#theyre so good catch me sobbing

[mushiewrites]

Hi mushiiiiiiie! Hc that Dream is the type of person who's go to method of waking someone up is tickling them. And in George's first week in the dteam house, his struggle with jet lag this is highly unfortunate for him 😭

-emmadoodlewrites

The way I was squealed at this. Emma you lil evil genius 🥺 Your concepts are too good pls spare me (don't stop sending them tho you kill me in the best way)

No but YEAH, Sapnap has lived with Dream for over a year, so he has fell victim to Dream's way of waking him up if he's taking a little too long to get up. George however, has only heard a few stories here and there, not thinking anything of it and not storing the information away in his mind because of how minuscule it seemed to be.

So when a week after George moves in, and the three of them are supposed to have a stream train all day, Sapnap and Dream are waiting around for George to come into the recording room. They think he's in the shower or something, but when they go to check he's still asleep!

okay yeah I didn't mean to get carried away but here's a lil ficlet type thing under the cut because I couldn't help myself 😅

"Dream, just-" Sapnap was met with a harsh but quiet "sh!" from the blonde, who was already making his way over to the older boys bed, shooting Sap a quick smirk that sent shivers down his spine. He knew what George was in for, so he took a step back, leaning against the doorframe and taking his place to watch the chaos unfold.

Dream had slowly climbed up onto George's bed, straddling his waist as the brunette continued to sleep. He was face down against his pillow, little snores falling out here and there every few seconds if he took in a particularly deeper breath in his slumber. Dream looked at him for a few seconds, taking in the flushed cheeks and the way his eyelashes rested against his cheeks. He almost felt bad for what he was about to do.

But not bad enough to not continue.

Dream began to trace his two pointer fingers up and down the back of the boys ribs, a small smirk on his face as George already began stirring from the light tickles. He grunted, moving to shove his face further into the pillow, clearly not fully awake yet. Dream turned his head towards Sapnap, who was quietly giggling still stood in the doorway watching.

"He's so ticklish already, I'm not even doing anything!" Dream whispered to the younger boy, both of them softly cooing at how adorable George is. Dream continued his task at hand, moving his tracing fingers up and over his shoulder blades, and down under his arms, lightly dragging them down his ribs to his sides.

This got a high pitched squeal from George when the tickly fingers reached under his arms, causing the brunette to pull his arms down to his sides slowly, waking up more and more but not fully registering what was going on. Dream continued fluttering his fingers over George's sides, adding the rest of his fingers as he moved his hands over his lower back.

George jolted, waking himself up and opening the floodgates of his laughter.

"W-Whahahat? I'm- Whahahat ihihis thihihis?!" the more alert George got, the more Dream decided to actually tickle. He wasn't dragging his fingers anymore, instead opted to lodge them between George's arms pressed to his sides, squeezing up and down his lower set of ribs. George practically howled at that, moving his arms and trying to grab at Dream's hands but the angle made it hard to.

"Well look who finally chose to wake up!" Dream teased, giggling while trying his best to keep himself planted on George's waist as the boy beneath him began bucking like his life depended on it. "You decided to bless us with your consciousness once again!"

"DREHEHEAM! NAHAHAHAHA!" George was in hysterics already as he felt fingers sliding between his ribs with the perfect amount of pressure. It felt like electricity, very tickly electricity, was coursing through his skin. He was kicking and burying his face into the pillow, grabbing at the sheets, Dream's sweatpants, his own shirt, his hair - anywhere he could as he continued cackling from the ruthless attack. After another minute of digging into George's bottom ribs, making his laugh go high pitched and sprinkling in a few shrieks, Dream finally climbed off the smaller boy and gave him space to breathe.

"W-Whahahat the....fuhuhuck?" George managed to force out in between gulps of air, giggles still tumbling out as he turned over onto his back, covering his now bright red face with his hands and groaning when he heard Sapnap laugh, realizing he witnessed the whole thing.

"Are you gonna get up and join us now? Or do I need to continue?" he heard Dream say from somewhere close, causing him to jerk away from the hand that lightly tapped onto his sides again and throw the blankets off.

"Nohoho no! I'm up! I'm up!" the brunette practically squealed as he threw himself to the other side of the bed, sitting up and finally meeting the green eyes that had been watching him this whole time. Dream rolled his eyes at George, holding out a hand to him to show he was done. George spent a few seconds eyeing the hand before taking it, allowing Dream to help him off the bed and into a standing position, even though his legs felt like jello.

"You're actually evil. Bohoth of you." George mumbled, trying to sound annoyed but failing due to the giggle that slipped out accidentally.

"Yeah yeah pretty boy, just go get ready. We're streaming in ten." George watched as the two disappeared down the hallway, groaning as he pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes, still flustered and still feeling the ghost tickles along his ribs.

[pavl0ve]

waiting for the rule of three parallels to finish roy giving up his career to tackle jamie One Last Time / the heatbutt and hug / royjamie celebrations as richmond win the cup

[privitivium]

Hear me out, in a different timeline, reader had a lover when yan freak moved in as a roommate, everytime yan freak tries to get rid of the "unnecessary distraction" his reader is always there making him stop each time in his tracks

Each time he fails, he becomes more destructive, he starts taking out his frustration to his room, he doesn't want reader to see him like this, he really doesn't! But if that bitch keeps sticking around he might as well show it in action, thoughts?

nice thoughts... didnt understand the last part, but im digging the idea in general. got some perverted shit cooking in my brain,,,

the fucking freak whos so out of touch literally touches on you more than ur lover bro. Imagine that. ur lover is secure, of course, but seeing how this freak is with you,,, they dont appreciate him as ur roommate. they, and you, would hate him if they knew how exactly creepy he is,,, and i mean. you do know. you know lots of things. but... not to the extent of this guy standing outside the bathroom and jerking off to the mere sound of water slipping down ur body to the tile,,, you knew how much he liked you "as a friend", he was really affectionate n touchy in general and overall really nice!! you were oblivious. but anyway.

everytime he tries... seperating you two, you somehow stop him? and him taking out his frustration on his room? and then, you catching him? what... what would you do,,, laugh at him? it must be fate. Not being together... but he doesnt like fate. this freak being such a creepy little twerp and pressing his ear to the wall when you have your lover over, literally rolling around and flailing n sobbing quietly as he hears the soft fumbling of clothes and breathless moans trying so hard to keep quiet. [ wont b long b4 thats u n him... he's delusional :( ]

and obviously, oblivious to your little freaky friend sabotaging your lover, setting them up for failure when his own plans dont work out in the long game... like. FINALLY! theyre out of the picture n now yan freak can swoop in and be the loving roommate who also doubles as a fuckhole for you to pour ur feelings into !!! cmon, dont worry about them,,,, woahh doesnt his taut lil hole feel sooo good around ur thick cock? hm? why is he crying? well, you just feel so good dont woryr about it... [ soo super happy that hes crying tears of joy even while ur still distraught over ur lover while fucking him. ]

[rayroseu]

THE MAJESTIC EXCELLENCY HERSELF 😍😍😍😍💚💚💚💚 also maybe its just me but is it a reach to hope that an ACTUAL Disney villain can cameo in TWST?? 😆 You know like how Mickey randomly appears before us akjdkss

Also i find it interesting how Yuu immediately got up to go to the Maleficent Statue after concluding the dream as "Maleficent is being left out..." She reminded him of One Guy lol 😭 Also Yuu lore crumbs that theyre finally catching up that their dreams is related to the next overblot lol

ALSO AAAAAHHH SEBEKKKK 💚💚💚✨✨✨ I missed hearing his "human!!" FULLY VOICED✨✨✨ Haruki Ishiya san... thank you 😭💚💚💚

I love his attitude change LMFAO and Silver being the polite person he is insisting Sebek to apologize and Sebek just doesnt lol... SOBS... Also agree with Grim lol Diasomnia literally the most dramatic dorm lol

Also I find it so funny that "Malleus evil smile" expression is his Happiest Expression LMFOAOAOA He's thoroughly AMUSED by Yuu calling him Hornton in front of Sebek (of all people) without hesitance 😭😭

Ohhh Malleus loves chaos alright ✅✅✅💥💥 and his family and friends getting along...😭😭💕💕💕

Also the part where the npcs talked about him broke my heart aughh...

He's just talking with his classmates and everyone is already whispering how "he shouldn't be in this school he's going to curse everyone" (OKAY maybe theyre going to be right about that in a few more updates butksjdjs) But aaa knowing the fact he has superb hearing skills.... I like to imagine he's hearing these rumors while talking to Yuu and the knights but he's just ignoring the rumors since there's a few peopke who are treating him like a normal person right now 😭😭

I LOVE HOW THIS IMPLIES LILIA RELIES ON SILVER THE MOST TOO!!! He couldve asked Sebek or Malleus since theyre the people with no sleep problems... but nooo he insisted on Silver waking him up!! AUDGAUHS I thought he's a general who focuses on efficiency... 😭😭 He just wants Silver to wake him up... i know you lilia 🔍🔍🔍🤨🤨

I am in good pain... considering!! in Book 7!! Lilia repeatedly appears to be a reliance for Silver whenever he feels hopeless... I CANT. Lilia is just like more lowkey about how much he actually relies on his son 😭😭💚💚

ROOK BEING IN THE RUINS TOO IS SO FUNNY LFMAOOO THATS ONE OF MALLEUS' TOP INTERSHIP LIST??? ITS LILIA'S P.E VIGNETTE ALL OVER AGAIN LMFOAOAA HE'S GONNA HARASS MALLEUS DOWN IF THEYRE COWORKERS AHFHAHDHA

Imagine them in the ruins and finally Malleus has someone who is enthusiastic about ""boring facts about Gargoyles and Abandoned Ruins"" but its just... got to be THIS GUY Rook Hunt... who once tried to playfully harm Lilia lol

Malleus and Rook Duo is actually so funny though 😂😂 It still cracks me up that Malleus was once invited on Rooks Bday but he didnt attend cuz he's annoying to him and most notably Rook is not even hostile to him??? He just didnt attend bcs he hates his guts omg😭😭💥💥

This fact is so weird to me... What do you mean that some teeth just becomes an automatic RADIO under the right conditions????😭 Is this a foreshadow to Zigvolts Dentistry??? 😳⚡💚✨✨✨

Can a fae teeth play Elvis Presley just by opening their mouths...?? You know like Stitch acting as a phonograph... 😂

But I doubt??? They have radio towers at Briar Valley so it probably doesnt happen????? But It'd be pretty funny if Briar Valley radio just play bardcore music and one poor fae was "cursed" to have "magical radio teeth" playing bardcore everytime lol

My first thought was "Sebek!!!!✨✨✨" here actually 😭💚 Since he's the only freshman we're missing rn...

But I was surprised Yuu thought of Malleus??? That just further implies Yuu recognizes him as a friend that'll help them too 😭😭😭

Its just precious to think that someone finds Malleus reliable, he'll be so happy to assist Yuu if they're having trouble with anything just like how he enthusiastically offered to explain more about the Thorn Fairy since Yuu is curious about it...😭💖💞💖💗💕 I love them to BITS OMFG...

(I'm sad that Yuu is going home too but I'm ignoring that lol🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️ Yuu is a self insert theyre supposed to speak MY language of staying with Mal-)

Its devastating that the freshmen are so hyped up to be working together THEY ARE NOT PROCESSING THE IMPLICATIONS OF YUU GOING HOME... 💔😂 if Yuu truly goes home, theres no reason for them to be gathering like this on the cafeteria anymore... 😭😭💔💔 Making myself sad that they'll buy an extra plate for them during lunch break and not even Grim touches that food... just to honor their friend😭😭😭

Wait so we know that the first night in "sleepover to discover Mickey" consists of Deuce and Ace as Grim and Yuu's companion...

Maybe the next nights (without Malleus' overblot interupption) consisted of Epel and Jack, and then possibly Ortho and Malleus??? (since Ortho is the one who suggested that therell be a fae)

Oh but Im going to cry if at Book 7's ending consisted of Yuu inviting Malleus for a sleepover at Ramshackle despite what happened... 😭😭😭 and and like the stars aligning appears once again but this time he's not at ruined Ramshackle missing his friend... He's at a peaceful sleepover with a friend group auGh... 😭😭😭💖💕💞💗💞💗

[pouringmyheartoutforpaper]

heyy i have a request for the steve x dove universe bcos it’s literally my favourite thing atm

could u possibly do something like where their at a party and someone tries something on reader and they’re really pushy about it even though she keeps saying no. obvs steve cannot have anyone touching or upsetting his sweetest girl so gets the guy to go away. while steve is dealing with the guy maybe reader starts having a panic attack because that guy had really scared her and robin tries to comfort her but obvs the only person capable of that is steve. when steve’s done w the guy he notices how distressed reader is and just comforts her, holds her and just FLUFF.

i got this idea because i noticed how protective of r steve is and i thought this would be a good example of it😍😍🩷🩷🩷🩷

sorry it took a few days ! also this is not proofread because it is three am so my apologies.

warning! this contains depictions of harassment and a panic attack. if this is not something you feel like you can read right now, please please click away. there is no shame in setting boundaries with yourself. there are lots of other stories. please be safe <3

the lights in the house were an array of purples and blues. robin’s friend threw a party, and robin insisted that dove and steve both come so she wouldnt be alone. dove dances as much as she can, but after about an hour she ends up crashing into steves chest. theyre leaned against the wall, and steves hands are covering her ears from the loud music.

“stevie, gonna go get some water. ill be right back.”

he expected her to stay in his line of vision, and by the time she disappeared around the corner into the kitchen, he was in panic mode. the party housed a few unsavory characters, and his dove’s shyness could lead to disaster.

in the kitchen dove had asked the hostess where the water resided, and she had kindly gotten her a glass of water, making sure to fill it in front of her so she knew it wasnt tampered with.

unfortunately, the hostess was called away, and a man around five to ten years older than dove entered the kitchen. she offered a small smile, and he took that as an invitation in his drunken state.

“hey pretty thing” he slurred.

she ignored him, and tried to exit the room, only for him to grab her hand.

“where y’ goin? you don’t want to hang out with me, baby? if you didn’t want the attention you shouldve picked a different dress.”

she ripped her hand away, and she knew the only way to get him to back off would be to mention steve. men like this respect women not as people, but as property.

“i have a boyfriend. hes looking for me.”

“not very hard, he left you here with me.”

in the distance she see steves head of hair frantically searching the house for the kitchen, and as the man kept babbling about nonsense and trying to grab her waist, she yelled his name.

his head shot to where he heard her voice, catching her eye instantly.

“help,” she mouthed.

dove had never seen a man move so quickly in her life. it seemed a second before steve stood tall between them. he held her behind him, and dove knew that he would have to be scary. she closed her eyes and gripped onto his arm.

after many words were spoken, mostly from steve, the other man merely slurred nonsense. he pushed the stranger into the shelves behind him before escorting dove out of the room.

“it’s okay, it’s okay, i’m here, i’ve got you, we’re gonna go home,” he whispered assuringly as he guided her out of the crowded room, trying to ignore the urge to go back and hurt the stranger, knowing it would scare her more. he was plagued with guilt and fear. guilt that he had let her out of his sight. the sobs come from his dove quickly. he helps her into the back seat of his car and locks the doors.

“hey, hey, look at me, youre okay, tell me what happened” he said, his voice shaking.

“nothing,” she says breathlessly, “nothing bad- just-“ her breathing becomes panicked, and the words arent forming. she had told him about her panic attacks before, but he had never seen her experience one. luckily he had done research.

“panic attack” she forced out between short breaths. the air couldnt reach her lungs, at least it felt like it couldnt. steve was panicking, trying to regulate her breathing. trying to soothe while also digging through his center console for an inhaler.

“hey, look at me, try to take a deep breath with me. i know, i know its hard, i just need you to try.” he said, taking her hand and placing it on his chest, breathing in a long breath and watching her struggle to do the same. but after three breaths she was calm enough that steve could help her with the inhaler.

once her breath returned to her, she buried her face into his chest, apologizing profusely.

“you dont need to be sorry. you did nothing wrong.” he repeated the phrase like a mantra while he rocked her back and forth.

she looked up at him. “i love you”

“i love you too. so much. you feel better?”

“yeah i- he was just being scary and he kept- grabbing me and he wouldn’t let me pass. i- it just- it freaked me out.”

“im so sorry honey. are you hurt? i shouldve went after you.” he whispered.

“no! you didnt do anything wrong. im not hurt, just got scared.”

“yeah? how about i take us home and we can order food, maybe watch a movie or something? and then we can talk about it tomorrow morning if you want to.”

“yes please”

[hiemaldesirae]

Swap AU:

Charlie and Vaggie both know That Vox is there on Lucifer's behalf, but once they see Vox freak out because of Alastor's Shadow (Alastor took over the Shadow and was gently petting Vox's rabbit ears (just how sleepy Vox likes it), before he spoke through the radio to Vox, saying I love you.) Causing the overlord to have a panic attack and blow the power in half of pride. So Vaggie actually gets pretty overprotective of Vox, seeing Alastor as Vox's Adam.

This panic attack is also what allows Husker and Vox to setup their contracted souls and they start building outside of the hotel. Little restaurants, and a gambling joint (where the biggest prize is TVs you don't have to rent, which Charlie thinks is pretty awesome. Not even Nobles have their own TVs, so this will definitely bring in the spotlight for the hotel!) One of the surviving contracted souls of Vox's is a goetia, who can go to earth, and Vox uses them have the hotel offer earthly goods.

At the overlord meeting...since the remaining Vees are contracted Overlords, they aren't invited. Only Alastor and Rosie can come for the Entertainment District and Cannibal town. Vox is on a high dose of (I think it's Xanax they give you for this? I know it's what they gave me to take during my flights because of the anxiety for flying so I'm guessing it may be the same idk) meds so he can get through the meeting unfortunately, Husker can only sit on one of his sides....Who takes the other seat beside Vox? Why Alastor of course.

Who catches Vox's hand with his own under the table, giving it a squeeze and rubbing his thumb over Vox's pulse point in his wrist while Carmilla talks.

While Husk brings up the Angel's head, and points out it could be the cause of the second extermination coming up, Vox is beginning to slowly freak out. He's glad when Carmilla and Zestial say the meeting is over, and he stands up about to jerk his hand away--when Alastor kisses it, murmuring "I'm sorry, my beloved. I'll see you soon." And Husk hisses, grabbing Vox and they hurry back to the hotel.

Vox leaves the lights on in his room that night, but it doesn't stop Alastor from visiting, and covering his precious picture box up with the softest blanket he can conjure....and he also spots the large Cyan scar on Vox's chest, and tears fill the deer demons eyes--he hadn't ment too, he thinks claws digging into his palms. Never you Vox....it'll never happen again. Once I have your soul under my hand no one will hurt you again...myself included. You'll be safe right beside me, where you belong.

oh my GOD vaggie and vox friendship theyre so precious to me <3 wait okay so does al like. send his shadow to the hotel since they cant really get rid of it anyway and they dont know yet that al can posess his shadow ? or what is really going on here im a little lost sorry. the image of al taking the opportunity to stay close to vox when hes in his most vulnerable state just kinda scratches something in my brain though... hes SUCHHH a freak about it all get a JOB stay away from him

OH !!! thats so cool. wait so before that did they just like. have nothing at all lmfao?? cause vox was hiding away or something? cause i dont know if i can image the hotel looking like the shabby rundown mess it was in the show considering the Gambling and Media overlords are here to help run it lmfao. also a GOETIA? my god,, by jove how did that happen

oh this is. oh thats so.... URhrgdhjkfd... the fact that alastors idea of love and posession is so warped that he can only think of owning voxs soula s a means to keep him safe... and he regrets it all so much but its not something that he can ever properly express because he knows vox wouldnt listen and would just try to run away again... im gonna be SICK nonny dont do this to me. i hate ithere

AND YOU DIDNT ANSWER MY QUESTION LAST TIME ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT THEY GET A HAPPY ENDING !!!!!! :sob: im so scared nonny i really am what are you doing with them....

[yanderemommabean]

Please give ghe more unhinged thoughts, theyre amazing

“There we go~ good boy, such a good boy for me” Alex praises, stroking up Sebastian’s cock slowly “Gotta get every last drop from you. Can’t have my baby’s tasty milk going to waste can we?”

Sebastian whimpers, sobbing as he bites down on the gag between his teeth. His hips jerk and try to dislodge the jock, but it’s no use, he’s so weakened and drained that all it does is amuse the man.

“I know, I know, feels too good huh? Hmph you’re so cute like this. Cumming in my hand and being so pretty for me” Alex continues to praise and admire, slowing his ministrations for a moment to soak in the sight.

Poor Sebastian was exhausted, terrified, and confused. Alex is sure Sam has never given him a good time like this, it might as well be Sebastian’s first! Sam has no idea how to touch a man like Sebby, how to make him melt and moan like a good boy.

“Sams never touched you like this has he? Maybe dry humped and called it a day, but he’s never touched you like you needed” Alex bites out, slowly spreading Sebastian’s legs as he licks up his sensitive shaft. “Mmm I can make you feel so good. I can do every nasty thing you can think of, and more. Just tell me what you want and I’ll do it!”.

The gag is taken out with a soft tug, and Sebastian catches his breath, tears forming in his eyes as his sore throat tries to form words. “Just- please I’m sorry for whatever I did! Alex I-I don’t know what I did I’m sorry!”

Alex just hushed him softly, stealing a kiss as he rubs his hands over his chest. “Shh shh shh baby, you didn’t do anything wrong at all! It’s the other people who pushed me to my limit. I hate how they treat you, make you upset. It’s why I had to snatch you up”

Sebastian was about to sob again, but chokes and tenses when he feels Alex’s warm, wet tongue sliding over his hole. “Mmm my sweet baby, being so neglected. Such a pretty hole, needing my attention” he moans, pulling Sebastian’s cheeks apart even more to slither his tongue inside and hold him open.

“Ungh! Alex no! No please! A-ah!” The bound man moans, pathetically fighting as Alex just holds him still, tongue fucking his tight hole as he groans and growls obscenities. “Fuck yes, cute little hole begging for me”.

Fingers join in on the assault, abusing the gummy, velvet walls and bundle of nerves, Sebastian’s body wound tight like a bow as he babbles and begs. “No! No no ugh- please fuck! It’s-its too much please!”

Alex just milks his walls, sucking on his balls as he pumps his fingers in and out. “You got this baby, you can do this! Pushing your limits is hard but great for you” he punctuates his point with a kiss to his weeping cock, grinning as he watches precum drool from the tip.

“Cum. Cum for me and give me that delicious load baby. C’mon, I can feel you squeezing! Cum! Fuck yes, cum for me baby!”

Sebastian cries, tears rolling down his face as he’s forced into another orgasm, spilling across his abdomen and chest as the jock licks it up with psychotic glee.

“P-please…please” Sebastian weakly croaked, eyes red and swollen with tears as his wrists are rubbed raw. Alex just cooes, kissing the sore skin while wiping back his sweat soaked hair. “Alright alright. You were so good for me, I can give you a break. I need to feed my baby anyway, you haven’t been eating enough!”

Sebastian’s heart sinks as he’s readjusted on the bed, with metal instead of rope this time. “You just rest here ok? I’ll get some stuff from Gus and make sure you have more vitamins. Then I can bathe you! I’ll be back babe, get some sleep”

((Mkay this was dumb I’m sorry sksksk -Mommabean))

[streaminn]

Hmm.. Have you guys ever heard of the word bitching in an omegaverse context?

I was thinking of my scent blind au where enid so desperately wished she could've been an alpha so she would be right for wednesday during heaven and back

Content warning for straight up Addams obsession, delusional thoughts and Wednesday lowkey going to the deep end to make sure her and Enid get together even if it meant biologically changing herself

Bc yknow how Addams don't do things in halves, right? It's a whole fanon thing and I'm pretty sure there's signs of it in the show.

It starts like this, Enid is an alpha and Wednesday is a beta.

Simple facts, so very chill. They're still roommates, theyre older now and everything is OK

Except ever since Enid presented, having been a late bloomer like the show, she's been.. Different.

Wednesday isn't stupid, sure she may not have the safe rabid instincts as an omega or an alpha but she can smell well for a beta and she can see the way Enid's face will soften at any distressed omega nearby

It's irritatingly sweet, the way Enid would try to calm them down with her own scent. Except, since she's so new, she forgets how easily safety could equal something else

After the third time Enid has gotten accosted in the way to the dorm room, Wednesday quite frankly was irritated. She would love to stab those pesky students and go on her day but that meant showing that she was bothered

And Wednesday Addams wasn't bothered by anything, why should she? So what, her roommate is simply popular, it happens

Except, there's a part of her that feels wrong whenever she sees yoko drape herself over Divina. She eyes the way the omega would purr and how Divina would roll her eyes yet nose at her hair.

It's sickenly sweet

It's what her parents have it's what she wants with Enid

Being a beta in this au meant three things. One, you don't have an intoxicating scent and thus getting a mate is a tons more harder. Two, you're not built to take an alpha, it's a biological thing and three, the chances of getting a kid is all the more lower

Which is what most alphas would want

It's what Enid would want

So practically everything is against Wednesday. She can't entice Enid like most can do, she is literally not built for her and she knows of how Enid wishes for a family

Wednesday quite frankly isn't the type to wish for a family, quite aware of how troublesome it is but she's willing to change that for Enid

Anything for Enid, for the woman with nothing yet still tried to give her everything

Anything for her.

So, once again, it starts with the internet

Wednesday is ashamed, how far has she fallen to seek for reassurance that beta and alpha relationships could happen? Pretty badly, because when she scrolls and ignores the sobbing cries of beta's feeling inadequate in random blogs, she finds a reply to a rather sad post

It was a question of "pls guys, my alpha keeps looking at others instead of me. I know that I cant entice him like they can but surely there's smth I can do!?"

There were assurances in the replies, others saying that it's not the OP's fault that their alpha couldn't keep their nose to themself until one catches her eyes

It was a reply from a deleted user.

"have you ever thought of being bitched? You wouldn't fully be an omega but you'll pass as one to him and isn't that what matters in the end?"

The thoughts of other users below that were outraged. Whatever this bitching is, it's clearly taboo.

But those words.. "pass as one"

It's not the answer she wanted, but it's close enough.

It's enough to make Wednesday stay up and scour the internet all the more. She delved deeper into chat rooms, posing as an alpha with a kink because the more she went, the more she noted that whatever this is isn't normal at all. She couldn't come in regularly, else she risk losing actual good information

Bitching, from what she's seen, is the process of changing ones second status to an omega. Usually done against someone's will because who would want to willingly bitch themselves? Who would dare degrade themself into smth they weren't born too?

Me, Wednesday thinks as she notes it down. I would.

This is all she did for the next few days, staring at the pc and noting down as much as she could.

She got dragged out once or twice by a concerned Enid because ofcourse she did. The alpha has always been so caring, making sure to knock before cracking it open to ask if they'd like to eat together at the diner that just opened up

Wednesday agrees, she always does and so Wenclair set out. It's times like these where everything else fades away to nothing, status doesn't matter and it's imply just the two of them

Until the waiter comes in, all sly smiles and neck bared. Enid sniffs and Wednesday stops herself from stabbing her fork into the omega's throat when she sees those gorgeous blue eyes of enid's dilate

Don't look at anyone else, Wednesday wants to scream. You don't need them, I'm right here- But she can't do that, so she digs her nails into her palms as she slips into her thoughts

What happens in the diner is enough of a reminder that she needs to do this.

In the end of the weekend, Wednesday has finally concluded her research. The deleted user was right, she wouldn't be an omega but she sure will pass as one.

Her fertility will be the same but she can start producing the same addicting aroma and slick that entices all alpha's once she's done with the process

It sounds all well and dandy except it takes months to a whole year or two of constant dedication to get these results. It irates Wednesday but luckily, if the beta is reciprocating, the outcome is said to be all the more simpler, effective and overall efficient.

Wednesday couldn't stop a smile from growing as she eyes the last few words of her research.

if the beta in question was being bitched to the scent of one alpha in particular, then once the bitching was complete, both parties would become biologically attracted to one another’s scents and be driven to mate.

That was the confirmation wednesday needed, she would literally be made for Enid and Enid would have no choice but to realize it too once it was all over.

And finally, the best part:

all of the required steps could actually be accomplished without the alpha's participation or awareness

Good.

Anyways, degenerate Wednesday..? Love that, she can be such a creep and id like to build on it. If you wanna see more do send an ask! Aight thanks peace

Here's the continuation to this post where Wednesday gets what she wants

[sickficideas]

Spare fyolai and ranpoe HCs🤲

okay i can't promise this will be in character because i don't consume much fyolai content but i will try my best 🙏 also i assume ur asking for sickfic hcs if you meant something else pls correct me !! (also sorry this took so long omg)

also fyolai gets like a little nsfw bc theyre freaky like that 💖

ranpoe

- ranpo has never been Really sick a day in his life just out of sheer luck I'd imagine but those eating habits of his have to get him some solid stomachaches. and he is definitely complaining about it!!!

- he is asking (demanding) poe to rub his tummy when he doesn't feel good. poe is a good man and obliges every time. it always makes ranpo fall asleep 💖

- but he gets really bad food poisoning one day and ends the day like sobbing in poe's arms because he's so overwhelmed. the nausea, the actual act of throwing up, the cramping/soreness, burning in his throat, the headache from the dehydration is too much. poe is very sad about him being so upset and almost cries with him💔💔💔

- poe coming in clutch w the sweet factor though. "are you feeling alright dear?" "sweetheart, tell me where it hurts." "i need you to drink some water for me, my love."

- poe with the forehead kisses 😭😭😭💖 ranpo secretly loves them

- poe looks like a sickly man to me but i think he looks after his health very well...he has a personal doctor that regularly checks on him </3

- ranpo puts the pieces together quick but never says anything because he doesn't know if it's his place. he always has yosano on speed dial if he thinks something is wrong with poe however

- poe gets quiet when he's not feeling well but he always quietly seeks out ranpo's affection. he wants to hold hands and cuddle

- ranpo will always help him

fyolai

- nikolai is a dedicated emetophile for sure. making himself sick on purpose...he definitely likes puking. being sweaty and sore and being loud about it. fyodor thinks it's hot to watch.

- (thinking abt that official art) nikolai will also involve fyodor by force feeding him sweet things until he's nauseous and drooling

- nikolai is always the first to offer to stick his fingers down fyodor's throat if he mentions his stomach being sick

- fyodor canonically has anemia right LOL?? or is that a fandom delusion...lol regardless he does to me. he is elegantly fainting all the time. i bet he has a fancy fainting couch. i like the imagery of nikolai taking his arm when he stands up to prevent him from getting too dizzy from standing up too fast

- nikolai def likes seeing fyodor ill tho. sweat, drool, glassy eyes. fyodor catches him staring and says things like "take a picture, it lasts longer".

- nikolai watches him sleep and plays with his hair

- nikolai absolutely wants to be comforted if he doesn't feel good against his will though💖

[magnolia-sunrise]

i was wondering like. at what specific point could wolfgang be sure that bastien likes them afterall. i think iirc you might have mentioned they propositioned him pretty early on and kept a sense of intrigue anyways, i guess this could be a really specific moment in time? what signal made them go 'wait a minute this guy is into me afterall'

second specific question u mentioned wolf would have been in other relationships during these many years they spent w bastien. i guess these are multiple questions, would wolfs other partners notice that theyre somewhere else with their mind? would bastien be jealous or sad or just resign hinself to it? would wolf want for bastien to be jealous or is it more like. happenstance. does this make sense asking like this??

ahh thank you so much for sending this! it is a rare treat to be able to talk about this backstory stuff a bit more <3

lets see, first question, to start off i wrote out a sort of timeline of their acquaintance over 8 years in this post . you remember right, Wolfgang propositions him when they actually get to meet for the second time and talk for a while. they can tell he is kind and selfless in a way that many humans aren't, and also, more importantly, he's hot (and he did save their life and they're very grateful). Bastien politely declines as he's in a comitted relationship with Matteo at that point already (and still very much in love with him), but its fair to say theres a lot of mutual physical attraction, and it's very fun for Wolfgang to flirt with him and tease him through the years as they grow closer.

Bastien falls in love first, but he's also become very good at hiding those feelings and putting them away into a drawer somewhere far away in his heart. iirc i haven't talked about what would've been *The* moment for Wolf - they have an affection for him, but i think it takes them a few months to catch up on the fact there's something more, that his touch is softer, more tender perhaps.

but there is this event that happens early on when the actual story would kick off, around year 7/8 of them knowing each other, when they witness something really gruesome and in their attempt to follow the perpetrators they get hurt, but its significantly worse on their mental state - they can't unsee the things they saw and they grieve the lives they could've saved if they were faster. in that state they drag themself to the clinic late in the night and only Bastien is there. he takes care of their wounds as usual, except nothing is really 'as usual' anymore, and they can't stop sobbing through it. it's probably the most vulnerable they've ever been with him at that point. Bastien doesn't come home that night, he stays with them and holds them without asking questions. he knows he shouldn't but he can't bear to send them away. from that time i think Wolf finally understood just how much Bastien loves them, even though he tries to hide it. (he is even so good at hiding it that Élise tries to talk some sense into Wolfgang and that they shouldn't pine after him because it's a lost cause)

second question -- this is a bit tricky because its my fault for being the unreliable narrator here who hyperfixates on the "main love interest" in Bastien, without showing much of other people in either of their lives. in the early years, Bastien is not necessarily the most important person in their life at all - he's intriguing, sure, and he's attractive and they become genuine friends but that takes years, and Wolfgang knows other interesting and hot people they fuck and date in the meantime. one of their previous partners they actually meet at the clinic (another android patient). they also maintain a kind of fun friends with paid benefits relationship with Élise. so i would say they very much pay their full attention to whoever they're with, and their primary intent is definitely not concerned with thinking about what Bastien might feel about it. at least initially.

does Bastien feel jealous? oh yes, even though i don't think he would be able to identify that emotion correctly. more than once he sees them making out with someone or other in the alley behind the clinic and he can't help but feel - well - he gets angry at himself mostly, full of jealousy and envy, and then pushes it all down. he probably thinks he deserves to feel miserable and guilty.

when they get to the point they're both aware of their mutual feelings, Wolfgang doesn't really even have time to pursue any relationships. at most they fuck their friends, but the emotional mess that's between them and Bastien just keeps getting messier and more desperate, and they don't want to seriously involve anyone else in it. it's bad enough that Bastien still lives and sleeps with Matteo. in a moment of spiteful weakness maybe they would try to make him feel jealous of them sleeping with someone else, but all it does is just make them both more miserable so there's not really a point to it - it wouldn't change Bastien's decision. their worst fear is losing him as a friend, they can't push too much and they can't leave either. so for months they're both trapped in this mutual misery of yearning and lingering touches and things left unsaid until it all boils over

[thefandom-casserole]

Episode 49 Notes-

Heheheh I had a snow day so I got to listen early!!!!!!!!!!!

THE INTRO SONG OMG

We are winning with the dndads music lately hehehe

“Like there’s a Druid in my mind saying it’s gonna be oak” SOBBING

Oak this is a bop actually

Holy shit there were so many things bad that happened to normal lately 😭 

They’re in the past!!!!!! Oh my goddddddd

Taylor’s Teen Fact: Taylor was the runner up of the Teen High Teen of the Year award (which Margarita Pizza won). Taylor is a very good cup stacker (third place in a competition)

We forget that Taylor is canonically the most popular kid 

Freddie’s facts are always the craziest of all time. I love it

Linc’s Teen Fact: Linc had to do things other than soccer playing so Marco and Grant got him into artsy stuff. Of course he only would pain/sculpt soccer type things. So he decided to start selling them on Next Door (with an account called Foot King). Marco and Grant took him off of the app. He’s a good painter basically

Normal’s Teen Fact: Normal always keeps his hot glue gun on him

Scary’s Teen Fact: Scary doesn’t have a New Years Resolution because she decided it was too resolute (too firm, too definite). She wants to be able to choose whether or not to do something 

Daddy Fact: Anthony’s goal is to write a porn thing and he was reached out to by a porn website to write for them. He was gifted a care package (picture as you will)

He’s already written the script 😭 

OH SHIT TAYLOR AND SCARY AREN’T WITH THEM

Ooohh AU where they ARE the four horseman of the apocalypse 

THE DOLPHIN CULT YAYYYYYYYYYYAGAJAHHSJDND

Sitcom staring the Porpy and Flippy: Cop sidekicks

NO DOOD HAS DOODLERIZED EVERYONEEEEEE

Well Willy did but whatever

Screw Willy

Grill Master the Dolphin!!!!!!! Ayyyyyy

Dang Willy is God

They’re in a five person (well four person now) marriage don’t judge the dolphins!!!!

Awww they’re only like. Fifteen. 

Heh Glenn Close/Jodie Foster (a good guy) in charge of Hell, Willy Stampler (a bad guy) in charge of Heaven

Yoooo wait the FBI is apart of the Hell now 

Lark still hates Henry omg

Sparrow!!! Omg 

Normal and Scary are so similar omg omg omg

Damn Good Omens much

What is it with Willy getting at the Oaks?

OH IS IT BECAUSE THEY HAVE PART OF DOOD IN THEM!?!?!?

“Brother” AYYY THEYRE BACK

The codependents of all time

HENRY NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

This dumb spell my goodness I love their debate

Why are they so set on killing Henry 😭 

Oh only 49 damage that’s not that bad 

TAYLOR BREAKS LARKS ANCLE OMG

Scary noooooooo

SPIDER BOIZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Scary’s gonna die 😭 😭 😭 😭 

Taylors such an ass omg

Scary got 44 damage 

“I say no once in six years of podcasting” 

TEHYRE ON FUREEEEEBSJAJAHIWIW

SCARY AND HENRY A DUO I DIDNT KNOW I NEEDED

Lark and Sparrow make me so unwell omg

NO LARK LETS GO OF SPARROW NOOOO

Begging for Lark to have a whole thing about Sparrow with Normal

No one catches Lark 😭 

Taylor is so funny omg

TAYLOR WITH SPARROW OMG

They seriously are having season one vibes I missed this so much omg

Nooo that was such a good transition 

Taylor having his own mini adventure is because they played a Taylor Swift song for their intro

CASSANDRA OH NO

TAYLOR JS GOING TO KILL WILLY IF HE DOES ANYTHING ELSE TO HIS MOM

This whole Taylor thing is giving off BIG Leviathan Fabian vibes with Chungle Down Bim

YOOO THE MARRIAGE THING OMG STRIKES AGAIN

Please say this works 

Roll high

Ohh a 12

LINC JUST PRAYED TO WILLY

Voicemail box 😭 

Of course Taylor is going to find his name 

OMG WAIT FREDDIE’S PLAN WAS LITERALLY OREDICTED BY SOMEONE ON TUMBLR I SWEAR

I DUNNO WHO

BUT MAY APPOLO’S VISION BE UPON YOU OR WHATEVER

Nooooo and it’d be easier for Taylor too because HIS MOM MARRIED WILLY OMG OMG

HIS LAST NAME TECHNICALLY COULD BE STAMPLER MUCH EASIER NOW BECAUSE OF THAT

SCARYA ND HENRY YAYAYAYYAYAYAYAYAYSGHAHWHSHSHSHSVSAHWJHAHSB

Henry stopppppppp you’re messing with Scary :cccccccc

Nooo scary still has the hat omg oh dear

Oh dear Willy’s God now he could probably control someone’s mind through their sleepppp

Oh god I hate Barry so much. He sucked so much I hate him

AHHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHSHHAHSHHSHSH SCARY BEING A SOCCER OEROSN OMG OSBAKAJSH

Taylor squints so hard that someone dies 😭 

AYYY THATS CANON

I wonder if he’s gonna get the original daddies as well as the Kiddads 

Scary’s pulling what Riz did with Biz ayyyy

Aww that would’ve been sick if he believed her

NO NO DONT TELL HER SHE WAS LIKE YOU FUCK YOU WILLY

FUCKING GET HIM SCARY GET HIS ASS GET EM

Scary just wants attention :ccccc

“Good luck” ANTHONY THAT HAD NO BUSINESS BEING SO OMINOUS OMG

Noooo remembering the thing with the cheese :ccc

I miss early season two

NO THATS WHERE EVERYRHING WITH HERMIE HAPPENED AYLGHHHHHHSVSHHSHS

“YOU BITCH” omg normal 😭 

“Give me an L” “You’ve had enough Ls” “I’ll give you one of mine”

No the way it fits the intro

AHHH NORMAL USING HIS CHEER TO CHEER UP LINC

This episode is making me giddy omg /pos

Linc is getting so sad this is worryinggggg. He’s acting like Grantttttt

This whole eye thing is seriously the math questions on my tests 

A happy normal is something I’ve missed so so much

I think literally all of these kids (except maybe Taylor) have a guilt complex (Scary/Willy, Normal/Code Purple, Linc/im not quite sure)

DARRYL AUYYYYYAYAYAYYAYAHAHABBSHSJSJS

JODIE AND GLENN YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYABSJAHWH

Omg Jodie and Glenn together 😭 

WIAT WAIT OKG WAIT

THE THING THAT MAKES THEM BELIEVE JN SHIT

THE WHOLE THING WITH THE CLOSE FAMILY DID THAT FOR TAYLOR

AND HE GOT THE PERSUASION THING

DOES THAT MEAN THATLL HAPPEN FOR THE OTHER TEENS WHEN THEYRE THING IS COMPLETED

ITS LIKE WHEN IN FH THEY GIT TO REROLL A STAT AFTER SOOHMORE YEAR

Scary looks like Larry!!

Omg Freddie is genuinely so smart omg

HAMILTON AYYYYYYYY

Yam ya

I’m gonna use that

He had a flying spell wowwww

REVERSE GRAVITY AUAGAHHAJAHAHHAHAHJW

OhhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHH

Will and me both man

Larry is so cool omg

Dood nooooooo 

RONNNNAHGAHAHAHAHHSHS

FUCK YOU WILLY

FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOUHAGSJSHHAHAAHAHS

Mfer admits that Ron posed a threatttttt

Honey badger waits for no one 

I’m gonna start using that too

GO BETH OMG 

Willy likes the science kid oh my god I’m gonna sob

Larry gives off church camp vibes

Willy’s doing the spaghetti thing 😭 

OMG OMG

WILLY TAYLOR IS GOING TO KILL YOU IF YOI HURY CASSANDRA PIOE THAT HOLY SHIT

“You’d be a lot prettier if you smiled Cassandra” GET HIS ASS TAYLOR GET. HIS. ASS.

You know I hated Willy before 

But this is a whole new fucking level 

Awww that’s so sweet at the end <33

AHHAHAHAHHAHA THIS EPISODE MAN

I don’t know how I’m gonna be able to wait for the next episode ahhh

IVE LISTENED TO THE ALBUM BUT OMG IM SO EXCITED TO HEAR THE ONE THEYRE RELEASING TO ADVERTISE IT

I’m betting it’s either the Potatoe one or Dead and Gone

Hmmmmm

January 30th!!

Oh screw off siri

AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAIT IS DEAD AND GONE

YAYAYAYAYYAYAYAAYAYAYYAYAYYA

THIS EPISODE IS MT ABSOKUTE FAVORUTE THIS SEASON

[bluiex]

Grian fell out of bed, startling Jellie who skittered away. Scar laughed.

“How long have you been awake?!” Grian complained.

“Come on, I never catch you off guard usually!”

Grian couldn’t help but smile.

Yeah, he was happy here.

“So, what’s concorp doing today?” Grian led.

“We’re…- Oh! I’m not telling you anything!”

Grian snickered, “Worth a shot.”

--

Before things could continue, Grian cut in speaking vex, "Scar, I think I might be in love with you."

Scar, adorably, hid behind his daughter and giggled, "I would hope so, it would be embarrassing if you weren't."

"Very embarrassing, considering we're married."

"With a baby and everything, Gri! If you weren't in love with me I don't know what I'd do."

--

“Breakfast?”

“Want some?” Scar grinned.

Grian rolled his eyes, but still sat beside Scar, still leaned against his side, still rested a wing half open over Scar’s back.

“I don’t, actually.” Grian yawned.

“Shame. It’s good.”

“I’ll take your word for it. Timmy’s visiting today, don’t forget.”

“I didn’t forget.” Scar said, far too quickly. “Tell me when he arrives.”

Grian laughed and shifted, trying to cuddle even closer to Scar. As if that was possible.

--

"It's late."

Grian cracked an eye open. The clock ticked. It was only half past eight. "But cuddles."

"We have work."

Grian groaned. "Or we could call in sick."

Scar hummed. "So you think my latest idea will work?"

As if by magic, Grian was wide awake. He kissed Scar. "Not a chance in hell. You'll see."

--

“This could kill you.”

“Oh.” Scar looked down for a minute, and then back up at Grian. "Could it?"

He couldn't help but laugh, he married this ridiculous man. "Yes." And god did it ease the tension that even now Scar was being himself. 

"Well, that's not good."

--

I like writing them being silly together -@scitties-enjoyer

ajihbgfdhj THESE ARE SO CUTE *sobbing* I love them so much ty for sharing this qoq theyre so great

[weedpoop]

tell me about "machete order: an alternate analysis on prequels and heroic origins" (WHAT a title holy shit) + one dealer's choice! i love ur fics i think theyre awesome ESPECIALLY when theyre weird im sorry im so behind on reading everything uve posted...

HIIIII i love YOUR fics and i am so happy to talk to you about trobed always. let me tell you about trobed....

machete order !! so the title is based off of this the concept of this au was that troy got his football scholarship but dropped out, joined a dance troupe where he met britta, who never went back to college or anything like that. so abed and jeff still met each other at greendale and became friends, abed still moved out to LA eventually, became a filmmaker and developed a bit of a cult following there is a Lot going on here and i could probably just like actually post the story or something. but.

basically ...... jeff meets britta on reddit and is trying to set abed up with troy as an excuse to get closer to her abed is hesitant at first, esp because troy is a fan of his work and this makes things slightly awkward for him, but they end up hanging out and watching star wars and kinda falling in love. pretty fuckin gay ! here's a snippet from the second chapter -

When Abed pulled up to Troy’s hotel the next morning, the first thing to catch his eye was a familiar blue Lexus sitting under a palm tree. The second, crouched beneath it, was a black kitten.

“Whoa,” Troy said. “Stop, stop! Is that a cat?” 

He scrambled to unbuckle before Abed could park.

“Troy,” he said. “You shouldn’t engage with random cats. What if it has rabies?”

“There’s no way something that cute has rabies.”

Abed sighed and called Jeff. His number popped onto the console screen and rang twice before his voice crackled through, thick and slow like he hadn’t slept.

“What do you want?”

“Hi.” Abed watched Troy, from his peripheral, lower the passenger side window. “Can you bring a blanket or towel down here? There’s a cat under your car.”

“What? Abed, where—”

“Be down in a sec!” Britta shouted. She coughed loudly and very much into the phone, then hung up.

Troy was making clicking noises with his mouth now, waving.

“Heeey, kitty!” he called. “C’mere!” 

Abed put the car in park and shut it off. Navigating traffic was like performing surgery—or so he assumed, as a non-surgeon—and each time he still had to take a moment to collect himself afterward. Another difference between Colorado and California: the roads here were designed to make you slowly go insane.

“You good?” Troy asked. Abed shook himself and faced him, feeling far away.

“Yeah.” He took a deep breath in. “Yeah, I’m good. I hope Jeff and Britta got breakfast.”

“Me too,” Troy said. “I’m starving.”

He turned back to the cat.

“It’s so little and lost and alone, Abed,” he said. “Where do you think its mom went?”

Abed hummed in consideration. “Could’ve been attacked by a wild animal. Or run over by a car. Los Angeles is full of things that could kill or otherwise harm a cat.”

Troy whipped his head around to stare him down, eyes wide. He made a high sound in his throat and shook his head rapidly. Then he burst into tears.

“Or—” Abed tried to think. “Or maybe the kitten had an undiagnosed developmental disorder that put a strain on its family, so the mother cat divorced the father cat to pursue greater things.”

Troy hiccuped through sobs. 

“That’s ridiculous,” he cried. “A cat would never sit through a divorce hearing. It’d just get bored and leave!”

“True.” Abed folded his hands in his lap. “Sorry.”

He wasn’t good at navigating emotions. Or interacting with people. Or comforting them.

Growing up, his parents had shoved him into waiting room after waiting room like if they let enough strangers in white coats poke and prod they’d find the glitch in his code, the vacancy he carried that in everyone else was filled with the Right Things To Say and Right Things To Do. The night before his mom left, he woke up in the dark and found her at the kitchen table, head in her hands as she cried. He wanted to ask what was wrong. But even then, he knew. 

He looked at Troy, this stranger in his car, and wondered once again what to do.

A knock at the window startled him.

Jeff, red-eyed and disheveled, stood outside with a fuzzy blanket. His voice was muffled through the glass. “Hey, jackass!” 

Abed squinted against the sun as he lowered the window.

“Be quiet,” he whispered. “You’ll scare it off.”

Britta appeared from behind Jeff with a bowl of water.

“Yeah, Jeff!” she yelled. “Be quiet!”

Ignoring them, Troy opened his door and slid out slowly. He called out in a soft voice.

At first, the cat didn’t move. It stood its ground and watched. Troy crept over, inch by inch, and finally, once he was near it, held out a hand. “Hey little guy,” he whispered, “or gal. Hey, hey, it’s okay.”

It blinked at him with its huge, all-knowing eyes. Despite its youth, the cat had clearly seen some shit. 

Abed held his breath as it approached Troy, one paw at a time like the ground might explode. The moment its nose met his hand was pulled straight from a Hallmark movie. The good kind, with the right balance of plot and emotion—not one of those cheesy Christmas movies with a conventionally attractive yet comically stupid all-white cast.

Anyway, everyone else also held their breath, and ceased other internal functions too.

“Would you look at that,” Jeff said. “I think it likes him.”

A few feet away, Troy wrapped his arms around the kitten. It snuggled into him, purring.

“Yeah.” Abed’s chest warmed as he watched. “I think it does.”

Troy spoke up suddenly. “Hey, guys. I think we should probably get this thing to a vet. Its eye is all crusty and weird looking.”

Britta set the bowl on the ground and rushed over. 

“I hope it’s not infected,” she said. “My friend died from an eye infection that went to her brain. Completely killed the vibes at Burning Man.”

Troy looked close to tears again.

“Hey Jeff,” Abed said. “Why don’t you and Britta take it to the vet? Troy and I will cat-proof the hotel room in the meantime.”

Jeff’s face lit up.  “Good idea.” He turned to Britta with a shit-eating grin. “Let’s go save a life.”

***

okay and for my choice..... ermmmm environmental effects of human behavior is one of my favorite wips that ill probably never post. it is pretty ... explicit so heres just the first part of it

“Man,” Jeff says, looking up from his phone for the first time in an hour, “those twins are seriously hot. I wonder what classes they’re in.”

Britta follows his gaze past the windows, out to the library, where two identical blonde women are browsing shelves near the water fountains.

“I think one of them is in my psych class,” she says. “I’m not sure which.”

Pierce turns to see what all the fuss is about. 

“Well, you could probably use my help.”

“Try someone more your league or century,” Jeff shoots back. “I think I can handle this one on my own.”

“Or!” Annie’s grinning in the way that means something terrible is about to happen. “Or we could set them up with Troy and Abed! How cute would that be?” “C’mon, Annie,” says Jeff. “Why would Troy and Abed want to bang a pair of hot twins? They’re too busy playing in cardboard boxes and giving each other prostate orgasms to hang out with us half the time.”

“Jeff, ew!” Annie shrieks. “That is so inappropriate!”

“And not at all condoned by the Bible,” adds Shirley.

“There’s nothing wrong with looking out for your health,” Britta says. “Did you know one in eight men in the US will be diagnosed with prostate cancer? It’s only gonna get worse now that the ocean’s filled with plastic.” Troy’s eyes go wide.

“What are you guys talking about?” he asks, dropping his book. “And why do I feel like I missed out on a class that everyone else already took?”

“They’re talking about gay sex,” says Pierce.

“What?” Troy asks. “Why?”

“They think we’re too busy having it to get girlfriends,” Abed explains. “Which isn’t the reason. It’s mostly the costumes and our dedication to a good homage that puts the ladies off.”

Troy nods with a sad little sigh. “It’s true.”

“Yeah,” Jeff says as he turns back to his phone. “I’m sure that’s why.”

–

“Hey, Abed?” Troy asks that night. “Do you know what was up with Jeff earlier?”

Abed glances away from the TV. “Aside from what’s normally up with him? No.”

“Like,” Troy starts, waiting for his brain to load, “the stuff with the twins was really weird, and kinda scary. And now I don’t know what I’m gonna do about the oceans.”

“I’m not sure there’s much you can do.”

Troy looks down. 

“Damn,” he whispers.

“I know,” Abed says. “The inevitable climate apocalypse is a lot to take in. I think that’s probably why people like Jeff lash out so much. It’s a way to cope with the slow spiral down the drain of eternity.”

Troy nods. “That makes sense. Is that why he was making such a big deal about us being pro-state?”

“No,” Abed says through a bite of popcorn. “Well, yes. Sort of. Humanity’s demise turns some people into heroes and others into monsters.” Instead of elaborating on Jeff’s weird issues, he points at the screen and says simply, “Let’s keep watching Kickpuncher.”

“Cool,” Troy says. 

He pulls his knees up to his chest in a mirror of Abed. It’s late and they should probably be asleep, but these moments when Annie’s in bed and it’s just the two of them are his favorite. He feels special. Like he could tell Abed anything right now.

“It just annoys me sometimes,” he finds himself saying absently. “When Jeff and other people say that stuff about us, I mean. Firstly, it’s none of their business why girls think we’re weird, and it’s—it’s just stupid, like, I don’t even really get what he was talking about. It makes me feel like an idiot.”

“Hm?” Abed turns to him. “Oh.” He pauses, realization setting over his face with a raised brow. “Really?”

Troy huffs, sliding down in his chair.

“I mean, I get the general idea. But. “ He shrugs. “They don’t exactly teach you this stuff at bible camp, man.”

Abed nods. “I get it. I guess I just thought otherwise based on some things you’ve said before.” He pauses while chewing another kernel. “Then again, it’s not like they teach this stuff in school either.”

Troy folds his arms. His chest feels hot. Like he’s—like he needs to be defensive, or like there’s something he’s missing or doesn’t understand.

“Well, how do you know about all this?”

“I have a computer with internet access,” Abed says. “And a general idea of how human anatomy works.”

“I took anatomy last semester.” Troy’s face is burning. “I just—I mean, Abed, can you show me? I feel like I’m missing out on something here.”

“Sure,” Abed says. “We can watch some videos later.”

“I meant, like—” He glances up at him, then back down. “You and me, if you wanted to.” 

Blinking, Abed pauses Kickpuncher and turns to him. In the low lighting, his eyes look dark, almost black.

“Are you sure?” he asks. “Some people might find that a little awkward.”

Troy shrugs again with a small laugh.

“I don’t know. Not me,” he says. “I trust you. Like I said, I just wanna get it, and Britta really freaked me out with the whole cancer thing.”

Abed nods. 

“Your health is important.” He’s silent for a moment, thinking, then nods again. “We’ll need to wait for a night Annie’s out of the apartment.”

“Okay.” Troy’s stomach does a little flip. “Awesome. Thanks, man. Do you think I should ask her?”

“No. She has her book club Friday, so let’s try to plan for after seven.”

Troy nods. His brain feels like a circuit board drenched in water, broken and sparking, and he doesn’t know why.

“Cool,” he says.

–

The next morning, Abed’s making cereal in the kitchen when Troy unzips the blanket fort and steps out. He totally doesn’t stare at his fingers around the spoon or the lean muscle of his arms in his Star Wars t-shirt. Instead, Troy very normally sits at the table and counts the spirals in the wood.

“You want some?”

He jumps and almost falls out of his chair.

“Abed,” he gasps. “Don’t do that to me.”

“Do what? Make you cereal? Fine, I’m a terrible roommate.” Abed takes a bite of Lucky Charms and sits across the table. “We should get ready soon. I think our biology exam’s this morning.”

“Ugh,” Troy says. “I didn’t study at all.”

Abed hums. “Me neither. I’ll have to cheat off of Garrett again.”

“Man, I don’t wanna keep doing that. We’re definitely gonna get caught one of these times.”

“Hm, probably,” Abed says. “Until then, we should try to be as covert as possible.”

Troy nods. So far, there are 14 big spirals and 10 little ones, some of which are inside the bigger ones like little Russian dolls but, like, if Russian dolls were a wooden table they got from a guy in Denver who claimed to sell possessed furniture.

“By the way,” Abed says, “since it’s Thursday, we should stop at the store later. I’m pretty sure I’m out of lube and we’ll want some for tomorrow.” “Okay,” Troy chokes out. “Yeah, let’s definitely do that.”

He loses count. 

–

“Can you go in?” Troy asks, stuffing his hands in the pocket of his hoodie. The street outside the corner store is busy and the wind bites at his skin.

“Let’s go in together,” Abed says. “What if you get hit by a car?”

“Then I’m rich and we get to buy a mansion in Hollywood.” Abed shakes his head. “Most bodily injury claims are settled for under a couple thousand dollars. You’d be lucky getting a studio apartment down the street.”

“I hate society,” Troy says darkly. 

Abed nods, then points.

“Agreed. Let’s hurry before we get mugged again.” 

He holds the door open and follows as Troy enters. Troy blinks under the fluorescents, feeling impossibly lost in this stupid store he’s been in, like, a hundred times. He has no clue what he’s looking for. 

Abed, however, is brushing past him to the third aisle near the back, gaze intent. Once he stops in the pharmacy section, he looks down at Troy and squints.

“Are you allergic to glycerin?”

“No?” Troy says. “I think?”

“Cool.” Abed’s voice is low when he speaks again, like he’s divulging top-secret info. “We’ll probably want to go with something water-based. A lot of people like silicone because it lasts longer, but the extra coating means it can cause friction burns and it’s annoying to clean up. Plus, we can always just use more if we need it.”

“Okay, awesome,” Troy says. In contrast to the brisk cold outside, it’s weirdly hot in here. He stares at his shoes to try to cool his face off. When he looks up, Abed is still shuffling through the row of tubes. His fingers are so long. 

“Found it,” he says after a minute. “This one’s good. I think you’ll like it.”

“Will it give me special powers?” Troy asks. “Or make me see new colors?”

“Maybe.” Abed wiggles his brows. “Let me know, because I’ve been meaning to learn transmutation and if this is the key that unlocks it, I’d like to stock up.”

Troy grimaces. “Man, if it transmutates me I’m gonna be pissed. I have library books I still need to return.”

Abed hums in agreement and reaches into his pocket. His eyes widen.

“I forgot my wallet,” he whispers, then shoves the bottle in his shoe. “I’m going to run.”

Troy nods.

“On three.”

–

When they get back, Annie’s still at study group, which—Troy checks the clock—doesn’t end for another twenty minutes, then she’s picking up pizza, and that’s another… Well, he’s not very good at math, but she won’t be home for at least an hour. The lights are dim and it’s quiet as Abed un-stuffs the lube from his shoe and sets it on the table.

“I need you to do a few things for me,” he says.

“Whatever you want. You know that.” Troy flops onto the couch while Abed continues, now sitting at the table to remove his shoes.

“Tomorrow night, after school, if you could take one of your famously long showers that’d be good. Really get in there, if you know what I mean.” 

Troy nods. “I can do that.”

“Also, try to avoid any processed, spicy, or oily foods for the next twenty-four hours.”

Troy frowns. “But I wanted pizza.”

“I’ll eat salad with you,” Abed offers, standing. 

“Um, have you been replaced by a clone?”

Abed shakes his head. 

“I don’t think so,” he says. “But I’m not sure I’d know if I was.”

“That’s scary, man. Imagine living your whole life as someone else and you don’t even know it.” Troy gasps. “Am I Obama?”

“I hope so.”

Abed joins Troy on the couch and reclines his head, thinking. His adam's apple bobs as he breathes in and Troy does try not to stare, he really does. It’s just hard, is all. 

“Hey,” he says quietly, “Abed.”

“Hm?” 

Abed turns his head and meets his eyes, looking down, lids low. Troy feels dizzy—someone should check the carbon monoxide alarm.

“Since Annie won’t be home for awhile—”

The front door bursts open. Annie, pizza in-hand, storms in wearing a thousand-yard stare.

“That was traumatizing. Pierce lost another bet to Jeff, and—I really don’t want to get into specifics, but I can’t look at trombones the same way ever again.”

Sighing, she throws the pizza on the table and removes her jacket. Then she pauses. Troy feels his stomach jump into his throat as she picks up the little tube and inspects it.

“What’s this?” 

“Oh.” Abed blinks, sitting up straight. “That’s mine.”

“Oh!” Annie gasps and goes red. She sets it back down. “Sorry, I didn’t realize…”

“It’s okay. I should’ve put that away.” He glances at Troy before standing and taking it, then disappears into the blanket fort.

“Well,” Annie tries, “good for Abed.” Her smile is so forced it looks painful. She opens the pizza box, glancing at Troy. “That’s… not gonna make anything awkward for you guys, is it?”

“What?” Troy asks. “Of course not. Why would it?”

“It’s just that,” she starts,  “historically, you may have been known to get a little… I mean, just a tiny, tiny bit jealous when Abed, you know, pays attention to other people? But—but hey, good for you! And him!”

“Annie, why would I be jealous? Did they do something to your brain?” He sure feels like his is breaking. Probably due to lack of pizza. 

“What’d they do to Annie’s brain?” Abed locks the door to the blanket fort with a quiet zip. “Oh, that smells good.”

“I got extra pepperoni on one half,” she says, beaming. “And extra cheese on the other half. Just like you guys wanted!”

“Thanks, Annie,” Troy grits out. “But Abed and I are actually—”

“Trying to eat healthy,” Abed finishes. “We’ve been overdoing it with junk food lately. Troy’s been getting these pains in his stomach… It’s bad.” 

“Oh my god, Troy,” Annie gasps, turning to face him. Troy shoots a look at Abed, who shrugs, eyes wide. “Are you okay? Do you need to see a doctor?”

“Nope,” he says. “Nope, I’m—I’ll be fine. Abed’s gonna take good care of me.”

“I am.” Abed nods. “Let’s have something else tonight. Maybe we’ll save the pizza for tomorrow.”

Troy sighs. “Salad, anyone?”

[stackslip]

chainsaw man 112 thoughts below cut bc there is so much to unpack here

asa is so sad about the broken sword/uniform.... baby i’m so sorry :((((

“i don’t know who that woman is” YORU YOU ARE EITHER DUMBER THAN I THOUGHT OR A LIAR SHE HAS YOUR EYESSSSS

student council slash devil hunting club DMLXDS i lvoe the ongoing animanga tradition of student councils being obscenely powerful

it is EXTREMELY funny of fujimoto to drop a hell of a mystery last chapter, leading to a week of speculation and despair and everyone thinking it’ll be the main mystery fr this part, only to be like “oh yeah the imposter is this random dude who just like openly calls himself chainsaw man”. king of anticlimax. love it

i mean i suspect there are like ten imposters running around thanks to the powers of justice and/or coolgirl right there (famine? who is also justice?) but still. extremely funny

g-d asa looks so tired of yoru’s loser shtick this is so funny i love their relationship. pathetic loser teenage girl and an even more pathetic devil possessing her

“as long as you’re inside me, not only will i be miserable but the people around me will be too” sobs cries owwww i get a feeling that the day they do separate it’s gonna hurt like hell even tho rn asa hates her (understandably)

HAHAHAHAHA THIS FACE SHE IS SOOOOOO

the chicken stomping thing...... my heart hurts. g-d everyone is gonna end up miserable and making terrible choices and doing terrible things. i love it

“i’d rather kill a human than a cat” 1) parallels, again 2) that’s fair and also v funny

the fact that creating a weapon involves guilt is so cool bc it’s the contrary of what justice has been doing--granting powers in exchange for the students/hosts believing their every action is utterly righteous. to become stronger asa has to understand that she is doing something heinous and cruel and choose to do it anyway. and she decides to do it.......... rhghhhhhhhh

obsessed with this set of panels and the cat LITERALLY being larger/more important in asa’s vision than the ant-like humans below her....... g-d i hope fujimoto sticks to giving her a villain arc bc it’s genuinely fasctinating stuff

asa seeing denji and immediately going “yeah he sounds good to kill. he’s an idiot and a loser but he sounds like a good person.” augh.

AND THEN IT TURNS OUT DENJI HAS BEEN SCAMMING HOMELESS PEOPLE FOR MONEY FJKSDXDKQLZKLX DENJIIIIIII i love my asshole son

but also............. why aren’t people at school allowed to take on part-time jobs when half of them are orphans and can’t provide for themselves. what the fuck. and denji has to take care of a little sister AND like eight dogs and a cat too??

asa’s self deprecation is so delicious i love a self hating pathetic loser who’s also really tragic and sad and clearly on a terrible terrible path

denji is catching all the cat comparison nows. did fujimoto get a cat and say dog people are out cats are IN

[cowboy AHHHHHHH dot mp4]

literal devil on her shoulder........... and thinking of yuko..................... augh

AHHHH THE FACT THAT THEYRE BOTH IN SHADOW AND SHE CATCHES HIM RIGHT AS HES ABOUT TO STEP IN LIGHT AND THE WHOLE CONVO TAKES PLACE IN THAT SHADOW RIGHT BEFORE THE LIGHT oh fujimoto is gonna go for tragedy alright

in general i’m really loving the way the conversation is framed i love how awkward this is how harrowing it is from asa how denji softens i love this so much i love that both protags are traumatized loser teens who have lived unfathomably tragic lives and it’s gonna get so much worse and they don’t understand one another but they are SO similar too.....

UGHHHH ASA IS FEELING REAL GUILT AT THIS AND THINKING SHES GONNA KILL A SAD LOSER TEEN............... 

and like. oh man someone earlier said that denji points her out as the girl who hates chainsaw man. and here she is coming up to it asking him out on a date. a girl who hates CHAINSAW MAN but wants to ask HIM out. it’s like. everything he’d hoped and wanted. someone who wants him and sees him and not chainsaw man. and yet he responds in such a shy way when in part 1 he’d have been ecstatic........ genuinely shocked that it would happen at all

sadder still is that she really isn’t seeing him as a person at all and is just aiming for chainsaw man augh. ow.

and really what asa is seeing is a way out of this entire nightmare a way to save yuko (WHOS ALREADY DEAD AAHHHHHHHHHHH) a way to end this entire pantomime and attempt to reclaim a normal life all for the cost of this one loser kid whose name she doesn’t even know but who is so much like her and yuko and augh. augh AUGH

g-d it’s like twenty pages and there is so much to unpack here

[song-tam]

do you have any good kam fics/oneshot recommendations?

hi wait im so so sorry that this took me like. two months to answer. it was stuck in my drafts and i just kept. forgetting abt it but it’s here now so !!! hopefully that makes up for it skdhsgsks

also i actually did a similar post/fic list like this a while back here (thank you for finding the link aves i owe you one), and while i haven’t really seen any new content for them in the meantime there’s still a good few!!

let’s not lose ourselves by glitter_demon (@fey-glitter) - ngl more of a tam character study than it is kam, but there are elements of them in the drabble. i’d still highly recommend it even w/o too much kam bc i rarely see tam characterization in fanon done as well as this one and i’m being soo normal about it

before the night ends by handpulledsilver (@soryasongsaa) - OKAY can i just say. ive reread this fucker more times than i can count it’s one of my favorites ever. its a sort of companion fic to ink’s other fic (scared of the sun, recced that one in the other list), an exes to lovers story, plenty of feels and emotions that have me on the floor sobbing. def worth a read !!

the lie between your teeth (the cut that always bleeds) by handpulledsilver - yes this is another ink fic and yes it makes me rot. angst galore theyre exes but they dont go back to being lovers. artist keefe sencen though so i think that makes up for it. also conan gray ref in the title?? bonus points for that

Có nhớ tôi không? by celestiials (@theogony) - this one’s like. keefe and tam are rivals in the music world then they become roommates to work on a project together (oh my god they were roommates…) and to no one’s surprise they fall in love !! i LOVE this fic also shoutout to aru’s coding skills bc they slayed the creators style thing i could never

Drama Club by kingkrakie - kam band au HELLO??? author was after my own heart fr PLUS it’s given inspired and if you haven’t seen the anime then. that doesn’t mean much but either way i LOVED this fic very wholesome very adorable i need fluff in my life i am a simple man

the string connecting us by @that-glasses-dog - okay if there’s anything i love more than band aus it’s soulmate aus. red string of fate first meetings and at fucking exillium too hello??? im being very normal over this fic i love reading it every single time i see it pop up in the keefe/tam tag akshdgdsks

and uh. that’s kinda it for now? i WISH i had more recs but unfortunately there is a finite number of kam fics in this fandom (well. on ao3 i assume wattpad has more but i don’t Go There) but i’m hoping these will be enough to hold you over for now !! worst case scenario you’re welcome to try my ao3 and see if anything catches your fancy i’ve written a few kam fics myself but as of now. i hope you enjoy these as much as i did they’re all bangers !!

(oh for the record if anyone has anything they’d like to add or any recs at all please share i’m begging i need good kam fics too ajshsgsisks)

[orchidyoonkook]

I am going to seriously withdraw my kisses 💀 AHSJDHFHSHD YOU'RE SO, SO SWEET AND PRECIOUS, AND I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU ACTUALLY WENT AHEAD AND STARTED WORKING ON IT 😭❤️ LEMME SAVE UP RN AND I MEAN IT 🥺

No, thank YOU for writing this masterpiece, because yeah, I can't say more, you summed it up perfectly, it's beautiful to find a safe space in another person and

I LOVE YOU SO MUUUUUUCH 😭❤️ ok i lied about my kisses but still 😤 I'M WATCHING YOU, I BETTER NOT CATCH YOU DOING THIS AGAIN, THIS IS ABOUT YOU AND I WON'T HESITATE TO SWING (lovingly, with more kisses, to shut you up)

ARIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII. BRO. HONEY. LOVE. DARLING. 😭😭♥️♥️😭😭♥️♥️♥️😭😭😭♥️♥️♥️

I am going to seriously withdraw my kisses 💀 AHSJDHFHSHD YOU'RE SO, SO SWEET AND PRECIOUS, AND I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU ACTUALLY WENT AHEAD AND STARTED WORKING ON IT 😭❤️ LEMME SAVE UP RN AND I MEAN IT 🥺

DONT YOU MF DARE TAKE BACK MY KISSES. THEYRE MINE. 😤😤😤😤

No U! And of course!! I’m very fortunate to have the ability to make things with my hands. Always have. I’m definitely a DIYer but not in a DIY sense. You know what I mean? I’m not like “im gunna DIY this!!” It’s a “I’m gunna make it instead to save some money, therefore making it cheaper for those who want it. And then it’s a bit more special because I had a hand in making every part of it. From the words on the paper to the binding to the covers.”

Does that make sense?

And the fact that you actually want one makes my heart so freaking full and my brain go blank due to computing error. I can never ever say thank you enough for that.

No, thank YOU for writing this masterpiece, because yeah, I can't say more, you summed it up perfectly, it's beautiful to find a safe space in another person and *jimin gif*

M-masterpiece!!?? I, wow that’s incredibly high praise. Damn. I don’t even have the words.

It’s so wonderful to have a safe space that’s a person. Human connection is such an incredible part of being alive.

That Jimin gif makes me sob every time I see it.

I LOVE YOU SO MUUUUUUCH 😭❤️ ok i lied about my kisses but still 😤 I'M WATCHING YOU, I BETTER NOT CATCH YOU DOING THIS AGAIN, THIS IS ABOUT YOU AND I WON'T HESITATE TO SWING (lovingly, with more kisses, to shut you up)

AND IF I SAY I LOVE YOU MORE ARI!!????? THEN WHAT????

Okay good. I get all the kisses.

SWING AWAY. ILL CATCH YOU THE DIP YOU JUST LIKE A DANCE. because what is fighting really except another way to dance?

Thank you. I love you. Your constant love and support mean the world to me and I mean that shit so thoroughly and completely.

I adore you Ari.