#Which she did because my asshole job wouldn't give me time off to do that

[rahabs]

Is it ridiculous to be devastated that my dog (who is and always has been extremely anxious) loves my sister more than me? Wags her tail, gets excited to see her, etc, whereas it seems she can hardly stand me.

[facefullofsadness]

psychopathic but it's okay

band!au (lsfm girlies but in a band and y/n is the 6th member)

guitarist!yunjin x bassist!y/n

prompt - you and yunjin are always arguing and after one argument, the latter has had it with you

content - smut (choking, degradation, overstimulation, slapping, handcuffs, cunnilingus, fingering, tribbing, multiple orgasms, jen kinda forces you into it), angst (harsh language, toxic, arguments, yelling), fluff if you squint hard

wc - 4405

author's note at the end :)

how many times just in this week have we argued already? I can't remember.

to say yunjin and I were toxic would be an understatement. it could be something wildly insignificant, but it wouldn't matter, we would be at each other's throats.

like last week when she told me to get the receipt for the takeout I ordered with kazuha and I forgot it. more like zuha did, but obviously, it was my fault because yunjin said it was.

and throughout this entire week we had been shouting at each other. any small inconvenience or misunderstanding, you name it, we argued about it. misplacing a hairbrush, accidentally eating someone's share, taking the wrong person's keys, showing up late to a meeting or practice. it was exhausting.

I can't even recall the last peaceful moment I had with this girl. it's been months of this dreadful and perpetual conflict that seemed to emerge out of nowhere, but it made me resent her in a way that I hated her guts.

I absolutely despise the way she thinks, her cocky attitude, her nonchalant responses, her dismissive demeanor, she drives me fucking insane.

which leads me to this moment, yelling at each other because she's playing ahead of the band.

"jen, play slower. you're fucking 2 seconds ahead of everyone else," I grumble, frustrated.

"oh whatever y/n, you try playing this shit. all you do is play the same bass line for 3 minutes straight," yunjin rolls her eyes back at me.

I close my eyes and bite my tongue, not wanting it to escalate, especially with the members around, "just play slower."

somehow, we moved on and all continued to practice. but this asshole never fixed her timing issue.

"yunjin, play slower!" I interrupt our practice again to yell at the girl.

she snaps her head at me, "fuck you y/n! I'm literally trying."

"but you're not though? because how are you still fucking off beat when we've been practicing this shit for weeks?!"

"oh my god, give me a break. you're so stuck up, sorry if I don't practice till the break of dawn everyday like you do. unlike you, I actually have a life, I don't have time to be a bratty perfectionist like you."

out of the corner of my eye, I see our youngest eunchae start to wanna speak up, but our leader chaewon stopping her from trying. with that, all the girls leave the room quietly as my blood boils at the words the raven-haired girl is throwing at me.

"I'm fucking stuck up? imagine having a career, THE dream job, and not even trying. you act like I don't have a goddamn life either jen, it's not my fault that I'm not lazy like you are."

the taller girl slings the guitar off her shoulder and aggressively puts it down before stomping up to me.

"I don't wanna hear your bossy mouth utter another word about my work ethic bitch. you're only so fussy about this because you don't have anything else in your life to look forward to."

"your sorry excuses are no use anymore yunjin. stop acting like you're the best when you're no better than an amateur, you're literally only here because there was no one else."

"did you want that to sting? sorry princess but that only works if it's the truth, we both know you all need me here. without me, you're nothing."

I clutch the strap of my bass and swing it off my body, immediately grabbing the collar of yunjin's shirt and pushing her back into the keyboard piano, making the stand shake.

"listen to me and listen fucking well. I can make you leave the band and you can act like it doesn't matter to you but I know you'll be devastated. I know you're just a scared little girl, too intimidated by the outside world to actually quit. you may not be scared of me which is why you don't try, but I'm exhausted of you trying to have power over me when you're just a weak sorry bitch who your parents are ashamed to care for anymore."

I struck it where it hurts because not only did I not care about if she would loathe me for my words, but I wanted it to.

suddenly, I'm being manhandled until my back falls against the couch in our practice room, yunjin's weight pressing me down. my hands struggle to push her off and break free, but her stronger grip grabs both of my wrists and pins them above my head against the arm rest of the sofa.

"fuck off of me jen!" I yell at her, body wriggling under her own.

her free hand suddenly takes hold of my neck and squeezes, forcing my throat to let out a struggled squeak and breath.

"shut the fuck up whore! I'm so tired of your yapping!" the girl above me growls and tightens her hold on both my wrists and neck.

I look up at her with fear growing in my eyes, and I can see the pure rage on her face. I'm incapable of moving my arms and hands free of her iron grip, and it steadily gets harder to breathe as I feel her nails, though short, dig into my skin.

"you're insufferable. you think I'm a weak sorry bitch with no power over you, huh? let me remind you otherwise since you're too braindead to remember how strong I am."

yunjin's gaze is wild. the fire in her eyes has no sign of calming and the clench in her jaw as she lowers her face towards mine doesn't release any tension. but as she nears herself and comes unfathomably close, there's no denying the lust that clouds her dilated pupils.

as my breathing becomes impossible and I get lightheaded, my senses increase and I can hear my own heart pounding in my ears. I can also hear her shaky breath and feel it reach my face. her knee in between my thighs presses against my core and I release a choked whimper.

"I'm gonna treat you like my own sex toy and you're gonna want me to fuck your brains out after I lay waste to your body. you are gonna be my fuck doll and you're gonna love every second of it, you hear me? dirty little slut."

I'm simultaneously terrified of the intensity and escalation of the situation, but I'm also unbelievably horny at this point. the ache in between my legs grows hot and I feel it start to throb with the way her knee digs deeper into my core.

"I can't..." I manage to choke out, pleading with the darting of my eyes focusing on her face and between her intense glare.

yunjin eventually releases tension on my throat, and I can breathe again, oxygen slowly enabling itself to run through my lungs again. the lustful stare never wavers, however, and both of our gazes are fixed on each other's eyes.

"I don't care if you can't take it, I'm gonna make you."

with that, she moves her hand, once choking my neck, and grasps around it, fingers clutching my nape, her head diving in to begin leaving sloppy kisses trailing my jaw downwards. the pressure on my airways is gone, but my breath still stops in my throat as her mouth kisses, sucks, and bites harshly at my neck.

"w-wait... don't do t-that..." I stutter, telling her to slow down or stop.

"shut the fuck up." she growls aggressively against my ear, "I'm gonna have you however I want."

there's no room for protest as I feel the hand on my neck trail down my collarbone and between my breasts, her finger circling around my right boob and going inwards, finally pinching the nipple at the middle.

"nghh.." the noise in my throat releases on its own.

"my little slut, so easy to use. why else wouldn't you wear a bra under such a mesh shirt? you wanted this so bad, didn't you?"

the treatment of my boobs and nipples harshens as she's suddenly slapping her hand against them, watching as they jiggle under my thin shirt. I yelp out in pain, still feeling my core rush with wetness.

"you're wearing too much," yunjin scoffs.

her hand pops open all the buttons of my shirt and fingers return to harassing my hard buds. my body struggles under her again as her tongue drags along my neck and across my collarbone, the sharp bites of her teeth occasionally making me tug at the harsh grip at my wrists again.

the noises of her mouth on my skin are so wet, I can even hear her heavy breathing and small moans escape, intensifying the pleasure building in my lower stomach. I can't help but release a deep groan at one of my abused nipples being enveloped by her needy mouth.

"f-fuck.. no, s-stop- ahhhh..." I try to get out.

my words are drowned out by the sounds of my whimpers growing louder and the slurping of my tit in her mouth. my eyes struggle to keep open, watching her tongue flick around my bud, yunjin switching to my other boob, repeating everything all the same.

"can you stop moving? god, I'm doing something here and your flailing is infuriating." she let's out a frustrated huff before detaching completely from my body, reaching for something underneath the couch.

my hands are free for a second before I feel cold steel capture my wrists, cuffing them together and securing them on a pipe against the wall.

"so much better." she states satisfied before bringing both her hands to slap both of the sides of my boobs.

I let out an unstable shout at the stinging pain that followed, and it only continued as she grasped at my chest with both hands and kneads at them needily.

"jen... please, ahhh.." I whimper out.

"huh? what was that y/n? you need to speak up for me." she continues her abuse on my tits as my eyes water.

"it hurts..." I manage.

"oh is that so? too bad I don't really care. after all, if I were weak, it wouldn't hurt so much right?" yunjin says in a mocking tone.

her hands become aggressive, dragging themselves down my body and grasping hard at my waist, squeezing my thighs, before landing a harsh slap on my ass, one side, then the next.

"yunjin ah! please! fuck, it hurts..."

"a powerless little girl like me shouldn't be able to harm you, right y/n-ie?"

fuck you huh yunjin.

my eyes are still squeezed shut as I feel her start to unbuckle my pants and zip them down, taking my jeans off of me. my core is absolutely throbbing with desire, panties soaked.

she places a finger at the hem of my underwear, dragging the digit down, trailing my mound, to my aching clit, through my leaking entrance, then pinching the material and letting it snap back into place, warranting a shiver down my spine at the feeling.

"I should've known a whore like you would be drenched after all that. you kick and whine about how much it hurts but look at how much you fucking love it."

it's hard to argue with her when the anticipation to feel her relieve my desire grows stronger the more she messes with me.

"don't worry darling, I'll ruin you perfectly."

I feel my panties get pushed to the side before a hot and wet muscle is felt at the base of my entrance trailing up slowly, until there's a hard suck at my bundle of nerves.

"fuckkkkk ahhhh!!!" I let out an involuntary scream at the feeling.

god it feels so good, my eyes squeezed shut as her onslaught of eating me out continues, hard and fast. she bends my knees and forces my legs apart, holding my thighs so she has free reign of my pussy.

"mmm, it's in the way," I hear her mumble before a loud tear is heard, assumedly from my panties.

I could care less when she sucks hard with her mouth over both my clit and hole, tongue darting between circling my bundle of nerves and digging into my pussy. I tug hard at my restraints, wanting so badly to grasp her luscious dark hair and push her into me.

my hips move on their own, trying to grind against her mouth, but they fail when yunjin's hands push my thighs apart again and she wraps her arms around them, hands on my waist. I force my eyes open and look down at her, what a sight.

her eyes are closed, and she looks peaceful. so unlike the rapid and desperate licking, sucking, and moaning coming out of her sinful mouth. the grip on my waist is firm but so gentle, her thumbs rubbing softly against my skin. she only takes a hand off of my waist to run fingers through her hair, pushing it back to have all the room she needs to indulge in my waterfall. yunjin definitely craved this more than me.

moans continued to slip out of my mouth, fueling her on.

"you're so delicious, this pussy is mine," I feel her mumble against my lips though still audible.

"fuck me jen, more more more, ahhh, yes, keep going just like that, oh my god!!!"

I was about to shut my eyes again until she looked up at me. through half lidded eyes, it almost looked like they were completely black, pupils so blown it was hard to tell if she was human. the desire was so fiery in her eyes and looking up at me only drew her in further, digging her face into my pussy.

her tongue dug impossibly deep into my hole, flicking wildly inside of me, making me arch my back in immense pleasure. her nose rubbing against my hot clit contributed to the build up of my impending climax.

the hold on my waist tightened, securing my hips down to the sofa, her eyes closed again as I shut my own as well, the noises coming from a mixture of my leaking pussy and her lewd slurping were indescribably orgasmic, the desperate moaning slipping from both of our mouths were borderline embarrassing if it weren't for our soundproof walls covering the sounds of sin.

"jennifer oh my god fuck fuck please, shit. b-baby... I'm, I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna cum sosososo hard..." I rambled.

I heard as I continued to incoherently mumble anything that came to mind as I felt her grip on my waist start to hurt, nails digging into my skin, making my lower half impossible to move.

"give me your cum now, let me drink you," yunjin says with the sexiest most raspy voice I've heard from her.

a low moan from deep in her throat against my pussy vibrates against my clit, her tongue thrusting into my hole repeatedly at insane speeds. it was so overwhelming and more than enough to launch me over the edge.

my vision disappeared, my body shook viscerally, my mouth fell open and loud screaming came out of it as I orgasmed with so much pleasure. I felt my pussy gush cum into yunjin's expectant mouth, her tongue continuing to flail in me. I struggle hard against the restraints still, feeling my wrists sting with every tug. I can't think straight, my body shaking with every wave of pleasure that runs through me.

I fall limp, my head shaking left to right and mumbles coming out of my mouth. yunjin calms her pace and gives kitten licks up and down my slit, lapping up any other juices I released that she missed. her grip on my waist loosens, and they caress my sides carefully. she makes her way up to meet my face, planting abnormally soft kisses in her wake, her hands softly caressing my red skin. all the slap markings, all the bites, all the hickies, all the nail marks, spots red, spots bloody, her touch eases the pain.

"y/n..." she whispers against my ear, making me shiver.

I can't even open my eyes as the exhaustion hits me hard. I hear her mess with the pipe and cuffs around my wrists before I feel my hands fall against the arm rest again, freeing my arms finally. yunjin picks both of them up and places gentle pecks all around both wrists, slowly spreading her comfort across my entire body.

"jen..." a croak somehow comes out of my mouth.

"baby..." her voice, gentle...

"are you okay angel?" she whispers loud enough for me to hear.

my heart stops beating but resumes at the speed of sound after a moment.

I can't respond, and so she comes closer to my face and cups my cheek with a careful hand, intently observing my expression and condition. I feel her thumb softly caress my bottom lip and her stare fall onto my slightly open mouth.

"I.. I'm..." I can't form another word as the exhaustion catches up and my eyes fall shut.

every other sense of mine is alert, I'm still fully conscious, but my eyes refuse to open, they simply can't. I feel yunjin come closer to me then suddenly small kisses tracing my jaw, lips against my ear.

"you can rest y/n-ie, I'll do the rest."

wait, what?

her hand that was once on my face trails down my body, tracing over all the marks again, before her slender fingers slip between my folds, causing my entire body to jolt.

"jen?!" I shriek out, my hands flying to grip her arms.

"shhh, just relax. I told you already, you're just my little sex toy, I need to get my usage out of you."

fuck, I should've known she was feigning generosity.

I had no time to respond as after gathering enough of my cum from my last orgasm, yunjin swiftly slips two fingers into my tired cunt.

"FUCK!" I scream out.

my body reacts on its own, shaking against her warm body leaning against me.

"you've got another one in you, don't you?"

her pace picks up quickly, my pussy burning at the speed. suddenly, her thumb rubs harshly against my overstimulated clit, causing me to cry out.

"t-too much! please!" I sob into her shoulder.

yunjin's body hovers over mine, holding me close. one of my hands gripping her arm pumping in and out of me, the other clutching the back of her shirt, my face wet with tears flowing in her shoulder, melting into her neck.

"you should've thought about that before you talked shit huh?"

"I- I can't!"

"I already told you I don't fucking care y/n, how many times do I have to say it?"

I feel my own tears stain the taller girl's shirt as her fingers ram into my abused hole over and over again, pulling out all the way just to slam back into me again. I scream intensely when a third finger is added, immediately hitting that euphoric spot inside.

"fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck," I chant between every pump of her swift fingers.

"you truly make the perfect little cum slut don't you?"

"jen, ah, ah, ah, please, fuck..."

"what is it baby? feel it coming again?"

I moan out an incomprehensible 'yes' in response, to which I feel yunjin smile against my forehead, planting a sweet peck.

"beg me angel, beg me to keep fucking you until you cum."

my eyes roll back into my head, tears still spilling out and hands gripping for dear life. even if I wanted to beg, I don't think I'm physically capable.

her fingers still inside of me, stopping her movement on my pussy entirely, even on my clit. I whine loudly in response, legs shaking and grip tightening on her.

"no no please yunjin, I- I need you, I need you to keep fucking me. I need to finish, I need your fingers, I'm so close jinny, please please, god please let me cum. I can't, I can't take it, it hurts, it hurts so bad, jen oh god please, don't fucking stop. I need you to keep going, please don't stop now, please please jen-"

my rambling is interrupted by her fingers pounding into my cunt once again, with impossible speed, making my throat strain with another uncontrollable scream of pleasure.

"let it go, give it to me y/n. I want to feel it gush around me again, I need to feel your body fall apart."

and just as quickly as it started, it ended. an explosion of euphoria ripples through me again, I feel goosebumps form on my skin as I moan deafeningly, my fingers sinking into yunjin's body and holding on for dear life. her fingers continue to get sucked into me, clenching hard onto her long digits as she rubs my clit still.

"yes, that's my girl, give it all to me."

my body is shaking, with every subtle touch yunjin does to me, it reacts. my mouth stays open as I can feel the saliva drool out, my eyes barely open but it's no use, it's not like I can see anything clearly.

"your body is just meant for this y/n, I was right. my perfect little angel, the best fuck doll for me."

her fingers slip out of me and I grunt at the loss of fullness. out of the very small field of view I have, I watch as she sucks the juices off her fingers, closing her eyes and savoring the flavor, licking up each of them one by one.

"you're doing so well, but baby..." she leans in and mumbles against my lips, "give me one more."

there's no room for resistance as she moves to get into position. what a menace huh yunjin is. she already knows I'm fucked out of my mind that I'm physically incapable of doing anything. I've always been really sensitive and she's using that weakness against me ten fold.

I try my best to pay attention to what she's doing, watching as she slides her shorts and panties down her legs, the two articles of clothing absolutely soaked. she gets on top of me again and lifts one of my legs up, wrapping it around her waist, her straddling my pussy with her own, interlocking our legs.

"it's finally my turn. fuckkk..."

she moans out as she starts to grind her pussy against mine. every thrust makes my body jolt with overstimulation, I don't know how to take it anymore.

however, watching huh yunjin roll her hips against me, her hands placing my own on her waist, watching as she throws her head back and sweat drips down her long neck, my pleasure grows again. the woman looks ethereal riding me, using my body to get off, it's unreal how delectable watching her fuck me is.

"f-faster, h-harder, jen..." both of us look surprised when I manage to speak.

a sinister smirk crawls and spreads across the aforementioned woman's face, hands on my thighs tapping in approval, "of course darling, who am I to deny?"

and so she fucks me harder, so much harder. so much fucking faster. I immediately see stars and the squelching lewd noises of our sopping cunts fill my ears, accompanied by the pornographic moans from both of us. I feel the rhythmic pattern of yunjin's hips rolling against me with my hands on her waist.

I pull her forward against me, thrusting my own hips up into her, gaining leverage and screaming out in pleasure as our clits bump repeatedly because of this.

"fuck y/n! you're so good at this, don't... don't you dare give out on me right now, you feel too fucking incredible."

the girl above me has her head down facing my own, eyes screwed shut, face scrunched up looking focused, mouth hanging open. one of my hands feel up her body, trailing up her covered front and grazing her nipples, eliciting a groan to come from her throat. my hand cups her cheek and pulls her closer to my face, making her open her eyes and make eye contact with me.

we stare straight into each others' eyes, observing the expressions on our faces, memorizing the view forever. I hate this girl so much, I hate her with my entire being, but she's beautiful, she's goddess-like, and she's absolutely perfect in my trembling hands, looking into my eyes like I'm the only one in her world.

yunjin leans in to finally kiss me, plump and soft lips roughly clashing against my own. I desperately chase to reciprocate the passion she pushes into my mouth, forcing my tongue into her and ramming it down her throat, making her moan out. her mouth feels like heaven on earth as I melt into her delicious strawberry flavored lips, tongue and her saliva tasting like all the cum she sucked out of my cunt just moments prior.

her thrusts become sloppy and I feel my hole start to clench around nothing as we moan into each others' mouth.

"cum with me love, cum with me, please baby, I need you." her voice shaky and sounding vulnerable.

I open my eyes one last time to look up at her, eyes getting watery too. I take her bottom lip into my mouth and pull away with my teeth, letting it go with a pop.

"I'm cumming love, I'm cumming..." I warn her.

I pull her into me and hug her, embracing her tightly as she painfully grips my thighs, stilling her hips and feeling her warmth leak all over my pussy. I moan along with her, screaming out in blinding pleasure, my heat flooding both of our thighs and running down my legs, onto the couch under.

she collapses on top of me, her entire body weight covering me completely. I snuggle my face into her neck, placing soft kisses around every area I could reach.

"are you okay?" I ask softly into her ear.

I'm met with no response but soft breathing near my ear. I peer over to look at her face and she's out cold.

I giggle softly at the gorgeous woman sprawled out on top of me, legs intertwined, cum running down our legs, her lips bruised and red.

"I think I won this argument jennifer."

a/n - i'm just realizing that this barely had any actual band dynamics or anything and that makes me sad bc i love that shit so much. sob, oh well maybe another time (part???). my first idea for this concept was slow down by chase atlantic but then i switched it bc i feel like i could write a better plot for the lyric i orginally chose so stay tuned mayhaps in the future. anyways, hiiiii first post pls don't bully me tumblr is foreign land to me but writing is not though I haven't written in months 😙 enjoy first fic w my actual gf (like actually fr fr huh yunjin is my gf she proofread this-)

[strangemaleswaps]

Strange Job Swap

“Oh it's beautiful!” exclaimed the customer waiting in line. I handed her a nicely decorated cake for her son's birthday.

“It's no big deal. Just doing my job.” I acted like it was no big deal, but really I was gladly accepting the praise!

“This is perfect though. Have you considered being an artist?” she replied with a slightly more serious look.

“Yes I have actually…but the job market is tough.”

“Aww you'll get there eventually! Don't give up! Well anyway, you made my day so for that, thank you!”

“You're welcome.” I was a bit sad though, because she was right; I SHOULD be an artist. I recently earned my bachelor's degree, but yet I was still stuck in this dumb hick town, working as a grocery store cake decorator. I may have been good at what I do but I wouldn't want to do it forever!

At least my co-workers are pretty decent, especially my fellow bakery buddies, Chase, Amber, and Domingo. Amber was cool and didn't take anyone’s shit, which is why I loved seeing her because I didn't have much confidence when dealing with unruly customers. Domingo was very sweet, and even though he didn't speak very good English, he's hella good at his job. And Chase, well…he's hot! His bleach blond hair somehow always caught the light at a perfect angle. I don't know how I even kept my focus when he's working next to me.

At the end of my shift, I clocked out, and decided to buy a couple groceries like I normally did. I scanned everything at the self-checkout, put the receipt into one of my bags, and started walking towards the exit. The store had 2 exits on either side of the front, but I only took one because the other had a certain asshole at it - Richard.

The greeter position was removed a long time ago, but they bring it back for employees that have been injured or are too old, so that they can keep their jobs. Now this old guy named Richard had surgery a long time ago and became the greeter while he recovered. But yet he never went back to his old position.

He always stays at one specific entrance, and the reason I hated him so much was because he's racist. Part of his job has him checking customers’ receipts to make sure they didn't steal anything, which seems pretty unnecessary when you have those anti-theft machines at the exit. But I've seen him. The only people he checks the receipts for are minorities. It's not a subtle thing either; he’s super friendly, greeting and saying goodbye to all the white people passing but when it comes to someone who's not, his demeanor suddenly changes. 

My luck must've run out today, because I found the sliding glass doors at my usual exit were broken and currently being fixed. The area was blocked off by a barricade, and I knew there was only one other way to leave. I headed over to the other exit, and there Richard was, waving goodbye to a white mother and her toddler. He was wearing his typical gray uniform shirt that was clearly too small, because you could see his gut and nipples trying to poke through. Gross.

I moved through the aisle, trying not to draw attention to myself, but it was all for nothing because right on cue, Richard walked up to me and gave a great big (and so obviously fake) smile.

“Hello sir, can I see your receipt please?”

“Richard, it's me, Marco. I work in the bakery. You've seen me a million times before.” His smile suddenly faded, and his eyes narrowed, as if every ounce of happiness in his body just vanished.

“That's no excuse. How do I know you aren't stealing?”

“Because I want to keep my job?”

“Don't backtalk to me. You seem awfully suspicious today.” He then reached for his walkie talkie and started to page a manager. I really was able to walk out with no repercussions because I truly didn't steal anything, but there's a chance he would page the Asset Protection lady, who was almost as awful.

“Hello? Is anyone there?” Nobody answered him. Thank god.

“Am I free to go now?” I said happily. The anger returned to his face.

“Just don't let me catch you stealing again. Or there'll be consequences!”

“Yeah…suuuure.” I walked out the door, into my car, and back home. I can't believe some people honestly. I was so sick of this town! I needed to move away real soon.

When I got home my dog, Kenny, was excited to greet me as usual so I let him outside to do his business while I got into my running clothes, prepping for a run. As I let Kenny back in, I went to check the mail and found a weird envelope in between the bills and spam. I opened it up and it was a letter addressed “to whom it may concern”. I threw it away without a second thought but Kenny suddenly ran up to the trash can, took it out, and placed it back in front of me.

“You really want me to read this, don't you boy?” I said cheerily as I patted him on the head.

“To whom it may concern,

Are you struggling with your current job? Unhappy with the life you have? Well I have just the cure for that! We are now selling happiness inducing coins for only $1 with free shipping! One flip of this coin will guarantee you will soon get a job you love! Get it fast before it all runs out! Just follow the link on the back of this letter if you are interested.” - VV

I wondered who or what VV was supposed to be, and $1 with free shipping sounds too good to be true, so this seemed like a scam. I also wasn't a superstitious person,  but for some reason my gut was telling me that this was a good idea. Kenny seemed to think so too as he was wagging his tail under the table and I read. I followed the link listed on the back of the page, typing in each random letter and number combination into my phone and ordered the lucky coin. I went to bed that night feeling a little more hopeful.

The next day at work was just like the previous day, only the door was fixed so I didn't have to walk out the exit Richard was standing at. We did make eye contact though, and he shot me a dirty look. I got home to find that the package had already arrived, which was awfully quick. I cut open the box and inside was a golden coin with a picture of a brain on it. The other side had a picture of a person with their arms spread wide. It was a really weird design. I read the instructions.

How to use:

Flip the coin

No matter what side it lands on, you'll be guaranteed happiness in your new job!

It sounded so lame, but I followed the instructions anyway. I flipped the coin the air, and slapped it on the back of my other hand. Tails. Nothing happened. I guess it was just $1 so it wasn't a huge waste of my time. It's pretty cool looking so maybe I could display it on my dresser or something.

I felt especially tired the rest of the night, but I was fine because I had a day off tomorrow. I was gonna go to the park with Kenny, as well as do a few errands. I was just glad I had time away from my job.

The next morning my alarm went off for some reason. I must've accidently set it by mistake. The weirder thing was Kenny wasn't there. Normally at the sound of my alarm, he comes running from wherever he was sleeping, and jumps on the bed to get me up. But there was nothing. When I started to truly wake up and become more alert, I realized that my alarm was set to the default or something. Instead of my usual calming piano, it was an annoying ringing. I opened my eyes to see what was happening. My vision was blurry, but I could tell I wasn't in my own room.

What happened? Did someone kidnap me? The alarm clock wasn't even on a phone, but rather it was an actual alarm clock. I had no idea what was going on, but I reached over to turn it off so I could think. I'm certain I must've been kidnapped somehow but why? And why would they set an alarm clock? I couldn't see but felt around the nightstand for a clue and found a pair of glasses. When I tried them on, just like that, my vision returned to normal. I had perfect vision before! Why did I suddenly need glasses? I reached up to scratch my head and found my hairline was incredibly receded. I was balding! I looked down with my now clear vision to find an even worse fact. I was chubby!

I sat up and stared at the foreign gut and two large man tits, as well as numerous graying chest hairs. I ran my hands through the hair, pinching them to make sure they were real. I pinched the tits as well, and felt sensations I've never felt before as they wobbled when I let go. I ran my hands through my face and felt a mustache and double chin, and began feeling nauseous at the thought of what I actually looked like. I didn't see a mirror in the room so I walked out the door trying to find a bathroom. The fat jiggled all around as I ran.

I got to the bathroom and nearly puked on the spot when I saw who I was. Richard. Oh god no. Of all people, I had to look like this racist bastard? I stared at myself and grazed my hands along my face. Suddenly I felt angry and started pinching it instead, as if I was doing the same thing to the real Richard, but denial didn't help; that was my face and it hurt. I touched his mustache and pinched it, as if it would come off. 

Just then I heard the doorbell ring. I didn't want to interact with anybody looking like this but until I figured out how to fix it, I knew I had to pretend to be Richard. I answered the door to find the mailman.

“Howdy Rich! Woah uh.” He stared at my chest. I forgot I was still shirtless. Having this much fat hanging from my body was almost like answering the door naked. “I see you've lost some weight!” he said, obviously lying.

“Oh uh, thanks.” I replied, trying to imitate Richard’s voice, which was pretty easy considering I've mocked him before.

“Well anyway, not much today; just a letter.” He handed me a letter with a purple stamp on it.

“Well uh see you tomorrow!” The mailman went on his way and I closed the door. I opened the letter and found a note similar to the lucky coin advertisement.

To whom it may concern,

Good morning! I trust that your lucky coin worked well? Welcome to your new life! As promised, you now have a job that you love. Unhappy with the results? Just flip the coin once again, and make sure it lands on what it landed on before! If not, however, your fate is sealed. Best Wishes! - VV, Venefica Viola

Shit. They're not lying though. Richard did love his job. And since I was in his body, I now had that job! But who is this Venefica Viola? It sounded like Latin somehow. I walked back to the bedroom to find Richard’s phone. Luckily he didn't have any lock screen pin so I could easily get in. I searched for a translator, dodging the random pop up ads that were everywhere on his phone and looked up Venefica Viola.

Violet Witch. So magic is involved somehow. I needed to get my coin back so I could undo this! It must still be at my own house. Shit! I just realized why the alarm clock went off. Richard worked today! He had perfect attendance and never uses his PTO, so not going in was gonna look suspicious. I glanced at the clock and realized I only had 20 minutes. 

Even though I'd love to see Richard be humiliated by going to work in his underwear, I decided that it wasn't worth attracting attention so I looked through his clothes to put on a work uniform. I found a pair of boxers and accidently flashed myself when I completely forgot I didn't have my own dick either. It was all wrinkly, but honestly a lot bigger than I thought. No. I was not about to get horny over Richard's dick! I found what he normally wore to work and put the rest on. I found tucking the shirt was more difficult than usual, as I had to pull it over my belly.

I guess I could make this work…for now. I hated to admit it, but Richard wasn't all that bad looking. It was his personality and habits that made him so repulsive, but now that I was in control of him, he didn't look all that bad. Maybe I could even turn things around for now and do something nice for the people I know he hates. I grabbed the car keys on the nearby table, and drove to work.

I walked in the store, put Richard's nametag on, and clocked in. I nearly started walking to the bakery area but stopped myself. I guess I'm really going to have to be a greeter for a day. This feels humiliating. I made my way to the front entrance and just stood there, waiting for customers to enter or exit.

Soon enough customers began arriving and I tried my best to act like Richard, though one customer asked if I was all right because I guess I overdid it. I didn't ask any customers to show their receipts though, because I might as well take advantage of being a greeter. I noticed Domingo at the checkout and when he bagged up his groceries, he approached me first instead of the door. He hastily grabbed his receipt and started showing it to me. I wasn't about to let this happen.

“No no it's ok. You don't have to show me the receipt anymore.”

“No?” He looked shocked.

“Checking receipts is stupid anyway. I don't need to do it anymore.”

“Really? I can go?”

“Yep! Have a good day.” It was unnerving seeing him so scared at the sight of me, but he smiled like normally did as he put the receipt back in the bag and walked out.

As I moved towards the break room to take my break, I noticed someone who looked awfully familiar walk through the door. It was…me! I mean Richard. It must've been; if I was in his body, he must've been in mine. It became more obvious by the way he was walking, taking big steps as if he was used to having his gut swinging around…like mine was now. God I hated this. I had to talk to him to sort things out. He smirked as I approached.

“Hey!”

“Oh it's you. I mean me. I mean,” he paused for a second and rounded his mouth into an even bigger smile, which looked uncanny with my face. “The old me.”

“What do you mean ‘the old you’”?

“Well seeing as I'm much younger now, while you're much older, I think the term is appropriate.”

“Well yeah, but not for long. I'm going to switch us back.”

“Oh no you're not! I may have preferred being white, but I’m enjoying youth again! Oh, and don't worry. I saw that coin thing and that letter this morning, and I made sure it would never see the light of day again. You got that…Richard?” 

He called me that in the same mocking tone that I always use to call him. I can't believe this!

“Y-you can't do this! I had a future!”

“That's my future now old man. You know maybe I could be a model with these looks. Maybe make one of those, what do you kids call it? OnlyFans?”

God no, I'm an artist, not a pornstar. He can't do this!

“The greeter is a real fun job, Richard. Enjoy it. You're hired!”

[bteezxyewriter12]

Back to Me

Pairing- Seonghwa x Named Reader

Word count- 5k

Includes- Angst, Fluff

Based on the song Back to Me by the Rose

Tag List- @mingtina @jaxminnie @yeosayang @delightfulmoonbanana @tannie13 @y00nzin0 @marsstarxhwa

@yeosxxx @seokwoosmole @jjongsbebe @wisejudgedragonhairdo @meowmeowminnie @woo-stars @borntowalkaway @usagionthered @san-realblkwife @seonghwasstar @jejeyeppeo @soulseobi05 @kpop-bambi @prayerofthehaim @realisticnotes @pinkies-things @insomniacatiny @stephy-nicole13 @mknae-jongho @bykeynote

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Seonghwa POV

Sitting on the floor in front of her apartment door, I wait for her to come home

This is the only way I can see her, the only way I know to get her to talk to me

To get her back

Called me all day

But I never pick up

Instead of pulling my weight

Always pushing my luck

Our relationship was volatile near the end

It didn't start out that way

Meeting in high school, high school sweethearts

Falling completely in love

I finally had someone who loved me, who cared, who'd do anything for me

My childhood and teenage years were awful

My parents were complete assholes and abusive

But when I met her.....it's like everything fell into place

Everything was worth living for again

As long as she smiled at me, I was happy

As long as she kissed me, I was loved

As long as she held me, I was safe

As long as she loved me, I was worth it

Then we graduated

She went to college to become a teacher

I didn't go to college and started my string of dead end jobs

But we were still happy

We moved in together and everything was amazing

Until I started drinking

And kept on drinking

And I started treating her like crap

I'm a mean drunk and I fought with her all the time over nothing

Screaming matches, I'd make her cry then I'd leave, disappearing for days

She'd call me all day and I wouldn't pick up the phone

The times I did pick up was to yell at her to leave me alone

I'd flirt with other girls

I never cheated on her, I would never and even when I did flirt it was just to get drinks at the bar because I was always broke

Spending our money on alcohol

Money we needed for rent and bills

Money that she was making for us

You gave me all that I could take

Yeah, I took it all for granted

And through it all, she loved me

Accepted my apologies when I used to give them in the beginning

I'd cry, beg her to forgive me and she always did

After awhile I knew my sorries meant nothing because I kept doing the same things, so I stopped apologizing

Act like nothing happened whenever I came back home or woke up the next day

And she never said a word, never demanded an apology, just told me she loves me over and over

Offer her help which I accepted when I was sober and ignored when I was drunk

I took her for granted

I took her love for granted

I thought she'd always be there

And now she's not

I remember thinking

I don't need you

But then time passed by

And it's so untrue

Now I'm the rain over your parade

Reason you're over me

When we had fights and I was so incensed, I used to think I didn't need her

And when she broke up with me three months ago, I yelled in her face that I don't need her

After the break up I kept thinking, convincing myself, I didn't need her

I was better off without her

I didn't need her nagging

Didn't need her help she offered with my drinking problem

I didn't need her smile, didn't need her holding me

I didn't need her love

I was fine

But in the back of my head I knew it wasn't true

And as time passes I'm not denying that it's untrue anymore

I can't stop thinking about her

I miss her so much it physically hurts

It's killing me to not wake up to her every morning, to not have her in my arms, to not have her to come home too

I'm dying without her

I love her more than anything in this world

But she's over me

And it hurts so fucking much, I can't breathe

The worst part

It's all my fault

Calling all day

Tryna make things right

Since you told me hit the road

I've been running on empty

If anything I know

It's how to ruin a happy ending

Ever since Wooyoung sent me that fucking picture, I've been calling her all day for the last two days

And jokes on me because now she's not picking up the phone

And I'm feeling the way she felt when I wouldn't pick up

Panicky

Upset

Desperate to hear her voice

Worried

I've been falling apart since she threw me out of her apartment but I hid it, pushed it away

I was angry she left me and I blamed everything on her

I held on to the anger for a few weeks until the pain of not being with her was too much and I couldn't hide it anymore

We were on our way to a happy ending until I fucked it up

I just had to start drinking and ruin everything

She always said I was the one she wanted forever, the one she'd marry, have a family with and I wanted that desperately too

But I ruined it all

I remember when you still needed me

Don't know how I let it go so easily

But I always keep making the same mistakes

Maybe I never deserved you anyways

I never deserved her

I knew that from the moment she said yes to me

I was always made to believe I was worthless, a loser, going nowhere in life by my parents and my family

Until her

But I always knew I didn't deserve her

I was always grateful for her love

Happy she loved me, she wanted me

Even after everything started falling apart, she stayed, continued to love me

I didn't deserve that

Not when I fought with her constantly, when I left her alone when she needed me

When I made her cry

I couldn't stand to see her cry, knowing she was crying because of me and I had to leave

I should of stayed there with her, held her, apologized, comforted her

But I ran away

She needed me and I left her

She always said she needed me but she really didn't

I needed her but she didn't need me

She said she needed me to hold her at night, she needed to cuddle me when we watched TV, she needed me with her, near her, she needed my love

I wasn't sure about that then or even now but I do know that the times she did truly need me, when she was crying, when I left her alone for days, I wasn't there

I ignored her

I failed her

I can make you mad

I can make you scream

I can make you cry

I can make you leave

I can make you hate me

For everything

I can make a world out of broken dreams

I can make you say things you don't mean

I can unmake all we were made to be

But I can't make you come back to me

I know whenever we fought it drove her crazy

I'd say stupid shit, making her angry, making her say things I knew she didn't mean

Like I'm a jerk, an asshole, a stupid idiot, a drunk

Made her threaten to leave me

Make her scream at me

She'd never wanted to fight, always tried to diffuse the situation but I kept going, pushing her buttons until she lost it

I made her leave the fight a few times

Making it too much for her to deal with that she just walked away

Lock herself in the bedroom or go stay at her friend's house

I made her cry way too many times

I always said I'd never make her cry when we first got together

But I failed miserably at that

The last fight we had, the one that finally broke her was bad

I was drunk at some bar, flirting with some girl to get her to pay for my drinks

One of my friends called her to come and get me

I remember the hurt on her face when she saw me laughing with the other girl

Smiling, flirting, the girl touching my bicep I was flexing for her

Even though I was drunk, I saw how unhappy she was, how sad and I hated myself

She came over to me and told me she came to bring me home

I fought with her, because of course I did

I told her to go the fuck away, leave me alone

She wouldn't leave, begging me to come home with her

"Please Hwannie. Come home"

She tugged on my arm and I was so out of it, I let her drag me out of the bar

When the cool air hit me once we were out in the street, it woke me up a bit and I realized she was taking me home

Walking me to her car

And I snapped

"Get the fuck off me!", I shouted, pulling my arm out of her grip

"Hwa, stop baby. You need to come home and sleep this off"

"I don't want to go anywhere with you!", I shouted, ashamed of how I was acting and that just pissed me off more

"Seonghwa!"

"You go home. I don't want to fucking go there. I hate being there"

"I'm there baby", she whispered

"I don't give a fuck! I don't want to be around you! All you do is fight with me and it's annoying! You're fucking annoying!"

I remember her starting to cry and it infuriated me

I was angry with myself and took it out on her

I was screaming at her to shut the fuck up in the middle of the sidewalk, to get the fuck away from me, that I wanted her gone

"Seonghwa, I love you-"

"I don't care!", I screamed, "I don't want you! I can't stand you!"

She cried harder, "I...I can't do this anymore Seonghwa. I love you so much but I can't take this anymore. You've been gone for five days and I just want you home with me"

"I don't want to go home! I want to go back inside, I want to drink and flirt with girls who'll buy me what I want!"

She shook her head, "Seonghwa, if you....if you don't come home with me that's it. It's over. You and me....it's over. I love you but I can't drive myself crazy worrying about you, fighting with you. You need help and I want to help you"

"I don't want your help!", I shouted, "I don't fucking need you!"

I remember the tears rolling down her face as she said, "If you don't come home with me right now, then don't come back"

"Fine", I snapped, then turned around and walked right back to the bar, her sobs making me angry at the moment but remembering it now, those sobs break me

I went back to the bar and drank until I blacked out

I woke up on Hongjoong's couch

I found out later that she texted Hongjoong to watch me and bring me to his house

He told me what happened the night before, that her and I were over

I didn't believe him, taking for granted that she wouldn't really leave me

I drank the next night and the next, staying away from the apartment

I only realized everything was real, she really left me, was when I woke up in Hongjoong's apartment three days later and all my stuff was in his living room in boxes

I asked him what the fuck was going on and he reminded me that we broke up

He relayed the fight again, relayed how I made the decision by walking away from her and how she was following through with that decision

He told me she packed all my stuff and asked him to come get it

And I knew in that moment that I took everything too far

I unmade everything we were and everything we were supposed to be

That was the day my world ended, the day I pushed it all away until slowly, bit by bit I'm here now, utterly broken and desperate to talk to her

I could do all the wrong things but I can't make her come back to me

The only thing I can do is try

Which is why I'm here, waiting for her to come home

To convince her to come back to me

--------------------------------

I wait hours until I hear footsteps coming down the hall

She's looking at her phone as she walks towards her apartment

I take the few seconds before she sees me to take her in

Beautiful like always but her whole aura is....sad?

She looks skinnier than the last time I saw her, darker bags under her eyes and she looks exhausted

She looks how I look and feel

Miserable

Her head lifts, her gaze landing on me

Her eyes narrow and harden, a pissed off look forming on her face

"What do you want?", she snaps as I stand up

I know she's mad and I deserve every ounce of her anger

"I...I want to talk to you"

"I have nothing to say. Go away"

She breaks eye contact, moving to the door

I stand aside so she can unlock it

"Please? Just for ten minutes?"

"Seonghwa-"

"Please?", I beg, my voice shaky

I don't know how else to get her back if she won't speak to me

She glares, "You have ten minutes. Then you fucking leave"

I nod, hoping that she'll take me back and I'll never have to leave again

She turns her back to me, walking in her apartment and I follow like a lost puppy

Because truthfully, I'm completely lost without her

"What do you want?", she snaps, throwing her bag and her jacket on the couch, then facing me, her arms crossed over her chest

"I'm sorry", I blurt

"No you're not", she snarls

"Yes I am. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have walked away from you. I shouldn't have fought with you. I should of went home with you that night"

"But you didn't. You wanted to drink and flirt with other girls. You got your wish. You can go and flirt with anyone you want. So why don't you go do that and leave me alone"

"Because I want you", I whisper, ashamed at the things I said to her

I know it hurt her so much

It would hurt me if she said she wanted to flirt with other guys

"No you don't. You walked away from me remember?", she snaps, "Oh wait, you probably don't because you were piss faced drunk"

"I'm sorry", I repeat, desperate for her to see how fucking sorry I really am, "I...I want to come back. I want you"

She snorts, "Now you want me? Now you wanna be here? Where were you when I needed you?"

I don't answer, ashamed

I wasn't with her, where I was supposed to be

"No answer? Well I'll answer for you. You were at the bar getting shit faced. You were flirting with other girls to get drinks. You were gone for days, never answering your phone. When all I wanted was you, you were doing who the fuck knows"

I wasn't here with her but I wasn't doing anything significant when I was gone

Mostly sleeping off my hangover in one of my friend's apartments

Then I'd go out at night again to get drunk again and it would all happen all over again

"I don't even know if you ever cheated on me"

"I didn't", I answer immediately, "I never did"

"How do you know? You were always too far gone to remember what you did"

I shake my head, adamant about this

I know I never cheated on her

I never would

Even when I was drunk, one of the guys was always there

To watch me but really they didn't have to

They told me I never tried anything with any girl, except to flirt to get drinks

And anytime a girl came on to me, I told them no

So even piss faced drunk I didn't cheat on her

"I know. The guys know. They were there. They saw me refuse every girl that came on to me when I was drunk. And I never tried to get with any girl. I only flirted to get my drinks paid for. You can ask them"

They even told me I was the most well behaved drunk they've known, in that aspect anyway

"Whatever", she snaps, "It doesn't change the fact that you would rather get drunk than be home with me"

"That's not true!", I answer, upset she thinks that, "It's just, when I get alcohol in me that's all I wanted but when I was sober all I wanted was to be with you. And that's all I want, is to be with you again. All I want is you"

She just shakes her head, looking away, "Why are you here Seonghwa? It's been three months and I haven't heard from you since the day we broke up. There's more you're not telling me. What happened? Why are you here now? Why not a month ago? Why not a week after we broke up? Why now?"

"Because", I exclaim, my heart hurting just thinking about it, "You went out with someone else! And the thought of another man touching you...I can't handle it"

She stares at me like I've lost my mind

I feel like I lost my mind

"What the hell are you talking about? I haven't gone out with anyone"

Is she really gonna lie to me?

To my face?

"Yes you did Joanne. Wooyoung saw you out with some guy at a diner", I tell her, pulling my phone out and opening it to the picture

The picture Wooyoung took of her and the guy and sent to me, effectively breaking my heart

I can't even look at it without tearing up

Holding it up, I show it to her, a look of anger and disbelief on her face

"Wooyoung took the picture and sent it to me"

"Oh my god, he's such a creep!", she yells, her eyes moving from the picture to me, "And you're a fucking idiot!"

Well, I don't know what I expected but this reaction was not it

"That guy is a friend and coworker! He's married!", she shouts, "His wife was coming back from a business trip and he had some time to kill before going to meet her at the airport. He said he was going to get something to eat and invited me along"

Ok it's not a date but that guy could still want her

Being married never stopped anyone from cheating

And it doesn't mean she doesn't like him that way either

"And you went", I accuse

"Yes I went!", she snaps, "I went because I couldn't stand being back in this apartment alone for another entire night!"

Her eyes fill with tears and I hate that I'm making her cry yet again

"This entire apartment is filled with you! With memories of you!", she sobs, glaring at me angrily, "I can't handle it. Everything I look at reminds me of you! I can't sit on the couch because all I think about is you sitting there playing a stupid video game or us cuddling while we watched tv"

I swallow hard at the emotion in her voice

I didn't know she thought about us

The last time I saw her...it seemed like she had given up on us

"I can't sleep on your side of the bed or hell even in the middle because all I remember is you holding me all night. The kitchen reminds me of us cooking together. The shower reminds me of you washing my hair and us having soap fights. Every room is filled with you!"

"Jo-", I start, not sure what I want to say but I just want to make her feel better

I was wrong about everything

Again

I thought she was over me

I didn't know she's just as bad as I am

"And you're a fucking idiot if you think I could just go out with someone else after three months of not being with you!", she yells, "That's something you would do, not me!"

"I wouldn't-"

"Shut up!", she cries, "If you don't think that this entire break up hasn't completely devastated me, that I'm not utterly lost without you, then you're a fucking moron! I miss you all the time. You're all I think about. Wondering if you found a new girl to be with and forgot all about me"

"I didn't", I shake my head, "I didn't jagi"

"Three months is not enough time to get over someone I love more than anything in this world", she whispers, "It's not enough time to get over the love of my life, if that's even possible"

Hearing her call me the love of her life keeps the hope I have alive

The hope that she might forgive me and take me back

"You're the love of my life Jo", I tell her

She snorts through tears, "Fuck off Seonghwa"

"No! I won't fuck off ", I say loudly, "You had your turn to speak, now it's mine!"

"There's nothing to say Seonghwa. You've more than proven that I'm nothing you want. You screamed in my face that you don't want me and don't need me. Remember?"

"I was stupid!", I yell, "I was. I did everything wrong but I won't let you think I don't love you. Of course I need you. I love you"

She looks away and I can tell she doesn't know if she should believe me

"Jo, I've never loved anything in my life until you", I confess, "I love you with everything in me baby. I'm going insane without you"

I move closer to her, taking her hand and breathing in relief when she doesn't pull away

"You're all I think about", I tell her, "I miss you so much Jo, it fucking hurts. I'm just as lost without you jagi. Everyday, I wake up in dread because you're not next to me and I remember that I can't see you. I can't just pick up the phone and call you, I can't spend the day with you and it's soul crushing"

I blink away the tears pooling in my eyes from how heartbroken I am without her

"When I saw the picture Wooyoung sent me, I felt like I was dying jagi", I confess, the tears falling down my face, "I...I realized that I really lost you and the thought of you with another guy...fuck it killed me. And it made me realize that I have to change my life to be the man you deserve"

She shakes her head, "You can't change for me Seonghwa. You have to change for you. You'll just end up resenting me if you change for me"

"I am changing for me and for you jagi. I..I need help to do it but I'm going to"

"What are you talking about?", she asks quietly

I take a breath to tell her everything I've started changing once Wooyoung sent me that picture

"I stopped drinking jagi. I got into an AA group and I went to the first meeting yesterday"

I know my drinking was a huge problem

I'd become belligerent, say hurtful things to her, make her cry

I never want to do that again

"Wow, that's...that's really good Seonghwa. That'll help you so much. I'm...I'm happy for you", she says, genuine shock and relief in her face

I nod, glad I can actually show her I'm changing

"I also found a therapist to go to. Psychologist. To talk about the shit I've had to go through when I was young. To get to the bottom of the drinking problem and get better"

Her eyes widen as she takes in my words

"I...uh...I also got a job", I tell her, "A real job with Hongjoong. He's ..he's going to teach me to be a mechanic"

That's something I was always interested in but with my drinking there was no way I could concentrate on trade school and no one would let me work on cars anyway

"Hongjoong hired you?"

"Yeah", I nod, "One uh, one of the conditions to keep working with him is that I stay sober, go to AA meetings and keep seeing the psychologist"

"That's good Seonghwa. He's a good friend to help you like this"

He is

I don't know where I'd be without him

But there is someone else I need

"I need you baby", I whisper

Her eyes break away from mine, darting to the floor, her face unsure

"I don't....know Seonghwa. I miss you and I love you more than anything...but I can't...I can't go through everything again. I can't handle the fights, the way it seems like you hate me when you get angry-"

"I don't hate you. I never hated you baby. I love you more than anything", I tell her, "It'll be hard jagi, I...I may fuck up a bit but I will never let it get like it used to be. I won't be drinking baby so that will cut out a lot of our problems"

"But you might get....irritable because you can't drink"

I nod, knowing that's true

It's what the AA meeting leader said could happen

"Yeah baby, that's when... I...I'll need your help too...if you can"

"You want my help?", she asks quietly

I know it's shocking

I never wanted her help before but now I can't think of anyone better to help me then her

"Yeah baby", I answer, "I..I know they'll be setbacks and it'll be difficult but there's no one I'd rather have by my side than you"

She bites her lip hesitantly

"I can do it easier with you jagi. Please baby, give me one more chance? Come back to me?"

I hold my breath, waiting for her answer

Hoping, praying that she takes me back

"This is your last chance Seonghwa", she says softly, "I understand you may fall off the wagon a few times and I'll help you if that happens but if it gets to be like before....with you out all night, getting drunk every night, flirting, never coming home, fighting with me then it's over for good. Nothing you say will make me take you back"

"I understand jagi", I tell her, hope filling me, "I won't let it get to that, I promise"

She nods, "Ok Hwannie"

"Ok? I...I can come home? With you?", I ask, wanting confirmation

She nods, "You can come home Hwa"

Her words wash over me and I immediately pull her into my arms, holding her tightly, burying my face in her neck and sobbing in relief and utter happiness

"I love you Jo. I love you so much", I cry

Her arms move around me and I break down more, the feeling of being in her arms absolute heaven

"I love you Seonghwa. More than anything in this world baby", she sobs too, her arms so tight around me, "My Hwa"

"Only yours", I assure her, "Just yours. I love you"

"I love you"

Pulling back a little, I look down at my beautiful jagi, wiping her tears away

Leaning down, I kiss her in a loving kiss I've been waiting to feel since I lost her

And it's one of the best kisses she's ever given me

--------------------------------

"I can bring all my stuff back tomorrow, if it's ok?", I ask her as we get into bed

"Yeah baby. Do you need help packing?"

I shake my head, "I just been crashing at Hongjoong's and everything is still in the boxes you packed. I can just load them up into the car and bring them back"

After we kissed, we've just been glued to each other all night

We ordered food then watched TV, cuddling on the couch

I've never been so happy to have her in my arms, to run my fingers in her hair, to just be with her

I'm never giving that, giving her up again

I will make sure I will be the best man I can be

"You never unpacked?"

I shake my head, "No jagi...I...I guess I didn't think we were really over until I saw the picture of you with that guy"

"He's just a friend baby", she says softly, facing me in bed, running her fingers in my hair, "I swear Hwa. I only love you"

I nod

I know

After tonight, after everything she said, I know she only loves me

"And yeah, you can bring all your stuff back tomorrow baby"

I smile, so fucking happy, so grateful I'm back home, with her

She smiles softly, her thumb moving over my lips softly, "I missed your smile Hwannie. I missed you so much"

"I missed you jagi. I swear baby, I didn't know that I could feel that much pain from not being with you. I honestly don't think I can live without you"

She nods, "I know Hwa. I feel the same way baby. I don't want to be away from you ever again. Please don't hurt me again baby"

"I won't", I swear, "Never again jagi. I shouldn't have to begin with and I'm so sorry I hurt you but I swear, never again"

She nods, moving closer, her lips pressing against mine softly in a sweet kiss

My body immediately relaxes into hers, moving my arms around her, pulling her right against me, kissing her desperately

I need her, it feels like her kisses are reviving me and it's just what I need

"I love you", she murmurs after the kiss

"I love you", I tell her, "So much"

She smiles, kisses me again, then cuddles against me

I kiss the top of her head, holding her tightly so grateful she took me back

[howlingday]

Princess Nora's Arc AU, Nora was certainly a unique princess, she's not like princess Weiss who's a sticker for manners and rules, she couldn't care less if anything she just wanted to be herself and have fun. One day she sees a young squire jaune being picked on by the other squires so she scares them off and protects him. When their gone she asks if he's okay which he's not since he's supposed to grow up and defend her not the other way around which she refutes with how she can defend herself. They become friends, maybe noras first ever true friend outisde of politics and jaune promises to pay her back and defend her with his full might when he gets older

Princess & Squire

"And you say you beat them off with a stick?"

"A big one!" Nora said as she beamed at her neighbor princess, Weiss Schnee of the Ice Queendom. "And it was sharp, too."

"So it was a cudgel." Weiss said with a frown. Nora gave her an odd look. "A club." She tilted her head. Weiss, losing her patience, shouted. "A hitting stick!"

"Well, duh!" Nora giggled. "It's not like I had my heels for stabbing!"

"And where were your knights?" Weiss asked, her patience long since worn away. "Surely they would not leave their princess unprotected."

"Believe me, I don't need protecting." Nora chuckled, punching her open palm. "None of those punks will be bothering Jaune any time soon."

"Yes, and regarding Squire Arc-" Nora gave the odd look again, "Jaune. Was he not punished for his failure?"

"What failure?" Nora asked. "He got bullied by the other squires because they're a bunch of assholes."

"Princess Valkyrie!" Weiss stood and smashed her hands against the sitting table. "Your job as the Princess of the Jade Empire is to learn from your studies and become a proper leader for your people! How do you intend to become a respectable empress when you're sprinting through the muddied streets, swinging cudgel like a barbarian while you spout such profanities like a common wharf whore?!"

Nora blinked at the outburst, then proceeded to laugh at her friend. Weiss' face only grew more and more red as Nora continued her guffaw. It was at this point that Jaune poked his head in, only to then retreat back out the door when Weiss' snarling visage turned to his direction. As she calmed down, Nora did what she did best.

Be herself.

"It's easy, Weiss!" She stood up, then turned to the window. "I just have to keep being me. Ren is already the emperor, so all I have to do is just stay alive until he decides to give me the throne. Until then, I'll keep being the toughest princess out having fun. And Jaune'll be right there with me, looking out for me when I can't look out for myself."

"You really are a child." Weiss shook her head with a sigh before falling into her seat. "You're lucky your brother is the emperor, otherwise you and I wouldn't be having this conversation."

"Well, duh, the only reason we're talking anyways is 'cuz your dad wants us to be friends so he can have good relations with our empire." Weiss blinked. "What? Just because I like having fun doesn't mean I can't be aware of the political intricacies of the realms both inside and outside the empire."

"No, I... I guess not." Weiss flushed a bit at being so callously shown up. "Still, your knights should be doing the fighting for you. Squire Vasilias is already showing great promise as my personal guard!"

"I dunno," Nora swayed her lips side to side, "I'm pretty Jaune's already won against him at rock, paper, scissors."

"What?" Before she could answer, she watched Nora tip-toe to the door where their personal guards stood by. She pressed her ear to the door before flinging them wide open. Jaune had his palm flat while Neptune held a fist. Paper beats rock. "NEPTUNE!"

"Um..." Neptune gulped, the squire caught in his charges deadly, icy gaze. "I, uh, won at least two."

"Uh-huh, out of how many?" Nora asked, looking to her squire.

"Uh, I lost count at fifteen games, No- I mean, Princess Valkyrie."

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I (30F) the asshole for possibly being part of the reason someone (50? F) got laid off? So there was a lady who started at my work about a year ago. We work in a field with a lot of deadlines, and we're in different departments. But the office space is one huge open area, so if people are talking loud enough we can hear them from across the room. Normally this isn't an issue, since most of our work is done on computers. A lot of the people we work with in her department actually work virtually, so we don't get to see them in person much. But she was in-office. We also had a working relationship with her predecessor that was solid enough that he'd trust us to do some things on our side of the project without checking in first. He also understood the sheer volume of deadlines we had to work with in a day, and if we ended up a little late on his assignment because the previous assignments were more chaotic than expected, he wouldn't get upset. She, on the other hand, did not understand what took us so long, or that there were deadlines that we absolutely had to get through before we could start on her projects. She would yell and swear loudly at her computer at the person assigned to her project for the night, especially if they made a mistake, or what she perceived as a mistake due to not understanding how our systems had to operate to meet these deadlines. One day I was assigned to her project, and I heard her yelling and swearing at me from her desk. I'd made a mistake while juggling multiple other projects, but it was something fixable well in advance of her deadline. She started telling me off on the chat program we use, as I tried to explain what happened. I took a screenshot of that conversation and showed it to my boss, because it wasn't the first time it had happened to someone working on her project, and frankly I was a bit tired of hearing her shout at us. But the next day I talked to some of my coworkers about it, and realized that she likely didn't know we actually worked in the same room, let alone the same building as her. So I came up and introduced myself.

And...things did seem to get a bit better after that. She stopped yelling at the computer as much.

Not completely, though. And she still yelled at the other people in her department if they screwed up. Or if they were running late. I actually bought noise cancelling headphones to help block her out. It got to the point where I started prioritizing helping her on her department's projects above others, just so my department wouldn't have to hear her swearing and complaining from across the room. I think she was called into HR once about it, but I don't know details there.

I did, however, talk to my coworkers more about her, and mention that I'd been focusing on these projects more than others just to try to stop the yelling. Which...the way this office works could easily have been passed on to upper management. Cut to a couple weeks ago when I got back from a short vacation, and I realized I hadn't seen her around for a couple weeks before or after that. I asked someone in that department if she was on vacation, and they said she'd gotten laid off. They didn't give any more details. I don't know if what I said had anything to do with her being laid off. I'm worried it might have. I didn't want her to lose her job, I just wanted the yelling to stop.

What are these acronyms?

[destinygoldenstar]

Okay so I said I was gonna rant about this scene, so...

So, if you've seen my Episode 11 reaction of Season 1 of Disventure Camp, you know how... PISSED I was at a certain scene to say the least. To the point where I couldn't even talk coherently about it.

I wanted to explain myself and what MY POV of the scene was.

DISCLAIMER: this post is being made by somebody who, at the time of this post, has NOT watched past this episode. So any and all information regarding context for this scene revealed AFTER this episode (This season or another season) is IRRELEVANT to what I am talking about. I am ONLY going off of information revealed in Season 1 prior to this episode, and that's it.

Bottom line is, now that I am calmer and able to think coherently about it, I can safely say that my hatred for this scene was... SUBJECTIVE.

I hated it because it personally brought back a lot of moments in my own life, and as a result, when I watched the scene over and over again for the sake of this post, no matter what, my blood boils.

And I'm not even saying objectively this is a terrible scene writing-wise. After all, Total Drama, the show THIS show was inspired by, has quite a lot of characters doing... morally questionable things for the sake of the grand prize. So I am perfectly used to, and expected, seeing characters with less than perfect personalities, motivations, and actions.

So with that in mind, just because something like this happens in these kinds of shows, DOESN'T mean the show is saying you the audience should apply these actions to real life. They are merely telling a story and showing what a downfall looks like.

Yes I know what media literacy is.

As much as some people probably want to play the blame game just because it's easier to justify certain opinions, at the end of the day, THIS IS NOT A BLACK AND WHITE ISSUE. IT'S FAR MORE COMPLICATED THAN THAT.

So with that in mind, I should make it clear that my harshness on the scene does NOT have to do with the character that gets hurt in the scene.

I feel like even the most hardcore vile Jake hater that wants him dead on sight, would have to admit even for a second that MAYBE Ellie is kinda not perfect with her logic here.

(Why'd you all want to kill this guy so much? Holy shit...)

So for context of the scene alone, Jake and Ellie are at the end of the challenge and need to decide which one of them claims immunity, both needing it. Jake offers a forgiveness of the shit that happened prior between them, but only if she gives him the immunity.

And Ellie decides not only "NO" but she also takes the opportunity to READ JAKE FOR FILTH.

So, to quote her words:

"You know what? You can eat shit and die."

"And 'Boo Hoo, Aww, I Got Cheated On'. Grow the hell up, Jake."

"You say you're a victim, but you're really just a sponge for drama."

"You feed off the smallest setbacks, acting as if the world's against you."

"Tom probably saw it too. You have no right to shame me."

"After you voted out Gabby, I never pulled this on you, cause I have some sense to not be a dick."

"Maybe if you weren't so annoying, your boyfriend wouldn't have cheated on you."

OUT OF CONTEXT, what does all of that read for you?

Probably something on the lines of, "Oh yay, this girl is roasting this man and calling him out on his bullshit and asshole behavior."

BUT THEN YOU LEARN THE CONTEXT, and you learn that this girl personally went after the dude's trauma to destroy his relationship with someone else, and is saying this to JUSTIFY her actions by saying "Well no, you deserved it, and you can't go after me cause I did nothing wrong. It was all you."

Yeah...

So when I said this wasn't a black and white issue, I wasn't kidding.

For more context on these characters, both of them are participating in a reality show where the prize is $1,000,000.

Ellie is a young adult with a dream to study fashion design, but she can't afford the funds for the college she's in. She's desperately in debt, being forced to work two jobs every day from dawn to dusk and having next to no spare time on her own to do the things she loves. Not for anything. Not for friendships or relationships either.

So she read to me at the start of the show as a bit of a gloomy introvert who finds it hard to let people in or see the bright side of things. And in the first half of the show, I'd say two people changed that for her: Gabby and Jake.

Gabby more so, because love interest. She's the one who gave Ellie a sense of hope in things, and went out of her way to save Ellie's spot in the game (at the cost of her own, tragically), because Ellie was a good and caring friend towards her and did not judge people before knowing them fully.

KEEP THAT IN MIND. Ellie DOES NOT JUDGE PEOPLE BEFORE GETTING TO KNOW THEM.

When Ellie gets betrayed by Alec, she's kicked off of her team and joins the other team, AKA, the team Jake is on. She quickly gets acquainted in him and the get along nicely. The only problem was that Jake, at the moment, was pretty salty regarding his own love interest, Tom, because Tom lied to him about his career.

Rather than write him off as a 'moody brat', Ellie sits down and tries to talk reason to Jake, and even offers to hear his side of the story to get an understanding as to why he acts the way he does.

The scene with them cuts away just as Jake is about to trauma dump to her, BUT we the audience already knew of Jake's trauma, so we can easily infer that this was where Ellie got information on Jake's personal trauma.

And even if she didn't, right before the scene on topic, Jake was ranting to her that she didn't know what it was like for him to go through that.

So yes, regardless of when she knew, Ellie DOES know what happened to Jake. The claim that 'Ellie was ignorant', as a result, is FALSE.

Ellie also offers Jake advice on how to approach Tom, giving him valuable lesson on not jumping to conclusions and talking things out to people.

ELLIE SAID THIS TO JAKE. KEEP THIS IN MIND. SHE'S THE ONE WHO GAVE THIS ADVICE TO HELP HIM OUT.

Their friendship remains on good terms with mutual respect for a bit. When the team loses and they have to vote someone off, everyone BUT Jake and Gabby voted out Ellie because she was the new girl. Gabby would NEVER vote Ellie, let's be real, so that's not surprising at all. Plus it was thanks to Gabby's idol that Ellie survived that Tribal Council.

Jake was a shocker in this regard though. Despite his connections with Miriam and Tom, he refused to join the popular crowd on the team and instead chose to throw his vote on Gabby. Looking back at that choice, it's such a subtle sign of respect that Jake has gained for Ellie and how she helped him.

The next episode, Jake DOES decide to join Tom and Miriam in voting off Gabby, Ellie's closest companion in the game. That SOUNDS like a stab in the back, but there's a scene where Jake talks to Ellie about this and comes clean to her about what he's doing.

And Ellie... takes this well.

She completely respects his decision, and agrees that she would not take this vote as a personal attack, because... it's not. It's just a vote.

He's not trying to destroy Ellie's relationship with Gabby, or trying to spite Ellie by voting Gabby, he's merely casting a vote as the game wants.

Could they have voted for anyone else? OH YEAH.

BUT TO BE FAIR, Grett had immunity, and Jake, at that point, had no connection with Fiore and Alec, and Fiore in particular tried to get on Jake, Tom, and Miriam's good side earlier in the episode. So I MOSTLY blame Gabby's elimination on the Fiore Alec and Grett alliance, because unlike Jake, they DIDN'T tell Ellie jack shit and went behind her back.

There is no evidence in the next couple of episodes that Ellie has any beef towards Jake regarding voting off Gabby. At least, not until the scene on topic. She mostly directs her beef towards Alec for betraying her trust for the second time.

And then he would do it again a third time-god you need to get better allies Ellie.

But then by Episode 10, Ellie is reminded of her outcast situation among the cast. She's on good terms with Jake, thus she's in the Jake Tom and Miriam alliance, the majority at that point. Even Miriam came around and apologized to Ellie for misjudging her. Unless Fiore and/or Alec got immunity, those two were for sure gone.

But after they were gone, or voting them out wasn't an option, would that lead to Ellie's elimination? For no other reason other than she's the one with the weakest bonds with the others? Jake and Tom are lovers, and Miriam is their surrogate grandmother. They are a found family. And Ellie is just... the friend tagging along.

She was so outcasted that she died on the first day in the zombie simulation and they just forgot about her.

Oh, AND Tom cut her arm off. That's not cool.

And Ellie CANNOT afford to lose this game. Her whole lifestyle is on the line. More so than any of the others. She HAS to win this, otherwise she might never get another chance to financially achieve her dreams. (CURSE YOU GOVERNMENT)

So, in other words, she has to screw her relationships and strategize.

It's a completely understandable and empathetic motive, probably one even more empathetic than any of the Total Drama character's motives.

In that circumstance, as the numbers go down, does it all come down to popularity or strategy? When you're unpopular among your peers and that could be an elimination sentence, do you let that happen or do you take matters into your own hands?

So Ellie, reluctantly, goes to Fiore and Alec again to side with them on the votes. But that would just be a 3-3 tie and there was no guarantee they would survive the tiebreaker.

So their plan to solve this issue was...

*groan*

Trigger Jake's insecurities and manipulate him into destroying his relationship with Tom.

...

Ellie was hesitant, but she was convinced it was the only option she had to save herself.

She could've instead just stolen that godforsaken immunity idol that Tom found since she knew he had it BUT I DIGRESS.

The plan works perfectly, and Jake and Tom's relationship is destroyed, resulting in an ugly break up.

But Fiore outs Ellie for her scheme, (betraying her YET AGAIN), resulting in Ellie becoming he true outcast of the group, as not only are the villains dumping her, but Jake is OUT FOR BLOOD.

Ellie apologizes to Jake for what happened, expressing her remorse for what she had done. She proved herself before as a good friend who had the best intentions and wanted to help Jake, despite not having reason to put up with him. And she betrayed that.

And I do believe that she does feel guilty over what she had done.

She doesn't get sick pleasure from hurting others like Fiore does. She simply did the deed because she felt like she had to.

But Jake not only doesn't forgive her, but he also refuses to hear out her side of the story or her reasonings, and continues to rant about how pissed he was at her THE ENTIRE EPISODE.

Even when she saves his life from a scorpion, he STILL gives her shit.

And you can TELL from her facial expressions that she was just DONE with everyone telling her she was the one that was full of shit.

And it wasn't just Jake. Earlier in the episode, Miriam called Ellie out and told her off, saying that her personally attacking Jake and Tom that was was WRONG.

And Ellie continues to DEFEND her actions instead of hearing them out, saying it was 'gameplay' and 'she needed to win' and 'friendships would've ruined her life'.

HMM, SHE'S NOT HEARING OUT THE OTHERS SIDE OF THE STORY AND INSTEAD CHOOSING TO DEFEND HERSELF AND GIVE THE OTHER PERSON SHIT. WHO DOES THAT SOUND LIKE?!

YOU DAMN HYPOCRITE.

(Hypocrisy is not bad characterization. It's very human and it's very real. I'm just saying it angrily cause it's an annoying trait in real life too)

And that leads to the scene on topic, where Ellie decides NOT to repair her friendship with Jake. She decides to ditch it, vouch for herself, and defend herself to the very end, even at the cost of Jake's psyche.

She's too caught up in justifying herself that her judgement and remorse earlier is completely clouded, and her empathy is secondary to her ambition and greed.

It's a tragic "She's too far gone" moment.

Now in her defense, (Yeah, I know), nobody was even trying to listen to her or understand her. They all merely only cared about their own personal feelings, and what they wanted from her. JAKE MOST OF ALL.

So due to her interactions with Jake before to understand who he was, she knew very well what his setbacks were and used them to her advantage to hit him where it hurt.

So no, I do not believe Ellie is making assumptions about Jake when she makes her rant in this moment. She KNOWS what she's talking about, and I think she genuinely believes, in her mind, that she is telling Jake what he needs to hear...

But uh... OH BOY NO.

I'm sorry girl, but NO.

On the other side of this, we have Jake.

Idk if Jake is a young adult or a late teenager, somebody's gonna have to clarify that for me. He joined the show while his beloved grandmother, who he claims was the only person in his life who truly understood him, was bedridden. At the start of the show, he joined with the intent of attempting to win the show and help her out...

Unfortunately, in the middle of the season, she passed away. So...

Yeah, that's heartbreaking, I have to imagine.

At the start of the show, he's basically the 'shy but sweet and kind cinnamon roll with a bite'. He was working with Tom, his crush, as the ones doing the heavy lifting in getting survival supplies for the group, and was the only one on that team who attempted friendly socialization with his teammates.

And yes, I mean that. Tom was more hostile due to his job, Miriam was the cranky old lady who pushed away everyone, Dan only cared about alliances, Grett was a bad bitch, Gabby was an outcast, and Drew... couldn't even talk.

It was JAKE who was trying to form genuine bonds with some of the people around him, seeing the best in them. He saw through Tom's mask right from the start and supported his leadership of the team, and he was the only one who showed kindness to Miriam even when she pushed him away.

And while I would NOT consider Jake a good strategic player of the game, that's also because he had no intention to 'use' anybody. He just wanted to form bonds with them.

He read to me as someone who craves bonds. Love. In all forms.

He says that his grandmother was the only one who truly understood him. Which implied that the rest of family... might not be the most loving people. Do I think it's an abusive household? No. But rather one that sounds... cold. Distant.

Or maybe they're homophobic. Idk.

I mean, he calls this 'Shawn' guy over his own parents. Even Grett called her parents, and her parents are shit. (Idk who Shawn is, whether that's a friend or a sibling. Someone needs to clarify that for me.)

There's also Jake's anxieties around cemeteries. His grandfather passed away when he was a kid, and he would always go with his family to send flowers. Which surrounded him with death and loss... how god knows how many years. Idk, if forcing a child to be around a place that gives them anxiety all the time doesn't scream a cold and misunderstanding parent, idk what does.

I feel like it was that episode where the signs started to show, that "OH. This boy is NOT a cinnamon roll. He's got issues."

And then as the season went on, he shows a lot more... uh... FLAWS.

Yeah, I know, a flawed character? That's like having the plague.

He has a lot of anxieties about certain things, such as his own fears of death and loss (probably why he decided "It's a perfect time to join a reality show!"), and with people possibly using him.

It's implied that the time between this and the show is narrow. Jake was previously in a toxic relationship that fell apart when his ex, (not named), cheated on him. He couldn't get over it, and they split.

This may also be my angsty brain talking and I'm reading too much into it, but he also says when talking about the subject he "got hurt". And during the Episode 10 'believing the lie' segment, he expresses concern about how EVERYONE sees him as an idiot they can use. They can CONTROL him. They ALL take advantage of him and deceive him for their own gain.

No, it's not S/A, there's no hints of that sort of thing, but that still heavily implies that this previous relationship caused... quite a bit of PTSD from what happened in such.

So... yeah, it drives my point further that Jake is an anxious paranoid bean who just wants to be loved by people. Above all else.

He succeeds at forming a bond with Miriam and getting her to open up to everyone, and she even calls him 'the grandchild she never had'. He also forms a bond with Tom, gets a crush on him, and gets him to open up about his intentions, and scars, and not be ashamed of them. They even kiss. How wholesome.

And then it's revealed to Jake that Tom is a spy, and has been lying to Jake this whole time about such...

And he BLOWS UP at Tom's face about it.

Yeah, so Jake may or may not be very impulsive and emotional.

This man DOES NOT think before he speaks. He holds a lot of grudges. He has no problem speaking his mind. And he loves to talk about his own past experiences with others, regardless if they ask, to 'bond' with them to get them to understand him better.

(He just like me fr)

While Tom is part of the blame too, because... he lied. Jake soured their relationship by not hearing him out and continued to lash out.

And then Ellie joined the team after a swap with her and Grett, and she quickly becomes acquainted with Jake. She notices Jake's conflict with Tom, and she offers to understand his side of the story. He tries to brush her off, not wanting to do yet another trauma dump, but she insists, and assures him that she's very respectful and understanding.

And so she's the one to give Jake the advice to hear out Tom's side of the story, apologize, and try to mend their bond. Advice he actually takes, as he apologizes to Tom, several times, and fully confesses to his selfishness in the situation.

Tom shuts him down several times because... it's Tom. But at least on Jake's end, he's the one to take the first step in admitting his wrongs and making up for it.

It was thanks to Ellie, a newfound friend, that was able to get through to him and get him to cool off. And I feel like it's because of her doing that, that he stuck up for her and refused to vote her.

Going back to Jake seeing good in people, Jake was the only one besides Gabby who didn't join the popular crowd in voting Ellie. He saw that she was not a bad person and willingly gave her a chance when no one else did.

Again, besides Gabby, but Gabby already knew Ellie before Ellie joined the team. So it's even more impressive for Jake, who just met her.

As impulsive, paranoid, and messy Jake is, it NEVER came across to me as he WANTS to be that way. These are all coping mechanisms to people constantly using him and deceiving him throughout his life that are on autopilot. He thinks emotionally. And said emotions cloud is better judgement.

Oh gee, it's almost like he's a human being.

So... imagine how Jake feels when the friend that helped him comes up to him and says that his crush is a scumbag who is using him.

Just like his ex did...

Yeah, that's gonna trigger some PTSD and cause Jake to act irrationally.

In Jake's defense (again), he DID consider that maybe something wasn't right, that it was a lie, and that Tom wouldn't do this to him. But it was Ellie who kept on gaslighting him with his own trauma to prevent him from pursuing a conversation with Tom.

So... yeah. I really can't blame Jake for not talking to Tom about it, cause, uh... he NEVER had the chance. Ellie wouldn't let him have the chance. What was he supposed to do?

But Jake DID ultimately fall for the trap and believed the lie, which was the driving force of giving the villains the opening they needed to vote off Tom...

...with the deciding factor being Jake's own vote on Tom. That he likely did as a throwaway vote.

Shit.

Yeah, and then Ellie gets outed by Fiore as the one who lied, deceived, and used him, personally using his trauma to destroy the relationship he formed. And once it's outed it's already too late, as Jake is only left to BEG for forgiveness that he does not get, as Tom denounces their relationship entirely.

Ellie used him. Ellie took advantage of him. Ellie ruined what he had. Ellie caused this.

So is it any wonder that Jake is pissed at her? I know I would be.

This was very personal shit for him. His relationship with Tom was something special for him. It was a rekindling of love, and validating for Jake that he could help someone for the better and bond with them. And in a day, it's all gone, with only Jake being the one blamed.

All because a so called 'friend' wanted money.

So of course Jake is not going to hear Ellie out at all, or forgive her. To him, this is just Ellie showing her true colors. That she's just like everyone else who hurt him and used him and controlled him.

Jake does NOT have to forgive Ellie for that. That's his choice. Especially if he's upset with her.

What really surprised me was Jake's offer forgive Ellie by giving him immunity.

This could mean two things: One, he genuinely wants to cool off and give her another chance. Or Two, he's testing her and seeing if she'd choose friendship over the money.

I think it could be both.

Either way, she declines his offer, and then begins to SHAME him for everything he's been feeling the entire episode.

"You can't shame Ellie. Ellie's not the one at fault for you losing Tom. It was YOU."

"It's YOUR fault, Jake."

"You deserved it, Jake."

"You're an annoying piece of shit, and no one will ever love you."

And... well, I think his face at the end said it all. That HURT him.

I wouldn't be surprised if Jake has gained even MORE PTSD from his experience on the show, and this in particular.

And I wouldn't be surprised if Jake is ten times worse in another season because of these experiences. Hostile, whining, difficult to work with, and not trusting anyone ever again. And also self loathing cause he'd think no one would want him or love him anyway.

But that was 'calling out'. Wouldn't that make Jake want to be better instead of regress as worse than he was before?

Well, here's my beef, if this was supposed to be 'Ellie calling Jake out' it did NOT work as that. That instead came across as shaming.

The reason I analyzed both characters was so you could understand that I am not trying to glorify one or the other. Especially when I say this.

‘Girlboss moment’ this is definitely not.

Ellie ditching Alec? That was a great girlboss moment. Dude deserved it. And she didn’t have to shame him for how shit he treats his family to do it.

But THIS?!

I’m sorry, but everything she said in that speech was quite bullshit and not well thought out.

Now, I am all for Jake getting called out. Like I said, there ARE things worth calling out. Jake DOES deserve to get called out for certain traits.

But this is not how you do it.

So let me debunk all these lines:

"You know what? You can eat shit and die."

That’s a death threat.

Plain and simple.

“Eat shit and die” IS a death threat.

This woman gave him a death threat.

INSTANT NO.

"And 'Boo Hoo, Aww, I Got Cheated On'. Grow the hell up, Jake."

Okay, 50/50

On the one hand, Jake does whine about his personal life. A lot.

On the other hand, this is also downplaying Jake’s trauma with that issue. Regardless on how you feel about it, it clearly has an effect on them and shouldn’t be brushed off as ‘oh they’re just being whiny’.

How would you like it if I downplayed YOUR issues, Ellie?

“Boo hoo, I’m in debt and I can’t follow my dreams and I’m an outcast” Grow up Ellie.

DOESN’T FEEL GOOD, DOES IT?

"You say you're a victim, but you're really just a sponge for drama."

Um… except he IS a victim?

I’m sorry, but think about it.

Idk the full details of Jakes previous relationship, but I think getting cheated on definitely counts as being a victim of that circumstance.

Also, YOU USED HIM, YOU FIORE AND ALEC DEVISED A PLOT TO USE HIM.

Don’t act like that’s not him being a victim when you’re the orchestrator.

Also “You’re really just a sponge for drama”. And you aren’t? And Fiore isn’t? And Grett isn’t? And Tom isn’t?

I guess Ellie didn’t witness the majority of her team getting eliminated because of a child being a sponge for drama.

"You feed off the smallest setbacks, acting as if the world's against you."

For that to be true, Jake would actively be doubling down on every time he’s ever yelled at someone for something. Except that’s not the case.

For that to be true, he would never recognize he’s at fault and apologize over and over. Except that’s not the case.

For that to be true, he wouldn’t care for Miriam in the beginning. Of Tom. Or you.

"Tom probably saw it too. You have no right to shame me."

He DOES have a right to shame you.

YOU HURT HIM.

AND YOU KNOW YOU HURT HIM.

This is STRAIGHT UP Ellie saying “It’s not my fault, it’s yours, because I said so. You can’t blame me.”

"After you voted out Gabby, I never pulled this on you, cause I have some sense to not be a dick."

Again, Jake came clean to you about voting Gabby. And you were cool with it. You said it yourself. This is the only time you’ve ever shown beef about that.

AND Fiore Alec and Grett betrayed your trust cause you didn’t know they were gonna vote Gabby. So you’re gonna blame JAKE? Okay??

Also, what analogy is that supposed to be?

Supposedly she’s comparing this to Tom’s elimination. But those eliminations are not comparable.

Did Jake toy with your personal feelings and relationship with Gabby to vote her off? No?

SO WHAT THE HELL??

"Maybe if you weren't so annoying, your boyfriend wouldn't have cheated on you."

THIS. THIS RIGHT HERE.

NO. JUST STRAIGHT UP NO.

This is something SO VILE, that I actually physically cannot understand it if you tell me that’s a ‘good roast’.

That is not what this is. Again, this is SHAMING.

This whole thing is her shaming Jake for his trauma and digging it in his head that he deserved all of it. Because ‘he’s annoying’.

Ellie doesn’t know WHY the ex cheated on Jake (unless Jake told her off screen). Maybe it was because the ex found Jake annoying, idk. BUT THAT MAKES IT EVEN WORSE.

That triggers so much more of the trauma in that moment as ‘he left you because you were annoying’, and definitely brought back some shit.

Imagine someone who knows that you were abused by someone tells you that because they don’t like a certain trait of yours, you deserved the abuse. NO. NO ONE DESERVES TO HAVE THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO THEM, REGARDLESS IF YOU HATE THEIR CHARACTER.

That doesn’t mean abused people can’t be bad people. Nor does past abuse excuse bad actions. But it’s something that at least shouldn’t be shamed because, in what world, is abuse the victims fault?

Saying this stuff to someone makes the person’s psyche so much worse. They not only feel attacked, but it’s a kick starter to a lot of dangerous self loathing and anxiety, which could lead to them acting worse.

How do I know this? Because I’ve been there personally.

Yeah that’s another reason why I was so hurt by this scene. It just did a lot of personal flashes in my head. I’m in a better place now, but in terms of my past in school as a teen, I was Jake. I was whiny, impulsive, beefed with all my bullies, and loved to rant to strangers. The reason being that the school environment was giving me so much anxiety and problems, and no one wanted to help me. I was a pain in the ass and everyone hated me. Some would even say it aloud knowing I was in hearing range “I can’t stand *my real name*” “I know, right? She’s so annoying!” Most of them would bully and harass me KNOWING I would react emotionally and just wanted a kick out of it.

I wasn’t cheated on. That never happened to me. But I did have a toxic friendship that lasted for years. I got hurt very badly. I was used, manipulated for my attempted kindness, shamed whenever anything good happened-it was not good. Then they got into drugs and I left before I could fall victim too. Idk where they are now and I don’t care.

And then the teachers, AKA, the adults, sided with them and not me and joined in on shaming me. Even stopping the whole activity just to talk down to me and discredit me.

So… you can imagine the flashbacks I got from watching this scene.

Bottom line is, I got help, I moved out, and I like to think I’m a much better and more mature person now. Still struggle with anxiety though.

But hey, I guess there was no other way Ellie could’ve approached that.

Oh wait no. Because there’s ANOTHER ‘calling out’ scene in the SAME episode.

The one where Miriam calls out Ellie for her personal attacks.

Miriam didn’t go after Ellie’s personal stuff at all in that. She was calm, she listened to Ellie’s defenses, and she countered them accordingly. It was clear she was saying that with good intentions to help Ellie recognize her mistakes. Ellie didn’t listen, but that’s not Miriam’s fault.

THAT is how you call out a loved one for their wrong actions. You have to consider their feelings, tell when what they did wrong, and be there to help them improve in themselves.

You don’t shame personal stuff like this.

Now, I’m not saying that the scene is bad writing. Maybe Ellie going at this the wrong way IS the intention of the scene and we’re supposed to not side with her. But if that was the case wouldn’t everyone be saying she crossed a line here? Regardless if you’re an Ellie Stan or not.

For Jake especially, Miriam would be the harsh judge I imagine to call him out on his actions and behavior, to have him recognize that he was part of the blame for Tom leaving him. That he was stupid, impulsive, and there was a reason he’s so easy to be taken advantage of.

I got a talking down like that from my own parents, and it really opened my eyes to how shitty I was.

So I feel like this scene is gonna have significant consequences to Jake’s psyche. As much as I would love to see Jake realize his faults and redeem into a better person, I have a gut feeling that’s not where this direction is going and he’s just gonna get worse until everyone hates him.

It just won’t be in Season 1 because it’s close to the end and Jake is… you know…

Ellie has far more routable motivations than Jake does. But she went at this the absolute wrong way.

Should’ve just stole the idol.

And you know what’s worse than not stealing the idol? SHE DIDNT EVEN NEED TO DO THIS.

It was BECAUSE of this scene that she lost the challenge! If she actually WAS all about gameplay, she would have just said ‘no’ to Jakes offer, shoved him, and left. And she would’ve won. BUT NO.

If you ask me, writing wise, Ellie should’ve just gotten the immunity. I think that would’ve made a lot more sense than Alec snagging it last minute. Jake and Ellie were never voting together anyway.

They could’ve. But it’s because of their own issues that they refused, didn’t see the light, and caused this whole thing.

Huh. I guess that’s why the scene is called ‘Lights Out’.

Anyway, there’s my rant. Fuck this scene.

[celiastjamesoscar]

Professors either are your best friends or your ultimate enemy. That dude needs to take a chill pill. He probably gets off on causing his students misery. Jon, on the other hand, seems so cool and like a fun dude! His love for pictures is everything, I adore it. If you can talk to him about gambling then he's really a chill guy. 4 finals, that's manageable! I'm the same study type as you; procrastinating it and only doing it a short time beforehand. But, I'm the prime example for this bad behavior. Don't be like me and fuck up your finals. So listen up, I will boss you around one more time. You will start studying early on and really put your heart and soul into it. The relief you will feel afterwards will be the greatest thing ever! Listen to me, miss ma'am.

Omg yes Sam and Butter are sharing one brain cell! Oh Sam definitely enjoyed his ball, especially since he lost his two... The new tattoos will be smaller, fineline ones. 1 is an ufo sucking in a human with "get in loser" on top. The other one will be a devil lady (naked) waking up from a nap inside of a coffin. The best news about all of this is that THE HOT MILF WILL BE DOING THE TATTOOS!!!!

Well... technically I'm already "fired" so they can't do anything. After my apprentices is over they couldn't offer me a job so I'm being let go. And because that company is really shitty and never treated us well, I don't give a fuck anymore and will call in sick. I already called in today. Hey! Cutting a banana is hard work! I held it in my hand (first mistake) and cut through it. Then I looked away because I got distracted (second mistake) and somehow cut my thumb. The one that held the knife. I genuinely don't even know how I did that...

YES GRACE THANK YOU!! I just grabbed that poor girl while she was stealing the pigs food. She's so soft and warm and fluffy. Hennifer even looked at me and put her head on my shoulder!!

Lol I don't think her poor husband stands a chance against a bunch of obsessed ladies. We will definitely win and kindly surprise adopt Melissa. I'm sure she wouldn't even mind...

That’s honestly so true about professors. My chemistry one, the guy who gave me a zero, is a complete asshole. It’s safe to say that my evaluation of him will be a long and hefty one. Jon is honestly the goat, im sad that I’m only going to have him for one more semester. although I will be glad that I won’t have to worry about an embarrassing picture of me making it into the slides 😭 4 finals isn’t too bad, and I don’t think any of them are on the same day. At least I hope not. I’m honestly the worst when it comes to studying, but I plan to use tomorrow as a study day, so don’t worry! And to make you proud, I finished my article review paper tonight and turned it in, instead of waiting until tomorrow to do it, which is when it’s due! It was supposed to be 4 pages, but it turned out to be 6 😬

Not Sam losing his 2 other balls! I got Butters 6 tennis balls a couple months ago, and now he only has 2 left 😭 Butters has been a handful today; first he came in from playing in the backyard with a small abrasion on his head which I had to clean it, and now he’s gotten welts around his mouth and on his nose. It looks like he had an allergic reaction to something, but I’m making him sleep in my room so I can keep an eye on him. My two boy animals have caused so much trouble 😭

But your tattoo ideas are amazing!! I remember you sending in those pictures of them too, and I can’t wait for you to get them!! AND THE HOT MILF IS DOING THEM?!?! YOU BETTER BE SENDING IN THE FINISHING WORKS!!

Well since you are technically already “fired,” I guess there are no consequences for calling off work, especially if the company can’t treat the workers properly. And you know what, you absolutely deserve that time off for your traumatic experience with cutting the banana. How the hell did you manage to cut your thumb that was holding the knife??? That’s what I want to know, like how is that even possible 😭

you snatching Hennifer while she was being a menace and stealing the pigs food is honestly gold!! And she even rested her head on your shoulder, that’s so cute!! Also, I absolutely lock her name so much!! It reminds me of Yennefer from The Witcher series. We used to have chickens but we had to get rid of them because A.) they were too loud and B.) my brother got attacked by the rooster and I got in trouble for recording it 🙄

Melissa herself said that her husband doesn’t get jealous, so I’m sure we could figure something out to where we all win 🤷🏻‍♀️

[misses-winter-soldier]

Broken+broken=fixed

Steve chetead on you but Bucky's there to show you what love really is.

Steve x reader -> Bucky x reader

Mention of cheating

Part1

Part 2

1 month later

Bucky and I have sleepovers and cuddle sessions almost every night and besides that he speaks to me. He talks about the 40s all day long. It's cute. He started trying to catch up with the movies, books, music and fashion. We spend a lot of time together now and it's great. We cook together every day, we have weekly movie nights and weekends are for therapy sessions with each other, which, idk how much it helps him other then getting things off his chest.

Steve is still gone. He hasn't called me in 3 weeks now. I text him everyday and he replies maybe once a week or only if it's something about his buddy.

"Hey y/n! Tell me you don't have plans for tonight pls pls!"

"Haha . I don't but why?"

"I wanna watch Ice age! Really really bad and i know it s not Friday yet but please please please can we watch it?"

He's adorable. No wait. I can't think that. I have a boyfriend.

"Y/n? You ok?"

"Oh um yeah. I just zoomed out for a sec. And yes we can watch it. I love ice age"

"Are sure you're ok? Look i know I'm a little hard to deal most times and really sore if I'm being to clingy or smth like that. You can say no. It's cool. you're already doing so much for me"

"Hey none of that. I like hanging out with you and i do love ice age. It s just.... Today's the day Steve and i made it official and it's just a bit hard. I feel like we just drifted apart and I've done everything i could to get us back up but it doesn't seem to work.... I've just been thinking about our relationship and it feels like he doesn't want to be with me. I'm sorry i should tell you all of this"

"Why do you think that?"

"Pffffff! He has been cold and distant for months. I can't remember the last time he as much as hugged me.... He is gone most of the time and when he's here he's out. Comes home very late and bolts out after breakfast. He ignores my calls and only texts me back when he want something. I called him this morning. He declined my call. So i texted him i still haven't gotten any reply. Just seen. It hurts. Because i don't know what's happening. Why he acts this way. Idk if i did something to upset him or of he just lost interest. Maybe there's someone else...."

I didn't even realize I'm crying until he wiped off some tears off my cheeks.

"I know Steve. He wouldn't cheat on you, ok? And I've seen you with him. You take care off him and I've seen the way you look at him. You're beautiful and kind, you're sweet and caring and you put up with both of us which is just wow. My point is he has no reason to lose interest in you. He works a lot and it's a very stressful job so maybe he s distance come from not wanting to take it out on you. Talk to him. I'm sure he will explain everything." He hugs me.

Damn i miss hugs.

"I can't talk to someone who ignores me Buck.. let's watch the movie. I'll make popcorn "

While I was in the kitchen Bucky called Steve.

"Hello?"

Did Steve become a woman? Wtf is this?

"Um hi? Who is this? I'm Sharon. Steves girlfriend. Who s this?"

"Put him on the phone right now!"

"Hey Buck"

"HEY BUCK? ARE YOU SERIOUS? WHO THE FUCK WAS THAT BITCH STEVE? WHY DID SHE SAY SHE'S YOUR GIRLFRIEND?"

"Buck just calm down ok. Are you good? Why did you call?'

"Oh I'm calm. And I'm ok. I'm perfect actually. You know why? Because your girlfriend is taking care of my perky ass. You know? Y/n. In case you forget which girlfriend I'm talking about. And i guess it doesn't matter why i called anymore. Have fun you asshole "

"Wait. Come on man. "

"I'll called because y/n just cried in MY arms because if YOU. Because of what at ass you've been. But it's pointless to talk to you about it. Obviously you don't care. Have fun with your whore"

"Are you gonna tell her?"

" No. You are. I'll give you 24h to end things. Idc what you tell her. "

"Are you serious?"

"Yes. 24h or I'll tell her the truth and help her burn your shit"

Call ends.

He got the bed ready and put the movie on.

7h later.

I was asleep next to him. Bucky couldn't sleep tho.

Bucky mind:

Why would he do this?

She's funny and interesting

She gorgeous and hot

She is the sweetest person I've ever met and she makes amazing pasta

She's taken care off him like no one ever will

She loved him

She trusted him

What are you doing Steve? What happened to you?

When I woke up breakfast was ready and Bucky waiting for me in the kitchen with the biggest smile on his face

"Morning"

"Morning doll"

That's new. Pet names?

"What are your plans for today?"

"Actually my plans are yours too. I've spoken to Fury earlier and he wants us to start training the new recruits. Or. He wants you to make sure i dont go berserk and kill one."

"I'll go change ,call Steve and then I'm good to go."

"Steve?"

"Yeah he texted me to call him"

"He did huh?"

I nodded and went to my room.

"Let's see if you answer."

Part 3

[despair-to-future-arcs]

And of course the reason Junko was quiet during that time was because she was testing memory wiping on herself.

Yeah... pretty much Junko Enoshima was likely testing out her memory removal but I'm not sure how exactly, all that was known that Junko Enoshima was sick but there were rumors that Junko was spotted killing the Steering Committee members but there was no evidence...

Well... at least those assholes got what was coming but how long did anyone find out?

Sadly not, after the Steering Committee was killed - a new one was put in it's place and students that went missing were 'expelled' or were injured and thus the investigation was called off and any suspicions on Junko Enoshima was clear.

So she got away with it, so where did you learn this...

Well... it was actually on Chihiro's birthday when we were finish with Chiaki so a month and a few weeks ago when I learn this...

...

...

...

Date: March 14th, 2012

I can't believe, Chiaki is finally done! I really can't wait to test her out!

Seriously Nagi, thank you so much for helping me with this - I really do have to thank you for that.

No problem, honestly this was a lot of fun to get her voice and finally able to make her sound good.

You think Hifumi is going to have a field day with this one?

Knowing him, I wouldn't be surprise if he demands you to voice other characters. *As the duo were talking they got to Class 78 which Kyoko and Chisa were talking*

So the investigation is off...?

Indeed, after what had occur and everything; it seems myself and Masa Esumi were told to stop investigating further which I'm not sure what she's doing but I'm still unsure of a few things...

My father knows there's still a lot of unanswered questions but it's all I can do.

Well if you ask me, Kyoko. I do think your father did want to keep you and Masa Esumi safe so don't feel too discourage.

Oh and speaking of that, hello Chihiro! I see your out of your room at last; what have you been doing?

Hello Miss Yukizome, nothing much - just working on a problem solving program.

and I even got it completed on my birthday too so I'm pretty happy about it!

Well well, good job Chihiro! It seems you did really well so congrats!

And seeing as it's your birthday; why don't we celebrate?

Oooh, a birthday party?! That be awesome, thank you! *rushes into class*

So what's going on? I heard about the investigation and I remember giving my testimony, what happen?

Oh... right, you were one of those that witness the tragedy, didn't you?

Indeed she was and sadly, I don't think we can do much...

Hope's Peak Academy's new steering committee had decided to call off the investigation and certain students were expelled so there isn't much we can do...

... (Wait, they... they are closing it off?)

[hypaalicious]

I just got fired from my job today and like... im gonna be okay but god.. this wouldn't happen to Ignis

Getting fired does not feel good, and that really sucks 😩 I hope you aren’t taking it as a reflection of your self worth, because these jobs don’t give af about us, frfr. We’re just cogs in a machine.

Want me to tell you how I got fired from my job I gave 7 years to? Maybe it’ll make you feel better!

TL;DR: I mouthed off to an insufferable executive, she reported me to HR, and they fired me. But she got fired too shortly after 😂

Aiight, so boom:

Idk if folks remember but I worked at a casino and moved up from a basic customer service job to a supervisor of that department, then finally an office job with the executives. The group of us had a really nice relationship; pretty casual, went to lunch together, etc. Like, I would have called my boss my friend if I wasn’t very adamant of keeping lines drawn via work power balances.

But… we all got too comfortable with each other, and when it came down to it, I was the only one expendable.

One of the executives was… she wasn’t a good person, tbh. Lol she was very petty, very shallow, made things really hard for our creative team. She had been reported to HR multiple times for inappropriate comments but like outside of a slap on the wrist, she was untouchable because she was besties with the CEO.

Anyway, COVID hit, and shit got real. Most of us stayed in office to work. During lunch one day, this executive’s doctor called her and left a voicemail to get back to him immediately. We were all like ?? but figured she had it covered.

Then, she called out of work a few days later. And then a week passed and she still ain’t show up. They did a deep clean of the cafeteria that we were all at and roped it off.

So yeah, she came down with the rona. Which is ironic because when the pandemic first hit she scoffed at it and was like, “I’m just gonna live my life, ya know?” And I guess life said:

So yeah. Work wise, things went a lot smoother with her gone. I was more involved with the creative team and got shit done without ruffling their feathers. More people from other departments that this executive had pissed off in the past started coming around more. It was the golden age of productivity. LOL

Well, my boss also had her added on IG. And she was pissed cause while she was out with COVID, she’s posting herself going on walks with her dog, going to the gym (unmasked), doing yoga… basically living it up for the gram. We were pissed, lmao.

Anyway after a month and a half, she shows back up to the office. Nobody is really happy about it but oh well. I go into her office to say welcome back.

My pettycopter flew cause I opened my mouth and said, “hey Typhoid Mary, how’s it going?”

She laughed, I laughed, we chatted for awhile, I caught her up on the work we did for her while she was out, that was it. She left her office shortly after.

Well, later that day, my boss comes in my office shaking. I have never seen her that mad. I ask her what’s up, and she tells me “that bitch reported you to HR over a joke” and that I’m suspended until she can pull whatever strings she can to get me back in office. I just nod, pack up my immediate things and leave.

HR calls me in to talk to me about the insensitive things I said and how I violated HIPPA by exposing her medical history… to only her in her office apparently, but whatever.

A week passes and my boss calls me and said despite going all the way to the CEO and ripping assholes in the company president and everything, she can’t reverse the decision and I’m fired.

Should I have said that? Probably not. Do I regret it? Not really. LMFAO sure, I’ve been unemployed and very poor since then but like… I got to finish my book. I got started on my own otome. I reclaimed my life in a lot of ways. Yeah, it’s been stressful in some ways but I wasn’t gonna go anywhere in that job and I was being taken advantage of like whoa.

Also, the executive got fired after that cause her own shenanigans caught up with her. She used company funds for her own personal projects. LOL

I’m looking for another job rn but it’s a bad time to try to get back into the job force as we’re on the way to a recession LOL But still, no regrets!

I felt bad about it at first tho. I’ve never gotten fired before, lol. And it sucks to give 7 years of your life to a company who won’t even give you benefit of the doubt. But… everything happens for a reason, I guess. LOL

So anyway, I am sorry for your loss of income but I don’t think you’re less of a person because you got fired. Ima pray you find a better job with a bigger paycheck in the future!

[sun-like-dem-bones]

Does anyone else feel like they're scraping by on basically handouts?

I know many in the US can relate that we rely on staying on our parents insurance till the cutoff at 26. I even got away with using both mine (when I had any) and my parents insurance to save money at the eye doc. Being half blind is a hugely taken-for-granted cost in life. It's still expensive no matter who's your insurer. Someone tell me an insurance plan for free exams and glasses/contacts even EXISTS.

I am so. So willing to do things in other people's names. I started making appointments for massages in my mother's name as she has a bunch of credits rolling over that she can't use. I wouldn't be getting massages at all otherwise.

I use my sister's phone number at various department stores when I had to spend the whole day looking for an adult luxury type look for a first impression luncheon at my job. Since she is a credit card member to big store chains, they occasionally have good deals only for those customers. And I just give them a "hmm let's try this number". And like, they KNOW. They just ask "insert sister's name" and I say "yes that's it!"

Having nice clothes is something I can't afford after having been laid off for two months. Let alone putting together a "look" all in one shopping trip. Usually I can only afford to thrift my clothes, which is where any sort of quality clothes from the 1990s and 2000s has ended up anyway. Being able to dress myself and slowly build my closet for less than $50 a month? A doable expense. Furniture from homegoods or Walmart? Or target when there's a sale? It'll have to do. Even if it is lightweight crap that will barely survive one apartment move. At least it won't require strong-person(s) labor cost.

I'm sure people have been sharing phone numbers for retail points for much longer than the birth of streaming subscriptions. No one is a goody two shoe about sharing services and now for most things you can't. I wonder how those van lifers even do their own.

Having room on your credit card(s) just to pay rent while you're laid off is a huge save or I would lose everything and move to another state with my mom. Probably couldn't rent again for 7 years and I could let mom watch me struggle to even get out of her hair. Look mom the system you thrive(d) in makes it impossible for me to even be independent from you! So much for empty nesting! 😜

It is an eventuality I have to accept. I don't know how often layoffs happen in the past but both times had nothing to do with my quality of work in the short span of basically about 3-4 years of corporate work? If I get laid off again this year, the state government won't help me again. I will probably sink $10k more into debt in a matter of months. And not much less than that if I got laid off in any year after this one.

I look for remote/hybrid jobs because I subtract the cost of the salary/hourly pay with the gas it takes for rush hour in a major metropolitan area. My internship was a huge help to even get me where I am today... Two hour commute, twice a day. Laid off the minute my university decided they won't require internships due to the pandemic.

Oh my god and do you know how long I can put off car maintenance!? Thankfully it's nothing serious like a check engine light or constantly having to pour more oil into a car that just eats a quart like its maple syrup every week. But I do have an axle throwing grease from like 6 months ago. It's basically no bigger an issue than a toddler burping up their spit. My tires are 6 years old now from the previous owner and the guy said the sidewall cracking is basically very slow dry rot while I have plenty of tread left. I feel like a grandma who's going to eventually hand her car down to some very appreciative grandkids. Old but low mileage and well kept up with.

Having folks that did decent for their time can be a huge privilege. Some well-doing parents are assholes and don't help at all for sure. I got a used reliable car after graduating so I could drive downtown to college and work. And it's literally a luxury nowadays to have a car as reliable as that thing for that long and for what? No car payment and therefore minimal insurance cost. Throwing 115,000 miles on it in, I dunno, 3 years? (I don't know what was more mileage, delivering pizza or commuting 80mi to and from work and college for a couple semesters) Gotta blow $600 on a new radiator or alternator here or there? Eh. Couple hood smushes from fender benders? Pff. Nuthin'

Well. Except gas.

Your boomer parents could even call it a handout to let you stay with them at a discounted rate of rent these days. Even more so if it's free as long as you're working/in school.

I wouldn't have a degree without my family's help, because, hear me out.

The government wouldn't even loan me enough to cover the cost that I couldn't afford.

Between the maximum that they would loan me, and what I could come up with working full-time summers and part time during school, LiViNg at HoMe, would only cover 2/3rds of the price of my tuition.

Frankly having to do both school and work hurt my ability to do well in actually retaining the information, and having better grades. For difficult degrees like art, architecture and really any of the sciences, I barely passed when I didn't have to work that one year. And then we decided well, you scraped by with a D in one class so you will be behind a year to take things in order. It was already unaffordable at this 5 year trajectory plan. Come home and figure something else out.

It's insane to me that so much had to happen to even get me where I am and-

I just. I feel like, you're either struggling at rock bottom, or even if you have a 401k started, some level of ability to see a doctor, like, if you're really sick bad, free coping mechanisms like massages and occasional therapy sessions, you're still barely scraping and often your needs can't be met, and rarely any wants.

I still can only afford the cheapest gym, veterinarian, sometimes even diy mechanic. The things I do have built up such as clothes, jewelry, purses, pots for some plants- they only exist from birthday gifts, dead relatives, or the time of my youth before I knew I was supposed to save my good-grade money just to have extra I dunno $3000 laying around for a month without a job??

I may have decent funds now to afford the housing cost that basically eats people, wallets, and sanity, as if it were the blue pacman eating dollars around the board and rather turning our souls INTO ghosts, but I certainly don't have enough TIME.

Like. How does anyone move up in life without free or cheap handouts?

And to think that I make the amount that my folks made individually. Which together raised 2.5 kids on, lived in a house (which was bought on 1 income), and had 2 cars and 2 dogs?

I just have me and two cats and we can't even afford van-life. Let alone an apartment by ourselves. We'd have a hurricane, a fender bender or major maintenance, a feline dental cleaning before his teeth fall out, every couple months something happens.

I don't think the middle class used to rely on handouts.

Aw crap when was the last time I saw the dentist.

[rrkittenzz]

𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐡𝐮𝐬𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐟𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 (𝟐/𝟐)

── genre: hurt/comfort

★ read the previous part here!

I erased that idea away from my mind. What in the world was that? I thought as I held my wife tight. I stayed silent as she held me back. “Darling, it's alright,” she soothed. “I've been wanting to have another, too. You know, I don't want our son to be alone all the time.”

I nodded as I closed my eyes. Maybe I was selfish. I knew she always wanted to have a lot of children, for like probably two or three. It's me, I'm the one holding her back, just because I was traumatized by seeing her give birth.

I felt like I'm an asshole. I actually thought of getting rid of the baby, where I was the one who did all of it. It all was my deed, and still, I kept thinking the baby was the one who might kill my wife, but it was me! That also means she nearly died five years ago because of me, not my son.

Really, is this our marriage test? No, more like a me problem. Where I had to choose my unborn child or my wife, and where I actually don't have the audacity to do so. I had to choose because of something I, myself did. Even I was bold enough to have a horrible thought of begging my wife not to keep the baby.

“I'm sorry,” I murmured miserably, to which she immediately replied as she pulled herself off the embrace. “No, what are you apologizing about?” She scooped my face around her palms, knowing what's going on here. “Darling, you are an amazing father.”

“I'm not. I'm not even a good husband for you,” I said sorely. She gave me a heavily concerned look. “Darling... what is it?” I shook my head slowly. She would never forgive me if she knew I was about to ask her for an abortion. “Also... I kept acting dramatic where you're the one who will actually experience it all,” I added, which enlightened her smile.

“Oh, my husband, that means you deeply cared about me!” “Poor dad, it must've been awful to witness it, doesn't it? I already forgot it all, though, even I forgot all the 20 hours of labor pains!”

She sighed in her smile. “But, Darling, I remember that you were the one that comforted me all the time. You were there right next to me, soothing, and kept telling me that I did a great job. You kept offering me water because you knew I kept getting thirsty. You held me gently when tears rolled down my face. It was you, Dear.”

“Maybe, right now you're thinking of how a bad husband and father you are, but in fact, I wouldn't be able to bring our son to this world if you weren't there that time!”

My orbs widened a little as she told me that. “Darling, I have always felt safe whenever I'm with you. That time, I felt like I didn't need to worry about anything, that you were smiling by my side, encouraging me. I knew our newborn son must've thought of how cool his dad was!”

I smiled a little. “Really? Is that really what you thought of?” I asked. “Of course!” she replied and pulled me for another hug. “One thing is that you know me, I know you,” she began soothingly.

I tightened the embrace as I knew she could read the horrible thoughts I had in my mind. “I'm so sorry, Sweetheart.” “No, don't be. I totally understand you, alright?” she replied with a warm smile, stroking my back. Then, she broke off the hug.

“But, look, I'm just fine now. I'm here, with you,” she said. “Everything is going to be alright.” She put her hand on my face gently and kissed my right cheek. “You're the best husband and father ever, don't you know that? I love you so much.”

I smiled in relief. Yes, everything is going to be alright. I took a kiss on her lips. “I love you more.”

[the-firebird69]

Rage Against The Machine - The Ghost of Tom Joad (Official HD Video)

With the max are saying is Hera and I have created things that will come back and destroy us and put us into a state of being like in The grapes of wrath and I'm already there and they are saying it and trying to prove they're in control and it doesn't prove it to me it proves they're fighting over it and I don't think the other aware of that 100% now and it means my grapes or gonads and we used for it whether of the mind or body and people find out that it was both later and can't figure it out but it is that complicated but a lot of people figured it's JC and Mary and they want you to tribute it to me so the figure here got it and he knows what's going on I think it's a clone and they started to work and they have some bases near camera and others and they know what the empire is up to they're getting their asses handed to them in a big way and they're having everybody else I hope do it to them and the empire is on top of it and they plan on roasting the people in the ship and there's analogy and code everywhere for it but what they're really basically saying is it's going to come back and haunt us she and I and we will be in a state just like the Midwest and they caused that to happen by not properly protecting the fields and they inspired it and forced it to happen and it didn't again they're saying they did it again they're saying this time they say the land will lay Baron because the ship has to come out and hours to be forced out which is what they believe is happening

Zues Hera

All this is very true and I was going to say it but he's right there living it I'm happy for it but I'll say this they didn't miss much of it in these idiot Max I missing the fact that we didn't miss it either and boy are they up in our face saying we missed it and he's right here supposedly not knowing anything seeing it out loud and you Max and very arrogant and this shows it and people are figuring out why. It's well founded you should be but not to everybody constantly your work is wasted and it's starting to show your face is a craggly and you're not eating well you're getting repressed and kidnapped and questioned and killed. That's the price for talking and you people talked at all the way here on purpose to tell him that you are having him do it and it's to your own detriment and loss and he could care less he helped having to do it. And so did we. You're just losers like your little cousins here and holy s*** are they stupid. But you wanted a war and now you've got one and you're complaining like we're going to help you like where your mama or weird Daddy and we're not and give it a rest you stupid assholes you wake up and you start annoying us with that s*** or the other stuff as both the same we go after you you think you have unlimited people and you're wrong. And those mega computers have been down there doing your job not even allow you to access your fools

Thor Freya

I have to tell you something he did it on purpose but we had him do it and he says it every time we should stop saying it we did have them do it both of them and others and it turns out it was not a great idea it seems that the clans have taken off with it and yeah they're pulverizing everybody the clothes near and if you go in there it fuels up the monster which fuels up the ship this is terrible. And you getting rid of yourselves more luck and for Christ's sake you can't figure it out I see how stupid you are in the comments are starting now it's really the max and they don't have proof it's not and we have a huge huge ego and a big mouth and it's really us they have to find out if we took over cuz we're acting like we did we had this happen to him we're grabbing them I'll see what this point is he wouldn't be able to tell either so probably go down with this stuff and he doesn't feel bad at all and he knows it's a big hill or mountain to climb I wish I had to figure out something she's not a child at all and I'm wrong he's got a three year old child for his body his brain is 55 years old I keep putting it on this child and we're getting our asses kicked. And yeah we might do a little stupid we don't think it is coming we can put it on him after thinking nothing of him and we get crushed we have to stop doing it but these idiots are inspiring and they're getting toasted I mean obliterateda

Macs

And we are racing to the hole and it's disgusting because a lot of dumb talk like that it's gross we don't know what to do about it there's no way to overpower it or to calm it down and just will get worse he says you're fighting a creature damn thing could be 10,000 Miles high some people say 5000 so practically nothing we do will do anything it's like a ship and we know it can go in there with certain ships we think and it has to be cadmium laced heavily so I do understand what you're saying

Woody

He's right and his people will all walk around say we have a woody now

Zues

Haha I'd like to say that with him that's for damn sure everybody say the other people how's your woody now

Hera

So he asks the ubiquitous question, how's your... whole

..... family

Hera

Olympus

[mlynar-nearl]

this is very long i am apologies

yes !!! i read ur essay (?) on mlynars grief too and i just think that youve got it down super neat (ive probably repeated this too many times) so like good job !!!

ah indeed i was the anon who asked abt his kit last time too (saw the art of him too btw its very pretty, very nice ur friend did an amazing job!) so do you think hed have a talent like aosta's in that he does extra (maybe % or maybe fixed) dmg to unblocked? or hes got like a skill thats like fartooth (global only target blocked but in his case its global only target unblocked?) i think either ways adding a different debuff to all of his skills would be fun ! do you think hed be rng based cc (like aak?) or like its specifically one debuff to each skill, those kinda stuff? honestly er this is a lot of questions you can selectively answer but i just think hes probably a neat wraith killer lol no more annoying unblocked assholes running around ehe but also on a separate note, do you think he has any special interactions with other operators (excl the ones from laterano) ? his hobbies etc (just go wild man, tell me wtv even his preferred breakfast or whether he hates grass or smth) also yes ty for the advice abt mandragora !! i only figured it out like... once i accidentally made her drop blocks on herself and she died due to low hp and i was like wtf cos ??? free elimination ? and i learnt i was very wrong later on but pozy saved my ass aha so it all worked out anyways ! just training for when i actually bother clearing ch 9 ig oh and until u said it i didnt rly notice that sss like... hates all snipers. (ive tried using chalter it didnt go well... pozy as well) like all the late stage sss stages just completely dont let you use snipers for anything other than like buffs (unless youre rosa ig might have chance) shit i screwed up this is even longer than last time im so sorry if this is uncomfortable to read :sob: if this is too uh ew to converse with i can chacha slide into ur dms (but give me time i am... well theres a reason im anon) but yeah anyways have a nice day so sorry for this length and as always u can selectively answer or ignore lol ! hope ur well !

don't worry about the length, i love answering questions! I will try and get to everything. thank you for the compliments ab my post i try (oh my god do i try) :]

i think his talents would involve extra damage + prio unblocked enemies + his source of crowd control. his CC would be strictly bind, not RNG like aak, because his arts are specifically grappling hook/rope shit. i think i've been theoretically calling this talent and arts type "tethering." in lore he mainly uses it for traversal, but there's no reason it wouldn't work on people, too, so i think it fits best as a crowd control bind. one of his skills would then just do a "talent trigger increase" as part of their functionality meaning extra bind chance. of course, how useful he would actually be as a concept depends on the numbers, which is the part i'm bad at, but still, fun to think about :]

for other operators, he would definitely get on well enough with some of the cooks among the RI operators, for one. his favorite flavor of sweet thing is cinnamon, and cinnamon is easy to incorporate into things, and he's smart enough to be polite to the people feeding his interests. he would also, i think, have interesting but awkward interactions with the iberians, because while he is not himself iberian, he has traveled extensively there and shares memories of the profound silence/aftermath thereof with Andoain. ultimately, i think he's polite to most everyone he runs into if he were to go to RI, but he's already rather closed off as a person and you have to open him up with a crowbar, so i don't know if anyone could be considered a friend of his. i don't even think fiammetta is really a friend of his (he would call it that, but that's far from correct), more that they have similar enough feelings on a specific topic that leads them to cooperate. i think even increasing trust with him still leaves a lot under the surface.

other shealtiel facts...he prefers cats to dogs but understands the appeal of both, but his favorite animals are birds. being a sniper, he sees a lot of them, and spends a lot of time in places birds nest. i imagine lateran schools have a class on religion similar to catholic school (where i have unfortunately been), and that was his favorite subject because his mother was a canonist and spent most of her time analyzing the scriptures and teachings of lateran. he's surprisingly flexible because of this- he actually idealogically overlaps with andoain more than he'd like to admit, he just hates the man's methods. and life choices. when he's on the road he survives off of breakfast bars and terran poptarts. he prefers chilly weather to heat, but hates heavy snow. he has a halfway decent singing voice but never uses it outside of when he's free enough to attend a lateran service. his plan for immediately after achieving his goal (killing andoain with fia) is to take a vacation somewhere cold-but-not-too-cold and isolated and not answer his messages for six to seven months. he's still on the fence about where, though. he would do that right now if he didn't have duties to fulfill. his favorite mixed drink is a gingerbread gin and tonic (g&t + baking spice infused amaretto.) his favorite non-alcoholic drink is cranberry juice. he's become partial to a dying brand of iberian cookies because andoain likes them and he's started buying them up ahead of him out of a petty sort of spite.

SSS really does hate snipers which sucks b/c i do love me a sniperknights. chalter doesn't fall off quite as bad as some because she's useful for bosses but it's still Bad. i still bring snipers for the aspd buffs, but most of them just arent gonna hold up too much. sad :( gj with mandra! she's annoying but at least in her actual boss levels that aren't TFN you get the automatic pillar destroyers. good luck on chapter 9 when you get there :]

[chrisevansjellybeans]

I Love You, You Idiot | Bucky Barnes

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Here I am, once again writing in my favorite "we're best friends but we won't say we're in love" trope. Someone stop me.

A/N: This does not fall into the TFAWTS timeline!

Warnings: swearing, fluff, angsty-ish

*not my gif*

The bass rumbled through your entire body as you tried to listen to whatever story Sam was telling to the group. You tried with everything in you to listen but the mixture of the loud music of the club and your best friend's hand just casually laying on your exposed thigh was making it very difficult. You noticed the group laugh so you let out a small chuckle but if anyone asked you would not be able to say what was so funny.

“You okay, doll?” You glanced up at Bucky, who’s blue eyes were squinted with concern. His thumb slowly rubbing circles on the spot on your inner thigh where it was rested. “You look a little out of it. Do you need me to take you home?”

Say words, Y/N. You told yourself. But forming sentences was getting harder and harder with each circular pass the pad of his thumb made.

“Uh.”

Good job. Very articulate.

You didn’t want to be that person. The person who falls in love with her super hot best friend, but doesn’t say anything because they don’t want to “ruin the friendship” and then ends up sad and alone because said best friend doesn’t realize the feelings and moves on to someone else. And yet here you were. Being that cliche.

“Guys, I think I’m going to take Y/N home.” You heard Bucky say. Snapping out of whatever trance you were in you shifted away from him so his hand was no longer on your leg.

“No, I’m fine.” You stood up, strong and steady. “See? I was just thinking about some work stuff. But I’m gonna go grab another drink. Anyone want anything?”

The group shook their head and you made your way to the bar, happy to be away for a couple minutes.

Your moment of solace lasted only a few seconds though because you felt Bucky’s presence behind you. He trapped you in by placing his arms on either side of you, his chin landing on your shoulder.

“Wanna take shots?” Bucky’s voice rumbled in your ear. You really hoped he couldn’t feel the goosebumps that arose all over your skin. His breath smelled like a mix of spearmint and whiskey. A scent that if it came from any other man you would have probably been repulsed but on Bucky it was just comforting.

“Only if they’re tequila.” You turned around so you were face to face with him. Bucky gave you a cheeky smile as he waved the bartender over, ordering two shots each and then your regular drink order. As the bartender got your drinks ready, Bucky leaned down on his arms so he was even closer, your faces barely an inch apart.

“You’re my best friend, you know that?” Bucky smiled, pressing a slight kiss to your cheek.

“You’re mine too.” You whispered but you knew he heard you. Thank god for that super soldier hearing. Bucky stood back up and you could tell that he was on high alert, making sure that no one bumped into you or was making a beeline in the direction you guys were in.

You turned back around and placed your arms on the bar and leaned against it, your breasts pushing up slightly causing the guy next to you to take notice.

“Hey,” you glanced over as the guy next to you turned his body to fully face you. “You are the most beautiful woman at this bar.” You were amazed at how bold this guy was being. Bucky was still behind you, his arms still on either side of you. To anyone who didn’t know the two of you, it would be safe to assume that you were a couple.

“Thank you, that’s very sweet of you.” You smiled at him and leaned against Bucky’s arm a bit, to hopefully give that couple illusion even more.

Bucky was watching the interaction carefully, not yet ready to intervene but there if he needed to. You noticed his vibranium hand flex on the bar as the guy continued to flirt with you, that small action causing butterflies to erupt in your stomach.

“You wanna get out of here, pretty girl?” The guy leaned in even closer to you, officially popping the imaginary bubble you had around you. That was enough for you and for Bucky.

“Alright buddy, ease up.” Bucky pushed a hand against the guy's chest, moving him away from you. “She’s with me.”

“Relax, big guy. Why don’t you let this little mama speak for herself.” The guy stood up from his chair, he was Bucky’s height but you, Bucky and the guy knew that if it came down to it Bucky would kick his ass.

“This little mama doesn’t want to go home with you.” You said sternly. As you finished speaking, the bartender placed the shots and the drinks in front you.

“Bitch.” The guy mumbled, shaking his head and making his way around Bucky.

“What the fuck did you just say?” Bucky grabbed the guy by the front of his shirt. His eyes blazing as he glared down at the asshole. With each second that passed you could tell his hands were tightening around the guy’s shirt.

“I called your little slut girlfriend a bitch.” He spat out. “Maybe control your woman from flirting with other men at-”

Before he could finish, Bucky slammed his fist into his face. You let out a scream as the guy fell to the ground. Everyone’s eyes now focused on the three of you. Bucky reached down and grabbed him, pulling him back up. You had to look away as blood started to pour out of his nose and down his face. It looked like Bucky was about to punch him again but you quickly put your hand on his arm. Bucky looked over at you, his chest heaving, his metal arm shifting under the stress of his grip.

“Bucky, please. It’s not worth it. Look.” You glanced at the crowd that started to form, phones out and recording.

You could see the headlines now: Winter Soldier Bar Brawl: Is he still unhinged?

You spotted Sam making his way over, his face full of concern. Turning back to Bucky you squeezed his bicep. “Please. Let’s go.”

“Buck.” Sam made it over to you. “Go, I’ll take care of it.”

Bucky heaved as he pushed the guy away from him and then grabbed your hand. He quickly threw down a crumpled hundred dollar bill on the bar and didn’t wait for the change as he pulled you through the crowd of recording phones and out of the club.

He quietly pulled you down the street until you guys ended up at least four blocks away from the club.

“I should have killed that guy.” He huffed as he stuffed his hands into his pockets. Immediately he winced and pulled his flesh hand out. You hadn’t noticed before but his hand was definitely red and swelling. “Fuck.”

“Oh my god, Bucky,” You sighed as you gently took his hand in yours, turning it over and inspecting any damage. It didn’t look fractured but it was definitely sprained and going to be sore for a while. “You could have broken your hand, you fucking idiot.”

“It will heal in a couple hours. And you’re welcome.” Bucky scowled in your direction. “Next time, I’ll just let him shit talk you all night.”

“I didn’t ask you to do that. If you would have waited another twenty seconds we would have gotten our drinks and probably wouldn't have seen that man again.” You glared. “Instead you had to turn into a cave man and beat on your chest and prove your dominance.” You tried to sound tough but your voice was shaking given how cold you were. You had left your jacket back in the club.

“I wasn’t proving shit, Y/N.” Bucky snapped as he pulled his hand out of yours, sliding his leather jacket off and putting it around your shoulders in a huff. “Maybe it infuriates me to hear someone talk about you like that.”

“Well it’s not all cake and ice cream for me, but you don’t see me throwing god damn punches.” You sighed as you wrapped the jacket tighter around your body. “This is going to be everywhere tomorrow.”

“Who gives a fuck.” Bucky muttered.

“You should!” You fumed. “It’s not a great look to have you out here punching random guys at bars, Bucky. Especially over nothing that important.”

“Stop talking like that. God, it’s like you are the only fucking person who doesn’t see how goddamn special and important you are.” Bucky hissed as his hand continued to throb. “So please just..stop talking.”

You snapped your mouth shut as you shot daggers at Bucky which he gladly returned. You turned away from him, calling a car to take you back to his place. You both waited in silence, Bucky only making the occasional foul exclamation whenever his hand hurt. Finally for what seemed hours the car finally pulled up. Bucky, always the gentleman even when angry, held the door open for you as you slid in closing it gently but not making any moves to get in the car. You looked up at him through the window confused but he only shook his head and tapped the car, signally for the driver to leave.

“Can you please wait.” You turned to the driver who let out an annoyed huff.

“Five minutes lady. It’s almost bar time.”

Quickly you opened the door not stepping completely outside, the air having an unforgiving bite to it now.

“Get in the fucking car, Bucky.”

“You go, you have a key. I just need some time.”

“You can take some time in your apartment. Just get in the car.” You retorted.

“I’m not getting in that car.”

“James, I swear to god.” You were fully out of the car now. You slammed the door shut causing the driver to cast an annoyed look your way. “What is your problem? We argue all the time, it’s not that serious.”

“It’s not about the argument,” he grumbled. “It’s about the fact that you are so completely oblivious to how fucking perfect you are and how it wasn’t just that guy that was staring at you but every other guy in that bar. And how angry it makes me that I just want to go up to every single of one of them and tell them to put their dicks away because you’re mine and only mine.”

Your breath hitched as you processed his words.

“And I’m doing everything in power to not just shake you until you realize that I love you, and not just as my friend.”

“I-”

“I can’t believe I just told you that.” Bucky shook his head and let out a humorless chuckle. “Get in the car, Y/N. I’ll see you later.”

Bucky turned and started walking down the street.

“James Buchanan Barnes!” You yelled after him. “If you don’t think that I love you back, then you really are a bigger idiot than I thought.” Bucky stopped in his tracks.

“What did you just say?” He asked as he faced you again. He stayed where he was but you could see the tension start to leave his body.

“I said,” You smiled as you let out a long breath. “That I love you, you idiot.”

Before you knew it, Bucky was over to you and he had you scooped up in his arms. His mouth moved feverishly against yours, every emotion that the two of you had for each other pouring out in this one kiss. Your hands found their way up his chest and around his neck. He let out a low moan that sent vibrations through your whole body.

“Alright, lady, I’m leaving.” You both ignored the driver as he waved you off and pulled out and down the street. But you couldn’t care less because you were finally in the arms of your best friend.

“Say it again.” Bucky whispered against your lips.

“I love you, you idiot.”