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colleendoran · 8 months

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Great Big Good Omens Graphic Novel Update

AKA A Visit From Bildad the Shuhite.

The past year or so has been one long visit from this guy, whereupon he smiteth my goats and burneth my crops, woe unto the woeful cartoonist.

Gaze upon the horror of Bildad the Shuhite.

You kind of have to be a Good Omens fan to get this joke, but trust me, it's hilarious.

Anyway, as a long time Good Omens novel fan, you may imagine how thrilled I was to get picked to adapt the graphic novel.

Go me!

This is quite a task, I have to say, especially since I was originally going to just draw (and color) it, but I ended up writing the adaptation as well. Tricky to fit a 400 page novel into a 160-ish page graphic novel, especially when so much of the humor is dependent on the language, and not necessarily on the visuals.

Not complainin', just sayin'.

Anyway, I started out the gate like a herd of turtles, because right away I got COVID which knocked me on my butt.

And COVID brain fog? That's a thing. I already struggle with brain fog due to autoimmune disease, and COVID made it worse.

Not complainin' just sayin'.

This set a few of the assignments on my plate back, which pushed starting Good Omens back.

But hey, big fat lead time! No worries!

Then my computer crawled toward the grave.

My trusty MAC Pro Tower was nearly 15 years old when its sturdy heart ground to a near-halt with daily crashes. I finally got around to doing some diagnostics; some of its little brain actions were at 5% functionality. I had no reliable backups.

There are so many issues with getting a new computer when you haven't had a new computer or peripherals in nearly fifteen years and all of your software, including your Photoshop program is fifteen years old.

At the time, I was still on rural internet...which means dial-up speed.

Whatever you have for internet in the city, roll that clock back to about 2001.

That's what I had. I not only had to replace almost all of my hardware but I had to load and update all programs at dial-up speed.

Welcome to my gigabyte hell.

The entire process of replacing the equipment and programs took weeks and then I had to relearn all the software.

All of this was super expensive in terms of money and time cost.

But I was not daunted! Nosirree!

I still had a huge lead time! I can do anything! I have an iron will!

And boy, howdy, I was going to need it.

At about the same time, a big fatcat quadrillionaire client who had hired me years ago to develop a big, major transmedia project for which I was paid almost entirely in stock, went bankrupt leaving everyone holding the bag, and taking a huge chunk of my future retirement fund with it.

I wrote a very snarky almost hilarious Patreon post about it, but am not entirely in a position to speak freely because I don't want to get sued. Even though I had to go to court over it, (and I had to do that over Zoom at dial-up speed,) I'm pretty sure I'll never get anything out of this drama, and neither will anyone else involved, except millionaire dude and his buddies who all walked away with huge multi-million dollar bonuses weeks before they declared bankruptcy, all the while claiming they would not declare bankruptcy.

Even the accountant got $250,000 a month to shut down the business, while creators got nothing.

That in itself was enough drama for the year, but we were only at February by that point, and with all those months left, 2023 had a lot more to throw at me.

Fresh from my return from my Society of Illustrators show, and a lovely time at MOCCA, it was time to face practical medical issues, health updates, screening, and the like. I did my adult duty and then went back to work hoping for no news, but still had a weird feeling there would be news.

I know everyone says that, but I mean it. I had a bad feeling.

Then there was news.

I was called back for tests and more tests. This took weeks. The ubiquitous biopsy looked, even to me staring at the screen in real time, like bad news.

It also hurt like a mofo after the anesthesia wore off. I wasn't expecting that.

Then I got the official bad news.

Cancer which runs in my family finally got me. Frankly, I was surprised I didn't get it sooner.

Stage 0, and treatment would likely be fast and complication-free. Face the peril, get it over with, and get back to work.

I requested surgery months in the future so I could finish Good Omens first, but my doc convinced me the risk of waiting was too great. Get it done now.

"You're really healthy," my doc said. Despite an auto-immune issue which plagues me, I am way healthier than the average schmoe of late middle age. She informed me I would not even need any chemo or radiation if I took care of this now.

So I canceled my appearance at San Diego Comic Con. I did not inform the Good Omens team of my issues right away, thinking this would not interfere with my work schedule, but I did contact my agent to inform her of the issue. I also contacted a lawyer to rewrite my will and make sure the team had access to my digital files in case there were complications.

Then I got back to work, and hoped for the best.

Eff this guy.

Before I could even plant my carcass on the surgery table, I got a massive case of ocular shingles.

I didn't even know there was such a thing.

There I was, minding my own business. I go to bed one night with a scratchy eye, and by 4 PM the next day, I was in the emergency room being told if I didn't get immediate specialist treatment, I was in big trouble.

I got transferred to another hospital and got all the scary details, with the extra horrid news that I could not possibly have cancer surgery until I was free of shingles, and if I did not follow a rather brutal treatment procedure - which meant super-painful eye drops every half hour, twenty-four hours a day and daily hospital treatment - I could lose the eye entirely, or be blinded, or best case scenario, get permanent eye damage.

What was even funnier (yeah, hilarity) is the drops are so toxic if you don't use the medication just right, you can go blind anyway.

Hi Ho.

Ulcer is on the right. That big green blob.

I had just finished telling my cancer surgeon I did not even really care about getting cancer, was happy it was just stage zero, had no issues with scarring, wanted no reconstruction, all I cared about was my work.

Just cut it out and get me back to work.

And now I wondered if I was going to lose my ability to work anyway.

Shingles often accompanies cancer because of the stress on the immune system, and yeah, it's not pretty. This is me looking like all heck after I started to get better.

The first couple of weeks were pretty demoralizing as I expected a straight trajectory to wellness. But it was up and down all the way.

Some days I could not see out of either eye at all. The swelling was so bad that I had to reach around to my good eye to prop the lid open. Light sensitivity made seeing out of either eye almost impossible. Outdoors, even with sunglasses, I had to be led around by the hand.

I had an amazing doctor. I meticulously followed his instructions, and I think he was surprised I did. The treatment is really difficult, and if you don't do it just right no matter how painful it gets, you will be sorry.

To my amazement, after about a month, my doctor informed me I had no vision loss in the eye at all. "This never happens," he said.

I'd spent a couple of weeks there trying to learn to draw in the near-dark with one eye, and in the end, I got all my sight back.

I could no longer wear contact lenses (I don't really wear them anyway, unless I'm going to the movies,) would need hard core sun protection for awhile, and the neuralgia and sun sensitivity were likely to linger. But I could get back to work.

I have never been more grateful in my life.

Neuralgia sucks, by the way, I'm still dealing with it months later.

Anyway, I decided to finally go ahead and tell the Good Omens team what was going on, especially since this was all happening around the time the Kickstarter was gearing up.

Now that I was sure I'd passed the eye peril, and my surgery for Stage 0 was going to be no big deal, I figured all was a go. I was still pretty uncomfortable and weak, and my ideal deadline was blown, but with the book not coming out for more than a year, all would be OK. I quit a bunch of jobs I had lined up to start after Good Omens, since the project was going to run far longer than I'd planned.

Everybody on the team was super-nice, and I was pretty optimistic at this time. But work was going pretty slow during, as you may imagine.

But again...lots of lead time still left, go me.

Then I finally got my surgery.

Which was not as happy an experience as I had been hoping for.

My family said the doc came out of the operating room looking like she'd been pulled backwards through a pipe, She informed them the tumor which looked tiny on the scan was "...huge and her insides are a mess."

Which was super not fun news.

Eff this guy.

The tumor was hiding behind some dense tissue and cysts. After more tests, it was determined I'd need another surgery and was going to have to get further treatments after all.

The biopsy had been really painful, but the discomfort was gone after about a week, so no biggee. The second surgery was, weirdly, not as painful as the biopsy, but the fatigue was big time.

By then, the Good Omens Kickstarter had about run its course, and the record-breaker was both gratifying and a source of immense social pressure.

I'd already turned most of my social media over to an assistant, and I'm glad I did.

But the next surgery was what really kicked me on my keister.

All in all, they took out an area the size of a baseball. It was hard to move and wiped me out for weeks and weeks. I could not take care of myself. I'd begun losing hair by this time anyway, and finally just lopped it off since it was too heavy for me to care for myself. The cut hides the bald spots pretty well.

After about a month, I got the go-ahead to travel to my show at the San Diego Comic Con Museum (which is running until the first week of April, BTW). I was very happy I had enough energy to do it. But as soon as I got back, I had to return to treatment.

Since I live way out in the country, going into the city to various hospitals and pharmacies was a real challenge. I made more than 100 trips last year, and a drive to the compounding pharmacy which produced the specialist eye medicine I could not get anywhere else was six hours alone.

Naturally, I wasn't getting anything done during this time.

But at least my main hospital is super swank.

The oncology treatment went smoothly, until it didn't. The feels don't hit you until the end. By then I was flattened.

So flattened that I was too weak to control myself, fell over, and smashed my face into some equipment.

Nearly tore off my damn nostril.

Eff this guy.

Anyway, it was a bad year.

Here's what went right.

I have a good health insurance policy. The final tally on my health care costs ended up being about $150,000. I paid about 18% of that, including insurance. I had a high deductible and some experimental medicine insurance didn't cover. I had savings, enough to cover the months I wasn't working, and my Patreon is also very supportive. So you didn't see me running a Gofundme or anything.

Thanks to everyone who ever bought one of my books.

No, none of that money was Good Omens Kickstarter money. I won't get most of my pay on that for months, which is just as well because it kept my taxes lower last year when I needed a break.

So, yay.

My nose is nearly healed. I opted out of plastic surgery, and it just sealed up by itself. I'll never be ready for my closeup, but who the hell cares.

I got to ring the bell.

I had a very, VERY hard time getting back to work, especially with regard to focus and concentration. My work hours dropped by over 2/3. I was so fractured and weak, time kept slipping away while I sat in the studio like a zombie. Most of the last six months were a wash.

I assumed focus issues were due (in part) to stress, so sought counseling. This seemed like a good idea at first, but when the counselor asked me to detail my issues with anxiety, I spent two weeks doing just that and getting way more anxious, which was not helpful.

After that I went EFF THIS NOISE, I want practical tools, not touchy feelies (no judgment on people who need touchy-feelies, I need a pragmatic solution and I need it now,) so tried using the body doubling focus group technique for concentration and deep work.

Within two weeks, I returned to normal work hours.

I got rural broadband, jumping me from dial up speed to 1 GB per second.

It's a miracle.

Massive doses of Vitamin D3 and K2. Yay.

The new computer works great.

The Kickstarter did so well, we got to expand the graphic novel to 200 pages. Double yay.

I'm running late, but everyone on the Good Omens team is super supportive. I don't know if I am going to make the book late or not, but if I do, well, it surely wasn't on purpose, and it won't be super late anyway. I still have months of lead time left.

I used to be something of a social media addict, but now I hardly ever even look at it, haven't been directly on some sites in over a year, and no longer miss it. It used to seem important and now doesn't.

More time for real life.

While I think the last year aged me about twenty years, I actually like me better with short hair. I'm keeping it.

OK. Rough year.

Not complainin', just sayin'.

Back to work on The Book.

And only a day left to vote for Good Omens, Neil Gaiman, and Sandman in the Comicscene Awards. Thanks.

#good omens graphic novel #good omens #terry pratchett #neil gaiman #dunmanifestin

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mellowsaturns · 8 months

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one for you and me

BUCKY BARNES X READER

summary: bucky takes care of you since you’re always taking care of others

wc: 430

warnings: fluff, sweet sweet bucky barnes, friends to implied lovers

a/n: hopping on the orange discourse

You knew he was the one when he handed you the sweet citrus fruit one afternoon.

Since the weather was getting colder, you decided to stock up on vitamins, and what better way to do it than buy boxes and boxes of oranges.

Whenever one of the team came by the kitchen, you would peel an orange for them. Or sometimes, you would just peel it and have it ready for them after their training sessions or morning jogs so they remember to get their daily dose of vitamin C.

You were reading your book by the windowsill in the living room one day when you smelled the faint bright scent.

Then, someone placed a freshly peeled orange in front of your sight. “Here you go.”

You looked up, eyes meeting Bucky’s.

You paused for a moment before reaching out and taking it from his hand. “Thank you,” you said, appreciative but kind of confused.

“How come you’re giving me this?” you asked, curious.

“You’re always looking after other people,” he answered immediately. “When was the last time you ate one yourself?”

You chuckled. “I don’t mind,” you replied, “I just came back from a long mission. I’m free for the time being anyways.”

“Still,” he added, “You’re always doing things for others. Let me do this for you,” he said, eyes gentle and sweet.

Your heart swelled at his words.

It dawned on you. Something as simple as peeling a small fruit. It gets into your nails and the juice drips down your hands sometimes. It’s an act of labour—an act of love. And Bucky wanted to do it for you. He notices. He cares.

How sweet, you think. It made the butterflies in your stomach flutter tenfold. You had to look down to hide your grin and that action within itself made Bucky blush.

“Think you can handle peeling oranges for me for the rest of your life?” you teased.

He pondered for a bit, then a small smile crept up his face. “Doesn’t sound like a bad idea,” he replied.

Although the words weren’t said, the implication was there. He’s going to be by your side. He wanted to be by your side. He’s willing to get his hands dirty and sticky.

You grabbed the delicately peeled orange and split it in half. “Here, let’s share.”

The two of you sit by the windowsill, your book half forgotten in your lap, tearing segments of the fruit and giving it to each other—something promising between the two of you in the air.

#bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes drabble #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes

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quartermera · 1 year

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Daily Actions that Ace, Sanji and Shanks Find Attractive

Hi everyone! No one requested this, but I had been thinking about doing another set of characters for a while, and I recently had the chance to write again! I hope you will like it! ! Gender & race neutral reader

Portgas D. Ace

Stretch marks. I can't explain it, but the man will kiss each of them.

Moles and freckles too.

When you wear his hat.

Or his necklace... maybe only that.

When you lick your lips from eating something good.

Digging your nails into his shoulders.

But he also loves feeling your palms against his back.

Slapping his butt playfully.

When you lean over with your elbows against the side of the ship.

Or when you lie with your feet up against a wall.

Stretching or massaging your own muscles. Ace would be very tempted to help you out with that.

When you look out in the distance with a spark in your eyes.

When you trace his freckles.

Man is not opposed to playful nudges or punches to his arms or chest.

Ace generally has a big soft spot for subtle PDA. He loves when you suddenly hold his hand.

Or to get back to it, when you slap his butt because you think no one can notice.

Or when you pull his head in your lap.

He feels very safe there.

Please give him head scratches.

Blackleg Sanji

This man would love a uniform.

He would be at your feet if it's part of your daily attire. And I include nurse or doctor's outfits (as in scrubs), air or train host.ess etc.

He loves when you watch him cook.

And he loves even more when you join him and pay close attention to doing things right.

Sucker for back hugs.

The action of painting your nails.

But also the sight of your painted nails.

Seeing you enjoy a good meal. Especially if he made it.

In another style, seeing you kick someone's butt.

Man loves someone who can take care of themselves.

But will also let him treat them like royalty afterwards.

So if you get the chance, you should absolutely lie languidly in a couch.

And let him bring you drinks, snacks and anything else you desire.

High heels. No matter your gender.

Same with stockings.

Getting sneak peaks at your lower back when you stretch or lean over.

Man cannot help but think of holding you there.

Forehead kisses!!!

Red Haired Shanks

Lingerie. Especially if you walk around him casually while wearing it.

Seeing you put anything on your lips, such as lipstick, gloss, chapstick or balm.

Your confident look when you are certain of something.

When you share a drink with him.

And if you drink alcohol: when you challenge him to a drinking contest.

Watching you change.

And lean over to tie your shoes. Yes he will check out your ass.

Or shower. But not in a sexy way. Just casual nudity.

When you wear his coat or shirt.

If you wear a long necklace that hangs over your chest.

Generally has a thing for big and somewhat ostentatious jewelry.

Having you sit in his lap.

Then he can give you back scratches if you like that.

Ripped stockings.

Loves when you caress the nape of his neck.

Or run your fingers through his hair.

Shoulder and neck kisses.

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multiplicity-positivity · 1 year

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(Image ID:) a blue, green, and white graphic titled “Depersonalization versus Derealization: Exploring the differences in two dissociative symptoms” organized in two columns. The left hand column is titled “Depersonalization” with a stock icon of a head with a scribbled like for the brain. The right hand column is titled “Derealization” with a stock icon of a broken heart.

The statements in the “Depersonalization” column read: “I have trouble recognizing myself, including my reflection and aspects of my identity,” “I feel as though I don’t exist, like I’m invisible, or like someone besides me is controlling my body,” “I feel disconnected from thoughts, memories, and actions, and have a weak sense of identity,” and “I feel numb physically and emotionally when recalling my own past or painful events.”

The statements in the “Derealization” column read: “I have trouble recognizing my surroundings and environment,” “I feel as though the world around me doesn’t exist, including places and people I interact with daily,” “I feel disconnected from reality and struggle to determine what’s real and what isn’t,” and “I feel numb to the world around me, and daily life seems foggy, unreal, and fake.”

Below these columns is the word “sources:” with the following links:

https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/conditions/dissociative-disorders/

https://www.isst-d.org/public-resources-home/fact-sheet-iv-what-are-the-dissociative-disorders/

https://www.dpmanual.com/articles/depersonalization-and-derealization-whats-the-difference/

(END ID)

This infographic was made by us, Halberd (@dreamlandsystem). Feel free to save and share as much as you’d like. Program used: Canva. Image credits: Pixabay. This infographic explores our personal experiences with DPDR, with additional sources for further reading.

#dpdr #depersonalization/derealization disorder #depersonalization #derealization #dissociative disorders #dissociative symptoms #dissociation #dissociative identity disorder #other specified dissociative disorder #osdd did

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floodkiss · 11 months

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Say "NO" to Genocide - Call, email, mail your reps (Canada)

Me and my friend spent some time today writing letters to the House of Commons, plus we have been calling MPs daily. I haven't seen too many resources for this floating around on tumblr, so here's a lengthy guide on how to do this plus some sample scripts! Long post ahead since I think it will be most helpful to dump everything in one spot to reference. On desktop, use CTR F/CMD F to search for the topic -> Phone / Email / Letter Mail / Contacts / Demands / Scripts / Fax

Update 1 - Nov 23: Updated emails with "mailto" hyperlinks, edited demands, added fax section, added scotiabank pres fax number.

On the PHONE / General Tips

Introduce yourself and identify yourself as a constituent by providing your postal code or address.

Ask to speak to the MP directly, but do not be surprised if you must speak to the MP’s staff instead. Staff can help move your issue forward.

Give the reason for your call and explain your concern.

Focus on one or two main concerns per phone call. Do not unload on the MP or their staff with all of your political concerns at one time.

Ask clear and pointed questions that require some explanation.

Ask for a commitment to action.

KEEP IN MIND Tips for Calling MPs:

Tell the MP that this issue will matter to you in the next election.

Avoid revealing party affiliation or sympathies. If you show that your vote is already cast for a certain party, the MP may not have the incentive to respond to your requests.

Be as brief as possible while outlining concerns. Show that you respect their time.

Remain calm and respectful in dialogue. Be willing to work with them.

Follow up: Find out what actions were taken as a result of your call, and respond appropriately.

(Source: CPJ.ca)

CJPME Call Tool - Fill in the form, there will be suggested talking point. The tool will call your phone and then patch you through to your MP. If voicemail, state your concerns in 30 seconds. No address input will default you to call Foreign Affairs Minister Melanie Joly.

Be sure you sign your email with your name and mailing address so they know you are a part of their riding.

You will most likely receive a PR-type response or no response at all, but please still send these. It disrupts operations, and it still contributes to pressuring your MP to act on behalf of your riding.

LETTER MAIL

Mail may be sent postage-free to any member of Parliament at the House of Commons address. You just need to use an MP's full title if they are Cabinet members. Cabinet mebers have "The Honourable" attached to their names.

Postcards are efficient in that they are small pieces of card stock and can be a short message plus demands, no need to get use envelopes.

The Right Honourable Justin Trudeau House of Commons Ottawa, Ontario, Canada K1A 0A6

CONTACTS

Find your MP - ourcommons.ca - Contact the MP of your riding, any of the contacts below, as well as any cabinet members in your city or province.

Prime Minister (613) 992-4211 / [email protected] *FAX: 613-941-6900 /*If faxes are closed at the House of Commons line, try their local offices! (See below under "FAX" for fax guide!)

Deputy Prime Minister - Chrystia Freeland (613) 992-5254 / [email protected] FAX: 416-928-2377

Minister of Foreign Affairs - Mélanie Joly (613) 992-0983 / [email protected] FAX: 613-992-1932

Minister of International Development - Ahmed Hussein (613) 995-0777 / [email protected] FAX: 613-995-0777

Minister of National Defence - Bill Blair (416) 261-8613 / [email protected] FAX: 416-261-5286

Canada-Israel Interparliamentary Group (CAIL) Stéphane Bergeron (*he's not a chair or vice chair of this group, but i want to warn that stephane WILL argue with you, so call after hours if you are scared of confrontation 😭☠️) (450) 922-2562 / [email protected] Anthony House-father (Chair) (514) 283-0171 / [email protected] Randall Garrison (VC) (250) 405-6550 / [email protected] Marty Morantz (VC) (204) 984-6432 / [email protected] The Honourable Ya’ara Saks (VC) (416) 638-3700 / [email protected]

Embassy of Israel (613)567-6450 / FAX: 613-750-7555

DEMANDS

Summarized from resistance groups such as H/mas, H/zbollah, PFLP (Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine), DFLP (Marxist Democratic Front got the Liberation of Palestine), CJPME (Canadians for justice and peace in the middle east), and other anti-war, anti-imperialist, IRL Palestinians.

Canada needs to...

Call an immediate PERMANENT ceasefire to end bloodshed

Send humanitarian aid to Gaza.

Institute embargo on all military exports to Israel

Close the embassies, and sanction Israel diplomatically and economically.

SCRIPTS

Use these as scripts for calling, emailing, and mailing. I suggest adding some of your own sentences and changing the subject lines (for email) so they don't end up in spam.

Example from Canada: Stop Arming Israel - World BEYOND War

As we mourn the thousands of people in Israel and Palestine who have been killed in the past few weeks we refuse to stand by and allow the only true winners in war — the weapons manufacturers — to continue to arm and profit off of it.

Canada exported over $21 million in military goods to Israel in 2022, including over $3 million in bombs, torpedoes, missiles, and other explosives. - 2022 Exports of Military Goods

Weapons companies across Canada are making a fortune off of the carnage in Gaza and the occupation of Palestine.

This is a call to action. It's time to stop letting these weapons companies profit off of the massacre of thousands of Palestinians. Find a location near you, get friends and allies together, and interrupt their business as usual to demand they stop selling arms and military technology to Israel.

Send an urgent message to demand Canada stop arming Israel and push for an immediate ceasefire to your Member of Parliament, the Prime Minister, and the Ministers of Foreign Affairs, International Trade, and Defense.

Dear [recipient's full name goes here], We are witnessing genocidal violence playing out in Gaza right now. Thousands of Palestinians have been killed, nearly half of them children. With a blockade on water, electricity, fuel and food, a quarter of all buildings razed to the ground, and over a million people displaced, UN experts have denounced Israel's actions as crimes against humanity. Meanwhile, weapons companies across Canada are arming -- and making a fortune off of -- the carnage in Gaza and the massacre of thousands of Palestinians by selling weapons and military technology to Israel. I am calling on you to do two things: to take immediate action to institute an arms embargo on Israel and to ensure Canada pushes for de-escalation and a ceasefire in Gaza. Sincerely,

Script Sample 2 from Palestinian Youth Movement

^This will open up a pre-written email in your chosen email app or site. Fill in the recipient line with the emails of MPs you wish to contact.

Script Sample 3 from CJPME's Email Campaign

^Complete the form to send an email to Prime Minister Trudeau, your local MP, and the leaders of the NDP, Convervatives and Greens. Canada must OPPOSE A SECOND NAKBA and dispossession of the Palestinians in Gaza by pushing for a ceasefire.

Script Sample 3 for mail:

(a mix of mine and a friend's)

I am writing to ask you to take immediate action to stop the genocide Israel is committing against Palestinians in Gaza as well as the onslaught of those in West Bank.

There is blockade on food, water, electricity, fuel, and the use of internationally banned white phosphorus to exterminate Palestinians. Aid is not able to enter Gaza because of this blockade. UN experts have named Israel’s actions as genocide citing numerous war crimes they continually commit.

While over 10k civilians have been martyr’d (4.2k of which are children), Canada has not even been able to NAME such crimes as genocide or call for an official ceasefire. This is not enough.

Canada needs to:

Call an immediate ceasefire to end bloodshed

Send humanitarian aid to Gaza.

Institute embargo on all military exports to Israel

Close the embassies, and sanction Israel diplomatically and economically.

FAX (NEW!)

Using faxzero.com is simple, just follow up the steps on the website. No fax machine required! Tell officials your demands and customize your letter by noting their complicity based on their role as a politician or gov official. Or keep it brief and simple, in large legible letters.

Demands could include:

That you are a “Canadian” constituent That you are demanding an IMMEDIATE AND PERMANENT CEASEFIRE IN GAZA; That you demand a total withdrawal of financial (taxpayer) and commercial support and arms for continued occupation in Israel’s 70+ year occupation in Palestine; That it is shameful that [X] is choosing not to speak up for the deaths of more than 11,000 Palestinians, half of whom are children and thousands of others displaced; That Palestinians like all people, deserve life, dignity and justice; That Israel is breaking multiple international laws daily and Canada MUST meet its international commitment to promote and defend human rights under the Geneva Convention; That not putting these actions in place will harm constituents and undo acts of reconciliation with Indigenous peoples and other marginalized communities in Canada by not protecting the Indigenous peoples of Palestine; That unless there is concrete and everlasting action taken place, that there will be no peace until Palestine is free, and subsequently that you will not be voting for them (if applicable) in the next election.

Sign off with your name, address and postal code (if applicable, furthering that you are a resident on the stolen Indigenous lands otherwise known as “Canada”) Extended fax list: Scott thomson (president of scotiabank) - 416-866-5929 joe biden / whitehouse - 202-456-2461

(source: @/harlo.gif on IG)

#canadian politics #palestine #canada #canada stop arming israel

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paranoia-art · 5 months

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╭┈◦•◦❥•◦ ZenBrush

╭┈◦•◦❥•◦ Huion Sketch

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Apr/14/2024

154 notes · View notes

luza-wayne · 6 months

Text

why people bother with love.

sawamura daichi x reader

wc: 9.2k

this is the longest fic that i've ever written, omg. i love daichi sm<33

also the story is inspired by taylor swift's song 'mine'! i was listening to it while on shuffle playlist and thought it was so good.

a happy and lovely family.

it's the farthest from what your family was.

all your parents did was fight at every little thing that can be talked through.

it was also the reason why you and your siblings are not close with each other. they hide or run away whenever they're fighting, which means, always.

but, they did tell you once.

“they were so deeply in love with each other in the past.”

so, just in the past?

i don't understand.

“then, you shouldn't have spent it on useless things!”

your father's voice made your ears ring. it's in the middle of the night.

they're fighting again.

this is supposed to be a day for me. i just graduated from elementary school today.

“useless?! you call that useless?!” your mother shouted back.

you decided to get off of the bed and silently walk to where the voices are coming from, the kitchen.

“of course, it is!” your father replied.

“our daughter just graduated and you're saying that buying her a small gift is useless?!” your mother asked.

i knew it. it's about that.

you peeked from the opening in the living room which was connected to the kitchen.

“just tell her ‘congratulations!’ or anything! why bother spending money?! we're not rich!” your father rebutted.

“are you hearing yourself right now, huh?” your mother snickered. “what are you even mad about? it's not even over ¥500?”

“you could've used that ¥500 for something more important! like food stocks or bills!”

“her, graduating is important! don’t you dare not acknowledge your daughter’s milestone!”

maybe i should just give them back a ¥500 that i saved from my daily allowance? would that stop them from fighting?

“arhg! you and your obtuse actions!” your father slammed the counter with his balled fist.

“what?! you're one to talk! that stupid "friend" of yours who always borrows money from you! where is he now, huh? out there partying and spending the money you lent him! what did he say? "i'll give it back tomorrow!" i never once saw him return the money he borrows, yet you keep on giving and giving him! what are you, a bank?!” your mother snapped.

“shut up!” your father shouted and clicked his tongue. “you always bring that up! you're always like that! i'm tired of you already!”

“guess who's tired of you too?” your mother crossed her arms and stared at your father blankly.

“is that so? then i'm leaving and never going back here!” your father had enough and walked out.

he met your eyes and was surprised for a bit, but he continued walking to the front door.

you looked at your mother.

she still had her arms crossed above her chest, but she clenched her hands tightly and was biting on her lower lip.

“mom, are you not going to run after dad?” you stepped out from hiding.

your mother flinched, but she quickly realized that you must've heard the whole conversation already.

“why would i? it was his decision to leave! i don't care about him anymore! i'm glad i finally got tired of his ass!” she said and went to get water.

what?

you say that, but why do you look so hurt?

“your hands are quivering, mom.”

as your eyebrows furrowed, you heard the engine starting. you look at the door's direction and run towards it. when you stepped out, you saw your father just hopped on his mini truck.

he saw you running to him. he rolled his window down.

“dad, when are you coming back?” you asked him.

he just smiled achingly at you.

“sorry.” he muttered. you, confused, tilted your

“don't worry, i'd still be there for you, siblings.” he shortly answered.

“what about mom?” you questioned.

“i don't care anymore. i can't bring myself to love her anymore. sorry.” he said and grabbed the steering wheel tightly. he then said goodbye and drove off.

i don't understand.

“they were so deeply in love with each other in the past.”

did their love for each other fade away?

i really don't understand…

love…

“why does everyone bother with it if it never lasts?”

why do we need to fall in love, just to experience the anguish of losing the feeling of it?

•••

“hurry! hurry! their match is already starting!” your friend pulls your hand, as you follow her lead.

“okay, okay.” you answered with no enthusiasm.

what am i going to do there anyways? i don't even know the rules in volleyball.

“why are we watching a boys volleyball game in the first place?” you asked her.

“it's our school's team! they can represent miyagi in the spring high tournament, if they win against the team they're playing today.” she said,

okay, still didn't anyways why we should be here.

when you two reached the bleachers, your other classmates waved at you and pointed at the seat they reserved for you both.

the first set just finished when you arrived. you just used the cheering megaphone they handed you and just created some noise as the players walked on the court.

“kageyama-sama, do your best!” you heard your friend scream her heart out.

that answers my question. also, what do you mean, "-sama"? you're older than him, right?

you sighed and just continued cheering.

the umpire blew the whistle and signaled that the second set was starting. you watched as a guy with bowl-cut from the opposing team serves.

your eyes widened a bit seeing how hard he serves, you were so sure no one could receive it.

but, the guy was there to break your thoughts.

he easily receives it, making your eyes widened even more.

as soon as he received it, they ran towards the net and he hit the ball over the other team, earning them the first point of the set.

wow.

your mouth hangs open.

“h-hey,” you called for your friend's attention. “who was that?”

“who? the one who sets?! that's kageyama! he's a firs—”

“no, the one who hits the ball.” you immediately stopped her.

“oh, that's the captain, sawamura daichi, from class 4. i think he's friends with sugawara too.” she answered shortly, now that the topic is not kageyama anymore.

number 1… that means he's the captain, right?

the match continued and they won the set. they lost the third, but won the fourth.

you were hanging on your seat as the set, supposed to be just 15, goes over to 20 and you cling to your friend tightly as the final whistle was heard and karasuno was declared the winner.

“wah! kageyama-sama, congratulations!” your friend bawled out.

“he's amazing too, right?” you said as you clapped, seeing sawamura receive the trophy.

“of course! he's kageyama-sama's teammate, after all!” she said, still dragging kageyama to the conversation.

when it was time to move out, your friend said she needed to go to the toilet, so you went there with her.

as you two passed the entrance to the gym floor, you saw the black uniforms standing there.

oh, they're here.

“sugawara!” your friend suddenly shouted, calling for your classmates' attention. almost all of them looked in your direction. “congratulations!” she said,

“oh! thanks!” sugawara replied, waving his hand in the air with a big smile.

you thought you might as well congratulate your classmate.

“congratulations, sugawara.” you said, not as loud as your friend's voice, but enough for him to hear.

“ah! (y/n), thanks!” he thanked you.

you two then bowed to them and continued to go to the bathroom, all while your friend celebrated that he got kageyama's attention earlier too.

“okay, i got it already. just go and hurry up.” you shut her up when you reached the comfort room.

you just walked to a close bench to the bathroom and took a seat, waiting patiently for your friend to finish.

“hey,” you heard a voice say.

you're not sure whether they're talking to you or not, but you looked up at where it came from.

“you're…” you started and stood on your feet. “sawamura, right?”

“uh, yeah. i'm sawamura.” he said as he reached for his nape and rubbed it with his palms awkwardly.

“you were so awesome in the game earlier. congrats.” you told him and smiled.

“thanks. i actually think i look unsightly during the game, especially when i'm just running and moving on fumes.” he replied sheepishly.

“well, the fact that you think that and yet you still do it just shows how passionate you are about winning.” you uttered. “still, don't worry. you look cool.” you reassured him.

“really? that's a relief.” he said and sighs relievedly.

there was a few seconds of silence after that and you just stared at each other.

“um… why did you… uhm, approach me?” you asked.

he suddenly gets a bit of tint pink shade on his cheeks, that can be easily missed if you were not looking carefully. maybe the reason, you noticed it also was the fact that his bruised on his left cheeks got your attention.

“well, you see… we won against shiratorizawa.” he started and you hummed. “so, we're already qualified for the spring high, i was just wondering if you'll be watching there too.” he asked.

“why? is my presence needed there?” you confusedly asked, making him chortle.

“for me, it definitely does, haha.” he answered, straightforwardly.

it skipped a beat. my heart just did.

i know these feelings very well. it's the feeling i swore not to follow.

i know where these feelings would bring me to.

“i see. i'll look forward to it then.”

i should've declined back then.

•••

“ever since you moved here, it never got quiet here anymore!”

your old woman neighbor is once again shouting in front of your house.

she's always there and she always just does it whenever sawamura is at work or out for something. it was easy to know since she knows he's a police officer and the police car is not in the parking lot.

you continued to bite your lower lip.

trying to stop yourself from shouting back at the old woman was harder than you thought.

the neighbors said she has a mental disorder, but still her voice. her voice can easily break a plate or two.

normally, you would just ignore her until she leaves, but today you're not like those days. your menstruation started this morning, and the blood got onto the sheets, so you had changed it.

moving around irritates you, but you had no choice but to do the chores, before your husband arrives, since it's just you two in the house and you're off to work today.

speaking of your husband, you looked at the clock and saw the time.

‘where are you?’ ‘your shift should've finished a while ago.’ ‘can you go home already?’

you stared at your phone and waited for him to reply, but he didn't. you just stood up and went to the kitchen.

ah, she left. you thought as you managed to peek outside the window while you walked to the kitchen.

thank goodness, finally.

“guess, i should reheat this.” you muttered to yourself and sighed.

you placed the dinner you cooked, inside the microwave. as you wait for it, you remembered that you haven't looked at the mail today yet.

you hurriedly went outside and opened the mailbox.

“huh?” you were surprised to see the mails filled with bills that needed to be paid.

you groaned as you held the envelopes in hand.

it's the same envelope you receive every month, but somehow these envelopes are more irritating to you right now.

you just closed the mailbox and went inside. you one by one looked through the mail, while you walked back to the kitchen.

and every time you open one, your mood gets worse and worse.

“huh?! why is it so expensive?!” you shouted at the bill you're holding.

we need to spend our money more wisely, even if we're both working.

*ping*

you heard the microwave's sound go off. you immediately took it out forgetting to put on a mitt or even a pot holder.

“ouch!” you screamed. you hurriedly went to the sink and ran the water on it. “damn, what am i doing?”

“i'm home.” sawamura announced as soon as he stepped in.

he's home?!

“argh! wait–” you speed walked to the main door and saw your husband. “welc–”

you stopped mid-sentence when you saw what he's holding.

“uh, i saw a friend of mine while on my way home, that's why i was late, so i thought i should get you something.” he said and extended his arms, a bouquet of flowers in his hands.

you accepted it, staring at it with a forced smile.

“don't like it?” he asked as he kissed your temple and walked to the living room.

you followed him, still looking at the flowers.

“no… it's just—” you sighed. “you didn't have to buy something this expensive…” you muttered.

“so, you don't like it?” he asked as he took off his uniform.

“no, it's not like that. i'm saying you shouldn't have spent the money on something useless—” you said, but decided to just cut yourself off.

you sighed. “thank you, dai.” walking up to him to hug him.

he returned the embrace, but he knew something was wrong.

we could’ve used the money to pay off our bills instead. you thought as you let go from the hug.

sawamura, puzzled, still decided to just give you a bit of space and not to pry yet. he went to take a short shower, while you prepared the table.

while waiting for him to join you, you looked at the envelopes you were just looking at earlier. your eyes then went back to the bouquet that’s now sitting on the center table in the living room.

you breathed deeply.

am i getting ungrateful for not appreciating his effort on buying that?

you got on your feet and went to get it.

staring at it, you finally realized how pretty it was. also, it’s your favorite flower.

you can’t remember when was the last time you mentioned to him what your favorite flower was.

was it when we were on our first date?

you chuckled.

“that guy really knows how to put butterflies in my stomach.”

suddenly, you felt two cold arms wrapped around your waist. you felt him snuggle his nose on your nook of neck.

“dai, stop it. i'm reeking of sweat.” you chortled as you felt a bit tickled by his now growing stubble.

he buried his nose deeper and even inhaled your scent like a man who just regained his sense of smell.

“smells like a pheromone for me.” he replied and lifted you up.

hooking his arms behind your knees and walking to the table. he sat you down on the chair and took a seat adjacent to yours.

as he was about to scoop rice for both of you, you reached out to his cheeks and gave him a peck. he was taken aback, but then smiled at you. he held your hand on his cheeks and brought it to his lips, kissing the back of it.

“thank you for the flowers, dai.” you told him.

“anything for you, babe.” he answered.

maybe i was just thinking a bit too much about our bills. i should just appreciate that he got me these flowers.

…

“mrs. sawamura, please redo this.” your team leader sternly said.

you looked up from your desk and met with an eyes burning and a face that’s barely containing their anger.

“yes?” you asked while your hand was holding the lunch you were about to eat at the canteen.

“there are a lot of inaccurate reports and miscalculated estimates. what are you even doing? do you want our team to lose this project because of you?” she added and slammed the folder on your desk.

“but—” none of those are my jobs though.

i might probably have to add this to my piles of to-do work.

she was about to walk away, when she suddenly looked back.

“and i want them done today.” she said lastly, before walking back to her posts and leaving you with wide eyes.

all of this by today?!

“there’s no way i can finish this today.” you whispered and slumped your back to the chair.

i might need to stay for over time.

as you set your lunch box down on your desk, your phone vibrated. you pulled it out of your vest’s pocket and saw a message notification from your younger sister, who’s in college.

- we’re running out of mom’s medication. - she’s always staring and thinking about a lot of things, i’m afraid it might turn into depression. - and brother’s med maintenance too. - it’ll only last until tomorrow. - we need extra money, but i already used my income from my part-time job to pay off the debts when i borrowed money from my friend to pay for my tuition. she said she badly needed the money. -if you have extra money, can you send us some for your mother and brother? - i’ll try asking someone too.

you let out a frustrated sigh. you grit your teeth and lower your head.

just how bad will this day get?

you repositioned your body. taking deep breaths. you picked up your phone again and replied to your sister.

- no, it’s fine. i have some extra here. i received a bonus yesterday. i’ll send it to you and pay for the remaining balance on your tuition too. don’t forget their meds. let me know how much all in total. thanks for always looking out for them. take care there.

you put down your phone and covered your face with your hands.

well, there goes my bonus. i still haven’t paid for the other bills that i’m supposed to pay for.

“(y/n), you okay?” your workmate asked.

you just nodded and told him you’re okay.

i need to save money.

…

hours have passed since your supposed time to go home, but here you are redoing the whole project that wasn’t even your doing, yet forced to redo so.

“this… is wrong. who the hell put it here?” you said to yourself and immediately fixed it.

thankfully, you are already almost done with it. just a bit more and you can already give it to your team leader. she seemed to stay late too and was working on another project.

that doesn’t mean she should have me revise these mistakes when i wasn't even the one who did it.

“and… there! all done!” you raised your arms in the air and stretched your back.

“finally!” you expressed slumping your body to the chair with relief.

you immediately went to pass it to your leader. she didn’t even bother looking up at you and just said a monotone of “good work, you can go home now.” but, you could care less at this moment, you just want to get it over with and go home and take a bath and sleep.

as you were arranging your belongings, you remembered that you turned your phone off, in order to concentrate more.

you slid your bag on your shoulder and walked to the elevator. you waited for the phone to turn on. you’re the only one inside, so your mind wandered off while waiting to reach the ground floor and for your phone.

should i get a part time job too? ever since my brother got caught up in a motorcycle accident, it feels like money has been slipping out the moment i got them on my hands.

you heard a ping and the door finally opened, the same time as your phone turned on too. while walking to the door, your notifications got bombed with messages from your husband.

…

- can’t wait to have dinner with you <3 - i think i might arrive a bit earlier than our call time - the chief will let us out early today - i’ll be waiting for you, but you don’t have to rush, okay? - are you on ‘do not disturb’ mode? - okay, you might be busy right now - good luck on your work, i love you

- i just got out, i’ll be passing by the house for a moment to change the car and maybe take a quick shower too - still no reply? :( - don’t overwork yourself too much please - i’ll be driving so i might not see your reply - i love you

- i’m on my way to the resto - i’m so excited haha - i’ll be waiting there for you - i’ll be sure to drive safely, because that’s what you always say when i say i’m about to drive - see you there, i love you

- i’m here already, but no need to rush - i’m just early by half an hour - just let me know if you’re seeing these messages - be safe on your way here, i love you

- hey, it’s been two hours already - are you still tied up with your work? - let me know if i should wait for you or pick you up at your work - i can still wait for you though - please reply, babe - i’m getting a bit worried now - reply to me please, i love you

- i just contacted your colleague - he told me you’re staying overtime to finish some things, but couldn’t you tell me sooner? - i’m still waiting here for about four hours now - i’m going home now - at least reply to me once you’ve seen this

…

oh shit, oh shit, oh shit! i completely forgot about our dinner!

you hurriedly ran to call a taxi, knowing that the train was about to close by the time.

i knew something important slipped my mind earlier! i can’t believe it was the date with my husband!

you told the driver the destination of your travel, while also asking him if he can make it so you will arrive faster there. of course, he said he can’t drive recklessly, but he’ll try to drive faster.

while the taxi driver did his job, you tried to reply to your daichi. you explained that you had your phone off, that's why you didn’t receive his messages. the thing is, your messages are going through but he’s not responding to your message.

gosh, i think he’s really mad. what should i do when i get home? we can just have another dinner. ugh, it’s too pricey. you sighed.

after a few minutes, the taxi finally arrived at the street of your house. you told him it’s okay to drop you off here and paid him. while walking to your house, your stomach churns with anxiety as you might find daichi mad.

as you reached your gated house, you searched for your keys only for you to realize that you didn’t bring it with you when you left the house. you contemplated whether to call daichi and have him open the gate for you or just jump over the gate.

while thinking, you suddenly heard the clicking sounds of the gate being opened. you turn around to see your husband in his shorts and t-shirt. he’s not in his night wear yet, so he must’ve been doing some work in his office, just like what he usually does when he gets some free time after eating dinner, though it usually doesn't take this long for him to do those works.

“o-oh, you’re still awake? i didn’t wake you up, right?” you asked, trying not to make it awkward.

“no.” he flatly said.

he finally opened the gate and then waited for you to step inside, without uttering another word. you walked to the front door and opened it, going inside. you left the door open for him.

you set your coat on the rack and followed daichi with your eyes as he closed the front door and walked past you after throwing the keys in the bowl. you also saw your keys there.

i knew it he’s mad.

you walked to the living room to see him opening the television and munching on some chips. seeing this, you felt your stomach grumble. you went to the kitchen and found a bowl of some hot miso soup. your stomach felt even hungrier.

but, i need to talk to dai. you closed your eyes and accepted your hunger later.

you were about to walk to where daichi was when he suddenly stood up and went to the bathroom. he also took a towel, so it seems like he’ll take a shower.

guess, i should eat first then.

…

after eating and washing the dishes, since it’s only the ones you eat with anyways, you went to change your clothes hurriedly, in case daichi finishes his shower already.

when you went back to the living room, there you saw him sitting on the couch, eyes glued to the television.

you walked to him and called his name.

“dai.” he didn’t look at you.

“dai. i forgot about our dinner.” you said and took a seat next to him, he looked at you.

i should just explain it to him and get this over with.

“our team leader was being a little bitchy earlier and gave me work i’m not even supposed to do, so i turned off my phone—” you were telling him about what happened earlier, when he suddenly cut you off.

“is it that hard to remember to tell me that you’re taking an overtime?” he stated. staring at you with a straight face.

“huh?” you asked, deflecting his straightforwardness.

“i’m pissed off that you made me wait for about four hours, but i’m more pissed about the fact that you can’t even tell me that you’re having overtime.” he uttered.

it’s like something just snapped in your mind. you know you’re the one who should apologize for forgetting about your date and even making him wait. but, it must’ve been the awful day that you had that’s getting the best of you right now.

“why is it such a big thing to tell you about that?” you asked him with a stress on the word ‘big thing’.

he furrowed your brows and was taken aback by your question. did you really just ask him why is that a big thing?

he stood up and was still not breaking eye contact with you.

“maybe it’s because i’m your husband, (y/n).” he answered back, now emphasizing his words. “of course, i need to know because i get worried why you aren’t back yet when your working hours are already done.”

you raised your eyebrow.

“if you were that worried, then you should’ve come to my workplace and checked up on me.” you said and then stood up too, facing him.

“i was about to, when your co-worker replied to me and said you already have taken an overtime and possibly forgotten about our reservation!” he rebutted, his voice getting louder.

“then it's good timing! that was a waste of money anyways, we can always just eat somewhere cheap!” you shouted back.

“it’s you who wanted to eat there!” he pointed at you.

“i never said that! it’s you who wanted to take me there!” you told him and took a step forward.

“why are you always pushing the blame onto someone else whenever you're up against a corner?!” he gritted through his teeth.

“huh?! when did i ever do that—” you were about to talk when he talked over you.

and it was when you realized this is going like what happened with your parents.

“you never owe up to your mistakes, i always try to understand you because i love you, but (y/n), i’m a human too! i have a limit!” he started.

“wha—” before you could even finish, he added something that breaks your heart.

“i’m tired of you always being like that!” he said and stormed off to the bedroom.

you stood there in the middle of the living room speechless.

your world seems to be spinning yet you’re not paying attention to it, you're more focused on the heavy feeling on your chest. it’s so heavy, it feels like your heart has fallen to your stomach and now you can feel the churning of it too.

your legs felt wobbly, you had no choice but to sit back down on the couch. your hand found its way to your chest.

it hurts here.

your eyesight started becoming watery.

“you’re always like that! i’m tired of you already!” “guess who’s tired of you too?” “is that so? then i’m leaving and never going back here!”

no! stop, stop, stop, stop!

don’t think about what happened to mom and dad!

“then i’m leaving and never going back here!”

stop! please!

you know daichi won’t leave you, right?!

he won’t leave you!

he won’t.

…right?

i just have to apologize—

“they were so deeply in love with each other in the past.”

no…

i still love daichi!

stop thinking like that!

with all these thoughts, you didn’t even realize how much you’re crying, but somehow not making any sounds. your body is still adapted to your childhood habit of immediately covering your mouth and nose when crying in order not to let anyone hear it.

it’s a habit that started the night you realized that you’re the reason why your parents have broken off. if you didn’t ask your mother for a gift that day, then there might be a chance that your family is still together.

your body slid and now you’re lying on the couch sideways, still covering your mouth and nose.

i still love daichi.

but, daichi’s tired of me already.

i knew love never lasts, but i thought it might be different with daichi. i was too naive to think love would treat me differently than my parents.

everything comes and goes.

in the end, it was a cycle.

not the love, but what happened with my parents’ love story and mine.

it will never last. love is.

…

waiting for a bit until you stopped crying, you picked up your coat again and put it on. you were about to take your keys, but realized you don’t need it anymore. before leaving, you remembered one thing. you walked back to the living room and took off your ring, setting it down on the table, all while holding back your tears again.

daichi’s the type to sleep his anger until he calmed down, so you didn’t have to think that he might pop out suddenly and ask you where are you going.

you have already booked a taxi to take you somewhere that might not be a safe haven for you, but still has a deep hold to you.

“can you take me here?” you said to the driver and he said he can and then quietly drove you there.

you turned your phone off to avoid someone calling you. you slept on your way there and when you felt the car stop for a bit too long, you immediately opened your eyes. a bittersweet smile appeared on your face as you stared at the house from the window.

you thanked the driver and hopped out of the taxi. you stood in front of the house unlighted because it’s already midnight, though to you it looked more gloomy rather than creepy.

one of the rooms is still with lights on, you grabbed your phone and messaged your sister. a few moments later, she was out of the house, wearing her pajamas, surprised to find her sister out of the house in the middle of the night.

as much as how surprised she was, she knew it was out of ordinary for you to show up in front of the house on a random day. she knew you had your reasons, but never forced you to tell her about it. it’s not like you’ll travel for about three hours just to visit them, just because you thought about it, what’s more it’s in the middle of the night.

she helped you get your room ready, she can see from your eyes that you needed to rest your body and mind. when it was already done, you thanked her and encouraged her about the plates she’s finishing, that's why she’s staying up late.

you laid on your bed, the same bed that has been with you with everything. it is nostalgic to think about the memories, but you can’t help but think about those times where the family is still complete and somehow you are acting like a real family.

“i’m back. you’re seeing another pathetic side of me.” you muttered to yourself, referring to the bed and realized that maybe it’s the whole room too.

you turned your eyes to the pictures stuck on your walls. your lips quivered again as you stare at the picture you put up in the past of you and daichi when you had an aquarium date.

it’s a picture of you two kissing that was perfectly photobombed by a large stingray, that made both of you look like you had wings.

“why do humans fall in love? it hurts my heart, yet i can’t stop loving the man i married.” you uttered as a tear fell out of your eyes.

you were about to close your eyes, when suddenly you heard a knock on your door. you looked up and stared at it, thinking it could be your imagination. again, three knocks came. you immediately went to get whoever it was. did your little sister forget something? or did you?

opening the door, you were greeted by your mother in a wheelchair. smiling up at you.

“i knew it. you came home, i see.” she said, still smiling affectionately at you.

“mom, why are you still awake?” you asked, kneeling in front of her. you held her hand and returned the smile.

“i was asleep, but i woke up when i heard your bedroom’s door being opened.” she explained and tapped you, asking you to stand up.

“huh? ah…” you were puzzled by what she said, but then remembered it.

“your door lets out a peculiar sound every time it opens and closes, right?” she chuckled and pointed at your balcony.

you went behind her and pushed the wheelchair to your balcony, the breeze was chilly, so you went to your dresser and looked for something thick to cover your frail mother’s body. you came back with a jacket, and wrapped it over her shoulders while she was staring at the star-filled sky.

“it’s beautiful.” she spoke.

you looked up and truthfully, it was beautiful but you were not in the mood to admire them. you just answered her with a simple, “yeah.”

for a moment, it was quiet. the only sounds you’re hearing are the sound of the wind brushing against the trees and leaves and the sound of the crickets.

it was quite, you thought it would be okay to just stay like this, but you know somewhere someone would speak up. it was your mother who did.

“did something happen at your house?” she finally asked the same question your little sister wanted to ask but decided not to.

you tried to stay quiet, but you were aware you have to, sooner or later, need to tell them the reason rather than keeping them in the dark.

and yet, you can’t find the courage to speak.

your mother smiled.

again, it was quiet.

for a few minutes, it stayed quiet. actually, you think it might actually go until half an hour. half an hour of letting the noises of nature fill both of your ears, half an hour of feeling the cold blow of the midnight wind on your skin.

you looked down at your mother and noticed that she’s just staring at something far. it was like her mind was occupied by something.

“mom,” you called, she answered you by humming, “what are you thinking about?”

“i’m thinking about your father.” she said lightly.

you were surprised. the topic about your father was like a forbidden one, you and your siblings never talked about your father when in presence of your mother, yet she just told you that he’s running in her mind right now.

i thought she hated him.

“why?” you asked.

she smiled weakly.

“i’m thinking that if i followed him back then, maybe i would be happy right now.” your eyes widened.

she still remember that? and… she regrets not running after him? but, he’s…

“i thought you said you didn’t love him anymore?”

she chuckled.

“i thought so too.”

…

it’s saturday and almost four o'clock in the morning, daichi was woken up by his alarm clock, he forgot to turn off before sleeping. it was already weird, because usually he never hears it. it was you who got woken up by it first and then turned it off. after that, you’ll be nudging him and even getting on top of him with your whole body to wake him up.

his body feels so tired. he stretched his arms out, only to feel the cold sheet next to him. he sprung up on his ass.

“where is—”

he shut his eyes tight when he remembered what happened last night.

“damn it. i decided to sleep again while i’m mad. i should stop doing that. she doesn't like it either.” he muttered as he got off the bed and stretched out his body.

he went outside the room to get water and find you. he searched the living room with his eyes, but he didn’t see you, he walked to the kitchen and you weren’t there either.

maybe in the bathroom? he thought and his feet dragged him there.

no. you weren’t there.

at this point, he was ignoring the thumping sounds of his heart. there’s no way you did what he’s thinking… right?

he went outside, even though he knows himself it’s ridiculous, to see you watering the plants. but, still there’s no sign of you.

he went back inside and searched every room, but still no one jumped out and said that you were just playing hide-and-seek with a just-woken-up him.

where were you?

he went to sit on the couch. short and fast breaths taking over his lungs.

please just tell me you went out to jog. or that you went to shop this early in the morning. anything that could be outrageous to do at this time you can do it and he wouldn’t even laugh. just show up before his eyes and calm down his heart getting scared minute by minute that he might’ve ruined everything last night.

“where are you, baby? please, just this once let it be a joke.” his said with a shaking voice.

he looked down and finally saw it. the ring you left, before you went and left the house.

daichi laughed.

“now, if this is a nightmare, i fucking hate it, haha.” he laughed as he picked it up with trembling fingers.

it wasn’t happening. if he closes his eyes and opens it again, he’ll find you sleeping soundly beside him.

but it didn’t.

he clutched the ring in his palms as he wobbly stood up and went to the bedroom to get his phone. maybe if he calls you and apologizes, he can fix this relationship.

but, it wasn’t going through.

“did she block me already? please don’t. i’ll apologize for everything i did and said. just don’t leave me.” he muttered, shaking voice and tears finally escaping his eyes.

he kissed the ring, before deciding to get on his feet.

he’s not letting this relationship end, if he had to eat dirt for you to forgive him, he’ll go out of his way to search for the dirtiest mud and eat it for you.

he checked the closet. his line of work will become handy to him, but he didn’t think that it’ll be useful in this way. you didn’t take any clothes with you. so, there’s a high chance that you’ll go somewhere you have a stock of clothes with them. but, the friend you’re always staying over whenever you have a girl’s night, is out of town right now and the other is attending a party just like what you’ve told him.

as much as he doesn't want to say it, he knows that you’re trying to save money, so you probably won’t stay at a hotel.

he picked up his jacket, phone and wallet.

he knows the only place where you could be.

…

“you thought so too?” you repeated.

“i thought i was tired of him, that i didn’t love him anymore.” she said, “but, i was wrong.” she added.

how can you love someone who hurt you just by thinking about them?

she looked up at you and smiled.

“i realized, i was not tired of loving him.” she looked forward again. “rather, i was tired of our fights. i was tired of always exchanging shouts with him, but i never stopped loving him. ever since that night, never a day passed that i haven’t thought about how i should’ve run after him and told him not to leave me, us.”

your lips quiver while listening. you always made sure not to talk about your father thinking that your mother would hate it, not knowing that everyday she reminisces about their relationship.

again, she looked up at you, but now with a warmer and larger smile.

“so, i thought once i get better, i’ll try and win your father back, even if it took too many years, haha.” she happily said, before looking back in front.

you weren’t able to contain it anymore, you shed a tear for your mother. you bend down and hug her from behind. she was startled when you suddenly wrapped your arms around her, but still caressed her daughter’s head, just like how she used to whenever she cries in her arms. you were happy to see your mother’s genuine smile, a smile that isn’t forced, a smile that isn’t there to show that she’s okay, so you don’t have to worry. you were happy, but you can’t help but cry.

knowing damn well that your father has already married someone else and is having his third child.

you know that and yet, you can’t tell her that. you don’t want to. not when she just finds inspiration to be well again.

but, you didn’t expect to hear what she said next.

“your father… he already found someone else, didn’t he?” she suddenly said that it made you freeze.

you felt wet drops on your arms.

“i-i— he—” you wanted to lie, but can’t bring another heartbreak to your mother by lying.

“i know, because you’re my child.” she sobbed and tears fell out of her eyes like waterfalls. “and i know, because that’s just the man i knew and loved.”

you went in front of her and hugged her by her waist, bawling like a little child.

“sorry, sorry, sorry, mom… it was my fault… i’ve always known it was because of me… if i didn’t ask you for a gift, maybe he would still be with us… mom, i’m sorry… because of me… i’m sorry… i’m sorry… i’m sorry… please, forgive me…” you cried and cried, begging your mother for forgiveness.

your mother who is also crying, but still manages to wipe your tears, nods her head with everything you say to let you know she’s listening.

you kept on apologizing to her and she listened to everything. when you ran out of breath, she took this chance to calm you down.

“(y/n), look at me.” she said as she cupped your cheeks, you looked at her with a messy face and probably snot coming out of your nose. “never have i ever thought that it was your fault. your small gift was not the reason we ended the relationship. i didn’t know that you’ve always carried the guilt on your back thinking that it was your fault. i’m sorry for never noticing.” she affirmed.

“it was not your fault, (y/n).”

this made you teary again.

“mom… thank you…” you cried to her as you held her hands that were on your cheeks. closing your eyes to feel the warmth of her palms in the coldness of the breeze.

“with that said, (y/n)...” she called. you opened your eyes and saw another of her real smiles.

“don’t make the same mistake as me.”

it was a short sentence, yet it rang your ears so loud, you can’t hear anything else except that.

your lips showed a smile, a quivering and forced smile. your tears never stopped dropping, actually your eyes produced more.

“i’m sorry, mom. but i think i already did.” you cried, resting your head on her thighs. “it wasn’t your mistake that i’ve committed, but dad’s.” you added.

“i ran away.” you hiccuped, “i thought everything would be the same, so i ran away. i was scared to face it.”

your mother made you raise your head. your eyes are red from crying so much and yet you felt like you haven’t let everything out. your chest still feels heavy. you want to cry everything out, but thoughts fill in double with every tear that escapes your eye. you just want to cry it out, but the longer you cry, the more it hurts.

“mom, what should i do?” you asked her, looking up at her. sniffing and catching your breath.

“i…” you stopped to inhale. “i love daichi, but i’m scared. what if it's all temporary. what if our love fades?”

“it was my fault. it’s always been my fault.” you wiped your eyes with your hands, only to be replaced by another one. “i… i don’t want to leave him, mom…”

“dear, calm down.” your mother squished your cheeks. “i’m sure you realize that whatever you did to your husband was wrong, but you don’t have to worry.” she said, making you confused.

“i was the one who ran away… what if he didn’t run after me?” you asked.

“then you’ll be the one who needs to go back to him. you need to talk it out.” she ran her hands on your hair. “you wouldn’t want to turn out like me, right?” she muttered, giving you a relieved smile.

she knows that you already know what to do and that no matter what happens, deep inside you, you didn’t want to be something you saw happen to her and your father. she must’ve been subconsciously aware that you were afraid to fall in love. she saw when you looked at others with partners, not with an envious eyes, but rather a confused one.

she realized just now, that she might have been the reason why you think like that. with what turned out to be your mother and father’s relationship, maybe it’s understandable why you thought love fades along with the relationship. but, you’re wrong. after all, look at her. she will always love the man that was with her for most of her happiest moments. she’ll never stop loving him.

but, she knows it’s different for the both of you.

because, she saw something in daichi that your father has never done and never will. she knew from the day you introduced him to her.

your father never looked at her the same way daichi looked at you whenever you’re not looking.

so, she knows. she knows it won’t turn as tragic as her story.

when she realized, you have already calmed down. you’re still sniffing and wiping your tear stains, but you’ve controlled it.

“let’s go. it’s getting late and you haven’t slept yet.” she tapped your back. you could only reply with a nod.

you stood up and helped your mother turn her wheelchair around. you helped her get to her bedroom, but before walking back to your room, you thanked her.

“thank you, mom.” you said. she looked at you and smiled. “thank you for being the best.” you kissed her on her forehead and said good nights to each other.

you went back to your room and laid on the bed. you reached for your phone. your fingers fiddled whether to turn it on or not.

in the end, you chose not to.

you know what to do right now, but needed more courage to commence it.

“i should get some sleep first.” you muttered, your body finally processing the amount of tiredness your body felt yesterday and today.

i’m going back to daichi. i don’t want to lose him.

…

the sun was up and it was hitting your eyelid. you were too tired and sleepy, you forgot to lay out the blinds.

you were about to turn your body to the side, when something was holding you by your waist. you were still feeling groggy, but you paid no attention to it. but, then you remembered you’re in your room, not at your house, but your mother’s house.

you swung your head sideways and saw daichi sleeping next to you. your mouth was wide open and was surprised.

how did he get here this early in the morning?

you stared at his handsome face that was wrinkled by his furrowed brows. you wanted to laugh, because that was his face every time he dreams about a weird but cute creature that he told you about before.. you tried to get out of his chain-like hold. after many unsuccessful attempts, you finally managed to free yourself.

you sat on the edge of the bed as you felt your throat was so dry after that crying you did. you were about to get up when you caught daichi and started moving his hands.

he’s searching for me. you thought.

you were on your way to reach for his hands, when he suddenly sprang up with wide eyes.

“(y/n)!” he called out.

you jolted because of his sudden movements. he was frantically rubbing his eyes in order to get that clear view of the room. his gestures made you worry, so you held and stopped his hands from doing so.

“dai, i’m here.” you told him, putting his hands down along with yours. “good morning.”

his eyesight has finally adjusted and you were his first view.

your beautiful face that puts a blush on his cheeks. your sweet smile that calms his mind. your soft touches that makes him weak.

staring at your face, he realized that he’s not in a nightmare anymore. just like what happened earlier when we woke up for the first time today. you’re here in front of him, greeting him good morning just like always.

he pulled your hands to his face, feeling up the warmth it gives.

“g-good morning.” he replied, his voice cracking up from holding back his cry.

you smiled watching your husband snuggle himself to your hands, but it soon faded when you realized how scared and hurt he must’ve been when you suddenly disappeared.

“dai—” before you could even finish calling him, you suddenly found yourself caught by daichi’s arms again.

he buried his face on your chest and hugged you tight, tighter than he even did before.

“why…?” he muttered, words were muffled, but you can still hear him clearly.

“dai?” you called.

“why did you leave? you could’ve just slapped me. you could’ve just kicked me. you could’ve punched me. you could’ve told me to sleep outside. you can pull my hair, poke my eyes, hit my shin, step on my toes, throw all my clothes, burn them, spend all my money, cut my cards and everything to let out your frustrations and calm your anger, but why? why did you think of leaving me?” he reasoned.

you could feel your clothes getting wet, right where his eyes met your chest. his fingers on your back grasping onto your fabric. you wrapped your arms around his back.

“i was so scared. i thought i might never see you again. i thought we’ll never kiss each other good nights and good mornings again. i thought i’ll never be able to hold you like this anymore.” he continued.

“i’m sorry, i’m sorry. please don’t be mad at me anymore. i didn’t think through what was coming out of my mouth. i won’t ever do that again, please don’t leave me. i love you. you know, i love you so much, right?” he begged, finally looking up at you.

his eyes were filled with tears, just like how you were earlier. his face was desperate for your answer.

“dai.” you started. you pushed him away for a bit to look at him directly. he didn’t want to at first, but still complied with what you wanted, only if he held your hand. he’s scared that you might disappear from him again.

“why are you the one apologizing? it was my fault it all happened.” you told him, he was about to reply to you, but you halted him.

“i completely forgot our dinner. i forgot to message you about staying late to finish my work and i didn’t apologize for both. i got mad when you were only worried about me. i lied about not wanting to eat there and begged you for it.” you continued, looking at him straight in the eyes.

“and you’re right about it. i’m sorry for always dodging to own up for my own mistakes. i was scared that everything might be happening because of me again. i ran away from them, so i will not be blamed for it. it’s a bad habit that i need to work on.” you said, smiling at him.

you raised both of your hands to your chest level.

“and thank you for always understanding me. thank you for being so patient with me. i’m very lucky to have someone like you beside me.” you then went and hugged him.

“i’m supposed to be the one saying it.” you added.

“saying what?” he confusedly asked, but still hugged you back tightly.

“i’m going to be selfish and ask for it. i might be tiring to deal with at times, but please don’t leave me, daichi.” you said.

he suddenly chuckled.

“then that would make us both selfish then, since we're asking for the same thing.” he said before pulling you to his lap.

he sat you down there and wiped some tears that were escaping your eyes. he held your cheek with one hand and yours immediately followed it, holding his below your hands. he angled both of your heads and made your foreheads touch each other.

“i won’t promise that there will never be a fight anymore, but there’s one thing i will promise.”

you smiled when you realized that you know what he’s going to say next.

“i promise i’ll love you for eternity.” you said in chorus, making you two laugh.

you two laid in bed for a few minutes, before going down and eating breakfast with everyone. you ate in peace knowing you learned that maybe even just a little bit, you finally understand why.

the reason why people bother with love.

sometimes you will just find someone who will make you risk getting hurt as long as you get to be with them. sometimes it might not turn out the way you expected it, but sometimes when you overcome it and still be with them, it could be the greatest thing that would happen to you.

sawamura daichi, thank you for making me take the risk.

hope you enjoyed it! stay hydrated you all, it's so hot!

#haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu oneshot #sawamura daichi #sawamura daichi x reader #daichi x reader #sawamura x reader #luza-wayne #luza-wayne works #why people bother with love

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cathkaesque · 1 year

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Statement on Israel’s Use of Starvation as a Weapon of War in Gaza by the Union of Agricultural Work Committees, Palestine

For five days, Israel has attacked Gaza with the aim of total destruction, and the situation is at an unprecedented level of urgency. Israel’s actions have amounted to a humanitarian catastrophe of unfathomable proportions. At the time of publication, the Palestinian Ministry of Health reports 1,055 martyrs and approximately 5,184 injured.

Israel has declared a total warfare stance on Gaza, imposing a ruthless blockade that denies over two million Palestinian residents of Gaza access to electricity, water, food, fuel, medical supplies, and any humanitarian aid. Israeli Defense Minister Yoav Gallant explicitly stated this strategy on 9 October 2023, saying: “We are imposing a complete siege on [Gaza]. No electricity, no food, no water, no fuel – everything is closed. We are fighting human animals, and we act accordingly.”

Israel’s deliberate use of starvation as a weapon of war demands the international community immediately respond with unwavering urgency and resolve.

Israel is indiscriminately decimating hospitals, schools, mosques, markets, and entire neighborhoods. Further, Israel threatened Egypt that it would bomb humanitarian aid deliveries to Gaza, prompting Egypt to withdraw its aid convoys. The Rafah Crossing into Egypt, the sole international exit from Gaza, has been bombed by Israel three times in a 24-hour period. This calculated assault severs Gazans’ only means of escape from ceaseless bombings or access to essential humanitarian aid. With Israel cutting off Gaza’s source of electricity, the only source of power was the Gaza Power Plant, which has just run out of fuel. In the case that it receives more fuel, Israel has threatened to attack the plant.

Israel’s assault is deliberately destroying any infrastructure that allows Gazans to support themselves. Vital agricultural and fishing infrastructure, crucial for food production, have been mercilessly attacked. Fisher folk cannot access the sea, into which sewage is spilling. The seaport is damaged, and tools are obliterated. Farming areas, often near the fence, have become vulnerable targets in Israeli airstrikes, and farmers whose land has not been destroyed cannot access it for daily agricultural practices. The Ministry of Agriculture reports that the bombing has done immense damage to agricultural areas and poultry farms, but the conditions make it impossible to precisely assess the situation in the field. There is a catastrophic decrease in food stocks, with shops across Gaza reporting severe shortages. The land and sea will face unimaginable environmental damages following these attacks, further preventing efforts to rebuild livelihoods.

Israel’s strategy aims to ensure that those who survive the bombs are condemned to a future without sustenance.

OCHA reports that the assaults have disrupted the UNRWA food operation, impacting at least 112,759 families. The poultry and livestock sectors are on the brink of collapse due to the severe shortage of fodder, endangering the livelihoods of more than 1,000 herders and affecting over 10,000 producers. This jeopardizes the provision of animal protein and the availability of meat and fresh sources of protein for Gaza’s entire population. Transportation of poultry to markets has virtually halted, and dairy cattle milk cannot be refrigerated nor marketed to factories, resulting in an expected daily spoilage of 35,000 liters of milk. More than 4,000 fisheries are at risk due to the closure of the sea. Gaza’s agriculture, poultry, cattle, fish, and other products are suffering from a lack of refrigeration, irrigation, incubation, and other machinery due to electricity cuts, causing spoilage.

Israel’s use of these tactics is not new by any means. Before Saturday, around 65% of the Gazan population was food insecure. More than 46% of the agricultural land in Gaza was inaccessible, and the fishing industry was severely struggling since fishing off the coast of Gaza has been restricted by Israel to 3 to 6 nautical miles.

Food insecurity is a human-made crisis, and Israel is manufacturing a mass starvation of the Gazan people.

It is the moral and legal obligation of the international community to intervene and end this crisis immediately. Food, as a basic necessity, must be allowed to reach the people of Gaza, and the deliberate targeting of civilian infrastructure must cease without delay.

We call upon the international community to take immediate action to stop Israel’s massacre of the Gazan population, demand the lifting of the siege, and establish humanitarian corridors for entry of aid.

#palestine #la via campesina

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racefortheironthrone · 1 year

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Since SAG AFTRA has also gone on strike, does that mean the negotiations between the WGA and executives went poorly?

This is a great question, because it allows me to do some educating about labor law!

Today's topic: "bad faith" bargaining.

While often honored more in the breach than the observance, U.S labor law requires employers to engage in collective bargaining with unions, once those unions have been recognized as the "exclusive representative" of the workers via card check or union election.

Because Leon Keyserling and Senator Robert Wagner were not idiots and could see it coming that employers would drag out negotiations in order to try to destroy the union through attrition, the Wagner Act of 1935 required employers to not just negotiate with unions, but to negotiate "in good faith" and made it a violation of the law to negotiate in bad faith.

Two major forms of negotiating in bad faith are "dilatory tactics" (deliberately using the procedures of collective bargaining and labor law more generally to delay the process) and "surface bargaining" (where the employer goes through the motions of meeting with the union, but refuses to engage in substantive discussions). This can include stuff like sending representatives who don't have authority to negotiate, refusing to schedule sessions or trying to unilaterally control the timeline, not asking questions or engaging in back-and-forth discussion, refusing to discuss topics that are germane to conditions of employment, and so forth.

These kinds of actions are considered Unfair Labor Practice violations and the NLRB can issue "cease and desist" orders and "affirmative bargaining" orders, as well as some rather creative "special remedies" that get around the Wagner Act's lack of monetary penalties. As that suggests, however, part of the problem is that because the Wagner Act doesn't have significant monetary penalties, a lot of companies will just budget a line item for breaking the law and treat that as the cost of doing business, while using the same dilatory tactics to appeal NLRB decisions through the courts in the hope that they can outlast the union. (This is why one of the most effective labor law reforms that could be passed in a Democratic Congress would be adding compounding daily monetary penalties and streamlining the ULP process in both the NLRB and the courts.)

From what I've read of the negotiations, I think there's a pretty clear cut case that AMPTP engaged in surface bargaining and used dilatory tactics, with the intent to run out the clock and thus provoke a strike in which they believed economic pressure would force the union into surrender, essentially a lock-out without declaring a lock-out.

I think it's backfired on them. A big part of AMPTP's strategy for winning that strike was to divide-and-rule - hence why they came to an agreement with the Director's Guild - by getting through the lean months by filming and releasing shows and movies with already-completed scripts. Now that SAG-AFTRA is on strike, that lifeline of content is immediately cut - which means AMPTP is going to run out of revenue in the near future, which as WGA leaders have pointed out means bad quarterly earnings reports, which means stock prices tank, which means investors and boards of directors get angry and executives become the ones facing the prospect of losing their jobs at the same time that all the compensation they've structured as stock options to avoid taxes loses value.

#labor law #labor history #trade unions #collective bargaining #sag strike #wga strike

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literaryvein-reblogs · 1 month

Text

Writing Notes: Procrastination

All writers have been there.

You’ve had a week to complete a project; now it’s the last day before the deadline, and you still haven’t started. You know you need to get to work, and you know that time is of the essence; yet even as you watch the clock tick, tick, ticking away the minutes until your work is due, you just can’t seem to sit down and do it.

Why does this happen, and what can you do to escape it?

The good news is that researchers and professionals (who also experience the temptation to procrastinate) have analyzed the reasons why people put things off and developed solutions to help.

By understanding why we procrastinate, we are better able to apply effective solutions that help us avoid putting off writing and manage our time in general.

Why Do People Procrastinate?

FEAR

Fear is one of the strongest human emotions, and it is fear that can hold us back from taking action on our work, especially when it comes to writing.

Different types of fear can keep us from reaching our goals, such as writing or other assignments.

Here are a few types:

Fear of failure

Fear of losing autonomy (control over the work)

Fear of being alone

Being aware of these fears and acknowledging them helps decrease their power to make us procrastinate.

PERFECTIONISM

We all want our final submissions to be the best they can be, but sometimes our desire for perfection gets in the way of our ability to produce something.

If we can’t write that perfect essay, we’d rather just not write at all.

It may appear more comforting to write a mediocre paper believing we could have written a better one if we had started earlier, than to plan ahead and risk winding up with a paper that is still imperfect.

However, like many parts of daily life, writing can be complex.

Rather than aiming for a perfect, final product, focus on possible paths and steps to get there.

TOO BUSY

Sometimes, it’s not that we are fearful or over-critical, but we are simply too busy.

We have jobs, children, and other obligations that take up a majority of our time.

At the end of a long, busy day, it is easy to put off an assignment until tomorrow.

Busy lives mean we deserve to take breaks; however, this is also a reason to plan ahead for off-days.

DISSATISFACTION WITH WRITING & REVISING

Revising a first draft can be one of the most difficult parts of writing.

When we read our own writing and encounter imperfections, it is easy to become discouraged and avoid moving forward.

By procrastinating, we try to ensure we will not have to face the uncomfortable task of revising.

While revising can be uncomfortable, there are some strategies below to help make this process easier.

What Can You Do About It?

TAKE STOCK: Why Are You Procrastinating?

The first step towards working on your procrastination habits is to identify why you are putting things off in the first place.

Think about the reasons described above, and see if any of them apply to you.

Consider your overall work and writing habits, and go from there.

EVALUATE YOUR ENVIRONMENT

If you’re already struggling with procrastination, one goal is to find a place where you are most likely to actually work.

A noisy computer lab or an apartment where your roommate is watching TV at top volume may not be the best places to write.

Try to find a place where you can clear your mind from distractions and focus, but where you are also comfortable and at ease.

However, be sure not to spend an excessive amount of time trying to create the perfect work environment.

As procrastinators, we may risk spending all day trying to find the perfect writing place and not actually do any writing, so remember your objectives when evaluating the environment.

ASK FOR HELP

As with any other problem you may experience in life, there is no shame in reaching out for help with your procrastination.

Talk to your professor, classmates, or friends about the issues you are having.

Visit your university's Writing Center, and talk with a consultant, as all of us have likely had issues with procrastination in our work.

The goal is to have someone hold you accountable, almost like a sponsor.

Identify what steps you need to take to get an assignment done, and ask them to check up on you to hold you to it.

SET GOALS & REWARDS

It may seem obvious, but setting goals can be a productive means of avoiding procrastination.

However, be careful not to be overly ambitious when planning goals; trying to get too much done at once could be one reason for procrastination.

Instead, set smaller, more incremental goals.

For instance, tell yourself that today, if you do nothing else, you will complete the Works Cited section of your paper or finish your introduction.

You can also incentivize your writing by rewarding yourself for goals met, such as a favorite candy, funny video, or walk with a friend.

If you don’t want to commit to any one section of the paper, tell yourself that you’ll write at least two hundred words, one paragraph, or for three, separate, thirty-minute sessions.

Goals such as these are easily attainable and will help you start working without overwhelming you.

THINK ABOUT YOUR WRITING PROCESS

You may not think you have a “writing process,” but you do.

Everyone does, and each person’s style may differ from another’s.

Consider what you usually do first when writing a paper.

Maybe you start at the beginning, writing your introduction, then the body, then the conclusion, or maybe you outline and then start in the middle.

Maybe you like music, ambient noise, or silence.

You might prefer working in the morning or in the evening.

Think about whether a process is working for you, and don’t be afraid to try something new.

WORK ON WHAT YOU CAN

We often feel pressured, when we sit down to work on an assignment, to finish it all at once.

This can backfire and keep us from working at all. Instead, try looking at any amount of work you complete for what it is: progress.

Even if you only write one sentence, that is one more sentence than what you had before.

WORK ON REVISIONS

If you get stuck in a certain area of your paper, take a break from that section and look over the rest of the paper.

Carefully search for any ambiguities or anything you might want to add, remove, or revisit.

This may not seem like progress, but it will help you improve your paper while giving you a break from the part on which you’re stuck.

CONSIDER YOUR "BLANK TIMES"

Think about your schedule, and work on making what is known as an “unschedule.”

This involves mapping out all the things you already spend time on, rather than writing down what you need to do, like with a regular schedule.

After you have done this, look for blank spaces.

With these blank spaces, plan out a writing schedule using your set goals.

Also, remember it is natural to have off-days.

When these happen, adjust your schedule to avoid last-minute delays.

NOTE: As you work on your procrastination, keep in mind that overcoming or mitigating this issue is similar to writing itself: a process that takes time and effort. Don’t expect to break a procrastination habit overnight. Rather, just like writing, work on it a little at a time, as much as you can, and don’t give up.

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ofmdrecaps · 1 month

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08/12-13/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; David Jenkins; Rhys Darby; Taika Waititi; Vico Ortiz; Kristian Nairn; Samba Schutte; Leslie Jones; Dominic Burgess; Alex Sherman; WBD News Articles; Fan Spotlight: Cast Cards; Our Flag Means Fanfiction; Never Left Podcast; Love Notes; Today's Taika Tuesday;

== David Jenkins ==

Chaos Dad has certainly been living up to his name! He's been keeping the fandom busy with reposting lovely artwork from our crew, and responding to various ponderings!

Source: David Jenkins Twitter

He even confirmed some Evelyn/Mary Theories made by our dear friend @patchworkpiratebear!

Source: David Jenkins Twitter

== Rhys Darby ==

Some more shots of Edinburgh Fringe!

Source: TheWeeReview Instagram

== Taika Waititi ==

Just a quick vid of Taika out in Ibiza a couple weeks back!

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Taika Ora (Fan Page) (@taika_ora)

instagram

Source: Taika_Ora's Instagram

Also-- 3 years ago Aug 13th, Free Guy came out! So folks are celebrating the anniversary!

Source: Instagram

== Vico Ortiz ==

Vico has been posting lots of pics lately-- but recently shared that Aug 12 was their 2 year anniversary with Jack!

Source: Vico Ortiz Instagram

In other news, Vico will be honored with the Coyote Courage Award a the 1st Annual 29 Queer Film Festival! Thank you to @adoptourcrew for highlighting this amazing honor for Vico!

Here's the Article:

Source: Adopt Our Crew Instagram

Vico is asking for some feedback! You can send it to them on their Instagram Story!

Source: Vico Ortiz' Instagram Stories

== Leslie Jones ==

Leslie met Sha'Carri Richardson!

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Leslie Jones (@lesdogggg)

instagram

Source: Leslie's Instagram

== Samba Schutte ==

Samba's back in Holland!

Source: Samba's Instagram

== Kristian Nairn ==

The new Audo Drama Podcast -- Dungeon Masters with Kristian is finally out! Check it out wherever you love to listen!

Source: Dungeon Masters Spotify

== Alex Sherman ==

#AssTonight has been extended to #AssTomorrow and #AssForever!

Source: Alex Shermans' Instagram

And if you didn't love Alex enough, he's been a camp counselor for the "Experience Camps", which is a non-profit that helps transform the lives of grieving kids through summer camp programs and year round initiatives!

Source: ItsAshlyPerez' Instagram

== Dominic Burgess ==

Dominic is out at the new Alien Premiere!

Source: Dominic's Twitter

== WBD News ==

More Articles on WBD and the tanking stocks!

Source: Never Left Podcast Twitter

== Fan Spotlight ==

= Cast Cards =

More cast cards tonight from the wonderful @melvisik! You just keep bringing more and more of our lovely crew to light! Thank you hon! First up is Kian F, and Marcin K! They are unspecified but Mel thinks they're Action Talent found via ofmd-crew.com!

The next up almost needs no introduction, she's our fabulous Costume Designer for S2, Gypsy Taylor!!

And last but not least, you probably recognize her from all her BTS, Set Dresser, Lindsey Cantrell!

Source: @melvisik's Twitter

= Our Flag Means Fanfiction =

New Epitizer from Our Flag Means FanFiction! Ready by Cheesecake3! Check them out here!

Source: Our Flag Means Fanfiction Instagram

OFMFanfiction needs your help! Help them pick a new sign off slogan! Reach out to them on their instagram!

Source: Our Flag Means Fanfiction Instagram

= Never Left Podcast =

New episode of Never Left Podcast! Part 3 of Motifs! Check them out on your favorite listening platform!

Source: Never Left Podcast Instagram

== Love Notes ==

Hey there lovelies, another busy couple of days. My son starts kindergarten tomorrow! Boy how time flies, huh? I feel like I was pregnant like last month, and here he is grown up and 5 years old, and off to school. Do you remember those days? I remember my first day of kindergarten. I'm 38 years old, and that's still a day I remember. I remember the brown wall with the pink buttlerflies of my classroom, and the desks I'd never seen before. I remember being scared...wondering why I was in a new place I didn't recognize, but I remember having such a great time too. I remember counting to 25, and reading Berenstain Bears books, and making friends and I don't remember a lot of other days from that year, but I remember that one. It's amazing what little things in life we remember, even 30+ years later. Remember to take a moment to smile and enjoy things even when they're a bit scary lovelies. Sometimes they turn out to be wonderful memories. I hope you're all staying healthy <3 Just some quick love notes tonight-- the first from our Pirate queen, and the second from the darling TheLatestKate <3

Source: Ruibo Qian's Instagram

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by @thelatestkate

instagram

== Today's Taika Tuesday ==

In honor of this Taika Tuesday which falls on the 3rd anniversary of Free Guy, have some Antwan <3 Gif courtesy of the lovely @neverswungonswingingstars

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quartermera · 1 year

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Daily Actions that Nami, Robin and Bonney Find Attractive

Hi everyone! Once again, no one requested this, but I really wanted to make a version of these with wahmen. It will probably be the last one for while though, because I am starting to feel like I am repeating myself. !Gender & race neutral reader !Reader is mentioned to have hair

Nami

When you model different outfits for her

Watching you do your morning routine (brush teeth, comb hair, and anything else you may do)

Nami would love to watch you sleep

But after a while she would be tempted to wake you up, either playfully or naughtily

Watching you undress. Not in a naughty way, rather the casual nudity and that you feel comfortable around her

When you wear a bathrobe

Especially if it's the sexy, silk type of think

Nami loves it when you play along with her trying to "extort" money from the Strawhats

Even if you'd gently call her out about it later

She loves when you get her presents! Gift giving would probably be one of her main love languages

And yes, bonus points if it's something for her maps or jewelry

When you tend to your hair, and maybe add little trinkets, a headband or anything like that

When you take pictures of her

Or when you take pictures together :3

Girl is ready to pose in lingerie if it's for you

She likes when you come up with new ways to decorate your room/cabin

She'll help you find trinkets to match what you're looking for

Nami would find it amusing if you playfully bowed to her every once in a while

Nico Robin

When you rest your head on her shoulder

Seeing you concentrated on a task

Bonus point if you're just reading

When you're gently petting a cat

Watching you do something you're good at (playing an instrument, drawing, writing, you name it)

Robin has a soft spot for watching you put on stockings

Or a button up shirt

Bonus points if you roll up the sleeves

Oddly specific, but when you tend to plants

Sharing a glass of wine or a cup of tea with you

When you rest your head in her lap

Reading together

Taking a bath together *chef's kiss*

When you spontaneously link your pinky fingers as you walk together

Robin would love listening to you talk. About your childhood, your dreams, your fears, whatever you wish to tell her about

When you're the one suggesting a date, like inviting her to the restaurant or such

She also thinks it's adorable if she can get you flustered

Overall, Robin would take any chance she gets to spend time with you

Jewelry Bonney

Watching you stretch

When you play with an animal

Bonus point if it's a dog

When you surprise her with a snack

When you snake your arm around her (waist, shoulders, whichever you prefer)

(But she has a soft spot for waist an hips)

Even better! If you put your hand in her back pocket! Yes, it's cheesy, but she loves it

Milk/coffee/cocoa mustaches

When you lean against something relatively tall, like a bar counter

Watching you slip into a shirt, especially if slightly oversized

Or when you wear smth that hangs loosely on your hips

God she wants to pull you into a room then and there

I know this won't apply to everyone, but she'd love piercings and tattoos

When you lie in bed together and you casually hold onto one of her boobs

Fishnet anything

If she's sitting and you let your hand rest in the crook of her neck

Or on her thigh if you're sitting next to her

Or if you whole ass put one of your legs over hers

She's a sucker for physical touch, okay?

#one piece #nami #nico robin #jewelry bonney #one piece imagine #one piece headcanons #nami x reader #one piece x reader #nico robin x reader #jewelry bonney x reader #nami imagines #nami headcanons #nico robin imagines #nico robin headcanons #jewelry bonney headcanons #jewelry bonney imagines #nille writes #gender neutral reader #race neutral reader

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strangersteddierthings · 11 months

Text

No Regrets - Part Two

TW: OC Character Death (dude doesn't even get a name). Steve reflects on killing both demo-creatures and humans with detachment. Mentions of Major Character Deaths but as a reminder, they don't stay dead! (Well, Chrissy and Fred do)

Part One🦇 Part Two🦇Part Three🦇Part Four🦇Part Five🦇Part Six

Maybe he should feel bad about watching Robin grow smaller in the rear-view mirror, her face a mixture of disbelief and anger. Maybe he should feel regret for his actions, for the betrayal Robin probably feels right now.

He doesn't.

Looking at the bigger picture, at the regrets he actually does have in the waking world, this is small potatoes. A non-issue. Robin will forgive him in the end.

War Zone is like a ghost town compared to the first time Steve was here. Though, that should have been expected. The panic hasn't swept through town yet. So far, it's just one dead girl. Fred'll join her sometime this afternoon. Evening? Sometime later today.

Nineteen-year-old Steve would hate himself for not trying to help. For not doing his best to save Fred.

But.

Well, Fred dying will help Dustin, in the long run. Will help Eddie. And that's more important. That's the goal. The dream, if he's allowing himself to be cheeky in his own mind.

Steve's not heartless, or anything like that. Robin, his Robin in the waking world, still calls him a softy and worries his kindness will get him killed on the daily. He always puts the safety of the group above himself. The first to volunteer on supply runs or for scouting or taking watch through the night. He knows he can run on empty for much longer than anyone else he knows.

The end of the world has a way of skewing what kindness and softness are, though. Those first few months were the hardest. Steve wanted to save everyone they came across. Help as many people as possible, but rations run dangerously low that way. Clean water can become contaminated quickly by ignorant people. Not everyone handled the apocalypse with grace.

The first harsh lesson Steve had learned was two months into the end of the world. They'd ventured to Indy to find supplies. Medicines. Try and stock up on things they didn't need yet but wanted around for the just in case of it all. They'd found some survivors, which wasn't surprising in itself. The surprising bit was that these guys had made it on complete luck it seemed. They were loud. Jumpy. Panicky.

When Lucas and Mike, on scout duty, had reported back demogorgon activities nearby, one guy started to panic. Got loud and couldn't bring himself back down. Steve was closest, tried to shush him but he wouldn't be quiet.

"Move," Murray (may he rest in peace) whispered, seeming to have appeared from nowhere, shoving Steve away, nudging him out of the way. Murray stepped behind the guy, one hand covering his nose and mouth, the other arm around his neck. It made the guy panic more, fighting Murray and then Murray just-

Steve remembers he flinched at the noise, turning away to cover his mouth and calm his own panic. The noises stopped though. Steve had shot a horrified look to Hopper, but Hopper wasn't looking at Steve. He was looking beyond, at Murray and what he'd done, nodding his approval.

The demogorgons didn't find them that day.

"You can't help everyone, Steve," Murray said, once they'd started the trek back to Hawkins. "The safety of the group comes first, over just one person."

Lesson heard. Lesson learned. Lesson put to use four months later.

So. Fred must die, for the good of the group. Patrick, too, if Steve can't get to Vecna in time. He should be able to. Vecna will try and take Max first, tomorrow. Patrick the day after. If everything stays the same.

The clerk doesn't even blink at what Steve buys, or the quantity of what he buys, but his eyebrows do go up a little at the total.

Steve hesitates just a bit over the checkbook his parents gave him the first time they'd left him home alone at fourteen. For emergencies only, Steven. It's been sitting in his glove box, unused, since he turned sixteen. He's never wanted to have to explain what he'd used it for. Nothing had ever seemed like enough of an emergency to warrant explaining it to Richard Harrington.

He does find it a little odd that his mind is conjuring up the concept of money. Of all the little things to think about while he sleeps, he really didn't think his subconscious would bring capitalism back.

Steve rips the little check out of the booklet and hands it over. The clerk looks it over before giving a nod and finishing the cash out. Steve takes the receipt when it's offered, shoving it into the checkbook before shoving that into his back pocket.

The parking lot has one other person in it, who Steve is aware of the entire time he's loading the trunk of his car with gallons of lighter fluid, weapons, and padded camouflage. It's only after Steve's slammed the trunk closed and shoved the cart back towards the front of the store that the guy watching him speaks.

"Must be some bonfire you're planning."

Steve rounds his car and opens the door before answering. "It's spring break, man." He slides in, the door falling closed after him. He buckles up, starts the car, and heads home. The house will be empty, he knows.

He works in silence, unloading the car and organizing his haul in the dining room, eyes flicking to the clock. There's still a couple of hours before dark. Before he should go check if Eddie's still in the boathouse, or if the police did go find him.

He sets the timer on the stove for an hour and flops onto his couch and sighs. Just as comfy as he remembers. He can have a nap before making sure Eddie's in jail. Surely his dream will allow him that?

"Mmhm," Steve mumbles as his neck protests movement. He's slow to wake. His head feels like white noise. He thinks he was dreaming but he can't quite grasp at what it was... oh. Family Video and War Zone. Reliving a memory. He wonders if Robin is still mad at him for that day, ditching her with Dustin and Max. It'd been for a good reason and- Steve wrinkles his nose as he sits up, head still static-y. Was it for a good reason? He can't remember what else happened after that....

"He rises," Robin whispers next to him, spooking him. She comes into focus as he sits up straight, leaning out of her space to look at her. She gives him a smile, judging by the crinkle around her eyes and her cheeks rounding. The gas mask prevents him seeing her real smile and he misses it. He thinks about his dream, and getting to see all of Robin's face again.

Dreaming is bittersweet.

"I miss anything?" He asks, because it's a safe question.

"Scouts radioed. The way should be clear in another," Robin grabs his wrist and twists so she can see the time on his watch, "another twenty minutes or so."

The mention of the radio makes him think of Dustin, and how much he misses him. And thinking of Dustin makes him think of Eddie. Steve knows it's irrational for him to miss someone he never knew but that doesn't stop the ache. The almost of it all sits heavy in his chest.

"Right," Steve says. "Want to see how many rounds of Rock, Paper, Scissors we can get through in twenty minutes?"

Robin shuffles sideways to be facing him and holds her hands up. "You always lose but okay."

They get about twelve rounds into it before Steve finds himself asking, "Hey Robbie. Do you remember Spring Break?"

Her hands freeze in the air, an aborted motion to make paper to beat Steve's rock. She locks eyes with him for a moment and he can see the worry there. "I- Steve. Is it- did you take a hit? Is it your head? Should I not have let you nap?"

No. No, he doesn't think he got hurt on this run. Well, his shoulder hurts from when he stumbled and slammed into wall during the last loading of the truck, but he hadn't hit his head. He thinks. "I don't know... I hit the wall hard, shoulder hurts, but I didn't hit my head. I don't remember hitting my head."

Robin stands immediately and begins jabbing her fingers around his skull. "Anything tender?"

"Nope. Just a messed up hairdo," Steve swats her hands away.

"Well, you can never be too sure. You are precious cargo. Why did you ask about the start of the apocalypse?"

Steve shrugs. What can he say? That he's forgetting the start of all their horrors? He can't say that, not without coming across like he's either crazy or bragging. Remember the week that ruined our lives and gave us all enough trauma to fill an ocean? Yeah, well, I don't so ha!

He can't be sure but he thinks Robin frowns beneath her mask. "We'll have to have someone look you over when we get back. Steve, if you're losing your memories..."

"I'm not losing memories," Steve lies. Head trauma is serious and he knows he can't take one more hit to the head. He won't be able to continue helping with supply runs or patrols if he is getting worse. If he starts getting migraines, they'll reassign him for sure. Something that doesn't let him leave the safety of their home base at the high school.

"Steve," she warns. He knows it's a warning.

He shakes his head. "I just. I had a dream about Saturday. Very vivid. Just made me think about it, is all."

Robin softens, sinking back down to sit beside him. She finally answers, "yeah. I remember Spring Break."

"I miss everyone," he confesses, because it's true. Because it's safe.

"Me too," Robin says, leaning her mask against his.

They wait in silence until the scouts call the all clear and they can head back home.

They make it back to Hawkins before night falls but just barely. The gates get rolled shut behind them and the unpacking gets started. The whole community has gathered for their return. This is their longest run to date with how far they had to go this time and Steve doesn't blame anyone for needing to see their loved ones as soon as possible.

"Robin!"

Steve turns just in time to watch Vickie launch herself at Robin. Robin must have seen her running, though, because she's already braced for impact and catches Vickie easily, arms grabbing at Vickie's thighs to support her weight as she wraps them around Robin's waist. Vickie places her forehead to Robin's as their excitement switches to tenderness and Steve averts his eyes to give them privacy in this moment.

"Steve, here," Ted Wheeler offers up a box to Steve, who takes it without question. "For the Daycare."

"You got it."

The Daycare is actually a wing of the school that used to be where the language arts classes were held. Daycare doesn't quite sum up what they use the area for, but calling it the Orphanage was too dark. Steve waits through the decontamination process. Once through, he takes the time to pull his mask off and enjoy the feeling of an artificial breeze on his face before heading to the Daycare.

"Please tell me there's something useful in that box," Annie Click says when Steve pushes his way into one of the rooms they use for school. Another room is dedicated to being a daycare, kids too little for learning, another is schooling for kids who would be in middle school, and the last room is lines with beds.

"Sorry, Mrs. Click, but I didn't pack it," Steve says apologetically.

"My problem to sort out then," she stands and Steve can see the determination in her through the weariness. She'd been a bitter old lady as his teacher but the world ending must have shifted her priorities. There's no one better suited to look after the kids than her, here.

Except maybe Joyce, but she's got bigger things to deal with.

He heads for the door when Annie calls out to him, "Since you're here, would you mind checking on the kids for me? Holly's supervising bedtime but she's lenient with her friends."

"Will do."

He heads across the hall and down a door to the sleeping room. The lights are dimmed and peeking in he sees a lot of kids sleeping, or pretending their best to be. Holly is sitting in a rolling chair near the door, one leg bend and pulled up on the seat as she rests her head on it.

Steve clears his throat to get her attention. She must have heard his footsteps because she doesn't spook. Just uses the foot on the ground to spin the chair to face the door. "Oh. Hi Steve."

"All good here?" He whispers.

"Yeah. Everyone's asleep."

"You can probably head home now. Your dad's back."

Holly shrugs one shoulder at him, spinning the chair back away. "Maybe later."

Steve takes the hint and backs away. His chest aches for Holly. All the kids had to grow up fast, given the state of the world, but Holly's hurts him most. He knew her in the Before, and she was there when Karen... Well, she's got a lot of weight on her shoulders at barely eleven years old.

To think. If they'd have been faster on that Spring Break. More diligent, thorough. Holly might have never known about the Upside Down at all.

More regret he can carry, he thinks, as he shoves his mask back on and heads back to the truck. There's more to be unloaded, and always work around to keep him so busy he doesn't have to think of the regrets.

He works so late into the night that once he gets back to his cot and collapses into it, there are no thoughts let in his mind as sleep claims him.

@i-less-than-three-you @nburkhardt @afewproblems @skepsiss @music9009 @apomaro-mellow @soaringornithopter @reighnofdreams @eddie-munsons-lunchbox @sirsnacksalot @livelifeliketheresnotomorow @sageclipse @schnukiputz @mbloggotdeletedsothisismybackup @lumoschildextra @juleswashere3 @yet-still-more-banched @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @yearningagain @starlight-archer @andrew-mini-ard @chaosgremlinmunson @aol19 @goodolefashionedloverboi @gutterflower77 @moomkin77

#steddie #my fic #time travel au #apocalypse au #it's both #is steve dreaming? time traveling while he sleeps? will his changes matter?#i mean im pretty sure we all know the answers to that but im pretending i can be cheeky about it all #also if u think i made a mistake in my plot or that ive forgotten my own lore just know... that maybe that was on purpose #butterfly effect AU might be a better thing to call this

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