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A few days ago in Exuma #Bahamas 🇧🇸 #bartender
NOT #August 29, 2024
#rum #speaks like Captain Jack Sparrow
#Bahamas#bahamas 🇧🇸#late August 2024#August 2024#2024#bartender#rum#Johnny speaks like Captain Jack Sparrow#on summer vacation#vacation
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MDNI
141 as your drug dealer boyfriend
Ghost- Let's be real with ourselves, Ghost is not a good man. He doesn't care who he hurts, as long as he gets his. He will do anything to get what he wants and there is no stopping him. It's what made him a great soldier, and it's what makes him a great kingpin. He moves weight to put it lightly. There isn't a moment where an uncut key is unmoving; from a warehouse, to a plane (or car, or train), to a distributor, to a pusher, to up someone's nose. He'll try to do some damage control, make sure things aren't cut with fent, but that's only to make sure customers keep coming back. He likes to keep his hands clean, in the sense that he'll never be the one to pull the trigger on anyone that's out of line. Living up to his name, no one knows what he looks like. Hell, a lot of people don't even think he's real.
But when it comes to you, Simon's a different man. No talk about work, just you and him. Other than the multiple hidden guns around the house and Glock he sleeps with, life is normal with you. Holiday homes in the French countryside and Bahamas. Designer everything. Sports cars in all your favorite colors. You want for nothing. It's the life he wanted for you. After all those years of crying and hurt when he was away for weeks or months, you deserved the world. Want the new Hermès bag? You got it. Can't choose between the black or white louboutins? Get both. Stop eating you out because you can't feel your toes anymore? Sorry love, only thing he can't do for you.
Soap- Johnny is a small business owner. Weighs everything out by his own hand. Presses his own pills. Let's you help baggie everything up. A social butterfly, this man is at every concert, rave, or music festival. Sometimes he has a friend help push his stuff when he just wants to stay home with you, but for the most part he's his own salesman. And a damn good one. Never has overstock. No matter how much he brings with him, he'll always sellout.
Has a supernatural sense of being shorted. Can tell if a bag is even a few grams off just by holding it.
"Ye'r an idiot if ye think ye kin short me."
And when the other party denies, he always keeps a pocket scale on him, setting the parcel on it. And sure enough, he's always right.
He'll come home with a few grand, the only job you have is to sit there and look pretty. And roll his spliffs. Sitting in his lap, tucking the rolling paper into itself and licking it closed while he counts out a fat wad of cash. He hands you a fat stack,
"A've never bin good wi' money. Ye know how to spend it better than me."
He never touches the stuff he sells, no need to when all the dopamine he needs is right between your legs.
"Ten times better than any o tha' shite, anyways."
He pants in your ear while folding you in half, firm grip on your throat.
Gaz- When it comes to psychedelics, Kyle is your go-to man. He's a fucking genius, synthesizes his own DMT and LSD in a lab. It's a state of the art facility, clean with the latest and greatest equipment available. He supplies the whole Northeast. If it's a hallucinogen, it's most likely Gaz's product. And if it's good, it's definitely his. He has a cozy set up with some "organization" that he cooks for. Steers clear of actually selling to people, no need to when his clients line his pockets so well. Never brings work home, he even wears different clothes when he's in the lab.
He has a set schedule he has to adhere to but sometimes he's able to take vacations with you. And that's how you ended up bent over a balcony watching the sunset in Punta Cana,
"I work so hard to make you happy, now it's my turn yeah?"
A breeze sends a shiver up your spine while he kisses your shoulder,
"I know a private beach where you can even out those tan lines,"
Of course he doesn't give a shit about that, he just wants to fuck you silly on the seaside (and show off to anyone who might be watching.)
Price- Caring and nurturing, the man naturally has a green thumb. And alongside his prized heirloom tomatoes, he grows really, really good weed. Has a whole growroom in his basement, decked out with proper ventilation, ACs, UV lights, the works. The man grows medical grade weed that private clinics buy from him. He's legit. And of course he serves the public as well under the table, sells only to people he knows and established clients can refer others to him. He treats his plants like his babies, even going as far as to play music for them (according to him classical music helps them grow better???). You don't know where he finds the time, but he also made you rose garden for your anniversary. He brings up the idea of a family every so often. He'll finish as deep inside of you as possible,
"Let's replace that plant nursery for a real one, yeah love?"
Gonna write actual stories for each one if y'all like this ( . * 3 * . )/`
#sorry if its short!#still on vacation#cod x reader#short stuff#simon ghost riley#johnny soap mactavish#john price#kyle gaz garrick#simon ghost x reader#simon ghost x you#simon riley x you#simon riley x reader#john price x reader#johnny soap mctavish x reader#kyle gaz x reader#kyle gaz x you#soap x you#soap x reader#gaz x reader#gaz x you#john price x you#price x you#price x reader
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{overview} you and the boys decide where to go on leave. You sit in on a training session and Simon attempts to make further amends
{warnings} fem reader, a/b/o dynamics, poly 141, mentions of being horny, slight sexual innuendos
Chapter 18 <- Chapter 19 -> Chapter 20
“Beach?”
“Nah, not too fond of it.”
“Who doesn't like the beach, mate?”
“I’ll go for you peaches.”
“I don't want to go if you don't want to go,” you sighed.
“The beaches here aren't even nice, Bon. Could save a beach trip for the Bahamas or the Mediterranean or something. How about mountains?”
“That's boring.”
“Not asking you city boy.”
“It's almost summer. It'll probably be pretty,” you commented.
“See, our girl likes it. That's all that matters.”
“Lovie, I mean this in the nicest way possible. You don't know what's good for you when it comes to vacation.”
You rolled your eyes as Johnny and Kyle continued to bicker. You still weren't clear if they were putting this much thought into it because they wanted to make it special for you or because they wanted to make it special for them. Either way, you would be a recipient.
“I know!” an idea suddenly popped into your head. They stopped immediately turning their attention to you. John had pointed that out to you a few weeks ago. They had been arguing over some weird fact about koalas when you sniffled. They stopped immediately thinking they had upset you, not taking into account that you were still trying to adjust to the spring air. Ever since then, it's been your little superpower. “What if all of you pick a place, write it down on a piece of paper and we put it into a hat and shake it?” you beamed.
“Not bad, Bonnie.”
“Just can't use Caps hat, it'll ruin the paper.”
“Like yours is any better.”
“You been avoiding me?” you jumped. Simon grunted, skidding his back against the wall so he was sitting on the floor, next to you. He had too much leg for his own good.
“Not purposefully,” you assured, scooting back. “We just haven’t had much luck with our conversations lately.
“Meaning”……
“We’ve been fighting Simon,” you reminded.
“And whose fault is that?”
“Yours. For being moody.”
“I think you're the moody one.”
“You know”- you cut yourself off. “See,” you grumbled. He chuckled and you quickly caught that he had been pushing your buttons.
“I think you're still a bit upset over what I said that night- the night you overheard me and Johnny talking,” he suggested. “I wouldn't blame you if you were, pup. I still think about it too.”
You hadn’t thought about it like that. His words have been in the back of your mind since it happened. It made the other things he had done or said to you since then seem……fake.
“Do you think I'm useless? Really not worth the trouble all of you are putting in?” You thought about the most recent fight with Simon. He had gotten onto you about causing trouble, again. Maybe he was right. It wasn't like you had improved their life drastically. Sure, they reaped the benefits of your healing, but they could get that with any omega. One that was easy. One that didn't seem to be constantly fucking up.
“Easy, pup,” Simon brought you back down to earth. Even outside the smell of bitter lemons seeped through his mask. “Want the truth?”
You quickly shook your head.
“I want what won't make me cry,” you pleaded.
“You are a lot of work,” Simon admitted. You turned your head away from him. “But good things never come easy to me.”
You gasped your head whipping around.
“Oh, Simon,” you nearly whimpered. You leaned closer to him and wrapped your arms around him as best you could, your head resting against his thigh. “That's the most romantic thing”-
“Let's stop right there.”
You reached your hand into one of John’s beanies, gripping on to a tiny piece of paper and pulling it out.
Scotland
“Johnny, you can't just write Scotland,” you whined. “That's a whole country.”
The others rolled their eyes a little disappointed that their paper hadn't been picked- but the sparkle in Johnny's eyes quickly changed that.
“It's a surprise, Hen. Can't have you lookin’ it up before we get there,” he smiled. Every time he smiled at you like that you just wanted to kiss him. It wasn't fair. You pulled the rest of the papers out taking a peek at each of them.
Cornwall
York
London
You knew Gaz was London, but you couldn't figure out who was who for the other two.
“Where’s Cornwall?” you questioned.
“It's on the beach,” Simon explained. “Said you've never been and it's one of the nicer ones.”
“Well now I feel bad,” Johnny huffed. You giggled, wrapping your arms around his bicep.
“I can't wait to see Scotland,” you assured, making the glint reappear in his eyes. He bent down planting a quick kiss against your lips. “Thank you, Simon. I still want to go one day. And to London and to York,” you added quickly.
“No reason we can't get to all of them,” John smiled, running a hand down your back. “Time to get back to business,” John commanded. They all moved from the stools, grabbing some drinks, snacks and using the bathroom one last time. You smiled, pulling his beanie on your head. It was too stretched out but you didn't care. “Now that's a sight,” John grumbled, rolling the edges up so he could see your eyes. “We have one of the gyms to ourselves today. There's a yoga ball,” he hinted, causing your eyes to go wide.
“I can come?” you beamed.
“Course, only if you keep the hat on,” he whispered, pressing a kiss against your neck. You erupted in a purr before you could stop yourself, jumping at the noise. “Go put some comfy clothes on,” he chuckled at your reaction but found it challenging to pull himself away from you. Especially after you purred so pretty for him.
You had been occupying yourself on the high-tech bicycle when Johnny and Kyle sparring on the mat caught your attention. Now it was all you could focus on. John had called it sparring, but it looked like grinding to you.
You could take a guess as to why they got this room to themselves.
Johnny hissed suddenly, pulling his hand away.
“Bastard bit me,” he growled.
“You stuck your hand in my mouth, mate. That's not in any handbook anywhere,” Kyle smirked. You loved when Kyle was cocky. His normally melted eyes transformed into sharp ones, his lips pursed ever so slightly like he already knew he had won. Johnny sprang forward slamming the other beta onto the mat, the sound making you jump. It didn't seem to have the slightest effect on Kyle, who quickly gripped Johnny's shirt, and used his leg to switch the position so he was on top.
This continued for a few turns neither one of them able to get complete control over the other.
“Think they need someone to show them how it's done?” Simon asked, eyeing John up and down.
“What do you think, pretty girl?” John hummed. Your mouth went dry at the thought.
“That's a good idea…I think I could benefit from a demonstration too,” you faltered, making both of them chuckle.
“Can’t say no to that, ay?” John smiled, clapping his hands. Johnny and Kyle rolled away from each other, low growls still rumbling in their chest. “Cool it. Like feral dogs chasin’ their tails. I know both of you wanted to win to look good to our girl. So next time, win,” he said, patting both of them on the shoulder.
Kyle and Johnny hid their smiles bounding over to where you were. Johnny grabbed you off the bike, sitting down with you so you were between his legs.
“This’ll be good, babygirl,” Kyle chuckled, knowing something you definitely didn't. Johnny squeezed you with his legs, resting back on his hands. You weren't sure how much more you could handle, your mind still reeling from John’s “our girl” comment.
Holy shit.
Your hands gripped onto Johnny’s shorts, the only thing keeping you from floating off into the atmosphere. You had to move to sit on your knees, hoping to catch some distance so you wouldn't leave a wet spot on the floor. It felt cruel actually, making you watch something like this.
Four hundred plus pounds of raw muscle and experience going at it. Arms and legs tangled, the floor practically shaking as they threw each other to the ground. It was violent not in the way Johnny and Kyles had been. If you didn't know any better you would think they were trying to kill each other. Simon groaned as a particularly hard jab was thrown at him. You put a hand against your lips to keep from whimpering at the sound.
God, you were pathetic.
You didn't hide it very well, the sound spurring both of them on. They grunted and growled things in each other's ears, too quiet for you to hear.
“Smell that?” John taunted, his beard scratching against Simon’s mask.
“Don't get too excited, old man. She's all warm for me,” Simon growled. The smell of melted peaches and vanilla in the air was mouth-watering, it vibrated through their bodies as the prehistoric parts of their brains roll over. Their mate was in the room, one that needed providing and protecting. What better way to prove they could be that for you than to beat each other?
Besides it making you needy, it was impressive to watch. Simon’s moves were calculating, he put a lot of thought behind them. John’s moves seemed natural, like this was just a warm-up for him. It also didn't help that they seemed to know what the other was going to do before they did it.
“They’re showing off for you,” Johnny whispered, his nose tickling you behind your ear. The thought made you clench. You weren't sure who was winning, every time one pulled ahead the other one quickly caught up and beat them.
“Does it normally last this long?” You hummed, looking over at Kyle.
“Oh, lovie,” Kyle sighed. “These two can go all night.”
You didn't bother holding back a whimper that time.
John had Simon right where he wanted him. They had thrown each other off the mat, John sandwiching Simon between him and the wall, his arm bent backward in a headlock. Simon tried to get out of it but there was no place to move. The experienced alpha reminding him of his mastery. John knew Simon would never tap out, especially with you there, but all four men knew who won.
“Nice work, Cap!” Kyle and Johnny cheered, clapping. You quickly joined in, although you were too busy watching their chest heave up and down to really care who won.
“Rematch, later?” Simon questioned, patting his alpha on the back. There was only one person in the world he wouldn't mind losing to.
“How about next month,” John chuckled.
“Alright, let's get the pup peeled off the floor and get some food in her,” Simon chuckled, taking in your flushed appearance.
“I don't think she's here with us,” John whispered, looking at your spaced-out eyes.
“I am. Just trying to commit everything to memory,” you whispered, eyes still trained on their twitching muscles.
You yawned your eyes coming up to rub at your eye.
“My turn,” Kyle said, tossing a look at Johnny. The other beta huffed, sliding even further down the couch. Kyle put his arms under your tired frame, carrying you bridal style towards your bedroom.
“I can walk,” you murmured, cuddling your head into his neck.
“What's the fun in that?” He smiled. You thought he was going to your room but he went past it into John’s room. A happy rumble leaves you as the smell of campfire and tobacco hits you. John had been careful to preserve your nest, hoping it would encourage you to wander into his bed. He was lying in bed already, your eyes widening once you realized he was without a shirt. The wide expansion of his chest was covered in dark curly hair that trailed all the way down below the sheets. His body was bulky and strong in his chest and arms but narrowed down around his waist. He was covered in a layer of fat but one slightest movement had his muscles peeking through his skin. Your nails itched to dig into his strong shoulders. His arms flexed as he took you from Kyle, resting you against the part of him you were just drooling over.
You purred gently, pressing yourself against him. The hair was a bit coarser than you thought it would be, but you didn't mind. John matched your purr, his hands smoothing up and down your sides, carefully sliding under your shirt.
“So soft,” he murmured, against your head. His large hands took up your whole back, one resting on your upper the other resting on your lower. You couldn't help but shiver at the callous’ on his fingertips. His palms were a bit smoother- he must wear gloves- but not by much. That was a theme with all of them. Kyle moved one of the walls of your nest, hoping you wouldn't be too upset, and crawled right in next to John. You smiled, your hand already darting out to grip his shirt. One of John's hands left you, to worm its way under Kyle, tugging him even closer. Kyle rested his head on the alpha's shoulder, his hand taking a place on your back as well. Kyle had been fortunate enough to feel your softness many times, but it always made his chest rumble.
Your warming scent reminded John of something he had been meaning to ask you.
“Sweetheart,” he started. “Your heats comin’ up in a few weeks.” around two to be exact. He faltered when he felt you and Kyle stiffen. “Don’t need to discuss it, just wanted you to know I hadn't forgotten. It's all your choice,” he assured, causing you to relax. You said nothing but planted a kiss against his cheek, curling back up against him.
“You take anymore time, we'll leave you here,” Simon shouted from the couch.
“Could help her pack, mate,” Kyle shot him a look, heading towards your room to help.
“Am I always the asshole?” Simon grunted, kicking his feet on the coffee table.
“That's very good self-awareness, Simon,” John chuckled, moving so he was standing in your doorway. John whistled at you causing Simon's head to snap to your door. “You’ll be breakin’ necks, sweetheart,” the alpha chuckled.
Johnny heard from the kitchen weaseling his way into your room. He could hear the Scotsman swallow harshly.
“Deadly, Bonnie, deadly,” he tsked his eyes wracking over your form. You weren’t sure what the big deal was, it was just a skirt with a sweater. Maybe it was the tights you had on underneath? You rolled your eyes beginning to pick up your bag, and all three of them quickly swooped in to grab it. Kyle won, smirking as he flung the duffel over his shoulder.
“See you in the car,” Kyle brushed the two members of his pack off, heading out the door.
“Are you sure no one is going to come here while we’re away?” you asked hesitantly.
“I’m sure, pretty girl. Besides, things like that are for me and Simon to worry about, not you.”
“I would recommend bringing all your undies though, Bon. Wouldn't want anything happening to those,” Johnny said- a little too seriously.
“I think my boring white undies will be fine Johnny. Besides I feel like they’re more at risk if they come with us,” you chuckled.
Hello everyone! Hope you enjoyed this next installment! Chapter 20 (omg) will be posted tomorrow!!!! 🧡
#novemberheart#captain john price#gaz x reader#ghost x reader#kyle gaz garrick#poly141#price x reader#simon ghost riley#soap x reader#johnny soap mactavish#captain john price x reader#kyle gaz garrick x reader#johnny soap mactavish x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#price cod#priceghost#soapgaz#a/b/o dynamics#cod a/b/o#Gaz cod#ghost cod#soap cod#as needed
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Enjoy some of my neighbors!Johnny brain worms...
Frustrated neighbors!Johnny, who has to run an extra mile every morning because you're on vacation, and he has to relieve the tension in his loins any way he can.
He runs faster. Works out harder. Deadlifts to the point of passing out.
The image of you so beautifully splayed out beneath him embedded in his mind. Every rep barely repressing the constant need to have you again, finally giving in as he throws himself onto his bed and relieves the ache in his cock with the depraved necessity of his hand.
His own skin nothing compared to the velvety silkeness of your heat, bucking into his grip as the image of you riding him plays behind his clenched lids. The warmth of his release spilling out onto his abdomen in thick ropes, biting his lip to quell the growing ache as you blissfully relax a thousand miles away. Unaware of he pines for you, desperate to feel you again as you soak in the sun along the turquoise beaches of the Grand Bahamas.
#super soap sunday#soap squad™️#neighbors!johnny#johnny soap mactavish#soap mactavish#john soap mactavish#soap x you#soap x f!reader#cod soap
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You Don’t Send A Man To Do A Woman’s Job
Johnny “Soap” MacTavish x F! Reader
Summary: Heavily Inspired by the Fast Furious scene with Gal Gadot. While trying to figure out how to get intel on Makarov Y/N’s quick thinking & feminine ways help gain that intel much to surprise to Soap
Warnings: Sexual themes, seduction, mentions of female body parts
Being in the military definitely had it pitfalls sometimes it could mean sitting in a remote shack for days or even not having running water. But it definitely did have its perks. This was one of them. Drinking frozen Margaritas in the Bahamas Y/N, Soap, & Gaz all stood around a high top table staring at a group of Russians. They were given a tip that some of Makarov’s men were on vacation here. Soap & Gaz were bickering over what was the best way to gain intel off of them. Ghost & Captain Price were planted on the roof of the resort god forbid things went south.
“And how do you propose we do that? We can’t exactly just plant a device wherever we wanted to.” Soap replied with attitude. Gaz rolled his eyes & before he could even respond Price came over the radio.
“Oi knock it off you two!” He shouted. “Figure a plan out and let us know.” He sounded beyond frustrated & rightfully so. Y/N kept staring at them brainstorming ways she herself could be of assistance. Then she saw a very attractive blonde woman flirt with the armed guards outside of the cabana. It clearly drew attention to her & the the Russians invited her in. She plopped herself down onto one of their laps & accepted one of their drinks. A light bulb went off in her head.
“Guys.” She said trying to gain their attention. They started to bicker again & completely ignored her. “Soap? Gaz?” She tried again to no avail. “Fuck it, I’m going in Captain. Just make sure you’re recording their conversations.” She said into her hidden ear piece & whipped off her leopard coverup to reveal a cheeky red bikini. As she started to walk away both Soap & Gaz stopped talking.
“Steamin’ Jesus.” Soap said. Ghost & Price both chucked at the expense of his reaction. Everyone knew Soap had a thing for you it was so incredibly painfully obvious to everyone except you. He couldn’t help but admire the way your bikini bottoms hugged your ass or the fact your toned legs stretched on for miles. He licked his lips at the sight.
As she walked towards the cabana she gained some unwanted attention from men scattered all over the pool, but it didn’t phase her. She was on a mission & was determined. Once she made it to the cabana she started to flirt with the armed guards. With her breasts pushed up in her bikini top & her famous smile she had gained the attention of one of the Russians.
“It’s fine Ivan, let the beautiful American woman in.” One of the men said. “Come sit.” He beckoned her to come in & sit down. She sat on the arm of his chair & he immediately grabbed a handful of her ass. Then he said made a remark to his friend in Russian about how good your ass felt. To his knowledge you had absolutely no idea what he was talking about. But after being part of the US Army’s psychological warfare division Russian was one of five language you knew.
Back at the high top, Soap was ready to fight the man who grabbed you. Gaz almost had to physically restrain him.
“Think of the mission, Soap.” He reminded him. Soap grumbled to himself & started to mope into his drink. Over the next hour she had gained some of the most important intel about weapons, imports, exports, hell the whole operation. Soon the Russians started to get up to excuse themselves for dinner.
The man she had been sitting with, whom she come to know as Andrei invited her to dinner. She accepted even though she wouldn’t be attending. A small piece of her felt bad for lying. But she quickly reminded herself these men were war criminals. They profited off of the murder of children, women, & families. Once all of them were gone she walked back over to the high top where Soap & Gaz were.
Soap took the time to take in the sight of her walking towards them. Her breasts bouncing with each step, & the way her hips swayed. He was undressing her with his eyes & imagined her without that damn red bikini. Once she reached the table she put the cover up back on covering her body.
“So how much intel did you gain?” Gaz asked.
“More then we needed.” She replied.
“I have to ask, how on the Earth did you accomplish that?” Soap asked. She turned to him & smirked.
“It’s easy MacTavish, you don’t send a man to do a woman’s job.” She replied.
#cod imagines#call of duty#cod masterlist#john soap mactavish#soap mw2#ghost x soap#soap cod#soap x reader#soap mctavish#johnny mactavish#ghost call of duty#soap call of duty#soapghost#captain mactavish#john mactavish#john mactavish x you#soap mactavish smut
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Need someone to write a fic where johnny absolutely spoils kenshi, im talking fine dining, limo driving, spontaneous trip to the bahamas, buying designer clothes and just treating him to the lifestyle of someone obscenely rich cos you knowww johnny would spare no expense for him
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my first time requesting im sorry if it sounds really bad or cringe ehehsbbejrr
how do you think Simon would react to someone who has a seashell collection they are v e r y overprotective of and they give him one of the seashells because they trust him???
selling seashells by the seashore? nope!
synopsis: what the ask said! + a bit more because i started to really get into it
warnings: fluff, sfw, gn! reader, established relationship, marriage, a glimpse into simon's private life, soap being soap
a/n: i’m literally on an island rn and i’m pretty sure this seagull is screaming at me so i thought this would be very fitting 😝
Simon definitely has his pockets filled, only with Moroccan sand and shells and rocks and…possibly a starfish? It’s not much, but truly it’s honest work when it comes to him picking up and inspecting every shell or sea cookie there is out here on this damn beach. Soap hollers at him from a few yards away, hand beckoning for him to come over.
“Ain’t this one a big ol' Lad?” Johnny says with his hand on his hip and the other pointing down at a huge mollusk, it’s opal and rainbowed color shone in the blazing sun.
The taller one smiled behind his mask and grunted as his knees popped, reaching down to pick it up. With a knife, he poked and prodded into whatever was in it, which was now just a dead, sandy mess at his feet. “Pretty, then again, anything prettier than your face, Johnny.”
Soap glared at him, “Yeah, at least I have a face.”
Simon missed you terribly. Miles and miles away, he just thinks about how his lovely spouse is on their daily walk down the beach, trading and finding pretty shells to show him once he gets back. You two do this every time he comes home. After a few days of resting (with mostly Simon either shutting off in his own room or hiding his face in the crook of your neck in your shared room), you sit him down on the kitchen table and pull out your beach bag to debrief about the new shells. Each one with a different story attached to it and each one you wanted to share and love.
“I got this one from a fisherman that caught it in his net when he went fishing in the Bahamas!” You showed him a huge, pink and white conch shell that was larger than both your hands combined.
Simon smiled at you and took your prized possession from your hands and inspected the shiny finishing of it. “You weren’t at the Bahamas, Lovie, what did you do to get it?”
“Oh I traded a hermit crab shell for his nephew’s crab.” You said fondly, petting the shell that looked normal sized in his own hands.
Simon pockets the large nautilus shell into his bag somewhere and feels his breast pocket for the small, spiral shell that you’ve gifted him. It was his birthday, the day you saw his toothy grin for the first time.
You had found a beautiful, black, spiral shell the size of a blade. Taking it home, you filed the tip into it was sharp enough to cut through…something, you thought. You don’t know what he exactly would cut, but it’ll come in handy right?
He cried that day when you sheepishly offered him this small gift box, a silver bow resting on the top of it. After you calmed him down and held onto his arm, he opened it and a goofy smile replaced his tears.
“I sharpened it, it’s like a…like uhm a shank?” You said, rather confused actually.
Your husband snorts at your reasoning and picks up the lustrous black shell into his hands. He examines it closely, spinning and turning it in his fingers to make it shine in different angles. With the hard padding of his index finger he grazed the tip of the shell, and sure enough, it was sharp. Simon huffs a laugh to himself thinking about how he could potentially use this as his next melee weapon.
“Do you…like it?” You ask him hesitantly, sitting across from him on the couch. Your own hand fidgeted with each other as you pull and push on your knuckles, making them pop gently.
The large man in front of you looks up at you, eyes a bit wide in confusion. A small gasp is heard from the parting of his lips and he softens his gaze, looking at you fully. He didn’t laugh at you, he laughed at himself. “It’s silly…to be killed with a seashell, hmm?”
Large hands found yours as he abandoned the shell temporarily on the safe coffee table. He kisses your forehead. “Of course I love it, my sea star…best gift ever.”
Simon knew that it wasn’t just a gift from his spouse that day. No that’d be too simple, and his life is anything but. That was a piece of you, your love for him manifesting in such a small, delicate object. To break it, was to break a piece of you…and you would raise hell if he did.
His face settled on a slightly less disgruntled face under his mask as he looked off into the coast. With a pat on the breast pocket of his vest, he pondered to himself, ‘This time, it’ll be different.’ This time he has his own collection to present to you. This time he knows you’ll be even more excited than that time you found a perfectly round sand dollar when he shows you these little treasures. Maybe this time you’ll even scream when he shows you this dried starfish.
But one thing’s for sure, he’ll come home to you after all this. And one day, there’ll be no more war, no more bloodshed, just two old spouses sitting on the beach, the sun rising steadily, and a wall of shells from coasts all around the world.
#cod mw2#call of duty#call of duty modern warfare 2#cod mwii#cod#modern warfare 2#fanfic#cod ghost#fanfiction#ghost call of duty#simon ghost riley#ghost headcanons#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#simon riley#simon ghost x reader#simon ghost x you#ghost mw2#ghost cod#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley x you#simon ghost riley imagine#simon ghost riley fanfiction#call of duty modern warfare#ghost x reader#ghost x you#ghost x y/n#simon riley imagine#simon riley ghost#katzwrites
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Kenshi took this photo of Johnny while they're on their honeymoon in the Bahamas 😌🍹
Bonus info because I think it's fun to point out -
Johnny's wedding band has a garnet in it, because red is Kenshi's colour
He's developed freckles from being out in the sun!! You can see them along his arms and face
He's drinking a 'Sex on the Beach' cocktail. I had zero second thoughts about that decision
(Also I swear to god this looked SO much better on the tablet I drew it on, and now on my phone all the colours are desaturated. The fuck.)
#Johnny cage#johnshi#mortal kombat#mortal kombat 1#mk1#kenshi takahashi#mortal kombat fanart#art#my art#digital illustration#digital art
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Mark: Johnny have you seen-
Johnny: Mark it is 5pm, I have on my Hawaiian shirt, and a margarita is in my hand. I'm Johnny Bahamas right now. Address me accordingly.
Yuta: Any relation to Tony Pajamas?
Johnny: That's my cousin, I see him when I visit Jersey. He's in waste management and has a laundry mat if you catch my thrift.
Yuta: Like Winwin?
Johnny: Yep just like Winwin.
Mark: Why does Winwin own a laundry mat and work as a garbage man.
Johnny: The mob, Winwin is in the Mafia.
Yuta: But you didn't hear that from us. I'm already on thin ice.
Mark: Why?
Yuta: I just owe him money. At least I don't owe Chenle or Haechan money. They cut fingers off.
Mark: What goes on around here?
Johnny: You're too young to understand.
Mark: I'm 24.
Johnny: Go take a nap you're getting fussy.
Mark: you're right, I am. I'll go.
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A few days ago in Exuma #Bahamas 🇧🇸 NOT #August 29, 2024 #Johnny's tattoos #the Viper Room
#Johnny's tattoos#Bahamas#bahamas 🇧🇸#late August 2024#August 2024#2024#tattoos#summer vacation#vacation#on vacation
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ᨳິ petites idées! sfw & suggestive black chongyun. reader gender unspecified, slight physical teasing. also, bahamian slang was used which i hope was applied properly bcs i am not bahamian LMAO. please do correct any with accuracy if i'm wrong! ༄
• chongyun is from the CARIBBEAN. he is BAHAMIAN. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!! therefore i'm certain he knows variations of creole spoken in the bahamas, such as bahamian creole and haitian creole. however, his accent and his usage of the language grow in prominence when he code switches specifically. otherwise, his accent is subtle and only heightens when excited or uses an expression. nigga stepped back in surprise and went "mudda sick!"
• side note, chongyun also prefers oils like peppermint and eucalyptus because of their heat-defying properties. get too close and you’ll have a breath of fresh air from anywhere above his neck with the slightest whiff. i’d argue that this adds onto his natural scent and repels demonic energy from him, making his duties as an exorcist nothing but effortless.
• this is not only my theory but neso’s as well, that high temperatures of weather provoke unbridled frustration, while a high degree in spice provokes his code switch into a more slang-embedded and chatty persona, regardless of the emotion with this linguistic swap. high temperatures in the aspect of becoming overly flustered or anxious would result in stereotypical lightskin ass behavior. symptoms include smooth and failed rizz, leaning against a nearby wall, nodding upward in a 'sup' motion with a sweet smile, and other laughter-bellyache inducing antics.
• under the same subject, arousal can also cause certain emotions since.. other parts would become more heated than anticipated. this does not result in smooth behavior, but rather improper use of slang and a few mumbles of "goddamn" or "gyat" to himself. he is not smooth, he's adorable! uh-- well... unless it's hot outside while such occurs. then he'd come off more embarrassed with an attitude due to his ineptness to hold eye contact, in addition to how much he's stuttering and fidgeting in your presence. hm... this is still pretty cute tho, isn't it?
• y'know, there's so much black cuisine beyond soul food, but to start off with such chongyun's favorite sides would be potato salad, banana pudding, and deviled eggs because they're delectably served cold of course. as for other types of black cuisine, specifically bahamian or just caribbean, he likes conch salad, johnny cake with some vanilla icecream, crab rice served at room temperature, and despite his sensitivity to heat, chongyun can certainly exalt freshly made plantain fufu with various kinds of soups. also, if his environment is colder his emotions are less chirpy, allowing him to prefer being more composed and chill (pun intended), therefore warmer foods become considerably more tolerable for his yang energy to handle.
• you uh.. you guys know how he has those calming herbs in his popsicles for his yang energy? well.... what if he smoked those herbs to calm down? y'know how he doesn't come off aggressively and he's a chill sweetie? well.. imagine he's miffed and just reaches for one of his joints...
• okay, okay. let me close off by saying i looooove the pretty blue theme for chongyun's character, especially in his natural features, meaning his hair, eyebrows and eyelashes. his clothes matching is just a perfect plus. he'd have three strand twists done in his hair as his day-to-day style as well as his favorite style. the contrast of light blue to his gingerbread cheeks and tawny forehead is so eye-catching, radiating soft, approachable energy. assuming xinqiu is also black here, he definitely re-twists chongyun's hair for him sometimes; this is because doing it himself can make chongyun too hot, since wash days are a workout and a half. he'll have to constantly take a popsicle break til' he runs himself dry. if not xinqiu, however, y/n can lend a comb and a few hours, right?
꒰꒰ Fifteen minutes after washing and conditioning the lapis exorcist's head of hair, Y/n was confined to numbing their body by sitting in the same position as they moisturized his detangled spirals and corkscrew curls from the ends up. T'was doubtless that the young man was unfazed and emotionally pacified by the massage of cold-pressed cream and peppermint oil to his scalp and ends. Chongyun sighed in delight behind closed, mocha lips, ever appreciative to have someone so amply amiable to assist him with this monthly test of his sanity. "Dunno how I'd do this without you, Y/n. I admire your skill and precision, ‘cause Lapis knows I physically can't fuc-.. can't function..."
Y/n peered from behind him with a velvet grin, taking pride in being so adored for their charitableness. Even so, they were rather rushed and absentminded in their pursuit to deliver succor before Chongyun blew a fuse on his own, so they had no medicinal popsicles on hand to subdue his yang energy's lingering emotional outburst.
Thus, Y/n hummed patiently in response to his subtle agitation layered in clouds of gratitude. "Hmm? No, no, your skill and precision out-rival mine in many things, baby blue. You're an exceptional exorcist for one, aren't you?"
Y/n's words were warmhearted enough, in fact, to cause a drought upon any venom brooding beneath his furrowed expression. Continuing massaging his scalp with the eucalyptus now coating their fingertips earned them another exhale of relief from the miffed munchkin. Alas, this relief was faulty and short-lived, unlike the addictively euphonious voice beginning to toy with his muddled mind.
Y/n leaned further down so that their chest was pressed to the back of Chongyun's head, followed by tilting his head back enough to face them. They endowed a silken kiss to his now ever-more baked forehead, leaving one hand to caress the front of his neck and the other to hold onto his lower cheek and chin. With how his eyes could only widen in a failed quip, his plump lips parting and spreading into a naturally flustered smile, you'd think he must feel heavenly against Y/n's spread thighs. However, the opposite was evident, as his body's temperature began to rise and only increased with Y/n's giggles in response to his adorable reaction.
'Poor cute little thing.' Y/n mused, with their widened lips stuck in that gorgeous upturned setting. Their hand placement was all the more amusing (to them at least) as Chongyun breathed out an incoherent 'damn' under their touch, denying himself any further vulgarities as they continued kneading their fingers onto him and trailing their nails across his sensitive skin, goosebumps present and halfway-completed hair neglected.
"Don't start with your failed, flirty antics on me either, baby blue.. Just enjoy me like this, I'll fix your head momentarily." ꒱꒱
⑅ leman productions. all rights fucking reserved, do not plagiarize.
#hehe he said lapis knows#you get it?#i'll give you a hint#rex.....#(thank neso's creativity for that detail!)#genshin#genshin impact#genshin x reader#genshin imagines#genshin smut#genshin x you#genshin x gender neutral reader#genshin fluff#genshin x y/n#chongyun#chongyun x reader#chongyun x you#genshin chongyun#genshin spoilers#genshin liyue#chongyun fluff#black chongyun#genshin drabbles#chongyun head canons#genshin x black reader#black chongyun x reader#genshin nsft
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Songs I associate with certain Narutoland Narutos:
Landlord/MaleWife/Gutsy!Naruto - (Looks like a Tommy Bahama model but ??) The Lumineers “Sleep on the Floor”, Kodaline “All I want”, Jeremy Zucker “Cry with You”
Foreman/Alt!Naruto - (Looks like Tim Henson but listens to mostly Hardcore) Cage the Elephant “Ain’t No Rest For the Wicked”, Flobots “Handlebars”, a crowd of rebellion “Satellitear”, Coldrain “8AM”
Emo/Teen/RTN!Naruto - (Looks like Pete Wentz circa 2006 but wears a Hello Kitty shirt unironically) MCR “Teenagers”, Brand New “Okay I Believe You, But My Tommy Gun Don’t”, The Used “Bird & The Worm”
Postman/Himbo!Naruto - Smash Mouth “I’m a Believer”, Sixpence None The Richer “There She Goes”
Butcher/35yo!Naruto - She Wants Revenge “Tear You Apart”, Nine Inch Nails “Closer”, Johnny Cash “Ring of Fire”
#more Narutoland stuff#this was the doc I was looking for earlier lmao#the farmer and grocer aren't main Narutos because they don't have arcs#For some reason I still haven't come up with a Policeman Naruto#it's a small village so maybe they don't really need one?#how about a 35yo teacher Naruto? 👀👀👀#he has to deal with the bratty teen Narutos since most of the populace is around 19yos and they're all makin themselves useful lol#Hinata will have a stint as a school teacher too so 😈
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Fine I'll send another. Captain MacTavish ON THE BEACH. 🥵
I love the beach. I live on it during the summer. It's my second home, I swear. And the way the sea salt air and warm waters can cure the soul is something I just can't ignore with this man. I love this ask so much!!!
18+ MDNI Sexual Themes
You sat alone, comfortably in your beach chair with a cold beer in hand under a magenta colored sky as the sun set beyond the horizon of a turquoise painted surf.
The rhythmic sound of the waves synchronizing with the beat of your heart as the scent of sea salt and sunscreen etched itself into your skin.
The air was still warm, yet it carried a cool breeze off the waters edge as the slow curtain of dusk crept over the white sanded landscape.
It was perfect. A picturesque conclusion to a hot summer's day.
And off in the distance, with a Yeti tumblr of whisky in one hand and a cigar permanently clutched in his mouth, Captain MacTavish cast out his last line into the crashing surf and placed the warn grip seamlessly into its plastic holder dug into the sand.
The beach had done wonders for him since his retirement only a few years ago.
Soothed his war torn psyche with the constant ebb and flow of the tide. Molded his scars beneath a layer of sun kissed skin that further accentuated the seascape blue of his eyes and made every woman swoon with just a mere glance and a smile.
Yet it was here, under the blanket of encroaching night that you saw the man he had truly become.
A man at peace with himself. Letting the setting sun and roll of the tide absolve him of his past and breathe fresh life into his lungs at dawn's first light.
You couldn't pull your eyes off him anymore, and you were no longer ashamed about how your stare lingered on him.
The loss of sunlight elongating the shadows within the curves of his musculature. Accented by the seafoam swim trunks that hung perfectly on his hips. Creating a more defined sculpture of his frame as he effortlessly strutted along the sand to take his place beside you.
"How long you gonna fish for tonight, John?" You asked quietly, rim of the beer can caressing your bottom lip.
"As long as you'll let me, m'lass."
You smiled, watching him raise his tumbler in cheers to take a healthy swig while gently tapping the ash of his cigar into an empty can.
"Guess we'll be here all night, then."
"Aye. Looks that way."
As he relaxed back in his Tommy Bahama chair, your hand reached out to instinctually cusp the back of his head. Thumb and index finger pressing into the back off his skull, pulling a slight groan from his chest as your touch soothed his sun drenched soul.
"Careful, lass. Y'know what that skillful touch a'yers does to me."
"Mhmm. It's a good thing we brought the boat."
Soap rolled his eyes, glancing between your smirking expression and the vessel anchored just beyond the last sandbar.
"Which one ya love more, hm? The boat, or me?"
You raised a brow at his testing inquiry, firmly pressing into the back curve of his jaw with your fingertips as a hushed murmur fell from your lips.
"Don't ask questions you know the answer to, John. Won't get you anywhere."
Soap growled in response. Placing his hand on your thigh and giving your flesh a firm yet playful grip.
"May have ta shorten th'fishing trip then. Looks like I gotta assert my claim over you again."
"Claim over me, John?"
"Aye. Ain't no way I'm losing you to a gas guzzling bàta."
-
You both lasted no more than another twenty minutes before loading everything into the skiff and jetting back to his prized vessel. Where Soap MacTavish made good to his word and staked his claim over you once again.
Spreading you over every flat surface beneath the bow and docking his thickened cock repeatedly into the deep cove of your cunt.
Master of the Swell Masterlist
This is but a taste of the new WIP I have in store for you, Soap Squad. Johnny's got the 4Runner, the Captain's got a yacht. And goddman, do I have plans to rock that boat.
Tagging those who showed interest. Let me know if you liked to be tagged for further posts. Much love 💛
@deadbranch @ohgeesoap @astraluminaaa @a-small-writer-in-a-big-world @d3athtr4psworld @ghosts-goldendoodle @homicidal-slvt @shotmrmiller @glitterypirateduck @macravishedbymactavish @sofasoap @tacticalanxiety @random-thot-generator @writeforfandoms
#teaser for master of the swell#this asked warmed my sun kissed soul#love the beach so damn much#soap squad™️#glitterypirateduck#the brainrot of Captain MacTavish#captain soap mactavish#captain mactavish#captain soap x you#captain soap x fem reader#og soap x you#og soap x fem reader#soap smut#call of duty#cod
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Johnny Depp in Bahamas 💚💚💚💚
Credits to the owner 🎀
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2018 VoicePlay spring roundup — friends, families, fun, and fear
A busy winter for the VoicePlay boys rolled into a slightly more relaxed spring. Between various road trips and recording sessions, they made sure to spend some time with loved ones and savor their accomplisments.
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They started the season by celebrating another milestone on their YouTube page.
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3, 2, 1, Let's jam!
The boys kicked off their spring travels with a trip to northwest Arkansas for the VoiceJam A Cappella Festival. In between two days of workshops for high school, collegiate, and community groups, they headlined a concert on Friday night.
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In addition to reuniting with Deke Sharon once again, they also got to see their friend Chris Diaz from The Exchange, who was the director of the only high school group selected for the festival's competition that year.
While they were there, J.None was presented with a card containing messages collected from fans around the world to celebrate him officially joining the group.
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After the festival, the guys had a couple days at home to work on other projects. If you've ever wondered how Layne comes up with his various percussion noises and deft beats, sometimes they happen just to pass the time while he's commuting.
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Hey, lady!
For the second week of April, the guys met up with Rachel Potter to perform at a series of private events, including a corporate gig in Hartford, CT. Since VoicePlay already had six collaborations with Rachel in their catalogue, and several more with other ladies whose parts she could learn, they had the makings of quite a setlist for those shows.
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Five years after they released their "Trouble mashup" video and he's still got it down.
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Chickens and bergens and bugs, oh my!
During their next few days at home, they packed in some family-friendly fun. First, the Castelluccis hosted William's first birthday party, complete with a barnyard petting zoo.
A few days later, the boys met up at a local studio to film their next music video for a song about perseverance from the Trolls movie.
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Round and round
Then it was time for a swing through the mid-Atlantic states. They started in central Pennsylvania, dipped down to Washington, DC, then hustled back up to Long Island, NY.
Port Washington, NY show — photos by Winifred Boyd
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[This video was originally posted to the venue's Facebook page.]
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Later, dudes!
The last weekend of April marked Earl's final performance as Crush the turtle in the live Finding Nemo show at Disney World. To celebrate the occasion, Layne and Cyndi took Doris to see the show in the morning, then the four of them spent the afternoon at the Animal Kingdom.
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A couple days later, VoicePlay scooped up Max Herskovitz to fill in for Layne on a quick cruise to the Bahamas.
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Come play with us
While the others were away, Layne and Tony worked on a couple of upcoming PattyCake videos featuring superheroes, getting one ready to release and the next ready to film. Once their buddies were back on dry land, they lured J.None into their "Unexpected Musicals" series with the role of Black Panther and a tasty rap verse in their MCU video.
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The day after that, VoicePlay gathered up some family members and headed to a nearby farm to film the video for their cover of Johnny Cash's "Daddy Sang Bass".
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Side quests
The next week, J.None popped up to Tennessee for a couple days of concentrated vocal coaching (and a little sightseeing). It's important to keep honing and expanding your skills, particularly in creative fields.
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On the following weekend, family and friends gathered to celebrate Doris Stein's second birthday party. They had a fiesta theme, and a bounce house that was a big hit with the kid of honor.
Layne, Cyndi, and the girls had also created another family music video for the occasion, this time to "BFF" from the SpongeBob musical, which they'd seen on Broadway while they were in New York for the Total Vocal concert.
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A few days later, VoicePlay teamed up with one of J.None's other groups, Paradigm Party Band, and a few kids of their acquaintence to perform at a private event.
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Teamwork makes the dream work
The next week, the boys returned to the studio to film their next "Aca Top 10" countdown featuring the songs of Disney sidekicks.
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They finished off their video filming for the spring with a location shoot at an abandoned sawmill, where they created their own scene from an action movie, complete with a Panic! at the Disco medley as a soundtrack.
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Holidays 8.5
Holidays
Almond Day (French Republic)
Blogger Day
Bogotá's Carnival begins (Colombia)
Burnol Day (India)
Damn the Torpedoes, Full Speed Ahead Day
Fiesta de San Salvador (El Salvador)
Financial Investigation Authorities Foundation Anniversary Day (Belarus)
40 Day
Genes For Jeans Day (Australia)
Health Care for the Homeless Day
Homeland Thanksgiving Day (Croatia)
International Huemul Day
International Suspenders Day
International Traffic Light Day
Islamic Human Rights Day (Iran)
La Vella Festival (Andorra)
Lyrical Republic Day
Mann Gulch Fire Anniversary Day (Montana)
Maze Runner Day
National Aerial Tramway Day
National Be Naked Day (UK)
National Blackmail Day
National Children’s Day (Tuvalu)
National Dash Cam Day (UK)
National Failures Day
National Health Day (Brazil)
National Underwear Day
National Youth and Children’s Day (Kiribati)
Nuclear Test Ban Treaty Day
Nuestra Señora de África (Ceuta, Spain)
Return of the Queen (Johnny English)
Small Press Day (UK)
Tutti Frutti Hat Day
Umuganura (Harvest Thanksgiving; Rwanda)
Victory Day (Croatia)
Work Like a Dog Day
World Ant Day
World Tomistoma Day
World War One Anniversary Day (UK)
Food & Drink Celebrations
805 Day
Green Peppers Day
International Petite Syrah Day
National Couscous Day
National Oyster Day
National RoosTart Day
National Waffle Day
Independence & Related Days
Burkina Faso (from France, 1960)
Constitution Day (Iran)
Constitution Day Holiday (Cook Islands)
1st Monday in August
Assistance Dog Day [Monday of 1st Full Week]
August Bank Holiday (Australia, Ireland) [1st Monday]
August Monday (Caribbean, Montserrat) [1st Monday]
British Columbia Day (a.k.a. BC Day; Canada) [1st Monday]
Carnival Monday (Anguilla, Antigua & Barbuda, Bonaire, British Virgin Islands, Saba) [1st Monday]
Civic Holiday (Canada) [1st Monday]
Colorado Day [1st Monday]
Culturama (Saint Kitts and Nevis) [1st Monday]
Emancipation Monday (Bahamas, British Virgin Islands, Dominica, Grenada) [1st Monday]
Exchange Day [1st Monday]
Farmers’ Day (Zambia) [1st Monday]
Frídagur Verslunarmanna (a.k.a. Commerce Day; Iceland) [1st Monday]
Heritage Day (Alberta, Ontario) [1st Monday]
Kadooment Day (Barbados) [1st Monday]
Kool-Aid Days begin (Hastings, Nebraska) [3 days from 1st Friday]
Labor Day (Samoa) [1st Monday]
La Saoire i mi Lunasa (Ireland) [1st Monday]
National Hobo Convention begins (Britt, Iowa) [Starts Monday before 2nd Sunday]
Nut Monday [1st Monday]
Picnic Day (Australia) [1st Monday]
Shop and Office Workers' Holiday (Iceland) [1st Monday]
Simcoe Day (a.k.a. Civic Holiday; Canada) [1st Monday]
Summer Bank Holiday (Alderney, Guernsey, Scotland, UK) [1st Monday]
Terry Fox Day (Manitoba, Canada) [1st Monday]
World Commerce Day [1st Monday]
Weekly Holidays beginning August 5 (1st Full Week of August)
National Bargain Hunting Week (thru 8.9) [1st Monday thru Sunday]
National Psychic Week (thru 8.9) [1st Monday to Friday Week]
Stroke Week (Australia) [1st Full Week]
Festivals Beginning August 5, 2024
Butler Farm Show (Butler, Pennsylvania) [thru 8.10]
Here's The Beef Festival (Pulaski, Tennessee) [thru 8.10]
Summer Contrast Festival (Rogalinek, Poland) [thru 8.12]
Feast Days
Abel of Reims (Christian; Saint)
Addai (Christian; Saint)
Afra and Companions (Christian; Virgin Martyrs)
Albrecht Dürer, Matthias Grünewald, and Lucas Cranach the Elder (Episcopal Church (USA))
Barsi Bhagat Puran Singh (Sikhism)
Cassian of Autun (Christian; Saint)
Clipping the Church Day (Yorkshire, UK)
Cuckoo (Muppetism)
Dedication of the Basilica of St Mary Major (Catholic Church)
Dumuzi’s Day (Pagan)
Enola Gay Day (Church of the SubGenius; Saint)
Emygdius (Christian; Saint)
Feast of Our Lady of the Snows (Roman Catholic)
Feast of the Dedication of the Basilica of St. Mary Major (Christian)
Fiesta de San Salvador (El Salvador)
George Tooker (Artology)
Guy de Maupassant (Writerism)
Ilya Repin (Artology)
I. Rice Pereira (Artology)
Louis Wain (Artology)
Lucretia Borgia Day (Church of the SubGenius; Saint)
Mari (Christian; Saint)
Memmius (a.k.a. Menge; Christian; Saint)
Naum Gabo (Artology)
Nonna (Christian; Saint)
Ormisdas, Pope (Christian; Confessor) [Bamberg]
Oswald of Northumbria (Christian; Saint)
Our Lady of Africa Day (Ceuta)
Oyster Season begins (Starza Pagan Book of Days)
Pixie-of-the-Year Competition (Shamanism)
Putanesca Sauce Day (Pastafarian)
Sacrifice to Salus (Ancient Roman Goddess of Health)
Sixtus II, Pope (Christian; Saint) [Paris]
Tango (Muppetism)
Tasso (Positivist; Saint)
The 3 Keys to Unlocking Thoughts: Drunkenness, Love & Trustfulness (Celtic Book of Days)
Tom Thomson (Artology)
Lucky & Unlucky Days
Tomobiki (友引 Japan) [Good luck all day, except at noon.]
Uncyclopedia Bad to Be Born Today (because the yellow car was invented.)
Premieres
The Alcoholics, by Jim Thompson (Novel; 1953)
American Bandstand (TV Music Series; 1957)
Black Cauldron, by Lloyd Alexander [Chronicles of Prydain #2]
Bullet Train (Film; 2022)
Clear and Present Danger (Film; 1994)
The Conquest of Happiness, by Bertrand Russell (Self-Help Book; 1930)
Crimes of Passion, by Pat Benatar (Album; 1980)
The Dish Ran Away with the Spoon (WB MM Cartoon; 1933)
Eleanor Rugby, by The Beatles (UK Song; 1966)
Golden Yeggs (WB MM Cartoon; 1950)
Honey Harvester (Disney Cartoon; 1949)
The Killer Inside Me, by Jim Thompson (Novel; 1952)
A Lad in Bagdad (Woody Woodpecker Cartoon; 1968)
The Long Goodbye, by Raymond Chandler (Novel; 1953)
Luck (Animated Film; 2022)
The Magic Fish, by Freya Littledale (Children’s Book; 1967)
Never on Thirsty (Tijuana Toads Cartoon; 1970)
The Piper at the Gates of Dawn, by Pink Floyd (Album; 1967)
Prey (Film; 2022) [Predator #5]
Punch the Clock, by Elvis Costello (Album; 1983)
Revolver, by The Beatles (Album; 1966)
Rise of the Planet of the Apes (Film; 2011)
Risky Business (Film; 1983)
Rudy Valley Melodies (Betty Boop Cartoon; 1932)
Running Up That Hill, by Kate Bush (Song; 1985)
Savage Night, by Jim Thompson (Novel; 1953)
Shaun the Sheep Movie (Animated Film; 2015)
Shout, recorded by The Isley Brothers (Song; 1959)
Suicide Squad (Film; 2016)
To Catch a Thief (Film; 1955)
Whose Line Is It Anyway? (Improve TV Series; 1998)
Wise Quacks (WB LT Cartoon; 1939)
Yellow Submarine, by The Beatles (UK Song; 1966)
Today’s Name Days
Dominika, Oswald (Austria)
Marija, Nives, Osvald, Snježana (Croatia)
Kristián (Czech Republic)
Osvaldus (Denmark)
Salme, Salmi (Estonia)
Salme, Sanelma (Finland)
Abel (France)
Maria, Oswald (Germany)
Nona, Nonna (Greece)
Krisztina (Hungary)
Osvaldo, Vincenzo (Italy)
Arvils, Osvalda, Osvalds (Latvia)
Mintarė, Nona, Osvaldas, Rimtas (Lithuania)
Oskar, Osvald (Norway)
Cyriak, Emil, Karolin, Maria, Nonna, Oswald, Oswalda, Stanisława (Poland)
Hortenzia (Slovakia)
África, Nieves (Spain)
Alrik, Ulrik (Sweden)
Aphra, Areta, Aretha, Naomi, Neomi, Noami, Noemi (USA)
Today is Also…
Day of Year: Day 218 of 2024; 148 days remaining in the year
ISO: Day 1 of Week 32 of 2024
Celtic Tree Calendar: Coll (Hazel) [Day 3 of 28]
Chinese: Month 7 (Ren-Shen), Day 2 (Xin-Chou)
Chinese Year of the: Dragon 4722 (until January 29, 2025) [Wu-Chen]
Hebrew: 1 Av 5784
Islamic: 29 Muharram 1446
J Cal: 8 Purple; Oneday [8 of 30]
Julian: 23 July 2024
Moon: 1%: Waxing Crescent
Positivist: 21 Dante (8th Month) [Tasso]
Runic Half Month: Thorn (Defense) [Day 13 of 15]
Season: Summer (Day 47 of 94)
Week: 1st Full Week of August
Zodiac: Leo (Day 15 of 31)
Calendar Changes
Av (a.k.a. ʼĀḇ or Ab) [אָב] (Hebrew Calendar) [Month 5 of 12]
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