#the secret. the secret that peter keeps locked within him. the secret he never shares or talks about. peter's secret. that secret.

[sciderman]

[scribble-dribble-writes]

Hi!💕

I was thinking about angst for Miguel. Like Miguel being in love with her since he first met her. But he wholeheartedly believes she only sees him as an friend (which maybe or maybe not be true depending on how you want it to go for Miguel) especially when he sees her happy and smiling with another man. I want to hurt but also want a good ending. Thank you ☺️

Thank you for the ask! I hope you like it 💖

---

Lost time

He pushed a doodle he had made towards you. You were seated next to him, helping him with sorting through the influx of data that had gathered from the various universes.

You took the small piece of paper to inspect it, a smile spreading across your face. It was a little sketch of you staring at the screens, with a sentence scribbled beneath it.

Don’t become like me :(

He didn’t know why he was a spider in the first place. He had spent years hating himself for it, for becoming like this. But in moments like these, moments were he too had hidden sketches of you, or when he joked just so he could hear your laugh. It made him believe that he was always meant to be spiderman or atleast he shared a few qualities with the other. It eased the voice of the critic in his head.

But as days went by, he had gone from observing you just because you were the only one he found interesting to never being able to look at anything else because he had fallen in love. That caused the self hatred within him to grow.

How can someone like you? Who lit up every room can be with someone like him.

A mutated monster that could never quite go back to who he once was. The humanness in him fading with every passing day.

He could never hold you close, his claws would get in the way.

He could never kiss you, his fangs would cut you.

And one moment he would be happy, then the next his eyes would narrow down on you like you were a threat.

So him yearning for love was as good as believing in fantasy.

You held him at a certain distance, he felt it, you would be around him long enough to thaw his heart and then flit back to the world you had come from. He watched you relax around other Peter parkers, to pull them into hugs or kiss their cheeks.

He only knew to sulk on that pedestal he built for himself, because if he just pretended to be a statue then his hurt would be left alone, frozen in time.

So he did the same now, push the paper away because if he held onto it, he’d want to frame it. The smile on your face soon becoming the highlight of his day as he sunk back into his chair.

You felt him pull away again. That was how it had been ever since you started being around him. You held the small piece of paper as though it was priceless, another great artefact that he bestowed on you, one you would take home to keep safe. Because as much as he believed he was this creature, these little gifts actually only reinstated how human he was.

You turned to look at him, to catch his eyes for a brief second before he looked away clearing his throat as though he had been caught admiring you. And you did, catch him often looking at you with dreamy eyes, it was only that you wished he would admit it to you, so then you didn’t have to pretend like you didn’t see him.

You saw him. All of him. His happiness, his sadness, his past, his present and the man he had once been, choosing to shine through the cracks now and then.

“Why do you hide it?”, it slipped out your mouth before you could hold it back. His eyes shot to you and you froze.

“Hide what?”, he asked as if you had uncovered his deepest secret.

But now it was out, now you needed to know.

“You.”, you smiled furrowing your brows because you couldn’t understand, why he kept his heart locked up.

He looked away, avoiding your gaze might help him think of a way to escape without giving you an answer but as his eyes found yours again. There was a part of him that didn’t want to shy away.

“There’s nothing great to share.”, he shrugged his shoulders but it made your smile disappear and he hated himself for it.

“Miguel.”, you said his name with a gentleness that you were sure he had not heard of before, you put away the paper to reach for his hand and you felt his fingers twitch upon your contact.

“Stop being hard on yourself.”, he heard you say and it stung him. He pulled away from your touch as though you had wounded him and the surprise on your face made him want to scream out because he had been yearning for your touch. Now he couldn’t even go after what he wanted. What he dreamed.

“There’s a reason as to why I am.”, he disguised the anguish with anger.

“Because of who you are?”, you question and he pushed away from his seat.

“Because of what I am.”, he quipped immediately, his eyes staying glued to yours as you finally saw the sadness behind his statement.

You pushed away to reach out for him, to pull him in, to confess that you loved him just as he was but he held his hands up in defense.

He began to break and it broke you, he mumbled all the reasons you should stay away.

“I could hurt you.”, he stepped back but you stepped forward.

“You deserve better.”, he was trying to convince you but instead it was the tears that were beginning to glimmer in his eyes that got you to stop.

His back hit the edge of the desk softly and it looked like he had admitted defeat.

“So you don’t want me to be around you?”, you asked softly and his eyes shot to find yours, his lips parting to disagree but instead he said,

“Ay dios. I want you. I need you.”, he stopped as he said it in a fit. The truth ebbing out his mouth as he saw you look at him with shock. You made him forget that his life had changed.

“As a friend, as a friend because that’s what we are.”, he held his hands up to ease you to then run his fingers through his hair as though he had messed up this connection between you and him.

But all you’ve been wanting was to know how he truly felt and now there was no need to pretend.

“That’s all we are?”, you asked him. Anxious that there was no room to be more.

“Yes.”, he said slowly.

“Nothing more?”, you stepped towards him as though you were stepping on thin ice.

He didn’t answer and it filled you with anger that he was ready to throw this away. That he wasn’t even going to take a chance.

“Just tell me never liked me and I can move on.”, you demanded and he pursed his lips.

“Tell me.”, you pushed forward, your face now in front of his.

But when his eyes found yours, it burned with passion. It burned as he took your hand. It sizzled as his eyes fell to your lips.

“Nunca.”, he whispered and you wanted to wriggle your hand out of his hold to march away but he didn’t let you.

“I could never imagine my life without you in it.”, he tugged you to him.

“If you had only let me know I had a chance, I would not have waited for so long.”, he said quietly, his eyes roaming over your face as his hand caressed your cheek.

“You’ve always had a chance, Miguel. You never took it.”, you placed your palms on his chest, not wanting to pull away from his arms.

“What are you going to do with this one?”, you asked as you were in this moment, your voice turning raspy when his breath cascaded over your lips.

He waited for a second, but there was nothing to think about. He pulled you to him entirely, his hands cradling your hips so you could wrap your legs around his waist. His lips catching yours with a hunger that matched yours. He moaned with delight as your fingers got lost in his hair.

He didn’t break away but he pushed away from the desk to turn and put you on it. He pinned you down as his hands caged you in, his kisses now traveling down your neck before he returned to your lips.

He pulled away to catch his breath and you couldn’t help but laugh as you were in a state of joy, his eyes softened as he joined you. You pushed yourself up and he held your waist steady, his eyes lost in yours as if he couldn’t make sense if this was real or not.

He leaned forward, to place his forehead on yours as he breathed slowly and before you knew it, you were breathing in sync with him.

“You like me as I am?”, he asked.

“I love you as you are.”, you replied and felt his hands tighten around you.

You nudged his nose with yours to get him to look at you and when he did,

“I love you, Miguel. I always have.”, you repeated it just so he knew you were not going to take it back.

His eyes glistened as he took your hand to kiss your palm as though a broken part of him had healed. He then began to place kisses on your wrist and worked his way down your arm as though his words could never convey the depth of his love. You slowly leaned back to lie down on the table as you pulled him close.

“We might be here for a while at this rate.”, he laughed and you smiled.

“Hmm we can make up for lost time.”, you chuckled.

“Oh I see.”, he said it with a mischievous tone, taunting you as his lips hovered over yours.

“Just shut up and kiss me.”, you laughed as you pulled him by the collar of his suit to kiss him again. His laugh against your lips put the world on hold for a while.

[thepaperpanda]

The Tarry Gift || Higgs Monaghan x Reader (yet Sam makes a short guest apperance too!)

Summary: it had to be a simple delivery after a longer time of being indisposed. Little did you know that the client was Higgs Monaghan himself

Warnings: none     

Words: 2728

Authors: Cass & Bear

A/N: This is a comedy fic. We wrote it accidentally while just playing around with writing a thing for Higgs Monaghan character but it came out so laughably that we decided to share it with you! ENJOY!

You hoped for a lot as for the first delivery since a long time but instead, you’d gotten pizza delivery. A fucking pizza.

You took the box and headed to the destination.

When the terminal beeped, Higgs narrowed his eyes. Quickly a realization came - it could be nothing but pizza! 

Oh, how much he hoped to finally meet Sam in his bunker! 

How much he craved to see Sam's face when he will realise that Peter Englert was no one else but Higgs himself!

Before putting his hood on, he checked his makeup and smiled at his reflection in a mirror. "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the meanest of them all?," He smirked widely to his reflection so the whiteness of his teeth glistened back in a light of lamp and Higgs chuckled.

He checked his outfit for the very last time and walked to open the door.

"Oh, Sam Bridges! Guess you're happy to..... Who the fuck are you?"

"Who the fuck are you?," You asked with a frown, still holding pizza box in your hands.

The last thing you needed now was being insulted by an aspiring beauty guru. "I have your pizza, mr Englert."

"Where's Sam Bridges?," He asked, measuring your features from the bottom to the top.

You shrugged. "He left before I did. Even if he is my friend I don't really know where he is. Why do you ask?"

"Nevermind. Oh, where are my manners? Please, come in, come in," he gestured at you to get inside the bunker.

"Uhm…," You felt confused, most of the time you interacted with holograms and no one ever invited you inside. "Uhm, I don't know if I should."

"Oh, don't bullshit me!," He simply grabbed your forearm and pulled you inside. When he did, the door closed automatically.

Now you felt scared as fuck and the locked door made you scared even more. "Uhm... Your pizza,” you passed the box to the man in the hood.

With his hood still on, Higgs grabbed the pizza box from you and humming happily he went further along the narrow corridor. "Oh, c'mon! Don't stand like an idiot. Get in!"

You swallowed heavily and nodded, following him. You didn't like it but you had no other option.

The corridor led to a huge chamber.

The walls were covered with handwriting, maps and pictures of no one else but Sam Bridges.

Almost in the middle of the room there was a couch and a table. Under the table there were empty pizza boxes.

Man flopped on the couch and opened the box he was holding in hands. He grabbed a slice of pizza and took a bite. He hummed. "Delicious. Make yourself at home. Want some?," He asked, offering you pizza. "Salami and ham."

You looked around and felt the shivers moving up your spine. This didn't look good and you wanted to run. "No, thanks… I don't like salami or pizza itself."

He shrugged. "Whatever you say, honeypot," he replied and ate his slice of pizza only to grab another

"Don't call me that. I don't even know you. Why am I here even?!," You growled angrily while rubbing your elbow.

"The name's Higgs, the particle of God that permeates all existence. You brought pizza and you are the friend of Sam Bridges who is my greatest enemy of all time. So technically, you're kidnapped," Higgs claimed.

You blinked, processing what he just said. "Excuse me...? You kidding, right? I wanna go out. Let me out."

"Take a seat and have some pizza. Rest. Make yourself at home. You're not going anywhere."

"I don't like pizza!," You growled. "I want to go home! I have other stuff to do."

"Shhh, shhh, shhh, stop talking, I can't gather my thoughts when you're yapping like a puppy," Higgs finished his pizza and laid on the couch.

"LET ME OUT YOU, PSYCHO!," You yelled and stomped a few times.

He didn't listen. After a long moment he got up and walked to the desk where a laptop was placed. He took it with him and sat back on the couch.

You frowned and moved closer to close the laptop with your palm. "Let me you! Do you understand English?"

"Can you stop yapping, pretty please?," He pulled the hood off his head and furrowed his brows.

"Can you stop being a dick and let me out?!," You growled. "Sam won't just come because I am gone."

"Oh, he'll. I'm mailing him, don't worry, he's going to come for you," Higgs replied. "If I was a dickhead, you'd be tied up and I'd put a rag into your mouth to shut you up. I didn't do anything. I even offered you pizza! Ah, people are so ungrateful these days."

"Says the guy that kidnapped an innocent woman. You want me to be grateful for keeping me here?," You asked in disbelief, crossing arms over your chest.

"Oh-ho, I heard the storm has come! It's better here I think, you're dry and not exposed to BTs. Or... Are you truly safe here?," He smirked wryly and snapped his fingers.

Without a blink of an eye the floor turned into tar and a creature formed out of it. It was a lion BT with a golden snout. It roared at you.

"Holy Beach!," You whimpered and sat on the couch right next to him, pulling knees right under your chin. "Take it away! I am sorry! I will be good!"

The lion tilted its head and shook its mane, roaring and yawning. Next, the creature licked its paw and sat right in front of you.

"Don't worry, it won't hurt you unless I order so," Higgs informed as he was writing the email.

You only nodded your head, too scared to even move or breathe.

"If you need a hug, you can just tell me," Higgs chuckled. "I'm a great cuddler."

Lion hit your knee with its paw, roaring.

"I would never touch you, ever. I am scared of this thing," you explained, pointing at the lion and whimpering loudly when it hit your knee.

"Don't you see? He demands being petted," Higgs glared at you. "Go on. Pet him. Like this," he reached out and stroked the mane made of tar.

You nodded and slowly tried to pet the lion how Higgs instructed you.

It resulted in a loud purring that was followed by a tail wiggling, sending some tar on the walls. Soon, the lion laid down, his belly exposed.

You looked at Higgs. "Really? I thought BTs are more scary," you said and bent down to scratch the lion's belly.

Lion's paw started shaking as you hit the very right spot. The puring became louder. 

Higgs raised his brow while looking at you. "Ah, right. They are scary, indeed. Just don't try this with others outside because they'll kill ya," he reminded. "Ah! Done! Now we only gotta wait for Sam to come and rescue you from the oppression!"

"You think I am that stupid to pet every BT I see?," You asked with a frown. "I don't think he will come but I at least can pet the lion..."

Lion grabbed your arm with both front paws and pulled you to him more so you fell off the couch. 

Higgs chuckled. "I forgot to tell you that he is too demanding sometimes."

"I can see! I will need a shower… Ah, I just took one before I left the facility," You sighed sadly, petting the lion.

Lion opened the snout and trailed its tarry tongue across your face.

You only whimpered and sighed defeatedly.

Soon, the terminal beeped again.

"Your saviour has come apparently!," Higgs informed you excitedly and rubbed his hands together getting off the couch.

He walked to the main door of his bunker and put hood back on. He touched the touchpad on the wall and the door opened. "Ah, Sam Bridges! We can finally meet in person!"

Sam put the case he was holding in his hand down on the stone floor and cocked his brow. "Higgs. We do know each other."

"Yes! But technically you came here to meet Peter Englert. So?," He sent Sam  a wide grin.

Sam let out a sigh. "Higgs. I know you're Peter Englert. Now, can I get Y/N back?"

"Yes, please! I'd like to go home, even if I like the lion!," You yelled from the floor while you were still petting the creature. Too bad you couldn't keep it.

Sam narrowed his brows. "Excuse me, is she inside? How? What for?"

"I'll share a secret with you," Higgs put hands to Sam's shoulders and leaned forward to trace the tip of his tongue along Sam's cheek. "I let her in and she enjoyed our common time."

"Get off, man!," Sam pushed Higgs off and wiped his cheek with the top of his gloved palm. "Y/N! Move on!"

You rubbed the lion's snout. "I started to like you. I need to go now, you cute, little thing. Maybe we'll meet again and you won't eat me then!," You said to the creature and got up to quickly run to Sam. "Hi," you give him a smile as soon as you step out of Higgs' bunker.

Sam measured your figure from the bottom to the top with shock written on his face. "Were you fighting BTs? Did he do something to you?," Sam asked, pointing right on Higgs who instantly shook his head for no, raising his hands up.

“He locked me in his safe room and was rude to me but at least he let me pet his BT lion. It's messy as hell but I really loved it," you explained with excitation, looking at Higgs. "Too bad I can't have one."

Higgs sent you a grin and snapped his fingers once again. Within the blink of an eye once again a little puddle of tar appeared at the entrance and a little BT lion cub stepped out of it, meowing loudly.

"Omg, hi, little one!" You laughed and picked the creature gently up. "You are mine now."

"Hola, hola!," Sam raised his tone. "You're not going to take a BT with you. Put it back, now, I am not joking, Y/N. You won't get the BT from this deluded guy."

Higgs crossed arms over his chest. "Let her. This BT belongs to her now, you would have to chop the cord off."

"Exactly. It's mine," you looked at him with an innocent smile, hugging the cub.

The BT lion cub reached its tiny paw towards Sam, but the man immediately took a step back. "This is sick, ridiculous. What are you thinking, Y/N? That we'll get back to Bridges with that BT hidden in your backpack? And you," Sam pointed at Higgs. He was so done with Monaghan's actions and shady plans. "You better get the fuck out of my sigh, I'm so done and believe me - I would kill you but I know it won't affect you in any goddamn way."

Higgs chuckled. "It's good to be a repatriate after all, huh? Y/N, you can keep the BT," he winked at you.

"What's the fucking point of kidnapping her though," Sam pointed at you, "When you simply let her go? What the fuck is going on!"

You pet the cub and shrugged. "He was really disappointed when I came with pizza. So if I understood it correctly, he didn't plan to hurt me and only wanted to get your attention."

You moved a little closer to Sam. "Trust me, he must be a big fan of yours. His walls are decorated with your pictures," you whispered.

Sam cringed at the simple thought of his photos being attached to Higgs' walls. 

"I planned on killing you," Higgs claimed openly. "But she came instead of you, and she brought a good pizza. So I rethought my idea and today I won't kill anyone. What a lovely day, isn't it?!"

Higgs approached you and Sam and wrapped his slender arms around you two. "What a lovely day for the encounter!"

You cringed at the hug, knowing that Sam must have felt really uncomfortable with this.

Letting out an awkward laugh you patted Higgs' shoulder. "Yes, yes... It's nice but please, can you let us go?"

Monaghan measured your features with his steel blue eyes. "It's a shame such a beautiful woman is wasting her youth on being a porter though," he touched your cheek with a gloved hand and then leaned down and forward to get on the level of your head. "But due to the fact you were rather a good hostage, I'll let ya go," after these words he licked your cheek. "You taste so good."

Sam cringed harder at the sight and simply yanked you out of Higgs' grasp. "I have enough of you, I mean it," Sam told Monaghan who only chuckled. "What's so funny, Higgs? Maybe it's time to get a life, something?"

Higgs rubbed his bearded chin before replying. "You see, Sam, haunting you and turning your life in a fucking mess became one of the most beloved and fascinating hobbies of mine lately," Higgs concluded with a happy tone. "You're so much fun, aren't you? Especially when you're making all those grimaces of yours when I cause the tar being all over you," Higgs summed up.

Sam closed his eyes for a brief moment, trying to cool himself down. "Amelie created a goddamn psychotic monster," he summed up, his hands clenched in fists.

"Sam, let's go, okay? You two can fight some other time. If he lets us go, let's use it," you said, petting the little lion in your arms and starting to walk away. "Thank you for the lion!"

"The pleasure is mine and mine only, Y/N, it's a pleasure to meet you though. Remember, the name's Higgs!"

Sam dragged you down the hill, right to his car. "Are you insane?"

"Hey! He kidnapped me, did you forget? Okay, maybe more like inviting me inside and locked the door but I felt kidnapped!," You stated. "And since when do you touch anyone?!"

"Since you pissed me off with the childish behaviour of yours, Y/N, he could have killed you."

"Like you see he did not! Overall he was even nice to me. He gave me a little lion!"

Sam let go of your hand. "Don't get fooled by his sweet face," Sam raised his finger up, shaking it in front of your eyes. "He might look cute and behave cute but it's his deluded facade. He's a fucking delusional psychopath who gifted you with the fucking BT. It's nothing normal in this."

"But look. It's my BT now, it won't hurt me or anyone. It will be okay," you said and nodded. "I know but look, he didn't hurt me and I am fine."

"So maybe get back to his bunker and you two can live a happy life, how about that?," Sam growled. "Get in. Time to get back to Bridges as you spent more than half a day with the main terrorist of America."

"I was kidnapped! It's not like I could just leave. You also took your sweet time to get there," you let out a sigh and got in, rolling your eyes.

"I was working and getting throughout BTs territory to get your ass saved, Y/N, so don't bullshit me about me being delayed," he instructed as he took a seat at the wheel.

"Okay, sorry.”

"Ah, and put this fucking thing to the trunk, I don't need the upholstery to be covered in tar," added Sam while pointing at BT lion cub that was on your lap.

"It's connected to me. If the cub is going to the trunk then I go there as well," you answered, petting BT head.

"For fuck's sake. If your sweet tar cub will leave a single tar spot inside, I'll cut the cord, understood?," Sam growled

You rolled your eyes and looked away.

"And please, next time refrain from delivering pizza."

"Not my fault that this is what I get to do. You know that it's not my choice," you sighed looking out of the window.

Sam only nodded in silence. "So at least try to verify to whom you are delivering."

[oingo233]

Rapture is a Boy (3)

Summary: Remus and you have always had a playful, loving relationship but his behavior around the full moon leads you to assume the worst. A huge fight ends with the two of you heartbroken. Will Remus reveal the truth behind his behavior?  And will you still love him afterwards or has he truly lost you forever?

Young Remus Lupin x Reader

Warning: angst, cuss words, self-doubt, angst, cheating, angst (but not as much as there will be later mwhahaha)  

Authors note: I try to keep my writing(self inserts) gender, body type, ethnicity and house neutral/not specified.  If I ever slip up please let me know so that I can change it.

Part One - Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five - Part Six - Part Seven - Part Eight

Word Count: 3k

                                                     Part Three

                           ****After All This Time, There is No Love****

The common room walls seemed to pulse with the vibrations of the song, every ear in the room being invaded with music, cheers, laughter, and somewhere for some odd reason, screaming.  Screams of joy of course. The party was alive and everyone had large smiles and butterbeer slipping through giggles or being shared through a kiss. This party would surely be talked about in the weeks to come.

But I was having a harder time of letting loose, and it would seem Lily is too.  For our very reason for throwing the party could not make it, so what the hell was the point?  Remus was off studying, James was off studying, so we had no lips to lock with our own, no body to dance and grip to, no one to have fun with in the way we wanted to tonight.  Lily was sipping on a butterbeer, staring at the portrait with me, hoping they’d walk through.

“Ladies...” A hufflepuff named Paul collided into our sides, looping his arms around our shoulder.  Lily to his right, I to his left.  He was staring drunkenly at the portrait with us, his eyes going large and then small, as if he was searching for something. “What are we doing?” He chuckles to himself.

“I mmmeann seriousllyy, if-if you’re waiting for a snnog anny onne here will step up.  Lilyy that is, she’s sinngle. I’d snnog you though (y/n) but Remmuss might tear mee apart-a-apart me.” He slurs, leaning in close to my face. “Pre,’ He mutters to himself “pretty,” he laughs again and saunters off, swaying his hips to the music, declaring he’ll chug another jug of butterbeer. I look at Lily and she stares back at me, mouth open and my own fighting a smile. Before we know it, we’re cackling like the bunch of witches/wizards we are.

“This is the worst, mission failed! M’ sorry Remus couldn’t make it,” Lily says, huffing hair out of her drink.  The fire burning only brought out the red of her hair, she looked apart of the flame herself.  I see why James was in love with her, she got her wits, charm, beauty, and kindness. So why would he miss this time to be with her?  Does Peter really need the whole lot of them?  

“mmmh,” I agree wordlessly, “M’ sorry James couldn’t.” She sighs into her drink, cheeks burning and she looks up at me.

“Me too.” She mumbles. I’m taken aback to say the very least.  I was always just teasing, I mean I had a hunch sure, but for her to really admit it. Well, I’m not proud to say that I stood there like a daft cow for roughly 5 minutes before she groaned and bumped her shoulder into mine. Hiding her smile and embarrassment with a final swig of her drink.  

“I- you- James?” Is all I can seem to get out of me, shock makes ya useless it seems.  She nods slowly.

“Yes, I thought you knew already.” She shrugs, turning towards the raging crowd of drunk witches and wizards.  

“Well, yeah..” I shrug just as cooly and she laughs, pushing me with her arm again.

“Stop, you did not because Remus doesn’t know, and you tell him everything.” She points out, but soon regrets it as my smile grows wickedly large.

“(y/n)!” But I was already half way through the portrait, muttering to myself just loud enough for her to hear.

“Remus! Remus, I’ve got to tell Remus!” I’m laughing hysterically as she chases me through the corridors, our robes trailing behind us like a little sea of black rolling by our angles.

“No! Please, don't!” She yells after me, both of us out of breath by the time we reach the same corridor as the library.  “I’ll hex you...” She glares at me as we walk swiftly up to the library doors.  Now, of course I would never ever snitch such a thing to anyone.  This is Lily’s long kept secret and when I had my unrequited love for Remus she didn’t go blabbering it to him or anyone else, so of course I would return the favor of silence.  My plan was to simply lead her to James, where they can now confess their undying love for one another after the secrets already out.  But she didn’t know this.

“You won’t hex me Lily dear, you’re not that against James knowing.  Why don’t you tell Remus yourself, or better yet, James!’’ I exclaim, smiling to myself for my own genius.  God, Remus will be in more of a shock than I, all the boys will, no one more than James. She tilts her head in disappointment directed at me, we raise our hands and together we open the doors.

We are first greeted with an indifferent glance in our direction from Pince.  We smile at her and nod our heads in her direction, then walk slowly (as in I’m matching Lily’s pace which is practically the march of dread) to the table the marauders usually sit. The table has all of our names scratched into the bottom.

I wish Lily would walk faster because I was bouncing to see Remus, he quickly apologized to me once again for being dismissive and it led to quite the kiss (or two) and left us with some unfinished business.  We turned the corner of a large bookshelf and where we were expecting to see the boys, we instead saw no one at all.

“Where are they?” I ask Lily, she shrugs beside me, just as confused.  Though her shoulders are slumped with either relief or disappointment, from the look on her face I can tell it is a mix of both. “Come,” I say wrapping my arm around her shoulder, “They’re bound to be here somewhere, yeah?”  She mumbled back a yeah to me, and together we searched the entirety of the library.

But it was a waste of time.  Hardly anyone was there, and certainly not the loud (yes, even when they study) boys we came here for.

But we did find someone of interest, walking back along the corridors we found someone perched by the window, staring out towards the forbidden forest, towards the shrieking shack. Lucy. Lucy is girl by the window. She looked worried.

I swallowed my pride and my anger. It’s irrational, I told myself, my emotions talking, not fact. I did all of this just to take two step towards her and ask a simple question.  But the answer was anything but.

“Are you okay? And before you lie to us, you should know that we genuinely are good listeners and I like to think quite non-judgmental and-” Though I swallowed so much, I could not swallow my stress ranting, the one that spawns when I am put in uncomfortable situations, such as this one. A curse truly. But thankfully Lily cuts me off.

“Yes, so uhm... are you?” Lily asks.  Lucy doesn’t even turn to us, she bites her lip and continues to stare out the window.  We almost go to ask again, thinking she hadn’t heard us.  But she starts speaking, her gaze never leaving the shack before her.

“I guess it’s always good to talk about our problems,” She laughs to herself, “Remus tells me that, says bottling things up only make it worse.  I’m worried about him actually.  Remus, do you know hi-” Her words fall short as she turns around and sees the expression on my face.  Remus.  She is worried about Remus, my boyfriend.  Why was she worried? Why was he not in the library where he said he would be?  What does Lucy know that I do not? 

Why does she care about Remus enough to sit and stare out of a window for hours? I quickly came back the conclusion that Remus was lying to me, about where he was, and who he loves. He has been cheating on me.

I stager backwards and Lily grasps my hand in hers, giving it a squeeze. 

“Are you two friends?” She asks, without venom or even a quiver in her lip, but I felt like my world was crashing down. I was thankful she asked the question because I wouldn’t have been as composed.

“Yes, er- sort of, closer than friends actually” She smiles to herself like she just said the sweetest thing. But it was just another stab to the heart, another hand constricting my throat.  Not very convincing Lucy, I think to myself. Lily squeezes my hand again and goes to lead us away but Lucy begins to speak again.

“You’re (y/n) right?” She knows me. She knows me?  I nod numbly and Lily quickly says goodbye for us, and rushes us away. She partly carries me through the portrait, I trail lamely behind her, not able of thought. She trudges us up the stairs to her bed where she promptly lets me sit and breakdown.

“Lily...” I don’t get to finish the sentence before she pulls me in for a hug, I didn’t realize how hard I was crying until my sobs made our shoulders hit into one another. She hugs me tighter, running her hands through my hair.  Shhhsing me softly, and whispering sweet things in my ear.

“I love him, I love him so much,” I cry out, fisting her shirt in my hands. I think I feel her wipe away a tear of her own. God, I must be such a mess to make Lily herself cry. But I am a mess.  I feel as though my very home has been taken away from me.  This boy I gave my heart to, this boy I gave my very own body and love to, was giving it all to someone else.  I confided in him, I trusted him, hell I’d even die for him.  But he was playing me, he was using me. I have been loving a stranger.

“He doesn’t love me...”Is all I can mumble to myself again and again, rocking in Lily's embrace. We lay there until sleep takes us. None of the girls wake us up whether I belonged in Lily's bed or not, they noticed the way my face seemed blotchy and I was frowning in my sleep.  But more than that they saw the tired look in Lily’s expression, and the rage hidden deep within.

I woke up to the sound of rustling clothes, and parchment.  The sound of the girls dormitory coming alive, and everyone preparing for the schools day ahead.  I didn’t want to wake up.  I wanted to lie there until I grew the strength to face my worst fear.  Until I grew the confidence to walk out there, to love myself again when I felt anything other than beautiful or good. I felt disgusting, what was wrong with me that would make Remus feel the need to be with another?  No, I didn’t want to get up until I was healed, until time would reverse itself completely.

But nonetheless I got up, because Lily was worried and Lily was watching and Lily was there to hold my hand and reassure me that I was wonderful, and worthy of love.  That it was Remus.  My Remus.  Lucy’s Remus, it doesn’t matter.  I love him, I still do.  After all that happened, I wish love was something I could tear from me and leave behind, but it was at first a beautiful flower in my heart and now it is just a dead weed stuck in cracks.  I will never be able to get it out.

Lily silently sits me on the edge of the bed. She fixes my hair for me, and wipes at my cheeks, and gives me a tissue.  I blow into it, she throws it out.  She kisses my cheek and waits for me to get dressed.  

At last, we make our way through the sea of students and staff to the great hall.  The laughter of fellow students makes the lump in my throat all that much larger.  My hands begin to shake and so Lily holds it within her own.

“Look at me love,” She says, “Remus does not deserve ya after the shite he pulled.  Ya need to talk to him love, you need to break up with him yeah?  Feel the freedom in your new single life and get out there.  Paul said he’d snog ya, yeah?” I know she was trying to make me feel better, and it almost worked.  Almost.  But I was still very much in love with him, I don’t know if I can move on.  After knowing Remus so intimately, how could I?  Nonetheless I swallow my despair and nod slowly to her.  She lets go of my hands and we walk straight to the Gryffindor table.  Straight to the boys.

My heart swallowed itself whole when I caught sight of Remus.  He looked tired, exhausted even.  His skin pale, and he looked in pain.  The other boys didn’t look any more alive, but they were laughing with one another, though in a more sedated way.  Remus was in his own world, reading a muggle book I gave him a while ago.  He promised he’d tell me all about it and that we’d find a way to watch the muggle movies when we can.  We never will.

My sadness is suddenly replaced with an intense anger.  With rage and hurt I walk right up to the table, I stand behind Remus. The other boys look up at Lily and me with easy smiles, but they drop as they soon further dissect our appearance and with it our mood. Sirius goes to wolf whistle as if he was excited by the fact one of the boys were about to get hounded into, but Lily raises a hand and stops all sound at the boys part of the table.

I clear my throat.  He is still reading, he smiles to himself as he reaches a rather humorous part of the book.  

“Remus,” I call, my voice sickly sweet, it seems to shock Lily. She begins to walk back, not wanting to be in the middle of the spitfire.  But the boys seems to soak in the scene with amusement. Remus hums in response, and puts his thumb near the edge like he does when he is about to finish a line and then close the book, but I was above waiting now.

“Could you Remus, for 5 seconds perhaps give me more attention when I speak to you than some fucking book.  It’s like I’m talking to a godamn wall!’‘ I lose my temper near the end, and now half of the table was staring at us.  Remus doesn’t even bother to mark the page, he places the book down and whips around to me with wide eyes. The boys no longer looking humored at all, everyone is giving me odds looks.  I’ve never once acted this way with Remus, all our previous arguments were resolved rather quickly.

“Great,” I smile too big at him, then turn to the boys. Every word dripping sarcasm and fake calm. Remus only frowns more, his eyes darting across my face and than to Lily searching for an answer.

“Now, could you all leave us be or are you going to be obnoxious flies on said wall while I speak to my boyfriend for the little amount of time I have managed to grab his attention?” I grit out every word, as if fighting my anger, I did not mean to be so hurtful but I am very hurt myself.  Did the rest of boys know about Remus cheating?  Instead of leaving, they stare at me in shock, after some time of staring James goes to ask why I am being so rude but I cut him off.

“You know what?” My voice cracks, I am losing my resolve.  With every second I spend staring deeper into Remus’s eyes my anger fades into sadness.  A great sea of sadness.  “Never mind, I am being rude. All of you can continue to ignore me completely, Remus, my love,” My voice cracks once again and I will my anger to come back so that I may do what I have to next.  “You keep reading that book of yours and for the love of god don’t stop for anything, I mean don’t ever stop because what on earth could be of a more pressing matter?  And boys, keep your sweet asses locked in place because I do always forget how much of fucking arseholes the whole lot of you are!” Remus stands up abruptly and caresses my forearm, he wishes for us to talk somewhere more privately but I jump back at his touch.   

My lips curl up in a snarl “We’re over Remus!  You cheat!  You fucking liar!”  I yell loud enough for the whole of Gryffindor table to hear, my anger has run from me completely and now nothing is left but Remus’s eyes staring deep into mine.  

His eyes, as they well up with tears and dart around the room.  His eyes growing red and defensive at all the people looking back at him. His eyes meeting mine once more, his mouth falling open and closing again.  He goes to speak, but at last, I watch as he can’t hold the tears back anymore. He rubs aggressively at his eyes, and rushes out of the great hall.  His friends racing after him, not before Sirius shoots me a dirty look and James questions Lily with his eyes.  

And then it was done. The students begin to whisper behind hands and poke their fingers in our direction.  The great hall filling up once again with chatter and gossip, I feel the color drain from my face and every feeling I previously had becomes overtaken with grief.  It is over.  I have lost him.  After all this time, there is no love.

Lily catches me before I fall.  She is now the one to rush me through the doors of the great hall, but we are stopped short.  Stopped by the sound of horrible, horrible sobs and 3 boys trying their hardest to silence them.  To comfort him. No pain in that moment would come to compare to the miserable feeling I’d carry around after that night.  After seeing him lying there, body racked with sobs because of me.

Sirius looks up, he looks as though he is in pain as he bounces his leg and runs a hand through his hair.  He looks around, anywhere but his broken friend.  But then our eyes meet.  

He begins to walk over to us, Lily stands as my guard.  But nothing could protect me from the onslaught that is an angry Sirius Black...

Taglist:

@crazylokonugget @beyondprincess @1975weasley​  @goto-hi-this-is-my-brain@nicodoesntexist

[adenei]

Summer of Jily Week 4

It's week 4 for @efkgirldetective's Summer of Jily challenge! You sure did send me for a loop with this one, but I've managed to keep the one-shots turned multi chap story going!

This week's prompts: Picking Berries and "I know I kissed you before, but I didn't do it right."

Read on AO3

************

James didn’t sleep at all that night. He couldn’t stop thinking about the carnival. His thoughts shifted between being mad at Sirius for winning that damn prize and presenting it to Lily—that was his stupid, cheesy plan that his best mate had hijacked—and the Ferris wheel ride.

About saving your letters or waiting for you to ask me out?

How could he have been so thick? And how is it that he keeps royally mucking things up? He’d had the perfect opportunity to kiss Lily right there on the ride, but then it had to move again, and he’d gotten sidetracked at the feeling of flying on a muggle contraption.

Hadn’t he come along with the boys to crash the girls trip so he could spend more time with Lily? He’d devised the perfect opportunity to sweep her off her feet, and he swore to himself he would only ask her out if she made it blatantly obvious that she wanted him to. As much as it killed him, he’d rather not lose her friendship over pressing her one too many times.

But now, she had made it clear that she was waiting for him to make a move, and what does he do instead? Lets her walk away after the sunrise, hits her with a ball by the lake, and then avoids her throughout the entire carnival until their friends force them to share a compartment on that bloody ride.

He’d had the perfect opportunity to kiss her right there, to ask her to be his girlfriend, and what does he do instead? Freezes. James Potter, master of smooth pick-up lines, carefree, easy-going Gryffindor heartthrob (says the Hogwarts gossip circle, not that he pays attention to any of that—why would he when he’s got his heart set on one girl?) freezes.

Well, he didn’t totally freeze. After they’d apparated back to the cabin, he and Lily were the last two in the sitting area before they went to bed. He walked her to the door of the girl’s room and kissed her on the cheek before bidding her goodnight.

It had taken all of his willpower to not pull her into his arms and snog her senseless after her confession earlier that evening. Yet, after seeing her disappointed face before she shut the door to the bedroom, he wished he had. She’d thrown his entire game off, and he needed to fix it before he lost his chance with Lily for good.

Resigning himself to the fact that he was awake to see another sunrise, James dragged himself out of bed and picked up his glasses on the nightstand before stepping around the mattress on the floor where Peter currently snored away. He grabbed the nearest shirt he could find and threw it on before slipping out of the bedroom.

It was lighter out than he was expecting, meaning he’d probably missed the sunrise. The boys preferred to sleep in pitch black, but the spell they cast on the window the night before was fading, allowing the daybreak to sift through and consequently throwing off his sense of time. He started the coffee pot and leaned against the counter while he waited for the pot to brew.

Caffeine would be necessary to stay awake today, or maybe he could sneak a nap in at some point. Hell, maybe he’d be able to convince Lily to join him for said nap. He could think of plenty of things they could get up to whilst they were in bed together. James let his mind wander to thoughts of getting to know her in a more intimate setting. The kind that he’d often wank to when he needed a release.

The rich smell of dark roast wafted through the living area. James forced his thoughts away from images of Lily writhing beneath him as he reached for a mug. He only barely heard the click of a door as he pulled the pot off to pour himself a cup.

“Another early morning?”

James looked up to see Lily standing there, her hair messy from sleep. She ran her fingers through it in an attempt to comb it out. The green of her eyes were barely visible under still somewhat droopy eyelids. Something stirred within him, and despite the fact that he was only seventeen, it was a view he knew he could get used to.

“That would imply I slept. I hope I didn’t wake you.”

“No, but I couldn’t resist the smell of coffee. Why couldn’t you sleep?”

“Peter’s snoring reached new levels last night.”

The lie slipped off his lips with ease, although it wasn’t altogether convincing. A simple Muffliato charm would have allowed him the peace and quiet he needed to fall asleep. Her skeptical look wasn’t lost on him as he absent-mindedly began fixing the cup he’d poured with the amount of milk and sugar Lily preferred. He wasn’t aware he was doing it until he handed it to her.

“Thanks,” she said. “Since when do you know how I take my coffee?”

“Come on, Evans, you don’t think I’ve noticed? Some things stick after eating breakfast with someone over the last year.” James smirked.

He grabbed another mug from the cabinet and poured his own cup without adding anything to it. James blew over the dark brown liquid to help cool it off as he watched Lily take a minuscule sip of her own.

“That’s fair. I still don’t know how you can drink yours black.”

“Some say I’m sweet enough on my own.” The quip was automatic as Lily laughed at his humor.

Merlin, her laugh is infectious. James swore the reason he said half of the stuff he did was so he could hear her laugh.

“Do you want to go for a walk?”

The question came from nowhere, but the early morning was so peaceful that he wanted to experience it with her, preferably hand in hand.

“Sure.”

They left their coffee mugs abandoned on the Formica as they headed to the door and slid on their shoes. Lily grabbed a jacket off the coat rack and zipped it up halfway. James closed the door quietly behind him then led her over to the trail he and the boys explored yesterday. The path wasn’t terribly long, but it ended up in a quiet and secluded area where the lake met pebbled terrain.

“So, was the dolphin a good sleeping partner?” James’s voice cut through the light layer of morning fog.

Lily chuckled. “I don’t know, I let Marly sleep with him instead.”

“Ah, Sirius will be heartbroken if he learns of your betrayal.” His words were meant to be a joke, yet they didn’t come across as lighthearted as he’d hoped.

“Well, good thing you won’t tell him. Right?” Lily’s questioning eyes made James’s heart skip a beat.

“I suppose I can keep your secret, Evans, but it’ll cost you.”

“Oh? And what might that price be, Potter?”

The green of the trees and shrubbery only enhanced the sparkle that glinted in her eyes. James wondered if she was testing him. Shouldn’t she know by now that he never backed down from a challenge?

“Ditch your friends and spend the day with me instead.”

“Like a date?”

“Yes, Evans, like a date.”

“Well, good thing we’re getting an early start. Now we can make the most of the day.”

James grinned at Lily’s acceptance as they continued down the trail.

They were nearly at the clearing by the water when Lily stopped, causing James to turn around. “Is this the path you and the boys were on yesterday afternoon?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Well, when Mary asked if you found anything interesting, you said no.”

“Because there isn’t…”

“That’s not true! Look at the blackberry bushes over there!”

James’s head turned to the direction Lily was pointing at, and sure enough, there were several bushes, low to the ground and full of clumps of blackberries. Lily bent down to pick a few off the branches.

“How do you know they’re blackberries and not nightshade or something?”

“Honestly, Potter, did you not pay attention when Sprout taught that unit on edible plants and where to find them in the wilderness?”

“No? Guess I was a bit distracted.”

“Nightshade grows off the stem in one circle. They look more like blueberries, except they’re shinier and darker. Blackberries have all the little bumps on them like this. Almost like a raspberry, but a different color.”

Lily picked a handful of berries during her explanation and stood when she was finished. James saw her holding them delicately in an effort to stop them staining her hands. Using her forefinger and thumb, she picked one up and held it to James’s mouth.

“Try it.”

James opened his mouth and let her place the berry on his tongue. He locked eyes with her as his lips closed around her fingers. An explosion of flavor bursts on his tongue as he bit down on the fruit. The tartness caused him to squint and pucker his lips slightly. Lily smiled at his reaction as she popped a couple berries in her mouth.

She was right—they tasted way better when picked fresh. He held out his hand for more, and she gave him a couple to munch on as they continued walking through the woods. James’s brain was fixated on the way she fed him as his feet moved him forward. Their hands grazed against each other, and James held on after the third bump. He felt her fingers intertwine with his as their steps aligned on the dirt path. As they inched their way toward the rocky clearing of the lake, a plan formed in his mind, and he knew exactly what he needed to do to match Lily’s brazenness of the night before and kick off their day-long date properly.

“Oh, wow,” she whispered as the trail gave way to the stunning view of the calm water ahead of them. The fog had settled across the still water, preventing them from seeing the other side of the lake.

“Lily—”

“Okay, the berries were one thing, but hiding this view from us? How—” Lily froze mid-sentence as comprehension dawned on her. “Did you just call me Lily?”

“Yeah, I did, but please go on about how we didn’t tell you about this.”

“No, I think I’d rather hear what you have to say instead.”

“You sure? I know how much you love being able to prove us wrong.”

James paused, waiting for Lily’s reaction. He loved riling her up like this. The way he alluded to something but then held it just out of her grasp to ensure that she truly wanted to know what he had to say. Shoving his hands in his pockets, he waited.

“What do you mean, am I sure? Would I have asked you to tell me if I wasn’t?”

He thought about keeping up with the banter, but he was tired of waiting.

“That’s fair. Look, I know I kissed you before—y’know, last night—but I didn’t do it right, and I’d like to make up for that right now if you’ll let me.”

There was a sharp intake of air, and if James could pat himself on the back for catching Lily off-guard, he would. But she regained her composure before shooting a challenging look in his direction.

“Since when does James Potter ask permission before kissing a girl? I thought he—how did Sirius put it? Sets his eyes on what he wants and goes for it?”

James chuckled and cringed at the same time, remembering how Sirius explained James’s intentions during fifth year.

“Well, as true as that may be, I still try to be a gentleman about it. I’d never make an unwanted advance if that’s what you’re implying.”

“Interesting, considering I thought I made it clear what I wanted last night.”

Were his eyes playing tricks on him, or did Lily just take a tiny step forward?

“Is that so?”

“It is. And it sounds like you’re stalling.”

“Please, Evans, you’d know when I’d be stalling.”

“What are you waiting for, then?”

The words barely escaped her mouth, James didn’t waste any more time as his hands lifted to cup Lily’s face. He leaned in and captured her lips with his, the tangy taste of the berries still lingering on her mouth. Everything about Lily’s lips were soft and inviting as her hands found a home on his lower back. He felt her mouth open slightly as her teeth grazed his bottom lip, eliciting a small moan from his mouth.

James deepened the kiss as his tongue swiped across her lips. Her hands pushed him closer as her mouth widened, inviting him to explore. A quack in the distance was the only thing that reminded them where they were, as James slowly broke away. She was more beautiful than he remembered, with her lips swollen from his kiss and the dazed look of bliss on her face.

“Well, I’m used to ending the date with a kiss, not starting it,” her words were breathless.

James chuckled at Lily’s words. “Am I to take that as a good or bad thing?”

“Good. Very good.”

“And just imagine, we’ve got the whole day ahead of us now.”

“This is true. Should we head back and get ready for the rest of the day?”

“Sounds brilliant.”

James had no idea what they were going to do for the day, but he planned on making the most of their time spent together. Nothing could go wrong.

[themadlostgirl]

Abandoned (9)

*They’re making progress. Slowly but surely.”

~~~

I was confused when I woke up the next morning because I wasn’t on the beach in my little hut like I always was when I woke up. Then I remembered last night and how I had ended up in this treehouse. Peter was next to me. That wasn’t a big surprise but it eased my worries that he was still with me after yesterday.

A lot had been said last night. Secrets that we had both been harboring pulled into the light of day. I felt lighter now that I had shared with Peter the scars I carried. For so long I had been swimming with a cannonball strapped to my leg as I tried to paddle helplessly to shore. Now, it felt like that cannonball had come unshackled from my ankle and I could finally move forward. I wasn’t to shore yet but I had confidence that I wasn’t going to drown.

I wondered briefly if it felt the same for Peter. Obviously he’s been harboring this secret about his curse for a long time and has been trying to be brave in the face of his own death. This weight that he’s been carrying with him, literally watching his life tick away in a golden hourglass, that’s not something one can take lightly.

There was a small part of me that was kind of relieved to see Peter cry. I don’t like seeing him in tears but just knowing that this boy that I have looked at as indestructible and unflappable was capable of breaking down was a needed reminder that he was human. He may act like a demon but he is still a boy. He has emotions, whether he chooses to acknowledge them or not.

The time following that night in the treehouse stretched peacefully. Peter looked much more relieved to be free of the burden of bearing his secret alone. The only change he did show were the sad looks he passed to me any time we were alone together. I could blink and miss it with how quick they came and went but I still saw them all the same.

He looked at me as if his world was balancing on a frayed string. His hold on me got a little tighter and his words got softer. I figured it was his curse weighing on him but when he pulled away from me one night when things were getting frisky I saw that same sad look in his eyes and realized the truth.

It wasn’t his secret causing him this grief, it was mine. Before when Peter would sometimes allow the moment to heat up between us he doused almost as soon as it begun now. I know that he’s doing it so not to make me uncomfortable but it just made me feel unwanted at the end of the night. One such day we had gone out swimming together by this waterfall. We were having fun splashing around and exchanging a few kisses.

I teased him by sneaking up on him under the water and quickly poking him in the thigh or butt before swimming off. He was getting red in the face and cursed that I kept slipping away faster than he could grab me. Eventually he did catch me and held me tight to his chest to keep me from swimming away again. Laughter and squeals turned into deep kisses and happy giggles. I wrapped my legs around Peter’s waist to help keep myself in place while we made out.

While making out I felt something poke against me. For a few moments Peter was too grounded in his pleasure at the embrace he didn’t notice. Normally when he got an erection he immediately shied away from me and I was waiting for him to do it this time but he hadn’t. As subtly as I could I let myself grind against it a bit and felt a pleasurable jolt ripple up my spine. Peter must have felt it too cause he groaned against my mouth.

I was able to get away with going slowly for a while but when I started moving faster the lustful spell Peter was under broke and he finally fully realized what was going on. I had to keep my legs locked around him so he couldn’t shove me off.

“Peter,” I grabbed his face and forced him to look at me, “It is alright. I want to do this.”

“But--”

“I. Am. Enjoying. This.” I enunciated the words clearly. “You don’t have to be so worried about scaring me off.”

Peter sighed, “I’m sorry, swordfish. I just never wanted to overstep.”

“I’ll let you know if you do. But you need to stop keeping me at an arms distance.” I kissed his cheek, “You said that you would banish that bastard from my memory, right?”

“I did say that, didn’t I?”

“Well, how can you replace all the bad memories he created if you won’t let us create new better ones?”

“You really trust me that much?”

“I trust you even more.”

“I love…” his gaze searched my face, “I love...I love that you trust me so much, swordfish.”

My heart sank a little at his words. I guess I had been hoping he would say something else in that moment. Then again, I don’t know how capable Peter Pan is of something as scary and committed as love.

I shrugged off the moment of disappointment and rested my head on his shoulder. “I trust you with my life, Peter. I always will.”

Peter spent the night sleeping next to me that evening. I cannot say for sure when the word love became something I wished to hear Peter say. Nor do I remember when I started wanting to say it to him. It came upon so gradually that I hadn’t even noticed until it was too late. My heart belonged solely to Peter and it terrified me. I was in love with him and I wanted nothing more than for him to love me too.

Peter was the first to fall asleep. I wasn’t surprised. He said he slept better next to me. I stayed awake listening to him breathe until his snores got deeper and I knew he was fast asleep. “I dreamt that you called me your love the other night. It made me so happy.” I whispered, “I hope that it’s true cause I love you too, my Peter.” I kissed his cheek. It felt good to say it out loud even if he didn’t truly hear me. Maybe it would trickle into his ears and he’d hear it in his dreams. Maybe he would remember and in the morning he would say he loved me too.

I had a dream that night. I was in a town slumped against a wall naked and cold and scared. There was no sign of life. Not from the tavern behind me nor anywhere else in the town. I ran to the pier trying to find a ship to board but all the docks were empty. I searched the sky for the star that could lead me home but clouds covered it.

No way out. Nowhere to run. I wanted to yell for Peter but no words left my mouth. I couldn’t breathe. The world was too cold. Where had Peter gone? Why was I here? Why had I been abandoned again? A pair of arms grabbed me from behind and pulled me into the chest of someone. A gruff voice whispered in my ear, “Kitten…”

I woke with a jolt breathing hard and shaking. When I closed my eyes I was thrust back into the dream and it only made me cry.

“Precious, what’s wrong?” Peter’s groggy morning voice reached out to me like a tether through the darkness. I reached for him and found his waiting arms. He rubbed my back in smooth motions and whispered words of comfort in my ear.

“I was back there,” I cried, “I was back in that town and I couldn’t get out. He found me...he found me and I couldn’t--”

“Hush now,” Peter whispered, pressing reassuring kisses to my temple. “That bastard can’t touch you. You’re on Neverland with me. You’re safe. I’m never gonna let anyone hurt you again, my pearl.”

My breathing evened out but I still clung onto Peter like a vice. Tears silently streamed down my face, unable to stop.

“Hey Lost Girl, are you awake yet? I have bananas if you want one.” A head ducked down to look inside my hut. Baelfire.

The three of us froze. I felt Peter tense next to me.

I could tell he wanted to jump up and grab Baelfire. This boy had been eluding him for so long and now he finally had him within his grasp. All he had to do was let me go. My grip on Peter slackened.

“Go away,” Peter muttered darkly.

I looked up confused. Peter stared daggers at Baelfire. “Don’t be stupid, Baelfire. Leave us.”

Baelfire turned and sprinted away. Peter sighed and pulled me closer. The question I wanted to ask sat waiting on my tongue but I was too stunned to say it. Peter looked at me and rolled his eyes. “Did you think I was gonna leave you, precious?”

I nodded dumbly.

“My pearl,” Peter rested his forehead against mine, “Don’t you know you’re more important than some stupid game?”

Fresh tears sprung to my eyes but they were of a different breed then they had been earlier. I was happy. Why was I crying if I was happy? Peter didn’t leave my side for the rest of the day. That night he felt the moment Baelfire escaped the island but didn’t say anything. He sighed and nuzzled his face more into my neck.

I didn’t ask him why he didn’t seem concerned that Baelfire had escaped considering how much he wanted to capture him in the first place. All I wanted to remember was that when Peter was faced with the choice of capturing Baelfire or staying by to comfort me he chose me. He told me I was more important.

Peter eventually did have to leave to go talk to the boys and tell them that Baelfire had managed to escape. He figured that it was news that would not go over well. He may not be able to see me until late tomorrow evening but if I needed him at all before then all I needed to do was call and he would be there.

It was lonely without Peter but I took the day away from him to go and talk to Tink. I hadn’t seen much of her since my relationship with Peter really started and I had missed talking to her. It would probably be healthy for me to talk to someone other than Peter. I could have pleasant enough chats with the Lost Boys and when Baelfire used to come around but they were all boys. Girls needed girls sometimes.

Tinkerbell was surprised to see but invited me in and talked to me all the same. We agreed we needed to spend more time together and I promised to come see her more often. Peter didn’t mind that I was hanging out with Tink more as my time with her gave him time to rally with the boys. The upside was that now that Peter and I were spending most of the day apart that meant that he almost always spent the night with me. Once evening fell Peter was all mine and I was all his. I preferred it that way.

It had been several weeks since Baelfire had escaped. Life on the island was as normal as it had ever been. Then one night Peter’s shadow returned. I hadn’t even noticed that the shadow was ferrying someone when I saw it shoot across the sky. The shadow was dark and the person it carried was pale. They almost looked like a shooting star streaking across the sky before they got closer and I was able to make out the shape of a human. It flew above me into the jungle before I could get a good look.

Peter also watched it go but shrugged it off saying he would make his greetings in the morning. Strangely enough though when morning came the boys had no news of a new boy in the island. No one had even seen the shadow drop someone off. Perhaps they were lost in the jungle. The boys scattered the island but came up with nothing. Whoever the shadow had brought they had disappeared into thin air.

This was more than alarming to Peter who didn’t like the idea that someone was loose on his island that he didn’t know. His days were spent with the boys as they combed the island again and again trying to find the escapee. I checked Baelfire’s old camp to see if the new guy had hunkered down there but it was as abandoned as the day Baelfire left it.

I went to visit Tink and told her about the strange happenings going on in the jungle.

“That is strange.” Tink shrugged, “And the boys have no idea where this person could be or even what they look like?”

“Not a clue. You wouldn’t happen to know anything about it, would you?” I asked.

“Can’t say I do. All the Lost Boys look alike to me so if there is a new one running around I couldn’t say that I could recognize them.”

“The boys are all in a tizzy about it. This boy is really good at hide and seek and it is starting to piss Peter off to no end that he can’t figure out where they’re hiding. Understandable since it is his island and all.”

I set my cup of tea down and paced around the treehouse. “I mean, they have checked every nook and cranny of this island. Where in the world could they be?”

I plunked down on top of Tink’s big treasure chest.

“Eep!”

“What was that?” I asked, looking around the treehouse. “Did you hear that?”

“Hear what?” Tink said.

“I swear I heard something. Almost sounded like a wounded bird or something.” I strained my ears to see if I could hear it again. Tink had frozen in her seat. Her eyes were cast down into her cup.

I narrowed my gaze at her. Why was she acting skittish? I stood up and noticed her gaze flicker to the chest I had been sitting on. Hm…

I turned to the chest and lightly kicked the side of it. “Hey Tink,” I spoke calmly, “What is it you keep in his old chest of yours?”

“Just a bunch of junk. Some blankets, extra set of clothes, a few useless odds and ends.” She shrugged. “Nothing of interest.”

“Uh huh,” I reached for the lid, “You wouldn’t mind if I snooped would you?”

“I would actually,” She said, her eyes met mine, “It may be junk but it is personal junk.”

“All the more reason I want to take a peek.” I pulled the lid up.

“Don’t!” Tink jumped to her feet.

“Oh Tinkerbell, Tinkerbell, Tinkerbell,” I ripped the blanket away to reveal our hidden guest nestled tightly at the bottom of the chest. “I thought we were better friends than this.”

“Listen,” Tink tried to pull me away, “You don’t have to do this. She hasn’t done anything wrong.”

“That’s your opinion.” I reached into the chest and pulled the figure in her white nightgown up to standing. “Hello again, Wendy Darling. You shouldn’t have come back here.”

“I’m here to rescue Baelfire!” Wendy ripped her arms from my grasp. “And I am not leaving without him!”

“Oh, did Tink not tell you?” I laughed, “Oh you poor, pretty thing. Baelfire escaped the island weeks ago. He’s not here.”

“No…” Wendy breathed out in horror, “No! You’re lying!”

“I am? Fine. Then let’s ask someone else. Oh Tinkerbell, is Baelfire still on Neverland? Be honest now.”

Tink met Wendy’s eyes with regret. She nodded. “He isn’t on Neverland. He managed to escape a long time ago.”

“Oh god…” Wendy was shaking, “If Baelfire isn’t here then--”

“Then you walked back into the open jaws of a lion voluntarily, Darling.” I pinched her cheeks. “No use trying to run or hide now. So how about you come quietly? I’m sure Peter would love to see you again.”

“Please, just send me home, I know you don’t like me. You don’t want me here. Just send me away again.”

“No. That’s too easy. Besides, I have no reason to be jealous or angry at you anymore. You’re just a blemish on my life now. Annoying but tolerable if I can’t see you.” I shoved her towards the rope ladder. “Now move.”

I brought Wendy back to the camp. She was silent the entire time. Resigned to whatever fate awaited her. Easy enough to say, the boys were surprised when I walked in with her. Peter most of all. He had truly not expected to see Wendy Darling again after he sent her away the first time.

“What to do, what to do?” Peter circled her. “My Lost Girl was right about not sending you home. That’s what you want. I cannot have you roaming about as you did before though. Ideas?”

“Just stuff her in a cage and be over with it.” Felix said. “What else is there to think about?”

“Too easy.” Peter said, “We need something unique for this equally interesting happenstance.”

“I have an idea!” I bounced on my heels as an idea started to take root in my mind.

“Speak it, spitfire. I’m interested in what you have to say about this.” Peter grinned, pulling me close to him.

“Well, if she wants to go home so bad then I saw we give her the opportunity.” I said.

“This isn’t the same scenario you proposed I do with Baelfire is it?” Peter asked, disdain clear on his face.

“Oh no, nothing like that.” I pulled him aside so Wendy couldn’t hear. “She will be our very own Sisyphus.”

“What?”

“It’s an old tale I remember hearing about. Sisyphus was some man that was cursed in the afterlife to constantly push a boulder up a hill. He was told that if he could push the boulder to the top of the hill then he could go free. But no matter what, every time he gets near the top the boulder rolls back down dooming him for eternity. We could do something similar with Wendy.”

“Stars you are perfect.” Peter grabbed me and kissed me hungrily. “What impossible task were you thinking?”

“Something simple enough to give her hope but maddening enough that she’ll never accomplish it. Like a jigsaw puzzle.”

“A puzzle?”

“A puzzle with a million different pieces that never actually seem to fit together. Tell her that if she can solve the puzzle then she can go home. If she doesn’t complete the puzzle within the day though it will reset and she’ll be forced to start all over again. It’ll keep her busy and out of the way until you have need of her.”

“I love that devious little mind of yours.” Peter kissed me once more. We strolled back over to the bound Wendy as Peter explained his terms. A spark of hope flickered in Wendy’s eyes and she readily agreed. She was taken to the Echo Caves to stay and Peter conjured the puzzle. I nabbed a piece and stuffed it in my pocket. A personal assurance that even if she somehow did ever get close she would never have an actual chance of completing it.

---

(Previous) (Next)

[ohmystars-marvel]

So...you’re mine, huh?

Pairing: Tony Stark x daughter!reader; Peter Parker x reader (eventually)

Word count: 1,808

Summary: When your mother passes, she wrote in her will if she passed when you were still a minor, guardianship would get passed to Tony Stark. You have no idea what their relationship was, despite both of them living their lives in the spotlight. However, for someone who lived in the spotlight, your mother held plenty of secrets.

A/N: Hi welcome to my first ever fic....please be gentle with me, I swear I’ll try to get better with time. Anyway, since this is my first, why not kick it off with a series?? Depending if you guys like it, I’ll try to post a second part in a couple days, just depends on how busy I am with homework.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tony was in a meeting when he found out that (Y/M/N) (Y/L/N) died.  Notification after notification lit up his phone, and his phone practically fell off the conference table with the constant buzzing. He was standing up to leave the conference room when he finally checked his phone. His heart dropped within his chest. 

Sure, Pepper knows she’s the one for him, but (Y/M/N) was a different love and certainly from a different chapter of his life. Hell, (Y/M/N) (Y/L/N) was one of his very few childhood friends, and probably his first love. It could be said that she’d match his intelligence, and when she couldn’t, she made it up with her wit and her own heartbreaker tendencies. She had that natural aura of capturing an entire room’s attention, even if she’s trying not to. 

A car crash. That’s what took out (Y/M/N) (Y/L/N). A fucking car crash. God, he never expected something that normal to be the thing to take (Y/M/N) away from this world. He thought it would’ve been some kind of freaky accident, some stupid daredevil attempt that would kill her. God, the last time he saw her, it was years ago. He was still the genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist he once was, and she was still the rebellious heartbreaker she once was. That night they both had far too much to drink to think clearly. Still, in a very (Y/M/N) fashion, she made the parts of the night that he can remember unforgettable. The weight of (Y/M/N)’s death hit in like a freight train. The only thing he could do sit back in the chair he was in before and just stare at the words on his phone:

CEO OF (Y/L/N) TECH INDUSTRIES KILLED BY CAR ACCIDENT WHILE HEADED TO AIRPORT

Pepper found him still sitting in his chair in shock. She approached him slowly, and gently put her hand on his shoulder. He flinched in his chair, unaware that Pepper even entered the room at all. He took a deep breath and pinched the bridge of his nose  with his hand, closing his eyes.

“I saw the news and I wanted to check on you. I’m sorry, Tony.” she said softly. 

Tony was still hiding his face with his own hand, but used his other hand to squeeze Pepper’s on his shoulder. Tony took another deep breath, and took his hand away from Pepper and his face and stood up.

“I’m gonna take the rest of the day off.” he mumbled to her, grabbing his phone from the desk and leaving the room abruptly.

Pepper tried to follow after him out into the hallway, but he had already entered the elevator, and closed the doors on her.

******

Tony spent all of his time in the lab for the next couple of days. He didn’t leave, he didn’t eat; he was deep in his grief and putting his emotions through working on one of his Iron Man suits. Well, he was until Peter came in. Peter cautiously approached the lab, holding up a greasy paper sack with a small smile and knocked on the glass door. Tony only looked up at Peter and went back to working. It was a small step, but he at least acknowledged someone. Peter entered the lab, and gently closed the door. He sat at one of the benches, watching Tony for a minute.

“I-I hope I’m not bothering you, Mr. Stark, but Mrs. Potts said you’ve been working on your suit, and I thought maybe you’d want some help! I was also patrolling the neighborhood earlier and this guy was getting mugged and so I captured the mugger and the guy paid me back in a couple of free cheeseburgers and fries and I thought maybe you’d like one as well. I didn’t really know how you like your cheeseburgers, so I just got them plain.” Peter rambled.

Peter placed the bag on the worktable and sat on the stool across from Tony.

“I understand if you don’t wanna talk, Mr. Stark. I was the same way when my Uncle Ben died. I didn’t really talk to anyone for weeks, so it’s okay if you don’t want to talk. I can just sit here and help. But I think you should at least eat though.” Peter mumbled the last sentence as he sat on a work stool across from Tony.

Tony paused for a second, and sighed. It was almost like he was debating within himself. Peter couldn’t tell which part of the internal battle Tony wanted to win, but he resumed to work on a part of one the arms. Peter just patiently watched from his stool, resting his head on the worktable underneath his hands. He zoned out for a little bit, unaware of how much time had passed with his head in the clouds.

“Hey, kid. You said you wanted to help, but here you are daydreaming. Come here and hold this panel back and a flashlight while I toy with the cables for a second.” Tony didn’t even look up when he spoke up.

Peter jumped from his stool eagerly and did an overeager walk/jog over to help Tony. He held the panel and used the flashlight on his phone, trying to give Tony a good amount of light.

“Hold it higher and a little to the right.” Tony instructed.

Peter stood like that for a little while, despite his arms starting to get tired. He was determined though to power through it. After all, Mr. Stark trusted him with this task, so he should be able to uphold it.

“She was one of those types of women that when they were told they wouldn’t be able to do something, she’d go and prove them wrong. She started up her own tech company in order to prove to her own father that she could’ve been a worthy heir to his job within Stark Industries. God, the look on his face when at her first gala when she called him out in front of hundreds of people that attended. I’ll never forget that.” Tony softly chuckled. 

“She sounds like she was an amazing person, Mr. Stark.”

He put down his tools and eyed the bag of cheeseburgers and fries that were getting cold. 

“Maybe those cheeseburgers were a good idea, kid.” Tony smirked at Peter, who Peter smiled right back at.

Peter stayed for a couple more hours after that, and Tony talked of (Y/M/N) and the adventures that he had shared with her (keeping the stories strictly PG-13 of course) until Aunt May called Peter’s phone. Naturally, Tony covered for Peter before calling Happy to get the car to drive Peter home. When the car was ready, Pepper went down to the lab and told Peter Happy was ready whenever he was. Peter left with a quick goodbye, breezing past Pepper. 

“So, you used the kid to get me to open up, huh?” Tony raised an eyebrow at her.

“Tony, you practically locked yourself in here! You wouldn’t eat or talk to any of us, what was I to do? Besides, talking to him made you feel better, didn’t it?”

“I won’t say that it did, but if you put me in a courtroom, I would say yes to the lawyer.”

“Well it’s nice to hear your sarcasm again. I also came down to tell you that they’ve decided to give (Y/M/N) a funeral service and I think you should go.”

“Of course I’d go. What day did they decide on?” 

“Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow? Pepper, how long have you been sitting on this information?” Tony demanded, visibly upset. 

“Oh I’m sorry. Next time when you’re that deep in grief? I’ll still make you do missions or other Avengers activities.” Pepper responded, just as upset. 

“I don’t want to argue over this anymore. What time does it start tomorrow?” 

“Eleven. Do you want me to go with you?”

“No...this is something I’ve got to do by myself. Besides, imagine what will appear in the news. No offense, Pep, but it’ll look bad if you show up. It’ll be a field day of Stark’s new versus old girlfriend. I don’t want that for you and for her legacy.”

“I understand. Just...at least let Happy take you in the car?”

“Of course.” Tony briefly kissed her cheek and left the lab.

******

The next morning when Tony arrived at the address for the funeral, the press was already swarming his car. When he was just barely climbing out his car, there were 2 cameras being shoved into his face. Happy helped him get the front door by shoving the cameras down, and yelling at them to be more respectful. After all, it was a funeral, not the red carpet. 

When Tony went inside, he was surprised by the amount of people. It was an even mixture of other CEOs from other technology based businesses and people (Y/M/N) would’ve known personally. He could pinpoint all of the CEOs naturally, but was struggling to place the others. Perhaps they worked under (Y/M/N) or he recognized some of them from old social media posts (Y/M/N) posted. Tony went around passing niceties with those that were familiar to him. There was one person that he couldn’t place, however. It was a teenage girl, who was seated in the first row. An older man was sitting next to her, with his arm around her and rubbing her shoulder in a fatherly way. 

He as well didn’t recognize the older man, but it definitely wasn’t (Y/M/N)’s father. He suffered a stroke years ago, a couple of months after the gala, and didn’t recover. (Y/M/N)’s mother died from heartbreak months later. (Y/M/N) wasn’t very close to her parents, but he remembered how hard it still was to lose both of her parents within that time frame. He kept staring at the two in the front, despite trying to hold conversations with others and trying not to appear rude. Someone that he talked to, an awfully gossip kind of woman, caught him staring at the girl once again. The woman smiled knowingly.

“Don’t recognize her?” she asked, almost too sweetly.

The woman giggled. “She’s not an intern, Mr. Stark. That is in fact, (Y/N) (Y/L/N). Her daughter.”

Daughter? A million thoughts ran through Tony’s head, but before he could even ask the woman how she knew, he was interrupted.

“If everyone would like to find their seats, we would like to begin” the older man stood at a podium, speaking into the microphone, leaving Tony stranded with his thoughts. 

Daughter?

[m00nycore]

𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒐𝒏𝒍𝒚 𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒍𝒆𝒇𝒕 . 𝒐𝒏𝒆 . 𝒇𝒂𝒎𝒊𝒍𝒊𝒂𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒚 .

ℎ𝑜𝑤 𝑑𝑜 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑟𝑒𝑚𝑜𝑣𝑒 𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒 𝑓𝑟𝑜𝑚 ℎ𝑎𝑡𝑒?

[𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑑 𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑟𝑜 𝑓𝑖𝑟𝑠𝑡]

𝑠𝑒𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑠 𝑚𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡

𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑎𝑢𝑑𝑒𝑟 𝑜𝑐

𝑡/𝑤 : 𝑑𝑒𝑝𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛, 𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝑑𝑒𝑎𝑡ℎ, 𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑎𝑙 𝑠𝑐𝑎𝑟𝑠, 𝑟𝑒𝑝𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑒𝑑 𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑢𝑚𝑎

𝑡𝑎𝑔𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡 ;; @dreaming-about-fanfictions @thesweethufflepuff

“he looks so like james! i mean, remus, can you believe it?! his eyes are exactly the same, just like lily’s! you talked to him on the train, you saved him—what is he like?”

and remus smiled at her, shaking his head. he hadn’t seen lucy this happy in years—and it was as if they were young again, as if the horror had never happened.

she had fiercely loved harry since he was born. all she had wanted since lily and james passed was to be able to take him in. harry gave her hope.

“exactly as you would expect him to be, and that was only at the first impression,” he was leaned against the desk in his new office, and lucy had insisted on helping him unpack.

remus had almost forgotten she had dimples.

“i will never forgive albus for not letting me take him in, moony—“ she cut herself off, quickly, very quickly, almost as if she were scared.

and lucy potter was scared.

she never used their old names. not until dumbledore dubbed her professor vulpes—and that wasn’t her, it wasn’t. she was playing a part.

but remus lupin smiled and it just about broke her heart.

“vulpes,” he said it warmly, as if greeting an old friend. in some ways, he reckoned, he was.

“moony,” she repeated. lucy potter was reminded about what it felt like to be young.

to new beginnings, he thought to himself, as he sipped his hot chocolate.

it was the first day of term, the first time that the third year students filed in the room—and lucy potter was almost scared to see him. harry potter: the only other potter in the school—the only other potter left.

the first few lessons went smoothly, and remus was, amazing, she thought. absolutely amazing.

harry walked in, looking skeptical, accompanied by a ginger-haired boy—a weasley, she knew it.

the potters loved their gingers, didn’t they?

harry’s eyes scanned the room and stopped at his aunt, who smiled.

she wanted nothing more than to run up, to hug him tightly, to cry. she wanted to apologize for not being able to take him in, she needed to know if he could ever forgive her.

harry deserved to know everything about his parents. harry deserved to know remus, to know her, as well.

sometimes lucy liked to think that she deserved to know him, too.

the wardrobe that she and remus had pulled out began to shake, and she saw a few of the students step back, eyes wide, some faces paling.

rising from her place, she walked forward, giving a little wave as she stood beside remus.

“welcome,” remus began, nodding at the crowd. “i am professor lupin—it is very nice to meet you all.”

“i’m professor vulpes,” she added. the name still sounded foreign on her tongue. “lovely to meet you!”

the cabinet shook once more.

“ah, i suppose that’s our cue to begin the lesson, yes?” remus asked, rhetorically. “intriguing, isn’t it?” he paused. “would anyone like to venture to guess as to what is inside?”

“that’s a boggart, that is.”

“very good, mr. thomas,” remus praised. “now, does anybody know what a boggart looks like?”

“nobody knows,” a girl’s voice spoke, and lucy realized it was hermione granger, the student using a time turner to take as many classes as she could. admirable.

“when’d she get here?!” ron weasley demanded. harry seemed to have good friends—apparently, the three of them were an infamous trio.

“boggarts are shape shifters,” she continued, ignoring ron. “they take shape of whatever a particular person fears most. that’s what makes them so—“

“—so terrifying,” remus finished, smiling. “yes, yes, yes.”

the students were soon practicing the riddikulus charm, wandless, and still flinching when the wardrobe shook.

neville longbottom was called forward by remus—another reminder of the past that made lucy want to cry.

it was marleen who had managed to find the mead—and dorcas’ idea to mix it with juice.

the girls were all laughing, gossiping, talking about their love lives. lucy was laying across lily’s lap, looking up at alice.

“frank?” alice questioned, again, with lily nodding at her. “i’ll have babies with him, mark my words.”

remus encouraging him made her smile. she was unable to keep that adoration out of her face—remus was infallibly kind.

alice and frank would have been so proud.

but her blood boiled, it absolutely boiled, when neville admitted his biggest fear was snape.

“frightens all,” remus remarked, among the laughter of neville’s peers.

“truly,” she added, winking at neville. she never approved of her brother and... his best friend... bullying severus—but he was cruel.

thus, lucy laughed the loudest when she saw him in mrs. longbottom’s clothing, and beamed at the smile that neville wore. he looked like alice.

the children formed a line as remus put a record on the phonograph. remus loved jazz—and she had grown fonder of it as well. she couldn’t listen to a lot of the music she used to.

“now, i want everyone to picture the thing they fear the very most, and turn it into something funny. ron!”

snape instantaneously transformed into a giant spider, and ron looked absolutely petrified, hesitating a few seconds longer than he should have.

“you’ve got it, ron!” lucy exclaimed, nodding at him. “think of something funny, come on!”

“riddikulus!” the spider suddenly had skates on each of its eight legs, making it slide around the floor. ron high-fived harry as he made his way to the back of the line.

pavarti patil feared snakes, seamus finnegan feared banshees, and dean thomas’s boggart took the form of a disembodied, living hand.

she tensed when harry stepped up—and remus caught her eye.

as the boggart shifted, fear began to fill harry’s eyes, as well—and it increased when the boggart took the form of a dementor.

without thinking, lucy bolted from her seat to stand in front of him—and her boggart took form.

a black dog.

“riddikulus!” she shouted, forcing her voice to sound calm and willing her body not to shake.

padfo—the dog turned into a plush toy, and remus came to her shoulder to send the boggart into the wardrobe and lock it with the flick of his wrist.

“alright, well, sorry about that! that’s enough for today, why don’t you all collect your books from the back of the class? that’s the end of the lesson, thank you!”

the students groaned, and remus began lecturing on how you shouldn’t have too much of a good thing.

lucy turned, facing harry, and patted his shoulder. he looked a bit put out, and she was suddenly worried her protectiveness had embarrassed him.

“it’s alright, harry,” she assured him, a maternal smile on her face. her first time speaking to her nephew in more than a decade, and it was impossible not to feel shaken. “at least your boggart wasn’t a dog.”

remus wasn’t like the others.

james would have been the one to ask if she wanted to talk about it.

peter would have beat around the bush trying to decide if he should ask her.

remus just offered for her to not sit in for the next few lessons. she refused. he smiled, and hugged her.

and he... if he were there, he would have just demanded to know. and she would have told him. she always told him.

lucy refused to even think his name—and when she did, it felt like hell. then there were the memories—the memories, oh god, they burned.

a wolf, a stag, a rat, a fox, and... a dog.

five people trying to fit under the same cloak. the black lake during sunset. running from the source of the noise. sleepovers in the wrong dorm, and late night trips to the kitchens.

the mandrake leaves james stole that they had to keep in their mouths for an entire month, and her crying from frustration if she failed. the silvery glow of the full moon while they stared out onto the grounds until morning, waiting for when they could run to the hospital wing.

the precious time spent with lily. study sessions turned to giggles and long conversations. the two of them were thick as thieves, and lucy never pushed her to james. in fact, she smacked her in the back of the head when she admitted her feelings for him. lily evans loved kate bush and the grease soundtrack. she showed her the muggle way of life—which lucy adored.

she found sisters within alice, marlene, and dorcas. alice was bold behind her sweet face and gave the best advice. marlene had everyone wrapped around her finger in the best possible way. dorcas had a quiet charm, similar to remus’, and she was unspeakably in love with marlene... who in turn was unspeakably in love with dorcas.

her brother flirting with lily. lucy would race him through the halls, from filch, and whoever was caught would take the fall. their strange twin code of conduct, their togetherness and alliance to each other—only broken by trying to push each other off of brooms at quidditch practice. he was protective, but never smothered her. she remembered them crying from happiness when they finally were able to transform into their animagi forms. they had a very similar laugh. james was her ride-or-die.

convincing peter to let her pierce his ear. scrawled notes being passed through class—he was a great confidant, and she would hold his secrets just as well. she had punched snape in the face, she had lost her control, just because he had brought peter’s name up. he was great at charms, great at giving advice.

laying on remus’ shoulder after the full moon, reading the same book with him, even if he had to pause while she finished the page. sharing snacks, genuine, true laughter and happiness, and giving him innocent, feather-light kisses on his facial scars to make him smile. rambling conversations, messy notes hidden between pages of books and under pillows. his ability to separate her from the trouble they found.

and...

muggle rock music. cigarettes. making his family’s lives hell. barked laughter and stupid dares. he always insisted she was his favorite potter—unless she worked with the other boys against him. the promise of forming a band. when he grabbed her wrists and shushed her—she’d ruin their cover, they were supposed to be hiding from filch. the cold hands in hers while they ran from the scene of the crime.

crime.

and she was back in reality, sitting in remus’ office with him while he planned lessons.

“do you remember the mandrake leaves?” she had asked, in a very small voice, as if he wouldn’t remember, though she knew it was impossible for him to forget.

remus ran a hand over his face.

“i remember well, lucy,” he sighed. “you were too hard on yourself.”

swallowing, and willing her voice not to shake, she stared at him before speaking.

“we all were... but he was harder on himself, remember? he would get mad, start kicking things and trying not to cry.”

remus lupin’s eyes were far away.

it hurt him too.

eventually, they walked to the great hall for dinner.

harry potter wanted to put together the pieces.

a black dog. the black dog.

he had seen that dog, he had gotten the grim, and it was their new professor’s greatest fear?

he knew the expression on her face—it was the one he, himself, wore when he was scared.

harry wanted to believe in coincidences, but doing that when he was harry potter wasn’t the best idea.

“professor vulpes,” ron began, from his seat on the couch. “she’s kind of fit, isn’t she?”

hermione sighed, rolling her eyes. “honestly, ronald, of all the things... i’m confused as to why she’s even here.”

harry raised an eyebrow at her.

“well,” hermione began, sounding very slightly unsure. “i’m sure if dumbledore thinks it’s smart for her to be here, it must be alright... but we’ve never needed two professors for one class.”

“i mean, he said she’s helping lupin, isn’t he?” harry added. “i like professor lupin, i feel like he’ll be the best teacher we’ve had. and vulpes... she seems nice, too.”

“i agree,” hermione told him, hastily. “it’s just that it seems a bit weird, is all...”

“she seemed to know lupin pretty well,” ron commented. harry and hermione looked over.

“well, it just seems like they’re familiar with each other. they’re in perfect step with each other, almost, did you notice? they watch each other. and why did she run in front of harry like that?”

“i dunno,” harry grumbled. “maybe trying to save me from embarrassment?”

hermione rolled her eyes. “or, she could be trying to help you?”

“i don’t know,” harry still had a twinge of bitterness in his tone. “she seems familiar to me, though.”

“hmm.”

[boxofbadaddiction]

Claw Marks

Remus Lupin

No Pairing

Reader Insert - Gender Neutral.

Imagine: Remus finding out one of his students is a Werewolf.

Warnings: IDK...werewolves?

He hadn't picked up on it at first, too occupied with keeping his own 'condition' a secret and, more importantly, under control.

Remaining unknowingly oblivious to the subtle signs they'd been showing.

How fidgety and agitated they'd become around the time of the full moon, often lashing out for no reason - even at close friends. How they seemed incapable of staying awake during breakfast or morning classes. Of the often many fresh cuts that littered their skin. All signs went unnoticed.

Until one fateful day when it all seemed to crash over him like a bucket of ice water.

The class started as normal as any other Thursday; with the exception of Y/n needing to be awoken at their desk.

A sharp jab to their elbow was enough to send their arm off balance, chin falling from it's place against their palm, the sudden drop of y/ns head waking them with a slight fright.

"Thank you for that, Miss Bell. Good Morning, Y/n. I do wish you'd save all sleeping for Professor Binns class rather than before I've even begun my lesson." Remus says sarcastically. "Sorry Professor." Y/n mumbled in reply sitting at attention. "Excellent. Although thankfully, given today's topic, I don't believe any of you will be at risk of nodding off."

The class shared an amused chuckle while y/n merely managed a tight lipped smile.

There was a brief knock at the door as Professor Flitwick and Mr Filch entered the room with a large, rattling, wardrobe.

"Perfect timing!" Lupin spoke as the cupboard was deposited at the front of the class and the students were made to stand as the teachers cleared all their desks to the sides of the room. "Today, class, we will be learning about Boggarts."

After a quick introduction of what a Boggart is and how to repel one, the students were made to form a line. As the music carried out it's loud melody and their turn inevitably drew near y/ns body filled with dread.

They hesitated, not wanting to step any closer to the creature in fear their secret be revealed, but with a nudge from the person behind them and encouragement from Professor Lupin they did.

The Boggart took it's time analysing the new arrival before finally transforming. In it's place now stood a great snarling beast with glowing yellow eyes and gruesome, bared, teeth.

Y/n froze. As did many members of the class all of whom drew a sharp breath at the sight. It were truly terrifying.

Y/ns expression bore one of pure fear. Face turning pale as the blood rushed from their head. Shock took over Lupin as well, not having expected one of his students to produce a nightmare quite so frightening. The nightmare he were forcibly living.

Remus took a step forward readying to intervene as he noted the way y/ns wand arm shook in fear.

But to his surprise, with their eyes squeezing tightly shut and head turning back over their shoulder, y/n shouts quickly "Ridikulus!" casting the charm.

The approaching beast is suddenly changed; now in a vivid pink tutu, aimlessly cycling in circles on a miniature tricycle, the image completed by a multicoloured party hat upon it's head.

The previously stunned class erupts into a fit of laughter. The sound filling y/n with enough courage to look back at the scene playing out before them. An astonished and relieved sigh falls from their mouth before joining in and laughing with the class.

Lupin is beyond impressed, barely able to contain his excitement he yells, "BRILLIANT, Y/n! Truly brilliant! NEXT!" His joy however, is short lived as all that previous worry that'd clouded his mind is brought rushing back.

Y/n spun excitedly in place, smiling widely, their robes shifting with the momentum to reveal a large scar from the base of their neck, presumably, stretching right along to their shoulder as it traced their collarbone. Claw marks. Unmistakably - claw marks.

Lupins face drops briefly before he's quickly painting back on a fake smile. After that the signs weren't so subtle anymore.

Not wanting to get ahead of himself and draw wrong conclusions he confronts Dumbledore with his suspicions.

"Headmaster, I wondered if I might be able to have a word?"

"Of course, Remus. You may have more than one if you so desire." Dumbledore responds from his place at his desk, looking down over his half-moon glasses with a grin.

"It's about a student of my 5th year class...y/n y/l/n?" "Ah, yes." Lupin watches Albus expectantly but he does not continue so Remus does, "I couldn't help but notice they possess certain qualities that are remarkably similar to my own." Dumbledore nods in acknowledgement but remains silent. "Would I be out of my depth in assuming they-that they're..." "like you are?" The Headmaster finishes for him. Remus swallows thickly as he watches him intently.

"You would not. Be out of depth, that is. Y/n is indeed a Werewolf."

Remus takes a deep breath. He knew he was right in his assumptions but to hear it be confirmed is a different thing entirely. Like a truth one would never hope to be true. A flood of emotions overtakes him; some shock. Sympathy and sadness - as he knows what they are going through. And quite a bit of anger towards the man infront of him.

"You didn't think it necessary to inform me of this?" He glares. "That would have been against their, and their parents, wishes. When they told me of y/ns condition they were adamant in no one else knowing - less word spread, I agreed to respect their wish so I couldn't tell you. Were you to discover this on your own however-" "so you've just been sitting around waiting for me to piece the puzzle together?" "To be frank, Remus, I'm rather surprised it took you this long."

Anger and frustration are bubbling over in Lupin at this point as he turns his back on Albus. It's taking all his strength not to lash out at the old man like he desperately wants to.

"They're taking necessary precautions, Remus, if that is what's troubling you." "No, Headmaster. What's troubling me is that they are suffering with this condition on their own." He speaks through gritted teeth. "Yes, I have an idea of how unpleasant it must be." That comment alone pushes Remus' temper to it's limit.

"With all due respect, Albus..." he turns back to face him with daggers held behind his eyes, "you have no idea. You could not possibly imagine the difficulty of enduring the effects of lycanthropy - especially not at such a young age."

"Do you forget who assisted you in your transformations during school?"

"I do not, Professor. Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs helped me through every full moon. Although you may have offered a place to do so safely, you did not assist me in my change. It were James, Sirius and Peter who were there for me. And if what you say is true - that you are the only person in this school who knows - y/n doesn't even have that. A fact of which I am truly sorry for."

Not waiting for a response Remus storms from Dumbledores office.

As the next full moon approaches Remus prepares himself for the night. Locking himself in his office and drinking the Wolfsbane potion Severus prepared for him to make the change a little easier.

As the sun sets for the day he watches as the final rays disappearing beneath the horizon paint the Black Lake in brilliant hues of gold and cream. It's a picture perfect scene when something suddenly draws his attention.

A student decending into the forbidden forest. Y/n.

His body urges him to follow, but in little time he'll be in no position to offer help and, given the fact his theories have been proven correct, y/n will be in no state to accept.

When morning dawns he resumes his place by the window, mind fixed on only one thing. One person. The same person whom he witnesses hobbling back out of the forest along the very path they'd entered.

That day he calls y/n into his office and explains everything. How he found out. How he's the same. How he can help.

Y/n breaks down in front of him. Years of carrying this weight on such young shoulders finally met it's peak and took it's toll.

That night Remus offers Y/n the goblet of Wolfsbane to make the transition a little easier. It'll be the first time they get to change without suffering an excruciating amount of pain. It'll also be the first time in months Remus will be forced to endure it.

The change that night as the moon rises would be different than any before...

"Remus, have you taken your potion tonight?" Sirius grips his shoulders tightly as he speaks the words frantically. "You know the man you truly are, Remus. This heart is where you truly lie. This heart here." Padfoot beats against Moonys chest as he watches his features slowly morph into the grotesque creature that forever lurkes within.

All words are dull in Remus' ears as the pain blinds his senses and he feels himself start to lose control.

The image of Y/n is the last thing to flash before his eyes and at least his mind is eased in the knowledge that, for the first time, their transformation will be bearable.

A final comforting thought before the beast inevitably takes over.

[sweet-barnes]

Those Heels - b.b

Pairing: Bucky x tall!Reader (modern au)

Summary: You found your family in university and they had never left your side, and even after all these years the ‘surprise’ birthday parties are still going strong. Bucky finally decided it’s the right night to go after the girl.

A/N: i’m really bad with summaries, i apologise for whatever that is lmao thank you to @invisibleanonymousmonsters and @writingsoftheloser for helping out with ideas/concepts when writing a tall!reader, i appreciate it💕

You were grateful for your friends, there was no denying that. They were such a big part of your life since the day you had met, you knew you would be a completely different person altogether without them.

It had all started at university, in the student accommodation where you were all put on the same floor by some miracle. You met Natasha first, you had walked into your assigned room and she was already laying out paint samples ready for decorating. You knew from then on you were going to be in trouble with her. It wasn't long before she was introducing you to the rest of her group, and there was a lot of them.

The girls were in the rooms that surrounded you, so you naturally met them first. Wanda, Nakia, Peggy and Okoye were the sweetest bunch you had ever met and you instantly felt part of their little family. 

Next were the boys, all which you met at the party that was thrown at Tony's house. Natasha had explained to you on the way that he was the ‘rich one’ so he refused to stay in student digs. Instead residing in his dad’s mansion near the university and one of his many expensive cars in every day. 

Once you arrived at his place, you were blown away. You had only seen houses like these in passing, never did you think you would be invited to a party in one. The huge windows indented in the pristine white walls showed off the colourful lights inside and the masses of people who were already in there.  

The music could be heard thrumming from outside and as you all piled out of the car, you were pulled towards the entrance by Wanda.

Inside is where you met the rest of your family, unbeknownst to them. From Steve Rogers to Peter Quill, T'Challa to Tony Stark. There were so many people, you didn't think you could keep track of them all, but now you knew them like the back of your hand.

The one person who definitely stuck in your mind was the one brooding in the corner. His fluffy dark hair and his piercing blue eyes took your breath away as soon as you were introduced to him. 

Bucky Barnes had your heart from the moment you set eyes on him, but that dream was soon shattered by the small blonde that sidled up to him, wrapping an arm around his waist and placing her head against his arm. 

You knew from then on you never stood a chance with him, and the countless other girls he introduced to the group just clarified that. You gave up on that dream quickly, promising yourself you wouldn't get too close to him for your heart to break.

Very soon after that, you may have let your secret crush on him slip to the girls. Of course they freaked out but you soon shot them down, not wanting them to get your own hopes up for something that wasn't going to happen. The way you said "he only likes small girls" gave away to them how you really felt and they tried their hardest to make you see it from their view, but it was no use. 

They were all so petite, yet so strong and powerful in the way they held themselves. They would never understand how you felt within yourself.  It wasn't that you didn't think you were strong and powerful, you knew as a woman you had your place in this world to do your bit for the better. You just weren't petite like them. You were at least a head taller and you felt like you didn't belong.

Despite the sharing your insecurities one drunken night at fresher’s, the girls never let go of you. Your friendship with them, even though it was only 5 days old at the time, was too precious for them to lose. That still stood 11 years later.

--

You placed the jumpsuit in front of your body, looking it up and down in the mirror before throwing it back down on the bed. "Are you excited?" Natasha asked as she walked into the room, a black body con dress hugging her body. You let out a groan, plopping back onto your bed. "Am I ever excited for one of Tony's parties?"

Tony was still rich, of course he was, he was a genius. His habit of having parties at every possible opportunity had never wavered, and birthday's were no exception to that rule. A 'surprise' birthday party was thrown every year for everyone within the group, even though all of you knew it was coming, it was like clockwork.

Everyone else loved it, you on the other hand, would rather be curled up on the sofa with a tub of Ben and Jerry's watching Netflix. You couldn't exactly avoid this one, it was your birthday and this party was especially for you.

The girls had taken you shopping earlier that day, which had already set your anxiety off. You hated clothes shopping and even though they tried their hardest to get you to buy a nice dress for the evening, you still arrived home with a jumpsuit, a classic look for you. There was no way you were going to a party that you were already uncomfortable with and making that worse with a dress.

"I'm sure you'll enjoy it once you get there," Natasha sat next to you and that's when you noticed the gift bag in her hand. "Nat, I told you I didn't want anything," you gave her a look before flitting your eyes down to the sparkly bag, curious to see what was inside. 

"I know but I couldn't not get my best friend something for her birthday, and it's a bit of a risky present if I'm honest but I would really appreciate it if you maybe wore them tonight?" Your mind was all over the place trying to think of what it could possibly be. Natasha pushed the bag towards you and you didn't waste any time in pulling out the tissue paper to reveal what was inside.

You lifted the shoes out, or should you say heels, and turned them slightly to inspect them. "Do you like them?" Natasha whispered next to you, leaning in slightly. They were black, thick straps along the top and around the ankle, with a small chunky heel and a slight platform.

They were pretty, you couldn't deny it, and they were just your style. "Yes," you breathed out. Without thinking, you shooed Natasha out, telling her you would be two minutes before changing into your outfit and putting on the shoes.

You stared at your figure in the mirror, the jumpsuit hugging in at your waist and stopping just above your ankles, showing off the straps on the heels perfectly. There was a slight plunge neckline, showing off your chest just enough that you didn't feel completely ridiculous. 

"Oh my god," that was when you heard the murmuring from the doorway and you turned to see all your girls stood there, mouths dropping at the sight of you.

"You look gorgeous!" Wanda squealed, making everyone laugh. Every one joined in with the compliments and you felt the heat rising to your cheeks at all the attention you were getting. 

"Don't we have a party to get to?" You questioned, attempting to stop the onslaught of comments. It worked in your favour and soon, you were all piling into a taxi, making your way to another of Tony's mansions.

You felt the base through the floor as you stepped in through the double doors. You looked around at the familiar faces, shooting back a thank you every time someone greeted you with a 'happy birthday.' Most of these people were just acquaintances, people your group had met along the way and had been nice enough to be invited to one of the parties. 

To be honest, Tony just liked having a lot of people at his parties. 

You all weaved your way through the crowds of people, picking up your drinks in the kitchen and making your into one of the large back rooms. Every one you knew and loved was in there and as soon as they saw you, a chorus of happy birthday's was shouted in your direction.

You couldn't help the giggle that erupted from you as you went in to give everyone a hug, all their grips strong on you as they pulled you into them. "You're getting old now," Sam joked, grabbing you around the waist and pulling you into his side. You gasped, "hey, that's rude," you gave him a light slap on his chest before laughing along with him.

You looked around at the small circle your friends had formed, consisting of Natasha, Nakia, Steve, Sam and Bucky. Your eyes scanned them all, taking in the joyous looks on their faces before your eyes landed on Bucky. 

Your heart leapt as you locked eyes with him, a smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth as he looked you up and down.

A wave of self-consciousness fell over you and you felt yourself retreating slightly into Sam's side. You sent Bucky a quick smile before looking back at Steve to try and concentrate on the story he was telling.

And the night went on like that. Flitting between different groups of your friends, trying not to feel out of place. 

You had noticed a few glances from people as you were taking photos, especially with the girls. It was now just natural for you to bend your knees slightly when taking selfies with them, you had been doing it since you had first met but clearly other people weren't used to it. You tried to ignore them the best you could but with the more alcohol you consumed, the more irritating it became.

You were at the bar again, ordering another drink when you felt the presence of someone beside you. Their musky vanilla smell hit you, and you recognised it instantly. 

"You look really good tonight, Y/N." His voice was husky and you could tell he'd been drinking. You looked to your side, taking in his sculpted face next to you. "Do you not have some small blonde with you tonight?" You attempted to joke but you truly meant it. Bucky chuckled, "not this time, got my eye on someone else."

You rolled your eyes, taking the drink that had just been placed in front of you, not saying anything else.

"I noticed you were wearing heels, that's a-" Bucky was cut of by a sharp "hey." You both turned to see Nakia stood behind you, a stern look directed straight at Bucky. She was the wrong person to mess with and clearly Bucky had pissed her off. 

"You do not say anything about her heels, do you understand Barnes?" She pointed a finger at him, nudging him slightly and the bewildered look on his face nearly made you laugh. "What? I wasn't going to say anything-" She cut him off again. "I heard you, James," you took the opportunity to sneak away, hearing their voices fading as Bucky was trying to defend himself against her.

If there was anyone that would stick up for you, Nakia was the best for it, everyone listened to her and they didn’t dare try to disagree. You slipped out onto the balcony, grateful for the cool evening air against your hot skin. You took another sip of your drink and the alcohol burned slightly as it went down.

Of course it was Bucky who would point out the heels. He just couldn't help himself. For someone who was so good with the ladies, he definitely didn't know how to talk to one. Or talk to you at least.

The door behind you slid open, letting out the loud music before muting it again as it closed. "Y/N?" Bucky's voice was soft and you turned to meet his nervous stance. "Look, I'm really sorry about what I said back there, Nakia explained it and I really didn't mean it to come across any type of way," his was wringing his hands together as he looked at you. 

You let out a sigh, "it's okay, Buck, I know you didn't mean any harm." His womaniser demeanor was gone as he moved to stand next to you. A moment passed before he spoke again, "I was going to say you look really hot actually," chuckling at himself. 

Your heart stopped, questioning whether he really just said that. "And I'm not just saying that to sleep with you, I know you think I'm like that sometimes but I wouldn't do that to you."

You eventually found your voice, looking into Bucky's hopeful eyes as he tried to read your thoughts. "I'm not like any other girl you've ever been with Bucky, why now?" There was a shift in the way he looked at you before he looked down. 

"Since the first day I met you at Tony's party, 11 years ago, I knew I felt something for you. I was just a dick and I slept around too much and I knew you didn't like it, I could tell by the way you looked at each new girl whenever I showed up with one. Then you became more and more distant, I knew it would be harder to get to you and make you see how I felt so I thought it was better to leave it," he paused, taking a deep breath. Your mind was all over the place, not knowing what to say or do, but Bucky carried on anyway.

"But I've stopped that now, I've been single for about a year and I was hoping you'd see that and see I'm not the guy that you thought I was but I guess that was a stupid plan." You laughed a little at this and Bucky joined in. "I was going to ask if you'd like to dance with me?" 

Your mouth was already agreeing to it before you could fully process what was happening. Bucky took your hand in his, leading you back inside and into the cleared area that had become the dancefloor. A slow song had started playing and couples were paired together around you. 

As you walked into the centre with Bucky, you felt eyes from all over the room looking at you. Your gaze landed on Natasha's over the shoulder of Bruce, she sent you a wink before a big smile broke out onto her face. She knew your feelings for Bucky never truly faded and she couldn't help the happiness she felt at seeing you two finally together now.

Bucky turned to face you, his arms snaking around your waist, pulling you close to him while your arms went over his shoulders. "Is this alright?" He whispered, his blue eyes sparkling even in the low light, as you looked across at him. You simply hummed in response, nodding slightly. 

No one said anything. Your skin was on fire from where his arms were touching you, even through your clothes and a feeling of serenity washed over you. It was like everyone else in the room melted away and it was just you and Bucky dancing alone. No more eyes prying into your business or making you feel small.

"This is nice," you said softly, Bucky placed his forehead on yours, closing the distance even further. You felt yourself becoming flustered and moved your head to rest on his shoulder instead. He moved your body so it was flush against his. "I could do this forever," he murmured into your hair. "How have I been missing out this long?" 

You were sure he was talking to himself at this point but you couldn't help yourself, "well... if you hadn't screwed all those other girls-" 

You were cut off by his hands moving to tickle your waist, his laugh mixing with yours as you tried to get away. "No, you're not going anywhere," he tried to grab you again but you were too quick. 

"Just watch me, Barnes!" You shouted, slipping away into the crowd. Bucky shook his head at you, pausing for a second to watch your figure disappear. 

“Why did I wait so long?” He whispered to himself, before running into the crowd after you.

[mattzerella-sticks]

⭐2020 Fics in Review ⭐

Happy New Year’s Eve! 💫💫💫 2020 sure was a year... between everything that was happening on the macro (the pandemic, elections, etc.) and on the micro-level (shows delayed, some ending - disastrously, so much drama, etc.), the past 12 months felt like a blur. Especially since we’ve been inside and realized time is an illusion!

But, there were moments where I was able to ground myself in the present and not be swept away by the tide. Most of them were because of fanfiction. Whether writing or reading, fanworks became a soothing balm. And I’d be remiss (and breaking tradition) if I didn’t reflect on my past works of 2020! 

I’ve written 43 fics across a wide array of fandoms - the most being Supernatural, with 9-1-1, DC Comics, Marvel, Boku No Hero Academia, Stargirl, Star Wars, Hollywood, and RWBY sprinkled in. I really branched out this year, and am looking forward to what I will write in 2021. Maybe new fandoms? Maybe an original work? Who’s to say!

Thank you to all those who’ve read my works, and am grateful for both your support and continued engagement - can’t wait to see you in 2021 with me 😁

Here are my works!

9-1-1 (TV Show)

Caught (Evan ‘Buck’ Buckely/Eddie Diaz, side Athena Grant/Bobby Nash, side Maddie Buckley/Howie ‘Chimney’ Han)

Photobooths are prime for catching special moments and making them last forever, even if they are less both and more open spaces with a backdrop. When Athena, Bobby, and Michael stumble upon one such moment between Buck and Eddie, what will they do?

And how will it affect Maddie and Chimney?

Lumped Together (Evan ‘Buck’ Buckely/Eddie Diaz, side Henrietta ‘Hen’ Wilson/Karen Wilson, side Maddie Buckley/Howie ‘Chimney’ Han)

As an apology for keeping her thoughts about medical school secret from her wife and partner, Hen takes them (and Maddie) out for lunch. With the promise that it would only be them. And for the most part it was. Until Buck and Eddie strode in with every intention of eating Takoyaki.

Just not with them.

Armed with new information, what's a girl to do? Hen spends the next day fighting back the natural instinct to tease her friends about the wonderful step they've taken together in their relationship. Can she make it home without saying anything? Or will she give in?

DCU

Lonely Together (Barry Allen/Bruce Wayne, past Barry Allen/Iris West, past Bruce Wayne/Selina Kyle)

Barry needs others, yet whether by his enemies or his own actions, he ends up alone. After Iris leaves him, Barry feels as if he drifts through life. Like lightning humming in the air without a rod to ground him.

Until he struck another lonely soul and entered a relationship he never thought possible. Now, months since he and Bruce began sleeping with each other, Barry feels settles. At peace in a way he hasn't felt in a long while. Since he and Iris started petering out.

But it's not love... is it?

Come Home (Jason Todd/Kyle Rayner)

Jason Todd gets a message from Bruce. He's surprised to see it. Then, he's surprised by the message itself. Hearing Bruce's final message stirs something inside of him, urging him towards a place he's avoided ever since his and Bruce's falling out. So he gathers his things, and then... waits.

He can't leave yet. Jason doesn't know why. Bruce gave him a mission, just like old times. Except it's not, because he... Jason can't move. Can't even stand.

That's how Kyle finds him.

Restless (Barry Allen/Bruce Wayne)

Returning home from a mission in outer space, the team picks up a distress signal off-course. They rush off to help, landing on a strange alient planet teeming with life. Especially within the plant kingdom.

While guarding the Javelin, Bruce and Barry encounter one such member while engaging in some familiar fight-flirting. Will its effects spell trouble for the League, or help these two relax their guards long enough to explore new possibilities?

(Hint: It's a little bit of both)

Marvel

Hot Seat (Peter Parker/Johnny Storm)

Spiderman likes Johnny. Like likes him. And he thought Johnny felt the same. He wasn't wrong, but Johnny like liked someone else, too. Someone he actually wanted to pursue, over Spiderman.

Unfortunately that someone is Peter Parker.

However, after a terrible misunderstanding, Johny isn't too keen on seeing either Peter or Spiderman; the longer this confusion left unresolved, the more Johnny's hurt would fester. Can Peter find a way to make Johnny listen?

Hollywood 

Merrily We Roll Along (Archie Coleman/Rock Hudson)

With their careers still on the rise and no peak in sight, sometimes Archie's and Roy's lives get a little too busy. Understandably so. Archie's in the midst of writing his next screenplay while the latest opens across America. Roy spend more time on set than at home working on his latest project. When their schedules allow it, all they want is to be together.

Can they enjoy a simple morning together, or will the clouds of Hollywood cast a heavy shadow over their sunny day?

RWBY

Lucky You, Huh? (Qrow Branwen/Clover Ebi)

After all that happened, it's time for the dust to settle. Choices were made. Now, the consequences for certain actions need to be carried out.

Even though he fought alongside her to save Mantle, Robyn Hill couldn't help save Clover from the whims of the Council. Without a job or home, Clover needs to find a way to carry on.

If anyone understands what that feels like, it's Qrow. Never being one who can communicate his feelings well, would he be the best to comfort the other man. When he's the only one who can, what does that mean for Clover?

Star Wars

Fourth (Poe Dameron/Finn)

What's a man and his co-general to do when they're on a mission together on a planet known for frequent sandstorms?

Flirt? That is a possibility. And definitely the one they take.

Stargirl

I’m Here (Courtney Whitmore/Yolanda Montez, past Yolanda Montez/Henry King, Jr.)

Coda to 1x10 "Brainwave Jr."

Losing Henry was sad, but it's not the first person Courtney knew whose future was snatched by the Injustice Society of America. That doesn't make his death any less tragic. It does remind Courtney how screwed up and dangerous her life was. At least she was able to wake up the next day and keep moving. And so was Beth, and Rick. But Yolanda...

Where was Yolanda? Courtney needs to know.

Crusher (Lawrence Crock/Paula Crock, Pat Dugan/Barbara Whitmore, Lawrence Crock/Pat Dugan)

When Lawrence met Pat, he saw another body that could benefit from some exercise at his gym. The more they interacted, became friends, he saw that body doing other things in other places. And his wife is totally supportive of this. While in the midst of an afterhours training session, Lawrence drags his feet on telling his friend a few important things. Egged on by Paula, will he say what's on his mind? How will Pat react?

And does Pat have a secret or two of his own?

Boku No Hero Academia/My Hero Academia

Little Secrets Everywhere (Bakugou Katsuki/Kirishima Eijiro)

Mina thought letting Bakugo read whatever was in her folder wouldn't be too bad. Maybe he would snipe at her for her less than perfect English translation and sentence structure, slap her on the head with the balled up assignment. What she wasn't expecting was for him to charge with hellish fury towards her in the common room with all their friends to see.

One careless mistake leads to many things coming to light. Everyone walking away with something new to think about.

Boku No Fundanshi (Bakugou Katsuki/Kirishima Eijiro)

Bakugo Katsuki is a top student at the premier hero academy in the world. Bakugo Katsuki is a boy with the ability to use his sweat as a weapon, each droplet containing enough nitroglycerin to obliterate a phone book. Bakugo Katsuki enjoys reading manga where boys fall in love with one another. Two out of the three are commonly accepted facts. The final one is a heavily guarded secret that Bakugo protects with his life. At least until his vigilance lapses, and he loses a doujinshi.

Will he be able to recover what he lost before anyone realizes it's his? Or, by the end of this, will he have found something he didn't know he was missing?

Portmanteau (Bakugou Katsuki/Kirishima Eijiro)

Portmanteau (port·man·teau) n. a word blending the sounds and combining the meanings of two others

Like Bakugo's chosen hero name. But was that his first choice? Kirishima doesn't think so, after finding a damning piece of evidence hidden within his notes. Except it's not what he thinks, at all...

Supernatural

 Real (Dean Winchester/Castiel, background Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester)

Coda to 15x09 "The Trap"

Morning after, and Sam spies a little something blossoming in the kitchen. Something that stokes the fires of his curiosity. When the scene ends, he walks in with an intent to investigate. Learn about the strange magic that happened before his eyes. How quickly Dean and Cas's relationship repaired. And what brilliant new shape it took on after Purgatory.

Will Sam be satisfied with the answer?

Half-Priced Chocolates (Dean Winchester/Castiel, background Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester)

The day after Valentine's Day is great for many things. Basking in the glow of a night well spent, sharing the joy of love with your family, and eating chocolate priced considerably lower than it was the day before.

Except Sam can't enjoy any of that, because Dean won't let him. Because Dean woke up in a sour mood and has picked up the banners of war against romantic love.

Albeit, the three aforementioned things might make his conflict the shortest in history.

Spill (Dean Winchester/Castiel)

Dean always thought it would take more to force him into retirement. Yet here he is, locked in the Bunker until the world figures out a cure for a deadly virus. It could be worse - at least they have a home. He cannot imagine how worse it would be if this happened years earlier, where he and Sam were trapped in a tiny motel room together. Here they have options, and miles of outdoor space they can stroll through if their options become stale.

And they were beginning to. Dean could only do so much indoors. Dean knew he needed to shake things up, but couldn't begin thinking how. Luckily Castiel has an idea, and gives him a new way of looking at their kitchen.

Supernatural Crack🩹tober

Following the Supernatural Cracktober prompt list, one day at a time.

Prompts will be listed in the notes and the chapter title.

Enjoy!

Bullets Over the Bayou (Dean Winchester/Castiel)

Everyone wants Castiel Novak to quit the force, including Castiel. But he stays on despite the toxic work environment he’s surrounded by. Still believing he can do some good despite the many lines of red tape impeding him. Luckily, a pair of scissors by the name of Dean Winchester drops into his hands, and he finally feels like he can do some good.

Dean Winchester thought he would be in New Orleans for a day or two. Identify the body of his deadbeat father and then move on. No one knows he’s here. His mother and brother are blissfully unaware of the danger his father roped him into. With a parting gift of a journal, delivered to him the same day he received word about his father, Dean has become the target of a group of people who want him dead. The same people who killed his father.

Racing against the clock, can Dean and Castiel figure out what is so important about John Winchester’s journal that someone would kill for it?

Kick Ball Change (Dean Winchester/Castiel, background Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester)

Coda to 15x10 "The Heroes' Journey"

Dean has the Bunker to himself at a time after he and Sam regain their supernatural abilities. With nothing needing his attention, he decides taking time for himself wouldn't hurt. But the usual fare leaves him bored and tired.

So he tries something new. Something he wanted to try, but wasn't sure he would be good at. Dean starts off strong, but doing it on your own can only be so fun. Get you so far. Luckily a partner happens by and truly allows Dean to enjoy a part of himself he knew was there, but didn't want to share.

Tempered Desires (Dean Winchester/Castiel, background Charlie Bradbury/OC, background Sam Winchester/Jessica Moore, background Sam Winchester/Ruby, background Sam Winchester/Mick Davies, past Dean Winchester/Arthur Ketch)

Dating, sex, and finding love were the farthest things on the minds of both Dean and Castiel. There were more important things to worry about - namely the pandemic that swept across the globe and changed everything. Navigating this new environment was hard enough without adding romance.

But fate never intervenes when you expect. From first meetings to first dates, we'll see how Dean and Castiel's relationship blossoms despite the circumstances.

Sunrise (Dean Winchester/Castiel, background Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester)

Dean and Sam were free. Finally, unequivocally, free.

But this wasn't the happy ending Dean had expected. Maybe in the past, having Sam in the passenger seat tearing across an open stretch of highway as the sunsets, it'd be what he wanted. But that was years ago. He's not that man anymore. Dean's tired of sunsets, of saying goodbye. He yearns for a different ending. One that's less of an ending, and more of a beginning. A sunrise instead of a sunset.

Sam has his. Dean lost his. Despite this setback, he won't stop. He'll live in memory of his sunrise.

Except, what can he do when he feels those rays on his face again?

Coda to 15x19

Fixing It (Dean Winchester/Castiel, background Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester)

Dean Winchester walked a long & difficult road. House burning down when he was 4, constantly being on the move until his father lost a fight with demons at the age of 25. Reunited with his mother only to lose her again. Have a son only to lose him, too. Of all the shadows that have crossed his path, he thought one of the main sources of light was his husband Castiel.

But he had to ruin that, too.

Can he ever have that shine again? Or are there things that are too good for him to hold? Will they mend what was broken?

Heart in My Hand (Dean Winchester/Castiel, background Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester)

He was right there.

Cas was telling Dean everything he ever wanted to hear since meeting the angel of the Lord... only each and every word of his confession stabbed at Dean's heart. Because once he finished, there's no more time for them. For him. For any chance of happiness - all that taken away by the Empty. And now he has to carry on.

He tries. Stands, gets in his car and drives where Sam tells him. When he meets with the others, though...

Coda to 15x18 "Despair"

A Dumb Idea (Dean Winchester/Castiel)

They celebrated Christmas, Halloween, Thanksgiving, birthdays, even the Fourth of July. What about the other holidays? What about Valentine's Day?

Mrs. Butters actually had a plan for that, but she left before it could come to fruition. Sam, however, stumbles on Dean and a leftover piece from said plan. Something Dean would rather Sam not see. When he does get a peek as to what it is, well... Dean and Sam have a lot to talk about.

Coda to 15x14 "The Last Holiday"

What the Water Gave Him (Dean Winchester/Castiel)

It was over. Chuck lost, Sam and Dean can live their lives how they want them. But their victory wasn't without losses. The biggest upset nearly taking Dean out of the game, happening so close to the final battle. Now he's on the other side, alive against all odds, but Sam knows he isn't happy. Not truly happy since the Empty stole his best friend.

But there's a chance they can save him. A slim chance. A risk that Dean's willing to take despite every logical nerve in Sam's body screaming at him to look for better options. That threading a needle this small is too dangerous. That they don't have to take on another big bad, not anymore. That they don't have to risk their lives anymore. Dean is far past the point of listening. Dead set on this mission, Sam can only watch.

And pray his brother proves him wrong.

(Now with art from gabester-sketch)

Acutely (Dean Winchester/Castiel)

Jack said he's sorry, after getting his soul back.

Jack said he's sorry, and he's looking at Dean. They're all looking at Dean.

Jack said he's sorry, and Dean can't take it. It's too much. Like a frog thrown into a boiling pot he hops out, jumping out from the room towards safety. Doing his best not to succumb to the pain.

He can't hide forever, let the wounds fester. It's too much to deal with on his own, though. Can someone help him through it?

Leeches (Dean Winchester/Castiel)

Sharing a Netflix makes sense, in hindsight. Dean gets it. But that doesn't mean he appreciates seeing a bunch of profiles after his that weren't there last he checked.

He's gonna get to the bottom of this - of when this happened, why, and how they were able to guess his password.

Revival (Dean Winchester/Castiel, Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester)

Sam and Dean stand there on the bridge, the camera panning out on them as they are finally reunited in Heaven.

But then Sam wakes up.

(Coda/Fix-It Fic to 15x20 "Carry On")

Memento (Dean Winchester/Castiel)

Why did Castiel have a photo of himself in a cowboy hat? Where did he get it? Who took it, and more importantly who gave it to him?

Coda to 15x15 "Gimme Shelter"

The End (We Deserve) (Dean Winchester/Castiel)

Dean Winchester dies in Sam's arms.

And then he doesn't.

(How that scene originally looked...)

Constants

Meeting with alternate versions of themselves makes Sam and Dean think about what the landscape of the former multiverse might have looked like - or, really, "If there can be multiple Deans and multiple Sams, can there be other versions of things they know. Like... Baby?"

Dean says no. There's only one Baby. She's got four wheels, black paint, and has been his from the beginning. Sam thinks otherwise.

Let's explore what the possibilities of Deans, Sams, and Babys in different universes might look like.

Enjoy the Present (Dean Winchester/Castiel)

Sam had a birthday, Jack had a birthday...

It would only be fitting for Dean to have one, too. It's expected, really. Yet the one Sam and Jack throw him still catches him by surprise. Maybe because he actually agreed with Butters, about having outgrowned birthdays. Or because his thoughts were pulled elsewhere because of some disappointing news.

If it's the latter, than a birthday will definitely take his mind off of that. Especially when it comes time for his present.

Coda to 15x14 'The Last Holiday'

Swallow It Whole (Dean Winchester/Castiel)

"The older you get... the less lies make everything better"

But when you've told as many lies as Dean has, it's hard to tell what's true and what's not. How can he remove all the rotten parts of himself without bringing everything down? Which lies have ingrained themselves so firmly, that removing them would change everything about who he was?

And, scariest of them all, who would he be without those lies?

Coda to 15x16 "Drag Me (Away From You)"

Desperation, Baby! (Dean Winchester/Castiel)

Death took her sweet time parsing through Chuck's book, meaning Lucifer spent longer than he'd like surrounded by his former vessel, his brother, his son, and a man whose obvious longing made him want to vomit. Instead of returning with his prize, Chuck welcoming him back, he must waste his valuable time playing 'nice; with those he can't stand.

Not that it matters. They don't trust him, each member of this ragtag group of survivors watching Lucifer in shifts. Never leaving him alone.

It's Dean's turn now, and he's driving Lucifer up a wall by doing nothing at all save for broadcasting a never-ending supply of feeling. Can he cut the signal without showing his hand, or put Dean's heart to good use?

Coda to 15x19 "Inherit the Earth"

A Healing Touch/New Experiences (Dean Winchester/Castiel, Adam/Serafina)

Maybe if Cas hadn't abandoned him, he wouldn't have agreed to Adam's offer. But with free will finally theirs, Cas made his choice, and Dean his. Now he has to live with the consequences - even if they are awkward. He won't die from it, certainly.

It's only a massage.

But what Dean doesn't know, is that it's more than a massage. It's healing.

It Feels Real Good (Claire Novak/Kaia Nieves, background Dean Winchester/Castiel)

Jody sent her to Yosemite, and she brings her back. For what reason, Claire doesn't know. But it had better be important, otherwise Claire gave the Dark Figure that stole her happiness another chance at escape. Will Jody's house hold a reason important enough for Claire to let go of the heavy burdens she's been carrying since hopping through a rift into another universe?

Coda to 15x12 "Galaxy Brain"

Through the Door (Dean Winchester/Castiel)

Cas tells Sam that Chuck and Amara are here. But how does he know? Sure, he could've felt them land through his grace. But all that time Sam was gone? There was enough there that he could've investigated. They'd need to know where they were anyway, when the time came.

But Cas should've known better. Now wasn't the best moment for a little family reunion, especially when there's so much bad blood it can drown them all. Yet he came, and finally got the audience he always seeked with his father.

Coda to 15x17 "Unity"

Four of Swords (Dean Winchester/Castiel, background Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester)

The Four of Swords, in the present position, means you don't want to interact with the rest of the world. Because of stress, you need to spend some time with yourself - unhealthy always being 'on'. That the healthiest thing to do is to escape.

Dean might crave escape, but it's not something he thinks he can have. Something he deserves, even. After his and Sam's most recent hunt, this cancerous feeling has grown heavy and weighs him down. He cannot escape on his own, as best he tries.

Luckily a guardian 'former angel' angel swoops in at his lowest. Helps pick up the pieces as best he can and lovingly put them back together. But he can only do so much. The rest is up to Dean.

Can Dean take those final steps, say those final words, and finally free himself?

i’d like to teach the world to sing (Dean Winchester/Castiel, Castiel/Others, WIP, 10 out of 15 chapters posted so far)

Mar del Vista, California - 1972

The groovy counterculture that dominated conversation in the past few years still clings to the landscape, floating around like smoke off a burning joint. Changed by the fires of war, Manson, and life into something new. Less trusting, optimistic, and innocent.

Cas is just one of many disillusioned hippies, saddled with a general distrust even before the movement self-imploded. Wary of about everything. Perfect for his line of work, where what's on the surface might not match the truth underneath. It's not an easy life, but he's comfortable with how it goes. Coasting until he hears a case he has no business accepting. For one, it's about a missing teen. And another, it's personal.

Except Jack's disappearance, like every other case he's worked, isn't so cut and dry. Like a rock skipping across a then-placid lake, the ripples stretch far and wide. Those waves slamming at Cas; of cops, federal agents, hippie cultists, and a certain green-eyed detective who's a little too interested in Cas's investigation.

Will Cas find Jack? Or will he drown in the tides.

Checkmate (Dean Winchester/Castiel)

Billie saves Jack from suffering a fatal end from her plan, and knowing Jack was safe gave Cas space to focus on his own troubles. Nearly losing his son again... revelations from Chuck... choices Dean made, were set on, until Sam broke through at the last minute - too close - they all were...

It was too much. Cas needed to digest these roiling experiences away from faces it hurt to look at. Except he stumbles exactly where Chuck wants him. After countless times praying for guidance, Chuck finally decides now is perfect for a long-awaited heart-to-heart.

Coda to 15x17 "Unity"

Slide (Dean Winchester/Castiel, Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester)

This isn't his day. It's Sam's and Eileen's. But while out on the dance floor, Dean realizes something that forces him to act. Act boldly.

It's not his day, but he cannot push back what's been there all along, dam bursting with no hope or need of rebuilding itself. He has to say something to Cas.

Why? Because it's Electric... boogie woogie woogie

(Inspired by the Suptober Day 9 prompt - Electric)

Unwrap Me (Dean Winchester/Castiel)

Dean never thought he would make it this far. Nor would he have as many wonderful things that he has now. A home, friends, family, and most importantly love. With a former angel.

Given how normal his life is now, Dean decides he wants to go all out celebrating Christmas. Parties, feasts, and the perfect presents. He wants to get Cas something that will translate everything that resides in his heart. Dean believes he has the right gift, but decides against leading with it. Instead surprising Cas with it after showing him his Christmas best.

Although, during his entire time planning Cas's present, he never wondered what Cas got him...

Disappointment is temporary, but creativity is eternal 🥂 to more fanworks in 2021!!!

[dirt-cup-draco]

Peter Parker x Reader- Fools

Hi hi hi. Omggg didn’t know you wrote for Peter. If it’s not a bother could you do a fic where reader and peter are in an argument about keeping secrets and the secret you’re both keeping from each other is your powers. And Pete exposes his first bc reader is about to breakup with him and reader just pisses herself bc the IRONY and Pete is just confusion and she then reveals to him that she has telekinesis but she isn’t a superhero like Pete is? Hope you’re having a good day 

Sleep was evading you as the moon arched across the sky slowly. You nearly wished it would quicken it’s pace, or that the light filtering in through your windows would dim so you could at least attempt sleeping. However, you couldn’t blame the moon and it’s gentle light for your restlessness. 

There was only one thing on your mind since you had been woken up from a light sleep hours previous. Only one thing yet the possibilities within that one idea, that one suggestion, were endless. One thought seemed to stumble into the next, snowballing. At this point of the night, you were buried under an avalanche after hours alone and no peace of mind or reassurance. 

Things with Peter had been good. You supposed it was wrong of you to expect things to be easy because of that. Even with your secret hovering over your head, you had felt at peace with Peter. He exuded warmth and acceptance and you had hope that one day you’d be able to admit your mutation. You were telekinetic. You knew plenty of people were different, just like you, you watched the Avengers deal with them when they caused the public trouble. You had no such plans yet the fear that you’d be imprisoned if you admitted what you could do aloud lingered. Despite this, the past four months had been so wonderfully freeing and full of joy that you had gotten lost in that, missing the warning signs. 

Thinking back, nothing had ever seemed wrong. Peter was caring, attentive. He might be clumsy and not so eloquent with words but he meant well and he had charmed you with nothing but a cheeky smile. While you worked, he would bring you lunch. Once you were off, he’d pick you up and you’d go to a movie. He was present and endearing and interested in you. You had never felt particularly interesting before you had met him. Peter’s eyes followed your every move, no matter how simple or silly, with adoration on his face.

You bit your lip, begging the tears to stay at bay. You felt so blind! Rubbing at your eyes, you pulled your sheets up higher around your shoulders. You were going to reach for a tissue yet the creak of a door interrupted you and you froze in place. Eyes locked on the intruder, you watched as they tugged a hoodie over their head. The light from the hallway caught the logo of their hoodie and you relaxed some. 

It was Peter’s hoodie. Your relief was short lived as you couldn’t shake the feeling in your gut that was eating you alive. You wanted to speak but Peter was tiptoeing around, trying not to wake you. It was endearing and you nearly caught yourself forgetting you were crushed. Peter had such an overwhelming impact on you, you were afraid if you let this slide, you would keep getting hurt. You had to look out for yourself first, no matter what Peter made you feel. 

Peter crawled slowly into bed as to not disturb you. He seemed to miss that your eyes were glued to the electronic clock that sat beside you, the red glow casting and eery and taunting light on the wall as another minute passed. Your stomach churned with anxiety as Peter wrapped his arm around your waist. You took a deep breath to force yourself to relax your stiff frame. 

The movement didn’t go unnoticed by your boyfriend. 

“Did I wake you? I’m sorry baby, I was just getting some water, you can go back to sleep,” His excuse was quick and flawless as he kissed the back of your neck affectionately. The cherry on top of the sundae. Sundae of lies is more like it. God, you felt like a teenager having their first bump in the road. Unfortunately, this was more like a mountain in the road. 

You had to say something. Peter’s lie had spilled from his lips without a second thought. If he could lie to you so easily it only solidified your fears into reality. 

“It took you two hours to get a drink of water?” Your voice came out icy and unfamiliar, even to you. 

Peter stiffened up, his arms wrapping around you tighter. A weak laugh stumbled from his mouth. “I think you were dreaming sweetheart,” 

“Don’t,” You warned, wiggling out of his grip so you could stand and face him. You pointed your finger at him in accusation. “Don’t call me sweetheart, or baby, or anything. Don’t say I was dreaming and don’t say that you just got a drink of water,” Fiddling with the knob on your lamp you finally managed to turn it on, expression furious in the orange light. 

Peter paled as you stared down at him. “Y/N, what’s this all about?” He tried to sound casual, unassuming but you heard the nervousness creeping up and turning his silky smooth voice into something pitched and uncontrolled. 

“You know what it’s about,” You seethed, letting your anger stomp out your sadness. “This is the fourth night this week you’ve disappeared in the middle of the night. Is it not enough when I’m over? Do I bore you? What’s so bad about me that you have to leave my bed and fall into another’s?”

Peter’s mouth dropped and you felt some satisfaction in having found him out. You didn’t have proof per se, you hadn’t wanted to look through his phone, but this seemed proof enough. His nervousness, his shock. It was obvious. 

“Hold on a minute!” Peter interrupted, brows knitted to the center of his forehead as he rose up out of bed, hands placed stubbornly crossed over his chest. 

“No! You don’t deserve a minute of my time. You don’t even deserve a second of it!” You pointed again as if it was going to drive in how upset you were, how hurt you were. “I trusted you Pete! I loved you!”

“Y/N listen!” He demanded, muscled legs carrying him to stand before you. You weren’t listening however as you pushed against his chest, pretending you didn’t notice how he didn’t budge an inch. Instead, you opted for pounding your fists against his chest. 

“I’m not listening! Lalalalala,” You said obnoxiously, eyes welling up with tears as your anger started dissipate. Without anything to stoke the fire, you were running out of steam. You might have been acting childishly but you didn’t care. 

You were stopped in your tracks though as Peter grabbed your wrists, halting any more of your assault and you noticed the bruising against his neck. You could just barely make it out in the dim lamp light but it left you more unsettled. He was hardly even trying to hide what he had been up to! Did he want you to end things so badly that he would let himself get caught?

“You’re not thinking straight, let me explain,” Peter pleaded but you shook your head violently, trying to pull your wrists from his grasp but failing miserably. He wasn’t hurting you but he was firm and steadfast. 

“The only thing you’re going to explain to me is why in God’s name you let me fall in love with your stupid face!” A few tears fell and Peter watched you with an aching heart. “Why did you ask me out and why did you let me fall in love when you were just going to find someone else? Or are you just following any pair of tits around hoping you’ll get laid?” 

‘Sweetheart, I-” 

“No! I’m not done and Peter Parker you have already made so many mistakes it would be a grave decision for you to make another by not listening to me.” Peter dropped your wrists, falling heavy onto the bed you two had been happily- or so he thought- sharing hours before. It seemed you wouldn’t calm down until you had said all you had to say, no matter how misguided and hurtful. 

“I might not be perfect, I might not be what you want but I have a heart Pete and I hoped you had one too... Why didn’t you have the decency to just end things? You could have lied, could have said we weren’t working, it was you not me, and we could have buried the damn hatchet. Why would you-” You paused, your eyes widening as something occurred to you. 

“Oh you shallow ass!” You exclaimed suddenly and Peter felt as if he had whiplash. “You found out, didn’t you? What difference does it make? I’m not hurting anyone! I couldn’t even kill a spider on the wall last week and you think that somehow me being telekinetic is a reason for you to cheat on me?” 

“You’re what?” Peter perked up, eyes wide and back straight. 

It was the first full sentence, no matter how short, that he had been able to get out since your little tirade had begun and he was feeling rather surprised. Not upset, of course not, just surprised. Peter thought you told him everything... Not that he could blame you. 

He couldn’t stop the startled laugh that bubbled up. Your eyes were puffy and red from the tears that came and went, your throat dry and voice raw after yelling. And Peter was laughing? It was enough to quiet you as you watched him. 

Peter ran a hand through his hair, shoulders shaking from his gentle laughter. “Oh Y/N... We’ve both got things wrong,” 

“You’re hell right you’ve got things wrong! I mean you- Wait what?” 

“I’m not cheating on you and you’re telekinetic!” He stated, more in observation than any need to defend himself or condemn you. Peter would be the first to admit your accusations did a bit more than stung but he was starting to put things together and he felt terribly foolish about it. 

He had been wondering himself if you had been okay. Sometimes he would walk into the room and you would drop a glass you had in your hand or you’d chuck the remote to the side. He was understanding better now. You hadn’t wanted to tell him about your abilities and so when he arrived you freaked out and you would lose grip on whatever item you had wanted to move, your concentration broke.

Meanwhile, it seemed like you had been wondering about him. He had been hoping and praying you would sleep through the night but he realized it had been wishful thinking. The more time you spent together, the more you would inevitably realize that he was absent far more than a regular 9-5 tech guy. 

The label of Spiderman either scared people away or gave others too many ideas and dating had been uncomfortable. But then he had found you and things had been perfect, he was so happy and he loved you with all of his heart. Part of Peter had hoped that he would never have to tell you out of fear that you would think of him differently or expect him to give it up. If it was you or Spiderman... He wasn’t sure he could give up the latter. 

“But you have to be!” You argued, pointing out his late night disappearances, his shifty behavior, the bruises! Yet, despite your solid proof, your boyfriend laughed again. 

“Spiderman can take a hit Y/N, that doesn’t mean he doesn’t get bruised up along the way,” 

“What does that even have to do with- Oh. Oh! You mean you’re- And I thought that you were- But you’re just saving people?!” You gaped at him like a fish out of water. 

Peter smiled, grabbing your hands and tugging you to stand between his legs. He ran his hand up and down your arm at a comforting pace and you relaxed even as your mind reeled and you tried to put everything together. Of course he wasn’t cheating, of course he was a fucking superhero! 

“Oh Pete, I am so sorry, I was out of line and I love you so much,” You groaned, covering your face with your free hand as shame and embarrassment washed over you. “I can’t believe I thought you were cheating and all of those things I said- Oh my god! You must think I’m crazy...” 

“No,” He laughed and you pouted, bottom lip out and quivering, doe eyed. “Maybe a little,” 

“Pete!” 

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding baby,” He promised. “It’s alright, okay? I understand why you were worried... If I was a normal civilian-” 

“Dear god that was pretentious,” You giggled.

Peter rolled his eyes but smiled. “Okay maybe so, I’m just trying to say if I was in your position-” 

“So I’m a normal civilian, huh?” You pulled your hands from his, searching your nails with an attitude, a haughty expression painted on your face as you tried to keep from laughing at his exasperation. 

“Y/N!” 

“Fine, fine,” You conceded. 

“I understand how you came to that conclusion. I should have been honest with you but I’ve been spiderman for years and the four months I’ve had with you? That’s the longest relationship I’ve been able to have since joining the Avengers... It’s not easy,” 

Peter frowned, eyes dropping to his hands as he twiddled his thumbs and got lost in thought. His forlorn tone tugged at your heartstrings and you wrapped your arms around him, smoothing down his unruly hair as he wrapped his arms around your middle, head nuzzled against your stomach. 

“Did you know that my first relationship ended because they didn’t like that I had telekinesis? We were sixteen and stupid, I thought my gift was pretty cool, I wanted to show him and impress him because I was worried after a couple months of dating he had gotten bored of me... Anyway, he called me a freak and threw shit at me, nearly shit himself when I made one of the items pause midair. I get what it’s like to hide things because it makes relationships difficult. I didn’t tell you because I was scared you’d somehow be like him. But you’re nothing like him you’re-” 

“Spiderman,” He grinned against your stomach and you smiled at the pride in his voice. 

“Exactly,” You kissed the top of his head. “It totally helps that we are both freaks,” 

Peter frowned, “Hey, we aren’t freaks. Fools maybe, for arguing about what turned out to be nothing in the middle of the night, but not freaks.” 

At his reminder you looked at the clock on your bedside table and groaned, squeezing your eyes tight like it would take you both back to when he had come home so you could just fall asleep at a semi-decent hour. The sun would be up sooner rather than later and you weren’t looking forward to waking. 

“If I agree we are fools can we go to bed and take off work tomorrow for some extra cuddling?” 

“As if I’d say no to that,” Peter kissed you soundly, taking your hand and pulling you underneath the covers with him. 

You had nearly drifted off when he whispered against your ear, “Goodnight my fool, I love you,” 

With Peter’s words hanging in the air, you curled up tighter in his arms-the arms reserved specifically for you as he was loyal and perfect- and fell asleep.

[hiddendreamer67]

Gilded Cage- The Witcher

What’s that? Peter Pan Witcher AU, you say??

Summary: Geralt has been watching Yennefer through her window for weeks now. Jaskier flew ahead to scope it out tonight, and now Geralt’s fairy is doing time behind golden bars.

Word Count: 1,623

(In which young Geralt is Peter Pan, the lost boys are all witchers, fairy!Jaskier is his chattering Tinkerbell, and young Yennefer is the mysterious Wendy.)

Feel free to send in more prompts from my bingo card below! Also check out my writing blog @hiddendreamerwriting for more of my work!

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“You are one insane little girl.” Jaskier huffed, his wings twittering irritably on his back as the fairy fluttered about, trying to find a weak spot within his new prison. The golden bird cage seemed perfectly sturdy, unfortunately. “Mentally deranged, in fact. Completely off your rocker!”

“Hmm.” Yennefer gave him a predatory grin, for an eerie moment sounding like Geralt. “Could an insane person do this?” She pushed the side of the cage with her finger, making it sway.

“Yes! Indubitably- indefinitely?” Jaskier cursed his own lack of focus. “You cannot lock me up. Young lady, if you’re even a lady at all, I demand you release me at once!”

Yennefer huffed. “And why on earth would I, pixie, when all you’ve done in chant school yard insults in my direction?”

Jaskier felt his face turning very, very red, and forced himself to try and calm down. He couldn’t let his temper get the best of him, not when this child was holding all the cards.

“Now now, let’s be reasonable.” Jaskier hovered to the middle of the cage, crossing his arms to look stern. It never worked on the lost boys, but perhaps girls were different. “I am a very important fairy, darling. Without me, the very essence of nature would be thrown entirely off balance. Centuries in the making, gone! Poof! I certainly wouldn’t want that to rest on your young conscience, knowing you single-handedly destroyed the world.”

“I don’t have a conscience.” She teased.

“Of course you don’t.” Jaskier muttered. He fluttered up closer to her end of the cage again, glaring. “I’m serious, you know. 100%, total collapse of the earth, entirely in your hands. Ooooor, you open this measly little door, let one harmless fairy go free, and BAM! Savior of the world, right before me. Oh, wouldn’t that be wonderful? You could save everyone, wow, what an honor!”

Yennefer didn’t seem keen to take his deal. Even worse, she didn’t seem to be paying any attention to Jaskier, instead staring out the window.

The music-talent fairy couldn’t make sense of it; here was a child who has successfully caught a fairy, possibly the first to do so, and she wasn’t even interested in the actual fairy? What? Jaskier knew it couldn’t be about him personally, after all he was a sight to behold. A wonderful conversationalist as well (when not trapped in a cage), and though Geralt would never admit it Jaskier knew he made a delightful companion.

“...alright.” Jaskier sighed, knowing his curiosity could get him into trouble. “I’ll bear this burden, address the elephant in the room. What is it you want with me, hmm? I can’t grant wishes, not really my specialty, music’s really my passion but you don’t seem like the lullaby type-”

“You’re with the flying boy.” Yennefer cut him off, once again glancing his way.

...oh.

It wasn’t a question, but Jaskier answered anyway. “Well I’m certainly not with anyone now.” He laughed awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. Strictly speaking, Geralt was meant to be a secret. Of course, so was all of fairy kind, but clearly that ship had sailed.

“Don’t play coy.” Yennefer rolled her eyes. “It’s unbefitting. He’ll come for you, of that I’m certain.”

And- well, she had a point. Jaskier had to hand it to her, it wasn’t a bad plan. Geralt may take pleasure in telling Jaskier off, but Jaskier knew the boy cared for him deep down in that stone heart of his. After all, it was Jaskier who had first found Geralt, the first lost boy, helping him settle on the island before they both discovered more abandoned children to bring to neverland. Jaskier was constantly flitting by his side, ever since Geralt first united the boys under one name: The Witchers.

But, sadly, despite their history, Jaskier knew when Geralt came it wouldn’t be for him.

“And if he doesn’t?” Jaskier asked bitterly. “Plan on keeping me behind golden bars until I starve to death? I won’t make it easy on you, mind you, my death will be slow and painful and vocal, I assure you.”

Yennefer considered this for a moment. “I suppose I’ll just have to transfer you to a jar, then. Put you out of your misery when the air runs out.”

Despite the teasing glint in her eye, her blatant comment made Jaskier turn furious. His chittering rose to such a high pitch that to Yennefer’s ears his swearing sounded more like tinkling bells. The young girl laughed, amused at his plight.

In all the commotion, a light breeze at the window went unnoticed, a figure with glowing eyes floating in to stand on the windowsill. He cleared his throat, immediately pulling all attention to himself. The young boy was dressed in dark rags, white hair tugged out of his face.

Yennefer let out a gasp in awe, appearing almost reverent. “You’re here.”

“You took my fairy.” Geralt jutted his chin towards the cage, and Jaskier ignored the pleased warmth that came with that title.

“True.” Yennefer admitted. “But I assure you, your firefly is unharmed.”

“Hmm.” Geralt’s face betrayed no emotion as Jaskier’s voice went too high to hear again.

“Mouthy, isn’t he?” Yennefer tilted her head, glancing at the fairy. “Don’t know how you haven’t gone deaf.”

Geralt’s lip twitched, clearly torn on how to respond. “...I’ve no idea.”

“Geralt!”

Geralt sighed at Jaskier’s indignant response. “Release him.”

The girl stood up, crossing her arms and coming closer to Geralt. “No manners? Perhaps think you can give me orders because I’m a little girl?”

Geralt wisely said nothing.

“Or perhaps you think it’s alright to come peer into my window when I’m sleeping.” Yennefer squinted at him with a knowing eye. “How long have you been watching me sleep, witcher?”

“Mmm.” Geralt looked displeased with where this was going.

“Hope you enjoyed the view.” Yennefer moved her hands to her hips. “But I think it’s only fair I get some repayment, I know fathers who have beat boys for doing less to their daughters. Not that mine would give a damn, of course, but a lady deserves her secrets.”

“I hardly think it’s fair recompensation, my life for his adolescent tendencies!” Jaskier called out, completely neglecting all the times Geralt had to save him after Jaskier’s own wandering eyes got them in trouble.

Geralt growled in his direction, clearly embarrassed.

“I won’t keep your fairy, boy, not to worry.” Yennefer patted Geralt’s cheek, making the lost boy flinch away from the unexpected contact. It had been years since someone had touched him so, even in jest. “I only ask for one favor.”

“What’s the favor?” Geralt asked.

“Teach me to fly.” Yennefer glanced out the window. “So I can escape this life.”

Jaskier and Geralt shared a look, glancing around the elegant nursery. They had met plenty of abandoned or neglected children on the streets, but in such a lavish home?

“You’d miss this life.” Geralt murmured.

“Don’t speak for me as if you know a thing about my life.” Yennefer snapped. “My choices are my own. I won’t stay where I’m not wanted, no matter the golden trim. My parents play a charade I want no part of and they’ve made it clear my less vocal siblings are preferred. I will start anew on my own terms.”

“Or you’ll die on the streets.” Jaskier piped up. “Starving, freezing, perhaps abandoned on a bench. Only so much pixie dust to go around, really, before you end up in the middle of nowhere. At least here it’s safe with a luxury pillow beneath your head.”

“Jaskier.” Geralt issued in a warning tone.

Yennefer ignored the musician’s squabblings, narrowing in on one fact in particular. “Pixie dust?” She glanced between them. “Is that the secret to how you fly?”

Geralt let out a long sigh. “No. And yes. It’s … complicated.”

“Then perhaps you should un-complicate it.” Yennefer challenged. “Or I’ll simply push you off and learn by observation.”

Geralt raised an eyebrow in a gesture that clearly stated ‘I’d like to see you try.’ Yennefer stared him down, the two clearly caught in a silent match for dominance.

“Let Jaskier out.” Geralt was the one to break their silence. “Only then.”

“Say please.” Yennefer challenged.

Geralt stayed quiet.

“Oh Geralt, come on!” Jaskier threw his arms out. “It’s one word, we’re so close- give the crazy child what she wants?”

Geralt’s jaw tensed, his teeth gritted. “...please.”

Yennefer smirked in triumph, sauntering over to the cage. “And I thought manners killed witchers. Perhaps you’re not all uncivilized urchins.”

The moment Jaskier was free he zoomed over to Geralt’s side, tugging at the boy’s hair. “Alright, we did it, time to go!”

Geralt looked at him as though he’d gone mad. “Jaskier, she let you go. I need to help her.”

“She also kidnapped me.” Jaskier hissed, clearly still peeved to be in the nursery at all.

“And you both spied on me first.” Yennefer frowned. “We can play the blame game all night.”

“No need.” Geralt brushed Jaskier to the side, easily stepping towards Yennefer. “I’ll teach you to fly.”

Jaskier felt his heart shattering, watching Geralt so casually pass him by. This was his big fear, the reason he had flown ahead to try and lock the nursery window. Geralt had fallen head over heels for Yennefer the past few nights and that was before she was even awake. Now Geralt continued to take her side, even when she proved herself to be a dangerous fairy-napper.

The music fairy huffed, sliding down to sulk atop the bookshelf. With his luck, Geralt would want to do something reckless like invite the girl back to neverland.

[cherryrogers]

bittersweet {8}

pairing: boxer!bucky x rogers!reader

warnings: angst, mentions of death, very mild violence. sh*t is about to hit the fan guys.

synopsis: The world of boxing wasn’t something you knew much about, but after a certain boxer with blue eyes and an irresistible charm wove his way into your heart, you soon learned that it went far deeper than red gloves and gold medals. You thought that the boxer happening to be your brother’s best friend was bad enough, but unfortunately for everyone, the worst had yet to come.

a/n: hello, this fic isn’t dead !! i’ve shortened this part down; i was going to leave y’all on a cliffhanger but,,, since this chapter is like a million years overdue, i’ve been nice lmao. this part is also very steve heavy; bucky will have his time to shine soon guys !! 2/3 more chapters to go, hope you enjoy :)

Series Masterlist

“Oh, here comes your boyfriend.”

“Please don’t call him my boyfriend, Nat.”

Peter Quill was striding towards you after miraculously spotting you across the campus. With a bounce in his step, he shot you a shit-eating smile. You knew that this was coming, but that didn’t mean you were looking forward to it.

“Hey, girlfriend,” The boy slung an arm over your shoulder, glancing between you and Natasha. “(Y/N) and I are dating now, you know. She’s kinda always had a thing for me—”

The redhead narrowed her eyes at him, cutting him off. “I already know it’s just a cover up, Quill. Stop acting like an idiot.”

His smug expression fell along with the arm circling your shoulders. “Well, what’s the point of being your fake boyfriend if I don’t even get to act like it around other people?”

“The point is so that my brother doesn’t start asking questions.”

“So... you’re seeing someone else? I’m hurt, truly.”

“Peter—”

“Can’t you at least tell me who I’m covering for?” The boy whined. “What am I even getting out of this if you’re not properly playing the girlfriend part?”

You bit the inside of your cheek; you did feel a little bad, dragging him into a situation that he’d never asked to be in. There was no way you were letting him, well, get anywhere near you, even if you did end up seeing him in your brother’s presence. He was doing you a big favour though, you owed him something for that.

A knowing smile tugged at the corner of your lips as you pulled out your phone, flicking your eyes back up to Peter’s. “I can’t tell you who you’re covering for, but I can give you something else. You remember Mora, right?”

His eyes widened. “The hot girl from that frat party a few weeks back? Majors in astronomy?”

“That’s her,” You confirmed. “If you agree to stop asking questions and play the fake boyfriend part normally, I’ll give you her number right now.”

Outside of parties, you didn’t really see Mora that much. She was the whole package, though — smart, gorgeous, confident; anybody would be lucky to date her. You weren’t sure if Peter was necessarily her type, but he could be a nice enough guy at times. Perhaps they’d actually end up hitting it off.

It didn’t take long for the boy to shrug, muttering a ‘sounds good to me’ as he pulled his own phone from his pocket and punched in Mora’s number.

Natasha gave you a gentle nudge while Peter was distracted, nodding towards a car that’d just pulled up on the sidewalk not far from you. Your eyes widened at the sight of Bucky waiting for you, forgetting up until that moment that he picked you up from class on Monday mornings. Maybe you wouldn’t have forgotten if you’d actually heard from him after he left to see Steve the night before. You’d barely gotten a wink of sleep, not hearing from Bucky, not knowing if your brother was alright. Well, of course he wasn’t, but even a sugarcoated text from Bucky telling you he was ‘fine’ would’ve at least eased your anxiety a little.

“I’ve gotta go,” You shot Natasha a smile before turning your gaze to Peter, pointing a warning finger at him. “Don’t mess it up with Mora; use her number wisely. Don’t over-text, but don’t give half assed responses either—”

“I know, I know,” The boy cut you off. “Jeez, what do you take me for? An idiot?”

“Yes.” Natasha and you replied simultaneously, sharing a knowing grin while you backed away from your two friends before Peter could start an argument.

A pit formed in your stomach as you approached the car, feeling Bucky’s gaze on you as you climbed into the seat next to him. You didn’t like feeling that way around him, uncomfortably nervous. You’d trusted him when he said that everything was going to turn out okay, so why were you still so unsure that it would be?

Letting out a breath, you fiddled with your hands in your lap. “I didn’t think you were picking me up today.”

The boxer’s brows furrowed. “Why wouldn’t I? I always pick you up on Mondays.”

“Well, I didn’t hear from you last night, or this morning. I wasn’t sure that everything went okay with Steve...” You trailed off anxiously, not knowing what else to say.

Bucky bit his lip, suddenly feeling a wave of guilt wash over him. A lot of things had came to light when he talked with Steve. Why he was in so much trouble, his own involvement with the ring... it hadn’t even occurred to him to let you know your brother was alright once he’d left, since his mind was wizzing with so much new information that his first instinct when he got home was to sleep it off and think it through in the morning. He should’ve known you’d be worried sick, however. The whole situation would worry anybody sick, and it was his responsibility to make sure you felt as at ease as you possibly could, given the circumstances.

“No, no, it was fine,” He assured you. Of course, everything was not fine, but that wasn’t something you needed to hear from him. Since he’d convinced Steve to finally let you in on the ordeal, he figured it was better that you heard the whole story from him. “I should’ve called you though, I’m sorry. Steve... he’s going to tell you everything.”

Your eyes widened. “He is?”

“He thinks you deserve to know, which you do,” Bucky nodded, patting your hand. “I’m warning you, though, it might be a lot to take in. Steve’s kept a lot of stuff to himself to protect you, it’s alright if it’s hard for you to understand...”

“I’ll be fine,” You quickly cut him off. You didn’t quite believe you own words, but what other choice did you have? Whatever situation your brother was in, you could assume that it wasn’t going to be an easy one to get out of. “This will all be over soon though, right? The secrets, the trying to protect me, the staying out of danger... tell me it’ll all be fine, Bucky?”

To that, Bucky didn’t have a certain answer. He’d said it to you before, though — guys like Brock Rumlow never win. The boxer liked to believe he’d get what was coming to him eventually, preferably soon. At this point, however, he wasn’t so sure how possible that was.

But for you, he’d do what he could.

He brought your hand to his mouth, pressing a kiss reassuringly to the back of it. “It’ll all be alright, I promise.”

You were almost eager to challenge his words, to tell him that he shouldn’t make promises that can’t be kept, but you didn’t. You trusted Bucky, wholeheartedly. It was everyone else that you’d didn’t trust; Brock, his boxing gym, even Steve who’d managed to keep some massive secret from you for Lord knows how long. But Bucky... you believed he was the only one who wasn’t keeping something from you. He was the one who’d told you about Brock, about how Steve was in danger. Without him trusting you enough to tell you about everything, you’d probably be none the wiser.

Maybe it’d be more foolish to not trust him.

After picking you up, Bucky took you to get coffee from a small place only five minutes away from campus. While you sat together in a cozy booth in the corner of the cafe, the boxer was noticeably doing his best to try and ease your worries about your brother. He told you about the latest drama at the gym, which involved a new guy named Thor who was twice the size of every boxer there and seemingly had the most amazing blond locks that Bucky had ever seen — better than Steve’s, even. He did have one flaw, however; someone at the gym, after a good hour of social media stalking, found that Thor was having long distance relationship troubles with a ‘way out of his league’ girl at a college in Indiana.

You weren’t sure there was as much drama in all your years of high school compared to the scandalous affairs of boxers in Brooklyn. It took your mind off your brother for the time being, anyway.

An hour later, Bucky had dropped you back at your apartment. He offered to stay and keep you company, but you assured him that you’d be alright on your own. You assumed he was concerned that you were going to work yourself up over your brother all over again like the night you’d argued with him, and he had every reason to think that, because that’s exactly what you did around ten minutes after you’d been left alone at home.

Every passing moment without any word from him only made you more antsy. If you ever argued Steve, which was rare, it was usually resolved within a couple of hours. It’d been almost a whole day now, and the feeling of not knowing where you stood with him was slowly eating at you.

Before you knew it, you had impulsively hopped on a bus to the boxing gym.

Was Steve going to kill you for going there? Most likely. If he miraculously didn’t, would Bucky kill you once he’d found out you’d gone there? Definitely. But you were done waiting, done with being left in the dark for your own ‘protection’.

As you stepped off the bus, you couldn’t help but glance cautiously up and down the street, making sure Brock Rumlow wasn’t hiding somewhere, waiting to get inside your head again. Thankfully, you were able to get to the entrance of the gym without an issue, but that didn’t ease any your nerves about seeing Steve.

From the changing room on the left side of the corridor once you’d shut the door behind you, a familiar figure in his boxing gear came strolling out, and a wide smile set on his lips upon seeing you. God, not again.

“Hey, girlfriend,” Peter nudged your shoulder with his wrapped fist. “Just can’t get enough of me?”

“I’ve had more than enough of you today, Peter, which is why I’m not here to see you,” You narrowed your eyes playfully at him. “Do you know where Steve is?”

“Uh...”

On cue, a broad-shouldered blond pushed through the doors of the main gym, not exactly being as happy to see you as Peter was once he noticed your presence.

There was a scowl on his lips as he stalked over, and you could feel Peter tensing up from beside you. It’s not like the guy wasn’t almost the same size as your brother, but nobody liked being around Steve when he was angry. You could practically feel the holes he was burning into your skull with the way he was glaring at you.

He stopped just in front of you, completely disregarding the awkward smile Peter tried to greet him with. “What the hell are you doing here? You know you can’t be here, even if it’s to see your... boyfriend.”

“I’m here to talk to you, you jerk,” You stood your ground, crossing your arms over your chest. “It’s been a day, what the hell have you been doing?”

“I’m just... gonna go...” Peter laughed nervously, walking backwards slowly towards the main gym doors before spinning around and getting out of the situation as quick as possible.

Steve tried to stare you down, to get you to drop your guard and go home so that he could talk to you some other time, not in the one place you were meant to be staying clear of. When you refused to drop his gaze, he sighed heavily. Without another word, he nodded down the corridor and began pacing, motioning for you to follow him. He lead you down a few short corridors before entering an empty staff room, a small area with two leather couches facing opposite each other and divided by a wooden coffee table. There was a miniature kitchen area with a coffee machine and some cupboards, likely filled with old packets of cookies that’d expired long ago.

When he started training at the gym, his manager Tony offered him the job of cleaning the place some nights after hearing that he was strapped for cash. It was odd to you then; he was able to help pay your college tuition and get you your own apartment, but a few months later he was struggling to buy groceries? Where the initial money came from, you weren’t sure. Well, not yet.

Tentatively, you sat down on one of the couches, silently waiting for Steve to calm down and talk to you properly without that stupid crease between his brows and frown on his face. Back when he was in middle school and puberty hadn’t yet hit him like a truck, your mother was often called into school to collect your beaten and bruised brother after continuous incidents with bullies. He’d have on the same annoyed expression as he wore now, and your mother had to explain to him that being stubborn wasn’t the only option; he could get out of dangerous situations if he wanted to and that fighting back wasn’t always the answer. Ironically, he was too stubborn to ever listen to her advice.

When Steve finally let out a breath and sat down on the couch opposite you, you wondered if he’d pictured your mom telling him to wipe the sour look off his face. To talk things out and let go of his pride, because being too iron-willed never ended well. If Steve was really going to sit down and tell you everything, the dark parts, mistakes and all, you were sure she’d be proud of him.

“Look, I’m sorry for the way I acted last night, and just now.” He spoke, his tone a lot calmer than before which provided you with some relief.

You sighed, a small smile tugging at your lips. “I know you think I’m naive; you say that you don’t, but I’m your younger sister, of course you’re gonna think I don’t understand things the way that you do. But that doesn’t meant you can just shut me out, Steve.”

“I mean this when I say it, kid. I don’t think you’re naive; there’s just... there’s a lot of things you don’t know about the past few years...”

“You can tell me, all of it,” You assured him. “At the end of the day, I know you’re a good person. There’s not a lot of things you could say that’d make me not think that.”

The blond’s eyes stayed trained on the surface of the coffee table, almost unable to comprehend that he was actually going to do this — tell you what he’d been on the run from for so long, what he’d done and agreed to to give you the best chance of a good life after your mom passed. With a hesitant swallow, Steve finally met your eyes, and he began to explain everything.

Starting with his feelings after the death of your mother, he told you how torn up he was, like there was an anchor tied to his heart and pulling at it twenty-four-seven, barely giving him a moment of peace. Art as a way of coping wasn’t working for him anymore, his pain was too much of a weight for the delicacy of pencils and paintbrushes. It was then that he joined the boxing gym, which was where he met Bucky. He’d told Bucky about needing a release, needing something to punch the life out of because he couldn’t bare beating himself up anymore, and the brunet was able to help him help himself.

Bucky had also informed him of the gym across town. Vaguely, he’d explained to Steve that boxers there made unholy amounts of money for matches, but a lot more brutally and not at all legally. The blond didn’t listen to that part, however. Money, he needed money. At that time, you were set to graduate high school in a matter of months, and while you acted like it didn’t bother you, you were sure that getting to college by the fall wasn’t on the cards. After everything falling apart once your mom passed, Steve wasn’t going to let things get worse for you. He was your older brother, and you were only seventeen — it was his responsibility to take care of you. He was getting you to college and giving you the independence you needed after leaving high school, that was all he knew.

And that’s when he took a trip across town and met Brock Rumlow, and that’s when Alexander Pierce started having him properly trained and doing his dirty work.

As far as he knew, Steve was fighting men under other managements every other week for a large sum of cash split between him and the gym if he won. There was a feeling in his gut that there was more to the story, but he actively tried to ignore it, even while every match resulted in almost broken bones and being close to unconsciousness by the end of it. In a couple of months, he’d made more money than he’d ever gotten in pocket money as a kid. When would he ever have the opportunity to make cash like that again?

It wasn’t until a match that took place on a cold night in late December that he realised what he was involved in; what kind of people he was making money for. The match that night was horrific, he’d barely gotten a punch in against the burly, heavily tattooed man that’d came from Florida to fight. Bloody and battered, Steve had went looking for Rumlow after the match had ended, only wanting to ask if he could head home for the night. It took him five minutes to finally find the man in the parking lot behind the building, gripping a girl no older than twenty on her upper arm, her wrists tied behind her back with a thick rope. She was shoved in the back of a large black van with blacked out windows, and before Steve could even reach Rumlow, the van was gone along with the girl.

It was then he knew; he lost the match, and there was a price to pay for that. That price happened to be that girl, her freedom. No amount of money was worth hurting innocent people like that. The fighting wasn’t just about cash. It was about power, and greed, and reputation.

“Steve, you didn’t have to do that. You didn’t have to any of that for me. We could’ve worked things out together...”

“Maybe, but I wasn’t in a good headspace then, (Y/N). I thought ‘cause I was doing it to help you that what I was doing was for the best. I was the naive one.”

So, he told Rumlow he quit, and he was going to get the entire organisation shut down. The man only laughed in his face at that. Police could come in and out of the gym as much as they wanted, but they’d never find anything. That was the worst part; even if Steve left, there were people that didn’t get that option, that were trapped in the hands of the likes of Pierce to only be traded off for someone else to control.

The guilt would follow Steve like a shadow, but what use would it be to stay? Getting out of there looked like his only choice, and he was sure everyone that was part of the ring would get what was coming to them one day. He could only pray they did.

Then, the dreaded deal was made. Of course, they couldn’t just let Steve leave on his own accord. Rumlow wanted a match and he wanted a prize when he won, as he’d put it. Granted, Steve thought there was nothing he could give him that he didn’t already have, but accepted the deal anyway. It got Pierce and him off his back for the time being, and again, what could Rumlow possibly want that only Steve could provide him? The match seemed pretty pointless in his opinion.

The landslide of a story Steve was telling you already had your heart in your stomach. All you could do was sit stiffly and silently and hope that there was a happy ending to it all. It seemed as he explained the most recent addition to the whole ordeal, however, that the story wasn’t actually over.

Because then, he told you about the prize Rumlow wanted. You. If your brother lost, you were to become his property, like an object. That’s when you couldn’t stay quiet anymore.

“So they’ll just take me? I’ll have no choice other than to let them... do what they want with me?” Your bottom lip quivered as your hands gripped the leather of the couch next to your legs.

“Kid, you’re not going anwhere,” Steve said firmly.

“But—”

“No, listen to me,” He pressed, holding your glossy-eyed gaze. “You’re gonna walk away from all of this. They’ll have to kill me before they get to you—”

“Don’t even say that, Steve,” You jumped up from your seat, still unable to fully take in the gravity of the situation. How? How had all of this been going on in your brother’s life and you had no idea? You ran a shaky hand through your hair. “When? When’s the match?”

His voice was barely above a whisper. “Friday.”

“Oh my— shit,” You could barely believe what you were hearing. Four days. In four days you could possibly never see Steve again, or Natasha, or Bucky. You could be getting put in the back of a van, being taken to who knows where and never stepping foot in New York again. Shit. “Does anyone else know about... all of this?”

“Bucky, I told him the other night,” Steve responded, but you already knew that. Well, you knew he knew about the fighting ring, but not the fact that you were being used as a damn prize. “But I think he might be able to help us. I’m not sure how yet, but he used to be apart of the ring too...”

The remainder of Steve’s words didn’t register as you felt your heart clench. It didn’t feel real, none of it did.

Bucky, your Bucky, worked for Brock Rumlow? He was part of what Steve was desperately trying to run from, and he never told you? He never told you. Didn’t he trust you enough?

“You still with me, kid?”

Your brother’s voice startled you, but you nodded weakly, pushing Bucky out of your mind momentarily. “Isn’t there any way you can pull out of the deal? If— if you don’t wanna fight him, he can’t make you, right?”

A shaky sigh left Steve’s lips. “There’s something else I need to tell you. You should sit down, (Y/N).”

You did so reluctantly, wishing you could just suddenly wake up and learn that the last fifteen minutes had all been a dream. A horrible dream.

“If I don’t fight on Friday, or if I don’t follow their rules for the match, they’re gonna have me put behind bars for life.” The blond harshly bit down on the inside of his cheek, trying to keep his composure.

You shook your head in disbelief, brows crinkled. “But how? You haven’t done anything, they’re the ones breaking the law. They’re the ones with blood on their hands, Steve.”

“They’re not the only ones with blood on their hands,” He responded, eyes set hardly on the coffee table again. “For two years, the police have been looking for a missing man. John Preston; he was twenty one, had no immediate family alive, boxed at a gym in New Jersey. I saw it on the news when he first went missing, and I saw his picture. I knew him, and it took me a minute, but then I realised that I knew him because I’d fought him. He was one of the last guys I fought before I left the gym, and... it was an ugly match. It ended with him being knocked unconscious, and I wasn’t far off collapsing either. I never knew what happened to him until I ran into Rumlow outside of our gym; he told me John was dead. Killed the night after I’d knocked him out in the ring.”

“But that wasn’t you—”

“He needed to go to the hospital,” Steve interrupted, your argument being pointless. “But nobody would take him. There was too much of a risk that the police would get involved. So... they just killed him. Rumlow didn’t tell me what they did with his body, but he hasn’t been close to being found. The cops have probably deemed it a cold case by now, but... Pierce, the sick bastard, he likes to keep a video of all the fights. As proof of who won and lost, and probably for his own sick entertainment.”

You spoke up timidly; it was clear at this point what he was implying. “There’s a video of you knocking John unconscious, isn’t there? And they could use it to... to frame you for his murder.”

Whatever response Steve gave you, you didn’t at all catch it, your mind completely scrambled from what you’d just heard. You’d like to believe that there was some hope for the situation, that Steve would simply be able to win the match on Friday and finally cut ties with the ring and everything involved. But you doubted the odds would be in his favour, especially with Brock Rumlow controlling every aspect of the deal.

You needed to speak to Bucky. Perhaps he knew how to make things right. He said everything would be okay, and you wanted badly to believe him. Then again, what if he was in as much trouble as you and Steve were? Who knew what connection he still had with Pierce, what deal he had to agree to to get out of there.

And to think, a matter of months ago, you thought that Steve finding out about your relationship with Bucky was going to be your biggest problem. You’d truly been living in your own bubble then, utterly unaware of the darkness behind the most important people in your life.

From being distracted by an attractive boxer and being unwilling to let him go so easily, you’d somehow ended up needing a way to stop your brother being framed for murder and yourself being sold into the hands of criminals.

Yet amid the anxiety and the fear, there was still a part of you that hoped Bucky would know what to do. He swore to you that everything would be alright, that Rumlow wouldn’t win.

All you could do was trust that he didn’t make empty promises.

* * *

@kimvmarvel @printedpeterparker @buckyandsebastian @ilovesupersoldiers @asgcrds @bxrnsfeyson @peterparkerbabyyy @broco8 @hotheadbarnes @stormi-ames @founding-fuck-bois @fizzahocleirigh

[loopsforlupin]

My Brother’s Brother is Now Ours

-James was shocked when Regulus approached him in the library, his typical sour expression firmly locked into place. Peter tensed beside him, but James kept his body language relaxed, and continued to work on his essay. He wasn’t afraid of Reg, and he refused to let the younger boy think he was. Regulus stopped about two feet from James and Peter, and seemed to be bracing himself for a verbal assault from the duo for having approached them. When no such attack came he stood up straight and held his head high. 

- “Potter, Pettigrew.” Regulus made eye contact with both, waiting until he received an acknowledging nod in return to their name. “I was wondering if I could speak to you alone Potter.” James finally stopped writing, and sat straight in his chair. He looked closely at the younger boy, this was Sirius’s brother, his brother’s brother. The boy looked gaunt, haunted even. His flat grey eyes ringed with heavy bags, were maintaining strong eye contact, but James could see the fear, the doubt, the acceptance that James was going to tell him to go away and never speak to him again. Instead, James set down his quill, told Peter to watch his stuff, and then motioned for Regulus to lead the way. 

- The two boys moved to a quiet corner of the library, and when Regulus stood instead of sitting, James rolled his eyes and flopped down on the seat, kicking one closer to Regulus when the stubborn idiot seemed to think that standing was still a good idea. “Oh for Merlin’s beard! Sit Down Reg! Salazar you are a stubborn arse!” Regulus sneered at the bespectacled older boy, but did take the seat. “You’re not one to talk Potter!” 

- James snorted, but didn’t deny the accusation. He was an ass sometimes, but he at least admitted it. The Black brother’s were asses if James ever saw one. With a casual looking flick of his wand he constructed a privacy shield, and a small silencing bubble around them. “So, baby snake, what’s up with this unholy meeting of ours?” Regulus looked angry at the nickname but smirked at the name James used for their spontaneous meeting. “Unholy indeed.” Regulus suddenly looked nervous and a little ashamed. “How is he?” 

-James sat up straighter, his relaxed, careless demeanor suddenly changing into that of the over protective brother he really was. “You mean after your charming parents beat him within an inch of his life? After he forced his battered and bloody body to apparate to the only safe space he had? Or do you mean after he was patched up by MY mother, and he apologized to her for dripping his blood onto her floors? You’d have to be more specific Reg!” James voice never rose in level, but as he spoke the very temperature of the space around them became colder, a clear indication of how furious James Fleamont Potter really was. 

- Regulus Black said nothing in his defense. But he also kept his head held up high. His grey eyes, so similar to Sirius’s but lacking that comforting warmth, that friendliness that made James befriend the fellow dark haired boy in the first place. “ I will not apologize for the actions of others. I have never raised my wand to my own brother. I have never harmed him.” James snorted, relaxing back into his seat, slouching down his arms crossed across his chest, his wand twirling between his long fingers. 

- “ Haven’t you? I reckon you may not have hexed, jinxed or cursed Sirius, but you’ve done your own damage to my brother. You know how worthless he feels? How many times after our little encounters, I have to pull him into a hug because all he wants is for his little brother to acknowledge him without anger or hatred marring it? How often he cries when our mother shows him the barest hint of kindness? Or when I put an arm around his shoulder to show him he’s safe and he flinches because no one ever touched him with love? Do you have any clue how often he stepped in between you and them when their anger turned to you, how often he placed himself in harms way just to keep you safe.” 

-Regulus flinched back with every accusation. His eyes widening and dulling in shame. Those cursed eyes, so much like Sirius’s but so very different at the same time, were wounded, but after James was done with his little speech, those same eyes lit up with fire. James was glad to see that, maybe Reg was finally seeing what James was getting at. 

- “I know. I Know! DAMMIT, I KNOW OKAY!! I KNOW I DON’T DESERVE A BROTHER LIKE HIM! I’M A HORRIBLE BROTHER, I DON’T KNOW HOW TO PROTECT HIM, BECAUSE HE ALWAYS PROTECTED ME. I’VE ONLY EVER CAUSED HIM PAIN, AND IT KILLS ME! HE’S DONE EVERYTHING TO MAKE SURE I DON’T END UP LIKE HIM.” 

-James cocked an eyebrow. “What do you mean? “End up like him”” Regulus stopped his chest heaving, but his head snapped up in shock. “Nothing. I mean nothing.” James spun his wand up and aimed it at Regulus, as he stood slowly from his chair, and stalked forward until the wand dug in Regulus’s neck. “What did you mean by that?” James voice, while not high pitched, was definitely not a gravely growl like what had just come out of his throat. Regulus seemed realize that James wasn’t in a mood for secrets. 

- “Sirius used to pull their anger away from me. I begged him to stop, to let me take their punishments for me so that he wouldn’t be so hurt and sore all the time. He told me no. Told me that his job as an older brother was to protect me, and that one day he wasn’t going to be around to do it so I had to focus on pleasing them, even if I didn’t agree with them. He used to train me, how to act, how to present myself so that no one ever suspected of me as being anything less than a perfect son. He always acted as if he had to make sure I was trained, because he knew something I didn’t.” Regulus was crying as he spoke, but here he had to stop and let out a choked back sob. 

- “I found out a year ago by accident. They’re planning on murdering him. They were waiting for me to reach 17 before they did it. They realized that he was never going to be an heir and were plotting for him to have an accident. The night he came to you, mother lost her temper, she said she couldn’t wait anymore and she was going to end him then and there, claim that he snapped and came after her. I managed to sneak away and warn him enough that he at least had his wand, but when he escaped, mother banished him. Wiped him from the family tapestry. Sirius isn’t a Black any longer, he’s been denounced.” 

-James gaped at the younger- only Black heir. “She denounced him? Her eldest son? Are you sure she denounced him? Or did she just wipe him from the tapestry?” Regulus swallowed hard. “ She stated the next day that’s she was going to write to grandfather to have him denounced. I know she removed him from the tapestry, I saw it when I went in the room. His name and face were blasted off just like Andy’s.”

-James let a string of curses fly from his lips. How dare that vile hag try and do that to his brother. She should be the one denounced, shamed and abandoned by the Black family. All of them should be. Except for Sirius, maybe Andromeda too. She had run off with that muggle born wizard, against the family’s wishes.  Sirius’s uncle was a decent bloke too, right damn funny. He could stay. If James ever saw the hag that had birthed his brother not even his father’s warning would prevent him from hexing her with the most vile spell he could find. Maybe he could consult Moony, he knew a lot of good archaic spells. Yes Moony knew lots of good ways to punish people. And he adored Sirius, in more ways then one if James was reading those glances right.

-Regulus Arcturus Black was impressed. For a Lion, James Potter knew a lot of words that would have made even his mother impressed. Where did he learn such vile things? When the boy finally tapered off into dark mutterings about hexes and punishing “disgusting vile gags that should be thrown into the pits of Tartarus and impaled on rusty Muggle spikes” Regulus attempted to move the wand that was still digging into his throat.

- When James allowed the movement, and continued to glare and mutter about his mother, Regulus relaxed. James Potter was a good man. He was a man who saw what his family was, and despite that, had pulled the heir of a dark dark family into his circle of friends, declared them to be brothers, and just accepted that Sirius wasn’t exactly normal. He loved Sirius, completely, unabashed by the fact that they were both males, and such close friendships weren’t typical. James didn’t care. He could be seen hugging, kissing, and laying on all his friends. He truly didn’t care. As long as his friends didn’t’terribly mind he showed his affection and love as easy as breathing.

- If Regulus had to share his brother with anyone, he was glad it was James Potter. The arragont little toe rag. He was probably the only one capable of showing Sirius what it meant to be loved. Too damn stubborn to let his older brother get away with anything else. Speaking of James, the boy was finally settling down. His mutterings fewer and farther apart.

-“ Regulus?” James’s voice was quiet, but calm. Regulus looked at the boy in acknowledgement of his speaking. “They haven’t done anything to you right? Since Sirius left I mean.” Regulus wasn’t shook often, but he couldn’t stop the flush of stunned amazement on his face. Why did Potter care what they did to him? He wasn’t one of Potter’s brothers. Just a snake, a slimy little snake.

- James was watching the other boy closely. Up close, Regulus looked awful. Granted he was a Black, so pale and haunt was a semi-normal look. However, the way he was holding himself made it seem like he was hiding a pain. Especially in the torso area. And the light sheen of perspiration that was beading along his forehead said James was right to question.

- “Show me now.” Regulus snapped his eyes up to older man, but quickly shook his head. “They’ve done nothing Potter. I’m perfectly fine.” James snorted, and then using those blasted lightning fast chaser reflexes, he had backed regulus up against a wall, and had his uniform shirt lifted up to examine his torso.

-Regulus was trying to figure out how he had gotten here. Backed up against a wall, in the secluded corner of the Hogwarts’ library, with Gryffindor James Fucking Potter, molesting him in an effort to determine if Regulus was injured. And he silently cursed the taller boy, as he struggled to get his hands out of James one sterched out above his head. What was the boy, part Mountain Troll, Salazar how was he so strong? Or was Regulus really that weak? His life was awful sometimes. Thankfully Regulus used regular glamours, so none of the bruises and burns were visible to James’ probing. If only it would hide the blush that had burned across his face. Damn his body. Now was not the time, as he realized that James had placed a leg between Regulus’s own to help keep the boy pinned for his examination. Really,really not the time then.

- That relief was short lived however, as with a small twitch of his wand, James had torn the glamours off. Revealing all the bruises, the burns, the small red scars from healed injuries. James reached out to touch the bruises, which littered along his ribs. His touch firm, but not harsh, he prodded and poked the muscles and bones underneath the skin.

- “Nice glamours. Sirius liked to use them too. I know all his lovely tricks to hide bruises and injuries. Well you’ve got at least three broken ribs. And some nice infected cuts.” As he spoke, his hand started to rub against Regulus’s stomach. Small gentle circles, which had very interesting effects of Regulus’s body. On one hand it relaxed him, his body losing some of that tension that had him stiff as a board, but it also made his dick twitch with interest. Damn his anatomy!

- Apparently, Peter, has decided that James and Regulus going off alone together for a longish period of time meant trouble, because he had run off to find Remus, who had been with Sirius, and all three had run to the aid of their friend. And as the three other boys rounded the corner and into the little nook where James and Regulus were, they were greeted with an interesting sight. James was manhandling a blushing and disheveled looking Regulus, who had a battered and bruised torso on display. The three other boys stopped, stunned.

- James having heard his friends arriving, turned calm and collected towards Peter and Remus ignoring Sirius who was torn between stunned and horrified while looking at his best friend and his younger brother. “Great Pete, go fetch my bag for me please? I need my emergency kit out it. Rem, I need you to come over here and take over holding him still. You’re stronger than I am. I need him still while I treat his injuries.”

- No one moved for a second, but then Remus stepped up, sliding his hands over James where he was keeping Regulus’s hands, and shuffled so his leg was between the shorter dark haired boys’ legs. Peter ran off to fetch the required material and to grab his own bag as well. He carried a few pain potions and a small bottle of dittany since some of their pranks could get a little messy and accidents liked to happen.

- Peter returned, quickly handing James the necessary premade kit, and then handing over the extra bottles from his own bag. James rewarded the short blond boy with a large grin, and a quick “Awesome job Pete”, before cleaning out the cuts. Dittany was applied and Remus used his free hand to smother the noises that Regulus made when the solution stung his skin. Cuts were cleaned then wrapped , or covered with plasters that Remus pulled from his own pocket. When the cuts were handled, and the scars that James thought might benefit from a small amount of Dittany were treated, James picked up his wand again, set it against Regulus’s broken ribs, and cast the necessary spell to reset the bones. A small snapping sound was heard as the bones shifted and snapped together again. All the boys winced in sympathy. Sadly their adventures meant that broken bones were all to common. They knew exactly how that spell felt.

- Sirius stood there stunned as his friends set about cleaning and treating his baby brother. His baby brother who was covered in bruises and cuts and scars. His torso looked so much like Sirius’s own. Sirius felt tears start to build in his eyes. How could he have left his baby brother to those, those.... Merlin was there a word bad enough to describe them?

- At James nod, Remus removed his hand from the young Black’s mouth, and James quickly held up a potion vial from Peter’s bag so that he could drink. But Regulus refused to open his mouth. James rolled his eyes. “It’s a pain reliever. Now drink it or I’ll make you, you stubborn ass!” Regulus refused again. He wasn’t weak. He didn’t need that. He wasn’t weak.

- Sirius finally spoke. “Drink the potion Reg, he’s not kidding. He’ll force it down your throat if needed. Trust me, he’s done it damn enough times to me. It’s just a pain potion. I promise you little brother.” Regulus’s looked deeply at Sirius, but didn’t open his mouth. Sirius sighed, took the potion from James hand, and tipped a mouthful down his own throat. “See? I promise Reg. It’s not a trick.”

- Still, the younger Black refused. James apprently got impatient. So he took the potion from Sirius, slid real close to Remus and Regulus and squeezed the younger boy’s jaw hard until his mouth opened. Hooking his fingers into the boy’s mouth, James poured the rest of the potion into his mouth. Quickly he covered his mouth, pinched his nose and leaned in to whisper in Regulus’s ear. “Swallow.”

-If Regulus could have, he would have whimpered. Potter was unfair, Regulus couldn’t not follow that command. And the potion was swallowed with no more fighting. Potter gave him a smile and nodded his head feeling him swallow the potion. “Good boy.” James released Regulus’s mouth, and nose, noddd at Remus to let him go and stepped back. Regulus slid down the wall, into a boneless heap. His shirt a mess, his eyes red rimmed and his mind a confused melted puddle of sexual frustration. Why did Potter have to have that affect on him.

- Sirius joined his brother on the floor. Pulled the younger man against himself and started rocking them. Regulus was crying he realized, and immediately felt ashamed, trying to hide the evidence by wiping the proof away. But Sirius didn’t care, and the other three had settled down into their chairs. Guarding the boys on the floor from sight with their bodies if anyone should pass by. The brothers rocked on the floor both of them crying, for a couple of minutes before Sirius lifted Regulus’s head and made the boy look him in the eye.

- “I’m not letting you go back there. Not now, not ever. If Mr. and Mrs. Potter don’t want to take you in, I’ll find us a flat. You’re not going anywhere again without me. I shouldn’t have ever left you there alone with those... things! I’m so sorry little brother. I’m so so so sorry.” Regulus could do nothing but dive back into his brother’s arms. Sirius apologized to him. Sirius was going to let Regulus stay with him. He wouldn’t have to go back. He could have his big brother back. Merlin, that’s all Regulus has ever wanted. He wanted to be under Sirius’s protective arm again. To not have to fight and sneer at him. He just wanted his brother.

-“Thank you! Thank you!! I’m sorry!! I’m sorry Siri!! I’ll be better I promise!!! I’m not like them I swear! I didn’t want to do any of it! I tried to be strong but I’m not you!! Please don’t make go back to them.” Sirius’s shushed him, rocking him and muttering about how he’s not letting him go. They won’t hurt him anymore. Regulus eventually reached a point where he wasn’t crying anymore, and sat up. His eyes were blood shot but he was lighter looking. No longer haunted by his parent’s abuse and suffering alone.

- After a couple more minutes, when both brothers were decidedly more calm, James spin his chair around to face them and leaned in close. “Now that you’ve had a few minutes to let that out. Sirius Orion Potter-Black! How dare you think Mum and Dad wouldn’t accept Regulus. He’s family! Of course they’ll let him stay. Honestly!! I’ll write mum a letter tonight and let her know, so I’d expect a letter in the morning from her and dad, for each of you. Now. Regulus, you can’t go back down to the dungeons. It’s not safe and I don’t trust those people. No brother of Sirius’s is going anyway dangerous without me trying my best to protect them. So when we leave here, we’ll report to McGonagall. She’ll help us sort you out.”

-Regulus suddenly understood why Sirius was willing to trust this boy. Why he would do anything James asked him. Because James Potter was the kind of man who helped others, long before he thought of himself. Who accepted a second child from the darkest family in their world, and the only thought James had was how to protect those two boys. He adopted Sirius, and looked to be well on his way to adopting Reg as well. Sirius has stated before he would die for James. Regulus understood now, James would do anything for his friends, whether that be fighting the world, or laying down his life for them. Regulus understood now, Sirius didn’t leave him behind for just a friend, he left him for an older brother who loved and protected him. And now he was bringing Reg into that brother’s sphere.

- The five boys gathered there supplies and gear. Remus grabbed Regulus’s bag, and gently batted the boys attempts to take it himself. “No you’re injured. I’ve got it.” It was spoken softly, and with a small grin that melted caramel colored eyes. Remus Lupin was handsome, and just as kind as James. Sirius was right, his friends were amazing. James and Sirius tucked him up under their arms, which were interlaced on his shoulders. Remus took the front, his wand strategically kept in his empty hand. Peter took up the back, his own wand held tightly in his hands. James and Sirius seemed to prefer keeping their wands out of sight, but he had no doubt they were easily accessible.

- They made their way to the deputy’s headmistress office. And immediately Remus provided a password to the portrait of a Scottish guardsman. A minute later, Minerva McGonagall, dresses far more casually then normal, opened the door. She stared at the boys in front of her before stepping aside and ushering them in. “ You know where everything goes, settle down, I’ll make tea.” The four older boys made quick work of removing the outer layer of their ribs, and hanging them in the closet with their bags. Then James and Sirius steered him towards the larger couch, while Peter and Remus settles together on an arm chair. When she returned McGonagall nodded and set about serving their tea. She had to asks Regulus how he took his but otherwise the action was done in silence.

- When they all had their tea and were settled down, she looked to James, her gaze both affectionate and stern. “What did you mauraders do this time?” James and Sirius shared a look before it was apparently decided that James took the lead.

- “As the Gryffindor Prefect, it is my duty to report when I suspect a student is being abused. I am willing, as long as the other three in this room, to provide pensive memories of the bruises and scars and cuts, that I’ve witnessed on one Regulus Arcturus Black. It is my belief that this abuse is from both home and school life. I am reporting this to you as my head of house, and Deputy Headmistress of Hogwarts.”

- The second the word “abuse” had come out of James’s mouth, Minerva was all business. The situation was explained, memories collected, and Regulus’s own recounting of the various abuse was put down on paper. Slughorn was contacted to be told that one student would be removed from his house for safety precautions, on the basis of inter house abuse. He was appalled. Two hours after they walked into her office, Regulus was given an emergency bed in Gryffindor tower.

- That night when he was tucked up in the bed, which was placed between James and Sirius’s own beds he noticed. He felt safe for the first time since he was little and had curled up in Sirius’s bed after a particularly bad nightmare. Not only was he not having to cast multiple shields and defenses to feel safe enough to sleep, but he also got his brother back. Sirius has barely taken his arm off of Regulus’s shoulders all night, and had planted no less then 10 kisses to his head. Regulus’s was like a shaking puppy, who was being given love for the first time. Remus and Peter were being so kind as well. Remus has given him an extra blanket, saying that he figured the tower might be a little cold, since Peter liked the wind from the window. Peter has immediately offered to sleep with it closed, not even a twitch of annoyance on his face as he offered. The lions den, was less scary then he thought, and more like a pack of affectionate pups.

-For the first time since Sirius Black had laid down in the Gryffindor tower dorm, he did so with a peace of mind he hadn’t realized was missing. He knew exactly how his brother was being treated and where his brother was, and could easily reach out and touch him if he wanted. Regulus hasn’t made a peep about Sirius being so affectionate, and has leaned into to every touch and kiss. Sirius was the happiest he could ever remembered. He had his three brothers, and his dearest wolf all in the same room, and they were for now, safe. Tomorrow might bring some challenges, but that was tomorrow, tonight? Tonight Sirius was happy.

- James Potter was grinning like a loon as he laid down to sleep. His baby brother was practically bouncing with joy, as his younger was finally in their dorm, safe and relatively unmarked. James was proud of his actions today. He had given Sirius his brother back, and had gained another brother from the same action. Regulus was a cute little brat. Awfully snarky once he forgot to be so nervous around them, and he matched Sirius’s brilliant tactician mind, with practiced ease. Yes, The young Black would make a fine prankster. Maybe they’d introduce him to marauding in the next couple of days. And just as he was falling asleep, James realized that it wasn’t just Lily Evan’s face and laugh that lulled him to sleep, a certain dark haired boy’s flustered face and quiet chuckle had joined in.

[all1e23]

Swallow [Pt.9]

Chapter: Life After You

Pairings: Bucky x Reader

Summary: Secrets are spilled and old wounds are reopened.

Warnings:  Adulty themes. Yes, I’m a grown-up, and I said adulty themes. General foreboding. Sweet, soft, protective Bucky. (Yes, that’s a warning. That could kill you!) Protective big brother Clint. 

A/N:   It’s the beginning of the end my loves.  Only 4 more parts left! I couldn’t get this part to come out right, but here it is! Music to listen to while you read? Everything Changes by Staind. Send me love because I’m needy.  No beta so read at your own risk. ;-)

***My fics are not to be saved or posted on any other sites without my written permission. Reblogs are my jam though! Thanks!*

There was something dark about the movement within and surrounding the clubhouse. A whispering feeling of dread was filling winds that were rustling the trees surrounding the twenty acres. The distressed, hurried actions made for an unfriendly scene when you pulled into your usual parking space. Everyone was preparing for a storm that had yet to show its face. There was no sign of how they would fair at the end of this, so preparations were for anything possible.

Cold winds or not, no one was going to take the chance.

For an outsider, things appeared to be no different from any other weekend.  A packed clubhouse wasn’t entirely uncommon for a Saturday night. There was always something going on; parties, barbeques, and MC events that never failed to get out of hand. This was unlike all of those times, though. The atmosphere around them hung onerous; there was a heaviness that clung to your skin and stiffness in each breath that made it nearly impossible to breathe.

This was no party. There was nothing to celebrate. Fear was the driving source behind the rushed and tense movements. The dark clouds hovering nearby were crawling closer with each passing seconds and rainfall was imminent. No matter how thoroughly they anticipated every possible outcome, there would be losses this time around that no one could stop.

Those very losses were the reason behind Steve’s frantic declaration that everyone needed to be close by. He needed to be with the club, but he couldn't bear to be away from his family. If something happened to Peggy or his babies, he would never be able to forgive himself.

Peggy and the twins, Henry and Emma, showed up that morning after locking their house down, per Steve’s begging. They were no longer babies, despite Steve’s wishful thinking. Explaining the sleepover to a pair of six-year-olds was not exactly Peggy’s shining moment as a mother. Too many questions she can’t answer. Too much of her own worry colored her words. Steve’s assurances did nothing to quell her uneasiness this time.

All she could do was hold on and hope there would be something left to rebuild when the tempest had passed.

Pepper arrived only a few minutes after you pulled up with Morgan and Peter following close behind her. You haven’t had a chance to meet Morgan, but just from the glimpse you caught as she made her way passed you sat atop Peter’s shoulders, she was without a doubt Tony’s daughter. You met Pepper’s eyes for a flash, but she was frantically trying to get her kids inside.

“Mom, it’s fine,” Peter dropped his arm over her shoulders as they walked through the rising grass. “Nothing is going to happen here. We are all good.” You couldn’t hear what Morgan responded with, but Pepper did not look pleased the look was followed by a sharp, “Tony!”

Pepper didn’t have the same calm demeanor that Peggy did. When she was overwhelmed, it showed. To be fair, she did live with Tony. Thankfully, Peter was by her side to help get their bags together and keep a close, protective eye on Morgan in Tony’s absence.

For a brief moment, when you were young and still innocent enough to believe this life and your love could occupy Bucky’s heart side by side, you had illusions of starting a family with Bucky.  The thought seems so silly now. It was a childish fantasy that was never meant to be a reality.

It was nice to see that some were able to have both.

Your eyes flicked from person to person. Everyone was there but Tony. You figured he has been locked away, eyes glued to those damn blue screens as he tried to figure out who their rat was and keep a close eye any and all movements made by Red Skulls. The thought left you feeling a tad queasy, but you kept moving forward. Natasha watched as you got closer to the front doors. You knew the look. She was disappointed with you, but what else was new? You’ve been in trouble since you came home.

It looked as if you were one of the last to arrive and the expression on everyone’s face, especially Bucky’s, made your chest burn with remorse. He was upset, anxious. From the glimpse at Clint’s face, he wasn’t happy with you either, but you weren’t sure what he was upset about or how much they knew.  

It seemed as if you were about to find out.

“Y/n,” Bucky growled as he advanced towards you. “What the hell happened? I told you how serious this is. You can’t just disappear like that! I thought--” He glanced at Clint and the rest of the group that was standing far too close for Bucky’s liking. The guys were quick to look away at the tremble in Bucky’s voice, but Peggy’s eyes softened a fraction as she ushered everyone but Clint back inside.

“I thought you ran like last time. I thought I lost you again.” Bucky admitted, his words are wrapped in doubt and past hurt you could do nothing to ease because you had the same hurt inked onto your heart. He didn’t want to admit that in front of Clint, but his heart was screaming, begging him to make sure and he simply couldn’t hold back.

You pressed a fleeting kiss to anxious lips and quietly assured him. “I promised you I wouldn’t run. I’m not running again. It’s you and me, forever. Although you did finish off the last of the pie. Maybe I should find someone who saves me the last piece of pie.” You purse your lips and glared playfully at him.

Bucky huffed out a constrained laugh and kissed your forehead, relief filling the shakey whispers he left against your skin. “I’ll buy you more. I’ll get you whatever you want. You just-- You had me scared for a minute there. I flashed back to five years ago and -- I, I can’t lose you again, pretty girl.”

His quivering confession lifted the tension in the air just long enough for your head to remind your heart how easily you betrayed him only hours before. The ache it brings you is laced with guilt, and it sent a shiver through you.

“Where did you go?” Clint interrupts your distorted notions.

Leave it to Clint see through you and get right to it. He was never much for subtlety. If the thought entered his head, it often left his lips before he could question whether it was a good idea; especially if he was upset and right now wasn’t pleased with you. You glanced back at your jeep towards the several boxes stacked up in the back and slowly lift up the bag in your hands.

“I was at our house. I figured I would need a few things if I had to stay here till this is all over. I must have just missed you guys.”

Bucky nodded, but there was still a flicker of apprehension dulling the sparkle in his eyes. Even after everything the two of you have shared since you came home, a large piece of him is waiting to wake up, and all of this be a dream -- a nightmare. One where you never came back at all, and he’s still living with that tear in his soul.

“Next time please let me know where you’re at, baby doll.”

“I should have. You’re right. I’m sorry, but you don’t have to worry. I’m not leaving you, Bucky. Never again.” Bucky wrapped his arms around your waist his hand gripping you as tight as he could without hurting you. An exchange a whispered of ‘I love yous’ and a few dozen kisses later Bucky resembled a somewhat calmer version of himself, no longer frightened with thoughts of old heartbreaks and melancholy daydreams.

For the time being, he was okay.

Bucky’s hand squeezed your waist once more as he ushered you inside, still whispering sugary words in your ear as you went. He couldn’t go long without getting his hands on you or telling you just how pretty you are. It has always been that way, but today it hangs heavy. Tainted and splintered. The gentle whispers and old pet names have been ruined by secrets and lies and guilt and Eddie.

Eddie took the only thing that’s ever been solely yours and infected it with deceit and treachery; it would be forever marred as such.

“I need to help Peggy get some of the kids settled you gonna be alright for a minute?” Bucky asked once you reached the threshold.

You laughed at his protectiveness. Even while you’re locked inside the safety of the clubhouse, he’s still trying to shield you. Part of you wondered how long that would stick around once he learned the truth, once he discovered what you had done. You quirked your head to the side a natural smile curling the edges of your lips.

“I think I can make it up a flight of stairs and into your room with no incidents.”

“Our room.” Bucky corrected you and placed a soft kiss to your lips.

“Right. Our room,” you echoed, softer this time because who knows how long it will be your room too. This wasn’t the place to dwell on things you couldn’t control. Too many eyes on you and too many opinions to be had once the truth finally broke; none of which would be on your side.

Except for Clint. He would always be on your side.

“What happened to your phone?” Clint inquired as you walked by him, leaving Bucky behind you. You were thankful for the reprieve if you were honest, but Clint wasn’t going to let you escape before he got some answers.

“Oh, it died, and I already packed my bag. So I couldn’t find my charger.” You let the lie roll off your tongue so easily you were beginning to wonder if you even knew what the truth was. Clint followed behind you without missing a step. He stepped into Bucky’s room and closed the door behind him. You knew what was coming. 

You could feel it -- blood or not.

“What were you really doing?”

And there was the question you were praying never came up. Clint had no idea how badly you wanted to just blurt it all out. How much you wanted to tell him where you had been and let him know what kind of trouble you were really in, but what good would it do? Clint couldn’t fix things, and he was already so disappointed you couldn’t stand to add anything else to your list of failures.

Not now. Not when you had so little time left.

“I see you’re talking to me again. I guess this means you’re no longer mad at me?” You asked purposely keeping your eyes downcast as you dropped your bags onto Bucky’s bed.

“This isn’t a joke, Y/n.” Clint snapped, voice tight and filled with dread. He was unmistakably scared of something, but you didn’t have the slightest clue as to what it could be. You could guess, though. If there was anyone besides Bucky that knew you, really knew you, it was Clint, and he knew when something wasn’t right.

“I was at our house picking up a few things.” You shrugged and tossed your old wooden box on the bed, ignoring your brother once again. It was the easiest way to aggravate him and hopefully get him to leave you alone. Your box of memories sat on the bed, watching you slowly come undone with each word you spoke.

“Bullshit. Maybe you went there and grabbed a few things, but it was on your way home. Where were you before that?” You turned your back towards him and started to pull your clothes out of your duffle bag, disregarding him and the question but Clint was done playing. He walked over and snatched the shirt you were folding out of your hands, he tossed it back on the bed and turned you around to meet his eyes.

“We just worked on your jeep I can check the mileage and figure out where you went from there.”

“I’m having senior year flashbacks.” You joked. Clint didn’t laugh. He crossed his arms over his chest and shrugged. “You wanna act like a teenager, I’ll treat you like one.”

The silence in the room reminded you of the morning Clint caught you sneaking in your bedroom window after sneaking out to spend the night with Bucky. He never did tell your dad or Buckys. He’s always known what you were doing before you did and he’s done everything he could to keep you from getting hurt. Why would this be any different? Either you did this alone, or you let your brother in and let him help you.

The pleading look in Clint’s eyes let you know you made the right choice; he would need your help and you needed his.

You pulled the card out of your back pocket and handed it over to Clint, but you couldn’t look him in the eye when you did. That had him worried. Hundreds, maybe thousands of scenarios went through his head, and all of them scared him shitless. There have been a handful of moments in his life when Clint caught you doing something stupid or reckless, and they almost always involved Bucky, but you’ve never been scared to talk to him, and at that moment you looked so afraid his stomach dropped like a brick.

Clint uncrumpled the small white card and read gleaming black letters; over and over. He must have read the damn thing twenty times.  There was no way he was reading it right. Eddie Brock wasn’t-- They thoroughly vet potential club members, so things like this don’t happen. No, no. No. There was a mistake. Eddie couldn’t be a cop, and he wasn’t working with his sister.

Not his bug.

One glance at the tears pooling in your eyes, and he just knew. You were with Eddie today and whatever you talked about involved the club. If he had to gamble, going by the tears catching in your lashes, Bucky was weaved into the threads of whatever this was.

“He threatened you with jail time, didn’t he?” Clint didn't need you to respond because he already knew, That’s how they worked. They go after the ones with the most to lose and out of everyone that was you. No one threatened his sister-- Cop or not.

“Stay here.” He ordered as turned on his heels, but you grabbed his arm and pulled him back before he could put one foot in front of the other. This couldn’t leave Bucky’s room. Once it did, it would be too late.  

“No! You can’t. He said he had information on the club and you. He said he could throw you in jail unless--”

“Unless what, Y/n?” Clint was begging for you to just give him something, anything he could go on.  “I can’t help if you don’t tell me what’s going on, bug.”

“Unless I testify against Steve and Bucky. If I testify against them, he said he won’t go after the rest of the club.” You spoke so softly he had to read your lips so he could catch what you were saying. It was much worse than he thought. He knew he should have ripped Eddie apart the moment he laid a hand on you.

“Do you have any idea what you’re messing with? You’re playing games you don’t understand.”

“I’m not trying to play any games.” You interpreted, frantic for him to understand. “I didn’t know what to do, Clint!”

That had him seeing red because you knew better than that. He knew you knew what to do the second you were in trouble -- no matter the cause.

“Why didn’t you tell Buck right away? The man quite literally worships the ground you walk on. He would do anything for you! You don’t think he would protect you even from the cops?!”

“I don’t know.” You shrugged and asked with a sniff. “What if Bucky thinks I’m the rat?”

Clint couldn’t even dignify that with an answer. Bucky could hear the words from your own lips. You could tell him yourself that you betrayed him, that you sold him, Steve and the club out and Bucky would still defend you. Clint doubted he would even believe you; no matter the proof and no matter who it came from.

“Let me talk to Steve and Bucky first, okay? I’ll handle everything.” You nodded and sank down onto Bucky’s bed.

“What about Bucky? Or the club?” You asked before Clint could pull the door open. He looked back at you and shook his head. He really thought you would have finally got it.

“Sis, if you think for one second Bucky would let anyone in this club lay a finger on you you’re not as smart as I thought you were.”

---------

“Steve, got a minute?”  

“Yeah, Tony.” Steve followed Tony into the room and arched his brow as he watched the shorter man close the door. “What did you find that needs this kind of secrecy?”

Tony tossed several photos on the table and crossed his arms over his chest as Steve took in the images. “Eddie is a cop?” Steve growled, flipping through each picture of Eddie. “How did we miss that? He’s the rat, and we opened the damn door!”

“That’s not all. Kind of the least of our problems big guy.” Tony pulled the image out of the stack of photos and met Steve’s gaze, “She met with him today. I hacked into the police system and did a little search to see if Eddie popped up on any red-light cameras, security cameras.  I wanted to get an idea of who we were dealing with. He went inside roughly five minutes before she did. She left first, in a huff but he followed quickly after.”

Steve’s eyes traveled over the grainy images. They were hard to make out. Y/n’s jeep was easy to spot on the traffic cameras, but there wasn’t a single shot of her license plate. She could easily explain that away, but what looked bad for everyone was the image of her entering the diner shortly after Eddie. The swallow on her wrist stuck out like a sore thumb through the blur of the poor quality of the photograph.

“I thought it would be better if you spoke to Bucky about it.”

Tony was right. Something like this coming from anyone but him would end badly. Bucky would go to the ends of the Earth to keep Y/n safe. Everyone knew that and Steve hoped they knew better than to disrespect her or Bucky with ridiculous rumors and a shortage of facts.

“This doesn’t leave this room,” Steve told him quietly, still staring at the images spread across the table in front of him. “You tell no one. Not Pepper. Not Peter. No one. I need to speak to Buck.”

"Yeah, yeah. I figured. So, you thinking…"

He took a deep breath and met Tony’s gaze. "I think the club, all of us are in trouble and by the time this is all over, I think I’m going to lose my best friend."

“That’s what I was afraid you were going to say,” Tony muttered.

Steve lost track of time, he was unsure how long he had been staring at the black and white prints staining the cherry wood table. How long is too long when death is knocking on the front door? The look of annoyance growing on Tony’s face hinted that it had been too long. He squared his shoulders and gave a sharp tug to his leather. Persona in place. Steve had to take a backseat, right now the club and Bucky needed that.

The large double doors swung open, and Steve scanned the common room stopping when his eyes landed on a mop of brown hair and thin chain holding a delicate piece of the man’s heart.

“Hey, Buck?” Bucky looked up, and his smile fell at the look on Steve’s face. “I need to talk to you a second.”

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