#A really cool knife for your baking!

[cumikering]

Neighbour Ghost x reader

2.6k | fluff, mentions of physical abuse If Simon still had his family (part 2)

Simon Riley just got back to the safe house when he saw it.

Tommy Riley, 2 hours ago, 5 missed calls

It’s mum. Call back.         

His heart thumped as the phone rang. “Mum?” he said as soon as the line connected. ”Are you alright? Did something happen?”

“Oh, Simon…” her voice cracked.

His dad had always been an alcoholic ever since he could remember. He and his younger brother Tommy grew up witnessing his antics: stumbling through the door with slurred shouts in the wee hours of the night, often breaking things in the house, taunting them with the exotic animals he brought on occasions, if he even came home at all.

Mrs. Riley turned the other cheek, making excuses for him. As a child, Simon believed her, that people were short sometimes. Because daddy was tired at work, because mummy didn’t cook dinner right, or forgot to buy his favourite beer… Until he grew up and saw the behaviour as what it was.

But she never left, reassuring him his dad would never lay a hand on her. Simon didn’t trust that bastard of a man, but it was her choice to stay and he could only respect that. It was not his decision to make.

At least if he couldn’t bring her the happiness she deserved, he had to do something to distract himself from the hell at home and divert his aggression. That, and he wanted to help make the world a better place. When he left for the military, he firmly warned Tommy to take care of mum and to be there for her if anything was to happen.

Still, Simon spent his adult life painstakingly watching, waiting for the man’s first misstep so he could eliminate that cancer out of everyone’s life once and for all. The day was finally here. His dad had chased his mum about the house with a knife.

“I- I’ve got nothing but the clothes on my back. I walked barefoot to Tommy’s,” she said between sobs.

“How long has this-“ He stopped himself. It was not the time. He took a deep breath, his hand in a fist, knuckles white. “You’re catching the next train to Hereford,” he growled through gritted teeth. “You’ll stay at my flat until I’m back and we’ll figure things out. Someone from the base will call and help you out.”

“I don’t want to be a bother, Si. I just… I don’t know what to do.”

“You’re never a bother,” he said sternly. “I only go back home on the weekends, just stay there. I need you to be safe, mum. Please.”

In Hereford, on a chilly Tuesday night as you made your way down the hall to your flat, there stood a lady fumbling with the key to her own. On the floor laid bags overflowing with fresh produce. She turned as your footsteps approached.

“Hiya, sweetheart. Terribly sorry, but could you give me a hand please? I can’t seem to get the door.” She was middle aged, greying short hair, soft spoken with a Manchester accent.

 “’Course.” You smiled at her as she moved aside. “Don’t think I’ve seen you here before.” The key only turned halfway before stopping.

“I just got here some days ago.”

You grunted before turning it all the way. “There you go.” You pushed the door open.

“Oh, you’re an angel, luv.“ She thrusted a bag of apples towards you. “It’s not much, but here. Please have these as a thanks.”

“That won’t be necessary, ma’am. It’s nothing really.”

“Please, I insist.” She put her hand on yours. “And it’s Melanie.”

You smiled. “Welcome to the building, Melanie. I’m at the end of the hall if you need me.”

You spent Saturday morning baking, courtesy of Melanie’s delicious gift. Even that you devoured the apples throughout the days, you didn’t want to risk the rest going bad on you – you could only eat so much. As you let the pie cool, you cleaned up before making your way to her flat.

It didn’t take long for the door to open. Your smile fell as you blinked at the man staring down at you. His stature huge, almost filling the doorframe as he stood unmoving.

You cowered, eyes darting away. “Hi, uh, is Melanie in?”

“Melanie?” he repeated, voice gruff and cautious. He leaned his forearm against the frame, appearing even more intimidating than the situation needed him to be. “What does this concern?”

You took a step back. “Just… wanted to give this to her.” You held out the pie towards him.

“Who is it, Si?” a woman from behind him called.

The man stepped aside to reveal the much shorter Melanie.

Her face lit up. “Oh, hello, luv. What a surprise!”

“Thanks for the apples, Melanie. I made you this.” You trudged the pan towards her, shifting your weight.

“Come in, come in. This is my son, Simon.” She turned to the man, patting his arm. “She’s the bird who helped me with the door the other day.”

Still with the sharp stare, he gave you a curt nod before you followed Melanie in, placing the pie on the dining table.

“Lunch is almost ready. Would you care to stay, luv?” She made her way towards the stove and muttered, “I always cook too much.”

You smiled. “I’d love to, sure. It smells lovely.”

You helped set up the table as she finished up the soup and brought it out. Simon got himself a helping and sat across you with Melanie beside the both of you. The blond was a few years older than you, jaw lined with a light stubble, but those brown eyes. They were icy, calculating as he glared at you.

Even that the soup was tasty, you regretted saying yes to it as you ate under his scrutiny. Instead, you averted your gaze to take in the flat. The layout was similar to yours, but quality pieces furnished it instead. The large, dark couch in the corner of the living room looked particularly comfortable, behind it a tall shelf lined with books. It was sparsely decorated, and too tidy to be recently moved into without boxes about.

“Do you know if they’ve got a farmer’s market nearby, luv?”

“I don’t, sorry. I get by going to Tesco.” You gave her a soft laugh. “But I can help you ask around.”

She beamed. “That’d be very nice.”

“I do know a bakery a few blocks away with wonderful loaves though. I always buy there.”

While the both of you chatted about the area, Simon was wordless. In fact, he almost didn’t make a noise at all, but at least he’d stopped staring which allowed you to finally relax your back you didn’t realise had been tense. You thanked her again for lunch, and she promised to return the pie pan as soon as she could.

Later that evening, the knock on the door took you away from your laptop. You expected Melanie, but were instead greeted by Simon. Standing a respectable distance from the doorway, he didn’t look like he was trying to scare you this time even that his gaze was as stony.

“Thanks for the pie. Was mint.”

You couldn’t help but chuckle at his flat tone, taking the pan from him. “I’m glad you liked it.”

He grunted, averting his gaze. “I wanted to thank you, for how nice you’ve been to my mum.” He looked back up at you. “She’s having a bit of a hard time adjusting.”

Your shoulders relaxed. “I understand. It’s not always easy going somewhere new.”

“If you ever need anything, feel free to drop by.” He gave you a half smile before turning away.

The blond Mancunian was the last person you expected at your door on Wednesday night. You’d just taken your coat off as you arrived back from work.

“I got greedy and bought too much takeaway. Would you like to join us for dinner?”

You laughed. “Really? Too much food?”

“I’m not fond of leftovers.” He shrugged, inadvertently emphasising his size.

“Well, I haven’t had dinner yet.”

“Mon’ then.” He tiled his head towards his flat, his hands now shoved in the pockets of his black hoodie.

“Glad you could join us, luv.” Melanie smiled as she set the table.

“Hard to resist takeaway.” You chuckled as you approached. Takeaway boxes almost covered the entirety of the table. “Wow, this is a whole spread.”

“I said the same thing!”

“What can I say, I’m a hungry man,” he said gruffly behind you.

You turned to him in amusement. He gave you a shrug, but this time his eyes didn’t look as hard. In fact, you thought you saw a whisper of a smile on his lips.

Later that Saturday as you lounged around on the couch, you looked up from your book at the knock on the door. It was once again Simon in his hoodie, his posture impressive as always.

“My mum told me to run to the shops because we’re out of salt. Any chance you’ve got some to spare so I don’t have to?”

“Salt? Of course.” You headed to the kitchen, leaving the door open.

His fingertips brushed against yours as you handed him the ceramic container.

“She’s cooking pasta. Fancy some?” He tilted his head towards his flat.

“I shouldn’t.”

“Why not?” He raised an eyebrow.

You gave him an amused smile. “I’m starting to feel like a freeloader.”

“It’s the least we can offer in return of the salt.”

“It’s just salt.”

“We wouldn’t be eating without your salt, if I’m honest.”

The smile remained as you shook your head.

“Come, she’s waiting.”

At the stove, Melanie thanked you for the ‘life-saving’ salt when you should be the one thanking her for her hospitality. By now, you knew where the tableware was and started setting the table, but this time Simon trailed, grabbing glasses and closing the cabinet doors after you.

“It’s brilliant, really,” you said after the first bite of the tomato pasta. “You’re feeding me too well.”  

She smiled proudly. “I’m glad you like it.”

“I’m not a culinary prodigy at all, but please let me return the favour and make the meal next time.”

“Don’t wor-“

“When?” Simon piped up.

“Next weekend sounds good?”

“Can’t do.”

You hummed. “Well, I won’t have enough time to cook anything fancy on weekdays.”

Melanie swatted her hand. “Oh, you really don’t have to, luv.”

“But there’s still tomorrow. How does lunch sound? I’ll do the shopping today.”

“I’ll drive. Need to pick up a few things too.”

You smiled at him and turned to Melanie. “You want to come with?”

She shook her head. “You kids have fun.”

Simon cleaned up while you got ready before leaving in his SUV. In the sun, his eyes were gorgeous glimmers of deep caramel framed by long, blond lashes. He’d pushed his hoodie sleeves up to his elbows, revealing his toned forearms – the left one inked.

It flexed as his hand rested atop the steering wheel at the red light. You could see the details from here – skulls and rifles over fire adorned his pale skin. You wondered how far up the monochrome sleeve extended.

He still hadn’t said anything since he picked you up at your door. At this point, you couldn’t tell if he was awkward or simply didn’t like to talk. You tried your luck anyway.

“How do you find the building so far?”

“No complaints. Been there over a year.”

“Really? I don’t think I’d seen you before actually.”

“I don’t really live there. Just on the weekends, if any.”

“Didn’t Melanie say she just got here weeks ago?”

“She’s visiting.” He turned to you. “I meant it when I said she likes your company.”

You smiled. “She’s real sweet. I hope she enjoys her stay.”

When you arrived, he beat you to the basket at the entrance.

“I’ll get it. On you, luv.”

You got called ‘luv’ all the time, but the way he said it made you look away. You couldn’t ignore the tickle that ran down your spine.

On the way to the produce section, the offer sign caught your eye as you passed the biscuit aisle. You reached for the goldfish crackers you hadn’t had in a while.

“Two goldfish are in a tank…” he started behind you.

You turned to him, a brow raised.

“One looks at the other and says ‘You know how to drive this thing?’”

Nothing prepared you for a joke from him, the brooding man in oversized hoodies who barely spoke. You cackled embarrassingly loud in the empty aisle. It was your first time seeing him actually smile. He had pretty teeth, and his eyes finally thawed, crinkles by them.

“That’s a good one,” you said after your laughter died down, chucking a bag into the basket.

The ghost of a smile remained on his lips as he looked ahead. You took it as a cue to move along. He stood behind you as you moved about and picked ingredients, telling you the reason he couldn’t do next weekend was because he was in the military and would be gone on a mission. You didn’t know it, but his gaze lingered on you the whole time.

Before long, you were ready to check out, grabbing a box of English Breakfast tea on your way there. In the queue, Simon stood a touch closer behind you than he needed to, his arm splayed on the railing next to you. You didn’t make a move against it. Instead you tried to make out the rest of his tattoo, but the way his veins budged under the ink from holding the basket distracted you.

It occurred to you people had joined the line when you heard giggles behind the wall of Simon. You couldn’t help tuning into the rather loud conversation. One of the girls was dared to skydive after losing a round of beer pong, and the instructor was “so fucking hot summer came back to Birmingham”. She very much looked forward to their date the following week.

You bit back a smile. You were oddly proud of the stranger. You go, girl.

Simon tapped your shoulder and leaned into your ear. “Why don’t blind guys skydive?”

You only managed to turn a fraction before coming face to face with him. Your breath hitched, not expecting the proximity.

“Because it scares the shit out of their dogs.”

Your laughter boomed before you slapped a hand over your mouth and turning to him fully. His warm eyes returned with his smile, looking absolutely pleased with himself.

The eye contact remained a touch longer, only broken by the cashier calling for the next customer. You whipped towards the lady, gaze cast down as Simon hoisted the basket onto the counter.

He didn’t give you a chance to pay as he already had his phone ready at the receiver, shrugging off your protests. You didn’t mention the fact that he didn’t even pick up anything for himself.

It wasn’t a lot, but Simon carried all the shopping up to your flat. You gathered the bags from him after you opened the door.

You pulled a box of salt from one of them. “Here’s for your mum.”

He quickly took it and looked away.

“Thanks again for the ride. See you tomorrow, yeah?”

He nodded, but stood unmoving. His boots only thudded away when you’ve locked the door.

@tiredmetalenthusiast @shadofireshinobi @keegansshark @two-gh0sts @rowanyaboats

[dduane]

Peter Mum's Soda Bread Recipe

With work around here the way it is at the moment, most likely EuropeanCuisines.com won't be up again until the end of the year. (shrug) Such is life.

With that in mind, here per @the-book-of-night-with-moon 's request is the famous soda bread recipe that brought people to the site again and again for a couple of decades. If the recipe below seems very plain, that's because the way soda bread is done in North America and elsewhere in the world is not how everyday soda bread's made in Ireland. No fruit, no sugar—except for an optional spoonful if the baker likes it: I omit it—no nuts or other similar addenda: nothing but flour, salt, soda and (ideally) buttermilk. (Breads here that do have fruit and whatnot are referred to as "tea breads" or "fruit soda".)

The ingredients:

450 g / 1 lb / approximately 3 1/4 cups flour (either cake flour or all-purpose)

Optional: 1 teaspoon sugar

1 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon bicarbonate of soda

Between 300-350 ml / approx 10-12 fluid ounces buttermilk, sour / soured milk, or plain ("sweet") milk, to mix

If you're using plain milk, add 1 teaspoon of baking powder to the dry ingredients. This is perfectly legit; lots of professional bakers in Ireland do their soda bread this way, without the buttermilk and with additional raising ingredients besides baking soda.

So: preheat your oven to 200C / 400F. Meanwhile, mix the dry ingredients together well in a good-sized bowl, and then add the liquid and mix everything together. Like this:

That raggedy texture you see in the middle of the video is exactly what you want, and part of the secret of getting soda bread to rise properly. You have to get the loaf done as quickly as you can, so that the rise in the oven is maximized; and with minimum handling. This isn't a bread that needs to be kneaded. Just get it into a soft, mostly-cohesive lump as quickly and gently as you can, and shape it into a round about an inch to an inch and a half thick.

Finally have ready a really sharp knife to do that final cross-cut, which allows the loaf to spread and rise fully. Be careful to slice, not press. You don't have to cut incredibly deep: from a third to halfway down the round is plenty. ...There's endless online lore about how this is supposed to let the fairies out. Fond as I am of fairies, I prefer to think of it as letting the chemistry and physics out. (shrug) To each their own.

As soon as the oven's come up to heat, shove the loaf into the center of the oven on a nonstick baking sheet—I used a silicone mat here, but more for the look of the thing than any real concern about the loaf sticking—and bake it for 40 minutes. When you're done, it should look something like the one in the picture at the top of the post. It'll be easier to eat if you let it cool down most of the way; and a lot easier to slice if you put it in a paper or plastic bag overnight.

Anyway, tomorrow, so @petermorwood won't sulk, I'll make soda bread in the farl style instead of the above style that some of the locals call "cake". Farl's done on a griddle and cut into quarters for baking, and its geometry makes it uniquely suited (as Peter's father used to say) for eating large amounts of butter without a spoon. :)

ETA: attn @middleagedandoutoftouch: Check out the gluten-free soda bread from Ballymaloe. ...And there seem to be quite a few more of them out there: try this Google search.

[citruslullabies]

Something to tide you guys over until my break is done

Dogday headcannons: if he was your husband

Not that he can get LEGALLY married to you

Or choose out the ring he would propose to you with

But you guys had a little makeshift wedding in your backyard

You decided it'd be funny if Dogday wore the dress, which he only agreed to since he wanted to see you happy

Yeahhhhh... That white dress tore. Very quickly. Because it wasn't meant for someone of his size

Luckily it wasn't expensive, just an old white dress of yours

(man I hope it wasn't an expensive one-)

Poppy was kind of the priest, and Kissy was the flower girl

Yeah she uh... Couldn't find a whole lot of flowers so there was some poison ivy in the mix .

Very chaotic wedding day!

But Dogday is very happy to be your husband

He is a little more touchy now, but in a wholesome way

(ex. He will hold your waist in both hands while nuzzling his fat head against your neck)

Very happily refers to himself as your husband

"Oh there's some trash on the table I need to clea-" "your husband will get that for you"

He is absolutely amazed that you guys are married

He can't necessarily buy you gifts, but he does try to do stuff for you

Like cook you breakfast

Those eggs are somehow burnt on the outside and raw on the inside.....

He isn't as good at cooking as he was before the hour of joy. He kind of lost those skills after 10 years

Yes he was a good cook at one point

Shocking, I know

Maybe for you he'll try to get those skills back... Maybe

(do not trust this man with baking until you KNOW he's okay with cooking)

He absolutely adores you though

Snuggles up with you more, and is even more protective over you

Didn't even know that was possible

He is keeping his trusty weapon close.

Which by the way! Who was gonna tell me everyone was giving one to him?? I've seen axes and bricks and pipes-

I wanna jump on that band wagon!! I think it'd be really cool!

I feel like he'd use his old medallion

Sharpen the edges, and use it to slice

Or he'd have a home-crafted knife

I like to think he's very crafty due to his experience with children

But either way, sharp objects

(objects he'd keep close by at all times to make sure you and the others are safe)

You will wake up to him by your side every morning, and go to bed with him by your side every night.

He is absolutely smitten with you and will probably never leave the honeymoon phase

This doesn't mean he won't playfully bully you, vise versa too.

But you guys are in a good loving relationship

Shame that you can't live forever and neither can he.

[rottenpumpkin13]

Angeal gets a cooking show of his dreams

*Angeal is cooking vegetable stew*

Angeal: Now that we're done chopping the vegetables, I'll have my assistant bring in the meat we'll be using.

*Sephiroth walks out carrying potatoes*

Angeal: Where's the chocobo meat?

Sephiroth: Chocobos are beautiful, intelligent creatures who should not end up in—

Angeal: You're fired. Bring in Zack.

-

*Angeal is showing the audience the perfect cake recipe. Zack is in the background cooking chocolate sauce*

Angeal: The trick is to not use too much sugar because you want the sweetness to be just right without being overwhelming. Now, blend the butter until it's smooth and creamy...

*The entire pot catches fire. Zack tries to put it out with a kitchen towel but now that's on fire too*

Angeal: Once you have your butter and sugar mixture ready, go ahead and prepare your eggs. Make sure they're room temperature before separating the yolk....

*Cloud runs in with a fire extinguisher and tries to put it out. Doesn't work. Everything is covered in foam but still very much on fire*

Angeal: Next, you'll want to sift together your dry ingredients—flour, baking soda, and a pinch of salt—and slowly incorporate them into your wet mixture!

*Cloud slips on the foam and falls on the floor. Zack tries to help but knocks over a set of knives directly into the fire. Zack then grabs a flaming knife and stands over Cloud in the flames. Cloud is screaming*

Angeal: Finally, add in some vanilla extract for extra flavor.

*Everything is on fire. Cloud is trying to wrestle the knife away from Zack*

Angeal: I thought of adding in some mint for a fresh, cooling effect, but we don't need that! It's not like our kitchen is on fire hahahaha—WHAT THE FUCK? PUT THE KNIFE DOWN

*Sephiroth runs in front of the camera with a sign that reads "SAVE THE CHOCOBOS"*

-

*Angeal is showing the audience how to bake the perfect Banora White pie. Genesis is his assistant*

Angeal: Now, our pie will turn out exactly like this example pie I have ready here. While my assistant chops the apples, I'll start preparing the shortcrust.

Genesis: Everyone knows that Banora White Pie needs a graham cracker crust. It's the only way to properly balance the flavors.

Angeal: A traditional shortcrust is the key to a perfect texture. It holds up better and doesn’t get soggy.

Genesis: Perhaps if you knew how to bake it properly, it wouldn't get soggy. The graham cracker crust adds a dulcet sweetness that complements the Banora White apples.

Angeal: What we need is balance, not an overwhelming sugary taste. Bedsides, a graham cracker crust will fall apart on the plate.

Angeal:

Angeal: Like you.

Genesis: Angeal Hewley you take that back immediately.

Angeal: Why don't you take your graham cracker crust back to the apple farm, Genesis?

Genesis: Maybe I will! And I can bring our audience with me so they CAN FINALLY TRY A PROPER BANORA WHITE PIE.

Angeal: ARE YOU REALLY SO PETTY THAT YOU CAN'T ACCEPT THAT YOU'RE WRONG?

Genesis: WRONG? YOUR LOGIC IS A JOKE!

Angeal: SAYS THE GUY WEARING A RED LEATHER COAT IN JULY.

Genesis: SAY THAT AGAIN AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS.

Angeal: GLADLY. YOU WOULDN'T KNOW A GOOD PIE IF IT HIT YOU IN THE FACE!

*Genesis smashes the apple pie in Angeal's face*

Angeal: ........

Genesis: Ha! How's that for a pie hitting you in the face!?

Genesis:

Genesis: What are you doing with that rolling pin?

Genesis: HEY! PUT IT DOWN! HELP! THIS IS AN ATTEMPT ON MY LIFE! HE'S TRYING TO ASSASSINATE A PUBLIC FIGURE AND END LOVELESS.

*Angeal is now chasing Genesis around the kitchen using the rolling pin as a weapon*

*Sephiroth appears, holding Cloud up in front of the camera*

Cloud: ?

Sephiroth: For the modest sum of two gil, you too can rescue chocobos like this one from a grim fate.

Cloud: 💢

[sailing-ever-west]

bestie and I are planning to cosplay as mihawk and pudding at a con just bc those characters individually fit us well but now I'm thinking about how funny they would be as a canon duo and I need it

Pudding gets a new goth dad immediately that part is obvious

Her emotional outbursts are not really surprising to Mihawk it's just sort of like a more evil Perona so he just Waits and Pudding chills out when he doesn't react much

Like she'd be seething with anger and he just asks would you like a knife for that. We have training dummies. And melons. You could even tape a picture of Sanji to them if you want. Or your mom or whoever

Yes, she would like a knife for that

She bakes constantly and forces Mihawk to try it all to tell her if it's good but keeps making ominous hints about poison

PERONA FRIENDSHIP!! They paint each other's nails and gang up on Mihawk to make fun of him and Perona listens to Pudding's diabolical scheme rants and says "slay girl"

Pudding's wardrobe becomes rapidly more goth

She learns some cool fighting techniques too bc Mihawk is pretty sure the emotional regulation is stored in the sword so that's what he teaches people when they appear in his home in disarray

She hides the third eye at first but Mihawk sees it and while she's trying to cover it up he's like ma'am I have actual swirly bright yellow snake eyes and Perona keeps ghosts as pets do you think I care

I think you guys get the picture lol

[hallow-witxh]

So you want to make permanent runes?

Look no further; I gotchu. Runes are great tools. They can protect, defend, enhance, and so much more. They're genuinely one of my favorite things to use in my craft because they're easy, can be as simple or complicated as you want them to be, and are effective. However, as much as I like drawing or painting them onto things, I sometimes want something a little more... permanent. Something I could hang in front of my window or paste/glue onto the front of a book. That's why I make and use salt dough. It's simple, it's fun, it's family-friendly, and it dries really well. You can even color it with food coloring or add in herbs. You can do anything with it! So, without further blabbing, here's my recipe for salt dough:

WHAT YOU'LL NEED:

2 cups all-purpose flour

1 cup table salt

3/4 cup to 1 cup water

Parchment paper

Baking sheet

An oven

Optional: rolling pin

Optional: thread/ribbon

Optional: dried herbs

Optional: food coloring

WHAT YOU'LL DO:

Preheat your oven to 225F (107-ishC).

Optional: Mix your dried herbs into your salt or flour.

Stir your flour and salt together.

Optional: To color your salt dough, stir your food coloring into water before you mix it with the dry stuff. Ensure it's very saturated because it will lighten considerably with the 3 cups of dry ingredients.

Add in 3/4 cup of water and mix. If the dough is too dry, slowly add in up to 1/4 cup more of water until it's kneadable.

Turn onto your parchment paper and knead until it's smooth, pliable, and not sticking to your fingers.

Optional: If you want to cut out shapes instead of molding them, flour your rolling pin and roll out the dough to a thickness of roughly 1/4 inch, then carve out your runes with a skewer or knife.

Roll out pieces of dough into 1/4-inch wide cylinders and form them into your rune/s.

Place them on a parchment paper-covered baking sheet and bake them for 1-4 hours or until completely dry. If you make thicker runes, they might take even longer.

Flip them over carefully every hour. If they're still pliable, try again every half hour.

Once they're dry, remove the pan from the oven and let them cool down until completely cool.

Once they're cool, they're done! You can now hang them up with string or ribbon, glue them onto things, paint (acrylic paint only, don't add water), etc. Just don't get them too wet!

As you can see, despite the long instructions, it's quite simple! It's also edible if you bake the flour first, so if a curious toddler tries to stick some into their mouth, it won't hurt them - but they might spit it out and make a mess.

Happy making, and blessed be!

Support your local witch on Ko-Fi!

[feyburner]

im the sponge cake/baking amateur anon and omg thank you so much for your words and recipes!!! i will definitely start making little things and try not to freak out and instead embrace this new hobby with all its fluctuations…i will definitely keep coming back here for questions and recipes if you don’t mind 🫡🫡🫡

Of course, anytime. Don’t worry, just start with the basics and build from there. It gets easier and more intuitive every time you do it—and there are SO many types of things you can bake, you’ll never get bored. Don’t like baking cookies? Pivot to cake, pastry, pies, bread. Think about what flavors you like and find recipes that highlight those flavors.

Oh a couple more pieces of advice:

1. ALWAYS read through the ENTIRE recipe at least 2x before starting.

2. Mise en place! Gather all the ingredients together before you begin—so you don’t get halfway through only to realize you’re out of baking powder.

Here’s my recipe for Chocolate Velvet Cake. It’s a deep, dark, rich chocolate cake. Pictured here with Whipped Cream Cream Cheese Frosting, one of the only frostings I have ever liked.

CHOCOLATE VELVET CAKE

makes 2 x 8-9” cake layers

INGREDIENTS

2 cups (240g) AP flour

1 cup (200g) white sugar

1 cup (200g) dark brown sugar, packed

2 tsp baking soda

1 tsp baking powder

1 tsp kosher salt

1 cup (227g) buttermilk* or sour cream

1 Tbsp white vinegar

1 cup (200g) neutral oil

2 eggs

1 Tbsp vanilla

1 cup (240g) freshly brewed steaming hot coffee (or 1 cup boiling water + 1 Tbsp instant coffee/espresso powder)

3/4 cup (60g) Dutch-process cocoa powder

*To make buttermilk: 1 cup milk + 1 Tbsp white vinegar or lemon juice. Stir together and let sit 10 min to curdle and thicken.

DIRECTIONS

1. Preheat oven to 350°. Grease 2 x 8-9” cake pans and line with parchment paper rounds.

2. Bloom cocoa: Measure cocoa into a large liquid measuring cup (for easy pouring later). Add 1 cup (pre-measured or by weight) hot coffee in increments, whisking in between, until mixture is smooth. **If you add coffee all at once you’ll get lumps. Add a little, whisk to a smooth paste, then add rest.

3. Mix dry ingredients: Sift flour, sugars, baking soda, baking powder, and salt into a large bowl (or bowl of stand mixer). Whisk thoroughly to combine. **Sifting really matters here. The final batter is very thin and if you don’t sift you will get lumps of flour.

4. In a separate bowl, whisk together buttermilk, vinegar, oil, eggs, and vanilla until smooth. While whisking, pour in coffee-cocoa mixture. Whisk until smooth.

5. Pour wet ingredients into dry and mix with a rubber spatula until just combined, scraping bottom and sides of bowl as needed to catch any dry pockets. Do not overmix. Batter will be thin.

6. Divide batter evenly between cake pans. Bake 30-40 minutes until a paring knife inserted in the center comes out moist but clean. Start checking at 30 minutes to avoid overbaking.

7. Cool in pans 15 minutes (no longer), then turn onto a wire rack to finish cooling. Let cool completely (1-2 hours) before frosting.

NOTES

- Cocoa: Dutch-process cocoa powder = the ultimate dark-as-night chocolate cake, but natural (regular) cocoa powder works just as well.

- Usually you can sub greek yogurt for buttermilk/sour cream, but not here. It doesn’t have enough fat.

- Buttermilk/sour cream + a little added vinegar react with the baking soda and cocoa powder to make a fluffy but velvety soft crumb. (Think baking soda volcano, but cake.) You cannot taste the vinegar at all.

[ms-demeanor]

my thing is I'm capable of any of this stuff up to at least level 3 and can do them for special occasions and if I've rested enough no problem, but I can't do it OFTEN because it just uses up too many spoons. any thoughts on this? besides practice, I already cook as often as I can (which is not very)

Mise en place your life as much as possible. I've talked about this before but this is what I do to make things easier on myself. My baking station with all the ingredients out and clearly labeled instead of at the bottom of the pantry where I have to dig for them makes it much, much, much easier to bake. My knife strip on the wall and the dozen cutting boards in a rack on the wall and the frying pan that lives on the stove instead of under the counter all make it much easier for me to cook.

Like, a lot of what I've been going through and doing in terms of home improvement/home decor is attempting to configure the house in such a way that large bastard and i can easily do the things we want to/need to do. We need batteries all the time, so the batteries live in an organized box where we can see it instead of in the back of the cabinet. We also need to *discard* batteries all the time, so the battery discard tub is right next to that box otherwise we'll start accumulating used batteries on surfaces.

The instruments that live on my kitchen counter are the ones that get used most often so that I don't need to go looking for them and so that I know at a glance if they're clean (if so they're in the canister on the counter) or need to be washed. The appliances that I use the most either live on the counter or get put places where it's convenient - I don't have enough bowls and plates that I need to use the top three shelves of my cabinet for bowls and plates like my parents did, but I do use my rice cooker twice a week so my rice cooker lives in the same cabinet as my dishes (as does my tofu press, my waffle maker, and the easiest-to-use 16oz food storage containers).

And you know what sometimes i just can't do it. Sometimes my back isn't working or my hip isn't working or i got glutened recently and I can't do much of anything.

I've got a variety of low spoon foods that I always have ingredients for (one recent addition to this list is tofu; i went from eating no tofu to eating tofu twice a week because two days a week i can't really use one of my arms to make dinner so i just prep the tofu at lunchtime and when i get home from the plasma center all i have to do is season and pan fry it and make a pot of rice. And I also make a shitload of extra rice because rice with eggs and sweet-spicy sauce is now one of my easiest and best go-to lunches) and whenever I make a pot of soup (something that I do pretty much every weekend when it's cool enough) I will make enough for lunch that week plus usually some extra to go in the freezer as backup "I don't feel like cooking" meals.

So, yeah I guess what I'm saying is get a good list of low-spoon foods that you like and can keep the ingredients handy for (ground beef goes bad in a week, tofu lasts like a month, i love tofu, it's so easy and so cheap to keep a bunch of tofu handy), and throw out the idea of what a kitchen is "supposed" to be like and figure out if there are ways to make your kitchen more adaptive for you.

Get anti-fatigue mats for your home kitchen. Get a tall stool that you can sit at while cooking at the stove instead of standing. Reorganize your cabinets for maximum efficiency for your needs. (large bastard and I have been doing this both with organized visible storage like wall racks as well as putting his stuff up high because bending over isn't easy for him but it is easy for me).

And also, like, consider if it's worth it, or how it can be worth it. How do you want to be a better cook? Do you want to be better at making meals for large groups or do you want to be more comfortable cooking for yourself or do you want a wider repertoire of recipes - all of those things will take a different path and some will be harder than others if you're wrangling disabilities that make it difficult to cook. I'm probably never going to be great at cooking for large groups because it doesn't really suit my lifestyle and it hurts! It hurts a lot and after hosting thanksgiving last year i needed to use my cane for a week because of how much it hurt my back! But I can work on stuff that makes it easier for me to cook, like having my baking station or keeping my rice cooker in an easy-to-reach cabinet.

[kazoosandfannypacks]

Hey guys! I wanted to put together a list of low spoons foods, and thought you might enjoy it. My primary objective was to come up with a list that requires little to no prep, is relatively inexpensive, and has a fairly long shelf life. There's also a few of my favorite simple recipes at the end. Bon apatite!

Proteins: Tuna/Canned chicken: Canned tuna/chicken can usually last a few years, and you can get it for a dollar or two, sometimes cheaper. It can be cooked easily in a skillet, eaten raw, or added to soups/pasta. Mix with some mayo for a quick tuna or chicken salad that goes well on bread, tortillas, or crackers. You can add raisins or cheese for a little extra variety as well! Breakfast sausage: A lot of meats are really scary to cook with, but I've come to the conclusion that breakfast sausage is designed for people with that groggy, zombie-like morning brain, so it's fairly simple; just pop it on a plate (usually with a paper towel to catch the grease) and toss it in the microwave. You can get it as links or patties, and if you're like me where foods with a hint of flavor are unreasonably spicy, there's a maple variety that's sweet rather than spiced. Deli meats: There's no rule against buying a package of pre-sliced ham, turkey, roast beef or even bologna that's designed for sandwiches and instead just snacking on it when you need some protein, or just serving it on the side with your meal. If it feels weird to just eat sliced deli meat and you've got the time and energy, get some sliced cheese as well, cut them into squares with a butter knife, and eat them with crackers for DIY lunchables. Peanut Butter: Peanut butter is an excellent source of protein, and you can eat it on bread, crackers, tortillas, celery, pancakes, or even just on its own on a spoon! If you don't like the texture, you can mix it into something else like oatmeal, sauces, or pancake batter. If you don't like the flavor, try it with a little cinnamon sugar (put cinnamon and sugar in a jar or shaker and shake it until incorporated.) If you've got a peanut allergy, alternative butters are good too, but often separate if you leave them out for too long, but are much better in baking than on their own. Eggs: Making eggs is hard sometimes, but you can boil a bunch in advance and leave them in the fridge for when you need them (not too many or for too long, though.) Just put them in water and bring it to a boil; once the eggs start to float, leave them there for ten minutes. Once they're done, drain them and leave them in cold water for ten minutes to cool. Either peel in advance if you've got the time, or peel as needed. Store in an airtight container in the fridge.

Dairy: Sliced Cheese: Just like with deli meats above, you can get sliced cheese to chomp on when you need a little boost. There's a lot of flavors to choose from! Shredded Cheese: Shredded cheese is great for sprinkling onto your meals or just snacking on handfuls of. You can also throw some onto some tortilla chips and pop 'em in the microwave for ~30 seconds to make quick, cheap nachos. Cheese sticks: Not a fan of eating slices or shreds of cheese? Cheese sticks are much more snackable and can be eaten on the go! Yogurt: You can eat it as is, or you can mix in frozen fruits and honey to create an almost ice-cream like treat! Chocolate Milk: A carton of chocolate milk that you are going to drink is better for you than a carton of regular milk that is going to go bad because you can't bring yourself to drink it. If you're like me and milk leaves a weird taste in your mouth, try following it with water or finishing the milk before you finish the rest of your meal. Cream Cheese: You can put this stuff on anything, guys. Bagels? Crackers? Toast? English Muffins? Tortillas? Regular muffins? Cookies, even? Go crazy! Cottage cheese: A lot of people like cottage cheese for salads or with peaches, but it can also be tasty on its own.

Grains: Crackers: You can eat them as is, you can add cream cheese, nutella, peanut butter, tuna salad, deli meats and cheeses, or you could dip them in a spread like hummus, guac, or ranch. Tortillas: Sometimes bread can be Scary and Evil and there's no way you're gonna eat a whole loaf before it goes bad. I get it. Tortillas last longer, they're a better texture, and it's only eight servings per bag. Use them whenever you'd make a sandwich- pb&j, ham & cheese, tuna salad and more can all go in a simple wrap or roll up. If you're feeling ambitious, you can also make a quick breakfast burrito by throwing scrambled eggs and breakfast sausage in a tortilla with a little cheese. Pancake mix: Boxed pancake mix is simple enough- just add water, or milk to make it fluffier, then cook according to instructions. It's a little time consuming, but it's simple to learn, and if you make a big enough batch you can just pop them in the microwave, airfryer, or even the toaster in the morning for the rest of the week. You can also spice up your mix by adding frozen fruits, peanut butter, bacon bits & cheese, or chocolate chips, or by replacing the water in the recipe with coffee, apple cider, or chocolate milk! Toaster Waffles: Toaster waffles are great for a quick breakfast or snack, but can also be used for sandwiches, or topped with a protein like peanut butter!

Fruits and Vegetables: Raisins: Raisins are sweet, inexpensive, take a long time to expire, and are guilt free— no one in the history of ever has ever felt bad about eating too many raisins! You can easily throw them in a trail mix (trail mix is a loose term; just throw whatever little snacks you have in the pantry into a bowl and mix 'em together,) or a chicken salad, and they're really good sprinkled on peanut butter! Dried fruit: You can find these in the trail mix section of most stores. If you don't like raisins, there may be a different dried fruit you do like. Dried bananas are delightfully crunchy. Dried mango is still a little moist. Find a dried fruit that works for you! Pickles: Pickles are a vegetable with an extremely long fridge life. You don't have to settle for pickled cucumber though; you can find all kinds of pickled vegetables at the store, or ask a friend who pickles (you know which friend came to mind) if they have a jar of pickled veggies they'd sell you or any tricks to pickling your own. Frozen Fruit: Fruits last so much longer frozen, and you can get fairly good sized bags of them for not too much at the store. They're great for mixing in with yogurt, baking, pancakes, and more! Frozen Vegetables: If expiration dates are your worst enemy, consider getting some longer lasting frozen veggies. They can be microwaved or added to soups or ramen. If you're not a fan of the taste, you can hide them by adding some in with the frozen fruit in a smoothie. Canned vegetables: Canned veggies also last a while, and can be added to soups, boiled, or sometimes eaten as is. Canned soup: Tomato soup or a soup with veggies in it is a great way to get some vegetables into your diet. You can also add any canned, fresh, or frozen veggies to any can of soup you have on hand to use up some of your leftovers before they go bad. Tomato sauce: If you keep a jar of marinara, pasta, or pizza sauce on hand in the fridge, you can spread it on any grain you have lying around (bagel, biscuit, crackers, bread, english muffin, tortilla) and add shredded cheese to make a quick and fun pizza. You can go crazy with extra toppings as well! Applesauce: It's great as is, but you could also mix in brown sugar and cinnamon, or add it to pancakes or oatmeal. It can also be used as an egg substitute in most of your baking, and you can even use it as a spread on pancakes!

Quick Recipes: 3 Ingredient Pancakes • 1/2 cup applesauce (or one mashed banana) • 1 egg • 1 packet instant oatmeal Mix all ingredients together and cook on a greased skillet at 375°

Two Minute Mug Cake • 6 tablespoons boxed cake mix • 4 tablespoons water or milk Combine ingredients in a mug and microwave for one minute.

Toaster Crispy Quesadilla • 1 tortilla • 1 slice of cheese (I like to use cheddar!) • deli meat Place a slice of cheese toward the top of the tortilla. Layer desired amount of meat on top. Fold the sides over your meat and cheese (so they can't drip out the sides) then fold in half over the cheese (so it won't drip out the bottom.) Place in the toaster with the open end UP! Toast as desired.

Tuna Bagel Melts • plain bagel • tuna salad (one can of tuna with a few spoonfuls of mayo to taste) • two slices cheese Open the bagel and spread tuna salad on it. Place the cheese on top of the bagels. Broil or airfry for a few minutes.

Cracker Pizzas • a dozen crackers • a few tablespoons tomato sauce • three slices of cheese Arrange the crackers on a plate. Spread a spoonful of sauce on each cracker. Fold each slice of cheese into fourths so they break apart. Place one little slice on each cracker. Microwave for thirty seconds.

Simple Smoothie Recipe • 1/2 cup yogurt • 1/2 cup milk • 1/2 cup frozen fruit Combine all ingredients in the blender. Blend. [To make this easier, pre-mark your blender. Add a half cup of water to your blender and mark with a sharpie to the fill level. Repeat twice. You now know what level to fill each ingredient to without the hassle of measuring them.

[colourstreakgryffin]

Nifty x applejack!reader headcanons

Hahaha! Lol! The contrast here is hilarious. You gotta hyper delicate clean-freak lady than rowdy southern gal that doesn’t care about being dirty! I like it! Hmmm… which means what is remaining is Angel and Twilight. A interesting contrast but maybe it works? I don’t know! But anyway, let’s try this out!

Niffty- Cinnamon Spice

Niffty… well. She is an entirely different creature and honestly, you are too. Which is why you two ended up befriending one another but that doesn’t mean your dynamic isn’t full of just a bit of drama and rules…

You’re a tough rootin-tootin’ fun cowgirl that doesn’t mind getting dirty and Niffty absolutely despises disorder and mess so she is regularly brushing you and dusting you and mopping you of your filth whilst asking if you can simmer it down

Niffty is basically like your Rarity. She gets soooo fussy over your cleanliness level and she does openly clean you off and she doesn’t mind expressing just how much she dislikes how disgusting you are but you always brush it off since it’s just you

Otherwise, you two actually do bond well. Surprisingly, you take care of her like a big sister and you’re a protective strong figure so you won’t let anybody talk shit to the already ‘no-nonsense’ maid and cook of the Hotel

Niffty, you can’t really tell how she feels about anything but she does tell you her thoughts and/or opinions, whilst she is either cleaning you or cooking with the food supplies you carried over so effortlessly in a heavy big crate. She tells you about the ‘bad boys’ she likes and appreciates how you listen to her then give her advice back

Niffty is all about the rules so you can’t really interact with her much but the times you do. She is quite skittering and heads to you and talks to you. She’s getting better with her socialising skills and you merely listen to her

You’re the big sister of the Hotel, honest and hard-working and fearless and caring so you do mesh well with this tiny cyclopian woman who doesn’t really express herself much, helping her whilst she helps you, even if subtly

Niffty does like to ask you to help with her duties and since you’re so selfless yet so determined, you take up as much tasks for her as you can to help around, whilst you’re not a employee… yet of the Hotel, Charlie does consider you like a volunteer, for how much you help despite the fact you don’t get paid for it

Even if Niffty can annoy you with how much she nags and insists you take baths after such a long day of harvesting apples and caring for your family at your home barn, you do consider her a close friend and you don’t want anything happening to her so you definitely join Angel and Cherri’s night drinking to watch Niffty

Niffty kinda likes this southern cowgirl style you got, she thinks it’s cool and she makes a silly little dare where you two trade styles for a day at times. You… you feel weird in a pretty frilly maid dress whilst Niffty struts her stuff as a cowgirl and plays with the precious hat you let her have. It’s cute

Niffty has grown use to baking apple pies since apples is your favourite food and you do enjoy apple pies. She knows the exact recipe you like and sometimes, she’ll just bake one for the fun of it. She knows you won’t say no, she knows how much you love apples. It’s your thing

Niffty just found a odd but pretty orangish-red apple-shaped gemstone in the mess of the Hotel when sweeping one day and she decided to give it to you since nobody else could need it… and she is flattered when she sees how you’ve turned it into a part of your snazzy cowgirl aesthetic

Niffty does consider you a good friend. Yeah, you don’t or can’t talk to her a lot but when you do. She does open up to you, you’re a good ear and you’re quite loyal so you don’t even judge her. She is glad she can show off her knife collection to somebody else than her father figure, Alastor

She sometimes wonder if you even have emotions. Everybody else will be openly upset over a tragedy and you’re just silent… she doesn’t know that you’re crying on the inside

“Ah. Dirty. Dirty. Hey. You need to stop rolling around in mud. You’re ruining my carpet! Ah! Stop! Stop! I’ll get you a apple pie, just go outside and wash off”

[sparklingmineraltequila]

American Wasteland

Note: They might eventually learn to be nice to each other. Very grateful to everyone who's reading and hopefully enjoying, too

Warnings: 18+ Violence, talk of possible sexual assault, alcohol, some pretty graphic descriptions of drug use and needles (if that makes you nervous it's only the first paragraph). Smut and Rust is mean and high as a kite. Cassandra is more than consenting but I'm a firm believer that with the cocktail of hardcore drugs, devastating grief and the overall testosterone fuelled Crash persona he had to embody, sex with him would be rough. Not bad, but rough.

Caramel. Burnt and bubbly, that thick, sticky goo swirling around. Cassandra had made it once, after class, cause she'd see it on the on some bored ass-housewife baking show during a bout of insomnia. Poured all over graham crackers with an extra sprinkle of salt and, when it had cooled down enough, she'd swiped her finger across the pan, letting the golden sludge coat her fingers as she sucked it off. No 'fuck me' eyes, no deliberate dragging of fingertips over pouted lips. No, this was pure fucking indulgence. For a brief, caramel slathered moment of a purely childish whim, her body belonged more to her than it had done for years. Anyway, Caramel. Yeah, it's what Cassandra told him meth reminds her of; bubbling away on that slither of foil. Smoking, snorting, inhaling, whatever: she could tolerate that. Injecting, she could not. Said it made her agitated, that she could almost hear the puncture of the skin's jelly when the needle went through.

That was why Cassandra is so fucking jumpy, now. Through the coke, speed and crass commentary on their supposed sex life, she'd remained calm. Like an amateur form of astral projection, she had described it as while doing their laundry in his kitchen sink, you detach yourself from your body. I ain't really there, just a vehicle for what I need it to give me in that moment. It's just meat at the end of the day. Meat that is serving as a vehicle for a purpose: money, sex, drug receptacle, exercise, etc. A theory that had held up until now; the restlessness of discomfort and boredom making her squirm on his lap. Rust tries to reign her in with a firm forearm pressed to her stomach, which works, until her sharp, glossy nails start to dig into his skin, leaving little half-moons adorning the tick leather of his biker jacket.

'Cool it. Two more beers and I'll take you home,' he mutters into her ear, his forearm pressing her deeper into his chest as he does so.

'You think you're fucking driving after the shit you've put in your system?! Boy, you must be out of your fucking mind. No, I'll be the one driving,' Cassandra spits back, her acerbic tone warranting the attention of a few surrounding Iron Crusaders who can't resist to add in their two cents,

'You gonna let your woman talk to you like that, Crash?' a biker called Razor teases, a lacerating edge to his voice. The cocktail of drugs and liquor pulsating through his bloodstream mixed with powder keg that is Cassandra are putting Rust's nerves on a knife edge. If he was a better (and more sober) man, he might've treated her better, might have allowed himself more tenderness in her regard. But he's not and he can't. Any sign of weakness and the suspicion will grow and fester like mould, and he's not the only one with the fucking gun pressed to his temple: Cassandra's right there with him. Except it won't be gun for her. No, those fuckers will relish in finding a far more sadistic, humiliating way to prove the dominance of the Iron Crusaders. And the worst part? Cassandra's 'punishment' will only be an extension of his own. What's more denigrating than that? That the violence, just like the body it is inflicted upon, doesn't belong to you. Rust tries to justify how he's about to act with that train a thought but quickly pushes it down. He's past the delusion that justification facilitates. Once you hit a dog, you need to kill it. Otherwise, it'll rip you to shreds.

'Trust me, she knows her place. She's just acting up in the hopes that I give it to her a little rougher, tonight,' he deadpans, before grabbing her chin and tilting her head back so that they can make eye contact, 'But she should be careful. Much more out of that smart, little mouth of hers and I'll use it as a fuckin' ashtray.'

Fuck, he sees the pure ire that that phrase elicits from Cassandra's eyes over the whoops of the Crusaders.

'Try it and I swear to God I will spit it right back in your fucking face,' she borderline snarls at him. All this over some needles, baby? Rust thinks, his now non-existent sobriety only allowing his apathy towards her recklessness stretch only so far.

'Cassandra, baby,' he crassly pats her cheek a couple times like you would a pet, 'I'm giving you a total of 10 seconds to shut that mouth before I occupy it with somethin' much more useful for me and much more entertainin' for my brothers than your sass mouthin'.'

'You fu-' she doesn't get the word out before Rust stands up, lurching her body up with him: her abdomen folded over his forearm while supported by a firm hand on her crotch. Definitely uncomfortable, he muses, maybe even a little painful. Though, he'd feel a lot fucking worse if his hand wasn't pressed up against a wetness that is about two hours in the making. He puts her down,

'We're leaving.'

'No, we ain't. My stuff's still in the back-'

'Do you have shoes?' Rust deadpans.

Cassandra glances down to her Tony Lamas, 'Yeah, but-'

'Then you can walk to my fuckin' truck and sit your ass in it. You'll get your shit tomorrow.'

She stares at him and, beneath the gelid fury of her features, he sees a deep, burning desires; that same burning that reduced Troy to ashes. All over one man's fucking desire. That's what everything in this god forsaken world boils down to: that carnal, visceral act of sex. And everything is about sex, except sex. Sex is about power; a power that Rust and Cassandra are fighting for. Oh he sees it in her eyes, all right. Poor baby, don't you know a working a pole or giving a lap dance is one thing, Rust thinks. But Cassandra already knows that dance and she knows this word; her gaze carries the authority of a girl weaned on the milk of a world where icy, serious shit happens. Insatiable thing as always, his Cassandra. Like a sordid, seedy-underbelly inversion of the ingenue blossoming into the woman, Cassandra needs the heady, briny smell of the room, to lick the salt of sweat from his temple, for him to fuck her because she's been cold for too long and the burn won't matter cause fire is fire.

He yanks her arm, pulling her out of the club with him, as he calls over his shoulder to the Crusaders with mean grin,

'Don't wait up for me, boys. Try not to bleed Ginger of all his money, the fucker owes me a rematch.'

Met with some whoops and 'alrights', Rust pushes open the heavy, mirror door and pulls her towards his truck. Wrenching open the passenger side door, he all but throws her inside. When he sits down, Cassandra pounces on him, trying to get a few slaps on him before he shoves her back down.

'Is that your idea of fucking payment, huh? Yeah, let's just degrade the bitch infront of the rest of those pigs. That'll show her who's in charge,' she seethes.

He yanks on the stick shift and pulls out of the lot, now speeding down the road back to the trailer park,

'You know, Cass? You being angry at me would be a lot more effective if I couldn't smell how wet you are.'

Rust braces for the slap, tensing his hands on the wheel so as to not lose control of the truck but Cassandra just stares at him, dumbfounded. A flush creeps up on her collarbones. Whether it's from shame or the pure shock of arousal, Rust doesn't know. He contents himself with either outcome.

'Are you gonna fuck me, tonight?' in a voice so meek and whispered that it should never be used to speak those words. Rust takes as sharp inhale of the Camel he just lit,

'Yeah. But I ain't touching you 'til we're home.'

'Why the hell not?'

He glances back over to her, giving her a one over in those white, lace bra and panties, those endless legs in the worn leather of her cowboy boots,

'I wanna see how wet you can get without me even touching you.'

Very, Rust discovers, as he has her strip off in the middle of the trailer and hand him the damp panties.

'Shit, baby. All I have to do is manhandle you a bit, huh?' Rust murmurs, tilting them in his palm to admire the glisten under the nauseating, yellow overhead light.

'Crash, I-'

'Shut the fuck up and put this on,' he says, handing her his heavy, leather biker jacket. She stares at him before taking the jacket and shrugging it on. Gunpowder, liquor, tobacco and sweat. The cool metal of the zipper does nothing to soothe the burning of her skin, where it rests on the bulge of her breasts.

'Turn around,' Rust mutters and, still staggered by the brazen act of possession he's just performed, Cassandra obliges; demonstrating the embroidered High Speed Low Drag Son of a Bitch and Iron Crusaders emblem on the back. The jacket ends just above the curve of her ass, the sleeves slightly too long: the overall effect should give some sleazy, leather-clad Lolita effect but it doesn't. Not with how his Cassandra rolls back her shoulders, juts her hip and lifts her chin when she turns to face him, again. Those cool, dark eyes regarding him with the wisdom of a girl too young to contain the effervescence of passion and danger that Cassandra does.

'I said turn around.'

She bites the inside of her cheek but turns and Rust lands a stinging smack on her ass, making her jump pathetically.

'Go lie down on your back. Keep that jacket on,' and again, she acquiesces. Once lying down, Rust hovers over her and retrieves the single stack 9mm and a small ziplock bag containing white powder, from the inner pocket. That stirs Cassandra from the lethargy of want she's been under,

'Are you fucking serious?' she sits up on her elbows, the jacket falling slightly open and exposing the contrast of tanned skin with the milk paleness of her breasts.

'With the shit in my bloodstream, I have about an hour before I start getting cold sweats and convulsions. An hour ain't gonna be nowhere near enough time to do what I intend to do to you. So, hold still,' he drawls before placing a heavy hand on her sternum, pushing her back down and scraping a line on one of her tits. She feels a jolt in her stomach before an embarrassing rush of heat between her thighs as he lowers himself and inhales it off of her, jerking his head back as the chemicals merge into his bloodstream, plunging him into white hot, acidic ecstasy. He reaches down and runs his fingers at the seam of her core, rubbing that little nub,

'Where's all that attitude now, baby? I don't have to be mean about this, y'know?' Rust murmurs, now grinding the underside of his palm into her wet heat. Cassandra gulps down a moan as she responds,

'You do,' she half states, half whimpers.

'You're right. I do,' as he smiles that nasty smile again and lands another sharp smack, on her core this time which elicits a choked moan from her.

'Back up, baby. Go further onto the bed,' Rust says before standing to his full height as Cassandra awkwardly shuffles back, the jacket now hanging off of one of her shoulders.

'I should fuck you from the back, that way you might finally learn some fuckin' manners,' Rust says, pulling off his shirt and dropping to his knees onto the mattress. Cassandra scoffs, that usual incorrigibility bubbling up. Fuck, he has her naked, wearing his fucking biker jacket and she can still summon that rancour, the one nurtured by a life of obsolete promises, blood on linoleum floors and the way your first cigarette tastes more bitter than the rest as it's now your only remaining comfort after daddy not holding you anymore. Never one for insipidity, Cassandra spits back, acrimonious,

'What? So, you don't have to look me in the eyes like a real man when you come?'

Rust lets out a harsh huff of laughter, devoid of any amusement, 'All this sass mouthin' from someone who's practically humpin' the sheets for some release.'

Which earns a kick from Cassandra, foot aimed at his nose before he grabs her ankle, hauling her leg over his shoulder; the abrupt movement making her core rub against the denim of his crotch. The sudden friction making her inadvertently buck against him. Rust looks down,

'Either you stop that or I will make you get off with just this,' he drawls and Cassandra doesn't even have the strength to argue.

'Please, Crash, please. You know I'll let you do anything you want.'

He hums, tempted, while he unzips his trousers and pulls down his boxers,

'Your pussy's too good for you to be givin' yourself away this easy.'

'How would you know?' she breathes out.

'Wasn't born yesterday, Cass. Pussy this wet,' he grunts, sliding in two fingers straight, 'and this tight, don't come easy and it don't come often. Plus, since whoever or whatever made you, made you fuckin' perfect in every goddamn way, I doubt they skimped on this.'

She moans, too dazed with fucking herself on his fingers to really notice the compliment. He lowers himself onto his forearms and blows gently onto her seam,

'No, no, no, Crash. You're gonna make me dry, it's gonna hurt,' Cassandra whimpers out, squirming before he brings his tattooed forearm to rest on her stomach, pinning her down. He looks up at her, ceasing his fingers movements,

'It should fuckin' hurt. Way you've been actin' all night.'

'Please, please, Crash,' she sobs.

Rust hums pensively before sitting up on his knees, grabbing a fistful of Cassandra's hair, to yank her head up, and holding out his slick fingers in front of her mouth,

'You don't want it to hurt, baby?' he murmurs in that dangerous, velvety drawl.

'No.'

'Fine. Spit on it,' he deadpans, keeping his hand in front of her. And she does it.

'So, you can behave,' he says, rubbing the wetness on her core, not that she needs it with how it's running down her and onto his sheets. That tart, salty smell; so distinctly woman. We're all just fuckin' animals. Monkeys, Rust thinks. But right now, as he slides his cock into the whimpering mess of tanned limbs and leather beneath him, he feels more human than he has in years. He recalls reading about negative utility: we as humans don't actually really care about pleasure, just minimising suffering. Bullshit. This fucking hurts, it hurts with how hard he is, the ache in his knees from holding this position, the burn of the capillaries in his nose from chemical erosion. He knows hurts for Cassandra, too; way that she's gasping and choking, poor baby probably hasn't got it since prom night. But, fuck, if he wants it. This pain is only whetting his appetite for the pleasure to come, as he feels Cassandra already pulsating around him; like the moment right after he takes LSD when his mouths tastes like blood just before he tastes colours. In this pleasure-pain maelstrom, his definitions start to fade. Yes, he feels more human right now than he has in years, since he has since he saw the mess of blood and teeth on his driveway. Rust looks down at Cassandra, a gleam of sweat on her brow just like his own. As the culmination of living takes over his thrusts and his senses, the only thing grounding him is her voice, like a mantra,

'Crash.'

[bigoltrashpile]

It's my good pal @skelsobug 's birthday today!!! Go show them some love!!!! I wrote this because I know how much they love Sans being a nasty gremlin man, so hopefully this fulfills that! Happy birthday!!!

------------------------------

The front door shut heavily behind you.  Groaning, you slid down the door until you landed on the floor.  You were…exhausted.  Work was terrible, your coworkers had been extra bitchy today, your feet ached, and just to add insult to injury, you were sick.  Not having the energy to move, you just let your head thud against the door and shut your eyes.

“hey babe, how you-ooooh, not good.”  You let one eye flit open.  Your shoulders immediately relaxed, and you felt a small smile creep onto your face.  Even though you were feeling terrible, just the sight of Sans made everything feel a bit brighter.

Sans tilted his head.  His ever-present smile seemed quizzical.  “shitty day?” he asked.

“Yup.”

“damn, ’m’sorry.”  He sat next to you, his own back against the door.  One of his hands found yours.   He laced his fingers in between yours.  “will some cheesecake make ya feel better?”

Shit, you loved cheesecake.  Almost like it was listening, your stomach rumbled at the mention of food.  “.....Yeah.”

Sans hopped up, still holding your hand.  “cool, cool, ‘cause i worked my tail bone off makin’ it for ya,” he winked.

He started walking into the kitchen, and you had no choice but to come with him.  Well, that or you could make him drag you.  Or teleport you there.  Oh well, it’s not like it was far.

Sans opened the fridge, and triumphantly pulled out a pan of cheesecake with his free hand.  “Wow, you actually made it yourself,” you said, impressed.  You half expected him to have a store bought one.

“well, it’s your birthday, thought i’d actually put in some effort,” he winked.  He started cutting the cake, but he was clearly having trouble since he refused to let go of your hand.

“Oh my god, just let go!” you laughed.

“eh, too much work,” he winked.

“To let go of my hand??”

“yeah, i’d have to use like, three muscles, that’s way too many.”

“You don’t even have muscles!”  Despite your protests, you didn’t let go of his hand either.

As Sans tried to move a slice of cheesecake onto a plate, it slipped off the knife and fell to the counter.  “oops.”  Sans simply grabbed the slice with his bare hand and plopped it on a plate.  “that one’ll be mine.”

A soft laugh escaped your throat.  “That’s nasty, dude, it’s all fucked up now!”

“so?  still tastes just as good!”

“You’re still gross.”

Thankfully, your slice made it safely to the plate, mostly intact.  You grabbed your respective slices and as Sans pulled you closer towards him, he teleported the two of you to his room, right onto his bed.

“Jeez, warn me next time,” you muttered.  His “shortcuts” always made you dizzy.

“sorry,” Sans grinned.  “but hey, we’re here ain’t we?”

“Yeah, good point.”  The less walking the better, according to your sore feet.  You sighed happily as you relaxed into the mattress.  Sans had the best mattress, just the right amount of support, while still being squishy.

Now if only he would wash his sheets more often than once a year.

Sans settled right next to you, pressed right against your side.  “how’s the cheesecake?”  Somehow, his “slice” was already gone, and he had cheesecake smeared on his face.

Kicking off your shoes, you took a bite.  It was surprisingly good, a little too gooey, but the taste was great.  “Pretty good,” you admitted.  “I didn’t know you could bake.”

“got some help from tori,” he admitted.  “just wanted to do somethin’ special for ya.”

“Well, that’s really sweet of you,” you smiled.  “I would kiss you, but you’ve got stuff on your face.”

“oh, what, you don’t wanna kiss this handsome mug?” he grinned.  He had a mischievous glint in his eyes, and you could almost sense what was coming.  You tried to roll out of bed, but before you could-

Sans’s arms wrapped around you tight.  He pulled you, squirming and yelling, towards his face.  “Nononono you’re all gross!-”  Faster  than you thought was possible, Sans pressed his teeth against your cheek, less of a kiss and more just rubbing the cold cheesecake batter against you.  You yelped and pushed him away.  “Dude, that’s so cold!” you squeaked.

“no worries, i’ll get it off.”  His blue tongue lolled out of his mouth.

“Don’t you d-”

Sans used his blue magic to pull you closer.  You could only yell in exaggerated despair as Sans licked the cheesecake off your face.  His tongue was cold and slimy and felt very gross on your face.

“I hate you,” you groaned.

“nah, you love me~”

You pouted, but couldn’t deny it.  Even though he was a gremlin, you had to admit that you loved it.  His smug face pulled away, and settled back next to you.  Now freed from his blue magic, you used your uniform shirt to wipe the feeling of Sans’s tongue off your face.  You tossed the uniform shirt away, leaving only your undershirt.

As you did, you noticed Sans’s eyes watching you.  “damn, didn’t think ya wanted to jump my bones tonight,” he winked.

“Shut up, I’m just getting comfortable,” you grumbled.  You grabbed one of Sans’s shirts from off the ground.  It was a t-shirt with a cartoon hamburger on it.  You pulled it on, and couldn’t stop yourself from breathing in the scent of pine and ketchup, the scent of Sans.  A weird combination, but one that you loved anyway.

As you turned back to Sans, he coughed and tried to hide his blush.  “Oooooh, does seeing me in your clothes do something for you?” you teased.

“oh shut up,” Sans mumbled.  He turned away, fumbling with something before turning back.  He was holding a bag from the grocery store.  “a-anyway, i got all your favorites, figured we could watch some dumb reality tv or somethin.”

You took the bag.  Sure enough, all your favorite snacks and drinks were inside.  “Wow, thanks!  But, won’t Papyrus get mad at us for being so lazy?  Or not having a ‘real party’ or something?”

“nah, he’s out on a date tonight.  we got the house all to ourselves,” he grinned.  “we can be as sedentary as we want.”

You had to admit, that sounded amazing.  You grabbed a drink from the bag, and handed Sans the bottle of ketchup he had gotten for himself.  “Let’s watch Kitchen Nightmares, I want to watch Gordon Ramsey yell at dumbasses for a while.”

“sounds awesome.”  Sans grabbed the remote and turned on the show, before he curled into your side.  You did the same, holding onto him like he was a teddy bear.  Sans didn’t seem to mind, only leaning his head against your chest as you pulled him partially onto you.

Sans pulled the blankets onto the both of you.  You let your eyes drift shut, before kissing Sans on the top of his head.  “Thanks for everything Sans, I really needed this,” you mumbled.

“i know, that’s why i did it,” Sans chuckled.  “just relax, ya deserve it.”

“I love you, Sans.”

“and i love ya too, starlight.”

[maleyanderecafe]

Have you tried Our Love is Electrifying by Kactiikitty? The demo released rather recently, it's pretty good so far with a really cool style and some fun customization for the MC!

The customization in this game is actually insane, and in places that I didn't even notice until I looked into the actual game file itself. There is actually two (yes two) love interests in this one, and the UI, artwork and various other elements are really well implemented in managing what the entire game's feeling is about. This is an r18 game and can get be a bit gory at times and you can find more information at @ourloveiselectrifying.

The story starts out with a being who basically works as a customization screen of your character where you can choose things like skin tone, hair length, gentiles etc. You are then thrown off, only to wake up in your bed. Mate (the default name for the character) then decides to look through their dating app to find someone to be with. Mate ends up matching with Kevin, a technician and seems to have a good time by looking through their photos before texting each other and asks for a date. If Mate decides to not text back, they go into a bad spiral before seeing the gash on their chest, causing a bad ending.

Mate can text back, with Kevin asking them their favorite color and animal, which actually shows up as the keychain on Mate's phone. They can also talk to him about some of his photos, like his kitten, his job and his outfit. After this, Mate can do some hobbies, either feed birds, bake cookies, write in their journal or do some boxing. While they sleep, they have a dream of a giant dog who seems to be stalking them. Afterwards, Mate will make a way to the park where they meet Kevin. Kevin will give them flowers and start to talk about things like how Mate's feeling, and what their hobbies are. If Mate bakes cookies, they will also give them to Kevin. Kevin disappears for a bit to use the bathroom and Mate finds them hiding behind the stalls. Kevin will them ask if he can come over.

If Mate agrees, they will invite Kevin over where they can either bang or cuddle. Either way, Mate accidentally takes off Kevin's hairband revealing their ears. Kevin tries to explain, but Mate freaks out, and try to throw Kevin out of their room, which makes Kevin attack them and kidnap them.

If Mate refuses, Kevin will end up brandishing a knife on them. Mate will be able to escape either more peacefully or aggressively and then go home. When going home, they can either relax by looking through social media or smoking a blunt to calm down. Smoking a blunt will lead them to chill in the bathtub for a bit, before Kevin breaks in, with dog ears and then kidnaps Mate. If Mate decides instead to look through the internet, they will find a dog pawing at their door. Mate can then take them in or lock them out. Taking the dog in will lead to Mate giving them a bath and then trying to keep it. Mate attempts to put on a collar onto the dog, but the dog scratches their eyes, and we hear Kevin apologizing, stating that he doesn't really like collars, with proof of it allowing Mate to touch his ears. If instead they try to lock the dog out, he will try to open the door, until eventually revealing Kevin, kidnapping them in the process.

After waking up, Kevin will force Mate to pack up and leave as they are dragging them somewhere to the outskirts of town. Mate can try to fight against Kevin to take his gun but will ultimately end up shooting themselves, with Kevin crying out as they die. They can also attempt to refuse, leading to Kevin kill them himself (depending on affection level) or cutting off some of Mate's fingers. Complying will have Mate pack up various items relating to the hobbies and choices that they had before. They give Mate a helmet with cat ears corresponding to their favorite color and muffles their mouth before driving them off to the new town. Depending on your actions, he can either take a break to snap pictures of dingos, get taken to the next town or end up pushing yourself over, which leads you and Kevin to be run over by a truck.

Playing through each time will lead to you getting to know the entity in the beginning named Spike who remembers which ending you get. If you are nice enough with them, they will end up bedding you, at least until you wake up from the dream.

But yeah, like I said, the amount of customization in this game is really detailed to the point where I didn't even notice a lot of it until I looked into the game's files. For instance, the favorite color chosen is used in a lot of variations in the background, including things like the blanket used on the date, the flowers he gives you, the color of your bed, the color of your keychain on your phone amongst other things. Same goes with the animal, which corresponds to the color as well and the various hobbies can also have certain determinations on what happens in the game and other background elements. For instance, telling Kevin that Mate likes taxidermy makes them a bit sad and we get a bit of backstory considering that the skull is likely someone that he knew (being a werewolf like creature, more on that later) and he even takes it away from Mate if they decide to pack it while leaving. Things like baking will have Mate give Kevin a cookie during their date and feeding the birds will lead to Kevin being attacked by them when they are getting kidnapped in certain routes. That isn't even mentioning the various skin type and couple of hair variations the game also has for certain scenes as well. It's also cool that the player's icon will change based on the animal type and color when chosen.

UI is one of my favorite things in yandere vns, and this one does it in spades with the more road theme. It works well with Kevin's general theme of being a construction worker and the general premise of him on his motorcycle and kidnapping the player and everything adheres to the theme pretty well from the dialogue box and name box (though it is a bit hard to see people's names on there), to the menus, endings and various scenes. I really love the end screen of the jaw clamping closing the screen to show the load, menu and quit buttons and the change in mood from the more colorful and hectic road signs to the darker tones of the wolf form is also very nice as well. Even seeing the heart meter which is represented by the little Kevin (or other character) on the Dingo street is unique and lovely, and the main menu screen really sells the aesthetic even further. Overall, fantastic job on the UI since that's pretty amazing.

The story itself I feel is the weak point, though it's mostly just the beginning part that drags on. I know a lot yandere vns really like starting out with meeting the dating apps and I get that's how they establish the various customizations that are so prominent in this game, but I feel like they're kind of a drag to be honest, like I feel like it should have started out on the first date instead of using the time to just talk on the dating app. It also doesn't really make a lot of sense because Kevin seemingly has already been stalking Mate for a while, so why did he decide to go the long way of doing the dating app, unless I guess Mate has been using it for a while? I just feel like that's kind of a lot of hoops to go through. It's more interesting at least when it gets to the point of Kevin actually showing his ears since it only seems to really happen when he removes his hair tie which is kind of interesting at least and that he's like this type of werewolf creature? I guess, which does make wonder if there are others like him or like if he's connected to Spike for some reason. I mean, I think the kidnapping part of the game is the most interesting. If we look into code, we can actually see part of the second day, where Mate can try to escape or refuse to drink the drink that Kevin tries to deliver them, as well as unused sprites for a cafe date. Which is a cute idea.

Kevin as a yandere seems to have been stalking Mate for a while now, as seen by the various dog dreams that Mate has been having for a while, something he even admits to in some routes. He also has been reading Mate's diary if they were writing in one and besides remembering their preferences, kidnaps them after either being rejected or finding out his wolf form. He doesn't hesitate to hurt Mate if they're not cooperating (as seen with the fingers getting cut off scene), but still feels distraught when they accidentally die. It is kind of interesting seeing that he has some sort of trauma being collared, as he basically blinds Mate if they do try to collar him in his dog form, which hopefully will be explored in the future. The idea of him being like a electrician or construction worker is a pretty cool idea I will since it's unique as a profession. Not sure exactly how it would follow into the entire yandere idea, but I'm sure the game surprise. One of the things that does bother me besides the weird hoops that Kevin has to go through to meet Mate on the dating app (which, why did he do that? I feel like there are easier ways to meet up with the person you want to date when you've been stalking them for a while) is the comparison from his dog form to his human/hybrid form. It isn't a huge leap to think that the dog is Kevin given this is a yandere game, but it is a bit weird because the dog is always completely black when shown and Kevin even in his half dog form always seems to have a more orange color scheme, so it didn't register with me when he was bringing Mate's stuff onto the motorcycle that it was the same person since they look pretty different. I wish there was a way to make it more obvious that it's the same character because every time I see them, it can't register that it's the same character.

Anyways, despite it's flaws, I do think that it's very well made as a demo and I really appreciate all the customization and the UI changes that it does because it's obvious that the creator put a lot of time into it. If you do have time, give it a try!

[starhvney]

may I request a platonic Nana/KC with fem reader at a sleepover? :) binging anime and doing eachothers make up and she's low-key emotional because it's been awhile since a friend has had an interest in her directly and especially her interests,, I always felt bad she was usually pushed aside for being weird :(

𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘, 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘?

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: mystreet nana ashida & fem!reader

𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: ‘part of me will know deep down that i am pretty cool. part of me that knows i never cared for being cool.’

𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐒: fluff, platonic, a bit of reverse hurt/comfort, nana being a sweetie cutie patootie

𝐂𝐖: none?

𝐀/𝐍: kinda short but i really love and in some ways relate to nana, so this was really lovely to write :’) i also got sad when other characters just saw her as weird. also, when writing this i was like, oh yeah! binging anime and baking!! and after i finished writing the fic i read that you wrote makeup ;( i hope you still like it!

𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

the sweet smell of fresh baked goods permeated through the kitchen as the warmth of the oven surrounded you like a warm and familiar hug. you and nana stand side by side, frozen in place as the two of you zone out at the tv you had moved to the counter. its screen plays an episode of a shoujo anime, one that nana had persuaded you to watch with her. 

you flinch when you realize you stuck your hand too far into the mixing bowl, your fingers slowly sinking into the freshly made dough instead of rolling it into balls like you were supposed to. 

a squeal leaves nana’s lips as she jumps up and down in excitement, hugging onto your arm with a grin. you glance back at the screen to see that the love interest had finally kissed the main character.

“it only took, what, twelve episodes?” you giggle, earning a huff and nudge from the pink-haired girl.

“hey, this is a special moment, okay! wasn’t it cute?”

“yes, yes. it was super cute,” you concede. “i really liked that one! you have good taste.” 

“i’m glad,” she turns her attention back down to the heart-shaped cake she was frosting. “...my interests can be a little weird, but i’m glad you like them.”

you turn to her curiously, noticing her strange change of tone and how the baked good in front of her suddenly was much more interesting than anything else in the room.

“i don’t think they’re weird.” you insist, attention drawn to how her tail anxiously flicked back and forth.

“i just mean most people think i’m kind of strange,” she says, waving her hand dismissively as if it were no big deal. “my hobbies aren’t really… normal.”

you wrinkle your nose, eyebrows furrowing.

“what’s “normal”, anyway?” nana’s round eyes flick back to you, her expression taken aback. “sounds boring.”

she lets out a quiet laugh suddenly, covering her mouth before looking down at the cake with a distant smile on her face.

“yeah, i guess i never really wanted to fit in anyways.”

the two of you continue to bake in comfortable silence, letting the soft hum of the tv fill your ears as you both focus on your tasks. the setting sun shines through the windows, casting an orange glow on both of your faces. when the episode ends, nana softly sets down her butter knife, turning to look at you. as your eyes meet hers, you’re shocked at the emotion you find in them, molten gold glistening as tears gather on the surface.

“i’m so glad you’re my friend,” lean hands reach out for yours, cupping them in an earnest show of appreciation. “i hope you know how much you mean to me.”

you squeeze her hands back, eyes widening as you try to think of a response to her sudden affection.

“i feel like i can really be myself around you. people have always brushed off my interests and called them silly, but you genuinely care. thank you.”

“of course, nana,” you pull her into a hug. “you’re one of the kindest and most interesting friends i’ve ever had.”

she sniffles and clears her throat, pulling from the hug to wipe away a stray tear that had fallen from her lashes.

“really?” her voice is small, tight with surprised uncertainty.

you tilt your head, giving her a soft smile.

“yeah… i actually was gonna say we should do this more often. you know, have sleepovers like this where we try out a new hobby we’re interested in.”

“really, really?!” her eyes light up in elation, her sentiment quickly shifting into pure excitement once again. “you’d want to try crochet? and dollmaking? are you sure?”

“uh, duh! that sounds like so much fun.”

she squeals in happiness, engulfing you in another hug and spinning you both around in the kitchen. the smell of her vanilla and strawberry-scented perfume filled your nose, a scent that she had donned and owned since high school.

"we should make a list!"

after spinning and giggling a bit longer, you two soon returned to your previous activities, debating if the second male lead was a better choice or not while munching on your freshly baked sweet treats.

©starhvney, 2024. please do not steal or repost my works as your own.

[love-takes-work]

Teabag Cookies

Amethyst routinely eats used teabags. This is not good for humans, but if you wanna be like her, how about making your own edible teabags (well, as chocolate-dipped shortbread cookies)? Read on. . . .

See more SU food tutorials!

Ingredients:

1 teaspoon tea, any flavor you like

2 cups all-purpose flour

1 cup unsalted butter, softened

½ cup fine granulated sugar

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

¼ teaspoon salt

6 ounces semi-sweet chocolate pieces (to be melted)

Directions:

Use a stand mixer or hand mixer to whip the butter on medium speed until it is fluffy; it will take about 3 minutes. You can use a spatula to scrape down the sides of the bowl.

In a little dish, stir together the tea and sugar. (Variation idea: If you want to make different flavors with different tea, you can half the ingredients and make separate batches.)

Whip the sugar mixture into the butter mixture, and once it's fully incorporated, add the vanilla extract.

Then add in the flour and salt. You will want to turn off the mixer, fold it in with the spatula a bit, and then use a low speed to complete mixing it in. Don't overmix; you want this to be evenly mixed together but no more.

Flatten the dough into a disc. Wrap it up in plastic wrap or a reusable refrigerator wrap, and chill it in the fridge for 1 hour or more.

Once the chilling is complete, prepare a clean floured surface and roll the dough out with a rolling pin to about half a centimeter/a quarter of an inch. Try to get it into a nice rectangle shape.

Using a nice sharp knife that makes clean cuts (or a pizza cutter), cut into nice little rectangles.

Use a spatula to lift the rectangles onto baking sheets lined with baking parchment. Space them with about a centimeter between them.

Then use the knife to chop two ends off each rectangle so they will be shaped like teabags.

Use a straw to punch a nice hole in each--not too close to the top. Make sure each hole goes all the way through.

Chill the cookies in the refrigerator for 15 to 20 minutes. This will help them retain their shape and not let the hole close up too quickly; they will start to harden as they cook in the oven before the butter in them melts if they start cold.

While waiting for the cookies to chill, you can preheat the oven to 340º F / 170º C. When ready to bake, use the middle rack only (do two baking batches). Bake the cookies for 13 to 15 minutes and do not let them get brown--they should remain tan.

Cool on wire racks. Once the cookies are totally cooled, you can dip them. Use a double boiler to melt your chocolate pieces, stirring with a spatula to help combine lumps.

Dip the cookies halfway in to coat them with chocolate, and then put them back on their parchment to settle. You should chill the cookies again to help the chocolate solidify.

Now, for the strings (which really make the effect!), if you are already a tea-drinker you can save up tea strings and tags from other teabags you've used. This is especially cool if you are varying the flavors of the tea in the cookies and you can include matching tags. . . .

But if you don't drink tea, don't want to wait to collect tea strings, or just want to make your own, you can use dental floss for the strings and folded-over address labels as tags.

If you are serving these at a little tea party or at a gathering, you can always decorate these tags with names, symbols, stickers, or messages!

When you're ready to put it all together, just loop each string through the cookie holes and tie them.

It's pretty much required that you serve them on adorable dishware with dainty cups, right? They are perfect for dunking in tea!

Or you could just unceremoniously chomp them down, like a certain Gem we know!

See more SU food tutorials!

[schnitzelsemmerl]

A RtC fic, but Ocean votes for herself. Or she doesn't.

Karnak's loud voice boomed through all purgatory, "Ocean O'Connell Rosenberg. Your vote?"

Ocean stepped forward, nervous. The tension in the room was so thick it coud've been cut with a knife. The room waited in anticipation. There was the light. She could walk through. Into the living realm. Everything would be forgotten...or atleast she hoped so. Mischa glared, as did Noel, who whispered "Don't you mess this up", his voice laced with venom. Constance looked down at the floor, her hands resting in her lap. Ocean could see a single, small tear roll down her flushed cheeks. Ricky was next to Constance's right, patting her on the back in supportive manner. And Jane- no, that... freaky monster, was staring at Ocean with her black doll eyes, clutching her headless doll. No emotion behind her- no, its eyes.

Stay strong, Ocean. You can't feel empathy for them now. This is your chance. Your new shot at life. You could accomplish everything you dreamed of. Like becoming the prime minister of Canada. Setting an example. Bettering the world. Be known.

"Your vote, Miss Rosenberg?"

But what if you didn't choose yourself? What would happen then? Who would get your vote? Now that Ocean thought about it... she had never really thought about that. Every story had a lesson.. why didn't she ever listen to the others' stories?

Constance, who was obviously known as the nicest girl in town. But she was so much more. Constance loved to bake. She loved flowers, too. Especially tulips. She dyed her hair a different color every month. Ocean hated that. But what she'd give to be alive one more time. To see Constance alive too. One last time.

Noel, who was pretty much her frenemy. Yet despite all that, she... liked him. Not in a romantic sense. Not even in a platonic sense. She liked the way he saw the world. The way he sang. The way he was passionate about things that brought him joy. The way his handwriting looked like it came straight out of a love letter. Ocean hated the way she could never get away from Noel. And he hated that fact even more. But deep down... she'd do everything to be alive and bicker with him about something minor, something that didn't even matter, again.

Mischa, who was forced to join the choir. She honestly couldn't stand the way he'd start fights. The way he brushed his hair to make it stand up like that. But she grew to like it, for some weird reason. Ocean admired Mischa's passion. His hardworking nature, how he wasn't afraid to stand up for himself. He also stood up for her, he punched a girl from Ocean's AP Calc class who called her a prude. Her. Ocean O'Connell Rosenberg. He didn't have to. But he did it. For some ominous reason. She had to pick him. He had a whole fiancée to live for.

Ricky. The most creative person Ocean ever had the pleasure of meeting. He listened. He was creative, kind, a "cool dude", who was "madwickedawesome", as Mischa would say. Ocean missed how Ricky would always draw cats on the sheet music when they were supposed to be rehearsing. She missed how he would wear funky-colored sweaters every day. At one point, he owned about 20 different ones. She'd give everything to read Ricky's stories about Zolar one more time, despite being grossed out before. It was still weird to her. But strangely, she missed that.

And...her. The unidentified girl.

Ocean couldn't pick herself. No.

"Miss Rosenberg." Karnak spoke, interrupting Ocean's thoughts. "Time is running out."

Why did she ever take everything for granted?

The ominous novelty machine began to count, "10."

She didn’t deserve to come back to life.

"9."

Who should she pick?

"8."

It had to be someone else. And she needed to make that decision NOW.

"7."

They had to tell her story too.

"6."

They had to tell the choir's stories. She didn’t care if she would ever be remembered. But she couldn't let the others be forgotten.

"5."

Ocean wishes, she would've known this before.

"4."

She wishes she had known that there is no way to control who lives, who dies, and who tells one's story.

"3," Karnak's voice began to quiet down. The machine began to rattle.

Think, Ocean! Pick someone...

"2," he spoke, the gears in his mechanical body turned and malfunctioned audibly. Ocean cringed at the sound of metal screeching.

But who?

"1," the magic machine uttered. Everything turned dark. Karnak was broken, beyond repair.

Ocean softly breathed, "Her. I vote... for her." She pointed at a confused Jane.

But her decision was made a split second too late.