sageiii

[sageiii]

You don't realize just how much time you spend on maladaptive daydreaming until you work on quitting and it's like okay. Uh. What the fuck do I do now?? There's basically an extra 5 hours added onto every day that I have no clue what to do with like I have NO hobbies what the fuck do i do with all this timee?????

[sageiii]

My red flag is that I can't help people if someone's watching me do it or even notices that I did it at all

And I'm not talking about like picking something up for someone or whatever, i mean like if I want to do some laundry to lessen the load for my mom, I can only do it while she's not home and the big reason why I'm considering not doing it is fuck, what if she acknowledges it?? What if she says thanks and I'm hit with that terrible sense of wrongness similar to watching someone color outside the lines?? That strange guilt where suddenly you feel like you did it for the praise despite knowing yourself, knowing that she may think I'm doing it for the praise and somehow manage to judge me for it??

Anyways this is why I can't have roommates I would NEVER get anything done

[sageiii]

Me, joking: what? Is this your first day on earth or something?

Alien, suddenly very sweaty: no what why would you say that

[sageiii]

So dc fanon is weird, blablablablabla, we all know this, but most of the fanon stuff at least makes some sense to me. Like Tim's weird coffee addiction? That stemmed from him drinking some energy drinks and off brand coke in canon. Jason's pit rage? The need to babygirlify him so they give him an easy out for his whole murder thing(plus I'm pretty sure at some point it was mentioned that someone could go crazy after MANY dips in the pit, but I don't remember where I read that so don't quote me), and Cass using asl is a misunderstanding of how reading body language works.

The one fanon trope I will never understand, however, is Stephanie's apparent waffle obsession. Where did this come from?? She has nothing to do with waffles. I remember her eating waffles at some point, and hey maybe even she said she liked them who knows?? But how does that justify waffles becoming a major part of her fanon personality????

I've seen Bruce eat a sandwhich before, but nobody calls him sandwhich obsessed. I'm pretty sure that Jason said he liked chili dogs at some point but nobody makes an ao3 tag about it. Why is Stephanie eating waffles different?? Was there a major plot point in which she fell in love with a waffle or something that I didn't read?? I wouldn't put it past dc writers to do that, but if the reasoning behind this is anything less than her marrying a damn waffle I plan on shooting somebody.

Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.

[sageiii]

I like to think that within dc there's a whole genre of fics where different heroes are different celebrities, mainly for jokes, like "hahaha lookie here gordon ramsey is superman lol" but one day someone makes a batman as bruce wayne one and the more research they do the more they're like wait... why does this kinda add up.. 🤔🤔 and it becomes a whole conspiracy

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Sometimes fics will pull out the most beautiful religious allegories in their writing and I'll just be sobbing, nodding along as if I didn't fail sunday school

[sageiii]

So I've fallen into the peter parker in Gotham fic pipeline lately and I see a lot of dick grayson being richard parker from another universe which is genuis, HOWEVER I think it'd be infinity more funny if they actually weren't they same person but the bats just assumed they were.

[sageiii]

The best way to get insight on someone's personality is to make a reference to something that doesn't exist and see whether or not they call you out on it

[sageiii]

Helena: Y'know, you really remind me of Cassie's friend Robin. Weird.

Tim, sweating: Yeah so weird

Sandrake AU where all of canon is the same but Helena Sandsmark gets custody of Tim after his parents death so instead of having a fake uncle Tim has to figure out how to be Robin while living with Wondergirl

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I see a lot of ppl talking about how Jason should be reconciling with Bruce after learning that Tim basically forced his way into being Robin. But A: he was mad over more than just the Tim thing. And B: he probably wouldn't beleive it.

Like in most versions of his orgin(including the original if we dont count circus Jason) Bruce very easily gives Jason Robin, like my guy didn't even ask for it or anything it was just handed to him. And Dick was all mad because he was just fired from Robin because it was too unsafe, but Bruce does his whole "it's to help himmmm 😖😖😖 so he doesn't become a criminal and stufff" and things become more okay. So I imagine when Jason is told "but Tim forced his way into being Robinn" he's like yeah sure no fucking way am I falling for THAT.

Like he's just thinking that if Bruce gave Jason Robin so easily after his whole realization about the dangers of child soldiers with Dick, then it's not too crazy to think(ESPEXIALLY after Bruce didn't kill the Joker so to jason it looks like he jusy didn't gaf), then it's not too much of a jump to think that after a whole realization about the dangers of child soldiers with Jason, that Bruce jusy found a new one.

Just, like. Consider it fir a minute

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Just had a mental breakdown, and im not even saying this to be edgy im just so weirded out??

I was like full on sobbing and shit?? For no reason?? Like I'm not a crybaby or nothing but usually when I cry I've stleast got a reason?? And my mind was somehow completely clear like, barely any thoughts during it??? Like no music playing, no background thoughts, just sad. It was actually really weird and I would've liked it if i wasn't busy being sad. Okay so thought over I'm gonna go forget about this niw

[sageiii]

Young justice as random ass things ive overhead

—

Cissie: I have more reason than that baby to be screaming right now

—

Cassie: Yeah, cucumbers are great for salads and all but yknow what they're REALLY good in?

Tim, putting his hands up and walking away: Genuinly what is wrong with you?

Cassie, yelling after him: I was gonna say sandwiches! You're the weird one here!

—

Anita: Do you even have life goals like, at all?

Kon: I do. Get rich, scare fish

Anita: Ignoring the scare fish part—

Kon: It had a nice rhyme to it

Anita: —how the hell do you plan to get rich?

Kon: I'll marry a billionaire

Anita: What billionaire would wanna marry you?

Cassie: When I become a billionaire I'll marry you

Kon: See? It all works out

Slobo: Only Cassie will never be getting rich so you'll need a back up plan here

Kon: Easy. Suicide

Cassie: Well damn guess I really do need to get rich now

Kon: No pressure

—

Bart, after a very long yap session: Oh yeah! And I saw this really cute cat earlier—

Tim, groaning before walking away: Would you stop talking for two minutes?

Bart, after a beat of silence: He hate cats or something?

Kon: No, that's not—

Cassie: Yes.

[sageiii]

Fix-it au that includes Bruce giving up a large portion of his money and staying middle to upper middle class because giving away his money would do so much more for Gotham than beating criminals up ever could

[sageiii]

I've decided to challenge myself in creating ocs for as many different dc groups as possible. Why? No idea. But anways here's the first: Misha my pookie bookie and member of the batfam(selina and bruce actually get married in this verse cause I'm not a pussy like so many dc writers)

[sageiii]

My favorite hc is bernard being a popular online conspiracy theorist and that the biggest decision for his channel is whether to introduce his boyfriend as Timothy Drake-Wayne or (Red) Robin

[sageiii]

Reblog if you're hoping 2011 will be a fresh start.

[sageiii]