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#And he is most certainly going to stop once he runs out of snacks
donuts4evry1 · 9 months
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An overdone doodle from yesterday! I was hoping to do something fun with light but it ended up turning out sort of... eh...
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hysteria-things · 7 months
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need a rough chris smut that’s kinda like the one u wrote for matt. that movie one where he kept restarting it?
maybe reader has been teasing chris all day leaving him super super needy but not needy in the way where he becomes subby, he gets tired of it and when they’re alone he puts her in her place and just edges her over and over again so she knows how he feels.
and he gets so turned on by her crying and shit and the more she does and begs him to cum the more he edges her
hes just a lil meanie :33!
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RULE BREAKER
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𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: dom!chris x reader
𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: you’ve been such a tease all day, and chris is starting to get fed up. later that night he comes up with a plan… one that you’re not fond of.
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: SMUTTY SMUT, swearing, teasing, vibrator, orgasm denial, edging, dacryphilia, begging, spanking, overstimulation, choking, degradation, p in v, stomach bulge, unprotected sex (don’t be silly!)
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 1,277
𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: chris is mean in this sorry not sorry😇
sorry it took so long :(
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chris isn’t fond of the game that you’re playing. you’re acting oblivious to it, but he knows damn well what you’re doing.
you and the triplets are on a target trip right now, and the two of you are at a different section of the store.
“should i get this?” you ask innocently, bending down in front of him to pick up a product that you certainly don’t need off the bottom shelf. wiggling your ass a smidge, he stares at you unamused.
you sigh, backing up into him and arching slightly. “or what about this one?” you stand on your tippy toes to grab another useless item.
he groans because when you reached up, your ass rubbed against his crotch. he grips onto your hips and pulls you closer. “cut it out.”
“cut what out?” you pout, looking at him with those fuck me eyes you’ve been giving him all damn day.
when he doesn’t answer, you sigh and rotate your body. “let’s check out.”
before walking away, he flinches once you grab onto his hard-on.
he was quiet the whole ride back to their house. matt is dropping you off since you’re sleeping over, but they’re going to film first. “thanks matt!” you exclaim, getting out of the backseat.
“i need to run inside real quick.” chris says, grabbing the target bag and following behind you.
once he shuts the door, you turn to face him. he yanks a box out of the bag and throws the bag somewhere. your eyes widen.
it’s one of those vibrators that one controls from their phone. you don’t even know when he picked it out.
he unboxes it and takes it out, pulling you to him by the waistband. you gulp, your eyes not falling from the toy. “when—”
“shut your mouth.”
you immediately close it, letting him reach down into your underwear to put the vibe in. you bite your tongue at the feeling.
he points his finger at you. “i’m going to go film a video. you are going to stay here. don’t fucking touch it, and don’t you dare cum. if i find out you’re going to be in big trouble, you understand me?”
“yes,” you mumble, looking down at your feet.
he grabs your jaw and forces you to look at him. “what?”
“yes,” you repeat in a higher tone. he grins, kissing you on the cheek before heading out the door.
you’re so fucked.
you roam around the kitchen aimlessly, looking for a snack. it started as a gentle rhythmic feeling, like when you were on the couch watching a movie before and felt the vibration start between your thighs.
currently, nothing is happening, but chris has been edging you for about an hour now.
you tap on your phone that’s on the counter before you feel the most intense vibration yet, possibly on the max setting.
knuckles white as you grip tightly on the counter, your head falls between your shoulders with a loud moan.
you start humping the toy as if that’ll do you a favor. it doesn’t, but the vibration is so intense that your legs start to quiver.
a chance to breathe comes along when it stops, but it doesn’t take long for it to start up again.
despite your grip, you almost tumble to the ground. you squeal uncontrollably, the knot in your stomach forming like it has been all this time.
it’s too late to stop the knot from snapping, sighing in relief when your orgasm drips down your legs.
you thought you were fucked before, but now you’re really fucked.
chris fiddles with the controls on his phone, his brother’s voices blocked out around him. “can you get off the damn phone and listen?” nick asks annoyed, tapping his brother on the shoulder to gain his attention.
“hold on,” he replies, then he gets a text from you.
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your leg bounces as you sit on chris’s bed, the door swinging open just moments later. he didn’t touch the vibe once you texted him, and it freaks you out even more. you look at him with wide eyes and he joins you. “take it out.” he demands, referring to the toy that’s still inside you.
you throw it somewhere on the floor, and when you do, chris yanks you by the back of the neck to pull you over his lap.
he quite literally tears off your leggings, and before you can react, a hand makes rough contact with your right asscheek.
you jolt while his hand meets your left one this time. “funny to assume that you can tease me all day and get away with it.” right. “but you were wrong.” left.
“it was an acc—” you cry out of pain when he spanks you again.
“be quiet,” he says through gritted teeth, spanking you so many times that your ass turns red and is tingling. he doesn’t care if his brothers can hear. there’s only one thing on his mind, and that is to punish you.
tears well up in your eyes, your arousal glistening on your pussy.
when he’s done, he throws you back flat onto the bed. you gulp when he unbuckles his pants.
you feel his body dip into the bed, hovering over you. the chain he’s wearing dangles freely above your face. “ch—”
“do you just not fucking listen?” he curses, rubbing his tip teasingly at your entrance. maybe you should shut up.
he has no problem sliding into you, and the moment he does you groan. he wastes no time to plow into you, arching your back the deeper he gets.
you start to lift your head from the pleasure, but he wraps his hand around your neck to push it down. broken moans escape your lips, your eyes fluttering back with each thrust.
chris grunts, loving the way your eyes fill with tears. “i’m gonna—”
“absolutely not,” he says, lifting your legs so they rest on his shoulders. this new angle doesn’t help with the feeling in your tummy. “hold it, slut. doesn’t feel good, does it? huh?”
at the last word, he pulls out and slams back into you. your cry out, your bottom lip quivering.
your hands scratch at his chest, silently begging for release. it sucks though, because you know he won’t give you one anytime soon.
“ple-ease.” you beg. “p-please. i need to—”
you’re cut off when he starts to hit your cervix, the bulge of his cock forming in your stomach. he smirks menacingly, taking his unoccupied hand and pressing it onto the bulge.
“feel how deep i am?” he questions, but your head is leaned back with whimpers leaving your mouth. your legs start to shake, being too far gone in the pleasure.
squelching noises and the slap of his hips on your ass bounce off the walls, along with your noises. “please, please, please.” you sob, your g-spot getting hit over and over again.
“no. don’t make me say it again, slut.” he says, getting more turned on by the tears streaming down your face. “this is what you wanted, no? you wanted to be fucked like a whore, and that’s what i’m doing.”
when you start clenching repeatedly around him, the feeling makes him shoot his ropes of cum inside you. he grunts, releasing his grip from your throat.
you inhale sharply, but then he pulls out of you. he shrugs smugly when you look at him with a plea.
“but—”
“you broke one of the rules i gave you, ma.” he walks by your head to wipe the tears from your face. “don’t pull shit like that again.”
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𝐭𝐚𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭!
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fallingdownhell · 1 year
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Inazuma men when you walk in on them in an intimate position with your sister/best friend.
YES, some angsty shit again! Uhhh, I like it when it hurts xD
Characters Included: Ayato; Heizou; Kazuha; Gorou
Content: gender neutral reader; she/her pronouns for your friend/sister; cheating; hurt/no comfort; angst and drama; you walk in on them; suggestive on some parts; Gorou being manipulated; non-consent on Kazuha's part, but not explicit!!
Word count: 2,4k words
Thank you so much for giving me an angsty request. Have fun reading!
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Ayato
He would think so high and mighty of himself
Like, he was sure that he was hiding it pretty damn well and that you would never find out about his little secret
you have been engaged to Ayato for some time now, the wedding due to happen soon
it has been a marriage of convinience, both for him as well as your family, yet you were relieved when you found out you were going to marry Ayato, having had a crush on him for a little over a year now
you thought that over the time he got to know you, he also developed feelings for you, he certainly did tell you so
for a long time, you were blinded by the illusion you so desperately wanted to believe, ignorant to the sad and sympathatic looks Ayato's staff would give you
You excused his long and late hours away from you, telling yourself that he was just catching up on work and that he was alright
You only started to get somewhat suspicious when you noticed one of your friends visiting the Kamisato estate rather frequently, but only ever staying for a short period of time, while she never even talked to you when here
still, you gave them both the benefit of the doubt, thinking that they might just be working on something together
Thoma, however, knew what was going on behind your back. He wanted to tell you on so many different occaisions, yet he had to think of his own job as well and how his actions could put himself at risk, as well. So, he never said a single word to you, keeping you oblivious
until one day, it was late at night again and Ayato told you he would be working late again
you nodded and let him get back to his work, but later decided to surprise him with some snacks and refreshments you wanted to bring him
you were feeling kind of giddy when you approached his office door with the tray in your hands, as you noticed weird sounds coming from behind the doors
you didn't want to believe your ears, this couldn't be happening.. not your Ayato..
so you pushed open the door slightly, enough for you to peek into the room, only to have your world crushed in front of your eyes, along with all your hopes and dreams for the future
your ears did not decieve you, Ayato was, in fact, cheating on you this very moment with the person you thought to be one of your best friends
what's even worse was that he noticed you, standing by the door, having caught them in the act
and all he did, was smirk at you as he leaned down and bit into the other womans neck to which she let out a loud moan
shocked, the tray slipped out of your hands as you turned on your heels and started running down the halls, tears streaming down your face
you passed Thoma on the way to your room who shot you another sympathetic look.
He knew it... he was in on it..
now it finally dawned on you, and it all made sense.. why everyone was always looking at you like this.. they were all in on it.. you were the only one who wasn't aware..
still crying, you grabbed a bag and took some of your most important belongings as well as some clothes, before you left this estate you once hoped you could call your home
seems like some things just weren't meant to work out in life...
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Heizou
he wouldn't want to do it, but he would if he could get some kind of benefit from it
Heizou has always been a very flirty personality, even while in a relationship with you. It caused arguments on more than one occaision
he would always tell you that he would stop doing it.. that promise would sometimes last for a week, often times shorter than that, before he got right back to his usual behaviour
the worst part was, that he saw nothing wrong with this type of behaviour
as long as it got him the results he desired, he didn't care for the method he had to use
it was cruel in a way, but he didn't want to acknowledge that he could do wrong as well
when this particular incident occured was when he finally realized how wrong his attitude had been
he had been stumped on a particular case for a few days now, no new leads showing up and the trail was starting to get cold
it frustrated him beyond anything else and to top it off, he was currently engaged in yet another heated argument with you
you were ticked off by the way he was shamelessly flirting with a shopkeeper, right in front of you while on a date
he tried to explain that he just tried to get some clues out of her, but you didn't seem to want to hear it
after some more yelling, you left the house to catch some fresh air and cool off, while Heizou stayed back
he sat in front of his files again, trying to make sense of all the clues when someone knocked on the front door
he recognised your sister there and while he planned on sending her away at first, she made him an offer he just couldn't turn down so easily
spending one night with her in exchange for the missing clues he needed to solve this case
he didn't think long before agreeing to this deal
she entered the house and it didn't take long before things got heated and they both landed on the bed he normally shared with you
it didn't really feel right to do this, but he was doing it for the greater good. He's sure you would understand that
while they were in the middle of things, with her being on top, riding him, he suddenly heard the front door open and a sharp inhale being taken
he whipped his head around, seeing you standing there, looking shocked and hurt
immediately after that, you turned and ran out the door again, he saw tears beginning to form in your eyes. He wanted to get up and run after you, but.... he couldn't. He had to keep up his part of the deal. He could always talk to you the next day
when he sought you out the next day, you were refusing to speak to him.. and the day after... as well as the day after that
he was getting frustrated, missing holding you in his arms. He grew irritated without you around..
the next day, he saw you in the streets of Inazuma City, so he walked up to you
However, once he reached you, he was met with a slap in the face. It stung, and he looked at you in surprise
tears welled up in your eyes again as you turned and tried to leave again, but he quickly snatched your wrist, trying to explain his reasons to you
you stayed and listened, but your expression was hard and ice cold the entire time
"I hope it was worth it in the end, because you lost me for good now"
that was the last thing you ever said to him again before you left his life for good
and finally, Heizou understood what he had been doing wrong this entire time... and he regretted his decisions like nothing else in his life...
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Kazuha
now for Kazuha... he is a very honest and loyal soul
you never would have thought that you had to worry about anything like that with him, already having bad experiences from a previous relationship
Kazuha always made time for you, made you feel loved and appreciated, always told you how much he loved and adored you, whishing you would stay with him forever
you honestly felt the same way about him, already imagining a future together with him
but... we all know how easily Kazuha can get drunk.. and just how drunk he gets from so few drinks..
you were going out with some of your friends to party a bit, and you decided to invite your boyfriend along
he didn't mind it, deciding not to drink anything so he could keep an eye on you and make sure you're safe throughout the entire night
it went well in the beginning. You were moderately drinking with your friends while he was sipping on whatever non-alcoholic beverage he ordered for himself
he always kept an eye on you, but at some point of the night, he lost sight of you
while walking around the vicinity, looking around trying to find you, he ran into one of your friends, who was obviously pretty drunk at this point
she clung onto Kazuha, staying close to him, slowing him down immensely
at some point, she offered him a drink. He refused at first, but she kept insisting, promising that it would be non-alcoholic
being the sweetheart that Kazuha is, he gave in after some time, only to realize too late that she had been lying, it was very much an alcoholic drink
but it was too late already, she forced him to down the glass and then another one right after, getting him drunk
in this state, he didn't have control over his mind or his actions, he just went along with whatever she said to him
so what if she suggested to go into an isolated corner so that they could have some "fun"
in his inebriated state, he didn't realize that the person he was doing it with, wasn't you
only when he heard a gasp and saw you standing there a few feet away from him did he regain some of his consciousness back
he saw the tears forming in your eyes and he tried to run after you, but even in your own drunken state, you were faster than him, he couldn't catch up to you
the next day, he woke up again with a severe headache but still perfect memory from the events of that night
he immediately set out to look for you, finding you rather quickly
you had dark circles under your eyes and they were red and swollen from all the crying
he apologized to you over and over, telling you what had happened. He hated himself for letting this happen to him, yet he was still more worried over you
it is up to you if you want to forgive him or not, he will accept whatever decision you make. Just know that he is so, so sorry and if you choose to give him a second chance, he will make sure that nothing like that will ever happen again..
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Gorou
oh, poor little Gorou..
he is soo easy to manipulate.. people can tell him everything they want, and he is prone to believe them until proven wrong
he loves you dearly, with all his heart, but he often doubts himself, fearing that he's not good enough for you
so, when someone else comes along, planting even the faintest bit of doubt in his mind about your relationship, he grows restless and insecure
you, having already a strained relationship with your family, especially with your younger sister, spent most of your free time with Gorou, so normally, there wouldn't be anything for him to worry about, right?
Well, the thing is.. your sister has always had a thing for Gorou, even before you two got together. She neve told you about it, but ever since you made the relationship official, she hated you for it
she wanted Gorou all to herself, yet you were standing in the way of that goal. She had to get rid of you somehow..
the first few months of the relationship went by great, you were both so in love with each other
yet, after that, your sister started to visit Gorou whenever you weren't around him. You could be at work or out doing something.. she would be there visiting him, leaving again before you returned again
at first, it was just normal visits. She would simply talk to Gorou, asking him how his day went, getting to know him better. Though she asked to keep this meet-ups a secret from you, since she claimed she wanted to reconnect with you on your terms alone
Gorou, being non the wiser, agreed to that
this went on for a while until she started to plant seeds of doubt in his mind. Spreading rumors to him how you were meeting up with some other guy, how the meet-ups became more frequent, that you were probably cheating on him, and so on
Gorou didn't want to believe her, choosing to trust you. But, being so gullible, he started to see things that weren't actually there. He imagined you coming home later than usual, thinking you were avoiding his gaze
he didn't want to admit it, but with every further visit from your sister, he believed her more and more, now doubting everything about your relationship with him. Did you ever even love him?
the final part of her plan came, when she convinced him to sleep with her to "get you back for cheating on him first"
it felt wrong to him, but he still went along with the idea. At some point, he did get into it, not noticing how you came back earlier than usual, flowers in your hand..
those flowers immediately dropped to the ground as you realized what you just walked in on..
and in that moment did he remember.. today was your anniversary.. 6 months togehter...
he immediately ripped himself off your sister, calling out your name, but you were already out the door. He quickly threw some clothes over himself to run after you, but your sister caught his wrist, begging him to stay
he paid her no mind and ran after you, yet he wasn't able to find you, no matter where or how hard he looked..
defeated, he returned to his place, curling in on himself.. tomorrow, he promised himself. Tomorrow he's gonna find you and talk to you..
however, the next day, he found out that you had left Watatsumi Island.. you went and found Kazuha, leaving Inazuma with him on the Alchor..
you were out of his reach, forever now, and it was all his fault.. he had no one else to blame but himself for his stupid actions.. he lost the best thing that ever came into his life, and he would never get you back...
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amorgansgal · 2 months
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Between a rock and a hard place
I finally finished it! Inspired by @autistichalsin's post about Halsin seemingly enjoying a little erotica involving 'Oh no, I'm stuck under the table... whatever shall I do?' I decided to write a piece inspired by that with a druid tav x Halsin relationship.
CW: Sexual content, terrible dad humour from Halsin, maybe not one for you if you're not a fan of small, cramped, dark spaces
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It had all been fun and games at first. Tav had been playing with the children, she had been a fox and they were chasing her through the surrounding meadows and forests, finally she managed to get some way ahead of them and hidden herself in a little rocky crevice. She watched them race by, doing her best to stay quiet and not laugh. The children ran down to the nearby river and out of view.
But before she had a chance to turn round and leave the crevice, she lost control of her wild shape spell and turned back to her usual self! Suddenly, the fairly sizable crevice was impossibly tight. She took a deep breath in. No need to panic, she just needed to focus and turn herself back into the fox! However much she tried though it wasn’t happening, perhaps she had exhausted her spell slots or couldn’t focus properly with a bit of the rock poking into her. Alright, well if that wasn’t working, perhaps she could wiggle out of the crevice or at least stop that bit of rock digging into her side. 
She wiggled back out of the opening, managing to get her legs through the hole until her toes were just touching the dirt underneath and- Oh! She couldn’t get the rest of her waist, shoulders and arms through the hole. She tried changing her position, attempting to move onto her side or getting one arm through, but it was no good. Gods, what if the children found her like this? They would be in hysterics! And then they’d probably have to get one of their parents to help. It would be utterly embarrassing and humiliating! 
Per her worst nightmares, Tav suddenly heard the heavy tread of someone walking up the hill! She tried to scrabble frantically again, but it was no good, she wasn’t budging. The footsteps came to a halt behind her and she waited with baited breath for laughter or someone questioning what the hell she was doing. Some great, noble hero of Baldur's Gate she was! Gods, it was going to be humilating once she got back to Reithwin. No doubt the children would find it hysterically funny!
‘Dear, oh dear,’ Halsin’s warm voice sent a rush of relief running through her. He did chuckle though. ‘How have you managed to get yourself into this tight spot?’
‘Ha ha ha!’ she muttered sarcastically. ‘I was playing with the children.’
‘I know, they returned to the town without you and didn’t know where you’d gone. They were planning on looking for you at the old hospital, but sadly they were distracted by snacks.’
Tav harrumphed, unbelievable! So much for her little rescuers! ‘Well, at least you’re here, please help me! Can do a shrinking spell or something?’
Halsin laughed quietly again and she jumped a little on feeling his warm, rough hand on her behind, his thumb gently stroking the cheek. ‘Hmm, I could, but then… it seems a shame to not make the most of this opportunity.’
‘Halsin!’ Tav squeaked, wiggling furiously. ‘You’ve got to be kidding me, I’m stuck in a rock and you’re thinking about that!’
‘Mm,’ Halsin rumbled and his hand stroked up her butt, coming to the waistline of her trousers. He suddenly tugged them down and Tav felt the cool air on her bare skin and Halsin’s fingers trailed round to her underwear. ‘There’s something quite delicious about you being caught between a rock and a hard place.’
‘Halsin!’ Tav growled, not at all amused, though she couldn’t help but let slip a little moan as his fingers stroked the fabric of her underwear and lightly teased her clit. Her wiggling was certainly not helping matters anymore. ‘What if the children come back?’
‘Like I said,’ he replied, sliding down her underwear till it was caught between her ankles and the cool air against her skin made her realise just how wet she was. A hot embarrassing flush ran over her body. She couldn’t really be enjoying this! She was stuck in a hole, defenceless with her lover teasing her about it and he was making the absolute most of this mess… Halsin’s fingers slid down her slit, rubbing circles over her clit and making her gasp. ‘The children are busy and you aren’t telling me to stop, though of course, if you wish for me to desist, I will-.’
‘No!’ she cried, then quickly bit her lip as Halsin gave a low chuckle. His fingers momentarily left her slit and she gave a pathetic little whine, then they returned slick with his spit and making her moan as he stroked her clit again, before dipping down and easily sliding into her. 
‘My heart, you’re drenched,’ Halsin murmured and the low rumble in his voice made her shiver. ‘Perhaps in future we will have to find more tight spots you can get caught in!’
Tav whined as he sunk his fingers in deeper, slowly fucking her, stretching her so she could take him. Her feet scrabbled against the dust and dirt and she tried to roll her hips more, but it was proving difficult. Her pants and moans echoed around the small cave and she was desperate for more. ‘Halsin, please, please, we don’t have time.’
‘We have all the time in the world, my heart,’ he murmured, ‘But I will give you what you want, what you desire.’
She felt his cock press against her sopping wet entrance, he slid it back and forth along the wet seam and she closed her eyes as it hit her clit and heard Halsin’s groan. Gods, she wished he could touch her, her breasts, her neck, her waist, but all he could reach were her hips, thighs and cunt. His fingers tightened on her hips, the nails digging in and then she gasped when he pushed his cock inside her. Tav heard Halsin’s delicious low moan at the sensation. He stayed still for a moment, his hands gripping her to the point she wondered if he would leave some bruises on her hips and thighs. Finally, achingly slowly, he pulled out until just the tip was left inside her needy, clenching pussy and then he thrust back inside of her so quickly he almost pushed her further into the cave.
It was almost brutal how deep and fast Halsin was fucking her, and how this position and situation left her utterly defenceless and utterly at his mercy. Perhaps that was what he liked about it, she thought to herself, but she couldn’t do much thinking as his thighs and balls slapped against her butt and his cock hit that little sensitive spot that left her squirming. One of his arms had her lifted up under her waist, as she had almost slipped a few times when he was fucking her, and the other was messily, desperately stroking her clit.
It left Tav gasping for air and moaning at the sensations flooding through her, there was no time to think or try to get a better position as Halsin rutted into her and the only thing she could do as she was overwhelmed by a glorious, heady rush of pleasure was to grip onto a crumbly piece of rock in front of her, that shattered into pieces in her hand. Evidently, the feel of her clenching around Halsin’s cock was enough, and with a deep, low growl he came inside her. He thrust a few more times, before stilling and Tav could hear him getting his breath back, before he slipped out. She shivered as he moved away and the cool air rushed back to her warm thighs. 
‘Thank you, my love,’ he said. ‘And I’m sorry I took advantage of you, but I could not pass it up, it’s been something of a fantasy of mine.’
‘As long as you get me out of this damnable hole, I think I can forgive pretty much anything!’ Tav yelled over her shoulder. Halsin chuckled, then uttered the spell and she was immediately shrinking down to almost half her size. She wiggled out the hole, glad to feel the warm sun on her skin and fresh air on her face. She tutted playfully at Halsin, but he had already picked her up easily and given her a kiss. 
‘Hm, funnily enough this has been another fantasy of mine,’ he said, once the kiss was over. 
‘I think we better save that one for another time!’ Tav said, they hardly needed to have round two and run the risk of being caught, though she couldn't help smiling when he kissed her again and the hot, heady look was already blazing in his eyes.
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atinylittlepain · 2 years
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We'll Be Expecting You - A Joel Miller Story
Joel Miller x pregnant!reader/pregnant!oc
Joel Miller masterlist
Baby Miller is on the way. Are they ready?
warnings | 18+ SMUT, angst, descriptions of pregnancy, descriptions of giving birth (non graphic lol)
a/n | it's here! this can be read as a standalone fic but it is really a continuation of Unexpected Expectings, it's pretty fun either way I think :) also, um, it's long, so go get a snack and sit down, yeah?
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“That’s it, honey. Feels good, huh?” His lips are a smear against her temple, bare chest curled over her back as he keeps her steady with firm but gentle palms smoothing up her hips. She clenches her hands against the bathroom counter, weakly pressing back into him with each thrust.
“Joel– feel s’good, fuck– don’t stop, please–” He shushes her, bringing one of his hands down below the swell of her belly, fingers finding her clit and rubbing tight circles that have her whining and throwing her head back against his shoulder. This has become how most mornings start since she had entered her third trimester, the morning sickness that had been rocking her all but gone and a new wave of hormones that had made her impossibly needy for him. And sensitive. 
“C’mon, mama. I know you can give me one more. Please– need to feel you.” The low thrum of his words is all it takes to snap the banded pleasure pulled taut at her spine as her cunt spasms around him. He’s not far behind, rutting into her one more time before his warmth is spreading through her core, his damp forehead pressing between her shoulder blades. He lays a kiss to the nape of her neck, a comfort as he pulls out and she whimpers. Turning in his hold, they meet in a sloppy kiss as she runs her fingers through his hair, brushing back his sleep-mussed waves. His palms splay over the wide arc of her belly, and he pulls away with a chuckle, looking down at his hands and shaking his head in awe.
“I think our boy’s awake, darlin.” She grins, laying her hands over the tops of his.
“You’re still gunning for a boy, huh?” His eyes dart up to hers, a crooked smile on his face. She shakes her head, but doesn’t say anything, smacking one more kiss to his lips before getting the water running for their shower.
It’s a bit of a struggle getting dressed these days. There aren’t exactly any maternity stores to go shopping at in Jackson. She’s been making do with an elastic looped through the button of her jeans and Joel’s flannels, but even those are starting to stretch at the swell of her stomach. It’s hard to believe that they’ve made it to December, that in a little under a month it’s going to be time for this baby to come, one way or another. 
She’s trying to stay calm, Joel already a nervous wreck the closer they inch to her projected due date, but the truth is, she’s just as scared as he is, if not more. There were no two ways about it, it hadn’t been an easy pregnancy. Much to her initial protest, Joel had gotten her off patrol shifts early on, but she wasn’t so upset about that when the vertigo episodes started coming on daily. There had been many a time when she just had to lay down where she stood and close her eyes until the room stopped spinning, something the town doctor had assured her wasn’t uncommon in pregnancy. 
It certainly freaked Joel out though. He wouldn’t move from her side if he was with her when it happened, keeping a warm palm rubbing up and down her back. What had scared him more was when she actually started to lose weight during the second trimester, her nausea getting so bad she was lucky to keep sips of water down. He had taken time off of patrol then, staying by her side and trying to coax any food into her system that she could tolerate. They learned then that baby Miller had a particular affection for mashed potatoes. But it seemed like she was out of the woods once she hit the seven month mark, at least until the delivery. 
“You know, I can still tell Tommy to go with someone else.” She huffs at his words, finishing up the buttons of her (his) shirt before waddling over to him. That’s the other thing, she waddles now. She’s never waddled in her entire life. She can see the entirely amused look on his face as he watches her from where he’s standing in their bedroom. When she reaches him she smacks his chest lightly before rubbing her palms up to clasp behind his neck and tug on his hair.
“I’m glad my gimpy walk is entertaining to you, Miller. But you wouldn’t be looking so smug if you had an entire human pressing down on your pelvis with each step.” He breathes a laugh, dipping down to press a kiss to her scrunched nose. 
“I know, darlin. That’s why I think I need to stay close. I just– I don’t wanna–” She leans up to cut him off with a kiss.
“You’re not gonna miss anything. We’ve got nearly a whole month before doctor Graham thinks it’ll be time. And I’m feeling the best I have in the last eight months.” He huffs, shaking his head at that as he brushes his knuckles under her jaw.
“You’re tougher than most, that’s for sure.” She snorts at his words.
“Damn right I am. Go. Do your watch with Tommy. And come back on Wednesday in one piece.” She rests a palm over the curve of her stomach. It’s obvious Joel’s fighting a smile under his furrowed expression, but he finally gives in.
“Alright, mama. I’ll be back before you know it, yeah?” He brings his much larger hand to rest over hers on her belly. She grins.
“We’ll be expecting you, Joel.”
Joel heads out soon after a quick breakfast. He and Tommy do this every season, camping out at the dam for a few days to make sure everything’s in order. Nothing was ever really wrong, a few swaths of infected, maybe a stray raider or two. It’s a routine check-up, and she isn’t worried in the slightest. It’s Monday, and he should be back Wednesday morning, nothing to worry about at all.
As she’s washing up after breakfast, Ellie comes bounding into the kitchen, holding something behind her back. She turns from the sink, resting her hand on her hip and taking in Ellie’s wide-eyed expression.
“Don’t take this the wrong way, but I swear you get rounder everyday. Seriously, that kid is gonna bust out of you all Alien style. Like ahhhhh.” Ellie makes more groaning noises, miming an explosion around her own abdomen before dissolving into laughter. She however, is less than amused.
“I take it that’s what was playing at movie night yesterday?” The girl hums, seeming to remember what she actually came in to tell her. She holds out what she had been hiding behind her back.
“Traded for this last night. Thought it’d be nice for the baby since she’s coming in the winter and everything.” She takes the bundle of fabric from Ellie, holding it out and seeing that it’s a sweet little quilt embroidered with pink and purple flowers. The other thing about being pregnant is how emotional she’s gotten, and before she even knows it, she’s starting to sniffle as she grasps the plush blanket. Ellie’s brow furrows, coming alongside her and awkwardly patting her back.
“Shit, don’t cry. It’s nice right?” She chuckles wetly, pulling Ellie into a tight hug that elicits a small “oof” from the girl before pulling away and holding her by her arms.
“It’s so nice, Ellie bean. I love it. Baby’s gonna love it too. I’ll tuck it in the crib for when they get here.” Ellie grins.
“You know, you can just say she. Everyone except for Joel thinks it’s gonna be a girl anyways.” She laughs, shaking her head at Ellie’s smug expression.
“I know. But he wants a boy so bad, the damn fool. I’ve been waiting to finish putting together the nursery because everything people have given me is pink.” Ellie laughs at that, sidling past her to get a glass of water from the kitchen.
“Might be a good time to get that done. Just rip the band-aid off before he gets back, you know?” She hums, folding the blanket back up in her hands.
“You’re probably right, kid. I’ll work on it today. The pinkening.” Ellie snorts around a swig of water before glancing at the clock hanging over the stove.
“Shit, I gotta go. My shift started five minutes ago.” She squeezes the girl’s shoulder as she brushes past.
“Be safe, alright? You better be home for dinner.” Ellie smiles, nodding over her shoulder as she’s already halfway out the door.
She’s been keeping all the baby odds and ends she’s been given in old boxes in a closet upstairs. Most of it really is pink, and she didn’t want to dash Joel’s hopes just yet. She picks up one of the boxes with a groan, shuffling down the hall to the nursery they’ve been working on. It had been Ellie’s room when they first got here. It was obviously a teen girl’s room before, bright colors and patterns on the curtains and the rug. But Ellie was more than happy to trade the room for her own little apartment in the garage that Joel had helped her build out. She could play her music as loud as she wanted to, a point that had really sold her on the idea. The twin bed remains in the room, but now pressed against the wall across from it is a crib. Joel had worked on it all summer, collecting scrap wood, sanding it down to perfection, carefully laying the pieces together, and carving swirling patterns into the rails. She had spent many a hazy afternoon sitting in his workshop with him, ogling the push and pull of his muscles under his thin t-shirts as he worked on it.
She shakes her head of her quickly simmering thoughts, starting to pull out impossibly tiny pieces of clothing to fold in the dresser. It feels odd, this quasi-nesting she’s doing. She certainly never thought she’d get to do anything like this after, well, after. In her old life, she did want kids someday, but she had only just started college when the world fell to pieces, and suddenly that desire turned into a pipe dream that she resolved herself to let go of. How things have changed.
She spends the rest of the morning organizing the baby’s room, laying the blanket Ellie had given her in the crib as a final touch. 
Pregnancies were sort of a big deal in town, and for good reason, so when folks found out that baby Miller was on the way, they started dropping off old toys and books, cloth diapers and bottles, anything that might be helpful. It was nice, if not a little stifling. She knew there was a weariness to their excitement for her, an unspoken acknowledgement of how quickly it could all go south. The further along she got, the less she liked being out around town as people seemed to get more handsy, asking more questions about how she was doing that only made her nerves worse. The only person who disliked it more than her was Joel, keeping a protective hand over her belly whenever they were out in town together, a deep scowl on his face if someone started getting too nosy. But at this late stage of pregnancy, her doctor had all but commanded her off any work detail, a free pass to stay in and away from prying eyes, though she did still like to help out at the stables most days. 
Glancing at her watch she sees it’s about time for her to head over to the stables. She sighs, standing in the doorframe to take one more look at the nursery.
“Ready when you are, baby girl.”
“You must be distracted because I’m whooping your ass harder than usual, man.” Joel huffs at Tommy’s words, throwing his cards down on the table and sitting back in his chair. Night is quickly closing in on the plains, and the brothers have set up their usual camp in the dam control room, a small lantern lighting their games of gin. Tommy smirks at his brother.
“Joel, she’s fine. She’s got Maria and Ellie looking out for her, and doctor Graham told you herself that everything’s looking good. There’s nothing to be worried about.” Joel scoffs, crossing his arms over his chest.
“Don’t remember you being so relaxed when Maria was this close to her due date.” He’s got him there, a beat of silence passing before Tommy shrugs.
“Okay, maybe that’s true. But looking back, there was no point to that, getting so freaked out. Because I knew that Maria was strong, that she’d get through it. And hell, that woman of yours is one of the strongest people I ever met.”
“It’s not just about strength, Tommy, not in this world. You know that. One little thing gone wrong, that’s all it’d take.” Tommy lays his cards down, leaning over the table to look Joel straight in the eye.
“Well, that’s why we’re not gonna let anything go wrong, huh? All of us, Joel. We’ve got her. We’re gonna finish this watch and then we’re gonna go home and she’s gonna be fine because we’ve got her.” Joel swallows thickly, not wanting to press the issue any further, though his mind is still swirling in worry. He nods at Tommy.
“Get some sleep. I’ll take first shift. We’ll sweep the south side tomorrow morning.” Tommy nods, getting up and squeezing Joel’s shoulder before laying out his sleeping bag and settling in. 
As the quiet of the night deepens, Joel finds his mind wandering. He can’t help thinking about how different the circumstances with Sarah had been. And not just for the obvious reasons. Joel had been so young, so reckless, and when Sarah’s mom came to tell him they hadn’t been as careful as they thought they had, it turned his world upside down. What had started as a hazy one-night stand turned into a shotgun wedding, an attempt to do what his father told him was the right thing. But the only thing that brought them together was Sarah, and even that hadn’t been enough. Before his baby girl could even walk, Sarah’s mom had flown the coop, divorce papers in the mail a few months after she left. Joel didn’t even care, not when he suddenly could hold his whole life in his arms. Sarah was his whole life, from the moment she was born until the moment he lost her.
But this was different. Joel still has a hard time telling her he loves her, mostly because it feels like love isn’t a big enough word for what they have, what they’ve been through together. But, he does love her, so much it terrifies him. He’s been struggling to even wrap his mind around what he feels about this baby, their baby. Part of him fears forgetting Sarah, though he knows that’s impossible. The other part of him fears just how far he already knows he’d go for this person who isn’t even here yet. 
He sighs, scrubbing a hand down his face. It’s going to be a long night.
It had been a long night. She had already been having trouble sleeping, but laying down in an empty bed made it all but impossible to get any rest. It had also been a particularly uncomfortable night. Wicked cramps had kept her restless through most of the night. She wakes up the next morning to a clenching pain in her low back. She assumes it’s just because of the weird position she had ended up sleeping in, curled on her side in a jumble of pillows, and hobbles out of bed with a groan. Glancing at her watch, she’s shocked to see how late she slept, quickly cleaning herself up and padding downstairs, wincing at how the pain doesn’t seem to be dissipating. 
She finds Maria and Ellie in the kitchen, both of them brightening when she walks in.
“Well, good morning. Was starting to get a little worried that the alien finally busted out of your guts.” Ellie laughs at her own joke, but Maria shoots the girl a look before smiling back at her.
“You feeling alright?” She huffs, rubbing her low back.
“Yeah, just a little tired I guess. But my back is killing me. It’s like someone is wringing my spine.” Maria hums, passing her a glass of water.
“Sounds about right. I remember I could barely walk that last month, my back had seized up so much. Are you hungry? I made oatmeal.” She scrunches her nose, shuffling over to the kitchen table.
“I’m really not, but thanks. Think I just need to sit down for a moment.” Ellie takes the seat beside her, concern splashed over her face.
“Are you sure you’re ok?” She tries to offer her a smile, but it comes out more as a grimace.
“I’m alright, Ellie bean. I just–” She cuts herself off with a gasp when a sharp pain slices hot through her pelvis. It’s only afterwards that she realizes she had dropped the glass she was holding, shards all over the floor. Maria is cleaning the mess up in a flash with a dishrag.
“I’m so sorry, Maria– I don’t know what that was, I–” “Oh, shit.” Her eyes dart back to Ellie who’s staring at her pants. She glances down, having to look twice when she sees the liquid darkening the insides of her pant legs. She feels a cool panic settling in her spine.
“No no no no no–”
“Ellie, go tell doctor Graham she needs to get here, immediately. You’re gonna have to ride out to the dam after and get Joel.” Ellie nods at Maria’s words, her mouth agape, as she jerkily stands, but stays still, staring at her. Maria brings a hand to her shoulder.
“Go, Ellie. I’ve got her.” Ellie finally looks away, dashing out the front door. She meanwhile feels like her head is full of static, the only salient thought she’s having coming out of her mouth like a prayer.
“It’s not time yet, it’s not time yet.” Maria kneels down in front of her, taking her hands and squeezing hard.
“It looks like it’s time, alright? A little early, but nothing we can’t handle. C’mon, we need to get you cleaned up and comfortable.” Maria goes to help her out of her chair but just then another shooting pain jolts through her that leaves her gasping for breath. Her voice is a cracked whine when she speaks again.
“I need him here, please, Maria. I can’t do this without him.” Maria nods, eyes wide.
“Listen, Ellie’s gonna get him back here as quick as she can. But we gotta worry about you right now, ok? Can I help you stand up?” She’s already helping her up, tucking under her arm to help her walk.
She can’t believe this is happening.
She can’t believe this is happening.
Ellie mounts Shimmer in a panicked haze, and when she gets out of the walls of Jackson, she rides harder than she ever has before.
She had been excited about this new addition to what she had only just started to call her family, but now, there’s only pure fear running like ice in her veins. This wasn’t supposed to happen like this, and it has become incredibly clear that she could lose her today. The biting cold wind is freezing her tears on her face, but all she can think about is the gasp the woman she had started to think of as her mom had let out, and the crumpled look of pain that dashed across her face. If she hustles, it’ll be a three-hour ride out and back home. A lot can happen in six hours.
“Can we open the windows? I feel like I’m sweating buckets.” Even though it’s the middle of winter in Wyoming, Maria nods, creaking both windows open to let the frigid air in. She won’t let it show, but she’s nervous. It’s early, and unexpected. Unexpected is never good. 
Kevin had come early, back before. They had to keep him in an incubator for two weeks. She remembers only being able to touch him through plastic gloves, how it had sent her reeling, not being able to hold him close to her right away. What she would have given to have him laid on her chest the instant he was born instead of being whisked away by nurses. She just hopes that it’s not too early for her, this woman she’s come to think of as a sister.
She had certainly been wary of her, and of Joel, when they first came, grizzled partners of obvious violence that they were. But seeing the way they took care of Ellie, and of each other, it became clear to her that their violence was never purposeless, rather an unavoidable cost to their quiet love for one another. They were family now.
“Let’s get you into some fresh clothes, alright?” She nods to Maria, biting down on her clear expression of turmoil as Maria takes her into the bathroom.
“Do you think you can stand for a bit? Would a shower help?” She gets no response, a vacant stare has settled over her face. Maria kneels down to get on her level where she’s sitting on the closed toilet seat.
“Hey. I need you to stay right here with me, alright? Ellie’s gonna get Joel back here as quick as she can. But you have to focus on this right now. I’ve got you, you’re not gonna do this alone.” She brings her focus back on Maria, tears threatening to spill over. A twinge runs through Maria’s chest at the sight of this normally tough woman on the brink of dissolving. She takes both her hands in hers.
“C’mon, let’s get you cleaned up.”
Tommy hasn’t seen his brother like this in a long time. As he patrols the perimeter of the dam, he thinks to himself that Joel probably hasn’t acted like this since before the world ended, since before he lost Sarah. While it’s clear he’s worried, it’s also clear he cares. And while he’d never admit it to him, Tommy can see that he’s excited. For the first time in a long time, Tommy thinks that Joel looks wide awake.
But, damn, had he been so close to fucking it all up. Tommy had been so upset that day, when she knocked on his door and dissolved into tears, telling him what his brother had said. She’s tough as nails, and so is Joel, but it’s clear they’re each other’s weak spot. He’s just happy Joel didn’t fuck it up any worse afterward. There was no question he knew how to do it right. It was something Tommy always admired, and aspired to, how good he was with Sarah. When he found out Maria was pregnant, his mind often wandered to those first years that Joel had Sarah, and how amazed Tommy had been at how quickly he filled his new role. A natural father. Joel had told him he was hoping for a boy, but Tommy couldn’t see his brother not raising a girl.
He keeps walking through the snow, eyes shifting, looking for anything out of place. Like usual, it’s quiet, and he reckons Joel is finding the same thing from where he’s surveying a little further south. 
It’s not quiet for long, however, his ears pricking to the sound of what he thinks are galloping hooves. He stills, cocking his gun, eyes darting around him, settling on the lone rider bounding toward him. He fixes his sight in the scope of his rifle, letting out a low curse when he can see that it’s Ellie.
This can’t be good.
“You’re about six centimeters dilated. We’re getting there, my dear.” She lets out a low groan as the next contraction washes over her.
“Jesus, fuck.” Doctor Graham checks her watch.
“Five minutes apart. And it ain’t jesus, honey. That’s all you.” Maria snorts at that, helping her get up from her bed so she can start pacing again. It’s the only thing that’s been taking her mind off the contractions. She glances at doctor Graham who has sat down in the armchair to take more notes.
“Doctor? How much longer do you think until it’s time to– it’s time–” She sets down her notepad, smiling softly at her.
“Well, I’d say anywhere from two to four hours until you’re ready to push. But then that’s gonna be a whole new rodeo. And I’ve told you a hundred times already to just call me Suze.” She nods, trying to muster a smile as she continues to pace the rug, Maria hovering alongside her. She glances at her, a hopeful lift to her brow.
“Joel will be back by then, right? He’ll be back in time?” Maria sighs, squeezing her arm.
“I just don’t know. But I hope so.” She doesn’t have time to frown at her words, not when a new contraction is making her keel over where she stands. 
“Three minutes apart that time. Certainly getting closer. Baby’s gonna be here soon.”
Joel feels like he’s drowning as they hurry to mount up and get home. When Tommy and Ellie had come bounding towards him, he didn’t believe it at first, had shouted at Ellie that it was impossible, it was too early.
“Well you’re not the one who saw her fucking water break, old man!” That had shut him up quick. As they strap their packs to their horses, it feels like tiny fissures are splitting through his heart, and each breath is threatening to send him crumbling to pieces. He can’t think about it, if he does he’ll get paralyzed by terror, but all he wants is to scream because she needs him and he isn’t there. 
He’s broken out of his haze by the stark sound of guns cocking. 
They jerk around in a flash, he and Tommy holding up their rifles, Ellie whipping out a knife. Four men come prowling out of the treeline, the mouths of their guns facing them down. Raiders no doubt. Joel is just about ready to destroy them with his bare hands if he has to, but he takes a beat, trying to gather his fracturing thoughts.  One of the men finally speaks.
“You folks better drop your weapons if you know what’s good for you.” No one moves, Joel quickly glancing at Tommy.
“I said drop your fucking weapons!” Here’s what Joel knows in that moment. He knows that Ellie still carries a gun tucked in the back of her belt, even though he keeps telling her not to. He knows Tommy’s got a side piece tucked under his jacket, as well as a hunting knife strapped to his leg. And he knows that he himself has enough unadulterated rage in his body right now to rip this man’s head clean off his shoulders. 
He glances at Tommy and Ellie again, the slightest nod, and they all drop their weapons, palms up. The men step closer, eyeing the horses.
“Where are you folks from?” It’s Tommy who responds.
“Nowhere, we’re just passing through.” The man sneers at him.
“Oh yeah? Those horses look pretty good for you to be just passing through.”  Ellie butts in.
“We–we stole them! From an old couple a few miles north.” The men keep inching up on them. Joel just needs them to get a little closer. The man who seems to be the leader sizes Joel up.
“Well, then I guess it’s no hard feelings if we take them off your hands, huh?” It’s almost imperceptible, the look he shoots at Tommy and Ellie, a silent understanding that’s arisen after enough standoffs together. Joel’s on the man before he can even get his finger on the trigger.
He can hear gunshots ringing out, catching the sight of two of the men falling in his periphery, but he’s too zeroed in on the man he’s throttling into the ground to check if it had been Tommy or Ellie who got them. He keeps his hand pinning the gasping man down by his throat, reaching back to draw his knife out.
“Real sorry about this, but the missus is expecting me.”
She thinks briefly of the time she got shot in the thigh. Back when it was her, Joel, and Tess, and their smuggling business in the Boston QZ. Tess had to pluck the bullet out of where it had lodged in the muscle of her thigh, digging a pair of tweezers into the wound. She thinks that this hurts way more than that. 
Her voice doesn’t sound like her own, doesn’t even sound human,  when she lets out a low, guttural scream, pressing her head back into the pillows, her chest heaving under her sweat-soaked tank top. Doctor Graham - Suze - is kneeling on the end of the bed between her spread legs. Maria is holding her hand tight alongside the bed.
“Nine centimeters. We’re gonna have you pushing in the next hour, my dear.” She sobs, shaking her head.
“No, we can’t– we can’t yet– please– we have to wait–” Maria shushes her, bringing a damp cloth to her forehead.
“Listen, Joel’s gonna get here when he gets here– if we try to wait it could hurt you or baby. You have to do this, Joel or no Joel.”  Maria squeezes her hand, offering her sips of water that she refuses. She lets out a humorless laugh, bracing for another contraction.
“I swear to god if he doesn’t get here in time, I’m gonna fucking kill him.”
Ellie’s never seen Joel move so fast, and the second he’s mounted, he’s gone, damn near impossible to catch up with in the whipping snow. She and Tommy do their best to stay on his tail, but he quickly becomes a speck in the distance as they all ride home.
She’s not sure how long she’s been pushing now, but it feels like an eternity. The only thing keeping her a sliver sane is Maria guiding her through each push, breathing with her.
“We’re crowning, my dear. You’re doing so great, honey. Let’s get ready for another strong push.” Her eyes dart between Suze who’s kneeling between her legs and Maria, wild panic creeping up her throat. Maria takes both her hands, holding her gaze firm and steady.
“I’m here with you. We’re gonna do it together, alright?” Suze squeezes her knee.
“I’m gonna count you down, my dear, and then I want another beautiful push just like you’ve been doing. Three– two–”
She lets out a blood-curdling scream on one.
“Open the fucking gates!” Joel glances over his shoulder, barely making out Tommy waving his red bandana in the air and hollering into the wind. He turns back, hearing the harsh groan of the wall opening. He’s coming in hot, hotter than he should. Normally people have to dismount before they pass through. But nothing about this is normal. 
He whips through the narrow opening, galloping right down the main drag of town, people scrambling in shock to get out of his way. 
When he reaches their home, he sees a whole cluster of people hanging on the railings of the porch, heads craned up towards the open windows on the second floor. He brings his horse to a hard, skittering stop, the crowd whipping around to look at him with agape expressions. He dismounts, but is stuck where he stands when a preening scream comes resounding from the windows. His heart finally shatters. He rushes up to the front door before thinking twice and shouting over his shoulder at the bystanders.
“Don’t you people have anything better to do? Get!” He barely hears their shocked gasps as he slips inside and slams the door behind him.
He’s still got his rifle strapped around him as he bounds up the stairs two at a time. He shoulders into the bedroom right as she’s letting out another ragged scream. The sight of her takes his breath away, her crumpled expression as she finishes pushing, her sweat-damp hair stuck to her face. Suze is quick to fix him with a hard look before he gets any closer.
“Oh, absolutely not, mister. You’re not getting anywhere near her until you lose the gun and clean off whoever’s blood that is.”
Her eyes crack open after her last push and she’s shocked to see him standing there.
“Joel?” He yanks his rifle off his shoulder, dropping it outside the bedroom door. She can see blood spattered across his jacket and face. 
“I’m right here, baby.” He quickly shucks off his jacket and boots, hustling over to the bathroom. She cranes her neck and can just see him harshly scrubbing at his arms and face before he hurries back into the bedroom, Maria moving out of the way to let him kneel down alongside the bed. She narrows her eyes at him as he takes her hand.
“F-f-fuck you. I’ve been trying– trying to wait for you all day. Do you know how fucking hard that’s been?” His face goes slack at her harsh words, but before he can respond a contraction hits and she has to push, curling up over her stomach and bearing down hard as Suze counts her through it. She squeezes his hand tight, slumping back in a mess of heaving breath when she’s done. He takes her face in his hands, holding her gaze steady.
“Are you seriously mad at me right now? I’ve been trying to get back to you all goddamn day! You were the one that told me to go, you mad woman!” She huffs, getting ready to reply but Suze cuts her off.
“Hey! You two! Cut the bullshit so we can get this baby out, huh? A few more strong pushes is all it’s gonna take.” Her focus immediately falls back to the pain she’s in, and she grips onto both of Joel’s wrists, whimpering his name.
“I’ve got you, mama. Tell me what you need. What can I do, baby?”  
“Want you closer, please– n-n-need you with me, closer.” He shushes her, letting go of her face and coaxing her to sit up a bit as he gracelessly crawls onto the bed to slide behind her. His legs splay out, framing her bent knees, and she rests back into his chest, her head laying back on his shoulder. For a moment, relief floods through her body as he brings a forearm to wrap over her sternum, hand squeezing her opposite shoulder as he presses kisses into her damp hair.
Suze settles back into position between her legs, Maria now standing alongside the bed with towels and scissors ready. Suze gives her a firm nod.
“Alright, my dear. I’m gonna count you down and you give me another strong push.” She brings her hands to curl over Joel’s forearm bracing, herself for another lick of pain, while he lowly murmurs in her ear.
“I’m here with you, baby. You’ve got this. I’m right here.”
“Three– two– one.” The scream she lets out sends a jagged shiver down Joel’s spine and he finds himself grinding his teeth as she bears down, her nails digging hard into his arm. He hadn’t been there for Sarah’s birth, not really, she was a c-section. This is certainly different.
She slumps back in his hold, her head lolling on his chest as she looks up at him through teary eyes.
“I can’t– I can’t do anymore, Joel– please.” He squeezes her shoulder, bringing his other hand to tangle with one of hers.
“You can, baby– I know you can– strongest person I know, huh? You’re so close, baby, just a little bit more.” She lets out a broken sob and Joel hates that he can’t do more for her, helplessly pressing a kiss to her forehead and continuing to murmur to her. Suze clears her throat.
“I think this next one is gonna do it. But you gotta make it a good one, my dear. Can you do that for me?” She huffs in his hold, shuddering around another sob before sitting up a little more against his chest.  When she looks up at him, there’s steel in her eyes and Joel realizes that those weren’t just comforting words he told her, she really is the strongest person he’s ever met. She looks back at Suze and gives her a quick nod.
“Count me down. I’m ready.”
It’s a searing pain and then the sweetest relief she’s ever felt. The room is awash with the sound of cries and it makes her head go dizzy that it’s coming from her baby. Suze snips the umbilical cord, and Maria wraps the squirming thing up in towels before giving her a bright smile.
“It’s a girl.” What she wasn’t expecting was the breathy laugh Joel lets out over her shoulder at that, his words dripping in awe.
“It’s a girl. Our girl.”
Maria carefully walks to the side of the bed and lays her on her chest. It’s the most natural feeling thing in the world as she cups her impossibly small head, a tiny palm splaying like a star over her sternum. Joel brings a tentative palm over their girl’s little back. She glances back at him, tears settling in the creases of his smile. 
“You did it, darlin. Did so good for her– you’re amazing.” She breathes out a wet laugh.
“I had help.” Joel grins, pressing a kiss to her temple.
“Just a little. But that was all you.” She snorts, looking back down on her girl whose cries have settled into low coos before glancing back at Joel.
“You helped.” That makes him laugh, gaze focusing back on their girl.
“Just a little. Christ– know I wouldn’t shut up about wanting a boy– but she’s perfect.” She smiles, settling back against his chest and watching as her eyes open for the first time, wide and wild as she seems to take in her and Joel. He lets out a low sigh.
“Hey, baby girl. M’sorry I almost missed you. Never gonna happen again, huh? Think your mama would kill me first.” She scoffs, jostling back against him as he chuckles. He rests his chin on her shoulder, fully enrapt with their girl as she starts to look around, tiny fingers flexing against her chest.
“What’s her name, darlin?” She bites her lip, craning her neck to look back at him.
“I was thinking Olivia Sarah Miller. What do you think?” She sees his features soften even more, a sweet sadness threading into his joy. He nods.
“I think that sounds perfect for our girl. I love you, darlin. Love you both so much.” His voice is warbly, but she’s still never heard him sound so sure of something. She offers him the same certainty in her own voice.
“I love you too, Joel. And our little family.”
The sound of stomping boots sounds through the house, and Ellie comes blustering into the room, cheeks red and puffing hard breaths.
“Oh thank fuck. Is it– are you– are you ok?” Maria and Suze both chuckle from where they’re cleaning up Suze’s supplies. She smiles at Ellie, lightly nodding, but it’s Joel who speaks.
“They’re both alright, kid. Your sister’s a fighter, just like her mama.” As if on cue, Olivia lets out a small cry, her tiny fist pressing into her chest. Ellie laughs in disbelief.
A little family indeed.
Joel’s back is killing him. The first few weeks have been a bit touch and go with Libby coming so early, and they’ve been sleeping in a crunched tangle on the twin bed in the nursery, hardly leaving the room, making sure she’s warm and fed at all times. So Joel’s back is killing him, but he doesn’t care at all, not when every time he leans over the crib he’s met with the sweet sight of their girl, their little amalgamation of all their best parts. 
“Well, she’s looking good, very healthy, nice strong lungs, putting on weight just like we want her to. I’d say you’ve got a tough one on your hands.” His shoulders slacken in relief at Suze’s words as she starts packing up her bag of medical tools. Libby begins to fuss in her crib and her mama is quick to pick her up, murmuring to her and bouncing her lightly before turning her attention back to the doctor. 
“So would you say we’re in the clear?” He can see the worry creased across her face as she asks the question to Suze. He brings his arm around her shoulders, squeezing lightly as he gazes down at their girl. Suze grins.
“While anything’s possible, my professional opinion is that Miss Olivia here is going to do just fine. Although right now I’d say she’s looking a little hungry, so I’ll get out of your hair.” Suze slings her bag over her shoulder, nodding to them both before letting herself out.
She’s already moving to sit in the rocking chair that had been a gift from Tommy and Maria. Joel would never admit it, but he’s been getting worked up every time he gets to see her feed their girl. A softness takes over her that’s rare in this world, all hushed murmurings as Libby’s hand splays over the swell of her breast, content gasps coming from their girl as she starts to suckle. Joel can’t help but hover whenever he gets the chance, leaning against the back of the chair and dropping a kiss to her temple every now and again, sharing little smiles between watching their girl.
“Ellie told me she thinks you’re getting soft, Miller. Said she can’t believe you’ve opted out of patrol shifts to work the stables.” Joel huffs, standing up straight to stretch his aching back.
“Just got more important things closer to home I guess. But I ain’t getting soft, no ma’am.” She hums at that, craning her neck to peer at him.
“Oh really? It wasn’t you I heard up here yesterday afternoon singing some sweet little song to Libby?” He balks at that, trying to stifle a grin as he shakes his head. He had spent some time with their girl yesterday afternoon while she caught up on sleep on the couch downstairs, and maybe he had started humming tunes to her, watching her eyes widen with the sound of his voice like magic.
“Nah, couldn’t have been me. Think you’re hearing things, darlin. All them hormones are messing with you.” She rolls her eyes at that, righting her shirt before standing with Libby in her arms. She sways slightly side to side, looking at him over the top of Libby’s head.
“I like you soft, Joel. It’s a good look on you. At least when you want to be.” There’s such adoration in her eyes as she looks at him that he can’t help the blush creeping up his neck. 
“Only for my girls. Everyone else can fuck off.” She laughs hard at that, shushing Libby when she starts to fuss at the sound. He shuffles over to her, coaxing their girl out of her arms and into his. He had thought it’d feel awkward, holding her for the first time, but it all came back to him in a flash, and now nothing felt quite as right as when he had her little body resting in his arms. She steps back, taking in the sight of him and humming.
“Don’t let Ellie see you like this, she’s gonna think you’ve gone full teddy bear.” He only grumbles a little, too focused on watching their girl’s wide eyes peering around. If being soft means he gets moments like this, he’ll take all of Ellie’s heckling, no complaints at all.
“So what’d the doctor say? Everything looking good?” “Kid, if you don’t chew first you’re gonna choke with the way you’re talking. Just slow down a little, huh?” Ellie huffs at Joel, swallowing around her bite of dinner before looking at her expectantly. She chuckles lightly at the girl’s eager expression.
“She said Libby’s doing great, told us that she’s a tough one.” Ellie grins, startling Joel when she slaps him on the back.
“Well seeing as she came from you two hardasses I’d sure hope she’s tough– I say that with love, of course.” Joel grumbles, side-eyeing her and muttering “of course.” She lays her hand over Ellie’s from across the table.
“Ellie, I never really thanked you for what you did that day, riding out like that. You don’t know how much that meant to me.” Suddenly shy, Ellie offers her a soft smile, shrugging.
“Couldn’t let the old man miss all the fun, right? I’d do it again in an instant, just so you know. Seeing as I– like– love you guys– I guess.” She glances at Joel who’s obviously trying to hold back a grin. She squeezes Ellie’s hand.
“We love you too, Ellie bean. Me, the old man, and your little sister.” Ellie’s smile brightens into a grin at that. Joel grumbles again.
“Can y’all stop calling me that? Not even that old, goddamn.” They share a laugh at his furrowed look. As they finish dinner, she can’t help but sit back and take in the sight of this strange family they’ve created. Joel and Ellie bickering about training the new horses for the spring, Libby dozing in her bassinet alongside the table. It’s something she could have never imagined, but she knows it’s perfect. It’s family.
“Suze said we really don’t need to be sleeping in there with her now. It’ll be ok, we’re like ten feet further away and a whole lot less cramped.” Joel seems unsure about what she says, glancing back at the crib where they just laid their sleepy girl down. She huffs, tugging on his shirt collar to pull him along across the hall to their bedroom. 
“Joel, it’s fine. She’s gonna be crying in a few hours and we’ll both end up back in there anyways. Why don’t we try to get some sleep not as a human pretzel beforehand, huh?” He sighs, but acquiesces to her coaxing, following her into the bathroom as they both start getting ready for bed.
It’s silly, but she can’t stop watching the muscles in his forearm jumping as he brushes his teeth, her thoughts going a bit fuzzy and warm. Sex has been the last thing on her mind these last few weeks, and Suze had told her that was normal with all the hormonal shifts. But with six weeks in the rearview mirror of absolutely nothing, she’s getting hot under the collar just looking at his goddamn arms. She clears her throat, gripping the edge of the sink as she looks at him through the mirror.
“You know, Suze told me something else during my check-up today.” Joel hums, wiping toothpaste off his mouth as he turns to look at her. 
“Yeah, she, uh, gave me the go ahead for the other kind of human pretzels.” She’s mortified at her horrible joke the moment it leaves her mouth, but Joel lets out a laugh, throwing his head back and crinkling his eyes shut. She huffs, the floor suddenly becoming very interesting as he tries to recompose himself. When he sees her crestfallen expression, he immediately dips down, trying to catch her gaze while stifling his laughter.
“Aw, honey, I’m sorry. Just– please– never use the phrase human pretzel again.” He can barely get the words out as he dissolves into another laugh.  She rolls her eyes, turning to walk away from him but he’s quick to pull her in until her back is snug against his chest, his arms wrapping around her as he dips his chin down onto her shoulder.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry– I’m done, I swear. So, uh, are you telling me you want to?” She scoffs, trying to get out of his hold but he just squeezes her tighter.
“Well, I did. But then somebody laughed at me.” He shushes her, pressing kisses into the side of her neck that trail up her jaw all the way to her temple.
“C’mon, mama. Don’t be like that, huh? Been missing you so bad.” She’s already melting in his grasp at the way he’s nuzzling the slope of her neck, letting his lips drag over her skin. She lets out a breathy sigh of his name and can feel the way his mouth curls into a grin.
“Now that’s more like it, darlin.” She turns in his hold, meeting him in a hard kiss. They both groan into each other’s mouths, practically devouring each other in a tangle of tongues and bumping teeth. Only coming up for quick gasps of air, they shuffle back into the bedroom, hands roaming and wandering. Joel’s quick to lose his shirt with a harsh tug of it over his head and she immediately dips to smear kisses along his chest, fingernails grazing down his front. He tucks his fingers under her chin to bring her back up for a kiss, licking into her mouth hotly. But she stills in his hold when his fingers start working at the buttons of her flannel.
“Wanna see you– been missing just looking at you.” His words are murmured hotly into her neck, so he doesn’t catch the crumpled look that’s settled over her face. 
She knows it’s stupid, but she’s been hiding from Joel over the last few weeks. It seems like her body looks a little different with each day, and while he had practically worshiped her pregnant body, this wasn’t that, and it certainly wasn’t what she looked like before. She steps back a bit, gripping his wrists to keep him from getting any further with her buttons. He looks at her with total confusion.
“What is it? What’s wrong?” She sighs, tucking her chin into her chest, too embarrassed to meet his questioning gaze.
“I just– it’s different– I’m different– don’t want you to be disappointed.” A heavy silence falls between them. She’s shocked when it’s broken by Joel laughing, quickly whipping her head up to see him looking at her like she’s gone mad. She huffs.
“I swear to god, Joel Miller, if you laugh at me one more time, I’m gonna–” he’s quick to cut her off, grabbing her hands and pulling her back towards him.
“Hey, hey, hey– I’m not laughing at you, I’m laughing at that ridiculous shit you said. I don’t wanna hear that kinda talk from you ever again, huh? You– you’re amazing. I could never be disappointed when I look at you, darlin. You wanna know why?” She glances at him, seeing that he’s grinning.
“Because, when I look at you, I see the woman who was batshit crazy enough to love me.” She snorts at that, but he’s not done.
“When I look at you, I see the woman who gave me life back. Who gave me family. You’re everything, darlin. When I look at you, I see everything.” Tears run down her cheeks as she laughs wetly at his words.
“Ellie’s right, you have gone soft.” He huffs around his grin, shaking his head as he dips down to wrap her up in a deep kiss, bringing his palms to cup her jaw as he all but takes her breath away. When he pulls away, it’s only slightly, their lips lightly brushing as he murmurs to her.
“Will you let me see you, darlin? Please?” She holds his gaze, nodding only slightly, but it’s enough to get a broad smile out of him as he lays one more kiss to her lips before letting his hands wander back down to the buttons of her shirt. 
She holds her breath the whole time, only exhaling when he slips the shirt down her shoulders. When she finally glances at his face, all she sees there is awe as he lets his fingers ghost up her hips, her sides, over the tops of her bare breasts.
“So fucking beautiful. Just wanna look at you, huh? Never wanna stop looking at you.” Before the hard blush creeps any further up her neck, she pulls him in for another kiss, her mind swimming in the feeling of bare skin pressed to bare skin. Joel starts to shuffle them back toward the bed until the backs of her knees hit the mattress and she’s splaying back with a soft “oof” as he hovers over her.
Joel’s mouth starts to wander, trailing down her neck, along her collarbone. She can’t help but preen when he laves his tongue over the swell of her breast, letting his teeth graze the sensitive skin there before doing the same to the other side. He keeps meandering lower and lower, leaving open-mouthed kisses and nips in his wake until he’s nudging his nose along the waistband of her pants. She huffs under his teasing ministrations and he looks up at her deep pout with a smug grin.
“Patience, darlin. Just trying to love on you a little, huh? Been a while.” She cards her fingers through his hair, letting out a long sigh.
“It has been a while– so quit fucking teasing already.” He snorts at that, murmuring into her skin how she’s “so bossy, goddamn” but he seems to comply with her plea, fingers working quickly to undo her pants and slide them off her legs along with her panties.
He kneels at the foot of the bed between her legs, eyes roaming over her completely bare figure, lips parted and eyes blown wide. She feels like she could melt he’s looking at her so hard. He brings his palms to her calves, dipping down to nose along the inside of one leg, trailing up and up and up until his breath is just grazing where she needs him most. But he’s gone in an instant, and she actually whines as he starts to mouth down the soft skin of her other thigh. He shushes her, his low murmuring rasp thrumming through her skin.
“So beautiful. My beautiful woman. I’ll give you what you need, darlin.” With that, he skims back to the apex of her thighs, and she shivers as he coaxes her legs over his shoulders, spreading her out for him as he lays between her thighs. No more teasing, he licks a broad stripe through her folds that makes her press her head back hard into the pillows. He works her over like a man starved, fingers flexing into the softness of her thighs as he licks into her, smearing her wetness up to her clit and laving over the nerves there. She lets her fingers drag through his hair, tugging lightly, his low groans sending jolts through her core. A ragged moan draws through her chest when he pulls away just slightly to spit on her cunt, quickly chasing the slick with his tongue and coaxing out more gasps from her.
“Fuck, Joel– feel so good, please– I need– I need–” she can’t even get it out, she’s so far gone, but he knows her well enough to understand what she wants, slipping two of his fingers inside her and finding a steady rhythm as he mouths at her clit. 
“Want you to come for me. Just like this. C’mon, darlin, lemme see you.” The combination of his words and his wide eyes gazing up at her send her falling right over the edge of pleasure. She comes with a harsh gasp of his name, fluttering around his fingers as he works her through it. 
He pulls away, shifting up the bed until he’s caging in her heaving body, stealing messy kisses tinged with the taste of her. She brings her trembling hands to the waistband of his jeans, fumbling with his belt until he gets the hint, sitting back to quickly shuck his pants down his legs. His cock is hot and stiff where it rests against the plush of her thigh, she can practically feel him throbbing. 
“Joel, need you so bad. Want you– wanna feel you–” he quiets her murmurs with another kiss before fisting himself and sliding the head of his cock through her folds, hissing at the contact. She whimpers when he starts to press into her and he immediately stills, worried eyes darting to hers. She cups his face in her palm, stroking his jaw reassuringly.
“It’s ok– just need it gentle, baby.” He hums, turning to press a kiss to the middle of her palm.
“I’ve got you, darlin. Wanna make you feel good.” He’s slow and careful as he rocks into her, laying kisses on her lips with each little gasp she lets out as he shifts deeper inside of her. When their hips finally meet, they both let out ragged sighs, and he presses his forehead to the top of her sternum, panting hard into her skin.
“Fuck, I missed you– I’m not gonna last long, darlin– feels too good– always so good for me.” She grazes her nails down his back, letting out a sigh of his name.
“Need you to move, Joel– please, baby– just wanna feel you–” he presses a kiss to the dip between her collar bones before pulling out, languidly rolling his hips back into hers in a way that has them both gasping. She crooks her leg up along his hip, spreading herself open for him to press deeper as he finds a steady rhythm of push and pull. They move well together, just like they always have, her hips canting up into his with each thrust as they swallow each other’s sighs and moans in a mess of kisses. Joel brings one of his hands down to the softness of her stomach, fingers circling her clit.
“Will you come for me, darlin? Fuck– please, honey– need to feel you.” It doesn’t take much more for her to dissolve around him, digging her nails into the sliding muscles of his back as he fucks her through it. She hisses when he pulls out, watching dazed as he strokes himself over her before painting his spend across her heaving stomach. Joel flops down beside her as they both catch their racing heartbeats. She turns her head to look at him, a grin crooking across her face.
“Still got it, huh, old man?” He huffs out a laugh, turning onto his side to draw her in for a kiss.
“Still got it, mama.”
After getting cleaned up, they may have only gotten an hour of sleep before their girl woke them both up with a cry, but it had certainly been worth it. 
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bahrtofane · 3 months
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Promises under the stars - Jude ending
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Part 1
Part 1 - Jude pov
Part 2
Long awaited happy ending I TOLD U I WOULD DO IT SEE. pretty plz read part 2 before this i’m begging plz plzlplzpzlzpzlzpzl
Word count - 2.2k+
Watch it - MORE DIVORCE WOWOW. Carlos is so mean in this one sorreh.
Guys this feels like the end of an era like I’m so sad to see it end this was a JOURNEY
——-
Things change. As most things do, life moves on.
Jude remains in the back of your mind. After years of working away from the laughs that taunt you in the wind.
It comes back to him.
Your husband takes a back seat and Jude once again becomes the man who’s at the forefront of your mind.
While you’re pregnant with Carlos’s baby you thumb through pictures of Jude. Funny isn’t it. So funny you want to rip your own hair out.
You don’t know if it’s your own behavior that sparks a change but there’s a shift.
After the second altercation with Jude, things change. Carlos does less talking and more observing. He asks you to share your location at all times and you have no qualms. Not at first.
But it begins to get to much.
Where are you going, who are you with. What are you doing. Come home. Do you have to go out. No don’t go. Don’t do this. Don’t do that.
You half think it’s because of the baby and he’s simply worried for the both of you. It’s his fatherly nature kicking in.
But there’s a breaking point and it comes when you come home on a Sunday night.
——
“Hey baby.” You smile, setting down your little shopping spree for the baby. Just a few essentials. Blankets and bottles.
He doesn’t return your greeting. Head down in silence while he stares at the wall.
“Where were you?”
You frown, “not this again-“
“No. You keep going off to places without letting me know first I thought we talked about this.” he hisses.
You lean against the counter. ”I stopped to get a little snack?”
He shrugs. “You could have waited till you got home.”
You scoff. ”i'm pregnant Carlos, most things can't wait. You know how it is.”
”I don’t even know who you are anymore.” He mumbles.
“What did you say?”
He stands, facing you with brows furrowed. “Ever since Jude you keep running off. Are you seeing him?”
”Are you crazy?”
”i dont know look at how you’re acting. I’ve given you everything, and you keep sneaking off.”
”Im pregnant with your child for fucks sake and you think im with another man?”
”I’m not sure if its even my child anymore. Funny how he turned up again when you started to show.”
Your skin bristles. ”I’m going to give you a chance to take it back Carlos or else.”
”or what? You’ll go back to him? Maybe I should go and knock someone else up so you can know what it feels like.” his voice raises to a yell.
That’s just the thing isn’t it. Yo already know what it feels like. You watched it happen with Jude and now he accuses you of the very thing that almost drove you mad.
Tears burn in your eyes. You don't stick around for any more, taking your keys and walking to the door.
“Don’t you dare leave. You leave and you won’t see me ever again do you hear me. “ he screams, finger pointed at you.
You look back for a moment. Gone is the Carlos you love and replaced with this beast that hurls insults and accusations. You walk out, driving away to anywhere, anywhere at all as long as its away from him.
Your second heart break comes from Jude just like the first. Only this time indirectly and crumbles a marriage you once treasured more than anything.
You can't face his family. Certainly not his mother. Not after this.
——-
You go back to your families home. Back in your home town.
It shocks them, how you turn up at their door. You drove the whole way back, just like you did leaving.
Your mother cries for you and you don't have the heart to explain your end in full.
You’re due in about 3 months. And your days and filled with sorrow. You try you best. You know it’s not good for the baby. It’s a girl you find out. Carlos always wanted a girl. You try you really do but things are near impossible on your own.
You get a call from his mother, appolgizes tumbling from her tongue. Pleading with you for forgiveness. She tells you there’s always a spot for you in her home. If you’d like you can move in. They’ll take care of you here.
You thank her between sniffles but you say you don’t know. You just need time.
You’re nearing a breaking point yourself.
——-
Time is running out for you to make sense of things.
You miss Carlos, or well you miss the Carlos you once loved. The man who bought you a home just because he could and he listened to you.
The man who was so sure of loving you.
The only thing he seems sure of is pretending you don’t exist.
Maybe if you would have just taken Jude back when he first came to you
——-
Jude hears. Or course he does.
He promised himself to stop meddling in your life. To stop keeping up with you and just leave you alone. But when news reaches him. A piece of him breaks.
It’s his fault isn’t it. You had a home. A life. A marriage, a husband and very soon a little family.
There he goes again, ruining it.
He finds your contact info and it lays in his phone, u able to bring himself to press call. What buisness does he have in your life anymore truly.
What more can he do, say, feel?
The fields have long burned, only ash and ember in their wake. And still he recognizes them in a heartbeat. He knows you will too. For he knows you.
How can he apologize in a language you’ll understand?
——
You get a call from an unknown number while you leave another appointment. Same old same old, try to relax stress isn’t good for the baby blah blah blah. If you could relax you would but it isn’t that easy isn’t it.
You pick up before looking properly and a familiar voice comes to life. Jude.
He can’t stay away it seems. He can’t leave you on your own.
“I heard what happened. I’m so sorry. If I knew i would have never-“
”its okay Jude.” You sigh. ”its not your fault. He just- changed and it scared me so bad.”
His voice hasn’t changed all that much, just a tad deeper.
You don’t blame him. You’ve forgiven him for everything. There’s a million ways Carlos could have handled things and he chose to blame you for it all. Choose the path of accusation. That is no one’s fault but his own.
“Do you need help?” Timid. Hesitant.
You pause. What else do you have to loose. The very least you need to figure something out for your baby.
You don’t have friends close enough to call up. Not even friends when you think about it. Acquaintances at best.
You consider taking up Carlos’s mother on the offer. Your baby would be well taken care of. Brought up in luxury and comfort. Nothing would ever be more than a stone's throw away.
But you run the risk of seeing him again. And you know if he were to find out it would create a whole other problem.
Your savings will cover 2 years max if you really stretch them out. And you know your parents cant keep you under their roof forever. You do need help. But you don’t know how to ask. How to accept.
He picks up on your silence. “No string attached I promise I just-“ he takes a deep breath, “- I can't do nothing. Not when you’re going through everything that you are. “
”Thank you Jude.” You sniffle. Tears forming in your eyes while you look into the sky.
——-
Jude sends movers to help you move your things into an apartment by the end of the week. All you have to do is get into your car and follow. You need to do something about the car. Its technically under your name. The one he got you as a gift.
You feel so out of lace in it. Maybe you’ll sell it. If not for the money to erase any traces of him for good.
Jude visits you the following week.
He’s grown. Oh how hes grown. A man now. He gives you the spare keys with a small smile. No red ribbon.
“Its set for a years rent and all. No need to worry. I figured you’d want to stay near your family so.”
You give him a hug, unable to stop yourself. Even if your belly makes it awkward he wraps his arms around you. He’s smiling.
“I cant thank you enough.” You’re crying again. Tears pooling in your eyes.
He helps you sit down on the couch, giving you his arm to steady yourself on. “Hey hey. It’s alright. I got you. No need to thank me.”
”why did you come?” you mumble. Hand still on his.
“I think you know the answer to that.” He picks at his pants.
”After all this time you still do?” You still love me?
“I never stoped. I told you as much.”
You nod. “Thank you again anyway.”
”Call me if you need anything. There's a chauffeur I use when I’m in the area. I'll give you his info too. Whatever you go give him a call. Or if you need any shopping done he’ll take care of it.”
”Are you sure?”
He smiles, “more than sure. Go rest now you’ve had a long week.”
———
You only hear from Carlos when he sends the divorce papers. You dont think twice. Signing them and sending them off to his lawyers.
His only request is to see his baby. You refuse at first but his lawyers are firm. So you come to an agreement one weekend at the end of every month. Starting when you recover.
You end up keeping the car.
You want nothing else from him. Just to never see him again. You can’t accept any apology after the way he disrespected you.
You mean it. More than you meant it with Jude.
——
Jude ends up coming to appointments when hes in town. You don’t know how it happens. But he goes. Holding your hand and letting you lean on him every step of the way. You never say no. In a way you need him. In many ways you do.
It’s familiar. Being with Jude. You slip back into old habits and he never corrects you. Just gives you a tight smile.
Every break he spends with you and within an instant the baby comes. Carlos is not allowed anywhere near you. You name her after your favorite flower and give her your last name.
She’s your whole world. You can barely hold back your sobs when they hand her over to you.
Jude drives you home from the hospital and skips pre season training to be with you.
He helps you with her and for a moment it's like this is the ending you always dreamed of. A glimpse of what could have been. If you only ignore that it’s Carlos’s child, you are not with Jude and you’re closer to his pity case than his lover. But you can dream.
——
“She’s crying again.” Jude mumbles, woken up from her cries.
He’s been sleeping on the couch. To make it easier for the both of you.
You groan, picking her up gently and trying to get her back to sleep. Nothing works her cries only get louder and you are on your last straw.
“Jude can you come here.”
He pads to your room, opening the door meekly as you stand with her in your arms. “Can you hold her while I make her bottle please.”
He nods, opening his arms while you gently set her in his arms. She fits in his embrace like she was made for it.
You come back with a bottle to your baby softly sleeping agaisnt his chest. Little cheeks snug agaisnt him while she breaths softly.
You mouth a silent thank you and let him out her back inside her crib. Tucking her under her blanket and giving her a little pat to the head.
You could get used to this.
——
You fall for Jude once more. As your little girl turns one you find a rhythm with him. She even calls him dad. You never correct her. There’s no need. He does all a father would and more.
Carlos drops from her life before she can even walk. You don’t care.
You make the trip to Spain yearly so she can meet her grandparents at the very least. This isn’t their fault. You hold nothing against them. His mother blames herself for her sons actions and you know nothing you say will change it.
Jude retires before he can turn 35. And you marry. Nothing outlandish. Just you and him and your baby at the court house.
You get ice cream on the way home and watch her favorite movies till she falls asleep.
“We made it back to each other in the end. “ He kisses your lips. Soft. Gentle.
You hum, pressing yourself closer against him. “Always you and me.”
The promises you made under the stars have found you after all. In your own home with your baby you love more than anything. Raising her and walking through life hand in hand. Even after everything, you don’t think anyone else would come back for you. Fight for you the way Jude has.
Your peace has come.
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moodymelanist · 1 year
Text
Let’s Talk About You And Me
happy day 2 of @nessianweek everyone! today’s contribution is spice spice and more spice so I hope you have a glass of water nearby 😏
Summary: After their friends tease them for being relentless horndogs, Nesta and Cassian make a bet about how long the other can last without any sex.
Word Count: 4.9k
Warnings: Smut full-steam ahead. Edging, dirty talk, degradation, dominant!Nesta
Read on AO3 here!
✵✵✵✵✵✵ Nesta
It was the first Friday of the month, and that could only mean one thing: game night at Gwyn and Azriel’s place.
Once a month, everyone who was available gathered at Gwyn and Azriel’s for game night. For once everyone they invited actually showed up, so the living room was a little more crowded than usual, but that was alright. Nesta liked being able to see all the people she cared about at once, and this certainly made it easier. 
As usual, Nesta and Cassian had been the last to arrive, much to the assembled group’s amusement.
“Jesus, what took you two so long?” Feyre asked once they got inside. She and Rhys were cuddled up on the armchair, Rhys’ armed curled casually around her waist. “Actually, never mind. I don’t want to know.”
“Ha ha,” Nesta replied sarcastically, slipping off her shoes so she could claim her usual spot on the sectional. Elain helpfully moved out of the way so she could have some more room, though Nesta suspected being able to snuggle further into Lucien’s body was a strong motivator. “You’re so funny.”
“Feyre darling’s a real comedian,” Rhys jumped to her defense immediately.
“Maybe she should try better material,” Cassian replied, taking off his jacket before plopping down next to Nesta. “If you’re so concerned, there was a fuckton of traffic on our way here.”
“Traffic, he says,” Mor chimed in with a laugh. She exchanged a knowing look with Emerie before adding, “That excuse only works when there’s actually traffic on the road.”
“There was a huge accident on 395,” Nesta protested. Driving in DC wasn’t for the faint of heart, especially on a Friday night. “Turn on the news right now if you don’t believe me.”
“And even if we were fucking,” Cassian added, “it’s not like we’re the only ones that have run a little late because of it.”
“Respectfully, no,” Azriel replied over the others’ laughter. “You two are the worst.”
“What?” Cassian responded, playfully affronted. “We’re not that bad!”
“As someone who’s lived with you, I have to aggressively disagree,” Azriel answered. “No offense, but you’re the worst.”
“It’s true,” Gwyn chimed in, giggling as she came back into the living room with a fresh bowl of chips. “As someone who’s also lived with you, I can confirm.”
“So much for loyalty,” Nesta responded with a playful roll of her eyes.
“The truth is more important,” Gwyn told her primly, though she made sure to walk in front of Nesta so she could get first dibs on the snacks. 
“Our friends are such assholes,” Cassian muttered.
Nesta snorted. “I’ve been telling you that for years .”
“Okay, okay, that’s enough,” Elain said with a laugh. “Let’s pick a game now that everyone’s here. Luce, pass me the cards?”
The sex-related teasing died down once they started playing, though that certainly didn’t stop the game-related teasing as the night wore on. They’d assembled enough Uno cards for everyone to play even with a group as large as them, and once they’d sorted through the usual arguing about whether a draw two could go on top of a draw four and if they had to say uno out, Emerie and Lucien ended up winning the most rounds. 
By the time Nesta and Cassian made it back home, Nesta was more than ready to get ready for bed and hunker down with the next chapter of the latest Sellyn Drake release, but it seemed Cassian had other plans.
“Does it bother you?” Cassian asked as they stood next to one another in the bathroom getting ready for bed. He was gently pulling his curls into his usual pineapple while she washed her face, and the sheer domesticity of it all made something warm bloom in her chest.
Nesta finished rinsing and reached for a washcloth to pat her face dry. “Does what bother me?” 
“That our friends think we’re such horndogs,” he told her.
“Not really,” she answered as she swiped toner across her clean skin. If she was being honest, even though she was a private person, it wasn’t the worst thing in the world that everyone knew they couldn’t keep their hands off each other. “Does it bother you?”
“Maybe a little,” he admitted. He reached for the silk scarf he used to protect his curls and leaned his head down so he could wrap it around his head, gently tucking the ends in to protect his hair. “I don’t know. Do they think we’re just fucking all the time and don’t actually talk?”
“That’s idiotic,” Nesta said, reaching for her moisturizer. “We don’t need to have sex all the time to have a solid relationship.”
“Of course not,” Cassian said back. He stood back up and swiped her micellar water with a grin. “Don’t get me wrong, I love having sex with you, but…”
“But we don’t need it,” she finished his sentence. She reached out and grabbed her toothbrush, adding some toothpaste before rinsing it and starting to brush her teeth. “Exactly.”
“I mean, I think you get a little cranky if you’re not getting it on the regular,” he added, smirking, “but you’re dating me, so that’s to be expected.”
“Excuse me?” she replied, pausing her brushing to look at him with a raised eyebrow. “ I get cranky?”
“The evidence doesn’t lie, sweetheart,” he answered cockily. “You get all huffy if it’s been too long. It’s adorable.”
“Says the man who woke me up last night to have sex with me,” she fired back, scoffing. He thought she got cranky if they didn’t have enough sex? If there was one thing men never ran out of, it was audacity. “You’re unbelievable.”
“That was an emergency,” he retorted. He reached for his own toothbrush and quickly began brushing his own teeth, waggling his eyebrows at her via the mirror. “Doesn’t change what I said.”
If her boyfriend had stopped talking approximately thirty seconds sooner, maybe they could’ve gone to bed in peace. But instead, he had to open his big mouth and add, “I’m not the problem here.”
“If you really think I’m the problem,” Nesta began haughtily, briefly pausing to spit and rinse the toothpaste out of her mouth, “then it definitely won’t be a problem if I stop giving it up altogether.”
“You can’t be serious,” Cassian replied after a second of stunned silence, reaching out to try and wrap an arm around her waist. His mouth dropped open a little bit when she deftly avoided him and started walking back to their bedroom so she could put on her pajamas. “Nes. Come on.”
“Don’t ‘Nes’ me,” she tossed over her shoulder. He followed her into their closet and she pointedly ignored the way he leaned against the doorframe to watch her change into a tank and loose shorts. “If I’m the problem, then it won’t be difficult for you. Right?”
“Of course not,” he said, challenge gleaming in his eyes. “And when you come back begging me to fuck you, I promise I won’t be mean about it.”
“That’s adorable.” She tossed her worn clothes in the hamper and walked into their bedroom, not even giving him a spare glance once he started stripping. “I can’t say I’ll do the same for you.”
“Fine,” Cassian answered. He sauntered into their bedroom only wearing boxers, and while normally she would’ve shamelessly ogled him, she wasn’t going down easy. Instead of reaching for him, she loosely braided her hair for sleep and busied herself with making sure all her devices were plugged in. “If that’s how you want to play it, sweetheart.”
“Fine,” Nesta echoed. She pulled down the comforter and got under the sheets, taking an immense amount of satisfaction from the disbelieving look on his face. “Good night, Cassian.”
Cassian turned off the light before sliding under the covers, too. “Good night, Nesta.”
The next morning, Nesta woke up to Cassian plastered across her back as usual. She could tell he was awake from the way he was gently rubbing circles into her stomach, and while on any other morning she would’ve ground back into his morning wood, this wasn’t any other morning. 
“Good morning,” Cassian murmured into her ear, pressing a gentle kiss to the side of her neck. 
“Good morning,” Nesta whispered back. Her body was already responding to his hands and his lips and his voice – Jesus, he wasn’t even trying, she needed to pull herself together – but she wasn’t going down without a fight. “Are you going to shower first?”
“Shower?” he asked, clearly confused. It was a Sunday, so they didn’t have anywhere to be, and they usually spent them lounging around and catching up on chores after a few rounds of morning sex. “What do you mean?”
“To take care of that,” she answered, pushing back into him just enough to be a tease. “Unless you want to take back what you said, of course.”
“I don’t have to take it back when I was right,” he replied with a low chuckle. His morning voice should be illegal, she thought to herself. “But whatever you say, sweetheart.”
“Then I hope your hand feels better than mine,” she fired back. She wiggled out of his grip with a little more body contact than necessary, taking her time to stand up, turn to face him, and stretch in a way she knew emphasized her chest. “I’m going to eat something.”
Nesta made sure Cassian saw her smirk before she turned and made her way to the kitchen, feeling more than confident that she was winning this war as she poured herself a bowl of cereal. Her good mood only got better as she heard her boyfriend grumble all the way to the bathroom, and she was practically whistling by the time she finished eating and took her dishes to the sink so she could wash everything. 
She was washing her bowl out when Cassian finally emerged, dressed in a low-cut green tank top and a pair of black shorts. He’d pulled his curls back into a loose bun, a few strands escaping toward the front, and damn if the sight of him almost made her want to reconsider their competition. “Are you going to the gym?”
“Yup,” Cassian answered. Even though their kitchen had more than enough room, as he passed her he put his hands on her waist and made a show of grinding his front to her back. “Excuse me.”
“The protein powder’s in the other cabinet, idiot,” she told him, thoroughly ignoring how much he’d set her ablaze with just that one touch. 
“Oops,” he said sarcastically. He pressed himself against her again as he went to the right cabinet, taking his time to really make sure she felt every inch of his muscled body against hers before he grabbed the protein powder. “My mistake.”
She just rolled her eyes as she dried her now-clean bowl, moving to put it away on the second shelf of the cabinet where they kept their plates and bowls. “You’re ridiculous.”
“Need some help with that?” he asked from behind her, crowding her between his body and the counter. He reached out and plucked the bowl from her fingers, rocking his hips up as he put it with the rest of the clean dishes, and she had to bite back a moan at how good it felt. 
At this angle, it would be so easy for her to lean her head back on his shoulder and let him have his way with her. To let him hoist one leg up, pull her loose shorts to the side, and fuck her until she couldn’t walk. To let him—
Nesta mentally shook herself before she let her fantasies go any further. It hadn’t even been twenty-four hours and she was already losing her cool like this? She needed to get a goddamn grip. 
“Thank you,” Nesta managed to get out without her voice giving her away. It was a relief when he backed away from her with a little chuckle, like he knew exactly what direction her thoughts had traveled in without her saying a word. “Have a good workout.”
“Thanks, sweetheart,” Cassian replied, still amused. He gave her a quick kiss on the temple before he finished shaking up his drink, grabbed a handful of snacks to hold him over, and moved toward the door. “Don’t break your vibrator trying to replace me!”
“Fuck you,” she called out. He laughed before shutting the door behind him, leaving her alone and thankfully distraction-free.
With Cassian out of the apartment for a bit, Nesta found it wasn’t nearly as difficult to keep her focus. She did her usual weekly cleaning, updated their grocery list, and started a load of laundry. By the time he made it back home, she’d done some yoga, showered, gotten dressed, and was in the middle of moving their laundry to the right place.
At the sound of Cassian’s keys opening the door, Nesta yelled her greeting from where she was bent over fishing clothes out of the washing machine so she could throw them into the dryer. “Hey baby!”
“Now that’s a sight for sore ears,” Cassian replied. She turned and rolled her eyes at the sight of him openly ogling her. “Don’t stop on my account, sweetheart.”
“There’s no more clothes to move,” she told him dryly. She tossed some dryer balls in with the wet clothes and started the drying cycle, already moving to fold the dry clothes from the first load that she’d tossed on their bed a few minutes prior. “How was the gym?”
“Good,” he answered, following her into the bedroom. “Sweaty. I’m gonna shower.”
“Have fun without me,” she told him with a smirk.
He winked at her before yanking his shirt over his head. “Oh, I intend to.”
Cassian’s shower didn’t even last ten minutes, so Nesta was still folding clothes when he emerged from the bathroom. She looked up from where she was folding one of his shirts and immediately did a double take when she realized he was completely naked, his usual oversized towel nowhere to be seen, and she swallowed thickly at the sight of him still glistening from his shower. 
“Aren’t you forgetting something?” Nesta asked, trying and failing to keep her eyes on something appropriate. 
“My favorite towel is in the hamper,” Cassian answered with a smirk. It only grew as he watched her follow a droplet of water trailing down his abs and toward his rapidly hardening cock. “Not my fault, sweetheart.”
Damn. She hated that he wasn’t actually wrong, but she knew there were plenty of clean towels in their linen closet. “There’s still lots of towels in there, baby.”
“And use an inferior towel?” he replied with a heavy, put-upon sigh. “You know I have sensitive skin.”
“Yep,” she responded tightly. She couldn’t tell if she wanted to strangle him or sink to her knees and let the hard length of his cock in her throat strangle her instead, but she had to stay strong. “Which is why all our towels are Turkish cotton.”
“Hmm,” he said with false thoughtfulness. She nearly ripped through the lace underwear she was folding when he leaned against the doorframe and his cock shifted with the motion, leaking arousal and practically begging her to put her mouth on it. “You’re so good to me, Nes.”
That was playing dirty, and he knew it. Her body was practically conditioned to respond to his praise, her breath coming faster as she pressed her thighs together to try and ignore her arousal. It only got stronger as he took himself in hand, the obscene sounds of him stroking his hard cock threatening to break her like nothing had before. 
“Fuck off,” Nesta eventually snapped, forcing herself to break out of her trance. She grabbed as many clothes as she could carry and practically ran into the closet to start putting them away, knowing if she didn’t leave now, Cassian would never stop bragging about how he’d won. Even through the door, she could hear the sound of his laughter. 
But she wasn’t going down that easily. 
✵✵✵✵✵✵
After Nesta got a chance to calm down — and finish putting away their laundry — the rest of their Saturday night went quietly enough. They ordered Indian for dinner and spent the night in front of their TV, catching up on Heartstopper while they munched on naan and butter chicken, and Cassian only tried to get a rise out of her once. He only pouted a little when it didn’t work, but that didn’t stop him from cuddling up to her as usual when it was time for bed. 
In the end, it wasn’t the skimpy clothes or the innuendos or the sudden increase in bending over that did it. In fact, it happened when Nesta wasn’t even putting in any extra effort – which, in hindsight, she supposed was as wholesome as the two of them could get. 
When Sunday morning rolled around, Nesta woke up before Cassian for once, and she quietly slipped out of bed to make herself some tea so she could curl up with her book for a little while. Maybe it was playing with fire to read such filthy material when she couldn’t put all that restless energy to good use, but she’d been so preoccupied with messing with her boyfriend that she was falling behind with her book club.
Once she had a steaming cup of Earl Grey ready, it was easy to get cozy and lose herself in the morning light and the sounds of her pages turning. She was so immersed in her book that she didn’t even notice that she was being watched for a solid couple of minutes, and once that awareness slowly trickled in, she looked up to see Cassian leaning against their bedroom doorframe watching her.
“Good morning,” Nesta said pleasantly, reaching for her cup of tea and taking a large sip. From the way he was looking at her, she had a good feeling about how this morning was going to go, but she had to let him come to that conclusion on his own. “What did you want to do for breakfast?”
Cassian crossed the room in a few long strides, his eyes dark and intent on her. “You.”
“Not on the menu,” she replied. She reached out with her foot and stopped him in his tracks, doing her best to keep her composure as he grabbed her ankle and started rubbing circles into her skin. “Did you need something, baby?”
“Please, Nesta,” Cassian said, his eyes a little wild. “I can’t fucking take it anymore.”
“Is that the best you can do?” Nesta said back, doing her best to seem unimpressed. She knew nothing drove him crazier than when she acted like this, so it was only a matter of time before he completely caved. “Pathetic.”
“Sweetheart, please,” he replied. He gently let go of her foot and sank to his knees in front of her, crawling the last bit of the way until his hands were resting on her thighs. “I am so, so, so, sorry.”
“And?” she prompted. She made sure to slide her bookmark into place before looking down her nose at him, setting her book on the nightstand and out of the way. “What are you sorry for?”
“For acting like you were the problem,” he answered in a rush, his words almost running together he was so eager to get them out. “When it was me who couldn’t handle it.”
She leaned forward and sank a hand into his hair, thoroughly enjoying the way his breath hitched at the movement. “So what does that make you?” 
“…Very sorry?” he guessed hesitantly. God, she loved seeing him this way, all eager to please her and just desperate enough to do whatever she wanted. “Nesta, please . I need you.”
“Wrong answer,” Nesta said, pulling on the curls she had gathered between her fingers. “It makes you a needy little slut.”
Cassian inhaled sharply and tried to nod his agreement as best he could with her hand still pulling at his hair. “Yeah. Yes. Uh huh.”
“Why don’t we try that again, hmm?” she asked, though they both knew it wasn’t really a request. “What does that make you, Cassian?”
“A needy little slut,” he repeated quickly. He was breathing so quickly it was a miracle he was still able to talk. “Your needy little slut.”
“There’s a good boy,” she told him, deeply satisfied at the way his eyes nearly rolled back into his head at the words. “Why don’t you show me how good you are?”
“Anything,” he panted. “Anything you want.”
Nesta spread her legs and fixed him with an expectant look. “Do I have to spell it out for you, or are you smarter than you look?”
Cassian didn’t waste any time, thankfully understanding exactly what she was asking for. He reached for her pajama shorts and helped her wiggle out of them — and her underwear — before diving in with a vengeance. She dug her hands into his hair as he got to work, using the flat of his tongue just the way he knew she liked it and not wasting his time with too much foreplay.
Nesta moaned and leaned back against the couch, more than happy to relax and let him do all the work. She’d been so on edge that it only took a few minutes to push her over it. She came with a loud cry, arching her back and tightening her grip on his hair to get closer to his tongue. It had only been a few days since her last orgasm, but that was seemingly enough to make this one more intense than she was used to. 
More intense than the usual intense, anyway. 
“Bedroom,” she demanded once she’d caught her breath. “Now.”
Cassian nodded and scrambled to his feet, giving her a quick look at the way his hard cock was tenting the front of his pajama pants before practically sprinting to their room. 
Nesta took her time even though her body was screaming for more. She knew the anticipation would drive him even more wild, so what was the rush? She made sure to put her mug in the sink and grab her clothes before she casually walked toward their bedroom.
“Take off your clothes and lay down on the bed,” Nesta ordered after she’d stepped into the room. “Face up.”
“Okay,” Cassian agreed. He whipped off his pajamas and underwear, throwing himself onto the bed so fast it was a miracle nothing broke under him. “I’m ready.”
“Mhmm.” She pulled off her shirt and tossed her clothes toward the hamper, eyeing his hard cock with disdain as she walked toward the bed. “I can see that.”
The meaner she was to him, the more it turned him on. He was hard enough to pound nails, and while she normally might’ve savored the feeling of it in her mouth, she wasn’t feeling particularly generous right now. Instead of lowering her mouth, she got on the bed and straddled him, his hands automatically settling on her hips to keep her steady.
“You’re not coming until I say so,” Nesta said, slowly grinding against Cassian’s hard cock just to tease him. “You understand?”
“Y-yeah,” Cassian said back. They’d played this game before, and they both knew she’d stop if and when he said the word. “I understand.”
“Good,” she replied. She didn’t give him any warning before lifting up, grabbing his cock, and sinking down onto it in one long slide. “Fuck, I missed this.”
The sound of his whimper was like music to her ears. “God, Nesta—”
“You almost got me yesterday,” she admitted as she slowly rocked back and forth on his cock. She couldn’t believe she’d gone days without him stretching her out like this. “Walking around with your dick out like — fuck, yes, that’s it — like a fucking whore.”
“Couldn’t help it,” he panted. He bucked his hips up to meet her thrust for thrust and they both groaned. “Needed you so bad.”
“Then you shouldn’t have been so goddamn stupid,” she retorted, starting to speed up now. “But maybe you just like being stupid.”
“I’m an idiot,” he agreed. He groaned after a particularly well-timed thrust and his grip got that much tighter on her hips. “A needy idiot.”
Their pace sped up even more after that, Nesta leaning all the way forward so Cassian could get his knees under her and thrust upwards in earnest. She couldn’t help but kiss him then, moaning into his mouth as he really let her have it, their headboard slamming into the wall over and over again with every thrust. 
“Jesus, you feel so good,” Cassian moaned, shifting his grip so he could grab her ass and thrust that much harder and faster. “So fucking perfect.”
“You close?” Nesta asked. At his frantic nod, she pulled all the way off his cock so she could reach down and squeeze the base of it tightly. 
He hissed loudly. “ Ah — fuck, Nesta!”
“Just making sure you keep your promise,” she told him. When he’d calmed down enough, she let go and gave him a mean smirk. “Thanks for telling me, baby.”
“You’re trying to kill me,” he groaned. 
“I told you I’d be mean about it,” she replied sweetly, “so I don’t know why you’re surprised about that now.”
“I didn’t think you actually meant it,” he responded, only a little exasperated.  
“If only I cared what you thought,” she fired back. “Fuck toys don’t get to have opinions.”
Sitting as close as they were, Nesta could feel the moment Cassian’s cock twitched at the words. “You like that, hmm?”
“Yeah,” he breathed. “Love it.”
“Maybe next time I’ll gag you,” Nesta mused aloud, shifting to sit next to him so she could take his cock in her hand. “Then you really wouldn’t get to have any opinions.”
“Oh, shit,” Cassian gasped. His gaze flicked back and forth between her face and her hand stroking his cock, like he couldn’t decide what he wanted to look at more. “Nesta, please .”
“Maybe I’ll tie you up, too,” she continued, tightening her grip on him almost to the point of pain. He moaned and thrusted up into her hand, arousal leaking steadily from the tip and showing her just how much he liked this. “Use you like my personal dildo.”
At his full-body shiver, she let go of him completely and laughed at his look of utter betrayal. “What are we, fourteen? You’re not coming in my hand.”
“Of course not,” he answered through gritted teeth. He closed his eyes and took several deep breaths, only opening them when he could handle looking at her again. “Now what?”
Nesta chose to take pity on him and ignore his mouthiness. “Come here.”
Cassian sat up and let her tug him on top of her, settling between her legs where he belonged. Nesta reached down and guided his cock between her legs, both of them moaning when he thrusted inside her, and it didn’t take long before they were going at it like rabbits. It was all she could do to dig her nails into his back, wrap her legs around his waist, and hold on for dear life.
God. How had she survived going without this for so long? 
“Nesta, I’m so close,” Cassian panted into her ear. He pressed a series of open-mouthed kisses to her jaw and her neck that made her run even hotter than she already was. “Please, please— ”
“You can come whenever you need to,” Nesta finally told him. She figured she’d dangled his orgasm in front of him for long enough. “You earned it.” 
The words had barely left her mouth before Cassian was coming. He slammed into her one last time and stayed deep, his entire body trembling from the force of his orgasm as he moaned her name and rode it out. 
“Fuck, that was good,” he murmured into her hair. “You’re so good to me.” 
After they’d both caught their breath, Nesta found herself lying half on top of Cassian while he gently ran his fingers across her freckled shoulders. Their sheets were a mess and they both needed to shower, but she wasn’t going to move for anything. Now that she wasn’t practically vibrating out of her skin with how badly she wanted him, being in his arms was far more comforting than it had been compared to the last few days.
“So maybe we do need it,” Cassian eventually said.
Nesta just dug her face more aggressively into his chest, intent on enjoying her sleepy afterglow for as long as possible. “If you don’t shut the fuck up, next time it’ll be two weeks.”
“Shutting up now,” he replied, pulling a huff of laughter from her. He’d admitted how wrong he was many, many times already, so she didn’t even bother correcting him; they both knew how right she’d been. “I was an idiot. Let’s never do this again.”
“Best idea you’ve had all day,” she mumbled.
He laughed softly. “I love you, sweetheart.”
“Love you too,” she answered automatically. “But I really do need you to stop talking. That was exhausting and I need to nap.” 
“Okay,” he agreed, leaning down to press a kiss into her hair. “But after we nap, how do you feel about round two?”
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peaches2217 · 1 year
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Fuck it! Expectant Parents Mareach post. Putting this one under a Read More to hide my shame. Y'all were warned.
(But actually thank y'all, I wanted to get this out of my system so bad 😭)
✨ The first person Peach tells isn't Mario, but Toadsworth. She wants to surprise Mario with the news and is willing to wait until later in the evening, but she wants her surrogate father to know right away. Mario spends the rest of the day wondering why Toadsworth can't look at him without suddenly having to excuse himself, only to burst into ugly-crying one room over, but he decides it's probably not good.
✨ And of course he's incorrect! The news doesn't come out of nowhere; they've discussed it in the past, and recently they've decided they're ready. Now, when I say recently, I mean recently. The biggest surprise is that she's already pregnant.
✨ "Can't blame a girl for being eager!" Daisy jokes. "Making the baby's the fun part, after all." Before Peach can smack her hand in retribution, Peasley adds in, all too casually, "If the red one is anything like his brother, then I certainly understand that enthusiasm." Peach threatens to revoke their titles of Uncle and Honorary Aunt if they don't stop talking immediately.
✨ You know the ending of the All Stars version of Lost Levels, where Peach covers every surface inch of Mario's face with kisses? Peach ends up on the receiving end of that, a lot. That's his wife! She's carrying their child! She's beautiful and strong and perfect! And if he doesn't kiss her a thousand times right this instant he is going to spontaneously combust! Peach laughs through the entire process because his mustache tickles, and that makes it even better.
✨ Also, her feet like never touch the ground the whole pregnancy. The second she mentions her feet being sore or touches her back with a small wince or even just makes a face that looks anything other than content, Mario scoops her up and carries her wherever it is she's needing to go. She stops trying to protest a month in.
✨ To that end, keeping her comfortable throughout the process is a role Mario not only falls into flawlessly, but absolutely adores. He runs hot bubble baths for her every other night because royal work is taxing when you're simultaneously growing an entire human, he rubs her feet while she eats tiramisu in bed because it's 2AM and she woke up crying she wanted that particular snack so badly, he uses his Firebrand to soothe all of her aches and pains on command, and it's some of the most fulfilling work he feels he's ever done.
✨ They decide eventually that they want their child to know Italian fluently (Peach is still trying to learn it, and what better way than having both a husband and a child to hold her accountable?). So nearly every night, once Peach is comfy in bed, Mario will lay his head on her stomach and have one-sided conversations or sing a few songs; since she doesn't get to hear him speak in his native tongue at length too often unless she requests it, Peach is enraptured the whole time. She even has him teach her a few of the simpler songs so their baby will recognize the language in her voice as well. Any time Mario catches her singing one of those songs to herself, hand on her belly and gentle smile on her face, he melts into a puddle on the spot. Cue the face kisses.
✨ Mario decides pretty quickly that they're having a girl. He starts addressing her stomach as (la nostra) principessina, his contributions to name ideas are all feminine or neutral, and Luigi and Peasley jump on board too, discussing all the ways they're going to spoil their niece rotten, because a princess deserves no less! "What in the world are you going to do if it's not a girl?" Peach asks Mario one night. "I'll love them all the same!" is Mario's response. "...but I'm pretty sure she's a girl."
✨ When Peach goes into labor, the head nurse argues against Mario's presence at first, because she insists an untrained man taking up space in the room will merely be a hindrance (whether or not that man happens to be King Consort). Mario bluntly tells her she'll have to drag him out herself if she wants him gone. The nurse is a Toad and Mario is over 200lbs, so she relents.
✨ The labor ends up being long and difficult and Mario doesn't leave Peach's side for even a moment of it. It's emotionally draining, seeing her in so much pain for so long and not being able to do much about it, all while staying calm and being as much help as possible, but his perseverance is a big part of what sees her through. All that collectedness goes out the window the second he's holding their new baby in his arms. Peach just gives him a tired giggle and pats his back while he bawls his eyes out.
✨ Mario was right! They have a little girl with her papa's hair and face shape and her mama's eyes and nose. And when he sees his new granddaughter for the first time, Toadsworth may or may not vow to commit war crimes for her should the need ever arise. Peach chooses to believe she's just hearing things in her exhaustion.
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calimelontea · 1 year
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in a day's amusement!
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❥Spending a day with them at an amusement park!
Category- Fluff ☀
Content- Malleus, Trey, Floyd and Kalim, GN!reader, like slight mentions of death if you squint?? But it's jokingly within the context given :)
Floyd Leech
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➼If you are afraid of heights, he is the WORST choice fr, you thought you had free will? Think again, y'all are going on all the highest, fastest and most extreme rides on the park and he is NOT taking no for an answer.
➼I salute you soldier, your sacrifice will not be in vain /j
➼Real talk tho, he's gonna go on just about everything that looks dangerous or fun (which his version of fun is also dangerous in it's own rights) and ofc he's gonna take his favorite shrimpy with him! Why wouldn't he want to torment you bring you along?? (he does this out of love) <3
➼So just be prepared for a lot of running and being dragged by the arm from place to place until he eventually gets bored from riding everything. Which will likely take awhile, so I def suggest running shoes for this trip.
➼Ofc he'll go on anything you suggest, although begrudgingly if it doesn't involve dizzying speeds or death-defying drops. As long as it keeps the two of you busy or entertained, he isn't really opposed to it.
➼Sadly you'd end up being the one that needs to prepare for this trip cuz he's just gonna run in with whatever's in his pockets and that's all :') but he'll be thankful for it later when you bust out the water bottles and sunscreen from your handy bag once the heat picks up.
➼But hey, what's a trip without some spontaneous decision making?? Which will certainly be happening at the gift shops once your trip is all done. Bro is gonna grab so much overpriced junk you could easily buy cheap at a local convenience store all for the heck of it.
➼If you're a rollercoaster junkie or just vibe with literally anything and everything, you're likely to have a blast with him, but if you're deathly terrified of heights or fast paced rides, sorry luv, you're gonna be fighting for your life to be getting out of that line </3
Kalim Al-Asim
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➼Look at this lil guy, this beam of sunshine, this absolute lad. He's just so happy to be going somewhere and spending time with you!
➼Will absolutely go anywhere you wanna go 100%! The spinning teacups ride? Absolutely! The ferris wheel? Sure thing! The ultimate mega coaster of death and destruction? I see no reason why not! :D
➼He wants to ensure that you're having just as much of a good time as he is, and that you're completely comfortable throughout the whole trip!
➼The concessions are definitely a must while you two are there. Y'all end up trying almost everything the park has to offer, mostly due to the fact that you two will literally exchange snacks for one other to try if you two don't get the same thing.
➼Likely only prepared for the trip with Jamil's help tbh, otherwise poor guy would probably be going in completely barren as well </3
➼Despite that though, he's more than happy to cover for expenses, which means plenty of stops to gift shops and prize games! (Definitely tries to win you a prize from the games, but ultimately asks for help from Jamil cuz he can't quite get it :') he's trying his best)
➼Speaking of Jamil, bro is literally gonna be ran ragged cuz of you two, r.i.p bro </3 gonna have a heart attack the second you recommend anything that looks remotely deadly, y'all gonna have to sneak past him in order to get in line...
➼Definitely one of the best options for a good time! He's always ready for a fun time and isn't shy to try out scary rides with you!
Malleus Draconia
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➼Bro is taking in the sights fr, all whilst you're out here trying to figure out what you two should do for the day.
➼Ofc it makes him extremely happy you chose him to come with you on this trip! And because of this he ensures he has all the essential supplies to make sure this trip goes off without a hitch!
➼Similarly to Kalim, he's no chicken when it comes to the intimidating rides. He'll happily accompany you in whichever excursion you believe will be the most fun. Only difference is he's just gonna be one of those mf's that just sits there in silence tho while everyone else is screaming for their lives, bless his heart... /lh
➼Also similarly to Kalim, he's got no problem covering for expenses, although he'll mainly do so just for you. May buy himself a singular lil keychain as a memoir for this occasion (and will likely get one of those fancy glass display case boxes for it once he gets back 😭)
➼Thanks to Lilia's tutelage, he is able to operate his phone's camera!! Which means he will probably take all sorts of pictures along the trip. Whether he sees an aesthetically pleasing landmark, or accidentally fumbles his phone and takes like 5 pictures of his thumb covering the lens, he will have many memories of the trip documented in his device.
➼May even sneak a couple of cute photos of you as well <3
➼Pls sit in a nice scenic spot with him and eat icecream together whilst talking about literally any obscure subject you want to talk about. Bro will be the happiest fae in Twisted Wonderland + he just deserves it :')
➼Very good man, 10/10 if you want a nice, chill, wholesome trip full of new memories and maybe a couple thrills if you're up to the challenge.
Trey Clover
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➼First of all, this man is showing up legit OVER prepared for this trip.
➼Oh, you need this strange, obscure item for some completely isolated event that it would be needed? Good thing he packed it just in case 👍 Bag checkouts at the security gate would take ages...
➼Once you're in tho, it's a pretty fun time! He's more than happy to take you on some of the more mild rides, but for anything too intense, he's likely to end up being the designated bag holder. Bro has his boundaries.
➼An absolute no brainer though is definitely the sweets! Sugary goodies from amusement parks are typically quite unique depending on where you get it and what time of the year it is, so it's always good to give it a try while you can!
➼If you take a bite of a dessert you brought from the park and tell him you think he makes it better, I guarantee he would melt hbdkhadkajs
➼Is the designated mapholder and helps you plan out the day. Will even make sure you guys have enough time to see any shows the park may perform within the day!
➼And ofc you guys won't leave the park empty handed! He'll probably get something cute for the two of you from the souvenir shop like matching bracelets or some stuffed animals.
➼Overall a great choice for the perfect experience! He may not be a daredevil, but he will always make sure you're having fun and staying safe <3
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fatuismooches · 1 year
Note
HIHI!!! it’s 1am but i come to you with that fluff thought i promised ya :DD (..and an angst one, it’s okay!! dottore will wipe all of our tears </3 ). i’m sorry if i’m like!! brainrotting too much!! you’re so fun to hear the opinions of, and i love talking about this
dottore with fragile reader would be so soft, i like to imagine he really does put in the effort for those picnic dates that you always talk about. Does it mean carrying you there and making a spot where it’s much warmer rather than the cold unforgiving winter in snezhnaya? having a segment travel all the way to liyue for a snack? yes. it also means kissing your forehead as he extracts blood from you, clutching your hand when he knows you’re nervous, holding you no matter how busy he is. He can have you on his lap while he works, no matter how sick you are- it’s worth it to hear his true assistants thoughts. You’ve always been the most important. (dottore probably does not like the replacement assistants and purposefully makes their jobs harder…or the segments pester them because they love you just as much).
…on the other hand
on that traveler finding fragile reader note…omegatorre deleting all/most of the other segments probably meant it was much much easier for traveler to even get to that area in the first place. normally, the lab and area would be swarmed with dottores, but because of omegatorre- now zandik will have alot less. He can’t put as much energy into creating segments because he’s focused on the cure, but *now* traveler is with who he loves most, and he has to stop them. you’re right!! la signora, childe, etc had someone that drove them to become their worst to protect their memory, futures, etc- you are everything to dottore. you’re everything to zandik. ofcourse traveler has to win somehow, escape somehow, its their story after all- so now all zandik could do, is grab you, run, and fix this.
- 💌
(x) 💌 ANON OMFG I LOVE U… ANGST + FLUFF THE TWO THINGS THAT WILL KILL ME SOME DAY 😭💕💕 dottore + fragile reader lives in our head rent free huh
oH MY GOSH THOUGH THE PICNICS- You’re so right. Fragile! Reader tends to get super nostalgic about their Akademiya days/when they weren’t sick. So a lot of times they daydream about how they use to catnap and tease Zandik under the sun while he just muttered about how “this is a waste of time” (even though he secretly enjoyed it.) And now you just think about how these things are probably never gonna happen again for a long time :( but Dottore and the clones are like. We’re going to make it happen anyway. Since it’s quite difficult for you to leave the lab, makes me think about how once I said he built a specific room for you to emulate the outside world’s scenery. He literally got the same spot you two used to go to replicated for you 🥺 And hehe you’re so right about the clones. Mfs would do anything for you even if it means going halfway across Teyvat for Fried Radish Balls. (They make it back in record speed too😭 and present to you your snack as if it’s worth more than gold)
I just love the idea of Dottore being a genuine doctor with fragile! reader 😭 like it’s funny and cute to think about him doing legitimate doctor things and not the illegal ones. Taking blood - he’s a bit surprised when he finds out you’re kind of scared of that and needles and such. Doesn’t know what to do at first but he decides to just ramble on about his experiments and discoveries (Dottore knows you enjoy it) to distract you and then gives you a little kith and chuckles when you’re surprised it’s over that quickly. (Now im just thinking abt fragile reader running away since they might not like all the shots and medicine he has to give them) Also checking your heartbeat - every time he gets hella smug and cocky because your heart always races so fast when he’s so close to you “Oh? Is everything alright? Your heart is going rather fast… certainly not normal. I wonder, what could be the reason?”
Sitting on Dot’s lap while he does work >>> Even with all the clones he has he still gets stuck checking some boring papers every once in a while, and you just like. Sit on his lap and peer at them curiously. Also bothers him by pulling his little cheeks and kissing them <3 and nod enthusiastically as he discusses science stuff. (No fr all the dottores despise the regular Fatui assistants and some of them have gone missing 💀)
Okay angst… I’ll never get over the clones being deleted im in tears (I pretend I do not see it) Zandik never missed his clones more than in this instance. Sure, they fought a lot and caused problems sometimes. But he knew that nothing would ever happen to you because they would protect you at all times. And now it just so happens that damn Traveler had to come at the worst time possible, when security was low. Of course he knows the Traveler not trust him whatsoever and he doesn’t like them either, so the idea of you being with them alarms him more than he liked to admit.
No one is immune to desire. Not Archons or humans. And you are what he desires and loves wholly, so he won’t let anything hurt you. He may be at a disadvantage, but he is the Second Harbinger for a reason. 
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katkit14 · 2 years
Text
First year's if they had an S/O with Type 1 diebtes
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Oof this accautly took me a long time to write. Not cause I had no ideas ( that to though) but because I'm lazy lol. I think I may do dorm leaders next but idk.
Romantic relationship established
Gender Neutral reader
Warnings : Slight cussing
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Ace
He most certainly is gonna tease you, but not in hateful way
Pokes fun about eating sugary snacks and once you explain he's like " oh yeah I knew that"
He doesn't fully understand diebetes but actually tries more if your his s/o
Will get panicked when you have a low and doesn't know how to help and kinda gets mad at himself but will never admit it
Will never tell you but will secretly stock up on candy or juice after
He's somewhat helpful
He'll squeeze your arms when you dose ( if you don't have a pump) and will obviously pull put candy or juice when you need
If you use a cgm and pump ( or just one of those) he'll learn how to change the sites but of you choose to point that out he'll deny ever even helping you
Learned not to mess with you when you're blood sugar is high
Only he is allowed to make fun of you over your diabetes so he will fight someone over bothering you about your diabetes
Overall kinda a tsundere but still cute
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Deuce
Doesn't understand what diabetes is but fully listen when and if you explain
Is somewhat helpful but relies on you to teach him
He takes a bit but will learn
Don't trust him with the snacks. He tries his best to protect them from Grim and Ace but is outsmarted
If this happens he'll feel bad and go buy you new snacks
Is always willing to help and if you teach him
he'll help give doses or help change sites ( if you have a cgm or pump) but is scared of needles so he doesn't help if you have to dose by needle
Is always scared he's gonna hurt you somehow though and needs reasurance he won't and isn't
Can and will go full bad boy mode if someone wants to mess with you
Overall tries his best and is a pretty good boyfriend
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Jack
He doesn't understand at the beginning but if you're his s/o, you best believe he is gonna keep going until he does
Will stop Grim and Ace from eating your snacks
Gets you glucose tablets so you don't have to eat candy cause " candy isn't good for you" ( he's a dick, those taste terrible)
Sams shop really does have everything
Is a bit afraid of needles but gets over it rather quickly and is able to help you with dosing or site changes
Encourages you when you have highs to go on runs with him and throws a water bottle at you
Lectures you about eating right if you don't already ( he'd do that even if you weren't diabetic)
Knows if you have a high and low before you do cause super senses
Is overall a good boy and a good boyfriend
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Epel
I headcanon that his grandma has diabetes probably type 2 ( it's common in elderly people)
He thinks he knows
Gets mad when he realizes he doesn't *angry feral germlin noises*
Takes his time to understand type 1 and will try his best to help
Isn't scared of needles so he his more then willing to help dose you or change cites
Doesn't know what to do when your blood sugars low so kinda just stands there
Will ask later on what he should do
Will not tolerate anyone making fun of you and will probably cause a scene. It'll be worse since you're his s/o so you might have to call Vil
Speaking of Vil, he will still use you as an excuse to get out of stuff with Vil.
Overall not bad but could be more helpful
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Sebek
He fully doesn't understand
I'm not sure he ever will
He doesn't care if you are his s/o he will continue to call humans pathetic
Will pout if you point out he is half human
He does get concerned though and does try to help. He'll even go to Lilia for help or even research on his own
He starts to understand some of it but not all
He doesn't really help much with dosing or site changes but he does help bring out snacks
Will help protect your snacks from Grim and Ace and won't really tolerate people taking your food
Will not tolerate people making fun of you or bothering you * cue yelling lectures*
He will lecture you on eating so many sweets until you explain you need them and now he feels bad
He buys you apple juice
Overall tries but yells a lot
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wordy-little-witch · 3 months
Text
So I watched Oppenheimer ((mostly)) for the first time last night and decided some of the lines were. Really good. By golly they were GREAT.
But the movie itself kinda pissed me off, so I stopped about halfway through. Anyway, have some weird incorrect quote meets snippet looking shit bc I love competent Buggy and he deserves to be a lil mad genius
Crocodile had low expectations went he stepped out of the meeting room. Now largely, this would not come as a surprise. He always lowered expectations when Buggy was involved - it was the best he could do for his nerves. The clown was several ounces of unhinged, in both ways expected and entirely, indubitably, vivaciously NOT.
As it was, the logia user believed he avoided aneurysms by sheer luck in the beginning.
Nowadays things had settled more or less. The Guild was running very well, all things considered, their profit was steadily increasing, and every soul on the island had a job or niche they filled happily. He'd even found a few places where Buggy flourished.
This meeting was regarding one of those niches. Aside from being the front man and face of the operation, the clown was also their most skilled chemist, chief explosives expert, and general all-arounder. While he may not go toe to toe with another Emperor in a 1v1 fight, the clown made his uses elsewhere. He was not the blade, the smoking barrel, the weapon - he was the oil in the mechanics of the crew, the fuel to the fires and the one who, more often than not, made the weapons in their hands.
The most recent weapon was the topic for today.
And Buggy was missing.
Annoyed as he was, the logia user remained outwardly calm as he skirted around town in search of the wayward clown. At first, they thought the other may be helping with the legwork of the lower ranks - wouldn't be the first time, certainly would nit be the last - but none of them had seen hide nor hair of the Chairman in days. Unperturbed, Crocodile sent them back to work and continued the search.
Docks were a bust.
The gardens had no hint of blue beyond the specially bred flowers in the back.
The announcement tent was void of bright hair and red noses.
The circus tent had few humans, none of which had seen their captain.
Luckily, Mohji was quick to recommend the kitchens. It was not nearly yet time for a meal, he admitted, but when Buggy fixates on something interesting, he sometimes seems to forget he had a body, let alone one with needs.
That, too, of course, wound up being a failure.
He'd plowed through three cigars already in the impromptu adventures around the isle, and so he was quite close to losing his temper with the apparent and damning lack of clown. Pinching the bridge of his nose, he tried breathing deeply, carefully, working to dampen the embers of rage and fury from a blaze to something smoldering.
It was, ironically, Alvida and Cabaji, who deigned to metaphorically poke the bear otherwise known as their superior, Galdino bustling about back in the kitchens beyond the counter tops.
"What are you looking for?"
"Fucking Hell," he managed to grit out, shooting a look to the duo before him. Cabaji seemed to cringe back minutely, but Alvida just barely winced. "Don't suppose you've seen the damned clown today?"
"Not yet," Al shrugged with a frown, "but once Gal finishes up his... thing over there-" she gestured over to the candle man still aggressively piling snacks and drinks into a bag, "- we're going to find him."
"Well," the older man barked a mirthless laugh, "I can definitely tell you where he's not. Been looking for his ass since seven."
Alvida grimaced, nodding while her fingers toyed with the end of her mace. "Yikes. Meeting?"
"Obviously."
"Captain had a tendency," Cabaji cut in with a rueful expression, "to fixate far too long on something interesting - usually to... rather unpleasant results."
The logia user gave a low growl of a hum, flicking ash from his cigar. "I'll be sure to show him unpleasant once I find him. Bastard missed our meeting and still has yet to show."
The dark haired woman pursed her lips, eyes narrowing. One could nearly see the gears turning in her head. "For the weapons?"
"Somethijg like that," he nodded, "it was initially the firearms he was designing and testing, but it's since expanded to the bombs and other explosives he's been blabbering on about." Glancing down, he paused at the wide eyed look on the other two, shooting a glance over to see Galdino now quietly screaming to himself as he grabbed several first aid kits to throw into the bag. Arching a brow, he turned back. "... am I missing something here?"
"When was the last time you saw him??"
He paused, averted his gaze in consideration. Last glimpse of the clown had been.... what, when they'd gotten the shipment in for Mihawk's eyeliner? Buggy had been picking up something at the docks and had been practically vibrating, in casual clothes as opposed to his onesie suit as he jabbered some poor girl's ear off over a strangely colored box. The emblem had been for a chemical company, he believed, one of the few that Buggy actually trusted to order ores and such from. That had been back on the 23rd. He relayed this to the others.
Alvids winced. Cabaji sighed. Galdino went into the walk in freezer, sealed the door, and muffled screams were heard before he came back out with a tub of ice cream.
"He's probably at his workshop," the wax man stated plainly. "Mohji said he was there on his last shift."
"Shift?"
"Buggy wrangling," the woman answered simply. "When that idiot gets too invested, everything else falls away. Short of a crew emergency, he's essentially a hermit. We take shifts to check on him, make sure he eats or hasn't died somehow."
Crocodile vaguely wanted for a different plant in his smoke source if only to mitigate the pounding in his temples, but he simply nodded, gesturing for them to lead the way.
As it turned out, Buggy's general workshop was near his tent.
His experimental workshop was much, much further out.
And there was cackling coming from inside.
When Galdino took point, the other two fell into place at his back. Believing it to be far from necessary for such formations, Crocodile considered barging past them all.
Then the door swung open and a blue blur damn near slammed into the wax user.
Buggy was a veritable mess, smudges on his cheeks, a line pressed across his cheek bones and bridge of his nose, mildly irritated from the red-pink lines. The shadows around his eyes made the blue of his irises seem lighter than usual, especially with the glassy, manic spark to them. His hair was in a bun, mostly, loose strands bouncing with the many pencils, pens and.... beaker(???) tucked in there.
He was sans makeup, only the barest red stain to hip lips, Crocodile noticed, as the giggly man almost squealed.
"Guys! Oh em gee, hiiii~" His arms clung to the taller man, almost clambering up as her shimmied and bounced. "I did a thing," he blabbered excitedly, "and it's SO COOL and I wanna tell Croco-chan and Hawky and everyone and it's gonna be so cool, I promise, so super duper mega ultra cool and- OH HI CROCCY COME SEE!!!!"
As if the natural whirlwind of a clown was not bad enough, it seemed Buggy was running on pure liquid energy. Hands coveted in gloves clenched hard on his hook and bodily dragged him into the workshop as their owner seemed to word vomit in a language all too unknown for the businessman to follow. He caught a few bits and pieces of things here and there, trying to follow the other and rebalance himself - the blue haired man had nearly yanked him straight off his feet - when he caught sight of some chalk boards, cork boards and entirely too many letters, numbers, symbols and a graph, of all things, emblazoned nearly across the entire far wall.
Alvida sighed softly, earning a glance. She gestured back to Buggy.
When he turned, it was to be met with the clown bouncing on his toes, clapping as he looked between the larger man and a decently sized ball on the table.
Uncertain as to what exactly he was looking at and unsure of how exactly to handle this manic man, Crocodile simply blinked. "What... is this, again?"
"It's my prototype," the other squeaked, moving to rub his cheeks roughly with a grin, hands falling to shake roughly at shoulder height as he beamed. "See, I was working on those guns ya know. And so as I was doing the papers, I was thinking to myself, 'ya know buggy ol boy, you haven't checked the Idea Book in a while' and so I was like 'yeah, brain I haven't!!' So I DID and when I did, I saw some old theories on explosives and how Buster Calls work because the Navy is fucking batshit and decided anyone not good enough for them deserves to blow up so then I thought 'oh I wanna make my own buster call but BUGGY STYLE', so I went to my theory section and theory can take you only so far, so THEN I reached out to Emie-chan!!! And she had some AWESOME scientific journals because she works for Sky-Lines, that big big big lab, and I was reading them and it HIT ME, HYDROGEN!!!!" Small but calloused gloved hands caught Croc's hoop again as Buggy turns back to rambling, the former catching a few words here and there between the waterfall of words. Something about neutrons, chain reactions, and heavy hydrogen? He blanked.
"Buggy," a softer voice cut in. The two highest ranking men in the room turned, catching sight of Alvida and Cabaji both frowning, the former leaning into the latter while Galdino tried to hand her an apple. The wax man had spoken, looking to the captain. "I'm sorry to interrupt but 'Vida's been feeling unwell for a while-"
Immediately, the unstoppable hurricane of a clown seemed to practically teleport with the speed he got over there with. "What happened, what's wrong?"
"Cramps," she grimaced, hand moving to her abdomen. "No big deal, Bugs-"
"You haven't eaten," Cabaji cut in with a definite attempt at a worried scowl.
"I don't want to," she grumbled, taking hidden glances at Buggy.
The jester for his part took her hands gently. "You gotta eat, Vida, it should help your body settle."
She put on a show of deliberating, then, in a voice Crocodile had never heard from her before, she struck. "Will you eat with me?"
"Of course," Buggy assured, reaching out to take the apple in hand. A green one was handed to Alvida and they playfully bonked the two fruits together before biting into them.
Buggy hummed. "These are pretty good! Ya know, I don't think I've had this kind of apple before what kind is it?"
"Night night apples."
"What."
And then suddenly there was a thump, the other three quickly separating while Galdino pulled out the first aid kit, Alvida grabbing a cloth, and Cabaji checking other over for injuries.
Crocodile stared.
"What the fuck just happened?"
"Sometimes you gotta manipulate a clown into eating a drugged apple," Vida said without hesitation. "Any concussion?"
"Seems fine," Cabaji nodded, glancing to Galdino who quickly confirmed.
Once certain there were no wouldst, Alvida passed over the cloth and went to a filing cabinet, humming softly as she flicked through the folders before pulling out one covered in cutesy duck stickers, labeled 'for croco-baby' on the tab. She handed it over with a smile.
Now possibly far more confused than before, he took the folder and watched as the unicyclist picked up the clown easily and all three trotted out casually. He watched them head back to the tents, carefully avoiding prying eyes, and dip into Buggy's personal tent with no ounce of hesitation.
Fucking hell.
He needed a stiff drink. Or several.
He looked at the folder. A little duck sticker was winking at him, holding a heart.
Make that damned case.
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haven-is-happy · 11 months
Text
How Battle Changes: Senator
Chapter 3
Pairing: Dogma x Jedi!reader, platonic Wolfpack,
Chapter description: Dogma has to take care of you after rather devastating news have been revealed to you
Warnings: shit stars going down in this chapter, angst, reader has guilt,
Wordcount: 1,3 k
Masterlist
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Dogma isn’t sure when exactly the Wolfpack started respecting him as their Commander’s partner.
Maybe it was that time he instinctively went to you when the infamous Cad Bane broke into the jedi temple, just to make sure you’re safe. Or it could be the time he showed up just before Plo Koon and 104th deployed, asking for you at the steps leading to the Triumphant flagship, just to give you a packet of your favourite snacks to take with you.
He still doesn’t know the exact moment, but he sure is glad it happened.
For the first time in his life, he sees Wolffe exuding emotion (other than anger) in the presence of someone else, in Dogma’s presence no less. He knows that if he asked you, you’d tell him about the colour of his aura being a mix of yellow and green, a mesh of two colours synonymous with worry and unease.
But he can’t ask you, because you are near-catatonic, being carried into your apartment in Comet’s arms.
A single message from your comm, one written by Sinker, was enough to send him running.
“I don’t know what happened. We were talking to a senator about our campaign happening near their system. The senator said something to them and they just shut down. They looked at the senator like he struck them… they refused to move from the spot and nearly collapsed.”
Sinker’s description certainly didn’t make him feel better.
He takes you and closes the door with his foot, but not before shooting Wolffe a pointed “I’ll update you when I can, don’t worry” look.
He sets you down on the bed. The stare you shoot at the ceiling, void of *anything*, makes his insides churn more than any red lightsaber ever could.
He prepares your favourite food. There’s no love in it like usual. No singing and laughing as you chop up the ingredients. He knows it’s damaging to his own brain, to not be in bed with you, to hug you until you spill your whole mind to him, but you need anything and everything to make you come back out of the dark place your mind takes you to. 
He sets the food on the small table in your room and looks at you.
You haven't moved at all. It takes you too long to blink.
He lays down next to you and stares at the same spot as you.
Defaulting to a calming breathing rhythm makes him all too aware that you are slow to inhale and exhale. If he had to ever describe an unhealthy Force trance to someone, he’d paint the picture he looks at now.
The food has long gone cold when one of your hands moves and grasps one of Dogma’s.
It takes everything to not immediately crush you in a hug. But you need space.
He doesn’t dare move. The silence is too fragile.
“The senator knew.”
Dogma’s eyes snap to your face. Your profile still looks gorgeous as ever, but your expression is hollow. The spot on the ceiling you are still examining must be charred beyond comprehension right now.
“Knew what?”
“He knew about the ion cannon.”
He heard about this story from you only once. 
Because that’s how many times you’ve had the strength to speak about it.
He read the reports. He heard the accounts of Wolffe, Sinker, Boost and Comet, even Plo Koon himself.
You never gave an official statement. It was all too painful for you. The way the auras around your men went bright black with fear, shining to make nothing else visible. You describe it as the most heartbreaking thing you have ever experienced, the emotions all eventually turning black and then dying out as the heart stops beating.
He met you months after it happened. But you told him to ask Wolffe how you fared then. You couldn’t recount it without having nightmares later.
“He read the report?” he asks quietly.
You let out a shaky breath. It’s like you are simultaneously full and void of emotions.
“No, he…” you trail off. 
Dogma sees the signs of oncoming tears. You bite your bottom lip to make it stop wobbling, rapidly blink your eyes to banish the tears - and then they slip down and stain your skin.
“Before he was a senator, he was a head engineer in a company neutral about the war. He said he needed funding, so he- he leaked the schematics to the separatists so the republic would give him money to make ships resistant to the cannon… he caused the whole thing,” you get out before you start sobbing. Your hand in his puts it into a deathgrip and you roll over to curl around him.
He hugs you closer with his other arm and lets you sob into his chest.
He knows they have to detain the senator, as he could be a security threat in the republic. But as the hours go on and your crying slowly fades into a coma-like sleep, he wonders why the senator told you… well, anything at all. He would have absolutely gotten away with divulging weapon schematic to the highest bidder, had he not taunted you.
A jedi padawan, someone who would be naturally able to tell if he’s lying.
Something just isn’t fitting right.
When you wake up a few hours later, Dogma is still in the same position. He was unable to get even a wink of sleep.
He asks minimal questions. He re-heats your favourite food, makes you sit down and eat it and watches some holodrama with you. Anything to distract you from the fact that your eyes are still puffy from hours of crying and that your muscles hurt from the rigid hold you had on his hand, even in your sleep.
The update he sent Wolffe while you showered was extensive, quoting you verbatim about the senator. The message is marked “read” the second he sends it.
There is no message back other than “understood. We’ll deal with it.”
Your comm beeps. You check it to see a notice about impromptu shore leave.
It makes you stare at the wall in a similar fashion to yesterday.
“Love, you want to watch another episode?”
“I’m thinking of leaving the Order,” you reply back, as if you did not hear the prior question.
In the silence that follows, one could hear a pin drop from kilometres away.
“Why?” Your boyfriend doesn’t ask if you’re sure, if you thought this through. Your tone says enough.
“They’ll want my official statement. I’ll have to interrogate him and figure out why the Republic officers missed all of this the first time they questioned him. Then, I’ll have to look Wolffe in the eye and tell him why I have failed to bring our brothers’ killer to justice.”
You visibly swallow down your tears and throw your head back against the couch in frustration.
“The Senate won’t do anything about it though. The company the senator owns is one of the top ship manufacturers. The Republic owes him billions of credits. He’ll suggest the debt be null-and-void instead of him going to jail, and then the GAR will order millions worth more in weapons.”
Just as Dogma goes to pull you into his chest and hide you from reality, you stand up from the couch.
You make it three steps towards the door of your apartment before your knee buckles and you fall to the ground with a pain-filled wail.
Every sob makes your body move, flinching as if going against strong rain. It takes less than a second for you to get enveloped into the familiar warmth of your lover’s arms, but it does nothing to soothe the raw pain filling the room.
When you speak, your voice is hoarse, yet filled with steel determination and anger.
“I’ll be able to calculate just how much every life that cannon took was worth to the Republic.”
Previous Chapter / Next Chapter
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Note
Hello love,
I wanted to request a queen/bohrhap cast ship, please?🤍
My name's Anna, I'm 20, bi and an Aries.
I'm 5'4" with very long dark brown hair down to my butt, my eyes are also dark brown. I've got tan skin. I don't personally think I'm that short, but my friends are all taller than me. I'd describe my style as a mix of 70s boho and 90s grunge with a bit of cottagecore thrown in there too.
I can be a bit shy and awkward at first, but I've gotten a little more confident over the years. I overthink a lot, sometimes my brain can't stop running in circles. That's why I'm not a very spontaneous person. I can get angry very fast (fire signs complicating my life) and I may not forget, but I certainly forgive. I'm smart and a quick learner. I'm also stubborn and don't cope well with being criticised by friends or family.
I've started to enjoy spending more time on my own and try to make the best of most situations. I guess I'm an optimistic realist.
I like staying in reading or watching films, and i love autumn. I'm studying textile design, so I like knitting, sewing, crafting and started making my own clothes a few years ago. Other than that I also draw a lot. I played a few instruments in my life, currently trying to teach myself how to play the ukulele, and I like singing. I'm interested in mythologies and lore.
That's it I think 🥰 I hope you have a lovely day! 🌿🤍 and thank you so much !
Hi there!!!
I say, I ship you with...
Roger Taylor!
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Looking at Roger in the 70s, he would have LOVED your sense of style! You both would go shopping together and get all sorts of cool outfits!
You both sound similar- very smart and fiery. You both wouldn't be able to shut up and even at band events when he brings you, it would be like you two are the only people in the room. And even the others watch you like the audience at a movie.
I think he'd appreciate your creations. Once you gave him a drawing of him and even when he is on tour, he always keeps it by him
Plus, he would be very protective. If you ran into any criticism, he would rush to your defense and chew down the other person for it, on hand draped over you! And usually, when it gets cold, he wears a bit of knitwear that you made especially for him proudly!
For BohRap, I ship you with...
Joe Mazzello!
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He is organized so you both enjoy planning out the most fun dates! You would get him up and out and about to have some fun be it ice skating or axe throwing! He makes you laugh and relax!
Since you both love movies, imagine watching movies with him and hearing all of his insight on all of your favorite flicks. His observations on the acting, writing, and filming all while you cuddle and share snacks become almost more interesting than the actual movie!
He would be drawn to your shorter height. He's of average height so he feels bigger and more protective of you. He'd like to clutch your hand or hug you and love on you.
He would love to see and support your crafts as you support his own artistry! He'd see sketches and go "hmmmm" and give his ideas. Plus, you can just imagine teaching him to knit or spending a day crafting together! He would love and get to it like a duck with water!
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redmoonwanderer · 1 year
Text
FFXIV Write 2023, Day 4 Prompt: Off the Hook
When the day of Felha’s First Hunt came, Qhol’a was told to stay in the camp. “The behemoth is old and dangerous. If it finds you, it won’t hesitate to kill you.”
Qhol’a had crossed his arms and looked about as irritated as any child that’s been denied something exciting. Qhol didn’t budge under the pressure of the stare of her youngest, and he had to give in, watch his oldest sister leave the camp with their mother and few other hunters.
Sair’sae, the father to his sisters, stands behind him and places a hand on his shoulder. “Your time will come, young one,” he says, voice gentle as always, and his smile the same. Qhol’a simply huffs, because his time is so far away and this camp is boring.
He stomps from the man that could be his father, too, the way he loves him, and disappears between the tents. He entertains himself for a time, throwing rocks at a tree, but he can’t forget his sister is out there having fun, and he wonders if he could find the beast before her.
Most certainly! He decides just as he throws a rock in an abandoned nest. He’s quiet, he can track. He’s a hunter, too!
He looks around to make sure no one is watching him, then runs off into the woods.
---
The forest gets silent the further home he walks, and that gets him wary because he knows that’s a sign there’s something here that the animals of the woods wish to avoid. His feet make no sound as he carefully proceeds deeper into the quiet, sometimes forgetting to breathe when he stops to listen to a sound.
He sees heavy footprints and claw marks on tree trunks, and walks barely minutes after before the low grunt of a beast catches his ears.
He stops, tilts his head to locate it.
Rustling. There!
He will not fight the beast, but he will see it, because then he can prove that he found it before his sister.
Though silence falls yet again, he’s confident as he proceeds to a clearing, on the other side of which is a high rock.
No behemoth, though.
He furrows his brows as he walks forward, touching ground with his hand where it seems the beast lay just moments ago. Warm.
A cloud slides over the sun and leaves him in shadow, but he still feels its warmth in his neck.
A growl
“Qhol’a!” Sair’sae’s voice, shouting
Something hits him from the side
Arms wrapping around him
They tumble to the side
Stop
Hands, tight on his shoulders, as Sair’sae looks him over. He seems angry, and when he looks over his shoulder, the behemoth hesitates.
Qhol’a notices the blood on his clothes and holds back tears.
Sair’sae doesn’t let the beast out of his sight when he picks up the child and backs away. When the beast moves to follow, he hisses words Qhol’a doesn’t recognise, and his face is pressed against his chest, so he can’t see what happens.
But Sair’sae doesn’t run, just walks.
When the forest speaks again, he lowers him down. “I think,” he says, and Qhol’a looks at him with wet eyes, “your mother said you should stay behind.”
With trembling hands, Qhol’a signs, “I know but I wanted to find it! I wasn’t going to kill it, I swear, or fight, or – “
Sair’sae kneels, pressing his hands on Qhol’a’s. “I believe you. But your mother told you to not go with the hunters because it could have killed you. It knew you were there, little one, and had I not noticed you were gone, you would be a behemoth snack, right now.”
Qhol’a nods, sniffling.
Sair’sae smiles a gentle smile, and pulls Qhol’a into a hug. “This time, I won’t say anything to Qhol, but you must promise me you will be careful from now on. No more behemoth hunting until you’re old enough, alright?”
Qhol’a nods again, and once he’s calmed, they return to the camp, where Sair’sae gets the scratches on his back treated, coming up with a story for them when asked.
And when the hunters return, celebrating Felha’s success, he keeps his word and never tells another soul what Qhol’a did that day.
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moonswolfie · 1 year
Text
Sleeping beauty
Ushijima x fem!reader
The reader and ushijima aren't together but mutual pining is involved
This is based off a chapter of Komi-san can't communicate
I was in a mood to write for ushijima but I didn't know what to write (does that ever happen to you guys too?) but then i thought of this and I was like PERFECT
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"Hey, girls. Want snacks?" one of your friends pulled out a plethora of different snacks from her bag.
"When did you get this?" your other friend asked, surprised at the amount.
"You know, at various locations. I got some at the vending machine in front of the inn, I got some at one of the shops, I got some when the two of you weren't looking-"
"Yeah, okay, okay, I get it. Sometimes I wonder how you're not morbidly obese yet." your friend cut off her explanation.
"It's called moderation. I don't eat snacks all the time. Come on, defend me here-" your friend pleaded to you, but stopped once she realised you were asleep.
"Oh, she fell asleep." she added.
Your friends both checked if you were really asleep, poking you lightly. When you didn't move, the two of them smiled mischeviously.
"I think it's time..." one of them said with a smirk on her face, the other nodding in agreement.
The two walked across the train, leaving you alone.
"Ushijima-san, Ushijima-san!" they yelled, grabbing his attention from his seat. Tendou looks back over his seat, raising a brow at the girls.
"Yes?" he answered, also turning his head back to look at the girls.
"We need you to watch over our friend." the two explained in unison, smiling in an awfully suspicious manner.
"Ah. Can you get someone else to do it?" he asked in a calm tone which irked your friends.
"No can do, you're the only one." your friend said in an annoyed tone, pulling on Ushijima's arm, but it did nothing since Ushijima was way stronger than her.
Reon and Tendou exchanged confused glances.
Tendou looked back to see you sleeping alone in your seat and realised what they were trying to do.
"Wakatoshi, just go~" he gently urged him with the same suspicious smile the girls were wearing. Ushijima looked at Tendou, then at your friends and wordlessly stood up. Victorious smiles beamed on your friends faces as one of them lead Ushijima off to you.
The other sat down in Ushijima's seat. "I'm just sitting here for good measure in case he tries to return." she explained.
"What are you guys doing?" Reon asked, being the only one out of the loop on the situation.
"Wakatoshi's crush fell asleep and they're trying to get them to sit together." Tendou explained, your friend nodding in confirmation.
"Ah, I see."
Ushijima's eyes widened upon seeing that their friend was you, but he quickly hid his surprise.
"So I'm going to talk to some friends further back in the train and I need you to watch over this sleeping beauty, okay?" your friend explained, not leaving any room for him to say anything. "Go on, sit down next to her."
She didn't leave until he did so, and now he was alone, sitting next to you.
He took a second (or a minute) to admire your cute sleeping face. He actually didn't mind being interrupted anymore, not when he had an opportunity to admire you up close.
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You woke up, slowly blinking your eyes open and examining your sorroundings. You were still on the train ride home.
Seems running around all day on the last day of the trip tired you out quite a lot.
You were leaning on someone's shoulder, and you were about to lift your head to apologise to your friend when you realised it was most certainly not your friend.
This person was much larger and taller than any of your friends, and they smelled like....
You jolted your head upwards to be met with Ushijima's sharp gaze on you.
No way.
You screamed internally. What the heck?! How did you end up asleep on your crushes shoulder?!
"You're awake." he stated, still looking at you.
"Oh my god- Ushijima I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to-" you had no idea what to say, you were so overwhelmed and embarrased by the situation.
"Oh, I don't mind." Ushijima said blankly, but he was fighting his blush on the inside.
"I'm so glad..." you mumbled, internally thanking the gods that Ushijima wasn't angry at you. But what if you drooled on him? What if you made strange noises while asleep?
"You look peaceful when you sleep." he said. It was simply an observation of his, but it affected you in ways he could never think of. He was watching you sleep?!
"Um... Thanks?" you didn't know what to say and your certainly didn't want to think about how red your face must be right now.
A very awkward silence ensued.
"Did you enjoy the trip?" you asked an emergency question because the silence was getting unbearable. He nodded and simply replied "Yes, it was quite fun."
"Give me something to work with here..." you mumbled, trying to think of something else to ask him.
"Did you enjoy yourself?" he asked suddenly, making you reccollect your thoughts.
"Oh, yes! Me and my friend went to see the..." he smiled slightly at you as you rambled on about all the things you and your friends did over the week.
He's just glad you didn't catch him playing with your hair while you were asleep.
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Sooo, how was it? Is it creepy to know someone's smell? I feel like ushijima would have a distinct smell
Guys, please send me requests I have a big big BIG motivation to write right now but no ideas what to write about
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