#why yes i will jump onto a trend

[leisi-lilacdreams]

Ma`am

[wonbokkies]

lipstick trend ! - zb1 makane line 💋✩ ˛˚.

pairing: maknae line x gn! reader

syn: their reactions before doing the trend!

warnings: fluff! mentions making out in ricky's (woops)

perm tl: open!

shen quanrui !

“are you serious.” was all you heard from the blonde haired boy, causing you to shrug. was he  that much against the idea?

“what, i think it’s cute.” you chirped, a sweet grin etched on your face, ricky raising his eyebrows at your reply. 

“why would you want to film a video when we could just make out?” he said, earning himself a glare and a light, harmless slap on the chest, with you watching the way his lips curled into a smirk in the mere corner of your eye. is this guy fr? yes.

“as if you don’t try to every chance you get,” you said, rolling your eyes yet smiling playfully afterwards. “isn’t that right my lovelicky?” 

suddenly getting flustered at the nickname, that smirk of his disappeared in a flash, ricky’s ears giving away his reaction the moment they turned a deep shade of red and his defined cheekbones were coloured pink. poking his right cheek, you laughed when his face went blank. 

“so, do you still wanna do it?” you questioned, standing up and getting ready to flee your spot, but your boyfriend was quick to pull you back down, tugging you right into his lap, your hands automatically flying to his shoulders, steadying itself. 

“the tiktok or the makeout part?” he questioned, a smirk making its way back on his lips as he held your waist in place, tilting his face closer to yours.

“both.” 

the tiktok was long forgotten after that.

«────── « ⋅ʚ💋ɞ⋅ » ──────»

kim gyuvin !

“gyuvin, stop!” you squeaked, fumbling and grabbing on your boyfriends forearms, while trying to jump and retrieve your lipstick tucked away in his large hands. after showing him the tiktok that magically made it’s way onto your for you page, you asked if you both could hop on the trend. he agreed right away- but under one condition. 

to let him apply the lipstick on you.

“let me put it on you!” he insisted, hastily moving his hands out of your range, turning his back towards you, shielding himself.

“no! you’re gonna overline them and make me look funny!” you yelped, gyuvin trying to stifle a laugh. you continued to clutch, poke, and tug on him, but he didn’t budge, whining once he used his height to his advantage and lifted his hand above your smaller height, a teasing grin plastered on his lips. 

“damn you for being so tall.” you mumbled under your breath, stretching your arms and jumping, attempting to reclaim your poor liptint, failing completely. gyuvin’s smile only widened as he held the bottle by the brim, tauntingly dangling it above your head, making you want to slap him. 

“what was that?” he replied, leaning his face down to level with your height, while cupping his left ear and pretending to be unable to hear you.

using this chance of close proximity to your benefit, you abruptly placed a sweet, chaste kiss straight on his lips, the sudden move making gyuvin freeze in his tracks, eyes widening and mouth drooping open. the moment he unconsciously lowered his arm, you snatched the product out of his hand and scurried away while giggling, your boyfriend still in his frozen state. 

finally snapping out of it, he shook his head, his dark locks bouncing through the motion, and he glared at you with his wide eyes. “yah!” 

don’t worry, you soon both safely filmed the video, after he got back at you for tricking him. with a kiss of course.

«────── « ⋅ʚ💋ɞ⋅ » ──────»

 park gunwook !

“how does this go again?” your boyfriend asked you for the nth time, his body sprawled against your queen-sized bed- which was obviously too small for him. 

“unlock my phone baby. the video should still be open,” you replied from the corner of your room where your vanity was located. rummaging through the drawers, you have yet to find your favourite lip tint, the one that he likes so much. 

gunwook whined, reluctantly reaching his arm towards the nightstand, retrieving your phone easily with his large hand. inputting the special day you two started dating into the keypad (yes, that was your password), he was met with the sight of a couple holding each others faces, all covered in bright red lipstick. but what shocked him the most was who was in the video. 

“what the- junhyeon has a girlfriend?!” he exclaimed in surprise, face morphing into some sort of confused, yet disgusted expression. the video continued to play over and over again, and gunwook could only stare at it in shock, the overplayed sound clouding his ears.

after finally finding your desired liptint that was weirdly shoved away at the bottom of gunwook’s schoolbag, you ignored it and made your way over to your bed, watching the way your boyfriend threw random insults to your phone screen while scrolling through junhyeon's tiktok account. 

“since when could he pull?” he asked, eyes still locked with your device, sitting up when he felt you take a seat next to him, the bed dipping due to the added weight.

“for a while baby.” you replied, unfazed at the competitiveness between gunwook and his best friend. you gently slipped your phone out of his hands, and turned it off, putting it beside you as you settled down in the space in front of him. suddenly, he pulled you closer, making you shriek in surprise. he grabbed the lip tint from your hands and kissed your cheek sweetly.

“our video is gonna be much better.” 

«────── « ⋅ʚ💋ɞ⋅ » ──────»

han yujin !

yujin must be the shyest boy you’ve ever met, despite how tall he is. he could barely watch the full tiktok without wanting to turn away and cover his eyes.

but of course, he wasn’t gonna deny your request. 

“so...you’re just gonna kiss me?” he asked warily as you nodded at him, the both of you seated on the floor against your bed. 

“but more than once? all over my face?”

“yes silly.” you replied, playing with his dark hair gently, his larger frame leaning against your smaller one. he melted into your touch, heartbeat quickening each time you gently combed your fingers through his scalp. “it that okay with you?” 

“yes, yes! yes, it’s very much okay..” he murmured, his peachy nose turning pink, making you want to kiss it. 

“no need to be shy lovely. is the beige rose one okay?” you tilted your head so you could look up in his direction, loving the way his doe eyes sparkled, although they shifted away from your gaze.

“okay…” he replied softly, unconsciously fiddling with the sleeves of his jacket, causing you to smile at how endearing he was. finally bringing himself to look you in the eyes, he bit his lip. “can i atleast apply the lipstick on you before you kiss me?” 

“of course you can sweetheart.” and you caressed his cheek, placing a delicate kiss on his nose, turning your peachy boy into an actual peach. an extra ripe one.

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[writing-for-marvel]

Everyone’s Watching Him (But He’s Looking At Her) (3)

Actor!Bucky Barnes x Assistant!Fem!Reader

< < PART 2 | Series Masterlist | PART 4 > >

Summary: You’ve barely had time to recover from the controversial interview the night before, but it’s time for Bucky to step into the limelight yet again for his movie premiere.

Warnings: body insecurity and mention of reader sucking her stomach in, idiots in love, soft fluff, shy & insecure reader, jealousy, multiple POV switches, miscommunication, angst (yes, you read that right, though it’s me so you shouldn’t be surprised)

Word count: 4.6k (I may have gotten a little carried away)

A/N: photo credit to @justarandomgirly, banners by @vase-of-lilies

Main Masterlist | Ask me anything! | Taglist | Library

Sunshine creeps through the partly closed curtains, the brightness flickering against your closed eyelids causing you to wake from your serene slumber.

The bed is as soft as a marshmallow, and smells divine, like good quality fabric softener and an undeniable musky scent, which, when surrounding you entirely in the sheets, pillows and large duvet, is like coming home.

You’re still drowsy when you spread yourself out like a starfish, stretching all your joints that have become stiff with sleep. Which is when your brain kicks into gear and realises, in fact, this bed is much too large and comfortable to be your own.

Your eyes shoot open, and what you see confirms your suspicions that this indeed isn’t your bed. You’re met with a luxurious sized room, a large projector screen hanging from the ceiling against the wall opposite the king size bed and a chaise longue over in the corner beside a full length mirror.

Recognising it immediately as Bucky’s bedroom, you do a double take, checking to see if he’s in the bed beside you. You find your stomach sinks in disappointment when you realise you’re alone.

A soft meowing coming from the door catches your attention, but before you can shift positions too get a better look, a fluffy white cat jumps onto the bed and curls up beside your head. Much like his dad, Alpine was a little stand-offish at first, but once he became familiar with your presence, he’s been the most affectionate cat you’ve ever met.

“Good morning, handsome.” You murmur whilst reaching out to scratch under his chin. Alpine purrs in contentment. “C’mon, let’s see if your dad’s awake.”

James Barnes is of course not awake, though that doesn’t surprise you. He always needs a good eight hours of shut-eye, otherwise he’s in a horrible mood for the rest of the day.

Now that you’re wide awake, the memories of the previous night come back to you. In an attempt to distract Bucky from the chaos which would have been erupting online, you stayed up until four in the morning reminiscing, watching old movies and eating all the junk food in this extensive pantry.

Though from your last recollection you were still beside him on the couch, head resting on his shoulder as you became sleepy - you could only speculate that Bucky carried you to his bed after that.

You lean against the doorframe of his guest bedroom, coffee mug in hand and Alpine brushing against your leg as you take a moment to watch Bucky sleep. He looks so peaceful, his lips pressed together in a smile. You can’t prevent your mind from wandering to what exactly he dreams about when he closes his eyes at night, and the hope inflating like a balloon in your stomach that perhaps you have something to do with the subconscious smile he’s expressing.

After the ordeal the night before, you hate to wake him from the tranquillity he’s found for himself, rouse him into a day where all the headlines, both good and bad, will be about him, where his name will be trending on twitter, and all the gossip columnists will be speculating about who he’s dating and why he needs a prosthetic arm.

You wish you could protect him from the scandalous storm, but you also know he has a lot to do in preparation for his movie premiere tonight. The part of you who is employed as his assistant wins out this time.

“Bucky…” You coo gently from the doorway, hesitant to encroach on his personal space while he’s unconscious. You are just an assistant after all. Once you see him stir but not fully wake, you call softly again. “Buck, it’s time to get up.”

“Not yet.” He mumbles in response, making no effort to move or open his eyes, let alone get out of bed. You chuckle at how adorable he is when he’s tired. Most people would consider it being grumpy, you actually find it endearing.

“I made coffee.” You know those are the magical words to get Bucky Barnes moving for the day. He finally opens his eyes and they instantly meet yours, all you can think about is being the first thing he sees every single morning for the rest of his life.

“Thanks.” He says with a soft smile. “I’ll be right out.”

* * *

Bucky is still getting dressed when the doorbell rings.

He’s not expecting anyone, but he’s sure it’s just Maria coming over with last minute directives concerning the premiere tonight. A shiver runs down Bucky’s spine at the thought of stepping out in front of all those cameras again so soon after last night's debacle. It’s horrible timing really, but he doesn’t exactly have a choice but to attend, however reluctantly.

He’s buttoning up his shirt when he hears the distinctive sound of a toddler laughing, and he instantly knows who has paid him a visit.

When he exits his bedroom he’s met with four smiling faces. You, his darling sister, his best friend and their beautiful daughter.

“Buba!” She calls, not quite able to say his name yet.

“We thought we’d pop around after everything that happened last night. Much like her favourite uncle, Jamie has an infectious smile, and we think you could use some of that today.” Becks comments as she tickles her daughter's tummy, making her giggle. Bucky finds that contagious smile spreading over his features as his sister hands him Jamie, who, by the way she’s squirming in his grip, seems very happy to see her uncle.

He didn’t know it when he woke up this morning, but this is exactly what he needs to take his mind off yesterday’s disaster and his impending public appearance tonight.

You offer to leave, so he can spend time alone with his family, but he’s adamant that you stay. Bucky’s sure he will only ever be able to find true contentment and happiness with you by his side, because when you’re elsewhere, there will always be a fragment of himself missing.

The rest of the morning is filled with smiles, laughter and pure joy. His schedule has been so busy the last couple months with finishing the production of the movie in a different city and the press tour, that there’s a lot to catch up on in little Jamie’s life, as well as that of her parents.

“When are you going to tell her?” Becks asks in a low voice as the two of them make lunch in the kitchen, but Bucky can’t take his eyes off the scene playing out in the living room. He’s far too invested in watching you babble, laugh and play with his niece, the miracle his sister and best friend named after him, to care about anything else in the world.

“Tell her what?” Bucky asks, not paying enough awareness, even to his own sister, to figure out what she’s implying.

“That you’re in love with her.” This, however, does capture his attention and are perhaps the only words Becks could have uttered in order for him to take his focus from you.

“How do you know?”

“The way you look at her. Like she’s everything you’ve ever wanted and all you’ll ever need. Everything you’ve waited for.” Bucky chuckles, his sister knows him too well for her own good and he knows there’s no point in trying to deceive her - she also happens to be far too smart for her own good too.

“How come I could never see that between you and Stevie before you told me you loved each other?” It was the love found between his sister and best friend that made Bucky truly believe he too could find a love with someone that would transcend the remainder of his life. It may have taken him a couple years after that, but he then finally met you, and all fell into place.

“Because you were oblivious. Still are actually.” It’s now Becks’ turn to chuckle, but in a way that makes Bucky feel like he’s missing some vital piece of information.

“Why still?”

“Because you clearly don’t realise she’s in love with you too.” Bucky's entire world stops. All he can feel is his heart thumping so forcefully in his chest it might burst at any moment.

“You think- no, no she isn’t… is she?” Only in his fantasies do you return his affections. He’s dreamed, sincerely hoped, that bashful smile and twinkle in your eye when he says anything remotely flattering about you is an indication of something beyond friendship, but he’s never let himself fully believe that in fear of having his heart completely crushed.

Could you really love him?

“She’s the one who invited us around today, she thought seeing your family would be just the spark you need.” And that’s when he thinks his heart stops completely. You organised this? Without him asking or prompting in any way - you simply did it because you thought it would cheer him up? You knew exactly what he needed, what would brighten his day and you were content not taking the credit as long as he was happy?

“Buck, take it from someone who waited far too long to tell the person they loved that they indeed loved them - don’t wait. Stevie and I danced around it for years because he’s your best friend and I’m your sister. If you love her, tell her. It might just be the best decision you’ve ever made. It was for me.”

And with that Becks pats Bucky on the shoulder and leaves him with his l thoughts as she joins her daughter for feeding time.

Tonight. I’ll tell her tonight, Bucky pledges to himself with a new found surge of courage.

He just needs to get through the anxiety of this damn movie premiere without someone asking him why he’s missing a limb before he does.

* * *

After you bid farewell to the Rogers family, realisation sets in that it’s time to prepare for the premiere. You can tell by how tense Bucky’s shoulders are that he’s not looking forward to the occasion, which is a shame because he’s put so much time and effort into making an entertaining film for it to all be ruined by one bully interviewer.

And that’s what you attempt to remind him of, but to no avail. There’s a sharp, stabbing pain in your gut at the thought that, at least this time, you’re not enough to be able to cheer him up.

However begrudgingly, Bucky allows you to take him meet with his stylist for the final reveal of his attire for the night. After the award show season, he wants to go with a slightly different look, and Bucky seems to welcome the change.

“What do you think?” Bucky asks, strutting out in a navy blue suit with a cummerbund, doing a performative twirl just for you which makes you chuckle.

“I much prefer when I get to help you with a tie.” Is what you say, because you’re sure if you try to articulate how gorgeous he looks you’ll end up admitting he’s the most handsome man you’ve ever laid eyes on. The memory of helping you fix his tie last night flashes in your mind and your cheeks heat at simply the recollection of being that close to him.

“I’ll have to remind the stylist only suits with ties from now on.” Bucky smiles, his hands twitching in a way you hope indicates he wishes you were within proximity to touch. “Oh, I also have a surprise for you!”

He ducks back into the dressing area and for the minute it takes for him to return, excitement and suspense grow in your stomach. When Bucky comes back, he has a garment bag in his hands and a cheeky grin on his face.

“Try this on for me.” You try to protest, to object to him having spent any amount of money on you, but when he forces the garment into your arms and directs you to the dressing room with his large hands on your waist, you’re putty in his hands.

“Can you zip me up please?” You ask nervously, as you walk back out to model the gown for Bucky. You turn around and a wave of vulnerability overcomes you as he stares at your bare back. He slowly makes his way over to you, hands careful as he zips up the gown.

He looks at you in awe, but you’re sure it’s just because he’s used to seeing you in a pair of jeans and a band tee rather than an elegant dress.

“Bucky, I can’t accept this… this is far too beautiful and expensive.” You advise, though you're too busy admiring how the dress fits in the reflection of the mirror to fully appreciate the absolutely enamoured expression he’s regarding you with.

“Doll, it was made just for you, you wouldn’t want it to go to waste would you?” He says with a smile, unable to take his eyes off the dress and how perfectly it fits your body. He knows he’s going to have not so innocent dreams about it tonight.

“Thank you Buck, I promise I’ll pay you back.”

“No, you’ve already done so much for me, more than you know, please, let me do this for you.” You don’t push the matter any further, but make sure to express your gratitude again before leaving for the premiere. After feeling so out of place during the recent award show season, it means the world that Bucky would do this for you.

You feel confident in your custom dress when you arrive, not only because the gown you’re wearing actually fits you properly, unlike every other second hand dress you’ve worn to important events, but because of the way Bucky looks at you while you’re wearing it.

But when you get separated, him moving to the red carpet along with all the other exquisitely dressed celebrities and notable attendees, and you with the behind the scenes help, the distance between you allows space for doubt and uncertainty to creep in.

You watch Bucky greet his co-star, the gorgeous Sharon Carter. You can’t deny it, she looks absolutely stunning. Perhaps more than stunning, if that’s possible. A woman out of a man’s sexual fantasy.

A fire red dress plunges down her front, a long slit in the side shows off her tall, slim legs and taught material over her abdomen and hips leaves no room for questioning how flat her stomach is and the desirable curves of her waist. It makes you suck your stomach in, suddenly overly insecure about how your body looks in your gown.

It’s hard to breathe watching Bucky looking at her with such a genuine smile and an eagerness in his eyes that you could only describe as attraction. And that even though they’re in front of flashing cameras and being recorded for the entire world to see, you can see that he’s not feigning a second of it.

Everyone in attendance is abuzz with comments of how dashing they both look, but more notable, what a breathtaking couple they make.

Bucky’s hand slides lower and rests on the curves of her waist, making jealousy spread through your body and stomach churn with insecurity.

The ache in your chest is the painful reminder that it is only in your imagination where he is yours, even if in every version of reality you will always be his.

From that moment on you find it difficult to truly concentrate on the importance of the occasion, or the anticipation of seeing a blockbuster film before the majority of the world. You’re too caught up in the self doubting thoughts bouncing around your head like in a pinball machine.

The movie itself goes by in a blur. You try your best to remind yourself that Bucky’s playing a fictional character, but it’s difficult to sit through two hours of the sexual tension between him and Sharon which ultimately ends in a steamy sex scene.

The chemistry between them is tangible and you recognise that spark in his eye on the big screen as the same way he looked at her on the red carpet. It’s easy to convince yourself that there will never be that electrifying magnetism between you two when not only have they shown it while filming a movie for six months, but also have exhibited it right in front of your eyes tonight.

By the time the movie ends, it feels like someone’s sitting on your chest, every breath agonising, even though you have no right to be jealous. He’s not yours, he’s your boss, he’s never vocalised any romantic interest in you and quite clearly he’s capable of doing much better than you anyway.

The first person Bucky hugs as the credits roll is Sharon. Seeing him find solace in her arms is enough to push you to the edge - you need to get out of here.

As the cast is preoccupied by all the recognition and acknowledgements, you take the window of opportunity to slip out the side door, needing the fresh air and space between the setting bringing you so much anxiety.

You think you’ve escaped inconspicuously until you hear a door closing behind you. The way Bucky’s voice calls your name is like a warm embrace in the cold, lonely night and compels you to stop.

“Where are you going?” He enquires as he catches up to you, a confused furrow in his brow.

“I’m sorry Bucky, it was all becoming a bit too much for me in there, I just want to head home.” The concern brimming in his eyes is enough to make your knees weak and for you to forget that you’re actually incredibly insecure and jealous right now. Bucky knows you don’t like crowds so that’s the excuse you’ll stick with.

“Doll, why didn’t you just tell me? Let me drive you.” He offers thoughtfully without any further questioning.

“Bucky this is your night, you should be celebrating with your friends not driving me anywhere.” Your last wish is to inconvenience him, that’s why you attempted to leave unnoticed, because in the back of your mind you knew Bucky’s benevolent enough to try something like this on a night that should instead be dedicated to him.

“I want to make sure you get home safe. Please.” He looks at you with those puppy dog eyes you intrinsically know you’ll never be able to say no to, those same eyes which regard you with a tenderness you’re only familiar with from him, that make you feel more beautiful and treasured than all of the precious gemstones money can buy.

“Okay.” It should perhaps concern you how quickly you yield to him, but the elated smile which forms on Bucky’s face as you do is reward enough for conceding so easily. That, and the knowledge that if he’s with you, he’s not with Sharon.

“Thank you!” He exclaims, as if you’re the one doing him the favour instead of the other way around. His large hands cup your face as he leans in and kisses your forehead, much too quickly for your liking because before you’re even able to savour the feel of his touch he’s pulling away and rather all you can feel is the cold absence of where his contact was the moment before.

Bucky can see the shiver which runs down your spine and shrugs off his jacket before you even have the opportunity to protest.

“Here, take this, can’t have you feeling cold.” He places the large jacket around you without hesitation, making sure the shoulders are aligned correctly before his hands smooth down your arms before finishing in your hands. His proximity makes you feel dizzy and you’re suddenly hyper aware of how sweaty your palms are. Bucky looks down at you, eyes briefly flickering down to your lips as he licks his own, before settling on your eyes. Your desire to kiss him is about to overrule every professional instinct you’re attempting to exert, when he opens his mouth to speak. “Just wait right here, I need to say a quick goodbye to some people but I’ll be right back to take you home. I promise.”

He squeezes your hands as reassurance and before you’re even able to process the glint in his tender eyes, he’s disappeared inside.

You pull his jacket tighter around you as the wind picks up, losing yourself in the same captivating musky scent you were surrounded by this morning in his bed sheets. It’s soothing and reminds you that it was in fact you who was comforting him last night when he broke down. Not Sharon. You.

“Are you heading off?” A familiar voice asks. You look up to find Maria taking a drag of a cigarette, and for a rationale you’re unsure of, your grip on Bucky’s jacket becomes tighter.

“Yeah, Bucky’s driving me home.” You say with a smile you can’t suppress.

“Oh darling, he can’t leave the celebrations yet. He’s the star of the show!” Maria takes one last puff of her cigarette before she stamps it out with her red bottom shoes you’re sure cost more than your month's rent.

“But he-”

“Besides, I’m sure he’d much rather go home with his girlfriend.” If her words don’t kill you first the nonchalant tone she uses to implode your entire world just might.

“Girlfriend?” You choke out.

“Sharon - I mean, you saw how cosy the two of them were today? They’ve gotten awfully close after all those long months playing love interests.” Simply hearing her name makes your heart clench and brings back the suffocating envy you were feeling mere minutes ago.

“I guess.” Is all you can manage to say.

“Look, darling, you’ve had a long couple days working, you should head home! There’s a taxi rank just around the corner.” Maria almost pushes you forward, but with how weak and pliant you’ve become with self doubt, your body puts up no resistance. You mumble a quick goodnight before your feet shuffle you the rest of the way to the cab stand.

There was a small part of you that hoped, perhaps even believed, that Bucky reciprocated the overwhelming feelings of love and devotion you held for him.

Over time you’ve needed to syphon off larger and larger segments of your heart to be able to store your ever growing feelings for him and all the memories you’d made with him you refused to forget, until you realised that small section had instead become your entire, overflowing heart.

And you pondered that when Bucky looked at you like he didn’t even want to blink in fear of missing out on a single second with you, perhaps that’s what he was doing too.

But why should you trust your instincts when they’ve led you astray so many times before? When all it’s resulted in was the pain of heartbreak and rejection.

Why would Bucky Barnes, renowned playboy and the biggest movie star in the world, be any different?

To your dismay, it turns out he isn’t.

* * *

Bucky leaves the celebration with a pep in his step.

He’s going to take you home and tell you how he feels.

He can’t help the nervous twisting of his stomach at the thought of baring his heart to you. Revealing that his soul has become intertwined with yours and you carry his fragile heart wherever you go, but that there’s simply no one else in the entire world he wants nor trusts more to have that privilege.

He’s about to reveal his most closely guarded secret, open his heart and expose his most vulnerable side to you with the prospect of complete rejection. And as much as it scares him half to death, he’s taking his opportunity. Becks believes you love him, and that’s about as sure as he can be.

When Bucky rounds the corner, Maria is standing alone exactly where he left you and his heart squeezes tightly with anxiety.

“Where is-”

“She left, said she needed to get home and didn’t want to wait for you.” Maria informs flatly, but Bucky can’t believe it. You’re always so patient, so accommodating to his insanely hectic schedule, had you really grown tired of waiting on him?

“She left?” Bucky can hear the distress in his own voice. He looks around, desperately confused, feeling an abyss being carved into his chest as the realisation of your departure sets in.

He told you to wait right here.

He promised he’d be right back.

He was going to tell you he loves you…

Even though Maria confirmed otherwise, part of him expects to see you standing there, wearing his jacket over your shoulders and that shy smile of yours which makes his stomach perpetually flip. But there is nothing aside from the faint music reverberating from inside, and a cool breeze that reminds him you’ve left with his jacket, and his heart, without so much as a goodbye.

“She’s off the clock Bucky, no wonder she wants to go do her own thing, she’s not getting paid to cater to your every whim 24 hours a day. Besides, this gives us a chance to chat. I have to talk to you about Sharon Carter.” Maria platonically drapes her arm around Bucky’s shoulders and directs him back inside without knowing her words are like a knife to his chest.

Of course you want to do your own thing, you have a life outside of being his assistant, you don’t want to be around him every second of every day working. That’s why you were in such a rush to leave tonight.

How could he be stupid to mistake you doing your job for anything more?

“What about Sharon?” He doesn’t want to deal with any work talk right now, all he wants is to go home and nurse his bruised heart by himself.

“I’ve talked with her management, and we’ve agreed to push the angle that you two are dating.”

“No, Maria, I don’t want to do that, I’ve had enough of PR relationships.” You are all he wants. Bucky doesn’t want to have to hold hands, kiss and be excessively affectionate with someone else when it’s really you he wants to be able to do all those things, and more, with. He finds his palms are sweating at the mere thought of being able to do that with you, even if you don’t want that with him.

“James, it’s already in motion. Everyone’s speculating about who you’re dating after last night's interview, so we pushed the story before the red carpet tonight to drum up buzz about the movie. It’s perfect timing!”

Dread settles in the pit of Bucky’s stomach. The next week will be filled with press for the new movie and he’s going to have to play the part of Sharon’s devoted boyfriend when all he craves is to be yours. This was a nightmare he desperately wanted to wake up from.

Two hearts, connected in a way even their owners don’t understand, go to sleep that night feeling more alone and unloved than ever before, when in actuality they both dream of the same thing: being with each other.

Part 4 > >

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Everyone’s Watching Him (But He’s Looking At Her) [Actor!Bucky Barnes] Taglist: @sunnyjane4 @ravenodindottir @valhalla-kristin @learisa @crispysublimecupcake @iamfandomwasted @blackwidownat2814 @hailey-holt @rosepetalsinwinter @wifeofbarnes @bucky-fricking-barnes-reads @vicmc624 @oliviagreen99 @gabshouse @raging-panda @priya212 @highlyintelligentblonde @buckyseddie @erynnnn @endless-summer-soldier @one-shot-plus-size @takeabreathdearh @its703pm @nefelibatansoul @theweekndhistorybook @albinotigerpython @goldenharrysworld @buckyslove1917 @supersanelyromantic @gothkitteh @ahrahrahraha @hopelessromantic423 @misshale21 @happeevacationday @farfromjustordinary @blackgirlbydna @mrsgweasley @readreblogfics @ashenc-blog @redbarn1995 @thewackywriter @missvelvetsstuff @broadwaybabe18 @buckys2lut @arny-montana @calirindo @justfic

[upon-a-starry-night]

Number Neighbors Pt.27

Natasha Romanoff x Fem! Reader

Natasha Masterlist Series Masterlist

Word Count: 1.2k

Summary:  When you catch sight of the newest trend going around you know you’re all but bound to at least try it, it was harmless anyway. What could possibly stem from something so little?

----

Nat’s been more than exhausted these past few weeks as she drafts up argument after argument that she can use against the government to justify why she and her fellow Avengers shouldn't be put on a leash. She knows it’s a long shot and she doesn’t have enough witness accounts or evidence yet but she’s been hearing about the crime rate spike through the rumor mill and she hopes that soon enough she’ll have enough to come back.

She can bring her family back and finally have you. If you’ll still have her after all of this is over. She knows you’d have every right to be mad but she hopes you’ll understand enough to at least let her take you on one date.

The rain pelts outside of her window as it has been for the last three days and she sighs as she lies back on her pull-out bed. If it were under different circumstances she might’ve been able to appreciate the break from the city and the pressure. Maybe she could even come back to these woods with Clint, or Wanda, or…You.

She’s working hard to make sure her family is safe, yes, but she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t working this hard to also see you again. To finally know what it feels like to hold you, to run her fingers through your hair, and hear you laugh again. The thought of you has been the only thing that’s brought her comfort these past few weeks.

Her computer dings with an email and she shoots up immediately, grabbing the shiny object from the side table next to her and pulling it onto her lap. She wasn’t expecting any emails while she was out here and her mind jumped to the worst-case scenario: they’d found her location.

The email is from an unknown sender which only makes her more uneasy and she’s more frustrated than anything that she’ll have to find a new place to hide when she recognizes the encrypted link hidden in the email's coding.

It was a website Clint had created just for the two of them to communicate in case there was ever a situation similar to this. She’s afraid to admit just how comforting it was to hear from someone close to her after weeks of no contact. She quickly opens the website and reads the messages.

Clint-

Hey Natty, hope you’re having fun wherever you’ve parked that trailer of yours, Tony’s been a real pain in the butt but we’re trying to negotiate some better terms with some government officials. I know you’re probably working on a solution of your own but I’ve got to at least pretend like I contribute to this group-

She snorts at the self-jab, knowing her fellow Avenger couldn’t care less about the insults people say about him being the least skilled Avenger. She always admired that about him.

Clint-

Anyway, your phone’s been blowing up. I think Tony is getting suspicious so I took it and hid it in my room. I think you’re gonna be in deep shit with your girlfriend when you get back haha. 

I attached the voicemails you’ve been getting, I didn’t listen to them but I saw who they were from. Thought they might be important.  

Nat’s heart pounded as she stared at the attached files, there were at least 30 voicemails from you varying in different lengths and part of her was scared to open them. There was no doubt a few of them were just you yelling at her but even then she’d missed the sound of your voice so much that she’d take your irritation over anything else.

She hesitates over the first voicemail with her cursor but clicks it before she can sike herself out. There’s a little bit of silence and she wonders if you’re going to talk before she hears a small sniffle and her heart breaks. She swore to herself she’d never make you cry and now she’d failed, the sound of your quiet crying echoing throughout her trailer only amplifying her defeat.

It's another thirty seconds before your voice finally breaks through. It’s rough and raw and she can tell you’d probably been crying for a while.

“Nat? Where did you go? Why’d you leave? Listen- we don’t have to meet if you don’t want to. We can keep texting forever just don’t ghost me like this. Please.” It’s short and by how broken your last word sounded she can tell you were probably thrown into another fit of sobs after you ended the message. 

Nat doesn’t know what to do with herself, her body feels frozen and her heart won’t stop sinking further into her stomach. She’s never heard you sound so unsure of yourself before and it tears her apart that she’s the one who made you that way. It takes her a few minutes to muster up the courage to click on another one.

“What kind of person just says ‘I’m sorry?’ I deserve a better explanation than that! You couldn’t have at least lied to me about going to save baby animals in Africa where there’s no cell service? At least then when you stopped responding I could’ve felt better!” She’s not surprised that you’re mad at her, you deserve to be, but it doesn’t stop the guilt from gnawing at her chest when she hears how irked you are.

The next few are similar in the fact that they’re either angry or spoken through tears but they slowly begin transitioning into something else. Eventually, you stop talking about her leaving and start talking about yourself. What you did that day, what you’re making for dinner, the cat you’ve been visiting at the cat cafe. There’s still a hint of sadness in your tone but she can tell the calls are a form of therapy for you. A way for Nat to be there when she’s not really there.

She wants to be there. She wants to be the one you’re talking about your day with, wants to cook you dinner while you sit on the counter and visit the cat cafe with you. It hurts that she can’t do that and as she’s listening she feels her eyes burn with tears. She refuses to let them fall. She’s not the one who gets to cry in this scenario and yet her eyes refuse to give up their unshed tears.

There’s one last voicemail from a day ago and she clicks on it expecting it to be like the others but much to her surprise you’re talking about her again.

“I think I’m mad because I can’t even bring myself to hate you for it. I know you’ve probably got some shit going on. I understand that, trust me. But- I don't know you could’ve… maybe it’s too much of me to ask you to fill me in on the situation- or let me know when you’d be back… Is this goodbye?” 

 Your static voice rings out into the silence and Nat hates how you sound. Reserved- almost accepting. Like you’ve convinced yourself she’s never going to respond again and she hates it. She hates that she made you so insecure that you think she isn't spending every hour thinking of you and how to get back to you. 

The sound of your voice fills her with even more determination as she begins redrafting her court argument. She was going to come back to you, you just had to wait for her a little longer.

Pt.28

A/n: Aww Nat :( ~ Starry

---Taglist--

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[somefanchick]

-Riddle Me This-

(This story is from Riddle's perspective anytime the events of book two. I only know information from the English server story and events so sorry if anything is terribly out of character. This fic is platonic and is cannon for my Yuu-sona, but I do just call them Yuu in the story. Hope you enjoy! Ps. There is a little bit of cussing. I do not own the picture <3)

I couldn’t help but feel guilty. My overblot was the first of many, and they've had to deal with all of them. It was infuriating that I had started a trend of trouble that was pilled onto Yuu’s lists of tasks. Of course it wasn’t completely my doing. However the more it happened, the more something in the back of my mind said I needed to make it up to them.

Trey asked me to deliver a caramel apple tart to them so I was doing just that. Normally he would ask Ace and Deuce, but they had to feed the flamingos. He then looked at Carter, but I insisted on doing it myself. I had noticed that Yuu seemed distant during lunch. They were staring into the distance, clearly not looking at anything or listening to their group of friends as they slowly spooned some soup into their mouth. 

I rang the doorbell only to be met with silence. I knew that they had to be in their dorm because that’s where they always are when they weren’t doing a task for the headmaster or going to class. I admired how determined they were to improve their living accommodations with their own blood, sweat, and tears. They seemed insulted when Trey had previously offered his help in the endeavor, so I had never asked myself, but I knew Ace and Deuce had found some way to help them without them refusing or being hateful about the assistance.

I rang the doorbell once again, only to be met with silence once more. My gut told me to try the doorknob, so I did. The door opened with barely any resistance. 

“Yuu? It’s Riddle,” My voice came out weak and uncertain, I was shaken by the easy entry, “I brought a tart.”

I looked in the living room to find Grim asleep on the couch, a small fire lit in the fireplace. Yuu was still nowhere to be seen. 

“Why hello,” I jumped when the ghost started speaking out of nowhere, “You’re Housewarden Rosehearts right?”

“Yes,” I composed myself quickly, “I came to drop this off on behalf of my vice-warden. Where is Yuu?”

Another ghost made his way over, “I’d put the tart in the kitchen, Yuu isn’t exactly in the mood to see visitors right now.”

My gut twisted, "Are they okay? Where are they?”

The smallest ghost made his own appearance, “We don’t know. They kicked us out of their room. They've been there since class ended today.”

“They kicked Grim out too,” The first ghost crossed his spectral limbs, “That’s how we know they're in a bad mood, not just napping.”

“Thanks for letting me know,” I made up my mind. I had to trust my gut.

I left the ghosts and placed the tart in the refrigerator in the kitchen. The fridge was pretty empty, only leaving some juice that I knew Ace had brought last time they had a movie night and some cans of Tuna hidden from Grim on the highest shelf. I was able to place the tart on a shelf alone.

I then made my way up to her room. It was oddly quiet with Grim and the ghosts staying downstairs. I could see that Yuu was in the middle of remodeling some of the smaller rooms, airing them out and leaving their dorm as the only one closed.

“Yuu,” My gut was pushing past my manners, something told me that this was more important, “It’s Riddle.”

“Didn’t the ghosts tell you to leave me alone?” Their voice was a weak hiss, “I can’t do it right now.”

“Do ‘it’?” I was confused, “Yuu what is going on?”

 “Just leave me alone,” Yuu was a bit louder, then they mumbled something I couldn’t hear even though I was right behind her door.

“Can I come in?” I put my hand on the handle, “I need you to talk to me.”

“Why won’t you go away!?” They screamed suddenly and my body stiffened.

I opened the door.

They sat on the floor like it was the center of the storm. Windows had the curtains drawn so the room was as dark as it could be in the middle of the day. The room had clothes scattered rabidly, uniforms and other pieces of clothing that I recognized from school events scattered among the bed sheets that had been pulled from the bed erratically where they hung off the bed. I could tell that Yuu's room was normally clean but they had managed to tear everything onto the ground and wreck the place as if they were a hurricane. Something in my heart hurt when I realized the destruction reminded me of the Heartslabyul garden after my overblot. 

“Go away,” They was mumbling but now I could hear them, “It isn’t real. I have to wake up.”

“‘Isn’t real’?” I approached with caution, “Yuu what are you talking about?”

“This!” They gestured all around themselves without really thinking, “It’s not real. It can’t be real. People don’t-” They were struggling to breathe, but they weren’t crying, “People don’t care about me like this. That’s not how it works. This is all just some stupid dream. I can’t get attached. I can’t. I can’t-”

They was having a panic attack. I had not had one since I was a kid and they were never properly dealt with, so I had no idea what was appropriate. It also confused me because what they were saying didn’t make sense. “‘People don't care about me like this.’” “‘This is all just some stupid dream.’” “‘It’s not real.’”

Yuu, while somewhat blunt and egotistical, was one of the most beloved people in the school. It had become rare that people would mess with them for the sole fear of the repercussions from them or those that cared about them. They helped so many people through difficult times. They were smart, cunning, ruthless, caring, fierce, and loyal beyond most people at this school. Why wouldn’t people care about them?

“Yuu,” I tried to mimic Trey’s comforting tactics as I had seen him do with me, other students, and his siblings on the rare occasion that I saw them. I kneeled down to reach their level and tried to get them to focus on me without touching them, “I’m going to need you to name five things you can see.”

They froze for a moment and I was afraid I had somehow made it worse. But they looked me in the eye with some confusion before slowly glancing around the room.

“I see you,” They let out a breath, “I see my camera on the mantle, Grim’s bed, the cleaning supplies in the hallway, and the mess I made.”

I smiled, “I will help clean that up. Now I need you to name four things you can feel.” 

I saw their vision focus, as if their brain and eyes were realigning, “The wooden floor. The carpet. My clothes. Warm air.”

I nodded, “That’s it. What are three things you can hear?”

Their breathing slowed to a normal pace, “My breath,” they paused to listen, “That one branch outside my window banging against the building. And you.”

“Good job,” I watched as they stopped hunching over and moved to sit criss-cross, “Two things you can smell.”

They inhaled deeply, “Dust and cleaning supplies.”

I took a deep breath of my own, “And one thing you taste.”

“Toothpaste aftertaste,” They were grounded, “I haven’t eaten today.”

“I brought a tart from Trey,” I held out a finger, “Normally I wouldn’t approve of eating dessert for breakfast, but this is a special case.”

They laughed dryly, “Thanks Riddle. What kind of tart is it?”

“Caramel apple,” I shrugged, “He wanted to try a new recipe.”

“Nice,” They looked around at the mess, “Damn. I can’t believe I did this. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” I motioned to the clothes on the mirror, “You had to deal with my overblot. It’s only fair.”

“Merlin,” I could almost hear them grit their teeth as they rose to their feet, “I can’t believe-”

I rushed to stand so I could keep them from tumbling back to the floor, “Don’t rush yourself. I don’t want you passing out.”

“I’m so sorry,” They pulled themself off of me and sat on the bed, “I just- No. There's no excuse. I need to stop being stupid.”

“You weren’t being stupid,” I stood in front of them, “This kind of stuff is normal. You’re under a lot of stress and you don’t really have an outlet. Trust me. I get it.”

“You don’t,” they laid back on the bed, “I’m not from here. I’m from another world that is so different from this,” They let out another dry laugh, “People here are as bad as me, ego-wise. You all seem to care about me. Isn’t that insane?” They sat up, “I went from only two people in the world caring if I dropped dead, to dozens of people seeming to genuinely give a shit about my existence. Isn’t that insane?” I could see their eyes glossing over, like the panic and dread was settling back in, “I mean, I’m the same person. Why would people care about me now when I used to be so desperate to have a single person even acknowledge my existence without hating me? There’s no way it’s real right? I have to be in some kind of coma or something and this is some fever dream where people don’t hate me for existing. Right? Why would anyone like me? Let alone do things for me. I don’t-”

“Yuu,” I had to stop her from spiraling back, “This isn’t a dream,” I found myself trusting my gut once again and taking her hands in mine, “This is real. I don’t know what it was like in your world, but we care about you,” I let go of their hands, “I know Ace would have moved out of Heartslabyul if he wasn’t able to escape here with you and Deuce. And,” I looked down, “I probably wouldn’t have lived through my overblot without you.”

That seemed to bring them back again, “It’s real. All of it.”

“Yeah,” I sat down on the other side of the bed, “I’m sorry.”

“What are you saying sorry for?” Yuu stood, this time their legs supported them, “I’m the one who made a fool of myself. You-”

“Have made more than a fool of myself,” I smiled, “I overblotted. I was the first domino in the series of troubles you’ve had to face. And then I embarrass myself by forgetting you are human.”

“Excuse me?” They turned to look at me as I stood back up.

I made my way forward, “I forget you are human sometimes. You seem so ethereal. You work hard but it looks so easy for you. You handle our issues with ease, even though it has to take such a toll on you. And I’m sorry for that. You have your own issues and I think all of us forget that.”

They stopped looking at me, “Can we go eat now?”

“Yeah,” I could tell she didn’t want to talk about it anymore.

They stood and made their way out of the room. I followed behind, watching for any sign of further distress or panic. No one in the house seemed to notice Yuu had emerged from their room. They opened the fridge, retrieved the tart, and then moved to get the proper silverware for the food. 

That’s when I really got a look at them. Her clothes hung off her body awkwardly, as if they was far too small for the pajamas. Their hair looked like it hadn’t been washed in a while. Their eyes had bags and their legs shook slightly.

“I didn’t see any other food in the fridge,” I spoke softly as they began to cut the tart, “Do you need to go grocery shopping? I could go-”

“No I’m fine,” They spoke bluntly as they placed a slice of tart in front of me and began to get their own slice, “Crowley doesn’t give me food money until the end of this week. I don’t have enough to go shopping right now. Just enough for school lunches. And some tuna so I can get Grim to help out.”

“Yuu.”

They gave me my silverware and put the remaining tart in the fridge before sitting to eat their own slice, “Don’t lecture me on starving myself. That’s not what this is.”

They kept going without my prompt, “Look. I’m not used to this. It’s not so surprising that I think it’s some kind of fever dream. I’ve gone 18 years with only a few people caring if I lived or died. Now all of a sudden I come to a whole new world where that person is gone, but almost a dozen people seem to genuinely think I’m worth caring about. It's an emotional whiplash. I know I’m going to regret this but I’ve got to just get it out. I’m a horrible person. I’m not some saint like you seem to think. I’m an egotistical asshole who is a know-it-all and who was born with a silver spoon in her mouth. I’m ungrateful and spoiled. I’m just an adult who has no idea what to do and then I got sucked here and I am more confused than ever. I guess it all just bubbled over.”

“Yuu,” I took a bite of my tart and swallowed before speaking again, “If that is what you think of yourself then I think it wasn’t just your environment that changed.”

“What?” Yuu stopped eating and looked up at me, “I don’t change.”

I looked at them, “Could have fooled me.”

We ate the rest of the food in silence. Yuu was far from healed, but some part of me knew that what I had seen was sacred. It was an unspoken rule. No one else gets to know what I have seen and heard today. At least, not unless Yuu was the one telling them. I made a mental note to send Ace and Deuce here to spend some time with our magicless prefect with a large bag of healthy and nourishing foods.

[anemoiashifts]

permashifting & sv!c!dal ideation & early shiftok.

im so fucking scared to post this. tw.

ive been in the shifting community for four/five years now & most of my time was watching quietly from the sidelines up until last july when i made my shiftok account. i want to preface this by saying these are my experiences & observations & ive always been pretty firm on my stance. ive spoke about this (i think) twice on tiktok & will now give some updated insight. i don’t expect everything to agree with me but please don’t jump down my throat for saying what im going to. i respect you, please respect me. cool? yes? okay !!

there are similarities between sv!c!dal ideation & permashifting & im so so sick of people hardly taking about it. what re-sparked this interest in the topic was i saw someone make a video on their views towards the topic & i do resonate with their points heavily. this was the only video ive ever seen of anyone making a video like this minus myself & it’s been long overdue.

to clarify, im not against permashifting completely im against how permashifting is spoken about & how it’s promoted. it’s wayyy too casual & ive seen a lot of triggering things in my comment sections / confession submissions. i used to get about five of these or so (ppl saying they wanted to unalive themselves) a week when i was actively doing them but they’ve since kinda died down. if, me, an account with (at the time) ~15,000 tiktok followers were seeing this, i cannot imagine the kind of messages those 100,000 followers shiftokers were getting.

another thing that i haven’t spoke about too much is the sv!c!de notes id receive. i got about two or three of them. ignoring the overstepping of boundaries & oversharing, my heart goes out to those who submitted those. i think shifting came at a time when everyone was bored & cooped up inside & shiftokers could’ve unknowingly preyed upon people’s loneliness & vulnerability. i remember people could say things like “im k!11!ng myself tonight so I’ll wake up in my dr” & the fact that was even a thing is so beyond horrific. im gonna put some confessions ive gotten in the past just to show you what i was seeing daily at one point. scroll a ways down if you don’t want to to see. sorry ! idk how to blur it but would if i found out how to.

i wanta take a sec to call out all the adult shifters who neglected to speak about this.

i hear people say “but if they didn’t discover shifting they wouldn’t still be here” or “it buys people more time”. i get it. really, i do & i don’t think that’s a bad thing. what i do think the bad thing really is, is the adult shifting creators who enable the kind of talk & push that shifting is this other option without telling people to take care of themselves in this reality. the mental well-being & safety of people should always be put first, especially with spaces involving a lot of children when most of the information comes from the mouths of adults. shifting was popularized by tiktok at the height of c0v!d & everyone was arguably at their lowest. i think the timing in which shifting was introduced helped shiftok get popular at the time (along with harry potter trending, of course) & a lot of ppl saw it as a trend to latch onto & leech off of to grow a platform. i think some people totally — probably unintentionally — took advantage of peoples desperation for an escape for profit. that’s what I’ve felt with some former / earlier shifting creators, anyways. that’s why shiftokers are seen as these figures that were/are looked up to so heavily because they’ve gotten something that people with destructive situations are so desperate for & i think that’s really diabolical & sad.

this post isn’t to shit on shiftokers completely, not the modern shiftokers anyway. i have some really cool mutuals who genuinely post insightful content. i think tiktok has gotten a little better with some bumps every now & then but it’s not as bad as 2020.

i don’t think shiftokers are doing this intentionally. & who knows ? maybe they’re are afraid their audience will get upset or off put or they’ll lose support but the longer we put the conversation off the more people’s mental health will worsen. whatever the reason may be, keeping numbers up or getting “canceled” isn’t worth it at the risk of lives of children. it’s long overdue.

then the idea of escapism comes in. escapism isn’t bad. arguably, most things we do are escapism; reading, scrolling on tumblr. its how we look & obsess & look at that escapism. that’s when it becomes unhealthy. the consept of shifting as an escape from something like depression can exacerbate those feelings of because people do struggle to actually shift. that state of “waiting” to shift can be extremely difficult if you’re not struggling mentally, so if you’re struggling mentally on top of trying to shift without success? also throwing being a minor onto that.

anyways this post was all over the place because i could talk about this for hours. i have no idea if this will ever have a place on tiktok or if I’ll even end up posting this to tumblr. this was very ramble-y but a very important ramble imo. i tried to organize & keep this short to the best of my ability. feel free to agree, disagree but these are my poorly organized thoughts.

a little reminder to enjoy the journey & process of shifting rather then hyper focusing on “the end” of it. take a break if you find you self only thinking about shifting and not doing stuff you gotta do here or if your making yourself sick over it. it isn’t the end of the world if you don’t shift. i believe everyone is here for a reason & i can promise you everything will work out in the end.

to those who resonate with mental health struggles & shifting, my heart goes out to you & only with you the best. be gentle with yourself — that goes for all of you.

[bitacrytic]

😂😂 oh my god!! Ming's 👁👁 is sooooo pretty ( Up's eyes really are that pretty huh?)

Though in all seriousness I assume ming is being all puppy dog eyes at this newcomer is because he is trying to observe this Joe. Like he knows something feels off, and so he is like 🔍🔍👀 at Joe, even when drunk!! He has been told by the Shaman that Joe is both alive and not, and it depends on him if he can see. So I assume that is what is making Ming eagle eyed on him.

Like Jim is already surveiling Joe. Ming knows he makes Joe nervous ( Joe kept messing up on his first day back as a stuntman). He either drops onto Tong's set because he knows Joe is there or maybe he is just paying Tong a visit. ( though it is clear it is only because of Joe, ming is going to be in the movie. He rejected Tong's offer before.) He shoots an ad with Joe, he shows up at the hospital when Joe doesn't answer Jim's call. So all in all, ming is like the tiktok trend of "why do I feel like, somebody's watching meeeee".

This is true.

He knows something is up with the new Joe and he's digging till he finds out.

But also, this is just another manifestation of his pattern of using someone to satisfy his craving for another person.

He could have been with anyone who wasn't a Tong stand-in but when Tong stood him up, he called Tong's stand-in.

He could have been with anyone who didn't remind him of Joe, but when he wanted a companion, he chose someone who reminds him of Joe. Even Jim offered to find him another person. He didn't even grace that suggestion with an answer.

Yes, you are right. He senses something is very weird about this new Joe.

But he could have investigated the issue without jumping dick-first into this new Joe.

He can't help himself.

[shyminmin]

༄𝐁𝐓𝐒 𝐗 𝐟.𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 | Fantasy, Mermaid AU | ༄𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 : 2.8k + ༄𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : Minor angst

"One iced Americano please" the mysterious man let out in a raspy voice as deep as the Mariana Trench.

All I could do was sit there and stare. It was like I was hypnotized or in some sort of trance.

His mis-matched attire did nothing to dampen his looks, in fact, in some crazy odd way, they seemed to complement and even enhance them. But that's coming from someone like me who hasn't the faintest clue on the in's and outs of fashion trends to begin with.

Sporting a lean, masculine frame under all those loose fitting clothes of faded greys and browns, areas of pale skin peeked out, holding an almost pearlescent sheen when hit by the light in a certain way.

A wide brimmed hat sat atop his head where strands of inky black hair poked out from beneath.

He stood there leaning against the bar counter, drumming his long, slender fingers onto its surface out of boredom, while he waited for his order. He exuded a level of power and authority which I couldn't quite place, making him all the more intriguing.

Who was this man and why was I getting so affected by him? Do random people who walk into cafes possess some hidden ability to render a person speechless.

Huffing I tried to maintain my composure.

Get it together Y/n! All he did was come in and order a damn coffee!

I was so absorbed in the scene in front of me that I couldn't help but jump in my seat when I felt someone's hand tap my arm.

"You with us lass?" Dongha's voice made me divert my gaze to him.

"S-sorry?" I let out, calming down from the surprise.

"Ah look at her, she was totally out of it."

"What were ye so immersed in?" The other two men chimed in.

"Uh...." Words were caught in my throat as I tried to come up with an excuse, not exactly wanting to say that I was ogling an innocent man, like some stalker.

I tried to speak again but was cut off from a distant voice.

"Your drink sir," I heard the cafe's barista say, making me once again look towards the newcomer.

Straightening his posture, he took the offered beverage, humming an inaudible 'thank you.' From his side profile I could see the slight upturn of his lips, emphasizing his knife sharp jawline. My heart did a flip at the imagery.

Oh boy, what is wrong with me!?

"Y/n dear, is everythin' alright?"

Still watching, the dark haired man dove deep into his pant pocket, pulling out an unusual small thatched pouch. Riffling through it, he took out a bunch of coins and handed them over to the server. My eyes must've been deceiving me at one stage as I could've sworn that amidst his change was an object, spherical in shape, that shone brightly against the rest. Dumbfounded about what I had spotted, I tried to make sense of it.

Who just casually keeps a pearl in amongst their money like it was nothing? It had to be a fake, right? Somehow I had a feeling my assumptions were false, it in fact being quite authentic. Once all the exchanges were finalized, the man suddenly turned so his face was now on full display, causing me to gulp at the sight.

Clear, smooth skin that has never been touched by the light of day and thin, moist lips that were sheltered by an adorable miniature nose. Soft looking cheeks that contrasted heavily with his sharp, angular brows that his dark waves covered most of like a curtain. But the most mesmerizing and jaw dropping thing of all was his-

Eyes...

Two slanted eyes, much like a cat's and the darkest shades of cerulean blue I have ever seen. Two that I was starting to get hopelessly lost within, like a whirlpool sucking me into it's swirling depths with no means of letting me go.

Suddenly they met my own, his pupils ever so slightly dilating resembling the darkest depths of the ocean itself. My heart proceeded to skip a beat at the intensity of his gaze, the air fleeing my lungs like a balloon deflating.

Oh my...

"Cheong Y/n!" All the fishermen shouted, trying to get my attention.

"I-I have to go to the restroom," standing up I made my way in the opposite direction of the male that had me so captivated.

"Lass, I advise that ya walk the other way if you don't want ta end up smack dab in a sack full o' flour."

Realising where I was heading from Myungsoo's warning, I swiftly turned, doing a 180 and locating the door to the women's bathroom, avoiding becoming a cheap knock off of the abominable snowman.

Why am I so flustered? My brain has turned to mush. I cursed myself for my mindless stupidity.

Reaching the wooden door reading 'Ladies' I pushed it open, letting out a sigh of relief when it closed behind me, evidently forming a barrier between me and the intense atmosphere of the cafe.

All the while though, before retreating to the safety of the bathroom stalls, I had the strangest inkling that two dark, brooding eyes were boring into my back, watching my every move. Whether that was a good or bad thing, I couldn't say.

Coming to this town sure is making several buried emotions and feelings I have never experienced before come to the surface.

Patting my cheeks, I tried to will away the redness, judging from the extreme heat I was feeling at the moment.

It had been close to ten minutes by the time I had regained my bearings and exited the bathroom. I discreetly scoped out the area, wondering whether the intense man was still there. I was almost prepared to set up camp in the bathroom if he was in fact still standing there making the air unbreathable with his presence.

Thankfully he appeared to have left, the only occupants being my unusual entourage and another random couple in the back, keeping to themselves. Noticing I had returned, the three elderly fishermen, who had been waiting expectantly, stood up rushing over to me. Their faces, one of worry and confusion.

"Ye ok? Ya sure took your time in there lil' lady,"

"Yeah I'm alright, n-never better" I tried to say as convincingly as possible.

"You sure? Ye lookin' a bit like tha clams we dig up n' stew. If you're not feelin' tha best, then we can take ya up there tomorrow," Dongha spoke not swayed by my fluctuating state.

Bringing my hand up, I used the back of it to skim against my forehead, a thin layer of sweat getting picked up from the action. This I could tell was not the kind you'd get from a general hot day.

Did he somehow cause me to get sick?

Coming to a decision, I sighed in resignation. "I might take you up on that offer... S-sorry to cut this journey short..."

Giving me a gentle smile, Dongha pat my head, "Don't ye worry yourself my dear, just focus on gettin' back your spunk. Now we'll be here bright n' early ta drive ye to Chin Chin's. The 'Seascape Inn' right?" He went to confirm where I was currently staying, in which I replied with a nod.

Gratefully smiling up at them all, I gave them a sincere 'thank you' as I waved and watched them walk casually out of the cafe's door, no doubt planning to get back to their planned fishing trip.

Sifting my bare feet through the powdery grains of white, I gazed absentmindedly at the steady rhythm that the waves moved in; coming in to kiss the shoreline only to be pulled back to reconvene with their greater family, the ocean as a whole.

It was always so calming to watch the natural flow of the ocean tides, dictated by the pull of the moon. Whether it be high or low, there was always that constant push and pull, ensuring one that life will keep moving even if you are at your best or worst.

And as long as the moon is there, then the waters have a reason to want to meet their lover, the shore, or are encouraged to reunite with their greater whole. The moon is their sole drive to put their intentions into motion and see that they see them to completion. It doesn't matter how much you may get pulled back, as long as you have that incentive to keep pushing forward, then one day you will surely be rewarded by your efforts and get your happy ending.

I will find my truth.. the whole truth..and hopefully my place in this challenging world..

I looked at the jagged lines of red that took up the entirety of my feet, fading as they wound up my ankles slightly. More questions arose.

Were these inflicted upon me however long ago or were they some strange deformity that I was born with? Medical reports state conflicting assumptions, not making my curiosity any easier to handle. My recurring dreams were the initial thing that spurred me on in this search for answers, however I couldn't ignore this other factor, that was the extensive scarring on my feet. I just knew it was linked to this somehow.

I usually kept them covered up, to avoid unwanted stares, but seeing as I was alone and on a damp, sandy shoreline I allowed myself the luxury of exposing them to the air.

Would Mr Yang know? Coming here is really the last option I have left at finding any hint about myself and origins. The true end of the road for potential revelations.

I dipped them gently into the shallow waters, the salty streams caressing the uneven skin of them like a mother embracing their child, soft, soothing and loving. I mentally praised myself for deciding to come down to the beach that the town was right on the edge of, the water and air certainly doing me some good at making me feel revitalized after how my body reacted to the events in the cafe.

The mysterious man weaved his way into my thoughts.

Maybe he was just passing through.. He seemed about my age, maybe a little older? I got the impression that most of the locals were elderly so he couldn't be from around here.

My heart proceeded to beat just thinking about him. I admit his appearance way surpassed the average norms of physical attraction, however I wasn't one to fall for someone purely based on their looks. That would make me kinda shallow.

No, instead it was some other accompanying reason...

Some other unknown reason that caused me to be drawn to him like the very waves lapping at my feet were beckoned towards Lady Selene herself.

I was in some strange predicament and I hadn't the slightest clue why.

I sighed, well even if this may be the case it's not like I'd find out, since I'd probably never see him again.

Amidst my deep contemplating thoughts the gentle breeze of the sea brought with it a faint but beautiful musical tune, a whistling flow of notes that sent tingles up and down my spine. I looked around trying to follow the melody to its source. My eyes and ears eventually led me to the highest peak of a cliff, which hung over the depths of the sea. Against the sunset, there stood a silhouette of a man, in his hands was a flute as he brought it up to his lips to continue on with his song.

My eyes raked over his outline as the enchanting sounds of his instrument washed over me, putting me into a deep serenity.

Flute glinting in the diminishing light, loose billowing clothes that got rumpled by the passing breeze, a nice lean figure...

Hold on..

Silent, intense aura...

Could it be?

That wide brimmed hat...

It's him!

As if the universe was confirming it for me, the last remnants of light from the setting sun cast upon him, lighting the man's body up and making his unique features visible. The man from the cafe stood there illuminated in all his ethereal glory, the last note of his unknown melody being blown out as he lowered his flute.

Wow... Was all that came to mind.

A sudden gust of wind swept along the beach, causing my hair to blow in all directions, and sea spray to jump up and dot my skin. I gasped at the disruption, wiping away the droplets that landed on my face and flattening down my brown locks. Because of all this, my view of the man had been obstructed. I was about to look back up towards him when a dash of colour zipped past my vision. There riding the strong breeze was a large, black hat.

I felt my eyes widen in realisation. That's not just any ordinary hat, that's His hat!

The strength of the wind must've blown it off his head. Pushing my feet down into the ground, I lunged forward, chasing after the item of clothing. Running in powdery, dry sand proved to be difficult as I almost lost my balance a couple of times, making grabby hands at the headwear only to stumble and grasp at empty air instead. All the while the hat seemed to mock me as it danced around in front of me. It would slowly float down towards the ground until I got close enough only to catch the next gust of wind, propelling it upwards again, casting a faint circular shadow onto me. If it was alive it would definitely be laughing at this pathetic game of cat and mouse we both found ourselves in. I grumbled out in irritation.

Get back here you dumb hat!

A few dozen attempts later, I found myself gasping for breath from the miniature workout I was getting from this stupid chase. I never knew I could loathe something as simple as a hat so much. Swiftly snatching up the object when it least expected it, I jumped up and down in victory, the item of clothing now safe and sound in my clutches.

Hah! Who's laughing now! I glared down at it.

"Now to get you back to your owner," I huffed out, lifting my head back up towards the cliff. Slightly nervous about interacting and coming so close to him, I gripped onto his hat like it was my lifeline.

Huh?

Scanning the now empty spot of land I realized he was gone.

There's something different about her, but he didn't know what. It caused him to become wary and guarded as he made his way to a secluded part of shoreline that was unreachable to the average human. Shrugging off his clothing and placing it amongst a couple of rocks where they couldn't be seen, the male waded in the shallow waters of the sea. When he was far out enough he sank his upper body into the salty depths, so that he was now completely submerged.

Taking a deep breath, he braced himself for what was to come next.

Seconds later, he gritted his teeth from the abrupt influx of pain that crashed upon him, holding back a shout as he felt his bottom half begin to mold together to form one elongated limb. Patches of skin hardened to form clumps of scales and his scarred feet dissolved and widened to form a brilliant powerful fin.

He always questioned himself why he bothered to step foot on land for limited amounts of time if every time he wanted to go, he had to experience this excruciating transformation.

He continued to clench and thrash his changing body around, trying to ease away the pain.

Maybe I should hold off on visits for a while... He voiced in his head. My energy is depleting...

However his thoughts were drawn back to the human female that he had encountered. He'd never seen her before around these parts and she exuded a different kind of energy than most other land dwellers that he had come across while blending in on land.

She radiated a sense of familiarity but also something that was uniquely her.

Dammit! I shouldn't be getting caught up in the lives of humans.

Those oblivious beings were usually the ones who'd find themselves enchanted by his kind's very presence, not the other way around.

As the minutes passed by, the crippling pain slowly subsided, eventually stopping completely. The merman let out a sigh of relief, praising the gods that it was over.

Oof... I almost blacked out this time...

Steadily regaining his strength and movement, he kicked his fluke up and down creating momentum and smoothly shot forward into the great expanse of deep blue, towards his cave where he could relax and settle down for the night.

I shouldn't resurface, but for the love of Amphitrite, she has my hat!

| 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 | 𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 | 𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭 | ༄⋆

[rainpudding]

YAN! SCARA X READER

THE SWEETEST ICING

chapter eight

chapter index

- the last chapter before the epilogue, this chapter is shorter than the one before, please if you have any questions regarding the book, or anything related please post them in the comments or send me a dm I'm so happy to be here with u guys. Also since this book was written before any scaras lore he can be a bit ooc, i tried fixing him in this chapter making him seem like he was a good person in the past but i lowkey feel like I failed to show that. I hope you still enjoy the chapter nonetheless.

Breath hitches in your throat as worries flood your heart and dumb little mind. You breathe deeply trying to shake away the fear that is buried in your chest. The sun shines brightly making sweat form all over your body as you grip the inazuman flower boutique.

There is a classical music band that was hired by Scaramouche in the background, they're playing soft and quiet music building a lovely atmosphere. violin mixes with quiet whispers and gossip you step back, your brows furrow in pain when you feel an edge of a knife on your back, threatening to cut through your clothes and skin, ready to draw out blood. You look behind your shoulder to see the Russian ginger smiling sincerely, his eyes dark with a hint of madness, the knife is hidden under his sleeve, away from the wandering eyes of the guests but still here for you to feel, a hint that there is no escape.

You step back forward your eyes becoming teary, your eyes meet  Dottore who is standing behind the altar, his smile widening as he sees your fear. You gulp your pride your hands lightly shaking, your press harder onto the boutique. Finally, you step forward, your shoes clicking against the decorated stairs.  The music explodes now being loud, people start clapping and cheering, and harbingers sip their wine gossiping.  The icing mage in the crowd waves at you sparkles in her eyes as she jumps trying to make you see her, when you look at her she shows thumbs up.

When you're finally at the top of the stairs, on the podium where the altar is, you finally breathe out. Scaramouche is by your side, he hums in approval as he can sense your presence. "Finally, always have to make a scene don't you, a grand entrance they call it," Scaramouche sighs, surprisingly not angry. He seems weirdly relaxed, your muscles tense. Normally he would start making a scene, educating you and stuff, but now that you stand next to him he seems happy not minding the fact you came late and tried to back away a few times.

"Feeling shy? Tire of your fake pride already," he is pressing your buttons, and he knew it. His smile says it all. "Fake pride? Like you know any better," you bite onto your lip,  your hands curl into the fabric of your clothes. "What is all this, you don't see me for three years, we become complete strangers and suddenly you want to marry me? Don't you realize how big of a commitment this is? Has your brain decomposed since we last saw each other? Or is this some trend that harbingers now do," you spat, your heart hurt threatening to break apart, your chest felt heavy and you felt awfully hot, cold sweat rolled down your forehead as you tried to stay as quiet as possible but still express your anger.   Scaramouche seemed unaffected by your brattiness, in fact, he seemed lifeless like he couldn't get why you were so angry.

Before he could calm you down or answer Dottore coughed loudly, discarding the tense atmosphere," the guests are growing impatient should we start?"

Scaramouche nodds a glaze lily decorating his hair. Just now you noticed that you carried a boutique of flowers from his homeland, and he had his hair decorated with a flower from yours.

You still didn't understand, why would he marry you? Yes, you were his secretary for a year, before you started working under him you spared a few glances at each other in the fatui hall. Besides a few words of comfort and encouragement you offered him, there was nothing more that happened between you two. Yes, maybe you understood why back then he would fall in love with you. When younger and naive you always tried to bring a positive and happy atmosphere everywhere you went. You always helped, you never forgot anyone's birthday, you always carried patches with you and gave first aid help. But now you're a different person, you grew up. You became smarter and a hard worker. You haven't seen Scaramouche in years, and neither did he. So the attraction surely had to disappear, right?

"You promised you wouldn't leave," Scaramouche whispered, and suddenly your mouth ran dry.

Dottore fixed his clothes and microphone and opened his book, bending over he tapped the microphone a few times before finally speaking,"Welcome, loved ones. We are gathered here today to join Scaramouche and Y/n in holy matrimony." You remembered, how could you forget such a significant moment in your life. Your face became red your heart sinking, drowning in a cold sweat of guilt. Back then, when you started working as a harbinger, Scaramouche became a harbinger too. You remember everyone said that his heart was from stone, or from ice. Lost in past and his own anger.  You remembered wanting him to smile too as other harbingers did. You wanted to be friends with everyone so much, wanting everyone to warm up to you. You cleaned Dottores lab after experiments, trained with Childe, created handmade gifts to Sandrone, singing with Columbina. You tried to warm up to Scaramouche too, but he was always so dismissable and alone.

Yes, you remember, you were a people pleaser back then, helping everyone, making everyone feel welcome. Even when Scaramouche pissed you off you still bit your lip and were nice.

You remember one day, the night was cold and dark and you climbed onto the roof of fatui headquarters, stargazing. When Scaramouche found you he scolded you, telling you how he will tell Tsatsira, but knowing that Tsasira probably liked you more than him he gave up letting himself enjoy the peaceful moment. He climbed up, sitting next to you. You remember how he became sleepy and for the first time he let himself be vulnerable, he laid his head on your lap as you brushed through his hair, ranting and talking about meaningless things. And then listening carefully when he whispered his worries or ranted about his hopes for the future. You remembered the shock you felt when you found out he was a doll, suddenly scared to touch him, scared that your touch would break his beautiful face.

You remembered how you did a pinkie promise, promising you would be always here for him, always by his side.

But being with him was from time to time exhausting, even more, when you became his secretary, he can't blame you for leaving. For choosing a better future for yourself.

Perhaps you should have done better then. Be more honest, and more open. You didn't knew what consequences would your actions make. You should have said goodbye, or left a note. Not cutting all the connected strings, not cutting his heartstrings, leaving him alone, like everyone always did.

"No need to worry about the past! We have united again, thanks to your friends," he looked at you, his smile widening, his eyes dull and insipid, no longer violet, now they were purple-greyish with a hint of insanity. Shivers run down your spine, this Scaramouche was so much different than the one from your past. Like you were getting married to a brand new person.

Back then Scaramouche was cruel, he degraded people, he was possessive and dint understands human emotions, and he was angry and hot-headed, in contrast however he also allowed you to see his weak side, his kind and sympathetic side, his boring and calm side. You were the first person in years that showed him kindness and warmed up his ice heart. He was humanoid, he had both bad and good traits, and he showed true emotions even if he couldn't understand them.

Looking at him now. He no longer felt like a human. He was weirdly calm and relaxed, his face a sinister grin. The Scramouch next to you was a doll, a lifeless doll with no other emotion besides his sick love for you, no other thought than you. Unable to love, he was dead inside but alive outside.

It was like someone craved a heart out of his chest and stepped on it, and the one who did it was you. Just like when you became important to him and made him trust you, just to disappear without a trace.

Dottore kept talking, and reciting the text from the book, his clones sat in the front, eating as much food as they could, looking like hamsters. They were clapping their hands and loudly cheering, low-key making Dottore embarrassed.

"Just kiss already goddamn," the younger clone yelled, his mouth filled with cupcakes, the icing smeared all over his mouth. "No shut up Dottore you don't understand it, it feels more romantic this way," the older clone lightly slapped the back of the younger Dottores head.

"No may the pair exchange their vows," Dottore spoke, he shot a glaring look at his clones.

He looked back at you two, his mood brightening when he noticed your uneasy expression, sadist. ""Do you Scaramouche, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife, to live together in matrimony, to love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, to have and to hold, from this day forward, as long as you both shall live?," he spoke his gaze turning to Scaramouche who was still smiling.

He took your hand pressing it his heart nearly jumped from his chest at his excitement," I do."

"Do you Y/n-" Dottores voice was a blur, for a moment you couldn't hear anything, you felt your cheeks flush, your heart heaving, your blood pressure going up. You felt like you were about to vomit. Your hands shook as you thought about the past, how you left everyone, about the present, how you were about to get married, and the future, your life with Scaramouche.

Suddenly Scaramouche pinched your cheek getting you out of your thoughts, "I know you do, say it, don't be shy, everyone knows you already belong to me," Scaramouche whispered.

"Shut up," you whispered. You looked at your shoes in shame, "I do," your lip shook, you felt so humiliated.

"Amazing now might you kiss the bride," Dottore closed the book with a loud bang smiling. You backed away while Scaramouche took a step toward you. "I will be gentle I promise."

His hands cupped your cheeks, you nodded, "let it be over then."

Your lips connected, and he brushed his fingertips over your hair and pulled away. You blink a few times, while Scaramouche kissed your forehead, "I will make sure that you will never leave me again, you're all I need, you're my oxygen," he brushed a few hair strands from your face, his forehead on yours his pupils dilated and small, his crazed smile on his features. He was obsessed, you could feel it by how tightly he held you in his arms, scared you would disappear otherwise.

Dottore proudly walked towards his clones who were fangirling and jumping around him like hyped-up children.

The rest of the day felt like a blur, you cut the wedding cake together. A few of Scara's friends had a speech then Nigguang had a speech, her voice was slightly shaking, she tied to look at the crowd in front of her but upon meeting your angered gaze she always looked away, looking at the paper she held in her hands instead.  She babbled about how a monster was supposed to attack Liyue a sea monster until you saved them by your sacrifice, how you married the love of your life and in exchange, Scaramouche sent his fatui agents to kill the monster before it could attack.

Then you stood by Scaras side, his hand resting around your waist, his suffocating presence making you nervous. Is this how your life truly looks like now? There is truly no escape is it..

(the final chapter/epilogue will be posted this month,please look forward it)

TAGS: @aluraveil @alisstaa​ @cherlynono - sorry for such a boring chapter guys, next one will be beter, and final.

[borathae]

it’s the fact you have this platform with lots of followers and don’t use it to advocate for the right things

If you are the lil bitch fucker that keeps spamming me with "israel vs palestine" ANON messages, get off the fucking internet and get a fucking life.

Anyone with a fucking brain between their skull should know what I think about this very serious fucking topic and the fact that you make it into a little internet trend by going "hihi israel or palestine? pick one hihi" says way more about your fucking character than mine. You're fucking pathetic for sending in mutlitple asks like that just because you think it's cool to "jump onto the trend". Just because it's currently "trendy" on social media to pick sides, doesn't mean it's fucking okay to make it a thing. IT IS NOT! As if war and genocide is ever something you should make into a "lil social media trend", it's fucking disgusting how y'all are so chronically online these days that you don't even use your rotten brains for just one second to think "hey maybe I shouldn' t actually make it into a trend and go around saying hihi which side to pick to any stranger on the internet". Seriously fucking get a fucking grip on reality you bitch ass. There's actual people losing their homes and lives in Palestine right now, you assface, they're not just props in your newest "internet trend poll".

I don't "advocate" about the "right things" on this fucking blog because it's literally not that kind of blog. It's a blog where you can come to escape reality. You can fangirl/boy/enby, you can read and look at fanart, talk about bangtan and their music and you can FUCKING ESCAPE REALITY. It has never been a political/worldnews kind of blog because there are a lot better blogs out there for that. Blogs run by people who want to make it possible that people keep up to date with everything happening in the world, people who have politics as their passion and who will have a way broader vocabulary on the topic than I ever will.

Having followers no matter how many doesn't mean you automatically have to speak up about everything happening in the world just so lil bitch strangers like you can sleep better at night. I will not goddamn fucking perform my activism as if I'm a lil circus clown just to get off lil bitches like you. I'll donate as much as can, I'll try to keep up with the news as best as possible and I'll send prayers to everyone suffering and I'll do it not because I want to look better on the internet but because I actually fucking care about the people. And yes something like this is possible. You can actually care about world topics and partake in helping the innocent people in need without boasting about it on the internet. Yeah what a fucking wild take, but's it's actually fucking possible.

And now for the last fucking time so that even rotten brained bitches like you understand it, I generally don't tend to speak up about political or worldnews matters on here because this blog is a possibility for anyone who wants to escape the burdening realities for a little while.

If you would have come here actually wanting to seriously talk about this topic or asked me to give you guys options on how to help the people of Palestine, I would have fucking loved to do so. But instead you come here on anon like a lil coward bitch and try to make it into a "hihi funny internet trend hihi pick sides hihi funny". You're fucking disgusting and there is a reason why I've ignored you until now.

Now for anyone who actually wants to help and do something that will actually help the Palestines, I'll give you a list of organisations you can donate to. Make sure to see if you can donate from your country, I picked out the European sites of the organisations.

MAP

Islamic Relief

Save the Children

UN -> it will contain a list of more donation options

I am sure that there so many more organisations you can donate to, but I picked out the ones which I personally think trustworthy and to which I've also donated without any problems (please educate me if one of them is a scam and I haven't heard about it yet). Also feel free to leave more links in the comments, so there will be an array of possibilities for anyone who wants to help.

[altrodent]

stoney from encino man fanfic when? please? begging atp ‼️‼️ /nf /lh

Honey Bun

Pairing: Stoney x Reader

Genre/Warnings: Fluff, Stoney just being (sweetly) honest, teasing

Summary: After finding Link, and making him well known with the ‘modern’ trends, Stoney throws a party. And you, being his guest of honor, get some alone time with him.

A hand slides a note on your desk, as your boring science teacher drones on about evolution. You look up and see Stoney smiling at you, signaling for you to open the note. It reads “Dearest friend-a-rino, I cordially invite you to the sweetest ass party with the one and only Frosty Link! Please say yes, it’s gunna be boring w/o you. Loviest of Loves, Stoney <3” you giggle as you read the note, a little too loudly “Is there something you’d like to share with the class?” Stoney wraps you in his arms dramatically, gasping “Don’t ask questions like that, you know I don’t share!” He smiles with that stupidly cute face of his, the teacher sighs “…Just- just pay attention please. I don’t need you bringing their grade down Stoney…” he slowly turns back to the board as Stoney sits down, looking at me for an answer on his invitation. He whispers “Sooo? You gonna go or are you gonna make me all sad?” He pouts, you smile back at him “Course I’ll go” He puts his hands on his face gasping in ‘surprise’. “Stoney!” The teacher yells “Sorry, mister…” he giggles. You don’t really notice it, but he still looks at you… in a very loving way.

Stoney’s yard is filled to the brim with streamers, bright lights and a very strong fragrance of booze. You make your way through the heated crowds before a pair of arms hug and lift you up in the air. You jump before they put you down, turning you around to reveal- “I’m so glad you made it! I was so worried you weren’t gonna show” -Stoney. “I wouldn’t miss one of your parties, Stoney!” He smiles giddily, “come with me!” He doesn’t ask, as he takes your hand and leads you to the emptier back yard. “Sorry, I didn’t like them looking at you in there.” You tilt your head in confusion “what?” He rubs his arm “Sorry I just- I just don’t like it when people look at you the way I do.” You smile, still slightly confused “Well, how are they looking at me?” He dances around you, “Wow, they look so attractive, mhm, mhm, I love them, they look so fineee.” He eventually makes his way back to face you again. “That’s how.” He laughs stomping in place “Oh? Really? And you say they look at me the way you do?” He thinks “well, not exactly, because I know they’re not worthy for you… I might be though” he bites his lip before grabbing your hands and making you dance with him. You laugh as he dances with you, he sighs “I just don’t get why you gotta look so attractive all the time, it’s annoying.” He pouts as he twirls you around, his comment brings a slight blush to your face “…you think I’m attractive?” He stops in his tracks “Uh, have you seen yourself? You are just absolutely stunning… god, and see that’s just it. I feel like the hottest people just don’t know they’re hot…” he brushes your hair out of your face, cupping your cheeks after. “…Stoney, you really mean it?”

He nods “Yeah, and while I’m being honest, I’ve super had a little thing for you, but I really couldn’t squeeze it into a conversation before… until now~!” He giggles, as he holds you close to him “Oh, Stoney, that’s super sweet.” He pulls back enough to look at you “Says you, Sugar! You’re sweeter than a honey bun… now I’m hungry.” You giggle as he looks into your eyes “you look tasty though!” He beings to pepper soft kisses onto your face, making you laugh even more, causing him to smile even more “mwah! Just look at you, you tasty thing!” He presses one more kiss on your forehead before leaning into you again “Stoney, you’re just full of surprises, aren’t you?” He chuckles softly “always, besides, if I didn’t I wouldn’t get to see that beautiful smile of yours now would I?” He leans back holding his face close to yours “I promise… just- please give me a chance… and I’ll make you this happy forever, until we’re both old and gross and yelling at people to get off our lawn” Stoney smiles, caressing your cheek “Please…” your eyes almost seemingly swell with the happiest of tears as his words flow. You nod, smiling “Stoney, how could I ever pass up the chance to be with the best guy I’ve ever met…?” He smiles brightly, his lips finally meeting yours. You can feel him smile just as brightly as his hands move from your face and down to your hips. The kiss is full of long awaited love, that he just professes to you through your connected lips. And as all other good things, the kiss ends, as he rests his forehead against yours. “You have officially made me the happiest man in the universe, Sugar… and I won’t let you down.” He smiles, and from then on all you can feel for him is a warm and loving passion for the man you’ve come to known as Stoney.

~

(A/N): I hope you enjoyed! I’m trying to ram through this writers block right now, thank you for the request! 🩷

[bluiex]

Alright I’ve noticed a trend developing so I’m just gonna drop in to remind everyone:

In double life, scar refuses to acknowledge that Grian is his soulmate long before Grian cheats with BigB

Even after Grian literally smacked him on the head with it, he continued to refer to the jellies as his only true soulmates. Grian was just his teammate, his ally.

Is it narratively fucked that Grian cheated? Yes!

But also, Scar wouldnt acknowledge their relationship properly!

The only times scar references Grian as his soulmate is when he’s A- telling others, always with an air of “yeah, I’m stuck with that guy 🙄” (which is funny bc that’s v similar to how Grian says it too) or B- he’s actively hurting the two of them, like when he was jumping in powdered snow.

Like!! The tragedy of these two isn’t oh fuck after the cactus ring, scar got left alone (LL) and then cheated on (DL). The tragedy of these two is oh fuck after the cactus ring, they both can’t stand to be too far (LL) or too close (DL) from each other!! Their toxicity is as mutually codependent as their love!!

— abridged anon

Yeah! Like their relationship in DL was just a whole bunch of toxic

but we have to remember at the end of the day: it's a silly little game hosted by ccGrian and everything we come up with is head canons and in good fun :) silly little blorbos I personally like to push angst onto <3

also i'd like to add: We're all allowed to narrate how we want them to be, in our own ways. it's just in good fun, which is why i try to carefully tag things so like if you dont wanna see one narrative/headcanon you can block it :D

[playedbetter]

"You can stop looking," Zach announces as he flops backwards onto his bed, carelessly tossing his phone aside. There's an edge of deep frustration in his voice, this is not the first time his advice is going unheeded when the results are obviously cataclysmic, and he doubts it'll be the last time.

Nick looks up from his focused magic circle he has set up on the floor. "What? Did he tell you where he is? Or that this is a false alarm?" Nick honestly isn't sure why he jumped in to help, he supposes this will probably be a good mark on his record, not that those would ever cover up the bad ones.

"Nope!" Zach exclaims in an exasperated tone, throwing both his arms up for empathies. "He's going straight into the gapping maw of destruction whether it kills him or not!"

Nick just blinks bewildered for a moment. "Knowingly?"

Zach sits up just enough for it to be visible to Nick that he's nodding repeatedly and tightly.

"Well that's stupid," Nick says without thinking. Crossing his arms.

Zach lets out a groan and flops right back down. "I don't think he's being stupid, I'm sure he's well aware of what he's doing. He just doesn't think it matters, that he matters, and that it's not going to hurt everybody like fuck when something awful happens to him. That the best thing for the universe he can do is be a martyr, so he might as well throw himself in the line of any danger. I don't know why, but it's a recurring trend with my friends,"

Nick lights himself a cigarette, using magic to keep it from spreading ashes all over the place or stink it up. He hums for a moment, this really isn't his problem and yet it is a relatable one. "I've known my share of people like that in my time and you want to know my advice?"

"Not really," Zach mumbles. "Would take a cig though,"

"In exchange for a cigarette you're going to have to bare with an old man yapping your ear off, that's how it works," Nick pulls out a smoke and hands to Zach who sits up and lights his own, Nick can see the little move of the kids hands that's making his burn clean. Smart trick.

"Fine, go ahead," Zach relents.

"So when I've dealt with self made martyrs I've had to learn to not try to take responsibility for them, not try to control them, I would have gone crazy a lot sooner if I had tried to control them. I couldn't stop them from putting themselves in danger, and I couldn't make them care enough about themself to stop, and people like that never seem to be able to comprehend the hole they'd leave behind if they did die, trying to convince them is just going to frustrate. I had to look at myself at the mirror and decide if I could actually put up with the grief he would bring, and at the time for me the answer was yes. And frankly, that was probably a stupid choice-"

Zach crosses his arms and gives Nick a skeptical look. "I'm starting to think this isn't about me,"

"Right right, my bad. Anyways my point was, you have to choose whether or not you can deal with the grief they'll bring. If you can, set up what you can to patch them up metaphorically or literally, and make the best of the time you get with them. If you can't, find a way to cut them out and don't look back, it'll never be pretty if you look back,"

"You make it sound so simple, but I can't just cut people off like that. I'd leave a little bit of myself behind with them. I can't just make myself not care about people I've loved, even if it would be better for me not to care," Zach sighs and takes a drag. "I don't know how much heartbreak I can actually handle though, well, how much more. Not to sound like an arrogant twenty something but I think I've had my fair share already. And every time it's so bad, and it's always worse than the last time,"

"You have your cousins heart, and honestly, I don't know how she's managed to survive this long without numbing herself to everything. Have you ever considered alcohol or heavy drugs?" Nick asks in an almost joking tone.

Zach does actually snicker at that. "Both, and that's probably why I haven't flown off the handle yet, but at the rate I'd need them to be fully numb I'd kill myself,"

"Fair enough, I can't say I'd endorse killing yourself even though technically that'd solve your current problems," Nick shrugs.

"I'm not going to, if I ever was going to I would have already,"

They share silence for a minute, it's not actually all that tense, if anything it's calm.

"So what do I do?" Zach finally asks. "I've got a bleeding heart and I can't bring myself to cut any of them off. Either way, I'm fucked,"

Nick looks Zach over, he remembers what he was doing when he was the kids age. Everything that had gone wrong. Everything that made the man that he is now. "Try to hang on for as long as you can, because when you go off the rails, it's gonna be a doozy."

[spaceorphan18]

Glee Musical Retrospective: Jump (Mattress)

Sung by: New Directions Original Artist(s): Van Halen

This has got to be one of my favorite early series numbers. It's just a lot of fun, and it never fails to make me smile. Artie holding onto that sign that says jump cracks me up.

Story Analysis

So. I feel like for a song that's relatively meant to be at face value, there are a couple of layers that can be pulled out of it. The first being the obvious. Classic rock screams local tv ad, and they're literally jumping around on mattresses. The music and corny direction fits what they're literally supposed to be doing -- shooting a low budget commercial.

And honestly, as somewhat of an aside, I kind of love everything about it. From the set up, to the ridiculous choreography, the kids look like they're having a blast, and it kind of puts you in a good, happy head space (which is why what comes next feels so jarring -- but more on that in a second.)

Pulling back a layer - this song is about taking a chance on life and living it. Apparently, Van Halen - in coming up with the song - was thinking about (of all things) suicide jumpers, and how there's always one person who is telling the jumper to jump. So, Van Halen wanted to write a song that is about jumping into life instead.

And as odd as that is for inspiration for a song -- can we take a second and layer that onto these kids? Most of whom up to this point have had kind of a sucky life and/or childhood and now they're working as a team, doing something for fun, and really getting into it.

You've got to roll with the punches To get to what's real

There aren't really a whole lot of lyrics to work with -- and most of them are the repetitive 'jump' mantra -- meant to invoke jumping into life in a positive way. But the undercurrent is that the person singing is having a hard time with life -- and is choosing to keep on going. Which I think works well for what these kids are going through. It makes for a nice group number -- because it's a theme that all of the kids are going through, and how they're bonding because they're going through it together.

Jumping through life together -- get it? Yes, Glee is so subtle.

Interestingly, though, I'd like to add that the next scene after this number is the scene where Will finds out about Terri's fake baby. It's so jarring in tone (was there a commercial break here originally? I don't know). But I think it's fascinating for two reasons -- the first being that it's so unexpected after such a joyous, celebratory number. The kids are finally coming together as a team as and having fun together as Will's story is now finally falling apart.

But also - more than likely unintentionally, I think it's a moment for Will and Terri to finally make that proverbial jump -- to acknowledge, finally, that they need to start the rest of their lives and to do so means not doing it together.

Technical Analysis

Vocally -- the biggest thing I want to say is that this song is known as synth-rock -- intentionally put through synth filters making it have that mechanical sound. Just needed to point out the continued irony of Glee trying to go for a real set up and yet, aurally, having the music not match up to what it would sound like live. Like I've said, maybe, a hundred times now - I prefer when Glee leans into a little magical realism and stops trying so hard to sell the audience on logic.

That said - I think it sounds nice (even if the back up vocals are probably doubled or tripled again). It's a fun and catchy song, and Glee makes it sound good.

I would also like to point out that this continues an ongoing trend in the early series of Finn and Rachel starting a song off, and then Artie and Mercedes taking the second half of the song -- so Mercedes can wail on that high note. Glee is aware of what is working, and (for better or worse) they have a tendency to stick to the same thing once they know what does.

For the rest of the tech stuff, though, I have a list of some fun facts for you...

Apparently, Zach Woodlee (Glee's choreographer) let the kids do what they liked and kept the interesting parts.

Did you noticed the trained dancers (Harry and Heather) are the ones doing the most jumping on the mattresses?

Speaking of which - the beds were actually trampolines.

(Also - recently, Heather said this was one of her least favorite numbers -- I don't blame her, as she's moving the entire time, it was probably very physically demanding)

Cory, apparently, loved doing the scream at the beginning

Jenna, Mark, Dianna, and Chris all did the back up vocals for the song.

And... in what's going to end up being a theme - Chris got hurt, Dianna managed to kick him in the groin, as well as hurting his neck during rehearsal.

Glee Live

Okay, so I had to include this here -- before the song on tour Kurt and Brittany had a little bit. It's kind of hilarious.

This is super cute. I don't really have anything to add to it other than - omg, I can't believe the number of stunts Glee Live did on stage.

vs. The Studio Version: Hey, it's the full version! Including full intro, second verse, and guitar solo. It also sounds clean and solid. I also think they mix voices a little -- I feel like I hear a mixing of Lea and Amber as well as Cory and Artie. I wonder if they layered on the different tracks instead of just one person at time for the tv version. Huh.

vs. The Original Version: Ah, Glam Rock at its finest. Is it weird that the original feels even more authentically synth? Is that a thing that's possible? Lol. Also - notice how Glee reproduces the high guitar parts with Mercedes? Fantastic. Also - while the arrangement is more or less the same -- they sing it at a faster tempo (another running theme with Glee). Glee always manages to give these songs a more maniac feel -- which is partly because its a tv show needing to keep things short, but also because Glee is just a manic show most of the time. It makes the original seem much more laid back, lol.

[magicalmystery-muses]

New Marvel/Spider-Verse OC

Mirror Spider

(SPIDER IMAGERY TW INCLUDING IN HER MOODBOARD)

Name: Christine Gossamer

Alias: Mirror Spider

Faceclaim/Voiceclaim: Christy Altomare

Age: 29

Sexuality: Bisexual

Backstory: Christine Gossamer had been Mirror Spider for a little under two years before her universe fell to pieces thanks to a broken canon. Her survival was pure luck; a portal had appeared out of seemingly nowhere, she jumped through, and before she knew it, there was something that appeared to be a high-tech wristwatch slapped onto her before her molecules were torn to shreds. Maybe it was pity, maybe it was scientific curiosity, maybe it was the timing of when this all happened, or hell, maybe it was something else entirely. But Miguel O'Hara recruited her for his newly formed Spider Society.

Tag: your face in the mirror (christine gossamer)

Other Details:

Oh look yet another OC being shipped with Miguel O'Hara

The reason she went with the alias "Mirror Spider" was because she was bitten, she got curious and tried to figure out what spider bit her, and it most looked like the real life mirror spider species.

There's reflective surfaces on her suit that blind enemies

When first developing her I had this idea that she had an additional ability where her eyes reflected someone's worst fear when they made eye contact, but I'm not sure if I'm keeping that or not

I named the Earth she's from Earth-24601. Yes this is a Les Miserables reference. Yes her name is a Phantom of the Opera reference. This combined with her face/voiceclaim being the literal OBC Anastasia really saw that the autism won in her creation

"The world is cruel so I won't be" type of person

I'm actually planning on doing a fic of her at some point! I really wanna delve into the irony of her and Miguel's dynamic and how she's like a broken reflection of why Miguel's views are flawed and yada yada yada, not gonna get into details rn bc spoilers but I'm taking this and running with it fr

Her picture in the middle was created using a Spiderverse filter back when it was a big tiktok trend

She was an Oscorp scientist in her home universe. "I'm smart but I'm stupid" af

Her biggest guilty pleasure? Cheesy supernatural romance novels. This actually didn't play a role in her developing feelings for Miguel, it was more like she already started feeling things for him and later was like "holy shit he has fangs?? Bonus??" She knows he's not actually a vampire but that changes nothing

[technodromes]

I had thoughts TM yesterday when I came home from the cinema, but I was too tired to write them down. Now I'm awake and these thoughts are still around, so here we go. It pretty much started off with 'why I don't really like the 2003 TMNT' but turned into a whole 'TMNT and Me' thing, so I put it under a read more. Because it's long.

So, as you know by now probably, I was born 1986. When I got older and started to watch cartoons on Saturday morning, I regularly watched the 1987 iteration of the 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles'. And boy I loved them. I'd get mad every time we went to visit my grandma on the weekend and I couldn't watch my favorite show. I didn't know at that time that there was a comic to it that was much darker actually.

Several years later, I got into Anime & Manga. Well, mostly Manga actually. The amount of available Manga in my country started growing around 2000. I also remember that I didn't watch that much tv because I just didn't really vibe with 2000s cartoons anymore. I think I saw glimpses of the 2003 Turtles when I zapped through channels and found them way too gritty. I couldn't really get behind why they made the Turtles that buff and rude and everything you know? People are complaining about Netflix turning children's shows all dark and gritty and how they hate this new trend, but that 'trend' started already before Netflix if you ask me. Mind you, I was no stranger to dark and serious cartoons as a kid though. We had a fair share of them. The Black Cauldron, for example. All Dogs Go to Heaven included serious topics too. And my dad let me watch Felidae when he thought 'Oh, there's a cartoon with cats for Sabine to watch', only for the cartoon to reveal that it is absolutely NOT made for kids lmao. I also watched 'Watership Down'. I mean, if you're familiar with these titles, you'll know.

But to get back to seeing the 2003 Turtles the first time, I just couldn't get behind that 'edgy action hero' vibe. So I dismissed the series and didn't follow it further. I continued reading Manga or watching Anime where available. I recall getting into series already BEFORE they got released here, Fullmetal Alchemist being a good example. YEARS later people jumped onto that train and I was already hyper-focused on other series. I spent time working on my own websites and improving my English skills over time as well. I was all over the place on the internet and met people on a website called Animexx, where I got to rp. Just a lot of stuff, I ain't going to unpack all that.

To be quite honest, I completely missed the 2012 Turtles back then. I rarely watched TV anymore around that time, I was busy with other stuff like finding my first job and all that. I finished my apprenticeship late, it was around 2011 when I did. So I had a lot of other things on my mind. I also missed Rise! pretty much on 2018. I had to move back to my parents around 2017 after I had my own apartment 2014-2017, and I was once again searching for a new job there. I recall it was a mess. I believe it was 2018 when I started working at that place I was for 5 years, the longest I worked somewhere. So, I believe it was around 2021 when I discovered Rise. And yes, I've grown much more open-minded to my 'favorite series' having a different spin to them since. I actually enjoyed Rise a lot. And it has also a special place in my heart because it did bring me back to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, which I was so obsessed with as a kid. Also, I've grown very much tired with Manga & Anime at that point because there's such a FLOOD now. Around 2000, a new Manga release was something special. Now it's impossible to keep up anymore.

Not too long ago, I thought about checking the 2003 iteration of TMNT out again and stumbled over Turtles Forever. And listen, I get the point they tried to make there. The 2003 Turtles being closer to their origins, being serious and edgy and all that, whereas the 1987 Turtles have been made kids-friendly and goofy. I DO get that. But they had the '87 Turtles pretty much incompetent and obnoxious from the beginning to the finish and as someone loving the '87 boys, I took offense in that. It just didn't feel right to me how they portrayed them the way they did there. In the first and last seasons of the old TMNT series, there had been more serious tunes too. I mean come on, they aren't THAT incompetent.

*takes a DEEP breath* It can be done better, and the writers of the 2012 series proved that. They also picked up on 'the '87 Turtles were made kids-friendly and wouldn't do well in a more serious series' fact. They were also portrayed as being obnoxious in the beginning. But instead of having the 2012 Turtles act as demeaning babysitters, they trained their '87 counterparts and worked together with them. The way how the crossover ended was just a lot more wholesome to me. Plus, they included Bebop & Rocksteady and gave the boys their redemption arc there! I loved that a lot.

I'm definitely biased tho and I'm sure I will watch the '03 Turtles eventually, just like I binge-watched the 2012 ones. I mean credit where credit is due, they originally came up with Bishop and I love that guy there just as much as I love 2012's version of him (even though they are absolute polar opposites). I watched a 2003 Bishop compilation on youtube and that guy is something else. Also, I know that some of my mutuals here prefer the 2003 TMNT over the others, and let me tell you here that's perfectly fine! I know 2003 has been your childhood and I respect that. I'd love to hear about your favorite parts of it! In the end, we all love TMNT and I love talking to people about it, it doesn't matter which version. Also, a bottom line I want to share here is something that bothers me about long-time fandoms that have different iterations. I mean, I made it a point that I'm not awfully fond of the 2003 iteration all in all, but I would never go on youtube and reply to someone excitedly commenting on a 2003 video about how I think it sucks. Don't fucking do that, people. You can voice your opinion separately in your own comment and be on your way again. Don't bash and attack people for liking something you don't. It's really not that hard. I've seen posts around here on tumblr as well with questionable replies to them. Just... let others enjoy their favorite version of their series.