#Hopefully tomorrow I can at least get something to help me sleep more...

[arionawrites]

1. it’s my 24th birthday today, so my goal of being published by the time i’m 25 is now a one year looming monster, but i never specified what kind of published and am currently looking in various literary magazines that are recommended for writers who have yet to be published, so i’m surprisingly confident that i can make it work? and tbh even if whatever i write isn’t officially published before my 25th birthday, if i have someone in the process of being published then i’ll be happy!! no matter what though, i’m gonna try to be proud of myself for at least giving it my best shot!!

2. i honestly love that my birthday is on the ides of march because the ides of march meme shitposting is only a thing on tumblr but it also being my birthday makes it easier to like. be excited about the ides of march outside of tumblr. like even in person i can be like “it’s my birthday! i’m an ides of march babe (:” and if someone is like oh what’s that? or if they say something along the lines of oh like julius caesar? i can be like yep!! and even if it’s a small thing outside of tumblr it brings me immense enjoyment and amusement being able to bring it up off of tumblr

3. transportation situation has been very rough since june 2023 when i totalled my car, my gap insurance are being assholes and i ended up putting my foot down on the phone with them yesterday which i’m pretty proud of because i am NOT a confrontational person (something i’ve been working on this past year, so seeing some improvement with my ability to hold my ground and not be a pushover yesterday was very cool!!) i was told i’d get a response from them by friday next week no matter what, and if i don’t then friday of next week i will continue to wreak havoc upon them. but my moms car which i’ve been using since my accident broke down yesterday, hopefully it’s fixable but my parents were saying it might be done for, so trying to think of how i’m gonna get to work next week is kind of stressing me out lmao, but for now i’m just gonna focus on enjoying my birthday the best i can because i don’t want to start off being 24 with an overwhelming anxiety for something that won’t be a potential issue until monday. plus i already messaged my boss today to let her know that i’m going to do everything i can to make it work out but just so she’s in the loop and knows of the potential of me not being able to make my morning shifts (one of my coworkers said she’s more than happy to give me a ride for our afternoon shifts which does help relieve some of the stress!) and i told her i’d let her know for sure sunday so that if necessary she can have time to figure out someone to fill in for me in the mornings!

overall: life is weird and i ended being 23 yesterday with a shitty situation but a positive outlook and i am going to enjoy my first day of being 24 no matter what because honestly i fucking earned it. happy friday everyone, i hope it’s a good day for you and me both!

[smirk47]

...

[playingdxngerous]

Relaxation Break

Word Count: 2.4k

Rating: 18+ MINORS DNI!!!

Warnings: smut, hand kink, unprotected p in v, oral m! and f! receiving, digital penetration f! receiving, some teasing, use of the word sir, some pet names, shared hotel room, cussing, spencer reid x reader, begging, probably some more small ones that i'm forgetting, me actually not proofreading whatsoever

first spencer reid fic, be nice to me guys

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Sharing hotels with the BAU team was something you easily got used to as the job went on. You usually like to bunk with another girl, not wanting to have an awkward experience with someone like Gideon, for example. However, tonight will be different. With Garcia coming along this time, you have no other choice but to share a room with one of the men. You decide to stay with Spencer, feeling as if it would maybe be less awkward than Hotch. Hopefully, at least...

He unlocks the door and lets you walk in first, observing the room with every step you take. Two beds. Thank God.

"Care if I take the bed next to the lamp?" Spencer asks from beside you as he double checks the locked door.

"No, I don't care," you smile, trying to spark some form of emotion rather than the blank, quiet stares you share.

"Okay great," he replies, immediately setting his stuff down. You walk into the bathroom and wash your face, getting ready for bed. You walk out in sweatpants and a tank top, surprised to see Spencer is also dressed in comfier clothes. You've never seen this side of him, nor did you know it even existed. He's sitting criss cross, staring intently at the files in front of him.

"I'm going to try to sleep, we have a big day tomorrow," you say in a yawn.

"Is it okay if I keep the lamp on for a bit?" He asks innocently with a rasp in his voice. You like it a little more than it should, and it really surprises you. You've always thought Spencer was cute, but you never saw it any more than just admiring from afar. You've never pictured any form of relationship, or even touch with him. Especially when it comes to the two of you sharing a room. This is foreign land to you, and for some reason you can't help but let your mind wander further into it. You look at the grip on his black pen, his veins popping out with each quick movement. Heat rises in you, yet you force yourself to keep it in control. Not tonight. You are not falling for Dr. Spencer Reid tonight.

"Yeah of course, do whatever you need to do Dr. Reid." Did you really just say that out loud? You force a slight chuckle, masking the flirty sarcasm in your voice.

"Oh, that's sir to you actually. Don't forget I'm a professor too." He smirks with his comment.

"Whatever smarty pants," you say to lower the mood of the conversation. Not tonight. You are not falling tonight.

"Mhm..." he mumbles before focusing his attention back to the folders in front of him.

"Night," you say, covering your face with the covers to block out the bright light.

"Night," you hear him say from outside of the sheets. The white blankets don't do much to hide the light from you, which slightly aggravates you. This is definitely not something to look forward to after a long day of profiling a killer. You toss and turn for what feels like forever until you're all tangled up in the sheets. With an abrupt movement you throw them off of you and blow the hair out of your face.

"Is something wrong? A nightmare?" He asks worriedly.

"No not that. I haven't slept yet. Do you mind to maybe turn the light off? I understand you probably have a lot to do but it's okay to take a break sometimes. You can't let this job take over every part of your life." You pause and loudly sigh. "It's kind of worrying. You deserve the same amount of rest as everyone else in the branch. You don't need all of this hard work placed on you."

"I don't mind. I chose this job because I knew I could handle it. I'll be okay."

"Spencer..." you whisper to almost nothing.

"Maybe I can do the work in the hallway or in the bathroom or something. I want you to be able to rest. I'm sorry, I didn't know I was bothering you or-" He rambles on before you cut him off.

"Spencer no," you say as you walk over to his bed. You gently place the files to the side in an organized manner so as to not mess up his work. He looks at you in silence, his puppy dog eyes becoming strangely hard to ignore. You grab his hand, and he slightly flinches.

"I'm sorry I forgot you probably don't like that." You apologize and quickly pull away.

"It's okay, I honestly didn't mind."

"Are you sure?" You bewilder. He nods.

"Look Spence...," you take a deep breath. "I know you have a ton of work, but you deserve to take a break for once in your life. Let that be tonight. Get some good sleep for once. Wake up energized to finish the files."

"No one calls me that." He smiles. "I think I like it, to be honest."

"What happened to sir?" You laugh and grab his hand again. This time he doesn't pull away.

"Oh, you know." He shrugs his shoulders. "I guess you're not one of my students so it's cool."

'I'll still call you sir if you like', your mind threatens to say. However, for right now at least, this thought must be kept to yourself.

"Well, that's beside the point. I just want you to know that it's okay to relax sometimes," you actually do say.

"I don't really know how." He responds, giving you trouble deciding what to say back. You run your thumb along his hand, admiring every little perfection about it. He looks down to see for himself, and his breath slightly hitches at the commotion. You squeeze his other hand with your free one, causing him to meet your gaze once more. This time way closer than the last. Inches lay between your faces. His warm breath blows onto you, proving the closeness between you. He seems to finally be catching on to you as his eyelids only remain halfway open. Afraid to make a move, the two of you sit in silence wondering if he feels the same as you.

"I can try to help you," you whisper just loud enough for him to hear.

"Yeah?" He asks, his voice almost a whimper. He has definitely caught on. For a man who rarely even shakes hands with other people, he seems to love the attention you are now giving him. You squeeze his hands harder, admiring the way they tower over yours in size. He mimics your thumb movement, slightly going back and forth. Definitely caught on. Thankfully.

"Yeah." You slightly lean in, lips parted ever so softly. He follows your movement, not yet making contact with you. After what feels like forever, you decide to take control and simply peck his lips to see how he reacts. Once again he follows you, pulling away right after you do.

"I-" he pushes out in a stutter, his eyes wide and his face red. You smile as he swallows anxiously.

"Everything okay Spence?" You smirk, eyes slightly closed still.

"Yeah." He clears his throat and licks his lips. Silence barges in once again, the room filled with blushes and clandestine stares. Out of nowhere, your starving lips collide with his quickly. He slides his tongue over your bottom lip, forcing him inside of you. His change in demeaner surprises you to your core. Never in your job have you seen Spencer Reid so full of life and action. He moves quicker than ever, desperate to be as close to you as possible. He grabs your jawline, your pussy wet at the thought of what his hands probably look like again your soft skin. He moves back to your neck, grabbing a handful of hair to push you closer. He tastes sweeter with each kiss, driving you absolutely rabid

"Jesus Christ, Spencer, you're so different right now."

"Is that a bad thing?" His swollen pink lips ask. You can't move your gaze away from them.

"Not at all." You say and hurriedly go back into the kiss. After a few moments you pull away and stare into his dilated pupils as your brain seems to stop functioning. Arousal takes over the both of you.

"Just to be clear, how far are you wanting to go?" He asks.

"Wherever you take me." You say weakly.

"Just tell me if you need to stop, okay?"

"Yes sir." You smirk. Found his weakness. He rolls his head back and licks his lips, his adams apple moving as he swallows gently.

"I've never done this before, I'm sorry if-" He begins before you shut him up with a short kiss.

"Spence, you don't know how long I've looked at you in awe, forcing away my thoughts of seeing you on top of me. Fucking me until I can't breathe. Worshipping you." You breathe out.

"I never thought I'd enjoy this as much as I am."

"Let's make it even better." You say as you climb on top of him, pushing him against the pillows parallel to the bedframe. Your lips meet his again, this time neater than the last. You bite his bottom lip as you pull away, dragging it with you. You crawl down to his waistband, teasingly putting your fingers underneath it.

"Can I?" You ask.

"Wait. You first." He lifts up your chin with his index finger.

"Me?"

"Is there a problem with that darling?" His words echo in your mind. Darling, darling, darling. His darling. All his. No one else.

"No, just usually men don't care about the women's pleasure. I assumed you'd want me to suck you off first."

"Well, I personally care very much. I'm fucking dying to taste you." You've never heard Spencer curse before, and you've sure been missing out.

"Please do baby." You moan.

"On your back. Now." He says strictly. You love this side of him more than anything. You follow his rules and lay on your back as he looks at you in hunger.

"May I?" He holds the waistband to your pants in his perfect hands.

"Yes," you nod.

"Yes what?"

"Please Spencer."

"Yes what."

"Yes sir."

He finally pulls down your sweatpants, your soaked panties still on. He eyes them down, sliding one finger up the crease.

"You're so wet for me sweetheart."

"Spencer you're being so different. Ten minutes ago you would have passed out if I were almost naked in front of you. What's changed?"

"You think I haven't waited ages to touch you?" Oh.

"I don't understand. You're so much more... I don't know." You trail off.

"Do you want to stop?" He asks seriously, backing away slightly.

"No!" You almost shout. "I'm just so lost."

"I guess I just feel comfortable with you. I've wanted you for so long and now that I finally have you, I just feel so different." He smiles.

"I'm all yours."

"Good," he kisses your thigh. He begins to trail up to your pulsing heat in a line of kisses. Gently he pulls the remaining fabric off of you, leaving you in just a tank top that you happily remove. His fingers graze across your clit, your nerves sending tingles through your whole body. He grabs both of your thighs, squeezing gently as he drowns his head in you. His tongue moves all around, making you see stars. He licks at your entrance, slowly sliding in a finger out of nowhere.

"More..." you beg. He slides another in, slowly pumping. Each time he slides in he curls at just the right place, almost sending you over the edge. The mixture of his tongue and fingers begins to take over you, making you grab his hair to relieve some of the pressure.

"C'mon baby finish for me." His words vibrate into you. With this your orgasm finally collapses onto him, relief suddenly flowing through you. You raise up and look into his menacing eyes. The two of you exchange deep breaths as he holds you in his arms.

"Your turn." You exhale.

"Think you can handle one more?"

"Why don't you tell me, Dr. Reid. The corner of your lip curves up. Oh sorry, I mean sir."

"Guess we won't know unless we try." He leans in to kiss you, then kissing down your neck and leaving a red spot from sucking.

"Better hope Gideon doesn't see that," you laugh.

"Yeah good luck. He would never suspect it from me."

"I didn't either," you mumble, Moving down his body you slide his sweatpants off and run your hand up his shirt, purposefully ignoring his huge erection. He takes it off, the two of you completely vulnerable to each other now.

"Think you can take it?" He laughs.

"Watch me." You sit on his waist, slowly sliding his dick in. He whimpers, the unholy sound sending shivers down your spine.

"Fuck," he says under his breath. As you gain speed his mouth falls open and he leans his head back. Moans escape his lips and you've never been more content in your life. He grabs your chin once more, placing it between his index and thumb. "You're so pretty riding me like the princess you are. I love it." You speed up at his words, desperate to make cum. "I'm so close love, keep going." Every new pet name sends you head over heels for him.

Acknowledging how close he is, you pull off and begin to suck on him. He releases almost instantly with a quiet moan. He looks down and watches as you swallow his load.

"Woah." Is all you can manage out as you both admire each other in such a state.

"Never thought this would happen." He says smiling.

"Me neither." You smile back and crawl up next to him, pulling the messy sheets over the two of you. He kisses you on the forehead and pulls you in closer. "Feel relaxed now?" You laugh.

"Oh definitely. More than ever."

"So... the lamp goes off now?" You ask excitedly.

"Yes," he sighs and reaches over to twist the knob on it. "The stupid lamp can go off."

[hanniedream]

drunken confessions with joshua hong.

warning: mentions of cheating but it doesn't actually happen, joshua is drunk.

a/n: the drunk shua brainrot is never leaving me i fear. and just so you know, whenever i post about drunk shua it's always @synthetickitsune's fault. always.

you never fought with joshua. sure you had a few minor disagreements here and there as every normal couple do, but you can't think of a time when an argument between you has gotten this big. this time feels different, joshua had to physically remove himself from the situation and told you he had to go for a walk to get some air and clear his head.

a walk shouldn't take longer than thirty minutes, maybe an hour at most. at least that's what you thought, but the doorbell rings at close to 2am instead and you jump up from the couch where you had accidentally fallen asleep on while waiting for your boyfriend to come back so you can hopefully talk to him and clear the air before you go to bed.

you open the door to see a very drunk joshua being held up limply against seungcheol's side and you quickly move aside for them to come in.

"sorry for waking you," seungcheol says as he helps joshua lie down on the same couch you'd just gotten up from. "i was going to bring him back to mine but he insisted on coming back here."

you quickly shake your head, "don't worry about it. sorry for troubling you."

seungcheol smooths down his t-shirt as he stands back up then looks at you, "i don't know what happened exactly since he wouldn't say much, but judging from the way he was drinking earlier he must be pretty upset."

at the mention of your fight from earlier, you let out a sigh then give seungcheol a reassuring smile. "i'll talk to him tomorrow morning."

he doesn't say anything and only gives you a nod then heads for the door and you see him out with a quick "thank you".

turning around after shutting the door, you see joshua flip on his side as he tugs roughly on the collar of his button down plaid shirt. he must be uncomfortable. you pick out a t-shirt he often wears to sleep from the closet then go into the bathroom to get a wet wash cloth before coming back out into the living room.

"sit up," you tell joshua as you tap him on his shoulder lightly.

no response.

you attempt to pull him up into a sitting position and after struggling for what feels like forever, you finally succeed. with one hand, you brush his hair back from his face and start cleaning him up with the other. you're about to unbutton his shirt when his hand suddenly flies up to stop you.

"what are you doing?" he slurs with his eyes still shut tight, fingers tightly wrapped around your wrist.

"what do you think? i'm cleaning you up." you try to free your hand from his grasp but even while drunk, joshua was still a lot more stronger than you.

you try to undo his buttons with your other hand and you hear him mumbling something so you lean closer to him and you finally hear what he was saying.

"i'm in a relationship."

a fit of uncontrollable laughter escapes you at the ridiculousness of the situation once you understood what he thought was happening. you continue unbuttoning his shirt and you're about to remove it when joshua's hand shoots up to hold the collars together, preventing you from taking it off him.

"i don't know who you are or what you're trying to do," he struggles to get out between hiccups. "but i'm in a very loving and happy relationship and i hope you can respect that."

he throws his head back to rest against the cushion as he begins drunkenly rambling about how much he loves his "other half", how he pictures their future together and how he would never ever do anything to jeopardize that. you would definitely find the scene before you romantic and sweet if you didn't suddenly recall that right before this was your very first serious fight, the whole reason why joshua even got this drunk in the first place and now his intoxicated self is telling you how much he loves you and wants to potentially spend the rest of his life with you.

you don't have much time to be lost in your own thoughts and feelings though because joshua is trying to tell you something and he's signalling you to come closer.

"i can hook you up with a friend of mine though," he shoots you a cheeky grin and before you can even reject his idea, he's scrambling for his phone in his back pocket. the action nearly causing him to fall off the couch.

"soonyounggggg," he calls out loudly once the call gets connected and you roll your eyes. god, he sure is obnoxious when he's drunk.

he turns the phone over to you and you burst out laughing when you see an equally, if not more, drunk soonyoung looking back at you. his face was red and he can barely keep his eyes open.

"say hi," joshua instructs softly and you give the camera a half hearted wave. "soonyoung, would you be interested in meeting this person? like for a date?"

soonyoung leans closer to the screen and squints his eyes at you then he leans back with his lips pursed as if he's seriously considering joshua's suggestion.

"why are you not asking me if i'm interested in your friend?" you interrupt before soonyoung can answer.

joshua sits up slightly to look at you, "are you interested in meeting soonyoung?"

"no, i'm not."

"why not?" he whines. "soonyoung is amazing, he's cute and funny. oh, and he's a dancer too." he wiggles his brows at you suggestively.

you shrug, "i have a boyfriend."

joshua lets out a loud gasp as if you'd just told him something scandalous then he whispers, "why were you trying to undress me then?"

"because," you take his phone from his hand to end the call with soonyoung, "my boyfriend is drunk so i'm trying to get him cleaned up so we can go to sleep."

he looks at you with furrowed brows and you can almost see the gears in his head turning then he opens his mouth, "what has that got to do with what i asked you?"

"shua," you sigh as you rest your hands on his shoulders to look him in the eyes and you can see how hard he's trying to focus. "you're my boyfriend."

his mouth forms an 'o' before he tells you, "well... y/n isn't going to like what you just said."

you figured trying to reason with a drunk man isn't going to lead anywhere so you give up and make him drink some water then tell him to get some sleep before heading back to the bedroom. you're nearly at the door when your phone vibrates in your hand and you find a text from joshua that reads: hey.., im nit surw what exavtly happrned bit appatentlt weve brokwn up ans im seeng somwone else mow

joshua wakes up the next morning confused and with a pounding in his head. he looks around to check the surroundings and flashbacks of what happened before he left the house last night comes rushing back to him. he rushes to the bedroom to check if you were there only to find the room empty and the bed was made. did you leave the house after him and spent the night somewhere else? he goes back to the couch to check his phone and sees the last text he'd sent you and panic grows in him, it reads like a break up text and he needs to explain to you that that's not what he meant. he checks his call log to see if he'd called you last night and finds that his last call was to soonyoung so he calls him to ask if he remembers what they had talked about.

"well, there was someone else there with you..." soonyoung closes his eyes as he tries to remember the details. "you said something about meeting for a date."

joshua's eyes widen. he'd brought someone else home? were you home when that happened? is that why you left?

all he can think about is how badly he'd fucked up and how he needs to fix this when he hears the sound of the front door unlocking and he quickly tells soonyoung he's ending the call.

"oh, you're awake." you glance at him briefly before kicking off your shoes.

he gives you a sheepish look then blurts out, "i didn't mean it."

you stop in your tracks then turn to him, "what?"

"what i said last night during our fight," he takes a deep breath to prepare himself for what he's about to reveal, "...and that text. i'm not breaking up with you and i'm not seeing anyone else."

the mention of the drunk text made you chuckle and joshua shoots you a confused look.

"i'm not sure what happened last night but i asked soonyoung and he said i might have brought someone home with me," he looks at the floor because he can't bear to look at your face and see how hurt by this you'd be but he hears you start laughing even louder and his head shoots up. "you don't care that i might have cheated on you?"

it's funny how hurt he sounds when he asks you this.

"shua..." you're breathless from all that laughing, "how can you cheat on me with me?"

"what do you mean?"

"that person soonyoung saw on the call was me."

you sit down next to him and proceed to explain everything that happened last night including his drunk confessions and ramblings then you both start laughing at the fact that joshua called soonyoung to set you up with him and you stop when you suddenly remember that you were still in the middle of an unresolved fight.

"but i thought we talked it out last night," he looks up at you with his big, doe eyes and he knows it works like a charm every time, "with my love confessions and all."

"you couldn't even recognise me and literally tried to set me up with soonyoung."

a pout forms on his lips, "i was drunk and also an idiot."

"yeah, you are."

"but i'm an idiot who's very, very sorry."

"you'd better be."

"i am," he says with a firm nod then he reaches for your hands and is relieved when you don't move away. "and i'm also an idiot who loves you very much."

you're silent and he squeezes your hands gently, "i'm also an idiot who's begging for your forgiveness and will die if you don't forgive me."

you pull your hands out from his to hold them instead and you let out a sigh. "i'm also an idiot that's sorry about what happened."

joshua smiles at you then leans in to kiss you softly and you feel his smile grow when you kiss him back.

"so i'm guessing you don't want to date soonyoung?"

"i'm breaking up with you."

joshua pulls you back down when you try to stand up, "so you can date soonyoung?"

you shove him away, "now you're just pushing it."

[wileys-russo]

as you would assume all alessia x reader 😭

getting into a fight with alessia, would she be stubborn or very apologetic

alessia not being able to sleep without physical touch, but you can't sleep because you're too hot

being up late studying but alessia is tired from training and just wants to cuddle up but you really can't yet

taking care of her after a rough day

you don't need to post this one, just a couple ideas :]

couldn't fit all of these into one blurb but did a lil clingy gf less moment bc we love a touch starved blondie

touch starved II a.russo

"i can clean up later baby you look shattered, please go to bed." you tucked a loose strand of blonde hair behind your girlfriends ear, no denying you were positively infatuated with the striker.

"only if you come with me." alessia demanded with a pout, balling your top in her fists and tugging your body closer, your arms wrapping around her and playing with the baby hairs on the back of her neck, the italian a good half a foot taller than you.

"i'll be in later i have to finish this paper, its due by midnight." you bit your lip guiltily, admittedly having procrastinated your uni assignment just a little too long. "are you gonna be in the living room?" the blonde asked hopefully, assuming she could then at least lay down beside you as you worked.

"office, i need the scanner and printer." you shook your head, stomach lurching with guilt as the girls face visibly dropped at the answer she had hoped against hearing. "tomorrows my rest day i'll just stay up and wait for you, watch some more of my show." alessia decided, unwrapping herself from you and heading for the lounge.

"less you've been up since like four in the morning, just go to bed." you smiled at the stubborn nature of the older girl who shook her head, curling up into a ball on the lounge and flicking on the tv.

"i can't sleep without you there." alessia frowned and your heart melted at her words. "yes you can, you manage it on away games and camps." you smiled, cupping her face and tracing the frown lines on her forehead, smoothing them out with your thumbs.

"that's different!" alessia protested, though she visibly struggled in trying to explain how.

"fine but don't fall asleep in here, you'll hurt your neck again!" you cut in to save her further struggle and warned seriously as the striker rolled her eyes. you bent down to peck her lips before padding off to your office, which was really just the third bedroom of your shared flat. alessia often needing a quiet neutral space to do her media duties you'd both deemed it a more appropriate use of the space since you already had a guest bedroom set up.

around an hour and a half later you were tracking along well, you had another two hours until your paper was due and you were already halfway done.

craving something sweet to help your motivation levels you made your way toward the kitchen, though glancing over at the lounge you sighed noting the now dead asleep mop of blonde hair still curled up in a ball.

switching routes you made a beeline for your girlfriend, squatting down beside her and gently poking at the blonde who groaned and turned around to her other side as you turned off the tv.

"babe please go to bed!" you requested while shaking her as her bright blue eyes sleepily fluttered open and she stretched, the slight wince on her face as she moved her neck not going unnoticed by you.

"told you your neck would hurt you idiot." you remanded with a shake of your head, standing and offering her a hand up, a mistake on your behalf as the girl interlocked your fingers but instead pulled you to fall on top of her, long limbs wrapping tightly around you.

"alessia!" you laughed trying to squirm out of her grip but with the taller girls build much more muscular than your own, there really wasn't a point. "don't leave me i miss you, i haven't seen you all day." she mumbled into your shoulder as you rolled your eyes playfully.

"you were only at training for a few hours, we just had dinner together and i'm right here!" you rewarded her neediness with a kiss, alessia's large hands making their way under your top and caressing your bare back. her perfectly manicured nails gently scratched against your skin and your eyes fluttered closed in relief, a sense of calm settling over you, you could happily melt into the girl and never get up again.

but unfortunately you knew this was an option not available for the taking.

"do you not love me?" you asked rhetorically, snapping the half asleep girl to attention as she scoffed. "of course i do what sort of a question is that?" she accused only hugging you tighter as she pushed her legs to slot inbetween your own, your body now well and truly trapped in her iron clad grip.

"loving partners let their girlfriends do their assignments and further their education, do you not want to be able to brag that your girlfriends a fully qualified physiotherapist?" you challenged, admittedly now becoming quite uncomfortable in her grip, it was peak summer and without the luxury of air conditioning you were beginning to get quite hot tucked in so close together.

"actually no because then everyone's going to want your hands on them. don't pretend like you haven't already promised half the girls free massages and adjustments once you graduate!" alessia quipped, though the pride and adoration in her eyes betrayed the playful sarcasm of her statement.

"yeah these magic healers will sadly no longer only belong to you!" you grinned wiggling your hands in her face as she rolled her eyes and playfully bit the tip of your index finger, you flicking at her nose in retaliation.

"but seriously i need to finish my paper and though you are the hottest girl on the planet right now you are actually the hottest girl on the planet, i'm melting!" you whined, alessia allowing you to pull her hands off and untangling her legs from yours.

"go to bed my love, i'll be there in like an hour once i finish." you assured, alessia nodding with a defeated sigh as the two of you stood, exchanging a lingering hug and a goodnight kiss before you parted ways.

alessia headed off to the bathroom to get ready for bed and you back to the office, though not before a quick detour to the kitchen for something sweet.

"if you're not beside me in an hour i'm coming to get you!" alessia yelled from the bedroom before you heard a loud squeak and a thud which would have been the blonde belly flopping onto the mattress as she did every night, normally on top of you.

smiling at her words you zoned back into your paper, eyes flicking between your computer screen and your pile of messily scribbled notes which were spread everywhere all over the desk around you.

true to her word and being unable to fully fall asleep without you beside her in bed, alessia leant against the doorway exactly an hour later, clearing her throat as you spun around in your chair to face her.

giving her a brief look of both guilt and nerves you didn't have to say much more for alessia to catch on you still weren't finished. "i'll be back again in twenty minutes, and if you're still not done then i'll be back every ten minutes after that for a kiss." the blonde pouted as you couldn't help but smile at her clingy nature, this nothing new as the harder the striker was pushed in training the more she sought out your affections when she returned home, nodding in agreement.

"i'm trying." you assured seriously and your girlfriends face softened. "i know, and i want you to get it done so we can spend the day together tomorrow stress free. i've got plans!" alessia tilted up your chin, pecking your lips as you gave her a curious look.

"plans?" "for me to know, for you to eventually find out." "that's not a terrifying thought." "are you accusing me of being a bad planner?" "well...you did forget our-" "for the one hundreth time i didn't forget our anniversary, i just simply got the dates mixed up."

"do your paper, i love you." alessia stole another kiss, running a hand fondly through your hair before padding back off to the bedroom.

what felt like only minutes later, though you knew had been much longer due to your girlfriend popping in repeatedly to steal a kiss and try to hurry you into bed with her, you bit down on your bottom lip as your eyes glanced down at the time, seeing you suddenly had only five more minutes to finish your references index.

muttering to yourself your fingers flew curiously across the keyboard, and with what was surely seconds to spare you clicked submit, exhaling deeply and leaning back in your chair, burying your face tiredly in your hands.

closing your computer you darted quickly around the flat, locking up and flicking off lights and lamps, eventually stepping into your bedroom with a small sigh of relief, checking the window was cracked open to try and diffuse the heat of the sticky summer night.

alessia sent you a toothy smile as she scrolled through her phone, eyes occasionally flicking up to stare at you as you changed into an oversized shirt, tossing your shorts and bra into a corner to be dealt with tomorrow.

"hiii." alessia grinned and opened her arms as you finally made your way toward the bed, the girl laying on top of the covers due to the heat. "hello." you smiled tiredly and collapsed into her, reaching over to flick off the bedside lamp, engulfing the room into darkness as alessia placed her phone on charge.

sincere words of endearment whispered inbetween tender kisses and soft giggles, the two of you slowly began to doze off, though no sooner had alessias body relaxed did yours tense up, the combined body heat of the two of you making your brow line bead with sweat.

checking the italian was soundly sleeping you carefully shuffled away, placing a bit of distance between the two of you as your eyes shut, finally starting to drift off.

"c'mere." alessia mumbled tiredly, reaching blindly back out for you eventually grasping at your top, pulling you back toward her.

"baby i'm sweating its so hot, can we just have a little bit of space? we can still hold hands?" you tried to bargain softly, gently removing her hands from where they clenched tightly to your top and interlinking your fingers, alessia mumbling something incoherent but not making any move to argue as you let out a quiet sigh of relief.

though it couldn't have even been a few seconds later before there was rustling beside you and alessias body flopped on top of yours, the taller blonde burying her face in your neck and grabbing your arms, tiredly wrapping them around herself as she tangled her legs with yours and muttered something you again couldn't quite understand.

sighing in defeat you slid a hand up her top and began to absentmindedly trace patterns on her back, moving your other hand to tangle in her golden locks and scratching your nails against her scalp like you knew she loved, pressing a kiss to her warm forehead and accepting you simply weren't going to sleep well tonight.

but for the seemingly touch starved blonde sleeping soundly on top of you, it would always be worth it.

[katyswrites]

you're a bandit like me

Pairing: Baron Lamram/afab!reader

Warnings: SMUT (18+), references to crime, unprotected p in v, oral sex (reader receiving), sneaky links, no use of y/n, SPOILERS for Marmalade

Wordcount: 3k

A little blurb about Baron - takes place after the end of the movie, later that night. A universe in which you're his sneaky link, and a partner-in-crime - and he needs you, now.

It starts with a knock on your door in the middle of the night. You’re in bed, flicking between channels, ultimately settling on the late-night news to hopefully help lull you to sleep. 

You’re half-conscious, the reporter’s voice a dull din in the background.

“- federal agents have given a new description of the suspect, who they say they have previously mis-identified as a female -”

You’re falling asleep in the blue glow of the television, until you hear the frantic tapping on your door. You jump, suddenly alert - you covertly grab your gun off of the nightstand - you never sleep without it nearby -, and slowly walk towards the door, consciously avoiding the squeakiest floorboards. The knocking is continuing, and part of you worries that the cops have truly, finally caught up to you. You bring your eye up to the peephole, and breathe a sigh of relief.

He’s standing there, the same as ever, if not a bit more tired-looking. And -

“You cut your hair,” you say, breathing a sigh of relief. 

Baron nods.

“Yeah, I did. Planning to use that on me?” he asks. You glance down at the gun in your hand, and laugh, putting it down.

“No - sorry, I just - can never be too careful.”

He nods, a mutual understanding shared between the two of you. You step back, not even needing him to ask to be invited in, bolting the door behind him. 

You hadn’t heard from him in weeks, but that’s typical - you only reach out when you need each other. Though, he usually at least prefaces his visits with a phone call.

“What’s going on -”

You don’t get a chance to finish, because his lips are on yours, hands holding your face to pull you close to him. You let your eyes flutter shut, kissing him back with a bit of desperation - he tastes like menthol cigarettes, and the flavor of gum he likely just chewed to try and cover it up.

Your arms wrap around his neck, pulling his body impossibly closer to yours - you’ve only managed to make it a few feet inside the doorway. It nearly kills you to pull away, just to look at him.

“Are you okay?” you ask quietly.

He nods, lips slightly swollen from yours.

“Yeah - I - it’s all good. Just had a long day.”

You raise an eyebrow.

“Long how?”

You know what Baron gets up to when you don’t see him - you and him are alike, in that way. You rarely go into the details of each other’s misdeeds - except, perhaps, the occasions when he shows up to your place with a sack full of cash, begging for you to get him a car, or a weapon, or a fake ID - whatever he needs. You’re always happy to oblige - it’s your specialty, after all. You’re even the one who taught him how to hotwire, even though he’ll never admit that. Sometimes he comes for a few days, just to lay low - you’ve done the same, just a few times. Only when he’s passing through, trying to throw someone off of his trail. But something is different this time. 

He just shakes his head.

“You’ll find out in tomorrow’s papers, I’m sure.”

You nod in understanding.

“Were you followed?”

“No - don’t think so. Pretty sure I shook them back in Alabama.”

You just bring your hand up to card it through his hair, chuckling.

“Almost didn’t recognize you,” you say.

“Do you like it?”

You can’t help but smile.

“Oh, yeah - it’s really nice. Kind of… sexy, actually.”

He smirks, his face reddening a bit.

“Well, if I had known you’d say that, I would’ve done it a long time ago.”

“Does it… is this anything to do with your long day?”

He just nods solemnly, his eyes never leaving yours.

“Okay,” you say - it’s enough information, for now. “So… I’m guessing you’re not here just to hide out, are you?”

The corner of his mouth twitches, fighting another smirk.

“No.”

Then you’re kissing him again, pulling him down by his shirt collar. He sighs against your lips, wrapping his arms around you as his tongue enters your mouth.

“Bedroom,” you murmur, bringing him with you as you step backwards down the hallway.

You stumble through the doorway together, never pulling your lips away from one another. He’s holding your face in his hands again, gently, as if he’s worried you might break. It’s a contrast from his mouth, rough and demanding against yours.

You reach for his leather jacket, helping him shoulder it off and throw it on the floor.

“Need you,” he grumbles. “I - I just -”

“It’s okay,” you say, placing a finger on his lips. 

There’s always been a mutual understanding between you two, ever since he first came to you two years ago, looking for a car and a gun. You hadn’t questioned why - in your line of “work,” you never did. But, there was something else, too - your lifestyles made it impossible to do this with anyone else. Other people were dangerous - they asked too many questions. Baron, on the other hand… you know it’s not even his real name. He doesn’t know yours, either - it’s better that way. Pseudonyms keep things easier, and make this only one, incredibly small part of your life. Sometimes, all you needed from each other was someone to touch, to hold. Still, it doesn’t change how much you miss him every time he disappears on you.

But he’s here now, and he wants you - no, needs you, in his words. 

So you start unbuttoning his shirt, kissing his neck as you do. He groans, hand coming up to cup the back of your head and pull your lips back to his.

He pushes you back gently, leading you to the bed until the backs of your knees are hitting the mattress.

You fall back a bit gracelessly, and he follows you, reaching desperately for the hem of your oversize t-shirt. You oblige, pulling it over your head to reveal your breasts to him.

“No bra?” he asks, grinning.

“I was about to go to sleep, until you -”

And he’s kissing you again, hand pressed against the small of your back. It begins to wander, calloused hands brushing against your soft skin, covering the expanse of your back until he comes around to cup your breasts. You kiss him desperately, gasping as he toys with your nipples. You bury your face in his neck, your sensitive buds hardening under his touch.

“You like that, baby?” he coos. You just moan into his skin, reaching down to fumble with his belt buckle.

It’s not long until you’ve rid each other of all your other clothes, and he’s pushed you back onto the mattress, crawling over you. 

He smiles down at you, face hovering inches from yours.

“Hi,” he whispers.

“Hey.”

“I just - thanks.”

“For what?” you ask.

“Always answering the door, picking up the phone, just - saving my ass, over and over again.”

“It’s what we do,” you say, pulling him down for another kiss. “We help each other.”

“You’re really helpin’ me right now,” he says, chuckling.

Then he’s reaching down, his fingers brushing against your cunt, and you gasp.

“Need to touch you, baby,” he murmurs, coating his fingers in your slick as he runs them along your slit. He’s kissing down your body, slowly, and you feel yourself shiver with anticipation. You sigh, letting your head fall back against the pillow.

“Spread ‘em for me - that’s it - been thinkin’ about this pussy all day -”

Your legs fall open, giving Baron’s fingers full access.

“So fuckin’ wet - just relax, baby -”

He begins circling your clit with his thumb, his other hand planted on your hip to keep you pinned against the mattress. He slips a finger inside, and you moan, involuntarily clenching around him as he adds a second one.

“You like that?” he murmurs. You just whine, bucking against his hand as he pumps his fingers into you.

“‘Course you do - I know just what you like - fuck, look at you,” he says, continuing to work you open with his fingers. 

You moan, writhing as you feel pleasure coarse through you, his fingers so much larger than your own - only for it to stop, suddenly.

He doesn’t even give you a chance to whine in protest, because his mouth is on you, tongue swirling around your clit. You cry out, back arching at the feeling of his mouth, pillow-soft and lapping at you like you’re his last meal.

“So fuckin’ sweet,” he murmurs against your cunt, licking a long line up your slit. You moan, his hands holding your hips to the bed as he eats you out. He focuses his tongue back on your clit, swirling circles around it as his hand comes back, slipping two fingers back into you with ease. 

He grins against your skin at the sound of your whines when he adds a third finger, pumping in and out of you at an unrelenting pace.

You find your own hands wandering, running your fingers through his hair and gripping, pulling him closer. You’re not used to it being so short, but it still serves its purpose all the same. He groans as you pull on the chestnut strands. 

“I’m close,” you breathe, feeling your face flush, your heart thudding in your chest. There’s pressure building in your core, ready to snap at any moment. He just hums, the vibration against your cunt pushing you even closer to the edge.

It takes one more circle of his tongue over your clit, and you’re done for - you’re bucking your hips into his face, tugging harshly on his hair as you see stars behind your eyelids. You scream as the pleasure washed over you, the orgasm intense and white-hot. He works you through your high, continuing to lap and lick at you, gradually slowing down as your whole body shakes. It’s almost too much, but you can’t even find the words to ask him to stop. By the time he removes his fingers from you, you’re a mess. You feel boneless, certain you'll sink all the way through the mattress if you aren’t careful.

Your breathing is deep and labored, not even able to form words as Baron presses soft kisses to your inner thigh. He brings himself back up over you, kissing you fiercely. You still faintly taste yourself on him, and smile into his mouth.

“You good?” he asks, smiling smugly.

You nod, still a bit breathless. “Fuck - yeah, so good.”

He kisses you again, his mouth glistening with you as you feel his hard cock press against your stomach.

“Not gonna lie - not sure if I’ll last long,” he whispers. “Just kind of wanted to make sure you felt good first, just in case -”

“It’s fine,” you assure. “Don’t worry - I’ve got you.”

You don’t worry about coming again, not really - he needs you, needs this. You never ask each other questions, but you know something must have happened that’s set him over the edge. So, you just kiss him, and hold him close as he lines up with your entrance.

He groans as he pushes into you, his cock stretching you out. You gasp, digging your fingernails into his back as he fully bottoms out, still not quite used to his size after all this time.

He wastes no time, and you don’t mind - you’re still wet and sensitive from your previous orgasm, and he begins pounding into you at a relentless pace.

You moan under him, bring your hips up to meet his thrusts. THe room is just filled with the sounds of moans and labored breaths, the slapping of skin, and the scent of sex. He’s everywhere, grunting and groaning as he thrusts.

The feeling of him is exquisite, his cock feeling like it was made for you as it drags deliciously along your walls. 

“Takin’ me so well,” he manages, voice strained. “So fuckin’ good - fuckin’ love your pussy -”

You just mewl and whine, burying your face into his neck and sucking on the skin there. It might bruise, but you don’t care - he moans at the feeling, and picks up the pace a bit. He’s already close, you can tell. Pleasure courses through your own body, pulsing through you as he fucks you.

“Oh god -” you moan, heat building in your core. “Baron, baby - fuck, right there - fuck -”

“Needed this - the whole time I was in there - I wanted to get out, just for you - had to see you again -”

You’re not sure what he’s talking about, but you let him ramble - he always gets talkative when he’s about to finish.

“Where -” he breathes, aware of how dangerously close he is to finishing inside you.

“I - ah! Fuck - tummy’s fine - or tits, or wherever -”

He’s pulling out in a flash, his hand coming up to furiously stroke his cock. He only has to jerk himself for a few seconds, then he’s shuddering, hips stilting into his hand as he cums. You feel his hot cum hit your stomach, warm and sticky on your skin. He groans as he finishes, his hot ropes pooling onto your belly and dripping down your sides a bit. He collapses next to you, breathless. 

Your heart is racing, chest heaving as you stare at the ceiling. You both lay in silence for a few moments, before he rolls out of bed and heads out the door of your bedroom. He returns a moment later, a washcloth in his hand.

“This okay? Found it in your cabinet.”

You nod, taking it from him to wipe his cum off of you. He lays back beside you, turning on his side to look at you.

“You okay?” he asks. You meet his eyes, and nod.

“Yeah - I’m fine. That was good,” you say, wiping some of his hair off of his sweaty forehead.

“Think I need to shower for the rest of this,” you sigh, tossing the soiled washcloth aside.

“God - a shower sounds amazing,” he mutters. “I haven’t - haven’t had the luxury of taking a good one in a hot minute.”

You grin, sitting up. “Well… in the interest of saving water -”

“Right behind you,” he says quickly, practically sprinting behind you as you head down the hallway towards the bathroom.

*****

You both took your time in the shower, the hot water a sweet relief for both of you. It takes longer than it should have, since he insists on making you cum on his fingers to make up for not getting you there when he fucked you. And, who were you to deny him that?

It’s only later, when you’re both clean and dried and back in your bed, that you start to actually feel tired. The clock on your bedside reads 3:42 AM. You feel yourself drifting off, Baron by your side beneath the covers.

“You staying the night?” you ask sleepily - never a guarantee with him.

“Mm,” he says. “If that’s alright.”

“Yeah - fine. You staying for a while?”

“Not sure,” he replies honestly.

Neither of you ever make promises to one another - he could disappear tomorrow, and you may not hear from him for months. But he’s here now, warm and solid beside you. You curl into his side, and you feel him relax a bit.

As you drift off, you can almost swear you hear him say I missed you.

In the morning, he’s gone. By the time sunlight is filtering through the curtains, there’s just a cold spot in the bed where he used to be.

You try to push down the disappointment - you’ve done the same to him, after all, more times than either of you can count. Still - sometimes he stays. Sometimes.

The only evidence that he had been here at all is a jar of marmalade left on your kitchen counter - homemade by his mother, according to him. And, your favorite thing to have on toast. When you pick up the jar and look at it, you can’t help but smile.

When the newspaper gets delivered to your door later that day, everything suddenly makes sense. 

It’s just a local paper, never much news of note in it. You mostly read it for the crime blotter, hoping that they don’t have too many details on the nearby stolen cars or goods, knowing if you need to move soon before you’re caught.

But, instead, crime is on the front page - one that you know all too well:

BABYDOLL BANDIT BREAKS FREE FROM PRISON, STILL AT LARGE

You laugh, reading in the article how the armed robbery suspect somehow cleverly evaded a federal task force, and how - of course - the suspect is, in fact, male, and not the woman they thought had been chasing for two years. But you knew that already - you’re perhaps the only person who had known that.

Everything about his behavior the night before suddenly makes sense - his desperation, his exhaustion - and, of course, his disappearing act this morning.

You sip your coffee as you read the paper, rolling your eyes.

He’ll be back, you know that. But for now, you just silently root for him to make it - he’s probably in a new getaway car now, on his way to hide out in a new town, if not a new state.

You take a sip of coffee, and a bite of your marmalade toast. Then, you turn on the television  - if you’re lucky, you’ll get another glance of Baron’s face on the news, until he calls you again.

author's note: Happy Valentine's Day, y'all. I have Marmalade brainrot, so I figured I'd write this little blurb while I work on other fics. Love y'all! (Dedicated to @chateaudjo and @djoworlds)

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Up All Night 1

Warnings: dark elements, noncon, age gap, narcissim, probably name calling and nasty words, other dark elements. Proceed with caution. (older!reader)

Note: I wasn't serious about this but now I were. Please let me know what you think as it helps me a lot with ideas and I love interacting with you all.

Part of The Club AU

You rub your cheek as you check the time in the corner of the screen. You should’ve been gone an hour ago, you should have your bottle of shiraz and your episode of housewives to keep you company. You don’t know why you expected that, nothing ever goes to schedule, not with your boss.

You sigh at his empty office. You haven’t seen him for two days. He has an automatic reply that he’s ‘working remotely’. You know Mr. Drysdale well enough. He doesn’t work outside the office, he barely does anything at the office.

You go back to the PDF, your red notes in the margin of the manuscript. Big meeting tomorrow. Hopefully your boss got that message. You can only imagine what would happen if a publishing house missed their introductory conference with a major writer. That could mean thousands, if not millions, in losses. Somehow, you suspect you won’t have to imagine.

You finish the chapter and press your finger to your phone. It lights up but you don’t have anything more than the several reminders you set for yourself and automated notifications from apps you never use. Drysdale…

His last name rolls from your throat without meaning too. Something about him just irks you to the bone. Maybe it’s envy, or at very least, resent. You’ve worked all these years in the publishing business to become an assistant, all while he was born into his editor’s chair.

Another bubble pops up. You’re not the social media type. You never got much into it. Your generation came a bit too early for that, but you’ve found with men like Drysdale, narcissists really, it is a great tool.

You tap the notification and it opens the story. There he is, taking a shot with a pair of statuesque twins. Not the best look for an editor, on that night, of all nights. 

You clamp your lips shut and flare your nostrils. Right. You close your laptop as you see Eugene making his sweep. Once security pops up, you know you’ve got to go. You pack up your things and say hello to the man in the blue uniform on your way out. He knows you by name too.

You shift your glasses on your nose, the little rubber pieces starting to squeeze your bridge. You come out the front of the building and make your way to the only car left in the lot. You throw your bag in the back and drop into the front seat.

No wine for you. You’ll have to stream the episode when it comes out on Prime. You set a new alarm for the morning, early enough for you to make sure Mr. Drysdale meets his obligations.

📗

As expected, you don’t have a single call from Drysdale. You’ve left several messages since your alarm blared and broke through your four hours of sleep. You see his last activity on Insta from three in the morning and you want to throttle your own phone. This isn’t good.

You have only enough time to get yourself ready. Your morning routine of a perfectly portioned breakfast and precisely brewed dark roast is nixed. You get in your car with coffee in a travel mug. You have only one thing on your mind.

As you draw up the long drive to the ultra-modern facade, the revulsion courses from your stomach into your throat. There’s something about his style that makes your eyes roll. So obnoxious and absurd. He’s exactly a caricature of a silver-spooned brat.

You park behind the beamer and take a draw from your insulated mug. Ugh, you need caffeine, you need strength and patience. You put it back in the cupholder and force yourself out of the peace of the front seat.

You stride up the white stone walkway and hit the doorbell. Once. Twice. Five times before you admit you will not receive an answer. You bring up the emergency file in your phone and key in the door code. Drysdale would shit if he knew his mother sent you it but she is a lot smarter than him. It makes you wonder how the apple rolled so far away after falling.

You let yourself in. It’s quiet but for the catch and skip of a forgotten record. You go into the front room. Open bottles of liquor forgotten on the glass table, a broken glass on the floor, and the record player crackling through the speaker.

You pull the needle off and pause to look out through the transparent wall that gives a clear view of the entire room. You know Drysdale to be shameless but really?

You put your phone away and approach the stares. The large gap between each gives a sense of vertigo to your ascent. You get to the top and head down the hall, glancing down over the entryway as you do.

You carry on and open a door; closet. The next, a bathroom, the other, a bedroom but not used. And finally, you find the door you’re looking for. On the other side, Mr. Drysdale sleeps with his ass naked in the room, upside down on the bed with his head hanging off the foot. The same woman from his Instagram are entwined with him as they sleep the right side up. Ugh, you don’t want to picture it.

You go into the en suite bathroom and take the sleek black plastic cup from beside the sink. You fill it with cold water and unhook the amber satin robe from the door as you pass. You march to the bed and dump the water onto Ransom’s head, watching it splash down his back.

He yipes and whips his head up with an unattractive snort, “what the fuck–”

“Robert Laing is due at nine. It’s ten to eight.” You drop the robe over him carelessly and spin on your heel, “let’s go., Mr. Drysdale.”

[imnotasuperhero]

Look into my eyes (search your soul)

Wanda Maximoff x Reader

Summary: Your love for Wanda could make you go the distance and more, just to see her happy. 

A/N: A day late, but in my defence I had a packed friday, lol. I woke up after a night out with the need to finish this part and post it, so here it is! BEware of any mistake since.. hehe.. I partied all night. Also, blame tumblr for any weird design on the post.

A/N 2: For now, this is planned to be four parts with the chance to growing. So it’s on you, guys. Hope you enjoy this and gets you wanting more (:

If not tomorrow, next weekend part 3 will be out.

Part I, Part II, Part III, Part IV, Part V, Part VI, Part VII, Part VIII, Part IX

Wanda stirred, waking up to an empty bed, before looking over at the sleeping babies beside her.

Her heart couldn't grow bigger at the sight in front of her. Those two little humans were finally in this crazy world, and the fears she could feel start growing at the back of her mind were doing little to help her breathe. She just wanted for you to hurry, to be by her side like you always were.

But all hopes of you being away in search of coffee dissipated when she saw her husband sleeping on the chair at the far end of the room.

'He finally dared to show up,' she sighed to herself.

What would she give for Vision to be more like you. To be present when she needed him, to show how much he cared for her.

A few months till now, she started noticing how Vision would go on longer trips, almost as if escaping their life together. And she would be lying if it didn't hurt her. Part of her still loved him. But a bigger part told her she just missed what they were.

She could only hope he would be present in their children's lives, at least. 

The tone of her phone going off signaled her of a new message and her heart jumped at the thought of you.

Seeing your name on the screen, Wanda smiled brightly as she hurried to open it.

'Good morning, Witchy. How are the twins treating you? Hopefully, they're not too much. How are you?'

'Good morning. They surely love to sleep.. still waiting for them to wake up so I can feed them. I am alright. How are you?'

After a few seconds of her message being unread, she just lowered her phone, basking in the warm feeling burning up inside her. The way you made her feel was something that -secretly- she enjoyed deeply.

Just as her phone went off again, the twins started to cry, demanding her attention. It was at that moment that Wanda made her peace with knowing her kids became before you.

Sitting up in her bed, she tried to wake up Vision. But decided she was better without his help for it was in vain.

Slowly stepping up, she maneuvered both babies in her arms as a grunt escaped her, her whole body begging her not to move. Sitting in bed, she shifted and shifted until she found a comfortable position.

Once she was settled, she placed each boy on each one of her breasts, hissing at the pain that sprouted from the latching.

Holding back her tears, she remembered the words you'd said the day before, as the first feeding happened.

“No no, let me,” You demanded as you quickly stood up from the chair, almost running the short distance to the crying twins’ crib.

Picking Billy up, you carefully placed him in Wanda’s arms. “Here you go, baby,” you spoke softly before you picked Tommy up, cooing at him as you patiently waited for Wanda to find a comfortable position.

“I know, sunshine.” You calmly spoke against the baby’s head as you rocked him softly. “Mommy needs a little more time for two beautiful babies like you need only the best. And you know the good things need time,” you smiled as you checked Wanda, busying herself with his brother before you lowered your voice to a whisper, “But don’t worry, you can always count on me to feed you the goodies.”

“I’ve heard that,” 

Looking up from the fussing baby in your arms, you found Wanda’s eyes staring warmly at you as she tried her best to stay put, waiting for her son with open arms.

Giggling at her words, you kissed Tommy’s head before placing him against his mother’s chest. “I stand by my words,” you whispered before kissing his forehead.

The pain that ran through Wanda’s chest got her in tears. Closing her eyes, she breathed deeply as she bit her lips, trying to stay still.

Looking up at the weight by her side, she couldn’t help the sob that escaped her at seeing you wrapping your arm around her shoulders.

“I know, Wands.” You kissed her head and she just let your body be the one who held her in place. “But this is part of the process, and you have to endure it for your babies,��� you coed as you caressed Billy’s head.

“It’s for my babies,” she whispered, gathering the patience it took.

But said patience was running thick as the twins started crying at the lack of breast milk, and Wanda just felt defeated. She wanted her old life back.

Trying in vain to hold her cries, Wanda settled both babies’ heads on her shoulders, rocking them the best she could to try and calm them.

“Ugh. They’re too loud.” Vision grunted as he stood up, walking towards the door leaving Wanda with rage building inside of her.

A few minutes passed by when Vision walked back in with a nurse hot on his heels.

“Good morning, Hon,” the nurse walked to the redhead with a soft smile on her lips. “What’s the problem?” She asked as she quickly checked the charts at the feet of Wanda’s bed.

"I don’t know," Wanda spoke on the verge of more tears running down. "I tried to feed them but they started crying." She looked up at the nurse with hopes she could help her calm her kids.

"I see," The nurse paused as she checked the bag connected to Wanda's hand. "Did it happen yesterday?"

"No." Wanda sighed.

"There's an easy solution for that," the nurse smiled brightly, caressing Wanda's head, and she would lie if she didn't think about her mom at that moment. She should be here with her, guiding her.

"Let me go get some formula, yes? You're not producing much to feed both of them," she explained calmly, making sure Wanda calmed down before she walked away.

She laughed sardonically when Vision started gathering his things. “Are you really leaving now?” The redhead spits out venomously as she tried to calm her crying boys.

“Work is calling, baby. I need to make money to provide for you.” Vision nodded as he picked up the call, walking away for God knows how long, this time. And that action alone was enough to make her cry alongside her babies. The excruciating pain in her chest making it harder and harder to breathe. This was just too much.

But the nurse didn’t take much and as soon as she entered the room, she hurriedly took one of the babies from Wanda and gave her one of the bottles in her hands, calmingly feeding the twin in her arms.

“Where’s the dad?” She asked confused.

Wanda didn’t dare to look up. “He had work to do,” she whispered. Her eyes never leaving Tommy, as he happily sucked from his bottle.

“Is there someone I can call? Doc will be here soon and you might be able to go home today,” the nurse smiled as she rocked softly.

“I-” Wanda paused, thinking of you. Quickly picking up her phone, she paused before dialing your number. “Could you… Could you talk to her?”

And Wanda’s secret prayers were answered when the nurse nodded softly, locking the bottle under her chin so Billy could keep feeding and hurriedly grabbed Wanda’s phone, bringing it to her ear.

“Hi, I’m Wanda’s nurse. N- no, everything is alright,” the nurse giggled something warm. “It’s just her husband had to go away and she might be able to- Oh, okay. Be safe, though.” 

“She’s on her way,” the nurse smiled as she left Wanda’s phone on the table beside her bed.

Truth to your words, you walked through the door in less than 10 minutes.

“Sorry I’m late,” you placed the small gift in your hand on the table beside Wanda’s phone before you quickly kissed her forehead.

“I’ve got him,” you smiled to the nurse as she placed Billy in your arms. “Hi, baby,” you coed as you automatically started to rock him, continuing the nurse’s ministrations on his back.

“Hi,” Wanda spoke softly and frowned when she saw you freeze at her words for a second too long.

“You’re not the only baby, from now on,” you joked.

“You are the only asshole in this room, though.” Wanda couldn’t help the smile at your giggles.

“Touché.”

“Are they strictly to bottles, now?” The worriness in your voice had Wanda concentrating really hard on making Tommy burp, avoiding looking in your way.

“No need to worry, sweety,” the nurse jotted some things down into her notepad before giving you her whole attention. “Wanda just can’t produce enough milk for both of them, so she can either complement her breastfeeding with it or just go for the formula.”

“Ohh, I see.”

Wanda could feel your eyes on her and her whole body burned with shame.

“The doc will be here in a few, though. He’ll talk you guys through it,” the nurse smiled before walking out of the room.

Once you both were alone, Wanda felt the side of the bed shift and the releaving sigh that escaped her when she felt your body against hers had her cheeks heating up.

“How are you holding up?” You asked as you caressed Tommy’s head.

“Not gonna lie. This is a rollercoaster full of downs,” Wanda allowed her body to rest against yours, seeking the comfort she needed.

“Is there anything I can-” 

“Way to go, dude.” You interrupted your previous thought as you faked disgust at the warm feeling on your shoulder. “It’s only right that you love me, but you don’t need to be so explicit about it.” You shifted the baby from one arm to the other as you took your jacket off.

Wanda couldn’t help but laugh at your words. “I told you karma was coming back,”

“Karma is a smelly bitch,” you scrunched your nose as you walked to the baby’s bag, taking some wet wipes to clean your jacket.

Seeing you so harmonically moving with her son in your arms had her heart warming up. And she made sure to thank the Universe or whichever God out there for having a friend like you in her life.

As always, likes, comments and reblogs are highly appreaciated :)

Taglist: @summergeezburr @wandabear @red1culous @inluvwithfictionalwomen @aliherreraaa @kiancorpse @whitewidowsbite @xxxtwilightaxelxxx​ (If you wanna be added, just let me know!)

[chapel-of-rizztual]

More little ghouls??? Please? 🙏🥺

cw: regressed ghouls, age regression

Cumulus watches as Mountain pushes his food around his plate with a grimace on his face. His cheeks were slightly swollen and blotchy red from just having his braces tightened earlier that day. He was clearly struggling with, clearly in pain but trying his hardest not to let it show. He wasn’t doing a very good job, Mountain wears his emotions on his face. 

Cumulus stands from the table and moves so she’s standing behind Mountain, running her fingers through his hair.  “You doing okay, darling? I can make you something a little easier to eat if you want?” 

Mountain shakes his head.  “I’m okay, I promise.” 

She wraps her arms around his shoulders, resting her head on top of his.  “Are you sure? I can make you some soup or something?” 

He smiles at her, or at least tries to smile.  “It’s okay, I can manage.” 

Cumulus knows that’s a lie, he hasn’t eaten anything off his plate in the last fifteen minutes but she isn’t going to force help into him when he clearly doesn’t want it. 

“Okay, darling.” She places a kiss to the top of his head. “You come to me if you need anything, okay?” She gives the top of his head another kiss and feels him nod underneath her. 

She excuses herself from the table and retreats for the night, ready to soak in a hot bath and start her bedtime routine so she can get an early night sleep. She was helping Aether and Phantom in the infirmary tomorrow and a full night sleep was needed. While she doesn’t help with the medial side of things, she far from qualified for that, she knew she’d be on her feet all day taking tea, medication and friendly conversation to patients all day.

She gets awoken a few hours later by something poking her shoulder. 

“Mama?” There’s a sniffle. “Mama, please.” Another poke. “Please wake up.” 

She shuffles, blinking the sleep heaviness from her eyes and flicks her bedside lamp on to find Mountain kneeling on the floor by her bed, with tears running down his still swollen and red cheeks. 

She brushes away a few of the tears that have pooled under his eyes.  “What is it, baby? What happened?” 

He pushes his face into her hand.  “Hurts, mama.” He sniffles again, more tears welling in his eyes. “Hurts so bad.” 

“Oh, my poor baby.” She coos at him, pulling the bed covers away from her and shuffled back to make room for him. “Come in, get in. We can have a cuddle.” 

Mountain scrambles up from the floor and flops himself into her bed, whining when his sore cheek touches the pillow. 

“On you back, baby. So your cheeks aren’t touching anything.” She helps him roll over into his back. “That’s it, good boy.” 

Cumulus takes the edge of her blanket and very gently dabs at his cheeks to dry away the tears. He whimpers as she does but let’s do it, looking up at her with big wet eyes. 

“There we go. That’s much better, hmm? No more tears.” She dabs the blanket under his eyes one last time, only just noticing the deep dark circles under his eyes. 

 “Have you been to sleep at all tonight?”  She looks over to the clock in her nightstand to find it’s just past 5am. 

Mountain shakes his head with a sad whine.  “Hurts too much to sleep, mama.” 

“Oh, baby.” She runs her finger through his hair and scratches at his scalp, something he normally loves. “Have you taken anything for the pain.” 

Mountain shakes his head, pulling the covers up to his chin.  “Didn’t know what.” 

She leans over him and rummages through her bedside   draw to find a packet of ibuprofen. 

“Take these, darling.” She pops two of the pull out from the packet, helping Mountain to sit up so he can swallow the pills. “It’ll help bring the swelling down and help take some of the pain away.” She grabs her water bottle and lets Mountain take two king sips from it so he can take the medication. He whines as he swallows. 

She gently helps him to lay back down, very gently rubbing his swollen cheek with her pointer finger. “Hopefully that will take enough of the pain away so you can sleep.” 

Mountain hums, pushing his face into her gentle touch. 

“Oh!” Cumulus suddenly exclaims, making Mountain jump. “There’s something else that might help.” She rummages through her bedside draw again. “It’s teething gel from when Sunny had her wisdom teeth coming in.” She pulls out a small tube. “I don’t know how well it’ll help you, but it’s worth trying if you want.” 

Mountain nods enthusiastically, he’d try anything if would give him any relief from the pain he’s feeling. 

Cumulus squirts some of the clear gel onto her finger.  “Open your mouth, baby.” Mountain drops his mouth open obediently. 

She very carefully rubs some of the gel into his gums, not wanting to cause him anymore pain. He whimpers in relief, his eyes fluttering closed  as the gel immediately cools always some of the pain in his mouth. 

“That feel good, baby? Feeling better?” Cumulus continues to rub the gel all over the rest of his gums before pull her her finger out of his mouth and wiping it on the covers. 

Mountain nods and smiles up at her, a proper smile this time.  “Tingly.” 

Cumulus laughs at him.  “Yeah? It’s tingly?”  “Yeah, feels nice.” Mountain hums.  Cumulus cuddles into him, carding her fingers through his hair once again. “Think you can try and sleep a little now?” 

Mountain yawns, rubbing at his eyes with his fist. “Yeah. So tired, mama.”  “I bet you are, darling.” 

Mountain shuffles so he’s lying with his back to her, his cheek pressed against the pillow, but the pain dull enough now that he can ignore it. Cumulus tucks herself up against his back, pressing her face into the back of his neck and running one hand along his belly. It doesn’t take long for Mountain  to fall asleep, drooling into Cumulus’ pillow as he snores quietly. 

[copperbadge]

See, here's where I sometimes shoot myself in the foot, or wish that Tumblr had threaded comments (something I'm not normally that into) -- the therapy post has like a million great responses and I appreciate them all, but now I have a bunch of Even More Invasive Questions and lots of replies to make and am realizing it's not ideal to have these conversations out in public willy-nilly.

But I did want to post and say thank you to those who responded and I may be hitting some of you back. I also had a bunch of asks and I'm going to hopefully be replying to those too eventually. Although probably none of this will be for a couple of days at least; with the AC out, sleeping is difficult, and just getting my work done is all I'm trying for right now. There's a guy from the building coming to help me unstick my bedroom window so that I can get it open at night, which will be a huge help, but not until tomorrow.

Plus I have actual therapy on Wednesday, and while I would be profoundly uncomfortable discussing the post and responses with her, at least it's something to think about going in.

[honeygrahambitch]

I do have a thing for paternal Will tonight, I know but bear with me for this one.

Will is married since before season 1, it doesn't matter who she is, she dies after the kid turns two. Somewhere around the time Will is freed from the hospital. Great, his wife dies and he is left with a child to raise on his own.

Hannibal wouldn't take this kid away from him. He just can't. He sees them together and he realizes that this is something he cannot interfere with. However what he can do to still be present in Will life is to help him raise the kid.

Will is pretty spiteful after he leaves the hospital, and very much petty especially to Hannibal. Now add the sleepless nights and constant stress and overthinking of being a single father. His brain is full time thinking about his own demons coming to surface, being a good father and doing something about Hannibal (trapping him? Tho this slowly changes).

He genuinely enjoys playing with his kid and reading him stories or walking with him in the forest and teaching him about leaves and bugs and animals and especially about fish.

However, after the first weeks of being a single parent, Will wants is to take a 3 hour nap. Nothing more. It would be a luxury considering he has to cook and he has to watch his kid constantly.

He vents about it during one of his therapy sessions. He vents about being tired and feeling incapable of being a good parent. The heavy bags under his eyes reflect his feelings.

That's when Hannibal offers to watch his kid for a few hours so he can get some sleep. Will refuses, he can't trust Hannibal with a toddler. He has no experience. He is dangerous.

Hannibal tells him that a few hours should not be a problem. And he can cook too, Will doesn't have to worry. He promises he doesn't eat children and especially something that was conceived by Will. Will is skeptical but in the end he gives in. He needs some sleep if he wants to be able to work and be a good father.

He drops his kid at Hannibal's place and goes to sleep. What he did not expect was that his 3 hour nap turned into an 8 hour nap. It's almost midnight when he drives to Baltimore. He is desperate. Hannibal doesn't even pick up his phone.

When he starts knocking at his door he is debating breaking it down whatsoever. He regrets every choice he had ever taken. When Hannibal opens the door and Will wants to start talking, Hannibal covers his mouth instantly and gestures to him to be quiet.

"He fell asleep a while ago." Hannibal whispers. "Turned my phone off so he wouldn't wake up. Didn't expect that he would want three bedtime stories. But he said you always tell him three stories. I could not disappoint."

"I don't tell him three stories" Will whispers amused, now that he knows his kid is safe.

"At least we know he got your manipulation skills, then." Hannibal replies as he walks with Will to the living room where his toddler is sleeping soundly, wrapped in a blanket.

"We had dinner. And I also cooked for you for tomorrow."

"You shouldn't have." Will says as guilt starts creeping up on him. "I abused of your free time. I couldn't wake up." He explains as they walk into the kitchen.

"Will, you needed the sleep and I can assure you, my time was not abused off. Your kid is special."

"That's what all parents want to hear." Will says and laughs. "Does the fact that a psychiatrist says that make it a bad thing?"

"Being special? No. He must take it from his father."

"Oh, please, hopefully he doesn't."

"I disagree. Don't forget it's a matter of genes and environment. And they don't look too bad."

"Yeah, his dead has serial killer tendencies and his babysitter is a serial killer who cooks people as a hobby. We nailed the environment part, Hannibal."

They both laugh.

From then on Will is more open towards letting Hannibal babysit his kid. They are almost like a little family. Not only is it convenient for Will's time management but his kid also loves spending time with Hannibal.

Will finally reaches a certain sense of stability he has long waited for.

[goodluckclove]

How Clove Gardener Writes (an Overview)

I definitely told myself when I started this blog a billion years ago, at the dawn of human civilization, that I wouldn't make any attempt to tell you how to write. You know - other than saying just do it do the thing write it close the blog open the document type type three sentences bam look you did it good job i love you now go get yourself a treat.

But I've spoken to a few writers who seem to benefit from the insight of me just explaining how I write. So I thought I'd give a little peek into my own mindset. I cannot stress enough that this is what works for me. It's a methodology that I've built up over the course of like fifteen years of trying different things, keeping what works, and throwing the rest right out the goddamned window.

If any of this seems new and appealing give it a try. If it doesn't help I'm wrong and bad as a person (no I'm kidding but seriously if it doesn't work that's fine and we're both fine). If it helps you owe me a picture of a frog drawn from memory.

Let's see how long I ramble. Follow me under the read more!

Okay, so let's get this out of the way. I've never taken a writing class. No, that's not true. I took one when I was thirteen and another one in high school and I don't remember anything either of them taught me. Oh and I took an online creative writing class in college, but I also didn't retain anything and the next year I dropped out of college. So I also don't have a degree in jack shit.

What else? I don't outline. I've written upwards of 15 novels (13-15, I honestly can't remember) and I did not outline any of them. This includes character sheets and worldbuilding lore. My first published novel Blind Trust was born from the concept of the Lover's Knot, which is just like some witchy magic lore. I thought it would be cool so I was like "who could maybe be some guys" and then I introduced some guys and then bam 180k later it was Scott and Edgar.

I do virtually no preparation to write a novel other than the vaguest premise and maybe like one cool scene. I did not have a cool scene for Blind Trust, but I do have one for Migration Patterns. What I don't have is an ending. I don't think I've ever written a novel knowing how it ends.

Literally here's what I do. This is all I do. I sit down and I write until I don't know what's going to happen next, at which point I step away and I listen to some music or I go to the museum or I take a nap until I decide how to continue. That's it.

For me it's going to the zoo every day and seeing the monkeys. And every day they're doing something different. Sometimes they're sleeping, or they're pawing at each other, or they're gathering sticks. I can call out to them and offer to show them a card trick or share my Bugles with them, and they might come up to the wall of the enclosure to see what I'm doing. Or they might not. I do not really have control of the situation, but it doesn't matter because they aren't fully aware of me.

At some point either I have to leave the zoo for some reason. Maybe I'm tired, or maybe the monkeys have been pulled in to be fed their lunch (it's bananas and peanuts). Either way I add that day's behavior to the pile and then come back tomorrow.

Once I find an ending I go back and I read through the book again and trim any fat that's in the wrong places while adding flesh to some naked bones. Then I wait a week or more (usually I can only wait a week) and go back and do it again. By that point it's ready to hopefully have someone read it, after which I make small edits and tweaks.

That's how I do it. Or at least, that's how I do it for longform prose projects that I plan to publish. I've written plenty of novels that just stayed first drafts because I didn't feel like revising them and then I moved on to the next one. I don't regret that. I don't consider it a waste of time.

I would never consider a trip to the zoo a waste of time.

Anyways, that's what works for me. I don't know if all of this will apply to other brains. I don't know if any of it will. I figure it might just be useful to get an in-depth look at what I personally vibe with.

I'm so down to talk writing at any time, by the way. I love to do it. Tell me why you aren't writing and I would be happy to listen and try to help. Or just brainstorm. Seriously, my DMs and inbox are perpetually open. Talking about writing is one of my favorite things to do.

Let's go look at some monkeys together.

[asterrrific]

•Hyunjin x female Reader

•Fluff

•warnings: little curses here and there

---------------------------------------------------------

It was already past midnight and you still couldn't sleep.

You carefully reach for your phone to check the time.

"Damn, it's that late?" you whisper to yourself.

Slowly, you turned from where you lay in bed so you can face Hyunjin who was already knocked out hours ago.

"I wish I could sleep soundly like you, bub." you whisper as you tuck a few strands of his bangs behind his ears.

He groans in his sleep so you stop. You didn't want to wake him up.

You sit and look at him a little longer, debating if you should just cuddle with him until sleep gets to you or look for something to do so you'd eventually get sleepy.

Then you remember you have an unfinished book waiting for you at the study table just at the end of your bed.

You make sure Hyunjin is asleep and tucked in your blanket before you crawled to the edge of your bed, turning on your lamp on low so you can read yourself (hopefully) to sleep.

---

It's already 2am at this point but you're still not sleepy and it's already bugging you.

You put the book down and stretch for a bit. You jump when you felt warm hands snake around your waist.

"Why are you still up?" he mumbles behind you. His face pressed on your back.

You feel him nuzzle closer to your neck.

"I can't sleep. Like, I really can't sleep." you explain. Words leaving your brain, making it hard to explain why you can't sleep. You can't find reason. It's just that you really can't sleep yet.

You feel him detach himself from you. It's dark, except for your low lit lamp, so you can't really see what he's doing behind you.

The next thing you know, he's gently moving you to the side so you're near the wall by your bed. Half asleep, and eyes squinting, he places a fluffy pillow by the wall and pats it, urging you to lean there.

You did, and as soon as you do, he gives you back your book, grabs his blanket back, and settles so your lap becomes his pillow.

"If you're gonna finish your book, please do so. But let me sleep here so I can be closer to you still. I don't like it when you're not near me." he basically whines.

You chuckle softly at his randomness as you run your hands through his hair.

"And here I thought you were gonna force me to sleep... or help me out at least."

This time, it's his turn to chuckle.

"Babe, trust me. You'll feel sleepy once you finish your book. I can see you only have a few pages left. Don't mind me here." he mutters as he shuffles and closes his eyes.

"Wow." You sigh in disbelief but you do continue reading anyway.

---------------------------------------------------------

•Hyunjin's pov•

I pretend to sleep.

I closed my eyes so she'd think I'm already knocked out again with her lap as my pillow.

I know why she couldn't sleep.

It's because of her stupid little goal to be able to finish reading at least two books this week. I don't know why she puts pressure on herself as if her life depended on reading all of her books.

But I know it's what makes her happy so I don't nag her about it.

I felt her get up the first time, and I knew then that she's feeling restless because she knows she can finish the book she's currently reading NOW so she can start on a new one tomorrow...

But instead of finishing it this afternoon, she played with her phone.

It's the guilt keeping her awake.

Sometimes, I wonder if she loves her books more than me.

So when I felt her make her first stretch after reading for a while, I got up and did what I had to do to help her get comfy.

I know that when she stretches while reading, she's preparing to finally finish the final few pages.

I've been laying on her lap for a few minutes now, and her flipping the pages suddenly stopped. I knew sleep was finally getting to her.

I looked up and sure enough, her eyes are already fluttering close. Her head swaying to the side.

I immediately get up so I could switch with her. This time, I'm the one sitting, leaning on the wall, while I gently guide her to lay on my lap.

"Mmm no, two pages left." she complains. "I wasn't sleepy, I was just resting my eyes!"

"Yeah, not shit." I joke, keeping her from getting back up and grabbing her book from from me.

"But Hyune, I could finish it now!" she whines. I don't let it get to me.

"Tell you what, bunny... you lay there, get all comfy, and I'll read the last pages to you. Sound good?" I ask her, stroking her cheeks gently.

She looks at me with grumpy, sleepy eyes, and then pouts suddenly.

"You'd do that?" she asks. Voice fading softly. Sleep is taking over her now.

"Yes, y/n. I'll tuck you in, yeah? And if you fall asleep in the middle of my story telling, I'll let you know and then we'll reread the last parts together as soon as we get up in the morning. Okay?"

"Mkae..." she mumbles. Eyes already closed. Her eyebrows knit together.

I start reading the last two pages to her. By the time I reach the last paragraph, I hear her steady breathing gradually become a soft snore.

I look down from the book and see her already curled in a way that her back is facing me.

"Finally, the bear is asleep." I joke as if she'd hear.

I place the book back on the desk and gently move her so I can lift her back to the other side of our bed. The fact that she didn't even budge or groan a bit tells me that she's already deep in sleep.

I grab her favorite sunflower cushion and let her hug it so she can sleep better. Then, I cover us both with the blanket.

"I love you, nerd." I tease as I gently pull her to me. Her back pressed to my chest. My arms around her.

I place my hands on top of hers and caress them gently and I feel her cuddle into me more. I smile as I plant a kiss on top of her head.

"Sweet bookish dreams..." I whisper.

"Mmmm... last two..." she mumbles in her sleep.

I laugh at her sleep talk, cuddling her closer to me if that's even possible.

---------------------------------------------------------

Heyyy~

This is my second time writing an au for SKZ!

Actually, I couldn't sleep either. I mean, I'm sleepy but I can't sleep because this idea just came to me and I wouldn't forgive myself if I forget about it in the morning so I forced myself to write it down now and share it with you guys.

I'm literally slipping in and out of consciousness as I typed this so forgive me if it came out a bit meh

I hope you still like it though🥹🤍

Reacts and reblogs and comments are so much appreciated! But please don't repost it to other platforms🥹

I also want to try making more, so if you have ideas or requests, please tell me and I'd try to make one for you!🫡⭐️

Lablabbbbbbb~

[rory-butnot-gilmore]

Let Your Guard Down

you watch as Joel slowly starts to open up to you and Ellie more, and you talk to Ellie about her mom. when you make it to Kansas City, things get tense and Joel tries to mend the bridge between you two.

joel x fem!reader

one, two, three

Joel finally decided to stop and set up camp so everyone could get some rest. The three of you got everything set up for a camp, and you started warming up some of the Chef Boyardee. Joel had Ellie help him get the rest of the stuff to set up camp out of the truck. She was still talking his ear off, going on about how it was her first time camping in the woods. Joel was quiet, and eventually she gave up and came to talk to you.

“Did you and my mom ever sleep outside like this?” Ellie asked as she sat down next to you, and watched you stir the food in the pot, “Also, what is that stuff?”

“Hopefully some good tasting ravioli,” You smiled at her, “And for your first question, yes we did, there was a point and time where Anna and I slept outside for about three nights in a row,”

“Really?” Ellie looked hopeful that you would keep talking about this, about her mom.

“Mhm, we were supposed to be doing something for the Fireflies, your mom had the worst sense of direction, and hated being wrong,” You looked at Ellie, “So when I would suggest we were lost, she would tell me that she was sure she knew what she was doing,”

“Did she ever?”

“Oh yeah, she did, she was so smart, sometimes just had a tendency to rush herself and everything around her,”

“Did you ever, did you ever know my dad?”

You shook your head, “No, Anna and I got separated for about a month, then when we were reunited we found out about you,”

Ellie tried her hardest to not get a wider smile on her face, “It’s so cool that you knew my mom,”

“Yeah, and I want you to know that she would think you’re awesome.” You put some of the food on a plate for her, and whistled at Joel to let him know to come eat. The three of you sat down, and started eating. Joel was trying his best to be proper about it, cutting up his food. You just used your fork to cut the raviolis in half. Ellie on the other hand, was scarfing down the ravioli as if it was going to be her last meal.

“Slow down,” Joel sighed, and Ellie glared up at him.

“This is slow,” Ellie’s mouth was full so it sounded a little muffled, “It’s so good,”

“It’s twenty-year old Chef Boyardee,” Joel continued eating, “And I actually agree on it being good,”

“So how long are we staying out there?” You asked, “I could drive tonight if you want? I just need at least a small nap,”

Joel shook his head, “I figured I would sleep tonight, and drive all day tomorrow, make it to Wyoming by the next morning,”

“Should we set up a fire? I’m freezing” Ellie asked, but both you and Joel looked at her.

“Now why am I going to say no?” Joel snapped a little, and you lightly kicked him.

“The infected will see the smoke,” Ellie looked at you both, and you shook your head.

“They aren’t that smart, I think what Joel meant to say is we have to be careful of other people,” Ellie’s face flashed with a bit of nervousness. You tried to reassure her with a smile, “So we just need to take some precautions, that’s all,”

“Oh, would they rob us?”

“They’ll have way more in mind than just that,” Joel took a bite and you glared at him again. Ellie looked a little nervous for a second before she looked at you.

“Can you tell me more about my mom?” Ellie changed the subject, and you nodded your head. Joel glanced up a little, curious to see what you were going to say.

“Oh Anna,” You smiled to yourself, “We met two days before the outbreak, and she despite everything happening around us she still found a way to have a sense of humor about things, she got me through those first days,

We traveled together, Marlene was there too, but she started with the Fireflies and Anna and I got sent out together to try and recruit more people, so we just got even closer, after the first year she was my sister even if it wasn’t by blood,”

“Whoa,” Ellie looked at the lamp, “What did she look like?”

“A lot like you actually, you two have different eye colors, but there’s no denying you’re her daughter,” This made Ellie smile even more, which made you feel a lot better. Joel had been listening to the two of you, and watching you closely the entire time. There had been so much of your life that he didn’t know either, and it made his heart ache in the same ways yours did..

After everyone laid down, Ellie asked again if anyone would be able to find you all the way out here. Joel was the one to reassure her this time, and a little bit later you heard him get up from his sleeping bag. You rolled over and saw him standing guard at the tree line. After a moment of hesitation you stood up and went over to him, gently touching his arm. He jumped a little bit, then relaxed when he saw it was just you.

“You should get some rest Joel, I’ll do the watch,” You smiled at him, “I can sleep tomorrow in the truck,”

“I can handle it, Bill had coffee stored up so I can just make some of that in the morning,” Joel looked back at Ellie, “Just want to make sure I was right, and no one does come,”

“Well, then I guess I’ll stay up and watch with you, just in case you fall asleep,” You crossed your arms and leaned up against one of the trees. Joel stared at you for a second, before he nodded. He knew that you wouldn’t just listen and go lay back down.

“So, her mom.. What happened to her?” Joel asked quietly, you tensed up a little, “If you can’t talk about it, I understand,”

“A little bit after Ellie was born, she got bit by an infected, Marlene had to shoot her,” You clenched your jaw to try and force the sounds of her cries and that gunshot that filled your head, “I kept Ellie for about a month, until we made it back to Boston, Marlene thought she’d be safer in the FEDRA school, and I couldn’t argue,”

“Why not just, keep her? Stay in Boston with her?” Joel asked, but the underlying question was really him wondering why you didn’t stay where he could’ve found you sooner.

“Marlene had me convinced that I couldn’t do it, and maybe she was right, I hated leaving Ellie there though, so I left the Fireflies and left Boston,” You looked up at the stars, “It’s my turn to ask, what happened with Tommy?”

“Well, in true Tommy fashion, when Marlene approached him and told him that he could help change the world, he bought into it,” Joel shook his head, “Last I heard he quit the Fireflies, and is somewhere out West by himself, so I figured if we find him, we find the Fireflies,”

“Wyoming right? That’s the goal?”

“Yeah, between the two of us I have a feeling we will find him, then he can get us to where the kid needs to be,”

“And if we can’t find him?”

“We will, I’m persistent,”

“Oh really?” You didn’t mean to sound so offended, but you couldn’t lie that you were. If he was so persistent, why did he give up on you? Joel looked at you for a second, before he shook his head.

“That’s different,”

“Yeah, no, I bet it is huh? After all you can’t replace your brother, so why give up on him? But you did find Tess, so I guess that made it easier huh?” The silence was heavy between the two of you. All of the pain and anger you felt slipping through the cracks. You had tried to replace him too, you tried to give up, but you couldn’t. No matter how hard you tried you couldn’t let go.

“Y/n, you have to understand that I thought you were dead, there was no word from you, no signs of you being alive,” Joel was trying to keep his temper under control, even after you threw Tess back in his face, “I had no reason to even think that you survived,”

“Yeah, I didn’t either Joel, zero reason actually, but I didn’t give up because I loved you, and dammit I still do,” Joel’s eyes widened a little, “I know it’s not fair, I know you’re mourning Tess, but you could’ve at least acted like you were a little relieved I wasn’t dead,”

“Y/n,”

“Or maybe a little more explanation on what happened to Sarah? She was the closest thing I had ever had to a child Joel, for almost ten years of my life she was the center of everything for me too,” The tears were starting to sit in the corners of your eyes but you didn’t care, “She called me that first night, she was so damn scared, and I couldn’t do a fucking thing to help, so I promised myself that when I found her, when I found you, I would never let go again,”

“She wasn’t your kid Y/n, she was mine, and maybe if you would’ve never went on that damn trip in the first place, we wouldn’t be in the spot we are now.” Joel said it so fast, and the words sat heavy between you both. Your eyes widened a little as the idea settled in your head, Joel gave up on you because he blamed you. He blamed you for Sarah’s death.

Except that wasn’t what he wanted you to think, he didn’t even think it himself. Joel just didn’t know how to say he had to give up, because it was just either to believe you were dead. So that he would never have to see the look in your eyes when you found out that Sarah was dead. That she was dead and it was all his fault. He knew how much you loved her, and how much Sarah loved you. Joel had been scared of finding you, because he was scared that once you knew he had failed, you would never see him the same again.

You walked away before he could say anything else, and opted for sleeping in the truck. You couldn’t fall asleep though, and you couldn’t cry. Neither one would happen, so you just sat and stared out of the window. The pain in your heart felt even heavier than you could bear, but Ellie was out there. Anna’s Ellie was out there, so you couldn’t let it sit for too long. You could still help her, you could still make sure that she would be okay. After whatever tests the Fireflies had in store, you would take Ellie somewhere with you. You would never let her go again.

The sun started to come up, and you could hear Joel getting stuff out of the back of the truck for coffee. You only moved from your spot in the front seat to the backseat. After Ellie was awake, and everything was packed up again, she went to get in the back but was surprised to find you there instead. You told her to just take the front seat, and told her you wanted to get some more sleep. Joel was tense when he got into the truck, and couldn’t bring himself to even look at you. The feeling was mutual though, so you just closed your eyes and laid in the back. You listened to Ellie ask him questions, about Tommy mostly.

“If you don’t think there’s hope for the world, why bother going on?”

“You haven’t seen the world so you wouldn’t know,” Joel paused, “You keep going for family,”

“I’m not family,”

“No, you’re cargo, plus I made a promise to Tess, and she was like family,”

Then she asked the same thing you did last night, “What if you don’t find him?”

“I will.”

“How do you know?”

Joel hesitated for a second, he took a deep breath, “I’m persistent.”

Finally you fell asleep, and you didn’t wake up until the next city. Joel was looking at the blocked road, and Ellie looked back at you. You asked her what was happening and she shrugged her shoulders, she had been asleep too. Joel got back in and explained the plan was to find another way around. So you started to help Ellie with the map, trying to find a way out of the city. You were taking side streets, when you first spotted the QZ. It was abandoned, and empty. Then the man stumbled out onto the street. Joel told you both to buckle up, and Ellie was confused why he wasn’t going to stop and help him, but you told her to just listen to Joel.

It happened so fast you didn’t really understand what had happened at first. Something smacked into the windshield, and then Joel lost control of the truck. It started to spin out, and crashed through a building. Then the bullets started, as you were trying to get out of the backseat, one almost hit you in the arm. Joel pulled you out the rest of the way, and looked you over.

“You okay?!” He yelled, his hands shaking slightly, you nodded, your body hurt but it wasn’t too bad, “Ellie you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah I think so,” Joel looked around the room before he pointed out a hole.

“Do you think both of you could climb through there?” Joel asked, you looked at it, and you thought it might be a tight squeeze for you but it was possible, “When I say go, you two start for that hole and don’t come out until I say so,”

“No, Ellie, you go, I am staying and helping you,” You glared at Joel, “I’m better with a gun than I was twenty years ago Miller, accept the help and shut up,”

Joel wanted to argue with you except there was no time, so instead he focused in on Ellie, “They’re not going to hit you, you go through there and you stay until one of us says it’s clear to come out,”

Ellie couldn’t focus on him, there was too much happening around her for that to happen.

“Hey! Look at me,” Joel got her attention, “They’re not going to hit you, you stay down, you stay low, you stay quiet.”

“Go Ellie, it’ll be okay.” You reassured her too.

Once she was safe behind the wall, you and Joel started to fireback at the other guys. Joel hit one of them first, and once the other was closer you got him. You thought the coast was clear, and it got quiet for a second. Your ears were ringing from the sounds of the gunshots, but all you could think about was making sure that Ellie was still okay.

The door behind you busted open, and a third guy came through it. Joel was trying to get his gun to reload, but was able to smack the guys gun so he couldn’t shoot either of you. You tried to grab his gun from him, but he ended up shoving you backwards. Your head smacked against the counter that was behind you, and you slumped down into it seeing stars. The back of your neck started to feel warm, and you were trying to focus in on what was going on. The guy was on top of Joel now, and from the looks of it about to kill him. Ellie slowly started to come into view, and she had a gun. Where had she gotten a gun? You wanted to yell at her to get back behind the wall, but you couldn’t talk or even move. Then she shot him, and you couldn’t hold on any longer. Your vision went out, and you went unconscious.

When you started to come back to it, Joel was slamming himself into a door. Then he picked you up bridal style, muttering something about you still being too light. He got you inside and set you down, then had Ellie help him blockade the door. Ellie kneeled down and looked at you, she came more into focus as she tried to talk to you. Joel kneeled down too, his hands gently leaning your head forward. You hissed a little from the pain as he did.

“I’m sorry,” He whispered, trying to move you gently, “Can you hear me?”

You nodded, and touched the back of your head. Your hair felt sticky, and when you pulled your hand away you could see blood on it. You grimaced a little, and tried to shake it off. Ellie looked at you nervously, but you started to push yourself up. Joel was quick to help you, and he looked at Ellie.

“I’m okay, I’m good, I have my pack and I grabbed Y/n’s off the ground after I..” Ellie trailed off, she looked back at you, “You’re okay right?”

“I’ll be fine,” You tried to smile, “We need to move, get out of here before more show up.”

Joel carried your backpack for you, and the two of you snuck out the back. A couple of trucks went by, and you could hear them yelling about someone named Bryan. The three of you ran across into another building, and made your way into another hiding spot. You slouched against the wall, your breathing a little uneven. Your head felt like it was going to explode at any second with how much it was still throbbing. Ellie looked at you nervously, and Joel had you turn around so he could get a better look. He moved your hair gently again, his fingers gently brushing through it.

“It won’t need stitches, but you did cut it open,” Joel sighed, “You feel okay?”

“Yeah, yeah I know where we are at, and I remember what happened so I’m good, probably just a concussion,” You sighed, Joel went to peek out of the newspaper covered windows. You all could hear trucks rumbling through the streets now.

“Are we safe in here?” Ellie looked at Joel, and he nodded.

“Looks like they’re checking out apartment buildings first, then they’ll probably start looking into these,” Joel sighed, and moved away from the window. Ellie looked out of it, pointing out a really tall building.

“Yeah I saw, as soon as we don’t hear trucks, we move,” Joel looked at you, “Fast as we can,”

They both sat down, Ellie on the floor next to you. She pulled her knees up to her chest, and looked at Joel, “Are you okay?”

“I’m all right,” He hesitated before he looked at her again, “Are you.. All right?”

Ellie just nodded, and you looked at Joel. He gave you a look that said he would explain later. You leaned your head back against the wall, and closed your eyes for a second. Joel started to talk again though, so you opened them back up.

“Thing is, I didn’t hear that guy coming, you shouldn’t have had to..” Joel sounded like he was trying to be comforting, but he didn’t know how to actually do it, “You shouldn’t have had to, you know,”

“Well you’re glad I did, right?” Ellie looked up at him, “I mean he was going to kill you, and probably Y/n,”

“You’re just a kid,” Joel’s voice was softer when he looked at her, “You shouldn’t know what it means to, it’s not like you killed him, but I know what it’s like the first time that you in hurt someone like that.. If you uh, w- I’m not good at this,”

“Yeah you really aren’t,” You and Ellie said it in unison.

“I mean, it was my fault, you shouldn’t have had to.” Joel looked at the two of you again, but you were looking at Ellie, “And I’m sorry,”

The tears started for Ellie, and she tried her best to hide them. Both you and Joel watched her. You knew if you tried to comfort her, she would just reject it. She was a lot like Anna on that front, she didn’t want to seem weak. Especially now, when from the sounds of it, she had to do something to save both you and Joel. You looked up at Joel, who was still just watching Ellie try not to fall apart in front of you both.

“It wasn’t my first time,” She said it so quiet, you almost didn’t hear it. Joel pulled the gun out, and moved towards Ellie.

“Show me your grip, finger off the trigger,” Ellie held the gun, he scoffed a little bit, “Now, who taught you that?”

“FEDRA school,”

“Figures,” You watched Joel show Ellie how to properly hold the gun. Once she had a good grip on it, he grabbed it and shook it to show her that it wasn’t going anywhere. Ellie finally giggled again, and you were smiling at them both. He reloaded the gun for her, and handed it back to her. She went to put it in her pocket, but both you and Joel stopped her.

“Put it in your pack,” You laughed, and held a hand out to Joel to help you up. He shook his head at Ellie, and helped you up off the ground.

“You’ll shoot your damn ass off,” Joel started to un-board the door, he sighed a little and looked at both of you again, “We’ll get through this,”

“We will.” You smiled, and Ellie agreed.

The three of you made it to the building, and both you and Joel groaned at the sight of all the stairs. You all started to make your way up, and you made it to the thirty-third floor. Joel slid down against the wall, and you were knelt over breathing a little heavy. Ellie looked at you both, before she held a hand out for Joel.

“Get up you lazy ass,” Ellie laughed, and helped him up. Joel glanced up at her.

“Lazy ass” He muttered, “I’m fifty-six you little shit, Y/n’s not too far behind,”

“Hey fucker, six years is significantly far behind in my book, I haven’t even hit fifty yet still got a couple months,” You laughed, trying to catch your breath. Ellie smiled at you, and you both followed after Joel.

After you finally found what you believed to be a safe room, you and Ellie started setting up some pillows to make into makeshift beds. Joel started spreading glass around, and you and Ellie looked at one another confused.

“Joel?” Ellie asked, but Joel didn’t hear her the first time so she said his name a little louder.

“What?” He looked back at you both sitting on the cushions.

“What are you doing?”

“Do you guys want someone to sneak up on us while we’re sleeping?”

“Ohh, I get it, crunch crunch crunch,” Ellie nodded, before she flopped back on her pillows. You smiled and laid down too, it was a pretty good plan, “You sure you gonna hear it?”

“Yeah that’s the whole point,” Joel walked over to his, and Ellie just accepted it and said goodnight, “Yeah, good night,”

After a few minutes of silence, Ellie finally started to talk again, “Can I ask you guys a serious question, I meant to when we were camping the other night but Y/n made me go to bed,”

“What is it?” You looked at her, and Joel turned back.

“Why did the scarecrow receive an award?” Ellie was trying her hardest to sound serious, but the smile on her face was starting to give her away.

“Because he was outstanding in his field,” Joel answered it in such a serious tone, both you and Ellie started to laugh.

“You fucker! Did you read this?” Ellie smiled at him, but he shook his head, “Okay, hold on, here’s my actual question did you guys know that diarrhea is hereditary?”

“What?” You and Joel said it in unison.

“Yeah, it runs in your jeans..” Both of you stared at her, and she finally snickered. Then all three of you were laughing together, Joel tried his hardest to hide it.

“That is so goddamn stupid,” Joel said between laughs.

“You laughed, motherfucker,” Ellie accused and he shook his head, you were still laughing.

“I didn’t laugh,” Joel said, while still laughing, “Jesus I’m losin’ it,”

“Oh you’re losing it big time,” You laughed, and he looked back towards you. His smile looked the same as it did twenty years ago. All three of you laughed for a little bit, until Ellie finally fell asleep.

Neither you or Joel could fall asleep though, not when there was too much to say. He looked over at you, and nodded towards the other side of the room. You nodded yes, and got up to follow him quietly over there. Joel leaned against the wall, his arms crossed. Your mind flashed back to the first time you two had got into an actual fight. Even if it ended with you making up in the end..

1997

Joel got out of the truck, and slammed the door behind him. You groaned to yourself, still a little drunk. Joel walked over and opened your door for you. The sun was starting to make its way up, and you couldn’t remember if Sarah was at her sleepover or not. Joel helped you out of the truck, and inside the house. Once you were both inside, he let go of you and walked away from you. Part of you wanted to follow him, but he had never been this mad at you before.

“Joel?” You followed him into the kitchen, your voice smaller than you had ever heard it before. You felt like a little kid again, just waiting for the punishment.

“You want some breakfast? Since it’s five in the morning?” Yeah he was angry.

“I’m sorry, I lost track of time, and my phone wasn’t working,” You were standing next to the table, watching him get into the fridge. He wouldn’t even look at you, “If I would’ve known Tommy was there sooner, I would’ve had him call you sooner..”

“You were supposed to be at the bar, so how exactly did you end up at a house party?” Joel scoffed, “Also what happened to, ‘I’ll either call you or a cab at 12?’”

“Well, the girls wanted to go with some of the guys they met that night, and I felt bad ditching them,” You whispered, “I didn’t realize it was going to be a house party, or that those things were going to happen,”

Joel slammed the fridge and you flinched back, “I get that you’re young or whatever, but going to some sketchy ass house is seriously stupid and naive Y/n,”

“Oh, so that’s the card you’re going to pull, that I’m young?” You hated the way he was talking to you, “Jesus Christ Joel, you’re only six years older than me, stop acting like you have a decade over me,”

“No but clearly we can see where maturity levels are in this relationship,”

“Oh forgive me, I didn’t realize that acting like a normal person in their twenties means I’m immature?” Your voice was now getting louder, “I understand that you didn’t get to do it, you had Sarah, but I told you I wanted to call you sooner but my cellphone wouldn’t fucking work!”

“You know what? You’re right, you wanna be a normal person in their twenties? You go right ahead, go fucking crazy, but you won’t be doing it near me or Sarah!” Your eyes widened a little, and you nodded slowly. Joel’s face was red, a clear sign that he was pissed. You turned on your heels and went upstairs to start throwing the clothes you had left here into a bag. Joel was sitting on the couch when you came back down with your bag over your shoulder, “What are you doing?”

“From the very beginning I have done nothing but tell you that I love being here for you, that I love being here for Sarah, I love getting to do these things because the bars, parties, all of that shit doesn’t even matter to me,” You were crying now but you didn’t care enough to hide it; “I have one bad night, where things don’t go the way I planned, where I end up uncomfortable and scared because I don’t know where I’m at, and you threaten me with that shit?”

“I wanted to call you sooner, but I couldn’t find a way to, I wanted to come home sooner but my friends made me feel bad that I hadn’t been out with them in awhile,” You grabbed your keys off the hook, “Then by the time we’re at the house I realize how drunk I am, start asking everyone for a phone to call you until finally I come across your brother and he calls you for me, I didn’t realize we were an hour away, by the time I found Tommy I started crying because I was so relieved,”

“Y/n,”

“I’m not finished,” You cut him off, “So yes you are rightfully pissed, I shouldn’t have stayed at the bar later, I should have called you sooner and none of this would have happened, I will give you that, but don’t act like I am some out of control twenty-six year old who is a danger to your fucking daughter,”

“Just put your keys up, we can talk about this after you sleep,” Joel stood up, but you stepped away from him and shook your head, “You can’t fucking drive right now, don’t be stu- no I don’t mean stupid Y/n,”

You laughed and walked out of the front door, slamming it behind you. You got in your car and started sobbing finally. You weren’t worried about driving yourself now, everything that just happened was enough to clear your mind up entirely. There was a brief hesitation, hoping that maybe Joel was going to come outside and stop you. He didn’t though, so you took that as your sign and started driving back to your apartment. Luckily it was only a ten minute drive. You got inside and let yourself crumble as soon as you were laying on the couch.

You didn’t know how long you had been asleep, but you woke up to the sound of someone in your kitchen. You laid on the couch a little longer, trying to convince yourself it was just a dream. You could see your kitchen from where you were laying though, and you could see Joel in there at the stove. You tried to decide whether you should go talk to him, or avoiding this for now.. Avoiding was the option, and you went to your bathroom to take a shower. You locked the bathroom door behind you though, even though you had a feeling he wouldn’t try to follow you right now.

After a good shower, you got dressed in a pair of pajamas pants and one of Joel’s shirts. You came back out of the bathroom, and he was leaning against the counter in the kitchen, his arms crossed. You looked at him, the tears threatening to spill over again. Joel shook his head, and uncrossed his arms to pull you into a tight hug. He held you as tight as he could, as if you were going to float away from him. Joel kissed the top of your head a couple times, and apologized at least fifty times.

2023

Joel’s arms being crossed the way they were, reminded you of when he apologized to you. When he told you that he would never think of you as a bad influence for Sarah, that he just said those things out of fear and a little anger. You wanted to be hopeful, that maybe another apology was coming, but you also were starting to wonder if there was any part of the Joel you once knew left.

“Sarah, she.. I..” Joel looked down at his feet, you could’ve swore his eyes flickered to Ellie for a second, “You were her mom, you were a damn good one too, so I shouldn’t have said what I did earlier Y/n,”

You were a little shocked by his apology, you didn’t know what to say. Instead, you started to cry again. You hated breaking down in front of him, but instead of pushing you away.. Joel pulled you into a hug, his arms tight against you. You pushed your forehead against his chest, trying to muffle the sounds of your cries so Ellie wouldn’t wake up. Joel held on tight to you, and he rubbed your back slightly. You held on tight to his shirt, afraid that he was going to slip away again.

Joel didn’t cry, he couldn’t let himself cry over it. Yet in that moment, he felt relieved that someone shared his grief. The same amount of grief for that beautiful little girl who was his daughter. For the first time in twenties years since it had happened, Joel didn’t feel as alone in dealing with the loss of Sarah. He finally realized that he had been grieving you too, but he didn’t need to do that anymore. You were here now, you were there and you were alive..

“Move your mats closer to me?” Joel whispered, you were shocked but also relieved, he was finally letting his guard down with you again. You nodded your head, and the two of you walked back over to your spots. You moved the cushions you were using closer to his, on the other side so he could still face you.

The two of you fell asleep that night, not holding each other, but just looking at one another..

@daddysfavoritesexkitten @stupidthoughtsinwriting @superblyspeedydragon @beeblisss @kate654 @oddityhag @frogjumps-world @iheartdilfs01 @sirtommyholland

[baddoggylore]

Glitchy red x dead reader [Just a Glitch]

No one’s pov..

When you first played that Pokémon game you met a sentient Glitch in the code who was annoyed with you. But you didn’t care you played everyday and talked too him everyday and tried to be his friend but never could work but you kept trying and you hanged out with him everyday…

One day Glitchy Red noticed you not playing the game…he waited for you. Waited. Waited…but nothing for months.., he gets fed up with it and he broke the code and was able to break free- But he sees no one in the room…but he noticed something and it was your phone.. he glitched and got in it checking everything till he comes across someone’s text…

“Hey i know Your gone but…I

Miss you…, I would watch you for hours play on that Gameboy and you wouldn’t be sad…you kept talking too someone…I didn’t know who…I miss you friend…last thing I can do is take the Gameboy and put it in your casket before your buried tomorrow, Whoever reads this tho…, Make sure you know who they once were..”

“There dead…..?” Glitchy says and stares at your phone “…..was I….? Or were I?…..that bad too them…” he said and was just angry for many many years…you only wanted too be his friend you weren’t tormenting him but how did you die? Natural? Murdered? Su- he stops and puts the phone down and looks around the room…YOUR room.. something stuck out it was your Book, he picked it up and read it but something caught his eye..

“I met someone from my Gameboy, he told me his name and I was curious about him..tried too chat with him while playing the game…he hates it I know it but there’s something about him.

I can’t get him off my mind, I wanna know him more I wanna talk too him more..

I’ll keep trying until I see him smile at least then try too befriend this Character who is sentient.”

“Weeks past and I’m getting more sicker..the doctors won’t help they can’t…I was promised I could be helped but they can’t help me…what can I do? I’m hopeless…but that’s not gonna stop me till I at least get a smile from Glitchy red!”

“It didn’t work….he hates me.., I don’t think I can continue my body is hurting…maybe if I sleep it off I’ll feel better? Hopefully, I hope one day I can help Glitchy red..he deserves better then be stuck in some code…,”

…Blank page on the next part…

Glitchy red feels tears stream down his face…why is he crying?, was it because you were sick you tried to make him a glitch be friends with you.., he closed the journal and looked at his Gameboy… “….I really am a Glitch” he says as his voice glitched. Well sounded like an old Gameboy, if he could he would reverse the world too save you or too at least befriend you earlier if he could…but he still doesn’t understand… why him? Why did you care so much about him that you would do anything for him., if he wasn’t so stubborn he could’ve brought you into the game and made you stay and live…but that would also be hell wouldn’t it?…

You. You watched him read threw your phone. Your journal. You were Dead but a ghost…

Did you finally make him your friend?