#polyfragmented did

[omnium-gatherums]

What they don't tell you about DID is that almost everything is just vibes. Literally just vibes. System mapping, inner world, knowledge about alters in general - vibes.

[pplatonic]

about a cofront today

[zeros-sys]

reminder that you don't exactly need more trauma to split alters

the brain forms alters as it needs, if there is something that the system cannot handle or there is a gap in who is filling their needs then an alter can be split

every alter exists for a reason, even if it seems like there is none

(this doubly applies to polyfrag and autistic systems)

[mentallystrawberry]

when you’re under a ton of stress then start to notice your memory worsen, your headaches becoming more frequent, and communication going nonexistent…

[polyfragcultureis]

polyfrag culture is: oh we just have osdd1b because low amnesia and less blatant switches!!

2 years later: there's an alter whose role in the system is to be constantly co-front and passively providing information so that we can at least maintain a facade of continuity 😅

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[plague-hybrid]

Autistic polyfrag culture is really just the same cycle over and over

> Get a new hyperfixation (or rediscover an old one)

> Go through any sort of stress

> Congratulations, you now have at least 2 new introjects to greet to the party

[sovereignsystem]

Do NOT try to find out more info about your system hierarchy. You WILL come back with more questions than answers 😓

🛋 - (he/kek/o7/fxck)

[plurapony]

hehehehe!!!! to those who play bang dream gbp and project sekai i would like to share my dissociative identity disorder character headcanons 🩷🫶🏻

Project Sekai: Mafuyu Asahina

WHY HEADCANON: Mafuyu is a character that is INCREDIBLY relatable to our experience with DID. Her entire story arc is to "find her real self" and shes shown to deal with extreme amnesia (ie not recognizing her childhood self) also the abuse she suffers is something that very much resonates with us as it's similar to what we experienced.

Bang Dream! GBP: PAREO

WHY HEADCANON: PAREO has two defined personalities, Reona Nyubara and PAREO. "When she is PAREO, she speaks in third person. However, when she is Reona, she speaks in first person using the pronoun "watashi." As PAREO, she speaks in a polite manner, ending a lot of her sentences with "-masu" or "-desu", and as Reona she utilizes the casual Japanese form. " - from the Wikia. I feel that the way she acts especially contrasting between two extremes, very much resonates with DID.

Bang Dream! GBP: Soyo Nagasaki

WHY HEADCANON: Recently I read the Colours Blended with Raindrops event story and there was a particular scene with Tomori and Soyo that felt very DID-esque. I'll include the transcript below

Tomori: The Soyo-chan who does everything as to not burden her mom... and the Soyo-chan who played cards with us... Today, I felt like I met two different Soyo-chans. Both of them are Soyo-chan. There are so many different versions of Soyo-chan. I like that. There are many different versions of you inside yourself. They overlap and become various colors... That's what it feels like to be a human being. I like that kind of Soyo-chan.

Soyo: ... If so many different colors overlap... I'm sure the colors would end up being very murky.

- Tomori: Today, I met many different versions of Soyo-chan. The Soyo-chan who loves her mom, the Soyo-chan who is good at playing cards... The Soyo-chan who hates rainy days. They're all versions of Soyo-chan I've met for the first time. ... No, I feel like I've known Soyo-chan who hates rainy days for a long time.

Soyo: (I'm sure Tomori-chan remembers that day too...)

Tomori: You said earlier that you like beautiful colors. I'm sure every version of Soyo-chan has clear and beautiful colors. So I don't think they'll become murky even when mixed together.

I feel it is very very DID coded, highly doubt it was intentional but it means a lot to me!!!!

Yippee!!! Do you play these games? Do you agree with these headcanons? Or do you headcanon different characters!!!!

[aetherial-boy]

being chronically dissociated isn’t the most talked about DID symptom but it’s a complete nightmare to live with and i hate it so much.

i’m rarely fully grounded, i always feel like the smallest trigger is gonna send me back to not knowing who i am again. i’m on autopilot a lot, just going through the motions of life, not truly living it. i spend most of my time feeling at least partially out of it and people make a lot of assumptions based on that. it’s also exhausting, and it puts me in… situations. these range from ‘i wasn’t focused on being grounded and didn’t notice the queue moved’ to ‘my younger sibling stopped me walking into traffic because i wasn’t able to ground myself enough to be aware of my surroundings outside’

[sysboxes]

[Text: This system is currently questioning if they’re polyfragmented, please be patient with them.]

[Text: This system is currently questioning if they’re complex, please be patient with them.]

Like/Reblog if you save or use please ^^

[systematic-breakdown]

The Shadow That's Under the Door

I sit and stare, hands clasped in prayer My butt has a dent in the floor I know there's something out there The shadow that's under the door

The carpet curls beneath my hands I lean just a little bit forward I swear it's breathing like a man The shadow that's under the door

Was it always in that spot? Had it moved before? Should I mark it? So I thought The shadow that's under the door

Just a moment, just to see It won't take long, I swore By my bedside, I retrieved A crayon from my drawer

It only took a second Maybe a second more But when I turned My stomach churned The shadow not under the door

I checked along the cracks I checked the wooded gore I checked each inch of space to find The shadow that's under the door

It's gone! It's gone! It's gone! I cry At last I'm free! No more! Oh, but what a fool was I For I had not checked the other side And there - Behold! The shadow lie Just beyond my line of sight I dare not sleep, he comes at night And we both know I cannot fight The shadow that's under the door

[mentallystrawberry]

Shout out to the other chronically mentally ill systems who’s disorders and traumas have severely impacted your quality of life and functioning

shout out to polyfragmented or complex and highly complex did systems

shout out to the systems who are RAMCOA survivors, childhood sexual abuse survivors, or childhood torture survivors

shout out to systems diagnosed with other comorbid mental disorders

shout out specifically to systems with BPD🫂

shout out to systems who have lost relationships with people because of your mental health

shout out to the systems struggling with substance abuse issues or addiction

shout out to the systems who’ve been in and out of mental hospitals

shout out to fellow black systems and other poc systems with many intersecting marginalized identities

shout out to systems who can’t attend in real life school or are graduating late due to their mental health

shout out to the systems who can’t get a job or a drivers license

shout out to the systems who lost their childhood and teenage years due to constant mental health struggles

shout out to systems who have to take multiple medications for their disorders

shout out to the lonely systems who can hardly ever leave their homes and build friendships

shout out to the systems that struggle with the scars their sh addictions leave

shout out to systems who can’t take care of themselves without needing support

try to keep in mind that you are not the average persons, so we shouldn’t expect ourselves to be able to function just like the average person would. know you are all loved and are trying your best to navigate a society that wasn’t designed with poc and disabled or neurodivergent people in mind. i wish you systems the bestest recovery possible and i’m sending much love and support.

[polyfragcultureis]

Questioning polyfrag culture is only keeping track of the most prominent and common alters and completely disregarding the fragments and fuzzy forms because if you tried to do a full headcount and define your system structure you would actually not be able to Function™

.

[narcissisticpdcultureis]

npd + cdid culture is "i dont remember you. u must not be important" when you have dissociative amnesia regarding people

.

[xenodelic]

An attempt to describe emotions with polyfragmented DID

Big disclaimer up top that this is just our experience, and we can only speak for ourselves. We were motivated to write this based on a conversation we had with a loved one, trying to explain how we experience strong emotions as a polyfragmented DID system.

This revolves mainly around the existence of emotional fragments, and the structures they take on within our system. Keep in mind, any plural person can have fragments, but having complex structures of many fragmented parts is, of course, a key feature of polyfragmentation.

1.) Trigger

Cue any sort of emotional trigger. Fragments can either split right in that very moment, or already existing ones can be brought up by the trigger. Typically several will appear at a time, each embodying a different reaction to the trigger.

2.) "Hijacking"

This is perhaps a bit of a loaded word, but this is what it feels like for us once the fragments start to front. Whoever else is fronting will typically still be there, but their reactions and behaviors will be heavily influenced by the fragments. Our mindset will very suddenly change, and we'll be thinking through the lens of whatever emotion or memory that fragment embodies.

3.) Dissociative Barriers

We can be experiencing very obvious signs of acute distress - i.e., blood pressure and heart rate increase, flushed skin, dizziness, headache, etc. But still be completely unaware that we're in distress. This is because even when the fragment is hijacking, it is still separated by a "wall" of dissociation. We often cannot perceive that its there, or identity the actual emotion associated with it, because of this dissociation.

(This was the part our loved one was most shocked by - because we had expressed before that we can be distressed and not realize it, but they had no idea why or how that worked!)

At best, we realize that there is something wrong, but severely struggle to identify what emotions are actually there. Attempting to identify the emotion can result in strong resistance, as we have parts that specifically exist to stop us from identifying other parts.

4.) Rapid sequence

Depending on the trigger, there will usually be several fragments that come up in succession. This can often be a pre-determined sequence that is tailored to the specific trigger. So for example, they may come up in the order of anxiety > fear > lashing out > self loathing > depression. After the sequence is finished, we are often "reset" to a neutral state.

We can experience a severe trauma trigger, play out a sequence of intense emotions, and return to a neutral within the span of 10-20 minutes (its not always that short, but it usually lasts a maximum of a couple hours for us). The pattern of the sequence is typically very predictable, sometimes even methodical.

5.) Emotional Amnesia

After all is said and done, the fragments more or less disappear. Within just a few minutes, we might not even recall that we were in distress. Often times we remember that something was wrong, but won't be able to recall the details or identify what emotions we were experiencing at all.

-

We hope this makes some sense, and that folks can conceptualize what we're trying to describe. Its a very complex process that we're only just recently being able to unravel. We spent the first 20+ years of our life thinking this was entirely normal and that's just how everyone experiences emotions.

Anyone, particularly other polyfrag systems, are welcome to add to this post with their experiences. We hope maybe this will resonate with some folks and help give a way to describe their experiences. This was an exercise of self-expression for us, so any sort of feedback is welcome!

[actuallyverynormalbtw]

that dissociative glitch when your brain mashes Your Conciousness with Another Alter's Behavior.

feeling like the most specific frankenblur in the world