karistiltskin - Tumblr blog

[karistiltskin]

i just remembered the time over a year ago when i reread all the maze runner books so i could write a maze runner marauders au but then just never got to it and ended up going down a newtmas hole💀

[karistiltskin]

AND I WAS RIGHT.

everybody say thank you mskingbeannnnn

THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT? TAYLOR?

(marauders coded to the very T, sorry someone had to say it and it had to be me)

[karistiltskin]

witnessed can’t catch me now live a few hours ago and i swear to you i FELT evan rosier’s spirit.

[karistiltskin]

does anyone else hc dorcas to just appear like a complete loner?

it’s not that there’s anything wrong with her but:

- she has friends but doesn’t have a friend group

- she comes off as closed off at first but it’s only because she’s introverted

- she won’t talk to anyone unless they talk to her first

- people like to talk to her in class but they won’t hang out outside of it

- she’s in a bunch of clubs but the friendships don’t expand from their shared interests

- she keeps to herself and no one thinks much about it

- a lot of people think she’s cool but won’t approach her

- nobody really hates her, in fact, she gets a lot of compliments on her style and everyone thinks she’s absolutely beautiful

it’s just… nothing sticks.

and the whole time dorcas is wishing that someone talks to her and that they grow a genuine friendship that will last but she’ll never make the first move either. so overtime she gets used to her own company and accepts the fact that she’ll spend her teenage years alone.

[karistiltskin]

nessa barrett’s music is extremely regulus black coded.

no i will not explain, go listen.

[karistiltskin]

can someone write a jegulus notebook au please?

i’m desperate.

[karistiltskin]

i once saw a tiktok comment talking about jegulus in the room of requirement that said "their love will never leave that room, them neither" and i just want you guys to sit with that for a while.

[karistiltskin]

sometimes i think about how my life can’t get any fucking worse but then i think about how jegulus only got more and more tragic over the years🤣

[karistiltskin]

jily’s seventh year pining era will never not get me.

them looking at each other during meals and lily thinking james doesn’t like her anymore while james is just aching because she’s still so beautiful>>>

them going to sleep after a gryffindor common room party only to realize they spent the entire night together talking and laughing>>>

james trying his hardest to just be lily’s friend and respect her wishes while lily has been sending signals at him for weeks>>>

lily drooling over james after quidditch practice>>>

james being in awe of lily when she gets a question right during class after trying to compete with her a moment before>>>

them all of a sudden having inside jokes and being the first ones to look at each other when something funny happens>>>

my heart is always so warm thinking about them.

(btw remus and marlene were the most excited out of everyone)

[karistiltskin]

i wanna talk about how james always just… grabs regulus’ face and kisses him.

when he has nothing to say in response to something regulus said (most likely unhinged): grabs his face and kisses him

when he thinks regulus is being adorable: grabs his face and kisses him

when regulus is fuming and going on a rant (looking absolutely beautiful): grabs his face and kisses him

in response regulus always does one of two things.

1) melts into the kiss because it’s james and james is a very passionate kisser

or

2) pushes him away and goes “james!” looking all flushed and huffing before going back to kiss his boyfriend again

[karistiltskin]

Can't wait for everyone to pick apart and ruin every rep and lover lyric and put negative connotations into them instead of understanding that things can change over time

[karistiltskin]

mary adored lily’s hair. she would play with it all the time until it became a habit to play with her hair when she was bored. right up to the point where she even thought about dying her hair the same colour.

[karistiltskin]

james “hey, regulus! wait up! *but then forgetting everything he wants to say as soon as regulus looks at him*” potter

[karistiltskin]

remus and sirius fell in love with each other's flaws first. sorry, i don't make the rules.

[karistiltskin]

i think the thing that makes me feel connected to dorlene is that they both want more. they're too big for their own skin and they're too big for just one lifetime. i think they both feel trapped in their lives as well as thinking they're destined for so much more and that the world has so much untapped potential to dig out. after setting themselves free they both would do just that. dig. dig and dig and dig until they realize the soil 6 feet below looks the same as the soil on the surface. it's an idealized feeling that they try to chase and they'll never live to feel it because it just doesn't exist. but over time after a lot of self-reflection, they'll come to terms with it and realize what they feel for each other is the same type of all-consuming feeling they've been looking for. they didn't know that because they just haven't felt anything less.

[karistiltskin]

what if i said "but I would die for you in secret" but imagine merlin and arthur.

peace lyric analysis as merthur:

"Our coming-of-age has come and gone

Suddenly the summer, it's clear

I never had the courage of my convictions

As long as danger is near

And it's just around the corner, darling

'Cause it lives in me

No, I could never give you peace"

OUR COMING-OF-AGE?? okay, listen. as we know, arthur's coming-of-age moment is linked to his coronation. He literally has an episode called "The Coming of Arthur" parts one and two (S03 E12-E13). it's arthur becoming king and merlin starting to finally feel like he's getting somewhere with their destiny because of arthur's crowning. this is our setting. we're now in the after.

"I never had the courage of my convictions as long as danger is near" SHUT UPPPP SHUT UPPPP like actually oh my god. as long as danger is near is so so sick and speaks so loud. merlin absolutely does have the courage of his convictions and just to clarify, collins dictionary [colin morgan ;) ] states it as the confidence to do what you believe is right, even though other people may not agree or approve. BUT when arthur is in danger he does not do the "right" thing. he listens to the giant lizard instead or gaius (still love him) and does anything, anything, to make sure arthur doesn't get harmed no matter what.

rip morgana and getting poisoned.

rip mordred's entire existence.

although arthur attracts danger, merlin attracts just as much. and merlin is magic. (ugh, I'm getting sad and the only reason i won't cry is cause i'm in the middle of a lecture. a nighttime lecture). merlin can never give arthur peace because he is everything arthur was conditioned to hate. arthur can never give merlin peace because he's a king with expectations from Camelot and neighboring kingdoms. aka they can never be peacefully together without the threat of danger from them both and towards their relationship.

"But I'm a fire, and I'll keep your brittle heart warm

If your cascade ocean wave blues comes

All these people think love's for show

But I would die for you in secret

The devil's in the details, but you got a friend in me

Would it be enough if I could never give you peace?"

merlin lights arthur fires. that's it. that's the tweet.

merlin is also arthur's closest friend and confidant. he definitely gets arthur to see other perspectives on a situation and makes sure he remains compassionate and fair. for example, that look arthur gave merlin in S05 E11 during kara's trial?? my god. or the episode where arthur killed that one king's son under the influence of his uncle, the sleaze.

THEY WOULD DIE FOR EACH OTHER IN SECRET. NO ARGUMENTS. they've proved episode after episode again that they would no questions asked. people who don't know them just go "he's just a servant" or "you would choose him over your kind?" (ouch) not knowing the depth of their relationship. but yes. yes they would. and they would not have a single regret. they would deny the hell out of it but the proof is in their actions.

but you got a friend in me yes ma'am they do.

and it would be enough. it would. do they need a reminder that they were both born in mind of each other? that it was written since the beginning of time? that both of them have their own personal demons that instead of running away they'd take care of each other instead? that they're the most important person for each other and nothing can split them apart because they've grown to trust each other so much that their souls have intertwined? two sides of the same coin? other half of my soul, as the poets say???

"Your integrity makes me seem small

You paint dreamscapes on the wall

I talk shit with my friends

It's like I'm wasting your honor"

from arthur's pov he knows merlin is better than him. the way he interacts with people, his morals and values, his humbleness, just everything really. he pretends to be mad and upset about it but there's such deep admiration in it that he's actually self-aware.

dreamscape (google) definition: a landscape or scene with the strangeness or mystery characteristic of dreams

arthur finds merlin so strange!! so strange and mysterious.

the walls: i read this one fanfic on ao3 called "The Tragedy of Godhood" by Lilmia_Casand (read it!! it's so good. short, but beautiful) and the summary states:

"Merlin had gotten better at controlling his magic over the years, but it still spilled over, as if he were the source instead of someone calling upon it. It seeped into the castle walls, into the stone floors..."

This was the first thing I thought of (this quote stuck with me, it got bookmarked) and i couldn't have said it better. here's a play by play: arthur lives in a castle. the castle has walls. a lot of walls. he sees these walls everyday. the walls are familiar. the walls stay. the walls are forever. he can't imagine the castle without his walls.

walls = life/the future

magic is part of merlin's mystery because he's essentially hiding HIMSELF.

(does this make sense? no, prob not but bear with me)

there's an air about merlin where when you think about him, you realize you actually don't know much about him. he's a mystery. you know his jokes, you know where he's gonna be at whatever time of day (not the tavern, contrary to what arthur thinks), you know his favourite food. you don't know about his parents, you don't know why he saved arthur at his first feast, you don't know why he stays around.

arthur reflects on this and realizes it one day when merlin starts to become unavoidable in his mind. then he thinks, 'i really know nothing about this boy.' over time, merlin stays by his side, always, and arthur is so dependent on him that he starts worrying if he'll ever leave and if not him, camelot (he has abandonment issues 100%).

also see: S01 E10

hence, "you paint dreamscapes on the wall" is arthur saying, "you're the biggest mystery i've ever met and you make me wonder what every day will be like with you. will you be here tomorrow? and the day after that? until I'm married and have children who will favour you over me? will you be here to see them? to see me? i can't see it through the haze. i can't see you through the haze."

moving on—fuck that was so much longer than it needed to be—arthur and merlin talk shit about each other ALL THE TIME it's hilarious. and they know the one "bad" thing they talk about doesn't define their entire character because they hold each other in such high regard but... well...

(they definitely have regrets after)

"And you know that I'd swing with you for the fences

Sit with you in the trenches

Give you my wild, give you a child

Give you the silence that only comes when two people understand each other

Family that I chose, now that I see your brother as my brother

Is it enough?"

they both go all out for each other but with a focus on merlin, he goes ALL. OUT. it's war with him. nothing is half-assed. he fights, and fights, and never takes it less than seriously. but he also is there at arthurs lowest moments. when they're losing and when arthur is feeling too much or has too much on his shoulders. he's there. through it all.

merlin will give arthur anything he asks. he's already given him the purpose of his life and has hidden his magic until arthur's dying day because he thought that's what arthur needed and thought he would never accept him as he is so he gave it up.

but he's also given arthur the best thing he has. a friend. understanding. communication without words. souls recognizing souls, so much that the silence may be quiet but words are being exchanged through that same silence.

also, speechless eye conversations that range near the line of sexual tens—

then in the last line, merlin is saying: your people are my people. your burdens are my burdens.

"But there's robbers to the east, clowns to the west

I'd give you my sunshine, give you my best

But the rain is always gonna come if you're standing with me"

this goes both ways!! the only difference is that arthur's is visible and merlin's is hidden. explanation: arthur no doubt has enemies, it's not a secret. being a king and a target from the magic community, that man is almost getting killed everyday. it is not a peaceful life. he knows that. but nonetheless, he has shown merlin his best before—merlin is literally the reason he reaches the best person he can be, like the growth omg—so he knows he can give it but he knows there's a lot of baggage (external and internal) that comes with being with him.

as for merlin, his enemies are a secret. and they're dangerous. arthur faces some of those same enemies but from the product of what they've created, not them personally. no, merlin goes head-to-head with the people who curse/try to kill arthur. and he gives arthur a version of his best (he still has to keep many many secrets) but even if it's limited it's still genuine. although his secrets, his late nights, and his pure exhaustion are a part of him as well. and you can't have sunshine without rain.

okay ,WOW, i'm wrung out. it feels incomplete so i might add additional things later on but for now, enjoy.

once again, thank you if you read this, thank you bbc merlin, and thank you taylor swift.

(notice how i didn't use the word love once)

[karistiltskin]

i don’t care that the lakes is only now getting its recognition i just care that it’s about MERLIN and ARTHUR.

little teeny tiny analysis incoming:

“Is it romantic how all my elegies eulogize me

I’m not cut out for all these cynical clones

These hunters with cell phones”

First of all, this is set in Merlin’s POV. The first line talks about Merlin becoming a myth and how he’s praised as the most powerful wizard alive. He is a staple as the start of “magic” and “wizardry” after his legacy is passed on. The use of the term “romantic” seems sarcastic as if he’s saying “isn’t it romantic that after my kind was hunted down and killed for believing to be evil, now I’m the optimum of good? Shouldn’t i be over the moon from this appreciation?”

Moving on to the second and third verse, “cynical clones” and “hunters with cell phones” refers to modern time. These people have twisted Merlin’s story, didn’t get it right, missed out on details, and changed him. Because his history is not correct he feels uncomfortable but is also placed in a position where he cannot clarify or speak out on it because he’s supposed to be, well, dead. People are using his story for fame and no one is receiving the truth. It’s just been turned into a myth to be broken apart, analyzed, and criticized.

“Take me to the lakes where all the poets went to die

I don’t belong, and my beloved, neither do you

Those Windermere peaks look like a perfect place to cry

I’m setting off, but not without my muse”

(only doing the chorus once)

if the first line doesn’t speak for itself I don’t know what does. Merlin is a poet!! He is. A quick google search for the definition of poet reads: “a person possessing special powers of imagination or expression.” hello??? We all knew he was good with words whether it came from enchantments, comforting words to his friends, his followers, or when speaking about himself. “special powers”—he is magic. “imagination”—he creates, he is creation.

He is the original poet who went to the lakes, not necessarily to die, but the other half of his soul was taken from him there.

Now, Merlin of course believes Arthur was not meant to die. He doesn’t belong there. He belongs at Merlin’s side. The lakes = Avalon and Merlin did not ever want to go there in the situation that Arthur may die. The both of them weren’t meant to wait for their purpose to begin again at Avalon when “Camelot needed Arthur most.” They were supposed to stay together in the time of a human life span and their story was supposed to continue.

“Windermere peaks.” I’m not gonna dive too much into this so here’s one word: England

The last line is that Merlin could not have stayed at the lake forever. I mean he could’ve but, I don’t think he would. So he lives his life in the most physical sense he can. He does go to visit Avalon tho and his life, his soul, doesn’t restart until Arthur’s does. He carries Arthur with him everywhere at all times, and he doesn’t forget that as he leaves Avalon and he never forgets the reason why as he also goes BACK to Avalon. Also, Arthur being Merlin’s muse>>> I mean, the whole “my magic. i use it for you. it was supposed to be yours.” EVERYTHING Merlin did was for Arthur.

“What should be burrowed under my skin

In heart-stopping waves of hurt

I’ve come too far to watch some namedropping sleaze

Tell me what are my words worth”

The first two lines refer to his early life in Camelot. Moving there, making friends, growing in his magic, Arthur, trust, betrayal, his lessons. He thinks because so much time has passed (he’s immortal) he should at least be over it or it should stop hurting but it doesn’t. It stays with him. It’s a part of him and who he is.

Now for the next two lines. Although the past will linger in him, he does grow and become wiser over the years. He has so many experiences and has lived through so many lifetimes and is still finding the strength to continue. But he’s had to watch people get his life absolutely wrong, the narratives of his friends and enemies, his character, etc. I like to think Merlin dropped some real pieces of evidence of the truth in a manuscript or a symbol or anything but the ones who found it, abused it. Instead of appreciating art and life they looked for the income and how to profit off it.

“I want auroras and sad prose

I want to watch wisteria grow right over my bare feet

‘Cause I haven’t moved in years

And I want you right here”

Merlin finds memories in the hurt. He finds comfort in it. He wants to stay in the past because as much as it pains him, it was a time where he was the most happy.

Wisteria = a plant that can live for centuries (symbolism: resilience and longevity)

“help i’m still at the restaurant.” is Merlin. He has not moved on at all, that poor soul. He wants Arthur forever but also ALIVE and physically, mentally, emotionally with him.

“A red rose grew up out of ice frozen ground

With no one around to tweet it

While I bathe in cliffside pools

With my calamitous love and insurmountable grief”

Merlin has a shield around him. Actually, plural, shields. His pain, anger, and hurt made him become this shell. But the red rose, his love, it’s still there. Always there. His love for Arthur and his narrative is still ongoing and no one knows. It’s his to keep.

His “calamitous love” and insurmountable grief” although sounds horrid are both stemmed from the purest thing he has. His love. It’s so passionate because he feels and cares so much. So his love is used as a metaphor with cliffside pools and the water in it because it (his love) overflows and spills over (i think? do cliffside pools do that?)

OKAY I’M DONE. mostly cause im tired, it’s 3:26 am, and im fried. the keyboard has been smashed quite enough and this makes one lengthy tumblr post (i can write more). i don’t even know if most of it makes sense i just wanted to get it out there.

also don’t take this too literally of course there are a million interpretations to this song, i associate it far more than just an immortal warlock and a dead king, as well as my opinions. I just wanted to share a little bit of where my mind was going. just a little.

props to you if you read this, thank you, and thank you bbc merlin