#I’M SUPER GRATEFUL. Like. You have no idea
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You Were Never Mine to Lose (Chapter 26)
Synopsis: The storm rages outside. Inside, glances linger, silence hums, and touch becomes its own kind of confession.
Word count: 5.4K
Warnings: 18+ MDNI, Mentions of alcohol consumption, Sexual tension, Mild language
A/N: Hey guysss😭 I’m so sorry for disappearing for a whole month! Things just got super busy with school, and I couldn’t update as soon as I wanted to. We just finished our 2nd semester (finally!), and in about a week we’ll start enrollment for summer classes. My school is on a trimestral schedule so yes, it gets really expensive and exhausting🤧💸
But while I have these two weeks of break, I’ll do my best to keep writing and giving you new chapters as often as I can💜
So here it is, Chapter 26. I really hope it was worth the wait. Enjoy!!🥰


After your bodies have cooled off from the heat of everything, you both climb into the bathtub, water still warm, steam lingering like a secret. You wash each other off slowly—tender hands, lazy kisses—and when you're finally done, you get out together. Towels drape around your bodies like makeshift robes, and you rummage through your bag to offer her something to wear. She ends up in one of your fitted shirts—it hugs her a little too well—and pajama bottoms that sit just right on her hips. You throw on a loose shirt and shorts. Casual. Comfortable. Dangerous.
Back in bed, you crawl beneath the sheets and she follows, curling up behind you without a word. Her arm wraps around your waist, her fingers gently brushing your stomach. You feel her exhale against your neck, her breath soft and steady. It’s stupid how warm and right it feels.
And then—KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK.
You both flinch.
It starts as a knock. Then louder. Then banging.
“What the fuck,” Agatha mutters, voice gravelly and irritated, still half-asleep. “Who the hell—”
You groan, burying your face in the pillow. “Ignore it. It's probably a prank. It’ll go away.”
It doesn’t.
Then comes a voice—muffled, but urgent. Familiar.
“Y/N! Y/N, open up! It’s Billy—it’s an emergency!”
Your eyes shoot open. Your stomach drops. Agatha sits up, eyes wide, hair tousled, lips parted in disbelief. “Shit,” she says.
Panic sets in.
You leap out of bed, heart pounding. “Bathroom. Hide. Now.”
Agatha doesn’t even argue—she grabs her clothes off the floor and rushes into the bathroom. You hear the door shut just as you reach your front door, trying to steady your breathing, trying to look like you didn’t just have sex with the Governor of Washington.
You open the door.
Billy’s standing there, face pale, brows pinched together in pure concern. “Governor Harkness is missing.”
You blink. “Wait—what?”
“She’s gone. No one’s seen her since after lunch. The guards already checked the whole hotel—indoor pool, outdoor pool, rooftop bar, buffet, her room. Nothing.”
You widen your eyes for effect, eyebrows arching. “Oh my God. Are you serious?”
Billy nods, running a hand through his hair. “We even called her phone. No answer.”
Your stomach twists—not just from guilt, but from fuck, you just know someone might’ve seen her enter your room. Or worse—the cameras.
“Where’s the last place you saw her?” he asks, eyes searching yours.
Your brain flashes—Agatha’s fingers between your thighs, the way she whispered your name like a promise, the shower, the way she laughed against your skin before you both passed out wrapped in each other. You feel heat crawl up your neck.
“After lunch,” you say smoothly, calling on every ounce of drama club experience you’ve ever had. “That’s the last time I saw her.”
He believes you. God, he buys it. His shoulders relax just slightly.
“I’m gonna check the front desk and see if they can pull the cameras,” he says. “Might help.”
Your heart nearly stops.
You nod quickly, pretending to be the calm, logical one. “Yeah—yeah, good idea. That’ll help. I’m sure she’s just… somewhere.”
He offers you a grateful smile. “Thanks. I’ll see you downstairs?”
You nod. “Just give me a sec.”
As soon as the door closes, you spin around.
The bathroom door creaks open.
Agatha peeks her head out, amused. “So… I definitely need to get back to my room before he checks the cameras.”
You laugh breathlessly. “Yeah, you definitely do.”
She steps out, crossing to you, her hands brushing your sides again like she can’t help it. “See you at dinner?”
You nod, smirking. “See you at dinner.”
You lean in and kiss her—quick, but warm. You both linger for a second before pulling away. Agatha bends down, picks up her cover-up and bikini from the floor, then walks toward you again and kisses you once more—deeper, this time.
Then she walks to your door.
You follow, heart still racing but for a very different reason now. You open it, and she turns to look at you.
You nod—go.
She slips out, quietly unlocking and slipping into her room across the hall.
The moment you close your door, you exhale.
And then you grin. Big. Stupid.
You’re smiling like an idiot.
-
Later that evening, you take your time getting ready—just enough to look effortless. A beige button-up shirt, sleeves rolled, paired with dark trousers that sit comfortably on your hips. You tie your hair into a bun, neat but not too polished. A little blush, a dab of lip tint, a spritz of that perfume she once complimented. You check yourself once in the mirror, grab your phone, and leave the room.
You knock on Agatha’s door.
It opens a few seconds later, and there she is—hair brushed out, loose waves falling naturally. She’s dressed in a deep wine-colored blouse tucked into high-waisted pants. Casual, but the kind of casual that still makes your stomach flutter.
She gives you that smile. “Come in.”
You step inside, lips twitching. “What took you so long?”
Agatha hums, shutting the door behind you. “Oh, you know,” she says with a low, teasing lilt. “Was just trying to recover from earlier.”
You blink. “Recover?”
She walks past you, deliberate, smug. “Mmhmm,” she purrs, grabbing her clutch. “I was this close to finishing again just remembering your moans.”
You choke.
She turns to you slowly, clearly enjoying herself. “Though next time, if you’d like to return the favor, I wouldn’t mind switching places... just once.”
Your face heats up. “Agatha.”
“Hmm?” she smirks, all too proud.
You open your mouth to throw something back—something bold, something that’ll make her bite her lip—but her phone rings.
The sound breaks through the tension like cold water.
Agatha glances at the screen. “It’s the kids,” she says softly, then answers.
It’s a video call.
The moment the screen lights up, two familiar faces fill the frame—Valentina and Nicholas. Your godchildren. You instantly smile.
“Hi, babies,” Agatha says, her voice gentler now, soft in a way only mothers can do. “Are you okay?”
“We’re okay!” they echo together, a little blurry but happy.
“What about you, Mommy?” Valentina asks.
“I’m okay, sweetheart,” Agatha says, tucking a loose strand behind her ear. “I can’t come home tonight because of the hurricane, but I’ll try tomorrow, alright?”
You watch her, quietly. The way her eyes crease when she worries. The shift in her tone. She’s warm. Real. And you’re seeing her like this—with her guard down. It does something to your chest.
Then Agatha says, “Oh—and look who’s here with me.” She turns the camera your way.
You smile at the screen. “Hey, Val. Nicky. You two holding down the fort?”
They both squeal your name in excitement.
You wave, grinning. “Yeah, we’ll try to get home tomorrow, I promise, okay? I’ll take good care of your mom tonight.”
You glance at Agatha when you say that—slow, knowing—and her eyes meet yours. Heat. Then you look back at the screen, clearing your throat.
“So, don’t worry about Mommy, okay? She’s in good hands.”
They believe you without question.
Agatha turns the screen back to herself, her voice dropping to something gentle again as she reminds them, “Brush your teeth. Sleep early. Be good. Okay?”
“We will! Love you, Mommy!”
“Love you too, darlings. Now go eat.”
She ends the call, her expression lingering for just a moment before she places the phone in her purse.
When she looks at you again, she’s smirking.
You narrow your eyes, confused.
“What?”
She bites her lip, lets out a breath of a chuckle. “Take good care of me, huh?”
You blink.
She smirks. “We’ll see about that.”
And then—she winks.
Your brain short-circuits.
“Jesus Christ,” you mutter under your breath.
Agatha just laughs, brushing past you as she opens the door. “Come on. Dinner’s waiting.”
And you? You’re already thinking about dessert.
-
The restaurant inside the hotel is softly lit—elegant, quiet, humming with polite conversation and the clink of polished silverware. You’re seated at a round table with Agatha beside you, Billy across, the driver and two bodyguards flanking the other chairs. Everyone looks like they belong here: pressed collars, soft voices, expensive wine glasses sweating gently onto linen.
You’re playing your part well—composed, charming, laughing at the right jokes, nodding along as Billy mentions something about the revised schedule for tomorrow. Agatha, beside you, hasn’t said much in the last few minutes. She’s sipping her wine, eyes half-lidded, looking devastating in that wine-colored blouse from earlier. You think she’s just tired. Or bored.
And then you feel it.
Her hand, sliding slowly under the tablecloth, landing gently on your thigh.
You stiffen, your breath catching in your throat.
She doesn’t look at you. Not even a glance. Her face is perfectly neutral, her wine glass tilted delicately toward her mouth. Her fingers, though—those are not behaving.
They move with maddening slowness. First resting. Then brushing. Then tracing tiny, idle circles right above your knee.
You choke—literally.
The sip of water you were taking goes down the wrong pipe and you cough, hard, trying to keep it contained. The entire table reacts.
“Miss? Are you alright?” Billy is already halfway out of his chair, concern etched across his face.
You wave a hand, breathless, forcing a laugh. “I’m—hah—I’m fine. Just the wrong pipe, sorry.”
He hovers a little, unsure, but eventually sits again when you insist.
You take another sip to clear your throat, and when you glance at Agatha, she’s finally looking at you.
She raises a brow, amused, eyes glittering with something far too smug.
Under the table, her hand starts moving again.
You shoot her a look—half warning, half plea—but she just leans in, lips brushing the rim of her wine glass, and whispers, “Sensitive tonight, are we?”
You want to die.
Or kiss her.
Or grind against her fingers until you fall apart in this goddamn chair.
But you smile instead. A tight, forced, diplomatic smile. You pretend to listen to the driver telling some story about traffic back in the city. You even nod. You are so proud of yourself.
But Agatha’s hand? Oh, her hand is not done.
She slips it higher, fingers slow and deliberate, until they slide just beneath the hem of your beige button-up, where the fabric is loosely tucked into your dark trousers. She doesn’t rush—just brushes the skin of your lower stomach, then glides down to the waistband, slipping under it like she owns the right.
Then—lower still.
Her palm flattens against your inner thigh, warm and firm. Her thumb starts stroking in maddeningly slow circles, right where your pulse is thudding hardest. Just high enough to tease, low enough to make you ache.
You clench your jaw.
Your heart pounds—deep, thunderous, a caged animal in your chest.
You cross your legs, trying to get a grip—trying to anchor yourself.
Agatha’s hand doesn't move far. It slides inward, just a few inches, until her fingers rest at the tender place where your inner thigh curves back toward your body. Not your center. Not yet.
Then she holds you there. Just pressure—steady and intentional.
Her fingers don’t grope. They command.
You feel the weight of her touch, the way her palm firms against your thigh, subtly coaxing your legs to part again—not with a push, but with the quiet force of someone who knows you’ll obey.
And god, you do.
Your muscles relax involuntarily. Your legs shift—opening. Just enough for her to slip in further if she wanted. She doesn’t.
Not yet.
Your breath stutters.
You grip your fork tighter, trying to keep your face neutral, trying not to give yourself away. She’s not even looking at you—she’s chewing, calmly nodding along to something Billy is saying about traffic delays and backup generators.
Then her pinky slips lower. Just barely—just enough to brush the curve between your thigh and your center, right where your trousers start to cling.
A soft, damp heat is already gathering between your legs.
And still—no one notices.
You're going to lose your mind.
-
You laugh at something Billy says. You nod when the driver asks if you’ve ever been to Mount Rushmore. You take another bite of food, even though you’re sure your body has forgotten how to chew.
Meanwhile, Agatha leans toward you slightly. “You’re very quiet,” she says, just for your ears. “Is everything alright, sweetheart?”
You want to scream.
You want to drag her to the bathroom and ruin her.
But you manage a breathless, “Perfect,” through a smile so tight it might crack.
-
Dessert arrives with silver spoons, delicate plates, and polite murmurs. You barely register the sight of tiramisu being set in front of you, the glistening dust of cocoa on top, the careful drizzle of liqueur.
Because Agatha hasn’t stopped.
Her hand never left your thigh, and now—now—her fingers shift just slightly, and it’s enough to brush the exact place where you're aching. You gasp, soft and near-silent, but it betrays you anyway. Billy glances up. You wave your hand like you’re reacting to the sweetness of the dessert, like that’s what knocked the air from your lungs.
But the truth is—
Agatha is touching you.
Over your panties, through your trousers. Slow, calculated pressure, the pads of her fingers moving in small, lazy circles against your heat. You’re soaked. There’s no denying it now. You can feel it—the warmth spreading down, dampening the seat of your panties, pressing dark into the fabric of your pants. The shame of it makes your cheeks flush—but God, the shame just turns you on more.
She knows it too.
She shifts beside you like nothing’s happening, bringing a spoonful of dessert to her mouth, lips closing around it with slow, sultry purpose. And while she does, her fingers press just a little harder. A slow, steady pulse.
Your thighs clench. She feels it. Her smile grows.
And all you can do is sit there, barely breathing, trying to hold your spoon steady as you force a small bite of dessert past your lips. You almost moan from the taste—almost, but you bite down on it. Everything feels heightened. Every soft murmur from the others at the table, every scrape of silverware, every brush of linen napkin makes you more aware of the fact that you are soaking wet in public, and Agatha’s fingers are still moving against your pussy through layers that aren’t hiding anything anymore.
You try not to move. Not to push into her hand. But God, you want to.
She leans in again, her voice a whisper meant for only you.
“I can feel it,” she breathes, her words slipping hot into your ear. “You’re dripping for me, baby. I wonder if it’s starting to show.”
You jerk slightly. You know there’s a patch now. You can feel the moisture pressing against your trousers, humid and dark. Your hips twitch, barely, and her fingers reward you with a tighter circle, a deeper press right on your clit, and—
Fuck.
You bite your lip, eyes fluttering shut for a millisecond too long.
“You okay?” Billy asks again, because Billy is unfortunately very attentive, and you hate him for it right now.
You smile—no teeth, no joy, just pure survival. “Yeah,” you say, voice shaky, “just tired.”
“Need some air?” he offers.
Before you can answer, Agatha, all sweet and motherly again, chimes in: “She’s fine. Long day.”
Her fingers don’t stop. If anything, they get bolder. Slower. She presses deeper now, right against the center of your wet panties, and starts drawing smaller, tighter circles, teasing you toward the edge, right there, dragging it out just enough to make your stomach knot with tension.
Your legs twitch again. You’re breathing through your nose, smiling at nothing. You laugh when someone makes a joke about the hotel’s wine list but you’re seeing stars now. There’s no wine. No dessert. No table. Just Agatha’s hand owning your entire body and no one else having a clue.
She leans back again, cool and smug. “You’re doing so well,” she whispers. “I could make you come like this, couldn’t I? Right here, while they’re all finishing dessert.”
You whimper—but it’s low, barely audible. Just a hitched breath.
She pushes just a little harder. You jerk your hand under the table and grip her wrist—not to stop her, but to feel it. Feel the intent, the possessiveness. She lets you. Her fingers grind slow against your soaked center.
“I could make you come,” she repeats, her tone darker now. “But I won’t. Not yet.”
And then, cruelly, she pulls her hand back.
Just like that. The pressure disappears.
You nearly cry.
She licks the tip of her spoon, then turns to you and says—out loud, in her usual voice—“Are you sure you don’t want to get some air?”
Her eyes flicker, daring you.
Your body is trembling. Your panties are soaked. Your thighs are clenched. Your breath is uneven.
You glance down, barely, and you can see it—the shadow of moisture on your trousers. Not obvious to others, but to you? Devastating.
You nod.
“Yeah,” you breathe. “Air sounds good.”
She stands first, smoothing her blouse. “We’ll just take a moment,” she says to the table, all casual grace and poise.
You follow her out, thighs pressed together, arousal pooling between your legs. You don’t look back. You just follow her lead.
The air in the hallway is cooler, quiet. Muted carpet beneath your shoes, the soft hum of hotel lights overhead. You’re still trembling, your soaked panties sticking to you with every step, your skin flushed with heat. You watch the sway of Agatha’s hips as she walks ahead, calm and purposeful, as if she hadn’t just nearly made you come at a dinner table full of people.
You catch up to her in just a few strides, your voice low. “Where are we going?”
She presses the elevator button with one hand, then turns her head to look at you. Her eyes—still sharp, still hungry.
“My room,” she says simply.
You blink, trying to ground yourself. “Wait—but what about Billy? And the others?”
“They’ll be fine.” She shrugs. “Billy has my credit card. I’ll text him later.”
“But—”
“They’ll assume I went to bed. And you?” She leans in, whispering near your ear, her breath hot. “You looked like you needed some help walking.”
The elevator dings. The doors slide open.
You both step in.
The doors close behind you with a hush—and the second they do, it changes.
Agatha moves fast, crowding you into the corner of the elevator with one arm pressed beside your head and the other grabbing your waist. Her lips are on yours before you can breathe. It’s not gentle. It’s not sweet. It’s fire. Her tongue presses into your mouth like it belongs there, and you open for her instinctively, helplessly, your arms clutching at her waist as you kiss back with everything you’ve been holding in all night.
She bites your bottom lip, tugging, then kisses it better, her thigh slipping between yours, pressing up. You moan into her mouth, low and broken, grinding into her like it’s the only thing keeping you alive.
“You’re soaking through,” she whispers against your mouth. “I can feel it.”
You gasp. She doesn’t stop.
Her hand slips down, squeezing your ass through your trousers, dragging you harder against her leg. “I should’ve fucked you at the table,” she murmurs. “Let you fall apart while Billy smiled at the waiter.”
The elevator dings.
You freeze.
The doors begin to slide open—and Agatha pulls away from you with lightning speed, adjusting her blouse, her breathing calm but eyes still alight with want. You mirror her—barely. You wipe your lips, straighten your shirt, try to not look like you were about to come apart seconds ago.
A man in a hotel polo shirt steps in, nodding at you both. He presses a floor button and stands a respectful distance away.
You try not to breathe too loudly. Try not to look at Agatha.
She’s standing beside you now, hands folded, lips still flushed, eyes focused on the light-up floor numbers as if she didn’t just tongue-fuck your mouth like she missed it.
But then—her hand brushes yours.
Casual. A touch. Nothing more.
And she whispers, so softly you almost miss it, “You’re going to come on my mouth the second we close that door.”
Your knees nearly give out.
The elevator dings again.
The man steps out, offers a polite “Good evening,” and disappears down the hallway.
The doors begin to close.
Before they even finish sliding shut, Agatha grabs your hand, dragging you down the hallway with a new urgency, your heartbeat racing.
She opens her door with practiced ease, card tapping, handle turning.
The moment you’re both inside—door shut, lock, then turns to you, and something in her gaze—something dark, burning—pins you where you stand.
“Take it off,” she says, voice low, rough.
Your eyes widen. “What?”
“Your pants,” she clarifies, taking a step forward. “Take them off.”
There’s no room for question. No softness in her voice now. You’re too far gone to argue anyway. With shaky hands, you reach for the waistband, fingers fumbling as you unfasten your trousers. She watches—silent, eyes dragging over every inch of you. When you finally push them down, she catches sight of the soaked fabric between your thighs.
Her breath catches.
“You really were dripping,” she murmurs.
You feel your face burn, your thighs instinctively trying to close—but she’s already there, hand gripping your hip, thumb stroking over the band of your underwear. Her touch makes you shiver. You're still wearing your shirt, your panties, but you’re completely exposed in every way that matters.
She sinks to her knees.
Oh god.
“Agatha—” Your voice breaks on her name, barely a whisper.
“Shh.” She presses her mouth right over your center, the heat of her breath making your knees buckle. “Let me taste you.”
And then—she licks you through the soaked fabric. Long, slow, deliberate.
You moan—helpless, wrecked. Your head thuds softly against the wall behind you as she mouths at you, teasing through your panties, tongue tracing the soaked outline of your folds, nose pressed against you like she can’t get close enough.
“You smell like sex,” she says, voice thick.
Then she hooks her fingers into the sides of your underwear and pulls—slowly, torturously—until it slips down your legs.
The air hits you. Cool. Exposed.
And then her mouth is on you, directly—no fabric, no barrier.
You cry out, hips jerking forward. Her tongue flicks over your clit, then presses flat and heavy, licking up your slick with slow, greedy strokes. She moans like it’s her favorite flavor. You thread your fingers through her hair, clutching tight as your legs tremble, thighs spread shamelessly to give her more.
“Please,” you gasp, “please don’t stop—”
She doesn’t.
She licks you deeper, slower. Not fast. Not rough. Just... intentional. She’s savoring you. Driving you mad. And her hands—oh, her hands are gripping your thighs to keep you right where she wants you, her thumbs brushing circles into your skin to ground you.
You can barely breathe.
You look down, and she’s staring up at you while she licks—tongue buried deep, eyes locked on yours—and it’s too much.
You whimper, breath breaking. “I’m—Agatha, I’m gonna—”
She doesn’t move.
She just groans into you and sucks your clit, slow and perfect.
And that’s it.
Your orgasm crashes through you so fast and so hard you nearly collapse. Your hands clutch at her hair, your back arches off the wall, your legs threatening to give out. You ride it out on her tongue, gasping her name, your thighs trembling as you come completely undone.
She doesn’t pull away until you’re shaking.
Then—only then—she rises, lips wet, mouth swollen, eyes dark with satisfaction.
You’re still panting, brain barely working.
She cups your jaw, presses a soft kiss to your lips, lets you taste yourself on her tongue.
And then she says—low and certain:
“Now take your shirt off and get on the bed. I’m not done with you yet.”
You do what she says.
Still breathless, you reach for the buttons of your shirt with shaky fingers, undoing them one by one as Agatha watches, arms crossed, lips parted, pupils blown wide with want.
You shrug it off your shoulders, letting it fall to the floor.
You’re left in your bra—thin, pale fabric stretched over your breasts, your nipples already pebbling beneath the material, aching.
Agatha’s eyes drop.
And her mouth twitches into something sinful.
“God, look at you,” she murmurs, stepping forward. “Still flushed. Still wet. And now I get these.”
She cups your breasts through the bra—firm, full, confident.
You gasp, back arching instinctively into her touch.
She groans, low in her throat. “You’re so fucking sensitive tonight.”
You nod, helpless.
“Take it off.”
You reach behind, fumbling with the clasp of your bra, hands unsteady. She steps closer, brushing your fingers aside.
“Let me.”
She unhooks you with ease—fingertips grazing your spine—and you shiver at the closeness, at the heat of her breath on your shoulder.
The bra slips off your arms.
She drops it to the floor, and now you’re bare before her—topless, trembling, thighs still sticky from her mouth.
Agatha exhales, slow. Like she’s trying to memorize the sight of you.
“Perfect,” she whispers.
And then—her hands are on your breasts.
She palms them gently at first, brushing her thumbs over your nipples in slow, slow circles. You whimper—a soft, broken sound—and she leans in to press open-mouthed kisses across your chest, down the slope of one breast, nuzzling the softness with a low moan.
“You like this?” she murmurs against your skin.
“Yes,” you breathe. “Yes—fuck—please, Agatha—”
She takes one nipple between her fingers and pinches—firm but careful.
You gasp.
Your hips twitch.
She watches your reaction closely, then does it again, flicking the sensitive bud between her fingers while the other hand rolls your other nipple, teasing, stroking, tugging just enough to make your toes curl.
You’re melting.
“You’re shaking,” she whispers, voice dark with pride.
Then her mouth replaces her hand—she sucks one nipple into her mouth, tongue flicking over it in soft, rhythmic strokes while her other hand keeps playing with the opposite one.
You moan—head back, thighs clenching, spine arching into her as her mouth toys with you, worships you. Her teeth graze—light, enough to make you whimper—and then she soothes it with her tongue, hot and slick and so good.
She switches to the other breast without warning, and the loss stings—but then her mouth wraps around your other nipple and your knees nearly give out.
You clutch her shoulders, panting.
“I c-can’t—” you choke out. “You’re gonna make me come again—”
She pulls back slightly, lips wet, breath shaky. “Just from this?”
You nod, helpless. Embarrassed. So turned on.
Her smile is wicked.
“Oh, sweetheart,” she says softly, almost sweetly. “Let me.”
She brings both hands up now, fingers tweaking, rolling, tugging your nipples in tandem while her mouth kisses up your collarbone, to your throat, to your jaw.
“You’re mine tonight,” she whispers. “You come when I say. You shake when I say. And you fall apart for me…”
She pinches both nipples—harder.
“…right now.”
You cry out.
The pressure. The heat. Her voice. Her mouth. Her fingers—
It breaks you.
Your orgasm rips through you—just from the way she plays with your breasts—your legs trembling, body arching against hers as your head falls back and you moan, wrecked and open.
She catches you when you collapse, pulling you into her arms, holding you against her chest while you shake.
“Fuck,” you whisper, dazed. “Fuck, Agatha—”
She kisses your temple.
You’re still trembling—sensitive, bare, breath foggy—when she holds you close.
Your cheek presses against her chest, your lips brushing the collar of her blouse, and for a second you think maybe she’s giving you a break.
But then she pulls back.
She cups your chin, tilts your face up to meet hers.
And her voice—low, firm, devastating—says, “Now take this off me.”
You blink up at her.
She straightens her spine, hands falling to her sides, presenting herself like a gift. That wine-colored blouse tucked neatly into her high-waisted pants, the fabric hugging her waist, her breasts outlined in perfect silhouette.
You sit up, slowly.
And begin with the first button.
Your fingers move carefully, deliberately. One button at a time. The soft pop of thread slipping through fabric feels impossibly loud in the quiet of the room. Her breathing deepens as you go lower, her chest rising and falling more visibly with each undone button.
You push the blouse off her shoulders.
It pools behind her like silk, revealing a dark, lace-trimmed bra that hugs her curves too well. Your mouth goes dry. You run your hands over the bare skin of her collarbones, down the tops of her breasts, your thumbs grazing the edge of the bra cups.
She watches you. Still. Breath controlled. Letting you take your time.
“Next,” she whispers.
You kneel in front of her, your hands sliding to her waist, and slowly you undo the clasp of her pants, tugging them open. You press a kiss to her stomach, right above the waistband. Then another. Then a third, slower.
She makes a sound this time—quiet, guttural.
You look up at her, teasing. “You’re already wet, aren’t you?”
Her jaw tightens.
You smirk and tug her pants down. She steps out of them with slow elegance, left only in her heels, her matching dark lace panties, and that sinful bra. God.
She’s magnificent.
“You can worship me now,” she says, half-joking.
But you take her seriously.
You rise onto your knees, hands on her thighs, lips brushing the inside of one as you whisper, “Sit on the edge of the bed.”
Her brow arches.
But she obeys.
She sits—legs apart, breasts rising with every breath—and you lean in between her thighs.
You press kisses to her skin, trailing up the inside of her leg, taking your time, hands smoothing upward to her hips. You nuzzle your face against her clothed center, inhaling the heady scent of her arousal already soaking into the lace.
She shudders.
You pull the panties aside—not off, just aside—and look up at her as you drag your tongue from the base of her slit to her clit in one long, slow stroke.
Her eyes flutter closed.
You do it again.
Then again, with pressure.
And then your mouth is on her, tongue working in slow, deliberate circles around her clit as you moan into her heat.
She grabs the edge of the bed, head falling back. “F-fuck…”
You smile against her, then suck her clit gently, your tongue flattening against her as your fingers slide up to toy with her panties—still pushed to the side, barely hanging on. You keep licking, keep teasing, letting your fingers trail up to her thighs, squeezing, grounding her.
She moans louder now, her hips beginning to move, trying to grind against your mouth.
But you hold her still.
You pull back just enough to whisper against her, “Be good.”
She lets out a breathless laugh. “You’re getting cocky.”
You grin. “You like it.”
She opens her eyes, looks down at you with fire.
And then—your mouth is back on her, this time fast, tongue flicking over her clit while your fingers trace around her entrance, slow and threatening.
She grabs your hair.
Hard.
You moan into her, the vibration making her curse above you. “Y/N—”
You press two fingers into her—slow, deep, curling upward just enough to make her jolt.
“Fuck—”
You smile, your lips sealed around her clit, fingers fucking into her now with purpose. You moan into her again, letting her ride your mouth, letting her lose it, and she does—completely.
Her thighs tense. Her abs tighten. And then she’s shaking, her orgasm hitting like a wave, loud and raw and hers. She cries out your name, hand tangled in your hair, body arching off the bed.
You don’t stop until her thighs twitch and she’s gasping—“Okay, okay, f-fuck, stop—”
You pull back.
Your mouth is wet with her. Your chin glistens. You lick your lips, eyes still locked on hers.
She stares at you like she’s never seen you before.
And then she reaches out, grabs your wrist, and pulls you up.
Onto her lap.
Straddling her.
And she says, voice wrecked, “I’m gonna ride you until you forget your own name.”
Taglist: @6stolenangel9 @charlottelinlin1 @milflovers4 @claramelooo @loveshineslikethesky @kaymariesworld @marcelinaceciliarose @misskassycollins @greyella @theothersideofthescreen @whitelotus00 @agathaallalongg @psychickryptonitebouquet @sweetmidnights @angel-kitten-babygirl-u-choose @filmedbyharkness @brekker157 @rizzlesregal13 @starbucks-06 @aboutcustardcreams @crescendoofstars @neverfindmegone @mommy-mommy-mommy-hi @theonefairygodmother @isixxxx @hannah-0730 @starryjeongyeon @atlasimagines @whoreforolderfictionalwomen @darlingaura @upsidedowndanvers @iiiheartwomen @cocoever @morgananyx @wifeofmanymilfs @lowlyjelly
#agatha harkness x reader#agatha harkness x fem!reader#agatha harkness x you#agatha x reader#agatha x you#kathryn hahn x reader#agatha all along#agatha harkness#YouWereNeverMinetoLose#agatha harkness smut
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How do you feel about your kieranpon au gaining alot of traction lately? I've seen it talked about in several discords, and of course all the new art on the tag?
HONESTLY I’m super flattered and happy to see it’s getting so much love 😭 This isn’t the first time an AU of mine has blown up and it always takes me by surprise. Y’all are so sweet, I’m so glad you’re enjoying it enough to want to make content for it yourselves!! It’s the ultimate compliment to an artist to create something that other people get into and start talking about. Makes my heart all fuzzy and warm 🥰
#Shima answers questions#Kieranpon AU#Shima’s AUs#I’M SUPER GRATEFUL. Like. You have no idea#Every time somebody mentions it or draws something for it I’m like. AAAA?? MY AU?? MINE?? 😭💖#IT JUST MEANS A LOT#Especially since like. This is just how I am. My brain never shuts off so I’m always thinking of new stuff#New ideas and AUs and characters and whatnot#It’s just nice to get a reaction for that. To have someone appreciate that my brain is always on creative overdrive haha
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um shes also my beloved mutual
WHY AM I JUST NOW SEEING THIS
#so sorry first of all#but i read like the first half of the article before they asked me to subscribe#and wow#someone made an entire article about the commonality of my name 😭 like i need a reminder#but THIS IS ALSO SO FUNNY#like yeah guys pls mention the very popular former one direction fan blogger named emily 😕😕#cause i am The Emily#also fun fact my name is SUPER common but i actually have never had to share a class with an emily or even had an emily in my graduating#class#which i am very grateful for!!#also i’m abt to send a pic to you that i took like a few weeks ago but forgot to show you#and something funny is that my mom HATES when i bring up how i don’t like having a basic name#which is valid#but she’s always like ugh you have no idea how hard it is to figure out what to name your child#and then says she got my name from a book …#and her goal was to name me and my sisters all names of Irish origin#(we don’t even know if we’re irish)#and she thought emily was but it’s literally not 😭#however my sister’s names both are so 👏👏 2/3 pretty solid#and they also have mildly unique names i’m totally not jealous#betsy boop#ask#love you sorry for missing this
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Eeeeeeeeeee, hiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!!!!
#cluelesscc#personal ramblings#Literally so much has happened in the last 2 months!#I studied a bunch and passed all my certification exams.#With my new endorsement I then landed a like crazy amazing job that I never have even considered.#They only hire people with a lot of experience and an inside recommendation which I did NOT have!#so I literally have no idea how I even go it!!! Buuuut it’s like so so sooo much work.#I’m super overwhelmed but also feel like I can only be grateful because like wow they chose me.#Anyways hi!! I’m alive!! Love you!#<3333
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I went to a school to test some kids today for my thesis and the teacher who received me and talked to me while we waited for the headmaster was the nicest person 💕💕💕
#he was like ‘ah what are you doing for your thesis’ and we started talking and he has a philosophy degree and we like debated about#psychology and philosophy and education and stuff#and he was so interesting and also sooo nice he kept like saying ‘wow I’m really enjoying your ideas and your perspective’#and then he was also super nice when I needed a place to test the kids in and he like helped me move chairs and tables and get the kids from#their classes#then I had to stay there over lunch time and he was like adamant that I must eat and that the school could give me food and I didn’t have to#go out and buy anything but I had to tell him no bc my stomach is sooo sensitive I couldn’t eat (and also I’m a picky eater aksjjdd)#and he was like so worried that I would faint that i would be hungry or thirsty etc#and then when I finished he insisted on walking me out of the school and to a main avenue — because the school is in this kind of ‘unsafe/#dangerous’ area and I was like ‘thank you but you don’t have to’ bc he had helped so much#but he wouldn’t hear of it so he did walk me and I was so grateful bc a) I have THE worst sense of direction so I was going to get lost#and b) it was a really long way to the main avenue and I was glad for the company to distract myself of how tired and hungry I actually was#and lastly he told me that he really wanted to come to my thesis presentation whenever I did it because he was really impressed by how well#i articulated myself and how interesting my subject was which was so 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺#idk it was really like such a heartwarming thing he was just SO incredibly nice and made a day that could’ve been sooo tiring a lot better#uni#personal
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obviously i have not read the manga or ch431 but my controversial take of the day is i think maybe you guys overreacted. all these “i survived the depression of ch431” i think you’re being dramatic and maybe even rude to the author…
#debated not posting this because ‘is it worth it to start fights on the internet’ but actually idc you guys are annoying me#i keep seeing posts about it and i just dgaf#‘kats you haven’t read it you don’t understand’ i also don’t care#hope that helps#i trust horikoshi’s writing capabilities and if he thought this was a fitting end then it was a fitting end i do not give a shit#i just think it’s super lame to be like ‘i love mha so much!!!’ and then send the author death threats or other hate#all because he didn’t fulfill your specific fantasy. have you considered that maybe you have poor reading comprehension#and maybe your idea of canon is just fanonized and full of projection#and maybe you’re wrong?#idk. just really grates my cheese yk#this isn’t @ anyone in specific by the way. and it’s not about people who genuinely tried to give the ending grace and understanding#it’s not about anyone who approached it with an open mind and willingness to dig deep into the meaning#because as much as you might want it to be mha is not a surface-level media. it’s just not#and i think a lot of you miss that#this is more about people acting like 431 was the end of the world#it just feels real disrespectful to the author who i am pretty damn sure had a reason for whatever he did#anyway. i’m not giving this a bunch of tags for the reason stated at the beginning but i will give it this#kats rants#kats rants in tags
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𝐃𝐎 𝐌𝐄 𝐀 𝐅𝐀𝐕𝐎𝐑



pairing: steve harrington x fem!reader
word count: 8.7k words
summary: in which you and steve randomly meet at a bar and realize that you two can help each other out with a similar problem
warnings: explicit language, mentions of alcohol/drinking, mentions of past bad relationships (very recent breakups), smut (18+), oral (f!receiving), protected p in v sex
author’s note: i genuinely can’t believe how long this ended up being lol hope yall enjoy though!<333
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
“We could be the greatest wingwoman and wingman for you right now if you just let us, dingus.”
Steve rolled his eyes at Robin’s words. “I already let you guys drag me to this bar, isn’t that enough?”
Robin responded with a simple, “No, it’s not” before taking another sip of her drink, while Eddie said something about how if this were a year ago, they wouldn’t have had to force Steve to this bar because he would have suggested the idea himself.
“Monica changed you for the worse, man,” Eddie continued, and Steve only frowned at him.
Robin gave Eddie’s arm a quick whack. “Hey, we promised no Monica slander tonight. At least not right in front of him.”
Steve gave them both the most unamused look. “You guys really had to make a deal about that? To not talk shit about my ex?”
“Okay, don’t say it like that,” Robin told him. “It would actually be super warranted if we did wanna talk shit about her. She was super pretentious and she hated all of your friends; me and Eddie, especially.”
Steve couldn’t think of a rebuttal to that on the spot, so he ended up saying nothing. And then he reminded himself that Monica had brutally dumped him two weeks ago, so why should he even want to defend her to his best friends anymore?
“There’s seriously not one girl here right now that you could maybe be interested in?” Eddie asked, and Steve was grateful that the conversation was at least slightly shifting away from Monica.
But, he didn’t even take a quick look around the bar before answering Eddie’s question with an immediate “No” and hoping that the subject would change again.
Eddie groaned and then proceeded to finish what was left of his beer, and Robin sighed before saying, “If you at least talked to a random girl here, and just maybe flirted a little bit, don’t you think you’d feel a little less sad about the breakup?”
“I’m not sad about it, though,” Was Steve’s immediate response, and it was only kind of a lie.
It really wasn’t Monica breaking up with him that made him sad; it was more about him spending almost a year of his life with someone that he knew he probably shouldn’t have been with in the first place because of how incompatible they were. That hard truth was what made him feel sad and a little stupid. Actually, scratch that, a lot stupid. But things with her had become so comfortable and routine that it eventually felt easier staying than leaving.
Robin simply gave him a look before shaking her head. “You’re a terrible liar. Last night I saw you watching that one National Geographic documentary that you only watch when you’re sad. Which I still find kinda weird, but you’re my best friend and I love you and all of your weird coping habits.”
“Wait, which documentary is it again?” Eddie asked, laughing a little. “The one about the whales or the one about the lions?”
“Whales,” Robin answered. “And it's like three hours long.”
“I’m going to the bathroom,” Steve abruptly said before Robin or Eddie could say anything else.
He left his half-drunk beer with his friends and walked away from the high table they’d been occupying for the past hour and headed toward where the bathrooms were down a random hallway.
“Don’t try to sneak out the back. We have your location and we will find you,” He heard Robin say from behind him. “And don’t turn it off now that I just mentioned it.”
Steve laughed as he held up his hand, giving her a quick thumbs-up in response.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
There was only so much waiting and hiding you could do, so you decided to ask the first guy that you saw exiting the bathroom.
“Hey, are the two girls sitting at the end of the right side of the bar looking this way?”
Surprisingly, this random guy didn’t question why you were asking him that, or why you couldn’t check that yourself, or even question why you were so obviously hiding in this slightly secluded hallway where the terrible bathrooms were.
Instead, he stepped out of the hallway a little bit and took a peek around the corner for you, and then turned back to you after a second. “Yeah, I see two girls looking this way.”
“Shit.”
“Who are they?”
“My friends.”
The confused look he gave you was immediate. “Why are you trying to avoid your friends?”
You sighed as you leaned back against the wall behind you. “Because they’re trying to convince me that going home with a random guy tonight will help me get over my boyfriend who just broke up with me.”
The laugh he let out in response surprised you. It also made you feel equal parts offended and amused.
“Is my devastating heartbreak funny to you?”
For the most part, you were exaggerating; your breakup with Elliott hadn’t actually been all too devastating— no outward lying or cheating, just a lot of miscommunications and bad timings— but you kind of wanted this random guy to feel at least a little bad for laughing at you.
“Shit, no, sorry,” He said, and his cheeks reddened a bit in what you could only assume was embarrassment, and you suddenly felt kind of bad about getting so defensive. “I just laughed because my friends are trying to do the same thing for me, too.”
“Oh, sorry,” You said, feeling slightly worse now that you knew that you two were in the same boat. “Sorry about your breakup.”
He shrugged like it was fine. “How long have you been standing here hiding from your friends?”
“Five minutes, maybe,” You answered as you pulled out your phone to quickly check the time. Seeing that it was a little after ten thirty let you know that you’d actually been standing here for closer to ten minutes, but you didn’t correct yourself. “My plan is to somehow find an opening to slip out the front door, and then I’ll send them a picture from my Uber telling them that I left.”
“Solid plan.”
“I can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic or not.”
“Maybe a little bit,” He said, giving you a small smile, and it was then that you were realizing, or finally noticing, that this guy was cute; even in the shitty bar lighting you could tell that.
Maybe it was because of his sweet smile, or maybe it was the denim jacket he was wearing over a plain white t-shirt that suited him really well. Or maybe it was his hair that looked as if he got out of bed and pushed a quick hand through it and then proceeded to leave his home, and you meant that in the best way possible.
Either way, this guy was really cute and so clearly your type— even though you felt like you were in no place to consider anything romantic with anyone, you could recognize his attractiveness— and you were suddenly being hit with an idea.
“Wait, you said that your friends are trying to set you up with someone here too, right?”
He let out a sigh. “Yeah, they are.”
“And I’m guessing by that sigh that you don’t wanna do that?” You asked, and when he shook his head in answer, you continued. “Okay, I think we maybe can help each other get out of here. This might sound a little insane since we literally don’t know each other at all, but let’s just pretend we really like each other in front of our friends— like, be super flirty and whatever. And then we’ll leave here together, letting them think that we’re gonna…” The thought of saying the word suddenly made you feel awkward, so you didn’t. “Do what they want us to do.”
After taking a moment to process your sudden idea— you honestly wouldn’t have been surprised if the guy said no because it was pretty weird— he nodded. “That’s actually a really great idea.”
“Thank you. I’m known for my great ideas, actually,” You said, smiling at him as you reached out to grab his hand and intertwine it with yours.
If the thought of saying that you and this stranger were gonna have sex made you feel awkward, then abruptly holding his hand should’ve felt weird too, but surprisingly it didn’t. “Alright, let’s just act like we’re super into each other, I guess.”
“I’m Steve, by the way,” He told you.
“Oh, yeah, that’s probably important information to know,” You said and then proceeded to tell him your name too.
You led the way to your friends and the small corner of the bar where they were lingering by.
“Hey, guys, this is Steve,” You said and slapped on the happiest smile you could muster at the moment.
“Steve,” Danielle was the first one to say something after noticing your and Steve’s interlocked hands. “What’s your last name?”
“Harrington.”
And then Amy was jumping in. “How old are you?”
“Twenty-three.”
“What do you do?”
“I work at the record store down the street.”
“So, you’re a music guy?”
“Not really, I guess. My friend got me a job there.”
You decided to stop the interrogation before Steve got scared away by this back and forth questioning Danielle and Amy were doing. “Okay, okay, that’s enough of the interview. His friends are gonna think he ditched them or something.”
“You guys should come over to the table we’re at,” Steve said and then pointed in the direction of where his friends were with his free hand. “There’s enough room.”
You nodded at his words. “That’s a great idea.”
If Danielle or Amy were aware of this act you were putting on— how you were no longer rejecting their idea of you flirting with some guy to “get over” Elliott— they didn’t call you out on it. Instead, they agreed that going to the table with Steve’s friends was a good idea.
Quick introductions were made, and then the group settled into typical small talk. However, you and Steve deliberately fell into your own kind of “flirty conversation” and played it up for your friends, all of whom tried to pretend that they weren’t intensely watching you two, but they failed miserably at hiding their staring, which was exactly what you both wanted.
After a few minutes of exaggerated smiles and elated laughs, Steve leaned in close to your ear. “How long do you think we’re gonna have to do this?”
You softly giggled like he just whispered the sweetest thing to you and then leaned into his ear. “Follow my lead.”
You pulled back and then shifted so that you were standing closer to him, and he quickly took the hint and wrapped his arm around you.
“Hey,” You said, grabbing the attention of your friends and his, which was easy because they had already been half-listening to you and Steve anyway. “We’re gonna head out of here, so we’ll see you guys later.”
There was a mix of confused and surprised looks that crossed all over their faces for the briefest moment, and then Amy was the one to first say something. “Really?”
“Yeah,” You nodded. “I want to take Steve to my place to show him something.”
“Since I’ve never seen the second Home Alone movie, we’re gonna watch that,” Steve added. Out of all of the movies he could’ve said, you weren’t sure why he was mentioning a Christmas one in September, but sure, you’d play along.
“You’re gonna watch a movie?” Robin asked, somehow looking both skeptical and amused.
Steve nodded. “Yeah.”
“Yup,” You agreed as you reached up to lace your fingers with his hand that was around your shoulders and used that to push yourself even closer to him.
“Okay,” Eddie said, failing to bite back his grin. “Have fun watching a movie.”
“We will,” Steve told him and gave your hand a light squeeze.
“I’ll text you guys later,” You said to Danielle and Amy, who were looking at you with equally surprised but happy looks. After so many years of friendship, it was pretty easy to read each other, but you hoped that they couldn’t see through what you were doing; you hoped you were faking all of this well enough.
Neither of them said anything, though, and they instead nodded and said different versions of “We’ll talk to you in the morning,” which let you know that they were just happy that you were actually following through with what they wanted you to do tonight.
Steve pulled his arm from around you and just went to normally holding your hand, and you two said final goodbyes to your friends and then headed away from the table. You two stayed practically attached at the hip until you were out of the door. The cold hit you immediately, but it wasn’t too unbearable with your jacket on, although you still wished that you had opted for a better dress. You gave Steve a quick look as the bar door closed behind you both.
“Nice idea with the movie thing, even though Home Alone 2 is so random,” You said with a laugh. “They all definitely think we’re about to go have sex in my apartment.”
“I’ve kinda used that movie line before,” Steve said. “It’s been a while, but Robin and Eddie still know what it means.”
You gave him an amused smile. “Okay, so Home Alone 2 is code for ‘I’m about to go hook up with this random girl’?”
“No, I don’t use the same movie every time,” He laughed a little. “That one was just the first thing that came to my mind this time.”
You nodded as you slipped your hand from his and you reached into the pocket of your jacket to pull out your phone. You opened the Uber app and ordered a car so that you could finally go home.
“So, what are your plans for the rest of the night?” Steve asked as you slipped your phone back in your pocket.
“Head home and probably finish the bottle of wine that I had been drinking before my friends dragged me here, and then call my ex and leave very stupid voicemails.”
You didn’t mean to be so honest— if your friends had asked you that question, you would’ve lied and avoided any and all mentions of Elliott because you wanted to make it seem like you were dealing with the breakup just fine— but talking to Steve made you want to be truthful for some reason; maybe because you two were going through the same thing.
“That doesn’t sound like the best idea.”
“It’s not,” You agreed, but didn’t say that you wouldn’t still be following through with it.
Things became quiet as you two stood on this sidewalk, not at all as close as you two were when you were trying to play things up in front of your friends. There was actual space between you two for the first time in the last ten minutes, and you weren’t looking at him anymore, instead, you were focused on the quiet street. The faint sounds of all the noise coming from inside the bar managed to fill the silence, and you wondered if this was the part where you two were supposed to go your separate ways. Now that you helped each other get what you both wanted, what else was there to say or do?
You were about to mumble something along the lines of “Thanks for your help tonight,” but Steve was speaking before you could. “My ex texted me earlier.”
Weirdly enough, you actually felt a little relieved that he was keeping the conversation going. You honestly didn’t mind talking to him. There was something about this entire conversation that felt so simple and easy, even though you were talking about kind of shitty things.
You looked at him. “Is that a good thing or a bad thing?”
“My friends would say bad. And a part of me knows it’s bad too, but I don’t know,” He shrugged. “It’s kinda tempting.”
You understood what he meant completely, but you still gave him advice that you probably wouldn’t have taken for yourself. “Okay, well, if my opinion matters at all in this, which I know it probably doesn’t, you shouldn’t text her back.”
“And then, in that case, you shouldn’t drunk call your ex,” He reminded you.
“Why did you two break up?” You asked instead of outwardly agreeing with his words.
“She did it two weeks ago over the phone,” Steve told you. “She said that things were feeling “off” between us and maybe they always had been.”
“Ouch,” That word felt like an understatement to represent just how shitty breaking up with someone over a phone call was, but it was all you could manage to say right then.
He gave you a quick nod, breaking your gaze for a second, and then he threw the question your way. “What about you?”
“He wanted to move to California, and I wanted to stay here,” You answered. That was the short version of it; the easy version of it.
“Okay, that sounds pretty amicable,” Steve responded.
You almost simply agreed with him just to let this part of the conversation end, but it didn't feel right doing that. For reasons you couldn’t fully recognize just yet, you didn’t want to lie to Steve.
“It wasn’t,” You admitted softly. “The moving thing came up months ago, and if we were smart, we would’ve just ended things then, but we didn’t. I told him I didn’t want to move, and he said that was fine, but it definitely wasn’t fine. He started pulling away and being a dick, and we both became really shitty toward each other by the end of it until he finally broke up with me and then moved like he wanted to.”
“Okay, nevermind. That sounds like it sucked.”
“And yours seems pretty bad too,” You said. “Doing it over the phone is such a fucked move. Did you see it coming?”
“No, but also yes, which probably doesn’t even make sense,” He answered, and in your eyes, it did make sense, but you didn’t interrupt him to tell him that. “There was something that always felt “off” about us, but in the moment, it never seemed like that big of a deal. Looking back now, though, it’s so obvious that we were never gonna work, and I guess it’s kinda good that she ended it.”
“But, she texted you today,” You reminded him.
“Yeah,” He said and then sighed.
“I still don’t think you should say anything back to her,” You told him. “Now, after hearing that she broke up with you over the phone, she definitely doesn’t deserve a text back.”
“If you don’t call your ex tonight, I won’t text mine back,” Steve said, giving you a look that you couldn’t fully decipher, but you were still nodding at his words.
“Deal,” You said and then held out your hand for him to shake— because it felt like the obvious thing to do, even if the “deal” you two were making was a playful one— and he did. You didn’t understand how his hand was still warm after being out in the cold for the past few minutes, but it was nice all the same.
As if on cue, a car pulled up in front of the bar with the all too familiar Uber sticker in its windshield. You looked at it for a quick second and then at your phone to make sure it was the right car. And then after that confirmation, you looked at Steve.
“You coming?”
The confused look he gave you was immediate. “You want me to?”
You nodded and smiled at him. “Yeah, how else are we gonna make sure we both follow through with the deal we just made?”
“Makes sense,” Steve said, nodding back with a small, amused smile on his face, and then he followed you to the car.
You two sat on opposite ends in the backseat, and it was probably the first time all night that the silence between you two felt a little awkward.
“Can I read the text she sent you?” You asked, halfway through the ten-minute ride. “Sorry, if that’s weird, I don’t know why I’m so curious.”
“Not weird,” Steve told you as he tapped on his phone for a second and then handed it over to you.
You took a brief look at the previous messages sent between them, which was a lot of simple stuff, and then you focused on the most recent one.
I’ve been thinking about you a lot today. Maybe we can meet up soon and talk? Let me know when you’re free.
It was hard not to roll your eyes at the message. It felt almost too painstakingly equivalent to something Elliott had said to you the day he moved out of your apartment. His one final attempt to get you to change your mind and move to California with him, as if all the damage to your relationship hadn’t already been done.
You were about to hand Steve his phone back, but then you noticed something.
“Steve,” You said, looking at him in the darkness of the car. “Why is there still a heart by her name?”
“I haven’t gotten around to changing it yet,” He answered, which didn’t sound like the best excuse to you because you thought about how promptly you had changed Elliott’s contact name to “Asshole” once he left the apartment for the final time.
“Alright, let me do the honors for you,” You said as you deleted the red heart and then Monica’s name entirely and simply put “EX.” “Okay, here you go.”
You handed the phone back to him, and he looked at what you did and then laughed a little. “I don’t know why I thought you were gonna make it something a lot meaner.”
“It was tempting,” You started. “But, I don’t know her, so I don’t know what mean stuff would’ve been the most fitting.”
Steve nodded as he slipped his phone back in his pocket. “What’s your ex’s name?”
“Asshole in my contacts and Elliott in real life,” You answered and Steve laughed again and then said a quick, “Got it.”
You made it to your apartment building five minutes later and it took another five minutes, due to very shitty elevators, to make it to your actual apartment.
“Welcome to my place,” You said to Steve as you flicked on the light and then pulled off your jacket and hung it on one of the hooks by the front door, and slipped off your shoes.
“Did you just move in?” Steve asked, following suit and doing the same with his jacket, and then toeing off his shoes by the door as well.
The half-emptiness of your apartment didn’t really faze you anymore, but you understood how unfinished the place looked to someone who was seeing it for the first time.
“Oh, no, I’ve been here for almost three years now. When Elliott moved out, he took a lot of things, so it looks a little weird and half-decorated now,” You quickly explained, hoping that you successfully masked the sudden awkwardness in your voice because you now felt the tiniest bit embarrassed that you brought him here. “I’m still working on getting a new TV, so for now we can just watch something on my laptop if you want.”
Before Steve could say anything in response, you grabbed your laptop from where it sat on the small coffee table in your living room and then handed it over to him. “I’ll be right back; I need to get out of this dress. But you can put on whatever you want.”
“Okay,” You heard him say as you headed toward your bedroom.
It didn’t hit you how sort of insane this entire situation was until you closed your bedroom door behind you, and you were left alone for the first time since you met Steve near the bar bathrooms. Now, logical thinking was kicking in, and you considered just how much of a bad idea all of this was.
There was a guy who you barely knew in your apartment, and you had no plans on having sex with him, so this wouldn’t end up being a one-night stand kind of thing. So, what would happen instead? You two would simply talk and genuinely watch a movie, and then what?
Although you had no idea what the answer to that question was, it actually didn’t completely scare you. Because yes, this was kind of an odd set of circumstances, but you and Steve were going through the same thing, and that somehow made everything feel different. You weren’t nervous around him, and you hadn’t been all night; instead, things had felt weirdly easy, you realized. And you decided to keep leaning into that easy feeling and not overthink whatever this was or would be.
You slipped out of your dress and put on what was probably the most comfortable pair of pajama pants you owned and a simple t-shirt. When you stepped out of your bedroom and headed back into the living room, you saw Steve sitting on the couch, and a small, slightly amused smile tugged at your lips as you noticed what was playing on your laptop, which was opened up and back on the coffee table.
“Okay, I definitely didn’t expect you to put on a nature documentary,” You said as you sat down next to him, leaving a fair amount of space between you two. “I don’t know why I thought you’d put on something super boyish. Like, Die Hard or one of the million Fast and Furious movies.”
“Oh, I was planning on putting on Die Hard after this,” He said, and you immediately took notice of the playful tilt in his voice.
“An ocean documentary and Die Hard sounds like a solid double feature,” You joked back with a smile, and Steve laughed in response and then proceeded to tell you that this documentary was specifically about whales.
A comfortable silence began to linger as you grabbed the throw blanket that was folded on the back of the couch and spread it over your lap and then offered some of it to Steve, which he accepted— it was long enough to fit you both comfortably even though you weren’t right next to each other. And then you focused on the documentary and the Australian narrator talking about the vastness of the ocean.
“We can watch something else if you want,” Steve abruptly said about five minutes in. His words slightly surprised you because you had actually been finding the documentary pretty interesting so far and you hadn’t done anything to show otherwise. “My friends always hate when I put this on.”
You looked away from the laptop screen and at him. “How often do you watch this?”
“Whenever I’m not feeling great,” He answered, turning a little to look at you too. “Like, sick or sad.”
“Okay, and with your breakup, I guess this has been on repeat these past two weeks?” You asked, and the nod he gave you in response made you think that he was embarrassed by that answer, and you immediately wanted to make him not feel that way. “My personal sad go-to has been putting on this one reality show where people do dumb obstacle courses to win money. There’s like twenty seasons of that show and I’m halfway through it.”
“That’s what we should actually watch after this,” Steve said, giving you a playful smile.
“Yeah, and we can wallow in our collective sadness,” You nodded in agreement, which made him laugh. “And this will probably sound weird or just not even make sense, but I’m not even sad about me and him breaking up, because I know that it definitely needed to happen. I’m sad about basically wasting the last two years of my life with someone who didn’t end up being “the one” or whatever. Thinking about that feels so much worse than the breakup itself.”
Steve gave you a look that you couldn’t decipher at all. It was probably the first time all night that you felt slightly self-conscious under his gaze. You got the urge to look away from him and focus back on the whales on screen, but you didn’t.
Instead, your eyebrows furrowed. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Sorry, it’s just, I feel the exact same way pretty much,” He told you. “I’m not really that sad that Monica broke up with me, I just feel really stupid that we were even together in the first place. She didn’t really like my friends and would always make fun of my job.”
“Didn’t you say you work at a record store? What is there to make fun of about that?”
“She would say a lot of stuff about how ‘it’s a job that’s going nowhere,’ but then play it off like she was just joking.”
You were unable to hold back your grimace. “Wow, that sounds terrible.”
You noticed the embarrassed look cross his face and you felt the immediate need to change it.
“Sorry, sorry, I’m not judging,” You quickly told him. “Elliott called me a lot of mean things by the end, and I still stayed with him, so I know all about making dumb decisions in a relationship.”
Steve frowned at your words. “How mean?”
“So mean that you’re actually the first person I’ve even mentioned that to. It still feels way too embarrassing to bring it up to my friends,” You admitted, and it was then that you had to finally look away from him. “I don’t really get why it’s so easy to talk to you.”
“Probably because we’re basically strangers,” Steve said, and after considering his words for a second, you nodded. “And fuck him, by the way, for whatever mean shit he said to you. That sounds pretty terrible too.”
“That’s why I wanted to call him tonight and leave equally as mean drunk voicemails, but you talked me out of it,” You said, finally meeting Steve’s eyes again. “You’re right, though, it would’ve been stupid to do that.”
Steve shook his head. “Oh, when you said that, I thought you meant that you wanted to leave the sappy kind of drunk voicemails where you talk about wanting to get back with him or something.”
“Oh, no way. I was just gonna list off a bunch of bad things about him,” You responded. “Like, the kinds of things that when you’re dating the person, it just seems like a little quirk or bad habit that you can overlook, but in hindsight you’re like, why did I put up with any of that, y’know?”
Steve nodded understandingly. “Can I hear the list?”
“You sure you wanna hear me rant about my ex?” You asked him with an amused smile, and Steve laughed a little and nodded again. “Okay, he would always forget to turn off stuff before he left the apartment; the TV, lights, anything really. He never did the dishes and would always get a little annoyed when I asked him to do it. Oh, and he hated whenever I would beat him at any kind of games.”
“That’s a very solid list.”
“Also, he,” You started and then immediately cut yourself off, realizing that maybe you should have at least somewhat of a filter. “Nevermind, it’s stupid.”
Steve gave you a look. “Wait, now you have to say it.”
“He never…” You looked away from Steve’s curious gaze and instead focused on the blanket draped over your lap. You pulled at a random loose string as you said your next words. “He never went down on me.”
“Really?” He asked, and you simply nodded because it suddenly felt too hard to form words right then. “You were together for almost two years, and he didn’t do it once?”
You nodded again and then finally found your voice. “He said he wasn’t a “fan” of it. Meanwhile, he loved when I gave him a blowjob.”
It was pretty obvious that your filter was completely gone at this point; if it had ever even really been there in the first place when it came to Steve.
“Wow.”
You tilted your head at him. “I can’t tell what that wow means.”
“It means that he’s an idiot and you should’ve been the one dumping him, not the other way around, and also, once again, he’s definitely an idiot.”
You laughed a little. “Woah, who knew one word could mean so much?”
“Yeah, it has a ton of connotations to it,” Steve joked, smiling at you.
You both went back to watching the documentary on your laptop, but there was something about this part of the conversation that didn’t feel over yet. You didn’t feel like you could just go back to watching this whale documentary as if you hadn’t just admitted the most embarrassing thing about your sex life.
“Um, what about you, though?” You asked, and Steve looked at you again, a confused furrow to his eyebrows like he didn’t fully get what you meant by the question, so you elaborated. “What was shitty about your sex life?”
Steve was quiet at first, and for a second, you thought that maybe for the first time that night, you two had reached a question that was “too much,” or worse, there had been nothing bad about his sex life with his ex, so he had no answer to give you.
“Um, she always wanted to do the same thing,” Steve finally answered after what felt like the longest stint of silence ever, and you were completely confused by that response.
“What do you mean?”
“She only wanted to do missionary. Nothing else,” He explained. “And I know that it’s a classic, I get that completely, and it definitely is. But sometimes you just wanna change things up, y’know?”
You nodded instead of outwardly saying anything because you didn’t want to admit that aside from the lack of oral, your sex life with Elliott had been pretty good.
“So, almost a year of just missionary?” You asked, and Steve gave you a nod that seemed equivalent to the one you’d given him when it was you answering this kind of question. “What would you do if you could choose?”
You noticed his cheeks turning the tiniest hint of pink as he considered the question. “Oh, um, girl on top, I think. That one’s pretty good.”
You weren’t sure why you expected him to say something a little crazier, but you didn’t tell him that.
“Good choice,” Was what you said instead.
There was another lull in the conversation, and maybe that was where it should’ve finally ended, but there was something about it that still didn’t feel entirely over just yet.
“I could—”
“We could—”
Your and Steve’s suddenly spoken words stumbled over each other and made you both stop abruptly.
“What were you gonna say?” He asked.
You shook your head. “You can go first.”
“No, no, I’m a gentleman,” Steve told you, a small smile on his face. “So, ladies first.”
You rolled your eyes at him, but there was nothing serious behind it. “I was gonna say that maybe we could… Maybe we could help each other out. Like, show one another what the other was ‘missing out on’ while they were in their relationship.” You then rushed out your next words before Steve could respond to your previous ones. “What were you gonna say?”
“I was gonna say that I could do what your ex didn’t want to do for you.”
“Just me?” You asked, and he nodded. “Well, it wouldn’t be fair if you got nothing out of this.”
Steve gave you a quick shrug. “I wasn’t really thinking about me.”
You teasingly smiled at him. “Wow, you truly are a gentleman.”
He laughed. “I told you.”
“If we did actually do this, though,” You started. “I would also wanna do your thing too.”
“Yeah?”
You nodded. “Yeah. If you go down on me, I’ll happily ride you.”
Finally outwardly saying the words made you laugh a little; you couldn’t help it. None of what was happening right then felt exactly weird, but it was definitely… surprising.
“This is such an insane conversation,” Steve responded, laughing too.
“Oh, yeah, it definitely is,” You said, looking away from him and focusing back on your laptop screen for a second. “We could just go back to watching the documentary and pretend this never happened.”
“Is that what you wanna do?”
“Not really, no,” You admitted. Logically, your answer probably should’ve been the opposite, but you honestly couldn’t imagine saying yes to his previous question and actually pretending that this conversation hadn’t happened. “Do you?”
Steve shook his head. “No.”
“Okay, so it’s settled then. Should we shake on this too?” You asked, mainly joking with your words.
“Yes, definitely,��� He said, playing along. “That’s the only way it will be real.”
You scooted a little closer to him, closing most of the space between you two on the couch, and then held out your hand. “So, deal?”
He grabbed your outstretched hand and shook it. “Deal.”
This was the second handshake shared between you two, but this one felt charged with something different than the one outside the bar.
Steve’s hand was warm against yours, and you were also noticing how soft it was too. Your eyes stayed on his, and even though you didn’t really know him that well, if at all, you still felt as if you somehow understood what was going on in his head because it matched exactly what was happening in yours.
With your hands still linked together, he pulled you closer, and then let go at the last second to find your cheek and slot his lips against yours. It was messy at first, a sudden clash of tongues and teeth, but it also felt really good, and it took only a second for you two to find your collective rhythm.
Steve was a great kisser, which surprised you because first kisses with people were never this good, and they definitely never felt this right. There were always some sort of growing pains as you navigated what to do and figured out what the other wanted, but that somehow wasn’t the case for you and Steve.
You definitely didn’t expect your first post-Elliott kiss to be damn near perfect, and you decided not to think too much about what exactly it meant that it was happening with Steve; a guy you’d barely known for two hours.
“You’re really good at this,” You mumbled against his lips.
“What? Kissing?” He whispered back in between each one.
“Yeah.”
Steve pulled back to look at you, a small, amused smile playing on his lips. “Thanks. You’re really good too.”
You suddenly started feeling shy under his gaze, so you quickly leaned back in to get him to stop looking at you so sweetly. His hand still holding your cheek kept you steady and further warmed your already burning skin, and you let out the softest sound against his mouth when his free hand slipped beneath your shirt and found your waist, giving the bare skin a quick squeeze.
You wanted to move out of this awkward side-by-side position and sit in his lap, but you also wanted to get off the couch completely, so you abruptly pulled away from him and stood up. Wordlessly, your hand found Steve’s again, and you led him to your bedroom.
The second the door was closed behind you both, Steve’s mouth eagerly found yours again, which made you smile into the kiss, as he walked you back toward the bed. The second the backs of your knees hit the foot of the bed, he gently pushed you down on top of it.
Before he could even ask or say anything, you were pulling your t-shirt off and tossing it somewhere to the side, and then doing the same with your pajama pants. The look he gave you as you now lay on your bed, half naked with only your bra and underwear on, made something stir in your stomach.
“You okay up there?” You asked after a moment, making your voice light and playful, and also trying to push away the feelings that were starting to make a home in your stomach.
“Yeah, I’m fine, it’s just… Fuck,” He let out a breath. “You’re really pretty.”
You had to turn your head and look away from him then, but you still couldn’t help but smile at his words as your cheek pressed into the blanket.
This was just supposed to be another case of two people helping each other out. This wasn’t supposed to be so sweet and nice and serious, right? You weren’t sure, but you could inwardly admit that you liked hearing him call you pretty.
You still weren’t looking, but you could feel Steve settle on top of you and lean in to press his lips to your exposed neck, making you let out a quiet moan.
He sucked on your skin, a sensitive spot on the underside of your jaw that had you mewling for him, as his hand moved down toward your cunt. He pulled your underwear to the side and slowly pressed his middle finger into your slick folds.
“Shit,” He mumbled against your neck. “You’re soaked.”
You let out a soft breath. “Like I said, you’re really good at this.”
He pulled away from your clit and out of your wetness completely and you let out a whine in protest, but then his fingers were hooking into the waistband of your underwear and dragging them down your legs. Your bra was next, and you sat up a bit so that he could unhook it and toss it to the side.
“Fuck,” Steve said, leaning back to simply just look at you for a moment. “You look so perfect for me.”
You were completely naked now, and he was still fully clothed, but you didn’t even feel shy under his lust-filled gaze because you really liked the way he was looking at you in this moment.
Before you could make any move to grab at the ends of his t-shirt to at least pull that off of him, his mouth was on you once again, pressing a quick kiss to your lips and then moving to your neck and continuing lower and lower.
Your eyes slipped shut, and you let out the softest sounds as he slowly trailed down your stomach and went to your hips and then to your inner thighs, teasingly pressing his mouth against your warm skin at every spot. You felt his hands hook around your thighs and pull you closer to him.
“Hey,” Steve said to grab your attention, and your eyes met his. Looking at him with his head between your legs and his mouth so close to where you needed him to be was probably the hottest thing you’d ever seen. “Tell me if you want me to do anything differently, okay?”
You nodded before softly saying, “Okay.”
Your head fell back against the bed when his tongue ran a long slow stripe up your slit. He stopped at your clit, circling the bundle of nerves before latching his lips around it and giving it a quick suck. The gasp in pleasure and surprise you let out in response was immediate.
After one too many rejections from Elliott, you told yourself that you didn’t like oral anyway, always reminding yourself of other times with past partners when it had been rushed and sloppy. But now you knew just how much you’d been lying to yourself because this felt fucking phenomenal. Steve’s mouth felt perfect on you, and there was nothing about this moment that felt rushed or half-baked, like he was just trying to quickly get to the next thing.
He slipped two fingers inside of you, pushing in as deep as he could go and his mouth went to your clit again. Your fingers threaded through his hair as he lapped at the sensitive bundle of nerves. Steve could tell just how much you were enjoying yourself with every tug on his hair and the contented sounds you were making above him.
His hand still on your thigh squeezed roughly as he started to suck hard on your clit, which pushed you closer and closer to the edge. It should’ve maybe felt a little embarrassing— how quickly he was about to make you come only from his mouth and fingers— but everything just felt so fucking good that you didn’t care how fast he was making the tight knot in your stomach feel as if it was going to explode.
“Steve, I- I’m gonna… Fuck,” You trailed off with a loud moan. Words were alluding in this moment as Steve continued his ministrations against your dripping cunt; his mouth on the most sensitive part of you and his fingers deep inside you, curling against an almost too perfect spot.
Your own fingers pulled a little harder at his dark locks, which made him moan against your clit and the vibrations from that abruptly sent you over the edge.
“I’m coming, I’m coming,” The words fell from your lips in a sort of whispered chant as your back arched sharply off the bed and you saw stars behind your eyes.
Steve continued exactly what he was doing as you came, your moans and whimpers sounding like music to his ears. He happily took and lapped at everything you gave him, absolutely loving the taste of you on his tongue. He continued to finger you and eat you out through your orgasm until he felt you become too overstimulated.
“Fuck,” You squeaked out when his tongue did one final teasing lick against the sensitive bundle of nerves. “Fuck, that was really good.”
Steve pulled away, and he sat up a little, smiling as he watched you come down from your high. “I’m sorry you’ve had to miss out on that for the past two years.”
You let out a breath of a laugh. “Thank you for the condolences.”
Your heart rate slowly returned to normal, and you turned to Steve, who was now sitting next to you, and you took notice of the obvious tint in his jeans.
You reached out to palm his hard length. “Girl on top is what you wanted, right?”
He let out a low groan. “Mhm, yeah, but only if you want to do that.”
“Steve,” You said so his eyes would meet yours, and then you proceeded to give him the reassurance that it seemed so clear that he needed. “I really want to do that for you.”
He looked at you so sweetly, and this time you didn’t look away, you simply just smiled back at him as you crawled into his lap.
Your fingers immediately grabbed the ends of his t-shirt to pull it up and off of him. “Let’s make things even, yeah?”
He nodded, and you shifted back a bit so that you could work on the button of his jeans. You then lifted your hips so that he could push his jeans and boxers down his legs and off him completely.
Your eyes became glued to his hard cock. You didn’t really know what you were expecting, but he was huge and you could feel yourself becoming wetter at the thought of him filling you up.
“You have such a pretty cock, Steve,” You whispered as you wrapped a hand around him and brushed your thumb over his slick tip. He groaned in pleasure, and one of his hands immediately found your hip in response, squeezing the bare skin.
A part of you wanted him to be rougher; you honestly didn’t mind the thought of finding Steve-shaped bruises on your skin in the morning. However, you didn’t tell him that because this moment wasn’t about you.
“Does that feel good?” You asked instead, voice soft and gentle, as if you couldn’t tell the answer to your question just by all the sounds Steve was making and by the way he was twitching in your hand.
“Perfect,” He groaned out, eyes meeting yours just for a second before he was looking down and watching as you kept slowly stroking him from base to tip. “Fucking perfect.”
You smiled and wondered if this was how he felt when the roles were reversed and you were the one who was a mess below him.
“Shit, I need,” Steve let out a strangled breath and his head fell back against the headboard with a soft thud. “Really need to be inside of you.”
You nodded, even though he wasn’t looking at you, and let go of him to reach over and grab a condom from your nightstand drawer.
Steve watched as you tore open the foil packet and slipped the condom on his cock; it was probably one of the hottest things he’d ever seen.
“Do you want me to turn around and take it that way, or like, how do you want this?” You asked, meeting his half lidded eyes as you went back to stroking his cock. After what he’d just done for you, you wanted this to be perfect for him.
“No, I wanna see you,” He said, free hand coming up to gently stroke your cheek.
You could feel your skin warm under his touch; somehow, that felt like the most intimate thing he’d done to you so far tonight. You nodded at his words instead of saying anything because you were pretty certain your words would’ve failed you anyway.
You lifted your hips so that you could line him up with your slick entrance and then your eyes met his as you slowly lowered yourself onto him, completely taking his cock inside of you.
Your and Steve’s collective moans filled the quiet air, and you were the one to break eye contact with him because your eyes were pinching shut.
Both of his hands shot to your hips to keep you from moving, which was good because you needed a moment to adjust to the feeling of being so full of him.
“Shit, I’m gonna fucking explode if you move right now,” Steve mumbled, looking down at how well you were taking him.
“That’s okay,” You told him softly. Your hands rested on his shoulders for a quick moment, and then they tangled in the hair at the nape of his neck.
He let out a chuckle and met your gaze. “I want this to last more than two seconds.” One of his hands came up to find your breast. “And I also want you to come with me.”
You hummed at the feeling of his fingers squeezing your already hard nipple. “Still such a gentleman.”
Steve laughed again, and that sound turned into a low groan when you lifted your hips ever so slightly and then sank back down onto him.
“God, you feel so good,” He rambled out. “Taking me so fucking well.”
His words sent a jolt of pleasure through your body. “‘M so full.”
“Yeah?” Steve asked teasingly, and you simply nodded, words failing you the moment he pushed up into you.
Whatever control you had was lost. You were technically riding him, but he was doing most of the work, and it seemed as if that was exactly what he wanted. He had a near-bruising grip on your hips as he guided your movements and hit all of the right places with each thrust.
Your face became buried in his neck when it all felt like too much. “Fuck, I’m so close.”
Your words were whispered against his soft skin, and you could feel his nod in response. “Yeah, me too.”
He slipped a hand between your bodies so that he could find your clit and you sucked in a breath when his thumb started circling it.
“I wanna see you,” He groaned when he felt you clench around his cock, and at first all you could do was hum against his skin in response. “I wanna see you come for me.”
You pulled back and met his gaze, hands finding his bare shoulders to keep you steady. It was harder to do than you expected because of how much you wanted to let your eyes slip shut and simply just take everything Steve was giving you.
“Hi,” You softly said to him instead of closing your eyes or letting your head fall back in pleasure due to his teasing strokes against your clit.
“Hi,” He gave you a smile that made your stomach flutter and his hand on your hip pulled you harder against his cock. “You gonna come for me?”
You could only moan in response and give him a meek nod, forcing your eyes to stay on his. The knot in your stomach was tightening and tightening, almost ready to completely unravel.
“Go ahead,” He said as he thrusted up into you. “Let go.”
“Ah,” You dug your nails into his shoulders the second your orgasm hit you. He looked at you so fondly, like he truly cared about making you feel good, and that only made you come harder, walls fluttering around his cock.
You once again buried your face in the crook of his neck, sucking the skin and leaving red marks that would be there later. You landed on what you would later realize was an especially sensitive spot on his neck because the second your tongue grazed over it, Steve was letting out a loud moan and spilling into the condom.
“Fuck,” He muttered as he came and his hands squeezed your hips to keep you firmly planted on his cock.
You pulled away from his neck to watch him come apart beneath you. It was probably the prettiest thing you'd ever seen— his blown-out pupils, his mouth slightly parted in a moan, and a few locks of his messy hair falling against his forehead.
Your and his movements slowed as you both came down from your highs. With his hands still on you, he shifted things so that you two were lying sideways on the bed. His softening cock slipped out of you in the process and you couldn’t help but quietly whine at the feeling.
You two became a tangle of limbs and warm bodies, and your arms circled around his neck to push yourself even closer to him.
“Was that good for you?” You asked, soft words hitting right against his ear. “You did like all of the work when it should’ve been the opposite.”
His fingers began mindlessly stroking the bare skin of your back. “No, that was really good.”
“Mm,” You hummed in response. “Okay, but it does slightly feel like I ended up getting a better outcome to the deal than you.”
Steve let out a laugh at your playful words as he pulled away from you, and it took a lot of willpower to not protest his actions and keep him close to you. He pointed at a door, silently asking if that was where the bathroom was, and you nodded in response and he headed in.
You got up from your bed and started picking up the clothes that had been haphazardly thrown around the room. You slipped on your t-shirt and underwear, and when Steve emerged from the bathroom, you handed him his shirt and boxers.
It almost felt a little comical remembering that when you first let Steve into your apartment, you inwardly told yourself that you weren’t gonna have sex with him, and this wouldn’t turn into a one-night stand type of situation.
And now here you two were.
However, weirdly enough, the thought of this moment following the typical one-night stand rules— Steve leaving right now and you two never seeing each other again— didn’t sit right with you.
“Have you really not seen Home Alone 2 before?” You asked Steve as he finished slipping on his t-shirt. The talk of that movie had been such a minor moment in the conversation at the bar earlier, but still, you remembered him mentioning it.
“No, I haven’t,” He answered.
“Me neither, actually,” You told him. Christmas movies had never really been your favorites. “Do you maybe wanna watch it now?”
You knew what your words meant— that you didn’t want him to leave yet, that you wanted him to stay a little longer— and he understood that too.
He gave you a small smile and nodded. “Okay. And this is probably the best time to also admit that I’ve never seen the first one either.”
You let out a laugh as you headed into your living room, where your laptop was still playing the documentary from earlier, and Steve followed right behind you. “Okay, double feature it is, then.”
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
let me know your thoughts<333
#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington smut#steve harrington fic#steve harrington fluff#steve harrington x fem!reader#steve harrington x you#steve harrington imagine
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COUNTING HER FRECKLES
Vi x f!reader
Synopsis: Early in the morning, while Vi was still asleep and you had just woken up, you couldn’t help but notice the little constellations of freckles on Vi’s face.
The morning sunlight spilled through the half-closed curtains, painting the room in a soft, golden glow. The warmth of the blankets cocooned you, but it was the woman lying next to you that truly kept you rooted in place. Vi was sprawled out on her back, an arm slung over her head, her mouth slightly open as she snored faintly. A tiny trail of drool glittered at the corner of her lips, and you couldn’t help the smile that tugged at your own.
You rolled onto your side, propping your head up with one hand. Her freckled cheeks were kissed by the sunlight, and her crimson hair stuck up in every direction. Even like this,unfiltered, messy, unguarded, she was stunning. Maybe even more so.
Carefully, you reached out to trace the faintest of lines across her skin, stopping short of touching her. “One, two, three…” you whispered under your breath, counting the constellation of freckles on her nose. You had no idea how she got freckles with her pale skin and constant yet humorous scowl, but you were grateful for them.
“Mmm…” Vi stirred, her head tilting slightly toward the sound of your voice. Her lashes fluttered, though her eyes stayed shut. A soft, groggy smile tugged at her lips, and she slurred, “Y’doin’, babe?”
You bit your lip to stifle a laugh. “Counting your freckles. Shh, don’t move. You’ll mess up my math.”
“Math?” she mumbled, her voice hoarse with sleep. “It’s too early for math,” She cracked an eye open, peering at you with a mix of confusion and amusement. “Y’always this weird?”
“Always,” you replied, grinning. “You’re lucky you’re cute when you’re drooling.”
Her brows furrowed, and she quickly wiped at her mouth with the back of her hand, grumbling incoherently. “Don’t call it that…” Her pout was impossibly endearing.
“You’re right,” you teased, brushing a strand of hair off her forehead. “It’s not drooling. It’s aggressive hydration.”
Vi snorted, her laughter muffled by the pillow as she turned her face into it. “Stop, you’re killin’ me,” she groaned, though her hand reached out to curl around your waist, pulling you closer. “Lemme sleep.”
“You’re already awake,” you pointed out, though you didn’t resist when she tucked you against her chest. Her body was warm, her heartbeat a steady rhythm under your cheek.
“Not awake,” she mumbled. “Just resting my eyes.”
You ran your fingers up and down her arm, tracing the scarred skin there. “Your snoring says otherwise.”
Vi groaned again, this time more dramatically. “Why do you hate me?”
“I don’t,” you said softly, pressing a kiss to her collarbone. “I like you like this. All soft and sleepy and human.”
“Not soft,” she muttered, though her grip on you tightened. “I’m tough. Real tough.”
“Sure, babe,” you said, hiding your smile against her skin. “Super tough.”
Her only response was a low, contented hum as she drifted back into a half-sleep. You stayed like that, counting her freckles in your head and savoring the rare moment of peace. The world could wait a little while longer. For now, it was just you and her, tangled together in the soft light of morning.
And honestly? You wouldn’t have it any other way.
A/N: I know this is extremely short but I found it in my notes and thought I should post it (just a cute one shot).
#vi x you#vi x reader#vi x reader fanfic#vi fanfic#vi#vi arcane#arcane vi#arcane fanfic#arcane#lesbian fanfic#lesbian#fluffy fanfic#fluff#comfort fanfic#comfort#sweet fanfic#sweet#fanfic#fanfic writing#one shot#oneshot
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good for you

summary: your boyfriend is literally perfect and treats you like a princess but you want him to completely lose control 😇 pairing: mingyu x reader genre: smut, tooth-rotting fluff warnings: established relationship, home intruder roleplay, consensual somnophilia, safeword exists but isn't used, rough sex, no lube, no protection, neck biting, size kink (no one is surprised), titty slapping, sir kink, spanking, praise+degradation, slight dumbification, subspace, pet names, shy dom gyu, crying, mentions of pee (non-sexual context), aftercare!!! word count: 1.7k
You and Mingyu have not been together for long but from what you know so far he’s the sweetest guy you’ve ever dated. He treats you like a princess, brings you flowers or chocolates with or without occasion, drives you around everywhere, gets stuff from the top shelf for you and is basically the kindest soul to ever step on this Earth. You are, of course, beyond grateful for that, and do your best to show him how much you appreciate him every chance you get.
However, a little demon inside your brain kind of wants him to not treat you as if you are made of glass all the time. While the sex is great and Mingyu makes sure that you reach an orgasm, you can’t help but fantasize about him going rough on you. Even when his friends tease (bully) him, he almost never uses his height and strength to his advantage, instead accepting everything with a good-natured smile.
But you would be lying if you said that the idea of him just snapping doesn’t excite you. Nevertheless, you are not sure how to bring this up to him. You don’t want to sound ungrateful or for him to feel insecure about his abilities because he’s perfect the way he is. It’s your filthy brain that needs fixing. Still, you decide that honesty is the key to a healthy relationship and you gather all your courage to approach him about this.
“Hey, Mingyu, can we talk about something?” you ask one evening after you two have finished having dinner.
His eyes are immediately filled with worry. Judging by the tone of your voice, this is something serious. So far, your relationship has been lighthearted and devoid of any problems. Mingyu thinks that it’s going great but apparently he’s been fooling himself.
“What’s wrong?” he wants to know. “You’re not breaking up with me, right?”
“What?! Of course not! Do you want to break up with me?” you panic.
“No, no, please,” Mingyu shakes his head fervently.
“Good, good,” you exhale in relief.
“So, what did you wanna talk about?”
“Um, it’s kinda embarrassing but I don’t want to keep any secrets from you.”
“Secrets?” Mingyu blinks in curiosity.
“Yeah…You know how you’re always super gentle with me, both outside and inside the bedroom?”
“Uh, sure? What about it?”
“Can you consider…not doing that all the time?”
“In what sense?” Mingyu raises his eyebrows in confusion.
“In the sense that…can you fuck me harder without holding yourself back? You’re not gonna break me, I promise.”
“Oh…” he finally realizes what you’re getting at. Because he doesn’t say anything rightaway, you hurry to explain.
“Not that I don’t like how sweet and patient you are with me! It’s more than amazing, I just thought that…maybe it’d be fun to try something new. If it’s not your thing, forget I mentioned it, I’m so-“
“It’s not that it doesn’t sound appealing. But I’m afraid that if I’m not holding myself back, I’ll end up hurting you,” Mingyu confesses, surprising you.
You reach your hand out across the table to hold his comfortingly.
“You won’t. I know how caring you are, Mingyu. Which is why I would trust you with something like this. Okay?”
“Okay,” he nods. “Did you have a particular scenario in mind or do you want me to surprise you?”
“Surprise me.”
Mingyu smirks sinisterly. Oh God. What kind of demon have you unleashed?
🎀🎀🎀
A few days later, you receive a text from Mingyu while you’re walking home.
Mingyu: Busy tonight?
You: All yours
Mingyu: Unlock your door at exactly 10pm and wait for me in your bed. If I’m not there by 10:30, lock it again, alright?
You: Yes, sir 🛐
Mingyu: That’s my good girl.
Fucking hell. Your heart flutters upon reading these words. He’s called you that before but in this context, it thrills you even more than usual.
Mingyu: Safeword is butterfly. Use it if something is too much, if you’re in pain or for any other reason that brings you discomfort, okay?
You: I’m gonna need a safeword?!?!
Mingyu: I hope it doesn’t come to that but just in case. See you in a couple of hours, baby.
You’re too excited for tonight. You take a long shower. You wear your prettiest lingerie and make your room as cozy as possible. Not that it matters. You spray perfume over your neck and wrists. You put on some lipbalm and mascara. You want to look good for him. But the truth is, you had an exhausting week and already feel sleepy. You unlock the door at 10pm, climb into your bed and…
Somehow you fall asleep. You feel disoriented as your consciousness is slowly returning to you. You feel too hot, too weak and too full. Fuck. What’s going on? You don’t dare to open your eyes for fear of ruining the sweeter than sleep reality.
“Dumb baby couldn’t wait for me and fell asleep all by herself?” Mingyu’s deep voice coos in your ear.
In your half-awake state you feel your boyfriend’s cock thrusting deep inside of you, taking you rougher than ever before. Well, you asked for it.
“So cute and helpless, leaving the door unlocked for anyone to enter and use you like a whore,” Mingyu murmurs.
He rubs your clit vigorously while still fucking into you, making you wetter than ever before.
“Nnghh,” you whimper drowsily.
“Shhh, baby, go back to sleep,” Mingyu whispers. “I’ll take care of you. You don’t have to think about anything.”
He squeezes your boobs, leaning down to bite your neck like a hungry wolf. And here, you thought your boyfriend was just a cute puppy.
“S-so big,” you cry out pitifully.
“You can take it, slut,” Mingyu says confidently.
You don’t offer a verbal response but your body speaks for itself. Mingyu is almost splitting you in two but your pussy is swallowing him up greedily.
“H-harder, p-please,” your mouth seems to have a mind of its own because it speaks against any common sense.
Mingyu slaps your tits, a little hesitant at first.
It stings but it’s such a sweet hurt you’re already addicted to it.
“Like this?” he asks, making sure it’s okay.
“M-more,” you beg, forgetting all inhibitions. “Use me.”
He does it a couple of more times, while still fucking you roughly. His dick is so enormous that you’re certain you’ll be sore tomorrow but it will be more than worth it. You lose count of how many times you’ve come around his cock. Sliding out and flipping you on your belly, he takes you from behind, too, spanking your ass and gripping your hair.
“Such a good girl, just for me, right? No one else gets to see you like this, yeah?” Mingyu’s words come out rushed, almost in trance.
“All yours, sir,” you promise.
Mingyu seems satisfied with your answer because he spills his seed inside of you seconds after. You follow his lead and eventually, your knees give out, your mind goes blank and you collapse on the bed.
“Baby?” Mingyu checks up on you worriedly.
You are not capable of responding, brain barely functioning anymore. He moves you gently to see your face. Your eyes are open but unblinking, which scares the shit out of him.
“Come back to me, my sweetheart, please,” Mingyu cries out, hugging you tightly.
A couple of moments later, you still don’t remember your own name but something more important to you leaves your lips:
“Mingyu?” you whisper cautiously.
“Oh, angel,” Mingyu sighs. “I’m right here.”
Then, you suddenly burst into tears. Overwhelmed by how good he made you feel and how much he cares about you, your emotions fully take over.
“What’s wrong, baby? Did I hurt you?” Mingyu positions you so that you are sitting on his knee and rocks you gently back and forth.
“N-no,” you shake your head. “I’m s-so happy.”
“You poor thing,” Mingyu chuckles softly. “Can’t believe you worked so hard to doll yourself up and make the room smell nice. You knew I was gonna ruin your lingerie anyway, didn’t you?”
“I just wanted to look good for you,” you admit with a pout.
“You always do. My best girl,” Mingyu kisses you sweetly and wraps you in his warm embrace, lulling you back to sleep.
🎀🎀🎀
The next morning, you wake up to the feeling of wanting to pee so badly. You manage to climb out of bed but barely make one step and trip on the ground. Uh oh. You got fucked so good you literally can’t walk.
Awakened by the loud thud, Mingyu is by your side in no time.
“What happened?”
“You happened,” you reply truthfully, but you don’t blame him because you brought this upon yourself.
“Oh…” Mingyu understands what you mean. “Did you want to use the toilet?”
“Uh, yeah. Gosh, this is so mortifying.”
You cover your face with your hands.
“I was literally deep inside of you a few hours ago, get over yourself,” Mingyu laughs and lifts you up effortlessly, carrying you to the bathroom.
“Are you gonna stare at me?!” you ask in embarrassment.
“Might as well,” he laughs but gives you some privacy, even though there is no need to be shy after all the things you’ve done together.
After that, he insists on doing everything for you. You tell him you are perfectly capable of brushing your own teeth but nope, Mingyu wants to do that, as well. And honestly? It feels too good to reject.
He even makes breakfast and brings it to bed so you can share it together. As you take the first bite and drink the first sip of coffee for the morning, the feelings come crashing once again. And you start crying even harder than last night.
“Oh, baby, what is it?” Mingyu wants to know, as he brushes your hair behind your ear and wipes your tears.
“N-nothing, you’re just so amazing and kind I feel extremely touched.”
“You do realize this is literally the bare minimum, right?” Mingyu seems shocked. He just made pancakes. It’s not some heroic act, in his humble opinion.
“It’s so rare to find a lovely guy like you, though,” you admit.
“Well, my good girl deserves only the best,” he smiles shyly and kisses your cheek.
You wrap your arms around his neck, grinning wider than ever before.
“Keep talking like that and I’ll want to be good for you forever.”
“I’m counting on it.”
The End
#seventeen#mingyu#svt scenarios#seventeen smut#mingyu smut#seventeen scenarios#mingyu x reader#svt imagines#seventeen imagines#kim mingyu#mingyu imagines#mingyu scenarios#svt hard hours#seventeen hard hours#seventeen x reader#writing
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abu dhabi- o.piastri



summary: your first season as an f1 driver doesn't start the best, and you quickly realise McLaren doesn't like women very much. On top of that, your race engineer is as smug as the rest of them, and you have to deal with him all the time.
pairing: race engineer! oscar piastri x f1driver! fem! reader
warnings: lots of misogyny, lando is an asshole in this, illusions to ed behaviour, reader is not in a good head space, all of mclaren is super sexist, mentions of crashes and injuries.
a/n: thank you all very much for your patience, this series means a lot to me and I've had a lot of personal stuff going on, so I felt bad for leaving you guys hanging for a bit. Thank you all so much for reading this series and I hope you guys enjoy this as much as I love writing it!
part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven | part eight | part nine | part ten | part eleven | part twelve
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Abu Dhabi. World Drivers Champion. World Constructors Champions.
Holy shit.
All those years of hard work, of giving up being a child, of giving up having friends or family. You’d done it. You were a winner.
You jumped out of the car and ran straight to Oscar, jumping in his arms. He caught you (of course) and cheered with you.
“You fucking did it!” he smiled, pulling your helmet off. “You did it!”
Every emotion flooded through you, but one in particular stood out; gratefulness.
You were grateful for Oscar, for how he treated you, for who he was. He was there for you through everything, he helped you whenever he could, and while yes, you had a rough start, in the end you couldn’t imagine F1 without Oscar in it.
“Thank you, Osc, for everything,” you smiled, hugging him close.
“Anytime. Whenever. Always,” he nodded.
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He was drunk as fuck, but he was still watching you as you chatted with various team members.
“You’re fucked, aren’t you?” Lando chuckled, joining his side.
Oscar rolled his eyes. “I’m drunk, yes.”
“No. You’re fucked for her,” Lando pointed twoards you. Perfect, unreachable, you.
“Yes,” he nodded, frowning. “I’m fucked for her.”
“It’s pretty clear.”
“I know it is,” Oscar scoffed. “Thanks for Baku, by the way.”
Lando sighed. “Look, I’ve said a lot of shit this season that I didn’t mean, and I’m sorry I was a dick to the two of you. It wasn’t right and I do feel bad about it. So, I’m sorry.”
“Thank you, but that doesn’t solve the fact that she’s being this mysterious weirdo and acting really into me and then really not,” Oscar whined.
“She’s a very broken person-”
“You think?” Oscar rolled his eyes. “You’re not exactly giving me much hope right now.”
Lando laughed at his drunk state. “Just talk to her,” he offered. “She listens to you no matter what.”
Oscar stared at him, then nodded. “Good idea!” he announced (a little too loud as it drew the attention of a few people around the two of them), and looked at you. But you weren’t there. Oscar frowned again.
“You’ll find her before the end of the night, I’m sure you will,” Lando clapped a hand on his shoulder and passed him a bottle of water to sober him up. “Good luck.”
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Oscar had decided to go find you, he wanted to talk. On the way there, he’d acquired about three more drinks and pissed off a small group of other McLaren employees by spilling one of his three drinks and apologised profusely (albeit rather mumbly), and that’s when you came in with a hand on his shoulder and a gentle smile that brushed it all over.
“Are you alright?” you asked him, taking him to a corner to look him over.
“Y/n?” he questioned, his vision blurry. “Is that you?”
You chuckled. “Yeah, it’s me buddy, you alright?”
He nodded, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you in for a hug. “I’m so proud of you.”
“I’m proud of you too, Osc, come on, we get you to bed?” you offered, pulling one of his arms over your shoulder and helping him walk.
“Bed sounds good,” he nodded, allowing you to walk him to his room.
Drunk Oscar was what you assumed three year olds acted like. He pressed every button in the lift, ding-dong ditched people in the hallway, and stripped (almost) naked the second he got in the door of his room. After a few minutes of being in his room, he decided it was a good time to puke his guts out in the toilet, and you, being the good samaritan you are, decided to stay with him.
“Feeling any better?” you asked, putting a cold cloth on his head as he lay in bed. You sat beside him, holding his hand.
He shook his head, his eyes closed and a grimace on his lips. “Shit.”
You chuckled lightly. “You’ll feel better in the morning.”
He opened his eyes and stared into yours, his hand resting over your hand. And time (as it always did when he was looking at you like that) stopped. The world melted away, and it didn’t matter that it was 2 in the morning, or that he’d just vomited, or that all of this was a lot more confusing than either of you had anticipated. You two just got to be with each other, and that was enough for the both of you.
“Why don’t you love me?” he asked, his voice small and raw. He spoke to you with all the care in the world, but you could see he was hurting. You were hurting him.
Fuck. Why couldn’t any of this be easy? Why couldn’t you just… talk to him? Confess to him? Be normal? The boy you love was sitting there in front of you telling you he loved you and you just… froze for a moment. You took a deep breath. “Osc, of course I love you,” you whispered. “But you shouldn’t love me. I wouldn’t be any good for you.”
“I don’t care-”
“You’d end up hating me-”
“I could never hate you,” he shook his head, reaching a hand up to cup your cheek. “I could never hate you.”
And you believed him. That was the scary part. You believed him when he told you he loved you. You believed him when he said he cares. You believed him when he said you look beautiful. You believed him when he said he wouldn’t hate you. “You should,” you whispered, tears forming in your eyes.
“I couldn’t,” he whispered back, a soft smile on his face. He wiped away a tear that fell. “I don’t want you to be scared of how you feel.”
“I don’t want to hurt you,” your voice broke. “I’m not an easy person to love.”
“I disagree,” he chuckled, wiping every tear away. “I find it’s as easy as breathing.”
And you couldn’t take it anymore. You curled up beside him and sobbed. You didn’t know how long you’d done it for, but you woke up beside him, the steady rise and fall of his chest against your head giving you something to ground yourself to. You remembered every moment of last night, every word he said, and everything you said.
You just hoped he wouldn’t.
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When Oscar woke up, he knew there was something he had asked you last night, but he couldn’t remember what. After his conversation with Lando, there was nothing else he really remembered, apart from the fact that you had brought him up to his room, and he pieced together that he’d probably asked you to stay (being the pathetic hopeless romantic he is), and that’s why you were in his bed.
A few seconds after waking up, the hangover hit, and fuck it was bad. His entire body ached.
“I’m never drinking again,” he groaned, his voice hoarse.
You chuckled beside him. “Remember anything?”
He sighed, turning to meet your eyes. “Nope.”
As much as that destroyed you, you knew it was for the better. Oscar was better off without you, that, you knew for sure. But, you also couldn't put aside the confession he'd made last night. “I find it’s as easy as breathing.” It played in your head over and over again, like a mantra that made every negative thought in your head silent for a few seconds. Oscar was good at that, making you question yourself. Either way, you were glad he hadn't remembered. It was for the better, right?
There was a split second where he could’ve sworn he saw a flash of disappointment in your eyes, but it was gone as quickly as it was there, replaced with a smile. “Well, let’s go back to Monaco.”
He groaned just thinking about facing the day, but the fact that he woke up next to you meant it was better than any day he’d ever had.
He definitely needed to know what he asked you last night. And you definitely needed him to not find out.
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I met them, and now I’m their queen!
Pairing: Steve Rogers x F!Reader x Bucky Barnes | Stucky x F!Reader Warnings: Fluff | Language | Hot supersoldiers alert | Clingy supersoldiers | We've got game supersoldiers | Protective and borderline obsessive | Wet thoughts | Allusions to hot nights | Slight angst but happy ending | Confession | Friends to Lovers trope | Poly relation | Long one ~5k | Written in a feverish haze. Any, I mean, any craziness can and will be blamed on deliriously Nyquiled-mind! Lemme know if I'm missing anything. A/N: It really started with, "Let's write a drabble," and well, IT DID NOT end up being a drabble! But blame the two hot super soldier specimens for taking reins and striding through dominantly. This was supposed to be published (along with three other fics) on New Year's, but times have been testing! Anyhoo, Sydney and I—ever indulgently—worked ourselves up with some ideas and this burgeoned, and we both decided to collaborate having similar title and prompt. Inspiration: — confession to get it off their chest before the new year starts Read Sydney's I met them, and now I'm their princess and smother her story with love and affection! Forever grateful to Sydney for giving me the push to publish this and for giving this long-ass fic a read while I was sick and whiny! @buck-star Also, if there are any Windows 11 users, do you know an easy way of typing the em dash (Alt+0151 is no longer an option) Every time I have to use, I have to copy and paste and it's been a pain in my butt. So, any shortcuts would be a great help! Note: Do not Steal, Copy, or Plagiarize any part of my work! Banner credits to me. Picture credits to internet! Divider credits to @buck-star Thank you :) Check out my other works: Masterlist
Indulge Away!
'Have you been Naughty or Nice?'
I've been disastrous. You thought, snorting, looking at the quite colorful, only-for-adult-eyes kind of a poster.
While walking briskly to the truck in the parking lot, your eyes inadvertently fell on the shirtless guy with a Santa hat and red trousers posing sultrily. The show had been for Christmas Eve, now nearly a week old. Lucky patrons!
And your useless, absolutely horny mind brought images of two rugged, burly-looking muscular supersoldiers adorning the costume, and you shuddered.
Nope. No. No. Do not go there.
*Thud*
The distant sound startled you, and you looked down the deserted street but found nothing. You became aware of your surroundings and realized you were standing before a shady-looking strip club. Heart pounding, you hurried toward the truck you'd parked at the end of the street.
The local hill town was vastly different from NYC. By 8 p.m., the main street was completely vacant; the local stores were all closed for the night except for the convenience store at the gas station on the end of the main street and a local vet hospital, both of which you paid a visit tonight.
You quickly got into the truck and navigated out of the small town towards your temporary abode, decked in the woods near the lake.
It was New Year's Eve, and the entire day's theme was a series of unfortunate events and bad decisions.
Earlier that afternoon, having used up all the leftovers, takeouts, and groceries, you decided to venture out to find food. You cursed yourself for being so pathetic and unplanned. It was a hard bet you'd find a store open today or tomorrow.
You should have planned better, but it was what it was, and your poor mind couldn't possibly think logically when it was going through so much. So, forgiving yourself, you decided to drive to the town, hoping to get something to stock up the tiny kitchen for the next couple of days before you can go grocery shopping like a responsible adult.
But lo and behold, you had a flat tire. After groaning and cursing at your fate for a whole three minutes, you realize your aunt mentioned that you could take her truck around if it's still working.
You grabbed the keys and went to the garage. The truck seemed in good condition, with no flat tires. GREAT! You tried to start, but it won't budge. The check engine light blinked red.
Upon further inspection, you realized the spark plug was out and saw a pair of them in a cabby on the metal rack. You weighed your options, changing the spark plug in a somewhat cold and dim-lit garage or changing a tire in the chill out in the dark. It was an easy choice.
So, for the next two hours, you replaced the spark plug. Huffing and out of breath, you started the engine, which purred to your satisfaction. Feeling accomplished, you went to the only open convenience store and stocked up on some groceries. Fiona, the cashier, was a middle-aged lady who didn't talk much, unlike the other folks in the town.
When you went to pay, you realized you had left your phone. You must have left it in the cabin when you went to search for the truck keys.
Ugh! Sometimes, you hated that you remembered directions. It made you less dependent on your phone. Luckily, you had your wallet on you.
After bidding bye to Fiona, you loaded the two brown bags into the truck. It was then you heard the yowling and the hisses. You saw the small white kitten by the lamppost in the parking. It looked like an Angora. She hurt her leg and was profusely bleeding. Your heart tugged painfully.
You unzipped your coat slightly and carefully lifted her up. She clutched at your shirt, meowing. You rushed to the convenience store inside, scaring sweet Fiona almost to death. You explained about the kitten, and she gave directions to the vet. She even called, telling them you would be coming with an injured cat.
So, you thanked her and decided to walk since it was not far, and the poor kitty seemed far too comfortable in your arms. As soon as you reached the corner house in the location, a young guy and a woman were waiting outside. The woman introduced herself as Darlene. She seemed nice and took the kitten gently from your hands. You waited for a bit while Darlene checked on the injuries.
However, the weirdly creepy receptionist, Mark, seemed to take too much interest in you, and he asked questions. A lot of questions. And he made you pretty uncomfortable. Luckily, Darlene walked out to tell you all was fine and that she would keep a watch on the kitten overnight. You were grateful that it wasn't anything serious. You promised to drop by tomorrow after she said it was okay for you to visit since it was a holiday.
Mark told you he'd walk you to the truck and wouldn't take no for an answer. By some miracle, Darlene understood and called him for something she needed. He begrudgingly got to work, giving you time to escape.
Yeah, it had been one crazy evening. Now that you think of it, the past month has been the same way.
****
In retrospect, it started with you getting buzzed after the Thanksgiving dinner at the compound. The seemingly innocent discussion with Vision about the white hole and string theory shifted to abstract physics. Then, it veered to your favorite multiverse causality, which brought to this discussion about your supersoldiers.
"You have such affection for them," Vision remarked.
"Of course I do," you replied breezily, sipping down the espresso martini. "They're my best friends." You grinned.
Vision tilted his head, studying you, dissecting your thoughts. "It is more than that," he said gently. "You love them. And it transcends friendship."
"What? No," you scoffed, a nervous laugh bubbling up. "That's... I mean, Vision, come on. It's not like that."
You defended, deterred, and denied. And you argued passionately with Vision that he was wrong and entirely out of his depth.
He gave you a smile. "One only argues this fervently when the truth threatens to unravel their carefully constructed narrative. No?"
And the point hit home like Thor's lightning.
Love? That wasn't love. That was friendship. Mutual respect. Admiration, loyalty, and the way they made you feel so cared for, and so so protective, it ought to be friendship! That's all it was. Wasn't it? Friends spend all day, every day together. Friends, just know what you need before you even say it... Friends do that. Totally!
You shook your head, muttering about Vision overanalyzing human emotions, and excused yourself to refill your drink. But his words trailed you, seeping in and breaking every carefully shackled, dreamy thought you occasionally had.
And your eyes landed on them. They were in the kitchen with Sam and Bruce. When your eyes met Steve's, he was already gazing at you. He wiggled your favorite ice cream in his hand, scooped it into a bowl, and winked at you. And Bucky's eyes softened when you met his gaze. He was in a mid-argument with Sam and casually leaned beside Steve, giving you a grin.
Your breath stilled. And something fucking snapped in place, and that realization disrupted everything.
Holy Shit!
Sitting on the nearby couch, you trembled as the flooding thoughts overtook your senses and limbs.
You've been inseparable for years now. You've known Steve even longer since he came out of the ice. Steve and you both were there to help Bucky through his healing. It had been a long journey through ups and downs, but you all were here with a somewhat stable life.
Now, there were times you felt extremely frustrated with the way they treated you, extremely protective and like you were delicate. They were there through your every whim and craziness; likewise, you were there for them. Though initially fostering a crush on both, becoming friends with them sidetracked your crush, or that was what you thought. Apparently not!
That rigid fact of love and its effects took hold of you, and you became even more aware of your predicament as time passed. Your thoughts buzzed as Steve casually sat beside you, eating ice cream while Bucky stole a few spoons from yours. The situation worsened when they fussed over your unusually quiet behavior, asking a hundred and some questions if something happened or if you were falling sick. You pulled yourself together and told them you were fine and downright rejected them staying over.
You woke up drenched that night, not from a nightmare; it was more of a wet dream starring two supersoldiers. What followed was you being hyper-focused on every little thing and how obsessively protective they were with you. And your heart was craving more, basking at their every little action.
It was bad.
And it got worse as the dreams continued and their worry for you catapulted, wondering what's going on with you.
Now, personal space was not a concept with both men. They were practically living two doors away in your apartment complex. And they were always around you.
You were starting to realize how fucked up the situation was. There was no way in the world this could work out. You loved them both. And you were acutely aware of their love for each other. How was this ever gonna work out?
Afraid of losing them, knowing you had no defenses against their piercing awareness of every flicker of your expression and every erratic heartbeat, you decided to take some time away. After all, distance helped you hate your family less. Out of sight, out of mind, right? You thought, why not try?
But it was not that easy to suddenly up and leave. Opportunity came in the form of a mission in Arizona. It was a level-2 mission, a low-level, routine assignment, far below the high-stakes operations you usually handled with the Avengers. Kert Harrison, the mission lead, seemed pleasantly surprised when you volunteered.
You let Steve and Bucky know only after you were strapped into the jet, delivering the news as casually as you could manage: the team needed a tech assistant, and you'd joined at the last minute.
Thus started the careful ghosting.
And the group chat exploded with messages. Bucky demanded the details, cursing up a storm, and you replied, 'Chill out, Sergeant, you know I can't communicate that stuff.'
You've ignored them after that. The mission was simple, walk-in-the-park simple, walk-in-the-house simple. Kept you occupied, though. But once the mission was done, the pit in your stomach grew, and the thought of seeing them terrified you.
"A little more time would help," you told yourself, "Just a little more time to breathe."
Knowing that Captain Softly Stern and Sergeant Toughly Tender would be your doom if you were anywhere close to them in this mindset, you ran for the hills. Quite literally.
Your aunt Ellen had a cabin in a small mountain town in NC. Conveniently, she was in Hawaii, leaving her cabin all alone. So, you decided it could use some company.
You then dropped a vague message telling them your aunt needed you, a family emergency, which was far from the truth.
And it sounded like the perfect Christmas. To be home alone.
But the problem was the cabin was not just lonely. It was alone lonely. The nearest town was 20 minutes away. Decked somewhere in the deep woods, a few other cabins surrounded near the lake. It suited Aunt Ellen, though. She occasionally came up to write or chill from the hustle and bustle of California.
And it didn't help that the whole setting felt like a Stephen King novel waiting to manifest. You couldn't help but internally whimper, but you sucked it up, pushing yourself to make it through.
You ignored the worried calls, always leaving them a text reply with a vaguely convincing excuse.
Guilt burgeoned your chest steadily for not spending Christmas with them. For the past few years, you three cozied up on the winter nights, cooking, baking, arguing, decorating, binge watching & cringe watching and the whole prospect had become a tradition.
Two days before Christmas, Steve had left a message asking if you could make it home. Home. He called it home, and your heart pained.
'Not likely, Steve.' You texted him.
'🥺🥹😭💔' he replied, making you almost break down and cry. He never sent any sort of emojis, and you always teased him about it. 'Emojis do the whole work and some, Steve.' You had told him a long, long while ago.
Steve might have thought this was the time to come after your heart with the series of emojis he sent. You had no guts to reply.
Bucky, however, seemed to stop buying your excuses after you ignored his calls. He stopped calling and texting altogether. It was typical Bucky. He got passively aggressive until you gave in. And you mustered a ton of courage to not just call or text.
Christmas morning, you woke up feeling like the Grinch. The memory of the worst Christmas when you were fourteen has been replaced by Christmas this year. This one felt far worse.
Steve left a voice message. "Merry Christmas, sweetheart. It's not the same without you." He sighed, voice soft and tattered. "We…miss you," his soft, broken voice shattered your heart even more.
Bucky, on the other hand, ignored you royally. But by the afternoon, he left a text with two words, 'Merry Christmas.' And your shattered heart further splintered.
This brilliant need-some-space vacation idea was supposed to be an escape, a way to clear your mind, to get over everything swirling inside. But it was only making things worse. It felt like you were meditating on them, and only them?
Ugh!
You mustered courage and called them that evening. Bucky picked up first, his voice gruff, replies short and clipped. "Fine. You doing good?" You hummed. "How's your aunt?" Steve piped in. They must've put you on speaker.
"She's ok," you said, and before they prodded, you asked them about their day. They mentioned getting your gifts, but other than that, they hadn't done much. The conversation felt hollow, and guilt weighed heavy on you. You felt like the worst person in the world.
Hurriedly, you said your goodbyes, fighting the tears that threatened to spill.
And then, you succumbed to the loneliness that clung to your heart and the messiness that tangled your thoughts. You spent six agonizing days in the cabin in the woods, fighting every instinct to run back to them.
That was a week ago. Seven horrible days ago. Today was New Year's Eve, and you thought you could use some sustenance, but it had already been one hell of a day.
~
Driving back to the cabin, you felt someone was watching you. You shook it off, chalking it up to the weird encounter with Mark. He'd set your nerves on edge, that's all. And at least the kitten was alright.
Pulling into the cabin's garage, you parked your car, not noticing the unfamiliar vehicle parked on the other side. You made your way to the other side to grab the grocery bags. The cold mountain air nipped at your skin.
The sound of boots against the gravel made you freeze. Your heart slammed into your ribs, and your pulse raced. There were a few other cabins nearby, but why would someone trespass, you wondered.
Was it Mark? Had he followed you? You grabbed the nearest thing within reach, a hammer, from the small wooden table.
The sound of heavy steps approached closer and closer, and you tightened your grip, preparing to swing. You almost threw the hammer, too, but realizing who stood there made you whimper in relief and dread.
"What the fuck? What are you two doing here?" you yelled, confused and rattled.
Steve briskly walked toward you, his expression concerned. "Is that blood?" he asked, his eyes narrowing as he tried to get a look at your neck and hands.
Oh? You glanced at yourself and then up at them.
"Are you hurt?" Steve repeated his question sternly, pulling down the zipper to your jacket, completely unbothered.
"HEY!" You shook your head, stepping away from his hold. At least you tried.
Before you could protest, Bucky came closer, his brow furrowed as he unzipped your jacket, swatting away your tiny hand. Both of them froze, staring at your shirt. You glanced down and groaned. You'd forgotten you were wearing a Captain America T-shirt now covered in blood.
Steve blinked, visibly surprised. They had no idea you owned any Captain America merchandise, let alone a few bobbleheads, one of a metal-armed man and another of the man himself holding his shield, both of which you'd secretly bought earlier this year.
Bucky turned you around, cold fingers holding your chin up, demanding if you were hurt. Your breath hitched, looking up at him. His stubble was slightly grown, and the stressed look on his face made you more worried. You glanced at Steve; he looked like he hadn't slept in days, and his knuckles looked marred like he had been going at the punching bags.
"I'm fine." You whispered, not meeting their gaze and staring at the soft blue undershirt covering Bucky's broad chest. Steve had taken the hammer you still held in your hands and carefully placed them on the table.
"Start talking before you give us a heart attack," he sternly demanded.
You rolled your eyes and cleared your hazy mind. You took a steadying breath before explaining to them that it wasn't your blood and what had actually happened with the kitten, omitting Mark of course. When you finished, you glanced up at them, who looked at you angrily.
Bucky sighed, and he took another deliberate step closer to you. "Family emergency, huh?" he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "Then why are you here playing house in the middle of nowhere while your aunt Ellen is in Hawaii?"
Your eyes widened, "How the hell…?" your question faltered on your lips as you caught the guilty look in Steve's eyes while Bucky shrugged smugly.
"Never mind. Don't answer that," you muttered, reminding yourself that you were talking to Captain America & the ex-Winter Soldier.
Steve zipped up your jacket when you shivered from the sudden gust of wind. "Let's go inside," he ordered. You nodded, reaching for the bags, but Bucky was already there, pushing you aside.
"Get your ass inside. I've got them," he grumbled, clearly angry at you for ghosting them.
You walked with Steve and Bucky beside you, fumbling for your keys, but Steve simply pushed the door open. "Don't bother," he mumbled.
"Unbelievable," you muttered. "You pried open the door?" you squeaked.
"Your phone was inside. Your car was outside. No sign of you," Bucky said defensively. "What the fuck did you expect us to do?"
When you glanced at Steve, who tended to be less of a rule-breaking hazard than Bucky, he shrugged, "Oh, I was this close to breaking it down. Thanks to Bucky, we managed to keep it intact." Steve chuckled, holding the door open for you and Bucky to enter.
"Ugh," you groaned, storming into the cabin with them trailing behind.
"Nice shirt, by the way," Steve commented as you walked in, "Didn't know you were a fan."
"Of course you like it," Bucky chuckled, glancing at Steve with that grin you were all too familiar with. Steve straightened up proudly.
"Do you also have a Winter Soldier plushie hiding somewhere? No judgment if you do." Bucky snickered, reaching you, dropping the bags on the counter, and effectively cornering you in the small kitchen.
Your face burned. "It's my aunt's. She's a fan. I found it lying around," you lied poorly.
"Uh-huh," Bucky smirked, and Steve grinned, knowing all the signs fully well.
You cleaned up your hands, washing out the traces of blood here and there. You felt agitated. They were here, the stupidly gorgeous men. Your friends. Your everything. They couldn't possibly understand the volcanic arc stretching your mind right now.
You grabbed a bottle from the neatly stacked row in the cabinet, placed it on the counter, and unscrewed the cap. Sidestepping Bucky, you quickly made your way to the living room. As soon as you sat down, you chugged half the bottle, feeling the cool liquid help clear some of the tension that had been building in your chest.
"What the hell are you two doing here?" you asked, feeling utterly exhausted and emotionally drained.
You heard them approach you as Steve settled beside you and Bucky sat on the wooden coffee table before you. For a split second, you thought it would give away, but the table looked sturdy.
You sighed and refocused on getting your brain to work, but it felt impossible with them so close.
Steve took your left hand into his large, firm grip. He traced his thumb along your wrist, his touch sending waves of warmth flooding through you, and for a moment, your heartbeat stuttered, racing beneath his fingertips. You tried to steady your breath, but it only intensified the sensation.
"What are you doing here, doll?" Bucky asked seriously, and you averted your gaze, trying to pull away your hand from Steve's, but he wouldn't let go.
"Steve," you muttered softly, helplessly, and he reluctantly let go.
"Uh…I…" you started, heart thundering. This was supposed to be your solace, your way out of the whole thing, and here you were being asked to confront. You hated it.
Your head started pounding. You rubbed your fingers to your head.
Bucky stood abruptly. "Alright, sit tight. I'll make you some tea. It'll ease your headache."
"No!" you snapped, your voice rising. "Stop that. Do not make tea."
Bucky froze mid-step, genuinely baffled by your sudden outburst. "Okayyy. No tea," he said slowly, folding his arms. "But I'm not giving you coffee. You'll end up awake all night, and it gives you a stomachache," Bucky argued.
You buried your head in your hands, feeling overwhelmed and helpless. How do you not become hyper-aware of all these little things? How? They never would get it.
Steve leaned closer, still maintaining distance, but his hand caressed your hair, comforting and enraging your senses, "Hey, did you eat anything besides cereal?" he asked, and you looked at him confused.
You couldn't help but scoff internally. How the hell would you know that, Rogers? But you didn't voice your thoughts aloud. Knowing he knew you better.
"Okay, we are not talking until you eat something. Go change, wash up. I'll make you something," he ordered.
With a dejected sigh, you dragged yourself up and headed for the shower.
The shower helped, mostly. It washed away the blood and tiredness, surely, but also washed some of your inhibitions away.
You headed back to the kitchen, where you heard them.
"Slice it, Buck, not Julienne."
"It tastes the same. How does it matter?" Bucky argued.
You couldn't help but chuckle. This was familiar. This felt like home. They were home. And there they were, making sandwiches and looking utterly comfortable, their shoes and jackets discarded. They also looked sinfully hot, those tight undershirts clinging to their muscles, and the agonizing thoughts returned.
"I miss your t-shirt," Steve quipped with a grin, eyeing your plain red t-shirt and leggings as you walked closer. "Again, that's my aunt's. Get over it, Steven." You muttered.
Bucky leaned against the countertop, his intense gaze fixed on yours. You walked up to him slowly.
"Sorry for yelling at you," you told him sincerely. His gaze searched yours, and his insanely pink lips curled into a small smile.
"C'mere," he said, his voice low and warm, pulling you into a hug before you could respond.
You melted into him immediately, feeling the heat of his body against yours, the familiar comfort of his embrace washing over you. That perfect mix of musk and something undeniably Bucky wafted over your senses and calmed the chaos inside your head. You tightened your arms around him, the ache of missing him--of missing them--filling your chest.
You could feel the deep rumble of his chest against your cheek, the sound vibrating through you, sending a warmth that felt grounding and exhilarating. And when he tightened his hold around you, pulling you just a little closer, your breath hitched. You flushed, overwhelmed by the intensity of it.
"'S all good, ok?" he murmured softly, his voice so reassuring it made your heart ache. "Let's eat."
Reluctantly, you pulled away, blinking as you tried to steady yourself, the flood of emotions threatening to spill over.
When you walked towards Steve, he grinned at you, and you leaned your forehead against his large bicep, feeling it flex as he worked. His familiar warmth settled around you.
"I hate it when you don't take care of yourself," Steve said. You stepped away before Steve decided to lecture you more.
You grabbed the plates and started setting them aside, wanting to keep busy to avoid the tension in the room. Your furtive glances toward them didn't go unnoticed. Both Steve and Bucky were quiet as you ate in silence. You hated yourself for not suggesting that you play something on the TV to distract from the discomfiting silence. But you were paralyzed emotionally.
When you tried to clear the plates, Steve gently stopped you. You reluctantly handed him the plates, feeling small in the space between you.
Bucky seemed to notice your unease. "Want to have that tea now?" he asked quietly, his eyes never leaving you. You averted your eyes; instead, you leaned against the wall for support. You nodded in response, trying to pull yourself together but not quite succeeding.
Bucky moved to prepare the tea, and you let yourself stay quiet, not looking at him--at either of them--afraid that if you did, you'd spill everything you'd been trying to hold back.
You felt so pathetic and helpless. Wanting to seek their comfort but feeling that would be unjust.
And you watched Steve walk to you, wiping his hands on the towel before walking closer.
He reached for your hand, his grip warm, and it felt perfectly assuring. You could feel the tension in his fingers, the way he held you as if he already knew the answer to the question he was about to ask.
"Let me ask you something. Did something happen that you're hiding?"
You swallowed hard, the lump in your throat making it difficult to answer.
The intensity of his look only seemed to make it harder. You shook your head slightly, your voice barely audible as you mumbled, "No."
"Did Buck or I hurt you?"
"No!" you said, loudly and firmly.
"Then why?" His voice softened even further.
You stared at him, feeling the truth stuck in your throat, tangled in a way that made speaking impossible. Your eyes drifted, landing on Bucky, who stood just a few feet away, his posture tense, his eyes flickering between you and Steve.
You couldn't bring yourself to do it. You couldn't say it. You'd spent years building something so beautiful with them, something so right. And if you let it out, if you gave voice to the fear and guilt swirling inside you, everything could come crashing down. What if you lost them? Everything between you, the connection, the love, the trust. What if it all fell apart because you were too weak to keep it together?
That thought should have stopped you, should have held you back.
But the tears welled in your eyes despite your best efforts to hide them. You pressed your palms against your temples, trying to stave off the pressure building inside you. Still, the overwhelming rush of emotion was too much.
"Hey, hey…" Steve's voice was soft, and suddenly, his hands were on you, gently pulling your hands away from your face, coaxing your gaze back to him. His eyes, filled with nothing but tenderness, locked onto yours. "It's okay. Whatever it is, you can tell us. We're not going anywhere. You're not going to lose us."
You couldn't stop the tears from falling now.
You had no idea what to say or what to do next. All you knew was that you had avoided them to overcome the feelings, but here you were, confronting them head-on.
"You've been my home, both of you," you whispered, voice trembling as you looked at Steve and then Bucky. They were both silent and looked almost terrified.
"I was scared when I realized that... that..." You couldn't finish the thought. Steve and Bucky's eyes locked on yours, looking like they were waiting for something.
"I'm scared, selfish, messy, and all complicated," you continued, your voice breaking with every syllable. "I'm not strong enough to lose you both…" You sucked in a shaky breath, fighting to keep your composure. "I'm selfish. To want something I don't deserve. And you might just hate me after I tell you."
You sounded so pathetic to your ears. You couldn't look at them anymore. You couldn't face them. Without thinking, you walked away, stumbling to the drawing room, where you collapsed onto the couch, curling in on yourself. You clutched your t-shirt tightly by the sides and let the tears flow freely, everything from guilt to pain to fear pouring out.
You felt Steve and Bucky both hurry towards you. Steve knelt before you, large palms rubbing your thighs to calm you.
"Look at me," Steve said, voice barely above a whisper. "Say it," his commanding tone was merely begging, pleading.
And you obeyed.
"I can't keep this in anymore, Steve. It's suffocating me. I love you both, and I'm so scared."
You said it, sealed your fate.
For a moment, there was nothing. Complete silence.
You could feel Steve's grip on your legs loosen, his hands falling away slowly as if the weight of your confession had stunned him. Then, Bucky's breath hitched from behind you. His presence shifted, the weight beside you on the couch telling you he sat beside you.
You shut your eyes, silently crying.
You did it. You messed up. Didn't you? You felt ashamed. This was the moment you feared the most. They'd never look at you the same way. You'd ruined everything.
"Do you think I'd let just anyone touch my hair?" Bucky asked, his voice low and trembling. You looked up, confused. What did that have to do with what you said?
"What?" You managed hoarsely.
"You," he said, his deep blue eyes locking onto yours. "I let you cut my hair. I hate when anyone touches it but with you... it's different. It's always been different."
"Bucky..." you whispered, but he didn't let you interrupt.
"I loved you the moment you held me close after that nightmare in Wakanda. Do you remember that? I was a mess, and you just… didn't let go. Not until I could breathe again. I broke your finger by mistake at how tight I held you." His voice broke, and he swallowed hard.
"I love Steve. I've always loved him. And then... I loved you, too. It scared the shit out of me, but it's the truth." Bucky sniffled, and continued, "Ever since Thanksgiving, you've been distant, and I was terrified, thinking I'd done something terrible and lost you forever. And it fucking hurts, sweetheart."
Your breath caught in your throat. You stood up, stumbling ungracefully as you stepped away, needing to breathe. Bucky moved behind you, his hands on your arms, steadying you. You let him hold you. He tugged you closer, your back against his strong chest, his arms winding on your stomach, letting you put all your weight onto him, effectively calming you.
Steve stepped forward, holding something small in his hand. Your eyes widened as he held up a familiar notebook.
"Do you remember this?" he asked softly.
You nodded, stunned. That's the tiny notebook you gave to him. Years ago, right after he came out of the ice.
Steve opened the notebook and flicked through the pages. Your breath hitched as you saw it filled with sketches of you, Bucky, and moments you'd shared.
"You told me to fill it with things I wanted to remember," Steve said, his voice warm and full of emotion. "But all I could think about was you. I was so scared to feel love again. I loved Bucky for so long, and then you came into my life, and I... I didn't know how to go about it."
Steve exchanged a brief, meaningful glance with Bucky. His eyes softened as he continued, "But then Bucky returned, and I realized he felt the same. I've never been very religious, doll, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't pray for this every darn day."
Bucky chuckled softly, the sound deep and reassuring. "Believe me, we'd be a mess without you," he said, gently kissing your hair. "I love you," he murmured.
"I love you," Steve echoed, gently kissing your cheek.
You blinked rapidly and your mind was reeling. The world seemed to stop around you. Your heart raced, and your breath caught in your throat as you processed their words. But then, confusion took over.
"I... I don't understand. I can't choose," you stammered, your heart torn between the joy and the overwhelming fear of what this meant.
"You don't have to," Bucky said firmly, lips touching your right ear sensually, sending shivers down your spine. "Steve and I are a package deal. You get him, you get me, and vice versa. Take it or leave it. Actually, scratch that. Just take it."
Your lips parted in disbelief, and looked at Steve. He nodded, looking at you hopefully. You let out a nervous chuckle.
"What did you put in that sandwich? I think I'm high," you mumbled, laughing softly.
Steve smirked, his eyes twinkling joyfully. "Apart from Bucky's horribly chopped tomatoes, nothing you don't like," he teased. He crouched slightly to kiss you softly. Just a barely present touch, but it lit a fire so quickly that you trembled. He tasted perfect, just like him, soft and manly.
Bucky followed suit, twirling you in his arms, lifting you to his level, his kiss more fervent, grounding you. He tasted musky and familiar, spicy and so so him.
You pulled back, wide-eyed, your heart racing.
"Oh, boy," you whispered, a dazed smile across your face.
The distant sound of fireworks startled you, and the three of you turned toward the window. Faint remnants of flickering lights lit up the sky. The neighbors must have set the fireworks on the lake.
"Happy New Year," Steve said softly, his hand finding yours and Bucky's.
"Happy New Year," Bucky echoed, his metal arm wrapping around your waist.
Happy New Year, indeed!
And tomorrow, you'd text your aunt out of courtesy, letting her know you have visitors over, while keeping all the lewd details to yourself. Then, you'd go to the vet to check on the kitten, which the three of you decide to adopt and name her Alpine. A purrfect New Year, indeed!
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Having a super hard time right now so could you do a single dad kirishma or bakugo or shinsou and they’re struggling trying to juggle parenthood and being a pro then they meet y/n she’s new to their agency and she just so happens to catch their eye, just a simple receptionist but she has so many ideas. They’re so busy that they don’t even get the chance to actually meet her until one day she comes up to their office with an idea for a daycare in the agency since she’s getting so many call outs about people who don’t have child care. She offers to run/teach the daycare as well since she was a teacher back in the states before she moved and it turns out this is the key to their own problems and they slowly fall in love with her.
author's note: Hey, I just wanted to clarify something. I’ve noticed that “comfort fics” sometimes get published quickly after being requested, which might give the impression that I prioritize them. However, that’s not the case—every fic is written and published in the order it was requested.
If you requested this piece, you might have noticed that I didn’t publish it immediately after seeing it. Please know that I don’t rush requests out of order. The only time I made an exception was for an emergency request, but I now realize that was a mistake, as some people overlooked my author’s note explaining it was a one-time thing. I’m sorry for any confusion, and I appreciate your patience!
Safe in Your Hands
The constant buzzing of his phone was a persistent, grating reminder that life didn’t slow down for anyone. Not even for Katsuki Bakugo.
“Goddamnit,” he muttered under his breath, rubbing his temples as he read yet another text from the daycare. His son, Ryo, had caught a cold and needed to be picked up early—again. He wasn’t mad at the kid, never at him, but the frustration of trying to juggle being a top pro hero and a single father was wearing him thin.
His office was a mess of paperwork, mission reports, and unfinished emails. He was barely keeping his head above water, and his agency, while thriving, was in dire need of some structure. Or a miracle.
That’s when a soft knock at his door pulled him out of his thoughts.
“Come in,” he grumbled, expecting another stack of files or another meeting he didn’t have time for.
Instead, you stepped in.
“Good afternoon, Dynamight-san.”
He barely looked up at first, recognizing you as the new receptionist. You’d been here a couple of months, always polite, always handling things smoothly. He’d noticed, even if he never had the time to actually speak to you. You were a quiet force in the chaos, managing things from behind the front desk with a calm confidence.
“I, uh, hope I’m not interrupting,” you said, shifting slightly but holding your ground. “I have an idea I wanted to run by you.”
His gaze flickered up then, curiosity outweighing his exhaustion. “What kinda idea?”
You stepped forward, placing a neatly written proposal on his desk. “I’ve been getting a lot of call-outs from employees who are struggling with childcare. And I’ve noticed you’ve had to step out unexpectedly for similar reasons. I was a teacher back in the States before moving here, and I was thinking… what if we had an in-agency daycare?”
He blinked, stunned into silence for the first time in what felt like months.
“I’d be willing to help set it up, even run it,” you continued, your voice steady. “It’d give the staff some peace of mind, knowing their kids are safe while they work. And it might make things easier for you, too.”
He stared at you for a long moment, your words sinking in. No one had ever suggested something like this before. No one had ever looked at the chaos of his life and offered a solution so simple yet perfect.
“Tch,” he finally scoffed, leaning back in his chair. “You’re serious about this?”
You nodded. “Completely.”
And just like that, something in his chest loosened.
Maybe—just maybe—he wasn’t doing this alone anymore.
The next few weeks passed in a blur. Once Bakugo approved the daycare idea, you got straight to work. There were meetings to hold, rooms to convert, supplies to order, and staff to hire. Despite the long hours, you found yourself energized by the project. The employees were thrilled with the idea, and as word spread through the agency, more and more heroes began stopping by to offer assistance.
Bakugo was still a little wary, though. He wasn’t the type to trust easily, but he couldn’t deny that things were starting to feel a little less overwhelming.
One evening, as you were reviewing the final details before the daycare’s official opening, Bakugo showed up at the converted space. You looked up from your clipboard, surprised to see him standing in the doorway with Ryo in his arms. The little boy, looking sleepy and snuggled into his father’s shoulder, blinked at you drowsily.
“Figured we should do a test run,” Bakugo muttered, stepping inside. “See how the brat likes it.”
You smiled warmly. “Of course. Come on in.”
Setting Ryo down gently, Bakugo watched as the toddler hesitantly explored the room. His tiny hands ran over the soft mats, and he eyed the shelves of toys with curiosity. Slowly, he toddled toward a plush All Might figure, giving it an experimental squeeze.
You crouched down next to him. “You like that one, Ryo?”
The boy looked up at you, then at his father, before nodding shyly.
Bakugo exhaled, running a hand through his hair. “Looks like it’s a hit.”
You grinned. “I think so.”
For the first time since you’d met him, you saw the tension in Bakugo’s shoulders ease slightly. Maybe this really was the answer to the problem he hadn’t been able to solve alone.
As the weeks went by, the daycare became an integral part of the agency. Parents were relieved, the kids were happy, and Bakugo—though he’d never say it outright—was grateful beyond words.
You and Bakugo started seeing more of each other, too. At first, it was just in passing—quick meetings to discuss logistics, brief encounters when he dropped Ryo off. But then, it turned into coffee breaks, conversations that stretched a little longer each day, small moments of laughter that neither of you had expected.
One evening, after a particularly long shift, Bakugo stopped by your office. You looked up, surprised to see him lingering in the doorway.
“Hey,” he said gruffly.
“Hey,” you replied, setting your pen down. “Everything okay?”
He hesitated, then sighed. “Yeah. Just… wanted to say thanks. For everything.”
A warm feeling spread through your chest. “You don’t have to thank me, Bakugo. I’m happy to help.”
His gaze softened, just a little. “Still. You’ve made shit easier for me. And for Ryo.”
You smiled. “Well, I’m glad. He’s a great kid.”
A rare smirk tugged at his lips. “Yeah, he is.”
Silence settled between you, comfortable and warm. And in that moment, you both knew—this was just the beginning.
As months passed, your presence in Bakugo’s life became more than just professional. He found himself looking forward to seeing you every day, whether it was during a hectic morning drop-off or a quiet evening chat after work. Ryo adored you, always running to you with excitement when he saw you at the daycare.
One night, after a late shift, you were locking up when Bakugo showed up with Ryo asleep in his arms. He was exhausted, but there was something softer in his expression than usual.
“Wanna grab a late dinner?” he asked, almost shyly.
You blinked in surprise before smiling. “I’d love to.”
And just like that, everything changed. The weight on Bakugo’s shoulders didn’t feel so heavy anymore. Because for the first time in years, he wasn’t carrying it alone.
#bakugou katsuki x reader#katsuki bakugou x reader#katsuki x reader#bakugou x y/n#bakugou x you#bakugou x reader#bnha x reader#mha x reader#x reader#bakugo x reader#bakugo x you#bakugo x y/n#bnha#mha#mha fanfiction#my hero academia#boku no hero academia
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Let Me Be of Service
Pairing: Husband!Bucky x Pregnant!Wife!reader
Summary: With your growing belly, it gets a lot harder to take care of yourself. Luckily, your husband is always willing to lend a helping hand
Warnings: Fluff, a little smut, reader is heavily preggo, established relationship, Bucky is down bad, Bucky shaves his girl’s cooch and boot, crack fic, embarrassing stories about each other, implied smut at the end, banter, Bucky calls reader Petal and she calls him Duckie
Word Count: 2.7k
A/N: A little something something to hold you guys over while I’m working on part 2 of Change My Ways For You. Thank you to @buckys-wintersoldier for beta reading; however, any and all mistakes are mine and mine alone.
You hear the clashing of pans in the kitchen followed by your husband’s curse. It brings a smile to your lips, knowing that he is trying to make you breakfast in bed, even though he is probably the worst cook you have ever met. When you first started dating, he made the joke that he was the only person that could start a fire with water.
You didn’t believe him until he actually did start a fire while boiling water at his first and only attempt to make pasta for the two of you to eat. You still have no idea how he managed to do that, but ever since then it’s either you cook, he ‘helps’ you in the kitchen, which is you giving him the easiest thing to do and hope that he doesn’t blow you up, or you order out.
But ever since you got pregnant, doing everyday tasks has gotten harder. You get out of breath from just standing up. Don’t even start with trying to pick something up off the floor. If it hits the ground, it’s going to stay there until Bucky picks it up if you can’t grip it with your toes. Cooking has become a near impossible task for you. Who knew that carrying a super soldier baby would be so hard?
Your belly was larger than the average woman’s stomach for how far along you are. It wasn’t just that your belly was big though. It caused so much back pain that it was easier to just lay on your side all day, and your feet ached and pulsed from the shortest walk.
You felt like a bad wife, not able to help take care of the house, or yourself for that matter. But Bucky was a saint, he doted on you every second of the day. He took his leave of absence as soon as you started grunting while moving around. Bucky loved every minute of it though, albeit he hated seeing you in pain, but every change to your body was incredible to him. He was obsessed with how round you were, how full your breasts are, and the cute little pout that is always on your lips.
So you appreciated Bucky for trying to make you something to eat; although you knew it was going to be disgusting, possibly inedible, you would take it with a smile on your face because he tried and that was something you were grateful for.
You decided to get out of bed, not to take over making breakfast in the fear of burning down your house, of course not, but to watch your man in action. When you shifted, however, it became painfully obvious that you were overdue for a shave. The prickly hairs on your pussy were uncomfortable, making putting your legs together almost painful.
You have no idea when the last time you shaved was. All you knew was that it was when you could still see your feet, and that was a loooonnng time ago. Bucky didn’t seem to mind your body hair. He would still eat you out until you had to roll over from the weight of your belly making it hard to breathe. He never once complained about your public hair and you honestly forgot that you hadn’t shaved in so long, until this moment.
Throwing on Bucky’s henley, grateful that he was so fucking beefy so you could still fit into his shirt, although tight around the belly, and wobbled out to the kitchen. Bucky heard you, your feet heavy on the wood floors. “Petal, you’re going to love this! I made you grilled cheese and guess what?” He spins around, bright smile on his face, a grilled cheese plated in his hands.
“I have officially made something edible without us having to evacuate the house, AND it’s only slightly burnt.” The early morning sun casts a soft glow on his naked chest. He looked like a Greek god, corded muscles topped with a bit of softness, the result of your cooking and less time with the Avengers.
“Good job, Duckie. Good thing too because I’m starving. Bug isn’t going to stop kicking my bladder until she gets something to eat.” Crow’s feet bloom around Bucky’s eyes. He falls in love with you harder every day, seeing you carry his baby into the world, keeping her safe in your belly.
Bucky sets the singular grilled cheese at your spot on the table, pulling out the chair for you to sit, strong hands grabbing your waist, making sure you don’t strain yourself too hard. He spins around and gets you a cup of your favorite morning drink and places it in front of you, quickly sitting down opposite you, eagerly waiting for you to take a bite.
“Duckie, aren’t you going to have one, too?” His sweet Petal was too good to him.
“Well, Petal, only one turned out.” He gives you a sheepish smile and you can only giggle at him.
“Do you want half of mine then? I don’t mind sharing.” You were starving your ass off, but you wanted to reward Bucky with something for being so good to you.
He vehemently shakes his head. “Uh, uh, Petal, you and Bug need to eat. I can find something else. Now hurry up and tell me if I meet up to your standards.”
Before you take a bite you reach over the table to grab his right hand, running your fingers over the wedding band there. He couldn’t wear it on his left hand, but you wanted everyone to know that he was yours. “You always exceed my standards, Duck.”
Bucky blushes and gestures for you to have a taste. Your eyes widen as the cheesy snack hits your tongue. “Oh my god, this is actually good!” Bucky leans back in his chair and does a small victory dance, proud of himself for feeding his wife.
His celebration is cut short when he sees you shift in your seat, clearly uncomfortable. “Petal, what’s wrong? Is Bug kicking?” Bucky is by your side in seconds cupping your belly, only to find that Bug isn’t causing a raucous.
“It’s kind of embarrassing.” You look down, away from his prying eyes.
“We have been together for 8 years, Petal. I stood watch while you took a shit on the side of the highway, it can’t be that bad.”
You whip your head around. “Duckie! We don’t talk about that. I told you not to bring that up again. It was one time!” Bucky only laughs and turns his head away.
��Petal, we both know that it was twice and we had to stop by Mcdonalds so you could wash yourself after you wiped with poison ivy.” Bucky was barely containing his laughter, while you were dying of embarrassment. “You know, that was the moment I knew I was going to marry you?”
You scoffed. “When we were stuck on the highway while I popped a squat? That cannot be when you knew you were going to marry me. That is not what you said at the wedding.”
“Didn’t think that you would appreciate that story being told to all of our friends and family. But your secret is safe with me.”
“Since we are bringing up the past, remember the time you were training with Sam and he hit you in the balls and you pissed yourself. You called me to bring you a new pair of underwear and I made sure no one knew.” You turned your chin up.
“C’mon, Petal, it wasn’t even that much. It was just a dot. And it wasn’t my fault I had a full bladder. Don’t make me bring what happened the other week when you-”
You slapped your hand over his mouth, grabbing him by the back of his head and pulling him close to you. “Don’t. You. Dare. We never mention that again, we forget it ever happened, yeah?”
Bucky moans at your dominance, it never failed to get his cock hard. “Okay, okay, I’ll stop, but you have to tell me what’s got you wobbling in your seat. And I know it’s not because my cooking turned you on.”
You took a deep breath before looking into his eyes. “Promise you won’t laugh?”
“I can’t promise that, Petal, but I won’t judge you.” Of course, Bucky and you always laughed at each other. Never when it was something serious. But you were able to joke around when the other did something embarrassing, but he would never joke about it if you were uncomfortable.
“My pussy hurts.” You squint your eyes, the grumpiest look on your face, and cross your arms.
“Petal, that’s all you had to say. I’m an expert on taking care of my sweet girl. If I lick her bud would that make it better?” You feel your cunt pulse at his words, but the scratching is too annoying to let you get turned on.
“No, Duckie! I mean my fucking hair is too long and it’s poking me and it fucking hurts and I can’t reach to shave because of this huge belly, and it makes me feel like a sasquatch and I just want to feel pretty.” You almost burst into tears, not knowing that you had so many emotions bubbling under the surface, but then again you were pregnant and couldn’t control them.
“Oh, Petal, you are the most gorgeous woman on this planet, shaven or not. And you don’t need to worry about doing anything for yourself, you hear me? If you wanted me to, I would wipe your ass for you.” You sucked your teeth and slapped his chest.
“I’m being serious!”
“And so am I.”
Without another word, Bucky picks you up like you weigh nothing and heads to your bedroom and sets you down on the soft covers. “Duckie, what are you doing?” He still doesn’t say anything as he walks into the bathroom to get a towel and your conditioner and sets them on the bed. He leaves the room only to come back a minute later with a bowl of water and his razor. “You cannot be serious right now.”
“Oh, Petal, deathly.” He flicks the towel out and lays it on the edge of the bed and sets you there, your feet planted on either side of you and you’re forced to lay back with your belly.
You don’t see what he is up to, but you feel his hot breath fan across your folds and he groans. “Petal, is this making you wet? Your husband between your legs about to service you?” He chuckles as the twitch of your clit. “Fuck, prettiest pussy I’ve ever seen. Makes my cock so fucking hard, could cum in my pants just from eating her.”
“Duckie, don’t lie. I know it doesn’t look pretty. Probably could fucking braid it.” You fight the urge to close your legs. You haven’t had sex in almost three weeks, mainly because your body is so exhausted all the time and you know you wouldn’t be able to enjoy it.
“Petal, when have I ever lied to you? You think I would lie straight to my pretty girl’s face? How could I lie right in front of Heaven?” He leans in closer and you hear the deep inhale he takes. “And about that braid comment, I learned how to braid hair in Wakanda so that isn’t a problem for me.”
He gets a giggle out of you. “I can’t fucking believe you. You’re such a dork.” Rather than hear his chuckle, you feel it, his mouth pressed against your cunt, lapping your juices. “Fuck, oh shit, don’t stop.”
“Mmh, so fucking good. Don’t even need to eat breakfast when I have this meal on a fucking platter.” He dives back in, arms wrapped around your thighs, keeping you in place. With his hands occupied with your thighs, you were able to grind against his mouth, urging him to focus on your clit. Bucky was in his own world, the hairs pressing against his face not deterring him in the slightest.
His groan is deep and sends shockwaves up your spine, unable to stop the jerk of your hips. All at once, Bucky lets go of your thighs and turns away to sneeze. With great difficulty, you sit up and stare at him, perplexed. “Duckie, you better not fucking tell me that my pubes make you sneeze or so help me.”
Bucky falls onto his back, clutching his stomach as his laughter rings out in the room. The obvious tent is his pants still there. “I’m sorry, Petal, just tickled my nose is all.” His entire face is red, each word coming out in a wheeze.
“Duckie, it’s not funny.” Even at your protests, you feel yourself unable to control your laughter.
“If it’s not funny, then why are you laughing, Petal?” Bucky is finally able to control himself enough to sit up and rest his head on your thigh.
“Because you were laughing. Don’t you dare try and eat me out right now.” You push his forehead away, much to his dismay. “Are you going to shave me or not?” Your pout has him pressing his lips together to stop the giggle from leaving his lips.
“Of course, my hedge.”
“DUCKIE!”
“I’m only joking.”
You lay back and prop your feet up again, jolting slightly as Bucky runs his hands, dipped in water, over your folds and mound. While slightly more prepared for the conditioner, it still feels foreign to have his hands touching you like this.
“Fuck, Petal, just one more taste.”
“Duckie.”
“Fine.”
He starts with your lips, using one hand to hold them tight, taking extra care not to knick your sensitive skin. “Hey, Duckie?” The only view you have is of the ceiling so you don’t see the absolute concentration on Bucky’s face, tongue poking out, and eyebrows furrowed.
“Yeah, Petal?”
“Do you think it’s normal that I’m getting turned on by this?” Bucky loved that you were comfortable enough in your relationship to casually talk about random things, knowing that he wouldn’t judge you for them, most of the time he was on the same page as you anyway.
“Probably not, but if it makes you feel any better, I’m solid as a rock right now.” You giggle at his casual tone, almost as if he was asking you how your day was. “Don’t move, I’m performing a delicate operation here.” It only makes you giggle more and Bucky has to pull away, leaning over to the side so you could see his face.
“Okay, I guess I’ll just lay here then.” It was Bucky’s turn to suck his teeth in but doesn’t say anything else.
“Hey, Duckie?” Bucky sighs and begrudgingly answers. “Is that my slick running down my ass or water? I need to know how embarrassed I should be.”
“I could give it a taste and answer you.”
“Ew, no. I probably have little bits of hair everywhere.”
With each stroke of the razor you feel yourself relax more and more. The constant presence of his hands soothing you. Bucky taps your leg to signal that you’re done and picks you up, bending you over the bed. “Duckie, we are not having sex right now.”
“Petal, you know that I am very thorough in everything that I do, and I still have your perfect ass to shave” You groan and bury your face into the covers.
“C’mon, Duck, this is worse than before. I feel so exposed.” Bucky rubs his hand down your spine, his other hand reaching under you to support your belly.
“Nothing I haven’t seen before, and I’m going to make my girl feel pretty.” He lands a light slap to your right asscheek and grinds his hips against your cunt once before pulling away.
He works just the same, using one hand to spread you open while carefully removing all your hair. When he’s done he pulls back, one hand cupping each cheek. You huff when he jiggles your ass to his heart’s content, letting him have his reward for taking care of you.
“Duckie! Did you just bite my fucking ass?”
“Couldn’t help it, Petal, so fucking sexy.”
You contemplate if you should kick him or kiss him. Your decision is cut short when he rolls you over again, now looking at your face. “Petal, we still have two legs to do and they both lead to my favorite petals.”
Fuck, you were in for it.
#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x you#bucky x reader#bucky x female reader#bucky x y/n#bucky barnes smut#bucky x you#bucky imagine#bucky smut#sebastian stan x reader#husband!bucky
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hi Mae I have a lil fic request if u like the idea! I would love to see something with reader and Remus where may be she is James neighbor and friendly with James and she sees Remus all the time coming and going and she finally works up the courage to ask James and be like what's ur friend's name? And he's like who? And she's all blushing like ya know the super pretty one that's really tall and last week he was reading x book! I actually love that book! And James realizes she's into him and plays wingman
Thank you for your request lovely!
cw: kind of shy!reader coded
Remus Lupin x fem!reader ♡ 809 words
You answer the door, and it’s the boy from next door.
Well, not the boy from next door. There are a few always passing in and out, and only one that you know of who actually lives there. But this is James’ friend, the one with the scars and the soft eyes. The one with the name from a fairy tale.
“Hi,” he says, “I’m Remus.”
“Hi.” You’re spellbound for a moment before you remember to tell him your name in turn, but he doesn’t appear to notice. “What can I do for you?”
“My friend, he lives next door…”
“James?”
His lips tilt. “That’s the one. He’s sent me to see if you have an egg we could borrow. Or, erm, take. I’m sure James will give you an egg in exchange once he gets some more, though.”
Laughter bubbles easily to the surface, your stomach fizzy with nerves. This is surely a scheme. James could have come and collected his egg himself, but instead he’s sent the friend you asked him about only two days prior. You aren’t sure whether to be grateful or angry with him; it may depend on how this goes.
“That’s okay, I can stand to give up an egg.” You go into your kitchen to fetch it. Remus follows partway, stopping at your bar counter. “Do you need something to keep it in?”
“No, that’s alright. Have you read this?”
You turn to find him looking at a worn out paperback, fingers skimming gently over the fold of pages. You blink. You hadn’t left that there.
“Yeah,” you say. “It’s one of my favorites.”
Remus looks up with interest. “Is it really? I’ve just finished it.”
You clamp your lips together so I know can’t escape. You’d seen Remus carrying the book into James’ place when you’d been getting your mail. You’d gotten your mail twice that day just to have an excuse to talk to James about him.
In fact, when James had come over last night—oddly, to borrow an egg then, too—you could have sworn the book was on your coffee table. And now it’s relocated to the kitchen counter.
Maybe James Potter is more conniving than you’ve given him credit for.
You pass Remus the egg. “What did you think of it?”
Remus’ eyes flit up to yours, and it’s a concentrated effort to keep your knees solid underneath you. He cradles the egg carefully in his hand. “I thought it was really good,” he says. “I liked how each subplot was given its due importance.”
“I really love that about it, too.”
“Do you have a favorite part?”
You duck your head, face warming. “It’s embarrassing.”
“Oh, come on.” You can hear the smile in Remus’ voice. “We read the same book. How embarrassing can it be?”
“I’m a romantic.” You shrug. “I liked the kiss scene best.”
When you peek up, Remus is indeed smiling, brown eyes warm. “That’s not embarrassing,” he says. “That’s sweet. It was a good scene.”
His gaze moves between you and the book, and you see a thoughtfulness come over his expression. Remus doesn’t strike you as the oblivious sort. He’s likely pieced together why exactly his friend sent him over here.
But he doesn’t look upset. No, whatever’s going on with his face is a lot more pinkish and complicated.
“Well,” he says after a moment, “thank you for the egg.” He offers you a small smile, moving towards the door. “I’m sure we’ll be seeing more of each other. James’ kitchen is never adequately stocked.”
You grin. “I’ve gathered that.”
Remus’ smile widens slightly, and then he’s slipping out your door, starting back for James’ place. You very carefully do not look out the window to watch him, but unfortunately (or fortunately, as the case may be) the doors in your building are thin enough that you hear everything that goes on in the hallways whether you’d like to or not.
“Remus!” James exclaims, by the sound of it keeping his friend from re-entering his apartment. “What are you doing back so soon?”
“You sent me to get an egg,” Remus replies drily. “It doesn’t take long.”
“Right, but—I actually forgot. I need flour, too.”
“What the hell do you need flour for? I thought you were making an omelet.”
“Plans change, Moony. Go on, then.”
“You’re going to eat this poor girl out of house and home.”
A laugh. “I think she’s alright with it.”
Your face burns.
“We don’t know if she has flour for you to borrow. How much do you even need?”
“I dunno—um, two cups. Or something like that. And if she doesn’t have it, the two of you can go to the grocery!”
“James.”
“Just get back over there.” James’ voice rises, as though calling down the hall. “And talk to her about books!”
#remus lupin#neighbor!james potter#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x fem!reader#remus lupin x shy!reader#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x y/n#remus lupin x self insert#remus lupin fanfiction#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin fic#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin scenario#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin blurb#remus lupin one shot#remus lupin oneshot#marauders#marauders fanfiction#marauders fandom#the marauders#hp marauders#marauders era#marauders x reader
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BLUR. | N.JM (M)
SYNOPSIS: Waking up to the sunlight blazing onto your face and hungover was one thing. Waking up to the sunlight blazing onto your face, hungover and in a bed that wasn’t your own in nothing but a pair of sweatpants that were obviously not yours, was another and a punishment specifically made for you—your own personal hell.
CONTENT WARNINGS: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. dub-con, Jaemin’s a freak and a little fucked in the head, afab!reader, (ex)boyfriend’s best friend, sex under the influence of alcohol, protected sex (wrap it before you tap it!), sex-tapes, nudes (but make it artsy), face/throat-fucking, dirty-talk, mild possessiveness, mild obsession, smidge of fluff surprisingly, voyeurism and exhibitionism (kinda?), open-ended.
WORD COUNT: 7.5K
note: first of all, happy birthday to one of my favorite leos, Jaemin 💖 idk how many times i’ve looped the song but i think it was enough for me to come up with a fic inspired by it 💀 originally, this was supposed to be posted sooner but hey! Better late than never! Heed the warnings i beg if you don’t like the sound of this then please, you are absolutely free to click off! Other than that, please enjoy the filth ~
“You’re every single thing that I deserve. Maybe that’s too boring. ‘Cause I might say some thing you’ve never heard. Like I did last night, what a blur.” — Blur by Lolo Zouaï

You
hyuck
oh my fucking god HYUCK
WAKE UP
haechan
ugh woman WHA T
You
HELP
haechan
?? are you dying
wait where did you even go last night?
i didnt see u anywhere after like
well i dont remember
You
home
haechan
.
ok how tf am i gonna help with that
You
but its not MY home
and im pretty sure i slept with whoever took me here
haechan
😟
i’ll be at ur place
“Jesus—the guy try to eat you or something?”
You winced, covering the marks left by whoever fucking psycho thought they were a vampire.
Seriously, was all that really necessary? Leaving obvious bite marks and bruises to the point it looked like an animal attempted to maul you beyond recognition? Anyone with a functioning brain would obviously veto that idea in a heartbeat. Anyone with a modicum of chivalry could have stopped themselves from making your neck look like it did.
You were a contributing member to society and the thought of facing endless questions about your otherwise wild night out, at work of all places, was mortifying enough as it is. You had places to be. You had people to meet.
One of those ‘people you had to meet’ happened to be Donghyuck. A constant presence in your day-to-day life and was essentially your best friend. Your ride or die. There should be some bias for one another when it comes to this friendship built from finding each other in bathrooms of college parties with either one’s head stuck in the toilet bowl.
You’ve literally seen each other at your worst, but Donghyuck was a Gemini first through and through. You weren’t one to succumb to the belief of stereotypes, yet Donghyuck proudly wore being two-faced like a badge of honor. He was your best friend, but he was also your worst enemy and never would he miss the opportunity in making you squirm underneath the palpable judgment swimming side-by-side with the curiosity alight in his eyes.
“Does it look that bad?” you asked quietly, just as curious, but leaning more towards your own reassurance.
The loud, grating laughter he let spill past his lips was enough to tell you that, yeah, it’s pretty gnarly and the likelihood of you getting some weird looks was at a moderate high.
“All I’m saying is—” he said then cleared his throat, “—is you’re gonna have to like, use half a tube of your best concealer.” he jeered, taking his time to assess the damage with an amused twitch of his lips before picking up the remote.
Case in point.
Although Donghyuck spoke the truth and nothing but the truth, that didn’t stop you from flicking his ear in retaliation as the last thing you wanted to ruin your mood was Donghyuck’s super helpful (read: useless) input. As if he was any better. You couldn’t count the number of times he found himself in ‘sticky’ situations that even the most promiscuous of people would cover their mouths, scandalized at the many many recounts of (questionable) conquests of getting his dick wet as many times as he could.
(That’s not to say you were completely innocent. Your sexual appetite was at a healthy mid to high. Donghyuck was just shameless. You, on the other hand, were not).
The wounded noise from Donghyuck went ignored as you stood up, stretched your arms up high and headed to the kitchen to get something into your empty stomach.
Waking up to the sunlight blazing onto your face and hungover was one thing.
Waking up to the sunlight blazing onto your face, hungover and in a bed that wasn’t your own in nothing but a pair of sweatpants that were obviously not yours, was another and a punishment specifically made for you—your own personal hell. A thing to note was the sweatpants were from a brand that you haven’t even heard of. Ever. Either this guy’s a fashion snob, or he’s filthy fucking rich, though something in you persisted that he was probably the latter.
No. Scratch that. It’s a hundred percent the latter.
You’ve been here before. Sober during those very few times, to be frank, and you desperately wished that you didn’t know who lived in this pretentiously decorated bachelor’s pad.
You thought waking up in a stranger’s bed was bad? Try waking up in your ex-boyfriend’s best friend’s bed with no recollection of what happened last night. Trying to remember was proven useless when the memories were all but blurry, flashing images you couldn’t for the life of you sharpen with the power of your mind—that was still recovering from the hangover—alone.
It really wasn’t the best morning. It was arguably one of the worst.
Seeing one of his cats perched on top of the highest point of the cat tower in the far corner of the bedroom was already a bad omen in and of itself, slanted eyes locked on your every move and she (you had a faint idea that this was one of his girls) even followed you to the bathroom! Which, okay, wasn’t that awful considering she hadn’t meowed or hissed at you in warning (yet).
All the cat did was hop onto the marble counter of Jaemin’s bathroom, sat back primly and watched you get rid of the accumulated grime on your face before going crazy with the array of skincare the man had out in the open. It was really his fault for leaving you unattended.
Speaking of Jaemin, he was nowhere to be found.
There were no signs of him even as you padded into the wide expanse of the living area. No signs of life in the kitchen either aside from the two other cats Jaemin had in his care and strangely enough, they too didn’t seem to be alarmed by your presence. You’ve only been here a few times with your then boyfriend, Jeno. Played with them a little too. Maybe the cats had sharper memories than you gave them credit for.
All of that aside, Jaemin’s absence was a huge relief on your part. Being drunk five margaritas in around him was embarrassing though still salvageable by a brief but genuine apology. Conversing with him was rare, sure, but the few conversations with him were adequate for you to lump him with one of the good ones.
Yet.
Yet.
This—being in your ex-boyfriend’s best friend’s fucking apartment of all places—felt like there was more to what you initially thought could have happened that made you stay the night.
It’s been so long since you’ve last seen your ex, much less Jaemin, as he wasn’t exactly one to go out as often, but your alcohol-addled brain had momentarily lost its grasp on the supposed built-in survival instinct that you let yourself get whisked away by him.
Possibly let him have his way with you (in your drunken haze) as you thought back to the mild soreness in between your legs.
Whatever the possibilities were, you had no luxury to narrow them down right now. Not when you had bigger problems.
You had to get out of here. Fast.
“Holy shit.”
Was what you heard the very second the grilled cheese and bacon sandwich you planned on sharing was placed on the plate.
At first, you didn’t think much of Donghyuck’s exclamation. Dramatics were his thing and you were used to being subjected to them so often that you barely blinked when Donghyuck followed it up with a sharp gasp. You were just about to write it off as ‘none of your business’—unlike Donghyuck who made sure to make his business everyone else’s—when what he said next made you pause.
“Y/N, you have got to see this.”
Now adding you to the mix got your attention. Picking up the urgent yet intrigued intonation from Donghyuck’s demand was enough to put brunch on the back burner as you rushed back to the small living area. The TV was put on mute. It was the first detail you noticed before pinning your gaze onto your best friend still on the couch and you immediately knew something was wrong with the way his shoulders almost touched his ears from sitting too stiffly.
Donghyuck had your phone in his hand when you sat down beside him which wasn't exactly new to you. He somehow figured out your pass-code (“it was your birth date,” Donghyuck clarified. “It wasn’t that hard to figure out. What do you have against Face ID anyway?”) and you couldn’t find the energy to change it. It wasn't like you had anything to hide. You lived a pretty uneventful life, completely juxtaposing with whatever he had going on at his end, so you didn’t really mind the nosiness.
One look at his face, however, made you reconsider the leniency towards your privacy.
Donghyuck had this innate talent of pissing off people by his many facial expressions alone. He looked like the cat that ate the canary; probably planning on swallowing it down with cream to egg you on further and you just know whatever he had to say—or show in this case—was bound to raise your blood pressure to new heights.
“What,” it was meant to be a question, and the annoyance that managed to creep into the mono-syllable was amusing enough to Donghyuck that the annoying grin grew into almost splitting his face in half.
You rolled your eyes so hard that you wondered why you weren’t stuck staring at your brain from how often you did this at his expense. “Seriously, what?”
Donghyuck silently handed your phone over, still looking like the devil’s incarnate that it was almost an eerie resemblance, yet you still humored him.
You soon found that there was no humor in this situation.
All the budding annoyance had come to a screeching halt the moment your phone found its rightful home in your grasp.
From your abysmal screen-time, you should be used to its lightness, yet the device felt heavier than it should. It was like having the weight of the world in your palms and what’s worse, you could feel your blood running cold in real time as you peered down at the small screen leering right back at you, taunting you.
What greeted you was the opened camera roll that somehow accumulated pictures upon pictures of you stripped down to your most promiscuous state of undress. The sight was daunting to say the least that some crazed part of you thought your phone had become sentient; goading you with each flick of your thumb to scroll through them, further stripping you of your modesty. As if it was a digital flip book of yourself, illustrating you and one of you rare conquests of hunting down warm body to fuck around with.
The sheer amount of them was almost laughable, just imagining the person on the other side of the lens doing their absolute damnedest in making sure no small detail was out of place; that you came out debauched, yet still gorgeous enough to overlook the depravity of their nature.
You weren’t sure if this could be compared to nudes. Not when there were some traces of artistry behind each photo that if you were less than sane, you would have your thanks at the ready for making the vision—whatever it was—come alive with an iPhone camera.
There was a joke begging to be voiced out somewhere. A joke your best friend would immensely appreciate knowing it was centered around you and your bad decisions, however, that thought was quickly forgotten when something else caught your eye.
A video. Videos, you’ve come to find out as you scrolled further. Almost never ending with the amount that it was overwhelming compared to that of the photos lacking depth and movement.
The state of the thumbnails didn’t help ease the heavy feeling in your gut either.
Each and every single one of them could very well belong on the number of porn platforms you were vaguely aware of. They left nothing to the imagination where you could just tell what obscenities you—namely drunk you—were up to despite having no recollection of this ever happening. Just how much alcohol did you let in your system that you blacked out the entire night? This was one of the many mysteries that will continue to haunt you unless you get some clarity soon.
It would be a lie if you said you weren’t the least bit curious of your own drunken thought process (you were still processing what you were seeing, actually) and it was obvious your best friend was just as curious, impatiently so that he snatched your phone back, chose one form the myriad of video clips and pressed play, all under a second or two.
“Dude, what the fuck?” Donghyuck earned an elbow to his side for his haste, but all he did was shush you and moved the phone closer for a better view. As if an almost seven-inch screen could grant a cinematic experience, but you’ll take what you could get.
“There you go.”
And there you go, body locking up the moment the awfully familiar, deep and roughened voice came out of the phone’s speakers.
A simple sentence spoken with a cadence so sluggish that you had to fight hard to remind yourself that he didn’t always sound like he was forcing you to unravel with his words alone. Jaemin just had this peculiar habit of putting half the effort into enunciating his words almost to the point where he sounded lazy and you assumed it was the alcohol that made this habit of his more pronounced than ever.
The alcohol turned him into someone, hell, some otherworldly being that the more you heard him speak, the likelihood of a blood vessel popping due to how wound up you’ve progressively become was at a high. It was downright ridiculous how instantaneous the effect was, and what followed would soon have you internally begging to be smite by God himself.
“It took you three tries to swallow me down without gagging.” Though you couldn’t see him, there was, no doubt, a smile on his face, listening to his delivery alone. All sharp and condescending that you couldn’t help but wince at the immediate reboot of your brain where you could vividly imagine the scrape of his teeth along your throat—specifically the places bruised with the indents; marks of his canines being the most prominent.
At least you got to confirm just who the ‘wild animal’ was behind the damage to your neck, yet you still couldn’t map the exact thought process justifying Jaemin’s carelessness.
“You’re that eager to please, aren’t you?”
Jaemin sounded like he was demanding an immediate answer, but there was just one problem.
He wasn’t going to get anything from you. How can he when his cock restricted you from talking? The most he was going to get was a series of garbled noises, just like the wet squelches from fucking into your mouth.
“Of course you are. I can see why Jeno kept you around for as long as he could.” Jaemin chuckled, moving his hand from where it previously rested on top of your head to cup your jaw. “Feeling full, huh?” and you could hear how smug he was, laughing quietly when all you could do was whine when his fingers tightened their grip on your bulging cheeks, no doubt wanting the wet heat of your mouth to squeeze around his dick tighter, or feel how imposing his size was for the sake of his ego.
“I could barely fit in your mouth a moment ago,” the groan he let out was deep from within his chest, guttural as if he was fighting to keep himself controlled while bullying himself deeper into your willing (?) throat until you gagged around his girth, shaky hands scrambling to find purchase on his thighs as if to keep yourself grounded. “Now here you are, taking it like it’s nothing. Like you were made for this. All you needed was a little push, didn’t you, baby?”
It took real talent to come off as an asshole through voice alone, and Jaemin was nothing short of talented. He really did fit the narrative. It’s always the ones with the (admittedly) pretty faces that have something to hide under the false pretense of pleasantry, and it just so happened that the ‘thing’ Jaemin wanted to keep under wraps was how much of a scheming freak he actually was.
Back then, you were just part of the majority who was ignorant to what lies underneath. Now here you are, experiencing Jaemin’s depraved fantasies first hand.
You should have known. The signs were quite literally there with the way he looked at you all night before you were consumed by the effects of alcohol. Even in the sea of people crowding the club, you‘ve managed to catch the intensity swirling in the darkness of his eyes stuck on you no matter where you ended up.
Jaemin was there. In the corners. In the shadows. Jaemin was everywhere. Watching and waiting to strike.
That thought alone should have been enough to unsettle you right to your very core, yet all it did was raise questions. Tons of them, considering this had been going on before you even got together with your then boyfriend, Jeno. You had thought that perhaps Jaemin had harbored some type of protectiveness over you seeing you got to know him first, but your prior naivety didn’t let you think much on it further. Not when you were swept up by the sweeter than sweet smiles and soon entranced by a pair of eyes that put the winking moon to shame.
Nevertheless Jaemin still kept a watchful eye, bid his time carefully and now that his best friend was out of the picture, perhaps it was the perfect time to strike.
And that he did, leaving the photos and videos behind in his wake.
“Jaemin?” Donghyuck hissed, completely ignoring the obscene noises blasting from your phone on full volume because apparently he wasn’t immersed enough with it half-way up. Where your apartment provided decent acoustics to amplify the sound. “Jaemin Na? Your ex's best friend? That Jaemin?”
You held your face in shame and groaned, trying to make it seem like you weren’t the least bit affected by Jaemin’s own mix of pleasured sounds going hand-in-hand with your muffled desperation. “Say ‘Jaemin’ one more time and I’ll punch you in the throat.” Your face was hot to the touch and you didn’t want to know just what you looked like to Donghyuck.
The memory of last night was faint, yes, but it did overwhelm you all the same to the point where you were starting to tear up from sheer embarrassment.
Donghyuck, ever so keen, caught the sign of distress and composed himself. “You were with Jaemin last night?” He asked, whispering.
“Oh, I don’t know,” you answered, sarcasm weighing heavily on each syllable as you aimed your grimace towards the video still playing (seriously, how long was it?). “Is that just my face deep-faked onto some poor random girl? You tell me.”
His pleased expression twisted at the snark, lips parting to refute you with the same vitriol until a rather loud, impossibly hard to ignore moan tore through the impending tension.
Both of you looked down just in time for Jaemin to pull out of your abused mouth with a wet, disgusting sound and lord, not only did he have an impressive size, his dick was pretty too. Pretty in a way it shouldn’t be, but it’s like Jaemin was solely born to go against what one should expect in men and their anatomy, which wasn’t much to begin with, let’s be real. Guess the universe did have its favorites and what misfortune it was that it had to be you stuck with one of them. Literally.
It was like a sick punishment pushed onto you, being faced with the harsh truth of Jaemin having his reasons backed up and giving him free reign to act and talk like he was the shit. His hands were just as big as everything about him from his stature to his personality. Made it seem like his cock was nothing to gawk at until you—you in the video—shuffled closer, having it stand ramrod straight right in front of your face.
As if the Jaemin in the video heard you, he laughed as he brought the camera closer to his cock and your face in tandem. You could tell he was getting close, the labored breaths and jostling of the footage were obvious signs amidst the borderline frantic strokes.
“Open up, sweetheart,” he grunted, tapping your puffy lips with his cockhead. “and stick your tongue out for me, will you—yeah. That’s good. Perfect. You’re perfect—fuck!”
Thick ropes of pearly white painted your face as Jaemin let out a loud, drawn-out moan, forcing more out with rough strokes and most of it shooting into your awaiting mouth. You kept your eyes open for the entirety of it in spite of the obscene amount of cum dripping from your cheeks, nose and even an eyebrow. In fact, there was so much of it that even Donghyuck voiced his own astonishment right when you swallowed, only to pry your lips open once more and leave Jaemin to milk himself until the very last drop, not letting any of it go to waste.
It seemed you did good with the forethought, Jaemin making his appreciation known with a soft coo as if he wasn’t spouting filth while you were literally gagging for it.
God, you looked absolutely destroyed.
And eerily enough, sex-tape!Jaemin finished off the thought with a breathy, “you’ve never looked better.”
Inky tear-tracks of your mascara marred what was once the smoothed canvas of your face. You took much care in making sure your makeup was almost flawless and it was a shame that Jaemin thought the complete opposite and decided that smearing your lipstick along your mouth with a gross mix of your spit, tears and his cum was much more entertaining—as if this was all just a sick game to him; a game of how long would it take to strip you off of your dignity by making a mess out of you. Twice.
“Fuck. You look…” Jaemin trailed off as he held you by the jaw, damp skin easily caving underneath his fingertips to keep you in place and took his time to admire his masterpiece. It was deceptively tender, the way he went about tilting your head from side-to-side that just as you thought this was where the humiliation ended, realizing the extent of what you had done last night, the debauched version of you decided to speak.
“How—how do I look?” You slurred. Round, glazed up eyes peering up in earnest and that was all it took for Jaemin to let your phone tumble from his grasp in favor of hauling you up. The footage was all sorts of skewed, but by some odd law of physics involved, it made sure to show how Jaemin went in for a kiss that was all sorts of messy and heated, not minding the fact that he could taste himself with every push of your tongue against his.
He pulled back just for a moment, letting out a breathy chuckle and the last thing you heard before the video saw its end was a hoarse, “beautiful. Gorgeous. Unreal. Mine,” before it stopped and jumped back to show its thumbnail.
You let the both of you marinate in the silence that followed afterwards, with you gathering your wits as your worst half gently placed your phone down onto the coffee table.
“Oh my god.” you settled on saying, completely mortified.
“Oh my god.” Donghyuck repeated, sounding all too gleeful.
It almost looked like Donghyuck was impressed with what happened in the past five minutes when you slowly turned to face each other. “Wow,” he drawled, immediately raising your hackles at the god-awful sight of his self-righteous smirk. “and I thought I was the slut between us two.”
“Oh, you still are,” you bit back, not letting him get the upper-hand. “Three people in one night? I’m surprised your dick’s still attached to you.” or that he didn’t contract an STD for that matter, but small miracles could be given to anyone, you supposed. Even to a menace.
“You know what they say, the ‘s’ in slut stands for ‘safe’!”
“Literally no one has said that.”
“I literally just did.”
You dead-panned. “Get out.”
“You’re so boring,” he whined, getting up to head to the kitchen to probably gobble up the grilled sandwich you had made. “Well,” the muffled continuation said just as much. “maybe not since you fucked your ex-boyfriend’s best friend. Who would have thought you’d let Jaemin hit?”
You whirled around to glower at him, half for eating what was yours and half at his disguised jeering. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Y/N, I’m a dude,” he said slowly, like you were stupid. Maybe you were. “We can tell when a guy is interested.”
“You think Jaemin’s into me?”
Donghyuck’s initial reaction was to arch an eyebrow as he paused mid-chew, again, as if he could not believe you were this slow on the up-take. It was starting to piss you off, honestly, that he knew something you didn’t and was just waiting for you to piece everything together.
“You couldn’t tell?” He only gets an unimpressed stare to get on with it which he shrugged at. “Nevermind, you were too busy making googoo eyes at Jeno to pay attention. That worked at least, ‘cause soon enough, you were hanging off of his arm.”
You huffed, conceding with a roll of your eyes. “Fine. You got me there.”
Donghyuck scoffed, “‘course I do. Seriously though, we thought that you’d end up with Jaemin. He’s usually straight-forward with things like this, but since Jeno was there… well, y’know, bro-code or whatever the fuck.” He took a generous bite from the sandwich before placing it back down on the plate and dusting his hands from the crumbs. “Thing is though, he never really stopped looking at you? I’m sure you know how shameless he is with staring.”
Knew? You’ve caught him staring a handful times in the past and his shamelessness knew no bounds either. Not once did Jaemin appear remotely embarrassed meeting your eyes as he would smile each time, hold the eye contact for longer than what you would deem appropriate before moving his eyes elsewhere, and you knew that in no time, his gaze would be burning holes into your back again.
You’ve grown used to it anyway. It was strange, yes, but Jaemin never really did anything beyond what could make you uncomfortable. Even Jeno laughed it off when it was casually brought up during your past conversations, not really bothered by his best friend’s odd quirk.
“I can’t blame him,” you remembered him saying. “You’re really beautiful. I’d probably consider looking at you as one of my favorite past-times.” and safe to say, you did appreciate the comment, and Jeno definitely appreciated the soul-sucking blowjob you gave him if the strings of praises tangled with the ‘I love you’s’ were anything to go by.
None of that was relayed to Donghyuck though. Your knowledge on the matter wasn’t his business, nor did you think it was that of a big deal. So what if your ex-boyfriend’s best friend liked to keep his eyes on you? That didn’t mean anything. Just like what happened last night didn’t mean anything. It didn't have to mean anything.
It was a one-time thing and you were certain that it’ll take the Earth’s revolution around the sun to see him again. Perhaps never, if you played your cards right.
And watching your own sex-tape (accidental, or not) with Donghyuck won’t happen ever again when you made the mistake of trailing your eyes downwards.
You were very far from impressed, scowling at him. “I can see your dick through your pants, Hyuck. You’re gross.”
He at least had the decency to appear sheepish from you pointing out his body’s reaction. “Oh don’t like you weren’t the least bit turned on from that too.”
You flipped him off with both hands, face burning.
Donghyuck cackled and then waved you over to finish half of the sandwich.
Clearly, there was something in you that refused to see the bigger picture.
You couldn’t help it. You weren’t exactly one to get swept up in the assumptions made by you or the other people in your life that had their rare times of indulging the delusions that came hand-in-hand with them. And that’s all they were. Harmless assumptions and delusions that would be forgotten by the end of the day. Sooner, if you could help it.
So why were you sitting in the middle of your bed, obsessively scrolling through the videos taken from last night?
Perhaps you could blame it all on the insatiable curiosity that never really left even as Donghyuck said his farewell an hour or so ago.
Jaemin’s motive for filming last night’s drunken rendezvous was still—is still—no doubt, a mystery. Starting from why did he use your phone? It would have made much more sense if he used his. There was the possibility that it might have been his phone and had the forethought of airdropping everything to you for reasons unknown, but with a quick check of the details, nope. It was yours. Jaemin’s phone model was the newest one on the market, while yours was at least two years due for an upgrade, pretty much debunking your theory.
Which landed you in this position, looking through your camera roll for any hints that could shed light on his possible motives. Anyone who would find themselves in this dilemma had every reason to be angry. It was normal to feel outraged going through what you did last night and you could only pray to whatever higher being was up there that no one else knew what went on and if Jaemin had his own duplicates.
But—well. Anger was far from what fueled all this. Confusion more like and it only grew when you skimmed through the videos until one caught your eye.
This time, it was you holding the phone, your grasp being significantly shakier, but Jaemin didn’t mind. Not when he was rather preoccupied with his head stuck in between your quivering thighs, eating you out to his heart’s content. No, really. It was like he made it his life’s mission to give you the best head of your life with the way you were letting out a cacophony of pleasured sounds to which Jaemin looked particularly proud off, evident with the way he was leering at you through the screen.
Jaemin had always come off as intimidating with his looks alone; a soft but angular face with strong eyebrows framing the dark pits of his eyes and a smile full of perfect white teeth so wicked it could even put the devil to shame if he tried harder. It was common to be put-off by his intensity at first. He had always sought out to give off a strong impression, but it wouldn’t be long before he opened up, gracing everyone with the sweet side of him.
And sweet he was, with the way he was looking at you with the mess of saliva and your wetness coating his lips and chin. Even the tip of nose was dripping of it, yet you thought he was absolutely breathtaking that the dazzling smile did nothing but make him so much more.
They say that eyes are the window to the soul. That you can guess what was going through someone’s head if you dare peer into them longer. It was purely for the sake of uncovering answers on your part, but you weren’t sure if that was what you were searching for anymore.
He was doing unspeakable things to you, yes. That much was apparent with his mindless slurping and the pleased moans reverberating when you so much as tugged at his hair, or squeezed his head with your thighs. It’s like he was getting off from you getting off and it was all sorts of filthy when a dollop of his spit caught onto your clit just for the sake of it.
But his eyes were telling the complete opposite of his ministrations. Dark as they were, they held something soft in them. Gentle. Tender—dare you say it, enamored. Completely taken by how you were blatantly using him, rutting against that sinful tongue while simultaneously fucking yourself onto his thick fingers as he did the absolute most to match the desperate pace you were setting to chase your release.
The soft spoken praises fell so easily from his mouth. Slickened lips covering your inner thighs with kisses and gentle, teasing nips as he spoke sweet-nothings that were no less still filthy, yet his eyes still remained the same. Darkened even more with his blown out pupils, but the softness remained swimming in those endless pits of coffee brown sweeter than its bitter aftertaste; warm when Jaemin graced you with a lipped smile.
Even as Jaemin had you face down and ass up, the warm glow in his gaze stayed. Hips slammed into you with reckless abandon that with each push, you hiked higher and higher up his sheets that you had to hold onto his headboard to keep yourself in place. You assumed the phone was placed somewhere on his end table for the clear view, or else you wouldn’t be able to see the warmth light up his face too.
It’s truly a wonder how you were able to witness how easy his emotions took over his features. More so when he took it upon himself to manhandle you on your back, then did you see how easily Jaemin shed that hardass exterior of his.
That didn’t mean he had let up though, oh no. He was still rough with his treatment as you watched his hand come down onto your thigh with a loud smack before pushing at the back of your knees and until your thighs were pressed against your chest to fuck you deeper, harder, now that he raised one leg to get more leverage.
Jaemin graced you with a cruel smirk when you cried out from a pointed jerk of his hips. “Imagine how fucking pissed I was when Jeno snatched you up before I did.” That was news to you and it was more shocking that the man admitted it himself just as you were about to piece things together. “I saw you first. I befriended you first—fuck, I thought I made it obvious that I wanted you.” You could only let out a helpless mewl when he slowed down to scowl at you. “We’re friends, right?”
When you didn’t answer right away, a hand wrapped tightly around your throat. “Answer me, sweetheart. While I’m still nice enough to give you what you want.”
“Yes,” you sobbed, holding onto his wrist and you were exactly sure if drunk you wanted to keep it there or not. “We’re friends.”
Jaemin smiled something mean, “then how come I was the last to know that you chose Jeno over me?”
“I didn’t know—“
“You didn’t know? I’ve—” he cuts himself off with an incredulous laugh. “Right, how silly of me. You were too busy giving Jeno your attention.” Jaemin leaned in closer. “Maybe I should send this to him,” he mused, gesturing towards the phone with his head. “How’s that sound?” And humiliate yourself even further? You would rather die a painless death.
“No! Please no!” You could see yourself struggle, yet Jaemin with his sheer size and strength had no problem in keeping you pinned down.
“Why not? It’s not like you’re together or anything. Will it be that humiliating for you? There’s no reason to be, not when you're this gorgeous. Nothing wrong with being a slut either.”
“I’m—I’m not.”
“Oh yes you are, baby. You let me fuck you, didn’t you? Your ex’s best friend? Showing him all this could make him realize why he wasn’t able to keep you. Jeno didn’t know what you wanted. He didn’t know what you needed either. Me? I could give you both and more.” He sounded so sure about it. Looked sure about it too as he picked up the pace and settled on a brutal rhythm, punching more moans out of you. “All you have to do is just ask for it.”
“You’re fuh—fu—cking crazy,” was all you could say. It seemed you were starting to get light headed with how Jaemin still had a tight grip around your neck. Like a necklace choker that won't ever come off.
“I know I am, sweetheart, but don’t worry. I wasn't being serious. I’d kill anyone who sees you like this,” It was a threat and a promise all molded into one and hearing that strangely made your heart skip a beat. His face was drawn into something serious and darkened when he said, “Jeno included. He had his chance and he fucked all that to hell, but me? I’m not making the same mistake.”
The footage kept on rolling after Jaemin spilled into the condom, just a few seconds after you knocked out-cold from what seemed to be the most intense orgasm you’ve ever had—not that you could remember—in your life. Kept on rolling as he kissed your forehead before getting up to cleanup in the en suite. And rolled, and rolled, and rolled.
You were fully convinced that your one-night stand completely forgot the existence of your phone recording the post-sex ritual happening right before your eyes. It was kind of funny though, like watching a risqué vlog illustrating the proper etiquette when it came to aftercare.
Jaemin did just that, with the same balmy look in his eyes and the inherent tenderness in his actions as he took care of you even in your slumbering state.
He could have done better with dressing you up though, but you could understand that the exhaustion probably crept up at him when he didn’t even question the sweatpants he swiped up from the laundry hamper. Still, he tucked you in and gently kissed your cheek before shuffling over and picking up your phone, only to switch to the front camera, smile and blow a kiss.
With a huff, you fell back onto your bed, ruminating what Jaemin left behind and burning in shame and something else that you wouldn’t want to acknowledge.
It was some sort of confession, wasn’t it? Unconventional definitely, but the idea was there, glaring at you in minute-long clips and you couldn’t really think of your next move. Jaemin was still an enigma for sure and calling him didn’t sound like a good idea. At least at the moment it didn’t. You really had no clue if you should simply wait for him to reach out himself, but that's besides the point.
What you did know was that some part of you thought it was a shame that last night’s memory was still quite the blur. You couldn’t recall how Jaemin made you feel with his touch and you weren’t sure if gratitude should be even considered for him leaving you of last night’s evidence.
This was all too much. Jaemin was too much and you couldn’t think much now when you have plans coming up soon.
And if you came on your fingers twice from simply looking at the unmistaken adoration lifting Jaemin’s face as he had his way with you, then that was between you and God alone.
“Couldn’t we do this some other time?”
Donghyuck clicked his tongue as he pulled out a chair for you. “You know how Giselle is and to be fair, she’s been begging for us to meet up. She mentioned she’s bringing someone with her too.”
“That’s fine.” Probably one of your acquaintances. “But she couldn’t choose another day where I don’t feel and look like shit?”
“Relax. No one in here knows that you’ve been fucked six ways ‘til Sunday last night.”
He said it like he was talking about the weather, all the while scanning the menu nonchalantly as you prayed that no one else heard him. Donghyuck was right though. You did make sure to hide all evidence (mainly the marks on your neck), and the slight limp in your steps and it was such a relief on your part that you haven’t received any odd looks as of yet. If you were to get some concerning looks, it would be because of how fidgety you were. As if you were just waiting for Jaemin to come out and strike. Ugh, perhaps your body did remember some of last night.
“You’re fine, Y/N,” Donghyuck reassured, patting your thigh gently. “What are you gonna get? I’m thinking of steak. We could share each other’s food or something too.”
“Yeah, sounds nice—“
“Y/N! Girl, it’s been so long!”
Both you and Donghyuck looked up just in time to see Giselle quickly making her way over to where you both sat with a dazzling smile.
“Gigi, hi!”
The man beside you rolled his eyes as you rose up and kissed Giselle on the cheek, “I’m here too, y’know.”
She laughed and sat on the seat right across from him. “Yes, yes, hello to you too, Hyuck.” Giselle looked as if she came alone, noticing that no one was trailing behind her.
“I thought you were with someone?” you asked, handing over the menu to her.
She thanked you with a quick smile and got to scanning it. “He’s still parking his car. He insisted I go in first.”
He?
“He?” trust your best friend to voice out exactly what you were thinking. “Who’s he?” You couldn’t remember the last time she brought someone for you to meet. Usually, this was her way of checking whether the person would be worth her time. As all close friends would do. You did the same with Jeno and what a shame you guys didn’t even last that long.
“Some guy I met recently,” Giselle hummed. “He’s nice, I promise.”
The conversation flowed smoothly after that and you decided to order for everybody after Giselle mentioned that her ‘friend’ would most likely get the same thing as Donghyuck. You really couldn’t follow along much—still reeling from everything, really—but it seemed to be a heated discussion from how worked up Donghyuck was slowly becoming at each of Giselle’s rebuttals.
Your attention moved to your phone at that point, looking through your socials while simultaneously reading through the work emails you might have missed.
“Took you long enough, Jaemin.”
You froze.
Jaemin?
From that second, you concluded that you were just hearing things. Maybe you misheard Giselle and that it was some guy that had a similar sounding name to him. He wasn’t the only guy with a given name starting with ‘Jae’, right? Jaemin wasn’t the only Jaemin in the world either.
However, the universe might as well bring your nightmares to life because looking up from your phone, the same Jaemin Na was there. Sitting across from you a polite tilt of his lips.
Though as he looked down, taking a gander at your phone with shining eyes before meeting your gaze head on, the smile grew sharper, sinister and you dread whatever was coming next.
“Guys, this is Jaemin. Jaemin, Donghyuck and Y/N.”
“Oh, we’ve met.” Jaemin leaned forward, resting his cheek on his palm while you swallowed thickly. “It’s nice to see you again, sweetheart.”
“Well,” Donghyuck started, breaking the silence. “It could have gone worse.”
“What’s worse than meeting your one-night stand the very next day?”
“Jaemin telling everyone that he slept with you?”
“You’re useless, actually,” you dead-panned, plopping heavily onto your couch. “Seriously, that was probably the most embarrassing dinner ever. Poor Giselle probably thought that I didn’t want to see her.” Your hands flew to your face to hide, moaning in despair.
To be fair, it wasn’t entirely the worst situation you’ve been in. At least Jaemin was cordial enough to act normal aside from the fact that he still tried to burn holes into your profile when you focused on either Donghyuck or Giselle as you talked over the food. Jaemin didn’t say much either, and spoke when spoken to, yet his presence was so domineering that even pretending that he didn't exist was rather difficult that you just settled on acknowledging him out of politeness.
Never mind the fact that he looked like he wanted to eat you up and swallow you whole right then and there. Then again, that’s how he looked most of the time so it brought comfort that there was a fifty-fifty chance that you were wrong.
Donghyuck gave you a sympathetic pat on the head, “don’t worry about it. You can say sorry to her and she’ll be fine, and it’s not like you’ll be seeing Jaemin any time soon.”
At that moment, your phone chimed and with the whole dinner fiasco, you immediately assumed it was probably Giselle checking up on you. You did act a little weird for everyone’s tastes and you were kind of waiting for her to bring it up so you could explain yourself and express your deepest apologies for acting out-of-character.
See, it wasn't Giselle and you cursed Donghyuck in your head for jinxing it.
Donghyuck took one good look at your face, the corner of his lips tilting downwards in concern. “What'd Giselle say?”
You shook your head and handed it over to him.
“Oh my god.”
Jaemin Na
hey
can i come over?
:)
Shit.

note: this is dedicated to Aria for being just as insane as me when it comes to Jaemin 🫡
TAGLIST: @jaylaxies @celeste-hoon @en-myworld
#FINALLY IVE FINISHED WRITING THIS this was supposed to come out a month ago lol oopsies#na jaemin x reader#na jaemin one shot#na jaemin smut#jaemin x reader#jaemin one shot#jaemin smut#nct x reader#nct one shot#nct smut#nct dream x reader#nct dream one shot#nct dream smut#nics: one shots
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Could I please request Spencer & Fem Reader based on the episode 9x24 when he gets shot and reader is super worried about him so is comforting him and doing all she can to make sure he’s ok and just fretting over him and on the jet she’s helping him in and just sitting with him next to the couch, brushing his hair so he sleeps. Just lots of cuddles. Maybe overbearing for Spencer because he’s not used to being the one taken care of since it’s usually vise versa. Thanks!!
Wounds: Physical & Emotional
Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!reader
Category: angst, hurt
Warnings/Includes: aftermath of Spencer getting shot, reader being overbearing, Spencer snapping, no happy ending
Word count: 2.1k
a/n: hiii i hope this is okay <33 i needed some angst so this was perfect
main masterlist
The atmosphere in the hospital room was filled with a quiet tension, the sterile smell of antiseptics mingling with the dull hum of machines. Spencer lay there, eyes half-open, a little pale and looking both exhausted and grateful just to be alive. His neck, wrapped in fresh bandages, still bore the marks of his ordeal, a stark reminder of how close he’d come to something irreversible.
You stood by his bedside, fingers gently resting on the thin hospital blanket, as if the mere act of touching it could somehow channel some of your strength to him. You'd been pacing the hallway for what felt like hours, running through every worst-case scenario, but finally seeing him, hearing the faint sound of his breathing steady and rhythmic—it brought a wave of relief so overwhelming it nearly took you to your knees.
As his eyes fluttered open, a soft but tired smile curved on his lips when he saw you there. “You… you really didn’t have to stay,” he murmured, his voice a bit strained, weakened from both the injury and the exhaustion that came with it.
You shook your head immediately, your hand instinctively reaching for his, fingers wrapping around his gently. “Don’t even say that, Spencer,” you whispered, your voice thick with emotion, each word infused with the worry you’d been bottling up since the moment you’d found out he’d been hurt. “There’s nowhere else I would be. You… I was so scared.”
He squeezed your hand weakly, his thumb tracing a small, reassuring pattern against your knuckles. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "I know... I know how it must've felt, seeing me like that."
“No, no,” you replied quickly, shaking your head. “You don’t have to apologize for anything. None of this was your fault. You just… you’re always putting yourself out there for everyone else, and… Spencer, I can’t lose you. Not like that.”
His gaze softened as he looked up at you, the slight sheen of tears glistening in your eyes. He’d seen you in countless stressful situations, through endless cases and late-night work sessions, but this—this was different. “I’m still here,” he assured, his voice barely above a whisper, but steady. “I’m still here.”
You couldn’t stop yourself from reaching out and brushing a loose strand of hair from his forehead, your fingertips lingering, just relieved to feel the warmth of his skin beneath them. “You have no idea how glad I am to hear you say that,” you replied, your voice catching. “I didn’t… I didn’t know if I’d get to.”
He closed his eyes for a moment, leaning into your touch, letting himself be comforted by your presence. The weight of what he’d been through hung between you both, unspoken yet deeply felt. It was as though your silent worry, your prayers for his survival, had wrapped around him, bringing him back.
“Are you… are you comfortable? Do you need anything?” you asked, your voice barely louder than a whisper, but still filled with all the care and concern that had carried you through those agonizing hours of waiting.
He chuckled softly, a little hoarse, but there was a warmth in his eyes as he shook his head. “Just having you here is… more than enough,” he replied, his hand squeezing yours a little more firmly, a silent acknowledgment of how much it meant to him that you’d stayed, that you were there.
Your hand drifted from his forehead to his cheek, your thumb softly tracing the edge of his jaw, and for a moment, he simply closed his eyes, letting himself rest, letting himself lean on you.
“Promise me,” you said softly, breaking the quiet that had settled over you both. “Promise me you’ll be more careful next time, that… that you won’t go scaring me like this again.”
He opened his eyes, looking up at you, a small, apologetic smile tugging at his lips. “I’ll try,” he whispered. “But you know me…”
You rolled your eyes, a reluctant smile of your own finally breaking through the worry. “Yeah, I do,” you murmured, shaking your head fondly. “Which is exactly why I’ll be here, making sure you keep that promise.”
—
Your concern for Spencer had taken on a life of its own, a constant, consuming presence that followed him from the hospital back to work and even into the comfort of his own home. Every glance his way was laden with worry, every touch a check for signs of strain or pain, an endless stream of small but deeply attentive gestures. It seemed you couldn’t stop yourself from fretting over him, as if that watchful care alone could ensure his safety and recovery.
On the jet, you were never far from his side. When he tried to settle into the couch, you followed, bringing a small pillow and blanket, making sure he was comfortable, even sitting right beside him as if to act as a physical buffer against anything that might cause him pain.
“Let me know if you need anything,” you whispered for what felt like the tenth time, fingers gently brushing a stray curl from his forehead. You stayed close, sometimes pulling a chair beside him, sometimes gently brushing your fingers through his hair in a rhythm that would lull him to sleep. Every time he shifted or opened his eyes, he found you right there, watching him with that same blend of worry and tenderness.
But back at home, your concern reached new levels. You simply couldn’t bear the idea of leaving him to fend for himself—not after what he’d just gone through. Any movement he made was met with your insistent, gentle intervention. “No, no,” you’d say softly but firmly when he reached for the coffee pot or attempted to carry anything from the kitchen. “I’ve got it. You’re supposed to be resting.” You’d guide him back to the couch or bed, a hand on his shoulder as if you thought he might collapse any moment if left unattended.
He found himself surrounded by the constant reminders of your care: you’d already brought him fresh coffee, placed his favorite books within easy reach, even left snacks and water close by. You practically fussed over him like he was made of glass, which at first he found touching. There was an odd but comforting warmth in how your love translated into these little gestures of support.
In the quiet intimacy of his apartment, you’d taken to accompanying him into the bathroom, even the shower, ensuring he was never alone. “I just… I can’t bear to leave you alone yet,” you’d said with a nervous laugh the first time, reaching for his hand. “It makes me feel better, okay?”
Spencer, both surprised and touched, had reluctantly agreed, though he couldn’t deny the awkwardness. You watched him carefully as he bathed, helping him wash himself, bringing him his towel, even brushing his hair afterward with the same attention you give every one of his movements.
Every small thing, even the routine act of bathing, became a moment for you to ensure his well-being. And while it was comforting, he found himself increasingly confined by your constant care.
Finally, it became too much. Spencer, who had always prided himself on his independence, was beginning to feel suffocated, trapped by the very love that usually gave him comfort and strength. He’d always been the one to look after others, the quiet pillar of support, and the sudden inversion had been tolerable at first. But as the days wore on, he found himself unable to breathe under the weight of it.
One evening, after yet another shower where you hovered nearby, he reached a breaking point. Just as he reached for the towel, he looked up seeing you already holding it, his face was now laced with frustration and fatigue. “Can’t you… can’t you just give me a little space?” he snapped, his voice louder than he intended, sharp enough to startle you.
The words hung in the air, and you looked at him, taken aback by the sudden tension in his voice. He sighed, running a hand through his hair, the frustration evident as he struggled to put his feelings into words. “I know you’re worried about me—I know. But you won’t even let me bathe alone,” he continued, his tone edged with an exasperation that mirrored how he felt. “I can’t even think for five minutes without you hovering!”
You took a shaky breath, hurt and confusion clouding your expression as you tried to process his outburst. “I… I just wanted to make sure you were okay,” you said softly, your voice breaking with the vulnerability you’d tried so hard to keep hidden.
Spencer’s gaze never softened, “I know you’re worried, and I want to appreciate it, I do. But I need time to myself. I need to feel like I can still do something without help. I need space from you!” he raised his voice again.
You flinched as your heart sank, realizing how tightly you’d been holding on to the fear of losing him, how it had manifested in every act of love, every worried glance, every touch that you’d thought was comforting. You nodded, stepping back a little, trying to offer him the space he so clearly needed. “I’m sorry,” you whispered, eyes dropping to the floor. “I… I’ll give you that space.”
As you quietly closed the bathroom door behind you, Spencer felt a calmness settle over him, a rare feeling of unencumbered space. He hadn’t realized until that moment just how much the attention—though well-meaning and deeply appreciated—had begun to weigh on him, like an invisible net keeping him grounded. The soft click of the door seemed to signal a return to normalcy, to a routine he thought he’d lost somewhere in the haze of his injury.
But what he didn’t realize was how deeply his outburst had hurt you, how you’d clung so desperately to the idea of keeping him safe, only to feel dismissed, even resented, for the very care you’d thought he needed.
Spencer felt lighter as he brushed his hair, each stroke a small declaration of independence. He took his time shaving, enjoying the familiar ritual. He finished, splashing cold water on his face, feeling as if he’d reclaimed a part of himself, a small but significant piece of control.
Satisfied, he wrapped himself in a fresh towel and stepped into the bedroom, thinking of nothing but how good it felt to finally be able to tend to himself. But the moment he crossed the threshold, a chill settled over him. His eyes flicked to the small armchair in the corner, the one that had become a fixture for your bag during your stayover, always waiting quietly, a reminder of your presence and your watchful care. Except now, the chair sat empty. Your bag was gone.
His heart stilled, a sinking feeling creeping into his chest. Quickly, he threw on clothes, barely fastening the buttons of his shirt before moving through the apartment, calling out your name, his voice echoing through the silent rooms. “Y/N?”
He stepped into the living room, glancing around in hopes you were just out of sight, maybe near the kitchen or just down the hall. But there was no answer, no sound, just an aching quiet that pressed in on him like a vise.
“Y/N!” he called again, louder this time, almost pleading. But the silence that met him felt crushing. His mind whirled with dread, memories of the sharpness in his tone, the flash of hurt in your eyes just before you’d turned away. The realization of what he’d done, what he’d said, crashed over him with a painful clarity. In his desperate need for solitude, he hadn’t stopped to consider what his words might mean to you, hadn’t thought of how they might cut deep after all you’d done to care for him.
The hollow ache in his chest grew as he scanned the empty room, his mind replaying each moment you’d been there, every touch, every comforting smile. He could still feel the warmth of your hand in his, the gentle brush of your fingers through his hair. The thought that you might’ve left, might have taken that warmth and devotion with you, was more terrifying than anything he’d faced in the field.
His voice softened, almost a whisper, as he spoke into the empty room, “Please, don’t go.” But the quiet, unyielding silence lingered, leaving him alone with the weight of his words, and he realized that maybe, just maybe, he’d pushed away the one thing he truly needed.
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