#terrain from trash

[sjcraftingworld]

Terrain Tutorial - Zone Mortalis Tiles Side Walls

[rollofthed1ce]

Ok so I accidentally deleted an ask but it mainly about this:

In “One Man’s Trash, is Another Man’s Treasure”, what if the ancients found Y/N instead of Sea Fairy?

Now, Yandere or not, they’d all be worried about you and your current state. But unlike Sea Fairy, you actually resist when you managed to regain consciousness. But they had very different reactions

Pure Vanilla:

Poorly. Just poorly

He already was worried when he can’t find you, but seeing you in such a state?

Well, he got desperate

When he does get closer, seeing you awake and try to run off, it broke his heart 

He will catch to, due to your current state

When he does he’ll take you back to his castle and straight to the bathroom

Yup, he gives you a bath as well as new clothes to give you when you’re done. After, he takes you to the kitchen to get as many snacks and drinks as possible

He then takes you(as well as the mountain of foods and drinks) all the way to the Flower Bed and it goes as normal

Hollyberry 

Now it’s entirely dependent if a hunter, family member, or just her found you

If a family member(most likely Tiger Lily) found you, they’d be tempted to bring you back

They’d obviously be worried about you

However if you managed to convince them to help them go someone that ISNT known by the ancients, they’d help

If a hunter finds you, they’d pity you and take you to their place to recover…

Wether their a Yandere or not is extremely dependent-

But if Hollyberry HERSELF found you? Well she’d just scoop you up and take you back to her palace. Despite your constant squirming

She’ll actually try to find out who caused all this since she any of this herself

When she found out it was ————-, she’ll be shocked that one of her friends caused this

In turn she’d actually be a lot more protective when you have to meet all the ancients again

At least you two get to cuddle more often 

Dark Cacao

When he found you like that in the alley, sleeping on the cold, wet floor while not haven eaten anything well in a long while

Boy, he was livid

He immediately picked you up and tried to take you back to the citadel

But know how dangerous the terrain is and how fragile you are in you current state, you’ll be carried in his arms like a baby…INSIDE HIS CAPE

Remember: it was raining heavily when he found you, so hope you don’t move too much or you may crumble from hypothermia 

When he manages to get to get to the citadel, it’s similar to Pure Vanilla as he gives you a bath and a change of clothes

The difference being he immediately takes you to his chambers to rest

He leaves you there alone while going to investigate who did this to you and to find 

A way for you to become his queen

Golden Cheese

…I…highly doubt she’d actually find you sense it’s raining and your in an area probably unknown to her

But if she made the gurney while it’s raining

She’d be drenched and tired, considering she uses her wings a lot. Especially in battle

Well now you can run or fight Golden Cheese (which won’t be easy)

So here are some scenarios that can happen from here:

You run away, continuing the game of cat and mouse

You fight her and win. Leading to you running off as she lays defeated (she’ll be fine)

You fight her and loss. Well now you have to wait until the storm settles and she dries off. Then she can put you in a sarcastic 

White Lily

If you thought Dark Cacao or Pure Vanilla was bad, White Lily took it the worst

[iamthedamndonutdrawcat]

Berlin maradures au????

now listen! berlin hipster modern marauders band au. (i'm sorry this is brutally self-indulgent and may be incomprehensible to anyone outside berlin but i need to put it somewhere) this is a long post, so i put it under the cut. please excuse the word vomit :)

they all go to a grammar school that's a bit too shitty to call itself elite but does anyway. many children of bureaucrats, diplomats etc. that think they're ghetto f.e. James, Sirius and Remus. (Peter is the only normal one tyvm)

the marauders met as classmates in year 5. Remus and Sirius are forced into the school choir. all marauders learn acoustic tradtional instruments but their "band" is actually a soundcloud rap project. James and Peter build BAD beats and Sirius fixes them. they all do enjoy indie/rock and sometimes have jam sessions and do covers. artistic duo Remus & Sirius. intense homoerotic friendship James & Sirius. wolfstar endgame. Sirius curates a spotify account with only extremely niche melancholic rap to impress Remus; actually knows german trash rap by heart. serenades Remus with Ski Aggu "love" songs during Remus' depressive phases.

Sirius and James are third generation immigrants; Sirius turkish on his mother's side, James indian. Sirius family is not necessarily evil, just conservative diplomats with a big pride in tradition & well behaviour; far removed from their own cultural & religious roots in order to integrate into german political structures. however they are homophobic/unaccepting towards Sirius. Sirius grows up in a very german environment, gets misjudged by racist teachers. extremely smart yet often lazy. at school they're permitted to use ipads and chatgpt does his entire course work; he spends his time gaming during class. vape enthusiast although he gets horrible coughing attacks.

Remus's background is very international, somewhat french on Lyall's side and arab roots on mom's side, they met in england and moved to berlin with child Remus. Rip Remus' mom. Remus & Lyall live in a nice old apartment (Altbauwohnung) in berlins Pankow district (lots of families, settled down hipsters, sligh shift into suburban terrain), Lyall is either a lawyer or diplomat, 50/50 works or spends time with his girlfriend. crunchy distant father-son-relationship. but because no ones ever home, Remus constantly has friends (and Sirius) over. Remus has BPD, is in therapy and doing pretty well in his later adolesence. Remus spends lots of time outside, drinking in parks, chilling at friends', or smokes too much weed in his room. unapologetic chain smoker, even in front of Lyall. quiet and shy, makes him seem either rude or mysterious. bookworm & music nerd. nokia + ipod combo instead of smartphone because he doesn't want screen addiction or be too reachable. vape hater, point of argument with sirius.

accidental wolfstar public outing after Sirius drunkenly performs an Ikkimel song at a party and then throws himself at Remus (they don't really gaf anymore). For Halloween they dress up as a Cigarette and a Beer (Sternburger Export).

James watches german meme compilations every night and knows them by heart. Footie enthusiast with Sirius, drags the marauders to big games where they almost get trampled. extreme alman energy (aka white german energy, upstuck, snobbish and happily embarassing, taking part in typical german shenanigans) just like Sirius, except Sirius tries to hide it and James can deal with the jokes at his expense. James was a tv addict as a child. James & Sirius friendship began over a shared interest in anime.

Peter is the token german kid. Fridays for future gave him a bad conscience and all the marauders joined him in the demonstrations to get out of class. Extreme stoner, at least bi-weekly sessions with Remus. also i like the art kid peter hc so i'm stealing it. art kid peter who draws cartoons of his friends.

Lily & Severus live in the inner city Wedding district, rougher than the outer parts where Sirius & James live. Lily & Remus bff duo. (ik this is very boy centric, i have yet to dig deeper into my headcanons for the girls)

.

i have a lot of music associations, but they actually are nice songs so idc here they are...

songs to illustrate the vibes: Nachts wach by makko, Rasenschach by Filow, FUSSBALLMÄNNER by Ikkimel, Wenn du tanzt by Von Wegen Lisbeth

Remus coded songs: Marlboro Mann by Romano, Goldener Reiter by Joachim Witt, Ziemlich Verplant by Skinny Dazed (!!!), Alt sein by Pisse

Sirius coded songs: BIKINI GRELL by Ikkimel, Immer nur da by Fynn Kliemann, Klebstoff by Mine (extreme black brother angst vibes), Findelkind by Mine (i could make a whole seperate post on how wolfstar-coded Mine's & Fynn Kliemann's discographies are)

James coded songs: Haus am See by Peter Fox, Verschwende deine Zeit by Edwin Rosen (prongsfoot vibes imo)

Peter coded songs: Alles Gute by Faber, Bongzimmer by SXTN

[tzifron]

Reminds me of how the British blamed the Acadians for the Mi'kmaq resistance.

The crackdown on campuses offered a grim continuity: Police and other officials churned out all the same old excuses for quashing resistance. Most notably, their rhetoric relied on the predictable canard of the “outside agitator.” New York Mayor Eric Adams trotted it out as grounds for sending in an army of baton-wielding cops against the city’s students. And Deputy Police Commissioner Tarik Sheppard went even further on MSNBC Wednesday morning, brandishing an unremarkable chain lock — the sort of which I’ve seen on bikes everywhere — as proof that “professionals,” not students themselves, had carried out the takeover of the Columbia building. The bike-lock business quickly came in for rightly deserved mockery, but the “outside agitator” myth is no joking matter. In this current moment, the “outside agitators” conjured are both the perennial anarchist bogeymen or Islamist terror groups sending funds to keep student encampments flush with the cheapest tents available online. The “outside agitator” trope has a long, racist legacy, including use by the Ku Klux Klan. In the 1930s, the Klan issued flyers in Alabama claiming that “paid organizers for the communists are only trying” to get Black people “in trouble.” The allegation does double rhetorical harm by denying the agency and commitment of organizers themselves and suggesting that “outside” support from beyond a given locale or institution is somehow a bad thing. More recently, the canard has been hauled out in defense of movement repression in Atlanta, against Stop Cop City protesters who had made a national call for backup. And it was a common refrain for politicians nationwide during the 2020 uprising, as well as discourse around the earlier Black Lives Matter protests in Ferguson after police killed Mike Brown. Blaming outside agitators or interests always was a propaganda ploy and remains so now. The idea that Palestinian liberation struggle is a mere proxy for Iranian interests repeats the delegitimizing logic of the past. In fact, the Gaza solidarity encampments on campuses are student-organized and led, with Palestinian students at front and center, and a disproportionately large presence of Jewish students too. It is students, over 1,000 of them, who have faced arrest. It also happens that millions of people have called for an end to Israel’s genocidal war, and support for Palestinian liberation is not and must not be limited to the mythic and maligned terrain of campus activism.

[backwzzds]

ೃ⁀➷ touch me feel me, renji abarai (nsfw)

renji helps you relax after a long day at the nursing home.

for @roronoaswifey 🫶🏾🫶🏾

you huff out a deep breath as you finally open the door to your apartment. with a close of your eyes, you begin to feel yourself swaying back and forth in near collapse, but almost jump when you feel a familiar large set of hands support you.

“renjiii, don’t touch me, i have old people piss & shit over me,” you whined, shrugging your husband off of you. “i’m sweating, i stink, i feel disgusting.

renji frowned before embracing you again. “i missed you.”

you turn your head and peck his lips before leaving your dirty shoes by the front door and begin walking barefoot to your bathroom. “i know baby, but i need to shower first. that 16 hour double really fucked my back up.”

renji nearly winces at the sound of your back cracking for comfortability. but still, he ignored your previous protests and continues to place small kisses at the nape of your neck as you undressed out your scrubs. he’d lick you in dirt if you’d let him. some sweat didn’t bother him.

“i’ll run you a bath. then lemme give you a massage afterward, mama.” his voice is so convincing. all you wanted to do was collapse and fall asleep, but it would be a cold day in hell before you sat on any piece of your furniture in your contaminated work clothes. renji picks up your scrubs and places them in your work hamper set to wash in the morning.

finally, you give in with a bare nod as renji makes his way over to the tall white tub. running piping hot water just the way he knew you liked, you’re in the bath in two minutes. you sink to your bottom and tiredly rest your cheek against the base of your knee. renji notices how you’re so exhausted, you forgot to put your braids up so they wouldn’t get wet. grabbing pieces of your hair, he ties it up in a makeshift bun atop your head, to which you thank him with a mutter.

“bad day mama?” he asks as he began soaping your back with your washcloth. you let out a deep breath for the millionth time. you were just so happy to be home with him now. from the quietness of your response, he already knows your answer. “what happened baby?”

“so much shit. this shift was more traumatizing than the last. some old bitchy aide reported me to the nurse for a small mistake of leaving a trash bag in a room and i just kept making a bunch of mistakes today. i’m already an outcast because of how new i am to this shit, so this just makes it all much more embarrassing,” you admit it. “i don’t really wanna talk too much on it, ‘fore i get pissed off. that okay?”

renji looks at you as you turn to him with sad eyes. he gives you an adoring smile as he kisses your ear. “you just worked 16 hours. wouldn’t be expecting no different shit from you,” he teased with a small laugh from you. “just remember, everyone starts from somewhere. at the end of the day, you have a bigger goal to reach after school and most of that shit just stems from jealousy. a lot of older people don’t like seeing younger ones win or get bread. it’s fucking crazy.”

you giggle at his words, slowly feeling the stress leave your body. leaning against renji’s arm on the side of the tub, you run your pruny fingers across the terrain of his multiple tattoos. with soft eyes, you turn your head to face him once more.

“still wanna give me that massage?”

and that was how you ended up with your back to the mattress, getting between your legs ate out like no tomorrow. you always knew renji ate pussy. it was one of the reasons you got and stayed with him. but to say he was average at doing so—would be one of the biggest lies ever told.

“oh,” your voice is barely audible as your each up to stare down at the scene before you. a full head of red hair is busy obstructing your view as you can only see the side of renji’s face while he eats you out. “right there.”

you don’t have it in you to scream, you don’t have it in you to do too much. all you could do was cry and whine. your entire body is moisturized and glistening with cocnout oil with exception to your pretty pussy that’s being devoured by your husband.

“renji,” you let out, mind too confuzzled from the intense pleasure from your lower half to form any proper words. “t-that feels s-so—fuck daddy,” you bite your lip so hard, you swear you feel blood drawing from the pricked skin.

“feels good baby?” renji’s deep voice sends vibrations between your thighs as you nearly suffocate him from squeezing so tight around his head. he couldn’t blame you, you were a head squeezer as much as he was a head pusher.

“so good, ‘m gonna cum soon,” you cried, watching the euphoric scene unfold beneath you. renji licked long stripes up the base of his cunt before spreading your fat lips open to get a better view of your soaked clit already beginning to coat itself in white. to make matters better worse, renji slipped in a long and slender middle finger into your entrance, slowly pumping in and iut of you.

you begin to feel his digits curl in and out of you as he continues working around your creamy clit. it’s inevitable for your hands to immediately fly to his maroon red hair, wavy strands damp from helping you out in the bath.

your knees are folded so far back behind your head, the dangling jewelry of your belly piercing is digging deep into your skin as you threaten to collapse your legs along renji’s own back. “can’t—can’t hold it,” you’re breathing heavily, unsure on whether or not you can contain your orgasm.

renji hums at the sweet spot between your legs and continues at his slow pace. he was gonna take his time with you tonight. he knew how hard you worked, and only wanted nothing but the best treatment he could give you for the night. the pleasure wasn’t his, but instead yours.

within seconds, the devious redhead is kissing your clit, still working wonders on you. 11:59 by elijah blake is now playing lowly through your shared room as you grip the bedsheets beside you. renji uses his free hand to slowly slide up your body, making sure to touch every aspect of your curvaceous terrain.

without the use of his eyes, his hands immediately find home to one of your breasts, and he grabs the fat flesh in his hand, squeezing it contently. he removes his touch from you to spread your lips open once more, deciding to turn the heat up just a bit.

“renji!” you’re gasping when you feel his tongue poke your open hole. that was enough to send you creaming all over his face, milky white arousal coating his long tongue diving in and out of you. “please please, right there, i’m cumming, i’m cumm—“ your boyfriend ignores your exasperated cries as your legs tremble around him.

an hour later, he’s still going and by now you’re on your fourth orgasm. renji never joked around when he said he ate pussy for his pleasure. and not just any pussy—your pussy. the man could eat you out for hours on end then fall asleep like a baby without ever expecting anything back from you in return. he proved himself right every time he got between your plush thighs and ate you out like your pussy was his last meal on death row.

renji comes up from between your legs for the first time in a while. “c’mon ma, you can cum one more time for me. make a mess on my face baby, you deserve it.” a taunting smirk is rested upon his face as he admires the reaction he managed to have on you.

your entire body felt like it was going through shock. how could him eating your pussy soft and slow make you feel like a thousand volts of electricity where running through your bloodstream? you can’t even remember the trouble you went through earlier that day at work by the time you’re finally squirting along his face, completely done and overstimulated.

your mouth is held wide open in an o position as your breath gets caught in your throat. you can’t find the breath to speak as you continue releasing yourself all over renji, who, in turn is basking in your arousal like a child at a waterpark. tears flow from your dolly eyes as you finally feel all energy suck out of you like a vacuum.

by now, renji is doing his last rounds and licking you up completely clean. he always managed to get you so fucked out whether it was with his dick or with his fingers and tongue alone. by the time you’re pretty much wiped up clean, your man presses kisses along the brown terrain of your body. your braids are long gone out your bonnet by now, and you’re sure that your sheets were next in line to wash.

renji’s voice is sensual and low as he comes back up to you and looks down in your eyes with love and lust clouding his pupils. running his large hand down your breasts and giving it a comforting rub, he asks you, “you finally forgot about all that shit that got you worked up at your job earlier?”

the nod on your head isn’t enough to hide your smile as you throw your leg over him and finally knock out for the night.

[porblegames]

I've gotten some requests on how to make my trash terrain for 6mm sci-fi or modern miniatures. So I made a little tutorial. Enjoy!

The stuff you'll need: - Plasticard - Brass rod - Air drying clay foam - Bits of 6mm miniatures

Start by making a plasticard footprint, cut into an organic shape. Can't go wrong with kidney bean!

Gather some miniatures to use in our junk pile. We're not gonna cover the whole pile with them, just sprinkle them throughout. This is a good use for your misprints and broken minis, so don't throw them misprints away; use them for terrain.

The trash pile needs a "spine" of brass rod. Attach the brass rod with some glue and let it dry. If you don't give the plasticard a sturdy spine, the plasticard will bend and curl as the glue dries and you'll be super sad.

This is the kind of clay to use. Its super light and dries rubbery, not brittle like regular clay.

Attach some clay blobs onto the plasticard with glue and smooth them out. You'll need less clay than you think because the miniatures are gonna go into it and make it expand.

Sink your miniatures into the clay. I like to add cut up rectanlges of platicard to help cover the edge where it isn't smooth. Let the whole thing dry overnight.

Prime it black.

I usually paint it in sections. Base coat with a dark color. I'm going with purple, but you could brown or blue or gray too.

Free hand some geometric shapes with black. The shapes should be of very irregular. You can let the lines be messy at this step, we're just mapping out the freehand portion. Color in some of the shapes with black to imply negative space.

Base coat the shapes between the black lines in a couple different colors. I mix a little orange into the purple to make a warm brown. I base some of the shapes with a gray blue. A few others I pick out by mixing green or grey with the purple. This is the step where we want our lines to be (relatively) neat and tidy. Let the shapes expand a bit beyond their black line borders from the previous step.

Add another layer to the shapes to raise the intensity. Some shapes get more coverage than others, to make it more random.

More layers, mixing in more orange into the purple. I brighten the slate blue by adding a light pink.

Finish with some highlight layers. This is done by adding light pink to the blues/oranges/greens.

Add some dots of random colors in the remaining black space.

Go around the whole pile like so, until you cover the whole dang thing.

Then paint the miniatures in it. I paint the miniatures a bit brighter and with different colors than the freehand to make them stick out. And there you go. Trash time! Thanks for reading!

[aamputation]

SVSSS AU ... Benevolent System 0.3

related to [THIS] Shen Yuan art and -> [1st] [2nd] [4th]

As didi had promised, the little System had immediately chimed in with a mission the second Shen Yuan had appeared in the world. Granted, the mission was kind of important– seeing as he didn’t have a weapon aside from the Benevolent System Fan that held didi yet, and completing the quest would provide him with an honest-to-Airplane spiritual blade, which in his millennial nerd brain was more tempting than even the limited edition, limited run release of that Hatsune Miku statue he’d special ordered from Japan. 

According to the mission blurb that had appeared on the surface of his fan, the spiritual weapon Shen Yuan was supposed to be looking for was based on an old legend. Even as obsessive as Shen Yuan is about the world-building and lore of PIDW (including the monsters, of course) he can hardly remember much about the weapon as it was mentioned in the actual web novel. As far as he can remember, it was only vaguely mentioned in passing—something to do with one of Bingge’s wives, somewhere in the mid-triple-digits. It was a legendary semi-sentient blade created by an ancient Beast Cultivator, and was so powerful (but not more powerful than Xin Mo, of course) that if one were to be chosen to wield it, they would be able to communicate with and control even the wildest creatures—any number of beasts who roamed the mountains, oceans, and skies could become as docile as a lapdog! The possibilities were endless, one could amass a beast army to span the Human and Demon Realms, probably even the Abyss as well!

Naturally, upon hearing all of this from didi, Shen Yuan’s first thought is: sorry, wife number two-hundred something, but there is absolutely zero chance anyone else is getting their hands on that blade! 

As you well know, dear reader, the chaotic whims of fate all but doomed Shen Yuan the second he set foot into his favorite trash fire web novel’s setting. Now that he’s been living in the PIDW world for a short while, there’s one thing he knows for sure, and it’s that fate has a wicked sense of humor. Thus, our intrepid transmigrator followed the quest instructions to a tee, only to be held up when he realized he needed a guide to navigate the next branch of the quest. And so here he is, marching into the heart of the Steelwood Wilds on the edge of the Borderlands where monster-ridden trials await him with her at his side—Yin Xue, wife number 234—a rogue beast cultivator far too skilled for her own good, and who would not have been out of place in Ling You, Cang Qiong’s Beast Taming Peak. 

Shen Yuan curses the heavens above and subtly shakes his fan as a punishment for didi—the little shit should have warned him about this! He’s going to have to tread very carefully, lest he get suckered into some shitty romantic subplot with pretty characters that definitely are not his to conquer! Granted, she’s an infant right now in the story, barely older than eleven by the looks of things, so Shen Yuan will happily keep himself safely in the role of weird senior cultivator. Of course, since his luck is apparently abysmal, the plot has decided that she would be the one guiding him through the treacherous terrain. In truth, dear reader, despite his obvious seniority, Shen Yuan’s pride is suffering as he is not being guided so much as being dragged along, while the precocious tween makes snide comments about his incompetence.

“Are you sure you’re even qualified to hold a blade, Shen qianbei?” Yin Xue peers at him with one raised eyebrow as her beast companion—a still-growing bird as dark as ink that he recognizes as an Ironwing Falcon—lets loose a short, soft screech from its perch on her shoulder, as if sensing the real threat they are to face is not within the forest, but is in fact Shen Yuan’s complete lack of practical skills. 

Indignant, Shen Yuan puffs up his chest even though he knows deep down that his only real skillset he has in his arsenal right now is his ability to fake it til he makes it. He can only pretend to be competent long enough to get through the worst of what this trash fire universe will inevitably sicc on him. Obviously he can’t sword fight (at least not without some serious Matrix-style training with didi’s help) and his cultivation skills are basic at best, despite essentially having cheatcode-ed his way into the late core formation stage. All he truly has are a fancy fan that’s all but a deus ex machina, as well as his own frantic wits. 

“It’s just a blade,” he sniffs, forcefully maintaining an air of manufactured confidence. “It’s not that special.”

Yin Xue, of course, doesn’t seem convinced. She crosses her arms and stares at him with an intensity that makes Shen Yuan regret his entire existence.

“Maybe,” she replies, choosing her words carefully, “but it’s definitely not just a blade. It’s the blade. The one that makes people tame the beasts, bend the wilds to their whims, and—”

“Yeah, yeah, I get it, xiao Xue,” Shen Yuan interrupts her quickly. He genuinely doesn’t need another lecture from this toddler. “It’s important. I’m going to find it. I’m going to become the most incredible Beast Scholar in this entire world—oi, don’t look at me like that, I have a plan.” His voice wavers slightly on the word plan, but he can’t let her see that. He has to maintain his facade.

Yin Xue shoots him a suspicious glance before nodding curtly and signaling him to move forward. “I hope Shen qianbei’s plan involves not dying before we reach the last known location mentioned in the legend.”

Silently, Shen Yuan prays for the same.

The Wilds are far more dangerous than he could have imagined, even knowing all the ins-and-outs of the PIDW world as befits his giant fanboy status. Within minutes of stepping inside the dense, dark forest a giant, rampaging Ironhide Serpent-Tailed Bear comes crashing through the trees, its roar shaking the ground beneath him. Shen Yuan will admit that he freezes, his eyes widening with his ripple of fanboy excitement before his palms grow increasingly clammy with fear as reality sets in. The thought: that fucking thing could kill me! blares like a klaxon in his head on repeat. Of course, Yin Xue the thrice-damned child doesn’t even flinch, which causes Shen Yuan to call out in alarm.

“Xiao Xue!”

But as she simply swings out her arm, releasing both her Falcon and her potent qi-infused whip, he is reminded of the fact that even as a child, she’s far more experienced than him. Hell, the kid is actually well into the early qi condensation phase. Within moments, both girl and bird are deep into battle with the behemoth. 

“Shit shit shit– uhh, didi? A little help!?”

《 Of course, [Host]! This didi is ready and willing to assist! {UPLOADING TRAINING PROGRAM…} 》

《 {INITIALIZING.TUTORIAL:MARTIALFAN_ARTSv5.7.pkg} 》

《 … 100% ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴇᴛᴇ!  》

《 «𝐍𝐨𝐰 𝐥𝐨𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠…» 》

Shen Yuan hisses while his mind is inundated with boundless knowledge, stretching his mental limits. His qi rages in his meridians and he inhales sharply as the sensation of his bones and muscles ripping themselves apart overtakes him, followed by a swell of nausea as they seem to be rebuilding all at once. The process is agonizing in its intensity. He gags, the pain making his vision darken at the edges before as suddenly as it had come, he’s back to normal. Although, it’s not truly normal. He can feel the way that didi has burned the practical knowledge of the fan arts into his brain, forcing his body to undergo all the training required to use such skill in the span of seconds rather than decades. He wipes his mouth and swears violently as the Ironhide Serpent-Tailed Bear enters his range. He moves smoothly into a fighting stance.

“Holy–!”

Shen Yuan moves, but it feels almost like autopilot. He knows it’s him doing the fighting, it’s his body performing the actions, the strikes; and it’s his mind issuing the commands to execute it all, but it’s so surreal how natural it feels despite having never learned any of it before this very moment. As his fan deflects another strike from the venomous tail the beast is named for, Shen Yuan spins and sends a blast of qi-infused compressed air at it just as Yin Xue’s spiritual whip makes contact, the colliding forces ultimately ripping the monster apart in seconds.

“That’s what I’m talking about!” Yin Xue crows with the confidence of someone who’s used to killing monsters even before breakfast. “Why didn’t you say you were a Wu Shan master, Shen dashi?!” Yin Xue bounces excitedly in place, her youth even more obvious in her behavior, “Just think: if you had a proper blade, you would be even more unstoppable!”

“Right,” Shen Yuan mutters, as if the entire moment where he stood there like a deranged gaping fish wasn’t incredibly embarrassing enough. 

“What happened to your old sword, anyway, Shen dashi?”

“Uh, let’s just say I left it worlds away, hm?”

Yin Xue wrinkles her nose, but doesn’t press. “Okay, whatever you say, dashi…”

By the time the duo manage to reach the altar where the legendary blade is rumored to be confined, Shen Yuan has never been so glad for didi’s presence before in his life. The System really has been working overtime, offering warnings and alerts as they continue to navigate through the forest. With didi’s help, Shen Yuan unlocks a few additional cultivation skills almost like he’s in an RPG, levelling up his Talisman and Array skills to a mid rank level. It leaves him breathless, nauseous, and lightheaded each time, but the rush when flexing his newfound abilities is like no other. Yin Xue grows more and more attached to him as he reveals more of his hidden skills—he feels a little bad deceiving such a cute kid like he is, but there’s no denying the delight he gets from watching her eyes widen in excitement and awe every time he breaks through a challenge’s barrier like tissue paper.

The passing thought of collecting cute little disciples crosses his mind, but he dismisses the idea before it fully forms. A wanderer’s life is no place for a child to grow up in. 

Shen Yuan stares at the altar, a rustic stone monolith that serves as a tomb for the blade. Ancient vines and various flora of an ominous nature twine around the shrine itself, and there is a strange energy around the altar—almost like an invisible weight pressing down on him. He can see where the blade is sealed, just out of reach. Even behind its mystical barrier, Shen Yuan can feel the way it pulses with a wild power, the very untamed nature of it making his heart race. 

“Shen dashi,” Yin Xue murmurs, awestruck, “we found it!”

“Mn,” he hums in response, his eyes travelling over the surface of the monolith as he searches for a way to dispel the barrier array. He does a double take as his eyes catch on something engraved in the ancient stone. He steps closer, eyes narrowing as he murmurs aloud the inscription.

“Toothless jaws strike to the bone. Held in a grip and tame the wild—both beast and blade become beguiled.”

“What does that mean, Shen dashi? Is it… some kind of riddle?”

Shen Yuan furrows his brow, tapping his chin with his fan in thought. He feels the need to solve this on his own, and he has a feeling that didi wouldn’t help him even if he’d asked. This is part of his quest, after all; he has to complete his very first System Mission on his own or he’ll never get anywhere in this world. Didi is an amazing resource—basically a giant OP cheat code—but Shen Yuan wants to be able to rely on himself as much as he can, although he is incredibly grateful for his cute little system’s help.

“... toothless jaws… strike to the bone… in a grip…”

Shen Yuan scowls, furiously wracking his brain as he considers possible answers. It feels annoyingly Tolkien-esque, and although he’s adored the author’s books for years, he’s not exactly well adept at translating riddles. He stares at the shortsword where it remains, suspended in air inside the sealed barrier array, his eyes catching on something that seems to have been embossed onto the sword’s sheath. He steps closer, squinting as his mouth moves involuntarily, reading aloud the words.

“Yu Shou Shi… Ren ..?” 

The Beastmaster’s Blade? What kind of unimaginative–

Suddenly, it happens.

The ripple of qi is the only warning Shen Yuan gets before the barrier array explodes outward. He barely has a second to shield Yin Xue from the shock-wave as it hits them—it feels like he’s been cored out, the energy carving through him and the residual foreign qi echoing in his battered meridians.

The blade chose him.

He stumbles down to one knee, not processing Yin Xue’s panicked cries as he blinks, dumbfounded. He looks back over his shoulder where the blade remains suspended but no longer trapped behind the array. It moves in mid-air and he only has a second to react as it flies into his hand, as though it has been waiting for him all along. The moment it makes contact, the world shifts.

His thoughts become clearer. He can hear the thrum of the blade’s soul, as wild and untamed as any beast, yet purring like a domesticated cat in his grasp. Shen Yuan can sense the blade’s fraternity with its fellow beasts, he feels their roars, their needs. He’s always been fascinated with the beasts of the Great Master Airplane’s world, but his belief that they aren’t enemies to be feared is only reinforced—with this blade in hand, they are his subjects to be understood.

Yin Xue, hands trembling where she reaches for his kneeling form, takes a cautious step closer. “You… it picked you!”

Shen Yuan’s fingers tighten around the snowy-white hilt. In his hands it doesn’t feel like a simple weapon, but a promise. He has no idea what he’s getting into, allowing this half-feral semi-sentient weapon imprint on him, but for the first time since his arrival in the PIDW world, he feels genuine excitement as he considers his future here.

“I guess…” he says, glancing at his blade with new understanding. “Maybe being here is worth it after all.”

Yin Xue tilts her head at him, confused but grinning. There’s genuine warmth in her voice when she speaks. “They say the Beastmaster’s Blade is untameable, but… don’t let it tame you, Shen dashi.”

Shen Yuan nods, smiling down at her as he pats her head. She leans into the touch like a contented cat, her smile brightening. He feels the determination solidify in his heart. He will definitely use this blade, that it chose him is a blessing he’ll not soon forget. He will write the best bestiary this garbage fire of a world has ever seen—if only to prove that he’s worthy of the incredible weapon in his hands. 

But as the saying goes, dear reader, “even the smallest stones can create the greatest ripples,” and although Shen Yuan isn’t aware of his own influence yet, the consequences will drastically change this world he’s landed in—hopefully, for the better.

[1st] [2nd] < > [4th]

shout out to adornedwithlight for the reblog banner

[meraki24601]

Search and Rescue

“Stay low. Stay quiet. Check that your earpieces are working and head out. We will find them tonight. No one rests until we bring them home. Go.” Just waving for the band of rookies to leave their makeshift office was enough to throw Caretaker off balance. They slammed their hands down on their desk, sending a few papers flying, as they caught their fall. 

A scoff in the doorway drew Caretaker’s attention away from the way their legs trembled. “No one rests, huh? That include you?”

“No one. What are you doing here, Friend? I thought I sent you out with the—” 

“They’re eating. Recovering their strength to start the search in a new area. It’s nearly three hours after lunch. Did you even notice or bother to eat anything?”

Caretaker ignored the way their head spun as they picked up the papers that had fallen. “Time is running out. We have to find them before Whumper and their men do, if they haven’t already. Whumpee is counting on us- on me to find them.”

“Right.” Friend wiped their hand over their face. “Alright.”

Their muscles ached, but Caretaker didn’t let it hold them back. They’d assisted with the search for the past three days. Rising at 0400 and not returning until 2200 hours. All that could be spared to conduct the search was a mismatched group of rookies. The real soldiers were all fighting, attempting to keep Whumper from pushing further into the woods Whumpee had escaped into. 

For the most part, the efforts to hold them back had been successful. A few of the search parties had run into single or two-man groups who had slipped past the line, but they were easily taken care of, even by Caretaker’s inexperienced men. But… today was the last day. They didn’t have the resources to keep going as things were.

“Get your men. Their break is over.” Caretaker grumbled as they marched toward the door Friend was blocking. 

Friend’s arm snapped across the open doorway, forcing Caretaker to stumble to a halt. There was a water bottle in their hand. “Drink. Then I’ll let you go.”

Caretaker’s ears burned as their chest puffed up. “Don’t push me, Friend. I am still your superior officer. You will not prevent me from completing my mission, or I will have you arrested.”

“For making you drink water? Seems a little harsh. Even for you.” They sighed and slammed the cool plastic bottle against Caretaker’s chest. “If you pass out from dehydration, we will never find them. Drink. You need it.”

They meant only to take a small sip of the water, just enough to appease Friend. What happened could almost be counted as a near-drowning as they guzzled down every drop. Somehow, they hadn’t realized they needed to drink so badly.

“I’ll take care of the trash, and my team will be searching zone H5. They need your assistance in I11. Hagstead fell and had to be brought back to get her leg checked. The terrain is rough. Those kids will need your help to conduct a thorough search.”

Caretaker adjusted the earpiece that was threatening to fall as they ran. They would need to get the thing replaced when they got back. It shouldn’t be that hard to keep the thing in place, even when their whole body was jarred from jumping down the small ledge dividing search zones or when they tripped on a root hidden in the leaves.

“Caretaker? Officer, can you hear us?” The earpiece buzzed as Caretaker neared the area their temporary team was searching. “We have apprehended another of Whumper’s men. We have him contained. What are our orders?”

“What is your current location?” Panting for air, Caretaker picked up the pace toward the coordinates they’d been given. 

They were wrong. So very wrong. As Caretaker stumbled into the small, wrecked clearing, their eyes widened, and they nearly fell to their knees. The idiot rookies hadn’t captured one of Whumper’s men at all. 

It was Whumper who knelt at their feet with their hands cuffed behind their back. 

“Draw your guns, you fools. Did none of you pay any attention to the briefing? This isn’t some random bad guy.” Caretaker took a knee in front of their enemy and punched them in the face. “Nice to see you again, Whumper. What did you do with them?”

Whumper giggled, “Why, hello, Caretaker. I believe we’re searching for the same thing, am I right? It’s like they always say… if you want something done right, do it yourself.”

Caretaker stumbled to their feet. “Friend. Are you in the field? I need you and your team at my location immediately.” 

The response was hard to make out, but still recognizable as an acknowledgement and compliance. Even though help was on the way, Caretaker couldn’t leave Whumper in the hands of these bumbling morons. “You four, stay and help guard the prisoner. Everyone else looks for Whumpee. Focus on the areas around where you found this piece of gutter trash.” 

It was all Caretaker could do to keep from pacing. They could come up with a few options for what Whumper’s presence on the field this far out could mean. Especially since they seemed to be alone. 

First, they had been struggling to find Whumpee just as much as Caretaker had. They’d lost patience and decided to join the search, charging their second in command to keep up with the fight they left behind. They had still been searching when Caretaker’s men had found them, and Whumpee was still out there, maybe not even close.

Second, Whumper had found Whumpee and sent them back with their men, staying behind to throw Caretaker off the scent. Whumpee would be nearly back at the enemy base by now if that were the case. Lost forever.

Third, Whumper had gone out alone to search for Whumpee, found them, and when they saw Caretaker’s men were coming, killed them rather than letting Caretaker have them.

“Can you hear me? Caretaker!” The gun was ripped out of Caretaker’s hand before they could fire it. If Whumper had killed Whumpee, there would be no trial. Even though Friend had arrived and was gripping their shoulder tightly, talking in a rough whisper in their ear to save face in front of the soldiers, Caretaker would kill Whumper for what they had done. “Go. Your team needs your help. I’ll bring Whumper back to the base.”

Caretaker marched into the forest in the direction their men had gone. They weren’t far away, and their trail was easy to follow. Several of them were down in a small ravine, looking around aimlessly. 

Jumping down into the ravine made Caretaker stumble, but the rookies didn’t seem to notice, straightening as Caretaker demonstrated how to actually search for a missing person. “What, did your mommies not teach you how to look for things? Let’s go! Check at the base of trees and under the taller brush. There could be caves or any sort of spot where…”

The branch they were lifting scratched their arm, but the pain didn’t even register. Even though it was covered in dirt and other stuff Caretaker didn’t care to identify, they knew what they were looking at, nearly buried in the shadows. When the foot moved and pulled deeper into the dark hiding spot, it only confirmed things.

“You two. The ones who were actually trying to do things the right way. Come over here. The one at the top, you, call it in. The rest of you, back the hell up and out of my sight. We don’t want to overwhelm them.” Even though the rookies were grossly undertrained, they followed the orders well, immediately moving to do what they were told.

The man and woman that had been called closer took up position on either side of the space without prompting. If Whumpee tried to run, they wouldn’t get far.

“Hey. You’re safe now. Whumpee? It’s me. Caretaker.” They called, kneeling on the ground and lifting the branch. Whumpee hadn’t moved since that small shifting of their foot, and Caretaker was sure it wasn’t a sign they’d recognized their voice.

Caretaker waited, hoping Whumpee would come out, and sighed when nothing happened. “Okay. I’m going to help you out of there. It’s going to be alright, do you understand? We found you before they could. I’m going to shine a light to see if you’re hurt, then we’re going to bring you back with us.”

“Don’t. No.”

Whumpee was conscious! That was good. Even though their voice was ragged and hoarse, they could still talk and knew enough of what was happening to try to push back.

“You’re safe. It’s me, Caretaker.” The woman, Keefler, handed Caretaker a flashlight, and they accepted it, shining the light on Whumpee’s legs to light up the space without blinding the victim. 

Both of the rookies gasped. Caretaker cursed. Whumpee curled in on themselves only to cry out as the movement jostled them. 

“Hey, hey. Stay still. You’re alright. Look at me, Whumpee. I’m going to get you out of here. I know for a fact that Whumper will never touch you again. This is probably going to hurt, but we’ll be as gentle as we can. You are safe, Whumpee. I found you.”

[the-californicationist]

a safe house

(Price/Reader) SFW - But MDNI on my blog please!

“Ghost! How copy? Riley, come in!” Price shouted into his headset. 

You were sending cover fire over the fallen tree that you and your captain were hiding behind. Unfortunately, you’d been separated from the rest of your team. Soap, Ghost, and Gaz were on the other side of the large, icy ravine, and they had done a good job drawing the enemy away from the target zone. Price kept trying to connect, but there was too much snow cover. A nasty blizzard was rolling in, and you needed to find better shelter, quickly. 

“Captain! Enemy has been eliminated. We need to find shelter,” you tried to pull him up off of the ground. 

He looked up at you, frustrated,

“Aye, Corporal, but they’ll be back. We need to find a way to warn the boys.” 

“Look,” you showed him the map on your datapad, “Laswell said there’s an old town…I think she called it Khabnoye? It’s been abandoned for years, about two klicks away. There might be some old technology, radios, whatever. We can reach them on some long-range.”

“Alright, let’s move.”

It was a short distance, but the terrain was brutal due to the snow. You made it there by nightfall, and carefully approached the outskirts of the town, following Price’s lead to scope out possible enemy combatants. There was no one in sight. It truly was a ghost town, and you were justifiably creeped the hell out. 

A small house was mostly intact near the very edge of the town, plenty of empty space around its edges, and only one broken window. You began to sweep the rooms, of which there were only three, noting that its prior occupants had left in quite a hurry sometime in the late 80s. You were fighting a nameless, secret war inside of the Chernobyl Exclusion Zone, so most of the towns you came across were similarly abandoned. 

You stood in the kitchen with Price, catching your breath and unpacking your bag. He was starting up the small, convective space heater checking for high levels of radiation in the room, making sure it was sustainable for the night. 

“Alright, let’s go dark. No lights, no comms until we get a better idea about what happened,” he said in a low voice. 

“Yes, sir. I did get a notification from Soap, but the message is unreadable,” you showed him the datapad before you powered it down. 

He sighed,

“At least we know he’s alive and stable enough to send comms. We’ll work on connecting when this storm blows through.”

“Yes, sir.” 

“Drop the formality, Sparrow. Not spending the whole night listening to your sirs.”

He was upset. The operation was ruined, and he had no idea where his team was or if they were even alive anymore. You said nothing, letting him unpack two MREs and prep the bags for you. You checked the other rooms. There was a tiny, filthy bathroom without running water, and a bedroom with a dingy full mattress without sheets. You set to work arming the windows with night vision motion cameras - much good may it do you with all this snow - and rigged the front door. 

“No use,” Price muttered, digging into his chili and beans MRE, starving.

“Why? You think we’re safe here?”

“No tracks in or out. No trash younger than me, and no pings for ten miles,” he showed you his passive EMP monitor, “Our tracks are covered by now with the storm. They’ll assume we rendezvoused back at the base. It was closer and easier to access.”

“Closer? Why’d you come here then?”

“Base might be compromised,” he shrugged, “Couldn’t reach McTavish, so we can’t assume anything at this point. Might as well get comfortable and wait til morning. This’ll clear once the sun comes out, and we’ll send an AM ping.”

You sighed a breath of pure relief, 

“I know I’ve only been with you guys for a few months, but honestly, I don’t know what’s more impressive, your technology or your level-headedness under insane fire. Feeling very much like the amateur I am, Captain.”

“You handled yourself well out there, little bird. I’m impressed,” his praise rushed through you like adrenaline, and you basked in it. 

“Thanks, Cap,” you smiled, drinking the broth of your soup and packing up your MRE trash into its bag. 

“You smoke cigars, love?”

It was midnight before you even considered going to bed. You and Price had stayed up in the kitchen, smoking and chatting in the dark, only illuminated by the glow of your ashes. The snow fluttered down outside, layering itself on the ground like a pile of white sheets. There’d be at least two feet of it at the door tomorrow morning. 

“...and I got this one in Amsterdam, chasing some smugglers out of the wharf. Motherfucker stabbed me right through the arm. Missed the bones, thank Christ. But, that’s not the bad one.”

You were telling each other stories about your scars, and you were in all states of dress. It was warm with the space heater, and you were comfortable around each other. Aside from admiring the mountainous swell of his shoulders and chest, you tried not to think much of it. He was hot, but he wasn’t interested. You just had a small crush. It would pass. 

Okay, maybe a big crush. But, you had some self-control. 

Some. 

“Oh,” he leaned across the table to get closer and look at your arm, “What was the bad one?”

You blushed, not that he could see it, 

“It’s in a certain spot. Not sure you want to - ”

“Don’t make me beg, little bird,” he smirked, rolling his eyes at your modesty. 

He was right, of course. You weren’t sure why you were shy. 

Liar. You were shy because you had an enormous, filthy crush on your commanding officer. 

You tucked your elbow beneath your shirt and pulled it up over your chest, showing him your sternum,

“This one. It’s a - ”

“Flare burn,” he whispered, his demeanor changing from jovial to serious very quickly. 

“Yeah, how’d you know?”

He was silent for a long time. You watched as Price too a big mouthful of cigar smoke before letting it billow around him, looking like a big, brooding dragon in the quiet room. 

“How’d you get it?” He asked, avoiding your question. 

“Enemy trap. They rigged the door to blow a flare. My vest, all my plate, none of it mattered. The flare burned so hot that it cut right through the gear like butter. If it wasn’t for our medic knowing that he needed to knock it out, I would’ve died. Three weeks in the med bay. It was bad.”

Price reached out slowly, almost as if not to scare you, and touched the circular wound. It wasn’t sexual, but that didn’t stop you from immediately feeling aroused by having his hands on you. You shuddered involuntarily, and he jerked his hand back. The silence in the room was suffocating.

“Sorry, little bird,” he whispered his apology, “Did I hurt you?”

“No,” you chuckled, taking a drag of his cigar for yourself, trying to calm down, “Uh, no.”

“What?” He prodded, not realizing what truth he was asking you for.

“It’s nothing, sir,” you stood up from the table, trying to escape, and forgetting you were in a 200 square foot house. 

He stood with you, reaching out to touch your shoulder. You sighed into his contact against your will, feeling the stress of the day melt away as he did. 

“It just…” You tried to throw him a hint, “Feels good, you know. To be touched. Been a long time… sorry, sir.” 

“Told you to swallow those sirs, little bird,” he whispered in a low rumble, putting his other hand on your other shoulder, grabbing you gently. 

There was very little space between your bodies now that you were away from the table, standing in the no-man’s-land between the bed and the kitchenette. It smelled like sweat and tobacco and 1987 in there, and you were breathing hard, nervous and desperate for him to do something to you that he couldn’t take back. 

“Sorry,” you said under your breath, not knowing what else to tell him.

Price lifted your chin up to meet his eyes, grabbing your jaw firmly, but gently. In the blackness of the night, the moon reflected only a little of his icy blue eyes, and the glow from his cigar made his face appear sharp and saurian. You didn’t expect for his touch to be so light. Just hours ago, he’d snapped a man’s neck with these same hands, and now he was passing the pad of his thumb over your bottom lip like you were the petal of an orchid, careful not to bruise you. 

“I’m trying,” his breath was ragged as he confessed, “I promise, I’m trying to let it go, little bird.”

“Let what go?” You put your hands on his hips, trying to steady yourself, feeling dizzy with lust and fear. 

“My desire,” he put his forehead against yours, closing his eyes, struggling, “Turn me away. Please, little bird. End my fucking torment. I’ll never mention it again. I swear it.”

You kissed him, pressing your lips into his chastely but firmly, enjoying the heat and the smoothness of his skin, the smell and the feel of his beard, coated in tobacco smoke and his own sweat. The comforting spice of the chili lingering on his mouth. He breathed in like you’d pressed a hot iron brand into him, blissful pain radiating through his body, pulling you in close to his chest. He deepened the kiss, slanting his mouth against yours, moving your skull with his powerful jaws, leading you, commanding and strong in his desire. 

“Love, don’t… don’t do this. Not unless you mean it. I’m bloody beggin’ you.”

You smiled, resting your nose alongside his, kissing him again slowly and carefully before answering him, 

“I mean it, John. I mean it.”

Reblogs and comments deeply appreciated! <3 <3

AO3 Link

[msriri030]

Under His Gaze

a bit of Stu x reader and Alan x reader

maybe a can be a part two of this Fanfic

"Stu, I told you—my dad already made plans to go hunting on my last day," you said, scanning the convenience store shelves stacked with chips and soda. Stu trailed behind you, arms crossed, lips pressed into a dramatic pout.

“Come on, (Y/N)! You can’t be serious!” Stu whined, trailing behind you like a sulky puppy. “I’m your best friend! At least let me come with you!”

You sighed, grabbing a bottle of soda and tossing it into your basket. “Stu, you know my dad doesn’t exactly like you—especially after my mom found your porno magazine in his toolbox.”

Stu groaned, throwing his head back dramatically. “For the love of—That was years ago! How long is he gonna hold that against me?!”

“I don’t know,” you said, raising an eyebrow as you reached for a container of trail mix. “He had to sleep on the couch for, like, three weeks. You added years to his marriage counseling bill. I’d say that’s hard to bounce back from.”

Stu let out a long, theatrical sigh, rubbing the back of his neck. He didn’t have a comeback for that one. He watched you quietly as you studied the label on the container, your face focused but calm.

He didn’t want you to leave. Didn’t want to say goodbye. But he also didn’t have the heart to make you feel guilty for going.

“What? …You’re really gonna miss me, huh?” you said, glancing over with a smirk.

Stu grinned, but there was something softer in his eyes. “You have no idea.”

His heart was breaking.

—--------------------------------------------------------------

“Thank you so much, (Y/N). I don’t mind raccoons much, but I can’t clean up after these two little demons every morning,” your elderly neighbor, Mrs. Vita, said with a grateful smile, her eyes crinkling behind her glasses.

You held up the cage trap with a wry grin, the two raccoons inside staring back at you with unrepentant mischief in their eyes. “No problem, Mrs. Vita. I’ll take these trash pandas back into the forest where they belong.”

“By yourself?” Her brows knit together in concern. “Don’t you have someone to go with you? It can be dangerous out there.”

You chuckled softly, shaking your head. “Don’t worry—I don’t go too deep. Just far enough that these little guys hopefully won’t make their way back to your yard again.”

You lifted the cage a little, one raccoon pawing at the metal as if in protest.

Mrs. Vita gave you a fond but worried look. “You’re braver than me. Be careful, alright?”

You offered her a reassuring smile. “Always.”

After offering Mrs. Vita a reassuring smile, you set off into the forest, your rifle slung securely across your back and the cage containing the two mischievous raccoons gripped firmly in hand. The cool night air whispered through the trees, carrying the earthy scent of moss and damp leaves. As you followed the familiar winding path, your thoughts drifted to your recent encounter with the enigmatic stranger.

Alan Orion—the hatchet-wielding man with wild, wolf-like hair. The memory brought a chuckle to your lips. For a woodsman, he certainly possessed an unexpected charm.​

But why was he in the woods? You hadn't seen him around town before. The question lingered, unanswered, as you navigated the uneven terrain.

Lost in thought, you didn't notice the low-hanging branch until it was too late. With a startled grunt, you walked face-first into the rough bark of a sturdy oak. Stumbling back, you shook your head, heat rising to your cheeks in embarrassment. If your mother were here, she'd tease you mercilessly, claiming you'd fallen head over heels—quite literally.

Sighing, you glanced around, noting the dense foliage and the soft rustle of nocturnal creatures. Deciding you'd ventured far enough from town, you set the cage down gently. Stretching to ease the stiffness in your muscles, your gaze was drawn upward. The canopy parted just enough to reveal a tapestry of stars, twinkling brilliantly against the inky sky.

"Wow," you murmured, awe-struck. "It's so beautiful."

"Not as much as you, Doe-Eyes."

The unexpected voice sent a jolt through your system. Spinning around, your eyes locked onto Alan, standing a few paces away, his heterochromatic gaze fixed intently on you. His sudden appearance was both unsettling and intriguing.

"Alan?" you managed, your voice a mix of surprise and curiosity. "What are you doing here?"

He offered a lopsided grin, the moonlight casting shadows across the scars that marked his face. "I could ask you the same thing? Dangerous place for someone like you to be alone."

Your heart pounded in your chest, a cocktail of adrenaline and something else you couldn't quite name. Despite the unease prickling at the edges of your consciousness, you found yourself drawn to the man before you.

"I was just releasing these two," you explained, gesturing toward the raccoons, who were now crouched beside the cage, twitching their noses at  the two of you. "They've been causing trouble for my neighbor. Stealing trash like it’s a buffet."

Alan’s eyes flicked from the animals to you, unreadable for a second before softening. “Always knew you had a kind heart,” he said, voice low and steady.

Something in his tone struck you—like the edge of a blade wrapped in velvet. You looked away, but not before his words settled deep, like a spark curling in your chest.

“But you should be careful,” he added, his voice dipping lower, almost like a warning or... a promise. “Not everything in these woods is as harmless as those little thieves.”

A shiver ghosted down your spine. The cool night air kissed your skin, but it wasn’t the cold that made you tremble—it was him. His presence. His voice. The way he said “not everything.”

“I know,” you said quickly, your voice a little too thin. “That’s why I don’t go to the deep end of the woods. Never have.”

You turned, hoping to hide the pink that bloomed in your cheeks, but Alan was already stepping closer. Close enough that you could smell the faint trace of cedar, musk, and something wild that clung to him like second skin.

“You’re clever, doe-eye,” he said, leaning just enough that his breath tickled the shell of your ear. “But danger doesn’t always live where you expect it. Sometimes, it follows you home.”

You swallowed hard. “I-I’ll keep it in mind.”

The words barely left your lips before his nearness wrapped around you like a cloak—warm, protective, and unsettling all at once. The forest, once a place of childhood hikes and calming solitude, now felt alive with hidden things. With eyes in the shadows. With secrets.

“Anyway…” you cleared your throat and bent toward the cage. “I should let them go.”

You fiddled with the latch, the cold metal grounding your nerves. With a gentle tug, the door swung open, and the raccoons bolted into the brush. You watched them disappear, not realizing Alan hadn’t moved—hadn’t stopped watching you.

He took a single step closer, boots silent on the mossy floor. Then another. And then you felt him—just behind you—his body heat brushing your back like a whisper.

“You smell pretty good, doe-eye,” he murmured, voice half-laugh, half-growl.

Your breath hitched. “Y-you think so?”

You turned your head slightly to meet his eyes—only to find his face barely inches from yours. His gaze was liquid heat, slow and unblinking, drinking you in. His lips curved in a smile, but his eyes... his eyes were hungry.

“Yeah,” he said, so close you could feel the vibration of his voice. “Good enough to eat.”

Before you could react, he lunged—not with violence, but playful hunger. You squeaked, a startled laugh bursting from your lips as he tackled you gently into the soft underbrush.

“Alan!” you gasped, trying to squirm out from under him. “You’re heavy!”

He chuckled, the sound rumbling through your chest as he braced himself above you, arms on either side of your head. The weight of him pressed down—not enough to hurt, but enough to remind you that he was there, solid, real, unshakable.

“Strong enough to catch you, though,” he said, smirking.

Your heart pounded—not just from the fall, but from the way he was looking at you now.

Like you were prey he didn’t quite want to consume... yet.

Alan hovered above you, his body heat sinking into your skin, grounding you in place. His thumb traced the line of your jaw with a slowness that made your breath hitch—tender, almost reverent.

“You’ve got no idea what you do to me, do you?” he whispered.

Your lips parted, but no words came. You were too focused on the storm behind his mismatched eyes like the forest had left its imprint inside him.

What is he talking about? You stared, trying to read him, your pulse fluttering like trapped wings.

Alan was breathing heavier now, shallow and fast, as though resisting something buried deep—something feral. Your hand lifted almost without thinking, fingers brushing over his chest. Beneath your touch, his muscles tensed. He hiccuped, startled by your softness, and then leaned in like your palm was gravity itself.

But something twisted in your gut. Too close. Too fast.

Your hands flattened gently against him and pushed. Not hard—just enough to create space. Enough to breathe. Your gaze dropped away from his.

“Alan…” you whispered, heat rushing to your cheeks. “Could you maybe—uh… get off me?”

He stilled.

Then, blinking in surprise, Alan tilted his head. “Yes, Doe-eyes?”

You met his gaze again, sheepish and red-faced. “No offense, but… my gun is stabbing me in the back.”

There was a pause.

Then—“Oh! Oh damn, I’m sorry!” Alan scrambled off you, moving fast but careful not to jostle you. “I didn’t mean to crush you like that!”

He knelt beside you as you sat up, wincing slightly. You reached behind and tugged your hunting rifle free from where it had been pinned beneath your spine. The safety was still on—thank the stars—but the metal had left a sore, stinging spot.

Alan watched you with sheepish concern, his hand halfway raised as if unsure whether to help or give you space.

You looked at him, trying to stay annoyed, but it was hard when he was giving you that boyish, apologetic smile. You murmured, “It’s okay. Just… maybe let me breathe next time.”

He chuckled, scratching the back of his neck. “Got it. Keep all rib-cracking hugs to a minimum.”

You rolled your eyes, but the smile tugging at your lips betrayed you.

The forest had quieted again. The raccoons were long gone. And for a moment, all that existed was the quiet thrum of your heart and the man beside you—half wild, half sweet, and impossible to ignore.

[the-possum-writes]

could you do a detailed smut/fluff with adult!Finn after reader has been away on an adventure?

Long time no see 🔞

❥Character: Finn Mertens

❥Tags: NS/FW, gender neutral reader, private parts aren't specified, Face sitting, Oral, Established Relationship, Fluff, Vanilla, No beta,

❥Synopsis: Coming back to Finn after spending months climbing through snow covered mountains. As much as you love traveling, you love him even more.

❥Wordcount: 2400

❥Taglist: @watchingfromthefloorboards @foxpearlwilder

With the treefrort being no taller than a sapling it made it harder to find Finn's mobile home with how much he loves to move around without telling you, but the again, you can't say no to a challenge. 

The air is humid, and the sky grows gloomier as clouds block off the day's final rays of sunlight. The trinkets on your backpack clink together as you hike uphill toward the parked metallic trailer, where the candy horses are already preparing for sleep; any doubts about no one being home are thrown out the window when orange light shines behind the solitary door. A single knock is made while speaking clearly. "Sir Mertens, we've come to discuss your expired warranty," you say as solemnly as you can.

Footsteps approach you as a muffled voice talks from inside the trailer. "A warranty? But I paid choose goose years ago." When the door finally opened, Finn was shocked to see you instead of some unscrupulous lawyer. Even in this temperature, he is dressed in just a pair of faded gray tank top and a pair of denim shorts. He is just as you remember, tall, chubby, but neither too skinny nor excessively jacked up, and his blond beard matches the blond hairs on his head that aren't covered by his customary bear hat. However, he appears to be immune to the autumn season since when he greeted you with a bear hug, you felt firsthand how naturally warm he truly is, with his body heat surrounding you even through the layer of clothes you dressed yourself for travels.

After a minute of hugging you, he laughs in your ear and releases you. "I should've known better; lawyers wouldn't bother trekking up this steep hill just to charge me with a stupid warrant."

"You obviously never met a lawyer then, they're more relentless than a honey badger with a grudge." you point out. This gained another laugh from Finn, "Come inside! you look like you've fought one yourself."

And he wasn't lying, expeditions didn't really leave you looking fresh like a cabbage.

As you step inside his cozy trailer you soon realize why Finn was dressed in light clothes, it's just as warm as he is with the orange lights coming from a heater in the corner of the main area that looks like a living room, a few more looks around the place hold the trademarks of a single occupant, empty pizza boxes stacked together in the trash bin, clean but unfolded laundry basket out in the open and countless trinkets, weapons and treasures mounted on every inch of the walls. You drop your backpack to the carpeted floor as you take in the details of the treasures, some look familiar to you while others are completely brand new. You make a mental note to ask about them later for now you only have one thing in mind as you remove your coat.

"I'mma hog the shower bit." you affirm, not really asking for permission but you do toss in a suggestion for good measure. "You could use one too, I may look the part but you smell more like a badger than me." 

Finn scoffs at your jab until he caught a whiff of himself and agreed non verbally. The last thing you saw before closing the door to the bathroom was Finn grabbing two towels from the cupboard but not a pair of new clothes considering the basket was right there, it sent a shiver down your spine and settled in your stomach, but you choose to ignore it for now as you get your priorities straight.

The sigh you release when the warm water crashed on your body could easily be confused for something pornographic, but considering the rough terrain you've traveled through and the rough weather outside it's no brainier you'd feel so satisfied with something as mundane as a hot shower. Your hands are combing through the knots in your hair when you heard Finn follow you into the shower, you step aside to allow him some room under the shower head as he shakes his head like a dog. "Can you pass me the shampoo? it's on the sink." he asks, eyes closed as he lavishes in the hot water just like you did earlier. You poke your head out of the shower curtain to retrieve the bottle on the ledge of the sink, almost laughing your ass off when you read it's one of those '13 in one for men' brand. "For real? why not have a shampoo and conditioner like Jake did?" you snort.

"Hey, I'm a busy guy. Why waste my time with a ton of bottles if one has it covered?" is his defense, but you comply nevertheless as you squeeze the shampoo over his open palm as he washes his rowdy blond locks with it, you can't help but feel a twinge of jealously, Finn could use car shampoo and his hair would still look majestic and soft. Good genes i suppose. Your eyes went to the single hand washing his hair with his other shoulder leading to a scarred stump you've seen replaced with a multitude of weapons and robotic prosthetics but now it's just as nude as the rest of him. He helps you out with your own hair, scrubbing your back and even cleaning behind your ears like a cat grooming it's partner, and yet you allow him, let him satiate his touch starved need with these caresses on your body that don't necessarily lead to anything promiscuous under the shower head but knowing the two of you it's just a matter of time. He's the first to walk out of the bathroom, handing you your towel as he dries out his long hair in his bedroom. While you follow behind his steps it's like walking in on an undisturbed nymph bathing in a pond during golden hour, with the orange light casting striking shadows and highlights over every noteworthy angle on his body, from his sturdy thighs to his firm shoulders and lastly his prominent ass, it's like you're hypnotized when you slowly walk up to him to wrap your arms around his midriff and press your exposed body to his. "So, what did you bring me from your trip?" Finn asks softly while lowering his hand to meet with yours, caressing your scarred knuckles with his large thumb.

"Since when am i obligated to bring you stuff from my trips? there's not exactly any souvenir shops on top of freezing mountains." you jest, resting the side of your head against his back as your other hand trails up and down his hairy navel, feeling his muscles tense down south.

"You always bring me something," he snorts, "Either way, I'm glad you came back safely."

Finn tosses the wet towel elsewhere as he turns around to face you, expediently but suddenly smashing his lips against yours with a fervor you've only witnessed when he's fighting monster taller than himself, he doesn't leave any spot of your mouth untouched with drooling dripping from the corner of your mouth as you caress his tongue with your own in a cacophony of grunts and gasps that escape past your hot breaths. Finn drops himself back into the edge of his bed and brings you along with him with the only thing keeping you above him being your knee in between his parted legs, if his body is naturally warm like a radiator then the growing length nestled in his loins is overbearingly hot, you raise your knee to tease more of him in an attempt to seek more of the noises that were getting caught in his throat. Seeking more from him, you quit the teasing and get down to your knees, kissing the interior of his firm thighs as you make way to the bulbous pink tip eagerly twitching in your direction. You place one smooch on Finn's tip, before placing another, and another until you take his entire gland past your chapped lips, humidifying them with the droplets of precum slipping through his head as you take more of him with a needy groan.

Finn fidgets a bit in his spot, you raising your view to see him lovingly staring back at you through his gorgeous blonde eyelashes, compelling you to take more of him as you keep eye contact so the memory of you stuffing your mouth with his cock becomes engraved in every cell in his brain. Finn's mouth opens up ever so slightly to expel sighs, grunts and whines every time you bob your head up and down, focusing on the way your tongue swirls around his tip like a lollipop. He's so painfully close it has you aching for him more than all those nights you spent alone on snowy terrain, so you removed yourself from his cock with a final slurp and an audible pop, leaving behind a mess of saliva dripping down your tongue. "...ah, ah, not yet." you insist, ignoring your pained knees as you stand up in front of Finn, softly pushing him on his back as you climb him like a tree.

Almost as if he read your mind, Finn grabbed hold of you with a single hand. "Come here," he pulls your hips to his face, stuffing his mouth with everything you could offer to him. You gasp in bewilderment as Finn takes in as much as he can in his own mouth, sucking, nibbling and letting his tongue run wild all over you as your body instinctively jerks back and forth while tugging on his blonde hair. The action has Finn growling from under you, with his own hips jutting forward even though there's nothing to rut against, Finn has learned to become a patient man when it comes to his urges but it's like the build up from months without any lewd contact finally went to his head and has him tapping into a lustful state. And boy, you're all in for it. You remove yourself from Finn's face, ushering the most basic english through needy pants. "Need you inside, now."

This has Finn tossing you to your side, keeping you in place as he dips his head in between the crook of your neck and shoulder to lick and bite to his pleasure. He guides his fingertips to the opening of your mouth, letting him wet his digits with the excessive saliva pooled in your tongue as you got his fingers nice and wet. It's in your best interest after all. "That's it babe, i need 'em nice and slick, I want you to take me... all of me..." he whispers in your shoulder. After he's satisfied with the copious amount of drool he guides them to your already wet opening (thanks to his own saliva from earlier) and slips in one finger after another, poking and prodding inside you as he stretches you out a bit. His touch has every nerve in your your legs twitching, growing accustomed to the isolation and lack of his touch after all this time has you whimpering like it's your first time with him, and Finn dwells in this. "Missed me after all huh? or did you miss my cock?" Finn replaces his fingers for his hot rob, rubbing the tip over your entrance in a teasing manner just like when you rubbed your knee against him.

"Everything. I missed everything about you Finn-" you confess absolutely breathless, taking his mouth for another kiss as his slips himself inside you, with both of your grunting in unison.

"I missed you to," is the last time you hear him speak in a soft tone. "...Won't keep you waiting." Finn's voice struggles to sound coherent as he secures his arm around your midriff as he drills into you from behind, already starting with a rough pace as he keep true to his word like the knight he is. Your cries of ecstasy combine with his own mix of grunts and growls, even biting into your shoulder to add more marks to the growing collection on your skin. Finn didn't stop his onslaught on your for a second, not when he switched your positions and laid you on your back as he raised your legs over his shoulder to fuck deeper into your wanton body, taking in all of his rough biting that you returned with long scratches on his already scarred back, the angle not only allow for deeper thrusts but it also gave you a beautiful view of his gorgeous body. Just like the treasure mounted on his wall, some of his scars were familiar while there were new ones to the collection, one of them being the unfinished tattoo decorated over his beefy hairy chest, you run your hands over his torso, feeling the muscle underneath flex with every movement Finn provides both for your pleasure and his love for you. It's these touches of yours that has Finn slow down from his heated session against your lower regions to dwell a bit in the feelings that have you two in this situation in the first place, his thrusts become slow and shallow, taking the time to release his hold on your thigh to grab your hand and kiss your knuckles which although were scarred and calloused they felt soft against Finn's lips.

The moment is tender in it's own right, and yet it doesn't fail to have you craving for this silly man all over again. You nudge him with the sole of your foot, silently prompting him to continue.

Finn resumed his onslaught into your warm insides but with more adoring looks and complements that remind you that you're also worthy of his love and attention. "You're taking me so good... No one else can rile me up like this..." Finn calls out your name multiple times, feeling himself near the edge as his hips loose rhythm in favor of faster and harder pelvic thrusts that feel like he's straight up rearranging your guts.

"Finn, Finn please...please..." you find yourself begging, almost teary eyed.

Finn complies and smooches you one last time, driving you to that sweet sweet liberation that has you aching your back and wrapping your legs around Finn's waist, meanwhile he releases a combination of desperate whimpers and grunts as he empties a vast amount of pent up come inside your tight little hole that rushes out from around him and leaks into his bed sheets. The blow up has Finn crashing down on you, needing to tap him in the arm to remind him he's crushing you.

"My bad." he rolls sideways but not without pulling your against him, as he closes his eyes to take in the feeling of you body against his no matter how sweaty the two of you are.

You in return, appreciate his peaceful face from up close. To the scar on his cheek from the beard scattered over his lower jaw, he's marvelous, not to mention when he finally opens his eyes to look at you with those glistening pools of blue. "Like what you see?" he jokes, smiling at you despite the few missing teeth.

"Very much," you place a kiss on his nose, watching him scrunch it a bit.

"Well, if you stay for the weekend i can make it worth your time before you go back to mountain climbing." he states, which has you reconsidering.

"Hmm, actually i think I'll take an indefinite hiatus from traveling. Or atleast until i can get you something better than this dinosaur tooth i brought you." you accidentally slip up which has Finn sitting up with a knowing laugh of victory.

"Hah! I knew you brought me something!"

[igglemouse]

"So, how do I look? Human enough?" I ask my idiot assistant Dre with a hopeful smile. Dre Ogve is her name, yes, like me she only has two names. Two signifiers, I should say, a badge of shame amongst our kind. But that's not why I'm here, I'm here to blend in, and I know that humans really like standing out and so I've made a disguised that will do just that but in a more classy way. "How's the hair?"

Dre's eyes widen and her expression is that of pure horror. "Zer..." she starts to say, her voice a waver as she pretends as if she's seen some kind of accident. "Th-that's not how a normal human female looks!"

See, that's the problem with her, she thinks she knows everything. "Dre, what is the issue?" I'm genuinely confused. The pants are bright and pink, which I know is a color to signal to others that one is female, and it even has dots on it with a variety of soft colors. I'm wearing thick boots as well, just in case the terrain is rough, and my hair is what is currently in on this planet.

"Everything," Dre whispers, she acts as if I've physically assaulted her.

Alright, maybe I do need to work on my look a bit, but let's not let her off the hook here. I specially told her to secure me a suitable home here on this very planet and what has she found? I believe this is what you humans would call trash? I live in trash. Dust is every where, dirt is every where, and there is a strange smell that lingers in this place. From what I can tell, is this even a proper home?

"Dre, what is this? Was there nowhere else?" I demand, glaring at her. I have to be firm with her because honestly she's horrible at her job, just terrible. But she's also not very smart so what can you expect from an idiot?

"We had no simoleons because YOU insisted that they trade in bottle caps here, remember?" She dares to snap back, trying to shift the blame, as she always does. Yes, yes, I might have made a slight tiny miniscule miscalculation regarding the various forms of currency you all trade in but how can you blame me? There's like hundreds of them and besides...

"I WAS PLAYING A GAME BASED ON THEIR HISTORY AND BOTTLE CAPS WERE THE CURRENCY! WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE TO YOU?" I say throwing my hands up and am forced to deal with living in trash for now.

"A clown?" she says holding back laughter and the sound of her amusement really grates on my nerves. I hate her. I loathe her. Yet, what can I do with her? I'm so frustrated with her that I send her questions and queries mentally, too angry to speak. We Sixams can transmit thoughts and ideas and have entire conversations mentally. This isn't mind reading. One can only receive what what is sent to them and so I wonder what even is a clown? She sends an image back and I'm still confused.

"Yes Dre? I don't see why that is a bad thing?"

"A clown is a joke," she's smirking. I know this smirk, this expression. She's laughing at me. "A big walking joke, Zer, and that's what you look like. A fool. A dummy. A joke."

"Well why don't you show me YOUR disguise?" I snap back. I hate this being, truly, but she is also oddly endearing...in a very annoying kind of way and an impossible to get rid of kind of way.

"You're just going to copy me Zer, that's what you always do, copy me." She is so smug, I can see it on her face, I want to lug something heavy and smash her face with it...because she's not wrong. I would copy her, but that makes ME the genius since she's the one doing all the work and I'll make sure she knows that.

"That is how this works, Dre. You are MY assistant, so I take your suggestions, so give me a suggestion." I tap my foot to let her know that I'm growing impatient with her act.

She rolls her eyes and groans but she does help. Sending me a mental image of what I can look like and what she thinks would be considered normal on this planet. I guess it looks better, I'll just have to trust her on this.

But before I can work on changing my look I'll need a job so that I can escape this garbage of a home. I cannot take over this planet operating from here.

While I am here I'll work on cleaning things up, not only this 'house' but this planet because honestly you all have failed to do it. Plastic every where and I mean EVERYWHERE and trash in your seas. I honestly wonder how you all have made it this far?

But now it is time for my makeover. As I look at my reflection in a mirror I'm not exactly sure what's wrong with my look but again I'll trust Dre on this. She means well, usually...

There! I do think this is much better! Ah, I've almost forgot! I can't go around being called Zer and so I've come here with a name in mind. Priya Patel. Please do not ever refer to me as Zer, I wouldn't want to blow my disguise.

I looked around until I found a big metal can just laying up against a fence and to my surprise it was filled with tons of useful stuff. Do you humans just throw away things like this? So odd. So incredibly stupid. Perfectly good items, like a fully functional chair, just in the trash? Let me guess, you take this trash and then put it all in a LARGER pile of trash, don't you?

Welp, your loss is my gain and maybe if I find something valuable enough I can sell it and move out of my trash house. Sounds like a decent enough plan, for now.

I take that old dirty chair and put it into my recycler which I should point out is primitive. We Sixams have a way to turn any and every thing into energy. This chair? Yeah, we'd turn it into water. So you can figure my surprise when the recycler just turned it into more useful trash. Well, that's a start, it looks like it'll be on me to save your world before I can conquer it.

You are welcome, by the way.

I head back inside and find Dre sitting there on my couch. I'm not sure where she's been and honestly I do not care. She doesn't live here but she will have this annoying ability to just pop up when she feels like it. Typical of her. We are birth mates, by the way, coming from the same mother back on Sixam. I think you humans call that siblings? So this is why I have to stick by her, you must always be loyal to your birth mates, all fifty or so of them.

Today she's here to review my grand plan and I can tell she's going to be insufferable about this. "So...how exactly are you going to conquer the planet again?"

"Simple. I find their leader and mind control them and then become their leader," obvious right? See what I mean? She's stupid. You land and tell them 'Take me to your leader' and go from there. Humans are very susceptible to manipulation. You just speak to them mentally and they think your thoughts are theirs.

"Not so simple, Zer," she pushes out a sigh as if I'm the stupid one. "They have multiple leaders. Different continents, governments, and some are even capable of...powers," she tells me this as if it will make any difference to me. It does not because it does not make any sense actually.

"Dre, how can you have multiple leaders?" What is going on here? "Every planet has ONE leader. That's how it always works. Remember when-"

But before I can finish I see her wrigglers start wriggling (those are head tentacles) and squirm the way they usually do when she disagrees. "Not here," she sighs as if she's talking her a child. "Each piece of land here has leader, and that leader is under another leader. These leaders can sometimes even hate each other. Drop nuclear bombs on other countries...yes, on the same planet."

I don't even know how to respond to that. What's wrong with you people? Are you TRYING to blow up your own planet? I mean yes, we Sixams have destroyed a few planets, but we exist on countless planets, what's one more? Any ways... "Look, Dre, it doesn't matter. Which 'land' has the most power then? I'll go to their leader and-"

"Oh...oh no, you've done none of your research," she' says, no, she 's smirking at me with pity now, her tone a mockery of mines. This is typical of her, she always thinks she's better when really she's the dumb one. That much is clear. mocks.

"Dre, you silly little blob, doing the research is YOUR job. Remember? Besides, you are not making much sense. How does the planet get much done with no unified planetary government? Aren't their billions of these primates on this tiny world?" , that is your job, Dre. Besides, that makes no sense. How do they get anything done on this planet?"

Dre shrugs, her wrigglers curling to indicate confusion. "They manage, I guess? I feel like they don't get much done, at least not recently. Their first few thousand years they have progressed tremendously and then..." she makes a flat line with her hand.

"Well, I'll get things back up and running again. They just need a strong hand and some direction! We can treat them like the Ziplops of Beta Omicron On!" Oh what great times! The Sixams, we were at our height then! Unified and powerful! I would fondly roll around in the nostaglia of it but Dre, being the buzzkill that she is, has a worried look on her face.

"Ermm, Zer, the Ziplops are now extinct, thanks to the various intergalactic occupation of their homeworlds. I do not think that-"

"You think too much Dre! That is the issue! This is a planet that needs Sixam direction, clearly, and I am the one to do it!" This planet needs this. You beings are hopelessly inefficient. "So, where do we start?"

"Ahhm," she starts, I can tell she has more to say. Thankfully, she thinks better of saying it. "We'll need simoleons. These beings are very motivated by their currency and the more of it you have the more power you have on this planet."

Dre is such a softie sometimes. That's why she'll always just be an assistant, she doesn't have the strength or vision to do what is needed and fusses over tiny details like 'morals' and 'sentience'. Does that matter when a planet is in desperate need of order? No, not is not. But she is right about one thing, I do need simoleons.

So with that in mind I step out into the world and search for opportunities. I admit, I have no idea what I'm doing or where I'm going and so I eventually end up looking at a board. Unfortunately, it is primitive. You beings still use paper and basic writing tools? Well, at least the posters pinned to the board are about saving the planet and clean energy so at least a few of you dummies realize the peril your planet is in.

Perhaps there are some that could be useful to me? I'll make a mental note to investigate that further.

"Oh hey! What ya voting for!?" A woman calls out from behind and I immediately tense and give her my best defensive glare. I've heard stories you know, of the Sims In Black? A secret defense force trained to detect and eliminate outsiders like me. Could she be one or is this just a random citizen?

"Greetings human," I say cautiously, giving her a wave and a flick of my tongue to show her I am no threat. That's what you humans do, right? I try to wriggle my wrigglers but I forget you beings have hair...on your head.

"Umm, hey? Human?" She asks, thrown off clearly. Was it the wave? It must have been the wave. "What are you doing with your tongue?"

"Oh ummm, the air! The taste of the..." I stop, because I have a feeling I am only making things worse. So instead I glance over to the board. "So, you all vote for things huh? Someone suggests a policy and you all vote?" You humans seem oddly obsessed with voting. Under my rule, voting will be illegal and punishable by a quick and swift death.

"Ah yeah!" she perks up at least. "We all try our best! The past administrations have really failed this place you know? The air sucks, the water sucks, it all sucks! It tends to happen when you don't regulate the mega corps!" She seems excited. I'm not sure why. She also seems far smarter than the average human. This must mean...

"Are you the leader of this trash town?"

"Heyyy, Evergreen Harbor is not in the best place right now but I wouldn't call it garbage!" Oh great, I've offended her.

I look around and take in the brown hazy fog that fills the air, the heaps of actual garbage lying around randomly here and there, and a very toxic scent invading my nostrils and I start to wonder if she's blind, deaf, and senseless. I look around and see nothing but garbage. "There is LIT-ER-ALLY a pile of garbage right behind me."

"Umm, yeah," she falters some, shifting uncomfortably form foot to foot. "I guess so? Still, it's my home, it's not polite to-"

"Your stupidity is not polite," I snap back because I am losing patience. I'm out here for to earn simoleons or to find a leader. The latter is preferable as it is always your leader who assigns you your job. "Human, please bring me to your leader. The matter is urgent, if you could not tell."

"Umm, I can't say I'm on speaking terms with the Mayor. Tammy Hite, by the way!"

I can't help but scoff. "Two names, nine letters, you must be a disgrace to your birth group."

"Ummm, lady, are you okay?" she then gives me a strange look. A look I'm not liking. She's suspicious. "You're like waaay out of this world or not sober or-"

"Wait, what?!" She is on to me. My heart skips a beat and I can see a spark in her eyes, recognition. A bit of panic takes hold of me and I wonder if she really is this SIB agent that Dre warned me about before coming here. "N-no!" I stammer out, desperate now. "I-I'm very much part of this world, Human! Just like you! See! Look at my eyes!"

Instead of looking she does the opposite, turning her head away, backing up. "Heyy um, yeah you need to-"

"LOOK AT THEM!"

"Ummm, yeah, you have nice eyes..." she says but I'm not convinced the compliment is sincere. She looks uncomfortable? Edging backwards and away from me. "I-I need to go. Nice meeting you ummmm...."

"Zerrrrraaauummmm, I-I mean Preena Matel," I'm stammering again, my heart is beating again, my wrigglers are...they are not on my head right now but if they were they would be WRIGGLING! "Prita! No, no, Priya! Priya Patel! That's it!" I force a smile, the one I've practiced over and over again, hoping it covers the slip, flicking my tongue out to show here that I mean no harm.

"Alllrighty then..." she says slowly, taking another step back. "I'llseeyouaround!"

And off she goes. That was a close one. Maybe I do need to do a little more research.

Zer Avoi Index ~ Episode 1.2

[kaika7]

You're Not Alone

Despair Disease Nagito Komaeda x Shy/Awkward and GN! Reader

Summary: You visit Nagito Komaeda when he's ill with the Despair Disease and make sure he feels loved and not alone.

Warnings: Discussions of dying (no one actually dies!)

A/N: This is my first fic, so it's likely far from ideal. I hope you still get something out of this though!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You anxiously made your way to the hospital with Hajime and Fuyuhiko. Ever since Akane, Nagito, and Ibuki fell ill with the despair disease, you all decided to split into two groups to prevent it from spreading to everyone. Originally, just Hajime, Fuyuhiko, and Mikan were going to stay at the hospital with them, but you insisted on joining their group. Everyone was a little surprised by your insistence, but they went along with it. 

In truth, you were really worried about Nagito. Sure, he was a little scary before- especially during the first class trial. But, you couldn’t help but sense there was more to him beneath the surface. 

As you had tried to talk to him, he seemed quite delighted that you wanted to spend time with him. His face would light up every time you came by.

“Wow, I can’t believe someone like you wants to talk with trash like me!” He beamed with a cheery face.

Over time, he began to open up to you about his past, and you learned about his luck cycle. He had a beloved pet dog that got hit by a truck and passed away, but the dog allowed him to experience the joy of love and companionship. His parents died in a plane hijacking, but he survived, gained his independence, and a large inheritance. He was kidnapped by a serial killer and thrown in a dumpster, but he won millions of yen in a lottery ticket he found inside. He was diagnosed with stage three lymphoma and frontotemporal dementia, but he was accepted into Hope’s Peak academy. This caused Nagito to believe that if a horrific event happens, something amazing of equal magnitude will happen and vice versa. That’s where his belief in hope came from.

Despite his easygoing outward composure, you couldn’t help but sense a deep anxiety constantly brooding within him. Wherever he went with you, he would constantly be analyzing the terrain and the activities you’d be engaging in to make sure you’d be safe. He wouldn’t even go swimming with you because he casually said you could be taken away by a rip tide and stuck at the bottom of the ocean…. And then be eaten by a shark.

After learning all of this and seeing the way he treated you, you couldn’t help but sympathize with him…. and start to develop feelings for him. You were beginning to understand him more; he was not the malicious person others labeled him as. He did some questionable things for sure, but he did them with good intentions. Plus, his frontotemporal dementia was clouding his judgement, making him take things further than he normally would have. 

Yesterday, you went for a walk on the beach with him. His eyes constantly scanned the sand and occasionally darted to the water, as if he was looking for any sharp objects or crustacean that could injure you. When you sat down under the palm trees, he checked the trunk and branches to make sure it was sturdy and not going to break and fall. He also checked for any loose coconuts. Once he felt it was safe, he took a seat next to you.

“…I…” He stuttered, not looking at you. He just stared out into the ocean. “I’ve always been alone… never had anyone’s love. Not that I deserve it, but…I’m just so scared to die alone.” He stayed silent for a bit, and you were just speechless. You wanted to tell him so badly that he’ll never be alone. That you love him. You’ll stay by his side, but you just froze in the moment. The words in your mind could not make their way to your lips.

Sensing the silence, he quickly retracted his previous statement. “Ah, that was just a quote I read in a book somewhere! Speeches such as those can surely evoke sympathy in others, right?” His lips curved to form a plastic smile.

You could see right through his excuse, but before you could say anything, he apologized for “wasting your precious time” and left.

And now, you are going to visit him in the hospital with Hajime and Fuyuhiko. His lymphoma already made him so weak to begin with, but this despair disease really put his body over the edge. You really wondered if this would be the end for him.

“How’s everyone doing?” Fuyuhiko asked Mikan. 

“Akane and Ibuki are still ill, but they are stable. Nagito, on the other hand, is in quite a precarious state.” Mikan explained solemnly. “His pulse is so weak, and I’ve been tending to him nearly non-stop for the past day.”

“May we see him?” Hajime asked Mikan.

“Of course, but he’s not awake.” Mikan guided them to Nagito’s room and let them in. Nagito lay motionless in the bed in his hospital gown. His face was even paler than normal and he had a mildly pained expression on his face. Beads of sweat were formed on his forehead, and his chest rose and fell shallowly.

Your heart sank seeing him like this. Your anxieties only grew seeing just how badly he was doing. “Mikan, do you think he’ll make it through the night?” You solemnly asked.

“I-I will make sure I take care of him properly all night, so he will be okay!” Mikan squeaked out. “But…” Her voice grew more slow and serious. “It is possible that he won’t pull through, despite my best efforts. So… you may want to take a few minutes with him now.”

Fuyuhiko and Hajime stepped by Nagito’s bedside.

Fuyuhiko crossed his arms and looked down. “Goddammit, man. I know you are a pain in the ass, but we can’t have anymore people dying, ya hear me? We’re all getting off this damn island, and that includes you.” After he finished speaking, he abruptly turned around and walked out still looking down.

Hajime watched Fuyuhiko leave with a pained expression and took a deep breath before facing Nagito. “Nagito, I know things have been weird, but you gotta pull through, okay? Like Fuyuhiko said, we’re getting out of here together. And once you feel better, I-I want to try to understand you better.” Hajime let out a soft chuckle and a genuine smile. “Maybe we could even become friends.” 

Hajime started to slowly walk out, but he noticed your eyes welling with tears. “Hey… do you need a moment alone with him? I know you guys seem sorta close.”

You silently nodded your head. You definitely couldn’t talk with everyone around.

“Hey, Mikan. Do you think we can give Y/N a few minutes alone with Nagito?”

“Let me see…” Mikan quickly checks his vital signs and dabs the sweat off his forehead with a towel. “His fever is still high, and his pulse is still very low, but I suppose he doesn’t need me to tend to him for a few moments.” She looked up at you. “I can give you a few minutes, but if anything strange happens, please call me in, okay?”

You nod and Hajime and Mikan walk out of the room, closing the door behind them and leaving you alone with Nagito.

You stepped closer to his bedside and pulled over a chair so you could sit beside him. He looked worse close up. His hair even more disheveled than normal, and several strains of it stuck to the dried up sweat on his forehead. His eyebrows were furrowed with discomfort, and his lips were slightly parted as small gasps of air struggled to rhythmically flow between them.

You gently held his hand and looked at his shut eyes. “Nagito… I don’t think you can really hear or understand me right now… but I want you to know that I’m here.” You pause and nervously laugh to yourself. “I’m sorry I don’t always know what to say. It’s hard for words to come out sometimes. But, I hope you can at least feel the warmth of my hand and recognize my presence.” You took a shaky breath. “Please, please know that you will never be alone. I-I really love you, Nagito.”

You gave his hand a light squeeze, and put it over your heart. “I have to leave soon. But, please know that even if I’m not physically beside you, you will always be right here with me.”

Nagito remained unresponsive throughout this conversation, but fortunately his breaths remained constant. You sighed and rested his hand back along his side. Then, you began to get up. “I… I won’t say good bye tonight… You will make it through this! I’ll come visit you in the morning. I promise. I’ll see you soon…” 

You turned around and left the room, and Mikan immediately went back in to tend to Nagito. You, Hajime, and Fuyuhiko went back to your cottages with heavy hearts- hoping for the best.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You could barely sleep a wink all night, but you did manage to dose off for a little bit. You woke up to the sound of knocking on your cottage door. Groggily making your way to the door, you unlocked it and opened it a crack. Seeing it was Hajime, you opened it more and instantly woke up. With desperation in your tone, you quickly stammered, “H-Hi! Did you hear anything about Nagito?”

Hajime reassuringly smiled. “Yes, I came by to let you know Nagito’s condition has improved! Well, a little bit, anyway. He’s still not in good shape, but he can sit up in bed and talk now- though he says quite bizarre things…” He forced a chuckle and shrugged his shoulders. “You could try visiting him if you’d like, but I just saw him and he told me to hurry up and go away. He even said that he didn’t want to see my face anymore.” Hajime exasperatedly sighs.

You stood there dumbfounded for a minute, but adrenaline quickly rushed through your veins. “Hajime, you LEFT him after he said that?! I-I have to go now!!!”

You sprinted out the door, still in your pajamas, towards the hospital as Hajime turned around and watched you run with a confused look. Geez, this guy sure has a serious case of the clueless protagonist syndrome! Nagito has the liar form of the despair disease, which means he means the opposite of everything he says. The poor thing must be so scared of dying alone.

Finally making it to the hospital, you opened the door to his room with a wheeze. “N-Nagito. H-how are you? May I come in?”

Nagito did indeed look better than last night. His he was drooling a bit and still sweaty, but he was now propped up in bed with a glazed look in his eyes. He turned his head in response to your voice and said weakly, “I’m feeling quite excellent today! And I really need you to get as far away from me as possible. I want to be alone.”

You felt a pit form in your stomach. He certainly had improved, but he was not out of the woods yet. You walked closer to his bedside and looked compassionately at him. “I’m here, Nagito. I’m right here with you.” 

Upon looking at him more closely, your eyes drifted unconsciously to where his hospital gown loosely was wrapped around him, leaving his collar bones and upper chest exposed. Seeing his bare chest slowly rise and fall in synchronization with his breaths made your cheeks flush and your mind freeze. You were pretty inexperienced with love to say the least, so these feelings are hard for you to process.

Nagito began speaking again which made you snap out of your frozen state. “Y/N, I didn’t hear what you said to me yesterday. You’re a nasty person for not thinking about someone like me, Y/N.”

Holy crap, he actually HEARD YOU? He heard your love confession?! That has got to be the worst way to be confessed to. Ugh way to go, Y/N.

With a shaky voice, you began, “Oh, I- er… I’m sorry you had to hear it like that… But I really meant everything I said. I-I’ll never leave you alone, and-” You paused to take a nervous breath. “I love you…”

An ounce of focus and shock came through Nagito’s dazed eyes. “Really? I thought you were telling me the truth just to be mean to me?”

With a slightly more confident tone, you said, “No, I wasn’t just saying it to make you feel better… I really do love you. I’m so sorry about the other day. I was just so shocked, and I didn’t know what to say right away.”

Nagito sat there stunned for a moment, and his eyes slowly started to well with tears. “I-I hate you too, Y/N. You’re the most despicable and malicious person I’ve ever met. I have zero gratitude for the love you’ve shown me, and you’re so awful for letting me die alone. I truly deserve it.”

Your eyes grew wide in surprise as a gentle blush spread across your face. After a few moments, tears formed in your own eyes. You could barely believe that he reciprocated your feelings, but you pushed your own insecurities aside to focus on supporting him. “Nagito… may I hold your hand?”

He shook his head ‘No’, so you gently squeezed his hand. “You will get better. You won’t die here today. There’s always hope, remember?” You gave him a little smirk, which made a smile crack on his face. “But even if the worst does come, you won’t be alone. I’ll repeat myself a thousand times: I’ll always be with you. You’re not alone.”

At this point, the tears were already profusely streaming down Nagito’s face, so you grabbed a tissue to dab them away for him. “Y/N?”

“Yes?”

“I know this is truly a selfless request- I’m so wonderful for even thinking to ask this- but c-could you not hold me?”

You blinked in disbelief. “You want me to cuddle you, right now?”

“No, that’s the last thing I’d ever want to do in the world. But I’m truly considerate for even asking you this. I’m so not sorry for taking advantage of you like this, I-“

Mustering up all the confidence you could, you cut Nagito off by pulling his blanket down, and then climbing into the bed with him. You laid down next to him and gestured for him to lie down. With a shocked look, he quickly complied. You gently held him close to you, letting his head rest over your heart. You stroked his soft and fluffy white hair comfortingly, hoping to ease him of any discomfort.

“Y/N…” Nagito said with a blush forming on his face. The sound of your heart beat and the warmth of your embrace was so soothing to him. He was so touched starved, he didn’t even remember the last time he was hugged. He never had experienced anything like this before.

“I’m here, and I always will be. You’re not alone, Nagito.”

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

Entertain us with some stupid Bonaparte facts plz.

Hahaha I've answered a lot of these, so there will be some repeats, and I'm not sure any of these could as stupid facts but they're all things I enjoy thinking about from time to time:

I love that he was described as having a lovely smile that could change the weather if he was turning on the charm (also his eyes were described as one of his chief charms). People also described him as having more the air of a scholar than that of a soldier.

That said, Napoleon didn't do small talk so much as a full-frontal barrage of questions which uh...isn't intimidating at all.

Napoleon liked to say he was born on a rug embroidered with an image of Caesar but Letizia apparently replied to that story with “is it not enough that he was born, but it must be upon a rug decorated with Caesar?” (or something to that effect). 

One time on St. Helena he got Barry O'Meara champagne drunk and teased the man about this lass he was in love with and was like "you're in your thirties, you need to get married!" and O'Meara was like "ummmm I've no money and am not ready" and Napoleon was like "nonsense".

In general, Napoleon loved playing matchmaker. He wasn't very good at it but he loved it anyway. He was an eighty-year old nosey, gossipy, match-scheming grandma at heart.

Napoleon enjoyed snuff but wasn't super graceful taking it so there'd be snuff powder on his suit coats sometimes. He would also fidget with the snuff boxes and regularly lost them.

Indeed, Napoleon was one of life's fidgeters. Which, coincidentally, made him difficult to shave. Constant recounts in his memoir:

[Napoleon] frequently talked, read the papers, moved round on his chair, turned suddenly, and I was obliged to use the greatest precaution to avoid wounding him. … When by chance he did not talk, he remained immovable and stiff as a statue, and one could not make him lower, raise, or bend his head, as would have been necessary in order to accomplish the task more easily. He had also one singular mania, which was to have only one side of his face lathered and shaved at a time. He would never let me pass to the other side until the first was finished.

One of Marie-Louise’s pet names for him was Nana and she would call him that in front of courtiers and Very Important People and Napoleon rolled with it. 

His favourite book was the epic poem Ossian because Napoleon liked campy over-the-top epics. Joseph would later try and claim his brother's favourite book was the Illiad (if I remember right) because Ossian was considered trash literature at the time. Like if Napoleon's favourite book was Game of Thrones and his brother is like "no, trust me, it's War and Peace. It's Real Literature~~. It's Dante's Inferno. It's anything that is More Serious. Please believe me".

He was a terrible rider, though he rode " very boldly and recklessly" (according to one of his secretaries). Napoleon loved to Go Fast - bit of an adrenaline junky I suspect. He was also known to ride for hours - the stamina was insane - and he was not easily deterred by treacherous terrain.

He was described by a cavalry officer as riding "like a butcher". Quote from Ernst von Odeleben, the cavalry officer in question:

Napoleon himself remarked at one time…that he had learned a great many things, but had never been able to make himself a complete horseman. His make was not indeed calculated for equitation. When he galloped, he sat carelessly in the saddle, generally holding the reins in his right hand, while the upper part of his body was jumbled, as the horse went on, forward, or on one side, and his left hand hung negligently down. If the horse made a false step, he immediately lost his balance. [...] As he was not a good horseman, all those who approached him mounted upon a mare were obliged to be cautious that they were not thrown out of the saddle by the capers of his horse. [...] Napoleon was passionately fond of going across the fields, without letting any person know whither he bent his course. The chasseurs of the guard were so accustomed to this habit, that by the first direction which he took, they became perfectly well acquainted with the place towards which he was going. He was so fond of bye-ways and paths, that finding himself, on several occasions, in craggy places, or impracticable roads, he was obliged to alight: it was always a disagreeable thing to him to hear of difficulties or impossibilities…and he seldom abandoned his intention til he was himself convinced of the impossibility of proceeding. 

Naturally, Napoleon did take some epic falls off his horses from time to time. This is the man who would trip and break his face if he wasn't careful.

Napoleon would sing upon occasion, though he couldn't carry a tune in a bucket. Songs he liked included various tunes from the opera Henri IV, also the Marseillaise, various songs from the revolution &c. One of his favourite composers was Giovanni Paisiello.

---

I shall stop there. Thank you for the ask!

[mezzy-1]

VICTORY!!!

I played my friend's Pathfinder Team in Kill Team for my first game and WON. We have yet to decide on lore, but I'll assume his team was attempting to protect an Ethereal from our hunting crew, more on that later. We played in the University architecture building on his model, which was super nice. Despite my evil faction doing what it did best, it was an awesome game and I am thankful for him playing me. Here's what happened:

We deployed very poorly at the start, but we eventually got his grenadier and my Heavy Gunner vaporized his drone. He ended up playing around the building and managed to snipe my gunner. I got shot up a lot, and my cover game was absolute trash for the first round. Buuuuut I did pick enough of them off, and shut down a firing lane with a smoke. I pulled some Valorant level smoke placement.

I hugged terrain a lot after I got sniped to hell, and took a few important losses from good shots. RIP Elixicant, you will be Ultimately, I via extermination because I was killing an insane amount of T'au. He did get a good moment were his medic helped another operative weather a near lethal assault by my Disciple of Yaelindra. For the battle report, I would like to say that because they failed to keep my team away, they managed to kidnap an Ethereal. Hope the blue bastard doesn't mind having a, cultural exchange with an exceptionally creative Haemonculus... >:)

(Blue is such a vibrant color for a Pain Engine, do you agree?)

[itsbenedict]

Games I Played In 2024 And Whether Or Not I Thought They Were Good (Part 3/4)

[1] - [2] - 3 - [4]

More of them! I've been doing these roughly in chronological order so I'm going to have more to say about these ones probably.

Another Crab's Treasure

Haaaaaah. Mixed feelings on this one!

The idea is that it's a Dark Souls game, only, like, vibrant and colorful and ocean-themed. You're a hermit crab who's trying to get his shell back! Cute!

First off: if you get this game, do not get it on the Switch. It is broken on Switch. Like, crashes regularly, freezes up on simple object interactions, drops frames all the time... it's rough. I've seen LPs of people playing the PC version, where it looks and plays much better, so that's probably what you want to do instead. I'm shocked Nintendo let them release it on their store in this state.

And... that kind of colors my perception of the gameplay, too, because it turns out soulslike difficulty gets way more frustrating if you're usually dying to the game freezing up during an enemy attack, or the camera getting stuck where you couldn't see the tell animation, or some other technical issue that completely wasn't your fault. I was fighting the game every step of the way.

That said, I can easily see the version of the game that works, and the gameplay's pretty fun! The various shell powers, the rolling mechanics, and the smart enemy design make it really smooth to play when it's actually running at full FPS. The environment design is also really good, and overall it's very well-executed.

Hated the story, though. What a mess. It's... totally thoughtless doomer nonsense, whose primary message is "capitalism bad!" while completely failing to depict any capitalism and instead having the government be bad. It's all half-formed ideas from people with no model of how the world actually works- just a vague sense of anger at powerlessness and disenfranchisement, directed at incoherent strawmen. The speech where the evil corrupt mayor tells you that laws exist to make it legal for him to kill anyone who defies him is especially eye-rolling- as is the strawman of techno-optimism who shows up as the surprise final boss. Just idiotic stuff.

None of its metaphors even work on its own terms- like the thing where pollution is a nebulous force of corruption caused by greed in the hearts of the crabs who hoard trash, except that the greedy trash hoarders live in the clean colorful heights and the poors with no trash live in the polluted undercity with too much trash. Wait, what? Yeah.

Fun though.

Loop Hero

This one was really cool! It feels like there's some potential it had that it didn't realize, but I enjoyed it as a smaller experience anyway.

The idea is... the world's been destroyed, and you can sort of bring it back by remembering. As you walk along this desolate looped path autobattling enemies in search of a boss, you can put down tiles that change it- biomes that spawn different types of monsters, buildings that give you buffs, and terrain with global effects. As you progress, you unlock more types of tiles, and learn synergies between different types of tiles that create new effects.

There's a lot of these, and they're really cool. Like, put down nine mountains or hills in a square, and bam, you get a tall peak that spawns harpies to fight. Or put forests next to a lightning tower, and get burning forests that, uh, I think lower everyone's HP or something? Place a light source next to a field, and it blooms with flowers, doubling its XP bonus or whatever it is those do.

My problem I think is just that there's not enough of them. Each type of tile has between two and four different kinds of interactions with other tiles, and you don't really get too many elaborate combos. Most types of tiles ignore each other. I kind of wish there'd been a little more depth to these systems, with more surprising interactions with older terrain types as you unlocked new ones. Let me run a river past a spider nest and get diving bell spiders, or put a storm tower next to a vampire castle to spawn frankensteins! The surprise tile synergies were the most exciting part, and there was definitely room to include more of them.

The story had some kind of cool things to say about, like, the weight of creation, passing judgment on the world, deciding what has the right to exist. I don't know that it really explores it fully, but there's something there!

Hades II

Yep, this thing's in early access! And no surprise: it's good as hell. I've wasted far too much time in it.

Gameplay-wise, it's going to be pretty familiar if you've played Hades, but there's a few major changes. The most impactful, I've found, is that you only get one dash. No upgrading it with the mirror or getting more from Hermes- you get one, and then can hold down the button to run slightly faster if you gotta move fast. This makes Melinoe play very differently from Zagreus, who favored getting in close and overwhelming foes with a flurry of blows before zipping back out with dashes when things get hairy. Melinoe needs to stay safe a lot more than Zag does, and relies on her ranged options to do so.

(There's also a few other tweaks- every attack comes with a charged version that costs mana from a mana bar, olympian calls are replaced with "moon blessings", and of course all the weapons are new and take some getting used to- but the dash is the biggest thing.)

The story, this time, is fascinatingly weird. It concerns a war between the gods and the titan Chronos, and... it's not entirely clear if you're on the right side of it. They play up how callous and evil the gods are with respect to mortal life, and have multiple supporting characters who put this concern front and center where Hades 1 kind of sidelined it. But Melinoe is this weird, uptight honor student type of character with a strong sense of propriety and familial loyalty, and kind of doesn't care about that compared to her quest to rescue her family.

It keeps, like... dropping hints that you're not really on the right side, here? Chronos is personally unpleasant and loathsome, but you keep getting little hints that what he's actually doing is an improvement over how the gods were running things. Various character arcs seem to be headed in a "the gods suck and you should stick up for your non-god friends" direction, but...

...I mean, they can't actually do that, can they? Just, structurally! It's a roguelike, meant to be infinitely replayable! Hades 1 had a pretty elegant resolution to that problem, reframing the gameplay as something that can fit without the central conflict, but I can't imagine how Hades 2 could possibly do that. An entire section of the world takes place on a fleet of ghost ships sailing to join the war effort! Even Melinoe failing to grow and just winning seems incompatible with the game continuing. A good chunk of the game doesn't exist without the conflict! I don't see how they can possibly put a bow on all this, and I'm excited to see how they try.

Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door

My favorite game from my childhood has received an updated rerelease on Switch... and they did it right. You gotta check this out.

I've talked about why TTYD is great before- I think one of the first posts on this blog, waaaaaay back in the day when my posts were bad and you shouldn't go looking for them? But the upshot is: the battle system uses small numbers, and you can figure out exactly what kind of damage you can dish out and take in a given turn, and plan your risk-taking and resource management around it precisely- in a way you can't really do when you've got big damage numbers with RNG ranges of outcomes. All the risk is in the execution of your guards and special moves, which let you attempt harder inputs in exchange for more favorable outcomes, with a chance that you'll fail because you fucked up,

Going back to it after so long... honestly, with fresh eyes, the writing isn't quite as lively as I remember? Like, I remember a big reason I was disappointed by later PM games was that there were no partners, or that the partners didn't really talk or figure into the story. But... honestly, TTYD does have that same problem, outside of the chapters where those characters are introduced. Once someone's In Your Party, their relevance is kind of over, and they all deliver pretty similar filler lines while out. That's something they could maybe improve on in a proper sequel.

Still, the writing generally remains sharp and very funny, and the variety of scenarios it throws at you are great. And the remake adds a few things that really enhance the experience- like new remixes of the battle theme for every chapter, and extra animations for every character, even the random background nobodies. You can hit NPCs with your hammer and they'll play a little "hey, ow!" animation now! Different characters get different dialogue bleep sounds! And they added a warp hub for backtracking, so the General White quest isn't so tedious! And a warp pipe between Creepy Steeple and Twilight Town, to cut out like an hour of pointless backtracking! All the changes they made were really smart.

(Including: putting Vivian's trans stuff back in the script, after it was cut in the original localization. Good on you, Nintendo!)

Pokérogue

I was weak. I held out two months, and then gave in. And I regret everything.

This fucking thing ate multiple months of my life. It's... infuriatingly addictive. It boils the Pokémon experience down to this ultra-tuned flow state, with accelerated levelups and mechanics to streamline the game into a roguelike form factor, and it's so goddamn tight. Every moment of it is setting you up with a thing you can do next, so there's no stopping points- just new goal after new goal after new goal. It totally hijacked my brain until I beat the damn thing into submission, doing absolutely everything it's possible to do in it.

Except "ever voluntarily using Skwovet", because fuck that thing.

Don't play this. It's bad for you.

Elden Ring: Shadow of the Erdtree

Technically not a new game, but the DLC is basically an entire new game, with a map about the size of the base game and its own progression system and story.

I don't have too much to say about the DLC itself! It's More Elden Ring. Miquella's story is cool and tragic, the final boss was a terrifying surprise, and the new environments and enemy designs were sick as hell. If you liked Elden Ring for those things, there's more of it here! 'Nuff said.

What stuck out to me was... I started a new character and a whole fresh playthrough of the game, because I didn't know what the entry point to the DLC was. And while last time, I built a strength-focused warrior with tons of HP, this time I decided to try out a totally different build and play a squishy wizard with ranged attacks. And the game was so different like that! Still balanced, still fun, but completely a different game.

Instead of being about getting in close, staying in close, and sticking around for a long time while finding openings to attack, it became about staying at a safe distance, dodging projectiles, and retaliating with nuke spells to end fights before bosses could get much of a chance to hit me. Some areas that were a huge problem for me before were trivialized by my reusable ranged blasts, and some areas that were no trouble were suddenly a difficulty cliff because there was no way to be effective at range. I'm surprised at how much of a transformation it was! Impressive feat of design.

WEBFISHING

This is a cute little multiplayer fishing game based off Animal Crossing's fishing system. It's a relaxing little second-screen game without too much going on! Not too much to say about it- it does what it sets out to do. Kinda wish they'd tried a little harder for some of the fish "jokes", though- a lot of them are anti-humor about not having a joke for this one. I will retaliate by... not having much of a review for this one.

DEATHLOOP

This thing was fuckin' cool. You're an amnesiac trapped in a time loop- but not just any time loop. The people on this island came here specifically to trap themselves in a time loop, where they could kill each other and live out hedonistic fantasies with no consequences, but something fucked up and now only you and a crazy lady who's trying to kill you are actually experiencing the loop. For everyone else, it's their first day, and they don't take kindly to you trying to break the loop and ruin their fun.

In order to break the loop, you have to kill a bunch of important assholes (called "Visionaries") who've somehow anchored the loop to themselves. But you've got to do it in a single day, and they're scattered all over this huge island- so you've got to come up with a plan. Find ways to manipulate where they'll be at what times, when they'll be vulnerable, and line up that perfect killstreak.

It's fun stuff. Initially, it seems impossible- they're too spread out, too inaccessible, too heavily-defended. But as you work on figuring them out one at a time, you learn lots of little details about gaps in their defenses, ways to fuck with their routines, and traps you can set for them so they'll die without you needing to be present. It's like a mystery game, even though the minute-to-minute gameplay is a pretty standard stealth action shooter.

(Said gameplay's pretty fun on its own- though weirdly, the starting pistol pretty much kills everything in the game in one headshot and has perfect accuracy, so I'm not sure why they bother giving you other guns. I upgraded to Frank's SMG which is basically the same gun but it reloads instantly, and basically never needed to use anything else.)

The story's... a little weird. It tries to focus on the relationship between Colt and Julianna (your also-looping nemesis trying to stop you from breaking the loop), but like... she's not... there, except as an annoying random superboss encounter that sometimes spawns in the middle of you trying to do other shit. She's just a voice over the radio that snarks at you and doesn't have any relationships with any of the other characters.

So like, ultimately you learn a twist about who she was to you before you lost your memory, and she explicates her reasons for wanting to protect the loop, and there's like, some decent character work being done there?

Buuuuuut, in attempting to foreground this character dynamic and make it the main resolution to the game, they kind of forgot to give a satisfying resolution to anything else. Like, these seven people you spend the whole game obsessively stalking and learning everything about so you can efficiently murder them in one go... don't really get a resolution other than being anticlimactically murdered. And there's like no resolution to like, what is the loop and how does it work and why did it get fucked up and what are the stakes here. It's all so meticulously done that I get the impression some writer somewhere answered these questions while plotting it, but they just either didn't put any of it in the game, or I missed something huge.

One negative I will say is: this thing made my old computer overheat like instantly. I had to build a proper gaming PC before I could run this thing- and that was in fact my main motivation for building it, was because I wanted to play this game without my laptop melting. Not really playable on smaller machines, even on minimum settings.

-

One more coming down the line, for the games I played but didn't beat this year, and that should do it!

[1] - [2] - 3 - [4]