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#Some of the songs have some pretty good spoilers ;)
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2024 Book Review #47 – City of Last Chances by Adrian Tchaikovsky
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This book was recommended to me by a few different people, and in any case I am generally a pretty big Tchaikovsky fan. So of course I’m only getting around to reading it now, however many months later. Having put it off so long for no good reason at all, I can say that the book is in fact very good. Not Tchaikovsky’s best work (that’s still Children of Time in a walk), but a good read and one that left me curious (if not exactly excited) about checking out the sequel.
The story takes place in Illmar, the eponymous City of Last Chances – scarred and oppressed, tyrannized by cursed dukes and conquering imperialists, built upon a dangerous and unreliable route to other worlds and forever attracting the sort of people with no better options available to them. While the book has any number of characters, it’s really the city itself that is the star of the story – a story of how the theft of an imperial magistrate’s ward before he makes an experimental voyage through the gateway in the woods leads to a whole series of byzantine intrigues and bloody misadventures, culminating in an abortive revolution against the Pallseen who occupy and rule them. Which in one sense is an absolutely massive spoiler and in another just feels like stating an inevitability that was obvious from the first chapter.
The book was apparently quite heavily marketed as harking back to the whole New Weird trend of a decade or two ago – marketing that is lived up to wholly and entirely. The whole book absolutely drips with Mieville and Vandermeer. The oblique worldbuilding, the mundane day-to-day life built around the opportunities and inconveniences of some intrusion of the sublime, the awkward intersection of ancient magic and industrial bureaucracy, and so on, and so forth. The Reproach in particular feels very Area X (or very Roadside Picnic, as you prefer), but in general the city feels like absolutely nothing so much as Bas-Lag with the weirdness dial turned down from an 11 to a 5 or 6.
It’s a real triumph of the book, I think, that the world genuinely feels vast and strange even beyond the points where it matters to the story - that all the little asides and the ways something affects a certain character feel like just small parts of something far grander and more uncanny than anyone can hope to understand. Maybe I’m just painfully tired of rpg-system worldbuilding, but it’s an effect I dearly love.
Much like Bas-Lag, Ilmar is very clearly a magical fantasy city going through a magical fantasy 19th century industrial revolution (instead of steam engines its demonic slave labor contracted and imported from the Kings Below). The meat of the book is playing into the whole tradition of the idealistic, virtuous but tragic liberal revolution – 1848 in Berlin or Vienna, the June Days and Commune in Paris, Warsaw a dozen different times, Les Mis. You know the type. Students singing patriotic old songs, workers rising up against class oppression, ‘revolutionaries’ who are mostly cowardly nobles pining after lost privileges and criminal syndicate putting on airs being caught flat-footed by events. You can probably tell the basic story in your sleep. But for such a venerable genre, this book's honestly probably the best rendition of ‘fantasy 1848’ I can recall. Something which won it my instant affection.
The other thing the book just overwhelming shares with the Mieville’s Bas-Lag books is a very keen sense of the necessity of revolution combined with an extreme cynicism towards anyone who might actually carry it out. The university students are sincere believers, and also naive sheep the narrative views with condescension (at best). The professional revolutionaries are all power-grabbing hypocrites who have wrapped themselves in the flag. The workers syndicates have a real sense of solidarity among themselves, and also none at all to the demon slaves that are used and broken powering the mills and factories. And so on. The overall thrust of the book is a tragedy not in the sense of railing against the inevitable, but in the sense that triumph and revolution were absolutely possible – indeed plausible – but for the flaws and frailities of the revolutionaries who might have accomplished it.
Not to say that it's misanthropic – the book is very humane towards the vast majority of its POVs. Of which there are enough for ‘vast majority’ to be a meaningful term. It was something like 130 pages in before any character got a second chapter through their eyes, a feat I had previously only seen in Malazan – and that’s not including the chorus chapters which just give a half-doze vignettes from across the city. But yes, most characters (even the ones who are really just viscerally repulsive) are shown through their own eyes as someone who is at least understandable, if not particularly sympathetic. The sheer size of the cast in a 500 page book mean that no one character or set gets that many chapters from their perspective (you could easily have written as long a book about roughly the same events with half or less of the cast), but some of the dynamics that are very lightly touched on are just incredibly compelling. Its enough to make you wish this was a series that would ever get any fanfiction written about it, really.
Given the way the book is so deeply concerned with oppression and violence on the basis of culture, class, and nation – imperial occupiers, native population, refugees and immigrants used and scapegoated by both – it is kind of fascinating that this is a world where misogyny and (possibly? Not very explored, the only example of a queer relationship we see is hardly going to be concerned by normative society) homophobia just flatly don’t exist. Which would be less interesting if it was unusual, really – the same could be said about very nearly every recent sci fi or fantasy book on the same lines I can recall. Interesting because it is very much not the case in Melville’s stuff – the cultural impact of Ancillary Justice continues to echo down the years, I guess. So yes the imperial police inspector will extort sex out of a brothel owner in exchange for not stringing up the entire workforce for peripheral involvement with the resistance, but also this is entirely gender-neutral. Something very modern about how oppression is imagined relative to the ‘90s or ‘00s (or just a different genre of self-consciously feminist novel a few book shelves to the left).
But yeah, great book, I am compelled. No idea where the sequel would be going, but will probably hunt it down sooner rather than later.
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cybersteal · 4 months
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✨𝒅𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒎𝒆𝒓𝒔🌠
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alangdorf · 1 year
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Ok so I know I’ve taken a few liberties here with gijinka-fying the Rampaging Doomers, of all characters, but hear me out: self-recognition through the other (derogatory). Not just a reminder of the part of himself he doesn’t like to acknowledge but also a near-perfect replication of him at his worst (Magolor EX, specifically). They know enough about Doomer and Ancient societies and his situation with the Crown to get right to the heart of his insecurities, which makes them really effective at bullying him. Also like. Extended family judging you for your life choices lol
Anyway, included the lines this time cause I’m really proud of the composition but a bit disappointed with how the coloring turned out. It did however help me pinpoint what I’d like to improve on, which is my coloring/shading. I think I get into details too quickly to the detriment of the piece as a whole and I also think the way I shade doesn’t have enough contrast and doesn’t take light sources into account very well. I just need to do some painting studies sometime and that will fix me, I swear
#art#digital#kirby#magolor#kirby gijinka#magolor epilogue spoilers#rampaging doomers#I always think they’re called flock of doomers because of the song title lol#I think I got most of my rambling out in the post body this time#wait design notes#ok so yeah they’re based off of Magolor EX rather than Traitor cause the color scheme fits pretty well#I didn’t wanna get rid of the head wings and upper tail feathers in favor of the gears so I just added a bunch of gears other places#& I thought the halos were cute lol#I did give them some piercings(?) to mimic the gear teeth there though and fun fact:#they each have a different number that happens to correspond to the number of tails each basic type of doomer has#perhaps a ranking system within the group or something#the outfits are a mixture of elements of Greco-Roman and E/SE Asian fashion inspired by like architectural and musical details in epilogue#which was a bit harrowing given I was worried about that reading as orientalism but I think it turned out ok#also I know the purple to yellow gradient on their wings is not that warm in canon but who am I to refuse a good sunset gradient lol#I forgot about the pieces of the appy slice when I was sketching and I briefly considered sticking them in their mouths#but figured maybe that would be a bit too weird (admittedly Magolor Soul already goes full Mouthful Mode so there would be precedent)#so imagine they just have them in a pocket somewhere#oh also sorry you have to zoom in to see some details especially in the colored version; I have an ongoing problem with scale#I’ve always thought it’s really interesting how Mags’ reaction at the start of this fight is like ‘Oh come on; not *these* guys’
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welcometogrouchland · 9 months
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I support the "Batman was unfairly biased to Stephanie for XYZ reasons" crowd so strongly bc DC claims that Bruce is a master planner who is able to understand anyone's psychology but he didn't realize that literally every single one of Steph's problems as a teenager would've been solved by her joining a shitty punk band. If he couldn't figure that much out then he didn't understand her for a minute
#ramblings of a lunatic#PLEASE TALK TO ME I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS ON STEPHANIE IN A SHITTY PUNK BAND#her bandmates have turned into ocs it's stage 5 at this point boys#anyway what is steph dealing w/ pre-52 as spoiler that got her in hot water?#1. the anger issues. easily fixed by her getting to scream about beating her dad to death without actually doing it#2. nobody fucking listens to her (including batman). well when u are playing music ppl are definitely fucking listening#3. has no non-batfam friends and thus ends up feeling abandoned almost every time she gets kicked out of the group. bandmates are friends!#don't like being in your shitty house? go to your band mates house and jam!#need to articulate the anger issues in a way that doesn't disturb your frazzled paranoid boyfriend? write angsty songs!#also I do genuinely have a lot of thoughts on how music was applied to Stephanie's character and what it tells us about her#like she loved it. clearly. and she was GOOD at it too. steph is constantly perceived as a screw up and has pretty low opinion of herself#piano was something she could take pride in. in i believe issue 113 of tims og robin series-#-tim is AMAZED at her playing all these years later. so is nocturna a few issues earlier#there's a standard visual language in comics for good or bad music- notation drawn in either shaky or smooth lines#stephs are all smooth and golden. she's good even after all these years of not practicing#but all she says to tim after he compliments her is ''i used to be better...'' SHE SEES THE WORST IN HERSELF AND HER ABILITIES#SHE DESERVES A CHANCE TO FEEL GOOD AT AT LEAST ONE THING LIKE SHE FINALLY GOT TO AS BATGIRL IN HER SOLO#and onto my final point: dinah has several times expressed some degree of fondness/admiration for steph. steph has likewise trained w dinah#and thinks she's cool as fuck. which makes sense. bc dinah is cool as fuck#and what is dinah in??? that's right. a band#steph should join dinahs band for her mental health. this has been an essay#stephanie brown#spoiler dc#dc batgirl#batgirls#<- since that series re-canonized pianist steph!! bless them!
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bmpmp3 · 2 months
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the really beautiful landscape/skyscape animation in makoto shinkai's works tends to be the big thing i see focused on and that is understandable and deserved like the weather and lighting effects are unREAL but i do think we should also appreciate how absolute insane the plotlines of his original movies get. at least two movies with in universe catastrophes with major ecological implications. the guns and explosions. theres that one movie i havent seen yet with the guy who turns into a chair (?)
#just watched weathering with you. it was really good. REALLY good#i remember when it came out people were saying it was better than your name. but now it seems the general opinion switched?#your name changed my brain chemistry and outlook on life. i think weathering with you may do the same#so to me i think they're like on pare with eachother. i dont know if i can choose which is my fav now LOL#they are sisters to me..... sisters to me...... quick review below watch out for spoilers#i dont think i'll be too detailed but i do also just recommend watching it its a great movie#I DID like the soundtrack in your name a BIT better like the score had a few more hooks for me and i loved all the insert songs#while in wwy i liked the last three inserts but the first couple didnt really grab me. but its all radwimps so its all good LOL#the side characters in wwy were so good tho like i loved all the cast so much#of course i adored the main characters of your name and wwy both. but the side cast in wwy ruled i think i'll remember them for a long time#the taki jumpscare was also great. my boy was here. my boy was here. just for a minute#i also adored how unhinged the main character of wwy was. hodaka was like. a bit unwell? HJKDJHKFD i thought it was great#weird and quiet but desperately a bit violent in a way that i think was very relatable#i also loved the like. message? sorry that sounds sappy but i liked that like the story was kind of like#coming to hina who is working so hard and forced by herself and circumstance to grow up so early and sacrifice so much#and grabbing her by the shoulders and telling her YOU CAN LIVE!!! YOU CAN HAVE FUN!!! ITS OKAY!!!!!!#i think it was so sweet and such a strong sentiment. wonderful movie. also there was guns and i was so scared#i think that might actually by why i love how high stakes the plots get in these movies like the character design and personalities are so#real and down to earth so when you go to the beautiful planetary skyscapes and also the exploding vehicals you get like so in awe or scared#it does also make me laugh tho now thinking about the your name nendos. you can just barely make nendos of them. you cannot make a nendo of#hodaka. hina maybe. but not hodaka. he is. some guy. the most some guy. visually at least. mentally hes got. something happening <3#loved him so much. hes normal. hes normal. oh they did make some popup parades thats cute#altho it is a bit funny looking. that is just like two normal teenagers JHKLDSHKFDLSafdjksd#anyway next up i'll probably watch the chair movie. ive heard a couple songs from it and they were pretty good so im excited#it also makes me realize i need to watch more of his back catalogue other than 5cm.... he has way more movies than i remembered#i hope someday he gets to make the yuri movie he wanted to. it would be unreal. huge beautiful skys. ecological disasters. girls kissing#oh i hope he gets to do it one day..... one day.....#EDIT: WAIT THEY DID MAKE A NENDO OF HODAKA AND HINA.... LIKE FULL NENDOS NOT EVEN PETITE.....#HODAKA REALLY DOES JUST LOOK LIKE SOME DUDE.... AWESOME
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jinjeriffic · 8 months
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DCxDP Prophecy Universe Part 2
Part 1
Damian glared at the envelope. He and Father were in the process of analysing the letter for any signs of toxins, explosives or other traps. Obviously he wasn’t fool enough to open a missive from a questionable source without taking precautions. So far, all their scans had come up empty. Literally. The letter was defying all their attempts at chemical or spectroscopic testing, x-ray and magnetic resonance scans were inconclusive, it defied all properties of ordinary matter. It was frustrating. It was vexing. He was blaming magic.
For all intents and purposes, the letter looked like ordinary paper, with an ordinary wax seal, bearing the initials CW. The looping handwriting addressing it to Damian was precise and neat. Swiping the surface of the letter for chemical traces yielded no results. When Damian had tried to cut off a corner of the paper for analysis it had resisted all attempts, including a laser and a diamond headed cutting tool. Damian’s only satisfaction was that when Father had grunted and taken over the task from Damian, he had no more success than his son. As if Damian didn’t know how to perform the standard array of tests!
It certainly didn’t help that his siblings wouldn’t stop their incessant chattering!
“I’m just saying, ghosts wouldn’t be the weirdest thing we’ve encountered, Red. I’m not sure it would even make my personal Top 5.”
It seemed gossip among heroes travelled faster than the speed of light.
“Really, Nightwing? Ghosts? It’s far more likely to be a meta with something to hide. Or a few screws loose.” Damian could practically hear the eyeroll in Drake’s voice “And since when do ghosts act as glorified mailmen?”
“I don’t know Red, since when do aliens pretend to be Kansas farmboys? C’mon, we deal with magic users all the time!”
“And lets not forget people coming back from the dead” Red Hood interjected over the open comm line.
“Magic is just science we don’t understand yet. Any sufficiently analysed magic becomes indistinguishable from science!”
“B, a little help here?”
“Hn” Father straightened up from his position at the lab table “Oracle, any progress on clearing up the footage from Robin’s mask?”
Grayson threw up his hands with a frustrated huff while Drake smirked.
“The program is almost finished rendering. Whatever scrambler they used did a real number on the video quality. I’m surprised the audio is as clear as it is.” Oracle replied.
“Hn. And the isotope tracer on the money?”
“Sorry B, no hits on the local sensors. Wherever the guy went it’s either outside Gotham or shielded somehow.” she said, mildly frustrated.
“Maybe it’s ghost magiiiiic” Drake sing-songed. Grayson lightly cuffed the back of his head, to which the former Robin responded with a firm shove. Their interaction quickly devolved into a childish tussle.
Damian gave an annoyed huff. “Don’t you two imbeciles have anything better to do?”
“Aww, we’re just here to look out for our baby brother!” Nightwing teased.
“Yeah, we gotta make sure your ghost encounter didn’t leave any lasting psychological damage!” Red Robin added.
Before Damian could retaliate for their needling, Oracle chimed in. “Uh, guys? You’re going to want to see this. Most of the footage was corrupted beyond repair, but I was able to pull some partial stills and, well…” she threw a handful of pictures up on the screen. There was artifacting marring them, but parts of the stranger were visible in each of them. Oracle magnified one that had a pretty good view of his face.
“Holy shit” Drake whispered.
Damian frowned. “What?”
“Dami, he looks like you. Just… older.” Grayson said softly.
“What are you talking about?” Damian snapped.
“Disregard the pale colouring for a second. The nose, the chin… he looks like you if you had a growth spurt,” Drake wrinkled his nose “and went through puberty.”
The commlines erupted into chaos. 
“Wait, wait, wait,” Spoiler exclaimed “are you telling me there’s an older version of Robin running around Gotham?!”
“Copy?” Batgirl inquired.
“Don’t tell me Talia cooked up Demon Brat 2.0!”
“Given that he looks older it’s more likely version 0.1 if anything,” Drake snarked, “though there’s the possibility of artificially accelerated growth rates…”
Damian had had enough. “Tt. You are ignoring the obvious - if this is some kind of supernatural entity it likely copied aspects of my appearance in an attempt to engender feelings of familiarity.” he said haughtily, pushing down the uncomfortable churning in his stomach. There was no way Mother would replace him with a cheap copy. She couldn’t! “Besides, the creature has obvious powers and neither of my bloodlines has any trace of the meta gene.”
“That’s ignoring the ghostly elephant in the room.” Grayson chimed in, “Maybe it’s a dead ancestor?”
Drake gave their older brother an annoyed look “Even a time travelling descendant from the future is more likely than that. And delivering a ‘prophecy’ to boot?”
Oracle pulled up an aged up picture of Damian next to the stranger’s, highlighting several reference points. “On closer inspection, there’s a couple of discrepancies. The cheekbones for one - Robin definitely takes after his mother, while our mystery meta looks more like… well… Robin’s grandmother on the paternal side.” she finished hesitantly. “B?”
They turned to look at Batman, who had remained silent during the whole exchange. If they hadn’t known him so well they would have thought him unaffected, but the tightening around his mouth betrayed his agitation.
“There’s no use in pointless speculation until we have more data to work from,” he growled, “Oracle, look for any reports of a meta matching the target. Since our regular methods have failed to yield results, I will contact the JLD about running tests on the letter.” He turned to Drake, “Red Robin, see what you can find on recent League activities. If this is another scheme by Ra’s or Talia we need to know about it.”
“The last thing we need is more demon spawn running around!” Red Hood groaned over the comms.
Damian was furious. This was absurd! To even indulge the possibility that that creature was in any way related to him was making him feel like he had swallowed battery acid. He was the Demon’s Heir! He was not replaceable! There was only one thing to do.
“Robin? Stop!”
He ignored his Father’s shout. He stomped over to the lab table, snatched up the envelope and broke the seal.
Nothing happened.
He unfolded the paper and saw the same handwriting that had been on the outside.
Brother of blood, brother of soul
Never buried but already mourned
In lightning and ice the scorned child returned
To strike down the Demon’s Head
With all that Death earned
Damian’s hand shook. He reread the lines over and over again, refusing to comprehend. He could feel his Father standing behind him, scrutinising the letter as well.
“Son…”
Suddenly, the paper burst into green flames, going up into smoke that dissipated unnaturally quickly.
Silence reigned for a few moments. Then…
“Well that was needlessly melodramatic” Nightwing remarked.
Part 3
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diazisms · 5 months
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hello i humbly offer another installment of my "this was supposed to be a text post but it spiraled into a short coda oneshot" series.
hen and eddie talk about buck's coming out. also today's wordle is not lover i wouldn't spoil it and lover has already been used as a wordle. it was for the themes.
“Did you know? About Buck, I mean? Did you suspect at all?”
Hen looks up at him and puts her phone down, he gets a wordle spoiler when he looks at her screen. Lover. Got it. 
“Him being queer?”
“I think he identifies as bisexual.”
“Okay,” Hen says, and Eddie watches her face flit through a complicated series of emotions before landing on something fond and knowing that makes heat crawl up his spine. “You wanna sit down?”
“This doesn’t feel like a sit down conversation, it’s not a big deal, I’m just asking if you knew—”
“Eddie,” she cuts him off. Her smile is kind and gentle and Eddie gets the quick building feeling he should’ve stayed in the bunk room. “Sit down.”
He sits. 
Hen pushes her glasses up the bridge of her nose and tilts her head a little as she smiles at him. The head tilt reminds him of Buck because he finds little pieces of Buck everywhere. He’s in the song on the radio in Eddie’s truck on the way to work and he’s in Christopher’s English homework because the stories Buck used to tell him when he was little enough to ask for them influenced his creative writing. He’s in Eddie’s kitchen even when he isn’t because Buck got him a set of rainbow silicon spatulas because they were a buy one get one free deal. 
A copy of Buck’s loft keys on Eddie’s keychain, his name in the calendar that he wrote himself take out w/ buck ! no skipping in his messy, nearly illegible scrawl. 
But Eddie can read it because he doesn’t think there’s a universe out there where he doesn’t understand Buck down to the chicken scratch. 
“I didn’t know, not for sure. It wasn’t ever something I thought about at length, either. I’ve mentioned it to Karen once or twice and there have been times where she’d shoot me a smirk from across Bobby and Athena’s backyard at something Buck said, but it’s not something I’ve ever discussed. That doesn’t feel right.” 
“But you knew?” 
“I wasn’t surprised.”
He fidgets with a rubber band someone left on the table. He wants to ask more. Needs to know what made her realize it in Buck. If she sees the same in him. 
Eddie’s never really thought about it. Or, that’s not quite true. He knows, in a way. That something’s never been quite right. That he’s never felt for women what he’s been told he’s supposed to feel. 
Dating isn’t supposed to feel like a performance, he doesn’t think. Nobody else seems to think it is. 
He likes the sex for the most part. Figured that was enough to carry it. Sex feels good but then again he’s pretty sure sex always feels good when both people want it. It’s not like it’s some sort of burden to eat his girlfriends out but there’s something missing. He likes making them feel good but he doesn’t like how high pitched their moans are of the soft sighs that spill out of their mouths. There are soft tits where hard chests should be and it doesn’t. 
It doesn’t feel right. The sex is good, it's fine, he'll take it, but—
Love shouldn’t be just about sex. Eddie doesn’t want it to be. 
“Did you ever assume something about—” he cuts himself off but Hen sees right through him anyway. Maybe lesbians have some sort of psychic third eye that lets them see beyond the performative exterior he puts on. He tries not to squirm as she looks at him. 
“About you?” she asks, and the world doesn’t stop spinning or start spinning backwards or tilt on its axis. Eddie thinks it should. It’s the least the earth could do, honestly. 
He swallows. 
“Yeah.”
Hen hums and Eddie can tell she’s trying to gather her thoughts and form them into sentences that won’t send him running for the hills. Being—this doesn’t feel like something to run from, though. Not so much anymore. Maybe a few years ago, maybe when he first got to LA and his parents' words and their bitterness were still stuck to his skin. When he still felt like he wasn’t good enough. Not for his son, not for Shannon, not for himself. 
He feels good enough now. And he thinks he’d like to fall for someone the way Buck seems to be falling for Tommy. Except he’s really fucking scared the person he’s falling for is—
Well. 
Buck. 
It shouldn’t come as a surprise, and it doesn’t, not really, it’s the kind of thought that sits quietly in the back of your mind and waits for you to uncover it. 
Buck came out and it uncovered itself. 
Buck is bi. Buck dates men. 
Buck could date him. And he isn’t.
That’s the crux of it all. Eddie was drunk and Buck’s arm was around his shoulder and he felt lightheaded, couldn't stop smiling so hard his cheeks hurt the next day. Bubblier than the champagne. Floaty. It wasn’t even a new feeling, not with Buck. 
He makes him so fucking happy. 
Even through hell, Buck makes him happy. That’s love, probably. Definitely. Eddie tries not to think about it too hard otherwise he might have to go see Dr. Salazar again, and he really doesn’t feel like explaining this to the woman who diagnosed him with repression. 
Getting an I told you so from his sisters would be one thing. 
“Do you want me to be honest?”
“Yes,” he says, far too quick and clipped and awkward. He smiles tightly. 
“Yeah. I thought you were, actually. When you got to the station, you wouldn’t talk about Christopher’s other parent. Even in the beginning, you barely talking about him. I figured an army guy from Texas probably wasn’t used to being out. And then you weren’t gay, so I assumed you were just being a scorpio and not letting anyone in. But you let Buck in.”
“Yeah.”
“I didn’t—there’s no bet about it. About the two of you. I don't think anyone would be surprised, but no one talks about it. That’s not the kind of thing you gossip about. But, yeah. People were surprised when the mysterious partner you wouldn’t talk about was your wife, and not a husband.”
“Do you think I’m in love with Buck?”
“That’s not my place to tell you.”
“Hen. You’re my friend, and the only other queer person I know and trust enough to ask this to. I can’t exactly go ask him that question, and I don’t know who else to talk to. Do you think I’m in love with Buck?”
“Yes.”
Eddie’s exhale is shaky. 
“Yeah. Me, too.” 
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stephreynaart · 2 months
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i'm so sad you ship billford.... im not gonna lecture you i just. sighs. i love your art so much this is really upsetting. :(((
We gonna have this conversation again?
At this point go take it up with Alex, cause it’s pretty much canon.
BOOK OF BILL SPOILERS BELOW
It’s REALLY hard to ignore all the language surrounding Bill’s relationship with Ford and how he pursues him, he follows the dating advice he gives in the book to a T
- Leaving dead rats/mice for Ford
- Ford is the only “partner” that Bill is openly vulnerable with and gives him some insight to his past and his experience (also referring to him as a partner)
- The “Love Cage” advice he gives, where he said go trap your date and sing them a song. And if you remember, Bill traps Ford in the Fearamid and sings to him “We’ll Meet Again”, which was a song written for WWII soldiers who were away from their lovers
“I’m Your Puppet” by James & Bobby Purify that Ford gets in his head, a love song, that also places Ford in his role in the relationship.
THE FLIRTING “you can call me anything but late to dinner”, “I think I’m starting to like you” and saying the same thing then saying “jinx”. GET A ROOM
Both got jealous when the other thinks they’re with someone else. Ford thinking Bill’s “inspiring another scientist” when he doesn’t see Bill for a few weeks, and Bill calling Fiddleford a “third wheel”.
Then when they break it off, Bill goes on a sad drunken rampage. Which you don’t do for someone who you don’t at least care about, especially not someone who’s just a friend
Bill gives Ford 3 days to turn the portal on and asks himself “What was I, a saint? And why did I do it- some misplaced sentimentality”
Even Mabel basically said Bill has a thing for Ford “you’re like a super needy ex” “go crush on someone else’s uncle”
They were definitely more than friends, from what I see it was mostly one-sided on Bill’s part.
Maybe Ford did feel something, it was definitely a relationship that made him feel good, more in tune with his brain and body, and gave him a big boost of confidence. He went to Bill for comfort when he was stressed and vented to him about stuff. Bill made Ford happy…while it was good anyway.
Was this a healthy relationship? FUCK NO!
Bill was mentally and physically abusive, manipulative, and possessive (LITERALLY). He spiked Ford’s drink after Ford said no to having one and got him fucked up. Bill took Ford’s body on a joyride and did horrible things to Ford that we see in the pictures and thing we DONT see in the video. All to make him comply and get the portal running. Calling Ford his PROPERTY.
But it’s a good story of overcoming an abusive relationship, which is great representation tbh, Ford is happier and has his family to love him now.
Normally Alex is great at leaving things up to interpretation, but I can’t ignore the intentional and not at all subtle way he depicted Bill and Ford’s relationship. There’s even seeds of it in the interview with Hana and TGFF
Go take it up with Hirsch, cause I’m just using what he gave me
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terrythemerry · 10 months
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I just watched Wish (2023) and it made me realize something kind of sad about Disney’s treatment of villains.
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So Disney has a long history of villainy from the OG Evil Queen who is willing to murder a girl just for being pretty to the misguided like Auto thinking he’s protecting humanity in Wall-E. They are mean, jealous, prideful, vain, and many relish in just being the worst of the worst. However every now and then we get a glimpse of more complexity. Zootopia’s Bellwether dealing with years of racism and mistreatment, Gantu trying to stop what he thinks is a monster in Lilo and Stitch, Up’s Muntz being a heroic explorer before paranoia consumed him, etc. The thing that makes me sad about these villains is that not one of them has ever had a chance at redemption or change in Disney’s eyes and nowhere is that sadder to me than their latest villain, King Magnifico.
(Spoilers below)
King Magnifico is the magical founder of a utopian society that accepts people of all races, religions, and backgrounds. Who created this wonderful place after what is heavily implied to be a violent invasion destroyed his homeland when he was but a child. This past trauma led him to study magic and become a powerful sorcerer so that nothing could hurt him or the people he cared about ever again. His magic is a protection that he extends to all who choose to live in the city. The city is vibrant with a colorful community full of artisans, musicians, and dancers. He takes no taxes from them, but does take their one true wish upon joining this society.
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When given these wishes it is understood that he will ensure their safety and possibly grant them one day. Something important to note about the physical manifestations of the wishes is that they give off a warm and comforting aura as they represent some of the purest parts of a person’s soul. Magnifico has been surrounding himself with this magical comfort for a very very long time by himself and I don’t think it’s unfair to say he has become addicted to their presence. The wishes are giving him a magical comfort through the kind souls within them, a feeling he could’ve probably also gotten if he had spent more time with his people.
It doesn’t look like he ever really got the chance to commune with his people properly because somehow the society kicked off on his wish granting abilities. People had to give him their wishes if they wanted them granted and eventually the ones that he couldn’t grant in good conscience or out of fear started adding up so he began locking them away. Keeping them safe so no harm came to the people. The rare occasions that anyone else interacts with these wishes is during wish granting ceremonies that the people are borderline rabid for. With good reason, it is their souls they’re thirsting for after all even if they don’t really know it.
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However, Magnifico clearly doesn’t see it that way. He sees it as he’s given these people a wonderful safe haven from the horrors of the outside world where they can be whoever they want to be, do what they want to do, make what they want to make, and still all they see in him is a tool to fastpass to something else they want even more than the peace he’s given them.
This is clearly shown early on, before any of his evil behavior starts to take root, in relation to his assistants. We get a expo dump after the first song telling us that Asha wants to become one of his assistant to increase the odds of her grandfather’s wish being granted as there is a correlation between past assistants and having wishes granted. Something important here is that there have clearly been many assistants, suggesting that it’s a revolving door position without really explaining why. Who would want to keep finding assistants over and over again, when really you should find someone who could do the job long term right? Well we get to find out the likely reason when Asha steps up for the role.
When Asha comes to interview for his assistant position he sees she is nervous, he tries to calm her down, and he even manages to relate to her through fond memories of her kindly father who he clearly knew. After seeing her true resolve to do good he decides to trust her with something few people in the entire kingdom get to see, the vault of wishes. To which Asha doesn’t even hesitate to ask, after politely being told not to prior, if he’ll grant her grandfather’s wish.
Magnifico is blatantly stricken by her request, sadly remarking that most people at least wait a few months before doing so a.k.a pretend to be interested in helping him rather than trying to use him to grant a wish. This is likely why the assistant job is a revolving door. Magnifico tries to find someone who he thinks will truly and selflessly fulfill the role only to discover time and again that people are just using it to get direct access to him to ask for a wish. Then he can’t trust their true intentions anymore and moves them along.
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After Asha makes her request he does take the time to look at her grandfather’s wish but dismisses it as too dangerous because it is the vague desire to inspire the next generation. Clearly we as the audience know that her grandfather means to inspire them to do good, but we have to remember Magnifico has seen the worst of society. He has seen the darkest wishes and desires of mankind and survived them. He brushes Asha off telling her she’s too young to understand, which is honestly true. She’s lived her entire life cloistered in peace and comfort thanks to him and the rules he has made. She has never had to know war, strife, or hardship thanks to him, yet she doubts his decision without understanding the trauma that guides it. This is what I believe pushes Magnifico into his villain arc, something that I don’t think we’ve ever really witnessed in a Disney movie.
Usually a villain already is the villain by the time the film rolls around, even the twist villains. Lotso had already been deliberately sentencing other toys to torture. Prince Hans was already planning to murder his way to a throne. Evelyn was already plotting her revenge. Magnifico wasn’t though. He was the hero. He had saved his wife and a whole city’s worth of people from whatever drove them from the mainlands. He wasn’t physically abusing/mistreating people like Gaston even if he was vainly basking in their adoration.
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When Asha pushes him on the wishes he pulls back from her, identifying her in his mind as a threat and treats her as one. He dismisses her and tells her that her family’s wishes will never be granted by him, but he will still keep them safe as he has been doing. Essentially meaning nothing will change for her from what it has been. You know a happy loving existence of complete acceptance and wholesome family life or as Asha interprets it, a fate worse than death.
His interaction with Asha triggers him, as she’s pushed at the flaws in his reasoning for holding onto the wishes. The flaws are true, but his mind is clouded by fear of a lack of control, likely stemming from the horrors he witnessed in his childhood when he had no control. He also likely has a bit of an addiction to the warm fuzzies that the wishes give on top of his fears. While he’s ruminating on that some massive wave of magic blows through the kingdom and messes with the thing he’s already stressed beyond reason about, the wishes.
Magnifico frantically searches for any answer, even considering a dangerous tome of forbidden magic that he knows is trouble before his wife manages to talk him down.
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The fact that he could even be talked down rather than ignoring her outright shows that Magnifico does have good in him. He’s just reacting out of a genuine panic. His panic is only worsened by huge mob continuing to beg him for wishes in exchange for doing what should be the selfless act of defending their kingdom from what is essentially perceived as an attack. Not having any faith left in his people he turns back to the evil book to give him the key to stopping this perceived attack.
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Just to be clear King Magnifico goes to the big bad evil book not to gain more power for funsies, but to try to find a way to stop a perceived threat. Everything he does from this point on, such as threatening his wife, can no longer be fairly tied to him, because as the movie repeatedly tells us he is under the EVIL book’s influence. His wife even looks through the same book to try and see if there is a way to break the sway she knows it has over him, but says she can’t because the EVIL book said no.
Yada yada yada and Magnifico is sealed inside a magic mirror and smugly told to rot in the dungeon by his previously loving wife.
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Seriously?! What the heck?! This guy was the perfect candidate for rehabilitation. He wasn’t flawless, but he wasn’t a murderous psycho like most of the other Disney villains. Disney loves to preach kindness, acceptance, and good will with their heroes, but never does it allow the message of change.
I was shocked going back through the catalogue and slowly realizing none of their villains, regardless of how tragic their origins are, are ever truly allowed a second chance. The hero may offer it, but the baddy never is truly expected to change or reform. Which is honestly super messed up to me. People make mistakes. Some can be small/insignificant, but some are big and do hurt people sometimes. That doesn’t mean they can’t change for the better.
Now I’m not saying every villain is redeemable or good, it’s just a bit surprising that for all the messages of kindness and acceptance we haven’t really gotten forgiveness in 100 years. Seeing the “bad guy’s punishment” just deeply bothered me this time. Probably because so much of the bad that Magnifico does is clearly a trauma response and as a punishment for not acting appropriately to said response he gets sentenced to eternity is magical cell.
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spiderfunkz · 5 months
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hi! i’d love to know abt your fav headcanon(s) for tasm!peter and maybe a little oneshot of said headcanon(s)?
peter parker falls in love HARDDDDD!! i love him and his nerdy ass like aaaaghhhhhh. he's so cutesy and skrunkly i just wanna throw a rock at him 💕
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peter parker is the type of person to go head over heels when he likes someone!! the type of person to steal a glance every time you're not looking. the type of person to secretly hope he'd get partnered up with you during class. the type of person to practice in front of the mirror before finally talking to you.
he's the type of person to notice every little thing about you. the pins on your bag of your favorite artists? he can name five songs. your favorite flowers? he walks past the flower shop every morning, hoping to buy you some one day. the way you always have that one mood ring on your finger, he finds it adorable.
he goes so flustered whenever you catch him glancing at you. his face turns all red and he starts giggling actually, your probably the reason he skips to school everyday, hands in pockets, twirling around in pure joy and excitement.
he'll brag to his friends on how he talked to you when in reality it was him saying happy birthday and you replying with a thank you along with a smile that surely gave him a cavity.
to summarize it up. peter parker doesn't just like someone. he loves them. pure admiration, adoration, infatuation, smitten. you're the light in his heart, the butterfly in a field of wildflowers, the red tulip in a field of white tulips.
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peter has liked you for a while now.
it was a long day of classes, he could've just skipped but aunt may found out he was doing that too much and got pretty mad. besides, it's just one more class. a class he never really had to try in. should be easy right?
yes, but no.
you just switched classes to biology. sitting in the only empty chair, just two chairs away from peter. he saw you, and that's when he knew.
you were never late, unlike peter. every time he comes in you're already there, smiling awkwardly at the situation as mrs. moore lectured him. but what's the point? peter wasn't listening, he was too busy figuring out what emotion was on your mood ring, and spoiler alert! it was love.
it took him a lot of convincing and reassurance from gwen, but he finally got the courage to talk to you. not about how the weather is, or the same old "did you do the _ assignment yet?". he was going to ask you out on a totally friends-only, platonic date ( that goes so well it will end up with you and him holding hands! ).
"hi!" peter smiled, his hand playing with his hair. "hey, peter." he seemed nervous, you were too.
"um, so, i was wondering if you.. would.." he looked everywhere but your eyes, "..that if we could, maybe, um.. hangout? together? if you want to. obviously, you don't have to but um-"
"no yeah, i would love to peter!" you smiled. was it hot? it felt hot, your face felt hot, does peter notice? he probably does.
peter's heart was racing through a field, it was winning first place. "okay, good- great! i could um. pick you up? i'll text you. you have my number right? i could just um- you know..." he played with the hem of his jacket.
you nodded, "yeah i do." — "okay, we could meetup somewhere.. maybe the park? is that boring? the cinema? anything you'd like, i'm fine with anything you know. or we could just.. hang.."
you smile, "sure."
"really?"
"yeah definitely, either one. or we could do all of them, i've got nothing to do." — "okay, that's super! super- cool.. super cool. i'll text you, is that okay?"
you nodded, "of course."
"okay, i um- i'll go now. i should go now. i'll see you? later?" peter asks.
"yeah okay!" you wave happily as he walks backwards towards the exit, nearly bumping into 2, no, 3 now, students.
"text me!" you yell out.
peter nodded eagerly.
he walks out, knowing gwen is not gonna hear the end of this.
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jgracie · 6 months
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I WANT IT ALL
masterlist | rules
❝ hellooo !! i absolutely in love with your works !! may i request percy with the song “i want it” all by lana del rey, specially this part of the lyrics:“do you think you'll kill for me one day?" / “yes of course I will, my darling” ? perhaps a mention of dark percy ? 😋 ❞ — 🦇
in which percy would kill for you one day
pairing slightly dark!percy jackson x reader
warnings house of hades spoilers? that’s when this is set, violence (percy bloodbends)
on the radio . . . i want it all (lana del rey)
After experiencing Tartarus together, you couldn’t help but notice how Percy changed. He used to always be able to crack a joke, even at the worst of situations, lightening the mood and raising your spirits. However, now he’s more… serious. Tartarus seemed to harden him up - his eyes, once a bright aquamarine colour, were now of a dark blue-green hue, like the depths of the ocean that even Poseidon wouldn’t venture
You still loved him with all of your heart. He was your precious boyfriend, after all. And besides, you probably changed a lot too after that. Anyone would if they were forced to hallucinate their boyfriend abandoning them like you did. The image the Arai had planted in your head that day, a curse sent your way by a girl you didn’t even know, haunted you. You never wanted to feel that alone and isolated again
Percy knew this. It was part of the reason why he became more protective, more territorial. Watching you wander Tartarus aimlessly, your voice cracking as you begged for his touch and being able to do nothing about it shattered his heart. After that experience, he vowed to never let you out of his sight 
The other members of the Argo II could tell that something had changed between you, too. However, they kept a safe distance, not wanting to interfere in case they made it worse, unable to even fathom what you must’ve gone through in Tartarus
For the most part, though, your relationship was good. Other than the nightmares and protectiveness, the two of you stayed the same iconic couple you are, and as time progressed, Percy felt himself becoming more relaxed, no longer needing to be by your side every second of every day
That was until the ship got attacked. You’d been having a couple days of pretty safe travel ever since you got out of Tartarus, and while you did enjoy simply being able to catch up with all your friends on a boat in the ocean, you should’ve known that something would come along to ruin this for you
It was early in the morning, and you were on watch duty along with Leo, who was manning the ship whilst adding some updates to Festus. The salty air made you think of Percy, and you found yourself suddenly longing for his touch, knowing how much he’d enjoy watching the sun rise over the horizon
“You can go get Percy if you want, Y/N, I’ll be fine here,” Leo mumbled. For someone who claims he’s better at understanding machines than people, he sure was good at reading your mind. Recently, you noticed he’d also been acting differently. According to Hazel, he found a girl he loved (NOT calypso guys don’t worry 🩷) while he’d gone missing, but for some reason he couldn’t bring her with him
You thanked him and were about to make your way to your boyfriend’s room when you suddenly heard a voice yell, “I will take revenge on you, wretched son of Poseidon!” You turned, finding yourself face-to-face with none other than the bane of Poseidon, Polybotes
“You think you can just leave Tartarus as you please? I, Polybotes, will make you pay!” The giant continued. Your feet seemed to be cemented to the ground as you stared at the giant, mouth open in a mix of shock and fear. He was supposed to be in Tartarus, how could he possibly get here? Of course you couldn’t have a moment of peace. Why were you stupid enough to think that maybe, just maybe, you could relax until actually having to fight Gaia herself? 
“Y/N, look out!” Leo yelled, pulling you out of your trance. But it was too late. The giant picked you up, his nails digging into your back, forming crescent shaped gashes. Your nose scrunched at the smell of him as he took a good look at you before laughing (his breath smelled even worse. You had to fight the urge to vomit all over him)
Tears welled up in your eyes. You were completely helpless, with no weapon on you and your limbs still aching from your time in Tartarus. This was it. This is how you’d die. The giant was squeezing you so tight you could barely breathe, black spots beginning to obscure your vision. You sent a quick prayer to your godly parent, asking them to keep your friends safe on the rest of this quest, before you succumbed to the darkness
The last thing you remember seeing is a flash of bright blue - the ocean
“Thank Gods you’re awake! We’re all so worried about you!” Hazel exclaimed as soon as your eyes were open. Looking around, you noticed you were in the makeshift infirmary section of the ship, bruises littering your body
You turned to face Hazel, your eyebrows furrowed, “what… happened?” You asked, trying to push your memories of the incident with Polybotes to the front of your mind, but ending up with nothing, “I remember I was captured by that giant, then I saw the water move, then… nothing.”
Hazel was suddenly incapable of holding eye contact with you, unsure if she should tell you what happened or not. In the end, she decided on the former, knowing you’d pull it out of Percy eventually if you had to
“The water moving was Percy’s doing. We all showed up after hearing the commotion and when he saw you in Polybotes’ clutches he went… kind of crazy. I’d never seen him like this before, Y/N, it was a little scary. He willed the water to move him up to Polybotes’ height and demanded he let you go. When he didn’t…” Hazel stopped for a second, shuddering. What did Percy do? After seeing the way he handled Akhlys in Tartarus, you knew there was a side of him that he kept buried deep inside. Did it come out again?
You placed a gentle hand on Hazel’s, giving her a kind smile which willed her to continue, “he started controlling Polybotes’ blood… he made him choke on his own blood, Y/N, we’ve been spending the past five hours cleaning that up.”
At the sound of voices coming out of the infirmary, Percy barged in, nodding at Hazel before holding you tightly in his arms. You hugged back, glad to see that he was okay. Smiling at both of you, Hazel waved goodbye and left, knowing you two needed a moment alone
“Hazel told me what happened,” you said once Percy pulled away, still keeping your hand in his. At this, he looked at the ground in shame, remembering how much his treatment of Akhlys had scared you in Tartarus
Rubbing circles into your hand, he said, “I’m sorry, Y/N, my fear and anger got the better of me. I don’t ever want to lose you, you’re literally my soulmate. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
Your heart fluttered at his words. Feeling your face become warmer as a bright smile made its way onto your lips, you said, “it’s alright, Percy. Thank you for saving me. I genuinely thought I was going to die then.” At this, Percy’s brows furrowed and the grip he had on your hand tightened
An aura of power exuded from your boyfriend, and when he said, “you wouldn’t die, not with me here. I’d kill for you, baby, you understand that, right?” You knew he meant it. If giants didn’t have to be defeated by both Gods and demigods working together, Polybotes would definitely be a mere pile of dust in Tartarus right now
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hotpinkstars · 5 months
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ESPRESSO - aventurine x reader
- "now he's thinkin' bout me, everynight, oh, is it that sweet? i guess so." or, how does aventurine do when he's in love?
- GUYS GUYS QUEEN SABRINA DROPPED A SINGLE i've been listening to this for days and i needed to write about it sooooooooooo yeah! anyways i'll get to writing probably a few requests tomorrow and wednesday (expect 4-5 posts between those days to make up for my absence) and yeahhhhhh enjoy!!
- aventurine might be a little ooc, mentions of his trauma (so penacony main quest spoilers), reader confesses at the end. wc 1067
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Aventurine doesn’t know what to do when he first figures out that the feeling in his chest whenever he saw you was because he liked you. He probably tried to deny it, until Topaz caught him blushing like crazy after you walked away from the conversation you two had just finished. (Even then, she had to tell him, and then he spent a long time thinking that possibility through. She might have been right). 
You plague his visions. Why does he always want something to do with you? Why does he always want to be in your space, but also never wants to see you again? You’ve noticed his weird behavior, considering you were one of the first people he’s ever genuinely called a friend, but didn’t really think too far into it. 
Though, it didn’t stop you from paying more attention to it, that's for a fact. Sometimes you’d pay more attention to his body movements around you, the way he speaks, his etiquette, etc. You and Topaz communicate through it, and it’s a little bit different from his conversations with her. 
You know he can be cocky. Like, very cocky. You know he’s not too afraid to talk back, to challenge someone to a gamble (spoiler he wins), and to be reckless. Though, you also know about his backstory. So you can kind of understand where he’s coming from. 
He’s been pretty open with you about all of the things he’s endured. You know his real name, he’s described how his family has looked, and he’s described his years he endured slavery and what his home planet was like. You know about the Men in Black and the Katicans. And you know how traumatized he is.
Now, you’ve known him for a long, long time before this. You welcomed him into the IPC when Jade first announced his arrival, and you kind of showed him the ropes. He thought you seemed kind, so he stayed in contact with you.
You’ve watched him change, all of his progress through life, the hard times and the good times, and so much more. And that's what gets him the most, he thinks. 
He never realized how much he trusted you until he realized he liked you. You know every single thing about this man, which was the reason why he was rather… nervous when he’d have to communicate with you face to face. He did a good job at keeping up his front he uses to talk to people, but you sensed a slight form of stress underneath all the layers he put up to look tough. 
He lays awake, thinking about you. You’ve made part of his mind your home, and it’s the part he comes back to over and over again. You replay in his mind like a good song that he can’t get enough of- on, and on, and on, and on. 
He does like to bring you little trinkets he finds pretty when he goes out in public to do some shopping. Considering how wealthy he is, he could probably afford to buy out the whole store, so if you even mention something you like to him, he’s on his way to find it for you. He likes to think of it as he’s buying your kindness, but you think something completely different. You enjoy his sudden gift giving, not just because of your gain, but because he thought about you enough to do such a thing. It always makes you slightly blush before laughing while opening the box presented in front of you. He thinks that's the most precious part about your time spent together; all of the opportunities he gets to listen to your gorgeous laughter and see your flawless smile. Topaz, pinch the man, he’s in his own personal dreampool.
Oh, how bad he wants to confess to you, but he’s really afraid of rejection. He fears losing you entirely, fears that you won’t look at him like you always do if he asked if you two could be a thing. He fears you’d think he was odd for wanting you to himself, and that you’d slowly back away until you refuse to even look at his broken, battered form any longer. The thought makes a shiver crawl up his back. He can’t lose you too. 
All this man asks is to find a way to remove you from his head. You’re absolutely tormenting him! Notice how he’s been lacking on his work lately, always caught in a daze when he’s sitting down at his desk? That’s you he’s daydreaming about. He’s no good with his emotions. He knows how to hide sadness, fear, and anger, but he’s never been in this boat before. Love is a whole new concept to him. 
“Aventurine, you’ve been out of it lately. Tell me, is something the matter?” You barge through the blonde's office, not even bothering to knock. You know you don’t have to, he’s never doing anything so significant in that tiny space that it needs to be kept private.
“What are you saying? Nothings up with me,” he drops his pen in the small plaster pen cup you bought for him. “Work has been tiring lately. Nothing to stress over.” 
You plop into the chair in front of his desk, resting your arms on the top and putting your head in between your palms.
“I can tell when you lie. Tell the truth.”
He looks away. What was he supposed to say? That he couldn’t get you out of his brain, and that you’re the only thing he can focus on? That’ll scare you off for sure!
“Aventurine?? You there?” you wave a hand in front of his face, snapping him out of his daze once more. “You know, you don’t have to lie. I already know what you’re thinking.”
His eyes slightly widen, just enough for you to notice. You giggle very lightly before continuing on with your sentence. “You have a little crush, don’t you? Don’t worry, I like you back. Seriously, I do.”
He doesn’t know how to reply to that. He doesn’t know if he wants to faint or make out with you right now. “So that makes us…?”
“I don’t know. We could remain friends, we could be boyfriend girlfriend, whatever you want. I don’t care.”
Well, he believes he already knows the answer he’s choosing.
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ravengards-rogue · 7 months
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✧ tags : afab + fem!reader, top karlach, bottom reader, strap-ons, breaking the bed, act three spoilers (vaguely), karlach is the weensiest bit of a bully, 18+
.𖥔 ݁ ˖˚☽˚。
Karlach can't keep her hands off you.
Not her fault, in her defense. She had to spend an incredibly long, incredibly daunting leg of your journey not being able to touch you at all. Really, some of the hardest shit she's ever done in her life - even with her time in Avernus being Zariels' little lapdog.
Now that she has the privilege, she has to make the most of it. Her engines burning her up from the inside so she ought to make the most of everything. You especially. Who knows what will be left of her memory when her soul ends up in fugue plane? She hopes and prays her last memory is the feeling of you tucked in her arms all safe.
That being said, she's always on you. She likes fucking you whenever she can, wherever you'll let her. You're proper cute when she sneaks into your bedroll and lets her hand underneath your waistband, muffling little moans into the side of her neck as she holds you. Got the prettiest little voice she's ever heard when you whine for her, grip her forearm and beg all teary eyed.
That's been good and well - fucking amazing really. But there's been one thing that Karlach has been dying to do since she's gotten back to Faerun which is fuck you. Like, really fuck you.
She makes you cum in other ways. Whatever available, really. Hands, mouth, the muscle in her thigh when you're especially needy. Gods, she's grateful to see you like that. Leader of the pack all soft and trembling her bedroll all night, a sight for sore eyes.
But she wants to fuck you. She needed a strap to do that, and those sorts of things are only easy to find in the city - not in the middle of nowhere in the backwaters of the Sword Coast.
She knows you want it too, always begging for more.
You're in the city now, though - and you've visited Sharess' Caress, and now Karlach finally has something to fuck you with. You're finally in Elfsong song now (no more sleeping on dirt!) and the rest of your party has gone off to explore the city. There's plenty of business to attend to. The two of you offered to stay behind, hold down the fort.
(And well, no one was really going to stay after that were they? Not with the happy couple around, with Karlach eyefucking you as openly as she possibly can at least.)
She really is glad that you have all this time to yourselves for now.
Now that she's finally, finally fucking you - she isn't sure it'll be easy for her to stop.
You're pretty laying underneath her. Naked, sweat making your skin sheen as Karlach stands back on her knees and fucks you on your back. Your chest bounces every time your ass meets the thrust of her own hips, your voice trembling as she gets into proper pace to fuck you.
She gives you a wicked little smile, watching with abject fondness as her cock slides into you again. Shiny with your arousal, your cunt is tight with resistance even as she goes slow. You mewl, your hands reaching to push against Karlach's abs.
"Too much, Karlach, can't—" You gasp as she bullies the swollen head back into you. "S-senstive,"
"Didn't take you for such a quitter, soldier. You were just begging for it and now it's too much," She goads, fucking you deeper. You groan as your spine arches, nails scratching at her waist. "Try a little harder, baby."
Your voice breaks into a pathetic moan, weakly trying to push her out. Legs shaking as she fucks another inch into you. You're so wet she can hear it, hear how soft your pussy gets trying to accommodate around her length. Whimpering you close your eyes and shake your head.
"Too much. I c-can't cum again, can't."
Fuck you're delightful. It's nice when Karlach gets the chance to render you as helpless as you always make her feel. Pitiful and tender, she hums a little as she bottoms out again. Her eyes go lidded with want as she looks at the place in where she's inside of you, stretching your tight little hole. Fucking pretty thing you are. Pretty face and pretty heart and the prettiest pussy she's ever seen in her life. She's mesmerized how something so big can fill something so small. You stretch around her cock so well, so perfect.
"Of course you can." She murmurs. Hot hands curl around your wrists, your arms straightening out in front of you as Karlach holds them. Your fingers brush against your abdomen again but don't find the same purchase as Karlach holds you down. "A little more and you'll make another mess for me to clean up like always, huh?"
"Karlach," You whine, your eyes fluttering open. Your lashes are wet with overstimulated tears, mouth curled in a soft and pouty flush. "Karlach,"
She laughs, sharp teeth showing as she rolls her hips - undulating slower. A soft pace to ease you into it again. She knows just the right angles. You like two ways. Hard and heavy, her hips fucking into yours
She steals a glance at your desperate face and settles on the latter. "I'm right here, pretty girl. And I'm not going anywhere, either. Now hold on,"
It's the most she spares as a warning before she sets a brutal pace. She use your hands for purchase as she pulls her cock out, and thrusts all the way back in with a loud, unforgiving groan. Her clit digs into the leather backing of the strap when she does, delicious friction making her head feel numb.
You cry out as she thrusts deep and hard, cock buried to the hilt again.
She keeps the same brutal, unforgiving pace. The room sounds with the weight of her thrusts, skin smacking against skin and the soft internal whirr of her engine noisy. Lewd, wet sounds mix with the visual of you laid underneath her, tits bouncing with every smack of hips.
She throws her head back back, euphoria washing over her in a haze.
"Fuck yeah, that's it baby. Feels good. Feeling me right in your stomach?"
You nod deliriously as your hand curls into a fist, struggling to keep up. She laughs at you as she ducks her head to meet your mouth. You kiss her with immediate fervor chasing her lips aimlessly while she fucks you hard and deep.
Her name sounds so good from your mouth, she doesn't think she'll ever get sick of it.
.𖥔 ݁ ˖˚☽˚。
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tales-from-elysivm · 6 months
Note
Can you do some headcanons or stories on arcane? Specifically Vi or Sevika if your comfortable. I was just wondering but if you don't want to then you don't have to, you have free will.
Know that you're loved!
★。/ !bark like you want it! \。★
pairing: vi x f!reader, sevika x f!reader (separate)
fandom: arcane
word count: 1,470
tw: canon typical swearing/slang, some light spoiler warnings, and MDNI content, mainly because we know these are some dominant ass women ;) 
THIS IS NSFW CONTENT! BE WARNED!
song title: bark like you want it by sir mix-a-lot
notes: i love my girl vi so this request was a given, thank you anon! Hope you enjoy! :D I normally didn't like Sevika as much, but I will admit, writing her head canons for this post definitely made me reconsider
! be sure to like and reblog if you enjoyed !
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↳˗ˏviˎ˗ ↴
Vi is (without a doubt) very rough around the edges
She’s street-smart but she doesn’t really know what to do when it comes to actual romantic relationships, sex is easy, feelings are hard 
Her time in Stillwater makes her distrustful of people, along with her generally traumatic and difficult childhood, so it will probably take a while for her to begin to see you in a less-than-threat way
After that things are pretty smooth
You don’t really know where the split between ‘friendship’ and ‘relationship’ is, because they both include her joking, flirtatious personality ranging from skirting touches on your thighs and up your back, or teasing pet names like ‘sweetheart’, ‘cupcake’ and ‘love’
Other than that she’s very protective of you, especially if you live in Zaun
If you go out on errands she’ll always make sure she’s conveniently there at the times you like to go, able to loop an arm around your waist and guide you through the crowds
If someone is stupid enough to try and pull something on either one of you, Vi is not above beating the shit out of someone to keep them from laying a hand on you
I have a feeling that she’d confess to you accidentally in the middle of a fight
Perhaps she had been disappearing for long periods of time, and coming back bloodied and injured, refusing to tell you anything of her adventures (mainly because she doesn’t want to worry you). And eventually you pester her for a bit too long and begin a full verbal fight, where she suddenly blurts that she loves you
Now as a lover?
The teasing banter still remains, her little playful nicknames too, if anything they get worse. But she gets more confident with her touches, more deliberate. A hand in your backpocket while you’re walking, an arm around your shoulder, pinching your ass when you’re waiting outside a store, this girl has no shame
! mdni content below !
Now, i have a feeling that Vi isn’t really uneducated when it comes to sex
If anything i feel like she’s a fast learner-
The first time you actually lie together, Vi is sure to take it at your own pace, eager to please beneath a taunting smile, even if you don’t know what you like at first, she’s likely to find it quickly 
I personally don’t see Vi as owning too many sex toys - if any at all - but i think she would 100% favour using her fingers to anything else
Just the way you clench down on them, how she can use the rough calluses on the pad of her thumb on your clit to her advantage, and how deep she can pry, anything to make you scream for her
To be honest? I also 10000% expect her to try and flip you over and put you in a chokehold with her forearm tight against your throat, just adding enough delicious pressure to hitch your breath, but never enough to hurt too much
9/10
Her oral game would be fucking good too, i can tell. But she’d probably prefer to finger you or use a strap-on so she can continue to tease you with all these sinful little things she can come up with while she fucks into you
I’d say more of a biter, but she can still eat you out like a starving woman
Oral game 7/10
Aftercare is important to her, always making sure that she wasn’t too rough with you, cleaning you up, running you a bath or just lying with you to cuddle. Wants to make sure you know that you’re more important to her than some casual fling, and that she wants to ensure your happiness above anything
(Also gives you some balm for the definite bruises on your thighs and throat :D)
↳˗ˏsevikaˎ˗ ↴
Sevika is… intense
In all honesty, probably started as enemies
She probably wouldn’t want anything to do with you unless you already worked with Silco, so we could say you started in the shimmer warehouses, helping to distribute it throughout Zaun
You get your work done effectively, so Sevika overall sees you as a valuable position in the business, and keeps you around without much complaint
At some point Silco requested you deliver a hefty batch of shimmer to a more dangerous part of the Undercity, and sent Sevika with you to ensure no messes were left behind
Safe to say, you were ambushed
Despite Sevika being there to ‘protect’ you, you’re still able to hold your own, displaying proficient skill with your weapons against bandits who thought they could steal some of the shimmer vials. In the carnage, Sevika decides begrudgingly that she has respect for you
From there, it’s less of a ‘friendship’ and more of a drinking buddy situation
She doesn’t often tolerate the presence of others in her private time, so you label it as a friendship initially
She’s slightly more soft-spoken when she’s alone with you, and shares her cigars with you while she’s gambling, which often earns a strange look from her opponents as you hover over her mechanical shoulder with her cigar hanging from between your lips to see her hand, a bit too close
But Sevika lets you be without anything more than a bit of a grumble
I don’t think she’d even particularly say outright that she loves you
What happens is - instead - that you both have a drinking binge at the pub one night, after a successful night of gambling, and you both get absolutely shit-faced
While drunk she drags you back to her house and the night is filled with hazy sex, enthusiastic makeouts and early-morning cigarette smoke
You try to sneak out the next morning, expecting it to only be a one-night thing
She catches you (i headcanon that she’s a pretty light sleeper, but i suppose that could be said for most Zaunites). I don’t think she’d even say it then, just drag your ass back to bed for a (consensual) round two
After that you go to the bar together as normal, go about your business, now with the added bonus of Sevika protectively snarling at a drunk guy hitting on you by saying ‘that’s my spouse, fuck off’
(And of course, with plenty of sneaky sex between your deliveries and hurried makeouts :D)
! mdni content below !
BUCKLE YOUR SEATBELTS MFS, THIS SHIT IS KINKY
I would like to clarify, you will never top in this situation, Sevika would rather die than bottom to anyone, no matter how much she loves you
Spanking, spanking, spanking, spanking–
Hickeys, bruises, bite marks, the red tracks of her nails over your back, just anything that would leave even the most fleeting mark on your skin
That being said, would also 100% leave hickeys on places she knows you can’t hide easily
Definitely into sex toys (ball gags, bondage, strap ons and vibrators with little remotes she can keep in her pocket just in case, she especially likes to plant down one of those dildos with the suction cups and get you to ride it, all the while begging for her to just touch you, but she refuses, smoking as she watches you cry out for her)
She also likes crying-
I think she’d prefer to have you from behind, your back against her chest, ramming into you with one of her favourite straps, one hand pinching at your nipples, tweaking them between her fingers, and the other rolling tight circles on your clit, sometimes switching one out to wrap around the column of your throat
Definitely into edging on most days, and will resort to overstim if she’s happy with the work you’ve done in the day
Risky sex is definitely her thing, in her office in Silco’s base, in the warehouse on the crates of shimmer, under her desk, you on your knees to service her
She’s especially rough, and absolutely loves some degradation, and the way it makes you clench around her strap or her fingers, your eyes rolling back into your head while you scream for her
Aftercare is rarely over-the-top
She’ll cuddle you if you ask her explicitly but she prefers to share a cigar with you, or blowing smoke into your open mouth while you breathe against her bare chest
If she’s been unable to fuck you for some time, she’ll clean you up after about four or five rounds, mainly by eating you out until you end up giving her another two, but she’ll make sure you’re clean before you pass out anyway
Despite everything, Sevika will always make sure she doesn’t go to far
If anyone asks though, she will absolutely deny how she always makes sure you remember your safeword before you have sex after a makeout
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thanks for the request anon!
if you have any more requests don't hesitate to ask :)
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17020 · 2 months
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RULE OF THIRDS
High school is home for a lot of things, including jealousy and drama. My boyfriend's misery is your enjoyment this time! This is love triangles, with the Wind Breaker men. Warnings for manga spoilers (last blurb), drinking, ooc ume (sawrryyyy) !! tagging @kaiser1ns !!
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A NIGHT OF REVELATIONS.
REN KAJI, featuring TOMA HIRAGI
Ren Kaji set aside his ego and pride to attend some afterparty because he knew you would be there. That meant a lot.
And at first, everything was... fine? He stepped out of his comfort zone, headphones down as he listened to the beats of the music which played over the speakers. His eyes met yours, with you linking your pinky with his.
"What? You wanna dance with me?" he questioned, his tone almost accusatory. It was what he wanted more than anything, yet he made it sound as if it was your desire. The mere thought of your skin grazing his made his heart want to burst out of his chest.
"You want me to dance to Feid? No fucking way Rennie, I don't dance to that. Plus, you should take care of Toma, he's on another planet."
Sure, the song was ass, yet he still felt his heart shatter. He watched as you waltzed away, heading towards your friend group to chat. Kaji turned his head to the side, only to find his upperclassmen staring back at him. His bloodshot eyes were puffy, lips pursed before he raised an almost empty bottle of god-knows-what to his lips.
Great. Now he has to babysit.
When he sat down next to Hiragi, Kaji had a bad feeling.
“M’gonna do it tonight, Kaji.”
Call it foresight, or a crazy good intuition, but Ren Kaji knew his heart would sink this very night. “Good” he hummed. It was the only thing to come out of his mouth, as he felt his stomach churn from the anxiety.
“Ya sure ya don’t feel anything for her?”
“All good” he squeaked, “let me know how it goes.”
When he found you a while later, Kaji was stunned. There you were, drunk out of your mind and blowing smoke out of your pretty lips, body swaying to one of Fanny Lu's greatest hits.
With Kota. Fucking. Sako.
It was a night of revelations, seeing as the once grumpy blond had a tiny smile on his face, mouthing the lyrics to Don Juan while facing you. His stiff body was now in sync with yours, chuckles escaping your lips as you commented on how great of a dancer he was.
Kaji saw you stumble, and he took that as a sign. He knew he had to care for you. That, and the fact that he also had to get you away from Sako, for his own mental wellbeing. With his hand getting ahold of yours, Kaji guided you to a more secluded space of the patio, patting your head and asking if you're okay.
"You should go home, Yn. You've had enough to drink."
When he asked to hang with you the day after, Kaji was wary. Sitting down next to one another in one of Cactus Bakery's booths, he sighed.
"You got home safe?"
"Mhm."
"You didn't dance with me."
"Yeah, I didn't."
"You did with Sako, though."
Resting your head on his shoulder, you laughed. "Fanny Lu is certainly not denied to anyone! If you had chosen another song other than Feid's, I certainly would've danced with you, Rennie."
A small smile appeared on his face as his mind raced on about what could have been the greatest night of his life, only to come back to his senses after he realized it could have been someone else's.
"Anything else happen?"
"Yeah" you shrugged, "Hiragi texted me this morning, said he liked me."
He froze. Since when was he Hiragi to you?
"...well, what'd you say?"
Ren Kaji thought he was going to die.
"Turned him down. He's like a brother to me, and I made that abundantly clear. He took it well, so that's that! He thanked me for being so mature about it."
Last night was now certainly the greatest night of Kaji's life, as he realized he still has a chance.
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WHEN ONE STORY CLOSES, ANOTHER OPENS.
HAJIME UMEMIYA, featuring JO TOGAME
Hajime Umemiya was going to pop a blood vessel when he saw none other than Shishitoren's second-in-command's hand holding yours, noses nearly grazing each other as he leaned down to whisper in your ear. Your giggles, which were once his favorite tune, were now like nails on a chalkboard.
Because it was Togame who made you laugh.
His anger was indetectable, a smile plastered on his face as he observed the way in which you laughed at his jokes, how you tilted your head to the side and looked at him with those alluring eyes of yours, how you reached out to him when talking.
Screw that, it was so obvious that Umemiya was fucking jealous, as his eyes were squinted, his face had an expression of disgust, and one could swear that his left eyelid was trembling.
When you went to him a few days later telling him you had exchanged socials with Togame, Umemiya simply nodded with a smile on his face, congratulating you on how well things were going. He thought his soul was going to leave his body.
"He said he used to play street ball, and he played as a striker, and he wants to play volleyball with me! Can you believe that, Ume?"
"That's great, Yn! Y'know I used to play street ball too, I was well-known for that back in the day, I used to play for my middle school as a striker" he grinned, his hand rubbing the back of his neck. "I could teach you to play both sports if you'd like! You wouldn't have to hop onto Shishitoren turf that way."
Hajime Umemiya was utterly adorable.
That same night you received a text.
UME !! <3 This Thursday me and my siblings are gonna play ball! You wanna join?
Umemiya's t-shirt fit you like a glove.
Having little attire for a match, Umemiya offered to gift you one of his shirts for you to play in, and the white and baby blue stripes made you look fantastic. To him, you were an angel sent from heaven to bless his eyes, as well as the football 'field'.
After playing like total lunatics, Umemiya sat down cross-legged in the middle of the park's grass, you laying down and having your head resting on his thighs.
What Umemiya wanted to do in that moment was kiss you senseless.
"Hey Ume... can you help me with something?"
"Sure thing."
"Togame's sort of being a bit pushy, and I don't have any interest in him at all. Can you take a picture with me so that he'll shoo?"
His eyes sparkled more than the world's most expensive diamond. He excitedly nodded, asking you to open your phone's camera as he gently moved so that he laid beside you, resting his head on your shoulder and his arm wrapped around your waist.
Click!
Umemiya felt like the luckiest man in the world when he found out Togame had seen your story with him and had suddenly ghosted you.
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GOOD PEOPLE, GOOD DEEDS.
HARUKA SAKURA, featuring YAMATO ENDO
When Haruka Sakura heard of a certain someone's temporary return to Furin, he thought nothing of it. Except for when that certain someone came waltzing up to him after seeing him interact with you a few minutes prior, a smug smile on his face.
"So, Sakura! Mind slippin' me her number?"
"Huh?"
"Yeah! That girl you were talking to before, she's totally my type."
"And why the hell would I do that?"
Endo laughed as he placed his arm on Sakura's shoulders, seeing how the boy in question's face turned beet red. "Because, Sakura, you're a good person! Good people do good deeds!"
There was no way in hell Haruka Sakura was giving him your number. Matter of fact, he didn't budge!
So why in the fuck were you giggling in front of him at Pothos, telling him Yamato Endo was in your messages asking you out to breakfast?
Sakura's eye started to twitch as he asked how he got your number, nearly spitting out his omelette rice when you told him Nirei had given him your number. When you told him that Endo was planning on coming to Furin on Saturday to meet up with you, his face became a newfound shade of red. Whether it was from anger or from Endo's affection towards you, he did not know.
Friday came by, and to Sakura's surprise...
"Oh gosh, Haru!"
"What's going on?"
"Endo cancelled breakfast, said he couldn't make it since he's on his turf and can't come to Bofurin's."
"'s a shit move to cancel last minute."
"But, Tsubaki told me there's a party over at Keisei street tomorrow night. Wanna come with? I don't wanna go alone."
Sakura's ears and cheeks were flushed as he stuttered a reply: a meek and simple 'yeah'. You smiled as you wrapped your arms around Sakura, too excited to even let him react. When Saturday night came around, you thought you were going to die.
Yamato Endo was in Keisei street, grinding on another girl as he asked for her number.
Your jaw dropped to the floor. To your surprise, Sakura was even more enraged than you were. Grabbing your wrist, he dragged you over to a bench, sitting you down and placing your head on his shoulder.
"Let it out."
Confused, you asked what he meant by it. He laid his head on top of yours, with you feeling how his stiff body slowly softened as he sighed.
"I said let it out. Yer obviously hurt by that asshole, so let it out."
Your sobs were swallowed by the blaring music, but for some reason, the sadness quickly faded away, instead being replaced with a sense of tranquility. As if you belonged there, with Sakura by your side.
Sakura was sure that Yamato Endo was a good person, doing him a favor by leaving you all to himself.
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note. this is for my boyfriend. this is what you get for calling me your stinky poo. i am not a poo. the poos are your friends who tried to get with me later on. or perchance the poo has been you all along, because you did not give one shit that they liked me and you made your move. love always, your PRINCESS NOT POO.
181 notes · View notes
totallyhextra · 11 months
Text
People? In MY computer?? It's more likely than you think!
The following is a fanvertisment and is not connected to the show. ****Yet.*** *Also yes, this is the fourth time I'm posting this because TUMBLR WONT LET ME EDIT SPELLING MISTAKES!
ANYWAY,
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Once upon a time, back in 1987, Dire Straits put out this music video for “Money for Nothing”, which, as you know, was a song about wanting my MTV. 
youtube
The video was made by two guys (Gavin Blair and Ian Pearson) on a very moody computer. After the video went out, these two guys went to a pub:
Ian: “Hey, we should make a whole show like this!”
Gavin: “Dude, making three minutes almost killed us.”
And so it was decided!🎉
The two guys were joined by two other guys (Phil Mitchell and John Grace) and created the Hub, which then became Mainframe Entertainment. They got even more people, and then they all holed up in this hotel.
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They were mad lads with a dream: a whole cgi animated show, and they made it happen a whole year before Toy Story!
Behold! ReBoot!
(Yes that fever dream was real)
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Now before I get any of this:
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Let me lay this down. If you can’t with the animation of the first season because it was CUTTING EDGE IN 1994, you can close your eyes and listen to it. ReBoot wasn’t just a CGI gimmick. The characters are fully developed, the voice actors are peerless, the plot is sharp, and there’s so many easter eggs that you’ll never find them all.
Never
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(And yes the episode "Bad Bob" was the actual catalyst for Fury Road. Look it up)
ReBoot is about what life is like in a computer (in the 90s, because it was the 90s) called Mainframe (because of course it is). People are sprites, the guys that look like 1s and 0s are binomes (which represent 1s and 0s). Bad guys are viruses, and the good guy is a Guardian named Bob, who is a certified cinnamon roll.
In the first season the eps are light and self-contained, mainly because there was constant friction between the Mainframe studios and the Board of Standards and Practices.
They still got away with some pretty dark stuff, like Megabyte (virus) making Enzo (the kid) watch his dog get sliced open (dog got away, obviously) , Dot (sprite) have a hallucinatory breakdown, and the fridge horror of realizing the thousands of worm things (nulls) that plunged off a bridge to their death were actually people.
And Hex's (virus
best girl) scary face single-handedly traumatized an entire generation. 🙂
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But busting through a window was a no go, because WhAt If tHe cHiLdReN dID iT tOo?
Anyway, halfway through the second season, ABC cut them loose, so they were like, fuck it, we’re going to start going hard. The story shifted from episodic to arcs and things start to get serious.
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Third season the show moved to YTV in Canada, which gave no fucks about shielding the innocent children.
So it got DARK
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How dark?
The UK refused to show the entire season, so the audience there had to wait until pirated copies made it across the pond to see how it ended.
Also by 1997, the animation was gorgeous. (Best example of third season animation I could think of that didn't have spoilers)
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The show was green-lit for a fourth season on Cartoon Network, but halfway through production Warner Bros took over and the same fucking thing happened.
Because Mainframe was halfway done, they decided not to scrap all of it, but knowing they wouldn't be able to finish it correctly, Mainframe stripped anything that would hint at Season Four's true ending, then left what remained on a cliff-hanger of angst.
FOR 22 YEARS
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(It's also why the last four eps of season four seem to make no sense)
And so it was.
Other crap happened, the soul left Mainframe, and its animated corpse spat out “The Guardian Code” in 2018. 
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But never say die! The year is (almost) 2024, 30 years later. ReBoot shall rise from the dead, because here come the documentary!!
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Do you dare see what you’ve been missing?
What the (UK) government doesn’t want you to know?? 
Then come on down to ReBoot!
We got:
Magnificent bastards with sexy voices!
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(Tony Jay at his best)
Kickass women who could probably crush your head with their thighs and you’d enjoy it!
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Innuendos in a kid's show!
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💗 This adorable cinnamon roll!! 💗
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Insane third season glow-ups!
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YOUR NEW GOD
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These guys!
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(Gay roller-skating binome is my boi. I named him Jerry)
Nonstop cultural refs (You'll never find them all. Never.)
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(There are literally videos dedicated to trying)
So many computer puns!
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Body Horror!
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Existential Crisis!
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HAVE I MENTIONED YOUR NEW GOD?
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This is it, folks! The real thing, the gem hidden in the moose-filled forests of Canadia!🌲🌲🌲
Take a trip inside a mid-90’s computer!
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See the World Wide Web! (omg):
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Witness the original purple Gamecubes that randomly fall from the sky when the owner of the computer (OUR GOOD LORD THE USER) wants to play a game. If it lands on people and they lose, they dissolve into mindless energy leeches, fated to tormented by their former bretheren for all of eternity.
Just like in real life! 🙃
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So watch the eps! They on YouTube!
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I think they're on Pluto, Hulu, Sling, and Tubi too! Also DVDs for people who have the patience to wait for them!
WATCH! BELIEVE! SUFFER THE SOUL-CRUSHING RAGE OF THE SEASON 4 CLIFF-HANGER!* (come on, its fun!)*
HYPE THE DOC!
The more people hype, the better the chances of actually getting it finished.
NOW SHARE THIS WITH EVERYONE!
And now I will leave you with this screenshot from the ep "Painted Windows", where dicks can clearly be seen drawn upon the wall behind the fleeing anthropomorphized television.
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(PS: If you heard the clown pic at the top of the page in your head, you're welcome)
IMPORTANT UPDATE
This message is now approved by Gavin Blair! He's an awesome guy. Show him some love on TWITTER (fuck you musk) at @TheRealMrSweary Also, if you want to share this with non-tumblr friends, here is my attempt at a webpage version:
theseventhstarprojects.com/REBOOT.html
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