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#where time never passes and you will never decay.
gloopdimension · 1 year
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im so Made
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sweet-as-an-angel · 11 months
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Zombie! Ghost NSFW Headcanons
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Warnings: 18+, Zombie Fucking, Monster Fucking, Zombie! Ghost, Human! Reader, Zombie Anatomy, Cockwarming, Unprotected Sex, Stagnant Semen, Stomach Bulge, Stomach Swelling, Mention of Breeding, Engorged Penis, Brief Worry of Infection, Mentions of Blood, No Pronouns Used For Reader Except ‘You’.
Zombie!Ghost who’s been travelling with you for the last couple of months or so.
Zombie! Ghost who wasn’t like all the other infected — he retained most of his autonomy with only his body succumbing to the disease, blood smattered down his tactical gear, eyes milky.
Zombie!Ghost who, though he can’t speak, can still communicate via growls, gurgles and groans, as well as body language, albeit in a stiff manner.
Zombie!Ghost who, despite existing in a decaying body, has retained most of his human, primal urges. Even had some of them enhanced.
Zombie!Ghost who, though you might not know it, rocks himself into his hand when the night is quiet, your name and face on his mind amidst the buzz of the virus telling him to act on his base instincts to eat, feed and breed.
Zombie!Ghost who sees that, much to his lethargic delight, this was the case for you, too.
On many a night had he caught you with something hard between your legs, trying desperately to alleviate the the knots below your stomach.
Zombie!Ghost who, one night, after a long day of running from the undead and hiding in an enclosed space with you, chest to chest as you both waited for the horde to pass, found that palming himself did nothing to rid him of the aching feeling between his legs.
Zombie!Ghost who can sense that you’re the same: all that excess adrenaline and pent-up sexual frustration permeated the air with scent only a creature like Ghost could smell. A scent which he followed to the door of your room.
He knocked. Once. Heard you shuffling, scurrying, before clearing your throat, telling him to “Come in,”
Zombie! Ghost who can see your hasty attempt to cover yourself, your pants pulled up with such speed that you’d neglected to zip them back up, the hem of your underwear showing between the open space.
Zombie!Ghost who sees your eyes flicker to his trousers, widen slightly, before returning to his eyes.
Zombie!Ghost who wastes no time, kicking the door shut behind him and taking heavy, deliberate steps towards you.
Zombie! Ghost whose hand slithers down his front to the bulge between his legs, never taking his eyes off yours as he squeezes it, letting out a guttural groan.
Zombie! Ghost who knows you’re intelligent enough to pick up what he’s putting down. Even if you are stunned into momentary silence.
Zombie! Ghost who feels something in him grow warm when you look up at him with wide eyes, asking him, tentatively: “But…won’t I get infected?”
Zombie! Ghost who shakes his head, for he can do little more to put your mind at ease save for leaving and never proposing such a thing again.
Zombie! Ghost who sees you mulling it over in your mind, though he can tell by the rampant heat coming from between your thighs, the tantalising scent of your hormones thickening in the air, that your mind is already made up.
Zombie! Ghost who approaches with a rabid look in his eyes, coming to stand right where you need him.
Zombie! Ghost who has to bite back a growl when he feels your fingers brush him through his clothes, taking the zipper of his pants between your fingers and pulling it down.
Zombie! Ghost who, after having himself freed of his tactical gear, lies back on the bed, watching your mouth drop open as you see his swollen, drooling, stiffened cock for the first time, blackened veins running up the shaft. Pulsating. Something viscous and almost white oozes from the tip.
Zombie! Ghost who has to resist the urge to buck his hips when you come to straddle him, your pants and underwear abandoned somewhere on the mattress.
Zombie! Ghost who shudders when his tip meets your heat, the first semblance of warmth he’s felt since his un-death.
Zombie! Ghost who, even with his vocal cords having thoroughly decayed, lets out a carnal growl as you take him, sinking down onto his tip and wincing at the coldness — the size — of him.
Zombie! Ghost who can only wait for you to adjust to his girth and his lack of temperature as you sink further, a bulge in your stomach forming.
Zombie! Ghost who can feel you squeezing around him, already coaxing him to forfeit his restraint and pump you full of the stagnant semen all but bursting from his engorged ballsack. The consequence of not having an outlet for weeks.
Zombie! Ghost who gasps, back arching against the mattress, his gloved bands coming to grip your waist while he grinds up into you, desperate to feel more of your warmth.
Zombie! Ghost who can barely hold it together (literally) as you rock yourself on his cock, whimpering and gasping as he fills every ounce of space your body can give him.
Zombie! Ghost who can see that this is the turning point for your relationship — that the two of you have entered something you wouldn’t be able to explain to others even if you wanted to. If there was anyone left to explain it to.
Zombie! Ghost who, the longer and harder you rock against him, lifting yourself and dropping again back onto him, feels himself start to come undone, starts to feel the all-too human tremours and electricity — the tell-tale signs of a release.
Zombie! Ghost who, when he sees you try to pull away, try to stop him from splattering your insides with his seed, tightens his grip on your waist, keeping you flush against him.
Zombie! Ghost who, despite his lethargy, bucks up into you. Despite your protests, your begging for him to “Pull out — please!” knows it’s far too late as his eyes squeeze shut and his body spasms.
You’re filled with a wet coldness that can’t possibly be mistaken for anything else. And what’s more, there’s tons of it. You’re sure the sheer amount of semen Ghost is pumping you full of is going to leave your stomach swollen for days to come.
Zombie! Ghost who bounces you on his dick until he feels you cum, hears you cry out, sees you go limp, his hands keeping you upright.
Zombie! Ghost who, in the panting, sweating, sweltering aftermath, lays you beside him, his cock still deep inside you, a parasite in its own right as it sought and fed from your warmth.
Zombie! Ghost who brings an arm around you, pulling your back to his front, his face in your hair.
Zombie! Ghost who, tiring now, wonders if you’d have been together like this when he was a human, when he was alive.
Zombie! Ghost who wonders how he’s managed to live without you in the first place. Who knows now he’ll do anything to make sure that never happens.
Zombie! Ghost who can feel that you’ve fallen into a deep slumber, your breathing steady.
Zombie! Ghost who wonders how much of his strength, his load, you can take — where and when you’ll get yourself off on him next.
Reblog for more content like this! It helps creators like myself tremendously and it is greatly appreciated :-)
Masterlist Masterlist [Continued] Masterpost Modern Warfare AI Masterlist
AO3 Wattpad
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silvergarnet12 · 1 year
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What if you could find the Divine Beasts in the Depths?
You’re in this dark, alien environment, strange noises echoing around you, the inescapable anxiety your only companion. Squinting in the distance, you see a frighteningly familiar shade of blue flicker, faint in the distance.
Cautiously moving forward, you begin to realise the blue belongs to something much, much larger than a possible guardian. Eventually, an ancient behemoth looms overhead, still, silent, and empty, both at rest and unnervingly calm. A strange, restless melancholy replaces the sense of creeping dread, no less uneasy than before.
Entering the resting stone, in the corner of your eyes, you see movement flicker. At first you think a spirit, perhaps the Champions still linger… but deep down you know they’ve passed on… right?
Echoing footsteps fill the silence as you press on, avoiding gloom where there had once been malice, a desecration of a sacred resting place. You see the flicker again, turn on your foot and see for a split second, a beloved friend, an uneasy rival, a stalwart protector, a steadfast leader, an ally, a painful reminder of your worst failure. Even now, years later, it stings.
You try to get their attention, but there is no response. Instead, you watch. And realise. And mourn again. There are no spirits here. Not in the vast, decaying depths, not in the final resting places of a final hope.
These are echoes of the ones you knew. You can see them in the corner of your eyes sometimes, going about preparations for that ill-fated battle. It’s eerie, made no better by the Grand Poes gently swaying, their locations random but making uncomfortable sense.
Sometimes, on unlucky days, it is not preparations that these echoes go through. Pain torn screams faintly heard as their final moments are played out, a play on an eerie stage.
Vah Medoh groans in the dark, as the image of her pilot slams limply on her back, wing torn, and struggles to get up, defiance in his glare even now.
Vah Ruta cries a warning, as her pilot slumps over the controls, never seeing her killer, her last thought to warn the others.
Vah Rudania braces herself, as the echo of her pilot does the same, but the shield shatters, a flash of phantom heat coating the area, followed by darkness.
Vah Nabooris strides steady, until her pilot, fatigued from a relentless assualt, makes one fatal misstep in her final dance, lightning crackling in the air.
The stone beasts are restless, aware of the new threat, and unable to let go of the last pilots they’ll ever have, desperately trying to fight once more. But instead, they lay still, silent, a monument to their pilots lost to time.
What if you could find the Divine Beasts in the Depths?
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sun-snatcher · 1 month
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Wish. If u give me a Part 2 of your Gambit fic with ❛ we'll just have to make do.  ❜ where they both make it out of the Void together I will kiss u on the mouth rn I PROMISE u. Or a hug. Whichever works. PLS I JUST NEED TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS TO THEM🙏🏼😫
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♧ ⎯ ‘LIMBO LOSERS’ CLUB
summ. The TVA extends an olive branch. Wade’s Universe becomes home. Above all, you’re just thankful you’re not alone in this Multiversal mess. pairing. Void!Gambit x f!Anomaly!reader (established in #WELUCKYFEW) w.count. 1.6k a/n. Shirtless Channing + romantic hand tension. That's it. That's the tweet. ( Continuation of this imagine! )
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YOU SURVIVE ALIOTH.
That’s the first surprise.
The second? 
The Time Variance Authority want to help, now. 
( Granted, it’d mostly been Wade who did the gruntwork of sending Elektra and Blade back to their Universes, but he had hit a wall when it came to you and Gambit considering you two were— according to him: “A coked up version of being homeless. Universe-less.” )
So here you are, a stray of the Multiverse, standing on the platform of a mid-century aestheticised monitor room somewhere outside the constraints of time, trying not to double over from the vertiginous aftermath of being thrown through Wade’s weird orange warbling door of space. 
TemPad, he’d called the device. Or… something. You’re half-sure you have a concussion, to be honest.
Alioth had done a number on you. 
Remy’s concerned.
“Here’s what I don’t understand,” Wade says, mask rolled up to his nose. (There’s a spoon and plate of key lime pie in his hands. You’re not even sure where he got it from.) “Where did Gambit come from? How come he just spawned into the MCU’s metaphysical Backrooms?”
“Candidly, he is a unique case.” 
Remy pulls his gaze from you to Hunter B-15.
“You, Mr. LeBeau, are the prime example of a Variant that’s borne from a timeline decaying just as quickly as it was formed. A rare type that fades instantly without unnatural interference, because an Anchor failed to develop.”
One of the CRT screens zip to a retro rubber-hose animated diagram: rapidly branching roots, ominous red flashing, and then an immediate blink into nothing. Talk about dramatic effect.
“Your Universe falls in the rare category of those that never managed to come into fruition; but sometimes— incredibly rarely— remnants just like you manage to slip through, and instead of ceasing to exist… Well, you automatically end up getting spit into the Void.”
A pause.
Then, from behind, Wade bursts into a cackle.
“Ha! Wow, she basically called you a discontinued fucking nobody,” he wheezes. “You’re quite literally the equivalent of a failed movie pitch that’s been forgotten on the floor of Feige’s writers’ room.”
Screens flicker. 
Your breath hitches. 
Versions of different Gambit’s play out in the monitor-wall, all alike and yet different in their individual realities. Some have black eyes. Some have top-hats (“Ah, that’s 2009 Origins,” Wade muses. “Do all Variants of you just have a beautiful face? I mean, it’s kinda unfair—”). 
Some look like identical copies.
[EARTH-TRN2922].
It’s… your timeline. 
Your friends in the Mutant war. Your Remy whose cards are scattered on the floor, blood in his hands, with you crumbling as you reach ou—
The Nine of Hearts in your pocket is impossibly heavy. You turn away to steel yourself. 
( “Yeah, okay, enough lore recap. Jesus, you guys are more of a dick than I am; Read the room and turn that shit off,” Wade chides a passing agent. He gets it. He’d lost Vanessa once, too, and he’s not quite sure even he can relive that pain. )
“Mais non, y’not makin’ no sense t’me,” Remy says, confused, “I’ve got memories; means I’ve got history jus’ like my Variants. How y’gon’ explain that?”
“Gaps of memories you have— knowledge of places, people, events— that comes from fixed synchronicities shared in your Temporal Aura across all your Multiversal Variants.” 
She’s met with slow, owlish blinks. Wade waves his hand in lazy dismissal.
“Forgive them. They didn’t watch Loki Season One or Two. Not that it matters, anyway. People barely understood what was going on.”
A sigh. “There’s no way to put this gently, Mr LeBeau,” B-15 concludes, tone dipping into something sympathetic. “But what I’m trying to say is that: you don’t have a Universe to go back to, because it never existed.”
She purses her lips as she catches his torn gaze. “I’m sorry.”
And that— That pisses you off.
“I’m… sorry?” you parrot, stepping forward. “That’s all you can say after everything that’s happened to us? His existence began with the Void, and my Universe was pruned by your agents. Innocent lives gone because your people decided they wanted to play God once upon a damn time—!” 
“Pump the hate breaks, you stray,” Wade calls. "Why'd you think I brought the both of you here?"
You reluctantly withdraw.
“I can’t bring you home,” B-15 supplies, matter-of-fact. “But I can find a compatible timeline for you. For both of you. A safe do-over, if you will.”
Wade’s smile is coy.
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The ‘Merc with a mouth’ has a home surprisingly… cozy.
Albeit a little tumbledown and messy with its wallpaper-torn brick walls and creaking hardwood floors— but, it’s charming. Lived in. He has a life here in this rickety two-bedroom apartment; framed photographs of friends and snatches of livelihood sit across dressers and are pasted against his magnet-crowded refrigerator.
Reminds you abit of your home, too.
“Listen,” chirps Wade’s voice, somewhere down the short hall to his room. “My advice? Save yourself the identity crisis and brain aneurysm. All this multiversal horse-crap was created just so that Marvel can write themselves out of any corner. Just sit there and be sexy for the readers, okay, Magic Mike?”
You’re halfway towards them when the doorbell rings. 
“Ooh! That must be the pizza I ordered. Or Blind Al. Or Logan.” Wade pops out to sidle past you with a wink and a whispered: “Who knows, really? This is just the part of the story where I conveniently disappear so you and Cajun Tatum here can share a moment.”
You don’t quite understand— but you’ve learned to not bother attempting when it comes to him.
Your knock is soft against the doorframe. 
“Hey.”
Beside a lone corner of the bed, Remy turns to look over his shoulder. 
He’s fresh out the shower— faded towel tied around his waist, brown hair still damp and dripping water down his bare chest. His old clothes have been draped over a desk chair. 
You try not to stare, but—
But. 
He’s handsome. Devilishly so, with the bruises sweeping across the flex of all his stupidly lean, corded muscles.
You always had a thing for roguish-looking men.
“Hi,” he says, knowingly. ( It’s a dulcet croon, if anything. Cheeky bastard. ) “Y’okay? Got y’self cleaned up.”
Remy watches you gather yourself with a quick clear of your throat, pull at the sleeves of the scratchy hoodie you’re now wearing that’s practically swallowing you whole. 
You look rested. At ease. 
…Pretty.
“Yeah. Showered. We don’t smell like ass anymore, that’s for sure,” you say, making a face.
And then you’re nodding over to the black-and-blue contusions blooming over his skin. “You know, I’m sure there’s something frozen in the icebox for that.”
“Icebox?” 
You smile. “Yeah, that’s what you guys call it in Louisiana, right?”
“That we do, chèr,” he laughs. But it’s ducked down, quiet. Thin. “ ‘Least, I think so.”
You follow his downcast eyes to a small stack of folders— TVA files he easily thieved (unsurprisingly) from under their noses the moment he stepped foot into the room. 
He’d skimmed the manila dossiers: Absolute Points. Anchor Beings. Variant Anomalies. Some names he’d recognised and some he didn’t, most stamped or blacklisted. 
Pietro Maximoff. Edward Brock. Loki Laufeyson. 
Remy LeBeau.
Some part of you crumples. It’s one thing to not be able to return to a Universe, and another to not have even had one. 
“S’funny,” he chuckles dryly, picking his casefile up with a distant look, “My memories… I thought I’d done gon’ left a whole life behind me the entire time I been stuck in the Void— Friends. Family. An’ turns out the Void’s all I had.”
“Feels like…” he shrugs. Tries to piece his unmoored thoughts into something more cohesive. He’s never felt so horrifically adrift his entire life— whatever ‘entire life’ could mean for him now, anyway— not even when he'd been marooned in the barren wastelands of the Void.
 “Feels like I ain’t real. Hell, I don’t know what is real, anymore, chèr. I don’t— I just don’t know. I don't know anythin'."
You shake your head in disagreement nigh instantly. 
“No, no.” Pushing off the doorway, you cross the threshold with gentle admonishment lanced over your features. “You’re here. You are real.” 
The room is small. The distance you share is… close. Just enough that you catch the scent of peppermint toothpaste and coconut shampoo; Just enough that you can slide the documents out of his hands.
His fingers brush against yours. 
He wonders if you’d felt the kinetic trill of energy run through him at the contact.
“Can I be honest, Remy?”
You look up at him. 
“Mais oui, chèr. Y’can always be honest wit’ Gambit.”
You wave your hand at the TVA files. “I’m scared as shit being in a new Universe,” you blurt, truthfully. “This second chance means… a new life. New path. New everything. I don’t know what that’s like either and frankly, I am not prepared for this at all.”
You pause for a breath. “But for what it’s worth? I’m glad that you’re here. That’s… That’s about the only thing that I know.”
Then, as if dwarfed by the sheer vulnerability in your words, you take an awkward step back as you shrug. “And if you don’t feel the same, well. You and I, we’ll just have to make do, regardless.”
The sudden retreat is painfully endearing. Has him letting out a bright laugh that warms something nestled deep in your ribs.
“I’m glad I got you too, chèr,” he grins. 
“Yeah?” You flash a smile, having found your way back to the door.
Remy’s eyes fall to your face— tarrying. He follows the flutter of your lashes, the slope of your cheek, the curl of your lips. 
“…Yeah.”
Your idling, fond gaze sears him like a low-grade fever. 
The thrum buzzes in hands, again.
Your Gambit really was blind, he thinks, just as you slip away and disappear around the corner.
His palm flexes open, and shut.
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nova2kss · 2 months
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No chill
Plug!Connie x black reader
Ever since you and Connie first had sex, he’s had NO chill.Connie didn’t necessarily do anything for you to block him, he only gave you the best dick and aftercare of your life and damn near had you in love with him.
That’s why he absolutely HAD to be blocked otherwise you would’ve probably be impregnated with his seed right now! Per your request.
You knew Connie had been trying to get in contact with you from the various text now numbers that have swarmed your phone since the morning he woke up expecting to see you on his bed side, only for him to wake up to you long gone with no way of contacting you.
His first instinct that morning was to text your mutual friend Sasha and figure out what the fuck was going on, there was absolutely no way in hell you were about to give him some heavenly pussy and then block him on everything including TikTok.
Connie had to find a way to see you and if you weren’t going to face him like the grown woman you claim you are he would have to come up with a way to make you see him.
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You sprayed your face with the urban decay all nighter setting spray, the night you were about to have with your friends Sasha and Mikasa you needed your makeup on all damn night!
Just finished flat ironing that all black 30 inch buss down, applying gloss, and blinking the FUCK out your mink eyelashes, you felt unstoppable right now.
The outfit you wore was basic, but the face made up for it, besides according to Sasha she was just throwing a small kickback with a few familiar friends EXCLUDING Connie.
You had to make sure the excluding Connie was very much mentioned when she pitched the idea, and she promised you that he wouldn’t be there even tho she had no idea why you don’t want him around you anyway.
You couldn’t tell her cause it would be far to embarrassing to say “I can’t be around him because the dick is toooo good and I’m gonna become an obsessed dickmatized slut if I keep talking to him”
Not that it was any of their business anyway.
As you were getting lost in your thoughts you got a text from your group chat
“Y/nnnnn we’re outsideeee”
Getting up so excitedly after not being out the house for so long, it felt nice to finally get out the house and even it was for just for a few moments.
Walking out of your apartment doors you spot Sasha’s blacked out kia k5, sash in the passenger since Mika didn’t drink she would’ve been the designated driver.
Hopping in the car happy as fuck! To see your girls after a long time, when you got in reaching up to the front to give them hugs you noticed the opened Don Julio and Hennessy bottles sitting under Sasha feet.
“Damn bitch you started without me?”laughing as she was already bending down to pass you one of the bottles
“I’m sorry pookie I couldn’t wait, you know I wasn’t gone leave you hanging tho” sash responded laughing obviously tipsy
Taking your sip twisting your face as the burning sensation hit the back of your throat, it was never a feeling you could get used to.
The effects you loved tho.
Mikasa driving while west district by party next door played had you zoned out and before you knew it you were outside of Sasha’s big ass house
Multiple cars parked around the block, and at this point you were confused cause it was supposed to be a small kick back??
“Umm Sasha this is a big ass party” you could literally even see people splashing around in the pool.
“It was supposed to fucking be” she said visibly upset
She seemed to have sobered up seeing all these people here, it was evident that she didn’t know all these people were gonna be here.
She immediately got up and stormed inside looking to see where would yall friend group be since somebody in there had to be the culprit that told one to many mofucking people, and of course you and Mika stormed right behind her cause who was running they mouth like that.
as soon as y’all spotted yall group you all stormed over there
Until you spotted a familiar face that had you stopping in your tracks.
Upon Sasha running up to the corner the resided in heads turned toward her, seeing Sasha Connie instantly turned his head past her looking for you.
And he seen you, frozen and confused, his eyes seemed to have darken looking at you, and you didn’t know what thoughts ran through his head you just know they weren’t good ones.
Slipping past an upset Sasha making his way towards you his brown eyes locked on yours.
You don’t know why you didn’t move, walk away, or just leave.
Part of you wanted to see him yes possibly for an apology maybe but the other part really didn’t, I mean there was a reason you blocked him right?
His hand touched yours bringing you out of your thoughts, you weren’t scared just confused because why is he not mad at you?
“Hi..?” The tone of confusion is very evident on your voice
Connie didn’t respond with words, instead he quickly wrapped his hand around your neck bringing you face to face.
“Why’d you block me y/n”
You were to stunned and turned on to speak, his grip tightened around your neck making you whimper and close your eyes
“You don’t wanna speak baby? Mhm k” he let go of your neck and grabbed your hand leading you to the steps of the home
The butterflies in your stomach were going crazy as You could only imagine what he was about to do to you.
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“Mmph mmphhhhh”
The squelching as Connie fucking your throat was absolutely disgusting.
His hands resided on the sides of your face roughly thrusting into your mouth as you sat in front of him on your knees, spit dripping down his shaft and down your chin.
“Ouuu fuck ma” Connie hisses
“You don’t wanna tell me why? Ima just have to fuck it out of you baby”
He gripped your hair, pulling you away from his dick, gasping for air as you came up.
With one hand on your hair and the other resting below your chin he looked down at you
“Open your mouth” complying with no further complaints Connie spat directly on to your tongue not letting you swallow before sticking his fingers down your mouth.
Pushing you backward onto the bed he sat on his knees, grabbing your thighs before licking a long stripe up to your clit.
The moan you let out was audible, your skirt still on thong to the side as Connie constantly lapped up on your juices.
The fingers that were previously in your mouth began to rub ferociously at your clit while he tongue fucked you.
You Tried to push his head away, an unsuccessful attempt to get away from the brutal pleasure you were receiving
It was all to much
“Co-con pleaseee, oh myyy FUCKKK”
The orgasm washed over you quicker than you anticipated it to.
Your juices rushing out against his face as he desperately tried to suck up every last drop, while rubbing against your clit with his four fingers.
It was all to much and you felt like you seriously couldn’t take it, not when even after you squirted all on his face he still was licking your soaked slit.
“Mmphhh”, his long arms wrapped around your thighs as you tried to run as he kept his face nuzzled into your pussy.
“Stop trynna run from me mama” his arms had your legs on lock you couldn’t move
“He gave your sensitive bud one last lick before he came up gripping your neck pulling you in for the sloppiest kiss.
“Vas a decirme por qué me bloqueaste, incluso si tengo que joderte, bebé”
You had no idea what he just said, but to be honest you don’t really care with the way he had your ankles resting on his shoulders, just watching him stroke his thick veiny shaft.
His reddened tip had pre cum leaking out of it
He took his thumb and wiped some of it sticking his thumb in your mouth making you moan at the salty taste
“You so wet for me mama” he moaned sliding his tip up your slit
The gasp you both let out as he slipped inside of you was universal
He laid his head by yours as you wrapped your legs and arms around
Moaning at the feeling of his thick cock stretching out your warm walls
The feeling was so so good it had you moaning at the thought of just getting fucked by him.
“Connie m-move please baby”
He followed your command slowly pushing more in groaning slightly
“You want me to fuck you baby?”
“Mhm hmmm” you answered so quickly shaking your head
“No y/n I told you this last time” he said grabbing your chin lightly slapping your face “do you want me to fuck you?” The whine you let out was so desperate.
He was so sexy being this dominant
“Yes Connie please fuck me”
His thrust sped up immediately
Your neck was his hands resting place as he fucked into you
You felt so good right now his moans in sync with yours
In fact everything was in sync
The rhythm of everything matched together perfect like a puzzle piece
His hot heavy breathing in your air had you feral
“Oh my fu… Connie you’re so deeppp”
You swear you felt him in your brainnnnn, this is why you couldn’t keep talking to this man he was hitting it so right.
“Where you feel me at baby”
You couldn’t respond, not with the way he was fucking on you
“Y/n talk to me” he wanted you to speak cause he had a lot of things to question you about.
“Con I can’t” you cried out, eyes shut legs shaking, and your orgasm nearing
“Oh yes you can mama, if You can tell me you can’t you can tell me where you feel this dick y/n”
You moaned, he was talking to you so nasty and you loved it
“I feel it baby” you whined in response
“right here” your hand lightly rested on the bottom of your stomach
His hand reach down pressing onto your lower abdomen making your mouth form an O shape
“Oh shit connieee fuck”
“Mhmm I know mami, I know”
The pressure, combined with his slow sloppy strokes had you about to come.
“Connie I’m gonna cum, oh fuck I’m gonna cum”
The words were rushing out of your mouth quicker than you can think.
“Cum for me baby, cum on this dick baby”
And that you did with a long drawn out moan you were squirting and creaming all over his throbbing dick.
“Oh fuck ma” his thrust were slowing down trying not to nut with you
“Intentas volverme loco en este coño y dejarte embarazada, ¿eh?”
He pulled out slowly rubbing against your slit
“Turn around and get on all fours”
“Connie.” You puffed out of breath
“Nah turn around, you still gotta tell me why you blocked me mama.”
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AHHHH I need him so bad
Did y’all like it? And as always not proof read
The first ep of influencer island is coming….once I start writing it 🙂‍↕️
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fragilefable · 9 months
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nobody's son, nobody's daughter.
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Pairing: Joel Miller x Fem!Reader Rating: Mature (18+ minors DNI) Summary: When you and Joel get separated the night of the outbreak, you spend the next decade searching for him. Just when you've given up— a miracle occurs. Warnings: heavy angst, canon typical violence, character death (sarah), discussions of grief, very brief mention of suicidal ideation, alcohol used to cope, depression, suggestive language, lovers reunited, hurt/comfort, happy ending.
Word Count: 6.6k Currently Playing: Chemtrails Over the Country Club by Lana Del Rey ♪
A/N: This piece has been months in the making, hours of rereading and rewriting. This is my love child. I'm possibly (definitely) planning a part 2 with smut... ;) I am a full-time college student who unfortunately has other responsibilities, so please be patient with me. My first lengthy piece in a while, so please be kind & enjoy my doves!
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Sleep was the most convenient temporary escape available in the post-cordyceps world. Oftentimes, if you were lucky enough, with sleep came dreams—glimpses of a divine, utopian life. One without spores or fungi of any kind. There was, however, always the chance that with it came nightmares—Polaroids of the past, the uprising of the infection. Mothers clutching bloodied children, decaying men ripping open flesh with their savage teeth, and, worst of all— losing Joel Miller. 
Joel was... everything—neighbor, friend, lover. Joel hated that word— laughed every time it managed to escape your lips in a hushed whisper, but that was what you were to each other. It transcended explanation. You'd moved to Austin after college in hopes of starting over, a clean slate. Instead, you'd stumbled upon a single father and his then 11-year-old daughter. You fit into their life like the missing puzzle piece— you completed them. Sarah needed a motherly presence in her life. There was only so much Joel could do for the blossoming young woman. 
And Joel— Joel never knew what he was missing until you came along. Someone to be able to rely on, to love unconditionally, a fixed constant. To say he fell head over heels was an understatement, but it became so much more than physical attraction. It became something far more profound and terrifying— love. The kind of love only poets write about. It was fierce, at times agonizing. That's what made losing him all the more heartbreaking. 
You were with Sarah the night of the outbreak— Joel's birthday. Lounging around in plaid pajamas, waiting for Joel to get home from work. Despite being exhausted, Sarah was beaming with pride over her birthday present for her dad— his broken wristwatch now repaired and refurbished. You smiled mischievously, "And just where did you get the money to fix this, young lady?" Sarah grinned slyly, "Just lyin' around, it's not like he noticed it was missin'!" Hours passed, you and Sarah slumped against the couch: Fast asleep, soft snores escaping mouths, drool dribbling down chins. 
The sight made Joel's heart quaver in his chest. Kicking off his muddied work boots, he carefully plopped down in between the two sleeping figures, planting a gentle kiss on the crown of your head. "Hmm. You're home," you stirred awake, drowsy eyes met with a welcome sight: Weathered tan skin and dark chocolate curls. "Hey, Darlin'. You outta head up to bed. I'll be up soon." You nodded faintly, planting a chaste kiss on Sarah's forehead: "Goodnight, sweet girl." 
You fell fast asleep as soon as your body hit Joel's mattress, his scent engulfing you like a blanket of safety— a shield of sorts. The vague smell of sawdust and pine soap conquered your senses, a heavenly combination. An hour later, you felt the bed dip down, strong arms circling your waist.
Frantic hands shook you awake, calling your name weakly: "I can't find Dad. N' somethin' weird is goin' on outside." You sat up, Sarah's urgency pulling you from your hazy half-asleep state. "Don't worry, sweetheart, I'll call him. Go back to bed." Sarah ignored your suggestion and sat beside you as you reached for the landline. The call went to voicemail without hesitation: "Huh... That's weird." 
Sarah grew more anxious by the second, "I'm gonna go check the driveway for his truck." Sarah shot up from the bed, feet pattering down the stairs. "Sarah! Wait, I'll come with-" Throwing on your Converse, you hastily ran out after her. Your tired eyes scanned the pavement but found no signs of Sarah or Joel's truck. The Adler's door was wide open; you huffed: "Sarah?" 
The Adler's house was pitch black and eerily quiet, the family's dog nowhere to be seen: "Sarah? This is trespassing!" Tiptoeing through the living room, you halted at the sight of a ruby trail— blood. Grotesque, wet noises filled the previously silent house: "Sarah?" The teen bolted out of the kitchen, grabbing your hand and pulling you towards the front door: "Run!" Mrs. Adler scrambled after Sarah, mouth dribbling crimson liquid, no longer bound to her wheelchair. 
"What the fuck–" Sarah's grip on your hand tightened as you passed through the door and stumbled onto the pavement. A pair of familiar brown eyes scanned Sarah's figure and then yours: "Sarah? Darlin'? Are ya'll ok-" Joel's words were cut off when Mrs. Adler dashed through the front door, her figure lunging for you. 
Joel struck the side of her head with a wrench as you made a feeble attempt to crawl away. His strikes were lethal, and yet the elder kept thrashing against the ground. "Joel, stop!" Only then did you notice Tommy, Joel's younger brother, behind you, coaxing Sarah into the truck. 
Joel exhausted Mrs. Adler with one final swing, dropping the bloodied wrench beside him and wiping his shaky hands on his jeans. His gaze softened when he saw your timid frame— shaking and unmoving. "Darlin'... Baby, are you okay?" His hands found your shoulders, rubbing soothing circles on a patch of exposed skin. You hesitated; Joel had just killed Mrs. Adler in cold blood— but she tried to kill you and Sarah first. 
Joel hurriedly hoisted you to your feet, "We gotta go, okay baby? It's not safe here." You clambered into the backseat beside Sarah, the girl's arms thrown around you tightly. Kissing the crown of her head, you reassured her: "It's okay, sweetheart, everything's okay." 
Neighbors began to exit their homes, baffled and disturbed by the sight of Mrs. Adler's bloody, lifeless body lying in the yard. Someone called out for Joel. He immediately instructed her to go back inside and lock the doors. Tommy beckoned Joel into the car, exiting the culdesac and taking off towards the highway. After a fleeting moment, you mustered up the courage to ask, "Joel, what's going on?" Tommy replied, "They're sayin' it's a virus- some kinda parasite." Sarah spoke up, tears forming, "Are we sick?" Joel shot the idea down immediately. 
Tommy and Joel continued bickering, your eyes glued to the road ahead: "Joel! Look- It's Jimmy's place." The two-story farmhouse was completely engulfed in flames, unrecognizable. Your hands clung to Sarah, burrowing her head into your neck: "It's okay, sweet girl." Police sirens rang out through the darkness, interrupted by soft pleas for help. A family was stranded on the side of the road, begging for aid. Tommy began to slow the car. "What're you doin'?" Joel firmly questioned. Tommy shot back, "Got a kid, Joel." 
"So do we. Keep drivin'," Joel spat. Tommy sped back up, eyes searching Joel's for an explanation: "Somebody else will come along." As Tommy approached the interstate, the sounds of disgruntled drivers grew louder: "Fuck! Everybody had the same fuckin' idea. I can't get through this." Joel gripped the dashboard, "All right, all right. Let's think it through," he paused for a moment, "All right, take the field! We cut across, and we pick up on the west side." Tommy steered right, the truck jerking on the uneven terrain. As he drove over the hill, helicopters and tanks came into view, "Shit. Fuckin' army." 
Sarah peered out from behind the seat, "Isn't that good?" Your voice was filled with hesitation, "That's the highway we need to get to." Joel and Tommy argued, eventually continuing toward a town just east of the highway. Sarah stilled, "Maybe it's everywhere. Maybe there's nowhere to go." A booming roar erupted, Tommy twisting his body to get a better look at the night sky: "What the fuck?!" Commercial airplanes flew overhead, merely hundreds of feet above the ground. You instinctively covered Sarah's ears with your hands, eyes wrenching shut at the deafening rumble of their engines. Tommy swerved to avoid a police blockade ahead, turning into a nearby alleyway. 
The streets were flooded with screaming civilians, running in every direction— no one sure who exactly they were running from. A hoard of people fled from inside a movie theater, causing Tommy to shift the truck's gear into reverse. "Dad?" Sarah called out, "Dad!" Joel turned; an airplane was rapidly descending— heading straight towards town, "Shit. Move!" As the plane made contact with the ground, a mushroom cloud of fire and smoke bloomed, causing Tommy to lose control of the truck. 
A strong hand shook your leg, "Darlin'? Stay right there, don't move." Your side ached, cool liquid flowing from your head. Beside you, Sarah quickly came to, her eyes shifting to the figure hunched outside of the flipped car, clawing at the corpse of an older man. "Sarah, baby, don't look. C'mere, put your arms around me." As Joel carefully unearthed Sarah from the mangled truck, you climbed out of the shattered window: Hissing as you shifted against your arm. Sarah tried to put weight on her leg, provoking muffled whimpers and cries at the attempt. Tommy, equipped with his shotgun, called out, "We gotta get off the street!" 
As you approached Joel and Sarah, a flaming police car crashed into the capsized truck, separating the three of you from Tommy. Tommy roared from the other side of the wreck: "Meet at the river! I'll find a way." Joel turned to Sarah, "Can you run?" She shook her head wearily. He scooped her into his arms, "Keep your eyes on me." Joel shifted towards you, "No matter what, you keep runnin'. Alright, darlin'? Promise me." You hesitated, desperate eyes meeting his, "I promise." 
The three of you stumbled through the alley until you came across a cluster of bodies scattered across the pavement, crouched figures grunting over the lifeless figures. The end of the passage was clear. The only problem was getting past the rotted creatures without being noticed. There was no way Joel could outrun them in his condition. One of the creatures shot up at the sound of a remote blast, eyes landing on Joel. His voice was firm, "Go." You grabbed his arm, "Joel!" He repeated his command, louder— frantic: "You can't carry Sarah w'that arm. Go find Tommy. We'll meet you there."  
You pressed a hurried kiss to Sarah's head, the deranged man scrambling to his feet before you could embrace Joel. You took off towards the other end of the alley, Joel and Sarah barricading themselves inside the vacant diner across from the pile of carcasses. Your body throbbed with every step, head burning with the fire of a thousand suns. Your feet carried you across town, weaving in and out of injured civilians and infected until you reached the river. The stream was pitch black, sounds of gunfire and cries rang out in the distance. 
Suddenly, a bright light blinded you: "Put your hands where I can see 'em!" You obeyed, raising them as high as your injured arm would allow. Your voice raw with distress, "M'not sick! Just trying to find my family!" The man stepped closer, seemingly inspecting your physical state. He was clad in military gear, "You hurt?" You shook your head eagerly: "Just a sprained arm." He nodded his head, "Alright. We've got buses that can take you to a decontamination zone." 
Your head scanned the vast field, eyes scouring for any sign of Joel or Tommy: "I- I can't. I'm supposed to meet someone here. At the river." The soldier looked dissatisfied and slowly lifted his gun, "The river goes on for miles. S'not safe out here." Your eyebrows threaded together in confusion, "What- are you- are you gonna shoot me?" The soldier's grasp on his automatic rifle tightened, "I'm sayin' you have two choices. You can either come with me or you can-" 
A guttural scream sounded from behind him. But before he could turn around, a pair of arms seized his neck and began ripping into his military garb. The soldier flailed wildly at his attacker. While he was busy fighting off the deranged beast, you took off into the darkness, wandering aimlessly and calling out for your family. That night was the last time you saw Joel Miller.
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16 Years Later
The bitter winter air overwhelmed your senses until you were gasping for air, limbs numb and cold to the touch. You wouldn't make it much longer without shelter, without warmth. You'd spent the better part of the last 16 years searching for him— for Joel. Ever since that night, you'd scoured every independent civilization, every QZ, within mobs of infected. Each night, you silently prayed never to find him like that— skin pallid and overcome with fungus, head split wide open, cordyceps blooming from within. 
You'd trekked across the country with the sole intent of finding him alive and healthy. The journey was brutal— raiders and infected desperate for blood. But by far, the hardest battle was pushing away the nagging thought that, even if Joel and Sarah were somehow alive, you'd never find them. Now, after nearly two decades of searching, you were reaching the end of your journey. You'd officially trekked across the entire nation. If your estimations were correct, you were nearing Wyoming— hence the formidable cold front. 
You'd heard rumors about a small civilization located somewhere on the skirts of Jackson County— your last stop. You knew the chances were slim; that feeling only fortified with each city, each civilian who hadn't heard of or seen anyone by the name of "Joel Miller." But you kept searching— because the day that you stopped would be the day you lost everything, lost yourself. It was as though he held onto you with a leash. If you tugged hard enough, could you finally break free? What else did you have to live for? Maybe one day you'd have some sort of epiphany, something to make sense of all the death and suffering. For now, Joel kept your hope alive— the hope that there was happiness and safety beyond all of the pain. The very thought of him kept you alive. 
You stood in front of thick and rusted iron gates, your posture crooked due to exhaustion— Just one more stop. The sounds of cocking guns drew your attention to the top of the gates. A young man and woman stand there, rifles pointed at you: "Drop your weapon! Let us see your hands!" You obey. This is standard practice amongst civilizations— you'd done it a thousand times by now. Unsheathing and kicking away your pistol, you then throw your backpack towards the gate. Hands raised next to your head. Your voice wavers as you half-shout, "I'm not infected! Just looking for someone!" 
The woman searched your face for a bit, presumably looking for any signs of deceit. She nodded towards her companion, the corroded metal walls unfolding. Two men approached you and picked up your discarded belongings. The younger of the two roughly patted you down and checked for bite marks. When they were satisfied, they led you past the gates into the town square. The village was pleasant, a handful of people milling about in the slushy streets. 
A familiar voice erupts from behind you: "Please excuse the initial hostility. We need to be careful about who we let in... I'm Maria." She extends her hand. You accept it gingerly and introduce yourself. "Welcome to Jackson. You must be freezing. Come on, we'll talk inside." — Maria leads you inside a small building, the exterior reminding you of the Lincoln Logs you used to play with as a child. The inside is... quaint. A lone desk sits near the lit fireplace. Maria leans against the desk and motions for you to take a seat: "So... You're lookin' for someone. And you have reason to believe they're here?" 
You sigh, allowing your aching body to relax against the couch's plush cushions: "No... I am looking for someone, but... Well, this is my last stop." Maria nods sympathetically, tucking a lone braid behind her ear— "I get it. You've been looking for a long time. It's about time to stop. To rest." You can't help the tears that form on your waterline. Your gaze shifts to your lap. Maria continues, "Who are you lookin' for?" 
You swallow the fist-sized lump in your throat, "Joel. Joel Miller." Your attention snaps towards her as a wistful sigh escapes her lips. A tight frown dawns on Maria's face, "I'm sorry. There's no Joel Miller here." You nod; you knew it was a long shot, but hearing it aloud was something different entirely. You rise from the couch, "Thank you. I apologize for takin' up your time." Maria speaks up before you can reach the door: "Now what? You got a place to stay?" 
You honestly hadn't thought that far, about life beyond looking. For years, finding Joel was your only purpose— your rationale for remaining on this infested hellscape. You had no home, no roots. Maria's voice interrupts your thoughts, "There's room here. We've got food and water— shelter. Hell, we're even working on electricity." You turn to face her. Her words dripping with verity, "Jackson could be your home." 
Despite having just met her, Maria's words touched something buried deep within you— hope. Hopeful of a new life, of new beginnings. You forged a small smile, "Okay." Maria smiled, but it was much different from yours: It was toothy, genuine— "Alright. I'll give you the grand tour then." For the next hour or so, Maria marched you around town. She showed you the vast dining hall laden with maple furniture. The stables filled with mare and their young. 
Then she showed you the schoolhouse. It was a small brick building. The walls were filled with colorful crayon drawings. Tiny handprints were pressed onto the wall in various colors of acrylic paint. The dulcet sounds of innocent laughter erupted from every corner of the room. Children from the ages of 5-12 were scattered around: Some doing arts and crafts, some reading, and others playing with worn toys. A tear slipped down your cheek. You brushed it away quickly before Maria could notice. 
You couldn't help but think of Sarah. About the first time she knocked on your door— she was selling chocolate bars for some fundraiser at school. Her bronze complexion dappled with freckles, and her wide smile revealed a missing tooth. She was eleven at the time, eyes bright and full of wonder. Blind to the atrocities that loomed at every turn. Sometimes, you'd think about what she looked like now— did her curls still rest atop her shoulders? Did she still laugh until she was panting for air? She's thirty now... Has she fallen in love? That was considering she is still... 
You didn't entertain the thought. Sarah was fine, alive somewhere with her father to look after her. Maria's touch pulls you from your thoughts, "How about I show you where you'll be living? Get you settled in." As Maria exited the schoolhouse, you stole one last glance at the room. A little girl met your gaze. Her dark curls were pulled into two ponytails. Her burnt mahogany eyes crinkled at the corners as she smiled, raising her tiny hand and waving it at you. You returned the sentiment, this time allowing the tear to fall down and onto the ground.  
Maria escorted you just outside of town, to a street lined with country-style two-story houses in relatively good condition. "This one here, the green one. It's already furnished. I'll have one of my guys come by later with some essentials from the pantry. Otherwise, you should be all set 'til tomorrow." Your eyes bore into the house. It was nice, but also... "It's big," you retort, "Don't know what I could possibly need all those rooms for." Maria lays the silver key in your hand, "You never know." 
You internally cringe at the connotation. Start over with some man? Have a big family and a white picket fence? You couldn't. It wouldn't be the same. You let out a shaky breath, "Thank you, Maria." She nods, "Come see me tomorrow, and we'll talk about where to go from here. Everyone in Jackson has a job, a role to play. Rest up... You deserve it." She departs, leaving just you and your great, big, empty house. 
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3 Years Later
Jackson developed rapidly under Maria's supervision. The population rose from 50 to roughly 300 in just under three years. Jackson now had electricity, thanks to the Jackson County Hydroelectric Dam that Maria's team was able to get up and running. You'd become the head of patrol— in charge of organizing the schedules and determining the routes. You and Maria had become very close, practically family. She's the person who understood you, what you've been through. 
In an attempt to busy yourself and earn your keep, you'd thrown yourself into working alongside her. Not just with patrols but also with community relations and development. You'd completely reconstructed the greenhouse, built a jailhouse— that, luckily, wasn't used much— and helped fortify Jackson's defenses. Maria assigned you the title "community leader," but you much preferred what everyone else called you: "Maria's right hand." 
Your house was still too big, but now it felt homier— lived in. The walls were plastered with botanical paintings you'd found while out on patrol, vases of fresh cut flowers from the community garden placed upon every surface. Cable knit blankets were draped over the shabby leather furniture, the brick fireplace emanating warmth and bringing solace during the cold winter months. You'd even taken up baking in your spare time, frequently bringing baked goods to the schoolhouse. 
Nevertheless, when the sun set and the sounds of bustling downtown Jackson faded, your thoughts always returned to Joel. His bronze skin, tousled brown curls, and perfectly plump lips. Suddenly, it felt as though the house was mocking you, and the right side of the bed always grew colder. Perhaps it's why you worked yourself so hard; taking a day off was seldom. You couldn't escape the persistent feeling that Joel and Sarah weren't alive. That you'd failed to find them time and time again because somewhere, they were six feet under, buried in an unmarked grave. All it takes is one moment— one lapse between heartbeats— and suddenly, everything has changed.
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The spring air was crisp with morning dew. A gentle breeze slipped through the cracked bay window. Three heavy thuds woke you— the sharp knocks cutting through serene silence. Your voice was raspy with sleep, "Coming!" You quickly pulled on the worn terrycloth robe that hung from the bedpost and stumbled downstairs. You swung the door open to reveal Stanley, a young man who worked in construction: "I'm so sorry to wake you, but Maria sent me to get you. She said it's urgent."  
You sighed deeply, rubbing the remaining exhaustion from your face: "Urgent like, 'don't get dressed' urgent?" Stanley's eyes roamed across the dark fabric of your robe before snapping back to your face. His cheeks bright pink, "Oh, um... no! Just meet her in her office ASAP." Sending him off with a nod, you traipsed upstairs and threw on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt before making your way downtown. It was early morning, the streets empty save the early risers milling about, getting ready for work. As you passed a group of older women sipping hot beverages, you overheard whispers of "an outsider." As Maria's righthand, you were expected to greet all incoming arrivals. How on earth that could constitute a crisis, you did not know. 
As you approached Maria's office, the woman in question exited swiftly, shutting the door behind her. You grew closer, taking note of her fidgeting hands. She was... nervous? "Good morning, Mar. What's the emergency?" Maria's face was sullen. You'd never seen her like this, not in the three years you'd known her. Your hands clenched at your sides, "Maria? What is it?"
She took a deep breath, "This may be a false alarm, but... This guy's last name is Miller. Says he's originally from Texas." Her words stole the air from your lungs, a pit forming in the bottom of your stomach. She said something else, but all you could hear was buzzing. Your vision blurred, the dark-skinned woman's features coming in and out of focus. Could it be him—had Joel finally found you? 
Maria called your name, pulling you from your trance. As your vision focused, you pushed past her. Your grip on the doorknob was bone-crushing, your knuckles turning white from the tension. You inhaled— don't get your hopes up. It might not be him. You exhaled, pushing the door open with a startling amount of force. You analyzed the man's figure, you recognized him— only it wasn't Joel. It wasn't the Miller whose calloused hands once traveled the expanse of your body, making note of each hidden crevice as though it may hold treasure. Whose lips once seared white hot kisses in the places he knew were the most sensitive— "Tommy?"
He looked dumbstruck, his lips parted in shock. Before you could stop yourself, you threw your arms around his neck. It took him a moment to reciprocate your embrace, but once he did, his arms anchored you in place. He spoke your name quietly against the crown of your head: "I can't... I can't believe it." You pulled away, "I hardly can either." His hands rested atop your shoulders as his eyes searched your face in disbelief. His resemblance to his older brother felt like a gut punch. You were afraid to ask— fearful of the truth: "Joel? Is he..."
Tommy's hand squeezed your shoulder in reassurance, "He's alive. Last I checked, holed up somewhere in the Boston QZ." A warm tear slipped down your face, the salty liquid resting just below your chin. You'd checked Boston QZ, but recent "terrorist" attacks had made it impossible to stay longer than an hour without drawing the attention of every FEDRA soldier in that godforsaken city. Your hands trembled as you clutched your chest, "And Sarah? How's my sweet girl?" 
Tommy's face went cold— No. No. She can't— "She's gone." The taste of bile rose in your throat, "Wh-when?" Tommy removed his hands from your shoulders, "That night. Shot by some military fucker. She..." He hesitated, "Joel held her. It happened s'fast." Your kneels buckled, threatening to send you towards the ground. You fucked up— you let yourself get accustomed to the idea of her being alive. Repeated it over and over again until you believed it to be true. This was all your fault. 
Your shoulders shook silently, as if you were crying— but no tears emerged, "I have to… I have to find Joel." Turning toward the door, Tommy caught you by your wrist: "I can't let you do that, hon. It's a damn death sentence." You tugged at your arm, desperate to break free from the restraint: "Let go of me, Tommy. I'm doin' this." Maria stepped forward, her hand resting at the base of your neck— "No, you're not. Jackson needs you here. I need you here."
Your breathing became labored. Deep down, you knew they were right— you were in no shape to travel across the country again. You'd barely survived it the first time. Chest heaving, your free hand found purchase on your throat, tightly grasping and constricting the airway. Tommy wearily let go of your wrist, his eyes wide and filled with fear. You ran for the door; you could hear Tommy call out for you as you fled homeward. Sarah was gone. Joel was alone.
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Days passed, and despite everything, the sun rose in the morning and the moon at night. You weren't quite sure how long it had been. You'd stopped counting daybreak after the first five came and went. Maria checked in after the first couple of days, worried that you hadn't been seen around town— or leaving your house, for that matter. Your grief was debilitating, all-consuming. You couldn't eat, could barely sleep, only finding relief at the bottom of a liquor bottle. You were tired… The kind of tired that sleep didn't fix.
Tommy came once. Sat and talked while you stared straight ahead at the empty wall. He could sense your anger, your resentment. How could he not? You silently judged him for leaving Joel, leaving his brother after his only daughter died in his arms. Tommy told you that Joel had changed. He wasn't the Joel you fell in love with; he'd done terrible things— But so had you. You'd killed innocent people, people who were just trying to protect themselves. And you did it in the name of finding Joel and Sarah, of surviving for them. You'd convinced yourself it was kill or be killed, and you had to live with that. Come judgment day, you'd pay greatly for your sins. You accepted that, too.
You only dared to look at Tommy's face once. You saw Joel in his eyes— you saw Sarah. Maybe if you hadn't left Joel in that alleyway, she'd still be alive. You could've protected her, taken the bullet for her. You would have, without hesitation. You'd cross the fiery pits of hell for her, reside in Caina, and be tortured for eternity. You may not have given birth to her, but Sarah was your daughter.
If you closed your eyes hard enough, you could faintly picture her smile. The dimples that formed just below her bottom lip. You could smell the faint aroma of her strawberry shampoo. Hear the broken remnants of her grandiose laughter. You swore to keep those memories someplace safe. Take them out and remember when you needed to, as if they were photographs.
A part of you wanted to be happy that she didn't suffer. She was too innocent for this new, heartless world. She was everything good in life. She was sunshine, sugary syrup, and pure, unadulterated love. But you could not accept this bright side. Not when it meant a life without her in it. Innocence is beautiful, but life is for living.
Tommy stood up, slipping a piece of paper on the nightstand. You cautiously turned it over to reveal a creased photo: You, Joel, and Sarah posing after winning one of her soccer games. You stole one last glance at Tommy. This time, he did not see blinding hatred in your gaze. Instead, he saw gratitude. As your glassy eyes bore into him, he nodded knowingly and left.
Maria came a couple of hours later with leftovers from the dining hall. Setting them on the counter next to the empty whiskey bottles displayed like pathetic trophies. You were in the same position as when Tommy left. You held the photo in your hands, thumbs stroking its frayed edges. Maria quietly dragged a chair closer to the bed, sitting just within arm's reach: "I went to a really dark place after I lost Kevin."
Tearing your gaze from the picture, one of her hands finds yours: "He made life worth living… It took me a long time to start to feel human again. To feel something other than pain and sorrow. The grief never goes away. But slowly, it starts to feel less like loss, and more like love." She inhaled shakily, "I know what you're feeling right now. I know why you're drowning your sorrows in that shit, trying to drink yourself to death." A tear slips down your face, her hand squeezing yours gently: "But you have to understand… What you're feeling right now, that's love. You're not a bad person for how you try to kill your sadness. But it's not gonna work."
You're unable to contain the choked sob that escapes your throat. The tears come harshly, scorching saline against your skin. Maria shifts her weight from the chair onto the bed, holding your shaking frame: "It's okay… Let it out." Her hands cradle your head, smoothing over your disheveled hair. "It's all my fault," you gasp between sobs, "I never should've left them. It's all my fault." Maria shushes you, "No, honey. You don't really believe that. You want someone to blame, but you're not that person."
Eventually, the tears cease. Your breathing evened out as Maria held you, "I miss Joel, so fucking much." You could feel Maria nod tenderly, "I know Honey." A lone tear slipped down your cheek, "Do you think— do you think he'll find me?" Maria pulled away, her chestnut eyes meeting yours, "Truthfully, I don't know." With a deep sigh, she squeezed your hand— "But I know he wouldn't want you to live like this. Isolating yourself from everyone else. You're allowed to grieve, but please don't shut me out. You're my person." You clutch her hands, squeezing firmly: "Even at my worst?" Her arms curled around your torso once again, "Even at your worst."
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The warmer seasons passed with haste. A wintertide blanket of white gradually covered Jackson. Day by day, Maria and Tommy were able to pull you out of your depressive stupor. You had to admit, they made quite the team. Maria was ultimately right, Joel wouldn't want you to spend the rest of your life a bedridden drunkard. But still, life without him was arduous. There wasn't a day that passed that you didn't think of Joel Miller. About where he was, what he was doing, who he was with, and whether he missed you as terribly as you did him. 
As much as you wished to focus on these melancholic thoughts, new developments began to bloom in Jackson. Tommy and Maria's blossoming love was hard to ignore and impossible to disapprove of. Watching two people whom you adored fall in love, it felt as though nothing had changed: No cordyceps, no raiders, just Jackson and all of its inhabitants. Perhaps you could find peace in that. When Maria told you that they were expecting, you were over the moon. Maria and Tommy deserved it, Jackson deserved it. Proof that the world is not over— that no matter the circumstances, mankind will prevail. 
You threw together a small wedding ceremony with the help of the florist and local bakery, the couple wanting to tie the knot before the baby's arrival. Joking about how "shotgun weddings" withstood the test of time. Something arose in you, a pang of jealousy— Envious that you and Joel never got the perfect white wedding. It disgusted you, so you buried it deep within the recesses of your heart. 
The winter was hard, the Wyoming chill threatening every crop that dared to sprout from the Earth. This resulted in you spending extra time in the greenhouse. You found gardening to be a rather soothing task, being able to nurture new life in a world marked by death and decay. It also provided plenty of time to think: Something that you did not relish. No matter how many times you pushed the thought of Joel away, it always returned. Whether it was at dawn or late at night plaguing your dreams. 
When you weren't at Tommy and Maria's house or at the Tipsy Bison, you were in the greenhouse. The small shack sat right on the outskirts of town, situated with the perfect view of downtown Jackson. The glass panes shut out the cold, trapping any warmth inside. You bathed in the basking glow of the sun, gravitating towards it as a Sunflower would. You weren't sure when thoughts of Sarah became joyous, memories no longer met with choked cries but instead with soft chuckles. Nonetheless, you welcomed the growth. It's how she would want you to remember her. 
You watched the clock that hung just above the door, a mere estimation of the time: 12:15 p.m. You carefully removed your dirt-caked gloves, setting them on the wooden bench beside you. Your stomach growled impatiently as you began the journey downtown. The air was frigid despite the sun's rays, the cold slowly numbing your fingers. As you ambled towards town, Stanley came jogging towards you: "Hey! Just got word from the gates that Maria's back. Brought some stragglers, two, I think." 
You nodded in his direction, "Alright. Thanks, Stan." The soft crunch of snow beneath your feet accompanied you as you approached downtown Jackson, an air of excitement and uncertainty radiating off of the townsfolk. It wasn't every day that Jackson came across people who weren't just blood-thirsty raiders looking for valuables. As you rounded a corner, you overheard a commotion, the sound of yelling. Strangely, it didn't sound angry or fearful. It sounded... happy. 
Midtown came into view; the construction that was being worked on was now abandoned. Immediately, your gaze fixed on two figures in the middle of the street embracing. That was... not typical. You could make one man out to be Tommy; his black curls contrasted starkly against his warm taupe skin. The other was taller and broader, his hair disheveled and graying. Behind them you could make out Maria on horseback, next to her was a young girl, who couldn't be older than thirteen. 
Maria's expression was borderline unreadable, a mixture of trepidation and relief. Until her eyes met yours, then her face softened. A look of tenderness emerged. Everything about this situation puzzled you— Until the two figures broke apart. The man stood inches from Tommy, his hands gripping Tommy's shoulders firmly. His face was sunken with exhaustion and hunger; a vast smile overtook his face. A smile you would recognize anywhere. 
He looked just as he had twenty years ago, only now his hair was significantly longer and his beard gray. His face was now littered with wrinkles, just as yours was. A telltale sign that time had, in fact, passed, that the world fell apart right in front of your eyes. Your fingers dug into your thigh. You surely would've drawn blood if not for the layer of denim protecting your skin. You knew you were grieving, but hallucinations seemed extreme. You took a hesitant step forward, still on the opposite end of the street. 
Maria beckoned for you. Your name seemingly catching Tommy's attention as he turned towards you. As the men stood side-by-side, it was impossible to deny. Their likeness evoked something in you— realization. You weren't dreaming, you weren't hallucinating. He was there, just a yard away: Joel Miller. His gaze found yours, eyes searching your face in disbelief. Your name left his mouth like a question, but it sounded like a prayer. 
He stepped forward as if he was testing the waters. You repeated his action, "Joel?" A smile broke across his face once again, causing you to break into a sprint. He jogged forward, careful not to slip on the icy gravel. Tears began streaming down your face, their warmth countering the icy chill. Before you could slow down, your body collided with his. His arms were tense, his hold fastening around you. You'd only dreamt of this moment for two decades. 
You weren't sure how long you stood like that. Head nestled firmly against his chest, tears staining his leather coat. His gloved fingers gently grasped your chin, pulling your face from its sanctuary: "Baby... Fuck, I can't believe it." His eyes searched your face for any sign of unease. He could find nothing but pure joy: "You found me. I searched for you, Joel Miller, for 16 years. And you found me." 
Joel let out a breathy chuckle, cut off as you captured his lips in a velvety kiss. At first, it was chaste.— A silent admission of consolation, twenty years in the making. You ran your tongue across his bottom lip, prompting him to groan as he opened his mouth to deepen the kiss. After a moment, a loud cough erupted from behind you. You reluctantly pull away, your forehead resting against his. Your hands cupped his cheeks, eyes glassy with relief and adoration: "After all this time?" Joel leans forward to place a gentle kiss on the corner of your mouth, "Would wait forever f'you, Darlin'." 
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© 2023 fragilefable do not plagiarize, translate, or repost my writing to any other site.
divider by @saradika
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bluerosefox · 11 months
Text
Taking a Chance
I want more TaliaxDanny stuff so how about this AU. Its mostly HEAVILY hinted though.
[Side note: Danny is in his 20s, maybe mid 20s btw, also enjoy my actual writing style, haven't done this in a while besides some small snippets I write]
Talia discovers the future plans Ra's has for her baby, her heir, her child. She is hurt and enraged because "How dare he! How dare he raise my son to be a sacrificial lamb just to extend his own life!" And the fact he had no plans to truly step down from being the Demon Head. (Basically the timeline where Ra's planned to overtake Damain's body)
-x-x-
Talia stared, her green eyes almost glowing toward the sleeping form of her son on her bed. Her eyes roamed his tiny face, the way he lightly dozed the day away unknowingly of the danger that had set in stone for him. Yes, being not just her son but the son of the Bat and the grandson of the Demon Head he was always going to be in danger but never had she really thought the danger would come from the very person who just declared him his heir. At least not in the way its been presented.
Talia had just discovered the fate her father, Ra's al Ghul, the same man that had held Damian not even a day ago and spoke of the future he could see Damian bring to the League once he was of age and would lead it, had actually planned for her son.
He planned on using her son, raising him to be the perfect heir.... to... to...
Use him as a vessel in the end.
He planned to leave his old decaying body, a body that was beginning to no longer respond to the Lazarus Pits as of late, and basically jump ship to a younger and better body...
The body of her son. The son she created and craved to have and raise. The son she made with her beloved's blood running in his veins.
Despite how enraged she is' Talia knows she can't confront her father. He would kill her... no he would torture her by hurting her baby to the point death would be a mercy if she tried. She also knows she can't go running to Bruce, she had burned the bridge to him ages ago when she refused to leave her father and his teachings and knows he would rip Damian away from her should she tell him what she did. He would, under the guise of protecting their child gain sole custody from Talia, set up next to nothing visitation rights for her to follow. He would say it would be to protect Damian from Ra's but Talia knows Bruce, knows he would use it as a half-excuse just to keep her away... but Talia wants to be in her child's life. Wants to raise him. Wants to be his mother, despite knowing next to nothing on how to be an actual normal mother, she wanted to try. She needed to try.
Running away was also out of the question, especially since Damian had been declared her father 'heir'. He would hunt them down and there was no where in this world she could hide that her father could not find them...
And-
Talia barely gives any warning when she flings the knife behind her. She waited for only a second, either to hear the ting of metal being blocked or the sound of it burying itself onto the wooden door she knew was in its pathway.
Instead she heard neither of those things and instead heard the ticking of a grandfather clock and a deep chuckle.
"As expected from the daughter of the Demon. Sharp and deadly with no hesitation in sight."
"Who are you." It was not a question but a demand. She slowly turned her head and was meet with an odd sight that even the daughter of the Demon has never seen before.
"At most.. an ally to have. At worst, merely a passing stranger with an offer."
The ticking never stopped.
Everything else outside the room though did.
-x-x-
Danny stared, his currently green eyes burning even more brightly than they normally do. Many emotions passed through them, anger, frustration, pain, sadness, regret, heartbreak, and hopelessness to name a few.
He stared at the tiny sleeping face within the healing pod in front of him and closed his eyes as memories of spending time with the one sleeping filled his mind.
"My King." A voice began, Danny's sharp pointed ears twitch for a moment and he turned his head slightly but it was all the speaker needed to know that they had his attention even if he didn't give them his full attention.
"I bring the updated reports from Chief Frostbite you requested." The young yeti ghost said, this had Danny finally turning around and looking upwards and towards the young yeti, who was smaller than Frostbite but none the less bigger than Danny. Danny held his hand out and took the stack of papers in their hands.
Once the papers were in his hands he gave a curt wave of his fingers as if to say 'go on' without actually saying the words and turned his attention to the words on the papers. The young yeti, Icewinds took the signal and began.
"Princess Danielle's core has remained the same since the last check up. No major sign of deteriorating or destabilizing... However that also means there have been no signs of improvement or healing as well..." Icewinds stopped for a moment, allowing their King to register the words being spoken "We will continue to monitor her as best as we can but... My King..."
Icewinds took a deep breath and delivered the news everyone already knew "Without a female donor to complete her Ecto-DNA, should the Princess suffers from another Fading even a minor one, I fear it might be too much for her core and with her current body form it will not be able to withstand the stress... I'm truly sorry My King."
The room fell silent, the only real sounds being the monitors in the room and sound of rustling papers in Danny's hands, who was staring blankly at the words written on them but not really taking them in.
After a moment, Icewinds shifting uncomfortably for a second, Danny spoke his voice raw but strong and firm "I understand. Please inform Frostbite I am... grateful for his, yours, and everyone's continued support and everything everyone's has done to help her... If you do not mind Icewinds, I would... Like to be alone for a while and think... For a moment."
"O-Of course My King." And with that Icewinds left the room, Danny barely taking not of the door closing and his enhanced hearing picking up the hushed soft words being spoken to the Knights that stood outside the room of Danny's request of being left alone for a while.
Once the talking outside the room faded, Danny tilted his body and head back on the chair he had been sitting in for the last few days and allowed the papers he had his hands to fall out and onto the floor. Danny took in a shaky breath and closed his burning eyes as he tried to keep his core emotions in control, knowing if he lost control the Realms would echo him and would panic or worry his people.
And he couldn't deal with that. Not now.
"Clockwork, whatever timeline you are trying to set in motion, I hope it pans out soon." Danny rasped out as he tried his best to keep himself from falling apart. Losing Danielle, losing the girl that was his clone, his mirror, but also was like a sister... daughter sometimes would break him, harshly and deeply.
He knew his advisor and resident Timekeeper had something in the works, the way the aging spirit had looked at him before he left was telling when the news of Danielle's suffering from another Fading attack and Frostbite having to perform a Core Transform nearly last second, which in turn turned her into a baby from how close she was to fully Fading, had been delivered to Danny and the others.
But despite knowing Clockwork had a plan, Danny knew that smile he had before he had left. It had been Clockwork's 'Have hope, but even I am unsure.' smile, a rare one the Timekeeper would wear when even he didn't know which way the pendulum of chance would swing first.
So he did the only thing he could do for now, and that was to remain in the room with Danielle, keep her stabilized as best as he could with his own ectoplasim flowing, and wait to see if whatever Clockwork had planned would work out.
Waiting, even with all he's done in his life from becoming a Halfa, to defending his home and haunt, from fighting off insane Fruitloops to dismantling government bigots until there was nothing left of them, all the way to fighting a tyrannicidal Ghost King to the point Danny had won the crown by Trail by Combat thus taking up the mantle of Ghost King of the Infinite Realms since his seventeenth birthday and bringing the Infinite Realms into a new age of healing the broken crumbling lands and ruling over all justly but firmly, waiting was all he could do for Danielle.
And the waiting. The stress. Was agonizing.
Because what they needed was...
Was a miracle if Danny was to be honest. They needed a female, a donor in all sense of the words, to complete Danielle's incomplete Ecto-DNA, because of course that damned Fruitloop tried skipping steps in creating a clone of Danny and it was no wonder he had failed so many times with only Danielle the most stable of them all and given the fact she still wasn't was damning, but they couldn't just have any female donate their DNA to her.
No the DNA needed the donor to at least be limenal, thus turning the DNA into Ecto-DNA because Danielle was created to be a halfa... The only problem was that the person in question needed to be Jazz level of limenal Ecto-DNA as well.
Meaning that despite both Sam and Val offering their Ecto-DNA from the years of being exposed to the Realms and Ectoplasim theirs wasn't enough to work with Danielle's. Jazz's Ecto-DNA was off the table seeing as she was his sister and mixing it with Danielle's would just lead to problems.
No they needed someone who was born near or in ectoplasm, breathed it, ate or at least filtered it, grew with it for years like Jazz and Danny did, basically the person in question just needed one odd day of dying and returning to life at the same time to becoming a halfa levels of limenal. Only those high levels could complete and combined with Danielle's.
Which given the fact only Jazz had those levels, finding someone near those levels was like looking for needle in space, because forget the haystack.
"....You've returned." Was the only words Danny said when his ears caught the sound of a ticking clock suddenly in the room, his anxiety raising as both dread and a tiny slimmer of hope both slowly climb up in his emotions, knowing whatever answer Clockwork would give him would outweigh the other.
"On time, as always My King." His cryptic Timekeeper responded "I bring... a chance."
Those words were enough to snap Danny out of his chair, he quickly looked towards where Clockwork's voice had been coming from and floated. His eyes burning with determination for a moment before he caught sight of movement behind Clockwork.
Behind the ever changing being stood a breathtaking woman. Tall and proud from the way she held herself, she looked a few years older than him but Danny could sense she was far older her soul not really matching her body. She was lovely to look at no doubt but deadly, very deadly and that was something else Danny could sense after all he was the Ghost King.
And she wasn't alone for in her arms was a baby, roughly the same age that Danielle had been de-aged to as well.
Danny blinked at them when he noticed something.
She...
She was limenal.
Very limenal. Even more limenal than Jazz.
In fact both of them were.
"I would like you to meet Lady Talia al Ghul and her son Damian, My King." Clockwork said as he gave a tiny bow towards the woman who stepped forward, a frown on her face she took in Danny's features and her eyes darting towards Danielle's healing pod for a moment, Danny could see she was tensed and a little weary from no doubt everything so far.
".... Welcome Lady Talia to the Infinite Realms. I am King Phantom." Danny greeted, his many years of training with other royalties coming forward as second nature now, he wasn't some normal teen from the middle of the Mid-West after all. "Has Clockwork told you the reasoning as to why you have been... chosen?"
He honestly would put it past Clockwork to be cryptic about the reasoning, but he hoped he hadn't because Danny really didn't want to explain the importance of it all and why they needed to hurry. And judging by the roll of his eyes Clockwork knew what Danny had been meaning as well.
"Yes King Phantom" Talia spoke, her voice rich and silky that sent a tiny shiver up Danny's spine from the sound "You need my DNA to help heal your clone. Should it be successful however it will change her from being merely a clone to instead into becoming yours and mine daughter."
"Correct." Was Danny's response, short and to the point. He needed her answer now if they wanted to save even a fragment of Danielle's core.
The room fell silent again, each them of taking a moment to think.
But eventually Talia spoke. Her voice steady and strong.
"I will offer my aid to you and yours... But only if you swear to both me and my son that we will be given sanctuary from my father and any who dares harm us for the blood that runs in our veins."
Danny only had one answer to that as his eyes caught hers.
Because despite being the Ghost King Phantom nowadays. He had once been Danny Phantom whose core started as a protector spirit and could sense the honestly of needing safety in her words.
"Yes."
-x-x-
Clockwork watched and smiled at the two adults in the room as they continued to stare at each other.
He knew he had been cutting it close, waiting for Talia to be at the ends of ropes and needing a chance to finally leave her deadly and abusive father without the toxic strings attached her ex would tie around her under the guise of safety for their son.
Turning his attention away from the two as they began to speak terms, Clockwork cast his gaze towards an window in the room and stared out of it, smile still on his face as glimpses of the rare future he saw slowly rose up more frequently.
Danny and Talia slowly and surely working together to raise not just Danielle, or rather Ellie as they renamed her since she was no longer a clone of Danny, but also Damian together. Passing them off as twins to those outside the Realms or Amity Park.
Talia learning to release the toxic love she had towards Bruce Wayne, and understand if someone truly loved you for you, they would demand sudden change from the only way of life one knows. That since she was no longer the thumb of her father she could finally be free to be herself.
Danny learning that despite being crowned so early in his life, that the weight of the crown didn't need to be carried alone. Sure he had his friends and family but Danny needed someone, someone who understood the weight of the feeling of needing to wear it head held high. And who better to help teach that than the woman who had to carry the name Daughter of the Demon Head herself.
The two growing closer and closer. Until fondness changed and shifted into more. As they raised the two infants with laughter and joy and love.
Ellie getting a kiss from Talia on the forehead when she had a nightmare and seeked her mother out for comfort. Toddler Damian riding Cujo around the castle as he copied Fright Knight after watching him ride off, Danny floating right by him making sure he didn't fall off. Ellie learning how to fight not just from her mother but from her idol Pandora. Damian learning to identify the stars and their names from the man he saw, and later wished was, his father. Ellie and Damian building pillow forts in the library and reading all manners of stories to each other. Danny and Talia holding their tiny hands as they took them to their first day of school within Amity Park their joyful laughter bringing soft smiles on their parents faces.
Danny holding a crying Talia as she explained the things she had been taught and forced to learn by the orders of her father in the dead of night. Doing his best to calm her down as he had been taught by Jazz ages ago.
Talia standing tall and firm when the Observants tried to undermined a order, no a law Danny had set in motion that had upset the eyeballs badly. How she gathered evidence of their attempts to go against it and how they were nothing but traitors towards their King and couldn't weasel themselves out of it this time.
Clockwork smiled warmly when he caught sight of one more glimpse of this future timeline.
Talia dressed beautifully, a crown made of stars and black jewels on her head. Her son dancing with her as firm as he could but his little tongue peeking out of his mouth as he concentrated on his steps and was dressed like a tiny prince complete with a tiny crown of stars on his head as well, Talia's face held a tiny smile of love watching him try his hardest to dance correctly with her. Joyful squeals of laughter rang out as King Phantom twirled with Ellie, who was dressed like a true princess, in his arms.
Around them in the ballroom the citizens of Realms laughed, joyfully danced, sang, ate, or merely watched. For the first time in many, many years the Realms felt... Complete. Whole. Happy.
A true wonderful afterlife that all could enjoy.
Yes.
He knew waiting the last second was a long shot, for a chance that almost wasn't, but the future he saw was well worth it.
A good future. A balanced one. A happy afterlife one.
Now, all he had to do was wait for the seeds of this future to bloom.
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mrsdesade · 3 months
Note
I'd like something based on Sage vs fem!supe! Maybe them arguing and then Homie forced to choose between one of them, but everything ending up with something unexpected! You choose what :)
Shattered glasses;
Pairing: Homelander x fem!super (I use Ophera bc I don't like writing ''y/n'' y'know) TW: slight angst, mention of poisoning, morally grey fem!supe Timeline: season 4 Words count: 2,7k Note: thanks for the request dear anon, I was waiting for writing something about s4 :) ofc no hate for any characters!!
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Sister Sage never liked you. From the first moment she saw you, she knew you would be a hindrance. She's not jealous, not even in love with him, she just wanted to control Homelander, and you already had him in your grasp. But the little flaws in your absolutely not perfect relationship with him were the perfect opportunity for her to destroy you and get you fired.
For months she had been trying to make you look incompetent or unable to do your work, she was the smartest woman in the world, and in her eyes you were just another showgirl like the others.
But you were on the Seven from the early years and, oh, you didn't liked at all the fact that Homelander had chosen her as his advisor.
You, you are his partner, he should listen to you.
It has always been about control, rarely about love. But now you feel jealousy boiling in your veins, your control over him is slipping away, and you feel in danger. You know that you'll have to prove to Sage that it is not so easy to get rid of you.
Sister Sage sat comfortably at the table of the Seven, her hands folded in front of her, sipping a steaming cup of chamomile tea. With a delicate motion, she set the cup back down on its saucer, and flashed you a calm smile.
“I think you’re letting your emotions cloud your judgment. You’re making this personal. It’s simply business.”
She's too confident in her intellectual abilities, to the point of arrogance. She's good at reading people, especially their feelings and insecurities, and she uses that to her advantage in arguments, trying to make you say something stupid and make you look like a fool.
“You’ve had your chance at the top, dear. It’s time to accept that things have changed.”
You are standing, with your hands placed on the table, clenched into two fists to hold back your nervousness, looking for the right words to face her, but nothing comes out of your lips.
“Listen, I understand your… frustration. After all, you’re nothing more than a relic these days, don’t you think? A fading star.”
The words hit you like a blow to the gut. Her casual insults were like salt rubbed vigorously into an open wound. You fight back the urge to respond with anger, knowing that she's goading you into a reaction.
“Oh, I hit a nerve, didn’t I? That’s exactly what I meant. You’re stuck in the past. You can’t adjust to the changes. It’s kinda pathetic, really.”
You wanted nothing more than to reach across the table and wipe that arrogant smile off her face, but you knew that’s exactly what she wanted. So you took a deep breath, trying to maintain some semblance of composure.
“I suggest you think about your words better, the last person who dared to call me pathetic didn't end well.”
Sage raised an eyebrow, intrigued.
“You can try to intimidate me all you want, but it won’t change the fact that your time has passed. No matter what you do, you won't be able to get your spotlight back.”
“Dear, I fill the stadiums, the arenas, millions of people come to hear my voice every night, every single event is sold out in minutes! I wouldn't call this decay of a carreer.”
“Ah, yes, the fame and the adoration of the masses. Impressive, really. But I was referring to another type of spotlight here.”
She paused for a moment, studying your face before continuing. Your gaze has become dark, almost threatening, you know perfectly well where he wants his speech to end.
“We both know you lost your real spotlight a long time ago…the one that matters. Homelander won’t change his mind about me.”
Your expression betrays your emotions, anger and frustration bubbling just beneath the surface.
“You're playing a dangerous game Sage, you know that? You think you can just waltz in here and take my place?”
“Ophera, is it so hard to accept that I’m better equipped for the job? You’ve always been so blinded by your ego and your pride. Your strategy is always to stay safe and not lose your career, Vought needs much more than this.”
Her expression was cool and calculating, as If she had already mapped out every possible reaction you might have.
“And let's clarify, I don’t need to take your spot. I already have.”
Your face twisted in anger, your fists gripped the table’s edge, under your gloves knuckles turning white.
“You arrogant little—“ you began, but she calmly interrupted you.
“Now, now, there’s no need for insults.” she chided, her voice dripping with faux sweetness. “We’re adults here, we can speak calmly and intelligently like any normal person, don’t you agree?”
“You're feeling cool, mh? Acting all smart and knowing everything. I've been a part of this Seven for years. And you, you're nothing.”
Her cool demeanor began to crack, and a hint of annoyance flickered across her face at your words.
“Ah, here it goes. The same old tired argument. I've been here longer, I'm more experienced, blah blah blah.”
She leaned forward, her eyes boring into yours with an intensity that contradicted her calm exterior.
“Oh, did I hit a nerve?” you teased, mirroring her earlier taunt.
“Don't get too comfortable.” she retorted, her voice slightly sharpened. “You should remember that your position here is fragile. One wrong word, one wrong move, and you could lose everything you have left.“
You leaned forward now, your voice lowering as you met her gaze.
“You seem to forget that I’ve still a pretty big influence over Homelander myself. I can make things difficult for you if I want to.”
“I think we both know who he listens to these days.”
The conversation was cut short when the door to the room burst open, and Homelander strolled in, his presence immediately filling the space. His eyes flicked between the two of you, sensing the tension in the room.
“What's going on here?”
You and Sage both turned your attention to him, quickly composing yourselves.
“Just a chat. I was merely informing Ophera of some important developments within about the Vought future.”
Homelander glanced at you, tilting his head slightly as he observed.
“A chat, huh? Didn't look like a friendly one to me.”
“You're right. And since it's clear that Sage loves telling you lies, I'll tell you that wasn't just a simple chat.” an adorable, mischievous smile escapes from your lips. Exposing the little lie she told to him.
Homelander's eyes immediately landed on Sage, waiting for her to respond. “Care to explain?”
Sage shifted in her seat, clearly irritated that you had exposed her lie. “It's nothing serious, just a typical argument between colleagues. Nothing you need to worry about.” she replied quickly, trying to downplay the situation.
And incredibly, it works.
Homelander nods like a tamed puppy and believes her.
You couldn't help but feel a pang of frustration as Homelander seemed to buy into Sage's explanation so easily. It seemed like she had him wrapped around her little finger.
“I see, things like this happens, just keep it professional, ladies, okay?”
Sage shot you a quick, victorious look, smug knowing her sweet words to him had prevailed, again.
Disappointment flooding through your veins. It infuriated you how easily Homelander seemed to believe blindly in to Sage's words. You tried to maintain a neutral expression. But you won't have another opportunity like this to assert your dominance, you have to think of something quickly. Sage sure is smart, but you can be really sly.
You pretended to shrug nonchalantly, even though inside you were seething with anger. But you weren't done yet.
You locked eyes with Homelander, ensuring he was listening to you. And then you spoke, your voice dripping with feigned concern.
“It’s true, it wasn’t a big deal. But there’s one thing that concerns me, Homelander. May I be honest with you?”
He tilted his head slightly, curiosity piqued. “You've to.”
“I felt a bit insecure lately and I was wondering...If I should save Sage from poisoning or me from falling from a building. Who would you save?”
Your question comes like an unexpected bolt of lightning, without anyone being able to foresee it or understand its real intention. You cross your arms over your chest and walk around the room slowly, waiting for a response.
He's is taken aback by your question, and the room falls silent. Sage glanced at you quickly, an unexpected flicker of worry in her eyes.
Homelander's eyes follow you as you walk around the room. He's quiet for a few moments, considering the weight of your words before answering.
“Why should I choose, I can save both without effort, you know that.” he finally responds, a slight smile tugging at the corner of his lips.
Your lips curled into a smirk - the answer is far from satisfactory.
“Of course, but let's say you can only choose one.” you persist, your voice steady. “Who would it be?”
His expression unreadable. He's definitely taken off guard by your insistence, and you can see a hint of annoyance starting to form underneath the surface.
“There are too many factors to consider, I can't just say one random name. Fuck, you and your stupid questions...”
Sage looks down at the cup of chamomile tea she was drinking a few minutes ago, and for a second the fear of having been poisoned actually makes her shiver.
“And that's why I'm here to listen all of your thoughts about.” you smile at him once again, hiding something dark behind your kind tone.
Homelander sighs, finally realizing you won’t back down. He crosses his arms, staring at you with slight irritation.
“Fine. Let's say, If I had to choose, I'd likely save Sage first.”
Sage's head snapped up upon hearing his decision, and her eyes widened in surprise. But you answer him carefully, still smiling.
“Are you sure about that?”
“I mean, you're more resistant than her, you wouldn't really die falling from a building. While Sage body is totally human, he would certainly die without an antidote for the poison.”
Your smirk widens, you expected this.
“There, happy now? I solve your fucking riddle.”
You quickly turn away from the conversation and casually walk over towards the large window you know is behind Sage's seat. Acting as if you were admiring the view outside, you casually reach for the handle and pull the window open. The gust of wind that blows in is strong enough to be unexpected, the documents on the table rattle, and the curtains wave violently.
Sage's hand involuntarily releases her cup of tea, and as it hits the floor and the liquid splashes in her direction, a look of panic and realization flashed across her face.
She quickly rises from her seat, her body shaking subtly, trying to play it off as if it was just a simple accident. But anyone can see the flicker of panic behind her eyes. The liquid seeps into the carpet, staining it a dark brown.
“You— Ophera what have you done to my tea?!”
Homelander's eyes narrow, his attention suddenly diverted from the ongoing conversation.
You feign surprise, tilting your head to the side innocently. “Me? Nothing.”
“Bullshit!” Sage points a finger at you, a mixture of shock and fury on her face. She starts to feel strange, she feels dizzy and her legs are shaking.
You turn back to the large open window, the strong gust of wind causing your hair to flutter and the hem of your uniform to flutter. As you look outside, you subtly step back, closer and closer to the edge, the tips of your feet barely holding onto the edge of the window frame.
“What the hell are you doing Ophera?” he say, his voice sharp. “Get away from the window, where has your fear of great heights gone?”
Your eyes flick toward Homelander, a sly smile playing on your lips as you continue to stand dangerously close to the open window, your words dripping with a hint of manipulation.
“Well, I guess now you finally have a real opportunity to choose, love.”
A moment of silence hangs in the air as they're taken off guard by your audacity. Suddenly, without any warning, you lean back, and with a graceful leap, you launch yourself out of the window.
Homelander's heart skips a beat.
“No…No, don't—” he exclaimed desperately, his body moving on instinct.
The wind immediately engulfs you as the ground rapidly comes closer and closer. You feel the adrenaline pumping through your veins, looking at the blue sky, the thrill of the freefall mixing with the intense rush of the air hitting your back.
In an instant, a blur of red and blue rushes towards you as Homelander flies out, he flies towards you at superhuman speed shattering the glass of the other windows. He moves closing the distance between you and him in mere seconds.
From the window, Sage leans out, looking at you both with disbelief. Her eyes widened, and her mouth hangs open, speechless at the turn of events.
Homelander catches you mid-air, wrapping his arms around you, the wind still rushes around you both. You can feel his hands shaking a bit as he holds you.
You look up at him, a cheeky smirk dancing on your lips. A breathless laugh escapes you, the adrenaline still pumping through your veins. Your heart pounds, and a sense of exhilaration washes over you. The suddenness of your action still hangs in the air, and his surprise is evident in his eyes.
“Ops, I guess you picked me.”
Homelander huffs, his grip on you slightly loosening, relaxing, floating in air with you. He shakes his head, relief and frustration clear on his face.
“You're out of your goddamn mind woman.”
“Maybe I am. But, at least you still care enough to save me.” you chuckle softly, enjoying the moment of his attention.
He rolls his eyes, but you can see a smile on his lips and he's slowly moving in the hair to coming back inside the Tower.
You reach out to caress his face gently, your touch tender against his skin. Your hand trail over his jaw, feeling the slight stubble beneath your fingertips. Your other hand still grips onto the fabric of his suit, holding onto him.
“Y'know...I thought Sage brainwashed you into choosing her over me, but I'm happy to see that's not the case.”
His expression softens a little, his eyes meeting yours.
“Believe me, I think she tried. But she didn’t brainwash me at all.” he grumbles, his voice low. “I’m not that easy to control. You should know that..”
“I know you're far from being easy to control. You’re too stubborn and prideful for that.”
He huffs again, with his bold smirk on his lips. “You’re quite stubborn too, maybe more than me. Just look at your little stunt back there.”
As he lands back inside the room with you in his arms, the scene is a little chaotic. He takes a moment to check you are okay, before his eyes land on Sage, who is now passed out on the floor.
“Was really necessary to poison her? Despite your jealousy he was an excellent strategy member to the team.” he say, raising an eyebrow at you.
“Relax. She's not dead. There wasn't a single drop of poison or anything in her tea.” you look down at Sage's unconscious body, lying motionless on the floor, and a small, satisfied smile lifts the corners of your lips.
“Then why the hell is she passed out?” he asks, puzzled.
You kneel down next to her and tilt your head to the side as you examine her unconscious form. The feeling of triumph washes over you, knowing that you managed to manipulate her fear and doubt to your advantage.
“With a brain like hers, mental deceptions are more effective than anything else. It was enough for me to convince her that she had been poisoned and goodnight little sunshine.”
He lets out a low whistle, impressed by the simplicity of your tactic.
“Damn. You really know how to mess with people's heads.”
There's admiration in his voice. An admiration for you that you can still wear like a medal.
“But you really had to prove a point in such a dramatic manner, huh?”
You stand back up, brushing off your uniform and looking at Homelander with a smug smile.
“I had to do something to prove to her, and you, who your favourite really was.”
-------
Hope you like it! I will calmly continue to write about him based on your ask box requests, I will not leave anyone unsatisfied, I promise <3
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doctorbitchcrxft · 1 month
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What Is and What Never Should Be | Supernatural Series Rewrite | Dean Winchester x Fem!Reader
Pairing: Dean Winchester x Fem!Reader (Eventual ? ;) )
Warnings: Dean's an alcoholic dick, coping with trauma from a sexual assault, mentions of parental abuse, mentions of suicide but like not really cause it’s in a dream, canon violence, canon gore (take care of yourselves, as always. Love you guys.)
Word Count: 5281
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About two weeks had passed since you’d left Deacon’s prison. You were convinced it was the hardest two weeks of your life. You couldn’t quite decide if you wanted Dean hugging you all the time, or if you never wanted anyone to touch you again. It felt like every time you looked in the mirror, you were in that disheveled prison guard outfit again, tears streaming down your face with fresh scrapes trailing down your arm. You felt like you were never going to leave the prison’s parking lot.
It definitely didn’t help that you were also having to deal with being fugitives simultaneously. Sam and Dean were waiting for you back at the motel. You put the two of them on a strict lockdown given their mugshots would be everywhere, and the feds hadn’t seemed to find a clear enough image of you to post yours. You drove the Impala around the area of your newest hunt searching for a potential location the victims could have been brought to while the boys researched back in their motel room. 
You knew Dean could tell you were pulling away from him, and you knew it was hurting him. You didn’t want to, but you couldn’t let him in right now. You didn’t want to burden him with your problems given Sam was supposed to be the main concern right now and evading federal agents was a huge priority. You needed to deal with your issues in silence in order to keep yourself from completely breaking down in front of the boys and pulling focus away from what you believed were more pressing issues.
Your phone rang and broke you out of your thoughts. It was Sam’s number. “Hello?” you said into the phone.
“Hey. Got you on speaker,” he replied. “There’s a cop car outside.”
“You think it’s for us?” you questioned.
“I don't know.”
“I don't see how,” Dean jumped in, his voice a little distant. “I mean we ditched the plates, the credit cards.”
Sam breathed out suddenly. “They're leaving. False alarm.”
“Well, see. Nothing to worry about,” Dean jested.
“Yeah, being fugitives? Friggin’ dance party,” Sam deadpanned.
“Hey, man, chicks dig the danger vibe,” Dean commented.
You scoffed. “Got anything yet?” you asked the boys.
“Just one thing. I'm pretty sure of it now. We're hunting a Djinn,” Sam answered.
“Really? How do you know?” you questioned.
“A freaking genie?” Dean asked simultaneously. “What? You think these suckers can really grant wishes?”
“I don’t know,” Sam said. “I guess they're powerful enough. But not exactly like Barbara Eden in harem pants. I mean, Djinn have been feeding off people for centuries. They're all over the Quran.”
“And where do these guys shack up?” you asked. 
“Ruins usually. Uh, bigger the better; more places to hide,” Sam replied.
Something struck you. “Y’know, I think I saw a place a couple miles back. I'm gonna go check it out.”
“Hell no, (Y/N),” Dean stated, voice suddenly much closer to the phone. “You’re not goin’ without us.”
“Dean, I’ll be fine. I’m sure it’s nothing. I just wanna take a look around,” you argued. 
“I’ll call you guys when I’m headed back.” Despite the voices of the Winchesters protesting, you hung up the phone and turned the Impala around. 
Minutes later, you came upon a decaying factory. Doors squeaked on their hinges as you pushed through them and decades-old papers crunched beneath your feet like fallen leaves. Everything seemed very empty and very abandoned, but you weren’t quite convinced. You headed deeper into the factory past several offices with smashed windows on their doors and blinds hanging crookedly. 
Suddenly, something grabbed you and pinned you to the wall behind you. You dropped the flashlight you were holding as the Djinn pinned your hand above your head. You got a clear look at the monster in front of you; a bald man with curling blue tattoos detailing his face and body. You struggled against him, trying to get your knife through his chest with your free hand, but he pinned that one as well. The eyes before you began to glow an electric blue, and your entire body went numb.
*** The next time you woke up, you were alone in a comfortable bed. You jerked up, turned on the lamp next to you, and took in the room around you. There were scrubs tossed on the back of a rocking chair in the corner of the room and a picture of you and Dean hung on the far wall. 
‘What the fu—’ you thought. 
Suddenly, a shirtless Dean entered the room wearing sweatpants hanging low on his hips. “Hey, sweetheart.”
“Dean!” you exclaimed. “What the fuck is goin’ on?”
He eyed you strangely and snorted. “Wha— What do you mean?”
“Where are we?” you asked.
Dean paused, still standing in the doorway and taken aback. “Uh, our house?”
“What?” you questioned.
“Babe, are you feeling okay?” he questioned, sitting on the bed next to you. “I knew your shift at the hospital was bad, but—”
“Wait, what? I don’t work in a hospital, I was hunting a Djinn—” 
Dean cut you off. “You were probably just having a bad dream, sweetheart. Let’s go back to bed, okay?”
You weren’t quite sure what Dean was talking about or if this was even Dean. Maybe  he’d been possessed, maybe you’d been— ‘Wait,’ you thought. ‘The Djinn. Maybe he did this to me.’
Dean climbed into bed next to you, and you noticed he wasn’t wearing the amulet he quite literally never took off. You were apparently eyeing him strangely, because he chuckled, “What?”
“Nothing,” you shook your head, “Just, uh— where’s your necklace?”
Dean laughed, almost sounding relieved. “Oh, I took it off to shower.” He put a silver chain with dog tags hanging from it around his neck. He opened his arm for you to settle into. 
Hesitantly, you laid down on Dean’s chest. You didn’t get much sleep the remainder of that night, though; incredibly uneasy about what was going on around you. 
Around three in the morning, you slipped out of Dean’s arms and began to explore the house around you. You peeked through the bedroom window to see a neighborhood outside that screamed Middle America. You crept down the hallway to the living room and kitchen area. 
Along the walls of the den, there were photos hanging of what looked like you as a teenager and a child, but you couldn’t be sure. You didn’t think photos of you existed of that time in your life. And if they did exist, they definitely were not of you at your third birthday with a pink frilly party hat stuffing cake in your face or of you in a cap and gown graduating high school and college. The next thing that caught your eye was a picture of you hugging Steven tightly. Your hand flew to your mouth at the sight. However, it wasn’t your Steven. This one was older and a lot happier than the Steven you once knew. 
Then, there were pictures of you and your mother. Your father was nowhere to be seen, much to your surprise. You nearly wept at the sight of your mom. Then, there were pictures of a young Sam and Dean. One was Dean hugging his mother. He looked much older than four which was the age you knew his mother died at. 
“Holy shit,” you breathed out. 
You took out your phone and checked the time. You considered for a moment, but decided to call Sam figuring he would likely be up soon anyway. 
“Sam?” you asked when the call was answered. 
“(Y/N)?” His voice sounded raspy and tired. 
“Hey, yeah, what the hell’s goin’ on, man?” you demanded.
“(Y/N), what are you—”
“Oh, god, not you, too.” You hung up the phone and ran a hand through your hair. No one but you seemed to understand that this wasn’t right. You noticed something laying on the coffee table at your feet. An envelope addressed to you with Lawrence, Kansas written on one of the address lines. 
“Lawrence? Why the fuck am I in Lawrence?” you breathed out. 
You noticed a computer sitting a distance away and immediately hurried to it. You typed in your password; no luck. You tried Sam’s password for his and Dean’s shared laptop; no luck either. Frustrated, you sat back in the desk chair. You weren’t sure where the idea came from, but you suddenly had the thought to type in Steven’s name and birthday. Somehow, it worked. You remembered how that was your original idea for a computer password when you first bought yourself a laptop in your real life, but the reminder of Steven was too painful to do so. 
You then set to work researching the Djinn. You learned that they’re not so much genies as they are wielders of godlike power. They could alter reality to their whims however they want in the past, present, and future. 
Then, the thought hit you. ‘What if this is just my life now? What if I never see my Dean again? Am I even a hunter wherever this is?’ Your breath hitched as you realized something else. ‘Was I ever raped? Are my parents alive? Where’s Stevie?’
You typed “whitepages” into the search bar and put in your father’s full name; no results. You tried your mother’s and actually got a hit. She lived in Lawrence, too. 
‘What the fuck?’
You then tried Steven’s. Surprisingly, his name generated results, too. He also lived in Lawrence. 
You hurriedly wrote their addresses down on a sticky note beside you on the desk. When you returned to your room, it was around five in the morning. Creeping around the room, you discovered the clothes in your closet were nothing like you wore in the real world: flowing skirts, cardigans, and lots of different colored scrubs. You almost smiled at the sight of the clothes hanging in your closet. 
‘In another life, I definitely would’ve worn all this,’ you thought. You’d always wanted Carrie Bradshaw’s closet; Sex and the City was one of your guilty pleasure shows in the real world.
Your outfit of choice consisted of a pair of low-rise jeans, a halter top with a plunging neckline, and… ‘Oh.’ The only shoes this version of you had in her closet were heels. Admittedly, you’d never been great at wearing them, but always wanted to try. And so, you did. 
Dean still slept peacefully, and you carefully clacked your heels back down the hallway. You headed outside to find the Impala in the driveway, and for that, you were grateful. 
“Hey, sweet girl,” you grinned. You remembered seeing car keys on a hook next to the door of the house and quickly grabbed them. You popped open the trunk of the Impala secretly hoping to find something useful in it. However, old playboy magazines and paper cups were all you found.
‘Ew, Dean, clean out your car.’
You moved around to the driver’s side of the car. Before you could sit down in it, though, something caught your eye. A girl with a gaunt face and billowing white clothing was standing across the street on one of the neighbor’s lawns. A car blew past, and she was suddenly gone. 
***
You rolled to a stop in front of the first address you had written down: your mother’s. You tried to keep your composure as you walked up to her front door. Hesitantly, you rapped your knuckles against it. 
The door opened to reveal your beautiful mother who you’d missed so much. She looked a little older than she did the last time you saw her, and it was all you could do to keep yourself from throwing your arms around her.
“Mom?” you breathed out.
“What is it, hon?” she asked. “C’mon, come inside.”
The sound of her voice made tears spring to your eyes. You followed her into the living room where pictures of you and Steven lined the walls between crucifixes.
“Hey, Mom?” you started. “What song did you sing to me before you used to put me to bed?”
She looked confused, but humored you anyway. “The, uh, ‘The Long to Be’ song by the Carpenters.”
You smiled, partially in relief that this seemed to really be her and not just a figment of your imagination and partially at the fact that she knew. You rushed to her and hugged her tightly. Your mother seemed taken aback once more, but didn’t say anything to let on that she was.
“You okay? Everything alright with Dean?” your mother asked you. 
“Oh, yeah, everything’s— everything’s great. Just, uh, it was a rough day at the hospital, ‘s all,” you said.
“How’s the garage?” 
You tilted your head. “The garage?”
She seemed confused, too. “Dean’s? How’s work going for him?”
“Oh, oh. The garage, of course,” you laughed awkwardly. ‘Smooth, (Y/N),’ you mentally berated yourself. “Yeah, it’s fine, it’s great.”
“Really? Last time we talked, he was too busy drinking to focus on fixing a car,” she said.
You felt stunned. The Dean you knew was bordering on becoming an alcoholic, sure, but he wouldn’t let that get in the way of his job.
“Baby, I’m glad to see you, but why are you here at six in the morning?” your mom questioned.
“I just— I just couldn’t sleep. Needed to see my mom,” you replied. It was a half-truthful response.
Your mother offered a small, thoughtful smile. “Oh,” she suddenly said. “What time are you and Dean going to dinner tonight?”
You tilted your head. “Uh—”
“For Mary’s birthday?” she prompted. 
“Oh, oh,” you said. “Right.”
“Did he not tell you?” she asked. “(Y/N), I’ve been telling you that boy isn’t right for you for a while now.”
“Mom—” you protested.
“No, (Y/N). You’re a fantastic nurse. You’re dating a drunkard mechanic. Why couldn’t you have dated Sam?”
“Ew, mom, no. Sam’s my best friend,” you said.
She seemed stunned. “What? That’s new. Last we talked, you hadn’t heard from Sam in months. Neither had Dean.”
It was your turn for your eyes to widen. “Right, right, yeah. Sorry. I’m just—”
“Have you been drinking? Dean’s rubbing off on you, (Y/N). You should have listened to me when I warned you about him,” your mother sighed. 
“Jesus, Mom—”
“Don’t take his name in vain!” she scolded.
You scoffed. “I forgot that you’re like this.” You crossed your arms and turned away from her. 
“Like what?” your mother pressed, voice rising. 
“So incredibly judgmental of me. I’ve never been good enough for you or Dad, Mom!”
“How dare you bring up your father!” your mother cut you off.
“What?!”
“Wow, you really are drunk, (Y/N),” she replied. “He’s been dead almost your whole life. You barely even knew him. How could you say that about him?”
You felt like you’d been punched in the chest. ‘So that means he never hit us.’ “Mom, I’m sorry, I didn’t—”
“Just leave, (Y/N). Please. I’ll call you tomorrow,” she sighed.
You turned and slammed the door behind you. You sat in the Impala with your head on the steering wheel just trying to process everything that was going on. Even in this fantasy land or new reality or wherever this place was, your mother was harshly critical of you. Granted, you’d rather her harshly criticize you and be alive than dead, but this version of your mother perfectly mirrored the true version of her. It truly freaked you out. 
‘Well, scratch that off the list, I guess,’ you thought.
***
You hesitantly knocked on the door of your little brother’s home. 
“(Y/N)?” he asked upon opening the door.
Tears sprang to your eyes. “Steve?” you breathed out.
“(Y/N), what’s wrong?” he asked.
You smiled as a tear slipped down your cheek. “Uh, just a hard day at work ‘s all,” you replied. You threw yourself into his arms; a hug he responded to immediately. 
“Hey, seriously, what happened?” he asked when you pulled away. “Was it Dean again? The hospital never gets to you like that.”
“Wait, what? No,” you shook your head. “Why does everybody keep saying he treats me poorly?”
Steven looked at you as if it was obvious. “Uh, ‘cause he does. He’s an alcoholic playboy asshole that you’re way too good for.”
“What?!” you questioned. “No, he isn’t.”
He sighed. “Listen, (Y/N), I don’t wanna keep having this fight with you.”
“Yeah, me neither,” you replied. You stopped for a moment. “Stevie, I’m really happy to see you.”
He chuckled. “Yeah, I’m glad to see you, too.”
A small voice piped up from behind your brother. “Daddy?”
Steven stepped back to reveal a staggering toddler in pigtails. He picked her up and grinned down at her. “What’s up, kiddo?”
‘He’s a dad?’ Your shock only increased, and you smiled at the sight of them interacting. Another tear slipped down your cheek. 
“Why’s Minnie crying?” the toddler asked her father.
You grinned. “She calls me ‘Minnie’?” 
Steven nodded. “Yeah, just like I used to.”
You laughed. “Can I hold her?”
“Duh,” he replied, handing his daughter to you.
“Hi, sweet girl,” you grinned down at her. She tugged on the ends of your hair, babbling happily and singing to herself.
“Look, Minnie, I braid.” The toddler held up a now twisted, knotted mess of your hair. 
You smiled at her. “Awesome job, angel.” 
You sat on the floor playing with your niece and Steven for hours until your phone rang.
“Hey, (Y/N), where ya been?” Dean’s voice came from the other line.
“Steven’s,” you replied. “Why, what’s up?”
“We gotta be at my mom’s in an hour. Meet me there?” he asked.
*** You met Dean on the steps of his mother’s house. 
“Hey, sweetheart,” he grinned, pecking your lips. 
Suddenly, a voice came from behind you. “Seriously, Dean?”
“Sam!” you exclaimed, turning around to give him an enthusiastic hug. He hesitated to return it, and the woman next to him cleared her throat. You released him to come face to face with Jessica, a woman you’d only seen in pictures. 
“Hey, Jess,” you said, the name feeling strange on your tongue. You hugged her as well, and she awkwardly laughed.
“Hi, (Y/N),” she said. 
You then noticed the awkward distance between the two brothers and the bags Sam was lugging out of the trunk of the taxi in front of you. 
“Where'd you guys come from?” you asked.
“We just flew in from... Califor—”
“California! Stanford and everything. Right, sorry,” you laughed. “I’m really not with it today.”
Sam nodded somewhat disapprovingly. “I can see that.” He motioned to the beer in Dean’s hand. “I see you started off Mom's birthday with a bang, as usual.”
“Sam—” Dean warned.
Your heart was breaking at the awkward tension between two brothers who were otherwise incredibly close friends. You couldn’t believe there was a universe where Sam and Dean weren’t, well, Sam and Dean.
***
The restaurant you sat in next to Dean was stuffy. Sam and Jessica were dressed equally as stuffy. Nothing felt right at this moment. You were suddenly reminded of the reason why you were here, and that you needed to figure out how to help yourself get out of here. 
“Wow, that... looks awesome,” Dean said, referring to the plate of steak and asparagus that had been placed in front of him.
Sam raised his glass. “All right. To Mom. Happy birthday.”
“Happy birthday,” you, Dean, and Jessica said in unison.
“Thank you,” Mary replied, clinking her glass against yours.
You watched Sam and Jessica peck each other on the lips and you smiled fondly. 
“I was really worried about you last night,” Dean told you.
“Oh, I'm… I'm good. I'm really good,” you nodded.
“For some reason, I don’t believe you,” he smirked. “I know a few ways I can make that a reality, though.”
You recoiled at that comment, slightly dumbfounded by how correct Steven had been about Dean’s behavior in this realm.
“Jess and I actually have another surprise for Mom's birthday. Ah,” Sam turned to Jessica, “you wanna tell 'em?”
“They're your family,” she laughed.
“What? Tell me what?” Mary asked excitedly.
Sam held up Jessica’s left hand to reveal an engagement ring. You laughed happily in surprise. “Holy shit! That’s amazing!” You got up and hugged Sam happily before hugging Jessica. “Congratulations!” you told them.
“I just wish your dad was here,” Mary told Sam.
You suddenly realized John was missing. You searched Sam’s face, whose disappointment mirrored his mother’s.
Dean and Sam awkwardly shook hands which hurt your heart a little to see. Just behind them, though, you noticed the girl from earlier. Her white, flowing clothing was much filthier and torn this time. You brushed past Sam and headed toward the girl, pushing past people mingling in between you and the haunting figure. As you pushed past the final woman, the girl was gone.
Confused, you turned back around to see the equally weirded-out faces of the Winchester family. 
Sheepishly, you grinned and walked back over to them.
*** “You got somethin’ we need to talk about?” Dean asked you. He’d been completely silent since dinner up until this moment. He downed a beer in the kitchen before turning to you. 
“What?” you asked.
“Back there with Sam. What’s going on with you two?” Dean asked. “In fact, you’ve been acting really weird the past two days. There somethin’ you wanna tell me?”
You scoffed. “Dean, I’m not fucking your brother. Look, I’m not feeling like myself right now. ‘S all.”
“Yeah, I can tell,” Dean responded mockingly.
“Dude, why are you being such a dick?” you questioned.
“Oh, so we just call each other ‘dude’ now?” he argued.
“Listen, I’m really not enjoying this attitude, okay?” you responded.
Dean cut you off. “I’m not enjoying yours, either. What happened to the sweet little nurse I married?”
“Jesus, we’re married?” you questioned before you could help yourself. 
“(Y/N), what the hell?” Dean replied, his confusion seeming to grow by the minute. 
“I think I’m just… overly tired. I’m gonna… sleep out here tonight,” you said.
Dean scoffed. “Since when are you the childish one?”
“I’m not being childish, Dean, I just wanna sleep on the couch tonight, okay?” you hissed.
“Fine.” He left the room and returned to the bedroom the two of you apparently shared. You heard the door slam a moment later, and you flinched. You settled to the couch and pulled a blanket over yourself. You clicked on the television and began clicking through the channels. Something on the news caught your attention.
“And today marks the anniversary of the crash of United Britannia Flight 424,” the reporter began.
“What the—” you breathed out. 
“Indianapolis residents held a candlelight vigil in memory of the hundred and eight people who lost their lives—”
Your throat clenched. “No, no. We stopped that crash.”
Panicked, you moved to your computer. Every hunt you checked had apparently never happened. “Nine Children Comatose” was the headline describing a “mystery illness” that had swept Dane County Hospital. Then, the brutal homicides from the clown killer after John died. And Taylor from the closing-down-Hoodoo-hotel case had drowned in the hotel pool. As you looked out the front window, you saw the same woman you’d seen twice already flash by the window. You turned around to see several female corpses hanging around you, and you nearly screamed out in surprise. Then, that same woman again flickering in front of you.
This twisted world was completely shocking even you, an experienced hunter. Your mind raced, but you knew what you had to do. A picture of your dad holding you as a baby on the wall of your house caught your attention.
“I’m sorry you’re not here, Dad,” you murmured. “And I know what I need to do. I’m gonna hunt this son of a bitch, but… I don’t know. Stevie’s happy. Mom’s… Mom. And I just— Why do we always have to be the ones to sacrifice something? A part of me is happy to do it, and this is proof that I could never have this. But it’s just… I don’t know. I know you’re tellin’ me to stop whinin’ and just get it done. I’ll make you proud. I promise.”
And with that, you grabbed a silver knife from your china cabinet and headed out to the Impala. You managed to steal lamb’s blood from a butcher’s shop and headed to the factory you’d last seen the Djinn at. 
***
Hours later, you arrived at the factory in Illinois. Running on pure adrenaline, you headed inside. You moved your flashlight around to illuminate different parts of the factory, and you ignored your phone as it began to ring in your back pocket. The ringing silenced, and then rang again. Without thinking, you lifted your phone over your head and slammed it into the ground, shattering and silencing it completely.
Then, you came across a big store room with the same bodies you’d seen hanging in your living room strung up around it. Next, you noticed the woman you’d been seeing all along. She seemed close to death; her cheeks sallow, face pale, and body hanging limply. 
“It’s her,” you breathed out.
Suddenly, you saw the Djinn coming around the corner. You ducked into the shadows as the woman began to cry. “Where's my dad? I won't tell—” she suddenly cut herself off. “Don't. Where's my dad?”
“Sleep,” you heard a soothing male voice say. “Sleep.”
You then saw the woman’s body completely relax, and the Djinn began to drink from the blood bag next to where she was hanging. 
‘So that’s what it does,’ you realized. ‘It doesn’t grant you a wish, it just makes you think it has.’ As the Djinn disappeared, you continued to think. ‘What if I'm like her? What if I'm tied up in here some place? What if all this is in my head?’ You walked up to the woman. “I mean it could, you know, maybe it gives us some kind of supernatural acid, and then just feeds on us slow.’ You nearly scoffed audibly. ‘So, she’s not a spirit, she’s a flash of reality. I’m catatonic. Fucking great.’
Then, you remembered an old wives’ tale. “Listen to me, motherfucker!” you called into the darkness. “I’m gonna slit my fucking throat! I die in a dream, I wake up, right! Come and get me, I dare you!”
“Wait!” Dean’s voice suddenly called. He walked into the room. 
“Why'd you have to keep digging?” Sam asked.“Why couldn't you have left well enough alone? You were happy.”
Your mother walked up to you and put a hand to your cheek. “Put the knife down, honey.”
“You're not real,” you said, tears forming in your eyes. “None of it is.”
“It doesn't matter. It's still better than anything you had,” Steven replied, holding his daughter. 
“What?” you breathed.
“It's everything you want. C’mon, let’s go home,” Dean pleaded. 
“I'll die,” you argued, voice breaking. “The Djinn 'll drain the life out of me in a couple of days.”
“But in here, with us, it'll feel like years. Like a lifetime,” your mother said. “I promise.” She put her hand to your cheek and stroked it with her thumb. “No more pain. Or fear. Just love and comfort. And safety. (Y/N), stay with us. Get some rest.”
“You and Dean don't have to worry about Sam anymore,” Jessica said. “You get to watch him live a full life.”
Dean walked up to you and kissed you fiercely. “We can have a future together. Have our own family. I love you, sweetheart. Please.”
“Why is it our job to save everyone? Haven't we done enough?” Sam tried. “I'm begging you. Give me the knife.”
You looked over to Steven, your lip quivering as you sobbed. “I’m sorry.” You slashed your throat with the knife, and the world went white once more. 
***
“(Y/N)!” you heard someone yelling. “Sweetheart, wake up. (Y/N)!”
‘Dean.’
“Oh, God. Come on,” you heard Sam murmuring. “Hey. Wake up. Wake up, damn it!”
You began to roll your head a little, and your eyes could finally open. “Hey, guys.”
“Jesus, (Y/N),” Dean sighed. “I thought I lost you for a second.” 
One of the two boys yanked out the IV in your arm. 
“You almost did,” you joked half-heartedly.
“Oh, god,” Dean muttered, giving you a once-over. “Let's get you down.”
You winced as the boys helped you down, but you suddenly saw a pair of blue eyes glowing behind the boys. “Boys!”
Sam wheeled around, going at the Djinn with the knife. Dean immediately tried to get you away from the scene and set you down a distance away from the scene. “Stay here!” he ordered.
“Don’t have much of a choice, do I,” you groaned as Dean turned to help his brother. Several yelps and groans later, the two boys staggered over to you after having killed the Djinn. You pushed yourself off the floor, wincing, and immediately moved over to the girl you’d been seeing in your sleep. “She's still alive!” you called to the boys upon feeling a pulse in her neck. 
The two Winchesters helped you cut her down and get her out of the factory to a hospital. 
***
Upon your return to the motel, you found out from the hospital that she was alive and stable. There was a solid chance the girl would pull through.
“How 'bout you? You all right?” Sam asked you.
“Yeah, I’m fine, guys,” you said. “I’m great, actually. I’m just— I’m just glad to be back here again.”
“What was it like?” Dean asked.
“Oh, you were a complete dick,” you replied.
Dean chuckled. “Sounds about right.”
“And Sam— Sam you were such a freak,” you said. “All stuffy and Stanford-y.” You paused for a moment. “But, uh, you guys were really breakin’ my heart, honestly. You couldn’t get along to save your life.”
“I thought it was supposed to be this perfect fantasy,” Sam said.
“Trust me, it wasn’t,” you replied. “I know we’ve lost a lot, but, uh, I wouldn’t trade any of this for the world. Even seeing Stevie again, I— it just wasn’t right. I felt like more of a freak there than I do here. I, uh, I wished what happened to me at the prison never had, but the truth is, that’s always gonna be with me. I can’t just… get rid of it. Nothing can. And that’s not okay, but I’ll learn to live with it.” 
You left the boys to sit with your words and moved to the bathroom. When you looked up at the mirror, an image of you with your mussed-up hair and guard uniform on flashed before you. You ignored the fresh-looking scrapes on your arm and blood streaking down them and shut your eyes. When you opened them once more, you were back to looking at your sunken face and tired eyes. 
Dealing with this was hell. Every day felt like a struggle since what happened to you. But deep down, if you were honest with yourself, you would take dealing with all this with your two boys over your white-picket-fence, Djinn-dream-life any day.
Series Rewrite Taglist: @polireader @brightlilith @atcamillanorrman @jrizzelle @insomnia-bookworm @procrastination20 @mrs-liebgott @djs8891 @tiggytaylor @staple-your-mouth @jesstherebel @rach5ive @strawberrykiwisdogog @bruhidkjustwannaread @mxltifxnd0m @sunshine-on-marz @big-ol-boat @mgchaser @capncrankle @chervbs @simpingdeadcharacters @nesnejwritings @stillhere197 @tearsforhan @take-it-on-the-run @iloveyou2mia @maxinehufflepuffprincess @ohgeehowdigethere @seninjakitey @berarenado @s0urw00lf @princessleahorgana @quarterhorse19 @isla-finke-blog @silverdoragon @karacaroldanvers @gayandfairycore @examishbookwyrm @star-yawnznn @real-sharena-h @fandomloverrr @metalmonki @onlyangel-444 @yu-winchester @benniwiththefanni @daisychaingirl @immagods @missmieux @yoongi-holland @littledebbieinabigworld
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moonselune · 23 days
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bg3 boys w/ a cleric of myrkul tav?? what r they like having tav as a partner and that being tav’s deity, or maybe how they react to finding out??
I can only imagine this happening when it is revealed that Ketheric is Myrkul's chosen and Tav is like "what a faker" like that meme when somebody is wearing a popular band shirt and someone is like "yeah you like this band well name three of their songs - and not the popular ones"
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Gale:
Gale was never one to shy away from asking questions. His curiosity was insatiable, a hunger for knowledge that was as much a part of him as his magic. It was one of the things you loved most about him. But today, as you sat together in the quiet of your shared quarters, you realized that your next revelation would surely set that curiosity ablaze.
You’d been planning on telling him for a while now, but the moment never seemed right. Gale was a man of light and arcane wonders, and you…well, you walked a path most would fear to tread. But you knew Gale, and despite any misgivings, you trusted in his understanding.
The moment arrived when you were alone, with the evening shadows casting long fingers across the room. You were removing your armor, the quiet routine comforting in its simplicity, when Gale’s eyes caught on something he hadn’t seen before: a small, intricately crafted holy symbol nestled against your chest. The bone-white skull, framed by dark triangle, was unmistakable.
“Myrkul?” he said, the word hanging in the air between you. His tone was a mix of surprise, intrigue, and something you couldn’t quite place. “You follow Myrkul?”
You nodded, watching as his brows furrowed, his mind already racing ahead. He stepped closer, his gaze locked on the symbol. “I must admit, this is…unexpected. Myrkul, the Lord of Bones, the Shepherd of Souls. A deity of death, decay, and the inevitable end. And you…you’re his cleric?”
The way he said it wasn’t accusatory, but filled with genuine curiosity. His eyes, alight with questions, darted back and forth as if trying to piece together a puzzle. He paced in front of you, hands gesturing animatedly as he rambled on, caught up in his thoughts.
“This is fascinating! Truly, I’ve read much about the gods, but Myrkul’s followers often remain shrouded in mystery. I’ve always been intrigued by the nature of death—how it can be both feared and revered, a finality and yet a passage to something beyond. But you, my dear, I never would have guessed…”
He paused, looking at you with an intensity that made your heart skip a beat. “What is it about Myrkul that calls to you? Is it the peace in the acceptance of death? The knowledge that all things must end? Or perhaps something else entirely?”
You couldn’t help but smile. Gale’s curiosity was infectious, his mind a whirlwind of thoughts and theories. It was one of the many reasons you’d fallen for him. His ability to see beyond the surface, to seek understanding rather than pass judgment. You reached out, taking his hand in yours, grounding him in the moment.
“It’s all of that,” you began, your voice calm, “and more. Myrkul teaches that death is not something to be feared, but a natural part of the cycle. There’s a peace in knowing that everything has its time, that life and death are intertwined. It’s not about darkness or despair, but about balance.”
Gale’s expression softened as he listened, his hand squeezing yours gently. He seemed to be absorbing your words, turning them over in his mind like a puzzle piece that had finally found its place.
“But isn’t it lonely?” he asked, his voice softer now. “To walk a path where most would shy away, where the end is seen as something to embrace rather than avoid?”
You shook your head, your smile widening. “Not with you by my side.”
Gale blinked, and then a slow, warm smile spread across his face. He let out a soft chuckle, the tension in the room dissolving into something lighter.
“You never cease to amaze me,” he said, pulling you closer into his arms. “Here I thought I knew everything about you, and yet you continue to surprise me.”
You rested your head against his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart. “And you continue to accept me, despite those surprises.”
“Accept you? My dear, I adore you. Every part of you. Even the parts I don’t yet fully understand.” He pressed a kiss to your forehead, his lips lingering as if to seal the moment.
You stayed like that for a while, wrapped in each other’s warmth, until Gale’s curiosity inevitably got the better of him again.
“You must tell me more,” he said, his voice laced with excitement. “About Myrkul, about your beliefs, your rituals… Everything. I want to understand it all.”
You laughed softly, nodding as you looked up at him. “I will. But only if you promise to keep an open mind.”
“Always,” he replied, his eyes twinkling with affection and intrigue. “For you, always.”
─── ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚. ───
Astarion:
When Astarion first found out that you were a cleric of Myrkul, the reaction was instant and unmistakable: he laughed. Not a polite chuckle or a restrained smile, but a full, delighted laugh that echoed through the room.
"You? A cleric of Myrkul?" he exclaimed, still laughing as he leaned back in his chair. His crimson eyes sparkled with amusement as he looked at you. "Oh, darling, that's just too perfect. Of all the gods you could have chosen, you go for the Lord of Bones? How delightfully grim."
You couldn't help but smile at his reaction, despite the small twinge of uncertainty in your chest. Astarion was nothing if not unpredictable, and while his laughter was playful, you couldn't quite gauge his true feelings on the matter. But as he calmed down, his expression softened, and he reached out to take your hand.
"Honestly, my dear," he said, his voice lowering to a more sincere tone, "I couldn't care less if you worshipped a rock, let alone Myrkul. It's… charming, in its own way. Fitting, even. You, with your endless compassion and stubborn sense of duty, serving the god of death and decay. It's almost poetic."
You felt a wave of relief wash over you at his words. It was typical Astarion, to mask his acceptance with teasing, but you knew him well enough by now to recognize the affection behind the jest. He truly didn't mind—if anything, he seemed more amused than anything else.
But Astarion, being who he was, couldn't let the opportunity for mischief pass by.
One day, while you were traveling together through a dense, eerie forest, you came across a small clearing. The ground was littered with the bones of long-dead creatures—birds, by the looks of them. Astarion's sharp eyes caught sight of them immediately, and he couldn't resist.
"Oh, look what we have here!" he called out, his voice dripping with mock reverence. He knelt down, carefully picking up a delicate bird skull between his fingers, holding it up for you to see. "A sign from your beloved Lord of Bones, perhaps? Surely, this is some sort of divine message."
You rolled your eyes at him, unable to suppress a smile. "Astarion, really?"
He stood up, cradling the skull in his hands as if it were a priceless artifact. "What? I’m merely showing the proper respect for your deity. Maybe you should say a prayer or two? Thank him for this lovely gift?"
You laughed, shaking your head as you walked over to him. "You’re impossible."
He grinned, that mischievous spark in his eyes even brighter. "Impossible, but endearing, I hope."
"Always," you replied, leaning in to give him a quick kiss, which he eagerly returned. He finally let the bird skull drop back to the ground, his teasing done for the moment.
As you continued on your journey, Astarion would occasionally find other small bones or remnants of dead creatures and make a show of it, always with that playful glint in his eyes. But you knew it was all in good fun. Beneath the teasing and the jokes, Astarion respected you and your choices, no matter how dark or unconventional they might seem.
And as you walked together, hand in hand, you couldn’t help but feel grateful for the way he accepted you, every part of you, without hesitation. Astarion might mock, he might tease, but he did so with a heart that, despite everything, cared deeply for you. And that, in the end, was all that mattered.
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Wyll:
"You're a cleric of Myrkul?" he asks, his voice tinged with disbelief. "I mean, of course, I respect your choices, but... Myrkul? The god of death and decay?"
You nod, sensing his hesitation. "I know it's... unexpected. But Myrkul isn't just about death in the way most people think. It's about the balance, the cycle of life. I’ve always believed that there’s peace in understanding that."
Wyll takes a deep breath, clearly grappling with the news. He gazes at you, searching your eyes for any trace of doubt or malice, but all he finds is the same love and compassion that drew him to you in the first place. Slowly, a smile spreads across his face, though there's still a hint of unease behind it.
"If anyone could find the good in serving such a god, it would be you," he says softly, taking your hands in his. "I don’t fully understand it, but I trust you. And I love you. That won’t change, no matter which deity you follow."
His acceptance brings a wave of relief, and you can’t help but smile back at him. Wyll might have been taken aback, but his love for you is unwavering. Still, you can tell he’s not entirely comfortable with the idea—at least, not yet.
As the days pass, Wyll finds a way to come to terms with your role as a cleric of Myrkul in his own unique way. He’s a man of action, after all, and he starts to notice that your affiliation can be rather... intimidating to others.
It’s not long before he starts to take advantage of this, especially in combat situations.
One evening, as you’re faced with a particularly dangerous group of bandits, Wyll steps forward, his voice booming with confidence.
"I suggest you lot think twice about crossing us," he declares, gesturing to you with a flourish. "You see, my beloved here serves Myrkul himself. That’s right—the Lord of Bones. You know what that means? She could send you straight to his realm without a second thought. So if you value your lives, I’d recommend turning tail and running now."
The bandits exchange uneasy glances, clearly unnerved by the mention of Myrkul. It doesn’t take long for them to back off, retreating into the shadows with a newfound respect for you and Wyll.
As they disappear into the night, Wyll turns to you with a triumphant grin. "Did you see that? They were terrified! I think I’m going to enjoy having the scariest lover around."
You raise an eyebrow at him, amused by his sudden enthusiasm for your dark allegiance. "You’re not scared of me now, are you?"
Wyll shakes his head, stepping closer to you. "Not in the slightest," he says, his tone sincere. "I know your heart, and it’s anything but dark. But if your connection to Myrkul gives our enemies a reason to fear you, I’d say that’s a pretty handy advantage."
Despite his earlier reservations, Wyll seems to have fully embraced the idea of you as a cleric of Myrkul—so much so that he’s even proud of it in a way. There’s a certain thrill in knowing that the love of his life holds such power, and though the path you’ve chosen might be a bit darker than he’s used to, Wyll wouldn’t have it any other way.
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Halsin:
The two of you have always shared a deep connection with nature, and Halsin's admired your reverence for the cycles of life. However, the realization that you serve Myrkul, the Lord of Bones, left Halsin uneasy.
“Myrkul?” Halsin’s voice is low, laced with confusion and concern. “You serve the god of death and decay? This… this feels more akin to the ways of the Shadow Druids than the path of the Circle of the Moon.”
You sigh, feeling the weight of his words. You’ve always known that your faith might be difficult for someone like Halsin to accept, especially given his deep love for life and the natural world. “Halsin, it’s not what you think. Myrkul isn’t just about death—he represents the natural end of all things, the balance that keeps the cycle of life in motion. It’s not about destruction for its own sake, but about understanding and respecting the inevitable.”
Halsin frowns, his gaze searching your face for understanding. “But the Shadow Druids—they twist nature to their will, using death as a weapon. How is this different?”
You can feel the frustration bubbling up inside you, knowing that he’s comparing your faith to something so perverse. “I’m not a Shadow Druid, Halsin. I don’t wield death like a weapon. Myrkul’s teachings are about the acceptance of life’s end, about helping others find peace with it. There’s a serenity in that, a balance.”
He crosses his arms, his expression still troubled. “But how does that align with the life we cherish? The Circle of the Moon teaches us to embrace the wild, to protect the natural order. Myrkul… his followers often stray into darkness.”
You feel your heart tighten at his words, his misunderstanding cutting deeper than you expected. “Are you saying I’ve strayed into darkness, Halsin? That I’m no longer the person you thought I was?”
Halsin’s eyes soften, but the tension between you remains. “No, that’s not what I mean. But this… this path you’ve chosen, it worries me. I’ve seen what happens when death becomes more than just a natural end. It can consume everything.”
Frustrated, you turn away, the pain of his words too much to bear. “I thought you would understand, Halsin. I thought you of all people would see that there’s more to this than just death. But maybe I was wrong.”
With that, you walk away, needing space to clear your mind. The hurt and confusion weigh heavily on you, and you feel a pang of regret as you leave him standing there, knowing how much your faith means to you.
As you reach a quiet spot in the forest, surrounded by the sounds of nature, you feel the tears welling up. You sit down on a fallen log, trying to calm your racing thoughts, when you hear the rustling of leaves behind you. Halsin’s familiar presence soon follows, his steps slow and deliberate.
“I’m sorry,” he says softly, standing a few paces behind you. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was… taken aback. Your faith, it’s something I didn’t fully understand, and I reacted poorly.”
You remain silent, but the anger has already begun to ebb away, replaced by the warmth of his sincerity.
Halsin steps closer, finally sitting down beside you on the log. “What matters most is you. I love you, no matter what path you walk. I see now that I was too quick to judge. Myrkul’s teachings might not be what I would choose, but that doesn’t make them wrong. Perhaps there’s something we can learn from each other.”
You glance at him, seeing the earnestness in his eyes. “You really mean that?”
He nods, reaching out to take your hand in his. “Yes. Myrkul’s ways may be foreign to me, but they’re a part of you. And I want to understand, just as I hope you’ll continue to embrace the life we share together. We don’t have to agree on everything, but we can find common ground.”
A small smile tugs at your lips, and you squeeze his hand. “I’d like that, Halsin. I don’t want this to come between us.”
He pulls you closer, his strong arms wrapping around you in a comforting embrace. “It won’t,” he murmurs into your hair. “Nothing is more important than you. Together, we’ll find a way to balance our beliefs. After all, isn’t balance what nature teaches us?”
You nod, leaning into him, feeling the warmth of his body against yours. “Yes, it is.”
With that, the tension between you melts away, replaced by the familiar bond you share. The argument fades into the background as you sit together in the peace of the forest, knowing that your love for each other is stronger than any difference in belief.
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Hope you guys enjoyed this! Love you all - Seluney xox
If you want to support me in other ways | Help keep this moonmaiden caffeinated x
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babyjakes · 10 months
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in the middle of the night. [blurb.]
〈 disclaimer: this blog posts content not suitable for individuals under the age of 18. minors are strictly prohibited from viewing, sharing, or interacting with this blog. for more information on this blog's commitment to protecting minors, read our full statement here. 〉
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event | kinkmas 2023
prompt | somnophilia
pairing | dark!stepdad!pete brenner x reader
warnings | stepcest (stepdad!pete is sooo sleazy.) soft dark!pete. reader is giving innocent vibes. noncon + somnophilia (reader is asleep.) age gap (reader is college age, pete is 40+.) slight daddy kink (pete refers to himself as such.) nipple play. fingering. oral (f receiving.) forced orgasm. squirting.
word count | 913
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an | this is my first time writing pete brenner so please be nice!! i hope you all enjoy <33 he's so sleeeazzy, i need him :'))) also i'm just making as many taylor references as i can at this point, im not sorry about it lol
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Eyes trailing up your unmoving form, Pete forced himself to swallow down the low groan building in his throat. The pale moonlight pouring in your bedside window was just bright enough to give view to your perfect figure. Taking in the delicate features of your resting face, the older man swore he was laying over a sleeping angel.
He knew what he was doing would be considered wrong by most. But Pete never had too much trouble ignoring his decayed conscience. When the opportunity had presented itself, it was just too good to pass up. You were home from college for the weekend, and your mother was away on a business trip. That left you alone with plenty of time to bond with your affable new stepdad, who you had no idea was such a raging pervert beneath his friendly smile and easy-going temperament.
The man tried to keep his hands steady as he dared to pull aside the fluffy white blanket covering your unconscious frame. When he saw what you were wearing: a skimpy satin nightgown with lacey straps and little bows along the seams, Pete cursed your unfeigned innocence, "Shit, babydoll. You're not makin' this any easier for yourself."
You were a heavy sleeper; that much he knew. He had seen it firsthand a few times when you had dozed off during movie nights with your mom. He brought a careful hand up to test out the waters, gently pawing at your breast as it rose and fell with your elongated breaths. Receiving no reaction, Pete smiled. He grew a bit bolder, gently teasing his fingertips over the slight tent in the fabric where your unguarded nipple lay. The removal of the blanket was already causing a shift in your body heat, both of your tiny pebbles growing semi-hardened at the drop in temperature.
Your body twitched, your plump lips letting out a quiet sigh as his even hand moved in circles over the stiffening nub. "There. That's nice, isn't it, angel?" he hummed, his other hand venturing to the hem of your nightgown's skirt. As lightly as he could manage, he pushed the fabric up to bunch over your tummy, his eyes widening at the sight of your lacey white panties. "Oh sweetheart," he sighed, his cock throbbing in his boxers at the sight of your clothed mound, "you have no fuckin' idea what you're doing to me."
Your slumbering body was cooperative as he eased your legs apart, scooting himself up a bit as he lay flat on his stomach, his head easing up between your bare thighs. Seeing you shiver slightly, he rubbed a large hand over your legs to warm you up. "Don't worry, baby. Daddy'll take care of you. You just lie there and keep lookin' pretty." The man was practically drooling as he peeled the strip of fabric covering your precious petals away, pushing it carefully to the side. At the sight of your little cunt glistening with the smallest bit of wetness, Pete let out a muffled chuckle. "My naughty girl," he cooed, rolling your nipple a bit more forcefully now between his thumb and finger.
Your little body was rocking gently, pulses of pleasure coursing through your limbs despite your deep state of unconsciousness. Licking his lips, Pete brought both hands down to gently part your folds, exposing your leaky hole to his hungry eyes. "Oh princess," he murmured lovingly, gently prodding the tip of a finger against your itty bitty opening, "so tight down here, aren't you? Daddy'll have to be careful with you, huh baby? Be nice and gentle for my girl."
He dipped his head down, teasing the tip of his tongue in place of his finger. The taste of your sweet, slippery juices only worsened his raging hard-on. Dragging his tongue up to your tiny clit, he traced the little nub in gentle circles, his elbows coming to rest over your thighs as your hips began to buck softly. "That's it, angel. So sweet for me," his hum was slurred as he gently slipped his finger inside you before wrapping his lips around your twitching button.
He pumped his digit in and out at a steady pace, finding your tender ceiling with ease as he nursed your clit. He could feel your core warming beneath him, your poor legs starting to shake weakly as you were worked up to an orgasm in the midst of your unwavering sleep. Soft little whines began rising in your throat as you were brought to the edge by your sinful stepfather's efforts. Seeing your climax approaching, Pete pulled his lips away from your burning nub, replacing them with his thumb. He wanted to see your precious little face as you came; he wanted to watch as your orgasm was forced out of you.
Soon it was, and it hit you with more force than he was expecting. As your cunt contracted helplessly around his single finger, a wave of glistening juices sprayed out onto your printed sheets. The man's grin only widened as he carried you through your high, not slowing his ministrations until your shaking died down. Breaths staggering, you were somehow still fast asleep, pussy dripping shamelessly onto Pete's fingers and the bed below.
Exiting you slowly, he brought his drenched digit up to savor your juices as his greedy gaze remained locked on you. "Oh pretty girl," he murmured with a breathy laugh, "the fun I'm gonna have with you..."
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razzle-n-dazzle · 7 months
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hello, friend!! i saw your adam hcs and i loveddd themmm!! i was hoping to request smth if that’s okay? could we get lucifer with a reader who also struggles with depression like he does (it’s mentioned in episode five if you didn’t know!!) and maybe reader had a practically rough week and gets home from work and just breaks down in tears, and luci find a way to cheer them up? either fem! or gn! reader if that’s chill, tysm for taking your time to consider this even if you don’t get to it!!
— 🪽anon
ᯓ★ "Give Your Corpse Some Smile Lines." Lucifer / Reader | Oneshot TW! Read at your own risk and comfortability! | talks about depression, suicidal topics/actions, overdosing topics/actions, reader breaking down, hurt to comfort, self destruction, abuse
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ᯓ There are days and weeks, sometimes months and years, that prolonged like time, made it appear like it no longer moved and served a purpose. Like time was nothing but a feign idea that was made to torture everyone and anyone who dared think about it, who dared to calculate how it traveled and how long it took to pass a minute. And some days it made people want to break, and some day it made people want to kill other people, and some days it made people overjoyed, and some days it made people excited, and some days it made people nervous, and some days. . . It made you want to die.
ᯓ To be killed in the most brutal fashion known to man, to explode in a death either as silent as taking your own life in your own home or as bright and fantastic as the explosion of fire works. Time for you was never a friend and it continued to taunt you after you had died, overdosing on the pain medication you were prescribed after a horrible accident. Horrific! You had heard people call you, friends and family, after they saw the state of your decaying body after being rammed by a truck who lost control. Monstrous! None of them chose to stay around, none chose to help you when you were at your weakest and worst, when you could barely help yourself. And all you had done back then was help them! Was care for them! Be there for them at any time of the day whenever they needed, whenever they wanted, whenever they asked or called or texted or shouted or pleaded or-
ᯓ And it was a coward move, you were sure. Weak, many would call it, blasphemous and you were sure it was why you never got into Heaven despite having done everything in your power to be okay, to be the perfect person everyone wanted, to be good. But one night, when everything was moving too slow and no one seemed to blink twice at your presence, you would take your own life in silence. To overdose on your own pills, both praying it wouldn't work but gain the attention of someone yet also praying it would kill you and finally let you live in peace. In a world of black nights where you didn't have to open your eyes no longer, where time wouldn't be creeping over your shoulder, where nothing would hurt anymore because dammit. . . everything hurt.
ᯓ IT ALL FUCKING HURT.
ᯓ And then you ended in hell, and then you realized this would be your life . . . and then you realized you were still stuck with your worst enemy of all: Time. Forever stuck in an eternity after life, forever stuck here by yourself, forever being another face in the crowd or another person on the street for people to pass by and not think about twice. Someone. Just someone! Not even someone, no one. Just a shell, just a person decaying on the streets, decaying for all to see. A pitiful show.
ᯓ You could hardly remember when you met Lucifer; Maybe you were down on your luck one day and was eating cold Ramen out of the streets and he took pity to sit by you, to talk to you. Maybe it was when you were at a bar, downing another drink to forget the fact that you were chained down here, chained to your enemy, chained to your eternity of a never ending moment of the hands of time. Maybe you were working your minimum wage job to barely survive, or maybe you bumped into him. You memory hadn't always been good, party due to your own mental health and a constant flight or fight response, yet you had always knew life to be so bleak before you had met him. And then one day, everything was slightly a bit more okay. And slowly everything was a little more barrable; Even just slightly.
ᯓ And maybe a life can be handled in eternity, and you didn't have to be alone anymore . . .
ᯓ Yet, no matter how much anyone wished, love cannot fix all problems. Love can teach you how to heal, love can teach you how to live, love can teach you how to handle everything inside of you in a better manner than self destruction. But love cannot instantly fix everything wrong with you; You should have realized that sooner.
ᯓ You lived a life nothing short of a fairy tale for the last few months, living life alongside a partner who you could share the weight of the world with. Who felt comfortable enough to share the weight of the world with you. Where in the days you both laughed and played, pushing and pulling each other, peppering kissing on skin and longing ones on the lips. And at night you cuddled against each other, both with the fear of losing, both with longing, both just enjoying the company you now had, that you could now share. You've already shared tears, concerns, worries, troubles. You've both been vulnerable under the other's eyes, staining shirts under the other's careful and cradling hug, broken down and rushed out apologies. You've already both taken care of each other, took your time and held patience with each other and you both tried to heal the broken pieces of one another. Most would call it a disaster, a tragedy, yet for you both . . . it was like some sort of twisted hope, knowing you were no longer alone in your self deprecation. Knowing that even if either of you tried to self destruct everything around you, tried to gain that control that's slipping away, tried to push the other away, they would understand and be there. That in the end of the day you had someone to crawl to.
ᯓ Yet even with constant oxygen and wood, a fire can still grow dim in it's own silence and try to snuff itself out.
ᯓ This week had been long, it had dragged you by the heels and you could no longer put the energy to fight against it's slowing seconds. Working a minimum wage job, even after Lucifer had told you that you never had to again (yet you continued to do so for some sort of feeling of schedule and stability), that you hated and wished you could quite for a paycheck that wasn't even that high to withstand the abuse you had to. Lucifer constantly worried about you, about how the job affected you both physically and mentally. You often came home either drained or hurt, as costumers tended to get rather violent down in Hell. It was common to be stabbed during a shift and having to endure it until your shift was over. Effectively causing you to bleed out while still having to rep a costumer service smile. And the stabbing might not even be the worst part of everything; As you had to try many times to bite back any sort of emotion, ire and frustration and sorrow, as costumers yelled, screamed, tossed shit your way for a mistake you didn't even make. And yet it was your fault. It was always your fault and you couldn't do anything but stand there and take it, as your job would be on the line if you did anything other than stand there and take the anger and take the frustrations and the yelling and the stabbing; Being everyone's personal punching bag without any sort of composition.
ᯓ What was the point of it?
ᯓ The thought had came to you one day after you came home, slugging your shoes off your feet and tossing your keys onto the counter. Lucifer wasn't home, he usually was, yet you guessed he had something better to do than hear your sorrows of the day. You would want to do anything than hear about your sorrows as well, you couldn't blame him for trying to avoid you. So you dragged yourself to the bathroom, heavily sitting down upon the close lid of the toilet before sinking down some. A hand rested upon your stomach, the knife that pierced through your side slid in between your fingers like it didn't draw your blood out. Like it wasn't causing you pain; not even the worst pain in your life, just pain that poked and pricked and brought tears to the eyes, but you were no stranger to tears or to blood. You were no stranger to the bruises that covered your body from angry costumers, from the blisters that grew from harsher treatment, from the blood that seeped and stained. And maybe you should take care of that wound, but it was best to keep a knife into the wound than take it out; It stopped bleeding and you hadn't stained that much, you didn't think, and you were oh so tired so maybe. . .just a nap would help. It didn't have to be a long one, yet something in the back of your mind hoped it would be, and you leaned your head back against the back of the toilet. The light above gave out a buzz, showing it was working, sounding that it was on and here.
ᯓ Yet a nap sounded nice.
ᯓ "Honey! I'm home!" Lucifer shout, a cheerful laugh followed and a careful grin was stretched on his face as he tried to balance the bags of groceries that were in his arms; Trying to make his one round of bringing groceries in to work. He didn't want to drop a single one of them, "I'm sorry I took so long, yet I went to the store and wow! There were a lot of options for things that I was sure I would never make it out of there! Did you know that there's like. . ." Lucifer would pause to count his fingers, having successfully delivered the bags onto the counter without breaking anything, ". . .15 different brands of milk?! And they had like this Milk called Almond milk, where they apparently milk the almond and I don't know how they do that but-" Lucifer's voice fell flat as soon as he noticed you weren't around, at least, not around as usual. By now you would have sprung from the couch, or yelled at him from the bathroom that you were doing your business, or came from the bedroom to wrap him in a hug. Yet your presence was absent and it didn't allude Lucifer, at least, not many more. "H . . . honey?" He would call out again, this time with a more shaken voice and frowned eyebrows; His smile no longer held the confidence of a man who managed to do one round of bringing groceries in with 13 bags.
ᯓ And yet you didn't respond to his call, how could you when your own breath was so shallow your heart was speeding up, stressing, just to pump blood through your body; And Lucifer grew worried. It would triple upon seeing the mess you had left, a mess that hadn't caught his eye until now. . . Your shoes left lazily by the door, your keys stained with blood. Blood that streaked like a hand across the counter top and traveled inward, towards the bathroom and it's door that lingered tauntingly open. And instantly, Lucifer felt his mouth run dry and his feet speed towards the bathroom with nothing but horrible thoughts piling up in his head. You were hurt and you weren't answering his calls. You were hurt and you weren't doing anything to signal to him that you were okay. Are you okay? Are you dead? Oh god he hoped he didn't get to that bathroom door and see your dead body there, all stained and pale. Please don't be dead, please please please. . . "OH MY GOD!-" Lucifer hated to admit the way his body froze in horror by the doorway, one hand clinging onto the frame and the other shot up to cover his mouth. He hated the way his feet stuck to the ground like they were rooted, forcing him to look at your bleeding and barely breathing figure on the floor.
ᯓ And no, he didn't miss the way your blood was smeared on the toilet. He could never miss such a detail when your blood was the last thing he ever wanted to see seep out of your body and pool and stain everything around you.
ᯓ "Oh fuck! Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck!" The words fell out of his lips, fell onto deaf ears, as he ripped his rooted feet off the ground and rushed over to you, to your body. He felt dazed, confused, unsure of himself all of a sudden. What was he supposed to do? What could he do? "Hey, don't be dead come on!-" He didn't realize he was rambling to himself as he kneeled down next to you, not minding the way your blood seeped and stained his white clothes. He shuffled around, looking for your wound, looking for something he could fix to help you! He was so panicked, and had to stich up your wounds so often, that the thought of calling a doctor didn't cross his mind. Lucifer was hesitant to touch you, but didn't want to hurt you, "Wound, wound wound! Where the fuck is your wound?!" He asked before spotting the knife that was jagging out your side. It was mostly covered by your body, as he had happened to kneel down on the opposite side of where your wound pierced in. "Oh fucking duh, it's where the knife is. Nice job Lucifer can't spot a fucking knife when your lover is bleeding out on the floor!- Shit wait I need to actually take care of that. Fuck! Where the hell is the first aid kit?!"
ᯓ To say Lucifer was freaking out during the whole process of taking out the knife, tossing it to the side to be picked up later, disinfecting your wound, trying to stitch it up with shaking hands, and wrapping you up. . . would be an understatement. He was terrified to hold you, afraid he might make the wound worse or he might put you in more pain, yet somehow managed to move you from the bathroom floor to the couch in the living room. He would have put you to bed, at least provided your body a little more comfort, yet he was afraid to leave your side. Afraid that if he took his eyes off of you that something might happen, that you might roll onto the wound and break the sticking, that you might just stop breathing as a whole and leave him alone.
ᯓ He tried calling Charlie to help, yet physicked himself out right before he was going to press the call button. He needed some sort of help, he couldn't go through this alone, yet he didn't want to put his daughter through this either. All he could really do was find himself sitting in front of the couch, head resting upon the cushion, watching your chest rise and fall with heavy eyes; Just to reassure himself you were still here, that you were still alive and you could wake up. Maybe tomorrow? Hopefully. Maybe he should bring you to a hospital. Either way he was here, waiting, hoping.
ᯓ Fuck . . . He didn't know what he would do if you didn't wake up. But you did! By some grace of god you had happened to wake up in the middle of the night, the day after Lucifer had found you. He hadn't been awake, and you were barely moving due to the pain that jabbed at your side. Though you noticed the weight that indented the couch by the edge, slightly turning your head to see Lucifer's crossed arms and nuzzled head into it; He was sleeping, leaning against the couch while sitting on the floor. Drowsy, tired, you glanced over at the couch, wondering why he was sitting down there instead of up here with you. When did you even get to the couch? And then you noticed how you were wearing some of his clothes, with the shirt pulled up to expose your wrapped chest, the bandages still a stained a little crimson red. And you frowned, eyes heavy, looking down at the wound and realizing, at least to some sort of extent, why he wasn't up here. You had scared him . . . A heavy sigh left your lips as you reached a hand out, shaking, as you leaned down into the cushions. Gently, you placed your hand on top of Lucifer's, trying to intertwin your fingers without waking him. If anything, by the way he looked, you were sure he just managed to fall asleep . . . and most likely passed out from exhaustion rather than willingly succumbing to slumber.
ᯓ Though feeling the sudden warmth on his hands, and being half-awake and half-asleep in general, Lucifer's eyes fluttered open despite being rather heavy. He felt heavy, he felt tired . . . yet his hand felt warm, causing his eyes to glance down and notice your hand on top of his. Your hand, your thumb rubbing against his. "Love?. . ." He would mumble out, hoping this wasn't a dream, as he gently raised his head. You noticed the way his eyes sagged a little, his eyelids clearly heavy with eyebags starting to form under his eyes. The frown that had been on his face, tugged down out of pain, began, sluggishly, to tug into a warm smile. "You're awake. . . how are you feeling, do you need anything?" The way his voice croaked, clearly tired and clearly worn from tired and sobbing. His disheveled look, the way his hair was more frazzled than normal and the way his clothes were stained. It all made you upset; Not at him, no, you could never be upset at Lucifer. You were upset at yourself. For causing him so much pain, for making him probably so worried and panicked with the crawling thoughts of your death if he dared to ever take his eyes off of you.
ᯓ Lucifer, waiting for your answer, would gently bring your hand up to his cheek. He had missed your warmth, you had been so cold when he touched you last to move you from the tile of the bathroom floor to the plush cushions of the couch. He was glad that the warmth had returned to body, that he was able to watch your eyes sparkle in the dim lights that flooded in from the kitchen stove hood.
ᯓ His eyes were so gentle, his smile was so genuine, and all you managed to weakly croak out was a, "I'm sorry." And you felt bad feeling the warm tears starting to clump up in your eyes again and spill over. And you felt horrible as Lucifer shot awake, seeing your tears through the light of the kitchen, and rushed to bring his free hand up to your cheek to wipe away your tears. "I'm so sorry Lucifer I. . ." You would choked out, unsure what else to say. How else could you apologize to Lucifer when you knew that you had laid there, on the toilet, with the intention to hopefully die. And you didn't know how to tell Lucifer that to his face, especially when you've never had to tell anyone who's gotten as close to you as Lucifer has that you've thought about killing yourself. That you tried to plan it out in your shared home. Where you knew they would find you. Where you knew. . . "Hey, hey, it's okay. You're-" Lucifer paused for a second, glancing down at the side of your stomach. He had to reassure himself that you were alright before trying to comfort you, "-okay. You're okay now!" Lucifer grinned towards you, a little nervous at first before it fused out into more worry. "You're awake and you're not dying and it's okay! We can. . . talk about it all later okay? Just focus on getting better."
ᯓ You both would sit there in a comfortable, slightly-comfortable, silence as Lucifer stared up at you, and you stared back down at him. His hand, after having cleared your tears, hand reached up to play with your hair, trying to coax you back to sleep. Even when you knew he needed sleep himself, with the way his heavy eyes closed for long periods of time before opening again to meet mine. "Come here. . ." You would mumble, trying to reach for Lucifer, wanting to feel his warmth against yours. He was hesitant to do so, you could tell by the way his eyebrows scrunched upward and the frown that tugged on his lips. It took a while to coax him onto the couch, where even then he gingerly laid on his side and wrapped his arms cautiously a safe place above your bandages and nuzzled his head between the crook of your neck. You were able to play with his hair this time, give him a soft peck on the forehead. A silent apology for all the pain he had to endure because of you without you there to help, without the support he had shown you countless of times without fail.
ᯓ "I. . ." Lucifer's voice warily mumbled out, ". . .thought I was going to lose you." And the way his voice cracked broke your heart into a million pieces. And the only pathetic response you could muster back to him was a soft, shaken, "I'm sorry." As tears silently began to fall down your cheeks, and you could feel the silent tears that fell from Lucifer's eyes stain your neck. "I'm. . . so, so sorry. . ." "It's okay. . ." Lucifer would hug you a little tighter, "We'll work through it together, you're not going to lose me that easily, even if-" He would pause, choking out a bit of laughter between his tears, "-you try yourself."
ᯓ Oh. . . he knew. . .
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How is anyone okay with Tomura dying when it was stated that the trauma made him age super rapidly and that's why his body ended up like that.
There are sooooooo many panels of Tomura going through the worst shit imaginable and taking all the damage like it was nothing, 'cause he wanted so badly to survive.
He was solely born as a suggestion of AFO 'cause he needed a new body and a tool for his plans.
His age went white by age five 'cause AFO turned him into a weapon and tested him by massacring his whole family.
He was presented in the story as a young man with deep psychological and physical issues. We saw him destroying his neck with his nails the moment he failed at the USJ.
Tomura was sleep deprived and exhausted to the point of hallucinating while he fought on MVA. That was after he admitted that he couldn't remember most of what happened when he was a kid.
The amount of times he threw up because his trauma was overwhelming????
Tomura got that surgery because he wanted the power to destroy what made it so hard to live for his and his friends and ended up possessed by the man who had ruined his entire life.
That panel of Tomura agonizing in pain on the ground after the Star and Stripe fight, while AFO looked so fresh and patted him like a well-behaved cat makes me so sick.
AFO wanted to use as sacrificial pawns all of Tomura's friends, after Tomura had stated time and time again how much he cared for them and how far he'd go to protect them.
Somehow Tomura got rid of AFO and his body freaking evolved to protect him. His body was taking the form of his dead family and it was moving like a shield and a sword in his favor.
He lived in a freaking time loop where he'd live endlessly the day he killed his family.
Finally AFO got killed and he got "rescued" from his traumas by Deku, only for AFO to come back, reveal that Tomura was never free to start with.
AFO almost erased a screaming Tomura from existence. The only reason Tomura didn't die is because Deku had passed OFA to him and Nana shielded Tomura to protect him.
All that for Tomura to come back just to help Deku defeat AFO is the most unexciting panel ever, say his last words and die decayed.
All his family? Dead. His dog? Dead. His childhood friends? Probably turned into nomus. His found family? Either dead, hurt or missing. The person responsible for raising him, the one who actually fulfilled the parent role? A child soldier 16 years old boy turned into a zombie butler that died by trying to protect him.
The cherry on top is that the heroes would justify trying to help him by focusing on his 5 years old version, instead of acknowledging that the man Tomura Shigaraki became was worth fighting for and worth loving and rescuing. Tomura refused to stop being the leader of the League of Villains for a reason, yet Deku would still call him Tenko and All Migh would dare say that Deku "saved his soul" as if that was worth something.
The hero society is far from being fixed, the story is far from being over, the villains made progress but they are still fighting because there is still so much corruption and ignorance surrounding the most important points of what makes a villain, you know, a villain.
And the one character who deserved the most to have a second chance at life all is dead :(
Tell me how is anyone satisfied with this...
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District Girl (Part 1) || (Peacekeeper) Coriolanus Snow x Reader || Smut
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Outline: In district 12, peacekeeper Coriolanus Snow catches you sneaking past the fence. Thankfully for you, he accepts when you offer him a special arrangement in exchange of his silence.
Word count: 2’700
Warnings: power imbalance, consensual coercion (if that’s a thing), explicit smut.
(( Part 2 )) - (( Part 3 ))
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It had been a long day. The sun was shining bright in the sky and yet, the air was saturated with humidity, making it hard to breathe. His peacekeeper uniform and gear felt heavy. He had showered before leaving the barracks and was already sweating again, adding to his discomfort with the already constant humidity. He hated it here. He hated everything, from the weather to the decaying buildings and the miners walking around with dirty clothes and faces. More than once had he thought about deserting his job, running back to the Capitol where people could manage to maintain a semblance of elegance and dignity, even while starving. But his family were the only people who would welcome him back home, he had nowhere else to go, and illegally deserting would put not only him but his cousin and grandmother in trouble. So he bite down on the inside of his cheek, tasting blood, as he once more gathered courage to keep going.
He had been asked to patrol the outskirts of District 12 for the rest of the afternoon. Smiley had been assigned the same task, covering the eastern part of the border while Coriolanus took care of the west. Without his bunkmates and colleagues to entertain him, time went by slowly. He walked along the tall fence that bordered the district, separating the village and the mines from a vast expanse of tall grass and trees in the distance. He found himself wondering what was hidden behind the forest, if there were other people somewhere that the Capitol didn’t know about. Maybe district 12 would have been nicer if it had included that large and lush landscape within its borders, the idea of patrolling under the shade of the trees seeming a lot more pleasant than doing it under the scorching sun. Maybe there even was a stream of fresh water meandering through the trees or better yet, a lake of cold water in which he could dive in and finally get rid of the beads of sweat that never seemed to leave his forehead, not since he had stepped in this foreign place.
His imagination running wild with ways to make his new home more bearable, he almost missed it. That movement in the corner of his eye, that trail of trampled grass leading to the fence… He turned around to see a silhouette, crouching down to enter the limit of the district from under broken wires he hadn’t even noticed when he had walked passed it a few minutes earlier. A trespasser. But were you an intruder or just a rule breaker ?
“Hey!” He shouted, the authority in his tone surprising both you and him. You lifted your head, eyes widening as you saw him and tried to hurry but the hem of your skirt was hooked to a sharp piece of wire that didn’t seem to want to let you go that easily.
His hand went to his belt, where his weapon was ready to be pulled out in case you were some kind of threat. Even if you didn’t look like it, Coriolanus knew better than to trust people, especially the people of District 12.
You didn’t want to get in trouble. All you wanted was to go back to your shack and forget about this encounter. You had heard enough terrible stories about peacekeepers to know you needed to avoid them at all cost. And mostly, you knew you had to be weary of the new ones like him, the ones who didn’t make deals and trades in exchange of turning an blind eye to whatever the citizens of your district needed to do in order to survive.
He was getting closer. Dangerously closer. And although he was walking slowly, almost carefully in your direction, you had noticed how his long fingers were just inches away from his weapon, ready to grab it and use it on you. So you decided to sacrifice your skirt, even though you didn’t own another one, and ran off, hearing the sound of the fabric tearing apart.
Coriolanus didn’t expect you to run. Where would you go anyway ? He had caught you breaking the law, he knew what you looked like, he wasn’t going to let you get out of it so easily. If he had to abide to rules he clearly didn’t want to follow, do a job he hated and was forced to live in this depressing area just because he was meant to face the consequences of his actions in the Capitol, you would have to face yours too.
He ran after you, easily catching up on you with his tall legs. And, since you weren’t making it easy for him, refusing to stop and comply, he grabbed you by the arm and yanked you back, a scream escaping your lips in reaction.
“Please, let me go.” You begged. “I wasn’t doing anything wrong, I was looking for food past the fence to feed my family.”
He listened. He even understood. He too had struggled to find food for himself and his family a few years back. He knew what it felt like to be hungry. And he knew how it hurt to see your loved ones starving too. However, the people of the districts deserved it. It was the consequences of their actions, a fair turn of the tables that they were the ones knowing poverty now. And hopefully, it would only get worse from now on. They needed to know that they were nothing without the Capitol. And they needed to know that their reckless behavior would cause the downfall of their own people.
He held both of your wrists together in your back, his free hand pressing against the back of your neck to make you walk forward. He wasn’t sure what your punishment would be for trespassing and frankly he didn’t care, the only thing that really mattered was that his superiors would at least notice that he was a good element, if not the best one they had.
You kept begging him for freedom, explaining yourself and assuring him that your escapade to the woods wasn’t a threat in any way to the government but he stayed stoic, still walking you in direction of the peacekeepers’ barracks with your hands held painfully tight in your back.
As the austere buildings came in sight, you decided to fight back, abruptly trying to free yourself from his grip. It took him by surprise and you managed to run forward, all the way to a narrow path by the side of the barracks before he caught you again. He grabbed you with both hands this time, pushing you against the stone wall of the building with your arms held above your head. He was close, his broad shoulders blocking your view of everything else but him. His body was a fence you wouldn’t be able to cross, it was trapping you against the wall, leaving you helpless and at his mercy and he did not looked pleased.
“I promise I won’t do it again.” You said, knowing as well as he did that it was a lie. “I’m going home to tell my family that I haven’t found anything for them to eat today, isn’t that enough of a punishment ?”
Coriolanus’s pale blue eyes stared at you, visibly conflicted. He knew that feeling all too well. And indeed, it was a sufficient punishment in his opinion. An even more cruel one than anything his superiors might have in store for you. However, he couldn’t just let you go like this, not when you had been such a pain to catch. You had interrupted his quiet stroll along the fence, you had made him run under the scorching sun, you didn’t deserve that much mercy.
“Please, I’ll do anything.” You said, making sure he would notice the implications you put in your last word, staring right back at him as suggestively as you could. You knew peacekeepers were easily convinced by the prospect of a bit a fun with a woman since they didn’t get to have that much of it while in service. It was a good way to get out of trouble. And this peacekeeper in particular was handsome enough to make you slightly nervous at the idea of him accepting what you tried to suggest.
Coriolanus wasn’t sure what to think. Or do. For a moment, he wasn’t even sure he had heard you correctly at all, getting lost in your beautiful eyes instead of focusing on your words. Maybe such close proximity to a woman was messing with his head, it had been a while after all. In fact, he had never been that physically close to anyone before and the fact that he had you pinned down against the wall, holding so much power over you made all his blood instantly rush down to his cock. There was something deeply satisfying at the thought that he could do whatever he pleased with you. Especially there, concealed from the other peacekeepers that might be leaving or entering the barracks, with nothing in his back but the fence, he could do anything and no one would know.
“Do we have a deal ?” You asked him, arching your back enough for your hips to brush against his, bringing his attention - and yours - to the impressive bulge that had formed in his pants.
Oh, it was wrong. So wrong. He shouldn’t even consider it, he should do his job and bring you to his superiors as he had been instructed to do in such circumstances but there was something about you that made him hesitate. Maybe it was how short your skirt was now, with half of it still stuck in the fence, it revealed more of your body than you were comfortable with and he definitely liked what he saw. The curves of your body, the shape of you, your lovely face… You were so different from the others. If he could have Tigris design some fashionable clothes for you and arrange your hair, you could look like a girl from the Capitol. One that he could be interested in…
But you were a girl from the filthy and barbaric district 12 and he was a peacekeeper.
“Deal.” He breathed, taking unexpected pride in the way your cheeks turned red at his word. You had never been so shy in front of a peacekeeper before, maybe it was because he was too handsome for words or maybe it was because he had an odd elegance to him that intrigued you, made you want to know who he was and where he came from. But you’d have to wait to indulge your curiosity with small talk, you had the end of a deal to hold and you actually felt pretty eager to get it done.
His breath caught in his throat when you dropped to your knees in front of him, your hands still held up above your head by one of his, yet no longer all pressed up against the wall. He easily opened his pants with his free hand, pulling out his already hard erection for you. Your hands moved, instinctively wanting to close your fingers around his cock but he held them back, still tightly in his grip.
“You won’t need them.” He told you, meeting your eyes. You quietly nodded and opened your mouth as wide as you could, letting him decide what to do next.
Still with one hand, he guided his cock past your pretty lips, the sensation of his sensitive skin gliding on your soft tongue almost ending him on the spot. He wasn’t prepared for how warm and wet it would feel, how his shaft would slide so perfectly all the way until his tip touched the back of your throat, making you gag.
You bopped your head for him, creating friction, having him slide back and forth in your mouth while you also focused on your breathing to avoid gagging too often. His eyes were clouded with intense pleasure when he closed them, letting you take care of him without opposing much resistance.
Fuck, it felt good. Especially when you took him down your throat, his whole cock fitting inside your mouth and your soft lips enclosing the base. He liked the way your cheeks were still colored pink, how your eyes watered from how big he was to swallow and how incredibly arousing it was to have you on your knees in front of him. A moment before you were a rebel, a reckless girl breaking the rules regardless of the punishment you might face and now, he had you tamed and compliant as he slowly fucked your mouth.
But maybe It was a bit too slow. Once the excitement of the new sensations he felt died down, there was only one thing he could think about; relief. That intense pleasure that you had carefully built in the pit of his stomach was begging for release, to explode on your tongue so that he could fill your mouth with his cum. He wondered if you would swallow it all, compliant til the very end or if you’d let it past your lips, drip on your chin and clothes like a very visible sign that he had marked you as his.
He was too eager to find out. He wanted to see for himself, feel how gloriously good it was going to be once his pleasure would splash out of him. So he stepped forward, forcing you back to the wall, hands still pinned up. You had no room left to move your head anymore and it was exactly what he wanted, thrusting his cock inside you himself instead. His rythym was fast and merciless, making you gag and feel breathless. His pushes forward were strong and quick, and soon, you felt his warm release drip down your throat, as his eratic movements finally came to a stop.
His cock was still twitching, spitting out white cum when he pulled it out of your mouth to allow you to breathe again, drops falling down on your chin and chest. He was breathless too, and the hunger you saw in his eyes as he stared at the drop of his cum that was slowly rolling downwards on your chest made you wonder if he was going to ask for more. He sure looked like he was ready to give it another go, right there and now.
But he unexpectedly released your wrists instead, taking a step back to arrange his still hard cock back inside his pants. With the blood finally rushing back down your arms, you tried to stand up. To your surprise, the peacekeeper held a hand out for you, helping you back up like a gentleman would.
You both stared into each other’s eyes for a moment. You wanted to ask him where his manners came from, and why he wasn’t using them to navigate high society instead of being here but you couldn’t find the courage to say anything at all. There were many questions he wanted to ask you too, starting with asking for your name, but he refrained from saying anything, knowing it was better if he kept his distances. The last thing he wanted was to fall for a district girl.
You fled without a word but granting him a smile and he let you, memorizing the way your perfect body looked like in that torn skirt you probably were going to throw away now, wondering if he’d ever get to take a peek underneath your clothes.
When he went out that night with his friends, he didn’t mention you even though he knew it would have earned him the admiration of his roommates. And when he wasn’t able to fall asleep once in his bed, his mind flooded with all the possibilities of what else he could do to you - if he ever got another chance to - he ended up sneaking out of the barracks and walking back to the fence in the middle of the night, to retrieve the piece of your skirt that was still dangling in the wind, hooked to the wire meant to keep everyone in.
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shadybiotics · 4 months
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P e n t u p e m o t i o n s
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× pairing: venture x reader
× words: 1700
× content: fem!reader, afab!venture, nsfw, one sided pining, venture is a little pent up lol,,, masturbation, this is mostly smut
× summary: The Wayfinders have recently taken in a new practitioner assistant under their wing, and never before has Venture bottled their emotions more.
[ A/N ] : i need venture desperate and needy but like,,, in a pathetic and embarrassing way, enjoy
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It was late. The day was about to end and the dig site has become awfully quiet as everyone was already in bed.
Sloane laid on their back in their tent, arm under their head. It was silent and peaceful. Its been a long day at the dig site, they were exhausted and yet they couldn't fall asleep. As they tossed and turned trying to get some shuteye, their thoughts repeatedly trailed back to a certain someone. To you.
Its been two and a half months already since you joined the Wayfinders but Venture warmed up to you in no time. You showed genuine interest in what they were doing and always tried your best.
You were still only a practitioner assistant so you didn't exactly do much yet. You were mainly there to watch, take notes and learn but not wanting to be completely idle you kept offering your help in various ways. Venture remembered your eagerness fondly, how you kept saying that 'its no big deal' and how you can 'do it on your own'. It was cute, they thought. Thinking back on it brought a tender smile to their face. They sighed.
There was one instance where some crates and boxes needed moving. Venture took a break from their own work and was about to get to it, before your hands suddenly clasped the edges of the crate as you leaned over it. "I got it" you said with confidence.
You didn't really look like someone who had a lot of experience with heavy lifting, not to Venture you didn't at least. They feared they would feel guilty if they let you lift these boxes all on your own, before their eyes started drifting that is. As you leaned over the crate your top hung loosely, giving them a comfortable peek at your chest from where they stood. Venture ogled with their brows slightly raised. The idea of letting you do it instead didn't seem so bad anymore.
"Uh sure, go ahead" Venture complied running their hand through their sweat damped hair, you grinned. With a huff you leaned down further, your top drooping even lower, unknowingly to you, and showing more of your breasts. Even the lace of your bra now clearly visible. Venture just stood there frozen and staring, their eyes watched intensely when your arms squeezed your chest together as you lifted the wooden box with yet another huff. Their wide eyes met yours as you smiled and walked away, visibly struggling but not giving up. Their cheeks rapidly darkened as they finally caught themselves staring. Damn.
Remembering these moments made their head swoon all over again, their breath getting heavier with each passing moment.
Frustrated, with one hand they reached up and rubbed their face, trying to rub those fantasies out of their mind. Their attempt pointless. With a tense face and brows tightly knit their hand slithered down, down... down slowly, soon reaching the waistband of their pants. Their eyes relaxed closed. Without thought and with a smooth flick of a finger Sloane undid one button. And then another.
There was also another time, when you and Venture sat closely arm to arm. Notepad and pen in your hand as Venture expressively explained the proper way to restore different items and trinkets that you would inevitably, hopefully, find. How to tell their age, how to look out for signs of damage or decay, and how to then handle such fragile findings.
You listened carefully as you noted their advice, asking a few questions here and there. You were so focused on your note taking that you didn't even realize how you pursed your lips slightly to the side or how cute you looked when you swooped loose hair strands away from your face.
"God...", Venture cursed themselves. They wished you knew what you were doing to them. They wished you knew how adorable and alluring you were, how you always managed to make their day ten times better with your witty words and honest smile. They sighed. That smile... and those lips... "...This is just awful".
Ventures hand kept going lower.
They imagined how it would feel to bite your lip, to lightly trace their teeth on your neck. They imagined themselves finally getting to roughly tug that damn top of yours down and fully seeing what was underneath. Their large calloused hands hungrily feeling your body, grabbing and squeezing anywhere, everywhere...
Before Venture knew it, their hand was down their trousers. Thick fingers slowly but firmly traced continuous small circles. Their heartbeat quickened. Sloane licked their lips before they let out a shaky breath they weren't aware they were holding.
They wondered if you liked getting your hair pulled, hell, they would love to give it a try. Their large hands wrapping themselves in your lovely hair and tugging at your scalp, lightly at first, hoping to hear some delicious sounds leave your mouth as you arched into them. Pushing you further and further, seeing how much you can take. How rough they could get before you couldn't take any more.
Venture was almost panting now.
They have become so pent up over these few weeks and they needed this badly. They needed you badly and they hates how you weren't the one touching them right now. They despised how all they had to rely on right now to release some of these frustrations was their own hand.
More flustered now, their other hand gripped the bedding of their tent tightly, the knot inside growing tighter rapidly.
They wanted to know how to work you right. They wanted to learn the curves of your body, learn how to please you. They wanted to please you.
Their hips involuntarily bucked into their hand again and again, breathy moans and grunts leaving their lips as they thought about bending and stretching you to their will, shoving their fingers in your mouth... down your slit. Would you lick them? Maybe suck on them? Or bite them playfully, they wondered. Their fingers worked faster now, harder.
"Ah... ah..." Sloane moaned louder now. They sucked in a breath through gritted teeth as they imagined your hands playing with their body. How lovely your hands would feel as they slowly traced Sloanes jaw, then neck, then chest. Clawing there just enough to leave light marks where your nails previously scratched.
They were so close now. Muscles beginning to spasm. Head tossing and turning.
God, they would love to be marked by you. Just the thought of you leaving little scars on their flushed skin as you grind onto their fingers -no their strap -no their mouth, they couldn't even decide. Mind all too fuzzy.
Grunts and groans escaped their mouth when they thought of how pretty your eyes would look when looking down at them as they ate you out. Your eyes glossy with tears from overstimulation as they made you see stars over and over, lapping you up with their skilled tongue. Your thighs bruised from their secure grip as their tongue flicked your clit with precision.
Fuck. Even when you did little to nothing you drove them crazy. A memory of you sitting on one of the crates you just got done moving flashed before Sloanes eyes. Your shirt uncomfortably sticky with sweat, your chest heaving in exhaustion, lips slightly parted and a bead of sweat rolling down your forehead. A book in your hand used to fan yourself.
Venture wished they could get you to such a state. Make you sweat. Make you feel exhausted. Be the cause of your chest rising and falling rapidly.
Venture was so close now. Their fingers were getting sloppier and the rhythm of their hips shaky. They were almost there. They chocked out a repressed moan and hissed in pleasure, their hand circling even faster. They were about to-
" Pssst... "
A whisper ripped through the thin fabric of Ventures tent unannounced and jarringly yanked Sloane out of their sweet, sweet trance. In a panic, followed by cold sweat and a heaving chest, they hastily jolted up. Eyes wide darting everywhere trying to find the source of the sound.
"Vent- Sloane?" You corrected yourself "You sound like you're in pain... are you alright?" you questioned with a soft tone, your voice quiet and clearly concerned.
The realization of what was happening suddenly dawned on them.
Completely lost in their fantasies, Sloane was being way too loud for their own safety. Were they so loud that they have accidentally awoken you?! Or did you just happen to walk by?? Possibly on a late night walk and overheard them as you passed by?!? Their mind panicked even more as it came down from the previous high.
Their face quickly darkened in embarrassment before they tried coughing up some explanation. But still in shock, they couldn't think of anything.
Thankfully you didn't seem to get the right idea of what was really going on here.
"Y-y-yeah. . . yeah im fine" They replied shakily, still out of breath.
"Are you sure you aren't hurt? Do you want me to look you over?" Venture eyes widened as they heard you take a step closer to their tent, now horrified you might pull the zipper next and have to see them in this humiliating state. Their mind was screaming at them. They waved their hands frantically in front of them, as if that was going to be of any help to stop you from moving any closer.
"Nonono! Im sooooo good! I just uh..." they paused thinking "I scraped my arm on.. something, earlier! Today! Im tooootally coolio though!" they chuckled. Nervousness clear as day in their voice.
There was a moment of silence, an awfully tense and uncomfortable silence.
Venture could almost choke on their heartbeat because of how hard their heart was pounding in their throat.
"Alright then, if you say so, good night Sloane" you replied warmly as your footsteps slowly grew more distant.
When your footsteps could no longer be heard Venture flopped back down onto their back and groaned, scolding themselves mentally as one arm covered their face. If they could they would scream right about now.
Great... this is just... great.
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magicalgoblinz · 1 year
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One Thing
Summary: You did it. Cazador's dead and now... Astarion is finding himself working through some big emotions. Pairing: Astarion x gn!reader Word Count: 3.5 k Warnings: General angst, eluding to physical, emotional, and sexual abuse. Possibly ooc Astarion. Quickly edited. Song Recommendation: Never Let Me Go + Florence and the Machine Author's Note: First thing I've ever written for Astarion but I get the feeling it won't be the last. I really genuinely just wanted to get this idea out of my brain even if it's a bit strange and not all that amazing haha.
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It had been a long day. Perhaps one of the longest you and your party had endured yet, or... at least it felt that way. It wasn't hard on your body like the goblin fight had been, nor had it been arcanely exhaustive like chasing that damned hag was. No, standing in the halls of Cazador's palace brought a different type of exhaustion. Passing through the spaces that your lover had once stalked attempting to go unseen by his master, seeing the sights of the spaces he was kept, smelling the decay, the putridness that no doubt lingered in the meals he was forced to partake in.
Every sight, smell, and sound you had come across weighed heavily on you. Even now as you sat in the plush comfort that was Elfsong Inn, freshly washed, the scents lingered in your nose and left a bitter taste in your mouth.
You pushed around the hastily prepared hash in your bowl, frown bared for everyone to see. Your thoughts were only for him. Every second of silence you could hear his sobs in that moment. The cries pulled from his very core, the kind of cries you could imagine he had dreamed of releasing for so long through every moment of torture he was subjected to. There was no way to imagine all of the atrocities he had suffered, yet somehow being left with nothing made every idea that flitted past your mind's eye so much worse.
You for so long had wished to weep for him. Weep for the time he had lost. Weep for the pain he must have felt in having to stand on the outside wondering if his family and friends ever thought of him again after he passed on. Weep for the crushed hopes for the future he had at one time had.
But what good would your tears do him now?
Cazador was dead.
And more importantly... Astarion was free.
So why did it all still feel so... excruciatingly heavy?
"Ts'ka --- eat and do not play. You need your strength for tomorrow." Lae'zel pushed from her lounging position on the floor.
"Have some heart, Lae'zel. It’s been a very difficult day." Wyll was quick to defend upon seeing the way your expression soured at the thought of eating. "Y/n, had to assist our resident vampire through some very hard things today. Including walking through where he had been kept prisoner. Imagine having to do the same with your lover." He said with a gesture towards Lae'zel.
"If I had a lover they would be able to care for themselves; it would be the first thing I looked for in a mate. A prowess to stay alive in battle like my own is the only thing that is truly attractive." Lae'zel said with a lifted chin.
Wyll's lips parted as if to say something more but began to shake his head, there was no fighting with La'zel. She didn't dig her heels in when it came to opinions, no her entire feet were buried. "Speaking of Astarion, where is he?" He eventually asked, changing the focus of the conversation.
"I believe he went for a bath." Shadowheart interjected, "He said something about not being able to stand having his beauty mired... you know how he is." She said, not lifting her eyes from her bowl with a small wave of her spoon that was held in delicate fingers.
Her saying this seemed to pull your eyes towards the door of the wash room. It had been a while since he left now that you thought about it. Your brows lowered a bit in thought; Astarion deserved his space right now, but you still couldn't help but want to hold his hand and not let it go after everything that had happened today. Maybe he wouldn't want that though, not with what you did today.
That look in his eyes...
Now that he had the time to actually think about what you did, what you talked him into doing; would he feel betrayed?
You had promised him you'd help him get that power he so desired, but when that chance came you changed your mind.
The idea of Astarion no longer trusting you hurt more than imagining him ending whatever it was the two of you had. The worries made your expression sullen even more, looking down at your bowl with a deeper pit growing in your stomach. Did you really want to find out?
Out of the blue, there is a light nudge to your arm. The little touch is enough to pull you back up from your descent into grieving something you hadn't even lost yet. With a glance to your right you find Karlach with a bottle outstretched to you. "I think we could all use a little drink tonight... but especially Astarion." She said warmly, "Perhaps you should see if he wants some?" She continued with a little jerk of her head towards the closed doors. Her tone made it all to clear that your inner turmoil was written out on your face for everyone to see.
A sigh escaped your throat as you debated on whether or not that was a good idea but the way Karlach began to lazily swing the bottle back and forth with her hand triggered something in your mind that made you reach out and take it in one smooth movement.
It couldn't hurt to check in on him?
Could it?
Astarion's head was rested back, hanging over the edge of the bath he sat in. The water had lost the majority of its warmth, and his hand had pruned but he made no movements to get out. Eyes transfixed on the dancing flames in the fireplace at the side of the room. Every twist of orange and lift of a spark made his mind lurch through another memory; they all seemed to be coming back to him now, one by one. His mind shuddered from the thought of a blade pressed into his skin, carving, etching, his skin becoming the canvas for a dastardly design that he wouldn't understand for years.
Funnily, the recollection of pain wasn't what bothered him. It was having to recall his own voice struggling not to escape his lips throughout the entire gut-wrenching experience that made his hand ball into a fist.
With a pop and crackle of the wood Astarion's memories would carry on to something else.
His ears ringing, echoing the silence of that tomb. Gods above that tomb. That year spent in silence. Those months spent starving. The way his hands bled from trying ever so desperately to escape. Over what...? A boy that he couldn't bear to steal the life away from.
Astarion took in a sharp breath as he tried to shake away the thought, as he sat up.
But still the memories continued to bleed through. The faces of all those people he had brought to Cazador, he could see them in his mind's eye. The memories of bedding some of them, cycling through his head in a complete sequence even though they were spread across centuries. A flash of a young human woman who excitedly spun in a brand new red dress that she was ever so excited to show off. The pale blue of a nervous elf man's eyes as they darted around the room the second Astarion approached. Seeing the tattoos and the scars spread across the back of a dwarven sailor who stretched after returning to the mainland after a long voyage. The shine of a coy tiefling woman's smile as she attempted to steal his coin purse from his pocket. So many lives, so many people. At what point did he begin to stop caring? Who was it that he pulled by the wrist back to a dreary room that made him start drifting away any time he had to become intimate? Or was it any of them at all?
His features twisted into an expression of disgust the second his mind started going down that path. There was no amount of Cazador being dead that made those memories better. In a snap his balled up hands lifted to rub his eyes in annoyance. If only Astarion could wash out his eyes and his mind and start anew. If only.
And to think... he had wanted this for so long.
He had dreamt about the day he'd be able to have the cathartic feeling of stabbing Cazador, again, and again, and again. And now that it had come and gone... he wished he could have kept going forever. Fuck, he wished he had. After everything Cazador had done to him, the bastard deserved so much worse than to bleed out on that cold floor. He deserved to suffer just as much as Astarion had, if not more.
Astarion couldn't help but wish that he had ignored everyone and continued the ritual as a perfect slap in the face to Cazador. Continued that ritual, so for the first time in all these years... he'd be safe. Entirely safe. And the loss of that made his chest ache, he was so close to crying all over again.
But then...
Tap, tap, tap
"Astarion," Your voice started from just beyond the doors. "I'm sorry to bother you. I just um... wanted to check in. Karlach thought you might need a drink."
There was you.
Astarion's head lifted from his hands as he took in a deep breath. He tried to shove all those emotions back down again, to put the cork back in the bottle before they could really bleed out into him properly. His gaze lingering on the door, lips unmoving.
"Didn't you hear him? If you complete the ritual, you'll be consumed, Astarion." You had said with a look of sincere terror in your eyes. The look wasn't foreign to him... but perhaps different? People had been scared of him before, oh people had been terrified once they realized what he was. But just how many people had been scared for him? That... he didn't know.
He couldn't remember his exact words in reply now, the tension and adrenaline leaving them in a silent part of his mind but what he did recall was the way you looked at him. It stung. It stung so much more than the little voice in the back of his mind screaming that you were breaking your promise.
You promised to help him ascend. You swore you would help him ascend. You said---
Gods that look. Astarion couldn’t shake it.
The way your eyes seemed to plead with him before you had even opened your mouth. Begging him to reconsider. "I know you think this will set you free, but it won't." Your voice was so gentle, but still so desperate. "This power will trap you, just like it trapped Cazador. Is that really what you want?"
You were right, as much as he hated it. You were always right.
But more than that. As he thought about it now, he recognized something that he hadn't in that moment...
Just outside the door you stood listening, hoping to hear something, anything. Your thumb fumbled with the cork of the bottle nervously. This was a bad idea wasn't it? He needed more time. This was too soon to try and come see him. Gods... what if he really did hate you for what you did. You started to shake your head, "...I'm going to take that as a no. I'll um..." you started lightly, trying not to have your worry show through in your words. "I'm sorry again for interrupting. I'll see you when you're finished, my darling."
Once more. You wanted to call him that one more time before he had a chance to break things off.
"Come in."
Your eyes couldn't help but widen ever so slightly, hand moving to the handle before cautiously pushing the door open and poking your head in. From this angle you could see Astarion's side profile, the good majority of the grime and blood from the day having been washed away, though his clothes that sat off to the side on a bench, were stained a deep red that would take ages to remove, if it ever came out at all. His eyes soon looked your way tiredly. As an instinct you quickly held up the bottle you had brought him, no words coming to follow it, they all seemed to have gone into hiding the second his eyes landed on you.
"Are you planning on bringing the bottle here my sweet, or to just... swing it around like an idiot?" He asked in a long drawn out way, a tone that felt like he was trying to maintain a sense of normalcy for you, but at this point in your adventure together the look in his eyes was more than enough to tell you that he was working through something.
You were entirely taken aback by the gentle name used, a little bit of relief seeping into your chest. "Y-you want me to come in?"
"Was that not what I said?"
Your lips parted, deciding not to speak just yet and instead closing the door behind you. "I'm sorry... I just didn't want to overstep with you, you know… washing and all." You said slowly, acting as if you weren’t both adults – who had on more than occasion – slept together.
Even now, even after seeing him at his lowest today, you were still trying to respect whatever boundaries he had. The thought made Astarion close his eyes and let out a soft laugh, "Darling, you've seen me naked before, it's fine." He assured, "Now...please, for the love of gore and everything soaked in blood, can you bring me that bottle."
There was no reluctance now, carrying yourself to his side with ease. As you approached you couldn't help but notice that his hair was still matted thick with blood in places. All this time he clearly had just been lost in his thoughts as much as you expected really. His hand reached up the second you drew near, taking the bottle from your hands greedily, popping the cork and taking a decidedly long drink. Not minding you at all as you reluctantly found a seat on the bench his clothes were rested upon.
The sight of his nose scrunching a bit from the taste of the wine made an ever so small smile tug at the corner of your mouth. It was hard not to recall him making that same face at the tiefling party not so long ago. Vinegar for wine. Would there be a day when the wine you brought him didn't elicit that involuntary response?
Astarion glanced at you from the corner of his eye, "You'd have made an excellent vampire, you know." He said with an amused little grin, all happy to see the confusion cover your features.
"Why is that?"
"Asking to come in, obviously." He joked loosely,
A small laugh left your lips as your eyes drifted to the floor, "I didn't realize that respecting people's privacy was so vampiresque."
"It's not, we're atrociously nosey by nature and well... it's just another fun hindrance to go against that nature I suppose." Astarion spoke in his normal moseying draw. 
"I see..."
There was a breadth of silence between the two of you. A silence that carried the heaviness of the day's events. You knew it needed to be said, but it didn't make it any easier to consider what the exact words were that needed saying. How to broach it? What if he didn’t want to talk about it at all and you misread the situation entirely? You kept glancing his way hoping to have it all come together in your mind like some sort of epiphany, yet he beat you to it.
"I'm not upset with you, darling. You don't have to keep looking at me like that." Astarion spoke suddenly with all the ease in the world.
"You're not?"
"Well,  perhaps I was a little at first. You did go back on your word, after all." Astarion pointed out, eyes now fixed on the bottle in his hand. “I think anyone might be a bit… sour after something like that.”
There was the guilt again. "Astarion... I'm sorry, I---"
"I don't want your apologies." He cut in sharply, finally turning his gaze to look your way.  Despite what his tone may have indicated, his eyes weren't as stern as they normally appeared when he was upset. No, they were instead ever so full of sadness.  "...I-I'm not angry with you. I swear it. But what I don't understand is why I don't feel any fucking better." Astarion said as his voice suddenly sounded so much more fragile. "I... I killed him. I got the revenge I've dreamed about for two-hundred fucking years. The same revenge I begged for the whole year I was locked in that horrid tomb." He hissed, "I took back my life and yet I... I feel like I didn't do enough."
He was cracking. That much you could see.
"I can't help but wonder if I had completed the ceremony if that would have been enough. Enough to rub it in his Gods damned face that I did it." Astarion admitted sternly, lifting his chin as his eyes stayed focused on the bottle still, "Watch this worm take away everything from him like he took everything from me." He mumbled out, the heat leaving his voice for a brief second as all that he was left with was glassy eyes.
"...I-I would have never had to fear anyone or anything ever again..." Astarion uttered through clenched teeth, tears finally breaking free and running down his cheeks one at a time. "...and now it's gone."
Wordlessly you got to your feet, taking a few steps forward to close the gap between you both, leaning down to wrap your arms around his neck in the most comforting hug you could possibly muster. His hand immediately finds your arm, holding it tight as for the second time in your journey, he begins to cry.
Silence seems to be what Astarion needed from you, wailing into the open air as everything he has stuffed away into that bottle comes pouring back out. No apologies. No consoling words. Just for you to hold him, to give him time. His head rests against yours almost as if to ensure that even now, after everything you both had been through, you couldn't see him cry. Perhaps the idea of you seeing it happen twice in a day was too much for him. Or perhaps there was still a festering feeling of weakness that would bubble up if he let you see him cry.
"Oh my sweet, sweet, Astarion." You mumbled holding him tighter than before, listening as his sobs grew softer over the passing moments. 
Waiting. Listening.
Once his frame had stopped shaking you finally raised your voice once more . "...if I could Astarion, I would take away all of the hurt in an instant... but I can't. And I wish you knew just how much it pains me to not be able to." You speak, parting your lips to continue on but pause as you feel a familiar shudder resonate through your mind. He was peering in, confirming the statement for himself it seemed. "The most I can do is promise you something..." you continued on, pretending like you weren't aware of poking around, you had nothing to hide for one key reason…
Gently you pulled back, running your hand from his neck to his chin to tilt his head up. Eyes looking over his tear stained cheeks and then to meet his own shimmering red eyes. "I promise you that, as long as I'm here you will never have to fear anything... or anyone again." You assured, thumbs brushing over his cheeks as you wipe away his remaining tears. “Because Astarion… I love you and… I will never let you go.”
The look that fills Astarion's eyes is something that you had only seen once before when you decided to hug him for the first time back in the Shadowlands. It was a look that spoke numbers towards just how frightening the unknown was for him. How terrifying it could be to have someone love you so truly and want nothing in return for the first time in his life.
You feel a rush of surprise followed by so overwhelming, your lips curl into the same smile you gave him then as you had reached out to wrap your arms around him to hold him tight…
You know the feeling even if he can’t say it yet.
Love.
Because that was the thing. Astarion had realized before this that you… well, you were the only good thing that he’s ever had. That he’d do just about anything to keep you safe and ensure that no one dare take you away from him. Yet, strangely he never once considered…
That he might mean just that much to you.
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End Notes: Thank you so much for reading! I'd really love to start writing for Astarion more so if you have any ideas send them over <3
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