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#the passage of time... like what have i been doing with my life? i should have been doing something but i feel like i barely did anything
gojuo · 2 days
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what Are your thoughts on show aegon trying to escape when he finds out Viserys is dead and they want to make him king? in the books he was with some paramour, no attempt to escape is mentioned.
Though the good septon admits Prince Aegon was with a paramour when he was found, he insists the girl was the daughter of a wealthy trader, and well cared for besides. Moreover, the prince at first refused to be a part of his mother’s plans. “My sister is the heir, not me,” he says in Eustace’s account. “What sort of brother steals his sister’s birthright?” Only when Ser Criston convinced him that the princess must surely execute him and his brothers should she don the crown did Aegon waver. “Whilst any trueborn Targaryen yet lives, no Strong can ever hope to sit the Iron Throne,” Cole said. “Rhaenyra has no choice but to take your heads if she wishes her bastards to rule after her.” It was this, and only this, that persuaded Aegon to accept the crown that the small council was offering him, insists our gentle septon.
Fire and Blood, p. 398.
You see, I don't think portraying Aegon as someone who knew what was coming for him once his father died and running for the hills trying to escape that fate is an inaccurate or uncomplimentary interpretation of this moment at all. It adds a layer of tragedy to both his character and the general situation at hand if he has the understanding that just his mere existence means certain war.
The actual issue with HOTD's version of this passage is what the writers deliberately took out and what they replaced it with. Any time an adaptation removes something that is in the source material, anytime it makes changes to the source material, whether it be an addition or substitution, you have to ask yourself: why? Why would they do this? Why did the writers for HOTD ep. 9 take out the part in this passage where Aegon is convinced by Criston to take up the crown because not only his life, but the lives of his entire family members are in mortal danger if he doesn't and replace it with a line wherein he says he will abandon every single member of his family instead, even his dragon ("Let me find a ship and I'll sail away, never to be found.")?
For what reason was this change made? What does this deliberate change to not just Aegon's motivations to act & his character arc, but Criston's and the entire Green cause as well mean? Well, you don't need me to explain it to you because I have been bitching and moaning and ranting and shouting about this transparantly deliberate change to the canon for over 2 years now, ever since that piece of shit episode 9 aired in 2022. Seriously fuck this show. These writers are so fucking childish, downplaying the Green cause at every turn and taking away everything that was good about Aegon and replacing it with something that makes him look worse than he was in the book (like how in the show they changed the plot so much that he now deliberately abandoned Helaena and Jaehaera for no real reason unlike in the book). I genuinely hate everything about HOTD.
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(genderly) chill as hell if i was only ever glimpsed / detected like this
#Shrouded In A Rectangle neither sleeves nor an open front to be besieged with? yes#just doing whatever else like doesn't matter. tee cargo shorts which is my best guess rn of my ideal outfit. + sandals Absolutely#unfortunately my hair could never do that. somehow neither am i yet like forties fifties? have i not been at this for eons?#i Can be like uh let's just nobody talk to me i'm busy pensively perceiving truths that you don't ever actually wanna hear about#just the other day it was like hey....a [way Having To Talk could be a difficulty / problem] was under my nose in this lifelong pattern#certainly noticing the Verbal Exchange Demand heaped upon burnout as like [delay delay delay struggle weariness stress]#but also who knows like spent plenty of time just probably indeed Not having to have such exchanges while burned out. not noting them#anyway like this isn't even [dysphoric Ideal Outfit until i could [whatever supposed even more ideal than that gender euphoria]]#though shoutout to that but like nah get shrouded anyway. the only [how do i look] im motivated to consider is: when it's a costume#when it's just me it's like. i guess whatever pants and a comfortable enough tee. need glasses. hair's w/e so cut quite short ig#might accessorize w/things that are fun to me like hey yeah yknow i might want a calculator watch#[yea as a kid it was like :( im actively appreciating the animals supposedly Gross or Bad] if i had hated little friends Sure yaay#if i had disorienting light effects like a pelagic creature. but you don't even need that. like hey i'm nd in real life. i got it#chat i'm in the walls too bestie lmao. if only my bigfoot pose reference Step was this good#tl;dr long rephrasing of my being like; now the gender slay....#& nodding & Noting when [worksheet exercise: what's your gender euphoria look?] is like shrug idk. but this is serving maximally to me; so#going Chat how can i up my uncanny stats. looking up ''isn't it like Uncanny knowledge e.g. so like why not....canny''#but i think the un canny is the Uncanniness Accuser's perspective. not of My ken. your literal weird one maybe#so again apt to be like jk i'm just autistic & shit; i got it....horror shit challenge impossible: Don't have sm typical mundane#[disability moment] as like Unsettling danger/malice cues. challenge impossible; again#subverted here like as [horror holding hands touching foreheads w/comedy] w/o Rescinding just casual disabled behavior/qualities#just remembered like three witches weird sisters etc macbeth. weird uncanny soothsaying gendering. word#anyway i should be shrouded (made no any connection whenever i put the blanket now over my head & shoulders in place min ago)#perhaps the real Ideal Look insight: i do not have any way i wish to be observed by people. secret passages / removed room anytime
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iridescene · 2 years
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I turn 25 on Thursday...
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fursasaida · 9 months
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This article is from 2022, but it came up in the context of Palestine:
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Here are some striking passages, relevant to all colonial aftermaths but certainly also to the forms we see Zionist reaction taking at the moment:
Over the decade I lived in South Africa, I became fascinated by this white minority [i.e. the whole white population post-apartheid as a minority in the country], particularly its members who considered themselves progressive. They reminded me of my liberal peers in America, who had an apparently self-assured enthusiasm about the coming of a so-called majority-minority nation. As with white South Africans who had celebrated the end of apartheid, their enthusiasm often belied, just beneath the surface, a striking degree of fear, bewilderment, disillusionment, and dread.
[...]
Yet these progressives’ response to the end of apartheid was ambivalent. Contemplating South Africa after apartheid, an Economist correspondent observed that “the lives of many whites exude sadness.” The phenomenon perplexed him. In so many ways, white life remained more or less untouched, or had even improved. Despite apartheid’s horrors—and the regime’s violence against those who worked to dismantle it—the ANC encouraged an attitude of forgiveness. It left statues of Afrikaner heroes standing and helped institute the Truth and Reconciliation Commission, which granted amnesty to some perpetrators of apartheid-era political crimes.
But as time wore on, even wealthy white South Africans began to radiate a degree of fear and frustration that did not match any simple economic analysis of their situation. A startling number of formerly anti-apartheid white people began to voice bitter criticisms of post-apartheid society. An Afrikaner poet who did prison time under apartheid for aiding the Black-liberation cause wrote an essay denouncing the new Black-led country as “a sewer of betrayed expectations and thievery, fear and unbridled greed.”
What accounted for this disillusionment? Many white South Africans told me that Black forgiveness felt like a slap on the face. By not acting toward you as you acted toward us, we’re showing you up, white South Africans seemed to hear. You’ll owe us a debt of gratitude forever.
The article goes on to discuss:
"Mau Mau anxiety," or the fear among whites of violent repercussions, and how this shows up in reported vs confirmed crime stats - possibly to the point of false memories of home invasion
A sense of irrelevance and alienation among this white population, leading to another anxiety: "do we still belong here?"
The sublimation of this anxiety into self-identification as a marginalized minority group, featuring such incredible statements as "I wanted to fight for Afrikaners, but I came to think of myself as a ‘liberal internationalist,’ not a white racist...I found such inspiration from the struggles of the Catalonians and the Basques. Even Tibet" and "[Martin Luther] King [Jr.] also fought for a people without much political representation … That’s why I consider him one of my most important forebears and heroes,” from a self-declared liberal environmentalist who also thinks Afrikaaners should take back government control because they are "naturally good" at governance
Some discussion of the dynamics underlying these reactions, particularly the fact that "admitting past sins seem[ed] to become harder even as they receded into history," and US parallels
And finally, in closing:
The Afrikaner journalist Rian Malan, who opposed apartheid, has written that, by most measures, its aftermath went better than almost any white person could have imagined. But, as with most white progressives, his experience of post-1994 South Africa has been complicated. [...]
He just couldn’t forgive Black people for forgiving him. Paradoxically, being left undisturbed served as an ever-present reminder of his guilt, of how wrongly he had treated his maid and other Black people under apartheid. “The Bible was right about a thing or two,” he wrote. “It is infinitely worse to receive than to give, especially if … the gift is mercy.”
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onlyangel4 · 1 month
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sweet by majid jordan with lando, maybe lando didn't think he would ever fall in love again until he met reader
sweet. ln4. smau.
lando norris x model!reader
lando began to think that love was never going to find him again but after meeting reader he realised that good things come to those who wait
faceclaim: isabelle mathers
ln4fan
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liked by user1, user2, user3 and 34,273 others
ln4fan: it has been almost two years since lando and lusia broke up and since then he has not been seen with anyone in a romantic way. i feel so bad for my boy he deserves love.
view all 1,273 comments
user1: i miss boyfriend era lando so much
user2: recently in an interview he said "it is really difficult to juggle a love life and this job, at the moment the job is my priority so i am not expecting to find love at the moment
user3: i just want my boy to be happy
y/ninsta posted a story
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written: time to attend my first gp, a right of passage, can't believe i have never been to one in three years of living in monaco
f1celebs
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liked by user4, user5, user6 and 43,843 others
f1celebs: model, monaco native and longterm friend of alexandra saint mleux y/n y/ln has arrived to the monaco grand prix. she will be spending the race in the ferrari garage
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user4: i don't know who she is but she is gorgeous
user5: i just found her instagram she is stunning
user6: alex has the prettiest friends
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y/ninsta posted a story
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written: well done cha!
y/ninsta posted a story tagging alexandrasaintmleux
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written: time to celebrate bestie's boyfriend
f1updates posted a story
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written: lando norris spotted arriving at a restaurant in monaco to celebrate the gp. also in attendance charles and alex. daniel ricciardo and heidi, max and kelly, pierre and kika, along with alexandra's friend y/n y/ln
y/ninsta posted a story
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written: nights like these
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y/ninsta posted two stories
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landonorris posted a story
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written: sometimes you just need to get on a boat
ln4updates
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liked by user7, user8, user9 and 48,274 others
ln4updates: lando is spending summer break in monaco and he was spotted outside of a bar in monaco with an unknown woman. could lando be back in his boyfriend era?
view all 1,328 comments
user7: he usually goes away for summer break, i wonder why he is staying in monaco
user8: now this could be a long shot but hasn't he met y/n y/ln, she lives in monaco. that could be a good enough reason to stay.
user9: he looks really happy, that's what matters
landonorris
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liked by mclaren, y/ninsta, charlesleclerc and 1,329,233 others
landonorris: summer break done, time to get back to work
view all 13,282 comments
mclaren: will we be meeting mystery girl sometime soon
landonorris: fingers crossed for zandvoort
user10: omg he is out of his single era
user11: i am still convinced it is y/n, she liked the post
user12: looks like someone had an eventful summer break
y/ninsta posted a story tagging alexandrasaintmleux
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written: self care on the plane is essential
alexandrasaintmleux posted a story tagging y/ninsta and flavy.barla
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written: netherlands with my girls
mclaren posted a story tagging y/ninsta
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written: new driver for next season?
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y/ninsta
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liked by landonorris, alexandrasaintmleux, flavy.barla and 987,654 others
tagged: landonorris
y/ninsta: i am the proudest girlfriend in the entire world, well done lando!
view all 12,322 comments
landonorris: i love you so much
y/ninsta: love you more
flavy.barla: the perfect couple
y/ninsta: love you flavy
alexandrasaintmleux: lando should watch his back it is my master plan to steal you from him
landonorris: charlesleclerc what should we do about this
charlesleclerc: i fear there is nothing we can do
y/ninsta: you are correct cha
∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘
TAGLIST SIGN UP SHEET
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erenjaegerwifee · 2 months
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Obsession
Survive the Night: Day 7
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Paring: Neteyam x Fem!Omatikaya!Reader
Warnings: MDNI 18+, manipulation, yandere behavior, crazy and delusional reader, mentions of killing, stabbing, blood, poisoning, explicit language, praising, sweet hard sex, love making? PLOT TWIST, p in v, mirror sex, virginity loss, choking, orals (f & m receiving), belly bulge, lactation kink, breeding kink, pregnancy kink,
Word Count: 6.9k
Disclaimer: All of my characters are aged-up! If that makes you uncomfortable please feel free to scroll and don’t read or interact with my post or account.
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Neteyam’s father and your father are best friends, ever since his first time jake was introduced to the omatikaya clan all those years ago, they developed into close friends, there was nothing Jake did without your father by his side, they passed their rights of passage together, earning their ikran at the same time. They went on every hunt together and introduced their wives who became great friends as well. They even had children at the same time, all kids were both within months of each other, that includes you and Neteyam.  
You have always been a shy small girl, your only imagine to the world was innocence, you wanted no part in the hunting of Eywa’s creatures or just fighting in general. Even though you are the oldest, your siblings and the sully children made it their business to protect you; you don’t even carry a knife on hand just in case, someone is always by your side, sometimes even Tuktirey.  
Now, even though people perceive these things about you from a very young age, doesn’t mean you are unaware of how to use them, one could argue you are the best weapons master in the clan, you wield a bow almost as well as a professional archer, you have seamless movements with a knife of any kind and you even have amazingly good aim on a gun. But if anyone thought you were the kind of girl to pick up a knife and murder someone, well you would be in a lot of trouble.  
I mean how could you not in these situations? Any sane person would. You have had a crush on Neteyam for practically your whole life, well it’s not really a crush now, it’s more like you are in love with him, you truly believe that no other man would come close to satisfying you the way he would. Everyone knows you like him, but no one is aware just how deep that love runs, it’s in your veins, your blood, every cell in your body screams a want for Neteyam Sully and only him.  
It really irritated you the way women throw themselves do foolishly at your man like you're not going to do anything about it, for example the time you walk into the sully kelku to see your siblings and the sully kids sitting in a circle, “Hi everyone” you smile sweetly as they all greet you before your eyes catch an unfamiliar woman. You do not socialize much, the extent of your friends sits in this room and you are content, you see no need to look for more company, these people care for you and well, your man is already included in this circle of friend, so who on Eywa’s planet is this girl? 
You were previously going to sit next to said man but your space is taken, you wipe the little pout of your face and move to sit next to lo’ak who is the only one who seemed to read your mind, “Hey angel! What’s up?” your eyes dart to neteyam and the girl and you pout innocently at Lo’ak, “Oh nothing, just finished my shift at the healers hut, who’s that?” you said gesturing your head to the girl. 
She sat close to him, a little too close, her hand rested on his arm as she laughs obnoxiously at whatever joke he just said. She wants him, Neteyam isn’t that funny, but there he was smiling victoriously at her laughter, it made you sick. How dare he, that should be you laughing at his lame jokes. It should always be you.  
“That’s Akira, she is Neteyam latest escapade, personally I don’t really like her, she’s not that nice to everyone else” you soak in his information plotting how to fix this broken situation, you glance at her throughout the time you sat as you speak to everyone else, always subtly cutting off her sentences with your own sweet voice or purposefully ignoring her and changing the topic, it was clear she was getting a little more than irritated at your actions until she finally snapped and shouted at you to ‘shut the fuck up and stop interrupting her’  
Your heart beat picks up and you look at her startled before the water works form making her look bad for yelling at sweet little you, it surely made everyone dislike her more than they already did, that included Neteyam giving her a mean side eye before he came to sit on the other side of you to wipe your tears. He felt protective of you because of the innocent aura you put out. It is only natural he is a protector, your protector.  
It got worse for her though, after that day a week later Kiri invited her to one of your infamous girl days, you guys usually hang out and braid each other's hair, all that fun stuff. But this time she tried so hard to insert herself and honestly, she is a nice girl, it really was her fault for trying to fuck your man like that. Kiri ran home to get the combs and beads you forgot by accident leaving you alone with her.   
She was the one who brought up talking a walk, you thought it was strange but decided what’s the worst that could happen? She isn’t leaving here with her life anyways. You walk deeper into the forest and made your way next to an incredibly steep cliff, you knew if someone fell down there, no one would be about to find them. It was perfect. You walk over closer to the edge looking down at the rough flowing river beneath you ignoring her cautious words to be careful, she shouldn’t have come out here with you if careful was what she wanted to be.  
You stop a pretty looking flower growing right off the cliff, it wasn’t that far but you could reach it but Akira, she was taller. You called her over in a sweet voice and activated that innocent look you use to get your way and asked her to pick the flower for you. She stretched her neck to see it before getting down on her hands and knees bending down over the cliff to get it. You took a quick glance around before you kicked her off the cliff. 
You stood up watched over the cliff as she fell but caught herself on the same branch the flower was on, she looked up at you begging for you to save her but come on, you weren’t nearly as strong enough to pull her heavy ass up, not that you were going to try, you sat on the edge resting one of your feet on the branch before looking at her terrified expression, listening to her pleads you smile sickly, “You should have thought about what would happen to you before you got all up on my man, in case you aren’t sure which man that is whore, its Neteyam he is my future mate, he is going to love me forever, you well your trash. And now I get to through you out”  
You tilt you head laughing wickedly at her when you strike down the branch with a sharp blow breaking it. You watch her fall to her screaming death; it is only when her body fell into the rocky waves did you step back and walk to the clearing you were previously seated at.  
You made good time too, Kiri came back a couple minutes after you without suspecting a thing and asked about Akira’s whereabouts, you brushed her off changing the subject after saying ‘she wanted to go for a walk’ which wasn’t a lie. The day passed and the clan sent trackers out looking for her, Neteyam was distraught, but why is the question, you got rid of his problem not his life. You rolled your eyes but still sat next to him saying the obvious lie ‘I’m sure she will turn up.’ Her dead body was found 4 days later, broken up and ravaged by animals down the river about 2 miles from the clan. 
In the end that worked out easily for you, all of them were not so easy to make happen, like the time with a different girl Sura, she was a warrior like Neteyam, she trained alongside him every day. It was no secret she didn’t like you, she always thought your innocence was fake, while she was right no one believed her dumb comments because you would always cry, she was a bitch when you had to be the one to patch up her wounds, everyone was under the impression you were scared of her. 
It worked out well for you, since she already didn’t like you, it was easy enough to blame everything on her. It started simply with you playing a little more dumb than usual but not enough for people to get suspicious of you. Just enough to piss her off though. She liked Neteyam so you made it your business to be present whenever you could, bringing him food, refilling his water bottle, even just sitting and watching him train. 
Not that he ever said anything but you know he liked having you around him like that, paying real attention to the person that he was and not his title or his cock, not that you would mind paying attention to that cock, you see the bulge in his loincloth all the time, makes you want to wiggle your ass against his crotch and make him mount you. But you don’t mind waiting for it, I mean he is your future husband, he’ll mount you eventually.  
One day you got to the training grounds a bit earlier than Neteyam on purpose, it was great because you knew Sura was already there, along with a few other warriors in his training unit. You sat on a log spewing some dumb shit and laughing obnoxiously with the group making sure your voice was dumb and pitched just the way she hates it.  
It worked out well when she started making fun of your voice making some admittingly good insults but it wasn’t fun for her when their group leader, Neteyam catch her doing so and scolded the entire unit, making them all run laps after laps while he wraps your crying figure in her arms comforting you for the rest of the session. The look on her face was beautiful jealousy.  
When everyone dispersed and Neteyam trailed after one of his warriors to speak with him, he left you alone with her. Big mistake. You walked up to her and as she was about to tell you off like a big girl, you grab the knife off her hip and stab her in the stomach watching her fall to the ground, “remember bitch he is mine. You did this to yourself when you decided to touch what wasn’t yours” then you stab her again for good measure in the neck watching the blood ooze onto the green grass.  
Afterwards you take the knife and stab yourself in the thigh and then pulling it out and screaming Neteyam name so loud you made the surrounding birds fly away. When he came rushing back to you, you cried some bullshit about how she attacked you saying she was in love with him and you were getting in her way. He wrapped up your wound with a cloth and picked you up in his arms and ran to the healer's tent.  
It was amazing how no one questioned your story but how could they be when you were crying so hysterically you didn’t want to let go of Neteyam, when they did rip you out of his arms and pushed him out of the tent so they could work on healing your wound, you cried murderously in the hut, the entire clan heard the commotion and screaming you caused just wanting Neteyam to be with you. You fought and kicked and screamed not wanting to be anywhere else other than in his strong arm.  
He sat outside that hut listening to your screaming of his name feeling horribly, he thinks it’s all his fault you were hurt and now he can’t even help you. Tears sting his eyes as he heard your pitched voice calling out for him to make them stop hurting you. Lo’ak sat right next to him with a hand on his shoulder knowing it was hard for Neteyam to keep it together.  
After that for the next few weeks, you wouldn’t leave Neteyam’s side. Saying how grateful you were he was there to save your life, how safe you feel with him like no one can hurt you, you even slept over at their house every so offend with the excuse of being without him would put you in danger. Both your parents thought it was cute how stuck up you became on him, how well he took care of you, always making sure to clean and dress your wound, helping you get back on your feet and walking properly. He even went as far as to skip out of hunting trips because you cried about how much you didn’t want him to go. And neteyam never complained, he sat without you through the tough nights and all the crying episodes like a real husband would, you knew he was your perfect one and only, now he has to see that.  
The cycle repeated itself for a few years, girl meets Neteyam, girl wants neteyam, girl tries to make a move, girl dies. The endless cycle is getting a bit tiring honestly, you are ready to be mated now, you saved your virginity just for him while he was out and about sticking his dick in anything that breathes. You aren’t supposed to be mad, but the thought makes you fume. He has you, why would he want anyone else. 
You can’t count how many times you had an interaction with him and ran away to take care of yourself, or when you would go home for the day hot and bothers to stick your fingers into your already wet cunt, not the mention the nights you spent next to him when you would use his hand, grinding on his fingers to get some release while he’s asleep, those are by far the best times. 
The point is you are tired of having to do it on your own, you put so much work into this relationship, why can’t it just go your way for once, but low and below neteyam has other plans, his new girl, Nanti. Shes a fellow healer like you, you don’t really consider her a friend but she is a nice girl, she has done nothing but treat you nicely, until you saw her sitting next to Neteyam on the log about 30 feet away from you.  
You know she is a great healer, but not better than you though. But she is one of the healers that specialize in poison, she works mainly to find cures for the different poisons that have been exposed to the na’vi. Her team makes real head way, they do good work. But she did make it awfully easy to frame her. 
For the past few weeks since she has been hanging out with Neteyam, you started to spend more time with another woman in that unit of healing, your excuse being you wanted to expand your healing horizon, and who would question such a sweet girl? You learned about all kinds of different liquids and powders along with their antidotes that can easily kill people in minutes. You questioned and questioned until you found the perfect one. It was a light blur powder, almost grey that when added to any liquid it immediately melts blending in the drink. It was taste less and odorless, and best off all it had an antidote, it was perfect.
Despite you wanting to use it on her, you decided you killed the last girl, you should take it up a notch so you can really get Neteyam to yourself for good. The poison only takes a few minutes to take effect but you are such the antidote works effectively as soon as you inject it. The poison is meant to thin your blood so you start to bleed internally before you die. It was fast working though, killing fully grown na’vi in just 20 minutes.  
Since tonight was yet another clan celebration, you decided it’s the perfect time to carry out another one of your sick plans. You walk up to the group sitting next to Nanti casually, you slip your drink slowly, that already had the poison mixed in it and paced yourself until you had to pee. When you got up you handed your drink over to Nanti to hold until you returning making sure at least one person saw you do so.  
When you did return after a few minutes you took the drink back from her and took a big gulp then a few more to finish the drink in the next few minutes, then you waited. It was a nerve racking few minutes you almost regretted it but you knew earlier on you had slipped the antidote shot in Nanti bag making her look even more suspicious, why would you have an antidote if you didn’t have the poison? 
When you coughed for the first couple times it caught the attention of Lo’ak and Kiri cutting off their conversation to ask if you are alright, after you said you were just fine, they continued. Then you had a second coughing fit this time Neteyam noticed and it was a good time too because this time you coughed some blood up into your palm. You look up at Neteyam with teary, scared eyes. 
He made quick work pushing Lo’ak to get their dad who was sitting a couple tables away drinking with norm and your father and he rushed to your side. When they arrived, you glanced at Nanti a couple times to make sure someone knew you suspected her, Lo’ak was the only one who noticed, everyone else was caught up on helping you.  
Norm whipped out his tablet and took a blood swap rapidly testing it to find out what was causing you to cough up blood, when the test came back positive with the specific poison Lo’ak was quick to speak up, “Nanti what the fuck? What did you do to her?” 
Neteyam tried to defend that bitch but Lo’ak was quick to cut him off, “You are thinking with the wrong head idiot, she is the only person here that knows this much about poison.” Neteyam was shut up after that and Nanti took her turn to speak up, “What?! I didn’t poison her! She was hanging around my healing unit the pass couple weeks she has just as much knowledge as I do” she really tried to defend herself but Lo’ak wasn’t buying that and truthfully now neither was Neteyam, “And why would she poison herself?” Neteyam spoke up looking up at Nanti that stood next to his crouched figure next to you. 
“You- *cough cough* poisoned me?” you stutter out looking up at her with scared eyes, “Antidote?” you asked to no one in particular ignoring the way she pleaded for everyone to believe she didn’t poison you. “There is an antidote but, it takes about 30 minutes to properly make, you only have about 10 minutes left...” Norm said solemnly as if you didn’t stash and antidote in Nanti’s bag, but to be fair he didn’t know that. 
Luckily for you it clicked in Neteyam’s brain, she wouldn’t bring poison without an antidote, just for good measure. While Lo’ak and your father were arguing with norm to at least to make the antidote, Neteyam stoon up to Nanti, towering over her, “Where is the antidote?” his voice was eerily calm. She stepped back away from his figure telling him the same ‘I don’t know.’ Neteyam didn’t let her get far when he yanked her arm causing her to yelp catching the attention of the other men.  
“I’m not letting her die, where is it?” he ignored the growl of his name coming from his father as they try to make him let her go, “Neteyam I didn’t do this! I do not have the antidote, see?” she emptied the contents of her bag on the floor and the injection fell out. You watch her expression fall to her ass when he picks it up handing it to norm to inject you. He ignored her pleads towards him when he kneeled next to you once more at your side. You were in so much pain but you wanted so badly to laugh at her expression. It was amazing the things you can do when you set your mind to it.  
 After the celebration was over you were laying in the healers’ hut resting until the antidote works its way through your entire body properly, it stopped you from dying but the poison was still in there. Lo’ak and your sister sat next to you making jokes trying to cheer you up when Neteyam walked in. He had been previously discussion forms of punishment with his father about the matter and they settled for death. It wasn’t fair to her since she didn’t do anything but you could not find it in yourself to be mad about it, she did this to herself.  
You turned away from him ignoring him when he walked in and kneeled on the other side of you, you know your sister and Lo’ak saw you do that but didn’t interrupt when Neteyam tried to get your attention. “Angle are you ok? Feeling any better?” he asked in a soft voice as he ran his large hand over your head. “Am I ok? Are you out of your mind Neteyam? I don’t even want to have to explain this to you” you roll your eyes and push his hand off you. “What? What are you-” he started but you cut him off 
“Do you seriously not see this pattern? Every time you bring one of you girls around me i get attacked or insulted and not poisoned. How you counted how much times one of your little girlfriends has called me dumb or stupid? Like the time I got pushed off that high tree, or when that one crazy bitch stabbed me? It was all because I wanted to be your friend, all because I wanted to be around you. I almost lost my life today because another one of your crazy chicks tried to kill me. Just stop dating at this point” you look up to the ceiling pretending to stop the fake tears that begin pouring out your eyes. 
Neteyam feels awful it’s all his fault, he didn’t mean for those things to happen to you, and you are right, you truthfully have been by his side through thick and thin. Anything that has ever happened in his life you were a part of. It wasn’t fair you had to go through all of this just because you wanted to be around him. “Honestly bro, you’d both probably be a lot safe of you dated each other. We would stop having to ward off horny men cause Eywa forbid a woman approached your girl and she would stop dying every month”  
Neteyam rested on the comment for a minute before you spoke up, “Oh please, I’m not his type.” you roll your eyes wiping your tears. Neteyam gestured for Lo’ak and your sister to leave before he responded to your comment. “Who said you aren’t my type? I happen to like crazy girls apparently, although, those other chicks weren’t crazy, were they? You just had fun framing and killing them.” 
His words catch you off guard, before Mo’at busted into the healing tent telling you that you were cleared to leave. His words didn’t stop pondering in your mind as soon as she left you innocently questioned him, “What? What did you say?” you asked confusedly. “Why don’t I get you home then we can talk” he didn’t take you to your home, he took you to his. 
Neteyam had recently built an extension of his family hut for himself. A room equip with everything he needed including privacy because he is of mating age now and when he does bring a woman home, he wants her to be comfortable. He pulled the flap to the main entrance of the family hut for you to enter in and you see Jake and Lo’ak sitting in the common area talking. You both greet them and they ask how you are feeling which you give a sweet, ‘fine’ before following Neteyam into his private quarters.  
Neteyam closes the heavy flap behind you and walk deeper into the room siting on his bed and left you standing next to his desk that he bolted a mirror above. “So back to business? I know you’ve been killing people, that doesn’t sound like you at all” Neteyam’s tone of voice was amusement, if he knew all the horrible things he did, why did he not stop you? Why isn’t he mad? “I don’t know what you’re talking about” your tone is soft like most times you speak to people. “Oh, cut the shit angel, you don’t have to lie anymore. I know all about your little side hobbies” you make eye contact with him now, “And what side hobbies are those?” you grit your teeth slightly. “Well, first of all, I know very well that you like me, but I’m having trouble wrapping my head around just how much. I thought about confessing I liked you but then I caught a glimpse of your twisted little mind and thought I knew how much you liked me but I was so wrong so I decided to wait to see how far you’d take it. I must say angel I commend the dedication.” his words run through your head as you take in everything he says. 
“What glimpse?” you blurted out. Neteyam chuckled and sat back on his bed leaning on the wall. “Sura, I saw you stab her in the neck, I heard you spew those sweet words about how I’m yours, about how she just signed her own death sentence and I saw you stab yourself in the thigh before you screamed out for me, how do you think I got there so quick” your blood ran cold, he saw all that, you thought you were careful. “I- I” he laughed again, “I should have felt angry, scared, you killed my girlfriend but instead I was so fascinated by the way you killed her in cold blood like that, and all for me?” he raised a non-existing eyebrow at you with a sexy smirk on his face.  
“Now tell me baby? You love me that much? You poisoned yourself just for me to stop seeing a girl? You know she got the death sentence for what you did. Do you even feel a little bad? You know if that secret gets out the clan is gonna have your sweet pretty head on a stick” Neteyam got off the bed and walked towards you slowly making you match his pace stepping back until you hit the wall next to his desk. 
Your loincloth was slick, when he rested his huge arm over your head on the wall and dipped his head down closer to yours. His body came closer with a few small steps pressing you more onto the wall behind you. His hair created a curtain hiding you both from the world as he brought his lips closer to yours, “I did it all for you Neteyam, wanted you to love me and other women kept getting in my way, I just wanted to be with you, I don’t feel bad. You aren’t gonna tell on me, right?” your voice was a seductive whisper as you tip toed to bring your lips closer to his. 
You felt his breath on your tongue when he whispered back to you, “Of course not, you’re my girl, always been my sweet girl” before he kissed you for the first time. His lips were warm and wet, and he tasted so sweet like the fruits he had eaten earlier. The hand that wasn’t above your head ran over your waist and hips gripping and pulling your bottom half closer to his body. 
Your hands came up around his neck bending your body upwards on his. Neteyam is much taller than you, by a foot at least, your height ends right around his chest. You whimper into the kiss pulling away for air and look up at him, Neteyam didn’t wait another second after you inhaled and kissed you again, the hand that was on the wall ran down the length of your body squeezing the flesh that was under his fingers. Neteyam held you by both your hips and lifted your body off the floor, you wrapped your legs around his think waist and he seated you on the desk next to him. Your ass touched the cold wood and made your hiss in his mouth before he detached and kissed down your neck. 
Neteyam sucked and kiss down your neck listening to you moan and whimper under his tongue, he pulled away untying your top and tossing it over your shoulder letting your pretty tits bounce freely. He didn’t waste a second kissing down your breast, tugging your nipples with his tongue and one of his hands. Neteyam pulls away and squishes them together looking down at your pretty purple nipples, “Such pretty tits baby, you were hiding these from me all this time?” he went back down to sucking on your nipples. 
“I wasn’t hiding Tey I-I didn’t know if you wanted to see them” your voice was breathy as you spoke taking in the feeling of Neteyam pinching and biting your nipples. “So sensitive” he mumbled into your skin. He didn’t waste much more time before he pulled you off the table catching you when you stumble a bit when you touch the ground. He turned you around and you saw your reflection in his mirror. Your messy hair, naked chest, swollen lips from his intense the kiss was. Then his hand, his big hand rubbing over your nipples and up to your neck choking you slightly. He tilted your head up and he bent down meeting you in the middle for another smearing kiss.  
His body pushed yours up to the desk rocking it slightly as his other hand ran down to your ass squeezing the flesh. He rutted his harden bulge into your ass making you whimper into his kiss. He pulled away untying your loincloth while he keeps eye contact with you, “tey...I have a secret” you said looking up at him, he hummed in response asking you to tell him, “I-I’m still a virgin, wanted you to be the one to take it.”  
Neteyam let out a hearty groan dropping his head on your shoulder as he played with your tail making your face heat up. “Fuck baby- really? for me? You never let anyone in this little cunt?” his voice was strained as he spoke to me. Neteyam always knew you were an innocent girl, even after he found out about your murderous love for him, he had no idea you’ve never lost your virginity to anyone. Of course, you just keep surprising him, killing someone you have experience but you can’t take cock...yet.  
The thought made neteyam excited he felt his dick twitch thinking about what a tight little cunt you must have, you never let anyone in there before it was unmarked territory. He couldn’t wait to tear you open with his big cock, like a kid on his birthday. His grip on your body tightens when you shook your head ‘no’ and he throw your loincloth to the side somewhere forgotten. Neteyam didn’t wait another moment before he dropped to his knees resting both hands on your ass cheeks. Your hands were not placed in front you holding yourself up on the table as you looked back, down at him massaging the fat. He spread your cheeks open catching a glimpse of your wet cunt, he let go and did it again multiple times. 
His chest rumbled from the sight alone, he couldn’t believe he got you so worked you, and to find out you were a virgin he just knew you were touch starved, knowing it was only from his touch made his cock hurt in his loincloth. He watched the slick shine between your folds, he thinks it’s so pretty, your cute cunt shining for him, all slicked up he just wants to taste you. And that’s exactly what he did.  
Neteyam spread your cheeks apart wider and shoved his face in sticking his tongue out and gliding it up your folds collecting the slick in his mouth. He groans vibrating your ass, and you roll your eyes back feeling his tongue flick you clit. “Fuck angel, taste so good for me, smell so fucking good too”  
It caught you off guard when slotted his nose in there but you weren’t complaining, he was going at it. He sucked on your clit flickering it up and down, side to side, he was pushing all your bottoms so perfectly. You heard from other women getting your pussy ate felt good but you had no idea it would have felt like that. “Ah ah Neteyam!” you moan out. 
His tongue slides up to your ass wetting your other tight hold making you clench. He noted the way your body reacted too it but decided he would play with that little whole another day. “Yeah, baby feel good?” his mouth went straight back down to your slit licking and swallowing down your slick, Neteyam was drinking it, fuck the thought sent you wild, you shut your eyes imagining how sexy he must look down there pleasuring you, how fucking good it must be to see his Adam's apple bob when he swallows your juices.  
It made you a little shy but your moans and whimpers over power your feeling of shyness, his tongue feels so good, makes you wonder where he learned to do that. Neteyam sucked harshly on your clit sending you cuming on his tongue and he slurped up every bit of it, he didn’t want any to go to waste but you gushed so much on him, your juices overflowed his mouth running down the length of his neck to his broad chest... 
When the overstimulation kicked in, he pulled away and raised himself to his feet and press up against your back. “Neteyam that was so good” you slumped against him with a weary smile on your face. He chuckled and picked you up bridal style and put you down on the bed gently and untied his own loincloth now letting it join yours on the floor, he walked up to your face stroking his cock right above your nose. Your eyes crossed as you watch his insane size in front of your face as he slowly strokes it. Glowing pre-cum dripped from his tip falling on your lip. Your eyes rolled back when you dart your tongue out and tasted it, he was so sweet. You heard women say their male companions were salty but not Neteyam. He really was perfect for you. 
You stuck your tongue out of your mouth waiting for him to stick his cock in but he smiles and taps his tip on your tongue. Feeling his heavy tip hit your tongue drove you insane, when he slapped your tongue the last time your mouth caught him sucking on the tip.  
You pulled away to change your position so you’d be more comfortable, flipping over onto your stomach on your hands and knees, sticking your ass up in the air and swaying your tail as you turn your head to the side and take him in. “Fuck -fuck baby- suck on it- yea like that” he threw his head back hissing at the feeling of your small mouth around him.  
He talked you through your first time amazingly, praising you, “look so pretty with my cock in your mouth, wanna take a little more?” he pushing in deeper watching your cheeks full out with his cock stuffing you full, “Doing so good babygirl, so good” Neteyam groaned and hissed feeling your tongue circle his tip before he pulls out completely. “Not cuming in there babygirl”  
He turned you effortlessly for you to lay on your back, legs thrown around his slim waist and he crawls on the bed over you, “Are you sure you're ready for this?” he asks you. “Neteyam I've wanted this for years, fuck me...please” you look up at him seductively again making him question how he took so long to mount you. He smiles and leans down for a kiss as he rubs his tip between your folds. 
When he starts pushing in you break the kiss with a sharp gasp but his lips don’t move from yours, he stays right there while he slides his huge head into you. Your eyes screwed shut and your fingers dig into the skin of his muscular back. “Tey- too big...” you whimper out looking at him with glassy eyes, “Taking me so good baby just a little bit more” your tail comes to wrap around his thigh, your legs feel weak and the rest on his back, his tail comes up and wraps around both your ankles as to keep you close. He sings reassurance to you telling you how good you're doing and how amazing you feel clenching around his cock until he’s fully inserted into your snug cunt.  
His head drops down onto your shoulder as he tries not to cum yet and your breathing picks up at the feeling, you have never been so full before. “Nete-” you stutter his name wiggling your hips slights as the pain subsides wanting him to move. When he starts thrusting shallowly, you mewl out scraping down his back. Neteyam brings his head back up to your and kiss you, you don’t kiss back too caught up in the feeling of your pussy stretching out. 
He bites your bottom lip pulling it and when you clench on his cock he moans like a chain reaction, Neteyam raises his body to look down at his cock disappearing into your small hole and reappear, he finds nothing more interesting than watching the way you take him in so flawlessly. “Tey, faster please, fuck me faster, so good” he looks up at you when you plead and watch you prop yourself up on your elbows to watch his cock fuck into you as well. 
You bite your lip when he speeds up his thrust making you tits bounce, it garbs his attention almost immediately and he quickly gets caught up in making them bounce for him. He speeds up his thrust more becoming a bit rougher with you but not enough to hurt you. Neteyam holds back almost everything he has so he won’t hurt you, he wants nothing more than to pound into you and suck on your tits until he’s drawing milk and making you scream.  
The thought sends his mind spiraling, he can’t wait to see you breastfeeding your children, his children. To see you get round and swollen pregnant with his babies. When he knocks you up, he’ll have to bend over your pregnant form just to kiss you when he slots his cock inside, or when he dips his head down to flick your swollen nipples in his mouth tasting the sweet milk that dips out on his tongue. He wants it so bad, he wants to knock you up, make you forever his. 
“Baby I’m gonna cum- cum with me, lemme knock up this sweet cunt. You wanna have my babies, right? Gonna let me give you my babies?” he rambles out of his mind rutting int your tight cunt, “Yes yes please tey! Wanna cum! Want your babies pleaseee!” you cry out for him gushing in his cock. Neteyam is quick to follow pumping his cum deep inside you, he thrust a couple times before he drops his heavy body on top of yours. 
After a few minutes he fixes himself on the pillow dragging you along so he doesn’t have to pull out of you, as early as this relationship was, he wants his seed to take. When you rest your head on his pillow you inhale deeply taking in his scent and bringing yourself closer to his chest. “Hey baby” he grabs your attention making you hum. “Was Akira your doing too? Like what happened there?” he asked softly as he strokes your hair. You mind runs back to the memory and you decide to be honest, “Pushed her off the high cliff into that one rocky river” you wrap your arms around him and snuggle into his chest. “You have to stop killing people now you know” 
“Neteyam if people staying in their lane they wouldn’t have been hurt, or framed, or killed. It’s there out fault when they step in my way.” Neteyam chuckles even though you just admitted to half if the crimes in the clan, you did it for him. Why would be complain. 
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hardly-an-escape · 1 month
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for @bucktommypositivityweek Saturday 8/17: nicknames and terms of endearment | naming conventions | 1300 words | rated T
Tommy wasn’t much of a nickname guy. He shortened names, of course – he wasn’t the kind of asshole who insisted on calling Hen Henrietta or Eddie Edmundo – but Howie was almost always Howie, not Chimney, even after they reconnected, and the handful of other firefighters they knew with goofy monikers were still almost always referred to by their given names.
Buck had asked him about it, once; he’d assumed that an Army pilot would have been all in on nicknames and callsigns. But Tommy had simply shaken his head and said something about how, in his experience, they always came from negative moments.
Haven’t you ever noticed that? He’d said. They’re almost always based on something bad. A mistake or a close call. I don’t know, I just don’t think people should be known for something they fuck up when they’re a probie, or a raw recruit. When they’re still learning.
And Tommy wasn’t wrong; most nicknames did stem from some kind of fuck up. Usually something funny or ironic, but not always. To Buck it seemed almost like a kind of hazing ritual – maybe rite of passage would be a kinder term – like, can you really join the club if you can’t handle a little joke? But Buck also saw Tommy’s point. Saw how the loss of a name could mean the loss of agency, loss of identity, loss of control over one’s own person in a context when so much control had already been willingly given up. To service, whether that meant the military or the LAFD or just being the guy always willing to step in and do something.
Buck saw that, even if he didn’t feel it himself. For him, getting a nickname had been freeing – had been an opening up, a door to an identity he’d wanted for a long time without being able to name.
Becoming Buck instead of Evan had been – it was hard to describe. He’d always secretly wanted a nickname, wanted something cool and casual and jocular, something to show that he belonged somewhere. But Evan didn’t exactly lend itself to shortening or rhyming, and nothing he’d done in his youth had ever set him apart. Not in a way that mattered; not in a way that stuck.
He’d lived more than twenty five years of his life being Evan and feeling vaguely uncomfortable about it – until the fire academy, when someone had called him Buck and he’d just run with it, made it happen, finally carved out his own little niche in this world that suddenly meant so much to him.
And that’s how it had been – he’d just been Buck – until Tommy came along.
He hadn’t meant to introduce himself as Evan, when they met in the hangar. In fact, he hadn’t introduced himself at all; Chimney had been the one to make introductions. “Tommy, allow me to introduce you to your flight attendants for this evening’s little jaunt: Evan Buckley and Eddie Diaz. Boys, this is Tommy Kinard, formerly of the 118 and currently probably regretting picking up my calls.”
They’d all shaken hands, faces serious. The weight of the moment and what they were about to do was heavy on their shoulders, despite Howie’s wisecracking, and it hadn’t even occurred to Buck to throw out his usual line about his nickname. And later, during his tour of Tommy’s station, it hadn’t really registered for Buck until they were halfway through that the other man had exclusively referred to him as Evan. It felt too late to correct him by the time he’d noticed.
And besides, he’d realized – much later – how much he liked the sound of Evan coming out of Tommy’s mouth.
Neither of them were big on pet names. Tommy would throw out the occasional sweetheart, which always made Buck melt a little inside, but it wasn’t a regular thing. Buck sometimes went for baby in intimate moments – babe, with what Tommy called “a tone,” if he was being a bit of a brat – but it was often as much for comedic effect as anything else.
They mostly just stuck to names. For Evan, the novelty of murmuring Tommy as he kissed his boyfriend’s Adam’s apple or his stubbly cheek or down the line of his happy trail never seemed to wear off. The masculine body under his hands and lips. The masculine name on his tongue.
He asked Tommy, once, after explaining his own weirdly complicated history with his name – and his parents, and his dead brother, and his long unwitting search for an identity – why he went by Tommy, not Tom or Thomas.
“I guess it sounds a little juvenile, doesn’t it?” Tommy said. “For a guy in his forties.”
“I mean, I don’t think so,” Buck said. “I think – I don’t know, I think it fits you. Like, I’ve heard other people call you Tom, but if I called you Tom, I feel like that’s a different person, almost. Someone I don’t even know.”
“I feel the same way about Buck,” Tommy admitted. “Hen says it, I don’t even blink. I know it’s you. But if I say it? It’s like, who is that.”
“Yeah.”
Tommy shifted a little on the couch. Plucked at his jeans, wrapped an arm around Buck’s shoulders and then immediately shifted again so he could run his fingers through Buck’s hair.
“I’ve told you a little about my dad,” he said eventually. “About how we don’t… get along. Never did, really, even when I was just a kid.” He paused, for long enough that Buck looked up enquiringly, only to see Tommy staring off into the middle distance.
“But I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned that I was named after him,” Tommy continued eventually.
“Wait, really?”
“Really. I am technically a junior. Thomas Edward Kinard, Jr. He actually wanted my birth certificate to say “the second,” but my mom put her foot down.”
“Wow. I had… no idea.”
“I stopped using the junior a year or two into my stint in the service. Dropped it completely when I came out to Los Angeles. Changed my driver’s license and just… didn’t put it on the paperwork. I’m sure that won’t come back to bite me in the ass someday.”
Tommy laughed, short and sarcastic, and Buck frowned. He’d only heard that laugh a couple of times, but he didn’t like it. He wormed his way out from beneath Tommy’s arm so he could take one of his broad hands between his own, petting over hairy knuckles and a calloused palm.
“Have you ever thought about changing it? Choosing something new?” he asked hesitantly.
“No. Never. He took enough from me, over the years,” Tommy said harshly. “He doesn’t get to take my name, too, even if it did come from him. Besides, it pisses him off enough that I went by Tommy past the age of sixteen. Changing my name would feel like… would feel like giving in.”
“I get that,” Buck said thoughtfully.
He squeezed Tommy’s hand one more time, then put it aside and climbed carefully into his boyfriend’s lap. Tommy let out a soft grunt of surprise as Buck wound his arms around his neck and tipped his face up for a kiss.
Buck obliged him. “Well, for what it’s worth,” he said softly, lips brushing against Tommy’s, “I love your name. I love how it sounds when I say it. Tommy,” he murmured, and Tommy swallowed hard. “It fits you. I don’t know how else to say it. It’s you. And I – I love you. So I love your name.”
It wasn’t the first time he’d said those words, but it was still new enough that they tasted fresh and exciting.
“I love you, too,” Tommy said quietly. “Evan,” he said, and kissed him again.
this was supposed to be something fun and silly based on this post but then it developed emotions and that's why it's a day late.
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trappolia · 4 months
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MY SWEET VILLAIN, MY DARLING GOD ── nanook + gn!reader, 1.3k
nanook's birth was a fiery thing; a light piercing through the clouds like golden death, scorching the world once known as adlivun. their birth preceded the collapse of an entire universe, one that had somehow persevered through the emperor's war and was strengthening their defences against the coming of the swarm's march. the old towers of this already dying world had crumbled as the sun rose for the very last time in adlivun, marking the coming of destruction incarnate.
but for all the chaos and death their birth brought upon, the day they came into being is of no real importance to nanook. they do not remember the constellations shining upon their home when they first ignited it, nor do they recall whether or not the heat remained or if the cold dark was the first thing they felt, for adlivun was long gone by the time their golden irises illuminated what was left of the world.
it is a curious thing; for all they have discarded and forgotten of their birth, they remember yours.
what is a god? certainly not immortal, that is for sure. pantheons have collapsed with the passage of time, forgotten in the seas of lost religions. aeons are just as susceptible to death and collapse as the universes they traverse and conquer. on the same spectrum, the birth of a being as powerful as an aeon is an anomaly felt by the entire universe, a single ripple that results in the violent waves of a turning tide. such concepts are merely specks of dust for them. what use do they have for such worries, when their lives are mysteries in the known worlds, tipping the balance of the scales simply by existing?
nanook’s fascination with you could be dismissed as another consequence of the butterfly effect. they should have nothing else on their mind beside righting the worlds’ wrongs, ridding the universe of the cancer that emerges from the boundless stars to taint civilisations. war. death. destruction. finality. nanook is a jagged puzzle made up of the gods and mortals they had killed, universes scorched from existence like a supernova; and yet, you fit into their life like you were meant to be there all along.
“my sweet villain,” you whisper into their ear, saccharine sweet and painfully loving in all the ways they do not deserve. “my darling god.”
no, they want to say. they are a villain, yes — your sweet villain, if you continue to insist — but a darling god? no, that has always been you. for a being whose existence has been dictated by their status as avatar of entropy since birth, nanook finds that everything seems to come together when you press your lips against theirs, your taste sweeter than ambrosia.
you are their most infuriating distraction, they think as you sit together amongst the stars of a universe that has yet to die, clinging onto their last rays of sun and hope before nanook ends it all. it is their sweetest punishment, to have to sit here with you in their arms, so easily drawing their thoughts away from their duties and ideals— and for what? looking at the stars together? how pathetic.
pathetic, in the way they recognise these stars, these constellations. it is rare to come across any two galaxies that have the same formation of stars, as likely as to find a needle in a haystack, as mortals say. but here they are, their eyes dragging over the stars glimmering in the abyss. they know these patterns. they know their stories.
they remember the day.
“it’s your birthday,” they murmur. even in this soft tone that nanook only ever reserves for you, their voice is a booming bass that reverberates throughout the galaxy. somewhere, another star dies out.
“hm?” you say cluelessly, looking up at them with eyes that shine brighter than the golden ichor that drips down their arms.
“a mortal custom,” nanook replies gruffly, feigning nonchalance even as a shiver runs down their spine at the touch of your fingers upon their skin. “the stars are the same as they were the day you came into being.”
“ah. so it is,” you say when you finally look at the constellations.
it is a strange thing— a humiliating thing; the way nanook can barely breathe when you are looking at them, and how the air grows stale when you aren’t. it’s as if the aeon of destruction is utterly dependent on your attention, your love. how pathetic. how miserable.
how true.
the aeon may have only ascended recently, the youngest of all known paths, but they have made their mark on the universe already; whether it is with the presence of the antimatter legion, or the existential crisis brought upon by nanook’s very life. with their birth, one could no longer deny that destruction is the inescapable destiny of all the known universes; expansion, fusion, and then annihilation. it is the same for aeons; the survival of the fittest, to destroy or be destroyed, to absorb or be absorbed. for as long as people still walk on the path of destruction, nanook will continue to aim for the complete devastation of this tainted universe. they alone are the sole being who truly understands what a mistake the birth of this universe was. each ship and planet may follow a different path, but what civilisation does not speak the common tongue of war? what universe does not know death, pain, destruction?
“what universe does not know love?” you would ask them in response to that. your hands come up to cup their cheeks in your palm, and nanook is undone. “even you know love, my violent delight. why else would you have remembered the position of the stars the day i was born?”
“would you like your death day to be on the same day as your birth?” nanook questions you without any real malice, their voice breathless as you drag your thumb over their bottom lip.
you laugh, and nanook hears the stars sing with you.
why is it that mortals bother in the struggle of survival? they think. nothing lasts forever, not even the great aeons themselves. civilisations rise and fall, galaxies materialise and collapse. for a new beginning, the book must end. it is simply the way of things. nanook knows this. nanook has always known this.
and yet, in these moments with you, they cannot help but cling onto your immortality. they cradle you close, because if the aeon of destruction — of all things lost to violence and death — cannot kill you, then what can? if lan of the hunt shuns yaoshi of the abundance for loving the living too much to the point of cursing them with immortality when it is too heavy of a burden to hear, then it is only a matter of time until they realise that nanook is a threat to the balance as well. what is life without you? merely the act of existing, rather than living— chasing a goal, without ever stopping to see the stars and consider the stories behind them.
in death, nanook will be remembered as many things, and the antimatter legion will carry out their legacy just as all the previous aeons’ factions do in the present day. even if they must continue nanook’s ideals in the shadows, the aeon of destruction will shadow the known universe for all of eternity— for what civilisation exists without the pain of violence and death? destruction is a concept as sure as life and death; immortal, even if its aeon has long passed. that is nanook’s goal, their sole purpose of living.
but on this day, nanook allows themself a singular moment to hope that when they die, the universe will know them not only for the destruction they had reigned upon the universe, but for the fact that they did it in your name, for they had loved you above all else.
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ineffable-suffering · 11 months
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The Jane Austen Ball and why it was never about Nina and Maggie
Otherwise known as (*takes a deep breath*): A completely inflated close-up look at various dialogues and events of Season 2 that prove that the Whickber Street Traders and Shopkeeper's Association Meeting Cotillion Ball was supposed to be Aziraphale's confession to Crowley
Look, the point's been made before but that's never kept me from making it myself again, still. In fact, even I made it before, at the end of one of my other metas. But I feel like it's absolutely worthy enough to get its own soppy, way-too-long post. And I do love it so very much to write ridiculously long essays on something that could easily be condensed into a short paragraph.
So, here we go! Snuggle up, get cozy, settle in and, most importantly:
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(Word count: 3.177 | Reading time: ~13 minutes)
As I already said above, I laid out a similar case in my meta about why Aziraphale is somewhat of an unreliable narrator. I'll try and recycle it here briefly, so I can further make my point.
When Aziraphale arrives back in London from his Edinburgh journey, he seems oddly happy and giddy for the fact that he just had a rather odd and threatening encounter with Shax. I explain in my other meta that this is because he just spent the last hours of his drive reminiscing on the thrilling and romantic magic show adventure of 1941 and also the fact that he just found out that Crowley has been replaced by Shax and no longer works for Hell.
Ergo: We have a hopelessly lovesick Principality at our hands, who's practically swooning over his serpent who saved him, his books and his magic show all those years ago.
Ergo:
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✨This✨
Realistically, Aziraphale should probably be a tad worried about the eery encounter with Shax, in which she definitely had the upper hand on him. But well, if you spend many-a hours driving across the serene countryside (Edinburgh is about an 8-hour drive from London), pondering on one of the craziest, sticky-sweet romantic adventures of your not-life life, well ... things tend to turn a little rosy around the edges. Head in the clouds and all that. Light shades of grey!
Alright, onwards: Once the angel, filled to the very brim with fond memories and butterflies, gets out of the Bentley, he's kindly met with a face full of verdant plants and a very in-character-grumpy Crowley.
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Fhwack! Way to burst the rosy bubble.
Seriously, the absolute lightning speed with which Crowley storms out to vacate the bookshop the very second Aziraphale arrives makes me giggle every time.
Let's make a first small (who am I kidding) diversion into analysing the following conversation in unnecessary detail ...
... simply because I enjoy quoting dialogue as an accurate reference in my metas. I'll also highlight certain passages I want to comment on in individual colours so I can back up my thoughts with them below. Alright, their little chinwag goes as follows:
Crowley: "They you are! I was worried something might have happened to you." Aziraphale: "No, nothing happened to me. Very uneventful journey indeed. No strange things at all." Crowley: "Good. That's what we wanna hear." Aziraphale: "Um .. everything okay with- ah.." *nods to the bookshop* Crowley: "Oh, yeah, fine. He's singing to himself. I think he must have been asleep. I heard snoring coming from his bedroom–" Crowley, to the Bentley: "Did you miss me? I bet you did." Aziraphale: "... I'm sure it did." Crowley: "So, any more clues from the mystery of the missing archangel?" Aziraphale: "Not exactly. Or, if there are, I haven't yet cracked the case. But I'm certainly hot on the trail of something." Crowley: "I'm sure you are. Oh, by the way, the whole sudden rain and awning thing was a complete washout." Aziraphale: "Sorry?" Crowley: "You know, project making Nina fall in love with Maggie. I failed, it's your go." Aziraphale: "I see. Well then, Whickber Street Traders and Shopkeeper's Association Monthly Meeting, here we come!" Crowley: "You're really hosting the meeting?" Aziraphale: "Absolutely! And I can guarantee you, it will be a night to remember."
At first glance, this has little to do with the plot of this meta but actually, it folds into my point very nicely! However, it's not time for that yet, so we'll just state the facts as they are for now and then bring them back 'round later when we need them. That being said: For the love of Someone, will these two ever manage to simply tell each other the truth of what happened instead of thinking they can protect each other by lying about it all the time? Hrmpf. As a big fan of open communication myself, I'm close to developing a stomach ulcer with the amount of false truths being spewed here. (Then again – and yes, that is another, way larger meta I'm currently cooking up – it plays so very perfectly into the whole Jane-Austen-Pride-and-Prejudice tragic miscommunication theme that this entire Season has, so I understand the point of it.)
Very uneventful journey indeed, Aziraphale, except for the fact that you were ambushed by a demon who told you she was Crowley's successor, knows about the rumors of the two of you being an item as well as what went down in 1941 (that almost had both of you exposed) and also seems to have figured out where you and your demon boyfriend are hiding Gabriel, all in the span of about a minute. No strange things at all, nooo!
And Crowley's "Oh yeah, fine" is a total lie too. Again, we see him make an absolute run for it before Aziraphale can even enter the bookshop. After all, he just once again witnessed Jim have a Gabriel-flashback, speaking of the Second Coming, while Crowley was alone with him. As fumingly angry he is with the amnesiac archangel – he's also absolutely terrified of what might happen (to him and Aziraphale) should Jim regain his memories. So, no wonder he's quick to vacate the premises after witnessing Jim's rather eery memory flashback (and was, just like Aziraphale, threatened by Shax mere moments later, lol).
But no, nothing out of the ordinary happened to either of them. Tip-top. Absolutely tickety-fucking-boo.
Alright, let's get back on track with the actual topic of this meta. Certainly hot on the trail of something, hm? At first glance, it might seem like Aziraphale is talking about the fact that Gabriel was in company of someone whenever he went to the Resurrectionist Pub. (The clue!) However, I don't actually think he is talking about that. Why? Because, and this slipped my mind too at first, he never actually follows any of this information up, does he? Yes, sure, he went to Edinburgh, found the capital-c Clue and then returned to London. But what does he do with it? Nothing. He doesn't keep investigating this hot trail because that's not the important thing he realized during his journey. No, the more important clue Aziraphale found during his trip, is that Crowley no longer works for Hell and that he is also very much irrevocably in love with him and must confess this at the earliest given chance. (The latter part isn't necessarily a new discovery for Aziraphale, but it surely is fuelled by the fact that he just realized Crowley's out of a Hellish job and simply hasn't told him yet.)
This exchange just the perfect indicator for the fact that Aziraphale, at no point during his drive back, was thinking about the Maggie and Nina mission. He has no idea what Crowley is talking about once he mentions it and seems surprised, even, that he would. Even though they just talked about it on the phone when Aziraphale was still at the graveyard. Which is another important piece of evidence because it means that the last status update Aziraphale got of Mission Lovebirds, was that Crowley had sensed an opportunity to make them fall in love – and had then hung up on him. Why is this important? Because it means that until that very point of their conversation, Aziraphale did not know that Crowley's attempt had failed! There would have been just as much of a chance of Crowley's weather miracle actually working out and Maggie and Nina already having skipped into the sunset happily ever after.
So, riddle me this:
Why would Aziraphale spend the entire ride back from Edinburgh plotting "a night to remember" (because clearly, he already had the entire Ball planned out down to a T in his head since he goes into action right away after arriving) if he didn't even know yet that Crowley's attempt had failed?
To be very clear here: We're not talking about Aziraphale driving on the M1 to London, having a silly little idea for putting on some good music, miracle-ing Nina and Maggie to dance to it and watch them confess their love–
No.
He planned an entire actual Cotillion Ball with very particular location design that involves re-arranging the entire bookshop, specifically designed individual outfits for (almost) every single attendee, topped off with a live band, hors-d'œuvre, drinks and an actual choreographed group dance.
During one car ride.
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Where's the party planner Aziraphale AU? I'm waiting!
Now, sure, we know that it's still quite important for Aziraphale to convince Heaven of the faux-reason they gave for their accidental ✨25-Lazarii miracle✨. But if we're all honest, this all seems to be a tad much just to make two random humans fall in love, even for that.
Glittery ball gowns and suits? Red and gold wall curtains? A modified language filter? Bloody vol-au-vents?
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Talk about over the top ...
Once we start S2E5, Crowley is still surprised at the mere fact that Aziraphale is actually planning to organize the Monthly Meeting – and he doesn't even know yet that it's gonna be the most extravagant ball-boogaloo that the Whickber Street Community has ever seen! Aziraphale wanting to organize the meeting alone, is enough to render Crowley incredulous, because Aziraphale never mingles with the other shopkeepers. He usually actively avoids them and any sort of social encounters as much as he can because he doesn't care about the bloody Christmas lights, alright?
These things seem mundane and uninteresting to him, obviously, since all he really cares about is hoarding his book collection in peace like the little hedonist he is and drawing as little attention as possible to his none-business business.
Oh, right, speaking of books:
Let's take another unnecessarily detailed look at the whole Whickber Street invitation scene:
Aziraphale realizes very quickly that he's not the only one who's quite unenthusiastic about the blessed Chritsmas lights. And despite his very persuasive methods of temptation ...
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... he has to take some more drastic measurements. And those are?
That's right: Giving away his books.
I'll repeat it again, slowly: Aziraphale is willingly (!) giving away or lending his books to pretty much complete strangers to, allegedly, make two other humans strangers fall in love.
Seriously, who is that angel and what has he done with our prim, fussy, hedonistic Aziraphale that protects his books with the vice grip of an eagle carrying his precious prey?
Believe in the importance of Mission Lovebirds as much as you will, but we're talking about Mr. A.Z. Fell here who, over the past millennia, has pretty much spent every day actively working out methods to stop people from purchasing as much as a single paperback from his holy shelves.
And yet: the 1965 September Dr. Who Annual? Given away. The first edition of Expert at the Card Table that was S. W. Erdnase's personal copy? Lent away to grubby human hands to fondle around with.
Let's do another coloured dialogue diversion (don't worry, it's not as extensive as the last one):
Crowley: "You just did what I think you did?" Aziraphale: "I'm not prepared to talk about it." Crowley: "You gave away a book." Aziraphale: "I had to! Maggie and Nina are depending on me. They just don't know it yet."
Crowley backs up my point: This is a huge deal. Aziraphale does not sell his books – let alone give them away for free. We're all shocked! Flabbergasted!
And the explanation Crowley and us get just ... doesn't satisfy. Something and someone sure is depending on this Ball and doesn't know it yet. But it's most definitely not Maggie and Nina, folks.
You know for whom Aziraphale would give away his books in the blink of an eye, though?
Mhm, that's right.
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This pretty old serpent.
I want to take a minute to show you the reaction again that Aziraphale has upon entering the very same magic shop him and Crowley went to in 1941 to acquire the Bullet Catch:
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You ... you need a minute there, angel? You're sure looking a little ... affected.
And I mean, well, no wonder. He reminisced about that very memory four hours last night. To him, this shop is where the most turbulent, ecstatic, adrenaline-fuelled and romantic night of his life began. And it shows.
I've made my point in my other meta series about how Aziraphale is an incredibly nostalgic character. He romanticizes so many things in his memories – especially the parts that feature Crowley. So, it doesn't surprise me in the slightest that he's once again willing to loosen the tight grip he has on his book collection to get the successor of Will Goldstone's Magic Shop, the shop that started it all for him, to come to his fancy Ball.
As we watch Aziraphale and his little lap dog demon pat around Soho, I'd like to take another second to point out that he goes to seven or more establishments before he even invites Nina.
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... and he only does so because she starts talking to them on the street. Almost like he'd forgotten about it. Why not ask her at the very beginning? To establish whether or not he'd have to book-blackmail her too?
"Perfectly ordinary invitation with no hidden agenda of any kind", except that he's using you and Maggie as a pretence to resolve his own clusterfuck of a relationship-miscommunication Jane-Austen-style so that he can then hopefully confess his undying love to his demon not-boyfriend boyfriend.
Marvellous!
You'll forgive me another short diversion but my God, the whole exchange at the Marguerite's restaurant with Crowley literally cat-call-whistling Aziraphale over to him (and Aziraphale checking if he meant someone else first, I–)? I am weak. So, so weak and
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However, this is also when we get a snippet of Crowley finally revealing the truth in place of his "Oh, he's fine"-lie earlier and telling Aziraphale that he's actually pretty scared Jim might turn back into Gabriel and smite him altogether. And Aziraphale's response is, in a cosmic sense, (remember the pink paragraph now) so hilarious:
"Have you thought of just talking to him?"
Yeah, have you? Have any of the two of you? Just thought about talking? To each other? About anything?
'pparently not. But hey, it's all good because remember what the ultimate remedy for star-crossed lovers simply misunderstanding each other is?
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Bish, bash, bosh, problem solved!
Back at the ballroom bookshop, Aziraphale sends Crowley to invite Maggie in order to, in my opinion, not spoil the Ball-y surprise for him. (Inviting Maggie only now?! Wouldn't she be one of the only two guests who really should attend? Why the short notice? If she's really that important for the Ball you're planning, hm?)
On top of this, we see Nina almost not attending the Ball meeting after her partner broke up with her and Crowley being the one who coincidentally runs into her and ushers her into the bookshop before Shax and her "legion" of demons start creeping up on them. Again, if this hadn't happened by pure coincidence, Nina would have left to go home and this whole Ball would have taken place without her, rendering the apparent sole purpose of making her fall in love with Maggie useless.
Why doesn't Aziraphale care more for both of them to attend and be there? Why is he instead busy fussing over everything looking perfect and wonderful and doesn't even seem to notice that both Nina and Maggie are really late to the meeting?
Well. Well.
The answer's in the title, babes.
Alas, Crowley safely gets Maggie and Nina to join them, Mr. Brown is the only one who doesn't get a miracled outfit (fussy, petty angel, you just don't like him, do you?), Jimbriel stuns with glamour and flirt (and whatever sexually suggestive thing he does with his cheeks) and the Whickber Street Ball is a-go!
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Sorry, I just had to chuck this in again because Crowley's face here absolutely kills me every time. He looks so confused, I am hollering.
And the heart eyes Aziraphale is making at Nina and Maggie now that they're actually here?
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Oh, bless it, angel.
He's all like "Oh look, it's working! Jane was right! It's all going to be resolved, all the misunderstanding and quarrels! Crowley, where's Crowley–"
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Ah yes, there he is.
Ladies and gentlemen, this is an angel who is not listening to a single word being said right now. No, in his head, Aziraphale is already down on one knee, pouring his heart out to Crowley after they just danced the night away.
Oh, yes, right. The dancing.
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Parallel much?
But well, as marvellous and beautifully romantic as her stories tend to be, it turns out that Jane Austen isn't always right after all. Because before we know it, the perfect night shatters into many-a tiny pieces (literally).
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And once again, fhwack:
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... the rosy bubble bursts.
Let's take one more deep breath so I can make my final point:
In S2E2, Aziraphale explains to us very exactly what Jane's Balls (hrhr) used to be about: Solving miscommunication and confessing love to one another.
During his car journey back from Edinburgh, Aziraphale:
doesn't know Crowley's Mission Lovebirds had failed
remembers 1941 and just how badly he's in love with Crowley
and also realizes that they seem to have been wildly miscommunicating for quite some time now. (Crowley didn't even tell him he basically got let go!)
So, what does maddeningly strong love plus a want to resolve all the miscommunication equal? That's right: A night to remember! A Ball to change it all! A dance, a vol-au-vent, a confession. And, ideally, a happy ever after. Because:
“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man angel in possession of a good fortune Jane Austen collection, must be in want of a wife demon husband.”
The Ball was never for Nina and Maggie. As a byproduct, maybe, yes. But the whole rest of the glimmer and glamour, the careful, romantic planning and set up of it all, the book-bating the other shopkeepers– that was for Crowley and Crowley only.
And oh, if only it were as easy as in the books.
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*whispers* I'm sorry, I had to.
***
Your honour, the tinfoil-hat crackpot defence rests. Feel free to share thoughts (and prayers) if you want to!
Au revoir! 💗
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itwasntimethatdidit40 · 3 months
Text
Perfect.
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Pairing/AU: Soft Boyfriend!Joel Miller X Curvy AFAB!reader , no outbreak.
Words count: 3612, One shot.
Summary: Basically Joel worshipping you and your curvy body ❤️
Warning: +18 only because there is a little bit of smut in the end (Joel 🍽️😺), nothing too serious but still. Reader is curvy, has wide hips, big breasts, has hair (not specified how long or what color it is or anything), has a freckle above her upper lip. Age not mentioned but they’re both fully grown adults. Joel is the cutest and loves you deeply like anyone has ever done before. (If I did things right you will end up crying a little bit, hopefully)
We talk about not accepting ourselves, seeing ourselves as ugly, having a bad relationship with a parent (mom), briefly about bullying and in general about how society perceives non-conforming bodies and how sometimes we convince ourselves that we are wrong. I don't go into much depth but there are still some passages that I feel are truly mine, so you are warned. I don’t want to trigger you, I want you to feel beautiful and valid and one of a kind and special. All of you.
I was toying myself with the idea of a story about Joel and a curvy reader and this came out. I wrote this at 2am after listening to “Pedro” and “Glow” by Omar Apollo with tears streaming down my face, it’s probably full of mistakes (English is not my first language, no beta reader because it’s 2 fucking am and I should sleep like everybody else in my time zone instead of doing this DAMN!) so I beg your pardon, my brain is a mess right now.
Most of all, I hope you will like it, let me know! Thanks to anyone who will read this.
You wake up in bed alone and you stretch your arm on the other side of the bed feeling it empty and cold.
Joel is out for work, meeting a big potential client who wants to renovate his huge mansion.
Obviously he has to try to get the job, but you feel like he's been forever away when he's only been gone for two days.
Your bed feels so large without him in it.
You grab his pillow to try to inhale his scent, just a little tiny bit of him that still lingers on it.
Your man smells amazing, even when he come home after a full day of working in a construction site you’re madly aroused by the minty, sweet, sweaty essence of him.
You don’t care that he’s covered in dust and rubble, you just throw yourself in his arms and take his mouth that rightfully belongs to you and only you and you feel so lucky and blessed to have him in your life.
You had so much troubles with your love life.
You’ve never been skinny, to begin with.
You always had a discomfort with your appearance, your friends were tiny and cute while you were just standing there being ignored.
You had a very almond mother that didn’t waste a chance to remind you how big you are, how much you need to take diet more seriously and become the skinny person every guy wants to marry.
You suffered from that until you were an adult and you could afford going to therapy.
It helped you a lot.
Embracing your body and shape was a long and difficult process but it was worth it.
You gained so much confidence and learned how to be kind to yourself.
But you still had difficulty with boys, growing up you learned to notice strange guys at first glance, after a series of failures with gym fanatics who wanted to change you, older men who wanted to control you and cowards who kept you hidden as if they were ashamed of you.
And then, one day, you met Joel.
While you were looking at him from the other side of the bar too shamed to do anything he walked towards you.
You immediately thought that he was coming to talk to your skinny friend that was with you but no.
He wanted to spoke to you.
That big strong man, broad chest and shoulders, wavy dark brown hair and eyes like the most delicious chocolate cake introduced himself and asked if you wanted something else to drink and the last thing you know you two were talking about everything for 3 hours straight, totally immersed in each other.
You barely noticed that your friend tap your shoulder to tell you that she was going home.
You mentally took a note to apologize profusely to her the following day but you really didn’t want to leave.
It felt too good to be with Joel, talking to him was so easy and he melted your heart in a way you didn’t experience in a long time.
You really didn’t want to give up on him.
You have so much in common with him and he made you laugh and you felt cute and confident and it really worked like magic.
He made sure to compliment your outfit and your hair and your pretty eyes and he made you feel so good about yourself.
You noticed the way he was smiling and looking so intensely at you, he was hungry and turned on by you.
You couldn’t believe that this handsome man was so into you but couldn’t ask for anything better.
You never really parted ways after that first night together, he was a perfect gentleman, took you home on his truck and he never tried to touch you until the two of you arrived at your door.
He was saying goodnight to you when you heard him whisper “oh fuck it” and he kissed you, no longer holding back. It was a perfect kiss, full of desire and passion and you could feel his need for more through his lips and the way his tongue found its way into your mouth.
You felt vulnerable and weak as if he really saw you, beyond appearances, beyond fences that you have built to defend yourself, in the most hidden part of yourself. And you didn’t mind feeling that way in front of a man, in front of him.
You knew it was right.
You could feel it in your bones.
You wanted to drag him inside the house but you stopped just in time before completely losing control.
“I don’t do this at first date, you know” you whispered in his ear while he was kissing your neck giving you shivers down your spine.
His mouth was eager and insatiable, nipping at your skin like he was starved, but again, he was a real gentleman and didn’t do anything you didn’t wanted.
He was fully respectful of your boundaries and conquered your heart with patience.
At your fifth date you were so thirsty for him that you couldn’t even get to the restaurant.
He knocked at the door dressed in dark blue jeans and a white t-shirt that hugged his biceps and his chest in a way that drove you completely wild, you took his hand without saying a word and run to the bedroom dragging him with you with no shame whatsoever.
You didn’t care about manners, dinner that was booked the week before, whatever else that could delay that moment.
You just wanted him.
You felt safe with him and this made you even more horny.
He fucked you wildly and then cuddled with you in the sweetest way ever.
Your heart was full, your body soothed and your thirst quenched.
You moved in together after 6 months of the most fulfilling relationship you had ever had.
Joel has his flaws, he is stubborn, when he is angry he can barely speak and mutters under his breath, he doesn't know how to cook, he's messy and leaves his dirty socks on the carpet in the living room, sometimes he's way too protective and it drives you crazy the way he always tries to warn you off from everyone as if you're not used to assholes.
Minor things compared to how he makes you feel anyway.
When he loves, he loves deeply.
He showers you with compliments and nice gestures, he’s a grumpy with a heart of gold.
And he’s handsome. So handsome you can’t believe that he’s your man even if he makes sure to tell you how beautiful, smart and sexy you are everyday.
You yawn and finally decide to get up, you head to the kitchen and make yourself a coffee.
It’s Saturday and Joel is supposed to come home in a few hours.
After breakfast you do some chores and cleaning around the house.
You go to the supermarket to buy ingredients to make his favorite dinner.
And then you decide to take the afternoon to yourself, you take a long bath and relax in the tub listening to music lulled by the hot water and the scent of bubble bath.
Once out, you decide to wear the dress you wore on your first date with Joel.
You remember perfectly how he looked at you and you feel a shiver down your spine. You haven't worn it for a while and as soon as you put it on you discover that it is too tight on your breasts and hips. You know you've gained a few pounds since you've been with him, you're relaxed, you're happy, you don't care, but you really wanted to give him a perfect evening and this makes you nervous. You look in the mirror and fall back into all the negative thoughts about yourself. It's a fragile balance.
You're still navigating the middle of it, even though you're much better.
You take off the dress and put it back in the closet, hidden, where you can barely see it, hoping bad mood will pass even though you know it has completely ruined your day.
You start cooking, leaving the decision on what to wear until later.
You like cooking and have always been successful at it, your grandma shared all her recipes with you and teached you all her secrets.
Your mother just told you the calories in everything you cooked.
When everything is ready you go to get dressed, you stare at your clothes for what seems like an infinite amount of time, sighing. In the end you choose another dress, black, narrower at the waist and wider at the hips. It leaves your legs uncovered, it's not like the other one but it still suits you so you make the best of it.
You’re spraying yourself with your favorite perfume when you hear the keys turning in the lock and you instinctively run to the door.
As soon as he opens the door you don't even give him time to enter and you throw your arms around his neck.
“Hi sweetheart” he whispers in your ear as he wraps his arms around your waist, holding you tight against his chest “did you miss me?”
You can hear a little laugh in his voice as you reply “of course, I couldn't wait for you to come back”
You take his lips with urgency and just feeling his scruff brushing gently against your cheeks and your cupid bow makes you feel better.
He tastes sweet, he’s warm and familiar.
He never fails to make you whole.
When you're with him it feels like the world is turning right, like things are all falling into place, magically.
One look is enough for him to understand you.
His tongue makes room into your mouth so easily and intertwined with yours and you’re lost in his embrace.
When you finally part to take breath he’s grinning and watching at you with burning desire in his eyes.
“I missed you too. Let me see you, sweetie. I want to admire my beautiful babe in this dress”
You instantly feel better and do a pirouette laughing to make him look at you.
“Jesus, hun, it’s really amazing on you”
You walk up to him and give him a kiss on the hairless part of his beard, then take his lips again.
You moan into his mouth when his hands move to your ass, stroking it gently then squeezing it.
“I love your ass babe, so full and juicy and soft”
You whine at his praise, kissing his jawline and his neck.
You rest your face on his chest enjoying his warmth.
“It's amazing how you always make me feel better. I felt like crap a few hours ago." you murmur.
“Why, love, what happened?” you can clearly hear concern in his voice.
“I wanted to wear the dress I wore the first time we went out…but it's too tight now” you whisper, a little bit ashamed.
He cups your face with his hands, looking at you with sweetness.
An incredible sweetness that instantly melt your heart.
“Don’t be sad babe, a dress is just a dress, it doesn’t fit you anymore? Who cares. You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen and I’m so lucky to have you”
You want to cry, but you don't, instead you take his lips back into yours, grateful to have a man like that by your side.
No one has ever made you feel more loved than him.
You kiss him intensely, so much that you're almost breathless, but it doesn't matter.
You feel his erection pressing against your thigh and you can't wait any longer, you even forget about dinner already being prepared and he doesn't seem worried either.
“Can we go to our bedroom already? I need you so bad, Joel” you pant against his skin.
“Whatever my love wants” and he take you by the hand “I definitely need to remind you how much I love you and how incredibly sexy and lovely you are. Come with me”
He takes you to your bedroom without stopping to hold your hand and makes you sit on the edge of the bed.
He looks you in the eyes as he caresses your cheek with his knuckles. It's incredible how delicate his big hands can be.
He trace the outline of your jaw with his fingertips never stop looking at you.
He then moves to your neck, placing his hand right under your ear, his fingers hidden in your hair.
He leans down to kiss your nose and your lips, so softly.
“Babe, you’re the most precious thing I have in my life, I don’t know what I would do without you”.
His voice is low, slightly hoarse, it surrounds you like a hug, it goes straight to your heart, every little intonation that characterizes it, how it glides over the vowels and caresses the consonants, his breathing, that warmth that emanates, that sense of familiarity and comfort, his sensitivity and his inner strength and his fragility that he is not afraid to show.
He lowers the straps of your dress and makes you stand up just for a moment to let it fall at your feet, sliding it over your hips.
He makes you lie down on the bed, while he also undresses, remaining in his boxers. He climbs onto the bed and lies down next to you.
“Never forget how gorgeous you are, please”
His hand slides over your breast, still covered by your bra, he searches for your nipple and takes it between his fingers, pinching and pulling it gently.
“I love your tits, so big and perfectly shaped” and he kisses you there. “I love your pretty face, and your smile and your sparkling eyes and your luscious lips.” Each word is followed by a kiss on the body part he just mentioned “And your silky hair. And this freckle right here. Above your upper lip. I would do nothing but kiss it all the time. I love the smell of your skin and your taste, so sweet.”
You can't believe he's doing this, he's literally worshipping every part of you.
“I love your incredibly sexy hips and thighs."
His lips move over you like velvet, like butterflies flapping their wings on your skin, so impalpable and yet so real.
“I love every inch of your body, especially those that seem too much to you. And of course I love your intelligence and how you laugh at my stupid jokes that never make anyone laugh. I love that you’re funny and sarcastic. I love the little wrinkle that comes between your eyebrows when you concentrate. I love the way you squint when I say something about my work that you don’t know. I love the way you look at me, I love hugging you and feeling your breathtaking body on mine.”
Joel isn't one for many words, he generally prefers action but now he's a river in flood and looks at you haunted.
It's an incredible feeling to have him all to yourself, to have the certainty of being able to trust him blindly, without the fear that he will turn out to be like everyone else you've been with.
No one has ever treated you this way before, with devotion, as if your body were a priceless treasure.
You yourself were mean to this body, you hated it, you tried to change it, you cursed it and cried because it didn't look like anyone else's when the only thing you wanted was to be like one of your friends.
Thin. Impeccable. Someone who fits any dress and who has never heard "we don't have your size". One who wasn't laughed at, treated like a joke, one who everyone looked up to, one whose face people didn't throw pies at and call a whale or a monster.
Joel knows all this. You told him. And everything he's ever tried to do is exactly the opposite of what they've always done to you.
An ode of love to you, to your body, to your soul.
He moves between your knees, settling at the end of the bed.
He leaves a trail of kisses along your inner thighs moving up and up towards your pussy, his beard deliciously rough on your skin.
He smiles at your already wet panties, at the unmistakable stain that spreads across the front.
You wore a cute white lacy pair with matching bra that he bought to you last Christmas.
You sigh in anticipation as he takes the time to stroke and tease your clit through the fabric with just one finger.
He then slides his fingers into the sides of your panties, he makes your hips rise slightly and takes them off, smiling at you.
You gasp as he buries his face between your legs kissing your folds so softly, he stick his tongue out and lick your lips and then part them with two fingers and kiss your clit.
You moan loudly and feel his smile widening on your skin, he’s so good at this and he knows that you love the way he does it.
He takes your clit in his mouth and suck gently.
“You’re so wet babe” and he kiss your lips again “so good for me, the perfect woman”
He teases your hole with his tongue, just the tip, while his thumb circle around your clit.
Nice and slow, a steady pace that makes you whimper against his face.
You grab his hair pushing him even more against your pussy, whining in pleasure.
You feel his beard crawling across your skin, you know it will redden your skin but you don't care, you don't care about anything now.
He continues to lick you, up and down and then back to your clit, his large hand splayed on your tummy.
You've always been ashamed of your tummy.
He adores it. He always tells you, he likes to touch it and he likes to kiss it and he loves that it’s so soft and fluffy.
He groans as you tug his hair and increases the pace, making his way into your hole with two of his thick fingers, stretching you and searching for the spongy spot that always makes you feel on fire.
You raise your head slightly to look at him and see his eyes staring at you mischievously and proudly, he likes looking at you, he doesn't want to miss a second of your pleasure.
He’s again on your clit with his mouth, swirling around it with his tongue.
He pumps his fingers in and out of you, you whine again and again more and more loudly.
He doesn’t stop.
“Joel I-” your voice cracks in an attempt to say something “God, I just can’t”
“Yes, you can, babe, just come for me, I want to feel it. Come all over my face”
you whine, squeeze his head between your thighs, your hand tucked in his hair “Joel!”
You feel a heat radiating inside you, your orgasm building as he gives you no respite.
“Come on baby, give it to me” he whispers softly on your skin.
And you do. You explode at his praise, at his begging for you to give him what he wants.
You pant loudly as he doesn't stop licking you until you calm down.
He comes back next to you and kisses you. You taste yourself on his lips, on his tongue, you're all over his face and it drives you crazy.
“Fuck me Joel. Fuck me now, please” your voice comes out almost desperate.
He looks at you, nodding without saying anything else, takes off his boxers and climbs on top of you, making you spread your legs to make room for himself. He takes his cock in his hand and rubs it on your clit. Once, twice, three times, wetting it with your pleasure that slid down to your inner thighs.
“You want my cock, babe?”
You nod repeatedly looking at him with beg in your eyes.
“Tell me how much you want it”
“I want it, Joel. I want it so bad. Please”
He enters you effortlessly, even though he's big, much bigger than any man you've ever had.
“Always so tight for me, God, you’re so amazing”
He wraps his arms around your torso and pulls you up to sit on top of him, he’s sitting on his heels, his cock still inside you.
He kisses you deeply, his tongue licks hungrily into your mouth, he holds you tight against his chest, you moan into his lips feeling you totally enveloped by him, your arms around his neck, ruffling his hair, your thighs around his waist.
His cock burns in your center, he moves his hips to sink into you, deep.
You feel like you're one, you're totally drunk on him and it's an overwhelming thrill.
He fucks you like this, holding you close to him, each thrust harder and harder, your face hidden in the crook of his neck.
You fill your nostrils with his scent, his masculine unmistakable scent, the one you were missing this morning.
The scent that smells of home and comfort and caresses and the purest love you've ever felt.
It’s here now.
And it’s yours.
You end up hugging each other on the bed, tired but incredibly happy. You are still held in his arms as he whispers “I love you” into your hair.
You look up and look him in the eyes and you know it's true.
"I love you too.”
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corruptedcaps · 4 months
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The Corrupted Daughter
Finally after long last here is the follow up to this year's MARCH MADNESS winner The Corrupted Queen. Enjoy!
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Abigail strode loudly through her vast facility and ignored the various bowing her lowly employees were giving her. She usually loved basking in their sycophantic behaviour but right now she was majorly pissed off.
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Slamming the door of her cavernous office shut, she approached her large ornate mirror and took a moment to look at her perfect reflection. It had been nearly 20 years since the various corrupted objects that now adorned her body had escaped from their cages and transformed her from a nobody scientist into the formidable queen bitch she was now. Despite the passage of time, the evil that powered her allowed her to remain unchanged, a vision of leather, latex and lethal power.
“Mirror where is Lilith, where is my daughter?” Abigail finally said having reminisced enough. Her reflection began to swirl and turn black. Over the years she had acquired many new artifacts that she absorbed in some way shape or form but some objects like the mirror could not be assimilated for obvious reason. However, that didn’t mean they were of no use to her.
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An image began to reveal itself in the mirror, blurry at first and growing steadily sharper until she recognized it as the facility she was in. It showed the black windowless building from the outside with the name “QA” in giant white letters along the side. Of course most people assumed it was a company called Quality Assurance, but everyone who worked for her knew it meant Queen Abigail.
“This is it? Nothing more specific? I should have the metal department melt you down.” Abigail said disdainfully.
“I’m sorry my Queen but as you know your daughter is immune to-” The mirror began to speak but Abigail quickly cut it off.
“You don’t need to remind me.” Abigail said with a tone that told the mirror not to say another word. Abigail sighed annoyedly as she walked to her desk.
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Each day her daughter was testing her patience. Abigail had once hoped that Lilith would one day stand side by side with her and rule together as a powerful combination but that idea was dashed when she tried to give her her first corrupted item at the age of thirteen.
Lilith had embraced being a spoilt brat for the first twelve years of her life in a way that made Abigail immensely proud. Lilith herself was looking forward to getting her first of what she assumed would be many corrupted items.
“Mommy what will this allow me to do?” Lilith said as she eagerly took the corrupted necklace from her mother.
“You’ll be able to make any boy your age your puppet. It’s just a small taste of the power you’ll-” Abigail had said but was cut short by a her daughter screaming. The necklace was heating up fast and Abigail barely got it off Lilith before it exploded.
At first Abigail thought it was sabotage and she had many members of her team tortured to find the truth but when she gifted a new item to Lilith and the same thing happened it was clear something else was at play.
In a cruel twist of irony for the Queen of Corruption, her daughter was immune to very same evil magic that fuelled Abigail’s rise to power. Abigail tried to console her daughter but as the weeks and months followed, Lilith grew bitter and resentful of all corruption. Before long it morphed into hatred directed at her mother.
The following years Lilith grew further from Abigail, rejecting her bratty life she had once loved. She became a kinder more gentler person. She started slowly destroying the many corrupted artifacts stored in the building. She soon went by ‘Lily’, feeling ‘Lilith’ was too evil sounding.
By the age of fifteen she had fled her home and found solace in the underground rebels that fought Abigail. With Lily on their side it became even easier to destroy the corrupted objects that Abigail sought.
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Now nearly five years later, Lily was the leader of the rebels and had just destroyed the biggest shipment in the history of Abigail’s company. Abigail’s pressed her fingers next to her temples, her headache growing. She looked at the lockers that adorned her wall, filled with items of corruption she had collected over the years. At least she still had those.
Just when she thought it couldn’t get any worse the doors to her office burst and in strolled her daughter and a small contingent of her army. Abigail looked nonplussed however.
“Hello darling, having a sleepover with some friends are you?” Abigail said sarcastically as she rose lazily from her seat.
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“Your tyranny ends today mother!” Lily said confidently. Abigail looked at her daughter with sadness, so much wasted potential.
“Oh does it? Well you might find that a little hard to accomplish when you’re fighting your own men.” Abigail said with a smirk and a flick of her wrist causing one of her many lockers to open. A simple pair of earrings sat inside but with the door now open and Abigail's command, the earrings flew through the air towards Lucy’s lieutenant. They would corrupt him into a formidable bitch under Abigail’s control.
However the man stood steadfast and as the earrings rocketed towards him. A the last second he suddenly produced a small box from behind himself and held it out in front. The earrings flew straight in and he closed the box shut. Abigail was shocked but didn’t let her smirking superiority wane.
“Clever girl aren’t we? Your little capture boxes are cute but my security will be by any second with an overwhelming amount of-” Abigail began.
“Corruption? I don’t think so.” Lucy said with a knowingly smile as she and her men parted, revealing a large stack of boxes behind them. Most were vibrating with the dark corruption inside but all were locked away safely. Abigail look worried for the first time in two decades.
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“It’s over, I’m here to free everyone from this wicked evil, including you mom!” Lily said determinedly but Abigail wasn’t about to give up so easily.
With furious rage she started to command all the lockers to open and the various objects flew out towards the formidable army in front of her. Lily's men were too fast however, easily capturing opbject after object, while advancing towards Abigail.
In desperation, Abigail started to remove items from her own body and hurl them at the men. Bracelets, rings, boots, gloves, everything she could send at them she did, even as she felt her power wane by doing so. She knew if she could get just one of them she’d gain the upper hand but Lily had trained them well, they captured item after item with precision as they advanced on her.
Before long she was one the ground, all that was remaining were her notorious corrupted black pigtails. Lily’s men held Abigail down. Lily approached with a box in hand and quickly scooped the tendrils into it. Lily and her men watched as Abigail’s body convulsed and reverted back to her plain form of Abby. Still as young as the day she was corrupted but now lacking any power.
“Lily?…” Abby said groggily.
“That’s right mom, you just rest for now. My men will take care of you and I’ll get started on destroying these.” Lily said compassionately to her weak mother.
Lily stepped over towards the pile of boxes and looked at them dauntingly. There was a lot to get through but it would be all worth it. Opening the box in her hand she grasped the hair. Its strands weaved violently in her hand but Lily knew within a few seconds it would be nothing more than dust.
However when after a few seconds this didn’t happen, Lily instead started to hear a voice in her head.
“Lillllllly. Beautiful and pure Lily. Don’t you remember how good it was to be a spoilt brat? You were being moulded into being a corrupted princess and you loved it. Even now as a rebel you couldn't resist amassing an army of loyal followers. You’ve enjoyed the power haven’t you? Put us out Lily. You were to be a princess but let us make you a queen.” The voice purred.
What no one had expected was that Lily’s power to destroy the evil artifacts was dependent on her mother’s connection to the corruption. With her mother being purged of the evil, Lily’s power was suddenly gone, along with her immunity to being corrupted.
Lily’s breathing grew deeper as the voice of temptation started to overwhelm her. She could feel the hair pulsating in her hand, desperately needing to be set free. It's desire was infectious and Lily found herself starting to stroke the hair lovingly, almost in a trance.
“Wear uuuuuussssss Quuuuuueeeeennnnn Lillllllllttttttthhhhhh.” The voice hissed from the hair that only Lily could hear. Images danced in her head of being wicked and bad, of being all powerful and beautiful. Memories of her youth, of being a bratty bitch were flooding back into her mind making a wicked smile curl up on her lips as her panties became wet.
“Yesssss, it's what I deserve!” Lily purred as the temptation grew too much and she lifted the wig to her head. Letting go of it, she groaned as it snaked its way over her head and buried deep into her scalp.
Throwing her head back she groaned in ecstasy as the wig that was once her mother’s filled her mind with evil and depraved thoughts. A long since buried part of her mind was unlocked.
“Mmmm fuck yesssss! Make me into the wicked hawt slut I was destined to be! All of you!” She yelled as she began picking up box after box, letting the corrupted items out. Each item attacked her body with ferocity, even as it began to change rapidly.
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Her breasts heaved and broke out from her small bra but were quickly captured by a tight latex dress. Long talon like nails grew from her fingertips as black latex gloves covered them like a sheath.
“I was denied my birth right for so long! Now I can become the bad bitch I was always meant to be! That I always wanted to be!" She groaned as she used her new power to open the boxes even faster. By the time her men realised what was happening, it was too late. They turned to see their leader had transformed into a wicked reflection of her former self.
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“Lily! You must resist-” One of them cried out before Lilith rolled her eyes and commanded a corrupted item, a pair of pink stripper heels, to attack him. They wrapped tightly and quickly around his feet. The corruption slithered up his legs transforming him. Within seconds he had changed into a beautiful babe with big tits and blonde hair. Any conflict in his face melted away into an evil smile.
“Alan? No dude you have to fight it!” One of the other men implored to the new beauty.
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“It’s Amber now worm, and why would I fight perfection. Don’t worry Queen Lilith will make you see our way.” The new bitch purred as a pair of earrings flew onto one of the other men. Amber giggled as she watched the man spasm as his body became feminine and beautiful.
Without the boxes to protect them, the men fell one by one to the wicked corruption of Lilith who felt her power increase with each new man she transformed. She could hear their voices in her head and she had full control over them. It was a little overwhelming at first but became more pleasurable as the seconds ticked on.
Abby however used her daughter's distracted mind to quickly slip out of the room unnoticed. Abby had been on the other end of this situation before and knew that Lilith would soon be unsatisfied with her power and would demand more and no one knew more than Abby.
With one last lingering look at her corrupted daughter, Abby vowed to save her family. Meanwhile outside in the dark night, the 'A' on the ominous building changed to an 'L'.
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inkskinned · 1 year
Text
im gonna start a fight; and, at the same time, i need you to take this in the most good-faith way possible, but:
videos that involve body-checking and intentionally (and uncritically) show a mealplan of an unhealthy number of calories are just a revamped version of pro-ana food diaries.
and yeah, i know there's arguments. i address some of them under the cut. but at the end of the day, we're just coming back to romanticizing mental illness; we've just found a better platform for it.
this is already something we've done. we knew it was wrong and tried to stop it. and tbh. it just wasn't enough.
there are people who argue "well, what if you have an eating disorder, you can't help it if you don't eat!" except that as someone with an ED; we are not infants. we know what we're doing. part of having an ED is that you are like, maybe too self-aware. even if we can't help our own food choices, we don't need to fucking romanticize the disorder - something we've been warning you about since 2013. there are hours of setup, filming, and editing that go into these videos. they do not happen to fall into place randomly. there is a reason they are pieced together to be beautiful, bright, inspiring.
there's this woman who pretty much only posts daily plans under a normal amount of calories, and everyone defends her saying but it's better than nothing! and i'm like. except she opens those with images of her showing off her body and provides no context in the video or caption that suggests that she believes what she's doing is unhealthy. she has hundreds of thousands of followers on a platform designed for young kids and teens. i refuse to believe that by accident her content just happens to be cheery advice on "healthy" versions of starving.
for any other symptom of mental illness, we would be incredibly enraged by this kind of placid acceptance of a "tips and tricks" fast-start guide. imagine if people posted pink & pretty videos saying "best places to cut yourself" as if it was a fucking storytime. we, as a society, are so fucking fatphobic that we would rather accept blatantly harmful displays of self harm than admit that we are obsessed with a hyper-thin body type.
i am not suggesting someone never talks about their disorder. i talk about mine. actually, it's a plot point in my book.
here's the difference: i recognize it's a fucking mental illness. i am very careful to never mention a specific weight, eating pattern, or calorie plan. i always make sure to position it as something that ruined my fucking life. i do not put cheery music in the background and hearts and sparkles over my worst moments. i do not film it in bright light. i do not start each passage with an image of a thin body followed by "here's how to look like her."
eating disorders should not be framed as aspirational. and the problem is that society worships the "after" image, so long as you don't get too sick. there is a reason so many people who quit being "influencers" will later admit - i wasn't eating well that whole time; an obsession with food was completely destroying my life.
we let any uncredited, uncertified person write the most backwards, fucked up shit about how to get the body you desire! because the underlying, secret belief is: well, at least they're thin! and the real thing that fucking gets me each time - they make fucking money off of it. their irresponsibility and societal harm literally pays off for them.
"why do you care so much." "don't like it don't look." "so what if people experiment with new ways of thinking of food?"
thank you for asking. we're about to get extremely personal. it's because when i was 18 i discovered "thinspiration"/"thinspo." and it absolutely influenced, shaped, and codified my pre-existing eating disorder. i went from having some troubling habits and traits to being incredibly unwell within what felt like a matter of days. there were actual pages designed to train me on how to have an ED correctly. it was all so suddenly easy. i was sick; and the nature of the illness meant - i wanted to be sicker.
it takes an average of 7 years for a person to fully recover. i know this personally - even now, 10 years from the worst of it, i still fucking struggle. i am so much happier now and i eat what i want and i literally don't think about food at all (19 year old me would shudder) and yet - i still fucking know the calories of plain toast with butter.
an eating disorder is one of the deadliest types of mental illness. over 1 in 4 people with an ED will attempt suicide.
and i'm sorry. i just do not see the exchange rate of "high rate of engagement" versus "the value of a human life."
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lovezbrownies · 4 months
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Hide and Seek. (Yandere Queen x GN!Reader.)
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Masterlist
Synopsis: First you hid from the queen, as she seeked. Then you both hide as the queen's assistant seeks you two.
Queen Nia x GN!Reader
Warnings: Panicking, oveethinking, interruptions, heavily suggestive at the very end. MDNI.
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She felt crazy. Nia couldn’t find you anywhere! And she kept going in circles! She’d search the entirety of Khas, then she’d think “What if they went into one of the rooms I just left?” And search all over again. It’s been two hours and she’s starting to get depressed, are you hiding away from her? Did she do something to upset you? You should know by now Nia doesn’t mean to upset you, she just doesn’t know how to talk normally. Please please please pleas– “Ah! Hannah!!” Nia caught sight of her favored assistant, she literally did everything for her, she barely works with Hannah there.
Hannah turned to see her queen, bowing softly as she looked down at Nia, clipboard in hand.Queen Nia let out a tired breath, “Have you seen my loved one? I’ve been searching all over the place and I cannot for the life of me find them!” A frown was on Nia’s face, her arms crossed, her foot tapping impatiently against the marble floors. 
“Ah they’re at the park with the ducks at the moment.” Hannah stated plainly.
Nia scoffed, “We don’t have a park or ducks in the palace, silly!”
Hannah rolled her eyes, well obviously. “Why yes, we don’t. I let them go out to a recently opened park somewhere near the palace.” Nia gasped, no way she let you go out! And Nia thought Hannah was smart but since hearing this her outlook on Hannah is completely different. Oh goodness, her poor darling is probably distraught, oh my what if you were getting hit on? What if some random person strikes a small conversation with you?! Oh heavens! “Well, where is this so-called park! I need to save my darling from idle chit-chat!”
A smirk came across Hannah’s face, this all was revenge, because the day before Nia had called one of Hannah’s new ideas stupid and she did not take kindly to that. So, Hannah took you out to the aforementioned park. Spoke with you for a while, what a delightful person you are, and then went back to the palace, anticipating Nia to immediately bombard her with questions of where you currently were. Now this is the part where she finally gets her sweet revenge. “Well, my queen, don’t be so rash! You’re still 28, you cannot possibly show your face to the public now can you? Maybe have some faith in your love and let them come back on their own!”
Queen Nia huffed, stomping away to her room. Nothing is going to stop her today! She will save you from the dreaded short awkward conversations you always complain of! Who is she, as your wife, if she won’t sacrifice her dignity for you! Picking up the old cloak, the same one she used to go and see you before she married you. And went through that old passage she used to take to sneak out and see you. Now. She only has to find that pesky park! Although scared, she will persevere to save her spouse!
But thankfully, as soon as she stepped off the ladder to the outside world she bumped into someone she couldn’t see due to the hood that is hiding her face, Nia scoffed loudly. They spoke up, “S-sor- Wait, Nia? Is that you?” Nia froze, pulling the hood off she saw her angel! How independent you are! Her sweet dove! “Ah my darling! I was so worried that someone had forced you to chit-chat with them, but it seems like you already had given them a piece of your mind and moved on, right?” You were still so confused, she allowed you to go out after all, or that’s what Hannah had told you before accompanying you to that park.
You enjoyed your time, Hannah gave you some bird seed to feed the ducks and spoke with you for a while before going back. You tried to avoid other people, you didn’t like to speak to strangers at all, but you did meet this guy who you had bonded with over feeding the cute ducks. It doesn’t matter who they were since you didn’t share contact information. “What? Nia what? Didn-'' Nia gasped, suddenly realizing where you two are.
“Oh dear! Let’s get back to our room, or else the guards might hear us! Don’t want to get another lecture from the Chief of Police again now do we?” Nia grabbed your wrist and pulled you towards the ladder, “Come, let’s continue this in our room, I want to hear every detail of your amazing bravery!” Pushing you towards the ladder she motioned you to go first, even trying to pick you up and help you up but alas she’s still far too short and weak.
Once you two finally reached your shared bedroom, Nia launched herself onto her bed, twisting her body over to where you were sitting, a reading chair next to a big bookshelf, her head on her hands, she smiled widely, waiting for your amazing adventurous story. “Well, my love, do go on!” You sigh, drinking up a cup of water you opened your mouth, ready to speak your mind. “So the duck-” A knock interrupted you before you could even begin. Maybe this palace was cursed. You can barely speak a word in this palace without being cut off.
Nia jumped up, pulling you up from the chair she pushed you into the bathroom, gesturing at you to stay quiet. As she closed the bathroom door, the door to the bedroom opened, someone called out, “My queen?” It was Hannah. Nia could barely hold her giggles, she took you by the hand, whispering in your ear, “Stay quiet, but go lay down in the bathtub.”
You nodded, doing as you’re told, this was a little fun you must admit. Nia has her quirks but she makes life fun to live in. She stepped behind the tub’s curtains, closing them slowly so as to not create any noise. Even though there was enough space in the big bathtub for her to lay beside you she decided to just lie down on top of you, cuddling into you, almost purring at how nice you smell.
You heard the closet doors opening and closing, Hannah’s footsteps getting closer and closer, while you were focused on not getting caught Nia was focused on getting your attention back. Huffing as she saw you eye at the curtains, you weren’t looking at her! And that was something she decided to change, she began rubbing parts of your body as sensually as she can, you looked down at Nia, a devious smile on her face. “Nia wha-” Nia shushed you, “Stay quiet, don’t wanna get caught getting steamy in front of Hannah.” 
Just as she says this one of her hands made its way down to your crotch, she rubbed your crotch harshly once and then tiny feathery touches here and there, you squeaked as she played with you through your clothes. You slammed your hand against your mouth when you heard the bathroom door clicking open. “Nia? Are you here?” Hearing that Hannah had finally come into the bathroom Nia grabbed and rubbed at your crotch harsher than she did before, making it hard not to let out the lewdest of moans.
The evil queen had suddenly stopped, leaving you needy, softly thrusting up to her hand, wanting more. Nia, still grinning wildly, shook her head in disagreement. As soon as Hannah sighed in exasperation and you both heard the bedroom door closed, Nia immediately went back to work, leaving you a mess in the bathtub. Nia sat up, straddling your lap, she reached over and turned on the water nozzle. “Whoops, looks like we gotta take off our clothes and shower together~” You two spent a long while in that tub.
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And all the pieces fall, right into place // Part One
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So Feyd Rautha is still on my mind and that’s my second try of writing about him and an Artreides!Reader.
This will get smutty later on, but not in this chapter.
Summary: As the Princess of House Atreides, you don’t shy away from what ever must be done for your family. Your impending union with a Harkonnen, though anticipated, doesn't unsettle you. However, the events take an unforeseen twist, placing your fate on a precarious edge. This sudden shift brings about consequences far beyond what you could have ever envisioned.
English is not my first language.
All feedback is welcome <3
Part two // Part Three
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There are so many songs that make me think of our favorite psychotic Harkonnen, but I stick with „Found“ by ††† (Crosses) for now.
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Na Baron Feyd Rautha x Atreides!Reader
FxM
1.349 words
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The dim light wandered through the corridor, veiling most of the space into a velvety dark. The earthy brown and green tapestry on the wall illumined ever so slightly by the flowing arms along the wall. But even if there would be no light, you know the way by heart, having followed it more times than you can remember. Your feet shuffled along the floor, finally stopping at a closed door almost hidden at the end of the passage. Before your knuckles can touch the polished wood, a slight gap appears.
„You are late“ Paul says, and pulls you in, closing the door behind you at once.
„Well, you can take it up with our Father. I love him with all my heart, but with him being in the library for so long there was no chance of getting past him earlier“ 
„He seems to spend an awful amount of time there nowadays“ Paul muses and lets himself fall on a cushion on the floor. 
„That’s true. I believe he hides from Mother.“
Both of you cannot suppress a laugh. Since Lady Jessica is with child she seems quite easily irritated with everyone, especially with the Duke. 
„Well, at least she will have a new baby to take care of when we are gone“ 
„Let's drink to that“ Paul says, and produces a bottle of wine and two glasses from a cupboard. 
The liquid is the perfect ruby color, reflecting the light on the walls. It feels like all of your home planet has been distilled into the glass in your hand: the sweetness of the sunshine rays, the vibrancy of the hills covered in forests, the deepness of mountain lakes you wandered with Paul & Duncan, the acidity of the soreness after training with Gurney and the light twinge of bitterness of the goodbyes Paul and you were to say so soon. 
„We have about a fortnight still“ he says, as if reading your mind. 
„How about you stay out of my thoughts, “ you reply, but there is no sharpness to it. He is right, your future is about to unfold, but now you are here still, far away from the harsh and unforgiving Giedi Prime where the man you were promised to awaits.
„I really should go there and tell them off“ Your father sighs, his eyes still resting on the book he has had for half an hour without reading a single word. 
„And what good would it do? Let them, they will need the memories to sustain them through what’s to come“ Lady Jessica says with a benevolent smile. 
Her hand rests on her belly, instantly protective of the new life. But she feels the same unease as the Duke, with hints of trouble in the air being almost tangible to her. 
_______
You regret the last cup when you wake up the next morning. Your mouth feels dry and ashy, your head throbbing. Your handmaidens say nothing, but a vial with medicine is placed wordlessly on your nightstand. You gulp it down and rush to the private dining room, where your mother and Paul are already there. 
A servant plates some bread on your plate but is dismissed by Lady Jessica with a stern look. 
„No, please. Not now“ you whine „ We practised for so much already“ 
Lady Jessicas looks at you sternly „And yet there is a need for more“.
Your eyes wander to your brother 
„Don’t look at me for help. I had earned my breakfast already“
With a sigh, you sit upright and focus on your mother
„Give me the plate“
Like in a trance, her hands move as she grabs the plate from the servants' hands and puts it next to you. 
„Good, now what else do you want?“ 
_______
Days pass by in training, between the library and the combat space, with afternoons free for you and Paul to do as you please. To sit at the cliff just outside your ancestral fortress, with seagulls rushing over your head, while you look at the waves crashing at the shore is something you cannot believe to be able to leave without. The hours spent in comfortable silence are so precious to you that you almost can’t find back the tears prickling in your eyes. A servant comes running to you one of those afternoons, visibly distressed. 
„My Lord, my Lady“ he finally gets out between snapping for air „You are requested at the guest hall at once. Please come“ Paul and you get up, exchanging a glance. In the hall, the fireplace is lit and everything is a buzz with servants carrying silver plates, candles and chairs. Your father stands next to the fire, his hands clasped behind his back with the message scroll he holds so tightly his knuckles are almost white. He turns around, and his expression is carefully neutral.
„There has been news for you today, my children. Paul, you are to leave for Arraki with me in a week. We will meet the Fremen delegation there and your wedding is to take place in Arrakeen. You, my daughter, however, will be gathered by Baron Vladimir Harkonnen and Na Baron Feyd Rautha here. Baron Vladimir and his nephews will arrive the day after tomorrow. They will take you to Giedi Prime after the wedding“ 
Paul seems as confused as you are. You were to travel as a family to Giedi Prime so that your wedding could commence after Na Baron's Birthday celebrations. But now he and his family make the effort and spice to travel to your home. This news leaves you puzzled and unsettled. „Now go to Lady Jessica at once“ he says and with a bow of your head, you rush to her chambers. 
Lady Jessica seems calm, compared to you. But she has years of Bene Desserts training that you are yet to acquire. She holds out her hands to both of you. „Something is not right“ she admits, „but there is nothing to gain in worrying now. We have too much to do“ 
And with this, your packing begins.
_____
Metal plate touches the ground with a soft thud, revealing a row of Harkonnens soldiers, all in their full combat gear, looking out of place in the middle of the green field their vessel landed on. „Quite a show“ Paul signs to you and gets a „Behave now“ as a reaction from your mother. 
They march in unison and behind them a grotesque floating figure is revealed, followed by multiple tubes, connected to dark glass orbs. Baron Vladimir Harkonnen floats, with his drape touching the ground and collecting the morning dew on the edges of it. His face is soft and plump but also full of hardness, small eyes beading at you with a hostility you cannot understand. Glossu Rabban, a mountain of muscle, follows slightly behind him, glancing between your family and the surroundings. Light breeze reaches you, carrying the smell of the sea foam and shells and raising the banners of your House behind you even higher. You lift your chin a bit, trying to mirror it and your gaze falls on the man next to Glossu. His skin is so fair that it looks like snow on a mountaintop, unblemished and almost sparkling. His uniform is tight, with black leather at his shoulders, knees and boots, which only makes his skin more striking. You are aware of his reputation, so his calm pace doesn’t fool you. Behind this facade of tranquillity is a person who is rumored to be the most ruthless soldier in the known universe. His eyes seem to look straight at your parents when suddenly his head turns to you and his dark blue eyes meet yours. For a split second, the corner of your mouth twitches nervously and he catches that, causing a hint of a smile on his face. He doesn’t look away as if to test you, so you try to withhold his gaze with the same amount of pride. His lips form a proper smile now, with the promise of a story yet to begin.
________
to be continued ...
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breelandwalker · 1 year
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Oh for fuck's sake, are we having the curse-shaming argument AGAIN??? Every time I think we're done unteaching this nonsense.....
Arright, quick rundown of the points, more or less in order, because I've already had this discussion a hundred times:
One - There is no universal moral or ethical code in witchcraft. Not every witch is a Wiccan or follows Wiccan principles. Not even all Wiccans follow every Wiccan principle, and that includes the Rule of Three / Threefold Law. The Wiccan Rede is ADVICE, not a set of hard and fast rules or divine mandates. You don't get to tell other witches what types of spells they should and should not cast.
Two - If you think the Rule of Three / Threefold Law means, "Whatever you give out comes back to you times three" or if you think it only applies to baneful magic, you don't understand the rule. The original rule, as stated by Robert Graves in "The White Goddess" (you know, the fictional novel that Gardner used as a model for Wicca) states that whatever a witch is dealt, they should deal back three times over. In fact, the passage cites a particular initiation ritual that involves symbolic flagellation, NOT a code of ethics for witchcraft.
It was picked up by later authors as "Whatever You Give" and popularized by media like The Craft and Charmed and authors like Silver Ravenwolf in the 90s when the modern witchcraft movement was having its' millennial boom. (This is a gross oversimplification, but that's when the concept became common enough in pop culture that non-witches were starting to become familiar with the term.)
Three - Karma has absolutely nothing to do with it. Karma is not instant or sentient and the bastardized version of the concept that's been worked into much of modern witchcraft literature more closely resembles the Christian concept of sin and judgment than what karma actually is. Remove the word from your vocabulary when you're talking about magic. The universe does not give one single flying fuck what you do with your spells.
Four - The word you're searching for when you talk about these concepts is CONSEQUENCES. Every action you take, every spell you cast, everything has consequences and everything has a price. This isn't a divine mandate or a cosmic law either. It's a simple fact of life. BUT. It doesn't mean that baneful spells are morally or ethically wrong or that they're going to blow up in someone's face. The only reason a baneful spell might be more likely to rebound is that it's one of the only types of spells that witches actively ward against.
Five - Witches have a right to use magic for persuasion, defense, justice, retribution, binding, prevention, or outright harm if they so choose. If you don't like those types of spells, then don't cast them.
Six - Moral puritanism is a cancer that will destroy us all. Get off your high horse, drop the holier-than-thou bullshit, and remember that being a witch does not make you immune to propaganda.
Thank you for coming to my Toad Talk.
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del-thetiredwriter · 1 year
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Mafia au/Good luck while running away from mafia
intro , part 0.5 , part 1 , part 3
Notes: Hello its been a while . First of all its little longer ususal but I hope you like it. And because of some health issues and some personal stuff I couldnt post anything. I'll try to post whever I have time.
Tags: @morokumi , @hrhqueenfox , @hasty-desert , @oceanside-pixie , @lianreine ,@h3apm3ch4n151m, @cecilebutcher, @ayachansan
Warning: my poor English, gn reader, fight scenes , running away from yandere ...
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As you did the paperwork that Leona should have done but didn't, your eye fell on Leona's phone. Someone has been texting nonstop for the last 15 minutes. Whoever texted finally called. It was Vil. You took the phone to Leona. Disturbed by his sleep interruption, the executive of Savanaclaw answered the call and gestured for you to leave. You thought 'weird'. Meeting of executives who don't like each other to death.
"Leona-san, is there a problem sir? May I ask why Vil-san called you?" you asked. "It's not a big deal. You don't need to know."
"Is that so."
-
You gripped the steering wheel tightly. Your hands were shaking with adrenaline because of that fight at the restaurant an hour ago. They found you. Of course they did, but you were so used to your life in this last 1 month that you were taken by surprise for a moment. You should have cleared your mind now. Heartslabyul had already attacked. You could be attacked at any time. You should have been on the alert.
"Well, Y/N pack yourself up. You know them, they know you. There must be a way out. They probably have their men stationed at all the entrances and exits of the city. So it's almost impossible to get out of here without getting caught." you thought.
You opened the glove box. The situation was dire. Since you came to work with Alex this morning, you forgot that you 'cleaned' the car. "Damn" you cursed. All you had now were 3 bullets, a gun , an electroshock device, two morning sandwiches and some cash.It didn't seem like enough for an escape at all. 'I could have gone home and stocked up on some supplies and ammo, but since they found my work place, they probably found the house too. ' you thought. Your thoughts were interrupted by the vibration from your phone. The alarm of the security system you installed in your house was going on. When you looked at the cameras you saw 3 familiar face. You'll recognize those green predatory eyes wherever you see them. "Leona-san."
-
"Looks like the little herbivore has put some little toys in here, huh. Ruggie, turn those alarms off, they're too loud." said Leona as he surveyed the house.
"Leona-san, I told you to sneak in. It was obvious that someone like Y/N-shii was going to install a security system in the house. Now we've cleared our spot." Ruggie whined as he searched for the shutdown system. "Leona-san, what are you trying to do, sir?" ' Jack asked the reclining department manager. " Don't worry , They will come." said Leona lazily. "After all, they have no choice ."
-
"I don't have a better option than this." you sighed.
According to the cameras around the house, there were no men around. You did not know the position of the other executives. But looking at all your years in the mafia, one of the things you knew was that departments weren't going to work together to catch you. Leona was trying to get you on your feet by knowing your current situation, and it seemed like it was the best choice.
You checked inside the cameras one last time. Ruggie and Leona were in the Hall at the entrance, while Jack stood guard in the garage. "Damn, I wish I had a secret passage to the house." you said. Getting Jack first seemed like the best option to get in. "I'm on my really unlucky day… against two different departments in one night, huh."
-
Jack was lost in thought. He was thinking of you as he paced the garage. A month and a half ago, he suddenly couldn't reach you, then found out that you had left the mafia. Why did you leave, what was your reason? Why didn't you say anything to him? Jack felt betrayed. He paused with a small click. The garage door was slightly ajar. You jumped on him before he knew what was going on. You attacked him before he could come to him because of the blow he received and you used the electroshock device. "Sorry Jack." you said while tying it. "But while hunting, always pay attention to the hunt, otherwise you will be the hunted while you are the hunter." you said. Those were the words he said to you when you first went on a mission with Leona. You took the remaining strings and took one last look at Jack and locked the door on him.
-
"Ah~ all the hustle and bustle made me pretty hungry." said Ruggie, taking a bite of the donut he found in the fridge. "But you have to give it credit. Y/N-shii really tried hard. Security systems, cameras. soundproof walls… Who knows what else is in here , right Leona-san?" ' Ruggie asked the man lying in the armchair a few feet away. But the only response that came was a vague grunt. "Oh really, I'm going to Jack's. Call me if you need anything."
Ruggie began muttering to himself as he made his way down the hall. "This soundproofing thing really sucks. I feel like I'm in a horror movie." When he finally reached the garage door, he paused. There was something amiss. The door was locked. "Jack?" 'Oh no!' and with a sharp blow his vision darkened.
'I am indebted to the awful assassination training I received in Pormefiore.' you thought as you tied Ruggie. If Rook saw you in this state, he would surely utter some French nonsense and cry out of delight.
'last hunt' you thought. You had no chance to surprise attack this time, the fight was inevitable.
"You came." said Leona, his back to you as he sat on the sofa. He slowly turned his face towards you and grinned like a hunter playing with his prey. You pointed your gun at him. "Ah~ really, how cold you are. But I wouldn't do that if I were you." he said You looked at the table in the middle of the sofa set, Leona had found all your ammo. Then suddenly he stood up. "Don't you dare do anything wrong, otherwise-" "What," he interrupted. "Are you going to shoot me?" You didn't reply. "You know, I've been thinking a lot about why you left the mafia." He took a step towards you. "After all, you suddenly disappeared without any of us knowing. It was okay, we were very close." He took two more steps. "Don't Approach!" you warned. "Then why? You either wanted a normal life or -" "I said don't Approach !" and you pulled the trigger. Leona fell to the ground with the blow. First a few seconds of deep silence, then a chilling laugh. "Do you really think I'm not prepared for such situations?" he said. Before you could take your guard on, he made a move towards your gun and your gun fell to the ground. "Things might be more comfortable for you if you surrendered easily." said Leona, like a parent scolding his child. You grabbed a knife from the kitchen counter, but Leona grabbed you by the wrists and prevented you from attacking.
"You were supposed to behave yourself when you realized everything. Not running away stupidly." he said, tightening his grip.
You grit your teeth, You hit him in the face with your head. With this unexpected blow, Leona staggered backwards. With your freed hands, you took a handful of black pepper from the Black Pepper jar on the table and punched him in the face with your black pepper-filled fist. Roaring with pain from the dust in his eyes, Leona tried to attack you, but you got ahead of him and activated the booby traps. and Leona suddenly found himself in a ditch.
"You underestimated me, Leona-san. Remember, this is my territory. Even lions can be prey in the territory of the ridges when they are alone."
Without wasting any time, you started filling a bag with supplies and ammo. Meanwhile, Leona's phone started ringing. You picked up the phone on the table and saw the calling number,it was Boss.
"Hello Y/N, how are you?"
You didn't answer. Your old boss, Dire Crowley, was talking as usual as if nothing had happened.
"First of all, congratulations, defeating two of my managers in one night is not easy for everyone." You locked the door of the house while he was talking.
"You know, I'm a very generous person. That's why I wanted to let you know that the arrest warrant has been taken against you and that the whole mafia is after you." '
Oh, what a generosity. Like I didn't know this." you thought.
"But remember, I'm on your side. If you can escape from all, I'll give you your freedom."
"What if I Lose?"
"Then we both know what will happen." And the phone has turned off.
-
"Agh! I was so sure the Kingscholar would catch them." groaned former Savanaclaw manager Ashton Vargas. "But he didn't catch them. You've lost the bet so please let me demand the money." Sam smiled. "It was unexpected even for Y/N." said Trein, taking a sip of his tea. "Would you like to change your bets on who will win?" Sam offered. He grinned mischievously as he pocketed the check from Vargas. "The rightfully of what we're doing is debatable, but it looks like it'll be fun. A little fun never hurt anyone." said Crowley. While looking at Crewel, who is silently watching outside. "Okay, then let me take your bets."
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