#pro end all endos

[redcherryrain]

Im not pro endo Im pro end all endos

[sick-as-a-dog]

anyeays if anyone is keeping up with me defending my sustem on the bs accusations that some proendo asshat keeps makong up about us, this is my warning to NOT hareass him or anything. just block, maybe report (tho knowing tumblr staff theres no point in trying), and move on. please.

[the-alarm-system]

How Anti Endos made me in denial even longer, and how Pro Endos made me Accept it

When I was younger, I always had Red at my side. Red is my protector, he always has been. I didn’t understand him, I didn’t understand his existence. I’d hear about DID, I met people with DID, but to me Red didn’t match what they have felt. I would tell people that I had another person in my head, someone who may allude to DID but I’d affirm that it was not DID. It was something else to me, something I didn’t know for sure. At some point I thought that Red was given to me by the Gods. He would deny this but it’s what made sense to me.

I was in anti endo circles, I still saw myself as a singlet and my system friends were very anti endo. I thought it was just the right non-harmful sides, I didn’t know the actual arguments. I just thought that’s how it was supposed to be because DID hasn’t made sense to me yet. I was a “singlet” who didn’t understand why there was another with me. anti endos circled around r/fdc and I didn’t want to accept that I may have a headmate because I didn’t want to be a dirty faker like they all hated. I didn’t want to be harmful towards my friends

One time I saw this pro endo term, it was about a system granted by deities. This made me think, but I ended up just blocking them because no endos are bad right?

then I saw an anti endo argue that schitzogenic is dangerous and thoughts in someone’s head was stupid and fake and just hallucinations. I thought “but between you and them, what is the difference in the idea that they have someone in their head too?”

then I found the term plural, it was inclusive, it made sense to me. But I stayed in denial

then scald appeared, he was loud, he would front a lot, he wouldn’t just appear when I was in danger like red did. I decided to take the term plural, I didn’t call myself a system yet, at the time plural is what made sense. I felt like I didn’t have the right to “appropriate” the did struggle. I was plural, I was many. Then finally at some point

I realized I could have DID, my headmates were sourced from trauma. Things started to connect, I stopped denying it. I had to the way Scald would be. Anti endos held me back, pro endos saved me. I owe them everything.

[yumeka-sxf]

Seems like today's new chapter is hinting at another new arc - the final exam arc maybe?!

I still think Endo is planning something special for chapter 100 that may be connected to this arc. Regardless, it's nice for the whole "Anya's good at classical languages" subplot to be highlighted here...so curious if it'll end up being important.

I was cracking up at Anya's whole "snotaconda" joke 🤣 She's such a kid, and Loid is so done.

This is now the third chapter that the Authens have consistently appeared in since their introduction (except for the short mission of course). It's really making me think that they're going to be important for something, if not in this arc then later on.

Like many others, I'm on the fence as to whether they can be trusted or not. They've been portrayed only favorably since they've appeared, having several sweet moments with Anya. Plus, Sigmund is shown to not have his wits about him a lot of the time, which would be very detrimental to someone who's tactically trying to deceive others - unless his whole "senile old man" thing is just an act! If anything, he could have some connection to Anya's past, since he has so many books on classical languages...but he was a professor after all...so many mysteries!

Tiny Twiyor crumb of Yor being embarrassed talking about Loid. She doesn't seem to get embarrassed when she praises him in front of others when he's not there, like with Becky, but if he is there...yeah 😅

There was a lot of wordplay in this chapter that I think the translator did a good job conveying. In the above scene, Sigmund says he's "a pro at exposing secrets," so Anya mistakes the word "pro" for "furo" (bath).

In this scene, she mistakes Sigmund's "eureka" for "yuukari" (eucalyptus).

And here, instead of "booger constrictor" she says "hanaconda," a combination of "hana" (nose) and "anaconda."

This is actually the first chapter that Loid has played a significant role in since the end of the Mole Hunt arc. Since that ended with a big character development chapter for him, I'm curious to see how much he's changed, even subtly. In this chapter we can see that he's even more hesitant to interact with Yuri, which makes sense.

Also, Sigmund opens his eyes to a new way of acquiring knowledge he had never thought of before outside of his cold, calculating spy training. In addition, we see Sigmund being openly affectionate with Anya, patting her on the head and even hugging her when she says that she strives for world peace.

Again, nothing so far has portrayed him as anything but good-intentioned, perhaps as a way for Loid to eventually learn to be affectionate with Anya too. But that doesn't mean Sigmund isn't hiding something, even if it's not malevolent.

Loid's line here towards the end of the chapter was particularly ominious.

Ugh, so many mysterious and potential plot twists! In addition to a cliffhanger, the chapter ending gave us cursed facial hair Anya 🤣

Two weeks to see if she passed or failed! 😳

[sysmedsaresexist]

I spoke with Colin Ross again.

The original post, for those who missed it.

This is going to be really disjointed and rough. I've been put in a really weird position and I want to just... talk about it. This is okay to reblog, I'm sure there's pro/endos that have been waiting for this. Unfortunately, it's going to be attached to a vent.

Sadly, talking to him brought up a lot of bad feelings. I'm still so sad to see so many people turn on me. I'm disappointed that there was so much pushback. I'm disgusted by people's hypocrisy.

People wanted to know why I wasn't posting my side of the emails to Colin Ross, they tried to say he didn't believe those things anymore.

So I emailed him again, recapping our previous conversations, and asking him if he still believed in non traumagenic plurality.

And he responded that he does.

I thought I could post it, and that would be the end of it. Proving we had spoken before, confirming the topics discussed. But in my email to him, I shared what I've been doing since I last spoke with him, what prompted me to reach out to him again. The same thing that stopped me from posting my side of the emails originally. I wasn't entirely honest with him, either. I don't think I would have gotten a response if I had talked about tumblr.

And I'm simultaneously so excited and so scared.

This is a man that, in a very vague sense, formed a mentor/professional relationship with me. Our interaction overall was brief, but it was exciting to discuss his work with him, ask him questions that had been bothering me-- I told him about myself, my educational and work background. I used my real email and name. My real school. He's Canadian, we talked about it. I shared real details of my life, and while it wasn't necessarily in confidence, I don't think he would appreciate knowing that I've shared his personal thoughts and emails on tumblr, of all places. I'm not lying or hiding anything in my side of the conversation.

I'm scared.

I'm terrified to post anything that could be linked to me. Even posting this, I'm like, "can people like... reverse edit my picture and get my email?" I genuinely don't know.

I worry about posting the full screenshots with his email, knowing people won't believe me if I don't, but not wanting to have these ridiculously immature people in his inbox. I have encouraged people since day one to find his email themselves and reach out. I figure that the only people who would put in that work are the people who genuinely want to learn.

But then I realized that there are people that could ruin the relationship I made with him.

People that could make it so that I can never contact him in this way again.

People could use this to find me, if they get Colin Ross talking. (The rational part of my brain says he's smart enough not to give someone else my name, but goddamn, some of you people are actually dangerous)

There are people that want to do that to me. People that hate that I even brought a professional into this conversation. And I get it. I sat on the original conversation for almost three years, remember?

It's really scary to admit you're wrong, that you've been close-minded and hardheaded. It's scary to confront your bias and actions.

But having him respond to me... I feel so lucky? Not that Colin Ross is a saint, but how often do you get to meet someone like him? How often do you have a chance to take advantage of a professional contact that seems willing and happy to have these kinds of conversations with you? Three years later and he remembered me. He took the time to answer me, again.

I don't want to fuck that up.

So I thought about reaching out to certain people, showing them the entire set of emails without any blockout and having them vouch for the authenticity.

Then I realized that I wouldn't trust any of you anti endogenic systems with any of my information after how you've all behaved.

And I realized that none of you are going to change your minds, no matter what I show you, and I'd rather to maintain my professional relationships than put any more effort into any of you.

And I know if I wait too long to post this, people will call it fake, so I either need to go ahead and make this post or just kind of let it disappear into obscurity.

It's so important, though.

Isn't it?

I can't tell anymore.

[stage-system]

Headmate Verbality Coining Post

[pt: Headmate Verbality Coining Post /end pt]

Bodily nonverbal systems have stated that nonverbal is a term exclusive to those who are bodily unable to speak at all times. As such, these exist now.

Nonvocal - a headmate who is never able to speak regardless of the body's verbality

Semivocal - a headmate who is only able to speak a little regardless of the body's verbality

Demivocal - a headmate who is only able to speak some regardless of the body's verbality

Vocal - a headmate who is able to speak a "normal amount" regardless of the body's verbality

Hypervocal - a headmate who speaks more than most people regardless of the body's verbality

Vocalflux - a headmate whose ability to speak changes regardless of the body's verbality

I don't care who uses these, just know they were made by a pro-endo! :D

[micia-posts-stuff]

Spoilers for Spy x Family chapter 96

(Part 2) Now let's talk about the dance and the thing.

Damian blushing hard is always funny and adorable, look at him! The poor boy doesn't know what to do with all these feelings! Also it's interesting that we get yet another instant of Anya shivering when she perceives his feelings towards her. We saw it happen first very early on, in the chapter where she had to apologize for punching him, and we saw it recently in chapter 88 when they were in Henderson's office. It's a recurring thing at this point, wich makes me think she'll understand what it is in the future, not any time soon, but for now she still perceives that something is there.

This is so cute, the boy is having a whole flashback to them holding hands (there is also the light novel but it's not included in the events of the manga sadly). He was so nervous of being so near her and holding hands, he wants to dance with her but he's also totally panicked, so precious!!!

Yesss goofy dancing!

THIS PANEL ALSO KILLED ME. I'm double dead!

Look at his expression!!!!! The little smile when he thinks of Anya's family! The yearning for something similar and the hint of sadness because he knows he can't have it. SOMEONE GIVE THIS KID A HUG. HE'S SO SAD. And the way he opens up to her! Like tell me they're not friends! Tell me he would say that to anyone! You can't! This closeness they have, even tho it's unconventional, it's so important to him. This is very similar to the scene after the bus hijacking. Anya has officially been established as someone he opens up to. Even though he still thinks Anya is after his family (and he's right), he also understand there is something different from other people. And even after he denies what he just said telling her "he totally wins because he learned from a pro" Anya understands he was being sincere before and that was just a way to cover up how he really feels. And it would have been sooo easy for Endo to just make her be angry at that comment, but he didn't and I'm so happy, because this moment is very important. Because it's an honest moment between them, where they really open up to each other, wich bring us to...

Listen. Being a Damianya shipper, I was obviously looking forward to this chapter. But no amount of hype could have prepared me for THIS. I'd never have imagined we would get one of THE reveals, but I'm totally here for it. First of all I KNEW IT WAS GONNA BE HIM YESSSS

Second the fact that happened not only during their dance BUT DURING THE CASQUÈ, chef kiss, straight out of of fanon, amazing, incredibile, show-stopping. (Also on a two pages panel!!!!!)

Third and most important, the fact that it happened. As people pointed out this doesn't help Anya's mission in the slightest, in fact it puts it in danger. Anya has tried to hide this secret from anyone. But NOW she tells HIM. This is not a high stake moment, a moment where she confesses out of necessity. No, she tells him now because she saw he was being honest with her, because he was showing her his feelings, because he really touched her. And she told HIM because she knows he would be able to understand her, because she saw through his facade. She has been starting to see how similar they are a while ago, but it was highlighted particularly during the bus hijacking. Not only, as underlined in the quiz, they both love their fathers and are doing everything to impress them and for them to love them, but she also can relate to his loneliness, because of her life before the Forger family. When he said "your family...sounds nice" She saw in him the same thing she felt back then. That's why she decided to tell him, because she knows he won't reject her, like she's afraid other people would. And in these months she was also able to see his true self underneath the facade and yes they always end up fighting, but she is clever enough to recognize his sincerity when it really matters. She has learned to know him and decided to trust him with her biggest secret.

And Damian obviously doesn't believe her ahah. I mean I don't think anyone was expecting otherwise, it's only logical. BUT a couple of things. First of all the first expression he made, he maybe didn't believed her after thinking it over, but for a moment the thought was there, the suspicion has definitely been planted in his head. Second, this wasn't just a slip-up by Anya, it may have come out naturally in the moment, but she definitely ment to tell him. If it was a slip-up she could have easily played along with Damian and say something like "yeah I was joking, it was a line from my cartoons" But no she doubled down! She got angry that he didn't believed her and called her dummy, she definitely wants him to know! This is important because from now on she can act with the notion that she told Damian. Like if she needs him to know that someone thought about something, she can tell him! Even if he doesn't believe it, she told him already so it's just a matter of having him trust her. I don't know if she'll try to convince him or if something will come up later where they'll need to work together using her mind reading abilities, but I hope he'll believe her sooner rather than later because it would be so interesting! Imagine all the shenanigans they can go through together if he knows of her mind reading abilities! Imagine the struggle of hiding his crush once Damian finally admits his feelings to himself! It would be such a cool dynamic! I do understand Spy x family has the tendency to always return to the status quo and that's fine, it's a slow burn, but now something major has ctually happened! It would be kinda lame for this massive thing to change nothing about the story and be swept under the rug. Like it's fine if some little moments don't change things too much but this is THE MIND POWERS REVEAL! It needs to have an impact.

Now I'm really interested in seeing their povs. I want to see if Anya will regret telling him, since she was so worried that people might discover her powers. Maybe this could finally lead into Anya's backstory. And I really really want Damian's pov, because as soon as we see him seriously thinking about it he will have to realize it's true. He already had his suspicions and there are not many other explanations about the knowledge Anya has. Plus if he doesn't realize it now based on the past, he'll have to realize it in the future when Anya relies a bit too much on her powers, wich is something that happens fairly often. Like if something like old maid happens again, there's no way he won't think about what she told him.

And last but not least

Endo usually uses these little boxes to show us the actual progress of the mission. He has put friendship to ??? before, so he could have left it ambiguous if he wanted to, but he didn't. He confirmed this was an important progress in their friendship, despite Damian not believing her and them arguing at the end. Wich makes me a bit more hopeful that something will come from this.

[anti-endo-haven]

Hi, I’m still on break but I wanted to say some stuff so others know.

I support anyone that uses mspec labels, it’s not on me to say you are right or wrong for how you identity. I’m in full support of the people that use “contradictory terms.” You be you.

I also cannot say if you’re wrong or right for an alter using a trans label that doesn’t fit with the body. An example of something that might be me flamed is the body was afab, we all collectively refer to ourselves as man or trans man or transmasc. Briar tends to have times where she identifies as tfem. And it helps her feel more in tune with her identity. So we don’t judge.

The only thing I don’t support is radqueers, endos, endo supporters, pro contact paraphiles, and other things I’ll add to later.

I cannot and will not tell you how you can or can’t identify. That’s not my place and you deserve to be able to question labels until something works with you.

If anyone doesn’t like this, feel free to do as you please.

At the end of the day, the way you identify isn’t hurting me or my life outside of the internet so I don’t see an issue with it. And I refuse to hurt someone for the way they identify. That’s not for me to do.

[pluralcultureis]

Out of curiousity, could you explain why you don't support endogenic systems? I am new to learning about all of this plurality stuff and don't really understand why people do not support them and attack them?

Endogenics claim to be systems without trauma, which isn't possible

Systems are formed from early and repetitive childhood trauma typically before the age of 12 at the oldest

Endos claiming to exist without trauma not only invalidates what we had to go through to end up with this disorder, but it also leads to a lot of newly discovered systems thinking they're endogenic and not trying to look deeper into the trauma they've been protected from with this disorder. Which keeps them from healing

We were neutral on endos for a long time, but we were also constantly harassed by them for being neutral and not pro, and that with the amount of research we were doing just made us unable to support them

[miasmaghoul]

Take Your Licks

Rating: E

Pairing: Swiss/Rain

Word Count: ~3.4k

Contains: stoned ghouls, Rain's hardcore oral fixation, lots of tongue kissin', oral, first time rimming, Rain being a pillow princess and Swiss being just fine with that

Summary: Swiss has something new in mind, and Rain isn't sure how to feel about it. He figures it out quick.

A little somethin' for our beloved @endopyre, whose ghoul designs give me heart eyes. Happy birth(yester)day Endo, I hope you like it!

On a chilly fall night, there's nowhere Rain would rather be than right here.

Kicked back on the couch with a belly full of Mountain's spiced cider, his head resting on Swiss's lap while wind rattles the ancient windows and the tv drones on. Everyone else has gone to bed, it's long past midnight, but Rain doesn't feel inclined to retire quite yet. Not while Swiss is massaging his scalp with one hand and feeding him the end of a joint with the other.

They'll get there eventually, though - he can feel Swiss's bulge slowly growing against the back of his neck. Rain chuckles as best he can with the press of Swiss's fingers against his lips, and the other ghoul shoots him a comfortably stoned grin.

"Feelin' good, starfish?" Rain hums through his exhale, offering his own dopey smile as Swiss chases his smoke, biting the air.

"Not as good as you, apparently," Rain teases, the slightest bit slurred. The seated ghoul raises an eyebrow and Rain turns his head, nuzzling his cheek against Swiss's zipper with a pointed look. Swiss snorts, gives a rude roll of his hips, and Rain purrs.

"Listen to you," Swiss coos, ruffling Rain's hair and dropping the burnt end of the joint into his empty water glass. "So noisy over my cock and I haven't even given it to you yet." Rain replies with a nip to the fabric of his fly and Swiss gives him a wink. "When did you become such a slut, huh?"

Rain chitters low in his throat, a pleased sound. His own semi twitches against the seam of his sweatpants, but the dark fabric hides the movement.

"'s that a complaint?" He drags his tongue over the place Swiss's shaft sits, saliva darkening the denim, and Swiss tilts his head.

"Nah," he says, dragging callused fingers along the pointed shell of Rain's ear. "Just surprised it happened so quick."

Honestly, so is Rain. It's only been about six weeks since his summoning, but he's certainly made the rounds.

Aether had been his first, an accidental thing borne of extreme need; a reaction to a full moon that had risen a mere six nights after his arrival on Earth. It had worked him into a frenzy, body and mind stuck at fever pitch, and Aether had been the first one at his door. An encounter filled with overwhelm, fear and a lack of control Rain truly couldn't wrap his head around.

He'd barely had a chance to explore this new body on his own, let alone with someone else while in the throes of the moon's influence. Aether had been as kind and gentle as he could, but Rain couldn't help his panicked reactions. He'd spent hours in Aether's arms once the gnawing need in his guts had dissipated, sobbing into his chest and shaking like a leaf while the other ghoul soothed him.

Something about it, though, had been intoxicating. Once the mental stress had settled, a new ache had flooded his body. Something deep and insistent, focused between his thighs, and the next morning he'd woken Aether up demanding they do it all over again.

He's given everyone a test drive since then, so to speak. They all have their plusses and minuses, their pros and cons.

Save for Swiss.

There's something to be said for every part of Swiss.

The shine of his golden eyes. The strong, angular cut of his jaw and the scratchy salt-and-pepper of his short beard. The breadth of his back and shoulders. The muscular but soft plane of his chest and stomach, all dusted in a delightful layer of very grabbable hair. The sheer size of his hands, of his fingers, and the expert way they move. The curve of his ass, the thickness of his thighs. The way his fat cock hangs between them, the way it flushes so dark when it gets hard.

All of Swiss is immaculate, really. But as far as Rain is concerned, nothing beats his mouth.

(Seriously, it's ranked number one in his little black notebook. The one that lives in his nightstand, right alongside the lube and a handful of vanilla flavored condoms. They're Dew's favorite.)

Rain stares at it while he laves at rough denim, at the plushness of Swiss's lower lip and the way his mouth curls up at the corner. It's open just enough that Rain catches glimpses of fang every few breaths. (Those are nice too, wonderful when dragged over his pulse point and sunk into the meat of his thighs.) Swiss's tongue pokes between them every now and again while Rain laps at his rapidly thickening length, and every time Rain spies that flash of pink his rhythm falters.

Swiss, ever observant, doesn't miss it.

Rain's eyes track every bit of the way Swiss drags his tongue along his bottom lip, entranced by the shine it leaves behind. It's like he's moving in slow motion, dragging it out, but maybe that's just the weed. Impossible to say. Either way, Rain's own tongue has gone useless in his mouth, lolling out the side of his mouth. He's drooling onto Swiss's crotch, but neither of them seem to care.

"You're staring," Swiss murmurs, gently flicking Rain's ear. "'s my tongue really that interesting?"

He knows the answer, but a reminder never hurts.

"Uh huh," he gurgles, pulling back his own tongue and unsubtly palming himself through his sweats. Swiss doesn't miss that either, and Rain shivers a bit at the way his lids go visibly heavier. "Since I know what it can do."

Swiss grins with all his teeth, his eyes flash with mischief, and Rain's stomach does an anticipatory flip.

"Speaking of," Swiss rumbles, relaxing back into the couch, "there's a certain tongue-related activity I've had in mind for you for a while now." A large hand comes to rest on his stomach and Rain groans when it slips beneath his t-shirt, warm against his skin. "You up for somethin' new, tadpole?"

Rain's head feels delightfully hollow. He isn't sure he's heard half of Swiss's words, the pressure behind his eyes stealing his focus, but the drag of rough fingertips along his waistband helps to ground him. His eyes follow Swiss's tongue once again, currently swiping over his fangs.

"Mmm," he hums with a nod, "sure, but can we do something I want first?"

"What would that be?"

"Gimme that fuckin' tongue," Rain demands, reaching up to grab the other ghoul by the back of the neck. Swiss's smile widens, and he doesn't fight when Rain drags him into a lazy, filthy kiss.

He refuses to let Swiss's tongue leave his mouth - licking at it, sucking it, giving it sharp little nips that tinge the kiss with copper. Distantly, Rain feels himself being moved, lifted, but he really can't be bothered to open his eyes and see what's happening. He's far too busy trying to eat Swiss alive.

"Easy," Swiss pants, voice thick, "let a guy breathe, we don't all have gills."

Rain chirps, burying his face in Swiss's throat instead. The spell of his tongue seems to be breakable by lack of sight and contact, and Rain comes back to himself enough to realize he's being carried. His arms slung over broad shoulders, long legs around narrow hips, Swiss strides down the hall towards his room. Rain feels his cheeks heat. He must have been really out of it to let someone carry him this far without realizing it.

"Let me down," he mumbles, lips rasping against Swiss's stubble. "I can walk, you don't -"

Swiss shushes him, kisses his horn.

"Nah," he sounds so pleased, "you're indulgin' me, I can let you play princess tonight."

Swiss's hands squeeze his ass and Rain's cock throbs, trapped between their stomachs. He gives his hips a wriggle, chasing stimulation, and Swiss gives one of his cheeks a slap instead.

"Stay still," he says, firm. A tone Rain rarely hears, but goes straight to his balls every time. He repeats his little grind anyway, and his reward is Swiss grunting and getting a solid grip on his slender waist. "Rain," he rumbles, and Rain's head swims, "patience. I don't want to trip and fall on top of you."

"m sorry," Rain mumbles, not sorry at all, "can't help it. You feel so nice." He rocks again and Swiss sighs.

"Look at me, Rain."

It's an order, and Rain thinks they won't get very far tonight if Swiss keeps sounding so authoritative. It's doing funny things to places he's still learning about, and he can feel where his dick has started to get his pants wet. Still, though, he meets Swiss's piercing gaze. The sparkle there betrays his calm demeanor. He opens his mouth and Rain immediately zeroes in again.

"Stay."

So much fang.

"Still."

So much tongue.

Rain's jaw drops and Swiss catches him in a wet, nasty kiss that serves to switch Rain's brain right off. All that matters is Swiss invading his mouth, the warmth of it sensual in the best way. He tastes like weed, like cider, like whisky and black pepper, and Rain has the sudden desire to taste nothing else ever again. Nothing but Swiss.

He doesn't come back to himself so easily this time, not even when Swiss pulls away for air. The other ghouls makes sure their tongues stay in contact always, and something in Rain's chest burns with it. But soon enough their lips meet again and Rain loses it all again, content to float in a space not quite anywhere. The breaks start to get longer, but Rain only notices in the most cursory way.

He doesn't come back in any meaningful way until Swiss's mouth disappears from his for minutes, and as the cobwebs filling his skull begin to fall away several things become apparent.

One, he's on a bed. Whose bed? Swiss's probably. It smells more like him. Either way, not important.

Two, he's naked as the day he was summoned. On his back, blinking at a dimly lit ceiling. He moves his legs only to realize they're folded, his feet planted on the mattress an his thighs spread. He can't get them to close, something's in the way. Which brings him to,

Three, there is something warm and wet and the juncture of his hip and thigh. Sucking pressure, it makes his bones vibrate. There are whiny, feminine sounds bouncing off the walls. Are they coming from him? Rain shakes his head in an effort to return to his body, managing at length to lift his head. It still takes a moment for him to focus enough to make out Swiss's prone form.

He's between Rain's newly marked thighs, shoulders pinning them open while he mouths at a twitching muscle in Rain's groin. There are bites all over - his chest, his thighs, his hips - in a dozen shades of purple, and he doesn't remember getting a single one. Fuck, how out of it was he? The thought makes his cock throb so hard he grunts, and Rain watches the blurt of pre it spits join a not-small puddle on his belly.

"So whaddaya say, sweetheart," Swiss sounds like he's far away, but the words feel familiar. Like this isn't the first time he's heard them. "You ready for somethin' new?"

"Yeah," Rain rasps, and his own voice surprises him. "Show me." It feels like he's been talking for a while, his throat feels sore, but he can't recall. What has he agreed to? Swiss purrs, low and lustful, and Rain thinks it may be the best sound he's ever heard.

"Good boy," he murmurs, licking his lips. That fucking tongue again. Rain blinks away the encroaching haze, forces himself to at least try to pay attention. Swiss shifts enough to get those large fingers on his thighs, patting them. "Gonna open you up now, okay?"

Rain blinks, nods without really meaning to, and Swiss gives him another wink. Before he knows what's happening those hands are at the backs of his knees, and Rain gasps when his legs are pushed apart and up towards his chest. It shocks something in him, and snippets of conversation come with it.

"You want to what?"

"Lick you out," Swiss's phantom voice echoes through his memory. "Get the tongue you're so obsessed with on you and make you sing real sweet."

Rain wonders if his stomach swooped like this the first time they had that exchange. The memory perks him up enough to catch his breath, caged by his own legs and Swiss's strong arms. Swiss gazes at him past the flushed, slick length of his cock, bobbing rigid over the flat plane of his stomach, and Rain flinches when he feels warm air ghost over his very exposed hole.

"You're so pink here," Swiss coos, "Pink and wet. All for me? I think it is." He shimmies down the bed - if Rain were able to focus on anything, he wouldn't have missed Swiss grinding into the mattress along the way - placing a wet kiss on each of Rain's balls along the way. Each one has him gasping, but the more he remembers about the things he's forgotten tonight, the clearer his head gets.

"You're gonna lick me...there?"

"Only if you want me to," Swiss had said with a shrug. Casual. "Think you'll really like it."

"Does it go...like..." Rain had made a middle school gesture, one finger stuck through a ring of two others. "In...inside?"

The sudden flash of a fox-like grin has Rain's eyelids fluttering, even just as a memory.

"Only if you ask very nicely."

The press of warm lips against his taint snaps him back to the present.

"S-Swiss," Rain hisses, grabbing on instinct for his wagging cock, achy and purpled. "W-wait, wait -"

The words are little more than a whisper, and Rain is somehow completely unprepared for the hot slide of that tongue over his slick, twitching hole.

Rain gasps, loud and shocked, as Swiss licks up to his balls and back again, pausing to circle that tight pucker. The feel of it is singular, electric jolts up his spine and deep in his pelvis. Every slow, wicked pass of that rough tongue rips utterly involuntary sounds from his throat. Quicker than he can make sense of, the hesitance and reluctance simmering at the back of his mind evaporate.

"Fuck."

It's good.

"Oh, fuck."

It's...it's so good.

He's being so loud all of a sudden. He knows it, his own yelps and whines echo around him, broken up only by the filthy sound of Swiss licking at him with what can only be called perverse reverence. Their eyes remain locked through it all, hazy cerulean with sparkling gold. Swiss looks amused, the corners of his eyes crinkles and his lips curved. Maybe more smug than amused, but Rain doesn't really care right now.

"Like it?" Swiss asks, his voice low and dark.

"Uh huh," Rain nods, breathless. He moves his leg and - oh, when had he started holding them? Had Swiss asked? "Keep going, please keep - oh."

It's faster now, just a little, but rougher too. Swiss punctuates his licks with full, messy kisses right on his hole. Every one has Rain's cock kicking and pouring pre, his skin slick and shiny with it. He can't look at it any longer, has to let his head thump back against the mattress so he can loose the deeply pained groan caught between his lungs.

"Knew you would," Swiss breathes, dragging careful fingertips along quivering thighs. He brushes soft knuckles over Rain's tight sack, and it draws all of Rain's attention back to the righteous ache between his legs.

"Fuck, touch me," he spits between grit teeth, drowning in the way Swiss worships him. His cock pulses in time with his racing heart, sways in the air. "Please, please touch it Swiss, please - fuck!"

Rain's tight pleas melt into high, hurt cries when Swiss does just what he asked. Wraps a large hand around Rain's straining shaft, grips it at the bottom and gives it a nice shake.

Swiss gives him a single stroke, a firm lick, and Rain's eyes roll back in his skull.

"Oh fuck," he gasps, "oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck -"

He's chanting it, a pained mantra pouring from between kiss swollen lips as though he can't believe any of this. He's sweaty at his hairline, and the more Swiss works him the more he shakes. He laps away like a thirsty dog, milking pre and slick and pleasure from him with each swipe. He twists his wrist just so, rubs his thumb over the frenulum, and Rain's whole being goes tense.

"Oh fuck," he squeaks, tight and almost panicky. He knows Swiss can feel the way he gets harder between his fingers, his abdomen going taut and his back bowing off the bed.

Swiss nudges at his pucker, twists his wrist, and it spells Rain's end.

He cums with a stuttering, breathy groan, spilling hot and heavy over his own chest and belly, coating his marked skin with stripes of pearly white. Swiss tugs him through the whole thing, milks him with short strokes and soft licks.

Rain barely feels any of it, at least at first. His mind has gone to soup, liquidized and useless, lost to pleasure and overwhelm. He doesn't feel it until he really feels it, sudden overstimulation that has hip dropping his shaking legs and grabbing for Swiss's horns, his hair, anything.

Swiss pulls back on his own, though. Releases Rain's slowly softening cock and presses soothing kisses to his thigh. Swiss smiles up at him, deceptively sweet.

"So, whaddaya think?"

Rain wants to tell him several things. Wants to say how good it was, but how overwhelming. So much pleasure being derived from an act he had never considered until maybe twenty minutes ago. One he had nearly panicked over when realization hit. He still has no idea how much time he lost when he was hypnotized by Swiss's tongue.

He wants to, but then Swiss licks his lips. He licks his lips and Rain notices that he's wet from nose to chin. It's a sight he's only been privy to on the few occasions they've shared Dew; Swiss always insists on burying as much of his face in the little ghoul's cunt as he can, until he's drenched and sated.

To see the same look on his face, the same wetness, just from licking him...it's enough to have Rain's body buzzing all over again.

"Again," he slurs, tucking his hands behind his thighs and folding himself. Exposing himself. "Do...do that again."

Swiss gives him a cheshire grin, nods, and for some reason Rain's fried brain has trouble processing why Swiss is hovering higher instead of slipping back down. Why he's moving to run that impossibly perfect tongue over his still-twitching abdomen. He doesn't quite manage to put it together, though.

So imagine his surprise when Swiss ducks between his cheeks, spits Rain's own mess onto his already slippery hole and dives in for seconds.

"Swiss," he chokes out, once his own stunned shout fades from his ears, "I - I want -" Rain's chest heaves, the attention being paid to his most sensitive spot hurtling him straight back into the realm of overstimulation. "Need...need - fuck!"

Swiss stares up at him, gaze heavy with pleasure, and Rain's soft cock gives a valiant twitch. He swallows hard, clenches around nothing, and forces the words to come.

"Stick it in," he demands, breathy. "Gimme your tongue. Put it - Lucifer - push it in and...and fuck me with it."

The last words are breathless and whiny, and Swiss huffs out a laugh. It blows cool against his heated rim, and Swiss pulls back just enough for Rain to catch sight of his tongue.

"Whatever you want, baby."

Rain's tired eyes go wide as he watches Swiss's tongue bifurcate and extend, the other ghoul dropping the slightest hint of his glamour. Goosebumps rocket up all over his trembling body, that flexible appendage slips inside his winking hole, and Rain keens.

It's going to be a long night.

[the-alarm-system]

Anti Endos and Projection of Decisions and Hurt

I'd like to start this off with my story and how it relates to the experiences of many hurt anti-endos.

I don't remember a big chunk of my original trauma, most of it feels like a dream that has chunks guarded by Red our protector. I do have bits and pieces, and I know for a fact that I went through RAMCOA.

Growing up I got hurt by a lot of women, and one of those woman's personas got introjected into my system and would retraumatize me consistently for a few years. This was before I realized I was plural.

What Im trying to say is I have survived a lot of horrible shit, and I know it's why I'm plural, and I have had horribly abusive headmates before.

Anti Endos bring these forms of exo and internal abuse up whenever attacking the slogan "The future is plural". I saw an anti endo say

---

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And I got angry enough to make this. Maybe it was rage bait, but I'm convinced most of them genuinely believe this.

Using your own trauma and hurt to invalidate the existence of others is one of the most vile horrible things you can do. Not every traumagenic system is formed from programming, not every system existing is formed from programming. Trust me I know the pain of being hurt that way, but are you serious? Don't use your trauma to hurt others. No endo wants to fucking program a child and abuse them, this is just a false analogy used to bring fear to others and towards the movement. We are not the enemy.

-----

---

I have experienced strong negatives, I've felt strong dissociation, memory loss, and Scald has gotten lost before and we do struggle a lot in disordered experiences. But this is expecting that every system puts the negatives above the positives. This is expecting that your experience and perspective of your own system lines up with everyone elses. I don't care that I have so much to deal with, being a system makes me extremely happy and I would love to share that with others. Obvious negatives? Yes, but "few" positives? In my experience with DID, psychosis, and even BPD I do my best to see the lighter side of them because I wouldn't be me without them. I have so many more pros than cons that comes with being a system because I actively changed my perspective in order to accept ourselves. I had to see the joy of it because I was abusing Scald by not accepting him and giving him individuality. I understand a system seeing their DID as more negative than positive, but this is projection to others which is simply narrow minded.

Before going deeper, I want to affirm that I have no hatred towards those who go towards final fusion or uses parts language. This is an argument about those who project their end goals and hurt and suffering onto other systems in order to invalidate them.

While I may not experience this towards my own system, I can understand why others may despise being many and/or desire to end as a singlet. However in the argument against endos; being broken, wanting fusion, using parts language, and hating yourself as a system is bought up multiple times. Here are some examples:

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Their views on their systemhood, while valid, is narrowed to the expectation that every other system should see it that way and if they don't they are put into the pile of fakes and subject to harassment. Anti endos have called me disgusting simply for expressing how happy being a system makes me. It reminds me of when I was a transmedicalist(essay for later) to be honest.

If you don't want to fuse, if you don't see your systems existence as an abomination, and you desire better acceptance from the world

You are a fucked up groomer who is anti recovery, never wants to heal, and wants to abuse children.

I'm sorry I love my system

I'm sorry I found so much joy in my system that I would love for there to be more of us and better acceptance of us

I'm sorry that I'm not all pessimistic on my system

To be honest, I can't change the past I went through, I can't delete my system,

But maybe to me it's ok to see the good that came out of it even if its hard then and hard now

Projecting your perspective of your systemhood onto others though, projecting false analogies based on your own trauma, and expecting every experience to be the same as yours is vile and just self victimizing in order to hurt vulnerable systems looking for community.

Giving your sob story, ranting about how you hate your pieces/headmates, and then tying it up with "and thats why endos want to hurt children" is a different level of fucked up

small personal note: if I had to endure everything again just to be with Scald, I would Over and over and over Piss yourself mad about it antis, I love my system and we aren't faking because of it

[itsmaferart]

My possible END of Spy x family. Part 1

In the past I've already talked a bit about what I think the possible enemies of Spy x Family could look like, however, I haven't talked about the possible resolution of the characters, and that's where I see several scenarios.

For starters, let's start with the WISE conflict and the war. I've always believed that agencies can have parallels to their respective agents peace and war. And, like many, I think the best case scenario is that Yor and Loid can retire from their jobs or perhaps take positions where they are less at risk. I sincerely believe that Endo will not give us a rosy ending in which peace is achieved indefinitely and all vestiges of war are eliminated. In fact, a constant message in SxF is that peace can only be achieved through hard work and effort to try to understand each other, just like Loid who constantly struggles to understand his daughter, in the end he knows that although Anya and he are totally different, he always knows that with a little effort both can understand each other.

Both WISE and Garden pretend to be fighting against war and protecting their respective countries. But the truth is that both organizations are trapped in this endless circle of violence, and without realizing it, they continue to promote it. Twilight himself knows that the peace they have is illusory and ephemeral, just as the lies between the Forgers maintains the bond.

Which, is a parallel to the Forger Family:

What keeps the peace in Forger family together is the lies, the marriage agreement, is what keeps the peace in the home because it was 'convenient' for both sides, a woman from Ostania and a Man from Westalis. While both hide under the table all the violence in their lives.

Yes, Thorn Princess and Twilight fight to keep the peace, and avoid war to maintain a fragile peace. Sacrificing their entire lives and yet they have not been able to avoid it. Anya is a reflection of how vulnerable peace built on lies is. Anya is vulnerable as a child, and has been the byproduct of an experiment, and the lies are what allow her fake family to stay together and not be abandoned. While generations like Yuri a government agent, university terrorists whose heads are filled with garbage and hate speech; or Anya who was an experiment, or the children of Eden who are exposed to kidnappings and terrorism. As long as the lies continue the violence will continue.

That is why, even if Westalis and Ostania sign a peace treaty, but underneath it, hatred, lies and personal ambitions continue. Things will remain the same and there will always be the possibility of a war again. Just as the Forger family is fragile to disintegration as long as they are hiding their identities.

With this in mind, I see it possible that in a scenario where eventually one of the outcomes is that both WISE and Garden will have to disappear and, perhaps, transform into other types of organizations. I am not suggesting that they necessarily go public, but that the way they operate is different from what has been established. In that way, both countries must work in a different way than they have been doing if they really want to achieve something resembling peace..

Destroy all the lies and start from scratch, just as the Forger family will eventually have to do.

This opens up several scenarios:

If WISE is to disappear or become another type of pro-peace organization, this may begin a process of reintegration of the agents, in which case, Twilight will have to decide whether to remain an agent or decide to retire. Which leads to two options, Twilight decides to join, but under a less risky job.

In this case, Twilight decides to retire from WISE and start a new life with his family. And while I think it is unlikely that this will happen easily given the state of WISE and its agents. What I assume, is that agencies like WISE may end up changing or restructuring, and this allows Twilight to leave.

Another possible idea for Twilight to leave is that he suffers a significant loss. A slightly old theory is that Twilight may come to suffer from the loss of his left eye, due to Edo's constant referrals, as he twice came close to losing it. This could cause WISE to decide that he is no longer a fit agent for the field.

Another possible route would be for Twilight to decide to remain with WISE but in a different role:

In this scenario I would like to think about Sylvia's possible fates. One in which Sylvia is the one who wants to retire and be able to spend the rest of her life resting because she got tired of taking care of the faces of so many dumb rookies and wants to spend the rest of her time with her good friend Aaron.

Another idea is that Sylvia occupies one of the higher positions and is promoted, and Twilight is her successor, being the one who has the role of the Handler.

In both cases, Twilight would leave the field, and since he already has experience training disciples like Nightfall. Twilight takes less physical risk and can use all that experience to train better agents who work in peace.

And now that I mention Nightfall I think an interesting ending would be that whether or not Twilight decides to continue being a peace agent, it would be Nightfall who succeeds his position as the best agent.I feel that would be a good developmental ending. I know that at the current point, Nightfall is someone who acts unable to let go of her love for Twilight, however, she is also the person who most understands that Twilight is very much in love with his family.

Considering that Endo has made reference to Nightfall admiring Twilight's dream of fighting for peace and wishing to obtain it for himself. It would be interesting, if at the end her master can talk to her and tell her how proud he is of her and her effort, and that he hopes she will take better care of herself.

I think it would be a bittersweet ending of Nightfall accepting that her mentor loves his family, while she follows that promise of love by fighting for peace.

[editedantiendoposts]

I'm pro endo and pro ending all anti-endo hate.

[thestarpletsystem]

{I'm going to post this as it's own thing as well, since I'm pretty proud of it. This is in response to "The Future is Plural" and those who respond with The Future is Singlet. This entire thing is aimed at anti-endos, and I think is an important read for them. I also wanted it to reach my normal audiance as well, since a lot of you probably have some of the tags I tagged the original as blocked.}

"The future is singlet" goes back to what I reblogged earlier, which I doubt y’all would see since it’s a pro-endo post. Nobody is asking for there to be more abused kids. If they are, they probably aren’t speaking in good faith on this argument or they have something else they need to work through.

Let’s say that we know, 100% for a fact, the only way to be a system is through trauma. There is still use for you in that phrase. The point of “the future is plural” is not what it says on the tin, as you've shown. We’re not asking for there to be more systems, if we’re thinking strictly in your terms. We’re asking for it to be believed; for it to be taken seriously. We want it to be normalized in the way where if someone says “hey I’m plural” we believe them. We want there to be more understanding and less hate. We want to ensure that those ahead of us don’t have to face what we have, and that what those before us have done was not in vain.

You know why it’s not okay for clinicians to abuse their patients with DID? It’s not because they woke up one day and decided “maybe we shouldn’t be treating our patients like this.” It’s because activists before us did their job. Back in the ‘80s there were so many fucked up practices being done to those with DID, named MPD at that time. Which I must include because it is pertinent to the history of our disorder. Law suits have been brought to court and have been won over these practices. Now, while we are quite a bit better in terms of clinicians that specialize in DID, we aren’t in terms of the general population. They may still believe we are voilent and scary. They may still believe that it’s not a real disorder. They may still believe that it’s just like what they see on TV. Which, as everyone here knows, it isn’t.

We want to make sure they understand that we are humans, too. While we may be many, we aren’t terrible or lying or any number of things others who have no experience with DID think. We, as a community, deserve better. We deserve to be believed. We deserve to be treated with respect and dignity.

And so, I bring it back to one of my first points. Even if we were arguing for there to be more systems, it’s not in the way you desperately want to believe. It’s not begging for more traumatized children. It’s not through pain and suffering. Its a call for pride on all sides. It’s also recognition of the systems that just happen, it’s to celebrate the beauty of those who found their plurality and aren’t traumatized like you or I. You can believe that systems and dissociation ONLY form from trauma, but you wouldn’t be right. To the end where even Dr. Collin A. Ross, one of, if not THE leading researcher in the field, outright states that there are those out there who have been diagnosed with DID and who struggle with dissociation who have no trauma history. He himself has said that there are even people who are multiple that would not fit the criteria or don’t have the difficulty that those with DID must to experience for it to be the disorder it is. (Thanks sysmedsaresexist!)

If you won’t listen to those who experience endogenic plurality, if you won’t listen to those who have done research and have still come to this conclusion, if you won’t listen to those leading in the field of trauma and dissociation, then who will you listen to? How will you be able to make sure you’re not spreading the same misinformation and hate that the phrase “The future is plural” is a desperate plea to combat? How are you better than the endogenic systems you want to demonize so badly?

[traumascumathena]

Pluralkit (and by proxy, Tupperbox) were not and are not the only proxy bots frequently utilized by systems. There was also Systemtime, which ran from 2019 to 2020. There’s a lot of misinformation about Systemtime, as well as the smaller proxy bots that arose shortly after it shut down, and so I believe I should dispel some of what I can. 

I will first state what I authority I do have on this matter. I was an active member of the server where Systemtime was first thought up of, and actively followed its development from conception to final shutdown. 

And secondly, what was Systemtime?

Systemtime was a proxy bot developed for only DID/OSDD1 systems, by a system.

Systemtime, initially, was not intended to be a fully-fledged bot that anyone could invite to their servers. It was initially only meant to be used for under a dozen or so servers, the vast majority of them small and personal, and the main one large but not easily invited to. In this time, Systemtime utilized some code ripped from Pluralkit. At this time, Systemtime was entirely private, and its servers were just an old laptop constantly running. 

Eventually, people in the main server thought that Systemtime should be more expansive, and the dev agreed. So, Systemtime’s code was rewritten entirely, a support server was launched, and Systemtime was now able to be invited to anyone’s server. Systemtime was advertised as only for DID/OSDD1 systems as an anti-endo alternative to the known pro-endo Pluralkit. 

Systemtime grew rapidly in popularity and garnered a lot of attention from all sides of the syscourse debate, including Pluralkit devs and server admins. At multiple points, Systemtime was DDOS-ed. An admin from the Pluralkit support server confirmed that they were behind at least one DDOS attack. Many of these attacks constituted of spamming the servers with files containing racist and antisemitic imagery, including accusations against the Systemtime dev for being a nazi. After multiple attacks, it was decided that Systemtime would go offline permanently for the dev’s safety. 

And that was the end of Systemtime. A popular alternative to Pluralkit, gone. People caught wind of the fact it was just a fork of Pluralkit before it went public and decided to ignore that the code was rewritten from scratch upon official release. And honestly, even if Systemtime was an exact copy of Pluralkit, it still would not justify the harassment campaign against the dev and the multiple DDOS attacks. It would not justify the antisemitism and racism coming from Pluralkit staff. 

And it would not justify the hypocrisy here either. Pluralkit’s code is available on GitHub, and anyone can make a fork of it for themselves. At some points, Pluralkit utilized code seen in versions of Tupperbox, and no one batted an eye. 

And as I said earlier, there were more proxy bots made. Some of them were forks of Systemtime, and some were forks of Pluralkit, and I do remember one fork of Tupperbox. All of them were very short-lived. Some went down due to harassment. Some went down due to a lack of consistent servers. Some went down due to a loss of interest. 

But all of those were created because Systemtime was permanently shut down. In darkness, there is light. 

I talk about this because of a statement about pro-endo contributions to the DID/OSDD1 community. I found it odd, that people could confidently say that Pluralkit was a great contribution, because there was no alternative--without even knowing that Pluralkit staff helped destroy the most popular alternative. This incident was confined to discord servers, however, so I do understand why not many people know. I might have been too online back then, for better or for worse. 

[sophieinwonderland]

I think you should reconsider posting in anti-endo tags. I understand it when you write a response to one of their anti-endo posts tagged with e.g. "pro endo" (i.e. invading our spaces), but posting in anti-endo tags otherwise is just childish (yes, anti-endos that invade tags are also childish). Be the bigger person. I suggest instead making more posts in pro-endo tags to bury the anti-endo posts or responding to more invading posts so innocent anti-endos know why you are posting in their tags.

I've been considering and reconsidering going nuclear for months while I watched anti-endos increasingly invading inclusive tags. Aspen and her TikTokers were the straw that broke the camel's back, but it was the anti-endo vent blog and similar that started regularly posting in plural tags that made me consider just going all out and making this a regular thing.

At this point, I no longer see any tactical advantage in avoiding those tags.

My old tactics were never about protecting "innocent anti-endos." They were about leverage that could be used to protect innocent pro-endos. If I avoided posting in anti-endo tags except for when they breached our spaces, I hoped the threat of me posting in theirs would keep them at bay. And for a while, I think it worked.

But that's over now and I don't see things returning to how they were any time soon.

With that in mind, if pro-endos are going to be exposed to hate daily in our spaces, then it's only fair to make sure anti-endos are exposed to ME.

In the end, limiting myself to not posting in anti-endo tags was always handicap that allowed anti-endo's to hide away in an echo chamber. This was a handicap I took gladly to maintain the peace, but no longer feel is beneficial now that this peace has collapsed.

And for the record, this IS me being the bigger person.

I may be going into their tags, but I'm not fakeclaiming them.

I'm not making cringe blogs to makes fun of their positivity posts.

I'm not repurposing rightwing queer phobic rhetoric to accuse them of grooming of children.

I'm not wishing them death on them.

Turns out, it's not hard to be the bigger person when the other side are twisted scumbags who are calling for your death.

But if they're changing the rules for how this game is played, it's only fair that I play by the rules they set.

Besides that, anti-endos in those tags know about the vast amounts of crosstagging and these very public hate posts, and the vast majority choose to say and do nothing about it. As far as I'm concerned, they're all complicit in the above hate posts we've been getting in our community.

So this is where we're at. Mutually assured destruction. If our community is going to burn then so will theirs!