#this may be a chapter type issue

[thelostboys87]

something still monumentally bothering me about the opening scene of lover boy in a way where i think i just need to lock it away write like 50k words of the draft and then see how i feel

[soaps-mohawk]

Cherry Red, Crimson Blood

Chapter 19: Daddy Issues

Summary: Your pack is back home, but things aren't quite as good as you try to make them seem. Some truths get revealed, while others remain in the dark.

Pairings: Poly 141 x reader

Word Count: 9,337 words

Warnings: Alpha/Beta/Omega dynamics, Alternate Universe, a/b/o typical classism and sexism, angst, PTSD, flashbacks, nightmares, '09 Ghost's backstory, mentioned abuse/child abuse, still pretty heavy emotionally, language, finally some of the comfort after the hurt, plenty of fluff

A/N: This stupid fic making me cry again. I may have lied about this one not being quite as heavy as the others...it's still pretty heavy, but there are some sweet moments in there too. There is a bit of a time jump in the middle, it's roughly a week long or so. Not much, but it does cut ahead a bit just for the sake of plot and moving things along. Also yeah, I got it done earlier than expected.

MASTERLIST | <- Previous | Next ->

You’re warm. Sweat has begun to form in the creases of your body. You’re wrapped around something solid, something contributing to the intense warmth. The smell of leather and eucalyptus fills your nose as you nuzzle your face against soft fabric. It sends a shiver down your spine despite the heat, your eyes fluttering open. You’re staring at a blurry mass of black fabric, your brain beginning to catch up as you become more and more aware. 

Leather. Eucalyptus. Something distinctly alpha. 

Fuck. 

You’re spooning Ghost. 

He has to be asleep, otherwise he would never let you get so close to him. He would have shoved you off, pushed you back towards Johnny, who you’ve traded places with in the middle of the night. You must have gotten too hot sandwiched between the two betas and tried to escape somewhere cooler. That led to you spooning with Ghost, not that he’s much cooler than the betas. 

You can get away before he wakes up, remove yourself from his personal space before he realizes and forces you away. Avoid the shame and embarrassment of his rejection, his anger at you for crossing that boundary, even just in your sleep. Despite the fact you know that boundary is there, despite the fact you did it unintentionally, you’re not sure you could handle such a rejection right now, even from him. 

You slowly begin to withdraw your arm from around his middle, sliding it back towards your body. If you go slow enough, you should be able to untangle yourself from around him without waking him and avoid a confrontation. 

A quiet gasp is pulled from your lips as his hand wraps around your wrist, keeping you from moving. 

“Don’t.” He says quietly. 

Your heart is thudding in your chest as he tugs your arm back around him, keeping you where you are. Your exhale is shaky as you slowly relax, pressing your face against his back again. You’re not sure what to do. You were expecting him to push you away, get up in disgust and leave because you got too close, you pushed past the barrier he had placed around himself when it came to you. A barrier that got let down only while you’re training, then it’s put right back up as soon as you’re finished. Now here you are, spooning him after sleeping in the same room, the same nest. 

You wouldn’t have taken him for being a little spoon type. 

Your eyes begin to droop again as you lay there, breathing in Ghost’s scent. It’s like a comforting blanket, lulling you into a sense of relaxation, of safety, something you haven’t felt in days. For the first time your mind is quiet, not panicking about what happened, or what could happen. You don’t have to worry about your pack now, because they’re here with you again. 

You drift off to sleep again for a while, sleeping soundly in the cocoon of safety your pack has provided for you. 

You wake a while later, sticky with sweat. Your back is pressed against Ghost’s, and there’s something draped across your face. You push it away, blinking your eyes open. Johnny has starfished across the nest on his back, his mouth open as he snores. He’s stolen your bear, one arm holding it against his chest, and the other arm had been what was draped across your face. Kyle is curled up on his other side, having moved from the middle to the far side of the nest. John is missing, making your brows furrow. 

You push yourself up to sit, the air in the room almost like a sauna. You rub your eyes, trying to blink away the sleepiness. That might have been the best sleep you’ve gotten since your heat. It was likely the exhaustion taking its toll, paired with your brain finally being able to relax while surrounded by your pack.

You feel like you could lay down and sleep for another ten hours. 

You’re warm, though, sweat causing your clothes to stick to your skin. The blankets have all been kicked to the end of the mattresses, likely ditched early on in the night. You wiggle out of your sweatpants, kicking them off the end of the mattress as well, leaving you in a baggy shirt that you think is Johnny’s. 

You feel suddenly exposed sitting there, your eyes flicking around the room as a chill runs down your spine. John would have noticed if something was out of place, but he could have just brushed it off as you in his room. He had given you permission to be in his space while he was gone, if you needed to. One of them would have noticed if things were out of place in their rooms. Ghost would likely notice, since you haven’t been in his room at all. 

You lay back down on your back, staring up at the vent on the ceiling. The cover is in place, and no matter how hard you look, you can’t see a camera hiding in the gaps. It doesn’t ease your worry any as you stare up at it, wishing you had your phone so you could at least try to look for one. Though, perhaps it was better you didn’t have your phone with you. You hadn’t been brave enough to pop it open and look for anything strange hidden inside, though you wouldn’t even know where to begin to look, or what to look for. 

You should tell them. What if someone is watching you right now? 

You flinch as John appears in the doorway suddenly, five water bottles tucked against his chest. Your skin is crawling from the thought of someone watching, someone listening in on such a private moment with you and your pack. You hadn’t even thought about it last night, the stress and your fear had taken over your mind. You push yourself back up to sit as John passes Ghost a water bottle, handing one to you as well. You unscrew the cap as John places the other bottles on his desk. Johnny and Kyle still asleep, unaware of the world. 

Unaware of the danger. 

A cold shiver slips down your spine as you gulp down the water. What if someone had entered the barracks last night? You weren’t in your room, and the door wasn’t locked. Anyone could have just walked in and put up cameras again easily. 

One of the guys would have heard someone snooping around, right? You were so out of it you likely would have slept through one of them getting up. What if they were also so exhausted from their deployment they could have slept through someone breaching their space as well. Did Ghost lock the door last night? You can’t remember. 

“Alright, sweetheart?” 

Your head snaps up to where John is leaning against his desk. His brows are slightly furrowed as he stares at you, and you realize you’ve been projecting your scent. With them gone, you didn't have to worry as much. You could stink up a room without a care. It just meant more protection for you. Now that they’re back, though, you have to be more careful. You can’t just go panicking over nothing, not that you should have to panic while they’re here. 

That’s their job, right? Protect the omega? 

They can’t protect you if they don’t know there’s a threat in the first place. 

“Yeah.” You say, gulping down more water to think up an excuse quickly. “Thought I might be dreaming for a moment, that you didn't really come back.” 

John approaches you slowly, kneeling down on the end of the mattress with a quiet sigh. He has to be sore after their deployment. You can tell just by the way he’s holding his shoulders, by the stiffness in the way he moves. You can’t even begin to imagine the kinds of things they did, the kinds of things they went through over the last week. 

John takes your hand, pressing it against his chest. He’s warm underneath the shirt, and you can feel the steady beating of his heart under your palm. “We’re real.” He says, his thumb gently stroking the back of your hand as he holds it against his chest. “We’re really here.” 

You stare at his hand where it covers yours. You’ve seen it before, many times. Scarred and rough with calluses. His knuckles are dry and just slightly bruised. Did he punch someone? Or maybe he hit it against something else. 

His hand moves, snapping you out of your thoughts. You fight the urge to flinch as he cups your cheek, his thumb brushing your skin. “You’re thinking too much.” 

You swallow thickly. “Well, I didn’t have much to do this last week besides think.” 

A smile tugs at the corner of his lips. “We’ll try to make life more interesting for you, then.” He leans forward, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “Now, let’s get these two muppets up for breakfast.” 

He pushes himself back up to stand, staring down at Johnny and Kyle, still sleeping. You shift onto your hands and knees, crawling over to Johnny before swinging a leg over to straddle his stomach. You lean forward, planting your hands on either side of his face, his breath catching as he begins to wake up, sensing a disturbance. You stare down at him, watching his eyes flutter before they crack open. The haze of sleep leaves his blue eyes, clarity coming back to him quickly as his lips begin to lift in a grin as he stares up at you. 

“Didnae expect tae wake up to such a sight.” He says, voice thick with sleep as his hands come to rest on your bare thighs. “A beautiful woman on top of me? I must’ve died and gone tae heaven in my sleep.” 

“Even better,” You say, leaning down closer. “Because I’m real.” 

“That ye are.” He says, slowly dragging his hands up your legs, pushing the shirt up as he goes. 

Ghost pushes himself off the mattress, leaving the room so quickly he nearly knocks his shoulder against the doorframe. A frown pulls at your brows as you watch him go, slowly pushing yourself back up to sit on Johnny’s stomach. Guilt starts to well up in you as you stare at the empty doorway. You hadn’t meant to make him uncomfortable. 

“Don’t mind him, kitten.” Johnny says, pushing himself up to sit, sliding you backwards into his lap. “He’s still miffed he didn’t get a greetin’ yesterday.” 

“Oh,” You say, blinking in surprise. You hadn’t even thought about greeting Ghost in that moment. You had been so desperate for your alpha, and then swept up by the betas, it hadn’t even crossed your mind to acknowledge Ghost. “I didn’t-” 

“It’s not yer fault.” Johnny says, wrapping his arms around you. “He hasnae been the most...open with ye. It’s his own damn fault for it.” 

“Oh, well, I’ll be sure to give him a big hug when he comes back in.” You say. 

“Please do.” Kyle says, rubbing his eyes where he’s laying next to you. “I’ll pay to see his reaction.” 

All three of you burst out laughing, Johnny pressing his forehead against yours. “Missed ye, kitten.” 

“Not as much as I missed you.” You say, pouting. 

Johnny chuckles, pressing a quick kiss to your lips. His hands slide to your hips as he presses another soft kiss to your lips, and then another. 

“Let me get in on some of that.” Kyle says, pushing himself up to sit. He grips your chin in his hand, turning your face to his before pressing his lips to yours. 

His kiss takes your breath away, deeper and more passionate than Johnny’s had been. You hum against his lips as Johnny’s grip on your waist tightens. 

“Christ almighty.” Johnny breathes, staring at you and Kyle as you kiss. 

“Alright, you three.” John says as the air in the room starts to turn musky with arousal. “Let’s feed our omega first before we get too carried away.” 

Kyle pulls away from you, pressing a quick kiss to your forehead. 

“Can we...eat in here again?” You ask, wrapping an arm around Johnny’s shoulders as you turn slightly to look up at John. You had almost forgotten about his presence, caught up in the attention from your betas. The thought of him watching the three of you has a different kind of thrill racing down your spine. 

“Of course.” John says, bending down to kiss you. 

Both Johnny and Kyle groan at the sight of their pack alpha kissing you, Johnny’s cock twitching in his boxers beneath you. You press a kiss to Johnny’s cheek after John pulls away from you before pushing yourself up to stand. You stretch your arms over your head, the shirt riding up a bit, giving both Kyle and Johnny a good view of your legs. The musky scent of arousal intensifies in the air as they stare at you, Johnny licking his lips hungrily. 

“Alright, get out of here you cheeky little minx, otherwise they’ll never get out of bed.” John says, gently guiding you from the room. 

You can’t help the smile that tugs at your lips as you leave John’s room, stepping out into the hallway. It’s much cooler outside of the room, goosebumps forming on your legs. You have half a mind to go back to your own room, but you find yourself unable to even approach the door. Memories of the fear and your panic come flooding back, the thought that someone might have snuck inside, someone might be waiting for you in there snapping to the front of your mind. It’s a ridiculous thought. Someone would have noticed if there was an intruder, if there was someone who shouldn’t be inside creeping around. 

Your gaze flickers from your door as Ghost makes his way down the hallway, his clothes changed from what he’d been wearing to sleep in. You bite your lip as you stare at him, meeting his gaze. Perhaps it's the fear driving you forward, or maybe you’ve gone slightly crazy in their absence, but you find yourself approaching him, making him stop in his tracks. 

He eyes you as you approach, your steps quick as you try to avoid chickening out. Your mind is repeating Johnny’s words over and over in your head, an explanation for Ghost’s behavior yesterday, and obvious annoyance at you and Johnny this morning. You wonder if he’ll take it as a threat as you get closer to him, if he might snap and defend himself. He’s completely still, not even his chest moving. He’s watching you like a predator watches its prey, waiting for your next move. 

It’s like hugging a tree as you wrap your arms around his waist. He’s stiffer than a board as you hug him, resting your face on his chest. Leather and eucalyptus and musk all float around you as you press close to him, his scent enveloping you in a hug, even if his body doesn’t follow suit. 

“What are you doing?” He asks, his voice rumbling deep in his chest. 

“Hugging you.” You say, tightening your hold around him. You’ve been this close to him before in your training, but this feels different. “I’m sorry for not greeting you on the tarmac. I wasn’t really thinking clearly at that point.” 

He lets out a quiet sigh, something you probably wouldn’t have noticed if you weren’t so close to him. You can imagine it’s a sigh of exasperation at Johnny for spilling about his feelings. “It’s fine.” He says, awkwardly patting your back. “Don’t know why you would have wanted to.” 

“Well, you are part of the pack.” You say. “That should be enough reason.” 

You nuzzle your face against his chest, his scent going straight to the back of your brain. Your omega wants to roll in it, cover herself in it until it’s all you can smell. The intensity of his scent has something in your hindbrain purring, the sound rumbling through your chest. 

Ghost puts his hands on your shoulders, pushing you back from him. You blink up at him blearily as your mind begins to clear a bit with the distance. “At least put some pants on before you completely lose it.” He grumbles. 

A small smile tugs at your lips before it falls at the thought of having to go into your room. You turn to face the door, your vision almost tunneling as you stare at it. You don’t want to open it. You don’t want to go in there. 

“Ghost?” You say quietly before he can walk away. 

He turns to look at you, his eyes squinting just slightly as he frowns. “What?” 

“Will you...will you open my door for me?” You shift your weight, knowing he’s going to want a reason, an explanation for your behavior. 

He turns fully to face you, shoulders squared as he slowly approaches, suddenly on the defensive. “What is it?” 

You shake your head. “Just a feeling.” 

He steps between you and the door, wrapping his fingers around the handle before he swings it open, scanning the inside. His shoulders relax just slightly and you let out a breath of air. There’s no one inside. No one’s waiting for you. No one broke in last night. 

He takes a step back before turning to you. “Nothing.” 

You let out a sigh of relief, staring into the space that was once your nest, your safe place. You can feel Ghost’s eyes on you, waiting for an explanation for your behavior. You can’t tell him the truth, despite how easy it would be. You could confess right now, admit to what happened, what you did, the mistake you made. You could drop to your knees right now, beg for forgiveness for what you did. 

“It was hard...while everyone was gone.” You say. It’s not a lie. Not entirely. “Made me uneasy, being alone here. Kept thinking I was hearing things.” 

He doesn’t believe you. You can see it in his eyes. He knows your lying, he knows you’re withholding the truth from him. You aren’t, you just aren’t giving him the whole truth. You had felt lonely, you had been on edge even before General Shepherd arrived and your room was bugged. Being alone was hard. Harder than you thought it would be. It would have taken its toll on you, even without the stress of your space being invaded multiple times. 

You should have told someone. You should have called Dr. Keller right away. You should have never opened the door in the first place. 

“Thank you.” You say, slipping past him and entering your room. 

He stands there for a few breaths, watching you warily as you open your closet, looking for something to wear. You ignore him, acting like he’s not there, but you can’t hide the squaring of your shoulders, the stiffness of your movements. You’re not sure you could resist if he pressed, if he tried to force you to tell him. You’d spill immediately, even without him using his alpha against you. 

The thought has another chill racing down your spine. 

Your omega is on edge as you change with the door open, not caring as the guys move around, getting dressed to head out to grab breakfast for everyone. You hate how inconvenient it must be, but you still don’t think you could handle being in the mess. Not yet. Not so soon. You’ll have to eventually, otherwise they’ll think something is up, happened, and then they’ll start questioning. 

You couldn’t handle an interrogation. Especially not their disappointed and angry faces when you confess to what you did, the mistakes you made, how you allowed someone to walk in so easily. How you left so easily with a stranger. They’d never trust you again. 

They won’t trust you if you keep things from them either. 

They have to know. They have to know General Shepherd came to base and talked to you. They have to know about you meeting their superior while they were away. A high ranking General couldn’t just be on base without someone knowing, and why would he hide it? He had come to check in on your progress and how you were settling in with your pack. He would have included your pack in that questioning as well, right? Besides, there has to be cameras everywhere on base. Someone would have seen you and let them know. 

There’s no way they don’t know about it. 

You stand in the doorway of your bathroom, staring at the cabinet where the broken cameras and recording devices are hidden. They’re broken, you ensured that. They’re hidden away, buried under enough stuff no one could find them unless they were purposefully looking for something. 

You let out a breath, trying to relax as you finish your morning routine. It’s over. There’s nothing that can be done now. All you can do is try to move on, try to mend the fraying bonds with your pack, heal the sense of fear and unease surrounding your safe space. 

Maybe Dr. Keller could help. You could admit everything to her, everything that happened while she was supposed to be watching you. If you had just gone to her office that afternoon, perhaps things would have been different. She would have known, but that wouldn’t have stopped the cameras from being put up. It would have just made it easier for them. Maybe they might have finished the job properly, and you wouldn’t have even known. Even if you had called Dr. Keller, what kind of argument could she have made against a Commanding Officer? 

If you told Dr. Keller now, she’d tell your pack. She’s promised to keep everything between you confidential, but would something like this be an exception? Would she tell your pack anyway because she thinks it’s the best course of action to help you? 

You want to cry. Tears are welling in your eyes as you stare in the mirror. You hardly recognize yourself. You look tired, strung out, sickly almost. Are you not, though? Is that not how you feel? You know omegas can get sick from stress sometimes, if it gets to be too much. You don’t want to get sick. You don’t want to be more of a burden than you’re already being. They have to be so tired after their assignment, and here you are making things harder for them. 

“You alright, love?” 

You jump, letting out a shriek as you whip around to face the door of your room. Your heart is racing as you slap a hand over your mouth, staring wide-eyed at an equally surprised Kyle. You let out a breath, slowly lowering your trembling hand as you try to calm yourself. It’s just Kyle sneaking up on you. Not a stranger. 

“Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you.” He says, brows pinching in a frown. 

“‘S okay.” You murmur, turning off the light before leaving the bathroom. “Was lost in thought.” 

“The others left to grab food.” Kyle says. “They’ll be back shortly.” 

You nod, trying hard not to make your trembling too visible, or give any hint at your discomfort. “Okay.” 

You stare at him as he leans against the doorframe. He hasn’t entered your room. He’s still standing in the doorway. The thought has a lump forming in your throat. Your bonds have frayed so much he doesn’t even feel comfortable entering your space anymore. There’s a wall up again, and you’re only forcing it higher and higher. 

“Come on.” He says, holding his hand out to you. “Let’s go to the rec room.” 

You take his offered hand, letting him pull you from your room. The door clicks closed behind you as you let him lead you down the hallway and away from the place that’s become fuel for your nightmares. 

Kyle sits down on the couch, pulling you down on his lap. You wrap your arm around his neck as he wraps his arms around you, enveloping you in his warmth and scent. 

“I’m sorry for startling you.” He says softly, bringing your other hand to his lips so he can press a kiss to your wrist. 

“It’s not your fault.” You say, leaning your head against his shoulder. “Been on edge since everyone left.” 

“I bet.” Kyle leans his cheek against the top of your head. “We’re here now. We’re gonna fix that.” 

“What happens when you have to leave again?” You ask. 

“You won’t be alone again, that’s for sure.” A different voice says. 

You nearly jump out of Kyle’s lap as John appears in the doorway of the rec room, Johnny and Ghost right behind him. Kyle’s arms are the only thing keeping you steady as your heart nearly beats out of your chest. You’re not sure how much more you can take, intentionally or unintentionally. 

“I spoke with Kate this morning.” John says as he sets the food he’s carrying on the coffee table. “We’re going to do everything in our power to avoid having you left alone again. At least one of us will be staying behind with you from now on.” 

Your brows pinch a little. Is that why he had been absent from the nest earlier? You’re not quite sure what to feel. On one hand you’re relieved at the thought of not having to be alone again, but on the other hand, you don’t want to disrupt their lives, their jobs. You wonder just how hard he had to fight to even get Kate to agree to something like this. 

You also feel a bit afraid that they know, they figured out what had happened and that’s the reason they don’t trust to leave you alone again. You’ll make another stupid mistake or another risky decision that might cause you actual harm next time. 

Kyle eases you off his lap and onto the couch beside him. Johnny sits on your other side, squishing you between them as a tray is passed into your hands. You don’t feel very hungry as you stare down at the food, but you know after a meager dinner last night, you need to eat. You won’t be doing you or your pack any favors by being hungry. 

It’s quiet in the rec room as you eat. It’s almost eerie how silent it is, aside from the occasional scrape of silverware on the trays. You begin to float back into the time when they were gone, the haunting silence that had settled over the barracks in their absence. Everything had seemed so still, not peaceful, but more like the very walls were holding their breath. 

Perhaps it was in anticipation for what was to come. Perhaps somehow the very walls knew they would be beached, the safety they once promised would be upended. 

Or maybe you’ve just gone crazy. 

You shift forward on the couch, careful not to tip your tray over as you grab the remote from the coffee table, turning the TV on. 

“Finally! I couldnae handle the silence much longer.” Johnny exclaims, letting out a relieved sigh. 

The corners of your lips pull up in a smile as you pass the remote off to him, letting him search for something bearable to watch on early morning TV. You’re glad at least you weren’t alone in your distaste for the silence. You curl up closer to Gaz, reminding yourself that it’s not a dream, that they really are here. They really did come back. 

Now you just have to move on and put the nightmare of what happened behind you. 

As the days pass, things begin to return to normal. The guys start their normal routine of training and running drills almost immediately. To avoid being stuck in the barracks alone, you ask to go with them, blaming it on the distance and your need to be clingy still. At first you were afraid someone would take advantage of the barracks being empty again, but every search has come up empty handed. No more cameras, no more recording devices. 

Whoever it was who planted them must have given up, or perhaps the risk of doing it with the entire pack back on base was too high. 

Despite this fact, you spend the least amount of time in your room as possible. Even when you can’t go to watch them train or run drills, you spend your time in John’s room, or in the rec room. At night you rotate between John, Kyle, and Johnny, opting to sleep with them over spending a night alone in your room. 

As you discussed, you begin seeing Dr. Keller twice a week. You’re not quite sure what she told John to convince him it was necessary, but whatever it was, it hadn’t given away any of your secrets. It probably hadn’t taken much to convince him to say yes, given your current state and his worry about you. 

You know he’s worried. You can see it when he looks at you, like you might snap if he stares too hard. You’ve seen the way his hands twitch when Johnny holds you too tightly or gets too rough in his affection, like he’s worried you might shatter.

It’s reassuring to see the distance has not just affected you. Johnny holds you tighter than he used to, Kyle stands closer to you like he’s trying to fuse you both into one. Even Ghost has started hovering closer, using his hands to steer you and guide you when you’re around others that aren’t part of your pack. 

You’ve started eating in the mess again, knowing you can only avoid it for so long before they’ll start getting suspicious and asking questions. You still feel paranoid, being around the other soldiers on base. You can’t help but be suspicious that it was one of them that planted the cameras, that it was one of them that tried to get into your room that night. Who would willingly breach such sacred ground and invade an omega’s space like that, you couldn’t even begin to guess.  

Sure, some of them still stare at you, but most of them now ignore your existence. You’re no longer a spectacle, not after a few weeks on base, not that you’re a claimed omega now. 

That won’t stop some alphas. 

Going up against your pack, though? That would take one hell of a cocksure alpha. 

Just like the one that invaded your safe space. 

It had to have been an alpha. Sure, that beta soldier had entered the barracks, but to go so far as to put up cameras and try to come back and get into your room? That takes a special kind of audacity, something only an alpha could possess. 

So life has gone back to normal, or at least as normal as it can be after what happened. 

The return to normal hasn’t all been good, though. Your nightmares have returned, coming on quickly as soon as you began to settle into routine again. The real nightmare has passed, so now your mind has to plague itself with nightmares that have already happened. Things that can’t even hurt you anymore. 

You start avoiding sleep again, despite your work with Dr. Keller, too afraid to risk having a nightmare in front of one of them again. The last thing you need is to have to spill about your nightmare. You might not be able to stop and wind up spilling about what happened while they were gone too. 

Unfortunately, things don’t work that way. They never work that way for you. 

Someone is screaming. Your body feels like it’s being constricted by a snake, crushing and painful as you’re clutched desperately against your mother’s chest. She’s the one that’s screaming, the sound hurting your ears. Your face is pressed against her shoulder, into the softness of her sweater. It’s the pink one, the one she made. Her favorite. 

There’s knocking coming from somewhere, a door handle jiggling. It’s locked, but you can hear someone trying to get in, multiple people based on the voices from the other side. You don’t know who it is. You don’t recognize any of them. You can’t even make out what it is their saying, if they’re saying anything at all. The voices sound more like the unintelligible roar of monsters, the ones you used to be afraid of as a child. 

Everything is muted by the blood pulsing in your ears, drowning out everything but the jiggling of the door handle. Someone’s trying to break in. Someone is breaking in. You can make out the thuds against the door, the desperate attempts to get inside, to get to you. 

The arms around you tighten, pressing your face harder into the soft yarn of the sweater. You inhale the familiar scent of brown sugar and vanilla, the scent surrounding you and enveloping you in a sense of safety. Nothing can get you. Nothing can hurt you. 

That’s not true, though. You know it’s not. 

There’s a bang as the door is finally forced open, the screaming getting louder as footsteps enter the room. You’re shaking, trembling in your mother’s arms as she clings to you desperately, just like you used to cling to her when you thought there was a monster under your bed. 

The monsters were real, you realize as you desperately cling to your mother, just as tightly as she’s clinging to you. 

Hands grab at you, claws digging into your skin, tentacles wrapping around your body, trying to pull you from your mother’s grip. You can hear her pleading, begging, screaming at them not to take you, not to separate you. You’ll never see her again if they manage to pull you from her. They’ll take you away, hide you away, keep you from the warm comfort of her embrace. 

You let out a scream of your own as you’re yanked from her grasp, your arms reaching for her as the monsters pull you from the source of your safety and comfort. The last thing you see is your mother’s grief stricken face before the door slams in your face. 

A scream tears from your lips as you’re pulled from sleep suddenly. You’re falling, hitting the tile floor with a thud. Your shoulder cracks against the unforgiving floor, making you yelp. The blanket has tangled around your legs, rendering you immobile from the waist down. 

The frantic pounding of boots on the floor meets your ears, seconds before the four members of your pack are sprinting into the rec room. Their faces look just as frantic as their steps had been, concern laced with fear laced with worry. You hadn’t even realized they’d returned already. They had been at their afternoon drills while you stayed in the rec room watching TV, slowly succumbing to the exhaustion that’s been plaguing you. 

“What is it? What happened?” Kyle asks, moving to step forward but John beats him to it. 

“Fell off the couch.” You say, pushing yourself up to sit, wincing at the pain in your shoulder. There’s tears sliding down your cheeks despite you fighting the remnants of your terror and pain from the nightmare. 

“I think there’s more to it than that.” John says, kneeling down in front of you. 

You want to confess everything. How you haven’t been sleeping well for weeks now since your heat, how you keep having horrible nightmares about your past, what happened while they were away, how the nightmares have returned. Your breath catches in your throat as you stare at John, the tears sliding down your cheeks as you give up trying to control them. Guilt plagues you as you stare at the worried face of your alpha. He just wants to help you, he just wants to take care of you, but he can’t if you’re keeping things from him, if you’re lying to his face. 

“I had a nightmare.” You say quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. You clutch your arm to your chest, trying not to move your shoulder too much. 

John lets out a quiet sigh, his fingers lifting to press against your shoulder, feeling around the joint. You wince as he hits a tender spot, the pain sharp, but not horrible. You’ve certainly felt worse things. 

He turns to the others behind him, all of them staring at you with equally worried looks on their faces. “Get me an ice pack.” He says before turning back to you. 

He lifts you off the floor, placing you back on the couch before untangling the blanket from around your legs. Johnny grabs an ice pack as Kyle moves to sit next to you on the couch, draping his arm across the back, projecting his scent to try and help you relax. John sits on the edge of the coffee table, staring at you. Despite the worry still present on his face, his eyes are sharp. You can’t help but feel like you’re suddenly in an interrogation. They’ve done this before, probably many times, though likely not as gently as they are now. You’re terrified still at the way they shift so easily into the mindset of a soldier. You can’t even imagine what it would be like if they were serious in their interrogation of you. 

“How long have you been having nightmares?” John asks as Johnny takes a seat on the other side of you, passing you the ice pack. 

You press it against your shoulder, trying to keep your thoughts straight. You have to try not to spill anything, try not to confess to all of your sins, all of your stupid mistakes now. Your gaze drops to your lap, avoiding the looks of the two alphas staring at you. Ghost has moved to stand behind John, his arms crossed as he watches the exchange. You can feel the pressure of their gaze, the sharpness of it digging into your skin like knives. 

“A couple weeks.” You admit, unable to even think of a lie. You don’t want to lie now, not with them staring at you so intensely. They’d know. They’d be able to tell before the words even left your mouth. “Since my heat ended.” 

“Is that why you’ve been avoiding sleeping?” John asks. 

You wince at his question. Of course he noticed. Why wouldn’t he? He’s been trained to notice weaknesses in others, gauge the capabilities of his men. Of course he’d notice you’re more tired than usual, not sleeping quite as much. He probably even knew all the times you woke up in the night when you slept next to him.  

You nod, still staring at your lap, too afraid to see the disappointment in his eyes. 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” He breathes, almost sounding upset. 

You’ve made a mistake in keeping this a secret. You regret it as soon as you hear the emotion in his voice. He thinks you don’t trust them, he thinks you don’t trust your alpha. You need to tell him. You need to tell him everything, but the fear keeps you paralyzed. How much more upset will he be when you confess that you kept such a major event from him, from all of them? 

A quiet sob leaves your lips as you sit there, terrified of the reprimanding you’re sure to get. The shame burns hot in you, the reminder that you’ve disappointed them. You’ve let them down and now they won’t even trust you to tell them anything. 

“We’re not mad at you, sweetheart.” Gaz says, shifting his arm so it’s wrapped around your shoulders, his thumb brushing the hand that’s holding the ice pack to your shoulder. Johnny shifts just slightly closer to you, both of the betas projecting their scent around you, trying to cocoon you in their comforting presence. 

“I just want to know why you felt it necessary to hide something like that from us.” John says, his voice softer than it had been before. 

“I didn’t want to bother you.” You find the words spilling out before you can stop them. Maybe it’s the exhaustion or the fear or your brain finally getting tired of holding everything in. This is your moment to let out a little steam, to finally release some of the pressure that’s been building. “My nightmares are nothing compared to the ones you all probably have and it’s stupid and I shouldn’t even be having them, it’s been years since the last time I dreamed like this, and I don’t even know why they’ve come back now.” 

“No nightmares are stupid.” Ghost says, stepping up closer to the coffee table. 

“We’re here to help you.” John says, leaning his elbows on his knees. “We can’t do that if you don’t tell us what’s going on.” 

Guilt burns through you at his words. He’s right. You should be honest with them, tell them everything. They can’t help you, they can’t keep you safe even from the things that plague your mind if they don’t know about them. 

“What are the dreams about?” John asks, blue eyes boring holes into you. 

You feel small under his gaze, like you're a child again, facing down your father after doing something wrong, after making a mistake. You have made a mistake, though. You’re facing the consequences of your mistake right now. 

“The day I left for the institute.” You say quietly, voice hardly more than a whisper but you know they heard you in the silence of the barracks. It feels threatening, like the walls are silently vowing to tell the truth if you don’t. 

Your pack shifts a bit at your words, sharing looks amongst themselves. They have to know what it’s like, or at least heard stories about the trauma of being pulled from your pack to be taken to a strange place, surrounded by others just like you. 

“What happened that day?” Ghost asks, staring down at you. 

You can feel his gaze piercing into you, screaming the silent threat that you’re going to tell them, no matter how long they have to sit here and wait. You don’t have a choice anymore. You have to tell them. 

You’re warm. The ice pack pressed against your forehead does little to soothe the burning under your skin. You’re thirsty, the two empty plastic bottles on your nightstand were not enough to ease the dryness in your mouth. 

Hands shift the ice pack, pressing it against your cheek. Your mother is there, seated next to your bed diligently. She’s crying, tears sliding down her cheeks, quiet sniffles breaking the silence in the house. 

“I’m sorry.” She whispers, bringing your hand to her lips. “I’m so sorry,” She apologizes, as if it’s her fault, as if she brought this onto you. 

She gasps quietly as the door opens, her back stiffening as your father enters. His face is stern, mouth almost twisted with disgust as he stares at you. It feels wrong, having him invade your space. If you’d had the energy, perhaps you would have been brave enough to protest his presence. 

“Come on.” His voice is gruff, worn down from years of smoking and yelling. “Get up.” 

“No, please-” Your mother attempts to reason with him, but he won’t have it. 

“Shut up and sit down.” He snaps at her, and she has no choice but to sit back and be silent. His voice has something tingling in the back of your neck, almost like a warning. There’s nothing you can do, though. You’re far too weak. 

He moves to the side of your bed, grabbing your arm and pulling you up from the comfort of your blankets. The ice pack falls from your head, your skin prickling with warmth almost like it hadn’t been there in the first place. Your brain is sluggish as you try to comprehend what’s happening, your legs giving out as you’re forced upright. You can’t get your body to work, you can’t even force yourself to behave. You want to crawl back under your blankets and lay there for the rest of eternity. 

You whine as you’re dragged from your room, knees knocking on the floor as you attempt to get your feet under you to ease the pain in your shoulder. Your father drags you into the living room, two people you don’t recognize standing next to the front door. 

“Please, please don’t do this!” Your mother pleads with him, right on his heels as he drops you in a heap in front of them. He catches her before she can rush forward to you. How you wish you could have her arms around you again, holding you and comforting you in your confusion. 

“Enough.” Your father snaps at her, looking down at you with disgust. “She’s no daughter of mine.” 

You blink up at him, the words seering through the haze, registering in your foggy mind. Tears gather in your eyes as you stare up at your parents, your siblings watching tensely from the living room as the scene unfolds before them. 

“No, no!” You cry as hands close around your arms, lifting you from the floor. “Mama!” You scream, trying to fight them as you’re pulled from your home, your safe space, your family, your pack. 

Your mother is yelling, fighting against your father’s hold around her, but it’s useless. He’s stronger. He wants this, so no one is going to stop him. She’ll pay later for her actions, her disagreement with him. You won’t be here to see it, though. You’re leaving and you won’t be coming back. 

The last thing you see as the cool air outside washes over your feverish skin is your mother’s grief stricken face before the door closes, locking you out forever. 

You’re dragged into the back of a van parked in the driveway. Two men in uniform climb in behind you before the doors are slammed shut. You curl up in the corner, sobbing uncontrollably. You want your mom, you want to be back in the safety of her arms, the warmth and comforting softness that only she can provide. 

One of the men approaches you, a needle in his hand. You whimper in fear, pressing further back into the corner as he gets closer to you. He forces you down onto your stomach, the pain brief as he injects you with the sedative before he moves back to take his seat. You curl up in a ball, quietly sobbing as the drugs begin to work, your vision going hazy before you’re forced into unconsciousness. 

“I woke up hours later at the institute.” You say, wiping at the tears streaming down your cheeks, but it does little against the cascade of tears falling from your eyes. “Never saw or spoke to my family again. They didn’t even try to reach me, and I know my dad was the reason why. He hated me as soon as I presented.” 

“Fucking hell.” Ghost breathes, hands curled into fists at his sides. You can smell the intensity of his scent above everything, the burning ozone of anger rolling off of him. It makes you wince, even though you know it’s not directed at you. 

“That’s why he wanted to send you so quickly.” Kyle says, his arm tightening around you. 

“How did he get you into FIOT so soon after your presentation?” John asks. 

You shrug your good shoulder. “I don’t know. I didn’t even know he’d be sending me, much less so soon until it was happening.” 

“Christ,” Johnny breathes, gently taking your hand in his. “No wonder yer havin’ nightmares, kitten.” 

“I haven’t had this nightmare since I arrived at the institute. They started there, lasted a few weeks while I adjusted to being there.” You sniffle. “Haven’t had them since, until now. Dr. Keller says it’s because I finally feel safe enough to process the trauma of it happening.” 

John sits up a little straighter. “Is that why she suggested seeing you multiple times a week?” 

You nod. “We’re working on it. I asked her not to tell you, because I did plan on telling you eventually.” 

“I’m glad you told someone, at least,” He says. “And I’m glad you finally told us too. We might not be able to stop the nightmares, but at least now we can help support you in whatever way you need.” 

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.” You say, squeezing Johnny’s hand slightly. He was the only one that knew you were having nightmares, but you hadn’t even confessed to him what was going on out of fear he’d tell the others. 

“It’s alright, sweet girl.” John says, leaning forward to press a kiss to your forehead. “I’m glad it finally came out and now we can help you.” He wipes the tears from your cheeks, his thumb brushing your skin gently. 

The moment is broken as your stomach growls impatiently. It’s past your normal dinner time, your confession having kept you longer than you thought it would. You hadn’t gotten in your afternoon snack either, your body having chosen to nap instead. 

A small smile tugs at John’s lips. “Hungry, love?” 

You nod. “Yeah. Didn’t get my snack.” 

“We’ll go get some food and bring it here, how does that sound?” He asks. 

You nod. “Yeah. That sounds good.” 

He pushes himself up to stand, his knees cracking as he does. You fight the urge to say something, squeezing Johnny’s hand tightly. 

“I’ll stay.” Ghost says, still looking at you. 

John looks down at you and you meet Ghost’s gaze for a moment before nodding. John presses another kiss to your head, Johnny and Kyle pressing kisses to your cheeks before they get up, leaving the rec room to get dinner for everyone. 

Ghost moves from his spot on the other side of the coffee table, sinking down at the end of the couch. You fight the urge to stare at him in surprise. You’re not sure you’ve seen him sit anywhere but in the chair the entire time you’ve been here. 

It’s silent between the two of you for a few moments, aside from the occasional sniffle from you. You wipe the remaining tears from your face, removing the melted ice pack from your shoulder, tossing it on the coffee table. This feels very familiar to you, this position. You’ve been here before, back when you punched the asshole alpha who insulted you. 

“My dad was a real asshole.” 

You turn your head slightly in surprise when Ghost break’s the silence suddenly. He’s not looking at you, his gaze distant, far away. You know that look well. You’ve seen it on him before, and also on a few omegas at the institute. You’re sure it’s graced your face as well many times. 

“He was a trad alpha, real piece of shit who couldn’t control his anger. Took it out on all of us. My mum, my brother, me.” He scoffs. “Mum took the brunt of it, but Tommy and I faced our fair share of it too. He used to bring dangerous animals home and taunted us with them. Made me kiss a snake once. He did all kinds of horrible things to us.” His voice softens a bit in a way you’ve never heard before. You’ve never seen him so vulnerable, not even when he told you about his own nightmares. “I’ve never wanted an omega, because of the things my dad did to my mum. I never wanted a pack either, but...maybe something deep down in me did because I said yes to this whole experiment.” 

The silence hangs heavy between you for a moment. You’re not sure what to say, or if you can even manage to say anything in response to what he’s just told you. You had no idea what his life was like growing up, except that he was also a purebred. 

“I was always too afraid the cycle would continue, that I’d turn out to be another piece of shit, just like my dad.” He says. 

“I don’t think you’re a piece of shit.” You say, your voice cracking a bit. 

He huffs out a breath. “Thanks.” He stares down at the coffee table, leaning his elbows on his knees. “Did your dad ever hit you?” 

You shake your head. “Never directly. He got rough sometimes, grabbing us, squeezing too hard, yanking us around. He never stopped my brothers when they got too rough, though. They liked to wrestle, and I wanted to join because I wanted to spend time with my cooler older brothers. Sometimes they’d forget I was smaller than them and I got hurt a couple times. He never reprimanded them when it happened. I think he enjoyed it more than anything. He mostly just yelled a lot.” 

“Trad alphas only speak the language of yelling and violence.” He says. “If my father wasn’t screaming at us, his fists were getting the message across. Sometimes he’d do both at the same time.” Ghost shakes his head. “Real pieces of shit, trad alphas. Makes me sick, the kinds of things they believe in.” 

“I’m sorry about what happened to you.” You say, fishing for anything to follow up his confession with. Nothing feels right, nothing feels like enough. 

He shrugs. “It happened. It’s in the past. He died a few years ago. Left nothing but a stain behind.” 

“What happened to your mom and brother?” You ask. 

“Tommy got into drugs for a while, but he cleaned up and got married. Mum lives with him now. Still doing well.” He says. 

You’re surprised by his words. You’ve always heard that omegas don’t last long without their alphas. But what if their alpha was an asshole? Is the relief of their death enough to scrub out the grief of losing your alpha? 

You stare at the side of Ghost’s head, your heart thudding in your chest. You feel sorry for him, but at the same time, you’re grateful he shared this with you. You have much more in common than you thought you did with the giant aloof alpha. Maybe, perhaps, this can be a way for the two of you to grow closer, maybe you finally have common ground that you can share with him to get him to open up to you more. You know he wants it. The revelation of his disappointment at your lack of greeting, and the fact he let you hug him is enough to tell you he wants something more with you. It might never breach the realm of romance or even a casual fling, but you can’t deny the bond is there. You can feel it, the tugging in your chest as you look at him, the butterflies in your stomach when he puts a hand on your back to steer you through the crowd in the mess. 

You want him to want you. You want him to open up, to peel the layers back and bare his very soul to you. He’s already started. This confession is the beginning of that kind of bond between you. That he trusts you enough to tell you this makes something flutter in your chest. 

If only he knew you were keeping something worse from him. 

You could tell him. Confess to him right here, right now. Spill it all in this sort of mock confessional, this mock therapy session between you. He’ll be mad, but perhaps after everything that’s transpired today, he’ll be lenient. You’re not sure you could say the same about John, though. 

“Ghost, I-” You start but he cuts you off. 

“Simon.” 

“What?” You breathe, blinking in shock as he turns to face you. 

“My name. It’s Simon.” 

Taglist:

@bobaprint @ashy-kit @anunintentionalwriter @mockerycrow @hayleybarnes

@protokosmonaut @fruitymoonbeams-blog @blue-blue0 @hindi-si-ikay @thatonepupkai

@redwites @kattiieee @141trash @lothiriel9 @dillybuggg

@beebeechaos @konigsmissedbeltloop @kaoyamamegami @idkkkkkkk8363 @wallwriterstuff

@smile-child-13 @anomiatartle @dangerkittenclaws @bless-my-demons @mystic60

@evolutionarry @red-hydra @lunaetiicsaystuff @linaangel @codsunshine

@thriving-n-jiving @slayerx147 @ferns-fics @spicyspicyliving @cityoffallencrows

@ttsbaby01 @heeheehoohoohahahihi @sleepyoriana @ihatethinkingofnames10 @cassiecasluciluce

@darling006 @sheep-from-rad @ohgodthebogisback @willow-sages @scythemood

@daniblogs164 @mirzamsaiph

[eggyrocks]

calloused hands-t. kuroo smau

𖦹his hands are worn from years of volleyball. her’s are worn from years of playing guitar 𖦹

main masterlist

status: completed, but i reserve the right to post bonus content at random

tags: kuroo x f!reader, one sided enemies to lovers, serendipity, university au, reader is a musician in an indie punk band

warnings: language, alcohol use, violence, adult themes, mommy issues im giving yn mommy issues forgot to mention that, grammatical mistakes probably, everyone probably will be out of character, please note warnings may change as story progresses, and to check each chapter for individual warnings

minors dni

taglist: closed

each part is named after the song i listened to while making it

playlist one playlist two

introductions: the band | the team

track one: dumb fucks track two: hair of dog track three: monkey jaw track four: hooked fish [✐] track five: magnet track six: the the empty track seven: heaven track eight: bag of worms track nine: all i think about now track ten: rigid track eleven: the shadow baby track twelve: waiting so long [✐] track thirteen: trace me onto you track fourteen: enumerating track fifteen: kute track sixteen: drunk voicemail [✐] track seventeen: all this love [✐] track eighteen: cream of gold track nineteen: liar's love [✐] track twenty: kill me track twenty-one: anything [✐] track twenty-two: just like heaven [✐]

bonus content: band lore nishinoya + hinata lore mommy issues lore tanaka + kiyoko lore bloody nose (extra chapter)

yn style guide

daily click for palestine 🇵🇸

moodboard/description on calloused hands from @causenessus

"inner child healing, DEF vintage core, lowkey 10 things i hate about you "do you like the girl? is she worth all this trouble? either she is or she isn't" type beat in my very humble opinion. big grunge vibes. throwing rocks out your window. sneaking out of the house. the kind of couple to pack their bags and run away from home together/just leave everything behind to start a new life. definitely a kind of looks like they could kill you and would kill you (yn) and looks like they could kill you but won't (bc he's kuroo i'm in love with my girlfriend and everything i have is her's and i will only fight for her tetsuro). cigarettes after sex (sunsetz) for sure and CURRENT JOYS (honorable song mentions: kids, new flesh, my motorcycle, you broke my heart). ALSO ALSO other really specific kind of references they give me lockwood and lucy (lockwood and co.) vibes except for y/n is lockwood with her kind of i'm not living for anything vibes before kuroo comes into her life I HOPE SOMEONE GETS THIS. OR they're nico and libby "you're a fire hazard. stop apologizing for the damage and just let the fucker burn" (which i interpret as "i'm going to love you no matter what. just be yourself") nico and libby (atlas six) kind of dynamic I DON'T KNOW"

[turtletaubwrites]

Bend Until You Break ~ Part 1

Thank you for this request from the lovely @anemptypuddingcup for a Yandere!Law that the Reader goes to for help with a serious health condition, only for Law to take a liking to her... I swear I will write sweet Law one of these days, but for now please enjoy Yandere!Law. This contains !!DARK CONTENT!! so please check the warnings, and skip this one if it may be triggering or uncomfortable for you. This one's for us hypermobile baddies out there. 🥄

Pairings: YANDERE!Trafalgar Law x Fem!Reader

Bend Until You Break ~ Masterlist

Word Count: 2679

Ao3 Link

Summary: You have struggled with mystery pains and injuries for most of your life, and had resigned yourself to suffer after every doctor told you there was nothing wrong. But when a world renowned doctor/pirate comes to town to offer aid in exchange for supplies, you decide to give hope one more chance. Maybe you'll finally find a doctor you can trust.

Rating/Warnings: Explicit Sexual Content, 18+ ONLY, MDNI, AFAB!Reader, She/Her Pronouns for Reader, Reader-Insert, DARK CONTENT, DUBCON, Dubious Consent, Swearing, Eventual Smut, Yandere, Manipulation, Power Imbalance, Hypermobility, Medical Examination, Medical Trauma, Medical Conditions, Chronic Pain, Injury, Physical Disability, Physical Therapy, Doctor/Patient, Abuse of Authority, Kidnapping, Possessive Behavior, Other Additional Tags to be Added, (Reader is described as having hair "above her shoulders" that she can brush)

A/N: This chapter is SFW, but I'm adding in many tags to start out with since this mini series will contain heavy/dark content. PLEASE heed the tags, and do not read this fic if you aren't comfortable with these topics. Some of these medical issues may or may not have come from personal experience 🙃

Extra A/N: I am not a doctor, and this is not meant to be educational, or to contain any health advice. Please seek a health professional. Hopefully you'll have better luck than Reader 🙄

| masterlist | about me | rules | ao3 |

I should just leave. He’ll just tell me the same things. It’s a waste of time. 

You were close to convincing yourself to walk away, especially as the discomfort and pain of standing in one place for so long started radiating up your body. 

The line got shorter, and you stretched and bounced, trying to hang onto a sliver of hope.

“Hello, how’s your day going?”

A talking polar bear in an orange jumpsuit waved at you from behind a small table, handing you a clipboard. 

“I-I’m well thanks. How…”

“Good! It’s always nice when the captain can help people. He’s the best! Just fill that out, and he’ll be with you soon.”

Looking at the form brought you out of the shock of speaking to a bear. Instead, it filled you with intense frustration, until you were practically boiling in your skin.

‘Rate your pain from 1-10.’

How the fuck am I supposed to rate all the different types of pain I’m in on any given day?

‘Circle the parts of the body where you are experiencing pain.’

I could put circles over so many things. Might as well circle the whole fucking chart, and have them call me a liar.

‘List your diagnoses, and family medical history.’

I don’t have one, doctors never find anything. Mom has some similar symptoms, but they're so mild that she's never tried to get a diagnosis. You’re the one who’s supposed to figure this out!

You resisted the urge to vent your anger onto the page, bullshitting your way through instead. You tried to write in the most convincing way to get this new doctor to take you seriously. 

This new doctor. “The Surgeon of Death.” A fucking pirate. 

But he was supposed to be the best, and he was here on your shitty little island for a couple of weeks, trading medical treatment for the town's supplies. You had already heard reports of “miracles,” that he could perform surgeries in an instant, that he could fix anyone. 

Please fix me.

This was it. You couldn’t take anymore trying after this. Just trying to get a doctor to listen to or believe you was almost worse than the daily pain. Almost.

“Miss Y/N? The captain is ready for you now. My name is Bepo, by the way,” the bear grinned as he took the clipboard from your clammy hands. At least you hoped it was a grin.

He handed the form back to you as he led you through the dimly lit hallways of this strange submarine. It felt like you’d entered some other realm, an underworld, on your way to strike a deal with a demon. 

As long as he can fix me…

“Here you are,” Bepo motioned as he opened a large metal door. “You’re in great hands.”

Hands. 

Hands were the first things you noticed as you entered the examination room. 

Those hands were tensed over the back of a rolling chair, gripping the thin padding as if waiting for you so he could sit down. 

Long fingers mesmerized you, tattoos etched along the back of each hand. And as you stepped into the well lit room, you saw the word “death,” spelled out across both sets of those fingers. 

The sound of his throat clearing snapped your eyes to his, your skin flushing as you realized he’d been speaking to you. 

As you realized how fucking gorgeous he was. His black hair looked a bit mussed, but it only added to the effect, along with his goatee, and his dark, pretty eyes.

Already more useful than my other doctors. Easy on the eyes. 

“May I look at your form, miss?”

‘Oh, of course,'' you stuttered, thrusting the paper toward him. “I’m Y/N.”

“Dr. Trafalgar. You can take a seat.”

Well, his bedside manner seems pretty standard, you thought with a small sigh, sitting down on the familiar crinkly paper covering the exam table. 

He circled behind you to close the door, and what sounded like a lock clicking into place had your heart rate spiking. 

“Stand up, please,” he said firmly, your form still unseen in his hand. 

“Oh, sorry. I thought you said–”

“Walk to the corner, and sit back down, please.”

His voice was unreal. You would have jumped through hoops for him anyway, praying that any doctor would listen. 

But his command seemed to curl into your brain, and you followed it immediately. 

“Why are you favoring that hip?”

“Oh, it…” 

Here’s where your credibility would fall apart. Your nails dug into your palms as you willed him to believe you.

“Sometimes if I stand too quickly, it feels loose. Sometimes it pops, and is so painful that I can’t put any weight on it.”

He stared at you for a moment, and you fought not to recite a list of excuses, to try to explain why it hurts when you’d never been injured before. 

“And your right knee?”

“Oh, it’s not bad right now. It used to swell sometimes, and was really painful. But it’s not as bad as it used to be.”

“Did you sustain any injuries?”

“N-No. None that I can recall.”

His lips quirked a bit before he reviewed your chart.

Believe me. Believe me. Believe me.

“You’ve reported your shoulders as being your most pressing concern. Why is that?”

His eyes were almost painfully sharp as he scanned you, focusing on your face as you answered him. He’d sat backwards on the rolling chair, his arms folded across the back with his legs spread wide to either side.

“They’ve been acting up recently. They often feel… loose. That’s how it feels to me. Sometimes if I move a certain way it almost feels like they pop out of place. But I can still move them after, it’s just incredibly painful. And then it’s weak, and I can barely hold anything.”

“What are some of the activities that have caused this to happen?”

He was impossible to read. But you couldn’t lie. He wouldn’t be able to help you if you lied.

“Um, brushing my hair. Taking off a jacket. P-Putting a sports bra on.”

“Did you used to have longer hair?”

“What?”

“Do you keep your hair above your shoulders to prevent shoulder pain? Or does brushing it still cause issues at this length?”

“Oh. Yes, actually. I used to have much longer hair.”

“I imagine you’ve adjusted many aspects of your life to cope with this pain.” 

Warmth flowed into that deep voice, and you shivered as you watched him steeple his fingers against his lips for a moment. 

“If you are comfortable, I would like to run through a few simple movements to check your flexibility. Many of which you can do on your own, but I will check in again if you are comfortable with me touching you for the others. You can always let me know if you would like to stop.”

“Okay.”

The doctor dug through a drawer to pull out a clear measuring device, almost like two rulers connected at one end. He adjusted it, creating an angle before setting it aside. 

He never picked up the device again, and you fought not to shake. He looked at your elbows, your knees, your thumbs, your pinkies, frowning slightly as you followed his instructions.

“Now, please bend over, and try to touch your toes. Just go as far as you– hm.”

Your palms were flat on the ground, just as they’d always been able to go. You could even put the back of your hands down, and stretch them along the ground behind you if you wanted to. 

“Doctor?”

“You can take a seat.”

Wincing as you sat, you shook out your legs, feeling his eyes as he watched your every movement. 

He stood, towering over you as he came close.

“For this next part of the examination, I will be touching you with my hands, and in some cases leaning or holding parts of your body against mine so that I can check the range of motion in your joints. I may also massage certain tight muscles to help you relax as we move through the problem areas. You have quite the list for us to get through, but if at any time you wish for us to stop, just let me know. Do you understand?”

“I do,” you breathed, your face angled up to meet his.

“Do you consent to me touching you?”

His voice came out softer once again, and you couldn’t hold in a shiver as you consented.

Those fingers…

His long fingers were so gentle as they crept across your body, testing, pushing, pulling. You fought to listen to his commands, pushing against or holding your body how he told you. 

“I imagine that seeking treatment has been challenging for you,” he rasped as he leaned over your face, his fingers gently massaging your shoulders. 

The pain and pleasure of his hands testing you had brought up a strangely emotional pressure, almost like tears in your throat.

“It has.”

“I’m sorry, Y/N. It must be incredibly difficult to suffer so much pain, and not be believed.”

You started to nod to keep your voice from cracking, but he pressed his fingers into your skin just a bit.

“Can you keep still for me,” he whispered, and it sounded so close that you opened your eyes.

“Just relax,” the doctor soothed as he stepped away, pulling a few tissues out to press against your cheeks and temples, catching the tears that had spilled when you’d opened your burning eyes.

“I’m sorry, doc–”

“No need to be sorry, Y/N. You have been suffering, been living with pain for years. It’s all those doctors that left you like this that should feel ashamed.”

His fingers had returned to your body, still relaxing, and testing.

“Thank you, doctor.”

“Please, call me Law.”

He was pressing gently along your collarbones as his name rolled over you, a small sound escaping your throat as you melted beneath him. 

“Do you have a good support system? People in your life that can help you with this?”

“I mean, my mom and my boyfriend help me. They’re supportive.”

He took those fingers away, and you mourned them, wishing you could feel that soothing touch forever.

“I’m going to test your hips now, Y/N. Please tell me if you experience any pain.”

“Okay,” you agreed, feeling self conscious of your breathy voice. His words just kept pouring over you, his voice so relaxing, so good. 

“How does that feel, Y/N?”

“Fine.”

He had your leg stretched along his torso, your foot dangling over his shoulder. You clamped your eyes shut. The sight of him between your spread legs, pushing your leg toward you, had you biting your lip, trying not to make any more embarrassing noises. 

“How’s this?”

“Fine.”

He hadn’t gotten close to your limit, but he went agonizingly slow. You could feel his firm abs warming your thigh through your clothes, his thin shirt not doing much to keep the press of him at bay. 

“You said that your mom and your boyfriend support you. How do they do that?”

“Oh, uh,” you shook your head, trying to focus on the question, and not the gentle rocking motion he’d started as he pushed you even further.

“They help me when… They help me when I’m having bad days. They listen. They both do little different things when things are bad.”

“How’s this?”

“Still fine.”

“You can go further?”

“Yeah, I can–,” you had reached for your thigh, planning to pull it toward your chest to show him, but his eyes above you stopped you before his voice did. 

“I’ll get you there, Y/N. You can hurt yourself if you rush. Can you take it slow for me?”

“Perfect,” he praised when you nodded, still gently rocking your body forward and back as he pushed, finally reaching the limit. 

“That is quite the range of motion,” he noted, carefully laying that leg down to move to the other side. “May I?”

He set himself up again, moving slow as he used his body to stretch you.

“You said that they help you on bad days, is that right?”

Meeting his sharp eyes, you took a minute to understand.

“Yes, they do.”

His face tilted a bit as he pressed closer. He started that gentle rocking motion, almost thrusting against you to help your body relax. 

“But Y/N, from what I’ve seen today, it seems like all of your days are bad. Aren’t they?”

“I…”

“All these years with no one to believe you. It must be hard to believe yourself sometimes. Do you think they really believe you, Y/N? Do they believe how much pain you’re in as you struggle through each day? As you stand up too fast, or brush your hair? Do you think they understand?”

He’d pushed closer, looming over you as he held your thigh against him. 

“Why are you–”

“I need to make sure that my patients have the support systems they need.”

His voice had smoothed back now, from almost heated to cool and detached.

He’s the only person that’s ever seemed like they understand. He must believe me. Of course he would be passionate about it, he’s a doctor. A doctor that believes me.

Closer and closer, his eyes watching yours.

“Do they believe you?”

“I think,” you started, eyes wide as you fought more tears, “I think they try to believe me. They just… They don’t know what it’s like. They don’t understand.”

“How’s this?”

“It’s fine.”

“Alright, last push.”

Your thigh was pressed between your bodies, and he stayed there.

“Does this hurt, Y/N,” he rasped, his breath warming your face. 

“No.”

He helped you stretch your leg out on the table, sitting backwards in the rolling chair before he told you to sit up.

“I believe I understand the cause of your pain, and why you’ve had a difficult time obtaining a diagnosis.”

“Can you fix it?”

Your thrill of excitement got caught in your throat at the look in his eyes, his palm up to halt your questions. 

“I believe it may be a connective tissue disorder, which would explain your hypermobility, as well as the complications you’ve had with many parts of your body. You've already met the criteria for one type based on our examination today. I would like you to come back tomorrow so that we can review more of your symptoms to be sure, and to discuss treatments.”

“You can do surgery, right? Can you fix it?”

You had gestured to him, your body panicking with failing hope. A gasp left your throat as those tattooed fingers caught your hand, his thumb rubbing over your skin as his voice went low.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. This is not a condition that can be cured,” he confessed, squeezing your hand as your body slumped. “Connective tissues run throughout our entire body, and if I am correct, yours may be weaker than most. 'Loose,' as you said. Unfortunately, there is no known way to repair or replace those tissues.”

A weight fell over you, and you found yourself not quite in your body. Your body that you’d fought so hard to fix.

That can never be fixed.

The doctor pressed your hand between his, smoothing over and warming your fingers until you were present enough to meet his eyes.

“It may not be curable, Y/N, but it can be managed. You don’t need to suffer alone in such pain like you have been. I’ll do everything I can to ensure that things are better for you. Do you trust me?”

There was something so intense about his face. The way he looked at you felt heavy, like he really did see the weight you’d carried all these years. You sank into those gray eyes, and realized you did.

“I trust you, Doctor.”

“Please. Y/N,” he hummed, releasing your hand, “call me, Law.”

Likes and reblogs bring me much ✨dopamine✨ thank you so much!

a/n: Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed it! Welcome to my frustration with the health care system 😅

Tag List: @shewrites02 | @jadeddangel

Part 2

| masterlist | about me | rules | ao3 |

[percygranate]

⚠️PSA – ickybatz is back! Predators on AO3⚠️

⚠️TW for Mentions of Child Sexual Abuse, Child Abuse, Minor Sexual Content, Pedophilia, GROOMING, and Pedophile Conversations. PLEASE read and reblog if you can.

IMPORTANT UPDATE: Demobatz is NOT ickybatz, also known as batty-ruski, battyrusk.

I made a mistake by assuming due to the names, and after being in contact with Demobatz, I edited the post. I apologize for this but don't fully regret calling them out, as it helped Demobatz realize they made a mistake and it brought a lot of attention to the issue of predators on AO3 and Tumblr.

In-depth explanation [HERE]!

This 13/16-year-old CHILD is out here asking for pedophilia requests and getting encouraged and groomed by predators.

I accidentally came across it, and I encourage you to report them and everyone interacting with their work. There is a difference between dark romance, dark fics, and straight-up romanticization of children being assaulted.

They write about these children actively partaking and enjoying it, hoping they can please the adult taking advantage of them. These works are clearly written for the type of person that gets off on it.

——— Update ———

Their way of writing to cope with past trauma was groomed and manipulated by predators on AO3.

——— Update ———

——— False Information | Demobatz isn't Ickybatz ———

So much for “Oh, they are a traumatized child and made a mistake.” They now know it's wrong and continue doing it, even worse than before. And people continue to support it.

Their fucking apology was absolute bullshit. And everyone that came to their defense should be ashamed of themselves.

——— False Information | Demobatz isn't Ickybatz ———

↓ Here are AO3 accounts supporting this. ↓

Yes, they put warnings on their work and say “Don’t Like It, Don’t Read It!” But I would like to show you what they are writing, and how they are getting the attention of predators. I am sure you have to agree with me that they and everyone supporting this need to lose any type of platform they own. Demobatz should NOT be in any contact with these men.

⚠️They encourage each others to write this and Demobatz, A 13/16-YEAR-OLD, is actively putting themselves in danger by making “friends” for roleplay, and exchanging social media, with very likely, PEDOPHILES. They are actively getting groomed by people that know what they are doing.⚠️

——————————————————

↓These are their two original works↓

Financial Struggles — The summary says it all. But I feel like I should point out their conversation under their post.

Mother’s Milk — Sexual Assault of a male baby.

——————————————————

↓This is their work in the Stranger Things Fandom↓

Their work “Deceit” which is taking requests and actively posting has, as of May 21st, 16 Chapters.

1 — “Using this as a coping mechanism for my own trauma. Please request, any age is allowed❤️”

2 — Eddie Munson, 25 y/o | Reader, 17 y/o

3 — Uncle Steve Harrington & Eddie Munson | Reader, 6 y/o

4 — Eddie Munson, 20 y/o | Reader, 12 y/o

5 — Steve, 19 y/o & Eddie, 20 y/o | Reader, 14 y/o

6 — Dad Steve | Reader, 8 y/o

7 — Dad Steve & Eddie | Reader, 8 y/o

8 — Big Brother Steve | Reader, 4 y/o

9 — Big Brother Billy Hargrove | Reader, 6 y/o

10 — “Posting this so that you all can give me ideas on what to post next❤️ Anything is allowed/ age can be whatever you want♡♡!”

11 — Billy & Steve | Reader, 3 y/o

12 — Hopper & Joyce | Reader, 4 y/o

13 — !BILLY HARGROVE AND A NEWBORN BABY!

14 — Billy | Reader, 6 y/o & Max, 7 y/o

15 — “It hasn't been a week and I'm almost at 2,000 reads! Thank you all so much♡♡ Feel free to drop suggestions, request or even ideas/blurbs♡♡”

16 — Big Brother Eddie / Reader over the years, starting at 6 y/o

——————————————————

They actively encourage pedophilia and put themselves on a silver platter for predators.

If you are still trying to justify these types of works, please do it off anon and openly so you can be blocked since you are part of the problem.

Do not send threats, bullying, or harassment their way. Block and Report.

If you know one or more of the interacting blogs, call them out.

⚠️UPDATE: 22nd of May⚠️

Dear fellow Bloggers, Demobatz pedophilia fic “Deceit” has been taken down!

Yet their two original works (mentioned above) are still there. I ask you to keep reporting them!

Demobatz is currently using Wit as their social media to exchange ideas for their CSA & incest Erotica, and worse, to roleplay with potential predators.

⚠️Update: May 25th⚠️

AO3 has removed their account or they deleted it themselves. Their Wit profile has been deleted.

Due to this post, my blogs keep getting shadowbanned and reported.

⚠️Update: May 26th⚠️

DEMOBATZ CONTACTED ME AND I CAN CONFIRM THIS APOLOGY TO BE REAL!

In-depth continuation and explanation [HERE]!

⚠️I turned off Reblogs as the original post with false information is still making rounds and therefore people are missing information.⚠️

[if-whats-new]

What's New In IF? Issue 3 (2024)

By Erika, Marjorie, Axelle, Zach and Noi

Now Available!

Itch.io - Google Drive - Keep Reading below

EDITORIAL

A proper (re-)introduction

As mentioned in our first edition, this zine became a thing after a 2am- fuelled frustrated rant. We were just so excited with the idea that we ran with it without thinking properly about a format or rules or even…

Doing a proper introduction.

So, two issues later, we're hoping to remedy that…

Hi! We are Erika, Marjorie, Axelle, Zach, and Noi. A tiny groupe of IF fanatics wanting to bring something to the community, and hoping to help it connect more together.

We're not authors (this is as far as you will read our writing) or coders (except Noi, but not IF) or illustrators. We're just avid readers/players wanting to talk about what's out there. A big dream, a lot of will, and a bit of sillyness.

If you want to know more facts about us, check out this post!

We hope you enjoy this issue!

ERIKA, MARJORIE, AXELLE, ZACH, AND NOI

ADDENDUM

The game mentioned as Midnight Market is actually Night Market. Apologies to @night-market-if.

31st March, midnight was not made in Ren’Py, but in Unity. Apologies to Prof. Lily.

It was also pointed out to us that we have been writing Ren’Py wrong all this time…

REWIND

BECAUSE WE MISSED SOME THINGS LAST WEEK

"THE TORTURE AUDIENCE IS NOT SERVED IN TODAY'S ECONOMY" is a recent interview with Porpentine, formatted in Twine.

Phantasmagoria: Nightmare’s End (CScript) released Chapter 5 and part of Chapter 6 (Forum).

Wayfarer (Twine) released a new Route for its Alpha Build (announcement). @idrellegames

EVENTS

Spotlight on: The Text Adventure Literacy Jam

VERB + NOUN makes the world go round!

The TALJ is a yearly parser-based text-adventure competition, where participants have to create a text-adventure suitable for players with no or little prior experience. It is part of the TAL project.

The goal of this competition, and the project as a whole, is to encourage authors to create games targetted at beginners, be more inclusive in game-making, teach new generations the skills needed to play text-adventure games (and potentially inspire them to create their own!).

Each game submitted to the competition must be a parser text-adventure, with clear instruction on how to play the game, include a tutorial, have at least five puzzles, and should not lead to a losing ending. Some games will go even further, including a hint system, a walkthrough or other type of help.

This year, the optional theme was “Fairy Tales”, which was followed by more of the 10 entries submitted to the jam, ranging from old folk tales, mythology, and, of course… fairy tales!

You can play the entries and vote for them with an itch.io account until the end of May. The competition is looking for beginner players!

CONFERENCE

You can now register for the Narrascope! It is happening June 21-23, in hybrid. They've also released the schedule of talks!

ONGOING (VOTING)

Only one week left to vote for your favourite games of the Spring Thing! Since the votes are still pretty tight, they are looking for players and voters to help determine the winners!

[And the Text Adventure Literacy Jam too!]

ONGOING (SUBMITTING)

On the Choice of Game Forum, the Diversity Jam is running. They accept any CScript game… as long at is not in ENGLISH! The deadline is already tomorrow!

As well, the deadline for the BITSY JAM, is coming up in a few days! The theme is No Dialogue!

The Really Bad IF Jam has just started. For if you're tired of always making great games. Come make a terrible one instead! The worst you can!

If Spanish is in your wheelhouse, the Spanish IFComp (Rayuela) also started this week! You can submit a game until the end of June, with the themes Es un sólo botón and/or Conexión.

Also started this week is the ParserComp, which are looking for parser games, both with a classic feel or a more experimental approach.

If you are looking to make a Visual Novel, the Otome Jam will be looking for entries for the next two months.

🔥 Fuck Capitalism Jam 2024 🔥 is also a fun jam to participate in, where you can submit stories critiquing capitalism (as a whole/aspects of). (We know it's not technically IF, but they took IF entries before)

ENDED

The annual Grand Prix has announced its winner. Congratulations to all participants!

The Dialogue Jam by the Neo-Interactives (@neointeractives) group ended just a few days ago. Check out the three dozen entries released!

Another jam that ended this week was the Amare Games Festival 2024, with 34 entries all about love!

OTHER

The Interactive Fiction Showcase is still running, with new submissions, since last week! It is happening on itch!

GAMES

NEW RELEASE

009 Lives (Ren’Py) is a short VN about how far we can go to save a friend. (@lavendeerstudios).

Offseason 7.75 (Twine) is an interactive piece set around a collection of lost reports (@rogercheetoofficial).

The Tulip Field (Twine) is a calming slice-of-life short story, with maybe just a hint of something is not all right there (@shytulipghost).

NEW RELEASE (WIP)

ATLAS (Twine) is a sci-fi game about succession science, where your goal is to restore a planet to a natural state. (@if-30x30).

Velocity: The Race Begins (CScript) is a YA slice-of-life project about street racing.

The Underdog (CScript) is a slice-of-life project about highschool.

Halls of Sorcery (CScript) is a high-fantasy project where you play as a young mage, with great power at your fingertips.

HBreaker Hub (Twine) is project about internet communities, interactions and relationships.

A Hero's Start (Twine) is a slice-of-life project (@beanmochiii).

GAMES UPDATES

Children of Iseir - Book One (CScript) has added three new scenes.

Speck (CScript) has added five chapters.

Chains of Destiny (CScript) added an update with 27k new words (@chains-of-destiny).

Voiceless: A Siren's Song (CScript) has included its first chapter to the demo.

Agents of Lucifer (CScript) has added chapter 6 and 7 to the demo (@aprismaticodyssey).

The Bureau (CScript) has completed its Fourth chapter (@morbethgames).

Summer of Love (Twine) added one chapter, of 86k new words (@summeroflove-if).

Wings of Ink (Twine)'s demo was updated with the release of Chapter 3 (@wings-of-ink).

The Story of Sin (Twine) completed its most recent chapter (@devilishmango).

Vice Virtue (Twine)'s demo has has new content added (@dam-peace).

Signal Hill (Twine) is back from hiatus, releasing 4 new routes (@signalhill-if).

OTHER

Dragon of Steelthorne (CScript) is now officially released through Hosted Games.

THE SPIRITED: ORIGINS (Twine) is back, with a public relaunch of the demo (@yuveim)

In Game-Making related news, Golmac (@golmac) is continuing his Inform7 for beginners article series. You can find all the tips and tricks for Inform 7, with the # I7 for beginners.

We apologize if we missed an update or a release. We are but volunteers trying to find as much info as possible, but sometimes news pass through the cracks.

Please, let us know if something should have been added to the zine, and we will shout it out next week!

HIGHLIGHT ON...

A couple of games that we thought were cool.

Sweetpea by Sophia de Augustine (Twine) @thesophiades

“A true Twine hidden gem. Simple but freaky. Sweet and super sad. The contrast between the rude reality and the surreal dreams gave me a whiplash, but I couldn't take my eyes away from the screen. Outstanding horror indeed!”

submitted by [anonymous]

Lesson in Fear by @epykslion and @junibu-art (RenP’y)

A twist on the take of the yandere trope, this short VN mixes different kinds of horror, from psychological to body, showcasing the true potential of unreality. It crawls through your skin.

recommended by [anonymous]

The Familiar by @groggydog (Adventuron)

A short and sweet parser where you can play as a witch's crow familiar, on a quest to save your ailing master, a terrible hex having been cast upon her.

Aside from the cute story, it has amazing pixel art!

recommended by Clark

Your favourite game here?

Do you have a favourite game that deserve some highlighting? Tell us about it! A old or recent game that wowed you so much you want to spam it to everyone? Tell us about it!

We'll add it to the page!

FINAL WORD

Before we end this issue, we would like to thank:

Clark, @kris-mage-fics, @manonamora-if, Sola, Vik, and all you six anonymous posters!

Your shared news, helpful tips, cool links, filled form, written Sheet line, sent emails… all these little attentions toward the Zine has helped us tremendously!

We also would like to thank all of you who told us of cool recs that didn't appear this edition. We'll try out best to fit them in next week!

And a final thank to all of you who not only read our zine, but liked it, shared it with others, left a little sweet reply or dm, or even rated it on itch! Those little bits of support really help us so much!! Thank you for cheering us on this journey!

~

As a final parting word, we have a little challenge for you all. If you enjoy a game or project, or find an author cool, why not send them a little message of appreciation? or leave a nice comment on their page?

A little kindness goes a long way! It is the best motivator!!

See you again next week!

ERIKA, MARJORIE, AXELLE, ZACH, AND NOI

WHAT'S NEW IN IF? 2024-ISSUE 3

[imviotrash]

🗡️Edward Midford and Autism coding 🗡️

During my Hiatus from the Kuroshitsuji fandom, I got diagnosed with autism. It took me some time to come to terms with that and to figure myself out.

I returned to the Kuro fandom last summer, due to (what I now come to recognize as) my longtime special Interest finally getting an anime adaptation and upon rereading some of my favourite arcs, I came to the realisation that I see a lot of my (and my peers) autistic traits in Edward. What's interesting about this character is that he has a lot of autistic traits, that are not really touched upon in media. So lets get into it!

The gentleman extreme (and how everything is taken a bit too literal/seriously):

In his introduction in chapter 52 he is shown to uphold the same beliefs as his mother, scolding his sister for behaving in an unbecoming manner. He's shown to be very close to his family and strictly upholds their values of protection. At first one may assume he is just like his mother, but it is quickly revealed that he is far more ridiculous. His upholding of his gentleman status is often paired with anger, such as in chapter 58, where he scolds other men for not letting women and children go on the lifeboats first (king behaviour) and also being the one to later recommend to look for more survivors. He has a strong code of ethics and upholds it, even if it is seen as ridiculous or even dangerous.

When it comes to clothing, he also upholds strict values and instantly gets flustered and afraid when that standard is not upheld, to the point where he needs physical distance and shields his eyes.

From these tidbits already we can observe that he is ridiculously formal, upholding the social decorum to the very extreme. While autistic individuals are known for their non-conformity, they are also known to accidentally not conform by confirming too much and following instructions to every detail. I fall into both extremes, but I definitely stick to the latter when it comes to social interactions.

I think Edward definitely falls into that category, because he represents how ridiculous the Victorian code of ethics and etiquette can be if upheld at all times. I may dabble into headcannon territory again, but I strongly believe that knighthood and the chivalry connected to it is something like a special interest for him, which contributes to the way he acts.

Aggression and volume:

In his introduction he yells at his future brother in law. A complete overreaction and incredibly ironic considering his previous scolding regarding etiquette. This happens multiple times, especially when confronted with Ciel his gentlemanly behaviour suddenly turns into childish banter. He is usually soft spoken but can be louder if he is simply commanded to do so.

Volume control is something a lot of autistic people struggle with. For me it's especially when talking about special interests or talking to a person who interrupts me A LOT. I am quiet and do not speak often, so when I do I must make the most of it.

Based on cannon evidence, I believe that Edward may struggle with this too. He's loud to get his point across, because he believes that loudness will make others listen to him.

Spiky hair, in this economy?

So we all know Frances and her strict rules regarding men's hair, right? Everything has to be slicked back and she thinks Sebastians hair is atrocious (so do I). So why is it that her son is the only one allowed to run around with this type of hairstyle? Alexis has very nicely brushed back hair, Elizabeths is also nicely done. Isn't it strange that she makes an exception for ONE family member?

So here is where I dabble into headcannons, because I think the exception was made because he has sensory issues regarding his hair. He doesn't like it slicked back in any way and feels uncomfortable with any product in his hair.

Once again, heavily falling into headcannons, so take this one with a grain of salt.

Elizabeth and her influence:

Edward is incredibly attached to her sister. Mainly being protective of her and not trusting other men (especially his brother in law) to treat her with the respect she deserves. He knows and appreciates her skill and knows she's incredibly capable. So...why is he so attached?

Elizabeth is an important catalyst for his behaviour, because it shows the extremes of his gentleman code. His good manners instantly turn into ridiculous aggression as soon as he sees something that he views as a threat to her. Despite his behaviour towards Ciel, he does care about him, because he realises how important he is to his sister. Elizabeth is a person of comfort for Edward. He admires her talent and sees her as a valuable family member who has been through a lot of hurt.

Autistic individuals often have trouble with boundaries and attach themselves onto others quickly, which leads to them unintentionally treating them incorrectly. This is definitely the case here, since he gives little (social) agency to Elizabeth for the sake of her protection. He genuinely cares about her but is unable to set healthy boundaries, because his way of emphaphy differs from the social norm.

Masking and copying behaviour:

What is interesting about Edward is how he copies the behaviour of others. He has a role model and copies their behaviour because he desires to master it. So why does he do that?

My answer is masking. Edward genuinely admires these people, but is unsure of how to adapt their skills in his own way, so he copies them. This is something we can often see in masking. Behaviour that is seen as acceptable by society is often copied by autistic individuals to blend into society. I think for Edward it's a combination of masking and admiration. His strong upholding of the Gentleman code also fits well into this category.

Beyond that, the Blue cult arc also proves that he able to severely alter the way he behaves, if needed. Does he feel comfortable with that? Absolutely not. But he does have the great ability to do so if instructed, which proves to yet be another factor for him masking his behaviour.

Mediocrity in a Neurotypical society:

So Edward had this nice monologue about him being mediocre compared to his prodigy sister and I think it is exactly this scene, which makes me headcannon him as autistic. Because this is the exact trait I do not see often.

In media, many autistic individuals are represented as prodigies and amazingly intelligent and I can't help but hate that stereotype, because it puts unrealistic expectations on disabled individuals. I have prodigy friends who are autistic and I truly admire them, but I need people to understand that autism is a disability and not just "socially incompetent person who is going to revolutionise the world". As soon as one's interest is not deemed useful by society (which mainly includes "feminine" interests), they are not validated. Autism is only accepted by society if it proves to be impressive or useful. It is not seen as a disability, but as something to exploit.

I like Edwards monologue, because I relate and it rounds out his character really well. He accepts that he is not a prodigy, that he sucks in many regards, but that he still looks up to those who fit into the standard. His monologue is something that I've truly taken into heart, because you do not need to be a prodigy to be valid, you should not need to be extraordinary to be accepted as you are. You are allowed to be mediocre. You are allowed to treat your disability as a disability, because that's what it is.

Lastly:

Please remember that most of this is based on my personal expenses with autism. It is an incredibly diverse neuro divergency and manifests itself differently in all sorts of ways. Many of these traits may not apply to you or to anyone you know. This is just a personal observation based on my own and my companions experiences.

[spidergrysn]

Spider!Mark origins: Mark Lee x Reader

cw: part one of many, spider! mark, kinda sorta in the mcu????!? just a bit, haechan and reader are siblings, slight violence, sloww burn, fluffy, silly banter, EVENTUAL SMUT (none in this chapter) dorky mark lee.

wc: 7.7k🕷️

ISSUE #1: MARK’s ORIGINS. 🕷️🕸️

ISSUE #2 : THE MAKING OF HERO 🕷️

Annoyed was an understatement.

All his life, Mark had been constantly on the move. It felt like he was never going to have the chance to settle down and be a semi-normal person. From living in Canada to South Korea and now to the US, it seemed like there was no point in getting attached to anyone or anything because, just like before, he was more than likely going to endure some type of change. Mark for one wasn’t unfamiliar with change.

His youth had been filled with broken promises, loneliness, and distractions. There were three things in this world that Mark Lee loved more than his aunt and uncle Park: quantum physics, engineering, and music.

Despite the constant upheaval in his life, these passions had remained constant, serving as his anchor in the storm of his ever so changing life. Whether he was studying the intricacies of the universe, tinkering with gadgets and gizmos, or losing himself in the melodies of his favorite r&b songs, Mark found solace in the world of science and creativity.

But even with adoration for his interests, Mark couldn't help but long for stability. He yearned for a place to call home, a community where he belonged, and people who understood him. Yet, each time he packed up his bags to go to yet another house in another city in another place he knew this was nothing more than a distant hope.

That being said, these passions were the only things that seemed to get Mark through the days. There was something about listening to R&B music and testing major theories of famous physicists in his ever-changing bedroom that kept him grounded. So that’s what he did. After moving to different cities in Canada, Korea, and finally the US, he decided to start uploading videos to the internet.

Now, he didn’t show his face, but his videos featured him making different technological devices while simultaneously playing old R&B music in the background. It was some weird niche thing that he adored. Sure, Mark had garnered 100 subscribers, and sure, some of them may have been weird YouTube bots. But when you thought about it, if you put that many people in one room, it would be a whole lot. Sure, his account didn’t get much attention, but the few comments he’d get on his videos made his day. It made him feel like he had “friends.

Recently, he had uploaded a video explaining his view of quantum theory while Aaliyah's smooth voice filled the background. After a couple of hours, he received a notification from a subscriber who usually commented a lot. They had chatted a few times in his YouTube comments, and Mark had learned that he was a physics professor at MidTown university a college in New York which just so happened to be not too far from where Mark was currently living.

Today’s comment was a bit different though as he reads it, Mark could feel his eyes widen, absorbing every word the professor had to say. He had told Mark that there was an upcoming science expo happening at the school. It was free for all and would be a good way to learn new things. Reading this excitedly Mark, he immediately liked the comment before going to his Safari to search the event, and sure enough, it was there: "30th Mid-Town Science Union Expo" on September 3rd. Finally, something Mark had to be excited for. For the next week, that’s all Mark could think of, and his mood had noticeably changed, prompting his auntie to take notice, thinking that Mark had finally made some friends or, dare she say it, a girlfriend, which Mark waved off, saying it was nothing.

As the days passed, Mark found himself eagerly counting down to the expo, his mind buzzing with anticipation. It felt like a rare opportunity to immerse himself in a world of science and innovation, surrounded by like-minded individuals who shared his exact same passion. And as he continued to upload videos to his channel, the thought of attending the expo filled him with a renewed sense of purpose and excitement.

Finally, the day had come. Mark wore a corny math t-shirt that said “find x,” some blue jeans, and his annoying circular prescription glasses that his auntie always nagged him about, making sure he was wearing them at all times or his vision would only get worse.

His body bounced with anticipation as, Mark exited their small house and strolled down the street, making his way to the train station. Ear to ear, he stood on the subway train like an absolute loser, feeling his heart beating against his chest as the train made its stop. He slipped through the other passengers before breaking into a small jog up to the campus. Signs pointing to the event adorned the lawn as Mark made his way there.

He took a few turns before coming upon a gym. He opened the door and was met with a sea of people and all kinds of experiments and technologies. He stood in awe, just observing everything around him. For the next couple of hours, he walked up and down the aisles, taking pictures and listening carefully to all the presenters. He was observing a particularly cool machine when he was interrupted by someone on a microphone.

“Hello, I need everyone’s attention right now! Experiment #127 has gone missing, and we need everyone to quickly exit the gym be sure to check your bodies and under your shoes to make sure it didn’t bite you. If you’ve been bitten, please reach out to me. It’s very, ah, fatal,” the man in the lab coat announced urgently.

Mark looked up at the man, his heart pounding in his chest, as he watched all hell break loose. People were running into each other, things were being broken, and it was absolute chaos. Mark felt himself being shoved out of the way as he made his way towards the exit. Finally, after a few minutes of pushing and shoving, he was able to make it out, out of breath but relieved to have escaped the hell inside.

As darkness covered the streets, Mark walked home his shoulders slumped, annoyance bubbling within him as he muttered to himself. Of course, the one time he decided to go out, it would get ruined. As he walked, he couldn't shake the feeling of something on his neck. Out of instinct, thinking it was some type of mosquito, he swatted at his neck, feeling the bug squish under his hand.

“Ew, dude, so gross," he muttered to himself, looking at his hand. Mark's eyes widened as he noticed that the bug had eight crooked legs and big, beady eyes. It was definitely not a mosquito. He swatted, wiping his hand his on pants before , exclaiming how there was no way that could be the spider from earlier.

Trying to brush it off as some kind of coincidence, Mark kept walking only to feel his skin start to tingle, his body goes cold but he simply dismissed it as paranoia. Taking a few more steps, he felt his legs turn to jelly, his eyes getting heavy, and he started to feel disoriented before everything turned black.

•

•

"Is he dead?"

"No, Y/n, he isn’t dead. His leg just twitched."

"I don’t know, Hyuckie, sometimes dead people twitch."

"HOW CAN SOMEONE TWITCH IF THEY'RE DEAD-"

"OH SHOOT, HE'S MOVING! IS HE A ZOMBIE?"

"Y/N, HE'S NOT DEAD, HEADASS."

Mark's head absolutely ached, and the voices he heard were not helping at all. He groaned as he sat up, rubbing his head. By now, it was morning, and the sun was shining onto him. His glasses were somehow still on his face, but his vision was blurred. With ease, Mark took off his glasses and gasped at the sudden clarity. He could see everything, including the two people in front of him.

They both looked about his age. The boy had dark brown hair and an annoyed look plastered on his face, as if passed-out Mark was some kind of inconvenience. Next to him was a girl, a bit shorter than him, with h/c hair, and a surprised yet curious expression on her face.

"Ah, where the hell am I?" Mark hoarsely asks as he looked between the two. The two exchanged a look of concern before carefully helping Mark onto his feet.

"We found you passed out on the side of the street this morning on our way to a friend’s house, so my sister here thought we should check to make sure you weren’t dead," the boy explained.

Mark rubbed his eyes before cursing, pulling out his phone to see numerous frantic texts and missed phone calls from his aunt and uncle.

"SHIT, they're gonna kill me," Mark muttered, running his hand through his hair. "I've got to go," he said, about to leave. The girl protested, "BUT WAIT, DON'T GO! WHAT IF YOU'RE HU--" And before she could finish her sentence, the boy was already sprinting back home.

"This is what you get for trying to help someone," the boy, Haechan, teased his sister as she rolled her eyes, and they headed to their destination.

•

•

Mark ran home as fast as he could, his heart pounding out of his chest. He reached the front door and before he could touch the handle, it flew open, revealing his distressed aunt. Her face went from sadness to relief to anger in a matter of seconds as she opened her mouth to reprimand him.

"Lee Minhyung, where in the hell were you?" his aunt demanded, hitting him on the back of the neck, the exact place where he had gotten bitten. Mark winced, but then a thought struck him. Why wasn't he dead? He had passed out from that spider bite that that one professor said to be fatal.. how was Mark still alive?. His thoughts were interrupted as his auntie embraced him, hugging him tightly.

"Please don't do that again, Mark. You scared me and your uncle half to death. I know we've been moving a lot, but I swear this is the last time. I'm sorry if that was upsetting you," she pleaded.Mark enclosed his arms around his aunt, apologizing for his disappearance. He was relieved that his auntie didn’t question it anymore, just happy for him to be back.

"Oh and, Mark,please shower. I love you, but you stink," his auntie teased. Mark lightly laughed before heading into the house , going straight to his room, grabbing some spare clothes, and going to the bathroom. He turned on the hot water and got in the shower, letting out a sigh of relief at how relaxing it felt. As he scrubbed his shampoo-filled hair, he tried to recall everything that had happened – the science fair, walking home, the spider bite, the two weirdos – but nothing inbetween the bite and waking up came to mind.

He turned off the shower, wrapping his body in a towel before heading to his room. Shutting the door, he sat on his bed and looked in the mirror, noticing something different. His body looked completely transformed. Mark wasn't out of shape before, just a bit skinny, but now he could barely recognize himself. His whole body was toned, his arms looked like he lifted weights every day.

"What the actual fuck is going on?" Mark muttered to himself, completely confused. First, he passed out, then he couldn't see with his glasses, and now he was built like a character from JoJo's Bizarre Adventure."Minhyung, I made dinner," his aunt's voice rang from the kitchen, snapping Mark out of his thoughts. He quickly got dressed and joined her at the table.

"I made Jajangmyeon," his aunt said, gesturing to the food.

"Ah, thank you, Auntie, I appreciate it," Mark nodded, smiling as she took a seat and began to pray.

“Hey, Mark, I see you're back from your little adventure. I told you, Jen, the man just needed some time to himself," his uncle said, entering the room. He clasped Mark's shoulder as his aunt rolled her eyes and told him to clean up and join them.

As Mark dug into the delicious meal, he couldn't help but notice his auntie and uncle looking at him in awe as he managed to eat five, going on six bowls.

"Who are you and what did you do with my nephew? his auntie chuckles as mark ravenously ate. Mark pauses his eating laughing quietly and shrugging, but he couldn’t help thinking again… what in the hell was wrong with him.”

•

•

As Mark settled back into his daily routine, he couldn't shake the feeling that something was off. Strange changes were occurring within him. His senses seemed sharper, his reflexes quicker. Initially, he attributed it to the adrenaline rush from the spider venom clearing out of his system, but as more days passed, he began to realize there was something going on with his body he just didn’t know what.

Like a couple days ago he found his phone quite literally sticking to his hand like glue. Another time, as his auntie was about to drop something, and he experienced a weird tingling sensation, and with lightning-fast reflexes, he managed to catch it before it hit the ground. And then there was the odd incident when he dropped something, and as he thrust out his wrists to catch it, he noticed a sticky white fluid oozing from his wrists.

All these thing led Mark to a startling conclusion: either he was going through puberty again, which compared to the things happening to him did not seem highly unlikely, or that spider bite had changed him. It had altered him into some kind of superhuman freak, and Mark struggled to weigh that in his head.

Night after night, Mark found himself hunched over his computer, scouring the web for any clue that could shed light on his newfound abilities. Hours turned into days as he delved into articles and videos, hoping for a breakthrough, only to be met with frustration and defeat. With a heavy sigh, he ran his hands through his hair in frustration before defeatedly turning off his computer and chucking his notebook full of possibilities at the wall. His exhaustion was taking over and he decided to tackle this spider shit tomorrow.

As Saturday morning arrived,Mark found himself awake earlier than usual. The cool breeze whispered through the open window, beckoning him outside. Needing to clear his head a bit , he quietly slipped out of the house, not wanting to disturb his sleeping auntie and uncle. The streets were quiet, the wind was cool, and it was the perfect time for a morning jog.

As Mark pounded the pavement, his thoughts swirled with uncertainty. The rhythmic thud of his footsteps and the steady beat of his music provided a temporary escape, allowing him to clear his mind. He looks at his watch seeing that it was somehow 1 pm… he has been running for a little over 6 hours and hadn’t even worked up much of a sweat.

“What the actual hell is going on.” he groans to himself as he decides to take a break from jogging and try and find something to eat. Weirdly enough , as he was walking down the street a strange sensation washed over him—a familiar tingling that prickled his skin and made the hairs on his arms stand on end. With a frown, he removed his headphones, tuning in to the sounds of the city awakening around him.

Ahead, in a dimly lit alley, Mark heard voices—a commotion that was almost inviting him to come in. Peering around the corner, he spotted a group of men surrounding a lone girl backpack. Their menacing words echoed off the walls as they demanded her belongings."Come on, Stark, no one is here to save you. Hand over your stuff, and nobody gets hurt," one of the men taunted, his voice dripping with malice.

Mark's heart raced as he watched the scene unfold, his mind racing to place where he had seen the girl before. There was something familiar about her, something that tugged at the edges of his memory, but he couldn't quite grasp it. With a surge of adrenaline, Mark knew he couldn't stand idly by. He put his hoodie over his head concealing his face and took a big deep breath. This was his moment to step into the unknown, to test the limits of his newfound powers, and to help someone out.

"And why should I? If you want money so bad, get a JOB... J-O-B. Do you need me to spell 'application' out for you too?" The girl retorted, a hint of amusement in her voice, before one of the guys grabbed her collar.

Without a second thought, Mark sprang into action. With newfound agility and strength, he swiftly removed the robber from the girl's grasp and stood between them, a dorky determined expression on his face as he kept his face down not wanting his identity to be seen by robbers.

"Uh, I wouldn't be doing that if I were you," Mark said, attempting to deepen his voice, though he couldn't help but cringe inwardly at how it came out.

"Oh my God, who is this loser?" the man scoffed, joined by his two lackeys in mocking laughter.

Mark's heart sank at their taunts, but he steadied himself. "Alright, captain save-a-hoe over here. What exactly will you do to me, loser?" the man sneered, before Mark's fist connected with his jaw, sending him crashing into a pile of trash cans.

"Holy shit, that kid is strong," the other two men exclaimed, abandoning their unconscious companion and fleeing the scene.

Rubbing his barely aching hand, Mark turned to the girl. "Oh, hey... you're welcome for saving you," he muttered, scratching the back of his neck nervously.

"Uh, thanks, I guess," she replied awkwardly, eyeing him with a mixture of surprise and skepticism. "I totally was handling it on my own, but, uh, yeah, sure, thanks."

Mark felt a pang of disappointment. He had hoped to be hailed as a hero, not dismissed like he some kind of nuisance. "Sorry, it just looked like you needed help—"

"I didn't. I could've handled it on my own," the girl interjected firmly, before turning to walk away.

Mark sighed, preparing to leave, when he heard her voice again. "Wait, I know you... you're the boy from a few weeks ago, I found passed out." She comes up to him taking his hoodie off, she had gotten a small glance at him when he had bolted in the alley.

And then it clicked—Mark remembered her. "Yeah, that was me. Uh, thank you for helping me that day. I was in such a rush, I wasn't thinking," he admitted sheepishly.

"No worries, consider us even," she said with a soft giggle, extending her hand. "I'm Stark, Y/n Stark."

Mark's eyes widened in surprise. "L-like Stark Industries?" he stammered. Although He had just moved to the US, he would be a fool to not know who Tony Stark was, the billionaire superhero with a niche for technology. The name was practically synonymous with heroism and technological advancements.

Y/n rolled her eyes, clearly used to this reaction. "Yes, like Stark Industries. Usually people say their name when they introduce themselves, but yeah," she replied sarcastically.

"Oh, yeah, sorry. I'm Mark, Mark Lee," he replied, feeling a bit flustered as he shook her hand.

"Jesus, your grip is strong as hell. Do you lift or something?" Y/n remarked, her eyebrows raised in surprise as she looks from Mark to her attacker that laid knocked out on top of some trashcans.

Mark chuckled nervously, his heart racing as he hesitantly agreed, earning a laugh from the girl beside him. "So, uh, why were those guys giving you a hard time?" he asked, hoping to keep the conversation going.

The girl rolled her eyes as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Hmm, let me guess. Maybe the fact that my father is a billionaire and one of America's most annoying men on the planet, who knows," she replied sarcastically, her tone laced with slight annoyance.

Mark sheepishly scratched his neck, nodding in understanding. "Uh Can I walk you home or something?" he blurted out, surprising himself with his boldness.

The girl giggled, giving him a small nod. As they walked side by side, Mark listened intently as Y/n told him about her life—her school, her dad, her step-brother Haechan. She spoke with pride about the things in her life, and Mark couldn't help but admire her confidence.

"What about you? I've talked so much about myself, I forgot to even ask you anything," Y/n said, her voice light with laughter.

Mark stumbled over a few awkward "ums" before launching into a tangent about his own life—constantly moving, living with his overprotective auntie and careless uncle, and the fact that he had never had any close friends.

Y/n listened attentively, offering encouraging nods and murmurs of understanding. "Well, you know what, Mark? Consider us friends," she declared, extending her hand in a gesture of truce.

Mark hesitantly shook her hand, feeling a rush of warmth at the simple gesture. She squeezed his hand before announcing that they had arrived at her home.

"Wow, it's really—" Mark began, but Y/n cut him off with a knowing smirk.

"Big, huge, expensive, amazing, and awesome. Thank you. It was a high school graduation gift. This is what happens when you graduate top of your class and your dad is loaded," she finished, her laughter filling the air.

As they reached a gate, Mark watched intently as Y/n tentatively punched in a number. "So, I'll see you around," he trailed off, feeling a sense of reluctance to leave.

"That you will," Y/n replied, her smile radiant. Mark swore her eyes sparkled a bit in the light.

"Thank you, Mark," she said, hurrying through the gate and waving goodbye. Mark waved before walking back home a bit awe struck at the encounter.

•

•

"Hey, Hyuck," the girl greeted, her hand pushing open the huge door to the sprawling mansion. "And Jeno... and Jaemin and Renjun," she added, spotting her brother's best friends lounging on the plush couch, engrossed in some sort of fighting video game.

"Hey, Y/N," they chorused in unison, their attention briefly diverted before returning back to their game.

"Hate to ruin the fun and all, but Hyuck, can I talk to you?" Y/N asked, her smile carrying a hint of suspicion.

"Yeah, sure," Haechan replied, casting a curious glance at his sister, waiting for her to speak.

"Ahem, ALONEEEE," Y/N insisted, emphasizing the word.

"Ugh, fine," he grumbled, rising from the couch and following Y/N into an empty room. Y/n closes the door behind him as he urges her to speak.

"Okay, well, I almost got mugged today," Y/N confessed weirdly calm.

"AGAIN??? What have I told you about leaving the house without keeping a communicational tracking device? Also Haechan scolded, his irritation all over his face.

“Also you know how to fight i don’t know why you never use that.”

"Ugh that’s so annoying and heavy plus Find my iPhone works just as well, and my dear brother violence is never the answer ," Y/N replied, scratching her neck.

Haechan rolls his eyes at her reply knowing she was full of shit.

"Aht anyways , key word though: ALMOST... I got saved," she continued, a spark of excitement in her eyes.

"Okay, so what's so crazy about that?" Haechan sighed, already bracing himself for another wild story from his sister.

"You know the really cute weird guy we found tweaking on the sidewalk one morning on our way to class?" Y/N asked, her voice laced with even more excitement.

"Yes..." Haechan replied cautiously, raising an eyebrow in anticipation.

"Get this: he's the one that saved me," Y/N revealed, her words hanging in the air, begging for a reaction.

Haechan's eyebrow shot up even higher, his interest piqued. "Okay, but this time he was strong as hell, some kind of superhuman strength, I swear to God. And he dropped in at the perfect time, it was crazy."

"I know exactly where this is going, Y/N," Haechan interrupted.

"Just hear me out, Hyuck," Y/N pleaded, her excitement bubbling over once again.

"I think we should tell Dad about this. It was a bit strange, and I don't know, I think he's some kind of mutant or superhuman guy thingy for sure," Y/N suggested, her mind racing with possibilities.

"Don't you think before you tell Tony, you should get, like, some proof? He could just be really strong, and you know, we did find him on the side of the road. It could be Crack. I heard Crack make people hella strong at times," Haechan reasoned, his tone tinged with skepticism.

Y/N shot her brother a withering glare as her eye twitched in annoyance. "We live in a world full of actual superheroes. Our uncle is a big radioactive green man, and you think this boy is on CRACK ," she said, her frustration evident.

Haechan shrugged indifferently before turning to walk off. "You know how Tony is. Get proof that this guy is some sort of superhuman, and then you can tell them."

"So you're saying I should pull a Joe Goldberg and follow him around," Y/N muttered sarcastically under her breath as Haechan walked away to join his friends.

“Not exactly what I meant, but if that gets you your info, then be my guest," Haechan called back over his shoulder before disappearing into the living room area.

"Asshole, so much for his help," Y/N muttered to herself, shaking her head in disbelief as she retreated to her room to devise a plan. She was determined to uncover the truth about the mysterious boy who had come to her rescue.

•

•

As the middle of September came, Mark finally felt like he had some peace in his life. Despite that spider bite giving him these wacky powers, things were good. He was starting up at a private college soon meaning, he finally had a chance to make friends and enjoy being in school for a longer period of time. Although he moved a lot, Mark always made sure to stay on top of his grades and work, and he was so smart that when moving down to New York, he was offered a scholarship at one of the top high-class private colleges. He'd be lying if he said he wasn't slightly excited. His auntie and uncle were doing well and were in good health, and things actually felt normal.

Or at least, normalish. His days were fine, but his nights were filled with endless research. "Radioactive spiders," "superhuman," "mutants" were all over his Google search history. His notebook was filled with pages upon pages of his abilities and his discoveries. Mark would be lying if he said he didn't sneak out his window a few times to stop some petty crimes, dressed in all black and a raggedy Halloween mask to conceal his face.

But despite his newfound abilities and the excitement of starting college, Mark couldn't shake the feeling of something missing. He missed the chance encounter with Y/n, the girl who had saved him and intrigued him all at once. He found himself thinking about her more often than he cared to admit, wondering where she was and if he would ever see her again. But for now, he had to focus on not embarrassing himself on this first day of school keep his nighttime escapades under wraps. After all, being a superhero wasn't exactly part of his college plans.

•

•

The sun crept through the curtains, casting a soft glow into Mark's room as his Auntie Park flicked on the light switch, breaking the peaceful morning silence. "Why is it that you’re finally an adult, and I still have to wake you up early for school like you’re 8?" she chided, her voice warm yet tinged with annoyance, before kissing Mark on his head and leaving his room.

Mark groaned, his eyes still heavy with sleep as he rubbed them, reluctantly pulling himself out of bed to start his day. The cozy warmth of his blankets calling for him to stay in bed as he stretched, his muscles protesting the early hour. With a seep sigh, he shuffled over to his closet, grabbing his school uniform he received at his orientation. He was slightly confused that at his big age he’d be wearing a uniform to college, but he wrote it off as something that rich people probably did. He shrugged the thought off as he hastily got dressed, adjusting his tie carefully.

Rushing to the bathroom, Mark brushed his teeth and splashed his face with water aka his sorry excuse of a skin care routine. Drying his face he scurries to put on his shoes-all the while Grabbing a piece of toast from the kitchen, Mark quickly pecked his auntie on the cheek, telling her he’ll see her later before dashing out the door to catch his train to school.

The train ride calming, soft murmurs and the rhythmic hum of the engine, punctuated by the occasional screech of brakes as it slowed to a stop caused Mark to relax a bit. He closed his eyes, his mind drifting with the music pouring through his headphones.

Stepping off the train, Mark found himself immersed in the early morning bustle of the city streets, the cool morning air hit him as he made his way towards the big gates of his prestigious private school. Cobblestones lined the walkway, while vibrant flowers danced in the gentle breeze,

The stained-glass windows of the school caught the early sunlight, casting a kaleidoscope of colors onto the ground below. Each pane was a reminded Mark of attending church early in the morning with his Auntie and Uncle as a Kid. Mark paused, momentarily lost in the thought , before finally tearing his gaze away to enter the new school .

Inside, the air was alive with the energy of rowdy students and bustling footsteps, students mingling in clusters as they navigated the long hallway. With a deep breath, he pushed forward, his footsteps echoing against the polished floors as he walked to his first class of the day.

Opening the door, Mark was greeted by the warm smile of his teacher as the bell chimed signaling everyone to get to their classes. The teacher greets the class before asking Mark to stay in front of the class to introduce himself.

Mark swayed a bit clenching his jaw as he stood in front of a sea of people wearing red and blue.

his eyes were glued straight ahead as he introduced himself, he adjusts his uniform cuffs as he nervously speaks up.

The classroom hummed with the anticipation as Mark nervously stood before his classmates, his heart pounding in his chest like a drumbeat. "Yo.. uh hi, my name is Mark," he began, his voice betraying him as he cleared his throat. "I'm from Canada, and then I moved to Korea for a bit, and they're both a bit different from New York." His words spilled out in a rush, the syllables tumbling over one another as he struggled to find his footing in this unfamiliar environment. "Uh, I live with my aunt and uncle, and, uhm, yeah, that's about it," he concluded with a nervous laugh, his cheeks flushing with embarrassment as he scratched the back of his head.

The teacher nodded encouragingly, gesturing for Mark to take a seat as the other students shifted in their chairs, their curious gazes following his every move. Mark offered a quick bow in gratitude before hurrying to his desk, his mind focused on how he just embarrassed himself. "Way to go, Mark," he chided himself, rubbing his temples wishing he could get rid of the awkwardness in the air from his introduction. With a deep breath, he forced himself to focus as the teacher launched into a lesson on chemical matter, the words washing over him in a blur of scientific nonsense .

Mark began to take notes on the board, plugging his earbuds in as he begins his assignment. Everyone else’s focus is interrupted by the entrance of a late classmate.

The door swung open as a girl stood in the doorway, her uniform askew and her hair gathered into some weird crossover of a ponytail and a bun, she gives the teacher a toothy smile and a sorry as she tries to catch her breath.

The teacher's annoyed sigh filled the room as He sternly gaze at the girl. "Miss Y/n, this is the third time you've been late this week… and it’s only Wednesday,"He said, his tone full of annoyance.

Y/n's eyes widened with remorse as she profusely apologized , her words tumbling out scattered . "I know, I've just been getting caught up with other things," she explained, her voice trailing off as she met the teacher's unwavering gaze. With a weary sigh, the teacher issued a final warning, threatening to involve Y/n's father if her punctuality did not improve. Defeated, Y/n slunk to the back of the classroom, sinking into an empty desk next to the new boy, her expression a mixture of annoyance and frustration .

As Mark’s head nodded to the beat of his headphones, he felt a subtle shift in the air beside him. Sensing someone's presence, he instinctively unplugged his headphones, his gaze locking with y/n's, whose eyes widened in surprise at the unexpected encounter.

"Mark?" she exclaimed, a hint of disbelief painting her voice as she struggled to contain her excitement at the random meeting.

"Oh, Wow yo y/n, hey," Mark replied, equally taken aback by their chance encounter. The coincidence of the girl that’s he’s been thinking about going to the same school as him made his heart pitter-patter.

"You're stalking me or something, tiger?" y/n teased, a playful smirk gracing her lips as she watched Mark's face flush with embarrassment at the nickname.

"N-no, no, no, it's just—" Mark stuttered, his words faltering as y/n interrupted him with a soft laugh, her amusement evident in the twinkle of her eyes.

"I'm just messing with you, but seriously, what brings you here—to a small private college in New York?" y/n inquired, her curiosity piqued as she observed Mark with a raised eyebrow, her gaze sweeping over him inquisitively.

"Last time I checked, you aren't a spoiled rich kid whose family buys everything for them. You also just look really out of place," she added, a playful grin dancing on her lips as Mark chuckled nervously and explained the circumstances of his scholarship.

"Wow, so you're much smarter than you look. Good to know," y/n remarked teasingly, the corners of her mouth quirking up in a mischievous smile as they shared a lighthearted moment.

As the lesson resumed, Mark and y/n launched into small talk, their conversation flowing effortlessly, their laughter mingling with the hum of the classroom. Despite their initial awkwardness at their first meeting , Mark couldn't help but feel a sense of comfort and familiarity in y/n's presence, as if they were old friends catching up after a long absence. And as they went deeper in conversation, the world outside faded into the background, leaving only the two of them, lost in their convo.

•

As the teacher's lesson drew to a close, the classroom gradually began to stir signaling the end of the class. Mark watched as his classmates gathered their belongings, their movements synchronized as the excited the class. The teacher's voice rose above the all the movement , emphasizing the importance of an upcoming assignment deadline.

Mark didn’t even hear a word he said his attention was suddenly diverted by the presence of y/n, standing just a few steps behind him. Surprise flickered across his features as he turned to face her, his curiosity piqued by what she’s about to ask him.

"What class do you have next?" she asks, her voice cheery as ever.

Mark blinked in surprise, momentarily taken aback by the question. "Uh, this is my lunch period," he replied, trying to remember .

A smile tugged at the corners of y/n's lips as she met his gaze. "It's mine too," she revealed, her eyes sparkling with amusement.

Mark nodded in acknowledgment, a sense of relief washing over him at the fact that he didnt have to sit by himself at lunch. "Uhh maybe, we can go together then," he suggested, his words punctuated by a slight stutter.

Y/n's smile widened at his response, her excitement contagious as she grabs his wrist. “Uh isn’t the lunch room, this way?” Mark asks gesturing down a hallway as y/n looks at him like he’s crazy.

“Absolutely not," she declared, her tone laced with determination. "Let's take my car and go off campus."

Mark's brow furrowed in confusion, no way he goes to a school like this and the food is bad.

"Is the food bad or something?" he asked curious fabout how quickly she’s ready to leave

Y/n shook her head, a playful glint in her eye. "No, the food is fine," she reassured him. "It's just... it's loud and there are too many people. I prefer to eat out."

Mark nodded in understanding, his curiosity giving way to intrigue as he followed y/n's lead, allowing her to guide him out of the classroom and into the bustling parking lot beyond.

As they made their way across the asphalt parking lot, y/n's steps quickened with purpose, leading them to a vibrant red 1990 Acura parked nearby. Mark's eyes widened in surprise at the sight of the vintage vehicle, its classic design standing in stark contrast to the sleek sports cars that dotted the parking lot.

"Nice ride, huh?" y/n remarked, her gaze seeking Mark's approval.

Mark nodded in agreement, his admiration evident as he took in the car's well-maintained exterior. "Yeah, it's pretty cool," he conceded, a smile gracing his lips as y/n unlocked the car, signaling him to get in the passenger seat.

As y/n settled into the driver's seat, she reached over to fasten her seatbelt, adjusting her mirrors as the car roared to life. Mark watched her with interest, noting the way her delicate fingers navigated the controls of her phone, he quickly looks away when he thinks he might be staring too hard.

"Do you like SZA?" she asks, her eyes flicking to meet his as she pulled out of the parking lot, the slow beat of the music filling the car with its infectious rhythm.

Mark's face lit up with excitement at the mention of the artist. "I do, I really love music in general," he replied, his voice oozing with enthusiasm as he settled into his seat. As the melody enveloped them, he found himself humming along, his voice blending seamlessly with the rich tones of the song.

Y/n's smile widened at his response, "Oh really now, that's super cool," she remarked, her gaze softening as she focused on the road ahead. "I love music as well. I'm not a singer—I can't hold a single note—but I appreciate the beauty of it."

The next twenty minutes passed in a blur of laughter and song recommendations, the car filled with the sounds of their shared enthusiasm. As y/n drove through the busy winding roads, , their conversation flowed effortlessly as they delved deeper into each other's lives.

Eventually, y/n pulled up to a gate, her hand entering a code before the gate swung open, granting them access to the sprawling estate Mark had seen before.

Y/n parks the car, and motions Mark to follow her as she stepped out of the car, her footsteps echoing against the polished marble of the driveway. As they made their way towards the entrance.

As they reached the door, y/n fumbled a bit with the buttons, her fingers tapping eagerly against the keypad until the lock clicked open, revealing the warm glow of the entrance, only to be met with the sight of her brother and his friends sprawled out on the couch, their attention fixed on the tv and a greasy pizza box balanced on the coffee table.

"Why are you guys skipping class?" y/n demanded, her hands planted firmly on her hips as she looked the scene before her. Her brother and his friends exchanged sheepish grins, their laughter echoing through the room.

"Free period," Jeno replied with a mischievous twinkle in his eye, his gaze meeting y/n's with a hint of mischief.

"We can ask you the same thing, missy," Jaemin chimed in, a sassy smirk playing at the corners of his lips.

"Aht, it's my lunch period," y/n retorted, her tone laced with playful defiance as she stepped further into the room, her eyes scanning the faces of her brother's friends. Spotting Mark hovering awkwardly by the doorway, she motioned for him to join her.

"This is Mark," she introduced, her voice warm as she gestured towards him. "Mark, this is Jaemin, Jeno, and Renjun. You've met Haechan."

Mark nodded politely, a small smile playing at his lips as he exchanged greetings with y/n's brother and his friends.

"Anyways, I'm gonna warm us up some food, and we can sit in my room," y/n announced, her trying to contain her excitement as she moved towards the kitchen. But before she could finish her sentence, Haechan interjected with a mischievous glint in his eye.

"Not so fast, someone is in the office right now, and if he realizes you're home without saying anything to him, he's gonna be pissed," he teased, a grin spreading across his face as y/n groaned in frustration.

But before y/n could protest, Haechan's expression shifted, his eyes lighting up with mischief as he turned to Mark with a devilish grin.

"Come here, Mark. Have you ever wanted to meet Tony Stark?" he asked, his voice tinged with excitement as he beckoned Mark closer.

•

•

"Are you serious? Really?" Mark asked, his eyes widening in surprise at Haechan's revelation.

"No, sorry, I was kidding. You should've seen the look on y'alls faces! I couldn't resist," Haechan chuckled mischievously, dodging a playful swipe from y/n as she scolded him.

"You're so annoying, Hyuck," she groaned in mock exasperation before turning to Mark with an apologetic smile. "Come on, Mark, let's go."

Mark followed y/n down a hallway, the sounds of laughter and chatter fading behind them as they ascended a staircase. They made a few turns before arriving at a door, y/n swinging it open arms wide.

"Welcome to my humble abode," she announced, gesturing grandly at the cozy space beyond.

"Humble, really? Your room is as big as my whole house," Mark chuckled, his eyes roaming over the aesthetically pleasing decor that adorned the walls and windowsills. Lush green plants added a touch of nature to the space, while a plush rug sprawled across the floor invited relaxation. Bean bag chairs beckoned from one corner, while a large bed occupied another, and y/n's impressive PC setup commanded all of Mark’s attention.

"Take off your shoes and make yourself at home," y/n insisted, gesturing for Mark to get comfortable.

"I'm gonna go warm us up some leftover pasta from this really good place down the street," she continued, flashing Mark a bright smile before darting downstairs. Moments later, she returned, balancing two steaming plates of pasta in her hands.

•

The two of them sat comfortably on y/n's floor, plates of pasta in hand, both glued to some random video that y/n had put on.

"You know, Mark, I have a question," y/n began, wiping her mouth with a napkin.

"What's up?" Mark replied, a mouthful of food momentarily slowing his response.

"You know a few weeks ago when you saved me?" y/n asked, raising an eyebrow curiously.

Mark's hesitation was evident as he replied, "Uh-huh..."

"Did that have anything to do with you passing out on the sidewalk and having that big-ass spider bite on you?" y/n pressed, her gaze fixed intently on him.

Mark's attempt at denial was feeble. "Uhhh, no, what? Why? Nooo," he stammered, his words failing to convince her.

"Uhh, what spider? How do you know it's a spider? It could be a totally different bite, like mosquitoes," Mark blurted out, his voice laced with nervousness.

y/n looked at him deadpan before bursting into laughter. "Oh, Mark, I'm not stupid! You got bitten by something, and it gave you powers. AKA, that spider that got loose at that science expo."

Mark's eyes widened in disbelief. "Uhhh, how did you know that?" he asked, his voice barely a whisper.

y/n simply shrugged. "I did a little research," she replied casually. "You were found a few blocks from a college that later announced to, uhh, let's say 'higher ups' that a dangerous spider got loose. And then you just so happened to step in and beat those assholes up when I was in trouble."

Mark's shock was evident as y/n continued. "Oh, and let's not forget your nightly crusades," she added, watching as different emotions flitted across Mark's face.

"You wanna know how I know, Mark?" she asked, a hint of amusement in her voice.Mark nodded, eager to hear her explanation.

"Okay, well, the news has been saying lately that petty crime rates have been down, and those assailants all end up somehow wrapped in webs? Crazy, right?" y/n chuckled, observing Mark's reaction.

"Also, I didn't know if that was exactly you, but your face confirms my suspicions," she said, giggling.

"I... I don't know what to say," Mark admitted, feeling a bit unnerved by y/n's deduction.

"The only thing I want you to say is yes," y/n said, her eyes locking onto his.

"Yes?" Mark asked, confusion evident in his tone.

"Yes," y/n affirmed. "Mark, let me train you. Let me be your brains of operation. Let me turn you into a real superhero."

Mark tilted his head at her, a bit hesitant. After a moment of contemplation, he uttered a confident, "Yes!"

•

•

WOAHH i am so tired LOL!!! hope you guys enjoyed i love me someee spider man mark lee!!! idk mark and peter parker just have so many cute dorky similarities i love it. a few things im gonna say

-Mark is spider-man in this Au there is no peter parker

-His Aunt and Uncles last names are Park a little reference to Peter’s Aunt May and Ben Parker

-reader & haechan are half siblings that grew up together aka tony stark is a man whore!

anyways second part will be up soon :)!! i’m turning 20 in a few days so it may not update for a minute!!!! also thank you guys for really loving challengers 🤗💞💞

[elyvorg]

The Real Reason That Sissel Refused to Help

(or: the subtle genius of Ghost Trick’s tutorial)

“I just want to find my own lost memory. I’m sorry, but I can’t help you.”

Here’s a post in which I talk about this particular part of Ghost Trick’s story, which I’m keeping as vague as possible outside of the spoiler cut, but those who’ve finished the game should know what I’m referring to. What’s actually going on here is rather interesting, and paints our friend Sissel in a much less negative light than the face-value assumption I tend to see most people jumping to with this.

First, though, I have written a fic illustrating this idea in narrative form rather than lengthily explaining it. If you’re interested, I recommend you go read that first before reading this, because being shown is more fun than being told!

(Also, spoilers, obviously. Go play Ghost Trick if you haven’t; it’s so good and absolutely not the kind of thing you want to be spoiled for.)

So, in the original timeline, Sissel refused to help Missile save his mistresses, stating that he just wants to find his own lost memories.

It could easily seem at a glance like Sissel’s character development over the course of the game is that he started off selfish, only caring about his own mystery, and it’s only through getting attached to everyone throughout the night that he begins to care about others and the bigger picture. As such, his refusal to help Missile in the original timeline is easy to read as being born of that, since this was early on when Sissel still only cared about himself.

But… it’s not actually that simple, because Sissel isn’t as selfish in the beginning as one might think. Sure, he’ll say things like “I have to focus on my own mystery”, or “this is all for my own benefit”. But that doesn’t actually match up with his actions. His own mystery may be, in theory, his number one priority, but a remarkably close second priority for him is to save the lives of any dead person he happens to come across. Even very early on, before he’s grown to care about any of these people!

He doesn’t hesitate to save Missile, despite having zero reason to assume that this little doggie will be any help with his mystery. The second time he finds Lynne dead, when he’s getting to talk to her and learns that she doesn’t actually know much about him and probably won’t be able to help him because she’s got her own case to pursue tonight, he still reassures her that she doesn’t owe him and he’s going to save her life anyway.

And even right at Lynne’s very first death, in the game’s opening narration, Sissel makes a point that he doesn’t want to stand back and let her get shot, and that he feels bad for her, despite her being a complete stranger!

Evidently, even right at the beginning, Sissel isn’t selfish. He just thinks he is. Because cats can be tsundere like that.

Sissel:  “Why am I so determined to save this woman? After all, it’s not as if I know her. My reason is twofold. Number one, I’m not the type to leave women lying around, discarded like trash.”

(Here’s a bit from later in chapter 1 featuring Sissel being amusingly surprised by his own altruistic streak. He seems to expect to only care about himself – yet here he is, not wanting to leave a stranger lying dead if he can help it. Not so selfish after all, huh?)

So if that’s not the problem in the original timeline, then what is? Why does Sissel leave Missile to deal with saving his ladies alone when he’d have no reason not to try and help? – after all, he hasn’t been given a fake time limit in this timeline! He’s not even in a hurry with his own mystery! For that matter, Sissel was still there in the junkyard at the beginning – why didn’t he just save Lynne himself?

We can get a good indication of what the issue is from that very same opening narration I was just talking about.

Sissel:  “Now, I’m not the kind of guy who can just stand back and watch a poor woman get shot. But I have just one little problem… I’m already dead myself.”

Sissel:  “I feel bad for her, sure. But what can I do? I’m dead. But just as I was thinking that…”

The real problem is not that he doesn’t care about saving a stranger’s life. Rather, it’s that, because he’s dead, he doesn’t think he can. He’s not expecting to magically have ghost superpowers; why would he?

And it’s just as he was thinking that he can’t do anything (which, while part of his screen-filling monologue narration, was still his thoughts and therefore something any nearby ghost could hear)… that Ray speaks up to tell him that actually he can save her.

Sissel:  “Huh?” (Me? Save her? Uh, how?)

Immediately, Sissel questions the notion once again, not with a why but with a how. It’s not that he doesn’t want to; he simply doesn’t think it’s possible.

This general idea continues throughout the entire tutorial, which is absolutely packed with lines that show Sissel being deeply sceptical about the idea that he could possibly save someone’s life or alter someone’s fate.

Once Ray’s taught him about his basic ghost tricks and he’s managed to delay Lynne’s death by a few moments… she still ends up dead anyway. And Sissel thinks that’s it. Because of course he does. Even if he can stop time and manipulate objects, he has zero reason to believe that his powers can undo a death that’s already happened.

Sissel:  “In the end, it looks like her fate remains unchanged. So what good are these ‘ghost tricks’ of mine? But just as I was thinking this…”

Sissel:  “It looks like my ghost tricks didn’t do much good.” (She still ended up just as dead as before.)

He even ends up feeling like his new superpowers are barely worth anything, because he can play a few little tricks on someone, but that’s not enough to save someone’s life, is it?

Ray:  “Isn’t it a shame to see such a pretty young woman lying here discarded like a piece of trash?” Sissel:  “But what can I do? She’s already dead.”

Ray:  “And while she’s resting, you can save her life.” Sissel:  “Oh, sure. You make it sound so easy.”

And again, he’s very dismissive of Ray implying or telling him that he can do something about this. After all, how could that be possible any more?

In particular, there’s this vital little bit of trickery here…

Ray:  “Now what do you suppose will happen if you possess a corpse?” Sissel:  “Nothing, because I already tried that, remember? And nothing happened at all.”

…in which Sissel assumes his powers just don’t work on corpses, because he’s already tried and failed to do anything with “his” corpse. If he’d been alone, without Ray to guide him through things, he most likely wouldn’t have even tried to possess Lynne’s corpse in the first place, because he would have had no reason to believe it would achieve anything!

(Meanwhile, Missile in the original timeline also had zero reason to believe he could do anything for Kamila, but he was so anguished and desperate that of course he would have tried anyway. He’d try anything to save her, because he is good and loyal and Dog. So he was able to discover his time-rewinding powers where Sissel didn’t, and thus he passed that knowledge onto Sissel in the game’s timeline.)

And as Ray tells Sissel that he can in fact rewind time to redo the last moments of Lynne’s life, he’s completely dumbfounded and bewildered by the very idea of it.

Sissel:  “Are you serious?! Back through time?!”

Sissel:  “But this is crazy! None of it makes any sense!”

Ray:  “To the time four minutes before this woman was murdered!” Sissel:  “H-Hey, wait a second! I still don’t know what you’re talking about!”

What is this lamp even talking about?! Of course turning back time isn’t possible! He had no reason to believe it was possible, even as part of his new wacky ghost powers.

(Meanwhile, when Sissel is saving Missile in the game, we get a little exchange that shows Missile being completely unfazed by the idea that Sissel’s brought them back in time. It’s no weirder than humans walking around on two legs, right? One way or another, the cat can barely wrap his head around it, while the dog sees it as perfectly plausible.)

One thing Ray says more than once during the tutorial is, “The best thing to do is try it.” Because Sissel is being so stubbornly cynical that he will not take this desk lamp’s word about how useful his powers are and has to literally be pushed into trying it himself in order to believe it, every time.

Even after seeing for himself that he can go back in time and watch Lynne’s death again, Sissel still manages to be pessimistic about this.

Ray:  “And there you have it. The last four minutes of her life.” Sissel:  [strained] “No…!” Ray:  “It’s kind of ironic, when you think about it. A woman toyed with by fate, and a man toyed with by a ghost.” Sissel:  “But she still died.”

He went back in time, and she still died. There’s still apparently nothing he can do, right? No, Sissel, just have a bit of patience! This is just the mechanic that lets you understand what happens before you dive in and start changing things; you’ll get your chance soon!

And once he’s finally successfully saved Lynne…

Ray:  “You used your powers to avert that woman’s fate.” Sissel: “So I did that?”

Sissel still has a moment of being surprised at the notion that he was capable of something like this.

It’s really striking to me, watching over chapter 1 again with this thought about original-timeline Sissel in mind, just how many lines to this effect there are throughout the whole thing. The writers did not need to include this many moments of Sissel being sceptical, or even any of them at all, really, in order for the tutorial to do its job as a tutorial! But they’re here anyway, because it is in fact really important to the story that Sissel is somebody who would not have tried hard enough to figure out that his powers can undo deaths unless he had someone holding his hand through it the whole way.

The way old-Missile talks about it when he’s explaining himself at the end, it’s easy to get the takeaway that the most important thing he did as Ray was to take advantage of Sissel’s supposed self-interest: by not contradicting his misconception that he’s the man in red, by telling him Lynne is the key to his mystery (a half-truth at best), and by giving him a fake time limit. And it’s not that those things didn’t help, but they’re not really the most important thing at all.

The most important thing Ray did for Sissel, the thing that Missile absolutely most needed to spend those ten years waiting to do, was exactly what it appeared to be during chapter 1: to teach him how to use his powers to save lives. Because the number one thing the Sissel from the original timeline needed but didn’t get was, quite literally, a tutorial.

There’s a little bit more to it than this, though. So, okay, Sissel in the original timeline didn’t know he had the vital time-rewinding power. But then that begs the question: why didn’t Missile just tell him that while asking for his help?

For that matter, why did Sissel leave Missile shortly after being asked for help? It can’t just be because he urgently had to go and look elsewhere for answers to his own mystery, because he’s not pressed for time here. And he was apparently chilling at the junkyard just eavesdropping on the investigators’ conversations before Missile showed up. Why the sudden shift in locations now of all times, when there’s someone here who’s actually talking to him – the first person Sissel would have been able to talk to all night – and asking him for help?

The issue here, I believe, is that this isn’t just a matter of Sissel’s lack of understanding what his powers can do. It’s also a matter of emotional state – both Sissel’s, and Missile’s. Both of them would have been incredibly stressed out and upset, Sissel due to his loss of memory and seeing deaths in front of him that he doesn’t think he can do anything about, and Missile due to his mistresses’ deaths that he also can’t do anything about, even though he has a superpower that lets him try but it just isn’t quite enough.

How would Missile and Sissel’s interaction go when they’re both so upset like this? There’s actually a fun little bite-sized example of this in the actual canon timeline. During the last desperate struggle to escape the sinking submarine…

Missile:  “Sissel! Y-Y-Y… You’re not telling Miss Lynne to leave poor Miss Kamila behind, ARE YOU?!” Sissel:  *sigh* “Could you just be quiet for a minute, Missile?”

Missile and Sissel are bound to be both extremely anxious and stressed in this situation – trapped in the submarine, Lynne and Kamila in danger of drowning if they don’t do something. And in that state of mind, it seems that Missile is prone to eschewing logic to be even more loudly desperately protective of his mistresses… while Sissel especially does not enjoy Missile being Loudly Boisterously Dog in his ear when he’s stressed out. After all, cats and dogs have very opposite and very incompatible ways of dealing with stress!

So it follows that the conversation between Sissel and Missile in the original timeline would likely have been an incoherent emotional mess, in which neither of them properly communicated their side of things at all. Missile must have just never even thought to tell Sissel that he can rewind time and therefore saving his ladies is actually possible in theory, because that was already obvious to him! He wouldn’t be capable of understanding why Sissel would be so reluctant about this.

As for why Sissel wasn’t just reluctant to help but outright ran away and sealed the deal – I think, more than anything, it’s got to be down to the fact that he couldn’t stand having Missile being so loud and energetic at him when he was this upset. Especially not while repeatedly saying that he can save them, which would be the exact thing Sissel has been miserably convinced that he just can’t. It follows that he’d just have wanted to run and hide somewhere Missile isn’t, where he can have some peace and quiet. Cats who are upset often like to hide and isolate themselves to feel safer.

There’s one other part in the game’s tutorial that suggests the problem originally might have been partly a matter of Sissel’s emotions:

Ray:  “Hello there. How are you feeling? Not very well, I imagine. A terrible tragedy, what happened tonight.” Sissel:  “………” [neutral face] Ray:  “Ah, ignoring me, are you? It’s a little too early for you to be so stiff and cold, I’d say.” Sissel:  [smiling] “Ah, so it was you. You were that voice in my head, right?”

This is very noteworthy, because Ray is the only person in the entire game who ever takes the time to ask Sissel how he’s feeling. He wouldn’t be feeling great after waking up dead, watching a woman die in front of him and failing to save her, would he?

It seems like old-Missile, with his years of wisdom and time to reflect on everything, realised that his approach to getting Sissel’s help last time really was way too focused on his own problems, and he never even stopped to think about how Sissel must have been feeling. So here, he presents himself as a friend, someone who cares about Sissel and his journey, because that’s exactly what Sissel needs! This poor kitty must have felt so lonely and sad and helpless in the original timeline. But hearing Ray’s words, and realising that this desk lamp is someone semi-familiar, does seem to cheer him up at least a little bit here! Sissel really is a character whose core desperate need is to just not be alone, even if you’d be hard-pressed to get him to admit that at the beginning.

Interestingly, way back when I first played Ghost Trick, on the DS soon after it came out, I found myself intrigued by Sissel in the original timeline. I vaguely toyed with the idea of writing a fic exploring how he was feeling and why he refused, though I never got around to actually doing so. Then recently, the game coming out in HD rekindled my hyperfixation and made me think about it some more and actually end up writing that fic after all. And the thing is, back then, I didn’t remotely consciously understand any of this stuff I’ve just explained here. But even so, I find it neat how I still had this wordless sense that what was going on with Sissel must have been so much more than just selfishness – that he must have been so sad in that timeline and that had to be the real basis of why he didn’t help.

[makeste]

Plus One For All

so guys. can we talk about how there’s somebody chilling out inside of Katsuki’s mind who’s not supposed to be there.

hello there Mister All Might Vestige sir. you should not exist, just FYI. you’re not some Nighteye-type plot hallucination. because if you were, you would not be appearing here as Cloud Might, a version of yourself whom Katsuki has never met and has no frame of reference for. ergo he did not imagine you. ergo you are, in fact, real.

which means Katsuki has One For All.

because that’s the only way he could have a Vestige -- which is indisputably what this is -- inside of him. he has OFA. so. where did he get it. how does he have it. and why is it only making its presence known now.

let’s discuss.

okay so I’m going to try and lay this all out as clearly as possible while also attempting to be as succinct as I can. but knowing me, I’m probably going to wind up sacrificing the latter in pursuit of the former. I’ll do my best though. here goes.

1. Heroes Rising is canon.

which is a fact we’ve recently been reminded of not once, but twice -- first with the appearance of Katsuma and Mahoro in chapter 405, and then in chapter 406 with the “Bakugou no Kacchan” callback. the timing of this almost certainly isn’t coincidental. Horikoshi wants this to be fresh in our minds.

mind you, it is extremely unusual for movies, even technically!canon ones, to actually be relevant to the plot. but BnHA may be one of the few exceptions. we’ve already seen movie 1 impact the series both with Star & Stripe’s backstory, and with Deku’s new gauntlets. so there’s precedent, and it’s something I am paying very close attention to.

2. Deku giving OFA to Bakugou is canon.

just in case anyone here hasn’t yet seen or been spoiled for Heroes Rising, that is in fact what happens in that film! so yeah, that certainly seems like an extremely relevant detail right about now.

3. we never found out why and how Deku got OFA back at the end of the movie.

okay so I was looking for a clip to link before we discuss this next part, but I unfortunately couldn’t find one that hadn’t been edited to avoid copyright issues, so you’ll just have to make do with this.

skip ahead to about 7:10 for the relevant part. for the purposes of this theory, we’re just going to ignore everything All Might says here, because tbh he has no fucking clue what’s actually going on and is just guessing wildly lol. however, I do want you to take note of one thing which will be important later. and that’s the fact that, when OFA “returns” to Deku’s body, it’s only his body which starts glowing, and notably not Kacchan’s. the latter just keeps lying there unglowingly. nothing to indicate any kind of transfer is actually happening between him and Deku, in other words.

moving on.

4. OFA and AFO are probably the same quirk.

as summarized here and here. which is relevant because if they are the same quirk, or close to it, then OFA can most likely do anything AFO can do. so file that away for later.

5. AFO was able to split his quirk and give it to Tomura while still keeping a piece of it for himself.

what’s more, he was able to do the same with Garaki/Ujiko’s quirk, and presumably other quirks as well. while it’s possible that this quirk duplication has nothing to do with AFO and is simply something Garaki was able to figure out using ~*~Science~*~, I think it’s more likely that the two of them used AFO’s quirk in some way to accomplish this feat. particularly since Tomura not only received AFO, but a bunch of its stored up quirkdata as well, such as the information stored in Ragdoll’s stolen Search quirk.

6. OFA responds to Deku’s feelings and desires.

or at least this is the case according to Banjou in chapter 213. recall this interesting conversation on how Deku first activated Blackwhip.

he was thinking that he wanted to capture Monoma, and so OFA obediently activated his “capture Monoma” quirk. despite him being unaware he even had said quirk. it responded to his need, even though he wasn’t consciously trying to activate anything.

now then, let’s revisit that scene in Heroes Rising one more time.

7. during the climax of Heroes Rising, Deku was NOT thinking, “I need to give OFA to Kacchan.”

here’s the scene one more time for reference. this time you’re gonna want to skip to about 3:57.

here’s where we are going to get extremely technical, because this scene right here is the key to everything. Deku’s lines in this scene are, and I quote: “a way we can protect [everyone]... there’s just one way...!” but he very notably does not specify exactly what that “one way” is.

until we get to this scene a minute or so later, which spells it out for us very clearly.

two One For Alls. as in, “with two One For Alls, we could win this battle and save everyone.”

that’s what he was thinking at the moment of the “transfer.” NOT, “give OFA to Kacchan.” but, “we need two One For Alls.”

which, I think, may have made all the difference.

8. OFA created a copy of itself to share with Kacchan, so that both of them could have OFA and use the two OFAs to defeat Nine.

let’s recap. OFA is AFO. AFO can clone itself. so it stands to reason that OFA can presumably clone itself as well. and that’s exactly what Deku wanted to do. make a second One For All.

he didn’t know that he could do that. but as previously established in the Blackwhip incident, OFA is more than capable of making its own executive decisions in key moments just like this in order to help him out.

which would mean that what we saw at the end of Heroes Rising was not OFA being transferred from Bakugou back over to Deku. it was actually just Deku’s OFA briefly self-activating (possibly in response to his delirious apology to All Might -- kind of a “no worries bro, you’ve still got your quirk actually, so go back to sleep and stop stressing over it” type of thing). and Kacchan’s OFA doing... absolutely nothing. it didn’t actually transfer back into Deku. it didn’t actually go anywhere.

let me repeat that: it didn’t actually go anywhere.

in other words, Kacchan still has OFA. and has had it ever since Heroes Rising. he just didn’t realize it. and neither did anybody else.

9. Kacchan’s OFA went dormant once Nine was defeated.

okay, so. remember all of this exposition from chapter 304?

basically, if someone who already has a quirk receives OFA, using it will slowly destroy their body until it kills them. the Vestiges learned this from All Might while he was researching the past generations of OFA in chapter 241, incidentally. Heroes Rising takes place right around this same time (immediately following MVA if I recall). so by the time the film’s climax rolled around, the Vestiges would have known that giving OFA to Kacchan could have devastating consequences down the line if they did not take action immediately after the fight.

so they did.

once Nine was defeated, the Vestiges shut the whole thing down. the crisis was averted, and they no longer had need of a second OFA. they have this boy who is way too similar to Deku in terms of his willingness to put himself in harm’s way in order to achieve his goals. and they absolutely do not want any harm befalling this boy. more on that momentarily.

so they go dark. and they even seal his memory so that he’s no longer aware of even having the quirk. they are essentially in sleep mode. and if circumstances hadn’t eventually become desperate enough to force their hand, they might have remained inactive for the rest of Katsuki’s life.

now, you might be wondering to yourself, “why is OFA willing to go to such unusual lengths in order to protect Katsuki?” and well, the answer to that is pretty simple.

10. Kacchan does not have the same version of OFA as Deku.

Deku is ninth gen. Katsuki, however, is tenth gen. which means that his version of OFA has one additional Vestige. a Vestige whose presence immediately explains why OFA is so goddamn determined to protect him at all costs.

:’)

long story short, while Deku’s version of OFA has proven itself all too willing to enable him in his increasingly suicidal mission, Katsuki’s version of OFA is very much a different story, on account of it being under the management of what I’m guessing is the most willful Vestige ever to exist. and said management being just the slightest bit unhinged when it comes to Katsuki’s safety in particular. seriously, you can’t tell me this is not exactly how a Deku!Vestige would behave. “oh hell no. no OFA for you!! and no memories either, because you can’t be trusted, goddammit. we never should have done this. what the hell were we thinking. if anything happens to him I will kill everyone in this room and then myself.”

so yeah. dormant.

right up until they literally couldn’t afford to be anymore.

11. OFA can self-activate in moments of crisis to protect its user.

Sports Festival. chapter 33. Deku vs. Shinsou.

aw yeah. it’s all coming together.

12. OFA reactivated itself in order to save Katsuki’s life.

I would now like to briefly draw your attention to this scene from chapter 405, in which Edgeshot explains how Katsuki was finally saved. please note my man is very clear that he did not restart Katsuki’s heart himself. he was basically just performing quirk CPR up until Katsuki’s own quirk returned him to life apropros of nothing.

“what brought you back... was the power you’ve honed.”

except... that should have been impossible. because Katsuki was dead. meaning he should not have been able to activate his quirk on his own, on account of the whole “being dead” thing.

however, if he by chance had a quirk with just enough of a mind of its own to activate in critical situations in order to help its user. situations like being forced under mind control. or, perhaps, being stabbed through the heart. well then. that would certainly go a long way towards explaining all of this.

and oh hey, when exactly was it that we saw this guy, again?

oh? it happened at the exact moment when his heart was stabbed through? you don’t say. well that certainly is interesting.

in summary:

Deku cloned his quirk in Heroes Rising and gave Kacchan a copy of OFA. owing to the hyperprotective Deku!Vestige inside Kacchan’s copy of OFA, it shut itself down once Nine was defeated, and all of Katsuki’s memories of having OFA were deliberately wiped, or sealed away. OFA itself remained inactive until TomurAFO stabbed Katsuki through the heart, at which point OFA was forced to reactivate itself to save his life. which it did, by forcibly restarting his heart.

that’s it. no idea how close to the money any of this is, but I think it would explain most of the lingering mysteries and questions about what exactly is going on with Katsuki. and I’ll throw in one last observation as well -- Katsuki has a nine in his name (BaKUgou), but not a ten. which I know sort of contradicts what I was saying earlier about him being the tenth gen, lol. but he both is and isn’t. if Deku split his quirk, Kacchan would in theory receive everything that’s currently in Deku’s quirk right now, and that includes Deku’s own power that he’s been adding to the mix. so he’d still have the Deku!Vestige. but he’s also still ninth gen, because he and Deku are sharing that distinction now. or at least I think the argument could be made at any rate.

so yeah. I’ve been obsessing over all of this for the past few days lol. what do you guys think?

[robintherobiner]

do you have any recs where the batfam (one or more) realizes just how absurd young Justice was— like them blowing up mt. Rushmore, seeing Santa die, playing baseball for the fate of the universe, gun Batman, etc ^-^?

alternatively, fics where the core four delve into villainhood

I can sure try!

glucose guardian - DairyFarmer - Batman (Comics) [Archive of Our Own]

^ 4000 words "In which Tim becomes an unintentional sugar daddy to the caped community."

Tim did WHAT - Chapter 1 - AlyTyler - Multifandom [Archive of Our Own]

^ 1000 words "Tim Drake has done some crazy things in his time... now his brother is finding out."

Tim did WHAT: The Rest of the Family Edition - Chapter 1 - AlyTyler - Batman - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]

^ 250 words "Jason now knows just how crazy Tim is... but does the rest of the family?"

Put a ring on it - Miss_Choco_chips - Multifandom [Archive of Our Own]

^ 6400 words, Core Four gets married

Red Hood's Babysitting Services - why_is_this_a_thing_now - Batman - All Media Types, Batman: Under the Red Hood (2010), DCU, Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics), Young Justice (Cartoon), Young Justice - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]

^ total 67000 "Jason, through a series of unlikely events, finds himself taking care of one Timothy Drake and the rest of the brat's team of teenaged heroes. They only know him as Red Hood, which... MAY cause some issues further down the road."

The dangers of sugar coating - Miss_Choco_chips - Multifandom [Archive of Our Own]

^ 3000 words "Dick tries to give his little brother nice things (and fucks up), Tim is paranoid (and too tired to think clearly), and Damian thinks they might actually be a good team (while they plot Santa Claus’ downfall)."

I do have one of gun-batman, but i think it was deleted since i can't find it TwT so sorry if this isn't exactly what you asked!

[theyanderespecialist]

Base Yandere Tail Lung Headcanons: Becoming Worthy  (Kung Fu Panda) 

[Hello, My Sexy Muffins. Now I did make this into a video BEFORE I made these headcanons. So these headcanons may not be the same as the YouTube video! I hope that you all enjoy and happy Lunar New Year 2024!] 

(Disclaimer: Tail Lung is not yandere in canon! This is just for fun and not to be taken seriously at all! Simping for fictional characters and yanderes is fine, just do not be illegal or gross about it! Yanderes are not ideal partners to have In Real Life. Also, remember to separate fiction from reality and headcanon from canon!) 

(Base Yandere Headcanons With Tai Lung From Kung Fu Panda)

.Tai Lung was once a good person. 

.But the betrayal he faced by his adoptive father and the master changed him, it brought out the very dark and worst side of him. 

.He ended up imprisoned and got to see very few people. 

.You were one of the people that he got to see and he became obsessed with you. 

.To him this obsession was love and he loves you so much that he needs to get out of here and make you his. 

.He is the type of yandere who is very possessive and needs to have you by his side at all times. 

.He is also very protective of you and needs to keep you safe. 

.He will save face for you (That is the right way to say it and not the Western way of defending honor, The whole defend your honor is a very much Western thing in media, and saving face is the proper way to describe those things! I learned this from watching various YouTubers who were born and some who still at least visit China!) and defend you with all their might. 

.He is a man who respects you but is also unstable. 

.He is very close to snapping but he has never taken a life before. 

.He has some morals where he will not kill your loved ones to make you his and he would most likely not kill his rivals. 

.He will defeat his rivals in combat, proving to them and you that he is the right man for you. 

.He has the whole major issue of NEEDING to prove himself to not only you but himself. 

.He needs you to know that he is the best man for you. 

.Also he needs to prove that to himself so he is worthy of you. 

.He still will beat the fuck up out of his rivals that is for sure. 

.When he does confess to you, he is very blunt and straightforward about it. 

.If you say yes, and accept his love, then he did it, he proved to you that he is worthy and you are his now, forever and ever. 

.But, if you say no and turn down his love, he takes it as a betrayal. After all his hard work and all he has done to prove his love for you! 

.This is where he would snap and he would kidnap you. 

.Taking you somewhere remote, where he can teach you to love him, and he will. 

.Because he will make it happen and he will get his happily ever after! 

[YASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS another chapter is done! I hope you all enjoyed this and stay sexy, all of my sexy muffins!] 

[cripplecharacters]

Hi! I am working on a story where one of the three protagonist has a burn scar. This character has from the eye to half their right cheek of a burn; this happened around 9 years ago (the character was 10.)

I am working on historical-fantasy setting, I know you guys are not historians but I was hoping you could help me out with ideas.

In my story, there is a few chapters where the characters go to a snowy mountain for a couple of days, and there are temperatures ranging from 20ºF to 10ºF with snow and harsh wind, is there any protection/possible cream needed for the face and the eye for that situation?

Also, around 10% of the story has fights that include armour (including a helmet to protect the face and the head,) would a character with that type of burn may need a special helmet?

Just to clarify, the character for most of the story doesn't have any mask or anything covering their face, except in the moments of battle where every other character is also using a helmet and armour.

Not sure if there is anything potentially problematic in this, but the character got that injury due to a baby dragon of the family accidentally burning his face (this is a society where dragons are like animals and common in the house.) Because it happened so many years ago there isn't any angst feeling or people in his community commenting about, except in a scene where the protagonists are talking about traumatic things and this character mentioned that they remember when it happened his parents were afraid he was not going to make it, not realizing he was hearing it.

There are other background characters with burns, scars and stumps due to the nature of this world, but I am concentrating in this protagonist right now.

Hi!

For weather this cold, your character would need a LOT of moisturizing creams. Possibly a comical amount. They would help to protect the skin from both the wind and cold. Burn scars don't have the natural oils, so his skin would be very dry normally, let alone during the winter. Even in normal temperatures, it's recommended to apply moisture multiple times a day. If something like sunscreen is available to your character, he would use it too (and often). Burns are sensitive to the sun, and some people use it even when it's cloudy. During the winter it's also commonly used because the snow reflects it. (As you said, I'm very much not a historian and I don't know what would work as non-modern equivalents... I assume that shea butter or olive oils could be on the table here? Certainly better than nothing. Or even just Magical Herb Mixture, if it's fantasy.)

As for the eye protection, I would say that most people in 20ºF to 10ºF (-6ºC to -12ºC) would need it, especially if it's both snowing and windy lol. I have experienced those temperatures and it can be hard to see even without extremely sensitive skin/eyes. But generally yes, harsh wind could be actively painful to someone with a burn scar. If it's too hard on him, he could wear some very loose cloth to cover it (prime example of a scenario where a face covering makes medical and just logical sense). It shouldn't be tight; maybe just a large hood or veil that would still be away from that part of their face.

Note: it could also not be painful at all. Burns come with nerve damage, and sometimes nerves make non-painful stimuli hurt really bad, and sometimes they make it so a person doesn't feel pain when they should. If your character is the second, they would bear it better at the time but still have all the other issues - skin breakdown, contraction, cracking, itching.

Not sure what other kind of eye protection would be available, but even regular glasses would help with the "not getting blasted with wind and snow" part. Make sure that with the protection he wears, it doesn't touch the scar directly. That can be extremely painful and cause skin to break in that kind of environment, especially if he's not a regular at the Snowy Mountain. If they are, they will handle it much better - scars get more or less desensitized with repetitive exposure.

For a helmet, I think having it padded from the inside would be a good idea. Preferably with something relatively smooth (maybe cloth or fur?) so that it doesn't scratch the burn. Potentially something to "stabilize" it (maybe their helmet could be custom-made for their exact head size?) so that it doesn't hit his scar over and over too if it's too large. I appreciate that others characters wear helmets too, and that he does for only a minor part of the story :-) (smile emoji))

The backstory scenario sounds fine to me as well! House pet trying to play and causing an injury is definitely a thing when it comes to facial differences haha. I can imagine that it would be even more common if the pet in question is a dragon and not a regular dog.

Having multiple burn survivors in a world with fire-breathing creatures that live in human homes is a nice element of worldbuilding :) (smile emoji)! I think that if this kind of thing happens often, then some of the resources I mentioned (moisturizes, sunblock) would be more readily available for your main character and people in similar sets of circumstances.

Thank you for your ask, I hope it helped a bit!

Mod Sasza

[otakubimbo]

Checkmate.

MafiaBoss Sukuna x F!Reader

You had a routine. You had a life. You had plans. Is your association with someone you hate going to change everything for you?

Sticky: I was asked to make it into a series so this is the prequel to this! It will be an on going series. I don't know how many chapters yet.

UPDATED STICKY: hi yes, you may be seeing this thinking 'OB this definitely doesn't look like what you wrote before.' and you would be right, i hated it so i changed it. Sorry, love yall, bye T-T

masterlist

next chapter

The activity at the Zenin compound was raising suspicion from their enemies, especially their biggest one The King of Curses. The two yakuza families had been cordial for the most part through the decades, but lately, the hot-headed Naoya Zenin was pushing his way into the King of Curses territory and that would not do, not at all. So, on top of the brazen acts by the end of that family, the activity coming from the compound DAILY was raising all alarms for Ryomen Sukuna.  And the activity? It was you, coming in and out the front gates of the compound almost daily, always bringing something with you, always leaving without anything. The biggest issue, no one had any information on you and yet you were casually coming in and out of the compound as if you were an important member of the Zenin’s. The King of Curses needed to know your role with them and how to use it to his advantage to get Naoya out of his hair for good.

That’s what led to one of the King of Curses disgruntled underlings following you around for the last two weeks. Nothing you did was of interest; you were actually quite boring. Your day consisted of leaving your condo with a bag of who knows what to the Zenin compound, spending a few hours there, and leaving to go to the park not far from the compound to play chess? With old people? It was strange, and then after that, you would leave after seemingly beating every old man who would sit with you and play to go to a café or library to work away at something on your computer.

Sukuna’s face was twisted into a scowl as he read over the report of your day.

“What the fuck is this?” His voice made the men under his command shrink into themselves and back down.

“Sir, that’s all we have. That’s all she does.” One of them spoke up not meeting Sukuna’s glare. The man before them flexes his fingers in an attempt to quell his rage from snapping either of their necks.

“Do you at least have a name; do you have anything?”

The silence from their lack of response was louder than anything they could have said. Sukuna crumbles the report in his hand, balling his fist and banging it against the sturdy wooden desk. He had to think of something. There had to be something he could think of because surprisingly enough despite how arrogant and boisterous Naoya was, the boy kept his circle tight and private. Nothing that the boy doesn’t want out, never gets out. You truly seemed nothing of interest but then no one and he knew NO ONE was allowed to freely walk in and out of that compound so casually without significance. Also, there was something about you that he couldn’t figure out and it was driving him almost insane. He had seen videos in the reports he was being sent of you and the way you walked and carried yourself had him in thought. In thought of what? He really didn’t know but he knew he needed to figure out what your connections with all of this were. Just before he was truly about to lose his temper, he did have an idea. After all, you were a woman so this should at least get a little information out of you.

“Bring me Fushiguro .”

Fushiguro, Toji Fushiguro, was one of Sukuna’s subordinates who would be considered a ‘ladies man’ and you were a lady. It was one of the oldest tricks in the book. He would use Toji to sway you into giving up some type of information or at the very least gain a bit of your trust to get you here to interrogate that wouldn’t draw any suspicions from the Zenin’s. It was a good plan that has worked on more than one occasion. Well, that was what Sukuna assumed until Toji actually met you.

There you were, right on schedule, as usual, laughing at the older man who sat across from you. It seemed that you had been beating him at a round of chess and the old man was being grumpy about it. Toji walked up with his casual nonchalant attitude toward the bench you were sitting on.

“Well, aren’t you a pretty little thing?” Toji commented as he walked up to you. You look up at him, a slight scowl on your face that he wasn’t expecting. Women usually fawn over him always immediately, but you looked almost disgusted. The glares he was getting from the older men around you didn’t help his circumstance either.

“Did you need something?” Your tone is annoyed as you glare up at him. He chuckles at your hostility. That made you scowl even more; you really didn’t want to be bothered by this man especially one as seemingly cocky and self-assured as this one.

“I’ve seen you here at the park a few times and wanted to get your name.” He lied and he could tell you knew it was a lie by the way your eyes narrowed at him.

You roll your eyes, sighing going back to making a move on the board in front of you, “Well I haven’t seen you before so I would prefer not to acquaint myself with you.”

Toji could tell this was going to be a lost cause on his part. Sukuna was not going to be happy about this in the least bit but there wasn’t anything else he could do, your body language told him everything he needed to know. He raised his hands in defeat and apologized for bothering you, heading back to the car parked around the corner. If Toji was a man who didn’t value his life, he would tell the King that he should give up on seeing what you know unless he just wanted to kidnap and torture you. You didn’t seem like the kind of girl to just give in to anything easily, and these soft plans would be a waste of everyone’s time.  But Toji was a man who did value his life at least a little, so he just planned to tell him exactly what happened and that you weren’t interested in speaking to him in the least bit.

Sukuna was frustrated with Tojis report, he couldn’t help but shoot one of the lackeys he had in the room. He didn’t kill him, maybe, but this was getting on his nerves quickly. The King’s attempt at trying to be subtle for once was getting him nowhere and it was pissing him off.

You knew you had been being watched for weeks now; it was almost obvious with the way that the same men kept appearing around the same time every day. They weren’t really good at this, it seemed to you. It didn’t concern you that much though, you understood why you may have been followed but you didn’t have any information of value. Naoya allowed you into the Zenin compound and he was never shy about what he did for a living or the type of man that he was. He didn’t value you as a person, so he allowed you to go and come as you pleased, which you were grateful for. He was a man who such self-assurance, such bravado, such misogyny that he didn’t find any value in hiding anything from you or your cousin that he made his wife. Your cousin, more of a sister to you than anything, was unfortunately the now wife of Naoya Zenin and the only reason you would EVER visit his compound. You hated every single second you spent in that space, but you did it for your cousin. She was trapped in these walls and unable to go anywhere unless it was with the end of the clan himself. The only thing that man allowed was for you to see her and you took that, making it almost your job to visit her every day in order to keep her sanity. You would bring her breakfast, books, snacks, or whatever you have found that could make sure she felt connected with the outside world and connected with something else besides the Zenin’s.

Every day you had almost the same schedule, visiting your cousin for a few hours, discussing the past day’s events and anything that you had brought over. Then you would go over to this beautiful park and play chess with the elders there, they adored you so much even if you beat them every time. After that, you would go off to either the library, a café, or anywhere that you could get back to work on your dissertation. That was the reason you had so much time to visit your cousin and make sure she was alright; you were working on your dissertation and that was the only thing that truly required your focus. You came from a wealthy family that was similar to the zenin’s in the way that there was no value to a woman besides being a bride. Luckily for you, your parents had agreed to allow you to finish any education before marrying you off just like your cousin. Which is why you are currently working on your Ph.D. in comparative literature. You had hoped to continue down the path of education hoping that if you elongate your studies, your parents will focus more on your brothers and forget about you. You hoped.

It had been a while since you had been followed and since your last encounter with that handsome but strange man who attempted to flirt with you for whatever reason that you completely forgot about those interactions. This is why the confusion on your face was felt by the elders that you usually play chess with as you walk to your park in the spot where you play to see them laughing and playing with someone else who isn’t you. It took you WEEKS to have them allow you to play and now here sat a man in YOUR spot playing with them as they laugh and smile at the man.

There in your place sat a man you knew you had never seen before. There sat the King of Curses himself, Ryomen Sukuna.

[wannab-urs]

Outtakes - Long ass fics

AO3 | Kofi | Main Masterlist | The Spreadsheet Masterlist

Howdy folks!

Here's a list of fics I've read that are either over 100k words or have 20+ chapters.

Summaries and tags are, in most cases, provided by the author - please be sure to read them as some of these fics may have content you do not wish to read.

Pedro boys currently included are: Din Djarin, Frankie Morales, Javier Peña, Joel Miller, Dave York, Dieter Bravo, Oberyn Martell, Jack Daniels, and Pedro Across the Street + a Din x Joel fic (no reader insert)

updated 3/27/2024

Din Djarin

Starlight by LovelessDagger | 300k

Summary: Nothing ever truly dies. Not the Empire, not the dark, not her. The Mandalorian should know this, and somewhere deep down he does. Whether he cares is a different story. Consequences and the whole of them be damned.

Tags: Assassins & Hitmen, Enemies to Lovers, Slow Burn, Blood and Violence, Explicit Language. Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Morally Ambiguous Character, OFC, Trauma, Found Family, Betrayal, Secrets, Touch-Starved Din Djarin, Filled with existential dread, Sexual Tension, Heavy symbolism, two idiots with family issues form a family, Past Child Abuse, Mutual Pining, Angst, Eventual Smut, Clones, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Sith, Imperial Inquisitors, Secret Past, No one tells the truth, Metaphorical Addiction

I Only See Daylight by @millersdjarin | 141.6k

Summary: You’ve stayed in one place all this time, knowing that any move to leave could lead them to find you. When a Mandalorian and his child crash land on your home planet, you can't turn them away for help.

Tags: Smut, slow burn, post-canon, trauma, past emotional/physical abuse, relgious trauma, scars, negative self-image, found family, injury, heavy angst, fluff and love

A Fresh Start by @theidiotwhowritesthings | 140k

Summary: When you made plans for your future they never involved being hired by a Mandalorian to baby-sit his adorable, green gremlin of a child. However, after your life fell apart in the span of one disastrous night, you found it to be the only feasible option you had left. Nevarro was a far cry from Coruscant, but the thriving community turned out to be exactly what you needed. Every day you spend in Nevarro you fall more and more in love with your new life, but when your past rears its ugly head you find that perhaps peace wasn’t meant for everyone.

Tags: use of fake name, reader is hiding from a shady past, depressive symptoms, jealousy, pining, angst, hurt/comfort, medical trauma, nightmares, blood, injury, traumatic past, scars, slow burn, shooting training, sick child, fear and panic, canon typical violence, blackmailing, anxiety, self doubt, sexual tension, heavy petting, panic attack, male masturbation, arguing, mentions of alcohol and a bit of binge drinking, angst, people getting drunk, non descriptive torture, murder, fluff, mentions of death, non consensual groping of reader by a stranger, smut, oral f receiving

Stitches by @djarinsbeskar | 190k

Summary: What is a former combat medic to do when an injured Mandalorian stumbles upon her clinic one night on Klatooine?

Tags: Smut, action, fluff, angst, canon-typical violence

Beskar Doll by @justagalwhowrites | 232.4k

Summary: You have a knack for finding trouble, be it in the midst of Galactic Civil War or when trying to live the quiet life after getting out of the game. So when you're stuck fleeing your new home planet after pissing off the wrong people - again - there's only one person willing to take you: the Mandalorian. But after years of fighting faceless men, you're not the trusting type toward someone always wearing a helmet and the Mandalorian quickly suspects there's more to you than he knows.

Tags: Slow Burn, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Canon-Typical Violence, Pre-Canon, Eventual Smut, Eventual Romance, Dry Humping, Torture, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Mando'a Language (Star Wars), Protective Din Djarin, Touch-Starved Din Djarin, Din Djarin Removes the Helmet, Past Domestic Violence, Brat Tamer Din Djarin, Vaginal Fingering, Soft Din Djarin, POV Din Djarin, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Angst, Mandalorian Culture (Star Wars), Mutual Masturbation, Masturbation, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, PIV, Unsafe Sex, Consent King Din Djarin, Din Djarin's Helmet Stays on During Sex, Vaginal Sex, Din Djarin talks you through it, Making Love, Pregnancy

Best Kept Secret by @lincolndjarin | 188k

Summary: Married off to a prince on a planet that you hate? New husband doesn't know you, and doesn't want to know you? New husband gifts you a personal Mandalorian body guard as a wedding present? Mandalorian is a wiseass who won't leave you alone? Lucky you.

Tags: no y/n, Enemies to Lovers, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Smut, Canon-Typical Violence, Princess!Reader, Arranged Marriage, bodyguard!din, Smut, Angst, Fluff and Angst, Eventual Happy Ending, Masturbation, Oral Sex, Glove Kink, Light Dom/sub, Switch Din Djarin, Switch Reader, Body Worship, Din Djarin Has a Breeding Kink, Hate Sex, Creampie, Sex Toys, Anal Play, Overstimulation, Multiple Orgasms, eventual pregnancy (right at the end)

Be-All and Endor by @djarins-cyare | 400k

Summary: Languishing in a dull and lonely existence on the forest moon of Endor after travelling there to help salvage Death Star wreckage, a nearly fatal encounter with a mysterious bounty hunter out in the forest heralds an opportunity to utilise long-forgotten skills and develop something more profound than you ever thought possible.

Tags: Slow Burn, Slow Build, Romance, Love, Sexual Tension, Eventual Smut, Smut, Sex, Sexual Content, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Fluff and Angst, Light Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Relationships, Healthy Relationships, Canon-Typical Violence, Blood and Injury, Dark Past, Additional Warnings In Author's Notes, Bounty Hunter Din Djarin, Soft Din Djarin, Touch-Starved Din Djarin, Din Djarin Needs a Hug, Smart Din Djarin, Soft Dominant Din Djarin, Ewok Species, Mandalorian Culture, Mando'a Language, New Razor Crest, Thoroughly Researched, Worldbuilding, No use of y/n.

A Place of Safety by The_InvisibleWoman (AO3) | 178k

Summary: Persuaded into picking up one last quarry on his way home, an exhausted Mandalorian is in no mood for you, but he slowly begins to think that things are not as they should be. You’ve been on the run for so long and you don’t even know who from, but when you are captured by the bounty hunter, you think it’s all over.

Tags: Smut, slow burn, protective!Din, touch starvation, Din Djarin's point of view, fluff, angst, mutual pining, enemies to friends to lovers, rescue, falling in love, flirting, close proximity, gentle kissing, gentle sex, cuddling, threats of sexual assault, attempted sexual assault, self harm, tickling, noncon

Wrest Pin by BalletOrchard (AO3) | 366k

Summary: “I can help you escape the planet,” Mando said sharply, “But I want information in return.” She looked up at him through the small hairs on her face and she whispered, sounding almost lost…As if she didn’t know what else to say… “I have no information.” Something Mando did not believe.

Tags: panic attacks, force sensitive!reader, unprotected PinV sex, smut, mando is a dick, angst, slow burn (romantically), touch starved!din, bickering, arguing, post season 1, fluff, ofc!evangeline, she like doesn’t get off the first time they fuck which i feel like is worth noting, feelings of regret, minor character death (evangeline’s whole fam), follows canon, mando lowkey keeping evangeline against her will but like she’s hiding from the empire so, near death experience(s), the helmet comes off, oral f receiving, blindfolding, shower sex

Somewhere Beautiful by @peetiespetals | 235k

Summary: You have been working as a slave since the demise of your people and destruction of your planet. A stranger passes through your life and you make a bid for freedom, thwarted by the very man who inspired you to reach for it. In a twist of fate, the two of you are thrown together and must learn how to live with each other as the lines between slave and master begin to blur. Can you really tell the difference between duty and devtion?

Tags: smut, fluff and smut, angst, rough sex, bdsm, abandonment, neglect, physical abuse, love stories, shower sex, mutual masturbation, dom/sub undertones, oral sex, shameless smut, praise kink, bondage, biting, slow burn, spanking, orgasm control, orgasm delay/denial, cock warming, master/slave, vaginal fingering, deep throating, breast worship, pussy spanking, ball play, public creampie, edging, anal sex, foot jobs, handcuffs, cock bondage, panties in mouth, aftercare, jealous din djarin, hurt/comfort, overstimulation, strong female characters, hurt no comfort, porn with plot, sexual tension, porn with feelings, canon typical violence, slow romance, fluff and angst, anxiety, manhandling, pov second person, vaginal sex, nipple play, dirty talk, hair pulling

I Think of You by @prolix-yuy | 107k

Summary: A Mandalorian and a woman spend a night together, neither expecting the other to return. But the galaxy works in mysterious ways and many years later, despite a mission and a Creed and the cruelty of their lives, they find each other again and begin a journey of their own.

Tags: graphic smut, drinking, smoking, dirty talk, The Helmet Stays On, safe PiV sex, drinking, suggestive language, canonical-typical violence. mentions of past sexual experiences, angst and yearning, female masturbation, grinding, descriptions of male and female bodies, illness (not graphic), fingering (f receiving), male masturbation, sexy massage, hand kink, mutual masturbation, fingers in mouths, semi-unprotected PiV sex, descriptions of injuries, blood, and medical-ish procedures, allusions to sexual acts, hurt/comfort

Tied by @radiowallet | 26 chapters

Summary: Dr. Din Djarin is the top cardiothoracic surgeon in his field. His work is meticulous, his judgment unquestionable. And then he get’s a new first assist, who couldn’t give two shits about anyone’s reputation.

Tags: Smut, Cursing, Graphic violence, some questionable power dynamics.

Take Me to Church by @frannyzooey | 31 chapters

Summary: Set in a brothel in the late 1800’s in the Wild West, you’ve only been working there for a month when Din Djarin shows up. A bounty hunter who makes stops into town between jobs, he is known at the inn for his generous appetite and demanding preferences. Asking for you one night, he is pleased to learn you are well suited for him: your sweet nature soothing to his gruff temperament and surprising him with your ability to handle his rougher tastes. Demanding that you be made available to him every time he is in town, neither one of you is ready for where this request leads.

Tags: MFF, oral sex (female/male receiving), vaginal sex, dirty talk, mentions of murder, rope play, mutual masturbation, idk man lots of smut

Losing My Religion by @oonajaeadira | 108k

Summary: A Mandalorian comes looking for you with an assignment from an old friend, sending you on a mission and a union that you both need.

Tags: Smut, canon-typical violence, post-season two canon, reader is force sensitive, alternating point of view, angst, fluff, yearning, mind control, injuries, mourning a lost spouse, alcohol, feelings of betrayal, touch starvation, implied masturbation, kissing, bounty hunter kink, grinding and fingering, Mando'a language

A Shade That's New by FallenFern (AO3) | 111k

Summary: After Mando and Grogu part he goes back to bounty hunting. But its not enough. Desperate to feel again Mando accepts a more dangerous line of work. He joins your small crew on a new job, putting you in close proximity wether you like it or not. Wary of anyone, especially Mandalorians, you try to keep him at arms length. After all, anyone and everyone could be an enemy and you were going to treat him like one.Yeah, thats lasts long…

Tags: OFC!Shade, described as smaller than Mando, curly or wavy hair, able bodied, can blush/flush, Alternating 2nd Person POV. Smut, making shit up, not canon, after grogu and AU, emotional pain, plot with porn, enemies to lovers, slow burn, trauma, sexual tension, action and romance, blood and injury, blood kink, the helmet stays on, but it also comes off, blindfold, light bondage, sexual assualt, threats of rape (not by Mando), praise kink, begging, semi public sex, blaster kink, cock warming, daddy mando, oral sex (f and m receiving), smut marathon, I’ll kill anyone that touches you trope, demanding mando, comfort sex, minor character death, betrayal, mando to the rescue, revenge, reunion sex, say my name trope, edge play, rough sex, throat grabbing but not exactly choking

Frankie Morales

Between the Raindrops by Jazzelsaur (AO3) | 148k

Summary: Two lives fall apart, then together. A journey told in parts and pieces. Frankie’s life is coming apart at the seams, when Ellie, a widow facing her own share of struggles, moves in next door. Together they find friendship, healing, and something more.

Tags: Widowed reader, divorced frankie, neighbors to friends to lovers, grief, mourning, angst, masturbation, pining, allusions to sex, eventual smut, slow burn, past drug use, alcohol, infertility, miscarriage mention, ptsd, handjobs, oral sex, smut, food, strained friendships, healing, allusions to verbal abuse, angst with a happy ending, idiots in lovedivorced!Frankie, widow!OC/reader, no one has kids, slow burn with great spicy scenes, smut! with plot

Sex Worker!Frankie AU by @prolix-yuy | 21 chapters

Summary: You’d never thought you’d be sitting on a hotel room bed, phone to your ear as you waited for someone on the other end to pick up. After a messy divorce you wanted something to ease the pain of loneliness. That something just happens to be the most gorgeous man you’ve ever seen, even if you had to pay for him.

Tags: Sex Worker!Frankie, implied other Triple Frontier Boys!Sex Workers, watch me make up shit about sex work, descriptions of male and female bodies, oral sex (F receiving), like super descriptive oral (there might be over 2500 words dedicated to Frankie’s talents), female masturbation, fingering (f receiving), safe PiV sex, a touch of Feral Frankie, one ass slap, fingers in mouths, some angst and feelings sprinkled in there for flavor.

Frankie Morales Box Set by @frannyzooey | 20 chapters

Summary: A series of one shots in which Frankie Morales shows you just how much he likes movie night.

Tags: oral, PIV, cum eating, hand job, cockwarming, mutual masturbation, dirty talk, thigh riding, dry humping, lots of other shit

Javier Peña

Lie to Me by @iamskyereads | 151.8k

Summary: A recent transfer to the DEA from the FBI makes you a target of hazing from your co-workers. Choosing to forget your bad first day at a bar puts you on a path towards meeting a new acquaintance. An expert on deception and psychological profiling, you are adept at catching liars. What happens when an increasingly stressful work environment begins to test the limits of your personal life and the one man at the center of it all, Javier Peña? Afterall, everybody lies about something. But how many are you keeping from yourself?

Tags: An AU of Season 3 of Narcos.Language, Alcohol/Drinking, Smoking, POV Switches, assholery, office pranks/hazing, hatin on the FBI and the DEA too, but we all hate on the CIA the most, Praise Kink, Dirty Talk, thigh grinding, PIV sex, soft Javi, Pining, Sexual Frustration, Use of A Sex Toy, Edging, Oral Sex, Canon-Typical Violence, Guns, police raids, Parallel plots to the show, Smut, sloppy blowjobs, Shower Sex, Social Anxiety, Nightmares, Rough Sex, spitting, Semi-Public Sex, Office Sex, Love in an Elevator, death of background characters, kidnapping of background characters, Shootouts, Masturbation, Breeding Kink, discussions of fertility, kink negotiations, Spanking, Brat behavior, Mild D/s vibes, Creampie, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Sex in a Church, Unprotected Sex, TacVest!Javi, Orgasm Denial, Angst with a Happy Ending, Period-Typical Sexism, Hospital, scar, accident of background characters, historical classism/sexism/racism, Grief/Mourning, Body Insecurities, Cockwarming, threats of kidnapping reader, light teasing, Flirting

Learning to Live by @wheresarizona | 382k

Summary: While grocery shopping, you happen across a handsome man confused by some produce. Coming to his aid leads to an invitation for drinks, and next thing you know, you’re falling head over heels for Javier Peña—a good man who has trouble believing he is. Sparks fly when you meet and ignite an insatiable need that you both try to fight for the sake of taking things slow; Javi determined to do things right by you. The problem is, the two of you only have so much self-control.

Tags: Post-Colombia and Narcos S3, Story Starts in June 1998.POV Alternating, Soft Javier Peña, Meet-Cute, First Dates, Javier Peña Needs a Hug, Whirlwind Romance, Javier Getting the Love and Happiness He Deserves, Javier Is Stubborn At First, Javier Peña in Love, Javier Being a Consent King, Multiple Orgasms, Vaginal Fingering, Dirty Talk, Praise Kink, Hand Jobs, Come Eating, Phone Sex, Mutual Masturbation, Vaginal Sex, Creampie, Cunnilingus, Blow Jobs, Edgeplay, Body Worship, Shower Sex, Biting Javis Butt, Deepthroating, Biting, Javier Coming So Hard His Soul Leaves His Body, Spanking, Car Sex, Dry Humping, Public Thigh Riding, Face-Sitting, Dirty Dancing, Post-Sex Smoking, Aftercare, Feelings, Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Slow Dancing, Protective Javier Peña, Jealous Javier Peña, Getting Tipsy With Javier, Javier In Grey Sweatpants, Alcohol, Small Towns, Food, Road Trips, Post-Canon, Face-Fucking, Breeding, Rimming, Anal Play, Romantic Comedy, Cockwarming, Grief/Mourning, past relationship trauma, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Horseback Riding, Love Confessions, Miscommunication, Arguing, Angst with a Happy Ending, Period-Typical Sexism, Canon Typical Drug Talk, Nude Photos, Overstimulation, Dysfunctional Family

Just Dumb Enough to Try by @whatsnewalycat | 108k

Summary: In 1993, you met Javier Peña in San Antonio. You made an emotional and physical connection with him. Now it’s 1998 and you’re starting a new chapter of life in Laredo with your fiancé. And who else walks back into the picture, but the man who left you high and dry five years ago.

Tags: alcohol use, Binge Drinking, Swearing, Recreational Drug Use, Cigarettes, Voyeurism, Smut, Bisexual main character, Touch-Starved, Female Masturbation, Vaginal Sex, Unprotected Sex, Dirty Talk, Teasing, Flirting, Mutual Pining, Cheating, Infidelity, Sexual Tension, Attempt at Humor, Soft Javier Peña, Movie Nerd Shit, use of daddy in a sexual context, Vulnerable Javier Peña, Angst and Feels, Family Issues, Mostly Post Season 3, Existential Crisis, Banter, Mental Health Issues, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, friends to lovers to friends to lovers, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Fluff and Humor, Oral Sex, Slow Burn, No beta idk I just got here, Fluff and Smut, Not Canon Compliant, Impact Play, Pain Kink, Domestic Violence, Praise Kink, Unplanned Pregnancy, Breeding Kink, Blood and Violence, Mild Gore, Kidnapping

Joel Miller

Feelings on Fire by @joelscruff | 110k

Summary: Back from school for the summer and staying with your devout Catholic parents, you ask Joel Miller to teach you guitar as an act of rebellion. Turns out, there's a lot more that he wants to teach you too...

Tags: Smut, age gap (reader is in her 20s, Joel is in his mid 50s), inexperienced/virgin reader, loss of virginity, corruption, mentions of religion/Catholicism, praise kink, pet names (babygirl, sweetheart, darling), dirty talk, masturbation, unprotected penetrative vaginal sex, creampies, cumplay, oral sex (female and male receiving), exhibitionism, size kink

Lavender by @justagalwhowrites | 253k

Summary: You're a college student in Austin, Texas, who gets a summer job nannying Sarah Miller. It's not long before her dad sees you as more than a babysitter - or more than a friend. But life - and an apocalypse - have other plans.

Tags: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Pre-Canon, Friends to Lovers, Protective Joel, Parent Joel, Joel is Bad at Feelings, Soft Joel, Fluff and Smut, Fluff, Angst, Smut, Vaginal Sex, Oral Sex, Loss of Virginity, Miscarriage, Sexual Coercion

Closer by @beardedjoel | 193k

Summary: you are staying with your parents, helping them move into their new house in austin. what happens when joel miller, the attractive neighbor you've been eyeing obsessively starts to show you some much wanted attention?

Tags: smut, age difference (joel is 42 and reader is 25), porn with some plot, inexperienced reader, soft!dom joel, boyfriend! joel, possessive! joel, mutual masturbation, rough sex, spanking, creampie, unprotected piv, oral (m + f receiving), dirty talk, overstimulation kink, praise kink, so many pet names it’s not even funny, consensual somnophilia, cockwarming

Yearling by @justagalwhowrites | 186k (as of ch 27)

Summary: After years of surviving in the wilds of Wyoming after the cordyceps outbreak, you find yourself in Jackson. It's a town filled with friendly faces and the kind of world you hardly remember, let alone can connect with or understand. But one man - Joel Miller, another loner, like you - makes you think that trying to find your place in society again might be worth it.

Tags: Slow Burn, Hurt/Comfort, Protective Joel, Parent Joel, Angst, Soft Joel, Smut, Eventual Smut, Eventual Romance, Past Sexual Abuse, Friends to Lovers

Hot and Heavy by @tieronecrush | 130k

Summary: Over the course of three summers, Joel Miller has become woven into the fabric of your life. You nanny his daughter, sneaking around in an illicit love affair. You keep coming home, and he keeps coming back to you. The last summer, you're home with no plans of leaving—and Joel seeks you out again. What chances do you have?

Tags: Neighbor!Joel, age gap, canon-divergence, no outbreak, alcohol consumption, mentions of food, pet names (sweetheart), familial and self pressure, reader is in college, nanny!reader, smut

Dave York

Notes on Tutoring by @honestly-shite | 189.9k

Summary: Mr. York becomes your new classical guitar tutor in your final year at music college. A dark, mysterious man, you struggle to get a read on him but that doesn’t stop you from finding many ways to push his buttons.

Tags: Smut, alternate universe, music college, age gap, teacher/student relationship, slow burn, PiV sex, power dynamics, angst, pining, alcohol and drinking

Dieter Bravo

Recovery Road by @chronically-ghosted | 108k

Summary: Dieter Bravo is on his last chance. Six months out of a two year stint in rehab, his marriage on the rocks, and his starlight fading, he reunites with an old director friend on a project that might save his career and his personal life in a single go. Enter Natalie Lorraine, his new enigmatic co-star. Together, they go on to lead a film that comes to define a generation – and are both mysteriously absent the night the film receives an Oscar for Best Picture. Their reasons for missing such a landmark event are their own.

Tags: Smut, age gap (Dieter is 35, reader is 22), drug usage, alcohol, smoking, infidelity, discussions of addiction and withdrawal, toxic relationships, masturbation, pining, angst, anxiety and anxiety attacks, mental illness, bad coping mechanisms, named reader, descriptions of reader's hair, bi!Dieter

Psychomanteum by @whatsnewalycat | 132.7k

Summary: You’ve recently taken on the customer-facing responsibilities of the small-scale cannabis bakery you and your late husband ran out of your apartment, which introduces you to occasional customer, Dieter Bravo. A friendship is sparked when you realize you have something in common: you’ve both died. What Dieter doesn’t tell you about his near-death experience, though, is that it foretold his life with you.

Tags: Smut (including - alternating power dynamics, consensual unprotected sex, penetrative vaginal sex, oral sex, anal sex), gried, alternating point of view, physical descriptions of OFC (including - tattoos, scars, being lifted by Dieter), drug use (including - smoking cannabis and consuming edibles, dropping acid, drinking alcohol, cocaine and morphine use), substance abuse, addiction, fame & paparazzi, canon divergent, suicidal thoughts and planning, divorce, near-death experiences, Bi4Bi romance, supernatural elements, ghosts and psychomanteums, spirituality, drag performance, long-distance relationship, friends to lovers dynamic, OFC is infertile, familial and relationship trauma - please refer to chapters for all warnings.

For the Love of Horror by @coulsons-fullmetal-cellist | 80 chapters

Summary: Dieter meets and falls in love with someone who absolutely loves horror films. The problem is, he's a big scaredy cat!

Tags: loose fit series, series of one shots and drabbles, tags on each chapter

Oberyn Martell

In Name Only by @forever-rogue | 21 chapters

Summary: Reader, the only daughter of late Lord and Lady Beesbury, is sent off to be married to Prince Oberyn Martell. After having been parted from her first love by her horrid mother, she refuses to marry a man she does not know or love and be pushed into a life of misery. But after threat of being cut off from everything she knew and loved, she finds herself leaving her home in Honeyholt and arriving in Sunspear, married to the Prince. Being the charming and kind Prince he is, Oberyn promises her that it does not have to be a true marriage, it can be a marriage in name only. Little does the newly anointed Lady Martell know, that being married to the Prince is so much more than she bargained for.

Tags: Smut, language, fluff, kissing, period-typical misogyny, angst, sensual touching, mentions of violence and injury, discussions of pregnancy, mentions of death

Jack "Whiskey" Daniels

Down the Rabbit-Hole by @absurdthirst, @wardenparker | 208k

Summary: When Jack accidentally shoots a civilian on a mission he takes on not only the guilt of the man’s death, but inherits his soulmate as well. To you, it’s a dream job with more perks than you can imagine - but for Jack it’s a nightmarish complication. Even more so when he starts to develop feelings.

Tags: mentions of deceased spouse, a lot of food and alcohol consumption, family recipes, age gap, cursing, Canon typical violence, Death, gun use, angst, Jack has a temper and Tequila has a dumb first name, Making Out, a bit of groping, heavy flirting, sexy shower time, a whole truck load of anger, Fisticuffs, a bunch of angry people being upset with each other, Kidnapping, Torture, burning victim with cigarettes, Broken Bones, a whole lot of gun pointing and talk about murder, medicine by injection, oral sex (f and m receiving), Outdoor Sex, Public Sex, Unprotected Sex, Vaginal Sex, Cream Pie, Cum Play, Anxiety, Accidental Hurt, panic attack (symptoms based on my own personal experiences), intrusive/racing thoughts, physical symptoms of anxiety, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Guilt, Possible Unwanted Pregnancy, Lies, Nausea/Illness, Talk of Abortion, canon typical injuries, Family Planning, Mentions of Sex Toys, Lingerie, Spanking, rough sex, Flirty and somewhat explicit banter, Pregnancy, Discussion of symptoms, Mood Swings, cemetery/deceased loved ones, speaking to deceased loved ones

Pedro Across The Street (Calls)

Good. Things. Take. Time. by @oonajaeadira | 22 chapters

Summary: PATS is a massage therapist with special services. Or so he claims. He gives you a three-hour session you’re both going to enjoy.

Tags: Explicit marathon wall to wall smut, masseuse!PATS, sex worker!PATS.

Din Djarin x Joel Miller

Cosmic Oddities by fromthewhales (AO3) | 106k

Summary: Turning a clan of two into a clan of four and asking the very important, albeit unhinged question: What if space dad and apocalypse dad were Weird About Each Other?

Tags: parental bonding, parallels, angst, everyone has issues, everyone needs a hug, touch starved din djarin, injuries, strangers to ??? to lovers, smashing the space western and the zombie western together like 2 ken dolls, trauma, crack-fic adjacent at times, hurt/comfort, soft not super explicit smut, self harm, found family, din djarin eventually removes the helmet, blindfold, long distance relationship, survivors guilt, angst with a happy ending, non sexual intimacy, it gets worse before it gets better, alcohol mention, game II canon divergent — but boy does it come close, canon typical violence, minor character death, major character injury, bi!din djarin, bi!joel miller

Various

The Infinity Cube by @littlemisspascal | 20 chapters

Summary: When you play with a strange cube, you’re transported out of your current reality with your boyfriend Marcus into brand new ones starring alternate versions of your boyfriend who look and act entirely different every time. With each encounter, you start to wonder if you’ll ever make it back to your real universe?

Tags: language, fluff, angst

[turquoizxe]

𝐉𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐅𝐨𝐫 𝐘𝐨𝐮

Hobart “Hobie” Brown x Spider!Fem!Reader

Author’s Note: I just want to sincerely apologize for the delay in this post, as I have been traveling out of my hometown the past few days. However, my favorite punk is still my current brain rot lmao. The second installation is already in progress, and hopefully as I have planned, it will be out by the date I posted below( after the conclusion of the first chapter). Thank you all for for love you showed on the series announcement! As I have stated in my earlier post, I haven’t written a fan fiction in over two years, dealing with school and other things in life. Please express your thoughts throughout the series and comment! I was a little nervous because I’ve never written anyone from the UK, especially with such a thick accent. Please, share your thoughts. Thank you for your understanding, and you may begin reading.

With Love,

— Turquoizxe.

Installation (1/5) : ‘Dodgy’ 

Rating ― Mature (17+)

➝ Hobie has been distancing himself quite a bit lately. You feel froggy enough to follow him and enter the world, to what is known to be the Spiderverse. He seems to enjoy your brave gesture, but he quickly realizes why you weren’t invited to join the club.

𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙣𝙩 ―fluff, heavily plot based, meeting existing ATSV Characters…

𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 ― ATSV SPOILERS! Minor use of language and swearing, romantic tension, minor acts of violence, Hobie’s teasing, Miguel being himself, Beef w/ Jessica Drew…

𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩 ― 3.6k

Dodgy;  can be a synonym for dangerous, bad or untrustworthy

As much as you kept to yourself, it was hard to imagine that you would make any friends outside of your suite mates. Your eyes were always harassing a piece of literature, involved in extracurricular activities, and keeping track of random facts no one would need in their everyday lives. Nothing short of the perfect student.

"[Name], this is the fifth time you’ve been in my office in two weeks-”

“Okay, four if you don’t count the rant about my psychology professor.”

You were always an academic achiever, graduating with honors and holding the title of salutatorian in your class. Being accepted into your dream school, earning enough scholarships to cover most of your tuition.

Yet, here you were, looking for ways to save your grades with finals around the corner. Had it been a year ago, you wouldn’t have to worry. That was until you were bit by a radioactive spider the one time you decided to skip studying and attend the most underwhelming frat party that your suite was raving about.

“You’re on the verge of losing your scholarships. $25,000 a year on the line, and you tell me all the time about how hard to your parents are working to cover the rest of your tuition.”

And you knew you couldn’t afford to stay if you didn’t work your ass off to pull through. You didn’t think being spider-woman could be so stressful. Patrols have gotten more hectic, and the late nights have been affecting your attention span in class, and even less energy to do your work. It felt so easy in the beginning, and everything was good until it wasn’t.

You felt a sting on your cheek, your tears sliding past your injury from patrol, and you felt yourself become small as you placed your face in your hands, wondering how something you’ve worked so hard for is a letter grade away from being lost.

Your counselor heaves a heavy sigh, sliding tissues across their desk to you. In just a few weeks you went from acquaintances to friends.

“Look, you’re a great kid, we didn’t have this issue your freshmen year. I know it only gets tougher from here, but you can’t fight this on your own. It’s never too late to accept help.” They started typing on their computer, ringing up your transcript and current grades for the semester. A sudden swish of wind flows through the office, following the trills of birds off in the distance your counselor scoffs at the noise and walks over to close the window. They return back to their seat, muttering intelligible, the only word you could pick up, ‘spiderwoman’.

“What about spiderwoman?”

“Oh! I just kinda thought how weird it was for another spiderman to show up when we already have a hero. Funny, I didn’t know there could be multip-”

“There’s a spider-man?”

You stammered. You felt a heat in your body, another superhero here that you weren’t even sure about.

“As much as you know about everything, I thought you would hear about the spotting of a spider-man in the city. They seem to stick close to campus.”

“Any proof?”

“No. Just words, but if there’s one spider-person, why not two?”

You could feel your blood course through your veins from the new information. It was just you, unless your old mentor, Peter, came to visit. You were knocked out of your thoughts when your name was called.

“As of now, you have a 2.0,″ your counselor stated. “Your classes seem more work oriented, and out of your five classes, you only have two finals.”

You slowly looked up from your lap.

“I’ve read the syllabus, taken notes of what to study for and what to work on. It’s just-”, you stammer, not able to give them the honest truth.

“See? You already took the steps to better yourself, don’t stress, and pace yourself, you have a month left kid.”

You let out a small chuckle. More than 20 missing assignments shouldn’t be too bad to juggle, right?

You were lying to yourself, you were going to suffer, but for a positive outcome, you didn’t mind. You got yourself together, sniffling softly as you packed your things.

“I don’t wanna kick you out, but I do have to meet with the Dean-”

“You mean your lov-”

You were cut short by a small stuffed animal flying towards you, your reflexes doing you justice before the soft material made contact with your face, slamming the door, gaining a small audience as eyes turned to you.

“Sorry everyone.”

Now, for the real fun to begin, you can at least spend some time with a special someone before your academic weapon tendencies are in full force.

The night you met him, it felt like one of those nightmares that would be impossible to wake from. To you, it was a dream.

His aura, and appearance on that stage. You were enamored with his attitude. His thick accent, strumming his guitar as his eyes bored into yours. This was one of the few times you didn’t mind that you skipped class for.

After the concert, you went to refill your water bottle before your walk back to your apartment in the damning heat. You saw him, drenched in sweat, guitar on his back, hunched over, and visibly upset that the water fountain was not doing it’s job. He looks in your direction, his expression making you anxious. Yet, you were still willing to help. You essentially escorted him to your dorm, where the water system was in a decent condition. He had pretty strong opinions about the education system and society in general, though you did appreciate his intellect.

“It’s a load of tosh for ya’ to pay so much for a piece of rubbish.” 

The ways he seemed so sure of himself more often than not made you intrigued, and he was more than happy to indulge you, being nearly distracted from the fact that Satan decided to sit his bare ass cheeks on the Earth that day. He gave you his number, and from then on, he would come see you whenever you both had the time, which was rough, considering the current mess that was your life. He was the only person you felt cared enough to step you out of your comfort zone. 

The night walks on campus, your medusa piercing that he compliments all the time.

“It accentuates your features. Peng ting you are, yeah?”

Your eyebrows furrowed, a deep chuckle erupting from his throat

“Means you’re hot.”

He gets it. He gets you. And sometimes, you thought that maybe what you were feeling would never go away when you’re with him. Your hangouts were more often casual, leading to more intimate moments, mentioning him to your family, and him teaching you how to play his guitar. You began to feel it linger, when you knew you both didn’t want to say goodnight.

The immediate thought of it also breaks you.

You’ve felt that he’s been dodging you and your attempts to reach out as of late. It’s been weeks since you’ve last seen Hobie, and this time, he initiates to meet. It’s late in the night, and he’s late. You couldn’t remember the last time you were this mad at him, or if you ever got upset with him at all. You didn’t like how he started to drift away with no explanation, and instead of anger, you were filled with worry, wondering if the time you were spending together was beginning to put a strain on him. You paced around your living room, muttering words and contemplating sending an annoyingly long paragraph of a text that would make it seem like you were dumping him.

“S’mitten for me, are you love?”

You looked up at your window, the tall brit leaning on the emergency stairs, making himself at home as you pulled away.

“In your dreams, Brown.”

He walks up to you, his lanky frame hovering over you so expectantly. You looked down at your feet, almost embarrassed of your newfound feelings, and you feel even more giddy when he stands close to you. He knew that you liked him, but teasing you was his second favorite pastime besides hanging out with you. You walked away to your kitchen, grabbing an energy drink for the both of you. Silence did not exist when you were together, and the awkwardness of it all was not helping. He bit his lip, his teeth caught in his piercing. He knew he was in trouble.

“I know you’re upset.”

“Hobs, you were supposed to be here 2 hours ago, I understand being busy but I thought you were seriously hurt or something”, you exclaimed, turning away from him. Showing up late was a recurring issue with him, and you’ve had just about enough.

“Oh don’t get cheeky now. You’ve been neglectin’ your studies. A bit daft if you ask me.”

You’re eye twitched at his use of his slang, sometimes you didn’t always need him to explain to know that what he was saying had negative connotations.

“That’s none of your concern, it’s you I’m worried about.”

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” he smirks. There wouldn’t be a point in arguing with him about this, handing him his drink, turning on your television, starting the episode of your favorite series where you had both left off.

You sat farther away from him than usual, occasionally glancing in his direction, and unfortunately, he was staring right back at you, even more intense.

“I don’t bite, unless ya’ ask,” he teases, softly patting a seat closer to him, and you oblige. It wasn’t like you weren’t happy to see him, and he chuckles at your annoyed compliance. It was becoming an awkward staring contest, and you quickly lost track of the media playing on your screen. You open your mouth, just out of curiosity.

“So, how’s life treating you?”

“Fighting fascists, new piercings, performin’, ” he looks over to you, taking another sip of his drink, awaiting for a life update on your part. You bit your lip, anxiety getting the best of you. Despite the closer proximity, you still felt to far away from him. He sighs, using his leg to move your body to face him. You quiver, tears threatening to spill from your face once again, but you still looked up.

He looked at you, seeming nonchalant, but you still felt the worry in his aura.

“I know you want me to squash it, but it’s obvious s’omething bigger is bothering you,” he softly speaks, his thumb circling into your knee. “You act as if you’re scared of somethin’— of someone.”

Hobie scoots closer to you, using guiding your chin to make you look at him directly for the first time tonight.

“Talk t’me.”

You shake away from him, that feeling in the pit of your stomach only becoming more intense.

“I can’t tell you everything, Hobs.”

“But you can tell me anythin’, yeah?”

You look up, his face was close to you now, not realizing that you were nothing leaning into each other the more you spoke. His hand, slowly sliding to your hips, slowly stroking your stretch marks that your shirt wasn’t covering. You looked into his eyes, a small smile showing.

“There she is,” he exaggerates, giving you a soft squeeze, and you let out a giggle. The moment was yet again, cut short by that annoying ass beep from his wristwatch, that has interrupted your meaningful conversations countless times. Hobie curses from under his breath, backing away from you, the light illuminating his flawless features. And just like that, the moment has passed. His eyes look up to you, disproval in your expression, and you knew what was coming next, so you did it for him.

“Just go.”

Hobie let out a deep sigh before apologizing for what felt like the thousandth time, knowing he would do this the next time you make an attempt to make time for each other.

But this time, you were going to figure out why.

—

As soon as he had left, your senses went off. And this was the last time you were going to ignore them.

You had quickly went off into your room after he left, frantically throwing around your belongings to find your suit before Hobie got too far from you. You had followed him, all the way to an one of the abandoned buildings on campus that was currently under renovation. You stood behind a slab of concrete, peeking from the side, watching as he walked through a portal as if it were just another day.

But you saw, and now you knew. Your suspicions proved you right once again.

You flicked your wrist, webbing into the portal before it closed in on you.

And now, there you were, caught by Hobie after catching your ankle so you wouldn’t plunge to certain death after following him through his portal, seeking nothing but a dark abyss before you, seeming bottomless.

You turned towards him, a smirk plastered across his face.

“I fuckin’ knew it.”

You webbed free from his grip, finding ground. You looked at his appearance, and now you knew why he wore such familiar colors. Your suit hugged your body, adorned in your favorite colors, riddled with black accents. Hobie looked you up and down, whistling in admiration, while you took in your surroundings. HQ did not look like this at all when you first arrived.

“Place look familiar?”

You had brushed yourself off, taking in the countless people that had suits similar to yours. The unique design of the interior, and many, many, familiar faces.

“The Spiderverse.”

“Hey I call it the same thing!”

You turned in the direction of the speaker, a young boy standing in front of you. He had a black suit, red accents riddled across, two other spider men following behind you, staring at you in admiration.

“I’m Miles!”

You were still floored by all that had occurred in just a few moments. Slowly, you raised your hand, waving to the kid, smiling at him.

“Hi Miles, I’m [Name].”

“Oh, Hobie! Did we get a new recruit?”

A spider woman in a white suit walked up behind him, her pink hair flowing, and eyes that could manipulate a way to your heart.

“I’m Gwen, and this one here Is Pavitr!” Both greet themselves which such joy to see you. You almost felt as if you were back home, introducing yourself to who seemed to be Hobie’s colleagues. You expected him to be upset with you for following him, or keeping your identity as spiderwoman a secret, or vice versa. Yet, he’s seeing you in a new light, a personality that didn’t exist in your world. You would only ever smile like this if it was truly something or someone you cared about. You both would know that.

“Alright kids, follow me!”

The voice felt all too familiar, the oozing confidence in her demands making you cringe instantly, and you turn to see no other than Jessica Drew herself. You stared blankly, a sigh of irritation, your bubbly personality disappearing almost instantly.

“Jessica..”

She started at you, her face turning into a small scowl before turning back around, motioning the group of teens to follow her, but not before throwing a day pass in your direction. It was hard for them to pay attention when they were too focused on your sudden change of demeanor. Hobie walked beside you, brushing against your hand to catch your attention.

“What’s the tea with you two, ey?”

Your side eye is critical when you look towards him, signaling that you didn’t want to talk about it. He grunts before shrugging it off, still walking close to you. You watched Miles as he introduced himself to everyone, completely enamored with his surroundings. All that you could conclude from this, is that he was new. But while he was looking at everyone else, they were all looking at you. You heard the mutters and whispers amongst them as the HQ went into a deafening silence. You could feel Hobie’s gaze on you, sliding his arm around your waist for comfort.

“Piss off. Go back to what you were doin’.”

Quickly, they did what they were told, but you could still hear the voices of some conversing about you. And Hobie could hear it too.

“I didn’t think they’d let her come back.”

“Maybe they caught her sneaking in, they did say she never gave her watch back.”

He looks to your side, still silent as he watches your body tense up from their words. Maybe he wasn’t the only one acting dodgy.

You look ahead, looking at the lair that belongs to the man you used to call your boss. You felt Hobie release his grip from you to catch up with Miles, watching closely as he walked around him, fidgeting with materials and grabbing small objects. The young teen seemed stressed about something, making you just as anxious. You heard him expressing his frustrations about not having a watch, Hobie suggesting to Miles that he make his own.

You had forgotten how big this room was, and you wished it was longer by the time you got to the main event. He descended from his pad, multiple screens could be seen, one of which you could see showed your last conversation with Hobie at your apartment. Miles and Gwen walked up to him, Miles eager to introduce himself, holding a small box of food. Hobie held you back, watching you stare at the sight before you in amazement.

The moment quickly dissipated once you saw the Miguel everyone knew, his violence showing its face rather quickly, throwing an item in Miles direction. With quick reaction, your web caught onto the object, throwing it to a forgotten corner, showing yourself to him. He chuckled, his expression gleamed with frustrations and anger.

“I knew you would be here.”

“Your favorite disappointment could never miss out on a good time.”

Glaring at one another, everyone could feel the tension, so thick it was possible to cut it with a knife. Hobie watched from afar, reading for whatever should come next. That is until you felt the joyous cries of a child, turning to see a grown man in a pink robe. Instantly, you felt a wave of tears washing over you, Peter calling your name as soon as you ran into his arms.

“I missed you kid.”

Miles shared the excitement, walking up to Peter, also capturing him in an embrace. Miles looked at you in awe once more, wondering how you knew him.

“He was my mentor.”

“That’s crazy, me too!”

You heard Miguel groan, echoing throughout the room, Peter ignoring him, and telling you and Miles to do the same. You once again here the coos of a child, looking in the direction, a baby crawling across the wall. You excitedly exclaim with Miles, “You had a baby!”

Peter laughs sheepishly, yelling for his daughter, telling her to make sure she kept her day pass on, clearly in her own world.

Once again, the atmosphere changed dramatically, Miguel stepping down from his pad, Miles following, both engaging in a rather lengthy conversation about canon events. That’s when you started to shake, Gwen and Hobie looking at you with worry. Still, you held your ground, listening to Miguel explain the Spiderverse to Miles, the timelines, and the unfortunate events that occurs to just about every Spider-person. You saw the young teen grow anxious, beginning to mention his dad, and how he becomes captain in just a few days. Miles grows impatient and restless, and arguing that he shouldn’t sit here and let his father die. Miles looked to his colleagues, searching for confirmation. They all looked away, proving the timeline to be correct. Miguel turns toward you, motioning Miles to look in your direction.

“Your friend here believed the same thing.”

You felt everyone’s eyes on you, feeling as small as Miguel once made you feel. You looked at Miles, ready to hang onto every word you as you began to open your mouth to speak, but you looked away.

“Go on, tell him, [Name].”

You sucked up your sniffles, having to relive that memory constantly felt dehumanizing.

“I….I had a friend, who believed the same thing you did. She wanted to be able to save her parents, to be able to do both, and live the perfect life.”

You felt your chest tighten, yet urged yourself to continue.

“I ended up getting her killed, and destroyed her Universe.”

You heard Miles let out a gasp, you looked to Hobie, his eyes wide, and you couldn’t decipher his emotion. Miles turned back to Miguel, demanding that he be returned home. He refused, locking him in. They had all began to walk away, apologizing that it had to end like this. Well, not on your watch, but it seems that Hobie beat you to it.

A flash of light, knocking everything and everyone on their ass, you chuckled at the gesture. Miles was still in shock, quickly recovering, running off into the headquarters. Miguel runs after the kid, everyone following behind. You felt a arm wrap around your waist, a portal opening. Before pulling you both through, Hobie declaring his standing with the league.

“And for the record, I quit.”

—

You were back in the comfort of your own home, dressed in your lounge clothes, while your suit in the washer. Hobie had flew you home, as there was no reason to hide it anymore. Now, it was an uncomfortable silence, the two of you haven’t spoke since you left the headquarters. Hobie was getting ready to head out, his back turned to you, but not until you made yourself clear.

“We can’t come back from this.”

You looked up, his eyes staring back at you as he turned to you. The moon illuminated his smile, responding casually.

“Maybe that’s a good thing.”

And then he was gone, and you didn’t know when he would be back.

Or if he ever would be.

Installation (2/5) : ‘Piss Off’ — Released!

‘Just For You’ Masterlist for previous/future installations

-

ᴛᴀɢꜱ!

@darkphantommagazine

@von-studios

@vickyzangels​

@roseluxxx​

@cupcakekiss