#RIP Tim I adore you I'm sorry

[thelionandtheeagle]

Do you guys wanna see something so immensely Tim Drake it kills the man? (In a good way. Affectionately. I love him so much)

There's so much that could be said here, it's great

[bunnyhugs77]

Honey I'm Home

୨୧- Just a little slice of life of a hard working dad, his tired wife and their twin girls.

୨୧ WC: 900

Jungkook pushes open the door to your small two-bedroom flat, his keys jingling in the door which attracted the two little girls on the other side to come running instantly.

The soft patter of their socked feet hitting the wooden floors as they rushed to his as fast as they could. "Daddy!" The girls squealed. Jungkook crouched down, his once drained expression replaced with one full of delight.

"Girls!" He exclaims, taking the both of them in each of his arms, listening to their adorable laughter as he engulfed them into his tight embrace. "Daddy! Can't breathe!" Aria squeaks from where her head rested against his chest. Always the dramatic one of the two.

Jungkook laughs, apologizing and letting them go. Aria runs back to the kitchen where he could only assume the source of that flavourful scent was coming from. Meanwhile Hye-Ji stayed back to show him the flowers she'd picked just for him.

"Are these for me?" Bending at the waist to collect the crushed dandelions that were once in the grip of her fist. She nods with the brightest smile he's ever seen.

Picking her up as well, letting her rest on his side with one hand, careful not to ruffle the very elaborate princess dress she was wearing as he finally begins to make his way to the kitchen. "Thank you so much princess, I'll make sure to add this to my collection." He places a kiss to the crown of her head.

There you were. His eyes seemed to soften once they landed on you. In a button up and your favourite pair of mom jeans." Hi baby," He gets the chance to peck your lips briefly before Hye-Ji was asking to be put down.

She quickly ran off to her sister in the living room where there were colouring pages ripped out, building blocks all over the place, a box of crayons in the laundry bin full of clothes that were waiting to be folded.

"Hi." You manage a smile before resuming your blank stare into the pot of tomato sauce for the spaghetti that you'd been stirring for god knows how long. "Is everything okay?" Disregarding your mundane 'yeah' he know something is up.

"Honey, what's wrong? Talk to me." You sigh, dropping your shoulders, finally looking at him. He was in his typical work-wear for his day job as a private banker meanwhile he works part-time nights as a mail courier.

"Today was a bad day." Letting your head fall into your husband's firm chest in defeat. His hands raised to hold you in his arms the same way the have been for the last 5 years.

The shiny silver band of his wedding ring catching the light for a moment as he gently rubbed your back. "You wanna talk about it?"

You pout softly, "There's nothing to say, look at the state of the house. Hye-Ji turned the house upside down looking for her dress this morning. Then I took them to the grocery store and Aria got lost." Jungkook's eyebrows raise, but you weren't done.

"I finally got them to sleep for an hour while I did some laundry, and then I ended up falling asleep myself, waking up to crayons and toys everywhere, and Hye-Ji was crying because she missed you and then I started crying because I missed you too and-"

You couldn't believe this was making you tear up. The day was hectic and the fact you'd have to do it all over again tomorrow. Jungkook hushes you in a comforting manner, practically swaddling you in his arms. "I'm sorry I couldn't be here," you sniffle, stepping back.

"It's not your fault. You work two jobs. it's just hard sometimes." You admit and Jungkook gets an idea. "Go." He says and your brow arches, "I'll finish dinner, and take care of the girls. Go rest, or read that Jasper Wilde book you've been wanting to read. Please. Let me help, you deserve it." He pecks your forehead and you weren't going to fight him on it.

Leaving the kitchen and the responsibilities to him. Telling yourself that it would only be a thirty minute nap but it turned into 2 hours. By the time you walked back into the kitchen, it looked like you'd walked into a whole new house.

Everything was neat and tidy, the girls were sitting on the ground with a bowl of abandoned grapes shared between them as they watched Moana with an entranced gaze.

The laundry basket was gone, the floors were clean and the air smelled of soft fresh linens and cinnamon. Looking back to the kitchen where Jungkook quietly tidied up, humming softly to himself. You stood hidden from where you were admiring your little family.

You may not have had much but you had everything you needed right here. "You're amazing you know that?" Jungkook says as you approached him. "I should be saying that to you." You counter.

"No. I mean it, Y/n. Having two jobs is easy, but doing what you do everyday is a job for a saint. I appreciate everything you do for us, I love you so much." His lips pressing against your forehead while your heart felt so full of love. "I love you." You say.

"I have to potty!" Aria declares and the both of you look at each other.

"Not it."

"Not it."

[lewis-winters]

4, 13, 19, and 22 for any ship involving a medic

WAAAHHH I only saw this now, I'm so sorry.

Let's do something different, with each question corresponding to a different ship! I know it says "OTP" asks but, unfortunately, the reality of being a multishipper is... well. This.

4. Doc Bryan/Nate Fick - Which one is more protective? Who needs to be ‘protected’?

Neither of them need protecting, they can definitely handle themselves on their own. We know that, they both know that. But Doc Bryan's default existence/way he interacts with people he cares very deeply for is just. Manhandling, chastising, and worrying. It's like enrichment for him, ya know? So Nate lets Tim fuss over him and lets him worry, because if he doesn't, Tim will just worry more somehow. And if Tim yells at officers for putting his Captain in trouble, well. So long as he tacks on a sir at the end of it, they'll be fine.

13. Baberoe - Who’s the bigger tease?

LMAO, Eugene. Babe tries to give it as good as he's got, but he's unfortunately too impatient and gives in to his own game easily. Eugene, however, knows what he wants and is also very patient and will make Babe wait. RIP Edward Heffron, you were a good man.

19. Pasiphaë/Halsin - How do they feel about PDA?

Ok. So. Yeah, I snuck some BG3 in here, Halsin counts as a medic! Anyway. Halsin's touchy-feely. Has always been, even before they properly got together. I have this headcanon that he has a thing for Pasiphaë’s hair—it’s the first thing he noticed about her, apart from her eyes. He obviously can’t stare at her eyes and not get caught, though, so instead he focuses all his pining energy into maybe-sometimes-accidentally-but-also-on-purpose catching the end of her long pony tail/braid hybrid in his fingers. When they get together, though, it's incessant. But it's always Halsin initiating. Pasiphaë’s a little more shy; she's a widow, it's been years since she was touched like this, but she gradually warms up to the idea.

22. Spina/Julian - What reminds each of their partner?

That stupid knit hat haunts Julian everywhere he goes. Sometimes, he'll leave Ralph for a little bit, then brush against someone wearing a knit green hat, and immediately get this urge to chase that person down, because it might be Ralph! But no, it's just some other guy wearing a knit hat. It would be pretty adorable if Julian didn't feel so embarrassed about it.

On the other hand, Ralph-- "Oh! You're from Alabama? My boyfriends from Alabama, too!"

Obligatory OTP Asks

[redhoodinternaldialectical]

5, 16, 20?

Linking the original ask post cause it took some digging to find it again lol

Something you see in fics a lot and love:

B-boysss... kissing :3

lol okay uh the overwhelming majority of what I read is jaytim that's rated Explicit, so there's, ya'know, a lot of patterns in there that I've self selected for, but attempting to get into a more meaningful answer, I really like the way that fanfic repeatedly digs up old shit and uses it as a catalyst for characters to gain greater intimacy with each other. The constant reinvention and re-contextualization of Jason and Tim's various fights is neat to me

A tiny detail in canon that you want more people to appreciate:

Oooh I'm gonna throw up the post I already made about the guy Jason manipulated into playing puppet for him

But that feels like cheating so I also want people to appreciate the asymmetrical aspects of the OG spoiler outfit, because I adore it so. I am a SUCKER for shoulder pads/spikes and 80s asymmetrical outfits.

Your very first fandom:

That's... actually pretty hard to answer.

The first online community I truly got involved with is City of Heroes. Loved playing the game when it was live, and I role played in the Homecoming servers for fourteen hours a day, seven days a week, for about five years. I still play every once in a while too! If you see Dread Captain Bones, David Drakal, or Cowboy Cline around, those are me :3 The only issue I have with saying it's this one is that I'm not entirely sure this counts as a fandom?? It really is more a role playing community than anything like a fandom for the game itself, most people only very lightly engage with the setting and it's considered a tad crass to get any of the named canonical characters involved with your character's story lines.

We could very technically count Naruto simply because that was the first one I ever tried to find fanfic for but uhhhhh... I started with ff.net with a super dark E rated fic because I thought E meant for Everyone and bounced off it so hard. I'm very sorry geisha AU naru-sasu fic I read when I was like thirteen, I tried so hard to like you, but my PTSD was not having it lmao

There's also half decent arguments to be made for Marvel comics, Doctor Who, or Vampire the Masquerade simply because my parents are/were such massive nerds lmao

Both of them did a lot of LARP and one of my favorite pictures of my mom is her as either the Sheriff or the Prince of our city ripping someone's heart out via a sponge soaked with fake blood :3 so yeah I def grew up learning about the clans and the lore and such

And this is very much a Marvel household lol My parents used to do story time with me about the X-men, and like they are completely accepting of my metal head and queer stuff, but I feel like it hurts my dad's soul just a little bit that I ended up being so into DC and so uninterested in Marvel. Whenever we talk about some of my (not romance related) plotlines for my DC fics he'll substitute in vaguely equivalent Marvel characters because he simply cannot be asked to dedicate braincells to DC characters lmao

Me: "I'm really looking forwards to writing out how the super geniuses and stuff push the limits of what Jason and Tim did to the diseases."

My Dad, knowing FULL WELL that I am not including any Marvel characters in this fic: "Oh yeah, Reed Richards would go nuts trying to figure that shit out."

My dad also collected Doctor Who episodes, like the ones from 1963 all the way to modernity, I grew up watching the black and white stuff, and for sure tumblr did expose me to Superwholock, through I never felt like I was a part of that.

It might actually be DC comics itself that's my first fandom! I just never really interacted with any sort of online or fandom space directly until Boostle dragged me into DC fandom's sphere of influence.

Anyhow I hope my ramblings were interesting/entertaining and thank you muchly for the ask! :3

[unmotivatedwrit3r]

How He Sleeps

Batboys headcanons

(A/N: It's been a lot longer than I thought since I've posted, but I have no sense of time and I'm in the middle of finals so I've been distracted recently, so I'm sorry for the delay. Hope you all enjoy!)

~

Dick Grayson:

He sleeps usually in sweatpants, often old and peppered with stains of questionable color and origin, different from the sweatpants he wears out when he doesn’t feel like looking presentable just to go grocery shopping

These are the sweatpants that never see the light of day; between you and Alfred, he’s never allowed to wear them in public

On colder days, he’ll wear a t-shirt or undershirt to bed, but if it’s warm he’ll probably go shirtless

He kinda just keeps his blankets on his bed year round, and kicks them off when he’s too warm then pulls them back when he’s too cold

As far as his bed goes, it’s haphazardly made in the morning and wrecked when he’s sleeping at night; he doesn’t care much for how his bed looks

He’s not so much a blanket hog

Instead, he steals the sheets

He’ll get them tangled around him, and you’ve accidentally ripped one set (they were cheap, okay?) trying to get your half back

As for how he actually sleeps, with you, he likes to cuddle, even when it’s warm

he just likes the feeling of having someone present and with him

Usually, he’ll be the big spoon, but when he’s injured or vulnerable, or just needing comfort, he’ll be the little spoon

Wrapped in your embrace, he gets the best sleep he can

By himself, he spreads out, but not to starfish levelBut if someone else comes into bed with him, once he recognizes them as not a threat, he’ll octopus around them

Jason Todd:

Sleeps usually in just boxers

If it’s cold he’ll throw on some sweats or pj pants, and if it’s freezing, maybe he’ll add a shirt

But he usually runs warm when he sleeps, so it’s not often an issue

Always sleeps with at least a sheet, and keeps his bed made for the most part, though it doesn’t always stay neat by the end of the night

He always sleeps facing the door, and with weapons accessible

He’s protective, even in his sleep, and sleeps best when you’re either lying on him in some way or when he’s wrapped around you

And he’s a pillow hog; he’ll leave the blankets, but you’ll wake up in the morning and find yourself without a pillow

It will either be behind him, by his legs, or in his arms

You think it’s adorable, but you could do without the neck pain from sleeping without pillows

So you’ll use him as a pillow instead

By himself, he sleeps on his side or on his back, pillows both under his head and behind him, and he doesn’t move around too much unless he has a nightmare

Tim Drake:

When he actually gets ready to go to bed, he wears t-shirts and boxers most often

Tim keeps a lot of covers on his bed —he gets cold easily— and he’d rather have the layers than the long pants on

He does, though, have a collection of assorted t-shirts his friends have given him and wears those to bed and around the house; at some point you started counting how often he wears what shirts and it’s become a bit of a running tally you share with his friends. Tim has no idea

When you’re sleeping in the same bed, assuming you convinced him to actually sleep and not just pretend to sleep only to go back to work, the two of you sleep intertwined in some way, whether it be hands, legs, or one of you sleeping on top of the other

When he’s alone, he curls up small and into the fetal position

It scared you once, when you thought he was in bed and didn’t really see him because he was curled up amongst his pillows

He was there, and you accidentally woke him up as you patted down the bed

In general, he takes all the comforters on the bed and bunches them around himself

When you’re with him, you’ll usually be able to keep hold of a little bit, but sometimes it’s too hot out for that many covers, and you have to back away from him and his comfort mound

Damian Wayne:

Sleeps in undershirts and pj pants, usually solid colored dark tees and various dark patterned pants, often striped or plaid

He never wants to be caught off guard and in a position where he’d be indecent

Also he just would rather sleep fully clothed

Sleeps better under the weight of the covers, so the winter months are more enjoyable for his level of comfort

You eventually get him a weighted blanket, and he adores it

When you’re sleeping next to him, he sleeps best, though only he truly understands how much better he feels when you spend the night sleeping beside him

The two of you don’t always touch, especially since you tend to stay in one spot for the most part, but it’s common to fall asleep with your head using his arm or shoulder as a pillow, or with your legs tangled together but heads on separate pillows

With the weighted blanket, sometimes there will be one of you who has more because it’s not very stretchy, but otherwise, there aren’t too many problems

[lifewithdavefarts]

Halloween episode?

The DaveShorts is a series of (tentatively) shorter stories based on readers’ requests. Despite the name and the story below, they don’t have to be related to the main Dave series, so if you have any idea, feel free to share!

DaveShorts #1 - DaveFarts: CamoFarts

Before leaving for the party, Dave as usual decided to torture me with his farts. He made me trip over the couch, grabbed my head and planted it in his ass, only to start farting loud and proud. Dave’s choice for this Halloween was a pair of camo pants, simply because he thought they looked good and unusual enough (for him) to pass for a costume, even though the party didn’t require one. 

“Grenade!” he shouted, imitating a random COD soldier more than anything, given the kind of pants he was wearing, only to raise his leg a bit and rip another loud fart, because he’s that mature.

“Thanks I guess.” I said, as I went looking for my jacket, my nostrils burning. 

“Told you I had to test those pants first.” he joked.

"They look like shit, now let's go." I firmly said, annoyed.

We were late and yes, as much as I enjoyed my straight bud being chill and all about my kink, we had to leave. The friend who was throwing this party already messaged me to know what the fuck were we doing. Luckily, it was only a few blocks from us, so it was a 10 minutes walk.

It was late at night and were already alone in this boring town. Dave kept farting a couple of more times, because of course he did.

“Trick or treat, Tim?” “Which one is the fart?” I asked, still annoyed.

He ripped two loud farts back-to-back and passed it as an answer.

“Both, actually.”

Once we got the party, we were greeted by the scent of alcohol, the smell of some weird scented candles, and some buds, but overall it wasn’t a night for party animals (the perks of being adults, finally), it wasn't even "spooky" you know, though the music was nice.

“Wellllcome friends.”

Oh, it’s Greg, dressed up as usual even though it wasn’t necessary. Now don’t get me wrong, we all love a great Halloween costume, but please we’re just trying to hang out, stop interrupting our-

“You might be wondering why me, Greg, should be dressed up as magician...” he asked, but that was a rhetorical question and we didn’t care.

“’cause you’re gonna disappear?” Dave joked, earning some laughs.

“Very funny, Dave. But you see, I actually do know some tricks.”

We all rolled our eyes as Greg pulled his phone out of his pocket, and opened a weird App that all it did was having the screen flash in a bunch of different colors. He then pointed the screen right in Dave’s face, almost blinding him.

“I’ve been trained in the ancient art of hypnosis.”

We all laughed.

“And I’m telling you, Dave. You like attention? Well, you’re gonna be a... I don’t know... what’s popular nowdays...”

“Not you I guess.” he again joked.

“Fuck you. You’re gonna be a fucking e-cam girl or some shit like that. And you're gonna be one as long as your clients are satisfied!”

“What?” me, Dave, and our other buds said.

“Those are popular nowdays... right? E-cam girls? Please validate me I don't know what I'm doing why my life!”

Dave reached for Greg’s phone and put it back in the so-called magician’s pocket, then pinched his cheek as he was a cute dog. “You’re adorable, dude.”

We then all walked away to get some drinks. That was weird and embarrassing, even for Greg’s standards.

–––

Later that night we went back to our place, a bit tipsy because of the alcohol but actually not tired, so me and Dave decided to fire up some shitty horror movie to make fun of. I was sitting on the couch, trying to decide which one to pick on Netpicks, only to have Dave walk in front of me, turn around and bending over, his camo pants getting tighter and fully cladding around his ass.

“May I suggest a third choice...?” he said in a super weird, sexy (?) voice.

What the fuck. And obviously, a loud fart immediately ensued, right in my face, from that weirdly rounder ass. 

“Oh... sorry... was that me?” he said, again in that weird voice, right before ripping what was basically the other half of this loud fart.

I got up, my dick almost drilling a hole through my denim crotch. I was stupidly aroused, I'll never get used to Dave's farts and this is weird even for our standards.

"Where are you going, you hot stuff?"

What the fuck.

"I thought you liked me being dirty."

"I literally never said that. Like... never!"

Another deafening fart echoed in the room, Dave's camo pants wishing they were probably being used in an actual war rather than enduring my bud's loud blasts.

"Come here, babe. Sit on the couch... I'm gonna make this night unforgettable."

He stepped closer and then pushed me on the couch, as if he meant it. What the fuck. Did Greg actually do it? Was Dave... hypnotized? My bud was towering over me, my face aligned with his crotch.

The only conflict those camo pants were witnessing was me hating this and at the same being wildy aroused by it. I hate myself!

"Tell me something dirty..." he said, staring down at me.

"...mud?"

He leaped on the couch, while still standing up. He was basically teabagging me now. I guess, given the pants he's wearing, that he's again doing a COD impression.

"Oh yesss you dirty pig."

And I heard a loud blast above me, as his crotch rubbed through my hair. Fuck you Greg, what the fuck did you do to our bud?! How is this even possible?!

As the fart kept going, Dave was basically using my head as a stool. I gradually succumbed to my bro's weight and I had to lay down, and he made sure that my face remained aligned with his farting ass because apparently I had lost my oxygen rights.

Dave was now lying on me on his back, as if we were pulling off a gross, gassy version of the 69, his roaring ass still blasting my face.

"Ohhh I'm so fucking horny dude." he said.

"No you're not!" I yelled, as if he told me had a gun.

But he answered with another fart.

"Look how good those pants look on me, you pig."

Yet another loud blast, short but proud.

"I can feel you... appreciating me."

Given how we were positioned, Dave could feel my boner growing even more, which made me want to die accordingly. The stench was unbearable instead, and indeed I was probably going to die for real.

"Fuck you Greg!" I yelled.

And another fart ensued. I had to stop this. I had to save Dave but also myself. Then I remembered Greg's words: "as long as your clients are satisfied". Was this a clue to how to break the spell or whatever shit this is supposed to be? Maybe there's a safe word?!

Dave was going to fart again, I could tell because he was showing off his camo ass inches from my face... and as much I appreciated Dave blasting me, I didn't want to it be like this, with him not being himself.

I had an idea, and it was worth a shot.

"I unsubscribe!" I screamed. "I unsubscribe!"

Apparently, this was the magic word indeed. No fart came out, and it all went silent.

"Fuck, I can't do this anymore." I heard Dave, almost crying with laughter.

He raised his ass, basically letting me go and he sat normally on the couch next to me. I could taste oxygen again, or what was left of it in that room. I've never seen him laughing this much, not in recent times at least. Like, he was literally crying now.

"What the fuck."

"Bro did you really think that Greg hypnotized me?" he tried to say, but he couldn't breath for how much he was laughing. "I unsubscribe! I unsubscribe!" that was a really bad impression of me.

"Fuck you, you asshole." I hissed "That was horrible..."

"Was it?" he asked, with a smirk. "You pig..." he again tried to do that sexy voice but laughed again instead.

"Fuck you..."

"I appreciate that you still wanted the old me back though. I'm so moved I could facefart you again." Dave then said, faking some tears, but not the fact that he could facefart me again.

"I'm just going to bed now..."

"That's what you get for saying that my camo pants look like shit! You get to know them up close and personal haha!"

All of this was just a disgustingly petty revenge for something that I said hours ago. Fuck you, Dave, you're both the best and the worst friend/roommate I could ever ask for.

As I walked upstairs, actually heading for the bathroom to get rid of my boner, I felt another fart echoing back in the living room. "Don't forget to like and subscribe!".

"I'm hitting the dislike button!" I yelled back at him.

"I love you too!"

Yeah, despite everything, truth to be told I'd totally subscribe to Dave, as long as it's the real one.

The End

[batarangsoundsdumb]

guess fucking what? my inbox is so fucking full right now i'm unloading all of this shit in one post.

For the 11th gotham memes: gothamites react to bruce being jacked in a tiktok he made with kids, like super yoked, ripped as hell

fucking hilarious thanks. i think i did it in one meme post, but i genuinely don't remember which one

i dunno which of the batfam would do this but one time i was sleeping over at a friends house and ended up on the floor bc the bed was so very small and i just stayed there because the rug was soft

that's a drunk jason move i don't know what to tell you

tim and jason are "i listen to pop punk" solidarity. whenever jason highjacks the batmobile theyll go on long ass car rides blaring mcr and paramore and then never talk about it again

as they should!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tim: no jason it's my turn using the aux cord i gotta put on my jams jason: don't you dare put on weird shit tim: don't worry, you're gonna love this *plays fearless (taylor's version)

hear me out hear me out, red hood stans 🤝 nightwing stans t h i g h s

holy shit yes.

SNL au: Bruce breaks character when pretending to superman and says something like "I'm not superman! You've seen his gps!! It's from 2001!!!" @sabeanybabe

superman flies past the snl building the next day just to say 'actually it's from 2005, i'm not a heathen'

does your back hurt from carrying the batfam fandom

it hurts more from the exotic rock collection i keep in my backpack, but thanks for the concern.

I love your posts by why would you always leave the best parts in the tags?

as a treat for the people that check the tags ;) (and also because i'm committed to the short post aesthetic)

somehow your playlist was everything i never knew i needed. i mean it. this is my new favorite playlist.

and don't you dare get a new favourite playlist!

babe ur stoner tim playlist is exactly too perfect, earth is literally blessed by ur existence

babe thanks so much! i love my stoner tim playlist because it's just my usual playlist but people think it's an artistic choice that i put taylor swift and britney spears in there, when it's just what i unironically like listening to

JANDKSKDK BILLY RAY CYRUS ON THE STONER TIM PLAYLIST I LOVE IT IT

again it's not even an ironic choice, i know every single word and i genuinely like the song

The last chapter of Fundamentals of Casework has me crying at work. Thanks I love it @dudelookitsalesbian

oh babe, i'm sorry, but also, not sorry i love chapter 4 so much it's my lovechild with the 'mental illness' tag

soooo....stumbled on your tumblr by some stroke of fate??? read your DC fanfic first. which is PHENOMENAL btw. then found all the batmemes; the funniest thing EVER bc everyone forgets about regular old gothamites. kept scrolling and your blog pops up as recommended. clicked on the ao3 for shits and giggles and waddaya know?!?!? it's YOU!!! you're LEGEND!!!! ever seen that meme? it's a video of a cat that got into a baseball field and the two announcers get really invested in his escape attempt and start giving a play by play of the cat instead of the game. memeable moment: "GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!"

i seriously think about this ask every single day and it's so fucking funny to me that i've never seen the meme you're referencing, but i still find myself going 'GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!' whenever i see something funny. but wow i'm glad you liked this steaming pile of garbage

Fav dc character overall? And fav batfamily character?

don't ask me to pick between the loves of my life, but i can tell you i've cried about every single batfamily member and also wally west (my beloved)

What's your opinion on fans having a problem with batfam being "too big"? And some even claim that batfam is just "Bruce Alfred Dick Damian" and the rest of them are just "friends and allies" (source: reddit) Personally, I like batfam because of this reason but idk

stupid. a family can never be too big. i'm not that big a fan of like huge batfam stuff with everybody from every single universe, because as much as it's funny for bruce to have like 30 kids, it just feels a little too OOC for me.

This is the best tag I've seen involving the batfam, thanks for thinking of it

This is canon now @nctxrejects

lmao yeah i think at that point alfred has had to sit through like at least a dozen coming out talks and just has a pride flag collection in the attic that he pulls out whenever a kid comes out

idk why batfam hits different as compared to any other superhero family

bc it's found family and usually the other superhero families are almost all genetically related in one way or another

I don't know if you watch the umbrella academy but I saw your last post about batcest and saw the similarities. But the thing is (although I think it's weird) in TUA, they addressed it by saying "they were raised as weapons, not siblings" or something along those lines, which is simply not the case with batfam.

yeah i watched tua but i also thought it was ridiculous and they still treated each other as siblings so i didn't like the luthor/allison thing, and am glad they stopped doing that shit bc it fucking sucked.

Hot take: Batcest shippers are the same people who believe adopted siblings are not actual siblings

smoking hot take: batcest shippers are the people who watch 'my sister got stuck in the washing machine' porn

Duke was adopted by Bruce?

not technically no, but do i, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb, look like i care?

True story but I had to change my freaking name because it used to be "Damien" and most people would go "OH LIKE DAMIAN WAYNE" like please I'm just tryna live

true story, but i don't actually think of damian when i hear the name damian, literally the first thing that pops up is damian darkh like bruh what?

apparently dc comics company supported comic stores by giving out new titles and stuff during the beginning of the pandemic to help them run and I just think that's wholesome

ah yeah that's so fucking cool, still don't like dc, the company, because this world is a capitalist hellhole and we're all owned by warner brothers or disney with no in between.

ayo looking at tumblr head canons and finding out bruce is actually a terrible father is a punch in the gut

lmao yes, in like 50% of comics bruce is a terrible father and it gives me whiplash

oooh I just saw the jason todd vs winter soldier post and the real question is: batman vs iron man

while iron man has like hundreds of cases of armor, batman could throw out an emp and have the guy dropping out of the sky in 2 seconds.

dickfast = fastdick = quickdick = quickie

magnum hot take

hey bata(?) just thought I'd let you know I have copied the obnoxious emoji and Billy Ray post for use on simping men going forth

thank you 😘🌷 (@spacebarsidecar)

why would you do that to your followers???? i get why i did it, but why would you???

what is scarecrow made the nightwing funko pop himself, like those diy-ers that paint over other ones

oh god no, horrible take, horrible take, that's a disgusting thought oh no

I see your HC that Bruce and Oliver fucked and raise you this: Dick and Roy ALSO fucked

yes they did and it was a horrible moment for jason to find out dick has fucked both of his best friends

"at this rate bruce adds like 1 child to his family every decade or so" Duke is introduced in 2013, Damian as Damian, not as an unnamed child, in 2006. And he is already 14 years old, Robins rarely remain Robins after 16 😬 It looks like a new Robin and Batkid will appear in a couple of years

i mean i can't wait? but somebody will probably die first tho, we're due for another major character death. my money's on either cass or duke this time.

BRO you're so right all of your Bruce's ex headcanons are amazing but they aren't ships, that's kinda wild. Like I don't want any peeks into how their relationship was I just want to see everyone make fun of them

lmao YES it's just i love bruce being a slut, like good for him.

I am in love with your posts your honour thank you

omg thanks are we like,, gonna kiss now?

The justice league needs to have a meeting to discuss how many of their members/partners have slept with bruce. Because through a combination of cannon & fannon (if DC wasn’t homophobic) we have AT LEAST: 1) clark 2) lois 3) oliver 4) dinah 5) john

Thats not counting villains or random civilians @dudelookitsalesbian

yes yes yes, they'll have a yearly meeting about how many of their collective exes could be out for revenge and batman's list just keeps getting longer.

tim was like "i'm drake now" and everyone was like ahh so your fursona is a dragon and tim was like pffffft no. ducks.

and what about it?

when steph's fighting livewire and she zaps her with lighting and nothing happens and then they both just. stand there awkwardly for a second and talk. yeah i couldn't stop laughing at that batgirl steph is the BEST

oh yeah that was fucking hilarious and i think it would be so cool and sexy of dc to give steph a little comic series,,, as a treat

Hi I absolutely adore all of yours "Bruce and Oliver very badly pretending they didn't fuck each other" memes

lmao i do too

I need you to know that “Bruce Wayne had frosted tips” is one of my favorite Bruce takes of all time it’s so galaxy brained. you’re right and you should say it

he also painted his hair blonde once when he was travelling and in conclusion, this is why he's being blackmailed by the gotham gazette.

you know my thing about gordon being branded as the only good cop in gotham is its a load of shit like arguably he's a good person and not working to screw people over or anything but the fact that he also works w. batman makes him a shit cop. like yea batman is better than the mob but its still illegal its still an abuse of power he just not making bank

babe, all cops are bad cops. (but yeah youre absolutely right, working with vigilantes makes you a shit cop, but also working against vigilantes just makes you an asshole cop yanno?)

ruh roh i think i’m about to add “so not yeehaw” every time i don’t like something

that's a very good vocabulary upgrade

somehow i feel like steph already knew. like babs obviously knew but i feel like bruce got high/drunk in front of steph and started telling his boarding school stories and steph was just like “oh you fucked up i’m never gonna forget this”

steph and bruce have weird uncle/rebellious niece dynamic and they just hang out sometimes and bruce will be like 'i once broke my arm when i tripped over a hedge when i was drunk so oliver drove me to the hospital on an electric scooter' and steph will just have to sit there with that knowledge in her head.

Hello I just wanted to tell you you are So right in all your steph opinions bc she is, in fact amazing and I think that's very sexy of you. Ps. Your Bruce/Oliver fic is hilarious

babe, thank you so much and yes steph is amazing and i love her and she deserves the world and she's the best member of the batfam hands down. also thanks

In Supersons we see a couple of kids that are implied to be Damian and Jon's children and the boy has laser eyes and can fly, so I asume he's not adopted. The girl, who calls Bruce grandpa, can also fly, btw. So it's canon (probably by accident) that Jon can have kids and he must have married one of Bruce's kids. (I'm hoping for Damian, mostly because any other of his children would be waaaaaaaaaaaaay too old.) @artemisa97

lmao that was probably an accident seeing as jon is a 17 year old superhero in the year 3000 (by the jonas brothers)

You know, I'm a die hard fan of your memes, but I gotta say one thing: if Gothamites actually took gas mask everywhere with them, then the Scarecrow would just be a weird dude in a weird costume, and not a villain oh so scary. DC really should just takes notes from you.

bold of you to assume there's no gothamite anti-maskers

How does it feel being the funniest person on this app?

horrible, next question.

I can't listen to Green Day or Billy Joel without thinking of your post about how Bruce got arrested at a Billy Joel concert @nightwings-kid

yeah that's your mistake, i on the other hand can't enjoy billy joel without thinking about the glee rendition of 'uptown girl'

I've FINALLY been watching the Batman animated series and I gotta say, after watching "the gray ghost" I am CONVINCED that Batman is a closeted super hero geek who was 100% freaking out the first time he met Superman and is just REALLY good at hiding it.

superman: so what do you do in your free time? batman, thinking about the superman fanfiction he's writing on the batcomputer: i have no free time

bruce and oliver be like boyfriends to co-workers 401k (do the justice leagues get 401ks??? not that bruce and ollie would need them, but-)

lmao yes just 400 thousand words of bruce realising 'oh dip oliver is such a fucking dumbass' (also i don't know what a 401 k is but i assume they don't?)

Gothamites would totally boo superman as he saves Gotham while batman is out. @meenje

he's like 'okay think about that next time you want to be saved from an alien octopus'

I just took long break from dc comics and I come back to see ric grayson ??

i think it's very cool and sexy of dc to see dick and just think 'you know what? let's just give him a traumatic brain injury' and then didn't develop his character in any real way

SPEAKING OF RIC GRAYSON, gothamites making confused memes out of ric grayson is much needed

'dick grayson is my taxi driver? can anyone explain what the fuck happened he looks like an italian plumber?'

i hate to say it but batfam are def "marvel characters" in that sense they are characters who are human but become superheroes unlike most dc characters who are gods trying to be human maybe this is why I like batfam

fair enough

[mumblesplash]

i'm sorry i've been going through your art of the bat boys, and i've fallen in absolute love (and i'm not even in the fandom??) your characterization of Dick being a Good Big Brother? i adore it. Tim having long enough hair for a cute man bun? some might say i loved it too much. your funny dialogue with Jason and Damian? i couldn't stop giggling

i just love your art and blog so much, and it made me smile and so happy, and i wanted to share with you <3<3

thank you! that’s so nice n i appreciate you telling me <3 i love hearing when my fanart ends up getting people invested in fandoms they aren’t part of, cause 1) hey same hat (at least at first, pretty sure i count as in the bat fandom by now) and 2) it’s like :) i did it i drew them well enough to convey character hell yes :)))

haha also rip tim’s hair, which is always just whatever length i feel like drawing it at any given moment despite having decided on consistent hairstyles for everyone else. there is no rhyme or reason to it, today it might be too short to put up but tomorrow? who knows. tim’s hair is unbound by the laws of science

[lostmarblehornets]

Hello...I'm sorry to bother you, bit would it be ok if I got Brian/Hoodie or Jay/Skully headcannons with a small, really shy, s/o, please?

Don’t worry, you aren’t a bother at all! I enjoyed writing this a lot! I too am small and really shy pshshshs

People who have been tagged per their request!: @ilkayri, @toastingstardust

The Small Moments

Brian

Brian loves it, honestly!

Brian’s personality fits very well with yours

Someone like him is very welcoming to someone who’s shy

Despite being an extrovert, Brian is very soft-spoken

Brian is just one of those people that people naturally feel comfortable around

He also loves to tease you about your height

Brian rarely teases you vocally

The closest is him calling you “smalls” as a reference to the Sandlot

But he WILL use your head as a makeshift armrest

Brian will also place things just out of your reach

Just so he gets to watch you struggle and laugh

After he’s gotten his enjoyment though, he’ll “come to your rescue”

In general, Brian is pretty mischievous with you

He loves making flirtatious comments and watching you get all flustered

The man has a way with words

Another thought:

Brian keeps a keen eye out for you

He always has ever since he picked up on your shyful nature

He knows all too well about situations becoming overwhelming

Always willing and there to be an escape from an engulfing situation

More thoughts!:

Brian is very much willing to be both a big and little spoon

He loves how his entire form can envelope with yours

How lovingly your delicate hands run through his locks as he enfold into your stomach

Also, Brian loves holding hands with you

His hands are REALLY warm and completely envelope yours

Brian also like resting his hand on the small of your back

He also really enjoys resting his head atop of yours

Even while standing and in public

Also cherishes that he has to lean down just a tad so you can kiss him 

And another:

One by one, Brian introduced you to his group of friends

Of course, he had you meet Tim first

Brian was slightly worried about his friend’s overly cold exterior conflicting with your bashful nature

The first time you had met Tim there was a lot of side-way glancing from both of you

But as you two began talking on your own terms, you hit it off quite well!

Your shy nature actually allowed Tim to feel less threatened in a way, allowing him to warm up to you

Soon after followed Jay, Seth, and ultimately Alex

It was a slow process, but Brian knew your limits!

Hoody-Centered Moments

The first time you had come into contact with the hooded figure was abrupt and terrifying to be sure

You had woken up to the sounds of rustling coming from out in the living room

You had crept out quietly, thinking not much of it, but it was better to be safe than sorry

Past the hallway, the warm glow of what you’d guess to be coming from the lamp that sat beside the couch

As you made the turn, you clamped a hand over your mouth to sneak away your gasp

Apparently, it wasn’t hidden well enough

Lingering red sockets landed upon your shaking form, crimson frown ever present

You froze on the spot and before you could even begin to collect yourself, the figured ripped its mask away

Before you, sat a beaten and bruised Brian

His lip trembled, eyes glued to you as a raw drop of blood weeped from his blemished nose

You rushed forward

You caressed and soothed each and every wound

All the while, Brian never spoke a word

That is until you pressed your honeyed lips upon a prominent gash across his cheek

That action was quickly followed by a mumble, “идите на хуй.”

From that moment on, Hoodster always came around your home when injured

It’s quite often for him to call you something by the lines of “кошечка”

After everything, Hoody’s favorite place to find himself at the end of the day is in your arms, in bed and at home

Jay

Small Flustered, meet Tall Flustered

Tall Flustered, meet Small Flustered

When it comes to demeanor, the two of you are incredibly similar

That on its own has its pros and cons

Pro: The two of you understand one another and your anxieties. 

Pro: You are able to read the other like a book and know when to pull them away from a situation before it becomes too much

Pro: The best nights are those spent together, alone, just enjoying the moment and the others company

Con: You two of you couldn’t and wouldn’t interact on your own. Neither of you would initiate anything

It took Alex literally walking over and introducing you two:

You had just been sitting at your seat, minding your own business, but every once in a while, you’d spare a quick glance at Jay

At the very moment, it appeared Jay was arguing with Alex; his teeth gritted, a blue eyed gaze stuck on Kralie. Jay’s voice was kept in a tight hush, a vibrant blush decorating his cheeks.

Alex appeared to be wearing a near opposite expression. Alex was leaning back comfortably, arms crossed over his chest. His signature smug grin coyed with his features, his voice anything but a quiet hush, “Jay, it’s easy. Watch.” Alex unlocked his arms and stood up from his chair. Jay sat there utterly taken aback as his friend marched on over to where you sat.

“Y/N, right?”

You sat much straighter at the sudden intrusion, your gaze locking with Alex’s. You could almost feel his mischief radiate off of him. “Um, yeah, what is it?”

Just as Alex appeared to open his mouth, there was a sudden outburst of noise, the sound of things falling over. You looked past Alex for a moment, he too looked back, to see Jay sprawled out on the ground, trying desperately to pull his leg free from his chair, his gaze jumping from Alex’s to yours in a panicked daze. Alex pinched the bridge of his nose, letting out a long sigh. “Listen, my friend Jay over there,” Alex jerked a thumb over his shoulder, “wants to take you out somewhere.”

The shuffling behind Alex finally ended as Jay appeared right behind Alex, his cheeks dusted in color, “H-hey.” 

Your eyes widened, “H-hey.” The two of you ogled one another

Alex gave an impish chuckle, “I’ll leave you two to it,” turning on his heel, patting Jay on the back as he walked past

There’s where it all began

Physical Affection!:

Jay absolutely adores intertwining your pinkies as you two do things separately

You may be reading a book while he edits a new project, but guess what??

Your pinkies?? INTERLOCKED

He also loves holding your hand

Jay adores the fact his hand envelopes yours

While holding hands, Jay subconsciously rubs his thumb over your knuckles

His thumb is quite large compared to your small knuckles

Jay loves to nestle his face into the crook of your neck

Skully-Centered Moments

Skully tries to keep himself separate from you almost entirely

He misses you dearly, but couldn’t bring himself to even give the possibility of you becoming mixed up in all of this

By any chance that he does interact with you, he’s very delicate

His touch is very soft and gentle

And he approaches you slowly, VERY much unlike Hoody

Will also leave you gifts!

A lot of the time they are small stones he had found beside a river

Or a bouquet of wildflowers

He thinks and cares for you while he is away but knows his presence while in his masked state may drag you into this mess 

When Jay does come back after a while of radio silence, please welcome him in the open arms. He’s tired and worried, please comfort him through it

[caffeinatedtimdrake]

Hi! I don't know if you're still taking requests (congrats on 200+ by the way!!! You deserve us all you gem :D) but if you are, can I request 47 ("I'm fine." "You don't look fine." "Then stop looking.") with Timmy? Thank you if you can do it, and don't worry about it of you can't!!! Again, congrats on the milestone :D 💙💙💙

hello!! you are the real gem here. I hope this is okay! about 1.5k of Tim x Reader fluff.

also requested by the wonderful @prettylittlebrownskingyal

47.“I’m fine.” “You don’t look fine.” “Then stop looking.”

The bitter taste of failure lingers on your tongue, tugging the corners of your mouth downward into grimace. 

Tim regarded you through ocean eyes, peaking over the top of his computer manual cautiously. 

“I don’t want to talk about it.” You grumble, low voice reverberating off the walls of the study room, applying perhaps too much pressure to your pencil because the tip snaps off. 

You don’t even flinch. 

“Okay, okay. If you say so.” He chirps, glancing back down to the jumble of letters and symbols. 

Barely ten seconds pass before his gaze flits back up to study you. There’s a storm in your eyes and a crinkle in between your eyebrows and he can’t help the ache in his chest at the sight of you so troubled. 

A lump forms in your throat because you can feel the concern swimming in Tim’s gaze and it brings warmth to your cheeks. You know him too well to conceal your distress – and he’s too privy to Bruce’s intel, anyway. 

Last night had been a disaster, heavy emphasis on dis. You were supposed to be in and out of the lab in less than an hour with a USB full of information on a new genetic research program without a hassle. 

That’s not quite how things played out.

It thrilled you to no end that Barbara was allowing you to operate a mission solo. This was your chance to prove your worth; that Babs hadn’t made a mistake training you, that you were just as capable as the boys, that you could handle the pressures of heroic vigilantism.  

Several unexpected firewalls, a newly upgraded security system, and one untied boot left you panicked and cornered by a dozen security guards in a hallway colored a dizzyingly bright, institutional white, gripping a bat-shaped USB so tightly your knuckles ached beneath sleek leather gloves. Nightwing had to drop in and save you; you, someone who was supposed to be a hero – you were supposed to do the saving, not be saved. 

Once you reached the exit, helping an injured Nightwing along, you heard Babs in your ear, a frantic static buzz, reassuring you that it was okay things didn’t go according to plan, that you still succeeded in downloading the information, that your safety was the most critical. 

When you got back to the Batcave, tugging off your shoes and ripping off your mask, your face burned with disappointment. The embarrassment smothered you, shame tightly gripping your spine, infamy radiating from your nerves.Babs watched you with concern, placing a warm hand on your shoulder and attempting to impart words of comfort to ease the weight of guilt upon your shoulders. 

“Y/N, really, it’s alright. Don’t beat yourself up about it.”

“Nightwing got beat up because I made a mistake. I let you all down.” You had sulked, pulling on your coat and avoiding her fretful honey gaze. 

She looked at you for several long moments before sighing deeply. It was hard to dig yourself out of this despair in the moment and she knew you needed to let the dust settle before you would take any of her words to heart. So instead of squeezing you in a tight, reassuring hug, she rubbed your back and told you to sleep well. 

You slept. Not well, but you slept. 

The next day had been filled with classes and granola bars and a new pack of highlighters, courtesy of a kindly Tim Drake. 

And now you’re nestled in a Gotham University library study room with the aforementioned boy, trying (and failing) to take notes on ANOVA tests. 

Part of you revels in his worry – it tugged at your heartstrings to know he cared about you, sweet affinity flowering in your chest. But it was a scary thing to be vulnerable, to share your fear of inferiority with a boy that seemed so perfect. You wanted to be the best someday, but you were only starting out, so you’d settle for being good. 

Last night had been bad, to say the least, and you couldn’t shake the heavy drag of inadequacy on your mind. 

Several minutes pass, silent save for the clean swipe of highlighter against paper, before Tim sighs deeply and sits back in his chair. 

“Are you sure you’re okay?” He frowns and narrows his eyes, pretty mouth pulled into a pout. 

Posture rigid, you meet his eyes. “I’m fine.” You tell him stiffly, setting the stick of neon yellow down on the table. 

“You don’t look fine.” 

“Then stop looking.” You snap, immediately flushing with shame when you see Tim recoil. 

“W-wait, Tim, I’m sorry, that was mean. I appreciate your concern.” You ramble, leaning over the table with wide eyes. 

He recovers from your sharp words quickly and leans closer, too. He places his hand over your own, soft skin and an even softer gaze. 

You think you might lose yourself in the soulful maze of cornflower blue, reflecting deep disquiet for your well-being. You don’t know much, but you know that he wishes for your happiness and the thought makes your insides fizz with warmth. 

“Y/N, you work so hard at everything you do. Give yourself some credit, okay? One mistake does not define you.” Tim’s tone is soothing caress over your heated skin and you’re too frazzled to look anywhere but your hands. 

The set of his mouth is determined. “You’re doing amazing, sweetie.” He quotes a meme and your promptly burst into tears. 

Tim is so startled by your reaction, he can only pale three shades and gawk at you. 

But you’re incapable of choking back the waterworks, a violent torrent of hysterical tears above what might be amused laughter – he can’t quite tell, and neither can you. 

Your shoulders shake, eyes shut tightly and tears streaking down your cheeks.When you sob out an apology, he snaps out of his daze. He squeezes your hand and rounds the table to kneel next to you. He’s not quite sure how to optimally console you, but minimizing physical distance seems like a promising start because you throw your arms around his shoulders and blubber about how awful you feel. 

“I-I want to make Babs p-proud and Bruce and Dick and a-and you, oh god.” You hiccup. 

Brow furrowed, he pulls back to look at you, placing his hands on the sides of your face. 

“Oh, Y/N, you make all of us so proud, you’re always doing so well and striving to improve. It’s an honor to work with you, it would be impossible not to feel proud of you.” 

“How can you be proud of me when I ugly cry about an untied shoe?” You croak and he tenderly wipes your cheeks with his sleeve, soft cotton and a sweet, sweet sigh. 

Tim cracks a smile and it reaches his eyes, a tiny ray of sunshine in this storm of emotion. “Because I know you care so much about what you do. Your mentors appreciate that, and I adore that.”

You freeze, caught off guard enough to reduce the weeping to sniffling. “A-adore?” 

He reddens, blinking rapidly. His hands and his gaze move away shyly. “Well, of course.” He clears his throat. 

A quiet sort of calm washes over the two of you where your breathing evens out and Tim looks at you like you’re rose petals in the wind. 

A sharp knock on the door spooks you so suddenly that you yelp and nearly fall out of the chair.

Tim falls flat on his butt. 

Through the glass door, a librarian scowls at you intensely and wiggles her finger in disapproval before stalking away. 

“I think that made me feel more ashamed than last night.” You whisper. 

“I can go get you hot chocolate and a cookie from the café. Would that make you feel better?” 

You ponder this for a moment. “That might be nice actually.” 

“Crying warrants cookies, I think.” 

The pressure of despair slowly begins to float away, like a red-seeded dandelion unraveling in the wind because Tim’s smile makes you feel so light.

“If you say so.” 

Tim moves to leave, and you stand to stretch, but quickly lean over to peck his cheek. 

The boy freezes on the spot, heat rising in his face so rapidly, you almost expect steam and can’t help the broken giggle that erupts from your throat. 

“You okay, Tim?” 

He barely even blinks, turning away from you slowly. “I’m fine.” 

“You don’t look fine.” 

This seems to revive him, a slow grin spreading across his face, and he turns back to you. 

He glances at you, eyes dancing with mirth, and you look at his lips, thinking for one beautiful moment that he might kiss you.

But the librarian knocks on the glass again. 

“I think everything is going to be okay.”