#there are so many good ones out there | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hjbender · 2 years

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Nice father-son dynamic you got there. Be a shame if something

HAPPENED TO IT

#obikin #quiobi #jinnobi #kanezra #analuke #vaderluke #and by 'something' i mean 'something gay'#shoutout to all the father/son ships at sea #there are so many good ones out there #one can be a father and a daddy too

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hinamie · 2 months

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I don't want to regret the way I lived

#my art #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #fanart #jjk fanart #jujutsu kaisen fanart #yuji itadori #gojo satoru #nobara kugisaki #nanami kento #choso kamo #junpei yoshino #jjk leaks #jjk spoilers #jjk manga spoilers #this idea started as a 2 part series . then my braincells decided to spark and supplied 7 PAGES #'did you sleep hina' no #ws looking up mentally stable things like 'who has died in jjk' smh i love my hyperfixation media im sooooo glad so many ppl r DEAD #i *could* have included more ppl but i think this is a good crew. this is a yuuji emotional support crew #also Was gna include his grandpa final panel but i Did Not Want To #he is implied through th dialogue #side note i donot like how i cn see this scenario playing out . ..yuuji this isnt ur stop u r monopoly voice Just Visiting ok >:(#anyway I broke my own heart with this and ik i hyped it up a lot but i hope that its not just me...#hope i did not hype it up fr nothing and no one else finds it devastating :((((( that would b humbling in the worst way #pls ...join the happy party train.......i hate it here i suffered pls :<<<<#also !!!! colours in this !! i cooked i fear . adding th first bit of warm hitting yuuji's face after th first 2 panels....#ive never had that kind of experience while drawing before it was wild . painful ! but wild.#the whole transition from p 2->3 might b the most emotionally moving piece ive ever made to me #not 2 sing my own praises tho i will shut up ! i wil. nap

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meanbossart · 3 months

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There, he got some new underwear.

#this one goes out to the fifteen or so asks I got about his terrible-not-good beige briefs #though I cannot many any promises about the lifespan of these ones either #art #du drow #astarion

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ghosted-jazz · 2 months

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Species Swap AU! Retired couple gets a fairy godchild to help repair their relationship

#fairly oddparents a new wish #fairly oddparents #hazel wells #fop cosmo #fop wanda #fop species swap au #god it felt so wrong drawing cosmo and wanda not green and pink. the assignment was to make them human but blonde cosmo feels so cursed #shoutout to my friend who kept pointing out how depressed i made human wanda and cosmo look. good. they're 5 fights away from a divorce #Cosmo and Wanda start with the dynamic they have in the later seasons of the og show but end with the loving dynamic they have in new wish #fairy Hazel's outfit is from 'Crock to the Future' but with blue pants and no hat or bag. Fairy GodParents dress formal so shes fancy #I know Hazel got a fairy design in the new episode but there's too many fairies with blue hair ok- i am stealing the sparkles though #Peri and Dev incoming. still deciding whether Dev would be an anti-fairy or just a regular jealous one. Peri gets to be a dentist #my art

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giantkillerjack · 1 year

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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

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inkskinned · 2 months

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actually sometimes being neurodivergent is great bc you have a particular kind of Silly Mode that just . manifests glory. harmless fun is my precious side quest & i have a high score in whimsy. like okay if i gotta be the first dork in the dance pit it's gonna be me and this random toddler and we're gonna avril-style rock ouuuuttt

#i also like starting applause i'm really good at it and have a high score in it #i make entire groups cheer a lot. my friends are used to it . i am bolstered by so many of them being theatre kids #im like. let's celebrate! :) a guy did a thing well!!! :)#once we helped someone parallel park and it was SUCH a hard road to do it on #this is in boston. so death be upon drivers. also it was during st. anthony's feast. in the north end. iykyk #and we helped her get in there (one of my friends tbh stood in traffic for her)#and we cheered when she finally parked. she got out and she was crying and laughing and was like #''that was the hardest thing ive ever done ur so sweet''' and meanwhile we were PARTYING #just stone cold sober but like YEAH GIRL YOU DID THE HARD THING FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!!!#i've been bullied for so much lol i am immune to most insults at this point bc im like #girl when i was 12 i'd already heard every insult and good lord were they specific. just plain ''crazy'' aint it

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stuckinapril · 9 months

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friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me