#Hey you don't know you're preggers

[witchofthesouls]

Alright, a continuation of Bayverse Autobots dealing with a rogue human carrier due to the absolute fuckery (as in the noncon body modification and unethical human experimentation) from Sector Seven.

(Needless to say, Optimus makes a good impression. The rest of them? Not so much...)

You’re not exactly sure how to feel about your life at the moment. Just one major upheaval after another. It feels more from like a supernatural or superhero action movie with the subplot of a shadow government agency making people disappear Just Because insert-whatever-plot-revalent-reason-of-ultimate-power… 

In the end, there’s no secret order or great prophecy or hidden school with a twinkling headmaster too full of secrets and too much regrets. Just a human that managed to escape on sheer dumb luck that’s trying lay down low and not get caught.

The accelerated healing seems to either cure your terminal illness or keep it in check, but you’re no Deadpool. Jumping from one fourth-story window is one time too many, and not a thing you wish to repeat if it can be avoided.

Now your life is veering into another direction. A sci-fi one.

One with aliens.

Giant metal titans that can transform in vehicles and what not.

What not also includes the ability to project a physical avatar which is sitting across from you right now as you’re wolfing down the fourth Grand Slam plate. Leo Cullen, the alias, is still nursing his hot chocolate, the lumberjack slam barely touched; whereas Optimus, the real man… mecha, alien, is parked outside.

A boot taps your shoe, you look up to see him smile, dimpled and a bit crooked, as he pushes his plate forward and quickly switches it with your empty one.

You’ve gotten used to the constant low buzz at the back of your neck, but the sudden jolt that sears your spine is a different story.

You stop eating. Fork down and napkin up as you pay attention to the direction.

“Something wrong?”

“I think it’s an eyelash.” The lie comes easily. After all, you and him are both hiding in plain sight for similar reasons. “Hold on.”

The angle of the compact mirror catches a couple half-asleep at their table, and behind them, an older man with greying red hair with glasses. He’s staring at you and a flare lights your nerves on fire.

The table rattles as you push up, the smile feels like a grimace as you say you’re going to the toilet.

The restroom is single users and it suits your needs perfectly. In the reflection, a wan face stares back at you; still thin and sharp from the weight loss and stress still etched on your features. Recovery is an absolute bitch and being on the run gives it a caustic tongue.

Splashing water over your face does little to settle your newfound sparky nerves, and you’re finishing up when there’s a loud click of the door unlocking without your damn permission and it swings open to-

“There you are!” 

The face and body is different, softer with floral wear but the same greying red hair and glasses. You hold your breath and let the static build in your gut. There’s a distant thought that’s amazed by the aliens’ adaptiveness. To have different forms at a blink of an eye? What a skill to have…

They’re saying something but it doesn’t matter. All you need is for them to come closer. Closer.

Cold porcelain digs into your lower back as you wait for the door to finally settle, and finally-

You have no idea who’s more surprised when they disintegrate in an electric rain as you dig your hands into them. The gold chains and rings around your palms and fingers aren’t to just look pretty.

The dryer sputters in a slow death and soap dispenser sparks, drooling out all of its contents. Only the toilet and sink escaped due to the lack of sensors. Lucky them that you’re getting better at that trick. You once shorted out half a block -signs, posts, and even the cars, nothing was left unaffected- to escape in the dark streets.

It does leave you off-kilter: bodily disconnected, yet hyper-aware of all the running currents.

Leo’s outside the door, and you force your shaking, wet hands to smooth out the static in your hair, patting them dry with your clothes. (A small, distant part of yourself jokes about matching Leo’s greying side streaks should you ever return to your original hair.)

There’s concern on his face and he says something but you honestly want to go back to bed. Just sleep it off for awhile.

He pulls you close and hot air hits your wet face. Sun beating overhead and you drag your feet to disperse the extra charge, teeth hurting whenever a radio is changed.

Leo makes no comment when you kick up dust, but he hum in a strange singsong and unrecognizable tune that bleeds out the itch under your skin.

Besides the weirdly green ambulance in the far corner, there’s a hummer and a sports car nearby giving you the same sharp sense of jittery awareness. And unlike the ambulance who’s avatar you knocked out, those two weren’t muted and had their attention on you.

Static numbs your clenched fingers and your spine buzzes as you and Leo pass them. You're tense. Absolutely ready to bolt away, and if it wasn't for the arm around your shoulders and the calming presence exuded by Leo, you're pretty sure you would have taken your chances to run into traffic. 

The lizard part of your brain is still screaming to try: Don’t turn your back!

A bizarre sensation of cool water slides down your neck and you shiver as it spreads down your back, like a huge icy-hot pack and a massage as it rolls and digs into your muscles, unknotting them, playfully tapping each individual knobs of your spine. 

It’s enough to shove the overwhelming urge to run to back of your head. Enough to realize that you need to breathe and had a death grip on Leo’s clothes. Leather and flannel twisted in your hands, straining the materials even.

In a way, you’re operating on a cross between autopilot and hyperviligance. You know that the Leo/Optimus hybrid is physically guiding you back to him, but your entire focus is tracking the other not-cars. Too many, persists the lizard, what’s stopping them?

You’re suddenly back inside the cab, seatbelts curling and sliding back to its proper place. 

Your life is turning upside-down again, but all you do is stumble to the bed in the back. Too strung out by everything to speak. The mattress shifts and bury your face into the eerily smooth skin of a neck and inhale the mix of tires, metal, and fire. He pulls you over to rest right on top of him and you follow it, soaking his body heat and matching his slow rise of his chest.

Optimus hums, the pitch low, and you realize it’s his whole frame, not just the avatar, that’s gently vibrating in a strangely soothing noise that slowly eases away the harsh tension in your back and unclenches your belly, limbs relaxing as you cling to the other body and broad hands, warm and sure, are resting on your lower back, heat sinking into the sore muscles.

Hunger still nips at your senses, but it’s the exhaustion that drags you down.

The noise drowns out the sharp awareness that’s outside, and somewhere between the easy, slow strokes across your lower back and rocking motions of the drive, you fall asleep.

You’re vaguely aware you’re purring back.

_________________

:: Congratulations, Prime, we have a feral carrier in our grasp now. ::

[lord-westley]

Batfamily + Others as convos between @cam-the-orange-cat @markisnot and I

-

Jason: that is so fake- Dads don't change their ways that fast

Dick: How would you know??

Jason, cackles in daddy issues:

-

Tim: How did that roof not cave in, I would cave in

Steph: My pussy wouldn't cave in

-

Barbara: Have you ever swallowed-

Dick: I have indeed swallowed before

-

Superman: He's hot

Green Lantern: He is not hot

Superman: How is he not hot??

Green Lantern: I don't have a mask kink like you??

-

Tim: Dude, cats have vaginas. How else do you think they get preggers??

Duke: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY HAVE VAGINAS. AINT NO WAY

Tim: How do you not know this??

Duke: There's no- bro hold on

Duke: Hey Alexa, do cats have vaginas?

Alexa: This might answer your question. Cats have four legs.

-

Jon: Why is my heart rate going like 100

Jon: There's no reason for me to be anxious

Damian: It's cause you're poor

-

Bizzaro about Roy: Have you tried turning him off and on again?

Starfire: I will never turn him on

Jason: I will

-

Cass: I found

Cass: a mini sign

Bruce: mini sign?? From god??

[quitealotofsodapop]

[Jackpotshipping/Ace and Joker are both laughing cus "We're old as hell! It ain't happening!"]

Maybe if they only stick it in the backdoor, eh?

[Cue them learning the term "geriatric pregnancy" and both panicking Hard.]

Why can I picture Starfruit just googling it after Jackpot said the previous statement and just showing the results to them?

[One half of their twins could still be a dumpster baby/hospital freebie thats a doppleganger for their bio one - just for funsies.]

Ooh! Ooh! Thought! There is this comic that makes rounds on tumblr about some fairies replacing a human child with a changeling - but they forgot to take the human child! So, the mom is confused by the second kid and the dad is like 'hey, twins, good job, honey'.

What if that happens? Like, some demons wanted the child of the Great Sage for some nefarious reason and to keep it hidden, they planned to replace the kid, but they fucked up.

And now Jackpot is 30% certain only one had been born, but 70% are like 'hey, free baby' XD

Referencing these posts about Jackpotshipping having more kids + possible destined Eclipse Twins.

Oh gosh, Ace and Joker are just bragging about how unlikely it is for them to have bio kids at their age, meanwhile Starfruit casually starts typing into his phone like;

Starfruit: "Yeah, oldest mortal human parent was 74." Ace, pauses mid-brag: "Excuse me?" Peach: "Lao Tzu's mom was also preggers with him for like 80 years. So she was like mega-old when she had him." Ace: "Excuse me!?" Starfruit: "Yeah and with changes in like nutrition and stuff, people are having their first bio-kid like a lot later than during ancient times. You guys are like... in your 50s or 60s? You're not out of the woods yet dudes." Ace & Joker: *caught between horror at the knowledge + offended that Starfuit thinks they look that old*

[comic that makes rounds on tumblr about some fairies replacing a human child with a changeling - but they forgot to take the human child!]

I remember that comic!

And that def sounds like a scenario Jackpotshipping finds themselves in. Like they're in the post-natal room after having their single kid (surprise miracle baby), look over, and see that there's suddenly two?? Like, when did that happen???

Joker: "I mean... that epidural stuff is wild. Thing 2 coulda slid out when we weren't looking." Ace: "Makes sense. But now I can't tell who arrived first." Joker: "Eh, lets just say they arrived at the same time. No one will question it. If they do; just say shapeshifting." Ace: "Hehe, gross. Welcome to the world Two-Pair!" Joker: "Oh man, Xiaozhēn [their grown-up dumpster "MK]" is in for a shock."

(Meanwhile with the most incompetent demons ever...)

NewGods!Jin: "I 'fink we forgot a huge step of that changeling plan." NewGods!Yin: "Eh. Probably ain't important. Plus they look better as twins." NewGods!Jin: "Too right. Also I can't remember which is the one we left." NewGods!Yin: "Me either."

I'm also reminded of that brief moment in Good Omens, where the Young parents see the accidental extra baby and are like "Yo, is that a twin?" and the nurse doing the antichrist-baby-swap panics like "Uhhh..."

The Jackpotshipping twins also don't know whos the "bonus" of the pair. The spell used to create a perfect copy of the bio baby is really powerful & rare and doesn't wear off like a hair-clone does. No way of knowing who was a freebie unless you ask Buddha himself.

[asknarashikari]

Wataru: Tell me why again on why we never let our husband be someone else's gym trainer.

Takaharu: I remember when he was my gym trainer. *remembers every detail of it* Yeah. I can see why now.

Azuma: He'll wear a crop top or gym tank and shorts. Go into his muscular form and try to flirt or the other way around.

Tametomo: Yeah. It was just plain dumb for him to play platonicly. The next thing you know, you're already hitched or, metaphorically speaking, pregnant.

Yanma: By the last part... it means you're already hitched with him, and when you two meet at the gym again... yeah. You're definitely getting preggers.

Wataru: Umm, hmm... that's our husband.

Azuma and Yanma: *looks* HEY! You're not choosing him as your gym trainer!

Me: *fell asleep in the middle of yoga*

Adult!Right: Huh? I thought...

Azuma and Yanma: Huh? OOOH... Nevermind.

Wataru: Welcome to the harem, late bloomer. Let's get moving.

Takaharu: Nothing to see here. You already know my husband's horny shenanigans. Move along!

Everyone else: *shrugs and moves along*

Later.

Adult!Right: Lost my V card! And better be expecting an uninvited guest.

Rest of ToQger: To whom?

Adult!Right: You already know who.

Them: ???

Adult!Right: *eye rolls* Tall, crystal crowned, cosmic body, a god, almost horny 24-

Ticket: We get it! We know who it is. You don't need to explain any further.

[thebluemoonjune]

The Elegance of Resilience Chapter 4: Knowing The Truth

Chapter 4: Knowing The Truth

Summary:

Michonne has a needed talk with Maggie. Rick learn's the truth about Judith.

"Rick?"

"Yeah, Chonne?"

"If our house started burning and everyone else, including me, the kids, and the rest of the family are safe, what would you take one last dash into the house to save?"

It was still early. The sun hadn't fully come yet, so the couple spent the time cuddling in bed. The atmosphere was serene and calming. With his lover's bizarre, but on-brand question, his lips pinched together in a hard line, unsure how to answer. He thought hard until he responded.

"My colt python."

"You would rather take a gun, than stuff like family photos?" Michonne arched an eyebrow in his direction.

Realising his mistake, his gears started turning. They'd been together for more than four years, his mother used to do it to his father. At this point, one would think he'd be able to navigate her traps.

It had to be a woman thing.

"Darling, now why would I do that when I know you'd take that stuff yourself? That's a waste of time just get nothing… Besides, my old man would kill me if I lost his gun. Don't want our kids fatherless now, do you?"

"Of course not, but I guess even the big, bad cowboy has an irrational fear of losing his damn gun."

"You mean that ain't normal?"

"It is if you're a cartoon character," said Michonne as her mouth split open wide in a booming laugh.

"Okay, little Miss Sunshine. Let me ask you one then…Which one of our friends is gonna survive an apocalypse…Hmm?"

"Daryl!"

"Daryl!"

"Grimes! You said it was my question!"

The two were in the mids of play-fighting when they heard a knock on their bedroom door.

"You stay; I'll get it."

Rick got up, and put on some bottoms, before heading to the door. Opening the door, he saw his younger cousin Maggie, knowing who it was for, he told her to wait a minute so Michonne could dress.

…

Meeting Maggie in her bedroom, Michonne carried herself to sit next to her on the bed.

"Hey"

"Hey"

"I hear you're preggers."

Both grinned and flushed as she tried to uplift the mood. They were silent for a bit.

"I'm not keeping it…I can't do this a third time; I just can't…"

"You're valid in feeling that way, Mags, but this isn't your decision alone… Glen should come back so you can work this out together."

"Why, so his parents can disown another of my children?"

"Maggie-"

"Do you know why he never takes us or the kids with him? It ain't business. Besides, I have my hands full with what I got."

"If that's true, Glen needs to make a decision; he can't have it both ways! The kids are the ones who suffer… I'm speaking from experience… He can't please everyone."

"I want more out of life…Everything I do is for my kids. I love them, but I don't recognise myself anymore… I don't know how much more of this I can take. I know I'm selfish…Everyone always tells me that, but I want more."

"Oh, Maggie."

"Your father calls you selfish, as in, 'Hey! The world doesn't revolve around you! You gotta live with your choices!' and he's right, which is why I'm making this decision... I'm tired, Mich."

"Life can get busy with work, kids, in-laws, family, and friends. You need to make sure you set aside some time to spend alone with your husband. Find a sitter for the kids, and clear a night or two to spend together. Focus on each other and discuss things that are important to you both."

"That's easier said than done."

"Which is why you just have to go for it! Look, I love my boys to the moon and back. I will always be there for them and Rick, but I have to be the best version of myself so I can be the best for them. Don't be afraid to ask for help…Shit, I wasn't with all this mess Rick has going on, and the pressure from my father. Do you think I would've made it this far if I hadn't done so? Think about what I said, Okay?"

"Okay."

"And have a talk with Herschel; tell him everything, Okay?"

"Okay."

And with that, Michonne left Maggie's room to go check on the kids. She and the boy left that night.

Two days later, it was the day. The day Rick would find out whether his daughter was his.

…

"I'll go with you. Let me be by your side."

She put her hand to his face to stare into his watery blue eyes. He stood motionless, attempting to digest what he had just heard. She held his face steady and pulled him towards her so their foreheads could touch. She waited patiently. Rick felt to himself that he was suffocating since he was terrified to breathe. Everything is open to change. Everything would change.

I need to calm down.

"I want you by my side. I need you there." His entire being seemed weighed down; his eyes were black and cupped by thick pouches.

"And I will be."

"I love you..."

"I love you more…"

…

They dropped the twins off at Sasha's, given that she was free, and they proceeded to court. They arrived approximately eight minutes prior to Lori, who'd been joined by Shane today. The two sides said nothing whilst they patiently awaited for the magistrate to make his entry in order to commence the spectacle that followed.

…

Things had been going on for almost an hour when it had reached the time to hear what everyone present wanted to know. A sickening wave of terror welled up in both Rick and Lori's bellies. Rick kept his head straight while Lori turned to look at him. Regardless of what she said to him, part of her still wanted him to be the father of their little girl. He was a good father, and she still loved him.

Michonne took his hand and rubbed his back to soothe him. The small hairs across his body stood on end.

.

"If the tested father is not the child's biological father, the results will be an exclusion of paternity. The probability of paternity, in this case, would be 0%, and the Statement of Results on the report will read,"

The magistrate opened the folder to read the results. His skin grew clammy, but, Michonne held his hand as tight as she could. Shane stroked Lori's back. As they waited for the reading to continue.

"The alleged father is excluded as the biological father of the tested child."

And with that, Rick's strength left his legs. Black spots form in his vision as though he is about to faint. Michonne wrapped her arm around him to hold him up to her small frame while his lawyer, Andrea, helped from the other side as his tears began to fall.

"Rick, baby, I'm here, I'm still with you. We're going to be okay; I promise."

"Mr Grimes, I can not possibly imagine what you are currently going through. Given that the paternity of the child in question has been established, The divorce between you and your wife should go smoothly after this, that being said, the two of you already have another child to think about. I expect that the two of you will do what is best for your son during this difficult transition in his life and there will be maturity on both sides given that the little girl knows the two of you as her parents. I wish you both well. Court dismissed."

…

She drove them to her villa. She didn't like to drive but had no choice given Rick had been in a daze since everything happened. She helped him inside, all the way to the downstairs, guest bedroom. He developed a high fever and whatever she gave him to eat or drink; he threw up. Knowing it was going to be a turbulent night, she called her cousin to hold her kids till tomorrow. As she finish the call, she noticed a few missed calls from her parents; four from her mother and one from her father. It was then that Michonne was reminded that her folks would arrive tomorrow. She look at her boyfriend and couldn't help but think,

Oh shit!

Her father would not care about Rick's mental state nor make things easy.

"I know this is hard, but you are so strong, baby; you're going to get through this. We will get through this together as a family!"

She laid next to him, holding her beloved in her arms. He nuzzled into her chest and cried as hard as he could. He hadn't cried like this since he'd been a boy his voice degenerated into a childish whimper. He felt better but was so embarrassed he didn't want to look at her. After going for so long he swallowed dryly, unable to wet his parched throat. Michonne stoked his soft dark hair waiting for him to move at his own pace.

Finally, looking up at her, she handed him a bottle of water with a gentle smile on her soft pretty face. He sat up turning away from her to drink still mortified at his actions. It didn't matter to her, she hugged him as snugly as she could manage, resting her head on his left shoulder.

He is so cute!

"You look like you just had an eureka moment. Your eyes are bigger than your head, Grimes."

"Flattering," said Rick.

Looking at a place somewhere over his shoulder, their eyes met, but he broke it off.

"What do I do now?"

"You move forward; we move forward."

"I know I got to, but that was my little girl…" His voice broke trying to choke the words out.

"I know it may seem cold but what the Magistrate said was both important and true. We have to pick up the pieces for Carl and Judith, for André and RJ too."

"I love you so much!"

"I love you too!"

Their eyes locked in a shared understanding as a tear strolled down both their faces. Closing his eyes Michonne pressed a soft kiss to his forehead as they lay down back on the bed, she caressed his back until he fell into a deep sleep in her warm arm.

…

…

…

…

N.B

This chapter is a little shorter.

Next chapter you guys will meet Daddy and Mommy Hawthorne

Hope you all enjoyed it.

[moths-wc-aus]

ok ok thoughts on the hypoparents au!

so!!!!! the new prophecy happens, yada yada, we start settling in the new territories. squirrelflight and tawnypelt suddenly find, uh oh! we can't stop thinking about each other!

(side note, one of my issues with bramblesquirrel is the age gap and i'm pretty open about that, BUT the difference between that and tawnysquirrel is that tawnypelt likely never met squirrelpaw until the beginning of the new prophecy, and in this au, had absolutely zero romantic interest until a) they both got to know each other and b) squirrelflight was a fully grown adult warrior able to consent and make her own choices. it's not as Yikes to me because with bramblesquirrel, brambleclaw knew her from the time she was basically a newborn, and with tawnysquirrel, tawnypelt only met her when she was almost grown up)

so squirrelflight and tawnypelt start meeting in secret. at some point hawkfrost successfully kills firestar, and brambleclaw becomes leader. it is important to mark that brambleclaw did NOT help hawkfrost, nor is he aware of what hawkfrost has done! he's an ass in this au, but not a villain. squirrelflight is mourning the shit out of her dad and starts feeling all icky and bloated and sleeping all the time, but that's like. normal for grief, right? oh, she's pregnant? OH FUCK, SHE'S PREGGERS?????

so she tells tawnypelt all panicky n shit, and tawnypelt is also panicking but is better at thinking through things under pressure, and tawny's like "uhhh fuck you're gonna start showing at some point. uhhh i know that there's an unspoken rule about not asking queens who their baby makers are, we could use that??? i mean. our relationship is KINDA illegal so…." and squilf goes "FUCK that!!! i do NOT want people whispering about our kits and making all kinds of shitty assumptions about their sire!!" and tawnypelt has this moment where she's completely blown over with love and is like [heart eyes] "our kits"

so they talk a little more and decide hey, bramblestar is tawnypelt's brother, they could probably ask him to pretend that he sired squilf's kits??? bramblestar has an Unexpected Huge Reaction of "CODE BREAKERS??? IN MY CLAN????? HELL NAW" and kicks squilf tf out, spilling the beans to literally everyone. so basically everyone around the lake is scandalized as fuck, and tawny and squirrel are both MORTIFIED and wondering "hey wtf just happened" (wtf just happened is that bramble and crow have been in their own super toxic hatefuck illegal relationship, and bramble figured that if he starts cracking down on cats who have cross-clan relationships, then no one would suspect HIM of having one!)

leafpool then has a vision of firestar and goes to squilf like "hey uhhhh dad is really pissed about this whole thing and has given you permission to like. start a new clan. i'd be willing to join btw!!! i just gotta figure out how my job would work…" and squilf is like "dope! i don't… particularly want to be leader?" and tawnypelt is like "mmm neither do i… BUT if i become leader i could be the best damn leader ever and piss off my dad, so i'll do it ig!"

some windclan cats who'd been against onestar catch wind of this and join, as do other cats who were in their own secret relationships! tawnystar becomes leader of galeclan with squirrelflight as her deputy and leafpool and mothflight as her healers, and the two mates have a healthy litter of three kits, named flamekit, hollykit, and lionkit! (they later have another litter, alderkit and rowankit!)

crowfeather ends up having his own kit (breezepelt) and cursing bramblestar's name for knocking him up. he refuses to say who breeze's sire is and no one wants to ask because he WILL throw the fuck down. bramblestar knows he's breeze's other dad, though crowfeather hasn't confirmed it. it's sort of up in the air on whether breeze knows that bramble is his other dad? neither have said anything, but sometimes breezepelt looks at bramblestar in a way that makes crow and bramble wonder…

and no, bramblestar hasn't approached breezepelt. he feels pretty awkward about the whole thing, and he didn't even know breezepelt existed until… oh, man, his fourth or fifth gathering as an apprentice, maybe? the point is, bramble doesn't know the kid and isn't sure if he actually wants to be in his life, so just… doesn't reach out. there's always a part of him wondering what it might be like to be a dad, though…

[correctrvbquotes]

Cut back to Doc, Andy, Church and Caboose

Doc: Hey guys? I've figured out what's wrong.

Church: What is it Doc?

Doc: You're not gonna like the diagnosis.

O'Malley: Hmhmhmhm which is ironic, because I think it's absolutely delightful, muhahahaha.

Church: Just tell us Doc, we can take it.

Doc: Your friend is-

Caboose: Dying? Oh no!

Doc: No, he's not dying, he just has-

Caboose: No chance to live. I knew it!

Church: Caboose? One more interruption outta you, and he's gonna have two patients.

Doc: How do I say this, your friend is ... ...

Church: Why are you pausing? Caboose is not gonna interrupt you this time.

Doc: No, that was just for dramatic effect. He's pregnant.

Caboose: Oh good. ...Wait what?

O'Malley: Hmhmhmhmhm, preggers, muahaha.

Church: Alright, are we paying for this service, because, if we are, I want a refund. And if we're not, I want a refund anyway.

Doc: No it's true, we found two heartbeats. So unless he has two hearts, the only logical explanation is that he's pregnant. ...I think.

Church: How is that a logical explanation? Alright, one of the two of you has some explaining to do.

Andy: Haha, don't look at me, Tucker's not my type.

Caboose: Pshah, me neither. And, uh maybe we should um have the doctor explain, uh just how, babies are made, yknow, uh, in case someone, in the group, uuh may not exactly know how... that... happens.

Church: Oh my God Caboose, shut up. Andy, blow up. Doc, you're fired, get outta here. I'm gonna go shoot Tucker.

O'Malley: No, you said we had to tell you what was wrong; you didn't say we had to be right, or that we had to fix him, you fool, hahahahaa, read the fine print, classic blunder. Hmhm.

Doc: First of all, I am right. And we are going to help him.

Church and O'Malley: What?

Doc: Look no-one's ever seen anything like this before. I don't know anything about what caused this, or how to help him, but with heart, and true determination, we can get him through this!

Church: Yeah we don't want heart and determination Doc. What we want is a degree. From an accredited medical institution.

Andy: Yeah. Or four years equivalent work experience!

Doc: (sigh). Come see for yourself.

Church: Fine.

Caboose: Uh, I think I need to stay here and guaaard this rock. From Tucker. Because I'm pretty sure that's how all this started.

Church: Alright, what's wrong. You seem nervous.

Caboose: What if Tucker is contagious? I do not want to catch pregnancy.

Church: Hey, no one is pregnant. And seriously, Caboose, when I get done with this... we gotta have a little talk man. There's a book I've got that we can read together.

Caboose: ...I'd like that.

O'Malley: Maybe you can have the bowling ball fill you in on some of the basics, hmhm. Let me get you started: there's three holes. Hahahahahahaaaaa.

Doc: Oh gross.

O'Malley: I meant in the bowling ball.

[sapphoshands]

8, 2, 38

8. Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

from The Undertow, a Grace & Frankie pre-series fic from 2017:

Frankie sniffs. "Don't want to ruin Robert's holiday, huh? Hey, no problem, just show up on deck in one of these tomorrow and he'll forgive and forget." She holds a black one-piece up against herself and glances down. It's got the kind of plunging neckline that only someone like Grace can pull off. "It's no shame to get a little upset tummy now and again. Not everyone can have the cast-iron digestion I do." Dropping the suit, she pats her midriff smugly. "Pretty sure I was a pirate in a past life. Or some kind of seaman, anyway." Seaman… seaman… Frankie looks at the discarded bikini, then up at Grace, who still has her arms crossed over her waist like she's protecting a secret. "Oh, sweet Sowathara," Frankie squeals, jumping across the room and throwing her arms around Grace. She squeezes tight, ignoring Grace's startled stiffness, and rocks them back and forth until she starts feeling a little mal de mer again herself. "Grace, are you knocked up?" "Frankie!" Grace says urgently, and Frankie pulls back just enough to see her startled face and the still-open door. "Yeah, of course, don't need to tell the whole boat – but oh, Grace, you're preggers! Congratulations! Does Robert know? What am I saying, of course he knows if you're puking all the time, hard to miss, right?" Frankie nudges Grace with an elbow, but gently, gently. Grace still looks a little stunned. Probably didn't expect anyone to guess so soon. She can't be far along – she's certainly not showing – but, well, Frankie just knows these things, she can't help it. She clasps Grace's hands in hers and beams up at her. "Have you two lovebirds been trying long?" she demands, steamrollering over Grace's attempts to answer. "We've been trying too, but don't say anything, Sol doesn't want anyone at the office to find out until there's something to share. Wouldn't it be fab if our kids grow up together?" Already Frankie's forgetting her dislike of Grace in the rosy picture she's spinning out. "Did you know when it happened? Some women say they can tell. What do you think, boy or girl? Position at conception makes a difference, of course. If you were on top, you're going to have a girl!" She winks. "Me and Sol, I guess we're just going to have to raise a whole brood of brilliant daughters."

i think my dialogue for G&F remains some of the best i have ever written! partly because jane fonda and lily tomlin created such incredible character voices that it's easy to capture and recreate them, partly because writing comedy is so fun, partly because frankie, especially, is just SO out there that coming up with things for her to say is an adventure in and of itself. i think i did a really good job of maintaining character voice in the internal narration, too, and i'm also pleased with how dialogue and narration have so many layers. i chose this fic partly because i think the dialogue is very funny, but in general i think the work i did for G&F is solid.

2 - answered already!

38. Talk about a review that made your day.

i love when people pull out sentences that move them, i love when people tell me they've come back to re-read, i love when people comment on voice and characterisation, but one of the greatest gifts is always...

:)

thanks!

[ask me more things]

[shuckinbeanz]

Spend Forever Next To You

Credit to the lovely rarainks for our daily bread. 🙏

warnings/notes: reader is preggers, Keigo is a gonna be a good papa bird, Hawks being a showoff if you squint, and just cuteness. Like Enji's, this is told in Keigo's POV, however this is pure tooth rotting fluff, unlike Enji's. No angst here! And you know the clattering sound a toucan makes? Its hard to explain, but I imagine (this is only one of many) Keigo's birdlike 'happy chitter' being similar in sound like 'clatter-er', but its much lower in volume and sounds deeper since it comes from his chest, almost sounding like a growl. Almost. <3

Is it just me or does his Japanese VA sound similar to the song?

MINORS 👏 DNI! 👏 AGE 👏 IN 👏 BIO 👏 OR 👏 DNI! 👏 Head on over to @candybowbeansies please for my SFW pieces, or be blocked if you interact here! 😇

~Masterlist~

he could spend forever next to you <3

His feathers puff up as he pumps blood into them, and they flutter as he cocoons himself in an attempt to keep warm from his perch on a high rooftop. Tonight was particularly chilly, and he disliked the cold. At least it was peaceful, for the time being.

But one feather was particularly warm tonight, thanks to you, like every other night since yours and his nth date, up to marriage and beyond. 'Hey, featherboy?' he could feel your vibrations, chuckling to himself. His little furnace. You were so damn sweet, he thought. You treated his feather like some family heirloom. He told you you didn't have to treat it so tenderly when you lost it one time-he'd told you they grow back.

But oh, did that backfire on his ass. You didn't let him hear the end of it for weeks, even if he did bring it back to you the same day you lost it. And never again did you lose it.

'I don't know if you're busy or not...' he sends you his own vibration in reply. He can feel your giggle. 'Okay, so you're not busy.'

You wanna know why?

It's because he made a point to keep it near you. It was his connection to you. Your connection to him. Colors bloom, he swears. Colors bloom in his chest at the thought-at the feeling.

He blinks lazily, feeling an off vibration elsewhere. He yawns, sending a few feathers to pick up a purse-snatcher, return the purse to its owner, and deliver the culprit to the slammer in one fell swoop.

'I found something out tonight.' he feels the smile in your voice. Your warmth. He procures his cellphone, adding yet another number to the list of apprehensions, this one another case of petty thievery. The precinct will wire through the needed details for the reports. 'I can't wait until you get home, so I'll come on out and say it.' he could feel your vibrations, picking up on another elsewhere. 'I'm pregnant.' Again, he sends out his feathers, this time to apprehend a would-be kidnapper on the streets, phone ready to add them into the list as his feathers return the crying child to their parents, delivering the next criminal to the local precinct. As soon as your vibrations register, he's coughing, some foreign yet familiar thing exploding in his chest. He adds the criminal to the list, his feathers making a speedy return as he saves the form, stepping off the rooftop. He sends in for his replacement patrol, speeding through the cold starry night sky to you.

You're pregnant. You're pregnant. You're pregnant.

The bird side of his brain was on pure cathartic overload. He needed to get back to you. To the nest. Instinct drove him. You and him-his sweet birdie-you were going to be parents. He knows its immature, but the things that raced through his mind, how the nursery would look, how many you would give him, girl or boy, how he'd be there to help you when you needed him, how he'd leave feathers for them to teeth on-racing up to their first time going to school, their first friend, and oh boy he knew they'd be a rebel like him, and he can't help but snicker. And oh, he'd set up a college fund for them now, before they were even born, but he knew he was going too fast. Take things slowly, he has to tell himself, only seconds away from the balcony, readying himself for a landing.

And with the thud of his boots, you open the balcony door on queue, stepping up to him for a hug. "I'm home, pumpkin." he says, flashing you a giddy grin, wrapping his arms and wings around you as you approach. You tiptoe to plant a brief kiss on his chin, the gesture eliciting a happy chatter from his chest. "Welcome home, baby." you say to him, giggling as he holds you closer.

[candybowbeansies]

Spend Forever Next To You

Credit to the lovely rarainks for our daily bread. 🙏

warnings/notes: reader is preggers, Keigo is a gonna be a good papa bird, Hawks being a showoff if you squint, and just cuteness. Like Enji's, this is told in Keigo's POV, however this is pure tooth rotting fluff, unlike Enji's. No angst here! And you know the clattering sound a toucan makes? Its hard to explain, but I imagine (this is only one of many) Keigo's birdlike 'happy chitter' being similar in sound like 'clatter-er', but its much lower in volume and sounds deeper since it comes from his chest, almost sounding like a growl. Almost. <3

Is it just me or does his Japanese VA sound similar to the song?

~Masterlist~

he could spend forever next to you <3

His feathers puff up as he pumps blood into them, and they flutter as he cocoons himself in an attempt to keep warm from his perch on a high rooftop. Tonight was particularly chilly, and he disliked the cold. At least it was peaceful, for the time being.

But one feather was particularly warm tonight, thanks to you, like every other night since yours and his nth date, up to marriage and beyond. 'Hey, featherboy?' he could feel your vibrations, chuckling to himself. His little furnace. You were so damn sweet, he thought. You treated his feather like some family heirloom. He told you you didn't have to treat it so tenderly when you lost it one time-he'd told you they grow back.

But oh, did that backfire on his ass. You didn't let him hear the end of it for weeks, even if he did bring it back to you the same day you lost it. And never again did you lose it.

'I don't know if you're busy or not...' he sends you his own vibration in reply. He can feel your giggle. 'Okay, so you're not busy.'

You wanna know why?

It's because he made a point to keep it near you. It was his connection to you. Your connection to him. Colors bloom, he swears. Colors bloom in his chest at the thought-at the feeling.

He blinks lazily, feeling an off vibration elsewhere. He yawns, sending a few feathers to pick up a purse-snatcher, return the purse to its owner, and deliver the culprit to the slammer in one fell swoop.

'I found something out tonight.' he feels the smile in your voice. Your warmth. He procures his cellphone, adding yet another number to the list of apprehensions, this one another case of petty thievery. The precinct will wire through the needed details for the reports. 'I can't wait until you get home, so I'll come on out and say it.' he could feel your vibrations, picking up on another elsewhere. 'I'm pregnant.' Again, he sends out his feathers, this time to apprehend a would-be kidnapper on the streets, phone ready to add them into the list as his feathers return the crying child to their parents, delivering the next criminal to the local precinct. As soon as your vibrations register, he's coughing, some foreign yet familiar thing exploding in his chest. He adds the criminal to the list, his feathers making a speedy return as he saves the form, stepping off the rooftop. He sends in for his replacement patrol, speeding through the cold starry night sky to you.

You're pregnant. You're pregnant. You're pregnant.

The bird side of his brain was on pure cathartic overload. He needed to get back to you. To the nest. Instinct drove him. You and him-his sweet birdie-you were going to be parents. He knows its immature, but the things that raced through his mind, how the nursery would look, how many you would give him, girl or boy, how he'd be there to help you when you needed him, how he'd leave feathers for them to teeth on-racing up to their first time going to school, their first friend, and oh boy he knew they'd be a rebel like him, and he can't help but snicker. And oh, he'd set up a college fund for them now, before they were even born, but he knew he was going too fast. Take things slowly, he has to tell himself, only seconds away from the balcony, readying himself for a landing.

And with the thud of his boots, you open the balcony door on queue, stepping up to him for a hug. "I'm home, pumpkin." he says, flashing you a giddy grin, wrapping his arms and wings around you as you approach. You tiptoe to plant a brief kiss on his chin, the gesture eliciting a happy chatter from his chest. "Welcome home, baby." you say to him, giggling as he holds you closer.

[cocosstories]

Pete Davidson One Shot

you and Pete are friends with benefits. Constantly hooking up and hanging out but he hasn’t made an effort to make things official and you’re to proud to ask. You get preggers and tell him he has to either get it together or get lost.

Three years ago you met Pete and became instant friends. You hung out all the time, so much so most people assumed you were dating. You both always laughed off the accusations saying, 'its not like that' or 'we are just friends'. No one really ever believed you, more often than not coming back with, 'not yet' or 'it'll happen someday'.

Everything changed one night though. You and Pete were hanging out in his basement like always. Nothing too exciting going on just another night of flipping through the channels and never agreeing on what to watch.

After a while, you came across 'Friends With Benefits' and stop.

"This movie is such crap. Like it wasn't obvious the movie was going to end with them getting together. Just proving everyone's bullshit point that guys and girls can't just be friends and hook up. I mean why do you have to make it into some romance?"

The whole premise of the movie bothered you. You never believed that just because you had sex with a guy, you would end up head over heels in love with him.

"So what you're saying is if we were to start up a friends with benefits thing and fuck right now, you wouldn't end up falling for me?"

You roll your eyes at him.

"You wish."

He chuckles.

"Care to test that theory?"

You smack his shoulder.

"Are you crazy? I am not having sex with you Pete!"

"What? Afraid you'll fall in love me?"

He gives you his best sweet and innocent look.

"No. Afraid you'd fall in love with me."

You say matter of factly.

Pete scoffs.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. So damn sure of yourself huh?"

He says before grabbing a tickling you as you scream and laugh.

"Pete! Stop! I hate being tickled!"

Before long, he has you pinned down on the couch, hovering over you.

He stops tickling you and looks at you for a moment before leaning down and kissing you.

You were about to protest until he deepens the kiss and you give in.

That was one year ago and you and Pete have been hooking up randomly since. Both swearing there were no romantic feelings on either side.

You are now sitting in your bathroom on the edge of the tub waiting for the timer to go off. Your hands are shaking and you feel more nauseous than before.

After what feels like an eternity, the timer dings and you look at the little white stick on your sink.

"Fuck."

The pink plus sign was like a punch to the gut, knocking all of the air out of your lungs.

Your mind was racing, how were you going to tell Pete? What was he going to say? How were you two going to raise a baby?

You are brought out of your thoughts when you hear a knock on your front door.

Sighing, you pull yourself up and go to the front door.

"Hey, Pete"

You open the door and let him in.

"Hey, Y/N, you good?"

Pete asks noticing you are a bit pale.

You go to answer him but are hit with a wave of nausea and run to the bathroom.

You finish throwing up and turn towards the sink finally realizing Pete had followed you into the bathroom.

He stands silently staring down at the pregnancy test in his hands.

"Pete I can explain..."

"You're pregnant?"

Pete looks up at you as you nod silently.

"Shit."

He says before walking out of the bathroom, going out on the fire escape and lighting up a joint.

You follow him out a minute later.

"That's all you have to say? I'm pregnant, you say shit and go smoke a joint? Are you serious?"

You get a little heated when you find him.

"What am I supposed to say Y/N? I just found out! Give me a fucking minute to process it Jesus fucking Christ!"

He yells back, upsetting you even more.

"A minute to get high as shit and block out reality maybe. God Pete, you need to grow the hell up! You can't just smoke weed and fuck around all the time! I don't want to raise this kid alone but I don't want to have take care of two kids. You need to make a choice are you going to grow up, act your age and be a father or walk away and continue wasting your life? You can't have it both ways."

Your words were harsh but true and Pete knew it. He just wasn't ready to admit it yet. He comes back in from the fire escape and heads right for the front door.

"Where are you going?"

You ask as he reaches for the door knob.

"I need some time to think."

Was all he said before walking out your front door.

It had been three months since you found out you were pregnant. Three months since Pete found out and three months since he walked out your front door saying he needed to think.

You had nearly come to terms with the fact that you were going to be a single mom and raise your baby alone.

It hadn't been easy, your morning sickness was horrible, most of the time you were unable to get out of bed.

You also missed Pete like crazy. Sure, you were mad at him for leaving the way he did and not even calling but he was still your best friend.

Its around midnight and you climb into bed, exhausted from a busy day at work.

Just as you are about to drift off, there is a knock at your door. You get up to answer it, wondering who the hell could be here so late.

You open it to find Pete.

"Hey."

He says with a small smile. You notice he looks alot healthier than the last time you saw him.

"Hey? After three months all you can say is hey?"

The anger boils up in you as you speak.

"Look, Y/N, I'm sorry. I know its been a while but I took what you said to heart. I knew that if I wanted to be in your life, in our kids life I needed to do something to prove to you that I could change. I haven't smoked since that night. I got rid of all of it."

You tear up as he speaks.

"Really?"

Pete nods.

"Of course. Y/N, I want to be a part of this. I want my kid to know its father. I just knew that until I cleaned up my act, I wasn't ready for it but now I am."

Your hand moves down to your small but evident baby bump, Pete's eyes following your movement.

"Wow, can I um...would it be ok if I uh..."

He stutters causing you to smile and take his hand, placing it on your bulging belly.

"There's really a baby in there. Were going to have a son or daughter."

He says in amazement.

"Daughter actually."

You correct him and his eyes widen.

"Its a girl?"

Pete asks as you nod.

"So, can we start over and maybe try to be a family?"

You take his hand and lead him into your bedroom, pulling him into your bed and cuddling up with him before giving your answer.

"Yes, Pete. We can."

[rurpleplayssims]

Tyler was both surprised and not surprised to see Roselyn with Zoey.

In fact, ever since Zoey had revealed that her best friend had painted her in her underwear, Tyler had wondered about Roselyn's intentions towards his ex-fiancé.

There was a degree of intimacy between the two females and Tyler wasn't blind to it.

He did believe that Zoey herself didn't have any romantic feelings towards her friend and that she was clinging to any support in her pregnancy.

But Tyler was starting to doubt that Roselyn had just friendly feelings for Zoey.

They must think I'm stupid, Tyler thought as he walked past, deliberately not stopping to speak to the pair of them.

However he was pissed off to see that neither of them appeared to spot or stop and say hi to him.

He was the father of Zoey's baby for goodness sake, he should have some say in her welfare.

You wanted an out, an annoying voice in the back of his head told him.

You didn't want anything to do with that child and it cost you your relationship with its mother. Zoey might say she'll forgive me but she's the fool. She doesn't know what you're truly like. You're no better than your own dad that ran out on you and your mother after he'd had enough of verbally abusing you all the time. You've made that bed. Get to lying in it dude and shut up complaining.

"How are you Preggers?" Roselyn asked playfully. "You ready to pop yet?"

Zoey sniggered at the new nickname Roselyn had given her lately.

"Well I don't want to vomit all the time which is a plus!" Zoey replied. "Unless anyone burps in front of me!"

"Hmm, my table manners aren't the best!" Roselyn chuckled.

She'd clocked Tyler walking past but to her own comfort, Zoey hadn't spotted Tyler walking past as she was too focused on speaking to Roselyn.

She felt quite territorial over her friend.

Go away Tyler, she thought without giving away anything in her face or tone. You leave my girl alone or you'll have me to deal with!

"So, what did you want to do today?" Roselyn asked.

"Want to play a game on the console?"

"It's not much of a challenge when I know I'd win!" Zoey said, rolling her eyes.

"It's very dangerous to bed against a Young sister!" Roselyn warned herself, waggling her finger at her friend, her eyes becoming tender as she looked at Zoey.

I can't even get playfully mad at her, man I am screwed!

"Is that what you told Jed before he beat you at chess!"

"Hey! How'd you know about that?!" Roselyn yelped in disbelief.

Zoey burst out laughing which only set Roselyn off.

[fanficwritersworld]

Headcannons about my OC

A/N: My OC's name is Emma Ní Chroídheán, she'd from our world in Ireland and ended up in smallville but has no reconlection of what's supposed to happen. She is massive superhero nerd and likes Jordan Kent. She is played by Odessa Adlon. And i am bored and need to info dump

Enjoy the shitshow that his my 2nd most unhinged OC

So inspired by the feralnette au

In Her World

She definetly has a giant jumper that says 'WE STAN LOIS LANE IN THIS HOUSEHOLD'

Like if anyone in her house says Lois is just a side character/love intrest they about to feel her wrath

The reason she's always out with either her cousins or bestie (whom are all male) is becuase they stop her from destroying Cork City

Everyone in her old school think her and her bestie Jordan are dating even tho he's gay with her cousin Adam

She's in an all boy's school due to the fact her birth mother has a reputation and the other school's wouldn't take her

There is one teacher that just hates Emma

Like he teaches music and english, but emma somehow always makes his lessons about Superheros

Women in History? Lois Lane fucking exsists motherfucker

Black History Month? Iris West-Allen, Kelly Olsen, Ryan Wilder, Nora West-Allen need she go on?

He also hates how every song she preforms is somehow related to DC or Marvel

Emma loves getting on his nerves since he's homophobic and hates her and her bestie Jordy

Calls him a homophobic, uneducated imbecil and the regular

Academically Emma is a star student. Behaviour wise is a different story completely

She gets more dentetions than the school drug dealers and had only gone to a handful of them

Is in her last year of Secondary School after skiping two years

Her and her cousins causing havoc during lunch is the highlight of hte 1st years day

She adopts most of the younger kids in her school

One day Jorday told her there was a kid being bullies by a thrid year and that girl ran down three flights of stairs to beat him up

she then brought the little kid to the school chill out room for a cuppa

she adopted that child faster than barry can fuck the timeline up

She has like a miny army of children aged 12-17 and she's 16

If the principal can't get the school's attention during assemblies he asks Emma to help

Emma just rgabsa mic and says 'I'm not doing good guys and you lot are giving me a headache'

silence

She's the princess of the school

No one needs to worry about her getting preggers cuase she's ace and no one there is her type

'Wait Emma who is your type?' 'Fictional characters'

On Valentines day she has to deal with students givng her superhero themed poems and treats

Half these idoits don't even know the difference between Marvel and DC

'Are you Supergirl? 'Cause I can be your Superman'

Emma punched the guy who gave it to her for the mentally disturbing shit that is now stuck in her head

She's friends with most of the teachers and mostly the SNA's (Teaching Assisants of sorts)

See as they'e mostly women too, they always help Emma out

Like they allow them to make tiktoks when waiting on a teacher or even take her out of class to relax her

Speaking of relaxing,

Emma is the definition of trauma

So when she's getting overwhelmed or is really off-balance their is a room designated for her to let all that out

What is this room?

A screaming room

Yep this bitch screams to let out her problems when she can't go to her threapist straight away

Liek she would go into the room for a like a full class (40mins) and then when music rolls around her voice is perfectly intact

Shouldnt have been a clear sign she wasn't from the universe but hey

In the Arrowverse

She absolotley calls Clark sourwolf when he has a netrual face. He still has no idea what the fuck she's on about

Definetly calls Sam out on his BS

"Jesus Christ above in heaven! Is there not one universe where you're not a dick! I prefer the NCIS: New Orleans version of the crap!"

Cue Kent-Lane family confusion

She fangirls over Kara because it's fucking Supergirl

"My favourite kryptonian? Is here? In Smallville?" She faints

Sad puppy Jordan cause Kara's her favourite

Emma calls Jon a douche over the chain

they actually become like best friends but she'll never admit it

Consantly watching her words around Lois becuase Emma knows that Lois can and will destroy her with two syllables or less

She calls Jordan 'Jord' because it's suits him more than Jordy who is her bestie and practical brother

Only Jordan can call her Em, no one else. Sam tried...

'If you ever call me Em, I will slit your throat while you sleep'

Emma's old tiktok is found in the Arrowverse

She hates Jon for finding it somehow

You know those tiktoks where its 'when they're from earth or the older sibling' but with slow music and dancing, then it changes to 'when they're an alien or the younger sibling' with fast dancing?

Jon spots Jordan in the little collage and secretly teases Emma for days

There's alos tiktok her brother filmed asking emma who her type is

'Emmy? What's your type in a guy? Or girl' 'Curly hair. Some sort of mental issue. Has a cute face'

Jordan gets a confidence boost while Emma is planning Jon's murder outloud

Emma bashes Clark for 'abondoning' Kara when she got to Earth

Lois agrees with her

Emma is no longer allowed to any Morgan Edge related functions becuase of the first time she met the idiot

She hates him so much and it pains her to not know why fully

Emma is always freaking Clark out by saying Superman facts that haven't happened in the Arrowverse

'So, you are completely sure that Lex didn't make a genetic clone of you with his DNA?' 'Yess Emma' 'Awww :( I wanna meet Conner'

'Oh yeah there's a kryptonite that makes ya gay! It just wouldn't work on me'

She knows about Crisis and Clark adn Lois beg her no to tell the boys

'You honeslty think I would tell Jordan that the only reaason he exsists is because the universe reset? I know I'm mean but not cruel'

It's becuase she has a massive crush on him

After conasant asking she snaps and lets out some of the family's other lives

'You were the wife of a modern they a grimm reaper!' points at Lois

'You were a sour werewolf that all my foster sisters where fucking simping over when shirtless!' points at Clark

'You were a fucking arsonist!' points at Jon

She hesiates with Jordan for a moment before walking up to him and whispering in his ear 'You were in the peanuts movie'

that information is between Emma, Jordan and fucking Clark's superhearing!

Somehow by magic, Emma finds a very peculiar item of clothing that she made back home

'Okay listen. I made it for my Junior Cert Home Ec CBA, do not laugh'

She pulls out a black leather jacket with the back designed 'Don't Mess With The-' and the superman crest in sticthed almost perfectly

Jon loses it completely, liek on the floor laughter.

Everyone knew that Emma was a fangirl but that took the cake

'I thought Kara was your favourite?' Lois asked

Emma goes red

'WELlleLp. This is actually a... Super....boy jacket'

Jordan goes beet red

Clark holds back his shock

Jon is dying of laughter

Lois smirks like she has all the information in the world

'Superboy?' She has such a cocky grin

"Technically it's Conner Kent's early 2000's supersuit but seeing as he doesn't exsist...'

'You are such a nerd... This is priceless' Jon cackles

'I'm sorry did you have less than three weeks to make this? Do you not know how hard it is to sew leather!? Show some respect Jon, I bet you couldn't draw that crest for the life of you' Emma screams at him

Jordan actually likes it and is so impressed by Emma's skills

Later that night he asks if he can try in on

It was kinda small but Emma took a photo with him and that is now her screen saver on her phone

'You wear it' Jordna states

Emma shakes her head 'Not tonight pretty boy now out I'm tired'

The next day she wears a full closet cosplay of Conner Kent's superboy but has her hair curled for Jordan

That boy fell for her even more

Also she wholehearlt quotes @reddpanda from tiktok on the daily that causes teh entire twon of smallvile concerned for her mental health

[shuckinbeanz]

Sweet Boi

Credit to the lovely bobafiish for our daily bread! 🙏

warnings/notes: reader is preggers, deku IS a sweet boi, he's such a heartthrob, ya'll are married, blushy boi, ya'll serenade him the song 💞 this is similar to Toshibear's (not me plagiarizing my own work) and shorter than Tama-tan's but its still sweet, so...

Underage characters are Aged Up!

MINORS 👏 DNI! 👏 AGE 👏 IN 👏 BIO 👏 OR 👏 DNI! 👏 Head on over to @candybowbeansies please for my SFW pieces, or be blocked if you interact here! 😇

~Masterlist~

tall n gentle beneath the cut <3

"Tall and gentle, too hot to handle. You're all I want~" you begin to sing to your husband who was eating across your table for two. You could see his pretty green eyes widen at you before he shyly averts his gaze. "You're all that I want~" you sing, as he continued to eat. You could see that flush starting on his cheeks. "Ooh, baby~" you sing. He was so easy to fluster, it was adorable. "Sweet as nectar, honey suckle~" you sing.

"You make everything so fun. Oh, boy~" you hum, "My sweet boy~" you sing, smiling as he chuckles softly, his lips curling up into a smile. "Hey, you got a smile so bright," you sing, his smile and the flush on his cheeks growing. "Your pearls be making me so blind." you sing. He reaches a hand across the table, and you reach to take it. "Oh, you sugar coat your words, just to make sure that I don't get hurt." you say, intertwining your fingers with his larger and more calloused ones. "You make me higher than a sire, treat me like royalty." you say, all his attention on you, now. "Do me a favor?" you ask, lifting his hand. "And just take me away." you say, kissing his knuckles.

He hums softly, thumbing your hand affectionately. "Tall and gentle, too hot to handle. You're all I want~" you sing, giving his hand a careful squeeze. "You're all that I want~" you sing. "Don't you know, baby?" you sing. "Sweet as nectar, honey suckle~" you sing. "You make everything so fun." you hum. "Oh, boy~" you sing softly, "My sweet boy~" you sing.

For a few minutes, time is spent just holding hands. Admiring your husband's smile. His sweet flush. " 'zuku?" you call, softly. 'Mhmm?' he hums in reply. " 'm pregnant." you tell him. His following expression was absolutely comical, and you couldn't resist laughter. "Pre--?!" he gasps, "Pregnant?!" he exclaims, "You're pregnant?!" he asks, and you nod. "Oh, babe!" he exclaims, standing up to round the table and then kneel before you. He touches your stomach, gingerly, wearing the goofiest smile on his face. "This is such good news!" he exclaims, tears in his eyes. "Yup, uh-huh!" you agree, tearfully and wholeheartedly, bending a bit to share a sweet kiss with him.

[candybowbeansies]

Sweet Boi

Credit to the lovely bobafiish for our daily bread! 🙏

warnings/notes: reader is preggers, deku IS a sweet boi, he's such a heartthrob, ya'll are married, blushy boi, ya'll serenade him the song 💞 this is similar to Toshibear's (not me plagiarizing my own work) and shorter than Tama-tan's but its still sweet, so...

Underage characters are Aged Up!

~Masterlist~

tall n gentle beneath the cut <3

"Tall and gentle, too hot to handle. You're all I want~" you begin to sing to your husband who was eating across your table for two. You could see his pretty green eyes widen at you before he shyly averts his gaze. "You're all that I want~" you sing, as he continued to eat. You could see that flush starting on his cheeks. "Ooh, baby~" you sing. He was so easy to fluster, it was adorable. "Sweet as nectar, honey suckle~" you sing.

"You make everything so fun. Oh, boy~" you hum, "My sweet boy~" you sing, smiling as he chuckles softly, his lips curling up into a smile. "Hey, you got a smile so bright," you sing, his smile and the flush on his cheeks growing. "Your pearls be making me so blind." you sing. He reaches a hand across the table, and you reach to take it. "Oh, you sugar coat your words, just to make sure that I don't get hurt." you say, intertwining your fingers with his larger and more calloused ones. "You make me higher than a sire, treat me like royalty." you say, all his attention on you, now. "Do me a favor?" you ask, lifting his hand. "And just take me away." you say, kissing his knuckles.

He hums softly, thumbing your hand affectionately. "Tall and gentle, too hot to handle. You're all I want~" you sing, giving his hand a careful squeeze. "You're all that I want~" you sing. "Don't you know, baby?" you sing. "Sweet as nectar, honey suckle~" you sing. "You make everything so fun." you hum. "Oh, boy~" you sing softly, "My sweet boy~" you sing.

For a few minutes, time is spent just holding hands. Admiring your husband's smile. His sweet flush. " 'zuku?" you call, softly. 'Mhmm?' he hums in reply. " 'm pregnant." you tell him. His following expression was absolutely comical, and you couldn't resist laughter. "Pre--?!" he gasps, "Pregnant?!" he exclaims, "You're pregnant?!" he asks, and you nod. "Oh, babe!" he exclaims, standing up to round the table and then kneel before you. He touches your stomach, gingerly, wearing the goofiest smile on his face. "This is such good news!" he exclaims, tears in his eyes. "Yup, uh-huh!" you agree, tearfully and wholeheartedly, bending a bit to share a sweet kiss with him.

[candybowbeansies]

Oh, So Lovely, Loving You

warnings/notes: reader is preggers, ya'll are so in love its adorbs, like literally hearts for eyes, ofc ya'll are married, cute nickname for him cuz why not, tooth rotting fluff, Tama-tan being a precious bean we all must protecc. this is shorter than I would have liked, but....its still cute, trust me! ya'll have sweet moments.

Underage characters are Aged Up!

~Masterlist~

just cuteness beneath the cut!~ <3

It was a warm afternoon, and you and your husband were lounging on the balcony, soothing tunes playing softly inside, each of you reading your favorite books. The sliding balcony door was cracked open enough to hear the music hum in the background along with the occasional breeze which swept across the both of you.

You knew for some time now, that you were pregnant with your husband's child. You had planned to tell him tonight, choosing to bask in his presence, cuddled up right beside him.

You were so engrossed in your book, when you could hear his soft chuckle, as he moves to rest his cheek against the crown of your head.

"So if you don't know what you need, you can leave it all to me. Don't want you worried 'bout a thing, I know you'd do the same for me..." you hear him sing softly, and you giggle, noticing that he was singing along with yours and his song that was playing in the background. "'Cause you're so lovely, you're so lovely~" you sing along as well, out of habit. "I can't help but fall for you, love, when you love me, it's so lovely loving you~" you sing, placing a bookmark on the page you left off on. You turn your head and he lifts his, then you plant a kiss on his jaw, eliciting soft laughter from him. A soft flush on his sunkissed face, he bends to kiss your lips softly.

"So lovely loving you~" he sings, wrapping his arm firmly around you in a hug. For a short while, you two just enjoy each other's embrace, staring off into the horizon.

"Hey, jitterbug?" you hum your husband's nickname, and he hums back contentedly. "You know...I was planning to tell you tonight, but..." you trail off, and you can feel him shift away a little to give you room, his arm still around you.

Children were talked about. If anything, he wanted them. This you knew.

"I think now's a good time." you say, glancing up to him shyly. He gives you a gentle, reassuring squeeze. You smile softly, before lifting your gaze up to his.

"Tamaki, I'm pregnant." you tell him with a smile, giggling as his jaw drops. "Wh-Wha--?" soft gasps escapes him as he fumbles with his book he nearly drops-managing to close it and set it aside, a heartwarming, trembling smile gracing his lips. "Tha-That's good!" he stutters, wrapping his other arm around you as well, "Mhm~" you hum as he starts to blabber, "This is good news! I-It makes me so happy, our love, it--h-have you told anyone else, yet?" stuffing you against his chest, and you could only shake your head no. "We should tell Mirio the news. A-And Nejire! And-" he begins listing off familiar names, his tight hold loosening up. You take the chance to pull away and silence him with a kiss, your hands on his cheeks. He stiffens, releasing a cute noise in the back of his throat.

Moments later, you could feel him relax, melting into the kiss with a sweet hum.

Your husband was oh, so lovely. He was sweet, kind, supportive, loving, caring.

You both pull away from the kiss.

He made you feel whole.

He gently ushers you up. You could tell he had the same idea as you.

And regardless if you knew it, or not, you made him feel whole, too.

You both head inside, leaving your books and tea behind for the time being as he closes the sliding door behind him, then the blinds, before joining you in bed for a cuddle session.