#she destroyed me on levels I didn't even know existed

[deanscasanova]

two episodes into s2 and ofmd has officially reached 4th place in total number of cries this year, overtaking both 'the raven cycle' and 'work' (a tough one to beat!)

next target is 'animals' for 3rd place, which I truly don't think will be a problem at this rate

[rekino2114]

Nobara kugisaki, Maki Zenin and Utahime Iori with a boyfriend that's pretty much an affectionate airhead and appears to be weak but he gets revealed as a special grade sorcerer which they didn't know cause it never occurs to him to tell them

Nobara, maki, utahime and mai with an airhead special grade reader.

A/n:I hope you don't mind me fusing your two requests and adding mai cause they were pretty similar.

Nobara kugisaki

Nobara doesn't really mind your personality. She can be a bit of an airhead herself sometimes (especially with yuji), so sometimes she gets swept up in your demeanor.

She enjoys your affection quite a lot even if she may not always show it, there is nothing she loves more than hugging you in public to show off how cute you are together, especially when she gets jealous of another girl.

During a mission she asked you to try to take one of the curses arms so she could use resonance on it, she was left with her mouth wide open when you indeed brought her the arm....complete destroying the curse in the process, the following explanation that you're a special grade left her even more in shock.

"So.....You're a special grade like gojo-sensei?"

"Yep"

".....why the heck didn't you tell me?"

"I mean, you never asked"

"*sighs* You're lucky I love you"

Maki zenin

Maki gets annoyed because of you....a lot, even if she loves you the amount of times she has to explain things to you and drag you away from stupid situations gets to her sometimes.

The same thing goes with the affection you give her. She doesn't like it, she will mostly push you away but seeing you sad hurts her so if you continue to ask her enough times she might accept hugs while blushing a lot.

She was hesitant to train with you at first due to how weak you looked but her opinion quickly changed when she found out you could keep up with her physical power even with her heavenly restrictions.

"H-how did you- You're so strong!"

"Thanks, it's nothing a special grade can't handle"

"..........what?"

"Oh did I forget to mention that? I'm a special grade sorcer- ow! That hurt"

"That's what you get for not telling me"

Mai zenin

Unlike her sister, mai really likes your personality. You look cute in her eyes even if she might get annoyed sometimes, she can't stay mad at her cute little boyfriend for too long.

She also loves how affection you are, it makes her feel more confident in your relationship and she likes to show you off to everyone.

She's not that strong either so she was surprised when you two were paired up for a mission and was worried you were gonna get hurt but she was quickly proven wrong by your strength.

"Wow you're strong! You might even be on a special grade level"

"Thanks. That's because I am one"

"You are? How come you never told me?"

"I guess i didn't think you would be interested in knowing that sorry"

"It's fine, I think I deserve a kiss as an apology, though"

Utahime iori

Utahime is very conflicted about you. She loves you, but you remind her of a certain white-haired sorcerer who is the bane of her existence, she tries her best to stay calm with you though.

She's not fond of affectionate gestures, but she'll accept hand holding if you insist. Please don't do that in front of gojo, though. If you do, he'll never stop teasing utahime about it.

She tried to use her technique to power you up during a mission, but you told her it wasn't necessary before attacking, leaving her absolutely flabbergasted.

"W-what? How? Uh?"

"Why are you that surprised? I am a special grade and that curse was basically nothing"

"Y-YOU ARE?"

"Yeah. I never told you?"

"NO YOU DIDN'T"

"oops, well you know now"

"I-*sighs* I should have known"

[shesnake]

sorry to talk about star wars on main but

Leslye Headland is truly the funniest person alive for saying on record that oshamir was inspired by reylo. like it's the most transparent marketing line to simply tell you that they're "enemies to lovers" (pending) and to bait the reylos (who are arguably the strongest voice in the disney era fandom... like look what they achieved [derogratory]) into caring about non-white characters because yeah The Acolyte Does need the numbers.

and sure this is bringing people into the show for the wrong reasons and also deterring people from the show for the wrong reasons but it's a TRAP lol ms Headland has a comically large shovel-shaped lightsaber and is digging a hole in the ground right in front of us all. and I am DIVING IN HEAD FIRST before she's even sprinkled leaves over it. because oshamir is nothing like reylo, because The Acolyte is nothing like disney era star wars!

The Acolyte is critical of the jedi order and the absolutism of the dark side. it's not about Anakin but it does Understand Anakin and what went down in the prequels (unlike the kenobi series which essentially nullified his whole corruption arc...) and the jedi order's unique form of oppression through repression. up until this point we've only seen our protagonists being lured to the dark side through grooming and sabotage by a sith actively turning them away from the jedi.

but in the acolyte, our protagonist Osha has already been fucked over by the jedi without the influence of any sith! they killed her family, they killed her PEOPLE/RELIGION, they left her sister Mae to die (after they already decided she had terrible vibes), and they abandoned her as a "failure" because after all they did to cut her away from her life THEY DIDN'T WANT HER because she was affected by the trauma THEY CAUSED.

and they did say to Sol from the start that she was too old to be recruited. how many other padawans must they have done this to while they were too young for that trauma to grow and could still be groomed to believe in the force in the way the jedi order do. Sol is horrified at Qimir/The Stranger for killing a child and he just shrugs and says "you brought her here" because it really is on him.

but yeah Osha at this point in the story with her lived experiences is an adult who cannot be manipulated like that, by a jedi OR a sith. and so what other approach can Qimir really make to lure Osha over to the dark side except to... talk to her? sure there's a seductive subtext to it, but this is the first time we've seen someone with the force, sith or jedi, have to present their case like an adult To an adult.

and as the no.1 jedi order hater this is SO compelling to me because everything Qimir has to say is SO true and yeah manny is hot and amandla is hot and when you think about it he did kind of give her a knife lightsaber because he wants someone on that same level of enlightenment with him which does expose him to creating someone who could very well destroy him but he's taking that risk with her because he does Know her already from what he sees of himself and he's just going to get to know her better and they're both just going to keep talking it through and developing that set of beliefs together in That Beautiful Separation They Felt and she'll learn more about him and his particular history his real name and the scars on his back and also there's what he represents as a minority in the world and Headland's connection to him as a lesbian and how it feels like they don't want you to exist and let's not forget the colonial metaphors the manifest destiny of the way the jedi operate she'll see how alike they are and she'll be able to come into herself as an empowered user of the force and that'll be thanks to him and the journey will be Glorious!

but none of that is going to change the fact that before he made this intellectual/civilised/human/seductive approach with her as an adult HE STILL GROOMED HER SISTER and Osha is NEVER going to forget that because if she and Mae are the same person she's the only one left to remember he did that to her/them and I cannot fucking WAIT to see her lightsaber turn green when she finally runs it through his chest god bless 🥰

[yawnderu]

I’ve been thinking… Simon from the haunted series as Yandere by Jazmin bean

IT JUST FITS SO WELL IN MY BRAIN IDK

GIRLLL I FUCKING LOVE THAT SONG EHJBJBHEFJEHBF Using Simon from my Haunted series<3

cw: mild gore, possessive Simon, obsessive Simon.

''Stay near and you''ll have nothing to fear.'' His instructions were clear once he taught you how to visit him in your dreams, able to see the horrors beyond your comprehension that exist outside of the human eye, their universe much more bizarre and interesting than yours.

You know how to get to him— he explained it hundreds of times, warning you that the other creatures will not be half as nice as him, yet listening was hard when you're absolutely mesmerized by a ballerina, her delicate yet strong movements so captivating that you don't even notice how you're walking closer and closer to her, alleyway getting narrower with each step you take closer to her, yet she seems to make do with the little space she has left. Like a moth to a flame, you get allured right into the deadly trap, mind fully blank except for the full focus on her alluring dance.

She only stops dancing once you're right in front of her, bony hands cupping your cheeks delicately as her face gets closer to yours, lips puckering as if prepared to give you a kiss. It's wrong— you know that much, yet you're completely paralyzed and at her mercy, unable to do anything other than looking at the way her lips part, mouth opening and revealing a sharp set of teeth, red eyes glistening with a need to hurt and a hunger that can only be satiated by you.

It happens so suddenly you don't even register the way her head gets smashed into the wall; brains splattered all over the place while the taller man looks down at you with narrowed eyes.

''I told you to come directly to me.'' His tone is harsh, yet you know it's full of laced concern for you. He knew it was a dumb fucking mistake to teach you how to lucid dream and get to his world, yet his obsession always took him to levels he didn't even know he was able to reach.

He hovers over you, chest against your face to get you to back away without touching you with his bloodied hands. It seems like an intimidation tactic— looking down at you and being as brooding as they come, but he's trying to avoid you looking at the now dead body of the other monster, her head completely destroyed on the floor. It works, as you back away with him until you're out of the dark alleyway, one of his arms wrapping over your shoulder and keeping you close.

''Don't look at anyone— don't even listen to anyone other than me.'' He knows the monsters in his world would do anything to get their hands on you, either feeding off of your energy or you as a whole, though Ghost will never allow that to happen. Your souls are bound for eternity, and he always protects what belongs to him.

[pearlaquaoceans]

The amount of stuff knocking around in my head about episode 99 have me thinking nonstop about some of the gods and I gotta write it down. This might not make sense or it might not be how the gods will appear by the end of the three episodes but oh man am I invested right now.

Sarenrae - I could have only dreamed for Ashley to play the everlight but she is and it is perfection. I have missed the warmth of Sarenrae since VM and to have her back is fantastic and to have Ashley who showed such a love for her as Pike is so beautiful and wonderful.

I am totally behind Sarenrae falling in love and having a family in her mortal form. She loves humanity much like Pelor but being the goddess of forgiveness, she can understand them more and see their flaws but also the beauty in those flaws. I think because she forgives she can also see humans as the full beings they are and she loves them still. How could see come to Earth and see the good in people, and allow them forgiveness when they do wrong, and not love them? Humanity is messy and falling in love is messy and families are messy and it fits so much with what she governs that it just feels right to me. Her being a school teacher feels right to me. I fully believe she is going to carry the scent of the top of her children's heads for as long as she holds that mortal form.

Pelor - This one surprised me. He has always been shown in a domineering and stuffy light. He is a god in a traditional sense who seems untouchable, unreachable, and unparalleled in his grandeur. So the moment Nick Marini spoke as him, I was shook because it was so very... gentle. Warm. Present. I cannot remember the last time my feelings on a character did such a left turn that I was not expecting. As soon as he spoke I was in. I was invested.

And Pelor is in that traditional way, a god. Someone who loves his creations but also sees them as.. feeble. Needing guidance from the gods. It is a hubris that any god is capable of. Yet because of that, he is equally caring. This is the Pelor I had never seen. We have seen him be kind in a way with Vex, demanding with his followers, and unforgiving of the sins commited in his name, but we have not seen him gentle. And here, we see him so gentle. So caring for their creations. He wants them to survive, to feel more than just pain in existence. For the first time I truly believe he loves humanity. Maybe it will change in the next few episodes but for now.. I for the first time, care about him.

The Matron - Mmmmmaaaannnn I would expect nothing less than for Laura to play her. They are forever twined and I am so happy she is. The matron is.. so complex and I am stubborn and did not come into this believing I would feel anything but stubborn anger towards her for what she did to Vax even if she didn't really do anything wrong. I do believe she would have given him a long life but she could not and so she has instead chosen to keep him by her side and seeing this version of her... I can see it. I can see Vax giving her a sense of life that she has not felt in many many centuries.

As soon as Laura talked, I felt.. a warmth for her. A feeling, but I was not prepared on any level for the moment she said Purvan's name, to start sobbing. I don't know why but just knowing him and some of his journey, the mirror to Vax, the man who follows his queen and guarded her... I cried. I cried for him and I cried for her. I love that she is the goddess to know intimately what humans are capable of and knowing how little they would hesitate to destroy the gods. She also is willing to remind the gods of the fragility of man. I kinda love it. Damn it.

Melora - Man, the playing of her as relentless in her hunger is so interesting. Because nature exists to eat. Eating is survival. And survival is harsh and uncaring. Nature will not put compassion above survival. Melora is often played as warm and nature can be that but a world that has been choked by smoke and ash for a hundred years is a Melora that is haunted and starving. I love it.

I just really love the three all playing the gods they have been closest to or affect by in the campaigns. I love it. Its such a brilliant move.

[bronx-bomber87]

Happy Wednesday my lovely readers :) We’ve reached the episode that rocked me to my very core. Honestly haven’t been this attached to a ship in a very very long time. Years passed without this level of attachment. Bringing out sides of me I didn't think existed. Like doing reviews. But our ship is something special even when they rip our hearts out. I blame Eric and Melissa LOL They are INCREDIBLE in this episode. The both of them. Brought their A game and then some.

This ep legit affected my mood for 3 weeks no joke and utterly destroyed me. I needed extra days to decompress before did my mini. The fandom was so lovely about that too. Love this fandom so much. I still don't know how I got that out tbh lol Also God Bless my bestie D for going through that with me. I got to watch it early that day which normally didn’t get to. Was usually after work. I remember D wanted to stop me but didn’t cause she couldn’t tell me why..

I had to go to a company meeting after and pretend I wasn’t devastated. Be a positive fun leader when inside I was dying. I did a good job my team had no idea lol But damn that was tough. Never been happier for a 3 week break than after this one. We all needed it. Let us begin. And thank you all again for going through this heartbreak with me. Gif count was rough for me so I fit in everything I could and made a ton.

6x06 Secrets and Lies

We start out with Lucy looking as stressed and anxious as we’ve ever seen her. Laying in bed but most definitely is not resting. The brutal toll this situation has taken becoming visible. When Tamara asks how stressed she is from 1-10? Lucy answering 19….Ooof....Could not be more relatable if she tried. When I get this laser focused I too am a nineteen. Her person has been radio silent for days. Her last contact with him was a massive knock out drag out fight.

This is the most time they’ve spent apart since they got together. Like I stated last review other than 6x01 they've scarcely been away from one another. Her UC mission in 5x21 yes but doesn’t really count. They talked every single day. So it’s truly the longest they’ve been apart. No wonder she is at a 19. Poor Lucy. Kills me. Such a wreck without him. Tamara asks if Tim is still ghosting her? Lucy tries to defend their situation. Not well but she sure tries lol

Lucy is barely keeping it together and it shows. I love that we get a shot of her pin-up board from that BTS video. The cupcake poster hehe Hopefully that makes a triumphant return in s7. Tamara doesn’t want to add to her stress... But let's her know she wants to move out. With friends from school. Worst timing ever. It makes sense but the timing is horrendous. Lucy takes so many hits this season. It’s almost worse the second time around somehow.

This time Lucy goes to an actual adult about Tim. Not useless Nolan who was painfully inept for her. Couldn’t fit it in but we see her touch her tattoo when she approaches Angela. *heart clutch* I love Melissa for doing it every time though. So subtle yet impactful. Nice little mini gut punch to start the scene. This was the right call though. If anyone knows Tim like her it’s Angela. Lucy asking if she should alert Grey? Honestly she should've but here we are. That would've been a whole other set of problems though...

Lucy feels like she’s going insane so Angela validating her helps. (at first) You know she finds this behavior of his incredibly alarming. We can see the immediate worry painted across her face. That’s her brother. She loves that man like he’s one. What sucks is that, even though Angela is empathetic, she doesn’t fulfill the needs that Lucy is going for. Which is reassurance and 'Hey let’s do this together.' A united front. Hoping since he is acting off Angela's reply would be 'Let's find out why as a team.' She is protecting her but Lucy is in a heightened emotional state and doesn't see that. Only see's being shut out further from Tim.

Angela plays her cards very close to her chest. Like a good detective would. Sadly Lucy wanted more solace than just ‘Trust him.’ That’s all she’s been doing for days. Poor woman is going out of her damn mind with worry. Even tells Angela as such. The reply she gets back not what she wanted… She wanted her detective gut and friendship. Unfortunately she just gets the former. That short lived validation she got earlier dying off quickly. Lucy is so damn upset when she takes off from the convo. Knowing if she sticks around she’s going to cry on shift. My damn heart. Melissa be killing me. Holy hell.

Angela scaring the crap out of Tim is hilarious. Serves him right tbh. This episode had me so upset and twisted, I couldn’t even enjoy scruffy Tim in a leather jacket. You know something is wrong when I can’t gawk over this man. Angela has zero trouble finding him. Because well it’s her. This is why Lucy enlisted her. She needed the best to help her. Such best friend behavior from the minute she enters his car.

Drinking his soda, calling him out, and asking WTF is going on? I adore her brazen bravery. This is why we love Angela Lopez. Willing to get herself fired for him. That she can take the hit not Lucy. I mean she’s not wrong….Angela could easily live off Wes. She would hate it but she could. It's a more viable option. Says it can be ‘Wine o’clock for her.’ LOL I always enjoy them. More of them in s7 please writers.

Tim doesn’t argue with her reasoning. Starts to explain the whole Ray debacle. Why he can’t just let him go. What he has on him. That he needs to catch him in a new crime. So he has reason to actually arrest him. Once Tim fully explains Angela just replies. ‘I’m in.’ Tim is shocked because of course he is ha Even though she is his best friend he can't believe has his back like this. Oh my broken boy. He double checks and asks if she’s sure? Her reply being the absolute best. ‘Yeah. I got your back boo.’ Hehe Lucky she’s your best friend my love.

We rejoin our bestie duo at the docks. Scoping out Ray on whatever back door deals he’s doing. She is studying Tim hard in this scene. It’s the best. Angela tries to impart some logic to Tim. Saying he’s followed Ray for two days and nothing. Asking how long he’s going to do this? Tim replying the most Tim Bradford reply. ‘As long as it takes.’ Angela is on her game today and doesn’t let him get away with it. Saying he’s just going to walk away from his job? From his relationship with Lucy? All to arrest a guy he hasn’t thought about in over a decade?

Something isn’t adding up for her and she is letting him know it. Angela gives her patented look. Knowing it’s something more. There’s a reason she’s such a good detective. Woman knows how to get to the root of things. Tim has only given her surface info at this point. Definitely not enough to justify this crusade he’s currently on. Let’s him know Lucy would understand why he lied on the report. She would even commend him for it really. We know she would. She love his soft heart so much. Tim agrees and says she would still get in trouble for knowing and not reporting him to IA.

A risk she would gladly take if you’d let her Timothy… It’s here Angela digs a little deeper. He gets a second stare. Tim finding it aggravating and telling her as such. Angela let's her next truth bomb drop. Saying he’s doing it to protect himself as much as her. That there’s something he’s not admitting. Mic drop. Nailed it and Tim knows it but won’t entertain it further. Has him dead to rights and he knows it. We then get the glorious BFF line. Like it or not she is. lmao Has your number just like your girl.

We return to Angela’s for Tim to break our hearts some more. Theme of this episode. One punch after another. Literally no time to breathe unless you check out during the other SL's. Which I did tbh.... They’re alone so she probes Tim further. Knowing that it has to be so much more than a report. He wouldn't let Ray get under his skin like this if it was that shallow. That he's bearing the weight of something on his soul. Tim gives in and begrudgingly explains what happened. That he had been squad leader most of his tour. That he was looking to move up to Sergeant First Class. Only caveat was he couldn’t have any rampant criminality in his unit.

Ray was in the way of this. Tim decided to keep it within the squad if they caught him themselves. He did an unsanctioned mission… Oh Timothy….He explains how Ray called in an air strike on them. Did this the minute he knew he was trapped. Schmuck would rather take them with him. Such a cowards move. The way Tim describes the air strike. Ugh my heart. His eyes filling up as he depicts how the world imploded around them. Eric is a master of emotion here. So expressive. Looks like he is right back there, with the most haunted look on his face. He thought he was going to die. Being so vulnerable I wanna hug him.

He and Mark were lucky though. The Humvee took the hit for them. But Henderson and Coyle were ripped apart….Ugh and now we see what he’s been bearing. That he led his men to their deaths. Their loyalty and faith in him had cost them their lives. All because Tim was in pursuit of a promotion. For personal glory. Explains why he wouldn't praise himself or take awards pre-Lucy. Or advance his career before her either. He didn’t feel he deserved anything good. Because the last time that was important to him, he got two of his men killed. Imma go cry now.... My poor broken boy. The PTSD is so real.

Eric continues to rip my heart out. Telling Angela there was so much blood. I can't imagine seeing that. They for sure thought Ray was KIA. No way he survived. It’s the way he catches his breath, tears in his eyes in this next part. I'm so upset for him. The way he points at himself when he says leadership. The failure and shame he feels for what he did. When we found out it would be his military background I was excited. I knew it would be dark though. Whatever this was. But my god. I wasn’t expecting it to be this. But makes perfect sense why he’s kept it from Lucy. He can’t bring himself to forgive what he did. How could he expect Lucy to? To still look at him like he’s the same man she fell in love with?

The deep rooted shame is evident in this scene. This is quite the weight to keep on your soul. One I’m sure he’s never told anyone. Not even Isabel about I bet. My guess is he buried it once he was state side. Like most do with trauma. Hoping it would never resurface. Sadly not how trauma goes... The way he tells the story it’s for the first time. You can tell. He’s right back there re-living it all. This scene gives us so much insight to Tim as a person. Why he is the way he is as a cop. As a person. It explains why he lost his damn mind in 2x01 over Lucy falsifying the report. Probably brought him right back there.

This is a very revealing scene. It makes sense why he shoulders things alone. It’s punishment for what he did. Doesn’t think anyone could love him enough to shoulder it with him. That breaks my damn heart. This ep makes me so emotional. *sad sigh* Nothing scarier than the person you love seeing you at your worst. With his background of abuse, it makes sense why he’s hidden this from Lucy. He doesn’t feel worthy of the comfort she would bring him. Only shame that he made a mistake. Tim is very self loathing and this is why. Coupled with his childhood it makes so much sense why he is the way he is…This one is emotionally heavy af. All his unchecked trauma barreling through like a bullet train in this ep.

Lucy arrives home and Tamara is there to take care of her. Saying she ordered pizza. I love this. She needed this. Lucy leaves the room to drop off her stuff. We hear a knock at the door and it’s Ray.... Earlier he scanned Tim’s vehicle and got Lucy’s address. Which made me sick to my stomach. I knew him grabbing it was going to end this way. Best way to get to Tim is through his heart. When Tamara opened the door and it was him..The hairs at the back of my neck stood up. Tamara calls out for Lucy. She emerges and goes into protect mode right away. Eyes on Tamara first but also hating her gun is locked up.

Heart was in my damn throat the entire time. Lucy handles herself like the bad ass we’ve all come to know and love. Commend her for keeping herself composed when she was terrified. I also adore her not putting up with any of his scare tactic BS. Her line about the only call she’s gonna make is for the ambulance. Like hot damn Lucy. Way to protect Tamara and yourself. It's true she could take his scrawny ass easily. I long to be the confident BAMF she is.

Doesn't hurt she’s still got the rage burning from being in the dark. So not only is her life being threatened now Tamara's is. This is Lucy's FINAL straw. It’s now bled over in the worst way. Not only that but she still has no idea what’s going on. We can see that mama bear come out loud and proud. It’s one thing for her to be involved it’s a whole other thing with Tamara dragged in. This is what pushes her to reach out To Tim. To cut his crap. Whatever this is has now endangered an innocent life. One she loves fiercely and will die to protect.

Lucy RAGE calls Tim and unleashes hell. As she should… Demanding to know where his ass is. Tim knowing he can’t hold her back any longer. So he lets her know. I mean Lucy is million percent done with this crap now. With his behavior, him cutting her out, all of it. So very very done. Rightfully so. I do love him answering ‘Hey, what’s wrong?’ Knowing she wouldn’t be calling unless something was. He for sure would’ve dropped it all to go to her.

But she was way too pissed to see that fact. She shows up like a bat out of hell. Biting his head off immediately saying 'Does she look ok?' No….she does not. Forever love Angela escorting Tamara out of the room. Mom and dad about to have it out so let's go. The concern all over his face kills me though. This was the last thing he wanted to happen. The very thing he was striving for by shutting her out backfired horribly. Not only did he endanger her but Tamara too.

It was Lucy’s final straw and she is showing it. These were the types of fights that are needed though. As much as this hurts she is fighting him to save them. Because he is worth the bother and effort. Just like he stated in 5x08. Asking why her and Chris never fight?They’re fighting against each other to protect one another it kills me. Also you know your ship has chemistry when even their fights are lightning in a bottle goodness. Just as amazing as their happy stuff. I can't speak enough to their fantastic on-screen chemistry. Even though this fight is fiery and hurts to watch it's hurts so good to watch them hash it out.

Tim explains who Ray is and Lucy don’t give a single fuck. It’s not who he is that has her raging. It’s him cutting her out that is. I love the movements Melissa does in this scene. I know she had an interview about her being mad. Thinking she was awkward. It wasn't at all. Was so real. I think she nailed it. Her body language is on point. How she stamps her foot. Shouting how who Ray is doesn’t explain why he iced her out. At all. She is VIBRATING with anger. Yelling at Tim to stop protecting her. Which he won't. That is like asking him to stop breathing tbh. He would rather die than not protect her. Ugh his reply of ‘ I can’t. I won’t.’ They’re at odds with the deepest part of their souls. Of who they are.

Tim will never stop protecting her. Just as she will never stop trying to help him. Been in her DNA from the jump. For him to not let her is just as painful as Tim not protecting her. *sigh* This is where their intense need to protect each other backfires so badly. Sounds romantic and sometimes it is. But in these type of moments, it shows the cracks in their already fractured communication. It real though. Communicating is HARD. Especially when you both come from abusive homes where that wasn't taught. If you aren't taught healthy communication you're just not going to do it. Simple as that. It's like a muscle that never gets used. Then when it does it feels so unnatural and painful.

These two are going to be the death of me. Hell they already have been. They have so much to work on in s7. It’s insane. I'm excited for it though. Lucy then brings up how Lopez was read in but not her. She is HIS PERSON. If anyone should be read in it’s her. Consequences be damned. Yeah Angela does have less to lose but that is NOT the point. Tim is clearly not getting that fact. I adore Lucy grabbing his hands during the end of the scene. Mirroring back she 'Can’t and won’t' not help him. Telling him she is over being to good girlfriend. He’s going to let her in NOW. Oooh lord. You Tell 'em Luce.

Their OP to foil Ray goes off without a hitch. Tim tells him it’s over. That there isn’t an air stroke to save him this time. Ray tells Tim ‘I am the air strike. I’m about to blow up your whole life.’ *grumble* It’s so true on many many levels. Watching Tim be so stoic in his IA investigation kills me. Wish could've fit this in. Eric be out here again making me emotional af two eps in a row. You can see the tears in his eyes but the rest of him is controlled. That military background of his coming in clutch.

it pains me to watch him lie and have it destroy him. I remember I saw people saying how could he lie? That’s not like him. Um no. This is very like Tim. Not to lie but to protect those he loves. If lying protects Lucy and Lopez that’s what he’s going to do. He has a history of being a little gray for those he loves. Isabel is a good example of that. All that went down with Detective Murphy was similar to this. ‘Some things matter more.’ Once again rings true with him. Tim is believed over Ray. Because even if Tim doesn’t want to believe this he is the better man.

Better reputation and Percy closes the investigation. Have missed him. But whoever he’s around it’s not good. Love the actor though. What happens after is rough to say the least. Never seen Grey as disappointed in Tim as he is here. Reprimanding him and having to report him to Pine SUCKS. R.I.P. Metro Tim. I loved you so…It’s killing Tim to have Grey look at him this way. Deeply respects him and to be scolded by him cuts him. Just dismisses Tim without further comment or fight….

God almighty the song playing in the background. I don’t even remember it. I only watched this scene once. I think I blacked out a lot in this moment. The immense shock rocked my system. Suffice to say it’s beautiful. The piano, the haunting oohs and lyrics are the perfect backdrop to this devastating scene. I felt this building anxiety watching this scene. Waiting for the hammer to drop. When she pulled him into her arms *phew* It was first breath I had taken in nearly two episodes. These eps had me on the razor's edge of sanity. I love her waiting outside for him and instantly pulling him into her arms. Just like Tim did for her in 5x22. I'm fine.....Imma cry as I write this. Horse heaven playing in my ears right now. Adding to my emotional state. These two getting me all weepy.

I’ll be honest I thought if a break up was coming, it was coming from Lucy the first time. Which is why this devastated me like it did. Having the full season in hand now. Makes total sense it’s Tim. At the time I thought would be her. But that wouldn’t be like Lucy at all. After everything he put her through. The secrets, the lies and shutting her out. She had every damn right. But she loves this man unconditionally. So unconditionally. Everything Lucy does in this scene is a reflection of that unconditional love. There to pick up his broken pieces despite all of that went down. Look at her in those gifs above.

Especially that second one. First time she took a breath too. So grateful to be here for him in this moment. I truly thought ‘Oh. Maybe we’re ok... She’s hugging him.’ Encasing him in her arms. Trying to absorb all of his hurt. Supporting him the way he sought out days previous. Gently cradling him against her. It's the tender way she nestled her fingers at the back of his head that gets me. Tapping into some ship crack for me there. *phew* Honestly thought with her being there for him they would make it out unscathed. I truly did. The chemistry from this hug is unreal btw. Tim doesn’t feel worthy in the least. The way he slumps against her. Doesn’t really hug her back like normal. Can't see Lucy is so willing to absorb his hurt and pain. To love him through this. This hug is beautifully tragic.

Lucy releases him and he looks as broken as I’ve ever seen him. 4x09 x 1000 tbh. He shirks away from her. Hands in his pocket. So disgusted and ashamed with himself. Something l've learned in Pilates is posture and the importance of it. When you stand tall and at full height. You are confident and sure of yourself. When you are slumped it presents a lack of confidence, shame, and feeling unworthy. His posture is screaming that. Like he feels he shouldn’t even be in her presence right now. He crushes me with how he says he lied about everything.

Then sarcastically almost sardonically follows it up with ‘But hey it saved my job….’ The amount of disdain in his voice is gut wrenching. The whole reason he was in this Ray mess was to further himself. To keep his career intact. He saw a promotion and went for it at all costs. What he just did lying to IA was to be that same man again. (In his mind) To put his career first over what’s right. Risked people's lives again as well. People he loves. Sickens him ten years later he’s doing the same thing all over again. Even though it's so different this time. There is still nobility in it with saving Lucy and Lopez. But this man can't see that right now. Doesn't see any good in this situation or himself.

Lucy does her best to sympathize. Telling him it was an impossible situation. If it had been her she would’ve done the same thing. Thing is if it had been for Tim yes she would’ve without question. But he can’t see the forest for the trees atm. He is drowning absolutely drowning in his self-loathing. Tim continues on with the painful self flogging. Telling her she would’ve never been in his position. Putting her on a pedestal while he makes himself very very small. That OTP line from 6x03 from him 'You could never disappoint me.' That is true. The problem is he doesn't realize he could never disappoint her either. Tragically Tim doesn't view it that way. Only sees he's not worthy.

Lucy once again tries to pick up his pieces. Telling him he thought he could handle it. He was wrong but made it right. It’s like she can sense him pulling away in this moment. Doing her best to calm his fears about himself. Trying to do what she’s always done in years past best. Build him up. Soothe him. Sadly she isn’t gaining an inch of ground with him. He is stuck in how he feels and there is no budging him. Tim is morose saying he wishes it was that easy….We can see the incredible amount hurt on his face. Telling her he just lied to two men he deeply respects. He is coming undone rapidly and Lucy can see it. I adore her putting her hands on him. Trying to right his ship.

Ground him to her in this moment. Because once again it's something she’s done so well in the past. Tim is spiraling so hard he can’t see her gesture for what it is. Tells her he just betrayed everything he thought was right about himself. *heart clutch* Lucy can’t stand him talking down about himself. Tries to interrupt but Tim won’t allow it. Lucy graciously nods and lets him get it out. Especially when he tells her how hard this is for him. She is so wonderfully understanding it makes my heart ache. Tim feels like he is a bad guy. Thought he had gotten past this and was sucked back in so easily. Truly believed he had become a better person since then. (He has) Ray was right he was gonna blow up his entire life.

He just exposed Tim for the fraud he already felt he was. Bringing his greatest sin to light. Bringing up feelings of not being deserving. Of inadequacy. His abuse background pulling into the station and not leaving. Tim is back to a place of massive self loathing. Saying he has been lying to himself for years. Thinking he’s gotten better when he hasn’t. To him he reverted back to the man he thought he left behind. Not only that he put his person. The woman he loves at risk to cover up his past. To cover up his shame. It’s hitting him like a freight train of terrible realization. Continuing on to say he can’t go back to the way it was. I was hopeful when he said ‘Right now.’ Then followed it up with maybe never….

Lucy had been nodding along. Being so wonderfully empathetic and understanding. She was with him till he said that. Then she is hit with her own terrible realization. He’s leaving her. She is losing him. In the same parking lot where he told her to take a risk. Where she expressed her concern over losing him if they did. Worried about losing the most important relationship in her life due that risk. The same spot where he told her 'Unless it is.' A giant stab to our collective shipper hearts.

It's why Lucy is in a state of utter shock. As we all were tbh. She shakily asks him if he’s breaking up with her? When he said I’m sorry. I remember having to pause. Freak out and cry. I recall chanting ‘No no no….’ To myself repeatedly. My dog was very alarmed. Because I was distraught af. I couldn't believe this was really happening. My happy place was being decimated before my eyes.

Look at the range of emotions on Tim's face before he delivers that line though. Eric you why you doing this to me? They blow this scene out the damn water. it's so visceral. and raw. He looks like he's about to have a breakdown before he delivers that line. Battling with himself about it. There's a desperate need to want to stay with her. But his self doubt and hatred wins out knowing he isn't deserving. Do I think he came out thinking he was going to do this? A little. I think the more he spoke about it and himself the decision was made. He wasn't going to be be talked off this ledge.

The way Lucy replies after this rips my heart out. This break up feels like death by a thousand paper cuts. Months later and this hurts just as much as the first time. Lucy doesn't hold back in the least. Telling Tim he doesn't get to do that. Her line about using it as an excuse is so spot on. This Ray situation has hit VERY close to home for Tim. An insanely sensitive subject for him. It's rubbed against a wound that never really healed properly. Just was buried in the back of his mind.

He doesn’t have the capacity or emotional maturity to handle it. So he ejects out as a coping mechanism. Lucy calls his ass right away for it. It’s so painful to her that he is doing this excuse. Because it feels like a crappy cheat to them. To her. It's truly a cop out and our girl deserves better than this. Especially after all they’ve been through together. All that rapport and trust they’ve built over the years. It’s an insult to who they are as a couple and the relationship they’ve developed. Sadly that all vanishes in this moment. It’s stunning Lucy and straight murdering my feels.

Her ‘That's not okay.’ is a dagger to my shipper heart. The way she continues to repeat herself cause she's in shock. Ugh.This goes down as one of the most painful breakups I've had to go through. Lucy is so upset he is going this route. Melissa had a great interview (quite a few actually.) About the lie line and using it as an excuse for Tim. She noted Lucy is upset cause how he’s acting isn’t them. That they get to have these conversations. Not only have them but recover and grow from them. It’s what she expecting from him in this moment. It's what she expected from his 5x08 Mantra going into this relationship.

She is telling him I’ve got your back. I’ve got you. What are you doing? What happened to ‘Unless it is?’ Lucy continues to vehemently disagree with him. As she should. The worst part is Tim says ‘I know.’ Like he knows what he’s doing is wrong. Knows to eject after everything isn’t ok. Yet he can’t stop himself. He is not emotionally mature enough to handle this conversation properly. Also too blinded by his own self-hatred to see the unconditional love she is showing for him in this moment. God this is painful.

Tim then comes in with the breakup line of ‘You’re an incredible person.' Lucy can’t believe this shit . She really can’t. That Tim is is doing this to her. To them. Even though Tim is being genuine with his statement. You can hear it in his voice. Doesn't do anything to soothe the wounds he's causing. Once again Melissa crushing it with the upset body language. The mannerisms are so on point. Maybe it's because I'm Italian and I use my hands when I'm upset. I do exactly what she's doing. Why I appreciate it so much. It's so real.

It's a cop out what he is doing. 'It’s not you it’s me' schtick. We see the anger building in Lucy. She can't even look at him in the second gif. For him to toss away what they have is painful enough. To do it based off a cliched excuse is destroying Lucy. Thinking what they had was worth so much more than this. Thought they worth the nasty fights. No way she knows fully what happened or she would figure out why he's really doing this. That’s what makes the rest of Lucy's replies so god damn tragic. She is trying to hold onto him for dear life. But is only being pushed away in return...

Tim continues to push forward with this breakup. Letting her know she deserves better than him. It's SO much deeper than that but it's the only way he can convey it right now. Her ‘Oh my god…’ This is her worst nightmare. Her biggest fear come to life. This is why she hesitated starting this relationship. Why she was so afraid of risking her most important relationship. It's unfolding before her eyes and she can’t stop it.

Like a bad dream she can't seem to wake up from. We all wish we could...Tim has never felt worthy of Lucy’s love, light or praise. This reaction just proves that. It's been building for a long time and this is the final result of it. It’s not logical but a trauma brain rarely is. The amount of emotional and physical abuses he endured growing up left it's mark. Has him truly convinced Lucy could never love him knowing what he did. Tim feels he does not deserve her comfort, support or love.

Punishing himself and denying what he need most because he feels unworthy. Thinks he has made a mistake so grave there is no coming back for him. No way she could love him if she knew. So he like Angela stated earlier Tim is protecting himself. Pains me to watch. Now as I've said before it's not to excuse but to explain his side of it. I understand why he's doing it even if it's fucked up.

He doesn't give Lucy much more than she deserves better. Tells her it's why he's walking away. This man feels so undeserving of the love she has to give. In his mind he thinks he’s doing her a kindness. To separate herself from such a shameful and broken man. That she could do better than him. To Tim he made the biggest sin and can’t live with himself about it. He can't envision a world where Lucy would love him through it. The tragedy is she already was in this scene.

Lucy isn’t hearing any of it. Full on panic spiral that I shared in this moment. Her ‘Don’t do this. Why are you doing this?’ Is the most soul crushing part. She can feel him slipping through her hands. Like sand rushing through her fingertips. She can’t hold onto a grain of him. Can only stand there as he gives up on them. His face in the third gif...Knife to my soul. *screams into a pillow* It's killing him to walk away from her. Eric and his expressive eyes has me bawling. The quiver in his bottom lip as well. Gah it hurts to watch them both in so much pain. It’s the way she pulls away with one hand, but is clutching his other hand for dear life, that really gets me in that last gif.

Asking him once again why are you doing this? I shared that sentiment in this moment.. Tim stands firm in his decision to end them and rip all of our hearts out. Eric had a great quote about how Tim handed this whole thing. ‘He is impulsive and he reacts instead of thinking things through. And it can come out as a bit too strong.’ He feels he is a burden Lucy therefore he is removing himself. Not thinking about the damage it’s going to do to her. The immense regret he’s going to feel when he regulates a bit more.

Something therapy has taught me is we are ruled by our nervous system. Anxiety, stress, fear etc Tim’s was haywire in this moment. All of them going off at once. Not thinking clearly. Acting out of fight or flight. He took the flight option unfortunately. The tragic way he grabs her head and gives her the saddest head kiss. Shattering all of our hearts in the process. It’s the devastated look on his face when he strokes her hair and takes off. One final gut punch from him. It's like he’s leaving behind his greatest treasure and can’t bear to be around it any longer. Lucy is clutching to him until he departs. *snifffle*

The man actually thinks she is better off without him. Truly believes that. Even if Lucy had succeeded it keeping Tim, this would've reared it’s ugly head again down the road. This breakup ruined my friggin life. I kid you not. They were my happy place. My consistent happy place. And now that was gone. It affected my mental health a little too not gonna lie. I think I was in mourning for three weeks. Honestly I still am. Low key will be till they're fixed. Those three weeks were unbearable. But also needed. Thank you again to my bestie D for being my mourning partner through out that. Kept me sane.

That being said I think this will push them in the best direction. A healthier and stronger one. I truly believe that. I recently broke up with a friend who I had been friends with for ten years. It was very hard on me but time. Boundaries were being pushed and it wasn't healthy anymore. My therapist pointed me to a wonderful book called ‘Goodbyes and good boundaries. ’ While It helped heal my heart it also has really good pieces in it. Stuff made me think of this very ep tbh. Sure that wasn't her goal LOL But my brain is always in a Chenford state of mind in some way or another.

First one that made me think of them. ‘Health cannot bond to unhealth.’ As much as it wasn’t fair for Lucy. And god it wasn’t after everything else this season. Tim was in such a radioactive state staying with her wouldn’t have worked anyway. He was radiating turmoil. Lucy can do a lot for him but not this. He NEEDED therapy so much. There are things you learn in there that only your therapist can help you with. He was unhealth and Lucy was trying to keep her empathetic healthy self to him. It was never going to work. Not unless Tim put in some work. Which he couldn't at this point in time.

“Relationship often die not because of conversations never had but rather conversations needed but never had.” Another good one made me think of them. Tim was not ready in the least for the adult conversation required of him in this moment. Or their entire relationship really. They both danced around the issues a lot. 6x02 closest we got. Even then it was one sided. Thus them dying in this moment. Despite Lucy’s damndest to keep them afloat. Remind him of what they’re fighting for. Of why they started this. This breakup was painful af. Despite how this wrecked my world it’s going to be good for them in the long run.

I will say Lucy in that last gif was all of us in that moment. It was a soul crushing moment that decimated this fandom. Still blows my mind Melissa and Eric were surprised just how insanely devastated we were. Why they did those lovely posts during the three weeks. To thank us and to hold on. Growth is coming. They’re going to be even better after this. Doesn’t mean this didn’t hurt like a SOB and won’t long after they reunite. Curse you Eric and Melissa. You are incredible to evoke such emotions out of us all.

Thank you for going through this with me again. It wasn’t easy but they always worth it. Appreciate any and all comments, likes or reblogs I get. I shall see you all in 6x07 :)

Side notes non chenford

Balian doing the creepy bed thing again. Just have to note that.

Also can’t believe they didn’t end the ep with their breakup. There is a whole minute or so of I don’t give a shit after that scene. I was so distraught they could’ve had Nolan walk into a wall and I wouldn't have noticed.

[iamnmbr3]

I hate it when people say Ginny "deserved better" when it comes to the way she was written and portrayed in canon. I'm sorry but no she didn't deserve better. She was a barely there Mary Sue character who existed primarily to be the future wife of Harry and link to him joining the Weasley family. She was also supposed to be this very powerful witch but again it never paid off. She didn't amount to anything. She turned out to be a big nothing burger of a character.

Idk. I do think she deserves better, though I definitely get where you're coming from. Ginny as a character really annoys me from book 6 on. Book 6 and 7 Ginny feels like a shallow and annoying Mary Sue and also is just kinda mean and I hate that she never gets called on her bad behavior. As soon as I feel like a story is trying to shove a character down my throat and insist that I love them and that they are flawless, I kinda feel turned off by the character and I want to hate them out of spite. Ginny's pettiness and stuff like her being pretty awful to Fleur and getting angry at Harry for even saying something nice about Fleur even though he has no romantic interest in her just really rubs me the wrong way. Especially bc these flaws are ignored and even glorified by the story. Plus there's not much there with her character.

She feels like this kinda wish fulfillment empty vessel. And I hate that she gets touted as this perfect girl for Harry when their romance feels so empty and her character feels so un-compelling - which is honestly pretty unusual because generally the characters in HP are really interesting, even the ones we only hear a little about.

Now that said, I still do actually feel that she deserves better. What do I mean by that? Well, first of all, in-universe she ends up with someone who frankly, doesn't pay much attention to her. Harry barely knows anything about Ginny and never makes her his priority. Even in the epilogue it feels like he barely even consulted her on naming their children. He never really views her as an equal or respects her opinion. And she seems to feel pressured to act a certain way to please him. Like not crying in front of him because it might bother him, but apparently having been extremely upset after their breakup according to Ron etc. I don't think they are really compatible or have a deep or substantive relationship and I think that's sad and she (or anyone in that situation) deserves better.

Also from a more Doylist POV she deserved better because her character had so much potential. I actually loved Ginny in book 5. She has a lot of growth but also still feels connected to who she was in the first 4 books. She doesn't need to be amazing and perfect at everything. She's human and real. She catches a snitch by luck because it was slow and her competitor looked away at the wrong moment - and she has the humility to notice and admit this. And it doesn't matter. Harry's professional-level good at Quidditch. She's good at other things. Also Harry and Ginny actually have a deeper and more trusting relationship in that book than in book 6, but I digress. She doesn't need to suddenly be an amazing seeker and an amazing chaser and be #NotLikeOtherGirls and super into Quidditch (even tho she wasn't in book 4) to be likable but book 6 makes her all these things and it just takes away from the real and human and flawed and empathetic and actually funny Ginny we have in book 5.

Also her whole backstory from book 2 was really promising. She and Harry could've bonded over both having had Voldemort inside their heads. She could've provided critical insights about Tom Riddle since she spent a year essentially being pen pals with him. She could've had an epic arc where in book 7 she took on a more central role in the fight and ultimately got to face her childhood monster and destroy a Horcrux. Also there was just a lot to explore with her dealing with the trauma from book 2. She could've done so much. But nope. She just gets reduced to Love Interest TM. So yeah we had this really great character who was just coming into her own in book 5 and had all this amazing potential and then gets absolutely torpedoed by JKR bc she doesn't know how to write romance. And I do think that's a shame.

Now I ship drarry and I think that's always going to be the most interesting and well set up relationship for Harry to be in. But I think Harry and Ginny getting together the way they did is realistic but I think they would then realize they aren't really a good match - they don't know each other and both are more attracted to the idea of each other than anything else. I think them realizing this and working through it would be something interesting to explore in an 8th year fic.

[stealingpotatoes]

“she’s still their princess!!! despite everything!!! even if she feels like the princess died the same day as her parents!!!” made me SOB. thinking about leia organa is the saddest thing ever it gives me psychic damage if i think abt her too long

YES LET'S SHARE THE LEIA FEELINGS. I LOVE HER SO MUCH. her level of grief is just insane to me. you cant imagine it! she didn't just lose her family and friends and home -- she lost EVERYTHING she'd ever known. every park and village and restaurant she'd ever visited at home. anything she'd ever made a memory with is just GONE. completely. its an asteroid field now. like her life before 19 never existed

but she still has to be strong. even if she can barely think of herself as the princess of a dead planet, she's still a rebellion leader. she's still general organa. she has to be strong, she has to push through her grief and destroy the monsters who did this to her people and she has to ignore the want to cry every time someone calls her princess or says im sorry abt alderaan, she has a job to do. she talks to other survivors when she finds them, and tries her best to be the princess as they discuss places and people neither of them will see again. she shoves the grief down (except on the days she just can't -- Luke always seems to know on those days, it's almost eerie) and does her best

and yeah that's a kind of grief you never even come close to getting over, but time passes. and she gains back some of what she's lost, even if its not the same -- she gets a family!! a brother, a husband, a son, and a very fluffy unofficial brother-in-law! and the resistance wins! the empire will never do what was done to her to another!! and she helps New Alderaan settle, still refusing to be princess bu hey they all think of her as princess of their small hope- and grief-stricken community. and she tells her son stories abt her planet, tells her brother about her parents, tells her husband about all the ceremonies they'd've had to do if he married her as princess. and she keeps alderaan alive in her heart (not half-killed by grief and anger anymore) and can finally feel hope (:

[damianbugs]

i often include some obscure symbolism in my fics without any real desire to point them out but i was rereading an old piece of mine and remembered one i was rather proud of;

it's from YOU MUST KNOW LIFE TO KNOW DECAY. which is a canon-adjacent story about jason's experience with rain throughout his life. it spans over many years, starting from before his parent's death, to the present as red hood.

the rain itself is the massive metaphor and motif, obviously, but within that i snuck in some other key aspects to jason's character. the one i want to talk about it from the second section of the fic (unofficially dubbed "No!" and the period in time where jason was homeless):

in this scene jason's belongings have been dumped out of his bag into the rain over a misunderstanding, amongst these scarce objects are two things — an old book belonging to Willis Todd, and a photograph of Catherine Todd (the one jason has at his place when bruce comes to find him in Batman (1940) #408).

this photo always fascinated me and so i wanted to give it its own backstory. this moment however has two stories happening. a story of sacrifice for Willis, and the story of grief for Catherine.

the book willis used to love and jason remembers him reading often is the last remaining object the boy has to his father (because most of his belongings were left with his neighbour, and jason doesn't get those back until Batman (1940) #426).

unlike a picture or a letter, this book is a vessel between them, nothing about it actually is Willis' other than the memory attached to it. a nod to the fact that even in death, he had nothing other than the memory he left with his family.

catherine however has a picture, something that is entirely hers, but even that is all it is; her face. jason is young when his mother dies, and as he grows up, he'll soon forget the memories he made with her, but he'll never forget her face because of this last photo he has. her existence, prior to the disease and suffering and death, is forever immortalised for jason. she exists only before her death.

neither willis nor catherine are ghosts that follow jason. he mourns them and misses them deeply (and this grief is the entire catalyst for why he runs away in A Death in The Family) — but they don't come to him when he's doused with fear toxin or battling exhaustion. he doesn't see them when he closes his eyes. because they are not concepts he mourns.

they are a book, a photo, people he has lost forever. jason being a young carer, would have had to watch his mother slowly die to her disease, so he knows death in its raw forms. i have spoken before about how jason views love and loss, as being very literal and blunt understandings, and it's the same here.

so, we have a book and a photograph.

the book being destroyed by the rain is another nod to the modern characterisation of Willis Todd (in both canon and fanon). of the explicitly abusive and negligent father. how his character being "ruined" is usually to paint catherine as the weak and pitiful victim of circumstance and nothing more. neither of them have any true personality other than their surface level one's, which are often classist and ignorant.

on the other hand, willis' book being ruined but protecting the photograph of catherine underneath is to represent his story in jason's life. he was an absent idea because he was working to provide for them, jason didn't really know him outside of this story, and willis dies as a mere idea for his family.

it's not enough, however. willis dies, but it's still raining. catherine's photo may have been saved by some of the rain, but jason is still homeless and he will still have to endure it alone.

the second section of this fic is the saddest one to me, because while jason is the only todd present in this scene, there are three stories being told.

[swee26oy]

I swear every time I say rhaelya stans won't get any more stupid, Until they surprise me.

Comparing Cersei and Robert's marriage to Rhaegar and Elia. Cersei was raped, beaten and called her by his love name. I can understand her resorting to Jaime. (Plus we all know this relationship existed before she married Robert so the question is even if Robert didn't treat her that badly I can tell she's still cheating on him) But Rhaelya's defense team focuses on turning traitors and dishonorable into victims. so I'd consider Cersei acting this way out of spite.

But when you glorify Rhaegar's actions towards Elia, and compare her to Robert, this is the height of iirrational it. What wrong did Elia do to Rhaegar besides doing her duty?

Oh and I know how much these people hate that phrase, and the bitter truth that no one of rhaelya stans will ever admit is that they would never like to be betrayed or abandoned. And the ridiculous argument that they don't worship House Targaryen because they hate the Greens, and Aegon II and Aemond, but they love Maegor and adore Rhaenyra and worship Daemon, and worst of all they hate Helaena,Jaehaera and Jaehaerys who did nothing.

If you think that betrayal is a good thing and there is nothing wrong with doing it. if it is for the sake of achieving your happiness. Please just get some therapy fast this is bad and dangerous. Haven't any of you watched a crime documentaries? there are a lot of crimes that happened for this stupid reason because one of these couple was feeling miserable so he decided to destroy everything, this is a selfish and unacceptable act on all levels and will never be acceptable, neither in a novel, nor historically, nor socially.

[thescarletnargacuga]

MONSTER

A HARLEQUIN AU SHOWTIME ONESHOT

Harlequin AU credit: @iamespecter @tadc-harlequin-au

Special thanks to: @sirrockem

A/N: This takes place after the events of "The way of the combat Harlequin"

WARNING: hurt/comfort, puppet nudity (not explicit)

~~~

Pomni tucked Cade into bed. "Try to get some sleep, you had a big day."

"Mom, if I see those marionettes in my dreams...I'm not too big to come sleep with you and dad, am I?" Cade looked at his mother with pleading eyes.

Pomni ran her hand comfortingly over Cade's head. "No, you're never too big to come to us for comfort. We'll always be here for you."

"Okay... goodnight, mom. Love you."

"Goodnight, Cade." Pomni gave him a kiss and left his room, leaving the door cracked to let light from the hallway inside.

Pomni slowly walked to her room. Today's events still plagued her mind. How hard she went on what she considered low level enemies. Cade's face afterwards. The very fact that she had to tell her own son that she wasn't a threat to him...

She accepted the fact that she was a killing machine a long time ago. If the idea of her directive ever bothered her, she stamped it down. It was a distraction she couldn't afford when she was on a mission.

First mission, seek and destroy....and protect? Her broken directive misguided her to the puppetmaster.

Then, missions to defeat the B.O.S.Ses. She HAD to send them to the void before they were reborn in their new forms.

But she found the moral quandary of her bloodlust harder to ignore the more enlightened she became. She was more aware of what combat felt like to her, and how much she craved it like a drug. She didn't just want to fight, she needed to. The joy she got from facing a worthy opponent was unmatched for the longest time.

Then Caine happened. His kindness, his patience, his temperament, his love for her made her feel another joy she didn't know even existed. She rationalized with herself that her urge to fight could be used only to protect and that lie became truth to her when she told it to herself enough.

She protects her city, friends, and family with her urge....but it's still an urge. She still gets antsy when she doesn't see combat for a long enough period of time. She still finds herself wishing to wander to find an even bigger and badder enemy. As much as she is her own person, she still has her vices. It wasn't until her son feared for his life in front of her that she realized how toxic it could be if left unchecked.

Pomni shut herself in the master bedroom and took off her belt, holding the sheathed sword gingerly as if it would come to life and bite her. "I'm being ridiculous...." She tried to tell herself, but her hands trembled. She dropped the sword on the floor next to her side of the bed and sat down, head in her hands. "I can control it..."

She didn't look up when Caine entered the room, dropping his cane and coat. "Ugh...those marionettes caused more trouble than they were worth. Eight puppets need to be rebuilt and revived, and security demands for the east side have gone up. We're spread thin enough as it is." He flopped on the bed next to Pomni. "How's Cade?"

Pomni took out her hair tie, letting her longer hair drape her shoulders. "Better...we had a talk."

"....are you okay?" Caine sat up, hearing the despondent tone in her voice.

Pomni took a moment to answer. "...Cade wasn't afraid of the marionettes. He was afraid of me." She held herself in an attempt to self-soothe. "You should have seen his eyes..."

Caine wrapped an arm around Pomni, holding her close next to him. "He's never seen you in actual combat. It was just a lot for him to take in."

"He wouldn't let me touch him!" Pomni almost sobbed. "He thought I would hurt him next, like I was some out of control monster!"

"Hey..." He gently held her chin. "Look at me...you are not a monster. Your detective is not your fault, and you've made leaps and bounds to use it the way you see fit, not the person who programmed you. You are Pomni: the woman I love, the mother of our child, the protector of the City of Circuits... Not one of those things makes you a monster."

Pomni had no more tears. She was spent; physically and emotionally. "Enjoying combat does, wanting it as much as I do..."

"Were you happy to see the marionettes today?" Caine asked seriously.

"....no."

"You wanted to protect Cade and the city?"

"...yes."

"Pomni, you're not what you think of yourself. Cade was frightened, anyone would be, but he doesn't hate you. No one hates you."

Pomni gave a dry laugh. "Jax might..."

Caine chuckled a little. "Jax is a special case." He looked Pomni over, she had cleaned herself off a bit before seeing Cade, but there were still dried oil stains on her clothes and skin. "Let me get you clean. You'll feel a little better refreshed."

Pomni had no energy to argue. She let Caine lead her to the bathroom and remove her clothing. Caine ran a bath as hot as Pomni could stand and gestured for her to get in while he got a cleanser and washcloth.

Pomni sank into the steaming water up to her shoulders and closed her eyes. The stress of the day melted away as her body relaxed. She let out a content sigh as Caine gently bathed her. His ungloved metal hands felt cool against her synthetic skin. Pomni leaned her head back to rest against the edge of the tub.

Caine gently scrubbed away the oil, his movements deliberate but soothing. When he finished, he focused on her hair. He brushed it out, removing the tangles and wayward strands. He loved to pamper her like this, especially when she needed it like today.

Caine left a quick kiss on Pomni's forehead. "I'll let you soak. Let me know when you're ready for bed." He got up to leave but Pomni grabbed his hand.

"Join me." As much as Pomni enjoyed the water by herself, she didn't want to be alone right now.

Caine didn't need any convincing. He stripped down and eased himself into the bath behind Pomni. He held her in his lap, leaving small kisses on her neck and shoulders. "I love you." He whispered to her.

"I love you, too." Pomni mumbled back sleepily. Between the warm water and Caine's embrace, she felt relaxed enough to rest. "I'm sorry..."

Caine furrowed. "For what?"

"That you still have to deal with my bullshit."

Caine smiled warmly and kissed her cheek. "My love, I married you. I took a vow to deal with your bullshit for the rest of my life."

Pomni smiled a little. "My condolences."

"Keep them, just give me everything else." He hugged her tighter.

"All yours." Pomni yawned. "Thank you, for this."

"My pleasure, dear." Caine held her as she drifted off. He enjoyed the bath for a little longer before blinking them both into the bed, dry as a bone. He tucked Pomni in and held her to him as he found sleep.

[dross-the-fish]

I see weird takes in fandoms all the time and never really feel the need to comment but there is one that crops up every now and again that rubs me the wrong way. The idea that Christine somehow deserves Erik's reaction when she takes off his mask or even that she's shallow, cruel, or somehow the abusive one in their dynamic. It's not a prevalent take, at least not like it was back in 2012 when I first joined the phandom, I don't think, but it lends itself to the completely backwards idea that Christine is somehow wrong for not immediately accepting Erik.

People who think that Christine is the problem here really don't grasp how utterly destroyed her reality was the moment the mask came off. A reality that Erik had built for her with his whole "Angel of Music" ruse. I kind of wish these people would put themselves in her shoes for a moment. Imagine someone grieving the loss of a beloved parent and suddenly a "guardian angel" shows up allegedly sent by that parent to watch over them. Wouldn't anyone be thrilled that their parent some how exists and is able to send an envoy to communicate with them? Especially if they were young, I can easily see how someone consumed by grief would latch on to that. It wouldn't take much for this new entity to become a source of comfort and security, something they grow to love and trust as a connection to the only family they had.

Now imagine one day they find out that it was all a lie. Their parent is just gone, has been the whole time, they never sent any angel, there's no hope or evidence that some part of them ever had the ability to reach out. All of that comfort and safety is just gone. It was never there. For Christine there's a stranger here named Erik who may very well be dangerous and who definitely doesn't have entirely parental feelings towards her. I can't view this as anything but terrifying and it's difficult for me to envision a version of Christine that wouldn't feel like her father had just died all over again.

I also believe that Erik knows this and on some level regrets it throughout the book, culminating in him letting Christine go in the end. I can even buy that his intentions to be Christine's "Angel" weren't initially malicious but by the time he realized it could only end badly he was already in too deep. Erik made some really poor choices and the sad reality is that he probably didn't think he had any choices to begin with. This doesn't mean he gets a pass but it does highlight how tragic the story is and I think he is deserving of some sympathy for his circumstances. I just don't think that it's Christine's obligation to give it to him and her showing him grace and offering a gesture of love at the end is incredibly generous of her. I think when that subset of the fandom that is critical of Christine insist that she should have just accepted Erik they are really downplaying how meaningful her actions are. Erik cause a lot of harm, more harm to her than to anyone else (with the exception of the people he outright killed) and her forgiveness and compassion meant as much to him as it did because he's aware that he hadn't earned that from her. That is why it is meaningful that she kissed him, cried with him and he let her go. Because it broke the cycle. To show him kindness at a time when he least deserved it is real mercy and he understood that. Anyway, I think that's enough serious fandom talk from this fish, back to my drabbles and doodles.

[yennas-stuff]

elriels seem completely incapable of making any arguments for their ship on a meta level. like all of their arguments always rely on picking apart the text in a very literal manner, misrepresenting the text out of context, or just straight up biased takes on what the characters are thinking/desire (like idc what elain wants.... she's a character walking in whatever direction SJM wants). never in all my time lurking have i seen a single compelling meta argument from them outside of "elriel has already been set up", and "it would make no sense to casual readers if elriel didn't happen", and my favorite outright false claim that they love, "sjm said the series is about the archeron sisters".

idk how they champion so hard for a ship that they can't even make a good narrative argument for--because it doesn't make any sense from a storytelling perspective and they either know it or are too ignorant on the technicalities of writing a novel to understand that.

they take people's arguments like mine (saying idc what elain wants) and misdirect people's attention by calling it misogyny or whatever other stupidity they spew, and COMPLETELY miss the point everyone's making that it's not that we "don't care about elain" and "hate elain" but that we understand that narratives need to have a little something called dramatic irony, which only exists if characters are in opposition in some way (elain resisting the mating bond).

elain is not a victim of people's misogyny, she's a fictional character who some people would find less interesting if her endgame romance was as simplistic as "she likes azriel so she's going to end up with azriel", and all the drama for the book has to come from outside factors like Rhys keeping them apart... and... what? Breaking the mating bond before they can be together? Even though they already were happily going to touch each other seemingly without any regard to the mate bond/lucien being around? The book would be as big of a disaster as CC3 because it would rely completely on external plots... but that's just my biased opinion on a different topic, anyway.

It just doesn't make sense and it would be completely random for them to end up together, narratively. I know they argue the opposite but they just can't back it up with any logical arguments. I think that's why it confuses me that there are so many of them... i guess lotssss of people really read at a very surface level depth

First of all, thank you for the message!

Agreed about their theories. They also never make sense to me and seem to be based more on vibes than anything else. I could see how, to some people, their aesthetic can be appealing, but personally, I don't enjoy soft girl/bad boy trope. But it doesn't matter much since it's about what sjm enjoys and gravitates towards... and the whole point of the series is LIKE CALLS TO LIKE. It's about choosing a partner to match your energy, to help you meet your fullest potential.

We HAVE enough evidence to say that Azriel wouldn't let Elain do much about her powers. He speaks for her. He wants to duel her mate, which shows us he doesn't understand her on a deeper level. Elain also couldn't help Azriel heal and get better mentally. He wouldn't share his darkness with her. He doesnt plan any future together.

Is that the forbidden romance they are fighting so hard for? Lucien is so far away, respecting her boundaries. Rhys has already promised to keep Elain safe if she decided to reject the bond. So, who would they be fighting? What's forbidden about it?

You are so right that it reads very surface level. Their possible plot seems to be rejecting the bond, and what else ???? Koshei is connected to Lucien and BOE. So they would completely destroy Lucien and their connection to human lands. He will not just get over it and be with Vassa (lol). Mating bonds are a serious business. ONLY THE IMPORTANCE AND INEVITABILITY OF MATING BONDS HAD 4 BOOKS OF BUILD-UP. Not their ship.

Do they want the repeat of Nesta's warrior training arc? How would spy training look like? Didn't Az himself say it's boring? You just sit and observe...

Elain's visions seemed to be connected to Lucien's closeness (coz acowar). Also, Cassian's presence grounded Nesta and helped her out. Wouldn't Lucien be needed for Elain to wake up her visions back? Az would just sit in the corner and silently fume and spiral about not being her mate...

It's just... how can they not see that they are fighting for the losing side. And what for? Some smut scenes? That's what ao3 is for, babes. And they will get canon Azriel smut. They dont need to worry. Just not with Elain. (Gwyn seems more likely to keep up with his stamina. They do work out a lot, lmao.)

[13thdoctorposts]

What are you thoughts on the relationship that 13 and the Master have?

(asking because your thoughts on everything are so insanely interesting to read)

Thank you for reading my thoughts because they are verbose. lol. so I appreciate you taking the time. 🙏

Complex would be putting it mildly. 😂

First, for me, SpyMaster comes after Missy. The way 13/SpyMaster plays out is a continuation of the 12/Missy dynamic.

At the end of 12's run, when Missy and the Master kill Bill, this sets in motion the way we see 13 engage with SpyMaster. 12 wanted to help bring Missy to the good side. 13 could not care if the Master lives or dies, let alone if he joins the good side. She doesn’t consider their friendship worth anything anymore. Any second chances he has are well in the rearview. In her mind, their relationship is past any point of fixing. But, at the end of Spyfall, when he delivers that message, she still does not care about him or their relationship. But, she wants to know what he knows.

From the SpyMaster view, there is a constant undertone of something more than what he’s saying. He wants to be seen by the Doctor, for example, on top of the Eiffel Tower. When she asks why he’s doing all this, he responds: “To get your attention.” He also hates who he is. It’s because he knows they were so close to being the friends they used to be. But, he destroyed that with the knowledge he found and the actions he took in destroying Gallifrey. Between that and Bill. He knows he'll never get back to where 12 and Missy were. That's what he likely wanted at the start of his new life.

It feels like he loves her so much he hates her and hates her so much because he loves her, super toxic. lol.

My headcanon goes like this: Spy regenerates from Missy. He isn’t the evil villain we see now. But, early in his new journeys, he finds out about the timeless child. It breaks his brain. To Missy, she and the Doctor were equals. This is a key part of Missy's identity. The companions were pets, nothing more. Missy is his only true companion and everyone else pales in comparison. Spy would have thought the same. Then, he finds out about the timeless child. It turns out they aren’t equals at all. What makes him special, the ability to regenerate, comes from her. In his anger, and having his core belief ripped from him, he relapses on being an evil dude. He then nukes Gallifrey.

To him, being evil is like a drug. He wanted to be good. But, getting this information about the timeless child shattered his self-image. It also shattered the way he saw the Doctor and their relationship. It broke his brain and his spirit. Everything he thought he knew about himself and her was a lie. He thought he knew her better than anyone in the universe. But, that isn’t even nearly true. There is so much shattering in his self-image and their relationship. It's the thing he holds most dear, even if he never says it. The pain makes him default to his worst parts.

He was mad at the elites of Gallifrey for what they did to him. But, he was also mad for what they did to the Doctor, even if that was at a deeper level. It's one thing for him to hurt or exploit the Doctor, but another for someone else to do it. After he destroyed Gallifrey for what they did to him and the Doctor, he found that it didn’t satisfy him. It didn't ease his pain. So, the next step was to go after the Doctor, to make her feel as small, used, confused, and beaten as he was. To make her like him, to try and make them equals again. That's why he wanted her to push that button in TTC. It would take them all out. Then, they would have both nuked Gallifrey. They would be equal in that.

He thought he would kill her or they would both die. Then maybe the pain and rage and self-hate he felt would end. It wouldn't, of course. But, he was looking for a fix.

He’s mad at her because she made him who he is. He can't stand that a part of her is why he exists, as he says in the episode. It's why he feels pain. At this point, he’s convinced himself it’s her fault. But, deep down he knows that they used her. He doesn't have anyone else to direct his anger at, so he directs it at her. He’s probably convinced himself that she always knew something was different about her. His pain is fueling so much toxicity. He can't break out of the cycle.

13 is feeling her own trauma and pain from their last interaction. And from the knowledge he gave her and how he delivered it. By the time we get to the Power of the Doctor, she couldn’t be more over him. At this point, he's killed Bill and nuked Gallifrey. He's been a jerk about telling her about her past in the most painful way possible. None of it was her fault, but he had to inflict more pain on her. She can't be bothered with him, but she has no choice. He's continuing to play games. Then he does the most violating heinous thing possible. He regenerates her out of existence and takes over.

13 has had to deal with unmatched violation. In her mind, it could have been her and the SpyMaster (or her and Missy) against the universe. But, the SpyMaster chose violence. 

She's done with him. But, the relationship still holds some meaning to her. She knows it's toxic and wants out so much. But, he just keeps coming back.

13 can be toxic by herself. She deals with trauma in the worst ways. If she just let Yaz in, things could have been so different. However, her toxicity doesn't help their situation. She can be petty too, but it's nothing compared to what he does to her.

They have loved each other their whole lives. But, the Master in all forms struggled each time to choose the Doctor over being evil. A couple of times the Master has. But, by 13/SpyMaster, those have been rare, and the pain too raw. Although she may still love him somewhere deep down, she knows he is bad for her. He is even worse for her companions. That's why she wants nothing more to do with him. I don't think he wants anything more to do with himself. That's why we see him say "don’t let me go back to being me" during the degeneration. But, when he does, he still has to end her like it's a compulsion. Because of his need to make them equals and if it's his time to go then it has to be her time too.

I'm quite long-winded and I'm not 100% sure I've answered what you've asked. Essentially, they are in the universe's most toxic relationship, and she wants out but he won't let her go. Pain, hurt, rage, and love fuel their relationship in the worst ways imaginable.

If I haven't made sense, feel free to ask more questions. I adore how complex, broken, and deep in emotion their relationship is, so I could talk about it for days... obviously 👆🤣

[marbleboa]

Mukai Speculation: The Hell is Up With the Divine Wood

So. I've been thinking about potential avenues for Mukai's backstory lately. She is one of those characters that is given very little characterization-wise, however her very existence in her role as a Scar is one of those things that give a lot of people pause. Often with the question 'hey uh what's that 11 year old doing there'.

As such, I thought I'd put down some rambles about the matter here!

One common route I've seen taken is that Mukai was kidnapped by Claw, and it makes sense! Claw’s basically got child kidnapping down to a science, and apparently brainwashing to boot.

Though in regards to the later, I was thinking about Shou's comments in the 7th Division Arc immediately after Ishiguro suggests brainwashing the protags. He seems to imply the process dulls an esper's abilities, turning them into trash/mindless slaves. As such, I think it's safe to assume none of the scars are brainwashed in an unnatural sense, but rather succumbed to Claw's ideals due to personal weakness and/or vulnerability

Back to Mukai, if brainwashing wasn't in the picture I'm thinking either she was kidnapped at a young enough age where under Claw's indoctrination her cooperation never was an issue, or she entered the organization a different way. But if she wasn't kidnapped, then how did this kid end up in the role of a Scar? Well, I'm basing my speculation here primarily on this scene from the manga:

Quite the info, as it both comes out of nowhere and is never mentioned again. Not unheard of especially for the World Domination Arc in the manga, where the readers get so much thrown at them at once. On its own, there's only a bit we can glean from Mukai's reaction: 1. this was a place she had a lot of attachment to, and 2. it was important enough to be noted by Claw and later destroyed after the 7th Division's defection.

The whole 'divine wood' thing brings to mind an element of spirituality, some spot of nature that's deemed as sacred. This brings me further back to the beginning of WD arc. Prior to Toichiro’s speech, the other Division Leaders are kind enough to grant us some exposition on the extent of Claw’s influence:

So. Religious cults. It paints an interesting, unseen picture of these different organizations vying for a place at the table when Claw takes over the world. Thinking about it, I had an idea--what if Mukai came from one of these cults?

Probably a bit of a stretch, but I could imagine those special tree(s) she talked about being one of the main fixtures of the group's beliefs, something believed to aid those who paid tribute to it(you know how we love tree cults here). A place that Mukai was taught to be special ever since she was little...it's no wonder her powers would resonate with objects made from there, belief's a powerful thing. And if it was involved in Claw, they would certainly have information about all that on record to dispose of it later.

What's more, it seems pretty common for upper level cults to make things a family affair--and child with powers like that would be sure to grab attention. Money's well and good of course, but what better way to make your organization stand out than to give up an offering of power instead? What if Mukai was given to Claw willingly? And Mukai, well, she's not made privy to any of that of course. But with all the praise for her powers and the promise of freedom to use them, plus her family's pride...it's not hard to imagine how she'd be easily entangled like that.

In regards to her post-Claw life, I think this could open up some interesting possibilities for different dynamics and conflicts to say the least. It's of course a horrible thing for a child to be taken from their family, but maybe in that situation there could be a bittersweet reunion in the end. For a child to grow up realizing they were given up as a bargaining chip, one that the other side didn't even end up wanting to keep(marked as damaged goods, remember?)...that has to be a trial on its own.

Obviously I doubt this is what ONE intended to be gleaned from the whole thing--but hey, it's interesting to think about.

[kerubimcrepin]

Liveread: Dofus tome 2 – Le fil pourpre

I didn't know about this until the post by @julith-jurgen that included art from this book, but as it turns out — Kerubim makes an appearance in one of the Dofus choose your own adventure novels.

I will say: I couldn't find PDFs for myself, or any other way to read these books... For a second, I thought all hope is lost... However, fortunately, I am a member of a discord that frequently runs games using these books, translating them along the way. So, while reading this post, you will see quotes from that discord translation.

(It feels a bit corny, but shout out to @uelman for running those games and translating this! ;><)

You ask a passerby how to reach Kerub Crepin's shop. The young man replies that the shop is at the Ecalfip statue's square. It'll probably still be open, even at this late hour.

The novels, as far as I am aware, are set at the time of the Dofus MMOs. This part in particular references the old layout of Astrub city in Dofus MMO as well.

Before a major update, there were various classes' gods' statues around the city, and Kerubim's was right across the Ecaflip one.

You're looking forward to meeting this unique figure described by Meriana. According to the magician, Kerub is a retired hero and a great storyteller... and he's in possession of an item vital in the quest for the Crimson Dofus.

Meriana is a major character in the Dofus MMO, and someone who helps you find all the Dofus in the game. She is an Enutrof demigoddess who possesses a true fortune of knowledge and books.

In the game, Kerubim says that the two of them are friends.

You arrive to a square with an imposing white stone statue of the god Ecaflip. Nearby, a sign in the shape of a bow meow's head swings in the night's breeze. It points to the store of Kerub Crepin, one of the most renowned adventurers in the World of Twelve.

Considering the fact that Joris sends the player, in-game, directly to Kerubim, and says literally nothing about them being related, I like to think that people not into adventurer/immortal/political gossip, knowing that Kerubim and Joris are related is like, "below the surface of the water" knowledge.

Knowing that Atcham exists is "middle of the iceberg" knowledge, and knowing how exactly they're related and who is older, is the "deep ocean" level of knowledge, respectively.

You've never seen such a bric-a-brac. There's vials, flasks, vases, bottle and pots. Old dusty books are piled up everywhere. Some weapons are displayed on the walls. Skulls stare at you with their empty eye sockets, while chests, trunks and cases hide other objects.

Oldass books and creepy decorations are apparently a familial trait.

You climb up the wooden stairway. You hear someone talk in a hoarse voice. "...we're starting to have too much dust around here, Luis. I know you're very touchy on this subject, but just a single good wiping with a thaumaturgical feather duster would be enough... Luis? Ah look at that, the bugger fell asleep! It's not that late, I'd say..."

KERUBIM USE YOUR CHANCE. CLEAN UP WHILE HE'S SLEEPING. KERUBIM——

You enter a room with shelves in front of all the walls. An old white furred Ecaflip is sitting on an armchair, steaming mug in hand. He smiles at you from ear to ear. "Welcome! Come closer, don't be scared. Oh, I see you're accompanied by a spirit... not a violent one, I hope? As long as he knows to keep himself in check and doesn't make my furniture fly around, he can haunt the house freely. So, what can I do for you?" You introduce yourself shortly. "A pleasure. I'm Kerub Crepin, humble owner of the most amazing magic shop in the whole Krosmoz. No matter what you're looking for: you will find it here. Let me guess... You're searching for a magical weapon able to destroy your enemies? I have an inflatable sword right here, a wholly original model that was a huge hit at the latest armourer convention. It comes with a pack of patches. Do you want a way to bring your friend back to life? I think I still have an Erzal potion. Although, I have to warn you that it has some secondary effects, and if his original body was in a bad shape, the result could be... unexpected."

He is never beating those necromancy allegations... But either way, I am pretty sure the Ezral potion here might be this?

Very interested at first, Oskar quickly realises that Kerub's potion is not the solution to his problem. As for you, you tell the Ecaflip that you were sent by the magician Meriana. "Meriana? Haha! How's the old witch doing? It's been a long time since she passed by Astrub. She can't stand crowds. She's always been like that... So, tell me, what Dofus are you after? Emerald, Ochre, Turquoise?" You reply that you're after the Crimson Dofus. "Oh, Ignemikhal's egg! You know, I had it in my hands a long time ago... but I'd need many days just to tell this story, and no doubt you're in a hurry. You've got a long way ahead of you... and it's not going to be a straight line, oh no! You'll have to adventure into the Minotoror's labyrinth... there's a bloody stroll waiting for you there." Kerub drinks a sip of his mug, then stands up and asks you to follow him. "I have a debt towards Meriana, so I will help you. You're lucky, I have exactly what you need. Come, follow me to the attic."

Love how casual he is about asking which Dofus is being sought after, here. Like this is just another weekday for him.

You follow the old Ecaflip and start climbing up the tight red wood stairs. You mention to your host that not that long ago, you too were a Kerub. "Haha, you were part of Incarnam's guards, that right? Many years ago, I served amongst the ranks of the Kerub's militia. At the time, they weren't named that... they took the Kerub name in my honour, to thank me from saving the celestial island from a great danger. It's an incredible story. It all began when...-" "Eh, sorry to interrupt you, Mister Crepin, but... are you renting the loft to anyone?" Oskar, who silently floated behind you, points to a ray of light coming from the floorboard above your head. "Judging from the creaks I'm hearing... I'd say you have a visitor." Kerub frowns. Quickly, he opens the attic's trap door and jumps up with the dexterity of a bow meow. You quickly climb up the last steps.

This part references the Celestial Kerubim Militia, which are a faction you join during the tutorial of the Dofus MMO.

In the game he also speaks of having been the reason the militia is named that way, and you can see a framed photo/painting of him in their headquarters.

The same image can be seen in the shop in Wakfu MMO's times. As far as I know, the Kerubim Militia may not exist by these times.

Your untimely interruption surprises the attic's inhabitants: the moumouses scarper, the arachnees skedaddle... and four masked individuals are caught in the act. The most surprised one is a red-haired female Rogue: she stays still for a few seconds before an open trunk, lit by the moonlight coming from the skylight. In her black gloved hand, there's a red ball of yarn. Kerub proclaims his outrage at this home invasion. "Hey, give that back, it's mine! Luis, wake up, you old shack!" The redhead makes sign to her sidekicks. "Riko, Lequin, Chypel! Take care of these idiots while I grab the scarper powder!" The three Rogues take the offensive. Kerub grabs a broom lying around. "I'll take her of the lady! I'll leave the other scoundrels to you!"

Hey Keke. Look at me, Keke.

Are you sure about that??

(I'm joking. This book takes place centuries after the show. I doubt these rogues in Dofus times, and Remingron in Wakfu times, care about something that happened so long ago.)

Meanwhile, Kerub seems to have the situation under control: perched at the edge of the skylight, he uses his broom to reflect every single explosive projectile the Rogue leader throws at him. Realising that her way out is blocked, the redhead retreats towards the stairs... but Kerub doesn't plan to let her escape! He puts a spoke in her wheels, rather literally throwing his broom at her legs, making her lose her footing... and the crimson ball of thread she held in her hand. The ball rolls at your feet. You pick it up, challenging the thieves to come take it back.

Not going to lie... Kerubim beating someone with a broom is something I didn't know I needed, until now.

Suddenly, the flooring begins to rise. The attic's trapdoor slams closed. Kerub doesn't seem unnerved, on the contrary. "Finally, you woke up! Come on, Luis, let's get to it, time to clean this up!" The Rogue leader shouts in anger. She throws a glass marble at the floor. A thick mist overruns the room. You can't see anything anymore. Kerub is overtaken by a coughing fit. "Khoff, khoff! Luis, do something! Khoff!" The round skylight extends and expands, letting the smoke out. You barely notice a vague silhouette jumping over you... and going out the window open into the starry sky. "Khoff! She escaped! Agh, that vixen!" You look outside. The redhead landed on the neighbouring roof. She looks back to you and curses at you with her fist to the clouds. "You'll pay for this... We'll meet again!" Then, she disappears into the night. You hear an explosion behind you. The three Rogues managed to open the trapdoor with sheer brute strength. "C'mon guys, we're breaking out!" The ruffians rush down the stairs at full speed. You're about to run after them, but Kerub grabs you by the back of your neck. "Let them flee! What matters, is that the scoundrels left empty-handed, without their loot!" The old Ecaflip points at the ball in your hand. It shines in a bright crimson light.

[imagines Kerubim stopping Joris and Atcham from running after some rogues that broke in and beating them to death] [smiles]

"This ball of yarn is not an ordinary one. It used to be the property of the Ecaflip god. The Big Tease collects balls, it's one of his hobbies. He even invented a game with flabby balls... but this one is very peculiar. It is said that the crimson thread that composes it is tied to the tapestry of three Norrai, the fate weavers. It will guide you through the Minotoror's labyrinth." You thank Kerub for his gift, and ask him he he has any idea of who the red-haired thief could be. "Haha, she caught your eye too? Well, I think I've seen her near the old burnt-down church... she was with a group of fairly sinister individuals." "I know her," intervened Oskar, "Her name is Odetta. She's the right hand woman of Han Reddun, one of the leaders of Astrub's crime syndicate. I already dealt with Reddun before... he tried to drown me in a barrel of alcohol mixed with water. Such a crime against Astrub's fine beer... Don't you see? It's the sign of an insufferable cruelty." "I don't really see it, no," replies Kerub shrugging his shoulders. "I only drink mimilk, or exceptionally, a glass of Chichala. In fact, now that I said that..."

Odetta is a real NPC in the MMO, and she does hang out inside an old burnt-down church.

What is more scary to me is that this implies that Kerubim really did cut down on the alcohol after his turbulent youth and being shown with a beer or drunk every other episode. Therapy real???

The old Ecaflip turns to you. "Something tells me your quest won't be a walk in the park, my young friend, and that you'll need a little help... Follow me, Luis will take care of putting things back into place here." As you walk down, you ask who is this famous Luis he keeps mentioning. "Well he's the soul of the house, he is! Luis is a Shushu, a demon if you like. He haunts this place since forever. No doubt what explains why he behaves like a dragon-pig... Ouch! I'm kidding, Luis, no need to put splinters under my paws!" Back at his shop, Kerub rummages through a big golden chest. "Alright, let's see, where did I put it... Make yourself comfortable, it may take a while. Have a candy, there's a whole bowl. No, not this... Did you know you'll need two relics to reach the centre of the labyrinth? I don't have it in stock anymore, else I'd give you a friend's discount. Oh, I thought I had thrown away this old thing... Oof, I'm starting to regret this. I have to tidy all of this one day... Ah, here it is. A flask of Chichala! Although, now that I think about it, you could also use this Matataure cape... or the Unlucky's Joker!" Kerub puts three items before you: a green flask, a deep red cape, and a playing card.

Kerubim is just like me fr when it comes to cleaning. "Ooof I'm starting to regret this, I have to tidy all of this one day" he will not tidy all of this. at any point in time.

This brings my quick little book-review/liveblog to a close. Overall, a very cute cameo. Especially for me, since I am always very interested in Dofus MMO times, when it comes to Kerubim, Joris, and Atcham. (as if you couldn't tell from the 10k word fanfic i wrote. Dofus MMO lore has me bewitched heart and soul ok?)