#today on meta nobody cares about-

[lifetimeoftired]

How to adopt a dead kid in three weeks or less

It's midnight and I'm hopped up on that ADHD juice. Been thinking on and off about this prompt and how things play out. Might clean this up for ao3 posting later but whatever.

Part 1 || Part 2

____

Danny can feel the weight of their stares like it’s physical. A last mournful glance at his pancakes- Actually no, fuck it. He grabs the last one from his plate, flashes the whole Wayne family a peace sign, and turns invisible. The pancake is eaten as he dashes out the door and away from the shouting and chaos he leaves the family in.

 -

“Where the FUCK did he go!?” Jason’s shout somehow made it above the din of the others- and got Bruce and Dick yelling ‘language’ back at him. The pricks.

“I say! Watch your tone Master Jason! As for the rest of you-” The whole family shut the immediate fuck up when Alfred speaks. His displeased expression more than enough to cow them into submission. “I expect you to clean up after yourselves today and a quiet trip to the batcave to find our new ward. Master Jason, you will be taking care of Master Danny’s plates, and I will hear of an apology from you for scaring that poor boy.”

There’s a chorus of ‘yes Alfred’ from the chastised bats, but Bruce- carefully mind you- presses.

“Alfred, how long has he been here? Why didn’t you say anything?”

“The young master has been staying for the past three weeks sir. And despite my best attempts, I have not yet been able to convince him to sleep in his own room.”

Bruce groans and rubs at his face before turning back to his other children, “Nobody thought to tell me!?”

The kids all look at each other, and then back at him with the most judgmental ‘are you serious’ looks they can muster. Except Cassandra, who very excitedly signs; New brother! All Bruce can do is sigh into his hands.

“We’ll discuss this later-”

“Why didn’t you notice then old man?” Jason grins, a little feral at Bruce’s dirty look but sue him.

“Okay okay, let’s hurry up and get this place cleaned up. There’s no telling how far Danny got- and the sooner we go after him the sooner we figure out what’s going on.” Dick said, quickly gathering his own plate. 

“And the sooner I can get all of you presents.” The entire family stops. Staring at Jason in shock. “Only the finest ‘World’s best detective’ mugs for all of you!” 

The groan he gets from all of them is perfect.

-

“I cannot believe you didn’t think to tell me either!” Batman scolds Oracle later. 

Everyone is out in force. Even Batwoman, Batwing, and Bluebird (after having a good laugh at Batman’s expense) had joined. They had all been searching for Danny the better part of the day. Batman had even agreed to let Red Robin and Robin join the search and skip school. That’s how seriously the kids knew he was taking this. And how important it was for one of them to get to Danny before Batman scared him off for good with his infamous paranoia.

“If you didn’t notice, that one’s on you Batman.” God Jason really loved Barbara sometimes. 

“Oracle would not have allowed a dangerous individual into our midst. She is thorough when it comes to such things.” Robin is moving fast, probably swinging right behind Batman. No doubt headed east where the nicer areas were and any sane person was bound to head.

“I think that’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me, baby bat.”

“O, you wouldn’t happen to have a new update on Danny’s whereabouts would you? Or anything from his past?” Nightwing cuts in after Robin’s little ‘Tt’. He’s somewhere near the border to Bludhaven, in case Danny’s making it out that way.

“Nothing Nightwing.” They can hear her frustration, and concern, through the voice modulator. “The kid’s practically a ghost. All I can tell you is that he’s not from Gotham. What little I can find of his time here in Gotham is some security feeds of dumpster diving and sleeping on a bench.”

“He’s also definitely a meta.” Signal mutters, somewhere to the west and near the coast..

Jason remains quiet and lets them all talk. As funny as it is- and holy shit Jason will never let any of them live this down ever- it is a little strange this random kid would just... Show up out of nowhere. Meta or not. Alfred said he wouldn’t sleep in a bed of his own, but he also hadn’t left until after Jason questioned his existence. This ‘Danny’ had been around the manor, the bats coming and going, for weeks. He could’ve found out their secrets, and even if he hadn’t sold them out yet, there’s no telling who might pick him up and drag those secrets out of him. Or worse, if he was sent here by someone, then they needed to find out who. And fast…

….

Ugh. He sounded like Batman.

“Hey guys, how well do you even know Danny?” Jason pulls over near an abandoned apartment building. Cutting the engine to his bike to hear them all better. “He was there for a few weeks, pick up anything on him? Might help us figure out where he ran off to.” That last bit was added as an afterthought, not wanting to be too paranoid, but it was also true.

“I know how this is going to sound, but uh, well, he does seem really nice actually.” Signal helpfully offers. “Dick and I ran into Danny I think not long after he got there?”

“O’s camera feed tells us Danny arrived at the manor 28 days ago, Thursday night 11:38 PM. Looking at the records, he was picked up prior to that in front of Wayne Enterprises by one of our drivers- Archer Tenson. He’s reliable and honest, no record of any sort that would make him a suspect of subterfuge.” Nightwing rattles off the information pretty calmly, but they all know him well enough to hear the concern. “According to the records, he was going to pick up the caffeine addict after the cafe got an alert of his fourth Death Latte-” They all ignored Red Robin’s little ‘hey!’, “-and dropped him off safely at home.”

“Red Robin.” Batman’s parental disapproval was palpable through the comms. 

“There wasn’t a fourth Death Latte!” Red Robin protested from his place in the batcave. Aiding in the digital search and combing over the camera feeds over the past few weeks for any information about Danny. “The third Death Latte was the last one. An Alert at W.E. was the plan the whole night. Nobody made it back to the manor until sunrise and the cafe kept saying there wasn’t any more coffee and-!” He gasped, horrified! Outraged! And the rest were left to hold their snickers as Red Robin said, “He stole my last coffee!”

“That’s right, Danny said he was a caffeine addict too.” Batwing mused. Probably flying somewhere over the more open suburbia in case Danny was trying to make a break out of the city that way.

“Wait when did you meet Danny?” Spoiler asked- Jason knew she was patrolling nearby with Bluebird. Those two, Orphan and Signal were the only ones who were allowed to come close to Crime Alley. Mainly because they annoyed Jason the least, but also because they understood how bad the streets could get and looked the other way better than the others. Signal surprised him about that one.

“Start from the beginning.” Batman orders. “Nightwing, Signal, you met Danny when?”

“Looking back, it was actually the day after he got there it sounds like.” Signal sighs. “I was headed downstairs for breakfast, and saw Dick in one of the sitting rooms. I thought I saw our caffeine addict passed out on the couch and thought dick was going to wake him, so I went in to help…”

[woodchoc-magnum]

idk. i'm annoyed.

i realise i am a fandom old at this point

and i have seen some shit in this fandom; witnessed the discourse.

and i don't post meta or spec or much of that stuff; i usually put all my ideas into fics.

but guys seriously. seriously.

eddie's current arc is not about buck.

buck and eddie are not currently dating.

buck is eddie's best friend and vice versa.

eddie is not cheating on buck.

eddie is lying to buck by omission, yes, but that is not a friendship ending offence.

eddie is on the very cusp of cheating right now. he went on a date with another woman, yes. he has not kissed her or slept with her. we are at a tipping point. we do not know what is going to happen next.

he only went on a date with another woman because she reminded him of shannon, who he is not over, who he has spent seasons trying to replace.

the point of this show is that none of the characters are perfect - and especially not buck and eddie. they all make mistakes. they have all made mistakes and will continue to do so because in real life, people don't always make the right decisions 100% of the time.

this black-and-white, morally righteous way of thinking, like eddie is suddenly evil now because he's on the cusp of cheating; that it's going to end his friendship, that buck is going to be angry at him for lying - do you have friends in real life? like, i am genuinely asking.

because if my best friend suddenly started cheating on her husband, i wouldn't be mad at her - i would be worried. am i alone in this? like i would be genuinely concerned and trying to help figure out what's going on.

all the shit i'm seeing in the fandom today, all of the spec posts and commentary about the episode and what might potentially happen, just feels like, once again, an attempt to paint eddie as the villain in the story to prop up buck. let's make eddie so terrible that buck has to have custody of christopher, right?

clearly none of you understand how a will works. it's for after you're dead. not for when you're alive.

but the main issue is this - now that buck has tommy, the people who tolerated eddie can stop pretending to like him. there's another option for buck now, so you guys don't need eddie anymore. right? am i fucking right??

i love drama as much as the next person, but in what world would buck turn on eddie because of this? in what world would the 118 shun him? he is their friend! they love him! they care about him! they are a family!

my god, nobody shunned hen when she cheated on karen. nobody shuns bobby and he indirectly killed 140 people!

eddie is a good person who makes mistakes, just like every single other character on the show.

that is the fucking point.

and the way ryan was talking in the interviews - isolation could mean any number of things. we know eddie has a tendency to isolate himself when he's feeling stressed out - does anyone remember season 3? season 5? buck literally broke down his door!

i'm just fucking tired of this bullshit.

eddie's not a bad guy because of this. he has done shitty things, yes. they all have. that's the fucking point of the show, and if you can't understand that or appreciate adult story-telling, then fuck off and watch riverdale.

[radiance1]

De-aged Danny, but with the extra addition of him being a Moth-boy.

So he ends up in the DC dimension, one-way, someway and is now an orphan. As one usually would be, when trapped in another dimension and no longer able to contact friends and family while also looking like a goddamn 5-year-old.

So, he lives on the streets as a homeless meta kid, mostly because nobody wants to hire a literal child that looks to be under 10, not even a teen, even if for part time.

So what does a tiny, four-armed and fluffy Moth-boy Ghost to do? Not much, if he's being honest, but when times call for desperate measures he...!

Resorts to stealing.

He's obviously not going to resort to digging through garbage-for interesting little doodads, sure, but not for food. Like earlier today, where he found a little glass marble that he placed with his other glass marbles in a little collection.

Some big, some small, and some even have glitter!

He regularly uses his invisibility and intangibility to steal good for himself, mostly at night, or during a rush hour, and it works well for him. Until he was caught by a pizza shop owner, who for some reason was able to catch him while he was invisible, and instead of being, you know, cursed/and or shouted at for stealing.

He finds himself with a job.

Mostly to do with cleaning the floor, and occasionally taking orders to different tables. He was also granted a free room, and had a pretty decent pay all things considered, also the free pizza was a plus.

Did he expect this to happen? No, no he did not, but did the owner say anything about his glass marble collection? Yes, yes they did. Mostly trying to stop him from digging through the trash for them, and instead pointing him to a store that actually, you know, sells them.

Then one day, while he was mopping the floor (why the fuck are the brooms and mops so big.), their usual delivery guy was out of commission, caught a cold or something, and Danny, wanting to more money as well as help out, volunteered to do this job. He could fly and he was fast, so he was given it, but as long as he was careful and safe.

So he finished most of the orders pretty easily, didn't need to use the scooter since he could, you know, fly and all that. The last place on the list he didn't know that well, but was pretty famous around Jump City.

Titans Tower.

[relaxxattack]

Piggybacking off the last anon, what is it you like about Jane so much? I find my feelings on her kind of mixed but I lean towards positive.

okay i haven’t read act six in probably like 5 years so bear with me here. *cracks knuckles*

jane is sooo so interesting and it’s really a shame people miss like everything fun about her.

pre-scratch she used her detective work to literally succeed at tearing down the crocker cooperation, to the point that HIC has to fucking abandon ship and head into another universe to have another shot at her evil empire. pre-scratch jane is also fucking hilarious! if you didnt enjoy her antics with john as nannasprite you must just have no heart

meanwhile HIC breaches a new universe, and her FIRST fucking order of business is to NEUTRALIZE JANE CROCKER because of how goddamn detrimental she was to HIC’s plans the first time around.

not ONLY does HIC pump subliminal messaging and brainwashing into nearly every aspect of jane’s life, she also tries to straight up mind control her basically whenever possible! she ALSO sends assassination attempts after jane 24/7! (people will seriously try to say that jane lived a safe normal life… as if she wasn’t almost killed by walking into her backyard.) this is because HIC is fucking scared of jane, as she very well should be!

jane is also NOT a boring weepy annoying crybaby like everyone and their mother complains about. jane is literally the most fucking supportive friend and emotion-repressing dumbass you could ever hope to meet. jane combines john’s emotional repression and jade’s intentional cheerfulness together into one of the most fucked up cases of emotional repression in the whole comic

act 6 suffers from a LOT of shitty writing choices, but it’s not jane’s fault the whole act turns into a soap opera— and she’s ALSO not the only one who acts all soap-opera-y either! literally all of the alpha kids suffer from this, people just like jane the least so they project it all onto her. despite the fact that she did her very fucking best to NEVER talk about her feelings, to the point where she ONLY started telling people about shit when she was mind-controlled or took mind altering substances to make her do so! and you can say “ohhh that’s stupid she shouldn’t repress things in the first place how dumb” but, one she’s sixteen, and two, everyone eats that shit up when it comes from like. literally any other character.

people (cough hs2 writers) act like she would actually be “pushy” with a relationship on jake— as if she wasn’t literally the one who helped him make the decision to explore dating dirk?? because she thought it was the right thing to do???

jane is incredibly thoughtful and mature and people really throw all of those traits out of the window with preference for a version of the story where she Comes Inbetween Their Fave Gay Pairing as if she wasn’t, again, the one who got them together. jane is also extremely interesting in terms of queerness; she’s got the makings of a really interesting arc, not to mention she’s the only human girl that dresses mainly masc! there’s a lot there that people just don’t care to explore.

people just have less patience for the prospit kids in general. not to mention homestuck fans love to be misogynistic and berate jane for stuff they love the men doing, or claim she’s coming between them when she’s not, etc etc. and then because no one was writing fun meta posts about her, nobody ever rereads the comic to grab little scenes or lines to expand the online discussion about her! and then because there’s no discussion about her, people assume she’s boring and don’t go looking for bits to start discussing, which cycles on and on forever until we have the ripple effects we see of that misogyny today. which mostly consists of, “oh i hate jane because she was a villain is hs2”, or, “i know hs2 isn’t canon but i still don’t care for jane because she doesn’t do anything that interests me.” (and she’s only not interesting because of the cycle i mentioned before causing NO ONE to have meta discussion about her).

idk, it’s been a while since ive read so i could be talking out my ass but that’s what i’ve got.

TL;DR: jane is fucking COOL, she just suffers from intentional fandom ignorance. and she’s also a canonically hot, fat, masc woman, so i don’t know what else you could possibly want.

[olderthannetfic]

fandom social justice history anon here - aaah, thank you, early fandom being dominated by academics definitely connected the dots I was missing, thank you! Yeah, now looking at it with this in mind, it's pretty obvious how the tone of the meta essays from that era, while often snarky or even outraged, definitely sounds more like the tone of people who are used to passionately arguing in a setting that doesn't allow you to just throw whatever ad hominem accusation at your opponent's head. In contrast, tumblr's (and as a result, twitter's and tiktok's) style of fandom drama now reads to me even more blatantly like a catfight between high schoolers who have just recently learned some Big Words they only care to use as ammunition. I've read multiple older fans (including your invaluably informative blog) talking about how tumblr definitely reshaped fandom and brought in a TON of new people, and how slash was far from the "mainstream" of fandom even in the livejournal-ffn.net days, and I'm having a feeling that, for all the imperfections of this first tumblr generation of fans' activism ("let my gays marry" etc etc) the thing that got slash to be "mainstreamed" within fandom the way it currently is, also has to do with this pretty sizeable influx of new fans being mostly teenagers. As in specifically, overwhelmingly teenage girls who were having their first sparks of interest in romance during the height of the "I'm not like other girls" era + everyone shitting on twilight & "girly" musicians, because if you look at the posts from that period, they often contrast being a slash reader with being the slutty partying "other girl" or annoying hipster & at my school too slash kind of spread as a "not like the other girls" alternative to mainstream romance. Yes, not the healthiest attitude either, and it's good we've mostly grown past that, but like I said, there's a good chance that was what buffed up the numbers of slash fans to the point where today people are surprised fandom ever even was hostile to it, and at least in my environment, fandom activism, for all its flaws, was most people's first exposure to any sort of "-rights" activism at all. But (as is probably obvious) I did not experience most of even that era personally (I joined tumblr fandom in 2014). Anyways, excuse the rambling, if you feel like adding anything to confirm or deny my hypothesis, I greatly appreciate it, and I hope you have a nice day/evening!

--

M/M still isn't mainstream in plenty of fandom contexts, just not the ones I hang out in, and "not like the other girls" of the type you describe was already big in the 90s among people who'd heard of fanfic. It's just that fanfic was harder to stumble across overall.

I think the two biggest factors are the changing attitudes towards gayness in mainstream culture in a number of countries and... well... AO3 getting popular.

FFN was the big place in the past, though not for my crowd. Now, AO3 is taking a massive bite out of not only its market share but now, in the last few years, Wattpad's.

When the visible institution around which fanfic revolves puts filtering out het front and center, it sends a strong message that previous fandom platforms did not. You had your m/m-only archives and your f/f-only archives and your places that let you filter for those but that treated het as an unmarked default.

Look at early discussions of AO3. There's an undercurrent there that we all assumed it would be one of a number of archives and that we didn't expect it to get this big.

Nobody could have foreseen the Het-Is-Eternal-Default Wattpad crowd being forced by their own platform's suckitude to come camp on the thing built by slashers. Now, we are the admins and they are the also-tolerated. That never happened before.

The thing that makes people not report gay hand holding as evil porn that must be eradicated is simply AO3 putting its foot down.

Anyone who thinks that virulent slash hate is gone just hasn't looked at other spaces.

This is not about individual fans behaving better: it is about institutional power.

[v0id-echoes]

y’know what I’m feeling pretty brave today so I’m about to say something controversial that may get me crucified lmao, bit of a rant post but I just wanna get this off my chest

attacking and insulting people over what pokemon they prefer to use in competitive is really stupid and childish actually. I don’t care if someone prefers to use their favourites or off-meta pokemon, or if someone exclusively uses the meta picks, there is no sensible reason to be genuinely toxic over how someone else plays the game, it seriously doesn’t matter that much

see this shit all the time on twitter (of course it’s twitter) and I just don’t get why some people are like that, obviously this isn’t something that every competitive player does or anything but some people definitely do and it’s so dumb

some people take the game more seriously than others and wanna win, which is valid. some people treat it more casually and just wanna fuck around and have fun, which is valid. nobody should be getting shit for how they wanna play a silly little game, just let people play however they want it’s not that deep 💀

and besides it’s definitely possible to make off-meta pokemon work, you just have to know what you’re doing.

[prismatoxic]

i've told parts of this story before, but bare with me, i'm emotional.

so like, i've had this blog since 2021. my original tumblr blog (made in 2011 iirc) was nuked in 2018 for exactly the reason you think (nsfw ban) and i didn't return for a handful of years because it stung so bad. even when i did, i mostly used twitter.

i started posting to tumblr more regularly when musk's twitter takeover finally pissed me off enough to ditch it. (i have since gone back, sort of, but am not reliably present and mostly just rt art people send me.) i've been pretty consistently here since then, sans a very angry break when all the shit with automattic's CEO happened.

and like... looking through my archives... i only made a dedicated tag for asks last july, even though i've been using an organizational tag system since i made this blog. that's how infrequent they were. my art usually got between 0 and 3 notes. when i left briefly back in january, i deleted every post in my art tag because i didn't want to leave my work here, but also, like... the only things that went anywhere were some of my mgs fanarts. no one owes anyone's work attention, but it didn't feel worth it, you know? like why share it with the public when i can just show it to the like 3 friends i know who care?

i came back partially because i felt... isolated. i have friends on the fediverse and on discord, but tumblr gave me a sense of being in a community, even if i didn't feel like an important part of said community. i missed queuing funny posts to enjoy weeks later, i missed being kept sort of in-the-loop about fandom goings-on, i missed my friends who were still here. (and that last one is also part of why i check twitter more now.)

but that alone wasn't enough, because i was a nobody here and it probably wasn't worth it to try again. but then devot and i started watching dungeon meshi, and i got into chilaios just like i thought i would, and tumblr has the largest concentration of chilaios fanart and posts. not only that, but every post i saw in the tag had so much engagement! i didn't see a single one that went unnoticed, back in february. so i hesitantly came back. i started reblogging chilaios posts. i didn't intend to try and break into the space because i knew it'd just hurt if i went unnoticed again, like i did in other fandoms.

but i made friends, little by little. i started a fanfic. i cautiously began posting my art again. i started writing meta, and shitposts, and replying on other people's posts, and commenting on other people's fics, and now...

that ask tag i mentioned? there are 15 pages of posts with that tag on my blog. only 2 and a half of those pages are asks from before i got into dunmeshi. people talk to me--they care about my thoughts and my opinions, they compliment the things i make. i have a group of like, 30+ people i interact with regularly, many of which i now consider close friends. everything i post gets some attention, no matter what it is.

this isn't a humblebrag, it's just... a thank you. i can't really properly express the depths of the loneliness i've felt in the past. i was an outcast for a long time, and it was way worse pre-2019, but i don't think it's ever fully left me. i've been hurt very, very badly in the past, and i've been abandoned a lot, and i've been ostracized a lot. i've grown into who i am today both in spite of and because of all i've been through, and for that i wouldn't ever change it, but it was still hard.

so today, as i turn 29, seeing asks and gifts pour in to tell me happy birthday, and that i'm appreciated... just, thank you.

if there's one thing you can give me today, it's this: reblog someone's art or writing or meta with some enthusiastic tags. send someone a friendly ask. reply to someone's post to comment on something they've said. write comments on ao3 for the fics that move you, no matter how much or how little you can think of to say.

this is going to sound cheesy as hell, but i genuinely mean it: reach out, and spread joy, whenever and wherever you can. you never know who's in pain, who's lonely or who feels worthless. and if it's you who feels that way, do what you can anyway; a community that isn't afraid to reach out will reach back to you, too. and you're not alone. i care, i promise--and more people than you realize do too.

it's so easy to underestimate how much a kind word can do. they add up, though. so keep going.

[noras-dc-shenanigans]

Children | Music

The Bats weren’t really music people. Bruce didn’t really care about it, Dick preferred to be the one making the noice, Jason favored quiet for his reading, Tim was just too busy to listen, and Damien… well. League of Assassins: not really the forefront on the ‘hobby’ department.

So when a social worker had shown up with a feral, black haired, sometimes-blue-sometimes-Lazarus-green eyed kid, who was apparently Bruce’s cousin’s son, nobody expected that to change. He was quiet, refused to look anybody in the face, and hid in his room and only came out to eat.

Of course, considering the horrible way all his family and friends had died, and the downright abusive godfather he was removed from two months later after a very public breakdown, nobody blamed him. They had all quickly resolved to leave him alone until he was ready. (Well, mostly all. The others kept their own feral green-eyed kid in line until he got the message.)

That went on for about a week, with the kid, Danny, slowly coming out more and more, a lot like a stray cat. By the second week, he would eat meals with them rather than take his plate back upstairs, to appear magically in the sink sometime afterwords, right before Alfred would load them into the dishwasher.

A few days after the meals, he started answering innocuous questions like ‘what did you do today’ and ‘what’s your opinion on this show?’. Slowly, slowly, Danny learned that they were trustworthy, and started appearing during movies and game nights and on one memorable occasion a month in, joined in on the prank war Steph started, and subsequently won.

(They suspected, based on some of those pranks, that Danny was a meta. Some sort of invisibility and density shifting, from what Barbara found on the cameras afterwords. There was no record of him having been tested for it before, and, well… it wouldn’t be the first time a traumatic event activated someone’s meta-gene.)

So, even with all of that, he was still a pretty quiet kid. Which is why, five weeks after Danny came to live with them, they were all so surprised to hear loud, gothic music blaring out of his room. Like, really loud.

For most of the day. Also for that whole time, never once did Danny leave his room. Not for food, or movie night, or even when Jason intentionally dropped a millipede down Steph’s shirt right outside his door. There was just loud goth music, from 8:00 am until they left for patrol around 9:00 pm.

When they returned a little after 3:00, Alfred informed them that the music had suddenly cut off right at midnight, and Danny had then appeared in the kitchen, eyes red and face swollen in the way that meant a long time crying. He’d grabbed an apple, some granola bars, and at Alfred’s insistence two sandwiches and a large Gatorade before disappearing back into his room.

The next morning, at breakfast, they’d all pretended it didn’t happen. Apparently, the universe decided that the choice of a bunch of detective vigilantes to not invade someone’s privacy was deserving of a reward, because halfway through their meal Danny had set his fork down, taken a deep, slow breath, and said into the hushed room,

“Yesterday was my friend Sam’s birthday. She would’ve been 15. She was super goth, and hated that her parents would dress her up in bright frilly dresses whenever they dragged her along to some gala or rich-person event. Whenever they’d make a comment about me, or my pa-parents, she’d invite me and T- Tucker over and we’d help her pick out the loudest, gothiest music and jud-judge what outfits to buy online by how much her parents would hate them. She- she and Tucker were my only friends since we moved to Amity in first grade. Everyone else thought that because my parents were weird I was too but Tucker was nerdy and Sam was just Sam so we migrated together and stayed and now they’re gone because of me and I—“

He’d gasped, desperately, tears streaming down his face and everybody had moved as the well-trained unit they were, despite all their differences.

20 minutes later, the movie room had been requisitioned for a giant nest of pillows and blankets, and everyone piled in. There was hot cocoa and fresh-baked warm cookies and hugs and confessions. Bruce snuck away just long enough to task Cyborg with looking into the GIW and Amity Park’s ghost problem. Jason discovered that the Pit goes from pissed wolverine to cuddly kitten if he held Danny close. So of course he cuddles right in, just for the Pit, no other reason, ignore the hair petting and the weird purring sound he made.

Eventually, they’ll all have to get up. Some to work, others to work, and others still for various other activities and responsibilities.

But that’s later.

For now, they comfort a grieving kid, and, maybe, plot the downfall of a certain Fruitloop.

[benpaddon]

I wrote this six years ago. It's still true today. Here it is again.

“Man, I wish someone would write a story about…”

No, stop. Stop. Stop typing that post, and start typing that story instead. Just type that. Then share that. Share the story instead.

“But I’m not a writer!” you might say. Well, maybe that’s true now, because you’re not presently writing. So start writing, then. Look! Now you’re a writer! It’s really that simple.

“But I can’t write!” You were about to type up a Facebook post, presumably using some kind of computer or phone. Don’t want to use those? Grab a pen and some paper. As well as this, you’ve already proven that you have an imagination - you have an idea for a story. You have everything you need to start writing. You can do it.

“But it won’t be any good if I write it!” Y’know, maybe that’s true. But writing, like any skill, is something that gets better with practice.Maybe it’ll take you a while to get that story out of your head. Maybe it’ll take days. Or weeks. Or months. Or years. But you can get it out of your head and onto the page.

“But what if I finish writing the story and it’s terrible?” Want to know a secret? Everybody’s first drafts are awful. They are. It’s incredibly rare for a someone to bash out a story on their first spin of the wheel and think, “Yeah, this is good, I’m done.” A first draft is like a sketch, and the sketch isn’t the painting.

“But what if people don’t like it?” Then that’s their problem. Shakespeare had haters, too. Didn’t stop him from bashing out a million-billion plays.

“But what if nobody cares?” I promise you, somebody will care. Every story, every piece of fiction ever penned, has at least one person out there who thinks of it as their all-time favorite thing. We live in a world where someone’s favorite movie is Transformers: Dark of the Moon. Someone, somewhere, will love the story you’re about to write. Somebody will hold it close to their chest. They’ll read it and re-read it, they’ll write metas about it, they’ll write fanfiction. And they’ll say to their friends, “Hey, have you read this? You should check it out - it’s my favorite.”

“But I don’t want to write it… I just want to be able to read it.” And, y’know, that’s okay. Sometimes those “I wish someone would write a story about…” posts inspire others. But often they don’t, and that means that story idea swimming around in your head stays just that - an idea. Sometimes the only person who can put something into the world is you. Why wait?

Wishing is nothing. Hoping is something. Action is everything. Act. Write. Create. And let me know when it’s done - I’d love to read it.

[understandableparadox]

Bottom of the barrel isekai: b-rank adventurer with an evil look becomes a daddy to the protagonist and his childhood friend.

Well if i'm reading it, that's a goddamn lie, hello! Pull up a chair, drink my tea, piss on my wife, you have the most control in this world because you are the specialist lil fella that can do not a lick of wrong! It's time for another bottom of the barrel isekai review! Today, you can read the title above, go fuck yourself if you think im going write it out every single god damn time.

Come out boys, girls and some other thing, frogs? Is that what the enbys like these days? Frogs? Anyways let's do the song and dance!

Our titular main character is a dude from japan, they wasted their live away being a disgusting fucking neet and playing video games all the live long day, being a whale in pirates 101 and domeing me from across the map as widow maker on royal!  

Anyways he fucking Dies and gets reincarnated in the game he and his singular friend dearly loved known as bright fantasy, now as we can see in the picture above, perhaps he reincarnated as some sorta giga god, perhaps his party abandoned him because they didnt understand the monumental boon a tax accountant has in another world… perhaps he was summoned by the king to Fuck his wife for him! 

Wait a second… is that a sharp detour…? FU-

Anyways gray is reborn as a Thug Npc, or someone with a dark background, his looks mean, he has a average appearance and some fucking sick shoulder gaurds.  He is a moody lil nobody, which is why it's such an insane hook to see it open with two children begging to be adopted by him in the opening

Now before you get too scared that we are running into uncharted territories since we haven't had anyone betray anyone and the MC has not turned god inside out, we get to dive back into the cool cocoons of familiar fantasy tropes with the adventuring ranking system. I'm not going to bother to explain it, if you got a letter grade in school then you know what it means. Get close to the A and that means you are the Big Boy adventurer who does the Big Boy quests. 

Now i do appreciate the authors restraint and only making him the Second Biggest boy and attempting to make him Not A Twink

We almost have a guy who is on a bulk and not a cut, sigh, one day. 

Anyways we pull back ground tall dark and who cares to learn that these two are matchstick kids. Dead broke kids who are attempting to sell flowers they have picked to the people on the street. They were attacked by nobody you are going to remember and get healed by gray. They then decide to beg him to save their ailing parents because I guess wonka isn't around to give golden tickets to get them out of bed or whatever. 

They tell them their names, one of them has the super special name of the Super Main Character. What a coinkyDink. Gray knows that if he is to be a villain (???) then his job is to avoid it. Luckily he went to the Katarina claes school of villainy and decided that ethical action is actually more important than meta narrative logic. 

Cut to Tiny tims lakeside property and we see the rest of the family living the fucking dream!

I'm so sorry, i have this mental tick where i accidently say “dream” instead of “nightmare”.

Also Stella is a vampire, why? Fuck you thats why. 

They explain that they have been getting by by the skin of their teeth through a combination of the street urchin grind set of selling flowers and getting church donations. Gray beats up some assumed child abductors outside and gives a somewhat creepy smile. 

Next chapter is about Gray stealing an orcs' balls to create a high end potion (viagra) to nobles so he can get enough money to buy something called a “home”? I'm not sure what that is exactly, i'm not sure what the translator was talking about, i've certainly never heard of someone “buying” or owning one for certain.

I don't actually have much to say about this guy, this is the guy who makes the ball potion for gray, I just like him, he has a funny face, I like looking at it. He looks like someone I would trade yugioh cards with while he tells me about his super cool oc and I would listen because he is a fun dude. 

But yeah, the manga is mostly about this guy being a slightly more psychotic late stage kratos, being a dad, trying to raise a bunch of random kids he found, trying to give the main character a taste of normalcy before the plot kicks and and shit goes sideways, oh and sometimes he brutally kills people. 

His main goal is to have a family and that's about that. 

So let's start getting into things. 

The title has no interest in creating an expansive world that is original, everything of it is meat burrowed and stitched into its own narrative to support its own plot line and to explain why this happens and why that is occurring at this point. Now I do not believe that this is inherently a bad thing. In fact it's fine. Not every single manga needs to be the next genre defining piece of media. In fact we need things that are average, we need things that build the genre or else we can never have exceptions to the rule.  The magic system, the team system, the classes, the guilds, the plot, it's all what you would expect from something with final fantasy inspirations. Semi (not really) complicated fighting systems that only make sense to pad out the loving tedium of a game. “Complete this many quests of this level to rank up.” “collect this many monster parts to complete the quest” and so on and so fourth ad infitum until god has to pop out and ask what the fuck is going on. 

The art is great in places. Most of it is very bog standard, you aren't going to get that much out of it if you are expecting groundbreaking designs that really make you scratch your chin in wonder at how they made something like that up. But it's very clearly competent and knows how to give each of its characters that needed cover before you read the book. People that need to look like unlikeable thugs look like unlikeable thugs, children that need to look sweet and innocent look sweet and innocent. The artist is really good at goofy expressions but they are a bit few and far between to really satisfy my desire for evil fucked up faces, oh kekegurui… if i didnt hate your plot so much i would be so much more obsessed with you… 

The tropes I've already gone over. It uses every single trope but more so in the way someone would do if they were playing a new game plus. You don't want to do the rigamarole of the heroes rise so you make them overpowered and whatever so they can get to the stuff that you have deemed important, that being fatherhood simulator and housing market simulator. The world is secondary to the plot the author wants so they grab the tropes they want to ensure they can focus on that part of the story with impunity while hand waving some other things and give ol daddy gray his badass moments to make the editors happy that this is infact enough of a power fantasy. You know, to keep those freaks that actually buy the manga happy. 

As for kink stuff, none that I can see. The author only seems to want women to fawn on the main character so they can complete the golden vision of the dead emperor abe of the nuclear family, perhaps hoping to tempt his blessing from beyond the grave… 

This was a little bit of a boreing read. I cant entirely recommend it, but if you want to see some edgy boredline twunk be a dad to a bunch of random kids he adopted then yeah, go for it lmao. 

[sharp-teeth-and-archived]

turn week day 2: content creator appreciation day!

Fair warning, this is mostly going to be rp blog related because that's the corner of the fandom I'm in mostly. I write on here and cabbxges-and-kings.

1. @annastrxng I always really treasure our threads from Hewlett to Abe to Rogers. I really love our Anna & Abe thread, even if it was crack related because of the cabbage cake. I feel like we have bridged the gap between Abe and Anna and how the writers gave them little to no chemistry. We have added more life to their ship than the writers ever cared to do. I always enjoy the chaotic nature of Rogers and Anna interacting and his dynamic with Philomena, both people wronged by Andre and their circumstances to where they come together by a mutual need of revenge. I also enjoy our Annlett threads and the idea of Ellie in the mix of s4, strengthening Hewlett's character arc in that season. I feel like nobody has the best grasp of Anna but you. I also really treasure our one thread of Hewlett and Elizabeth bonding over pirates, haha.

2. @honorhearted We've been writing for so long, I can't possibly talk about all our threads together. I fondly look back on our Hewlett & Ben Horse Girl Book ClubTM thread and can't help but imagine what could've happened in the show if they met personally. That thread really helped me develop Hewlett as a whole with how his past impacts the present. We also finished what the writers didn't care to finish between Rogers and Ben. Also the Abe and Ben bonding moments. You listen to my random ideas and you're always willing to interact with whoever, so I really appericate that. Thank you for joking around with me in dms and supporting my madness and to continue writing with me for 2 years.

3. @pagetreader A new mutual of mine. I always enjoy the thought and the depth in all your ocs and I can't help but notice how well you write Peggy. I really need to get to our drafts, but I'm really looking forward to exploring more with your ocs and seeing where our dynamics take us!

4. @calamity-bean This is a random mention because you aren't a roleplay blog, haha. But I've looked through your meta analysis of turn and I love every single one! I also loved your fic! I know you don't post turn content anymore, but I just wanted to mention you because I loved the way you explored the characters when turn was running. I also really enjoy your artwork in general.

5. @multipleoccupancy We haven't written in a while due to our busy schedules, but I still look over our stuff in my drafts. I'm always fond of Hewlett and to find another who appreciates him as I do and writes him with my muses is always a joy. I feel like you have a really good grasp of his voice and his mannerisms that I can't help but read your threads for him on my dash.

6. @anoseforrottenapples Best Mary hands down. I feel like Rose captures Mary perfectly to where she could've wrote her herself. I'm always amazed with her depth into Mary's background that all her headcanons are basically canon in my mind when I think of Mary. Rose is also very sweet and is always super supportive of my ocs, I couldn't appericate her more for it.

7. @retrograderesemblance I can't even begin to talk about all our dynamics throughout the year we've been writing, haha. I love how chaotic to complex our dynamics have gotten over time. I still re-read our threads from time to time. I think Lydia wouldn't be the oc she is today if she didn't interact with your muses. I always enjoy our ooc madness and how we can go from that to complex plot meta chatter. I really treasure all our threads, new and old, and I love how our writing flows so well together (and how our muses are almost seamless in the way they naturally interact with one another, like Sarah and Sean for instance).

[casualavocados]

alright, here comes the long ass super personal and sentimental post absolutely nobody asked for (you’re welcome)

i watched episode 1 of bad buddy the day it aired (1 year ago today!) out of sheer luck. i dont even remember how i discovered it, but my initial thought was: “im bored. it’s 11pm and i dont want to go to sleep. this trailer looked fun. oh it came out today? sure what the fuck.” and i watched it in bed, on my phone. completely fucking unaware of what was about to happen to me and my life - and this honestly amuses me so much when i think about it because let me tell you...

i am NOT one to watch romance for romance’s sake. i really couldnt care less for it tbh. i’m not what i’d call a shipper at all (though i used to be, and if you remember my blog back then i owe you financial compensation bc tbh that whole spectacle exhausted me ANYWAY-). 

romance is just something ive always preferred as a side dish to plot, bc i only tend to like it when it’s super well done, and ive never found any of it very realistic. this was actually pretty unfortunate for past me bc fun fact, i am a little bit of a hopeless romantic, and romcoms are my guilty pleasure. the problem is i also dont like any of them enough to care about them after ive satisfied my initial “i want to watch something cheesy and cute” urge. i’d seen a few other bl’s over the years but only bc i was bored or wanted to watch something gay, and none of them had ever stuck in my mind after i finished them. i actively avoided those fandom spaces so i definitely wasn’t keeping up with what was new. 

(now listen, i have very specific thoughts on bl itself, but im not gonna get into that here (and actually miscellar said yesterday that the bl difference between 2020 and 2022 is unrecognizable and that basically sums it up so i dont have to lmao <3)).

- and ep1 of bad buddy is pretty typical bl! i adore this about it tbh because i was completely unprepared for everything the show was about to pull. my initial reaction was that it was something fun to look forward to every week.

so then-

I dont!! i dont even know how to explain it! ive tried too many times!

but it really is That Bitch, and truly feels like something i’d been waiting my whole life to see. a romantic comedy that was incredibly realistic in the sense of being overwhelmingly human, and also overwhelmingly queer. it’s so effortlessly fucking funny, while simultaneously a very (very very very) layered and emotional story. i will sing its praises to the end of time. it is quite literally the most well crafted show i’ve ever seen, and every time i rewatch it, or go back and reread old meta, im reminded that im not insane believing that. it just literally is that good. it’s such a simple story done so. extremely. well. it’s so ordinary, and that makes it extraordinary, and that was the intention from the start.

but i also have to say, one of the best things about having this show, is getting to be apart of the amazing community i found here loving it alongside me. bc i avoid fandoms. i stick to the places and the people/mutuals i know. i drift through edit tags more than i follow individual blogs. i block people like lightning. i have always had anons and replies off and i enjoy my privacy!!!

and i have talked to more people and made more friends and have had more fun this past year than i ever have before on this site. 

it took me until after bb finished airing to start following people back, but by then i knew which blogs posted what and what i’d want to see more of on my dash - and there are still many many people im not following, or who arent following me, that i talk to! i love each of you so very much, and i want to do a couple special shoutouts, if thats okay. ♥️

SO, in no particular orderrrrrr:

@mrdumpling nuria you were the very first bl-centric blog to follow me, and as such gave me a little bit of a heart attack that day, because i knew you were a popular blog and i Was Not Ready For Attention lol. but im so glad you did! ik we don’t talk often, but i love lurking on your blog and following what you’re interested in, and most especially, sharing this show with you. to say your edits are beautiful is an understatement! i always love to see what you make!! 🧡

@actually-yikes SORA I MISS YOUUUUUU!!! 🌹 i love talking to you, i love bonding over warrior pran with you, i love the edits you make. i think you’re very funny and delightful. seriously. ...im kind of at a loss for words here bc you’re one of the blogs i went to the most while bb was airing, and the first person i followed after it ended. i really just think you’re wonderful, and idk how else to say it! ily!!!💕💕

@miscellar you have some of the best takes ive ever read, and you somehow seem to read my mind and write (in much better words than i ever could!) exactly what im feeling on so many different topics. i love reading your analysis, your criticism, and just in general whatever you have to say. you impress me very much tbh and im always a bit amazed whenever you talk to me. i love sharing meta with you! 💚

@pranparakul KATIIIEEE when you’re not on my dash i miss you. even if you’ve got posts in your queue ill be like 🥺 where’s katie? is she having a good day today? literally it doesnt matter what you post abt, bc your enthusiasm for whatever it is always makes me so happy. keep doing you <3♥️🌸💗💕💜🌸❣💗💜♥️💕

@snimeat GEI. okay we dont talk OFTEN but when we do we talk a LOT. your excitement is sooooooooooooo contagious and it always matches mine and i feel SO SEEN. i think your edits have such a mystical vibe to them...they always make me feel very wistful (in a very good way). luv u 💛

@pranpats Kit!!! your gifs are GORGEOUS. and you are one of the sweetest people on this site. you always say such lovely things in the tags, and i love occasionally coming to talk to you about gifmaking things. you are such a warm presence on my dash! 💜

and of COURSE @grapejuicegay - kk i think we speedran our friendship in the last 6 weeks. idk how we never really talked before, now that i know we were BOTH lurking on each other’s blogs this whole year. i don’t even know what to say that i haven’t already said in our dms. i fucking love talking to you. there are some people you just click with and im so glad you’re one of them. 💙💌💗💖💜💙💕💛♥️🌹💌💖💙💕

there are so many more of you i want to mention here!! and if you read this far please know im probably also thinking of you, and i want you all to know that i have loved every minute watching and sharing this show with you.

im constantly blown away by everyone’s kindness and how welcoming all of you are. this is truly my favorite place to be online. thank you for all the tags on my gifs and meta. thank you for being so warm.

im so happy this little show means as much to all of you as it does to me. happy one year everybody. 🎆🥂💚❤

[gisellelx]

Twilight Advent, Day 4

Masterpost/prompts

Dec. 4 - Pick a Twilight couple (canon or AU) and tell us/draw their favorite way to snuggle.

Well, that intriguing parenthetical opened up a rat's nest of intertwining (and kinda nsfw? and also slashy--you've been warned) headcanons, here, so, sorry, please buckle up. I've been meaning to write about the role headcanons can play in fic writing for awhile, and at some point an even longer writing meta is due, but today I'll get straight to the point even though this will in no way be brief--I enjoy writing fic precisely because it lets me think about characterization in a deep and complicated way. I'm always writing fic to get at the characters first and the situation second. It's even embedded in the title of my tumblr.

When I write an AU, I don't consider myself to be writing a different version of the characters. I consider myself to be writing the same characters, with all the same personalities, motivations, concerns, and fatal flaws, just having gone through or going through different circumstances. Kairos Carlisle is "Sensitivity" Carlisle is Patroclus Carlisle is Ithaca Carlisle; same guy, different situations. It’s why all my AUs have a clear point at which they’ve diverged from canon—I’m experimenting with the character by changing their world and letting their world change them.

So the underlying headcanon. Carlisle is badly, badly touch-starved. His nurse cuddled him and snuggled him—and he was with her for a long time—but he eventually left nurse and went back to London and to his father, who was much more concerned that Carlisle be saved than that he feel loved. They had little to no physical contact. Just at the very moment when he might have married, become sexually active, and had children of his own to cuddle, he gets stripped of his human life and for his own safety, has to separate from humankind altogether for many years. Then, he finally finds friendship and companionship, but in a man whose touch violates every snippet of his privacy. And still he stays, far longer than he ought, before setting out again for another century and a half, until he brings home a seventeen-year-old boy and spends three entire days just holding him.

Carlisle craves physical contact with those he loves.

Edward does not care for this. He's turned at the very moment in his development in which he is perfectly primed to be absolutely mortified by parental physical contact (and there's no small amount of gay panic on both their parts about it anyway). So it's still mostly just the occasional shoulder pat; the joy and surprise when Edward hugs him on occasion.

It's not until Esme arrives, and after they navigate their collective fears and traumas, that he manages to actually be touched. To have someone who hugs him, and strokes his back, and runs her fingers through his hair, who kisses not just his lips but his head, his shoulders, his chest. Sexual intimacy is his first real physical intimacy of his very long life.

So. For this prompt, a canon snuggle, and an AU snuggle for this guy for whom touching those he loves is his source of highest joy:

He could lie naked with Esme forever. And he tries to, a lot. Although they know their children are a little squicked out by the idea of hearing or sensing them having intercourse, and of course that's one reason they go to great lengths (islands!) to be separate from them, a big part of the reason they often totally relocate in order to have sex is that Carlisle really wants to just lie there, with both their clothes off, for as long as he can possibly get away with it; days if they can manage it. So they leave so that nobody has to worry about having to scramble back into pants or a dress at an inopportune time, so that he can just place his head on Esme's breasts and they can interlock legs and he can just get lost in not being entirely certain where his skin stops and hers begins. In Kairos, he finally gets to have the physical intimacy with Edward he's always longed for. This AU takes place in a world in which he had a sexual partner for eighty-five years and so his intimacy with Edward takes a different form, not to mention that Edward is still quite bashful about it all. Their favorite snuggle is to sit on the floor, with Carlisle's back against the couch and Edward using him as a recliner as he sits between Carlisle's legs. Clothes, no clothes; doesn't matter as much to these two. From there, Carlisle can run his hands through Edward's hair, kiss the nape of his neck or behind his hear, and bury his nose next to Edward's scalp to inhale his scent. They're not altogether very different things than what he would prefer to do in a fatherly way in canon; the difference is that in the AU world, the chips have fallen such that this time, Edward is willing to let him.

[dez-wade]

Is it pessimistic to say I don't think anyone will notice/care that Forever is missing beyond thinking "oh it's been awhile" if he's kidnapped and this arc will end up reaffirming to him that nobody cares for him except the Feds? Surprisingly I can only imagine Philza noticing because of the whole birdcage incident @_@

Look, I don't blame them because if you don't see it, or get a hint, you have to speculate a lot like "I know the CC is away for x amount of time, should I be worried for his character?". And you get in a weird situation of meta and RP.

That's why even if it's pretty much confirmed that something will happen to him today, I hope it's more creative. Not just "vanishing while no one is looking".

What worries me the most is when he gets back though, because I don't know what will happen it's hard to speculate. But the Brazilians have been kidnapped so much they keep being dismissed. So if he has a standard kidnapping I think genuinely no one will care. And no one ever asks Forever about his well being (except Cucurucho yesterday for some reason), you just need to see how after Happy Pills arc, a lot of people mistakenly assumed he drugged himself by choice, and instead of being super fucking worried about the fact someone was so mentally unwell that he went to Cucurucho to take away his pain, they mocked him instead.

[phanfictioncatalogue]

Strangers To Friends (2) Masterlist

Links Last Checked: September 25th, 2023

part one

A Change In The Weather (ao3) - krissyxlove

Summary: Nobody cares and the world has forgotten about me.

Those words were messily sketched and displayed in front of a young homeless man named Dan. Typically, for Dan, those words were true. What happens though when a chance of fate brings a young, successful, weatherman to him?

Nobody cares and the world has forgotten about me.

Typically, those words remained true. Today however, those words would be eaten.

A Shining Star (ao3) - Nefertiti1052 (Succubusphan)

Summary: Dan was a poor law student who loved drag queens and hoped to master the Art. Phil was having a hard time in life but wanted to help queers kids to get their life sorted and to be a good father.

A Tale of Life and Death (ao3) - croissantbleu (orphan_account)

Summary: "People always gave him way too much credit. Or they were scared of him, thinking he belonged to the “dark side of magic”. As if there was such a thing. He couldn’t remember how many times he’d explained that magic was neutral, it was merely a tool allowing to reach an end. By itself, it was neither good or bad. What truly mattered were the intentions of people who used it."

Or the one in which Phil is a necromancer, and Dan needs his help.

Chapter Two (ao3) - HandleWithCare

Summary: All Phil wanted was the newest Stephen King novel. What he found instead was even better and may have even changed his life. No matter how good or bad chapter one is, sometimes, you just have to be brave and turn to chapter two.

don't be afraid, just believe (ao3) - TsingaDark

Summary: There was a rumour on campus that someone had died in the East Wing and had been haunting it ever since. Dan, for his part, thought it was utter crap. Even if someone had died there - which he highly doubted - they would not be haunting that place because ghosts didn't even exist.

I'm Ashamed Of The Dark Places I Have Been (ao3) - ellehcorx

Summary: Phil has been punishing himself after a recent break up. He hadn’t slept in days, he’s drunk daily, and he finds himself in strangers’ beds. After stumbling into a church to take shelter from the rain, he meets Dan who helps him decrease his guilt.

It's So Meta Even This Acronym (ao3) - Dieupardonne, Mazabrei (Dieupardonne)

Summary: Dan Howell and Phil Lester lead anything but normal lives, but they were content with the direction they’d taken and happy with their current situation. But soon, they begin to realize that things aren’t right anymore; they’re not in the world they should be.

“That’s because you’re ruining our fucking lives, you sadist,” Dan said, scowling at the ceiling. He seemed to be ignoring the fact that his insolence would have consequences.

“What stupid trope are you putting us in next?” Phil asked wearily.

“It doesn’t even matter, does it?” Dan said, “They’re going to keep writing it as long as they want. They’ll find a trope.”

“But only if people read it,” Phil said.

“Then don’t read this stupid, overblown story!” Dan yelled at the ceiling, “You’re enabling this horrible author. You’re making us suffer.” While Dan was speaking, Phil had a realization.

“All of this…” Phil said in horror, “All of this dialogue we’re giving. We’re helping them shill this story.”

let chance take me to your shore (ao3) - basl

Summary: dan and phil are witches that somehow find each other.

Networking (ao3) - t_hens

Summary: Phil isn't expecting much out of the temporary job he gets at his local insurance company; a steady paycheck, a chance to make some business connections, maybe turning it into a full time position? Mostly just something to get his parents off his back for the next few months until he can figure out his next move. What he certainly isn't expecting is Dan Howell; the terribly cute guy who is definitely flirting with him and also in some sort of uncertain terms his boss. How will Phil navigate his blossoming feelings for someone who is most definitely off limits?

puppy love (ao3) - t_hens

Summary: it's just a routine day in the park for Phil and his new puppy Willow, when they get a surprise visit from a stranger named Dan and his dog Scully. the dogs become fast friends and Phil thinks that maybe he and Dan are on their way to becoming friends too.

Self-Conclusion (ao3) - ellehcorx

Summary: Fade in, start the scene. Enter Dan Howell - a 20 year old boy stood at the edge of a bridge, contemplating death. In the shadows appears Phil Lester, a stranger with a painful past who tries to talk Dan down.

She's Got the Look (ao3) - Nefertiti1052 (Succubusphan)

Summary: Diana would have never thought that being constantly late would lead to meeting the most beautiful girl she had ever seen and change her life forever.

Special Delivery (ao3) - phantasticworks

Summary: Dan Howell receives a package he definitely didn't order, but the man who did order it is... well, he's rather interesting. And the object he's ordered... well, it's odd, to say the least.

Surprise Phil-lings (ao3) - smilesaretoxic

Summary: Phil's birthday is coming up and he is in need of a cake. PJ decides to get him one with a special filling. Awkwardness, fluff, and some raunchy times ensue.

Thunder Only Happens When It's Raining (ao3) - Nefertiti1052 (Succubusphan)

Summary: Dan meets Phil at the lowest moment in his life and is immediately enchanted by him, but nobody is perfect - not even those with good intentions and a kind heart.

This is the story of two imperfect people trying to do their best, to find love and strive in life. They gravitate towards each other at every turn, sometimes dancing in harmony, other times colliding.

Under the trees and shooting stars (ao3) - croissantbleu (orphan_account)

Summary: Dan’s parents have insisted that he comes with them on a family holiday at a hiking camp in the middle of the woods, and he isn’t too happy about that for various reasons. Until he meets the son of the owners, who works there

What is the Name? (ao3) - linguisticswithlester

Summary: A curly headed barista becomes smitten with a new quiffed customer that comes into the coffee shop. Taking a chance, he makes a bold move that results in a battle of cute nicknames and feelings that could lead to a new adventure.

What Life Could Be (ao3) - Nocturnella

Summary: Dan’s life has not gone as planned. He’s trapped in a dead-end job with no formal education and no real life outside of losing himself in video games. Enter disaster in the form of Phil.

Meanwhile, the release of the new virtual reality game Half Moon Village gives Dan the escape he’s so desperately been looking for. In the game Dan can be whoever he wants, and as Cloud he meets the heroic and adorably awkward Fylgon who saves him at every turn and is always quick to share the spoils of his adventures. The only problem? Fylgon is in love with someone else. Oh, and Dan isn't even sure he's a real person.

[transhawks]

(PART 3) 1) Hawks trying to give Endy a boost here might seem contradictory to calling out P.R lines = serve for popularity purposes for "a better line" and what a great line it was, kicking off one of the central Todo-themes. "Just Watch Me." "I'm Watching You." "Look at me, Endeavor!" but faith in heroes kind of is needed, but truthfully because they've proved themselves as trustworthy to people (and villains in this current arc) and trust heroes to save them. It's a delightful contrast to Dabi's introduction being about spreading "loss of faith" like wildfire. Lmao sorry, I love all dialogue that references fire, it's so cool. Anyways, what we didn't need were the "elaborate ceremonies" the HPSC puts up, or the the kind where the heroes are just apologetic and regretful instead of proving things with their actions. That helps nobody and is just running away and hiding behind textbook humbleness. So, "Please speak more like real heroes?" who is Endeavor, but the guy who strives to work? That's how a hero should speak. You're the best the nation's got right now, the people are feeling uneasy, yet you just don't want to upset them, so you give safe answers? How will anyone leave this room feeling reassured and like something changed today, as you claim to be the intent? Showing the "bright and shiny" image of the top 10 for a huge live event is just trying to hope the light is bright enough to blind the audience to the cracks. Heroes should prove with their actions why they deserve to be called heroes, rather than saying things that make them look "better" and not step on any toes. Lowkey ties into Hawks listing ranks again with him still at No.2, he's...not very well-liked by his fellow heroes? he doesn't care to change that by speaking more politely, he puts in the work, and that's good enough for the people. This is JUST the Billboard Live, the rest of the ProHero is just soooo much Hawks being a weasel. Swapping between joking and being serious to reel Endeavor back in, Hori's strategic use of when and what his visor is covering, the hilarity of Endeavor trying to process that Hawks really is a No.2 unlike him, not interested in being ranked higher or like All Might. No competition, he likes pulling strings in the background. The type of support Endeavor never was to All Might. His "wtf am I looking at" when they were walking on the streets is hilarious, never seen Prohero work like that, granted Hawks was making a big show here so he'd have an excuse later for why they got attacked, but the surprise seems more that he's walking on the ground over flying, it seems this is real hero work he does and Endeavor is baffled because helping old ladies carry groceries was beneath him eh?

Speaking of, I'm going to back to this massive meta from hell that like 2.5k words right now, but the visor thing... I think we all said it was about truth and lies but I think we were wrong on that. It's less truth/lies and more keigo/hawks.