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#this year didn’t start out too well
puppetmaster13u · 6 months
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Prompt 136
 There is a small child floating in the Watchtower. 
They’re visibly not human, a too-big cloak of purple (what shade no one knows, all they can describe about the cloak is purple, nothing else) hanging from them as big Lazarus-green eyes glare down in something of a pout. The child huffs, blowing white hair out of their face despite it shimmering and shifting on its own already. 
How the child, inhuman or not, found their way into the Watchtower- without setting off an alarm no less- is a concern. A very large concern, but it can wait because there is a four-year old (if the child is the equivalent of a human child that is) at oldest staring down at them. 
 “Do you know where the speedsters are?” the child piped up after an awkward stare-down, none of the league members present quite sure what to do in this situation. It was probably around time to call Batman… or they could call Flash instead. 
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Nobody:
Me: what if child washed up on the island somehow and was amnesic and tests were done and the burns find out this person is related to them and woodrow is called to the island to do tests too and it’s found out he’s the father and had no clue he had a kid and child gains memories and their mother is awful and Charlie and Woodrow get legal rights to child and now Kade Dani Graham and Cody have a cousin to get to know
#BURNS COUSIN BURNS COUSIN BURNS COUSIN#I imagine this cousin to be a girl roughly around Cody’s age give a year older or younger#just; Woodrow is known as the ‘takes risk’ brother between him and Charlie#you know he had to get into all sorts of dating mischief when he was younger#he gets a girl pregnant by accident but he doesn’t know and she doesn’t tell him#she starts to raise the child and tells her that her father walked out on her#the mom realizes too late she doesn’t love being a mom but keeps child around to use her#I don’t know what incident would happen to get this child amnesiac and on the island but something happens#the child having good times with her ‘friends’ the burns who she’s staying with until she gets her memories back#and exploring the wackiness and tech of the island until Woodrow finally gets to the island like 3 weeks after she had showed up there#AND FINDING OUT THE BURNS ARENT HER FRIENDS BUT HER FAMILY#AND NOW SHE SUDDENLY HAS A DAD?? /HAPPY TEARS#AND WOODROW IS ALL well Charlie’s the family guy I don’t know if I can measure up but I’ll try to take responsibility; wow I have a kid!#AND THE KID IS ALL you don’t have to apologize for not being family oriented I have a dad now and your trying and that’s all that matters#SHE ASKS IF SHE CAN CALL HIM DAD AND HE JUST MELTS#She was going to travel the world with Woodrow but Charlie had a cow about her education and didn’t want her doing only online schooling#so they work it out that she stays with Charlie during the school year and goes traveling with Woodrow during the summer#and Woodrow also visits the island more for holidays for his kid#AUGHSNSAUAHABDVBADHHHH#WOODROW FLUFF#BURNS COUSIN#GIVE IT TO ME#Woodrow burns#Charlie burns#Cody burns#Graham burns#Kade burns#Dani burns#cousin burns#tfrb
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bunnywand · 4 months
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oh huh.. there was a punk band i used to be into, dream nails, who i sort of fell off a few years ago when their original singer (and founder of the band) left and i never rly got into the music they made w/ the new singer as much.. (altho i’d been going off the direction they were heading with their sound a bit b4 that anyways 😅)
but now yday they released a rly fucking weird statement on their instagram abt how the new singer, ishmael, has left too, w/ some vague allusions to how the band was “unable to protect them” from racism, worded in a rly odd and specific way that doesn’t rly make any sincere apology for whatever must have happened 🤨
but on top of that the original singer, janey, posted some stuff too that makes it sound like she didn’t leave the band under good circumstances either so.. who even knows what’s going on 😵‍💫
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peachcitt · 2 years
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Can we see the metamorphosis tweets at some point? Please?
sure!
i never actually got to anything plot-important while making the tweets because i was mostly just trying to figure out a) how to make them and b) the structure of the fic which means all the tweets i made are straight shenanigans
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thanks for asking!!<3
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lazlohno · 2 months
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A ramble about hidden disability lanyards and early expression of my identity
i wear my hidden disability lanyard whenever i go out. it’s VERY decorated, with lots of pins on it, as well as keychains and stim toys clipped on. i am emotionally comfortable wearing it. it gives me something to communicate why i do certain things.
just now i was thinking about something i was asked in school; “Doesn’t it make you nervous that everyone around knows that you’re disabled?”
Hm. I had never thought about it that way. No, not really.
I mean, before I wore my lanyard, I still exhibited autistic traits and behaviours. people just called me weird and crazy for it. now, if they still wanna do that they’ll get (deserved) dirty looks.
Maybe it’s because of how I’ve interacted with my identity. I discovered I was some form of LGBTQ+ fairly young, maybe 9? Age isn’t a reliable marker of time for me. Anyway, I was also very much on the internet, and quickly discovered other people like me - people who were loud and proud about their identities, which gave me the confidence to be like that too. Because of this, I was very confident in that aspect of my identity (despite having issues everywhere else, as is - I think - usual for that age.). I expressed my queerness openly online and among my… nicer peers.
Perhaps my early experience in expressing my identity, as well as receiving backlash and ignorance for it, prepared me to be more confident in my neurodivergence?
I mean, in my mind, the worst they could say is some ableist rhetoric that I know is untrue, right?
Sure, some comments will stick with me for longer, (Looking at you, “Are you gonna get the Barbie set for your Christmas?” guy, who said that after making fun of my stim toys and comfort items I was actively using to regulate myself.)
but meh. I’ve lived through worse. I’ve heard worse, and worse comments come back to me when I’m feeling worse.
So I can handle it, genuinely.
It just made me a bit confused. The question from earlier, I mean.
Yes. Everyone around me knows I am disabled.
But they would’ve known anyway.
I might as well be proud of it!
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rosicheeks · 3 months
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Unfortunately relatable. I grew up in the church and have a lot of Christian trauma from that. I show up for special occasions for my parents… sometimes. But it’s uncomfortable from the moment I step through the door. Bigoted pastor, the self-righteousness disguising the prejudice, the political comments from the altar. Shots at young people left right and center as if the hell on earth wasn’t caused by the same older generation 90% of the congregation belongs to..
I miss being young in the choir and the youth groups and not struggling with it. It’s wild to look back at the younger version of me who was unshakeable in his faith and honestly just saddening.
I was texting my sister today about it and she said
“I 100% think ALL of us have a ton of religious trauma and everyone else in the family just doesn’t realize it cause they’re still drinking the kool-aid.”
I ran out of tag room and didn’t want to delete any 😭 seriously not lying I could write a book about all my thoughts and experiences
#I relate to all of this so much#and it’s so sad how many people truly have religious trauma#I still find myself lucky and privileged cause I know there are stories MUCH worse than mine#it’s really hard cause my parents still think I’m a Christian#honestly at this point I have no clue what i am#even if I end up still being a Christian that doesn’t help or heal all of the years of church trauma#but the hard part is still acting the part for my parents#growing up I always tried to fit into the good Christian girl mold#cause I know that’s what my parents wanted and I didn’t want to disappoint them#but once I started smoking weed and they found out? it went all downhill from there#their perfect angel fell from heaven#and I feel like ever since I haven’t been really their daughter…. I’ve just been living on the outside looking in to everything#it hurts looking back at all the years I spent brainwashed into believing that was the ONLY faith#it genuinely makes me sick to my stomach thinking about the fact that I went to a pro life rally#the thing I was talking to my sister about was how mental health was never talked about in the church#when I started dealing with it and went to my parents or the pastors or any adult really and told them what I was dealing with#wanna know what the first thing they would ALWAYS say? well have you prayed about it? the way they treated mental illness was that it was#YOUR fault cause God is punishing you for something…. that you need to pray or go to church so then God will eventually take it away#and the thing is I don’t necessarily blame my parents (which kinda sucks cause I want to blame someone)#but honestly it’s just the environment they grew up in too… like I’m 99% sure my dad has dealt with depression his entire life#but won’t get diagnosed or anything cause they always believe faith has something to do with it#which makes me incredibly sad cause I just think about how much my dad has suffered and how he didn’t need to#^^ I was typing this out when I was late to my family gathering hahaha but then I think my sister called or something so I had to stop#sorry this post is all over the place - I swear I could write a book about religious trauma#yesterday went ok surprisingly but today? TODAY is going to be so much worse#sure I’ll make a post about it later but I guessssss I should go to bed now? it’s 2am and I have to get up at 5:45 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃#and I have a fuuuuull day of fun Christian festivities while I’m dealing with all of this bottled up and unresolved crap from my past#please don’t get me wrong I love my parents and like I said I don’t blame them - they did their best#it just really sucks wondering what my life would have been like if I didn’t grow up in the church or in a super religious family#I wonder if when I told my parents I was depressed if they would have instantly brought me in to get help
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skhardwarevers1 · 3 months
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anyways “just don’t leave me alone wondering where you are” Program and “I am stronger than you give me credit for” Vista
#Could also be Moon & Tera they’re both equally as sad#But I’m gonna just. Let that sink in.#Even in the early phases (Hansel/Gretel) they were designed specifically to be a stronger more logical machine and a human-esque creation#Vista was never meant to be as strong mentally or physically as Program could#but they pushed through anyway. The perceived imbalance between them will always get me#Vista/Gretel thought Koeia liked Program/Hansel more because he served a purpose#Program/Hansel thought Koeia liked Vista/Gretel more because they were like her “daughter”#And later Program ends up putting aside their differences to look out for them#“For the greater good” my ass! He cared about their well being more because he knew they were supposedly “weaker” than him#but realizing there wasn’t much of a difference between them in Koeia’s eyes made him feel compelled to shield them from some things#He figured that they were meant to be like siblings#he wanted to be their sibling#They wanted to too but they didn’t want to be inferior#They felt that Program was better than them in every way. It was him that made the project possible after all!#Clearly he /must/ be better right?#So they’re stuck in a weird spot of not having known each other for years and only perceiving what they thin other was compared to themself#And then being thrown into a situation where they’re trying to make it out together#Even as early as before the incident Program was looking out for Vista#Program felt threatened by Clay sometimes and would try to tell Vista to get out#Him attacking Clay was his way of trying to help#Which only fucks up Moon a little more when Procyon starts taking that same “helping” role and gets Clay…you know…speared….#And they feel so betrayed it sends them into an entire spiral of barely knowing who they are anymore#Anyways I didn’t meant to rant bye bye#S.K thinks#I hope this changes someone’s perception of Moon as a whole. Just one person I’ll be happy with that
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mattodore · 1 year
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i hit 3k pins on the oc boards last night without even noticing 🥺
#river dipping#what’s funny is i just deleted like forty pins from theo’s board that didn’t represent him anymore and i STILL have 3k 😭#theo’s board is years old and i cleaned it out a few times before but i finally was like okay no.#some of these pins just don’t make sense for him at all you need to delete them even if you’re attached to them atp.#i need to do the same with some of matthias and dionte's early pins too but i've been putting it off#anyway <333333333333333!!!!!!!!!! i'm going to read for an hour or two and then it's back in cas to start on theo's mom#i finished his dad last night i just didn't post abt it#theo's parents are gonna look much younger than matthias's but they're probably close in age. theo's are maaaybe a little younger...#ALSO...... i realized when i was making theo's dad that like. theo and matthias aren't close in age like matthias and imani.#like there's a 2-4 year age gap there... so like. for the edit i'm just gonna make them both fifteen anyway and say Oh Well!#like just pretend there's no age difference#me being like 'i don't wanna give exact ages at the current spot in the story' is fine until i wanna do something like this kdfjgnk#theo's in his early twenties and matthias is in his mid-twenties#theo's like..... somewhere between 22-24 and matthias is somewhere from 25-26... no more than 27 that's for sure#theo's still in university is the thing... like i've always been like theo's 24-ish but realized like hang on... he should be younger#he's very studious and his course load is STACKED so if anything he should be out of university by 22... which is where i've hit a snag#i was thinking oh maybe he could've taken a gap year but like. his parents wouldn't have allowed that at all.#and then i was like okay... maybe he went to rehab for a year so he's behind...?#but again........ his parents wouldn't have allowed him to disgrace the family name publically like that by admitting he has problems#so like... i'm just sort of covering my mouth and mumbling whenever i talk about ages lmao#i just don't want theo to be really young and i don't wanna budge on matthias's age either#idk idk i'll think of something. maybe it can relate to the breakdown he's meant to have...#...anyway. out of the oc soup and into this book <3
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macncheesenibblers · 7 months
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Hi guys I think I had/have serotonin syndrome today and yesterday. Started a new drug for el fibro
#I started lyrica but I’m already on cymbalta#I took the lowest dose only once for two days and I’m hypersensitive so it did it to me#I feel so out of it. I messaged my doctor cuz I only have the mild symptoms and not a TON of them but#got the headache the EXTREME anger/agitation the diarrhea and I feel out of it and had trouble swallowing a little bit#a little cold yesterday but nothing too unusual#I didn’t take today’s dose of cymbalta or my vitamins cuz idk if#they can fuck me up#and I’m skipping lyrica till my doctor says to take it again#I asked her for the liquid version so I can take like 10 mg instead of 50#but the crazy thing is it worked like INSTANTLY within a couple hours of taking it the first day which was Saturday#and it’s supposed to take 2-4 weeks. so. that’s the sign in my family that the dose is too high/something is wrong lmao#but Saturday was pure bliss. I felt calm but energetic. least amount of pain I’d had in years without being stoned out of my gourd#I was happy. nice. polite. things that usually annoyed me and made me snap just didn’t. I could tolerate things so well#I REALLY hope I can take this drug on a micro dose cuz the lack of pain has been phenomenal. I didn’t wear my ankle braces today cuz I’m#still not in pain#my brother had serotonin syndrome from taking a half a dose of an antidepressant once so it seems like a genetic predisposition#like the pain relief is on par with having hydrocodone after my tonsil or wisdom teeth removal it’s INSANE#i just need to um. not have probable serotonin syndrome lmao
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monster42069 · 1 year
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This is something I have never told anyone because it’s tmi but also because what the fuck but the final fucking straw before I split in 2020 was the end of devilman crybaby. so embarrassing to say that on it’s own but what’s worse is that the personality seems so childish with a silly name that doesn’t sound like a real name probably because I had been binge watching looney tunes to try not to off myself. Anytime I feel like that one is cocon I’m like ok you looney tunes son of a bitch go daydream about throwing circular bombs with fuses out of a skyscraper window and leave my bank account balance alone or I swear I will find a way to cartoonishly squish this body while you’re conscious in it
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artificial-condition · 10 months
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Having a gap year was really great for me because it was the first time in my adult life that I was able to just sit with myself. Figure myself out. Work on myself. Even though I had been an adult for several years, I feel like I really matured in my year of nothing. I now feel much more firm in who I am, even with opposition; I have always been a big pushover, letting other people do whatever they wanted and letting my desires go to the side, but now I am much more likely to assert what I want and tell people no. I’ll just do and be without analyzing what others want or expect of me, and it’s so refreshing to let that go. People really do grow in the cracks
#my thoughts#I’ve worked on myself mentally#I feel like a fortress but not one with huge spikes and a dangerous moat to keep people out (like before when I was so afraid of people)#(because they could hurt me)#but instead I am like a fortress in that I am well built and stable and not easily knocked over#I built a little bridge over my moat that’s open on Tuesdays and Thursdays (and alternating Saturdays :D)#but also I’ve just really taken time to build habits like eating things (when I actually need to) that are sustaining#and got glasses for my eyesight to reduce headaches#finally went to the doctor and got migraine medication#went to the doctor TWICE MORE and tried different ones#made sure I got consistent sleep#learned how to balance productivity and fun so that I’m not wearing myself out to the point of dropping from exhaustion or a headache#I learned to listen to my body#I explored my sense of fashion!!!! which I didn’t think I cared too much about before!!!#(this was due to seeing fashion in the lens of my body not fitting into the things I liked therefore not thinking fashion was something for#me. but I pushed my boundaries and started wearing things that seemed fun ANYWAY and stopped caring about if it was *right* and#started thinking of it as a way to HAVE FUN and EXPRESS MYSELF)#(I *knew* that fashion was a form of self expression but I didn’t really get it until this past year.)#anyway. it’s been a good year in hindsight even though throughout it I had flashes of panic thinking I wasn’t going anywhere#but I grew in a different way sitting still than in the years I was *moving forward*#I’m ready to move now and I have new life skills to bring with me :)
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arthur-r · 10 months
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tonight is my last night sleeping in my bed. possibly for the rest of my life. and my last time in my room possibly for the rest of my life. and i want to just get a good night’s sleep to be ready for a long day tomorrow but it’s really not working out like that.
#my family is still up in the air maybe selling this house within the next month#in which case i will never be in this room ever again. otherwise i will be back for the holidays so there’s still a month of this bedroom#if we sell the house in the spring instead (only rational option there’s no way we can empty it in time)#especially since i will not be in this house whatsoever until after that sell date. my mom all by herself can’t empty it all#anyway i’m struggling a bit. saying goodbye to my home of 14 years????#i’ve been through a lot in this place and most of it is bad memories but like. every good memory i have is from here too….#and everyone i know irl is staying local i’m the only one who’s leaving. one irl friend is going to the same school as me but we had a fight#within the past month and i don’t think we’re ever going to recover because she just kind of never treated me like a person#so i’m starting from scratch and it’s really.. like fuck i want to get out of here but i’m also not at all ready to actually leave#i’m just going to miss all the stupid little things so much. even my online memories are tied to this place#like the woods down the street where my deer friends live and the ditch i fell into back in the day and all the places i’ve gotten lost#and they’ll be right here waiting for me and i’m SO excited for college i am but why does it have to feel so sudden????#i dont know how anyone does it.. and all my friends are going to colleges in their hometown so i don’t even have anyone to compare with#i found out today that if we keep the house through the winter my mom is planning on using my room as a guest room and office. and of course#that makes sense and everything but now i have the most crushing guilt for not cleaning it up well enough. i thought it would be okay and#i’d just have to deal with it when i come back and i didn’t know she wanted to use it and she’s going to box up all of my things without me#and i feel guilty that i didn’t do that and i feel scared and upset because it’s my things and my room i don’t want it to change#i’m just really anxious and sad and scared and i don’t know what to do. school is going to be good but none of this feels real or normal#and i just feel sick and scared and i don’t know what to do. waking up at 8am and leaving at 9am and moving in at 2pm and that will be it#my mom and sister are staying for a couple days and that will be good i hope. i dont know i feel so conflicted about everything#and i’m tired and sick and angry and overwhelmed and i just want to take a week off and come back alive again#and i guess that’s what i’m about to do.. after i move in there’s eight days before college starts and all i’ll be doing is moving in#(and welcome week activities. and a lot of sleeping. but hopefully i’m gonna get a rollator through a loan program and that will help a lot)#anyway here’s what’s going on. i’m going to maybe try to sleep i guess. but if anyone has advice or encouragement about moving to college..#now is the time i really need it. it’s just so strange and conflicted and everyone i know has been telling me i just need to get out of here#and myself included i really want to get out of here. but how can i start anew when everyone i’ve loved is shattered. and what have you#think i have to listen to that song for long enough to remember how badly i want to leave….#i’m just really not feeling well. i’m angry that i never got to have the childhood i deserved#because now i’m leaving and that means it’s officially over…. i’m just really not feeling well. i think i’m running out of tags….#i hope you all are well. i’ll be around in the morning maybe.. i’m not sure. hope everyone has a good night
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ziraconarose · 2 years
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Thinking a lot about how she probably would have been the one person to sympathize with his motives if there had just been a conversation.
#Wednesday#wednesday spoilers#Tyler Galpin#Wednesday Adams#the tragic elements got to me. lovel man unaware he’s trying to kill the first person in a century who actually thinks the fact even#outcasts thing his species should just commit suicide at birth is fucked up#I want them to be enemies then frenemies then friends eventually for real#wednesday netflix#the themes of minorities siding with their oppressors for self preservation vs conflict for truth and the messy realities of being pit#against each other. the way community /is/ core to the minority experience but you’re endlessly pit against each other for survival by the#majority and people change and people die to that violence and isolation#this was drawn in reference to the ‘you’re like a cockroach’ ‘this will not end well for you’ exchange#I’ve spent a lot of time now thinking about how Tyler wants revenge on Nevermore specifically for claiming ‘community’#as a core value of all Outcasts. and than discarding his mom without any resources dealing with her powers because she was born a#species ‘too risky’ for their spotless image which drove her to have only one option when she started to change and didn’t#want to hurt her family and about how Wednesday Adams is probably the first person in 30 years to call out a leader of her#outcast community for how they throw other minorities to the wolves to maintain their image in the name#self-preservation. and he’ll probably never know in another life she might have been the one person who understood.
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designernishiki · 11 months
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I feel like whatever was going on with majima/mirei/katsuya in the early 90s was some sort of complicated bisexual love triangle situation. like majima is majima and katsuya’s handsome and eloquent and absolutely doesn’t seem straight to me, but on top of that it feels like there was some sort of confusing tension between katsuya and mirei, not sure if it was romantic or one-sided or what but. SOMETHING. I don’t know what the hell was going on with those three really but no way in hell do I believe the romantic/sexual/??? depth ends with majima and mirei
#katsuya is HANDSOME and CHARMING and ELOQUENT. I just KNOW at least one of them was into him. probably both#one way I’m imagining it could’ve went is like#katsuya introduces majima and mirei to one another and mirei crushes on him pretty quick (because she is 19 and quick to do so)#majima doesn’t really particularly have an interest in her- not cause she’s unattractive or anything probably mostly because she’s almost a#because she’s almost a decade younger than him and barely legal. but at some point she confides in katsuya about her feelings for him and#katsuya being the sweet and honorable kinda dude he is acts as a wingman and tries to get majima to go out with her#and eventually majima relents because he doesn’t want to end up admitting to katsuya that he actually had a thing for KATSUYA#and by playing wingman for his good friend mirei majima takes it as him being uninterested and thus doesn’t shoot his shot and yeah#katsuya’s hard to say no to and hey I mean maybe mirei- a civilian- will make his life more capable of Normalcy#she’s conventionally attractive and is a decent enough friend- albeit he didn’t really know what she was like as a person before she was#crushing on him and also. again. she’s 19 and an idol. so inevitably her identity in general is NOT solid yet#almost as if rebounding off a relationship he never even Got- things move insanely quickly with mirei and they’re married in less than a#year. the whole time katsuya is there cheering them on- he’s smart and I think he’d see the red flags when it comes to their ages and#maturity at least but I think that’d become more apparent over time and he’d start to have regrets but#it’s way too late for that. especially when she comes to him bawling her eyes out because she’s found out she’s pregnant and she has no#idea what to do. both for her career and because she’s literally barely an adult she doesn’t want a child at that point but obviously she#knows she’ll feel guilty and- more than that- deep shame for terminating. she’s insightful even at that age and also maybe can read majima#well enough to know that he might take her abortion as a sign for him to book it to no longer cause her anymore issues. katsuya reassures#her cause what else is he gonna do. but of course she’s right and his commitment issues kick in big time and yeah. over the years katsuya’s#the in-between still close with both of them. specifically he’s closer with mirei and they trust one another a lot more than majima with#either of them- just because majima’s Like That and his trust issues create distance easily. nonetheless at some point majima asks him if#he’s been single for so long because he was hung up on mirei and apologizes if he got in the way of them and that leads into some really#long overdue admissions and likely hooking up. but of course majima is STILL majima and again kinda books it because feelings are#inconvenient and their time for something like a relationship has passed (or something like that).#mirei often wonders if things would’ve been better if she’d have ended up with katsuya instead but similar to majima she’s career-focused#now and just wants to value him as a friend regardless of any lingering potential feelings. majima ends up falling hard for kiryu#sooner than later and life just moves on from any romanticism beteeen the three of them- a nostalgic closeness lingers instead#rambling#that was. a lot.
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roaringroa · 1 year
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so grateful that i managed to restrain myself from properly falling in love with my friend and contained my feelings to a common crush
#she’s just started going out with a guy that i think is really going to last#he’s her friend and i met him quite a few times so i know he’s real sweet and will treat her well and i’m happy about that#i’m actually ecstatic that my feelings for her are shallow because we met up and she talked all about how her date with him went#and i swear she told me he and i are similar like 4 times throughout the conversation#which made me go ouch inside but nothing more#if i liked her more i would have been distraught lmao#and also she told me about when she wasn’t feeling well and he took her to the station and offered to pay the uber that would bring her home#that was really expansive so she wouldn’t take the bus#and she refused and went by bus but told me that was so sweet and that’s when she realized he liked her cause who would do that for her?#and i didn’t say anything but when she started the story i thought she was gonna say that he went in the bus with her to take her home#which is like 1 hour away from our uni cause that’s what i would have done lol#anyway now that she’s got a boyfriend it’s only a matter of time till this crush properly goes away and i can’t wait#i know that the heart chooses what it wants and etc but i think i’m pretty good at nipping my feelings in the bud#like i can’t force them not to exist but when i know that it won’t lead to anything i’m good at stopping myself from fantasizing#or from being overly affectionate and things along those lines#which doesn’t make them go away but hinders their growth#the thing is if i think that i have a chance then i cannot stop myself#and then they grow and grow and grow#and it takes me wayyyy too long to get over it#like it took me 2 years to get over a girl that i did not even date lol#it was really tough for me honestly#and that’s why i’m really careful with my feelings now#i never actually thought i’d have a chance with this friend so that’s why i could keep myself from really falling#anyway i do wish my friend and her bf the best like he’s an actual nice guy and her last bf was definitely not which sucked#and once again i need a tinder account lmao#my post
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inkykeiji · 1 year
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so i’ve read rashōmon + in a grove by the real akutagawa, and i’ve begun reading crime and punishment by the real dostoevsky (absolutely loving it so far!!) but i’m kind of terrified to touch any of the real dazai’s work, especially no longer human, because i don’t want to accidentally trigger myself LMAO (*/ω\*)
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