#they're not exactly ninja...

[that1valiantcougar]

Chakra beast Naruto and Kakashi :)

Kakashi is obviously inspired by Okami. I have a lot to ponder about regarding the AU, hmmm....

[helpmyinterestsareverywhere]

Whenever I pick up a Lloyd LEGO set and see a blue figure included I like to try and ignore it and play a game of "is it gonna be Jay or Nya?" and not find out until I get to build it

(It's a win-win situation everytime - i love them both <3)

[bambiraptorx]

If you don't mind me asking before the vote is over; could I hear about it separated au? Since I'm pretty sure that the draxum raised the turtles au is going to win.

-🔮🕸

Sure! It was originally intended to just be silly and nonsensical, so I picked some characters that the boys don't end up with much. Raph and Leo are the most developed so far.

Raph: ends up with Huginn and Muninn's extended family, and is raised as a gargoyle for the first half of his life. At some point the gargoyle warren decides that he would be better off getting more involved in yokai culture (lots of reasons involved), so they asked Huginn and Muninn to take care of him. They brought him to Draxum's lab to take care of him (may or may not have informed Draxum of this arrangement) and Draxum was like "wha--is that one of my turtles?!" and the goyles are like "uh idk boss" and he's like "that is one of my turtles I am involving myself in raising the kid."

So long story short Raph ends up with three primary caretakers plus a massive extended family that he visits on the weekends. Also he ends up with the name Red, because gargoyles have a collectively strange sense of humor and also they don't get real names until adulthood anyway.

Leo: ends up with Capitan Piel. Piel and his crew didn't realize Leo wasn't just an animal at first (to be fair they don't see that many regular turtles) so for the first year or two they keep him as a pet. Once he starts talking, they kinda collectively go "oh crap this is a child" and the crew has to decide whether they want to keep a kid or not, given their dangerous and less than legal lifestyle. They keep him and raise him as a pirate lol. (They might also name him Leon, I haven't decided yet.)

However, Leo's presence does cause Piel and Hueso to reconcile somewhat, mainly because Piel wants to make sure that his kid has a safe place to go if something happens to the rest of the crew. Leo has ended up at his uncles' several times, the longest being a period of about five months. That was also the first time he stayed at Hueso's.

Donnie: Ends up with the Librarian. Being raised in a library has some interesting effects: he's virtually a walking encyclopedia and never speaks above a whisper. He prefers to communicate using one of the many yokai sign languages he's learned, and always has a hush bat or two following him to keep an eye on him. His ability to build his tech has been somewhat limited by needing to be quiet, but he's found workarounds.

Mikey: Stays with Splinter. Rather than becoming more neglectful, Splinter is immensely overprotective of his remaining child. They still live in the sewers, just not in the same place as in the show--it's too big for the two of them. Mikey knows about the Upper City (He and April explore together because Splinter won't let him go alone) but he doesn't know about the other one. Also, he wears dresses in this au. idk why he just does.

[rainbow-flavoured-skittles]

I have found your ninjago but they have no morals au and I just love the idea

I was wondering in what ways this would affect the seasons but specific seasons I've wondered about is sons of Garmadon and hunted and how Nya would react to the other ninja and Wu being thought of as dead and how the Ice emperor would go in this au

Thank you for answering

Nya does not take it well. that's a simple way of putting it. after the Bounty gets destroyed she is out for blood and ready to kill Garmadon with her bare hands. she almost doesn't bother with the resistance because to her, her entire family is gone except for Lloyd. the only reason she did help instead of going on a suicide mission was because Lloyd begged her to, and even then it's very begrudging. Lloyd himself is a lot less sulky than in canon, since he's got Nya to keep under control and a resistance to lead, but he's also considering just killing Garmadon. all in all, not fun for them. the ninja and Wu who are in the First Realm get along pretty much like in canon

the Ice Emperor arc is an awful lot more bloody than the canon version. this Zane is already willing to commit murder (though normally for the greater good) so when he's been memory wiped and manipulated there's a lot more deaths. quite a few of the formlings are dead instead of just frozen. and when he gets his memories back, Vex dies immediately. I haven't watched s11 in a while, but I vaguely remember Vex trying to kill Lloyd, so as soon as Zane realises that Vex gets his head chopped off

and another fun tidbit: like I said before, Lloyd is very much the one keeping deaths to a minimum and the ninja under control. but he was also partially raised by them, so even his morals are a bit blurred. he's got no qualms against mild torture or breaking bones

[unsuperingyournatural]

looks like a win to me

Pedro Pascal x Actress!Reader

fluff

dividers @saradika-graphics

The soundstage hums with quiet busyness—grips moving equipment, lighting techs adjusting panels overhead, and wardrobe rushing a last-minute costume fix across the floor.

You and Pedro, however, are doing exactly nothing.

Or rather—you're doing nothing useful. You're curled into Pedro's side on a pair of canvas director chairs, your legs draped over his lap like it's your natural state of being, while Pedro scrolls aimlessly through his phone.

His free hand strokes absent-mindedly up and down your side, the soft brush of his fingers through the material of your hoodie a lazy, comforting rhythm. It sends little sparks across your skin even though he's barely paying attention—his focus glued to whatever absurdity he's found on Instagram.

You tilt your head slightly, watching him over the tops of his glasses as they slide down his nose, catching every tiny, adorable change in his expression.

The faint scrunch of his eyebrows when he reads something weird. The tiny huff of a laugh when he finds something funny. The way his mouth tugs into these almost involuntary little smiles.

It's ridiculous how badly you want to kiss him for doing nothing at all.

You shift a little closer, lowering your voice so no one else can hear. "I really wanna kiss you right now," you murmur.

Pedro's thumb freezes mid-scroll.

Slowly, he turns his head, a boyish, knowing grin already forming at the edges of his mouth before he even properly looks at you. "Oh yeah?" he says, voice warm, teasing, that easy mischief shining behind his glasses.

You nod, utterly shameless. "Mhm."

"What's stoppin' you?" he murmurs, tilting toward you slightly, the arm around your waist tightening just a little. His grin is pure trouble, but there's a softness under it—like he's already a little undone just by the idea.

You lift your eyebrows and gesture meaningfully to the crew bustling around you. "Maybe the fact that we're not exactly in private?"

Pedro huffs a laugh, warm breath fanning across your cheek as he leans even closer, almost brushing his nose against yours. "They're busy," he says lightly, voice dipped in mischief. "We’re invisible. Ninjas. Plus, you look kiss-starved. I'm trying to help."

You squint at him, feigning deep suspicion. "You're a terrible influence."

"You say that like it's a bad thing," he teases, tipping his forehead briefly against yours. "C'mon. Quick one. Right here. I dare you."

You giggle, shoving gently at his chest with one hand, though you don't actually push him away. He's just so there, warm and teasing and wearing that stupidly soft hoodie you love, glasses slipping down his nose—

"Jesus Christ, look at 'em," Jensen's voice cuts in, dry and gruff, but unmistakably amused.

You both jerk back instinctively, laughing as you turn to find Jensen standing a few feet away, arms crossed, shaking his head like he's witnessing a public indecency.

"This," he announces, addressing a cluster of PAs as if delivering important news, "is what we're up against. No self-control. Negative productivity. Someone get a hose."

Pedro flashes him a dazzling smile, absolutely no shame in sight. You hide your face against Pedro's shoulder, laughing so hard your sides hurt.

"Jealousy's an ugly color on you, Ackles," Pedro calls out, voice light, a wicked little glint in his eye.

"I'm not jealous," Jensen fires back immediately, smirking. "I'm concerned. And mildly nauseated. Pretty sure I need eye drops."

That earns a ripple of laughter from the crew.

You lift your head just enough to catch Pedro's grin—lazy, crooked, impossibly fond—and without thinking, you press a kiss to his cheek, quick and soft.

The entire crew erupts in good-natured groans and wolf whistles.

Pedro only chuckles, adjusting his arm to pull you closer like he has no plans of letting you go anytime soon. You settle back against him, your hand finding his again easily, twining your fingers together.

Let Jensen roll his eyes and the crew make their jokes. You wouldn't trade this for anything.

A little later, Jensen who is still lingering nearby, raises his voice just enough to make sure you both hear him. "Five bucks says you two can't go five minutes without touching each other."

A few crew members immediately start laughing, some even pulling out their phones to set timers like this is the best entertainment they're gonna get all day.

Pedro lifts his head lazily, smirking over at Jensen. "Five minutes? That's insulting," he says, mock-offended. "You wound me, man."

"You wound me," Jensen mutters. "With your excessive cuddle agenda."

You stifle a snort against Pedro's shoulder. "I mean..." you mutter under your breath, enough that a few nearby catch it and crack up.

"All right, fine," Pedro grumbles, holding up both hands like he's surrendering. "Five minutes. No touching. Bring it."

He carefully detangles himself from you—moving your legs off his lap, dropping his arm from your waist, leaning back in the chair like he's totally unbothered.

For about thirty seconds.

You both sit there, pretending everything is normal. Pedro tries to focus on his phone again. You pick at a loose thread on your sleeve. Someone coughs pointedly. A timer beeps once.

You sneak a glance at Pedro—and catch him already staring at you over the rim of his glasses, smirking. The second your eyes meet, he cracks first—leaning sideways to bump his shoulder deliberately against yours.

"Oops," he says, completely deadpan. "Guess I lose."

The crew roars with laughter as Jensen throws his arms up. "I knew it!" he crows, pointing at you both. "Absolutely hopeless. Un-coachable. Can't even run drills."

Pedro just shrugs, tugging you back into his side like it was inevitable. "Yeah, well," he murmurs near your ear, voice softer now, "worth it."

You smile into him, your heart feeling so ridiculously full you're not sure how you're supposed to film anything after this.

Not that you're in any rush to move.

A PA walking by slows just long enough to throw a look at you two, then smirks. "Bet you five bucks he knows her coffee order and her hangover cure."

Pedro doesn't miss a beat. "Cold brew with oat milk, extra ice. And a greasy egg sandwich with hot sauce, plus Gatorade—blue, not red."

Then, with a straight face: "And she once cried during a Shrek rewatch, so don't let her pretend she's tough."

You gasp, scandalized. "That was one time!"

Pedro just smiles smugly. "You sobbed when Donkey sang. There were witnesses."

You burst into laughter, covering your face as the crew around you loses it. Jensen groans like he's just been personally attacked. "Oh my god, make it stop. I'm gonna need therapy after this." He clutches his water bottle dramatically to his chest.

Then he adds, deadpan: "And if anyone brings a boombox and plays ‘Accidentally in Love,’ I’m walking."

The PA, already walking away, calls over her shoulder, "See? Told you. Pay up."

Pedro presses a kiss to your temple like he just won a bet himself. You're still giggling, shaking your head, eyes bright, cheeks warm.

And yeah, maybe you did cry during Shrek. But you also got Pedro to admit he's memorized your coffee order, your hangover routine, and your emotional weak spots.

Which, honestly? Feels like a win.

[rat-beastard43]

AGERE SOOS!!

BECAUSE I CANT HANDLE HOW YALL HAVE IGNORED MY BOY

And headcannons because mwah I love you 💕

I feel like he'd just describe his regression as "having some kid time"

Okay so no set age range, he's just a kid! Sometimes he's younger than others but he's fairly self sufficient.

But that doesn't mean he doesn't want to be babied!! And his regression is absolutely triggered (positively) by important people doting on him.

Grandma made cookies? "Sweet!! Thanks granny :)" Stan nodded approvingly at a repair he did? An almost silent "yuss"

He absolutely made a copy of Stan's hat out of paper and got really sad when the marker he used made the paper wet and thin so it didn't stay up right, but then he got the idea to use red construction paper and oh yeah it's coming together now!!

He's got one of those pens with a bunch of colours and uses it to doodle little ninja dudes on sticky notes, they're all cutting fruit and he leaves the sticky notes everywhere.

Also it's fun to take apart and put back together as a fidget.

"hey dudes I found this pen with like- nine different colors. I could draw so many fruit ninjas with this- like apples or strawberries or.. hey I need to look up more fruits!"

His regression isn't very noticeable if that makes sense? Like he's just so openly regressed like half the time that no one bats an eye when he does something childish because 'thats just how Soos is'

He's got a favorite cup and it's an off brand snack cup that has the spot for your snacks built into the lid. Stan bought a bunch for the store with the mystery shack logo and one had a defect so he let Soos keep it

He uses it basically every day, all the time, everywhere. "It's just so convenient!!"

Throughout the series (or I guess as summer progresses) Stan gets closer with Soos and I think this plays into Soos's regression in a positive way. Stan doesn't exactly become his caregiver but he watches for Soos, makes sure he's doing okay and draws with him from time to time.

(⁠人 ꈍ⁠ᴗ⁠ꈍ⁠)⁠｡⁠*ﾟ���

The board was made using PicsArt! None of the art was mine it was all found on the app!

Side note, for anyone curious, I'm still not really back from my hiatus. I'm trying to front more, I really am. Dennys is still the host for now- I was just supposed to front for a little bit and then I saw that Gravity Falls was kicking again on Tumblr so I had to make this. Have a great day/night!! -Ghostly

Tags!!! Aaa!! I have a taglist now I guess :D

@nottapossum @grauntiemotersblog

[yanderelegoninjago]

How They React to You Crying

Summary: The ninjas [and Nya] find you after having watched your father sacrifice his life to protect you. They had never seen you like this and they couldn't bare it

Lloyd Garmadon

He's not good with comforting

He just kind of stands there awkwardly

He knows what it's like to lose a parent, so he can sympathize with you

It hurts him to see you so upset, but he's unsure what to say or do

He tries, but...

It's just a struggle for him, but he will listen if you want to talk about it

He just wished he knew exactly what to say

He wants you to be happy and wishes he could bring it to you

But he also knows grief is a cruel mistress

Just know if you need something, just tell him

Zane Julien

He doesn't understand why you're crying? You've never cried before

Besides, you and your father never got along

It's very confusing for him. He wished he could understand your human feelings

He'll listen, but gives you tactical advice, not really advice you want

He's not really someone you want to talk to

You're just feeling intense emotions and he doesn't help

Jay Walker

He's an emotional guy- He's crying with you

He's not sure why you're crying, but he's crying because you're crying

He feels things very intensely and since he's never seen you cry it's an even more intense rollercoaster

You can tell him and he'll understand

1000000000% an empath

Is comforting you like no tomorrow. He makes you feel very special in such a damning time

Cole Brookstone

He knows what it's like to lose a parent, especially one you're so close too

He understands your pain and emotions before you do

He knows the cycle you're going through [The process of grief] and is ready to handle each curveball

He doesn't get angry with you, no matter how angry you get

He's there for you, because he knows that even if he can't make you happy, he can still be there

And that's the best thing you can ask for

Kai Smith

He's a big brother, so he comforts you like he would his sister

Though, when he does, it can be a double edged sword, because it can come off patronizing and upset you

You don't want to be treated like his sister

You both get into a fight and he just makes you angrier

He has to talk to Nya for her to set him straight

He'll apologize with flowers and such, begging for you to let him in

He wants to help you, he really does, he's just not good at it

Nya Smith

She's strange. She's kind of confused. She didn't see your father die and doesn't know why you're losing your mind

Once she does find out, she's incredibly sympathetic. She's there for you. Makes you comfort food and drinks and is holding you close as you cry

She doesn't care if you get snot or tears on her shirt. It's just a shirt

She hums to you, hoping to help you sleep, because you've cried so much that your eyes are puffy and you've made yourself sick

She tries everything to help you with the grieving process. She even makes sure the others are on their best behaviors

If they're not.... She'll handle it, be sure of that

[brucewaynehater101]

Hear me out for something. So we agree that Tim definitely took a bunch of Ras ninjas when he blew up the place right? And they're *super* loyal to him and also very, very competent.

What if when Tim brings Bruce back from the Time Stream, once Bruce is healed up, he insists on taking over WE from Tim. Not because Tim is bad at it, but because he doesn't want to sit around doing nothing while he physically heals and isn't allowed to be Batman.

So Tim decides to use the money he made to revive Drake Industries. He'll need a bunch of very loyal workers who know how math works to fill out upper management to make sure there isn't any corruption and wouldn't you know it. He has a couple hundred of exactly what he needs stolen from ras who are getting antsy about not having anything to do.

It only takes a year, maybe two at the most, for Drake Industries to raise to rivaling Wayne Enterprises and Lex Corp like it used to before Tim's parents died. There are rumors though, that it's impossible to rise beyond a certain point in the company as all those positions are filled already and if a new one opens, it's given to someone that no one has ever heard of before (more defectors from Ras). All the people on the board are weirdly young (is that Olympic Gold Winner Cissie King Jones???) And one of them just had a big scandal go public about being Lex Luthor's illegitimate son that he kicked out for being gay?? This is not at all what happened with Kon, and Lex has been trying to calm the rumor mill around it but the gossip collums have taken this and ran with it.

You would think that with a board of directors so young and a company so new that's so big, corporate espionage on them would be *easy* but that's to the fact that every single member of upper management would die for Tim, none of it happens. His company is massive and air tight. People who try to bribe his workers into selling secrets often end up in strange accidents. After all, you can take the person out of the Ninja Death Cult, but you can't take the Ninja Death Cult out of the person.

Yes! There is a series not quite like this, but dear to me. "Where Bats and Birds Roost" by Mouse_in_this_house has BAMF Tim Drake with ex-LoA agent spy network that he hides via the Neon Knights initiative.

However, I love that your AU had Tim make it from the corpse of his parents' company. Instead of using Bruce's resources, Tim used the ones that only belong to him. I also like his rehabilitation plans for all the defectors and their loyalty to him because of it.

Tim should go around snatching up people from his enemies because he has better benefits, way less chance of the job killing its employees, and charisma. Maybe Bruce gets a little annoyed cause WE employees also prefer to work at Drake Industries (probably not, but it would be funny).

Also, YJ working for DI? Brilliant ^^

This type of chaos and the BAMF Tim are spices I need more of. Let Tim use his whacky ability to befriend his enemies for his benefit!

[tentenarchive]

In Defense of Tenten - the Chunin Exams' Written Test and Her Mirrors

A common joke made about Tenten is how obvious her mirror and line contraption, used to share answers with Rock Lee during the written exam, is. In this post, I'll show how her solution is perfectly reasonable and why she wasn't disqualified by the ninja proctors.

Firstly, we have to stablish what the objective of this written test is: to cheat. The written test was designed to be too difficult for ninjas of their level to be able to answer, forcing them to cheat from each other. Such is stated by Ibiki in the end of the First Phase chapters:

Next, the proctors are all higher level shinobi, better prepared and used to seeing various tricks and jutsu. It's not an stretch to suppose they're aware of EVERY cheating attempt made by those Genin, but were responsible for judging if their technique is too sloppy, obvious or ineffective.

My theory is supported by this scene, where Izumo eliminates one of the ninjas doing the test, claiming he took "five strikes".

It implies the competitors are allowed five errors before being disqualified, and one of the eliminated Genin makes it clear to the reader the "five strikes" are five times being caught cheating.

Naruto is also implied to be caught almost cheating when Hinata offers him her test answers (it can be interpreted either as Naruto being closely watched or Naruto's nerves making him think like that, half the proctors' job is to scare the Genin) and even then he is not automatically removed.

Tenten's technique may be obvious for us, as readers who have been shown by the author himself how she did it, but it's a single and successful attempt, and it's not commentated by any other characters, meaning no one caught on her besides the proctors, and they would only disqualify her if she did it more than once (which wasn't needed, she found the mole with all the answers!).

A pettier criticism i've "how isn't anyone seeing the lines?" to which the answer is very simple: manga is a visual media and the author needed the audience to understand how she was manipulating the mirror. If you take in consideration Tenten's fight with Temari in the anime - which is filler, btw, and it's up to you reading this to decide if it's a fair assessment on their abilities or not - she's shown using invisible lines to manipulate her weapons after throwing them. The lines are, conveniently, only visible when the animation needs us to understand how the weapons are moving backwards. Any other frame they're invisible.

You can see in the panel how the lines fade out towards the bottom and only show where they're attached to the mirror.

Finally: that's exactly what Ibiki expected the genin to do. There have been a few posts, specially on twitter, asking "how are you supposed to pass if you don't have a kekken genkai??". Like Tenten. That's how.

Kankuro and Tenten are the only characters which Kishimoto showed us cheating that didn't use an exclusive DNA super power. Kankuro and Tenten both use hidden threads, one uses chakra lines for puppetry and the last manipulates mirrors. They also pass their answers to their teammates, Temari and Lee.

(Sakura is the only confirmed character to do the entire test without cheating. Congrats Sakura!! You could argue Hinata used her byakuugan to cheat like Neji, but if you think she did it by herself, I will give you the pleasure of congratulating Hinata too. Congrats Hinata!)

Tenten's method was practical, and used her specific skill set: summoning and kunai work (where do you think the mirrors came from? a scroll, that's for sure). It was probably set up before the test started, during the commotion Team 7 created with their arrival. We're not shown it because Tenten is a tertiary character and Kishimoto wouldn't invest 2-3 panels of set up for a 3 panel sequence pay-off that works by itself very well. She is smart, did great and made sure her teammate was not left behind.

Tenten is not even the most absurd method used in this exam, so, as a treat, i will show you, in order, the most obvious cheats shown in the manga from least to most!

Sasuke's Sharingan If you're a ninja from the Leaf Village, you know who Sasuke Uchiha is and what a Sharingan is capable of. Unfortunally for him, the Exam is being held at the Leaf Village and all the jounin and chuunin there are from the Village. Any proctor looking at his direction in a position in front of him could see clearly his eyes and know exactly what he was doing.

Neji's Byukuugan Like the Sharigan, you can physhically see when it's activated, with the downgrade of being noticible by people sitting at up to 95º from him, as the veins are visible on the sides of his face too. A fair trade for the ability to see better than the Sharingan, even if you're not able to copy, in my personal opinion.

Ino's Mind Transfer Jutsu The jutsu's hand signal is simple and can be missed, but it's still obvious for any Konoha ninja watching, it is a very recognizable ability. There's also the higher chance of Ino being caught since she needs to do it three times (once for getting Sakura's answers, twice to pass them to Chouji and Shikamaru). Besides, the "dropping dead on the table" thing can be disruptive in a mostly silent classroom.

Akamaru and Kiba's communication Akamaru is barking all the way through the exam, and while the balloon used for the text is the one for thoughts, it's also the same used for whispered conversations up to this point in the manga. The anime makes the barks happen in the real world, and not in their thoughts, and as far as i could find, Kiba can understand dog language but there's no psychic talk between them. By the noise alone he could be caught. I think he wasn't expelled just because a full conversation between dog and human is a novel enough ability to not be considered by most ninjas unaware of the Inuzuka clan's special abilities.

The Most absurd one: Kakuro and his Puppet He put an entire guy no one knows and has never been seen in a room where all the authorities are from the same village and have, at least, a vague knowledge of each other's existence. To increase the absurdity, somehow everyone let Kankuro use his own puppet to guide himself to the bathroom. I cannot express enough how unlikely it is that, in a real info gathering mission inside a single room where all the higher rank ninjas are exclusively from the same village, Kakuro's plan could work. Most decent sensors could also catch the chakra line's signature.

I'll give it to him, making the puppet talk helps with the disguise, but it only fools his fellow attendees, not the proctors. He's too confident that he didn't raise any alarms.

But Ibiki goes as far as insinuating he knows (and has known from the start) about the puppet's existence when Kankuro comes back from the bathroom.

If Kankuro was able to finish the test and not get disqualified, even if he had what I consider the most obvious cheating attempt from the named characters shown, it's fair game for Tenten and all the other important cheaters. Besides, it's a single attempt at cheating, even if it required an entire prep work for it, so it doesn't matter if all the high level ninja's are aware, that's not enough to kick him out.

I cannot leave out the meta reasons why these characters weren't removed from the class: they're important to varying degrees to the story and they need to advance through the first phase to keep readers engaged.

Regardless of how absurd I think Kiba's and Kankuro's methods are, they need to go all the way to the fight tournament after the Forest of Death, where they have important roles to fill: Sasuke and Naruto are main characters and are prioritized by the narrative; Ino and Sakura will have an important character developments and flashbacks during their fight; Neji has an entire arc that only concludes all the way in his fight against Naruto; Kiba is the rival for Naruto in the surprise fighting tournament and he is one of the few characters able to match Naruto's silliness so he can win in a silly way; Kankuro and Tenten are both part of the two strongest cells present in the event, the Sand Siblings and Team Gai, both introduced as real threats to Team 7, and having anyone from these cells lose would undermine the narrative created around then. All of them would get through anyway.

Tenten losing against Temari in future parts of the Chuunin Exam has narrative importance too, a fight I will cover in the next In Defense of Tenten, but in short Tenten was introduced as a threat alongside Neji and Lee, her abilities and experience surpassing Team 7's. Having her lose against one the Sand Shinobi serves to show how big their gap in power is: if someone more experienced and well trained than them can't win against them, Team 7 has no chance. It's part of the build up for the future Naruto and Gaara fight, and the suspense about their real strength (since the fight doesn't exist in the manga, only the result is shown).

Conclusion: people are overly critical of Tenten because she's seen as a "lolcow" in the Naruto fandom, in part by the bad adaptation of her fight with Temari to the anime, which poisoned any feat of hers before and after it; but also because Naruto and Boruto don't give satisfying ends to any of the original female cast besides Hinata (she marries the man she loves and becomes a housewife away from the battlefield, an honorable decision i will never shit on, she never wanted to be a ninja and is a kind mother and wife, good for her!) so all female characters are seem as weak and useless when compared to their male peers. Naruto is a work riddled with undercover misogyny, never out right stated but always preventing the girls to achieve any meaningful resolution or permanent development.

That added to the ever expanding powerscalling abilities and fights make characters with simpler and down to earth abilities and feats outdated by its own universe. Knowing how big the Naruto fights and jutsu get in the future make people look down on crafty solutions like sealing scrolls, kunai and mirrors, when that is a perfectly respectable solution within the series and matches the powerlevel presented this early in the story.

Tenten is not weak, or bad, or useless. She's misrepresented by the most popular media consumed: the anime, and further misunderstood by the fans of said work. Large fandoms can be allergic to text interpretation and infighting is stimulated to the point fans of smaller characters are bullied off social media and forums (i.e. the forum where I got the list of all chapters Tenten is in is filled to the brim with comments about how OP should move the topic to "fan works" since no one would want to read about it in the canon work page, or how the mods shouldn't allow him to have a thread). I respect Tenten's feats, as well as other small characters', and refuse to be fed the same "uselessness" narrative this fandom always had, because i actually enjoy Naruto, even if i have many problems with it, and I take it seriously.

She did great.

[rottenpumpkin13]

Out Of Context Shit Heard On The SOLDIER Floor #7

Genesis: SEPHIROTH, STOP MEOWING AT ME.

Kunsel: Any loser twink can be a fem-boy, but it takes a real badass to be a fem-man.

Sephiroth: Did I "yee-haw" with joy, or did it convey depression?

Zack, holding up Cloud: BEHOLD.

Sephiroth, stealing a fry from Angeal's plate: A most generous offering. You will be spared. Angeal: FROM? Sephiroth: You will be spared.

Genesis, wearing sunglasses and holding a cappuccino: So there I was, gelato on my breasts—

Cloud: Aww, that's such a cute Halloween decoration. *pointing at Genesis sobbing in the corner*

Angeal: Who put a hotdog in the candy bowl?? Zack, in the background: Halloweenie.

Sephiroth: I could've sworn "motherfucker" was a compliment.

Angeal: IF YOU EAT THAT WEEK-OLD SUSHI PLATTER, YOUR INTESTINES WILL BECOME RADIOACTIVE.

Sephiroth: Zack, can I enjoy this steak dinner without you explaining A/B/O to me?

Lazard: I think we ALL need to beat our fathers with shovels, Sephiroth, you're not special.

Zack: NO! THAT'S MY EMOTIONAL SUPPORT BANANA!

Genesis: He manspreads to assert dominance, I manspread to create a barrier between myself and heteronormativity. We are not the same.

Sephiroth: I just sent Angeal an email describing my feelings for him. If he doesn't reply, I'll show up at his apartment and superglue myself to the door.

Zack: Give me a pen, paper, and three Adderall, and I'll write something better than Loveless in one hour.

Kunsel: Everyone is subjected to failure, but at least I'm not Roche, who thought the plural of ninja was ninji.

Sephiroth: I have exactly three crayons on my person right now, and they're all stolen from Zack.

Angeal, chewing with his mouth full: Don't make psycho-sexual comments in front of my cheeseburger.

Zack, narrating what he's seeing: 🎶 Look at Angeal 🎶 beating Sephiroth with a frozen chicken because he forgot to take it out the freezer. 🎶

Sephiroth: Please refrain from analyzing my deep-seated fear of abandonment linked to my mother's absence and its impact on my emotional regulation, it's seven in the morning and I still haven't had coffee.

Cloud: I'm about two mental breakdowns away from resorting to gang affiliation.

Genesis: COUNTER SPELL! *flicks his wrist* TRAUMA!

Roche: I often have nightmares about Sephiroth attacking me with a spork.

Sephiroth, in the presence of a spider: I feel anti-at peace.

Zack: Dear diary, today I committed tax evasion, and felt great. Tomorrow I'll try embezzlement and eventually vandalism!

Sephiroth: Can you read this death threat note and check if my handwriting is recognizable?

Zack and Genesis: *Loudly arguing over who gets to be the ring bearer at Sephiroth and Angeal's wedding*

Angeal, laying on the floor: Good luck trying to find my will to live, gang.

Genesis: I'm flashing you a tit to maintain our friendship.

Sephiroth: If I had a gil for every time someone compared me to a cat, I'd have enough to purchase that expensive human cat bed that has been on my wishlist for ages.

Roche: Is my discount wig a joke to you, Zackary?

Cloud, placing an "I miss you" letter from his mother in Sephiroth's line of view: Yeah, that's right. Fuck you.

Lazard: Someone pinned a death threat on my office door written in glitter gel pen.

Genesis, flirting: I own an air-fryer.

Angeal: T-shirt that says "I survived Zack's power point presentation on aliens that included a photo of Sephiroth on the fourth slide"

Roche: Cloud Strife's evil twin…Grass Peace.

Sephiroth: *Showing Zack pictures of baby cows while Zack sobs into his burger*

Genesis: PUT. MASAMUNE. DOWN. No one is stealing your crayons.

Sephiroth: Genesis, I feel inspired to compliment your ass.

Lazard: Take a good, hard look at Sephiroth wearing flip-flops and tell me I shouldn't be stressed.

Sephiroth: A most efficient weapon to add to my arsenal *wielding an entire streetlamp*

Zack, talking to Angeal: My insecure trooper and faceless info guy, versus your 6'7 cat and walking red flag.

Kunsel: Is the cure to male loneliness *incomprehensible screeching* ?

[razzle-zazzle]

okay so upon some thought i have decided! that the concept I've been talking about earlier today is called the Murky Reflections AU! This should be pretty self explanatory :]

[evilkitten3]

ok so like i know the reason is just. sexism but one thing that really irks me about how the post-timeskip naruto manga handled which characters became medic nin bc it makes absolutely no sense to me

sakura's decision to train under tsunade makes sense, and i love that she got a super strength power up, so no notes there, but the other teams.... yeesh

so first off, team ten. we're told that ino decided to follow sakura into mednin land to keep being rivals with her... despite that at no point factoring into their rivalry at all beforehand. ino never showed any interest in that, nor was the yamanaka clan ever mentioned to have anything to do with healing as far as i can remember. it's like going to art school to stay with your bestie when your goal is to become a dentist. why are you there. find other ways to spend time together. it also kinda goes against her family's whole thing as. the guys who do the torture stuff. and it's barely ever relevant anyway

for team ten, i think the team medic should've been shikamaru, and i think this not just bc i think it makes more sense skill-wise (something about the way the nara clan's various shadow jutsu work just screams "you need good chakra control for this" to me), but also bc i think it would make asuma's death a thousand times more painful. bc shikamaru is a slacker. he's not learning medical ninjutsu bc he wants to, he's learning it bc someone on the team has to in order to stick together. they're all chuunin now; one of them has to be a medic. them's the rules. but he doesn't really care that much, even when he is trying to learn, and he's so used to being smart enough to not have to pay attention in lessons anyway that he's not prepared for classes that require his full focus. and then asuma dies and shikamaru is doomed to spend the rest of his fucking life wondering if he could've saved him by paying just a little more attention to those medical ninjutsu lessons (he could not have (but he'll never know for sure))

team eight makes some sense, since giving the girl who struggles with fighting the healing job isn't exactly out of nowhere, but i do feel it was the lazy choice. kiba already had a sister involved in the medical business, even if she deals more with animals, so he could've started learning from her and found that he liked it. plus kiba's goal is to be hokage, and the current hokage is a mednin, so it's not like it wouldn't support his goal. or shino could do it; would add another layer to his character. hinata works fine but. it's just not a very interesting development imo

but what really gets me is team gai. good freaking grief. out of every single team, team gai was the one with the most obvious choice. bc there was only one choice. lee can't do any kind of ninjutsu, and tenten's only real backstory is that her chakra control isn't good enough for her to be a medic nin. so it had to be neji. canon establishes that every team has to have a medic; this is a policy tsunade got passed even before she became hokage, so no way in hell is she going back on it now.

moreover, neji becoming a medical ninja - especially if hiashi encouraged it - would show some development for the hyuuga clan maybe starting to suck a bit less. bc as a medic, neji would be bound by oath to stay alive for as long as possible. imagine a world in which hizashi came back and hiashi was able to tell his brother that not only was their family starting to change, but his son had chosen a path that would prevent him from ever following in his father's footsteps. it would be the first step (of many) to show that the hyuuga clan was freeing itself from its own bullshit.

also it would've made sakura catching the zetsu pretending to be neji a thousand times funnier. like that's her coworker. they've shared shifts at the hospital together. she's seen neji drink vodka straight from a bottle and then crash on her couch after they got out of a twelve-hour surgery on the fucking dumbass chuunin who managed to step on his own boobytrap. she knows him.

[autumnmobile12]

I'm just gonna pretend this is a compilation of Dabi and Mr. Compress questioning every decision that's brought them to this point.

I mean, this kinda looks like Compress dropped his cell phone and Dabi's too tired to give him crap about it.

"Coulda just gone home and been a normal kid. Now I'm careening down a highway with a lizard ninja, a guy who’s so desperate to be held that he wears hands, and this mofo who has the audacity to be ordering a pizza right now.”

"We were promised pizza."

*elevator music, no brain cells left*

"No, I know exactly where we are!"

"How's the car sickness?"

"Fuck you!"

"You ready for the 'I told you so?'"

"You are such a brat."

They just look done. They're either tired or constipated or both.

[nasturtium-palace]

I know we're way past agent Walker but like, pls hear me out?

So I was doing that agent walker piece I promised like a couple weeks ago, and I had a thought. Like, I read a lot of fanfics where the administration was painted as wanting to strip people of individuality. Pretty sure we don't see much of it in the show. Like, sure, they're all "agent" and they all wear suits but that's not much. So I was thinking, what if the administration not only had uniforms, but also dress codes. Like you know, your hair has to be slicked back, can't stick out kind of dress codes. You will get nagged by a higher up or get a uniform complaint that you'll have to fill out every time your hair pokes out wrong or for messing up your suit even slightly, like a small faint stain kind of dress code. You can't dirty your uniform up or you'll need to pay for a new one kind of dress code. You have to look how they want you to all the time kind of dress code. And if you add anything that is yours, that is personal - another dresscode violation. You know, it is literal corporate hell, right.

What I mean is that it would be a subtle but really telling detail to have the agents all in like three specific hairstyles and that's all. If they want to strip you of your individuality, they would pay much more attention to the agents self expression, which is in many cases through your clothes or hair.

So I was imagining Jay brushing out and straightening his hair every morning, just for it to become frizzy after a couple hours anyways. Self control every minute, to get the agents in their heads, paranoid. Also it would be a great opportunity to have Jay in a hairstyle more simillar to what he was wearing in the earlier seasons. I feel like he'll still be okay with some uniform violations, because he probably was locked up in his office most of the day, but whenever he would go out, he'd need to put himself together.

Another nice thing is that through this, Jay would look different to how he used to. I know that the point of the ninja seeing him in season 2 part 2 was that he was a familliar face, but I mean, did he feel like Jay? That's what I'm steering at. Having him not exactly look like they remember him would also be great visual storytelling for his own lack of identity.

I understand that for the viewers sake, Jay had to look the same as his current design. But just some food for thought.

And I mean, tell me the administration doesn't have a milion files for uniform violation. They surely do.

[random-remzy]

Ok but, what if Jay(still an amnesiac) slowly falls in love with Nya again.

What if he never gets his memories back, or what the way to get his memories back is destroyed.

What if we never see the old Jay again.

What if we see this Jay, fall in love with Nya all over again.

What if we see all the ninja upset over that fact that they'll never see their Jay ever again-

-But they slowly begin to love this version of him. Because it's still him. Still the same sarcasm, same humor, same stubborness. He's still Jay. He's still their brother.

What if we see Nya crying and screaming and angry over never seeing her Jay ever again.

And slowly, slowly and cautiously she lets herself fall in love with him. Its new and familiar all at once and she's so sad that she'll never see the old him again, but so indescribably happy that at least now he's back and with her and he fell in love with her again.

idk i just don't want him to get his memories back anymore. Like- i want him to relearn his love and affection that he had for this ragtag group of losers that love him to the ends of the merged realms and back. I want him to relearn the nature of his powers as if its the frst time again. I want him to meat Ed and Edna and have no idea who they are but have this ingrained feeling in his heart that they're family.

I want him to look into the mirror after years spent with the ninja, still never knowing what exactly he was like before the merge. But still he'll look into the mirror and he just knows. Knows its the same face, same voice, same love. and he just knows.

This is home.

[ohai-there]

post canon SVSSS x minato hokage era naruto crossover where it's scumplane (bcos i love scumplane) heading to the elemental nations on official business for some reason or another (maybe theres a barrier between their lands to prevent leakage of spiritual energy or somethign) SJ hates being alive purely because it means he's in SQH's debt for ripping him out of SQQ's body that Shen Yuan was inhabiting and reviving SJ (because SY decided to fuck off and live his best life as the demon emperor's wife and Cang Qiong NEEDS a peak lord for Qing Jing)

canonically immortals are extremely beautiful (even SQH is described as a 'proper' face iirc) and SJ is like TOP TIER beauty, but also immortals are sometimes described to have faces 'carved from jade' so I imagine when they step into immortality, they no longer have micro expressions and have like... crazy control over their facial muscles - so it kinda freaks out the ninjas, because the only emotions they can see is exactly what scumplane want them to see (SJ - disgust, usually. SQH - cowardice/flattery)

Scumplane also have 0 sense of danger when it comes to shinobi - they're immortals and old (lets say this is an indetermined amount of time after canon wraps up) so things like mundane steel and mortal poisons mean nothing to them when theyre so old. They also don't even bother holding back their tongues because what can these mortals even do to them? Worse comes to worse, they just seal up the worlds again, or just wait out for all these mortals to die (a strategy they use for troublesome emperors or politicians).

They also bring their disciples (Ming Fan specifically because I want him to have a redemption) and after canon had wrapped up the PIDW's story finished, everyone in the world actually bounced back into their rightful places (e.g. MF suddenly got a second puberty, his face improved to be beautiful as it should be and his intelligence returned to the level that the head disciple of the scholarly peak should be).

I want it to be during Minato hokage's short, short tenure - Minato is 23, a war hero and recently hired as ninja president, Konoha just came out of a war and suddenly the daimyo is paying WELL and hiring for the best teams of Konoha to escort these foreigners who are so otherwordly beautiful and so otherworldly RICH, like, the material of the clothes they wear puts the daimyos court to shame, they can pay in pure gold and stones thrumming with power.

SJ's whole thing is like... based on image. So imagine SQH bowing and being like 'ooh thank you for your hospitality' and SJ just grabbing him by the back of his collar and hauling him up like 'wtf dont even bother bowing to this guy. Have some face. he's only got the same rank as you AND he's a fucking child.'

(He's figured that Daimyo = weak emperor-ish, because what kind of a emperor only has control of such a small land AND has others in nearby lands with the same, competing title????. Hokage & Konoha is like the sects, and all the peak lords of CQS are of the same rank as a sect leader. Of course, they all defer to YQY officially, but tbh all the peaks run like their own individual sects, and SJ has never allowed himself to act below YQY in rank)

During Minato's reign, Orochimaru is still a loyal Konoha shinobi.... his interest in immortals makes him soooooo crazy invested in them....

SJ looks at Orochimaru who's questioning him on immortality and is like, 'out of all these people, you are the closest. Your mind is too unstable, however (ironic, coming from SJ) and you still cling too tightly to the material world. Abandon all worldly matters and immortality may be in your grasp, if the heavens deign it so.' acting like he's a good teacher or something, while SQH is in the background, the voice of reason like 'SHIXIONG WTF!!! WE'RE NOTT SUPPOSED TO BE GIVING UP THE SECRET TO IMMORTALITY TO THE MORTALS OF THE FORBIDDEN REALM????'

Maybe SQH does know they're in the naruto world, and knows what naruto is, (hc that the water walking we see YQY do in the donghua was ripped off from naruto, when SQH was still writing PIDW) but it's been like 200+ years! He can't remember shit!!! This is all new information to him!