#Oops All trolls

[catty-wumpas]

Homestuck Secret Santa 2022 (Late edition) For : @monggay

My part of this year’s @homestuckss event.

Included is a surviving excerpt of The Execu-Cretary’s Diaries, a multipart action novel in the much maligned Ashen Facilitator-surrogate genre. It was being optioned for Alternian Cinema, shortly before the Dooms Day which destroyed the Empire (being widely considered a good move for the art of cinema). The series follows an ambitious 10 sweep old Jade blood (Harley Bequel), whose defied the norms of her caste to become a highly esteemed, and professional Execu-Cretary entangled in the corporate intrigue of Alternian Military Fashion: Sitting between the two most powerful women in Military Fashion, careening through Capital Prime’s streets in the luxury scuttlier at twilight, should have been more exciting. Just being there had answered a sweeps long quest to achieve high and move into the highest echelons of the Empire’s Execu-Cretary cadres.

But here it was less than 3 hours into my first duty-shift and I was bored. The worst possible thing for an on duty Execu-Cretary. 

There wasn’t even nerves. Nerves at least made you more likely to act in an emergency. Boredom made response slow, and meant more danger than ever. Nerves are something you get around someone who commands respect.

The Two Women I was assigned to, powerful magnates with untold influence, had started bickering even before getting into their scuttlier. The Argument had remained the same the entire ride into their office: ‘Were shoulder epaulettes  truly in this year’?  Aradia, who was the more reserved of the pair and surprisingly from the burgundy caste, and she felt strongly against them. Terezi, the teal blood, was much more interested in just having an the argument. 

Even a hard as nails, professional Execu-Cretary like me could see these two were in obvious Vacillations ... And the thought dawned, as an ashen lump in my throat.

‘This argument wasn’t for my benefit, was it?’ I asked myself, a cold sweat forming on my skin. Oh no, the last thing I needed was to be drawn in as the facilitator for a Imperial level power couple...

The blurb on the back of the novel promises a glimpse into the corridors of power, the lap of luxury and wealth, the intrigue of Military Fashion, corruption that spans the hemospectrum, and at least 3 Biotronic Ninjas fights. Owing to her wide array of combat skills, physical prowess, and a  ‘veritable armory’ of gadgets at her disposal Harley can handle any  threat that crosses her path... But she has no defense whatsoever against the two troll’s she  assigned to protect; a distant Burgundy blood with a mysterious past and a mischievous Teal gremlin and their Vacillations for one another. 

[caelanglang]

injury recovery…

*break an arm or two out there kids!*

[felsicveins]

The whole lack of gender preference thing is reminding me of homestuck quadrants and how fucked up would that be in the trolls universe. That said I can see Floyd ♠️ Otto.

Is this what kismemes do 😳😳

[kythecorg]

Their name is Snaps :3

[toshitophchan]

Roddacember 2023 Day 12 | Memorable Deception Moment

Deception is either making you go 0.0 or >:O, there is no inbetween

[warning-heckboop]

In an universe where these two coexist, I think they’d really get along great. Just a couple of bright colored, frizzy haired kids with freckles who look up to Clay and Viva, taking on the world.

Nugget belongs to the talented @heartfall-syndrome! Per usual, this piece is not canon to Nugget’s lore, just a fun little doodle of her with my own oc. I definitely recommend checking out @heartfall-syndrome’s Vengeance AU that Nugget is from to learn more about her, it’s a great au overall!

[zeussim]

You know I have rickroll links on my downloads page and I am literally so disappointed no one has noticed or come to complain. FOR A YEAR they've been there. I'll have to send myself an anonymous message and pretend to be a rickrolled person for just a glimpse of fulfillment so thank you very much.

[netherdevil]

unnormal vivilly dweller thoughts in my head

[skankhunt44]

Life dream post below...

I want to write a book "how to use Google for completely incompetent people"...

Maybe you could all fact check before the skank comes in and has to wreck school you.

Fact check so you don't spread your stupid. Also, learning can fix your stupid!

I will again provide mass information to the masses at tap of a finger.

[ectoplasmer]

actually no I think it’d be really funny if my hs s/i and my ygo s/i switched places

[astrxealis]

man i wanted ffxv comrades for the longest time. fun fact but like. it's been less ever since i got into ffxiv but i've always been super into games w character customization (bcs ocs or self-insert stuff lol) !! so all mmos i've gotten into (most on mobile bcs i never really was a pc gamer </3 or played online games on ps until xiv) are bcs of the character customization actually. even ffxiv (but also esp bcs i love final fantasy). man i hope i can get ffxiv comrades sometime ??

[lylethegenrecocktail]

I remember after I went grey, my color would always fluctuate depending on how intensely I was feeling a positive or negative emotion. If I was extremely happy, I got brighter, and if I was extremely sad or upset I'd get dimmer. I was pretty self conscious about it, but I remember Bruce helped me feel a lot better about it. Floyd did too, once we got him back. We kinda bonded over that with Branch. We went grey, Floyd went through all that awful stuff, and it made us all closer. But Bruce was the one who helped me not want to hide it anymore. I love that guy so much you guys you have no idea- I miss my brother so much

[hypewinter]

Hear me out! Danny finds his human form slowly getting more eldrich as he gets older (and more powerful) and ends up going to Gotham where people are way less likely to ask questions!

Sadly when the people of Gotham see Danny, oops my shadow has eyes now, Fenton they just assume he's gonna be a new Rouge!

Que the bat fam watching Danny waiting for him to make his move, over-analyzing everything he does. Mans can't even buy a new laptop without Bruce breathing down his neck about it

This would be an issue if Danny wasn't such a little troll, and he starts buying more obviously ominous things only to openly use them in improperly boring and normal ways. Like buys a death lazer and can be seen using it to make toast, buys a cursed box full of death themed artifacts and uses it as a coffee table, that kinda stuff.

Every time the bat's assume 'this is it!' And gets ready to take him down, only to see Danny setting up a new 'coat rack' made of kriptonite

Even better when they see him tinkering on some kind of doomsday device, the kind that looks super evil and dangerous and even has a red count down timer on the front and- it's a fucking air frier again! He already has three! Why does he keep making air friers?! Obviously this must be some kind of scheme

I raise you: Danny starts selling his things out to random citizens (they've all been intensely screened). The bats panic thinking this is an attempt to cripple Gotham in one fell swoop. Nope. Ms. Randall just really needed a new air purifier and Danny had a toxin dispenser that was just collecting dust.

I imagine though that he might start to notice that the bats are focusing on him a little too much which is a problem considering there are things going down in Gotham that actually need their attention. But at the same time, our resident ghost boy isn't ready to stop being a menace just yet. So what does he do? Kill too birds with one stone.

Whenever Danny catches wind of a new plot going down, he does something to draw the bats's attention to it. Two Face planning a robbery? Suddenly Danny is showing up to the bank everyday to work on the vault (he offered to reinforce it for free). The bats get so suspicious they focus hard on the bank and discover Two Face's plot before he can do anything.

The bats pat themselves on the back while Danny giggles in the background. Wonder how long it will take for them to figure out what's going on.

[suiana]

imagine rejecting a yandere! god and he gets all mad and petty so he curses your love life

so maybe you used to be a cleric or something that worshipped him and he decided to be silly and come down to earth in a more human form (still godly but less flamboyant). he was bored and what better thing to do than to meet up with his worshippers? especially you, his most devout and sweet little thing?

of course, he eventually fell for you and confessed his feelings. you're just so captivating after all.

"hey i really like you-"

"sorry, i am only meant for my lord and saviour☺️ we can still be friends."

"oh... that's not..."

yeah, he kinda forgot that you think he's joking about him being your god and stuff... oops...

whatever! you should've accepted him anyway! you'd break your vows for him wouldn't you?! apparently not.

yeah, so he decided to curse your love life becase he's petty like that and you wouldn't give him that time of day. wouldn't even entertain his delusions for a bit smh. how could you just leave a literal god heartbroken like that?

and just like that, your first life as a devout worshipper came to an end.

your next few lives were... rather tragic too.

all your lovers would randomly die, disappear, or leave just when things were getting good. it was infuriating and you were starting to think that the gods had something against you. well, more like a god had a thing for you but who cares right?

meanwhile, your petty and childish god was just watching over you from his abode. he really likes watching you. no, he's not a stalker. he's a god. there's a difference okayn gods can watch over humans like this! what? creepy? no he's not creepy! don't call him that!

he... also probably has a shrine and collection full of things from all your lives or something tbh. and no! it's mot creepy!

in any case, he didn't interfere in any of your lives directly up until your current life.

when you suddenly showed an interest in him again.

yes, after your first life you had also forgotten all about him. no, it wasn't a part of the curse he laid on you. it was probably just your soul getting revenge on him for cursing you. or... maybe it was because you were human. duh. unfortunately, your god has a peanut sized brain.

in your current life while reading on about mythology for your studies, you started gaining interest in him again.

"huh... god of... mischief? sounds like a real troublemaker."

you immediately moved on to another god after that.

and the god lets out an audible gasp.

how could you be so cruel? not even a, oh he was hot or something like that? just a simple he was a troublemaker???

also, he was not a troublemaker!

sure he might've meddled with your romantic partners and cursed your love life... and also caused some major disagreements in human history... but that's just a little bit of tomfoolery! a little bit of trolling if you will!

ugh! he's seriously getting mad again!

guess he'll have to come back to meet you in person to show you he means business this time.

[glow-in-the-dark-death]

We Help, Lost & Found

Danny after all the things back home settle down (finally), decides to open a little lost and found vintage shop.

(As part of his royal training as prince before his coronation to happen to officially be King, he needs to know how to manage the GZ and have good relations with em, and this is good practice)

The things he sell are given to him by the other ghost who wish for their belonging to be return to someone important to them when they were alive (family, descendant, friends, a past lover, a helpful stranger)

Danny's shop is somewhat connected to his haunt, and with his space core it can have a weird effect to the people passing near his shop, giving them the feeling of them having to go inside because there is something important in there waiting just for them.

-

The shop starts to gain a reputation.

People can understand to a level how the shop had their families old furniture or a specific jacket from your great-gramps, but entire albums worth of picture that you were sure were destroyed in a fire or have lost for many decades tends to raise some eyebrows.

People start to talk.

-

Duke just casually walked by the shop, his neck cracking by the force of how fast he turned to look at this little shop he was sure was not there yesterday: " Uh, guys was I dosed with something or is there somehow a black hole just inside that shop?!"

(Cue the Batfam being hella nosy and -oop Bruce casually going inside to investigate inside the shop)

Bruce: " Hello just checking out at the interesting stuff in he- is that my mother's pearl necklace!"

-

Danny's enjoying the whole thing, he gets to reunite sentimental things to people & and be an absolute troll.

Danny trying not to grin: "Why no sir! I had no idea how Important these things are I'm just selling them, oh I'm selling things that went missing and were part of a crime scene?! How terrible!"

-

Just an Idea

[spooky-pop]

Hello, I really love your broppy kid Ivy. Could you tell us more about her?

Yeah! Any specific questions I can answer? I can share just my current thoughts and ideas about her and what I'm working on.

Ivy was an "oops" baby, lol! What started as Branch having an off day turned into chaos when he noticed an egg in the middle of the night after he was unable to sleep. Poppy was the calm one but Branch was completely terrified at first, and Ivy ended up becoming his whole world. Ivy shows strong resemblance to Grandma Rosiepuff, which melts Branch and softens his heart. She starts as an only child but eventually gets a sibling.

(old old old quick sketch of his initial shock lol)

(Fun fact, I pulled a bunch of inspiration and influence for her design from Viva's concept art! Her hair and colors, I always love sharing this little fact tbh)

She definitely has Poppy's personality but amplified as a child, her energy is off the walls and she keeps her parents' hands full, at least until she hits her teens. She was a wild child, constantly getting into trouble but she was just being a kid. As a young adult her personality shifts, and she becomes calmer yet more sassy, haha. She is very family oriented, and loves to bond with her aunts and uncles.

(Example of Ivy shenanigans...Branch is not happy with her because she went and got herself all dirty before they had a royal family appearance to attend)

Most Trollings can start singing from a very little age, but Ivy did not sing for the first time until she was probably 14. Branch and Poppy never rushed her, but it was odd that their daughter was the only one who was shy about anything musical considering it was in her blood. She did sing, just by herself. She has a confident exterior but deep down she cares a lot about how she's perceived, since she is destined to become queen one day. She does overcome her shyness and becomes a great performer.

A lot of the story I have figured out focuses on her as a teen and young adult, and how she navigates life as princess. In her original ref I made, it has more info on her personality. And I hope to post another part to it soon!

Bonus: Sleepy parents with their new baby

Hope you like!