#web hosting explained

[srishthi1234]

How to Buy Website Hosting: A Step-by-Step Guide for Beginners

If you’re planning to launch a website, choosing the right web hosting is one of the first and most critical steps. The process can be daunting, especially if you're new to the tech world. But don’t worry! In this guide, I’ll walk you through how to buy website hosting, so you can make an informed decision and get your site live in no time.

What Is Website Hosting?

Before diving into the "how," let’s first address the "what." Website hosting is a service that allows your website to be accessible on the internet. It’s essentially the space where your website’s files, content, and data live. When someone visits your site, their browser communicates with the web host, which then delivers the files to their screen.

Different Types of Website Hosting

When you’re learning how to buy website hosting, it’s important to understand that there are several types of hosting available. Your choice will depend on the needs of your website.

Shared Hosting: This is the most common and budget-friendly option. Multiple websites share the same server, making it ideal for small businesses or blogs. However, it may have slower load times if the server gets too crowded.

VPS Hosting (Virtual Private Server): This type of hosting offers a more private server space, even though you’re still technically sharing the physical server. It’s a great middle ground between shared hosting and more expensive dedicated options.

Dedicated Hosting: If you have a large website with high traffic, dedicated hosting is your best bet. It’s pricier, but you get an entire server to yourself, giving you more control, speed, and security.

Cloud Hosting: This is a newer type of hosting where your website is hosted on a network of servers, ensuring that you’re not reliant on just one. It offers scalability, as you can easily add more resources as your site grows.

Key Factors to Consider When Buying Website Hosting

Now that you know the types of hosting, let’s move on to the factors you should consider when learning how to buy website hosting. Each of these aspects will play a role in determining whether a hosting plan is right for you.

Pricing: Hosting plans can range from a few dollars a month to hundreds. However, more expensive doesn’t always mean better. Make sure to choose a plan that fits your budget but still meets your site’s requirements. Always check for renewal rates, as they can sometimes be higher than the initial cost.

Bandwidth and Storage: These are key considerations. If your site is heavy on media or expects high traffic, you’ll need a plan with more bandwidth and storage. Many basic hosting plans offer unlimited bandwidth, but always read the fine print.

Uptime Guarantee: A host’s uptime guarantee ensures that your site remains live and accessible most of the time. Look for a host with at least a 99.9% uptime guarantee, as downtime can mean lost visitors and revenue.

Customer Support: Reliable customer support is essential, especially if you’re new to hosting. You’ll want 24/7 support, with options for live chat, email, or phone assistance. Some hosts even provide dedicated technical help.

Security Features: Your website’s security is paramount. When buying website hosting, make sure the provider offers robust security features such as SSL certificates, daily backups, and protection from malware and DDoS attacks.

Scalability: If you’re just starting, you might not need a lot of resources. But as your website grows, it’s important to choose a hosting provider that allows you to upgrade easily without much hassle.

Step-by-Step Guide on How to Buy Website Hosting

Now that we’ve covered the basics, let’s go through a step-by-step process of how to buy website hosting.

Identify Your Hosting Needs: Determine what type of website you’re building. Is it a simple blog, an e-commerce site, or a large corporate website? This will help you decide on the type of hosting you need.

Research Hosting Providers: Compare various hosting providers. Some popular options include Bluehost, HostGator, SiteGround, and GoDaddy. Look at their pricing, features, and customer reviews to get a feel for their reliability.

Choose a Plan: Once you’ve narrowed down your provider, select the plan that best suits your needs. Shared hosting is usually fine for small to medium-sized websites, while VPS or dedicated hosting may be needed for larger sites.

Register a Domain (If Needed): Many hosting companies offer a free domain registration for the first year. If you haven’t already purchased a domain, this can be a great way to save money.

Complete the Purchase: After selecting your plan and domain, proceed to checkout. Some hosting providers offer add-ons, like extra security or email services. Decide if you need these before finalizing your purchase.

Set Up Your Hosting: Once you’ve bought your hosting, you’ll receive an email with login details to your hosting dashboard. From here, you can install WordPress or other content management systems (CMS), upload files, and start building your site.

Launch Your Website: After setting everything up, all that’s left is to make your site live! Most hosting providers make this easy by offering one-click installs for WordPress and other popular platforms.

https://prinikacademy.com/how-to-buy-website-hosting/

[iorangehost]

Windows Hosting

[youcalledmebabe]

I have something controversial to say but I’m asking you to hear me out. joe liebgott lloyd dobbler

[wjmdigitaldesign]

WordPress.com vs WordPress.org: What’s the Difference and Which One Should You Choose?

If you’re thinking about launching a website or starting a blog, chances are you’ve come across WordPress. But there’s a common point of confusion: WordPress.com vs WordPress.org. At first glance, they sound like the same thing — but they’re actually quite different platforms with distinct features, pros, and cons.

In this blog post, we’ll break down the differences between the two, help you understand which one suits your needs, and guide you toward the best choice for your website goals.

What is WordPress.org?

WordPress.org is the self-hosted version of WordPress. It’s the open-source software that anyone can download for free and install on their own web hosting server. With WordPress.org, you have full control over your website.

Key Features:

Complete Customization: Install any theme or plugin, modify the code, and design your site exactly the way you want.

Ownership: You fully own your website and all its content.

Monetization Freedom: Use any ad network, sell products, offer memberships, or add affiliate links with no restrictions.

Advanced Functionality: Great for eCommerce (using plugins like WooCommerce), custom development, SEO tools, and more.

Pros:

Total control and flexibility

Thousands of free and premium plugins/themes

Full access to your site's backend and data

Ideal for business, large blogs, and complex websites

Cons:

Requires web hosting (usually $5–$15/month)

You handle security, backups, and updates (though plugins can automate much of this)

Slightly steeper learning curve for beginners

What is WordPress.com?

WordPress.com is a hosted platform created by Automattic (the company behind WordPress). It offers a simplified, all-in-one solution for building a website without worrying about hosting, maintenance, or technical tasks.

Key Features:

No Hosting Needed: Hosting is included. No need to buy a separate plan or domain (though custom domains are available on paid plans).

Easy to Start: Perfect for beginners who want a fast and simple setup.

Maintenance-Free: WordPress.com handles updates, security, and backups.

Pros:

Free basic plan available

No setup or maintenance required

User-friendly dashboard

Great for hobby blogs, personal websites, or simple portfolios

Cons:

Limited customization (especially on the free plan)

Cannot upload custom themes or plugins unless on Business or higher plan

Limited monetization options on lower-tier plans

WordPress.com branding unless you upgrade

WordPress.com vs WordPress.org: Quick Comparison Table

Feature

WordPress.com

WordPress.org

Hosting

Included

You provide (self-hosted)

Cost

Free with paid upgrades

Free software, hosting cost

Custom Themes & Plugins

Limited (paid plans only)

Unlimited

Monetization Freedom

Limited

Full control

eCommerce

Only on paid plans

Full eCommerce support

Maintenance

Handled for you

You manage it

Suitable For

Beginners, personal blogs

Businesses, pros, devs

Which One Should You Choose?

Choose WordPress.com if:

You want a hassle-free experience and don’t want to manage hosting or security.

You’re a beginner with no technical background.

You just need a simple blog or portfolio site.

You’re okay with limited flexibility or willing to pay for premium features.

Choose WordPress.org if:

You want full control and the ability to customize everything.

You’re building a business website, store, or scalable project.

You need to monetize your content freely.

You're comfortable (or willing to learn) about managing your own hosting.

Final Thoughts

Both WordPress.com and WordPress.org offer powerful tools for creating websites, but the right choice depends on your goals. If you’re starting out or want something easy and low-maintenance, WordPress.com is a solid option. If you're aiming for maximum control, customization, and scalability, WordPress.org is the way to go.

Still unsure? Start with WordPress.com to get your feet wet — and when you’re ready for more freedom, you can always migrate to WordPress.org.

Need help deciding or building your site? Contact WJM Digital Design for professional guidance, custom WordPress development, and support tailored to your goals. info@wjmdigitaldesign.com

[hemantverma]

[la-patrona-magdalena]

Reading list/Fanfic Masterlist Yandere!Batfamily X Reader

NONE OF THESE FANFICS BELONG TO ME, this is more of a personal reading list of fanfics I follow and such, all the links lead you to the creators' direct blogs.

Almost all the fanfics in the 'platonic' section are with Neglected!Reader, I'm addicted to that trope.

More than one link will lead you to the authors' master list instead of a masterlist for the series. This is because they don't have a dedicated list for the series, and it was easier for me to keep them this way. (There are also links to the first chapter, in this case, the author probably left the other chapters there, in addition to imagines, headcanons, and drabbles on their own.) I thought about adding a short description below the links to explain what the fanfic is about… maybe I'll do it later or just leave it as it is.

Not - series

Again and. Again - series

Bruce hears Reader call someone else "dad." - drabble

Reader who only recognizes Alfred - drabble

[UN] Fair - series

Adorned in pearls (although Bruce here is not platonic…) - one shot

Batfamily with a Shallow Reader - imagine

Reader in Squid Games - imagine

Crack Baby - series

Smalltown Meta!Reader - series

Forget me not - series

No more Chances - series

Inmorta! Reader - series

Undoing Fate - series (it's not yandere but it has my favorite cliche so…)

Tip toes - series

Meet The Waynes - series

Bring back the dead - series

Obsessive reader in the shadows - imagine

There are two fanfictions here, the first fic doesn't have a name and I don't know what to name it. - series

Who said money can´t buy hapinness (considering the # I assume that the batfam is platonic….but I'm not sure) - series

Between life and death, death is tempting - series

Ain´t no sushine - series

Beyond the Bat - series

Crow choir - series

Waterbone - drabble

Marine!Reader - one shot? drabble?

Saboteur - series/imagine

Unwanted embrace - series

I'm almost sure this was one of the pioneering stories in this trope. - one shot

Little Demon - one shot

Goodbye World - one shot

Batsis wakes up in a fanfic - imagine? drabble?

Batfam playing with Reader - I think it's a drabble…I don't know

Pity Party - series

Yandere Al Ghuls! - series

How would they spend time with you after the kidnapping? -drabble

You´re a fucking weird hacker - one shot

Lucid Dreams - series

Ghost of the Past - series

Soulamate Soul Animal - series

Good Look(includes more DC yanderes characters) - series

Web Bound (It is NOT yandere, but it does have obsessive characters) - Series

Bug like Angel - series

The other family - one shot

Batman! Damian Wayne x Robin! Reader - one shot?

Children!Reader who loves Tim more than Dick - headcanon

Yandere!Batfam Headcanons - headcanon xd

Advantages and disadvantages of Neglected! Reader - Headcanon(?)

When your family only cherish you after your death - series

Yandere Batfam x Neglected!Elle Woods!Reader - series

My pathetic family - series(?)

The ballad of a bygone blight - series

Batmon and his baby -drabble/ Scenery (bruce is romantic)

Reader happy to be ignored - drabble/Scenery

What We Want - series

The sinfull Allure (the story is not yandere, but it has the batboys, and I love this reverse harem) - series

Seven Days a Week - Hit me Hard and sort - two series

First married to Bruce - one shot

As Yanderes´ Universe - one shot series?

Polyamory with Aged Up! Damian Wayne and John Kent - imagine

Sisters!Reader x Batboys - Headcanon? (according to the hashtags)

Greetings - drabble?

How Dick and Damian would handle learnig reader is dating somebody? - Drabble?

Addictive - Series

Do You Think We´ll Be In Love Forever? (includes more DC characters) - various drabbles

Perfect Life - one shot

Batboys and reader who knows - headcanon set?

Checkmate - one shot

Tim Drake x nursing student!Reader - one shot

Remedial Lesson (18+) - One shot

Dommy Mommy!Reader - headcanon

Reader hosted by Tim Drake - one shot

Yandere self-aware Dick Grayson - headcanon set

Moon Prism Power! - imagine

What types of yanderes would the Batboys be? - headcanon

Yandere!Batboys x Reader HC - Headcanon

Dick Grayson is your coworker - Drabble (?)

Muse: The Painting - one shot

[prokopetz]

I think the real reason most websites are janky as hell to use these days is because web developers have become so specialised that nobody really understands how anything works anymore. The other day I had to explain why hosting critical Javascript libraries on a third-party CDN is a bad idea to a "lead developer" who genuinely didn't know the difference between server-side versus client-side scripting.

[quarterlifekitty]

The aforementioned dark circus!AU

cw: slavery/human trafficking

Price is the ringmaster, and co-owner of the show. He’s the man who bought you from the auction block, because he saw something in you. He’s the man that holds your freedom in his hands.

Who are you? You’re the costumer for the circus. You spend endless hours in a cramped fitting room, fixing rips and tears, sewing sequins onto bodysuits— fighting with performers over what would suit them.

Ghost is a clown and an illusionist. He makes it a point to get on your good side— he needs your handiwork to make his act. Secret pockets, flaps, and panels on his costume are an integral part of it all. He bought his freedom years ago, but remains loyal to Price for reasons unknown to you.

Gaz is a trapeze artist. You receive a lot of gifts from him— apologies for how often his tight costume is prone to ripping, and what a pain it is to replace the embellishments in a way that’ll hold up through the whole show. He’s graceful in the air, and an incorrigible flirt on the ground.

Soap is the daredevil. He sustained a brain injury a long time ago, and it’s dulled his sense of pain immensely. You spend as little time on his costumes as possible— knowing most of them are one-time uses before they’re rendered into scraps with scorch marks. He’s constantly getting kicked out of your little workroom— if he’s got no costume to discuss, he’s got no business with you, you’ve tried to explain.

König is the Goliath, the strong man, able to lift other performers with ease as well as a whole host of other things. His height staggers the crowds, emphasized further by some cleverly integrated platforms in his shoes. His size makes it nearly impossible to make him things unless it’s entirely from scratch— something he apologizes for profusely.

Nikolai is a beast master. A natural command over tigers, elephants, and any other caged creature he happens upon. And he looks at you like you’re about to be a part of his menagerie.

Rudy is a roustabout— he works the set pieces and props, suspends the tent— and has to wrap it all back up with. It’s time to move on. It makes little time or reason for him to speak to you, but he always makes a point to visit you and bid you goodnight when he can manage it.

Graves is a fire-spitter. Often spotted without a shirt and holding a bottle of liquor by the neck, he was acquired when Price’s circus took over another. He’s got marks of disobedience— whipped when he tried to run away— scars still plain to see as they web across his back. He’s always asking you to run away with him— and you’d can’t for the life of you figure out how serious he’s intending to be.

You? You want to keep your head down and earn enough to buy your freedom in a few years. Then? You’ll say goodbye forever, and if you ever smell sawdust again it’ll be too soon.

Your hopes are dashed when Price comes to check on you late into the night. He hears you singing the way you do when no one is around, sees you weaving a needle in and out to the rhythm, looking ethereal even under the lamplight that flickers every few minutes or so.

Now he’s looking to make you the jewel of the entire circus— taking center stage with your costume and voice for all to enjoy. Something that will surely keep you chained to the circus indefinitely— Price isn’t known for letting star attractions walk away.

[dirtyvulture]

BBB

Natasha Romanoff x Beefy!Sergeant!Reader*

18+ only read at your own risk

Word count: 3248

Requested by anon: Hi i love your work..you don't have to do this request if you don't want.. i was kind of was wondering since we haven't heard from Sergeant Nat and reader. If we could hear from them? I was thinking since Nat is always the confident reassured one in that universe like maybe something happens where shes not sure where she stand with reader? Like jealous or maybe reader lets one of her military friends borrow her laptop and they use it to watch porn...and nat finds it and thinks its reader. And nat kind of loses her mind in a way that we havent seen. (Not like crazy but for the first time shes like am i enough). And reader is high key oblivious bc she worships nat. Some communication to sort out and then smutty times. Only if you want. If not i look forward to whatever you post yay. 

AN: *Reader has a penis, no pronouns used.

Thanks for the idea, anon! This was a lot of fun to write. :)

This is Part 5 in my Sergeant Beef series. Read the first one here.

“Hey, can I borrow your laptop?” Sam asks, poking his head into your room. 

“Why?” You don’t even look at him, focused on you video game on the tiny television mounted to your wall.

“I dropped mine in the lake, so I had to buy a new one but it won’t get shipped off until later this week,” Sam explains. 

“Okay,” you say, hardly listening to him as you race your little car across the screen to bump the giant soccer ball towards the goal. “It’s in my room on the–”

“I know where it is. Thanks.” Sam whisks in and helps himself. 

“Close the door on your way out!” you call, just in time to hear the door slam behind him. Turning your whole focus back to your game, your fingers mash the buttons to a triumphant win.

***********************************************************************

A few days later, Natasha is over at your apartment. While the two of you had discussed a thousand times moving in together, you had always stalled or walked around the subject. Natasha wasn’t sure if it was because you were nervous what the public’s perception would be of your relationship, or if you preferred your own private space too much to give it up. Ever since the deployment, you had been more likely to retreat and hide away (even from Natasha) when you were upset or moody. She wondered if it was a side effect of your PTSD, but you never seemed ready for that conversation so she left it alone.

For dinner, you grilled some steaks (setting off the smoke detector in your apartment) while Natasha made a side of mashed potatoes and green beans. Afterwards, you went to take a shower while Natashas lounged around and found a movie on Netflix for the two of you to watch. She sits on the couch, opening your laptop and finding the web browser. She looks up Netflix and then browses through the recommendations on your home page, but none of them pique her interest.

She goes onto Google to search what other people are recommending and wades through a sea of titles and descriptions to find one. Swapping back and forth between tabs, she finds a website with a host of titles and flips back and forth until she finds a movie that is both on the list and currently on Netflix. But in the process, she loses track of the tab and accidentally closes it, silently cursing to herself, before going to check the history to find it again.

But what she finds in the history is not what she had been looking for.

Natasha feels almost scandalized when she sees the words “big busty blondes” in your search history, followed by a list of pornsites. While she knew you watched such videos in her absence, she didn’t know what genre you were into, and now a deep sinking feeling of insecurity fills her. She was not blonde, nor was she particularly busty after the years of hard workouts had shrank some of her assets a little. You always told her she had the perfect body, but now she wasn’t quite sure if she should believe you.

“Nat? Did you pick a movie?” You poke your head out of the bathroom. You’re not wearing a shirt and your wet hair is dripping water down your chest, emphasizing the lines of your muscles. Natasha can see the bullet scar on your ribs from the deployment that almost ended your life. But you walked away with every member of your team alive, and your tale of bravery had become something of a living legend in the community. 

She knows you could have any woman you wanted. She had seen the way the recruits eyed you and how bold the other brass were with you. Before your promotion to sergeant, you were often overlooked and completely ignored. Natasha, perhaps a little selfishly, always considered herself the catch in your relationship: she was one of a handful of female sergeants with outstanding credentials, and looked great in and out of a uniform. But maybe she thought too highly of herself. You had developed into a very competent sergeant, were extremely good-looking, and had the most lovable personality anyone could ask for.

What if you didn’t want her anymore? What if you wanted someone younger, or someone you could start a family with? Natasha hadn’t yet disclosed to you her inability to have children, but if the subject ever came up, she knew you’d need no other excuse to walk away.

“Nat? Did you pick out a movie?” you ask again.

“Yes,” Natasha says. “We can watch Trolls.”

“Okay. That sounds fun.”  

You come out in a sweatshirt with matching gray sweatpants and join Natasha on the couch. Instinctively, you put your arm around her shoulder and she snuggles against you, letting you rest your head against hers.

You seem to enjoy the goofy children’s movie, laughing out loud at the jokes and cheering when the main characters hug by the end. But Natasha can’t focus for a second, still thinking about the search history on your laptop. She didn’t even know if it was something she should bring up, but it was already eating her alive to think that she wasn’t good enough for you.

Natasha didn’t know if she would be able to survive without you. She would have to do everything she could to keep you by her side.

***********************************************************************

“Give me a sec,” Natasha calls, hurriedly slipping her boots on. She checks herself in the mirror one final time before opening her apartment door to see you.

“Hi, Nat–oh.” Your expression goes flat.

“What’s wrong?” Natasha asks, her stomach twisting in knots. Maybe this had been a bad idea.

“You dyed your hair,” you say, blinking at the short blonde hair she was now sporting.

“You don’t like it?” she asks, her worry growing by the second. She had dropped a significant sum at the salon on base to cut and dye her hair. Perhaps this had been a severe overreaction on her part. 

“Oh. No, um, it looks very nice,” you stutter. 

Natasha is not convinced in the slightest. Her face flushes red and she bites her lip to stop herself from crying in frustration. “That’s okay,” she mutters more to herself than you. “Where are we going again?” she asks, even though she knows every detail of the outing she had planned with you.

“The gym first, then we can get lunch and go grab groceries,” you list off, seemingly oblivious to her awkwardness. 

“Yes, that’s right. Okay, let’s go,” she replies sullenly.

***********************************************************************

Natasha isn’t sure what else she can do to hold your attention after the hair dying incident. She tries to be extra doting with you, but all of her efforts seem to go completely unnoticed. You only say “thank you” once when she gets you your favorite chocolate bar from the commissary. The next time the two of you are in bed together, Natasha feels like she has to guide you through all the motions and you fuck her with a concerningly low level of enthusiasm. Natasha is convinced you’ve found someone else and just the thought of losing you makes her sick. 

She’s nearly sent over the edge when she finally gets a text from you:

From Y/N: Can you come over tonight? I want to talk

Natasha feels like the rug has been pulled out from under her feet. Sweat breaks out on her forehead and her stomach starts to hurt like she had a bad meal. What if she just didn’t go to see you? Would you really still break up with her over text?

Her body seems to have a mind of her own as she responds:

To Y/N: Ok

***********************************************************************

“Thanks for coming over,” you say, welcoming Natasha into your apartment. She steps in guardedly, wondering if you’re hiding your new girlfriend under the couch. Or maybe she’s already in your bed. She shuffles down the hallway to subtly peer into your bedroom, which is empty.

“What did you want to talk about?” Natasha isn’t one to dance around the elephant in the room. Besides, she doesn’t want to draw this out any longer than it needs to be.

“Oh. Um…” You sound caught off guard. “Well, I was thinking that–”

“You want to break up with me.” Natasha can’t stop the tears forming in her eyes. She wipes them away, angry at herself for showing such weakness already.

“What? What makes you think that?” Your shock is so genuine, Natasha almost wants to believe you.

Natasha hides her face behind her hand. “I saw it on your laptop last week. The kind of porn you were watching–”

“Porn? I use incognito,” you say. “Unless that doesn’t actually hide things…” you add in a mumble.

“Your search history said you looked up…” Natasha takes a breath. “‘Big busty blondes,’” she repeats, hating the way the words sound off her tongue.

“What?” You sound confused now. “That’s…I don’t watch that kind of stuff. Wait, is that why you dyed your hair blonde?”

“No,” Natasha lies. “But I saw it on your laptop!” she insists, hastily changing the subject.

You pause for a moment, then start shaking your head with a chuckle. “I’m gonna rip him a new one,” you mutter. Then louder, you explain, “Sam borrowed my laptop last week because his was broken. I’m guessing he used it to…you know…” Your expression turns into one of disgust, and Natasha matches it. 

“Oh. So, you’re not into big busty blondes?” Natasha is embarrassingly desperate for clarification.

“No, I’m not.” You take a step towards her and hold out your hands. “But I do have a thing for hot redheads who could totally kick my butt.”

“I know,” Natasha says, taking your hands and leaning up to kiss you. Her lips lift into a smile when you return her kiss with more passion than you had all week, wrapping your arms around her and pulling her flush against you. You dig your fingers into her thighs, lightly rolling your hips, and when she feels your hard bulge against her stomach and all of her doubts are cast away immediately. Her face burns in shame when she realizes how quickly she had jumped to the wrong conclusion. You weren’t going anywhere. You were totally in love with her and wanted no one else.

“Wait, so what did you want to talk about?” Natasha asks, trying to ignore the arousal building in her core as you hump her.

“Oh! Um…” Your face reddens, as if you’re so turned on yourself you forgot why you asked her to come. “Uh…I wanted to ask if…you would like to move in with me? Or if I could move into your apartment? Or we could find a new place together…”

Natasha feels like she’s gotten whiplash from the subject change. She had come here thinking you were breaking up with her, but instead you actually wanted to move in with her? Just when she had thought it was never going to happen.

“Why the change?” she asks.

You shrug your massive shoulders. “We spend so much time together as it is. And I was mostly nervous because you know I have those night terrors a lot, but…” You sigh. “I realized I get them a lot less when I wake up next to you.” Natasha wants to melt in your arms. “And it would be really nice if I got to wake up next to you every day. And eat every meal with you. And–”

Natasha cuts you off with a hard kiss. “Yes,” she pants, groping for the tie on your sweatpants and pulling them down. “Of course I’ll move in with you.”

“Nat,” you whine when she grabs your cock. She feels it throb in her hand and her arousal spikes. As high as her own sex drive was, there was little else that turned Natasha on more than to see how excited you were for her. She pushes you towards the bedroom and you understand without needing words, obediently sitting down on your bed and pulling you on top of her. You grunt when her weight lands on your thighs and Natasha immediately props herself on her knees; sometimes she forgets about the injury on your right thigh that still causes you pain sometimes.       

“Sorry baby,” she whispers while leaning in to kiss your cheek. It had been a long and sometimes frustrating journey to get back to the same level of intimacy the two of you shared after the deployment ambush and your recovery. The medicines you were on had drastically affected your mood (and performance) and there were still some positions you could no longer do because of the strain it put on your body. But Natasha had been patient and gentle with you, even when all she wanted to do was fuck you senseless. Over time your strength and stamina had come back, and Natasha was thrilled you could still please her in bed. 

She leans back and takes her shirt off while you mirror her. You’re almost back to your weight as before the deployment, but the physical therapy has encouraged you to work out even harder, so you are more muscular and toned than before. Natasha eyes your body hungrily, her hand reaching out to trace the scar on your ribs. While she hates the memory attached to your scar, she can appreciate how much more badass it makes you look.

“Nat,” you say, and she breaks out of her thoughts. “Is everything okay?”

“Yes.” She pushes you to lie on your back, rolling her clothed lower body against yours. “Everything is very okay.” Her hands skate across your warm skin, squeezing your biceps before resting on your chest, balancing herself as she rocks back and forth. Even though you’re still wearing boxers, Natasha can feel the hardness of your dick pressing against her butt.

“All ready for me?” she hums, digging her nails lightly into your chest.

“Always,” you respond, rolling your hips to match her rhythm. 

“Hmm.” Natasha contemplates how she wants you today. You almost never call the shots in bed, but you have no problem with Natasha taking control most of the time. She likes how submissive you are to her and your willingness to please her even at your own expense. But she isn’t feeling selfish today and wants you to relax and enjoy too. 

Her body seems to have a mind of its own as she humps along your abs, eventually pushing her panties to the side so you can feel her heat on your stomach. 

“Nat,” you whine, gripping onto her waist to guide her movements. 

“Just let me ride you,” she says, lifting off of you for a moment to remove her panties completely, and the two of you moan when she settles back on you. You flex your abs until Natasha swears she could grate cheese on them. She angles her hips back and widens her legs so she can drag her pussy along the ridges of your abs, smearing her wetness everywhere. “Fuck, you feel so good, baby,” she moans.

“So do you,” you say, your hands tightening around her waist. 

Natasha moves her hips faster, sliding back until she can feel your cock practically poking a hole through your boxers. She’s just warming herself (and you) up and doesn’t want to rush to the main event. But as she hears your whines and feels the tension in your body, all she wants is for you to flip her over and fuck her until she can’t walk.  

“Can you do exactly what I ask you to?” Natasha pants, the building arousal in her stomach almost painful now.

“Yes,” you gasp. “Yes, Sergeant. Whatever you want.”

The use of Natasha’s title makes her pussy clench around nothing. Her body aches for you and she’s done playing around.

“Good. I want you to get on your knees and fuck me,” she demands, abruptly climbing off of you and presenting her backside to you. You scramble to obey, wasting no time lining up your cock with her soaking pussy and pushing in eagerly. Natasha inhales sharply when your length stretches her out, filling her perfectly and reaching places she could never reach with her hand or a toy. When you start moving your hips, she whimpers and moans, gripping handfuls of the bedsheets so you don’t slam her into the headboard.

She spasms around you with every stroke, clenching tightly and trying to draw you in as deep as you can go. Natasha loves to hear you moan, knowing she was the cause of them, and more of her slick leaks out around your cock. 

“Fuck, Nat,” you grunt, your thighs slapping against her butt with every thrust. “You always feel amazing.”

“Harder,” she begs. “I want you to cum when I do.”

“I’ll try,” you respond, your breathing ragged as you start to falter in your rhythm. 

“Fuck, you’re in me so deep,” Natasha moans, wishing that despite your already above-average size, you had more to give her. She lets go of the bedsheets and slips her hand down between her legs, rubbing her clit for added stimulation. “Don’t you dare stop,” she warns, noticing the way your legs are shaking and your thrusts are losing their power.

“I won’t,” you whimper, and Natasha is not convinced you’ll be able to last much longer. Her hand glides back up to her stomach, where she can feel the bulge of your cock through her skin. That alone nearly sends her over the edge, but she has one more request from you.

“Bite me,” Natasha pants, motioning to her right trapezius muscle. Normally, she is very against you marking her during sex because she doesn’t want to worry about hiding them, but now she is panting at the thought of you finally staking your claim on her.

“Bite you?” you say, sounding extremely timid.

“Yes!” she growls, not wanting to repeat herself. “If you don’t bite me, I won’t let you cum.”

You moan and tighten your grip on her waist. Natasha feels your cock throbbing inside her, but she knows you won’t finish without her permission. The bed creaks as your weight shifts and she feels your chest press against her back as you lean over her. She hums in anticipation, feeling your breath across the back of her shoulder. Your teeth graze her skin lightly, your hesitancy obvious. 

“Y/N,” she moans, pushing back into you and squeezing your length. “If you don’t fucking bite me–”

Your teeth suddenly clamp down sharply and Natasha keens, gushing around you and not even noticing you finish inside her. White spots of pure pleasure burst behind her eyelids and she feels cum drip down her thighs. It feels like she’s riding out the high forever, but when she finally unwinds, she feels your weight pressing into her back and a dull stinging in her shoulder. She twists her head to see the clear imprint of your teeth in her skin, the flesh reddening already.

“Sorry if that was too hard,” you say softly, as if you’re embarrassed by following her instructions.

“Nonsense,” she says, reaching behind her to cup the back of your neck. She pulls your head down against hers and nuzzles against your cheek. “Next time, you can bite me harder.”

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

AN: Sorry to Sam lol

Please like, reblog, and comment! Follow for more content. 🥰

[iwillstabyou]

TMAGP 31 - A Computer Nerd’s Breakdown Of The Error Logs

It’s round 3, bitches! (tumblr crashed twice when I was writing this so I’ve had to start again multiple times. I do in fact see the irony, considering the subject matter)

I was listening to TMAGP 31 and as a computer nerd, oh my god those error messages just HIT DIFFERENT. There are so many subtle details hiding in those lines that a typical non-computery person would probably miss, so I feel it is my duty to explain them and their possible implications. So that’s why I’ve decided to fully break down each part of the error report, complete with what they could potentially suggest — think of this as “the TMAGP theorist’s guide to deciphering Chester’s yapping”

So without further ado, let’s get this party started…

(NOTE: lines from the transcript are in red, ‘translations’ are in purple, jmj specific stuff is is green, explanations are in black)

Starting off with Category: fatal programmer error, notice it says programmer, not program. There is nothing wrong with the code - the user has truly fucked up. Uh oh, Colin has made a big mistake…

Also, clever double meaning here with the word fatal. Obviously we know it was fatal to Colin (RIP king 🥲), but error logs also typically have a criticality level describing if immediate action needs to be taken. There are 6 commonly used levels, with the most critical being, yep you guessed it, ‘fatal’ - this means that whatever Colin was doing was a critical threat to the system. In other words, Colin had figured out the problem and was dangerously close to fixing it so Freddie just went “oh shit, we need to deal with this guy quickly or we are in serious trouble.”

Then we’ve got the next line, attempted host compromise (the Errno611 isn’t significant - error codes vary from system to system). When it comes to network terminology, a host is basically just any device on the network, so in full this line basically means “somebody’s tried to damage part of the network.” Importantly, “host” seems to suggest that the computers aren’t the source of this evil but merely a vessel for it. Freddie is just the mouthpiece for these supernatural forces - a bit like a non-sentient (as far as we know…) avatar. Whatever these forces are, they didn’t come from within/they weren’t created by Freddie.

(NOTE: I will come back to jmj=null in a bit)

The program traceback, Traceback <module> by extension BECHER, is rather interesting. A network extension is a way of providing network access to remote users (think along the lines of a VPN) by creating a personal direct ‘route’ to the network. Therefore if it’s the subject of an error report, it means there’s been an issue with data transmission along that path. So this bit means “there’s a problem with this specific network route that’s allocated to Colin.” However, the darker implication here is that Colin is an extension of Freddie. Although he wasn’t initially a part of all of this, he’s become tangled in the web (no pun intended) to the point that he and Freddie are inseparably intertwined. The OIAR employees may be able to quit their jobs, but they’ll still be a part of Freddie…

There isn’t much to say about Host=self.host in this context. It’s just convention when it comes to object oriented programming. Not important here.

Extension BECHER compromised isn’t just saying “there’s an issue here.” It’s saying “there’s an issue here that is a serious threat to network operation.” In other words, Freddie’s going “uh oh. Colin needs to be dealt with.”

The next bit is pretty self explanatory. I really don’t think I need to explain what <hardware damage_crowbar> means for you guys to understand. This bit made me laugh so hard. One thing that’s interesting though is that it gave it a DPHW, so Freddie processed this like it was an incident… Perhaps this fully confirms that the ‘thing’ controlling Freddie is of the same origin as the cases - it’s not something else entirely?

And now onto Administrator privilege revoked. This was the moment when I fully realised “oh no. Colin is fucked,” because any control that Colin may have had over the situation is now gone for good. Freddie’s basically just said “fuck you Colin. You’re not in charge anymore. I am.”

As you can probably guess, Unexpected data isolated/resolved just means that the crowbar’s been dealt with and the program can run as usual. Similarly, the Colin threat is fixed now he’s not an administrator i.e. he can no longer control the system. However, it then gets weird with Independent operation permissions revoked… It’s not saying Colin can’t use the network independently, it’s saying that Colin can’t be used independently of the network. Remember what I was saying earlier about Colin being a part of Freddie? Yeah, well now he purely is a part of Freddie. They’re turning our boy into data!

NOTE: I know in the audio it said everything was discarded but I’m going by the transcript. Idk why they’re different

You know it’s a bad sign when you hear Re config: self.host - Freddie’s evolving. The network is literally reconfiguring itself to now include Colin. And then Freddie goes through each of his alchemical elements one by one and fucking deletes them! How rude. You go and eat this man only to spit everything out!? I guess he’s feeling generous though, because he decides to keep the sulphur, which in alchemy, refers to the soul… If this isn’t just a coincidence, then that means Colin’s actual soul has been uploaded to Freddie. That could be really cool. And messed up. But mostly cool.

Starting with the final line, everyone knows what New administrator permissions assigned means, but we don’t know yet who they’ve been assigned to. Maybe it’s Gwen? Maybe it’s a new character? Maybe there is no system administrator anymore? It’s a mystery.

Now that’s out the way, let’s get on to the real juicy stuff…

The top few lines are pretty simple - it’s Freddie’s way of saying “Colin was a problem. We ate him. Now he’s not a problem anymore.” The next line, however, is a reminder that none of this is simple” - .jmj error not resolved. There it is again. The infamous jmj error. What does it mean? Jon? Martin? Jonah? Is that you???? Nobody knows. One thing we do know though is that jmj=null (from the start of the error log). Now when it comes to interpreting values, null is weird. It’s not zero, it’s not empty, it’s sort of nothing but it’s not nothing. It’s just null. It means no value, but it doesn’t mean that the variable doesn’t have a value (if that makes any sense to you guys???). Ooh I think I know how to explain it?? Imagine you’re Jonathan Sims, head archivist of the Magnus Institute and you’re digitising some archived ID photos when you find one without a name. The recorded name in the database would be null - you can’t put anything in particular, but that doesn’t mean the person in the photo doesn’t have a name. I guess null means unknown or missing here. So basically, what jmj=null means is that the jmj is unknown and that is a problem because it can’t get ignored/it is important. So what it’s basically saying is that jmj is a mystery not only to us, but also to Freddie.

Take a look at Data integration cycle ongoing <0.02%> - Data integration is the process of combining data from multiple sources into a single source of truth. There are 4 stages: data ingestion, cleaning, transformation, and unification. Thanks to the whole Colin ordeal, I’m sure you are all quite familiar with these stages by now (and that, students, is what we call a case study!). The peculiar thing here though is that we’ve just witnessed most of the data integration cycle - surely it should be higher than 0.02%? Yes, that’s correct. It should be far higher than that. It makes no sense. UNLESS this isn’t about Colin. Most of Colin’s data has probably already integrated. This is something else entirely - something so much bigger and foreign than these computers were designed for (the only comparison I can think of is trying to run the sims 4 with all expansion packs on a 15 year old laptop. It really shouldn’t work, and it probably won’t, but it’s gonna try regardless). This seems to follow on nicely from the jmj=null comments above, because Freddie is clearly struggling to integrate something (hence System function margins down to 82%), and when you try to read data that hasn’t been fully integrated with the system, you end up with a lot of missing & unknown values. Sound familiar? Yep, that’s right - until more data is synchronised, many values will be null, like our good friend jmj. Why is it taking so long to integrate jmj? We don’t know. Perhaps its origins are so supernatural and otherworldly that it’s simply not tangible enough for Freddie to process it? That’s what I think at the moment, at least.

So yeah, that’s my line by line analysis done! Hope you found that helpful/interesting. This podcast is so well written I’m actually going insane! Jonny and Alex, you are the guys of all time! As I’ve already said, feel free to expand on any of this - I’d love to hear your theories

Signed, your friendly neighbourhood computer nerd who is very autistic about TMAGP :)

[hussyknee]

Link to video

Link to linktree in Polly's bio

There's SO much great stuff in her linktree, especially for USAmericans.

Link to GFMs hosted on Polly's bio: Rawan, Abedalrahman, Abood and Fatima,

Link to Uncommitted Movement: TikTok, Web

Link to Operation Olive Branch: TikTok, Linktree

Link to GFMs vetted by OOB

Edit 1: alt text enabled in images.

Edit 2: Video transcript provided by @alltheverses

[Transcript and description: Tiktok by @thepocketreport shows a person with a denim jackets, nose ring, and chin-length hair talking.) If you're feeling hopeless of helpless about the genocide happening in Gaza or conflicted about the election and the Harris campaign, I have two, actually three tangible things you can do right now.

First is to follow, interact with and familiarize yourself with the Uncommitted Movement. They're tagged below and explain everything so much better on their page. But they're a very effective movement leveraging anti war electoral power and Democrats' own governing systems to try and influence the Biden administration's Gaza policies and hopefully the Harris campaign's as well.

Which brings me to the second thing, which is going to their profile and watching their video about the Not Another Bomb movement. Going to their bio and getting involved. This is the Uncommitted Movement page. (Displays @uncommitedmvmnt profile with several videos. Speaker's head circles around the video for "The Not Another Bomb Campaign".) And this is the Not Another Bomb Campaign video. (Returns to regular view of the speaker.) The Not Another Bomb Campaign is similarly utilizing the electoral power of the anti war movement in order to push through an arms embargo. Theory being that we are not gonna to get a ceasefire until the US stops sending bombs to Isreal. Pretty straightforward.

And third, if you are able to, is to keep donating to Palestinian families trying to leave or get resources. I don't know what's happening with the algorithm but we're seeing a lot less of them, but that doesn’t mean they don't exist. There are two families in my bio who are still trying to get out and get medical help. And if you go to Operation Olive Branch there are hundreds.

We've all heard the thing about looking for the helpers when things are hopeless and you don't know what to do, and in this situation, those helpers are organizers. /end transcript.]

[insidemyrottenbrain]

Henry gets jealous because you spend time with Richard

The risk of jealousy - TSH

Henry Marchbanks Winter x GN!Reader

Dearest anonymous, I hope you can forgive him and his denial of jealousy.

The sharp claw of jealousy finally scratches the untouchable Henry.

I’ve always been incredibly particular about whom I associate with. The people around me need to be worthy. Now, I am well aware that my choice of words may make me sound arrogant, so allow me to explain: I want them to have shared interests, to be able to hold late-night debates on esoteric topics, while giving me a sense of belonging and consequently not tiring me out socially. I do not ask for much, really. Alas, one cannot always get what one desires.

The little group of which I’m currently a part of is… pleasant. The twins regularly host dinners which are, of course, the birthplace of many fights and arguments regarding the most trivial subjects that usually end up with Henry winning. Francis unhesitatingly puts his aunt’s house at our disposal whenever desiderium naturae strikes us and amusingly complains about some disease or other the whole way there. I even consider some of Bunny’s jokes witty on the rare occasions when he stops being insufferable. Unfortunately, they all give me a shallow sense of belonging that only manages to make itself felt in transit moments. However, Henry is different. With him, I feel content reading in silence after a long day, waking up in the same bed, legs intertwined under the soft cotton sheets he insists on buying with Apolon tugging at our lazy eyelids or simply challenging one another’s knowledge on whatever topic interests us at a given moment. A continuous childlike rendez-vous.

I do not know why I have been so platonically attracted to Richard of late. When he first joined our Greek class, he did not strike me as someone who would manage to integrate his lowly self into our complexly layered group, or even more, someone who would enjoy my presence. He was and still is flawed and ordinary. However, this normality flowing through every habit, every movement, or expression is a strange refresh in an intangible web of meticulously tangled appearances and facades. Richard is not some ancient scholar buried in paradoxical ideals, Gods-praising rituals, and glorious beliefs, but a modern human. He is aware of the current world, unisolated, present, an active participant. Not only does he attend parties but he also drinks, kisses, and loves strangers. Though an exaggeration to the unknowing eye, he seems to me quite the Epicurean in a cult of Stoics (excluding Bunny).

Despite my writings above which one might foolishly mistake as praise on my part, I must now dive into Richard’s own tendency to fictitiousness. He throws, here and there, long, lavish fabrications (with the aid of which he becomes unconsciously arrogant) and slight inexactitudes he considers too small to pass unnoticed by the attentive ear. And according to my fate and against my trusted intuition, I found myself unable to stop listening whenever he started talking about his (fake) childhood in California filled with swimming pools and orange groves and dissolute, charming show-biz parents, teenage years with a new girlfriend every night, the newest dramas (if they truly do exist and are not yet other fictions) circling Hampden.

There is a quirk. I notice it now, when we’re all standing in the day room of Francis’, or rather his aunt’s, manor. Charles is playing the piano filling the room with gifts for ears, showing off as he always does, while Bunny comments on one rhythm or another, challenging him, fueling him further. Everything is normal, except for one detail that does not escape me. Henry grows more agitated with every single one of Richard’s grant histoires. Albeit, the so-called agitations are rather minuscule, but I pride myself in being able to distinguish them. A small frown, creasing his pale forehead just the right amount for it to disappear just as quickly and nonchalantly as it came, a constant rub of his hand against his limped leg, and a novel proneness to small physical gestures: touching knees, pressing shoulders, his hand on the small of my back or idly playing with my fingers. I settle on questioning him later since I know he will not show any truths of his mind in such large company. 

We share a room, since we stopped bothering to hide our relationship long ago from the others. Henry’s already in bed, his nose buried in a book, dressed in his pyjamas, his initials embroidered upon the left side of his chest; H.M.W. If I had been told years ago that I was to be sharing a bed or be in a relationship with the person I suffered the least, the one that I had to compete with in Julian’s classes, the one that knew how to push my buttons I would have died of agony. But now I’m content. I know of the infatuation rendering me blind. My life has become a continuous torture, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to live without him. Just like Zeus who vows to fulfil his promise with a single sacred nod of his head, so am I unable to change the basis of my passion. He is in all my plans. In all the joys the future holds. In the dead of night, in Julian’s lessons, in the summer by the lake, instead of my mind’s eye being fully focused on one specific task, it always switches without fail to him.

I lower myself onto the bed next to him. “You seemed troubled earlier, in the day room.” I ask casually an indirect question.

“You’ve been spending an awful time with Richard.” He responds swiftly, tonelessly, simply pointing out a fact. 

I consider my answer for a moment. “I suppose so.” I hum, just as my head hits the pillow. “Don’t you find him intriguing? He watches the news on television.”

“Intriguing?” He blurts out, closing his book and putting it on the bedside table. Clearly, I have his attention. He turns on his side to fully face me, his hair falling over his forehead and slightly over his glasses. “His intriguing part eludes me. You are wasting your time with him, listening to his rambles.” He says clearly irritated, not bothering to keep up his stoic facade. “I assure you, you would be much better spending your time wisely.”

I frown. This is unusual of him. “He is in our class, is he not? I cannot avoid him.”

“Of course not, that’s not what I am suggesting.” His eyebrows remain furrowed. “What I do mean is that he does not bring you any benefit.” He continues in a monotone. “Why must you listen to him with the same attention and interest as you listen to me?”

Ah, I see. Henry is jealous.

“Is this jealousy?” I ask attempting desperately to restrain the slight smile forming on my face. 

“You are mistaken.” He ‘corrects’ me sharply, raising his eyebrows.  “I am merely stating that I see no point in your interactions with Richard when you could gain much more from being in my presence.”

I raise a sceptical eyebrow. He acts as if I wouldn’t mourn his death in the same way Achilles mourned Patroclus’, with rage and violence.

Words are imperfect communication devices, so I pull him down by the back of his neck and press my lips against his in a pleasant normality. I feel him slightly relax against me, his hand resting on my neck.

“Henry,” I mumble as we part, forcefully stretching our souls apart. I remove his glasses and place them down next to us and his forehead naturally falls against mine “you know better than to have such doubts.”

“I do.” He mumbles back, not bothering to deny his feelings anymore. “However, it proves to be quite difficult to not have them when-” He stops considering his words. “When you plague me so. There is no day or night in which your existence takes mercy on me and does not destroy the little rationality I have left.” He lowers himself down on the bed next to me. “You inexplicably and absurdly manage to be and eradicate my sanity.” He sighs. “And it certainly does not help when you look at Richard with the same eyes you look at me.” Henry mutters.

My hand finds his and I chuckle. “I’d argue I look at him with entirely different eyes.” At my comment, Henry raises an amused eyebrow. “Perhaps you’ll stop seeing shadows where there are none.”

That is all he needs to defeat his insomnia in my arms once again and to fall prey to sleep’s vicious grasp his body indistinguishable from mine under the sheets, sharing one breath.

[iorangehost]

Linux Hosting Cpanel

[grimrester]

sometime yesterday people on reddit figured out that the new watcher entertainment platform is not a website they have full creative control over (as implied in their video) but instead is from Vimeo OTT. this is why their new platform looks identical to dropout's. vimeo very likely just has a couple templates you pick from and they picked the same one.

this is FASCINATING to me for a few reasons:

it's not unusual for a company to obfuscate how their new web product is built out. "we're using vimeo's content paywall platform" is not nearly as impressive of a statement as "we're launching our own subscription service." this decision sometimes blows up in a company's face though. in this instance, being more candid about the process probably would have helped to mitigate the blowback, because vimeo could have been pinned by the audience as the evil scapegoat company and people wouldn't be feeling stupid when they create accounts and realize all the videos are hosted on vimeo. it also explains why they encouraged password sharing but their subs limit playing videos on more than three devices. it's just a function of the platform they don't control and didn't think about it when they said that.

i really wonder if they made this decision entirely on their own, or if vimeo has recruiters out there trying to make their platform bigger. obviously the watcher guys are responsible for this decision either way, but it sure would explain a lot about why they jumped to this solution to make more money if they had someone at vimeo pitching it to them.

how fucking funny is it that they posted a dramatic "goodbye youtube" video talking about wanting more control and wanting their own special platform just to go to youtube's direct competitor. lol

[hokusu]

#dabihawks 🍑🥞

Peach or pancake, Hawks fat ass or Hawks flat ass? The internet splits in outcry.

His fans faction off—between the bubble butt truthers and the firm pancake believers.

Is it photoshop or a trick of light? Is it an illusion, a trick of an eye? Something of a phenomenon between the internet breaking over the gold or blue of a dress?

The answer is unclear. Inexplicable. Debated, between the ages of kids on the streets comparing the bounce of their handballs to the shape of Hawks' bubble, to the grandma and grandpas across the streets, adjusting their glasses to squint and ask 'what ass?'

The forums explode. Hawks' rankings and public approval skyrockets. Is it Hawks' FLAT ass or Hawks' FAT ass?

Hawks laughs with talk show hosts, gossips with magazine columns. Cheeky grin and another line about he's certainly eaten enough pancakes to become one, that leaves the world wondering—is he serious, or is it another joke?

And Hawks will be seen flying across the city from one pancake house to another, enjoying another delectable stack.

Hawks winks in front of cameras too, a juicy ripe peach bitten through in one hand, to announce to the world that he's doing just "peachy" and the cameras will follow him as his unfold to uncover the round shape of his very own peach, as he takes off for another flight.

There are photoshoots of Hawks from all his modeling gigs paired side by side like perfectly realistic detective boards across the web. Snaps of perfectly round globes of flesh shot from high quality camera lens of those who caught a fluttering Hawks across their skies, body hunched over as he lazily passes by. And then there are modeling shoots released on myherogram, some new pair of jeans for Best Jeanist' line and he's so painfully flat from every shot of an angle, every swipe of the post—an arguably perfect flat pancake.

It's the baggy give of his hero costume, it's not Hawks' actual ass.

It's the reality of Hawks' actual ass, the costume just hurries that fact along.

'Hawks got ass. Seen it in person,' HawksPlumpAss writes. 1451 ButtLikes. 578 Rebutts.

'Hawks got no ass. Accidentally brushed past me once and didn't feel a thing. That man is flat as a board,' User AForHawksStandsForAssless writes back. 1454 ButtLikes. 524 Rebutts.

'Pics or it didn't happen,' User HawksOneTrueAss demands. 3769 ButtLikes. 1769 Rebutts.

'Top-hero. Plush ass. You'd best believe,' User HawksUnsuspectingAss writes.

'mfs out here thinking pro-hero hawks has got nothing when he's constantly flying and saving lives...YOU KNOW BIRD BOIS GOT ASS' User HawksBirdAss screams into the void. 2170 ButtLikes. 727 Rebutts.

'Who you calling bird boi like he's yours or smthg???' User HawksOneTrueAss comments. 4069 ButtLikes. 2569 Rebutts.

'listen, realistically bro has a plush ass he works out hes a top hero u kno he has the muscle. logically.' User Dove explains, politely. Beautifully, flawless. Even User HawksOneTrueAss likes the post, rebutts it for the world to see.

And then there are those who swear, upon the fan sight meetings of Hawks on the streets that they know ass when they see it. The debate takes the heroic world by a storm, and Hawks never confirms or denies the rumors, never justifies or settles the matter.

On an unsuspecting afternoon after months and months of Hawks peach vs pancake, villain Dabi dubbed user HawksOneTrueAss across the socials, snaps a shot, uploads it. Puts the discussion to rest.

The photo shows what is undeniably pro-hero Hawks' familiar golden locks, framed against the bare of his muscled back and a pair of ruby red wings. A pair of pants are slipped half way up to his thighs, undeniably plush ass hanging out and scandalously--a purple scarred hand grabs a fist full of the delectable globe, middle finger stuck out.

"Hawks true FAT Ass," User HawksOneTrueAss comments. 6969 ButtLikes. 6969 Rebutts.

The internet goes off its rails.

//

Shout-out to my friend Dove (draculpyre) on twt/bksy for the actual line in the dumbest crack I wrote and @hawks-flat-ass for the name that started this to begin with 😂💛

[artifacts-and-arthropods]

Bomber Flies: these flies launch their own eggs into the nests of wasps and bees, hovering in mid-air as they do so; the females also have a unique perivaginal pouch that is known as a "sand chamber" because it is filled with sand

Above: Anastoechus sp. (top) and Anastoechus nitidulus (bottom)

The flies of this family (Bombyliidae) are generally referred to as "bee flies," because they are known to mimic bees and bumblebees, but many of them are also known as "bomber flies," thanks to their unusual ovipository technique.

Above: a bomber fly of the genus Anastoechus

As the female bomber fly is preparing to lay her eggs, she will usually look for a soil-hidden nest that already contains the eggs/larvae of another insect. Most bomber flies lay their eggs in the nests of wasps and bees, but there are a few species that are known to target beetles, grasshoppers, locusts, other flies, and/or caterpillars, instead. Once the bomber fly has found a suitable nest, she will hover over the entrance to the burrow and rapidly flick her abdomen up and down until she has launched a single egg into the nest. She must then go searching for more nests in which to lay her other eggs.

Above: Anastoechus sp.

After hatching, the parasitoid larvae of the bomber fly feeds on the eggs/larvae of the host species (i.e. the nest's original occupants). As this article explains:

When a bee fly egg hatches, a tiny larva called a planidium emerges. The planidium is quite unlike most fly larvae (also known as maggots); they are adapted for moving quickly in search of a host. Once the planidium finds a host, it will attach itself to the host’s exterior, like a leech or sea lamprey, and begin to feed. Yes folks, this is the stuff of nightmares.

Female bomber flies also have another peculiar trait: their abdomen contains a specialized perivaginal pouch known as a "sand chamber." During the ovipository process, the fly fills this pouch with fine grains of sand, and her eggs are then coated in the sand as they pass through the perivaginal pouch. The pouch is also lined with elongated setae ("hairs") and enlarged spikes that prevent the grains of sand from spilling back out.

The overall purpose of the "sand chamber" is still unclear, but many researchers believe that coating the eggs in a layer of sand may help to improve the viability of the eggs by preventing them from being damaged as they are launched to the ground, and that it also provides them with some camouflage after they have landed. Some researchers have argued that it prevents the eggs from becoming dehydrated, because the barrier helps to improve fluid retention, while others believe that it improves the mother's aim by increasing the weight of each egg. There is some evidence to suggest that it could also prevent the eggs from being detected (and then destroyed, abandoned, or ejected) by the host species, because the sand helps to mask/mute the egg's biochemical signals.

Above: Anastoechus barbatus

Adult bomber flies tend to feed on pollen and nectar. They are excellent pollinators, and their parasitoid larvae may also help to keep wasp and bee populations in check.

This article notes that bee flies (particularly Anastoechus nitidulus) likely served as the inspiration for the Pokémon known as cutiefly:

Sources & More Info:

USGS: Bombyliidae Fly

Biological Journal of the Linnean Society: The Evolutionary Pattern of Host Use in the Bombyliidae (Diptera) Family

YouTube: Video of a Bomber Fly (Bombylius major) Selecting a Nest and then Launching her Egg into the Burrow

Smithsonian Institution Press: Bee Flies of the World (pages 6 and 27)

Michigan State University: Bee Flies

Animal Diversity Web: Genus Bombylius

Animal Diversity Web: Anthrax albofasciatus

Journal of Geek Studies: The Entomological Diversity of Pokémon