#what is life-

[sleepdeprivedsimp234]

~Sorta Louisiana-centered incorrect quotes cuz’ we love him in this household~ (also, here take a cookie) @simpyfrog

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Loui, singing to the tune of I Kissed a Girl: I killed a guy, and I liked it- 


Georgia, whispering: Should we call the exorcist? 


York, also singing: The taste of his cherry chapstick. 


Tex, appalled: Call the exorcist.

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Loui, high at a sleepover: *nudges York at 3am* Pretty f(speaks New Orleans)ed up that we depict the moon as a girl and the sun as a boy. They're just floating rocks in space. York? Wake up, York! Listen! They're sexless! 


York, trying to not knock him tf out: The sun isn't a rock, go back to sleep.

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*Tex teaching Loui to drive and taking York along for the ride* 


Tex: That's a pothole. To the left! 


Loui: Take it back now y'all *Drives into pothole* 


York, sticking their face into the front over the center console: Cha Cha real smooth. 


Loui: I don't think that's how the song goes. 


Tex, crying and gripping the handle: Please just take me home. 


Loui: Country Roads. 


York: To the place. 


Loui and York in unison: I Belong! 


Tex, crying harder: What the f(speaks Texas)?

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Mass: Who the fuck added me to a f(speaks Boston)in’ group chat? 


Utah: >:O language 


Loui: Yeah watch your f(speaks New Orleans)in’ language 


York: Okay, who taught Loui the f(speaks New York) word?! 


Florida : 'The f(speaks Miami) word'. 


Georgia: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time 


Loui: Oh my god he censored it-


Florida : Say f(speaks Miami), Georgia. 


Loui: Do it, Georgia. Say f(speaks New Orleans).

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Loui, trying his first ever cup of coffee: I am ENERGY! 


York, an avid coffee drinker, on his twelfth cup of the day: Someone slap me awake or I am literally going to fall into a coma in ten seconds.

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Tex: *makes Loui a cup of tea but puts salt in it to prank him* 


Loui: *sips tea* 


Tex: 


Loui: *finishes tea* 


Tex: Didn't it taste bad?

Loui: Yeah, but I didn't want to hurt your feelings so I drank it all. 


Tex, tearing up: Oh, okay. *under his breath* Oh you sweet sweet thing….

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Florida: What is love? 


Tex: An emotional minefield. 


York: A neurochemical reaction. 


Loui: Baby don't hurt me.

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Loui: You ever see something that changes your life and you're just like "huh.." 


Mass: I saw you. 


Loui: Honestly that's so cute and sweet but it kinda makes this awkward because I was gonna show you a picture of York t-posing over Jersey after winning a fight.

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Georgia: I give up. I am so tired. 


Florida: Get the emergency supply! 


Tex: *carries Loui and places him in front of Georgia* 


Loui: *smiles and hugs him* 


Georgia: AND I AM BACK BABY, LET’S GOOO-

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York: You ever get so tired that you start seeing spiders? 


Loui: Me after I take 17 Benadryl and start seeing the hat man. 


York: THE WHO? 


Loui: Oh is this not a safe space suddenly?

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Georgia: But what about Lou? 


Florida: Don't worry about him.


Florida: I once watched him fall down 5 flights of stairs, stand up, and keep drinking his daiquiri like nothing happened.

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Loui: I'm naturally funny because my life is a joke.

Florida and Georgia: Buddy no-

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Loui: Caffeine no longer keeps me awake while I work, so instead I have Tex periodically send me texts saying ‘we need to talk.’ 


Loui: It gives me the right amount of adrenaline and fear I need to keep going.

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*Loui and Georgia are in a car teetering on the edge of a cliff* 


Georgia: oh my god, Lou, backwards! 


Loui: Really, Geo? I thought I might go forwards into the river, I thought that would be a fun thing to do.

Georgia: Genuinely, WTF is wrong with you?!

Loui: I don’t even know anymore-

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Mass: I’m going to hell. 


Loui: Probably. 


Mass: I'll pick you up? 


Loui: *nodding* Carpool.

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Florida: Would you take a bullet for me? 


Loui: ...yes? 


*Mass angrily bursts into the room* 


Florida: *running away* Great, thanks!

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Georgia: Good morning.

Tex: Good morning. 


York: Good morning. 


Mass: Good morning. 


Florida: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit. 


Loui: MORNING MOTHERF(speaks New Orleans)ERS!

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Loui: Everything’s fine, I’m fine, Mass. 


Mass: Loui, I know your relationship with the english language is strictly casual, but you- I- *deep inhale* ALLOW ME TO TELL YOU WHAT’S NOT FINE-

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Mass: Many people are mildly dehydrated and don’t realize it. You should drink at least six glasses of water per day.

York: No, eight glasses! 


Tex: I heard ten. 


Florida: You need to drink at least five glasses of water per minute. 


*later…* 


Loui: Okay, I just read through every study I could find to try to figure out whether low-grade dehydration is even a real thing. 


Florida: What did you learn? 


Loui: If you spend all day doing research and forget to eat or drink, you start to feel pretty bad. 


Mass: I’ll get some water. 


Loui: But how many glas–whoa, feeling dizzy. *nearly falls*


Georgia: *catches him* Maybe you should just drink straight from the tap, kid.

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Loui, trying to comfort someone: What's the problem? Anxiety? Low self-esteem? Obsessive thoughts of random arson? I've been there.

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Georgia: Loui learned how to fold origami penguins from New York the other day. I told them, “I feel a little bad for the penguins, it’s hot here”, and the next day he put them in the freezer 🥹

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[maudiemoods]

If life is a never ending loop of dirty dishes and laundry then that means life is a never ending loop of home cooked meals and comfy clean clothes

[alocalfrog]

Can you imagine suing Boeing and coming home to find Boeing's faulty plane parts washed up in your backyard?

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[bethfuller]

limited perception.

find me on instagram!

[clockworkcrow]

thinking about harvey stardew valley and being a rural country doctor with a caseload like:

guy who won’t accept any diagnosis except “you have consumption and need to go to the seaside for your health”

woman who asks what gemstone he would prescribe for her UTI

guy who spends half the day trying to give himself a concussion and the other half trying to blow out his hearing on his guitar

two people who have struggled with alcoholism for years but reject all of his resources for it UNTIL someone gifts them alcohol biweekly for a year straight and suddenly their lives turn around

guy who will not stop mailing people bombs but in a friendly way and like this just isn’t on the PTSD screener??

guy who won’t stop asking him vague but increasingly bizarre questions about the safety of truffle oil

woman who EATS ROCKS

and also there’s a fucking wizard. what’s up with that. how often do you think the man goes “why did i get an MD why didn’t i just train to be a wizard i didn’t even know that was an option” while performing emergency surgery on this one farmer who won’t stop picking fights with ACTUAL MONSTERS

[wasabi-gumdrop]

local ladies man’s signature move totally useless against autistic monster enthusiast. more on Kabru’s fumble era at 6

[kn1ght-l1ght]

Posting this iconic piece of media that I just NEVER found online isolated except in an archived reddit thread

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

historical drama/sitcom where two gay best friends (woman and man) get lavender married--and proceed to spend the Fancy European Honeymoon their parents paid for acting as each other's wingman

[christadeguchi]

(✿◕‿◕) die (ꈍ ꒳ ꈍ✿)

[bruhstation]

you’re just like the rest of them

[annabelle--cane]

I am aware I have died on this hill before but people who really strenuously argue that fanfic isn't "real writing" drive me insane. what do you meeeaaaaannn. besides the fact that any attempt to define "real art" vs "fake art" is inherently reactionary, it just doesn't make any sense. it's Writing. people Write it. what the fuck are you talking about.

[wanologic]

sorry danny, sam will never think you’re cool

[daisywords]

One of my biggest nitpicks in fiction concerns the feeding of babies. Mothers dying during/shortly after childbirth or the baby being separated form the mother shortly after birth is pretty common in fiction. It is/was also common enough in real life, which is why I think a lot of writers/readers don't think too hard about this. however. Historically, the only reason the vast majority of babies survived being separated from their mother was because there was at least one other woman around to breastfeed them. Before modern formula, yes, people did use other substitutes, but they were rarely, if ever, nutritionally sufficient.

Newborns can't eat adult food. They can't really survive on animal milk. If your story takes place in a world before/without formula, a baby separated from its mother is going to either be nursed by someone else, or starve.

It doesn't have to be a huge plot point, but idk at least don't explicitly describe the situation as excluding the possibility of a wetnurse. "The father or the great grandmother or the neighbor man or the older sibling took and raised the baby completely alone in a cave for a year." Nope. That baby is dead I'm sorry. "The baby was kidnapped shortly after birth by a wizard and hidden away in a secret tower" um quick question was the wizard lactating? "The mother refused to see or touch her child after birth so the baby was left to the care of the ailing grandfather" the grandfather who made the necessary arrangements with women in the neighborhood, right? right? OR THAT GREAT OFFENDER "A newborn baby was left on the doorstep and they brought it in and took care of it no issues" What Are You Going to Feed That Baby. Hello?

Like. It's not impossible, but arrangements are going to have to be made. There are some logistics.

[kvothes]

poetry and musical theater get similar accusations leveled at them in terms of not being realistic, i.e. “no one fucking talks like that” or “people don’t randomly burst into song in real life” and sometimes i just want to take people by the shoulders and say. there are forms of art that are not aiming for perfect realism. are you capable of handling that

[everwalldigan]

My favourite thing ever is when Jason is drawn to resemble Bruce because I KNOWW his ass would HATE it😭😭

Dick: hey Jason you haven’t forgotten our meet u— oh my god are you ok?? What happened?

Jason *rocking back and forth on the floor with a traumatised look in his eyes, whispering in horror* someone mistook me for Bruce in the grocery store today.

Random kid at a charity event pointing at Jason standing grumpily in a corner: who’s that?

Bruce (smiling fondly): that’s my son Jason!

Random kid: he looks like you! :D

Jason: *leaves the room*

Bruce (running after him): jason, Jason they didn’t mean anything by it, Jason, you’re going to jump off a balcony just because of a child’s observation Jason?