#over-analyzes everything bc brain too big

[thelionandtheeagle]

Do you guys wanna see something so immensely Tim Drake it kills the man? (In a good way. Affectionately. I love him so much)

There's so much that could be said here, it's great

[wishlikes]

my love of ‘you can’t die in the prison dimension’ vs krang prime literally said a bunch of other krang died in the prison dimension (aka the brain rot is strong and i needed to use my big words)

one of my biggest pet peeves is when an element of a fic is treated as canonical when it is in actuality refuted in canon, or there is heavy evidence against it in canon (i.e. one of leo’s swords staying in the prison dimension when they were shown in the movie to fall in the same path after being smacked out of Leo’s hands). However, the popular prison dimension mechanics that appear in fics (inability to die and time dilation) are incredibly interesting. It helps that the first is almost always accompanied by the second, which is usually acknowledged as being a canon divergence or au element.

Because I’m insane, I’m gonna analyze those elements under the assumption that the four warriors who created the key and locked away the krang also created the prison dimension itself and had some input into its design. Now that i say this, it’s a pretty big assumption. Perhaps the prison dimension existed before the key, inaccessible, and they tapped into it by chance. Maybe by creating the key, they created the prison dimension, but had no say in how it functioned. I can imagine that they weren’t too picky about where the krang ended up or in what situation as long as it was ‘not here’.

Anyway, if the warriors did have any input to the design and functioning of the prison dimension, the inability of the occupants to die makes no sense (and not just bc it goes directly against something stated in canon). These guys wanted to get rid of the krang by any means necessary. Even if these guys were from the ‘we don’t kill our enemies no matter what’ persuasion, purposely preventing any death at all is a wildly wtf move. And if we go the ‘prison made for undying eternal torment’ route, that is still dangerously reckless since the key can’t be destroyed, preventing a guarantee of the krangs’ continued imprisonment.

Time dilation! Time dilation is fun, especially since there are two kinds. The one where time passes quicker in the prison dimension (i.e. 10 minutes in there equals 1 month outside it) would only make sense as a purposeful design feature if the warriors who made the key thought that the krang finding a way to escape from the inside is not only possible, but a more likely possibility than anyone using the key to release them. On the other hand we have the time dilation where time passes slower in the prison dimension (i.e. 1 month in there equals 10 minutes outside). This makes more sense if the key is the only known/believed method of escape. The point in both cases is to buy humanity as much time as possible.

Now personally, under the assumption that the warrior guys made the prison dimension, ability to die + time passes slower makes the most sense to me. HOWEVER. inability to die is just so much fun you guys. it makes NO SENSE unless the warrior guys weren’t picky about where they were sending the krang and (more importantly to me) GOES DIRECTLY AGAINST CANON. but. leo. the horror of surviving something he knows he shouldn’t have. the horror of watching his body be broken and torn apart over and over again. the horror of knowing it’s never going to end. never. he didn’t want to die, but the unfathomable endless eternity is stretching out in front of him and he KNOWS that at some point (if he’s not there already) that death is going to look like a cruelly withheld mercy.

it’s so good, man. i hate it bc it goes against canon, but i love it for everything else

[renxias]

Batfam reading habits ( part 1):

duke: definitely dog ears pages, also uses any item he can find as a bookmark, memorized what page number he left on at times if there is no bookmark or is too much in a rush to bookmark. Tends to like to read on the hard floor with a blanket bunched up underneath and will stay in one position for hours. Also genuinely believe duke has adhd and will often opt for audiobooks when he has bad brain days and sometimes reading books can feel impossible and make him nauseous. In addition, when he finds a book he loves he cannot put it down and will talk about it for weeks and create theories if possible. He also tends to constantly annotate his books and will have a habit of using quotes from the book in everyday vocabulary and just LOVES watching other people pick apart and analysis his favorite books online.

preferred book choice for duke: not necessarily picky he’ll read almost everything ranging from classics to cheesy romance; HOWEVER, he’s more selective when it comes to sci-fi as in he’s not terrible big on the ones that take place in space. DUNE definitely one of his all time favorites though. Additionally, thrillers and mind games are up there in his favorite genres he finds them so exciting and they suck him in.

damian: he has a specialized bookmark that he was gifted from bruce and literally will never pass up any opportunity to use it. At times he is also notorious for memorizing book page numbers if he doesn’t have his bookmark on hand and absolutely despises dog-earring pages he gets upset at duke and tim over it because they’re dog-ear contenders. He literally reads in dead silence or he’ll listen to classical but only pieces in a minor key. He tends to love reading with Titus on his lap or next to him on his bed. He also has a designated spot next to the fire place and often falls asleep there reading after patrol is finished for the night. Once he finds a book he loves he will constantly pick words to use in his everyday vocabulary and tends to talk nonstop about the book only with certain people ( e.g jason, bruce, dick, duke, and maya). He constantly annotates his books as well same as duke and uses tabs for his favorite sections. He also isn’t terribly big on audiobooks and loathes sitting through them bc he could just read it himself yknow.

preferred book choice for damian: god he loves horror, classics ( especially gothic ones), anything and everything greek tragedies, mystery, and he has a soft spot for historical fiction romance. He also is a giant PJO fan and was super into reading the series of unfortunate events for a while. Shoujo manga is also a go-to.

steph:

well she oh my god collects audiobooks like crazy because sitting and reading a physical copy is difficult for her. Often times whenever she does choose to read a physical copy she’ll get carsick and often will feel nauseous and throw up so she finds it easier to read upside down from her bed with the blood rushing to her head. Forgets to annotate but when she does she will go crazy with it, writing constant comments in the margins. She also will use anything as a bookmark and even used flattened take out box once for one. Also one of her preferred reading spots is in cass’s room or with barbara. She likes reading under the table in the manor and tends to switch positions a lot when reading and gets up frequently for snack breaks in between. Once she gets hooked into a book steph has a tendency to block people out and not hear when they’re calling her. She’ll also rattle on and on about the book or it turns in her head like a microwave. She doesn’t mind analyzing the characters but god she has strong opinions about various literature and even literary devices it’s unreal and talks constantly about them with Jason and damian. She has to read with noise or else.

preferred books choice for steph: loves horror, historical fiction specifically the romantic ones, cheesy romance, she also loves greek tragedies with a female mc, wlw, she cannot really stand sci-fi I feel like that’s definitely her least favorite genre as well as nonfiction atleast some of them. Also poetry is a favorite specifically those that make her feel airy and light. She reads them a lot depending on her mood.

cass:

she’ll often switch from audiobooks to physical copies but she also tends to LOVE e-books. She has a bookmark that was gifted to her by both bruce and steph but most of the time she will just lay the book flat out whenever she pauses her reading time. She sometimes will begin her workouts by listening to oscar wilde poetry or even poe bc she tends to really like gothic poetry. She also listens to audiobooks to help her sleep at night since it’s relaxing and comforting but she’s super picky about the person reading. She finds it surprisingly comfortable to lay on not only the hard wood floor in the manor similar to duke, but she also will read a lot on the bathroom floor with her favorite blanket ( it’s a edward scissor hands themed one with an added hood that has cat ears). Once she finds a book she loves there’s just no putting it down she has to read it everywhere and anywhere. She’s not terribly big on annotating heavily but she definitely loves highlighting her favorite quotes and makes a miniature word wall full of the words she finds endearing in her room. Can read without music but loves listening to gothic rock to help her get into the mood of things.

preferred genre for cass: gothic literature/ poetry, she’s such a big tolkien fan, loves mystery especially sherlock holmes super into him and can talk nonstop about it with steph and babs and they love listening her talk about it. Fantasy is also a preferred genre for her and when she first read jane eyre she stayed up for days trying to finish and tends not to budge.

tim:

this man loves him an audiobook that’s for sure and will always opt for one. He also has a kindle but occasionally he’ll have a physical copy which he loves marking up so heavily. ALSO he dog ears pages like crazy which pisses off Jason. Tim also just tends to ruin his books as in he’ll break the spine open and continue reading books multiple times until they fall apart. The flipside to this is that he tends to forget that a certain book exists after getting so far into them regardless if they’re an e-book or a physical copy. He also will constantly add more and more books to his TBR list and read like 4 books at once which is something jason and duke do consistently ( NOTE: not so much dick because he needs to focus on one book at a time and sometimes he’ll read 2 at the same time). He prefers parallel play when reading so he’ll invite bernard to come do his own thing while he reads. His designated reading spot is the kitchen counter and the batcave spinning chair. The amount of times alfred, bruce, or dick has found him just passed out while reading in the bat computer chair is absence. Once he finds a book he loves there’s no putting it down, he’ll constantly talk about it all the time make references to the book in everyday conversation and even create theories and make spreadsheets depending on the book. Also cannot read without music and often listens to 80s rock music.

preferred genre for tim: god he loves thriller and mystery one of his all time favorites as well as fantasy. Super big on LOTR ( bonds with cass about it), the witcher, and just any fantasy series he’s not picky at all. he has super strong opinions on fantasy as a genre and especially when it comes to the magic systems. He has a giant soft spot for oscar wilde and enjoys reading russian literature, comics, and french literature.

dick:

LOVES LOVES audiobook listening for patrols and long ones especially moby dick hes read that countless times and probably one of the first books he ever read at the manor besides Robin Hood. Also tends to prefer romantic and atmospheric poetry when trying to fall asleep whenever he does listen to one for napping purposes it lulls him straight to sleep. He’s also not really one for reading e-books since it gives him a massive headache so he tend to opt for physical copies. This seems incredibly ironic considering his job as a vigilante does require him to look at screens most of the time but yes. He shifts around a lot when reading because he cant really find a comfortable spot and just stay there so he’ll move from chair to chair whilst holding the same book which drives Alfred insane as well as kory whenever they’re at home together. His preferred reading spot definitely varies as sometimes he’ll have weeks where he’s super into reading solely in a chair and changing positions in the same chair. While other weeks it’s him being super absorbed with reading on the kitchen counter. He also a stretcher when reading and will put his leg above he’s head at times. He’s definitely a crier when reading romance and even certain quotes just kinda bring him to tears easily. Once he gets into a book he really enjoys there’s just no getting through he’ll just not register the other person calling him and can’t stop thinking about it. Will constantly talk about the book, make references during fights, and just annotates like crazy.

preferred genres for dick: oh he’s a lover of all things heroic, he loves books with a heroic main character in most fashions. He’s a giant fan of six of crows for sure as well and fantasy is a favorite. Will never pass up a thrilling classic and mysteries are also an enjoyable favorite. He also has a very soft spot for romance and tends to read romantic short stories whenever he’s taking a break from reading a larger work.

bruce:

hes a physical copy kind of guy 100% which is why it took him such a weird time to get adjusted to reading e-books but they just give him a headache unless he’s wearing his glasses. I also honestly have a headcannon that bruce has an astigmatism so at times reading can make him nauseous without wearing them regardless if he’s in a moving car or not. When he was younger he read so much and devoured books which a lot of his recs came from both his dad and alfred later along the line. tim highly encouraged him to make a goodreads account since he mainly would keep his reading list in a google doc or in his notebook for safe keeping. His preferred reading spot also varies between his bedroom, the wayne family library, and the couch next to the fireplace as that was his designated story time place when he was a young lad. He doesn’t really move terribly much when reading, but he tends to constantly run his hand through his hair and keep it above his head while the other turns pages. Additionally, he’s also super picky about the physical kind of book which is also a habit that damian has as well. It’s a sensory thing that certain books need to be hard cover while others might not be as such. He has to read in dead silence with noise cancelling headphones and a cozy quilt made via the whole family. ALSO he loves reading with a warm drink as his preferred one is coffee or earl grey. Once he gets super into a book he won’t necessarily speak about in excess; however, he’ll constantly recommend the book to everyone but he most definitely has a soft spot about reading certain sections of the book to clark. He also just writes about his thoughts concerning the book constantly in his journal.

preferred genre for bruce: CLASSICS. He also enjoys psychological horror specifically.

jason: ( I had to leave him last otherwise it would’ve been ungodly long bc he is my favorite unfortunately.) ANYWAYS, he’s 100% a physical copy kind of guy; however, he loves audiobooks whenever his brain isn’t cooperating ( he also has adhd in my head). In this case, he tends to listen a lot to audiobooks during patrol and during family meetings whenever what is being said is unbearable so it helps a bit more with focusing. Just like Tim he has a major tendency for reading books multiple times until they fall apart and bends the spine frequently. He also loves annotating and will get so absorbed into it that he forgets to read the rest of the book especially if he’s just reading it for the first time. He has to wear glasses while reading otherwise headache does ensue and he’ll have to take a break and break up reading into chunks. ALSO has a goodreads account and has way too many books on his TBR. Additionally, when reading he tends to have two pillows one for his back just in case and just one he keeps underneath for his chest. Once he finds a book he loves there’s no stopping him talking about it. He has super strong opinions about literature especially when it comes to book to movie adaptations and frequently shares those opinions with duke, dick, steph, and damian since they all have a small bookclub together. He also will make theories constantly and frequently write reviews on his favorite books on goodreads as well as a pinboard dedicated to character analysis. In addition, also quotes a lot when he finds a new book he loves. He devoured books as a kid and constantly would hole up in the manor library, check out numerous books at the library, and read a lot under the table. ALSO him and Alfred often have a designated Wednesday where they just talk about books and share tea with each other and it’s the most heartfelt moment. His preferred reading spot also varies from his bedroom, roy’s room, the wayne manor library, and the carpet with his favorite hoodie.

preferred genre for jason: CLASSICS. Also he was a giant PJO kid and was deeply infatuated with maximum ride books as well. He has a giant spot for Greek tragedies, shakespeare, and a deep lover of poetry and often shares edgar allen poe recs with cass since they bond over poetry. He also really likes modern romance books which he tends to compare classic romantic literature and more recent. Also an avid fan of kafka and reads a lot of russian literature. vampire novels are also a guilty pleasure cannot resist as well as gothic literature an all time favorite.

ADDITIONAL STUFF:

yeah I think jason definitely argues with people over literature super frequently and it gets heated in all honesty. Also I hc that everyone in the batfam has either adhd or autism and you can’t change my mind about it 100%.

[wendytestabrat]

WHAT I THINK THE JIMMY NEUTRON CHARACTER’S BIG 3 ARE IN ASTROLOGY

alright let’s do this shit. this is a continuation of the post analyzing the sp character’s big 3 go read that one first. YOUR BIG THREE IS YOUR RISING, SUN, & MOON. THE THREE LAYERS OF AN ONION. YOUR RISING IS HOW YOU APPEAR, YOUR SUN IS WHO YOU ARE, AND YOUR MOON IS YOUR DEEP EMOTIONAL SIDE. and yeah i’m pretty sure all of their sun signs have been confirmed by the show bc their birthdays are all floating around on the internet LOL.

JIMMY:

yeah jimmy is a LEO rising. there's no doubt about it. the amount of ego and superiority this one kid has is fucking insane. he's a stubborn shithead who thinks he's always right and wants to lead and be in charge. he has rizz which is why he fools all the citizens of retroville into thinking he's a brave hero even tho all the problems he fixes HE fucking caused. but yeah he's actually a pisces sun bc jimmy is an oversensitive baby who runs on his emotions for fucking everything. his imagination is out of control and he gets all of these wildass ideas to make stupid ass inventions in retaliation bc a girl was picking on him at school without making an effort to actually have the inventions work for real LOL classic piscean nonsense (which is why i hate them). and down to the final layer of the onion the boy is an aquarius moon...i mean come on do i even need to explain why? even tho jimmy is an overly sensitive beta male he still sucks at relating to people emotionally and is way too fucking logical and aloof abt shit. all he cares abt is science. if he had the choice between some pussy and some physics formulas he would choose the latter.

CARL:

carl is honestly so boring i couldn't give two shits about him bc he has no development outside of being a comic relief. but bro is a cancer rising. carl comes across like a whiny ass baby that's gentle and fragile af but yeah he's actually just double earth. he's a capricorn sun bc carl is like realistic and down to earth af especially compared to jimmy with his retarded delusional ass pisces mind. carl can be the voice of reason sometimes when jimmy wants to do some dumbass shit and he'll caution him abt it & keep him grounded. carl likes to play it safe which is also why he's a taurus moon bc all bro wants to do is stay home and eat and watch the llama channel.

SHEEN:

yeah sheen is a gemini rising he talks way too fucking much about random ass shit LOL. he always has something interesting or witty to say and sometimes he'll just reference something out of nowhere. he also has way too much fucking energy and is ADHD af. but sheen is actually a scorpio bc he's rlly passionate and focuses really intensely on his ultra lord and action figure collecting hobby. he's also rlly caring & loyal af to the people he cares abt (like libby or his dad) and brave too and willing to put himself in dangerous situations to help his friends. in my personal experience i've noticed that scorpio sun tends to bring out the more lighthearted, caring, and sensitive side of scorpio while scorpio moons and scorpio mars are the more fucked up and vengeful types LOL. and yeah he's a sag moon bc sheen is SUPER fun, enthusiastic, and optimistic and always up for an adventure. he can be brutally honest too and there are a lot of moments in the show where he roasts the shit out of another character over some dumb shit they're doing. (yeah sheen is actually way smarter than he seems he just sabotaged his brain with cartoons and sugar as he said in that one episode LOL)

CINDY:

yeah cindy is an aries rising which was honestly the easiest fucking rising sign to pick LOL. she comes across EXTREMELY aggressive and physically strong. cindy is competitive af and has to be #1 at everything. but yeah she's a gemini bc that bitch is the world's biggest smartass and likes to be smarter than everyone and she runs her mouth constantly and never shuts the fuck up LOL. she’s a two faced bitch who pretends to hate jimmy to be cool even tho she’s obsessed with him. cindy’s intelligent af and always has something witty and clever to say and she can charm and manipulate the shit out of anyone bc of this. and she’s social af and has like 58389392 interests and hobbies and wants to be good at everything. but yeah cindy is actually a scorpio moon bc she’s sensitive AF and rlly caring deep down in an obsessive scorpio way and the bitch WILL fucking bite back at you if you slight her over something small. she’s possessive AF and gets jealous easily too like a typical scorpio too LOL.

LIBBY:

yeah libby is DEF an aqua rising bc the bitch is weird af and she comes across super aloof and in her own little world. i mean the bitch has headphones on like 90% of the time and is always listening to music and then when someone finally does get her attention she just rambles on abt some random shit no one cares about like how she's related to cleopatra or how she loves some random ass hip-hop group LOL (no wonder her and sheen ended up together). but yeah she's actually just a sag sun bc libby is EXTREMELY outgoing, fun & adventerous and she also has a temper if u mess with her and she doesn't have the patience for fake stupid bullshit like how she calls cindy out on her gemini ass for pretending to hate jimmy when she likes him. and then she's a libra moon bc libby is like the voice of reason sometimes in the group and the only sane sensible one LOL. she mediates A LOT of conflicts like when jimmy and cindy are fighting or sheen and carl are fighting.

[thehighladywrites]

— “Okay, but in what way do you love me?”

☀︎ — pairing: tutor/nerd azriel x bimbo/ditzy reader

☀︎ — summary: It’s confession time! Last night you said you like him but over analyzing azriel needs to know exactly what “like” means.

☀︎ — warnings: 18+, mdni, smut, confessions, creampie, fluff, azriel needs clarification even though you are VERY clear

☀︎ — amara’s note: pls enjoy and lemme know what u think💗 also sorry for it being short it’s only bc i’m posting another drabble very soon, and it’s a personal favorite 👀💗

series masterlist

“Why are you staring at me, Az? Is there something on my face?” you ask panicked as you grab your hand mirror on his desk and check your flawless face

Azriel's gaze softens as he speaks, “No, there's nothing on your beautiful face. I just like looking at you. And, I want to ask you something.”

You exhale calmly, pleased with your appearance, as you turn your body towards him, jewelry jangling.

His stomach feels leaden, and he feels nauseous. What if your version of "like" and his version of "like" aren't the same? What if you say you like him, but only in a friendly way? What if this was all lust and you only wanted to fuck him? What if by “like” you meant you liked the sex?

You are miles out of his league, but he's not complaining. You actually make him happy and mushy when you call and ask him to go on little shopping trips with you, and it’s even better when you let him fuck your brains out from time to time. But he is in love, like deeply fucking in love.

“Okay. Do you recall—remember yesterday when you said you liked me? Do you want to clarify what that means? Why do you like me?”

The question makes you tilt your head in confusion, brows drawing in curiosity as you pull the strawberry-flavored lollipop from your mouth, resulting in a loud pop, lips covered in a thin layer of sticky, red residue.

“Wait, huh? What do you mean, Azzie? I don’t like you, I love you.”

Oh my fucking god, what? Okay, so he was literally about to throw the fuck up but he was a little hesitant to respond. Azriel couldn't help but think about the meaning behind your words. You were always so bubbly and affectionate, even with strangers. Did your "I love you" hold the same weight every time, or was it just another sprinkle of your charm?

“Okay, I hear you but in what way do you love me? Do you mean it as a friend or—?” He questions behind his glasses.

Azriel had, for the first time ever, brought you to his dorm. You were just laying in bed next to him but decided to straddle his lying body, smiling as his hands automatically held your thighs.

“No silly! I loooove you and I want you to be my boyfriend. You’re so hot and sweet and kind and you care about me, like a lot. Always keepin’ me outta trouble and kissing me too. You love me too tho, right?” You gaze down at him, your big doe eyes shimmering with hope, and your glossy bottom lip slightly quivering.

Love you? He was almost insanely obsessed with you. There was something about you that drove him crazy. How could he not love you? He gives you an assuring nod, all of your previous worries disappearing in an instant. “Yeah, I do. I love you too. So much.”

“That’s so adorable, gimme a kiss.” You puckered your lips, the sweet scent of your sweet Burberry Her Elixir filling his senses.

He tries to remove his glasses, but you stop him with a swat. “No, keep ‘em on,” you insist between kisses.

—

To no one’s surprise you were bent over his desk, getting fucked stupid as he made you list what you loved about him.

Maybe it was a little mean since you couldn’t focus, your fuzzy brain filled with pleasure, but Azriel wanted to know anyway.

“more,” he gasps, “n-need more—gimme more, sweetheart.”

So you did, saying everything you loved about him. Every single detail.

“I love it when you make me breakfast— fuck, and—and when you carry me whenever i want. ‘m so close, az,” you sob—and then, just as his thumb finds your clit again, rubbing desperate little circles to get you over the edge, you cum — harder than ever, spasming around his cock and pulling him in as you squeeze around him.

“a-azzie,” you gasp brokenly, “fuck, ‘s good—so good.”

“you’re so perfect. prettiest girl i’ve laid my fucking eyes on —prettiest pussy ever too. i, sh-shit—” he falls into his own orgasm, hot, thick ropes of cum spilling into you with every twitch of his cock, sweet little noises pulled from his throat that he sighs into your neck, fucking his load into you.

“Holy shit,” Azriel mutters before he kisses the back of your head, the biggest trail of cum he’s ever seen leaking out of you when he pulls out.

“I wanna go again, please Az, let—let me ride. I’ll tell you more things I love,” you lock eyes with him over your shoulder, a smirk playing at your lips.

Azriel obviously doesn’t deny. He’s happy someone for once in his life wants to tell him how much they love him. Especially when that someone is his first and last girlfriend💗.

🏷️: @ithan-holstroms-girl @whatdoyxumean @honeybeeboobaa @to-be-written @sidthedollface2 @stasiereads @andrewgarfield2022 @amara-moonlight @thescooby-gang @linoisqt @mischiefmanagers @tortured-artists @dwlyniii @scooobies @harryshoobies69 @caroline-books @kalulakunundrum @meshelleexplosionmurder @danikamariewrites @clairebear08 @redbleedingrose @jeannineee @rowaelinsdaughter @nocasdatsgay @v3lv3tf0x @liati2000 @teenageeggscissorslawyer @impossibelle @stonerpersona @dreamlandreader @djaaaa @callmeblaire @thelov3lybookworm @polli05927 @ahitsalyssa @evergreenlark @thegirlintheshadows101 @saltedcoffeescotch @acourtofladydeath @acourtofwhatthefuck @readychilledwine @daycourtofficial @azriels-shadowsinger @sapphicmsmarvel @hungryforbatboys @justasillylittlegoofyguy @luvmoo @emryb @meritxellao @mochibabycakes @artists-ally @azzieslittlebunny @viatorem-maris @berryzxx @riddlesb1tch @sweetshifter

[neo-shitty]

hope you dont mind me popping in to your inbox to scream abt whc1 bc you are truly the only person out of my friend circle that has watched it 😭😭 first of all

facts. he can do no wrong.

second of all its been days and i am still processing like this has never happened to me before ?? usually i am a lil :// until the rest of the day when i finish a sad drama but with this im just so heartbroken still. yesterday during a big mental breakdown (unrelated to the drama i am not THAT crazy ok) i realised why it hit me so hard and i think its bc i somehow relate to sieun (anger issues and all /j) and so i somehow projected into his character and so when it all went down with suho i just couldnt deal w it ?? I LEGIT HAD A MINI PANIC ATTACK it felt like it was happening to me 😭😭😭 like he was such comfort for me. he broke the cycle of loneliness and stereotype for sieun and i just really adored each interaction they had. the fact that they would both kill and die for each other makes me bawl my eyes out.

but when it all comes down to it, i understand beomseok, i really do, but i also dont. i dont think ill ever forgive that character, i just cant. i cant imagine how it must have felt for him and i couldnt be able to deal w life either if i was in his shoes, but my brain just cant grasp the lengths he went to hurt people that did nothing but care for him and tried to help him with everything. he's a complex character for sure, one you have to analyze to get, but i dont have it in me to have a single ounce of sympathy after the ending of the drama.

but to think that the parents and the adults were truly at fault here ?? beomseok being abused, sieun abandoned and neglected, suho not really having parents around either (i read somewhere that they are canonically abroad or something?? not too sure), the policemen not taking sieun seriously at first, the teachers seeing the shit happening and not doing anything to stop the bullying... where were everyones parents when all those kids got caught up w the gang? its truly sickening and heartbreaking to think that this truly could be happening anywhere and to anyone.

and it broke me so much bc i could accept beomseok drifting away from them and stuff, but to gang up on suho on his fucking birthday? sieun cooking and decorating with young yi and taking pics for her insta (i strongly believe her and sieuns friendship is SO underrated they were so cute together) and both of them just hid it from everyone to protect suho,, their sunshine ??? the poor boy must have been so confused and lonely on his bday and it makes me :( and then when he saw sieuns cast and went to avenge him ?? I read something about how suho always fought only in self defence but when he saw sieun hurt he crossed the line and fought with the purpose of hurting somebody only bc his best friend was put in danger and that- that broke me.

also i find it funny how i found the drama through a clip on tiktok where jihoon cried at watching the last scene where sieun breaks the window and i was like oh this should be just the right amount of sad for me rn and then i got emotionally damaged. :,)

yeah anyways my fav trope is found family and FUCK all of those who hurt my sunshine bc now im forever heartbroken.

sorry for the rant toffee but it did felt cathartic to write this all out

bar, please don't worry about it. feel free to come back any time you have to yell about it and i'll try to get back to you as soon as i can.

sooho was just too easy to love. we headed into that show blind HAHA we should've known it was too good to be true! i never saw it coming actually.

same !! took me days to get over this too. *hugs* i'm sorry about the mental breakdown, i hope you're feeling a bit better now !! oh the projection must've made the whole thing twice as hard. again, sooho was such a comfort character :( his happy go lucky nature was such a breath of fresh air esp when the themes occasionally got dark. i want that dynamic for me actually (to kill and die for each other, yes). i usually find it corny but it was so well executed here.

oh bumseok :( i think it's valid to simultaneously understand him but at the same time, find what he did unforgivable. i get where he was coming from and how he was just looking for a place to fit in—where he wasn't looked down on. idk how to describe it but when he started misreading the situation (like that whole bit abt sooho not following him on ig but following young yi), i think something in him snapped. he was so fed up with being helpless at home and at his previous school that when it happened a third time, he did everything to get back and lashed out.

I 100% BELIEVE THE ADULTS WERE ABSOLUTE SHITTIEST NEGLIGENT FUCKERS AROUND. like???? leaving a scamming syndicate to be dealt with by high schoolers?????? bumseok's fake ass politician dad??????? sure, sieun's parents were 'present' but emotionally distant, like check on your kids bitches or not have them at all god dAMN. i thought some of the aspects of the bullying were exaggerated bc from where i'm from it never gets that bad but hearing that to an extent, it was truthful about it just left me dumbfounded. how could parents allow things like this to happen under the radar? it's unbelievable and heartbreaking to me.

yeah, i thought bumseok would just join his cool boy squad but he really had to do whatever the fuck he did :D my girl, i know you read my tags and i was vile as fuck towards him but at the time i was just so angry too. also yes! youngyi and sieun's friendship <3 i wish they had more time </3 and honestly, if bumseok didn't do a whole 180, i think the four of them would make such a cute squad. like the way they would protect each other??? hmp :/

'i read something about how suho always fought only in self defence but when he saw sieun hurt he crossed the line and fought with the purpose of hurting somebody only bc his best friend was put in danger and that- that broke me.' i saw that the other day and that broke me to fucking hell i could sell anyone's soul to see them together again (SPECIFICALLY, with the other one being fine and out of comatose yes i would love that for me.

ohhh, i've been meaning to watch that vid of them reacting to whc1 but at the time it didn't have subs. jihoon's acting was so fucking effective like??? the sadness the eyes of that man has can sway me to do anything !! so sorry that you got so much more than just a little sad bout. heading into this drama blind was like bringing a knife to a whole war.

this show made me realize that tragedy could strike any pairing on any show and i wouldn't bat an eye but have the same happen to a found family and then i'm instantly destroyed. THE SHOW ACTUALLY REMINDED ME OF YOUR CHENJI FIC????? FUCK. please do let me know if you ever get around to writing something related to them haha i'm ready to be destroyed.

please do not ever apologize for ranting especially about this show !! i went through this whole phase ALONE last year (watching it after christmas was the biggest mistake, i ended my year DEPRESSED as FUCK) so i'm offering as much help as i can.

[crybabyddl]

I WOULD VERY MUCH LIKE TO REITERATE SOMETHING

Yes, let’s circle back to the beautiful performance of Edge of Great. More specifically the BODY LANGUAGE, particularly Julie and Luke’s, which I will be analyzing with gifs.

Exhibit A

Jealous Luke looks over at Julie and Reggie vibing

Julie is aware that she’s avoiding Luke, which she is doing so bc she realized her feelings for him thanks to Flynn earlier in the episode.

Since Julie has put the task of ignoring Luke upon herself even though she has no obligation to, she ends up failing her own mission. She sees Luke’s reaction to the lack of her attention.

She literally FREEZES. She’s emotionally worried to confront what she’s feeling and it’s beginning to manifest physically.

Exhibit B

It gets better y’all. After Luke finally has even a crumb of Julie’s attention, he beckons her over with his signature head tilt. This is important bc he did this with his longtime bandmate during the soundcheck of what would’ve been their biggest performance. If he feels comfortable enough using that body language with a girl he’s only known for, what, a week and a half(?) then you know this puppy boy’s got it BAD.

Julie is well aware that Luke is getting jealous. But in classic Julie fashion, she will try to tune it out instead of addressing it. Our wicked beauty doesn’t like confrontation and would rather just deny and avoid than potentially make things awkward, especially when she knows Luke would ask her about it at a later time.

The look on Julie’s face. Her eyes widen and the classic tight-lipped awkward smile is present. She’s literally saying “ok enough of that let’s get back to work doo doo doo” with her face. The way her body SWINGS back into performance mode as she faces the audience again. It may have been a split second, but when you’re deliberately trying to avoid looking into the dreamy (dead) eyes of someone you shouldn’t be crushing on, any amount of time feels too long. Plus, she knows Flynn is watching and doesn’t want her to lecture her (but she does anyway bc Flynn is observant and knows her bestie too well to let any action slip past her).

Exhibit C

Keep in mind; NONE OF THE GUYS KNOW WHY JULIE IS AVOIDING LUKE. Flynn, Alex, and Reggie have noticed the Juke chemistry, but it’s still too soon for them to get past the “we like each other but we’re too clueless to notice that we reciprocate” phase, so even though their respective besties know, they are still denying. Besides, Reg, Alex, and Flynn know better than to keep pestering if they want to keep their kneecaps. In reality they’re both smart enough to tell by this point, but for the sake of the plot and to make everything more adorably frustrating, Flynn has the collective brain cell under lock and key, leaving Juke to be like *dog tilting its head and making that “a-roo?” noise*

Anyway, Reggie notices Luke being snubbed after realizing that his extra dose of Julie time was slightly out of the ordinary. Luke is clearly concerned (look at his eyebrows and how his eyes travel from Reggie, to Julie, then to the audience to trying and get his mind off it and bring his focus back to the main goal; the performance.) If he can’t have the moment of connection with Julie that he so desperately craves, he’s gonna fill that void as best he can by connecting with the audience. >:’)

But Reggie’s trying to help Luke brush it off by conveying his reaction as ‘look at julie coming into her own! i told you she was a star! and you thought you were the lead singer? think again buddy this girl’s got you beat!’

But since Reggie isnt a master at hiding his feelings yet, especially around Luke, —who was able to get under his skin earlier (“girls, am i right?”)—Luke was easily able to see through that and interpreted what Reggie was saying as “look at julie go, she all in the zone. you’re literally making heart eyes at her get a grip you’re slacking lmao” (hence luke’s right eyebrow quirking at reggie like ‘dude seriously gimme a break u know i need attention like tinkerbell’) even though Reggie’s true message was a bit less harsh and more lovingly teasing, but it’s Luke, he sees things through his eyes and at his intensity, regardless of who it’s coming from. (This is one of the reasons why Luke comes off as selfish at times.)

Exhibit D

Poor Lukey boi can’t seem to catch a break today! Not only does Julie ignore him, then has a cute lil (platonic but it’s luke so it still makes him jealous >:P) moment, but now she has the AUDACITY to interact with Alex? The guy who was out learning Ghost 101 with this Willie guy instead of rehearsing with the band? What gives?! What’s he got that your moody ghost bf doesn’t? >:’(

He literally just watches, and even glances back in a way that, to me, screams ‘did i see that right? did i just see what i just saw with my own dreamy (but dead) eyes? say sike rn.’ \_(*_*)_/

Meanwhile, Alex pays no mind. I like to think that Alex is fully aware that Luke is an angry boy rn, but has learned to ignore it, especially this bc literally NOTHING happened. Either that or Alex has no clue and just truly thinks nothing of it and is having too much fun to think about Luke’s moody and childish behavior. Either way, Alex is just straight chilling and we love to see it *^_^*

Notice how Reggie is right there vibing with Julie and Alex. Luke feels a bit betrayed like ‘not you too! i know you were the first to turn on me but i figured since you’re such a golden retriever you’d be loyal and come back to my side!😠🥲’

Also; Luke approaches the rest of the group, wanting to be included in at least SOME of the vibing, but when Julie starts dancing and smiling with her buddy Alex, he backs up like

“you know what? nope. nevermind. not doin’ it.”

and the group’s like “i mean hey it’s your loss, but luke we want you to-”

“no, bc you chose to piss me off right in front of my face so no luke time for any of you! no cuddles, no hugs, no nothing! you made your bed, now lie in it and perish.”

Exhibit E & F: This is where it gets a bit interesting and theorized hehe...

Now we all know that this moment is just fucking ICONIC

WEOWH NEOW NEOW!!! WEOW NEHR NEHR NER-NER-NER NEHR NEHR NEOWHR!!! (wer nehr-nehr-ner-ner-nehr-nehr!!) WUEHNER-NEUHNER-NEHR-NEEOW-NEOWH! DLOOLOODDUH-DOODLAH-HOOBLUEH-NEOWHR-NEUEHR-NEEEEEEUOWRH!!!!

But hear me out– HEAR ME OUT!

What if... now don’t shoot the messenger who just so happens to also be the theorist... but what if...

WHAT IF!!! Luke didn’t!! plan this?!!!

Listen i know you’re probably thinking:

“Well uh Nicole, isn’t that kinda the whole point? It literally wasn’t planned until Charlie realized Madi was gonna be standing on the piano so he suggested the idea for the guitar solo to Kenny.”

And you’re right! But here’s the kicker:

What if Luke THE CHARACTER, just decided to do this as an “Alright that’s it! You wanna be like that? Well what if I just hit you with my super awesome radical totally cool wowza guitar skills & make a moment between us? Huh? What do you think about that? Hmm? HMMM???!!!”

He licks his lips & that to me read** like he was nervous (**read rhyming with bed just to clarify) so that means it could’ve been a spontaneous, spur-of-the-moment thing.

In the second gif, you can see that Julie’s head is tilted, as if she’s a bit confused, but she’s also delightfully surprised.

Julie is quick to smile and scrunch her nose at Luke, something she does often. It tells Luke his impulsive action garnered a positive response from his favorite girl. Julie also starts to shake her head, but doesn’t go through the motion in full, which means she’s still a bit nervous to let her guard down. This is probably because she doesn’t know what he’s thinking or what he will do next. The lopsided smile mixed with the suave, gliding steps towards her probably brought her back to her daydream lol.

Luke’s happy bc Julie’s no longer ignoring him. He smiles like a GOOBER bc this chump is simping HARD for our Julie. So cute! :’)

Exhibit G

And hear me when I offer this:

What if Luke poofed the guys out???

I know, I know. It’s a bold claim to make. But the boys are special, considering they are a threat to Caleb (3 gay-variant himbos vs. a gay magician that could’ve been on broadway but decided to make some sort of deal with a devil so he just entertains capitalists who most likely sold their souls to get into the hgc which i will probably elaborate on in a future theory so dont do that bc im gonna lmao idc we all have big brains) So it’s not too crazy to think that they could share some ghost powers.

We know Caleb transported the guys during You Got Nothing to Lose. And the guys have left a place at the exact same time on more than one occasion.

And you may be thinking “well what if the guys poofed out to give juke a moment alone together?” And to that I say...

Look at Reggie. He isn’t looking back at Alex like “dude let’s give them some space.”

The timing of him turning around, at least to me, makes me think Reggie was surprised by Luke approaching the piano. (But also he lowkey was waiting for Luke to prove him wrong by doing something to get Julie’s attention so Reggie isn’t mad. Neither is Alex but he doesn’t like being told how or WHEN to ghost) Luke doesn’t even give his bandmates a warning eyebrow quirk, a hand signal, nothing. Reggie turns to Alex like ‘dude what is he DOING?’ And before he can even really convey that, they go *POOF*

This man had a plan and he was gonna do it, so he did. Whether it’s the power of love, they stopped performing, or Reggie and Alex actually poofed out, the odds worked in Luke’s favor so he and Julie could have a super special moment, a moment special enough to make an actual living person (Nick) wonder if a “hologram” has a better chance at connecting with Julie than he does.

Again, regardless of who made them poof or how they poofed, they mf poofed so Luke’s a happy hamster. (Idk it just sounded fitting instead of happy camper lol wait what if someone had 3 pet hamsters and named them alex reggie and luke🥺 someone buy some hamsters and let me be their godmother or their aunt and i’ll love them from afar.) Anyway, Luke’s thriving, flourishing, his crops are going to grow in time for the harvest.

You can see Julie lean back as she turns to see Luke. It’s... almost as if... She. Wasn’t. Expecting. Him. To. Be. There..??

Honey badger Luke bc he DGAF <|:) Bitch, it’s Luke mf Patterson and he’s gonna,, GET! IN! YOUR! FAAAACE!!!

You CANNOT tell me he’s not doing the absolute MOST to try and seduce Miss Juliana Mariposa Rose Molina.

Yes I’m making a headcanon that Julie has TWO middle names and that one of them is the spanish word for butterfly and that the other is her mother’s name. Also yes, I believe (i believe that we’re just one dream away from who we’re– oh, that’s not what we’re doing? okay, sorry!) that Juliana is Julie’s full name.

In this house we love and respect Juliana Mariposa (Dahlia)** Rose Molina

**I’m just putting Dahlia there for fun bc I can. :) Whether I’d consider it a possible middle name of hers depends. Anyway I just thought it was a cute thing to add bc it goes along with the other middle names I gave her *^_^* Also, I feel like I made a post giving a bunch of the characters middle names lemme see if I can find it later)

Ok i’m done this took me basically all day from like 10am until 4:08. I obviously took breaks in between, but not long ones...😶

[kangtaebins]

I have something important to say:

For @hueningkai (but you all shall read as you wish)

I made this blog in January 2021. Although I had been on tumblr for years, I was persuaded by my best friend to make a writing acc. I was still recovering from many things and just needed an escape. Now, I knew it was cringe but I never really thought anyone would read anything. I was simply projecting what I wished I had. I was writing soft scenarios, to make up for the lack of love I had for myself. I was grasping at anything that would fill me with some type of joy even for a short period of time.

I had been following you for a while, since before this blog even existed. I enjoyed seeing your content, as I was in my Beomgyu era (lmao).

It was all fine and dandy until I made that one Beomgyu Kidcore themed moodboard. You followed me upon seeing it. My first mutual! I was happy! It felt nice having an interaction in a space I felt safe in.

This blog was/is a space for me to be my most exaggerated self. To say the things I don’t normally say bc I wouldn’t want anyone to take me seriously if I say smth cringe. Y’all don’t bat an eye, bc it’s just- normal idk.

We began sending each other asks surrounding each other’s posts, and eventually after becoming comfortable it started turning flirty?

But the thing is, we were both well aware it was all in fun. It was a running joke between us on who would fall first (to which,,, you lost :)).

You messaged me for the first time on March 16th, the day after my birthday. I wasn’t feeling great at the time, and you were there for me. Granted, I didn’t want to trauma dump on you- so I kept it brief. Regardless, you made it clear that you were there for me if I needed someone.

After that conversation, we proceeded to message each other every single day (all day even). The flirty energy didn’t stop in the asks,, it continued into dms. At that point, I started to hesitate a little. I even remember messaging my best friend and talking about it and saying I was a little taken aback. Not because I felt uncomfortable, but because I felt a little too comfortable. You seemed to have a calming quality that- despite the boldness of your “fake” flirting, made me feel light. I was just enjoying the company.

And then I started getting to know you, I learned that you work with children and it made me smile :) It’s a rather attractive quality to me, as my main goal in life is to be a parent. It was nice that there was someone else like me that didn’t hate kids for no reason. I also noticed many other similarities between us, and just how many qualities we share.

Over time, something started feeling different. The energy shifted into this big elephant in the room. The “fake” flirting started feeling less fake, and the way my mood brightened and the way I smiled every single time I got a notification from you concerned me. I was unsure of the way I felt towards you, as I always felt fear when liking someone in the past. These things have never went well for me previously. Because of that, I got nervous and started reading into everything you said as if trying to analyze your intentions and figure out if you were being serious or if we were still just joking around.

It was March 28th when I decided to stop being a coward and just- ask you.

The nerves set in even more after your admission. The thing was, my brain knew I felt the same way. I was just scared of admitting it. I had never been in a situation in which someone I was interested in felt the same interest towards me (I know it’s shocking,, I’m just so hot who wouldn’t like me back /lh). I was nervous that I’d fuck it up. That I would say something and you’d take it back. I was scared of letting myself admit the butterflies I felt when you told me good morning, and the way my cheeks got warm when you complimented me. You were just so sweet, I didn’t know what to do.

So I went with it. I told myself that the worst that could happen is you change your mind and I’d get over it in a week or two. Nothing I hadn’t went through before. I figured, whats the harm in allowing myself to enjoy something that made me feel good? Why would I run away from someone that had been nothing but kind to me and had never made me feel uncomfortable. Not once have you ever made me feel anything but at peace. You made me feel seen. I felt like I could be my true self around you. I felt that you wouldn’t judge me no matter what.

So I continued to talk to you even more over that next week. I let myself sink into that gushy feeling for the first time.

It was April 4th when I decided you know what, I want to date this person. I don’t want to wait for the possibility of either you asking me or you finding someone you like more than me (bc- I’m selfish). Once again I thought, the worst that could happen is you say no. And what better way to ask than to throw in a meme in the middle of a flirting session. Why not right? Why make it awkward and serious when it doesn’t have to be?

And I was pleasantly surprised at your response

In hindsight, I don’t know why I was so surprised. You literally told me you love me way before that. Granted, I just figured it was part of the flirty thing- I was completely unaware of how these things work. Hell, I’m still unaware of how these things work.

Nonetheless, it started to sink in. You wanted to be with me? Little ol’ me?

From that day, the butterflies didn’t stop. They kept coming (and still do now and then ngl). I began to take notice of everything about you. At some points its like I was searching for any possible red flags so I could validate my nerves. In the end, I came up with nothing (aside from you not liking chicken nuggets,, that’s still off putting to me /j). Its like every time I thought I couldn’t like you more, you proved me wrong.

It took me a minute to tell you I love you. I honestly didn’t know what love felt like. I was under the impression that it was like the movies. The way they portray it like fireworks and rainbows and what have you. It wasn’t until I realized that thats not realistic that I was able to take a look back. Love isn’t like the fairytales. Love is safety. Love is comfort. Love is knowing this person has my back. Love is not having to question the way the other feels bc of their words and actions. You showed me what love is. You showed me what it means to trust someone with your heart.

A piece of my heart is with you all the time, and I know for certain that you keep it safe. I’m positive that you would never intentionally harm it. I have more trust in you than I’ve ever had in anyone. I believe you when you tell me you love me (10 times a day :)) because you don’t just tell me, you show me.

You put up with my bullshit so much. My mood changes, my annoying rambles late at night about whatever my brain decides to fixate on, my clinginess daily. You never make me feel bad for being overly excited about things I enjoy. You would let me go on for hours if I wanted to. You call me pretty even when my eyebrows look like nubs and my hair is funky. Need I go on? Yes.

The fact that I sent you my favorite hoodie speaks volumes,, tbh I still miss it <//3 but it looks much cuter on you. (It also helps that you sent me yours to fill the void of missing mine hjsjekk)

Your voice makes me feel like I’m floating. Your laugh makes my heart spin. Your smile is contagious, love.

You’re my soulmate.

We have many soulmates in life, some romantic, some platonic. But you?? You’re my person, Ryu. You’re the reason I smile at my phone at work. You’re the reason I bust my ass everyday. You’re the reason I have so many future plans. You’re not just my first love, you’re my last love as well. There is no one else. I adore you in all the mushy gushy cringey ways possible and normally I’d be embarrassed to admit that. But today? I don’t care.

The sun to my moon, my angel, I love you. Happy Anniversary <3 Here’s to many more years to come (and eventually ones spent in person so I can finally hold you and never let you go)❤️

Mwah!

Ps. In order to express my love for you even more, I’m sharing my playlist for you with the dash :) You have it already, but the people must see how important you are to me in every way possible.

To the people reading this,, they say there’s many fish in the sea- you will find yours if you haven’t already. They’ll come when you least expect it,, except this fish- this one is mine <3

[deanwasalwaysbi]

This post from @crookedcryptid suggesting Dean and Castiel were canonically together from Dean's prayer confession on put a big stupid grin on my face, and then I went off and analyzed every episode that came afterward. So here you go?

Castiel’s in about every other episode from that point. And they are actually separated in the majority of the majority of the episodes, but the way they interact is just loving.

Episode by episode analysis under the cut. 

At The Trap, Dean confesses to Castiel in his prayer how he really feels (but not like that at least not in Chuck's censured version that we see) while Eileen and Sam split up bc of Chuck. It's late revealed that Chuck sent Sam Eileen and Sent Cas & Dean to Purgatory so they'd lose hope. (Cas must have defied Chuck's plan yet again by stopping Dean from voicing his feelings bc that's the only explanation I have to make this make any sense. (x) )

After Dean's confession, the next episode immediately separates Cas & Dean but Dean pines after the domestic life like Garth has with his family, an alternative lifestyle Dean once saw as unacceptably evil. (x)

But then next episode Castiel goes and finds Jack and brings him home. Brings him home to Dean who does this. (See gif above that lives rent free in my mind /\)

He holds Jack’s face just like he did Ben’s.  He looks into Jack’s eyes, one then the other, as if to verify that it’s really him. Then he looks from Jack to Castiel.

This dad moment. This neck hold and look to Castiel that simultaneously says, “you brought my son home to me” but also screams in Jensen’s headcanon that Dean used to look at Jack and see Lucifer but now he looks at him and sees Cas. 

(Tho that shouldn’t be hard since they clearly cast their combined biological child.)

I’m obsessed with it. It haunt my dreams and inhabits my waking brain.

The fact that this is not before ‘The Trap’ but after is so important. They didn’t set it right between them artificially, by Cas bringing Jack home. Instead, they set it right between them and then they got their son back.  Otherwise, it is the last piece of the puzzle to patch their relationship.  Dean was envious of Garth’s family, and suddenly Dean has his back.

In Galaxy Brain Chuck’s screen shows a view of Dean and Cas sitting super closely huddled together at the kitchen table. (x) Is actually from an earlier episode. There’s also the dadliest dadstiel moment ever, with Castiel letting his god killing, resurrected, super powered, three-year-old win at connect four, which was not in the script, but added by Misha and Sp8. (x)  When Sam and Cas disagree on Jack, Cas backs up Jack and Dean supports Cas over Sam.  The husbands share a whiskey while reveling in how they brought Jack up right,  “I knew it, Dean. When I was with Jack’s mother, she… You know, Kelly just had faith that Jack would be good for the world, and I felt it, too. I knew it. And then, when everything went wrong, and God took him from us… I was lost in a way I’ve never been before. Because I knew the story wasn’t over. I knew Jack wasn’t done. And I was right.” (Even if Dean’s a little too excited about using Jack as a weapon.) (Maybe this line explains what's been up with the Hellers these past 6 months yall.)

This is huge, because Dean was destroyed at the end of last season, imo, bc his idea of Jack was destroyed and he felt the need to cut himself off from all thoughts that he could have that family.  (x)

Cas also wordlessly goes into Dean’s backpack in a moment of routine casual intimacy.

Destiny’s Child & Dean calling Cas an idiot for risking his life yet again- not knowing that Cas felt secure in the knowledge that he wouldn't die bc of his deal. Dean was legit scared to lose him again. (oh no my heart). With that extra knowledge Cas had it's exactly the kind of thing Dean would do. Dean's done this exact thing before both when he was, and was not, suicidal. (S13, S6) They get Jack’s soul back, but first the classic “oh no my child has ingested something”.

Last Holiday- No Cas. 😒

Gimme Shelter - Our boys are separated yet again - Castiel talks to Paster Sexy (recast doctor sexy) who says it’s okay to be gay. We get a lot of charming Cas with Jack moments. Something happens in this episode, it happens off-screen and it's something we've basically have never seen in this series. Jack tells Castiel that he expects to die to defeat Chuck and rather than fall into the pattern we've seen every single season, Castiel immediately tells Dean what is going on, immediately tells Dean everything he needs to know to protect Jack.

Drag me Away From You (ugh oh no and they will) - No Cas

Unity - end of the warm wuvy dov. 

Dean lets Jack think he isn’t family.  Sam discovers that if they let Jack kill Chuck that Billie will kill Eileen, anyone from another dimension or resurrected and Dean. Looks. At. Cas. (x) The fear in his eyes. 

By this point Dean is unhinged. He’s back to the beginning of the season when he was afraid that all of this was Chuck’s control rather than a real relationship between them. This should have been an ‘absolution’ moment for Jack, the one Castiel says here that Jack doesn’t need from anyone but himself. The closest we get to confirmation that Cas has learned that lesson himself. (x) Dean was so destroyed after his idea of Jack died that it split up his marriage …  I mean….  Dean already chose Jack’s life once, even after Mary.  Dean is choosing him over using him as a weapon to kill Chuck is huge considering how spun out Dean was by this point.  I’m convinced that without Cas being there Dean would not have stopped, and might have let Jack sacrifice himself, might have shot Sam giving Chuck his ending.

I’m also convinced that Chuck designed The Trap to have Cas die 8 episodes ago. (x) That Dean was never supposed to have this post trap period with him.  So that he would be hopeless just like he was in episode 19.  That was in the version Chuck wrote back in episode 4. Without Cas, Chuck would have gotten his ending. (x) Woof there is a sentence that hurts in 15x20

18 - skipping this winchester main pain for the mo-

So this all got me thinking about Dean’s face after Cas says he loves him, the little choked up headshake, like maybe that’s just verbal confirmation of something he, on some level, already knew. (x)

I haven’t hit 15 in my rewatch yet and I’m sure I will find new a different things to piss me tf off when I do. 

Morning erybody?

[okaybutlikeimagine]

Come Inside, It’s Ok

Desc: Hop realizes that Billy is a lot like him when he was a teen- based on the song Thirteen by Big Star (bc that’s a Jopper AND a Harringrove anthem, tell me i’m wrong)

TW: referenced past child abuse, referenced homophobia, every dad in Hawkins sounds like an abusive asshole in this fic i didn’t mean it 😞

you can also read this on AO3 right here!! ♥

~*~

James Hopper hated his father more than anyone else hated the man. More than his uncle who had to grow up with the jerk. More than his mother who threatened to divorce the deadbeat seven times. More than anyone.

Hopper’s father was abrasive and loud. He joined the army because he wanted to. He gave up his individuality willingly. He shaved his head and licked the boot of The Man and acted superior for it. He looked down on a young Jimmy Hopper and barked in his face and ordered that he become a man. Quicker. Jim was only 7. He had just broken an arm at football practice. He needed reassurance and comfort. He got condescension and a mother threatening to leave. Loudly.

James Hopper was sure he was the only son in the world who hated his own father. He felt sure as hell about it when he stuck his jaw out and looked past his nose at his father who always seemed to tower over him. Even when the man only had an inch on him, he was larger- always looming. He felt sure as hell about it when he’d narrow his eyes and refuse to listen. He felt sure as hell about it when he talked back to him, and got into yelling matches with him, and slammed the door on him.

He felt even more sure the one night he got hit.

He was more than certain he was the only one. Standing there, staring this horrible bulk of a man down, Jimmy knew no one else had ever felt such a thing before. This wasn’t TV or the movies. This wasn’t a family love you cherish by the fire on a cold Christmas night. This wasn’t a father with kind eyes and a stern voice who comes into the house in the evening with his suit on and his briefcase in hand, kissing his kids and smiling brightly. This was different and he knew it.

And all of that anger and stress and feeling of certainty made him take too long to realize something crucial. Because he didn’t realize you can know something and yet still be so wrong.

That is, until Phil didn’t come to school one day.

Jimmy figured he was sick. A couple days later he figured it was that nasty stomach bug. A week later and he figured his family took a trip. A week and a few days had him itching with worry. He asked his best friend as calmly as he could. That friend looked at him like he was nuts.

“You didn’t hear?”

“Hear what?”

“He moved away. His mom took him out of the state last weekend. They just left.”

Jim couldn’t understand the words for a second.

“Why?”

“You didn’t know? His dad has been roughing him up for years now. He got the mom too, I think. Why do you think he was always wearing sweaters all year long?”

Jim’s heart stopped.

“His mom finally got him out. They left.”

“Why did no one say anything about it?”

“Because you don’t talk about that stuff.” Jim’s friend said, hushed and knowing, eyes turned solemn and hiding a world Jim didn’t know lived in there. In his most outspoken, lively friend. In his friend he’d known since they were toddlers.

You don’t talk about that stuff he said like he had a whole world of pain to tell. Jim knew his friends were like him- dads who were tough as nails and grunted more than spoke. It was why they all got along so well. But they never mentioned their fathers being… Jim was so sure he was the only one. Everyone else did things with their family. Everyone else seemed so perfect. At the very least they seemed better. Jim was sure.

Why did no one say anything about it? quickly morphed into Why did I never even ask?

Starting there, Jim kept a critical eye out. He watched his friends and what they were wearing. The way they moved and the changes in those movements. The words they spoke about their parents. He noticed differences and fluctuating emotions. But stil, he was only a young teenager- he never knew what to do. His mouth couldn’t form around the words he felt he should say. His brain could barely provide them. So he did for them what he would have liked- just took them out to empty fields and deep into the woods. He provided them beer and music. Sometimes, when they were splitting at the seams, he’d fight them a bit. He’d egg them on so they could fight it out. Get the anger out. Help, somehow. Inadvertently. Lord knew Jimmy sometimes just needed to punch shit. Turns out, his friends felt the same way, and often.

When his daughter Sarah came, he handled her gently and spoke to her even softer. He got into fights with his now ex-wife over his not being strict enough but Hop couldn’t find it in himself to have any kind of gruffness toward someone so soft and so innocent and so pure. She was the light of his life. She left so quickly. Even his softness and kindness couldn’t save her, and he couldn’t very well beat the shit out of her enemies like he had wished to.

And when he met Billy Hargrove on the side of the road that one dark night, having pulled him over for speeding drunkenly down the lonely streets on the outskirts of town, every red flag flew up. Every worry and fear he found within himself when he was a teen found its place once again inside of him for this boy. For his bruised face and exhausted eyes. For his lightly cut chin and short breath. Hop became young Jimmy yet again, analyzing and fearing for a world of pain he couldn’t see and couldn’t ask about. He searched hard for words this time and found all the wrong ones. He exhausted the poor boy with his inability to articulate his fears and was successful in taking him in only because he had worn him out so badly.

Still, since then, he’s been here. He’s family now. He’s out of there. In all his fumbling Hop did something right.

And yet, things still feel wrong. Billy still walks tentatively around him, like the cabin is going to crash down above him and any relationship they’ve built up is going to shatter.

Hop thinks about it so often. He thinks about Billy and sees his own friends from high school. He sees parts of himself, but sadder, angrier… more helpless. He thinks endlessly on what he can do to fix it.

~Won’t you let me walk you home from school~

A song starts playing through his record player and he’s lost again in the world of Jimmy vs. Billy. He thinks of how life used to feel simple.

This song always whisks him away to high school. The early days when life was confused and wandering and he was just coming into his own with football, not nearly a “star” yet and Joyce… Joyce was young and wide eyed and wandering just the same. By that point she hadn’t even met Lonnie yet. She was awkward and yet still so beautiful. So quiet and so stunning. Her laughter rang through the hallways and he swears he can still hear it.

This song feels like it’s for them. When he first heard it, he saw her face back when they were freshmen and then sophomores, when he used to walk her home. He always used to walk her home, before he got his car and before she got Lonnie. They’d walk so slow, wandering through the streets, lazily strolling past stores and getting slightly distracted by the people zooming past on their bikes.

He sits forward on the couch and he looks down at the tattered carpet and he hears himself as Jimmy.

”C’mon Joyce… we can hit the pool this weekend.”

“I’m busy.”

“Then… then maybe Friday I can get a couple tickets for that dance.”

“What?”

He gave her his biggest, brightest grin, knowing he caught her off guard. He smiles a little now at the thought.

”Yeah, c’mon, Joyce. I’ll take ya. I’ll get a monkey suit and you can wear a dress-”

She had laughed that bright, ringing laugh. It made him smile every time.

“Yeah, I think I’ll pass.”

“You’re gonna pass up a chance to dance with me?”

“Don’t tell me, you’re the best dancer in Hawkins?”

“You’ll never know if you don’t come find out.”

“You’re really full of yourself, aren’t you?”

Hop has a hard time thinking of himself back then. He felt so sure of everything. Of himself and what he was doing, even if he knew he didn’t know anything at all. Still, he chuckles now as he sits here, thinking about Joyce’s smile and her little nod. Thinking about him buying those tickets. Thinking about the night they had together, awkward and fumbling but bright still. His first real kiss that had real feelings to go along with it. The way Joyce walked so quickly as they headed to her home because she was so nervous. The way she never let him walk her up to her house because she was so scared her parents would ground her.

Lord does he remember the fights. The stress and the struggle of dealing with Joyce’s parents. When they came to an after-school event and Jimmy said hi to her and her dad gave her hell for it and her mom worried herself sick for a bit. She got grounded and started avoiding him. He got angry and figured fine because Gloria from his History class had been eyeing him up lately and helping him with a pretty friendly smile so it didn’t even matter.

It wasn’t more than a week that had passed before he cornered her after school and convinced her to let him walk her home again.

They wandered downtown and he guided her behind a store building, the store she now works for if he remembers correctly, and asked about that night. Asked about what he said wrong. Asked about what he did wrong.

She shook her head, said it was just her parents being “crazy, I don’t know”. He couldn’t find it in him to worry that much. When they kissed, it was still with so many feelings attached. Hop can’t remember when those feelings faded.

It wasn’t until a couple years later when a rumor started going around about Joyce’s dad being a grade A asshole like Phil’s was all those years ago that made Jim take her aside very seriously and ask her if she was okay- those couple of years ago and that day. By that point she was with Lonnie and he was getting serious about Diane. He and Joyce hadn’t talked for over a year. Still, he was worried. She insisted that her dad just liked to huff and puff and yell enough to shake her ears, but he never touched her. It wasn’t until years and years later that Hop realized that really isn’t any better. Nowadays she insists she was and is fine and he’s just found it in himself to believe her.

When Hop finally got a car, they would sit in it and listen to the radio and talk music. She was the only person who’d sit with him and actually think about lyrics and feelings and words. She was always so headstrong about… well everything but especially human rights. She wanted equal rights for everyone. She fought so hard it made Jim tired. Maybe it started with her father but it truly never seemed to end. They used to sit and theorize about meanings behind words and the messages of songs.

”Tell your old man what we say about Paint It, Black. That’ll mess him up.”

Joyce hit him with a chuckle. That was the last time in high school they really laughed together. He can still remember her laugh back then- light and free from any weight these years have brought to it.

But now Jimmy is Hopper, and life isn’t the same. It doesn’t wander and linger and hide behind stores for extra kisses that feel electric. He knows life just doesn’t work that way anymore. He feels like life has only continued with all of the bad parts and none of the good.

In the slow guitar interlude of the song, he hears voices where they shouldn’t be- distant and slightly muffled and outside the window that’s opened a bit to let some air in.

“Yeah, he’s home. The cruiser is there.”

“Then I should go-”

“No, wait-”

It’s Billy and another voice Hop thinks he can recognize. Sounds like the same cocky, lilted tone of Steve Harrington. He knows they’ve been fighting for months now. They always seem to be fighting. Hop used to get called into the school because Billy was always shoving him around that one year. Since then there’s been whispers of them causing a ruckus all over the place but Hop never gets called to check it out. He doesn’t like to ask too much about it. He’s still trying to handle Billy gently and there’s so many more things to worry about. He doesn’t have the words to ask about that.

He doesn’t have the words to explain why they’d be here, together and clearly not at each other’s throats. Why bring a fight all the way back home?

“You uh… got anything planned this weekend?”

“Nope, nothing planned.”

A pause.

“There’s uh… a stupid dance or something-”

“Billy-”

“Look I just… we can’t go, obviously but maybe… we can do something on our own?”

There’s another pause. Longer this time. Hop used to be so sure and suddenly he’s realizing yet again maybe things are the same as they were when he was young- because yet again, he doesn’t know anything.

~Won’t you tell me what you’re thinking of~

“C’mon Harrington….” there’s the confirmation Hop didn’t need. “Say something at least. Don’t just stand there thinking.”

“Billy we can’t keep running around and hiding.”

“Why not?”

~Would you be an outlaw for my love?~

“What if people find out, that’s why not! What if my dad-”

“Tell your dad to fuck off.”

“And Hop?”

Hop’s heart stops. Everything comes crashing to a halt because suddenly he’s being made to face the very harsh fact that he’s not Jimmy anymore. He hasn’t been for a long while. He’s Chief Hopper and Chief Hopper belongs to the “other” part of these young kids’ minds. Billy’s and Steve’s and El’s and Mike’s. He’s the man they’re meant to rebel against. He’s the one that doesn’t “get it” like they do.

And apparently he’s the one that Steve is worried about.

He doesn’t blame him. He doesn’t even know what to think. He knows people like that exist. He thinks he used to go to school with a few guys who were… well, into other things. He never had much to say or even think about it. Joyce was friends with them. She went out to a protest or something once in their senior year. He saw her in a car with them while he was taking Diane to the movies.

It’s not the fact that they like each other or that they want to spend time together. That’s better than them beating the snot out of each other and getting his guys called on them. It’s the fact that they’re worried about him and the fact that they have every reason to be. Hop is part of “The Man” now, and people around here don’t exactly like differences.

“I’ll figure it out.” Billy says, but Hop almost misses it, it’s so quiet.

“Billy-”

“Are you gonna fight for this, or what? Or is this just a one time thing for you to find yourself or some bullshit?”

Hop hears Jimmy in Billy’s words

”Are you not gonna fight for me?”

“Fight for you?!” Joyce had yelled. Oh, how she yelled. ”Are you serious? I… I pick and choose my fights Jim, okay? I have to.”

“That’s not very fair to me.”

“Not fair? No shit it’s not fair, it’s not fair for me either! And you… you’re not being fair to me, y’know!”

And that was it. They went separate ways. It’s so vivid in Jim’s mind- the way she stormed away and Jim drove himself home. He doesn’t remember how long it took until Lonnie joined Joyce’s picture, but it felt too soon in Hop’s ever bitter mind. He couldn’t look at her for weeks. He shoved Lonnie in the hallway any chance he got. The kid would snarl and sneer at him, but he was as scrappy as a dog and scrawnier than a toothpick- no way did he ever pick a fight. He spat words and Jimmy lunged and that was that. Hop doesn’t remember when the feelings faded, but he knows he never stopped hating Lonnie’s stupid face.

Then he started to date Diane and things were just… over.

“Alright Steve, I see-”

“It’s not that easy for me, Billy.”

“And you think this shit is easy for me?”

Hop feels bad for sitting here, still listening, but he can’t get his muscles or limbs to move him. He feels stuck, somewhere between here and the past, picturing all the ways he’s still the same and yet so wildly different.

“Well it is different for you.”

“Just because my shit’s different doesn’t mean my shit’s better. Shit is still shit, Steve.”

All the times Hop thought he had it the worst anyone could ever possibly have it.

“You don’t know what it’s like.”

“Try me, Harrington! Just try me.”

All the times Hop thought maybe his friends were exaggerating about Phil’s past. Maybe Joyce was being dramatic about things at home. There was no way a kid could feel so threatened. Not a kid as big as Phil. Not a kid as headstrong as Joyce.

There’s a longer pause from the two outside the window. The voice that comes is quieter now.

“It’s scary Billy.”

“I know it is! I… fuck I know it is.”

Not a kid as big and headstrong as Billy. It took years for Hop to believe it could happen and still, with an example living in his own house, it’s still hard to understand.

“Don’t you think it could be worth it?” That’s Billy’s voice. Hop feels his heart sink even deeper. They’re talking like they’re going to die if they’re caught. How many more times can he tell this boy he’s safe here? What does he have to do to convince him? To convince them both?

“Maybe… I think so.”

“Look, I can’t make you do anything, Steve. But if you wanna try… then let me know, alright?”

Billy sounds so tired. Hop wants to tell him to lay down and take a nap. There’s such a long pause that follows and fills the space between them.

And then suddenly there’s something blocking the sun from the window. Jim gets the wherewithal to turn and see that the two boys have got their hands tangled in the front of each other’s shirts, just like they would if they were gearing for a fight, but instead of fists flying it’s their lips locked- worlds of frustration still heavy on their brows.

Jim wants to protect these kids until the day he dies. They’re here and they’re wandering too, but their walk home is covered in speed bumps and potholes and hell maybe even spikes that he and Joyce never knew. Whatever he can do to give these kids the time and place to wander like the kids they are, he’ll do it.

Then they separate, their breathing clearly labored and mingling. Then they turn and see Jim in the window, caught like two deer in big bright headlights.

A split second later, Steve is running for the hills and Billy is left with his fists grasping at the air. Hop can’t help but laugh.

[koushisatori]

Surprise

kuroo x f!reader

genre: birthday fluff

warnings: none

word count: 2.3k

note: I made it !! Happy Birthday to you, Kuroo ! <3 - Also I’ll beta it later when i’m home from university, bc it’s 3 am here, oops x.x

Kuroo wasn’t jealous, really because logically there was no reason to be

You were his girlfriend and you did not mind sudden Hollywood blockbuster worthy kisses when he got a spurt of…possessiveness towards you

He is in no way overbearing or anything, both of you share the opinion that even though you’re a couple you don’t have to be together all the time, spend afternoons with your friends

Then again, you two spend quite a lot of time together, with you being the  Volleyball Clubs manager, always staying behind with your team when they practiced way past the official clubs' training's hours

But sometimes he woke up and felt the need to have you all to himself

On those days a slightly lingering gaze by other would irk him enough to    permanently glue himself to your side or back

Because of the rareness of that situation, you generally give into that specific mood and take him either with you if you had plans or adapt to whatever your handsome boyfriend seemed fit

(usually, it consists of getting snacks from the store to make watching movies more fun after you both finished your homework. And also cuddles. Lots and lots and lots of cuddling and kisses.)

Anyway, normally he’s a super laid back, relaxed, and ‘’the best boyfriend in the world, right, baby?’’

Kuroo was happy with being ‘’a bit (big times) nerdy’’ as kenma liked to remark, liked that things had their reasons and were logically intelligible

Well…he quickly realized that, while emotions were chemically explainable this also was as far as logic was helpful with them

Sooo…there was no reasonable excuse for him to feel that ugly burning in his chest watching you ruffle through Lev’s hair and giggle so cutely

But it was his birthday, and you should be all over HIM because HE was YOUR boyfriend and in general, maybe he had one of those not so great days bc not only did he get stuck in his bedsheets and face planted to the ground first thing in the morning but his breakfast toast also landed with its face on the kitchen floor just after he put away all the things he used

You were…not avoiding him but kind of distant with your thoughts

At lunch, he was telling you something you’d usually find at least funny if not hilarious because your humor was so fantastically similar to his, but all you did was smile lightly

You even whispered with Yaku instead of talking to him !! how dare you

Rest in peace, Kuroo (you will survive one day with a bit less attention of your s/o)

He wasn’t jealous of Lev or thought that you suddenly developed feelings for the younger boy

He was jealous because that tall child hoarded all of your attention, while you had looked at him maybe twice, three times tops, in the last hour

‘’Kuroo.’’ To the untrained ear the small setters voice as passive as usual. Kuroo though is able to easily distinguish the various different layers of Kozume Kenma’s very real, emotional bandwidth. The captain did hear Kenma and his questioning as well as slightly worried tone, he simply chooses to not react in favor of shooting (barely) decently hidden death glares at the to-tall-for-his-own-good-boy. 

‘’Kuroo.’’ The slight change in his childhood friend's voice was enough for the black-haired player to grudgingly turn away from you and Lev to look at Kenma.

‘’Yes.’’ Tetsurou huffs out, giving his best to not sound like a petulant child. ‘’You’re so dumb.’’ Kenma said dryly, definitely analyzing him. The questioning sound leaving Kuroo was close to embarrassing, a quick cough and back straightening later, he adds ‘’You wound me. Right here.’’ While pressing his hand flat against his chest. ‘’Where’s my understanding childhood friend to put balm on my hurting heart by sharing emotionally charged, empathic words with me?’’

Instead of offering the desired words, the smaller boy rolls his eyes before he averts them to his hand-held gaming console. ’’Can you put that thing away, we’re at practice Kenma.’’ Kuroo all but unintentionally whined. 

Everything was stressing him out today. Usually, his childhood friend at least stuck to the general rule of not using it outside the breaks. But obviously, there was a plot against him going on with the goal to annoy him more than usual because, of course, why not doing it on his damn birthday. Nice friends and their nice presents.

Just like Kuroo did mere minutes before, Kenma decided to simply…ignore his request half voiced as some kind of instruction. Well…things didn’t work like they were supposed to, he didn’t feel like arguing with his friend so he let him be for now. Rather than that, he turned back to you and Lev, who – for once – seemed eager to train his digging and passing game because you threw the volleyball for him to dive after.

‘’Where in freaking hell is Yaku…’’ Kuroo muttered grumpily, before repeating louder ‘’Yaku! Why am I the only third…Noboyuki!’’These definitely aren’t my friends, he thought while finally giving in to his deepest desire of ripping you away from the grey-haired future wannabe ace. 

‘’You truly are dense when it comes to (Y/N),’’ Kenma says, moving away towards the benches, before swerving around them to leave for the clubroom. ‘’The definition of tunnel vision.’’

The thing is, Kuroo heard Kenma say it, but his brain refused to acknowledge them, too focused on finally being in the spotlight of your focus.

 Meanwhile, you were watching your dark-haired boyfriend closer than he realized. You carried the whole plan. Or rather your ability to make him lose focus on anything that isn’t you, with just the right amount of addressing the slight possessive side of his and deprivation of your attention.

Even though all of this was just so the others could fulfill their part of the plan, you hate how it led him to mope around the whole day. It was so hard to not laugh about his stupid science joke at lunch and overall, not tell him all day how glad you were that he was born. This is his special day, why wouldn’t you tell him how much you loved his presence and his annoyingly attractive smirk? If not for the others and them begging and bribing you, you would smooch his kissable cheeks, nose, forehead, and lips all day long to honor this special date.

You are an amazing and emphatic girlfriend, so…of course, you realize that his mood in general is rather on the bad side today. He wants you close and to himself, and you did the complete opposite! Tetsurou would absolutely give you an ear full later when he finally understood the whole plan.

Nonetheless, it is kind of cute how he tried to hide that he was sulking. Your big baby of a boyfriend was currently trying to kill poor Lev with his gaze alone, staring holes into the back of his head all the while directing puppy dog eyes at you to relent and come over.

Usually, your Tetsurou was the perfect team captain. Attentive, clever, strategical, and just the right amount of authoritarian and approachable. But with his mind stuck on questioning why you were being weird to him on his birthday, he had yet to realize that through the whole time of today’s practice all of his teammates inexplicably went missing for about 15 minutes before they either sneaked back in (the first years and some of the second years) or openly announced a little too detailed information on how, for example, the bathroom visit has been absolutely necessary and could not be postponed.

The only problem: Lev wasn’t allowed to know of the plan until a second beforehand to not accidentally spoil the surprise out of pure excitement to surprise his Kuroo-senpai.

When you see your better half starting to approach the two of you, yelling for his vice-captain and the libero simultaneously, you whisper ‘’Lev, when I say now, you have to start running okay and call for Yaku. Ask him to practice your receives as loud as you can, and take off over to the clubroom as fast as possible, alright? Also, please don’t fall, we don’t need a bloody and broken nose, Tetsu is pissed enough already. Please do it for me, okay?’’ It was a bit unfair of you to look at him hopefully like that, but as the team manager, you posessed a certain power none of the other third years had over the younger players.

Just a moment before Kuroo got the chance to grab the clueless middle blockers shirt collar, you voice out a hushed ‘’Now!’’. You immediately look up innocently to your boyfriend and finally put the warm smile on your lips that wanted to sit there since your eyes fell on him the first time this morning. ‘’Tetsu...is everything okay?’’ - ‘’Yaku-senpai, please help me with my receives!’’

‘’Lev never asks for receiving practice...’’ is…not the thing you wanted your boyfriend to say. Panicking that he might find out now, still a bit too early, you do the only thing that you know WILL take his mind off of it. You cup his cheek with your hands and pull him down to press your lips against his. 

His reaction was immediate, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you so close to him that not even a feather would fit between the two of you. Getting into the spontaneous moment, you happily loop your arms around his neck, smiling softly into the kiss. 

Yeah...you definitely had missed that.

When you break apart, he pecks your lips a few additional times for good measure before he bends down even more to bury his face in your neck, enjoying how your fingers softly stroke through and play with his hair, in all the right ways, helping him to relax for the first time in hours. ‘’Baby,…’’ he murmurs against your skin ‘’…no one is training the way they should, let’s just ditch practice. We get a cake from the bakery down the street and eat it in bed, okay?’’

For the second time today, you feel bad. Your boyfriend's voice sounds tired and that was not how a birthday boy was supposed to sound. With his face in your neck, you were able though to watch the entrance. They should come in any second now. You feel tempted to give into Tetsurou’s wishes.

Can they hurry up?! 

The thought desperately shoots through your head, because even though he was currently not paying attention to anything but recharging and breathing you in, Kuroo is way too perceptive to not get behind the ruckus going on in the gym the whole afternoon.

‘’We can cuddle later, Tetsu, I promise my whole afternoon is all for you. If you want I can even sleep over.’’ Your soothing words made his invisible cat ears prick up and listen interested. You knew that, from the moment you both enter the comfort of his home, he would drape himself over you for permanent, never-ending cuddles. The only reason for him to let go of you - unwillingly so - will be you whining about having to use the bathroom. For everything else, you would have to carry a (nearly) dead weight of the size and weight of your boyfriend everywhere.

‘’I haven’t heard Tora for a while now….’’ The raven-haired middle blocker mumbles, and your heart picks up some speed again.

Looking for words you stammer some intangible syllables, which lead Kuroo to look up, suspicion swirling in his hazel eyes. ‘’Baby…what’s wrong?’’ he asks, cocking his head to the side, watching you like a cat its prey. Quickly waving your hands in front of you, you hastily answer a ‘’Nothing.’’ And try to smile away the panic.

Before he got the chance to repeat his question and pry it out of you, the gym darkens, and you breathe out a sigh of relief. Just on time. With the door opening a little source of light illuminates his teammate's faces with his closest friends at the front. Yaku holding a cake stabbed with 18 sparklers, and Nobuyuki holding an unholy amount of the ugliest birthday ballons you had ever seen. All of them together slaughtering the happy birthday song in such a passionate manner, that you could see yourself being able to forgive them the torture they put you through in the near future. 

‘’Come one, birthday boy.’’ You say with a loving smile, and grab his hand to pull him to the rest of the group.

The moment the lights flicker back on and everyone is cheering out loud one last time. You realize belated that Kuroo (intended) and you (unintended) were besieged with confetti and glitter. (You, until this day, suspect Yamamoto who looked a bit too innocent for your taste.)

‘’All of that…for me?’’ Kuroo questions, his gorgeous eyes shining tell telling in the remaining light of the sparkles. Following his words, Kenma takes a small step forward quickly handing over a small book – filled with birthday wishes, pictures that were taken with each and all of them, inside jokes and doodles - just to move out of the spotlight again as quickly as he jumped into it. ‘’Surprise, Tetsu.’’ You say with a sweet smile, that makes him move closer to you to gift himself a taste of your lips.

Before things get to turn mushy and emotional, a chant of Cake! Cake! Cake! – started by Lev and Tora, joined by everyone, disrupts the moment the two of you had.

‘’Okay, okay! I hear the will of the people, I’ll submit to it!’’ Kuroo gives in laughing. ‘’But…’’ a theatrical moment of silence ‘’I want to cut the cake with (Y/N) together!’’ Your boyfriend proudly announces, and, to his delight, you blush furiously. Yakus laughing remark of ‘’Oi, Kuroo, this is not your wedding, you know!’’ was followed by various joking wolf whistles and some hollering. You didn’t know how you ended up being in the center of attention together with him, but when Tetsuro easily replies ’’Well, I need to perfect this skill it for the real ceremony after party one day.’’ You knew that you wouldn’t want to be somewhere else.

[kaminobiwan]

stargazing

pairing: obi-wan kenobi x jedi!reader

summary: Existential musings under the stars. Real Disney Princess moment here, folks. (Obi is the princess obviously)

a/n: The prompt demanded it be given to Padawan!Obi. I simply complied. Also, I sprinkled some of my astronomy knowledge in there, bc uni. Thank you AST 104.

This was part of my 175 follower celebration (still open), requested by the ever lovely @highcouncil! Please, for the love of all that is holy, do your Obi-Wan Kenobi-loving hearts a favor and read her amazing work. You’ll thank yourselves for it.

“That one’s the Burning Snake.”

Obi-Wan points to an ambiguous spot in the sky, his too-big robes flapping across his face. He shakes his arm, readjusting the folds, and gestures again.

“Sorry — that one.”

He hears you toss a snort over your shoulder, your back to his as you lean on each other to stay upright. Both of your necks are craned towards the constellations that dapple the ink-black backdrop blanketing Coruscant, and the night is soundless with the exception of your voices.

“Are you sure you’re remembering these right? I’m pretty sure you were reading that starmap upside-down earlier.”

“Was not,” he exclaims, though there is some truth to each of your statements. He’d quickly corrected the map before too long, and he was sure of his memorization after spending so much time in the archives. Positive.

You shift against him, seemingly placated, and he relaxes too, careful not to tug on the Padawan braid behind your ear. It’s predictably still sore after Quinlan had tangled your braids together in a practical joke only three hours ago, the two of you too engrossed in your readings to notice that the Force was being manipulated against you. It had taken fourteen minutes and half a jar of flounut butter to unravel the knots that had formed in the fray.

You gesture towards a star in the distance, and Obi-Wan follows your lead. “What’s that one, then?”

His answer comes immediately. “The Eye of the Pirate. At least make it a challenge for me.”

Your noise of lofty glee jolts him from his position, and he nearly falls flat on his back as you maneuver your body above him so that you’re face to face. Though from his point of view, you’re upside-down. “It was a trick question. The Eye of the Pirate is only visible from Corellia.”

He frowns, his hands moving to cushion his head. “No, it’s not. We can see it from here, too.”

You make an unpleasant face at him, but he thinks it’s rather cute from this angle. As soon as the thought passes through his brain, though, it’s gone. He shuffles away to hide his face from you, but you’re too close to escape.

“You’re wrong. Not every red star is the Eye of the Pirate, Obi!”

Truthfully — and it’s not just because he doesn’t want to admit he might be incorrect — he’s not sure if the star is in fact the one he claims it to be, or whether he’d mixed up Coruscant with Corellia in his studying. But he’s desperate to get out of your line of sight — even though it’s late into the evening, the moonlight pouring into the Temple garden illuminates the entirety of the landscape, and no doubt his embarrassment along with it.

Ever since you’d started to call him Obi, it was hard to handle being in close proximity to you. The physical reaction his blushing upper body always displayed was definitely not something Qui-Gon would be pleased by.

“Okay, maybe it’s not!” He retorts, and you tumble down next to him with a laugh. He blinks some of your hair out of his eyes, but doesn’t ask you to move away from the spot you’ve placed your head, snug into the juncture between his shoulder and neck. Much better.

“Enough with the quizzing, anyway.” Your murmur brings him back to the stars, and he has to remind himself not to turn his head to look at you. “Let’s just take it all in.”

“But you love quizzes.”

“Yes, when the real thing isn’t right there in front of us,” you tease, and Obi-Wan clamps his mouth shut once more. “It’s called stargazing. Not star-analyzing.”

“There is such a thing as — ”

“Shh!”

He fidgets in the grass, unsure of what to do in the silence next to you. As he connects the dots between the clusters of stars across the dark expanse, his memory supplies endless cascades of information and astronomic facts, filling his mental capacity to the point that —

“Obi-Wan.”

Your voice is hushed, as if you’ve just woken up from slumber, but he hears the slight command in your words. “Yes?”

“I can hear your thoughts from here.”

“Oh. Sorry.”

You lean up on your outside elbow, tilting towards him and tucking your hair behind your neck before it can prick the skin of his forehead. “Aren’t you the prodigy of meditation among your crèchemates? What’s wrong?”

Instead of meeting your eyes, Obi-Wan shrugs, and feigns a stretch. “Just having trouble, I guess.”

“You guess.” You echo, unconvinced, but lay back down regardless. “You’re worried about something.”

“I’m not worried, I’m restless. It doesn’t seem right to be stargazing if we’re not going to at least study them. We both have upcoming assignments, might I remind you.”

As if you could have forgotten. Your mission to Halcyon was all you’d been talking about the past week. Still, you’d gushed more over your excitement at hearing his stories than chronicling your own. Obi-Wan had promised to tell you all about the planet of Naboo upon his return to the Temple.

“You’re fretting over the trade dispute? I’m sure you’ll be able to handle the Federation representatives. Though I’ve read that Neimoidian workers regularly compete amongst themselves, and the winning team gets to eat the other — !” You catch the look he sends you out of the corner of your eye, and he allows himself a half-smile as you bashfully fall silent. “Sorry. Probably not what you want to hear right now.”

The apology wasn’t necessary. You both know it. But sometimes, he appreciates that you’d rather it still be said.

“I’m just…feeling unprepared. Luminara and Shaak Ti both faced the trials at my age, and I thought I’d be ready. But I can’t even tell if Qui-Gon thinks I am or not.” You’ve stilled beside him, but he feels you latching on to every word. “I don’t know.”

“You are ready,” you say simply.

“Yes, and if I am, then what?” He asks, to no one in particular. He knows the stars have as much a probability of knowing the future as you do. Maybe more, judging by how often Qui-Gon called to them in exasperation. “Everything changes. I can’t help but feel as though nothing will be the same, soon.”

You’re quiet for a moment, but then he hears what sounds like a chuckle from you. He raises a confused eyebrow, but doesn’t shift his body.

“Obi, of course everything will change. Nothing can stop that,” you say, reaching your fingers out and upwards. “Even the stars can’t prevent themselves from growing and dissipating. Eventually, they’ll all turn into nebulas, or supernovas, or black holes in violent implosions.” You trace an imaginary line across the air, drawing your own constellation, joining together specks that Obi-Wan imagines must be hundreds of parsecs apart. His eyes follow the pattern as you go. “You’re not a star.”

He blinks. “I’m not?”

Immediately, he wants to palm his face, because obviously he’s not a star, no matter how luminous Master Yoda professes him to be, but he just hadn’t known what you meant and now he’s gone and made himself sound like an idiot. But you continue, unfazed, as if you’d predicted he’d respond in kind.

“You’re not,” you repeat, and lower your hand down to your stomach. “You can choose what you become. You’re not born with a predestined fate. You have control.” Obi-Wan feels his body sink further into the ground, and some voice in the back of his head has the agency to surmise that you sound much wiser beyond your years right now. “What matters most is whether you take that control, or give it back to the universe.”

And now, he’s silent, because how in the name of the Force is he supposed to respond to that?

But you bound up again, high-spirited and bubbly and not nearly as prophetic as you had been a second earlier, and conclude, “At least, that’s what Master Koon says.”

He groans as you release a peal of laughter, and slumps further into the dirt. “Did you seriously just recite one of his lessons to me?”

“No! I made it much more interesting,” you clutch a hand to your chest in mock displeasure, and Obi-Wan crosses his arms. “I mean, I ad-libbed along the way, but I still meant what I said. I don’t think it’ll do you any good to worry.” As you speak, he lets his eyes unfocus towards the stars, white and yellow and blue diamonds alike blurring together in a disjointed mosaic. The tip of your nose rims the edge of his vision, and he exhales slowly with what feels like relief, though he isn’t completely sure. But you seem to be more at peace, too, and your voice even drops to a solemn resonance. “What you ask for tends to come and find you. Serenity, wisdom, trouble…”

“I’ve definitely heard him say that,” Obi-Wan muses, and he knows you’re hiding a grin next to him.

“It’s true,” you reply.

You both lay in the garden for several long moments more, until the voices of your masters can be heard calling your names.

Neither of you get up, despite it. A smile of his own creeps up his cheeks, and Obi-Wan knows you’re thinking exactly the same thing he is.

“Pretend we’re asleep so they’ll have to carry us back to the dorms?”

“Master Koon might break another arm, but yep. Worth it.”

“Worth it,” he agrees, and closes his eyes.

[solosatan]

lydia (mc) infosheet/overview

general info:

basically a self-insert with a different name bc i feel weird referring to myself in the third person

likes: horror movies, sci-fi, canadian whiskey, big dogs, death studies, dark clothes, classic rock

dislikes: unnecessary confrontation, background noises, obligation/responsibility, most sports

philosophy grad student whose thesis involves analyzing the death attitudes of different religious groups (this is my actual thesis please talk to me about it); signed up for the exchange program thinking it was essentially a study abroad course in christian religious studies and assumed it would be in like, rome or florence or somewhere else with a really long history wrt christianity (she’s very academically minded but desperately lacking in common sense/critical thinking)

arrival in the devildom was a massive shock especially having been raised to think that the bible/angels and demons were fictional, but once she realizes they aren’t going to like... kill and torture her, her academic brain takes over and she just wants to learn all about the metaphysics of this brand new world

very aloof + a bit blunt, pretty much unbothered by the fact that the brothers don’t really take to her right away and just figures it’ll give her more time to study/reassess her worldview. also not super concerned about the various dangers in the devildom since she naturally doesn’t have much self-preservation instinct and also assumes that diavolo isn’t going to let anything happen to her -- so she actually acts a lot more boldly than she would otherwise

relationships with the brothers (under the cut bc its LONG):

lucifer:

EXTREMELY WEIRD AND TUMULTUOUS RELATIONSHIP -- i think about their dynamic so much. lydia is the oldest of 5 so they both suffer from terminal eldest-sibling syndrome. they also have extremely similar aesthetic sensibilities, interests, and senses of humor to the point where i like to imagine the other brothers going back and forth between finding it uncomfortable and hilarious how similar they are. the problem with all of this is that they’re also both self-hating narcissists, so they resent these similarities and see each of their worst traits in each other while refusing to acknowledge those same traits in themselves.

at the same time that they’re similar, they’re also massively different in the ways their eldest-sibling syndrome manifests. lucifer is extremely authoritarian and -- although everyone’s reliance on him does stress him out -- to a certain extent he needs to feel needed. lydia, on the other hand, hates being needed and resents it when she feels like people are relying on her too much -- so she’s a lot more laid back as a result, which causes massive conflict between them (esp c. early s1) because lydia resents him for feeling like he has any authority over her.

ultimately, they do get really close but only in situations where lucifer is willing to let the facade drop and lighten the fuck up for a second -- working silently in the same room, going for drinks together, and running errands are really where their friendship is at peak healthiness. their relationship is also among the few that is entirely platonic on both sides from the jump -- they just have absolutely no romantic chemistry with each other lmfao

mammon:

takes them awhile to warm up to each other -- lydia tends to be very quiet when meeting people initially and finds mammon abrasive and annoying at first. when levi convinces them to make a pact with mammon she initially takes it pretty lightly, figuring like, demons make pacts all the time, whatever; but once the pact is made she realizes that it’s actually kind of a big deal and feels badly for manipulating mammon into one with her, so she starts to extend an olive branch.

once they do become friends, lydia reveals themselves to be just as capable of chaos as mammon is and lucifer regrets everything. mammon cracks her up and she just really loves hanging out with him. i think there might be a point where she considers a romantic relationship with him, but ultimately lets him down easy because she doesn’t want to risk their friendship for a romantic relationship that she doesn’t really feel is going to be successful long term (they’re still besties tho)

levi:

actually pretty fast friends! levi’s otaku supremecy spiels are shut down pretty quick after they reveal their cringe middle school years trump card. they reach an understanding (exchanging of anime recs) and can frequently be found binging shit or watching each other game.

overall their relationship is very mellow and comfortable. i like to think that they don’t come off as super close friends to everyone else, but trust each other a lot more than it initially seems. i think levi might nurse a baby crush on them for awhile but nothing ever really comes of it and it ultimately just kind of dies out.

satan:

slow burn but they’re literally in love. their relationship is relatively consistent with canon, although i don’t think they actually start dating until early season 2 and are just kind of circling each other at the end of season 1. as in canon, satan doesn’t really bother finding any common interests with them until the bodyswap arc, and lydia isn’t the type to put that effort in with someone who isn’t interested and gives him a bit of a wide berth because of his sin. once they find out their common interests in academia and murder mysteries, though, they might as well be joined at the hip. (i like to imagine this happens shoujo-style when they both get hyped about the murder on the train at the same time and lock eyes) by this point in time lydia is practically bursting at the seams with questions about demons/the three realms, but hasn’t really found anyone she feels comfortable asking -- so once she and satan click, she just kind of unloads on him and he’s more than happy to indulge. huge relationship milestone occurs when she asks him if he wants to read her thesis and he has to act like he hasn’t been obsessing over it since they told him the topic.

there are really only two massive roadblocks that delay them getting together -- lydia’s wariness at getting involved with the embodiment of wrath, and satan’s difficulty in overlooking the similarities she has with lucifer. with regard to the first, obviously no small part of them overcoming that is the slow building of trust between them, but really asmo should get credit as the one who finally pushed them over the edge there. he loves satan and he loves lydia, so he puts in far too many hours talking them through their feelings (not always gently). they send him a gift basket when it finally happens.

with regard to the second, the similarities lydia has with lucifer bother satan a lot when they first meet and start to get to know each other; but they ultimately wind up making him feel better about his own similarities with lucifer insofar as it helps him see those personality traits as something neutral, rather than intrinsically belonging to lucifer. and that gradual realization helps him to move past his identity issues re: lucifer (as well as several long debates on the nature of personal identity with lydia), and they start to get along better as a result. it also helps that lydia enjoys antagonizing lucifer on principle, so that helps him distance them mentally. but i do think the idea that lydia would rather be with lucifer and just sees him as a substitute would be a pretty big insecurity of his for awhile. he asks her about it at one point and she cries laughing and then has nightmares that night.

overall, they’re extremely into each other but extremely laid back as a couple. they’re both fine just doing their own things, so they spend quite a bit of time apart from day to day to the point where it takes everyone (-asmo) a hot second to figure out they’re actually dating. they’re affectionate in mostly subtle ways but if you look a little closer you’ll notice how close they’re sitting to each other and how their faces light up when they’re talking to each other. i have so many more thoughts on them but maybe later idk

asmo:

like levi, they’re relatively fast friends, but their relationship has a lot more highs and lows before it mellows out. lydia has a really bitchy (affectionate) side that asmo brings out in them, for better and for worse. they have so much fun gossiping and messing around, but they’re also really quick to upset each other if either of them is having a bad day so they can rocket into some real housewives shit really quickly. i think asmo is definitely attracted to them, but it’s really hard to figure out in what way, which is part of the reason that their initial relationship is so tumultuous -- the dynamic he wants is constantly shifting in nature, so one day they’re totally fine as friends, and the next day he’s mad all day because he can sense her thinking of satan and they both wind up lashing out at each other. once their relationship finally settles into (asmo’s version of) platonic, they start to get along a lot better.

that said, i think lydia sees asmo as the easiest to talk to in the house, despite the fact that they aren’t always the closest. i’d say up until she and satan get together, asmo probably has more dirt on her than anyone else in the house. i think they’re at their best getting sloppy drunk in asmo’s room at 2pm on a wednesday afternoon.

beel:

arguably the fastest relationship she forms in the house. when she first gets to the devildom, beel’s indifference towards her rather than outright hostility immediately makes her more comfortable with him (i always forget how mean everyone is in the beginning lol). post-pact they get along extremely well in a quiet sort of way -- they don’t have very much in common but they vibe so well that it’s not at all uncommon to just see them hanging out in complete silence, content as can be.

they do both wind up developing small crushes on each other a little bit after their pact forms, but they go on one (1) date and it becomes immediately obvious that their relationship doesn’t work like that. they both walk away embarrassed but with no hard feelings LMFAO. they’re still extremely close and (post-belphie reveal) goes toe to toe with belphie for president of the beelzebub fan club

belphegor:

ACRIMONIOUS AS FUCK -- i don’t think they ever really consider each other “friends” until well into s2 (although the point where they actually become friends is probably a little earlier. lydia has a passing interest in demonology, so she’s obviously familiar with belphegor’s name from the very first time she meets him, and pretty quickly realized that the avatar of sloth was conspicuously absent when she first met everyone. so when they finally get to the attic, she immediately puts two and two together and calls him on his shit, so the vibes are already rancid from the jump. ultimately, she only actually decides to let him out because (1) she fully believes that lucifer would banish one of his brothers to the attic for a dumbass reason, and (2) she trusts beel’s judgement and hates seeing how torn up he is about belphie being gone. so when he fucking murders her, she’s obviously traumatized but also like... disappointed but not surprised.

so obviously it takes them a hot minute to even get to a neutral relationship, much less a positive one -- and a lot of the heavy lifting there is really done by beel. she’s entirely unresponsive to his attempts to reconcile in the immediate aftermath, and the only time they ever actually spend together is either doing anti-lucifer league shit with satan or hanging out with beel sitting between them like a brick wall. they eventually make their pact on lydia’s last night in the devildom (belphegor and lucifer’s pact orders are switched, roughly) as a first step towards actually getting along in the future.

once they actually do finally start hanging out for real, they find that they actually do have similarities in that they’re both kind of apathetic and exhausted all the time. it takes a minute, but they ultimately do become nap buddies and he becomes her favorite brother to go to -- even over satan sometimes -- when she’s stressed the fuck out, because he’s the only one that wont give unsolicited advice or try way too hard to cheer her up, and they’ll just kind of nap and vibe together.

like lucifer, i dont think anything even approaching romantic interest happens with them -- they just kind of vibe and snark at each other/every other person around them

relationships with the datables:

diavolo: lydia immediately develops a massive panicked crush on him when she first arrives in the devildom. horrified by it and is extremely nervous around him for the majority of s1 -- she gets really overly polite which confuses everyone because she’s kind of cold at first otherwise.

towards the end of s1, after the big reveal, she kind of loses most of that when she realizes how manipulative he can be sometimes. she doesn’t start actively disliking him or anything, but she loses a lot of trust in him and starts to treat him in the same way that she treats everyone else (which is actually a relief to him). ultimately, once she gets over her crush, they settle into a relationship that’s probably best defined as “close acquaintances.” lydia is more than happy to chat with diavolo for a few hours, or come to dinner at the castle; and diavolo likes that she doesn’t sugarcoat the things she says to him and helps him convince lucifer to lighten the fuck up -- but i dont think either of them consider the other their go-to person to hang out with.

barbatos: lydia believes mammon when he talks about barbatos torturing people beneath the castle, so pretty much until the end of s2 she wildly vacillates between being terrified of him and being unbearably intrigued by him.

their relationship develops really slowly until they finally get to a point where they’re doing anything beyond exchanging pleasantries -- not for any real reason beyond the fact that they finally feel familiar enough with each other to get there. they really enjoy getting into obscenely long-winded discussions with each other, as well as just sitting quietly together for tea. i think in an au, they could have been a pretty good romantic match, but ultimately their relationship winds up being pretty similar to her relationship with diavolo.

simeon: another extremely awkward initial crush, made worse by the fact that lydia is acutely aware of the fact that he’s an angel and they’re not exactly what you’d call “morally upright.” where she was just embarrassed by her crush on diavolo, she feels actively inferior around simeon, despite the fact that he’s given her no real reason to feel that way.

like barbatos, the problem in their relationship really just resolves itself with time, as lydia and simeon spend more time together and as she unlearns her own misconceptions about angels and the celestial realm. she’s more than happy to go shopping with him and luke, or to just sit and talk with him -- plus she thinks his secret catty side is fucking hilarious and tries to encourage it as much as possible. i think that her crush on him would return in full force when it’s revealed that he wrote TSL, but it ultimately fades again and he goes back to just being her good friend.

luke:

immediately triggers her oldest-sibling syndrome and immediately develops a sibling relationship with him. she’ll come by purgatory hall and help out with his homework or bake with him and just listen to him kid-ramble about whatever he’s thinking about at that moment. she also thinks its very funny to lie to him about the human realm, which simeon hates and solomon enables completely.

solomon:

rivals to friends to lovers. she really hates his smug attitude in early s1, but after he swipes her from lucifer during the retreat/following her pact with asmo, they start actually talking to each other as equals rather than with weird playful hostility/flirting.

they love hanging out with each other and talking about anything and everything, and solomon is impressed by the speed at which they start to pick up magic. they definitely nurse crushes on each other starting right around the end of s1, but ultimately by virtue of lydia spending most of her time in the house of lamentation, her romantic relationship with satan grows quicker and he resigns himself to having lost. he’s a little bitter about it but hides it really well.

ultimately, though, she and satan wind up spending so much time with him just because of how well they all mesh, that he winds up just being incorporated into their relationship without any discussion ever needing to take place. i have a ton of thoughts on this dynamic as well but i’ll spare the details lol

new characters coming soon i’m stuck in mid s2 hell right now so idk much about them but as a general overview:

raphael: annoying

mephistopheles: annoying but in a funny way

thirteen: girlfriend who wants to kill her so so bad

design overview:

meiker link (actual ref sheet coming soon maybe idk)

[kidnamedfinger]

Tbh I don't think it has a place in modern music at all. There's absolutely no reason to care Abt vocal technique unless you're an actual opera singer, classical music doesn't even work the same way classical music "should" anymore. Modern auto tune is absolutely insane and it's been used so much-most people can't tell the difference. And it sounds like a bad thing because people are absolutely cruel to singers, they don't understand there's literally no way to PERFECTLY sing every time, no matter your skill level because of the way vocal folds and your ears work-but in reality it's like the basis for all of modern music. That 00s robot voice auto tune is a special recording effect-real auto tune is simply pitch correction, which for some people would be drastically changing the note right(which you still couldn't tell) or just making someone less flat/sharp. The vocal analysis stuff is fun if you just want to learn what someone's range is-but that's really it. "Projection" doesn't matter unless you're an opera singer, my brains blanking but they have to use a special technique to get over the sound of those instruments-and even then, different voice types can only get so loud/are agile versus not ect. There's four different soprano voice types that can do different things-analyzing what one can do is fine-but actually ranking then doesn't make much sense bc they're just inherently different instruments. Like does it really matter that so and so can't "project" properly if they're singing into a microphone versus an opera singer needing to? Does t matter that Hayley makes her voice break on certain vowels/versus Ariana on others-and they both have different parts where they go into head voice? My question to people is, does it matter that Hayley Williams can't do a whistle register while Ariana Grande can? Like of course not, they sing different genres are different singers-but they both actually have the same voice type. You can "tune" your instrument to sing a certain way-like old school Broadway enunciates differently than modern-but a lyric soprano is different than a contralto because they just sound differently by nature-even in opera where their job is to literally be louder than a 50+ orchestra-but even then, Olivia Rodriguo sounds a lot different from SZA and they both have the same exact sub voice type too. If you're watching the NCT bts stuff-look who has to step back when they do their high notes. There's a video where Hayley from Paramore is recording something from after laughter, and she does the same thing-theyre doing that bc there's actually no need for them to be that loud-but that's how you belt-with your full body either chest or head voice BUT the mic is going to amplify that-so they have to step back or angle their head a certain way. Those videos have a place for fun-but when people start the "tone" "projection" stuff is usually where they show their hand-a lot of that stuff is up to the microphone and soundboard people-and ultimately doesn't matter in modern pop music. You can project as much as you want-and it's a skull to have-like make your voice work-but it won't matter 99% if the time unless your acoustic.

Tbh my opinion on th self producing idol thing is clouded by th fact I've been here a while and like lol it's just Big Bang all over again, and to a lesser extent 2ne1. I think Bangchan probably has a good amount of say on what the sounds may INITIALLY sound like, but I wouldn't be surprised if Jyp is more hands on than he lets on. Big Bang has GD at the helm, but he was fully trained under Teddy-and Like most pop music credits don't really mean anything. An artist can include an adlib,change a lyric, ask they use this synth instead of the this ect ect super small changes-and they can get a writing or composition or producing credit. And those overlap a LOT already. I know for skz they have 3racha on there for almost everything but they also have one dude tagged along all the time roo-and they never mention him during press stuff because it goes against that self produced narrative. I fully think 3racha produces to an extent and then Jyp steps in and is like uhhhhhh and helps structure's stuff. Just like what Yg did with Bb, and what most of the companies east and west do for pop music. Beyonce's gotten in trouble because she's asked for songs and demos or whatever and then recorded the songs-and then asked to be named as xyza on credits-and people have felt forced to sign off on it, it's like an open secret lol. It would not surprise me if it moved th same way in Loop with our if house producers too-but it's why the big 4 tend to use the same people over and over again (teddy/gd,sm loves the swedish dudes for shinee/exo and lsm loves Dem joints for NCT,bts that one dude ect ect). There's just no way any of these companies with how visual kpop is, let's their idol create a song on their own and makes and spends thousands of not millions of dollars on promotions off that. If you have the time the 9muses documentary is really sad but they show how involved down to the dance formation it is-not just this looks cool but so and so is pretty, so and so is th visual up here ect. It's old as shit now-but they came from a bumfuck company-from ex trainees on YouTube to interviews, the big 3 are even more hands on, and if you follow idols long enough from any company, like I've been here since I was 11 lol-its really sad that everytime they start to experience more creative freedoms or freedom overall-its the same story again and again. Everything is absolutely decided until a certain point in their careers-and they have to fight to get a say in clothing/sound/hair all of it.

(BIG GENERALITIES NEXT)

I think there's a huge gap between male and female "self produced" idols because of image. Even with girl crush groups their off stage personas tend to be we can be cool/sexy/hard on stage or whatever but they're ultimately more girl next door or shy usually. Like, 2ne1 was the oh girl crush or whatever and CL never wrote a single rap until she went to America, all of those were Teddy. It's misogyny and ultimately it's probably an image thing. Like when the idols are talking Abt making their own choreo/songs/lyrics what have you-its ultimately more assertive right? Like, if this is bad or whatever it hypothetically falls on the idol.Why throw that on a female idol who's either doing girl crush-which Is about being relatable or aspirational in a believable way-like Omg she's so cool on stage but she's just like me off-or cute/girl next door/sexy that's based even more in sexual/physical availability? With men in kpop it falls the same way-its supposed to be that dichotomy they sell you or a full package of whatever image. But it's still ultimately sold to the opposite sex, and assumed that they're straight. Boygroups are allowed to say they made xyzada or whatever themselves b cause they're being sold to girls. Girl groups can't because they're girls either being sold to girls so they can't be TOO unrelatable or sold to men so they can't be threatening. And there's like exceptions I think that gidle girl does stuff for her grp-but again is she really? Doing it and even if she is, people tend to blame her a lot for line distribution-and her public persona fully relies on being a bad bitch ALL the time-not like BP/Itzy ect.

ok yes i think i agree too abt the first part. i think its fun to find ppls ranges too lol that will never change but i definitely see that there is such a divergence between the importance of aligning with specific vocal technique that is considered "good" and being able to market your voice as part of an overall performance even if its partially to completely divorced from technical standards of "goodness." this is also how ive felt abt kpop stans debating if their faves are good bc they sing live or bad bc they dont.... SO many factors go into that convo. e.g. most idols are overworked and fatigued they would just not do well singing live for every single commitment they have. and plus, like we're discussing, those amazing takes they can get in the studio are so manipulated not necessarily in terms of effects but in terms of they will be hard to reproduce on the spot multiple times a week. also i was so surprised when i found out you can put those small auxiliary effects on a mic ... so even if someone is singing live in like an "acoustic" performance that won't necessarily be the same performance they'd give if they were singing right in front of you totally off the cuff.

i think youre def right abt the 'self-production' not being as admirable a risk as its advertised as being. my first exposure to this was when wonder girls did why so lonely - they were doing a band conept before with reboot but they didn't even play their instruments on that one. but even for why so lonely which was billed as the first song they all wrote together and marked the "full transformation" into a band, it was actually written by only 3/4 of the girls plus a random songwriter they brought in. and that songwriter has like no other interesting credits apart from why so lonely.

i also have always wondered on the flip side - i totally believe some idols are getting prod credits bc it looks good to make them seem like self producing idols even if they just suggest a vocal flair or change or lyrics or smth. but why would an idol be denied a lyric credit for doing those same things? (im specifically thinking abt the girls again lol like cant they just toss them that one bone ???)

AND another question that arises is re: the amount of fluent english speakers that will sing nonfluent english on the track. i am starting to see that a lot of things i used to write off as sloppy in kpop production (breathy voice, nasality etc.) re genuinely predeterkined stylistic choices. so at first i was like "why would johnny sing 'just seeing you never satisfy my soul' that doesn't make sense in english" but that phrase probably already had several people go through it and they decided it was the best verse for the meter or for johnnys performance or smth. also in the universe behind they literally had a moment where they told yangyang to sing a korean lyric as if it was in english. which i feared was kind of setting him up since korean isnt his native language and that pronounciation could have been mistaken for "him not being proficient enough" but that didnt actually seem to happen in real life lol.

your point about girls assuming the risk if they "self produce" something controversial or bad is so true. i think girl fans condone sooo much shit that boy groups do, obviously the boys have their own random restrictions but girl fans will blame fellow fans or antis or other groups or other groups' fans before they blame a boy idol for most things. also i made a post about this a long time ago but i only recently realized how cool it is that some idols have like no interest in self producing. like taemin has broken so many barriers in terms of creative control and image with sm and he has already given songwriting a shot but at the same time he is able to command a performance so well even when the choreo, lyrics, music, production, styling, image, cultural references etc. do not have his involvement at all. worse than letting girls just deliver a prepackaged image/concept that the company has deemed successful is forcing them to try out self producing because its en vogue only for their songs to flop or just be boring because nobody is actually in it for the love of the music alone.

and i DID see the 9muses documentary!! it was insane honestly that the company let that be published, it is so damning to so many ppl in that team. but at the same time, it is a greater commentary that they might have given it the green light knowing that it wouldnt actually hurt their career to show these kinds of things, bc that kind of abuse and control is just so normalized in the industry. i dont doubt a lot of girl groups from nugu companies are going thru the same shit as 9muses or worse to this day - even if the trend of sexyfying teenagers the way they did for 9muses (like specifically saying they were looking for girls with given minimum of attractiveness) has become a bit passé, there is probably an analogue with girlcrushifying trainees like u were saying bc thats what is trendy now

[g3nosarchive]

ok i genuinely think a lot of other people have this problem but stop inserting yourself when xyz issue is mentioned. when someone is telling you that a person, a celebrity, some franchise is harming their identity or anyone’s identity as a minority, or part of a certain race or religion or anything shut the fuck up and accept it.

they do not need to know your emotional attachment to said thing, your disbelief, your horror, your personal experience - we didn’t ask for all that. we know just how bad it is, cus yk it harms us maybe? we’ve already gone through the cycle of being angry and indignant and now we’re here trying to get you to understand in the hopes that as a friend you do what you’re meant to do when you became friends with us. we are not your constant ball of anger to use whenever you find something that’s “crazy, unbelievably, shockingly” once again, a hate crime, when you decide you want to feel angry and care about it.

more under the cut bc i talk too much

by doing that, you’re making an issue that you didn’t even know about suddenly yours. ask yourself, what is the purpose for telling anyone all that? to get them to sympathize with you personally so you can get a pass because you didn’t know? of course you don’t know, of course you’re unaware, that’s the whole reason why you’re being told in the first place. do not water down the issue or even try to play the ‘everything has some issue like this so there’s no point in going this far’ card. especially as a white person. the reason why you don’t know primarily is because it doesn’t affect you and it doesn’t cross your mind.

when you watch a show with a black character, you don’t care about how off the character design is or how stereotypical and borderline racist the comedy gag surrounding said character is. when you listen to your favorite white music artists or watch your favorite movie with a majority white cast, white staff, white team, and white theme, you don’t care to analyze just how outdated and stereotypical the way that token asian character is portrayed. some of y’all don’t understand and will never understand the mental struggle and awareness forever plugged into the brain of lgbt and/or poc, especially black people when we consume anything, when we go anywhere, when we meet new people, to constantly catch those micro aggressions and know what to avoid.

so when someone tells you insert classic hot mess is racist and you should stop supporting it, one of the worst things you can do beside outright rejecting it is to defend it and insinuate that we don’t know what we’re talking about, that we need 30 different sources to prove it all, that you don’t think (for example taylor swifts dream colonized africa mv) is bad. you try to say the thing or person that is actively promoting all this homophobia, racism, transmisogyny etc needs to be kindly educated, is trying their best, will learn soon enough, just wasn’t educated, will do better in the future (esp looking at u kpop stans). does their apparent regret but refusal to properly apologize actually matter? the damage has already been done.

that in itself is a privilege i could never have. i don’t even try being a fan of any major white celebrity or any kpop group because i guarantee if i search up their name with ‘racist’, ‘sexist’, ‘homophobic’, ‘transphobic’, ‘cultural appropriation’ behind it something or some image is bound to show up. you will all say “oh they haven’t done anything yet” but when it comes out that they did, they have, and they do not care about who it affects, suddenly it’s a bombshell dropped on you out of nowhere.

it’s not that hard to spot these things actually. if your fav is constantly putting themselves against people of color, saying shady shit about non cishets while being a cishet themself, saying one thing and doing another, or has been silent when their voice was expected to speak up, shouldn’t you notice? y’all will reblog all these posts but in reality only 10% are actually reading and listening and actually digesting this information for future use.

and i think the thing that pisses me off is this is all from personal experience where i’m speaking from. over the past 2 days the amount of times if i’ve heard about the “tea that dropped w meghan markle” is ridiculous and annoying. a girl texted me and i sat there and i realized that she does this on a daily basis to fuel my anger and get me to validate her own useless anger. of course i knew about it and i wasn’t surprised at all - she’s still a black woman.

almost every black blog on here, when they get big enough, deals with some sort of weird shit surrounding their blackness. if you get big on speaking about issues you are now this emotionless token ‘smart black person i can actually trust’ to use as your replacement for google. this is not to say asking questions is bad, but it is so easy to pull up some of the shit you guys ask for. some people get called slurs directly, targeted for being too black or not black enough, attacked for their features and etc and someone mentioned this before but the only people that care in those situations are other black people themselves. white people will have blm in their bio but turn the other way the minute some anon starts acting up in their mutuals’ inbox, calling them a dark1e because they felt confident enough to post some selfies. and then you get sad when we dont go to you for any kind of support? 

i’ve stated sometimes that asking me questions on issues and things is okay, but one of the main reasons i say that is because whether i say it or not, i’ll be asked questions and expected to know everything and i am your personal walking encyclopedia and ofc it’s natural for me to have all this information in my head, as if i didn’t research it myself. but then i think about the numerous amounts of people that specifically say not to ask them this shit because it really does tire you out, that they don’t want to have to deal with this in any space but they still get them. 

and then the ones that don’t even know themself so people will use them as an example and say “well this person didn’t know and they’re ‘marginalized identity’ so it should be fine for me too”. good god just apologize, show that you really care, change your behavior and move on. do you think it was fun being asked the statistics for george floyd’s and other black peoples death in class? that you were being inclusive and giving me a chance to show off my intelligence, to prove to others that i really had something up here and you were my greatest star eyes white friend that gave me that chance? i cant close my posts like this properly but i want you to think about that shit and actually ask yourself if you’d do that. a lot of you will read this and think “i’m not that type of racist” “i don’t have those deep seated prejudices in me” yes you do. you just haven’t been called out on it.

for all the shit ive dealt with above, if i’ve ever talked to you about this before dont come to me to apologize i do not need it and you are not the only person i’ve received this from. i guarantee you that there’s about 20 other people i’ve thought about while writing this post considering i’m a black person in the real world, so keep your guilt to yourself an deal with it

white people don’t add on to this

[aclosetfan]

“Jeez,” you’re obviously thinking, “what could she possibly say about Blossom that hasn’t already been written about by a fic writer who specializes in either romance, angst, or a cheap combo deal of both genres??? Gonna analyze how she’s not actually perfect? Inherently flawed? Gonna reduce her to a bitch? Gonna tell us how she’s the perfect boss girl? Maybe say she’s awkward? OCD? Stoic? Motherly? All knowing?? That no one but the male character you’ve paired her with can outwit her? That’s all been done. What possible take could you make that is a new refreshing look at Blossom that I haven’t already seen?”

And I’d be like damn, chill, dude. Take a breath. It’s not that deep. I’m not gonna say any of that. Nah, ima do you ya one worse and list all the reasons why Blossom Utonium would be The Most Annoying Sibling anyone could ask for.

Like yes. She’s bossy. And yes. She’s a know-it-all, but everyone already KNOWS that. It’s the OTHER stuff she does that drives her sisters mad.

“Well, I’m the oldest!” “You are not the oldest! We were created simultaneously! You are literally NOT the oldest!” “Well, if we go by the order we were named in, I’m-“ “THAT DOESNT MAKE YOU THE OLDEST!” “Tch. That is such a youngest sibling thing to say, Buttercup.” [temper tantrum that coincidentally proves Blossom’s point]

Blossom’s motto is she’s right 100% of the time, even when she’s wrong. It’s some mightier-then-thou bullshit that has lead her to be on the receiving end of a few wedgies when she was little

She’s the fun-police. No fun allowed! Until, of course, she wants to annoy you, and then everything’s fair game.

she’s a dorky nerd 👏 not in the “she can’t cook, lol” or the “haha Blossom likes to read” but in the “oh so when you said you knew about the Second Bulgarian Empire’s first war with the Latin Empire in the year 1204, you really meant you know about the Second Bulgarian Empire’s first war with the Latin Empire in the year 1204” kind of way and guess who has the privilege of hearing about it at 2am????

Bad jokes. Bad jokes. Bad jokes. She’s got the cheesiest one liners! And the worst part is she always says them right before they start fighting the bad guys

No! Wait! Actually the worst part is the fact that Blossom doesn’t seem to realize the oneliners are so incrediably cheesy they even make the bad guys cringe. So despite her sisters protest, she just keeps doing it because she thinks her word play is so clever.

When Blossom gets laughing, like really laughing, she’s got the ugliest, snortiest laugh that’s so damn funny if her bad pun didn’t make you laugh, you’re certainly laughing now

On her days off from being a superhero, catch my girl numbing her brain with the absolutely worst soap operas the world has ever produced, and after they’re done she makes you sit there and psychoanalyze every scene

She’s a big movie talker but lord forbid you have anything to say during the movie 🙄 she bites your head off

For someone so freaking smart, she sure does fuck up laundry. It’s her least favorite chore. the amount of times the WHOLE family has had to pitch away articles of clothing because something very pink or very red bled through all the whites again is ungodly.

Speaking of clothes, she’s the one that’s always magically finding things “on her side of the closest” so obviously “she thought it was okay to wear” and “really you’re making a big deal out of nothing.”

Bathroom hog. Bathroom hog. Bathroom hog. She’s got too much hair not to be, and speaking of hair!!!! It is everywhere! She sheds like a freaking cat. One time Buttercup had a hair in her mouth, pulled it out, and to her horror, kept pulling until the long red strand was safely pinched between her fingers. It left her overdramatically gagging for days.

The epitome of elegance and grace until she falls flat on her face. It seems like on top of all of Townsville, Blossom needs a great deal of saving herself.

“Can you please stop comparing everything to the Bulgarian conflict of 1204?”

Oof you remember that one girl from high school that was just too nice?? Was always so attentive to anyone who was talking to her? A VERY active listener?? And the evil part of you would go “god what the fuck is her problem?” That girl you’re thinking of right now is actually Blossom Utonium.

At the same time, she’ll blackmail the hell out of her sisters when she’s being petty and doesn’t feel like doing a chore or saving the day, leaving them to wonder if the “everything nice” is just one big ruse. Blossom’s always just there for the worst and most embarrassing moments. She caught one of them making out with a movie poster. She caught the other in the closest sobbing to the latest Disney soundtrack. She’s got things in her back pocket that would ruin them

And they don’t have any freaking dirt on her!!?!?!??! It makes them scream!🤬🤬

And no one believes them!! No one believes Buttercup or Bubbles when they (loudly) complain about how awfully annoying Blossom is. No one believes that sweet, nice, mild-mannered Blossom could ever be vindictive, or talkative, or mean. No one! And when BC and Bubs look over at Blossom, after another person has laughed them off, she’s wearing a shit-eating grin, because they all know no one will ever, ever, believe them.

She blows a kiss their way and waves her fingers in hello, but it’s okay, because three seconds later she trips over her own feet and sports a bruise on her forehead the whole rest of the day. (Still BC and Bubs get in trouble for laughing)

The most annoying part about Blossom, though, is that despite it all, somehow, Buttercup and Bubbles love her anyways. What’s a seemingly perfect “older” sister if they don’t bug the shit out of you???

“If you don’t shut up RIGHT NOW and go to sleep, I’ll ship your dead body to Bulgaria, do not push me!”