#I wanted to put a border like all the cool kids do!

[menphinaswhitemage]

Bard level 90 obtained - 6 jobs remain

[kareofbears]

"You know," Thomas starts, putting the flowers down on the sand as he rolls his sleeves up. "How you yelled at me, back in the Glade, because I wasn't helping out?"

A breeze ruffles his hair, longer than it was a year ago, and the tang of salt doesn't register anymore. "I know, I know. You technically didn't yell. To be fair, I was new, and it's not like I had someone showing me the ropes."

He kneels on the ground, in front of where the tombstone stood. This wasn't the boulder that Vince had set up in the beginning of Safe Haven's existence--this was smaller, flatter, bordering on where the sand meets the dirt. "Now, I feel like all I'm doing with these kids is showing the ropes."

Busying himself with rearranging the flowers, he rubs his thumb on a golden petal idly. "They're doing fine. Between me and the others, things are getting done. Maybe not as efficiently if you were here, but we're trying." He pauses. "I'm trying."

Thomas' voice doesn't shake, not anymore. How can it? It's just him and Newt. His voice never shakes with Newt.

Waves crash somewhere behind him. A bird chirps, its tune lively and bright. The world continues to spin, and it's a long moment before he speaks again.

"I'm throwing myself into work, Newt." His gaze tilts skywards. "I'm working, aren't I? I build homes, I teach, I train the others. There's food, so much of it, enough for years and for anyone who wants to start a family. Last night, I woke up because people were laughing so loud near my bed--laughing. I couldn't even get mad."

Careful not to mess up the floral arrangement, Thomas leans forward slowly until his forehead is pressed right up against the slab, stone cool to the touch. "How busy?" he wonders. "How busy do I need to be until this gets better? How much more do I need to do before it starts to get better? How much more do I need to give?"

When he doesn't get an answer, Thomas lets his eyes slip close. "I'm busy, Newt. I'm busy, and I'm trying, and I'm so fucking sad."

Eventually, Thomas raises his head. He presses his lips to the top of the tombstone, smiling wryly to himself. "At least I can actually reach the top of your head like this, right?"

He gets on his feet, brushing the sand off of his pants, feeling the sun beat relentlessly down on his skin. "Tomorrow, then. Maybe it'll get better tomorrow."

[marimariposaposa]

unspoken confessions | pedri gonzález

pairing: bf!pedri x fem!reader

content: flufff, mentions of sex and pregnancy

word count: 1.1k

summary: everything that pedri wishes he could tell you

7:35am

he loooves your lip balm. the way it tastes, the sweet flavour of it and how it nicely enhances the act of kissing you, making your lips all the more soft and plush for his own. he loves using it, stealing it from your bed side table in the early mornings before he leaves for training while you soundly sleep next to him, having you apply it for him; your frame stood tensely concentrated in front of him, focused face when you swipe the applicator over his lips and smiling when he pouts at you jokingly. it’s even gotten to the point where his friends have noticed.

“why do your lips always look wet?” ferran asks him, football at his feet and pulling at his jersey to let the cool air circulate underneath it. “you don’t wear lip balm?” pedri raises an eyebrow and ferran laughs, “i think i’ve put it on a total of two times in the past month”

but he especially loves it when you put it on your lips, only for the sole purpose to peck his and transfer it over. you call it ‘saving product’ but the both of you know it’s just to steal a kiss, and he wants to keep it that way. sharing is caring i guess. it reminds him of you, in the way scents bring back memories—he just associates soft lips with you.

he also just loves to be in your space. it’s kind of a given—you being in a relationship and all, but he takes it to another level. he’s there when your brushing your teeth, sat on the toilet lid and watching you in the mirror, sometimes he even takes the toothbrush and moves it around your mouth for you. wanting to be in your area and admire you from as close as possible. safe to say he’s completely whipped with just your presence, your aura, your warm energy that just calms him.

he’s there when your cooking. getting all in your way as you squeeze past him to grab some more ingredients, hands placed flat on your shoulder blades when he peers over your shoulder to see what exactly your doing and leaning down to put his head on your shoulder. “you’re in my way” you whine, turning yourself around to give him a quick peck. “im helping!” he says, suddenly taking an interest in chopping the vegetable that you’ve left out on the counter, only to get you off his back. “yeah, helping to be a pain in the ass.” you scoff when he returns back to his old ways, observing your every move and hugging you from behind like some sort of teddy bear.

if you let him, he’d even sit on the edge of the bath while you peed, not wanting to stop the conversation you were having and lose his train of thought. blabbering away while his gaze focuses somewhere on a tile on the wall. same way he’d let you get on with doing your makeup in the mirror while he takes a quick pee break, talking while he peers over his shoulder. but if not, he’d stand outside of the bathroom door like a sulking little toddler and continue the conversation by shouting at the door, making sure you can hear.

something he’d never admit though (at least not until your ready) is how much you he really wants to get you pregnant. honestly it borders a breeding kink. it’s said offhandedly during sex, something small like, “im going to get you pregnant” but he’s being dead serious. just say the word and he’s there, boxers down and ready for some baby making.

it obvious he’s good with kids, there’s been multiple cases to be observed. but when he watches you do it, whether it be with a niece/nephew, a sibling or even just randomly in the street because babies seem to just be drawn to your presence it sparks something within him. something primal that urges him to populate the earth with mini hims and mini you’s.

you’re so gentle, so tenderly it warms his heart the way you let them wrap their tiny little fingers around one of yours, squishing their cheeks while giggling.

even when you’re baby sitting, rushing around the house with a friend’s child latched onto your hip and a phone attached to your ear to chat mindlessly to a friend while you clean, he can’t help but imagine that to be your child. together. a child that has equal parts of you and of him, to see your personality in them in the way they would protest waking up in the mornings—like you always do.

that’s why your late night chats about how many kids you guys want, what their names would be are his favourite parts of the day, face in the crook of your neck to plant soft kisses on your skin while you giggle about your future.

pedri is also not a sharer. he is not the kind to just give his friends a bite of his food for them to taste, he can be a bit stingy in that sense.

“can i try this?” one of his friends would say, “you can try whatever you want next time we come here. im not stopping you.”

but for you…for you he’s sat at the restaurant table, taking a bite of his food then reaching it over to your mouth and waiting for you to take a bite too, awaiting your approval. he loves it. “how is it?” he asks eagerly, and you hum a delicious note, spreading a smile on his face. for you he takes sips of the same drink. he awaits earnestly whenever you order a drink from a local café, for you to let him take one sip and have that warm feeling he gets when he knows that your lips have just been around the straw. it’s childish, but he sees it as an indirect kiss. 

his friends would be shocked seeing him be unfazed when you steal a fry of his plate at lunch, jaw falling open when he even offers one to you and not immediately becoming defensive. they would discuss in the locker rooms how much he loves you, teasing him about how badly he’s been star struck.

“pedri, share some that ped-D next!” gavi pranced around the locker room in a sing-songy voice after the first brunch you had with his friends, finally introducing yourself to everyone as his girlfriend—jersey slipped over his head and over his shoulders to look like hair, or maybe a make-shift vail. who knows.

“shut up man” pedri groaned, sighing as if he was mad, but the blush spreading across his cheeks gave him away instantly.

end.

angel’s note: something differentttttt something cute. hope its ur liking!!!!

REQUESTS ARE OPEN, don’t be shy:)

[vasiktomis]

Overqualified (Choso x F!Reader, 18+)

Summary: A series of vignettes over the course of which you decide you're actually pretty cool with the idea of giving Choso head.

Rating: Explicit (Minors do NOT interact). Word Count: ~7300. Tags/Warnings: Female Pronouns and Anatomy for Reader, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, First Time Blow Jobs, Social Anxiety, Vomiting (not part of the sex stuff I swear but icks are icks), Angst, Misunderstandings, Oral Sex, Mentions of Non-Con but No Descriptions. Canon-variant, nobody’s dead, everyone’s fine etc etc. Read it on Ao3 Here!

“You’re kidding, right?”

You’re all too familiar with how curses wear their expressions when they become powerful enough to learn to make them. 

In your line of work — at the level you’ve risen to — you’re often stuck with the ones that take human form. The ones that learn to mimic sounds and words and mannerisms. You’ve watched time and time again, the intelligence that forms in First and Special-grades that allows them to appear so convincingly human in such a short period of time. You learned the hard way early in your career, what it’s like to fall for the act and take pity on a curse. You’ve lost kind people to the trap of sentiment. 

You became wise to it; despite all that intelligence that came with such a degree of power, curses bore an unquenchable drive to harm humans.

You learned to see through the pleading. The crying. High-level curses learning to comprehend terror changes nothing. When you despatch them, it changes nothing. No matter how they beg for mercy, the instinct to kill you never ceases. 

It’s in their eyes, you learn.

It’s in his eyes, when the remaining students and teachers at Shibuya bring him home to Jujutsu High. A Death Painting Womb. A half-curse. You don’t need to hear the human half of it. Your mind’s made up the moment they put you in the same room as him, ordered in spite of all your protests not to kill him where he stands. He won’t harm the Itadori kid, you’re assured. The kid is safe with him. 

Choso.

You can’t even believe he’s got a name.

He sticks to the boy’s side, insisting their blood-relation while he glances about his environment with baby-fresh eyes. He’s a curse in the way he takes in information. Everything is new. Every emotion he feels borders on fresh.

Brow knitted. Jaw set. The dozens of little muscles around his mouth tighten. His eyes don’t blink for their minutes of fixation. Not until his attention is called away and Itadori leaves the room, beckoning him to follow. 

It’s in his eyes. You won’t be fooled.

He watches you like he wants to kill you.

_________________________________

Your orders keep you from destroying Choso. They force you to co-exist with your guard consistently up, and as the weeks draw on, your exhaustion builds. You manage to steer clear of him for a good month before Tsukumo weighs in with a surprisingly high opinion of him. Drinking buddies? Fuck off. That’s your job. You’re not going to be muscled out of your place at her side.

You’re confident in her opinion, of course. But it doesn’t change yours. Weakened resolve be damned — there’s no way you’re letting yourself be in the same room as him again.

…

Still, you suppose it couldn’t hurt humouring her suggestions for you to tolerate him. It’s not like you need to do much more than that. If somehow you turn out to be wrong and she starts buying free rounds for a curse instead of you, you wouldn’t be able to live with yourself. 

It’s a rainy day lunchtime when you force yourself to approach the man, holding your lunch tray over your torso in the event he makes a jab for your internal organs as you join the line. 

He glances at you once. Twice. Aborting a too-late attempt to reach for a rice bowl when you snatch one from the warmer and take a step forward to force him along.

Fear. Good. He’s learned fear. 

Your tongue readies in your mouth. Your throat runs dry. 

“Shitty weather.” You manage.

His head whips around. Eyes bug out of his skull as he turns to regard you. There’s that clench in his jaw again. 

Choso does not respond. His posture changes, dipping down. Momentarily, you ready yourself for an attack, flinching to keep yourself from countering when he makes a sudden lurch for as many items he can reach. Shoving them onto his tray. Half a cup of steaming miso soup spills into his sleeve as he reels back and around you, storming out of the line without a word. 

You eat your lunch at the window. Watching as he eats his on a step in the pouring rain, glaring into the middle-distance. 

He must know you’re onto him.

_________________________________

The weeks drag on. Somehow, it feels simultaneously like your every move on campus grounds is watched by the half-curse while your every attempt to observe him close up is met with a hurried getaway. 

By social means, Choso develops quickly. He still spends most of his time by Itadori’s side, but he begins to branch out. Much to your chagrin, the staff warm to him, too.

It isn’t long until they have the kid hooked up to you, much like Nanami’s old role before his run-in with the disaster curses knocked enough sense into him to go part-time. It pissed you off the first you hear about it; it had to be Choso’s doing. He must have known that you’d had it out for him and he was going to try his luck separating you from your peers after gaining Itadori’s trust.

You knew it. He was plotting to kill you.

Then, you find out that it was Itadori who’d requested you as a mentor, and the wind gets knocked out of your sails pretty fast. 

It starts with a “Teacher!” Bellowed across the walkway. You’re hunched over, sipping from a faulty water fountain that the students seem to find great entertainment shoving twigs into to mess with the pressure. You know the kid’s voice well enough that embarrassment creeps up the back of your neck. 

You straighten out, wiping your mouth on your sleeve, angling to look a little less lame after being caught at the mercy of a shitty fountain. “Itadori.” You greet the approaching boy. The only acknowledgement you offer his company is in your periphery. Were it not so rude, you’d close one eye so that you only have to look at the kid while you regard them. “Looks like you’re my new protege.”

There’s a pause.

Itadori looks between you and Choso, waiting for the two of you to exchange your own greetings. 

It doesn’t happen.

More and more, Choso watches you with those unblinking eyes. Your focus is drawn. Minutely, you realise, he’s trembling. 

“You — you know! It occurred to me that you haven’t properly met my half-brother.” Itadori ventures to break the ice. “Figured it would be nice for you two to know one another if we’re going to be learning from you.”

We’re.

You’re not a two-for-one deal. You never agreed to help train a curse. 

“You don’t say.” You mutter, finally meeting Choso’s eye. Alright, then. Just because you like the kid, you’ll humour him. “Hey.”

There’s no answer. Not right away. Not until there’s an elbow nudging at Choso’s ribs. His adam’s apple bobs in a visible gulp. 

“H-“

That’s all he manages before a mouthful of bile sprays out of his mouth. He has good reaction time, you’ll give him that. But it doesn’t help his cause. It just spills between his fingers as he tries to cover his face. You’d liken it to placing one’s thumb over a garden hose.

Itadori, meanwhile, springs into a panicked attempt to get between the two of you, shielding Choso from view with his body. “Haha! Okay! Great, so we’ll be seeing you!” He exclaims, alternating between leading his doubled-over brother back the way they came and waving at you. 

Once again, you watch. Once again, perplexed. 

“That was good, but it could have gone better. Next time, don’t throw up, okay?”

Anxiety vomiting.

Huh.

You’ll admit — this is a first. 

_________________________________

Okay, maybe he’s not so bad.

Sure, he can hardly formulate a sentence around you, but at least the lack of interjection makes it easier to focus on Itadori’s development. Is Choso’s presence a constant irritation? Absolutely, but not unlike his little brother, you grow accustomed to his presence. That’s not to say that you’d ever grow to care for him to the same extent you do Itadori. In fact, the only reason you keep your trap shut about having him along for the ride is for the kid’s sake. 

One thing that does start to irk you, however — even moreso than being stuck with a half-fucking-curse in your downtime, is how quickly Choso develops an opinion on your teaching style.

Rather, how critical he becomes of it. 

First, there’s a huff. A sharp exhale out his nose marking disdain when you call Itadori back to rest. It builds from there. Pointed looks. Scoffs. A subtle rolling of his eyes when you snap at the kid to watch his blind spots over the passing weeks.

You’re sure you might end up killing him unprompted at this rate. 

“You ought to praise him more.” Is the first full sentence he manages to get through when you’re alone with him. Itadori has left the two of you alone in a booth at CoCo Curry to excuse himself to the bathroom, and Choso jumps at the opportunity to level his criticism at you.

It’s a miracle he’s even speaking to you at all, you think at first.

Then, once you’ve registered what he’s said, you think it’s a miracle you managed to refrain from bringing your spoon down through his hand.

“Excuse me?” You seethe. “For your information, he does this every time. He always picks extra hot. He always empties the shaker when it gets brought out. He’s always shocked when he has to run off and shit himself before he’s halfway done.”

“I know that. His courage is unmatched.” Choso bites back, twisting in his seat to face you. “That’s not what I’m talking about. You’re too harsh on him in training.”

Where is all this bravery coming from all of a sudden? Is this really how protective he gets around the kid?

How misplaced. How sentimental. If you weren’t a sorcerer you might be moved by what comes off as brotherly affection.

You won’t  fall for it. 

A snarl curls at your lip. “Where do you get off, talking to me? You wanna give me life advice next? Wanna apply for my job? How many months have you been living outside a test tube, huh?”

“I’m only talking to you because I’m looking out for him.” He glares.

“Yeah, you and me both.” You dismiss him. “Look. I’ve got big shoes to fill. Itadori’s last mentor was hard on him. He’s closer to that guy than I could ever hope to be, but at least I know he listens to me when I boss him around. I’d rather the kid be covering his bases and coming home to me alive, than letting too much praise to go his head and getting him killed."

Choso doesn’t reply for a moment. His gaze remains hard, bottom jaw jutting out like a petulant kid. After a moment, he breaks away, redirecting his glare down at his emptied bowl. 

“He respects you a lot. He looks up to you.” The man mumbles, crossing his arms and sinking down in the booth. “Please praise him.”

The two of you sit in stubborn silence for the better part of half an hour, until your student returns from the bathroom with an exhilarated huff. You can practically see the stink lines radiating off him.

“Whew!” The kid exclaims, throwing himself down beside Choso. “Aw man, my food’s probably cold.”

Yeah, whose fault is that. 

“Hey. Itadori.” You grumble, earning the kid’s attention.

“Hm?” He perks up, mouth full. 

“You did well today.”

You’ve turned your attention to the menu, scouring a drinks menu you’re far too full to even consider ordering.

In your periphery, Choso sits up a little.

_________________________________

You don’t make a secret of where you live. In the Jujutsu world, generally speaking (with Tsukumo being an enigmatic exception), the more secretive one tries to be about their lifestyle, the more curious it makes everyone else. You watched Nanami learn this the hard way after his return to the job and the sheer effort he put in for a while there to ensure no one knew how to contact him outside of work hours.

Of course, everyone wound up with his landline number and personal address whether any of you visit him of not. 

It helps, having everyone generally know where they stand with you, anyway. ‘Emergencies only’ tends to be your rule. Approachable on campus and on the street, but home time is home time. Only show up if you’re in need of help. Or if you’re bringing free stuff.

So imagine your surprise when you open your front door and find Choso of all people, not at eye-level, but on his knees at your feet, forehead stamped to the doormat.

“What the fu-“

“Forgive me.” The man’s voice wobbles. He doesn’t move from the bow. You take the opportunity to look right. Left. Right again. Scanning for Itadori to come bounding over to escort him away from you once more.

Today, Choso is alone, but the thought of being attacked by him has dimmed to embers by now. You’ll chide yourself for it later, you think. 

Right now, you’re more concerned with not drawing too much attention from the neighbours. 

“Woah. Hey.” You crouch down. Choso flinches at your fingertips brushing his shoulder blade, but he doesn’t withdraw. Once again, he just starts trembling. 

Man, he really is the sensitive sort.

He better not throw up again. Not while you’re close enough to be in the firing line. 

“Forgive me.” Choso repeats. “I’ve been rude to you. I’ll try harder from now on. Let me redeem myself.”

“Okay! Okay, you’re forgiven, you’re redeemed. Now would you get up? I wipe my feet on that mat.” You hiss, tugging at his sleeve. This time, he gets the hint, getting to his feet and regarding you with an expression resembling hopeful and a patch of grit on his forehead. 

In spite of all the confusion, you’ll admit, he’s cute. In a — born sexy yesterday  kind of way.

In spite of yourself, you tug at his sleeve, taking the opportunity to rub the crap off his head. “Come inside before people get the wrong idea. You want a drink?”

“No, I’d throw up again.”

“It’s not that I don’t appreciate your candor…—“ You trail, gesturing for him to take a seat on your couch. He does as instructed, scanning your apartment from left to right, committing it to memory. “Do I freak you out that much?”

Choso doesn’t mince his words. He isn’t learned enough quite yet to beat around the bush. Maybe he might not be the type, regardless. “Yes.” He nods, avoiding your gaze in favour of staring at your reflection on the TV screen. “You have every right to feel uncomfortable around me, but I want your permission to be honest.”

Frowning, you incline your head in acknowledgement. 

It’s almost like it’s the answer he didn’t want. All of a sudden, he’s not even capable of looking at your reflection. He seats himself on your couch and rubs his thumb into his palm. Holding his own hand. “I have awful feelings toward you.”

Something pricks at the base of your skull. Your eyebrows shoot up. Is this finally it? Is this your moment of vindication? Is he finally going to admit he wants to kill you?

“How awful are we talking?” You prod.

”Terrible.”

Your gaze flits around the living room for something to imbue, just in the event that he does pounce. “Uhhh, go on. I’m listening.”

“Looking at you makes me queasy.”

You abort an attempt to reach for your shark-grabber, reconsidering its promotion from TV remote reaching. “Harsh.”

“Were it not for the possibility of disappointing Yuji, I don’t know how else I’d be capable of controlling it. If I hurt you, he’d never speak to me again.”

“Well, I’m glad you’re trying to put a lid on it—“

“You’ve been putting in a lot of effort to tolerate me just so you can help make sure Yuji is okay, and I haven’t given you the same kindness. You’re good to him. It intimidates me.”

Okay, this is taking a weird turn-

“—I just can’t stop thinking about you.”

…

Heat creeps up your neck and into your ears.

“Oh.” You breathe, chest tightening as the realisation dawns on you. 

Ohh, you get it now. Despite the deviation, Choso looks guilty enough that he may as well have admitted to wanting to kill you after all. 

You swallow your pride, sitting down beside him on the couch. “You have a crush on me.”

His brow furrows. There’s that stare again. “I’m sorry. I’m not sure how to handle it. I don’t know what I should do.”

This whole time, it wasn’t aggression he’s been dealing with.

It was attraction.

“It’s okay.” You assure him for once, orbiting a fine line between emotional whiplash, awkwardness, and flattered sort of accomplishment. “You don’t need to do anything. People get crushes, it’s normal.”

People. It’s a person thing. There’s nothing cursed to it. Guilt pools in your gut. Just how nasty have you been toward the guy? Of course you’ve been freaking him out; he’s been catching up with the world this whole time and all you’ve done is make things harder on him.

And he still holds you in high enough regard to seek guidance from you, despite how embarrassing this must be?

“So what do I do?”

It’s not like there’s much of a choice. It’s not like you’ve really analysed your own feelings toward this man beyond bare tolerance at best — but you owe it to him to be sensible. You owe it to him to be a little more merciful than you would, even to a full-blooded human. Were he another sorcerer, you’d probably tell him to fuck off. Stop wasting your time. But he’s trusting you with a first that’s been torturing him.

He’s handsome, sure — but you don’t even know if you’re capable of trusting him not to end your life despite all he’s said. A single conversation can’t undo everything you’ve learned to feel.

“Well, if you wanna spare us both the discomfort, you could try asking another dude about how to handle it.” You suggest, casually as you can muster. “Not your teenage brother. Find an adult.”

Choso nods. You sense his tongue shifting behind his teeth. Considering asking why not you? But he seems to realise the implications by sheer instinct. The kind of conversation he needs to have can’t be with you. Not without altering your relationship before it can even find its feet. 

“Yeah.” He agrees, not quite able to hold eye contact with you for more than a few seconds at a time. “I’ll do my best.”

You’re getting sick of this. You’ve never heard such sincerity in your life. 

Oh, fine. 

You offer him a smile. Another first.

You’d fuck him.

_________________________________

You could never get sick of this.

“Saved you a spot.” Choso’s platforms lift off the seat beside him before you have a chance to notice the half-dozen empty alternatives. You do, however, become painfully aware that you’d been on your way to sit beside him anyway. There are plenty of alternatives. Years-long professional and personal relationships scattered all around the room, but your recent months with this one in particular have made him a begrudging favourite.

“Yeah, yeah.” You grumble, slumping down with a huff.

He’s been ten times easier to handle since your little deep-and-meaningful. As much as you hate to admit it, he’s actually been kind of a cool guy to hang around. 

As much as you hate to admit it, you can’t help but indulge in the idea that it’s probably all the jerking off he’s likely been doing. Nevertheless, as far as your increasing curiosity imagines, he hasn’t broached the topic with you since. 

“Bring my Kagome?” Choso asks, prompting you to hand him your bag to search through.

“Didn’t miss anything, did I?” You ask.

“Competition’s started, but no one’s made contact yet.” Utahime answers from up front, not bothering to break away from the screens showcasing the exchange event’s progress.

Beside her, Gojo sinks further into his seat. His head lolls against the arm rest. “It’s so boring in here with you lot. Hey, Utahime, why don’t you embarrass yourself for everyone’s entertainment?“

The ensuing squabbling is quickly dulled to you as Choso hands your bag back, stabbing a straw into the juicebox he’s withdrawn. Both of you watch the screens, looking for your protege in particular. 

“Yuji’s trying to group up with the other Tokyo kids.” Choso mentions, fingers brushing yours without flinching when you hand the box back after he offers.

“He knows he doesn’t have to do that, right?”

”Depends on how bored he gets on his own.”

Your comment causes Gojo’s head to dip back, angling his attention at you. His mouth opens, but no sound escapes him. 

His attention shifts to the side of you. 

“Hey, why does he get a juice?”

“Pipe down and watch the competition!” Utahime barks at him. Curiosity draws her attention up and back to you, however, gaze dropping to the drink in Choso’s hand. “Hey — is that berry salad?”

“Berry salad!” Gojo whines. “C’mon, share.”

You watch in your periphery as Choso leans forward, and the two up front stretch out an arm each. Gojo’s spindly limbs have poor Utahime beat, but Choso carries the prize just barely out of the man’s reach.

He holds it out to you instead.

You don't even mind that half the sip is backwash. It's nice being the favourite of your favourite.

One of these days you really ought to blow him.

_________________________________

The doorbell rings.

Habit has conditioned you to expect Choso at your door. When you open it, however, you’re made aware of two surprises: a plummeting excitement that had no right building in the first place that the person bowing at your front step isn’t the man in question, and secondly, that it’s his brother, your protege that stands in his place.

“Oh, for the love of-“

“Teacher!” Itadori exclaims, bent from the hip at a perfect right-angle. “Please date my brother!”

…

What the hell is wrong  with this family?

Your throat closes on itself as you claw for a response that doesn’t involve punching this poor child in the back of his head. “Wha—! Who told you I — get off my property!” You bark, heat flushing your ears.

“I thought you rented.” Itadori straightens, confusion tugging an eyebrow up.

“That’s beside the point.”

Then he’s dropping right back down again. “Please date Choso!”

Choso. What’s he been telling the kid? Did he go back on his word and seek relationship advice from a teenager? Is he trying to kill you after all?

“What gives?!” You snarl down at him. “I’m your mentor! Would you pull this kinda shit with Nanami?”

“To be fair, Nanami is the one person I wouldn’t pull this with.” Itadori protests, holding his hands up in defense. “Date my brother!” 

“Agh!” With that, you slam the door on the kid. “Learn some damn respect! Jeez, I’m starting to get where Utahime’s coming from.”

There’s a grumble behind the wood. A defeat well-picked.

“Fine. See you tomorrow.”

You pinch the bridge of your nose. “Yeah, yeah. Think about what you want for lunch.”

_________________________________

The moment you wrap the training day and send the kid on his way, you snatch at Choso’s sleeve before he can shuffle off after his brother. “What the hell did you tell him!”

The man flinches at your touch. He frowns hard. “I didn’t tell him anything.” He grunts back, shrugging uncomfortably away from you. “You told me not to. Why are you mad?”

“Don’t jump to calling women angry. It’s anti-feminist.”

It doesn’t immediately occur to you that with just yourself and Tsukumo being the only adult women Choso knows, he probably hasn’t had much interaction with the women’s rights movement. Nevertheless, he runs with it.

“Okay. You’re not mad.”

“I am  mad! Why’s your little brother knocking on my door telling me to go out with you, huh?”

“What?!” Choso whips around, regarding you with terror. “Yuji?! I only talked to Ino-“

Your fist collides with your palm. “Ino!”  You seethe, content to settle on such a target, at least until Choso taps his index fingers together. Almost…like he’s counting. 

“— and he gave me some advice, but he couldn’t help me with one question I had. So I asked Ijichi, but he didn’t have an answer for me, either. So then I asked Tsukumo, and she couldn’t —“

Great, just great, you think, zoning out while the man continues to list off the names of almost every adult you interact with on a regular basis — the entire faculty staff and beyond know. Serves you right for trusting any one of those jackasses to keep a secret from a child.

You relent, if not at his sincerity, then at least just to escape the roll-call. “Okay. It’s fine. It’s all right. We’ll figure it out.” You sigh. “In any case, did you get an answer for your question?”

Choso pauses. Averts his gaze. “No. Well, Nanami gave me an answer he said works, but it’s not something I want to do.”

“…Can I help?” You offer.

“You said-“

“I know, but you’ve exhausted your other options.”

The look on his face is nothing short of defeated. You are not  the person he wanted to have to ask. 

“Can I take a raincheck?” Choso asks.

You touch a hand to his arm, an assurance of support. After how many months of progress, he shifts away from contact for a second time today.

Months ago, you would have felt relieved by such a rejection; now, it pools hollow and worrisome in your gut.

Something’s changed. 

“Yeah. It’s fine.” You lie. 

_________________________________

Weeks pass. It feels like an eternity.

You’re beginning to adjust to walking just yourself home again.

Choso seems to make himself scarce in your life what ever way he can, and where he can’t, he puts as much distance between himself and you as possible. He doesn’t look at you anymore. He doesn’t speak to you. You’re not the sort to reach out; you’re plenty used to people disappearing from your life without a trace — but this feels different. 

There’s no one to remind to take their big stupid giant shoes off at the step when you enter your flat.

It’s quiet. Lonesome, a needier person might call it.

Had you not convinced yourself this was something you’d wanted from the start, you’d confront him about it. Ask him why he’s avoiding you — but what would that fix?

What would you hope to get out of closure? 

You should be relieved that he’s lost interest in you. You should be over the moon that he ejects from conversations entirely upon your arrival. That he stands up and moves to the opposite side of the room should you put yourself in an empty seat beside him. 

Your life is no longer haunted by his gawking presence. Itadori shows up alone to his training sessions, and were you not hell-bent on putting on a show of relief at Choso’s absence to the rest of the world, you’d stoop to asking the kid what the hell was going on. 

As little as you can convince yourself any longer, you’ve got to convince the rest of the world. 

You don’t give a shit.

Pulling the fridge door open, you pull a juice box out of your bag and place it back on the shelf you’d plucked it from this morning.

Yeah. You’re fine. You’re great, actually. 

You don’t even fucking like berry salad. 

_________________________________

“How do I stop?”

You stare at the man in your doorway, halfway caught between dumbfounded and furious.

He stares back, refusing to elaborate for you.

“Are you kidding me? You haven’t spoken to me in months-“

“You promised me I could take a raincheck.” Choso says. “I’ve tried everything. Tell me how to make it stop.”

You should turn him away. You should say something awful and hurt him. Make him think twice before daring to get under someone’s skin the way he did yours.

A muscle in Choso’s jaw tenses. That would’ve been all it took, and you hate yourself for that much — but then he hits you with a staggered, weak little: “Please.”

“Make what—…ugh.” You relent, stepping aside to let him pass. “Shoes.”

He’s already stepping out of them, padding through your hallway on his way to the kitchen out of sheer habit.

“Don’t even think  about taking a Kagome.”

There’s a grunt. The fridge door closes. 

Choso’s stepping back into the living room when you’ve caught up with him. “I’m…really sorry.” He fiddles with his hands, shrinking into himself under the heat of your scrutiny. “I’ve—…missed talking to you.”

“Yeah, well I haven’t.” You snap. His gaze hits the floor, and guilt threatens to well in your throat. “I’m angry you ghosted me, okay?”

“I was trying to take Nanami’s advice.” He mumbles.

”Nanami.”

“But it hasn’t worked.“ The man continues, ignoring your targeted rage. “I asked him how I can stop feeling how I feel about you, and he told me to stay away, but I can’t, and I don’t know how to stop, and I know how sad it’s making you, but I can’t—“

You snap out of your haze at the wobble in the man’s voice, finding him clutching at his own sleeves, a futile endeavour at self-soothing. For just a moment, his gaze locks to yours.

Fuck, you’ve missed him looking at you. How sad is that.

“Why do you want to stop?” You ask, and all of a sudden he can’t look you in the eye again. “Did I do something to make you upset?”

“Because you don’t want it.” He explains, frustration mounting. “Everything I’ve read, everything I’ve watched, it’s not one-sided. In real life, with you — it’s only me. It makes-…it makes me feel terrible.” A pit forms in your stomach as he goes on. “Do you know how me and my siblings exist? Through my mother’s suffering.”

...

Oh, fuck.

You’ve been so stupid.

How could you have not thought this through? Choso’s a sensitive guy even without the nature of his existence coming into play, and your most rational thought when he came to you with this problem was to save your own embarrassment and throw him at porn?

The only prior understanding he’s had of sexuality is forced procreation.

All this time you’ve been torturing him, throwing him under the bus. Putting the entire responsibility for his interest in you onto him, without him even understanding any of it. You’ve been leading him along under the impression that you’re not interested, that you detest him, and while that might have been true at the start— 

“I don’t want to feel the way my father might have felt about my mother.” Choso admits. “I don’t want to want someone who doesn’t want me back.”

“You’ve got it wrong.” You manage. “You’re not bad for wanting me. There’s nothing I don’t like about that.” 

Your words fall on deaf ears. He’s already far too swept up in his own thoughts to hear you. 

“Choso.”  You speak firmly, and you’re not sure if it’s the tone you take or his own catastrophising, but you’ve never seen him look more afraid of you than he does right now. “It’s not the same, I promise you. That’s not how it works. I know you won’t hurt me.”

“But it does hurt you.” Choso insists, snatching at your shoulders like he's trying to snap you out of a stupor. “I see how much it bothers you. I don’t want to make you suffer.”

Your brow knits. Maybe if you weren’t such a pussy about all this you’d admit to him that the hurt of his absence has by far beaten any negative feelings brought about by having him around. 

“You treat my brother so well.” He offers, solemnly. “You tolerate me for his sake. It makes me feel so selfish — I want Yuji to be happy and continue to learn from you — but if you choose not to train him anymore because of me, then I  won’t be able to be near you anymore either. I can’t stay away from you, but I can’t bear to make you carry the burden of knowing how I feel about you. So please, tell me how I can stop.”

"I don't want you to stop." You blurt. This time, you're the one incapable of meeting his eye. Instead, you scowl at the wrap over his chest, doing your best not to get swept up in reuniting with the scent of him. "I'm sorry for making you go through this by yourself. I hate that I drove you away and made you feel like this. You can do what you want, but you need to know that what you're going through isn't bad. It's human."

Choso tentatively runs the fabric of your shirt between his fingers. Not quite touching you. Closing your proximity all the while. You feel his breath. You feel his warmth.

“It’s nothing like that,” You promise, “because I think the same of you.”

Then, you feel the fucker smirk down at you. "Yeah, yeah, I get the picture."

"Shut up. I'm trying."

His gaze flits between your eyes and your mouth, no doubt running through the natural course of events he’s been studying in whatever material the others have had him watch. His head dips, catching your attention, and then ever lower, nose almost brushing yours.

“You’re sure.” He breathes. 

You answer by covering the distance, ghosting your lips against his. Choso’s body stiffens, leaning into you in what he must assume is how he should reciprocate. You quell the insecurity, sliding your fingers down his arm before you find your balance with a palm pressed to his chest. He’s too inexperienced to take the cue, but he’s smart enough to break away with a questioning look. The blood mark across his nose has altered its shape. Not quite as straight as it once was.

“You can touch me. I want you to.” You murmur, tugging the bands out of his hair one at a time. “I’ll like it.”

The blood mark stretches over Choso’s cheeks. A hollow breathe escapes him just as he pulls you against him in another kiss, long arms wrapping firmly around your waist. He’s clearly inexperienced, but he's a quick learner. He follows your lead, mimicking your motions. Large hands drift over your ribcage. Pawing at your waist. Then, the moment your tongue slips over Choso’s bottom lip, he’s holding your hips just shy of his own. 

“You’re sure.”

His pupils are dilated beyond belief as he holds you at bay, lacking the willpower to keep from allowing you to push back into his grasp just a little, just enough to feel a burgeoning erection jutting against your stomach.

His hairties roll onto your wrist. Your fingers toy with his locks, gathering on his shoulders. “I think,” You smile up at him, “You should show me what you’ve been learning.”

Something in him snaps. His mouth is back on yours in a heartbeat, florid, hands yanking you in against his body. A ragged hum spills from his throat as you respond in kind, snatching at his cowl, breaking away from him just to untie the thing and pulling it off over his head.

Choso isn’t much of a talker. Not yet, at least. Not while so much of his concentration is on making up for lost time exploring you. For the moment, you have to find satisfaction in pulling wordless sounds from him, learning where he’s most sensitive. His ribcage. His throat. His hipbones. It’s not until your fingertips graze his cock through his pants that he musters a breathy little ”fuck—“

His weight braces against you naturally, chasing more, confidence growing. He spends a particularly long moment squeezing your ass before he hurriedly shifts his attention — just pointed enough to have you noting that he might already be figuring out his favourites.

When Choso’s fingers paw at your tits, though — a favourite of your own — you can’t help the little noise that escapes you.

He draws back. Pupils constricted. Blood mark tightening across his face. Sensing competition.

Not today, you affirm silently, walking the man backward until his legs hit the couch and he falls into a sit. You follow, sinking to your knees between his, palms resting on his thighs.

“Won’t you?” You ask sweetly, angling for a look akin to innocent, watching Choso gulp at the sight.

“Won’t I wh-what…” He stammers. So much for competition.

Your fingers curl into the fabric of his pants. You don’t take your eyes off him. “Show me.”

Choso takes a moment, considering your words in total silence. Then, with a shuddering breath, he’s fumbling with his underclothes, juban tugging up out of the way. Flashing his lower stomach as he busies himself with pulling his cock out of his pants. You find yourself vaguely scandalised at the sight. You’ve scarcely seen more of Choso than his arms. The flat of his stomach feels oddly intimate.

His cock is just as pale as his fingers. He slowly, steadily pulls his foreskin up, though his grip conceals him for the most part, much to your disappointment. When he draws back, you lean in insistently, ignoring a little shiver on his part at how close your face gets. Colour gathers on the delicate tip, much like the hue of his eyelids. Choso draws up again, and you find your mouth running dry at the glimmer of a tiny drop of pre-cum, at least before it gets swept away by his fingers.

“If you wanted to watch so bad, you should’ve asked.” He mutters, tone chastising — yet undermined by the flush blotting his neck, and again, you make a note. He’s going to be bratty once he gets the hang of this.

“Maybe if you’d been nice about it-“

“Are you gonna let me blow you, or what?” You interject.

Choso goes silent. Eyes wide. You’d think you’d gone too far if he hadn’t immediately relinquished his grip.

You waste no time replacing his hand with your own, balancing his cock between your fingers, tipping it toward you as you shimmy closer, nudging his knees further apart.

The flat of your tongue presses to the tip, and you grin at the way his whole body seems to flinch. A hum vibrates in his chest. Flagging permission to keep going. He can handle it. You don’t have to be content with just a taste.

Your mouth envelops his cock, and Choso grips hard  at the cushion beneath him. He stops making noise altogether as your lips venture mid-way, holding his breath while you pause to run your tongue against the underside. Then, when you hollow your cheeks and pull back up, a ragged sound escapes his throat. Pre-cum spurts over your tastebuds. So much so that you’re worried he might already be done for. Waiting another moment brings nothing else, but he probably needs a moment regardless.

Sitting back on your heels, you check in, poising your wettened lips just shy of the head. Choso looks like he’s on the verge of tears. It isn’t helped by the rorschach blotting of the blood mark dripping down his cheeks like drenched mascara.

“You okay?” You check in. “You need to stop?”

“No!” He yips, sitting up, bordering outraged. It takes a moment for him to register the smile on your face as a taunt. That you’re not serious about backing out.

All the same, if you didn’t have him pinned to the couch right now, you’re sure he’d be bowing at your feet again.

“Keep going. I can take it.”

Your hand works him slowly from base to tip, squeezing out another clear, oozing droplet. You smear it back and forth over your lips, and Choso’s head dips back against the couch, scrunching his eyes shut. Poor thing. As fun as it is teasing him, you owe it to him to at least get him off.

“Just relax.” You murmur, licking your lips, brushing your tongue around the head of his cock and waiting for a minute nod on his part before continuing on. Sinking down, you take him deeper with each bob of your head, building into a steady, consistent rhythm so as not to catch him off-guard. You want to draw this out as long as possible for him. You want him at your door again, at your feet, begging you for more.

You want to be the only one he wants doing this to him.

There’s no helping a swallow on your part when he nudges the back of your throat one too many times, though, and Choso gasps like he’s dying. His posture curls, instinctively trying to find purchase on something that isn’t just the couch. His cock twitches in your mouth, and you go still.

He’s on the brink, but you’re convinced you can work just a bit more out of him with a little patience.

Choso’s hands come to hover over your head. You don’t have the ability right now to tell him you’d be fine with having his grip guide you, and without that go-ahead, he’s not taking his chances. He’s far too considerate to do that.

So he just sits there, letting himself suffer, not quite sure what to do with himself beyond entrusting that part to you.

Once his muscles have relaxed enough, signalling his body’s retreat from the orgasm that had been building, you deem it safe to resume. Starting slow and shallow once again, you earn yourself a frustrated groan.

That’s more like it. The nerves are settling. He wants  to cum, now.

You can’t help but go back on your word, just a little. You can’t help but taunt him, pulling back to suck on just the head until his fingernails are digging into his palms. Choso’s hips judder, threatening to buck up into your mouth and taking a conscious effort to be stilled. His breaths push and pull through gritted teeth, and fine, it might be time to give the poor guy a break.

Choso all but cries out when you take him all the way in again, stifling an instinctual gag when another spurt of pre-cum hits your overworked throat. You don’t let up, for his sake. His breaths come short and sharp. His cock swells on your tongue, leaking pitifully in sync with an equally pitiful sound in his chest.

“I—“ He whimpers, voice wobbling, “I’m gonna—“

There’s no curse words he’s been exposed to enough to pick out, and when Choso peaks, he does so wordlessly in a mess of gasps and groans. The first pulse of cum jets across your tongue, and you draw back to hold your mouth open, working him through it with your hand. Ribbon after ribbon coats your face as Choso keens his way through the aftershocks, only filling your mouth when the force dwindles and his body slackens.

You’d mistake him for a corpse, were he not twitching every few seconds. His eyes are fixed on your face, glassy and unmoving, mouth agape as if he might burst into tears at any moment, unaided by the running of his blood mark down his cheeks.

Sitting back and admiring your handiwork, you swipe a thumb across a stripe of cum that starts to streak down your face, watching the man with a smile. You pop your thumb into your mouth, and Choso jolts to life at the sight, sitting up, suddenly breathing again.

His hand brushes your face. His own thumb tentatively brushing across the bridge of your nose.

“Please date me.”

You’re pretty certain he’ll cry for real if you say no.

[talesfrommedinastation]

My redneck neighbor Doug watches 'The Bad Batch': The Outpost

As per many people's requests, I've collected a series of texts and Facebook messages from Doug when he watched certain episodes of everyone's favorite Copy Paste Boi show.

Some he was quite pithy on ('Ryan-from-Accounting goes fast but not fast enough to get away from the Bitch Wife Laura'), and others...well, he got excitable, to put it mildly.

Here's one of the more deranged ones, Season 2, Episode 12, 'The Outpost'. Or as Doug calls it: "The Daddy Warcrimes Christmas Special."

CW for Language like you wouldn't believe. Doug says "you'll need a permission slip from your momma to read this, I guess."

-----

Daddy Warcrimes is waiting by the Empire's equivalent of a windowless van, because comfort is just not his thing and he really wants the experience of smuggling cocaine across the border one of these days.

Some bitch who looks like she works at a bank is telling these clones that their extended warranty is up. I wanna bring her a bag of pennies and make her count it before I deposit it because I'm sick like that.

So here comes in SOME BLOND JACKASS. Mother of Hell do I hate this guy. Can I just tell you how much I hate him? I hate him like I hate the Crimson Tide, like I hate February, like I hate my mother-in-law. Hate hate hate. 

So Daddy Warcrimes, SOME BLOND JACKASS, and some homies get into Floating Probable Cause to lay waste to an unsuspecting Third World country or whatever.

Well, I was wrong! Looks like Elsa and her frozen fingers took over this dump. Disney owns both, so why not. The cold never bothered them anyway. Nope, they’re at somebody’s nasty old storage shed. Why does this remind me of visiting my sister in Wyoming?

Oh, who is this no-frills, salt-of-the-earth, son-of-a-bitch? Is that tanned Kurt Russell? No? It’s Sassy Park Ranger! I like him already. If he was my boss I’d actually show up to work on time and sober, or late and hung over, either way, it’d be a good time with the man. He just seems cool and chill and a nice dude. I bet he’s got homemade beef jerky in his locker and his beard always smells like cigar smoke. 

OH SHUT UP STUPID BLOND JACKASS, Jesus Christ I’ve never wanted to hit someone with a folding chair so hard in my life. CALL HIM COMMANDER.

Aw, Sassy Park Ranger’s being nice to Daddy Warcrimes, maybe Daddy Warcrimes will share the Columbian nose candy in the back of the van with Sassy Park Ranger, and Sassy Park Ranger won’t ask about the sobbing family Daddy Warcrimes is probably holding for ransom in the back. It’s all about understanding each other. 

This is truly the Daddy Warcrimes Christmas special, snow and friendship and stuff. I hope this doesn’t end up with Daddy Warcrimes 86’ing Rudolph and the rest of the reindeer from the sky, that would traumatize the children. But this is the same studio that produced Bambi so who knows. Didn't he try killing a kid the first episode?

Oh man, Sassy Park Ranger’s lost a lot of his men, that’s real sad. Only two left, Jesus. SHUT UP BLOND JACKASS SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP.

(I won’t repeat it, but the amount of times that SHUT UP was texted was….something else- Dr. MM)

Sassy Park Ranger’s taking Daddy Warcrimes on a hike around the place in the middle of a blizzard, probably going to say hi to the yeti hooker they all frequent and show him how to write his name in the snow with pee. He’s such a good guy. If they go sledding I’d be so happy.

Oh, shit! Daddy Warcrimes remembers that he has a job and proceeds to cop some poor bastard in the leg so he can follow the trail of blood in the snow. What in the Fargo am I watching here, does Steve Buschemi show up at one point now. No sledding in this one, I guess.

Well there goes Sassy Park Ranger and Daddy Warcrimes on a heartwarming romp following a crippled burglar in the snow as he bleeds to death. Kevin McCallister would be so proud. Well, now, they found a dead body already. You know, at this point, if Daddy Warcrimes capped Santa in the head this show wouldn’t be less wholesome. 

Aw shit Daddy Warcrimes stepped on a landmine, but Sassy Park Ranger watched his training videos that HR made them sit through and disarms it. They’re having a nice convo, I really, really like Sassy Park Ranger. If he dies I’ll be so freaking mad. 

(I said nothing, FYI - Dr. MM)

Aw shit, they found the bunker of crazy white people with guns in the snow. It’s confirmed: the Daddy Warcrimes Christmas Special takes place in Wyoming. Are Daddy Warcrimes and Sassy Park Ranger facing off my brother-in-law and his branch of the VFW near Laramie? Those guys need hobbies besides doomsday prepping and getting drunk in the snow. It ain’t right. 

“After all we sacrificed”…man. I feel right here. Is this the child friendly version of Enemy at the Gate? Shit. Please these two bastards need to survive. I need a beer and I wanna hug my wife.  

Dr. Meat Muffin, please don't tell me you're letting your babies watch this show. They need that dog from Australia who has fun with her daddy, not this.

Oh shit, avalanche! 

Oh no, Sassy Park Ranger. Oh no, oh no. Oh, Daddy Warcrimes.

Thank Christ they made it! They’re gonna save him! They’re gonna save him.

Wait. What. 

WHAT THE FUCK, BLOND ASSHOLE. 

I HATE THIS JACKASS SO GODDAMNED MUCH, SOLDIER OF THE EMPIRE, I WANNER SHOVE MY SOLDIER UP YOUR EMPIRE YOU STUPID DICK. 

FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU

Yay! Daddy Warcrimes finally took out his gun and 86’d that FUCK. CHRISTMAS CAME EARLY!! YAAAAAAY!!!!!

Man...I hope this ends okay for Daddy Warcrimes. I hope his brothers aren't just dicking around somewhere warm while he and the other bros are out dying.

Guess that'll be next episode?"

....Doug snapped SO HARD watching 'Pabu'. Brace yourselves.

[jams-sims]

There some deep analyses to be made about Tallulah and Chayanne and their brand of isolation. Like fundamentally, they don't feel like they have that deep connection with other eggs.

But putting that aside, the sunny situation. Again Sunny feeling are valid, although we all know Philza held no ill will towards her. He is always unconsciously hurting her. But I also understand where Philza coming from. Sunny has the aid of Bad (use too) and a collection of other people. He prioritize his eggs, plus I think it falls under his relationships with Tubbo. Where they refuse to be serious with one another.

But again this follows the same beat for beat problem Tallulah had with Philza. Tallulah felt unwanted, Tallulah felt like Chayanne was getting most of Philza attention, Tallulah felt like a burden. She began pulling away and it all came to a head. An in that moment, Philza had to say sorry for making her feel that way. Because even though he had no ill intentions, he still hurt her, but she had to tell him.

He is simply not aware of it and theirs an argument to be made that he should be and he should do better. But that's a deeper conversation that this little rambles not tackling.

I think it also ties into how independent philza views some of the eggs. Dapper for example, Philza is very much the cool uncle that waaay to detached that it borders on neglectful.

He tells Pepito that he is strong for always taking being forgotten in stride. When we all know Pepito is struggling emotionally. An god only knows what'll happen when Jaiden comes back. Philza aware that Pepito doesn't have anyone but is unaware of the emotional front that would take, he just thinks the kids don't want to dumbass adult getting in their way.

Richas is another prime example, that boy is sooo independent. Philza could not handle that, same with dapper. Philza believes Dapper is so strong and doesn't need an adult, but wanna know who disagrees with Philza? Bad, Dappers father, dapper is in bad eyes his Baby boy.

Philza does not think this way about his own kids. He is still struggling with the fact Tallulah indepence and change from music girlie to crack skull open girlie.

He still thinks she's a Bard when she is a warrior class now. Chayanne is more of a cleric buffer and healer. I won't be surprised if one day Chayanne said he no longer wanted to fight. (sorry got off track.)

I say all this to say, is that there is a method to the madness as in why things are like this. An it just so fascinating to break down.

[ywpd-translations]

Ride 756: The third Inter High!!

Pag 1

1: The Inter High starting line is impartial

2: Those aiming for victory

3: Those filled to the brim

4: Those who are scared

5: Everyone who put on their number bib

6: The line calls everyone to a new path

Pag 2 / 3

1: No2, Onoda Sakamichi's last Inter High!!

Pag 4

1: “Kyushu” was once divided into nine countries, and that's why it has that name*

(NdT.: The “kyuu” in Kyushu means nine)

(Currently is divided in seven prefectures: Fukuoka, Ooita, Saga, Nagasaki, Kumamoto, Miyazaki, Kagoshima)

2: It has a lot of active volcanoes, and people coexist with the harshness of nature while enjoying hot springs, geothermy, and tourism

3: Trade with the continent has been active since ancient times

4: Formerly, the distribution of goods by ships, which was the mainstream

5: Passed through the Kanmon Straits, separating Honshu and Kyushu

6: And transported to Osaka, Edo, the Japanese cities by the sea, and every corner of the country

Pag 5

1: Even today, the Kanmon Straits, which passes through Shimonoseki, and Kitakyushu City, and Moji, is the shortest route that connects the Inland Sea and the Sea of Japan, and is a key point for the shipping through sea

2: 1000 ships a day pass through the complex strait, which is 500m wide in its narrowest point

3: As for the land route

4: An highway crosses the Kanmon Strait with a huge bridge 1068m long

5: Ordinary national roads and railroads pass through specialized tunnels

6: As for bicycles and people... they use the “pedestrian bridge tunnel” at the bottom of the huge bridge

From Honshu to Kyushu, they can cross over the Kanmon Strait by walking

Pag 6

4: Waaa

We're at the bottom of the sea here?

That's right

5: So above us is the sea?

Yeah

And we can walk to Kyushu?

That's right, it's around 400m from here

Amazing....

6: There's even people with bikes

Yeah

7: Look! There's a line!

It's the prefectural border

8: One, two-

9: Yes! I landed in Kyushu!

Pag 7

1: The entrance to Kyushu is in the northernmost town, Moji, in the prefecture of Fukuoka, Kitakyushu City

Pag 8

1: This is where this year's Inter High will start

Pag 9

3: Where do I put this baggage?

Put it in the tent for now

Thank you, senpai

4: Look, The bikes are all lined up

So pretty

Pag 10

1: I took a picture

So cool

2: Two portions of Mijiko curry, please

Yessir

3: A pressure of 6.5?

Six, please

4: Do you have an allen key?

Yes

Pag 11

1: Ohhhh

2: There's so many huge buses!!

Teh!!

3: Nara

4: That one is from Miyazaki

5: Na-Nagano!!

6: And there's so many people, too, teh....!!

7: Are they participants in the race!? All of them!?

You're kidding, they look so strong!!

8: The attendance!! Is on this scale!!

So this is....

Pag 12

1: A national competition!!

2: Teh?

3: Ohh.... suddenly my knees started trembling, teh

Ho- how do I stop it, teh, Ki....

4: Kinaka-kun!!

6: Ki.....

7: “The competition is in Kyushu, so there's no way we can bring everyone along”

8: Kinaka.... kun

Pag 13

1: I'm here!!

Ah, you're here....

2: I'll be a mechanical help for the next three days

And I was entrusted to be your lucky charm

De-he.... oho, ohoho, fuhoho!! What's that enigmatic way of laughing!!

3: Don't act like I didn't come!!

No... I just wanted to reaffirm again how grateful I am that you came, Kinaka-kun...

Ah!? That doesn't make any sense

4: It does!!

Pag 14

1: Because I really am grateful to you, Kinaka-kun!!

3: And I think this jersey is for the both of us!!

5: Don't say you're grateful so directly

It's embarrassing!!

6: Let's go to the tent!!

Yeah!!

You

7: It's your first Inter High but you're not all that nervous!!

That's somehow incredible

8: Yeah!!

After all

Pag 15

1: We have the strongest senpai!!

Pag 16

1: Ohhh

Waaa

2: It's Sohoku!!

It's Sohoku, the two-times in a row champion!!

Sohoku is in Kyushu!!

3: What a terrific aura!

Waaa

Onoda.... Naruko, Imaizumi!!

They look serious!!

Are they aiming for the championship again this year!?

Pag 17

1: They're going to get their number bibs

They're heading straight for the reception!!

Yes, all the participants are lining up in a row there

2: Oi, you're interrupting....

3: Sorry-

Ah

Soho-

Waa

Waaa-

5: -ku's...... bibs....

Pag 18

1: ….. please

2: Is he..... nervous....!? The reigning champion, Sohoku!?

Did he have a nervous aura?

Maybe the two guys behind him.... were supporting him?

3: They were supporting him, but the jersey came off

5: They're going back to their tent....

So that's Sohoku... right

7: So-so- sorry, I got nervous!!

Yeah

Right

8: La-la-la-la-la

La?

La?

Pag 19

1: I was thinking it's the last Inter High!!

3: For us

Pag 20

4: Yeah

5: That's right

6: That's right, Onoda-kun

We're third years

7: It's our third and final

8: yearly grand stage

Pag 21

1: Once this is over, we'll retire

This Inter High is our last race!!

Pag 23

1: Honestly speaking, I my heart too was pounding when we were on the ship coming here

I was really nervous

2: Naruko-kun....

3: Naruko

4: But then I thought

When we were first years and ran in the Kanagawa competition..... maybe, at the starting point in Enoshima

5: The old man, Kinjou-san, and Makishima-san, too, were as nervous as we are now

Pag 24

1: They must have been

3: But they didn't show it at all to us kouhai

4: Well, we can't afford to show it, either

5: That's why, Manager, we talked and decided to go back to our beginning!!

6: We chased and caught up with those people's back, but this time we're gonna surpass them!!

7: Huh

8: We're changing our numbers from last year!!

Pag 25

1: The old man carried number 172, so I'll take number 2!!

Hotshot will take the number Kinjou-san wore, number 1!!

Pag 26

3: And Onoda-kun....

I....

7: The number Makishima-san carried

Pag 27

1: I'll run wearing the number 3!!

[running-on-a-broken-record]

What MatPat egos are like as lovers

(The Detective, MadPat, Mack, The Hermit, WarfPat, DarkPat)

The Detective: - Are you kidding? This man is the sweetest!! - He likes bringing you flowers a lot. His favorites are lilies, because they remind him of you - Physical touch is definitely his primary love language (have you seen him and Ro in Escape the Night?!) - He’s a very patient person most of the time, unless he gets too stressed out. Arguments (because, let’s be honest, they’re inevitable in all relationships) with him are rare. - He isn’t always the one to apologize first, but he makes a point to always make up for it after you’ve both cooled down

MadPat: - What?? A serial killer can’t be a good lover, right…? - Ha! Wrong! - Well, mostly. Sometimes he gets so caught up in work that you don’t see him for a whole day - I have no idea how he does it, but this man will somehow work his ass off every day at the pizzeria, and then come home and manage to give you all of his attention - He likes listening to you talk. Not always anything in particular, either. Hearing about your day, reading to him… all of it is nice. He especially likes it after a long day of work, or after, uh… his less-than-legal hobbies - If he can help it, he tries to keep you separate from the whole… serial murder thing. Though, I’m sure it’s inevitable you find out eventually…

Mack: (Crewmate & Head Engineer) - For crewmate Mack, he’s obsessed with you. But not in a creepy way. He just loves being around you, and probably even went as far as to beg the captain to put you on similar jobs so he can stay with you as long as possible - Loves forehead kisses! Both for you and for himself, but every time you two have some alone time together, it’s cuddles and forehead kisses if he has his way - Head engineer Mack is more bold. He’s less outwardly touchy, and is far less obsessed with you, but that’s mostly because he has a reputation to uphold. He’s the second-in-command of the whole shop, after all. People look up to him! - However, he does use his title and his power to keep you around him as much as possible, same as crewmate Mack. Maybe it’s you being assigned the job of cleaning the same room that he’s stationed in, or specifically keeping you from working on one particular day so you can spend the whole day with him

The Hermit: - He’s the most protective of all the egos. He knows the danger out in the world, and is very adamant about keeping you safe. - Admittedly, sometimes this protectiveness borders on possessiveness, but he’s a sucker for you. All you have to do is tell him that you appreciate his concern and that you’ll be okay. Sometimes you have to agree to take him with you, but overall, you’re usually allowed to go on your own - It sounds absolutely insane, but with him as your lover, you are treated like royalty. Sure, he lives in a cave on a (mostly) deserted island, but you have everything you could ever want. - You swear he has some kind of extraterrestrial abilities…

WarfPat: - Oh dear, let’s hope you’re up for the chaos - His love language switches like… every time you blink I swear. One day he’s all on you, hugging you, kissing you, etc. and the next, he’s giving you gifts like there’s no tomorrow - He’s overall a pretty energetic guy, but around you, he simply cannot sit still. He loves being around you!! It makes him really talkative, too, so he ready to hear him infodump about anything - You are his favorite guest on his talk show, easily. You’re a fan-favorite, he always says - He’s kind of like a teenager when it comes to some things in the relationship. Like, for example, he is a sucker for matching things. If you made him matching bracelets, he’d love you until the end of eternity (he already does but you know)

DarkPat: - I know he looks like an asshole, but it’s mostly just for show - DarkPat is a mix between The Hermit and Mack, really - He doesn’t like physical touch all that much. Not just in public, either, but all in all. He will hold your hand sometimes, but kisses make him uncomfortable when they’re unprompted, and he isn’t really one for cuddling - He makes up for the lack of physical touch with gifts. Specifically expensive jewelry. Seeing you wear it makes even him smile, and then he buys you more - Rich man fr - He also likes taking you to fancy dinners for dates, which kind of freaks out the people around him, seeing a glitching entity with too much eyeliner, but as long as you’re happy

[aster-tiger]

The Raging Witch

Zoro x OFC, Luffy x OFC, Law x OFC, Zoro x Luffy, Law x Zoro

Warnings: swearing, pr0n with plot, shameless smut, bisexuality, consensual k!nk, 3some, b0ndage, emotional slow burn, developing relationship, hurt/comfort, fluff, angst, bonding, mating (not abo), post Punk Hazard, post Dressrosa, changing pov (no head hopping), mm relationship, mmf relationship, english is not my first language, no beta we die like men

Chapter 26: Kidnapping

You can find the whole story on AO3

A silver board appeared in the sky, heading straight for the Sunny. Zoro held his breath until the board landed on the main deck. Luffy stepped off with unconscious Rage in his arms, and Zoro's heart leapt at the sight.

Rage's face was smeared with blood, which slowly dripped from her split brow. But she was here, on their ship!

"Chopper, take care of her," Luffy ordered with a grin.

The reindeer hurried over, swiftly changing forms to carry Rage to the infirmary.

"Luffy, what did you do?" Robin asked, her gaze switching between the captain and Reid.

"I kidnapped Rage, shishishishi" Luffy announced, placing his hands on his hips.

"Why is she here?" Usopp pointed at Reid.

"He challenged Rage for the captain's title, and she lost. We're under his command now," the silver-haired woman answered with a frown. She slipped a backpack off her shoulder, tossing it onto the deck right by Zoro's feet. "Here are some of her things. Take care of her."

"What? Did you know Luffy was going to do this?" Usopp pointed an accusing finger first at Reid, then at Zoro.

"No," Reid answered. "But Mira was hoping that one of the mates would take Rage away, so she packed her stuff."

It stung like a slap. Luffy wasn't even a mate, yet he did more to keep Rage by his side than Zoro.

"So you took over a crew of sociopathic bounty hunters, and you're just leaving them in Wano?" Nami got into Luffy's face, stabbing her fingers into his chest.

"I put the lady with the cool spear in charge!" Luffy explained with a proud smile.

"I'm going back," Reid stated, pointing her thumb towards the island. "Good luck. She's going to be pissed when she wakes up."

"Wait," Robin stopped her. "What were your crew's plans after we left?"

Reid's head snapped towards Robin and the women stared at each other, a tense silence hanging in the air.

Finally, Reid sighed in frustration. "We were going to use Pluton to destroy Mariejoa."

Everyone erupted in outrage, shocked by the revelation.

"But to get to Pluton you'd have to take down Wano's borders," Robin pointed out.

"We've already set up explosives. Kaido had enough bombs to level the island," Reid shrugged.

"How would you even navigate Pluton? It's an ancient ship!" Franky was furious. He was the one who destroyed Pluton's blueprints, ensuring the replica of the ship was never built.

Reid frowned, clearly unhappy with the questions. "We have many talents."

"Momonosuke does not want to open Wano's borders yet!" Nami protested.

Reid stared at her with a flat look. As if the Witches would ever be concerned with the wishes of some overgrown kid.

"There are thousands of slaves in Mariejoa," Robin's voice was calm, but Zoro knew she was shaken by the plan as much as everyone else. "They all will be killed if you use Pluton's full firepower."

"I'm sure they're already wishing for death," Reid stated, her voice hard as steel. "The world would be rid of the Celestial Dragons, the scourge that lasted for centuries. Sacrificing a few thousand lives is a small price to pay."

"Hey!" Luffy exclaimed, his gaze fixed on Reid. "I'm your captain now, and I won't allow you to go through with that plan!"

"Tch," Reid made an annoyed sound and crossed her arms. "Without Rage, we wouldn't be able to do it anyway."

"Why?" Robin inquired.

A door slammed somewhere on the upper deck, then another and another until all the doors were banging as if they had a mind of their own.

"What's going on?" Someone shouted as the ship began to sway, leaning precariously closer to the water with each wobble.

"She's doing this!" Usopp screamed, pointing at Reid.

She was effortlessly balancing on the wobbling deck, one of her fingers ticking from side to side in sync with the ship.

Zoro reached for his swords, unsure what the woman might do next. She obediently brought Rage to the ship, but it didn't mean the Witches didn't have any ulterior motives.

Reid stopped when all the crew's attention was on her. The banging ceased and the ship sailed smoothly again. The woman outstretched her hand, hovering her palm above her surfboard. The board floated in mid-air, gradually shrinking until it fit into her outstretched palm.

"I can control any mode of transportation," she revealed, dropping the board to the deck. It landed with a soft tap returning to its original size. "The plan was to retrieve Pluton, shrink it until we reach Mariejoa. Then bomb the rotten place until there's nothing left but a gaping hole in the Red Line."

"It would require an immense amount of stamina to use a devil fruit for such a long time," Robin commented, her posture visibly tense.

Reid nodded in agreement, maintaining a neutral expression. "Yes, that's why Rage's devil fruit is crucial for the plan. She could have replenished my strength until we reached the Red Line.”

"Rage can't use her powers that much," Zoro protested, tightening his grip on Wado. "It would shorten her life span or even worse."

"That's why you should be grateful to your captain for kidnapping her," Reid replied, her piercing gaze locking onto Zoro. "This mission would've been a one way ticket for all of us."

"You're all insane!" Nami seethed, her fists clenched tightly at her sides.

"That may be true," Reid replied. "But I think you don't understand us because you haven't suffered enough."

Nami recoiled as if she had been slapped.

"Stop that," Usopp protested, standing in front of Nami.

"You can return to your crew," Luffy's calm voice cut through the commotion as he stared at Reid with an unreadable expression.

"As you wish," Reid replied, stepping onto her surfboard. "Do you want me to pass any orders to the crew?"

"Stay put in Wano and don't cause any trouble."

A crooked smile crawled on Reid's lips. "Aye aye."

In a blink she was in the air, racing towards the island without glancing back.

Zoro released Wado and turned towards the crew. Everyone was silent and unmoving, until Nami threw Luffy a hurt look and walked off towards the girl's quarters.

"I'll make her favourite dessert to cheer her up," the cook took a last drag from his cigarette before putting it out and heading towards the kitchen. He paused beside Luffy. "I hope you have a plan on how to handle this situation. I'd hate to see Nami-san hurt."

Zoro was sure that Luffy had no plan beyond bringing Rage on board. Anger boiled inside him as he stomped towards his captain. He grabbed Luffy's arm and pulled him towards the men's quarters.

How could he not have realized that Rage was planing a suicide mission? He had let her go so easily, simply because he respected her wishes to achieve her goal. But she lied! Fuck her wishes, from now on, she was clearly not to be trusted. How could she have left him and Law behind, all the while claiming to love them?

He slammed the door so forcefully that it nearly came off its hinges.

Fuck her wishes! He was determined never to let her out of his sight again!

"Zoro," Luffy's confused voice cut through the furious haze clouding his mind. He spun towards his captain, pressed him against the wall, and smashed their lips together in a furious kiss.

Luffy let out a surprised gasp, but opened his mouth for Zoro and reciprocated the kiss with as much fervour. Their tongues tangled together as their teeth clashed and their panting breaths mingled.

Zoro jerked back, ending the kiss as abruptly as he started it. He locked eyes with Luffy, his breath coming in heavy pants. "You saved her," he whispered, then dropped to his knees.

He grabbed Luffy's shorts and yanked them down, leaning forward to suck Luffy's cock into his mouth.

"Oh, fuck," Luffy groaned in a strained voice as Zoro swallowed his cock to the base.

A pair of hands grabbed his hair, while Zoro sucked his captain's cock with everything he had, channelling all his anger and gratefulness into the act.

It took only a few minutes for Luffy to come with a strangled cry. Hot cum splashed on Zoro's tongue and he swallowed every last drop, lapping on Luffy's cock until his captain's grip loosened. He slid to the floor, facing Zoro. He panted heavily while watching the swordsman through hooded eyes.

"I almost lost her," Zoro uttered, something inside him crumbling. "You saved her."

Luffy's eyes widened, and he reached out, enveloping Zoro in a tight hug.

"It's ok," Luffy's voice sounded ragged. "Nobody's dying on my watch. Not anymore."

An explosion shook the ship.

They were both on their feet and out the door in a heartbeat.

"LUFFY!!!" Rage bellowed, fragments of the shattered door to the infirmary scattered by her feet. Her yellow eyes burned with fury as she scanned her surroundings. "Turn the ship back to Wano!" She barked at the crew.

"You're not going to Wano!" Luffy yelled at her. "I won! You and your crew are under my command."

She wasn't listening, fury burned in the bond, consuming any reason.

"Turn this ship around or I will sink it!" She threatened pumping haki into her fists 

"Like hell you will," Zoro barked out, reaching for his bandana and stepping in front of Luffy. "Let me handle this," he said to his captain, tightening the bandana on his head and reaching for his swords.

"Do what you have to," Luffy replied as Zoro stepped towards Rage.

"Don't fuck with me Zoro," she growled through clenched teeth, falling into a fighting stance. "I'll do whatever it takes to get off this ship."

"You're not going anywhere," he replied, slipping Wado between his teeth.

The air cracked around him as a wave of raw power hit him through the bond. His body curled on itself under the pressure, he bit hard into Wado's handle, holding his ground.

STAND DOWN

The command came through the bond like a thunder, overwhelming all his senses. Conqueror's haki pushed into his mind, obliterating every thought in his head.

He felt his grip loosening on his swords, his body obeying the order.

NO

He recoiled from the trance, his consciousness snapping back in place. He gripped his swords, focusing all his willpower into one strike. Enma sang in his grip, responding to the new kind of power that burst from Zoro.

He focused the energy on the bond and thrust it towards Rage.

How dare she use the bond to control him! He's nobody's slave!

She let out a stunned cry, and her hands fell to her sides, the armament dissipating.

"Zoro," she uttered in disbelief, her eyes going wide. "You have Conqueror's haki." 

All the fight seemed to evaporate out of her at his display of power.

"You bitch!" Zoro shouted, pumping his anger into the bond. "You wanted to throw your life away!"

She recoiled at his words, shock written all over her face. "What?"

He yanked Wado from his mouth to shout at her. "Your fucking crew let you go! Reid brought you on board and told us everything," she took a step back, flinching from the force of his harsh words. "How could you, Rage?! We are bonded, and you choose to throw your life away!"

"I was-"

"Shut up!" he barked, fury swirling inside him, painting his vision red. "For how long have you planned this? How long have you lied to us?'

She gritted her teeth, keeping her mouth firmly shut.

"Answer me, Rage!"

"Since Usopp told me about Pluton, when we sailed for Wano!" She yelled back, balling her fists by her sides.

Zoro pinned Usopp with a glare and pointed the tip of Wado at the sniper. "You talk too much."

Usopp raised his hands in a placating manner and took a few steps back, his entire body shaking. "How would I know that she would take the ship to commit genocide!"

"Shut up," Zoro growled. Usopp yelped and jumped behind Jinbe.

Zoro pointed his swords at Rage. "You renounced your entire family, even killed your mother's mate to keep her away. You made enemies with the Red Hair pirates, convinced both me and Law to let you go, all with the sole purpose of throwing your life away. Too bad your crew abandoned you. You won't go back to Wano, and you won't be taking Pluton. Whether you like it or not, you're staying with us. I'll even put you in chains if that's what it takes to keep you here."

Rage squeezed her eyes tightly shut and her entire demeanour deflating under the weight of his words. Her will to fight crumbled.

"Robin, Franky," Luffy's calm voice carried over the deck. "Take her to my quarters and lock her up."

Zoro watched as his crewmates approached Rage. Robin placed a hand on his mate's back, gently guiding her towards the back of the ship. Rage obeyed, listlessly following Robin's guidance with head bowed in defeat.

Luffy stepped beside him, his hand resting on Zoro's shoulder with a firm squeeze.

"Good job," Luffy praised, catching Zoro's gaze. "Are you okay?"

"I will be," Zoro replied, sheeting his swords and removing his bandana. "Since when do you have your own room?”

A wide toothy smile spread across Luffy's face as he clapped Zoro on the shoulder. "Remember when we sailed with Romeo, and he gave me my own room? It was pretty nice to have a space when we didn't have to worry about anyone walking in on us. So, I asked Franky to make a separate room for me, you, and Rage."

"Well, fuck me," Zoro's brows shot up in disbelief. You actually had a plan to make her stay with us."

"Shishishishi," Luffy laughed contentedly. But then he leaned in, grabbing Zoro's shoulder, and their chests pressed together. Zoro's eye widened as he found himself pinned under Luffy's heated gaze.

"That was really hot what you did there," his captain's voice turned low and teasing. "I want you to fuck me with the same attitude you gave her."

Well, fuck. Zoro's lips stretched in a predatory smirk, while his cock shot up in reaction to his captain's words.

He pulled Luffy by the front of the shirt to the nearest empty room.

—-----------------

Rage paced the room. She had been imprisoned in many places in the past, some of them quite nasty, but as far as holding cells went, this was the nicest she had ever seen.

The room was spacious and bright, featuring a large window adorned with actual curtains and drapes. Curtains! Heavy fucking, dark green suede curtains! In Luffy's room! She growled in annoyance at the sight as she continued pacing

A large portion of the room was occupied by a bed. The thick mattress, big enough for five people, rested on a reinforced ornamental metal frame. The crisp white sheets were incredibly soft, and Rage was certain they must have cost a small fortune.

She turned away from the bed with a huff of annoyance and approached a heavy desk made of dark polished wood. It was a beautiful piece of furniture, with its shiny top completely smooth and devoid of even a single scratch. No wonder it looked unused, did Luffy even know how to write? The idiot surely had no need for a desk.

Pushing away from the desk, she resumed her pacing around the room. Her steps grew silent as she walked over a thick rug. She recognized the pattern immediately as her eyes fell upon it. She wasn't sure how the Straw Hats had come into possession of a Kashan rug, but she was certainly impressed.

She continued to pace, passing by a large upholstered armchair crafted from wood and fabulously soft velvet. Opposite the armchair stood a beautiful chaise lounge adorned with gilded decorative carvings.

Next to each piece of upholstered furniture were small, round side tables. The arrangement seemed perfect for spending relaxing time with a book or lounging with friends, carrying lazy conversations for hours.

She had to admit, the room came close to perfection. However, the fact that it belonged to Luffy was a significant flaw in her eyes.

Her pacing brought her around the armchair once more, and her gaze landed on the backpack resting on the plush velvet cushion.

Fucking Mira, it had to be her idea to compromise the plan. After all Mira went through, Rage thought she would be more than eager to obliterate the Celestial Dragons. But apparently the woman cared more about Rage than vengeance. 

It never occurred to her that any of her girls would deem any personal sentiment more important than revenge. Hell, even she, with two bonded mates, had set everything aside to end slavery. And she never went through the things that Mira had endured before joining Team One.

She reached for the backpack and yanked it open. A piece of paper was wedged between tightly rolled clothes. She pulled it out and unfolded.

"If you have to choose between happiness and revenge, always choose happiness," the words were scribbled with Mira's slanted handwriting. Memories flooded her mind. Little child being slowly eaten alive by maggots crawling from their mother's decomposing body. Faeces being served on a silver platter. A woman's body being carved with a knife while she trashed against her bindings in agony.

A furious growl erupted from her throat as she crumbled the note in her hand.

What about their happiness? What about the people held captive, who can't save themselves?!

She flung the paper angrily, but it was too light and landed a short distance away with an unsatisfying rustle.

She crushed it underneath her foot and continued pacing.

No matter, Pluton remained in Wano with her crew. Even if the girls had let her go, they surely wouldn't allow anyone near the ship. Pluton was guarded, awaiting her return.

Luffy and Zoro sure as hell wouldn't let her go now that they knew of her plan. And she wasn't strong enough to fight them both. She touched the tips of her fingers to the bandage Chopper wrapped around her forehead. 

She had yet to fully recover from the battle with the Beast Pirates. She wasn’t sure if she would ever regain her previous level of stamina after using the awakened technique of her Devil Fruit. Nevertheless, she was determined to utilise every ounce of her remaining strength to fuel the plan.

The fucking plan that was currently in shambles because of Luffy. No matter, all she needed was a backup plan, and a backup of the backup. 

She figured Luffy had taken her on his ship because he wanted to bond with her eventually. The disillusioned fool. The bond between them had shattered once, only to return as they battled Kaido arm in arm. Luffy likely still believed it was possible for them to form a full bond, akin to what she had with Zoro. What he didn't know was that her hatred for him was infinitely stronger than the feeble connection they had.

She stood by the window, peering at the horizon. Mount Fuji's peak had already disappeared from sight as the strong wind carried the ship away from Wano.

All she needed to do was make Luffy and his crew's lives a living hell, so they'd be eager to leave her behind when they reached the next island.

A knock on the door echoed in the room. The lock clicked, and the door swung open. The smell of food wafted in as Sanji entered, carrying an overflowing tray.

"That's a first," she raised a brow, turning to the cook. "Out of all the cells I’ve been held in, this is the first time someone knocked on the door before entering."

Sanji crossed the room, and placed the tray on the desk.

"You are not a prisoner," Sanji explained, straightening up and shoving his hands in the pockets of his pristinely looking slacks. "Luffy said you have to stay in the room until we sail a bit further away from Wano. If the wind keeps up, you’ll be free to roam the ship in the morning."

Oh for crying out loud, this crew was so gullible. She strode towards the desk, stopping just a few steps away from the cook.

"I thought I'd get a ball and chain instead."

"We don't treat ladies in such a crude way," Sanji frowned, his words eliciting a low chuckle from her, which caused his frown to deepen. "I have a favour to ask of you."

"Oh?" She raised her brow in curiosity.

"Nami-san is still upset about the things you said to her in that club," Sanji's expression grew serious. She raked her brain to remember what she said to the navigator. "Nami had a hard life since she lost her mother. She said you remind her of all the bad stuff just by who you are and what you do."

Ah yes, she remembered the stuff she said about stealing from paedophiles. Frankly, Nami just chose a bad time to get on her nerves. Rage lashed out at her, but it wasn't anything personal. But since Sanji brought it up, the information could be useful.

"So Nami associates me with her trauma," she plucked a grape from the tray, and locked eyes with Sanji, giving him a small smile. "Don't worry. It won't take much to change that. I can make her associate me with something entirely more pleasant."

Holding Sanji's gaze, she slowly put the grape in her mouth. He stared at her in confusion until her lips curled into a seductive smile. His eyes grew wide, and a deep blush coloured his cheeks. No doubt, his perverted mind created an image of Rage and Nami together.

He was so easy to tease, this would be fun.

After Sanji left, she expected Zoro to show up and scold her. His side of the bond was simmering with anger, and she assumed he'd take it out on her. Besides the fact that she had lied to him, she had tried to control him through the bond. That was a major breach of trust. But frankly, she couldn't bring herself to care. Her own anger burned as hot as Zoro's. 

When she woke up in the infirmary with a bruised face and a cracked sternum, she believed that Zoro knew about Luffy's plan to take her away. If he was going to meddle with her choices, she felt it was only fitting to give him a taste of his own medicine, but harder.

Apparently, Zoro hadn't been aware of his captain's intentions. But it didn't matter since he had sided with Luffy anyway, deciding to keep her on the ship. She hated when people interfered with her plans. She hated Luffy. She was going to end him, slowly, meticulously, taking everything from him, piece by piece.

Later in the evening, Robin came to take her to the bathroom. The older woman didn't try to talk to her, aside from a few pleasantries. She offered to take a hot bath together, and Rage agreed.

Sitting in the steaming bathtub, she watched Robin through hooded eyes. She had gathered enough information about the older woman. Robin was the last of Ohara, the World Government had killed her mother, she was hunted throughout her childhood, drifting between various crews and shady organisations until she joined Straw Hats. Luffy had declared war on the World Government to rescue her at Enies Lobby. The entire crew had  fought tooth and nail to free her from the clutches of CP9. Robin possessed the unique ability to decipher the Poneglyphs, making her the key to guiding Luffy to Laugh Tale. Without her it would be infinitely harder for Luffy to find One Piece and become the Pirate King.

"How are you?" Robin's gentle tone disturbed her thoughts.

"Pissed," Rage replied without thinking.

Rabin gave a small nod and hummed in acknowledgement.

"Were you the one who designed Luffy's room?" she asked the woman as she sat up in the tub.

"I might have given a few suggestions," Robin replied with a small smile. "Franky did most of the work. Do you like the room?"

It sounded like a loaded question. Rage just shrugged. "It looks good. I'm not sure it fits Luffy though."

"He'll be happy to know you like it," Robin stated with a smile.

"Seems like everybody on this ship wants him to be happy," Rage remarked, keeping her expression neutral.

"Of course," Robin nodded again, smiling a bit wider. "We all love him."

Was that a warning, a peace offering or an invitation? She found it hard to see through Robin's facade. The woman had mastered hiding her true intentions to perfection.

That's why Rage liked her. She had a sharp mind and was able to see the world for what it was, unlike her crewmates.

She felt a kind of kinship with Robin, despite the fact that she was one of the Straw Hats.

She didn't expect to spend the night alone, but nobody came to her room. She managed to drift into a fitful sleep, comforted by the faint calmness from Law's side of the bond.

A knock startled her awake, and she bolted from the bed with a racing heart. Wide eyed, she scanned the room, searching for any sign of danger. Another knock on the door drew her attention. She sucked in a deep breath through the mouth, trying to catch the scent of the person on the other side. It brought up an image of a tall woman with dark hair and piercing eyes.

A deep sigh rose in her chest and she placed her palm over her racing heart. Memories of the previous day resurfaced and the panic subsided.

"Rage," a muffled voice came from the other side of the door. "Breakfast is ready. Will you join us?"

She glanced at the window. It was bright outside, with the sun already halfway towards its peak. She rarely slept through sunrise!

"Ye-yeah," she stammered, taking another deep breath and holding it in for a moment. "I just need to get dressed."

"Okay," came a short reply.

She sagged into the armchair, burying her face into her palms.

Her pulse slowed, but the grip on her stomach didn't ease. She wasn't supposed to be here. The entire plan had gone to shit. She needed to fix it, get it back on track, and return to Wano.

An overwhelming sense of exhaustion washed over her, the panic attack draining her energy despite having just woken up.

Forcing herself to move, she reached into the backpack, pulling out a sleeveless, deep cut t-shirt, underwear and black pants. After dressing, she tightly laced her combat boots, finger combed her hair, and left the room.

On her way to the galley, she stopped at the restroom. After washing her face, she glanced into the mirror and frowned. Her usually warm brown skin now looked ashy. There were dark circles under her eyes, and her lips were pale.

The fight with Luffy and the process of healing her cracked head and sternum drained too much energy. She knew she wouldn't be able to fight again until she fully recovered. She always felt better after Daria's treatments, and if she had received them consistently over the past few days, she would have been in significantly better shape. Due to the huge amount of pain she felt while using the devil fruit, Daria decided against draining people for faster recovery. Her body was too exhausted and the pain not only slowed down her healing but also led to other complications. They had decided that she would only drain people while they were sailing towards Mariejoa.

Now, thanks to Luffy, her health was fucked. Daria was in Wano, and there probably wouldn't be anyone for her to drain for a long while.

She let out a heavy sigh while applying moisturiser she found on a shelf by the mirror. Ugly, anaemic pallor covered not only her face but her entire skin. She noticed more grey hairs than the last time she looked, her clothes hung loosely on her, and she had lost weight again. Overall, she looked like shit.

Physically and emotionally, she also felt like shit. She braced herself before entering the galley. Zoro's side of the bond appeared calm and focused, but she was sure he was pissed at her for many reasons. She expected he'd give her the cold shoulder for a while; the swordsman could hold a grudge like nobody else. And this time, Law wasn't around to manipulate them into make-up sex.

As she entered the galley, a heavy silence descended, and all eyes turned in her direction.

For the first time in a long while she didn't know how to react. She wasn't exactly a prisoner, but her actions had caused friction. Nami hated her, she used Usopp to get intel, she knocked Chopper into a wall, she tried to control Zoro through their bond, she threatened to destroy the ship, and Luffy's presence only fueled her helpless anger.

The silence stretched, while she stood by the door. She dropped her gaze. She couldn't do it after all, she didn't want to be among these people.

"Sit down," Zoro's irritated voice cut through the silence, before she turned to leave.

"Do you want coffee, Rage-chan?" Sanji jumped to his feet with a wide smile,

"Yeah, she wants one," Zoro replied. "Black and disgustingly sweet. She likes it that way." He nodded at an empty spot beside him, then tugged on the bond. "Come here and sit."

He was sitting next to Luffy and opposite Usopp, wonderfull.

Reluctantly, she sank into the seat, too drained to resist. A cup of coffee appeared in front of her, accompanied by a bowl of sugar.

"Thanks," she uttered. Inhaling the divine aroma, she quickly added three lumps of sugar to the cup. The taste was sublime; Sanji's coffee was among the best she had ever had. As soon as her cup was empty, the cook was at her side with a refill.

"Help yourself to the food," the cook encouraged, nodding towards the spread of dishes.

"Thanks," she replied courtly, taking another sip. Luckily he didn't hover over her, instead, he danced away to refill Robin's cup. She didn't have much of an appetite; the sight of food made her feel nauseous.

"Eat something," Zoro gruffly ordered.

"I don't want to," she replied without looking at him. Why was he even bothering to talk to her?

"Rage," Chopper called in his high-pitched voice. "Can I check your injuries after breakfast?"

She shook her head. "They're already healed."

"Then let me do some tests," the small doctor insisted. "Just some basic blood work."

Again, she shook her head. "No need."

"But you don't look so good," Chopper persisted. "I just want to check what's wrong so I can help you."

She set her cup down. "There's no need for testing because I already know what's wrong."

"Then tell him," Zoro cut in, his tone firm.

"I don't feel comfortable discussing my medical history over breakfast," she retorted.

"You're not eating, so talk," he pushed a surge of power through the bond, urging her to obey him.

That made her look at him. "What was that?"

A slow, wolfish smile spread across his face. "What? Isn't forcing each other into obedience our thing now?"

She snorted. "We both have conqueror's haki, it cancels each other out."

"Whatever," he waved her off. "Tell Chopper what he needs to know."

She sighed. She didn't have the energy to stand her ground, so she looked into Chopper's hopeful eyes and listed the results of Daria's tests.

"Daria considered a bone marrow transplant for a while, but ten units of blood with boosters seemed to jumpstart healing. We stuck to daily IVs and four units of blood every second day."

Chopper stared at her without blinking. "I see now why Torao was so hostile towards your doctor." He turned to the cook. "Sanji, would you be willing to donate blood? You're the only one on the ship who has the exact same blood type as Rage. You're both universal donors."

"Of course," the cook replied without a moment of hesitation.

"Can you make her a protein shake with electrolytes and fifty grams of glucose?" 

"Yeah," Sanji turned to the kitchen, taking out several containers from the cabinets and measuring ingredients into a shaker. 

She felt dejected as she watched his every move. She really didn't want to drink a stinky protein shake; the artificial taste didn't agree with her at all.

"You look queasy," Chopper said as he rounded the table and grabbed her wrist. "Do you feel faint? Will you throw up? Please tell me you're not pregnant on top of everything else."

Zoro let out a choked sound and started coughing.

She considered asking Chopper for a pregnancy test just to fuck with the swordsman.

She turned to Zoro and held his gaze with a serious expression, watching his horrified face until beads of sweat formed on his forehead. They could've made an army of babies with the amount of cum he and Law pumped into her during the past week.

Movement next to Zoro made her glance towards Luffy. He dropped the meat he had in his hand and stared at her with a horrified expression. The thought that he assaulted a pregnant woman and beat her unconscious probably didn't sit very well with him.

For a moment she toyed with the idea of provoking a period and accusing him of causing her to miscarry. That would surely fuck with his head and cause a rift between him and Zoro.

"No," she turned to Chopper with an eye roll. "I got rid of all my eggs on Onigashima. It's not possible for me to get pregnant."

"Oh," Chopper's ears twitched, his expression turning worried. "Did something happen-"

She removed her hand from his grip. "Nothing you need to be concerned with."

"Here you go, Rage-chan," Sanji presented her with a tall glass of milky pink liquid. "Please drink it; you'll feel a lot better with nutrients in your stomach."

"Thanks," she accepted the glass. When the cook didn't move and continued staring at her, she took a small sip. He smiled widely, grabbed Chopper, and walked away. She turned to Zoro with a smirk. "You had a pregnancy scare for a hot moment, didn't you?"

He scowled with disapproval.

"It could've been Law's or even Kyoshiro's," she teased. "No need to stress when there's a chance it's not yours."

"It wouldn't make any difference," he replied, still scowling. "You're mine, and so would be anything that crawls out of you."

"Gah, enough," she felt disgusted at the mere thought of something growing inside her. "That'll never happen, so let's never talk about me growing a parasite."

"Parasite?!" Chopper exclaimed. "You have parasites on top of everything else? No wonder you look so anaemic!"

She dropped her face into her palm.

"She doesn't have parasites! That's not what she was talking about!" Usopp yelled.

"She said she's growing a parasite! Oh no! Is it a tapeworm? Sometimes they get so big they have to be removed surgically!"

She took a sip of the crappy, overly sweet shake, trying to block the stupid bickering.

She finished the drink as quickly as she was able to stomach the taste, but in the end, it didn't sit well with her. She bolted from her seat, running to the restroom. She barely reached the toilet before the shake violently left her stomach.

She slid to the floor and leaned against the wall. Tears welled in her eyes, blurring her vision. The few days without any treatment and the fight with Luffy had caused her to revert to the state she was in shortly after Onigashima.

A pair of big furry arms gently pulled her up to her feet. Chopper walked her to the sink, and urged her to rinse her mouth with mouthwash. The intensive smell sobered her up a bit, but black spots danced on the edge of her vision.

The cup with the mouthwash clattered into the sink; her fingers felt numb. Then she was hauled against a broad, furry chest, and the air rushed against her skin. The septic scent of infirmary hit her nose before she was deposited on a cot. The last thing she registered was a sharp sting of a needle being inserted into the crook of her elbow.

She drifted into consciousness to a sight of a wooden ceiling, the steady beep of a heart monitor, and a pleasant scent of cologne.

"Chopper, she's awake," a smooth male voice informed.

Turning her head towards the source of the voice, she saw Sanji lying on a cot next to hers, with only a small gap between them. Medical tubes connected their arms.

"How do you feel, Rage?" Chopper's voice came from her other side, and she turned her head. The movement caused her vision to spin, but luckily she was already laying down. Nonetheless, the sensation was unpleasant, and her heart raced painfully in her chest.

"It's ok," Chopper assured. "Don't make any sudden movements. You'll feel better in a while."

He removed an empty IV bag and replaced it with another. After securing the new bag, he injected something into it and adjusted the drip.

"Do you want me to get Zoro?" he asked.

"He knows I'm awake," she mumbled hoarsely, her throat dry and scratchy. "Can I have a sip of water?"

A straw was placed against her lips, and she took a small sip. The cool liquid flowed down her throat, clearing away some of the grogginess she felt. After another sip, she released the straw, not wanting to risk another bout of nausea.

"Daria didn't give me food for several days, only pumped nutrients straight into my veins," she mumbled out the first random thought that came to her mind.

Chopper scowled at the words but didn't say anything, just shook his head.

"You're so stinkin’ cute," she giggled under her breath.

"I'll be right back," Chopper scrunched his nose and disappeared from her line of sight.

"How are you feeling, Rage-chan?" Sanji asked.

She slowly turned her head toward him. "Why do you call me that? I'm older than you, and I look more like a milf than a girl."

"You still look beautiful, my dear," he replied with a toothy smile.

"Damn boy, if you weren't such a perv, I would totally do you, despite the fact you're blond," she replied, mirroring his smile.

The grin dropped from his face, replaced by a look of shock. Apparently her brain-to-mouth filter was gone.

"I could never," he flushed, the pink of his cheeks matching nicely with his blond hair. "You're Luffy's and Marimo's partner."

"And yet you still found a way to pump inside me," she giggled when his eyes grew wide. His face burned red.

"You look good when you're flustered," she mumbled with amusement as her eyes drifted shut.

Sleepiness enveloped her like a cosy blanket, and she drifted off to the sound of flustered protests.

A sense of urgency woke her up. Her bladder was painfully full, and she scrambled out of the bed towards the door, faintly registering a muffled groan of pain. She almost sprinted to the restroom, squeezing her pelvic floor muscles tightly, so she wouldn't piss herself on the way.

She moaned with relief the moment she reached the toilet. IVs were a blessing, but only when accompanied by a catheter.

She splashed water on her face, examining her reflection in the mirror. Her skin looked better; the ashy pallor was gone, but she still didn't feel quite right. The dark circles under her eyes were still visible and she felt tired.

As she stumbled onto the deck, an arm snagged around her waist, pulling her close against a naked chest. Zoro's scent hit her nose, stopping her from throwing a punch.

His hair was tousled, and he looked like he had just woken up.

"Let me help you back to bed," he mused, nuzzling into her hair.

His scent and warmth were comforting. She wound her arms around his neck, and when he grabbed her ass, she wrapped her legs around his hips. The way he effortlessly carried her to bed made her want to do all kinds of things with him. But that trail of thoughts passed the moment he laid her down. Her head sank into the pillow that smelled of Zoro, and exhaustion overcame her.

Zoro climbed onto the bed behind her.

"We're switching places," the swordsman grumbled while lying down next to her. "So you won't knee me in the gut when you need to go again."

"I didn't even know you were in bed with me," she mumbled, turning her head towards him. "Why are you in bed with me?"

"You had your one night alone to cool off," he replied, catching her gaze in the moonlit room. "You're stuck with me now."

"No complaints here," the words left her mouth without her thinking, and a heartbeat later the guilt slammed into her.

"What's going on?" Zoro sounded alarmed.

"I could've changed the lives of millions of slaves," she whispered, her gut constricting. "But I'm here with you. How can I feel this happy, when I know I'm failing so many people?"

"I don't want you to die," Zoro replied, his voice hard as steel. "You told me you were going to get revenge for your crew. That's not what would happen if you carried out the plan."

"Yes it would. It would be the ultimate revenge against slavers," she whispered listlessly, the dissociation slowly pushing out all feelings from her body. "I want them all dead."

"You are way over your head," the harsh words echoed in her head as she drifted into sleep, full of dreams of basements filled with screams and rot.

When she woke up, Zoro was gone, and the sun was high up in the sky. The Straw Hats were scattered all over the ship, busy with whatever work they were supposed to be doing. The moment Chopper spotted her, he hurried over,  bombarding her with questions about her well-being.

"Coffee first," she silenced the furry doctor with a raised palm. "I'll meet you at the infirmary after my caffeine fix. And I don't want to hear a word about coffee being bad for me. Coffee is life; you'll have to pry it from my cold, dead fingers."

Someone laughed. She didn't care. It was too bright, she was tired, the wind was loud, her limbs felt heavy, her joints ached, life sucked.

She made her way to the galley, where Sanji was busy preparing lunch. She wished she could turn off her sense of smell; there were too many scents attacking her nose.

"Have a seat," Sanji greeted her with a blinding smile. He placed his palm on her lower back and guided her towards the table. "I'll have coffee ready in just a moment."

She watched him with a frown. He moved gracefully, handling several tasks at once, brimming with energy. It made her acutely aware how bad her shape was. She barely had the strength to walk. Fuck her life and the fucking devil fruit that had ruined everything.

A tiny porcelain cup was placed in front of her. No spoon, no sugar, no glass of water.

She blinked at Sanji. Why was he doing this to her? Hadn't his captain done enough to ruin her life?

"What's this?" she asked as he continued to beam at her. "Have I offended you in any way? Did Chopper tell you to limit my coffee?"

She didn’t know if she wanted to scream, cry, or throw a punch.

“Try it, my dear,” Sanji encouraged with a confident smile. “I’m sure you’ll like it.”

His beaming smile was too much. She focused on the tiny cup, tears pricking at her eyes. She reached for the cup, deciding that a tiny coffee was still better than no coffee.

The moment the liquid hit her tongue, her eyes grew wide. It was the most concentrated coffee she had ever tasted, and it wasn't bitter at all. Instead, the heavy sweetness of sugar cane flooded her mouth.

She turned to Sanji in shock.

“It’s a cafecito,” he explained, wearing a satisfied smile. "I'm glad you like it."

“It's so good I could kiss you!” she exclaimed, while coffee worked its magic, making the world a better place with just one glorious sip.

Sanji’s cheeks turned a soft shade of pink, but his smile didn’t falter. “Your joy makes me happy,” he replied, taking a step back towards the stove where several pots were boiling over. He quickly stirred the pots and adjusted the flame, setting it to a simmer. He grabbed the wok, tossing its contents several times before dumping it all into one of the pots. “How do you feel today?”

“Better than yesterday,” she replied, taking another sip of the cafecito. She closed her eyes and let out a satisfied sigh as the taste bloomed in her mouth. “All thanks to you. I hope you didn’t lose too much blood because of me.”

“Giving you blood was never a loss,” he assured. “I’ll be glad to donate as much as you need if it means you’ll feel better.”

She squinted her eyes suspiciously at him. He was acting so nice towards her, and he only blushed when she offered to kiss him. Was he really taming his perverted side because his captain was interested in her and she was Zoro’s mate? Was this some kind of bro code, because Luffy staked his claim? But Luffy slept with Nami, and Sanji never changed his attitude towards her.

“Do you find me repulsive because I’ve slept with Zoro?” she asked, watching Sanji’s smile drop in an instant.

“Of course not!” He replied seriously. “That stupid Marimo is lucky you’re willing to have him.”

“Then why do you act weird towards me?”

“You’re sick, Rage-chan,” Sanji replied, turning to the stove. “You need to be cared for, so you can heal.”

His words were kind, but his posture was tense.

She drained the last of the coffee and slipped out of her seat. She walked towards Sanji and stood behind him, leaving just a fraction of free space between them. “What aren’t you telling me?”

He jumped in place, as if he didn’t hear her walking. He tried to turn around, but his back bumped against her chest and he froze, his face just a small distance away from hers. He was the same height as her, so their eyes connected at an even level.

She slightly pursed her lips and watched as the cook's gaze drifted down. She parted her lips just a fraction while tilting her chin up.

Beads of sweat formed on his forehead while he held his breath.

“Chopper was mad at Zoro,” the words gushed from Sanji’s mouth. “He prevented you from getting treated while we were still at Wano. Your health degraded, and when Luffy attacked you, you used up the last of your strength. Chopper scolded both Zoro and Luffy, and it was agreed that nobody would touch or fight you until you’re recovered.”

“Oh,” her lips stretched into a deep scowl, her mood dropping instantly. “So on top of kidnapping me, you are deciding for me what I can and cannot do.”

She stepped back, turned on her heel and strode towards the door, ignoring Sanji’s distressed excuses.

For a moment she considered locking herself in her room, but ultimately decided against it. She decided to take advantage of the crew’s resources, especially what she needed most: medical treatment. She headed to the infirmary, where Chopper was waiting for her. She didn’t look at him, replied curtly to his questions, and lay on the cot without a word until two IV bags were empty.

The quiet time in the infirmary calmed her anger, leaving her tired. She was tired of fighting, of planning, of all the responsibility. She couldn't achieve her goal, even though she worked on it for over ten years. Following the Straw Hats to Wano and fighting Kaido ruined her health and took away ten years of her lifespan. She knew she would never be as strong as she once was before the Battle of Onigashima. What would happen to her next while she sailed with this cursed crew? Could she survive the journey and go back to Wano to carry out her plan? Or would the next battle be the end of her? She might die. If she had to die, she'd rather make a change in the world. Dying for some insufferable boy’s dream would be the greatest failure of her life.

She left the infirmary, ignoring Chopper's sad expression and drooping ears. She wanted to be alone, so she climbed to the small deck above the observation room. Dropping down by the railing, she gazed at the horizon. Vast sea stretched around the ship without any land in sight. Her body ached, she was drained, both physically and emotionally. Thoughts of the future filled her with despair. When she was captured by Doflamingo’s minions, beaten and whipped, she thought she was going to die in a mouldy basement, reeking of sweat and piss. She survived, only to fall into Cesar’s hands. On Punk Hazard her life almost ended several times, but she pulled through. Dressrosa almost killed her when she restored Luffy’s energy. She survived, but  Wano crippled her. She went through all that struggle only to fail, she’d rather be dead.

A stream of music woke her from her dark thoughts. The tune was vaguely familiar. She got to her feet and looked down. Brook sat by the main mast, a guitar in his lap, his fingers dancing over the strings, bringing out a simple melody.

Lookin' in your eyes

I see a paradise

This world that I've found is too good to be true

Standin' here beside you

Want so much to give you

This love in my heart that I'm feeling for you

Let 'em say we're crazy

I don't care about that

Put your hand in my hand

Baby, don't ever look back

Let the world around us

Just fall apart

Baby, we can make it

If we're heart to heart

And we can build this dream together

Standing strong forever

Nothing's gonna stop us now

And if this world runs out of lovers

We'll still have each other

Nothing's gonna stop us

Nothing's gonna stop us now

Oh, whoa

I'm so glad I found you

I'm not gonna lose you

Whatever it takes

I will stay here with you

Take you to the good times

See you through the bad times

Whatever it takes

Is what I'm gonna do

Let 'em say we're crazy

What do they know?

Put your arms around me

Baby, don't ever let go

Let the world around us

Just fall apart

Baby, we can make it

If we're heart to heart

And we can build this dream together

Standing strong forever

Nothing's gonna stop us now

And if this world runs out of lovers

We'll still have each other

Nothing's gonna stop us

Nothing's gonna stop us

Ooh, all that I need is you

All that I ever need

All that I want to do

Is hold you forever

Forever and ever…

That fucking old song was so nostalgic. Some of her grandfathers used to sing it to her grandma. Old deluded saps thought that the old bag was the most miraculous woman in the world. They had an entire repertoire of old love songs, which they gladly played on every possible occasion. Grandma was always amused by their antics, and sometimes she got that look in her eyes that made Rage feel jealous. She had so many mates who doted on her, cherished her, and truly loved her. Sometimes, Rage wished she had her own mates, people who would love her no matter what.

She swiped her gaze over the ship, searching for Zoro, but her eyes landed on Luffy. He sat on the lion’s head, it seemed to be his favourite spot to sit and stare at the horizon. 

However, at that moment, he wasn't looking at the horizon. Even though they were on opposite sides of the ship, their eyes found each other. He smiled at her, that happy rueful smile, that made all the cares disappear.

The song changed to a more upbeat tone.

Now I've had the time of my life

No, I never felt like this before

Yes I swear, it's the truth

And I owe it all to you

'Cause I've had the time of my life

And I owe it all to you

I've been waiting for so long

Now I've finally found someone to stand by me

We saw the writing on the wall

As we felt this magical fantasy

Now with passion in our eyes

There's no way we could disguise it secretly

So we take each other's hand

'Cause we seem to understand the urgency

Just remember

You're the one thing

I can't get enough of

So I'll tell you something

This could be love, because

I've had the time of my life

No, I never felt this way before

Yes, I swear, it's the truth

And I owe it all to you

Hey, baby

With my body and soul

I want you more than you'll ever know

So we'll just let it go

Don't be afraid to lose control, no

Yes, I know what's on your mind

When you say, "Stay with me tonight" (stay with me)

Just remember

You're the one thing

I can't get enough of

So I'll tell you something

This could be love, because

I've had the time of my life

No, I never felt this way before

Yes, I swear (yes, I swear), it's the truth

And I owe it all to you

'Cause I've had the time of my life

And I've searched through every open door

'Til I found the truth

And I owe it all to you

The skeleton was seriously pushing it. But for a moment, she wondered how it would feel if she followed the yearning and let the bond form with Luffy. How would her life look with him by her side? The boy who never wavered, who never let go of hope or his dreams and goals. What if she shared that same conviction? What would happen if she let herself be as happy as he was?

She forced her gaze away from Luffy and jumped down from the observation room, scrambling in a hurry. The moment her feet connected with the deck, her legs gave out, and she fell forward. A bony hand encircled her shoulders, preventing her from face-planting into the deck.

“Thanks,” she mumbled to Brook, pushing away from him, her gaze averted. Her ears burned with embarrassment and impotent anger. She cursed the devil fruit, that had ruined her life, making her as weak as a fucking child.

Zoro walked up the stairs, his expression filled with concern. One glance at her and Brook, helping her stand, made the swordsman frown. He fell to one knee in front of her, presenting his back.

"Get on," he said, glancing at her over his shoulder.

“I’m not a kid to be carried around,” she protested with a scowl.

“Either you get on my back or I’ll throw you over my shoulder, you choose,” he stated firmly.

“So much for free will,” she commented, wrapping her arms and legs around him.

“Sucks, doesn’t it?” he shot back, rising to his feet.

She sighed at the jab. “Don’t hold your breath for an apology,” she whispered, brushing his ear with her lips, eliciting a grunt from the swordsman.

“Then I just have to make it even,” Zoro replied.

She huffed. “I’ve heard of the no sex rule. I can’t say I approve.”

“Nobody’s asking for your approval. There won't be any sex for you until you get better.”

The galley doors swung wide open, and the bell rang calling everyone for lunch.

“We’ll see about that,” she smiled widely, when her gaze landed on the cook. “Sanji,” she called, and the cook swirled around, greeting her with an equally wide smile.

"Hello, my dear. I've made something special for you that should be easy on your stomach," he said, reaching for a bowl and presenting it like a trophy.

"Thank you, Sanji," she replied with a beaming smile, “but I think some vitamin D would make me feel even better.” She winked at the cook.

Zoro’s head snapped towards her, while Sanji’s jaw dropped and the bowl almost slipped from his grip. “Was that a pickup line?”

She burst out laughing when Zoro unceremoniously dropped her to the chair at the table. “Behave yourself,” the swordsman scolded.

She just snorted. “Have you met me?”

“You’re not getting any, and that’s final,” Zoro looked pissed.

“That’s your resolve to keep, not mine,” she replied, winking again at Sanji. “Oh my, did I upset you, Sanji? I don’t know what’s gotten into me, but I wish it was you.”

Zoro’s expression turned incredulous. “Where did you get that one from?”

‘Oh, I’ve heard enough pickup lines in Sin City to fill a whole book,” she grinned at the swordsman. “And on that note, you remind me of my job. I’m not doing it, but I definitely should be.”

“Are we disturbing something?” Robin asked, standing by the door with Usopp and Franky crowded behind her.

“Come in, Robin-chan,” Sanji put down the bowl jerkily and danced towards the door, guiding Robin towards the table, his voice louder than usual.

The meal was as loud as always, with Luffy stealing food from everyone, and Sanji slapping his hands away when he tried to steal anything from Nami’s or Robin’s plate. He didn’t touch Rage’s plate, maybe because all she got was a soup with meat and vegetables chopped into small pieces.

Usopp was animatedly describing his new project, which she didn’t pay any attention to since it was something about his plants. Nami asked Usopp to upgrade her weapon for storing the talking cloud.

The navigator had her hair pulled into a fluffy ponytail and was wearing a very nice, low-cut sundress that revealed the straps of a bikini top tied around her neck.

"Aren't you creeped out by that cloud?" Rage pointed at the Clima-tact.

"Zeus is not creepy," Nami protested, sending Rage a furious look.

"He's a part of Big Mom's soul; it's like she's still alive through him," Rage frowned at the thought. "Maybe he can enter someone's body, so the person will become possessed by Big Mom's spirit. Imagine waking up one day and starting to mindlessly eat people."

Big Mom eating a person was one of the most hideous things that happened during her time on Onigashima. She could still hear the garbled screams as the Yonko's teeth crunched the bones.

"The only one who gets possessed by mindless hunger is you," Nami retorted.

"You wanna fight, little girl? I'm weak enough for you to land a hit, but I'm still able to whoop your wimpy ass," Rage pointed a finger at the navigator with a challenge.

"How civilised of you, solving everything with brute force. Who needs to worry about Big Mom, when we have you?" Nami's eyes burned with anger, and she wasn't backing down. Rage thought she would storm away after just one comment, but she clearly wasn't that weak. Rage liked that. She let go of her grip on her Conqueror's haki, allowing it to flow freely around her.

"The difference is, I only eat people consensually," she replied with a smirk.

"Yes, that seems to be all you do - fuck and fight," Nami bit back with a disgusted look.

"I prefer to fight first, then fuck," she replied with a wolfish grin.

"How unfortunate for you that you're stuck with us, then," Nami sneered.

Rage snorted and waved her hand dismissively. "Please, you're severely underestimating me."

"Clearly you're not that sick, if your mind's in the gutter," Nami retorted, holding her hand up to stop Sanji's attempt to intervene.

"I mean, that might be Sanji's blood working in my system," she tapped her chest above her heart. "Who knows what could happen if I get more of his perv juice, Nami-swan."

Nami flinched, disgust and disbelief mingled on her face.

"You realise that blood transfusions do not work that way," Chopper interjected, as he poured syrup on his toast. "Blood does not influence your behaviour."

"He's an artificially enhanced human being; anything could happen. Maybe his blood could work miracles and speed up my recovery," she winked at Sanji, whose expression grew cloudy.

"The only instance in which his DNA might affect you is if he got you pregnant, and the foetus's stem cells entered your bloodstream through the placenta," Chopper explained while slicing his toast into small pieces and gesturing with a fork.  "There are documented cases where foetal cells have aided the mother's healing from significant injuries, but that's the best-case scenario. In most cases, these stem cells can cause severe immune reactions in the mother's body, leading to autoimmune diseases."

"And here I thought that falling out vaginas and bad teeth were the worst outcome of pregnancy, aside from actually having a child," Rage pondered with a scowl.

"Pregnancy and childbirth can be very risky for women. There are numerous complications that can occur, such as eclampsia, blood clots, strokes, and haemorrhages. Losing teeth after giving birth might seem like a minor issue in comparison."

"I remember a time when I infiltrated an estate known for breeding and selling slaves. On my second day there, I had to assist a midwife with a birth. It was the girl's fifth child. The labour was going smoothly until she started pushing, and her uterus raptured during a contraction. She bled out in a matter of minutes. The baby died too, so I and the midwife received twenty lashes each for causing the master to lose profit. That girl who died was Mira's older sister. Mira was supposed to take her place in spawning the next generation of slaves."

"You've always been tight-lipped about your crewmates' pasts,” Zoro chimed in with a frown. "Why are you telling this now?"

"Luffy seems to think he's the captain of The Witches,” she stated nonchalantly as she sipped her coffee. "Shouldn't he know what he’s gotten himself into?"

"I don't think I'm their captain, I followed your rules and became their captain," Luffy's firm voice carried through the galley.

A nasty smile crawled on her lips as she caught his gaze. He was staring at her with those wide brown eyes, stubbornness painted all over his face.

"They would never accept a man to rule over them," she replied, her voice firm. "They allowed you to take me, that's all. But thanks to you, I am five crewmates short by now."

Luffy raised an eyebrow. "I told them to stay put in Wano. It's not my fault some of them chose to run away."

"They're dead," Rage snapped.

"You don't know that!" Nami barked, her words full of fury. "Don't try to play your stupid mind games!"

"I'm not playing," Rage replied, maintaining eye contact with Luffy. "Makonde is now in charge, and for the first time, she can act as she sees fit. Before, the rules were clear - no killing teammates. But those rules were established by my mother and then by me. Now, she can act as she wants, under the pretence that leadership has changed, and you haven't established any rules."

"Not killing teammates shouldn't even need to be a rule," Luffy replied with a deep frown. "It's common sense."

Rage shook her head in disappointment. "My team consists of several psychopaths and sociopaths. Most of the team is severely traumatised, and some of them are not mentally stable. Common sense doesn't apply, and rules have to be spelled out clearly. Makonde is probably the most stable person among the team. In her homeland she would've been a queen, but she left with her personal guard to protect her people. She came to Sin City with my grandma and joined the fight with the slave trade."

She remembered when she first laid eyes on Makonde when she set foot in Siny City. The woman had looked glorious, holding her head high with an air of calm composure surrounding her, as if nothing could faze her. Her orange hair was put into a multitude of thin braids and slicked back to cascade down her back. The jewellery around her neck was made of multicoloured beads woven into intricate patterns, and her leather armour was a thing of absolute beauty. The spear she carried glinted in the sunlight, polished and sharpened to perfection.

“Makonde deeply believes that psychopaths should be removed from society, otherwise they would lead us all to our detriment. But she recognized that they are useful during war, because war doesn't affect them as it does other people. Psychopaths have no empathy, therefore they can commit and witness atrocities without being emotionally affected, while others would return traumatised for life. They make great soldiers and spies. However, Makonde thinks that Karla and a few other girls are no longer useful because we allowed them too much freedom, and they are too far gone in their ways. So, by this time, I believe they are dead, either at Makonde's hand or due to Daria's poison."

“Don’t pin this on Luffy!” Nami protested. “You don’t have any proof if they ar actu-”

Luffy slammed his mug on the table, cutting off Nami’s outburst. The galley fell silent, and everyone’s attention focused on the captain. He stared at Rage until a crooked grin spread across his face.

“They would all be dead if you were in charge. It seems I’ve saved your crew’s lives. Five dead is a small loss in comparison. You’re too reckless to be a captain.”

Rage stared, speechless, while Luffy continued to smirk. She blinked, her brain working in slow motion.

“Did you just call me reckless?” she managed to recover her ability to speak.

“Do you have trouble hearing?” he cocked his head to the side.

“You called me reckless? You?” Her brows shot up in disbelief.

“I said what I said,” he laughed.

The adrenaline rushed through her body, making her forget her fatigue. She bolted from her seat, leaped on the table, and aimed a kick at his head.

He pushed back from the table, the legs of his chair screeching across the floor. He avoided her kick while still sitting, and he was grinning like a lunatic.

She jumped, aiming another kick, this time from directly above, but her foot landed on the chair, crushing it into pieces. She spun around, pumping haki into her arm to throw her elbow at Luffy’s face, but he deflected again, jumping onto the table.

“Get the fuck out of my galley!” Sanji roared at the top of his lungs.

“Ah sorry, sorry,” Luffy backflipped towards the door, managing to avoid knocking over any plates on the table.

He seemed to be enjoying himself more than he should have. She was going to make him regret everything he had said. She jumped after him, the plates crunching under her feet.

She slammed into Luffy, and they both fell through the open door.

“Don’t hurt her, Luffy!” Chopper distressed shouts followed them as they tumbled over the railing and fell towards the main deck.

Luffy’s legs coiled around her immobilising her arms, and she was hoisted into the air. He had stretched his arms to grip the main mast, boosting them upward. She struggled to break free from his hold but found herself lacking the strength. She kicked her legs out, trying to generate enough momentum to swing high and catch hold of any part of the rigging. However, Luffy’s legs stretched to wrap all around her, rendering her unable to do anything.

“Come on,” Luffy called to her. “You’re supposed to take it easy.”

She shot him a furious glare. As a last resort, she channelled all her anger into a burst of Conqueror’s haki, hoping to stun him for even a brief moment, allowing her to escape his grip.

The world spun around her, and she lost all sense of direction. Her vision blurred, and pressure built inside her head until something wet trickled from her nose. She closed her eyes, attempting to block the unpleasant sensation, but the vertigo persisted. Suddenly, her body went limp, drained of all energy. Her head slumped to the side, and more wetness streamed from her nose, dripping down her chin. She could smell blood.

“Hey, Chopper, I think she fainted!” That was Luffy’s voice.

“Why can’t you just get along!” the doctor sounded distressed.

The scent of grass mingled with the smell of blood, and she felt her body being gently placed on a flat surface.

"She won't get better if you keep fighting every day!" A blurry image of Chopper appeared above her. "She's awake. Rage, you have a massive nosebleed; we'll need to give you another blood transfusion. Can you hear me, Rage?"

She could hear him, but the words didn’t mean much, and she lacked the energy to reply. Things happened around her while she floated on the edge of reality.

Strong arms lifted her from the ground, and she was carried away, enveloped in the familiar scent of Luffy. It was a nice scent, she wanted that scent all over her. The desire to claim him surged to the surface from the deep place inside her where she shoved all her yearning for her third mate. She craved to see that bright smile every day for the rest of her life.

“Put her on the cot,” Chopper's voice interrupted her swirling thoughts, and annoyance flickered within her. All she wanted was to drift away into her dreams, where all her mates were with her. She wanted to see Law, she missed him so much.

“Sanji, could you lie down beside her? I’m sorry to ask for your blood again, but this is an emergency.”

The scent of cologne and cigarettes displaced the scent of her mate, and she wasn't happy about it.

“This wouldn’t have happened if not for you, shitty rubber boy,” Sanji sounded angry. “You trashed my galley, dipshit. You'd better go help Marimo clean up, or you won't get any more food today."

“That wasn’t my fault,” Luffy sulked. “She blows up at me no matter what-”

A loud slap echoed through the room.

“Cut this fucking crap,” it was Nami, beautiful and brilliant Nami, who looked so hot when she was angry. “You’re acting like an idiot around her, provoking her every chance you get. Don’t even try to play dumb, I know you do it on purpose.”

“That hurt, Nami. Why are you so mean?”

Another slap, followed by a yelp of pain.

“Look at her! She’s already one leg in her grave! Did you bring her on the ship just to watch her die?”

“Of course not, I made a promise!”

“Well you’re fucking it all up. Picking fights with her won’t make her fall for you, you’re only making things worse!”

“She’ll come around.”

“Luffy,” Sanji’s grave voice interrupted the bickering. “Listen to Nami. You can’t win Rage over with a fight. You don’t have to fight for every single thing in your life.”

The infirmary was enveloped in a heavy silence, interrupted only by the slow beeping of the heart monitor. Its rhythmic sound was strangely soothing, luring her toward the peaceful dreams of her mates.

“You said it wasn’t fair for me to hate her for what was done to me in the past,” Nami’s voice chased away the visions of her perfect life.

A prick of pain in the crook of her elbow was followed by a surge of foreign hormones entering her bloodstream. Her body swiftly assimilated these unfamiliar hormones, fueling the healing process.

“Maybe you should take your own advice and stop projecting your own trauma onto Rage."

"I don't do that!" Luffy sounded defensive.

"You never talk about your family or your childhood. All we know about you is what your brothers told us, and we’ve only met your grandpa once. You never met your dad, while Rage had many fathers, including the man who you idolise. Shanks never took you aboard, while Rage was born on his ship. She had a mom, grandma and a great grandma to take care of her. We don't even know if you know your mom. Rage grew up rich in a bustling city, while you had to fend for yourself in a forest and a garbage dump. She has a home she can return to, a family, and friends who would welcome her back with open arms. She rejected it all, while your dream is to create a family of your own. You have us, Luffy, we are your family. But all she seems to have for us is disdain. I'm sure it rubs you the wrong way, that the woman who had everything you didn't rejects the one good thing you managed to create for yourself."

A weak chuckle bubbled up inside her. She managed to crack open her eyes and fix her gaze on Luffy. He was staring at her with a displeased frown. Silly boy, they could've been bonded long ago if he wasn't such an idiot.

She decided she would tease him to his wits end before she claimed him. Her lips stretched in a content smile as her eyelids dropped. Finally, sleepiness came to claim her, and she welcomed it with relief. The last thing that she registered was the door slamming shut.

[bobwess]

AMA (Down to Agincourt addition) I am once again bored, so here are some more (aka many) questions. As that anon from last year who asked for the elevator pitch, I am so glad I did and gave DtA another shot!!! When did you first start reading it?

When did you first realize how hooked you where with DtA? Was it from moment one? Was there a spesific scene?

Fav of the original side characters?

Fav the original main characters?

Coolest concept that DtA introduced into the SPN world?

If there could be a in-depth prequel written for any of the characters, who's past would you be the most interested in exploring?

If you had to, what would you ranking be of the books?

How many times have you read it all the way through?

What bit of foreshadowing (if any) did you miss the first time around that really jumped out at you on a reread?

Did reading DtA help inspire your own The End fic?

What of the many burning questions currently unanswered do you want answered first?

What's the most interesting non-SPN related fact that DtA taught you?

If normal SPN team free will read/watch/found out about the DtA what do you think their reactions would be?

What's a scene/interaction that still scratches the brain itch?

Have you read The Forever King spin-off series? If so, what are your thoughts?

Yes!! Muahahahaha. Changing the order a bit.

Coolest concept that DtA introduced into the SPN world?

The Winchester House, everything about it, and its entire relationship to Nate. 

The complex rules and magical constraints/potential of metaphysical contamination.

Honorable mention: Lucifer’s plans with the Gods.

But also actually: The Winchester House.

What bit of foreshadowing (if any) did you miss the first time around that really jumped out at you on a reread?

(spoilers) 

The set up for the church paradox. 

Cas, post fall, fever dream, almost dying locked in that cabin bedroom, the unnamed goddess calling him in spirit yet somehow physically into that Church.

Dean, post infection, fever dream, almost dying locked in that cabin bedroom, Cas accidentally calling him in spirit yet somehow physically into that Church. 

All of time and space converging. Dean is the impossible, he was never supposed to be in this universe, Cas accidentally binding them together with those sigils, allowing Cas to connect with Dean in the first place, and also making Dean invisible to Lucifer while he’s physically in that cabin, which he technically is, thus allowing him to shield Lia and thus her able to get him into that church where he and Cas manage to do something and erase the kids' (and both of their) minds. 

There is so much meat there, and every time you re-read there is more. There is so much cool foreshadowing with ALL the players involved, and I literally put together another thread in that during EVERY read-through. 

Someone once asked me my thoughts on what we know happened in the church and it got to 19 pages in google before I had to cut it off pending another re-read of book 4. 

Fav of the original side characters?

I can not separate Nate and the Winchester House, so--

Fav the original main characters?

Vera by a slim margin over Joe.

When did you first start reading it?

It’s hard to remember just because the last three years are a fuzzy mess, but I’m pretty sure I started reading it late 2021/early 2022. I am a fast reader so I demolished it VERY fast. 

When did you first realize how hooked you where with DtA? Was it from moment one? Was there a specific scene? 

After Cas and Dean started properly working together in book 1 I was pretty on board, but once they told Chuck and started their trips into Kansas City, that was when it really settled in and I knew I was about to read the entire thing.

If there could be a in-depth prequel written for any of the characters, who's past would you be the most interested in exploring?

Joe or Teresa. Honestly though I’d really like to see the case Dean worked down by the border. 

If you had to, what would you ranking be of the books?

This is a slim AF margin too, because they’re all so good. But I think it’d be 3,1,4,2 So “A Thousand Lights in Space” “Map of the World” “Game of God” “It’s the Stars That Lie” But it's real neck and neck for the last three.

How many times have you read it all the way through?

Books one and two I have read cover to cover 6 or 7 times, three I probably read a couple more. Book four I’ve actually only read completely cover to cover once, but I have read a lot of it out of order a couple more times. I’m trying to get my fics to a bit more of a stable point so I can re-read it again in case I go off the rails hyper-fixation on it again. I’ll probably read it twice in a row when I read it this next time.

Did reading DtA help inspire your own The End fic?

No, it hindered it greatly. The world building in DtA is very contrary to the plot I have for my endverse fic, and it took a while for my brain to reset and be like “Nope, this is what I’m doing, put that out of your mind.” If I hadn’t read DtA, you’d already have my Endverse fic, because I started writing it before reading that, and had to stop work for straight up like a year. 

What of the many burning questions currently unanswered do you want answered first?

WHAT EXACTLY HAPPENED INSIDE THE DAMN CHURCH!?!?!?

What's the most interesting non-SPN related fact that DtA taught you?

Graphene and everything about it.

If normal SPN team free will read/watch/found out about the DtA what do you think their reactions would be?

I think none of them would have any idea what to do with it. Cas would therefore not have much outward expression, Sam would be incredibly awkward and only a little insulted he isn’t in it, and Dean would be 10/10 defensive AF. 

What's a scene/interaction that still scratches the brain itch?

The Winchester Hou- Cas accidentally calling Dean when he’s using Allison as a conduit for the kids in Ichabod, and subsequently their interactions after Cas figures out what happened. 

Close seconds are Cas and Dean’s interaction after Dean gets bit in the courtyard, Cas searching Kansas City with his mind after Dean touched The Ick™. 

And yes actually the retelling of Nate’s interactions with The Winchester House.

Have you read The Forever King spin-off series? If so, what are your thoughts?

I have not read it yet, I must at some point. I know I’ll like it.

-

Also I'm glad my pitch worked and you ended up giving it another go!!

[justaboot]

18 for the violence ask game

18 - it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

OKAY ALSO IN HONOR OF YOU LIKE? Klondike everything???

Maybe this is me, but I grew up in a city made from like, THEE biggest gold rush in North American history, so as a kid I DEEPLY hyperfixated on gold rushes and there's SO MUCH FUN STUFF TO PLAY WITH FANDOM-WISE.

YALL. THE KLONDIKE GOLD RUSH WAS SO INTERESTING AND COMPLICATED. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD A PERSON HAD TO WORK TO GET THERE?

33 miles of BRUTAL trail, lugging a LITERAL METRIC TON OF SUPPLIES. LIKE. THEY LITERALLY DIDN'T LET YOU INTO CANADA IF YOU WEREN'T CARRYING A METRIC TON. So a journey people thought would take days took MONTHS, because you had to go one load at time, put it down after a few miles, and go back for the next load.

And the last stretch before hitting the Canadian border? THE GOLDEN STAIRCASE

BRUTAL 45 DEGREE ANGLE CLIMB. GET FUCKED.

Finish lugging your stuff up the top? Congrats, pay duties on your METRIC TON OF SHIT YOU HAULED, and then CUT AND STRIP LOGS TO BUILD A BOAT AND RAFT DAYS TO DAWSON, AS WINTER CLOSED IN AND ICE FILLED THE RIVER.

Goldie got to Dawson before Scrooge, who hiked the trail. Assuming Scrooge hit the road as soon as possible, unless you were very wealthy, this (and other much worse paths) was the only real way at the time. Women hiked it too, in short skirts with leather leggings underneath, or in mens' trousers.

Anyway, Goldie hiked the Chilkoot Pass. I've decided.

And once you got there? GOD there's so much cool history.

GOLDIE WAS A DANCE HALL GIRL.

Once the shows were done, they'd push all the chairs aside and the men would pay to dance with the women, waltzes and square dances and such. Of COURSE Scrooge would look down on that! It's not just a waste of money to pay to see a show, but to pay for a dance! Come on! He does go in when he strikes it rich, so like...

Idk, I've got a fic brewing in my docs somewhere of Scrooge and Goldie having to go to a miner's meeting, which was a little unofficial court held by the miners to deal with petty issues, (you wanted to go for other people, so they'd be there for you), and all the men get jumpscared by Glittering Goldie showing up next to the Scottish Reclusive Asshole, filthy and wearing his pants. Someday that'll happen.

ANYWAY I JUST REALLY LIKE DAWSON'S HISTORY ITS AND KLONDIKE SCROLDIE COULD BE SO MUCH MORE THAN A CABIN IN THE MOUNTAINS.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk.

[alpaca-clouds]

When White (or allistic?) people travel...

I am gonna travel a bit next week. Well, "a bit" really means: I am gonna dip across the border for a few days into the Netherlands (I am living really close to the border) and bike around a bit. At least as long as the weather is gonna play along.

But it has reminded me of this one thing I always saw when I was traveling.

And I am to this day not entirely sure whether it is a white people thing or an allistic people thing. And that is this need to travel often into a fantasy land.

Now, there are those people who will travel to some hotel ressort and hang at the beach for ten days. Which is valid. Laziness is a myth. All power to you. Just consider to maybe not do it on indigenous land. (No, really. The gif is there for a reason. Do not travel to Hawai'i.)

But there is this other kind of travel happening too. The travel, where you wanna see this other country - but not as it really is, but this idealized fantasy version of it.

I most often saw this in relation with Japan. Because let's face it. A ton of people, who are into Japan, are into Japan because of anime and the stuff they have "learned" through anime, with maybe some Japanese self-mythology put into it when it comes to stuff like honor and samurai and what not. And then they travel to Japan and are very, very disappointed, because the Japan they arrive in is not anime!Japan, but just another place. Another speck of earth so to speak. Where just normal people live, not anime characters. Sure, there are cool shrines and temples to visit. But all in all it is just a place like any other. It is not fantasy.

But it is a thing I have seen with a lot of white people travelling. They do not want to visit a place but the fantasy version of that place. Like, with Hawai'i they wanna go palm beach, hula dancing, aloha and what not. They do not wanna go to a place where the indigenous population is exploitated and gets further and further pushed from their land. If they go to South Africa, they wanna go to this trendy place, watch some whales and what not, not see the rampant poverty and crime. Or when they go visit Greece, they wanna see that country with those nice ruins and stuff, eat some good food, and once again not be confronted with the poverty.

I still remember when I was a teenager and got send onto this Christian youth trip to Corfu, Greece. Now, it was knda funny, because it was a Christian youth trip - but our hostel was right next to the local brothel. But the pimp was actually a super nice guy, just so you know. Like, I got bullied on that trip by some of the other teens and at one time he just threatened those bullies to set his dog onto them, before inviting me and my friends over for dinner.

Now, the entire trip was two weeks and every day there was the option to go somewhere. Either to the beach or to see some sights. I did not go along. Partly because of the bullying, partly because I never got the idea of "seeing the sights". Instead I made friends with some local kids and hung out with them. At times I went with them on some trips they did with their families... And the irony is: I have seen much more of that island than anyone else on that trip. Just not... the ruins and stuff, that everyone else wanted to see. But I saw a farm where I got to taste some fresh honey, got a street dog to the vet, somehow ended up on a small fishing boat, was at a party where a kid got babtized, and visited a couple of villages that usually tourists just drive through. I learned a lot about the place and how the people live there.

And I do realize that it is not feasable for everyone from that group of 60 teens to just do that. I get that. But I also have to wonder... What is the value to visit the same ruin that has already been photographed like 2 million times?

Again, I get hanging at the beach. I do. But... looking at stuff that I can look at online? Yeah, no.

I guess what my rambling is aiming at...

Tourism kinda sucks. And even the entire idea, that it somehow helps the communities just does not really match the reality. Because the truth is that the money generated through communism mostly gets gobbled up by big companies, while the tourism at the touristy places also makes everything more expensive for the people who actually live their.

And tourists just do not want to see the people actually living there. They are not interested in the real place. Just in a fantasy. A fantasy that the tourism sector tries to uphold.

But it is... not really good, is it?

Like, hundreds of people or even thousands visiting either ruins or cultural heritage sites is not actually a good thing. It harms the environment and everything. And in the end it also hurts the people actually living around it. And they kinda have more of a right to be there than any tourist.

We really need to rethink how we travel and how we vacation. Because this isn't it.

[fountainpenguin]

"Now, shoulders back- and stand up tall! And do not walk, but try to float!" (x)

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New 130 Reasons Why I’m Fairy Trash update today!

Fairly OddParents || One-Shot - “I Just Live Here”

Read on FFN || Read on AO3

Find more Lavender Train story arc HERE

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It's spring break for the Spellementary School kids. Poof, Finley, and Foop visit their extended family for the holidays- Poof with Granddad Dusty ("Big Daddy") and all his Fairywinkle cousins, Foop with his grandmother, and Finley with...

... Well. I guess H.P.'s just putting him to work. That's Pixie life for ya.

(First 1,000 words under the cut)

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By the way... FFN keeps saying that it won't send me more emails because apparently my email is rejecting them and no matter how many fixes I attempt, it's not sticking.

If you would like to leave a review, I'd prefer you leave it on AO3 because I'm confident I'll get an email that I can respond to, but you can still leave reviews on the FFN story if you wish!

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125. I Just Live Here (Immediate sequel to "Scarred")

Wednesday May 6th, 2005

Year of Sky, Spring of the Silent Owls

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Poof Fairywinkle-Cosma

Chingaling-chime!

"Now approaching Starglint Town. Please prepare to disembark in the next five minutes. If you've enjoyed your local public transportation system, consider supporting returning candidate Mortikor Fern as Pink Robe in the next Fairy Council election. Thank you for flying with Rainbow Transit Services and have a magical day."

I've heard that message (with different drop-off points subbed in) so many times in the past four hours, I kind of wanna barf. And even if I did, I could probably recite it several times myself on the way to the nearest clinic. I'll be glad when this bus ride is over. I feel like it's been four weeks since I left the Spellementary dorms.

There's a good reason as to why it's taken so long. Starglint Town lies at the edge of the Fairy World Outskirts, basically kissing the border with Anti-Fairy World… separated from it only by Emper: a scraggly little town on the floating island that's just come into view up ahead. Emper isn't much to look like. There's a park with cool statues from the old days, plus a cute grocery store where they hand out free sugar cookies to kids. My dad takes me to get one every time we visit Mama Cosma, but there isn't much else that's interesting. Starglint Town is where all the action is, from libraries to community centers to toy stores and pizza shops.

Granddad Dusty's property is smack between the two. Everyone in Emper calls him Big Daddy and they treat him with so much respect, I always wonder if my family are under some kind of secret government protection just because our counterparts rule Anti-Fairy World. I mean, it doesn't sound too far-fetched when you think about it for a while. I know a lot of people dislike the Anti-Fairywinkles, but I hope most of them realize that if we knocked them out of power, it wouldn't be the end of that kind of leadership in Anti-Fairy World. Someone else would just rise up to take over, and they could be even worse than Anti-Cosmo is now.

I don't even think Anti-Cosmo is that bad, but if I say that, people will freak out at me and shower me in questions about whether or not I remember getting kidnapped as a newborn. I don't, but… that doesn't mean I want to hear about it over and over again. I wish more people would respect my boundaries and ask me first before they talk about it… Not just dump the whole kidnapping thing on my head any time I want to have a polite and reasonable conversation about Fairy World history, geography, or politics.

Maybe instead of screaming about how H.P. and Anti-Cosmo are evil fiends who went off the deep end and can never be forgiven because they kidnapped a baby and tried to springboard off my magic to rule the universe, we could, I dunno… ask ourselves why the current state of the universe isn't working for them? There's gotta be some reason they feel like they're doing the right thing for their people by pushing back against the Fairies. They're still people, right?

Or if you want to look at this from another angle, why do Anti-Fairy World and Pixie World even have corrupt leaders in the first place? Do people support them? If they don't, then why don't their people support Fairy World? Are we the crueler of two evils in their eyes? We should change that. We should figure out how to fix it.

And if Pixies and Anti-Fairies do support their leaders, maybe we should ask ourselves why. Are they being brainwashed by hateful propaganda? My school's always teaching us that Anti-Fairies are behind all that's bad in the universe, so we're using propaganda too.

Do Pixies and Anti-Fairies support their leaders because they care about their people, use their taxes wisely, and keep everyone fed, sheltered, and clothed? That sounds okay to me. Next topic: Why aren't Anti-Cosmo and Foop's dad in jail for all those other times they tried to take over Fairy World? If the answer to that is "their worlds will fall apart if they don't stay in power, plunging the universe into chaos," then maybe they're actually great leaders and aren't so bad after all.

Just a thought. Politics are probably more complicated than I think they are, but that's just me.

I've never worried about repeat kidnapping when I'm at home with my parents, apart from maybe one time that Timmy's Dad snuck into his room and stole our fishbowl for Mr. Crocker. At school, I feel safe in the hands of the faculty and their magical wards. Yeah, Mr. Crocker might be my teacher now and he really is as wacky and distractible as Timmy always said he was, but he's not allowed within twenty feet of our dorms.

My classmates don't always respect our cohort's RA, but I'm pretty sure Gary would mess Crocker the freak up if he ever tried peering through our windows. Gary and Crocker are both witches, but Gary's 1.56% genie with minor reality-bending powers to prove it, while Crocker's about thirteen generations down from his magical ancestor with nothing to show for it but the ability to float. I know who I'd bet money on in that fight.

Foop and I tried sneaking out one time when it was late and we wanted fruit snacks from the vending machine, and that's how I found out that Gary can just snap his fingers and summon clones of himself. I don't leave my room after curfew anymore.

[Cnt'd on FFN / AO3 - Links at top]

[delphiniumarchangelmoon]

My brain is cooking up an absolute MOBSTER if a totk sequel idea

Pile of rant below the cut but the basically concept I think y’all will enjoy is that

post-totk Hyrule is going through a political rough patch about 15-20 years in the future, no one really knows what’s going to happen and the kingdom of Hyrule itself is shrunk down to really just central Hyrule down into the southeast to Lurelin. The individual races each have their own defined nations now and depending on political relations if can be easy or difficult to travel between them

(For example the Zora Kingdom and Hyrule are so close they’re practically merging due to how close the royals are, but no one’s been able to get into or out of Gerudo desert for YEARS)

And you play the game three times as three separate characters, each only having access to part of the map and only one side of the story, only to unlock a secret fourth storyline at the end that fully explains the plot.

Now onto the huge daydream universe I’ve been thinking up for a week

The crux of this story is a couple points:

1. Link entrusted each of his zonai abilities to young npc’s in the game. I haven’t exactly worked out what’s going to who yet but I know a few.

2. The Gerudo population began to see radical reactionary politics after the Demon King fiasco, with many desiring even stricter anti-man measures. Riju vehemently opposed these politics which created lots of tension, and decided to attempt to smooth things over by having an important Hylian political figure act as a sworn donee for her and her wife’s baby. It was Link. Like fathers Riju’s baby. Trust the process it’s gonna be cool.

The character who gets the Ultrahand ability straight away is Mattison, though she isn’t a playable character.

She keeps the ability a secret and learns to use it in hidden places with help from Riju. They become inseparable and Mattison wants nothing more than to protect her Chief and save their people from further isolating themselves.

Things gone to a head when Purah telraveks to the desert to give Riju an exam using new tech she just invented—essentially an ultrasound, and finds something… peculiar.

The baby might be a… male.

They do their best to keep quiet about it but Riju and up fighting with her wife over what to do about it. The wife insists that the child will only bring destruction and evil, as the Gerudo kinds of the ancient past. Riju insists that it is her duty as a mother to try regardless and if the child is truly doomed, she will save them from that fate herself.

But word soon gets out and an assasinqtion plot is put in place to rid them of Riju and the baby.

Meanwhile Mattison has been encountering a strange person out in the desert while she tests her vehicles in secret at night. A person covered head-to-tie in dark clothing riding a different zonai vehicle. They race each other night after night and eventually gain enough trust to speak with each other.

Mattison learns this person’s name is Coda and they are an engineer working with Zonai tech to make vehicles and musical instruments.

Their friendship grows and eventually when Mattison learns of the assasinqtion plot, she confides to Coda and asks for help getting Riju and the baby to safety.

They end up making a big flying machine and airlift Riju from a battle in the town square up to the Great Sky Island.

And that’s all you get to know about that at first.

Meanwhile Zelda and Link have kids of their own, a set of twins that legally carry their parents names as you’d expect, but go by nicknames to avoid any… negative attention for their lineage.

Free—the new Link—ends up spending most of his childhood in Rito Village after showing a liking for archery, areal combat, and climbing.

Free’s story begins when a diplomatic meeting is called between the Rito and the Gerudo at the border of their territory. Free accompanies an aging Teba and his apprentice Tulin along with some warriors to the meeting, where the illegitimate chief Malkena demands the Rito shrink their borders further despite already having the smallest territory in Hyrule. Teba obviously disagrees and a fight breaks out, Malkena killing Teba in the process. They are pushed back and the new elder Tulin asks Free to go to Lookout Landing and seek help from Purah. It is there he learns that his father Link hasn’t been seen in almost five years, but no one could get word to the Rito for various reasons.

Meanwhile his sister “Faith” is our second lead—YES, a playable Zelda!— stays in Tarrey Town helping run Link’s new business “Cafe on the hill” a small bakery and eatery run out of their sprawling mansion overlooking the town (which is more of a giant fortress city now)

She shows a propensity for magic, like her mother but more controlled and concentrated. She loves exploring and foraging in the hills of Hyrule and is very good at navigating on her own. When her father goes missing she is quick to want to look for him but the older population in the town assures her that he’s always been a wanderer. She waits and waits but he doesn’t come home. Faith then decides to seek consul from an eccentric old man who runs a monster museum who claims to have been a good friend of Link’s. The man (who we all know is Kilton) tells Faith to travel to Satori Mountain and pray at the tree, and she will find a guide there. And that’s where her story begins.

The third playable character is known as “Rise” or “Sunrise”, Riju’s son and the other’s half brother. Also a reincarnation of Ganon, though his storyline revolves around finding a way to stop himself from being overtaken by evil.

His mother insists that he needs to either find his father or his siblings, but he’ll likely have a hard time doing either as the royal family became secretive recluses after the Upheaval, and attempting to find thrm would likely warrant violence. She then recommends seeking out Zelda if anyone, as her whereabouts were likely the save as when Riju had last seen her: Hateno. So then in disguise Rise sets out to find Zelda who promises to assist him in fighting off the evil inside him, but he wound likely need to journey to find specific people and objects imbued with powerful magic.

And I have no idea where this all goes but after you defeat all three storylines a secret fourth story starts with a cutscene in the Depths (which only played a minor role in the first three, lots more time is spent in the sky and in lands just beyond Hyrule’s original borders)

A cloaked figure is seen kneeling at the foot of a small monument, it looks like a grave, with flowers in front of them.

A second figure, which is recognized pretty quickly as a younger Coda (who was seen frequently assisting the others in their own stories) in what looks like a modified Yoga outfit.

They call out “who are you and what are you doing at my father’s grave?”

The figure turns and stands, revealing an older, depressed looking Link. He holds out his hand and a purple ball appears in it. Coda takes it and is granted to Autobuild ability.

As it turns out Coda is also a twin, the twin children of Kohga. Their brother Kash is a staunch traditionalist and wants to run the clan just like hybrid father did. Coda on the other hand sees that this is a fruitless endeavor and wants to help the world, not harm it.

In their exploration of the depths Coda finds an ancient monument claiming to tell the story of his the endless cycle started, and how it can only end the exact way it began.

It also indicated that what remained of the gloom was coming from a specific source, though what it was is anyone’s guess. So Vida begins to build and research, eventually meeting the cast and helping them along.

However in the final battle of the fourth route the master sword shatters.

It is revealed at the end that the source of the power for evil was a tomb hidden in the depths, which all 4 character have heard calling out countless times.

The evil beast thing raises its head once more and they tear open the coffin to find a large sword.

Coda takes the sword and plunges it into the demon, which destroys it and in its wake the sword shimmers and shifts into the form of an unconscious man.

Everything fades to black, credits roll.

And there’s so much I didn’t even have a good spot to put in—like a certain Zora sneaking into Pyrah’s laboratory to de-age her best friend so he won’t die a million years before her

Or the fact that certain monsters gained (or re-gained) sentience after the Gloom retreated to the depths and now there’s entire Lynel and ‘Blin societies and the conflict between the ones who want to work with the Hylians and the ones who still want war is a huge plot point

Or that at one point I turn Koltin’s entire existence into a Chekhov’s gun and allow Faith to commune with nature spirits and call upon his protection to OBLITERATE a massive pile of enemies

[rodolfoparras]

My dad's birthday is today, so yesterday to celebrate, he took some of us on a hike to a really gorgeous spot by the US/Canada border (it was a 7+ hour round trip)

It was so worth it, despite being unable to walk today 😞😭

But my sister was so annoying 🧍‍♂️ I am not going on another hike with her because oh my god.

My parents wanted to stay till dark to see the sunset and stars (we were told this before hand) and she got pissed off because of the heights and it was cold (she's scared of heights and only wore shorts. To this hike.) and my parents were like fine, whatever. We'll start leaving, just hold on 2 seconds while we take a few more pictures.

She ended up storming off BY HERSELF, to do a 20+ minute uphill hike in the dark. (She's 17) And told no one. I was told to follow and had to haul ass (I'm asthmatic:)) so I had to stop 3 times and she kept going without me 🧍‍♂️

But other than that, I got to collect some cool rocks and shells by a nearby beach, and the view was OUTRAGEOUS. Please look up Cape Flattery, it's sooo gorgeous. The view was so so worth it. We saw seals and sea otters and some massive cargo ships. There's a little island with a lighthouse and how do I yearn to be a keeper 😞 mad jealous

Anyways, sorry for bitching 🏃‍♂️💨 but all in all it was great. Had a nice time, though my legs feel absolutely dead ( I cannot move them without them hurting😭)

-🐧

This is really the sibling experience summed up in one ask😭 on one hand I understand your sister bc when I get overstimulated or put in situations I’m uncomfortable with, I need to get out or away from it immediately and ppl in my surroundings do tend to be negatively affected bc of that and yes she should’ve worn proper pants or handled the situation in a better way but sometimes this is how we deal with things but on the other hand I don’t think it’s fair that you had to chase her down when it is a taxing task for you if anything I think your parent/parents should’ve been the one to do that😭

Also I just googled it and Jesus Christ that looks so beautiful!! I can understand why your parents wanted to visit! Side note the mentions of otters reminded me of a tiktok about them and what cruel animals they are they rape and eat carcasses and they hold their kids hostage so they can steal the food that the mother had been collecting for their kid 😭

[ironmandeficiency]

pedro boys as high school teachers (modern au)

boys included: javi p, pero, jack, frankie, din, javi g, dieter, oberyn, marcus p, marcus m

word count: 1161

summary: there are just my thoughts on what high school subjects some of the pedro boys would teach, modern au

a/n: decided to reread the agm universe by @forever-rogue & it gave me an idea so here we are. i’m sorry if the formatting is jank, i’ve been posting from mobile for like two months now. also i know the ms. frizzle gif isn’t quite relevant enough but you can fight me

javier peña — javi is peak history teacher material. his students are juniors & seniors because he doesn’t have the patience for lower class bullshit. his philosophy is that students take his class seriously or not at all. took up coaching girls basketball one year because the last coach quit on short notice & admin begged him to take the spot; the year he coached was the first time in 30 years that their team went to state. became best friends with pero through their respective subjects & will have drinks together on weekends. doesn’t give grades that end with nines & will bump them up a point (69 to 70, 89 to 90, etc.) to not be a dick.

pero — geography. scares students stiff but does have a soft spot for those who put effort into his class. offers bonus points on tests for those who go to the local ren fair, and students are surprised to see their teacher wearing full garb & fighting in duels. his classroom is across from javi p’s & they watch each other’s classes when needed. they have the same lunch & conference, so when there’s nothing to do they like to talk shit about anything and everything. they gossip like old women & playfully bicker like old men. pero is often called “the gordon ramsay of teachers” & framed a photoshopped picture of their faces on the other’s body sent to him by a student.

jack daniels — football coach & ffa. he has and will continue to drive things to work that aren’t regular vehicles (tractors, horses, golf carts, even a donkey once). freshmen are surprised to see that he actually does own a highway legal means of transportation. all the ffa animals are kept in a separate barn on his ranch not even three miles from the school & will let students ride in the bed of his truck or on his trailer on the way there & back for class (parents do sign permission slips for it). lets students control the aux cord on these trips as long as it doesn’t have curse words, but the way to his heart is if someone plays reba. hosts the yearly chili cookoff to support the ffa, and it’s always a hit. he buys a stetson for each class that the students sign at the end of the school year & hangs them all up around the ffa barn.

frankie morales — softball coach that also teaches algebra 1 & 2. he has such a math brain & is super lenient when it comes to the students that have a harder time grasping the subject. very passionate about coaching & does not tolerate any bullying within the team, on the field or off it. wants to set a coaching standard for when his daughter starts playing; he wants her to know how a coach should treat their team early on. she comes to after school practices & all the girls love her to bits. frankie lets her in the dugout during games to motivate them. offers snacks for kids who come to tutorials because he knows they are hungry by the end of the day no matter when they had lunch, and that full bellies equal full attention.

din djarin — chemistry & physics. is very intimidating until it’s a couple months into the year & his students are finally comfortable asking him personal questions. they accidentally see a picture of him and his son on his computer’s desktop one day & just like that, he’s no longer piss-your-pants intimidating. he can be stern when he needs to be, but overall would rather not. he makes these two difficult subjects much easier to learn & will have so many cool lab demonstrations (some are mythbusters level) that occasionally border on dangerous. gets along with coworkers by not getting involved in drama & doing his job, doesn't have time for the bs.

javier gutierrez — this man definitely has a flair for the dramatic & would be an amazing theater director, albeit a bit dreamy. would recruit the art teacher from across the hall that he knew had acting experience to help in one production & suddenly, they’re co-directors. students favored him highly whether they took theater or not; something about him just oozed kindness & compassion, and the kids trusted him. insists the students either call him mr. g or javi, he feels that the standard honorifics are too stifling. him & dieter will buy their students fast food after days spent making set pieces & rehearsals in the auditorium. the queer kids feel hella safe with him & actually have a kinda-joke ship going with him and dieter that neither men are upset over.

dieter bravo — art teacher turned surprise theater co-director. always shows up looking like a hot mess because that’s just who he is. very lax and chill with students but will be the first to call out bullshit if it walks thru his door. drinks several coffees a day & despite the vast number of almost-pajamas he wears, some doubt whether he even sleeps at all. is the one who reigns in his counterpart when things go awry. recruits his best students to help make set pieces for theater & bribes them with free food bc he knows the way to win kids over. plays it off when students talk about the (b)romance between him & javi g but is actually pretty flattered.

oberyn martell — this is the english teacher that the lgbt+ kids flock to immediately. between him & javi g, they have an even split of the school’s queer kids idolizing them. also coaches the cross country team where usually two (or more) of his daughters participate yearly. is able to separate coaching from his fatherly duties so he doesn’t turn into a coachzilla (he’s heard about the dads who go batshit when coaching their kids in sports & loathes them). will team w javi on assignments with historical emphasis (mostly essays and book reports) & will allow students to write one essay that covers both assignments to keep from overworking the kids. is considered a jack of all trades when it comes to different subjects, and is highly recommended when another subject has a sub & cannot teach the lesson properly.

marcus pike — is the most patient & not-confrontational teacher ever. he’s the one that doesn’t get angry, he just gets disappointed & that’s actually much worse. started the school’s photography club as a volunteer & was eventually able to get the funding to make it a class, so they hired him to teach it. his students find out he plays bass in a cover band & they flip their shit abt wanting to see him perform. during the nature photography lessons, he brings his dog to work to be the model. jack gets wind of it & encourages him to use the ffa animals too, and uses the student-taken photos on the school website.

marcus moreno — not a teacher but is head of the pta. he chaperones field trips & school dances, and fights the school board to get better resources for the whole district. (i just love him okay?)