#I AM EATING ALL THE BURRITOS WHILE I’M HERE

[ickaimp]

One of my favourite random factoids about Tucson is that the city was one of the first UNESCO Heritage sites for Gastronomy.

Yes, the food here really is that good. 😂

No, but seriously, agriculture here dates back over 4,000 years, the longest in the US, and some of those plants are still cooked and eaten here today.

And the food is really good.

[greatooglymooglyyy]

Bone Tired- Matt Sturniolo

a/n: since i did chris, might as well do matt. i think i like writing these. send me requests if you want and let me know what you think? also there is a bonnet mention cus y'know... i'm mixed. idk

contains: fluff, cussing, light kissing, alludes to sex but nothing on page, established relationship, 800+ words

I groan as I wake up from the feeling of suddenly being way too cold. I glance over to my left, where, of course, Matt has rolled the entire damn duvet around himself like a burrito. I sigh and check my phone for the time. 8:34am. Might as well get up, I guess. I sit up, getting ready to slide out of bed, when I feel something tug me backwards. Matt pulls me into his side and back under the covers before curling around me.

“Where are you going?” He asks, voice still thick with sleep and his eyes barely cracked.

“Ohhhhh, so you wake up when I'm getting out of bed but not when I'm over here freezing to death for half the night?” I joke, snuggling my head into the crook of his neck.

“That’s on you; it’s eat or get eaten in this blanket game.” He says back, a hint of a smile in his voice.

“I really do have to get up soon. I have plans this morning.”

“Do they involve leaving this bed?”

“Bro-”

He makes the wrong answer buzzing sound and I fight back my laugh.

“Matty.”

“Better. Still no.”

I’m silent for a few seconds before I play my favorite card. I face him, weaving my fingers through his hair, and whisper softly, “Baby.” And I watch him melt, like he does every single time. "I don't like pet names,” my ass.

“When’re you coming back?” He asks, leaning in close and dropping kisses down the side of my jaw.

“Tonight.”

He sighs and untangles his body from mine. “I feel like I never see you in the daylight anymore.” He says as he slips out of bed and stretches.

“I know. I know. It's busy season at work, and they are killing me.” I say, following him out of bed into the bathroom. He turns the shower on while I start to brush my teeth. When I’m finished, I look into the mirror and meet his eyes, finding him leaning on the wall and watching me.

“You know you can quit, right?" He says, for maybe the 100th time this month. I roll my eyes and turn to him, preparing to give him my whole independent woman spiel. But as soon as I open my mouth, he cuts me off.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. You’re Hercules. Shut up. The water is hot. Come on."

I laugh and lift my arms, letting him peel my shirt off for me then follow him into the shower.

***********

I turn my car off with a sigh and lay my head against the steering wheel, trying to convince myself to get out of the car. After 15 hours straight of dealing with the most annoying customers the world could hand me, walking seems like a big ask from me right now. I tap my hand against the steering wheel, wondering how much my back would suffer if I just slept here tonight.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

I look out my window to see Matt looking in equal parts annoyed and concerned. I unlock my door, and he swings it open, leaning his head in.

“Are you insane? Chris said he heard you pull up 20 minutes ago. Why are you just sitting in a car at night in Los Angeles? Do I look like fucking Batman to you? If you go missing, all I can do for you is cry.” He rants, reaching around me to undo my seatbelt.

“Sorry.” I say, my words almost slurring from how tired I am.

He pauses, probably expecting way more attitude from me. “Alright. Come on. Let’s get you in bed."

He pulls me out of the car and picks me up like I'm a small child. I lay my head on his shoulder and close my eyes, appreciating how lucky I got with him. When we’re back in his room, he puts me down on the bed, goes to my drawer to find my favorite big t-shirt, and hands it to me.

“You got this part, or you want the full toddler experience?” He jokes, already heading off to the bathroom.

"You've never had any problem undressing me before.” I shoot back as I finish slipping it on and crawling under the covers. He laughs and comes back with my bonnet, makeup remover, and moisturizer in tow.

I look up at him with what has to be the goofiest smile on my face, and he scrunches his face up at me as he begins taking my makeup off.

“What?” He says, his tongue slightly out as he focuses on getting off my mascara.

“You love me.” I whisper, half to myself.

I feel him pause his movement for a second as my statement rattles him, but he quickly recovers. He continues as if he didn’t hear me, but I catch the slightest smile on his face before I can’t keep my eyes open anymore.

“Very evident, kid.”

[frownyalfred]

*busts down your doors* HEY! Long ask for ya

okay so I was rereading your fic where EMS showed up because Dick couldn’t flip on the trampoline (rip) and it got me thinking about routine trauma.

So here’s the thing: I am not EMS. I know three people who are EMS, but my extent of EMS experience comes from one (1) ride along and lurking on EMS subreddits. Those guys are a hoot. Great memes. Anyways.

A comment stuck out to me: “You haven’t truly lived the job until you’re eating a gas station burrito next to a dead body”. I’ve seen a bunch like that. Nonchalance and dark humor because well, that’s their job. Gore is the norm. Sure, depending on the area, your usual calls might just be lift assists, but other areas are neck deep in gang violence and violent crime.

A pretty common post on that subreddit is also, sadly, “I just got a call that’s never bothered me before but all of a sudden I’m broken” or “I’ve never had a problem running this type of call before but all of a sudden it just hit me.” Delayed trauma is a bitch. Someone pointed out that if a civilian saw a fatal car accident with multiple corpses, they’d be in therapy and given support and it’d be a huge deal. With EMS, they’re just expected to deal with it. (EMS mental health is getting better- there are helplines and resources and first responder focused therapies- but it’s still a developing field)

ANYWAYS, now that I’ve given you a crash course on the EMS mental health crisis (someone should really write a feature on EMS in Gotham those fuckers would be crazy and I love them already), my point is, how would this apply to the bats? Seeing bodies is treated as very much the norm to them, but do you think it ever just… catches up? The impact of seeing corpses day after day? Do you think they have to fake being fine and tough during those times because well, “everybody else in the family is fine with it, I’m not going to be a liability/burden/weak/etc”

Do you think Bruce, the goddamn batman, who shouldn’t be ruffled by anything, ever just feels something crack inside when he looks at a little boy who could have grown up healthy and strong like his Jason, had (Bruce) someone been there for him? and then he can’t work cases with kids for a week?

This is such an excellent ask, thank you so much for gracing my inbox with it!

It's a very good question. I'm also on a lot of those subreddits (needed to do some research for that fic) and the discussion in those forums and on TikTok is like you described, a kind of practiced desensitization to all gore and suffering in order to survive in their job.

What I've seen from those discussions (and my EMT friend) is an almost sub-conscious trend where they allow themselves the "thing" that breaks them, and they push a lot of that trauma and emotion onto that thing. Like an EMT saying they don't do kids, or they don't do gunshots to the eye, etc. And they'll sob like a baby on those calls, while remaining stone-faced and level-headed through the triple homicide.

I'm just theorizing here, but I imagine the Batfamily uses similar coping skills -- pushing all that trauma and suffering into a box which cracks only under limited, defined circumstances. And they break or snap only under those conditions, because, subconsciously, they allowed themselves to.

So yes, Bruce might be 99% fine with most of the bodies he sees, but there might be a little boy who has a detail (like Jason's dark hair) that just slams into him out of nowhere.

PTSD and trauma literally change the structure of the brain. Individuals react differently to trauma after that, but there does appear to be a "desensitizing" effect with repeated trauma, as the body tries to compensate.

I agree that the Gotham EMTs must be some crazy motherfuckers. They probably deal with 6x the normal shit EMTs deal with in other cities. They probably take on a lot more trauma and burn out quicker than other EMTs, too.

Anyone else have thoughts on this? I admit I don't cover PTSD explicitly in a lot of my fics.

[in1-nutshell]

Human Buddy gets a mild illness and Spinister takes care of them

SFW, platonic, Human reader

MTMTE

Buddy didn’t bring their coat on an outing on some foreign planet. To be fair, they didn’t expect it to be cold. Misfire said it wasn’t going to be cold.

Well… there was mistake one.

Thinking that Cybertronian cold and human cold were the same thing. And taking that response from Misfire.

“You sure it’s not going to be cold?”--Buddy

“I’m sure Buddy! Just a light breeze at most!”—Misfire

So now they are heading to Spinister’s makeshift medbay. Buddy yelled out that they are coming in, so he won’t shoot. They didn’t want to be burnt while not being able to smell anything.

“Spinister I’m coming into the medbay! I am now actively walking into the medbay! I have one foot inside the medbay!”—Buddy

 Spinister acknowledges Buddy with his back turned to them. He only looks at them when he hears them sneeze. His fingers are itching for the gun but realizes that it was Buddy.

Brings Buddy up to eye level and notices that they don’t look too good, at least from an organic. Luckily, he had been reading up on some organic medical logs lately. He remembers something about checking for human temperature. He gets a digit and places it on Buddy’s forehead. Buddy just leaned into his cold digit. Spinister knows that humans aren’t meant to be this hot.

“You’re a bit hotter than usual.”--Spinister

“Aww thanks Spins.”--Buddy

“Apparently also delusional.”--Spinister

He quickly does a search on the space google on what to do. Has a mini scare and then it’s immediate bed rest for Buddy. Sets up the human corner of the medbay for use. He grabs some small blankets and wraps Buddy up in scary precision and lays them back in the nest of pillows and blankets. Buddy is slowly roasting in the burrito blanket pile.

Spinister isn’t having that.

“Can I at least get one cover off?”--Buddy

“And have you coughing up a lung? As the humans say, ‘Fat chance’.”--Spinister

Tries his best to get Buddy some warm fluids from the soup cans in the storage unit. After 5 attempts and some help from Krok he finally gets the soup to Buddy.

“Here eat this. We don’t need your nutritional levels going down too.”—Spinister

Makes a little announcement to the crew to keep things civil for Buddy if not they are going to die. Krok has to reword his message because Grimlock and Misfire are trying to storm into the medbay.

“Buddy will die if you all disturb them while they are resting.”—Spinister

“WHAT!!!”—All the Scavengers

“Buddy! No! My human pal!”--Misfire

“They’re sick! They’re sick! That’s what Spinister means! They aren’t going to die—”--Krok

“They could though.”--Spinister

“Spinister! Not helping!”—Krok

The Scavengers do make visits through Buddy’s sick time.

Krok lets Buddy in on the news on the ship and is constantly asking if he can do something to help Buddy out physically. He is also there if they want to rant about something. He may tell some stories about his time with his former squad.

“So, what happened after that?”--Buddy

“Well, me and my old crew were up against the Wreckers…”--Krok

Crankcase visits every now and then, mainly because he is piloting the ship. Tries to hype them up to get better faster, he needs someone to distract Misfire from bothering him.

“Seriously, can’t you get better any faster? I swear Misfire is getting more annoying by the second.”--Crankcase

Fulcrum visits the least and always stands by the door.

He is still a bit squeamish about organics and it’s only increased to a 10-fold with the illness.

“How are you from over there Fulcrum?”--Buddy

“Trying not to puke honestly.”--Fulcrum

“Same here Fulcrum.”--Buddy

Grimlock and Misfire visit together and try to get Buddy to laugh as much as they can.

“C’mon Buddy not even a giggle? How else are you going to get better?”--Misfire

“What do you mean?”--Buddy

“Isn’t laughter the best medicine for you humans? Right Grimmy?”--Misfire

“Me Grimlock.”--Grimlock

“See! He gets it.”--Misfire

“In a way, I guess it works.”--Buddy

Grimlock lays down near Buddy and occasionally poke their side or move some hair out of their face. Misfire along with trying to make Buddy laugh just chats with them. He does feel bad that Buddy was confined to the bed. On one visit, Misfire tried to smuggle Buddy out of the medbay to get a change in scenery. He didn’t get 10 steps out before Spinister is on his tailpipe trying to get Buddy back in the next.

“Shhh! Keep it down!”--Misfire

“I’m sorry but you are the one being smuggled right now?”--Buddy

“Yeah, well the planets are cool to look at and I thought I’d give you the privilege of seeing them.”--Misfire

“Yeah okay… but what about Spinister?”--Buddy

“What about him?”--Misfire

“What about me?”--Spinister

“Oh Scrap! Run!”--Misfire

Spinister is on top of all of Buddy’s needs the entire time. Will go on meaningless rants from time to time when things get too boring.

“Do you have squirrels living in your head?”--Spinister

“Do I have what?”--Buddy

One time he made a mini shooting range to entertain Buddy using the guns for shoot-shoot-bang-bang. This was quickly dismantled when Krok came in for a visit, apparently a safety hazard or something.

Buddy makes a full recovery and Spinister makes remarks about not getting sick again. Spinister now always carries a spare jacket in his subspace in case Buddy forgets theirs.

“Buddy take your jacket.”--Spinister

“Spinister I don’t need it.”Buddy

“I DoN’t NeEd iT. Yeah no, you’re taking the jacket.”--Spinister

[thiswaytwoinfinity]

Emma's Epic Multi-Fandom Rec List: Oscar Isaac Edition

Work and life and everything took over for a little bit, but I am back with *part 2* of my massive fanfic recommendation list, because good lord I read so much fanfic I have a problem.

I do my best to reblog as much as possible but sometimes I miss it so this is my attempt to make up for that and give all of the amazing creators on here the credit they deserve. Thank you all so much for sharing all of your work with us. This year has been a long and difficult one for me, especially mental health wise, and being able to escape into these stories has been so valuable and important to me. 

If you read anything on here that you like, please reblog and/or comment on these pics to show the creators some love! 

AN IMPORTANT NOTE: While not everything listed here will include smut, many of these authors have 18+ blogs. Please, please, please respect their boundaries and DO NOT INTERACT WITH THEM/THEIR CONTENT IF YOU ARE A MINOR.

Stories marked with ❤️‍🔥 contain NSFW content

Moon Knight: 

The Best Kept Secrets ❤️‍🔥by @melodygatesauthor — First of all, Mel is the *queen* of Oscar Isaac-fandom fic, especially anything about our beloved Moon Boys. She’s got stuff for every genre, every mood, every random plot bunny — she’s also created some of the most fun and original character.ai bots — but I have such a soft spot for this fic, a dad’s best friend fic where each chapter is a different member of the system. 

A Bit Dodgy ❤️‍🔥by @melodygatesauthor — another brilliant one from Melody, featuring professor! Steven falling in love with a student, Jake being protective (and hot) and Marc learning to let down his walls around people. I will genuinely be a little sad when it’s all wrapped up because I’ve loved this journey. 

Cherry Pie ❤️‍🔥by @whatthefishh and @melodygatesauthor — I’m trying not to just rec people’s entire masterlists but these two make it SO DIFFICULT. Anyway, as someone with a soft spot for Steven (is it obvious yet?) this is a particularly steamy and surprisingly sweet fic about his first time. It’s written in such a brilliant way that you can just picture all of the desperate, delicious faces that Steven is making throughout and it’s just … it’s a 10/10 y’all. 

Spoiled Rotten by @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction — MARC. MARC MY BEAUTIFUL, EMOTIONALLY GUARDED BELOVED I love when Marc gets to be soft and this was such a beautifully written, real-feeling story about his relationship insecurities and his desire to be treated like the precious gift he is. If the universe could just give me one chance to spoil this beautiful man … 

Personal Time ❤️‍🔥by @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction — Look, we have already established my love for Steven Grant. I want to hug him and kiss him and let him tell me about Egyptian gods and eat vegan burritos with him and cuddle him all night. But this story? This story makes me also want to ruin him. 

The Moon Boys + Where They Like to Put It ❤️‍🔥by @ivystoryweaver — These little blurbs are pure filth and I would like them tattooed on my eyelids so that I can forever be haunted by them. There is a surprising amount of characterization packed into such a short package and that takes an incredible amount of talent. 

On My Knees ❤️‍🔥by @ivystoryweaver — Look. If Steven Grant came to me, begging on his knees (literally!) for his job back, I too would fold immediately. This two-parter is also great because the first story is pure fluff (and pining for Steven, which, i can relate) and the second brings all of the tension and anticipation to a head with some genuinely smoking hot smut. I’d also like to give a shoutout to Ivy’s Oblivious Roommate Headcanons Series, which is honestly making my obsession with everyone’s favorite gift shoppist a little worse in the best way. 

driver!jake and rich girl!reader ❤️‍🔥by @campingwiththecharmings — THIS FIC. I love the slow building tension, the gorgeous image of Jake smoking outside his limo during a night out, the SMUT. It made my brain melt in the best way, possible. 

Lessons in Touch by @marc-spectorr— Ugh, the PINING. There’s only one part to this so far and I am already so obsessed with it that I’m recommending it. I cannot wait to see where this one goes because I just am already so in love with this Steven and their relationship. 

With The Lights Out ❤️‍🔥by @moonknightly — Jake is, understandably, often characterized as the sexy, seductive one in the system so it’s such a treat to read a virgin!Jake fic. This one is so lovely, a perfect mix of vulnerable and steamy while still feeling so true to him. Basically, I love when Jake gets flustered and I need more of it. 

Friendly favors ❤️‍🔥by @runa-falls — (Not so) unrequited pining between Steven and his best friend and the ways they begin to reveal their feelings for one another by … “helping each other out” with their “needs.” Steamy and sweet in equal measure and it just makes me want to scream in the best possible way. 

Making Trouble ❤️‍🔥by @juneknight — Possessive!Marc owns me, completely. This and its sequel (where Jake gets his revenge) are two of the hottest, most wonderful smut fics that I have read in this fandom and good lord, it breaks my brain every single time I read it. juneknight is also the creator of the mind-meltingly sexy Dorm Room Marc series which is also *chef’s kiss* 

Miguel O’Hara (Spider-Verse) 

Halo ❤️‍🔥by @missdictatorme — One of the most interesting Miguel concepts I’ve ever read: Reader is Miguel’s new AI assistant (complete with hologram body) and you ask for the chance to design your own appearance. The slow build of the relationship between the pair is so fun to read and the tension between them as Miguel realizes that their relationship with one another is … unorthodox is amazing. I think about this story all the time. 

Something New ❤️‍🔥by @runa-falls — Hoooooo boy. I recommend you read this one in front of a fan or the AC because good lord this is hot. 

Decadent ❤️‍🔥by @ivystoryweaver — This one has it all: gorgeously steamy smut, the tension of a slow-burn relationship build, a hint of angst and a mystery at the center of it all: is Miguel a vampire? Or something else? Can he be cured? It’s so good and I honestly give a little squeal every time I see there’s a new chapter out. 

Punch-Out Love by @astroboots— Miguel O’Hara boxing AU? Hell yeah. This one is exciting and tense and thrilling and I was invested from the first sentence. Cici also co-wrote the iconic Every You, Every Me, which I am ashamed to say that I only just started reading but it is just as incredible as everyone said. Her stuff more than lives up to all of the hype. 

Monster ❤️‍🔥by @writefightandflightclub — Oh, you thought you’d make it through a Miguel O’Hara rec list without some size kink? This is insanely hot and a little dark and so, so good. Heed the warnings, but if this is your thing, trust me, it will sit in your brain forever. 

Assorted Oscar Characters 

Bloom For Me (Santiago Garcia) ❤️‍🔥by @whatthefishh — The Triple Frontier Regency AU that you didn’t know you needed. Trust me on this. 

Oxford Comma (Rydal Keener) ❤️‍🔥by @whatthefishh — *The* definitive Rydal fic, in my opinion. There is something about the way that Mona writes Rydal that makes him so irresistible, so charming and easy to fall for despite how much you want to resist (or maybe punch) him that I think captures the essence of the character so well. 

How (Nathan Bateman) ❤️‍🔥by @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction — Set post-Ex Machina, this lovely (and steamy) fic delves into how Nathan deals with the aftermath of the situation with Ava as well as him learning to let another person (not an android!) into his life. It’s my favorite take on a softer version of Nathan and I just adore it. (Also for more amazing Oscar-character content, Fen’s Kinktober masterlist is *chef’s kiss)

Three Years (Nathan Bateman) ❤️‍🔥by @youvebeenlivingfictional — My favorite Nathan fic, ever. The tension between him and the reader, the underlying questions about whether their whole relationship and dynamic is the result of genuine feelings on his end or just him manipulating people, the added angst of Reader’s dynamic with their friend and *her* crush on Nathan — it’s just so good. 

Somebody to Love (Richard Alonzo Munoz) ❤️‍🔥by @writefightandflightclub — Not just one of my all-time favorite Oscar Isaac fics, but one of my all-time favorite fics period. As I have previously gushed, this is a gorgeous, romantic, slow-build of a story written with such stunning imagery and poetry and with little nods to an already-familiar relationship that just makes their ultimate relationship even more swoon-worthy and perfect. And the smut is 10/10, five stars, completely mind-melting in all of the best ways. I love it, I love it, I love it. 

[noahsresources]

fluffy & cute prompts

for all your fluff needs ♡ feel free to combine prompts & change pronouns/descriptors as needed! actions are from the perspective of the sender — ‘my muse’ = sender, ‘your muse’ = receiver.

WORDS.

❝ ...where’d you get that onesie? ❞ ❝ i made a blanket fort, just for us. ❞ ❝ don’t you dare tickle me there! do not tickle me there!! ❞ ❝ you look so cute in your blanket burrito! ❞ ❝ did you eat the last piece of chocolate cake? ❞ ❝ come lay your head in my lap. ❞ ❝ i don’t wanna get up today ... let’s just stay in bed together like this... ❞ ❝ here comes the tickle monster! ❞ ❝ snuggle attack has been declared! ❞ ❝ you’re the most adorable person in the universe ... ❞ ❝ oh? is that a weak spot i found? ❞ ❝ i’m gonna snuggle you forever, i don’t even care. ❞ ❝ where’s that smile? ❞ ❝ you’re so ticklish, it’s so cute! ❞ ❝ you better get up before i jump right on you! ❞ ❝ my sweet boy/girl ... ❞ ❝ your foot is digging into my bladder and i have to pee. ❞ ❝ pillow fight! ❞ ❝ i am hereby forcing you to take my love, and there’s nothing you can do about it. ❞ ❝ if you don’t stop kicking me, i’m gonna grab that foot and tickle the shit out of it. ❞ ❝ you have ( a ) cute [ body part ] ... ❞ (specify) ❝ how long are you gonna lay on me like this? ❞ ❝ smooch attack! ❞ ❝ aww, come on! your laugh is adorable! ❞

ACTIONS.

[ draw ] — our muses share a bath together [ steam ] — our muses share a shower together [ lullaby ] — my muse sings yours a lullaby [ sing ] — your muse sings mine a lullaby [ hair ] — my muse combs their fingers through your muse’s hair [ stroke ] — your muse combs their fingers through my muse’s hair [ laugh ] — my muse mercilessly tickles your muse [ attack ] — your muse mercilessly tickles my muse [ blanket ] — my muse cuddles up to your muse wrapped up in a blanket burrito [ poke ] — my muse pokes your muse (specify where) [ prod ] — your muse pokes my muse (specify where) [ warm ] — your muse cuddles up to my muse wrapped up in a blanket burrito [ sling ] — while cuddling, my muse wraps their leg around your muse’s hips [ wrap ] — while cuddling, your muse wraps their leg around my muse’s hips [ peck ] — my muse kisses a part of your muse’s body (specify where) [ smooch ] — your muse kisses a part of my muse’s body (specify where) [ merciless ] — my muse blows a raspberry on your muse [ blow ] — your muse blows a raspberry on my muse [ gaze ] — my muse sits in your muse’s lap and gazes at them longingly [ dear ] — your muse sits in my muse’s lap and gazes at them longingly

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

Do my symptoms align with autism?

I’ve been looking into whether I might be autistic recently. I’m not self-diagnosing. I just suspect I might have autism, and I wanted to put this here to see what other people think.

Reasons why I think I am:

1. Stimming

This is definitely the main one. I think I stim way more than a neurotypical would, even when I was a kid. I pace, I walk in circles, I spin around over and over and over and over again and I don’t really get dizzy. I especially like to listen to music while doing this.

Before spinning in circles, I used to pace around in circles with my hands clenched together. It sort of helped me focus and think and daydream.

I do the spinning thing multiple times a day, and if I’m forced to go a few days without it, I get antsy and a little frustrated. (When I spin, I do it on the hardwood floor, keeping my balance by placing my hands on the back of the couch, and doing it on carpet is a lot harder. This is my favorite “type” of stim, so if I’m on a vacation where we’re at a hotel without hardwood floors, that’s why I can’t do it sometimes. But then I will anyway on carpet because I just have to.)

I do tend to rock when I’m by myself — or, swaying is more like it, but yeah, rocking too. I’ll sway a bit more than I will rock.

I’m literally pacing in circles as I type this out lol.

2. Hyperfixations/special interests

(Are those the same thing, or two different things? Please correct me if they’re classified as different things.)

I have what I’d call special interests — gender, Amphibia, Dork Diaries. I look up genders and try to learn as much about them as possible, everyday.

For Amphibia and Dork Diaries, I usually just read fanfic or write my own. The other thing I do a lot is daydreaming, though, and those are the top 2 things I daydream about. I’m constantly in my head, and I’m usually daydreaming in the back of my mind, like, all day. (About those two things.)

The thing about my hyperfixations are that I don’t talk to other people about them. (I don’t like talking in general, really.) I just keep them to myself and learn about them/daydream about them by myself. I never felt a need to share and I don’t infodump on people.

3. Fidgeting

I’m not sure if this is the same as stimming, but I’m separating these two.

Usually when I’m sitting still, I’m fidgeting. I’ll be tapping my pencil or foot 90% of the time. I do it a lot, and I don’t even notice sometimes when I do.

I don’t know where to put this either, but I also bite my nails. I don’t just bite them either, I pick them off. It calms me down and helps me relax or gives me something to do when I’m nervous or just plain bored. (I’m well aware this isn’t healthy, please don’t attack me in the comments section.)

4. Procrastination (executive dysfunction?)

I know lots of people procrastinate, but I think what I experience lines up more with executive dysfunction. (Which I’ve learned is also a trait of ADHD, so I don’t know if I have that instead.)

It’s so so hard to focus on a school task or something that’s boring. Or even something that’s exciting, like writing on a fanfic or book, I procrastinate on so much. I set plans to do things but I don’t get them done. Even when it’s something stupidly easy to do, sometimes I just don’t do it. And when it’s hard, when I don’t even know where to start, it’s nearly impossible to start. (I usually force myself to get it done anyway, with big projects, but with smaller things and little homework assignments, I don’t always do. Then I kick myself for it later.)

5. Routine

I eat the same food every day for lunch, at school. (Uncrustables sandwich, yogurt, applesauce, and/or yogurt with m&m toppings I can put it in.) At home, I eat different foods for lunch — I make my own cheese burrito when we have soft shell tacos and shredded cheese. If that isn’t available, I make cheese sandwiches. If that isn’t available, sometimes I remember other things that are quick and easy to make for lunch — like pizza rolls. And if I don’t have that either, sometimes I’ll just skip lunch entirely. Or eat a small snack that doesn’t require effort to make whatsoever, but it’s usually not enough to qualify for “lunch”.

I don’t wear the same clothes everyday, but I never go shopping. I could wear the same clothes for years and be fine with it (as long as I’ve not outgrown them). The only time I get new clothes is when I see a shirt I really like. Which is usually Stitch (Lilo and Stitch, anyone?)

It’s really hard to break routine.

So there’s this thing at my school, where you can tutor/help out at an elementary school for service hours, and eventually get a scholarship to a 2-year college. The scholarship thing is major.

It took me months just to email the teacher and ask when I could come in. I’m probably severely behind on my volunteer hours. And the stupid thing is, now it’s not even hard. I just went on the first day, and it was established that I would do it every day, so there wasn’t a way I could back out anyway. And now I go and it’s no problem. It’s so stupid.

6. Social Situations

I might have social anxiety, I don’t know. I get anxious at the thought of new situations, having to meet new people, etc. I heavily dislike talking to people I don’t know. It’s why I prefer not to talk to the cashier at McDonald’s, or rehearse what I’m going to say at the restaurant.

When people ask, “Hi, how are you?”, I answer “Good, how are you?” They say something back, maybe mention a tiny bit of what’s going on in their lives, and then it’s over. For that, I have a pre-recorded answer. For other situations, as I’ll mention later, I’m actually mostly comfortable.

I speak pretty softly, and sometimes I have to force myself to a louder volume.

7. I prefer to do things on my own

I’m independent in a lot of ways, unless I need help. (And, um, not financially independent or anything, I still live with my parents.) And even when I need help, like with homework, it’s hard to let other people help me sometimes. I prefer doing things on my own.

Reasons why I think I’m not:

1. I’m fine at social interaction.

I usually pick up on social cues, and communication has never been much of an issue for me. (Sometimes I will sort of freeze up or trail off when talking, and suddenly my brain won’t make my mouth say things. Aside from that, I communicate well.) I understand that bad social interaction was a pretty big indicator of autism, but I’m not bad at it, really.

Actually, the one difference from this is that I do have pretty bad eye contact. I try to look at people’s eyes when talking because it’s polite, but then I look away, and then I look back, and then I look away, and I don’t know how long I’m supposed to maintain eye contact before looking away again. I don’t like it.

I am deaf, and I wear Cochlear Implants for me to hear. My social interaction is affected by this, as noisy situations are notoriously difficult for me to hear in. I’m asking “What?” multiple times a day lol. Sometimes I can’t hear a word the other kid is saying in school, and I just smile and nod because that’s all I can do, because it’s just too noisy. (I’m throwing this out here in case it’s something you might need to take into consideration, but it is completely unrelated to any potential autism.)

2. I don’t have hypersensitivity (I don’t think so)

Loud sounds don’t really bother me, nor do bright lights, or textures, or certain flavors or whatever. I eat the same thing a lot because of routine, not because of uncomfortable flavors or food textures. I think there have been times when everything was just a little too much. Then I usually find the nearest bathroom to calm myself down in. I don’t know if this is overstimulation or not, tho. Or if it’s specific to neurodivergency, or just me being an introvert and getting overwhelmed by people. And it’s not that often at all.

3. Very little aggression

I know that like a lot of things, autism is a spectrum. One of the symptoms is aggression, and I have very little of that. Usually when I’m frustrated with homework and my mom’s trying to help, I’ll get snappish with her (and then apologize later, because she wasn’t doing anything wrong and only trying to help).

Sometimes I do feel really mad, but I just grit my teeth and deal with it internally instead of lashing out. Like arguing in my head until I’ve calmed down and moved on.

4. Meltdowns/Shutdowns

I’m fairly sure I don’t have either of these. I think that’s also a major autism thing, one that I don’t have.

Things That I Can’t Put Into a Category Because I Don’t Know Whether It’s Indicative of Autism or Literally Just a Me Thing:

• Repeating words and phrases: I don’t do that out loud, but I will in my head

• Vocal stims: I very rarely do these, and if I do hum or make a noise, it’s usually entirely involuntary, usually because I was excited. I don’t mean to

• Repeating words: I very rarely do that also, but it has happened before. (It happened today once, when we were playing a game. Nothing came of it, it wasn’t weird, I just repeated a word my mom said — I can’t remember what it was, not a bad one though)

• Facial expression: I don’t think I have a blank-face that many autistic people do. I’m often smiling when I’m happy, or laughing at things that are funny. (Which aren’t even that funny to other people. Sarcasm makes me laugh a lot. I laugh a lot more easily than other people do.) I feel like occasionally it is hard to force myself into a facial expression if I’m not feeling that way

• Unusual posture: I literally just looked this up. I’m basically running through all of the autism symptoms and explaining mine, and this is one of them. I think I might have unusual posture. One of the things is shifting all your weight into one leg, and that’s something I definitely do, especially when I have to stand still. (And whenever I have to stand really still, and I’m not putting all weight into one leg, sometimes my knees will lock, and it’ll make me light-headed. I almost passed out one time from doing that. Never again.) I don’t really know if my posture is unusual aside from that. It might be and I just never noticed. Or it might not. I don’t know.

• Clumsiness: I never considered myself clumsy, but my brother has told me that he thinks I am. (Considering he’s my younger brother and says a lot of stuff to annoy me, take this with a grain of salt.)

• Oh, speaking of: metaphors. I think for the most part I understand them. Like grain of salt. And if I don’t, then I look it up.

• Sarcasm: kind of hit or miss with me. Sometimes I think my brain knows the other person is being sarcastic, because there’s just no way they’re serious about what they just said. But my brain makes me treat it like they are being serious, especially if their tone sounds serious. It’s hard to tell sometimes. But when I do get sarcasm, when their tone sounds obviously sarcastic, then usually it’s funny and makes me laugh

• I don’t like being away from home for a long time. Even a week gets me extremely homesick, and it feels like it’s getting worse as I get older. Maybe because I know I’ll have to move out eventually, or move away to college. Moving away for college, or moving out and far away, TERRIFIES me. This may not be an autistic thing, but I don’t know, so I put it here. Maybe it’s because my routine and my whole life would be upended. I don’t know.

• Speaking in monotone: Much like my facial expressions, I feel like I speak pretty “normally”. I don’t have a monotone voice usually. (I feel like sometimes I do, though? Not often)

• Putting pressure on the front of your feet: Apparently that’s a thing. I don’t think I do that. I don’t think I’ve done that in the past

• Decision-making: Related to the executive dysfunction thing. I think I put off big decisions. (I‘ve only somewhat-but-not-really decided which college I’m going to. And I might change my mind.)

• Sometimes when I try to joke, people think I’m being rude. I don’t know if that’s a tone issue on my part, or if the joke is in poor taste or seems more mean than just a joke (when I only ever intended for it to be a joke). Also for clarification, none of my jokes are ever racist or homophobic or anything, and I never try to be mean when I joke

• Special object: I don’t think I have one, unless you consider my phone. I don’t go anywhere without it lol. But like little things to fidget with, that bring me comfort, I don’t really have that. I just fidget with my hands, I guess.

• Verbal Instructions: Those are really hard for me to follow. If I only have verbal instructions and not readable ones, you can bet it’s a lot harder to get the thing done. I usually need a lot of clarification or things repeated to me, although that’s partially due to deafness. (I don’t think entirely, though.)

Other things about me that may or may not be relevant/important for you to know:

- I am aroace (no sexual or romantic attraction for anyone)

- I think I’m aplatonic too, and mostly anattractional (or grey-attractional, if that’s a thing). Online friends are easier for me than irl friends. I don’t even know what qualifies as a friendship

- I’m deaf (but I already explained that). I do hear with my Cochlear Implants, but I know it’s not that exact same as hearing people. I don’t know if that’s why I’m not as hypersensitive to loud sounds, or if I’m just not hypersensitive at all. (I don’t think this is something you could help clarify, though, seeing as it’s specific to me.)

I have taken a few autism tests and gotten answers like “you have moderate autism symptoms” or even “high symptoms” sometimes. For ADHD, the test answers ranged from “No” to “Potentially” to “Moderate ADHD”. (Don’t worry, I know that the tests aren’t meant to be substituted for the real thing. I just took them to try and see where I fit, if there were any indicators, etc.)

I am planning to talk to my mom soon and see if it’s possible for me to get a diagnosis. Things aren’t too hard for me right now, but I am getting older and I genuinely don’t know how I’m going to live on my own — which isn’t entirely related to this, but I feel like if I need help, I should get diagnosed as soon as possible. (If I have it at all.)

Basically, my reason for posting this was to get a second opinion, especially from people who are autistic themselves. Does this sound like autism or ADHD or something else entirely? (Is it possible to have both that have symptoms that cancel each other out?) Am I just neurotypical, but like, weird?

I want to be clear, I know you can’t diagnose me and I should see a professional. I just wanted a second opinion, in case it’s just me overthinking everything.

Also, I’m so sorry for this being so long. It’s probably a pain to read. I’m just trying to be as specific as possible.

Hi there,

I’m sorry I’m just getting to this. My goodness this was a long inbox! Lol.

This was very thorough and detailed, so it was nice to read. Nice formatting too.

I would say some traits align. But like you said, I’m not a professional. So I can’t really say. I’m curious about what my followers think too. Hopefully some chime in.

I would recommend writing what you told me here down to bring with you during an assessment, if you have one. This will be very helpful when determining a diagnosis. As it’s very detailed and thorough.

Hopefully this helps. Thank you for the inbox. I hope you have a wonderful day/night. ♥️

[ctitan98official]

@the-night-owl-blr : Gello! Sooooo Y/n is toying around with the potions again and she "accidentally" drank another potion BUT instead of having her personality change I want her voice to change, like into something deep, Corpse husband deep and i wanna see the R8 ladies reaction to it. (Im very much inlove with your vlog do I might request/ask often)

Haha! That’s a good idea! So glad you enjoy my blog :) Read the post this ask is talking about here! Reader, as usual, is gender neutral. Let’s get into it!

Y/N: *Once again messing around in Miranda’s lab*

Miranda: *Keeping a close eye on Y/N as she works, doesn’t want a repeat of the personality swap potion incident, gave Y/N some busy work to keep them occupied* Now, Y/N. You keep organizing those nuts and bolts… It’s very important to my research.

Y/N: You got it, Mother Miranda! *Picks up the pace of their sorting*

Miranda’s doorbell: *Rings*

Miranda: Damn it! I think that might be my Postmates… Y/N, whatever you do, don’t stop organizing, okay?

Y/N: Yes, Mother Miranda!

Miranda: *Satisfied that Y/N is thoroughly distracted, leaves*

Y/N: *Waits for Miranda to be out of earshot, laughs and rubs their hands together* Now, what kind of chaos can I cause today?

Y/N: *Looks through various experiments, finds a bright green potion, can’t resist drinking the forbidden Gatorade*

Miranda: *Comes back into the lab*

Y/N: *Runs back to their spot quickly, starts sorting the nuts and bolts again*

Miranda: *Stuffs a huge burrito in her face, bits of food fly out of her mouth while she talks* Everything okay in here?

Y/N: *Disgusted, nods their head*

Miranda: *Satisfied, snarfs her burrito*

Y/N: *Trying to see if they feel any different, annoyed when nothing seems to be out of the ordinary, decides to just call it a day and head home* Mother Miranda, I’m gonna go back to the castle now. *Voice is like 3 times lower than it normally is, eyes widen in surprise*

Mother Miranda: *Stares at Y/N, loud eating halts, rice and chicken smeared all over her face* Y/N? What’s wrong with your voice?

Y/N: *Totally freaked out, starts inching towards the door so Miranda doesn’t find out what they did* Oh… Um, I think it’s just a head cold. Bye now!

Miranda: *Narrows her eyes at Y/N, wipes her mouth, grabs Y/N by the arm to keep them from leaving, rolls her eyes* Aww. Poor little thing. You don’t mind if I give you a quick check-up do you?

Y/N: *Cringes* U-um, I’m totally fine, Mother Miranda! I’m gonna go home and eat some soup!

Miranda: *Pushes Y/N into a chair and ties them up* I know you took one of my potions again, you little idiot! Which one was it? I want to make sure your eyeballs don’t pop out of their sockets or something.

Y/N: *Horrified, yells* Why do you have a potion that can do that?!

Miranda’s front door: *Bursts open to reveal the Dimi sisters*

Cass: Y/N! Grab your shit we’re taking you home!

Miranda: Girls! We’re in the lab!

The Dimi sisters: *Swarm to where Y/N and Mother Miranda are*

Bela: *Takes one look at Y/N tied up, sighs* What did they do this time, Mother Miranda?

Miranda: *Glaring at Y/N* They took another one of my potions, but they won’t tell me which one.

Dani: I’ll take care of this! *Mercilessly tickles Y/N’s sides* Tell us what we want to know!

Y/N: *Busts out laughing in a deep man’s voice* Haha! Stop it, Dani! I’m gonna piss myself!

The Dimi sisters: *All freeze at what they just heard*

Dani: Wow! Can you do the “Luke, I am your father.” line?! PLEEEEAASSEEE!

Y/N: *Laughs* Luke, I am your father!

Cass and Dani: *Very impressed, clap their hands in approval*

Bela: *Rolls her eyes*

Miranda: *Doesn’t get the reference* You sired a child named Luke?!

The Dimi sisters and Y/N: *Turn to Miranda in outrage* You uncultured swine!

Miranda: *Surprised by the visceral reaction, groans* You know what? All of you get out of my lab. Y/N, if you haven’t become violently ill by now you’ll probably be fine.

Cass: *Cuts Y/N out of the chair*

The Dimi sisters and Y/N: *Start heading home*

Dani: *Keeps making Y/N say funny things in their new voice*

The Dimi sisters and Y/N: *See Donna out for a walk*

Bela: *Giggles and whispers a bad pick-up line for Y/N to tell Donna*

Y/N: *Smiles and nods*

Donna: *Sees the group and walks over to say hello* Good evening, everyone.

The Dimi sisters: *Say hello*

Y/N: *Grins at Donna* Your hand looks heavy… Can I hold it for you?

Donna: *Has a bit of an involuntary fit, cheeks burning* Y/N, w-why would you s-say that! And what’s w-wrong with your v-voice?!

Y/N: *Laughs* Some stupid potion I took at Mother Miranda’s. No big deal though.

Donna: *Asks something non-intelligible because she’s so quiet*

Y/N: *Raises on eyebrow* Sorry, what did you say?

Donna: *Blushes harder, but repeats her question, louder this time* W-would you s-sing “That’s Amore”? *Squeaks in embarrassment and hides her face in her hands*

Y/N: Oh! I know that song! *Clears their throat* When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie that’s amore!

Donna: *Immediately faints from the ASMR tingles*

The Dimi sisters and Y/N: *Look at each other and shrug, the group makes a detour to drop Donna off at her house*

Angie: *Fucking shocked*

The Dimi sisters and Y/N: *Finally get back home*

Y/N: You three go in and tell your mother we’re home. I’ve got a surprise for Alci! *Chuckles and runs off*

A few minutes later

Y/N: *Kicks the door to Alcina’s bedroom open, wearing a cowboy hat, starts singing* Baby lock them doors and turn the lights down low!

Alcina: *Alarmed because she heard a man-thing’s voice, smacks Y/N through a wall*

Y/N: *Groans, lying in the rubble, rubs their head* Alci! It’s me!

Alcina: How dare you call me by that name! Only my spouse is allowed to call me that! *Unsheathes her claws*

Y/N: *Takes off the cowboy hat, holds their hands up in surrender* Alci, babe, it’s me, Y/N! *Shows that they’re wearing their wedding ring*

Alcina: *Eyes widen* Y/N? What happened to you?! Why do you sound like this?!

Y/N: *Dusts themself off, stands up* Well, I took another potion at Miranda’s, hehe… But hopefully it will wear off soon!

Alcina: *Snarls, picks Y/N up by the collar* You buffoon! Now you’re in trouble!

Y/N: *Gulps, scared* Um, is there going to be a punishment or something??

Alcina: *Smirks* Yes! It’s been so long since I’ve had someone with a deep voice to sing a duet with. You’re going to sing whatever I tell you to!

Y/N: That doesn’t sound too bad!

The next morning

Y/N: *Voice is completely gone, Alcina’s still making them sing, about to pass out*

Alcina: *Lounging in her bed, smoking a cigarette* One more verse of “I got rhythm”, draga!

Y/N: *Falls on the floor face-first*

Masterlist

[the-demonus-aunt]

You don’t have to answer if uncomfortable:

Tw: mentions of SA

Could you do a head cannon on the bros reactions to Mc telling them that they were r@ped in their past relationship with their ex? (I’m healing from this btw)

Hey! I hope you're doing alright and that you have all the support you need!

I tried my best to make this comforting. I hope this is what you wanted and that it maybe helps a little, even for a moment.

That said, I will be honest: I am lucky to be able to say that nothing like that has happened to me. I know this is a sensitive topic. So if there's something in here that you wish were different or that I need to change, please let me know and I will adapt it!

CN Sexual abuse. Implied violence.

How the brothers would react to you telling them you've been r*ped in a past relationship

Belphie

Listens silently, eyes fixated a bit too intensely on you

He'd bite his lip and swallow his anger for a minute in order to be there for you

Probably proceeds to wrap you up into a blanket burrito

Will pat your head while you watch movies together to calm down

Random kisses on your forehead and  staring off into the void with rage in his face

When you nod off, a timer on your ex's life goes off.

Belphie will be back before you wake up, though

"I'll protect you from now on. Nothing like that will ever happen to you again."

Beel

Good boi does not know what to say

Probably forgot to keep chewing whatever he was eating at the moment

He's hurting with you but needs a moment to think about how to react

Then you find yourself in the biggest hug you've ever experienced

It's the perfect mix of gentleness and intensity - the ideal comfort hug

He'll order one of everything from Hell's Kitchen because food is his comfort so why wouldn't it help you to feel better right now

He's gonna be so gentle with you from now on

Probably unsure of how to interact with you, once he starts thinking about what that means for you

A good long conversation about your boundaries and needs takes his insecurity away, though

"I hope you know you can always talk to me. I'll be there for you the same way you always are for us."

Asmo

This man is shocked to his core

As the Avatar of Lust, he's not only big on s*x, but especially consent

He's so fucking mad

He will show his gentle side instead, though

Asmo will immediately iniate a conversation about what is okay for you, what isn't and how you want him to behave with you

He'll follow your wishes to the letter, making a big point of showing how much he cares about respecting your boundaries

Might take you shopping or organise a self-care day to make you feel good about yourself and hype you up

Worships you in any way possible, because that's how he deals with his own shock and anger

"I can only imagine what it must feel like. I hope you know that you're so beautiful and strong and brave and you will come out on top of this, love."

Satan

Well, he is the Avatar of Wrath

Will probably excuse himself for a few minutes to rage about in an unoccupied room

When he returns, he still has a hard time holding back

Firm hugs and kisses on the top of your head, while holding you

Might want to kill your ex, but will hold back because he knows the consequences that might follow

Researches psychological effects of SA in the library

The conversation about your wants and needs follows a few days later

"Thank you so much for trusting me enough to tell me this. What can I do to make you as comfortable as possible around us?"

Levi

He does not know how to handle the situation

Will not touch you in any way until you literally ask him to (if you want him to)

He will cry as soon as he's alone because a) he feels your pain and b) he's so helpless and yet so desperate to help you

Will look up what to do on his D.D.D. but is smart enough to know that he cannot necessarily trust the answers

Might ask you what to do after a few days and will not think about anything else in the meantime

"So what does this mean exactly? I don't want to do anything wrong. Can I hug you? Do would even want me to?"

Mammon

Swallows hard and gets very silent suddenly

This demon will go after your ex unless you explicitly tell him not to

But before that, he will make sure your every need is met

Ruffling you hair randomly, making sure you've eaten regularly, doing your homework for you when you're having a rough day

He might be too tsundere for hugs and cuddles - unless you ask for it, then you'll be in his arms faster than he can call himself The Great Mammon

Will probably not immediately think to ask about your boundaries but will try his best to put himself in your position and think about what is okay and what isn't

Might ask about specific behaviours of his once he's had time to think

"Don'cha worry anymore. The Great Mammon is here to make everything better. Just tell me what ya need!"

Lucifer

Clenching his teeth, gripping his pen too hard, noticeably controlled breathing

He'll pull himself together for you

Wants to know every detail you're comfortable telling him because he wants to understand you

The conversation naturally swaps over into discussing your boundaries and needs

The right hand man of the future King of the Devildom knows better than to kill a human

But Lucifer knows a plethora of curses.

Let's just say your ex will never be happy again in their unfortunately long life

Will never tell you about it, though

If you're okay with it, he'll become very touchy: squeezing your hand under the table, brushing you hair out of your face, putting his arm around you when you're sitting next to each other on the sofa

If not, he will make sure to show you he's there for you in other ways: checking in on you regularly, helping you with your homework, bringing you human lavender tea in the evening to help you fall asleep

"You did not deserve what happened to you. Please know I will do everything in my power to undo the damage they did to you."

[acetheidiotinacloset]

TADC Incorrect Quotes (Zooble Edition)

That piece of art is still in the works, but I still feel guilty that Zooble didn't get the attention they deserve in the previous post, so here, take a bunch of incorrect quotes with Zooble in them :)

Jax: I wanna die.  Zooble: We all do, you aren't special

Ragatha: Can you recommend a book that'll make me cry?  Zooble: General Mathematics 8th Grade Edition

Zooble: I'm not funny, I'm just really mean and people think I'm joking.

Jax: Did you miss me while I was gone?  Zooble: You were gone?

Zooble: Tired of just deserving better. Gonna start taking it by force.

Computer: Please enter a password.  Zooble: *types in Jax*  Computer: Your password is too weak.  Zooble: KNEW IT-

Zooble: I started school with straight A’s. Now I’m not even straight.

Zooble: And then they ran into my knife. They ran into my knife ten times.  Ragatha: You mean you stabbed them!?  Zooble: They ran into my knife.

Jax, handing a balloon to Zooble : I have no soul. Have a good day!  Zooble, walking off: I don't have one either.

Ragatha: Are you sure Jax’s going to be able to handle that IKEA furniture? They’re not very good with technical stuff…  Zooble: Why are you worried? IKEA was never complicated; these days, it’s even easier! Everything’s color coded, numbered, and there’s even an assembly robot option to make it even easier for Jax, which we’ve obviously opted in for. All they need to do is press the clearly labeled ON button, scan the QR code on the front of the box, and it’ll take care of the rest. Even a monkey could do it!  *Zooble’s phone rings*  Jax: Hey, so I’m at Lowes…  Ragatha: …  Ragatha: I should have gone with the monkey.

Bonus: (these ones doesn't have Zooble in it, I just found them funny)

Pomni: Do you even know what an amulet is?  Jax: Of course I do! I eat amulets sometimes. I like the ones with cheese and onions!  Pomni: Jax, those are omelettes.  Jax: Oh. Then I’ve got nothing.

Ragatha: You shouldn't be using a straw.  Jax: I know, I know, it's bad for the environment and stuff.  Ragatha: Yeah, but I mean... it's a weird way to eat spaghetti.

Kinger, holding an antique bottle: Is this whiskey or perfume?  Jax: *grabs and chugs the entire bottle*  Jax:  Jax: It's perfume.

Caine: I am Caine, I speak for the trees. Chop them down and I snap your knees.

Jax, holding up their class notes: And then this doodle of a burrito because when I first read Aristotle, I thought it was pronounced like “Chipotle”.  Jax, in shock: Wait a minute, is it “Chip-o-tottle”?

[easytobevegan]

Low-Calorie Vegan Meals for Weight Loss

As someone who is actively trying to lose weight, I have recently been scouring the internet for healthy, low-calorie vegan recipes to make when I’m not busy exercising or saving health posts on Pinterest. While vegan diets are typically healthier than those that include meat or other animal products, there is still a lot of high-calorie, high-fat, highly processed junk food that is vegan friendly. On my weight loss journey, I have cut out nearly all processed junk food (with the occasional slip up because I am weak on my period) and am determined to maintain a healthy diet. Weight loss has never come easy for me, and it has only gotten harder with added health problems that slow down my metabolism and medicines that cause weight gain. Though I believe everyone is valid no matter their weight, I am not personally happy in my body; I feel sluggish and heavy and just plain unhealthy. So, if you are looking to lose weight like me, diet is a good place to start. Therefore, without further ado, here are some low-calorie, easy to make vegan recipes that can aid you on your weight loss journey:

Healthy Vegan Breakfast Cookies from It Doesn’t Taste Like Chicken (203 kcal)

Tofu Scramble: Breakfast of (Vegan) Champions from It Doesn’t Taste Like Chicken (175 kcal)

Slow Cooker Italian Chickpeas {Vegan} from Cookin Canuck (187.8 kcal)

Healthy Vegan Bean Burritos from Wallflower Kitchen (342 kcal)

Healthy Basil Pesto from Elephantastic Vegan (122 kcal)

Strawberry Chia Oatmeal Cookies from Live Eat Learn (94 kcal)

Low Calorie Fried Rice from Cheap Lazy Vegan (235 kcal)

Spicy Indian Tofu Red Quinoa Salad from My Plantiful Cooking (197 kcal)

Easy Plant-Based Stuffed Peppers from Nutriciously (394 kcal)

Easy Vegan Tian (Baked Ratatouille) from Nutriciously (224 kcal)

Sheet Pan Crispy Teriyaki Tofu and Broccoli from Recipe Runner (209 kcal)

Lentil Vegetable Soup from The Garden Grazer (164 kcal)

Roasted Cauliflower Salad with Lemon Tahini Dressing from Budget Bytes (374 kcal)

Easy Italian Zucchini Stew from Skinny Spatula (199 kcal)

Chia Breakfast Pudding from Hurry The Food Up (158 kcal)

Sweet Potato Waffles from Yum Vegan Lunch Ideas (205 kcal)

Vegetarian Yaki Udon (Japanesse Fried Noodles) from The Veg Connection (150 kcal)

Vegetable Stelline Soup from Skinny Spatula (163 kcal)

[satans-helper]

Reaching for Stardust - Part XIII

Read Looking for Space here / Playlists / Read RFS on Wattpad

Word Count: ~3700

Warnings: none

Apologies for the delay. I got sick for two weeks (it's like this fic foreshadowed my life...jk) and didn't want to let my writing get too far behind <3

---

“I feel like shit, mama,” Josh grumbled, the words muffled by the thick quilt that was swaddled around him. He let out a huff and pulled some of it away from his face, tired, slightly red-rimmed eyes looking at me. “This is not how I wanted to spend the holiday break.”

“I mean, it kind of worked out for me,” I admitted, setting my laptop on the coffee table. “I have a valid excuse for not having Thanksgiving with my parents.” Normally I’d be in our little office space but with Josh suffering from the flu, I was working from the couch or our bed. It was a difficult time with Josh feeling so rough–the poor thing was exhausted and sore, feverish with a scratchy, sore throat. At least it wasn’t anything worse. Normally Josh’s colds only lasted a few days and I figured the flu wouldn’t be much different. A week at most, probably. And I hoped I wouldn’t get sick in turn. 

“That’s fair. We’ll see them for Christmas,” Josh agreed, eyes becoming half-closed while he tucked himself in tighter in the blanket burrito. 

“No–I’m spending it at your place this year, remember?” 

Josh shook his head. “Not if you miss Thanksgiving. Your folks will never let you miss Christmas with them if you’re skipping that.”

“Let’s not even think about that right now,” I told him, checking the clock on my laptop–just over an hour and I could clock out. I leaned over the center cushion to gently feel his forehead. “You still feel warm, Josh. How does your body feel now?”

Eyes now fully closed, he answered, “Cold.” He let out a ragged cough, then added, “But I was hot a few minutes ago so. I dunno.”

“I’d really like you to eat something,” I told him, brushing my fingers through his hair. “You were worried about being too big for the suit, now I’m worried you’ll be too small.” Although that almost seemed impossible given how small he already appeared to be, wrapped up and tucked in like that on the couch.

“A popsicle?” he proposed, blinking slowly at me. “Preferably purple, please?”

“How about a purple popsicle while I heat up some soup for you?”

Josh nodded. “Stupendous.”

I stood up, taking one last, long, good look at him before I had to migrate to the kitchen. “You know, Josh–you are so adorable when you’re sick. I mean, I hate that you’re sick. But no one else I know ever looks this delectable when they’re ill.”

“I’m on the mend,” Josh croaked in protest, hunkering down even more, just the top half of his face visible. 

“I know you are, baby,” I assured him, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. I grabbed a grape popsicle from the freezer and delivered it to him before I left him to doze on his own for a few minutes. It was time to get some chicken noodle soup warmed up.

When I returned, Josh had set one of the tray tables in front of himself and was no longer fully cocooned in the blanket. I tutted my disapproval as I set the bowl and spoon down in front of him: “I was gonna get that for you. You’re supposed to rest.” 

“I am resting,” Josh assured me, but the rough croak of his voice told me he definitely needed more. He shifted to the edge of the couch and stirred the soup with his spoon, then looked at me as I sat down next to him, pulling my laptop back to the tops of my thighs. “Getting any honeymoon inspiration?”

Honestly, I was feeling too preoccupied all around to be taking anything as inspiration. The holidays were upon us, adding to stress, and I’d spent more time trying to find ideas for Danny’s birthday gift than doing any actual work. “Not really,” I told him with a sigh. “I think I could go just about anywhere though.”

“Somewhere warm,” Josh said, lifting the spoon to his mouth.

“Somewhere warm would be good,” I concurred, checking the time again. With what I had left, I decided to get back to my actual project while Josh dutifully ate his little lunch and zoned out with cartoons. He spent the rest of the day like that, only getting up to go to the bathroom once, which told me he needed a lot more fluids than what he was getting.

It was a long, slow, tired sort of day. When bedtime rolled around, I grabbed a Gatorade from the fridge and gave it to Josh as he was slowly getting up from the couch. “Can you drink like, half of this before we go to bed, please?”

He nodded. “Okay, mama.” He took a long sip, wincing as he swallowed. “Ugh. My chest hurts.”

A little ripple of concern ran through my own chest. “Really? What’s it feel like?”

“Kind of sharp, I guess.” He put a hand over his chest and inhaled deeply, then winced again. “Yeah. What’s that about?”

I don’t know,” I said slowly, watching his shoulders rise and fall. “But that doesn’t sound good. Let me take your temperature again.” I grabbed the thermometer from the bathroom and slipped it under his tongue; Josh leaned against the counter, shrouded in the throw blanket from the couch, and waited. After a minute, I took it out and, upon reading the numbers, felt my jaw go slack. “Oh, my god, Josh. It’s 102. That’s higher than yesterday.”

Josh brought my hand down to peer at it himself. “Shit, really?”

I set it on the counter and put my hands on his shoulders. “Promise me that if it’s the same–or worse–in the morning, we’ll go to the ER.” Josh instantly, silently balked, rolling his eyes and sighing; I was having none of it. “Promise me. I’m just gonna drag you anyway. You’re not strong enough to fight me off.”

A little hoarse laugh came from his scratchy throat. “Okay, okay. But it’s gonna get better.” He grabbed the Gatorade again and headed towards the bedroom. “This has to be the worst of it, darling.”

I was hopeful of that but was finding it hard to relax once we were in bed. Josh curled up and wiggled against my front; I laid one arm over him and draped my leg over his, listening to him breathe. It didn’t take long for him to fall asleep, though I was stuck lying awake in the dark with racing thoughts and worry hammering in my heart. Having a cold was one thing. Coming down with the flu was another but still not something most people had to worry about, right? But such a high fever and that chest pain. That worried me. Jake had a really bad case of the flu once that took him out for weeks, I remembered that. Sam had too. Was it a Kiszka thing? It was weird, I thought as I shifted in bed, trying to adjust without jostling Josh too much, when it seemed like all of them would have super robust immune systems. I could remember the time Danny had strep and Sam caught it, of course, and Sam’s experience seemed a lot worse than his counterpart had. I tried not to worry. I tried to just close my eyes and match my breathing to Josh’s, to remember that it would be a new day soon enough.

But in the morning, all of that worry returned tenfold. Josh looked pale, his cough had become worse and he was shivering from the moment we got up. The first thing I did was grab the thermometer and stick it under his tongue again.

“Alright, let’s go,” I said, hopping into action as soon as I saw the little red line hit 104. “Hospital time.”

Josh huffed raggedly and stayed frozen on the edge of the bed. “Do we have to?”

“Please, Josh?” I asked while I fluttered about the bedroom to gather necessities–his phone and wallet, our chargers, a clean pair of socks. Who knew how long we were going to wait there for, so I grabbed a tote bag from the closet and started piling other things into it–books, earbuds, Josh’s notebook and pens. 

“You’re really worried,” he noted while I buzzed about him, and that made me stop to really feel that worry sink into my gut. 

“Yeah, I am. This isn’t getting better,” I told him, turning away to return to the closet. “And I need you to be okay.” I at least needed to get dressed before we left, then I needed to email work. I could do that from the hospital though, I concluded, and rifled through hangers to find my favorite hoodie. 

“I’m okay, darling,” Josh said, coming up to my side and rubbing my back. “Will you feel better if I finish that Gatorade?”

“Yes,” I said with a chuckle. 

He lifted an arm and sniffed himself. “I smell ripe. Can I shower before we go?” 

“Okay. But I’m gonna sit in there with you in case you need help,” I said, expecting to get push-back, but Josh smirked, looking pleased. 

In the bathroom, I sat on the closed toilet, bouncing my leg with unyielding nervous energy. While Josh sudsed himself up, I texted the boys to let them know what was happening and their responses only fueled my fears, not in the sense that I was actually expecting the worst–because that would never happen–but in the sense of it had become something to actually share. Something to make everyone else aware of.

Not even Josh announcing, “I feel better already!” as the hot water pounded over him could shake my concerns. Everyone felt better in the shower while sick, but it might only last so long, and when he came out, he still looked pale beneath the flush from the heat. 

“We’re still gonna go,” I told him as I shimmied the towel around his body, speeding up the process of him drying off. “I’m not trying to be like, insane or bitchy about this or whatever but–” 

Josh quickly lifted one arm to cough loudly, his whole body moving with a long shake. “I know. You’re not being anything about this, love. I’d do the same if it were you.” He sniffed, sighed. “Except I’d probably carry you there. You can’t carry me there.”

“Thank God for cars,” I said, and once Josh was dressed and we were packed up, we got in my own vehicle and headed toward the hospital.

I’d never spent much time in hospitals. Josh, however, had–from broken bones to ruptured eardrums, accidental lacerations and bad sprains, he, Jake and Sam had been inside the walls of our hometown hospital far more than I ever had. The sharp smell of ammonia and artificial lemon made me crinkle my nose as soon as we got inside, and the too-bright white lights that bounced off the white walls made me want to turn right around. Thankfully, no matter how much he resented the fact that we had to be there at all, Josh followed my every move. We checked in and sat down, him wrapped up in multiple layers of clothing beneath a hand-me-down jacket from Danny. I felt too hot in my own layers, the overwhelming heat emanating from the whole hospital mixing with my nerves and superseding the beginnings of a dreary November snowfall outside. 

My phone vibrated and a text from Jake read: Keep us posted. If he gets admitted we’re gonna head up there

I will, I texted back. We’re still in the waiting room now

“Who’s that?” Josh asked, resting his head on my shoulder.

“Your twin. Jake says they’re gonna drive up if you have to stay overnight,” I told him, still helplessly bouncing my leg, to which Josh rested one hand on my knee.

“I doubt it, darling. What could they even do for this?”

“I don’t know. I wish I was a doctor,” I said, locking my phone and tucking it away. “Then I could figure it out and fix you myself.”

“You’ll be my sexy nurse.”

I laughed. “Okay, yeah, I can do that. I was trying to be that back home. Well, I guess I wasn’t that sexy.”

Josh snickered. “Lies.”

Snow was falling harder by the time we were ushered into another room to wait further, but finally an actual doctor showed up. I sat back in the stiff chair and watched as Josh was examined, with the doctor taking longer than what I figured was normal while he checked his breathing. I could see Josh struggling to take deep breaths, and when he took the final one dictated by the doctor, he let out another harsh, dry cough. 

“Any pain?” the doctor asked, moving the stethoscope to a different spot on Josh’s back.

“A little,” Josh said. “In my chest.”

The doctor pulled the stethoscope away. “Let’s do some x-rays. Your lungs don’t sound how I want them to. Do you smoke?”

“Not often,” Josh answered, looking crestfallen. “You really need to do x-rays?”

“It’ll just be a few minutes,” the doctor assured him, then looked at me. “Would you like to wait here or come with us?”

With the worry rising, I felt as though I couldn’t even move besides the nervous fidgeting, and I got the sense the doctor wanted me to wait anyway. “I’ll stay,” I told them, looking at Josh. “I’ll text Jake again and bring him up to speed.”

And I did just that while Josh got his x-rays, feeling dread pour into my mind. X-rays were serious, right? I’d never had one. Jake tried to reassure me via text but also reaffirmed that he, Sam and Danny were still prepared to drive into town if this became an overnight visit. 

Unfortunately, it became just that. When the doctor and Josh returned and the word “pneumonia” became thrown around, I felt my heart sink. With Josh’s heart rate being too low, the high fever and the fluid in his lungs, they wanted to admit him, and although I was given further reassurance by being told that he was young and healthy and would be fine, the fact that Josh had to be stuck in the hospital at all made me feel helpless and confused. 

“This is silly,” Josh said while an actual nurse got him situated with an IV. He looked small and delicate in that hospital bed, watching her actions closely.

“We gotta make sure you’re getting your fluids,” she told him, her voice tired but kind. “And we’re getting you started on those antibiotics too, alright?”

As soon as the nurse was gone, I felt a sob getting caught in my throat. I knew Josh would be okay but there was still a part of me that was so frightened at the alternative. He sat up and looked at me, frowning with concern: “Sweetheart, what is it?” I shook my head, trying not to cry because it was pointless, but Josh was having none of that. “Come here, love.” 

So I went over to him, sitting down on the scant space of bed, and he wrapped his arm around me. “It’s hard to see you like this,” I confessed, and the tears started to come. I closed my eyes and rested my head on his shoulder, bringing one hand to my face. “I don’t know, Starshine. I know you’ll be okay.”

“In sickness and in health,” Josh said, sounding more serious than humorous. “It’s got me thinking too, about how much more of this we might have to deal with as we get older. But I am going to be fine. It’s just a bit of bad luck and a shitty immune system.”

“I know,” I said through more tears, but they were already easing up. I wiped my eyes and sighed, burrowing into him. Josh always seemed so vital, so alive, to the point I realized I sort of viewed him as almost invincible. Almost immortal, in a way. “It fucking sucks.” Some “what ifs” were still circling through my brain but I wouldn’t voice them. That was actually pointless. 

Having relayed the final news to the boys, they showed up a couple hours later. Jake stayed right next to Josh on the other side of the bed while Sam milled about the room and Danny pulled the chair up to be close. It was funny, I thought, how much more alive Josh already seemed to be thanks to the attention and affection. Probably also the rush of fluids and maybe the start of those antibiotics, too. It was suddenly almost like nothing was wrong–the boys brought us both up to speed on their writing and rehearsing, a leak in their basement and then some exciting progress on what was going on between Jake and Jane. That perked both Josh and me up, at least–something worth celebrating.

We were told by another nurse, though the words didn’t exactly match her facial expression, that we could essentially stay as long as we wanted. Josh was insistent, however, after an entire day of none of us really eating and nighttime in full swing, that we all should head home. The boy’s parents were headed over to the hospital anyway, so at least he wouldn’t be alone the entire evening. I think we were all still reluctant to leave but I made sure Josh had all of his supplies, kissed him on the forehead and then headed out, feeling strange and forlorn, to go back to our apartment.

The snow had stopped falling by the time I was on the road–another thing to be grateful for–and although I was only home in the empty apartment for a short time while the boys grabbed us all dinner, I hated how cold and sad it felt without Josh. Or really, with knowing where he was instead of being home with me. 

“Thank god,” I said when the buzzer sounded. The sight of the boys piling through the door made me feel so much better, as did not eating alone. I hadn’t realized how hungry I’d become until the food was in front of me and it appeared to be the same for them–we ate like we hadn’t done so in days. It was good to know I wasn’t alone in my worries, no matter how baseless they may have essentially been.

“He’ll be okay,” Danny told me. We were all grouped in the living room, Danny next to me on the couch, Jake next to him and Sam on the floor in front of us. 

“I know,” I said, the small phrase sounding like a mantra. “I’m still scared.” I looked to Jake for reassurance of that feeling and, silently, he gave it to me. That twin connection was eternal and stronger than I’d ever be able to understand. 

We all ended up sleeping in the living room, too. I took the couch and the boys took the floor in the sleeping bags Josh and I had smartly kept a third to hoard, and though the company was of great comfort, I still couldn’t fall asleep. I kept thinking of Josh in that stiff white hospital bed; maybe Jake was thinking of the same thing, because he and I were still rolling around while Sam and Danny were out cold. 

“I just keep thinking about death now,” I told Jake in a whisper through the dark as I made another shift onto my side, looking out onto the floor. I could see his silhouette tucked into the sleeping bag, him propping his head up in his hand. 

“That’s way more morbid than what’s happening right now,” he replied, though there was still a tinge of sympathy in his soft voice. “Josh isn’t gonna die. But yeah, it’s scary. I hear you. I’m way more used to us being sick or injured together, honestly.” 

I sighed, bringing the blanket further up my chest. “I don’t wanna grow up.”

Jake chuckled. “Me either.”

After a moment I asked, “You really think he’ll be okay?”

“Yeah, I do.” Jake shuffled a bit more and I could hear more than see that he was directly facing me. “You said it’s just been a few days, right? It’s bound to get better.”

“Yeah. The doctors know, I’m sure.” We both stayed quiet for a minute before I said, “I’ve just never seen him like that. So exhausted and weak. And when that doctor said his pulse or his heart rate or whatever was too low? I mean, that’s scary.”

“If you weren’t here, Josh would’ve never gone to the ER,” Jake said. “Who knows how much worse it would’ve gotten then. But they said he’s probably gonna come home tomorrow. We’ll stick around if you want help.”

“I don’t want you guys getting sick, too. I’m probably gonna get sick next.”

“All the more reason for us to stay and help.” Jake sighed. “I miss being super close all the time anyway.”

I smiled a little to myself. “You do?”

“Yeah, of course,” Jake said and I could hear the smile in his own words. “Sometimes I feel like I’m babysitting, dude. Josh was always sort of our leader. Yeah, it was different when we started the band and he started school but still. He was always there.”

I rolled onto my back. “Sometimes I wonder if he regrets not joining you guys. We’ve talked a lot about it and I know he’s happy where he is now but–I don’t know. I could see it, him being part of the band. But I’m glad he went to college instead. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have met him.” I stretched, feeling better, feeling myself edge a little closer to real tiredness. “My life would’ve turned out so boring without him. And all you guys.”

“You take good care of him. He needs that.”

I laughed softly. “He’s good at taking care of himself, too. And of me.” 

Jake yawned and I heard him settle back down in the sleeping back. “We’ll go back first thing in the morning. I bet he’s already dying to come home.”

---

Tagging: @jjwasneverhere @bizzielisteningtogreta @clairesjointshurt @lightsofthe-living-gvf @starbuggie @sparrowofrhiannon

If you'd like to be tagged in any of my fics, you can go here or DM me :)

[cyncerity]

NO ONE ASKED FOR THIS BUT HERE IT IS ANYWAY

Ok so Store Shifter AU this takes place after Dream is semi-comfortable growing back to human size and he’s met Karl and Q and he knows Sapnap and Tommy are shifters. Yes that is all important for context in this story.

This started with me wanting to write fluffy Disc Duo noms and it became so much longer I apologize but my love of writing dialogue cannot be held down

tw: soft, safe vore, injuries (nothing graphic but people get hurt), intrusive thoughts ig?

it’s past 2 am i just really wanted to finish this

Something was wrong. Something was very wrong.

Dream was still getting used to a few things now that he knew he was a shifter. Nothing too unbearable, it had been a little while since he had learned properly what he was and how to deal with it all, but some things were definitely harder than others. As far as he was concerned, he still grew a few inches every time someone startled him a bit. But this was…different.

It had started with the weird smells in the store. Like someone had lit a giant candle that smelled like the best thing he could imagine. Then it started to get weirder. The smell would almost shift slightly depending on where he was, maybe being sweeter or spicier or more sour. Then he noticed it only changed when he was around different people. At first he thought maybe it was a coincidence and people were just using a new deodorant or something, but why was it so weirdly strong? Why did it make him feel weird? What was wrong with him??

He made another horrifying discovery later while talking to Punz. They were just restocking in the back, talking as usual when Dream once again took note of how his friend smelled. He smelled like that unidentifiable aroma that had filled the store, mixed with some sort of vanilla or tea. It was heavenly. Dream made the horrifying discovery that he was practically drooling at the scent. Punz didn’t just smell good, no…he smelled appetizing.

It only got worse as he managed to subconsciously pinpoint a scent to every one of his friends, and he soon realized that the unidentifiable good smell was just humans in general. Every time the store opened the air would fill with the scent, and Dream started wearing a face mask just in case he ever forgot to swallow back down the drool that had built up. It was getting increasingly harder to deal with, to say the least.

He hit a breaking point during his lunch break only a few days later. He went to the staff room, heating his shitty microwave burrito and taking a bite only to spit it back out seconds later. It was absolutely disgusting, to the point where he couldn’t even stand eating it. So, he tried something else in the communal fridge. Tasted like dog shit. Another thing, same result. He was starving, why did everything taste awful? What was he going to do? Why was the only appealing thing people? No way he would ever…

He shut that thought down as quickly as it came up. No, that was stupid to think about, just…no. That could never happen, he wouldn’t go that far, ever. But, there was only one person who might know how to actually help him. He hated to bug him on his day off, but at least he knew he was still in the store.

He went over to his personal cubby and reached for the little box he had hidden taped in the top corner of the locker. He sent a quick text to Foolish that he’d be out for a bit and to run the shop while he was away before pulling his borrower clothes out of the box.

He was pretty sure he remembered where Ni- Sapnap’s base was, it shouldnt be too far.

***

“No man, I’m telling you, you gotta eat someone.”

“No! That’s…no, absolutely not! You cannot be serious, there has to be another way!!” Dream cried, hands pulling back his hair roughly as he tried to process what Sapnap was saying. He paced across the floor of the “living room,” really just the biggest room Sapnap and his fiancés had carved out (he wondered how they had even done that to begin with but this really wasn’t the time to ask) where they kept actual chairs and most of their chests and clothes. Sapnap just shrugged from where he was seated on one of the makeshift chairs, idly fiddling with the multicolored braid he wore around his own waist that Dream now knew represented his relationship with Quackity and Karl.

“What will happen if I don’t? It’ll just go away…right?” “I wish.” Sapnap responded, dejectedly dropping the braid back down to where it hung at his side. “Take it from someone who waited too long. Bad shit happens.” “What kinda bad shit?” Dream asked quietly, sitting next to Sapnap. The other shifter sighed as he continued, making a point not to make eye contact. “This was a few years ago, only a short while after I shifted for the first time. About as long as it’s been for you, actually. I started to feel…restless. I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t be around people, it was bad. But, I thought I could take it. Just, ride it out, y’know? But…I snapped. I didn’t have many people I cared about left after…” he went silent. Dream figured he hadn’t meant to add that bit, and he could only assume he was about to talk about whatever had unlocked his shifter instinct.

“…you don’t have to talk about it.” Dream muttered, placing a hand on Sapnap’s shoulder. Sapnap just sighed and patted his hand in response. “I know, it’s just…still hurts, yknow? Even after all this. My dads, they…it’s complicated. Long story short, my relationship with my dads after I became a shifter was…strained, to say the least. Didn’t help that one day after the incident my biological dad took me out for a walk to try and get closer with me again and a hawk attacked us. I…I lost control. I vaguely remember shifting, not even to a full human size, only a few feet tall, just big enough to eat him. I remember fighting my father out of that damn things claws, but I didn’t stop there. Some instinct in me didn’t think he was safe yet, so…” his breath hitched, but he took a deep breath in and out and continued on anyway.

“So, I swallowed him. I was completely out of it, just growling and hissing, I don’t even remember if that bird survived the encounter or not, I just remember coming back and feeling thrashing in my stomach, hearing my dad sobbing, begging for his life, begging me to let him live. It…I hate to be dramatic, but I think it was just as scary for me as it was for him. It hurts to hear someone you love think you’re gonna kill them. It…yeah, it sucked. I spit him out and ran. I took Quackity and Karl and never went back.” “How is your dad now? Is he doing better with…the whole shifting thing?” Sapnap just laughed sadly in response. “Fuck if I know. When I said I never went back, I meant it. The last time I ever saw him was right after I spat him out, never again since.” “That’s…that’s horrible. Do you even know where he is?” “No, but I don’t think I need to. The look of disgust on his face when he saw me shift for that first time was enough, I don’t need to see what he thinks of me now that I literally ate him alive, even if it was a while ago.”

“…I think you should try and make up with him, if you ever see him again. He’s your dad, i’m sure he’s forgiven you.” ‘I’m sure he still loves you’ goes unsaid, but Dream is sure Sapnap knew what he meant. “Your perception on what is forgivable by borrower standards may be a little skewed, since you’re a human born shifter. As far as he probably thinks, I tried to actually eat him. That’s one of the top things borrowers live in fear of; being eaten.” “Right…” he trailed off. They sat in silence for a moment before Dream decided to change the conversation to something that he really didn’t want to bring up but probably should.

“This may be a bit of an odd question, and this is really awkward, but I really don’t know who else-” “Yeah, you can eat me.” Sapnap interrupted, a smug look on his face that showed he knew exactly where that comment was going. “Just, you should know that it’s a protective instinct. Some weird fucked up mix of a predator drive and a nesting phase, but you’re gonna be most inclined to do it when people you love are in danger.” “So what are you saying?” “I’m saying that eating me will make your instincts die down a little, enough that you’ll probably at least be able to eat normal food again, but it won’t work fully. And, I love you man, but you don’t know me that well, all things considered. I’m not part of what your brain considers to be your ‘pack.’” “So what do I do?? If you’re not part of my ‘pack’ or whatever the fuck, who else can I…I don’t even wanna fucking say it, but you know what I mean. I know Karl and Quackity even less, and you’re the only borrowers I know at all! There’s literally no member of my pack as small as you…er, us, right now, I guess.” “Oh, Dream…” Sapnap just trailed off, looking worried. Dreams eyes widened. “Don’t ‘oh, Dream’ me, what are you about to say, what did I say, what’s wrong?”

“Shifting isn’t just about going back and forth between borrower and human size. You’d probably…I mean, more than likely..do what I did. Grow.” “What do you mean…?” Dream asked quietly, almost afraid to hear the answer. Sapnap stared off, trying to ignore the fear in Dream’s voice. “I mean grow. Giant. Bigger than human size. Big enough to..to swallow another human. It’s possible, i’ve done it. Not swallowed a human, I mean, just grown bigger than human size. And once you do it once, it becomes easier for that to be a default. Believe me, growing bigger by accident can be a real pain in the ass.” Sapnap finished, and Dream just slowly took it all in. Great, just fucking perfect. So he could be giant, too, not just tiny, why the fuck not? And he could possibly, maybe, accidentally just eat one of his employees or customers. Fucking fantastic. “…ok, great.” Was all he could think to respond with. What else could he say? Every fucking day he was just being reminded more and more that he could never go back to the life he had. He could never be human again, and he hated it. Sapnap seemed to sense this, and just rested a hand on Dream’s shoulder to comfort him. Dream couldn’t do much else other than lean into it.

***

Dream decided to go back to work after using his lunch break to talk to Sapnap, which in hindsight probably wasn’t the best decision. Sapnap had told told Dream that they could both take the day off tomorrow so he could guide Dream through how to…eat him (and god did it feel wrong for him to be thinking of that), since he had promised his fiancés he’d help them borrow some heavier supplies that day, and he was the strongest of the three. But Dream didn’t have much else to do other than go back to his job, so that’s what he did, despite not really wanting to be around people at the moment. He was distracted and distant as he went through his checklists, helped customers, and did other menial manager tasks.

It all really started to go wrong when he agreed to help Foolish grab something from a higher shelf in the back.

Really, he should have been paying more attention. All he had to do was hold the damn ladder steady as Foolish grabbed a heavier supply box. But his mind was somewhere else, clouded and distracted, distantly more focused on the revelation that Foolish smelled of salt water taffy and gummies than keeping the thing holding his little brother ten feet off the ground steady.

So when Foolish grabbed the crate and accidentally shifted his weight a little to far to the right when he was about halfway down the ladder, it shouldn’t have been a huge surprise that he fell, and fell hard.

Had Dream been paying more attention, maybe he could have steadied the ladder, or warned him, or maybe have even broken his fall. But as it was, Dream was fully out of it until Foolish hit the ground with a pained yelp and a thud from the crate, barely missing his shoulder. God, a few more inches and that would have crushed him.

Dream ran over to help, because shit, that was his little brother. His little brother who was groaning in pain on the floor, who was injured because of something he could have prevented, whose breathing was evening out as his consciousness faded, who was lying injured on the ground and he didn’t even know how bad the injury was and-

Dream felt something wrong. Physically wrong, not just in his head this time. Something in his gut tightened, constricting within him, sight blurring and mind unable to penetrate through the agony-filled haze. He dropped to the ground, unable to keep himself upright, desperately clutching at his middle in a feeble attempt to ease the pain, pain worse than almost anything he’d ever felt. He couldn’t even yell, everything in him was taught, tightened as far as it could be, all he could do was make pathetic squeaks with the noises he forced out of his closed up vocal chords in place of screams as he sobbed quietly on the ground. He wasn’t sure how long he laid there, clutching his gut as tears dripped down his face onto the floor, but it couldn’t have been long before something spoke out in his head, without tone or a voice, just an all encompassing urge.

‘Store him’

Dream squeezed his eyes shut, avoiding looking at his brother now lying limp on the floor. ‘Store him.’ He clutched at his head, yanking his hair, trying to give himself anything else to think about. ‘He’s hurt. He can’t get hurt if he’s in you.’ His breathing became more sporadic as something akin to a migraine started, and his clothes felt just a bit tighter. ‘You hurt him. Help him. Store him. You want to.’ Dream cracked an eye open only to come to the horrifying realization that he was bigger than he’d been a few seconds ago. ‘I want to.’ Dream tried to ignore the all encompassing emptiness he felt within him. ‘I don’t want him to hurt. I’ll help him. He’ll be safe within me. I love him.’ Dream hated that the instinct in his mind had shifted it’s point of view. He didn’t want these thoughts. They weren’t his. He didn’t want them to be his.

The thing that snapped him out of his thoughts was the circulation in his limbs starting to be cut off. He belatedly realized that he was now much bigger than he had meant to be, not that he had meant to be big at all. He didn’t know exactly how tall he was, but Foolish looked…he looked small. Not just because of the size difference. Foolish had always been so much larger than life, ever since they were kids. Seeing him limp just felt…wrong. What he belatedly realized was that Foolish was about as tall as the length from his palm to his elbow. Still fairly tall, definitely not the size difference between a borrower and a human, but still fairly small. He remembered what Sapnap had said about the last time he’d seen his father; that he hadn’t grown to human size in order to eat him, only just big enough to swallow him down. Dream looked at himself in comparison to his brother and thought he now knew what Sapnap had meant. Like a snake and a rat, or some other larger rodent; they never looked like they could get something that big down, but somehow they managed it. Dream was horrified to realize that if he truly wanted to, right at that moment, he probably could. It wouldn’t be comfortable, and there was even a chance he would choke and pass out from lack of oxygen before he got him down, but with enough determination, he definitely, terrifyingly, could.

His body seemed to belatedly realize that his limbs were starting to turn purple from the constriction of his clothes, and now that the instict not-voices had died down a bit from the initial shock of seeing Foolish hurt, he began to shrink back down, thank god his clothes were actual an good, durable material. And thank god again that no one had walked in during all that. And while he was thinking that, thank god a third time that he was the only one with a key to the security room. It would be an absolute train wreck if anyone but him saw…whatever had just gone down here.

In the end, Dream just ended up sending an emergency notification to Punz, telling him to get to the back rooms immediately, and just left. As much as it hurt him to leave his injured brother, the instinct was still there, as it had been for days, and the pain in his gut had dulled down to a more muted but still definitely noticeable pain. He didn’t want to risk what could happen if he stayed, even if the worst seemed over with. He didn’t want to risk Foolish learning what a monster he was. He’d be better at home, alone.

***

Suffice to say, Dream wasn’t all that happy when his front door opened after he’d only been there for about twenty minutes. Maybe Foolish had stopped by? Or Punz? But did they even know he’d gone home? Maybe Sapnap…wait did Sapnap know his address? Did he even know how to use a computer well enough to look it up in the system? Maybe he’d-

All of Dream’s thoughts were cut off as he smelled something entirely new, but familiar all the same. Something sweet, but slightly sour and bitter, like strawberries that weren’t quite red and ripe. That and, oh yeah, the entirely unfamiliar scent of burned and melted flesh and peanut oil, weirdly enough.

Dream’s gut twisted painfully again as he practically tripped down the stairs from his bedroom to the living room to see Tommy standing there, dropping his bag by the door like he always did, except this time there was a noticeable section of his forearm wrapped in bandaging, but his son just stared at him with confusion. “Shouldn’t you be at wo-“ “What the hell happened to your arm?!” Dream interrupted as he ran to close the distance between them, grabbing Tommy’s arm to see what had happened, only to let go a second later when heard his son hiss in pain. “Sorry, sorry, I just…” Dream’s words trailed off as the pain in his stomach became worse and the urges started to ring out again, although softer then last time. ‘He’s hurt, I let him get hurt, I can put him somewhere he can’t get hurt again.’ And oh great, it started in the first person this time. At least they were easier to ignore. Tommy, entirely unaware of Dream’s internal conflict, just sighed. “I’m fine, big D. Had an accident with the fryer, that’s all. Just dropped the fry cage a bit too fast and some of the oil splashed on my arm. It’s not a huge deal, didn’t really bleed, barely hurts at all anymore after Wil had me pop like four Advils. It’ll probably be one hell of a nasty scar, though.” ‘I wasn’t there for him when he was hurt. I will put him somewhere where he can’t get hurt again.’ The instinct rang out, a bit louder this time, loud enough for Dream to notice the worrying shift in wording. It was minor, but he didn’t like how it had already changed from ‘I can’ to ‘I will.’ Tommy, apparently mistaking Dream’s lack of response for a prompt to continue explaining, went on. “I didn’t even think I needed to come home, really. Just, y’know, restaurant policy, I can’t exactly work with food while I have an actively…well not really bleeding, but something is certainly leaking from it. Looks gnarly as fuck, though, you should’ve seen it, big man. Anyway, the store can’t really take another hit from the health department, so here I am. Probably for the best so it doesn’t get infected, anyway. I just didn’t expect y-…um, Dream..?” Tommy cut himself off. Dream, who was only half paying attention, snapped his head back to Tommy. Or, at least, where Tommy should be. Where had he gone? And why were his clothes so tight agai- oh god damnit.

Dream looked down to see Tommy, just staring at him with a confused expression. In Dream’s panic he actually managed to shift back down on his own free will, which he’d pat himself on the back for later, but for the moment, he was a bit concerned about what Tommy had just seen. “Uh..I- uh…” “Are you ok?” Dream kind of froze at that. “What?” “Are you ok?” Tommy asked again, more firmly this time. “You’ve never accidentally shifted big before, and you’ve been kinda hunched over and pale, not to mention you smell like you’re in pain.” Now it was Dream’s turn to be confused. “..Smell...?” “It’s like…hmm…like you’re regular scent, but more…less good, that make sense? Like, not as…appetizing? Would that be a good word to use?” Dream kinda just stared, only moving to blink. “How can you even-“ “Don’t tell me you forgot I was a shifter.” And, oh, right, of course Tommy would know about all of that, he was a shifter. Dream didn’t know how he forgot that, other than he’d just assumed Tommy was human for so long that it was still weird to think he was anything else. “Right, duh. Sorry.” Dream asked, facepalming at his own stupidity. He’d chalk that one up to his instincts fucking with his brain for days on end.

“You’re also drooling a lot, y’know.” Tommy pointed out unhelpfully, making Dream’s eyes snap open as he became once again painfully aware of the emptiness in his stomach, and how much his instincts would love for the kid in front of him to fill that void. The still potent smell of his injury didn’t help quell his instincts much, either. “S-sorry, sorry, I really don’t know what’s wrong with me.” Dream lied, wiping the excess spit from his lips. “I just started to feel a bit sick, kind of an upset stomach, so I came home early.” Tommy didn’t look like he quite believed him, but he just shrugged. “Whatever you say. Though…are you sure that’s all it is? Definitely nothing else?” “Yes, I’m sure.” Dream said firmly, because what else could he say? ‘No, actually, I’m very not ok cause I almost ate Foolish earlier and now I want to eat you?’ Yeah, right, not gonna happen. Even though Dream’s stomach seemed to disagree as it made a louder-than-he-would-have-preferred gurgling sound that he quickly tried to dampen with his hand and a fake coughing fit. Tommy just kind of inspected him for a little while longer before sighing and seemingly giving up.

“…Alright then, man, I hope you feel better soon. You should probably go take a nap or something, you seem like you need it. Not to be rude, but you look like absolute shit right now.” Dream scoffed. “Yeah, I’m sure I do. A nap doesn’t sound too bad. Just, make sure to replace your bandage, its starting to get yellow. There’s a medkit and disinfectant under the bathroom counter.” Dream turned to go back up the stairs as he heard Tommy swear behind him, mostly likely cursing out the fact that he already had to change bandages and re-clean his wound. But, he’d be fine to do it by himself. The last thing Dream wanted was for his urges to become too strong and to scare his kid. So, he retired to his bedroom for the night, quickly changing into pjs and doing his best to ignore the hungry sounds coming from his gut, adamantly refusing to give in to what it wanted. Just a few more hours. A few more hours and then Sapnap could show him how to fix this.

***

Dream woke up to a weird weight on his face and some thing poking at his eye, which was honestly probably one of the worse ways to wake up. His first thought was that a rat had somehow gotten in his house as he yelled and jolted up, suddenly far more awake than he’d been seconds ago, although his mind was still clouded with sleep. The thing on his face yelled out as it practically used his face as a springboard to grab onto his hair, now that the surface it had been sitting on had gone vertical. He yelled out again as he desperately tried to grab the thing from his head, only to hear more yelling in response, and, probably more importantly, words. He let himself freeze for a moment so he could actually hear what was being said, and he finally registered his own name. “Dream! Dream!! It’s just me! Jesus fuck, calm down, let me down! It’s me!!” Dream reached over to his bedside and clicked a lamp, going cross eyed as he tried to look at the figure dangling less than an inch from his face.

“Tommy? What the fuck are you doing??” “Can you understand me?” “Huh??” “Can. You. Understand. Me.” “Uh…yeah??” “Then let me the fuck down!!” He cried, still dangling helplessly by Dream’s hair. He wasted no time in bringing his hands up under his now shrunken son, who let go of his hair almost instantly and fell into his waiting hands. “Thank fuck. I didn’t know how long it’d been since you shrunk, I was honestly just hoping for the best. It’d probably have scared you a lot more if I’d woken you up and you’d only heard squeaking.” Tommy laughed, though Dream’s brain substituted something much more sinister and worrying. ‘I could have hurt him. If I didn’t know it was him, what would I have done? I need to keep him safe.’ His stomach tightened up even worse, and he muffled the pained noise he was tempted to make. Shit, why was he in here? And why was he small?? Of all the times for him to decide to shrink and go in his room, this was definitely one of, if not the worst. And as if to prove his point, his stomach made a louder noise than earlier, but Dream chose to ignore it in favor of turning his attention back to Tommy. “What are you doing in here this late? And why are you small?? You…you really shouldn’t be in here right now.” He moved to set Tommy down on the floor next to his bed, where he couldn’t reach him, but Tommy jumped off his hands and into his lap instead. ‘It’d be so easy,’ his instincts rang even louder, ‘I wouldn’t have any trouble getting him down. Keeping him safe.’ Dream pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes. He couldn’t be thinking like this. Not with Tommy here. “I’m not leaving.” Tommy said with a resolve Dream couldn’t even imagine coming out of Tommy’s mouth. “I’m not leaving until you feel better.” Dream dropped his hands to look Tommy in the eye. “Tom, you don’t understand. You don’t know what’s going on, you have no idea what I want to do to y-“ “Let me rephrase that.” Tommy interrupted. “I’m not leaving until you eat me.”

“…What?”

“You heard me, bitch. Either you eat me or I sit here all night making your instincts worse until you snap.” He said, matter-of-factly. “But how do you…?” “Do I have to remind you again? I’m a shifter! We’re both shifters!! We both have the same shit to deal with! Only difference is I’ve been a shifter longer, so I’ve already gone through this. Which is also how I know that you really wanna eat me right now and that instincts get worse at night.” Dream was about to argue until his stomach rumbled again, and Tommy looked down to his midsection then back to look him in the eye with an expression that Dream knew meant he wasn’t gonna convince Tommy of any lie. ‘He’s been through this, and I wasn’t there to help him. He went through this pain and I did nothing. I can help him now. Store him.’ “I..I don’t want to, I can’t…” “Bullshit. It’s clear as fuckin’ day you do so just do it.” Tommy’s voice was harsh until his next sentence. “Dream, you’re hurting yourself, why won’t you let me help you?” ‘He wants it. Store him. He wants me to, and I love him. Store him.’ “Because..because…” ‘Store him. Keep him safe. Keep him safe inside yourself. I can keep him safe inside me.’ Dream put his hands back over his face, partly because he didn’t want to look at Tommy at the moment, and partly because he kinda felt like he was gonna cry and Tommy didn’t need to see that. What was there to say? What could he possibly say to make any of this feel better? He felt like a monster. What kind of fucked up person would want to eat their family? Their brother? Their son? He knew he wanted to but he couldn’t rationalize that he did. He couldn’t accept it. So how in God’s name was he supposed to explain that to Tommy?

“…would it make you feel better to know that I ate someone too? That other shifters go through this?” Tommy asked. Dream just laughed wetly in response. “Sapnap told me. He explained all of this earlier. I don’t think your story could be as bad as his was, but you can still tell it.” “Oh, mine wasn’t bad at all, actually. Tubbo agreed to it.” “What the fuck is a Tubbo?” “Oh, you don’t know him? I’ll have to introduce you two later…” Tommy finished, seemingly unsure of what else to say. “Would…would it make you feel better to know..I’ve been…eaten before?” Dream dropped his hands slowly, tears visibly staining his cheeks, but that wasn’t his main concern at the moment. “Y..You have…?” “Yeah. Practically daily, if I’m being honest. That’s how I knew it was safe for me to eat people when this shit happened to me. Cause I’d been eaten before.” Dream just looked at him for a minute in shock. His son had been…eaten before. Without him knowing. That was…certainly something, wasn’t it? ‘He’s been getting eaten yet I won’t eat him. I’ve been trusting strangers to keep him safe. It should be my turn. It’s my turn. Store him.’ Dream sniffed and wiped one of his eyes as Tommy anxiously waited for a response. His hair was pulled back for once to reveal his pointed ears that Dream rarely got to see, since Tommy constantly kept them hidden to prove he was human, like Sapnap did. He didn’t like how downturned they were. Did Tommy think he was mad? Or was that just a reasonably private thing to expose? Oh, it was probably mostly the latter, wasn’t it?

Instead of giving a responsible or normal response, Dream decided now was the perfect time to ask a probably not very important question, partially to make Tommy feel less embarrassed and partially just cause he wanted to ask and knew there were probably very few other appropriate times to do so. “…It’s not Wilbur, is it..?” Tommy’s ears immediately perked back up as he looked at Dream with a mockingly offended face. “Fuck no!” He shouted, making an exaggerated gagging noise to prove a point, making Dream laugh. “I think I’d die of second hand smoke just by being in his mouth! Its fucking gross! Man’s doesn’t need to know how much technical cannibalism goes down at his store. No, its the tall fucker, you’ve met him, he’s got hetero..hetero…I don’t fucking remember.” Tommy finished and oh, Dream couldn’t just not take that bait, it’d be sinful. He barely kept himself from laughing as he asked “…you know a hetero?” “Oh FUCK OFF!! I meant the weird eye thing, we both know he’s gay as hell!” Tommy yelled back up, though he was also smiling, and Dream couldn’t help but laugh out loud, wheezing a bit as he tried to maintain his composure. But, he did notice his tears had dried up.

“You feeling better, big man?” Tommy asked, and Dream smiled a bit more and nodded. “Then do you think we can get on with this? I’m tired, I wanna place to sleep and you’re closest.” Dream looked back down, debating for a moment before setting his hands down beside Tommy, the smaller shifter immediately taking the chance to climb on.

Dream lifted him just below eye level, Tommy sitting down to get comfortable, seemingly understanding that there was still more Dream wanted to ask. But Dream couldn’t exactly say what. So, Tommy filled in. “You want to know what I enjoy about being stored?” He asked, and Dream in that moment found he liked the term ‘stored’ far more than he liked ‘eaten’ or ‘swallowed.’ He nodded. Tommy looked down and began to wring his hands as he spoke. “Well, it’s warm, for one. It’s, like, this all encompassing warmth, cause, y’know, people are warm. But its not overbearingly hot. It’s also dark, which is to be expected, no big surprise there. I do have partial night vision, though, fun fact, so I can still see a little bit. It’s also fairly quiet, save for the noises of organs. I can clearly hear breathing and a heartbeat from in there, and, I’m not gonna lie, and you’d better never bring this up again or so help me god I will clart you, but its…its relaxing. There’s a strong, steady, unceasing rhythm, and it’s calming, in a weird sort of way. I’m in there and every just…goes on around me, like I’m not even there. It’s this weird tranquil sort of peace.” Tommy looked up at Dream, who was just looking. Not with disgust, or confusion, or judgement in any sort, but like he was trying to understand more. Tommy appreciated that. So, he went on. “I’d say the best part is…and, again, the clart thing applies here, too, but…I don’t know, its just feels…nice. It feels nice in there.” He finally settled on, face starting to heat up from embarrassment.

Like hell was he could stop there, though, something was finally getting through to his dumbass of a guardian. This was for Dream (well, mostly Dream, but himself partially since some of his pack instincts were mad that Dream was refusing to take care of himself). “It’s like…spongy and squishy and…I’m not even sure how to describe it…its kinda smooth, but its flexible most of the time..whatever, it doesn’t matter. It’s just nice. It sometimes makes noise, not that I’ve ever minded. The noises make the walls vibrate weird, which is cool. It’s almost always, like…moving. Swaying, or something. It’s weird, cause I know that the room I’m in is alive and its…” Tommy looked back up at Dream, who was still looking back at him. He continued. “Well, lets just speak hypothetically here, it’d be…you. Fully, entirely surrounded by you. And…I don’t know about you, but…but that’s a nice thought to me. I’m safe, in there. Protected, fully unavailable to the outside world. Any move you make, I feel. Every breath, every heartbeat, I hear. Only you can hear me, and I can hear practically nothing but you. It’s…I don’t know, it’s something not many people get to do. Not that normal people want to, but, hey, maybe they would if they could, who knows. But, we can. And more so, I trust you enough to do this. I’m completely at your will in there. For that time, I’m entirely yours, but I know with my whole soul that you’d never take advantage of that. Because you love me as much as I love you. And believe me, I…I love you a lot, Dad.” He finished, never breaking eye contact. He could see tears start to well in Dreams eyes, even if his face remained mostly neutral. Then he smiled, shifting Tommy to one hand as he used the other to wipe his eyes. “…ok,” he finally spoke up softly, and Tommy’s ears perked up as he waited for what he hoped Dream was going to say. “What do I need to do.”

Tommy grinned ear to ear, his ears perked up fully now. “Practically nothing, just get me to your mouth and I’ll take it from there.” Dream took a moment to process it before breathing in and out slowly, and lifting Tommy to his lips, barely opening his mouth. If this were Ranboo, Tommy would probably yell at him for not helping enough. Hell, if this were Dream doing anything else, he’d yell at him. But, he knew that this was probably difficult and very, very uncomfortable for Dream, so he decided to not be rude for once. Instead, he just pushed down on Dream’s bottom teeth, which gave way with very little pressure, and climbed inside about half way.

Dream froze. Oh god his son was in his mouth, that was so weird, fuck, this felt- His own thoughts were cut off when his stomach cramped again, worse than before, worse than it had since he’d gotten back home, but not quite as bad as with Foolish. He sucked in air through teeth gritted lightly against Tommy’s midsection, vaguely even registering that he had partially closed his mouth, as his instincts rang louder than ever before. ‘This is right. This is right. Swallow him. Store him. Keep him safe.’ “Ok, big man,” Tommy called out, voice slightly muffled from behind his cheeks, and Dream feeling the weird sensation of vibration from his voice on his tongue and hard palate. “This is gonna sound weird but I’m too dry to get down your throat like this. Hurts like a bitch if I’m not damp enough, trust me. I need you to get me, like, covered in spit.” Dream made a vague noise of confusion in response, so Tommy clarified. “I’m asking you to lick me, bitch.” Dream took a few more deep breaths as he Tommy pulled himself in fully, though he had to curl himself up a bit to fit the whole way, and Dream began to move him around his mouth, slowly and carefully so he didn’t accidentally shove him against his teeth or do something that could hurt him. Tommy, for the most part was doing his best to keep still, thankfully. Dream was already feeling weird about having someone in there, he couldn’t imagine how much worse this would get if he was moving, too.

Eventually, Tommy’s taste started to register, too, and he was admittedly shocked at how good he tasted. It was just like how he smelled; strawberries, but slightly bitter and sour, which Dream now assumed was from the pain of his injury. He remembered Tommy saying he could tell Dream was in pain from his scent, but in the moment that hadn’t fully registered in his head. Huh. He’d have to ask Tommy what he smelled like later. Thankfully, though, he didn’t taste any peanut oil or other obvious signs of the injury, so Tommy must have re-wrapped it well. Still, though, something in him screamed to just drag him down already, to make his poor injured child feel better, but he wouldn’t without the green light from Tommy. After a few more moments, he felt more than heard Tommy laugh. “I must taste pretty damn good, you’re drooling again, it’s practically flooded in here.” Dream realized he was right, and that ok, maybe there was more spit than necessary, and maybe some of it was leaking out of his mouth a bit, but that was not one of his concerns at the moment. Dream responded by shoving at Tommy lightly, pressing him into his cheek, and he could feel Tommy lightly kick out at his cheek in response, and Dream was sure that it had made some sort of visible indent in the moment. “Ok, I’m ready. You can swallow. I’ll go down headfirst, that’s easier on you. And tilt your head back. I don’t think you’ve ever swallowed anything as big as me, so you’ll definitely want gravity on your side here. Also, put your hands on your throat, one right above your clavicle and one right under your chin.” Dream made another noise of confusion. “Just trust me, do it. And swallow when you’re ready, it’s boring in here and I wanna sleep.” Dream rolled his eyes, but tilted his head back as he felt Tommy situate himself correctly. He took a few more deep breaths in and out through his nose, and, finally, swallowed.

Dreams eyes widened and it took all of his willpower not to gag as he felt what he could only presume to be Tommy’s head enter his throat. He felt his neck bulge out underneath his hand as Tommy slipped down painfully slow, and his stomach gave another painful growl. It was a tight fit, to say the least, tight enough that he could feel Tommy’s chest rising and falling clear as day in his throat, a calm rhythm that directly contradicted the near hyperventilating he was doing. Tommy’s head was almost at his other hand by the time his feet even entered the throat, and at this point Dream was almost glad he had been drooling earlier, since just swallowing over and over seemed to get him down faster, and the spit was helping. He felt the first of Tommy drop below his collarbones into his chest, and made the horrible discovery that he couldn’t breathe. He frantically swallowed him down even faster, just trying to get him out of the way as soon as possible, and he soon felt the rest of him slip into his chest as well. The second Tommy was away from his windpipe he was gasping for air, clutching at his chest where he could feel the uncomfortable weight that was Tommy moving slowly deeper into him. He placed a hand on his stomach, bracing himself for whatever it would feel like when Tommy did manage to end up there, and trailed his other finger down slowly to give himself a rough idea of where Tommy was, not that he couldn’t feel him, but the visual tracking helped a bit.Dream braced himself when his two hands met, the one tracking Tommy just above his stomach, and he tensed as he felt Tommy slip into the chamber, his stomach actually distending a bit to fit him and growing under Dream’s palm.

And all at once, he felt miraculously better.

He wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but he certainly didn’t think it would be this instantaneous. But his instincts were no longer screaming at him, instead filing him with a bone-deep relief that this was finally right, and this was where Tommy was meant to be. His stomach stopped hurting, the cramps gone now that the feeling of emptiness was replaced with heavy, living weight in the form of his son, whose natural body heat seeped into the walls around him, warming Dream from the inside. It reminded him of eating soup, except the soup was solid and alive and he could feel it’s heartbeat if he was still enough, and Tommy would never get cold. It felt…good. He hated to say it, and he’d think about the implications of it later, but it actually felt really good. He felt Tommy move from within him and, oh fuck, that was a weird feeling, but not an entirely unpleasant one. He still couldn’t help that his breath hitched and he tensed in surprise, effectively squishing Tommy between his stomach walls, which made his stomach make a whole new round of weird noises, but he felt and heard Tommy laugh it off.

“So,” Tommy said, the smug tone clear even through the walls of flesh and muscle surrounding him, “was it really that bad?” “The swallowing was, yes.” Dream replied, shuddering at the idea that he’d have to do that backwards to get Tommy out. “Yeah, sorry, big man, kinda forgot to mention that you wouldn’t be able to breathe for a while while doing that.” “Oh yeah, cause that’s not something I needed to know at all.” He responded sarcastically, finally letting his stomach muscles loosen around Tommy as he began to relax. “The rest of it…ok, you win, it wasn’t that bad.” He relented, hearing Tommy start to celebrate in him. “I told you, I told you!! Now you’re as weird as I am bitch! Get used to this, I want cuddles more often now.” He huffed, clearly proud of himself. Dream scoffed fondly, placing a hand over the slightly moving bump on his belly. “Of course, how could I deny you cuddles, that would just be evil of me, wouldn’t it.” “Yeah it fuckin’ would.” Tommy agreed, laughing lightly.

Dream began to relax further, trying to fall asleep, hand still over where he felt his son, but found that it wasn’t just Tommy moving around slightly. It was his entire stomach. He placed both hands over it and felt clear as day that it was contracting and moving without him telling it to, the gurgling less loud, but more constant than it had been. Tommy, however, didn’t seem to mind, just content to be moved wherever the muscles around him pushed him. “…Tommy? Is everything alright in there?” He asked nervously. “I’m fine.” Tommy responsed almost immediately, picking up on his guardian’s distressed tone. “Everything’s perfectly fine, your body just isn’t used to having things that aren’t food in your stomach, so it’s doing what it would be doing to help food digest faster.” “Oh my god, are y-“ “I’ll be fine, this happens every time, relax. Everything will chill out once your gut realizes I’m staying right where I’m at.”

Dream sighed in relief, as weird as that all sounded, at least Tommy was ok. He was safe, where no one but Dream could get him. And god, did that feel good. He had known Tommy before the…incident, back when the kid was just his little cousin and not his son. Before what probably unlocked his shifter traits had happened. It had taken a long while for Dream to see that sunny, optimistic little boy he’d come to love again after that. It had taken years for Tommy to open up again, even if he he wasn’t as open, and probably never would be again. That didn’t matter. He loved him anyway. Dream loved Tommy, he loved him so, so fucking much. He’d told Tommy he’d always be there for him when he adopted him, that he’d keep him safe, and he intended to keep that promise for as long as he was still breathing.

“Goodnight Tommy.” Dream said softly, laying back down and gently rubbing his stomach, which only resulted in more gurgling sounds. What Dream wasn’t expecting was the feeling of tiny hands against his stomach, rubbing along the inside of his stomach, massaging in places he never would have thought would feel good. Yet, here he was. He flopped backwards the rest of the way, hearing Tommy squeak in surprise as they both started to laugh. “I love you, sunshine.” Normally, Tommy hated when Dream pulled out that old nickname, but he didn’t seem to mind it tonight. “I love you , too, Dad.”

Bonus (as if this wasn’t long enough jfc)

Dream had somehow gotten to work late. Foolish had practically shaken him awake like a half hour before they both needed to be there, and they probably would have made it in the building on time if Dream hadn’t spent the entire car ride apologizing for letting Foolish fall five feet off a ladder the day before and get minimally concussed and bruised, with Foolish constantly interjecting that it was his own fault for his shitty balance, and it quickly turned into a lighthearted argument. Dream didn’t mark it up on either of their records, he thought arguing about the ladder incident was a good enough reason to be late. After all, he was the boss, what was he gonna do, fire himself? Foolish asked him if he wanted to grab a snack from the break room for breakfast, since they had forgotten to eat in their rush out the door. Dream went with him, but ended up declining.

“How come?” Foolish asked, mouthful of a granola bar. “Did you eat yet today?” “Nah, just not hungry, I don’t know why.” “Huh. Did you eat a big dinner?” “Uhhh…” Actually, Dream couldn’t recall eating at all the day before, and possibly even the day before that, but he didn’t exactly need to share that. “…I don’t think so, but I can’t quite remember.” “Odd.” Foolish said, turning to throw away the wrapper to his granola bar as Dream subtly lifted his shirt to see that he at least definitely at least looked full, way more full than normal. But how could he not remember eating that mu- “Oh, by the way,” Foolish said, turning his attention back to Dream. “Did you see Tommy this morning?” Dream’s eyes widened. Ooooohhhh right. Shit. Yeah, that would be why he wasn’t hungry. “Uh, he, uh…he..he’s at a friends place. Yeah, left last night to head to a sleepover. Hence why you didn’t see him this morning. He wasn’t there. He was at the sleepover. At someone else’s house that wasn’t ours.” Dream realized he should have stopped talking a while before that point, but he wasn’t exactly the best liar. He smiled genuinely as best he could, but the odd look on Foolish’s face showed that he was probably more likely grimacing. “…ok then. I’m gonna go check…something. Join me when you stop being weird.” He clapped Dream on the shoulder as he walked past him and out of the break room.

Dream waited a couple seconds after the door shut before he ran to lock it and immediately fell back onto the beanbag chair they kept in there, surprisingly not waking up Tommy, who he could now register was actually fucking snoring still. Seriously, how did he forget he was in there? “Well, it seems my help is no longer needed.” Dream heard a familiar voice come from above him, looking up to see Sapnap sitting at a vent near the ceiling, legs and tail dangling off the edge. “How could you tell?” Dream sighed. “Besides the world’s most conspicuous coverup story? I watched the cams from yesterday, you were definitely worse than I thought. I figured you’d have snapped and eaten someone by morning. Just surprised it wasn’t Foolish.” “I’ll have you know that I did not snap, I- wait how were you watching the cams??” “There are vents in there too, y’know.” Sapnap shrugged. “Karl, Q, and I watched them when we’re bored. It’s like our own personal bad reality sitcom.” “Ok, I’m gonna ignore that you just said that.” Dream mumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose before looking back at Sapnap. “My son helped me out.” “Oh right! I forgot he was a shifter.” “Yeah, I did to, and I also forgot he was in here, I guess, so now he’s stuck here until I have time to get him out.” “Good luck with that, having time to get him out and knowing how to are two very different things.” Sapnap said, standing back up. “Wait, Sap, what does that mean?” But the shifter just laughed as he waved and walked off. “See you when my shift starts!”

“…Great.” Dream said, barely audibly. He just sat rubbing circles into his stomach before he felt something stir and released the pressure. He heard Tommy yawn and felt his hands press against his stomach as he stretched his arms, making almost imperceptible indents in the skin around him. Dream decided that whatever he felt when seeing that could be pushed back and dealt with later. “Good morning sleepyhead.” Dream cooed as Tommy mumbled something incoherent, probably cursing. “…what time is it?” He eventually asked, sleep still clinging to his tone. “A little before 8, so I’m already at work.” “Let me guess, you forgot I was in here so you went to work and you’re just now realizing that you don’t know how to spit me out?” “What? No!……yes.” Tommy sighed obnoxiously loud as he readjusted himself. “Y’know I should’ve expected that. I’m too much like you sometimes, your dumbass-ery rubs off on me.” “…context?” “This is exactly what I did when I stored someone for the first time.” He responded shamefully, making Dream wheeze. “Oh, I wouldn’t be laughing to hard yet, big man, I have a secret weapon you don’t know about.” “Oh yeah, pipsqueak? What’s that?” He heard Tommy laugh quietly to himself as he moved to a part of the stomach he hadn’t been in yet, and gently stroked a higher area. Dream froze, taking in the sensation again. “So what do you think that’ll-“ He cut himself off as something started to feel off in his throat. He pressed his hands to his neck as the sensation grew, and became strangely audible. He heard Tommy laugh louder as a horrified look grew on his face. “What’s wrong, Dream?” Tommy laughed. “Didn’t you know you could purr?” Dream just stood frozen for a second. “…What the ACTUAL FUCK-“

[alittlebitofeverythingtbh]

Taking Care of You: Corey HC’s

Authors note: @ethanhoewke had a request for Corey taking care of his partner while on their period, and I am here to deliver.

- Corey is not at all embarrassed to go get you pads or tampons. You will have to be exact with which ones you want though. One time you forgot to mention what brand you needed and he stood in the aisle for ten minutes before calling you to ask.

- He does not know what a heating pad is. You will have to tell him about it. Once he does though, he’s always grabbing it for you the moment you complain about cramps.

- Corey cuddles you more than usual, which is saying something. You basically will never leave his arms and if you do he is pouting.

- Corey will get you anything you need. Need some Advil? He’s leaping off the couch to get it for you. Need a snack? He’s pulling out a pack of those frosted mini donuts from his coat pocket. He is fully prepared with snacks.

- It takes him a bit to understand if you’re someone who deals with big mood swings. One time you snapped at him and he almost cried. You apologized immediately and explained your mood swings. He tries to not let it get to him, so please don’t snap at him 😭

- Some people (it’s me, hi, I’m the people it’s me) sometimes don’t feel like eating while on their period. Corey notices and is very concerned until you explain how your period makes your appetite go away. Nonetheless he is insisting you eat at least two meals a day and a snack.

- Will buy you more gifts because you don’t feel good. Expect him to come home with various Squishmallows he picked up on his travels to get you snacks and pads.

- Corey will bundle you up in a massive pile of blankets and tell you to rest. Or he will literally wrap you in a burrito blanket and set you down on the couch.

- He will try to cook. Emphasis on try. He ends up burning it because it got too complicated and you have to take over. Then he gets sad because you don’t feel good and he wanted to be the one to cook for you.

- Corey is just very doting and will make sure to do anything to make you feel better. You deserve it.

[kybelestorm]

Dynamic - Part 2

Saturdays are our lazy days. Even when there are chores to be done, it’s nice to take things slowly without any pressure. I wake up around 8 as the sunlight sneaks in through the crack in the curtains. My Dear is already awake, as always, and quietly goofing around on his phone. I snuggle closer for warmth and rub His tummy to let Him know I’m awake.

“Wanna order breakfast?”

It’s a silly luxury to get breakfast delivered, but once in a while we need to treat ourselves. I stagger out of bed long enough to grab my phone and curl back up next to Him as I pick out coffee, doughnuts and breakfast sammies. He kisses my head and rubs my back as we wait for our delivery.

The rest of the morning passes leisurely. We watch the new episode of Drag Race with breakfast, and take turns playing video games. I do a quick load of dishes while He plays Spider-Man. The kitchen is my quiet place, and as I rinse soap from the plates I replay the events from the night before. I’m still wet and beyond horny from the blowjob, and wondering exactly what time “afternoon” starts. Is 12:01 pm too literal?

I finish up the morning dishes and decide to get a shower. I want to be squeaky clean for later, so I pamper myself by taking my time under the hot water. When I emerge, skin pink and steaming, my legs are freshly shaved and smooth and I feel just a little sexier. I throw on some cute panties and a D&D t-shirt, and decide to spice things up with a pair of thigh high striped socks. (Who needs pants on the weekend?) I pause, biting my lower lip, then reach over to open the small black box next to the bed. I fish out my wrist and ankle cuffs, the pale pink ones with the soft fur lining. My heart hammering against my ribs and hands shaking slightly, I put them on, making sure that they are tight but comfortable. I take a deep breath and head back out to the living room.

“I think we’re actually going to get Carnage in this game,” He says by way of greeting. “I’m in a good spot to save if you want to play for a bit.”

“Sure.”

His eyes flick over, land on my ankles and travel up my legs slowly. “W-what’s going on?”

“Oh, you know.” I smile as his gaze meets mine. “Just giving you some ideas for later.”

“Hmm, okay.”

I have to admit it’s hard to concentrate on my game, and I die more than once thanks to my distraction. It certainly doesn’t help when He starts rubbing my leg through my sock. By the time I get up to make lunch, I barely know where I am anymore. My panties are wet from the anticipation, my cheeks feel flushed and hot. I’m not sure I even taste the burritos. When we’re done eating, I want to beg for Him to drag me into the bedroom, to ravish me in whatever way He desires. Instead, I try to exercise some self control and flop down on the sofa to watch a movie. I half-heartedly pick out some weird Italian crime thriller.

“Before that gets started, I need you to come here.” His voice is a bit lower than usual.

“What’s up?” I slide off the couch and crawl over to Him on the floor.

He pulls me in for a kiss, His tongue pushing past my lips. My hand reaches up to cup His cheek as I lean in, catching His bottom lip between my teeth. When I pull away, our eyes lock and I feel like I’m falling.

“Now, do you want to watch a movie or do you want some sexy time?” His voice is taunting me. “Your choice.”

“I…” The hesitation is because I could stay here, wrapped in His arms, kissing Him forever.

“Or I could keep teasing you all day… But you better decide quick.”

“Ugh,” I groan and steal another kiss. “But both options sound so good.”

He feigns a shrug. “Like I said, your choice. Tell me what you want.”

My whole body is pulsing with my heartbeat, my head is swimming. “I… I want you to take me to the bedroom.”

“Then you better get your ass up.”

I do as I’m told and make my way to the bedroom, tossing the comforter off the bed and hastily chucking aside some of the extra pillows. I turn just as He enters the room and reach out to wrap my arms around Him, fully expecting to resume our makeout session. Instead, He takes a step toward me and shoves me back onto the bed. I don’t have time to protest as He flips me over onto my elbows and knees; a second later, I feel His palm connect with my left ass cheek with a loud crack and I gasp. Heat floods my body. The second smack leaves me breathless. I try to get up onto my hands, but He grabs the back of my neck with one hand and pushes me down into the mattress.

My backside in the air, I’m utterly vulnerable and yet completely relaxed. The next time He spanks me a moan escapes my lips and I clutch the sheets. Am I drooling? He pulls my panties to the center and brings His open hand down on the right cheek. I feel heat and color blossom across my skin. I desperately wish I could see the lovely red handprints myself.

My Dearest leans over me and I feel his erection press against my ass. For a split second I wonder if he’s going to take me from behind right then and there, but he reaches past my head and grabs something from the black box. A moment later my wrists are fastened together with a clip and a few inches of chain. I tug at them, savoring the feeling, when I feel His hand slide inside my underwear, His fingers stroking the slippery wetness there. I moan and grind back against His touch, and when He reaches my clit I nearly explode. He circles it, teasing, and I cum hard on His hand. He doesn’t stop. The next few orgasms leave me gasping for breath, my legs shaking like jelly, my panties drenched.

He flips me over onto my back, grabs the chain and pulls my arms up over my head. A second later the panties are gone. He grabs my thighs just above the socks and pushes my legs apart; I moan as He enters me. A thumb teases my clit again and I just want to beg for Him to fuck me senseless. He reaches over, His cock pressing deeper inside me, as He returns to the box. In my dream state I hear the jangle of metal, and my stomach does a flip when I see the clamps in His hand. The feeling of them pinching my nipples makes me squirm, and once they’re on properly he gives the rose gold connecting chain a tug. I gasp at the combination of pain and bliss, and He pushes my t-shirt out of the way so He can enjoy the view.

The moment He starts fucking me is like a sudden high. The world spirals away as I look into his eyes; there is nothing else. I think I’m screaming with each thrust, I can hear the sweet jingle of metal as I pull at the restraints and my breasts bounce with our motion. I feel my pussy swell and clench.

“Ah… I wanna cum for you!”

He grunts by way of permission, and I arch against Him, my body wracked by another orgasm. My brain is white noise now, incapable of coherent thought. His breath catches, and I hear Him groan, “Shit, I’m gonna cum inside you.”

“Please.” One, small word is all I can manage.

He buries Himself inside me and explodes, filling me with liquid heat. I’m still riding out my last orgasm, trembling and all but crying from the overload of sensation. I feel Him relax, giving a few gentle thrusts as He leaves His load inside me. I fall apart into the pillows and try to remember how to breathe.

He reaches up, and before I can protest yanks the nipple clamps from my chest. I shriek at the sudden pain and hear Him chuckle warmly.

“I think you liked that.”

“I… think I did.” Words are very hard.

He rubs my foot and gets up to wash Himself off. As I listen to the sound of the shower, I laze in a boneless heap on the bed. I can feel the semen running out of me, cooling on my skin. My wrists and ankles are still cuffed, but that’s comforting somehow. When He comes back, He sits on the end of the bed and strokes my legs as I take the wrist cuffs off. He playfully grabs one ankle and pulls it over, but then gently unhooks the leather.

I don’t want Him to ever stop touching me.

Once I’m unbound, I snuggle close and wrap my arms around His middle with my head resting in His lap. We stay like that until I start to get goosebumps from the cold, and I kiss Him on the knee before getting up to find a snack and a glass of juice. I feel calm and at peace. He is the love of my life, my Forever Human and the missing piece of my soul. Everything else is just a bonus, but at moments like this I realize how truly lucky I am. The rest of the day passes slowly, quietly, and there is nowhere I would rather be.

[bluedalahorse]

Here are some random asks for you! ❄️

What are some of your favourite foods to cook?

How about to eat but not to cook?

What are some of your favourite board game(s)?

Do you have a cherished winter and/or holiday memory that you'd like to share?

Random fact that most people don't know? Can be about you or just something you happen to know!

Happy holidays! 🎄

Favorite foods to cook: macaroni and cheese is my absolute favorite because I don’t have to check recipes to do it anymore, and I can sort of do it on autopilot. I also like lentil soup and vegan split pea soup. Tofu and rice is another good quick meal, although lately I’ve been switching to tofu and quinoa. Bok choy is delicious and fun to cook as is broccolini. Finally, I like roasting vegetables and then putting them on top of hummus or baked potatoes.

Favorite foods to eat but not to cook: eggplant dishes! I love eggplant, especially in Mediterranean recipes, but it’s kinda finicky about being cooked and I haven’t really figured out how to do it well in my kitchen. Veggie tacos (or burritos, or enchiladas) are also fun to get somewhere other than home, because there’s a lot of little pieces that make them good.

Favorite board games: I like Mysterium, where you are a psychic detective trying to solve a mystery based on the dreams a ghost sends you. As a child I liked a game called Enchanted Forest. And while it isn’t a board game, I found the card game Marrying Mister Darcy quite fun. I played as Lydia which meant I got to cause chaos.

Cherished winter and/or holiday memories: Christmas tends to be a weird time in my life when a lot of not-so-great things happen, so I don’t know how many memories I have as far as Christmas. The roommate and I do watch Muppet Christmas Carol and the Community December 10th episode, and we read aloud the Hater’s Guide to the Williams Sonoma Holiday Catalogue every year. Winter overall though, I always liked being able to come inside after playing in the snow, take a hot bath and put on pajamas, and read books or play paper dolls for hours and hours. I liked those things normally but there was something special about doing that after playing out in the cold all day.

Random fact that most people don’t know: Hm let’s see… in one part of my family line I am descended from a guy who fell off the Mayflower. I think he was a teenager at the time? They rescued him and he grew up to have like 15 children, which means actually a significant portion of the American population is related to him. That’s the only part of my family with “blue blood” ancestry though.

So those are my responses! Thank you for the ask so I could talk through these things.

@fan-of-young-royals, I’m still working on your book recommendations ask. I just wrote down too many titles and am thinking about how to organize them…