suddenly and caught you unaware. Something you weren't familiar with. It was unnerving.

You sat upright and met her studious gaze. She was watching you carefully, as though trying to get a read on you. You did the same.

You had always wondered, maybe even hoped, that you would meet her. You were in two different lines of business but it wasn't like you hadn't crossed paths with heros before. There was usually some kind of mutual understanding, even some respect. You were quick to learn there wouldn't be any of that from her - not in that bar.

"Y/l/n." Carol stated, as though the pair of you were already acquainted. But it was far from a warm greeting.

Part of you wondered if you had done something illegal in your last job. Usually things like that were never dealt with, no one had the time to be chasing around bounty hunters when they were practically always on the move (and you saved the authorities a lot of trouble).

"Danvers." You replied. Both of you maintaining your stoic expressions.

"Captain Danvers." She corrected. You didn't acknowledge that and made no effort to correct yourself, wondering if it would damage that ego you had heard so much about, so she continued. "I've heard you have some information that could be of interest." She said. You didn't like where that was going. "What do you know about Daexire?" Fuck all. "Working progress." She quipped an eyebrow at that and waited for you to elaborate. You hoped she would be quick to catch on that you weren't much of a talker and that you had no interest in letting her swoop in to take your bounty.

"Do you know where he is?" God, no.

You breathed deeply through your nose before you leant forward onto your arms and flicked the side of your glass. The sound carried between you for a brief moment.

"Do you really think I would be sat here if I did?" Carol's eyes flicked down to the liquid in your glass, took in your outfit then finally returned to your slightly narrowed eyes.

"I wouldn't be surprised." You put a lid on the anger starting to replace the regret in your guts.

You were about to assure her that wasn't what you did, that whoever had told her about you didn't know you at all. She started talking again before you could, not picking up on - or maybe just not acknowledging - the trace of annoyance that may have slipped. You blamed the alcohol for that.

"Do you know anyone who does?" You did. That was a long list you were working through. Daexire was a famous man. But he was also a feared and respected one. Both were hard to overcome.

"I don't." Had it been another bounty and another hero, you would have told them. However a bounty like it wouldn't come up again, it was what you needed to escape that life you had forced yourself into. And Carol's complete disregard of your capabilites was definetly something that was going to encourage you. Maybe your pride was a little fragile.

Carol narrowed her eyes at you for longer than you were comfortable with, because you both knew she didn't believe you. You also both knew that you wouldn't tell her anything different. Yet she persisted.

"Daexire is a powerful man. He abuses that power and will continue to do so until he's stopped." The seriousness of her voice had a small voice in the back of your head urge you to tell her what she needed to know. She was right. Daexire was powerful, and so was Carol. But you knew what you were doing too.

"So I hear." Was all you said as your eyes stayed fixed on hers.

"This is serious, y/l/n." Carol warned.

"So I hear." Her jaw clenched firmly at that. You were glad to see you had gained the upper hand in some way. It certainly encouraged you.

"You're in way over your head with Daexire." It was your turn to clench your jaw. She didn't even give you the benefit of the doubt.

"And what makes you think you're not?"

Without a word, Carol held her arm out at her side and aimed her fist at an area over your shoulder. Swirls of yellow light flowed around her fist with spikes of blue and red among it.

There was no time to admire the lightshow. A blast of energy left her fist and fired across the bar, sending everyone into panic.

Everyone ducked down to avoid the blast and it's damage but you weren't focused on them, or even the photon blast. Sure, it was a little close for comfort, but Carol wouldn't hurt you. That you were certain of.

"You want to distract Daexire with a lightshow?" You quipped, feigning disinterest. Carol was far from pleased with that.

"You're going to get yourself killed trying to capture him." She no longer held herself back, set on saying something to make you second guess your stubborness. "Just tell me who can lead me to him and it will all be over so much quicker." Carol was growing impatient and didn't try to hide it, or perhaps she was unable to. You had been taking the piss more than anyone had in a long time.

"I can handle myself and I can handle Daexire." Your confidence in your knowledge and abilities had never failed you before.

You downed the Asgardian ale in one before Carol could get another word in. Embracing the instant, electrifying burn of the alcohol, you stood up from your seat and left the bar without looking back at Captain Marvel.

* * *

"I don't know anything." He was lying through his teeth, which were currently tainted a light red from the blood in his mouth.

Just as you had guessed, your visit wasn't welcome. The moment he opened the door to you he tried to slam it in your face upon recognition, instantly attempting to flee through the back door. He had put up a fight when you caught him - a surprisingly long one - that had ended with him tired to his own chair while you looked around the house and asked him questions.

You found nothing. You knew Daexire never liked having a paper trail of his work, but you would be kicking yourself if you didn't try.

"What was the last thing you designed for him?" You asked as your eyes wondered across the mantelpiece.

The man, Owen, was renowned for his weapons. They weren't exactly your style, but you had seen enough close up demonstrations of those weapons to know they were efficient to say the least.

They were all overtly large and had a hell of a kick to them (and must be a joy to try out) not to mention the most expensive weapons on the black market. So it was no surprise there had been countless rumours that Owen had designed one or two things special for Daexire. Whether it was a spineless ass-kissing attempt, a try for an alliance or just fear of being on Daexire's bad side, you weren't sure.

"Nothing. I've never had any business with him." You didn't have to turn around to know he was lying. Having him in your peripheral was enough.

"You're not getting out of that chair until I'm satisfied with what you tell me." You said, eyeing the figurine of an old fashioned Earth car.

"I have nothing else to say." Owen scowled.

"Maybe we could have a chat instead?" You spun around at the sound of the cocky voice.

Carol met you with an arrogant smirk at the sight of your confusion, wanting to know how she had snuck up on you without you noticing...again!

You watched her in annoyance as she strolled across the room towards Owen.

"Seems like you do know people who can help, y/l/n."

"Must have slipped my mind." Not bothering to conceal the lie. Carol hummed in response and trailed her focus back to Owen.

"Daexire. Where is he?" Carol demanded in a no-bullshit tone. You watched Owen  carefully, curious to see if he was going to respond differently to the arrogant blonde, that would definetly be irritating.

"I already told that crazy bitch," he nodded in your direction, "I don't know." That wasn't a lie. He really didn't know. That didn't mean there wasn't other things he could share.

Carol clearly hadn't come to the same conclusion. In a second she had her arm raised and fired a photon blast across the room, making a prominent indent in the wall. That's getting annoying really quickly.

"He really doesn't know." You said as you leant back against the wall, your arms crossed as you watched the interaction.

"And how are you so sure?" Carol asked, completly unconvinced.

The corner of your lip twitched into a small smile. You weren't going to let Carol in on your secrets. At least not yet.

"I just do. So leave it."

"No chance." The swirls around her wrist started up again and this time Carol levelled her arm to Owen's chest. She wouldn't...would she?

Owen seemed skeptical too, willing to try his luck. "You're not going to kill me."

"Who said anything about killing? There isn't just one level to this thing, you know? It could just hurt...really badly." Carol left her implications hanging in the air as you both watched Owen fidget in his seat.

"I really don't know where he is-" Carol's fist lit up more and a soft hum emanated from it warningly. "Because no one does." He said in a rush, turning his face away. "He knows about the bounty and he doesn't trust anyone right now." Owen explained as fast as he could.

Carol glanced over at you, much to your surprise, and you nodded. He was telling the truth.

"So he's scared?" Carol asked, still holding her fist close.

"He's preparing."

"For what? Me?" You rolled your eyes and tried to ignore Carol's I'm-the-centre-of-the-universe attitude.

"For anything." That had you wondering just how many people were going after Daexire. You had assumed it would be very few. For most they wouldn't even come close and if they did it would be certain death.

"And that's all you know?" You knew it needed to be asked, but you hated that question because you were already certain of the answer. You looked up to have your thoughts confirmed. Truth.

You walked towards Owen and took a knife from your belt. He leant away for a moment but relaxed when you started cutting the ties.

Another dead end. You pondered if the knowledge that a lot of people were after Daexire would help you at some point. You knew you shouldn't let that optimism distract you.

"Thank you for your cooperation." Carol said in a mocking business woman tone.

Owen made the smart decision of not responding and rubbed his wrists as he watched the pair of you leave with another scowl.

"So where now?" Carol asked as you stepped out the door of the house with the blonde right behind you.

"Were you following me?" You accused as you took a step back to put some space between you.

"Yep." You didn't know if it was that Carol knew you would see through her lie or just that she wanted to declare that with some pride. The smug look on her face told you it was the latter.

It has been a couple days since your meeting in the bar. You would be lying if you said Carol hadn't popped up in your mind since then, wondering if you had made the right decision in brushing her off. But you really hadn't expected her to be following you.

"Well stop. This isn't happening." You motioned between the pair of you and made your way back to your ship to consider your options.

"I helped you out in there!" Carol called out as she jogged to catch up with you.

"You did fuck all." You scoffed. She didn't have a reply for that. You weren't entirely right - she did help - but you would have been fine on your own. Interrogation was something you excelled at. It wouldn't have taken you long to get those answers on your own.

"I can help." She insisted.

"Then help yourself, Danvers." Deliberately not calling her Captain.

You remotely opened the cargo door of your ship from the device around your forearm before you turned around to get another look at Carol.

"And don't follow me." You said as the door closed. She made no objections, but something told you you would be seeing the blonde hero again.

[iawv]

She Called Him Fen’Harel - Chapter 12 "Reunited“

"She Called Him Fen'Harel" on AO3 "Fear isn't so difficult to understand. After all, weren't we all frightened as children? Nothing has changed since Little Red Riding Hood faced the big bad wolf. What frightens us today is the same sort of thing that frightened us yesterday. It's just a different wolf. This fright complex is rooted in every individual." – Alfred Hitchcock

Drawing of Fal & Fen by Ithelana_Lavellan

She was at Fen's side in an instant.

"Falon, you found me," Falherna murmured, approaching the wolf. The animal lowered his head and whimpered.

Something was wrong. Very wrong.

No, no.

She knelt beside him. "What happened, Fen?" she whispered, knowing he would not answer. His fur was covered in blood.

She was holding her breath; her heart was pounding in her chest. A lump in her throat was impossible to swallow.

Breathe, she reminded herself. You can help him.

"No, please, no." Fal pleaded, eyes glued to the wolf. She whispered prayers to a god that never answered, to a creature who possibly did not care. How could she believe he is listening?

"Mana, Fen." She took a long breath as her hands investigated Fen. She checked his head, neck with trembling fingers. As she touched his leg, the wolf whimpered in pain. She took a closer look at it and found a cut, some dried blood. Shemlens' arrows caused this. She wanted to roar, claw, and sink her teeth into the flesh of those who did this.

She concentrated on breathing, on what was important.

She returned to examination, checking for other wounds. There were none. A relief washed her over; she let out a huge breath. Her body slumped, lost its stiff posture, and she sat on the ground next to Fen.

She bowed her head, perhaps Fen'Harel was listening after all.

She let out a sigh of relief, stroking his fur, calming him, calming herself.

"Solas," she whispered. Suddenly he was at her side as if he was waiting near to be called.

"I am here," she could hear the concern in his voice.

"Leg wound," she said quietly. Solas dropped to his knees by her side, ready to heal the wound, but she grabbed his arm.

"Slowly. He usually doesn't like strangers." Solas nodded, focusing on the animal.

Breath in, she heard her father's voice again. Breath out, Celia. Focus on helping him.

Focus. The keyword. The crucial lesson of her life.

Still, there was this nagging feeling of fear at the back of her mind. Fear of seeing Fen in pain, seeing him dead.

"I will hold him down so you can heal him, Solas."

The wolf put his head on her lap, allowing her to stroke his fur. She scratched him delicately, knowing how he liked it. She leaned in and whispered into the animal's ear, "This is Solas, ma falon. He will help you."

No dying. Not today.

Solas placed his hands on Fen's leg.

"Mana, falon," she whispered, stroking his fur in a slow, calming manner with her shaking fingers. She could hear her heart, the sound of flowing blood in her ears, her own hitched breath.

Breathe, she reminded herself again and again, in and out.

To find a distraction, she started to study Fen - his eyes, thick fur, teeth, ears. She loved him. He was wild, free, owned by no one, like her.

He was a companion, a partner, a friend, her only connection to reality. Her anchor. He was one of the reasons she was living.

Fal startled at the first tingling warmth of Solas' magic. She could feel it on her skin, his aura reaching her own. The mark on her palm brightened a little, just for a second.

Solas’ hands stopped glowing. "He will be fine, and I stopped the bleeding. Still, I need to immobilize his leg," he stated, reaching for his backpack.

"He is not afraid of you." The statement escaped her lips, and she couldn't hide her surprise. She looked at the elf in the darkness.

He stared at the wolf. "He is not."

She patted Fen's head, staring into his eyes. The wolf poked her with his nose and licked her hand. Falherna laughed softly.

"He loves you," Solas said.

"Obviously," she chuckled, her fingers stroking the soft fur.

She watched Solas as he lowered his gaze, his face drawn tight with concern.

"I love him too," she whispered, more to herself than to him. Solas paused, his eyes meeting hers for the briefest of moments before quickly returning to his task.

"Done," he said after a while, bandaging Fen's paw.

"Ma serannas," Falherna thanked him.

He smiled tightly, but when he met her gaze, something in his eyes softened. "It is no trouble."

Falherna helped Fen stand up. The animal tested his leg, sniffing it, raising and lowering it. He made a few steps towards Fal, who laughed again and patted his head. "You'll be fine."

Solas moved back to the distance.

***

The feeling of Fen’s head and nose beside her cheek was a warm, calm sensation she missed. She looked at the fire, her fingers tucked deeply in his fur, sliding slowly along his jaw and ear. It was comforting to feel his muscles again, his strength, the certainty she is no longer alone.

She hugged him and whispered to his ear, "Soon it will be over. We are getting out of here, ma Fen."

She sighed and laid down on her bedroll. For the first time since the hole in the sky opened, it took her only a brief moment to fall asleep.

***

Solas sat quietly. The fire almost died out; he sent a small fireball at it.

Rubbing the base of his palm against his eyes, he tried to gather his thoughts. He would rest as best he could, but he suspected that his dreams would offer no release.

It happened again; the mark gave him access to Herald's state of mind. The world went blank as his fingers made contact with hers. This time he could see things, but all were fragmented. Images. Emotions. Sensations.

His eyes settled on Herald for a moment, observing her marked hand.

The anchor shouldn't cause this - the strange connection between the barer's mind and him. He never experienced anything like this before.

It was no mind-reading, no telepathy, nothing similar to it.

He sighed; there was no way to test it without engaging Herald in it, and the thought was both exciting and disturbing.

Whatever this incredible power was, Herald did not know about it and consequently did not have any control over it.

He looked away from Herald with a sense of relief. He didn't want to fail at his assumptions - it irritated him. And he didn't want to develop an interest in her hidden thoughts or feelings.

Not worth the effort to uncover them.

***

The sky was beginning to blush into the evening, turning violet and gold.

Falherna followed the winding road, refreshed by the cold air whipping across her face, raising gooseflesh along her arms. The closer they got to Haven, the calmer she was. There was no way this could work, but she had prepared an alternative solution.

She tucked her hair into a ponytail and scratched Fen behind his ear. He strolled by her side, looking at her from time to time.

Solas and Varric stayed a few steps behind, their attempts at interacting with her unsuccessful.

The conversation with anyone did not interest her at the moment.

She had things to consider to make it work. She was not going to separate herself from Fen.

The world already took her freedom, locking her in one place with unwanted magic in her palm.

She pinched the bridge of her nose as her head started to pound. She was tired, so were Solas and Varric, probably. They found a small clearing less than halfway back to Haven.

"We can camp here," she suggested slowing her steps.

"Good idea, Brighteyes, also I need to talk to you," she was expecting it. Varric would not let this go. She just nodded.

While Varric and Solas lighted the fire and prepared their bedrolls, she placed both hands on either side of the Fen's head and lifted it to look into his eyes. He met her gaze solemnly and let out a soft whine.

“We're going to figure this out. Ara dir'vhen'an,” she said with a reassuring smile, pressing a kiss to his nose's bridge.

The wolf buried its head in her chest. She smiled, closing her eyes and absorbing the noises of the approaching night.

Her neck began to stiffen and tense, a tingling sensation spread on her skin, a feeling of someone else’s gaze. She didn't know how, but she was sure it was Solas, observing her.

The rising sun had burned most of the mist away. The wind whispered across the long grass and rustled the leaves of the trees lining the dirt road, the gentle sounds of the countryside drowning out the noise of the bustling village. She studied the wildflowers and rocks as they continued climbing up the bridge.

"You know they won't let Fen cross gates of Haven," he heard Varric's words as he got back from relieving himself.

The Herald was humming thoughtfully, her hand never leaving Fen's head. She turned her head to meet his eyes. For an instant, Solas felt caught. Underprepared.

"Not immediately," she muttered, taking a sip of water; a single line appeared between her eyebrows for a second, then her features smoothed out, and emotion fled her gaze.

Solas laid on the bedroll behind the Herald's back and listened to the exchanged. Varric was not wrong humans would not let the woman - even Herald of Andraste - walk among them with the wolf at her side.

"So, you've got a plan, Fal?" Varric leaned in, grinning conspiratorially.

"Always," her answer simple as usual. She quickly changed the subject, talking about someone who they both knew.

Through half-closed eyelids, Solas observed the jewelry in her hair. There were still those odd metallic beads braided in, a claw at the end of one.

She moved her head, and he frowned. Was that a wolf head on one of her braids?

It matters not, if that's a wolf head or something else, he thought.

He closed his eyes, steading his breath. The Herald laughed, and his eyes opened.

Fen turned his head, meeting Solas' gaze.

The wolf watched him as close as Solas, himself, was watching the Herald.

***

Cassandra stood with her arms crossed staring at Fen, face tense, unease in her eyes.

Falherna clasped her hands behind her back, waiting patiently. At the corner of her eye, she could see gawkers - some curious, some visibly scared of the wolf by her side.

"What's the meaning of this?" snapped Cassandra.

"Seeker...," Varric murmured.

"Let's wait for advisors," Falherna cut in, "I saw you sent for them."

The Seeker looked at her surprised before she shook her head.

"Fine."

Tension settled over them as they waited. Falherna could sense Seeker's anger seething just below the surface.

"What in the Maker's name happened?" they heard Cullen's voice shortly before joining them. Behind him walked Leliana with Josephine, who trying to keep up while pulling her second hand into a coat sleeve.

"Herald?" Cullen's eyes widened when his gaze rested on the wolf. He looked at Falherna, waiting for the explanation.

She did not plan to answer yet. She preferred to remain silent until everyone saw the situation they were in.

Solas stepped closer and now stood beside Fen.

"Oh my!" Josephine covered her mouth, eyeing the wolf.

Leliana kept herself quiet; however, she couldn't hide the smirk on her face.

Cassandra sent Falherna a frustrated glance.

"I will ask again - what's the meaning of this?" her tone icy.

"This is Fen, the wolf I told you about," she explained and held her silence for a beat. "Before you start accusing me of dragging here a dangerous beast, I would like to propose a compromise."

Falherna sighted discreetly, waiting for the flow of words to end.

Humans. They would never disappoint. Were their mind so broken they couldn't recognize what compromise meant?

Her hand automatically found Fen's head, while her fingers stroke the fur.

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see how Solas' gaze kept darting over to her face.

"Herald, I've heard something about a compromise?" the corner of her mouth twitched at Leliana's voice.

She looked at Cullen, Cassandra, and Josephine, who stood in front of her with their confused expressions, and she felt so tired. Tired of the words she did not say yet, of the fights she did not experience yet, of explanations they did not ask of her yet, of the role she did not want, of the fate waiting for her.

"Yes. For the sake of everyone, Fen and I will stay in the Taigen's shack north of Haven," she paused, her blue eyes suddenly sharp, "If you want me to stay, of course."

Her face was so set as to be carved from stone. They regarded each other, both her and Seeker, motionless.

Cullen was the first to interrupt the silence. He took a step towards Fal, and Fen did the same, snarling quietly.

"He doesn't seem to like you, Curly," Varric laughed.

Commander Cullen sent him a brief look, focusing on the Herald.

"We want you to stay, Herald. Without you, we are doomed," he assured her.

Falherna dug her hand into Fen's fur, calming the animal.

"Thank you," she answered, merely looking at the Commander.

"Herald, forgive me for asking but do you ever lose control?" he asked, and immediately his hand gripped the back of his neck.

"In certain specific situations, yes," her tone reserved, eyes studying his body language. He seemed embarrassed. He regretted opening his mouth, obviously.

Luckily Leliana decided to intervene once again.

"If we are done here, I would like to talk to you, Herald. There is a message delivered today," she quickly got straight to the point, bowing her head slightly as if she was trying to hide a little smirk on her face.

"I will gladly talk to you, but I would like to clean up first if you allow."

"You are the Herald, my Lady," her arms tensed when she heard Cullen.

"I am no one's Lady, Commander," she answered with weariness. She was exhausted; her mind and body screamed for rest.

"I will meet you in the war room in an hour." Leliana smiled at her, and the four of them left towards the gate.

She stood there with her hand on Fen's head, feeling eyes on her. Too many eyes - of soldiers, people of Haven, kids, her companions.

"Do you have murderous thoughts, Brighteyes?" Varric joined her.

She said nothing.

With a corner of her eye, she saw Varric's gaze. He was worried about her.

"Do not trouble yourself, Storyteller. Go and rest." she sent him a faint smile, "I will see you later.".

She had never felt so alone as she did standing in the midst of this small village. There was no one to talk to. No one who could understand, comfort her.

She heard the sound of voices and turned to look behind her. The gawkers were slowly scattering. Some were still there, pointing at Fen and whispering to each other.

She moved towards the shack with Fen by her side.

***

Varric sighed loudly, "Fuck."

Solas looked at him with a raised eyebrow, and the dwarf shook his head as if he wanted to get rid of some persistent thought.

"Fate is a weird thing, Chuckles," he murmured.

"Is it?"

"She is forced to stay amongst humans which she disklike, to put it mildly. She is trapped here. I worry," dwarf seemed to be speaking to himself, but Solas listened carefully.

"You worry because you think the Herald does not have enough strength to endure?" he asked not only out of curiosity. The fact was he wanted to know if she was a flight risk.

Varric snorted "Nah, Chuckles, I do not worry about lack of strength. She has it more than enough.".

Solas frowned trying to make some sense of it while Varric continued. He caught a glimpse of red hair before Herald and her wolf disappeared behind the trees. He wondered how long humans will allow her to stay outside of Haven.

"You know what a cage can do to free man? Imagine having no space to call your own, no choice over who to be with, what to eat, or where to go. Day after day threat and suspicion everywhere," Varric sighed while they passed the main gate.

"I can imagine, Master Thetras," Solas murmured, "I would assume Herald can adapt."

"She is confined to this kind of environment so has no option but to change and adapt," the dwarf face took a grim expression.

"What worries you then?"

"The change. The chronic loss of free choice, lack of privacy, daily stigma. To be honest this constant mask of invulnerability and emotional flatness is the most disturbing factor. I struggle with it since I know her," a small laugh escaped his mouth, "Asked her about it many times but she always dismissed me with silence or stoicism bullshit theory."

They stopped by the fire to warm their fingers. Varric invited him to sit as he handed him a bowl of water. Solas considered it for a moment but refused, waiting impatiently to get back to his cottage. The conversion, while very interesting, took too long already.

"She is not alone. We are all here to support her." he declared however without conviction.

Varric sat silently for a while and Solas was ready to leave when the dwarf looked at him and smiled.

"Yeah, maybe. Maybe the presence of Fen will help or perhaps Faron would be a better solution for her troubles." the dwarf scratched his chin.

Don't ask. It is none of your business.

The question burnt in his mind but eventually never left his mouth. He bowed lightly leaving Varric alone.

[lovelywingsart]

Apologies (mild 18+)

-- Karl Heisenberg X OC (AFAB, She/They) --

The 'part 2' to the small 'trilogy' of stories! The 'part 1' to this is Irritation. :D (I can't really say when 'part 3' will be posted, but of course it'll be added into the Masterlist when it is!)

There's still alot going on for me IRL, but I finally managed to do this... :'D I'm sorry if more entries take a while to upload...!

-----

*Warning?: Small regrets, aggressive speech, teasing, mild 18+ themes near end

Summary: Emelia doesn't really regret much, but seeing Karl's reaction to her words makes her hunt him down to apologize. But will he accept it? And how?

It felt like hours had passed, and Emelia finally made her way back up to the higher levels of the factory once her work was complete. Her words had been stinging her brain, and she felt worse and worse as time went by. She purposely avoided certain routes and hallways to prevent any more potential Soldat run-ins while thinking. Would HE even want to see HER?? She wouldn't have blamed him if he didn't... Hell, for all she knew, she could be killed as soon as she walked in the room when she found him. And that was IF she could find him... Where he chose to hide away was always a mystery to her until she actualy found him. She had learned that the hard way after multiple 'family meetings'; the thought made her physically cringe.

She kept her eye open and focused, listening for anything that could have clued her in on his whereabouts. Humming, pacing, swearing or muttering in rough German, even scraps and pieces being thrown in aggravation. But, save for the noises of the factory, there was nothing. Silence, so to speak. Even as she took the elevator floor to floor. Even as she looked in any door she could find on the way up. Even as she searched through every hallways, eventually risking finding the Soldats in order to find him. This apology thing was truly eating at her mind, and she couldn't stand it... But she couldn't leave it alone.

It took her much longer to look for the man than it took a full working 'shift', she thought, enough so to where she almost decided to give up. She was tired... She was exhausted. She was exhausted, and despite her initial irritation having lessened, a new irritation had flared. An irritation with herself, primarily. A desire to see him at least once before she managed to lay herself down to have yet another restless sleep. To apologize despite never having a reason to do so before. But the longer she searched, the more she wanted to just... stop. It had never taken her THIS long to find him... but perhaps she deserved it. She let out a sigh as she hit the elevator to the highest floor, making her way through the halls once more in a last attempt to find him. But alas, there was... nothing.

Thoughts clouded her mind as she finally made her way towards the small, personal workshop he had, going through her usual routine of climbing the pipes and slipping through the grate in the floor without being detected by the worst of the Soldats. Sure, there were definitely easier ways to get up to that level, but this was what she was used to. No, he wasn't here, either... Now she REALLY had no idea where he was. With a heavy sigh, she made her way to a hidden door on the other side of the workshop, pausing only to glance at the primary table. It looked as if he had been making... something. But small bits of recently crushed metal made her wince, and it wasn't until she caught sight of a small gear that she moved again, slowly nearing the table itself. It was the gear he had taken from the mould before she opened her mouth. She gingerly picked it up, noticing it not even touched by his powers. She could feel it... Metal moved by him had a certain... energy to it. It wasn't something she had started to notice until recently. The gear she held didn't possess this energy, and it made her feel even more guilty. Just how pissed was he to not even use the Cadou???

She took a breath before stuffing it in the pocket of her tied jumpsuit, hearing the small *clink* as it hit the other one she had pulled after he left. Why did she take them...? She didn't know... It was a mindless decision that she knew wouldn't have much of an impact.

Distant sounds of machinery could be heard as she finally made her way through the door, her footsteps silent as she made her way to the room she occasionally occupied when she wasn't in the factory itself. It wasn't HER room per-say, more like a resting place if needed. She reached up to take her hair out of the small tie and run her hand through it before opening the door with a sigh, only to freeze as she entered the room. She was met with Heisenberg on the 'bed', laying on his back with his arms behind his head, his eyes closed and his legs crossed. His jacket and button-up shirt were thrown across a chair, leaving him in the dark tank top he wore underneath. She watched his muscles tense as the door opened, his jaw tightening somewhat as she held her breath. A wave of nervousness flooded over her as she stood in the doorway, not unsure if she should even move.

"... Ah..." she tried, almost afraid to speak. "... H-Hey..."

She gulped as she was simply met with an acknowledging grunt. He said nothing... He didn't even look at her. She stood for a moment before holding her breath and slowly entering the room, mentally bracing herself for any kind of impact. But... nothing came. Even as she hesitantly made her way to the desk, jumping slightly as she heard the door close naturally behind her. She tore her eye away from him, instead focusing on the desk itself, looking over notes he had written. Or... lack thereof... The paper on top was filled with obvious, angry eraser marks over random words that had been written so many times that the paper itself was imprinted with them. Other miscellaneous papers were crumpled or bent, indicating frustration. There was silence until she spoke again.

"... Production ran smoothly..." she said quietly, only to flinch as she heard movement. She looked at him to see as he slowly sat up.

"Good." He said simply, lacking any sort of interest.

Emelia felt a twist in her gut as he moved to stand, his movements somewhat stiff as she heard soft clicking from his left leg once he stood. It was then that she knew, her words had hit him harder than she thought. It sounded as if the leg was going to give out on the poor man as he walked despite knowing it wasn't, nearly brushing past her on his way to the door. It sent an unpleasant shiver down her spine. She held her breath, the twisting in her stomach not leaving.

"H-Hey..." she tried, her voice soft as she spoke over her shoulder. She heard the flick of a lighter before she smelled the sweet scent of the cigar.

"What." His voice was low as he glanced back at her. She couldn't face him... His eyes dug into her shoulders. It was an admittedly cold feeling... She didn't like it.

"Shouldn't... Shouldn't you... Relax a bit...?" She offered, trying to sound as hopeful as she could despite the feeling. She looked at him as she heard him move again.

"I already did." He replied, mere inches away from the door, itself. She couldn't help as she felt the smallest bit of panic.

"W-wait-"

"I have work to do, Emelia." He growled, reaching for the handle. It was then that she turned around fully, her face that of regret.

"Karl, please...!" She said, her voice nearly begging. He seemed to pause, his head turning slightly towards her. He said nothing, the smoke from the cigar flowing through his nose as if he were an enraged bull. But she kept her eye on him, her own jaw tightening as she took a breath.

"I... I'm..." she started, reaching to rub her arm slightly. He didn't move. "I'm sorry..."

Silence filled the room once more as Heisenberg stared at her, his hand hovering over the door handle. She then took a breath, opening her mouth to speak once more.

"I... I really am..." she sighed, looking down. "I just... I wanted to be alone... Those damned Soldats haven't granted me any peace all week, the bloody Lycans have been running me ragged outside of the factory, and I've been so damned angry and I just... I wasn't thinking, and..." she paused, taking a breath before looking back up at him and sighing. "No, I... There's... there's no excuse. I shouldn't have said anything... I'm sorry, Karl... I'm so sorry."

Silence.

More silence.

'Please say SOMETHING...' she thought, watching as he finally looked at her. She couldn't tell WHAT he was thinking behind the shades he wore... It worried her. Her breath halted as he slowly moved his hand away from the door, turning his body to face her entirely, his movements slow.

"You really think I can forgive you just like that?" He asked quietly, his shaded gaze burrowing into her skull. Smoke came out of his mouth with each word. She nearly shrank back, lowering her own gaze to the floor.

"No..." she answered, shaking her head. "I wasn't expecting you to..."

"And what's stopping me from leaving this room, or even crushing you?"

"Nothing."

Her answer was immediate, and she glanced up at him to see him left his chin. He seemed to think for a few moments, his gaze flicking around her form. But to her surprise, he relaxed.

"The gears you have are defects." He said simply, nodding to her hip. What?? She stared at him, now incredibly confused.

"What...?" She asked, unintentionally backing away and leaning against the table as he walked to her. He stopped in front of her, raising a brow at the confused- and now nervous- look she gave him.

"The gears in your pocket. They're defects. Check around the edges." He repeated, holding out his hand. The gears... She reached down to pat her side, feeling the pieces of metal against her leg as they made a small noise from the movement.

Oh.

She reached into her pocket and pulled both of them out. She looked over each one for a moment, frowning as she saw what he meant. There were holes... Not the usual holes, of course, and not where she'd notice immediately unless she had closely inspected each one beforehand. They were along the insides of the gear edges, nearly going through the metal itself. There were multiple holes in each gear, indicating odd air bubbles when the metal had set. In other words, anything they were used in would have ended badly. That must have been why he had taken the one in the first place... She then groaned, thinking back to the amount of them she had made.

"Damn it..." she growled, only to jump as Heisenberg nudged her hand with his.

"The others are fine, if that's what you're worried about." He said casually, nodding to his hand. "That also means you took one off my work table."

Emelia looked at him before giving a sigh, carefully setting one of the gears in his palm.

"Sorry..." she said quietly, her eye moving to his hand as he inspected the gear he was given. "I just thought-"

"Thought you could fix a mistake with a broken gear?" He asked, watching her face. She hesitated.

".... maybe... I just... didn't know how." she admitted, looking at her own. She was quiet for a moment. "You didn't touch it with your powers, I thought maybe it could be used for something..." she mumbled.

Her words seemed to make him perk up somewhat with a newfound interest.

"I didn't what?" He asked. She froze.

"... You... you didn't use your Cadou...?" She repeated carefully, looking up at him.

"How can you tell?"

How COULD she tell??? She knew it was a recent thing, but...

"It... I don't know, it's... It's hard to explain." She managed, reaching for the one In his hand and gingerly taking it as he opened his palm for her. "There's... almost an energy to the things you've used your Cadou on, if that makes sense... Almost like a small... fuzzy electric coating... Sort of."

"And when did you realize this?" He asked, legitimately curious as he blew out more smoke. She stopped, her eye widening slightly.

Of course she knew when. Or, at least what she assumed started it. 'The first time you touched me like that', she thought, her cheeks going slightly red at the thought. The metals in her own body had felt different since then, setting off a small change in feeling to every metal around them daily.

"Since we... uhm..." she mumbled, her eye moving between the gears as she pushed them together slightly. She flinched as Heisenberg gave a soft chuckle, knowing exactly what she had meant. It was an interesting development, he thought, as well as a highly amusing one.

"I guess that makes sense." He said, a light smirk crossing his features.

"... It does?" She asked quietly, only to jump as he took a step closer and leaned forward, setting his hands on the edges of the table beside her and effectively rendering her unable to move. She could feel his body heat once more, though was slightly more concerned about the cigar that was ever so close to her face despite him being careful to not let the burning embers close to her skin. She clutched the small gears to her chest, watching as he studied her face.

"Back to the original topic..." he started, noticing as her cheeks reddened just slightly. "There might be a way I can forgive you."

Emelia stared at him with a wide eye, watching as he backed away enough to take the cigar from his mouth without it touching her.

"... there is...?" She asked quietly, watching the smoke curl into the air as he nodded and spoke.

"Yup." He said, gesturing to her hands. "Find something to do with those gears. Something that WON'T destroy my factory, preferably."

She paused.

"That's it...?" She managed, utterly confused. He shrugged.

"For now."

He held out his hand to offer the cigar to her. There was a moment of silence as she stood still, only moving as he gestured to it. She hesitantly reached up and took the object from his fingers, nodding her thanks before slowly putting it between her own lips. He removed his glasses before nodding to her hand.

"Think you can do that for me?" He asked, watching as she exhaled smoke from between her teeth with a nod.

"Of course." She replied, almost too eagerly for her taste. But she meant it... Something in her mind told her she wanted to appease him in any way possible now. She didn't know WHAT she'd use them for, or how long it would take, but she'd find a way.

More smoke came from her mouth as she took another drag, handing it back to him carefully. He took it back, but simply kept his position in front of her and gave a hum.

"Maybe one or two more things." He said suddenly, the smallest smirk forming as more nervousness filled her face.

"What...?" She asked, moving to set the gears on the table next to her, only to jump with a surprised noise as he suddenly leaned forward and nearly crushed his mouth to hers.

The kiss was somewhat rough, a decent amount of aggression behind it as she was pushed backwards against the table and nearly losing her balance. Her hands few back to brace herself against the table as not to fall backwards, just barely managing to keep very balance. small shiver ran down her spine as she returned it, and another came as he let out an angry growl.

"Sit." He grumbled against her lips. She let out a confused whine as he gripped the table behind her, and she thought he'd toss the thing with her on it. The small cogs clattered to the floor as he suddenly swiped everything away from the edge of the table while keeping her against him.

"I said SIT." He growled louder, earning a surprised yelp as he suddenly grabbed her hips. His fingers dug into her sides as he lifted her and shoved her on to the table, feeling her hands fly up to hold onto his shoulders in attempts to balance herself once more. He didn't let up, another growl leaving his throat as he sent a rippling pulse through the piercings in her body.

Emelia let out a squealing whine at the feeling, though was kept locked to him as he wrapped an arm tightly around her waist. Her back arched into his chest with the pulses of electricity, attempting to hide the muffled whines that escaped her throat. But they only encouraged him. He felt her nervous hands travel to hold his jaw, her fingers trembling. Not with fear, however, very obviously proven as she welcomed the kiss and touches with every movement he made. She gasped into the kiss as he suddenly tugged her forward, pressing his hips to hers. Her thighs tightened slightly around his sides as the pulses grew in power, and she was suddenly molded to him and soaking up every bit of warmth he gave.

"Not used to it and you already want more, yeah?" He said, pulling away from her enough to speak, yet still close enough for his lips to brush hers with every word. He could see her face, taking pride in the redness of her cheeks and the near begging glint in her eye.

She was silent, only slightly nodding with a single, embarrassed whine as her thighs trembled against him. Heisenberg chuckled, the tone dark a he smirked almost evilly.

"Didn't think you were so eager." He started, leaning down to press rough kisses and bites against her neck, marking the skin almost immediately. A chill ran down her spine as her breaths came in light pants while he bit up to her jaw, her hands gripping his shirt straps.

"You pissed me off, Emelia. I don't take that shit lightly." He growled lowly, his lips nearly against her ear. He tugged her shirt from its tucked position, enjoying as she nearly melted into putty in his hands. He continued. "You pissed me off, so here's what's gonna happen. I'm going to do whatever the hell I want with you and to you." He stated, moving one hand up to brush his fingers along her neck as he allowed the pulses to cease for the moment. He felt her breath hitch as he pressed his fingers just below her jaw, feeling her pulse quicken. "You're gonna do what I say and you're not gonna say a god damn word about it. Do you understand?"

Emelia felt another large shiver down her spine at his words, feeling his palm rest against her neck as she swallowed nervously. Sure, they made her just she smallest bit scared. But it was also... exciting? It sent her mind into a frenzy, and she legitimately wasn't sure if she should have been afraid or aroused. Either way, she nodded almost immediately, taking as deep a breath as she could without making any other sudden movements. He grinned with an evil chuckle.

"Good girl." He grumbled, leaning to bite down on her neck once more before backing away fully, chuckling at the quiet whine of protest he received in response as his hand left her throat. Emelia froze for a moment once she realized his warmth had left her, covering her face in near embarrassment with her legs almost immediately closing together as he adjusted his shirt.

"For now, you're gonna wait." He said simply, standing up straight as she looked up at him with disbelief. How could he just-

"H-Hey...!" She started, only stopping as he reached forward and grabbed under her jaw, pressing his fingers to her cheeks and yanking her forward just slightly.

"Shut up and stay here, Doll." He purred, watching as she squirmed slightly on the desk. "Relax yourself, you're gonna need it-" he then paused, only to smirk, "- Or make yourself worse for me. This is the last choice you get until I come back."

Emelia gave another whimper, gulping as he shoved her back against the table before letting go.

"What are YOU doing...??" She asked, unable to hide the slight pout in her voice. Oh god, what in the hell WAS this?! What was she reduced to? POUTING?!

"I've got some work to do. Now stay in this room." Heisenberg chuckled, finally retreating back to the door. "It'll be worse for you if you leave. Trust me, I'll know."

She opened her mouth to speak, only to get cut off as he left the room almost too quickly. But even then, her voice was caught in her throat once the door clicked shut. How... How did he...

She finally pushed herself off the table with a shaky breath, nearly feeling her knees collapse under her from the warm feeling between her legs. It was a feeling she knew she had to get used to despite knowing what it was... While it usually irritated her, this time it filled her with a near excited anxiousness. It took a few moments to regain her composure, finally managing to walk with shaky muscles. She made her way to the 'bed', nearly flopping down on it with her legs hanging over the side as she got lost in thought. He didn't SEEM incredibly pissed anymore... Granted, he wasn't happy either.

Her hands covered her face, rubbing it slightly.. It COULDN'T have entirely been a way to 'forgive', could it...?? If so, what were his plans when he got back? She had no idea how fully experimental he was... Hell, she didn't know what SHE could do. The idea of him using her was terrifying and admittedly arousing at the same time, but she couldn't help but relax just slightly. At least he forgave her... Or, he would. Partially. That fact put her mind at ease somewhat, knowing that going out of her way to find him afterward to apologize wasn't all for naught. But for the time being, she let her mind wander to what he could possibly do. Or maybe she shouldn't... She barely knew what to expect from the subject alone much less from him, especially when he was upset. He pushed her hard enough without the aspect of sex, but now... She really didn't know what to expect.

Oh well... It would be fine.

Maybe.