#;v; i got this ask yesterday night as I was supposed to try and sleep

[jaxonkreide]

You can't imagine how much time I spend staring at your frostiron artworks!! The way you use colors is so unique and beautiful and I love it so much 💕😍👌👌👌👏👏👏💗

ahhh, thank you anon!! o///o

ksjhdlfsd personally, I often try to make something appealing with the colors? But often I feel like I don’t quite manage to achieve what I’ve been intending to do 

especially now that I have a new drawing tablet and it shows all the colors so much more vibrant than my laptop screen which makes me fret over the fact if other people see it more like I have drawn it on my tablet or as it is on my laptop which really, looks super bad khsdf

thank you, I did not realize people liked the stuff I do with colors as it’s mostly just me messing around and not being super satisfied with the results 😅

[cdelphiki]

Kid Jason and Bruce bonding over cars, 5k words of fluff, no archive warnings apply.

“Good morning, lad,” Alfred said, one Saturday morning just as Jason stepped into the kitchen, “What would you like for breakfast?”

He’d skipped ‘family’ breakfast in favor of sleeping in, which Alfred had said multiple times was perfectly acceptable. He was 12, after all, and needed his sleep. 

With a smile, Jason started crossing the kitchen, over to the pantry, as he said, “Hi, Alfred. I was just gonna get some cereal.”

“Then help yourself, lad.”

Despite saying ‘help yourself,’ Alfred both got him a bowl and the milk out, but otherwise let Jason pour himself the cereal. He then traded Jason the milk for a spoon before going back to whatever he was preparing before. Kinda looked like bread. He was kneading dough, whatever it was.

“What’s Bruce doing in the garage?” Jason asked, after he’d watched Alfred for a few minutes and got through half his bowl of cereal.

Alfred rolled the dough up into a loaf shape and dropped it down into a glass pan as he said, “Why don’t you go see for yourself?”

He didn’t even look over, but Alfred must have heard Jason frown, or something, because he then asked, “You like cars, don’t you?”

“Well yeah,” Jason stammered. He did like cars, but why did that mean he had to go ask Bruce what he was doing? “I just don’t want to bother him.”

Bruce was obviously doing work or something. He had spent almost the whole week working, and then had to take Jason out yesterday, so he probably had stuff he had to get done around the house, right? With… the tools.

“You won’t be bothering him,” Alfred said, like he thought it was impossible for Jason to bother Bruce, “I’m sure he will be more than happy to tell you about the work he’s doing on his cars.”

So he was doing work then.

Just… on his cars…

Jason looked down into his bowl and scooped out his last bite of cereal, contemplating whether he would go bother Bruce.

On the one hand, Bruce had said he would show Jason his cars if he just asked.

But on the other… he didn’t know. Things were good with Bruce so far, he was kind of scared if he bothered Bruce too much, he’d ruin it.

But as soon as Jason set his bowl back down, after finishing off the milk, Alfred walked over and took it, saying, “Go on, lad.”

And, well. Jason was supposed to listen to Alfred, right?

Back at the door to the garage, though, Jason hesitated. Bruce was back rummaging through the toolbox, but his Volkswagen was moved out to the middle of the floor, out of its normal parking spot in the line of cars away from the doors.

He didn’t turn around, though, when Jason hesitatingly pulled the door open and stepped down onto the the little set of three stairs that led to the garage floor. It wasn’t until he found whatever it was, it looked like a funnel from where Jason was standing, did he turn around and notice Jason.

“Hey, bud,” he said, as he pulled a little earbud out of his ear, “what’s up?”

“Alfred said I should come see what you were doing.”

Bruce nodded and put his little earbud in a case on the work bench as he said, “Oh, well I’m changing the oil on the cars today.”

“All of them?” Jason surveyed the garage and couldn’t help but think doing something like that would take ages.

“Most of them,” Bruce nearly hummed, as he opened the driver’s door to the Volkswagen and leaned inside. A second later, the hood popped.

Jason hopped down the last two steps and walked over toward one of the lines of cars, the one with the red lambo he’d been drooling over every time he was in the garage. He hadn’t had a chance to actually look at it, though. Because every time he was in the garage, Bruce was ushering him someplace or another.

Bruce peeked over at him, but didn’t say anything when Jason put his hand down on the hood of the car. It was gorgeous. Shiny and flawless. Not a single scratch on it anywhere Jason could see.

It was obvious it was taken care of, but Jason would have never thought Bruce did the work.

“Don’t you have people for that?” Jason asked, as Bruce opened the hood on the Volkswagen and propped it open like he’d done it a million times.

With seventy-four cars, he probably had done it a million times.

“Have you seen people around here I’m not aware of?” Bruce asked, a hint of amusement in his voice as he checked the car’s oil, using the little stick thing. Jason had never actually seen someone do that before. Mostly because his parents hadn’t owned a car. He’d seen people do that on TV and stuff, though.

“No one’s mechanic lives with them,” Jason scoffed, turning fully from the Lamborghini to watch Bruce. Although Jason wouldn’t put it past a rich weirdo with a million cars to have a live-in mechanic.

Bruce huffed, what Jason assumed was a laugh, but he said, “I’m my own mechanic,” as he started messing with something in the car. Jason was kinda curious what.

“Why?”

“Is it so wrong I have a hobby?” Bruce asked, looking up at Jason finally.

“Yeah, it’s weird,” Jason answered with a shrug, “You’re rich.” Rich people had hobbies there were like, horses. Horses and… well. Jason didn’t actually know, outside of illegal stuff, obviously.

“I like working on my own cars,” Bruce said, as he walked back over to his tool box and slipped on some gloves, “At least, on the cars I can work on. Some of these are just easier to bring to the dealership.”

“Really? Why?” Jason asked, looking back around at all the cars. Bruce actually had about ten cars, mostly sport cars, “Which ones?”

“It’s all the computer systems in the newer cars, I don’t feel like owning the equipment for every single car, especially if I don’t drive that car much, anyway. And cars like the Tesla you have to get parts for on the blackmarket, and it’s far more trouble than it’s worth.”

With a slight grin, Jason asked, “So you’re saying you don’t buy stuff from the black market,” as he pointed to himself when Bruce looked over. Regardless of his intentions, Bruce had exchanged money for him. Which was technically buying a child on the blackmarket.

Bruce just rolled his eyes, though, and said, “I try not to.”

“Why do you own like ten cars?” Jason asked, as he started inspecting the other cars in the line he was at. Next to the Lamborghini was a sleek black sports car and Jason was pretty sure was a corvette. He really needed to study the symbols on cars more. It was a little ‘V’ on the hood, so he was like, 98% sure.

“There’s only nine here and one is Alfred’s,” Bruce said, like that made a difference, “and I like cars. They’re fun to collect.”

“Do you actually drive them all? You always pick the Tesla when we go anywhere.” Or that one time the Volkswagen.

Although maybe Bruce brought the sports cars out on his dates or whatever he did at night. Jason had never watched him leave or anything.

Bruce leaned back over the Volkswagen’s engine compartment as he said, “I try to drive each one at least once a month, even if it’s just around the block.”

“Oh,” he said, shoving his hands into his hoody pocket. He was wearing his Wayne Enterprises one, since he’d sweated all over the Batman one.

Maybe Bruce was right and he needed a summer hoody or something, because it was hot in the garage, too. Since the door was open to the outside and all…

Jason walked over to the open garage door and leaned back against the threshold between inside and outside and asked, “How often do you do this?” as he motioned at everything inside the garage.

“Every six months,” Bruce said, as he wiped the sweat off his forehead with his t-shirt sleeve. Then he stood up and looked straight as Jason as he asked, “Do you want to help?”

“What?” Help?

Bruce would actually let Jason help?

“Come here,” Bruce motioned with his head for Jason to come over, “I’ll show you what I’m doing.”

Jason pushed off the wall and took an aborted step forward as he asked, “Really?” Couldn’t he like, fuck up the car horribly??

Why would Bruce want him to help?

“Of course, this is a good skill to know. One day you’ll have a car of your own to take care of.”

“I will?” Jason asked, a little dazed as he did cross the garage to where Bruce was working.

Not many people owned cars, where he was from. He’d never actually dreamed that one day he’d own a car.

But maybe he should have. Because… if he got a real job, like doctor or lawyer or something, then he’d have enough money to buy one.

And if he did that, he’d probably need one to get to work and stuff.

“Of course,” Bruce said, like he hadn’t even thought the opposite. Once Jason had fully approached the car, and inched up to the side of the engine compartment, across from Bruce, he said, “Okay, tell me what all you know about cars.”

“Uh,” Jason stammered. He didn’t know much about cars, in the grand scheme of things. He’d only recently been able to research them! “Well. I know that’s the engine,” he continued, pointing to where the engine was, hiding under a cover, “And it has, uh, cylinders and pistons…”

He trailed off, but when he looked back up at Bruce, Bruce was smiling brightly, like Jason had said the right thing, so he tried to return the smile.

“Great, you already know more than most drivers,” Bruce said, as he walked back over to his workbench. He grabbed a pair of gloves and held them out for Jason as he said, “Engines have oil in them we need to change, to make sure it’s staying clean. Dirty oil damages the engine, which can cause some serious problems. Engines also burn off oil, so changing it ensures we’re keeping enough in there for the engine to work properly.”

Jason listened attentively as he rolled his sleeves up and pulled the gloves on. Bruce went to on explain how they were going to get the old oil out, replace it, and change the oil filter. He’d known kind of vaguely the basics of all that, but he’d never heard it be explained in detail.

Bruce walked him through everything, and even let Jason do some of the work. Like pull out the old oil filter and insert the oil extractor down into the car. Bruce took a step back once he showed Jason what to do, and even let Jason extract all the oil. By himself.

It was actually super easy. No wonder Bruce did his own oil changes.

While Jason was watching the oil slowly drain from the engine and into the extractor, Bruce went and got two huge bottles of oil off the shelf, which was stocked with, like, twenty bottles of the stuff.

“That much?” It looked like he had two gallons of oil, or more. Probably more. The bottles were bigger than milk jugs.

“Yes,” Bruce said, as he set the two bottles on the ground next to the extractor, “This car needs almost six quarts.”

Jason had no idea how much that was, because who measured shit in quarts?? But he nodded and watched from the side of the car as Bruce took the extractor out and slipped the funnel in, then poured the entirety of one of the bottles in.

It wasn’t until he started pouring in the second bottle did Bruce say, “Okay, I need you to pull the dip stick out and check the level.”

Jason bounced back around to the front of the car, so he could reach the dip stick. Bruce stepped to the side, further out of the way, but couldn’t go too far since he was still holding the bottle over the funnel, but it was fine. Jason could reach it just fine.

“Pull it out and wipe it off,” Bruce explained, when Jason located the dip stick, “then dip it back in. That will give you an accurate reading.”

Nodding, Jason grabbed the rag Bruce had set next to the dip stick and did exactly as told. Once he had the ‘accurate’ reading he held it up into the sun and squinted at it, trying to figure out if he was supposed to be able to tell if it was low. “Uh, it’s below the bottom dot.”

“That means we don’t have enough in there. You want the oil between the two dots.”

“Ah.” Jason nodded, and watched as Bruce poured more into the engine, a little at a time.

Each time he had Jason check the levels again, until the line was almost all the way to the top dot. Once it was, Bruce nodded contentedly and said, “That’s good enough,” and put the bottle of oil back down on the ground, “Now we just have to put the new filter in and we’re done.”

Doing that was a piece of cake. It was basically just the reverse as removing it. Then Bruce had Jason put the engine cover on by himself and they were done.

Just like that.

“Great job,” Bruce said, as he removed the stick holding the hood open, then motioned for Jason to step back so he could drop it shut. Jason jumped when the hood slammed closed, but then smiled when Bruce added, “You’re a pro already.”

“This is some people’s job,” Jason said, as he stepped back into the sunlight, shining in through the open garage door behind him, where he could get a good look at all of Bruce’s cars.

“It sure is,” Bruce said, “Mechanics is a very good field to go into. We’ll always have a need for mechanics.”

“Unless all the rich assholes start doing it themselves,” Jason said, walking along the edge of the driveway, toward the other row of cars on the other side of the garage.

Bruce huffed as he peeled his gloves off and tossed them over at the work bench. “If I crashed one of these,” he said, walking back to the Volkswagen with the key in his hand, “or the engine failed or something drastic, I’d let a mechanic fix it. I just do the routine, easy things.”

“Oh.” Jason supposed that made sense. It probably wasn’t fun if it was super tedious or whatever.

While Bruce started up the Volkswagen and backed it up into its spot, in the row of cars across the way from Jason, he wandered down the new row of vehicles.

All of the cars Bruce or Alfred drove the most were closer to the door to the Manor, so that’s where the Tesla and Bentley were. On this side was some cars Jason didn’t even recognize. He’d need to do a lot of research on fancy-ass sports cars to figure them out, too.

That was, until he stopped on the last car in the row and recognized the SRT logo on the side of the grille.

“No way,” he whispered to himself, as he circled the car.

There was no way it was what he thought it was.

He’d just seen a documentary… or four… about this car three days ago. It was an expensive car, sure, but not like million dollars expensive. It wasn’t even 100k, if he remembered right. He hadn’t been expecting Bruce to have one.

Then again, Bruce owned a Volkswagen. And this was an awesome car.

“You like that one?” Bruce asked, from across the garage.

“Is this a Hellcat?” Jason asked, before he cupped his hands around his eyes so he could try to peek inside. Sadly the tinted windows were too dark, though, so he stood back up and looked over at Bruce.

And Bruce looked… delighted. That was the only way Jason could describe it. He looked delighted.

“It sure is.”

“Dude,” Jason exclaimed, excitement bubbling up in him so quickly he felt like he would burst, “No way! What year is it? Does it really have a red key? How fast does it go? Why don’t you drive this one everywhere!”

Bruce grinned probably the most genuine grin Jason had ever seen but he couldn’t even though about it, because holy shit. He was right!!!

This was like, one of his favorite cars ever.

He’d watched four different documentaries, all on youtube, all because of the red key and how the regular black key governed the engine but the red key unlocked over seven hundred horse power.

And besides being so fucking cool that a car could go so fast, it was such a funny image, picturing seven hundred horses pulling a car.

Bruce walked over to the key lock box, up near the door to the manor, and put his Volkswagen key away. Before he shut it, though, he pulled out a bright red key and Jason just about lost it.

“Oh my God, that’s so cool.”

“Do you want to go for a ride?” Bruce asked, holding the key up, but not yet crossing the garage.

“Are you serious?” Jason asked. Bruce unlocked the doors in answer, so Jason exclaimed, “Yes!” and quickly rounded to the passenger side to open the door and look inside.

The first thing that hit him was the new car smell.

Such a wonderful, beautiful smell. Probably one of his favorites.

“This is so cool,” he whispered, in hushed awe as he slipped into the passenger seat.

There was a backseat, but there was almost no windows back there, and barely any space, and he wanted to see. Not be trapped and blind to everything happening. So Jason buckled himself into the passenger seat and just hoped Bruce wouldn’t make him move.

But Bruce just walked around to the driver door, smiling softly as he slid in and buckled himself in. “Feeling good?” he asked, as he dropped the key into the cup holder.

Good????

Jason was fucking ecstatic.

“Are you gonna go fast?”

In answer, Bruce pressed down on the brake and pressed the start button, then revved the engine loudly.

“I can’t believe this is happening,” Jason said under his breath, trying not to grin too wide when Bruce put the car in drive and slowly pulled out of the parking spot.

“Tell me if it’s too much,” Bruce said. Jason didn’t even have enough time to agree, though, before Bruce lined the car up with the garage door and then gunned it.

Mostly because Jason was too busy laughing, watching the trees and bushes that lined the driveway speed by.

He only had to slow down a little for the gate, because somehow he told it to start opening before they got anywhere near it.

“You’re gonna get pulled over,” Jason said, through his laughter as Bruce hit 60 MPH out on the road outside the estate. On a road with a speed limit of 20.

“Probably,” Bruce agreed, obviously not caring one bit as he shifted gears and started going faster.

The car only his 70, though, before he slowed down to come to a stop sign at the end of their long, semi-private road.

“Okay, we have a couple options here,” Bruce said, looking over at Jason, “There’s a high school with a large parking lot we can play in, or there’s an industrial area with a network of roads that are deserted on Saturdays. Which do you think sounds better?”

Jason fidgeted in his chair, but asked, “Which one can you go faster on?”

“The industrial complex,” Bruce said, immediately turning the car to the left and zipping off again.

Bruce did keep the speed down, though, as they drove through all the little neighborhoods. Which was probably good, because Jason saw a few kids playing in their yards, and hitting a kid would probably be super bad.

But it only took a couple minutes before they were suddenly staring at a wide open straight road.

A huge wide open straight road, with four lanes running in either direction.

Obviously it was meant for tons and tons of traffic, but true to Bruce’s word, it was completely deserted.

“This was built up to be a large industry area,” Bruce explained, as he pulled onto the road and came to a stop right in the middle of it, “and there ended up being only two companies to move here. It’s one of my favorite places to play with a car.”

“It looks like a race track,” Jason observed, leaning forward in his seat so he could see over the dash, at the brake marks on the street right in front of them.

“It’s used as one. Ready?”

Quickly, Jason sat back in his seat again and nodded enthusiastically.

He was so ready.

Bruce smiled and put one hand on the wheel, the other on the clutch, then floored it.

Jason it thrown back into the seat hard, they accelerated so fast.

And all Jason could do was laugh.

Bruce treated the road like it’s a race track, circling it several times, making the car slide sometimes in his turns, the tires squealing as he did, every single time making Jason laugh harder.

It was the coolest fucking thing Jason had ever done.

They drove for nearly half an hour, Bruce driving around some of the smaller roads around the big huge buildings, and even doing a donut in the middle of a parking lot. Jason just knew that had to be terrible for the tires, but it was so cool to do.

So, so cool.

But eventually, Bruce did turn back to the manor, and by then, Jason’s stomach and cheeks hurt from laughing so much.

“You like this car, huh?” Bruce said, once they were going slow again, back through the neighborhoods with the kids.

“This is like, my dream car, dude,” Jason said, sitting back up to look at all the buttons on the dash. He hadn’t paid much attention to any of them. “Or, well, one of them.”

He had technically just learned about it a few days before, but that didn’t mean it hadn’t instantly become a dream car.

Bruce held a hand out, motioning at the radio as if saying ‘go ahead, mess with it,’ so Jason did.

He pressed all the buttons.

“Why is a Hellcat one of your dream cars?” Bruce asked, after Jason had figured out how to work the radio and was flipping through the seventy-billion satellite channels.

“I watched a bunch of youtube videos about these the other day,” he said, “I thought they were so cool with the red key. And badass looking too. I didn’t know you had one.”

“What are your other dream cars?” Bruce asked, as he grabbed the red key from the cup holder and held it out for Jason to take.

Happily, Jason took it and started inspecting it, looking at all the buttons in it, before he found a little switch that released the actual key from inside.

Although, obviously the car didn’t need the key. It needed the chip inside the key, that told the computer it was present.

“There’s a lot,” Jason eventually said, as he kept playing with the key. He couldn’t really think of car names, though. “I’ve seen a lot of really cool cars. I just never got to research them until, ya know. You gave me a laptop and stuff.”

“Right,” Bruce said, slowly, “What have you been researching on your laptop?”

“I saw an episode of some show about Roush Mustangs,” Jason said, as he dropped the key back into the cupholder and pulled his legs up on the seat, to sit criss crossed, “those look cool. Although your lambo is way cooler. Your Tesla is awesome, too. I always wanted to see a Tesla in person, then you had one.”

“The Tesla is my favorite commuter car,” Bruce said, as he shifted gears and sped up, now they were back on the semi-private road that led to the manor, “but almost all my other cars are more fun to drive.”

Jason nodded. He could see that, since the Tesla literally drove itself. “This one looks so fun to drive.”

“Tell you what,” Bruce said, once he reached the gate to the manor. This time, he had to come to a complete stop and type in his code and do the eye thing, “If you’re still here when you’re 15, I’ll tech you to drive on this car.”

“What?” Jason said, a little stunned. Because, “really??” He hadn’t even… thought that far ahead.

Not like that, at least. He’d only thought about getting through living with Bruce until he was 18, so he could move out and go to college.

But obviously if he was going to make it to 18, that would mean being here when he was 15 or 16, and…. well. That was when kids were supposed to learn to drive.

Why would he have ever thought Bruce would do that, though?? Teach him to drive??

That was what parents were supposed to do for their kids, and Jason was just a foster kid Bruce got stuck with, because Gordon made Bruce take him.

But, but, but… Bruce said he cared about him… so…

“With the red key?” Jason eventually asked, as Bruce pulled the car into the garage, and started slowly backing it up into its spot.

He paused, however, to give Jason a flat look as he said, “No.” He couldn’t hold the face, though, because he started laughing and added, “No way, with the regular key.”

“Aw.”

Although he supposed 500 horsepower was nothing to sneeze at.

“But,” Bruce said, “I might let you test out the red key, once you prove you’re a good driver.”

“Really?” Jason asked, sitting up straighter in his seat, trying to gauge Bruce’s sincerity.

He didn’t look like he was lying, so Jason cheered, “All right! I can’t wait to be 15.”

“Why don’t you focus on turning 13, first,” Bruce said, cutting the car off.

“Fine,” Jason whined, collapsing back into his seat dramatically. He righted himself quickly, though, to unfasten his seatbelt and hop out. “That was so cool, though.”

Bruce got out of the car himself, and just watched with a smile as Jason bounced up to the front of the car, to look at it and all the bugs they picked up.

Poor bugs, they didn’t stand a chance.

“I’m glad you enjoyed it.”

Jason whirled around, a second later, when Alfred cleared his throat from the manor door.

“If you gentlemen are done, lunch has been waiting for you for quite a while. Do come eat it before it gets any colder.”

“Sorry, Alfred,” Jason said, at the same time Bruce said, “Sure thing, Alf.”

Alfred quickly retreated, so Jason turned to Bruce and asked, “Is he mad at us?”

“Nah.” Bruce shut his door and started walking to the manor door, but stopped when Jason didn’t start moving in step. “He’s not mad, Jason. That’s the face he makes when he’s very happy and doesn’t know how to show it.”

“Oh.” He wasn’t quite sure why Alfred would be ‘very happy,’ but Jason wouldn’t complain about that.

Bruce took a step forward, so this time Jason followed along, and stopped on the steps as Bruce put the key back in the box.

“You’re really going to teach me how to drive on that?” he asked, pointing back at the Hellcat. He kind of had a hard time believing it.

“Yes, I promise,” Bruce said, smiling when Jason shot him a grin.

“All right!” Jason cheered, grinning so wide his face started hurting again. “No take backs, okay?” he said, holding his fist out toward Bruce, “Fist bump.”

Now it was Bruce’s turn to be startled, apparently, because he looked at Jason’s fist like he had no idea what to do as he said, “What?”

“You’re hopeless,” Jason groaned, slouching dramatically before he straightened up and reached for one of Bruce’s hands. “Look, it’s easy.”

Bruce lifted his hand cautiously, and let Jason forced his fingers to form a fist as he said, “Make a fist. There. Okay, now pound it.” Jason make his own fist again and bumped it against Bruce’s hand, grinning wide again. “There. No take backs, we fist bumped.”

“Uh, yes,” Bruce said, like he couldn’t figure out what to fucking say. His smile grew wide, though, and then morphed into something fonder. “I swear it, no take backs.”

Jason fidgeted, under Bruce’s stare, so he quickly pushed open the door as he said, “Come on. Alfred said lunch is getting cold.”

He didn’t want to think about whatever Bruce was thinking.

They’d just had a freaking awesome time, Jason was not about to ruin it. No sir.

So he skipped on ahead, to the kitchen where Alfred had a couple paninis sitting on the counter, and just focused on the fact that Bruce was going to teach him to drive.

In the Hellcat.

All because Jason liked the car.

How fucking awesome was that????

This is chapter 46 of Reclaiming Innocence, slightly edited to read as a one-shot. Link to story can be found on my masterlist. 

[shingia]

i’m not sure if you’ve gotten this request before (feel free to ignore if u have loll) but could i request how hq boys would help u when ur hungover.... cause i am big time rn LMAO please and thanks <33

✗ HQ BOYS WHEN YOU’RE HUNGOVER ✗

the way i ran to my drafts to start writing this omg 🏃🏻‍♀️ ngl it almost made me miss being hungover <\33 anyways- hope you’ll feel better v soon and are taking care of your poor hungover self 😽

-> timeskip! kita, kuroo, tsukishima, suna, oikawa

-> warnings : mentions of alcohol (for obvious reasons), mentions of throwing up and mentions of food

— KITA

• this man knows how to handle a hangover better than anyone

• he’s a moderate drinker, but his grandmother’s books contain the cure to everything and he’s more than willing to make you benefit from his knowledge

• he will make you drink these three bottles of water, that bowl of tomato soup and that banana milkshake with a tablespoon of honey. dehydration ? he doesn’t know her

• but kita also knows how important it is to not stay in bed all day, so he’ll insist on having you spend at least thirty minutes outside in the fresh air, most probably in your backyard

• you can refuse, of course. but he’ll take away your cuddle privilege immediately, so~ your choice

• also expect a lot a few disapproving looks,,, because as much as he loves to pamper you, he can’t help but remember the dozens of times he told you you’d had enough to drink last night. obviously you didn’t listen

• i think would disapprovingly care : like- lecturing you under his breath as he sprays essential oils on your bedsheets or tests the temperature of the bath water before letting you in

• remember the cuddle privilege i talked about? yeah, that’s going to be your reward at the end of the day for not being stubborn and docilely following his instructions

• with freshly perfumed bedsheets and his natural body warmth, you’re likely to fall asleep in five second tops. but that doesn’t mean he’s going to leave you, quite the contrary. no, this man will continue to take care of you in your sleep

• and by that i mean belly rubs to make sure your nausea is gone when you wake up, or gentle head massages to make your migraine go away. he might even brush your hair so that you won’t wake up with knots

• he doesn’t even expect you to thank him, because « isn’t that what all husbands are supposed to do ? »

— KUROO

• he’s probably hungover too because he had to finish half of your drinks,,, yet it still wasn’t enough to prevent you from waking up with the biggest headache

• in other words : dimmed lights all day. he might not even open the blinds. and to be honest he likes these kind of vibes

• sure, it feels like your brains are about to explode, and every single part of your body is aching (eyelashes included), but it’s cozy and your minds are too fogged to worry about anything other than getting better- so it’s self care and self care only today

• it’s likely that none of you will feel like eating something, but kuroo’s an athlete : he knows better than to skip a meal, especially when you both feel so weak

• so he’ll sacrifice himself and make the grueling effort of leaving the bed to cook you a little something, nothing extravagant but still enough to reinvigorate the two of you

• and since you don’t have anything better to do, you guys decide to watch the videos you took during the party,,, and slowly come to the realization that you have very few memories of what happened

• « is that you dancing on that table ? » you ask him, pointing at the man who is just a second away from tripping on a napkin

• lifting his shorts, kuroo glances at the bruise on the upper part of his thigh : « ohh- well that explains a lot »

• chances are that, because of his built, kuroo will feel better before you. so the true pampering will come later in the evening

• he’s got vitamins, ibuprofens, blankets, and his arms ready for you. you’re in for the deepest sleep of your life

— TSUKISHIMA

• « i told you so »™️

• you would wake up feeling like absolute crap and he would be eyeing you, standing next to the bed with his arms crossed and eyebrows raised : « how are we feeling ? », even though the answer is pretty obvious

• but he knows that sarcasm won’t get him anywhere so he tries to tone it down (try to)

• you might think he’s not going to do much, but as soon as you step out of the shower he forced you to take (even though you were exhausted), you realize that he did do much

• the clothes you wore last night are already in the washing machine, your new ones (most probably his) are neatly folded on your bed, waiting for you, and he’s cooking an anti-hungover meal that he looked up on the internet

• if he has to study while you’re getting some rest in the bedroom he will put reminders on his phone every 15mn to come and check on you

• and he never leaves the room without lifting the covers up to your shoulders to make sure you won’t get cold

• he also wets a towel and gives it to you to place over your eyes if they’re sore

• but as soon as he’s done studying, he joins you in bed with greatest pleasure. and it’s a good thing that tsukki loves comfortable silences, because neither of you feel like saying anything

• you’re just laying there, letting him keep track of time since you’re too busy enjoying being pampered that much

— SUNA

• blackmail material for YEARS (in addition to the videos and pictures he took of you during the party)

• he turns this into a vlog, you could be half-asleep on the couch and hear him talk to the camera from the kitchen like « so here i am making pasta for this lightweight who threw up all night... i’m still waiting for my boyfriend of the year’s award... »

• but really, he’s just being dramatic. deep down he loves to take care of you when you’re hungover because you get much clingier,,, so he allows himself to be clingier too

• as much as he loves to lay down on top of you, the roles are reversed this time. because being crushed by a 6’3 tall man while you’re hungover is probably not a very good idea

• but before these lazy cuddles, he wants to make sure you’re comfortable : so he’ll remove your makeup (if you wore any) and give you his clothes because he knows you like how oversize they are

• so yes, naps and water are definitely the keywords of the day, but tell him once that you crave one specific food and he’ll immediately go get it for you

• he’s also surprisingly careful with any possible headache, so he’ll keep his earphones on while scrolling on his phone to make sure you can rest in complete silence

• however, at some point he will hand you his phone and have you record a video for your future self. something along the lines of : « hi y/n, this is you from the past. i feel like absolute shit right now so please be more reasonable next time... and don’t let rin get more embarrassing pictures of us »

• and you can be sure that he’ll use this video as a threat next time you’re partying. he would just have to point at his phone from the other side of the room and you would understand what he means

— OIKAWA

• he’s not the person to call if you want to be talked out of partying ever again

• because not only does he spend the entire day praising you highly for the way you looked yesterday, but you also realize that he loves your drunk self (as long as he’s here to watch over you)

• he doesn’t mind you complaining because he’s had a few hangovers of his own,, so feel free to whine about your stomachache/headache all you want

• and if you throw up ? it’s ok, he’s got you. and he’s not leaving your side unless you ask him to

• literally, he spends the entire day babying you. you’re feeling too tired to brush your teeth ? no problem, he’ll have you sit on the edge of the bathtub and do it for you

• same goes for washing your hair or getting dressed : there’s nothing he’ll refuse

• if your head doesn’t hurt too much, he’ll offer to watch a stupid tv show in front of which you can fall asleep without missing anything important

• and he’ll make sure to get the right cuddle position right away because he knows you’ll probably fall asleep very quickly and he doesn’t want to wake you up by fidgeting under you

• also: expect many many scalp massages. and his hands are the softest so they feel absolutely divine

• i think oikawa knows a lot about hydration so he’ll probably make you drink something like sugary water to give you a little boost. and if you don’t trust this drink, he’ll try again with another one until you’re completely hydrated

• and as i said, he’s very supportive,, almost too much : « you finished your glass ! i’m proud of you baby! »

taglist : @toworuu @catwithangerissues @miyumiya @livy384 @k0u-minamo2 @fullsundear @hsjvwq @kelsuuki @hiraeth-z @velvetvirgos @kirishimas-manly-eyeliner @47meow @japanesevenom @geektastic84 @noir-blanches-blog @idontlikeyourjob @seiri-ami @atiny-grl-with-luv @admiringlove @nachotrash @kellesvt @aintyourholy @Moonlaeli @catchmewiddershins @duhsies @devilgirlcrybabiey @crystal-lilac @ijustwantfreenetflix @mimaki @maitenight

[fayemarvels]

Backseat rider

Peter Parker x fem!reader (She/her)

Inspo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wU9lOKWFG54

I tried to write this in the second person so please tell me how you like it.

Summary: Inspired by the wonderful song Backseat Rider by Sara Kays, with my little twist on it, and with a happy ending.

You and Peter have been friends for a long time, and he promised you the first ride in his car. When you come back from your Europe trip, MJ is sitting in the passenger side. The fact that you are in love with him doesn't really help.

Or: Peter promised you a ride in his car and his stupid plan fails because he is jealous.

Warnings: angst, fluff, bad writing, grammatical mistakes,

Word count: 5.1k

English isn't my first language so please don't mind the grammar and sentence structure mistakes and stuff. If you have any suggestions on how to improve my writing, please let me know.

! Please don't repost my work anywhere without my permission. Thank you!

My masterlist *******

----

9. September 2013

It was the first day of school and you were standing at a bus stop just a few blocks from your new apartment. You and your parents just moved to queens and you were starting in a new school.

With your new schoolbag which you got for your 12th birthday just 3 days ago slung over your shoulders, you tapped your foot nervously against the concrete under your newly polished shoes.

You were so excited to start 6th grade in a new school, away from the people in your old one. You were always a shy kid and some of the kids from your previous school picked on you just because of that.

The school became hell and you started making excuses as to why not to go in. At first, your parents were annoyed thinking you were just lazy. But you later opened up about your struggles and they started to take action.

But before much happened, one of your parents got a job opportunity in Queens, New York, and without much thinking, took it. When you left the school, you felt like you could finally breathe. A huge boulder fell off your shoulders and you were so excited to find some new friends and meet new people. To get a new start.

Due to the traffic, the bus came with a 7 minutes delay. And as the bus rounded the corner to arrive at the bus stop, a frazzled-looking boy came crashing into you.

Before you could crash to the ground, he caught your hand and pulled you towards him in an effort to save you from crashing into the hard ground.

“I am so so sorry, I didn’t mean to I fell asleep and burned my toast and spilled toothpaste on my shirt, and ” he took a deep breath before he continued with his rambling.

“Oh god I am so sorry, I’m rambling” He scratched the back of his neck.

“It’s alright, truly. But I would really appreciate it if you let me go.” You said quietly and the boy’s eyes widened in horror.

“Sorry, sorry” he kept apologizing and mumbling underneath his breath.

“Please stop apologizing, nothing much happened,” You laughed lightly and he breathed out in relief.

“I’m Peter, by the way, Peter Parker,” he introduced himself more calmly. Now, that he wasn’t rambling and frantically running his hands through his hair, you could finally focus on his features. He was slightly shorter than you, with curly brown hair and chocolate brown eyes that were still tinted with sleep.

“Nice to meet you Peter my name is (Y/N) (L/N).” You introduced yourself and you stepped together into the bus. You looked around for two places to sit, preferably together.

“There,” Peter pointed to the back of the bus. You pushed through the crowd of people standing and made it to the seats. Peter let you sit beside the window and sat beside you.

“The public transport in new york is so horrible,” Peter whined and you raised your eyebrow.

“Is it? I just moved in like 2 weeks ago so I didn’t have much time to explore.”

“Oh, so this is your first day of a new school.” His eyes widened in realization and you nodded.

“What school are you going into?” He asked and you could see the excitement in his eyes.

“Palm tree elementary school.” You answered and Peter jumped in his seat.

“Oh my, me too, that’s so exciting, Ned will be so happy,” he squealed you smiled widely.

You talked the rest of the ride to your stop, and through the short walk to your school. This boy might just make this school much more exciting than you thought.

20. August 2019

“Okay, just wait for me outside of your apartment building I’ll come and pick you up,” Peter said into the phone and you hummed in acknowledgment.

“Okay Petey, I’ll be waiting, I missed you so much throughout the summer, I’m sorry I didn’t call” you apologized feeling guilty.

“It’s okay, I get it, I was the one to suggest it. Okay, I’m leaving, I’ll be at yours in about 10 minutes. ”

You and your family went to Europe for the majority of summer. You tried to keep in contact but of course, it was hard the time difference made it very difficult to find a time where you both can call and don’t lose sleep.

The first person to stop trying was Peter. On a rare call one night, he informed you that he didn’t want you to lose sleep just because you wanted to talk to him

“Don’t worry, you’ll tell me everything when you get back, just don’t forget to bring me souvenirs.” Peter teased and you laughed sadly. You missed him so much and the heavy feeling in your heart wouldn’t go away.

“Okay, just prepare yourself because I’ve gotten you a souvenir from every single location we went to.” You sniffled.

“Hey, don’t cry, everything will be alright nothing will change I promise.”

10 minutes later, Peter pulled up to your parking lot and your heart skipped a beat. Your smile widened and the butterflies in your stomach fluttered. This was the first time you saw Peter after a month and a half. You returned from Europe only 4 days ago so you used that time to get rid of the jet lag.

Your smile dropped when you saw a shadow sitting on the passenger side. You shook your head and moved closer to the car. Peter stepped out of the car and you flung your arms around him. He tensed for a bit before he wrapped you up in his arms and breathed in your scent.

“I missed you so much, you have no idea,” he mumbled into your neck and you pressed your lips into his hair.

“I missed you too, for the last two weeks, my parents were a pain in the ass,” you complained and Peter laughed. Then he got serious.

“Well, at least you have parents.”

“...”

“I’m just kidding, don’t worry bug,” he giggled and you hit his shoulder lightly.

“I hate these jokes,” you complained.

“I know, that’s why I make them.” He giggled and you rolled your eyes.

“Okay. C’mon, I have my classmate MJ here, I wanted to introduce you two he stepped away and you wrapped yourself around yourself.”

Peter opened the back door for you and you thanked him. When you got into the car he closed the door behind you and quickly got into the driver seat.

“So MJ, this is (Y/N). Bug, this is MJ.” He introduced you two and you waved awkwardly.

“Hi, I heard about you so much, is so nice to meet you.” MJ greeted and you smiled.

“I would like to say the same but Peter has never talked of you,” you scratched your neck shyly and MJ waved her hand.

“It’s fine, me and Peter only started hanging out about 3 weeks ago, but we’ve gotten a lot closer.” She explained and you nodded.

“So, Peter told me you are in an art school,” Mj started and you shuffled to the edge of your seat so you could hear better.

“Yeah, I do interior design, color pallets, and furniture designs.” You explained and MJ nodded her head.

“That sounds really cool, you’ll be the first I’ll contact when I’m furnishing my house” MJ laughed and you giggled.

“Yeah sure, just give me a call,”

But then, it got quiet. You just relaxed against the seat behind you and closed your eyes for a few moments.

“So, I saw the star wars movies the other day, it was so good,” MJ exclaimed and Peter laughed out loud.

“I tried to get this lady into it but she hated it. The same with star trek.” Peter said, pointing at you.

“Yeah, I hate it so much,” you chimed in but they didn’t respond. They just continued laughing and talking without you. You couldn’t help but think that they looked so much like the two of you looked when you talked about both of your favorite things.

----

MJ sat in the passenger seat for the next five weeks. When you traveled to school, from school, or even during the weekends.

She was there every single time Peter came to pick you up. And to be honest, it hurt just a bit more every single time you saw her sitting in the front seat of his car.

-----

You and Peter were supposed to go to see the new astronomical exhibition today. You were getting ready in your room when your eyes drifted over a framed picture on your vanity table. It was taken last summer, before he got his car, before MJ. You had taken it with your Kodak disposable camera in a parking lot in front of your local Target. You remember it like it was yesterday.

21. July 2018

It was around 10 p.m. when you and Peter left the target with a plastic bag of candy and a brand new disposable camera that you found in the sale aisle. You tore the safety tape away from the box and pulled out the instruction manual.

“I’m so excited; I’ve never had any of these.” You exclaimed and Peter chuckled at your happy face, threw his arm around your shoulder, and pulled you in closer to him.

“You are going to love it, it’s so fun. Especially because you have no idea how the photos are gonna turn out.” He smiled and you nodded.

“I always watch the tiktoks of people’s reactions to the developed photos, and they always look so happy, I want to try it.” you declared and pulled the camera out of the box.

“First things first bug, just a quick info, you need a lot of lightning for the photos to turn out good,” Peter explained and you waved your hand mindlessly, messing around with your temporary camera.

You quickly pulled out your phone and turned on the flashlight. You put the phone on the ground in front of him and he looked at you puzzled.

“Will you do me a favor and be the first photo on this camera’s film?” You asked him and Peter nodded, acting very posh and snobby.

“It would be an honor, my lady,” he faked a bow and you burst out laughing.

“Okay smile for me,” you giggled and Peter smiled widely. He was so beautiful. Hair messy, and a hoodie a little too big on his body, with the long sleeves making cute sweater paws.

“Come onnn take the picture so we can eat the sweets,” Peter whined and you quickly snapped the picture of him. He bent down, took your phone from the ground, and turned off the flashlight.

“Come on I even got us and your fuzzy socks so your toes won’t get cold,” he said and you hugged him from behind.

“you are the best, you know that?” you mumbled and he shrugged.

“Might’ve mentioned it a few times before” You let him go and he pulled out the blanket from his backpack.

“Come on let’s sit here,” he pulled you towards the curb a few feet away from the spot you were standing at. He sat down, wrapped his arms around your legs, and rested his face on your stomach.

“Let’s sit here and eat all these delicious candies” he looked at you with wide eyes and you dragged your fingers through his hair, scratching at his scalp.

“Okay Doll, let’s do this,” you teased and he blushed hard.

“Stoop you know I blush when you call me that,” he complained and you laughed softly. You gently unwrapped his arms from your legs and sat down next to him.

“So, let dig in,” you rubbed your palms together and he put the bag between you two.

“I want the Reese’s,” you said and Peter handed them to you.

----

“Smiile,” you smushed your cheek against Peter’s and he smiled into the camera. The flash had gone off and you smiled to yourself.

“I bet this one’s gonna be so good.” He said and you nodded.

“So, as I was saying, May told me that she wants to buy me a car for my 18th birthday. I don’t know how she wants to do that but I’m not complaining.” Peter gushed and you wrapped your arms around his middle.

“I’m so happy for you, you deserve it.” You smiled and Peter continued.

“I want to take you on a road trip when we finish school. All around the US. From New York to L.A,” he looked at you hopefully and you smiled at him widely.

“That sounds so good, we can go to grand canyon and Zion and so much more, Oh my God, we will need so much more of these disposable cameras. Peter, we need so much food and tents and sleeping bags and maps.” You took a deep breath before you continued.

“We should make a checklist, we should start preparing, Peter why are we sitting here?” you asked and Peter gently shushed you by putting his pointer finger on your lips.

“We still have 2 years bug, no need to overthink it, everything is gonna be fine.” He assured you and you nodded.

“Come here,” he pulled you towards him and your head landed on his chest. You snuggled into his chest and breathed in his scent.

----

You were pulled back to reality when your phone rang. It was Peter.

“Hey (Y/N), we are nearly here, only about 4 minutes.” He informed and your breath got stuck in your throat. ‘WE’. MJ is coming with you. He didn’t ask, he didn’t inform you beforehand. He just invited her.

“Ummm Pete I’m suddenly not feeling very well, I think I should go and lay down, maybe you should go alone,” you mumbled and he hummed.

“Okay, get better alright? We can go somewhere tomorrow.” He suggested and you hummed in agreement, as you couldn’t do anything else without breaking down.

“Okay (Y/N) goodnight, get well soon. I’ll see you tomorrow” He didn’t wait for your response before he hung up.

You stared at the phone as the tears cascaded down your cheeks and you put no effort into stopping them. You slowly wiped off the makeup you put on just a few moments prior and threw out the cotton pad.

You stood up from your vanity and moved over to your bed. You couldn’t understand it. What have you done wrong? Just a few months prior, Peter would drop everything to be with you when you weren’t feeling that well. Now, he didn’t even ask what was wrong.

You cursed yourself as you tried to keep your sobs at bay. You lost him and it was all your fault. If you called more often or at least texted and kept in contact during the summer, everything would be fine. He wouldn’t be in his car with someone else but with you. But the more you thought about it the more your mind betrayed you,

‘Wait, he was the one to suggest that you two would stop the contact, did he get tired of you? Did he want to get rid of you? Is he sending signals by hanging out with MJ every single time they should be hanging out alone?’ the thoughts in your brain were running around before they suddenly stopped.

“He didn’t call me bug,” you realized. He always called you bug, never (Y/N). He only called you that when he was annoyed or angry with you. You started thinking back to every single hangout you had in the past 5 weeks to see if you could stumble upon a memory where you angered or annoyed him. Nothing.

Your shoulders sagged and you put your face in your hands.

“What should I do now,” you asked yourself as you tried to remain calm and not to let any more sobs out. As you looked around your room, slowly calming down, you saw a piece of Peter’s hoodie peeking out from your closet. In a rage of fury, sadness, and anger, you quickly gathered every single piece of clothing Peter ever gave you and put them in a cardboard box.

Taking out a piece of paper, you took your favorite pen and started writing a little note for your now ‘ex’ best friend.

Dear Peter, returning your clothes, maybe you can give them to MJ, now that she is your best friend and you don’t care about me. Could’ve at least told me you didn’t want me in your life anymore, instead of sending mixed signals and hurting me by that. Fuck you. – Love, (Y/N)

You signed it with fury coursing through your veins and closed the box with duct tape. You swiped the stray tears that fell down your cheeks and threw on a hoodie.

“Going out for a few minutes!” you shouted to your parents and closed the door, before hearing their response. After putting the hood up, you opened the window to the fire escape and you threw your legs over the window sill, taking the full cardboard box with you.

“Let’s do this,” you mumbled to yourself and dropped down to the ground.

----

The walk to Peter’s apartment didn’t take long, only about 10 minutes. But the walk felt so much longer this time, maybe because this would probably be the last time you would ever make it. You started tearing up just at that thought. You didn’t think this is how it would end. Six years of friendship ended just because you were too annoying. You shook your head and continued walking; you couldn’t afford to burst into tears in the middle of the road.

You stopped in front of Peter’s apartment and let out a shaky breath. This is it. You knew May would be at work, so you let yourself in with the key, underneath their doormat. You stepped into the apartment and closed the door behind you. You rushed into Peter’s room and threw the box on his bed. You didn’t want to linger around and experience the pain of remembering all of the memories you and Peter shared in this room.

You looked around one more time, and your eyes watered when you saw your favorite t-shirt thrown over his chair. You really wanted to take it but decided to against it. ‘He can do whatever he wants’ you thought and closed the door behind you.

The walk from his apartment wasn’t much better. But it was a bit shorter than the one before. You hadn’t had much time to think this time. You just came out of his building and in a few seconds, you were laying in your bed with tears streaming down your cheeks.

Now, that you calmed down a bit and your head cleared, you laid in your bed, looking at the ceiling, face blank of any emotion. You got pulled back into reality by your phone vibrating. You sat up and moved the phone closer to your face. It was Peter.

You had 6 missed calls and 26 unread messages from the curly-haired boy. But you decided to ignore them and turned on the airplane mode. You curled up into a ball and snuggled up into your fluffy blanket. It was going to get better, you will get better, the pain will subdue, the anger will not.

You were so damn angry at him. How could he do this to you, string you along when he doesn’t want you in his life anymore? Letting a few tears slip, you let your eyelids droop and let your mind wander into the darkness of sleep.

----

“I don’t understand, what does she mean by a new best friend? What does she mean by not want her in my life anymore?” Peter asked as he paced around his room, with your note crumpled up in his right hand.

“I think you did the opposite of what you wanted to do you know?” MJ interrupted him and he looked at her horrified.

“This is all my fault, I’m the reason she feels like this,” he mumbled and continued pacing in circles.

“Remind me why you wanted to do this again?” MJ scoffed and Peter stopped to think.

“To make her jealous,” he mumbled and MJ stood up and hit him across the forehead with a rolled-up engineering magazine she found randomly thrown under his pillow.

“You are so stupid, Peter. And I can’t believe I helped you. But at least I got the cute girl’s number,” she mumbled the last part and Peter ran his shaky fingers through his hair.

“I fucked up,” he announced and MJ glared at him.

“Yeah, no shit genius. Remind me how this started again. In detail and soak in just how stupid you are,” she growled out and he got lost in the painful memory.

----

It was around 3 weeks after his best friend left for Europe, he was mindlessly scrolling through Instagram when he saw a photo she posted just 4 hours ago. He went to like it but his thumb froze before he could double-tap. It was a photo of her smiling, looking as beautiful as ever, on a beach with a sunset behind her. But it wasn’t her that made him freeze, it was the boy that was standing behind her with his arms wrapped around her waist. She was grinning at him, her smile shining brighter than all of the stars in the night sky.

“Who the fuck are you?” Peter mumbled to himself as he looked over more of the photos in the post. As he scrolled, the pair of them only grew closer on the pictures. Them sharing a meal, them in the sea, them on a carnival with a huge green teddy bear in her arms. Just from the last picture, it was clear that the boy won the plushie in one of those shitty scam carnival games Peter couldn’t play even if he really wanted to.

But what really got him, was the post from her private Instagram, the boy from the previous photos was kissing her on the corner of her mouth. Tears gathered up in his eyes as he exited the app and ran his shaky fingers through his hair.

‘Could she have a boyfriend? But she didn’t tell me,’ his breathing got quicker and he had a sudden urge to puke. Before he could stop himself, he opened his contacts app and scrolled to find MJ’s phone number, she could help him.

“Hey, I know this is a lot to ask but I need you to help me make my best friend jealous.” Those words came from his mouth before he could even think about them.

----

“I told you before you started with this stupid plan of yours that it won’t work out,” MJ snapped him out of his mind. Peter stared into the distance before he snapped out of it.

“I need to go and see her, I need to explain,” Peter rushed out before MJ stopped him.

“You need to give her some time, she wouldn’t want to see you, and only get angry or even more upset.” She explained and Peter nodded in understatement.

“You are right, I will let her cool off for a week, and then talk to her,” Peter concluded. MJ blinked in surprise.

“Are you sure you want to give her a week? I was thinking more like 2 days, not 7,” MJ said cautiously and Peter huffed out angrily.

“God, why are you so cryptic, why can’t you just tell me and help,”

“Because this is your relationship, that is on line, not mine. And you want me to solve this for you,” MJ raised her voice and Peter rolled his eyes.

“God, this is useless” he mumbled and the girl in front of him scoffed.

“I can just leave if that’s what you want,” She stood up to leave but Peter grabbed her forearm gently.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that. I’m just really anxious and I want to see her. But you are right, I shouldn’t leave her without explanation for such a long period of time,” Peter apologized and MJ nodded.

“I need to go, mum wants to watch this new movie she saw in Target, I’ll text you okay?”

“Okay bye, enjoy the movie,” Peter mumbled and MJ walked out of his room.

“Great Parker, just great,” he mumbled to himself as he watched her leave through his window.

----

2 days later

Peter was standing in front of your school, waiting for you to finish. The last two days have been torture for him and he couldn’t wait to talk to you. When he heard the bell ring on the inside of the building, he stood up from the bench he was sitting on and moved closer to the main entrance, just a precaution and so he wouldn’t miss you walking out.

He started to get worried when he didn’t see you walk out even after 15 minutes.

‘Maybe they had some science lab and are cleaning up or something he thought to himself to calm down a bit. Then, he saw one of your friends, Bee, walk out and he waved at them.

“Hey, she isn’t here today,” Bee said to Peter. He only frowned. That’s weird.

“Okay, thanks Bee, do you think she could be at home? Is she sick?” Peter asked and Bee frowned at him.

“I thought you were best friends, you don’t know where she is?” Bee asked him and Peter looked down looking very guilty.

“We had a fight,” he mumbled and Bee scoffed.

“Well, I guess you fucked up pretty bad because she never misses school.”

“I know, I fucked up and I hurt her, but I just want to make it better, I gave her time to cool off and now, I need to apologize,” Peter explained and Bee nodded their head.

“Okay Parker, last chance, if you hurt her to this extent ever again, I’ll kick you in the balls.” Bee threatened and Peter nodded.

“Don’t worry, this is the first and last time this has ever happened, won’t hurt her ever again, I promise,” Peter said and Bee could tell his words were genuine.

“Fine Parker go, and if she is not at school tomorrow, you are a dead man, I’m telling you that right now.”

“Don’t worry Bee, I’m going to make this right,” Peter promised as he walked away from your school.

----

“Honey, someone is here to see you,” Your mom called out and you looked from under your blanket. You couldn’t function correctly for the past few days, the loss of your best friend being too much to bear.

“Tell them to go away please,” you mumbled and she shook her head sadly. You stopped crying a while ago, no tears left in your body.

You heard a gentle knock on your door.

“Hey bug,” You whipped your head towards the voice, and the tears you thought ran out, welled up in your eyes. He was there, even after he exchanged you for someone else.

“Pete,” you whispered and he quickly walked towards you and sat on your bed. You threw yourself into his arms but then quickly pulled back and furrowed your eyebrows.

“What are you doing here?” you asked and Peter shook his head.

“I came to apologize, I hurt you by my actions and made you think something, that isn’t true at all,” he explained and you tilted your head, reminding Peter of a cute, confused puppy.

“I will just tell you the truth, and hope you will be able to forgive me.”

“I was jealous. It’s simple as that, and now that I’ve said it out loud, it sounds so stupid.” He took a deep breath and slowly tangled his fingers in yours.

“The truth is, I have feelings for you. You know what? Scratch that, I’m in love with you and have been for a long time. When I saw you with the guy in Europe, being all cute and sweet together, I just lost it.” He confessed and looked up to see your face. You had an unreadable expression on your face.

“Fuck, he even got you a huge teddy bear from the carnival scam games, I could never do that for you, and I know you love that corny stuff.” He said with a shaky voice and could feel the tears push into his eyes.

“I wanted to make you jealous, but I hurt you instead and that hurts me even more than seeing you with that boy.” He said and then kneeled on the floor beside your bed. He took your other hand into his and kissed your knuckles gently.

“I’m so sorry Bug, please forgive me,” he begged as he put his forehead against your hand. The tears that gathered in his eyes flowed freely down his perfect face and it hurt you to see him like this. You took your hand away from his and you could see the quick flash of pain on his face. You caught one tear with your finger and whispered.

“Please don’t cry, I’m going to cry too,” he quickly looked up and smiled sadly, when he saw your sunken and tired face.

“I forgive you, Peter.” You said with a crack in your voice.

“And you know, it actually worked out, I was so jealous when I saw you with her.” You confessed.

“I love you too Peter, I always have” you whispered and Peter’s face lit up with joy.

“You, do?” He asked and you nodded with a slight smile on your face.

“I do, so so much,” You caressed his cheek, shuffled closer to him, and kissed him on the forehead.

“Come here and lay with me,” you demanded and Peter chuckled.

“Well, what my lovebug wants, she gets.” Peter teased and you hid your face in the blanket.

“I kinda like it,” you whispered shyly and Peter laughed lightly.

“Scoot over love, let me lay with you.” You shuffled over and Peter slipped under your blanket. He laid down and slowly maneuvered your body, to lay comfortably on his chest.

“We’ll talk more tomorrow, we’ll work it out, I promise.” You mumbled and Peter nodded and kissed the top of your head.

“I love you, Peter”

“I love you my Bug,” It was quiet for a bit before Peter spoke once again.

“So, who was the boy in the photos?”

“PETER!”

-----

I'm sorry I kind of disappeared for two months, but I had an extreme case of writer's block, but I am back. But I still have no ideas so if you have any ideas, I would be forever thankful if you pitched them to me.

I would also like to thank you for 97 followers, it's unbelievable.

I would really appreciate it if you gave me some feedback and told me what I can change.

Thanks for reading

- Faye xxx

[hanniiesuckle17]

Stray Kids Reaction: S/o Having A Big Baby Bump

A/n: this is such a cute request! I hope this is what you wanted! I wanted to try something a lil different since it's more of a reaction than a scenario🥰❤❤❤❤❤

Requested by: @unvrsecosmoss 

Chan:

HAPPY BOI

the second your belly gets big he gets so excited 

like bouncing up and down off the walls excited

“Chris calm down”

“BUT LOOK ITS SO CUTE OUR LITTLOE BOY OR HGIRL IS IN THERE ASLAFJDSFMDVLSOJFW”

“How do you even speak like that?”

like his inner dad immediately comes out

he probably starts reading and memorizing more parenting books

you woke up like a month before the due date and Chris had literally swaddled you

.......in a blanket.....

like a baby

granted....it was the best night sleep you had in a while but...still

overall he is just so excited to become a dad when he sees your big baby bump

although the boys are very done with him giving them pureed food during lunch breaks

this man is so ready to be a father

he loves you baby bump so much

he really likes to sleep behind you so he can have a hand on your stomach so in the middle of the night he can feel his son or daughter kick

Minho:

probably wakes up one morning and is like:

“.......your stomach is huge.....”

“Yeah its been like that for a couple months.”

the cats have most definitely sat ontop of your belly 

he finds it so cute

he took like a billion pictures of it

ngl though he is super obsessed with your belly

like he loves watching you cook and coming up and putting his hands on your belly

if you ask him nicely he might even give you a back rub but only if you let the cats sit on your belly again

minho has been pretty chill throughout the entire pregnancy

even when you had all those weird cravings he will wait until you walk out of the room to gag at the combination of food you are eating

“Y/n stay still!!!”

“Minho this cat is digging its nails into your future daughter!”

“.............the cats name is Soongi.”

“Geez. Sorry.”

“Now hold still. Daddy wants a picture of his baby and his baby mama”

Changbin:

THIS MAN

THE HAPPIEST MAN ON THE PLANETTT

the second

no

the MILLISECOND this man notices your baby bump gets bigger he is all over your tummy

this man will not stop touching you

he loves seeing how big your bump is

when he is bored he likes to take your eyeliner and draw a face on your belly

he calls it Mr.Bumpy

they talk about future plans for your baby and ngl.....its pretty cute

“Mr.Bumpy should we paint the nursery yellow or white?”

“You’re right Mr. Bumpy. That’s exactly what I thought. 

“Binnie you’ve been talking to my belly for like an hour and I’m hungry.”

 but he loves your belly 

he thinks you look super cute the bigger you belly gets

until he accidentally pisses you off during one of your mood swings

then you are scarier the grim reaper himself

“SEO LEWIS CHANGBIN YOU GET YOUR BUTT BACK HERE!” 

“I didn’t mean to !!!1 I’m sorry babbyyyyyy!”

Hyunjin:

This man is so 

WHIPPED

like he was whipped for you before you got pregnant but like now that your baby bump is getting bigger is more whipped than you thought possible

(y’all hyunjin be simpin)

but like for real

you ask this man to do anything and I mean anything and he will do it

“HYunjin!!!”

“what? yes? are you okay? what can I do? should I run to the store? Ill get pizza on the way back! or noodles? I don’t know. what about pickles! You liked those yesterday!” 

“.....can you get the tea kettle down for me?”

“oh....yeah of course baby!”

literally will do anything you ask him 

he just loves seeing you with your big baby bump

“hyunjin will you do aegyo for me? pretty please?????”

“........no......”

*points to baby bump*

aegyo storm for the next two hours just to make you smile

literally loves taking pictures with you and your big bump and always brags about it when he shows someone his lock screen

Jisung:

like hyunjin he is WHIPPED

will let you literally do anything to him

he doesn't do skincare but like you made him to a whole 14 step routine one day and he sat through the whole gosh darn thing because he loved seeing you with you big bump

the second you tummy gets really big he starts talking to his son or daughter

its the cutest thing

you swear that the baby kicks every time they hear his voice

“baby can I braid your hair?”

“.........can I talk to the baby.....”

“sure!”

“YES!” *fist pumps*

is definitely the type that is you have a big bump around Halloween to convince you to wear a baby bump related couple costume if you are going to a party or something

needless to say to the skz Halloween party you went as mike and sully with your belly being mike

he was very happy

“Ji! People keep looking at my tummy!”

“I KNOW ITS SO CUTE I CANT FUNCTION!”

he also probably has minor freakouts because your numb getting bigger means one day closer to him being a father so pre parental panic attacks come more often

Felix:

this weirdo

is obsessed with your big tummy in the weirdest way

but also like low-key the sweetest

when you are sitting next to each other on the couch he uses your belly as like a second table 

he has also used your belly as a pillow sometimes (with your permission ofc)

again another man that is available for your every need\

Felix is the king of helping you roll out of bed because you balance is thrown off

also he makes these incredible meals out of your weird cravings (we know he has been quite the little chef and baker recently)

“Felix omg how did you turn pickles, hot sauce, and peanut butter into this?”

“I have no clue myself. I think I blacked out and Gordon Ramsay took over”

also one of the ones who likes talking to your baby bump

he is constantly having his hand on your belly

“Felix you have to go to rehearsal”

“BUT WHAT IF IT  K I C K S ?????//?”

he just loves looking and touching your big bump it makes him smile feeling his little boy or girl 

(probably also a huge advocate for baby bump Halloween costumes)

Seungmin:

the MOST CARING BOI  E V E R

seeing your big baby bump makes his caring side come out 

“baby are you using the cream the doctor gave us?” 

“yes seungmin”

“what about the vitamins”

“yes seungmin”

“does this shirt match my jacket”

“yes seungmin”

*pushing him out the door so he can get to practice only three hours later than he was supposed to*

you can pretty much guilt him into doing anything you want by just pointing to your belly and reminding him he got you into this situation for nine months.

“you wanna watch a movie and do face masks with me?”

“eh not really”

*points to stomach* “baby bump.”

“clay or sheet?”

but while he doesn't say that he loves your bump he really likes seeing it

especially when you are just kind of lounging around the house in sweats and a baggy t-shirt that is not as baggy as it used to be

seungmin also really loves when you hold hands with him and the rest your hands on your tummy

Jeongin:

can someone tell me the full link to this video omg too cute ^^

this poor baby

seeing your big tummy just like a constant lovely reminder that he will be a father in a couple of months

he loves how cute you look with your big tummy

but eventually it leads him to a freakout

“y/n we haven't painted a nursery yet!!!”

“jeongin....honey we have two months left. its okay”

“y/n I don’t know how to change a diaper”

“innie you don’t have to-......yeah you should get on that baby”

*runs to watch 8347697 videos on how to change a diaper and falls through a yt baby funnel*

the minute your baby bump starts to show he goes into overdrive

he started packing your hospital bags when you were 4 months in

“innie I don't need......a.....what is this??”

“its a pregnancy pillow.”

“innie its bigger than me how are you fitting it in the bag”

but he loves your bump

probably another boy who finds the bump costumes cute but its most likely your idea

he most definitely has asked chan on how to father lessons 

seungmin probably also gave him one of those parenting for dummies books but he actually read it at night before he sleeps (omg too cute)

Requests are open my lovelies!

Masterlist

[writtenbynightlock]

heeeey, can i request scenario where miya twins(separate) bokuto and hinata ( i can feel this ✨chaotic✨ energy). They are about to take shower with their s/o, horny and needy but it turns out that s/o l o v e hella hot water and boys like “wtf what’s wrong with u girl” but u know still fluff and cute👉🏻👈🏻🥺 sorry if there was some mistakes, english isn’t my first language. anyway if u not comfortable with this request i wish u have a good start of the year💖

Hot Shower with S/O

Warning(s): suggestive themes, post! time-skip spoilers

Ft. Bokuto Koutaro, Hinata Shoyo & Miya Twins

Note: Requests are open 💌

A/N: Your English is great! Keep up the good work and thank you for the request <3 have a good start of the year also :D so sorry for the delay >.<

Masterlist | Rules

》 Bokuto Koutaro

The sunlight made your dim curtains glow. Sleeping peacefully in bed was you and Bokuto. It was still quite early in the morning but Bokuto is an early riser.

As he opens his eyes, he smiles when he saw your sleeping figure, lips parted as you breath in and out.

You were sleeping in your silky nightgown, the straps falling to your arms — revealing a bit of your breasts. Bokuto’s eyes widen at the sight but he can’t help but feel giddy to see such a beautiful and sexy woman sleeping beside him.

Even though you and Bokuto shared a good amount of intimate moments, he was still shy whenever some of your intimate parts were showing, making Bokuto immediately cover his eyes, blushing madly. He peeked a little and decided to gently return the strap to its rightful place, not wanting for him to see freely without your consent.

At first he sigh in relief, but he suddenly felt a bit fuzzy. The sight of your breasts was enough to make him feel aroused — making him as awake as ever. It was one of those moments when he craves your touch and attention. He didn’t want to wake you up just to satisfy his needs. He didn’t want to be selfish.

Bokuto didn’t know how long he was admiring your face, trying to distract himself from those lewd thoughts but his eyes widened when he saw your eyes suddenly looking straight into his, heart thumping in his chest just like the first time he saw you.

“Good morning, Bo” you greeted with a sleepy smile, rubbing your eyes.

“Good morning my sugarplum!” Bo says with a big smile on his face, quickly pulling you into him as he gives you multiple kisses on your face, making you giggle.

“Looks like you had a good night’s sleep”

You say, running your fingers through his hair that just makes Bokuto melt, puppy dog eyes instantly at the touch.

“Let’s take a shower!”

“Okay-”

You squealed as Bokuto suddenly lifts you up from the bed and carries your bridal style to the bathroom.

“You have quite the energy this morning, Bo.”

Your innocence just made him stir up even more. Oh how he wanted to get a taste of you right there.

“(Y/n)-chan. Can I ask for kisses? I have a problem” says Bokuto shyly, looking away from you with his cheeks tinted red at the request. You raised your eyebrows to what he meant by problem. As you looked down, you finally get it. You cup his cheek and caressed it with your thumb.

“Now what got you so hard early in the morning, Bo?”

“You just look so dang sexy in that nightgown.”

You could melt right there. Bokuto was being so respectful towards you as he kept closing his eyes, fighting the urge to look at your beautiful breasts. Not wanting to strain him from his needs any further, you strip off your clothes.

“Open your eyes, Bo. I’m all yours.”

From his hair being droopy to instantly back alive, Bokuto smiles and immediately stripped, instantly pulling your body onto his, kissing you passionately and moaned at the feeling of your soft breasts against his chest.

“Turn on the water baby. We’re supposed to be showering.”

You say with a giggle. Bokuto didn’t listen as he wrapped his arms around you and kept kissing you all over your face, your neck and jaw. Reaching for the knob, hot water started to shower, hitting you and Bokuto but the ace was startled, instantly jumping from his spot.

“Baby- ow!”

Your eyes widened as you saw Bokuto on the ground — he slipped. Bokuto looks at you with puppy dog eyes, pouting like a baby.

“Bo! Are you okay?”

“What the heck? Why did you turn it on?”

“You know how much I love hot water when I shower.”

A smirk then appeared on Bokuto’s face that sent shivers down your spine as Bokuto then caged you between him and the tile wall.

“Why don’t we heat things up more then?”

》 Miya Atsumu

It was one of those rare moments when you were the last one to arrive in your shared apartment with Atsumu.

“‘Tsumu?” you call for your fiancé, observing that the living room and kitchen was empty. Not hearing a response, you then went to you your shared bedroom but he wasn’t there. Hearing the sound of the shower running, it indicated that he just got home a few minutes earlier than you.

Opening the bathroom door, you could see Atsumu rinsing his hair. Hearing you enter, he turned around and beamed as he saw you.

“Welcome home, babe! Like what you see?” says Atsumu with a smug smile as he leans his arm on the wall and the other on his hips, empahasizing his naked figure. You roll your eyes at his childishness but you couldn’t help but laugh.

“What am I seeing?”

“Total hotness.”

“Really? I didn’t notice.”

From a smile to a frown, Atsumu gave you one of the most hurt expressions he could muster, crushing his ego.

“I’m so hurt by that babe.”

“I’m just kidding. You know I love you, ‘Tsumu.”

“Show me how much you love me then”

Atsumu remains silent as he stares at you, something dark encircling his orbs. You raised your eyebrows as he gazes at you from head to toe, checking you out in your office clothes, your tight knee length skirt that empahsizes your curves and how you purposefully let three of the buttons unbuttoned. You teased Atsumu, noticing how he has been texting you some dirty hints for the past few days. Stripping off your clothes, you then joined him inside the shower, smirking to how Atsumu kept his gaze on you, gulping to see you with no clothes on.

Atsumu leans down to your face, a smirk appearing.

“How was work baby?”

“Oh you know same old. How about you? Training must be exhausting, huh?”

You say with a smile as you felt butterflies in your stomach as Atsumu brushes his lips on yours. Your eyes widen and let out a squeak when he suddenly pulls you close and cups your butt, hands gripping on his shoulders for support.

“Oh believe me, I’m exhausted. All it takes for me to recover is some kisses.”

“I’m not that easy.”

“Oh please. You even said yes to my proposal.”

Flashbacks of Atsumu proposing to you to marry him was one of the happiest moments in your life. It still gave you butterflies to your stomach thinking about it like it was only yesterday.

Before you even get to reply, Atsumu smashes his lips onto yours, hungry for your lips. You moaned as his tongue slips in to your mouth, making Atsumu grip onto your ass even more. It was quite funny to see your fiancé desperate for you even though you two dated for a real while now. It’s like the first time you two kiss. An idea popped into your head, wanting to tease Atsumu.

“Yer so hot, (Y/N). I can’t get enough of ya.”

“Thanks babe.”

As you tilted your head to give him more room to kiss on your neck, you reached for the heater as the shower running, transitioning the temperature of the water from cold to hot hot — making Atsumu yelp and panickly turn off the shower before facing you.

“What the hell is wrong with ya?! I thought this was supposed to be sexy time!”

You laughed loudly as Atsumu’s face was beet red.

“Yer lucky yer so cute.”

》 Hinata Shoyo

Hinata Shoyo came from practice and just wanted to soak into the bathtub — wanting to relax.

“(Y/n)-chan? I’m home!”

Heading towards the door, you greeted Hinata with a kiss on the cheeks before taking of his MSBY jacket and placing it in the laundry basket for you to take care of it later.

“You look tired, sunshine. You want to take a bath?”

Hinata’s heart flutters as you addressed him by his nickname you gave for him ever since you two started dating. He loved how you call him, noticing the loving tone you put in.

“I really do. I’ll go prepare the tub now!”

Before you could even reply, Hinata hurriedly went to the bathroom, closing the door behind him. He somehow felt a bit weird and he could feel his pants tightening. The wing spiker started to freak out, his face red. Wanting to get those thoughts off, he quickly took off his clothes and started to fill the tub with lukewarm water and pouring his favourite bath bomb that you introduced him to. He loves how the bath bomb makes your skin smell so good and milky smooth-

“Aahhh!”

From the kitchen, you stopped what you were doing as you heard Hinata’s scream. Alarmed, you quickly knocked on the bathroom door.

“Shoyo?! Are you okay?”

“(Y/n)-chan!”

“I’m coming in, okay?”

As you enter the bathroom, you saw Hinata already in the tub, the water still midway his hips but what caught your attention was his member making itself known, making your eyes widen.

“(Y/n)-kun! Don’t-”

“You need help with that, baby?”

Now you’ve done it. Hinata was more needy now. Hinata has been wanting to do you but he was shy to do so until the day finally came where he reached his limits.

“N-no! You don’t have-”

Hinata was in a stuttering mess as you start to strip off your clothes.

“You could’ve just asked, Shoyo. I don’t mind at all.”

You say with smile as you joined him in the tub, sitting on his lap and wrap your arms around neck.

“I-I want you, (Y/n)-chan!”

You let out a chuckle before you placed your lips onto his, Hinata instantly wrapping his arms around your waist, pulling you closer. You two had quite a make out session. Without knowing where your hands were going, you accidentally turned on the shower.

“Ack! (Y/N)-chan! Why did you turn on the shower?”

The poor baby rested his face on your chest as you immediately turned off the shower. The hot water didn’t startled you as you loved and preffered that temperature to shower in but Hinata was more into cold showers.

“I’m so sorry, Shoyo! I didn’t mean to.”

“Take care of me please.”

》 Miya Osamu

You and Osamu were just hanging on the couch of your shared apartment, watching Osamu’s favourite cooking show.

“Gosh. You really don’t want to make Gordon Ramsay angry.”

Osamu hummed as placed multiple kisses on the side of your head, his muscular arms around your waist and legs tangled to yours.

It was just a lazy saturday night — with the two of you finishing 15 episodes in one sitting after eating dinner. As you lay into your boyfriend’s chest, you noticed how Osamu has been running his hand up and down your back and from time to time, he nimbled on your ear — a spot where he knows very well that you were vulnerable to, making you moan quietly. You gave into his touch and nuzzled your head further into his neck.

“‘Samu~”

“Yea baby?”

“‘Samu, I have to take a shower. It’s super late at night.”

“Can I come with?”

“It ain’t bad for the water bill so why not?”

You say with a giggle before getting up — Osamu’s eyes lingering on your fading figure, him getting a bit more needy than usual. He craved for your touch. He wanted love from you after being so busy managing Onigiri Miya.

Arriving in the bathroom, you were about to take off your clothes when Osamu caged you in between his arms, holding the sink. Your back was facing him so you look straight in the mirros with an amused smile on your face, seeing how your boyfriend nuzzled his face into your neck, shivering at his touch as you felt his warm lips and hot breath on your skin.

“Oh? Someone’s needy today.”

You say teasingly and brought a hand up to cup his cheek and lean your head back onto his shoulder, enjoying his kisses.

“I couldn’t stop thinking about ya all day.”

Smiling, you turned around and wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him into a passionate kiss. Osamu moans as he finally got a taste of your sweet lips, his arms immediately wrapping around your bum to help you sit down on the bathroom sink. You automotive wrapped your legs around Osamu’s waist, pulling him closer which made him groan even louder.

You pulled away, butterflies in your stomach and lips swollen from the kiss. You smirk as Osamu’s eyes were furrowed, not yet contented with the contact.

“You’re getting loud, ‘Samu. The neighbors might hear.”

“Yer such a tease. Why don’t we turn on the shower then?”

You raised your arms up, gesturing for Osamu to strip you. With a smirk, Osamu takes of your shirt while you take off your shorts. It was your turn to strip Osamu from his clothes. Your eyes were blessed to see his muscular build, your boyfriend smiling proudly the way you gawked at his body — boosting his confidence.

Stepping into the shower, Osamu turned on the water heater to neutral before pinning you against the wall, finally be able to make love to you. The cold tile wall against your back makes you shiver, Osamu taking this as an advantage to find your weak spots on your neck, you biting back a moan.

“Yer so beautiful, darlin’.”

Your fingers got lost in his hair, suddenly gripping it as he hits the spot on your neck, making him more turned on.

“Hop on a count of 3. One... two... three.”

As you hopped, Osamu securely catches you, your face now level witn his. Wrapping your legs around his waist and your hands on his neck, you two shared another passionate kiss — lips moving in sync with love and lust. You wanted this intimate moment to be more steamy, making you set the heater into hot mode, the hot water making contact with Osamu’s back, making him shout and jump from his spot.

“What the fuck?! It hurts! Did you do that, baby?”

“Sorry. It just got a little bit cold. Plus, i wanted this moment to be steamy if you know what i mean” you say with an exaggerated wink.

Osamu blinks at you for a moment before letting out a laugh, throwing his head back to how cute you were. Smiling, Osamu sets you down and hugs you, kissing your forehead.

“Damn i love you.”

“I love you too, my lil’ onigiri. Now shut up and kiss me.”

[sashi-ya]

{+18} - Law x Fem Best Friend ♥ CH.3

♥ Daily living with the Heart pirates crew AU  ♥Spoilers after Dressrosa Arc. Law´s backstory.  ♥Female reader. Little physical description. Everybody is 18+, canon ages.  ♥TW: Heavy NSFW. Unprotected sex – this is just fiction, don’t forget to take care of you and your partners while having sex! . A bit of toxic behavior from Law. Drama (a bit much). No further warnings. If you think I should include some feel free to tell me ♥Thank you for the likes and follows, I appreciate it them so so much! If you wanna know when I’ll be updating the next chapters, you can follow me on Twitter @LawIsMyWaifu, come interact I love to have mutuals that love Law and One Piece as much as I do 

Word count: 3.1K

» List of parts: {CH1}  {CH2}  {CH3}  {CH4} {CH5} «

Chapter 3 

Little moans escaped my mouth, as he pinched and twisted, softly, the most sensitive parts of my breasts.  “Can I show you something?” he asked, now looking at me with lasciviousness. “Uhum”, I moaned, desperate to know what he was going to do. He then slipped a little sexy laugh and said “ROOM” and quickly the circle of power was surrounding us. I’ve always told him that inside of it my senses enhanced, this time wasn’t the exception. He then expressed “counter shock”. I lost my breath, because I knew how deadly that attack was, but instead, a soft electricity ran through his fingers through my nipple, making me squirm.

Every little shock my skin experienced, was slowly sending me to heaven. Pangs travelling directly to my core every time I heard his seductive laugh. He was enjoying this; he certainly knew what he was doing. 

Law then crawled over me, placing his tattooed, well defined, tanned arms at each side of my face, kissed me and ordered me “stand up”, with a lustful smile.  

And without questioning, I did as he told. I stood up in front of him, who also stood up and told me to wait right there. He reached his katana, looking at me with almost a wicked look. “I hope you don’t get cold”, he said and unsheathed the Kikoku. Widening my eyes, I heard him express “Scan” followed by a movement of his hand that took all my clothes, even my underwear, right away. 

I was left completely naked in front of him. My cheeks turned to red, and I wasn’t able to move. He approached me while slowly taking his shirt off, exposing the perfect anatomy of his torso. I traveled with my eyes every single black line of his tattoos, the way they garnished his skin, his abs, the little scars that remained from fighting at Dressrosa. Oh, so tempting, so enticing. I was so needy for him. I wanted to get railed by this man, real hard. 

Law licked his lips subtly, while looking me up and down, when suddenly violently grabbed my neck with his right hand. He was not choking me, nor caressing my skin. He applied just the perfect pressure to the sides of my neck and with his knee roughly separated my legs. 

The skilled fingers of his free hand reached my sex. “You are already so wet, Y/n-ya”, he said, discovering how aroused I was. “I want to get you even more wet”, he whispered next to my ear.  I could only say his name in between gasping breaths. I couldn’t focus on more than primal desire.

He began to move his fingers in circular motions over my clit, and slowly introduced his thumb on me. In and out.. In and out... and with every moan I let out, he increased the pressure on my neck. 

The surgeon let go of me, knelt and started kissing my stomach softly, downwards, arriving at my thighs, kissing and biting the inside of them. I stretched my head back and instinctively grabbed his hair. Law loudly growled and placed his mouth over my sex, licking up and down, tracing also circles, enjoying my flavor, as he said, “you taste delicious”. My legs started to get weaker. I was groaning, heavily breathing, until I let myself go, when he made me reach the peak of my pleasure. 

“Now, let me show you how skilled I am with my mouth, too”, I said, slowly putting my hands onto his hips and pulling him to me so we could be facing each other more closely, Slowly kissing first the commissure of his lips, and then placing a kiss onto his lips. I noticed he was breathing more heavily and when my stomach met his I could feel his erection against my lady parts. I pushed him into a big wooden couch. I hopped onto his lap. Being over his lap made me feel his sex pressed, rubbing against mine while I started moving with an exquisite motion. We kept kissing, touching, feeling our flesh spellbound from his scent, that now has turned into the mix of his sweet perfume with hints of sweat. 

Kissing first his neck and then leaving a trace downwards, his collar bones, lower… lower. I stood up and kneel at his feet. 

I took a long time to enjoy his well-defined abs going lower till getting to his navel. My ears were blessed with his low moanings, the little spasms that his muscles did every time I came closer to his skin with my mouth and how he got his head thrown back. I followed the happy trail of little hairs that took me to his pelvis, perfectly determined by the V shape his lower abs formed.

I stopped as he bended down, placed a kiss on my forehead and then onto my mouth, I gave him another in return and put my head down. It was time for me to show him my oral skills were serious shit. I was delighted with how he groaned and came arching his hole lower back from the pleasure my mouth has given to him. 

Outside the blizzard was still intense, as I could see through the window, after Law not letting me rest a bit was behind me pushing me against the wooden wall. My cheek was pressed on the cold glass of the window, that slowly fogged with the steaming heat of my skin. 

Law grabbed my chin, passing his arm from behind brushing his thumb softly over my lips. I opened my mouth softly, receiving his finger into my mouth, slowly sucking it. 

I could feel his hard rock bulge against my ass, so I reached for it, passing my hand back. “Fuck me, Law”, I said begging to be filled with his member. “That’s what I’ve been waiting to do for so long, Y/N-ya”, he moaned. 

He rubbed his manhood, first over my buttocks, then in between and finally over my vagina, softly lubricating it with the fluids of my arousal. 

My "best friend" inserted his dick inside of me, softly, slowly, but not completely… it felt like a sweet torture and I, begging said, "just fuck me already, please, I want you".  I sounded - and I was - desperate to feel the sensation of his hard sex fully invading my insides. He laughed, with a side smile, that I could not see, but that I felt on the skin of my back, because he was pressing his face against it. And with a big thrust stretched completely my walls. 

He moved his hips in a certain way, not so violently but firmly, in and out. ” Mh.”... I didn't want to be loud, because hearing his accelerated breath, his groans, was heavenly.  “Faster, faster please”, I asked him to increase the rhythm of the pounding. He did. Beads of sweat covered both of our bodies while we got there. I finished followed by Law, who filled me up with all of his love juice.  The sensation of being full of his fluids inside of me was delectable, I even remained still just to feel it flow and drip from my insides into my thighs. 

Both were sweaty, exhausted but drunks from each other, so we moved to bed. And after some more hours of letting ourselves indulge in the pleasure of lust, our bodies fall into exhaustion… The storm was not near to be over, outside the blizzard was still violent, and the strong winds have destroyed some of the pines of the forest. Law put his left arm around me, bringing me close to his chest and I placed my head on it, as well as my hand over his abs. He kissed my forehead and we both went to sleep… 

A patch of sunlight hit my eyes. Lying next to me, Law was still asleep. I stood up slowly, trying not to wake him up because I know how exhausted he gets when uses his ope ope no mi. And he certainly did waste a lot of energy all night long with the little shocks of his “counter shock” and maintaining the “room” active, just for me, to feel even more intense every little sensation. 

The logs of the fireplace were no longer burning, so I got a little cold. I saw Law’s shirt on the floor, picked it up and put it on. It was long enough to cover half of my thighs. I was spellbound from his ambrosial scent. 

My stomach was growling as the hunger took over, when suddenly I heard someone knocking on the door of the cabin. Outside was sister Alley, a few children and Gerald with a big basket. Quickly I grabbed my jeans and opened the door slightly. “Doctor Y/N!!” shouted one of the girls trying to force the door to be completely open and peeking through it. “Where is the tattooed doctor?!! I wanna see him!! the other kid asked, almost shouting. Gerald told them to be quiet and handed me the basket with a look of complicity. I thanked them and they came back to the main building. 

Inside the basket there was a bunch of food for us to have breakfast. I started laughing when I saw a big baguette, because I remembered how much Law hates bread… God knows why. 

While preparing some tea, I watched the man that sent me to heaven a few hours ago, peacefully sleep. I could have stayed there forever, just the two of us.  No worries, no responsibilities, no danger.

“Puru puru puru”. Rang my Den Den Mushi. “Gatcha. Y/n, where the hell are you both? it’s morning already! I’ve called you several times but somehow this thing won't connect”, reproached Penguin. “Shh stop yelling, Law is asleep. We were supposed to return yesterday, but the storm got worse than we thought. We will be there in a few hours. Enjoy the island a bit more until we get there”, I told my crew member. “You both slept in the same room again, Y/N? When are you going to announce the wedding? hahaha!”, Penguin mocked me. “It’s not what you think, don’t be stupid, she’s like my sister, we are done with the chatty. We’ll be there in a few hours, prepare to sail”, Law suddenly appeared from behind taking the speaker of the transponder off from my hand, reprehended his subordinate and hung up. 

“She is like my sister” ... those words hit me harder than expected. I’m not your sister… I’ve never… Oh lord… I shook off the thought and gave him a smile, followed by a “Good morning, I made you some tea”. “Thanks”, he expressed almost apathetic while brushing his hair with his fingers. “Can you give me my t-shirt back?”. My smile slowly disappeared. Why is he being so rude?, I thought, and a feeling of upset was installed in me. “Yeah, here, take it” I said, taking off the shirt and almost throwing it at him. I was naked, both of my breasts were exposed, I wasn’t ashamed anymore, I was mad. “Cover yourself, Y/n-ya.” He voiced and directed his gaze to the window. A few tears began to blur my vision, I felt used, I felt like I was nothing but a toy for him. 

I grabbed my clothes, put them on, and left the cabin slamming the door. Outside the sun was shining, the forest showed the aftermath of the blizzard, the level of the snow was considerably higher than yesterday and a cold, almost icy breeze played around with some sections of my hair. I started walking, I needed to be alone. 

“Y/n-ya where are you going?” I heard Law calling me from behind, but instead of turning back at him I kept on walking. “Y/n-ya!”. I decided to ignore him. I was so mad, so hurt I didn’t even know what to say to him.  

“Room… Shambles!” I heard and suddenly the log in front of me got changed for Law. “Where the hell are you going? the orphanage is the other way!” he said out of breath. “I’m not going there, I am not allowed to take a walk… “brother”?”, I articulated while a sting of sorrow hit my heart. 

“Stop it right there, Y/n-ya. What happened yesterday was nothing, ok? let’s forget about it.” he said, strongly. 

“Forget about it? Are you kidding me? You basically used me… I’m your best friend!... why did you....”, I suddenly stopped, I realized that despite him acting like this, I wanted that. I was guilty, too. He was my best friend… and what we did, probably will change our relationship, forever. 

Tears started flowing from my eyes. I wanted him to hug me, to comfort me, to wipe my eyes as he has always done. But this time, he didn’t. Instead he started walking away, turning his back to me. 

I stayed right there a few minutes, after falling into my knees on the cold snowy ground, while I saw him zooming off from my vision, expressing an inaudible, full of sorrow, “Law”. Holding the necklace with one of my hands, so hard it almost hurt my skin. 

Why does it hurt so much?, is it because he had wounded my pride? Or because I felt guilty?.... It's none of that.. All of a sudden it strikes me that I was in love with him. I’ve always been. And I repressed the feelings so many years convincing myself it was just fraternal love, for the sake of the relation and the crew. The shock produced by this whole situation made me realize I can’t restrain my feelings anymore…

I started walking back to the cabin, the cold breeze was almost crystallizing the tears over my cheeks. The icy wind, the immensity, the loneliness of the mountain scenery was the perfect metaphor for what I was feeling right now. I’ve always felt safe, protected knowing Law was at my side, but now… it’s probably over, I felt alone, for the very first time in ages. 

I could only hear the sound of the snow under my feet with every step I took mixed with me sobbing, thinking If I should leave the crew… Will I be able to handle loving him, yet treat him as a brother?, or even maybe just a crewmate? 

When I got to the cabin, Law was waiting outside, crestfallen and probably upset. I decided to ignore him and entered the place where a few hours away our bodies merged as one. Grabbed my bags with the sweaters I had bought yesterday and headed out. 

We walked to the orphanage, no talking, not even looking at each other. 

A few kids hugged me, and that type of pure love somehow warmed my heart a little bit. While Law was giving the nurses some more indications to follow for the treatment, Sister Alley noticed my red eyes and nose and asked, “You seemed so happy this morning, are you ok? Have you been crying?”. I couldn’t help but tell her -half of- the story. I trusted her, somehow she reminded me of the noon Law always remembers from Flevance. “Calm down, darling, give time to time. I’ve seen how he looks at you. Even if he says no, his eyes show different. I’m sure he feels the same way as you. Be calm and you will see”. Calm… ha, my favorite power from my devil fruit, I thought. 

I thanked her for the advice, hugged her and asked Gerald to take us to the city center   

During the whole ride I remained silent, choking back tears, and repeating the noon words over and over. “I’ve seen how he looks at you”, how does he look at me?... 

Law was calm as usual and exchanged a few words with our driver until we got to our destination. 

“Thank you so much doctors for all of your help, I hope to see you again someday. We will be happy to have you here in better conditions”. “Thanks for your hospitality, and send my regards to your wife, I hope she gets better!” I said, waving at him goodbye. 

We started walking downtown heading to where the Polar Tang and the rest of the crew was waiting for us. “Oi, Y/n-ya…”, my “best friend” said grabbing my wrist. 

I violently moved my arm for him to release me. I expressed coldly “Don’t worry, I’m not saying anything, forget about it”. 

Bepo was on the port waving at us, yelling our names. I don’t know why but I ran directly to him, hugged the big polar bear and sunk my head on his soft belly. “Aya aya, Y/N! you missed me I see. Well, have some garchu!. I missed you and captain too!”. 

We boarded the yellow submarine and I headed directly to my room. I jumped into bed and cried my eyes out. 

The day passed, and I didn’t get out of the room during the whole day. I excused myself, stating I was tired of the hard work we did with the sick children of the island. 

The night came and my stomach was growling from hunger. Yet, I didn’t want to face anyone, especially Law. But suddenly, someone knocked on my door. "Y/n-ya, you have to eat, open please I bought you some food". Said Law, from the other side of the door. “I don't want it, I’m not hungry”, I lied. “Don’t be such a whimsical baby, open the door.”, he ordered me. “I’m not opening, GO AWAY”, I expressed this time shouting, to which he replied, “I’m still your captain, open the door right now”. Bastard… I opened the door with the worst of the attitudes. He entered my room with a plate in his hands and sat on my bed. 

“Stop acting like this, Y/n-ya. You don’t see the problem? We’ve been like brothers and sisters for more than half of our lives. What happened yesterday shouldn't have happened. It's just… It’s not ok. You, you are my little sister…” He yelled at me with a cracking voice. “We are not siblings, Law. Sure, you are my family, but we are not brother and sister. Why don’t you see? We have no blood ties. We have kissed before, you even told me yesterday how much time you’ve been wanting to fuck me…” I made a pause, and even If I wouldn’t want to say it, my mouth didn’t hold back... “I love you, that’s it. I don’t know if I’ll be able to handle this, I LOVE YOU”.

Law gasped, widening his eyes. We looked at each other. His eyes said, “me too”, but his mouth expressed words that stuck into my heart as arrows… “I don’t love you, I wanted sex, ok? that's it. I was horny”.

A single teardrop fell from my eyes and while it ran through my cheek I said, “Law, I’m leaving the crew” ... 

Chapter 4

[angellesword]

SAVE ME | KTH (12)

Summary: You were determined to kill yourself, but what would happen when instead of ending your life, you ended up summoning the devil of death?

Alternatively:

The Devil: I’m here to ruin you, I’m here to save you.

Genre: Demon au, e2l, angst, fluff, roommate au

Pairing: Devil!Taehyung x Doctor!Reader

Word Count: 2.4k

Warnings: stabbing, blood, evil Taehyung is back, mention of pedophilia.

SERIES: CHAPTER 11 | CHAPTER 13

*****THIS IS UNEDITED. SORRY.

When Taehyung kissed you, he felt hot, drunk, and happy.

These feelings were the opposite of what you felt.

"Ugh," you pulled away from the kiss when you couldn't bear the taste of his mouth anymore.

You could literally feel the remnant of his blood on your own lips. It had a metallic taste and it was disgusting.

"Is something wrong?" Taehyung enquired, brows furrowed because of confusion.

He still felt like he was floating in the air. He had never felt something this strong before.

"N-Nothing," you answered, losing the courage to tell him that you hated the taste of blood.

You didn't want to offend him, didn't want him to think that you did not enjoy the kiss.

You did.

And that's what scared you the most.

Where did the two of you stand after this? What did this mean exactly? Did he kiss you because he liked you? Or did he do it just to give into one of his capital vices?

"Are you sure?" Taehyung blurted out, his voice was soft that it made your heart skip a beat.

Why did he have that look on his face? Why was he staring at you as if he wanted to crash his lips against yours again?

"Yeah," your eyes were roaming around, obviously avoiding his hot gaze. "It's getting late. We should head home,"

It was rude to walk away without waiting for his response. You knew this well. But what were you supposed to do when all that was clouding your mind was perplexity?

The ignorant part of you wanted to think that Taehyung was attracted to you, but the rational part of you was saying that only a fool would think that the devil was capable of liking someone.

Devil.

He was the devil and you shouldn't be fooled.

"Wait—" Taehyung ran after you, his hand immediately found its way to your wrist.

Taehyung swore he could feel the loud beat of your pulse.

"D-Did you not like it?" He whispered, voice so small you were certain he was either afraid or hurt.

"Didn't like what?" You were pretending as though you had no idea what he was talking about.

Taehyung's heart dropped. Judging your answer, he already knew what you felt.

"I was talking about the kiss," it was like he didn't get the hint that you didn't want to talk about it.

"It's fine if you hate it." The laugh he let out was breathy.

You tried to look at his face. He was already staring at you, his golden eyes screamed something you couldn't quite decipher.

"Just..." His grip on your wrist loosened, like he was ready to let you go, which was a clear juxtaposition of what he said after losing contact with your skin.

"Don't avoid me because of it." His smile was sad. "I don't want things to be awkward between us because of a mere peck on the lips."

And there was your answer.

"Right," you smirked before walking away, totally ignoring his groans as he told you to wait for him.

You were walking too fast, like you were doing exactly what he asked you not to do: avoid him.

Yes. You were planning on ignoring Taehyung. Actually, you were doing it now. You also did it yesterday and the day before that.

You were keeping track. Fourteen.

You had been avoiding the devil of death for straight two weeks now.

[4:23pm] you: I'm gonna be home late. Don't wait for me. Don't pick me up. I brought my car.

Even your text message felt like a dismissal. Taehyung frowned upon reading it. You were talking to him in a formal way. No smiley face or whatever.

He scoffed and tossed his phone onto the couch.

He didn't know if he had done something wrong for you to act like this. It was apparent that you didn't want to see him. You always brought him with you to the hospital, but ever since the kiss happened, you made sure to leave home at six in the morning and only be back at eleven in the evening.

There were also nights when you chose to sleep at the on-call room of Cornelia Hospital.

The devil didn't dare to bother you even though he missed you. This was because he was following the advice of PD-nim, his virtual assistant.

"Hey, PD-nim," Taehyung called after retrieving his phone. He needed advice again since it was obvious that giving you space wouldn't do the trick.

He just felt like you were growing more distant to him as day passed.

"What to do when someone is avoiding you?"

PD-nim responded in a heartbeat.

"You should give them space, Master V."

Taehyung clenched his jaw. PD-nim was full of shit. He knew how to address the devil with the nickname he set for himself, but the virtual assistant couldn't give proper solution to his master's problem.

"But it's not working!"

PD-nim took a few second to respond after that.

"Well," the assistant seemed hesitant. "Have you tried giving them flowers? Speaking of which, did you know that 64% percent of men buy flowers, while only 36% percent of women buy flowers for Valentine's Day—"

"PD-nim," Taehyung said through gritted teeth, making the assistant stop. "Can you shut the fuck up?"

"Okay," PD-nim's answer was instant again.

Taehyung sighed, as he gently stroked his chin.

"So flowers, huh?" He mumbled to himself.

Maybe he could try to give you red roses? Or tulips? Would you like daisies?

"PD-nim," Taehyung was decided. He would buy you some floras. "Where is the nearest flower shop from my apartment?"

There was no answer.

Taehyung facepalmed. He forgot how sensitive PD-nim was.

"Fine. You can speak again."

"Magic Flower Shop is four hundred meters away from your apartment,"

The devil switched off his phone and then he went his way to the shop PD-nim had suggested.

It wasn't so bad. The place was decorated mostly with pastel pink ornaments.

Taehyung roamed around the place. There were so many flowers that he didn't know what to pick. He was pondering whether to buy ready-made bouquet or to customize one. He had a lot of time to kill after all.

He didn't like staying in your apartment because loneliness was only consuming him.

"Sunflowers or lilies?" Taehyung licked his bottom lip, skimming his choices.

In the end, Taehyung decided to just ask the flower shop owner to help him. Unfortunately, the owner said she was busy with some pre-orders so she couldn't help Taehyung.

On the bright side, the owner told him that her daughter was willing to help. The latter was a florist. She knew what the devil needed, but she didn't look please to render service.

"What are you staring at!?" The mentioned florist hissed.

"You don't seem very friendly," Taehyung observed, pouting his lips and turning to look at the array of flowers in front of him instead.

The florist sneered in response.

Taehyung hummed, "are you perhaps having relationship problems?" He was talking like PD-nim. This was what his assistant said when Taehyung was acting as if he hated the world.

PD-nim was right. Taehyung was problematic that time. He didn't know what to do with you.

"What is it to you?" The florist snorted once again, causing Taehyung to roll his eyes.

"You're right. It's none of my business so I don't understand why you're diverting your anger towards me," he was losing his patience. "I am your customer. You should be treating me like one."

He had enough bullshit to deal with. He didn't deserve to deal with a rude mortal like this one.

"You're right. I'm sorry," the florist mumbled, embarrassed. She also lowered her voice a little so that her mother couldn't hear her. "I'm just pissed coz my mom won't allow me to leave this shit hole."

Taehyung was surprised when the florist opened up. Huh. People were really something else. They would only treat you right if you showed them that you should be treated right.

Kindness was not an unspoken rule. This was probably the reason why people instantly fell in love with someone who showed them basic act of kindness.

They couldn't distinguish the different between romantic interest from respect and kindness.

"Wow," Taehyung shook his head in disbelief, the corner of his mouth turning up. "This is a shit hole for you? I see that you have high standards."

This flower shop already looked cool.

"First of all, my standards are not high. You are just judgmental," the florist crossed her arms. "You look like an ahjussi so I think by now you should know that just because your so-called standard doesn't live up with the standard of other people, you already have the right to assume what is and what is not."

The florist paused for a while just to swallow thickly.

"This place is a shit hole because I am always stuck here! I don't even have time to see my boyfriend!"

"You have a boyfriend?" Taehyung parted his mouth in shock.

The florist gasped. She had said so many things, yet all that mattered to Taehyung was the boyfriend thing?

Unbelievable.

"What's the problem? You think I'm not pretty enough to have a boyfriend!?"

"First of all, you're assuming facts." Taehyung mimicked the voice of the florist. "Since you look like a kid, I assume that my reaction is understandable."

"I'm not a kid!" The florist gaped at Taehyung. "I'm fifteen years old!"

The devil chuckled upon hearing that.

"So I'm right after all. You are a kid. I understand now why your mother won't allow you to meet your so-called boyfriend," he was still mimicking how the florist acted a few breaths ago.

"How old is he, anyway? That punk better be fifteen too."

"And what if he's older?" The florist challenged.

Taehyung's eyes darkened.

"Then I'll beat him up and report him to the police. Pedophile shit."

The florist looked like the cat got her tongue, causing to Taehyung wiggle his brows in contempt.

"You should breakup with him, kid. I'm serious. I won't have any choice but to tell your mom about this if you—"

"Don't please!" The florist cut him off. She looked startled, tears filling her eyes. "I know he's older than me but he loves me! He said he loves me! We are running away tonight! Please!"

Taehyung was beyond shocked to hear this revelation. This kid knew nothing. She should be stopped.

The devil didn't care if she hated him. She left him with no choice.

Taehyung rushed towards the exit. He spotted the shop owner outside of this store. It looked like she was talking to someone over the phone.

"No!" The florist's lips trembled. She pulled Taehyung's arm, forcing him to look at her.

"Don't tell her!" The girl cried.

Taehyung was about to say something, he was also about to pull his arm away from the child; however, he was too weak to do that.

Suddenly, he was coughing blood.

"Ahjussi!" The florist tried to comfort Taehyung, but the latter shook his head.

No one could help him. This was not happening because he was sick or whatever.

Taehyung knew this was the effect of trying to do good things.

He was the devil. He was supposed to tempt human beings to give into the darkness.

Either that or he would continue to suffer.

Taehyung chose the former option.

He couldn't suffer anymore. He was not stupid. He was aware that he would die if he still played the role of a hero.

He couldn’t do good things anymore. He couldn't be someone who he was not.

"H-Hey, kid?" Taehyung puked. His head was spinning and he felt like his body was burning.

He could even feel his horns threatening to show.

"Y-You....wanna get...o-out of this..." Taehyung panted. "Shit hole, right?"

"Yah, ahjussi!" The girl cried. "How could you think about that right now? You're hurt."

She was sobbing. She appeared feisty but she was just a soft person.

It was a shame that he had to corrupt her mind.

"You won't get away..." Taehyung inhaled deeply.

His head wasn't spinning anymore. It still hurt but it was tolerable now. This was because he was starting to tempt the florist.

Angry people, scared people...These were the type of people who were easy to corrupt.

"Unless we get rid of your mom first,"

"W-What are you saying?" Fear crossed her face; she took a step away from Taehyung.

The devil only smirked.

"Your mother doesn't love you. She doesn't want you to be happy. She's taking you away from the only person who really loves you..."

The florist was shaking her head as the devil fed her with lies.

"I-I can't...that's not—" She trailed off. She wanted to say that Taehyung was lying, yet she couldn't.

Her young love was poisoning her mind.

She didn't know what was true and what was made up.

"Come on, sweetheart." Taehyung took a step closer to her, reaching for the knife the florist used to cut the stem of the flowers.

"You just have to stab her on the stomach. She's going to get hurt but she's not gonna die." He was handing her the weapon. "Just one stab. It will buy you time. You can run away while I take her to the hospital."

Taehyung stopped talking when the girl pursed her lips.

Silence engulfed them.

Seconds later, the girl took the knife.

"I'll do it." She said.

Taehyung's grin grew wider.

"That's a good girl."

The florist was decided. She gripped the handle of the knife tighter as she ran towards her mom.

She was close.

But someone stopped her—you stopped her.

"Yeji-ah?" The shop owner called the name of her daughter, her brows were knitted together when she saw how you snatched the knife away from Yeji.

"What's happening?" And of course the mother was confused.

Taehyung fucked up, that's what.

The devil knew this too. He knew he fucked up just by looking at you through the big window of the store.

You saw.

You saw what happened. You knew that Taehyung tempted this poor little girl.

He couldn't be wrong. The glare you were giving Taehyung could attest to that.

Again, you saw.

After almost a year of living with him, you finally saw.

No. You didn't see Kim Taehyung. What you saw was the....

devil.

[gojos-sidepiece-69]

Tokyo Tech Training- Chapter 5

The four of you first-years finally stumbled back to your dorms at the end of the day after an overdose of brain-rotting movies and binging food that would bring you one step closer to Type-2 Diabetes. You decided that a hot shower would help dissolve your stress from earlier, but that didn’t seem like nearly enough...a lightbulb flicked on over your head as you remembered that Tokyo Tech had a natural hot springs on location, and that sounded more than promising. You hadn’t used it yet, but you hoped it was empty; you signed in contentment at the thought of laying in hot water in the dark, unbothered: no thinking about anything, not even your literal deal with the devil. You could worry about that disaster tomorrow; today was enough of a shitshow in and of itself. It was 11:55 PM, so you quietly padded through the dorms so as not to wake anyone up.

You exited the building and strolled to the hot springs behind the building, taking in the cool night air. You inhaled slowly, and the scent of cherry blossoms filled you with tranquility.

In order to get to the hot springs, you had to pass through a small bamboo shed to rinse yourself clean and change into one of the clean bathing suits that were provided in the lockers. You shut the door to the shed behind you softly, and began stripping off your clothes. You kept your clothes out on the bench, much too tired to stow them away in a locker. The water droplets from the shower head felt cool and refreshing, and you walked over to the corner to pick up a swimsuit.

However, a small part of your brain told you that there was no way anyone would see you here; after all, it was dark and past the usual students’ bedtime on the weekdays. They were all such early risers. So you decided to forego a swimsuit and lay in the hot springs completely nude, because that would be the most relaxing. Who was going to judge you, anyways? People did this all the time. You grabbed a white towel to take with you for drying off after the soak, and headed out towards the spring.

You slipped into the hot water and sighed deeply, closing your eyes. You were in the moonlight surrounded by cherry blossom trees, beautiful black rocks, and the peaceful sound of water flowing. You leaned your head back against one rock and smiled, almost drifting off into sleep. The water felt like silk draped around you, and you were in it deep with only your head above the surface. “I didn’t peg you as the type to skinny dip at night, princess. But you keep proving me wrong,” said a familiar voice in a cocky, insolent tone. Your eyes flew open in fear, unfortunately landing on Gojo Satoru leaning back against a rock five feet away from you, head tilted upwards.

Your heart rate quickened with anger. This was supposed to be your night alone, head clear except for the sounds of running water. Your fool of a sensei was supposed to be 38 floors above you somewhere downtown, probably screwing another girl. Not sitting across from you, ruining your night. “What the hell are you doing here?” You said angrily, crossing your arms.

“Well, after a long day of exorcising high-grade unregistered curses all on my own, I thought I deserved a nice little dip in the spring. Funny, though, don’t people usually put something on before they jump right in?” He teased you and you instantly remembered how exposed you were to him. Even if it wasn’t anything he hadn’t already seen before, it still made you nervous. Why were you nervous? Nothing was going to happen. This was your night to unwind. You looked at him for a minute, trying not to stare. He had taken off his stupid black sunglasses and had his eyes closed, head still tilting up. He hadn’t opened them or looked at you yet, and you were just waiting for his eyes to pierce into yours. He looked like a sculpture, his strong arms resting on other rocks and his collarbones glistening with moisture. You scoffed at his comment. “Why are you here, exhibitionist?” He asked with a smile, and your face reddened at his comment.

“I’m not an exhibitionist. You think I care about getting your attention? I’m not that pathetic,” you jumbled out. “And if you must know, I’m here to relax after all the shit you’ve put me through in the past few days.” His smile deepened as he finally turned toward you and opened his beautiful eyes. You swallowed as he got up from his position and moved closer to you in the water. “Sweetheart, I haven’t put you through anything you didn’t want to do yourself. And I would argue that you do quite a lot to get my attention. Already forgetting about just yesterday, when you were jizzing all over yourself to the sight of me? You couldn’t keep your hands out of your pants.” Your chest started heaving as you forgot how to breathe.

He moved closer. “As for relaxing, I think I can help you with that.” He stopped about a foot away from you and your stomach flipped. “But I’m only going to help you if you ask me real nicely, like a good girl.” You silently cursed him for being such a stupid tease. Your brain was telling you to just get out of there before things escalated, to keep your ego and moral high ground intact, but those things were long gone. You hated yourself for thinking with your heat instead of your head. Damn it. You chewed on the inside of your lips, salivating at the sight of Gojo in the water. You could see droplets clinging to his chest, torso, and...v-line. His boxers were underwater, but he smirked when he caught you staring. “It’s not polite to stare,” he said intimidatingly, standing at full height, while you were still mostly underwater.

Your eyes snapped up to meet his, and you almost folded under the weight of your lust. Seeing him touch another woman yesterday only made you ten times hungrier for him. You needed a taste or you would lose your mind.

You could only manage a weak, “Come here,” but that wasn’t enough for him. He tutted and shook his head. “I said, ask politely. Remember the magic words?” You wanted to strangle him. “Please, Gojo?” Your voice almost cracked with impatience. “Wrong! You’re forgetting already?” He laughed, crossing his arms. Your mind flashed back to your first night together, when he asked you for those “magic words” before he went down on you. Oh. “Please...come over here, Sensei,” you said quietly, and he flashed his white teeth. “Good. Was that so hard?” He closed the remaining distance between you and you could’ve sworn your heart was going to burst right out of your chest.

He bent over and wrapped his fingers around the backs of your thighs, lifting you up onto the edge of a large, smooth black rock. Water spilled down from your body, revealing it all to Gojo. His head was directly level with your chest, but he didn’t make any sign of moving it yet. “Gojo, come on, I already asked you nicely. What else do you want?” You whined quietly. “Nothing, I’m just admiring the view,” he smiled, rolling your eyes at his boyishness. He secured both of his large hands tightly around your waist to keep you from slipping off the rock, and started sucking at one of your breasts. He started with just moving his tongue over your nipple slowly, and then took the whole breast in his mouth. He moved his tongue in a way that was making your pulse quicken and your thighs slick.

You wrapped your legs around him, pulling him in closer. He pulled his mouth off of your breast, and you looked down at it and nearly moaned at the sight of it: wet from his mouth, and left with tiny purple spots to mark his territory.

He moved onto your other breast, his face completely shoved against it. You could feel him smile against your chest, tongue again swiping torturously slowly across your nipple. You started panting, and you felt embarrassed that he could feel your heart moving at a million miles per hour while he was somehow still completely calm and collected. You gripped roughly at his wet hair, and whispered to him, “Need...need more.” He looked up at your blushing face and quirked an eyebrow. “More? You should’ve just said so. Always remember, communication is key,” he said as he roughly parted your thighs. “Shut up, idiot,” you choked out after his stupid insertion of a “wise” life lesson. He kept your shaking legs open with a Vice-like grip, and dipped his head down. His breathed teased against your opening for a few seconds, until he finally gave into his need to taste you.

His tongue took a broad stroke up your heat, lapping at the juices. He moaned lightly and pulled his head back out to make eye contact with you. “You taste so fucking good, sweetheart. You’re just gonna sit nice and still for me while I taste you, okay?” You nodded, and he went back down. He talked into your pussy as he said, “So pretty and wet, just for me,” and you just about lost it. His hands massaged and rubbed at your inner thighs softly while his tongue ravaged your pussy. He stopped at times to suck and blow onto your clit, and you had to forcefully bite down onto one hand to keep from screaming out and waking up everyone in Tokyo. The other still gripped onto Gojo’s hair. You could only moan softly as your teacher got you wetter and closer to your destination.

You pushed your legs around him tighter, and he kept moaning softly as he picked up his pace. He pulled his head back to look up at the mess you were, and made direct eye contact while inserting one, then two, of his fingers. You let out a feral sound, and he laughed at the effect he had on you. His ego liked how easily he could make you lose your mind, begging for him desperately like he was the only man on earth. He never broke eye contact while he grinned and pumped his fingers in and out of you. Your release was threatening to fall over, but you seemed to have an issue finishing without him telling you to. “Pl-please,” you panted breathily, and Gojo laughed up at you again.

“Okay, okay, needy. That’s it, you did amazing for me. You can cum now,” as he bent down to place another heavy kiss on your clit. You moaned loudly into your mouth as you came onto his luscious lips, and he groaned slightly. He pulled you off of the rock and onto the ground, and your legs almost gave out. He licked the mess you made off of his lips before saying cheekily, “You liked that, huh. Just can’t keep away from me. You feel more relaxed now?” You couldn’t help but nod, head still spinning from your intense orgasm.

“I could tell,” he said. Before you could think about returning the favor, your white-haired man-whore turned around and walked right out of the hot springs. Your eyes trailed over his back muscles longingly as he entered back into the bamboo shed. He left you with a dull ache between your thighs and a heaving chest. You raked a hand through your wet hair and squeezed your eyes shut. And just like that, the rational thinking and whatever was left of your moral compass came flooding back in. God damn it, again?! So this was going to be a regular thing now? Being fuck-buddies with your ridiculously attractive teacher? This was so illegal...but then again, since when were any of the rules in this Jujutsu world unbreakable?

You sunk back down into the hot springs and sighed. The amount of shame that washed over you was significantly smaller, because as much as you hated to admit it...he really did help you unwind. And release some pent-up stress. Okay, a lot of pent-up stress. You leaned your head back against a smooth rock and decided on a short nap before taking on the challenge of walking up to your dorm because you weren’t sure you’d be able to walk straight.

After a fifteen-minute power nap, you heaved yourself up out of the water and wrapped the fluffy white towel around your body. You made your way into the shed again, sleepily searching for the bench with your clothes on it. You could’ve sworn you put it on that one over there...your eyes narrowed as you frantically searched all the lockers for your clothes. Where the fuck were they? You couldn’t just walk back through the school in a towel, you’d get in trouble for sure...and then it dawned on you. Bastard. Gojo, the biggest fool of them all, probably thought it was a funny idea to snatch your clothes, leaving you even more of a hot mess than you already were. You were threatening to boil over in anger, so you picked up your phone to call him immediately.

He picked up after one ring, “Want more already?” He said airily. You could tell he was driving away fast, back to his place. “Shut the fuck up and listen for once in your life. Did you take my clothes?” Your voice shook. He gasped. “Why would you accuse me of such a thing?! I would never. That being said, yes, I took them. I couldn’t help it, your little pink panties were just so cute,” he laughed.

You couldn’t take it anymore. “Get over here right now. I’m not walking back through the school in a towel,” you said sternly. “Not a chance, sweetheart,” Gojo sang. “You’ll have to come get them yourself if you want them.” That wasn’t about to happen. “Go fuck yourself,” you said, and before hanging up on him, he replied, “Oh, I will, darling.” You were so angry that you ran all the way back to your dorm, not caring about loudly your feet were stomping on the floorboards. You saw three sleepy, confused faces peep out at you from their rooms, but they dismissed seeing a large, white fluffy bird fly past them as a weird dream.

You slammed your door shut and threw your towel to the side, putting on some actual clothes. You put your hands up against the wall and breathed for a minute, trying to process your emotions. This boy was going to leave you in a wheelchair and in therapy. You were ripped from your animalistic rage when you heard your phone chime. It was a single picture from your sensei. Him dangling your lacy underwear from his long index finger. You felt a familiar blush rising to your cheeks, but shook it away as you threw your phone against the nearest wall.

🌹

[writingsfromhome]

Nuclear Family V

Part Five: Some Things Never Change

A/N: I’ve reread and rewrote and finally wrapped this up! It got really long because I didn’t want to drag it into another part, but I did include an epilogue--I couldn’t help myself. Hope it lives up to the expectations! And thank you x100000 again for reading along <3

Part I / Part II / Part III / Part IV / Part V

---------------

The next morning, we sit down together and soothe Charlie's worries. Harry holds my hand at one point and we play the best acting gig either of us have ever played as we pretend there's not a ginormous unspoken trilogy between us. Charlie's tentative at first, but when Harry pulls her onto his knee and whispers something to her. She breaks into a giggle and hugs him. At least that was patched over, I think. But when Harry meets my eyes over her head, I look away. Some things might never be patched over.

I’d set up a play date this morning, thinking Charlie might have needed a distraction. It also gave me time to pack our things without her to distract me or feel the emotional baggage I was packing up too.

I had planned to find an air bnb, waking up at 7am to start searching. But when I updated Marc after he asked what I was doing that evening, he insisted we stayed with him. We’d lived together before, and he was almost always at work, so it gave us enough space.The best part was he lived in the same building as Harry; it was almost too perfect, and when I’d asked Charlie she was totally on board. Spending time with Marc while being able to take the elevator to see her dad sounded just sounded like her play place had expanded.

After Charlie leaves, and I’m almost done packing, I look for Harry to talk. I find him toweling his hair after his shower. He had to head out for shooting today so I needed to speak to him before he left or else he would think I slighted him. He notices me in the foggy mirror and turns, and I try not to find the towel tied around his waist distracting.

“Hey, so...I’ll be out of your hair today...no pun intended.” I laugh lamely after he continues to stare at me blankly. Okay, maybe his towel was more distracting than I’d like to admit. And this was an awkward conversation when we had so many unspoken things between us. “Um, so I found other accommodations finally. So we’ll move out and it’ll be like we planned initially?”

“Huh?” Harry freezes, arms in midair.

“I don’t know why it took me this long to find another place,” I blabber on. “But I think yesterday was kind of a wake up call? I shouldn’t have stayed this long anyway and-”

“Wait, Y/N, stop. You’re leaving?”

“Just the flat,” I finally look at him, he looks stony. “We’ll actually just be a few floors down staying with Marc, so it’s kind of perfect.”

“Marc?” A flame lights itself in his eyes, usually the colour of a spring field, they’ve now turned into a field of ashes as he realises what I’m saying. “You’re moving out? To Marc’s? Because of yesterday?”

“Yes, that’s what I just said.” I try to remain calm, but it’s hard when he’s acting like this. “Harry, yesterday just made me realise I’d lost sight of the horizon or whatever. We were never supposed to live with you for this reason! We knew when we planned this that it would complicate things. I was just so obsessed with making Charlie’s birthday perfect I didn’t look for anywhere else, and her birthday was basically disastrous so that was useless. Now you can live freely, Miranda can come and go-”

“Oh and living with Marc won’t confuse Charlie?” Harry demands.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I think you know exactly what that mean Y/N. You’re being a bloody hypocrite-”

“What?!” I can’t keep the calm anymore. “I’m a hypocrite?”

“Yes! You! You think Charlie seeing Miranda and me together would confuse her yet you’re taking her to your boyfriend’s house-”

“Who said anything about my boyfriend--and how dare you sound so judgemental about that! Sorry I didn’t get the memo; Harry can have a girlfriend but Y/N can’t! She’s got to be the single virgin mother all by herself!”

“That’s not what I said!”

“No, I think it’s what you were trying to say! Being so fucking judgemental about my love life. This isn’t my fault! I’m not asking you shit, Harry!”

“What the fuck Y/N!” Harry whips the towel he was using for his hair onto the ground. My heart beats erratically in my chest; the last time we fought like this it was because I’d told him I was pregnant and it had ended really ugly. But the way he got under my skin, as hard as I wanted to be the mature one, I couldn’t. “You don’t have to be so bloody sarcastic all the time! I just don’t understand how living with Marc will be any better!”

“Marc’s barely every home, and he’s lived with us before, it’s worked out fine. Charlie adores him-”

“Oh yeah I bet she does! You would’ve loved it if Marc was her father yeah? He’s always had a thing for you, even when we were together. Now’s your chance to be a perfect little family with Marc!”

“I did not say that, don’t put words in my mouth-”

“Oh, but I think that’s what you were trying to say,” Harry mocks me. He’s a ball of rage as he stalks towards me. “I don’t understand your obsession with this guy and why he’s so close to Charlie!”

“You know Marc! We’ve been friends with him for-wait why am I defending myself? This isn’t about that!”

“Well I think it should be!”

“Where are you going with this Harry?!” I shout, putting my hands out to his chest as he continues walking towards me, as if maybe I could shield myself from his growing fury. “I don’t want to fight! I’m just trying to do what’s best for Charlie. And for us.” 

We stare at each other, uncomfortably close, chests heaving as the fire crackles low.

“Well, too late for that.” He says, but the snark is gone. “I’ve finally got Charlie living with me and you’re taking her away.”

“I-I’m not taking her away.” My voice rises immediately. “Don’t you dare say I’m taking her away!”

“You are!” He says stubbornly.

“What the fuck do you expect? You want me to stick around so it’s you, me, and Charlie? You want me to stay here and be miserable, have our kid be confused about what’s going on with who?”

“I don’t want you to be miserable, I just want us in one place!”

“We’re not this perfect little nuclear family you have in your head! We can’t be!”

“Not when you’re bringing the nuclear into the family,” Harry mutters immaturely.

“Oh my god, what’s wrong with you?!” I want to pull my hair out.

“What’s wrong with me is you’re taking away my daughter from me!”

My blood was just boiling now. I get in his face, “Harry, do you not remember that you never wanted us? You had the option to stay with me, while I was pregnant with Charlie. You had the option to hold your daughter the day she was born. You could’ve had all of it. Every step of the way! You chose not to, you let me go, you-you told me I could go...” I break off suddenly, so I didn’t sob as the memories rush back. I told everyone I was over it, I had processed it. But when Harry rejected me, he also rejected Charlie and I never got over that.

Harry hears my breath hitch, he backs away from my outstretched hands and I let them drop.

After a heavy silence, Harry speaks up: “Y/N I’m sorry. I heard what you said yesterday. I was up all night just thinking about it...”

“Well that’s wonderful for me,” I retreat into the comfort of sarcasm.

“No--you were right, I didn’t want commitment. I was bloody afraid of it. I was listening to everyone who said if I had a kid, my career would be over. I wanted to stay young, and I just let you deal with it by yourself. I was selfish and I wish I could go back and change everything.”

“Well that’s not much help now; you never once said any of this to me! You moved on--don’t deny it. I saw you in the tabloids, the media. You don’t think I kept track of you? I loved you! You’re the father of my kid, and while I was up on less than an hour of sleep trying to get your 2 month old to stop crying at 3am, you were out partying with models and getting smashed.”

“I couldn’t-I just spiraled-”

“Well it’s nice that your spiraling looks so much like partyingl” I roll my eyes. “Mine looked like crying in the bathtub with my ears ringing, and covered in baby vomit.” I cross my arms. I had held it in for four long years, it was about time I snapped, and I guess this was it.

“Y/N.” he turns away from me, rubbing his face. When he turns around, his heart is on his sleeve. “There were so many times I would pick up my phone and type in your number, just to hear your voice. Just to ask you about Charlie--it ripped me apart that I wasn’t there. That you weren’t here, with Charlie. You’d send me pictures of her and I would get so excited to see what she was up to, what new thing she learned...”

He breaks off, his face now shining with tears. He walks up to me and holds my hands, my heart tugs and I know I’m crying too. “Y/N when I held her for the first time when she was a few months old, and she looked up at me and smiled. I didn’t even know I could love like that. So I changed Y/N--tell me you saw me doing anything reckless after that first visit. I made sure I grew up so I could always be there for her. And you. But you never talked to me. You were always so cold to me and I was scared to break the ice. So I just let you raise her without me, not realising what I was missing out on. I fucking missed all of it because I was just trying find the perfect words to get this off my chest and I never found them.”

“Harry-” I sigh. “You could’ve tried. But...you moved on though. You have a girlfriend-”

“I had to try to move on,” he explains urgently. “You barely spoke to me. I’d ask how you are and you wouldn’t always reply, our texts were only about Charlie. You never invited me over when I was in LA. I thought you didn’t care about me so I had to move on, and the way we ended things I didn’t blame you! I let you know I would be there for Charlie--but I had to move on because I didn’t think we would ever have another shot.”

“I didn’t know what to say to you when you came over Harry. The way we left things before I moved back home, It was awful.” I whisper. The words he’d said, the things I said, the broken glass and just hours of fighting. Then the panic attacks and crippling fear of not knowing what I was doing with my life. It was easy to let it harden you, rather than invite it back in.

“The way I let you leave...was awful.” He agrees. “So I’m asking you now to stay Y/N.”

“And do what?” I ask, didn’t he get it? “Sit around while your girlfriend is over all the time, have her pop in with her own key while I’m only just woken up looking like a troll? Let you kiss me in the dark when she’s not around? Have her ignore me like I’m not even there?”

Harry has the decency to look embarrassed, dropping my arms. He sighs, and looks at me with regret. “This is balls up.”

“Yeah, I know Harry. That’s why I’m finding other accommodations.”

“I don’t like it’s with Marc.”

“I don’t care Harry, you don’t have any say over who I stay with.”

“But Charlie-”

“She can stay with you when she wants,” I agree. “I know you’ve got a shoot all week so it’s a good week to be out.”

“I like coming home to you two.”

“Harry,” I warn him. He couldn’t afford to speak like this when he had a girlfriend. I didn’t want to fall for him again. He made it hard not to.

“I don’t like it but I can’t stop you.” He concedes, arms crossed over his chest. I skim over the bare flesh, taking in the ink that Charlie loved to ask a million questions about. He notices me looking and I catch the cocky grin on his face.

“I’m looking at the ink,” I say, even though I didn’t have to defend myself.

“I know,” he shrugs but the grin stays on his face. I roll my eyes and head back to finish packing but he pulls me back to him and suffocates me against his bare chest. “I’m sorry, for then. For now. Forever.”

He lets me go but he keeps his arms around my waist. I look up at him and for the first time in a long time, I see my old Styles. Confident, determined, and a little cocky. The one I fell hard for.

“Noted,” I say, not giving in this easily, I still had to process this whole conversation and figure out what this thing between Harry and I meant.

A low chuckle bursts out from him as he stares down at me. “I miss you,” he says.

“I’m right here,” I say, stepping back so he lets me go. I leave him with a smile on his face, not ignoring the way he said he misses me. Without even realising it, my feelings of resentment had begun to slip away. But I still knew space would be best for both of us.

***

It’s Thursday evening, Charlie was with Harry having dinner at his mum’s place. Marc’s edition is officially in printing and he’s home at a decent enough hour that I put aside my work and share a glass of wine with him.

“Sounds intense,” Marc says to me after I give him the details of mine and Harry’s fight. Since then, we’d have breakfast as a family once but I did text him beyond just talking about Charlie. Pictures, memes, old memories, the occasional pointless text. It was sort of nice having him in my life again.

Charlie was going to work with him tomorrow, and she was so excited about that. It gave me time for alone time, and to catch up with Marc.

“It was intense, it felt like the old Y/N and Harry.”

“Uh oh. I don’t miss them,” Marc huffs. “You’re a lot nicer now, and he’s not as much of a cocky bastard anymore.”

“Wow, tell me how you really feel.” I tease. But he was right, back then I was young and sassy and I wasn’t afraid to let the world know. Marc and I had met when he reached out to me to write an article for his magazine and it was a coincidence that Marc and Harry knew each other from cover shoots. Marc used to be a photographer.

“I like this Y/N better,” Marc leans into me, his voice deepening. “She’s kind and strong and gorgeous, and the best part is she lets me kiss her.”

He pauses in front of my face and I lean the rest of the way in to let him know he could. That’s all the signal he needs. Our drinks abandoned, we quickly move into the bedroom and I can’t believe I forgot how good it felt to be wanted like this.

***

The next time I’m in Harry’s flat, I’m picking Charlie up. She stayed with him, but Miranda had surprised him by showing up early right after her flight landed. His short text made me get up there right away, after what happened the last time Charlie saw Harry and Miranda together, I wasn’t sure if she would misbehave.

But oddly, she’s mostly quiet.

“Did you have fun?” I ask Charlie, as she eats her cereal slowly. Her back is to the hall Harry stands in and it was a good thing as Miranda drapes herself across him. Unfortunately, I had to see it; I guess she got the memo that Charlie knew what was going on, and she was okay with it--or as okay as a four year old could be.

“It was so cool mom,” Charlie says. “There was so many rooms and one was space! It had the moon and there was a castle and they made the explosion sound and...” Charlie explains in no sensible order everything she saw at the studio, and I listen to her spill out her excitement but every so often my eyes drift to where Miranda shamelessly reunites with Harry. It makes my stomach turn. Especially after the conversation we had. I wasn’t an idiot, I knew Harry wasn’t going to rearrange his whole life because we’d finally had the Talk about what happened between us all those years ago. It was just watching them, and knowing that that was Harry moving on. From me...when I never fully moved on from him. It was pathetic, I know.

“Have you had coffee yet?” Harry asks a little while later after he’s unhooked Miranda’s claws from him and made his way to the kitchen. Charlie is slowing down her speech but when Harry appears she launches into more questions about set and when his “movie” would come out (it was a music video).

“No, I saw your text as soon as I woke up.” I say, between Charlie’s breaths. IT seemed she was going to be a while. “I could use a cup.”

“I heard you’re staying with Marc,” Miranda suddenly comes up and sits at the table, addressing me. “He’s a nice guy, I’ve worked with him in the past. Easy on the eyes too.”

“I’m right here,” Harry holds up my empty cup and looks pointedly at her. She winks and I nearly vomit.

I smile instead, “Yeah. He’s a really good friend, and Charlie loves him. And he lives downstairs so it worked out really well.”

“Yeah,” she smiles. This was the most she’s said to me since she got here. I watch as she glances at Harry who’s making my coffee the way I like it. “I heard you two are really good friends.”

Yeah...” I didn’t like what she was insinuating. I look up at Harry but he’s suddenly very interested in the sugar. “I can do that.” I grab it from him and make sure to glare at him as he passes it to me.

“We should do like, a double date.” She suggests. “Harry, don’t you think that would be fun? You and me, Y/N and Marc?”

“What about me?” Charlie pouts.

“You and Gemma!” Harry looks at me. “I forgot to mention, Gemma wanted to take Charlie out, spend some time with her while she was in London.”

“Perfect!” Miranda sounds almost too excited. It makes me suspicious.

***

When I tell Marc about the double date, he’s more than eager to attend. I know he just wanted to annoy Harry. I was nervous what this all meant.

But somehow I find myself standing with Marc in front of the restaurant while I try to prepare myself for whatever the evening held for us. Marc eventually just grabs my hand, winks, and pulls me in even though I wanted to just stay outside for a bit longer. Maybe a lot longer. Maybe just never go in.

As dinner goes on, things grow more and more awkward. Miranda is chatting up Marc about their old shoots, Harry grows more irritated as Marc receives all the attention, and his eyes track Marc’s hand any time it’s near me. I knock back my wine, as does Harry. Miranda continues to chat up Marc, and I inhale the food when it finally comes simply because the whole situation was stressful.

“The food’s good here,” I comment but only Harry hears me over the other conversation at the table.

“I always wanted to take you here,” Harry comments. “It has the best victoria sponge I’ve ever had.”

“You know I hate victoria sponge,” I scrunch my nose.

“I know!” Harry laughs which seems to get the table’s attention. His laugh usually did, as I’ve said. “That’s why you have to try it, you’ll finally like it.”

“Like what?” Marc asks.

“Victoria sponge,” I cringe visibly which makes him laugh.

“I think she loves cheesecake too much, right?” I know Marc is remembering the night I came to his house after a big fight with Harry, he’d bought a cheesecake for his then-girlfriend but I’d cried into it and finished the whole thing in one sitting. He’d had to improvise with cupcakes the next day. I still feel bad about that.

“Y/N is a cheesecake fanatic,” Harry says a little aggressively.

“Cheesecake’s way too fattening,” Miranda says absentmindedly, not realising what she was implying.

When the table grows awkwardly silent, Harry tries to come to her rescue. “That’s when you know it’s good food.”

“Touche,” I tip my glass just to have an excuse to have something to do and...well, drink.

At the end of the night, Harry asks if we want to go back to his place. I say no as Marc says yes and because he had the louder voice that’s what we do. I shoot him a dirty look but he only winks at me. He was having way too much fun.

Harry excuses himself and joins us in the Uber late. In his hands is a box with victoria sponge.

***

“Do you think he knows I’m not your boyfriend?” Marc asks later that night. We’d drank another bottle of wine and everyone was a bit more...vocal than before. What started out as fun stories from our younger days, quickly turns into passive aggressive comments as Harry stared a hole at Marc’s hand on my thigh, and Miranda stared at Harry staring at Marc’s hand on my thigh. She’d asked to speak to him midway through and now they were arguing in another room where every so often we caught some of their argument.

“You can’t even take your eyes off..............a bloody cake? You didn’t even think to.........I don’t get it!” That was Miranda.

“Thinking too much..........stop........of course I love you.......Charlie’s mom!” and that was Harry.

“I just knew this dinner would go like this,” Miranda says loudly.

“So you’re testing me now?” 

“Yes Harry, that’s obvious isn’t it Y/N?” Marc comments beside me.

“You’re having too much fun,” I lean my head back and sigh against the headrest.

“I have a stressful job, I don’t go out often. Can you blame me for being mildly entertained here?”

“Ugh...yeah okay me too.” I look over at him and he laughs. I hated the tension it was causing between Harry and I but I couldn’t help the small petty satisfaction of showing Miranda up after she tried to steal the show at dinner tonight. “What happened to the flight attendant you were seeing?”

“She took a flight out of London and never called me back?”

“Poor you,” I pat his shoulder. “We’re just not cut out for relationships are we?”

Marc shakes his head solemnly. I sigh, the alcohol making me more melodramatic than I was. “We’re finding my ex and his girlfriend arguing, entertaining. Who am I?”

“This is why we get along,” Marc leans into me, he smelled good. “Two boring people, getting our petty kicks with other people’s drama.”

“I think this is kind of my drama too,” I groan.

"Then I guess it’s kind of my drama too,” Marc says happily.

“You’re serious,” I say, leaning my head back against the sofa again, too tired to say anything else.

“I always have your back,” Marc says and I open my eyes just as he nuzzles a kiss against my exposed neck, and Harry walks into view.

“Harry,” I sit up and Marc jolts up as I nearly knock my head into his. Harry looks roughened up, his hair lays every which way as if he ran a rake through it. His face is flushed yet he stares at Marc like he wants to pop his head off.

“I’m really sorry, I’m going to have to call it a night. Miranda is...we have to talk and-”

“Yep, yep, we’re out.” I don’t need to be asked twice. Neither does Marc. Marc heads immediately to the door but I pause by Harry.

“Sorry...” he apologizes again. He looks like a lost puppy which is what makes me press a quick kiss to his cheek.

“We’ll talk in the morning. Gemma is dropping Charlie off around noon.”

“Okay,” Harry looks over my head to Marc, who is opening the door to give us some privacy. He looks back at me, searching my face for something. “I didn’t want the evening to end like this, it’s just...complicated.”

“I get it,” I cut him off, and more gently say again, “I’ll call you tomorrow, okay?”

“Yes please,” he mumbles. Even though Harrys’ done this to himself, I can’t help but feel a little bad. I pat his arm and turn to head out with Marc. Harry could get himself out of the mess if he wanted.

***

I don’t hear from Harry the next morning, before I pick up Charlie, he leaves me a cryptic text that we should probably not go over today. Charlie and I spend the day exploring London some more instead, although she’s tired in a few hours so we end up picking up Marc after work and enjoying dessert by the river.

I still hear nothing on Saturday morning, Charlie asks about Harry and I lie saying he way busy. It’s only around noon that a haggard Harry shows up at Marc’s door. I was helping load the dishwasher so Marc answers the door. It’s the loud shout from Charlie that alerts me to the guest.

I pass Marc on my way to the door, he just raises his eyebrows to say yikes and it’s an understatement when I see him. Messy hair, a five ‘o clock shadow, and he looks like he hadn’t slept.

“You look...rough.” I say while Charlie sits on his back. I almost want to tell her to be fragile with him with the way he looked.

“It’s been a rough couple days.” He comments, his voice scratchy. “I need to talk to you.”

“Charlie, love, go inside for a bit? I’ve got to speak with your dad.”

“Aww,” she moans as Harry helps her dismount.

“I’ll play with you later little monkey,” Harry tickles her and she squeals as she runs away. His eyes follow her with a smile.

“So...” I step into the hall, tilting the door behind me.

“I think Miranda and I broke up.”

“Ah,” that made sense. “What happened?”

“She...it’s so complicated. Why are women so complicated?”

“Woman here,” I point to myself and raise an eyebrow. He shakes his head and sighs.

“Apparently she...set up that double date so I could see you’d moved on. Except, according to her, the way I was acting made her realise she was never going to measure up to you. She...she wanted me to choose between you and her, I told her...” he gulps, leaning against the opposite wall for some support. “It wasn’t the same. You were Charlie’s mum, we would always be in each other’s lives. She made her peace with it but this morning when I woke up I don’t know...I don’t know what I said. She was just gone. She isn’t answering her phone. I thought we were okay, we made up yesterday but today...I don’t know.”

“Wow,” I didn’t know what else to say. I didn’t think she would actually ask him to choose. And now she went AWOL. “Do you know where she might be?”

“I went to her place, her roommate said she thought she was with me. I just don’t want her to do anything rash.”

“Sorry, Harry.” I look him over, I couldn’t help but feel bad for him. Before I could say anything more, Charlie zips outside with the drawings she had done at the museum. She just wanted his attention, and as he takes them from her he smooths his face over and gives her all the excited feedback she wanted. I slip inside and tell Marc we might head up for a bit.

Harry hesitates before letting us in. The place was a mess. Things are strewn about everywhere. A broken lamp sits near the entrance.

“Woah,” I say.

“Woah” Charlie echoes me with more emphasis.

“Ehm,” Harry scratches his head. “I...was trying to find something.”

“You shouldn’t be so messy dad,” Charlie immediately begins walking to her room, like she always belonged here. A small part of me is already sad for when we had to leave.

“Sorry love,” Harry cracks a grin and we exchange a glance.

“D’you need help...?”

“No, come sit. I’ll pour us a drink.”

We sit in the kitchen, sipping our wine in silence. Charlie plays with her toys in the back, a comforting background noise.

I reach my hand out eventually and brush Harry’s hand on the countertop. He looks over at me, zoning back into the present. His smile is small and sad, dimmed and broken like his lamp. I thread my fingers through his and squeeze for comfort. He brings my hand to his lips and kisses it and I try not to look as affected by it as I feel. He lets go after he kisses it.

“Thanks for being cool about this, I didn’t know who to go to.”

He looks so lost, and upset. I want to comfort him but there are no words I can say to do that. I open my mouth to try to say something anyway, but the familiar sound of his front door opening interrupts me before I can.

“Harry?” Miranda’s distinct voice carries over. Harry shoots out of his chair and goes to meet her. I watch on, out of view as she hugs him and apologises. “I just needed to clear my head. Then I got a taxi and ended up near my mum’s. I think I drank too many mimosas. I don’t know Harry, I brought an apology drink...”

She trails off as she spots Charlie laying down with her toys. She looks towards the kitchen and I look away quick enough to not see if she’d seen me or not.;

“I didn’t realise you had...guests.” She says slowly, slower, I can tell her words slur together. She really did have too much to drink.

“My...Charlie came up, her mum’s just in the kitchen.” Harry says, his words loaded with unspoken meaning.

“Oh. So I leave for a few hours and you invite them back.” My eyes bug out as I realise Miranda was planning on rehashing it right here. I get up and move towards Charlie but unfortunately I have to pass by them to get there.

“I was supposed to see Charlie yesterday, I didn’t know where you went! You weren’t picking up I just invited them up-”

“My phone died!” Miranda pushes Harry away and I move quicker towards Charlie, urging her to go play in her room but she stays on the floor stubbornly.

“Miranda please love, let’s not start this here again. Charlie-”

“What about me Harry? I haven’t gotten any attention from you for weeks! I thought we agreed yesterday-”

“They’re just here for the month! I never get to see her Miranda stop being unreasonable.”

“I don’t know why I thought coming back here was a good idea!” Miranda shouts. I pull Charlie up but even she’s frozen in spot watching Miranda. “You’re just never going to love me the way I want to are you? I’m never going to compare against...her. Them. Whatever!”

Harry tries to soothe her but she throws him off again, dropping her bottle to the floor with a thud. She turns to me while I back away to the bedroom with Charlie. “This is what you wanted isn’t it? Him all to yourself? This is why you came here all along? I bet your air bnb didn’t even have a bloody issue! He never wanted you in the first place! Newsflash: he has a girlfriend! Me! Not you-”

“Miranda! Enough.” Harry says and she shuts up. I scoop Charlie up and take her to the room but she starts crying because she dropped Oreo in the living room. I go back for it and Miranda is shouting at Harry, either she was too drunk to care or she was at the end of her stick. Or both. But when she starts to swear Harry tries to move her outside.

“It’s not like she can hear over how loud she’s fucking crying!” Miranda shouts. She really was having this breakdown here, but I pause. I wasn’t okay with her talking about Charlie like that, and I watch as Harry freezes over as he feels the same way.

“Miranda. That’s enough.” He says seriously.

“I’ve had enough Harry,” she’s on the verge of tears. I shuffle back to the bedroom and quiet Charlie down but as soon as she does the shouting gets loud enough that we can hear.

“Why is she yelling at dad?” Charlie asks, her nose red from crying.

“She’s...upset.” I say lamely.

“She shouldn’t yell at him,” she says quietly.

“Sometimes, when you’re that upset it just feels like you have to yell. But you’re right, we shouldn’t yell at each other. They’ll be okay.”

Eventually they quiet down and I feel like a prisoner stuck in the room, wondering when it was okay to leave. Charlie feels the same way because she eventually opens the door when I’m distracted and heads out.

“Charlie,” I whisper from the room but she doesn’t come back. It’s oddly quiet out and when I peep through there’s nobody actually there. I strain my ears and maybe hear them in the bedroom. I guess he’d convinced her to move location.

There’s a feeling in my stomach, like a hard seed rooting in place and pulling up the dirt as it sprouts up into my chest. I suddenly just wanted to go home, back to LA. It felt so complicated here, and I know Charlie felt at home with her dad but I was just a traveler passing through here. London, felt like a home, but it wasn’t my home. And the feeling forces me to sit down on the edge of the couch. Charlie notices my expression and hovers nearby, eventually climbing up beside me and leaning her head on me. I pull her into me and try to work my way out of the funk I found myself in, turning on the TV just so I didn’t have to suffer in silence.

When Harry eventually comes out with Miranda, I’m making a snack for Charlie who stays seated in front of the TV, eyes glued to whatever was on. I try not to think too hard about why they both looked freshly showered, about what this meant for us all. Miranda sits on the couch and Harry hovers over them all watching. From my view in the kitchen, the feeling from before creeps back. Harry catches my eye just then and raises his chin, is everything okay. I smile reassuringly, it takes everything in me to fake it, before resuming my slicing.

I had to get over Harry, I think. On some level, I was still holding onto him and not dating anyone because I continued to compare everyone to how he made me feel. I was vulnerable living with him, I’d made up some version in my head of a family while I lived here and I watched Harry in his fatherly role. Some part of me hoped it would come true. But watching him with Miranda and Charlie like this, he didn’t need me. I was just a past dream, one that felt good to indulge in. Miranda was clearly his future.

“Charlie,” I call her name once I’ve cut up her snack. I stay in the kitchen, where I watch Harry touch Miranda’s shoulder reassuringly. I watch them make up and then watch as she leaves. Harry doesn’t once come into the kitchen, and I try not to show how gutted I feel.

***

I don’t hear from Harry for a few days. Charlie decided to sleep over for a few days, and I’m more than fine with it as I work to meet some upcoming deadlines. Marc pops in and out of his apartment, we have a few meals together but mostly I let myself get lost in my work. Charlie comes up every so often, but she spends most of her time with her dad. With only one week left here, I understand. I didn’t want to be around him, and make it harder for me to move on.

With less than a week to stay, Charlie asks me curiously as I put her to bed,

“Is Uncle Marc your boyfriend?”

“What?” I stare at her, where was that question coming from? Marc and I made sure to keep our distance whenever she was here. “Why would you ask something like that?”

“I dunno. Dad said you cared about Marc.”

“Dad said what?” I breath deeply. For someone who was calling me a hypocrite he outright told Charlie Marc was my boyfriend? “Marc and I are just good friends honey, like you and Carrie. I don’t know why your dad said that.”

“I like Uncle Marc,” Charlie says as she grows sleepy. “He’s nice.”

I grind my teeth, why would Harry say something like that?

I go back to the living room where I was working on an article, Marc sits opposite me working late too. But no matter how many times I read what I wrote, I can’t focus. My mind spins asking why Harry would tell Charlie something like that.

“Where are you going?” Marc asks as I get up suddenly.

“I’m leaving Charlie asleep here,” I pick my sweater off the couch and slip it on. “I need to talk to Harry.”

“It’s 12am,” Marc puts his laptop to the side. “Ohh I see. You don’t have to use code with me love.”

“What?” I’m confused but it clicks a moment later. “Marc don’t be so immature I just need to talk to him about something he said to Charlie.”

“I won’t wait up, don’t worry. Charlie’s fine here.” He resumes working on his laptop and I don’t even bother correcting him. I fly out of the apartment and up to Harry’s. I didn’t care if he was sleeping, I needed to speak to him. I do a quick knock before fiddling with my key, entering the space just as Harry comes into view.

“Y/N?” Harry’s sleepy face stares at me for a beat, his eyebrows furrowed. And suddenly faced with a shirtless Harry, I realise I could have walked in on him doing anything. I didn’t really think this through--Miranda could be over. Shit.

“We needed to talk,” I close the door behind me and stand up straight, ready to lay into him.

“Now?”

“Yes, now. It couldn’t wait.”

“Come in, I guess.” He steps back and I walk into a brighter space, he follows behind.

“Why would you tell Charlie that Marc was my boyfriend? Or we were seeing each other?” I jump right in.

Harry must still be sleep-confused because he sits down on an armchair and stares up at me trying to piece my sentence in his head. My hands on my hips are fists as I wait impatiently.

“I didn’t tell her he was your boyfriend.” He starts slowly. “She just asked why we weren’t hanging out like before and all these questions about--well you know Charlie. So I said it was complicated; we cared about each other but you cared about other people too like Marc.”

“Why bring Marc into this? She doesn’t know anything.”

“I didn’t mean to,” Harry gets defensive. “I was just trying to break it down to her.”

“So you brought Marc and me into her mind as someone I’m with--the reason why we weren’t hanging out like before? As if Miranda and you isn’t excuse enough?”

“Well, not anymore?” He squints up at me.

“Well...why not anymore?” I didn’t follow.

“Y/N...” He stares at me, searching my face as if I was lying but I don’t even know what I would be lying about. I raise an eyebrow. “Miranda and I broke up--that day you were here and she came in, we broke up, I thought you knew that. That’s why Charlie was staying with me for so long, I wasn’t going anywhere.”

“Y-you broke up?” I was stunned, the way it looked to me, they had made up. “Charlie knew?”

“I don’t know. She just thought Miranda wasn’t coming around. I don’t know if it was worth explaining to her.”

“Oh. Wow,” I sit down on the couch, digesting that Harry and Miranda actually broke up that day. All this time I thought he was quiet because they were back together, but he must have been getting over the breakup. And I didn’t even ask him how he was--he must think I was- “Harry I had no idea, I would’ve....done-or said something. If I knew. I’m sorry.”

“I thought you were just staying out of it,” Harry chuckles to himself. “I didn’t realise you didn’t know.”

“The breakup was so...civil. I couldn’t tell! Can you imagine if we broke up like that all those years ago?”

That makes Harry laugh. “Maybe we would have made up quicker.”

“Maybe,” I whisper, playing with the ring on my finger. My mind races as the last few days make a lot more sense. But the only question that lingers on my mind was, why Harry didn’t try to make his move. If all those words he said over the last few weeks were true--why didn’t he try to talk to me? The only thing I can come up with was that he wanted to stay friends. It would get too complicated. “Well, now that that’s cleared I should probably go.”

I stand up as Harry does. He clears his throat, looks up at me like he wants to say something. I wait a moment, and when he doesn’t the awkward starts to settle.

“Sorry for waking you,” I say, trying to signal that I was now leaving.

“Doesn’t matter.” He shrugs it off. “But...aren’t you mad that I told Charlie?”

“Uh, yeah. Kind of,” I try to figure out where he’s going with this. “But, given your circumstances, I’ll let it slide just this once.”

“Oh c’mon Y/N,” There’s a ghost of a smile on his lips. “Don’t give me that. I don’t need your pity-forgiveness.”

“Fine,” I cross my arms playing along. “If that’s what you want, I don’t forgive you.”

“Good. I want to earn my forgiveness.” Harry says, and it sounds like he’s saying one thing but meaning another.

“Okay well, I’ll think of something.”

“I can think of a few things,” he says with a twinkle. I can’t help the laugh that bursts out; he was making me nervous.

“Like what?” I impulsively ask, fuck it I tell myself. If I couldn’t flirt with my daughter’s single dad what was the point, right?

“Hm,” he takes the few steps between us and flashes me a charming smile. “I could get on my hands and knees and beg, or” he tucks a strand of hair behind my ear and his finger traces the curve of my ear down to my neck, his movements slow and his finger dipping borderline dangerous. “I hear jewellery can work.” he taps my chest but just as quickly his hand moves up to cup my face, his thumb brushing my lips, “or I can cook you your favourite meal and watch you enjoy it or...” I keep my eyes on him, trying not to give in, but as soon as he moves his hand up into my hair, I close my eyes without meaning to. He knew my favourite feeling was his fingers in my hair and even now, it was no different.

“Or what?” I whisper, eyes still closed, too afraid of what I’ll see if I open them.

“Look at me,” He whispers. I swallow, he says it again and I finally open my eyes. He’s not even hiding what he wants, but he is holding back. “I don’t want to force you into anything, I want you Y/N...but I know you’re with Marc so if you want me to stop I-”

“Harry,” I cut him off. Marc was right, he really didn’t know--that must be why he left me alone. And now in the midst of this heat, I had to tell him--I’d only played myself: “Marc and I aren’t together. We got together a few times but we were never actually...together.”

“Wait.” his hand leaves my hair and I want to snatch it back. He takes a step away, his eyes flitting at he thinks. “So this whole time?”

I shrug.

“This whole time, you just let me believe you and him...”

I try not to look too guilty as realization dawns on him. When he steps towards me again, his mouth is curved into a smile. And one might think it’s a nice smile, but the look in his eyes, I knew he was gearing up for something, because now he knows I let him believe Marc and I were going out on purpose. And I was going to pay.

“Okay, okay so I can explain,” I hold my hand out but he just keeps walking until I stumble back into the couch I just got up from. He leans over me, and a giggle bursts out from nervousness. “Harry really, I-”

“You let me believe,” he grabs the hand I have raised and envelops it in his, taking away my only defense. “That you were going out with Marc? just to bother me?”

“Well,” I’m at a loss for words as I look everywhere but at his face. “It worked, didn’t it?”

“A little too well,” he murmurs. When I give in and look at him, I'm a goner.

“I'm sorry,” I say. “Really I-”

“You’re not getting away with it that easily.”

“What happened to forgiveness? We can mutually forgive!”

“I’m not that kind of person,” he says. Before I can respond he’s somehow managed to lift me up and sling me over his shoulder.

“This-Harry!” I try to wriggle out but his hands are iron clad on my legs. His apartment floats upside down as he carries me. “I’m sorry! C’mon! This is cruel and unusual punishment! I-”

The breath is knocked out of me as he lays me down on the bed, we look at each other for a moment and then his face cracks into a grin, “Last time I checked, you were into cruel and unusual punishment.”

I laugh, “That was four years ago love, a lot can change in 4 years.”

“Hm,” he leans over me and I crawl up the bed until my head hits the pillow, as he follows. “But some things never change, do they?”

“No,” I stare into his green eyes. They shine with unadulterated joy and adoration. My stomach swarms with butterflies like I’m a teenage girl, like I was Y/N so long ago, excited the hot guy from the party took me home. I hold his face in mine and kiss him with the same joy and adoration. “Some things never change.”

“I love you Y/N,” he says into my neck. I push him up to look at him, he says it again and I can’t stop grinning.

“Are you going to make me wait?” he raises an eyebrow. “Is that my punishment.”

I shake my head, “I think we punished each other enough the last few years.”

He nods in agreement, “That’s deep.”

“So’s my love,” I push the cheesiness which always got him to laugh. He laughs now too, and I feel the small thrill of being the one to do that. “I love you”

“Phew. Now let me kiss you,” he pulls my shirt off effortlessly and our lips meet in the middle, missing each other already.

And as we press into each other, relearning every inch of the other, catching up for all those silent years, we just fit together like we were absolutely made for each other. And truer words didn’t exist: some things never change.

Epilogue

[pipedream-parrish]

Happy 34th birthday, Twinyards

read on AO3

i

It is Aaron’s 14th birthday and he has just found out that he has a brother - a twin brother, an identical twin brother, who looks exactly like him and might just understand him, too. His mom didn’t do anything for his birthday - she hasn’t since he was little, or maybe those long-forgotten memories were really just dreams that have managed to worm their way so deep into his psyche that he’s accepted them as truth. The kids at school sang to him, which was fine, but Aaron can’t help but think maybe now it will be different. Maybe once he meets this brother of his, then they can celebrate their birthdays together. Maybe they can give each other presents, and eat cake, and blow out the candles using the combined forces of their breath. Maybe, maybe, maybe. 

(Andrew spends this birthday choking down cake that Cas got him, trying to hide the fresh marks on his arm, and thinking about the best way to keep his mysterious brother as far away from him as possible)

((one month later, Aaron receives a letter in the mail. He couldn’t tell you everything it said - he just knows that all of these maybes have just been thrown into the middle of a busy highway to be crushed under uncaring tires.))

ii

Its Aaron’s 15th birthday and his mother has celebrated by beating the shit out of him and then throwing a random assortment of pills from the bottom of her purse in his direction as an apology, and Aaron cannot help but think that maybe it won’t have to be like this anymore. He thinks about what Andrew said (Andrew, who really does look just like him, and who seemed so angry about Tilda, and seemed to believe that Aaron didn’t deserve, that he deserved good things--) had said to him, thinks about how maybe when Andrew moves his mom will stop it, maybe it’ll be alright, maybe nothing will hurt anymore and everything will be okay and he’ll have a brother. It’ll be the two of them against the world, and Aaron may not know this other boy all that well, but he promised to protect him, so that must mean something, right? Even if before that he said he didn’t want anything to do with Aaron, he changed his mind, and thats what matters, right? Right? And so when Aaron blows out the birthday candles that he bought for himself at eh convenience store the night before, he wishes for his brother to come home soon, and for them to be a family like they were supposed to be. Like he deserves.

((Six months later, Tilda is dead and Aaron has stopped believing in family.))

iii

It is Andrews’s 16th birthday and he has not spoken more than two words to his brother for most of the year, but Nicky tries to force them to do something, to celebrate, to be normal teenagers for once. Andrew leaves halfway through the elaborate dinner that Nicky has prepared, and pretends not to see the sad look he aims at his retreating back. Pretends that he doesn’t care what Nicky thinks of him, what Aarons thinks of him. Pretends that he stopped caring about Cass, that actually he didn’t care about that, either. Pretends and pretends and pretends, and convinces everyone but himself. 

((He’s not so great at lying to himself yet. He’ll get better with age.)) 

Late that night, after he’s heard everyone else going to bed, he sneaks downstairs and steals a slice of the double-chocolate cake that Nicky got them. There are already a couple of slices out from where Nicky and Aaron had some, so hopefully, this moment of weakness will go unnoticed. 

(Aaron spends his 16th birthday sad and mourning, refusing to look his brother in the eye. When he blows out the birthday candles with no help from a magical brother, he wishes that he never met Andrew in the first place. Not that he believes in magic or wishes or anything good at all, anymore. He barely has a bite of his cake before leaving the table. He, too, pretends not to see Nicky’s teary eyes as he leaves him standing alone in the kitchen, the remnants of a wasted attempt at love scattered all around him)

((he, too, is not so great at lying to himself yet. He, too, will get better with age))

(Nevertheless, when he hears Andrew come downstairs in the dead of night, he creeps into the hallway to watch his petty theft)

((He never mentions it.))

iv

It is Andrew’s 17th birthday and he is so high off the ground that he never even realizes the date.

Or maybe he does and just forgets.

The meds are still new, and he’s not used to them yet. Not used to the loudness, and brightness, and plastered on a smile. His cheeks hurt all the time now - he is constantly working muscles that have not had much use, the last couple of years 

(the last couple of lifetimes)

Needless to say, it is Andrew’s 17th birthday and he does not even realize it, and instead, he spends it in his room, his precious room that has a lock that works, coming apart at all his frying edges. Boys like him were never meant to grow old. Boys like him were never meant to last. And so he lays there and shakes uncontrollably, and laughs, too, tells himself this is fine, he’s fine it’s all fine and knows better than to believes it. Perhaps it is a mercy, that he eventually gets used to the meds. 

Perhaps it is not.

(Aaron doesn’t celebrate his birthday, either. Instead, he picks up extra shifts at Edens and goes to bed early. 

He cannot wait to leave this fucking house)

v

It is Aaron’s 18th birthday, meaning that he is a legal adult. He finds this funny. He has always been an adult; he was an adult when he was four and creeping across the house on silent feet to steal crackers from the pantry because mom forgot to feed him; he was an adult when he was 10 and forging his mothers signature on school papers, and making excuses for why she couldn’t come into parent-teacher conference night; he was an adult when he was sitting across from his reflection in a juvenile detention facility, and promised protection. One more birthday doesn’t mean shit.

(Andrew agrees. He, too, has been an adult for as long as he can remember.)

((Still, when Nicky slips cards under each of their doors wishing them a happy birthday and telling them he’s proud of them, and that he hopes that adulthood treats them right, well. If Aaron squeezes his eyes shut as hard as he can to prevent the tears from escaping, and if Andrew tares it up into a million pieces because it almost makes him feel something, then no one needs to know))

vi

It is November 4th, and the newly-coined monsters are in Columbia, just like they are most weekends. They make the same stops as always, go to the same club, the same restaurant. 

Never once is the word birthday mentioned.

vii

It is Andrew’s 20th birthday and he is about to make one of the worst mistakes of his life. For now, he sits against the windowsill, watching his smoke dissipate into the afternoon air, absently listening to the sounds of Nicky and Aaron’s video game wash over him. He’s grinning, as is usually is these days, and if he was capable of having a long-lasting coherent thought, he would want to carve that grin off his face.

Alas, he is not capable of long-lasting coherent thought. Oh well. Perhaps it’s for the best.

Renee got him a gift. Silly Renee. Always so nice, so kind, even to monsters like him. Hasn’t she learned better than that by now? It seems not.

When Nicky receives a phone call that leaves him in a panic, it is almost enough to garner Andrew’s attention. 

Almost.

When he leaves the room in a rush only to come beach with Neil, the enigma, the hallucination, the rabbit, in tow behind him, Andrew actually does start to pay attention. Only a little though. 

When Neil pulls him aside, and asks for the unimaginable, and then manages to make it seem like a good idea, well. Andrew’s interest has been peaked, and he agrees. Why not? It might be fun. Might be, might be, might be.

(It’s not. It’s not fun at all, and if nothing else then Andrew is finally allowed to leave that smile behind for good. Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday dear Andrew, happy birthday to me!)

((Aaron spends his birthday playing video games and wondering why the new kid holds such sway over his brother. When he looks back on that day, he will not remember any of that. He will only remember that that was the day everything went wrong, and he was unable to fix it.))

viii

It is Andrew’s 21st birthday, and it might just be a good one. No alarm wakes him up in the morning, even though he’s sure he set it last night, meaning he gets to sleep in. When he wakes up it’s to Neil bustling about the dorm room, clearly searching for something.

“Practice?” Andrew asks and is told in no uncertain terms that they will be blowing it off for the day. Yes, today is shaping up to be a good one.

Instead, they go out driving, blazing down empty roads as fast as the mas will take them, eating up millage and gas money and caring at all. Neil rolls down the window and lets out victorious whoops into the still afternoon, the wind flushing his cheeks and tousling his hair. Andrew almost thinks something disgustingly sappy about that but is able to rain in his own brain just in time. 

They got greasy diner food for lunch, and Andrew orders a massive ice cream Sunday that Neil doesn’t comment on. They go back to Fox Tower and lounge around their dorm, kissing and smoking and playing video games. They have pancakes for dinner, and Kevin doesn’t bother them once about going to tonight’s practice. Andrew goes to bed full and sated, and almost, almost, happy. It’s a good birthday.

((the next day at therapy, Aaron complains that he didn’t get to skip practice yesterday. Andrew shrugs and says that he should take notes for next year. It’s almost an invitation. Almost, but not quite.))

ix

It is Aarons’s 22nd birthday, and he takes a leaf out of Andrew’s book and skips practice. He and Katelyn drive into town, and walk up and down the streets, popping into stores at random and picking out delightfully ugly things for the other to buy. In one shop, Katelyn shows Aaron a shirt made from a disgusting green fabric with the gaudiest floral pattern he’s ever seen. In another, Aaron finds shimmering, sparkle filled pink and purple shoes with a six-inch heel. They both nearly get sick from laughing. That night, they go out to the fanciest restaurant they can afford and get wine drunk. Aaron tells Katelyn that he loves her, which is something that he’s told her a million times before, but that doesn’t stop it from mattering. This will always matter. She will always matter. He looks at her, just looks at her, and thinks about how lucky he is to have this. And he thinks about Andrew, just for a second, curses him for keeping her from Aaron. But then, for an even shorter second, the thought occurs to him. I hope he’s as happy right now with Neil as I am with her. 

((Andrew may not show it the same way, but he is. He is.))

x

It is their 25 birthday now (which it longer than either of them thought they would live), and after years of therapy and working through their issues, Aaron has decided once again that he wants a brother. And so he books a flight to Boston, and buys a ticket to Andrews game, and watches his brother play exy on their birthday. Their birthday. Sometimes he still forgets that they are a “they” now. He'll still say my birthday, my mom, my cousin, my family. But it's not just his, and so he meets Andrew at the player’s exit after the game and forces him to go to dinner with him. And they spend their birthday together, just the two of them, for the first time since they were born. And its-

Well, it’s not bad. It's kind of nice, actually. Stilted, at first, and undoubtedly awkward, but. 

But they’re still brothers, even after everything. They share family and history and most of their DNA, so it seems right that they also share a dinner. And they talk, about Andrew’s pro team and Aarons residency, and about halfway through Aaron realizes that even though he was the one who forced this, Andrew isn’t trying to stop it. He came with him to dinner, and he’s talked more in the last hour then Aaron thinks he ever has before, and Aaron realizes that he wants this too. Andrew wants a brother too. They part ways outside - Andrew doesn’t offer to drive him back to his hotel or to let him stay at his apartment, but that’s ok.

Because Andrew wants this too. 

Andrew wants this too.

epilogue 

It is the Minyard twins’ 34th birthday, and as has become a tradition they are each awoken by a phone call from Nicky. Aaron only grumbles for a moment before Katelyn is handing his phone to him and he’s picking up. Andrew takes longer, turning over and burying his face in Neil’s neck for a second or a minute or a year, before finally grabbing his phone. To be fair, it’s about 2 hours earlier for him than for his brother. When he was younger he would hang up, and Nicky would call back, and he’d hang up again, until around the third call when he would finally give in and answer and phone. He doesn’t hang up anymore. He supposes that he’s grown. It’s a facetime call, so he’s greeted with Nicky’s over-enthusiastic smile and Aarons bedhead that looks so much like his own. He props himself up on some pillows so that he’s nearly in a sitting position, and gives a halfhearted wave. Beside him, Neil stays lying down, curling himself into Andrew’s side. Andrew absently starts carding his fingers through his hair. Nicky starts to talk, telling them about the business, and the adoption process, and the cute thing that his and Erik’s dog did. King jumps up onto Andrew’s chest, and then there’s a lot of cooing over how cute she is. She starts to lick at Andrew’s temple, which makes everyone laugh and Andrew rolls his eyes. It’s ok. He doesn’t really mind. Aaron talks about the hospital, and then his toddler (who is really more of a kid now, she’s getting so big holy shit) bursts into the room, climbing up onto the bed. She says hi to her Uncle Andy (Neil taught her to say that when she was a baby, and it tuck. Again, Andrew doesn’t really mind) and Uncle Neil, and her cousins Nicky and Erik. they talk more, Andrew waking up and partaking in the conversion, occasionally mouthing things to Neil in Russian to make him laugh. He loves it when Neil laughs (he’s not so concerned with not thinking sappy things anymore).

It’s a good start to a good day. They order take out and eat it on the floor, just like they do every year. Neil gets him a cake, and he sings happy birthday, just like they do every year. 

A plane ride away, Aaron and Katelyn hire a babysitter and go out to dinner, just like they do every year. Katelyn gets him a loudly collared tie, just like she does every year.

It’s a good day for both boys (who are now much closer to men), but more than that, it is a good day for both brothers. For that is undoubtedly what they are now. Brothers. 

That night, they both get a text from Betsy. It says Happy birthday, my lovely boys. I hope this year treats you well. 

And then it does.

It does.

thanks for reading! if you reblog i’ll love you forever :)

[isuspectyouhavefantheories]

Search for the Sun 🌞

So this is Part 2 of “the Sun” series.

Part 1 found : https://isuspectyouhavefantheories.tumblr.com/post/640838971892662272/the-crossroads-to-the-sun here!

Ok so, NSFW, I can’t figure out how to make this appear shorter or have it appear under the cut cus mobile Tumblr sucks eggs. You heard me.

Takemura/Female V fic

Rated MA, for mature, sexual themes, read at own risk.

—————————————-

Somewhere in the Mojave....

“We need a new carburettor for this thing V and someone’s gonna have to re-solder this whole board before we can even do that! We aren’t going to be getting our cargo vans very far like.” Saul sighed, closing the hood of the large van with a heavy thud as he wiped the grease and dust from his hands. His expression was his usual deeply worried frown and she noticed how even as he wiped his hands clean they remained oil stained and grubby. He’d been toiling over engines all day, putting one fire out after another.

“I’ll see what Mitch and I can do but it’s gonna take a little while. We’re already trying to get a handle on repairs to the solar panels and honestly that’s the thing I want to make sure we have fixed before night fall. We can stop for the night, recuperate.” She gave him a pointed look that he only waived off. “I’ll fix up the vans in the morning and we can get going after. We have some time before the next storm, quit your worrying.” V offered, punching his arm lightly, Saul only smiled in return.

“How’d you end up being my second in command? I thought that was supposed to be Panam?” He chuckled.

“She’s got her hands full at the moment.”

“With?”

“Dick.”

Saul balked at her and V only waggled her eyebrows, nodding her head in the direction of a lightly rocking AV on the outskirts of camp.

“Incidentally, his name is also Dick.” She chuckled.

“God damnit, PANAM!” She watched in mild amusement as Saul stormed away toward the aforementioned vehicle to reprimand his second for her blatant public fornication. So she heaved herself forward, ignoring the mild ache in her body and forcing her legs and arms to continue obeying her. V decided that she would save herself the mental anguish of tangling with the solar grid and get out of camp for an hour at the least. Evidently fighting burning migraines and muscle spasms was trying at the best of times, especially when attempting to keep up with her duties to the clan.

She didn’t want to sit around and be a burden on them, regardless of Saul and Panam’s insistence on her getting more rest. In truth, she loathed inactivity, too much time to start thinking, or worse, listening to Johnny, who was still holding out the hope she was going to turn the clan around and storm Mikoshi instead of this slow shicide she had carved out for herself instead. The twilight hours were the worst, because there was nothing she could do, hours she had spent staring at her tent roof, only to give up and lay under the stars, at least then she had something to occupy her. It had been especially hard the last few nights and she had more than once woken to Saul staring down at her with a worried look she would wave off and tell him that really, she was fine, dusting the sand from her and continuing on with her day at camp.

She admired the location for what it was, they had chosen a decent spot for the camp and they had some useful vantage points. Any Raffen trying to get the jump on them would be in for a surprise, they’d see their asses a mile wide.

She pulled Evelyn’s cigarette case from her utility belt pocket, igniting it with a match she then shook out to extinguish as she breathed a long drag.

“Fuuuck.” Johnny groaned appreciatively.

“You’re welcome.” She laughed as she gazed at the expanse of the desert. It’s wild beauty marred by burnt out car wrecks and pile upon pile of garbage. Her eyes landed on yet another old ruined petrol station. She couldn’t help but let her mind wander back to the week previous. Her night with Takemura had been everything to her. Laying there in his arms, basking in the beautiful aftermath listening to him breath as he slept, watching the steady rise and fall of his partially plated chest. She had wanted nothing more in the world than to just stay there in that abandoned truck stop, for the rest of their lives they could be there and she’d have been the happiest woman alive. But as she stared down at his sleeping face she knew she was living a pipe dream.

He was loyal to the bone to Arasaka. She would never be enough, she could never pry those chains from him. Even knowing what she had told him, about Hanako and Saburo, she imagined he had dusted himself off the next morning and returned to his master tail between his legs like the well trained guard dog they made him into. Why wait until morning to watch him fumble and ruin a perfectly good fuck, one for the history books, by seeing him slink back to the clutches of the Emperor’s family? Just to feel the raw sting of his departure, the rejection in his blind obedience to the people that saw him only as a pawn to be played. No. She decided to rip the proverbial band aid off. She was a quiet and stealthy thief, expertly manoeuvring around him in silence and then pushing her thorton far enough out of ear shot from him then just... driving away. She had to admit, it was shitty. To just leave him there without so much as a goodbye. But she knew if she had waited it would have been another day of trying to convince him to let her go.

Or he might have even managed to convince you to go back to Arasaka.

Johnny’s interjection to her train of thought startled her and she watched him materialise, cigarette in hand, perching with his legs dangling from a delapidated hoodoo rock a few yards in front of her.

“I wouldn’t have gone with him Johnny. I wasn’t going to just let them shred you into bits, fuck man, gotta give me more credit than that.” She was annoyed he could even insinuate such a thing, especially given where they now stood.

“You didn’t take your blockers during your little roll around with Mr Miyagi.” He groaned and her cheeks immediately flushed a deep crimson. “I know you were thinking it for a moment there in the... aftermath.” He sighed, looking down at her from his perch.

He took off his aviators and pursed his lips as if he was about to say something pivotal to the narrative but more than likely just as irritating as his previous comment so he decidedly closed his mouth, thinking better of it and returning his gaze to the endless desert plains. The fact that she could read him so well now was not lost on her.

“I wasn’t going to let them hurt you. Believe it or not you’re my friend, Johnny.” He glanced down at her again and a smile attempted to tug at the corner of his lips but he put his shades back on and coughed into his closed fist to cover it up.

“Well thanks. I guess. Doesn’t matter now anyway. We’re done for as is I suppose.” He breathed out a plume of holographic smoke that seemed to float off into the desert. “But you’re still thinking about him.” He deadpanned, making her sigh in irritation.

“Look.. it just kills me because... Goro was my friend too. And now he’s...” she smoothed her hair back from her face, letting her hand slide to the nape of her neck and head drooping down to look at her weathered and scuffed steel toe boots, her tool belt slung across her hips, held together by the tied sleeves of her blue net running jumpsuit she had to wear half down due to being in the beating sun while working all day. She could see her skin was already blistered with another light sunburn but also some sun freckles newly blooming. Her hands, more calloused and rough now than in her entire career as an amateur merc. She frowned. “I don’t know. It doesn’t matter. I’m here now Johnny. I know that I shouldn’t keep living in the past but... let me at least mourn. Please?”

“Alright, alright. I get it. Here, just take some advice from a guy who’s had to... leave behind a few broken hearts in his day. Get drunk. Get fucked. Get angry. Get over it. Always worked for me anyhow.” She rolled her eyes at the rocker boy, letting her hand fall to her side, taking the last drag of her cigarette wasn’t even appealing to her so she quickly flicked it away.

“Aw.” Johnny grumbled. “The cherry is the best bit!” He whined but she ignored him. V made to turn back to the camp but some faint movement along the horizon caught her eye. She pulled out her binoculars and got as close as she could to the slightly glimmering and fast approaching object. Upon closer inspection she realised it was a car. And not just any car.

His car.

She froze, glued to the vehicle rapidly approaching the camp.

What the fuck does he think he’s doing?

-———

He admitted to a small amount of apprehension about this move to approach head on as he pulled up alongside the Basilisk, giving it a long stare and praying silently to whatever gods were out there watching over him that he had found the right Nomad camp this time. He had already had to blast his way out of two raffen pits as of yesterday and wasn’t thrilled about the possibility of having to do so again.

A tap on his car window brought him from his thoughts and he rolled it down.

“What brings you here, friend?” Mitch asked, Saul and Panam on the sidelines, iron at the ready.

“I apologise for the intrusion. I mean you no harm, I am simply attempting to locate someone. A friend.” He explained.

“Who’s your friend?” Saul called after him.

“Her name is V.” The Nomads grew quiet, looking between each other. “Perhaps she has passed by here? Stopped for supplies?”

“Excuse me?” Panam sputtered.

“V doesn’t have ties to Arasaka anymore. Suggest you move on.” Saul moved closer to the car window, pushing past Mitch.

He leaned his arm against the top of the car door frame, letting his revolver rest against it in a menacing if threatening show of dominance. This here was the Aldecaldos stomping ground. And he’d be dead in the ground before he let some corpo asshole get their hands on V. Takemura’s eyes hardened a moment on the large nomad, his hands righting on the wheel now as he internally scanned the area with what limited tech he still had to work with. She searched for her signature but either his implants were all now truly offline or she wasn’t here.

“I am not with Arasaka.” Takemura thought he would feel pain at uttering those words, but if anything, each word made him feel lighter.

“Yeah sure. Just covered in Arasaka cyberware, driving around on Arasaka wheels, wearing a full on uniform for their security detail. Totally.” Panam quipped.

Takemura sighed.

“Anymore.” He amended, but the trio still eyed him sceptically, he felt it best he stayed in the car for now.

“Is she here?” He questioned, quickly surveying the camp to try and find her himself, a small kernel of hope planting in his chest as he looked through the small crowd that had gathered by them, hopeful to catch a glimpse of her but Saul’s hand reached out for him roughly, pulling him up to the open window by the front of his shirt with a resounding clunk.

“I don’t know what you’re playing at here but if you think for a second I’m just gonna let you-.”

“Saul. Stop. It’s cool.” Takemura’s head whipped over Saul’s shoulder to the source of the voice. His heart clenched painfully upon seeing V finally.

She was a vision. Almost like a beautiful mirage that had been conjured up by the desert heat and his possible dehydration but upon closer inspection he knew it had to be her. Her every freckle and scar burned into his memory, he would know here anywhere, even caked in soot and sand.

“V, come on, we don’t even know if he’s got people tailing him. We’ve already got our hands full with Militech for Christ’s sake, let’s not go adding to that pile.” Saul glared down, unconvinced by Takemura’s own words.

“I wouldn’t be saying this if I thought he was a danger. He’s not. Please just let me talk to him.” Saul groaned but he made the mistake of meeting her gaze and knew there was no telling her no so he released Goro and opened the door to the car.

“Out. Follow her.” Saul grumbled, hand still leaning against the top of the door, but before Takemura could step out funny a strong hand clamped down on his shoulder. “Try and pull any funny shit though and I’ll drop your ass myself. No hesitation.” Takemura hadn’t realised just how big Saul was before but did not let that deter him.

“I will be sure to keep it in mind.” Goro responded in an uninterested tone, not really registering him, only focusing on V, before quickly making his way to her side. He reached out for her but she had already turned away and was walking up to a trailer, ascending a small flight of stairs before reaching the screen door. She threw him a look over her shoulder and motioned with her head for him to follow.

—————-

Once inside the privacy of the trailer V rounded on him, her eyes filled with confusion and anger.

“What the fuck, Goro?” She hissed. “Why are you here?”

He swallowed thickly, never realising that even through all his fighting to get back to her side, he had never even put his reasoning into words. And he had always had a defined reason for everything he did, it was something he was fucking known for. But now, standing here he couldn’t even begin to rationalise any of his actions, only that being here now already felt more right than anything in his life ever had. He opened and closed his mouth like a gaping fish. She noticed his silence but was quickly distracted by his haggard appearance. Her eyes widened however at the lack of the dim lights on his cybernetics.

She reached for him cautiously, her fingertips brushing against the red outer wiring of his throat that no longer glowed with the hum of electronics and now simply shined in the dim light, essentially now just useless plastic.

“Your implants...” she whispered, tracing her finger down the line of the metal overlay of his neck and to the edge of his jaw, Goro watching her every motion with laser focus. “Why are they..?”

“They were deactivated when I failed to return a few days ago.” he wanted to reach for her, to touch her, that’s all he’s thought about day and night since she left him. “I was starting to think I was going to die out there before I found you.” He chuckled softly yet he inwardly savoured how close she was, her scent, near unchanged since their night together. The scent was now infused with a small background of motor oil now that clingged to her hands but it was strangely fitting for her.

“Why?” She whispered angrily at him, her eyes burning with unshed tears.

He raised his own hand now to weave with hers, holding it to his heart as he stared down at her with so much sureness, so much care and devotion that she felt unworthy.

“I defected, V.” Her eyes widened at him but still she said nothing. “I am... I can’t go back. If you only have a short time left, then... there isn’t anywhere else I want to be. I want to be here with you, I don’t want to miss a second of you ever again. I-.” He closed his eyes, terrified to see her reaction but was nearly sent spinning as she thrust herself without warning at him, her arms suddenly wrapping around his shoulders. His own arms instinctively wrapped around her, returning the embrace yet part of him still feared the worst.

Did she pity him? Is that why she said nothing? Was this her letting him down gently? She was always too kind for her own good.

“Goro... oh my god.” She breathed against him and he tightened his grip around her burying his face in her neck, breathing her in deeply. Feelings of peace, serenity, a meaning in his life he had been searching for ever since he escaped the slaughter house of Chiba-11. He thought that meaning was to serve those who had uplifted him from that barbaric place. But they didn’t save him. They used him.

It was this tiny trembling powerhouse of a woman that barrel assed her way into his life and irrevocably entangled herself with him, she had been the one who reignited his purpose. Opened his eyes and never lied to him. She had never left him behind. Only when she thought he was truly beyond her reach did she finally resign herself to letting him go.

But now, in the security of her arms, he knew he was never going to let that happen again.

“I can’t believe I finally found you...” he breathed, letting the feeling of her arms around him be engraved deeply in his heart, the lines on his face began slowly relaxing as he stroked the dip of her back gently.

V finally looked up at him and he swiped away some stray tears from her slightly flushed cheeks with a curled finger before caressing them in his hand fully. He stared down at her with an adoration she had never imagined him capable of, it felt to her as though she had never been truly seen before now and could only grasp his outstretched arm and reach for the back of his head pulling his face closer to hers when he finally moved forward, reuniting her lips with his in a passionate kiss. Her fingertips grazed over his jaw lightly, drawing a sigh from him and letting it meld into the kiss as he tried desperately to hold her closer.

She pulled back from him but his lips trailed after hers again, loathed to be parted from her just yet, but she placed two fingers on his lips to halt his pursuit and worry shot through him again.

“I think we should explain to the clan before Saul comes in here and decks you.” She chuckled, reaching up to kiss him on the cheek sweetly and he leaned into her touch, the sudden panic receeding, before smiling back at her and nodding. She made to move to the door, hand already pulling the handle open when his own grasped her free one and interlaced their fingers, grinning like a cat down at her.

“So they don’t shoot me on sight.” He joked, V could only huff lightly but her own smirk betrayed her feigned annoyance.

“Hush. Be nice.” She snipped.

They stepped out of the trailer and at the bottom of the stairs to the trailer was the holy Aldecaldos trinity themselves. Panam looked between the two and their interlock hands with mild confusion first before realisation dawned on her and she mouthed ‘that’s him?’ rather more obviously than she thought she had but never the less winked at friend.

Goro looked down at her curiously but V just shook her head.

“She’ll tell you herself at some point.” V whispered, leaving him far more confounded than before.

“So? What’s this about?” Saul stood in front of them now arms crossed but glaring heatedly at Takemura.

“Drop the tough guy act Saul come on.” She shoved him playfully but Saul only scowled deeper. “He defected.” Saul’s eyebrows rose in surprise for a moment but suspicion reaffirmed itself at the forefront of his mind once more.

“Bullshit.” Saul spat.

“I left Arasaka because I no longer believe in them.” He looked down at V’s hand in his and gave her a reassuring squeeze. “I believe in V. And she has put her trust in you and your clan. I wish to stay with her. You know that... she does not have long.” She squeezed him

back at this, hearing the slight waiver in his voice at that but he continued. “I will work, I will do whatever is needed of me in order to stay by her side.” He bowed his head politely and Saul was at a loss for words, casting his gaze back to Panam and Mitch but only receiving a tired sigh and a shrug from Mitch and a rather heated scowl from Panam that said ‘if you don’t let the ninja stay I’m going go get an emp and blast an AV out of the sky again’, and Saul could only sigh tiredly. He rubbed his forehead with the heel of his palm in a gesture of defeat but his eyes spoke an understanding and no inherent objection to the arrangement.

“Alright. You work, like the rest of us. We all pull our own weight here and there’s plenty to do.” Panam fist pumped in the air and squealed with glee, making V laugh at her antics but Saul gave her an exhausted look before grinning devilishly. “ Since there’s another mouth to feed and person to arm, we’re gonna need to do a recount on inventory. Thanks for offering to do it Panam.” Saul rounded on his heel, making for his own tent as the orange pink swash of dusk settled over the desert. Mitch followed after while Panam gave her a quick pat on the shoulder before departing to her new hell, inventory.

“Look at you guys, just the picturesque happy couple living on the edge of the law, running with nomads, being all in love and shit. Warms my cold dead pixilated heart.” Johnny drawled as he leaned up against the trailer.

V chose to ignore him but grinned Takemura wrapped his free arm around her and rested his head atop hers as he rubbed loving circles into the small of her back, she sighed into his chest and grinned like a fool. Nothing was going to bring her mood down. Not raffen, not Johnny, not the broken to shit solar panels.

She groaned suddenly at the memory of her ever growing list of chores left.

“V?” He questioned, straining his neck down to see her.

“Fucking solar grid.” She hissed ruefully into his shoulder before pulling away.

“I’ve got some solar panels to fix and a carburettor to solder before the day is over.” She groaned, but Takemura squeezed her reassuringly.

“Lead the way.” He chuckled.

“You want to help?” She asked incredulously.

He brushed his hand through her soft chocolate brown coloured locks, twirling the tail ends around her shoulders between his thumb and index. He had a feeling his new unconscious obsession was going to be her hair.

“I’m going to have to learn aren’t I?” He chuckled. “And I have a feeling I’m going to like being your student. Lead on, sensei.”

She giggled before pulling away from him, hands still interlaced as she tugged him towards the solar panels on the far side of camp.

—————

“Welcome to solar grid maintenance 101, class is in session.” She announced.

Goro sat on a rock beside the van, next to the start of the solar grid that went from the back of the van to the further reaches of the edge of their camp, with a small group of four guarding the grid perimeter at all times. He noticed a few of them giving him wary or curious looks but did his best to ignore them. He was sure in time he would seem less threatening but he knew he would only achieve this through time, example and not relying only on shows of good faith. He leaned forward, arms resting against his knees, watching as she peeled back a flexible plastic covering over the front of the panel, uncovering a plated and wired grid he assumed is what absorbed power from the Sun.

“Ok, so. You need a fully wired and calibrated solar panel, batteries, a charge controller and an inverter.” She gestured to each item in front of her. “Once you have these it’s just a matter of following instructions. Then you gotta figure out what your output is gonna be, simply calculate watt hours by using each of the electric tools and machinery’s power ratings, multiplied by the time in hours it will be running...” He continued to listen to her intently, taking mental notes as she went on and was pleasantly surprised by how much she knew. The woman was practically a walking, talking encyclopaedia for off grid living.

He imagined she had learned this with her original nomad clan.

“And... vóila!” The grid hummed to life, the electrical tickering and slight glow from the panels confirmed this. “And tomorrow you’re gonna help me dismantle, clean and stow them.” She slowly rose from her kneeling position but wobbled a bit, Takemura’s lightning fast reflexes kicked into action and he reached out to stabilise her. She gave him a sheepish yet thankful smile.

“Are you-?”

“Just light headed, I stood up to fast.” His levelled gaze cut through her, narrowed eyes studying her intently. “And we’ve been sitting in the sun for an hour. I’d say I could go for something to eat though. Haven’t had anything since last night come to think of it.” She pulled away, attempting to move away from the subject of her health as quickly as she could, but her hand stayed resting open palmed against his chest as she stared almost through him. She still couldn’t believe he was here. Standing next to her in the flesh. She couldn’t even really fathom eating right now but she knew she had to at least try to keep her strength up. But fucking damn. Of all the ways this day was going to go, this was certainly not one of them, not that she was complaining.

His finger captured her chin and tilted her gaze to his, pulling her from her thoughts as if he could sense her inner turmoil.

“What is the expression, ‘I am here for the...’ ah.” He looked up to think an moment as if the phrase was written in the sky before seemingly finding it among the clouds and looking back down at her, grinning from ear to ear. “‘I am... ‘In this for the long haul’, as you say.” She snorted a laugh at him letting her head fall foreword against him as he pulled her further into his embrace. “So stop looking at me as if I’m going to suddenly disappear.” Her fingers squeezed his in response and she looked up resting her chin on his shoulder now.

“Promise?” She whispered, making his chest rumble in laughter.

“Yakusoku.” He affirmed before kissing her forehead loving.

————————————

They had eaten their fill of some synth beef chilli at the camps mess tent and Goro wasn’t about to disclose how much he had actually enjoyed the hot meal. Wandering around in the desert for a week he had been living off of whatever least expired protein bars and soda cans he could find, which had been almost as awful as the scop burgers and noodles in night city, but at least they had been some way warm.

They had made their way to V’s tent which was set up next to her Thorton and some work benches and a trailer with two bikes standing in it. He recognise one to be her beloved Arch and the other a gold and silver heavy terrain 700cc bike with the clans name spray painted boldly along the side of it.

“Here we are. Home sweet home I guess. For now.” She sighed, flopping down into her large sleeping cot with a heavy plop. Takemura stood awkwardly for a moment before fastening the entrance flap closed. There was a fold up chair and two electric lamps illuminating the small space. He suddenly felt out of place but V was quick to pick up on his uncharacteristic fidgeting, giving him an inquisitive glance.

“Cot’s a bit small but we can manage for tonight. Or there’s another cot in storage we can go and-.” Takemura shook his head.

“We can manage.” He grinned sheepishly and she giggled at him, taking a seat on the edge of the cot, patting the spot next to her as an invitation to join her. He took two long strides and he was at her side once again, his hand snaking around her waist as he leaned his head gently on her shoulder. Leaning into him, V interlaced their free hands together, marvelling at how well they fit together.

“You must be exhausted.” She sighed, extending her hand to his face where she swiped away a errant few strands of silver hair that escaped his otherwise well kept topknot, her cool fingers a welcome sensation against his forehead.

“Not really.” He stifled a yawn and she looked up at him pointedly, his own gaze eluding her.

“Evidently.” She chuckled, but a sudden flash of inspiration hit her and she grinned up at him.

“What are you doing?” He asked warily as she began to slink herself around to kneel in front of him, her hands running up and down his thighs in a firm yet teasing trail.

“Well we do have a lot to do in the morning and you require a good nights sleep for what’s coming.” He eyed her suspiciously but couldn’t help the small grin threatening to tug at the corner of his lips. “Couldn’t possibly let you lie awake all night and screw yourself over tomorrow.” She ran her hand over the growing bulge at the apex of his legs, which he opened wider as she settled between them.

“V...” he breathed his head beginning to loll back and eyes flutter closed, his breath hitching she she unzipped him and pulled him of the confines of his suit pants, his member springing free, already fully hard. She gave him some light pumps, enclosing her fist around as much of him as she could. He wasn’t a monster in size, but impressive.

“Speaking of impressive cocks.” Johnny’s voice pierced her mind and she wanted to scream. “Can we leave mine out of this. Please, if yourself gonna fuck the corpo grandpa just take a fucking omega blocker so I don’t have to as well.” She shook her head and sighed, pulling away from Goro.

His eyes fluttered open.

“Is something wrong?” He breathed.

“Just gotta take something before I forget.” She smiled back at him reassuringly before popping two of the red pills.

She turned back to him and something about seeing him sitting there, disheveled clothes, cock standing to attention, lips parted and panting lightly in anticipation, sent a rush of some indescribable feeling through her system. He watched her hungrily but patient in his pining, she couldn’t help the heat between her own legs beginning to rise. She locked their gaze, lips still curved into her signature teasing grin and she began to pull off her tank top painfully slowly, dragging it up to her chest. He watched her relieve her body of the sweat and dirt stained cloth throwing it over her head and groaned lowly when he saw she wasn’t wearing anything underneath save for her tattooed flesh. Lotus flowers bloomed colourfully at her shoulders, and just between her pert little breasts. He traced them with his eyes and felt his body tense in suspense as she saunter toward him, a sultry sway in her hips saying she knew exactly what she was doing to him. She sank down to her knees again before him, her fingers wrapping around his still hard manhood making him hiss at the contact before a strangled gasp tore from his throat as she resumed pumping him again. He reached out his hand to touch her but she slapped him away lightly.

“Ah, ah, ah.” She wagged her finger tauntingly at him, then running them down his chest back down to curl back around his member, giving him a tug that made him groan once more. “Look. Don’t touch.” She then began to lower her lips to him, his eyes nearly rolling to the back of his head as she encased him in her warm pink lips, her devilish tongue flicking along the sensitive underside of his cock. He moaned louder as she moved against him but forced his hand over his mouth to stifle himself. They weren’t alone out here so he had to remember to control his vocalisations but she was not making it easy.

He leaned back further down on his elbows watching her intently through hooded eyes as she devoured him, her mouth sinking down slowly, taking him all the way to the hilt letting him hit the back of her throat with an audible gag that made him whine in need then gliding back up, dragging her lips back to the tip, letting her tongue swirl around him a few times before swallowing him once again. He struggled against his urge to fist his hands into her hair as she kept up her ministrations, fearing she’d stop what she was doing, because what she was doing was so fucking good he thought he was going to die if she didn’t finish.

“V... please I’m going to....” he gasped, one hand stretched out behind him as he bit the knuckle of his other hand to surpress his cries.

He felt her chuckle against him, his end so close he could practically taste it as she continued to bob energetically against him. A few more pumps and he had to bite his knuckle so hard he drew blood so as not to roar from the force of his climax, blowing his load in her mouth which she swallowed it readily. He swore he saw stars for a moment, a blinding light show all of his own as he rode the high for as long as he could until he fell back against the cot, attempting to catch his breath as V released him from her mouth with a faint pop.

She pulled herself up and crawled over him, resting her chin against his chest that now rose and fell erratically from his ragged breathing, waiting there patiently for it to even. He lifted his head to look at her, small beads of sweat clinging to his forehead but a stupidly pleased grin now plastered his face as he lifted a hand to caress her cheek and stroked her cheekbone with the pad of his thumb tenderly. He held her there for a moment, unsure if it was the aftermath of his climax or the low lighting of the tent, but to him, right now in all her dishevelment, she was the most beautiful woman he had ever beheld. He dragged her up to him, lips meeting hers at last, tasting her felt like home, regardless of the lingering taste of himself on her lips. Goro pulled her closer to deepen the kiss before pulling away to gaze at her agin. She was the one panting now, her full pink lips, that had only a few moments been driving him to near insanity were parting enough for him so see her devilishly nimble tongue and the flush dusting her cheeks was starting to do things he didn’t know could be done, his member already twitching to life again, slowly but surely.

“You feeling more relaxed then?” Her laugh, like a tinkling bell, brought his attention back into the room and he could only smirk down at her slyly.

“Partially.” He lifted himself up fully wrapping his arms around her then flipping them so she was trapped underneath him. “But I’m afraid I’m more awake now than I was before.” He whispered, lowering his lips to suckled at her collarbone where he began to trail a searing line of bites and kisses down her chest, stopping to tease her nipples as he lavished them thoroughly, leaving her shivering and gasping uncontrollably beneath him. “The opposite of the desired effect I think.” He chuckled lowly, lifting his hand to her mouth and clamping firmly over it to quieten her mewls while he began to drag the fingers of his other hand up to the bottom half of her netrunner jumpsuit. Untying the sleeves he pulled the zipper further down to the end. It reached just above her mound, a few more inches on the zip and he’d have been able to access her. Shame, he though but immediately tugged the skintight nano plastic material down over her hips, her purple thong coming with it. He didn’t pull it all the way down, allowing the material to bunch at her knees before pulling back, letting both her legs stretch up to rest against his shoulder as he stared down at her, a shit eating grin breaking over his lips as he soaked in the sight of her, trapped in his web. She huffed at him in mild displeasure at the loss of control but her eyes widened when she felt his fingers trace her slit softly. His arm curled around her legs, anchoring them against him as he continued to tease her.

“What are you-?” He silenced her with two fingers plunging inside her, making her arch her back as she barely managed to stifle a moan. He thrust his fingers into her wetness again and again, all while his gaze fixed on her face, contorted by pleasure as he took delight in her every twitch and convulsion.

He let another finger enter her, curling them, tickling a sensitive collection of nerves inside her. Her juices dripped down his hand, his attention switching down to where his fingers pumped relentlessly and he felt himself moan at the sight of her absolutely soaking his hand. He felt his cock strain against her thigh but he ignored his growing need. He had work to do. She nearly cried out when he stopped, her eyes finally fluttered open to see him gazing down at her, smirking triumphantly above her.

“Hey.” She pouted, wiggling against him only making him chuckle quietly.

He pulled her legs free finally, tossing the jumpsuit to the far corner of the tent but trailing his hands from the underside of her thighs, to the under side of her ankles, yanking up sharply which pulled her further down the cot so her ass now rested on his lap. Her ground himself against her, his free member brushing against her slit as he draped each of her legs against either shoulder. He leaned foreword her legs stretching to rest nearly by her ears with how flexible she was. Without warning he entered her, both of them gasping quietly. He filled her so completely, V let the feeling wash over her until he began moving at an achingly slow pace. He found purchase at the head of the cot, using it to drive himself harder and harder into her. Reaching up she caressed his head in her hands, his eyes closing at the contact, savouring it, then opening again to see her.

His breath hitched in his throat, not just at the majesty of her wild curls fanned out and framing her so perfectly. Not at her being stretched and splayed out for him, like a cover pin up they used to sneak into the army barracks, back when he did foolish brazen things like that, no. The trust in her eyes. She was letting him take control, letting him take her, however he wanted. She wasn’t scanning the room for the nearest viable exit like she did in every room or so far away in her mind he wondered if she could even hear him above the noise of the engram erasing her. She was right here, willing and ready for him. He wasn’t going to last long, not after already climaxing earlier but he refused to leave her hanging, letting his thumb roll her clit firmly, over and over. He leaned forward to swallow her cries as she came undone beneath him, his own release coming not to far behind her.

He leaned back, letting her legs down on either side of his hips, but stayed connect with her. He leaned back into her, kissing her forehead, her cheeks, her nose then her lips, making her smile sleepily against him.

“You’re still in your clothes.” She taunted against his shoulder as he chuckled.

“It’s hard to think about anything clearly with you around.” He mumbled against her neck.

“Hey, don’t you dare fall asleep on me dickhead.” She snorted, poking him enough to make him groan then move to the side, allowing her to stand up from the cot. She walked over to a duffel bag where she pulled a loose white shirt from and threw it on. The fabric reached her knees and he scoffed at how small she was.

“Oi, no sand in my bed, get those dusters off.” She ordered and he sighed, pulling himself from his bliss to shed his coat and other garments leaving him only in his boxers. He fell back into the cot heavily, rubbing his eyes as a yawn escaped his lips. She rejoined him, crawling and moulding herself into his side while his arms immediately snaked around her as he buried her face into the crook of her neck, V stroking his hair soothingly.

For the first time in what felt like forever, he went to sleep without knowing where he was going to be tomorrow and not caring in the slightest.

[whatdoesshedotothem]

Wednesday 11 September 1839

3 ¼

11

F61 ½° at 4 ¼ am much rain in the night and sandy road .:. 6 horse off at 5 6/.. at Kyrkstad at 6 55/.. I hot and much bit in the night

K- to Bolstad 14 w.

Njölbolstad 13 w.

Helsingfors 68 w.

St. P- 480 w.

the woman had not been able to get us any Swedish money .:. agreed that she should take a 10 Rubel bill and be answerable for 6r. for the horses and take 4 towards her own bill and I paid her (at the rate 40sk. rigs per rubel) for the 2 remaining rubels

7 eight sk. banco notes i.e. 1.5.4+0.2.8 given over – very civil good tempered looking woman – much pleased we were so satisfied – remembered Handbook and his friend very well – said they had given her a small bit of money which she kept for their sake – I happening to have my 3 silver ½ dollar banco silver pieces in my pocket gave her one of them (that has a hole thro’ it) and desired her to keep it for I should ask to see it again sometime – Better rooms and house at Keala [Kealanoja]  last night but better eating here – Rain again and off in the rain at 5 6/.. – I slept most of the way – all forest till 6 55/.. when fine and sunny, and stopt to change horses /4 again) at some distance from the station house (did not even see it) near a small cottage where the red square headed mile post is set up – I got out for a few minutes very usefully the village must be near the station house on our left – scattered farms and cottages about – a pretty opening – very pretty country – wide winding wooded hill enclosed valley – a bit of forest again (young wood) in about hour+ - but good road – sandy land – but the road hard gravel like an English park road about 12ft. wide as usual, but sometimes less nice country all along to Bolstad at 8 ½ - stopt again in the road so[me] distance (left) 200 or 300 yards from the station house – walked to it – to see the direction post – could not find one – poor place – I think we could not well sleep there – the people 2 or 3 men and a woman

SH:7/ML/TR/13/0030

September Wednesday 11 at breakfast a little fish (apparently salted?) and boiled potatoes 2 rigs dollars a ton dearer here than at Stockholm – at last it was agreed that the woman should pay for our 4 horses from here 15 ½ w. to Everby [Ofverby] = 3.72 and the young man (her son?) gave me two 20kop. notes + one 75 kop. + two two-kop. copy pieces + two ½ sk. banco pieces for 4kop. = 5 Rubel – 5 kop. no wonder Handbook complained of their accommodation for the night – that is not the place to stop at – all Finnish commerce with Stockholm .:. all their money payments among themselves are in Swedish money but they are obliged to pay the taxe for posting in Russian money .:. are obliged to receive it for their horses – their wood (salmon) butter all goes to Stockholm but now they have the douane to pay = 2 rigs dollars per 60lbs. and being obliged to sell their butter at the Swedish price as they did before without duty they of course now lose this – and so equally the whole of the duties paid by them to Sweden is now a loss to them – the village of Bolstad not apparently very near the station – nice country – off from B- at 9 2/.. and at 9 ½ pretty lake and unpainted cottages and hamlets dotted here and there – green basin valley and lake and rounded wooded hills – in about 10 minutes more or ¼ hour come down upon the water wood bridge and cross it at one end where it looks river like – very pretty hereabouts rock and wood and water and villages and farms or cottages – a good deal of wind which curly the water – corn cocks as yesterday but now 9 ¾ it is rye – steep pitch up from the bridge and sandy road – at 10 ¼ moss-rocky forest – uphill and our horses hardish passed – all along sandy – pretty country – very pretty drive – at 10 50/.. at next stage to Finns 12 ½ w.

Helsingfors 39 and St. P- 451 w.

Öfverby (pronounced Everby) – small unpainted house – but probably might sleep tho’ not good - but the woman a decent woman – off at 11 – cocks of corn out here – rye I think – very pretty – rocky wooded hills and scattered unpainted little cottages and so red – the village of Ofverby (its neat little church at the foot of the hill just beyond the station) seems

September Wednesday 11 seems widely scattered in patches – winding pretty valley – round hilly and rather sandy – in ¼ hour (11 ¼) foresty again – several of the bare rocks today very white – all granite

the Fins a stupid looking people – here and there a red house but the red seems to bespeak a certain degree of [afflict] – the being better off than common – and here as in N. and S- the [?] (contamine) is growing as a weed among the rocks – we have not seen it as weed elsewhere because the land kept too clean – no weeds seen – now at 11 50/.. another wooded pretty lake right – and A- and I have just had a little of our Keala [Kealanoja] coq du bois that we brought away in paper – very good – many hamlets scattered about today – the country today seems more populous than yesterday? – at Finns at 12 13/..  

to Grahn 14 ½ w.

Helsingfors 26 ½ w.

St. P- 438 ½ w.

might sleep but not perhaps good place for it tho’ the civil woman came to say she could change a 5 Rubel note

nice open country about here wooded in the distance – 2 or 3 cottages near the station house – and large village or two of unpainted houses little distance (left) – rather pitchy last stage and at = off at 12 34/.. from Finns out with a steepitsh pitch from here and then pass thro’ a few houses and over 3 [?] bridges the unpainted cottages very picturesque dotted all round about interspersed  with patches of fir wood and wooded hill and well cultivated vale – now at 12 ¾ a little sun forest light – little pretty vale just below us right green rye and corn in cock (probably rye) not much oats grown in Finland? cottages or barns dotted up and down – fine foresty peopled drive this stage at 1 ¼ unpainted village in the widish basin vale little distance left of road and good yellow house and one or 2 red houses near – all looks well hereabouts – and slow at 1 20/.. descending and at the bottom of hill another pretty little lake near (left) – the openings and rounded dark pine wooded hills very picturesque – much mammelonné [mamelonné] rocky hill and bare and moss covered rock and boulder in our forest and sandy road now at 1 1/2 – here and everywhere much more Scotch fir than Spruce – this forest now at 1 ¾ the best as to size of trees (but none large) we have passed thro’ -

SH:7/ML/TR/13/0031

September Wednesday 11 in Finland – it opens out and we stop at Grahn at 1 57/.. nice little single house on a little [eminence], looking dry and comfortable – I should suppose one might sleep there as well as at Nyby or better? – the wide valley on plain studded with houses, farms, barns – the proportion of red increasing as if to denote our approach to the capital Helsingfors 12w. distance – large [?] beautiful lengthy finely wooded wooded island lake right sweeping along the wide valley – road hilly but tho’ rather sandy, good – forest covered rock alongside (left) – have written, or rubbed out pencilling, or read Handbook (article St. Petersburg) all this morning except added up the whole but 1 or 2 pp. of the Swedish account – since leaving Götheborg [Gothenburg] It seems (vide p. 174. 2nd vol.) that our pastor on board the steamer was M. Edouard de Moralt minster of the reformed church at St. P- and ‘the learned editor of an edition of Minuties’ Felix’ – probably Handbook knows him and sent him his book en cadeau? now at 2 20/.. road very sandy in the forest – at 2 40/.. gentleman’s house right – very pretty – a company of soldiers pass us – forest and break – very pretty – at 2 ¾ pass (close) broad shallow lake – at 2 55/.. Helsingfors church in sight – whitewashed like several other large neighbour buildings – church a fine object – fine looking town with its beautiful fjord – forest and break till now 2 55/.. that we emerge to bare Götheborg-like [Gothenburg] scantly wooded rocky hill – and gardens and houses marking our approach to the capital – at 3 at the water – beautiful view – cross good wood bridge – and at 3 ¼ at the Hotel du Nord – the fine dressed woman who came to us could do nothing – must wait for mademoiselle how should we stay – there was a room au 3me – I got tired of this work and drove off to the society’s house fronting the harbour – settled

September Wednesday 11 there very comfortably at 3 ½ - 2 nice rooms and lodging for the servants at 6 rubels a day – au 3me? but good – ordered dinner at 6 ½ and A- and I out at 4 10/.. – took John – to the botanic garden –

Stymphoricarpus [symphoricarpos] racemosus (snowberry bush) in flower

Vïburnum [Viburnum] Lentago a little like prunus padus but with broader leaf

V- dentatum (leaf something between the hazel and syringa leaf?)

Lonicera caprifolia [caprifolium] (as called by the gardener) the shrub I observed at Åbo with a little orange coloured berry, looking a [specie] of honeysuckle

Populus canescens (white abele)

P. cardifolia

Delphinium.  several specie large beautiful blue flower – a little in the style of aconite – have often seen it in a pot in the window in these northern parts

Lythrum, several specie pretty pink flower in spikes 6 or 8 inch long – narrow leaf – would be pretty (to give colour) at Shibden and hardy enough -  

Asclepias incarata [incarnata] (in flower – pinkish – pretty would do at Shibden)

Phlox several specie pretty little genus-pink and white – in flower like a smooth sweet William – 6 petal flower – the white very common in England gardens

Borago officinalis – pretty blue flower – 5 petals woolly stern and leaves – whatever will do well out of doors here, would do at Shibden – much wind today must be very cold, and exposed in winter – the garden garden divided into small compartments for the flowers, and sheltered by hedges the tall ones of lilac, and acacia, and Norway maple and the low ones of Spiraea calcifolia [salicifolia] – try this hedging plan at Shibden with along the middle a hedge of Spruce firs – or Sycamores? a very pretty hardy looking mespilus? or [?]? with clusters of hawthorn-like (but larger) red haws – Inquire for this –

In returning about 5 ¾ set John at liberty and A- and I sauntered into and about the handsome new not finished church – a Greek cross with 4 Corinthian porticos and pediments – then stood some while listening to the military band and came in at 6 ½ - dinner at 6 ¾ soup, mutton cutlets, sort of

SH:7/ML/TR/13/0032

September Wednesday 11

sweet omlet, and afterwards a sort of roll pancaky thing for dessert – no mead now – too late in the season – had plenty in the summer - .:. had each 2 cups of coffee – then siding had Grotza – then wrote the last page till now 10pm. very fine day – a good deal of wind all day but this afternoon particularly, and particularly here – a very handsome town – fine day F61 ½° now at 10 ½ pm

[xofanfics]

String - Part IV

Prologue | Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V

Genre: angst, fluff, suggestive themes

Pairing: Baekhyun x Female Reader

Word Count: 2.7k

Summary: You find yourself in a friends-with-benefits situation with your best friend. You have no business falling for him, but your heart begs to differ.

Things were not going as planned. That was evident yesterday when Baekhyun paid you a visit.  You felt a bunch of things—annoyance, anger, frustration, sadness. The list went on and your friends could see it in your face. Earlier that week, Evie and Sadie had invited you to sleepover at their dorm for Friday night. Though you hadn’t expected the week to go the way it had, you were grateful that you’d be spending your Friday night with friends instead of in bed eating easy mac and binge watching Vampire Diaries. 

As you sat on the train with your overnight bag, you couldn’t help but feel a little excited. You hadn’t had a girls’ night in a while. For the most part, you usually went out with the guys. This weekend though, you would be with the girls and the girls only. You needed a break. They promised drinks, music and movies in their dorm room. 

The train screeched to a halt as you arrived at 14th Street - Union Square station. You got off the train quickly as a woman nearly knocked you over just to get onto the train. If it was one thing that annoyed you about New York City, it was people like that woman who, for some reason, can’t seem to wait for people to actually get off of the train. People like her give the city a bad name. The station was crowded now; you saw people dressed up and ready to start drinking, you saw people in suits coming from work after a long day at the office, and you saw kids in uniforms in clusters with their friends.

The city always came alive at night as the sun was setting. As you passed the park you saw some street performers playing instruments, the sound of smooth jazz filling your ears. The walk to your friend’s dorm seemed to go more quickly than usual. You were excited to spend time with your friends but you were also disappointed how things went with Baekhyun. He texted you earlier today but you ignored his message and left it on read. You didn’t know how to respond to him after the other night. You stared at the message, unsure of how to react. He said: 

[7:48am] Morning! Sorry I had to leave last night. I’m on my way to the pool now. Hope you have a good day! 

You couldn’t respond to him because you didn’t know how and also because you didn’t know where your fingers would take you if you started typing. It was better, you decided, to ignore the message altogether. 

You signed in at their dorm and waited for Evie to pick you up from the lobby. She came a moment later. “Hey,” she said, waving at the person at the desk as you headed upstairs with her. “We ordered some Chinese food. We timed it perfectly cause it’ll be here in a few minutes.”

“What did we get?”

“Some dumplings, beef and scallions, general tso’s chicken, and shrimp fried rice.”

“That sounds like more than enough,” you said, laughing, as Evie opened the door to their suite. You put your bags down and hugged Sadie. “Hey.”

“So I had nothing else better to do so I put together some fun ideas for tonight,” she said, showing you her phone. “We’re gonna play some drinking games after we eat. Our suitemates are down to play uno and jenga. It’s gonna be great.” She held up a familiar vape pen with the oil that would lead you on a winding, neverending path up to the clouds, if not further. “Want a hit?”

*

You shrieked as you pulled out the wooden piece that sent everything crashing down to the floor. “Damn it!” You and your friends laughed, along with their suitemates. It was time to take a shot. You weren’t sure how many shots you’d had at this point since you and your friends agreed to do half shots so no one would get too drunk and result in the night ending with someone passed out in a corner or slumped at the table. 

Vodka was never good but it was cheap and good enough to get you drunk quickly. Everyone chipped in to get a bottle of Pinnacle earlier. You took the shot, feeling the liquid fire in your core, your friends cheering in the background.

This was what you needed: a night to take your mind off of things. No boys, no drama, just fun and games. You hadn’t thought about Baekhyun once since you got here. Maybe, in your own way, this just served as a distraction to the reality that you had absolutely no idea what was going on in your life but it was fine. As of now, it was fine. You were enjoying yourself and that was all that mattered. 

As your friends decided what games you should play next, you made the mistake of picking up your phone. Your screen displayed Instagram, where you’d left it last. You clicked on Drew’s story and saw that he was at Bar None with Baekhyun and Daren. They seemed to be having a boys’ night from what you could see. 

“Did Baekhyun invite you guys out with them?” you asked.

Sadie shook her head. “Nah. I talked to the guys earlier today but we didn’t make any plans with them. Why?”

“Just wondering,” you said. “I hung out with Baekhyun the other night and we were supposed to talk.”

Evie raised her eyebrows. “What happened?”

“We hung out as usual. Ordered food, watched TV, and we fell asleep. Just when I thought he was gonna come to bed with me, he went home.”

Sadie said, “So you didn’t talk?” You shook your head. “I think he likes someone else. I overheard him and Drew talking and—”

You stopped her, desperate for some inkling of what was going on in Baekhyun’s life. “What did he say?”

“I mean, nothing specific. He was saying that he ran into someone somewhere and that they got ice cream. He said that she was cute. I-I only caught a piece of it and to be honest, he could’ve been talking about anyone so I didn’t think much of it.” 

You rolled your eyes and picked up your phone again. You’d started the evening not thinking about Baekhyun and you let him get in your head yet again. The purpose of being here tonight was to hang out with your friends and gossip about any and everyone who wasn’t Baekhyun Byun. You found yourself on Instagram looking for Baekhyun’s account to look at his story. According to his story, last night he made instant ramen. Today around lunchtime, he had tacos and, from what he could see, he wasn’t alone. The person wasn’t in the shot but you could tell by the little bit of hand in the corner, that the feminine hand belonged to someone with perfect, powder blue nails.

You tossed your phone on the table and started looking for your drink. Evie looked at the phone and swiped backward to see what you were looking at. She cleared her throat. “Oh God.”

“It could just be a friend,” you said, refusing to accept this outcome as truth. “You know what? I’m gonna ask him.” You stood up, grabbed your phone and started putting your sandals on. 

“Where are you going?” Evie asked. “We’re gonna play UNO next.”

“I’m going to the bar.”

“No you’re not,” your friend said, standing in front of you. “Now is not the time.”

“Well I need to talk to him.”

You started toward the door, determined to see Baekhyun no matter what. Your friends couldn’t stop you. Evie started putting her shoes on, too. “Shouldn’t you try to do this sober or something?”

Sadie said, “I don’t think this is a good idea…”

“Look,” you said, shaking your head. “I tried to talk to him twice already. I say, fuck that. Third time’s a charm, right?”

*

This probably wasn’t a good idea but you were on your way, with Sadie and Evie at your side. They knew just as well as you did, deep down, that this was a terrible idea. There was no way that this would go well but you needed to know. You needed answers and you needed them now. You couldn’t go one more day without knowing where you stood with Baekhyun. You hated not knowing how he felt or where you were going.

You crossed the street, the alcohol making your legs feel like jello. The three of you were still pretty drunk and, with Sadie insisting on bringing the vape pen, you were crossfaded enough to deal with this situation. There were a million things you wanted to say, in a million different ways. You’d visualized scenarios that hadn’t happened in your head while you walked. Some outcomes you imagined were positive, with you leaving the bar hand in hand with Baekhyun, while other outcomes you imagined were more dramatic, ending with you hitting him in the head with a bottle of liquor you’d stolen from the bar. 

“What are you gonna say to him?” asked Sadie. 

“I dunno,” you said, turning the corner. “I’m gonna wing it.”

“Oh God,” you heard Evie say under her breath as you approached the bouncer standing outside. She had no idea what she was getting herself into and, to be honest, neither did you. On the way over, Evie was the main person trying to get you to change your mind about confronting Baekhyun. 

She said things like “This is going to end in disaster” and “Why not sleep off the liquor and call him tomorrow or something?” But she couldn’t change your mind. You had your mind set on one thing and one thing only. 

You showed the bouncer your ID before storming into the bar without waiting for your friends. You took in your surroundings. It was crowded now. It was after eleven now and the groups of friends that had dinner after work were beginning to make their way to the bars. You looked by the bar and didn’t find any of your friends there. You peeked over people’s heads walking by the bar and over by the seats. 

Drew and Daren were sitting in a booth, you noticed, as you got closer. Baekhyun however, was nowhere in sight. Did he leave the bar? Without greeting your friends, you said, “Where’s Baek?”

“Well damn, hello to you too Y/N,” Drew said. 

Daren laughed. “He’s in the bathroom.” You plopped down into the booth next to him. Sadie and Evie came up to the table. “What are you guys doing here?”

“We decided to come to the bar,” you said as Baekhyun approached the table. 

He glanced at you and the girls with surprise. “What are you doing here?”

“We’re bar hopping,” you snapped, turning to him. A flash of hurt crossed Baekhyun’s face but you didn’t care. “I wanna talk to you.”

“Uh,” he said, “sure.” He grabbed his drink from the table and downed the rest of it. The two of you walked out of the bar, leaving your friends behind. You stepped out into the cool night air. Baekhyun didn’t say anything. He could feel the tension and frustration radiating off of your body. He followed you around the corner into a back street.

You stopped in front of a tree, folding your arms across your chest. “I have a question.”

Baekhyun looked down at the sidewalk. “What’s up?”

“What’s going on with us?”

“What do you mean?”

“What the fuck are we doing, Baekhyun? You’ve been avoiding me…”

“I haven’t been avoiding you. We hung out the other day, like old times.”

You were pissed. Here he was acting like he was innocent, like he’d done no wrong. “Do you remember the conversation we had in May?”

Baekhyun looked up at you and nodded. “I do.”

“So,” you said, “what’s going on with us, Baekhyun?”

Baekhyun knew what you were upset about before you even said anything. You’d been wanting to talk to him for a few days and he avoided it every time even if it was just coincidence. The first time he didn’t notice because he was going to see you at brunch with your friends. At first, he’d thought it was just something small you wanted to mention casually. But you didn’t talk at brunch about anything significant and you didn’t get to talk at your place because he ended up having to take care of Daren. He didn’t put together your disappointment until later that night. He felt bad; he even thought of calling you back then. 

He had been avoiding you. He was guilty about it and he also felt guilty about Kira coming back into his life. He was seeing Kira last year before he even met you. Things hadn’t gotten too far with her then but he liked her a lot. Kira left to study abroad and then he met you the following semester. He had a bunch of classes with you and you got closer and closer; close enough to be inside you. 

It wasn’t that he regretted it or that he’d been using you because he ended up liking you. Baekhyun wanted to date you which is why he agreed to it in the first place. The thing was that he didn’t want to start dating you and then go to Korea for the summer a couple days later. He didn’t want to start the relationship off in Korea, arguing and struggling over the time difference and whether or not the two of you were seeing other people. So he wanted to wait. He made a reservation at a steakhouse called Wolfgang’s for September 20th—a Friday night. 

Today was September 20th and he was here at the bar with his friends instead of at that restaurant with you. He planned on asking you out officially then, had his plans not been derailed by a former flame coming back into the picture. He cancelled the reservation last night; that was the point of no return. He couldn’t ask you out when he felt this way about Kira instead of about you. He questioned whether the feelings he had for you had been real or not. He liked you, he cared about you, but you didn’t make his heart explode and fall to the ground in pieces. 

Baekhyun didn’t reply so you asked another question he couldn’t answer. “Do you like me?”

“Of course I like you,” he said. “I care about you.”

“But you don’t like me like that, right?” You bit your lip, trying to hold in the emotions that threatened to leave your body in the form of tears.

Baekhyun let out a sigh. This was the tough part. “I don’t think I feel like that…”

You nodded and headed over to the steps of an apartment building. You sat and ran your hands through your hair before looking up at Baekhyun. “Did you ever like me?”

Baekhyun grabbed onto your hand. “Everything that happened between us...it was real. I did have feelings for you. I never lied to you and—”

“So it’s better to lie to me now, huh?” you asked, pushing his hand away.

“Feelings can change Y/N!”

“Feelings don’t just change overnight. Two weeks ago you were in my bed. Your feelings just vanished into thin air in that short amount of time?”

“Come on, Y/N! I can’t help how I’m feeling. If you found someone you liked, wouldn’t you go for it?”

There it was: the truth. It didn’t come out in the way you thought it would but there it was. He liked someone else, just like Sadie said. You felt like a complete idiot, waiting around for him for this long when it wasn’t even a possibility.

“Don’t hate me for this,” he said. “You would’ve done the same. If things had gone well with that guy you used to like, we wouldn’t have even gotten to this point! There wouldn’t have been any confusion on what this was from the beginning…just casual sex between two people when we needed to get off, mutual entertainment!” He sighed. “Please don’t be upset. You deserve someone whose heart skips a beat when you smile...like yours used to do to me...” 

You let out a laugh and stood up. “Okay, Baekhyun. Fuck you.”

Baekhyun swore under his breath. “Y/N, please don’t take this the wrong way.”

“I think you made yourself clear tonight,” you said, a tear finally falling down your cheek. You turned on your heel and started walking away.

Crystal clear.

*****

Tag List:  @shesdreaminginoverdose @multistania​ @jeonchan26​ @myonlyaurora​ @keloiu​ 

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[chazz-anova]

...And Hell Followed With Him, Chapter 3

Guys I finally did it!! 😭 Thank you to @fadedjacket who helped motivate me to keep writing this story, and thank you to everyone who reblogs content of my girl, Veronica! 💚💚  So, without further ado, here’s my newest chapter in my main fic! (Here’s the ao3 link for those who prefer to read there!)

1 / 2

Sunlight streamed through the bedroom’s windows, casting a golden glow onto the hardwood floor. Veronica’s eyes opened lazily and she squinted into the sunshine, her throat felt dry and her stomach hollow. When she looked at the end of the bed, a grey mass of fur rose and fell slowly. Wiping the sleep from her eyes- V made out the shape of Boomer slumbering at her feet. A smile came across her features when she heard quiet snoring from him. 

Ronnie shifted her legs under the covers, trying to move slowly as not to wake her companion. Her bare feet met the planks quietly, and she went to the door. The moment she turned the knob to leave, Boomer’s head shot up and he looked around for a moment before yawning. He cocked his head at Veronica, and she went back to the bed to pat him on the head. “You can stay here, I’m gonna go check in with Mary May… and hopefully get a shower.” V tousled his floppy ears once more before heading downstairs as he settled back down.

On the main floor of the Spread Eagle- the people of Fall’s End were still celebrating their emancipation from the cult. Beer bottles clinked together and people laughed in groups. Mary May was running food and drinks to a table in the corner before she met Veronica at the bar. “Morning dep, you look tired.” The woman observed, her blonde ponytail swinging cheerfully as she wiped up a spilled drink at the end of the counter. 

“Well I feel like shit. Got any aspirin?” Came Ronnie’s response. 

“Nope, fresh out.” 

“Hair of the dog it is then! One beer please.” Veronica sighed, hopping onto a stool. 

Mary May grabbed a bottle from the cooler, setting it down in front of her with a smile. Veronica twisted off the tip, hoping the frosty beverage would quell her headache, “Also, could I use your shower, and maybe a change of clothes? I could definitely use it after last night.” 

“Go for it!” Mary called back, hurrying over to another table to take their orders. 

V headed back upstairs, opening the door to see Boomer sitting up with his tongue lolling out. “Hey little guy, sleep well?” She asked him and he hopped down, walking over to her and nosing her hand so she’d pet him. “You’re such a sweetie..” The deputy smiled and scratched under his chin before going into the en suite. 

The shower was a small standing one with subpar water pressure, but as Veronica stood in the warm torrent she released a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding. This was practically the only moment of true solitude she’d had in two days, yet she couldn’t keep her mind from racing. How was she supposed to take down Eden’s Gate when she was just one woman? Sure, she’d been lucky so far, but at the end of the day she was only one person. V thought of her mother, the bright grin on her face the day that she’d watched Veronica follow in her footsteps and graduate from the Police Academy. What would she think of her daughter now? Would she also think she was a coward and a murderer like John? 

Veronica raised a hand to clutch the heart-shaped locket her Nana had given her; it hung loosely around her neck and the metal was growing colder as the hot water depleted. She tried to shake the thoughts from her mind, thinking ‘I’ve only done what I had to do… my hand’s been forced..’ Yet in the back of her mind, V knew part of her wasn’t hating this, part of her wanted to make the people who’d snatched her from her normal life pay for the turmoil she was going through.  

Almost thirty minutes later, Ronnie emerged from the steamy room wrapped in a fluffy purple towel. She immediately made her way to the dresser and dug through the drawers until she found an outfit that suited her. ‘Anything is better than tan fuckin’ cargo pants.’ She chuckled to herself, laying out dark blue jeans and a low-cut black tank top. 

Once changed, she admired herself in the mirror and slipped her boots on. She noticed her brunette roots were spreading, and she was sure it would be a long time before she could dye it again. 

Next, Veronica strapped her holstered handgun around her waist and grabbed her backpack and M60, swinging both over her shoulders. “God this gun is fucking heavy!” She cursed. Taking one last look around the room before heading downstairs, she saw Boomer had taken his leave already. ‘That dog has a mind of his own.’ V smiled, and closed the door behind her. 

On the main floor of the Spread Eagle, business was still booming. Mary May was behind the bar speaking to one of the patrons who sat in front of her. When she caught Ronnie’s eye, she gestured her over. “Deputy! After a shower and a beer you seem bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.”

“Well I certainly feel better. Any way I could badger you for a meal?” The woman pulled out her wallet from the red backpack containing most of her belongings. 

“You put that away, heroes eat free in my bar!” 

At being called a hero, Veronica stiffened. The moniker didn’t seem to fit as comfortably as the barkeep used it; ‘What kind of hero murders people?’ Her mind practically shouted at her. 

Mary May had already turned towards the kitchen, calling out “Casey? Get our friend, the deputy, some breakfast ready- would ya?” 

The man in the window wiped his hands on his apron and nodded at the pair “One full breakfast, coming up!” 

V came to her senses once more and put her wallet back in the pack she’d withdrawn it from, giving the barkeep a smile. “I appreciate that, but the ‘hero’ stuff isn’t necessary… I’m just trying to do what’s right, that’s all.” 

“Oh I don’t think you have to worry about trying, seems like doin’ what’s right’s in your blood, hun. Not a lot of people would run in here guns ablazing to save a town of near strangers.” The blonde gave her another smile before going to check on her tables. 

“That’s a pretty thought.” Veronica mused, thinking she wasn’t quite sure what was right anymore. 

Her foot tapped against the metal of the bar stool as she watched the chef work, her stomach growling at her impatiently. She realised the last time she’d eaten was well over 24 hours ago, and that thought did nothing to help her hunger panes. Turning to the patron next to her, Veronica asked “Got a cig?” The man next to her obliged, giving her a nod as she stepped off the barstool and out the front door. 

“I really wish this were a joint.” V shook her head before lighting up, inhaling the bitter fumes. Cigarettes had never been her favourite vice- but she would take what she could get at this point. 

The morning sun poured over the small town, framing everything in an angelic light. Townspeople roamed through the streets, picking up debris and throwing it into contractor bags. Despite spending almost the whole previous day cleaning and mending the broken town, there was still much to be done. It heartened Veronica to see the people of Fall’s End working together to fix their home.

Another drag of her cigarette, and the deputy couldn’t help but reflect on the past two days. She’d seen more bloodshed than in her whole life, and been the cause of most of it. The weight of each death she had caused was heavy on her heart as she replayed watching the light fade from too many eyes. 

Ronnie had never thought she’d need to discharge her weapon in the line of duty. Working at the Hope County Sheriff’s Department was a relatively easy job, there were your fair share of crazy people and petty criminals, but she had never seen anything like this. It crossed her mind that every time a call regarding Eden’s Gate had come across the scanner, her partner, Staci Pratt, had been completely against going and always let someone else go in their place. ‘Hell, even Sheriff Whitehorse didn’t seem to want to send us on those calls. God I hope he’s okay…’ 

Veronica’s mind drifted to her companions- and what they must be going through at the hands of the cult. Dutch had assured her that they were all alive, but he’d neglected to give her any details. She thought of Joey- the fear on her face as she had been snatched out of the flaming wreckage of their helicopter. Now where was she? Trapped by John, being held against her will for what purpose? To convert her? 

The thoughts and questions raced through the deputy’s head, making her feel dazed. She continued to circle back to one thought: ‘I have to save them, I’m the only one who can.’ Her fingers felt the warmth of the cherry of her cigarette, and she realised she had smoked it down to the filter. V tossed it to the ground and wandered back inside. The customers were rowdy for only 11 in the morning, and their clamoring mixed with the song on the jukebox to create a nice din that allowed Veronica to not have to think anymore. 

Reaching the bar, she saw a plate filled to the brim with eggs, bacon, and toast. Her stomach rejoiced as she picked up the silver fork and dug in. 

In no time at all, the heavy meal rested comfortably in the deputy’s stomach. Ronnie leaned back on the stool and patted her midsection with a delighted smile. “My compliments to the chef!” She grinned and felt some of her bad mood fading away. 

Mary May strode behind the bar and leaned over it, resting her elbows on the polished wood. “Don’t say that, or it’ll go straight to his head!” She chuckled, glancing at the kitchen window.

“So, deputy, remember last night when I mentioned you.. lending a hand?” 

“I don’t remember much of last night, but I do recall that… what do you have in mind?”

Mary May took a deep breath, her gaze turning to the bar. “Yesterday, you had some balls running into town like that. Most people see Eden’s Gate and run the other way… but, my dad was one of the first to stand up to ‘em. Any time one of those peggies would show up lookin’ to cause trouble- he’d hop in his big rig and chase them right outta town.” She smiled at the memory, and with a nod she continued, “He loved that truck; called it the ‘Widowmaker’.”

Her face darkened, thunderclouds practically rolling into her deep blue eyes. “Those fuckers stole it from him, a week before he passed…” Her fist clenched on the bar and she shook her head.

“I’m so sorry, I had no idea.” Veronica sympathised, unsure if she should take the other’s hand but ultimately deciding against it. 

The blonde pulled herself from her memories and met V’s eyes once more. “You really wanna piss off the cult? Get the Widowmaker back. Show them we’re not just gonna roll over… and give folks here something to cheer about.” 

At this, Ronnie nodded; mulling it over for a moment. “How do you propose I do that?” 

“It’s locked up under guard at a grain mill not far from here. Hell, you came in here and saved a whole town! I think you’re the person for the job, Veronica.” 

The deputy saw sincerity and a hint of desperation in the bartender’s eyes, striking a cord in her. This woman had shown her some much needed friendship yesterday when the past days’ events were starting to take their toll, and Veronica wanted to do what she could for her. ‘This is also the only way I can get any closer to saving Joey, even though that’s a daunting enough task…’ V felt herself almost begin brooding, but got back on track quickly- “Okay, one Widowmaker coming up!” 

Relief washed over Mary May’s features, and she smiled, “Somehow I knew I could count on you, dep.” 

She returned her smile, and the two shared a happy moment despite the days of chaos. “Could I steal a beer for the road?” Ronnie asked. 

Turning to grab a cold one from the cooler, Mary May obliged- popping off the cap and handing it over. “Be safe out there, and go ahead and take the Jeep ‘round back, just park it somewhere I can go get it after this business is over. The grain elevator is northeast of here, follow the road and you’ll be there in no time.” She offered as the deputy headed for the door. 

“Thanks, I figure I can’t order an Uber around here.” V joked as she managed to catch the keys Mary May threw unceremoniously her way.

Outside- the morning sun rose higher and higher, blinding Veronica as she stepped out of the Spread Eagle. She made her way around the side, spotting the Jeep at the end of the dirt driveway. As she opened the driver’s door, a bark came from behind her. “Hey buddy!” The woman turned to see Boomer watching her expectantly. He padded closer to her with a small whine. “I don’t know if you should go with on this one, it’s pretty dangerous…” 

His brown almond eyes met hers as if to say ‘And our last escapade wasn’t?’. She shook her head with a chuckle, reaching down to scratch him under the chin saying, “Most dogs aren’t adrenaline junkies, that’ll take some getting used to!” 

Sighing, Ronnie put her hands on her hips; Boomer stood there, projecting as much sass as a 35 pound furball could. Finally relenting, she moved away from the open door and gestured him in, “Fine, I guess if you want to run headlong into danger I can’t stop you!” 

The pup jumped into the passenger seat, celebrating his victory. Veronica took her spot next to him and started the car, pulling out of the driveway while fiddling with the radio. Faced with the ‘only-two-radio-stations-conundrum’, the deputy landed on the peggie station. The song playing relayed the perks of baptism, advising the listener to ‘let the water wash away their sins’. 

“Is this seriously all they listen to?” V asked, glancing at Boomer as they cruised down the road. The dog sighed, putting his head between his feet in agreeance. She reached forward and switched the station back to the original one, where a soft rock song played.

The trees they passed blurred together, one green line as they sped to their destination. Veronica couldn’t help but let her thoughts stray to her own father. When Ronnie was only twelve, Benjamin Rook had ruined their family’s picturesque life by finding love in the arms of another woman, and abandoning Veronica and her mother. He moved to North Carolina and forfeited his parental rights without much of a fight so he could start life anew without the burden of his old family. 

Letters would come in the mail; at first every week but then every two, then every month, and then not at all. Before long, Sarah Rook had decided her and her daughter needed a change of their own. The two packed up their belongings and moved from Butte, Montana to Hope County, right on the outskirts of Missoula. 

Sarah, with previous law enforcement experience, had no problem securing a job at the Hope County Sheriff’s Department. She became quick friends with Earl Whitehorse, who was chief deputy to the sheriff at the time. Because of this friendship, she’d been able to secure a job for her daughter those many years later when Ronnie had felt so lost and needed a direction to go in life.

The wound of her father leaving never quite healed, and it wasn’t one Veronica tore open too often unless she was deep in her cups. Seeing the admiration Mary May held for her own father had almost reared the ugly head of jealousy in her; however irrational that may be. At the same time, she’d felt the need to preserve that happiness in any way she could. ‘Man, projecting much?’ She chastised herself. The things lack of closure will do to you. 

Coming out of the trees, V saw a towering grey structure up the road and knew she’d reached her destination. To the side of the grain elevator and the building next to it rose a large hill. The deputy pulled off into a clearing, making sure the Jeep was out of sight of the road before getting out. 

Boomer hopped out with her once parked, and the pair began their trek up the hill. It took them only a couple minutes before they were at the summit and had a decent view of their objective. The cattle dog growled at the sight of peggies patrolling the grounds, armed to the teeth. “We gotta be careful, okay bud? Just follow my lead and stay safe.” Veronica smiled reassuringly at him and pet his head. 

The hill they stood upon sloped directly down to the fence around the building in which the deputy knew the Widowmaker must be kept, offering her a quick entrance to her objective. Patches of tall grass and flowers offered sufficient camouflage as the woman and her dog crept downhill. As they approached- the sound of the cult’s music and sermons could be heard. John’s voice was practically blasting over the speaker as he preached, “...We are fast approaching the Collapse! Soon, the world as you know it will be gone, and with it- all that is cruel and evil!”  

V rolled her eyes at his words, trying to count the cultists waiting below. John’s voice continued, “But for those of you that embrace us, those of you who say yes to the Father; Eden’s Gate will provide salvation! Do not be afraid, God has graced us with the opportunity to start anew!” 

The deputy pulled around her backpack, pulling out a pair of binoculars. “Looks like four peggies so far…” She muttered, watching them patrol. John’s voice over the speaker grew sinister as he said, “But not everyone is going to embrace us, some have fires that need.. dampening. Some need our help to say yes… that is the will of the Father, to say yes! To say ‘Yes I will be reborn.’, to say ‘Yes I will give my life for the project.’, to say ‘Yes I will pledge my soul to the family at Eden’s Gate!’!” 

Veronica tossed the binoculars back into the pack and shared a horrified look with Boomer, affirming “Sounds like cult shit to me!” Her pup whined in response, taking the lead as they reached the bottom of the slope. 

Slinging her M60 around her shoulders to the front of her body, Ronnie popped open the top and made sure the gun was fully loaded. As she did so- the deputy caught herself humming the cult song she’d heard on the radio barely thirty minutes earlier. “‘Now that this whole world is ending….’ fuck that song is such an earworm!” She cussed to herself and let the gun settle against her body once more. Taking a few deep breaths to prepare herself for whatever may occur, she decided it was now or never.

  The woman lowered to almost a crawl and made her way to the bottom of the hill, into one of the flower patches. The soft yellow flowers had a perfumy scent that filled the air, but Veronica felt no different among the blossoms so she assumed these weren’t the Bliss flowers Dutch had mentioned.

One of the men who guarded the building strolled out of the fenced area, coming to stand just in front of her. He was whistling quietly, not paying attention to the danger behind him. V checked that no other peggies had followed him, and she rushed forward to grab him in a chokehold; slowly taking him to the ground and pressing her arm to his windpipe until he stopped struggling. She hoisted him onto her shoulder and retreated to the flower patch. After dropping him to the ground, Veronica checked his pocket and found a twenty dollar bill and a grenade. “Seriously? Are all these guys armed like this?” She wondered aloud before sliding the grenade into her bag. She hesitated over taking the money, thinking ‘Am I any better than one of them if I take this?’ After a moment, Ronnie slid the bill back into his pocket, thinking better of it. 

Leaving her fallen enemy, she made her way back to the chain link fence and passed through a gate leading to a space behind the building filled with piles of wood, pallets covered in tarp, and all manner of odds and ends. Veronica took refuge behind a pile of 2x4s and peeked over it, spotting only one cultist at the end of the alley. Boomer waited outside of the gate, watching her every move. ‘I’ll take this guy out, and just keep trying to move forward.’ She planned loosely.

V moved from crate to crate, getting closer to her target until got close enough to take him out much the same way she did his lookout. She stashed this body behind a crate, finding only some spare ammo on him before advancing. 

At the end of the warehouse was the backdoor. Ronnie tried the handle, but found it to be locked. “Well fuck..” She sighed. Turning to her right to continue on, she saw a note next to the door. 

“The warehouse is to remain locked and access is limited. If you need to get inside you can find the key by the workshop tent, but check with the Baptist before using it. We can’t afford to be careless around the Widowmaker.”

The deputy frowned, “Baptist… that must be John.” The last line gave her a light laugh and she murmured, “I think it’s more careless to leave a note saying where your key is stashed, assholes.” And she set off. 

In the space in front of the building, Veronica counted four more peggies. Looking to Boomer, Veronica murmured “It’s a damn infestation.” She scanned the ground and found plenty of small rocks, and helped herself to a few. One man was near the corner of the compound, away from the others. Taking careful aim, one rock was thrown about 10 feet from him. The man startled before going to investigate. V smirked and threw another one at the side of the building, luring him away from the flock. Once the man was alone he was dispatched, leaving only three. 

Creeping further out than before, Ronnie saw the three gathered around two large cages covered in black. On the side, they both read ‘Meat Wagon’ and angry growls could be heard from within. ‘What the fuck is a ‘meat wagon’?’ She wondered. 

“That was a hard hunt today.” One of them said, looking at the others. 

“It was… I hope Brother Jacob appreciates these offerings.” The one in the middle replied. 

The gnashing of teeth could be heard clearly as Veronica recalled what she’d read in Dutch’s bunker, ‘Jacob, he’s the eldest… didn’t his note say something about monster wolves?’ She contemplated this, deciding the best course of action. 

She drew her pistol, shooting the lock on the first cage and allowing a large grey wolf to spring forth, leaping onto the cultist that had called it an ‘offering’. The wolf savaged the man as the others yelled, raising their guns. Before they could even get any shots off V shot them both to the ground. 

The thick sounds of flesh tearing reached Veronica’s ears, and were sure to occupy her nightmares later. Once the wolf finished his revenge, its amber eyes found her own and a deep growl emitted from its throat. The deputy froze, licking her lips nervously as her life practically flashed in front of her eyes. 

It felt like far longer than a minute as the wolf contemplated the deputy. Suddenly, the beast broke eye contact and looked behind her before dashing out of the tall gate leading to the road, and then to the treeline; content to not eat its savior. 

It was only when Ronnie could no longer see the wolf that she resumed breathing. She turned around to see Boomer watching her. “Did you just scare a wolf?” She asked him in disbelief. The dog barked twice in response, and V sighed in relief “Props where props are due... holy fuck that was scary!” 

After another solid minute, they headed towards the tent mentioned in the note. The keys to the warehouse were sitting on a table directly inside, and Veronica grabbed them. 

Once inside the warehouse- the deputy took in the sight of her charge. The semi-truck was painted purple with a mural of a bald eagle painted on the side, and hot-rod flames graced the hood. On the front near the grill, twin M2 Browning machine guns were mounted. “Wow… I think I’m in love.” V chuckled, staring at the machine in awe before tentatively climbing into the cab, keeping the door open for her furry friend to hop in. She found the key and the garage opener in the visor, and then they were off. 

Easily crashing through the fence gate, Veronica felt they were home free until someone called over the radio “Someone made off with the Widowmaker! Block the roads leading back to Fall’s End, don’t let it through!” Ronnie took a deep breath and turned up the radio, blasting rock music.

As she sped towards the first roadblock, Mary May’s voice crackled through the radio, exclaiming “Holy shit you did it! I knew you had it in the bag, V!” Before Veronica could think of a response, she continued. “Listen, the cult’s gonna throw everything at you now, shove it right back down their fuckin’ throats! My daddy put cannons on that thing, don’t be afraid to use ‘em!”

“You got it!” Ronnie called into the radio. She scanned the cab and her eyes landed on a trigger mechanism near the gearshift. The truck barrelled forward and the Brownings fired off, sending several peggies flying. Boomer hunkered down in the passenger seat, attempting still to peek up through the windshield.

Ahead, two of the off-white trucks with Eden’s Gate symbols blocked the way. The deputy braced herself for impact as the 18-wheeler crashed through the first of many roadblocks; the first truck flipped off of the road and the second spun out of the way. “Goddamn!” The deputy yelled as the Widowmaker hurtled down the asphalt. 

The truck cleared the block with no damage, and Veronica lit up like a kid in a candy shop. She turned to her companion in the other seat, Boomer gave her a big doggy smile and turned back to look out the window. V pressed the call button on her radio, reaching out to Mary May. “This is pretty badass!” She whooped. 

A second later, her friend was on the line, saying “Hell yeah! Hit those sons of bitches! Better yet, honk that horn every time you do so I know when to cheer!” 

As they approached the next roadblock, a fierce grin came over her features and she smoothed a finger over the trigger in anticipation. The upcoming barrier was composed of one white truck, and a fuel truck blocking the entire road. When they were about two-hundred feet from the block, Veronica pulled the trigger, shooting off round after round into the tank on the truck ahead. When they were only a hundred feet away from it- the fuel truck erupted into a blaze, sending flaming shrapnel flying in every direction. Clearing the second block, V laid on the horn with an almost crazed grin.

The pair flew down the road and through the wall of heat and embers that had roasted all nearby cultists.  They had once more come out without a scratch, causing Ronnie to rejoice. “Woo! This is the shit!!” She yelled, adrenaline pumping as the music resounded through the cab and they careened down the country road. 

A few minutes later, the turn to Fall’s End was the next left. V’s eyes darted between the turn and the open road that lay ahead. ‘I’m sure the cult has even more roadblocks ahead.’ She mulled the thought over before turning to Boomer and declaring “I say we do a victory lap!” Before pressing the pedal almost to the floor, rushing down the road. 

Many roadblocks later- Veronica and her furry friend were once again rounding the bend that led to the turn for Fall’s End. The deputy felt as though she was practically vibrating with the adrenaline coursing through her veins. The sounds of men screaming, the warmth of the multitude of explosions, the feeling of the trigger under her finger growing more and more comfortable. Her aquamarine eyes seemed to glaze over as she considered what all this might mean for her, and what her eagerness to cause mayhem may say about her true nature. 

Before V could travel too far down that rabbit hole, her radio crackled to life with the grateful voice of her friend, “The way you’re handling that rig would make my dad proud, Ronnie. Now bring her home!” 

Hearing Mary May’s voice laden with joy, Veronica couldn’t help a small smile. “Be there in 5!” She called back down the line, turning down the road at the sign for Fall’s End. 

The moment Veronica and Boomer rumbled down main street to the Spread Eagle, the blonde bartender could be seen waving them on. The rig turned slowly onto the dirt driveway- and the hydraulics of the brake system hissing loudly as the 18-wheeler came to a full stop. 

V pulled the keys from the ignition and the truck shuddered as the engine cut off, leaving the semi to creak and settle like a great beast falling into the deep slumber of hibernation when the pair hopped out of the cab. 

Boomer’s tail wagged and he bounded ahead to circle round Mary May’s legs before returning to his companion’s side. Across from the pair, the barkeep beamed at the sight of the rig right where it belonged. 

“I gotta say, deputy, seeing my daddy’s truck rumbling home sure brings back memories. I’d stand out here every time he came back, just like this, wavin’ him home.” A sigh escaped the woman and she nodded at Veronica, her eyes almost misting over. “Thank you for this, I honestly can’t thank you enough.” 

Seeing the joy and nostalgia from her newfound friend warmed V’s heart, and she offered the other a heartfelt smile. “Ain’t nothin’ but a thing, girl. I’m glad to stick it to those peggies, show them they’re not the ones in charge. Not for long anyways.” 

Mary May clapped her on the shoulder, looking up at the semi, her face filled with pride. “You know, my dad woulda liked you. You’ve got grit, that’s for sure! If you ever need to use the Widowmaker you don’t even gotta ask!” Moving past Veronica, the other placed a hand on the curved steel of the machine, sliding a hand lovingly over the smooth metal. 

Ronnie’s smile faded, and she scratched the back of her neck. Clearing her throat softly, she spoke, “I really appreciate that, Mary May. Listen… do you know anything yet? …About Deputy Hudson, I mean.” 

The blonde met her eyes, a frown plain on her face as she stated, “I ain’t heard nothing good, I can tell you that. All I know so far is that John’s got your friend holed up somewhere, and he’s trying to make her ‘atone’, whatever the fuck that means. So far it sounds like Hudson’s been holding out- but no one can hold out against John for long. Motherfucker’s crazy.” She spit on the ground, as though unable to contain her disgust. 

Anxiety overtook Veronica, icy cold fear freezing the blood in her veins. At the forefront of her brain, images of Joey bound and bloodied assaulted her senses. Swallowing past her emotions, V asked, “What can I do next??” 

Mary May put a reassuring hand on her shoulder before taking a few steps towards the bar. “Go talk to Jerome at his church, then come back and see me. I’m gonna go put my ear to the ground, and make a ridiculously strong drink with your name on it.” 

“Sounds like a plan… especially that drink.” Ronnie muttered. 

Once she was sure the bartender had made her way back inside, Veronica wrapped her arms around herself, a shiver running down her spine despite the warm breeze touseling her dirty blonde locks. She thought of her friends, each of them trapped and waiting for her. The weight of her obligations felt like too much to bear for one woman- but she knew there were no other options. Her hands fell to her sides, and her gaze was drawn to the ground. ‘What the hell am I doing here? Running around playing vigilante… and enjoying it, for fucks sake! These people may be monsters, but I sure as shit am not any better.’ V scoffed, chastising herself silently. 

Her hand felt wet for a moment, and she looked next to her to see Boomer nudging her with his shiny black nose. He licked her again and met her eyes- his tongue lolling out of his mouth as he gave her a big smile as if to say, “It’ll all work out!”.

Despite everything, the corners of her lips tugged upwards, and she lifted her hand to stroke his soft fur. “Thanks bud, don’t you worry about me, I can handle this...” She reassured him, not quite convincing either of them. 

Behind them, church bells from down the road chimed suddenly, signifying the top of the hour. The pair’s gaze was drawn to where the bells swung in the white tower- sounding off three times before coming to a stop. The echo of the last ring filled the air, and Veronica adjusted the strap of her M60 uneasily, looking down at Boomer once more to say, “Sounds like that’s our cue, huh?” 

The pup barked encouragingly, starting off down the short road without looking behind to see if she followed. After only a moment of hesitation, V joined him. 

Golden sunlight filled the near empty streets, painting the white walls of the church a shining shade of yellow. Paint peeled off the outside walls, but a platform on the side of the building with painting supplies held the promise of the future. 

A simple garden graced the front of the building; two large flower pots framed the stairs leading to the entrance. Under a large glass window- the doors to the church were propped open, offering a view of the interior. Pastor Jerome sat on a chair in the front of the church, a Bible in one hand as he read to an injured man lying on a mattress on the floor. 

As Veronica came through the entrance, she noted the bullet holes in the walls that were accompanied by violent maroon swatches of dried blood. It was hard to believe the fight for Fall’s End was merely 24 hours ago. The deputy stopped at the end of the aisle as Jerome’s words echoed off the holy walls. 

“Psalm 41:3, and the Lord will heal him upon his sickbed, The Lord sustains them on their sickbed and restores them from their bed of illness. In the darkest of times, there’s always a bit of light.” 

On the mattress, the man’s eyes stayed closed and he rolled on his side. The pastor’s eyes lifted from his pages, finding Ronnie’s. He greeted her with a smile, closing the book but leaving his thumb in it to preserve his spot. “Veronica. I’m glad you came.” 

Clearing her throat, she replied “I just finished helping Mary May, I figured I’d drop in and see what you needed help with.” The woman’s finger ran down the strap on her weapon restlessly, glancing at the podium behind Jerome. It wasn’t hard to envision him there, preaching to his flock. 

The man in front of her nodded, adjusting his glasses. “Jeremiah 23:16, ‘Do not listen to what the prophets are prophesying to you; they speak visions from their own minds, not from the mouth of the Lord.” He met her eyes once more and there was a weight to his gaze she didn’t quite understand.

Resisting the urge to say ‘Huh?’ and give him an annoyed look, Ronnie waited for him to continue. She’d never liked church, but standing in one now with proverbial blood on her hands felt even more wrong.

He waited only a moment more before saying, “Scripture tells us there is evil in the world. And that horrible things happen for reasons that do not make sense.” The pastor sighed.  “A long time ago, in peaceful times, I asked John Seed what was driving him. He gave me so many answers… all of them lies. I had one conversation with him and I knew. I knew… he masks his words as guidance, but deep down there is a selfishness that can only come from pure evil.” 

Not knowing what to say, Veronica looked away from him. She saw the man on the mattress had stirred, his eyes were glazed over with milky white cataracts yet they still searched the room for something. His breath came out in labored wheezes. 

On the floor next to the mattress, a cup of water lay within his reach. V leaned over to grab it, putting a gentle hand on the man’s arm and saying, “Here…” While guiding the cup into his now waiting hands. He took small sips before offering it back, rasping out a quiet thank you as he settled back onto the bare bed. 

“You seem tense, Veronica, how are you holding up?” 

A long sigh escaped her lips, and she took a seat in one of the askew pews. “I’m not sure how to answer that.” Came her honest response. 

“Do you need to talk about something?” He offered. 

Ronnie smiled humorlessly- finally looking at him. “You know, this is the first time I’ve been in a church since my grandma died.” 

Jerome pondered her for a moment before inquiring, “How old were you?” 

“23. It was just last year, actually. I don’t go to church, but she did… every day. Except one morning she didn’t wake up, and she never went again. What do you think that got her? Do you think she stamped her ticket to heaven by going to church?” 

When Veronica received no reply, she continued, “Because if that’s the case, I think my ticket’s already been revoked. Especially now.” 

Settling his elbows on his knees, the pastor leaned forward. “Why especially now?” 

V shook her head, a dry laugh escaping her. “Isn’t murder a big no-no to the man upstairs?”

Jerome frowned at her, understanding her tangent now. He took a moment to contemplate his answer. “Years ago… I refused to own a gun. I relied on the Lord to help me win every battle, to stand by my side and lead me to victory. Now, I know better.” He stood from his chair to join her where she sat dejectedly. “We are fighting a war, deputy. You’re here to protect people.” 

She couldn’t help but scoff. “I’m here because I got thrown in a fucking river and dragged into this ‘war’. Excuse my French.” 

“Veronica, I can’t heal the pain you’re feeling but I can say this: there’s a destiny for everyone. The work you’re doing here, fighting against Eden’s Gate, this is the Lord’s work. You are doing what you must, and every one of us is grateful. You are stronger than even you know.” Jerome gave her a long look, his faith in her clear in his eyes. “The cult has done so much damage to this Valley, and you’re doing right by us. Giving people something to believe in again… you can’t know how much that means to all of us.” 

The woman took a deep breath, unsure how to feel. Jerome’s words filled her with hope for herself, and her friends; but she worried about what her breaking point might be. ‘At least someone thinks I’m doing this shit right.’ She thought, the weight of the world temporarily lifted from her tired shoulders. “Is it ironic that I’m an atheist?” Ronnie asked, a small smile appearing on her features. 

“I think that’s the definition of irony, my friend.” Jerome smiled with her, and for the moment they both felt a sense of calm. 

Veronica nodded, the idea of doing more dirty work not bothering her as much as when she first stepped in. ‘If a literal pastor thinks I’m the good guy, then I am, right?’ She reasoned with herself, pushing aside her moral dilemmas for now. “So, what exactly is it you need from me?” 

Jerome sighed, suddenly weary once more. “With the Resistance budding, and people starting to fight back, I’ve been needed here in Fall’s End now more than ever.” He stood once more and wandered to the front of the church, pacing as he continued, “As you can see- John’s making a lot of people suffer right now, and quite frankly, I can’t keep up. These people need me, they’re my responsibility now... but that just means keeping tabs on the Resistance has been that much harder.” 

The deputy nodded, urging him to finish his thought. It seemed everyone was experiencing some degree of the mental turmoil she’d been enduring over the past few days. 

“There are a couple of people hiding away at Woodson Pig Farm, trying to hold out from the cult. I haven’t heard from them in a few days now, and I’m getting worried. Can you check on them for me? We can’t afford to lose a single one of our fighters.” The man pleaded, finally coming to a stop at his podium. 

Veronica reached into her backpack, pulling out the map Dutch had given her. “Where’s it at?” 

Jerome pointed out a building almost directly east of Fall’s End, only a couple miles away. 

The deputy nodded and stashed her map, “I’m off then!” As she headed for the exit, Boomer got up from where he’d been lying in the corner and stretched before following after. V paused in the doorway, turning back to say, “Thank you, Pastor. Really.” 

“Any time, Veronica. I’m a pretty good listener. Good luck.” He nodded to her as she stepped through the threshold. 

In less than 10 minutes, the duo saw a long dirt drive leading up a hill into the trees. They could hear shouting not too far away. “Sounds like it’s time to ditch the car.” V pulled the key from the ignition, and the pair left it at the bottom of the driveway. 

They trudged up the hill, the yelling growing closer by the moment. At the crest of the driveway, there was a worn sign that read “Woodson Pig Farm, Family Farm Since 1942” with a pink pig above. The word ‘Gluttony’ had been scrawled on the pig. 

Behind the sign stood a small, mint-green house with dried flowers adorning the front porch. A rustic looking fence surrounded the house and farm, but had been broken down in a few spots where the cult’s trucks had crashed through. Veronica crouched behind one and peered around it. 

The front door of the house stood ajar, and a single peggie stood inside. He held his gun close, and was yelling at another man who was bound on his knees. “Saying yes is the only way!” He shouted before using the butt of his gun to hit the man in the face. Ronnie winced as the captive spat blood. 

Creeping closer, the deputy peered through the windows of the house. She saw no one else inside, and inched forward. Next to the frame of the door, a white and red poster had been hastily hung. Veronica’s eyebrows raised in surprise as she recognized what the poster depicted. It was a ‘Wanted’ poster, with the word ‘Sinner’ bolded on the bottom; the picture in the center was from a grainy security camera, but Veronica’s face could be clearly made out. 

‘Wow, I’m so infamous I get my own wanted poster?’ She thought with a brief, bemused smile. Ronnie made it to the doorway, and pulled out her long black hunting knife. Inside, the cultist was still yelling at his hostage with his back to the doorway. 

Veronica crept forward and then lunged, grabbing the man and thrusting the blade through his neck. A deluge of blood sprang from the nicked artery, painting both the cultist and the hostage red. V kept her hand clamped down on her victim’s mouth, until his muffled yelling turned into choking gasps. 

The man’s body slumped to the floor; and the woman wiped her knife on his shirt before using it to cut the bonds of her ally. The man stood his eyes wide with shock. “Go, get out of here and hide! I’ll take care of the rest of them.” Veronica insisted. The man nodded shakily and turned, running out the door. 

Ronnie moved through the living room to the back of the house, heading towards the back door. She paused at the entrance to the bedroom, where she could see two peggies outside the window. One held a flamethrower, and was using it liberally on a pile of the occupant’s belongings. 

Pressing on to the back, V came through the door into blinding brightness and held an arm over her gaze to let her eyes adjust. When they did, she gagged at the sight in front of her. In the fenced pen, a pile of pig corpses festered in the sun. To the left of this awful vision, another cultist berated a woman lying on the ground, her hands and feet bound. 

A moment was needed to compose herself, then Veronica crouched once more to sneak along the side of the building. Behind her, the other two peggies were bickering. “Brother John’s head is clouded. We should just kill the deputy.” One of them said. 

“He said she needs to atone, see the error of her ways. He’s serious about this one.” The other replied, his tone cautionary. 

A chill seized Veronica as she imagined herself at the hands of John; tied to a chair, at his mercy. A strong shiver traveled down her spine, and she stiffened as her brain took that thought in a much different context. Bile filled her throat with the realization that even with all she knew of John, she was still attracted to him. She shook her head, shooing the thought from her conscious.

Behind her, Boomer had made his way out the back door and to her side. It relieved her to see him, and she smiled. “Wanna tag team on this one?” Veronica asked her companion. 

The cattle dog’s ears perked up, and he scratched at the ground in anticipation. Nodding, Ronnie murmured “Good boy! Now, see him?” She pointed to the man in the pig pen. “You take care of him, and I’ll grab them.” Her finger drifted to the pair who were still complaining behind them. 

Seeming to understand, Boomer started forward with his ears low and came up behind the man. He leapt forward and seized the peggie’s arm- wrenching him down to the ground. The man fell with a startled yell and hit the dirt. Boomer wasted no time and went for the jugular,  mauling him before he could make another noise. 

At the same time, Veronica pulled her M60 forward and jumped out from behind her cover. She shot a spray of bullets at the two cultists, not even giving them time to go for their weapons before they dropped. V let the machine gun fall against her, and she went to the woman in the pig pen to cut her loose. 

“Thank you, deputy, I knew you’d come!” The hostage professed, picking up her deceased captor’s weapon. 

Ronnie gave her a bashful smile, replying “Happy to help, Miss… now you should get out of here, get somewhere safe.” What she was really thinking was, ‘Am I a household name or something? Jesus.’ 

The woman nodded before turning and leaving through a gate in the fence. 

Once she was out of sight- Veronica turned back to the house and headed back inside. In the living room, she was about to pull out her radio and call Jerome when she heard something that made her stop. A faint click, and then something that sounded like whispering came from above. 

V looked all around her, finally stopping in the middle of the living room and peering up. Above her there was a large, square opening that looked like it had been hastily covered by flattened cardboard boxes. She frowned and jumped up, hitting one of the pieces with a thud. The sound suddenly stopped. 

Jumping again, Ronnie batted the cardboard away and left the opening uncovered. She paused for a moment, listening hard for anything. A few moments passed with no noise- and the woman made one last jump to grip the edge of the opening. With a small  grunt, she pulled herself upwards into the attic space. 

As she hoisted herself up, she took in her surroundings. The attic was small, only the length of the living room. Two wooden shelves stood opposite one another; one filled with only boxes and the other holding some ammo and a tac vest. Next to the second shelf, there was a dark recess in the wall. 

Veronica clutched her gun closer, and heard the same noise as before: a click followed by a softer noise. She stepped closer to the recess in the wall, and could finally distinguish the noise. A man huddled in the space behind the wall, gripping his radio and whispering hurriedly, “That sinner’s here!! Send a capture party! We can get her for John!” 

Their eyes met, and the deputy scowled at the man before firing at him. He fell backwards with the force of the bullets, gore covering the wall behind him. His radio was still intact, and his contact could be heard shouting “It’s deputy huntin’ season! Capture not kill, we need her alive! Use Bliss bullets!” 

The woman grabbed some ammo off the nearby shelf and stuffed it into her backpack. After taking what she needed, she dropped down into the living room and checked her gun. As she was about to reload- an off-white Eden’s Gate truck screeched to a stop in front of the house, and three men in heavy riot gear hopped out. 

Upon seeing this, Veronica dove for cover before they could see her. Her back rested against the wall next to the front door, and she heard one of them shout “Come on out darlin’!” She swung around her backpack and pulled out her radio, turning it to the frequency she wanted. 

“Jerome, it’s Veronica, I secured the farm but one of those fucks called for backup and they said something about a capture party? I don’t know what the hell that is, but I sure as shit don’t plan on finding out.” She babbled into the radio. When no response came, the deputy moved underneath the window, readying her weapon. She peeked up and aimed, seeing one of them on the porch. 

Before Ronnie could get off a shot, a sound behind her caused her to whip around and she was confronted with one of the men; who must have come in the back while she was making her call. He shot a round, hitting her in the thigh and causing her to yelp with pain. Before she could make a comment about his aim, or think about why the bullet hadn’t torn through her, her vision blurred. 

The world became shaky- and stars swarmed her sight. V was able to slur together a few words before she passed out, and she grumbled “You… asshole…”

Though she could no longer see, Veronica could feel someone pick her up in a fireman’s carry. She knew they’d tossed her into the back of the truck, and heard the engine rumbling in the distance. A few bumps in the road were the last things she felt every sensation was gone, and she fell into a white abyss of Bliss. 

[funeralhomewifi]

First Kiss(es) - MC x Diavolo

Summary: Verona (my mc) kisses Diavolo. She leaves out of embarrassment, but Diavolo ensures her that he’s more than okay with trying again to get it right.

Word Count: 2,186

The first time Verona kisses Diavolo, she doesn’t process it fully at first. Only the panic at first, because she just kissed the Prince of Devildom.

Her body just moved on its own. Lucifer stepped out for a moment and she leaned in to show Diavolo something cute from the human realm. And she peers over and sees that his attention is very much on her and not the phone where a bird is chirping the Star Wars theme.

What shocks her than her own boldness… Diavolo kisses her back. More gently than any human has before and she so just wants to fall into his touch and savor the moment.

But embarrassment kicks in. Because what is she doing? Because Lucifer is still in the general vicinity and Verona would be launched into week long cooking duty on top of the punishment from her and Mammon’s concert escapades the week before. And surely Barbatos would not hesitate to enchant her shoes if she proved to be a distraction.

Verona pulls away quickly, heart in her throat, mind racing because: What the Hell have I just done. Softly she murmurs, “Sorry, I’ll leave.”

But the Prince simply smiles up to her, temptation glistening in his golden eyes as she leaves so quick that Verona doesn’t even catch his response.

Verona doesn’t even realize that she had left her DDD behind until Lucifer returns it that night with a simple warning: Be more careful. Leaving her to wonder if Diavolo told him or if he simply doesn’t want to have to replace another phone.

But later that evening, her DDD vibrates with a single emoji from Diavolo and her cheeks heat up as she simply sends one back.

Moments pass and somehow the conversation evolves. He already knows the bare minimum about Verona and her life (whatever Barbatos had looked into prior to her invitation to the Devildom) and she knows the bare minimum of his and what she’d been allowed to know.

He asks about her tattoos and piercings, curious about the length of time she had to sit for, how long it took Verona to heal since demons tend to heal quicker and there are more painless applications of tattoos and body modifications in the Devildom. Diavolo also asks about what Verona did in the human realm (a barista), if she liked it (not really, but it paid rent and some bills), and what she wants to do once the year is over (she doesn’t have the drive to tell him that she’d rather stay in the Devildom if she could just retrieve her pets. She tells him she’d nap, cuddle with her cat, and return to work).

Diavolo finally inquires about Verona’s family and finally she pauses. Because she hadn’t spoken to her family in years. Not willingly, at least.

The phone buzzes again, leaving Verona that she had left Diavolo hanging.

[??? Sticker]

Verona hesitates. Then sends: Sorry, I’m sleepy. (a lie) We don’t speak much.

His response comes swiftly: I apologize, Verona. Then immediately after: It is late, so I’ll let you get some sleep.

Verona glances at the alarm clock, the numbers blinking 11:01 PM, nowhere near her self-imposed bedtime of at least 3AM, and she wonders what he’s still doing awake although the answer is probably the same as Lucifer’s.

But she inquiries anyway: Are you in bed too? Which immediately after sending it she realizes holy shit, that’s a bit intrusive despite the curiosity spiking anyway. But he responds with a laughing demon emoji then promptly: Not yet. I’m still wrapping up paperwork before I can wind down. And again: But Verona!

Verona waited for the next round of messages, checking her connection until LORD DIAVOLO flashed across the screen as her phone vibrated. Panic clenched her stomach and she nearly tossed the phone.

He knows you’re available, dumbass, Verona chastised, her hatred of speaking on the phone and nervousness over Diavolo calling at all spiraled together. Quickly, she stood on the bed as there was a knock at her bedroom door, ignoring it she pressed the phone to her ear, “Hello?”

“Verona!” Diavolo’s voice boomed from the other line.

The door opened and Asmo entered, thankfully noticing her state before announcing himself. His eyebrows rose, he held up a bag with the label of an expensive skincare line, Verona waved her free hand.

“Verona?” Diavolo tried again, “Are you there? I have a proposal.”

“Yes, my lord,” Verona practically kicked Asmodeus as an excited expression formed on his face. Asmo jumped on the bed and pressed himself near the phone despite Verona’s valiant attempt to cover his lips, “I’m still here.”

“Wonderful!” Diavolo continued, clearly not clued into the desperate swatting away of Asmo on Verona’s end. “I have some down time tomorrow evening. Would you like to join me for tea? We can discuss what happened earlier.”

Asmo broke away, quickly mouthing, “What happened?”

“I’m not sure, my lord.” Verona answered quickly, the words souring, “It was out of—”

“Oh!” Diavolo cut her off, “I’m not angry, it was quite nice. Refreshing, even, Verona. We can do it properly even.”

Verona reached up and attempted to cover Asmo’s lips, her own cheeks burning, “That… That sounds nice.”

“Perfect, I’ll send Barbatos for you after class,” Diavolo murmurs, voice like honey in her ear. “Goodnight, Verona.”

“Goodnight, Diavolo.” Verona quickly hung up.

Asmo grinned and swiped the phone, dragging her back to the bed, “What did you do, V? That Diavolo wants to do again?”

“Nothing!”

“Liar.”

Verona stared and flopped back with a frown, “I kissed Diavolo.”

“Naughty Verona!” Asmodeus gushed, “Does Lucifer know? Well I suppose not since you’re not searching for cobwebs to clean. But what are you going to wear? Do you need lingerie? Also, don’t frown, love, it causes wrinkles.”

Verona rolled over and huffed into her pillow, “It’s tea, not… not… fuck.”

“It could be, V,” The Avatar of Lust tried unhelpfully. “At least wear something cute under your uniform. It’ll make you feel good.”

“I’m not wearing something cute, Asmo.”

XXX

Verona wore something cute under her uniform. It hadn’t helped with her anxiousness throughout her classes, but it did make her feel less bad over Asmodeus spoiling her with cute items considering she never really got the chance to wear them.

After her last class, Barbatos met her at the end of the hall and she quietly followed him through the winding building until they came to a portal.

“Are we not going to Lord Diavolo’s office?” Verona asked cautiously.

“He requested that you meet him in the palace gardens for tea,” Barbatos offered his arm. “Ready?”

With a nod, Verona wrapped a hand around his forearm and nearly toppled over at the sudden change of setting. The dark, candlelit halls of RAD instantly replaced with lush gardens filled with flowers and plants native to Devildom that Verona hadn’t seen in her months as an exchange student.

Barbatos steadied her then allowed her to look around, Verona cautiously followed a dark bricked path, sure that many of the unknown plants could probably eat her if she so much as nudged them.

“These are relatively safe plants,” Diavolo’s gentle voice noted as Verona came to a better lit area with blackened floating lanterns. “Barbatos keeps anything remotely dangerous in his personal garden.”

“Relatively, though?” Verona paused to blink up at the lanterns, eyes adjusting a realizing that they weren’t lanterns at all. They were lightning bugs, probably the size of her fist, hovering around and resting on pale flowers.

“I suppose I wouldn’t try to eat them,” Diavolo muses, then motions to the seat across from the oversized garden table. “Have a seat, Verona.”

Verona sits and focuses on the sandwiches, the tea, the fine china. Everything except Diavolo seated across from her simply watching as Barbatos pours a blue-ish tinged tea then takes his leave. Verona quietly takes a sip, noting the bitterness before dropping a single sugar cube in. She finally breaks the silence, “How was your day? Or is it technically still going?”

“It seems to be picking up,” Diavolo offers. “How was yours? You had an exam in History of Devildom today, didn’t you?”

“I did,” Verona exhales, cheeks heating up, “But I didn’t do as well as I hoped. My mind was… elsewhere, I guess.”

“I suppose I should’ve accounted for that. We could’ve met earlier this morning, but I believe I start my day a bit earlier that it would inconvenience you.” Diavolo hums, “I could request that you be allowed to retake it.”

“Oh, no!” Verona rubs her cheeks to calm herself, “I keep my grade high enough that it should be fine.” Then adds, “Thank you though.”

They fall back into heavy silence. Verona picks at a sandwich before sighing and shooing away the anxiety, “I’m sorry for yesterday. It just… I don’t know… You were close and…” I think you’re lowkey gorgeous, Verona nearly admits.

“You’re a very anxious little human, Verona. But only with me.” A gentle smile pulls at the Prince of Devildom’s lips, “Why is that? You’re perfectly chaotic with Lucifer and the other brothers. The angels, even.”

“I…” A lump twisted at her throat as she racked her brain for a coherent answer, “I think it might be an, I don’t know, authority issue. You’re very much attractive… but very much above me. It makes me nervous. I don’t like to put myself in situations that might not go right for me.”

“But you did yesterday?” Diavolo tries, eyes ghosting over her.

“I guess I did,” Verona stares down at her tea.

“What would remedy this situation, Verona?” Diavolo asks quietly, “What would make you feel better?”

Verona wanted to sink into the garden and melt into the other levels of the Devildom. She sighs and focuses on one of the lightning bugs at the edge of the table, “I don’t know,”

“Would you like to hold one?” Diavolo asks softly, cutting through her thoughts, “They aren’t dangerous to humans.”

Verona only nods and Diavolo rises to offer his hand. She takes it and he leads her to the center of the lush garden. He stands behind her and Verona is hyperaware that he towers over her barely five foot nothing form and even more aware that his cologne makes her head spin in the best way.

Diavolo raises his hand with a bit of sandwich in the center. It takes a moment but one of the creatures flits around before settling on his hand and poking at the bread and gently flapping its lit up wings.

“Put your hand near mine.”

And Verona does. The creature buzzes but transfers hands as it finishes the spec of sandwich.

“You’re very lovely, Verona,” Diavolo places his hand under hers. “Maybe the loveliest thing I’ve seen in centuries. The most interesting creature by far that has landed in my sight.”

The bug flits away, but Verona doesn’t move, “Maybe?”

“Definitely,” Diavolo amends, . “You’re nervous around me, yet you don’t hesitate to message me to take breaks and send me animal videos. Even offer to bring me, even Barbatos, trinkets when you ask permission to go to the human realm. Not many people do that, Verona.”

“I know you like cute things, you’ve expressed interest in human trinkets and Barbatos likes to use certain brands of foods for meals.” Verona unconsciously tilts her head against his chest.

“Yes,” Diavolo pauses. “But you don’t hesitate to treat me like an equal, Verona. Not like a royal that you bend backwards for, like someone, Verona. It’s refreshing. It’s different. Something no one has attempted to try in thousands and thousands of years.”

Verona is quiet, stomach twisting, “That’s unfortunate, Diavolo.”

“I suppose,” Diavolo hums, gently hovering over bright tattoos along her arm. “Can I touch you, Verona?”

Yes. Yes. Yes. But Verona’s breath hitches, “Do you want to?”

“Do you want me to, Verona?” Diavolo counters softly.

“Then… Yes,” Verona exhales. “Yes, you can touch me.”

His fingers trace over her tattoos, up her shoulder, to her neck and she nudges against his hand. A mix of ticklish and leftover feelings from Belphie’s mishap. Diavolo quietly apologizes, then combs his fingers through her thick hair. From behind he thumbs her lips and she leans into his touch.

“Turn to face me, Verona?” And she does, Diavolo gently tilts her chin up, taking her in, “Would you like to try again?”

Verona lets out a shaky breath and nods, she knots her fingers against his coat to bring him closer. She’s on her toes and he meets her halfway, the kiss soft and dissolves into something sweeter and desperate.  But Verona blushes and pulls away, peering around the garden.

Diavolo watches nothing but her lips, “Are you concerned about Barbatos?”

Verona blushes, but smiles as Diavolo’s hands go to her waist, “He might enchant my shoes to walk me into a different timeline.”

“Only if you want him to, Verona.”

“No,” Verona seeks out another sweet kiss. “I like it here.”