#‘I thought you considered me the standard you should strive for. If so then do as I say!’ ‘That’s not the kind of book I want to go by!’

[clownsnake]

I don’t think hyeonseong needed to remember dokja’s order to think about him if something goes wrong. I think he’s just always thinking abt dokja

and I love him for that

[celaenaeiln]

“always an angel, never a god” and making it about the robins with batman is heartbreaking and all but have you considered:

the robins to the previous robin.

robins 2-5 looking at robin 1. the hero worship, the love they have for dick grayson. they want to live up to “the golden boy” “the golden standard”. they want to make him proud.

but dick grayson himself? he looks at batman, in his eyes he doesn’t live up to his mentor. sure he thinks he’s good, but it’s not like he thinks he’s the best. to himself, he isn’t “the golden child”, he’s not “the golden standard”, there’s too many mistakes, too many sins, to make him view himself the way others view him

“always an angel, never a god.”

Anon are you providing a sample? Drop the album!!

Just - Perfect.

There's actually a time when Damian is feuding with Tim about something and he's like Grayson is the "Golden Child", Todd is the "Black Sheep", and you're something something. He didn't actually say "something something" but you get the point. Damian doesn't like to be forthcoming with his words, but - "We were the best, Richard. No matter what anyone thinks." THOSE WORDS CAME OUT OF HIS MOUTH. The fact that Damian literally calls him the golden child tho is literally ascending me. He loves his dad.

Jason gets fear-gassed once in Truth & Justice (2021) comic and it reveals that one his worst fears has always been about living up to the massive legacy Dick left behind. There's a change in the way Dick is portrayed because Jason is terrified of Nightwing, not Dick. Because he knows that Dick loves him and stuff but Nightwing is downright petrifiying. Because Nightwing and as Robin, Dick created the firsts for everything. The first partner, the first side-kick, the person who created their world. Not just Jason's but Dick opened up the gateway to Every. Single. Hero. That came after him. And he did it perfectly. He excelled in every aspect imaginable and then surpassed them to create the golden standard that every single person that came after strived to touch. Not just for what they should do, but who they should be.

Tim straight up tells Dick to his face every time that Dick is the best robin that ever existed. No squalms, no hesitation, it's just pure fact for Tim. There is simply, no one better.

Batman/Catwoman: The Gotham War: Scorched Earth

Stephanie didn't have a lot of interactions with Dick and she wasn't close to him but she still had a huge deal of respect for him. It was almost deference, the way she treated him. I considered that it might be because he was Batman but she treated Batman very differently than she treated Dick!bats.

But despite literally every single Robin thinking how perfect Dick is, how unattainable he set the standards, Dick himself feels so pale in comparison to his mentor.

I wrote this post a long while back regarding Dick's thoughts of insecurities about bruce to the tune of Toxic Thoughts by Faith Marie which pretty much encapsulates all his worries. But the thing is, even Bruce tells dick how amazing he is and he's so much better than him, and he means it.

There's a time when Bruce fights each of his former robins and he takes them all down easily but he's trekking his way to the last one and he's says "Attack of the Robins, that leaves only the first one. Hand-to-hand, the toughest of them all." He says this all in his mind. Which means when he tells Dick he's better, he really means it but Dick? Dick will never, ever understand the weight of Bruce's sincerity towards him. He always thinks he's not a good enough leader, good enough detective, good enough whatever there is. In his mind he will never be good as Bruce in anyway because for him Bruce is the best person to ever exist. For him, despite everyone in the entire superhero community exalting him and singing his praises, he feels he'll never be like his hero.

"always an angel, never a god."

Anon, that - 😌🤌✨

Glorious. Simply a magnificently apt description.

But you know who this insecurity really affects more than him?

The Robins! Literally everyone else!

You know, there's actually panel about Roy that explains how he feels about Dick's insecurities towards Bruce-

Arsenal Issue #2

And the reason why I brink it up is because I think this is exactly how Jason feels about Dick. In Jason's eyes there is no one better than Dick and it's a nasty feeling that the person he thinks it the best feels inferior to someone else.

Tim also has opinions on the same line except in his case, he hates Dick's unconditional loyalty towards Bruce (yes I'm referencing gotham knights). He loves Bruce but he hates that Dick loves him to the point that he'll follow him endlessly because he has this romanticized, rose-sunglasses view of Bruce. WHICH IRONICALLY ROY ALSO FEELS-

The Titans (1999) Issue #15

Gotham Knights Issue #26

Where it bothers Roy and Jason that Dick would think anyone is better than him, it rankles Tim and Roy that he's being subservient to a mentor he's far better than.

Even Steph was like, "Dude we need you. Where were you?"

Batman and Robin Eternal Issue #2

And Dick's like "Bruce needed me.."

Batman and Robin Eternal Issue #2

He looks so tired, doing God's bidding. But this aligns perfectly with the fact that Bruce has a canonical god complex AKA consistently inflated feelings of personal ability, privilege, or infallibility. People who have god complexes are highly dogmatic in their views, meaning the person speaks of their personal opinions as though they were unquestionably correct.

Literally and metaphorically he's an actual angel because he works as a messenger of God (Bruce in the DC world) and is the epitome of goodness, someone who always offers comfort and aid to everyone.

[raes-writing-space]

Yuji Itadori x Reader *Perfectionist Tendencies Comfort*

Warnings: Self-Doubt, a bit of self-deprecation, one mine swear word? Mentions of other jujutsu sorcerers dying. Not beta read.

Summary: You've been wanting to become an Jujutsu sorcerer and help people your whole life, but you hold yourself to a different standard. After making a tiny mistake (which does not feel tiny to you at all) you start to doubt that you'll ever be good enough. Yuji comforts the reader and tells them that we can't all be perfect all the time, that we need to forgive ourselves from time to time, and we can only strive to do our best.

Word Count: 1, 212

A/N: I don't think I made Yuji too ooc, but sorry if I did? To save scroll time it's under the "keep reading" line.

The frustration from the mission you were assigned with Megumi couldn't seem to leave you, even hours after the mission had finished. Things went by successfully, but you couldn't help but dwell on your actions and how you handled the situation. You miscalculated your cursed technique, the curse you were fighting suddenly gaining a sense of speed it didn't show before. You just nearly missed it, as the curse surged forward towards you and knocked you onto the ground faster than you could really process it. Luckily it hadn't decided to attack you, as Megumi had caught it's attention before it came to that. Megumi hadn't even thought about it, even after you apologized for how you handled things, he didn't understand your apology. He figured that these things happened all the time, and if you were the one to coax out another ability the curse had, it was better than finding out later when it was too late. Still, things could have been a lot worse, has Megumi not gotten it's attention, you could have gotten seriously injured, or hell, even killed. How were things going to be when you were up against a grade one cursed spirit? A simple miscalculation like the one you had could have much worse consequences, and a lot more than your own life at stake. Yuji could sense that something was wrong as the two of you had arrived back at Jujutsu High, but honestly, that's just how some missions went. It wasn't until Megumi had told him about how the mission went, that Yuji thought he should check up on you. When you heard a knock on your dormitory door, you honestly weren't sure who to expect. You even half-expected for it to be Gojo. So when you opened the door to see Yuji, you didn't know how you should greet him.

"Hey, I heard from Fushiguro about the mission. I just wanted to see how you were." Yuji greeted you with a soft smile.

You always appreciated how caring he was, it made him someone you could easily rely on. You shrugged at first, letting him come into your dorm to sit and hang out.

"How much did Fushiguro tell you?" "I mean, everything, I guess… But he mentioned you apologizing to him for how you handled the mission. I didn't really understand it, since the way he said it, I thought things went just fine." He explained.

You sighed, you wouldn't be surprised if Megumi downplayed the situation. From your point of view, things felt like they were messy. Maybe for Fushiguro the mission would be considered a breeze for him, but for you? Not so much. You knew that Fushiguro has been at Jujutsu High for a lot longer than you had, or at least knew more about curses and cursed energy than you were. But you weren't that far behind him, you worked hard to learn how to control and maintain your cursed technique. Yet, after today, you felt as if you might not have been working hard enough.

"The mission was a success, but I don't think that things went "just fine." I made a mistake, and we were luckily it wasn't worse." You told him honestly, Yuji's features showed that of concern and confusion in response.

"What happened?" He simply asked.

"I went to use my curse technique, and I… I missed. The curse was a lot faster than I thought, and it knocked me to the ground, but luckily Fushiguro was able to handle it before things got worse… But that's starting to sound like the typical thing that happens when we're paired up on missions."

"Fushiguro told me that you did hit it though, that you scratched it's arm." Yuji spoke of the perspective he had heard.

You didn't know you managed to scratch the curse but that still didn't make you feel any better about the situation, "Even if I did, that's not what was supposed to happen. I should be better at this by now, I've been wanting to be a Jujutsu Sorcerer for a long time, and now that I'm here, I can't afford to just miss!"

Yuji could tell how frustrated you were, he knew that it wasn't just about this particular mission, that this might have been one of many missions that all happened the same way.

"What if I just don't have what it takes?" You questioned out loud, it wasn't exactly what you meant to say out loud. But if you thought anyone could understand what you may be going through, it would be Yuji.

"Hey, don't say that!" Yuji couldn't help but feel defensive for you, even if it was your own words. "Not everything happens the way we want it to. We can try and predict what could happen and adapt but it's not like we'll always be right. Even when the curse did something you didn't expect at all, you still managed to hit the curse, didn't you? That sounds pretty impressive to me." Yuji tried his best to reassure you in some way.

You shrugged at first, "But what happens when I have to fight higher grade curses? What if I don't even have someone else to help me?"

"Then you just do your best."

"What if my best isn't good enough?" You continued to question, and Yuji paused for a second before replying.

"Then that was still your best. Do you think the sorcerer's who die on missions weren't giving it their best? Everyone's best is different, and it might look different on different says or different situations, and it might look different compared to others, but you're still doing your best. That's all we really can do. You can't expect things to be perfect, or else it would be too easy." Yuji answered after a moment, which made you pause as you took in what he was saying.

Yuji had a point, there were so many sorcerers that give it their all, and sometimes still just aren't that lucky. While it's sad to think about their deaths, you thought it would be rude to discredit them when they gave their entire lives to protect others. How would you be any different in that instance? How would you learn to grow and get better without a bit of a challenge?

"Yeah, I guess you've got a point…" You spoke, really thinking about his words further.

It didn't fix things immediately, but it at least did give you a new perspective on things. Maybe you could at least give yourself a little bit more forgiveness. All you really could do is try your best every day, and try and do better.

"Really? Oh man, I was really hoping that made sense." Yuji let out a sigh of relief, making you smile at how could be so wise and at the same time kind of clueless.

"Don't worry, it did…"

Yuji had stood up, stretching and heading back to your dormitory door to leave you be. You followed him so that you could properly send him off.

"Thanks for checking up on me, Yuji." "Of course, you can count on me." He smiled brightly at you, before turning to leave with a wave of his hand.

[offantasiesandreams]

What about a fluff headcanon of Batter and Zacharie with s/o who is the puppeteer?

Here you go! Though, I did some more general fluff headcanons since I don't think it would diverge all that much! I hope that's alright as well! If not, you can always yell at me in my inbox!

Batter and Zacharie Fluff Headcanons

Batter:

Batter is as dense as Osmium when it comes to anything romantic. He has no clue whatsoever what is and isn’t considered cute by human, or anyone’s, standards, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t try. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery and Batter, once having seen a gesture he liked from you, will try to do the same for you. While he doesn’t initiate hugs and cuddles and the likes unless he feels as though you need either, he’s more than happy to give you gifts or patch you up. Or basically anything.

The moment you mention something bad about yourself, he will be all ears. At first, he’ll let you talk badly about yourself, listening to you intently and coming up with counter-arguments for each and every single one of your doubts. While he may not be too much of a talker usually, when it comes to you, he’s more than happy to dip into his more poetic side and tell you about how deities strive to be more like you. Because he’s not usually much of a feeler, he might come off as a bit cold, but he’s as honest and sincere as it gets.

Continuing from the last point: There are many things he doesn’t understand in the world and even more he’s never seen or heard of before. If you have any special interests, be it something grand or just some random facts about something mundane and ordinary, he’s always more than willing to take in everything you have to say. The only time he might interrupt you is when he has a question as he hasn’t understood something correctly. He’s a smart cookie, and whatever interests you interests him as well. You’re his everything.

Although he wouldn’t admit to it, he’s rather touch starved. Then again, he doesn’t even know that until you give him a hug or a pat on the shoulder. It’s been a while since he had been touched like that, if he ever had been in the first place. While Batter may be very dutiful, once he is done with his quest, he would like to settle down with you, even if he has no idea what that actually encompasses. And even if the two of you just ended up being neighbours, he’d be happy. He just really wants to be with you.

While Batter doesn’t know what he’s feeling towards you, he knows that it’s a strong and positive feeling. As he has never experienced anything like it before, he doesn’t particularly know what to do either. Making you happy makes him feel more accomplished than it should, he has his mission, after all. That and you are both sacred to him and two things he never wants to lose out of his sight.

If he could, he would praise you not unlike angels sing and dance around god himself, praising him in all his glory. Though he keeps those thoughts to himself, he does think very highly of you. Every time he looks at you, he’s reminded that gods and angels and whatnot are real. They have to be, since you’re either part of them, or above them all altogether. So, the moment you praise him? He may not show it, but he’s stunned. Praise from a higher being such as you is honest and sincere and quite possibly more than he ever thought he deserved.

Zacharie:

Playful and flirtatious, he’s likely made some form of flattering comment about you to your face. Engage in flirtatious banter with him. He has had all kinds of customers before, but his favourites have always been the ones able to keep up with him and joke around. Since he’s a human and understands the customs, he will either win and demand a kiss from you, or lose and still demand you pay him with a kiss.

Although he may not look like it, he’s actually a pretty good cook. Having lived in the OFF world for a while now, he learned to fend for himself and make do with what he has. One of his favourite pastimes is cooking with and guiding you. He has gathered many ingredients throughout his travels and keeps attaining more and more. While most of the cuisine may be meat based, he has a few plant dishes up his sleeve as well. Plus he gets to spend time with you, so it’s a win-win either way.

While he may have some muscles, Zacharie is kind of chubby as well, thus making for the perfect cuddle buddy. He doesn’t shy away from physical contact either and is more than happy to initiate a hug or some cuddles whenever he feels like it. Yes, he is not the tallest, but he is the perfect hug and cuddle size. While he hates how short he is, that is one of the few things he prides himself in. He’s usually pretty tired from work, which is why he won’t talk too much during cuddling sessions, but he will gladly listen to anything you might have to say.

While there aren’t that many items he actually has a strong connection to, there is one he would never give away, no matter what: a music box. He cherishes it more than anything else he has. Much like he hides away his face, he hides the music box from other people as well, in fear of it being stolen. However, when he has gained a high enough trust level with you, he will reveal it to you, playing you its tune. It’s what helps him calm down when he’s had a rough day, and he hopes, although he knows it bears no meaning to you, it will help you too.

He can dance, somewhat. While you won’t be dancing a tango with him, he can do the slower dances, such as blues or a slow waltz. His rhythm isn’t the best, but he tries. For the most part, he prefers goofing around anyway. Seeing him kick his legs around during a rock n’ roll dance is hilarious, it’s surprising he hasn’t fallen over yet. Even so, join him, you’re in for a pretty good time either way.

Another thing he likes to do is make a sushi roll out of you. As mentioned before, he has some decent strength and could pick up anyone if he tries. But what he prefers is making some flirty comment, rolling out a blanket next to you and just go to town with it. Once he’s done making fun of how adorable you look, he’ll put you on his chest and hold you close. It makes him feel tall and strong. Plus he gets to tease you for however long he pleases since you can’t particularly roll away from him anymore.

[onhoude]

In the spirit of this beautiful meme post and an earlier short post of mine on Mu Qing that was my metaphorical big toe into the cold waters of this topic, I just wanted to say that I enjoy that Jiang Cheng, Mu Qing and Liu Qingge are non-partnered and may be assumed to have never been with anyone in the past.

I don't mean this in an I-hate-the-ships, or an I-hate-headcanons-about-this, kind of way, so please don't project that opinion onto me, thank you.

While I am especially reserved about commenting on Liu Qingge and his stance on partners because I don't know enough about his motivations, though his main interests appear in martial pursuits and upholding filial bonds and loyalty, or how other Peak Lords generally deal with it, I do like to fumble around a bit more with Jiang Cheng and Mu Qing's situation.

For Jiang Cheng, he isn't necessarily against marrying. In fact, he might actually end up marrying out of convenience for the sake of rearing an heir. It's simply that, and I genuinely mean this in the most neutral way possible, he is incompatible with what he would consider an ideal partner: proper and hard-working, but not outshining him, and kind to Jin Ling. Realistically, that won't happen with the state of the Cultivation World as it stands and how high Jiang Cheng's standards for 'proper/hard-working' as well as how thin the line is between that and still not outshining him in one or more ways, especially with his brisk attitude.

The chances of finding a meek partner who's still willing to deal with that and not eventually resent him for it are slim to none. I read somewhere are previous blind dates of his have blacklisted him? I can't find the source though. You'd end up with a relationship similar to Jiang Fengmian and Yu Ziyuan. This is something he will have to navigate on his own. It might mean the traditional path of proper succession that he was always meant to uphold isn't something he should strive for. In any and all cases, it's a compelling part of him I love to play around with safely from behind reinforced glass.

For Mu Qing, his cultivation and the results of his work are too important to risk for something he would consider far less valuable. As a man who views overcoming his standing and low birth and rising to the top as of the utmost highest of importance, he likely thought that the cultivating path of abstinence is both dignified and genuinely somewhat convenient.

Not only is abstinence an admirable aim to have for a cultivator that aims for spiritual enlightenment, compared to gods who have ascended on merits of their martial abilities or more grounded abilities surrounding civility, but it also keeps his status safe from potential scandals. Any rumours of escapades or wails of broken hearts are irrefutably baseless. There are no descendants that could potentially compromise or implement him either, for example.

But aside from those two reasons, with abstinence Mu Qing denies himself any indulgence even if he doesn't necessarily have to anymore. It's a means of control that may or may not come easy to him, but one he maintains steadily for centuries and definitely serves a purpose to who he is as a person. Though, yes, it lies parallel but is not necessarily linked with Mu Qing's lack of personability and some of his social ineptitude, which is something he struggles with throughout the entire story, I disagree it is an absolute reflection of his flaws and must be corrected, or grace forbids a 'damage that needs healing.' I think it's too ingrained in his personality and motivations to dismiss it as a bad choice for him.

It boils down to that I love their complex situations when it comes to not partnering with anyone, with Mu Qing and Liu Qingge (as cultivators without the ambition to uphold a lineage) most likely to never wed at all.

I'll reiterate that I'm not criticising ships or headcanons. I simply personally prefer that they could be attracted to someone and choose not to act on it because their priorities lie elsewhere, be it in battle, martial pursuits, ambition, or otherwise.

I love that it presents a struggle without it being a detriment to their lives. I love that romance or partnering isn't a focus in their arcs or lives. I love that it's something that can be complicated but not the wrong thing for them. I love that, while they have their faults, it's not that part of them that would need introspection and more so the circumstances and their relationships outside of romance or relationships.

[jarchivussy]

this might be rambly, but i hate this cultural predetermined shame society expects of you? it's in cringe culture, it's in taboo subjects, it's in what's considered 'right' or 'wrong' and maybe this makes me sound like i'm stupid and was born yesterday but i think i'll let go of that taught shame and post this anyway. because you should not ever be ashamed of your body, you should not ever be ashamed of your thoughts and you should never be as ashamed as you are for simply existing. because you were taught a double standard (or maybe you taught yourself): don't judge the other, judge yourself twice as hard instead. so many times i've apologized for something only to see someone else do the same from outside and immediately brush of their apology because it's not something to waste your breath on. and it exists in the 'cringe 14 year old' and the 'weird gross freak' and the 'you' and the 'me' and the 'everyone' because people weren't made to exist for shame! shame only benefits the society where everyone strives to be same and average and mundane and unnoticed! the average human doesn't exist and the non-traumatized human doesn't exist because they're all of us rounded out and made 'normal'! they're not human! we shouldn't strive for inhumanity!! love the soft animal of your body and please stop being so ashamed i promise it'll be ok and people who really love you will love you anyway!!!

[charmedreincarnation]

Why do I deprive myself of happiness? Why can’t I imagine being happy? Why does it feel so odd

I usually answer asks in order but this one caught me eye because I use to relate to it so bad :(!

Happiness is a fundamental part of life. It's a source of joy and contentment, and something we all strive for. But sometimes, for many of us, it can also feel strangely out of reach. We may find ourselves struggling to find joy and feeling almost incapable of being truly happy.

So why do we deprive ourselves of this happiness? Why can’t we imagine what it might feel like to be truly happy in our lives? Why does it feel so strange to even consider the possibility?

When I would experience or witness others finding joy in life, I sometimes feel a disconnection from that happiness—as if it doesn’t directly apply to me. It’s a bewildering sensation that I know many of us are familiar with.

We could be surrounded by the people and experiences that typically bring us contentment, but still find ourselves unable to fully embrace it. The answer to this conundrum is complex, and yet there are often patterns within our daily lives that can help us unlock the answers.

It could be that we lack commitment to our own happiness or feel uncomfortable with the idea of being contented. We also might not make time for activities that encourage positive thoughts, or they make us feel guilty for being happy when others around us are not.

We can also be our own worst enemy when it comes to achieving happiness, constantly setting unattainable standards or demanding perfection. This can create a toxic cycle of comparison, envy, and insecurities—all of which lead down a road that usually doesn’t have a happy ending.

The key is to consciously try to make changes in your life that bring joy and focus on activities that bring us closer to our goals. Allow yourself to take breaks for self-care and find sources of inspiration that you can draw from. It’s ok to take some time to nurture yourself and be proud of any progress you make along the way.

The best part about all of this is that once we become aware of our habits and patterns, we open the door for real change. Happiness is not something unreachable—it’s within our reach, and something we should strive for every day.

But babe It's time to stop playing small and start believing in ourselves and our dreams. We deserve to have our desires, and it's possible to manifest and create our best lives so just drill in your head you have no choice but to let that happen. acknowledge and accept that you are worthy of your desires. You are deserving of love, happiness, abundance, success, and all the wonderful things that life has to offer. We don't have to settle for less than we deserve. We have the power to create our reality and attract what we truly desire, and the universe showed it to you for a reason.

[andypantsx3]

I think boundaries is a tricky topic because everyone has different standard for what they feel is culturally/ethically appropriate. Some people are really protective of their ideas and original characters and would consider it stealing (even with credit), whereas I wouldn't at all.

Ive also seen a fanfic which got so popular people started rewriting it and making au's (with the authors permission) so people swing in wildly different directions. I think taking concepts is alright even if it's a unique one as long as you do your own thing with it. In my personal opinion while you 100% should give credit you don't need permission but generally speaking I think the current attitude is always ask the og authors if you want to do anything similar to their work or transform it/are inspired.

The biggest problem is doing all of this simultaneously, quotes, style, characters and concepts etc. I don't think it's inherently wrong because some people might use it to practice, like in art when you make a master study, but you should ask for permission first or make it for personal use. If you're doing a paragraph for paragraph rewrite it's also just unhelpful for personal growth. It should go more along the lions of how fairytales are retold where it's obviously referential but with your own flavour.

I do think it is a very grey area, and on some level it boils down to individual comfort. I hesitate to act as any sort of arbiter of this matter because what I am personally comfortable with might not be the standard.

I have been really appreciative of the people who have asked me to write things inspired by my fics, but that's not a universally held attitude nor should we expect it to be. And I do think you're correct that credit and/or asking is a key point here, although again I am not any sort of authority on fanfic ethics!!

Liv also brought up a good point in her own recent post about how there's some nuance in that like, a lot of what we are lenient with here in fandom would be considered plagiarism by academic standards (actually pretty much everything we do would be considered so, because we are working with someone else's source material + a set of pre-existing tropes and AUs and such).

So I think we have to take into account the fandom context & communal aspects of our storytelling as well to evaluate cases with nuance and good faith. But there is probably a set of like, best practices we should strive to exhibit when storytelling in a community like this just to be good community members.

Anyway, I am not any sort of authority, but I appreciate you working through this thought experiment with me. I think my personal takeaway from all of this is that at the very least I'd like to be more intentional and conscientious of how I take inspiration from the writers around me (like Willow I know I consistently cite you as the inspo for runaway prince Touya but I never asked to use him lmao. I will do better!! 🙏)

[likecassandra-ao3]

On the Aegon/Helaena/Alyssa marriage issue (and why I don't think it's as obvious as it seems)

The Alyssa vs Helaena question that we've touched on for "Drunken Gods of Slaughter" (both in the comments and in the most recent chapter) is so interesting to me on multiple levels, and I think, again, we need to remember that Alyssa and her siblings only are aware of a small portion of the entire issue, thus we will never be aware of everything that happens from Alyssa's narration alone. While a lot of readers have pointed out that from a political pro-Green perspective where you know the succession-issue is coming, the Alyssa/Aegon match makes more sense, I think it's not quite as simple as marrying Alyssa to Aegon so they bind Vhagar closer to them. It's obviously and aspect and the major consideration on Otto's part but it's not all that needs to be considered about the situation.

I also think it is worth noting that in the small conversation we see between Alicent and Otto on the matter in-text, they argue from two wholly different perspectives - Otto from that of a Hand, Alicent of a mother. Otto looks at only the political aspects and not the personal, Alicent the other way.

So, let's look at a few things:

Firstly, obviously Vhagar is an aspect. The main reason the Targaryens marry each other is a) Valyrian blood being thought to be the catalyst for controlling dragons and they want to keep that power and b) making sure that they're the only ones with actual dragons. It's essentially about owning both the dragons and the ability to claim them. All dragonriders ideally should marry within as close as the ruling branch of House Targaryen as possible (including so that challengers have lesser chance of succeeding to claim the throne). Vhagar and Dreamfyre, which we will touch on later, are both the two dragons of the Greens that should absolutely be part of the family. So, while it makes sense to make as much political matches with having two of the children marry into other powerful Houses, it would also mean giving up a certain amount of control one of the largest dragons in the world regardless of Helaena or Alyssa marrying outside the Green siblings. So, a match made between the four would make sense on that aspect.

For Alicent, it is a factor in this that she herself was only a girl when she married Viserys and her marriage is mostly miserable (within the show canon, which we're mostly following up until the start of the fic). Alyssa and Aegon are running the risk of being very, very similar to that. Alyssa wouldn't be older than Alicent herself when she gets married, and possibly even younger (if we look at Helaena's age during the wedding) and Aegon would already be a grown man by Westerosi standards by the earliest they marry. I think a big aspect of that is that Aegon/Helaena and Alyssa/Daeron are closest to each other in age and I think to Alicent that is something to strive for given her own background. I also think that, in her mind, it is safest to marry Helaena and Aegon as she will be "safe" in a way, as wife to the king's eldest son, while Daeron would likely be kind to Alyssa unlike others due to her appearance. Aegon isn't guaranteed to do that, but has already proven an entire disinterested in Helaena romantically, which might make him less likely to be cruel to Helaena, and also reduce her suffering in the aspect of physical intimacy as he simply does not care for her in that way (even in show we know that Aegon needs to be drunk to even touch Helaena, which in itself tells us a lot about their relationship as spouses).

In contrast to that, Alicent has seen firsthand what happened between Rhaenyra and Daemon and I think a case can be argued that she is afraid of a similar turns of events for Aegon and Alyssa. While the Targaryens are "exceptions" to the principles of the faith due to the whole "Doctrine of Exceptionalism" Jaehaerys forced through to make their incest legal, Alicent (like the rest of the kingdoms!) doesn't support this relationship as something moral for herself or her own family. Thus she might even prefer it if, should her children have to marry each other, it be a loveless marriage based on duty alone.

Further, Helaena is the elder sister. Theoretically it could be seen as "her right" to marry the older brother, and not the younger.

It also has to be considered what kind of message would be sent to Viserys, the realm and especially the Blacks in ending the publicly announced betrothal between Aegon and Helaena to Alyssa, who is seen as a bigger threat to the Blacks. This could absolutely have potential consequences. Further, we already know that Viserys is not opposed to marry Jacaerys and Helaena. If Helaena is free to marry, he might do that regardless of what Alicent wants. Thus, there would essentially be a hostage situation with Helaena on Dragonstone that would bind their hands against the further actions they're basically announcing with the Aegon/Alyssa match, which would basically tell the Blacks that they're planning something at least. This, I think, would also absolutely be something that Otto could get behind on. It is a main aspect of their tactic to go about it in a way where they don't tip Rhaenyra off to what they're doing lest she should prepare herself (though I personally believe Rhaenyra should not been nearly as shocked about this turn of events as she's shown to be in ep. 10). Ending the publicly known betrothal between Helaena and Aegon in favor of Alyssa and Aegon for no apparent reason at all would be akin to sending a raven straight to Dragonstone telling them they're making preparations to challenge Rhaenyra's claim.

Also, on the matter of Vhagar/Dreamfyre: for the dragons, it is established that "dragons grow until it kills them". Thus we could argue oldest dragon = strongest and largest (I have a personal vendetta against the Dragon sizes in the HOTD show so we will be disregarding those in any of my fics lmao). We need to remember that while, sure, Vhagar is the largest dragon, Dreamfyre is the second oldest living dragon. She, by principle, should be the second largest and second most powerful. Alyssa literally claimed the only dragon we know for a fact is stronger than Helaena's. The only dragons who could compare in size would be Vermithor and Silverwing. Though, again, if the in-world principle is that dragons never stop growing, the idea of Vermithor being larger than Dreamfyre, is also not an absolute guarantee in my opinion. Dreamfyre was first claimed by Rhaena Targaryen "as a hatchling" in 32 AC, and was old enough to be ridden by 35 AC. Vermithor was given to Jaehaerys as an egg in 34 AC. Vermithor might be larger than Dreamfyre, but even then, Dreamfyre is the third largest dragon by principle of age, followed closely by Silverwing. I think, overall we can say that these three (Dreamfyre/Vermithor/Silverwing) are about the same size overall. Thus, Dreamfyre being Helaena's dragon is already a huge success for the Greens, considering that Vermithor and Silverwing are unclaimed at this point. It's honestly criminally underappreciated by the fandom due to the fact that Aemond (here Alyssa) claiming Vhagar, in my opinion 🤣.

I think all these aspects of the issue are things that Alicent and Otto have to consider that will inevitably fly over the kids' heads, and thus it won't even be touched on until, perhaps, much later at best. Also, I think we need to remember that whether Alyssa or Helaena marries Aegon - there will be merits to each road, neither is without faul and both will inevitably have consequences that come into play later on.

[indepth-mbti]

I'm sure I'm a SP type as high Se/low Ni fits me to a T in both the positive and negative aspects. But I'm having a hard time telling whether my individualism is coming from Fi or Ti. I usually see them differentiated by Fi=individual values and Ti=individual thoughts, but that doesn't help me because I'm quite resistant form both people trying to influence my principles (telling me what's right/wrong) and my opinions (selling me ideas/ideologies). Can you please help me?

Fi is a subjective function that craves the exploration of its own identity. Fi has a personal moral approach and a strong sense of what's good/wrong from a subjective POV. Fi operates through "Do I relate to this?"

Ti is a subjective function that desires to understand things through their own logical system - even with morals. Ti needs for moral values to make sense (Fe is objective). Ti is precise and operates through desiring to understand things from the inside out.

As I always say, in these cases, you should also be looking at Te and Fe. Don't understand Fi and Ti as isolated functions; look at them as rational tandems that judge reality to form a conclusion. Ti/Fi subjective framework needs a way to express its judgments and that's Fe/Te.

Se/Ni + Fi/Te makes a person who is eager to make their passions a reality. Se + Fi is usually attuned to how reality affects their inner states, and it's a combination that is somehow "sensible" and reactive to the twists of their environment. As Fi doesn't desire to express itself explicitly, that's where Se may enter the equation and make Fi express their intense inner world through a behavior that has an actual impact on reality (that's why xSFPs may have the artist stereotype). If healthy, Se + Te is concerned about making profit of the current situation, these two functions together can be considered the most realistic combo (both Se and Te care about data and facts) and these both functions are direct at tracing the most efficient/fast path towards where they want to be (SeTe goes to FiNi). For ISFPs this may be different, because inferior Te will have a hard time actually understanding the most efficient way to get where they want to be.

Se/Ni + Ti/Fe makes a super opportunistic combination. Se + Ti analyze the outside world, the facts and the objective data in order to understand how all of those make sense all together. These two functions are the embodiment of the "sorting out reality" tactic. If Se is higher than Ti (ESTP) those usually manifest as Ti refining its mental model as problems come, in the moment (Se). As Ti is a subjective rational function, Ti users have a hard time expressing their judgments for others to understand, so they may be good at solving situations but subjective/cryptic at explaining the logic beneath it. SeNi + Ti is resourceful and extremely adaptable, they usually strive to identify problems in systems and are more concerned about the method tan the result (this may actually be a strong difference between Ti and Te). Healthy Se+Fe is skilled at navigating social standards and relationships, but if Fe is low in the stack (or unhealthy) these may manifest as a rejection of the realm of Fe.

[glapplebloom]

Well, since Death Battle’s newest season isn’t here yet...

Death Battle is a great series. Even ignoring my obvious bias, it is the Gold Standard other Vs Series should strive to be. Of course, to be the Gold Standard there should be other Vs Shows on Youtube. And since it’s still a month away, let me make 5 suggestions. Key Point: to be considered a Vs Series in my eyes, it has to be Researched Based. Animation is not a Requirement.

1 - Crypto Xing

The things that scare people the most are the things that go bump in the night. Who knows what kind of spooky story, scary legend, or even creepy creepypasta is out there and what they could do to you. But have you ever wondered what they could do to each other? That’s where Xenunnaki comes in. They do the research behind these creatures and determine who wins by their capabilities and what they could likely do to each other. There’s currently 11 episodes with Season 2 on the way: Slender Man Vs an Opponent chosen by their audience. Will he face the 8-Foot Tall Woman called the Hachishakusama, the more recent Creepypasta in Siren Head, the Movie Star the Blair Witch, or a fourth option that you can write in?

Recommended Episode: Wish-Granting Tricksters | Djinni vs Leprechaun

Basically this is putting the movie villains from the Leprechaun Vs the Wishmaster only the actual legends based around them. There is no fight animation, but there is a lot of interesting information to learn from it. And it may answer the movie version.

2 - Goji Center

Do you like giant monsters? This Vs Channel is up your alley. I’m saying Channel because their series doesn’t really have a name. As you can guess, their specialty is with Godzilla but they have done Pacific Rim, Attack on Titan and even Jurassic Park and scientifically accurate dinosaurs. While there are few Animated Fights, the editing and host is the real treat. Very informative and the editing really is a treat as you see measurements, size comparisons, area of attack and so on. They really explain their thought process and let you know exactly why they think said creature wins. And if they’re not doing Vs, they have scenarios, explanations of creatures and events, lots of fun content if you like giant monsters.

Recommended Episode: Toothless vs Godzilla Battle to the DEATH...Who wins? | 3D Combat Analysis Breakdown

Off the bat, they know Toothless would lose. But the Analysis is more about how well Toothless would do if he decides to not kneel to Godzilla. And it is pretty impressive showing how tactical both Toothless and Monsterverse Godzilla are. It’s like a very realistic example of what an encounter between them would really be like. 

3 - Battle Royale and Limit Break

I’m putting these two together since they haven’t updated in a long time. While Battle Royal promises to return, Limit Break hasn’t made a new episode in 4 years. But still, I believe these two series are worth a watch as they are both, in my opinion, the closest to reach Death Battle’s overall quality.

With Battle Royale, my personal favorite part is of the four hosts, there is one who analyzes a character and has a clear favoritism for them. I really enjoy the stabs they give each other during a character rundown. It really makes it stand out among the crowd and I hope it continues when it returns.

With Limit Break, as I said, it’s extremely close to the quality of Death Battle. The Hosts are entertaining, the editing is on point and even the fight animations are pretty cool. They have a lot more on their channel if you prefer that, but still overall a great Vs Series.

Recommended Episode: Vampire Batman VS Zombie Spider-Man (DC × Marvel) | Battle Royale Bonus and Bubsy VS Gex (Accolade VS Square Enix) | Limit Break 

In my opinion, these two are their best episodes to showcase the overall quality of their work. If you’re not entertained by these fights, I don’t know what will...

4 - FCC (Fictional Characters Collide)

Like the above I do think these are really great hosts. They have distinct personalities and are entertaining to hear on their own. And the fight animations, while some can be a little rough, still are pretty entertaining. They’re even going to have a finale where we’ll see Alucard from Hellsing Vs Vampire Hunter D. That’s a match I was looking forward to seeing behind Alucard Vs Dio. And I’m definitely sure they’re going to deliver it.

Recommended Episode: Deoxys Vs Boros 

This was the first episode I remember seeing of theirs and it is a very interesting matchup pitting two Aliens against each other. And the fight was pretty fun thanks to the inclusion of dialogue. It’s like an actual One Punch Man dialogue with Deoxys incapable of talking back. And the fight itself is pretty fun too.

5 - Galaxy Video

Another Channel Suggestion because, besides their other stuff, they have two Vs Related Series. Multiverse Match which is your traditional Vs Series Show and Galaxy Grudge Match. That series is different in a lot of ways. The biggest being it’s not about who would win in a fight but who would do better in a scenario. So like with Piccolo Vs Garnet, it’s not about who would win in a fight but who would lead a little league team to their first victory. Pretty much, both series provide a lot of fun matchups and Scenarios. You’ll be in for a treat and probably find a new series to enjoy.

Recommended Episode: The Fonz Vs Steve Urkel (Happy Days Vs Family Matters)

A big example of their creativity and unique ideas. They go over everything the two bring into the picture and the fight is just fun. Really enjoyable and showcases everyone’s personalities. The Hosts, the characters fighting, even the robot that shows up. Really fun episode.

And these are my recommendations. Do you have a favorite Vs Series not Death Battle? Like Not Death Battle? Or Smash Bracket?

[lesbionia]

hi! i hope i’m not bothering, i have a question but you’re totally free to ignore me.

though i definitely do not agree on the general radfem view on trans people, i’ve been informing myself about this ideology for a while now and have found myself agreeing with most of it. it has really opened my eyes about make-up and shaving and other issues as these. i was just wondering where should one draw the line? me personally i like my face much less w/o plucked eyebrows, and all the men i know also pluck theirs. i’ve stopped shaving my legs and all, but i can’t let go of the eyebrows, and though i’m working on being okay with my upper lip hair, i don’t think i’ll ever make peace with the eyebrow thing. does that make me a hypocrite? is it inherently anti-feminist to pluck eyebrows in the same way shaving legs and arms is?

i was also wondering about make-up. i’ve totally ditched foundation/concealer/conturing, and i try to go out w/o eyeliner and mascara as much as i can. but i still feel like i’m giving up a way of self-expression? i was always planning on learning eyeshadow and such. is there a way to do make-up w/o adhering the patriarchy? especially as somebody who is considering calling herself a femme, how do i understand what kind of femininity i’ve inherited from the patriarchy opposed to the kind i actually do like? and even if i do like it, can i do it in a way that doesn’t hurt other women?

also, still as a possible femme/fem sapphic, is it anti-feminist to try and make myself attractive to other women with clothes and make-up? because men are also going to see me and think it’s for them? and it’ll affect women who don’t want to wear make-up/dress a certain way?

i’m just confused about these parts of the anti-beauty/make-up ideology (which i totally agree with).

thank you for your time! there are plenty of radfem blogs i could ask but i wanted a perspective from somebody gay who had some sort of experience with butch/femme identities.

Hi! Not a bother at all, thank you for your questions. I'm sure some radical feminists will probably feel differently about these than I do, but I will share my thoughts and welcome differing opinions. 

Personally, I don't know that it's helpful to draw hard lines on these types of issues. I think it's very easy to get caught in the weeds and that detracts from more important things. Moreover, stressing over whether you're doing feminism perfectly is draining and counterintuitive; we want women to have more energy, not less. I think that even the most radical of women give into social pressures from time to time because shit is NOT easy, but we get back up and keep striving to make good choices for ourselves and the women around us. 

The reason radical feminists oppose the beauty industry generally has to do with the fact that it exploits women. It guilts them into thinking they are hideous and in need of fixing, then robs them of their time, energy, and money. So if you're focusing on rejecting harmful messaging and preserving your time and energy, I think you're doing many of the right things. I find it hard to advise on the brow situation because I do pluck a few rogue hairs from time to time and I set them in place with gel often, so I guess I'm not a "perfect" feminist in that respect either. But I have worked hard to embrace my natural (bushy) brow shape and I don't think that this one thing undermines that work or my feminism. 

I don't really know how to address the question of self-expression because I'm not entirely sure what makeup expresses tbh. If the expression you have in mind looks like conforming to conventional standards of beauty, then it's not really an individual expression that is unique to you. Is what you are seeking really self expression, or are you just wanting to see what the hype is about? I don't think curiosity about makeup (or most things) is a crime, but if you start doing makeup and it becomes a regular thing, it may get hard to stop if you receive a lot of positive reinforcement ("omg you look so good today, did you do something different?"). You also may start to feel dissatisfied with your natural appearance, which is something the makeup industry very consciously sets out to make women feel. Just things to keep in mind. 

As for whether there's a way to do makeup without adhering to the patriarchy, I'm personally not convinced that there is. At the end of the day, the buyers are still mostly women and the sellers are still mostly men, and the industry itself is built on exploiting women. Makeup is also not good for you (eye makeup can be especially damaging bc you're putting stuff near your delicate eyes) so I would not encourage any woman to wear it, even in complete privacy. 

Regarding femme lesbians, I do want to note that lesbian femininity is quite different than heterosexual femininity, at least in my experience. For instance, it's pretty common for femmes not to shave, and most lesbians probably wouldn't think of not shaving as being inherently unwomanly (whereas men definitely do). I also don't think makeup is an essential part of being femme, nor are things like acrylic nails or long hair. I don't look at my wife and think of her as less feminine when she isn't wearing makeup, and she has plenty of feminine qualities that I desire by virtue of being female. Nothing man-made is required to make me attracted to her.

On the topic of attracting women, if your feminist values and beliefs are telling you that the beauty industry is wrong (which it is, you're 100% right), then it's up to you to live according to those values and beliefs. Some women do prefer when women wear makeup and shave, but knowing that the beauty industry is trash, it would probably be hard to be in a relationship with someone who adamantly expected you to do these things. Not performing certain beauty rituals is not going to be the thing that deprives you of love, and living authentically to you makes it more likely that you'll meet someone who is actually a good fit. 

[calliopesink]

She’s DOLLY... and she’s KILLING IT!

A Praise for a Resilient Talent

Dolly De Leon, a rising star in the acting industry, has been making waves with her recent achievements. Following the sweeping success of her international film “Triangle of Sadness” at the Academy Awards in Hollywood, she has been thrust into the spotlight. However, it doesn't get in the way of who she is—a passionate driven artist and a down-to-earth person— which has been shaped by the challenging journey she has endured.

In most of her acting gigs in the Philippines, she often found herself playing supporting roles that did not have significant character arcs. Despite this, she remained dedicated to her craft and strived to be a good actor because acting is her passion. Throughout her journey as an actor, she consistently faced multitude of unfriendly and disrespectful individuals, she assured that one of her fortes in acting includes respect.

“Creating and acting should work hand in hand with building relationships with the people you work with,” she said with a proud tone.

She quickly rose to fame due to her exceptional talent, charisma, and captivating personality. Her passion for acting has been evident throughout her 30-year career. Although she initially had smaller roles, her breakthrough in an international film led to larger opportunities and increased recognition. Despite the pressure that came with starring in the acclaimed film Triangle of Sadness, she remained focused on her craft and the impact of her work.

“The pressure wasn't so much on me as an actor, parang that's such a big responsibility to carry around.” she said.

In like manner, Dolly expressed deep gratitude towards her alma mater, the University of the Philippines Diliman. She passionately shared how her experience at the school transformed her life, shaping her views, and laying a strong foundation in acting. The University theatre group Dulaang UP played a pivotal role in her training, imparting almost everything she knows about acting. She also credited the brilliant creative individuals she had the privilege of working with, including Tony Mabesa, Josefina Estrella, Ogie Juliano, and Cris Vertido.

“I thought acting was just something you did for fun but in UP, I was educated on that and I learned a lot from them that acting or performing is a discipline.” she said.

In contrast, being born in a generation when gender roles were the norm particularly in the film and TV industry, Dolly grew up seeing women as a minority and second class citizen. Regardless, she firmly believes that there's no need to double her efforts for any validation as doing her job is already enough.

“Hindi ko iniisip na oh, I have to work harder kasi babae ako, hindi, I have to work harder kasi i have to keep my standards up and to make sure that I'm doing things in excellence and in the service of my job.” she said.

Dolly’s primary goal is to expand beyond the realm of filmmaking. She has been considering a shift toward producing, in order to showcase her diverse talents beyond acting and establish herself as a well rounded story teller.

“Ayun yung gusto kong ma-achieve talaga, kasi for me, ayun yung epitome ng creation, you're not just creating a character, you’re creating a whole narrative with a whole team, and you're part of the process of making that happen.” she said.

Her journey serves as an inspiration to all aspiring actors, showing that hard work and dedication can lead to incredible achievements. Her resilience and determination serve as a powerful reminder that success is possible, regardless of the obstacles in her way. She is a shining example of breaking barriers and defying expectations.

“Don't ever let the industry tell you otherwise; don't be limited by what the powers may impose mon you; don't ever compromise your creativity and your talent.” she said.

Every line that comes from her mouth serves as the great and strong cadence of her journey. Her sturdy presence on and off the screen has indeed broken the barriers and subdued the fears, on her way to killing the industry with her strong goodwill yet powerful persona.

Written By:  Jackielou Almajose & Justiniano Ceruma

Pubmat By: Cathleen Jasmin Marfil

[cmcsmen]

Eve succumbed to temptation because Adam chose to remain silent. Are you also guilty of staying quiet?

By Frank J Casella

In the biblical story of Adam and Eve, Eve is often portrayed as the one who sinned by eating the forbidden fruit. However, upon closer examination, it can be argued that Adam's silence was just as responsible for their downfall. When the serpent tempted Eve, Adam was there with her and yet he remained silent, allowing her to make the fateful decision on her own. His passivity and lack of communication with Eve contributed to her feeling alone and vulnerable, leading her to seek counsel from the cunning serpent. This raises the question, are we also silent in the face of temptation and sin? Do we passively watch as those around us make wrong choices without speaking up? Just as Adam's silence had consequences, our silence can also lead to negative outcomes. We must learn from Adam's mistake and speak up against temptation and sin to protect ourselves and those around us.

From the time he could barely hold a ball, my youngest son has been obsessed with the game of basketball. His passion for the sport was infectious, and I couldn't help but cheer him on as he practiced day after day. But it was a defining moment when, at the tender age of 10, he called me over to witness his latest feat.

With a determined look on his face, he effortlessly made ten free throws in a row. My heart swelled with pride, but my response was less than enthusiastic. "Nice job," I muttered. "But isn't it time to challenge yourself and raise the net to its proper height?"

Like any other young boy, he was eager to grow taller and reach new heights. So without hesitation, he lowered the goal and continued to sink his shots with ease. And as I watched him revel in his "accomplishment," a thought struck me: do we, as men, often lower our standards to feel a false sense of achievement?

I couldn't help but wonder, what would God say to us in those moments? Would He be proud of our mediocrity or would He challenge us to reach for greater heights and potential? As a father and role model, it's a question that weighs heavily on my heart. And perhaps it's one that we should all consider as we strive to become the best versions of ourselves.

The roots of this tale reach back to the very beginning, to Adam and Eve in the lush garden paradise. It was there that Eve succumbed to temptation, her heart left unguarded and vulnerable. And why? Because Adam, the supposed protector of their sacred bond, remained silent as the serpent slithered in, luring Eve with deceitful words (Genesis 3:6). Prior to that moment, Adam had been a strong and upright leader, guided by his faithful relationship with God (Genesis 3:6). He was the kind of man that Eve couldn't help but follow, his leadership irresistible. So I ask you, my fellow men, are you acting as the esteemed priest of your household? Are you leading your wife (or future wife) in a way that she cannot resist?

According to the sacred texts, God fashioned Adam before Eve for a purpose beyond mere creation - he was destined to rule and lead with wisdom and strength. But little did they know that this was only the beginning of their fateful journey in the lush paradise of Eden.

As the cunning serpent whispered its devious temptation to the innocent Eve, it was no coincidence that it was Adam who was sought out by God in the aftermath. For it was he who held the weight of responsibility, the weight of their actions.

Despite their roles being reversed in the tale, it was Adam who would face the weight of God's judgement and bear the burden of their disobedience. As the dust settled and the consequences of their actions unfolded, it was clear that Adam had been handpicked by the Almighty for a reason - to bear the weight of both their fates.

To truly embody the essence of a servant leader, one must not only seek a connection with The Almighty, but also cultivate an understanding of His divine purpose for their life. When this mission is at the forefront of one's being, those around them are bound to reap the rewards. However, our society's values often prioritize self-serving desires, urging us to remain silent and cater to our own interests. This is why countless men in our world today are left feeling unfulfilled, yearning for something more substantial than material possessions such as trinkets, sports gear, and luxurious getaways. These superficial trappings may bring temporary pleasure, but they fail to align us with God's will and distract us from pursuing His heart. It's akin to a referee in a sports game, whose adherence to the rules ensures order and prevents chaos. In the same way, staying true to God's path for our lives ensures a meaningful and purposeful existence.

In a world where toxic masculinity runs rampant, it's not surprising that many men are feeling like they're suffocating. The pressure to conform to society's narrow definition of manliness can leave even the strongest of men gasping for air. When a man can no longer breathe, he may find himself living vicariously through others, desperate to reclaim a sense of identity and purpose.

It's a sad reality that some men resort to wearing another man's jersey as a means of defining themselves. Donning a stranger's name and number on their back, they hope to fill the void they feel in their own masculinity. But what does this say about their own manhood? Are they truly comfortable in their own skin, or are they hiding behind the facade of another man's success?

Asking oneself how they view their own manhood is not an easy task. But perhaps the real question is how do they view their identity in Jesus Christ? After all, true masculinity is not about conforming to societal norms or comparing oneself to others. It's about embracing who you are and finding strength in your faith. So before wearing another man's name on the back of your shirt, maybe it's time to look within and discover your true worth as a man in the eyes of God.

Listen up, gentlemen. The Almighty has set a high bar for us. He envisions us as servant leaders, with hearts aligned with His own. Yet, too often we fall short and lower our standards. And the repercussions of this compromise are far-reaching. It permeates our nation, our society, our economy. Just take a look around you – in our homes, our churches, our communities, and throughout the world – and you will see that many men have veered off the path of being true servant leaders after God's heart.

No matter one's race, income level, or neighborhood, the consequences of lowering our standards leave lasting wounds. From affluent suburbs to impoverished cities, the effects may vary, but they are undeniably destructive. Our society is plagued by a slew of issues, such as inadequacy, promiscuity, emptiness, depression, chronic irresponsibility, family breakdowns, financial mismanagement, divorce, violence, substance abuse, overindulgence, bankruptcy, low self-esteem, and a general sense of purposelessness. All of these stem directly from the mistreatment and disregard of our innate calling to be a man of virtue, as ordained by God.

The resounding cry for men to rise up and embrace the mantle of servant leadership, embodying the very essence of what it means to be a man in the eyes of God, has reached a crescendo. Our society teeters on the brink of self-destruction, desperately in need of a radical transformation. And yet, this metamorphosis cannot take place without the courage and determination of men like you to elevate the bar to its rightful place, where the Creator had initially set it. This platform, along with CMCS and our esteemed Catholic Men's Breakfast and Forum, has one mission: to raise that bar and redefine masculinity in its purest form, in accordance with the divine will. Join us on this journey of rediscovery and uncover the true essence of being a man, one who mirrors the very heart of God himself.

By the time he reached 14, after going to basketball school, my son's love for the game of basketball still burns brightly, evident in his relentless pursuit of mastering the free-throw. With sheer determination, he tirelessly elevated the hoop to its rightful height, effortlessly sinking countless baskets with absolute perfection. Of course, this impressive feat did not come without hard work and dedication. One of our favorite drills was challenging ourselves to make ten consecutive shots without a single miss. And let me tell you, my son hardly ever has to start over. He has raised the bar and set a striking example of maintaining a higher standard. Not by his own might, but by the unwavering strength he finds in Christ (1 Timothy 1:12). In fact, he has successfully applied this same standard to all aspects of his life. And if you follow suit, you too will undoubtedly soar to new heights. It's not a question of if, but when.

[steveezekiel]

IT IS REQUIRED OF STEWARDS THAT THEY BE FOUND FAITHFUL

1. Let a man so consider us, as SERVANTS of Christ and STEWARDS of the mysteries of God.

2. MOREOVER IT IS REQUIRED IN STEWARDS THAT ONE BE FOUND FAITHFUL.

3. But with me it is a very small thing that I should be judged by you or by a human court. IN FACT, I DO NOT EVEN JUDGE MYSELF.

4. For I know of nothing against myself, yet I am not justified by this; BUT HE WHO JUDGES ME IS THE LORD.

5. Therefore judge nothing before the time, until the Lord comes, who will both bring to light the hidden things of darkness AND REVEAL THE COUNSELS OF THE HEARTS. Then each one’s praise will come from God."

1 Corinthians 4:1–5 (NKJV)

• Be faithful in your dealings with God.

- In relating and working for God, you have to be faithful. If you had deceit in your heart, you would be undoing yourself (1 Corinthians 4:2).

- Whatever is going on in your heart is bare before God, everything is known to Him (1 Corinthians 4:5). YOUR thoughts are loud in the spirit realm!

- Know that God judges His people based on their thoughts, not on their actions mainly (Romans 2:11).

• Be faithful in your mind

- Be sincere in whatever you do for God. Be faithful in your assignment (1 Corinthians 4:2).

- Do your work, know that God is watching you: "FOR THERE IS NOTHING HIDDEN THAT WILL NOT BE REVEALED, AND NOTHING CONCEALED THAT WILL NOT BE BROUGHT TO LIGHT" (Mark 4:22 Christian Standard Bible).

READ: Matthew 10:26;1 Corinthians 4:5

- You will be rewarded based on your faithfulness in the assignment given to you (1 Corinthians 3:13,14; 4:5).

- If the motivation of your heart is different from what you do outwardly, what you projected yourself As (Titus 1:16; 2 Timothy 3:5). You might not receive any reward from God: "13 EACH ONE'S WORK WILL BECOME CLEAR; for the Day will declare it, BECAUSE IT WILL BE REVEALED BY FIRE; AND THE FIRE WILL TEST EACH ONE'S WORK, of what sort it is. 14 IF ANYONE'S WORK WHICH HE [she] HAS BUILT ON IT ENDURES, HE [she] WILL RECEIVE A REWARD" (1 Corinthians 3:13,14).

- Man who do not know the motivation of your heart may praise you and commend you on what you are doing: "SO DON'T MAKE JUDGMENTS ABOUT ANYONE AHEAD OF TIME—before the Lord returns. FOR HE WILL BRING OUR DARKEST SECRETS TO LIGHT AND WILL REVEAL OUR PRIVATE MOTIVES. THEN GOD WILL GIVE TO EACH ONE WHATEVER PRAISE IS DUE" (1 Corinthians 4:5 NLT).

- The people may desire that you be blessed, albeit, It is only God who can bless and reward you: "6 WHO “WILL RENDER TO EACH ONE ACCORDING TO HIS [her] DEEDS”: 7 ETERNAL LIFE to those who by patient continuance in doing good seek for glory, honour, and immortality" (Romans 2:6,7 NKJV).

- Strive to please God, not man. Do not allow sentiment in whatever you do and in all you do (Galatians 1:10).

• Be straightforward

- Be truthful and plain before God and man.

- Craftiness will slow down your progress in the assignment of the Kingdom.

- God does not want insincerity and unfaithfulness in your dealings with Him.

- If you are fond of deception, you are not sincere and faithful in your relationship with other people (Ephesians 4:25); you also will receive the same from others, because you sow the seed (Galatians 6:7).

THE people who come your way would always deceive you, because like attracts like (Zechariah 8:16; Colossians 3:9).

- Be sincere with God and fellow human beings. Be sincere in executing the work committed to your hands.

- Always check in your heart, whether the Holy Spirit approves whatever you wanted to do (Romans 8:14).

- If what you wanted to do is not approved by the Holy Spirit, It means God is not part of it, and proceeding further could be dangerous and calamitous (Proverbs 14:12).

- God knows the intent of your heart (1 Chronicles 28:9).

- What you think nobody knows about, is bare before God: "21 FOR GOD'S EYES ARE ON THE WAYS OF A MAN [a woman], AND HE SEES ALL HIS [her] STEPS. 22 “There is no darkness nor deep shadow WHERE THE EVILDOERS MAY HIDE THEMSELVES" ( Job 34:21,22 AMP).

READ: Proverbs 15:3

• If you are always conscious of Man, what would people feel or say, you will never acted right (Galatians 1:10).

- Always have it in your mind that you are dealing with God and not man in all your relationship: with spouse, friends, fellow believers, and the Ministers of God.

- Man can be deceived, but God CANNOT. In other words, you can succeed in deceiving Man but God cannot be deceived.

• Ask God about your thoughts and speeches (Psalm 19:14).

- Every negative thought that finds its way to your mind should be judged and cast down (2 Corinthians 10:5).

- Judge yourself on every matter of life. If you Judge ourselves you shall not be judged (1 Corinthians 11:31).

IF you, however, do not judge yourself, God will, and it might be severe (1 Corinthians 11:32).

• The heart of man is desperately wicked, only God knows it.

- If your heart is right and acceptable before God, you find fulfillment in Life and Ministry.

- A wrong and stinking heart cannot receive anything from God (Romans 1:28).

- Man may not know your heart but God knows. If your heart is bad, your services and offerings would not be accepted: "THE SACRIFICE OF THE WICKED [wrongdoers, sinners, or evil people] IS AN ABOMINATION; HOW MUCH MORE WHEN HE BRINGS IT WITH WICKED INTENT!" (Proverbs 21:27).

- If your heart is right, God will defend you even at the time of danger—when the enemy, the devil, comes to harass and devour (Proverbs 16:7).

• You will not fail in Jesus' name.

Peace!

[counterturn]

A view of morality

Something I see mentioned a lot around the various flavours of internet discourse is people talking about how ‘morality is not black and white’. This is something that seems to be generally accepted by most people (as it should be, given the fact that it is true), but it does not seem to really make much of a difference in how the discussion progresses. It is closer to an expression of frustration than being any sort of help.

I suspect the reason why that is is that while it’s all well and good to recognise that ‘morality is not black and white’, that phrase doesn’t really give you an idea of how morality should be thought of instead. So I want to share how I, personally, think about moral issues. It’s important to note before continuing that this isn’t really a ‘system’ or a thought-out model; this is just what my brain has learned to do and what I find useful. Less of a ‘this is how you should think’ and more of a ‘this is one way to think about morality’.

The good and evil dichotomy, although not absolute, is certainly a good starting point for considering. I see morality as a spectrum, with good and evil on either end and fuzzy, only semi-defined categories in between. When judging an action (which should not be the goal of moral thinking, but it is something we all engage in nonetheless), both the intention and the outcome are relevant, though of course consequence is of the essence. After all, what is better: a good deed done for selfish reasons, or a bad deed following good intentions? And on the other hand, is a misguided bad deed equal to one done with the deliberate intent to harm? These subjective exercises are left to the reader.

Here are my categories, roughly how I perceive them:

Good - Things that are good. Jesus would do these things. To help, to forgive, to be there. We should aim for these things, but there is no shame in falling short and it is unreasonable to hold others to the standard of goodness.

Let me say that again. We should strive for goodness, but not hold ourselves or each other to that standard. It is best-case, best behaviour, best intentions.

Goodness is that annoying voice in your head that recommends always the toughest and least satisfying choice. Do not respond in kind, even if you have the perfect snide remark. Be the bigger person. Help those who cannot help you back. Help those who would never once help you back. Help those who have done nothing to deserve it. Goodness is hard, but good. Hope for good in others, but do not expect it of them. People want to do good, but goodness is hard. To fall short of goodness is not a mistake, nor is it a failure. Goodness i hard.

Do not allow good to be your enemy, only your measuring stick. Never become bitter because you fail to live up to your own standards of goodness, and doubly so for someone else’s. Always strive to be good, even if you never achieve it, and never try to force good onto others.

Reasonable - This is where most of our efforts should fall. Aim for good, but recognise that if you can’t be good you should at least try and be reasonable. Reasonable is goodness tempered with realism and practicality. Being a vegan and causing no harm to the world and its inhabitants is good, but being vegetarian because you don’t have good health stores around or the ones that you do are too expensive for your lifestyle is reasonable. Helping people out only when you have the energy for it is reasonable. Being kind to your friends and not to your enemies is reasonable.

Don’t be so hard on yourself. Good is hard, and even reasonable can be hard when pressed. But reasonable is enough. Enough to make a good impact and enough to be proud of.

Fair - Fair is fair. It isn’t necessarily a good moral decision, and it is the sort of zero-sum thinking that we should want to rise above, but it is a fair decision to make. Much of what we do will fall into this area, and this is the frontier at which we must actively try and fight if we want to be good and better people.

It is a moral goal, at the very least for someone like myself who wants to see the world become a better place, that we do better than just being fair. But fair’s fair. You won’t hear any argument from me. You cut someone out of your life because they hurt you? That’s fair. Good is forgiveness, and reasonable is giving them a second chance, but cutting them out is fair, and I will never look down on your for it.

And sometimes fair is correct. The world is a good place, and people want good, but you will find no shortage of malice if you approach it with naivety. Sometimes a second chance can only lead to a second stitch. Fair is the frontier at which evil meets its match, receiving as much negativity as it puts out. But if all we do is fair, then how will we ever be good? Good is hard, so try to be reasonable. But if you can’t, at least be fair.

Understandable - Do not let the name fool you: we are now in the domain of evil. And yet much of the bad done by ones upon others is not insensate, nor is it random. And let us not for a moment ignore that there can and do arise circumstances in life where evil is necessary. Situations in which goodness can find itself powerless to resolve a pressing dilemma.

A man who kills his daughter’s rapist is not performing an act of good, but the decision is understandable. Resorting to murder is seldom reasonable and hardly ever fair, but where justice fails, acts of evil can be understood and accepted if not condoned.

Understandable does not mean acceptable. Understandable does not mean justifiable. Understandable does not mean proportionate. It just means that you can understand the human reasons why a situation turned out the way it did, including the evil parts. The bombings at Nagasaki and Hiroshima were certainly not reasonable, and they were far from fair. But they are understandable. It is a chain of cause and effect, and hard to see how the situation could have ended differently given how it started. It would have taken true goodness to avert such a calamity, which, as I said above, is not a standard we can hold humans to. Understandable is the nature of tragedy. Indeed, our capacity to understand it is what makes it tragic.

Most of the bad that we encounter is understandable. That doesn’t make it alright, but it is helpful for painting the moral landscape of human society to understand evil rather than just condemning it.

Evil - Evil in itself goes beyond understandability. To hurt others for no reason other than your own gain. To abuse your power for the pure hedonic pleasure of the bones cracking underfoot. To desecrate the sacred precisely because it is said to be so. Beyond justification and beyond the pursuit of any goal lies the land of evil-within-itself. And it is important to know the demon by its name. Evil is not rare. Evil is not defective. Evil is the supreme will of the ego to satisfy itself beyond all reason, and it dwells within us all. In your heart and in my heart, the wicked beast rests, poking its head out to curry favor in response to pain and fear. Reach inside and feel its teeth with your bare hands. Learn its voice so you can recognise its call. Its call to push justice into vengeance. To turn the caring stewardship of your responsibilities into jealous lordship over your possessions. Know the call so that when you punish wrongdoing you can fight the delectable pleasure of power that will wash over you, deep and clear, until even the most reasonable actions face the swift judgement of your cold hands.

Make no mistake, one of the greatest and simplest acts of evil in a world of fuzzy categories and blending colors is to draw a straight line into the sand and proclaim ‘whosoever crosses, even one millimeter, will face my wrath.‘ You will slay friend and foe alike, and never realise that it is not justice you seek but violence, even as the blood laps at your ankles.

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You may disagree with my manner of thinking, and indeed I encourage you to do so! Think for yourself and look deeply into your feelings so you can work with them rather than being ruled by knee-jerks and shallow impressions. The intent of this post is not to tell you what to think, but to give an example of what one perspective of morality can look like, so that you may in turn craft one that fits your own thinking.