#WOW THIS WAS A LOT AND IT WAS VERY PERSONAL HAHA

[tizniz]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by @devirnis 🩵

How many works do you have on ao3?

42. (Will be 43 tomorrow!)

What's your total ao3 word count?

172,166

What fandoms do you write for?

Currently 9-1-1, previously Harry Potter, Merlin, Percy Jackson, YouTubers, others

Top five fics by kudos:

Buck's Boyfriends

Threes Not A Crowd

Flare Up

Eddie's Housewife

a place where i feel at home

Do you respond to comments?

Every single one.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Come ask me after tomorrow's story.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Uh....most recently, I'd say Buck's Surprise that I wrote for Hippo.

Do you get hate on fics?

I have received one comment that was sort of 'mean' (but lead to me meeting Sunny 🥰) and then I got one mean comment that I deleted.

Do you write smut?

Hahahahahahaha. Yes.

Craziest crossover:

I do not personally write crossovers.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yup. Back when I posted on WattPad when I wrote imagines for YouTubers.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not to my knowledge.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes. Me and my ex wrote a LOT together. And then more recently I was writing with someone (unfortunately, due to reasons, that has since stopped).

All time favourite ship?

Merthur will always hold a special place in my heart. But Buddie has revived my writing inspiration in ways I haven't seen in so long. And then special shoutout to my OC and some of her pairings.

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Honestly? Probably my soul mark fic....

What are your writing strengths?

Fuck if I know. I'm hard on myself and barely think my stuff is good most days haha

What are your writing weaknesses?

Al, Hippo, and Ellie will yell at me if I say everything. So...uhm...sometimes I feel my writing is too simple?

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I am very careful to use as little as possible, because I struggle with English some days, and that's my native language.

First fandom you wrote in?

McFly. Back when I was on Fanfiction.Net....wow.

Favourite fic you've written?

Of my published ones? Fight or Flight or saving you, saves me.  Of my WIPs? Recovery. Of my secret fics? Either the entire universe that is Time Travel II or my Peter Pan modern verse stories. Neither of which are 9-1-1 fandom.

NP tagging: @hippolotamus, @actualalligator, @actuallyitsellie, @perfectlysunny02, @theotherbuckley, @spotsandsocks, @bidisasterevankinard, @elvensorceress, @daffi-990, @dangerpronebuddie, @underwaterninja13, @watchyourbuck, @cal-daisies-and-briars and literally anyone else who wants to do this because I’m tired and tagging is hard 🩵

[frootietoots]

the feminine urge to curl up inside a warm, breathing belly as a way to escape from the horrors of the real world

nothing would make me feel more secure than being cradled in the hands of someone so unfathomably giant and so, so, so kind. i need that right now. i need to be cared for. the thought of tender fingers curling around me as their maw opens up, a large, soft tongue curling around me slowly, reminding me of what i'm getting myself into. they'd be taking their time so as not to alarm me. with every twitch and jolt of my tiny body they would hesitate, afraid to startle me. as they hold their mouth open, warm breaths akin to that of a sugary-scented summer's breeze would wash over me in a steady, rhythmic pace. i would imagine the movement of their lungs as they breathe, envisioning each organic swell and contraction. they'd take pleasure in knowing what all i'd be thinking, aware after a certain point that my sheepish behavior is not fear, but rather,, something more light-hearted.

and then, i'd be pulled in. the light from the outside world would fade, replaced by a pitch-blackness unlike anything else. it's a comforting, breathing darkness that swallows me whole. this darkness is alive, and it tells me to simply relax. there is no need to strain my eyes with the light in an obnoxious, heartless world. darkness inside of them is where i find peace. besides, i know i'm not alone. if i was alone, the ground would not be shifting and squirming. there would be a soft *squelch* as the saliva trapped underneath their tongue is shifted about, eliciting a chuckle from me. i'd almost be able to feel the way they'd smile around me, knowing at the very least that they got me to laugh if nothing else. my laugh would trail off as my hands brush against their teeth, sharpened at the tips and yet completely harmless to me. to the lasagna i fixed from earlier, no, but i'm alive. i'm a person. they're free to tear into that lasagna as much as they'd like, matter of fact! i worked hard on it. me, however? i'm delicate to them. they know they must be gentle with me. they'd never use their teeth to hurt me. though, i do recognize that they'd like me to pay attention to those teeth of theirs. their tongue, soft and folded underneath me, would move to poke at the divot in one of their molars, bringing my attention to it in the process. i'd smooth my trusting hand over their molar and thumb at every individual detail. it's fascinating, really. i think a big reason why vore intrigues me so much to begin with is because it's all so terribly captivating. everything is alive, and everything alive surrounds me. it's comforting.

i really think we need to appreciate just how nice mouths are, y'know? i think that's an underrated part in vore. there's so much material, and yet it goes untouched for the most part, but i digress

we'd need to move on eventually. their maw would start to fill up with drool, and since i would have been anticipating the upcoming part, i'd already be comfortable and prepared for their tongue to lift, lift, lift, and send me sliding down their throat into a hot, pulsing abyss. every inch of my body would be coated in a thick blanket of slobber by this point, and i imagine that'd definitely make the journey down their esophagus much, much easier. i think most people fail to realize just how challenging it'd be to swallow someone whole without chewing, regardless of their size. or maybe we choose to overlook it bc vore can't technically exist at all irl anyway idk. i like to ramble lol

at some point, the tight, throbbing walls of their gullet would transition into a different space. i'd slip inside, recognizing my ability to move around and get comfortable unlike the other organ i was squeezed into after their swallow. as i'd lean my head back against the fleshy abdominal wall behind me, i'd feel a lack of resistance comparable to a beanbag chair and how it feels to lay in one. the walls would adjust to this new weight, moving to surround me. i would be cradled and held. adored instinctively. their stomach doesn't obviously have cognitive thought, but somewhere within the deep recesses of their mind, their brain perceives me as being more than just sustenance. i am loved here. this is my safe space, and nobody else would be able to agree. that is how i want this to be. if i could write my name somewhere in here, i would. that wouldn't last very long, though.

not a word would be exchanged between the two of us, and yet our silence holds more weight than anything we could say. my throat would feel dry, and i'd swallow a few times before raising my hand to pat at the lining of their precious gut. they'd laugh outwardly, and i'd know that if i could purr, i would be doing it. the tension in my muscles would dissolve into warmth, spreading throughout my small body. i am fragile and exposed, but that is how i like it. it's nice to feel small while being small.

for them, i'm unsure how they'd feel. i like to think that, while unnatural, this process would be enjoyable for them. the stinging ache behind their collarbone would be evidence of me, a reminder of the tiny body they carried into a comforting space. their soft fingers would rub at their neck, gracing over the spot near their adam's apple where i once was. they'd swallow again, feeling the bob of their throat. their hand would trail down to their stomach, pausing right above the taut flesh above their belly. with every rise and fall of my chest they'd feel movement, and they'd attempt to mimic it. i think they'd take in every foreign sensation one at a time, and i'd appreciate that. we're both still new to this, after all.

as they'd adjust themselves to get comfortable in bed, my environment would slowly move with me. i'd wait until i could no longer feel their movement, and then i'd curl up on my side in a small pool of gastric juices and drool. though very muffled, i'd hear the smacking of their lips and their deep, pleased hums as they savor what would be left of my recognizable taste clinging to the surfaces of their mouth. i might even hear them licking their fingers. i'd roll my eyes and bury my face into my arms, only to lift my head upon realizing that my arms are coated in slime. silly me. how could i forget? even with the constant drum of a strong heartbeat and the churning from below of a meal i prepared hours ago for them sounding all around me?

"you're a dork," i'd call out to them, my voice audibly cracking after so long of having nothing to say. the rumbling laughter that would surround me and the way their walls would squeeze around me briefly would remind me of just how small and frail i truly am within them.

"says the one who asked to be eaten earlier," they'd tease, a hint of playfulness evident in their tone. i'd scoff.

"yeah, well, i know you enjoy it. you'd be a liar to say you don't like the aftertaste i left in your mouth earlier," i would reply. they'd pause, and then i'd hear a hum without reply. being the way i am, i'd take that as surrender. not that it mattered. they'd be in a more lovey-dovey mood anyway.

the way they'd yawn would send chills speeding up my spine despite the hot, stale air within the depths of their insides. i'd reciprocate the yawn and then settle in contentedly once and for all within them, finding peace in the silence that would arise again. sometimes i like the silence between us more anyway. it's nice to enjoy your presence, especially when it's all that i can enjoy, really. i'm trapped within you. there's nothing else to focus on. everything is you. everything i look at, smell, hear, breathe in... it's you. it's all you.

thanks for that. i like being here. maybe we can do this again sometime?

[monty-glasses-roxy]

Here’s my messed up attempt at a horse (without references)

The legs tho

I mean

You're right about the legs going on for days lmao

I love your horse sdfsfs

[leatherbookmark]

my dream portrayal of jgy is that he's an independant character with his own strengths (not lxc's sweet little child-birthing wifey) that get recognition and appreciation (and that aren't 'being a good mommy/rabid event planner, haha, such a control freak this a-yao'), who deserves and gets love (but isn't just a tiny lovely thing whose only purpose is-- do you get my point already i wonder), who's allowed to be in a bad mood (but isn't defined by those moments, which is very important to me personally), but who isn't a cruel or bad person (and whose attempts at explaining his situation to others are taken seriously, and not as just him trying to Manipulate Others As Usual because, and i might be controversial but idqc, if i'm to call a character a gaslighting manipulator i'd like to see cases of him a/ doing it b/ succesfully c/ often, and no, "well he conned lxc into thinking he's not an evil murderous twink, SOMEHOW" doesn't count)

and my problem is that it's, well, as dreams usually are, rather unattainable

[astrxealis]

its hard for me to listen to 'our light' bcs wnvr i do i always look at the lyrics again and i just want to cry so badly

[semisomni]

I dont watch the winchesters so idk what im talking about at all but. i think they should do a dracula episode. specifically a "dracula the book was the sanitized version and the story ACTUALLY ended with mina and jonathan both becoming vampires and killing their whole squad and now theyve run into the winchesters scooby gang" - type episode

[welcometoteyvat]

wahoo finally “”””caught up”“““““ on fontaine leaks

[lgbtlunaverse]

Considering wwx's canonical breeding kink and his general fondness for dubiously safe scientific experiments it is technically within the realm of possibility that a few years post-canon he just invents cultivation hrt and transition surgery by accident.

He just rocks up to a cultivation conference one day 5 months pregnant like "I turned my body into that of a woman! Yeah the boobs too we travel a lot and don't want a wetnurse. I'll reverse it in two years or so." And every single trans person and egg in the culivation world simultaneously sits up and goes "wait what?"

Imperical to understand that wwx still fully identifies as a cis man and does not know trans people exist. He did not know he was gay while actively being in gay love, this man is very smart but he doesn't know shit. Just a few weeks after the conference people start coming over like "hey... that thing you did... can you do that to me?" and he's like damn sure are a lot of dudes who wanna get pregnant. One day a "female" cultivator comes and is like "so you said you're going to reverse it... you think you can do that on a body that's already female? Turn my body into a man's body?" And he just goes well probably, let's find out!! It's so great all these people wanna help him perfect his techniques, isn't it lan zhan?

Years later they run into one of the trans women he first helped and doesn't even recognise her as she's thanking him and after the clarification just goes "wow! haha damn you're even wearing women's clothes! Should I start calling you guniang?" sort of as a joke but she's like yes please and he just says alright nice to see you again ma'am (still doesn't get it)

[fangirlika]

Hello! I don't know if you're up to writing smut (if not you can just ignore it haha), but maybe you could write something about reader not being very experienced and Charles, for teaching purposes, offers her some private lessons/tutoring, letting her do whatever she wants to him? Not in super kinky way, just getting to know his body and kind of exploring it ^^

sweet and hot at the same time, we love to see it! Loved the “for teaching purposes” hahaha Thank you for your request, I hope you like it!

Learning Hours

MASTERLIST

pairing: Charles Leclerc x female!reader

summary: you and Charles have been friends for a long time, however, the sexual tension between the two of you was there pretty much since the beginning. It was just that Charles, in contrast to you, was a lot more experienced. Time to share the knowledge, right?

warnings: nsfw, smut, porn with a little plot lol, oral (m receiving), typos probably

a/n: I got carried away with this ahhh I hope you enjoy it

“Oh come on, Y/n!”, Charles said as he sat on your bed, his head leaning against the headboard. “When was the last time you got laid? Last weekend?”

For context, the two of you somehow ended up in a conversation about how often the other one had sex over the past year. It was a joke, a lighthearted conversation between you guys.

You and Charles had been friends for what felt like a lifetime, hence, you were comfortable with him no matter what topic you were talking about.

In Charles' case it was no secret that he had his fair share of one night stands, girls he was seeing for a longer time and also two actual relationships over the past years. You couldn’t blame any of the girls he was with, that man is too gorgeous for his own good.

You on the other hand, never participated in the so-called hook up culture. You never blamed anyone who did, in fact you couldn’t care less, but you never felt comfortable enough to just go home with someone after a night-out or to meet someone online.

You’re not a virgin though. No, you had that one boyfriend, he later turned out to be a total douche, but for the time being, he was good enough to show you the basics in bed - never something crazy or actually anything but boring missionary sex where you’ve almost never really gotten off.

Sometimes, your inexperience made you a little shy and talking about your sex life has never been a preferred topic for you. So you just scoffed in fake annoyance and replied: “Sure, and I assume that you just came back from yet another poor girl's house?”

Charles put his hand over his heart to feign hurt. “Wow, ma chérie, that was personal”, he said but couldn’t help but chuckle a little. But then he looked at you again and the look on his face was nothing but curious. “But seriously, when was the last time? You never went home with someone after we went out together and as far as I know there are no dating apps on your phone…”, he thought out loud.

You didn’t like where this conversation was going. The last thing you wanted this afternoon was to admit to your guy best friend that you haven’t gone further than kissing a guy at a bar ever since you broke up with your ex-boyfriend, Charles never liked him anyways.

“So?”, you simply replied and tried to look as indifferent to the conversation as you possibly could.

Charles seemed to be able to connect the dots on his own, one could practically see the gears turning inside his head. “You’re telling me you haven’t had any sex since that excuse of a boyfriend?” Charles looked almost shocked.

You just rolled your eyes, really wanting to end this conversation. “I never told you anything like that”, you hugged out in annoyance.

“But, I’m right, am I not?”, Charles said, now there was a cocky grin on his face which just annoyed you even more. Of course he would find humor in this. It’s not to humiliate you, you know that, but between you two and also Pierre and some other friends teasing comments like these were very common.

You don’t know why but today you did not want to be on the receiving end of these remarks. “Okay, you are”, you said and moved your eyes down to the strings of your hoodie you were absentmindedly playing around with. “Are you happy now?”

Charles immediately noticed the shift from your relaxed and sarcastic state to seeming uncomfortable in the situation you two were in. Quickly, he stumbled out an apology: “N-no, I didn’t mean it like that. There is nothing wrong with not doing it often, nothing wrong with being inexperienced or… or-“

“Just drop it, Charles”, you sighed. “I know that I could go home with someone when we go out, but quite frankly, I don’t really want to.”

“That is fine! There is no shame in that, really, please, I didn’t want to make you feel bad about yourself”, Charles continued to ramble. He always did that when he was nervous or embarrassed, you couldn’t deny that it was kind of cute.

“No, it’s not that. I think it’s just that my inexperience keeps me from doing it, or something like that”, you said quietly.

“How does that make sense?”, Charles asked in confusion but put his hand up in defense when he saw your annoyed glance at him.

“I don’t know…”, you danced around the answer. “My ex and I we never really did anything… new in bed.” It took everything in you to admit the truth to Charles. “I guess I just don’t want to embarrass myself when I’d actually end up in bed with someone…”

Charles listened attentively and turned his head to look at you with a smile. You still avoided his gaze and casted your eyes downwards but he still noticed the faint reddening of your cheeks. God, you were so cute.

“You can practice on me if you want.”

Your eyes widened and you abruptly turned your head to look at Charles. “What?”

Charles didn’t really think before he said it. It just came to his mind. But when he took a second to actually think about it, he just shrugged. “Why not? We have know each other forever and I promise you won’t embarrass yourself.”

You also thought about it. Was it really a good idea? Definitely not. But then again, why not try it?

“I don’t know, Charles…”, you sighed. “I wouldn’t want it to ruin our friendship, you know?”

Charles nodded understandingly. It was the last thing he wanted as well. He knew it was a thin line they were moving on but if it could help her, he would do anything. “It doesn’t have to”, he said. “We only go as far as you are comfortable with, nothing more.”

You listened and nodded slowly.

“It’s only for learning purposes”, he smirked and when you saw his face you couldn’t help but smile too, shaking your head a little. This was insane, wasn’t it?

“I’ll teach you how to make a man feel good and you can try anything as well, okay?”, Charles searched your eyes for permission.

“Okay”, you whispered and looked him in the eyes.

The two of you stared at each other for a long time but then Charles slowly leaned his head forward into your direction. He held his gaze onto yours as to look out for any sign of hesitation from you.

But there was none. So, he closed his eyes and when his lips were just mere centimetres away from yours he stopped for a second. You on the other hand didn’t want to wait any longer so you closed the remaining gap between you two and connected your lips.

Kissing Charles felt different from kissing any other guy you did before. And you weren’t sure if a best friend was supposed to make you feel like this with just a simple kiss.

He moved his hand to your neck and the other one around your back to pull you even closer. You obliged immediately and leaned into him.

Charles swiped his tongue over your lips and you opened them just a little bit so that he could slip his tongue into your mouth. You involuntarily moaned a little which caused Charles to smile into the kiss.

“Keep making those noises, chérie, that’s a great way to turn us on”, he teased but there was truth behind his words - he wanted to hear more of those little sounds from you.

You couldn’t help the heat rising to your cheeks when he said this. “Quit being a smart-ass and take your hoodie off, Leclerc.”

You don’t know where this sudden confidence came from but you somehow wanted to show him that you can make him feel good.

“Bossy, are we?”, Charles continued and only laughed a little at your warning glare. Nevertheless, he leaned away from you a little to take off his hoodie.

His next words were a little muffled because he struggled to get the hoodie over his head for a second: “Don’t worry, it’s ho-“

As he was busy taking his hoodie off he failed to notice that you were doing the same so when he threw it somewhere behind him and turned to look at you again his words got caught in his throat.

You were sitting in front of him only wearing a black bra to cover your boobs. In all of your years of friendship he has seen you wearing a bikini plenty of times and even sometimes he saw you in your underwear, but never in a context like this. He couldn’t help but stare.

You however failed to interpret his staring correctly and so you felt your insecurity rise up back again. You were about to bring your arms up and around your chest to cover up a little again but Charles immediately took ahold of your wrists.

“Non, none of that, you look beautiful”, he muttered and tried to reassure you with one of his gorgeous smiles. You were sure you would melt if he kept looking at you like that during all this.

“Can I kiss you again?”, he asked but already pulled you into him by your wrists. You simply nodded before your lips were on his again, this time a little sloppier and less sensual. But still, it knocked the air out of your lungs.

Maybe you would regret it later but there was no space in your mind to think about the consequences of your current actions right now. Everything you though or felt in this moment, was him.

Charles laid down and pulled you with him so that you were now laying on top of his upper body. You moved one of your legs over his waist so that you were straddling him. Your lips stayed connected the entire time.

The confidence came back to you as you pulled away from his lips only to press a soft kiss to his jaw, then just below his ear and a few on his neck. This wasn’t new for you but it still gave you reassurance when you heard Charles letting out a shaky breath and a quiet moan.

Charles moved his hands down your back to your hips, squeezing the skin there lightly.

“Are you okay with taking off your sweatpants, let me see you?”, he muttered when you continued to litter his neck with soft kisses.

You nodded and felt his hands make their way past the hem of your pants. You lifted your hips slightly to help him get them over your ass and down to your knees. You sat up to pull them off completely, causing you to sit on top of him in nothing but your black underwear.

The movement caused you to grind a little on his crotch, which you didn’t even take notice of until you heard him curse some word in French under his breath and felt him tighten his grip on your hips again.

“Oh, sor-“, you were about to apologise but Charles cut you off by shaking his head at you. “Don’t, it feels good but I really need you to do something about it”, he said with a smirk on his face. He tried to make you more comfortable and confident.

Charles moved his hands up your back a little to pull you down to his level again. “O-okay”, you just replied hesitantly. Charles noticed, looked at you and brought his right hand up to caress your cheek. “We can stop here if you don’t want to, continue some other time or we just forget about it but-“, you cut him off.

“No”, you said and shook your head. Smiling at him before you leaned down to his lips again. It was rough, both of you moving your lips against each other messily.

“Can I suck you off?”, you asked him between kisses, the sheer innocence in your voice making him crazy. “Shit”, he muttered under his breath, “yes, okay, yes.”

You grinned and gave his lips a quick peck before you lifted your head away from his and dragged your lips down his chest. “But, you have to guide me, I- I’ve never-“

“I got you, mon amour.”

You felt a jolt of heat rush down your body at his words. You knew Charles was sweet, he was a good guy but somehow you always thought that when it came to sex, he was more rough and rushed. But you appreciated him reassuring you.

You got off him for a moment so that he could take off his sweatpants as well. What you weren’t expecting though was that he also took off his boxers in one go, freeing his cock from its restraints. It was already semi-hard.

He was big. Were your first thoughts. Sure, you only had your ex for reference but you were pretty sure he was above average.

You looked at him briefly and he was still smiling reassuringly at you. “Start with stroking it a few times, okay?”, he said.

You nodded and did as he said. Sitting across his legs this time you bent down a little, licked your hand and loosely wrapped it around the base of his cock. You observed his reaction; another breathy moan at the contact. You moved your hand up and down once, twice, and with the third time you swiped your thumb over his tip, eliciting another shaky breath from him.

“Good?”, you just managed to ask and he nodded, “Yeah, use your mouth now, okay baby?”

You tried to ignore the nickname, amour or chérie were a regular by now but this was new. In this context, however, it really turned you on.

You hummed in agreement and slowly moved your head down to his cock, darting your tongue out to lick along the shaft.

“Keep going, use your tongue like that, yeah”, he mumbled. You did as he told you, licking up his entire length a few times before you swiped your tongue along his tip, giving it a few kitten licks.

Your shifted your gaze to look back up to him, your eyes connecting. Charles swore he could have died then and there. For a brief moment the thought of how they were supposed to go back to friends after this crossed his mind. He was unsure if he would be able to do that.

The sight of you like this in front of him sure burned itself into his mind for the rest of his being.

“Feels so good”, he moaned. When he felt your lips wrap around his tip it hit him unprepared, causing him to thrust his hips upwards a little into your mouth.

It caught you by surprise, your eyes widening for a moment. “Shit, sorry”, he started to apologise but you just continued to suck his tip a little.

“You are evil, Y/l/n”, he whispered with a smirk and you smiled back at him, as best as you could with his dick between your lips.

“Can you move down further?”, he almost pleaded. You wrapped your lips back around him and moved them down inch by inch. It wasn’t even half way in but you felt as if you’d start to gag around him if you’d go any deeper.

“So good, use your hand for the rest, if you can”, he said and moved one of his hands to your hair, gathering the strands that fell in front of your face and pushed them behind your ears.

You brought one of your hands around the base of his cock again while simultaneously continuing to take as much of his length as you could, trying to build a rhythm with your movements.

Charles leaned his head back against the headboard, the feeling of both your lips and your hand on his cock almost too much to take.

Sure, he had done this plenty of times before but for some reason this was a lot different, and much more intimate.

You didn’t stop your movements until you felt him twitch inside your mouth, causing you to look up at him through your lashes again.

“Merde, I’m close”, he muttered.

“Cum in my mouth, okay?”, you asked with a hoarse voice, pulling him out of your mouth for a moment.

Charles looked at you for confirmation. “Really?” Instead of giving him an answer you just wrapped your lips around him, sucked harshly once and then went down to take him until he almost hit the back of your throat.

Charles let out a groan and moved his hand to the back of your head, pulling on your hair slightly. This caused you to moan around him, the vibrations of it giving Charles the rest it took for him to release himself into your mouth.

You swallowed all of it without really thinking about it. You licked up his length another time before pulling off him.

Charles tried to control his breathing and when he looked at you again he smiled. “I don’t believe you when you say you never did that before”, he said with a cocky smirk back on his lips.

You let out a chuckle, not sure what to answer. It was true though, this was your first time doing that.

“Well, like I said, my ex wasn’t really experimental in bed…”, you said and looked down again. Charles sat up slightly and lifted to lay on his chest again.

“Well”, he begun as he smirked at you, “he sure missed out on something.”

You couldn’t help but smirk and shake his head at him. “You’re a menace, Leclerc.”

Charles hummed and placed one hand back on your cheek, his thumb caressing the soft skin there for a moment.

“I’m sure you won’t say that again after I returned the favor to you.” There was a questioning tone to his statement and you just lifted your head from his chest and raised an eyebrow.

“I guess we will have to see about that after…”

—————

Part 2 is up!

As always, feedback and reblogs are dearly appreciated <3

[pilfappreciator]

Been seeing lots of Bruce x Reader content which is fine! Great even! But I've seen absolutely NOBODY acknowledged the existence of his fine ass muppet wife so I went ahead and DID IT MYSELF 😤😤😤

Bruce/Brandi x Reader

Includes: GN! Reader, polyamory, lots of MILF/DILF appreciation (as there should be), Vacay Lovers

🧡 Chances are you first met them while visiting Vacay Island. Bruce welcomed you with open arms and that charming attitude of his, got you nice and situated for your stay. Eventually he introduced you to his lovely wife Brandi and the kids

💜 The couple warm up to you pretty quick. You've got a great personality, you never hesitate to help them out around the island, their kids adore you (not to mention you're pretty cute)

🧡 These two are honestly couple goals. Literally soulmates. They're super devoted to one another and its pretty obvious to everyone around that they're meant to be. I mean they literally have a gaggle of kids so yknow they're in it for the long run

💜 THAT BEING SAID!! It'd probably be a while before you three actually got together

🧡 Bruce and Brandi only have eyes for each other (at least at first). Introducing someone new into the relationship probably wouldn't even occur to them unless they got to know that person really well, and even then there'd still be long discussions between the two about whether they're really ready for that kind of change. What it would mean for the relationship, how it might affect them, their family and business, ect.

💜 These two never half-ass things. Both are the type to pour their entire souls into what they deem important so if you're gonna be with them, then you bet your ass that it's gonna be for the long haul. The three of you WILL retire and grow old together okay they will PERSONALLY see to it

🧡 But eventually, after you've known them for a year or two and once they've both come to terms with how they feel about you?

💜 BABES PREPARE TO GET SWEPT OFF YOUR FEET

🧡 These two are the perfect team (comes with co-owning a business and running a family ig)

💜 After years of being the heartthrob of BroZone, Bruce is an expert at putting his natural charm and good looks to use. This man is constantly making time to come over and strike up a conversation. And I think it's universally agreed that the guy is not shy or subtle once so ever, so expect a lot of compliments/winks/charming smirks thrown your way. This man is fully leaning up against the wall beside you, giving you that signature Casanova Smoulder(tm), all while telling you how he and Brandy are planning to add french fries to the bar menu

🧡 "But it's supposed to be a surpise until then so let's just keep this between the three of us. Okay, beautiful?" He says with a wink, raising a finger and briefly pressing it against your lips

💜 You probably shouldn't get so flustered over French fries... unfortunately Bruce is sexy and knows it 😔

🧡 Brandi isn't as on-the-nose as her husband but that doesn't mean she's any less effective. She managed to snag someone like Bruce afterall so you KNOW she's got game

💜 Definitely gives you just as many compliments and praise but she's very like... very nonchalant about it?? Like the two of you will be mid convo and she'll just randomly go "wow you are literally so gorgeous haha. Are you sure you're single?"

🧡 You have about five seconds to respond before she's moving on and telling you all about how one of her sons keeps getting stuck in ketchup bottles

💜 It's kinda hard to tell if she's actually flirting with you. She's pretty laid back compared to her husband and at certain times she seems like a bit of an airhead, so whenever she says something nice, it tends to come off as a casual compliment...

🧡 But then there are times where she'll like? Brush a strand of hair outta your face, or wipe some food from the corner of mouth unprompted, or point out a piece of jewelry you have on by running her fingers over it?? Her skin grazing your own just the barest amount??? All while she's giving you that look??????

💜 This woman is sneaky as fuck ngl

🧡 Expect to hear these two gush about each other on the daily. They are CONSTANTLY hyping each other up whenever they're apart (they're in love what do you expect?), but when you've got the BOTH OF THEM in front of you??

💜 They are a well-oiled machine. You are absolutely getting tag teamed by this duo. By the time you leave their company expect to be red in the face and your heart skipping a few beats

🧡 You get invited to a LOT of family meals. Mostly dinners, but sometimes lunch and even breakfast too. And believe me, there is no such thing as a quite meal with this family. They have 13 chaotic kids who are always getting into shit so expect to come outta the whole ordeal with a few food stains on your clothes

💜 look out for Bruce Jr. cuz that kid will for sure try to start a food fight

🧡 Bruce and Brandi are always super apologetic about any messes that occur (they know first hand how exhausting their gaggle of kids can be), but then you just smile and seem genuinely unbothered? Maybe even amused by it all??

💜 "Babe what's their ring size?"

"Brandi, honey, pretty sure we have to at least take them on a date first."

"I'm just asking for a friend!"

"...Am I the friend?"

"You know you are, babe."

🧡 Yeah if these two catch you hitting it off with their kids and showing a genuine interest in their hobbies/interest/lives?? They are SWOONING, vows are being MADE, rings are being CHOSEN—

💜 If at any point you recognize Bruce from BroZone, or if Brandi brings it up in conversation in an attempt to boost her man's rep, then prepare yourself because Bruce will most definitely start putting on a show

🧡 Under normal circumstances he'd be wayyyy more hesitant. Performing anything from his past doesn't bring up the best memories... but he's willing to bust out a good bop if it earns him brownie points in your book (and it better considering that his wife is always telling him how hot he looks whenever he's doing his "boy band thing" lol)

💜 OUTINGS WITH BRANDi!! This woman is taking you shopping or out to the nearest cafe/restaurant that just so happens to serve your favorite, what do you know! Sometimes she brings you along to meet her friends, all of whom are well aware of your existence wink wonk

🧡 Will swoon and fan herself whenever you offer to pay for things, but like as a joke!

💜 (not)

🧡 Chances are the kids already know what's up with the three of you. Maybe it doesn't click immediately but Bruce Jr. notices that how his parents treat and act around you is the same as they treat and act around each other, he goes blabbing to his siblings and soon enough they're all in on it. They don't entirely understand the complexity of the situation... but they're aware that one extra parent potentially means more presents for christmas sooooo

💜 These little shits are mischievous as hell. They are asking you what your favorite color is just to subtly drop the answer while Brandi is out shopping for trinkets. You mention what kind of music you're into and suddenly Bruce is looking up playlists

🧡 You better believe all 13 of them have started a betting pool going about who will confess first, you or their parents.

💜 Brandi's friends might be in on this betting pool. The other vacationers too

🧡 Eventually (after lots of pining and a fuck ton of patiently biding their time), Bruce and Brandi decide to take the leap and invite you into the relationship

💜 They invite you to dinner. It is a WHOLE ordeal and they've been planning months in advance. The kids are off being babysat by one of Brandi's friends (both parties were suspiciously cool with this sudden course of action). Their business is put on pause with little complaint from their customers (again, suspicious)

🧡 You're immediately drowned in compliments the second you show up at the door. You could legit just be dressed in your pj's and they're like "wow those sweatpants really make your eyes pop 😀" sjsjskakaka

💜 You are being waited on hand and foot the whole time. Bruce is manifesting every ounce of romanticism he can— flower petals everywhere, candles are lit, he's got a ukulele tuned and ready for when he eventually serenades you. Meanwhile Brandi has cooked you a feast made entirely of all your favorites and is tucking little flowers into your hair every now and then. At some point she hands you a cute piece of jewelry she saw while out shopping the other day. Just a little somethin somethin that immediately made her think of you <33

🧡 Overall, dinner is going great! The three of you are having a blast in each other's company and it's refreshing to be able to have a conversation without worrying about rambunctious kids or another pink eye outbreak. The atmosphere is quite yet intimate. Their hard work is not going to waste. You are thoroughly wooed

💜 And just when dessert is about to be served—

🧡 "We think you're really hot."

"Wha— BRANDi! My song!"

"Hmm? OH, was I supposed to wait till after—?"

💜 Yeahhh they kinda fumble the confession ngl. You'd think they'd be smoother but they are both: 1) very excited, and 2) very nervous

🧡 Nevertheless, their point gets across. For a moment they kinda panic because of how quite you are afterwards, but really you're just? Absolutely flabbergasted?? These two hotties wanna date YOU??? FR??????

💜 Of course once you manage to form a coherent response (hopefully a positive one), the couple is literally over the moon

🧡 Brandi's flapping her lil muppet hands all excited like "OMIGOSH THEY SAID YES?!"

💜 And Bruce is just smirking and all like "of course they did, honey, did you seriously think they'd say no to the two of us?" all while simultaneously releasing the death grip he had on his ukulele (this man is a fraud)

🧡 Victory dessert follows shortly after. Your hands become absolutely useless for the next few minutes because these two are DEFINITELY TAKING TURNS SPOON-FEEDING YOU AJSHAKAKAKA

💜 The night ends with the three of you hanging out on the couch, either with Bruce serenading you and Brandi or the three of you just cuddling in a pile (probably both ngl)

🧡 Cue the next morning. The kids come back just to find you all fast asleep in the living room, you in the middle with their parents on either side

💜 Pictures are 100% being taken

I love these two a lot, could you tell?

Thinkin about doing a PART TWO!! Lemme know what you guys think 👀

[silvershiningtarot]

💋👅💋PAC: What Is Destiny Between You and Your FS in This Lifetime?

Disclaimer: These are all SEVEN PILES. About your Destiny with you and Your FS. Remember this is just a general Reading. So take a chance to breathe in and out and meditate on these SEVEN piles.

Pile 1 🌅 Pile 2 🤭 Pile 3 👋🏽

PILE 4 🙈 Pile 5 🥲 Pile 6 💋

PILE 7 🔮

Pile 1: The dynamic between you and Your FS seems to be a mutual understanding. I’m sensing that y’all destiny in this lifetime. You two will go on vacation a lot. I hear “tropical island.” someplace on the island you two will go away a lot. Some of you or your spouses are submissive or I'm getting submissive dominance. Again, your spouse can be just a submissive kind of person. There isn’t anything wrong with that honestly. Haha, I can see a few of you being submissive to your FS. I think they bring this side of you that you let your guard down with them. I heard “safe with them”. You are safe with them. I was right! In this lifetime, you two will feel at home with each other. I told you that comfortability. This is part of y’all destiny. Remember this is just the energy for right now. But the two of you will feel right at home together. I'm hearing “This is where the heart belongs.” no matter what you both have an unbreakable bond and an unbreakable connection as well. So I think your FS or you might be Co-dependence on each other. I feel that It can be healthy. So let's see how you guys handle the ups and downs in y'all dynamic. Wow ❕ if some of y’all don't know what Cloud 9 love is then do your research. But wow 😮 you two will make each other very happy. That's crazy I didn't use my tarot cards but I'm seeing in my head the Ten Of Cups. In the beginning, I feel that it's gonna be mutual between you two. I am sensing that a few of you will have a beautiful mutual connection with your FS. There's a mutual feeling with you both. Both of you will know what each other is thinking. You have a telepathic connection. Both of you will finish each other sentences. This is a deep spiritual romance, which means that you two share a deep bond and you two travel to see each other. If some of you have seen y'all FS in y'all dreams before. Wow, your husband/wife will spoil the shit out of you. I see them buying expensive clothes, jewelry, and Teddy 🧸. I can see you crying cutely because maybe nobody ever did that for you but I feel that you two will pamper each other. I think that your FS likes to be pampered. They just like that. Haha 🙈. I believe that A Few of you will be dating your FS quickly. I am hearing in the next two weeks. So two weeks of getting to know each other then bam you guys going on vacation together, ice 🍨 and having a fun time. I believe that you two will move in together. That's part of y’all destiny in this lifetime. Okay, I had a vision that I saw you two on the couch, I can see them I'm a little nervous 😰 about asking you out. I heard them say “I never felt this way before.” for some of you I can see it. Woah, I had another vision of seeing them buying you a bouquet of flowers, and they are walking up to your front porch wearing a suit and tie and telling you how they feel about you. Aww, I keep seeing the bouquet 💐. Beautiful. Both of you will be doing a lot of inner child healing. This dynamic reminds me of Joan and Ellis in a sense. If you guys remember that show Girlfriends. Watch their kind of dynamic. So I believe that you two are meant to heal a lot together. Maybe, you two will watch TV shows both of you used to watch when you were kids. I'm feeling that. Your Spouse is your soulmate whether it is a friend or family but I'm getting a sense that they are soul family and best friend. Look how fast you two got comfortable with each other. Breath Of Fresh Air This is y'all new beginning. You'll feel better and awaken whenever you are around your FS and Vice versa. Wow 😯 a lot of times you two will skip work and missed out a lot of responsibilities. For example: Your husband/wife supposed to work around 9 AM but turn off their alarm clock. I feel that you both are gonna be doing that. Especially, when it comes to business. That’s why I feel like you two will skip out on work and other responsibilities. Oh yeah, manipulative female maybe, they'll be a manipulative Female in your FS life, or y'all lives. I sense that this female could be gaslighting y'all dynamics. Maybe, it could be jealousy.

Maybe, your FS used to sleep with this lady or hang out with them. I'm getting a third-party situation here but it isn't going to last long. In this dynamic, I can see that your FS will be flirting with you or you'll be flirting with them. Aww, how cute is that? They'll be making corny jokes. Finding ways to make you laugh. They'll be doing anything to impress you. Oh yeah, I had a little vision I can see it right now. So I see you two in the park eating ice cream. I can see them making an ice cream joke. They just put their head down while blushing. Haha 😂 I can see it. It's adorable. Rubbing your thighs or rubbing theirs. I feel that you'll notice that your FS likes you. Yes! Some of you will lose your virginity to your FS. But for a Few Of you, I feel that you won't lose faith in this connection with your FS but you'll be going on dates with them I feel that it will be y'all first time on a date. It's going to feel like a breath of fresh air. They'll make this date special. Making romantic getaway dates for you. Some of you'll be close to your FS. Wow, I can see in this lifetime with your FS it is going to be romantic as fuck. I see them taking you out to fancy restaurants and making your day special for you. Both of you are on the right path with each other. I feel that you two will guide each other on the right path. The second you turn left they'll pull you back in that path. Whenever you're feeling down I feel that your FS will fucking uplift you and make sure you don’t fall back down. Oh, I think that you are your FS divine feminine. So that means in my opinion, I believe that this is your Divine Masculine. The fact that divine feminine came out makes me think that you and your FS are divine counterparts. In this life, you are meant to marry your FS. That is part of the destiny between you and them. I sense that in this life no more second chances for that ex of theirs. Intimacy wow, you two will be bonding with each other. I'm hearing “getting to know each other.” I feel a strong sense of that. I feel that for some of you. Few of you, I truly think that you two will be magnetically attracted to each other. The moment you two meet each other. It going to be like bam! I can hear your FS saying “Who is that?” I can see a little scene where FS you were in some art gallery and they were wearing nice black suits and I see you guys walk inside. Then they turn around and just glimpse at you. You glimpse right back at them. It is like a tickle in your eye. If that makes sense. I don't know if you guys have seen those movies when the girls finally meet their one true love. That's how I feel. They are a player but when I see players I see them as if they like players in video games. Like an old-school way. I feel that most of your FS will be committed to you and vice versa. Wow, even a proposal came out for you! Ahh!!! I'm happy about that. So in this lifetime you and your FS. Are meant to be married even if some of you don't believe in marriage then will change your perspective on it. That's what I feel about it. Haha 😂 wow, I’m hearing “they won’t mind.” So they won’t mind you using their credit card to go shopping or whatever you wanna do with it. I feel that for some of you, this is your karmic companion. But for most of you, I feel this is your life partner. Hmm. Both of you have to make a decision. I don't know what it is but that's between you and your FS. You meant to be in business with them. Business collaboration! In this lifetime you are meant to be business with them whatever it is. Your FS is very masculine that doesn't mean they are healthy masculine energy. If that makes sense. So yes, whatever gender you prefer they are masculine or vice versa. I feel that you two will act like marry a couple when you guys hang out with each other. I feel your spouse will invite you over to their house all the time. You won't mind because you like staying over there. I'm hearing “That's your security.” I'm hearing for this type of love language Quality time is important for you two. Which is a good thing.

Remember you two give each other balance. I feel that you two won't lose sight of each other. Like if you need space they'll give you the space and vice versa. They would want to marry you. Maybe, you two will plan a wedding together. In this lifetime you are meant to marry your Spouse. Yay! Maybe, some of you felt in a past life you couldn't marry your FS because of the interruption so now you can. Oh, counterpart! Yes, I'm excited for you guys. So I feel that you are their feminist and they are your masculine or the other way around. Either way, it is fucking awesome to me. I'm happy about that. This is your other half. Yes! Most of you, I think your FS is famously known. It doesn't matter if they are celebrities. But I feel that they are famously known for their community. Everyone knows their name and they have amazing things to say about them if that makes sense. I honestly, feel right now they are fucking around with other chicks or dudes right now. So yeah, some of your FS is fucking around. Yes! They are your ultimate soulmate. I feel that you two were made for each other. That means your soul was created for them and vice versa. I'm happy to deliver that. Honestly. Good luck to you guys and your destiny in this lifetime. Remember energy changes all the time. So if you two had to meet right now this is what you've been going through.

😍🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈😍😍🙈😍🙈😍🙈😍🙈😍🙈

Pile 2: Your Fs is the type to slow dance and set up the house with candles 🕯️. I definitely, see it happening. I heard “impress you.” I felt that some of you, your FS had a life before you. This means that before you enter their life they'll tell you something about them you probably be shocked or you probably know already about them. Whether it is kids or something else. I can feel that some of y’all spouses don’t have kids. I don’t feel that. But I feel that. See! I think that the universe will leave it up to you. On whatever you decide to do. If your spouse has kids what are you gonna do? Are you going to continue being with them or hit the bricks? Or again, if you have something it is up to your spouse to decide to be with you. Let me just say this as simple as possible. It is up to both of you, free will decide if you wanna be with each other period. Regardless of the circumstances. Whatever if they had a past before you or vice versa. That's the past we’ve all done stupid shit and honestly, no choices that we made were good choices. We live and learn. AWE, the two of you are each other’s perfect match. You equal them and they equal you. If that makes sense. Awe, you've met your perfect match in this lifetime whatever that is. Whichever gender you prefer. Go ahead and be happy forever. So, I feel that some of you will not like them in the beginning. But there is something about them you can't get enough of. That's what I feel. Okay, I don't know if some of you have ever seen The Wizard Of Waverley Place the show. Have you ever seen it? Okay, just imagine if Alex and Justin weren't siblings at all and they met as friends they would get together. What I'm saying is if you guys look on YouTube and watch some videos of them you'll see how Justin and Alex's dynamic is you'll understand the point of this destiny. Anyway, both of you have an odd chemistry. Both of you I feel like you two will argue a lot. Sometimes it will be playful and sometimes it isn't. But I would love to see it. In this lifetime I would love to. Haha 😂 crazy. Your FS dealt with one-sided love before. They've dealt with a lot of bullshit and maybe, that was the life before you came. So they have some secrets you might be like “Oh, fuck.” is that what I'm feeling. Like a Yikes moment. Your FS is your ultimate soulmate for some of you. This is part of your destiny. You had found them. In this lifetime you are meant to be with your match made in heaven. If that makes sense. Now, you two will have an inseparable connection. Can't nothing break you two apart? See! I was right! Most of you I feel that you are going to find your soulmate. Maybe, not your high-vibe soulmate but you are meant to be with your soulmate is gonna make you happy for the rest of your life. I'm getting buddy vibes between you and them. It just means you two will get along very well. They are dreaming about you. I heard “Since they were a child.” they have been dreaming about you since you two were kids. You guys have perfect harmony and you'll see through their bullshit and they'll see through yours. It is like you can't fake it for them. No matter how hard you try to hide your emotions they'll figure it out. I heard them say “You can't hide from me.” I know you will say the same thing to them. They could have a beard. Aww, both of you will be emotionally supportive of each other. They'll be interested in you. I can see you two will be going out on dates a lot. Y'all romance will be blooming. I sense either you or them will try to sabotage this destiny by delaying it. So I felt them working on them pulling you back into their life. Oh yeah, I can see you two hooking up 😍. I feel like some of you I can hear “Ugh, you are such a little devil.” I can hear you say that to them. You'll become an addict to them or it can be vice versa. But you two will be learning and expanding each other's mindset. Or it can be before you two meet you two will be entering a new phase and start preparing for union. So I am happy about that. I think I was right in the beginning.

They are your divine masculine so that means you are their divine feminine. You need to trust your inner knowing (Intuition). You have to trust how you feel. Whoever that it is. Trust that this person is for you. Whoever you are thinking about feeling about or dreaming about. Trust what you feel. I know it is hard we let fear block the opportunities that are right in front of us. I'm sorry for preaching. But I feel like both of you need to trust y'all intuition when you two come into union. I feel even now they are thinking about you now. They do miss you. I feel for this pile. They'll be co-dependent on you. I heard “obsessive.” so it can get unhealthy. That's why you would need space from them. I feel like some of you would need space from them. Few of you, I don't think that you do. But they will miss you a lot whenever you are busy schedule or just hanging out with your friends. They will be missing you. I heard “Their spirit is missing you.” if that makes sense. See! A lot of obstacles you two will be going through together. That's why I say sabotaging. Fuck! There is a lot of blockage between you two. It's like a wall! You are on the other side and they are on the other side of the wall too. See I was right! Crossroad! You two have to decide what you both want in y'all lives. It is like they'll be stuck you probably gonna walk away from them and vice versa. It is like making up your mind. Okay, I think before they had gotten robbed. Like home invasion. But I feel like you two will get into a heated conflict. I'm hearing “It'll be resolved.” you will marry your soulmate for a long time. But I have a feeling that you will have another romantic soulmate that's out there. Your FS will feel like you are a twin flame. So they gonna feel like you two share one soul. I will do a twin flame reading about it. But I felt in my heart that two romantic soulmates would come in. I think that you have to decide which one you will choose. Two romantic people are coming your way. Oh yes, you two will meditate when you wake up in the morning and during the night. It is going to be your two guys' routine. So yeah, in this lifetime you gonna have to choose who. Oh my god, this other romantic soulmate is a Mars-dominant. I'm hearing them say “I always get what I want.” oh yeah! Feel it in my heart this other one isn't going to give up. I keep looking at that card! This other romantic soulmate is a Mars dominant. Oh my god, my question is are you ready for this? You are meant to reconcile with your soulmate again. In this lifetime. Ever one you decide you choose it's your lifetime. I can see a little message. “My beloved, where have you been? I've missed you. I never thought you existed. Forgive me for fucking up. I love you.” Ahhh! I'm screaming. You and your FS are meant to have a boy 👦 in this lifetime. That's part of y'all destiny. You are going to tell your husband/wife or gender fluid you guys are. You're having a boy. Yes! Ahh, I can see that you'll meet them at a dog park. Your dog and theirs will get along. So I felt like some of you will meet your spouse at a dog park. I think this other romantic soulmate is your lesson-learned soulmate🙈. They just meant to teach you a lesson. But they won't give up on you. Oh yeah, your spouse is the type who likes bottom positions better 😘😍😍if you know what I am. They wouldn't mind if they were on the bottom while you were riding them. This relationship between you two it's a never-ending story. Awe, it's a forever in this lifetime. You're meant to be with them. I feel like some of you, your spouse live in the same building as you. A few of you, I noticed that if you decide to move somewhere you'll meet your soulmate in the same building. Either it can be a lesson or romantic. I think that you and your FS are gonna meet through a business meeting. I heard “company.” I don't know what kind of company you'll work at or start working at. I think that whoever does tarot cards or speaks to a tarot reader or psychic reader then your guides would want to speak to you about your person. Your FS

Right now, I think that your FS is trying to connect with their inner child more. So I think that's what some of y'all spirit guides are trying to tell some of you. They are working on healing their inner child. Uhm. Their Ex did something to them that they would rather bury with them for the rest of their lives. I don't know what their Ex did to them. But I hope that they'll tell you real soon. Oh my goodness, they love playing video games. You'll see them playing Mortal Kombat etc. Don't you agree? I sure do. Ohh! For anyone who doesn't believe or doesn't have faith in their connection with whoever. Your FS is telling all of you. As their higher self is telling you don't listen to other readers if you feel like this is your FS then it is yours. Only you have to trust your intuition we as psychic readers are giving y'all our opinions. Trust your instincts. I felt a Few Of You that your FS is slang a big dick. Oh, bust you wide open hahaha😂😂. If some of you out there some weed then this is your FS. This husband of yours will buy you a boutique of weed. Haha 😂 I can see some of y’all pot head happy as hell. Aww, they’ll be the one that will say I love you first. I believe that some of you might say it first but I think in my opinion most of y’all FS is very blunt and brave with their words. They aren’t afraid to speak their mind at all. Which’s good for them. Oh yeah, I feel this other person will come in first in your life and then your FS. But you might be involved with this other person first and this other perosn lifestyle is a bit crazy. I would say. Alright, I felt that some of you may feel in the beginning, that your FS got some cruel intentions because they want to get you pregnant and make you their baby mama. In my opinion, for a few of you I’m not feeling that. Haha 😂 amazing, you two will make like competition tv shows, etc. I can see it happening. Oh my God, this might be very difficult for you. But I feel as though you are going to choose this other husband. So I think that some of you have a two spouse’s I don’t know but you guys have two of them and I don’t know which one you guys are going to decide on in this lifetime. But I feel like your other FS is protecting you spiritually from any dark forces that’s tries to harm you. Oh yeah, you are going to be annoyed with this person and you are going to need some space from them. I’m thinking that I understand this round and round situations. Okay, I feel as though when you are involved with this other guy then let’s just say in the next two weeks your other romantic partner comes in. You are going to be hanging out with them while you are taking space from your other partner. It doesn’t make you a home wrecker. Or anything like that. I feel like you are going to fall in love with this other partner. Alright, they’ll be stalking you on social media. I’m hearing “even now.” So yeah, they are stalking you. I don’t know how but they are. Or you might be stalking them. Aww, the destiny between you and your FS they’ll give you luxurious wedding. They would want to spoil the shit out of you. All they want to do is take care of you. Okay, I feel as some of you, I truly think that this other partner likes to party a lot. So they drink a lot. Tell me what do you think. Honestly, I feel like they don’t want to give up that part of that lifestyle. Okay, I was kind of right in a sense. Whoever guy are thinking about or dreaming about does wants to meet you know. I feel that they’ve gotten readings about you. As who you are and what do you look like? Etc. that’s what I’m feeling like. Yes, in this lifetime both of you are meant to help each other spiritual. You two are meant to ascend with each other. That’s fucking amazing to me. I am hearing you say “I’ve made the right choice. So whatever you decide in this life with your partners you are going to feel you’ve made a great choice. This is what you two remind me of. The dynamic, connection of the whole scenario.

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Pile 3: In the beginning, I honestly feels like it will be on and off between you both. I figure one of you might be detached. Doesn’t want to be in a relationship or looking for one. Which I understand. In a sense I do. I figure that you might be annoyed with your FS. I can see a little imagine right now you’ve got annoyed with your FS maybe, there’s something they say to you or you’ve might of heard of. But you and Your FS in this lifetime is destined to a romance connection. I heard “fall In Love 🥰” I think in my opinion, you’re going to fall in love with them instantly. Don’t feel ashamed about it or anything. You’ve got what’ve been manifesting for a long time. I truly do feel that way. I was right. Praying 🙏🏾 the both of you were praying for someone come into your life that you can just fall in love. Not someone who’s gonna treat you like shit or whatever. But I believe as though. I feel that some of you will be ghosting on your FS meaning detached from them. That’s what I feel for some of you. A few of you, I think that your FS will be the one that doesn’t know how to make up their mind. One minute it’s cool next minute it isn’t. You’re going to be round and round with them. Like that Selena Gomez-round and round. That’s song I’ve heard in my head when I thought of this situation. But this is just beginning. I think that you two are doing some spell love or talking to other psychic readers who are doing spell works for you to bring in your lover. In my opinion, it isn’t bad. The both of you are meant to create a family together in this lifetime. You're meant to build a future with them. That could even mean today, tomorrow, or months from now. That depends on you and your FS. We all build our future in our own way. Honestly, feel as though you two are going to do those old-school photos. Make a lot of memories together. I think that whenever you guys take pictures you won't leave them on your phone you are going to print them out. I have a feeling this pile feels like an old-century life memory. I don't know what it is but that's what I'm getting. Having picture frames 🔲 and hanging pictures up on the walls, rooms, living room, and even through your Spouse office. Or yours. If that makes sense. You'll know your spiritual gift. Or I have a sense that your gifts are going to be activated. Whether or not you decide to activate them yourself. But you'll be aligned with your gifts. I can see that you may have a special place where you go to find your peace. Maybe, on a rock 🪨 or somewhere you find your sanctuary. I feel that you two might've done something you've been regretting. Or they did. So when I saw this card Massive Regrets I thought that they had done something that’s like “FUCK! I fucked up.” I can see them tapping their head like Fuck fuck fuck!! I feel as though in this lifetime your FS used to cope with drugs. I won't go any further than that but they got themselves into some deep depression. It does fucking sucks. Alright, either you or your Fs will be dealing with some crazy ex. This ex is obsessed with you or them. They'll be buying an apartment next door to them. To check to see what are up to. Probably stalking their social media. Or is your ex stalking your media? I'm hearing this ex “Let’s see what are you up to.” Hmm. This ex won't let the past go. Be careful because you might have to deal with them in this lifetime. I feel like that's part of y'all destiny in this lifetime. Don't get me wrong you can change the course of your destiny period. Aww, I think that your FS will be sending you love messages. Oh My God, I think your Spouse isn't afraid of what they send you. I think they are going to show you what they send you. I can hear them say “Here look at what I sent you.” you'll cozy up with them. Both of you are going to read the message that they send you. Awe I can see them kissing your forehead. This FS is very sweetheart. But we will go into the depths of this destiny. You are their Divine Feminine. You are their other half. They've been searching for you. I'm not saying this or it is

True about this but why did I feel like some of y'all spouses could be Chris Brown lol 😆 I mean if y'all are then good! But I just saw him in my head. But anyway, yeah, you are their divine feminine. So that means your FS is your Divine Masculine. What a perfect match. Right now, I feel like you two are feeling under pressure because you two think that you are running out of time. Which isn't true. Which isn't true at all. You're not running out of time. Y'all time isn't wasted. Honestly, time doesn't exist. You can meet your FS anytime. Yes, you have to go through hardship with other people but sometimes they come in when they come in. This is a type of chemistry or a connection it's like love and hate between you and your FS. I don't sense that you fucking hate them but this reminds me of that show Bridgerton. When Anthony couldn't stand Kate he fell in love with her. If some of you don't know about that show. I think I can send you a link to their dynamic on YouTube. This is what I feel like you do them and they do to you. Oh yeah, the both of you will be ending a lot of drama, and losses, and finally finished the past. I'm hearing “the ending.” I feel like your FS is going through a mental breakdown because of this crazy psycho ex. I think they regret it. Either you or your Fs may have a sex addiction. But I don't sense a bad habit. I am hearing “self-control.” Oh yeah, see! I was right! Both of you will say goodbye 👋 to the past, the exes, and old habits of ways. When you and Your Fs get into a relationship it is going to flourish. I have a sense of “fast-paced.” with some of you. But for a few of you, I'm sensing more “slow-paced.” either way that's what I'm getting from it. Ahh! I see that the two of you will be performing together. Whether it would be on stage, perform an art gallery, etc. No matter what you two will be sharing the stage. Oh my goodness, you two will share an everlasting first-time kiss. I can see it. It is a moment that you two will share. Well, I see that you'll be marrying your high-vibe soulmate in this lifetime. No wonder I was picking so many romantic vibes. It's so calm and cool. So your Fs will stalk you on your IG page or whatever social media you do have they’ll stalk you. I'm hearing them say “Eh, just keepin’ an eye out”. In a sense, it's like they wanna protect you sort of way. I hope that made sense. In the beginning, it might start as a situationship. So you and Your Fs could be in a situationship in the beginning. Or in my opinion, dealt with one. This connection leads you both to find each other again. Which is so romantic. I'm getting such a dreamy vibe. Even if some of you, may think that “Oh, it's a situationship.” no matter what it'll never feel that way with you. I sense more you both will be quick to get out of that situationship and start a relationship. If that makes sense. Alright, again, this reminds me of pile 2. I have a feeling that you may meet two people in this lifetime. One is your FS and the other one could be your FS as well. So I have a feeling when this other person sees you. Oh my lord, they are going to tell their friends about you. I heard this other person say “I saw an angel.” Yeah, awe sounds sweet but I don't think 🤔… sigh, this will take a brief moment. Oh wow, I have a feeling that something might happen. I don't know what that is. I can see that face you might make. That fucking “Yikes face” 😬. Okay, some of their asshole co-workers will be talking shit about you. Like “bitch Bye”. Haha 😂 I'm sorry I was in my moment. Anyways, they will defend you. I'm hearing them right now saying “It doesn't matter how the fuck we got together it's none of y'all fucking business.” holy shit! I'm scared to piss this FS. I'm telling you they don't play around at all. I can feel them being aggressive towards people. Including their co-workers. They'll shut that shit down fast. You may meet them at a festival party with your friends or theirs. Oh my goodness, haha 😂 you two will make a reality TV show. No drama I don't feel. But like competition shows.

Other games show. Oh yeah, I can see it happening. I believe right after the meeting you are going to get their phone number. They'll give it to you. Oh. I can see you guys blushing about it. It is so cute. You remind me of a high school girly girl. Maybe, that's my energy. Lol 😆 Alright, I believe that someone threatens your FS in this part of the industry that's why they back away. Somebody threatened your FS that's why they probably don't do what they love to do anymore. Maybe, painting, music, etc. Whatever that is somebody did some shady shit. Okay, see! Yeah, I was right! I told you that you guys will be the ones who will be making the “Yikes” faces. Because you've already fallen in love with your Fs. Since the moment you met them and they met you. Isn't that wonderful? So you may have to hurt this other person's feelings. Oh my god, I don't wanna cry but sometimes shit like that happens. Oh damn, that's hurtful. I've heard my thoughts like “Maybe, they should've made it in time.” Oh dang, bad thought bad thought. 😂😂. So when you two meet each other. The second you guys lock eyes with each other. Bam, you both knew it was meant to happen. This other person doesn't talk to their family or friends. They probably have one close friend. I don't know why but I feel slightly close to this pile. Maybe, a certain message is in there. For me. Alright, they’ll be the ones paying other artists to work with you. Whether you wanna be an actor/actress, Writer, etc. They'll be the ones paying for it. I've heard them say “Whatever you make I make.” I don't know why maybe, this is my vibe, or some of y'all. But I'm heavily feeling like some of y'all might be Chris Brown's wifey here. But that's what I'm feeling like. But anyway, your Fs are exploring their sexuality. Ha, I’ve heard that they have been judged by people. That's lame to me. So they secretly explore their sexuality. In my opinion, so the fuck what. Hmm… your spirit guide is calling you to speak to them about your person. So check in with your guides. So yeah, you and your FS are going through the same situation. Whatever you are going through they are going through a similar situation. 🙈🙈. Yes, a lot of people will support your relationship with your FS. Don't matter what happened. In the past with them. People are going to support this relationship this connection. They'll love seeing you two together. You might meet them through a business meeting. I swear! I don't know what it is but some of y'all meeting y'all crushes or FS through an industry. This is the kind of vibe I'm picking up heavily. Yes! Turn on 🤭🤤🤤. A few of you, your Fs know how to grind their body. They know how to move their body. So imagine in bed🤤🤤. Oh, sexy. I've heard a sex song for them haha. They'll admit to you about their past but they feel like you won't look at them the same anymore. Now whatever your FS tells you. I've heard my guides say “Don't freak out.” don't show them an eww expression because they'll close off from you. It's okay to give your opinion but don't be rude about it or judge them. They are trying to connect with their inner child. Whoever does music whether you are serious about it or not. The two of you will make hit-the-chart music. So I feel like some of you are meant to make music. For some of you, whether you are a rapper, singer, or guitar player. You meant to be in the chart. Or I have a feeling they are meant to help you with your career. Also, in this lifetime you two are meant to be in a partnership. This destiny between you and your FS is all about partnership. There will be certain people who don't want you guys together. I feel like they already call your Fs names. So they'll be calling you stupid for being with them. I'm telling you it’s because of their past. I'm hearing them say “They called me the worst names in the world.” so yeah, they called them bad names. They were going through a stressful evening but it's all better now. I feel that they own a billion-dollar company. They didn't use protection while they were sleeping with their ex.

No worries, I honestly feel like they didn't catch anything. So again, your Fs have some secrets. What's that saying “Skeletons in their closet.” they are a video game freak. They love video games. Play play. They are sending you messages, signs, and synchronicities too. Pay close attention. I can hear them say “I know you are sending message to me. Just know I am catching them.” So they know that you’ve been sending messages from the universe through their dreams. Don't think they aren't listening they are. I believe they are. You are part of their destiny. So in the next couple of months, you are going to meet your Fs. I heard “this year”. So many of you are meeting your FS this year. I am feeling like. Good to y'all. Aww, they'll go all out for you on Valentine's Day🕯. They painted the room red and roses on the wall. Aww, what a dream to be.

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Pile 4: Alright, one of their teammates will be spreading lies to your ear about them and vice versa. They can see you two fighting against each other. I feel like in my opinion, don't listen to them. Whatever their teammate saying about you to them don't listen to them. Oh yeah, your Fs have some bad friends around them. They truly do if their teammate spreads lies about you to them. Alrighty, I believe that you two have to deal with karmic partners before coming into union for some of you. This is your soulmate and both of you are soulmates. I feel in my gut that the both of you have a lot of things that you two need to deal with. So I think that one of their family member or parents isn't going to like you because you're too young for them. I can hear them say “You're too young for them.” they are going to feel like you have no kind of responsibility. In my opinion, who gives a shit about it. They've gotten robbed before. Someone invaded their home. Oh, yeah, that's shit fucking sucks. I’m sorry about that with them. Your FS could be a Virgo sun and they are practical and they like to use big words. I can feel like some of you could be like “Uhm, that's unnecessary.” They are your Divine Masculine so again, they are your divine counterpart. I felt as though they were a little wounded right now. I felt as though some of you were spiritual in your way. I have a feeling that they'll be dropping their religion. I feel like certain things won't make sense. In this lifetime they'll help you learn how to budget and save up your money so you won't be spending so much of it. If that makes sense. In A past life, I've believed that you were a Queen and you were a well-known Queen. I’m hearing you were loved. I think you probably got tired of everyone in your face and craving for something more. What's out there for me? Just me. That is what I'm feeling for you. You've found your spouse on this island and they were smart and they took you on a different adventure. I see that your people have found you and took you back home. I have a strong feeling that you were sad. I don't think that you told your FS who you were to keep that life a secret. You didn't want anybody to know. But both of you fell in love with each other. Since the moment you two laid eyes on each other. I had a little vision in my head that they were building something. Man! They had a nice body but you were like “Who's that guy?” haha. I think that in this lifetime it will be the same feeling as they did here. They feel a bit guilty for doing something that they shouldn't done. I don't feel like they forgive themselves. I felt as though they were excited to meet you. I've heard them say “I hear stories about you.” so I feel as though they hearing stories about you. I think they probably seeing a psychic. But they are having strong feelings about you. For some of you. You know what couple I'm feeling like this pile is. I'll send the link 👇🏾below. These couple I'm seeing. That's how I felt in past life between you two. So many people got between you two. Your lifestyle and theirs. In this lifetime what's part of y'all destiny is that they'll offer you their generosity by helping you with your career. Whatever that career is they'll help you. I can feel it. There is a lot of space in this connection between you and them. There's a lot of it. I can see you being like “I'm done with you. I need some space for right now.” I'm hearing “They won't be alright with it.” Maybe, they won't like the space at all. But at the end of the day make it work for you. So it is okay to need space from your person. Alright, other readers will say that you will get bored with your FS in this lifetime. I can see that you'll make it work with them. So if other readers say that you might be unhappy with them. Then you are going to stay with your Spouse regardless. Everything is free will. A lot of their fans will love your style and follow you on your social media Check what you are doing. But you gotta be a little bit careful. They might be a little bit nosy. So watch out. Just saying

Both of you are on a spiritual journey. You two are on it in this lifetime. I’m sensing that you two were meant to be spiritually awakening. More self-awareness. It is going to take them a minute for them to tell you that they like you. I've heard them say “I gotta make the move.” so what's going to encourage them is that they see you going out with someone else. This is like to me in my opinion, wow dude! Lol 😆. Anyways, they'll be telling you that you are playing games with them. And they'll feel a little bit worried that you won't like them anymore. Your FS will be taking accountability for their mistakes whenever they are arguing with you. In this lifetime you two are going to take accountability for the mistakes you two say to each other. Not every relationship is magical. But if it is worth the battle with your partner. Awe, every time you two see each other, both of you yell loudly and jump for joy. I can see you two seeing each other and saying “Hey!!”. If you guys still doing tarot cards they'll ask you to do their energy. Both of you are very competitive as hell. Whenever you two play video games I can see it. This reminds me of a couple. So I'm gonna put it. These are couples that you two remind me of in a sense of this connection. I am sensing private too. Whenever you two argue one of you will shut down and doesn't say anything. I sense both of you. I feel both of you don't like confrontation. Whenever you two argue I can sense an apology quickly. Both of you will teach each other how to protect each other's energies from anyone who doesn't have good intentions. So, I think that some of y'all Spouse is a bit fucked up. So if you end up with your Spouse then you can get into some deep shit. They are gonna trigger you it's because you have some things that you need to face. That happens. There are a lot of positive vibes in this connection you have to believe it. Yes, every relationship has its ups and downs. You'll be the dominant one in bed. So you'll dominate them in bed. They'll like that. You'll be spanking them and damm! I can see a purple light and whenever that light turns on they know what that means. In your destiny, in this lifetime your fears are blocking you from what you need to see. I feel like whatever is blocking you, take a step back and realize what are you scared of. They'll help you build up your label and bring it like other artists. Whatever kind of label you are doing do it! Some of you, I feel like you will marry your Twin Flame in this lifetime. It all depends on you two. Okay, I feel a few of you, got to be careful. Not a lot of people isn’t going to like you two being together for a reason. I’m gonna address this situation. I know some of you have celebrity twin flames and soulmates. Most of you, don’t. It is fine. Just wanna address that. Anyway, this connection will help you find yourself. I’m hearing “self-love” you’re gonna be learning a lot about yourself through this connection. They’ll ask you that “Will you go out to lunch with me?” They’ll take you out for lunch. Oh yeah, they gonna love taking you out to diners, restaurant, and lunch, etc. I can see them doing that all the time. But this connection involves marriage but it all depends on the two of you. I said it before. In this lifetime all the piles both of you make y’all destiny on whatever that is to be. You want happiness then you are going to get happiness. The person you are dreaming about. Does have to do with your soul mission. Both of you have a lot to create together. I can see it happening. Aww, both of you will have matching tattoos together. It is adorable. I can see it happening. This other spouse doesn't talk to their family. I was right. I feel as though, some of you are marrying your twin flame, and most of you marrying their soulmate. Or it can be the other way around. But I feel like there might be two soulmates and a twin flame that may come in. But then again, I can be overly Exaggerating things. Okay, just feel that whenever you are arguing with your spouse there will be certain issues that you two

Can't over this situation. You two may have to agree or disagree. That's just how energy is for now. Okay, whatever you've done in the past is affecting your future. Remember what I said that your fear is blocking what you aren't seeing. So you have to take accountability. They have been sheltered their whole life. It can be the mindset. So I'm hearing that part of y'all destiny is to get out of y’all comfort zone. Your divine masculine is sending you messages, Signs, and Sync. You need to pay close attention. If some of you are divine feminine then pay close attention to dreams. They are important. Okay, they are sort of immature and you'll check them on it. But they'll get defensive on you. Make sure to always hold your ground no matter what. You're gonna stop them from doing something stupid. I dont know what that is but it is something. They'll need to trust how they feel and go with the flow. Whenever you see them back off from you it's because they don't trust themsleves. I’m seeing like Belle and Edward dynamic as well. Alright, these interviewers will bring up their past in front of you. I think that's where you'll stop them from doing something that is fucking stupid as shit. Ahh! I’m dead-ass gaggin’ right now. Unpleasant surprised 😮 you two will have a baby GIRL! In this lifetime you and your Fs are having a baby girl. How do you feel about that? Very cute. Okay, I think that the two of you will get into some heated conflicts There'll be times that you have to walk away from them and vice versa. Honestly, I feel that way. Because we all say things in the heat of the moment. For some of you, this is your romantic partner's short-term. If you two want to still work it out then that's up to you. If not then it's okay to move forward with your life. Maybe, some of you will feel uncomfortable doing this but they'll take you where they took their ex on vacation at. Just to make new memories with you. They want to share that love with you. I have a sense that your FS doesn't have bad intentions but they wanna reconnect with new memories with someone, they feel as though they can spend the rest of their life with. That's what strongly what I strongly feel like. Alright, they'll notice that you have a commitment phobia. If some of you guys are like that then they'll notice that quick. Aww, I feel this even now I do. But they are writing their thoughts about you. In their journal. I feel as though you are doing the same thing. So guess what, you two are manifesting each other. Aww, so fucking sweet isn’t it.

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Pile 5: Alrighty, It seems that a lot of Hollywood people would tell you not to take that chance with your FS. I don't know why. But I think some of these people don't like your Spouse. Hmm, I have a feeling that your Spouse has a big mouth or it is because they had a past Ex in that type of industry. So again, be careful who you date. But in my opinion, if you fall in with your FS who had a bad past so the fuck what. That shit got nothing to do with your feeling with him. Period. So yeah, in this destiny between you and Your Fs will come at them rudely. I hope some of you have tough skin. These bastard Hollywood fuckers are snakes. I can see your FS saying “It’s okay, I am used to it.” Again, these Hollywood fuckers are bullies. So This is part of y'all destiny in this lifetime. Anyway, when they meet you, I think that they'll tell you when you get into a relationship with them. They'll tell you their secret. They masturbate when they fantasize about you. I've heard “every time.” so every time they fantasize about you they masturbate. I think that they saw a psychic and they told your FS to masturbate so they can bring you into their life. Sex magic does work that way. Aww, In this lifetime I feel like some of you, have some FS Who is a kind-hearted spirit. They are a nice person it is hard for them to stay mad. That doesn't mean using that shit for an advantage. But it is hard for them to stay mad. So whenever you two get into an argument they'll get upset and they'll walk away from you and they'll come back and tell you why they did what they did. Oh yeah! Both of you will take accountability for what you two said to one another. Good! That's good. I'm glad you two are going to do that in this lifetime. Oh, I can see that one of you might shut down all day Either you or they won't say anything all day. I have a feeling it is your FS since they are going to walk away and won't say anything. I think that they don’t like yelling. It seems like their reputation can affect you in some deep shit. Maybe, it will affect your career. If you decide to go with them. Some people in Hollywood won't work with you. Oh yeah, see! Both of you will trigger each other to the limit. But it is meant to heal you and them. But I noticed that again, some of your FS will walk away from you. They'll need a day away from you. It will make you sad. Yes! Haha 😂 you won't get along with your FS co-workers. Including their business clients. Hmm, that's some crazy shit. I don't sense that you'll be jealous but I do see that you'll pick up on some of their energies. Aww, every time you two see each other it is always a joy with you both. I can see you two jump into each other’s arms. Yeah, both of you yell at each other. Not like yelling but yelling as Hiiii baby. Then jump into each other's arms. Both of you are like best friends. Okay, in the beginning, both of you will start as friends. Even friends argue. So they are your homie but they would want to take it further with you. I think some of you might be in a relationship with someone else while your friend is with your FS. But most of you would want to take that road with them but I think that you decide to stay their friend. They'll help you love yourself more. As to where what they see in you. You'll start to put into yourself. Wow isn't that so beautiful? I can see it happening. You'll start to build your confidence. I think that you’ll take their advice too. Oh yeah, it seems that whenever you are around your FS your femininity will start to kick in. Aww, I see that you might be doing a lot of self-care and getting your hair done. Doing things makes you sexy. If that makes sense. They love wearing their suit and tie. Every time you see them they always have a business suit on. I can see you say “Is that all you wear?” which isn’t true but that's just how they dress. Oh yeah, this FS doesn't fucking play at all. I mean damn! I can see that they'll call it quits whenever you are acting immature or too young. Well, I should say petty. Oh yeah, some of y'all FS don't fucking play. I mean damn!

Whenever they see something is wrong I'm hearing “workout” they’ll walk away from you if they don't see you putting in the effort. Aww, I believe when you first enter the room you fucking blow their mind away. Oh my goodness, isn't that so beautiful? They'll buy you roses and all kinds of flowers. I think that whenever you two Get into some kind of conflict they'll want to work it out with you. I feel like in this lifetime they wanna work it out with you. I think in past lives you two didn’t work it out. Oh my God! Haha 😂 this is fucking wow. You'll hide your first pregnancy from the world. You won't tell anyone about your pregnancy. Honestly, for the sake of you and your child's health yeah, I don't blame you. Keep all your pregnancies to yourself. Okay, this connection between you and your FS is a lot of round-and-round. I think that there will be times when you two will need space. I have a sense that this might be your soulmate but a difficult one. I mean no soulmates are easy but some of them are calm. But this one with you two oh my goodness, I can tell that you two will be dizzy. So yeah, either you or them will walk away from each other. I don't think that you two will break up. I don't think that way. But space will be needed in this rollercoaster. Geez. Aww, they believe that you have such a beautiful voice. It is beautiful💋😱. I can hear them say “Wow, you are magical. Your voice is like a siren. Such a mermaid 🧜‍♀️.” Yikes 😬😬. They won't satisfy you in the bedroom. Okay, maybe, that's why you two are going through some issues. Oh my goodness, maybe they like to do missionary all the time. Damn! I don't like it when this call comes out but they do. See! They feel like you are being a bit distant from them. See! Communication is very important. So they are going to know what's going on with you. Aww, you'll be impressed by them the way how they speak to you. Very gentlemanly vibes. But they aren't that good in bed with you. I think you may think that they are boring in bed. Wow 😮 I'm sorry 💔. Aww, that's a song I've heard in my head too. That's how they feel about you. It was like love at first sight for them. Oh yeah, you'll take some space away from your FS but they'll still text you and send you positive vibes your way. Aww, what a fucking sweetheart? No matter what they will always make sure your day is positive and loved. Are you willing to take this step with your true love? Will you though? Oh my God, I love you guys. This is like ❤️ here. In this lifetime what’s apart of y'all destiny is that you two Will decide to choose each other in this lifetime. No matter who else comes in😁. Both of you will decide to choose one another. This reminds me of the movie The New Sequel of the Little Mermaid. I'll send a video. Here. This is how your connection is. I truly do feel that way. This destiny between You and your FS Will catch you by surprise. This love between you and Them is caught off guard. Like “Oh wow.” it's beautiful. I know that some of your FS can't satisfy You in bed which I think in my opinion, they just might. They just might surprise you in bed. But anyway, you two have been manifesting this love for a long time. Now you finally got it. It came to you. In the beginning, both of you are going to be arguing when you two first meet. Oh my goodness, your love doesn't stop there both of you were probably Romeo and Juliet in a past life before. So your love with them is ancient. I know some of you don't remember but it does go way back. I think some of your FS is your twin flame and for most of you, I believe your FS is a soulmate. For some of you, I think that your Twin Flame is fighting back against this other husband of yours. So, this might be a decision you might have to make. Haha 😂 I honestly, believe that is how some of y'all FS is now. I feel that your FS is going to be completely possessive and obsessed with you. This is part of y'all destiny in this lifetime. Both of you will be forgetting about y'all responsibilities and staying home. They trust you and ONLY you. They trust you.

You might be relocating where your person lived. They are moving forward with their life and making better decisions for themselves. That’s good. Hmm 🤔 there are some kind of suspicious things about your FS business. I don’t know what that is but I won’t go any further than that. Oh yeah, it seems that you and your FS will be making out a lot. 💋💋💋💋💋💋. I can hear 👂 one of y'all friends “Where did they go?” oh yeah, you two making out that's for sure. You two like to be alone. In this lifetime you two were meant to marry each other. I think you've tried to marry them in a past life but that shit got fucked up. I can strongly feel that. But you meant to have kids with them. GASP! Oh shit! Didn't it say that your first pregnancy is gonna be private? Bam! See that confirmation. Okay, didn't I say some of your FS is your Twin Flame, and for Most of you this is your soulmate? Look at that this soulmate is part of your high-vibe soulmate journey. They are meant to lead you too. I believe that's part of their destiny with you. Okay, this is kinda lame to me. But they might be in a relationship while they are hanging out with you. So they have feelings for you. I've heard “proudly.” so They Proudly have feelings for you. They could be bald or shave their head bald 🦲. Or cut their hair short. Things can change. See! For some of you, I feel that you are marrying your Twin Flame in this lifetime. This fucking twin has a lot to do with your past life. I don't know what it is but it is something. Hmm, I think right now as we speak something is keeping you and your FS away from each other. Yikes 😬😬. In my opinion, be careful with whom you share your readings too especially if some of you have celebrity husbands or wives. Be careful. Yes, your FS is older than you. I honestly, feel that way. But I feel like there is a slight chance that they can be a little bit younger than you. I don't sense hella younger but young. I sense early 20’s like 23 or 24.

Pile 6: In this lifetime, I have a sense that both of you will forget about y'all responsibilities. I have a sense that you may say “Oh, another time.” and then you gonna keep doing it. It is like every time. So you may have to be a bit careful especially, if it is work. I can tell that you'd like to stay home with them. Oh yeah, I can tell that this FS will be very hasty with you. So your FS is going to be completely possessive and obsessive of you. I noticed that they might be unhealthy. The destiny between you and them. Your FS is gonna be completely possessive over you. I have a strong feeling that this FS isn't playing at all. I am getting a rush vibe from them. They'll say yes to you. For example “Do you want to go out?” FS: “Yes”. Like they are so with the speed with you. Anyway, they could be thin. Like medium size. Right now they are a bit jaded because of what they are going through at the moment. So their mind isn't clear. Alright, I think that when you meet your FS you might've thought to yourself, do you want to go down this road with them? I can see you walking back and forth with this. The reason why I said that is because I won't lie to you, your FS might ask you for your number when they meet you. Like before you leave the building. They'll ask you out of hangout with them. I've heard them say “I see what I want and I'll take it.” so this kind of FS knows what they want. They aren't afraid to take what is theirs. Your Twin Flame is fighting back against your other FS so you two won't meet. I have a feeling that for this Pile. This is your twin flame period. This love between you and your Twin Flame is surprising. I heard “forbidden love”. I felt that certain people don't want you two together. It is going to happen unexpectedly. I know for this one it is tough as shit! Especially, if you are dealing with a twin flame. But I have a feeling that this is part of y'all destiny you are meant to be with your twin flame in this lifetime romantically. You may get into an argument with them at the first meeting. I heard “approving a point.” so they might prove you wrong about them. Maybe, you have some kind of expectation about this twin of yours or their lifestyle. Then BAM! They shut you up. Oh yeah, I feel like this twin is confident about their intuition about you. Whew! So here is their message to you. “Trust me, believe me when I say I am the man you've been thinking and dreaming about. I know it has been a minute since you saw my face but I am always fucking yours. You can bet your sweet ass I'm yours. You may not think so today or tomorrow but it'll come.” Damn, I since a lot of confident vibes from this twin flame. Wow. Anyway, I sense that you two won't give up on each other. No, you won't. Maybe, some of you don't believe in your twin flame connection anymore or just hiding it. But this is part of your destiny with them. You can change different directions but you cannot change certain things in your soul contract with them. You can be 50 years old you'll still have to go down that road or in next life you may have to do it with them but just in a different form of yourself. See! Yeah, you're marrying your Twin Flame 🔥 in this lifetime. So again, your FS is your twin. They have a lot I mean A lot to do with you in the past life. I don't know what that is but if you want a personal reading on that. Here is my link. Anyway, so they might be in a relationship when you meet them. I have a strong sense that when you do meet them they aren't in a relationship with their person. I've heard “sleeping with them”. Your FS could have a darker skin tone. They aren't too light or brown skin but dark brown or dark. Aww, this dynamic between you and them is like Mavis and Johnny. Aww. Let me show you guys a video. Your relationship dynamic reminds me of them two. It's like once you two are alone with one another you see a whole different side of your Twin. Okay, your twin flame is your Divine Feminine. So if some of you are divine Masculine then you are meeting your other half. Which is your Divine Feminine.

Again, they have a lot to do with you in this past life. I don't know what it is but it is something. Huge! It is like something very important you cannot ignore. You can't. At the moment they are mentoring someone else right now. I can see another message they wanna tell you. “Hey, You! Why are you doubting yourself? Did I hear you losing faith? Huh! I wonder why. You are a fucking beautiful Angel 😇. Heaven ain't got nothing on you. You were made to lead for yourself and us. You and I are a team. Trust me, I know it's hard for now. But You will have everything you want including me. Tell me do you believe? I wish I could give you something to believe. But no worries I hope this message helps you.” Wow, they don't like it when you doubt yourself. They see you as perfect. I see you helping your community out. Especially, if your community is struggling you are going to help the struggle. Proud of you. 🙏🏾💋They have an ego problem. Their head is fucking huge so you know that people kiss their asses. But you ain't gonna do that. So of course they are going to be saying “Do you know who I am?” Like ewe, I don't care who you are. Make sure you check them on it. Uhm, they are still a little bitter over their ex. They are trying to move on from it. But this fucking Ex must have hurt your Twin. Oh shit, I wish this card didn't come out. But their ex did something to your Fs they would rather bury it. I'm sorry about that. Oh no! That shit made me mad 😡 this is very bleh to me. Okay, this is none of anyone's business. But oh well, they weren't using protection while they were sleeping with their ex. Hmm.. It seems like spiritually your Fs warning you about this new guy that's coming into your life. That's why they are protecting you even now when a new guy comes into your life. So if you are in a relationship with someone else right now. I feel like your Twin Flame is telling you something about this new guy. So be careful and smart. Alright, I feel like you'll be the one that might start shit with them. I don't think you are a drama starter. Bam! Both of you will have y'all victory together. It is going to feel like a FINALLY! You two finally made it to the end. Through all the ups and downs might as well just finish the race. So that's what happens. I think that you and your Fs have a lot of lessons to learn together in this lifetime. This is part of y'all destiny. I know it feels like a big fucking UGH! But honestly, you don't want things that are too easy. You would want a balance. A lot of people will support you guys' relationship. Oh yeah, it seems like your friend is gonna catch you two having sex in the bathroom. Oh Whew! Dang! Anyway, they currently aren't feeling themselves right now. So they probably going through some kind of healing process right now. This relationship between you and your Fs will bring a lot of people together in harmony. I sense that a lot of people would want y'all relationship. I can tell that they would. I just think that some of y'all Fs are going through some hard lessons with themselves. If you have been dreaming about your Fs lately or you've been dreaming of them for a long time. Then they have something to do with you on your journey. Both of you are meant to create something together. Hmmm. I told you that they are going through something personal. So I think right now they trying to figure out whether or not to cut this friend off. Since they have known this friend for a very long time. Both of you grew up kind of “tough love” in the household so I feel that both of you have this survival mentality. This connection involves marriage. But it all depends on you two. So it is up to you and your Fs if you two decide to take it further down the line. If that makes sense. Oh yeah, so your FS has some unhealthy habits. To where they'll punch someone in the face if they see talking to someone else. I have a huge sense that your Fs have some huge trust issues. Remember what I said earlier that they can quickly be obsessed with you. Then your Fs reminds me of an old soap TV show. Called the

Bold and The Beautiful. Deacon and Sheila. If you guys don't know these characters there is a link below you should check it out. I have a feeling that your Fs have a dark side that they tap into a lot. I don't know what it is but they got this high-ass adrenaline. I can feel it. You give them this excitement in their life. They have been looking for. I've heard “mystery”. Oh yeah, both of you will meet at a festival party whether you are performing or hanging out with friends. But you are going to meet them there. I heard “unexpected surprise.” it is going to happen unexpectedly. Ahh, remember what I said before they are feeling a bit jaded, look at that. They are finding love again. They are calling you again back in their manifestation circle. Whoo. You may not want kids with them. I don't know why maybe, you are set on your mentality that you don't want kids period. Set a timeline for yourself. In my opinion, don't do that! Because at the end of the day, you have lessons to learn with your kids whether with them or with someone else. But for some of you, I felt that you are having kids with your Twin flame. Your twin is your Fs. I think that they may have kids already you'll be done with it. I'll raise their kids. In my opinion, you are braver than me. Lol 😆 just kidding. This relationship will help you two heal a lot of y'all trauma. I'm sorry but I'm calling you out on it. Most of you, have a lot of emotional fears. That's something you two are blocking from one another. Like they are block emotionally, but I do sense that they are trying and you just staying that way. It keeps you safe but their more discovery with your emotions that can help bring in the people who want to love you including your Fs. I think that they are in a new relationship but they aren't taking it seriously. But they have a new girlfriend but I have a sense that it is just dating for them. Oh yes, both of you are ready for union. I say go for it!!! Be ready for this union that can help you two grow and become better.

Pile 7: In this lifetime you and your FS will become trillions. Wow, that’s cool. They are a bit pushy because they want to make sure that you have everything you want. I sense a fighter. Oh my god! Haha, having sex with your Fs is going to be fucking mind-blowing which I believe so. Haha 😂 awesome. What's your destiny between you and your FS I have a sense of feeling it is high-school sweethearts for some of you. Right now they are trying to connect with their inner child🥲💕. They probably watch Disney movies and childhood movies. They grew up watching. Whenever you get detached from them. I sense that they might be annoyed by you. “I can't win with you. Ugh, what did I do wrong? This is why we aren't working because you are so stubborn as hell. Help me understand this shit. I'm your partner so let me be your partner.” Oh yeah, they are the type to like the bottom position if you know what I mean ladies and gentlemen.🤭🤤🤤. So their energy right now at the moment they aren't feeling themselves. So even when you are with them it isn't you it is just them. Oh yeah, I think your Fs go both ways. 🙌🏽 good for them. I think that your Fs are in a relationship with a man and they are exploring their sexuality. Should I say? They are curious. So they'll tell you about their experiences with their boo-boo. Haha 😂 how lovely is that? Oh yeah! Your Fs is a fucking freak! Ahh! I am fucking gagging. Yes 👍🏽 so they'll eat your pussy while you in a bubble bath. Oh yeah, soak your pussy in their mouth 👅. Oh yeah, that shit giving a bitch wetty wet. You'll meet them in a library 📚. They probably like to read or just like to be in the library by themselves. I heard “Sanctuary.”they do a lot of sex magic to bring you into their life quicker💋. Masturbation is important to people. Do some play play. Even to just make yourself feel good. Oh okay, so in the beginning, you two won't immediately like each other because you two are having a bad day. So you two will be playing a lot of mind games with one another. They are indecisive themselves. So they'll be like “I don't know”. You may get tired of it and vice versa. You and your Fs are going through a similar situation. Oh yeah, you might be like “Ugh Why?” things happen sometimes. Oh wow, they are your spouse they want to make it known. “Hey, cupcake 🧁 just gonna say it one more time to you. I am your Husband/wife. I mean I know I haven't proven it to you or been my best but I'll do whatever it takes to make you happy forever.” In the beginning, I don't think they ain't gonna like how prude you are at first. Because you know your Fs is a beautiful person so they'll be bitches throwing themselves at them. Awe, when you two do meet both of y'all eyes just lock in with one another. Isn't that crazy? Amazing isn't it? Okay, your Fs isn't a celebrity. This is cool 👍🏽 you don't want any celebrity all the time but I do feel in my opinion, everybody has a connection with a celebrity regardless of some status that is attached to their name. Sorry for ranting. But anyway, they are well-known in their community. See! There is a lot of physical attraction between you two. Oh my goodness, it isn't that exciting. Eep! Aww, you are their divine counterpart. 🔥👅. I can tell there is some passion with you two. I was right! They have this deep love and affection for you. Awe, they'll curse out their fans for you. I hear “neighbors.” so if anybody tries to mess with you know not to step close. This connection with you two will help you both grow and it is a lot of work that needs to be done. You'll have to make the effort to work with them. I'm hearing “a lot to handle.” hmm, at the moment they are scared 😱 they are trying to take a different direction. Okay, I have a feeling that some of you, don't have a celebrity spouse. A certain amount of you do have celebrity spouses which is cool. Oh yeah, fans will DM you rude messages and keep on bothering you. I see why your Fs curse their asses out. I think their fans are tough. But aren't part of your destiny but these fans are going crazy.

After the meeting with them, you'll leave a huge impression on them after the meeting. They'll never forget your face or what kind of feeling you give them. Okay, your Twin flame is trying to connect with you and talk to you. So you may not fuck with your twin now or you spiritually blocked them. These are a couple of you two remind me of. Oh wow, they are deciding in their next life they want to be with you. I'm hearing “That's a promise” Oh yeah, until death, they are making that as a fact. Yes, so whenever you are starting up your business you are fucking amazing and you'll start to make it happen. Remember what I said earlier? Well, this is why. They are deciding if they want to be with you romantically. I don't know I had a vision I can see them walking back and forth in their living room. Hitting their fingernails. It must be a tough decision. Oh yeah, your Fs hits 👊 hard so you'll be scared for them to fight someone. I think that you'll know how your FS gets. Okay, a lot of Hollywood stars will tell you to not go out with your Fs because of their past. Honestly, doesn't matter what these people say or who you can love. You probably won't get along with one of your Fs family members. So I had a vision that you tell your Fs saying “I don't like her” It's probably because you two had a past life before. I don't know. Smooth aren't they? They'll convince you to go out with them. You probably have been saying “no” so many times. I heard “not ready.” you probably aren't ready to go on dates with someone. Wow 😮 they'll be the ones to expose your pregnancy all over social media. “I’m gonna be a Dad”. Awe I can see them jumping for joy. Both of you will trigger each other but you two must heal one another. Call out their triggers and yours. I can tell you two arguments aren't pretty. It going to be a lot of disagreement. But you'll love them and they'll love you. They'll praise you all the time. Give you compliments. I can see it happening. Oh yeah, a lot of positive vibes in this connection with them. It just takes a lot of effort. See! A lot of your fears will be blocking your happiness and them too. You won't be able to see what's right in front of you if you don't surrender. Oh yeah!! Remember, what the fuck I said! Haha 😂 I cannot with myself. You and your Fs family have some unfinished business. Something has to end with their family member. I don't know what it is but it is something. Aww, y'all daughter in Stars or the Galaxy is sending you and your Fs messages including now. They are working on getting her parents together but she is feeling a bit ignored by you both. Maybe, you need to do a reading on your kids. I think you may start dating your friend first. I heard “hangout” so I feel like you won't be interested in a friend like that but I do see you hanging out with their friend. Oh my goodness, I think that you two are social media couples. I don't see much privacy for you too. So you two will post a lot on the IG. I mean wtf! This card loves to come out. So yeah, both of you are each other's Divine Counterparts. Both of you can do slow-paced or fast-paced. It is still a perfect match. I'm hearing “compliment each other.” I feel that's what you two do for each other. They may have twisted braids or you could or their friend. It can be either or. Oh yeah, there is a lot of running away in this connection. I can tell. Geez, I sense a lot of scariness from you and them but from you too. I don't think you trust easily. You have a hard time. I hear you say “People don't get me.” you've been disappointed by people before. Relationships you probably think to yourself you don't know how to be a girlfriend. I can hear your Fs say “I don't know how to be a boyfriend either.” partnership is responsibility. But even though two of you will go through your ups and downs. This still is a beautiful connection 📶 relationship. You'll let a lot of your walls down with them. See! You two are meant to make a lot of money 💵 together. Help each other build a business with one another. Oh, sexy, goddamn!

I can tell that you two will be hot and heavy. That's the song I heard in my head. So much passion with you. That's why I feel like you'll get instantly pregnant with them. It doesn't matter how old you are. It feels like this is kind of the same pile I just wrote this on. Hmm… weird💞. In this lifetime you are going to be your FS fiancè. So yeah, it is going to feel like love at first sight with them. You two will be planning out your wedding. I don't sense anything too major. But small. I heard them say “She finally said yes”. So it is going to take you a minute to say yes to them. I feel like you are going to surprise and shock them. Aww, both of you have been written in the stars. I think when you are with them you'll start to trust your instincts better. Ask yourself is this what you want? Do you want this? You can change your destiny but there is something for you it is going to happen regardless of how you change the rotation. Okay, your FS is your Twin Flame. That's why the ups and downs and running away. Whew, there is a lot of that. Running away. You two are intense. I see that you two share a lot of harmony. Oh yeah, this is your soul family 👪 oh my goodness. I don't know why but I think I might cry 😭 they are part of your soul mission and vice versa. They are part of your destiny in this lifetime. You are marrying your soul family. They will fully complete you and vice versa. Even if you are with someone else at the moment they'll wait until it's their turn. They know you are their true love ❤️ why not be with them? See! Again, you'll feel happy with them and it is like again, and you'll feel complete with them. You just have to give it a chance. Whoever you are thinking about this person has a lot to do with you in a past life. I don't know what happened but there is something. I'm hearing “It never got completed.” so there is something that never got completed for real. Hmmm… I think your Fs are fighting back against your other FS from the spiritual realm. I don't know what's the issue here but it seems like they are a little bit scared 😱 but I don't see these other Fs lasting long in your life yes! Promotion your career is going to take off with them. I see that in this lifetime, you two were meant to work together side by side. Manifesting abundances! I think y'all manifestation is going to happen so quickly. Aw 💞💞 that's the song I'm hearing. I feel that most of you will be meeting your ultimate in this lifetime. Whether your twin flame or soulmate you're gonna be with them in this lifetime. It is a headache but it is worth the risk.

[mitsies]

❊ miss americana & the heartbreak prince - itoshi sae . . from one formal to the next, everything works out one way or another

your first junior high dance is in the company of your best friend, itoshi sae.

you had to try hard to convince him to go. really, really try to convince him. and you had to get his mom in on it, too, that's how hard you had to try. he was content to stay at home in those stupid little red basketball shorts that he either 1), never washed or 2), had 7 pairs of, binging sports highlights and discussing things you don't care all that much about on the couch.

but this night was special, you'd insisted. it was the very first dance of the very first year as official junior high students. you were both 11, practically ancient, and how boring would it be to stay home when there were adventures to be had? and besides, you had a plan. tonight, you were going to tell your best friend since diapers that you had a super-uber-mega crush on him, and maybe give him a hug after (if you were feeling bold.)

you have it all planned out. after finally managing to convince him to come to the dance with you, you'll steal him away from your friend group and take him to the hallway next to your maths class, where no one ever goes. and then, you'd tell him about how mieko told you that mai told her that akane told her that keiko told her that she thinks he likes you back, and then you'd ask if it was true. and then he'd say, 'oh my gosh, yes, i love you,' and then high-five you, and then you'd be boyfriend and girlfriend. because that's how it works, right?

well, you made it halfway-ish. and to say that is just to say you managed to force him to the dance and sneak him off into the side hallway. oh, he looks cute. he's shorter than you but that's fine because he'll get taller before you guys get married. and his hair is gel-slicked and looks kind of silly, and you know it's his mom's doing. his suit is frumpy and ill-fitting and he's wearing cleats instead of dress shoes because that's just how junior high boys are.

he's been grumpy all day, as per usual. but you keep catching him staring at you. and he keeps doing that little tiny smile-ish thing that he does, where he smiles a little but not a lot so he just looks constipated instead. and oh, you're in bad luck, because as soon as you're in that maths hallway and the music from the dance goes muffled and it's just him, and it's just you, you seem to forget everything you've planned to say.

"what did you want to tell me?" uh-oh. uh-oh, this is bad. oh, it's so bad. your best friend since diapers, your future husband, the one person you could never get sick of, was going to think you were an absolute idiot. how embarrassing! how embarrassing, oh no.

"uh," you can't meet his eyes, and choose to fiddle with your fingers instead, pulling at your sloppily painted nails (green to match his eyes, like asami had insisted), "well— um, i actually— i just— to.. um."

wow, this was lame. you're 11 now, where is your class? where is your wisdom? oh, how humiliating. "i just—"

"you like me."

you pause. you stare. he stares back, and his expression goes from that same old neutral to that silly little stupid kinda-smile. and then, panic sets in.

"oh, haha! i do? who told you that? who? no seriously, who? or, or, what made you think that? why do you think that? i— i don't like— or, well, i don't not— no, stop, stop, actually. who told you? was it akane? oh, i knew akane was a snitch! ignore her. ignore this. i mean, unless you— but. hey, it's—"

"so you do, or don't?"

this was sae. this was itoshi sae, and this was how he's always been. no-nonsense, straight-froward, abrasive, blunt. all hard around the edges but so, so soft at the center like those really good cookies they sell at the cafeteria. only for you, usually, and his baby brother, and that was pretty much is.

sometimes you forget just how much you like him. it's a lot, you like him a lot. so, so much. he's the same boy who meets you on the side of the curb when you call him crying from the home phone, because your parents are angry again. he's the boy who will spend forever with you working on your maths homework when you're having a hard time understanding. he's the boy who will split a cafe cookie with you after he sees you in the stands of one of his games. oh, he's that boy. he's the boy you super-mega-ultra liked, and maybe-kinda-sorta loved a little teensy tiny bit. you exhale.

"i do."

your voice is small. your hands twist together anxiously and you can't do anything but stare at the floor. and in your peripheral vision, you see little red cleats take a hesitant step closer, and closer, and then— a hand lands on top of yours.

oh, it's sae's. oh, he's holding your hand.

well, not really. but it's close enough, and you look up and his cheeks are rosy and he looks like an angel, oh lord, he's so cute you might be sick. all he says is, "good. me too, or something."

the very first middle school dance of the year is where itoshi sae stops being just your best friend, and becomes your boyfriend. and that word changes meaning over time— years go by. somewhere in that mess, there's a tentative kiss, and a whole lot of 'i love you's' and a dozen more firsts, all with each other, all with a world of love. awkward pre-teens go to teenagers. how lucky you are, that mieko told you that mai told her that akane told her that keiko told her that she thinks he likes you back. because she was right after all.

it's your boyfriend who asks you to prom. and you’re mad at him, but you say yes anyways.

it’s the first time you’ve seen him in weeks. prom night is the same night he flies back in from spain for the holidays, and coincidentally, the first time he’s talked to you for more than 20 minutes. you pick him up from the airport in your dress, and he’s in his suit. you’ve already missed your dinner reservations— you’re trying not to care. but this was your senior year. and you were so, so excited. the restaurant was his favourite kind of food, and it was in an aquarium, and reservations were hard to get, and he had caused you to miss them because his flight was delayed.

you know it's selfish. you know, because how could you not know? how was it his fault that the weather in spain was so poor that he was forced to wait at the airport longer than expected? how was it his fault that it just so happened to rain? but the evil, burning, and bitter side of your heart replies: it's his fault he was gone in the first place. it's his fault he was in spain and not by your side, to begin with.

normal 18-year-old couples don't have to take a 16-hour flight just to see each other, your anger says. and you know it's right.

when itoshi sae, at 13, told you he was going to be a star, you hardly believed him. actually, you recall your own incredulous laugh, and that cute way the space at the corner of his eyes wrinkle when he's annoyed. you didn't believe him, but then less than a year later he was gone to spain hellbent on becoming the best.

he used to call you every night for hours. as often as he could, he'd call or text. and he'd talk to you in the way that he only talked to you. with a softness. with a tender kind of love. the infinite kind. and whenever he got the chance to fly back, he would, to spend time with you and rin and his parents, but mostly you (as he'd tell you after he made you swear not to snitch). he used to love you, and act like it.

but as years blurred past, and he got taller (not by much) and you both grew older (not by a lot), things shifted. changed. spun in a circle and landed facing the opposite direction. he called you less. sometimes, when you called him, he'd not pick up even though you knew he was free. and he visited less, and he stopped talking to rin but wouldn't say why. sometimes when you'd visit his mother, you'd see rin stealing glances at you from the curves and corners of the house. he stopped saying hi to you a while ago, too.

you drive to your senior prom in near silence. there's some music playing on the radio— nothing either of you had put on, just the default top hits of 2017— and no one says anything and you think that might be better. because you're thinking about the way he used to buy him and his little brother ice cream on really hot days with his very own pocket money, and you think if you hear his voice you might start ugly crying and ruin your makeup. and then you think about how it's your senior prom, and you're about to cry, and your boyfriend can't even look at you, and oh, you're holding back tears all over again.

the first thing he says to you that night is, "i was about to do that," when you open the car door by yourself. you are so, so angry. but you just smile like you're not, because it's not his fault you resent his leaving. it's not his fault you miss his mom and brother but can't visit anymore without it being awkward. it's not his fault he's gone, and it's not his fault he acts like he hates you. it's not his fault but you despise him so, so much.

he puts a hand on your waist as he walks you towards the venue— some stupid country club kind of thing, you didn't care enough to read anything but the address. his touch feels wrong— it didn't always. but these hands are rough, and you don't recognise them. you stop walking.

all around you, everyone keeps moving. there are girls in frills and pretty, glittery, long dresses. suits and ties, and the smell of cologne, and the floral perfume. it's dark out, now. and the people aren't walking into the building— they're leaving. you catch someone's watch out of the corner of your eye. you've missed your senior prom.

"what's wrong?" sae's voice hardly registers. you feel the tears fall.

"we missed it."

"hm?"

you turn to him. he looks like he couldn't care less. and you abhor him.

"we missed the dance."

sae blinks. his eyes are blank— maybe they've always been. maybe when you were 11, you were too dumb to see. maybe he's always hated you, you think, because he replies, "oh. back to the car?"

and you're really crying now, because he doesn't even care.

you can't manage words, not until he speaks for you. "don't cry. it was just some stupid school dance."

you wonder what this looks like to people. a boy, looking like he couldn't care less. and you, makeup streaked with tears, like your world just collapsed.

"did you really care that much?"

"did i care?" your voice comes out mangled, "did i care?"

he looks startled at your reaction, the most emotion he's shown tonight. you continue:

"of course i cared that much. of course i did. because how long ago was our last date? the last time we did anything together? the last time you could look me in the eyes? of course i care. not about this stupid dance," you're out of breath, but you continue, "i care about you. you, i care about you."

he looks the same amount of placid, and the same amount of blank. and you'd cry harder if it didn't hurt so bad. he says nothing so all there's left to ask is, "but do you even care about me? do you care anymore?"

his face betrays nothing. and you're taken back to juvenile days, and ice cream and sun, and soccer practice after school, and annoying little brothers and love notes in lockers. and you think that this is not the same boy you loved. and you don't know where that boy went, but he's not here, he's not the one standing in front of you staring instead of holding you while you cry.

and he doesn't look the least bit sorry.

you knew the answer to his question before it even came out of your mouth. maybe you've known for years. maybe you just had blind faith in him, and your aquarium-restaurant reservations, and a stupid, cheesy, lame high school dance that you couldn't care less about to prove that there was still a tiny bit of hope. but it'd just shown you that there was nothing left.

you feel like a set of bones beneath a dress. you feel like a ghost in a crowd of people. you feel like a spectacle, you feel insane. you must look it, too. maybe you are. there is a coldness to sae's voice when he finally speaks. a coldness that is new. that you haven't heard before. you're scared.

"are you done yet?"

you're not crying anymore. you're just feeling strange.

you hate how you care about how sae's going to get home when you leave him standing there and walk back to your car. your shoes— bought just for today— tap on the pavement. the shoes and your heartbeat. your car's engine. the doors slamming shut. people laughing outside. the radio's top hits of 2017. that's all you hear, that's all. and when you get home and turn your car off, you sit in the driver's seat and cry.

you can hear all your thoughts. you can hear the ugly desperate cries clawing your throat raw like an animal. mascara-stained teardrops land on your dress and trickle down your chin, and burn your eyes. you don't know when you lost him. was it when he'd first went to spain? was it when he'd first cancelled a visit back, or hung up the phone? or was it before then? has he ever liked you, or did he only hold your hand back at that middle school dance because he felt like he had to? and your tears taste like melted ice cream and memories, or maybe you're just crazy.

you loved him. did he ever love you?

angry tears. sad ones, too. your hands need to destroy something so they pull and clench and squeeze your legs through the fabric of your dress as you dry-heave. the ache is not empty. it hurts, it burns. your lungs burn. your heart is heavy and hot and disgusting. how you feel is wrong. everything feels wrong.

everything feels wrong, and now you're single on prom night.

what's even left for you, now?

being 21 is weird.

you're all grown up, now. you've got friends, and you have just recently landed a job at a big journalism company while you wrap up university. and today's your first day going out to a company event instead of sitting at a desk all day, and you're so excited.

the event is some kind of gala. you've been told it's to celebrate the opening of a new sports thing that your employers have invested in that you don't really know too much about. and it's not quite your specialty but you'd never miss out on an opportunity to dress up and get a free fancy dinner as a representative for your company, who were big investors. you wonder who'll be there. who are some sports people? actually, what kind of a stadium was this? a baseball field? is that even a stadium?

why were you even invited? you don't have the slightest clue about this investment. but that doesn't matter, because you're there now, stepping out of your company car in a pretty dress that you'd chosen for yourself. you wonder when the last time you've been this dressed up was. maybe your cousin's wedding, when you were 17? or, you think with a twinge of something bitter in your chest, was it your senior prom at 18?

whatever. it doesn't matter. you don't care about that anymore— it was only the night your boyfriend of 7 years essentially told you he didn't love you anymore. no big deal. you were 21 now, and you could do cool things and work, and stuff. how cool is that? how cool are you? too cool to be still caring about your ex-boyfriend. your very handsome, attractive, professional football player ex-boyfriend, who was on the cover of every sports magazine, and the headline of every news channel. you wonder, as you walk in, how many of the people under the roof of the venue know his name. how many who'd probably kill for a signature. you wonder what they'd think if they knew you used to be the one to love him.

pause. why were you thinking about this? you don't care, you definitely don't. you're done caring when he's probably already forgotten your name. god, you're supposed to be 21. you're 21, and you still feel like you're 18. you're 21, and you still feel like you're 11. at what point are you meant to grow up and get over it all?

you shake your head and your older colleague ms. sato gives you an amused look. "something wrong, dear?"

"nothing," you smile at her awkwardly, "just a little nervous. i've never been out on a company event before. who else is going to be here?"

ms. sato tsks and thrums her fingers against the wrinkled skin of her other hand. she's wearing a conservative green velvet dress. you think she looks pretty. "i think more sponsors will be there. and i'm sure they've got some sports folk, too."

you purse your lips. the venue is big, and ornate, you see as you open the door for ms. sato and walk in behind her. red and gold walls, chandeliers, a regal display of wealth that you most definitely could not live up to if you were here on your own dime. and the dining hall is no different. tables with nameplates written in some fancy scrawl that you can barely read spell out your name and ms. sato's name across from each other towards the front of the hall. out of curiosity, your eyes flicker to the seat to your right.

and your heart stops in its chest.

in that same hardly legible font, reads a name that is all too familiar. it's nearly the same as the name you'd scrawled on love letters in junior high, and nearly the same name as the contact you used to text every single day and every night. it's nearly the same name you'd call out at airports, looking, always looking, forever longing to be around him. the name on the nameplate reads 'itoshi rin.'

"are you sure nothing's wrong? you look pale." ms. sato's voice cuts through your thoughts, you clear your throat. "of course. it's nothing, ms. sato."

you pull her chair out for her before taking a seat in your own, as the room starts filling in and someone says something about a prepared meal being served at 8 on the dot, and announcements starting soon after that. you feel frozen in your seat as you fidget with your hands in your lap. you're paralysed with fear, too scared to check if the name next to rin's is sae's. it couldn't be, right? because they fell out. just like you and sae fell out. they wouldn't attend the same event. plus, sae's always thought that events were boring. fancy dances, fancy dinners, they were all the same— all wastes of time. he wouldn't be here.

it hits 8. you think you could maybe handle rin— but he doesn't show. dinner is served, and the two seats to your right remain empty. and you are so, so relieved internally because who are you kidding, you couldn't deal with rin, let alone sae.

you see his face everywhere, and that's enough. magazines, underwear ads, video edits, all of it. his fans are everywhere. like he's some kind of hero, and you guess he is when it comes to football. you wonder who he's kissed since you. unless what was a weird thing to think about your exes. in that case, you don't wonder that at all. and you never have, not for a second.

it's 8:05. still, no one has shown. at 8:10, the owners of the stadium give some speech about investments, and blah blah blah, are you meant to know or care about any of this? because you don't know, and you don't really care. you're much too focused on the food, and the stress, and all that. 8:20, speech is over. 8:30, people start socialising. 8:35, drinks are brought out with a second course. 8:40, with a little champagne in your system, you're feeling pretty good, actually. less nervous, for sure. if rin hasn't shown yet, he isn't going to. and sae? that was basically fully off the table now.

8:45. you feel better than fine, now. 4 champagne flutes down (because ms. sato doesn't drink, but felt bad saying no when they were offered, and she thinks you'd be a funny drunk) and you wonder why you've ever felt nervous in your life, ever. stress was a thing of the past. ms. sato laughs at you when you make a face at something someone annoying and snotty says, and she slaps your back and tells you she's going to the restroom and to make sure you don't die while she's gone.

8:50. the door to the banquet hall must've opened at some point, but you didn't notice until the chair to your right slides out. your heart sinks before you even see him. because itoshi rin, in the flesh, takes the chair next to you.

you haven't seen him in years. not since your 18th birthday, you think— because his mother had made you a cake and forced him to tag along to drop it off for you. he'd told you happy birthday, and you'd teased him about how you remember he used to have big cheesy smiles and bigger cheesier dimples when he was just a little baby, and he'd scowled and told you that he's 15, not some kid. how old was he now? if sae was 21, then rin would be 18. you've seen him places too, on advertisements for some football program, on sellouts for cologne and such. he's made a name for himself. for himself, not his brother and himself. you'd find it in yourself to be proud if you weren't a little drunk and a lot sad.

maybe he catches you staring from the corner of your eye after he sits, because he glances over and does a double take before looking straight ahead like he's in the army and his commanding sergeant's just told him to look alive. you worry at your lip with your teeth. you'll regret this in the morning. "rin? 's that you?"

he stiffens. you try not to giggle, and you think you fail. "yeah."

"i hope this isn't weird. do you remember me?" it's more of a question to yourself than anything. but he answers, because it was said out loud so he probably thought you were talking to him and not to your own brain. hm. maybe you're drunker than you thought.

"yeah." his response is terse and awkward. but then he says your name. and you remember his little voice a hundred times higher, and you remember tears in his big toddler eyes webbing his lashes as he cried your name about a scraped knee. you soften. "i've missed seeing you. how've you been?"

he looks nervous. does he look nervous? or do you just think he looks nervous? he opens his mouth, then closes it, then replies, "good. i didn't know you'd be here."

you smile amicably. oh, you love this boy, love him like he's your sweet little brother even now. "i'm representing my company. they— or, we— are investors. i'm here as my mentor's rubbish bin for food and drinks she doesn't want, basically."

rin snorts. you want to pinch his cheeks. would he be mad if you did? probably. "well, i—"

the seat next to rin's slides out. another full champagne flute is placed in front of you and instead of thanking the waiter, you feel sick to your stomach. junior high dance sick. senior year prom sick. you're sick.

itoshi sae sits one seat away from you.

you're sick, to your stomach. you're silent and stiff and stupid, so stupid, because you thought you were over him. but this is the first time you've seen him in person since the year 2017, when he flew out to be your date to your school's prom, and then flew away that same night and never came back. you down the champagne and close your eyes. you're 21, not 18, not 11, you're 21.

you're 21 and itoshi sae's still got you acting like a fool.

the rest of the dinner is awkward and silent, at least for you. ms. sato shows up and strikes up a conversation with anyone who would listen, and rin listens, and you can't look at sae so you don't know what he's doing. but you can imagine him sitting there, bored. why was he there? rin and him don't talk anymore. or do they? it's been years, after all. you guess they've made up. your stomach churns. ms. sato notices but doesn't say anything, not until after the dinner ends and you practically race out to the company car without another word to rin, just a quick, tight, smile. over his shoulder, before you leave, you see a mess of reddish-brown hair. you think you might be sick. you hope there are barf bags in the car.

"now, dear, what is wrong with you?" a patent red leather handbag slaps your lower back as you wait outside for the driver to show. ms. sato gives you a look.

you blink a few times. "did you just hit me? that hurt, i think."

"answer the question, child."

you wince. "the boy next to me was like, my, like, brother-in-law but not actually."

ms. sato raises a brow. "itoshi rin? the professional football player?"

you nod fervently. "yes. him."

"so.. you used to date itoshi sae?"

you look at her blankly. "how did you know?"

"they're famous, dear."

"oh," you wrinkle your nose, "right."

ms. sato chuckles. "well, we've got time to talk. tell me the story."

and you tell her. you tell her everything, and a little more. about ice cream, and your 18th birthday cake, and his mom, and his hands, and the way he used to love you and the way he just stopped one day. normally, you wouldn't run your mouth like this, you'd like to think. you're more refined. but the drinks you've had are working hard, and your emotions are working harder, and oh, you're a mess. at least you don't look like one tonight.

ms. sato listens patiently. or maybe she's just doing this to laugh at you about it later. but she listens either way. she smiles at some parts and frowns at others. but when you're done vomiting up all your words and all your feelings, she just sighs. "7 years is a long time."

you blink. "yeah. i guess so, yeah."

"and so is 18."

"excuse me?"

ms. sato chuckles. "you said you've known him since you were babies. it ended when you were 18. you said you loved him until you were 18."

"oh. i did. yeah."

"and 21 years is even longer."

now, you're really confused. "21?"

"21. because you've loved him since you were babies, and it never really ended."

oh. oh, okay. you don't know how you feel, not in the slightest. you're confused and you're nervous, and you shouldn't have eaten all that food because now you might actually throw up instead of just feeling like you're going to throw up.

and then someone calls your name from behind you.

the voice is familiar, and you turn without thinking, of instinct. because you'd always go to him, no matter what. and that scares you, and you're even more scared because you haven't seen eyes that blue in forever.

"sae." you try to keep your voice curt and calm. he's in a suit. it's a good one. tailored. and he still looks young, and handsome, and like your lips would fit perfectly against his, and like your hand could feel right holding his, and all that. and you're so, so scared.

ms. sato excuses herself in the background somewhere, and all this is eerily familiar. people in dresses and suits, leaving. cards driving away. your heartbeat in your ears. it's all familiar.

he takes a step closer. you take one back. he stops, stares, and says, "how've you been?"

you know him well. you know this man far, far too well. you recognise the clench of his jaw and the set of his brows. something like determination paints his face. you'd be more confused if you weren't so nauseous.

"good," you test your voice, continuing when you hear it hold steady, "i'm good. and you?"

he opens his mouth to reply. but you open your mouth again. because you can't seem to do anything but run your mouth today, it seems. "actually, i was hoping you wouldn't be here. really, really hoping. because," you laugh, "i did not want to see you today. or ever again, really."

sae's expression would be unreadable to anyone but you. but you can see it. he's hurt. and you laugh again because god, what does he have to be hurt about? you continue, "i was fine with just seeing the magazines, and ads with you half-naked, and all that. and i was fine with hating you for hating me. but now you're here and it's all different and wrong, and i'm so mad at you right now, and i was fine an hour ago before i even knew you were going to be here. i was so fine."

he blinks. "are you drunk?"

snorting laughter, you turn your head. you can't look at him. you can't tell how you're feeling anymore. "sure i am. the drinks were free."

his eye creases in a tiny smile and you'd swoon if he wasn't the same person who'd broken your heart after he'd held it in the palm of his hand.

you wonder what he's going to say. would he tell you you're being dramatic and making a scene? that one was likely. would he sue you?maybe. maybe he'd kick you. maybe you'd throw up on him. maybe he'd cry. you smile a little— you'd like that, actually. would be funny. you'd enjoy it.

"i'm sorry."

you must be making a face. you must look confused, or disgusted, or disgruntled, because he explains, "for vanishing."

itoshi sae apologising was not on your list of possible responses. you are at a loss for words. but you find them after a beat of silence, "you're sorry?"

he shifts uncomfortably. "i am."

scoffing, you roll your eyes. "funny."

"i'm serious." sae steps forward again. you don't back away. you can't, and he continues:

"i left you. and that was," he pauses and breathes, "the worst thing i've ever done. every day since then, i've missed you."

sae really hasn't changed, because that's all he says. so blunt, so forward, so harsh. never any room for detail, or explanation. never any time. you're silent so you think he might take that as a cue to keep going.

"i fixed things with rin, too," he says, "and i wish i could say it was out of the kindness of my heart but it was because you always told me i should. you've always made me better. and i—"

"you couldn't stand that." you're so angry. at him, for coming back and apologising like it was all a small deal. you're angry at ms. sato for getting you drunk. you're mad at yourself, for loving him so much even though it's a weak excuse of an apology. "oh, you couldn't stand that i was making you kinder, or better. you never wanted to be good. you've been horrible, always, probably."

and then you stop. "no. no, no, i'm sorry. i don't— i don't think that—"

"it's okay. however you feel about me.. it's okay. you can hate me. it's okay."

and your resolve crumbles.

"i could never hate you," you whisper, "because i love you so much. always have, for so many years and however many days, and i've loved you when you were good or bad or both, or neither, and i'm so mad at you because i never stopped, even when you hurt me. even then."

sae is silent. you are too. people move all around you. they're not listening, they have places to be. because you're 21, and they're all older too. and they have things to do.

"you still love me?"

he sounds quiet, almost. meek, maybe, if that was a thing that he was capable of being. you are doing your best to hold in tears.

"yeah," you say, "yeah, i do."

sae looks at you. "i've never stopped. i never could. i tried. but i never stopped loving you. and i've never been good at showing it, but it's the truth. and i'll be sorry forever, if you'll let me."

this is so unlike him. but people change, and you suppose you've been too separated to know anything as of late. your heart aches. his eyes are still the same. his voice is a little deeper. his shoulders look more broad. you think you're in love again. you think you never stopped being in love. you know it.

"so show me."

and sae kisses you. you hadn't forgotten how good a kisser he is but you think he's gotten better, as his hands find your back and yours take his jaw. maybe he's kissed other people since you. now you're mad again so you kiss him harder, and deeper, and you would usually have more decorum but it's sae and he's famous so if he doesn't care, why should you?

there is so much left unsaid. a hundred things. a million, maybe, a billion. he will spend his life making this up to you. you know he will. but for now, there's no hurt. for now, there is just love that has been cut off for far too long. for the first time in years, you're alive at this moment. you're 11, and 18, and 21, and you're everything that he's loved, and you're everything he's touched, and you are everything to him and you feel it. you deserve this. your blood runs hot, his tongue is in your mouth, you need this. and you love him. you love him to death.

this kiss is the summary of years waiting, and years longing. it's the summative point of ice cream and bike rides, and late night car rides and study dates, and running mascara and lonely nights. this kiss— it's been a long time coming.

flowers chosen: pink camellia & lilac . . longing & joy of youth

❊ send a request! ❊ 5k masterlist ❊ event info ❊

[honnelander]

surprises

WOW OK i can't believe i did this!! i needed a small break from my writer's block with Sanji and wanted to try my hand at another opla character that i find really interesting! and cute i'm sorry this was a lot of fun to write and i enjoyed the change of pace so i hope you enjoy! if you want to be tagged in any of my work, please read this

gif credit @zsuo

WARNINGS: none

word count: 2k

pairing: opla!buggy x reader

summary: reader is on 'clown duty' on the Going Merry while the crew searches for Nami, but the more you talk with Buggy, the more you realize you like him.

masterlist

taglist: @yarnnerdally @miloonmetis @fa1rybubbl3z @feelinmatcha @buggy0827 @uncomfortableshoelace @notasgard @deserticwren @shadydeanmuffin @ohsilk @antrenna @laviiv

Ok, you’ll admit it, you’ll finally admit it. You were finally going to admit to yourself the tiny, stupid, and annoying thought that has been plaguing the back of your mind for days now: 

You thought the clown was hot. 

Even saying that small, little sentence to yourself in your mind made you cringe and want to smack yourself into next week. 

You thought the clown was attractive? Buggy the freaking clown? Buggy, the flashy fool? Buggy, the... what, something-something jester? The guy that constantly wore that silly circus make up all the time, so you didn’t really know what his face even looked like exactly? The person who rivaled Usopp in always having the most shit to say? It was ridiculous.  

What was even worse, was the fact that he was just a head at this point, he wasn’t even a full person with a body. You had no idea what the rest of him looked like and you hated the fact that you were just so god damn curious to find out. It was embarrassing- you were attracted to a literal talking head! 

Apparently though, the rest of the crew had said, sans Sanji since you both had joined Luffy’s crew at the same time, that this Buggy guy was bad news. Why exactly? You didn’t really know, but it had something to do with Buggy attempting to drown Luffy to obtain the map to the Grand Line and decimating a town a couple of weeks ago. 

But it looked like that warning of ‘Buggy is dangerous’ had turned into ‘Buggy is just annoying’ since all he was now, at this point in time, was just a talking head that never seemed to shut up. That talking head, however, was your crew’s only ticket to find a rogue Nami so you all had no choice but to put up with his antics. 

“Can’t you just tell us where Arlong is?” you asked the clown head offhandedly one morning out on deck as you sharpened your daggers. “Without, you know, all the theatrics?”  

“God,” Buggy groaned, rolling his eyes to the heavens. “Are you deaf or are you just stupid?” he asked exasperatedly as his head hopped around and turned to face you. “For the millionth time- I can’t just tell you where Arlong is. My powers don’t work like that. I’m not a compass or a map.” 

“Well, actually, you kind of are, aren’t you?” you asked curiously with an eyebrow raised, not put off by his rude tone. “I mean, think about it,” you started, pointing the tip of your dagger to look at him. “You could like, ‘leave’ a toe or something anywhere you wanted to remember a certain thing or place, and you could then just... sense where to go to get it back. Exactly like a map.” You were silent for a minute as you went back to sharpening the blade. “But I guess you already did that, right? Since that’s how you found Luffy at the Baratie?” you asked with a thoughtful hum. 

“Wow,” Buggy laughed condescendingly. “You’re a real sharpshooter, aren’t you? Thanks for that master analysis, captain obvious. What do you think I’m doing right now?” 

The corner of your mouth twitched upwards. “Acting like a map to get your body back,” you answered without hesitation and a twinge of smugness. “Maybe you should be called ‘Buggy the Map’ instead. It has a nice ring to it.” 

The clown’s patronizing smile dropped, his expression deadpanning. “Haha, very funny,” Buggy said in a humorless voice. “And here I thought you weren’t anything more than just a pretty face.” 

Your eyes darted to him, quickly scanning over his expression to see if he was seriously calling you pretty or if he was just joking. When you saw no hint of sincerity in his green eyes (wow they were pretty), you cleared your throat and refocused your attention back onto your blade.  

“Yeah, well, I’m full of surprises actually,” you said matter-of-factly without thinking, your mouth having a mind of its own. Your eyes widened slightly, your line of sight not budging from your dagger as your hand running along the blade stilled for a second.  

Were you flirting with Buggy?

Were you insane? 

Buggy’s attention was already wandering but at your choice of words, his eyes snapped right back to your face. For once in his life, he was at a loss for words. “Uh... ok?” He blinked. “Like what?” 

You felt your cheeks flush slightly, running your sharpening stone along the blade at a quicker pace. “Wouldn’t you like to know.” 

The clown furrowed his eyebrows, scrunching up his face in confusion as he looked at you. He felt like he had entered the Twilight zone or something.  

“Uh, yeah. You’re the one who brought it up, sweet cheeks,” he said as he watched you intently focus on your task at hand. Buggy then quirked an eyebrow as he added in snooty tone, “Well, whatever ‘surprise skills’ you have can’t possibly be knife sharpening because you’ve been working on that same blade all morning.” 

Shit. He was right, you realized. You had been out here longer than you initially thought and had been working on the same dagger ever since you sat down with him.  

In a quick attempt to hide your embarrassment at being called out, you swiftly sat up and stabbed the tip of your small blade into the wooden barrel next to where his head was. “Watch your mouth clown!” 

But Buggy didn’t even flinch. “Pfft, nice try sweetheart,” he scoffed. “But blades don’t scare me. I’m immune to cuts, remember? I’m literally just a head right now.” 

Crap. He got you. Again. You leaned back in your seat, pulling out your other blade to sharpen.  

“Oooo, another dagger, huh?” he asked with feigned interest, catching your gaze. “I guess you really are ‘full of surprises’,” he teased with an overly flirtatious tone and an exaggerated wink. 

At that, your face reddened. You knew he was just joking, but the combination of you admitting to yourself that you found him attractive coupled with his flirty teasing and that wink... it was causing your heart rate to accelerate like you had a schoolgirl crush.  

And crushing on Buggy? The talking clown head? It was just all too ridiculous. 

You resumed your blade sharpening ritual, trying to pretend like he wasn’t affecting you. “Well, I did tell you that, didn’t I?” you asked, trying to turn the tables back on him. 

Buggy was silent for a beat as his eyes regarded you. HIs voice dropped an octave lower, intentionally or not, you weren’t sure, as he said in a more earnest tone, “Yeah... but I didn’t think it was true.” 

Your eyebrows shot up at hearing his admission, his tone surprising you as you quickly turned your head towards him. When you saw the look in his eyes, the way that he was still staring at you, it caused your heart to skip a beat. It was like he was seeing you for the first time, really seeing you. 

‘Being more than a pretty face’ wasn’t something you took lightly; it was something you lived by. It had become your mantra of some sort. Your whole life, you were underestimated, rarely ever being taken seriously because you ‘had a pretty face’ that you could ‘coast by’ on. People (men) always assumed you were too dumb to understand things or be smart and have talents because you were pretty, and it absolutely infuriated you.  

You shook your head, clearing up those thoughts. You didn’t feel like delving into that right now and especially not with Buggy of all people, so instead of biting back, you said with a curt, humorless laugh as you went back to your blade, “There’s always more to people than meets the eye, you know.” 

Buggy let out a snort, his green eyes looking towards the sky for a second. “Yeah,” he agreed. “No kidding.” 

Both of you became quiet, a few beats of strangely comfortable silence passing between the two of you before you broke it. 

“But probably not with you though,” you joked. “You’re probably just all clown, complete with bad jokes and questionable make up. And,” you looked at him, a spark of mischief in your eyes, “you’re probably not even that tall.” 

You hoped to God that Buggy really did have a sense a humor and that your playful jabs didn’t go over his bandana cladded head because you really didn’t want to make an enemy out of him. And if he didn’t get your sense of humor, then you and him probably would never work out anyway.  

Your stomach fell to your feet at the thought. What were you even saying?? Jesus, you really were delusional. The quicker you guys found Arlong and split ways with Buggy, the better. 

But of course, the universe had different plans for you, because Buggy did in fact have a sense of humor and took your mockery of his height in stride. 

“What- not tall?? Please,” his voice becoming playfully haughty. “Just wait until you see my body, sweetheart. I’ll be looking down at you, telling you the best jokes you’ve ever heard in your life with some fresh clown make-up on,” he said, winking at you with a click of his tongue. “I call it ‘the Buggy trifecta.’” 

You looked away from him, hiding your flushed cheeks as you shook your head, a smile on your face as you opened your mouth to say something back when Sanji came up to the upper deck, a small smile on his face when he saw you and effectively cutting off your banter. 

“Ah, there you are y/n!” the blonde cook called out. “I’ve been looking for you. I didn’t realize you’d be out here on, uh,” his blue eyes darted to Buggy for a nanosecond before looking back at you, “clown duty.” 

Buggy scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Well, good morning to you too, happy feet.” 

Sanji glanced at Buggy again, furrowing his eyebrows for a second before shaking his head once with a blink and letting out a small sigh as he turned his attention back to you, deciding it wasn’t worth it to argue with the clown head. 

“Yeah, so, uh, anyway,” he said as he put his hands in his pockets. “Breakfast is ready,” he relayed, jabbing a thumb behind him. “I wanted to let you know before it got cold.” 

“Hey, what about my breakfast, blondie?” Buggy complained. “I might just be a head right now, but a clown’s gotta eat, you know?” When he saw the questionable stares from you and Sanji, Buggy shook his head. “Don’t ask me how it works,” he said before either of you could say anything. “But it just does. I still get hungry and need to eat.” He looked back up at Sanji, his green eyes expectant. “So how about whipping me up some scrambled eggs, huh?” 

Sanji blinked. “Oh, well, sure-” 

“I got it, Sanji,” you said, cutting off your lifelong friend. You stood up from your seat, sheathing your daggers back into their holsters on your hips. “I’ll make you some eggs Buggy.” 

“Ooo, look at that,” Buggy laughed. “You really are full of surprises, aren’t you?” he asked, wiggling his eyebrows. 

Ignoring the questioning look Sanji was giving you, you walked past the two men, well, man and talking head, and started going down the stairs. “Here’s another surprise: I’ll cook you your eggs once I’m done eating, in like an hour. How does that sound?” 

“Whoa, wait, wait, wait! I didn’t mean it like that, y/n!” Buggy quickly backtracked, trying his best to smooth things over with you as fast as he could. “I meant that as like, a good surprise! Really!” 

You smirked to yourself, finding it funny how quickly Buggy switched up his mannerisms in order to get what he wanted. “Sanji, you’re on clown duty!” You called out, tunning Buggy out, leaving him begging and pleading with a confused Sanji, who was wondering what the heck he just witnessed between you two. 

[kalims]

cupping their face

parts. one , two , three , four , five , six , seven

characters. heartslabyul

content. gender neutral reader

riddle

he has very squishable cheeks despite his concerning diet mainly revolving around tea, biscuits, and whatnot (tarts).

you suppose the chubbiness in it comes from the mounts of sweets he can't exactly resist. of which trey is probably to blame.

riddle grew up with his very picky mother with her particular food choice for him so when he arrived in NRC without her eyes he gained a lot of freedom.

so if you hold his face in your hands the fat from his cheeks pokes out of the hole between your thumb, and pointer fingers. it's so cute 😭 so you can't resist the urge to sneak a squeeze.

it makes it all the more comical becomes he looks so confused, furrowing his brows at you like he can't believe whatever the hell you're doing right now.

plus points if you start to randomly caress his face cause he's slowly realizing that this is just a show of affection and is turning more red by the minute.

it would be a flustered riddle without the steam out his ears after all!

riddle avoids your eyes. "what in the world are you doing?" but makes no move to... well, move.

trey

uhh compared to riddle he's not in that level of squishy cheeks despite him being a baker and all.

I mean it's more of a 'you can feel the curve of his cheekbones' rather than the 'chubby cheeks' kind of thing. let me tell yall, the muscles in those damn arms aren't there for show!!

but yeah I firmly believe he just takes bites out of his batter / finished product to check if he should add a certain ingredient from the taste.

but it's usually the other people that do the eating.

though if you pinch hard enough you might be granted the satisfaction of smothering his cheeks (and a trey who is trying his best to keep the increasing pain off his face cause you seem to be enjoying yourself too much.)

anyways yeah cupping his face! from my memory, to me he seems like a person with a more lean face? (I have not seen him in a while lmao) but when you do he just raises his brow a little and watches you patiently.

you won't know if he's caught on what you're doing but you'll know he's starting to enjoy it when your palms are growing heavy from trey slowly leaning the weight of his face on it.

"is this a reward for my hard work?" trey huffs in amusement. "tell me when it's too heavy."

cater

wow he's so cute 😞

cater likes to snack every now and then and all that food just teleports to his face rather than anywhere else so it's prominent even if he laments about it.

I think it just makes his smile cuter cause you can see dimples pop out of his cheeks as well 😭 it tempts you to poke them all the well.

notable. they're also kinda stretchy, you can poke, pinch, and stretch them wow. the versatility. at this point everyone should have a cater to poke, pinch, and stretch out his cheeks.

^ stress reliever.

as you're cupping his face his response is just to automatically cup you back? and he's already giggling about this 'couple bonding' thing so you're not quite sure how to proceed.

but cater's laugh is pretty contagious so you end up laughing along. both of you are cupping each other's face, and you can feel the curve of his grin from your palms.

... next thing you know in a poof of smoke two more cater appears wearing similar pouts, of which are whining about their turn..

"you guys go away!" the cater which you remember to be the original dramatically pours himself over you. arguing with.. himself. "this is og cater and (name) bonding time, shoo!"

ace

is his cheeks squishable or not? we will never know cause everytime your hands are near his face he's flying backwards to avoid you.

what a menace with the suspense and all. ace is always trolling you so it's understandable. he's like: "haha get trolled." AND WHEN YOU ACTUALLY IGNORE HIM HE'S LIKE: "wait no that was a prank too pls."

if his ego wasn't taller than him he definitely would have regretted it 💀 honestly I'm so in dynamics with ace where he thinks he's the dominant one in the relationship and if you tell him to sit he's immediately sat.

it's gonna be more of a challenge to actually get a hold of his face but pro tip: just tell him to stop with a stern face, and he's just gonna go stiff but grumble when he feels your fingertips.

he's looking annoyed the whole way but you notice the twitch of his brows. suddenly he's looking just a little more comfortable in your hands.

point it out it out if you want but his face is just gonna revert to that annoyed look, just honestly let him loosen up (and loosen up he will, don't be surprised if he just starts demanding those face caressing thing you just did in the future.)

^ well he's only doing that if you initiated it a handful of times. if not he's taking that desire to the grave.

"wow. are you really that much starved for me?" ace smirks, and nods. probably praising himself in his head. "just keep doing whatever you want, I don't care." ???

deuce

the most squishable cheeks. I take no objections, I do not care ‼️ (even though certain official art might not say so) I bet he eats with a mouth full of food, it just inflates his cheeks lol.

if we have characters we call baby girl like jamil over here, we got deuce spade our resident baby boy.

probably the one that eats up all your attention even if he's embarrassed. not of you of course! but if you ever do public displays of affection he's just hyper aware of the eyes kqbsjajss.

but he likes you a lot so he just tolerates it <3

cupping his face hmm... honestly he looks like a very innocent puppy, he's watching you with those kind of eyes. curious and patient 😭 he's watching to see what you'll even do next.

he doesn't really speak. was this man even actually a delinquent before? who the hell was that cause all you know is this very endearing, shy deuce of yours.

if there was a tail it would be wagging slowly!

man the inner man is him is wrestling him rn cause where is his pride?! but the person it's fighting is his love for you so the inner man is losing lowkey 😞

"..." there is no words, just a very flustered, pleased deuce.

end notes

trey the gentleman fr.. also ace's part is vv chaotic lamao

[yongislong]

staring + dreamies.

genre: when you catch the dreamies staring at you hehe, fluff, suggestive but not rly pft

note: hiiiiii... how yall doinnnnn.... :D

mark... genuinely cant help it LMAOO he cant!! he just needs to look at you sometimes. brings him a lot of comfort. you have also gotten used to him spacing out and looking your way while you just sit on your phone or laptop. his hand finds itself onto you hair/head every once in a while. is so considerate so he would for sure fix your mascara, lipstick or pick off an eyelash if he "saw something on your pretty little face" hehe. used to get flustered when you caught him staring but has grown more confident and you've grown used to him needing a glimpse of your profile huehuehue

renjun... wants to memorize you!!!!! corny yes but dear god he has to have you down to memory! he knows he's never letting you go but it's inevitable for him to want to drink up your expressions, pores, spots and individual hairs. likes to watch you in your natural habitats. has always said that your concentration face is the cutest thing he's ever seen. all of these things come in especially handy when he can't sleep. he's drawn you a million times. he has sketchbooks soley dedicated to you and your face pfttt. when you catch him staring he just smiles really brightly! so cute.... does a cute little "hiiii" too AHHHHH

jeno... what a shy manly man omg... would get a kick out of watching you be cute and cooking or stuff. very domestic! likes looking at you because he really think you're the prettiest most gorgeous and lovely person on earth, effortlessly! is honestly just staring in awe. traces your nose bridge whenever you lay on chest. mutters "wow..." a thousand times under his breath. will end up missing big scenes in movies because of this HAHA, you think it's endearing but you're also like!!! jen please watch katniss literally destroy president snow lol i promise it's more interesting (he disagrees)

haechan... oh boy. he is so annoying about it oh my god lmfaooo. just does it to fluster you and sometimes he just can't help but look at you though. likes to pinch your arm to get your attention in order for you to look back at him HAHA, especially when he's doing it because he wants to give you a compliment, "well hello there pretty, come here often?" likes kissing your cheek (and neck) after they get dusted pink. pokes your cheeks when he staring too, just a big cheek guy imo!! peppers you in smooches, gets flustered when you catch him sometimes... especially if he's looking at you from across the room. sends you a smile

jaemin... oh my god he just loves your face its actually so sickening! like ugh!!! he loves watching your mouth move, v enticing lol. his hands subconsciously find their way to to your lower lip. his hands always land on your thighs as well lol. looooves to stare at you in the morning or when you're sleepy because your puffed out face is the best thing to him. whenever you catch him, he is so confident, especially when you question him about it, he's like "why can't i stare at my gorgeous partner... freak.... you can't just look like that and expect me not to be obsessed with you" so sassy... but is actually so genuine sometimes it almost makes you cry

chenle... GGAAAHHHHHH so cocky!!! but it hits different because he will stare you down so hard and will lean in super close and run his eyes all over your features but when you look his face breaks out into the cutest little whisker smile in the world, just for funzies, mumbles out an exasperated "...cute......" mostly does it to fuck with you but it's a win win for him tbh, but won't admit it. is always staring at you because he can, but also because he always wants to make sure you're safe esp in public. has mastered understanding your facial expressions and tics.

jisung... "nothin... you just looked cute." simp nation. is actually more confident than he lets on. you realize this when he leans down to cover what you're looking at after he's been staring and not realizing it. yknow what i mean? like he's so tall so if he's watching you make breakfast or something and he's been staring for a while, he would bend down to have his face within your line of vision. what a cutie lol. you always pull his cheek when you catch him staring and he has to pretend he doesn't like it all while he's smiling and giggling AHA. likes to stare at you because he has to remind himself that you're real and that he has you all to himself <3

oh ma goshh hiiiiii haha ummm im still getting used to writing blurbs and headcanons again so sorry! was watching hunger games while writing this so HAHA, enjoy! i missed you guys!

[liv-is]

Liv’s {Totally Optional Non-Mandatory Completely Voluntary} Pointers for Fleshing Out Character Relationships

Hi I’m liv e. and by middling demand I am going to blab a liiittle* bit about relationships.

So I will start by saying that I’m trained & licensed as a marriage and family therapist. So this is kind of what I do all fucking week. And I like this whole writeblr thing so why not make it fun and about fiction instead. LOL.

The purpose of this liiiiittle** post is to offer some ways in which you, a writer (great job btw!), might deepen your own understanding of the relationships between two or more characters in your writing. More specifically, by thinking a little deeper about how relationships function in real life.

These are ways in which I might conceptualize a relationship between people who seek my services as a clinician.

A small disclaimer: the VAST majority of my work is with couples (because I. prefer to see couples over families, lol), so this advice is coming from that perspective. Please keep in mind also that there are certainly infinite other ways to think about relationships. This is just the way I was trained. Or at least, the parts of my training that resonated with me the most, especially as I began writing more seriously.

My hope is that reading and practicing/toying around with these tips will help add another dimension to how relationships play out in your writing. So um. Cheers! Let’s chat.

*it’s not a little. it’s a lot.

**it’s a long post.

i. What I Say vs. What I Mean

When was the last time your partner or good friend pissed you off?

Maybe they were flippant about your feelings. Maybe they blew you off to hang out with someone else. Maybe they keep loading the dishwasher like a neanderthal.

And did you say to them, “Baby/honey/sweetums/bestie, it really upsets me when you load the dishwasher like that. I’ve asked you to do it X way several times, and it feels like you’re not listening to me, or that you don’t care about how I feel” ?

Probably not? Because, hello? (If you did, first try, then, wow! you’re a better person than i’ll ever be.)

You might’ve said “Dude, stop cramming shit in the dishwasher like it’s a fucking suitcase,” or “Haha, wow, again with the dishwasher. Awesome. No, it’s like, whatever.“ Or you might not’ve said anything at all, on purpose.

There is a tension that exists, there, in the CONTRAST between what we are thinking/feeling/meaning (e.g., I love you/I miss you/You hurt me) and what we are communicating via our words and actions (e.g., You never make time for me/You’re so lazy/You’re such a(n) [expletive of choice]).

That tension is ... really fucking interesting to read, huh!

Personally, I have a lot of fun watching the needs/wants/feelings of a character (that we might be privy to, as readers) get filtered through their unique... voice.

So say you write a character who is quite rough around the edges, and not very skilled in affection. They have a deep yearning to be close to [love interest], but they just aren’t accustomed to languaging their true feelings. Maybe we see how scared they are of putting their feelings out there. It’s vulnerable. It’s terrifying.

So instead of “I really care about you, [love interest]”, maybe it comes out something more like “Don’t you have anything better to do with your time than follow me around all fucking day?”

And we, the readers, are like, wow! That’s not what you were thinking at all man! You’re so bad at this, that’s awesome.

So the point of all this is that it’s very helpful to clarify for yourself, in any meaningful interaction between characters in or soon-to-be-in a relationship:

What are the characters individually thinking during this interaction? What are the emotions that are present? How does it show in their body or their movements? Are they careful not to let these things show, or do they not notice at all?

How are they expecting this interaction to go? (Are they afraid something might go wrong? Are they looking for a certain reaction from each other?)

What DON’T they know about what the other person is thinking? What are their assumptions about how the other person perceives them--in general, and in this moment?

What is the GAP or the CONTRAST between all of the above and what actually ends up coming out of their mouth? Or what actions they end up physically taking (or not taking)?

Are the characters aware of their own contrast, here? How do they feel about it? Or, do they think they are being perfectly congruent?

In this way, you have the ability, as a writer, to create some devastatingly (or delightfully) poignant moments between characters. These are the moments that can really sell the reader on the relationship--its importance (why are you showing us this?) and its appeal (thank you for showing us this, this blew our tits off, etc).

ii. Tender Spots and How to Attack Them for Fun and Profit

So we’ve got issues.

What are the things that really fuckin get at you? Those topics that, when brought up, make you really upset and really defensive at like, mach speed. Maybe you’re insecure about your skills. Maybe it really bothers you when people see you as weak/unintelligent/a burden/unattractive. Maybe you have a rough and complicated relationship with a family member.

So these can be thought of as, like, tender spots (lol). You can also think of them as “raw” spots, sensitive spots, or triggers.

Figure out what your characters’ are!

This is another key way in which you can create deep and believable interpersonal drama--Character A (accidentally or intentionally) stomps all over Character B’s sensitive spots. So to speak.

A very cursory and relatively uncomplicated example of this in action:

Tasha and Mimi are two adults in a committed partnership.

Mimi’s got a real fucking chip on her shoulder about being seen as a burden--her father always went to great lengths to make sure she knew just how much he did for her, just how many opportunities he passed up in order to raise her, just how great his life would have been if she’d never been born.

Tasha is the oldest of five siblings. She was frequently tasked with their care, growing up. She did her best not to complain, as her parents were always very busy working to keep a roof over their head. So, Tasha did her part. She would’ve loved to rest and play and goof off like other kids and teens, sure, but it never felt possible with all of her responsibilities.

Mimi is suddenly injured and is unable to do certain things on her own that she had been doing before. Tasha goes about taking care of these things as well as taking on certain other tasks on her own that the pair of them may have tackled as a team before. Tasha feels stretched very thin by the workload, but is deeply concerned about how Mimi feels. There’s nothing to be done about the situation, she reasons, so there’s no point in complaining about how stressed out she is.

Mimi offers to help to the best of her ability, but Tasha is very concerned about her, and insists that Mimi rest and not exert herself. Mimi insists back. Tasha insists back back.

Mimi points out how stressed Tasha must be. Tasha agrees that she is stressed, but does not elaborate on her feelings. Mimi assumes that Tasha must think that she is a burden.

Mimi then becomes very emotionally activated--she is reminded, consciously or unconsciously, of how shitty it felt to have her father tell her over and over again what a burden she is, and how better off he would be without her. So this must be how Tasha really feels about her, Mimi accuses.

Tasha, who is very stressed but who cares very deeply for Mimi and her well-being, and who does not see Mimi as just a burden, becomes very activated in turn--she feels maligned and misunderstood. And now she certainly can’t talk about how stressed out she is, because it will only convince Mimi that she is right.

So Tasha is now convinced that she must continue to hold her feelings in in order to keep the peace--she’s reminded of her childhood spent taking care of others, and how she never felt allowed to express herself.

This example is obviously from a very zoomed-out view, chronologically, and is not exactly the way we would see it written in fiction (fiction is much more moment-by-moment and, well, exciting, usually). BUT we can see where Tasha and Mimi’s sensitivities lie, and how they specifically hurt each other with their behavior (unintentionally, in this case) by stomping RIGHT ON those sensitivities.

Readers love drama. And drama makes the plot go ‘round! So don’t be afraid to lay it on them!

In your (very good and compelling) writing, ESPECIALLY if you want to write engaging relational conflict, you would do well to clarify what your characters’ deepest sensitivities are. Consider the following:

What needs went unmet for them, growing up? A very cliche therapist-y question, but for good reason--our upbringing is where many of our deepest insecurities originate.

Additionally/alternatively, what do your characters understand to be their role in relation to other people? E.g., are they always the caretaker, the burden, the comic relief, the heartbreaker, the lonely hero, the boss? How did they first get this idea of who they’re ‘supposed’ to be towards others, and how was this reinforced throughout their life? Are they satisfied or dissatisfied with their ‘lot in life’? What do they hate about their ‘role’, if anything?

What sorts of situations might remind them of what they hate most about this role? E.g. ‘I enjoy taking care of others, and I’m good at it, but my partner gets upset if I discuss how stressed I get sometimes--I’m never allowed to express myself.’ How can you incorporate these situations into your story to create conflict?

How does your character respond when these sensitivities are triggered? Do they lash out? Do they retreat and get quiet? Do they ghost people altogether?

What do they think will happen if they are unwilling or unable to fulfill this role in their relationships with others? E.g., ‘My partner will leave me if I am not a good caretaker’, ‘Nothing will get done right if I’m not the one taking charge’, ‘If I don’t keep others at arms’ length, even if they say they love me, I’ll end up hurt.’

This is another way in which you can help your relationships really come to life! Anyways. Read on for more cheer and relational joy!

iii. We’re Attracted to What Hurts Us Sometimes, AKA Oops! I Ran into the Knife, Ten Times,

(less of a part 3 and more a part 2.5, but it was simply too long. so,)

So maybe you have a good idea of what your ideal partner/bestie looks like. It’s probably any number of positive traits: kind, considerate, good sense of humor, shapely posterior, ambitious, active, fun-loving, studious, etc.

What probably don’t make the list are things like: emotionally distant like my mother with whom I long to have a reparative experience.

Maybe you’ve witnessed (or been in) a relationship wherein all parties can be described as ‘just so bad for each other’. And maybe this relationship should not have lasted as long as it did (or shouldn’t be lasting as long as it is). And maybe you’re like--’Why are these assholes still together?’ Or, importantly: ‘Why did these assholes get together at all?’ The answer may surprise you! But more likely, it won’t.

Sometimes, we pick people on purpose specifically because they stab us right in the sensitive spot (again. so to speak).

(i should clarify before moving on: I am specifically NOT talking about relational abuse, here. That’s kind of an entirely different subject that is like. the cousin of this subject. In this discussion, I specifically mean relationships in which there is no major power differential--you’re just bad for each other. These relationships can be what we might call ‘toxic’, sure, and painful, but not abusive. The distinction is important, moving forward. ok ty)

[Author’s Note: I need everyone to know that I wrote and subsequently deleted 700 words here because I realized they didn’t make any fucking sense ok. let’s try this one more time.]

Essentially, it’s a known phenomenon among humans that, when we have experience with relational distress in the past (e.g. a partner who neglected you emotionally, or parents who disregarded boundaries you tried to set), we like to seek out similar people with whom to form relationships. Weird! But not really.

The human brain seeks closure and resolution--where we couldn’t get things to work out with our parents, or our exes, we try to get the same situations to work out next time, with someone new.

Let’s look at another example, together. Take my hand,

Suppose you write a character (Character A) whose mother was in and out of their life from a young age, and never seemed to prioritize them. Now suppose you are looking to craft a fraught or tragic or dramatic romance (or other relationship) with this character. Using what you’ve written of your first character’s backstory, you can do just that!

It’s perfectly believable, you know now, for your Character A to pursue a love interest (Character B) who has a tendency to... not want to stick around. Maybe this love interest seems to fear commitment and intimacy.

Now, maybe Character B in actuality has a very dangerous profession that requires that they maintain the utmost discretion, and be ready to flee anywhere at a moment’s notice. Maybe the fate of the city/kingdom/nation/world relies on B’s profession.

It probably doesn’t make them leaving all the time hurt A any less, though.

Character A, unconsciously or not, is determined to make things work this time around. As the relationship deepens, B is faced again and again with the choice--stay, for your love, or go, as duty commands. Maybe they’ve taken a vow for their profession that is no light thing. They leave, time and time again.

Character A, unconsciously or not, remembers this feeling--it’s an old one. Mother, time and time again, chose something else over them. It would be understandable for A to feel a deep anger towards Mom and B both. Maybe A takes drastic action to get back at B (action that is also, symbolically, retaliatory towards Mom)--maybe they cheat on B, or do something that endangers their own safety.

When all they really want is just to get B to stay.

It’s probably very clear now why it’s not so simple a thing for A to choose to date someone more consistent--this is something that goes beyond B alone.

In this way, you can very easily weave themes into the relationship(s) of your main characters. Maybe the story of A explores the pain of abandonment, or loneliness. If B is the protagonist, maybe the story explores the way we excuse our shitty behavior in relationships (maybe the job is a pretext--maybe they really are scared of commitment), or maybe it’s about the dilemma of duty over love.

Relationships don’t always make sense. Or rather, they do make sense, just in a different way than we might expect. You can use this understanding now to intentionally explore a number of complex relationship dynamics, and to create nuanced (but sympathetic) characters. As you do, consider:

In your existing characters’ relationships--what keeps these assholes together? Why do they have to be with each other, as opposed to anyone else? This is important, again, for selling the reader on the relationship, especially if it’s your work’s main relationship.

What initially attracted your characters to each other? Consider again from the previous section (what is this, a fucking textbook?) the historically unmet needs of your character(s).

How do your characters go about expressing their needs? Think again about CONTRAST here--what is the discrepancy between what the actual need is, and how the character seeks to fulfill it? E.g. ‘I need to keep B from leaving me, because it really hurts me when they go, so I’ll go risk my life just to keep their attention (rather than express this pain to them).’

What similarities, if any, exist between your MC’s relationships with the people in their present lives, and your MC’s childhood relationship(s) with their caregiver(s)? Could you expand on/deepen any similarities in your writing? What themes might emerge if you did?

iv. Change / The Arc

So you’ve got your work’s central relationship. It’s believable, it’s just the right amount of dramatic, it’s suitably tragic, and just all-around devastating. People will cry. Great job!

Now what?

Well, that depends--what ending do you envision for your relationship?

If they remain together, do they get the happily ever after? The happy-for-now? Is the reader left to wonder about whether or not their relationship will survive?

Do they not make it at all? Are they separated by tragedy? Do they crash and burn? Or maybe they try their best, but despite how badly they love each other, it’s just not enough?

Whatever the Point B of the relationship is, if it’s central to the work, you’re gonna want to have a clear arc in there. Or not, idk, I’m not your mom.

You might already know, if you inhale every piece of writing advice you come across (like me), what makes a compelling character arc. The good news is that it’s much the same with relationships! Kind of.

Systems (relationships) tend towards homeostasis. Without deliberate intervention, relationships want to remain the way they’ve always been. Just like people!

And just like characters, relationships need a reason to change. Like a catalyst, or a motivation. Whatever the hell you wanna call it.

It’s not always, like, complicated to figure out the driving force behind change in your central relationships. Sometimes the pieces fall together!

Pay attention to the characters within the relationship--as your characters progress through their arcs, their relationship will naturally shift. It will probably not look exactly the same as it did when it began--there might be similarities, of course (they’re not entirely different people.. usually. And there’s a beauty to bookending a story with the familiar, certainly). But in this case, the relationship can be thought of as an extra character, almost. It’s unsatisfying to read a whole story wherein a central character stays exactly the same. It’s further strange and incongruent for a relationship to stay exactly the same while the characters have like, achieved actualization or whatever.

Outside events can force change on a relationship, just as they do individual characters. A couple that’s close to Characters A and B get married--and A & B start to wonder what their future together even looks like. B’s company hires a fiiiine honey, who’s exactly B’s type, and A starts steaming about it. A pandemic ravages the nation, and to prevent the spread of the virus, A and B have to stay inside togeth

YOU GET IT ok anyways I’m fucking tired of writing. If you’re wanting to develop the arc of your MCs’ relationship(s), think on some of this:

Do your characters see any problem(s) present in their relationship? Are they all equally aware of the problem(s)? Do they agree on what the problem(s) are?

How secure are your characters in their relationship? If anything could possibly cause doubt and conflict to arise, what is it?

Where do your characters see their relationship going in the near future? In the far future? Do their visions align? If not, how do they differ? Do they even want the same thing?

Is the arc of the central relationship congruent with the arcs of the characters who comprise it? I.e. does the relationship remain exactly the same as it was when it started, despite the characters undergoing wild metamorphoses? Is the reverse true?

When you think about their relationship, INDEPENDENT of any ending you may already have decided, where do you see it going? Like, where do these people feel like they’re headed, realistically? Does this align with the ending you’ve decided on for them? If not, this doesn’t mean you’ve written a bad relationship or anything, it’s just a possible sign that some really intense shit might have to happen in order to shift their course, y’know? Or not--the world is your oyster and you are the God of your own creation!

What are you trying to say with your story, and do the arcs of the central relationships reflect that message?

final thots

If you read all that shit, thank you. I wrote it all in one sitting and posted it without proofreading 💜

In all seriousness, I want to emphasize that, although some of these aspects of relationships are most visible in rels with a lot of anguish and maybe even some toxicity, you by no means have to write this kind of relationship in order to make use of these tips. You could write a very Normal couple!

The idea is to offer you some avenues through which to consider aspects of your characters’ psychology and personalities, and how they mesh or clash with their partners’ or besties’.

Anyways I hope this was helpful. I love talking about relationships I could literally go on and on all day. Which I kind of just did so. lol.

I’ve been liv and I’ve got two main WIPs I’m working on right now: The Romance of the Demigods and The Marking Blood and they’re full of really really super normal relationships and examples of me definitely taking my own fucking advice.

Cheers and happy writing! 💖💖💖