#WHERE IS IT KANSAS

[crowleys-pink-tutu]

i am once again asking kansas where the hell the peace i was promised is

[raeofgayshine]

Bruce Wayne, drunk and full on Brucie mood in the middle of a gala: You know, that accent doesn’t really fit in around here. It’s cute. Where are you from?

Clark, internally debating every life choice that led him to this moment: I’m from Smallville. Kansas.

Bruce, leaning closer to Clark with a flirty smile: Oh you’re cute and funny. You know, I like that in a man.

Clark, very confused but trying to just go along with it: Thank you??

Bruce: I mean, everyone knows that Kansas isn’t real but I do always enjoy a good laugh.

Clark: What.

Bruce: What? Everyone knows that Kansas was made up for Wizard of Oz.

Clark, unsure if Bruce is fucking with him or if he’s just really deep into this dumb act: Bruce, Kansas is a real place. It’s one of the 50 states that make up America.

Bruce, tilting his head a little confused: There’s 50 states? Since when?

[therainingkiwi]

Train travel in The Lightning Thief/PJO TV season 1

Oh look, I'm overanalyzing fictional train travel because I'm one of Those neurodivergent people. Let's get into it. Warning for VERY minor book spoilers (just mentioning the names of all the cities our trio travels through).

TL; DR our trio's cross country travel route makes no sense at all.

In the first book/season of the Percy Jackson series, our main trio takes a cross-country trip from Long Island, NY, to Los Angeles, CA. In the beginning, it appears as if they've boarded a cross country bus that will drive them the whole way there (a trip that usually takes ~72 hours). However, they get derailed in rural New Jersey (presumably the northwestern part of the state).

After New Jersey, the action immediately skips ahead, and we next see our trio on an LA-bound train that's about to stop in St. Louis (and in the book, has a later stop in Denver).

So, just off the bat: the train route that the trio are taking doesn't exist IRL (assuming they board a train in Trenton, and that train stops in St. Louis, Denver, and Los Angeles). It's also impossible for a single person to travel that route for $200, much less three people. Chiron needs some up to date information about cross country travel prices.

If they were traveling a reasonable IRL amtrak route, they'd probably take the Cardinal from Trenton to Chicago, and then take the Southwest Chief from Chicago to LA. However, if they can get back to Penn Station from Aunty Em's, they could take the Lake Shore Limited from NYC to Chicago, which would be 7-8 hours shorter than getting to Chicago via the Cardinal.

They could also take a bus from north New Jersey to Chicago.

However, the Southwest Chief (most direct amtrak route to LA) stops at neither St. Louis nor Denver. The most notable cities along the route are Kansas City, Albuquerque, and Flagstaff.

If they wanted to take a route to LA that had them pass thru St. Louis, they could take the Texas Eagle from Chicago to St. Louis to San Antonio, and then take the Sunset Limited from San Antonio to LA. There are 3 trains per week that make this two-leg trip without requiring travelers to transfer at San Antonio, so our trio are probably on one of those. Why they didn't take the (shorter, cheaper, and more frequent) Southwest Chief is a mystery, honestly.

Since Chicago is the USA Amtrak hub, most routes will pass thru that city. The only alternative route is taking the Crescent from Trenton to New Orleans and then taking the Sunset Limited from New Orleans to LA. This would take them nowhere near Denver or St Louis, but probably wouldn't have a significant time/price difference from routing the trip thru Chicago (assuming they travel direct from Chicago to LA rather than taking the Texas Eagle thru San Antonio).

Unfortunately, there are no trains in the USA that travel between St. Louis and Denver (or even between St. Louis and Colorado in general), so that leg of their trip would have been made via bus. Greyhound (the USA's main long-distance bus travel company) has buses directly from St. Louis to Denver that end in California (but in San Francisco rather than LA).

In conclusion, I propose a new Amtrak route called "The Lightning Thief" that travels from New York-Penn Station, down the Northeast corridor thru New Jersey, and then turns west, making major stops in St. Louis, Denver, and Las Vegas, before terminating in LA. It doesn't stop in Amtrak's Chicago hub because all hub-and-spoke transit systems should have rim routes, and because Chicago isn't mentioned in The Lightning Thief.

Also, in conclusion, the USA needs better rail infrastructure and I'm a fucking nerd.

Amtrak map below for reference.

[little-pondhead]

Oops.

While learning to control his powers under the guidance of Clockwork, Danny accidentally curses his own bloodline with the Curse of Sentient Food several centuries in the past. Originally, a witch was supposed to curse his family. Oops. Well, the Fentons were always adapting, and technically, either way, he'd end up battling dino nuggets at three am in his underwear, no matter who the curse came from. So he shrugged and continued on.

Unfortunately, this also means that out of nowhere, the timeline shifted, and some of his very distant relatives are now battling their food into submission at every meal because Danny is ultimately way more powerful than some mortal witch from the 1600s. His version of the curse reached literally everyone he could ever be related to for the last few centuries. Even if they were adopted into the family!

So, returning to the present time after training, Danny is a little startled to see some news clips of people's dinners coming to life and beginning revolutions. Wow, John Fentonightingale really got around, didn't he? He felt a little uncomfortable that now all these random people had to deal with their share of Fenton luck, but from some of the interviews, everyone seemed to be handling it pretty well!

Especially his so-distant-they're-on-another-tree cousins, the Kents, who contacted his family directly, asking how best to prepare a zombie turkey. Their son was coming for Thanksgiving with his new wife and some coworkers, and they just refused to make the guests fight for their lives on a holiday!

They invited the Fentons to join them, of course.

[reiverreturns]

*bursts into the ted lasso tag covered in blood*

THE WHOLE GOAL OF BEING A MANAGER OF PEOPLE IS TO COACH THEM TO THE POINT WHERE THEY NO LONGER NEED YOU! GOOD MANAGERS KNOW THEY ARE SUPPORTING CAST AND NOT THE MAIN CHARACTER! IT’S A LOT LIKE PARENTHOOD BUT IT’S NOT A SUBSTITUTE! TED MISSED HIS KID! HE WANTED TO BE THE STABLE AND LOVING PARENT HE NEVER HAD! HE CHOSE TO DO BEST BY HIS SON BUT ALSO BY HIMSELF! JUST BECAUSE YOU LOVE A THING DOESN’T MEAN IT’S MEANT TO BE PERMANENT! GOODBYES CAN BE SAD AND HARD BUT STILL THE RIGHT THING TO DO! BEING A GOOD COACH - AND PARENT - IS ABOUT KNOWING WHEN TO LEAN IN AND KNOWING WHEN TO LET GO!

[nicolethered]

How it feels to see the Chiefs win another Super Bowl

[moscowlit]

Clark Kent Talks Like This Guide

1. Accent

Although Smallville’s location has never been explicitly revealed in the comics, according to the Smallville Wikipedia page, it’s placed approximately 55 miles from Salina, Kansas, and in line with Junction City, giving it approximately the same location as Dorrance, Kansas.

Dorrance is located in north-central Kansas, meaning Smallville most likely speaks the North Midland dialect, which largely retains elements of the General American. So, it’s unlikely that Clark grew up speaking with a southern twang: as is often the case with his portrayal in the comics, he probably speaks in “accentless” American English.

2. Slang

Here are some earmarks of Kansan slang I picked up on my ventures through related Reddit posts:

catty-cornered ‘kitty-cornered’ is a phrase used to describe something being diagonally opposite something else, but some Kansans use ‘catty-cornered’ instead.

needs fixed (eaten, done, cleaned, etc.) instead of saying ‘this needs to be fixed’, Kansans will say ‘this needs fixed’, omitting the ‘to be’.

I’m fixing to (thing that needs done) exactly what it sounds like.

cut ‘cut’ is used in place of ‘turn’ or ‘switch’ (e.g. cut that light on).

positive anymore there’s a whole Wikipedia page you’re going to want to check out, but basically, this is when the adverb ‘anymore’ is used with a similar meaning to ‘nowadays’ or ‘from now on’.

3. Does any of this matter when you’re writing a fun AU where Clark uses y’all’d’ve unironically?

NO!!!!

Have fun giving Bruce aneurysms about how many contractions Clark can fit into a sentence. This guide is meant to inform writers who don’t want to make Clark’s accent the focus of their works (or aren’t from the Midwest and aren’t comfortable with going full-out on the dialect), but may want to work in subtle references to his Smallville upbringing nonetheless.

Hope this helps!

(Disclaimer: Everything I’m writing here comes from my assessment of Kansans’ opinions on their dialect on internet forums. There is no such thing as an Inviolable Unified Kansas Accent, and every portrayal is as valid as the next!)

[nofacednerd]

I know everyone is giving their two cents on batman appearing in mawsm right now, but honestly I think it would be funny if, like, in season 2 (definitely not season 1 I think that should focus entirely on the main trio before introducing other dc characters like kara and such) I think that I would want One (1) World’s Finest episode except batman doesn’t even show up, it’s just Bruce Wayne showing up consistently in the B plot while the Daily Planet Intern Gang are running around getting into shenanigans. I want it to be implied that he’s Batman, and maybe Jimmy throws out a conspiracy theory that he is Batman, but everyone shoots it down because Jimmy’s theories are only somewhat right like 10% of the time anyway.

[angelsdean]

the CW has been telling us all "this is kansas" for over 20 yrs but really. that's just vancouver. this is about both smallville and supernatural. they love to lie

[patrick-mahomes]

PATRICK MAHOMES Wild Card Press Conference Jan 13, 2024

[itsclydebitches]

Okay so Ted's gonna go back to Kansas because Henry misses him and he'll struggle significantly without his support system/the life he's built in Richmond, but he'll bury it because he's determined to be a Good Dad™ now.

However, thanks to an advance copy of Trent's love letter book and a heart-to-heart with Henry that includes a "You're a good dad" line as a callback to Ted's admission to Sharon that he wished he'd told his own dad that more, Ted will realize that he can't possibly be the best father OR the best version of himself if he's miserable. Cue life lessons learned from his own father. So they talk it out as a family and it's agreed that Ted will return to Richmond and Henry will split his time between Kansas and London, getting the best of both worlds and both parents.

Henry: Cool, now I can see more West Ham games! :D

Ted: Hmm. Yep. Should've seen that coming. How 'bout we keep that between us, yeah? No need for Uncle Beard to know.

[paprikamahomes]

Did y'all see the gay today

[hldailyupdate]

Louis singing Where Do Broken Hearts Go.

Faith In The Future World Tour: Kansas City. (10 June 2023)

x

[killa-trav]

🎶 killa vocals

[aletterinthenameofsanity]

that hilarious moment that spotify sends you an email recommending concerts based on your tastes...and it's the literal two concerts you've already bought tickets to for this year as your attempt to expand your social sphere...anyway the internet knows everything about you and the surveillance state is definitely one of the greatest horrors of the modern age. fuck every tech ceo & eat the rich!

[wastehound-voof]

I just can't get into basketball.