#polyfragmentation

[ridingthewavesinspace]

When I go to a DID specialist and they actually believe in DID and believe my experience without me having to fight for my experience to be believed

[digital-pawprints]

We aren't polyfragmented, but we know systems that are, and ended up making this sticker for one polyfrag system in particular a while back. It didn't even occur to us to post it here until someone on Discord asked about the full size version!

Feel free to use this in your own small servers or whatever, as long as you don't try to take credit for it.

[tales-from-systok]

I once saw a video that claim that all the polyfrag systems in the app or in internet in general are fakers, but not because they thought that polyfragmentation wasn't real, no... It was because of the ineternet

This person was claiming "REAL polyfragmented systems are too busy trying to survive to be on internet, a real polyfrag system won't have time to be on internet, they're too busy surviving, so stop faking being polyfragmented because you're not, if you're on internet that means you're not that traumatized and aren't surviving the same thing as a REAL polyfrag system"

DUDE WTF WAS THAT CLAIM 💀??

HELP WHAT THE ABLEISM IS WILD WITH THAT ONE

[multiplicity-positivity]

Here’s some positivity for HC-DID systems!

Highly complex DID, or programmed DID, is a colloquially coined label for systems who have faced programming in some way as an aspect of their trauma history. This form of DID can occur as a result of ritual abuse, organized abuse, and/or mind control, and can leave systems with purposefully formed alters, polyfragmentation, complex internal structures and splitting patterns, and more. HC-DID systems are important members of our community, and deserve to be shown kindness and positivity and treated with respect! Here’s to all the HC-DID systems out there!

🌱 Shoutout to those who are questioning if their system is complex or highly complex in some way!

🌺 Shoutout to HC-DID systems who cannot remember any of their trauma or effectively manage triggers!

🌿 Shoutout to systems with programmed alters who are working to understand how being programmed has impacted their life!

🌼 Shoutout to HC-DID systems who are unable or unwilling to learn about programming at all!

🪴 Shoutout to HC-DID systems who learned about their highly complex nature through therapy or some other form of recovery!

💐 Shoutout to HC-DID systems whose alters have highly specific or specialized roles!

☘️ Shoutout to HC-DID systems with clusters, side systems, or subsystems that are difficult for them to interact with or understand!

🌹 Shoutout to polyfragmented HC-DID systems with a very high alter or fragment count!

🍃 Shoutout to HC-DID systems who have no fully formed or developed headmates, with all alters or parts having a predefined program, role, or purpose!

🌷 Shoutout to those in HC-DID systems who are afraid of their own systems or who are scared of interacting with certain parts, alters, or memories!

🌾 Shoutout to those who wish it was easier to talk about and try to understand their own experiences as HC-DID systems in plural spaces!

To any HC-DID system who sees this, we want to let you know that we see you, we care about you, and we want to support and uplift you however we can! Your voice matters, your system matters, and we are so very proud of all that you have accomplished. Know that just by taking it day by day and trying to live your best life, you have achieved so much, and you deserve recognition and celebration!

We genuinely hope that you can find peace, rest, comfort, recovery, and self-acceptance in your future. Know that no matter how much or little you know about your system, you are real, your trauma was real, and you are deserving of respect, kindness, and understanding today and every day! We are wishing the very best for you and your system, and are rooting for you in all that you do. Thank you so much for reading, and have a wonderful day!

[hc-did-culture-is]

(not a culture ask)

Can you be polyfragmented without having gone through programming? I don’t think I ever did but my system has a lot of fragments and when we split it typically causes a lot of fragments that show up later or never at all, but I don’t think I was ever programmed, and I don’t want to say I’m polyfrag if that’s programmed only

(/gq)

You can absolutely be polyfrag without being programmed, you're all good on that front!

[our-inspire-verse]

Splitting every 2 fucking (we're gonna ignore that i typoed Ducking.this is irrelevant kms) seconds in the most obvious and fucking annoying ways god Damn it fucking thats enOUGH ENOUGH OBVIOUS FICTIVES. STOP DOING THAT THING. THE FUCKING. THING.

[mischiefmanifold]

so my system has a subsystem, does that mean we’re polyfragmented? i’ve never heard the term before and really curious!

hello! subsystems do not necessarily mean you're polyfragmented, it's more like meeting several of the common characteristics makes it more likely that you are. you can have subsystems without being polyfragmented, and you can be polyfragmented without having subsystems.

[chaosdisorganized]

I hate splitting. I've been feeling like shit lately and my brain is like "ooo I know what will fix that!" And it splits, which leads me to feel even more like shit. I cried 3 times yesterday, I didn't sleep well, my head is killing me and there's parts in my brain that just formed and are trying to sort themselves out and I feel blurry and weird. Idk who I am anymore these days. One new split is awfully rude and irritable and was really mean to our boyfriend yesterday and I just feel like an awful person.

[ridingthewavesinspace]

Me when severe dissociative disorder is actually severe and I have to go to the hospital :(

[multiplicity-positivity]

Hello! I sent in an ask a while ago about fragments and communication (since the fragments have little-to-no consciousness). I just wanted to say that I have a psychiatrist now who has a lot of experience with dissociation. I gave her something I wrote about my experiences. She very much liked the part where all the fragments hug. Had to stop reading and tell me that. And she encouraged more such interactions. I've talked with therapists before about this stuff but none of them have known much about dissociation so I haven't had this kind of encouragement. I just wanted to share this since it makes me happy 💖

Oh goodness, this was so wonderful to read! Thanks for sending in an update - we hope things continue to go well with your system and your new psychiatrist in the future! <3

[thestarseersystem]

yes!!!! we have a few of those! Like Pan and Alyce, Pan is from different sources all together, although with similar traits, and Alyce is a combination of all alice in wonderland sources!!! Like Alice Liddel from Alice Madness Returns and Alice Kingsleigh from Alice in Wonderland (2010). We also have subsystem alters and fragments that act similarly to a multi-source introject alter.

Let's Talk Multi-Source Introjects!

Introjects can take many, many forms since it's simply the act of taking traits from a pre-existing character when your brain is forming a new part!

Sometimes the traits are even taken from different characters! Your brain might find it usual to take one trait from a character and then take another from a completely different character - leading to your new part being an introject of two sources!!! And it doesn't just stop at two, it can be however many your brain finds necessary!!

I want to introduce you to two of our parts Chax and Eileen who are both introjects from multiple sources.

Chax is an introject of Blitzø from Helluva Boss and Darwin from The Amazing World of Gumball. He has introjected Blitzø's recklessness and carefree attitude as well as introjected Darwin's optimism. The brain thought those two traits would be beneficial to the system, so here he is!

Eileen however is a little different, instead of being introjected from two completely different characters she is introjected from Nozomi Tojo and Eli Ayase from Love Live School Idol Project. Eileen is basically if those two characters had a child together, she has Nozomi's playful attitude while keeping Eli's sternness. Eileen is one of our caretakers in the system so having those two dynamics is very beneficial to her role as caretaker.

Introjects really can be anything at all! If you ever see someone with something in their system you don't understand you should ask them about it instead of judging! I'm sure they'd love to explain it 🩷

[miss-mossball]

subsystem in a subsystem

[ridingthewavesinspace]

Immediately forgetting pretty much all of a relationship, good and bad after a breakup.

[ozzyfromthecafeteria]

something that is so so frustrating about dealing with and healing from trauma is the way we’ve slid back to performing the same habits and responses every time a situation or emotion that is entirely unfamiliar to us arises. wraps the brain up with a soft blanket shh shh you don’t have to fawn anymore it’s fine it���s so fine it would blow your mind how fine everything is.

[multiplicity-positivity]

Hello - it's John again, anon who asked about the blackout stuff

I had another question and an update

We did find the alter, and she is a new split, and is a trauma holder, I didn't know it at the time I had sent the ask but one of our abusers tried to contact us (went looking in our notesapp history and messages) which caused a switch & total blackout, we've had a few more since then since things have been stressful but she is trying to communicate, just harder with very bad aphantasia and dissociative barriers. Haven't had therapy in a few weeks and we're in quarantine this week, but have therapy again this upcoming Thursday so we will talk about it then but the therapist doesn't know the full extent of us being a system other than knowing that we are and that most likely was trauma that formed us,but we are gonna try to talk about it more, so you have any advice on bringing it up?

And onto my question before - is there dissociative disorders other than DID? We have a lot of alters (like 1000+) and most of them are fragments and some fully fleshed, but we all still tend to be somewhat similar, I think maybe it's a safety thing so it wouldn't be noticed, and I thought did always had very different alters, we tend to be more similar than not even though there are quite a few exceptions, but we have horrible memory sharing, I usually retain some level of "done something but idk what exactly" but we lose a LOT of memories and feel detached to ones that we do remember like they aren't "mine" per se just that "I" was there for it, in addition I never ever switch out I'm *always* here unless something very big happens that throws everything into disarray, it sort of makes me feel not valid because we don't have control over switching and I can't ever leave even if others can come in and out of the fronting area, I think/know that I do have a dissociative disorder of some kind because it is very impactful and impairing my symptoms, but I guess don't feel valid sometimes because I also like being a system sometimes other than the memory and dissociation

-john

Hey John, we’re probably getting to this too late to share advice for talking to your therapist - we hope that they were understanding and everything went well! We’re sorry if our absence here made it more difficult for you to talk to your therapist about what’s been going on in your system.

As for your second question, there are a few other dissociative disorders besides DID. There is OSDD (other specified dissociative disorder), P-DID (partial dissociative identity disorder) and DPDR (depersonalization/derealization disorder). However, it’s possible for systems with DID to have hundreds or thousands of alters, if not more! Systems with this many alters may have polyfragmented DID, although polyfragmentation has just as much to do with a system’s complex structure as much as having a high alter count.

We are not polyfragmented, so we can’t provide much in terms of advice or personal experience when it comes to understanding polyfragmentation. Any polyfragmented system who sees this is more than welcome to weigh in with experience, resources, or advice!

When it comes to not feeling valid, we’d like to offer some words of encouragement that might help y’all, if that’s okay.

First off, it’s very normal to not have control over switching, especially for systems who haven’t been able to make much progress either internally or through therapy! Our own system has been improving when it comes to managing switches, but we still don’t have full control over who fronts and when. Not being able to control switches doesn’t mean your system is invalid, and we can assure you, lots of systems out there function in that way!

Also, it’s not as rare as you might think for systems to have frontstuck members… even for many folks with dissociative disorders like DID. Our host is usually fronting to some extent (albeit often quite dissociated). And there are plenty other systems with frontstuck members too!

Finally, it’s okay to like being plural or part of a system, even if you have a dissociative disorder. Yes, it can often be impairing, difficult, painful, and overwhelming… but it can also be comforting, joyous, fun, or exciting! We have a complicated relationship with our plurality, but most of us love being a system and we wouldn’t trade our plurality for anything in the world! Having a mental illness or disorder doesn’t mean you have to be suffering all the time, and finding joy and happiness in our disorders can help make living with them so much easier!

Good luck out there, John. We hope things go well for you and your system in the future!

[petrichorvoices]

so. polyfragmentation, huh.