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butterflydm · 1 year

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wot reread: a memory of light (chapters 32-36)

spoilers for a memory of light, the final book.

Ah. It's a Mat PoV. I never really know what to expect out of Mat PoV these days, I have to admit. Early-to-middle Mat is always an enjoyable read, but I learned to despise reading Mat PoV during CoT & KoD, the two books that made me dislike Mat. The Sanderson Mat PoV chapters have varied wildly between "ugh I hate this"; "huh, that's intriguing"; and "Mat! <3". So, yeah, never know what I'm about to get when I start a Mat PoV these days.

2. Mat considers going out onto the battlefield again but changes his mind when Tuon glares at him from her ten-foot tall throne (...someone is overcompensating; that thing is twice as tall as she is). We get another of those bizarre thoughts from Mat where he praises Tuon for things that he dislikes from anyone else (Min did the same thing in her recent PoV too -- she's all "I don't respect any titles... except yours, Empress! I'll kiss the ground you walk on, Empress! I'll tell you anything you want, Empress!" ...I am mildly paraphrasing). I mentioned this earlier, how Mat starts having super-weird "I was born a native Seanchan" thoughts at a certain point, and this really feels like one of them.

In this instance, he claims that Tuon's ~way of giving orders~ "gives him a thrill", which... I'm torn between two things:

A. it just sends me right back to slave-conditioning (go back to Bethamin's Rules of Slave-Breaking back in Winter's Heart! It is downright eerie how much Tuon followed the rules there in how she interacted with Mat in CoT & KoD; it reminds me of how the most heartbreaking damane moments are when the channelers stop fighting and start desperately wanting to please their mistresses).

but

B. his actions don't really seem to back up that he enjoys getting ordered around by Tuon? Or enjoys watching her order other people around? It might be a thing, I guess, where his body has been conditioned into getting a thrill out of her being a slave-owner but emotionally and intellectually he's turned off by it?

3. Hmm, so Tuon gets incredibly jealous about Mat being in the same room as other women (who aren't slaves), but she doesn't want him looking at her with lust either. Interesting data point.

This is also a place where we really dive into the toxic ways that Mat is using the phrase 'Aes Sedai', where it basically is twisted to mean 'woman with power that I'm scared of' -- Tuon is an Aes Sedai in Mat's thoughts here, despite never actually channeling or having gone through the training to become an Aes Sedai. She's 'one of them' because she is a woman who is capable of having a power that Mat doesn't understand. If Mat had gone to Merrilor and learned what damage his fear and mistrust of Aes Sedai had caused in Caemlyn, he might have learned a healthier way to think about Aes Sedai.

4. Ah, @markantonys, here's that line: "You're doing a fine job of persuading Tuon not to use damane" (Mat sarcastically thinks to himself).

?????

It really is a fascinating/horrifying/mind-boggling contrast between what Mat's intentions apparently are and what he's actually done when he interacts with Tuon. Now, this is not the first allusion to the idea that Mat wants Tuon to stop using damane -- he told Min a few chapters back that "Rand" would want her to selectively use her viewings to try to encourage Tuon to think more favorably about Aes Sedai (Min proceeded to completely ignore him and just spilled literally everything to Tuon that she wanted to know) -- but it's the first time that Mat has actively tried to claim that he has been attempting to persuade Tuon on the matter of the damane.

So, in theory, Mat wants to persuade Tuon to stop using damane.

But in practice, Mat has always been silent and complicit when it comes to Tuon's use and abuse of damane, just as he is in this scene here. It kinda seems like the only way Mat is willing to risk himself for the damane around Tuon is by trying to place other people in her path who will argue on their behalf.

Mat is "unnerved" by how quickly the new Sharan damane has taken to her captivity. I mean, I could say the same of you, Mat.

5. Hmm, Mat is charming Galgan now. Maybe I spoke too soon on thinking that Galgan would no longer try to murder Tuon now that Mat is next in line for the throne, displacing Galgan's claim. If he ends up liking Mat more than he likes Tuon, then Mat might 'accidentally' become the (first?) Emperor of the Seanchan.

Ugh, now Mat is using "marath'damane" instead of "channelers". ...and, by contrast, Galgan is using "Aes Sedai" on Mat's orders. Hmm.

I guess we're supposed to be wondering who will 'win' in the corruption game between Mat and Tuon -- does Tuon manage to break him into being a proper husband-slave or does Mat manage to reach whatever tiny shreds of empathy might still lurk inside Tuon's heart?

6. idk why Mat keeps thinking that Tuon's behavior is mysterious and a puzzle to figure out. It's the omens. She's told you this. He wants to think that she's deeper than she really is, I guess. I suppose if I were trapped in a similar situation, I'd be doing my best to make the best of it too (but that runs into my other big problem of: Jordan's fatalism infecting all the characters even when it's contrary to their past behavior).

7. Tuon is currently interrogating Min on all the omens that she sees for every member of the Blood that's around. And Min just, you know, obeys. For whatever reason.

"He had an inkling of what Tuon might be capable of, if she grew displeased with Min."

Hmm.

"He loved her-- Light, he was pretty sure that he did. But he also let himself be a little afraid of her. He'd have to keep watch so that Tuon didn't decide to 'educate' Min."

Hmm.

Much like Mat himself, Min is in an 'honored' position... but Mat is very aware that this will not actually protect her from getting 'educated' if she displeases his wife-owner. And, once again, Mat gives us nothing he loves about her. Yet when it comes to why he's "a little afraid" of her, Mat does have reasons -- what he's alluding to here is that he's worried that she might hurt his friend's girlfriend (because he's seen Tuon hurt other innocent people in the past).

And we know the kinds of lessons that sul'dam teach. To quote from The Great Hunt again:

Renna took the chair, frowning at Egwene. "I must punish you severely for this. We will both be called to the Court of the nine Moons -- you for what you can do; I as your sul'dam and trainer -- and I will not allow you to disgrace me in the eyes of the Empress. I will stop when you tell me how much you love being damane and how obedient you will be after this. And, Tuli. Make me believe every word."

8. As a result of Min's reading of the 'omens' around one of the Blood, Tuon (through Selucia) announces that the woman will be executed, making both Mat and Min startle severely. Wow, maybe it's a bad idea to hand that kind of surveillance 'technology' over to an unhinged dictator, Min? Who could have guessed?

Anyway, Min is completely shocked by this (completely predictable) reaction from Tuon at an 'omen' that hints at potential betrayal.

Mat's thoughts about Tuon, the woman that he "loves":

Mat shivered. He didn't like it when Tuon got like this. That stare of hers... it seemed like the stare of another person. A person without compassion. A statue had more life to it.

That's literally just Tuon being Tuon, bro. Not sure what to tell you. This is the way she behaves the majority of the time. If you dislike this about her, then you're going to be unhappy for most of your marriage.

9. Min 'wins' this round pretty much the same way that Mat 'won' Tuon telling him that he was more than a toy to her -- she says that she won't tell any more omens to Tuon if Tuon continues to behave this way. If Tuon executes people based solely on Min's 'omens', then Min will stop giving her any omens.

I will say... this has been pretty consistent in the narrative so far -- Tuon only really responds to the threat of her toys being taken away from her. Anything less that that and she will continue to push the boundaries of making someone uncomfortable. Only the threat of losing her toys entirely really makes it through to her brain.

Mat worries here that Min's "lack of respect" towards Tuon is going to get her executed, but for the moment, Tuon agrees that she will not kill anyone based on what Min says they 'might' do.

...given how 'well' Tuon has kept her word so far, I'm pretty sure that she'll have trumped up an excuse to kill this member of the Blood in the next couple of days. But she'll be able to convincingly lie to Min that it wasn't because of her viewing.

I do think it's weird/fascinating how Min seems to view her 'job' with Fortuona as an all-or-nothing affair -- Mat suggested that she pick and choose what she tells Fortuona in an attempt to influence her, but Min seems to feel like she can either tell Fortuona everything or nothing at all. But we don't get any reason why that's the case. Especially since Tuon is a lot more interested in hearing Min's viewings about other people than the ones about herself, which was something that Min claimed she did for Rand as a ~special exception~ to her normal policy of respecting people's privacy. Again, why is Min going out of her way for the Seanchan? Tuon wouldn't actually know if Min lied to her about this.

10. Awww, Egwene is speaking in code to Mat about his medallion so as not to give his secret away to the enemy Seanchan. It's too late, Egwene. Setalle Anan betrayed Mat's secrets long ago, but it's very sweet of you to care.

Okay, so Elayne joins the, uh, conference call at this point ("thick with child". Um, exactly how far along do you think she is, Sanderson?) and so I am going to try to figure out what, if anything, she knows about the Mat situation. Thom told her a heroic story about Mat freeing slaves. Perrin told her Mat was doing "something" with the Seanchan. She's been pretty busy since then, so I wonder if Egwene has had time to update her on anything.

Mat wants to merge all the forces together. Mat's thoughts on Elayne: "She maintained the posture of a queen, but her disheveled hair and clothing burned in several places indicated what she'd been through." Meanwhile, ~Fortuona~ sits in pristine silks and lets Mat do her talking for her. I suppose she views him as acting as her Voice-husband-slave right now.

11. Elayne and Mat are the two people talking over the tactics at this meeting, btw (so consider that another spit in the eye to Perrin for trying to diss Elayne's tactical knowledge). Mat laying out the plan and Elayne questioning the details and reasoning.

Elayne doesn't acknowledge Tuon's existence at all during this entire section. She is absolutely and 100% only talking to Mat, and there's never even a mention of her looking over and noticing Tuon. She also doesn't seem to be treating Mat any differently than she had before.

I am so curious about Elayne's thoughts on this situation! Did Thom tell her about Mat's marriage being an accident when he came to Merrilor? Does she even know that Mat is married to the Seanchan Empress? She knows he's married to someone, because of his letter, but does she know who?

...also, she doesn't mention the Horn of Valere and Mat needing to blow it. That's maybe the one thing here that does indicate that she is aware of Tuon & the Seanchan even if she doesn't acknowledge them, not wanting to give away the Horn's believed ties to Mat. Which implies that she's ignoring ~Fortuona~ as a deliberate snub (good for her).

If the "Two Rivers coat" that Mat has been wearing was sourced by the person that Elayne found for Mat (by his request), then he is also wearing clothes that were supplied by Elayne during this entire meeting. Seanchan breeches and an Andoran coat.

Also, Elayne telling Mat, "I hope you know what you're doing," triggers the dice in his head. Is that... is that about more than the battle, Elayne? Are you speaking in code, Elayne? Are you talking about Tuon, Elayne?

Side note: Elayne doesn't get the whole "ugh no, she's a Dreaded Aes Sedai" treatment from Mat here even though she literally is one and Tuon is, in fact, not. I'm guessing because Mat isn't scared of Elayne?

12. Elayne then "passionately" explains and defends Mat's plan to Tam and, idk, some other leaders in the armies on her side.

lol so much at Galad's thoughts about how Perrin is so ~reasonable~ compared to other leaders like Elayne and how maybe the Whitecloaks should settle in the Two Rivers after the Last Battle. Perrin doesn't. He doesn't actually like you, Galad.

It is interesting that Galad is thinking of them as "Whitecloaks" though. When did that start?

Haha, just I was noting that, Galad also notices that he just did that and is puzzled at himself for it.

Elayne does not mention the Seanchan at all here, only "Mat" this and "Mat" that. Nothing about the Seanchan.

13. When Perrin asks Slayer if he thinks he'll be rewarded by the Dark One, Slayer tells Perrin "The Dark One does not discard useful tools" (citing the Forsaken as evidence) and I'm reminded of the many many commonalities that the Seanchan and the Shadow share all over again, because that is just about as true about TDO as it is about the Seanchan -- which is to say, sure, as long as you're still useful, you won't be discarded.

The Seanchan Empire is going to be the Great Evil of the Fourth Age, one way or another. I don't think there's any way for anyone to stop that. The poison is too baked into their culture as it currently stands, and the poison drips through to the people ("the poison drips through" is apparently a quote from Succession, which I've never seen, but that's a fantastic line).

14. Faile is hanging out with the Redarms, who are worrying about "Lord Mat" and wishing that they could be with him to protect him from the Seanchan. So that's now two sets of groups that care deeply about Mat and want to save him from the Seanchan that he's gotten himself tangled up with: Egwene & the Band of the Red Hand's Redarms. So it is 'known' among the general army that Mat is hanging out with the Seanchan (though not that he's married to ~the Empress~), so Elayne definitely knew last chapter when she was completely ignoring Tuon and only talking to Mat. And Faile is here to deliver the Horn to Mat (presumably without tipping it off to the Seanchan with him what they're doing?). To everyone except Faile herself, though, the delivery is "tabac from the Two Rivers" for Mat to enjoy during the battle, as a treat from The Amrylin.

Setalle Anan is also part of this group, it seems, and so is Olver, who is not dead (no thanks to Mat).

A bubble of evil sets their planned Gateway awry and they end up in the Blight instead of Merrilor.

15. ...Melaine is apparently "near to term" and just about ready to give birth. Which would mean that it's been less than nine months since Min first arrived in Caemlyn back in Lord of Chaos (and yet six of those months have apparently happened after Winter's Heart?).

It has been "many days" since Rand went up into the mountain of Shayol Ghul.

Aviendha catches Graendal in the act of attempting to influence the new commander who was put in place after Ituralde was taken out of command, and has an encounter with the red-veiled Aiel, realizing that they are the men who were sent into the Blight to die with honor upon realizing they could channel and that they have been Turned by TDO's channelers.

side note: this does remind me that one group that ends up not having a single Darkfriend in it are the Aiel Wise Ones. Not all of them are great people -- some of them are pretty awful -- but even the worst of the Shaido Wise Ones are not Darkfriends, I'm pretty sure? And no Aiel clan chiefs are Darkfriends either. No one who has been to Rhuidean and lived, essentially. Were the glass columns filtering out Darkfriends in addition to filtering out people who couldn't handle the truth about the Aiel's past?

16. Ah, I think this is our first real introduction to The Dark One as Entropy & the End of All Things. TDO 'wants' (or is driven by its nature) to consume the Pattern and leave nothing behind. I think, out of all the Darkfriends in the book series, that only Ishamael/Moridin actually understands TDO's goal. All the others are scrambling for temporal power and think they're actually going to rule the world after TDO 'wins' but there isn't going to be a world to rule. Only Ishamael/Moridin understands that the endgame is the ending of existence itself.

In the show, they've already tied us into this concept -- Dana, who gets dreams (presumably from Ishamael), talked to Rand about how TDO wants to end 'suffering' by 'breaking the Wheel'. So the show already set us up for the endgame battle which is great because it means (as long as Rafe & co know in advance that they're writing the final season), the show can always pivot to our endgame because they've already planted the seeds.

I'm curious about how much they'll tie Dana's argument into the Seanchan invasion. Because TDO is an existential calamity for everyone, but the Seanchan are an existential calamity for channelers in particular (though we do also have da'covale and I definitely hope that the show doesn't forget about them the way that it kinda feels like the books forgot about them). Once the Seanchan are on the scene, the question of "is it better to suffer in agony and humiliation for hundreds of years with no hope of escape or it is better to just end that suffering?" becomes an active question for the majority of the main cast (Moiraine, Egwene, Nynaeve, Elayne, and Rand too when/if the male a'dam comes into play -- and especially Egwene, who goes through that suffering personally).

17. Poor Faile actually has to worry about travel logistics -- they're stuck in the Blight and it would take 'months' to walk to Merrilor. Shame she doesn't have Mat's magical non-channeling teleportation skills.

However, they do see that they're not too far off from the peak of Shayol Ghul itself and decide to head in that direction, since some of Rand's troops should be there. But Faile worries that there's a Darkfriend in their caravan and worries even more that someone on the side of the Shadow knows that she has the Horn of Valere.

Somewhat nearby, as she is also in the Blasted Lands, after a lengthy battle with the red-veiled Aiel, Aviendha's group gets battered by Graendal, with one of the Aes Sedai getting compelled and two others getting killed.

18. Olver still hates the Shaido (and all Aiel by extension) for killing his parents and yet had zero lasting negative reaction to the Seanchan invading a city where he was living, causing destruction and death all around him and deeply injuring someone he cared about a lot (the wall falling on Mat). The contrast between Olver's trauma from the Shaido invasion and his lack of trauma from the Seanchan invasion really does remain so baffling. The Seanchan invasion should have brought back so many horrible memories for him, but he was basically the same in WH as he was in ACoS -- all he cared about was snuggling into a grown woman's breasts.

So Olver knows that Noal is dead, "filtered through what the Lady Moiraine had shared about what had happened at the Tower of Ghenjei" (haha so she did get around to saying more than "the Wheel weaves as the Wheel wills" eventually). He also knows that Mat has "run off to join the Seanchan" (parental figure abandonment -- and Mat has not even spared a single thought for Olver this entire time, btw. Olver is worrying that Mat might die and Mat hasn't even had a passing thought about Olver's wellbeing; though I focus on the loss of Mat & Rand's friendship because of how... shallow... their reunion was, Mat's relationship to Olver also got shredded by Mat's off-the-page choice to desert his people).

Anyway, poor kid. He actually feels like a kid here, too, instead of a walking advertisement letting us know that Mat Cauthon Leers At Women And Teaches Kids To Do It Too, which is basically all he was for most of ACoS-KoD. He worries that he's going to end up all alone (again) as his companions die or abandon him. He has signs of trauma from Mat abandoning him here, too -- he thinks if he's able to train up and prove to Mat that he's useful, maybe Mat won't abandon him (again).

19. It sounds like the 'essence' of the Dark One in Shayol Ghul is basically acting like a miniature black hole -- it's trying to suck them into it. It's already eaten Nynaeve's shawl.

For Nynaeve and Moiraine, about an hour has passed. Rand's foot touched the darkness when he went to meet Moridin sword-to-sword and now the two of them appear frozen in time & locked in place. The wind pulls and tears at Nynaeve and Moiraine's clothing but Rand and Moridin are untouched by it.

20. Carefully moving around the chamber, clinging from rock to rock to keep herself from being pulled into the black hole, Nynaeve finds Alanna behind one of the rocks in the chamber. She's chained to the wall and has a bleeding wound in her side (matching Rand's, perhaps?).

Nynaeve realizes that the reason that Alanna here is to die at some point during Moridin's encounter with Rand, hopefully leaving him vulnerable due to the broken bond and making him easier prey for Moridin (and/or TDO? Though Nynaeve thinks here in terms of making Rand more physically vulnerable, making him more emotionally susceptible to TDO's arguments also seems like a likely motive to me?).

She wonders why Rand didn't notice Alanna's presence -- is he just so used to reflexively ignoring her? Nynaeve is feeling frustrated that she is unable to heal Alanna with the Power, because all her Power is in the link with Rand.

...oh, hey! I bet that's what Rand was feeling earlier! He could feel that someone he was bonded to had gotten hurt but the feeling was weird and he couldn't trace it. I bet that was about Alanna getting stabbed and it was wonky because it happened in the Weird Time Dilation Room.

21. Hmm, Mat is having memory issues. He blames his dice here on when "Egwene gave him control of the armies" but it was Elayne's words to him that triggered this set of rolling dice. We know because we were in his PoV when it happened.

Mat sees an old Andoran man that almost triggers an old memory for him, one of the ones that the dagger stole (it would have been when Rand was taking care of him on the trip to Caemlyn -- another one of the shoes that never quite fell for Mat, characterization-wise, is him getting back his foggy memories. We've seen a time or two that they are still in there, not just in this moment, but also back in Ebou Dar, when he saw the Darkfriend who attacked him and Rand in the stables). Mat actually remembering that everything Rand did to help him during the time he was sick with the dagger seems like one of those things that will inevitably happen post-canon, because the memories are still there, just hiding.

22. When Mat sees "his" Deathwatch guard among the working people here, he compares them to "wolves among the sheep". Mat does see it as a bonus that he was able to pull the armies together and pick his own battlefield but he's still pretty worried about the battle ahead.

Tuon gave Mat a new eyepatch to wear -- bright red. To remind people of the wound underneath? We know that she likes the active reminder to everyone that Mat has been bloodied in battle. Or we do get a reminder that the Deathwatch guards (all slaves) also wear a distinctive shade of red, so it's probably also another badge of her ownership over Mat.

23. When Mat tries to avoid the Deathwatch guard that are coming to "collect" him to be brought to Tuon's tent (the narrative keeps bringing up things that are so reminiscent of Tylin's behavior towards Mat), he runs right into Egwene and a group of Aes Sedai. Also... it's interesting that he thinks of it as "Tuon's tent" and not a tent that they share together.

When he mentions that he's running away from the Deathwatch guard, Egwene tells him that she's glad he's defecting back to the Westlands but the middle of the Last Battle is maybe not the best time. He walks back with Egwene (& Gawyn and Leilwin née Egeanin) back over to the Aes Sedai area of the camp as they talk.

24. Mat says that the reason he's running from the guard is not because he's defecting back to the Westlands but because Tuon wants him to sit in judgement over potential criminals (...in the middle of the Last Battle?). "Anytime a soldier is seeking the Empress's mercy for a crime, I'm supposed to sit in judgement!"

Mat thinks here that he's not going to 'order men to be executed' and, yeah, I keep going back to what Renna said to Egwene, all those books ago. Perhaps you believe that because you are valuable now, you will be allowed license. Or I think back to Mat's worries that Min's "lack of respect" towards Tuon will get her killed.

Because it kinda sounds like it's been made clear to him that "sit in judgement" means "condemn people to death" and that Mat would risk personal punishment if he rules against what Tuon would want him to rule. Is Mat worrying about how hard he can push Tuon without it painfully snapping back on him?

25. He obliquely asks Egwene if they've found 'it' (the Horn of Valere) yet. Hey, Mat, if you were so worried about that, maybe you shouldn't have defected to the Seanchan at the beginning of this book? Just a thought.

Yeah, we get a reminder of how easily Mat rewrites his own memory here when he talks about how he did all the hard work of finding the Horn and the dagger was barely a consideration for him. So for anyone wondering why I keep poking at Mat's professed reasons for doing things and doubting the surface level of what he says -- page 611 of the hardback copy of AMoL:

"It seems nobody can remember straight but me. I hunted down that bloody Horn like a madman. And, I'll mention, it was me blowing the thing that let you all escape Falme*."

"Is that how you remember it?" Egwene asked.

"Sure," Mat said. "I mean, I have some holes in there, but I've pieced it mostly together."

"And the dagger?"

"That trinket? Hardly worth anyone's time." He caught himself reaching to his side, to where he had once carried it.

(* side note: yeah, his mention of this here makes me feel even more sure that he deliberately didn't tell Tuon about Egwene being captured in Falme because he didn't think it was her business. He tells Tuon things on a need-to-know basis only, from what I can see, which feels like it's reflected in the advice that he gave to Min)

26. Egwene Travels them to the top of another location (to further move away from the Deathwatch guard) and Mat takes a moment to notice the grove of trees that Rand grew on the Fields of Merrilor.

[Mat] could feel something pulling on him, tugging him northward. Rand would need him soon.

27. Mat tells Egwene that this will have to be their last stand -- they don't have the supplies for a protracted battle. She says that they just need to hold out long enough for Rand to beat TDO.

But Mat points out that if they are unable to break the Shadow's advance, then they do still lose in some pretty important ways, because the Shadowspawn will flood the lands and kill all the non-combatants. "We can't just survive... we have to win."

We get another moment of Rand tugging on Mat from Shayol Ghul while the dice tumble in his head.

Mat turned northward again. A cool, somehow familiar wind blew across him, rippling his long coat, brushing at his hat. He narrowed his eye. Rand was tugging on him.

Ugh, I feel so cheated by this. Why set this up only to give us such a disappointing conclusion to this thread, Sanderson?

Anyway, the battle starts anew. And Mat successfully avoided being dragged back to Tuon's tent, so congrats to him on that.

Okay, the next chapter is the monster (nearly 200 pages all on its own), so that will be a separate post.

#wot #wheel of time #wot reread #wot book spoilers #wot spoilers #wot amol spoilers #wot a memory of light spoilers #mat cauthon #elayne trakand #seanchan content warning #faile bashere #olver (wheel of time)#next chapter of Voice is postponed until next week #due to covid making it difficult to do the polishing on the chapter that I wanted #but my reread vibe was still strong so there will be two reread posts this week #and we are almost done!

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nemesis-is-my-middle-name · 9 months

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The discussion about the mistrust of the player character in PLA had me thinking a bit about this whole "outsider to the outsiders" thing going on.

While the player character is very innocent and not deserving of the shunning, I think people tend to interpret the betrayal as a sign that the village(of outsiders) doesn't like outsiders at all which is obviously not the case. They are literal refugees, traders, farmers, academics, etc from all around and they are very much trying to reach out and incorporate the clans into their relations. So that's not why they turn on you.

It's more of your standard rumor mill witch trial born from you falling from the sky(where the spooky rift is!) in a big showy spectacle. Then having strange clothes and an almost inhuman ease with pokemon that even the experts who have been training and studying with them cannot fathom. Now these new problems have started and the magical sky person is the only one who can fix it! Witchcraft!

YES EXACTLY!!! oooooh this ask made me so excited when i saw it in my inbox you have no idea. like, an argument can be made that the clans are isolationist, especially wrt each other (and early dialogue abt mai also suggests that jubilife and the clans are also still relatively remote but that's off topic), but by nature jubilife can't be the same way. kamado even self-describes the galaxy team as a "group of outsiders" in hisui. a security corps guard jokingly refers to them as the "Ragtag Expedition Team." so to say that they're fearful of strangers, or don't easily accept them, is clearly wrong.

not only that, but there's a list of galaxy team principles framed in the player's house, and one of them is "Those who are weaker must be helped." so like, while kamado & other people in the team tend to be rather harsh about everyone paying their due, it's really not a matter of like, disliking new people in the team, y'know? it's more about the fact that survival in hisui is difficult, and they're constantly fighting an uphill battle to sustain everyone, so there really is basically no wiggle room for anyone to not contribute whatever they're able to, which is something that's reiterated over and over in the early game. (also there's like, a considerable amount of old/older people in the village, which to my understanding is fairly unusual for this kind of project since it demands so much physical labor under trying conditions, so presumably that also contributes to the sense that everyone's jumping on this strong able-bodied young person. and also i'm curious about the reasons behind that demographic being so well-represented. this is me getting sidetracked that's just a thing i've been wondering about.)

anyway yeah. the reason ppl are distrustful of you is that you FELL OUT OF THE SKY. you have no past but some ambiguous link to the crack in reality which people already see as some kind of bad omen or worse. and then you're like, instantly all buddy-buddy with these creatures that most people not in the survey or security corps are scared shitless of, to the point of being terrified to leave the safety of the village for fear of encountering any. like that's the other thing to me is that your talent with pokemon isn't just seen as weird, to people already scared of them it would probably be actively really intimidating. especially since you don't have the credentials of prior training, like zisu and the rest of the security/survey corps do! they're just taking it on faith that you do know what you're doing. even if you're very nice and helpful, the more fearful jubilife people would probably see you as a passive threat to the village on account of all those weapons of mass destruction you're casually carrying around in your back pocket that may or may not even be under your proper control.

& then like you said, the rumor mill has its way with you, compounded by the situation with the nobles, and by the red sky event, i mean, i don't think most of the village hates you. not after you've done so many fetch quests for all of them whwjkwhk. it's just that they're quietly sort of afraid of you, which is not at all an emotion negated by how helpful you've been. and that's why you get kicked out.

#the nemesis speaks #the nemesis answers #dargonics #pla analysis #oof sorry this one got really long #you just uh. yeah. yeah!! you get it!!#like again it's not that ppl don't LIKE the protag. i think ppl like you (or if not that at least what you do for jubilife)#they just also think you're intimidating and a little scary. y'know bc of the sky hole and the weird pokemon soul bond and all.#and THAT is why kamado kicks you out and it's ultimately only the survey/security corps that give you real help #(bc they know you well enough by that point not to fall for the rumors/hearsay abt you)#kamado apologist hours

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this-acuteneurosis · 1 year

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You might have partly answered this in sole way or another (either in your fic or on Tumblr) but how would you rate Obi-Wan asa Master to Anakin? There's this Dave Filoni discourse, because in his opinion, Qui-Gon would of been a better teacher had he been the one to train Anakin. In fact he claims that Anakin would of never turned if that was the case, which I don't agree with. What's your take on this? What do you think of Obi-Wan as a Master and his relationship with Anakin? I'd love to hear you thoughts on this.💜

I'm sorry, you asked a very specific question and I have been overwhelmed at the idea that Dave Filoni thought Qui-Gon Jinn would have been a good master for Anakin, and would have prevented him from falling. Did you...did you see that man? Did you see how he never listens to people? How he ignores and dismisses Obi-Wan? How he treats Anakin??? You think Qui-Gon Jinn would have taught Anakin how to listen to other people, and not just steamroll over them with Force powers? You think they wouldn't have fought over right and wrong, and Palpatine couldn't have convinced Anakin that Qui-Gon "I do what I want" Jinn didn't take Anakin seriously??? I...I just...wow. What a different character interpretation. Did we watch the same movie? This explains so much about what I didn't like about TCW.

I think the only way I can talk about Obi-Wan as Anakin's master is to set aside the doomed to failure aspect of the meta knoweldge that Anakin would become Vader. Like, if that is true going in, literally anyone who took on Anakin would have to fail at some point, so lets assume it wasn't inevitable.

I think the opening of AoTC shows a pretty interesting and honestly good relationship between Anakin and Obi-Wan. Anakin is not 100% on board with Jedi teachings, but he's willing to talk to Obi-Wan about his struggles and feelings, and clearly cares about him. So Obi-Wan was just fine from a perspective of being a person who could love Anakin and accept him as imperfect by Jedi standards.

Anakin doesn't seem to struggle with any Force skills, so Obi-Wan was clearly a decent teacher in that respect. Anakin didn't always respect Obi-Wan as a teacher or authority, but it's unclear how much of that is just normal student/teacher tension vs Anakin having power dynamic issues vs Obi-Wan's inexperience in being a teacher and inspiring respect and emulation or obedience.

Obi-Wan's weaknesses were giving Anakin too much leeway in the long run, and not having the political and social savvy to recognize the danger of and prevent Palpatine from getting close to Anakin. Obi-Wan also failed to convince Anakin of the dangers of befriending Palpatine, which...oops. But he probably didn't think the consequences of that friendship would involve Sith levels of catastrophe.

Anyway, I don't think that Obi-Wan should have been Anakin's teacher, but my concern has always been more along the lines of Obi-Wan jumping into the position haphazardly in a moment of grief, without any previous experience, and not because he was a bad mentor or a poor fit for Anakin.

And I wouldn't say that I know who a better option would have been. You could theoretically convince me of just about anyone. I think baby Anakin would have gotten himself attached to anyone who took him in at that point. Someone who actively disliked Palpatine and knew how to make Anakin dislike him or mistrust him obviously would have been the best from a controlling the narrative perspective. I think Aayla Secura would have been an interesting choice from what I casually know about her. Saw someone suggest Kit Fisto and I thought it was fun. I love Plo Koon, maybe that would have worked. Or maybe someone completely different.

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official-kenralie-fanbase · 2 years

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Headcannons about the councils relationship with each other?

Anon I literally think about this all the time so you came to the right person

For the most part, they have decent professional relationships. For the most part, they aren't "friends" per se (though there are exceptions) but get along relatively well. They're the type of people who normally don't despise each other's presence but won't seek to spend time with one another outside of their duties.

Some of them have tried to initiate get-to-know-each-other activities (literally every single Councillors-have-a-game-night fanfiction or something like that is PURE GOLD)

They try to keep their political arguments out of their relationships with each other, but that's naturally difficult for people in such close contact with one another and they'll tend to group up with others who think the same thing.

They'll do trust exercises and deliberately try to get along with one another and trust each other, but there is still conflict, obviously.

One thing I find fascinating is the whole "try to keep up a unified front" thing. In the modern world of technology, it's so easy to see when politicians or public figures dislike each other. But the Councillors try to present a unified front, which is probably because they all run a government together.

They don't want people to know that they argue- which leads to another element of the Lost Cities that seems perfect on the outside but is anything but. These are (supposedly though we all know that's not true) the twelve most intelligent, skilled people who all have different strengths and weaknesses. Of course they're going to argue sometimes. And acting like they don't is dismantling trust in the Council.

However, they really do have strained relationships, especially with the recent events.

Councillors backstabbing each other hasn't ever really happened. The closest it came was with Fintan and the pyrokinesis incident, but they blamed that on him losing control of his fire and solved it by banning pyrokinesis and removing him from the Council. No harm done (so they say).

So when Oralie turned on the Council to give Sophie the cache, the others felt really betrayed. Not just by her, but by Bronte and Terik, who helped her.

Ever since then, they've mistrusted one another to no end

Every action has ulterior motives. Everyone is keeping secrets.

Now, this group of people who used to be just coworkers has become a group that mistrusts and lies to each other constantly. The lack of stability in the Council contributes to the lack of stability in their world.

And in the final book(s) of Keeper, I really hope we see more division in the Council. We know that Bronte, Oralie, and Terik (supposedly though I'm beginning to mistrust him) are on Sophie's side and Alina is against her. But what about the others? What do Ramira and Zarina think about the fact that she burned the Neverseen storehouse? Do Noland and Darek have an opinion about the meeting with Trix?

And the division in the Council is probably what's going to lead to the Neverseen being able to take over

Oooh! And something that's really interesting- obviously the whole rule that Councillors can't get married or have children is flawed. But the reason is so they won't put their spouse/romantic interest or child in front of their job

And... that's literally what Oralie did

She threatened the stability of the Council and thus the world by betraying the others to give something from Kenric, the man she obviously loved, to Sophie, her illegal daughter

And I find that absolutely fascinating because obviously her giving Sophie Kenric's cache is viewed as a good thing, but that's what could, in the end, lead to the Neverseen being able to take over

#stellarlune spoilers #ish #just briefly mentioned #kotlc #kotlc headcanons #kotlc analysis #kotlc council #keeper of the lost cities #kotlc theories #anonymous #thanks for the ask!#sorry this took so long #i've been chipping away at it for days #but here you go

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wyldblunt · 1 year

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4, 8, 18 and 20 for glynalan from the multiple commander asks (@likemesomesalads )

4. Did they have different responsibilities in the Pact?

yes! alan slots more into the "commander as the face of the pact," "hero of tyria" role -- something he's already perfectly geared towards due to being previously used as a recruitment poster boy for the vigil (something he eventually comes to resent). glyndwr, on the other hand, stays pretty firmly entrenched as a whispers lightbringer the whole time, does his best to stay out of the spotlight (something that falls apart pretty quickly after they take down zhaitan and only gets worse), and also is eventually heavily involved with the pale reavers, which alan isn't. basically, despite also being a commander and being heavily involved with the pact, glyn stays more in the overall role of a whispers consultant vs. alan is still very connected with the vigil but his actual activities end up leaning way more general/pact-focused.

8. Who mercy killed Trahearne?

here's the thing: nobody knows, and they won't talk about it. alan, in particular, will Not discuss it. canach and caithe, the two who went in there with them, seem to be keeping the seal of silence as well. the running theory most people seem willing to accept is that glyndwr did it -- he never liked trahearne much anyway, right? he was always kind of brusque and unpleasant towards him, is openly dismissive of the weight firstborn are meant to carry, and certainly would have less baggage about doing it than alan, the herald of the pale tree and clearly one of her favorite children --

in reality, though, when they were in there, glyndwr was the one who dug his heels in. he Despises self-sacrifice in most cases, always thinks there's another way things can be sorted out, and wouldn't stop trying to brainstorm another course of action, even when it was clear they were running out of time. alan, in the end, was the one who was willing to step up and do it, as horrifying as it was for him.

glyn initially said he would be willing to take the heat for it, but -- remember how alan's been molded into a perfect PR boy for his entire military career? he's also the one who recognized that Under No Fucking Circumstances could it be broadcast that an already mistrusted, almost universally disliked ex-nightmare pact officer made the decision to kill a firstborn (but it was for the greater good and he was being totally normal about it, we prommy). that would pretty much irreversibly blow up the pact's image. at the same time, though, alan was not feeling great about saying he did it, either. this is what led to vague memorial statements of Trahearne Bravely Sacrificed Himself, no further questions thank you -- and in the end anyone with enough information about the situation still basically thinks glyn did it, but it's at least something that can be swept aside and kept quiet. most tyrian citizens probably took the pact statements at face value and it doesn't even occur to them it happened at the hands of a pact commander.

(we do also sometimes operate on a fix-it au, where we don't have the details figured out but essentially they are both like "absolutely not. fuck this idea" and they just yank him out of there)

18. Do they share responsibility at the same time or do they hand it off as needed?

a bit of both! they delegate for the stuff where one or the other has clear expertise -- as broad strokes, glyn does all the Whispers Stuff and alan does all the Vigil Stuff -- and also glyndwr is Not to be found at any public appearances, speeches, etc. for most important plot stuff, though, they're both there going through it together.

in general, alan is easier to get ahold of, so he ends up bearing a little more of the burden overall just as a function of that. if the world is not in imminent peril it will take like two and a half weeks (OPTIMISTICALLY) to track glyndwr down and drag him out to work, so if you're not willing to do that, alan is going to be the one to pick.

20. Would they pick their co-commander/s over anyone else? Over Tyria's safety?

.....aaaaalmost. in a "everyone is dangling over lava and you can only save ONE!!!!" situation, glyndwr would always choose merrit over anyone else -- this isn't even necessarily a measure of merrit being the person he Loves most, but is equally about merrit being someone he feels he has responsibility for, too. but alan is WAY up there, being absolutely one of the closest ppl glyn has in his life (despite all the friction and ups + downs they've had). alan, though, probably would pick glyndwr over any other one person.

neither of them would choose each other over tyria, though. for both of them, the hero shit is their life's work. they both go in every day knowing the risks, and dying at work is something they're both braced for. (and also they have already died at work! together!)

EDIT: wait i just remembered. we have to specify This tyria's safety, as in Glyndwr's Specific Timeline. he would absolutely doom an alternate timeline in its entirety to save one friend or loved one from his own (and he has done this.) alan... would not do that

#ty for the ask!!!#my ocs #marina ocs #alan #glyndwr #alan/glyn #oc notebook #answers #AUGH FORGOT TO TAGl #HoT spoilers #PoF spoilers #SORRY LOL

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towardsomething · 11 months

Text

Overview

These are perspectives which will help me to heal and grow so I can really live a fulfilling life.

PROBLEMS

Loneliness

Lack of respect -

Lack of self/identity distortion - feeling like I don't know who I am, what I think, feel or believe; not knowing what I need or want

Emptiness/boredom - a lack of activities, hobbies, goals, desires, wants

BEHAVIORAL STATES OR PARTS OF SELF

Overwhelm - I feel overwhelmed by stresses and problems in life to the point that I can't handle my emotions in a healthy way

Impulsivity - I act impulsively with money, dieting, sexuality; an attempt to soothe emotions?

Detachment - avoiding problems and difficult emotions by focusing attention elsewhere

Control seeking (T) - I try to figure out and fix things by analyzing and ruminating problems, making plans; usually goes nowhere

People pleasing - social adjustment, social chameleoning, doing what I think others want; for fear of conflict, losing control or being disliked, criticized, seen as selfish

Self-deprecation -

Emotional inhibition - suppression of emotions, being cold, pretending like I don't feel

Social avoidance - avoiding people because being around them is difficult

Task avoidance/procrastination - avoiding uncomfortable and difficult tasks; can't be bothered; will do it later, etc.

BELIEFS AND THOUGHT PATTERNS

Defectiveness -

Mistrust -

Pessimism - seeing the negativity and wrong about everything, a lack in everything, a sense of hopelessness; everything is a problem

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abstractmomenta · 1 year

Text

𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐎𝐔𝐋, 𝐈𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓'𝐒 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔'𝐃 𝐂𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐈𝐓

#ABSTRACTMOMENT ⇴ independent , private , player character ( emilie breck ) of baldur's gate iii . affiliated with @b4ldurians & @ghosttsar. largely headcanon based. sideblog to @fearstouch, tormented by julian. this blog will contain triggering content in line with that of the game. this blog is not spoiler free.

𝐔𝐍𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐘 𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘 𝐎𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐎𝐃𝐘, 𝐅𝐄𝐋𝐓 𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐒 𝐀𝐒 𝐀 𝐑𝐈𝐕𝐄𝐑

IMPORTANT INFORMATION

when emilie is unsure of someone's intentions, is generally feeling mistrustful, or otherwise does not want someone to know her true name ( a habit well worn into her having baba yaga as a parton ), she introduces herself by the name of tav )

emilie is a pact of the chain warlock, her patron being baba yaga as written by b4ldurians, it strongly affects her actions and relationships with others, and is not often likely to tell people who her patron is. due to certain company she keeps, it's often believed that her patron hails from avernus, and she is not prone to making corrections unless it is relevant.

she is a tiefling, but spent her youth being passed off as a half elf. her horns were ground down to be as smooth as possible, and her hair was styled to carefully hide them, with dresses often employed to cover her tail. it's been over a century since she's been forced to hide it, but still deals with insecurities surrounding it. she does not speak about what happened to her horns unless exceedingly close to someone and asked very directly. this secret was so well hidden during her childhood that even rowena, who she grew up with, did not know her secret until they met again aboard the nautiloid. emilie now openly presents as a tiefling, but is not particularly well versed in tiefling culture having lived a largely nomadic life style since making her pact with baba yaga.

em's default romance is gale, as written by b4ldurians, and while not ship exclusive, i am more likely to default to pre-game romances than to develop them during canon or post canon. i am not wholly opposed, but chemistry is key. i am more than open to all other types of relationships as i truly adore creating dynamics.

more will be added as i both progress in the game, and as other details become relevant or when i finally make an actual page for all of this.

𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐃, 𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃

BASIC RULES & CREDITS

the basics of don't be a terrible person continue to apply, as they do with most blogs.

as previously stated, this blog is strongly interconnected with @b4ldurians & @ghosttsar so if you're only following me, you're missing a lot of the story. i typically default my dynamics with npc characters in threads such as other companions to fall in line with our discussions about how they interact, but am open to plotting otherwise.

this blog is generally very plot driven, but that does not mean i dislike any and all forms of spontaneous interaction, but you will get the best version of my writing if we've at least spoken a bit out of character to establish what we're generally going for.

this blog is a sideblog to @fearstouch, which yes, is also em, however i felt like her baldur's gate timeline was developed enough and separate enough from her main continuity it warranted its own blog. i consider us to be mutuals if you follow this blog, and receive a follow back from my main blog. i do not require you to follow my main blog.

my name is julian or jab, either is fine, and my pronouns are they/them. he/him is also okay, but i do prefer they/them. i'm nonbinary, 25+, live and work in CST, and through the halloween season will be working roughly 60 hour weeks so my activity will likely suffer from mid september through the end of october as i balance my full time job with haunt acting. you have been warned.

my templates for my header and pinned post can be found here, and my typical psd for edits is show yourself by @jaynedits , promo template can be found here.

if you have any questions, please feel free to message me, and in addition, my discord is available to all mutuals.

#general ⇴ pinned !

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teruel-a-witch · 2 years

Text

austen's emma inspired (modern) au of season 2 mcdanno

steve gets fed up with what he perceives as danny pining for rachel when she's clearly not worth it and his friend deserves better so he leaves for a few weeks of training with the navy reserves, without telling danny why he left, of course.

as the time of his homecoming nears, lori approaches danny because she thinks he would have the best intel on whether or not steve is into her. danny doesn't want to be mean but privately he scoffs at the idea because steve was so against having lori on the team and seemed to dislike/mistrust her for the longest time.

he is, however, curious of the timing of why lori is asking now, and she surprises him by saying that she used to think steve definitely wasn't interested but recent events have indicated that he might like her after all, particularly citing the hike steve recently dragged her to (as a team bonding activity) and how he carried her back in his arms when she twisted her ankle.

danny assures her it means nothing as steve has taken him on multiple hikes and he would have carried anyone who was hurt the big showy oaf he is which makes lori bristle 'i knew you had a thing for him too and you are jealous, that's why you don't want it to be true, just admit it'.

danny goes to automatically deny it, but the incident makes him think and re-evaluate things. why does the idea of steve having feelings for lori make his skin crawl? why can't he stand the thought of them flirting and happy at the office every day? that's when he's hit with the realisation that the only person steve should be with is him. danny. he didn't realize why he enjoyed steve's undivided attention and being the most important person in his life until he was faced with the possibility of someone else taking that place.

he also re-evaluates the handcuff incident and steve's strange over-reaction which now makes it seem like steve was jealous! over lori! just his luck that danny realised his feelings for steve when he's already halfway to being in love with someone else. what's worse he now has to play supportive best friend™ and encourage steve to follow his heart because he does want him to be happy.

meanwhile, steve had thought that putting the distance between himself and danny would help him get a handle on his feelings, but it just makes him miss him more, even unrelated things remind him of danny and he just longs to hear his voice and see his hands move in an intricate dance of gestures and his cheeky smile when he teases steve.

he hasn't really kept in touch but somehow through the grapevine he hears about the news that rachel and stan have decided to renew their vows (because having a baby made them feel closer to each other) and of course steve can't stay away any longer! danny needs him! he has to be there for danny to comfort him and it doesn't matter that his own heart is breaking. steve will grit his teeth and bury his pain and share danny's because that's what you do for your best friend!

he travels all night just to get to danny as soon as possible and stumbles onto him almost burning down the mcgarrett kitchen. danny seems almost shell-shocked to see him and acts a little cage-y. steve tells him he's sorry and he's here for him if he needs anything.

danny is confused 'not that i don't appreciate it, but what's the occasion'. steve gently clarifies 'it's fine, you don't have to pretend with me, i know it must be a huge blow to you that rachel is re-marrying the same guy for a second time'. it dawns on danny what has steve so distressed and he even laughs a bit because it's so far off from the actual things he's been preoccupied with, giant SEAL shaped things.

it's steve's turn to be confused, because he assumed danny's voicemail meant he's not over rachel. danny has to correct him 'babe...that voicemail was from months ago, and anyway i don't think it was even about rachel, i just wanted my family back, or the idea of it, but you can never go back. holding onto the past only makes you miss the exciting future opportunities'.

steve sees his opening, of course he wasn't going to bring up his feelings but finding out danny wasn't pining for rachel made him eager to find out his chances before it's too late. 'speaking about future opportunities...'

danny realises this is it, steve is going to tell him about his designs on lori, and he just can't, he can't handle hearing it right now, so he stops steve mid-sentence with 'please don't...it'll make things awkward at work'.

the only way for steve not to look like he's been stabbed in the gut is to completely shut down and go into SEAL mode, but not fast enough to hide the hurt on his face. 'very well. as you wish, i would leave now but it's my house' he grits out. danny turns to leave but takes one last look at steve, standing there like a beautiful, cold statue, and can't stand the thought that he did that, he will force himself to listen because he has to be a good friend to steve.

danny gingerly approaches steve and takes his hand, which makes the ice sculpture thaw a little. 'i'm sorry, i was being selfish, whatever you want to say to me i will hear it, as a friend should'.

'friend...you keep using that word...dearest danno...' steve surprises danny by bringing the hand he was holding to his lips. 'if that's all we are ever going to be, i'll be happy with it, i swear, just...you know i'm bad with words and feelings and you put up with so much of my crap and you stay and have my back the way no one else ever had, and you make me feel too much to be able to put into words...tell me one thing, just one thing...do i have a chance? say something' .

danny is too shocked to speak but he's not about to let steve feel rejected again so he just drags him into the most passionate of kisses he can muster, pleased when steve responds enthusiastically.

somewhere in his happiness- and relief- and lust-addled brain a thought lingers and he pulls away 'oh, shit, lori's gonna be devastated'. then he quickly makes steve forget his confusion because poor girl didn't need more embarrassment and danny was feeling generous.

ps. danny can't say he's sorry when lori gets transferred (he is not that generous), and nothing is going to stop him from being disgustingly happy and in love both at the office and in life. maybe that dusty old english book rachel made grace read recently wasn't as ridiculous and far-fetched as he thought. 'if I loved you less I might be able to talk about it more'

#mcdanno #mcdanno au #h50 #myh50 #this is super niche and got super long and also makes more sense if you read the book #emma #pride and prejudice in hawaii #it's my tag for all austen+mcdanno related stuff #you can also treat it as a writing prompt #i tried to model it after the confession in the book if you think it's a bit more dramatic than normal #lori is harriet obviously lol #danny is emma (he likes to meddle and matchmake) so it's more from his POV

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captainofthetidesbreath · 2 years

Note

People are also mad about fcgs new ability being shown with imogen for some reason?? People say it’s bad roleplay and that how fcg does things is poor therapy like that isn’t the whole point of his character?

just an upfront warning that this post got long

Anon, firstly, I don't know what precisely I've been complaining about that led to this being an "also" because my complaints about how historically people unfairly refuse to treat Travis as a thoughtful and deliberate player is not the same topic at all here.

Secondly, most of the complaints I've seen—both on my dash and in private—aren't that this mechanic is bad roleplaying. Most of the complains I've seen is that it feels to adversely shape the roleplaying environment at the table and force a specific dynamic, incentivize prioritizing investing in a relationship with FCG more than anyone else, and discourage maintaining friction or conflict with FCG. The complaints I'm familiar with aren't that it's bad RP or that it means Sam is RPing FCG poorly, it's felt rather that this mechanic encourages a bad environment for roleplay and creates a difficult space for specific roleplay choices that those who are not Sam may make. This is a completely different complaint.

As far as I, and others I've spoken with, understand: the mechanic is that those who are held to be a "trusted companion", that is those they have a stronger positive relationship with, have additional benefits they can receive. The complaints I'm familiar with—and, frankly, personally share—is that by creating material mechanical benefits to a relationship with FCG and having a positive relationship with them, it actively creates more incentive to roleplay with FCG and disincentivizes having a contentious or negative relationship with them. If there is a mechanical benefit conferred upon being a friend and having a positive relationship with FCG, then it is obliquely rewarding avoiding conflict with him. For example, Liam would be mechanically disadvantaged if he were to lean into Orym having more of a strained start with FCG and if he were to continue to do things that FCG does not appreciate, such as holding interventions.

It also gives Sam a lot of mechanical power over relationships at the table; a character that FCG does not like does not gain any benefits so long as FCG dislikes them. This disincentivizes conflicts with FCG, disincentivizes disagreeing with him, disincentives mistrust, etc. This creates a massive power imbalance at the table. It makes it so it is very difficult to have certain kinds of relationships with FCG, such as the ones in the early campaign between Beau and Caleb, or Fjord and Caleb, or Veth and Molly, or Beau and Molly. This also creates a situation where there is more mechanical reward for arranging scenes with FCG over other characters; it indirectly incentivizes speaking to FCG more than the others.

This is a completely different thing from disliking that FCG is intentionally played as a poor therapist. These are two different things. There's playing FCG as actually very bad at therapy, and there's actively conferring mechanical benefit to prioritizing engaging with FCG in any context instead of with other characters—the complaints I'm familiar with center on the second. Even if FCG was GOOD at therapy, the mechanical imbalance I described STILL exists and is not at all addressed by FCG being better at their job.

There is a displeasure with the possibility that this mechanic could enforce a very specific sway over the way everyone in the group interacts with FCG by imposing a mechanical benefit to reducing as much conflict with FCG or catering to FCG's preferences as possible. Yes, you can argue that is part of the roleplay and part of the consequence that FCG is bad at therapy—but many do not like the sense that players are obliquely not rewarded for choosing to prioritize other relationships at this time or for maintaining conflict in the relationship with FCG. There is a dislike to how it gives Sam so much active power about the way everyone roleplays around his character. There is a difference between a CHARACTER having greater weight and influence on all other relationships in the group and a PLAYER having greater meta-game weight. As we understand the mechanic, Sam has more power on the field than anyone else where it should be equal; this is what most complaints focus on and, this is separate from how much power and influence FCG can exercise in the group.

For the record, this is not a specific criticism of Sam as a player and person, and I don't think it will be abused at the table and I don't think it has been—I, and many others with criticism, think the mechanic ITSELF sucks at a conceptual level, and it would equally suck regardless of how thoughtfully it's used and regardless of who is playing with it.

Also, people are allowed to understand WHY a choice is being made for a character and STILL feel uncomfortable with it. "It's intentional that FCG is a bad therapist" does NOT negate people feeling uncomfortable and having their teeth set on edge about it. I am, actually, one of those people. I think it is a precise and intentional choice on Sam's part—it still drives me nuts, and I hate every single second I sit through it because it is like nails on a chalkboard to me. People can both recognize it is the point of the character AND hate that this was what was chosen to be the point of the character. These are not exclusive to one another. People can consciously acknowledge that it is intentional and the purpose and still personally hold that it was a choice they feel was bad or aggravating or distasteful or just one that doesn't appeal to their sensibilities.

#If this is about utilitycaster's post then you severely misread her thoughts on the matter bc she clearly separated mechanics and RP.#Critical Role things #CR #cr meta #long post for ts

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iricathel · 2 years

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˖🌿 ᝬ ʿ ℙ𝕖𝕣𝕤𝕠𝕟𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕪 ꜝꜞ 𖦹 ˖࣪،̲Ꮺ !

୧⍤⃝🌹𝙶𝚎𝚗𝚎𝚛𝚊𝚕

-> Zazu appears and is someone intimidating, with a strong personality, stubborn but determined and aggressive.

From a distance you can notice that dark aura that embraces the person of the Owl and his gaze, often narrowed with mistrust and repudiation, doesn't help to lighten the tension that someone can receive when meeting him face to face.

Zazu shows himself as he is without masks or concealments, he is not afraid of disliking people and receiving criticism for it due to how mean he can be, he is one of those people who always tell the truth even though it may hurt someone (and that is because of cruelty, but this character is like that. Cruel). If he doesn't like something or disgusts him, he will say it out loud as if it weren't a big deal, the same thing happens when he likes something.

Despite all this cruelty and coldness, Zazu always remains polite, sophisticated, and well mannered due to his high position. We have to understand that as a Royal Regent he can't afford to antagonize people of great power and gain a bad reputation that could put his job at risk.

He is seen as a loner because he is not interested in being surrounded by people and prefers to be locked in his office working without anyone bothering him. Although the only times where he is seen accompanied are at formal social events and accompanying the royals on their journeys to ensure that everything is in control. You can see that he is someone devoted to his work and it is one of the most important things he has in his life.

All this negativity aside, Zazu has a soft side that he hides from others so as not to get hurt and that, in order to get to see it, you have to be patiently caressing its icy heart to be able to open it like drops of water polishing a rock. Also don't consider that once this you discovered this side of him, now he will stop being a bastard with you.

୧⍤⃝🌹𝙼𝚋𝚝𝚒

-> Istj. The Logist personality type is believed to be the most common, making up around 13% of the population. Their defining characteristics of integrity, practical logic, and relentless dedication to duty make Logists a vital core for many families, as well as in organizations that uphold traditions, norms, and standards, such as law offices, regulatory bodies, and the military. People with the Logistics personality type enjoy taking responsibility for their actions, and take pride in the work they do; When working to achieve a goal, Logisticians spare no time and energy to complete every important task with precision and patience.

Logisticians do not usually make assumptions; Instead, they prefer to scan their environment, check the facts, and come up with practical courses of action. Logistics personalities do not do meaningless things and when they have made a decision they will pass on the facts necessary to achieve their goal, hoping that others will immediately understand the situation and take action. Logicians have little tolerance for procrastination, but lose patience even more quickly if their chosen path challenges them with impracticable theories, especially if they ignore key details; if challenges turn into time-consuming discussions, they can become angrily angry as deadlines approach.

୧⍤⃝🌹𝙵𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚜

-> Atychiphobia. Intense fear of failure. It may cause you to put off or avoid any activity or scenario that has the potential for an unsuccessful outcome. Someone with this condition may be scared to try new things, take risks or embrace growth for fear of failure.

-> Aphenphosphobia. An irrational fear of someone touching you is unusual in that it is not particularly linked to other anxiety-related conditions such as social phobia (social anxiety disorder) or a fear of vulnerability or intimacy. Many people with haphephobia can form warm, tight bonds with others, although they may worry that those bonds are at risk due to their inability to show physical affection.

୧⍤⃝🌹𝚂𝚔𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚜

-> Thaumaturgy. It refers to the power to perform extraordinary events such as miracles, etc. Witchcraft, sorcery and occultism are used in relation to supernatural powers born, in many cases, of superstition.

-> Hunting. The activity of hunting wild animals or game / the activity of searching for something.

-> Psychometry. Ability to relate details about the past or future condition of an object or location, usually by being in close contact with it.

-> Muay Thai. Martial art of Thai origin and a certain danger, since it uses techniques with lethal potential. Focused on direct melee contact, this discipline tends to seek a quick defeat of the opponent with strong and powerful blows. In this discipline the use of all extremities and most of the body is allowed. It is considered a type of extreme wrestling, and is illegal in some countries.

-> Iaido. Iaidō (居合道), abbreviated iai (居合), is a Japanese martial art that emphasizes being aware and capable of quickly drawing the sword and responding to sudden attacks. The purpose of iaido isn't about swordsmanship or active combat, but rather the ability to maintain a high state of awareness and quickly draw your sword in response to a threat.

#zazu suwan #diabolik lovers oc

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napoleondidthat · 3 years

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Yeah! You finally replied thanks a lot! (I am the anon who asked about Caroline) I was afraid that you didn't receive my message, since I am new to Tumblr. So yeah thanks again. I would like to also ask you to specify about your dislike towards her besides the betrayal, that would be quite interesting. The only book about her I came across on so far was Trowbridge's take on Bonaparte sisters, but it's so misogynistic and outdated so I mistrust it. That's why it would be much better to hear more examples from you! :}

I am usually NOT that late! I have every intention of not being so late again :)

Caroline just comes across as mean spirited to me. Like I said in the last posting, all of the Bonapartes were entitled assholes at different times. All believed they were owed their fair share of the riches won by Napoleon. All of them acted out at different times, or acted out against Napoleon or the Beauharnais clan. Some of it over petty vindictiveness and others times over tribal issues they saw happening.

Let's take Pauline for example. Pauline, prettiest woman in the whole world we're told, is also jealous of anyone who seems to upstage or her maybe upstage her in Napoleon's affections. So she marries Borghese, for many reasons, one being he's rich and has lots of impressive family jewels. She attends one of Napoleon's parties wearing every piece of Borghese jewelry she can to upstage Josephine. It's her jealousy out at play, but it's rather childish and immature and causes more eyerolls than anything else.

Napoleon can also be jealous and petty when it comes to family squabbles. At one point, he and Josephine attend a dinner held at Joseph's estate, Mortfontaine. Joseph decides that the family will walk into the dinning room by seniority. That means he, Joseph, being the eldest, will walk in with his mother, who he regards as "head" of the family. Julie, Joseph's wife, will walk in after, I forget who is to accompany her. Napoleon doesn't like this. At all. He thinks he should walk in first with Josephine because he is "head" of the family and also winner winner chicken dinner. So what happens? Does Napoleon stomp and throw a fit? Close. Does he immediately leave and refuse dinner? No. Does he roll his eyes and mutter "whatever"? Nope. He waits for the doors to open and then grabs Josephine and literally runs up to get into the room before anyone else.

Caroline, on the other hand, her jealousies seem to run deeper and more angrier than the others. She's smart, she's no idiot, but that is what makes her more mean spirited too. Unlike Pauline who just wants a nice life and pretty things, Caroline wants to rule and control. That makes her plot against people, not just to up them but sometimes to make their lives miserable intentionally. She actively tries to take out Josephine (she's not actively alone in this) but she's maybe one of the best players at it.

Caroline at first wasn't allowed to be a princess, due to the misogynistic rule that a woman got her position in society through her husband. Napoleon had no plans to make Murat a prince. Caroline was beside herself, especially when her sisters and even her frenemy Hortense, got the titles. One of Josephine's ladies wrote:

“As for Madame Murat she was a prey to the most violent mortification and during dinner was so little mistress of her feelings that, on hearing the Emperor address Madame Louis several times as “Princess” that she could not restrain her tears.”

Some books you may want to check out on Caroline:

I have both these books, I haven't had the chance to read them yet, because (looks at stacks and stacks of Napoleon books that I have that I need to read). But I do hope to get to them sooner than later. They are dated, both from the 70s, but I don't believe there has been any new material released on the Murats lately.

But as a sidenote on Caroline: Napoleon did claim she was the most like him in temperment and spirit.

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eryiss · 3 years

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Summary: Freed and Gajeel were total opposites in every way, only connected by the guild. When they were forced to train together under Makarov's orders, they expected antagonism and mistrust. Instead, they were given a lesson in how quickly opposition can turn to attraction. The issue: let the budding relationship simmer away, or let it explode. [Freed x Gajeel Multi-chapter]

Notes: Hi everyone. Strap in for character development, and the ridiculous lengths that are needed to cause the development. Hope you all enjoy.

Links: FFN, Ao3, Chapter List

Chapter Four - Fighting In The Moonlight

Day Three: Wednesday

When Freed woke the next day, he wasn't surprised to find he didn't suddenly like Gajeel Redfox. The last few days of pointless antagonism and ridiculous challenges didn't slip his mind, and the stalemate between them was as tenuous as it could possibly be. This was what he expected; a weak apology after an argument was hardly going to fix everything that had happened between them in such a short time, and the overwhelming dislike they held from each other. That wasn't how emotions worked, and it certainly wasn't how Freed worked as a person.

Though, the multiple blow-ups that Freed had indulged in were hardly how he acted either. Maybe Gajeel had knocked him off kilter more than he thought.

The rest of the last night had been awkward; perhaps the most awkward situation they had been in yet. At least before, they'd had their anger and resentment to focus on, but their conversation seemed to take that away. For the rest of the night, they were two men who had a lot of issues and no way to voice them, healthily or otherwise.

A few times, Freed had considered apologising. Then, he told himself that he had nothing to apologise for, and that Gajeel was the one in the wrong. That left him with a sickly feeling in his stomach, because he knew it wasn't entirely true.

Dammit. Freed wasn't particularly fond of emotional exploration, and Gajeel had somehow forced it on him.

"I know yer awake," Gajeel grumbled, voice more sleepy than angry. Freed opened his eyes slowly to see the sun in its mid-morning state - it still annoyed him slightly that Gajeel was an early riser while Freed was fond of sleeping in - and Gajeel sitting by a fire. "I made you breakfast."

With a little frown, Freed sat up as he blinked away the sleep. He had been doing all of their cooking since they had arrived, partially because Gajeel wanted to test him and partially because Gajeel clearly liked what Freed could do with fish. This was one of the aspects of the week Freed had actually liked, as cooking in multiple situations with limited resources was something he found oddly fun. Still, he wouldn't complain if Gajeel was going to take over the chore in some kind of peace offering. He looked at the breakfast offered to him and scrunched his face in confusion.

He had made toast. Had he made bread somehow? No, that was ridiculous.

"It ain't poisoned," Gajeel continued speaking. "I ain't pissed on it or anything."

"That didn't once cross my mind," Freed croaked a little as he spoke. "I was confused as to where you got the bread from."

"There's a village with a bakery half an hour's walk away, stopped by and got some supplies," Gajeel shrugged, and Freed frowned. Surely that went against the entire point of this survivalist retreat. Gajeel seemed to preempt the question. "The whole living off the forest thing was because I didn't think you could handle it. Sounds petty when I say it out loud," He chuckled. "But a mage can't stay in a hotel - I thought that's what you were doin' - so I wanted to make sure you could handle yerself. You can, so no point in eating fish again when we don't have to."

Oh, that was shockingly mature. Both the admission and the reasoning for stopping the survivalist aspects of the training. Perhaps Gajeel had more emotional maturity than Freed was giving him credit for.

Perhaps it was his time to make an effort too.

"That's reasonable," Freed agreed, taking the toast before speaking again. The next sentence he had to force out before annoyance at Gajeel filled him again. "I must admit, if we're being honest with one another, I have found your exercise to be rather genius. I'm quite impressed."

Oh, he actually meant that. That was unexpected.

"Genius?" Gajeel scoffed. "You makin' fun of me?"

"Not at all," Freed corrected, because if he actually did think Gajeel was impressive then he wasn't going to recant on his words. "The fact you've essentially made a gymnasium out of things you can find in a forest is impressive itself. It allows for the benefits of specific exercise, while also lowering the limitations. You could learn to swim in a pool, for example, but learning in a lake adds the complications of pond life, temperature, shorelines and distractions. You could weight train with barbells, but doing it with the tree trunk means you're ready to lift things that aren't meant to be lifted and will offer less support," He took another bite of the toast. "You've essentially replaced the comfort of a gym with the practical requirements of a mission environment. It's quite impressive."

"Oh, shit," Gajeel grumbled a little, and looked away. "Thanks."

"There's also your intention to push my limits," Freed saw Gajeel tense just a little. "If I were the type of man you wanted me to be, I expect this would have been torturous. So not only did you make a practical training environment, you found a way to do it while also making me uncomfortable as you could," He smirked a little. "You're smarter than you look, Gajeel."

"Can't tell if yer complementin' me or not."

"I am, if a little backhandedly," Freed commented, and Gajeel hummed a little.

They sat beside one another for a short while, and Gajeel wordlessly handed Freed a small metal mug filled with coffee. It wasn't the type of bean that Freed would have chosen for himself, but there was a certain satisfaction in the burn on his tongue. He also normally would have added some milk, but this particular roast didn't seem to need it. He would have to look into it.

When their breakfasts had been finished, neither man spoke for a few minutes more. Freed still expected Gajeel to have some sort of challenge or task ready for him as he had the previous two days. Eventually, once the quiet had begun to unnerve him, he spoke again.

"Other than the fight, what have we planned today?"

"Kinda thought that was all we needed," Gajeel shrugged, not looking towards Freed as he kicked dirt onto the fire to extinguish it. "Maybe we could go back before it gets dark? I dunno."

"Right," Freed was speaking quietly. Something was clearly wrong with Gajeel. "If you wish."

"Ain't got anything else planned," Gajeel stood as the fire burned away.

"Right," Freed repeated, disbelieving. Had he hurt Gajeel's feelings? That didn't make him particularly good. It didn't make him feel guilty, exactly, but it wasn't great. "I'd like to stay until the evening at least. Maybe returning to Magnolia at night would be good for us both; I don't typically travel at night so perhaps it will help broaden my horizons."

"If you want," Gajeel still wasn't looking at him.

"So, if we've got most of the day with nothing to do, perhaps we should go with what you planned originally," Freed suggested, and Gajeel glanced towards him for a moment. He looked away quickly. "I expect it would be equal parts humiliating and exhausting."

"Oh yeah," Gajeel chuckled a little. "You would've cried."

"Would I?" Freed challenged. "Maybe you should prove it."

"Maybe I should."

When they looked at each other again, they both wore the familiar edge of challenge in their eyes, but this time the reasoning behind it was different. Not kind, not friendly, but not hateful either. An odd middle ground, one that they could work with.

——

"On the count of three, we fight," Gajeel stated, and Freed gave a nod.

It was evening now, with the moon high in the sky and the stars illuminated the darkness. As they had for the last three days, Freed's muscles ached from a day of physical activity and a variety of challenges. Today, though, had been a little different. While the challenges were clearly designed to prey on Freed's supposed weaknesses, Gajeel approached them with an attitude almost teacherly in his helpfulness. An entirely reluctant teacher who had lost all enthusiasm for his job, but a teacher nonetheless.

They had made camouflage for themselves, which consisted of covering their exposed skin in mud and leaves. Freed suspected that if they'd done it the day before, Gajeel would have sat back and watched with Freed amusement. Instead, he showed Freed what to do, and led by example.

Next, they'd made a boat out of dead wood, originally to highlight the lack of practical skills Gajeel thought Freed had. But under Gajeel's tutelage - he'd done this many times before meeting Pantherlilly, so was proficient at it - they managed to make a working raft.

After that, Gajeel had lifted the no magic rule. He thought that, for their fight, they should know their opponent. They had taken turns showing off their magic, using it against a tree. Freed had been pleasantly surprised by the range of spells that Gajeel possessed. He had thought the man could only turn his body to iron, so to see what he was capable of was enlightening.

Honestly, it has been a good day. Maybe the other days would have been good if they hadn't been determined to hate one another.

"Three," Gajeel said, voice low. "Two. One."

They both lurched forward, Gajeel with iron crawling up his arms to replace his skin and Freed with runes spiralling down his sword. They were both fully dressed in their normal clothes - their coats had been essentially abandoned on the first day, so the extra weight was a little unfamiliar - so that they could battle in the same conditions they would in a mission environment. Now that he had a glimmer of objectivity, Freed could admit that Gajeel really had thought this out well. Tactically, he was bordering on genius.

An extended fist cast in iron shot towards Freed, and he pushed his sword to parry it. He was knocked back, but managed to stay on his feet. With a muttered spell, the runes swirling around him shot forward, plastering themselves onto Gajeel's metal skin.

The yelling of pain was cathartic, and Frees watched with a grin as Gajeel recoiled.

Still, Gajeel clearly wasn't the type to let some pain runes stop his stubbornness. He gritted his teeth and lurched forward, arm mutating into a blade of black steel. The magic used to cast the spell must have overwhelmed the pain runes, as they shattered on his skin, and Freed cussed under his breath. Dragon Slayer magic was inherently powerful, so simply plastering the man with runes until he could no longer stand wouldn't be enough.

Gajeel ran forward with his sword arm extended, and swung for Freed's gut. Freed lowered his sword to protect himself, and saw that Gajeel's sword arm wasn't as sharp as it could have been. More a baton than a blade.

How considerate.

For a while, all they could do was parry one another. Freed needed to reevaluate his strategy while Gajeel needed to build up to something more powerful. Freed was a better swordsman, and until Gajeel had enough energy to use his ranged spells, they were at a stalemate.

Metal beat against metal as they battled, cutting through the relative silence of the forest. The moonlight and the stars illuminated the battle, dancing off the nearly stilled lake they had chosen to fight beside. Were there any wildlife nearby, they had decided to scarper away, no doubt sensing the overwhelming magical energy emanating from the two fighting men.

Freed's sword met Gajeel's, and the sparks that flew made both men wince and recoil a little. They both jumped back a few steps, panting and taking a moment to recover.

"Sword ain't just a prop, huh?" Gajeel huffed. "If my skin wasn't iron, you would've got a few cuts in."

"And if you hadn't dulled your arm perhaps you might have to."

"Couldn't risk cutting yer perfect skin," Gajeel taunted, but it didn't feel as cruel as his other comments had been intended to be. "Basically all you've got, isn't it?"

"We'll see," Freed retorted.

With a sweeping motion of his sword, Freed quick-casted a perimeter of runes around them. They implanted themselves in the dirt before glowing bright and magical. Walls shot upwards and the effect took place, lifting both of them off the air as the effect of gravity lessened. Gajeel seemed taken aback, stumbling in the air that lifted him and looking for something to latch onto. He found nothing, and Freed smirked a little.

Freed cast his own wings to counteract the gravity spell. Runes now flying around him, he forced his magic outwards and sent tendrils of power towards his opponent. Normally this combination of spells would have been too taxing, but three days without had given him an excess of power.

Iron cut through his runes, and Gajeel's extended fist slammed into Freed's face in a vicious punch.

Dazed, it took him a moment to see what had happened. With his left hand, Gajeel had made multiple strands of iron and buried them into the ground, allowing himself to be anchored in place. He had pulled himself down so that he was on the ground again, albeit a little unsteady on his feet. With this stability, he was able to essentially make Freed's gravity rune useless.

A metal hand wrapped tightly around Freed's neck, and pushed him into one of the large trees in the rune perimeter. Freed gasped a little, his throat being crushed as Gajeel pushed forward. Even knowing the man would stop before seriously injuring him, Freed began to panic. A tingling of brimstone rose over his skin.

Instantly, he cast a spell. The reversal of the gravity spell, that doubled the pressure rather than halved it. They were both flung to the ground, and Gajeel's extended arm retreated to prop him up.

Both men struggled to keep themselves from collapsing, and Freed felt the magic flowing through him. Powerful and relentless, he quickly tried to utilise it. Tentacles of runic streams shot forward, all meant to hurt their target. They wrapped around Gajeel's arms, legs and neck, burning into him and making him yell in pain.

Scales formed on Freed's arm, but he didn't notice.

"Iron Dragon's Roar!" Gajeel yelled over the pain runes, and a flurry of magic filled the space between them.

The spell hit Freed like a truck. The dominating burn of powerful magic hit him, the pain tripled by the barrage of metallic shrapnel cutting away at his skin. A dragon slayer's roar was an experience that Freed had so far avoided - when he trained with Laxus, the other man refused to use the spell for fear of hurting his teammates - and the unfamiliar sensation was hellish. He was knocked off his feet, flung backwards and pinned against the wall of runes by Gajeel's magic. He knew he was yelling in pain, but couldn't hear himself.

Seeing it as his only next step, Freed cut the gravity runes entirely. For a moment he was forced back further by Gajeel's roar, and he yelled in pain as his back cracked against a fallen log. At least the change of gravity had thrown Gajeel off balance, as his roar cut through the trees, and into the sky, parting the clouds.

Brimstone. Fire. Darkness. They all coursed through Freed's veins.

He didn't notice it, though. The pain from the spell and subsequent fall was all-consuming, meaning the mutation of the skin on his right arm turning to scales went unnoticed, as did the burning in his throat.

Gajeel, apparently less affected by the fight than Freed, was on his feet and running towards Freed quickly. He had turned his arm to the sword again, and Freed could see he was grinning through red tinted eyes. Gajeel clearly thought that this fight was already finished, and Freed felt a rush of anger flow through him.

He would not lose a fight to Gajeel Redfox.

He would not lose a fight to a man who had tried to humiliate him.

He would not lose a fight to a man who had disrespected him.

He would not lose a fight to a man so inferior to him that he shouldn't be breathing the same fucking air to him!

Oh. It was too late, wasn't it.

Without control of his body, Freed raised his arm. It had been fully transformed into it's demonic counterpart, and Freed could only watch as magic crackled and formed at the end of his claw. He couldn't stop it now, it was too late for that. His attention had slipped, and Gajeel's parting of the clouds had allowed for direct moonlight to hit him, strengthening the demon inside of him enough for a minor takeover,

A beam of concentrated darkness flew from his claw, hitting Gajeel directly. The spell was an amalgam of every rune Freed had: pain, torment, trauma, paralysis, unconsciousness, poison. In a word, the spell was hell.

It hit Gajeel right in the heart, and Freed watched with wide eyes.

The ensuing scream sent a chill through him.

Gajeel flew backwards, and Freed watched as his eyes closed and he was knocked out. With heavy breaths, Freed forced his arm upwards and shot as much magic through his claw as he could. It was a foreign and horrible sensation, turning his runic magic into darkness, but he needed to do it. He was burning through all the magic that the demon had taken from him, exhausting himself to the point where the demon's influence would have to die out. The magic ripped away at him, and the claw began to shrivel.

The exhaustion hit him in waves, and his bones felt like they might break. He panted and heaved, nausea hitting him as he closed his eyes. It was only when he heard a loud, echoing splash that he forced his eyes open again.

Gajeel was in the lake, unconscious and with his energy sapped from him.

With as much energy as he could muster, Freed ran towards the lake and dove in. The cold hit him and woke him slightly, and he pushed on to swim towards where Gajeel had landed. The ripples were still breaking the surface, acting like a beacon for Freed to find him. He pushed on despite his aching arms, gritting his teeth as the creeping of brimstone ran over the back of his exposed neck.

Gajeel wasn't floating. He was sinking. Ignoring the demon fighting for his body, Freed submerged himself in the water and began to swim down. He saw Gajeel's body and quickly hooked his arms around the man's chest. He was limp, and Freed was quickly pulling him to the surface.

Dragging him to the shore was hellish. His body screamed in protest, but he kept going until they were on the rocks that bordered the lake. Freed wanted nothing more than to lie down and let his exhaustion take over, and he very

Gajeel was still unconscious.

Putting him on his back with his head tilted back slightly, Freed pinched Gajeel's nose and brought his mouth to Gajeel's. He breathed in heavily, forcing air into the man's lungs as best he could. He alternated between that and chest compressions, arms still burning as he forced his hands on the other man's chest.

Eventually, Gajeel spluttered out and spat water towards the side. He coughed and groaned, throat hoarse and eyes unblinking. Freed wanted to explain, or at least to help Gajeel further with his recovery, but felt exhaustion overtake him. He quickly wrote a rune to heat and protect them, before his eyes fluttered shut.

——

"You lost control, didn't ya?"

Gajeel's words cut through the silence of the train ride to Magnolia. From the moment Freed had woken up half an hour ago, their conversation had been limited. They had discussed if they were both healthy and uninjured (they were, more or less) and how they should get home in their exhausted state. Freed had teleported them both to the train station, and runed their carriage so Gajeel wouldn't be overly affected by his motion sickness. That had been it for conversation.

Freed had hoped to keep it that way. His relationship with Gajeel was tense enough before he attacked and nearly killed him, he now expected a verbal and perhaps physical assault from the other man now. He would have deserved it as well. But Gajeel had said nothing, as if he didn't have the energy to be angry,

"Excuse me?" Freed asked, pretending as if Gajeel wasn't entirely right.

"You didn't mean to do that spell, probably didn't mean to transform yer arm either, did ya?" Gajeel shrugged, as if the statement was both uninteresting and unimportant. When Freed said nothing, he continued. "You looked scared. Scared of yerself when you hit me with the spell, and scared for me when you resuscitated me."

"I didn't want to see you injured," Freed brushed off, Gajeel did not need to know about this. "Perfectly rational."

"If you didn't wanna injure me then you wouldn't have used the spell," Gajeel shrugged, looking at Freed as Freed looked out the window. "I deserve to know what happened, City-Boy."

Freed wanted to scoff, but perhaps Gajeel was right.

"No, I didn't intend to use the spell on you," Freed admitted, watching as the night rolled past them. "You have my apologies."

He wouldn't meet the man's eyes, because he didn't need to dammit. Gajeel had spent the last three days - well, two days, since he'd changed his mood today - tormenting Freed in whatever way he could. The entire point of this exercise had been to make Freed feel small, and pathetic; well, maybe not. He could have been crueler, and he did seem to have a flimsy reasoning behind everything he had done. Either way, Freed using a single spell on him didn't suddenly make them best friends, and it certainly wasn't enough to make Freed forget what had happened throughout the week.

Frankly, perhaps Gajeel deserved it. He might have deserved to be left in the lake!

Gods.

The realisation hit Freed with force. The attempts by his demon to possess him brought a lot of anxieties up to the surface, mainly about the possibility of losing control of his body. It was a valid concern - the demon would kill everything in its way if in control - but often made him forget about the smaller repercussions of his demon's growing power.

It wasn't just physical, the demon's effect was emotional. While it grew in power, it's cruelty infected the mood of him and everyone around him. It was why he had exploded at Gajeel so many times, and perhaps the reason Gajeel was hell-bent on making this horrid for him.

Dammit, he should have known this. He should have told Gajeel that this might happen!

"I can almost hear ya thinkin'," Gajeel commented. "And I know I ain't been fair in ya, but I don't think yer some kid without restraint. So you wanna explain what happened?"

Maybe he did owe Gajeel that.

It was comical really. Now he knew his demon was to blame for his foul mood, he suddenly saw how ridiculous it all was. Gods, how hadn't he realised it before.

"My demonic take-over isn't exactly like that of the Strauss'," Freed sighed, looking towards Gajeel again. "Rather than being born with a demonic alter-ego, like Mirajane, I have a living demon inside of my soul. Technically speaking, I'm being possessed at all times, I simply have the right magic to stop it from taking over."

"Oh," Gajeel grunted, because he clearly couldn't think of anything else to say. Freed expected that, most people didn't know how to react when they were told a demon could overthrow the man next to them. "Shit."

"It is," Freed agreed. "Typically it isn't an issue. It gets stronger around the full moon, and around the shortest day of the year. When they happen to coincide, it's power grows and incidents like that happen. I should have warned you, I'm sorry."

Gajeel didn't say anything. He looked Freed up and down, clearly worried. Freed understood that.

"It won't happen again," He assured, though it wasn't exactly a promise he could keep,

"You really got a demon living in you?" He asked, and Freed nodded slightly. "How the hell did that happen?" They weren't there yet. Freed tensed a little, and Gajeel seemed to know that was a limit not to push. "You gonna be okay to keep going with this? I know I was trying to push you around but if we need to call it in, I don't think Makarov's gonna be too bothered."

"It should be fine," Freed said firmly. "It only happened tonight because I lost concentration. I won't allow that to happen again."

He wouldn't. The demon was not going to control him, nor his life.

"Well, now I know what to do if it happens again," Gajeel said, and he was smirking now. Not a condescending one, nor particularly cocky. It was to break the tension. "So if yer voice gets all creepy and yer eye all glowing, I'll knock yer ass right out before y' can blink."

"You have my eternal thanks," Freed drolled.

"These runes are fucking amazing y'know," Gajeel turned the conversation away. "Ya think you'd be able to teach the bookworm how to cast 'em. Don't think I'm gonna get on a train without 'em anymore. Finally understand why people find it relaxing."

"I don't expect so," Freed chuckled a little. "They're more complex than you'd think. Levy might not be prepared for a spell like it just yet."

"Say that to her and I think she'd hit ya," Gajeel laughed. "But if that's the case, then I might have to kidnap ya for my next mission. Ain't a problem right?"

"Well, if you're being so kind as to offer to knock me out, then I suppose I owe you," Freed smiled a little.

"Damn right ya do," Gajeel grinned right at him, sharp teeth so clearly visible. "Especially after the fun couple days we just had."

For the first time, the two men shared a laugh together.

#Gajeed #Freedjeel #Freed x Gajeel #Freed Justine #Gajeel Redfox #Fairy Tail #Fanfic #Writing #Canon Divergent #Multi Chapter #Chapter Four #Word Count: 4.4k

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yourrealitybeyondtime · 5 years

Text

My OC Descriptions!

Thank you so much for your positive responses, @dasjansel @corvid-moon @teeny-weeny-ducklings @technoxslayer360 @incoherentmoose and @cake-and-roses ! Since you guys asked, I made overall descriptions of my OCs and a bit of a synopsis. Sorry it's so long! I hope you enjoy it and please provide feedback!

This is a story that takes the "chosen ones" and fantasy tropes and turns them on their heads. The main character never accepts his role. The guy doesn't get the girl. There's no prophecy or guide. The populace thinks they're monsters, not heros. Their powers are explained scientifically. They have to help themselves emotionally so they can help others physically. It's just a bunch of young adults with problems getting into shenanigans, figuring out life's lessons, and maybe saving the world.

Name: Adrian

Age: 18

Height: 5'8"

Gender Identity: Male

Pronouns: He/Him

Sexuality: Bisexual (Feminine leaning)

Race: Human

Ethnicity: German/Portugese

Neurodivergent: Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Active Power: Super strength

Passive Power: Truth (Ability to see through illusions, understands foreign languages, can tell when someone is lying, etc)

Activating Emotion: Courage

Associated Color: Yellow/Gold

Associated Element: Air/Wind

Description: This rich, all-American, high school boy has had a near perfect life growing up until a burglar breaks in his home. Thankfully, he stops the villain… by tackling him through an oak door! First hailed as a hero, his social life then gets thrown into disarray as this new found strength that seems to randomly come and go ends up earning him the reputation of a destructive menace. On top of that, he starts passing out and having "visions." Doctors say he's having seizures, but these visions feel more real than his life ever has, and it's always of the same place, a magic lab where he's the experiment! His visions keep getting worse until one day he fully wakes up in the lab and escapes, but now he can't go back home!

Adrian finds out he's stuck in the world of Mythos, the parallel Earth where all of our fantastical dreams come from, and he's not happy about it! And the locals don't seem happy about him either. Just wanting to get this over with and go home, Adrian faces more ugly reality in this fantasy world than he ever did in his privileged life in our world. With no guides or prophecies and regarded as a monster, Adrian has to figure out how to find others like himself to help him save the world and go back home.

Adrian is the self-proclaimed leader of the group. He's obnoxious, self-centered, and stubborn, and completely uninterested in helping unless it benefits him somehow. You are supposed to dislike him at first. He matures and becomes much more open-minded and accepting through the journey.

Initial Motivation: To get back home

Journey: Breaking out of your bubble is more important than staying in it, others suffer in a way different from you, you cannot speak for others, use privilege to help those that don't have privilege, attraction to anyone who shows femininity or doing female-assigned tasks/behaviors (being kind, showing emotions, being vulnerable) does not make you less of a man, the greatest strength is facing the truth

Name: Iola

Age: 20

Height: 6'2"

Gender Identity: Female

Pronouns: She/Her

Sexuality: Lesbian

Race: Human

Ethnicity: Afro-Columbian

Neurodivergent: Anxiety

Active Power: Shield

Passive Power: Acceleration/Regeneration (Subconsciously heals others, requires focus if needs boost in power, ie, if someone is bleeding out. Can cause things to grow, but also age. Cannot remove poisons/curses, cannot bring people back to life, conditional)

Activating Emotion: Care

Associated Color: Pink/Orange

Associated Element: Earth/Wood

Description: Iola's life had been pretty quiet since she and her dad started a farm out in the wilderness, until a strange boy pops up who brings a whole lot of unwanted attention. She stumbles upon her own powers as she defends her home, and then sets out to find others with Adrian.

Iola is the mom of the group, both the good parts and the bad. She is kind and caring and helpful and also stressed af and sometimes pokes her nose where she's not welcome. It's suggested at first that she may be the Adrian's love interest, but, surprise! She only likes girls. She seems to have lost someone precious to her, and it's not her mom.

Initial Motivation: Believes in following destiny

Journey: Self-sacrifice is not always necessary, mediation is more important than appeasement, give without expectation of return, worthy of just existing, important to take care of self in order to take care of others, rest is a type of work and just as important as being active

Name: Emlyn

Age: 21

Height: 6'0"

Gender Identity: Androgynous

Pronouns: He/Him

Sexuality: Pansexual

Race: Human

Ethnicity: Northern Irish

Neurodivergent: Complex PTSD, Depression

Active Power: Chemical Reaction (Interaction of two or more substances that results in different substances. Can only initiate reaction, cannot control the outcome. Usually uses fire as a weapon, but can use others. Can also stop reaction in process, but cannot reverse.)

Passive Power: Psychic (Ability to sense when others are nearby, can receive symbolic messages through dreams, not prophetic)

Activating Emotion: Passion

Associated Color: Deep blood red

Associated Element: Fire

Description: Emlyn finally seems to have found a home at the inn he works at when two strangers pop up with trouble following them. He unleashes his powers to defend them, but his loved ones reject him when his secret is exposed. With nowhere else to go, he tags along with Adrian and Iola, the only people who seem to accept him how he is. However, he harbors a terrible secret that he's hellbent on taking to the grave, and it creates a division between himself and the others.

Emlyn is very quiet and reclusive. He doesn't talk much, and seems to be insistent on covering as much skin as possible at all times. He's not the angry or brooding type, but surprisingly polite and soft spoken. And surprisingly strong. However, he seems like he'll do anything to avoid using his powers, and almost seems scared of them. Adrian bullies him frequently, threatened by the fact that he's attracted to Emlyn. Emlyn doesn't seem to care, but eventually lashes out, showing a very different, vicious side.

Initial Motivation: Redemption

Journey: The past is the past, use mistakes to learn and teach, secrets create unnecessary burden, it's okay to have darkness, do not let negative emotions rule over logical decisions, take both capabilities and lack of into account, sometimes you just can't do what you want even if others can, you are not damned

Name: Liesel

Age: 82

Height: 5'0"

Gender Identity: Genderfluid

Pronouns: She/Her, He/Him, They/Them

Sexuality: Abrosexual

Race: Fairy/Changeling

Ethnicity: Jewish

Neurodivergent: Autistic

Active Power: Freedom (Ability to unlock anything, create doors/portals with conditions)

Passive Power: Choice (Can tell what someone has decided before they act on it, very useful in combat; can see what future "paths" can be taken but cannot tell outcomes)

Activating Emotion: Hope

Associated Color: Sky blue

Associated Element: Water

Description: Liesel has had to protect her people for decades, so she's more than a bit reluctant to leave with some humans to go on some adventure. When she realizes that she needs to, she goes with them, but completely mistrusts them.

Where Iola and Emlyn are more passive, Liesel is even more aggressive than Adrian. She challenges everything Adrian knows and really gets him to start looking at things differently. They develop a weird rivalry dynamic and eventually soften up with each other.

Initial Motivation: Protect her people

Journey: Evil does not originate from the same place, no group of people are all the same, there's a difference between honesty and being cruel

Name: Uri

Age: ??? (They tell a different number every time they're asked)

Height: 5'4"

Gender Identity: Agender

Pronouns: They/Them

Sexuality: Asexual

Race: Dragon

Ethnicity: Nigerian

Neurodivergent: N/A

Active Power: Light Manipulation (Can be used to make self or others invisible, create illusions, blind someone, etc. Does not actually makes things disappear/materialize, just makes it look like it.)

Passive Power: Compulsion (Redirects electrical impulses between neurons. Makes people think certain things, somewhat like intrusive thoughts. The more impulsive someone is, the easier they are to manipulate. Often accidentally shares own thoughts with others. Usually uses for persuasion among foes and to pull pranks among friends. Cannot read minds.)

Activating Emotion: Elation

Associated Color: Emerald green

Associated Element: Metal

Other: Disabled/Born without wings

Description: Uri's just minding their own business, napping on top of their treasure trove when some adventurers break in. Those same adventurers open that weird lock contraption they've been trying to open for the last two centuries. Interesting. Rather than confronting the adventurers, Uri decides to join them in hopes of making sure their treasure doesn't get destroyed, to find some more, and to enjoy some chaos along the way.

Uri is confident, charasmatic, and devilishly handsome. They only care about their treasure, but slowly finds themself caring about the others.

Initial Motivation: To protect their treasure

Journey: Self-preservation includes helping others, happiness is worth going the long way for, people have different paths to the same goal and that's okay

Name: Oriana

Age: 19

Height: 5'6"

Gender Identity: Demigirl

Pronouns: She/Her

Sexuality: Pansexual

Race: Human?

Ethnicity: Cherokee

Neurodivergent: ADHD

Active Power: Sonic/Song

Passive Power: Empath (Ability to sense motives, can literally share emotions when making physical contact, can transfer powers between people)

Activating Emotion: Love (Both romantic and platonic)

Associated Color: White/Purple

Associated Element: Spirit/Aether

Other: Intersex

Description: Oriana has been waiting at the edge of the Ancient Forest for a long time. She doesn't remember why, but she knows she needs to guide five adventurers through the massive forest that covers half the world. For some reason, she's the only one who can survive traversing it.

Oriana is sweet and kind and too naive for her own good, having never been exposed to civilization or other people before. She seems to have a mind of a child, but has the wisdom and understanding of someone who has been alive for a very long time. Emlyn develops a crush on her due to her friendly and accepting nature and eventually confides in her. Their past is far more intertwined than either of them remember, and is the answer to why this is all happening.

Initial Motivation: Because she was asked to

Journey: Evil lives in everyone, purity is non-existent, be kind to those who "don't deserve it" without allowing self to be walked on, different facets of love

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