#sorry if it was just rambling its hard to explain their dynamic in my mind

[shovson]

synth this is stranger anon! I just finished reading you stopped by my house and totally get crazy about it... first i think george should be seeking for helps he's crying and screaming in max's house but then max is getting crazy for him too. theyare so abnormal to each other

at the same time max is just pure loving like?? innocently thinking they had something after spent a week doing george. oh. luckily lando and dan are so nice. damn why they didn't fuck again max must hurt so bad (wondering that as a george fan?). i think the whole thing is george's fault and wanna see how he will handle this between his gf and max. pls tell me it'll be a happy ending!>?!

HEELLO AGAIN ANON I HOPE YOU'RE WELL!!!!!!! I KNOW THIS IS MESSED UP THIS IS HOW I FOUND OUT ALL MY FICS ARE STILL PUBLIC ADSKJHSFDKJFDHJJHJ NOOOOO. i thought i did the privating correctly but i fucked up LOL

BUT IM GLAD YOU LIKE IT SO MUCH <3 AND I APPRECIATE YOU READING IT HAHA

really putting them both thru it all and for what? u know fun fact it was going to end at chapter one with GEORGE JUST WALKING AWAY LOL but a lot of people were like "BRO U CANT LEAVE IT THERE" which is....fair

spoilers under read more

i think theyre both looking to preserve themselves in a way. i think its all good then they fuck and its like. okay so max is looking to get with someone (in my mind its also an ex, but maybe even danny) and uses george as a crutch despite their little interaction. then george thinks too impulsively and also uses max as a temporary solution. then HE GETS WITH THE GIRLFRIEND AGAIN......then he gets scared and doesn't tell max until its too late. so now he's gotta apologize

(im kind of thinking of imola 2021 where george took full responsibility for the incident w valtteri after reflecting for a bit! he made a bad judgement but fixed it immediately!)

then max resents george (because he got attached) but refuses to talk about it with george. george is willing to take accountability but max knows it'll hurt george even more if he doesn't even engage with that idea. smh my head . the pettiness is unreal. he's literally willing to kill them both if it means he "wins"; that george can never feel comfort in his own relationship again, that george is berated for what max thinks is the wrong decision, and that george will stay with max (even if in a way that is so hateful). love makes people crazy.

danny + lando trying to mediate makes me giggle. lando is really like "im sure the week with george will be fine" then comes back to fire and hell on earth. but yeah #dandobesties4eva

ANYWAYS stranger anon it will be happy dont worry i wont say how it resolves but....everything is good in da end ^_^ i drew a picture for it and everything before deleting it haha!! thank you again stranger anon!!! i really do appreciate when people comment and send asks about my stuff <3

[strangestofthings12]

This is going to be a very rambling and venty post cause im tired and annoyed and honestly am just using this to vent my anger/hurt. there is going to be stuff that can maybe be seen as anti tommy/bucktommy (please dont tell me a ship name to put i dont care about if they do have an agreed upon ship name right now) so if you dont want that please just move on. i dont want to fight i just want to yell into the void on a stupid throw away account so i dont bring my negativity stew and come out on my main blog where i just want to enjoy my stuff and just keep happy energy. I dont normally post and try and just find someone who explains it better because im not great and getting what im saying across or understood the way i want, so please bear with me. With that said i will move on to what i want to say

Okay so i have been watching 9-1-1 for years and i love and adore it. Its characters and dynamics and i have always loved found family. Now i will admit that i started watching it thinking that Buck and Eddie were a couple and had a son so i was kinda watching for it. Do i think if i didn't start watching thinking that i would ship them still yes 100%. I have always loved their relationship and i have loved watching both Buck and Eddie grow and start to be happy while also having each others back even at the worst times. Sometimes if i think to hard about Eddie and start crying cause I'm very normal about this show and it characters. Now Eddie is my favorite character in the show and at least in my top five overall favorite characters. I love him and his development and i adore seeing how much he does to just do right by Chris even when he messes up you can tell how much he adores that boy and how badly he wants to give Chris the best life possible. I could write essays about Eddie Diaz trying to explain how much i love him and why and i think words would run out before i could finish making people understand. Buddie is my favorite ship (sometimes second depending on my mood. i would say sorry but Henren and Madney will always be amazing ships and sometimes i just cant stop think about them)(Sorry Bathena i love you too i swear i just cant decide if i wanna kiss athena or be adopted by bobby and athena:( Its confusing) and has been for quite awhile and is one of my overall favorites and its one of my comfort ships.

With that context when bi Buck happened i was so insanely happy and i wouldnt shut up about it. it made me sick. i was so happy for Buck and while i think a part of me will always be a little sad Eddie wasnt his first kiss with a guy i dont think either of them are ready for that. i also understand that it wouldnt make sense for how the story is going right now. Now i have nothing against bucktommy in the show. I have watched the kiss scene and sobbed to much to pretend like i hate them or even dislike them. However I genuinely dont care about Tommy. Hes kinda bland and i forget about him half the time and before they brought him back i completely forgot his name. in my mind he was the one that wasnt as much of an asshole to chim and hen as the other two assholes which wasnt saying a lot. Now I dont dislike tommy nor am i going to act like hes irredeemable because neither Chim nor Hen seem to think hes still that guy and while they dont seem super close they seem to get along so clearly, he's not like that anymore. I have nothing that makes me dislike him nor do I like him. He's just there. He's just the guy buck kissed. Thats all he means to me. I would give up his screen time for Ravi or May or Karen in a heartbeat. because i love them cause they mean something to me. I don't think i thought about the fact that people might actually like him especially not more than EDDIE.

This is where the context matters cause i am to my core a one ship per person girly. I might see a ship and people who like it and even think thats not a terrible ship but i will still only look at content for my ship for that person (ie. i ship Destiel (dont say anything bad about them ill cry<3) but i can see the way someone would also ship Dean and Benny or crowley or Cas and Crowley or Mick but i will ignore the ship and move on and look at more Dean and Cas). normally i will just ignore the ship and move on because im not who its for. If it gets annoying in my tag or anything like that ill block it or whoever is annoying me cause its not a them problem that i dont want to see it. When i start to have a problem is when multiple people arent tagging right for whatever reason or people who are being rude about the ship i like because of their ship. When I started seeing Bucktommy stuff more and more in the 9-1-1 tag i went to the buddie tag cause i dont want to see them. my problem is that when im reading on AO3 and click on a fic tagged Buddie where bucktommy get married. it was literally just hurting Eddie. There was stuff before like id be scrolling though the buddie tag here and see someone saying that Tommy is a better character then Eddie and saying that they hope bucktommy is endgame. Whatever block and move on. Just like always but then people who have shipped buddie for years who ive seen talk about them are suddenly saying that they like bucktommy better. People who started watching because of bucktommy saying they dont like Eddie. People are going to have different opinions but it still bugged me. and then i read that and i was just hurt because it was tagged happy ending and i cannot fathom ever thinking Eddie hurting and pining is a happy ending. So i started to get more annoyed and i hate when that happens especially with a show i love and a character i dont dislike so i tried to just move on but more and more people are taking about it then i saw someone saying that they wanted eddie to die so buck and tommy can have Chris.

I just hate that so many people are jumping on the bucktommy train and saying that they like it better than buddie something that is so good and sweet or saying that they like Tommy more than Eddie. I just dont get it cause Tommy is boring. like yeah we now some about him and he flies a helicopter but hes forgettable he could be a completely different person and next to nothing would have to change. We have seen Eddie at his worst and claw his way back up and hes finally letting himself be open and honest and soft. Eddie couldnt be replaced. Now im not saying Tommy can't be an interesting character but as he is right now?? He just isnt. Hes just as bland as every women (minus Taylor and Shannon) Buck and Eddie have dated and been hated on for no reason!!! Like i get that Tommy is a guy and we got canon Bi Buck and people are happy but those same people turn around and shit on Marisol from what ive seen(I could be wrong cause again i have done my best to avoid). Buddie fans arent safe from that either, cause we all know that Buddie fans do that but so many of those people who hated on them and said they didnt want them with anyone else suddenly decided that they were okay if Buck ended up with any guy. I dont know its just weird and i hate how many people are acting like Eddie isnt always going to be better then Tommy. Part of me wanted Tommy to stick around and help Buck and Eddie figure it all out but now?? i honestly just cant wait for him to be gone cause I want to have fun and read fics for my comfort ship and just chill where i can see all of my ships in the show without buck and tommy being everywhere or people saying crap about Eddie.

I have more to say but most of its about how gratifying waiting and seeing where this whole thing goes(Buddie season 8 PLEASE!!) and this is already why to long and i think im just going in circles and none of this makes sense so ima shut up for now and hopefully this will help it not fester and drive me insane and become a tommy hater

Edit: but i also hate that Tommy calls Buck Evan so he already had some stuff against him rip

[luvnami]

hi Ai!! I wanted to ask if you could yap about your streamer!sanemi fic >u< I'd love to hear what you have in mind for it, whatever you want to share!

HIIIIIIII ZEEEEEEEEEEE oh my god meow ok im gonna put it under the cut cause its a lot

i read a poem on tiktok by @/whispersintheabyss (its their yin and yang poem, day 20/21). its originally a mlm poem but the tldr is that the protag goes to a diner bc their mom set up a date for them, but a random person keeps the protag company while their date is late. eventually the protag and person fall in love (it's a lot more than this, but this is just a brief overview)

ive been talking with my friends about dating and life recently, especially since one of my friends is feeling really pressured by her parents to find a partner. ive had my own talks with my mom, and that whole topic abt love and marriage and dating feels very... heavy and stressful. ive also been struggling with direction in life (no college, no job), so i wanted to write smth that people could relate to! facing all these big decisions and feeling like youve fallen short of something you couldve been. im rambling a bit, but i promise ill get to the streamer part soon ><

i kind of want to emulate the whole 'arranged date' and 'run in with a stranger' thing with reader and sanemi, where streamer!sanemi feels bad watching reader wait for their date. i was also thinking of maybe reader being a casual viewer of sanemi's streams, so they recognise him and kind of laugh at the coincidences. i want them to find comfort in each other, e.g. late nights where reader can't sleep and they watch sanemi's streams to feel less lonely, or sanemi is feeling overwhelmed with the need to perform on stream so they feel relaxed being just himself around the reader

maybe i'll throw in a bit of streamer drama... i've been around these sorts of social circles so i have a fair idea of what happens (LOL)... it's probably gonna be slowburn (im sorry im such a sucker for exploring the developing dynamics of a relationship), i really want to emphasise reader's struggle to get their life back 'together' and the strains of having a viewer become more than just a face in the crowd for sanemi

this is just a huge thought so idk if i'll actually have the strength to do it... im already running out of steam for office romcom (though i swear its just the next arc that's hard to write) buttttttt i'll do my best!!!! i wanted to write a whole bunch of fics that would fit in my 'in every universe' series. i realised i never really explained, but i wanted to write about how sanemi never prioritises his own happiness in the canon timeline. its always his family, genya, masachika, never himself in the front seat. so, every fic under the series is supposed to be a separate timeline where sanemi finds his own happiness and soulmate :3 including office romcom, including this streamer fic, and a whole bunch of other one shots i have planned

[tojisun]

anon from the simon ask here,, sorry if the enclosure thing was to much i didn't know how else to express how insane i am for that man (⁠´⁠-⁠﹏⁠-⁠`⁠；⁠) and never EVER apologize for ranting i love it n i get it ! i don't think i ever saw my feeling so well explained in words. also, i completely understand the competence kink thing there's something so hot about a man that knows what he's doing and simon IS that man like he just looks so capable n ready for everything AND THE WAY HE CARES UGH i could cry thinking of the way he silently shows it. when i first started getting involved in cod i thought he would be this cold cold man but after watching a 5 hours walkthrough (i told you im crazy) i discovered this truly intricate character who seems like he feels so much even if he says so little HHH i just love him. for me his size was a principal attractive because duh but also i feel that it screams safety, like nothing can hurt you as long as he holds you but that could be my own conglomerate of issues speaking ┐⁠(⁠´⁠ー⁠｀⁠)⁠┌ over all, n as dumb as it can sound, he's a big source of comfort for me cuz i feel that if there's someone who could understand me it definitely him.

anyway im looking forward for the new works, i already know they r going to be amazing, and sorry for the long ass ask you can ignore it if you want <3

DONT APOLOGIZE FOR THIS ASK, IM DEVOURING IT!!! thank you for interacting back btw like oh my god i dunno how else to express how ?-$,&2$:$!: i am for this man and so seeing my ramblings be mirrored back makes me so happy 😭🫶🏼 also dont worry about the enclosure thing hahshshd made me laugh so hard, swearr

AND YOURE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT ABOUT EVERYTHING!!! theres something so fucking attractive about a man whos exceptional at what he does. the authority that underlies his competence because well you cant help but trust him; you cant help but want to trust him. AND THE WAY HE CARES??? THE WAY ITS THAT SILENT TYPE??? i (still) dunno much abt him but just like u, i thought hes those cold guys whos a lil bit of a lone wolf yk? then i found out that those dad jokes he kept cracking for soap was to ensure soap doesnt pass out because hes been shot?? i didnt expect it from him tbh but i think thats why i started spiralling harder – seeing how hes just a caring man!!!

N HHHHH THE SIZE AND HOW HES YOUR SAFETY?? ITS LIKE YOURE PEERING THROUGH MY MIND RN??? im sorry in advance bc ive been overusing this phrase but his size, on top of his personality and skills, makes me feel small but in a safe and tender way. does that make sense?? like, when he holds you, it just feels like he’s folding you within himself before tucking you in the pockets in his chest. and hhhh i cant stop envisioning the way that when he loves, it feels like safety and comfort; security and steadiness. LIKE you fit perfectly in his arms, under his chin, your face pressed on his chest where you can hear his heart beating. because he’s alive and he’s safe and he’s back home with you because he’s found a home in you. yk???

I JUST. I THINK THAT DYNAMIC SUITS HIM N YOU SM – HES YOUR SAFETY BUT YOURE HIS HOME RAAAAAHHHHHH hope that makes sm sense bc im typing this w my heart lodged into my throat and ik im rambling all over the place. im just so into him, its so 😭

“i feel like if theres someone who could understand me its definitely him” YEA. JUST, YEA

thank you so so much for ur support omg 🥹🫶🏼 im like a puddle rn its hdhjwjdjd thank you again for this ask darling <333 im sorry that my response turned out long (again) and hhhh sorry for the sporadic capslock usage 😭 take care sweetheart 💘💘💘

[mirrorbusterz]

No art today, but I've really been thinking about the rkn's characterization as of late.

They're honestly the antithesis of each other; their character traits clash and clash hard but I feel like that makes for a very nice sibling dynamic they have with each other. I also like to hc that their differing personalities was an intentional design choice by Wily.

I'll explain what I mean, just know that I'm not great at articulating my thoughts and this is more of a stream of consciousness than anything else. So! With that in mind:

Enker--Based on his CD data, we know that he's very dedicated to destroying Mega Man, and takes it very seriously; he's a hard-ass with a gloomy personality. Hell, if you know anything about Enka music in general you'd know he's pretty much a physical representation of the music's soulful but sad melodies.

He is so dedicated to his programming that he would rather put himself in harm's way (i.e. sustaining damage to use the Barrier Spear) if that meant he could destroy Mega Man. He is an agent of order dedicated solely to completing his tasks.

So, when said agent of order failed at his one and only task, it makes sense for Wily to overcorrect. Why not design a robot to be the complete opposite of Enker?

That's when Punk was created.

Punk--He's loud. He's brash. He's hates PTAs and the government. Ya gotta love him.

Anyways, he couldn't be farther removed from Enker. While Enker is stated not to stand out, Punk loves showing out, represented by his love of accessories. While Enker would prefer to uphold the status quo, Punk wants to shake it up and have fun doing it.

His personality is heavily based on his namesake, Punk music, which has its roots in anti-facism and rebellion against "the man." It fucking rocks. This is heavily contrasted by the melancholic, "refined," Enka music. Y'see where I'm getting at?

I find it interesting that Punk's entire existence is a paradox considering I'd imagine he has disdain for any kind of authority, Wily included, but must follow Wily's orders anyways. But that's a text post for another day.

Back to the main point, even his fighting style is contrasted by Enker's. Enker's has a level of elegance to it, while Punk just throws his entire body at you. However, this doesn't mean Punk is reckless. In fact, this attack is pretty safe considering he can't be damaged while in his ball form. This is contrasted by Enker's extremely unsafe, even reckless, method of attack, that requires him to sustain damage.

But even Punk, the agent of chaos, wasn't enough to stop Mega Man.

You probably noticed that I haven't touched on Ballade yet. And that's because he doesn't really have any contrasting traits compared to his brothers. Wily must've realized he swung too far in both directions with Enker and Punk, so he made Ballade as a nice middle ground between the two.

Ballade--doesn't really stand for much except fighting. He wants to fight a strong opponent, and views himself as the "strongest" robot, and because of this he can come across as single minded. He feels too standard, too plain.

But his complexities are revealed once he is beaten and realizes what he is fighting for is wrong. He respects Mega Man's power, something that neither Enker nor Punk did.

Maybe the reason why he was able to break Wily's programming was because he didn't stand for much, able to break his base instincts because of his "weak will."

Or maybe because his will was so strong was the reason he broke his programming. Was he, perhaps, tired of fighting for Wily, and saw self-destruction as the only way out? I haven't decided myself.

Whatever the case, in his dying moments he was able to stand for something: ending up on the right side of history by helping Mega Man.

So sorry if this was a rambling, confused read! I've got that RKN autism, lmao. Btw, I really wanted to dissect Quint some too since I consider him their adopted brother, but it was getting way too long. A text post for another time! :)

[readyandnot]

ready rambles~

sovereign state season one finale

part three thoughts

spoilers under the cut

* well already the thumbnail is basically inversion- so i hoped that they wouldn’t summon in the middle of the stadium cause that’s fucking terrible.

* I CALLED IT

I FUCKING CALLED ITTTT

* STARLIGHT GETTING THEIR MEMORIES BACK LETS GOOO

* let’s talk about the memories cause omg- THEIR FIRST MEETING, it’s so crazy to see that their dynamic really isn’t any different, and avior is the same guy hence why he was sarcastic again when he pulled starlight back in- now of course his sarcasm is limited because he did fall in love with starlight BUT ITS STILL THERE AND ALWAYS HAVE BEEN

* next- the HEALING GOD THERES SO MANY HEALING SCENES IN THIS SERIES; i wonder how starlight got injured? they must have tried a plan that didn’t work? maybe got lost in a circle? nevertheless AVIOR STARTING TO GET SOFT WITH STARLIGHT I CANT the fact that he calls them “human” bro come on we all know you have a cuter nickname you can use LMAO; hearing the teasing and laughing from him AFTER SEEING HIM HURTING FOR SO LONG, it’s so bittersweet, i hope we can see him like this again in the future after everything

* also THE PARALLEL OF AVIOR NOT BEING COMPLETELY TRUSTING TO STARLIGHT VS WHEN STARLIGHT WASNT SURE IF THEY COULD TRUST HIM WHEN THEY GOT PULLED BACK IN I CANTTTT

* next- the kissing. i am still not over it. i have listened to this audio 5 times now, and i’m still not over this part. IM IMAGINING WHAT LED UP TO THIS AND WHAT HAPPENED AFTER AHHHHH; the teasing in between kisses. i love them so much. THE PASSION. THE LOVE YOU CAN TELL THEY FEEL FOR EACH OTHER.

* then, the “confession” scene i’ll call it; i hc that this is right after that previous memory (cause let’s be honest that was getting hot and heavy-) but i’d like to think after all that they talked about it and that’s where this memory comes in. HES SO SOFT FOR STARLIGHT, i’m just imagining him grabbing their face and just ADMIRING THEM. he’s such a romantic holy shit

* THE FINAL MEMORY OF THEM TALKING ABOUT THE COFFEE SHOP. OMG. the “starlight, look at me, please.” gets me every damn time. his comfort is soft and so beautiful it truly makes me so happy. i love this relationship so much.

* “i love you. so much.” STARLIGHT LOVES YOU TOO I PROMISE

* also- can we just appreciate the piano music for a sec? BECAUSE ITS SO SIMPLE YET SO BEAUTIFUL. i love using the music as another form of storytelling, it’s such a nice addition and doesn’t take away from anything, i love and have loved it so much. it’s so calming in a way. i wonder what music he used…

* THEYRE HOMEEEEEEE LETS GO; to all you non believers… haha :)

* THE DISBELIEF, THE REUNITING AND HUGGING, THE SIGHS AND SHUDDERS OF RELIEF- chef’s kiss, a wonderful reuniting

* SO STARLIGHT WANTED AVIOR TO GO THROUGH THEIR MIND- the parallel of avior telling them he could use that as a trick- BUT THEM SUGGESTING IT NOW OMG; i mean it makes sense, i honestly would’ve done the same because one- i would want him to see what i saw and two- it is really hard to explain and quote like it’s nothing so it’s a perfectly valid way to explain

* THE HESITATION. THE CONSENT. TAKE NOTES CUTIE.

* “behind this wall, come on.” I IMAGINE HE GRABBED THEIR HAND AND PULLED THEM UP AHHHH

* avior baby i’m sorry you’re overwhelmed but you had to see that. THE FACT THAT HE KNOWS THEY HAVE THEIR MEMORIES BACK, I CAN SEE THE SHOCK AND REALIZATION ON HIS FACE

* “and how do you feel about that?”

* [what i think starlight said]

“like this…” AND GOES TO KISS HIM COME ON ITS PERFECT

* THE KISSINGGGGG SUCH UTTER PERFECTION- THE MELTING INTO IT FUCK

* listen avior, priorities are priorities- kissing your partner after so long before coming to terms with your mission is definitely a top priority. i don’t blame you one bit lol

* “i’m still trying to wrap my head around the idea that you don’t fucking hate me!”

* “i never hated you.”

* so…. it happened on new year’s eve. I KNEW THE THUMBNAIL HAD TO DO WITH INVERSION

* also the fact that they were there for over two years and it was only less than one hour in the real world??? can someone do that math cause i cant-

* THE SIMPLE THINGS LIKE A DARK ALLEY AVIOR I GET IT ITS OKAY

i hate to see characters cry, but this time it’s understandable, and it’s not like a heartbreak cry, it’s a relief. something that avior and starlight needed- relief.

* THEY COULD HEAR THE PORTAL OPEN??? THEY CANT BE THAT CLOSE; AVIOR DO NOT GET ANY CLOSER I DONT WANT YOU TO BE LIKE GAVIN

* and then they stopped hearing the screaming, because that’s how quick the decision was made by david. holy shit. it sounded like it was forever because we heard everyone’s perspectives when in reality it was less than a minute, and we finally saw that. that’s crazy.

* “too late to stop this tide.” SO WHAT ARE THEY SUPPOSED TO DO NOW???

* “we just traded one hell for another” WAIT ITS NOT YOUR FAULT COME ON NOW

wow, all i can say is wow. this series is something i did not expect i would come to love so much when i first listened- but it had me hooked from the first audio. now i was one of the luckier ones and got to catch up before the “confession” audio. but i still had to wait and feel everyone’s pain of the wait LOL

but it was so worth it. getting to this point to where we’re almost caught up in the current timeline is worth it. seeing the character development slowly going from slow burn to not and reuniting was worth the wait.

avior has definitely risen up in my ranks for the characters because his development and arc is a beautiful thing. we saw him at his lowest and highest moments, we saw him make mistakes, learn and love. he is a character that i’ve grown to love and i’m sure other people have as well.

starlight. starlight is truly one of my favorite listeners at this point- they’re such an intriguing person, no wonder avior fell for them LMAO, but they have this personality that’s infectious and a soul that’s admirable; they are a person who is stubborn in the best way possible and it’s been amazing seeing how they dealt with the situation. and how they are with avior back then, when they got back in, and how they are now!

i’m so excited for season two, i have a lot of theories and ideas- for example, how they could possibly meet people working for project meridian, or helping take down closeknit with sunshine and elliott (maybe even sweetheart?), and maybe even colliding with vega and warden at some point! there’s so many options and ways this can go, and i’m so thrilled to see that they’ll do it together.

thank you redacted for such a wonderful series and i speak for everyone when i say that we cannot wait for what will go on in season two.

what’s next- now i believe we would get more updates with the balance after the avior season one finale! that’s going to be something- just back to back angst WE DO NOT HAVE A BREAK LOL, but i’m so excited for the balance and the upcoming simpler videos! let’s see what the next lineup has in store :)

ps- vote for milo for march redactness HE DESERVES TO WIN OKAY SAM ALREADY WON

here’s to the believers o7 thanks for reading <3

[wellship]

Hey so you’re like zosan gospel to me bc you are the ONLY person who’s done zosan in a way that i like. Do you have any fic rec for them?? I wanna try and Get It but i really don’t unless it’s your comics—a Lot of other zosan is either ooc or ooc and fujoshi.

Also i really really dig ur art and your writing for your comics, you grasp the characters of op (esp sanji) in such an iconic way idk its in character but also so much more mature at the same time, i respect it.

(Also also sorry if you don’t answer asks on this blog i just figured the ship fic rec ask should go to the ship blog)

Thank you so much for the kind words!! It's extremely flattering to think I can be showing people what zosan can be, HAHA. I know exactly where you're coming from. I was a young gay teen/tween when I first got into One Piece, and so I saw some potential chemistry between Zoro and Sanji, but it seemed like every other person I saw shipping them was shipping them for totally different reasons to me. It felt like a lot of them were totally ignoring what made their dynamic unique.

So I just kind of stopped trying to engage with other shippers and watched/read the whole series in a vacuum LMAO. The way I interpret the ship ended up shielded from the popular zosan vibe. I see them get forced into very strict, stereotypical roles that don't really match up with their personalities at all, like... the whole appeal of them, to me, is that they're as similar as they are different? Neither of them are going to be stoic all the time or none of the time, or bashful, or aggressive, etc... They can both easily have either of those traits depending on circumstance. A relationship where they end up stuck in the same roles forever just... isn't Zosan to me, haha. Obviously a lot of it is heteronormativity, too. A lot of preconceptions about how a relationship has to have one "wife" role and one "husband" role and then what those roles dictate... etc etc. Not only is that not really how gay couples work, full stop, it's also just totally not how zosan works LMAO

Sorry for rambling, this is kind of off-topic. I guess because you said you wanted to understand the ship I thought I'd explain a bit of why it appeals to me. At the end of the day I like their canon dynamic, I think there's a lot of love and trust behind it already, I just think it's totally possible there could be a layer of romantic love to it, too. Ultimately they both know the other person is someone they understand, and can rely on - being able to predict someone's actions, even if they're actions that are going to piss you off or which you'll disagree with, is a kind of comfort and stability, lol. They know each other inside and out. And also, it must be a load off each others' mind for them to think, "now there's a guy I don't have to look out for".

ALRIGHT ACTUALLY ONTO THE QUESTION YOU ASKED: I don't read a lot of fics, teehee! [Gets run over by a semi] BUT I can tell you right now you can't go wrong with anything by demonzoro on AO3. They have a really nuanced and beautiful comprehension of their relationship and their dynamic. They give zosan a lot of depth and emotion that's very compelling and sincere. I recommend starting off with And Then The Sun Came Out, which has been described as a "slow burn speedrun". The visuals in this fic...... they haunt me

I don't have any specific fic to link, but I also often enjoy the way 8ball (also on AO3) portrays them. It's a bit different from the dynamic I give them, but what I've read is good, well-founded, and draws you in. They also do doodles on Twitter - I've been greatly enjoying the childhood AU comics they've been posting currently.

On that note, if you like the ratbag dynamic I give zosan then you'll probably also enjoy pierogiy's stuff on Twitter, especially if, like me, you enjoy kicking Sanji around like a football

Thank you again for the kind words on my writing/characterisation of them! A lot of comic work focuses on the art but I work hard on the writing too, so this feedback means a lot!

[twigs-sprigs]

oo when i think of ur art i definitely picture the cool poses and expressions!! u use very vibrant and neon colors and that kinda stands out for me. and the fact that u add a tail to some of ur designs gjdkgkd thats such a fun detail

WAU WG H HGG HG GG G THESE ARE SO NICE... also.. cool tumblr person acidsaladd asked me a thing .. .woah ,, , , such a big fan of ur art and stuff BJDWGJHJHDW AUGH

ANYWAY TYSM!!

(omori art spotted in the corner HJKDWHJKD dont mind it its fine its ok)

poses!! yeah i love dynamic poses a lot.. its hard for me to make characters sit still (is that the right word??) like-

a while ago (literally if you scroll down on my blog to older pieces ive made) i feel like everything looked a little odd and stiff? its hard to explain exactly, but for a long time ive had this FEAR of everything i make looking the same, like every character and every pose being basically the same with different colors.

and my first response to that fear was: "okay. ill draw more dynamic things then. so they wont look like the same thing over and over!" and now it just kind of evolved in me getting huge enjoyment in drawing all sorts of dynamic/fighting poses or whatever!! i like expressions and poses being exaggerated and very shape-based

explaining my art is so hard JDJWKHWD because i always completely SPACE OUT while i draw, so when the drawings done i literally dont know how i did that KDKJDWJKHDWKJ

and colors too!! yeah i do love using more vibrant colors. i like glowy things and i feel like they can give otherwise bland color schemes i tend to do some life! i dunno the exact reason WHY i use the colors that i do, but hey if yall like it i must be doing good!!!

(literally posting random shit from my doodles canavas and hoping it makes sense. yipee. also hey that nya design is from the pa au. in case anyones interested HJKDWKJWD)

and,,, as for tails on characters,,,

i really cant explain that. i just like tails BJKDWJKHKJDW

and i guess... i add them where they'd make sense in my head??? JKBWDKJD

literally rambling abt my own art. ill stop now JBDWJB SO SORRY AUGH H

[candychronicles]

red room // y. inasa

A/N: my take on the bnharem sex workers collab! so excited to write for inasa. he’s an incredibly underrated character and all i hope is that one person likes this lol

CHARACTER PAIRING: Yoarashi Inasa x F!Reader

WORD COUNT: 3,735

WARNINGS: oral (m!receiving), sex work, just some good ol fashioned safe, consensual sex

SYNOPSIS: a lucrative encounter with a group of pro heroes leads to an unlikely relationship.

want to read more goodies? head on over here!

loud music blared over the speakers as you sashayed your way through the back stage. it was a crowded night and you were itching to get on stage and make some money. usually, you got good tips just by shaking your hips in your scantily clad body but the real cash was private events. it was especially rewarding when pro heroes, such as the ones who sat in the private VIP section, joined the club. that was when you made the most dough.

your set was announced and before people could prepare themselves you sauntered on stage, false confidence oozing out of you. you never really loved your job for this aspect, nor did you think you did great in front of a crowd, but you had been faking it your whole life and it came in handy when you walked across the platform, twirling around the sleek metal bar in the center of the stage.

slowly, your gaze raked across the people in the bar, eyes narrowed into slits, a small smirk across your face. you lazily dragged your hand up your body and across your chin, letting it fall to the pole. gripping the metal, you twirled your body around once, twice, three times before jumping up, entwining your legs around it and letting your head fall back, hair cascading towards the floor. you spent the next five minutes tantalizingly moving about the area. slinking to the floor towards the end of your set, you pushed your breasts together as you tucked the tips from the greedy men in between them, sliding the rest in the waist of your sequined panties. with one small wave, you pulled yourself off the ground and sauntered back behind the stage.

it had only been a few minutes of you counting your money in the dressing room before one of the bar maids had flagged you down, letting you know one of the VIP sections was asking for you. a cheshire grin made its way across your face as you realized that this could be the big money you were after for the night.

“well hello boys, how are we tonight?” you cooed, sliding into the seat next to a rather uncomfortable looking guy with striking red and white hair.

a man of intensely large stature sat in the middle, a few older men surrounding him in the semi-circle booth. across from you sat another guy your age: tall with buzzed hair and looking as equally uncomfortable as the man sitting next to you.

“we were very intrigued by your performance,” the large man in the middle stated. when he leaned forward, you recognized him as the former number one pro hero Endeavor. despite his size, you weren’t intimidated. you may have not had a lot of confidence with large crowds, but when it came to working a group, you could get them wrapped around your finger with a little bat of your eyelashes.

this collective was no different than the rest. a few jokes to the ones who were uncomfortable, chagrin smiles to the ones who just wanted some entertainment and some well placed compliments and they were putty in your hands. Endeavor spent most of the time sloshing his drink around and bragging about his accomplishments back in the day. you had found out that the guy sitting next to you was his son and they did not seem to get along very well. while you had spent time verbally praising the former number one hero, you secretly whispered jokes and jabs to the dynamic man next to you, allowing him to loosen up and even smile. 

when the session had finished, you were tipped heavily. some sloppy cheek kisses were exchanged and you had thought that had been the end of it, a thick wad of cash in your hands, when Endeavor had spoken up once more.

“Inasa, you haven’t said one word to this pretty young lady. she’s spent her time here all for us and you disrespect her like this?” he chided, but his words were laced with something else, something sharp.

“a private room might change your mind, perhaps? you’ve barely looked at anyone here or even touched your drink. i suggest you change your act after this is over.”

you felt bad for the fellow, you really did, but when Endeavor, Enji, he told you to call him, pulled out a stack so large you didn’t even know if you could fit your hand around it, you accepted immediately. you were going to make sure he had the time of his life one way or another.

you placed your hand gently on his shoulder and he jumped, his skin crawling underneath your touch. you didn’t let it phase you though as you guided him towards the private room, your hand coming to clasp around his, twirling yourself as you giggled. he looked like he was going to be sick, face clammy and eyes darting everywhere but your body. 

when you had finally sat him down in the cushy couch, he burst.

“i’m so sorry miss, i’m trying really hard to be respectful and not look at you. i’m not interested in this at all, so if you could please just let me go, i’d really appreciate it.”

you blinked at him, cocking your head before howling, hands clutching at your stomach as you listened to him continue to babble.

“are you not into women? it’s okay if you’re not, i’m happy to sit here but your friend paid a great amount of money for you to be in here and if i want to keep getting that money i have to at least do my job and make you stay the full hour.”

“oh no no that’s not it at all. in fact, i find you very attractive. i just, i don’t like these sorts of establishments. not that they’re bad in any way, oh no, your profession is quite admirable, it’s just that i prefer to have a connection before engaging in anything flirtatious and physical. though i have been told that it is easy for me to make friends and i guess that’s true, so maybe we will be friends by the end of this and it won’t be a total waste, but it’s…”

you cut him off with your hand, flabbergasted at his ramblings.

“i’m happy to just talk and i’m happy to make friends. so tell me about yourself then.”

you sat down opposite him, sinking into the soft plush as you listened to him ramble about his life: where he went to school, when he met Shouto Todoroki, how he became a pro hero, how he landed the job at Endeavor’s agency and how he had ended up across from you in the burgundy room. you listened with rapt attention, nodding sympathetically when he expressed struggles, giving little whoops and cheers when he explained his victories and just generally murmuring along to his story. 

when the time was up, you stood up and walked over to him.

“is it okay if i sit down?” you questioned, motioning to his lap. 

he looked you up and down as if you had three heads but leaned back, palms placed firmly on the plush seating. you giggled at his actions but proceeded nonetheless, popping buttons open on his shirt, rustling up his clothes and placing a big kiss on his cheek for good measure.

“don’t want your boss thinking you chickened out on him,” you teased. “it was great meeting you Inasa. it’s not every day i get a gentleman as kind as you coming in. i do hope i get to see you again, if only to listen to more of your stories. take care of yourself and stay safe.”

you stood up and opened the door, motioning for him to step out and walk down the hall back to his booth. he watched you for a moment, enraptured by your actions, before he quickly turned around and practically sprinted down the hall. you heard the whoops and hollers of the men as he returned back to his seat and you smiled, satisfied with the heavy weight of cash in your hand. 

---

the next night of working started out the same. a few sets with some decent tips, but you had little luck when it had come to private dances and you greatly missed the generous tips from the booth the night before. just when you had thought luck ran out for you though, a familiar buzzed head darted nervously around, seemingly looking for someone.

“are you lost handsome? never thought i’d see you here again, let alone so soon.”

relief flooded his eyes and before you got a chance to tease him for it, he had pulled out a stack of money equally as large as the night before.

“you know you don’t have to pay me that much for an hour.”

“will this cover the rest of the night?” 

you didn’t even have to look at the stack to know it would cover a whole week's worth of private dances if he wanted. wordlessly, you took the money from him and led him to your private room. this time you brought in snacks and drinks, choosing to sit on the lavish carpet instead, cocooning yourself with pillows.

“so what do you want to talk about this time?” you asked, spurring him on to talk about his latest adventures.

things took a turn for the worst when, an hour in, he became visibly upset.

“i feel like this is wrong,” he confessed, eyes darting to scantily clad figure, teeth clenching as he attempted to calm himself.

“this is my work. i don’t feel degraded, i feel empowered. people are paying me for my services, whether they be innocent or not. i choose what i get to do with my body and how. nobody else can control me. i’m happy to be anything to anyone and i must confess that talking to you has been the highlight of both nights. it’s a gentle reprieve from everything else but at the end of the day this is a job and i don’t feel demeaned by it, so please don’t treat me like i’m some abused puppy.”

after that argument, his body visibly relaxed. it didn’t really matter exactly what made him relax but it did lead to a much more enjoyable night. when everything was over, you left him with a kiss, pinching his cheeks with your hand as you led him out for the second night in a row.

you had a day off, choosing to enjoy your excess money by splurging on some new items you wanted but when you came in the next day, he was there waiting, a wad of cash in one hand and a bag of something in the other.

“a private room for the whole night?” you questioned, not waiting for his response as you took the cash out of his hand and grabbed his tie, leading him to your room once more.

when he sat down across from you, he pulled out his own snacks and drinks, claiming he needed to pay you back for the night before. you shrugged your shoulders as you dug in, chatting the night away, laughing and enjoying yourself much more than you should for him just being a client. 

“Inasa, while i don’t mind you spending exorbitant amounts of money on me every night, i’ve got to ask, why are you here? why do you come just to chat all night? do you not have friends or family?”

his eyebrows furrowed, mouth forming a harsh line before he stated, “i do but nobody treats me the way you do. nobody treats me like i’m, well, nobody. i don’t claim to be the number one pro hero, but i am fairly popular, and the fact that you sit across from me chatting and listening to my stories like i’m an old friend and not some big shot with money makes me feel different.”

you pondered the thought for a moment, not realizing how taxing it could be to have so many eyes on you all at once. while you felt sympathetic, you still didn’t understand why he paid you so much for just one night. was he afraid you wouldn’t accept the normal rate? was he trying to remain professional despite the lines already being blurred?

“listen, Inasa, while I don’t mind you doing this, we can be friends outside of work. you don’t have to pay me for just talking, at least while i’m not here. this is my job and i’d like it to remain somewhat professional. i won’t be leaving for any person, any relationship, any amount of money, because i find dignity and excitement in doing so. if that’s something that doesn’t bother you, then let’s finish the night off and if you’d like to see me, we can go get coffee or something, yeah? the most i’ll let you pay is for the drinks themselves.”

he nodded his head firmly, agreeing to see you for coffee, but something seemed off still. you tried to keep the conversation going, throwing candy at his face and cracking jokes but he remained somewhat stoic still.

“alright buttercup, what’s wrong?” you questioned, frowning when he looked up at you.

“you find dignity in this job, it doesn’t bother you to be sexual with someone in any manner for a certain price, and you don’t look down on anyone who engages with you sexually?”

you nodded your head at his questions, looking at him quizzically as he processed the information.

“would you look down on me if i asked you for something like that?”

ah, so that was the big question. it would take a fool for someone to not realize how he had looked at you, how his gazes got more bold and as he shifted, holding a pillow in his lap as you laid lavishly across the fluffy carpet. you felt stupid for not realizing sooner that that was what he wanted, but with a satisfied smile, you shook your head no. 

“it’s my job and you are my client. you have paid me well, way more than i would ask for anything like this. i don’t see it as weird or uncomfortable. we do have some ground rules to lay if you’re interested though.”

you spent the next few minutes explaining safe sex, STDs, condoms, rules and boundaries for the scene and safe words in case anything got out of hand. he sat listening with rapt attention, soaking in every word you said and engaging in the conversation maturely and respectfully. when everything was said and done, you pulled out your contract, having him sign, agreeing with all that you had said.

“i don’t know if i can do this. i feel like this is wrong. not because you do but because i like you and i know this is just a job for you and wow i shouldn’t have done this.”

“relax Inasa, i’ll take care of you. and if it gets too much, don’t forget to use your safeword.”

he clenched the seat next to him as you straddled his lap, taking his face into your hands as you etched all the little scars littering the skin. 

“it’s not every day i get to fuck a handsome guy like yourself,” you cooed. “is it okay if i kiss you? i don’t usually do that with clients but i think you’re an exception to the rule.”

he responded by surging forward, all inhibitions lost as his lips smashed into yours, hands reaching to pull you impossibly close to him. you squealed into the kiss but relished in the way he felt, the way his large body engulfed all your senses. you were definitely screwed, not only literally but mentally as well. you knew damn well that this was more than a client interaction and would lead to something potentially messy but right now you didn’t seem to care as you felt his hands grasp at your ass, squeezing and eliciting yet another moan from you. this time, he took advantage, his tongue delving into your mouth, exploring every inch of you.

“i need you Inasa,” you moaned, partially because it was true but also to spur him on, to continue to make him feel confident and satisfied. 

“let me take care of you first,” he tried to insist, eyes blown wide at your lewd words, but you had other plans.

you shimmied out of your panties, sequins glittering in the dim red light, tossing them to the other side of the room before motioning for him to stand up, asking permission to take off his pants. when he nodded his head, you chided him, reminding him to use his words. all it took was a squeak of a “yes” for you to slowly pull his pants and boxers down, mouth absolutely drooling at the sight of his cock. he wasn’t the longest you had by any means but he was so incredibly thick you weren’t even sure if he could fit inside, but all you knew was that you wanted to be stuffed full.

you pushed him back onto the couch, dropping to your knees as you settled yourself between his thighs, kissing and sucking at the sensitive skin. before you even had a chance to ask him if you could touch him, he was already begging, hand gently placed on your head as he struggled to remain calm. 

you spent a few moments just admiring the way he breathed, how he moved, what got him twitching, before you began. a soft lick was placed on the underside of his shaft and he jumped, startled yet aroused at the soft feeling of your tongue on his dick. you licked once more, enjoying the way he reacted, before you took him fully into your mouth. he felt warm and heavy on your tongue and you did your best to take him all in, using your hand to pump the rest of him. 

a languid pace was set, you appreciating the way he reacted to your touch but it wasn’t long before he was begging for more, his release being teased. you complied, wanting nothing more than to keep the customer happy, or so you told yourself. in reality, you were enjoying this much more than you could possibly explain.

it took only a few more minutes before he was bucking his hips into your mouth, spurting hot liquid down your throat. you swallowed every drop, sticking your tongue out to show him what you had done. he spent the next five minutes apologizing for not asking permission before doing that but you had shut him up by straddling his lap, your pussy grazing over his already hard again cock.

“want you s’bad Inasa. won’t you fuck me please?” 

he sputtered and stammered, not believing this was happening but complying all the same. he quickly grabbed the condom and rolled it down on his shaft, careful not to rip anything. he slowly lifted you up before placing you down on his cock, enjoying the feeling of you sucking him in immediately. 

it took an agonizing three minutes before he bottomed out. he had stretched you completely, filling you to the brim with his cock. you felt like you were going to burst at the seams with how full you were but it also felt so incredibly good.

“please move, wanna feel you inside of me,” you begged, throwing your head back and bouncing on your knees.

he complied once again without question, thrusting his hips up to meet your pace, setting a fast yet gentle tone to the scene. you gripped his shoulders with all your strength, attempting to steady yourself against his speed. moans and whines left your mouth at an obscene rate, your brain being fucked out of your body as he continued to stuff you over and over again.

when he realized he was close yet again, he licked his thumb before placing it experimentally against your clit. you bucked immediately into his touch, keening at the overwhelming sensation. setting a rate that matched his thrusts, he circled around the bud, applying just the right pressure to have tears leaking out of your eyes, feeling so overwhelmed by sensation of him and him alone.

“please, i want to cum, please,” you begged, this time putty in his hands as he continued to fuck you senseless.

“cum for me, please, i want to see it, want to see your pretty face as i make you cum.”

all it took was some added speed and pressure and a gentle grab to your chin with his other hand to have you come undone, eyes screwing shut as an intense wave of pleasure rushed over your body. he sputtered and thrusted a few more times before coming in the condom, his body instantly relaxing. 

he spent the next few minutes bringing you down from your high, rubbing soothing circles on your back, having you drink some water and cleaning you from your own juices which were dribbling down your thighs. when he was finished, he pulled back on your underwear, careful of your now sore and throbbing cunt.

sitting down on the couch, you spread out, completely spent from just one fuck. never in your life had you had dick that good, the sheer care and intensity at which he screwed you sending you reeling as you tried to wrap your head around what had just happened.

looking at the clock, you realized his time was up. despite not wanting to see him go, you had to admit to yourself that you had a fun time and that this was something outside of a workplace situation. 

“i-uh, your time is up now Inasa. i hope you had fun and had a satisfactory experience.”

“i did, a lot.”

“i hope to see you again soon,” you finally admitted, bringing your eyes up to stare at him, at his truly disheveled yet satisfied state. you didn’t want to get your hopes up, knowing that he paid for this and it was strictly professional, but when he uttered a question, you smiled, hoping that this would turn out to be an interesting time.

“so, uh, coffee soon?” 

[pop-punklouis]

here to talk about stranger things

i'm a sucker for cinematography and some shots were really well done. specifically the one where the kids are biking and it takes you to the upside down where the adults are biking too!

i'm so glad they're focusing on eleven's traumas because phew she has been through a lot. my mind's absolutely blown because of the parallels between how manipulative dr brenner is as a guardian figure vs how joyce (and hopper) emit this kindness and consent. i've talked about it a bit here.

i'm so mad because they did will SO dirty like my poor boy didn't go through so much shit for him to be brushed aside like that, especially when he's like head canonically queer.

also absolutely hate how one dimensional they've made jonathan.

also, eleven deserves someone better than mike. free her from him pls.

i really don't want the nancy/steve thing to happen again. if anything, in honour of pride month let nancy/robin be a thing instead

also wtf is up with suzie's family oh my god??

as always, steve gets 💋💋 one of the best character developments i've seen tbh

in relation to you talking about how will+jonathon+mike got so little screen time, i feel like the new characters, like the baseball captain dude the one who was dating chrissy got more screen time than the trio 😂

anyways this got long im sorry 🙈

SONIIII please hello. yes! there are always certain scenes when a new ST season drops that cause me drool with how much I love its cinematography. I was kinda let down by the CGI this season though. It was *yawn* how much of it they used instead of utilizing the hybrid of physical/digital effects. Like some scenes had great CGI while just five minutes later it is horrid. so weird to me because it takes me out of the immersion rip

i do like how they actually gave eleven a proper backstory! i found those scenes to be more interesting this season as the pacing felt off to me, and it dragged a bit in parts. so getting a more developed background was refreshing for her. and oooo i haven't had time to properly analyze parallels, but that was a great catch regarding the difference between Brenner and Joyce/Hop as guardian figures to El 👀

they've continuously pushed Will to the backburner since season 3 and I'm! sick of! it! i want to see more of him and he deserves better tbh (much better than mike but i digress lmao) pretty homophobic if you ask me 🔪😵‍💫

did jonathan even.... exist this season. he was so unmemorable it is hard to tell. what even was the point of will+mike+jonathan's C plot besides the duffer brothers having absolutely nothing going for their storyline so just. didn't really do anything with it lmao and YEAH?? honestly fuck mike he annoys me. both el and will deserve better 💅🏼

the hamfisted nancy/steve rekindling drives me NUTS. it is such lazy writing and is only building to steve getting his hopes up and having them crushed again when jonathan tumbles back into the actual plot and "gets the girl" again its so boring and expected. please give steve something else to focus on. give him MORE than being the mopey ex boyfriend. let him be happy please. nancy/robin??? i'd LOVE to see it actually 💕

Suzie's family is mormon!! that like. explains practically everything about that household's dynamics lol they just amplified the Mormon stereotype but its hilarious djrjrktk

steve continues to be one of the only characters to carry this show on his back for another season like thank you king as always 🌹💋

(and don’t be sorry!! i could ramble about stranger things all day 🫣)

[dutchforstrangers]

Digimon Astrology Journey - 'Head first' buddies: Koushiro & Taichi

So I’m back with some headcanon Digimon Astrology and I’m diving into it head first! Something fierce leader Taichi would do, however he needs his loyal ‘brains’ there with him and that will be Koushiro. Where Koushiro is a thinker, analytical in every way due to his pragmatic Sun and Rising, Taichi is one of action due to his Moon and Rising (and Mars!). However don’t underestimate them, they have some serious airy energy going on, making them vocal, diplomatic and charming in their own individual ways.

These boys are so different, yet work together very well. They just have a hard time… talking to others or each other about… the complicated, personal specific stuff feelings. Must be the stars, right?

It’s been a while, but you can read back all things Astrology (basics, background, etc.) in previous posts Part 1 | Part 2. Furthermore, exploring Taichi and Koushiro’s birth charts is part 2 of this series, you can read the exploration of Sora and Mimi’s birth charts here.

The important stuff

Koushiro Izumi, August 26th 1989 (around 05.30AM)

Sun: Virgo (earth-mutable)

Moon: Gemini (air-mutable)

Rising: Virgo (earth-mutable)

Taichi Yagami, October 15th 1988 (around 5PM)

Sun: Libra (air-cardinal)

Moon: Sagittarius (fire-mutable)

Rising: Aries (fire-cardinal)

Warning: IT’S VERY LONG! I’m sorry in advance…

A little disclaimer before I start rambling: These are headcanons! Their given birthdays are not canon at all, but just me having fun combining my love for Digimon and my love for Astrology. It can be highly self-indulging, but maybe you can find some truth in it as well! If you want to know how I calculated their birthdays, read my previous posts as stated above. I use these birthdays in my own fanfiction, but feel free to use them as well. Some credit in the form of a reblog, like or mention of these posts and/or my Tumblr would be highly appreciated! See something you want to discuss? I love to learn and talk! As said these are my headcanons, but I’m not afraid to change my mind or to defend what I have if necessary.

Everything charts and the why under read more!

Koushiro Izumi - August 26th 1989

Assigning the Virgo Sun to this boy was the first thing I did, because I myself am convinced Koushiro Izumi is the embodiment of a true Virgo. I could be wrong, as I did not study Astrology and am a simple hobbyist, but everything I read about Virgos always lead me back to this particular maroon headed anime dork for years now. Hence why I gave him the same Sun and Rising sign, because Koushiro is who he is. Anyway, let me try to convince you.

For starters, here are a few (or actually all the) things about Virgos in general, for both Sun and Rising. Virgos are bright, practical, pragmatic, orderly, respectful, critical, perfectionists, security driven, communicative, tidy, nervous, detail-oriented… Can I stop already? Okay, now pick one of the above and tell me it’s not fitting for Koushiro.

…

Hm, I know. It’s hard, isn’t it?

Maybe his tidiness is questionable depending on the situation… But the guy is orderly and the chaos only exists in times when his perfectionism takes over. The nervous part from the Virgo can be seen in shyness or even being obedient. All of that makes Koushiro a dedicated friend who would do anything in his power to make everything work for you. Danger is that he will efface himself, thinking he’s not worth as much as the others. This is what happens in Adventure episode 28 right after he solved the card riddle. On the top left corner either the Agumon or the Gomamon is right, but he doesn’t know which one and he apologizes, which is not necessary at all, with: “I’m sorry I couldn’t live up to your expectations,” which is such a Virgo Sun/Rising thing to say..! The Virgo dynamic is alive and kicking.

It’s even more alive and kicking in his other strong Virgo placements: Mercury and Mars. With Mercury in Virgo, Mercury is in it’s sign of its rulership, making it a strong placement. And precisely that planet is the planet of thoughts and knowledge! The combination of his Sun, Rising, Mercury and Mars in Virgo makes him be, engage, think and act like a true Virgo. Detail-oriented, thoughtful, respectful, orderly, practical and curious!

The hardest part for his birthday calculation was his Moon placement. The Moon is all about emotions, needs, wants, behavior, responds, et cetera. I first gave him a Capricorn Moon, but my boyfriend is such a Cap Moon and it didn’t fit the bill for Koushiro in my opinion. So I read and searched and eventually came to the conclusion it had to be an Air sign Moon, simply for the fact that our boy Koushiro is the bearer of the crest of Knowledge and Air signs can be seen as the intellectual ones of the Zodiac! Eventually I went for the Gemini Moon and I’m going to explain why exactly.

One could say Gemini is the bearer of Knowledge just as much as Koushiro is. Gemini LOVE to know things! They are naturally curious and are great communicators, when it comes to knowledge (pun warning if you’ve seen the reboot: they love to bring joy to their knowledge). Gemini tend to be a bit superficial when it comes to having and sharing knowledge and of course we know that’s not the case with our Koushiro here, due to his many Virgo placements, making him more observant and inward. What the Gemini Moon DOES to him is making this boy very talkative! He likes to spill what’s on his mind, he likes to share what he thinks, he likes to ramble and rant. It’s something we see him doing in Tri a lot, especially that one scene in Reunion part 3 (episode 3) where he keeps on rambling about all the strange events and he misses the first part of the conversation between the other DigiDestineds (about the news and Jyou’s ‘girlfriend’ poor guy no one believes him). Koushiro misses the conversation because a) his Gemini Moon likes to ramble and keep rambling, and b) because his Virgo placements can make him a bit unaware of his surroundings quite the time…

That’s not a bad thing per se, Koushiro is just very much focused on his work and d e t a i l s, which is a VERY Virgo-ish trait. But lets not forget that his priority is to help others with that knowledge and that the combination of his Virgo placements with his Gemini Moon makes him a great mentor. Brings me to his role throughout the entirety of Adventure 02: The Mentor. You’re welcome.

Another Gemini Moon thingy is rudeness. Now we know Koushiro is the most polite person out of ALL DD’s, always using honorifics, even saying Hikari-san instead of Hikari-chan, because Koushiro IS respect. But Koushiro is not afraid to tell you what’s at stake in times of ‘danger’, he’s not afraid to tell the truth. There are a few examples for that in Adventure, Adventure 02 and in Tri, but I’d like to refer to one of my favorite moments in whole Digimon Adventure history. Because Koushiro x rudeness brings me back to Diaboromon strikes back when he’s obviously so done with everyone, then Mimi enters the scene and he doesn’t even care. In the English dub she literally says “How rude”. Ooooohhh Koushiro, you little rude demon… It’s not the biggest proof it’s a simple one and my personal favorite.

All of the talkativeness and rudeness is something we mostly see Koushiro doing when he’s most comfortable. So we won’t see him being all talkative all the time -sharing more than just plain, superficial knowledge and instead more personal helpful knowledge- with everyone, but we do see him being talkative and speaking up to certain characters he’s most comfortable with. Now name one boy he’s very talkative to compared with literally all the other characters… You know what? Scroll down.

Last thing and then I’ll stop rambling about this beautiful and lovely nerd. His Venus, planet of values (and love…) is in Libra. What does that mean? Well, I’ve seen quite some fans type Koushiro as a bi-sexual, or something in that direction. Or even better a ‘disaster bi-sexual’. I already agreed on that, but when I saw this birth chart… IT’S (HEAD)CANON! Seriously, Libra is the zodiac sign of doubt, decision making (or actually no decision making, but I’ll get there with the next boy) and relationships and if you have your Venus placed in Libra you’re doomed to be a disaster when it comes to making decisions in your love life both romantically and platonically! Venus in Libra creates the desire for a good and loving relationships, but Koushiro’s Virgo Sun/Rising makes him more shy, his Virgo Mars makes him hold back. Once again, the Virgo Sun/Rising-Libra Venus dynamic lets him efface himself in relationships, thinking they have nothing to offer, but they have!! And so Koushiro gets left behind with his unresolved feelings… the boy has a hard time in love, let’s give him all a hug!

Taichi Yagami - October 15th 1988

The protagonist. Okay, let me compare this goggle headed protagonist to another goggle headed protagonist outside the Digimon franchise: Naruto. This is probably more interesting to people who have watched and know Naruto, so you can skip the part. To me Naruto is the classical protagonist type; bold, adventurous, playful, (a little) obnoxious at some times, hot headed… These are traits we easily assign to fire signs in the zodiac, especially Aries. So I would immediately give Naruto the Aries Sun placement. However, when we see Naruto grow up, his behavior and the way he speaks and leads grows up with him as well. That’s only natural. And based on those changes I wouldn’t necessarily give Naruto the Aries Sun placements, although the Aries placement or another fire placement is very likely to be present in his chart.

Now I could go even further, explain the development from child to adult through Jung’s theory about cognitive functions, but that’s incredibly complicated and a looooong stretch I won’t be making here today. In short, Jung’s development theory is interesting, because it shows how we first see the obvious traits in a child which are the traits the child engages (Rising sign) the world with before it develops the other functions showing the person’s true identity (Sun sign). So we could say we first see someone’s Rising sign more clearly before the Sun comes shining through. Like with Naruto. And the same could be for Taichi in the case of this headcanon.

To tackle his birth chart and big three, I’ll be starting with explaining his Rising Sign before his Sun sign. And the Rising sign I assigned him is Aries Rising.

Like I said above, Aries is bold, adventurous, playful and above all: courageous. Especially the Aries Rising placement which is more courageous than its Aries Sun counterpart. Aries are born leaders, can be extremely competitive, are somewhat restless and desperately need to move. In Taichi’s case with the above birth chart, that urge to move is magnified by his Aries Mars placement. The dynamic of his Aries Rising and Aries Mars makes Taichi a mover, an adventurer, and incredibly determined. This could be both positively, always wanting the best (especially for yourself, as Aries is a pretty selfish sign), and a tad negatively, always going and going and going. In the Adventure series this could be the reason why he makes Greymon dark-evolve, because he wants things too bad and too fast. Aries are hot headed and can grow impatient if things don’t go the way they want. And the Aries Rising and Mars dynamic makes Taichi a very physical guy. Mix that with the impatience and he is not afraid to pick fights and use his fists.

All of this can make Taichi a very stormy and reckless boy (boundaries? What’s that?), but also a fearless leader. The exuberance, the impatience and restlessness comes back in his Sagittarius Moon placement as well. This Sag Moon in combination with his strong Aries placements in Rising and Mars makes Taichi a sportive, physical, optimistic and forward leader that is incredibly courageous and adventurous, which could make him a bit ‘superficial’ as a protagonist. But the Sag Moon also deepens and strengthens his leader skills.

Sagittarius is a sign pictured by a centaur with an arrow and bow. The centaur’s horse legs make the Sag want to move and be free, but the arrow aims in a clear direction and aiming takes knowledge and focus. Sagittarius thus is an adventurous fella, but also a philosopher. Taichi’s Sag Moon placement makes him a pro in seeing the bigger picture and connecting dots next to his never ending energy. He will make sure we’re going in the right direction by overlooking the whole situation. So we absolutely shouldn’t forget Taichi is a true strategist! He sees, understands what’s at stake in a situation, connects the dots, comes with a strategy and like a true leader knows his team and can place everyone in his right spot to get through the toughest of situations (once again referring to Taichi asking Koushiro to pick the cards in Adventure episode 28). Speaking about a great leader, gosh, Taichi, you’re truly amazing! <3

However, it’s his Aries Rising and Mars that often make him act before he thinks, preferably alone (Taichi is a teamplayer, but the selfish and reckless Aries in him makes him act alone. And the sum of teamplayer + acting alone = self-sacrifice mode… which happens ALL THE DAMN TIME). Or actually makes him act while thinking without doing a short reflection beforehand. Seriously, I’m convinced that this reflection in advance could have saved him a lot of trouble throughout Digimon Adventure. Let’s blame it on (t)his (headcanon) birth chart…

Also, all of the above vouches for Taichi having an amazing intellect, but the guys needs to be challenged… Hence why he’s always staring out of the window during classes in Tri, daydreaming away to where the adventure is. He feels trapped, needs to be outside and should use his intelligence for things he finds important (like saving the digital world, soccer and saving friends and the world). The daydreaming could also be his Libra Mercury who can make Taichi lose his focus and could make him lazy. Luckily Taichi has a very active Aries Mars in opposite aspect from his Libra Mercury that neutralizes that lazy and dreamy Libra Mercury.

Okay, back to topic. Now you maybe think: But if Taichi is good in knowing where to go, being the fearless leader, also an intellect who has the knowledge to aim straight and shoot… then WHY is he so lost, down and in doubt in Tri and so unknowing of his future in Kizuna…??!! I have an answer to that. And that answer is his Libra Sun.

I know I know, this is a very VERY unpopular Sun sign to give this goggle leader, but please hear me out. For starters, Libra is the sign of diplomacy and if we believe the 02’s epilogue what’s Taichi’s job? Right, a diplomat. We also know he studies something like political sciences in Kizuna (which I think is AMAZING and vouches even more for Taichi’s intellect! Politics is a tough study…) and to make it in the political field you really do need diplomacy and charms.

Taichi is an absolute charmer, in my eyes at least. I mean, look at his 02 self! He’s such a smooth charmer in every way… The way he sends off Sora to Yamato while acting all cool and collected, phew, that requires some serious smoothness. And still we often see Taichi depicted as a down and broody boy besides his energetic and bold (sometimes indifferent…) character, especially after Tri. That too could be due to a Libra Sun placement.

Like Sagittarius is depicted by a centaur, Libra is depicted by scales and those scales are all about harmony, balance and justice. Libra is the opposite of Aries in the zodiac, but also about weighing opposites in the sigh itself. When we look at the Aries/Libra opposite placement: where Aries can be quite selfish, Libra as an opposite is the people’s pleaser. Where Aries is reckless and impatient, Libra is thoughtful and patient and one could say that an Aries acts where a Libra waits. Where Aries makes the impulsive decisions, Libra keeps deliberating leading into constant doubt and confusion. And how do we see Taichi in Tri? Ah yes, in doubt and confused.

A Libra Sun desperately wants to bring peace and harmony, driven by justice, in a diplomatic way. Libra Suns are deep thinkers which can make them very doubtful, making them spiraling down into a hole of overthinking and doubts. The Libra Sun-Sag Moon dynamic makes this all even more deep and almost philosophical in a way there will always be more and more questions, but never answers because Libra simply can’t make choices. All while being solution-oriented!

As Taichi grows up from a middle schooler to a high schooler, it’s that doubt coming from the Libra Sun that kicks Taichi hard. It conflicts with his carefree and bold Aries Rising nature and as that Libra Sun comes shining through, we see Taichi becoming more cautious and reserved compared to his younger self. The guy has a strong inner dialogue always looking for the best solutions to please everyone and bring harmony (I wanted to say ‘balance to the world’, yes to all the avatar the last airbender cameos) to the people and world(s in case of the digital world) around him he so desperately wants to protect. This is what we see happening in Tri, where he can’t choose what’s the right thing… Most of the time that inner dialogue is hidden behind his Aries Rising (and Aries Mars and Sag Moon).

So under that tough and courageous Aries Rising demeanor (remember that a Rising sign is all about engaging and how you come across to others) is a very soft, sweet, friendly and overall smart Libra Sun boy who has troubles expressing himself because the boy is in conflict with himself (which we see in the Dark Master’s arc in Adventure where he expresses his concerns towards his sister to Koushiro… it’s so hard for Taichi to let it all out, even when he needs it badly). It’s so sad, he’s such a complicated character, but that’s also one of the most beautiful things about Taichi. He’s layered af. He could be the best listener (Koushiro’s feels this, that’s why Koushiro can talk so open and freely to Taichi, because Taichi lets him thank you Libra Sun) if it weren’t for his strong fire placements opposite from his airy Sun sign. But give the boy time and space and he can show you his charms in a way no one else owns those charms.

So Taichi’s Libra Sun is hidden away most of the time due to his strong Aries placements. Usually his Rising and Sun sign being in opposite aspect from each other, should neutralize the placements, but Taichi’s Aries Mars placement makes the Aries Rising overrule the Libra Sun. Still, we shouldn’t forget Taichi is a softy with a big heart. He just needs the right people around him to get his charm on and Taichi definitely has some great people collected in his life who can help him think and make decisions.

A few things I want to point out before I stop rambling, because this analysis is already WAY too long.

Taichi’s midheaven in Capricorn in combination with his Libra Sun and Aries Rising makes him very ambitious on the intellectual side! Directly aiming for the UN and quickly climbing up the promotion ladder (and being successful like a true Cap, let’s not forget that).

His Mars was in transition from Pisces to Aries during his birth. Which means his Aries Mars is highly influenced by Pisces which could also explain why he spirals down as Pisces Mars has a lot of stormy energy on the emotional side (whereas Aries Mars has stormy energy on the physical side). When this emotional energy comes out negative, it can lead to mental health problems (!!! TRI DEPRESSED!TAICHI), especially when close friends and family (can you feel it coming? The whole Hikari-trauma is a thing) are involved.

His Libra Sun makes him in need of a group of friends and he loves being surrounded by them! Though he doesn’t like to admit that due to his Aries Rising. Taichi is such a conflicted boy…

An end note on these two boys: A heart to heart/hard friendship with a lot of mutual understanding and support <3

[chaolie]

Hi I read your Zombie and Gods Au (×3 times) a while ago (while I should be learning) and couldn't stop thinking about it.

You left story unsaid, so I have quite a lot questions

1. What is zombie like ? Can they save their human mindset ? Or mindlessly rambling around seeking brains ? Or they can parkour and hop around ?

2. Who is Overseer (?) Why they choose Jack even if they didn't seen him before ? And why they're complicated/tricky? Their morals is messed up and/or power they gave is tricky ?

3. Is SBI dynamic actual in fic ? And where is crazy british fish - haver ?

4. Also you (great author) told that u gonna bring Fundy back from afterlife. Is Dream somehow interfere or no ? Does he have revive book ?

Or or . . If I get it right Dream lives if he has his own will to live, so mini - theory time.

So maybe Dream after, Fundy becomes zombie, losses his own will to live and tries to end it all, XD sees it and gives him revive book (?).

I think it all the questions I have for now. Sorry for lots questions. You're really great at creating original and memorable Au's. Still remember "Unusual wonders of a hunted house", "Not too forgiving", "Never again" and "Three stages of falling".

Thank you for creating great FWT Au's.

Sincerely yours,

Random reader

(Wow again writing Essays instead of questions)

Hi!! Thank you so much for asking all these questions, I'm always excited to talk about my AUs!! Just a heads up, I had to write all this on mobile, so I probably made some mistakes. Also I hope that the read more works-

So!!

1. The zombies are pretty close to how they are in Minecraft, so they just walk around slowly, looking for anything that's alive. It's pretty easy to defeat one, but the trouble starts when there's more of them, and unfortunately, there's usually a lot! But luckily they can't really jump, do parkour, and things alike, that would make things much harder to survive! Also, zombies can't really keep their humanity, because after a person dies, they still go to the afterlife, their body just starts a life of its own.

2. So, about the Overseer(s)! They're not evil or anything, but I accidentally made them complicated. They're two separate entities, but at the same time, they're not? They got to pick their mortal as "one", but at the same time they're both gods of different things (will and persistence), but those things are pretty close so they could probably pass as one- so it's hard to explain if they're one or two beings. When it comes to their choice, they picked Jack because he just... Seemed like a good choice. That, and he was outside of the city when the apocalypse started, camping alone... So when they showed up to explain things to him, they didn't have to worry about a crowd gathering around them!

3. Yeah, it is! And assuming you meant Wilbur (if you didn't please let me know, I can elaborate on other characters too!), he used to live in a quieter part of the city. Tommy was living with him to study in the better schools, so when the zombies appeared, they tried to head to Phil's place as soon as they could. Luckily, since they were far from the city center, they managed to leave before things got too bad!

And to answer the 4th question, your theory was pretty close, actually!

Dream probably promised to "take care of things" after Fundy turned, but in that short moment before the body becomes a zombie, he changed his mind. Gave up, essentially, just hoping they could reunite again soon... And XD did notice. XD also happens to be the God who proposed the "my mortal will outlive your mortal" bet, so he had to do SOMETHING! So... He went to death and asked her to revive Fundy. What a great solution.

Death will agree, under some conditions. Don't get me wrong though, since Fundy asked to be back too, she absolutely wanted to do that! She just had to make sure he wouldn't die again anytime soon, so she wanted him as a second "chosen mortal" in return. That ended up in negotiations between all the gods, but in the end, they will all agree to let death revive Fundy! Under their own conditions, of course.

XD absolutely hated having to let everyone have something while all he got was "your mortal doesn't die", so he'll probably have to look into something like a revive book soon...

But yeah, Fundy gets revived just in time, so Dream stays alive too! And now they can try heading north again, looking for Fundy's previous group or any other friends they can find!

I'm seriously tired right now, but I'll try to list what each god got from their new deal tomorrow!

Also, thank you so much for this ask!! I love talking about my ideas, hearing theories about them, and knowing you remember my other AUs really made my day!! So thank you again!!

[amysubmits]

hi!! i have a question im not sure you'll be able to answer and if you can't thats okay!! i just really like how you explain things.

context: im in a d/s dynamic and me and my dom are both very busy people. im in college and work retail (as well as i am disabled+have adhd/anxiety). he is in the army and also college. we are long distance as well (he visits every few months)

question: i struggle a lot with falling out of the dynamic. when im stressed/overwhelmed following rules is really hard for me to do and every time we try to enforce them back i end up panicking and we stop again. they're basic rules too, self care related org*sm control/ask permission to play (nsfw) etc. I take out dynamic seriously like i know my place and i love his place in relation to me bur im struggling with this. its almost like theres a wall between me and submitting that i dont know how to get over, that wall being stress/life issues in general. im sorry this is so rambly, any advice would be greatly appreciated <3

-💜

Aww thanks :)

I haven't been in your shoes, and CD and I have very little experience with being physically separated. So definitely take this with a grain of salt but...

It sounds like you're having days where you're too overwhelmed to follow your rules so then you guys are stopping everything. Is that the case? If so, I wonder if trying to just request leniency from the rules, or perhaps asking to just take a break for that day, vs feeling like you have to stop for a longer period?

Another thing that come to mind would be trying to gain a deeper understanding of what is triggering that anxiety, and seeing if anything can be done to accommodate that. For example, if you were to determine that when you feel overwhelmed by submission, it is often correlated to feeling disconnected from your partner, then maybe finding ways to keep feeling connected would help, or something like that. This is just a random example, but in general I think if you can pinpoint what is triggering you to feel overwhelmed by submission, like what unmet need you have, that may help.

I also just want to say that it's understandable to struggle with D/s when you are stressed or anxious. I think it's common for subs to feel bad when submission is harder (or just plain too hard) but I don't think it's something we should feel bad about. People often talk about how it's best to wait to submit until after you have really 'discovered yourself' as a young adult because you have to understand your power before you can really give it to someone else. And I think somewhat related to that general idea, it's hard for many subs to give up power when we are feeling powerless due to our world being too stressful.

[hellroots]

『 MOBILE FRIENDLY RULES 』

— here you will find my rules or can also find them on my gdocs as well once i’m done with it. please like this if you read it, but otherwise don’t interact with this post, thank you. rest assured that i always read my moots rules before following and that i fully expect the same courtesy. i tried not to let them get too long but feel free to ask me anything you wanna know about them if it’s not clear ok?

 『 THE MUN』

NOXTROMUN, THEY/THEM, 21+, BRAZILIAN

shy but friendly ! i don't follow for follow, if i follow you that means i've read your rules and want to write with you. i have no triggers nor squicks of my own except drama in the dash, for that reason i do not engage in callouts/witch hunts and if you do it on a constant basis i might have to hard block you for my own peace of mind. although i may come off too strong/harsh, i am always up to talking things out privately. as long as you are civil, so am i. any form of hate will be deleted and blocked -  sometimes mocked, if i’m feeling cocky…

『 THE BLOG』

HELLROOTS, INDIE ( POTENTIALLY TRIGGERING AND NOT MINOR FRIENDLY ), HIGHLY SELECTIVE & PRIVATE MULTIFANDOM MULTIMUSE

primarily run on a low activity \ effort and with a slow speed.. my muselist changes a lot, depends a lot on what i’m watching lately so bear with me please. this is a drama free zone, therefore do realise that mun ≠ muses and (obviously) writing ≠ condoning !! as a quick note, do keep in mind that my blog is my safe space, just as your blog is yours - you are responsible for your own internet experience just as i am responsible for mine. should anything in my blog annoy/trigger/squick you, i strongly encourage you to block me & not write with me - your mental health is far more important ( for me, and hopefully for you as well ) than rp. on that note, please do not softblock me - that’s annoying, just hardblock please.

『 THE TRIGGERS』

TRIGGER HEAVY, PROPERLY TAGGED AND TAKING NO CRAP

i  usually  tend to write for trigger heavy fandoms (such as asoiaf, kingdom and others) and may incorporate some of it into my writing, muses' backgrounds and overall characterization. if you're bothered \ squicked \ triggered by that, i kindly encourage you to reconsider and not follow me. no amount of rp fun is worth your mental health.  i try to tag everything accordingly and i fully expect the same courtesy for our followers' sakes. be aware that there may be mentions of death, gore, violence, consanguinamory \ endogamy (especially when it comes to the lannisters and kekkei genkai clans), rape ( kingdom, though it will only be mentioned on the character’s backstory ) and cannibalism ( hannibal and kingdom ) , as well as unhealthy relationships and dynamics alongside with powerplay, and otherwise bad behaviours.  for all that is sacred, please, do note that i, the mun, do not approve, support or condone any of these actions or behaviours !!  i simply am capable of separating fiction from reality. as long as everything is properly tagged, with mutual consent and there are no minors involved (muse and especially not muns), . i support the right of a consenting adult to explore these awful dark topics in a safe fictional environment with other like minded consenting adults, people shouldn’t have to share their traumas to strangers on the internet to explain why they write what they write, be considerate. if that notion bothers you perhaps you might not want to interact with me, for both of ours sakes. fair warning, most of my graphics and aesthetics might trigger those who have xylophobia/hylophobia (phobia of trees or wooded areas), and considering it is a main theme here i will not be tagging it, i'm sorry. but its too many. however, if you want me to create a special tag for you, there's no issue! it will be either "[your mun name] don't look!" or "[your url] don't look!", whichever you prefer. QUICK EDIT/ADDITION: i do not believe that aging up fictional characters is inherently a bad thing - from what i understand, the whole appeal of aging up a character is that while you like their personality but you do not want them to be kids (for whatever reason) but insteasd adults. if you are one of those who think that aging up a character is automatically something bad (without even knowing why it was done in the first place) don’t bother following me because i do think that opinion is quite silly.

『 THE INTERACTIONS』

OC, DUPLICATE, MULTIMUSE AND CANON DIVERGENT FRIENDLY

my tagging system is simple, i tag triggers as "tw; x" and . images that may be sensitive or triggering as "cw; x". you can further see how my tags work by taking a look at my tag dump post, just search ‘tag dump’ on my blog and you will find the most recent one i’m using.    i shitpost and talk oocly on the dash constantly but you can easily blacklist my tag if it bothers you.  here's something you should know about me:  when i'm doing drafts i usually don't feel like chatting much, so please do not spam me because i won't be able to reply, i love to talk with my moots but sometimes it overwhelms me.  on that note, please don't pester me for replies ic or ooc, i am slow and chances are that if you try to guilt trip me or just nag me about it i'll leave as the ones i'll get to in the later end on purpose, just out of spite. yes, i be like that.   please be patient - i’ll never pressure you and expect the same in return.  plotting wise: i prefer to just wing it with just a faint idea of where to take the thread but honestly i'm cool with anything. please be considerate when formatting your replies, i have a bad eyesight & if i can't read it, i won't bother with it.   my own formatting is simple and clean.   on a smaller note, please bear with me and my muses as my muses ramble a lot but you don't have to match the length, just give me something to work with. if we write together, the chances of me making edits/tagging you in stuff are really big, just lmk if you don’t like that though !

『 THE FLEET』

MOSTLY BI/PAN MUSES, MULTISHIP AND MULTIVERSE, SMUT FRIENDLY

i love shipping but i like my ships to be devices to move the plot/dynamics/muses forward, every once in a while though i partake in some much loved self indulgent shipping. just because i ship a certain pairing don't presume that my characters are approaching yours with second intentions, please.   most of the time i like to reblog those relationship memes, so if you’re interested in a ship the best way (other than  sending me a message ofc) to let me know is by sending ones. there will be some triggering ships here ( like the lannisters, both cersei x jaime and joanna x tywin are my otps, and potential inter clan ships, like with the hyugas - i mean how the hell you think they keep the byakugan in their family?? ) that may either be played with trusted friends or be mentioned/reblogged sometimes, all properly tagged so you can easily blocklist/avoid it.  most of my muses are either bi or pan, those who are not will be specified. don't be afraid to reach out to me for shipping right off the bat - i'd rather have you to be open and honest with me about the interactions you want than lying to me, just know that there will be needed some plotting and threading first to see if your muses match. as an adult, my blog is smut friendly, i partake in sexual sunday a lot because some of my muses are very lewd in nature, you can blacklist my tag if that bothers you as well.

『 THE FINAL NOTES』

GENERAL RP ETIQUETTE APPLIES, CREDITS, THANK YOU FOR READING MY RULES

lastly but not least, general rp etiquette applies on my blog: no godmodding, forced ships, etc. there’s only ONE thing that truly makes me go apeshit crazy, and it’s when people don’t read my rules. i ALWAYS find out and it’s not pretty; i block it like it’s hot, ♪ ♫ ♬ block it like it’s hot ♪ ♫ ♬.   i strongly assure you that i always read your rules before both following you and also before sending memes, just in case. on a much smaller note, i’m not so hot on single shipping and i really feel weirded out about people forcing me to pic who i’m going to interact with due to theirs DNI’s. while i get DNI’s when it comes to actual predators, when it’s something seemingly random chances are that i’ll softblock you because it weirds me out how volatile some can be when it comes to a hobby. i have some trigger heavy hcs ( for example, the one about jiraiya’s hypersexuality being rooted in trauma that he suffered at a young age ) that i share with only a few muns that are closer with me, so i’ll be mentioning them every once in a while but won’t share them, please don’t insist.  i don’t really like most of the main characters of the franchises i write for, and when it comes to certain characters  i reserve the right to decline an rp for my own comfort. for further info on what i use to make my graphics please check my “CREDITS.” tag.  most of my stuff is made by me, i’ve got a lowkey rph in case you wanna check it out it’s @brazucahelps, however if you want a custom content i can see if i get a free time to come up with something :D

 IF YOU READ THIS FAR, THANK YOU SO MUCH — JUST ONE LAST THING, COULD YOU PLS LIKE THIS SO I KNOW YOU’VE READ IT? <3 THANKS!

[tra-sh]

Mine to Hold (Bucky Barnes ABO)

Bucky comes back from Wakanda and you feel different around him. What's your solution? Avoid him until it goes away. This doesn't go over well with him.

Sometimes, on days like today, you find yourself staring out over your surroundings and wondering: how exactly did you get here? When people you where you work, you would answer “Stark Industries,” and nothing more. When those same people inquired who you work for, they would receive a tight-lipped smile, and perhaps a “Tony Stark,” laced with sarcasm. After all, how could you explain to the public that you worked for the Avengers? It was much easier and less exasperating to give a little white lie. You couldn’t even begin to imagine the hoards of fans who would follow you to work or try to convince you to slip them a photo of a sleeping Thor.

You'd long forgotten how you had ended up in this position, but you couldn’t imagine working anywhere else. You spent most of your time working with Dr. Banner, helping in the lab, and performing first aid on missions. Of course, you'd needed combat training, which the team was more than happy to provide. You had been afraid when you presented as an Omega a few years back, but nothing changed in the tower dynamic. No one treated you as if you were a fragile little doll, ready to break with the slightest touch.

You felt as though you were going against your biology and stepping out of the pack mentality-- and hell if it wasn’t thrilling. However, the doting and motherly nature of the Omega would often rear its head in regards to your team. The longer you worked with everyone, the more protective you felt over them. You would flit about nervously if one of them was on a dangerous mission, and launch a frenzy of panicked questions while checking them for injuries upon their return. It wasn’t too bad with the Alphas (Natasha, Steve, and Thor), but you couldn’t stop yourself from worrying over Clint and Bruce (Betas), and Tony who was the only other Omega in the tower. When Peter Parker began to visit, You'd guarded him almost immediately. You would coo over him and dote on the boy, and he would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy it. Peter had yet to emerge into a class, but You secretly hoped he would be an Omega like you and Tony. The tower was constantly full of competing Alpha pheromones and it was very overwhelming at times.

Yes, it was times like these where you looked at your current life and smile. You felt so at home here, and the Avengers were nothing more than family to you.

You walk into the living room and laugh softly at the group that had congregated in front of the TV. Tony was showing Thor the movie Wall-E, and the others had most likely filed in one by one and sat down. There were also times when you felt like a glorified babysitter. You step down into the living room, heels clicking against the hardwood floor. In addition to working the med-bay on missions, you often helped Pepper with the more official side of Stark Industries. You couldn't help but feel bad for the overworked Beta and assisted her as often as you could. She'd learned rather quickly that Tony listened to you more than her anyways.

“Tony?” You ask quietly. You rest your hand on his shoulder to get his attention.

Tony’s head lulls back, his eyes still trained on the cartoon robot in front of him. You roll your eyes and snort.

“You have a meeting today at 6:00? New York Times interview, remember?”

Tony made a strangled heave as if signaling to you that he didn’t want to go. “I know you don’t want to, but this is the one we’ve rescheduled three times already,” you point out. Tony groans as his head falls back to hit the couch. “Can’t they find some other superhero to interview? How about Ant-man? He has nothing better to do,” Tony offered. You shake your head and sigh. “I’m absolutely telling Henry you said that, and they specifically want to do an article on Iron man,” you remind him.

Tony was about to protest when F.R.I.D.A.Y interrupts. “Sir? James Barnes is at the entrance.” You can't help the fluttering in your stomach as you resist the urge to look at the elevator. Bucky is back?

Tony shot up off the couch grinning ear to ear. “Oh darn! I forgot our dear little soldier's mission ended this week! Guess we’ll have to cancel that appointment?” He feigned disappointment, shooting you a pleading look. You glare at him but eventually give in with a sigh. “You can explain to Pepper why I’m canceling. I’m not taking the fall for this one,” you mutter and pull out your phone. Tony cheered as he sauntered out of the room, presumably to greet the new guest. You hold your phone up to your ear and crane your neck as subtly as you can manage to try to catch a glimpse of the winter soldier. "Hello?" Pepper's voice carries through the speaker, catching you off guard.

"Oh! Hey, Pepper, sorry if I'm interrupting," you apologize quickly. "Not at all. Is something going on?" Pepper asks. You don't usually call her unless there's bad news coming. You spare a glance over to the elevators. "Yes, I'm afraid Tony is very adamant about not going to the New York Times interview today," you explain. Pepper makes a strangled sort of noise over the phone. Uh oh, she's really pissed. "And why exactly does Tony not want to go this time?" Pepper asks, trying to mask the edge to her tone.

Before you can answer, Tony strolls back into the living room with a very shy brunette in tow. Nat and Steve are the first to welcome him back. You feel your throat clench as you stare at him. To say Bucky was an attractive man would be a deplorable understatement. While his body language was very closed off and introverted, he dripped Alpha pheromones. Stupid Omega brain, you think to yourself. You and Bucky were fairly good friends, you'd say. You two would sit in comfortable silence with each other when he wasn't on missions, reading books or making small talk. You knew Bucky was put off by the social ranks, and you were scared for a while that he would avoid you after you presented an Omega. But your relationship stayed fairly stable much to your delight.

When Bucky's scent filled your nostrils and you felt a soothing calm wash over you. He smells like freshly ground coffee, cinnamon, and something earthy- like sage or myrrh. As embarrassing as it was to admit, his smell made you feel grounded and safe. "Hello?" Pepper wondered. 

"Right! Sorry, Pepper, actually Tony is here now if you'd like to speak with him," you offer, turning back towards him. Tony blanched and began to shake his head vigorously. You grin deviously at him before thrusting the phone in his hand. "You're the worst- Hey Pepper!" Tony quickly switches to his charming personality, making a beeline out of the living room so no one can hear her yell at him.

You laugh and turn around to look back in the living room. Bucky turns to look at you and gives you a gentle smile, making your stomach perform flips. He lumbers over to where you stand, looking down. "Hey, doll," he greets quietly. You can't help the smile that ghosts across your lips as you stare up at him. Were his eyes always that blue? You try to shake the thought from your mind. "Hi, Buck," you reply. "How was your mission?" You ask quickly, trying to maintain the conversation. Was it always this hard for you to talk to him? "Not too bad," he mumbles. "Shuri says hi."

You perk up at this and beam at him. "You saw her? How is she? Is everyone doing okay?" You can't stop the ramblings as they spill from your lips. Bucky laughs and you feel a hot blush creep up your neck. "Too much?" You ask cautiously. He shakes his head and rests a hand on your shoulder. "Just enough," he says. Your stomach clenches as you look at him. His peaceful smile, the way your skin tingles under his grip. You felt strange and it was beginning to poke and prod at your fight or flight response. "I have to go help Doctor Banner," you say quickly before excusing yourself from the room. Your heart was beating fast and your face felt hot. What was happening to you? Bucky watched you leave, a frown tugging at his lips.

"So, are you going to tell me what's wrong?" Bruce asks after a while.

Your head snaps up and you stare at him. "What?" You ask dumbly. He scoffs and places his coffee mug down on a nearby desk. "You reek," he points out. You flush and realize he's right; you're putting out distress pheromones. You sigh and move to sit down on the small lounge chair Tony had brought into the lab. Bruce often worked well into the night, so the lab also functioned as a living space.

"Bucky's back," you say hesitantly.

Bruce sits next to you quietly, urging you to continue. "It feels different," you tell him. "Like, before I could ignore his scent and everything and be close you know? But now it's like my brain wants me to jump his bones," you prattle off, your face growing redder with each confession. Bruce listens patiently, waiting for you to finish. "Well, it sounds to me like you've chosen Barnes as a potential mate," he says. You feel your body go rigid as you stare at your friend in shock.

"What?"

Bruce leans back on the couch, deep in thought. "Sometimes Omegas will seek out and choose a mate out of a group of Alphas," he explains. "It's not uncommon, although today you don't really see Omegas taking the initiative. Your body is trying to claim Bucky."

You shoot up from the couch, stumbling away from Bruce as he speaks. "No, no no-- I can't claim Bucky!" You shrill. Bruce sighs and walks over to you. He puts his hands on your shoulders in an attempt to calm you down. Betas weren't as commanding as Alphas, but his presence still helped to decrease your heart rate. "I'm afraid it's not up to you," Bruce says quietly. "Your brain chose Bucky and it's not going to let go of him unless the Alpha rejects the claim."

Your body shivers at the idea of Bucky rejecting you. Why does it make you so sad? Despair rolls off you in waves, making Bruce flinch. "I'm sorry, kiddo," he adds. "Is there something you can do? Raise the dose of my suppressants?" You ask hopefully. Bruce sighs, dropping his hands. "That's too dangerous. It could make you miss your heat for a prolonged amount of time, which would only make matters worse," he explains. You look at the ground and feel your eyes sting with unwelcome tears.

What were you supposed to do now?

Over the next few days, you fall into a carefully planned routine. You've discovered that if you only see Bucky in short bursts of time, it's easier for you to suppress the Omega instincts. You sit with him and talk to him for a few moments at a time, before finding some excuse to leave. Although you try to convince yourself it's the right thing to do, it gets progressively harder and harder for you to leave.

Everyone in the tower has noticed your behavior; especially Bucky. He saw through your excuses almost immediately, and it made his stomach sink. He couldn't help the ill-placed thought that you no longer wanted to be around him. He was the only one in the tower that you would avoid and he didn't like it. He almost growled when he saw you train with Sam instead of him. Since when were you so close to Sam?

Bucky didn't realize he was sitting on the couch pouting until Steve came over. "Jesus, Buck," Steve said. "It reeks in here." Bucky's lips pulled into a snarl as he glared at Steve. The blonde super soldier raised a brow at his friend's actions. Since when did Bucky act like this? "You're acting like a lovesick pup," Steve points out. Bucky grumbles something under his breath, looking away.

Why was he acting like this? He wasn't even sure. Bucky feels so on edge like the slightest movement will set him off. It's unfamiliar to him, and he hates it. "I know," he sighs after a moment. "I don't know why." Bucky looks up to Steve with an exasperated expression. Steve hums quietly and sits on the chair across from the winter soldier. "It wouldn't have anything to do with the Omega you're so close with, would it?" Bucky's grip on his metal arm tightens.

"She's avoiding me," Bucky mutters. Steve looks away, his eyes scanning the living room for any unwanted ears. He's noticed your new attitude towards Bucky, but Steve wasn't as naive. He knew mating behavior when he saw it, considering how Tony had acted before they claimed one another. "Have you tried asking her?" Steve wonders. Bucky scoffs and his grip gets tighter. "She won't stay long enough for me to try," he growls. The more he thinks about you and Sam the angrier he gets. Steve smells the anger and tries to suppress his Alpha instinct to fight. He clears his throat, looking at Bucky. "Buck, you need to talk to her. You can't just sit here and stink up the place. You're not the only Alpha in the tower," Steve reminds him. He gets up and leaves the living room quickly, trying to clear his head. Bucky sighs, looking down at his feet.

How would he talk to you if you wouldn't stick around long enough to get a word in?

Bucky stands outside your door, hesitating. He's been in here before, sure. But that was before you'd started avoiding him. He debates turning around and leaving. The last thing Bucky wanted was to fuel your hatred toward him. He felt something in his chest tighten at that thought. Did you hate him? He pushed the thought away and steeled his mind, trying to focus through the Alpha thoughts telling him to find you and take what's his. He knocked softly at the door and waited. No response came, making Bucky frown. Were you still in the gym? He chewed his lip nervously. Were you with Sam?

Bucky felt a possessive surge in his brain at the thought of you training with Sam for over two hours. He pushed his way into the room and looked around. His eyes fell on the bed and he froze.

He stared at the nest of fluffed pillows and clothing on your bed, placed in such a way that there was a little divot in the middle for you to curl up in. He felt something snap in his brain as he looked at the nest with white-hot anger.

Whose clothes had you taken? Who were you nesting with?

He stormed closer to the bed until a familiar scent hit him like a wall. He blinked, staring at the mound of pillows before him. Were those... his? He stared at a familiar pair of sweatpants and a balled-up t-shirt. Did you bring his clothes into your nest? Your safe space? This realization made Bucky's chest flutter. His scent was all over the pillows and sheets, and it made his pride soar. You wanted him in your safe place; he was comforting to you. Bucky couldn't help the smug grin that danced across his lips. Well, now he knew you didn't hate him at least. But why would you avoid him? Bucky decided at that moment that he needed to talk with you- whether you wanted to or not.

Bucky paced around the tower, brows knit together in concern. No one had seen you for a few hours. Where had you gone? Did you leave because of him? To make matters worse, you weren't answering your phone.

Bucky glanced around anxiously. He debated running around the city to look for you, but where would he even start? F.R.I.D.A.Y didn't even know your location. Why was no one else panicking? The elevator in the middle of the floor dinged and Bucky immediately looked up. You walked into the tower looking down at your phone in shock. '23 missed calls from Jon Snow'. You felt your face grow hot as you try to ignore the fluttering in your chest. Why did Bucky call you 23 times? He never used his phone unless it was for emergencies. You look up and freeze in your spot. Bucky is standing in front of the elevator, staring at you like a man in the desert would an oasis. You felt your knees grow weak at the desperation in his gaze. "Bucky?"

He's about to question you when an unpleasant smell wafts through his nose. You shrink back at the anger that settles on his features. Was he upset with you?

Bucky glares at your neck, where the unfamiliar smell is coming from. Why did you smell like an Alpha? Had someone scented you? It didn't smell like anyone he knew and it made his blood boil. "Who did it?" Bucky growls after a pause. Your brows knit together in confusion. Who did what? You wrack your brain for what he could be upset about when suddenly it clicks in your mind. "Bucky, it was--" Before you can finish your sentence, Bucky whisks you away to the sleeping quarters. A started noise leaves your lips as he heaves you over one shoulder effortlessly.

Bucky carries you swiftly into his room, dropping you on the bed like a rag doll. "Bucky," you begin again only to be interrupted by the Alpha crawling over you. He pins you down to the bed and brings his head to your neck. You shudder and present your scent gland to him almost immediately. Bucky preens at this and happily marks you. He does it over and over until your own smell is barely a whisper. You know you're practically dripping in Bucky's scent, and something in your brain sighs happily as if to say, 'more!'

He seems satisfied with his work and looks up to your flushed face. You can't help the purr that slips out of you as you look at the proud Alpha above you. Your body feels light and airy as if you're floating. A languid smile drifts across your lips as you stare at Bucky. He sits up, dragging you forward so you rest on his lap. "My 'mega," he mutters under his breath. You preen at the claim, nuzzling your nose against his cheek.

"If you've gotten that out of your system, can I explain now?" Bucky nods begrudgingly, making you chuckle. You lean forward and place a soft kiss on his forehead. "I was with Pepper at a meeting for a new Stark Industries internship program," you begin. "One of the interns was nervous and accidentally scented while I was next to him."

Bucky frowned. If you were with Pepper, why didn't anyone tell him? "Who knew you left?" Bucky asks, rubbing his chin on your shoulder absentmindedly. "I told Tony," you say, pausing to think. "Tony and Steve."

Bucky curses under his breath. This was probably Steve's way of making him talk to her. You look at him, your heart swelling in your chest. Had he been worried? Why did that make you so happy? Bucky pulls away and you whine at the loss of his warmth. "We need to talk," Bucky says finally. You feel a rush of dread pool in your stomach but you manage to nod.

"You've been avoiding me." You look away and bite your lip. You knew he would notice eventually, but it still made you nervous. "I know," you whisper. You feel guilt settle in the pit of your stomach and you sigh. You should have told him sooner but you were just too afraid of what he'd say.

"I saw your nest," Bucky adds.

Your face flushes as you look at him in shock. "You did?" You squeak. Bucky nods, looking you in your eyes. "Why were you avoiding me?" He asks. You look down and sigh softly. "I, um," you fumble over your words as you try to think. "I might have-- unknowingly-- claimed you?" You say awkwardly. Bucky feels his stomach flip at your confession. "Did you not want to?" Bucky whispers. "No! I do!" You say quickly, before realizing your words. Your face turns pink as Bucky raises a brow at you. "I know you weren't exactly thrilled about the classes, and I was afraid you'd reject me," you murmur. "Oh, doll," Bucky sighs, leaning forward. He places a kiss on your cheek and you feel his stubble scratch against your skin. "I was worried that you wouldn't like me as an Alpha," he admits. "I didn't want you to think I was just some knot-head looking for a rut." You're quick to shake your head and look up at him with a reassuring smile. "Bucky, I could never think that about you," you say quietly.

He hums in appreciation and peppers your face with light kisses. Your chest flutters at the affection and you turn your head to nuzzle his face with your own. A pleasant silence falls over the room, and you swear you can hear your heartbeat pounding away. Bucky's arms tighten around your frame, holding you close. You reach up timidly and rest your palms on his chest. A small smile ghosts over your lips when you feel his heartbeat speed up at your touch. Bucky leans down and places a gentle kiss on your shoulder, closing his eyes. "Mine," he whispers.

You feel your chest swell with pride and you can't help the grin that takes over your features. You plant a loving kiss against his hair and wrap your arms tightly around his shoulders.

"Yours."

[miss-noo-na]

And Then There Were Three (Part 5)

Title: And Then There Were Three

Rating: Mature.

Warnings: Smut; rough sex, dirty talk (vulgar language this chapter), choking

Summary: After catching you with Jooheon, Changkyun becomes distant. You’re determined to find out if he’s as jealous as you think he is.

Note: See masterlist for parts 1-4!

Just as you were able to read the shifts in Jooheon’s moods, you could do the same with Changkyun, but he was less subtle about it.

There was a heat that radiated off of him when you came near, and not the kind you were used to. His tone was deep and curt when you spoke at work, though it wasn’t unusual to appear casual in your professional environment. But this was different. This read like anger.

You hadn’t had the chance to be alone with him since he walked in on you and Jooheon at the dorm. Their schedule was getting hectic again and they barely had the time to breathe, much less do anything else. 

“Do you think he’s avoiding me?” You asked Jooheon in a hushed tone as you stood at the back of the room, looking busy with accessories.

Jooheon shrugged, feigning ignorance, but when he glanced at his friend you could see his gears turning.

“If he was upset about it, I feel like he would tell us. He’s not exactly shy about his feelings.” Jooehon offered with a small, reassuring laugh. 

“Has he said anything to you?”

“Not really.”

You sighed, knowing you would have to bring it up to him eventually.

For now, you focused on your job, or at least tried to. Every day, you asked yourself if this was a mistake, if all the fun was worth the turmoil you might find yourself in if someone got too jealous. You didn’t understand why now, when he had never once expressed even a hint of it before. He made it apparent since day one that it was exclusively physical, and he didn’t even bat an eye at sharing you with his best friend and co-worker. If anyone should be okay with it, it would be him.

There was more to it than that, though. You couldn’t help but think back to what it felt like being alone with Jooheon, his care and precision, his tenderness and his words. He didn’t treat you like a thing to be discarded and it was becoming apparent that you were more than a physical fancy to him. 

He could hardly help himself sometimes. The way that Changkyun felt compelled to seduce and play with you, Jooheon often had to stop himself from being too affectionate. It was getting to the point that the others teased him about it, and that didn’t help your situation with Changkyun one bit.

The worst part was that you liked it. You blushed and felt the slightest hint of butterflies from time to time that you put a great deal of energy into squashing. Catching feelings was the last thing you needed, and you were convinced it was only because it had been so long since you felt something other than lust. Plus, there was this profound sense of guilt you had for it, like you were cheating on Changkyun somehow.

Just as you were formulating a plan for how to approach him, you received a message out of the blue. He would be alone tonight and he wanted you to come over. The abrupt and welcoming message threw you off-guard, but you happily accepted the invitation. 

When he invited you in, his cold demeanor hadn’t changed much, and you wondered what his intentions were. You were anxious, watching him put something on the TV and meander around the kitchen before coming to sit next to you. He was surprisingly relaxed,  but you could feel the invisible wall he put up, even if he didn’t realize it.

“Are we going to talk?” You asked after a few minutes of silence.

“About what?” He asked almost too quickly in response. His gaze was hard-set into you as he turned and you felt challenged. That’s when the fear started to dissipate and boil up into anger. You had nothing to be sorry for.

“You know, I don’t appreciate all this attitude you’ve been throwing at me lately.” You said sternly, and you could tell he didn’t anticipate push-back this early into the conversation.

“I’ve barely spoken to you.” He laughed, and there was something smug about it that only pushed you further. You remembered being in relationships in the past and just knowing that a fight was brewing, and this was exactly like that.

“You’ve been passive-aggressive for over a week now, will you just tell me what's wrong?” You sighed, already exasperated. You thought being in a physical relationship only meant that you could escape these kinds of conversations. Apparently not.

 He turned away and you could see his jaw tighten, like he was holding back.

“Is it about me and Jooheon?” You asked, knowing that was the only thing it could be.

He looked back again just as quickly, eyes narrowed. “Maybe it is, but what does it matter?”

Finally, something you could work with.

“You couldn’t just tell me you were jealous?”

He laughed, “Who said that?”

“Oh my God,” You rolled your eyes and reacted with your entire body. “This is exhausting, why are men such babies about everything? Just communicate like an adult, Jesus. Why are we even fighting? We’re not married, this is pointless.” You rambled, not even looking at him because you were lost in your own frustration. When you stopped, he was half-smiling at you.

“I like when you get all flustered.”

You blinked and closed your mouth, then scowled as the words sunk in. “What?”

“You’re right, there’s nothing to fight about. I got a little upset about it, so what?”

“Oh, so you’re admitting it now?”

He edged himself across the couch so he was closer to you. “Fine, you want the truth?”

“Preferably,” You nodded.

“It wasn’t anything as petty as jealousy, I don’t get jealous.”

You narrowed your eyes, unsure what to make of his response, but curious to let him continue.

“I felt something different, and I didn’t really know how to process it quite yet, so I took some time to myself to think about it.”

He reached up and ran a finger from underneath your chin across your jaw line, his eyelids hanging low. You felt your heart rate speed up and cursed yourself for it.

“And what was that?” You asked quietly.

“I felt, hmm,” He mused for a moment before grinning. “Possessive.”

You swallowed the sound that threatened to part from your lips. Instead meeting it was an inquisitive “Oh?”

“I don’t own you.” He clarified, then let his eyes drift down, “But I do, don’t I?”

It was all part of the game. Realistically, out in the waking world, you were two capable adults with independent minds and the freedom to feel and do as you pleased. But once the door closed and you were under him, you knew you would let him do almost anything. It was the dynamic you both agreed upon from the first night, letting go of your inhibitions and self-imposed restraints and letting him have the control. It was the thing you longed for, the thing that kept you coming back to him.

“I’m a rational person, so I knew I couldn’t just be upset with you over something so normal and something you have every right to do.” He explained, then his voice deepend as he leaned in closer, “But I also couldn’t help picturing all the ways I was going to make you mine again.”

That word, mine, echoed in your head. Someone else had also uttered it to you in a moment of passion recently, and it sent a shiver down your spine. You had two people who seemed to want you desperately, and while you knew logically this was dangerous, it also excited you.

“You put me through all this just to tell me something I already knew?” You asked, and he smiled. 

“Would an apology help?”

You thought about it for a moment before answering. “I think that’s fair.”

He took you swiftly by the wrist and stood up, tugging you along. You fumbled for a moment before you stood and let him lead you to his bedroom.

You barely had time to process what was happening, one minute arguing on the couch and now here he was sitting you down on the edge of the bed, leaning down and kissing you before he knelt on the floor in front of you.

“What are you doing?” You asked, his hands trailing up your bare calves, up to your knees where the bottom of your skirt stopped and rested over your thighs. He then gripped your legs and pulled them up off the ground, causing you to lose balance and fall back onto the bed with a squeak. He pushed your legs open and the skirt fell back, too, exposing what was underneath.

“I’m apologizing.”

The initial shock wore off and you felt your cheeks warm as he laid a hand over your clothed center and pressed, teasing you for a moment before slipping his fingers underneath and feeling between your folds.

“Hm, you’re already wet but I know you can do better than that.”

He gripped the fabric and pulled it hard, forcing your legs up and together to rid you of the garment. When you let them fall back on either side of him, he wasted no more time, pushing your thighs apart and ducking his head down to taste you.

A sharp moan left you without warning and your hands fell to his hair. It had been a long time since he’d done this, and you almost forgot what his tongue felt like bearing down on your clit, rolling over the flesh and sucking you into his mouth. Changkyun abandoned this stimulation to travel downward, and you gasped unexpectedly when his tongue forced its way inside you, hands pressing back on your thighs to get deeper. Your fingers gripped his locks tight as you arched back and almost couldn’t take it. 

He pulled back for a moment, mouth glistening as he observed you, a low satisfied hum emanating from his chest.

“Look at what I do to you, you’re a mess.”

You blushed and closed your eyes tightly, feeling both aroused and embarrassed, and could only moan in response.

“Turn around.”

His voice was gruff as he stood up, and you let your feet fall gently to the floor as you sat up and stared up at him in awe for a moment. He was undoing his belt, looking down at you as he licked your juices off his lips.

“You heard me.”

You quivered as you went to turn over, and as your knees hit the bed he was already yanking the skirt and the rest of your clothing off you. Suddenly you were naked, kneeling on your hands and knees and arching your hips up as you peered back over your shoulder. 

He had discarded his own clothing and took his hard cock into one hand, stepping forward and deliberately brushing it against your entrance. You mewled and pressed back, trying to let him enter you, but he resisted.

“Do you want it bad?” He asked with a smirk.

You thought about making a sarcastic remark, knowing he was enjoying playing this game with you, but instead you countered him the only way you knew would actually make a blow to him.

You reached back and pulled yourself open, biting your lower lip and giving him a wanton yet demure stare. “Yes, please.”

His eyes darkened and the smile fell away from his face, he let out a rough, low sound as he grabbed your hips and aligned his cock with you. 

“I know I’m not the only person who can turn you on,” He started before leaning forward, sinking his cock deep into you just as he grabbed a handful of your hair and pulled your head back so his lips came as close as they could to your ear, “But I’m the only person who can give it to you like this.”

With that, his hips snapped into a pounding rhythm, fucking you like only he could, hard but with intent, making you grip the sheets in your hands and your legs to tremble. This was the moment when you were his, when he made it clear you belonged to him, at least for right now, and you embraced it. You craved it.

The harder he fucked you the weaker you became, arms starting to wobble in an attempt to hold yourself up. His thrusts were unrelenting, like he had been storing up all his energy just for this moment. 

The hand that still held your hair dropped down to your shoulder and he stopped briefly to pull you up. You wavered, dazed and shaky as you fell back against his chest and his arms circled under yours. One came up to lock your throat in his hand, and the other forced itself between your thighs, slick with your arousal. You groaned and arched against him, not sure which one you liked better.

Then he started to move again, thrusting up into you steadily, burying his cock to the hilt before letting gravity pull him back out just to do it again. His fingertips found your clit and he rubbed circles around the wet, swollen flesh as his other hand tightened around your neck.

“All of this is mine,” Changkyun growled against your ear. “Your body, your pleasure, your cunt. I own this.”

He was always rough, always commanding and always made you feel like you were his, but this was different. Unlike his typical playful candor, he sounded serious. The passion and possessiveness was overwhelming, somehow equal parts terrifying and exhilarating and you didn’t even consider stopping. Instead, his consuming words rasped heavily into your ear were pushing you toward a toe-curling, full body orgasm you couldn’t stop even if you wanted to.

You felt so exposed like this, nothing to hold on to, so you reached back and dug your nails into his thighs as your pleasure mounted. 

“I can’t,” You near-sobbed, trying to tell him you couldn’t hold on anymore.”I’m-it’s too much.”

He knew, he could read your body like the back of his hand; your shallow breaths and clenching muscles, slurred words, all tell-tale signs that your end was near. 

“Don’t hold back,” He said through his teeth, “Give me what's mine. Come for me.”

You sucked in a lungful of air as your eyes slammed shut, body pulling taut, then released it all in a long moan, bowing into him, squirming in his arms as you pulsed around his cock and sank your nails deeper in his skin. As you rode the last wave, he released you, letting you fall forward onto the bed and grabbing onto your hips to pull you flush against his pelvic bone, spluttering moans against the back of your neck as he came deep inside you.

You couldn’t hold yourself up anymore, collapsing face first on the bed and wrapping your arms under your head, breathing hard and dripping sweat. Changkyun managed to hold himself over you, but rested his forehead between your shoulder blades and panted against your moist skin.

He finally pulled himself from you and fell heavy on the bed next to you, and you peered up from over your arm.

“Sorry,” He mumbled, eyes glassy as he stared up at the ceiling, trying to control his pounding heart.

“For what?” 

“I kind of got out of hand there,” He rolled his head toward you and forced an awkward laugh. 

“It’s okay,” You rolled over on your side facing him, cheeks tinged with pink. “I liked it.”

The humor eased from his features as he looked at you for a long moment. “Can I tell you something?”

“Of course.”

“I sort of lied earlier,”

“Oh?” You gave him a curious look, though you could guess what he was going to say.

“I may have actually been a little jealous. I was just trying to save face before.”

“I mean, the way you just fucked me made that abundantly clear.”

For the first time in all the times you had been with Changkyun, he blushed.

“I didn’t want to be petty about it, I don’t know what came over me.” He looked away. “It was fine when it was the three of us, it felt more like Jooheon was just an addition to something you and I already had. But when I saw just the two of you….” He trailed off with a sigh.

You couldn’t help but smile a little bit, it was nice to see him vulnerable for once. 

“How did it happen?” He asked suddenly, looking back at you with a sense of urgency, to your surprise.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean did you call him? Did he call you? I’m curious.” He said, trying to seem vaguely interested but you already knew it was more than that. You decided to humor him.

“I came over to talk to him. He had been acting distant, as you recall, and I wanted to know why.” You answered with a half shrug.

“Why was he distant?”

“Same reason you were. Feeling a little jealous and being too proud to just talk to me about it.” You smiled and he had a laugh at himself.

“This is going to sound weird, and probably selfish, but..” He faded out, waiting to continue. 

“But?” You encouraged.

“What does he have that I don’t? I mean, what does he do, that makes you want to be with him?”

You hadn’t expected that question, but it did seem natural now that he asked it. His ego was hurt, he was used to being the one who satisfied you, the one you came running to for your urges. 

“It’s...different with him. Not necessarily better, just different.” You tried to explain.

“Care to elaborate?” He asked, becoming visibly antsy to find out.

“I don’t know, he’s ...tender.” You struggled to find the words. “It’s not rough but it's passionate. And it’s not boring, but it's kind of soft and makes me feel precious.”

Changkyun’s face looked troubled as you spoke. “That makes sense.”

“Like I said, it’s not better. I like what you and I have, but sometimes I just want-”

“You want to feel loved.”

You blinked at him in surprise. The word love was troublesome to you. You had thought you were in love, once. It was foolish and naive and ended terribly, so you decided you would avoid those feelings if at all possible. But maybe he was right? Maybe you missed that feeling. But that didn’t mean you were in love, or that Jooheon-

“Jooheon is in love with you.” He spoke bluntly, cutting off your thoughts. Now your eyes widened even more and you spluttered out a laugh. “What? No…”

“He hasn’t told me or anything, but I can tell.”

You couldn’t believe that at all. Maybe he had a crush on you, but love?

“The problem is,” Changkyun reached out and pushed a stray piece of hair away from your eyes.

 “I think I might be, too.”