#the last angsty thing i write for february!!

[tennessoui]

wip wednesday (early cause im offline tmrw)

When the dust settles, Obi-Wan is surprised to find himself still standing.

It takes all of him, he thinks, the end of the war. It takes everything he has.

He used to wonder, in a distant, nebulous way, what it would feel like in the aftermath. How his life would return to the routines he held before Geonosis, if the cadence of Temple life would feel strange and unfamiliar to him after so long spent in the trenches. If he would miss the sound of his men behind and around him, the steady stream of words and laughter and presence of others, at all times, surrounding him.

It’s only when the dust settles, when the first grains of sand whip through the arid desert air to sting his eyes, that he realizes that every time he ever allowed himself to think about the end of the war, he’d always assumed that they would win. He had never truly thought they would be defeated. That the Jedi Order, the Temple itself, so strongly entrenched in the galaxy and in Coruscant and in Obi-Wan’s world view, were capable of falling.

He had cautioned others against the same assumptions the moment he heard them. He had warned his own padawan to not look too far into the future, to not plan too much for the war’s end. He had told many people—clones, civilians, holonet reporters, other Jedi—that it was dangerous to think of the war as something they would inevitably win. Nothing was inevitable, especially not victory.

But he realizes now, only now, only as he traverses the desert on the back of a stolen eopie, wearing robes still smelling so strongly of volcanic sulfur that his eyes are stinging with reactionary tears, that he’d thought. He’d always thought. 

He’d never really considered…this.

This aftermath, where he is still standing on shaking legs and everything that he has ever cared for in the world has become ash, has become the dust settling around him.

Everything he has ever known and loved and fought for has slipped through his fingers. When the dust settles, when he looks down at his hands, he expects to find them empty.

Instead, there is a baby in his arms.

And he knows—he knows intimately how much damage these hands are capable of. What hurt these hands can inflict even on those he loves. Loved. 

He knows, as the homestead rises up in the fading light of the two suns, that these hands should not cradle this baby. Not the son of the man he has murdered. Not his brother’s son. Not his padawan’s. Not Anakin’s.

He knows the babe is safest here on this farm in the care of this couple. He knows he must leave the child with them, to raise and love a thousand times better than he is capable of. He has tried before. He has failed one Skywalker already.

He knows. 

And he can’t. He cannot let him go.

While the Galactic empire rises on one side of the galaxy, the dust settles on the other and Obi-Wan Kenobi looks down at the babe in his hands and realizes that he cannot let him go.

Not another Skywalker.

[agentstarkid]

SERENDIPITY ✦ DR3

“Serendipity is an unexpected and very lucky finding, that is, a coincidence that fills us with happiness. Serendipity in love implies the feeling that the universe conspires in our favor, bringing that special person into our lives at the right time and oh boy, did the universe send her everything she ever needed in the form of a 5'10" man with a built-in accent, a love for Tim Tams, adrenaline-fueled spirit and a smile that could light up a whole town.”

✦ pairing: daniel ricciardo x famous!latina!reader

✦ type: social media au

✦ face claim: becky g

✦ warnings: female!reader, covid-19 & quarantine mentions, age gap, language.

✦ pit wall live: HAPPY FRIENDSHIP DAY BESTIES! 🤗💗 I've been working on this for a month, honestly I thought I was gonna finish it fast but tbh that was really naïve of me 🥴 the amount of times I ended up changing almost every little thing is insane lol but today I sat down and commited to finish and post this! this is my first ever smau or any kind of 'x reader' really, so please be kind 🤍 and of course it was going to be about the love of my life!

— oh btw, my idea is to get to present time and make it angsty so let me know what you guys think! I really hope you enjoy!

─── The Joker & The Queen (Masterlist)

JANUARY 01, 2020

yourinstagram and danielricciardo added to their stories!

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danielricciardo has followed yourinstagram!

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yourinstagram

♡ liked by anitta, danielricciardo and 6,546,214 others

yourinstagram 2019 was full of happiness, pain, healing and growth. I loved a lot, I cried a lot and I laughed a lot. I'm grateful for a lot of things in life, but I'm specially grateful for you guys ❤️🥂 I LOVE YOU! ❤️

tagged: selenagomez, fioamato, iamdannaschwarz, itsvittoriasousa

View all 17,321 comments

fioamato It's out with the old and in with the new ⏭️😜

iamdannaschwarz this could be the start of something new indeed 😏🤭 yourinstagram 🙈 user yourinstagram girlieee does this mean you found your Troy Bolton tonight? 👀👀👀

iamdannaschwarz what a year it has been! Through the ups and downs you prevailed. So proud of you! Cheers, amiga! 🥂❤️

itsvittoriasousa u deserve the whole world, i wish everyone knew ur heart 🥺 love you biiiiiiig ❤️

user1 can we talk about that dress!!!! jaw dropped 🤯

user2 Mami 🔥🔥🔥

selenagomez ❤️🥂🎆

user3 danny ric you ain't slick baby we can see u 👀

user4 words on the streets that they were seen pretty close the whole night 👀

user5 girlies do we think the writing on the napkin belongs to mr. ricciardo? 🧐

user4 what about the last pic?? could it be about a nod to him???

user3 somebody call the fbi and the cia we need to decode this 🔎🔎🔎

sebastianyatra una locura de año 🚀 happy new year penguin!

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JANUARY 25, 2020

justjared

♡ 9.075 Likes

justjared New couple alert?! YN LN, 21, and Formula 1 driver Daniel Ricciardo, 30, were spotted on a walk and getting cozy during a night out in New York. More photos now on JustJared.com #YNLN #Daniel Ricciardo Photos: Backgrid

View all 214 comments

user1: well that's a couple nobody saw coming 😶 good for them tho

user2: These pictures are so creepy as to get these they literally have to stalk these people and are probably hiding in bushes or wherever to get the shots

user3: he's a full-grown man in his 30s messing around with a teenager how shocking 🙄

user4: how is she a teenager if she's 21??? she is a consenting adult and has been for a while...make it make sense user5: it's a 9-year age gap not 25 😑 y'all should learn to mind your own fucking business

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FEBRUARY 05, 2020

danielricciardo added to their story!

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yourinstagram added to their story!

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yourinstagram

♡ liked by danielricciardo, greeicy and 7,452,325 others

yourinstagram starry nights, sunsets, little moments, deep conversations & special feelings 💖🃏

View all 19,358 comments

iamdannaschwarz pov: you were there to witness the first conversation 🤣

itsvittoriasousa never knew a person could blush that hard 😂 yourintagram you are both getting blocked 🙅‍♀️

fioamato 🃏🃏🃏

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michaelitaliano and scottyjames31 have followed yourinstagram!

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MARCH 11 & 12, 2020

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yourinstagram has added to their story!

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APRIL 09, 2020

yourinstagram

♡ liked by danielricciardo, jbalvin and 5,723,498 others

yourinstagram Quarantine with an aussie boyfriend: turns out, 'G'day mate' is the only greeting you'll ever need. Who needs handshakes anyway? Also, you get to excessively use the word 'mate' without being judged. It's basically a linguistic free pass 🤷🏽‍♀️😂🇦🇺

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user: OMG OMG IT'S FUCKING HAPPENING!!!! EVERYBODY STAY CALM!!!

user: Dan-Y/N nation how we feeling today? 😍

user: wasn't she dating sebastianyatra tho?

user2: nah they've been friends for years

user3: «cristina» is lowkey about her tho 🤭 "you were 19, i was 23"?? and there's a 4 year age gap between them?? they deffff had something going on a few years back AT LEAST 👀

user2: who knows maybe they did, but they refer to each other as "like-a-brother" and "like-a-sister" so as far as we know they are only best friends 🤷🏽‍♀️

fioamato what do you say titi yourmomsinstagram does it get the seal of approval?

yourmomsinstagram 🤔🤔🤔 yourinstagram she face-timed me and told me to pass the phone so she could talk to him. They talked for an hour. They are besties now, she's just trying to play hard-to-get 🙃

danielricciardo and 5,345 other liked it

fioamato 😂😂😂

jbalvin encantado de verte feliz hermanita ❤️

danielricciardo tell your boyfriend he's really lucky 🤙🏼

yourinstagram thanks will do, mate 🤙🏼

user OMG??? you guys are so unserious 😭

user2 MOM??? DAD???

user3 danielricciardo yourinstagram i'm glowing, flourishing and thriving 🥰😭

michaelitaliano shitty accent though

yourinstagram I love my haters ❤️ you guys are my motivators ☺️ btw don't you have a kangaroo to fight?

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APRIL 29, 2020

yourinstagram

♡ liked by michaelitaliano, danielricciardo, lewishamilton and 6,498,498 others

yourinstagram Spanglish country…we’re doing it!! Watch kanebrown_music and I blend sounds, languages and dance moves in #LostInTheMiddleOfNowhere (Spanish Remix) 😜 song and video OUT NOW 🔥

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iamcardib OKAAAY MAMAAA 🧊🧊🥶

lali ALTA DIOSA 🔥

user she 👏 never 👏 misses 👏

itsvittoriasousa BRO U ABSOLUTELY ATEEE

user jaw drops to floor eyes pop out of sockets hearts out of chest 😍

danielricciardo wow caliente 🔥

user the amount of unwell I am in this exact moment

user2 daniel is right. muy caliente 🥵

user3 i'm losing my mind over 2 words + emoji okay

user4 daniel stop being a cunt and make an appearence in one of Y/N's ig lives

user5 user4 you could totally hear his voice in the last one lmao

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MAY 03, 2020

danielricciardo

♡ liked by pierregasly, jensonbutton, iamdannaschwarz and 710,610 others

danielricciardo Just a bunch of life 🤠🚜🇦🇺🇺🇸

View all 1,097 comments

yourinstagram awesome taste in music mate 👍🏼

danielricciardo big fan of hers 👍🏼 love finding new underground artists ☺️ user imagine calling THE yourinstagram an "underground artist" lmaooo user2 they're both such little shits i love them your honor 😭

kristenanniebell ❤️❤️❤️

scottyjames31 I see you're in good company mate

corey_wilson goodness I miss the ranch so much

user daniel said lemme give you thirsty bitches a few droplets of water

user2 there's so much to unpack here omfg

iamdannaschwarz you're welcome 😌 also there's a no-return policy in the contract ok bye

fioamato you're welcome 😌 x2 itsvittoriasousa you're welcome 😌 x3 danielricciardo nah i think i'm gonna keep it for a long while thanks. i'll rate you guys with 5 stars 👍🏼

user3 THE LETTER ON THE LAST PHOTO ???? I'M SENDING Y'ALL MY THERAPY BILLS

user4 THE MATCHING RINGS PLEASE!!!!!!! 😭😭😭

user5 all this soft launch shit is killing me guys help somebody let them know that we already know so they can stop playing!!!

yourinstagram but where's the fun in that babes? 😌 user holy shittttt!!!! y/n ???? i- 🤯 user5 OH MY GOD!!!! HI MOTHER AJKFFLAHDASD user2 it's a fucking confirmation!!!! dan-y/n nation we got it!!! it's crumbs but we got it!!!!!

user6 we stan a suportive bf ☝️🤩

user7 999 for grammy's best album of the year ✨manifesting✨

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─── Please don't forget to reblog & comment! ♡

[freshbakedbreadstick]

No. 1 Party Anthem - Mikey Berzatto x F!Reader - Prologue

Past!Mikey Berzatto x F!Reader

Carmy Berzatto x F!Platonic!Reader

Richie Herimovich x F!Platonic!Reader

Summary: After running for so long, it was time to come home

Warnings: All my fics are 18+ regardless of the content. Heavy spoilers and angst. Mentions of death, mental health issues, and toxic relationships. It’s not graphic or detailed in this one but I just want to warn you now that this series will deal with extremely heavy topics as it goes on (similar to the show).

Word Count: 1.6k

A/N: Hey bestiesssssssssss!!! This is my first ever series and actually first ever written work that I'm posting lol and I'm so excited for it!!! I'm starting off with a series because i had this really good and angsty idea while reading ANOTHER fantastic piece of work and was like “fine…….. I'll do it myself” so i'm here now writing it lmao anyways i'm starting off posting my fanfics with Mikey and Carmy because i've been a little too focused on The Bear lately n love them so much. Chapter one of this series should be coming up this time next week so dw abt waiting so long for an update!! Anyways i hope you all enjoyyyy <3

MASTERLIST

The cool Chicago night air nips at you as it blows by, rolling along the exposed skin of your arms. It was 3 in the morning and the street where The Original Beef of Chicagoland stood was empty and silent.

The building stood before you, quiet and lifeless. It was odd seeing it so silent and it almost seemed… peaceful. But one glance at the rusting sign that seemed to be barely hanging onto the building made the façade of tranquility fall.

The knot in your stomach grew as your eyes traced over the rusted sign and then onto the walls that showed cracks and age. The sidewalk wasn’t any better with uneven cement and haphazard patching. Just then, a piece of trash rolled by the curb, coming from the alley right next to The Beef. 

It was just like how you remembered it. 

The wear and tear was what originally made you appreciate it. It showed use and love, the same way that laugh lines around a person’s mouth showed you that they lived a life full of smiles and laughter. The walls were in use as hundreds filed in and out of the building for their favorites, every week. The floor was worn away underneath the soles of families, drunk friends, older couples, working folk, and more. The ungentrified building made the whole thing feel nostalgic, despite not being a building you were around as a child. It had felt… familiar in a both comforting and melancholic way. 

But now, seeing the building, especially with its marks of age, made your blood run like ice through your veins. It made you shiver, despite it being September in Chicago. 

What once was a warm and inviting place felt cold and even scary. 

It had been months since you spoke to the Berzattos. Actually, it had been months since you were in Chicago at all. About 8 months, that is. You left in February after… everything and never looked back. The east felt too familiar at that point, so you traveled west.

You chased the highs and avoided the lows, moving from one place to another until you settled in a quiet town where you felt loved. But that love didn’t come without its challenges and when it got hard, you did what you knew best and that was leaving. 

So you left with no clue as to where you were going, too proud but mainly too afraid to reach out to the family you had in Chicago. You drove with a car full of junk you couldn't even stand looking at anymore for all the memories of the past couple of months attached to them made your stomach churn. With no place to go, you found yourself, 5 days after leaving and living in your car, sitting on the hood of your 2002 Chevy Impala, stopped and watched the sunset of the west for the last time at a rest stop in the middle of nowhere with your head hurting and eyes puffy. It was then when your phone buzzed. 

The cracked screen blinked brightly as you glanced over at it.

‘Please come home, we miss you - Nat’

Your mouth dried as you read the message. Your heart pounded in your ears as your eyes raced over the words over and over and over.

‘Please come home, we miss you’

‘Please come home, we miss you’

‘Please come home, we miss you’

‘Please come home, we miss you’

‘Please come home, we miss you’

‘Please come home, we miss-

Another message popped up then, interrupting your reading and making you jump. 

‘I promise it’s okay’

Your hands trembled. How Sugar got your number after you changed it twice to avoid your ex from the west was a mystery but it almost felt like divine intervention as you read it under the glow of the cotton candy clouds in the sky. 

‘Come home’

So you made the decision to go back. 

To go home. 

But this decision didn’t mean that you were leaving right away; for two months you practically lived in motel rooms and in your car, pacing back and forth for hours in parking lots, empty hallways, and tiny motel rooms at the thought of facing everyone again. Would they be upset? Angry? Sad? Would they hate you? Welcome you with open arms? Especially after abandoning them the way you did? 

Some nights were spent breathing deeply and slowly, desperately trying to get your heart to beat at a reasonable pace and other nights were spent with tears streaming down your cheeks. You almost even decided to just not come home at all; it felt like moving out of the country and assuming a new identity would be easier to deal with than going home.

But you got yourself together and after pawning everything you didn’t mind parting with for cash, you drove with a lighter trunk and a lighter heart across the country and eastward toward Illinois. 

Before you knew it, the giant ‘WELCOME TO ILLINOIS, THE LAND OF LINCOLN’ sign had appeared in your vision. It greeted you like an old friend, making your eyes sting and your chest tighten as your car zoomed by it. 

Two hours away from Chicago, your stomach would not stop growling so you decided to stop and grab a bite to eat. After settling your car at a nearby park next to an empty bench, you got off and focused a bit too much on grabbing your belongings to notice what your surroundings looked like. 

It wasn’t until you had sat down and ripped the bag of food open, when the smell of a salami and mozzarella sub wafted in the air, perking you up and prompting you to smile softly, that you glanced up. Over the dark green shrubs and still water of Peoria Lake were cotton candy clouds, nearly identical to the ones that you had seen while sitting on the hood of your car, terrified and hoping for a sign, any sign, that what you were doing was the right thing. 

Five minutes later, your car was back on the highway and speeding towards Chicago.

You stayed over at your parents’ house that night. They were overjoyed to see their child. Your mother cried, holding onto you as your father rubbed your back, comfortingly. Part of you wanted to, so badly, melt into their arms, but another part of you reminded you of the last time you were here. Despite the furniture being different and the decorations being rearranged, your body twitched as it remembered the exact emotions and position you were in when you got the news. 

The news that your boyfriend, Michael Berzatto, was found dead.

You couldn’t sleep that night, nor the next, or even the one after that. You got a combined total of about 15 hours of sleep in the past 72 hours, making you look and feel exhausted. But your mind was the only thing that wasn’t exhausted from replaying the memory over and over and over. 

About 5 days after you arrived, you got another message from Sugar. This time, a pit formed in your stomach as you read it.

‘Hey, it’s me again! Can you swing by The Beef tomorrow? I'm working there now and would love to see you. I’m sorry this is on such short notice but I've been crazy busy and I heard you were in town. I really want to see you and if you can’t do tomorrow, let me know so we can plan another day.

We really do miss you.’

You rock your jaw and put your phone down on the edge of the twin mattress you sat on, in your childhood bedroom. Right then, your mom gently knocks on your bedroom door before pushing it open.

“Have you talked to Natalie at all yet?” she said softly, clasping her hands together and leaning against the door frame.

You huffed and smiled weakly, of course your mom would mention something to her, that’s how she knew you were here. While your mom respected you doing things on your own time, she also knew that you needed a little push to make that connection. 

“Uhm… yea she just texted me. I uh, i might see her tomorrow at The Beef,” you murmured with a shaky breath. 

Thank god Sugar ended up being the one to text you instead of you texting her. 

Your mom smiled sweetly, “I think you should go, sweetheart. I know it seems scary but… I think it’s time you saw them…” 

Nodding, you turn and crawl up to the pillows of your bed. With a sigh, you lay down and close your eyes, exhausted. 

From your door frame, your mom quietly watched you and sighs softly. She slowly grabs your door and closes it behind her as she leaves. The hallway light goes off, leaving you and your thoughts alone in the pitch black dark.  

And here you were, a couple hours after you read her message, standing across The Beef on a cool Chicago night with the air nipping at your exposed skin as it blows by. You left in such a rush that you forgot to bring a hoodie and didn’t even bother to change from your thin pajama pants and loose old t-shirt. All you did was throw on your shoes and climb out your window, car keys clutched in your sweaty palm, like you used to do in high school to sneak off with Mikey. 

But those days seemed so far away now the same way that The Beef seemed so far away. It felt as if the trek across the street actually spanned thousands of miles and not a minute walk. 

So you sighed and turned around, walking down the sidewalk and back to your car. Who knew what time it was anymore, but you knew that you really needed to get rest tonight… you had a big day tomorrow. 

[citrusses]

January: 2023 Wrapped 🎁🍊

*some* of my favorite 2023 fics, by month they were published (or started to publish, or finished publishing, it's arbitrary bc i make the rules), plus some thoughts on what made these fics so special.

January | February | March | April, May, June | July | August | September | October | November | December

Chicken Shop Date by @sorrybutblog (T, 2K)

Draco and Harry sit down for an interview. Or is it a date?

This is such a fun premise and the Harry/Draco banter just sizzles. The atmosphere is so rich! 2K words of perfection that pack an outsized punch.

Close Behind by @oflights (M, 134K)

To rescue Draco from the Underworld, Harry has to look forward. Unfortunately, Draco has to look back.

A masterpiece that deconstructs every relationship in the HP universe and then rebuilds it, that does mind-boggling things with narrative structure, that stressed me out so badly I felt physically ill, that was so moving it left me bursting into tears for days after I read it, that had the funniest single line I've read in a fic maybe ever. So far reading this is the only time I've ever checked the tags on a fic for "happy ending" because I was so emotionally overwhelmed by it that I needed to know it would be ok in the end. I can't overstate how much I love this one.

For Lack of Wanting by @fluxweeed (E, 8K)

Over the last ten years, I’ve worked hard to become a better person. I hate being reminded of who I used to be. But Harry likes it when I’m mean.

A gorgeous, painful story that explores a kind of Harry/Draco dynamic that's not seen as often in fics (a SAD one), but is done exceptionally well here. It hurts so good!

Nights With You by @the-sinking-ship (E, 58K)

Draco is mortified when moments prior to departing for the most anticipated destination wedding of the year, he is cruelly dumped. But when he learns that Harry Potter has, at long last, split with his horrible boyfriend, Draco is certain his luck has changed. Never a man to squander an opportunity for revenge (and what would probably be a spectacular shag), Draco vows to make Potter his for the weekend. Now all Draco has to do is convince him.

@the-sinking-ship regularly writes: my favorite kind of Draco, my favorite kind of romance/getting together AND my favorite kind of smut. This fic is all of those things.

Polar Night/Midnight Sun by toomuchplor (E, 54K)

Harry travels to arctic Norway on the trail of dragon egg poachers, only to find he's been assigned to work alongside the only NorMagPol Auror north of sixty: one Draco Malfoy. It's been ten years since they crossed paths, and Malfoy isn't exactly what Harry expected or remembered. For one thing, he wears a lot more hand-knits? When a sudden winter storm strands the pair, unable to use magic to rescue themselves, they take shelter in a one-room Norwegian hytte.

The hottest fic in the coldest setting, this one made me absolutely FERAL. The most evocative scenery, incredible characterization, and the perfect pacing building to an explosively sexy and tender relationship. Also I would read like, 100K more words on just the mittens and jumpers and scarves of this fic, which are not items of clothing I have cared much about in the past. It's just that every detail, down to the smallest, is incredible!

When It Returns by @academicdisasterfic (M, 8K)

‘You’re late, layabout,’ Malfoy drawled, pushing the whiskey over to him. ‘I’ll have you know that I am very busy maintaining a whole house and garden by myself now.’ ‘Oooh, the dead husband card. Before any alcohol. Is that a record?’ Harry's husband is dead, and Malfoy is the only one who gets it. Or, the one where they drink at a straight man pub, renovate a house, and learn how to find joy again.

January was a good month for feeling bad. It's another angsty one! This one is full of beautiful healing in the face of a loss that feels very real, Draco annoying Harry out of his grief spiral (but in a loving way?) and Harry being on the right side of almost too stubborn for it to work. I have read and reread this many times already!

[csbenthusiast]

May your heart never stop beating for me - Choi Yeonjun X f!reader

a/n: *ahem* hi😭 it’s been a long looong while since I last wrote something and posted in here(my apologies), but ummmm this is a comeback ? sort of? idk, but what I know is that this was sitting on my docs app FOR SO SO LONG LIKE SINCE FEBRUARY and it was supposed to be out on Halloween and then on Christmas but I got sick😬 anyways consider this a miracle and a late gift 😀 (I’m also planning a Soob fic that was supposed to be out on his birthday but shhhhhlets not talk about it for now).

a/n²: y’all I lied😨 I’m late once again, but what matters is that it’s finally here!! Literally a year later 😀 and ummm I tried to mix two ways of writing this, so I hope it was not confusing!

Genre: angst? it’s bittersweet.

CW: toxic relationship (nothing to worry about, YJ and mc just go back and forth), language, Yeonjun has a bad behavior(I’m not sorry, I was feeling very angsty), implied suggestive touches? they both need each other in a not so healthy way. Lemme know if I missed something!

WC: 2.2k

disclaimer: this only fiction and does not represent this idol in any way.

Pls enjoy and give me feedbacks:DDD they make me very happy (English is not my first language, excuse any mistakes 😙)

Songs I listened while writing this: here

The weather outside was definitely a mood killer. As the days passed by, October just got colder and colder. And it’s not like the chilly weather wasn’t nice, in fact, it was actually quite pleasant.

The season was nice, sure. But spending the days alone was not on your ‘to do’ list, to be honest.

Yeonjun left without even explaining himself once again. Everyday life seemed meaningless and the urge to check up on him was growing more and more.

It was worthless, though. Why bother yourself when he has never put you on the top of his priority list? Was it too much to ask?

Despite that, here you were, almost 10pm on a Tuesday trying to cheer up your mood with a random movie playing on the TV.

It was a terrible film, though. The best option was probably going to sleep, but you knew better; going to bed meant reminiscing everything until the first ray of sunshine was peeking through the curtains.

In the end, you tried to go through that mess.

And, somehow, that thing was able to get your attention to the point where you ended up startled by the sound of the doorbell.

You tried to ignore it at first, too scared to check who it was, but it rang again. Was it a murder? No, no murder would ring the doorbell before making a victim.

In defeat, and dragging your feet to where the door was, you took a look through the peephole and, right now, the person outside was probably worse than a murder.

Yeonjun couldn’t be on the other side in the middle of the night, right? It was like he read your mind.

You twisted the keys in a hurried move, though. Being curious sometimes was a curse.

“Hey.” It’s the only thing he bothered to say, looking at his feet like he was ashamed. As if.

“What are you doing here?” You hissed, not really sure of how you were supposed to feel. It’s kind of bittersweet.

He was still looking at the ground, but you took notice of how Yeonjun was shivering. Was it due to the cold and the lack of clothes? You’re not sure.

“I…” a sigh escaped his chapped “I don’t know, all the roads lead me here at the end of the day, I suppose.” It was an attempt to cheer up the mood, but by the look on your face he quickly replaced his smile with a frown.

Two pairs of eyes bored into each other, and it was clear that you were anything but pleased to see him standing by your doorstep. But, again, being good could be a curse, perhaps.

It was cold outside, and Yeonjun was shivering. Maybe you should invite him inside. Unfortunately, you did.

Huening Kai will have to deal with this later, I guess.

"Come on, you're clearly cold." You stepped aside, making room for him. "I can make some tea if you'd like. What do you say?"

"That's what I like about you, Y/N." Yeonjun winked "You're always looking out for me." and made himself comfortable on her couch.

"Do you deserve it, though?" the girl mumbled, occupying herself in the kitchen.

Meanwhile, the older boy was looking around the room and hallway. A few things changed; the picture you two took back in July was no longer hanging on the wall and a few decorations were out of place. Odd.

"Hey, Y/N?" he called, receiving back a hum. "Where's our photo? You know, the one you're kissing my cheek."

The nerve. Where does he think it went?

"What do you mean 'Where's our photo'?" She scoffed, dropping a few things while doing so. "I put it in a box, of course" and mumbled loud enough for Yeonjun to hear.

The boy frowned as if she said the most horrible thing in the world. How could she put it in a box? Does that mean their relationship meant nothing to her?

"I can see the gears turning inside your head." Y/N said from behind, which scared him a little. Did you have a sixth sense or something? "Don't think too much about it… or do, it's up to you since I don't have a say in any of our conversations anyways."

Now, that definitely bruised his ego. Why were you being so passive aggressive all of sudden?

"What's wrong?" He asked, sitting by the couch once again.

Is he playing dumb? Or is he just trying to get under my skin?

Y/N bitterly chuckled. You surely could've ignored him when he knocked on your fucking door a few minutes ago, but you didn't and now you had to deal with his stupid behavior.

No, wait. Why were you complaining, though? You were the one who agreed to play his little games, right? Little games? Is that what this is?

"Hey, Y/N, look at me, will you?" Ah, it took him long enough. He used that sweet tone; he always did. Maybe that's his curse, being awfully sweet yet such a jerk sometimes. "What's wrong? Now I'm the one who's able to see the gears in your head." He chuckled and grabbed her hands, gesturing for Y/N to sit beside him.

His touch sent shivers down her spine, but it’s not like she would admit it. And Yeonjun must’ve noticed that, because he took this opportunity to bring Y/N closer to his body with a hug.

That touch was supposed to be an act of comfort, but it only made her feel more anxious than when she saw his face earlier that night. However, it was impossible to ignore his scent; y/n’s senses were drowning with every touch and breath lingering on her skin. Yeonjun was sneaky, he moved his hand off her arms and stroked her back, and, maybe, just maybe, y/n’s heart started to beat a little bit faster and louder.

Perhaps that’s your curse. Yeonjun always found a way to drive you insane, and you always tried to push his buttons. But by the end of the day, you two would always get back together. Saying that it would be the last time you’d hurt each other was pointless, because it was not the truth.

Despite everything, y/n wanted to be mad, sad and let everything out. But she couldn’t, her mind was a complete mess with every brush of his fingers on her skin.

“Hey, you seem off.” Yeonjun brought her face closer to his by holding her chin.

“Am I now?” Y/N flinched at his touch, face burning with the proximity. Your body betraying your emotions made him smirk.

Yeonjun’s breath was against her neck, with lips slightly brushing over her ear.

“Yes, you are.” He whispered. “Kitten, talk to me. Why are your walls suddenly up, hm?” And planted a kiss by her pulse point.

This situation was uncomfortable, to say the least. But it’s not like you wanted him to stop.

Really? He should stop. You had to stop it.

“I hate you…” y/n’s breath hitched. She pushed him away, but that was not enough. He frowned and tried to get closer to you at all costs. “I hate you for lying to me. And…and for running away when you sensed something was wrong. You always do that and then come back here to say it’s the last time, but let’s be honest, we both know it’s not the last time and…”

Yeonjun kept quiet the whole time. He knew you were right, it was a very good point, but he wouldn’t admit it. As always, he tried to stand up for himself.

“Come on, Y/N, that’s not true. We both know that.” his thumb grazed the line of her upper lip and her whole body tingled at the touch.

You were better than that, of course. Your hands wrapping around his wrists to push him away were enough of a sign to startle him.

“You’re making me look like some fucking crazy ex-boyfriend.” His words were sharp; sharp enough to make Y/N chuckle and cry at the same time.

Maybe that's what he is. Ex-boyfriend. The words matched his actions, but why hearing or even saying it out loud left a bitter taste in your mouth?

“Maybe that’s what you are.” hurt was evident in her voice. “You run away, fuck some other girl and then come back to me expecting everything will be alright? I’m tired, Yeonjun. And I’d appreciate it if you could just…leave me alone.”

He went silent. The room grew silent once again, and the only sound that dared break the silence was the soft thuds of his heart. His breath hitched, but he put on an act with a scoff, trying his best to look unfazed.

What else was he expecting? She was right, he messed up one too many times. Even when they did reconcile, it never lasted long.

After a few minutes of thinking, and an endless amount of silence, he looked at her with a sly smile curling his lips.

“Kitten, has anyone made you feel as good as I do? I don’t think so…” his lips widened even more with every second.

And, maybe, just maybe, he was right, and thinking about it left a bitter taste on your mouth. No one has ever made you feel like he did; does. Did it really matter if he shattered your heart? By the end of the day he would be just Yeonjun, the loving, caring and stupid boy you met through your friends.

Yeonjun could read you like a book, but you never really tried to hide your feelings or reactions either. Just the subtle brush of his fingertips on your arm was enough to get him under your skin again.

It’s all too overwhelming.

“You like this, don’t you?” He whispered. “It’s a cat and mouse game. Excited much?” Yeonjun added.

Oh, yes. This was nothing but a game.

Right before his eyes y/n was clearly aching. But you didn’t have anywhere to hide, did you? You opened the door and let him in.

It’s just you and me now, she thought.

“Who wins in the end?” Y/n looked at him with a bored expression, but in reality everything about her was fragile now.

Despite that, Yeonjun kept a smug look on his face, bringing her close to him. It was obvious what he was thinking.

“I’m not quite sure. Wanna find out?” He licked his lips and kissed her cheek.

His breath was hot on your collar, making you loudly swallow. He moved his mouth from your face to your ear, then jawline and lastly the neck, making you whole body shiver with the contact, a human contact you missed for weeks.

“Why do you treat me like this?” She mumbled, too dizzy with his touches.

“Now, that’s not what I asked, love. Do you want to find out how this game ends?”

A tear dared to almost run down your face. You wouldn’t let Yeonjun do that to you, though.

“M-mouse…” Y/N whispered. “Mouse wins.”

Yeonjun seemed amused by your response, which made his grin widen; you couldn’t properly speak without wanting to break right in front of him.

He pulled away from you, going back on his feet.

Is he going away again? You thought right before he offered his hands for you to take. And so you did, just like you did a few months ago.

Surprisingly, the palm of his hands were really warm and welcoming. Who would’ve thought, right?

“You’re so pretty, princess…” Yeonjun smoothed your hair and dragged his thumb across your lips.

Pretty? It’s more like ‘weak’.

He was asking for something, that was a fact even if unspoken. You couldn’t blame him, could you? He was just this good at turning the tables, so good to the point he would make you feel weak and break for him.

“You’re not supposed to be here…” That was everything y/n was able to reply. She was confused, frustrated. Why was he doing all of this? To torture you?

But it felt good, though; having him there in the middle of the living room under the dim lights of the apartment. You didn’t want to be alone, it was not a good option.

However, it was impossible to ignore the tension growing in the air.

Before she could think some more, Yeonjun stumbled with her into the kitchen, being quick to press a soft kiss on her lips and placing her on top of the counter.

It was a short touch of lips, but enough to make y/n sparkle inside and also shake with anxiety. He did know how to be convincing.

“This is the last time I tell you’ve got it wrong…the last time I’ll run away.” He mumbled, chin resting on her shoulder while she caressed his covered back.

“Only if you promise me your heart won’t ever stop beating for me.”

He nodded, a silent agreement.

Was it really?

“I promise.” Yeonjun smirked, holding y/n on his arms and dragging her down the hallway straight to her room.

Heh happy Valentine’s Day y’all

[harlowhockeystick]

ok anyway here’s my mean!nate request. sorry i can only pick angsty things for him even tho i love him. "you're the worst" <3333 do as you will tehe

february prompts | mean!nate mackinnon x reader | angst, mentions of ab*se, nate making excuses

this one is a shorty, kinda forgot how to write for him tbh...

"nathan why are you here if you're just going to degrade me?!" nate rolled his eyes, standing up off your couch and walked into your kitchen.

it's moments like this where you're not sure why you still let him in. you've never been official, you've never put a label on exactly what you are with nate. but if someone were to look at both of your instagram pages, if they asked your friend groups, it would sound like they're dating and the can't seem to get enough of each other. but in reality? nate hasn't ever taken you on an official date.

he opens your fridge and pulls out a water, some things to make himself a sandwich. this was a normal routine, he would do something to piss you off, you would call him out, he would separate the two of you for a little bit and it would be fine until he said something else again.

but by now, you were fed up. you'd had a stressful week and you wanted your place to yourself for the night. you didn't want him to intrude your space like this.

"no nate," you walk into the kitchen and close the fridge door on him. "i want you to leave, i want to be by myself for a little bit." he scoffed, looking up at you. at least he had the decency to put things back from where he got them.

he grabbed his keys and wallet, walking toward the door, "you're the worst," he mumbled. always has to get the last fucking word in.

"i'm the worst, nathan?" you walked toward him and he just pressed his head against the wooden door, "really? i'm not the abusive one here."

"abuse? fuck you mean, abuse?"

"you constantly degrade me, you're always calling me stupid, bitch, you have me in such a headlock nathan!" he turns around and looks at you like you're dumb. he looks at you as if you truly were the things he called you.

"c'mon you know it's just the way i talk, you know it's just what i'm used to-"

"no! stop making excuses, i...i thought you loved me. you can't keep yelling at me, pushing me around, then using me in bed to make me get over it nathan."

he presses his hand against the wall and rolls his head back, "stop calling me nathan, you know i don't like it when you call me that."

"then stop treating me like i'm your bitch. get out of my house."

[not-alien-girl-v]

hey babes!! ur works is just 🤤. george is so hot could you please write a valentines day thing with him 🙏

warning: language, TW matty healy

note: they/them pronouns for Y/N and this is almost angsty but still fluffy also Matty is like bitchy but is still Y/N’s bestie idk they’re frenemies cuz that happened in a dream once. might continue writing more george stuff cuz i rly like it.

Complete silence is swallowing them whole, alongside a few other sounds keeping them company in the early hours of the morning.

There is an open window somewhere on the spacious tour bus, and the winged creatures singing in the outside world inform Y/N that the daylight has come to greet them all once again this morning. Though they wish the birds would just shut the fuck up, honestly.

They are loud, cawing and chirping and essentially screaming as if it isn't 7 am in the fucking morning and Y/N doesn't have a pounding headache. Last night was a bit wild for the gang, once the post-show drinks started making their way through the already mildly intoxicated band members, it was clear that none would have any memory of the rest of the evening.

And despite all the drunken tomfoolery, Y/N had not consumed a single ounce of alcohol. Not a drop. Yet their head throbbed as if they had. Being the designated driver, the designated sober friend takes it's toll on a person, especially when your entire group is filled with professional dumbasses, it's like they've been trained in all the ways to be annoying while drunk. Having to deal with all of them until 3 in the morning mixed with the lack of sleep and water Y/N is currently experiencing make the perfect recipe for a vile headache.

George had no problem with sleep last night, fortunate for him. He got the most shitfaced, and coincidentally, was the most irritating amongst the hoard of drunks, with his need to cling to Y/N like a lost puppy, stroking their hair, placing sloppy wet kisses all over their face when all Y/N wanted was to get them all safely in the car. At least as a drunk, George was clingy and lovey rather than mean and aggressive.

They had no idea what happened to the rest of the boys once they all retired for the night, as once Y/N succeeded in getting everyone safely in the bus, they allowed them all to fuck off for the night, with the exception of George who would not settle down enough to go to bed unless Y/N committed to a 5 minute cuddle in his bunk. Soon enough, a 5 minute cuddle turned to 10 minutes, which turned to an hour, and Y/N fell asleep before they could continue counting the hours G’s arm wrapped tightly over them prevented their escape.

So here they are, same position they fell asleep in with George's arm securing them to the bunk like they might slip away at any moment. They keep their gaze on him, his hair sticking flat to his forehead from hours of being pressed into a pillow. They consider reaching out, tenderly brushing some away from his sleeping face but decide not to, not wanting to disturb his peaceful slumber.

With a sigh, they pull out their phone, and like they suspected, it's 7:18 am, February 14. February 14... shit. It's Valentine's day. It's Valentine's day and George probably has something super fucking romantic planned as a surprise and Y/N has nothing. They gently peel his arm off of their middle and slip out of the bunk.

With the stress of the situation, they decide to trifle through G's jacket pockets, hoping to find his pack of cigs Y/N has come to know that he always keeps with him. When they're met with an empty container, a plan devises in their head.

Cigarette's can be a great gift, right? They're quick to find their shoes and lace them up, putting on George's jacket as an afterthought to conceal them from the frigid San Francisco morning air, seeing as it's still winter.

Before their hand touches the door, however, a voice speaks up from a figure on the couch that somehow Y/N hadn't noticed in their hurry.

"Where are you off to?" It's Matty, of course it is, because Y/N can't do anything without the mild tease and torment from that man.

"Drugstore."

"I'll tag along."

"I didn't ask you to."

"You don't have to. 'S the beauty of friendship, isn't it?"

A tired scowl appears on their face but Matty is already behind them, so fortunately, he misses it.

In their stress, Y/N kept quiet during the walk, resulting in a lack of snide commentary from Matty which they were secretly very grateful for, though they’d never admit it out loud.

They walk side by side into the automatic sliding doors of the drugstore and the immediate warmth of the interior of the building grasps their features. They make a beeline for the candy aisle, and an intrigued Matty follows closely behind.

“Oh fuck, it’s Valentine’s Day, isn’t it?” Matty comments like it was a necessary observation, not a glaringly obvious and rather stupid and oblivious thing to say at such a moment. Maybe Y/N needed breakfast, hanger is not a good look on them.

They hum in response. “He’s been talking about his plans for months. He even- actually, I shouldn’t be telling you. Surprise, or something like that. But it’s romantic as shit.” Matty paces the aisle, not paying attention to the icky stress sweat appearing on the other person occupying the aisle. Does this guy not know how to shut his mouth?

“He’ll like this, right?” Their hand grabs a heart shaped box of chocolates, assorted flavors. Matty gives them a look. “What? What’s with that face?”

“What face? This is just my face, can’t blame me for having a face.”

“No, you were making a face at me. What is it? Will he not like it?”

Matty’s eyebrows raise childishly and Y/N wishes they could slap them clean off, watch them inch away like lowly caterpillars on the ground below.

“It’s just, I don’t know, he’s more of a fruity candy kind of guy. Doesn’t fancy chocolate all that much,” they could see in his eyes he strained so hard to refrain from making a pun about his own song, but by some power above, he didn’t.

“Okay, okay. I’ll do… some Red Vines. He likes those, right?” Grabbing a pack of red candy, it is waved in front of Matty’s face.

“Do you even need to ask me that?”

“I don’t even know why he loves these things so much. This is like old person candy. He’s only twenty…” They trail off.

“Three?”

“Right, twenty-three. I knew that.” Y/N makes their exit from the candy aisle, grabbing a few cans of tea from the drink section.

“You should get a snack for yourself. You seem a little out of it this morning.”

“Only because you and your bitchass friends got drunk as skunks last night and I had to round you all up,” they huff and turn to face him, meeting his now rolling eyes.

“Fine. I’ll pay for your snack. Will that fix this?”

“Certainly won’t hurt!” They smile and pace to the front of the store, hoping they don’t forget the cigarettes, the sole purpose they went to the store for. That would be just like them, forgetting like that.

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

The click of an opening tour bus door alerts George, who was scrolling through his phone on the couch. He woke up easily, however, wondering where his lover had gone so early. He sleeps like the dead, so whenever they slip out during the rare nights they get to sleep in the same bed, he hardly is disturbed by it in his peaceful slumber.

Sometimes he swears they always leave his bed before he wakes up to avoid his compressing cuddles in the morning. He can’t help it, he’s a sucker for being all over the ones he loves.

Matty is the first to walk in, and George almost goes back to looking at his phone in sheer disappointment until Y/N walks in. Suddenly, a lazy smile makes itself known on his sleepy face and his mood is elevated.

“Hey darling, where were you?” He queries as Matty busies himself with a laptop at the back of the bus.

His voice is extra deep in the morning, it’s always deep, but something about hearing it in the morning is something so personal and special to them. It’s like a promise to more days like this, spent in the knowledge of their lover, the knowledge that George exists and is in love with them.

“Stopped by the store for some things,” they plop down onto the cushion next to the one George is taking residency on, placing the plastic bag between them to dig through it.

“Is that my jacket?”

“You want it back?”

He grins, trying not to show how lovestruck he is and seriously failing. “No, no, keep it, if you’re cold. Looks better on you.”

“Oh, you old charmer,” they giggle, chucking the Red Vines into his lap, followed by the cigarettes, then gently placing down the can of tea at his side as to not injure him with the 24 ounces.

“All of this for me?” George places a dramatic hand over his heart while his lover digs into the snack Matty bought for them. “Aren’t I the luckiest girl in the world.”

The two spend a few moments in a famished haze, pile-driving the snacks in their grasps but once he slows down with his red candy, he sneaks a few looks at the person beside them.

The person who, even lost in thought, looked more beautiful than ever, who George had the privilege of sleeping next to when he sweet talked them enough, who George prayed he could sleep next to every night for the rest of his life, if they’d have him.

He tosses the empty bag separating him and his love onto the ground and scoots closer to them. Ignoring the odd stare he is given at the invasion of personal space, he wraps his arms around them and pushes them back into a laying position, propped up by the arm of the couch.

“What are you doing?” They ask with a small smile.

Voice muffled, face buried in their chest, “loving you.”

“You could have just said thank you for the candy. Don’t have to do all this to show your appreciation.”

“Maybe I just enjoying doing this, being close to you. Ever thought about that, numbskull?”

Their hand brushes up and down his built back, slow and gentle, like coaxing a baby to sleep and not a full grown man. “Watch your language, mister.”

He picks his head up to face them, chin resting on their sternum. “Happy Valentine’s Day, my love.”

Trying to make light of the furious blush creeping onto their cheeks, “do you ever keep count of all the names you call me in a day. Like affectionate or not. So far you’ve got ‘darling’ and ‘numbskull’, ‘my love.’”

“Well, somebody’s gotta be the sweet one in this relationship. Most of the time, you act like you don’t even like me.”

“I do not.”

“He’s got a point!” A mumbly British voice from the back of the bus.

“Butt out!” Y/N scolds, turning attention back to the man who’s made his place on top of them, settling enough to rest his full body weight. This is the typical type of cuddle to be expected from George. There’s not many other ways he knows to cuddle.

“I do too like you, what are you talking about?”

“It’s okay, I get it, you show your love and affection in your own special way, and I love that about you, but I’ve gotta say, sometimes people who don’t know us think we’re just friends.”

“Look, it’s not like I can be all over you all the time, it’s impractical.”

“I know, love, that’s why I use pet names, it’s the easiest way I know to show my love for you. Especially since you won’t let me buy you things even though I constantly offer.”

“Ok, I’ll let you buy me things.”

“That’s not the point, baby. The point is, I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Their words seem to turn him to absolute mush. It’s something Y/N has always had a hard time speaking out loud to him, every time the three words make it out, they’re incredibly special to George.

“Thanks. For saying that, I mean. Thank you. I mean it.”

“Anytime.”

“Can I add to the relationship contract that you have to say that to me at least once a day? Can I do that?” George seems half joking but they don’t care.

“If that’s what you want, babe.”

“Good. Cuz I do want that. And I’m taking you out to dinner tonight. We leave at 6. Dress nice. And I’m paying, because you said I could.”

They nod their head at his demands, waiting for him to drop his head back onto their chest before circling both arms fully around his back, giving him a tight squeeze before holding him gently.

[dreaminghour]

Another 'reclaim the QuiObi tag' fic for the writing servers event from February. This prompt was given to me by @sanerontheinside and I wrote the following in 24 hours.

This is a WIP. It ends abruptly. I didn't sleep enough last night so I had no energy to finish it before work. It is angsty and I enjoyed the heck out of it and plan to finish it soon.

The prompt was: "When was the last time you ate anything?"

Fandom: Star Wars | Pairing: Qui-Gon/Obi-Wan | Rating: Teen | No Warnings Apply | Words: 1392

lemon moon by cloverpeaches.tumblr.com

"When was the last time you ate anything?"

Obi-Wan moves around the apartment like it is his own because, for a time, it once was. Now however he recognizes that while the plant life has expanded, gloriously succulent and green, there is detritus and dust everywhere.

It isn't messy, really, Qui-Gon doesn't own enough for a mess.

Obi-Wan has come to visit his mentor and friend because it has been three months since they saw one another. Three months of put off meetings and excuses. Obi-Wan has been busy, his training under Qui-Gon made him wholly suited for working with senators and kings in the Republic's restructuring to prevent an ascent like Palatine's from ever happening again.

Or at least for another thousand years.

Qui-Gon is quiet, bathed in muted sunlight like his plants, eyes shut while he sits cross-legged on the floor, hair loose around his shoulders — it looks unkempt though clean.

"I asked, when was the last time you ate something?"

Qui-Gon blinks up at Obi-Wan as though he has only realized his former padawan is there. As though they hadn't greeted one another in that subliminal way, the touch of the Force nudging against them like two cats who are friendly.

He looks thin, much worse than the last time Obi-Wan saw him.

"May I take you out to lunch in the dining hall?"

Qui-Gon shuts his eyes and sighs.

"Perhaps a picnic in the room of a thousand fountains?"

Qui-Gon remains unmoving, the peace which rests over him is tense, somehow.

"Alright, I'm taking you to Dex," Obi-Wan declares and pulls Qui-Gon to his feet.

The further they get from the Temple and the Senate building, the more the demeanor of the crowd changes. The senate pages are transformed into hawkers, the padawans into lawless students. The streets are full of bright droids and raucous songs. It's lively and chaotic, the kind of place Qui-Gon used to thrive in.

Obi-Wan can see in his mind's eye the way Qui-Gon would have turned back to smirk at him, meanwhile making sure he hadn't lost his padawan.

When Obi-Wan glances back, he sees Qui-Gon has his eyes trained on the ground a few feet ahead of him. It's easy to get separated in these crowds, but they both know the way.

Dex's is no longer seating the lunch rush when they walk in, but the smell is still divine, spicy noodles and flatcakes, hot kaf and fizzy-snap. He takes two menus and sits down by the window. Qui-Gon follows but does not look at the menu.

"Already know what you're going to eat?" Obi-Wan asks, but Qui-Gon does not reply.

Despite how often Obi-Wan has come here, he likes the reminder of what's available. When the droid comes to take their order, Obi-Wan gleefully makes use of his mission expense fund to order the works: flatcakes with yogon berry syrup, bacon and eggs, spicy noodles, dumpling soup and a bowl of fruit.

Qui-Gon orders tea.

"One for me as well," Obi-Wan says.

The droid takes his money without remark.

"Did they demolish the Penza Tower?" Qui-Gon asks, peering across the ravine toward the construction going on between warehouses.

"It seems so," Obi-Wan replies, scowling against the sunlight to see what could be going on behind the orange construction fabric. "In the meantime, it's an eyesore."

Qui-Gon makes no reply.

Obi-Wan aches.

Once upon a time, Qui-Gon would have challenged Obi-Wan to see things with nonjudgmental eyes, to reframe the world into neutral terms, to garnish his biased impressions into honest kindness. 'This is how one makes friends with the unfamiliar,' he would say with a twinkle in his eye.

For a second, Obi-Wan has let himself believe that Qui-Gon's interest in the construction site meant he was letting go of some of his guilt, that he was inhabiting the world the way he once used to.

"I heard you requested a transfer to Jedha," Obi-Wan says. It's hard to keep the bitterness from his voice. "The master I once knew would have gone if he felt called to go."

"I am still needed here," Qui-Gon replies, like some sage Jedi. "Thank you," he says to the droid when their tea is delivered. He sighs as he lifts the hot cup to his mouth.

"So you need permission? Is that why you're living like some ascetic?"

Qui-Gon sighs and puts down his cup.

"You're angry with me," Qui-Gon says.

Obi-Wan bristles. "I am not."

"You are." Qui-Gon raises his eyes to meet Obi-Wan's gaze. He looks older in the bright light, his eyes are pale, lined with the shadows of sleepless nights. "I wondered where all your negative emotions had gone after Anakin's death. You seemed so determined to be soft."

That, on the other hand, does make Obi-Wan angry.

"To what purpose would I have loaded you with my pain and sadness when you were already carrying that burden?"

"It is one you relish keeping from me," Qui-Gon says quietly. "To hold it all in is your punishment."

The server droid returned and began off loading plates.

"Forgive me," Obi-Wan says, "but I'm hungry, so I'm going to eat."

He digs in.

For a few moments, Qui-Gon just blows across the surface of his tea and sips. Obi-Wan cuts up the flat cakes and dunks them in the soft eggs, shoveling down food as though he is starving. He had a horrid flight back from Alderaan and wished the food on the shuttle had been better than "nutritious." He's glad that Dex is here, that he can just come and eat his fill.

He wishes Qui-Gon would eat too, however.

As though he hears the thought, Qui-Gon picks up a cube of purple melon and chews it thoughtfully.

"I'm angry with you," Obi-Wan agrees.

Qui-Gon's expression is softly curious.

"I'm angry that you want to leave."

Qui-Gon raises his shoulders, the facsimile of a shrug, it feels like he's giving up. If he's going to Jedha, then he practically has.

"There is very little left here for me," Qui-Gon says, reaching for a small cluster of berries.

Obi-Wan watches him chew on them, only the faintest scowl on his face as the sour taste spreads across his tongue. He worries that what he will say will stop Qui-Gon from eating but he needs to say it.

"Do I matter so little to you?" Obi-Wan asks. "One apprentice falls so you might as well give up on the other one?"

It doesn't land the way Obi-Wan hoped it might. Qui-Gon only hesitates before picking up a slice of bacon.

"You don't need me," he says. "I'm still consulting on the governmental overhaul, I'm still teaching Ataru to the padawans and meditation to the crèchlings. So long as I'm needed, I will stay."

"And what then?" Obi-Wan asks, swallowing hard, appetite gone. "Once the other masters return to their lessons and the government is on its own feet, what then? Will you sit in the desert until you shrivel up and die?"

"Then I will be one with the Force," Qui-Gon replies evenly.

He pulls the half eaten plate of flatcakes toward him and asks, "May I?"

Wordlessly, Obi-Wan nudges the little pitcher of syrup toward Qui-Gon as well. The flatcakes, bacon, and eggs are polished off while Obi-Wan watches.

"It's not about need," Obi-Wan says. "What about wants?"

Qui-Gon leans back in his seat, wiping his mouth, not meeting Obi-Wan's gaze.

"Don't you want to spend time with me?"

He does look up at that however.

"Of course I want to spend time with you," Qui-Gon says, much as he would reassure an aggrieved child who does not yet know that all things end.

"Is that so?" Obi-Wan grips his cup tightly. "You keep dodging me, so I had to assume you did not."

"It's not that—" Qui-Gon begins, just as the droid rolls up to their table again.

"Forgot the soup," they warble, and place a steaming bowl between them.

"What is it then?" Obi-Wan asks, watching the bright red dumplings settle in the milky broth.

"I have made mistakes. They have been laid out for all to see. So I… have been contemplating them."

"What Anakin did is not your fault," Obi-Wan says, leaning in to speak emphatically but quietly.

"Nor is it yours," Qui-Gon replies, raising his eyebrows.

Thank you for reading ♡ fic log → @dreaminghour-archive

[blueberry-pride]

hi hi 👋 can i have headcanons of deuce and his gn!s/o who has feelings for Deuce, but is really hesitant to get into a relationship with him since they're planning to go back home at the end? they don't want to break Deuce's heart and get all of his hopes up. can either be angsty, fluffy, or both! tysm and congrats on 100 followers 🎊🎈

Enchanted To Meet You

Deuce x GN! S/O

warnings: small amount of cursing, angst, grammatical errors

Berry: Sorry for those who have been waiting for these since February! I still hope you enjoy this and thank you for your guys' patience. What helped me write this was listening to Enchanted by Taylor Swift, don't know why but it works *laughs*

In all honesty I could see this situation as a constant back and forth, for you as well as Deuce

"Hey (Y/N) could you help me with this?" He'd ask sheepishly. " I kind of zoned out when professor Crewel was discussing this..." His voice trailed but you couldn't help but form a small smile.

Hanging out with the rest of the first years was fun and all but often times it led to just the two of you talking endlessly about your guys' interests and many other topics. Which in turn amplified the growing feeling in your heart.

But as the two of you started to get closer, it also amplified that one nagging thought in your head

'You still have to go home...'

You would get this random sting in your chest every time you hang out with Deuce especially when the two of you are laughing. Which in turn made your smile falter for a quick sec.

"-And Epel came running forward cuz Ace..." His voice would trail as he would noticed something off with you but continued on thinking that you might just be drained from the day.

Deuce is a smart guy just not academically but almost everyone can agree that he'd take note of people's expression here and there.

His suspicions would only grew as your behavior continued to falter each time he tries to get close to you.

He wouldn't confront you at first, perhaps in fear of being too invasive. no. He'd be more attentive, be more caring towards you in hopes you'd cheer up.

But you already know it does the opposite.

"Hey (Y/N) I remembered you said this was your favorite snack, I got some extra madol so here."

"Hey (Y/N)! all that studying we did at ramshackle helped me a lot, look!" He beamed.

"Feeling sore? lemme take a look." Deuce gently held your wrist and started massaging it. "Feeling better?"

You wanted to smile and enjoy the moment... but the thought of seeing him hold back tears as he'd eventually have to see you walk through the Mirror of Darkness one last time gutted you every time.

'All that effort and you're just gonna leave him?'

'Why take the risk if you'll know it'll just leave you both alone in the end?'

Your overthinking led you to isolate from him, distracting yourself from the pain instead of facing it head on out of fear that it would ruin that joyous smile of his. But of course, Deuce's confusion was stirring him like crazy for days on end to the point Ace had to butt in

"Dude... if you're that frustrated with (Y/N), go ask them!" Ace groaned. " You've been looking constipated about it for the whole day. If you think something's wrong, go do it before some classmate gets the wrong impression of your face."

Ace was actually worried about the two of you so

"It's nothing to be concerned about Deuce!" You yelled out.

"nothing to be concerned about??" Deuce snapped. "(Y/N) You still continued to help despite me asking you about the same goddamn question cuz I couldn't get it through my thick head."

"YOU helped me out when picking gifts when I wanted to send some back home. " And you always do this thing where'd you glance at me whenever Ace jokes about my shitty past. Do you have any idea what that does to me?"

"Of course I'd be concerned about the person that stuck by me, when they well...aren't there by my side anymore.

If tears weren't already there, there is now

Deuce would still hate himself for making you cry in that moment as he'd try to comfort you.

In that moment in between your sniffled cries, you explained yourself all the while Deuce held you tighter.

"Why not...take the leap?" He interjected. You looked at him confused. "I mean, gotta live with no regrets and all" He chuckled. "Even if...you still wanna go back home, of course I'll be sad but at least it happened-we happened y'know?"

"You'd be okay with that?" You look up at his teal eyes, the look of determination that made you fall for him in the first place.

Once the relationship is established, I could wholeheartedly see it as a bright one. Sure, there would be times where you or even Deuce himself would breakdown knowing what comes out at the end but there's always reassurance even some butting in from friends Ace.

Deuce would still have that small ounce of hope that you'd stay but he'll respect your decision no matter what.

[hardly-an-escape]

20 questions for fic writers!

thanks for the tag @signiorbenedickofpadua! gonna put this under a cut since it's a little long :)

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

22.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

Just under 77,500.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Right now, just Sandman – but I do have an unfinished MCU story that I'd like to get back to, and there are definitely other fandoms I'd like to play around in at some point. I'm pretty unfocused, it just depends on whatever tickles my fancy.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Kind of Blue, a kind of fire (443) In the February Sun (437) let your heart be light (381) Headache (356) First Time (322)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to respond to every comment! (Although I'm super behind right now. Sometime soon I'll have a nice long self-indulgent afternoon of re-reading comments and finally responding.) I like to respond mostly because, as someone who reads a lot of fic, I get really excited when an author responds to my comments, and I want people who read my work and take the time to leave a comment to have the same feeling :) Also, I just feel like it's polite to say thank you when people say nice things!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I... don't really write angst. Like, at all. I am all about fluff and disgustingly happy endings. I have a WIP that has a fairly angsty beginning/middle (the shellshocked WWI veterans one which I swear to God I will finish), but even that will still have a happy ending (maybe a little bittersweet, but not angsty).

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Ummm all of them?? Like I am genuinely not sure that one rises above the others in terms of its happiness.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I never have! I'm grateful to be active in a fandom that is almost universally kind and supportive! Also I don't really write the kinds of pairings or subjects that might draw the ire of the general public, tbh, so that's probably part of it.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do! At the moment mostly M/M since I'm still very Dreamling obsessed, but also F/M. I don't generally get too kinky or monsterfuckery with it, though. Pretty much just regular-degular sexy times around here.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Not really! Nothing against them, just haven't gotten a spark from that kind of idea. Wait, I take that back. A while back I started a Clintasha fic set in the Station Eleven universe. I never finished it, because I feel like I need to re-read the book in order to do so, and I haven't done that yet. But I'd definitely like to.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope. I would love it if that happens someday! I've considered translating my own fic (I speak fluent German, so it's not outside the realm of possibility), but I'm not sure I'm up to that kind of project at the moment.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, I've had some fun brainstorming sessions and just back-and-forth reblogging with mutuals and trading ideas, but never actual co-writing. I'm open to the idea, but I would hesitate to inflict my writing process on anyone because it is extremely slow and piecemeal. I feel like a lot of co-writing relationships these days are developed on Discord, and try as I might I just cannot become an active Discord user.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Oh, lordy. Genuinely not sure how to answer this. If you go back to like... my very first childhood OTP, it'd have to be something like Han/Leia. But I've never been active in online SW fandom and never written that ship. I mean, Dreamling is obviously a contender. I do also love Stucky and Clintasha, although I'm not really into the MCU these days. I've recently been jumping on the Steddie train, but it remains to be seen if that will last or not. Going back a little farther, I'll never not be a Spuffy shipper. And I'll admit to Nine/Rose and Ten/Rose, and (wince) some JohnLock tendencies. But I really don't think I can point to a single all-time fave!

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I don't think I have anything that's published (or at least begun publicly) that won't ever be finished – hope springs eternal – but I certainly have things I've started and abandoned in my personal WIP files. I've got several Dreamling-related bits and bobs that may or may not ever come to something, and maybe 2300 words of a Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries fic that will probably never see the light of day.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I have a good ear for dialogue, and I'd like to think I come up with some nice metaphors/similes and descriptive language.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Actually writing lmao. No seriously though, just sitting down and getting a first draft done is the most challenging part of the whole deal for me.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I think it's fine and can add some interesting color! Just make sure there's a way for people who don't speak the language (or who are using a screen reader) to understand what's being said.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

First I ever wrote was Star Wars Expanded Universe (now Star Wars Legends) fic in elementary school. First I posted on AO3 was a Lizzie Bennet Diaries 5+1 – which, looking at it for the first time in many years, is actually pretty okay! I did something kind of interesting with the form, I think. I think I must have had a fanfiction.com account at some point but I truly cannot remember if I ever posted anything there... I can't remember my username and I don't even think I have access to the email I used to sign up with.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Among the Stars We are Reborn, for sure. I'm really proud of what I accomplished with that story, and to be honest I wish it had gotten as much attention as some of my other fics.

this was fun, thank you! I know this tag game has been going around and I'm not sure who's done it already and who hasn't, but I'll tag @valeriianz @landwriter @teejaystumbles @tryan-a-bex @cuubism and @tj-dragonblade (and as always, no pressure, just for fun!)

[gangplanksorenji]

12/12 = 1

(Was supposed to be on February 1st, but, it's alright waha)

"Heck yeah, I love fractions" - Me be like:

Hello Orenjideul! It's my 1st anniversary as a writer! It has been a very delightful year for me and sincere thank you all for that! From the pleasing comments, reblogs, likes and support from my fluffy and angsty fics, I thank y'all! Hoping for another interesting year for writing ahead!

Also, I'll be sharing the possible plans I have for this writerversary month so let's go!

---

---

Maybe I'll write for more idols from different girl groups and it's mostly maybe oneshots are more.

My time to write is really scuffed and so is my writer juice but I'll do my best to put out something in the table as long as I can.

Maybe will be more active and maybe do AMA's in the near future if I really feel so.

May or may not continue my series as my juice to wrote for those series are actually fading. Sorry for those drafts that are dusting xD

Maybe doing some connecting fics with my past fics or something idk ehehe.

And for the last one...

I may consider writing another genre in the future. iykyk smirks ;)

---

Maybe some quick statistics from the past year!

I had released 22 fics!

I posted 434 times!

I currently have 1,159 followers!

I currently liked 2,674 posts!

---

Not really much a lot of things to put out here and I appreciate y'all supports! From the followage from my first days as a writer until now, thank you all so much! I really appreciate it and I hope y'all have great day ahead!! Adios <3

---

-🍊

[reggieblk]

20 questions for fic writers

thank you sm for the tag, @liquidluckandstuff !! <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Currently 4, though there should be another arriving before the end of the year

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

278,494 but with me being the kind of person to not post WIPs, that number is not representative of how many words I've actually written.

I just checked all my docs, and my unpublished WIPs come out to 460 393 words so far (across 4 different long fics and 3 oneshots).

So my actual word count is 738 887. what the fuck. i started writing this year btw (in february i think) so this is probably a sign of something worrying lol

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Harry Potter

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

I only have 4 fics posted but the order is : equals in life, let the light in, love is such a dreadful thing (and dread is so lovely), and to hold your life in my decaying hands

5. Do you respond to comments? Why? Why not?

Yes! I just enjoy interacting with people who took the time to read, enjoy, and comment on my fics. People are generally very nice to me too, so it's always a pleasure to chat.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't really do angsty endings lol. I suppose I have to say equals in life bc it's bittersweet? but it's not angsty imo

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

We're gonna have to stray into WIP territory here, but I'm going to have to say If we were lovers; the ending is very sweet

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I have not, no, which I am super grateful for lol. I have gotten annoyingly critical comments though

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes! I'm confused about the second part of the question, what kind? Idk man they bone, what more can I say? But I do write explicit smut scenes bc they're fun

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I have not!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge :)

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! I've had a few people inquire about translating equals in life and they're always so so lovely and respectful! Thank you to all translators out there!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have not, no.

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

If you asked me this last year I would've said Drarry, and my answer would have been the same over the last ten years. However, I have come to favour Tomarry & Harrymort, I sway more closely to Harrymort between the two but not enough for me to give a definitive answer.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Er, I didn't count this one in my answer to the word count question but I have a tiny bit of it written. It would've been an eighth year Drarry fic where Harry's struggling through the aftermath of losing Voldemort's soul -- it would've been the most Harrymort coded Drarry fic lmao. But I don't think I'll ever finish it, simply bc my other WIPs are a lot more interesting.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I would say dialogue, and I'm quite good at what I call recall, I rarely forget details about my fics so I like sprinkling in recalls to lots of little details previously mentioned, sometimes so small the reader wouldn't be able to pick them up I think.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Action scenes are the bane of my existence. I'm just Not Good at them. The writing doesn't flow, the scene is badly set up, they're just not my thing. I actually have a WIP I started in the hopes of getting better at action scenes haha.

I'm not that good at describing people. With it being fanfiction I just assume people know what they look like, but even if they do, physical descriptions add so much to the fic, and I should do them more often.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I'm guilty of this lol. I like doing it in french bc it's fun, but for another fic I had to sprinkle in some italian (i don't speak italian) and it's just stressful (thankfully my beta does understand italian so they helped me). I try not to do it in languages I don't speak.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I'm going to say Harry Potter, but I'm not going to check that. I know that when I was younger I wrote quite a bit of fanfic I kept to myself, and I'm fairly certain the first was Harry Potter. But I also know I wrote some other stuff that I will not be disclosing lol

20. Favourite fics you’ve written?

I have to say it, equals in life (partners in death)

But, I'm very fond of this oneshot I wrote: to hold your life in my decaying hands

And my favourite long fic I've written is If we were lovers, which will hopefully be out before the end of the year.

Tagging: @auphaniim @thequietsoliloquy @tommarvoloriddlesdiary & @pinktom (pretty sure some of you have already been tagged, sorry) no pressure ofc!! x

[little-peril-stories]

Camp Nano July 2023

How It Went

Um, not how I expected.

The good:

I managed to write every day. I'll confess here that, because we went on vacation and were all over the place most days, I sometimes updated my word count for the day, wrote more, and saved that 'update' for the next day because I like getting the badges. (All the writing was done in July though! I did all the outlining and planning work between February and June, but I didn't start writing till July 1.)

My outline was helpful. I didn't spend a lot of time agonizing over "what happens next" because I always knew, even if the specifics were a little fuzzy. My process boils down to 'plan hard, but allow for deviation & exploration' and it seems like that is still a system that works for me.

Some of the writing was OK. I mean, it's a writing challenge and I was going fast. She gonna need work. But I often smiled while I was writing, or when I was rereading scenes, and that's a good indicator for me. :)

The , uh, well, you see:

I wasn't always feeling it. Trying to track exactly why I felt this way has been tough. I'm willing to admit it could have been burnout (or something adjacent to it) since Camp Nano began right on the heels of the end of the school year, and I had just finished the whirlwind of writing The Queen of Lies in a month, a Thing That Happened that we may never understand. Maybe I started planning too early and the passion had faded since the height of my enthusiasm as I plotted it out. Idk. Maybe it was being on vacation, constantly being around people and having limited time to myself to really feel the story and the words and the everything. Idk.

The romantic tension isn't there. And this one hurts, because I (personally, as someone who is actually really new to writing romantic tension lol) think I did this really well in TQOL, so what's different here? (Aside from diff characters, diff story, okay I get it, you know what I mean.)

I was distracted. And this one is purely my fault. I was editing chapters of TQOL for posting throughout this time, too, and even though it takes a different kind of brainpower, it was often the task that called to me more.

Overall:

So, I'm SUPER proud of myself for achieving my Camp Nano goal of 31,000 words (1000 words/day) on July 28. But I kind of wonder if maybe it wasn't quite the right time to write this story.

We'll see how the last three days of July go (I want them badges, dang it), but the true test will be in August, when I have no goal set for myself. Will I focus on the finally finishing Book 1 and letting humans read it? Will I just work on TQOL? Will angsty heist wip rise again? Or will the passion for Book 2 (which I was SO EXCITED TO WRITE) return the moment the daily word goal is gone? (lol what a joke we all know I'm gonna write Will's POV chapters for TQOL.)

Thanks for reading this pointless ramble.

[pluviacuratio-a]

♣ I'm unsure if I'll be available today. Possibly tomorrow. I don't know what activity is gonna be like for a bit.

Hospital and medical mention under the cut.

I just got a text from my uncle saying my grandma (my only living grandparent) is in the hospital with congestive heart failure. She's had a lot of issues with her health in the past year. She had a stroke in February last year and has been in and out of the hospital with issues with dehydration, utis, mini strokes, and all sorts of other things since then. There was one instance where we really thought we were going to lose her.

She's an older lady, in her mid 80s, so it isn't as if she's particularly young and she's loved a full life but...

I don't know what to do or how to feel. I don't know what I'll do if I lose her.

Im not okay right now. If I do end up writing it'll be fluffy cute things. I can't handle confrontational or angsty threads rn.

[sullustangin]

First Lines Meme

Tagged by @tiredassmage

Tagging:  @queen-scribbles @eorzeashan @shynmighty @the-sith-in-the-sky-with-diamond @reliciron annnd @chaoticspacefam  -- no pressure and apologies if you were already tagged.  If anyone wants to join in that has not been tagged, consider this an invite!

Rules: post the first sentence of your last ten fics. If you haven't written ten fics, share as many first-sentences as you have.

Ok, so I’m going to not count things I wrote for events like theme weeks, Fluffy February, or Fictober -- otherwise, this list would be done in no time at all!  This is me writing spontaneously or for other people (gifts).

10.  Theron Shan watched the Grand Master’s back as she departed from their morning caf meeting. (The Taste of Ashes aka the Ziost fic, current work)

9.  Lana Beniko stalked through the path in the jungle, hacked by the crew of Virtue’s Thief.  (The Planter of Trees and Other Tales from Yavin 4 aka the Yavin fic, which is, in my defense, shorter than Les Miserables.)

8.  …it was time to move on. He’d reached that decision less than a week before Life Day rolled around at Odessen.   (Time to Move On, a gift fic for @thelealinhypehouse )

7.  Carth Onasi may not have been able to use the Force, but he sure was able to resist any suggestion better than most sentients that Triya Dolyani had ever encountered. (That Guy, a KOTOR gift fic for @alyssalenko)

6.  Theron stared around the apartment.   (The Death of Potential//The Potential of Death, a diptych thingy I did as a two-shot)

5.  The silence in the room was never-ending.   (Maybe, the angsty medical crisis one that ends happily with Baby!Shan news)

4.  “In or out, Greydon, what’s it gonna be?”  The lady called Risha demanded a response from him, the dealer’s deck in her hand. (The Balance Sheet, a gift fic for @empire-at-war)

3.  The longest day of the year arrived.   (The Grand Reveal, aka the Rishi fic)

2.  “How can you forget you have an entire hold?” Theron asked, staring down into the darkness. (An Old Love Story, one of like 5 fics about Hylo/Gault -- I’m proud of it, even though it doesn’t get a lot of attention. Technically, yes, it was from Fluffy Feb, but it was so different from everything else I’d written, it stands alone)

1.  “What do you want for Life Day?” (The Second First Life Day, Theron and Eva’s first Life Day on Odessen)

[tj-dragonblade]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by: @valeriianz, @acedragontype, @hardly-an-escape - thank you! 💖

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 124

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 374,456

3. What fandoms do you write for? I tend to be a one-fandom-at-a-time writer, so currently that's Sandman. Once in awhile I may dip back to previous fandoms so those would be MCU, Naruto, Saiyuki, and Gundam Wing.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? *Overall (they're all from my Naruto days): Delayed (or, Why Kakashi Is Never On Time) at 3672; 11 years old Past the Limits at 1225; 12 years old Affirmation at 997; 12.5 years old Worth It at 976; 15 years old Vigil at 821; 11 years old *Current fandom tops, just for fun: Use Your Words at 398; posted last Christmas Insatiable at 357; posted in May Fluffbruary Fills at 351; posted throughout February In the Morning Light at 295; posted in April Built For You at 275; posted in April

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yeah! Seems only polite, and once in awhile conversations can start that way! Pretty sure there are some old comments scattered across some older fics that I missed in the recent years I wasn't really doing fandom, and it seems a little weird to answer them years later, but generally yes.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Going aaaallllll the way back to Gundam Wing, I did a songfic where I implied a breakup until the final-line reveal that the character had *gasp* actually died. There may be a couple other angst-based pieces in my catalog, but that I think is the Most(tm).

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Uh. Hmm. A difficult question, when most of my stuff doesn't have plot arcs and most of it is generally happy. Let's go with…the Thessaly Breakup Fic, since there was a plot-like progression of events that were based in angsty pining and culminated in the happy ending.

8. Do you get hate on fics? Never have, would like to keep it that way.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Oh no, ✨~never~✨. Which is to say yes, I absolutely write smut; I am currently writing more smut than not. Not sure what's meant by 'kind'; the kind I like to read? Hopefully the kind that makes you want a metaphorical cigarette after? I don't usually dip into a lot of the standard things that come to mind when someone says 'kink', but neither would I describe it as 'vanilla' - not the bulk of it, at least.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? I have two crossovers and one fusion; I guess the Saiyuki crossover where Hakkai acquires Jiipu from Count D's pet shop would be 'craziest'? It's a bit cracky in tone and has a complete disregard for the fourth wall.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Yeah, I don't recall which ones but I've had (and granted) requests for permission to translate into Chinese and into Russian.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yeah, a friend and I co-wrote a couple back in GW and it was...fun? Not the sort of thing I'd write on my own, and definitely not now. Co-writing again...idk. Would have to be the right timing, right idea, right personality mesh etc.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? ...yeah, that's not a thing I can answer. Whichever I'm fixated on is inevitably my favorite at the time but once the fixation fades, I still have the love for each of them.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Oh my god there are so many. Things in Sandman fandom are all still in the 'will-happen' slot of my brain with a 50/50 chance of actually finishing in reality. Going back to previous fandoms? There's the Thor/Bruce fairytale that I want to finish really badly, and the longer fic half-written where I was dipping into ace exploration that still nudges at my brain now and then. Lost all motivation for MCU fandom really fast and these two I think suffered most for that. They deserve to be finished but probably never will. In Naruto, I made the mistake of publishing two chapters of Closure when it wasn't all finished and the rest of it's half-written, but I was never that into the threesome involved and I've only gotten less so as the years have gone on. It's been 10 years since I posted the first chapter and nine since the second, and I still feel bad about it, but. Maybe I update with an explanatory note and just dump the half-written bits with synopsis so that the folks who subscribed and still care can at least see what I intended to do with it.

16. What are your writing strengths? I take great pride in my smut, and I like to think I'm good at it. Painting pictures with my words? Maybe character voice, in certain cases.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Plot. Stories with plot and progression and chapters and such. Follow-through to finish pieces that don't get done in the initial burst of focus.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? Something I've largely steered clear of after my first fandom. If I had a need for it at some point, I would want to consult a native speaker to ensure correct translation and I would include the translation in footnotes etc.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Gundam Wing. If we don't count the 'DS9 novel idea' that I recall making notes on in my journal at the time, or any of the Mary Sue thoughts I would also journal about. None of that was ever 'actual writing' nor did I have anywhere I would have shared it in '96.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? Again. How'm I supposed to pick? Ugh. Let's see, fandom by fandom. Gundam Wing was so long ago I just, ergh. Possibly I could be convinced to re-read Bah Humbug without cringing too badly. From Saiyuki, maybe…When the Chips Are Down. Comedy gen-fic based on a tidbit of fandom lore is not something I manage terribly often but I am quite pleased with this one; Jiipu's pov always delights me and I'm proud of all the voice work here also. Naruto…maybe Seized? Sai POV is one of my strengths and I think it came through really well in that one. MCU…Carpe Diem, I'm very pleased with character voices in that one. Sandman…everything's less than a year old I can't pick. But I can say that I wish the Drunken Confessions Fluffbruary fic had gotten more attention. As well as the Thessaly Breakup fic. Actually what I wish is that I'd posted them all separately in a series instead of as chapters of a single fic where they all just kind of get lost in the shuffle, I buried some gems.

Tagging, no obligation, tag me into existing posts as needed: @staroftheendless, @chaosheadspace, @academicblorbo, @rainbowvamp, @landwriter, @delta-pavonis