#Redness yapper
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barkbarkyapyap · 4 months ago
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Thinking about the bat family doing normal family shit and it’s just a painful reminder that they are still human people and humans are kinda silly.
Like
They go ice skating and Jason, 6ft and 225 pound, the Red Hood, is comically bad at ice skating. One foot on the ice and he’s on his back with his feet in the air like a cartoon.
And he denies it the whole time but his legs shake and he clings to the wall with white knuckles while muttering curses like he’s trying to spell his feet to work.
And Dick is just great with all his balance and figure skating stupid fucking acrobat bastard-
Or they decide to go see a movie as a family. It’s a horror movie, and they assume everyone will be fine because they see enough horror in their daily life.
And normally they would be, but this is a slasher. So it’s all suspense and jumpscares and gore. And Tim, Tim who loves psychological thrillers and can see movie endings coming from miles away, is suddenly clinging to Dick’s arm as subtly as possible because every scare has him tensing and trying not to yelp.
Or they go out to a carnival, with rollercoasters and bad food and worse games to win dumb prizes. They’re walking around, splitting up to do various activities, and Dick and Damian comes up to Bruce and asks him to go home.
Why? Because Dick drank too much soda, he refuses to use the bathrooms. He has an irrational fear of outhouses. And Damian saw one of the mascots walking around, a man in some kind of shitty lion suit with a vest, and is convinced the lion suited man is going to get him. (Bruce does take them home, but Jason teases them the whole way.)
Just silly things that show how they are people beneath the masks.
Love it.
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clingonlikeclingwrap · 6 months ago
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Love TimBernKon bc usually ships have opposing dynamics but with those guys it’s just
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jaysgirlx · 1 year ago
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"Need help sweetheart?" Bookstore Customer!Jason Todd helps you reach the books on the higher shelves. You were his favorite employee and he wanted to make your day easier. He'd been coming here for a while but you always forgot how tall he was and how good his body felt pressed against yours. You only knew how to mumble out a couple words because you didn't know what else to say to a man like that. "Uh sir, you don't need to-"
"Please call me anything but sir sweetheart, you know I'm not new here"
Bookstore Customer!Jason enjoyed teasing his favorite employee aka you of course. He teases you about working at the bookstore even though he's constantly there and he'll always be flirting with you even if you're working the counter that day. He knows he's holding up the line but he's a paying customer so he doesn't care.
"How's my favorite pretty girl doing?"
"M'tired today Jay, I can't handle your nonsense right now"
"Okay that was mean- wait, Jay? that's a first"
"Buy a book or get out Jason"
You could easily tell Jason liked classics and poetry but for some reason he was willing to read your favorites even if they were a smut-filled mess. One time, he backed you up into a corner, after reading one of those books you liked, "Hmm, you like this kind of shit baby? cause I can do all that to you and so much more"
Over time, you learned that Jason also likes to follow you to the store, whispering to you about all the things he could do to you if you'd let him. His hand is always on your hips, pressing his body fully into you. He knows you like it especially when you roll your hips into his when nobody's looking. He wishes you'd use your words and just say you were his but he knew he wasn't even close to getting that, at least not yet.
Jason tried to buy a new book every week, sometimes not even to read. He needed an excuse to be there since your boss has never been fond of him ever since he had caught him feeling you up near the back shelves once. He learned his lesso so now he purposefully buys the books you like, just so he can watch you ramble on and on about them without getting kicked out of the store.
Bookstore Customer!Jason thrived on the feeling he got from watching you go from being so nonchalant around him to the most talkative girl in the world. he wants you comfortable if he's going to fuck you. You find yourself shutting up one time because you thought you had bored him but he quickly gets rid of that thought for you, "Keep talking sweetheart, I'm just wondering how pretty your mouth would look with my cock stuffed down your throat"
"Jay I don't- I can't- I haven't-"
"Don't worry, you will and I'm sure you're a fast learner"
It wasn't that hard for you to notice that Jason got a little jealous when his brother Dick hits on you the first and last time he brings him to the bookstore. Dick easily chats you up and Jason watches the two become a bit too friendly for his liking but it wasn't his place to speak, "Now I see why my little brother brings home so many books"
"It's good he does, I like guys who read"
"I actually quite the fan of classic literature-"
"Oh shut up Dick"
Bookstore Customer!Jason had all your coworkers wondering if you'll ever let the poor guy hit. They weren't sure if Jason was interested in you or your body, regardless they couldn't ignore the smile you got whenever he walk in. Or the way you'd laugh at his dumb jokes. You had him on a leash and you didn't even know what to do with him. He's begging to take you out or just even spent a night with you. He didn't just want you, he needed you. "C'mon I promise to take care of you princess, I'll even take you to that little coffee shop in Bludhaven"
"Who told you about that?!"
"…Dick"
When he finally manages to convince you to let him kiss you, you're nervous as fuck. You thought this was just another one of his antics but no, this was real. He'd promised to stop hitting on you if you felt nothing and you should've know it was bad idea when you could hear your own heartbeat still your let his lips touch yours. It was such a bad idea because before you knew it, he's got you pushed up against the wall, leg parting your thighs with your hands gripping at his shirt. "Jay, more please" Suddenly after all this time, you're pleading for him. Oh how the tables have turned. You're begging for all he's got, and you know he has so much more to give.
"Just give me a moment baby, got be patient" Within a matter of minutes your pants are discarded on the floor, and your panties are still on but being pushed aside while two fingers are being pumped in and out of your pussy. He's got one hand on your hips holding you down while one of your legs is wrapped around his waist. "Didn't I tell you I could do some much for you baby?"
You nod quickly while he's sucking on your poor neck, that would definitely be red all tomorrow. you feel his teeth sink into your skin, not too hard but rough enough to leave a mark. "Now keep quiet, I don't want any of your coworkers hearing us back here" The next thing you know you're cumming on the boy's fingers and he wants you to do it again. and again. and possibly 50 more times if you're willing.
The next time Jason comes, he's holding what you think is flowers and you know he'll be your victim today.
"So I thought real flowers would be cheesy and you'd probably not want to take care of em, so my brothers taught me how to make these paper flowers and…here just take them"
"Wow, I'm getting hand-crafted flowers from THE Jason Todd? Someone must have a really big crush on me huh? Are those bandaids on your fingers? Want me to kiss your boo-boos? "
"Are you going to finally go out with me or do I have to make you cum-"
"Yes yes! Just do not finish that sentence out loud"
"You are soooooooooo in love me"
"Jay, get out"
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nofingjustaninchident · 6 months ago
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how can someone like this be canonically ugly? i want him to *** ** ******* * **** *** **** *** ****** *** ** ** ***** * **** ***** *******
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prlssprfctn · 3 months ago
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My daily Jason's dogs-related metaphors agenda resumes its delivery. Thank you for your attention.
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kittykatninja321 · 1 year ago
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The reason why I always emphasize that utrh era Jason is 18/19 and refuse to let people forget that Jason and Tim are canonically 2 years apart is because the concept of Jason as a fairly young adult with little to no support system is a fascinating concept to me and it goes under explored in both canon and fanon. I think it adds such an interesting wrinkle to the everything and is a great contrast to all the Red Hood shit. I’m thinking about New Earth Jason specifically here, he’s both younger than post-nu52 Jason and more isolated. Most people at 19, even if they can afford to be out on their own in this economy, still have contact with their family of origin for support. Jason is not only estranged from his family with little to no support system (depending on how much you interpret Talia being involved after Lost Days), he’s also doing mob boss shit while he’s still technically young enough to be somebody’s prom date. He didn’t go to his prom because he was probably in Russia learning how to make bombs or something (and because, yknow, the whole dying thing).
Jason is someone who both had to grow up too fast and by all means should be somewhat emotionally stunted. Not only does trauma stunt you he was catatonic for long enough that he’s missing literal years from his adolescence. He’s young enough that he’s still reeling from trauma from childhood and adolescence (late teens/ early twenties are peak ‘desperately trying to recover from childhood’ era).
I think underneath the rough Red Hood exterior that Jason should be naive in ways that people wouldn’t really expect. He doesn’t have much experience with relationships (both romantic and friendships), and it’s been years since he’s socialized much with people his age (he doesn’t socialize much at all he’s pretty isolated). I think even if he doesn’t look young that at times he would slip up and show that he is
Also I just love the contrast. I like the idea that sometimes you’ll hear Red Hood cackle without the helmet on and you’ll recognize traces of that 15 year old kid and then he’ll shoot someone immediately after. Like imagine if utrh was a Boy King of the underworld sorta deal
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redsea8me · 9 months ago
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One day Soundwave will learn to keep his mouth shut
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everwalldigan · 3 months ago
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Reading utrh and GOD the way just the SUSPICION of Jason being red hood drove BATMAN who was in the height of another one of his “shutting everyone out cause I cannot handle another loss” phases after Stephs death, to drop EVERYTHING and seek out help from literally everyone he knows.
BATMAN going to ask help from his friends, just based on the FEELING that Red hood was familiar without any further confirmation. I mean Jason hasn’t even alluded to anything at this point, it was just the way he acted that sparked the gut destroying hope that maybe this time, maybe this one time Bruce could have someone back.
The hope was so all-consuming that he literally left Gotham quasi without a protector just to try to squash that stupid hope by convincing himself that what he’s yearning for isn’t possible, only to not get any solid answer from the literal gods and magicians he reached out to.
Like just how monumental is that. Just how much pain is this man in that just the slight inkling of recognition drove him to travel all around the world to ask for HELP, something that he only ever reluctantly does.
He doesn’t even know what he wants the answers to be, he doesn’t know if the crushed hope would destroy him more than its actualisation. The uncertainty is so much worse than both of these options, because if he doesn’t know what’s going on how is he supposed to prepare or protect?
It just makes me sick like the utrh movie did not show this and tbh I think it’s a missed opportunity.
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Like GODD just the helplessness of uncertainty is torture in and of itself.
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kronosveritas · 2 months ago
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Amazing commission I got from forever ago by @punzoclown that I just realized I never posted
TUCKINGTON MY BELOVED
I never posted this because right around that time I fell off the face of the earth and did NOT post on tumblr for a while, but LOOK! HERE THEY ARE. THE GAYS.
I love them. Also, punzoclown is very talented and incredibly cooperative to work with on these sorts of things, highly recommend. Sharkylass was really great too. Highly recommend them both.
(Wash isn’t as short here as I typically like to draw him, but that’s on me for forgetting to be more specific lol)
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arthursfuckinghat · 1 year ago
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The sun is your halo, for it is always above you.
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Arthur and Weetabix 𑁦𐂂𑁦 Scarlett Meadows
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th1rstf0rbl00d · 5 months ago
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*romantically stabs him*
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barkbarkyapyap · 4 months ago
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I love reading batfam media and seeing the different sides of the fandom.
Like there are the hardcore canon people that get mad over the simplest stuff.
And then there’s the rest of us that have collectively decided to not be allergic to joy and we just want to see the birds and bats actually happy for once.
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clingonlikeclingwrap · 8 months ago
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“Good Listener”
A dynamic I realised I like 😌
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ennkis · 1 year ago
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VROOM (harry lewis x reader)
summary : in which y/n and harry get invited to go to the silverstone formula one grand prix (2023)
face claim : no one exact
notes : im an absolute noob at writing fics so please excuse the quality lmao. im petrified of posting on here but ive been thinking about starting a blog for over a year. im open to feedback, opinions and any sort of questions/advice is welcome! i happen to waffle a lot so just skip those parts if uninterested. this is my first post so enjoy 😝 also pls request because i have the creativity of a koala so id appreciate some ideas :D
pairings : harry lewis x reader , lando norris x platonic!reader
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"WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?! Are you actually serious?" You asked your boyfriend in genuine shock, followed by a laugh from the man dressed in head to toe in Ferrari merch. The red and yellow colors clashed hilariously with the sleek, orange McLaren paddock pass hanging around his neck.
"What? I thought I'd support the winning team." He shrugged, a cheeky grin spreading across his face. You and Harry got invited by the Mclaren F1 team to watch the Silverstone Grand Prix from the paddock. As a Formula 1 fan youself, you were excited to see the cars upclose. To watch the mechanics to the pitstops, engineers do their things (idk what they do lmao) and to watch Max Verstappen overlap the whole grid like seven times. Even since you were a little kid you were amazed by those cars driving freakishly quickly. Now, several years later you get to experience it right infront of your eyes.
"Look, there's Lando!" Harry pointed out, spotting your friend talking to a group of mechanics. You approached Lando, who broke into a wide grin as he saw you. "Hey! There are my favorite YouTubers!"
You beamed. "Lando! It's so good to see you. How's it going?"
"It's been wild but amazing," Lando replied, glancing at Harry. "And I see you've managed to get Harry in the right gear this time."
Harry laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. "Yeah, I had a little help with that."
Lando gave you two a playful nudge. "So, who are you rooting for today? Besides me, of course."
You laughed. "Well, McLaren, obviously. But I'm also excited to see how the Brits perform. It's going to be an interesting race."
"That's the spirit," Lando said, his eyes twinkling with excitement. "Alright, I better get back to my team, but I'll see you guys later? Enjoy the race!"
You and Harry found a spot in the back of Landos garage, it had a view on the screens but also the pit-stop. The whole race went by fast. The moment the lights went out Lando tried his hardest with a deserved P2 at his home race.
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Liked by mclaren, f1 & 1,002,485 others.
yourusename mom, i got invited to the silverstone grand prix.. still lowkey in disbelief like wtf.. me?? anyways, tysm mclaren 🩷 enjoy my lovely film camera dump raaaah.
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user harry looking fine as always😍
user y/n and lando finest friends
wroetoshaw whos the first fella hes fit
- yourusername he has a girlfriend..
user i can imagine y/n just walking around taking pictures of everything and everyone 😭😭😭
user i almost melted when they came on the screen
- user me too 😭 forgot i was watching f1 for a second
wroetoshaw i still think i shouldve worn my ferrari outfit #hater
- yourusername youd be sticking out like a sore thumb youre lucky i stopped you #loser #youalmostworepajamapants
user y/n looked so good there 😍
user i LIVE for y/n and landos friendship
faithlouisak i cant believe you chose him over me..
- yourusername im sorry bae.. next time im taking u
faithlouisak finest woman out there
calfreezy wtf fake friends.. theburntchip are you seeing what im seeing ???
- theburntchip bunch of fakies😔
holy what a yap fest lmfao please someone REQUEST something 😭 cause this is too plain.. !
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lucidpillows · 1 year ago
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it was nice knowing you, Taylor Zakhar Perez
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calculatedklown · 6 months ago
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It's completely baffling that Gortash is the only one of the chosen three with whom we don't get to have any dialogue regarding the information we uncover about him.??
Spoiler warning maybe lol
Like with Orin, we can mention her upbringing or the fact that she's a child of incest. Try to convince her that she's just been abused her whole life? Like obviously this changes nothing in the end. But it still matters that its mentioned.
Ketheric, we also can try and convince him to change his ways. Mention his wife, his religion, Isabelle. Literally mention everything we find out to try and convince him to turn a new leaf. Which also doesn't change any outcome. But I appreciate that its there.
But GORTASH??? We get absolutely NOTHING, it's absurd! It's baffling that we can't even touch on his backstory—like finding his parents,(possibly killing them depending on what you do) being sold to Raphael as a child, or the fact that he was scammed at one point. All the intriguing details we uncover about him lead to nowhere, and it's so annoying 😩
Like this isn't even just because I enjoy him as a character. It just seems like such a missed opportunity to find out more about him currently as a person!
The dialogue we encounter while trying to convince Ketheric and Orin reveals a profound insight into their true characters. Their reactions are telling and provide a unique perspective on who they are as individuals!
Ketheric fully recognizes the person he has become. He understands that he is a lost cause, fully acknowledging the wrongs he has committed and the irreparable damage he has caused. He accepts his fate without hesitation. Despite your words.
Orin lashes out in denial, and becomes completely manic (more so than her usual self). Completely baffled and distraught.
I want to know how Gortash would react if you brought up his parents or his childhood! It's a possibility he wouldn't be grateful if you slayed his parents; in fact, he would likely view any sympathy as a weakness and respond with anger or dismissiveness. Plus, we’ll never find out his true response to Durge after you say, “I always liked you.”
“Is that what you-”
I don't understand these missed opportunities with him?? Like I get keeping some ambiguity to an extent. Its why we will never get a clear answer into him and durges relationship…..BUT I WOULD LIKE A CRUMB OF HIM PLEASE!! I DONT EVEN NEED A KISSY SCENE! I JUST WANT ANY INSIGHT INTO HIS OWN OPINION ON HIS PAST IF ITS MENTIONED!
If you read all of this rambling…..please tell me what YOU think his possible response would be to any of these scenarios lmao please
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