#also here's hoping tumblr doesn't screw up the ask again

[yourwildsimp]

blood stains and butterflies

includes: Soap, Ghost warnings: PTSD, panic attack, vomiting, gore length: 4,000 some words summary: Ghost isn't all too happy that Christmas showed up months early. A/N: uh... Boo. I'm alive! Anyways, new obsession time. Also, ik tumblr goes crazy with bots but where did they all swarm me from?? Enjoy though, and please give me feedback.

Ghost stumbles, nearly slipping in the pummeling rain. His gloved hand hardly catches traction on the slick side of their stupid fucking safe house that's spat up 30 miles past bum fuck nowhere.

The sky is as dark as the field that surrounds him, clouds hiding the moon away like it's something shameful.

I'm shameful, Ghost's brain spits as he gasps as quietly as he can. He can feel his throat closing up tight- too tight- tighter than anything he can handle.

Oh sure, because waterboarding and gasoline is nothing compared to stupid, god awful-

"Creepin' Jesus, L.t.-"

Ghost hardly has the wherewithal to yank his mask just over the bridge of his crooked, fucked up nose before he's spilling what little bit of lunch he ate before they were sent on this lousy mission.

"Ghost, what's goin' oan? Ye alright?"

Shut up. Shut the hell up. Shut up, shut up, shut up.

He's dry heaving so much that something is stinging somewhere deep behind his eyes.

A hand, steady yet uncertain, touches his shoulder and Ghost feels flames licking at his skin, even through the ever persistent rain storm.

"Don't fucking touch me," he seethes, baring his teeth like a rabid animal, feet clumsily scrambling further away, leaving his arms to weakly try to compensate. The last thing he needs is to bust his ass on his own throw up.

Soap jerks his hand away like he is the one being burned. The rain is so loud, but not even shelling could drown out the sound of Soap's breath catching in his throat.

"I'm fine," Ghost rasps, sounding impossibly fragile even to his own ringing ears. "Go back inside before you get yourself sick, Soap."

"Sick like ye?"

Ghost is gagging on bile before he can spit fire back. Instead, he spits up the last of his pathetic lunch.

"I said I'm fine. They're just-" Christ, he's shaking so hard he might slip again- "fucking Christmas lights. Nothing's wrong with me."

If Ghost would stop being a little bitch for a second, he'd see the way Soap's eyebrows furrow in genuine confusion with a single blink.

"This is aboot th' holiday decor?" Soap asks desperately. Ghost can hear a puddle splash as Soap inches closer.

Ghost would rather be buried alive again than admit that he is having a breakdown over some lights speckled with blood. Hell, he'd rather gulp down gasoline than speak anything ever again.

Ghost screws his eyes shut in hopes of- of what? Hiding? He's such a shameless coward.

"L.t. please. What's goin' oan? I don't understand- what's wrong with th' lights?"

The door was kicked open, windows smashed in, and they were dead long before he jerked his car in park.

He wanted- needed- them to be alive so badly, so desperately, he skimmed over the fact that more of Joseph's brains were on the wall than in his skull for fuck's sake-

He's retching again, but tears are making his vision too blurry to see what he's hurling onto the muddied clump of grass beneath his feet. Rain, actually. The rain is making his vision blurry.

"Come back inside 'fore ye hurt yerself more. Please, Ghost." There is a noticeable hesitation and Ghost hopes Soap will just go back inside and leave him in shambles.

Soap doesn't go anywhere, but Ghost crumbles anyway from what he says.

"Ye're scarin' me…"

"You're scaring me! Tommy, stop it! Please- please stop!"

Tommy sneered behind the cracked skull mask, and Simon felt his lower bunk dip with his brother's weight. The pillow under his head was snatched from him.

"Don't ever beg anyone for anything, Simon. Hasn't dad taught you that?" The sneer bled into a sickening grin. "Here, let's practice."

His pillow was shoved over his face before he could even choke out the word 'no'.

Ghost loses his footing and falls to his knees, hands weakly grasping for any leverage on the side of the safe house. There isn't any. His left knee digs into the mud as he stumbles.

Soap, the persistent, heaven-sent bastard, is by his side before Ghost slips any further.

"I don't-" Soap hovers by Ghost like a lost dog, buzzing with confusion and concern. "A'll take it doon, Lt. A'll get rid of it all."

Ghost vaguely hears Soap's footsteps trailing off, the pummeling of the rain and the rushing in his ears nearly drowning it out. But then Soap stops and the footsteps rush back his way. Ghost shudders in the rain, in his thoughts, fingers weakly dragging against the dirt as he presses his back against the side of the shelter. Soap is so quiet that Ghost can almost pretend he isn't there.

But, fuck, he is. Standing right there, thinking God knows what, and Ghost's mask is still above his scarred, vomit-laced mouth-

Ghost drags his soaked sleeve over his mouth and chin so rough he feels a strap jerk against a scar. He grits his teeth and bares it and yanks his mask back over the rest of his face.

"Give me yer knives."

Ghost startles- fucking jumps out of his skin. He thought Soap was gone. Scratch that- he hoped Soap was gone.

Ghost slaps together the meanest glare he can muster. He's pathetic like this; a mess in the mud, his own vomit washing away in the rain next to him, being waterboarded by his mask.

Soap doesn't even flinch. Hell, he reaches his hand out, expectant.

"Ye might…" Soap takes a breath, his fingers curling into his palm just a little. "I don't want to come back oot 'ere to find that ye did something stupid to yerself."

"You think-" Ghost has to take a short breath, his voice shredded and raw and so god damn fragile. "You think that I'm-"

"I don't know what t' think," Soap rushes, sounding as desperate as Ghost hates to feel. "Just promise me ye won't."

Ghost screws his eyes shut, wondering if a promise like this only counts for the moment, or if he has to keep it for the rest of his miserable life.

"Am beggin' ye, Ghost."

"Did you beg them, Tommy? Did you?" Simon heard himself say as he stared at his brother's limp body dangling in a bloody mess of Christmas lights from the rafters. Fitting it was, that he suffocated. "Or did not have the chance to?"

"Simon-"

"Don't you- Don't fucking call me that," Ghost rasps.

Soap opens his mouth, desperate as a drowned man gasping for air, but Ghost beats him to it.

"I won't, fuck. I'm not bloody insane." Although he sure as hell felt that way.

Soap's jaw tightens, teeth clenching against each other as he draws his hand back. He is still hesitant to leave Ghost alone; alone with his thoughts and feelings. And knives.

"I won't," Ghost breathes quietly, Adam's apple bobbing as he gathers what little pieces of him were left. "I wouldn't, Soap."

Soap nods, gaze lingering as he turns his body away towards the shelter. "A'll kill ye, if ye do."

Ghost chuckles, heartless and hurt and so pitifully wrapped in his head. What a perfect way to go, that would be. That's the only way he can see himself dying, being taken out by Soap. Ghost wonders how he would do it.

Soap hasn't moved.

"I promise, Johnny."

That seems to do the trick because seconds later, Soap is taking off through the rain and heading inside the house.

Ghost is, blessedly, devastatingly, alone. But he's left with his thoughts. And they begin to wander before he beats them down.

The whole fucking shelter is done up with Christmas decorations, and it makes him wonder how many layers of dust are on every light and ornament. It makes him wonder what happened to the people who strung them up.

He doesn't wonder, however, how the blood splatters got there.

It's not even near the holiday season, either, which really pisses him off because it's just his luck. He thought he'd be safe from his holiday horrors, months away from Christmas. Of course the world slams a curveball right in his face and spits on him while he's down.

He doesn't notice that his hands are gripping at the top of his mask. They would be tugging on his hair, but he's a spineless, faceless coward. No wonder everyone thought Tom was the better brother. They were fucking right to, weren't they?

Christ, they're all he can see. Tom, hanging from the rafters by the Christmas tree lights, his throat a mangled mess. Beth, a crumpled mop of blinding white ribs and heavy dark blood, her Santa hat mostly red and somewhere underneath what was left of her. His mom, stabbed in the neck, blood soaking into her newest ugly sweater she was so proud of. Joseph's head and reindeer antlers headband was blown off with a bullet, his blood and brains and matter covering the various paint splotches on the wall where Tom and Beth couldn't decide on a new color.

Joseph's toy airplane kicked to the side, forgotten white wings stained with pieces of the boy.

He wanted to be a pilot when he grew up, Joseph did. He used to make Simon hold him above his head so he could stick his little arms out real far like they were wings on a plane. Simon would carry him all around the house; pretended to be the panicked control tower, telling pilot Joseph that he couldn't use the runway- the hallway- because there were fallen trees- a broom and a mop- blocking his path. Pilot Joseph was always a quick thinker, and he would land his plane further down the way, on an empty back road- the couch. And Simon would toss his beaming nephew on the ratty old brown couch and listen to his giggles as he shouted, "Again, Uncle Simon! Again!"

God, the pure joy on the kids face whenever Simon bought him that little toy plane for Christmas one year was burning at the back of his brain. Fucks sake, all Simon could afford at the time was a little figurine. It wasn't remote controlled, no doors could open- hell, the propeller couldn't even spin. But Joseph loved it more than anything in the world.

The sound of glass shattering behind the shelter has Ghost choking on his breath.

Simon would've killed to have been deaf when he took Tom down from the rafters. Glass shattered, body thumped, glass shattered, glass shattered, glass-

Bile scorches the back of his throat as his memory supplies the imagine of blood splattered Christmas ornaments. He tumbles forwards onto his hands and knees, frantically tugging his mask above his lips again. One hand claws at the dirt, the other, supported by his elbow in the mud, holding the bottom part of his mask out of the way as he retches and dry heaves until he swears he could be spitting up blood.

Ghost curls in on himself and falls to his side, a deflated, crumpled heap of shame.

It's all his fault. It is. If he had gotten there sooner, if he had seen it all coming, if he had never gotten compromised, if he had never joined the fucking military- none of it would have happend. It's his fault, all his fault.

"My fault," he heaves, blurry eyes boring into where the dark, starless sky seamlessly bleeds into the black, rocky mud. He's drowning in the stifling nothingness.

Tom could be coming home from work, kissing Beth hello, playing 'pilot' with Joseph. But he's not. He's a rotted corpse six-feet under the dirt. That's how Simon should be. It's his fault that it didn't turn out that way. His fault, all his fault.

"I'm sorry," he breaks, shaking his head, bringing his muddy glove to his face, pressing the heel of his palm into his forehead. The other half hides, burying into the ground, like he could dig his own grave like this.

Joseph would've been in high school by now, driving and going to meet friends. But he's not. He's stuck in a wooden box next to his parents. That's how Simon should be. It's his fault-

"Please-"

"Ghost?"

Ghost's eye snap open, body tense and frozen. He vaguely notices that he's hyperventilating. Christ alive, he's breathing so fast but he can't get any air. He can't breathe, no matter how hard he tries. He might as well be buried alive again-

"…-ost, look at me. I need ye to look at me Lt."

Ghost's blood shot eyes snap in Soap's direction- when was he sat up against the shack's wall?- and his breath hitches somewhere deep in his throat before he feels his heart pitter faster. It's trying to break out of his ribcage, slamming into his cracking bones, threatening to bleed openly into Soap's hands. Soap has such nice hands. He'd hate to soil them.

"Where are we reit now?' Soap asks, carefully crouching in front of him, both hands resting open palm facing up on his knees.

Ghost feels his eyebrows furrow at that one. Has Soap forgotten? Your location seems like an awfully important thing to know.

"Ghost, I need ye to tell me where we are," Soap insists, the tendons in his neck pulled so taunt. Ghost worries. He worries that Soap will hurt his neck, straining how he is.

"Manchester?" he murmurs so low that he can feel how his vocal cords vibrate with it. Soap's neck pulls over his Adam's apple as it bobs rough. Ghost wonders what it would take to snap the stretched tendons there. Ghost thinks he'll kill anything that dares to graze them.

"Nae. Nae, Ghost. Look around. Look around ye an' then tell me where we are."

Ghost's eyes carefully draw away from Soap's vulnerable, tense throat, and move to meet his gaze. Soap is scared, he realizes slowly, the thought dawning on him as slow as the sun rises. Ghost furrows his eyebrows, a frown tugs his lips down at the side. Hesitantly, his eyes drift to the trees surrounding him. He can hardly pick up anything distinctive through the rain, but he feels his eyes widen.

"We're at a safe house. But- but then I-"

"That's reit, Ghost. We're on a mission waitin' for exfil. Do ye remember what our mission was?" Soap speaks like a kindergarten teacher. One who wears long, gray skirts and a yellow button-up blouse, has the thinnest heels on her black shoes, and always has her hair done up in a relaxed bun. Ghost vaguely remembers hating his kindergarten classes; he could never focus. Ghost thinks he would hang on every word if Soap was his teacher. "Stay with me, Ghost," Mr. Soap snaps his fingers once or twice, the sound dancing away through the rain.

"Gather intel on the terrorists' bio-weapons… Destroy the sample. Get out with no one the wiser." Ghost holds his breath for praise, for Soap to tell him he's right. Tell him thats he's not a fuck up, not weak or stupid or not masculine enough. To tell him that maybe, he deserved everything that happened to him

"Yeah, that's right. There ye go, Ghost." Soap's lips twist into a pitiful, beautiful thin-lipped smile. "Thought I lost ye for good there, L.T."

"Never," Ghost rasps before he can shut his big fat mouth.

Soaps lips quirk up more at that, and Ghost has half the mind to get on his knees and ask for repentance. Acceptance, even.

"Are ye alright to come inside?" Soap asks carefully, words treading carefully like Ghost was a minefield.

Sometimes he feels that way, if he were ever honest with himself. He feels like a wired ticking time bomb, bound to explode at the smallest of missteps.

Well, Soap just happens to be a demolition expert, doesn't he?

"Ghost? Did ye hear me?"

Ghost feels himself blink, and when he opens his eyes, he can only look at Soap's lips.

It's unfair, really, how it all slams into him at once, after everything.

He thinks about it. He thinks about it so vividly that he can almost feeling his rough lips against Soap's, feel his clean shaven jaw rub against Soap's stubble.

He takes a shuddering breath when the thought of betrayal and blood and Christmas lights flood his mind.

He doesn't deserve that. He doesn't deserve Soap's lips or stubble or- hell- his being. He isn't good enough.

Besides, it'll only get Soap killed faster. More brutal. They'd make Ghost watch, too. He couldn't shoulder that.

Ghost startles slightly when Soap's gloved hand waves in front of his eyes once or twice.

"Don't get in yer heid. Stay with me, L.T."

Ghost feels his lips tremble. Soap always knows his tells.

" 'm sorry, Johnny," Simon murmurs, blinking against the shine in Soap's eyes.

Soap softens at that, concerned frown morphing into a lopsided grin that doesn't quite reach his eyes.

"No need to apologize, Ghost. Ain't yer fault," Soap hums.

Ghost grunts at that, and if it was in acceptance or disagreement, Soap could only hope to flip a coin.

Soap takes off one of his gloves, his pale skin free from the inky, filthy glove. He holds this hand out like an offering, palm up and fingers outstretched, inches away from Ghost's chest.

"Ready to dry off, L.T? I mean, we could keep showerin' out here if ye want to, but…" Soap trails off, eyes following the dark, angry clouds moving in from the west.

Soap has the bluest eyes. Like Scorpion grasses. Those invasive beautiful bastards spread like wildfire in his mother's dingy little garden one year and she could never get rid of them. Hell, she made the whole damn garden full of Scorpion grass.

Ghost leans his head closer- ever so minutely- to get a closer look at Soap's eyes.

Yeah. Soap's exactly like Scorpion grass.

He's certainly invasive. Ghost didn't want him at first, but he kept coming back. Over and over and over again. And, well, Ghost certainly can't stand to get rid of him now. Soap calms his jumpy fucking nerves too, just like the flowers. He smoothes out Ghost's worries like it's as easy as spreading melted butter on toast.

Forget-me-nots.

That's right- they're also called forget-me-nots.

Ghost couldn't forget Soap for anything. He'd know him anywhere, anywhere at all. On earth, in hell, somewhere in the gray in between. Ghost could be blind and deaf, yet still know Soap if the man was near him.

Scorpion grass might just be his favorite flower if he allows himself that much.

"…Ghost? Ye alright?"

Ghost blinks, ripping his gaze away from the vast ocean he almost drowned in. With another, deliberate, blink, he realizes Soap is blushing. Pink dusts over his cheeks, his eyes struggling to hold their place on Ghost.

"Somethin' on my face?" Soap chuckles, the sound high and tense.

Ghost swallows, breath catching in his throat so suddenly his mouth dries up. He tugs his mask all the way down again, and fixes it firmly in place.

None of it matters anyway. Not a single bit of it. Not the way Soap looks at him like he's the most important thing in the room, not the way his face heats up when Soap punches his shoulder before they load out on a mission, and definitely not the way his heart pitter-patters oh-so quickly when Soap smiles at him when he says a stupid, corny joke.

None of that matters because the Scorpion grass in his dead mother's garden flopped over and went to hell when Ghost tried to care for them after she was gone, and so will Soap.

"Get out of yer head, Ghost."

Ghost flinches his head back, the sternness in Soap's tone sending him reeling.

"I'm was not-"

"Ye were. Ye had that 1,000-yard-stare glossed over yer eyes," Soap squints at him.

"I always have that stare, Soap. It's part of the fucking job," Ghost bites back.

"Sure, but when ye're out of it, it looks different."

"It does not-"

"Yes, it bloody does!" Soap sneers, the genuine anger in his face catching Ghost off guard. Ghost watches Soap as he sucks in a deep breath, clenching and unclenching his jaw, before swallowing behind the perfect columns in his neck. "It does. And I am sick and tired of losin' ye to yerself."

Ghost looks at him, really looks at him for any sign of- hell, he doesn't fucking know anymore. Resentment, maybe? Soap has every right to hate him.

Soap sighs, running his ungloved hand through his hair. His shoulders seem so weighted. Ghost wants to hold it all for him; carry everything even if the weight of it all breaks his bones twice over.

"Let's get inside, L.T." Soap reaches out his hand again, stronger this time and no longer shaking. "Before the rain makes ye more sick. We're both soaked to the bone and the fuckin' shack doesn't have any heating. Nothing 'sides a little fireplace. Hope ye don't mind strippin' down to yer tighty-whities near me."

It kills Ghost. It kills him that Soap doesn't speak a word of Ghost's several outbursts and breakdowns that have happened in the span of… of- Christ above, what time is it? How long has he been smothered in his head over Christmas lights?

Ghost takes a weary breath before he fully gets 'lost in his head' again.

The look of relief that breaks across Soap's face when Ghost strongly grasps his hand is enough to make the man's knees weak.

"Can't wait to see your Hello Kitty briefs again, Johnny," Ghost deadpans as Soap pulls them both to their feet. He knows Soap sees the way he sways with the rain, the way he uses the wall for support- Ghost can see it in his eyes. He's thankful, graciously thankful, when Soap doesn't mention it.

"That was one bloody time. Was Gaz's fault anyway," Soap grumbles, still holding Ghost's hand in his as he leads them inside.

As Ghost tentatively steps into the safehouse again, he realizes that Soap is a saint. Even though he's technically a mass murder, his sins are washed away with the simple act of rearranging a small shack.

Everything remotely Christmas themed is out of sight. No ornaments, no tree, no stockings, no snowmen, no Santas, no paper snowflakes- and not one single Christmas light. Ghost feels his face warm up a stupid amount as he tracks his eyes over the firepit.

The blood is gone.

Soap cleaned the fucking blood.

Ghost whips his head around, and in a rare moment- one of many so far tonight- his mouth is open without a sound coming out.

He wants to say something, really he does, but what can he say when Soap is busying himself with acting as if nothing has changed. As if this is the first time they've walked into the dump.

As if he isn't making a vile, almost forgotten feeling crescendo up in the empty void behind Ghost's sternum.

"Let's raid the place, yeah?" Soap says, looking over the layout. "There's the kitchen, living room, and bedroom. Though, that's fucking generous to call it that, eh?"

Soap is right; the living room and kitchen combined couldn't be more than 12 feet across and 10 feet wide. The bedroom is more of a closet with a pile of blankets against the wall. But, still, the kitchen has cabinets and the living room has a fireplace… that hopefully works.

"You search the kitchen, I'll see if the pit is functional," Ghost murmurs, ignoring how the words grate against his raw throat. Away from the rain, the chill of his soaked clothes is settling on his skin. He's ready to get warm and sleep away the pounding in his head.

"Copy that, L.T." Soap beams, sparing one brief glance before turning on his heels to ramble through the cabinets.

"And Johnny?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

Johnny gives a lopsided smile that makes his eyes shine. "Of course, Simon."

[psianabel]

Ephemer's and Brain's scenes where they get appointed as a Union Leader - a comparison (and some other stuff relating to that)

Hi I'm Psi and I've been rotating these scenes in my mind for so long I just need to put down some words about this. Idk how long this is going to be, but I hope you will enjoy this. (Also screw the 10 picture limit of tumblr.)

There is quite the difference between those two scenes and it reflects a lot about their relationship with Ava, how they treat the title as a Union Leader, and are just ... generally interesting to look at, now that we kinda know everything.

The first frame each scene.

We know all of them got appointed at this same hill (except Strelitzia and, well, Ventus). Yet right from the start - even though the positioning are the same between them, Brain is seen lying down on the hill as Ava talks to him, while Ephemer seems to have been called to the hill to meet Ava there. Ava might have joined Brain on the hill instead of the other way around.

Brain is seen with the Rule Book in his hands already. The conversion starts for us right in the middle - he already got that book, and Ava told him to become a Union Leader.

The scene with Ephemer also starts right in the middle for us. Yet he doesn't have the rule book yet, but also asks Ava the same question as Brain.

Let's continue with Ephemer's scene for now. He questions everything Ava tells him, can't quite understand this end of the world, how he can't wrap his head around this while Ava already tells him what he has to do. It is very overwhelming for him (understandable), but he tries to listen to Ava's talk.

Ava assures him he isn't alone in this, that they can work together.

Ephemer just takes it all in, without questioning this loud on screen. I'm certain his mind is running miles right now. A silent thinker.

Brain, however, reacts quite differently. While we don't see the conversation they had before, the talk about the end, the war, doesn't happen here (which I definitely get from a narration point, and assume happened as he got the Rule Book before this scene started).

Instead he questions the choice of him taking on such an important role, immediately asking whose idea this was. Ava tells him the truth, that it was the Master of Masters, and assures him he'll be fine. And again Brain isn't quite happy about the work he just got appointed to do, and questions her about the four others - Ava must have told him about how they will take over the roles of the foretellers, to lead the Unions, how they can work together etc.

While he doesn't get an answer to his question, Ava's answer is still enough for him to draw an answer for himself - looking right through everything, how they aren't supposed to meet up before the war to do something unexpected.

"Clever as always" says to me that Ava knew Brain before all this. They definitely have met before, Ava knows how Brain thinks, how he's like and what he's capable of. Her short answers of "you'll be fine" over and over imply to me that.

The two scenes now drift apart in terms of the topic, yet they still kind of follow the same path.

Ava asks Ephemer to prepare for the other world - the world she intends to send the Dandelions to - while she starts a conversation about fate and destiny about Brain.

Again, let's start with Ephemer's scene first. Ava has given Ephemer the Rule Book now, and while Ephemer is still hung up about everything Ava just told him, Ava tells him how this other world won't have the Dandelions remember the war. Ephemer counters with how he isn't sure if this is a good idea, how the past is what makes the future after all. Ava notes how she thought he might say that and wonders if he still thought the same if he was there to witness the end.

Ephemer doesn't answer and the scene ends.

Throughout the entire scene Ava stays serious, going through this calm and collected without showing much emotion. The only time she does crack a small smile is at the very end.

Ava, now having joined Brain's side on the ground, starts dropping think-pieces towards Brain about the future, about predetermined fate, and if you knew what would happen, would you be able to change it.

Brain always answers her curious questions with curious questions of his own, furthering the discussion with her. He brings up the Book of Prophecies and knows how it holds the future in text form, wonders if you were to change the future if the text were to change as well.

Ava's expressions during that scene stays smiling, she chuckles at some answers from Brain, ... it comes off as appreciation that Brain just gets her, understands what she is about and her thought process.

A wavelength they share. Ava trusts him and you can see it in that conversation alone.

It is interesting, because with Ephemer - as he states the past is what makes the future - she simply comes off as "don't think about that. Follow the rules set in stone". Ephemer tries to challenge the thought, but Ava shuts him down. Even that far that, when he later meets Brain for the first time and Brain asks about the rules, Ephemer remembers Ava's words and follows what he had been told to.

Sure, these two topics - between Ava and Ephemer, and Ava and Brain - are different, yet it is still a conversation only the two individually got. And I can't help but compare these two, because the intentions of these scenes are the same, yet so vastly different excecuted.

And to bring everything to a peak, Brain's scene continues with him getting the Book of Prophecies, together with the list of the names of the five new Union Leaders.

Again, Ava trusts Brain in this, how he uses it, what he's supposed to do with it. And he assures her that he understood her message loud and clear. The scene ends with Brain saying he won't open it if he can avoid it and Ava, again, assuring him that he will know best.

Ava was intrusted to give the Book of Prophecies to one of the new Union Leaders in secret, noted that no one else from the other four should ever get their hands on it. Now that we know it wasn't Brain who was supposed to get it, the look at this and some other scenes get quite ... interesting.

There are some leftover things I want to cover.

- Ava and Brain have a much more comfortable conversation than Ava and Ephemer. I conclude from that that they knew each other before all this, as I mentioned before. Ephemer states that Ava is easy to talk to, so maybe that is also a factor. I also conclude from this that she specifically chose Brain for the Book because she already knew him. If she knew him before or after she got the list with the names would really be interesting to know, but sadly we don't know that. (But could you imagine if she knew him before she got her role?)

- Maybe Ephemer just needed this serious talk. We do know him as his bright, laughing boy, able to make friends quickly. He has troubles making important serious decisions alone (Shift Pride for example). Brain on the other hand is the more serious one, and Ava was more smiley in his scene - he can make decisions on his own if he wants to, maybe coming from a background where he was alone pre keyblade war times. Hm, just wondering here how this might be relevant to Missing Link one day ...

- Which scene happens first? Ephemer's or Brain's? I can only speculate, but let's put some things in order. We see one other scene between Ephemer and Ava, and it is when they meet at the fountain on the day Ephemer first met Player. There the conversation starts with "oh your name is Ephemer, right?" as if they ... have maybe met once before. Ava would definitely know Ephemer more here already if they had the talk about the Union Leader thing already. It must have been later than this then, though not much all too later, because Ephemer vanishes shortly after, to carry out what Ava asked him to do.

- So, Brain's scene before or after this point? We don't have a clear indication. I want to bring in the lines during the Ephemer - Ava fountain scene "Hey, maybe talking about the Book will cheer you up!" "Not a chance." here, simply because I feel this is important to Ava's decision of giving Brain the Book. Ephemer is so curious about the Book of Prophecies, he doesn't hide it. There is another line I want to bring in now, from the KHUx Finale.

"Master Ava told me you've been wanting to read the Book for a long time." This very line could reference this very fountain scene, implying that Brain and Ava met again at some later point to let him know just about that. Which is interesting, because it means that Brain knew that Ephemer was a Union Leader even before the war, or maybe Ava told him in a way without mentioning he's a new leader - paraphrasing here - "there is a boy called Ephemer who wants to read the Book so badly". Either way, it makes me think Brain's scene happened before Ephemer's just because of this line.

- following up on my previous point, Brain knowing that Ephemer wants to read the Book so badly from the very beginning makes the keyblade graveyard scene of them meeting for the first time interesting to look at. Other theories aside here, Brain asking him if he's the leader and if they should follow the rules, knowing this one thing about Ephemer - challenging him like Ava did in his scene, but this time in reversed roles. Kind of to see where he stands.

- knowing all that, seeing their relationship flourish through the game is so ... good. From Brain questioning if he's the leader to downright trusting him by showing him the list of the names of the Union Leaders, being the first person Brain seeks out to talk about this issue they face. I will not go into details about that, I just want to conclude it with my final image.

The keyblade, the Book, it was meant for Ephemer all this time - implying that Ephemer was the one who was circled in red by the Master of Masters in the first place.

I could go into another deep dive here, about how this was meant to happen in the first place, how even if Ava wanted to challenge fate and destiny by switching around the owners, this timeline was written down in the first place like that - but maybe that's for another day.

So ..... yeah.

Two scenes, so different, yet so similar to the core. Ephemer, who took his role as a Union Leader serious right away. Brain, who calls him a leader right away, calling himself lazy and not fit for the job in the first place.

Yet in the end they worked together blindly, understood and trusted each other.

Anyways uhhh, that's all, thanks for reading and I hope my jumbled thoughts make somewhat sense, lmao.

[floof-writes]

i love when tragedies are like “the love was there. it didnt change anything. it didnt save anyone. there were just too many forces against it. but it still matters that the love was there”

-Starpeace, tumblr

This isn't my normal type of post, but I just closed my high school's production of 'Puffs, Or: Seven Increasingly Eventful Years at a Certain School of Magic and Magic', and I can't stop thinking about it. This show broke me and put me back together and I don't know what to fucking do about it.

I played the role of Megan Jones, and she taught me how to be a person again. Skip straight to the next heading if you just want to know what the hell I'm talking about, otherwise, here's my Love Letter to Puffs: you deserve the world and the world doesn't deserve you, but every person reading this deserves to see this show at least once in their life.

First of all, this show is hilarious. Like, 'laugh until your stomach hurts and you can't breath and you start coughing up your sanity' hilarious. Your abs will hurt after seeing this show and your tear ducts will struggle to keep up with demand. But, despite that, or maybe because of that, it is also heartbreaking. Maybe the best kind, I think. The kind that rips your heart into pieces but then sews it back together, tells you that you have to carry on, but somehow that's worse, because hope hurts more than anything else.

And to see Puffs is one thing, but to be in it?

I don't know what to do or how to feel. For the rest of my life I will have carry this grief nestled next to my soul. The characters have the faces of people I know, and goddamn that makes it so hard to think about but just as hard not to.

I am changed, for this show. I am a different person at the other end of this nine week love-stained, obsessive hell. It found me when I was in a very vulnerable place, only halfway to healing, and picked me up and straight up told me to my Megan's face that I "shouldn't have to be alone"! Told me safety is love and loneliness is a lie we tell ourselves when we hate ourselves too much to see reason. That justice is the only pursuit that brings both self-love and heartache.

Live theatre is a powerful, powerful thing and yes, a professional recording of Puffs is available on Amazon Video and some pretty good bootlegs are up on YouTube, but if this show is open anywhere near you at a local high school, college, or community theatre, then I'm begging you to go see it in person. High school-age actors are uniquely suited to this show so don't let that make you wary!

If anyone, ever, wants to talk about Puffs, I'm more than available. PM me, ask me, tag me in your post. I don't care if you're seeing this post 2 months or 2 years or 10 years from now, if I am still on this hellsite, I will respond.

Go see Puffs. If everyone on this planet did, I think the world would be just a slightly better place.

Okay, hold on, what's Puffs?

Puffs tells us the story of a certain badger-aligned house during the seven years a certain orphan boy wizard attends a certain school of magic, plus ✨it was the 90's✨. If you can't tell, Puffs is technically a Harry Potter parody, and it very intentionally gives JKR no money and is not licensed with Warner Bros. Maybe that's a small part of why it spoke to me so much, because in the simplest terms: Puffs won custody of me in the great JKR/Fandom divorce. I really felt betrayed by JKR's transphobia and treatment of representation issues and this show was a bandaid and a kiss better for my aching, eleven year-old heart.

The story follows the Puff Wayne Hopkins, a young British orphan who was raised by his uncle in New Mexico. Wayne is the nerdiest, 90's-est kid you've ever met and well, as a fan of Star Wars and Dungeons & Dragons and Lord of the Rings, when he gets his school letter he gets this idea in his head that his life is about to become as awesome as that of the average fantasy protagonist. That he's gonna be a hero! Of course, he isn't. That's Harry. It's Harry at every single turn and Wayne and his friends are constantly being screwed over as unmentioned side characters in Harry's world-shattering and school-wrecking life, not to mention that the Puffs are the laughingstock of the school anyway, constantly failing classes and being bullied by the Snakes.

The Puffs work hard to become better but it rarely turns out. I mean, just look at Cedric, who plays a huge role in mentoring Wayne and his classmates the first act. Yikes. As the Puffs grow into their teen-hood it even gets a little spicy (in the hilariously awkward, teenage way), and eventually, they each come to understand that Puffs matter, Puffs are the best, in fact, Puffs are the "Mighty Ducks of wizards. No. The Mighty Ducks 2 of Wizards!"

[writing-nebula]

Actually y'know what screw later this week I'm gonna do this now

SO, as I'm sure anybody following me knows very well, Aura tends to update very slowly, and unfortunately I often have writers block for it specifically, and honestly chapter 2 of AWU has been sitting basically untouched at like the third-to-last scene for at least a month now. Almost done! But who knows when I'll actually have the mind to finish it, because I certainly have no clue lol

Because of the slow updates/slow writing that happens for Aura, I also tend to forget about this blog about 90% of the time. Hell, I barely remember it when I'm posting Aura. And since Aura takes so long, that means this blog is basically never used, aside from the occasional ask thing that nobody ever uses and writing tips I'll sometimes reblog.

BUT, even though I haven't been writing Aura, that doesn't mean I haven't been writing at all- as shown by the post I reblogged yesterday! I've recently gotten back into Yugioh, and fic brain is Going To Town

I'll also be participating in Mayblade next month, and I have a few assorted stories half started or planned out in my notes- so writing in general has been going pretty good! Just. Not for Aura, so you haven't heard anything about it.

So with all that said, I've come to a decision- I'm going to be turning this blog into a general writing blog of my works!

I won't be backposting any of the stuff already on AO3, but I will start posting my fics to Tumblr as well as AO3, hopefully on the same day but definitely within a couple days, I want to keep better track of these things lol

I still have full intention to finish Aura: A World Unseen!! But right now, writing it just isn't working out, and I don't want to limit myself to only posting something that updates maybe once a year, if that.

So over the next few days, I'll be reorganizing this place a bit, changing up the pictures and messing with the theme probably (honestly I have no idea what the theme even is, Eko set that up and I only look at the blog on mobile lol) and then I'll probably start with fic posting on May 1st- again, for Mayblade! If someone from the Beyblade fandom has found their way here, you know what's about to happen lol

I want to thank everyone following me here So Much for your support, and while I'm sorry the content you signed up for is taking so long to come out, I do hope you'll stick around and see what other stuff I'll be writing in the meantime!

[essektheylyss]

wait! be wordy! what's your line of thinking for the assembly coup i'm so curious

okay you sent this a few days ago and I was like, you know what they asked, so here is my entire research project on the subject of why not only is the assembly in a perfect place to stage a coup and take over the empire, but also why ludinus da’leth in particular seems rather motivated to do so:

fjord and caleb discussed this specific topic during their chat on the balleater in 98, and this line just sums it up:

fjord: what are they waiting for? caleb: the moment where they can ascend.

according to the lore we’ve gotten, from canon as well as the egtw, the assembly has existed since a war between mage houses that culminated in an event that nearly destroyed rexxentrum, referred to as the eve of crimson midnight—after which the members of those houses agreed to work for the dwendalian crown (and helped conquer the julous dominion). they occupy a very comfortable place in the empire obviously, but it’s unclear how much allegiance they actually have to the crown, but when caleb talks to the martinet in episode 97 at the party, they have this pointed interaction:

caleb: the empire, we all love the empire. da’leth: to an extent.

this is in part in reference to caleb’s past, but also... is admittedly, a strange thing for someone who’s meant to serve the king to say. much of their conversation at the party reads as da’leth putting the two of them on the same page—rather circumspect in their interests, and outside of the surface level realm of the empire’s interests. it’s worth noting that da’leth is not only the oldest member of the assembly, he has also been there since its inception, and therefore was almost certainly involved in the war that created it.

now, just before this, they have this exchange:

caleb: It will be good to finish this war. da’leth: Indeed it will be. caleb: I commend you on seeing the reason in cooperation and negotiation. da’leth: I believe it is important to stem the tide of lives lost and to instead focus on the livelihood of those within the Empire and for us to pursue more important things than base conflict and disagreements.

now, like essek, da’leth is likely looking forward to the end of the war because it means uninhibited time to spend researching the beacon they do have, but based on much of what essek has said, he is far more in over his head than da’leth is. of course, that’s in part because he’s not backed by a very powerful organization. but this is important, because arguably... da’leth isn’t backed by the assembly. he is the assembly. there has never been a cerberus assembly without him. additionally, his title (“archmage of domestic protections”) literally puts him in charge of all warfare and conflict in the empire and, as mentioned, this means he’s been involved in:

the eve of crimson midnight

the conquest of the julous dominion

the last century of tension with the dynasty (by the end of which, he found a way to escalate that tension and thereby instigate a war—which really makes him either great or shitty at his job, honestly)

the war with the dynasty itself

unlike essek, who has probably had his position for 20-30 years at most, da’leth has witnessed every part of these conflicts from a place of organizing warfare. (yet again it vexes me: we still have no idea what essek does. but he’s not really important here, I’m just using him to juxtapose. but it seems safe to say, based on his reaction, that he did not have any experience with it, and does not seem to be in anyway a military leader.) he knows when to expect war, and he... probably does not care about the human toll of it, based on the ones he’s lived through. so I’m looking more at the phrase “pursue more important things”—which is where we start getting into military coup territory.

and it’s important to point out that the assembly, based on their discussion in the throne room with the king and the examination of the beacon at the sanatorium, is almost certainly keeping both their research into the beacon’s power as well as the fact that they’ve had two beacons for three years secret from the king.

additionally, the assembly’s power seems to be growing at the moment, as evidenced by cobalt soul concerns that it may need to be curbed, while at the same time, the monarch is becoming increasingly paranoid (which translates to, closed off), as well as (and this is crucial) not having an heir. as mentioned in the egtw, his son and daughter in law have not produced a child, and all three of them are seeking different ways to maintain power. king dwendal, supposedly, is currently looking for ways to become immortal. da’leth, who is functionally immortal compared to the king, probably doesn’t love that (and I have no doubt that he knows).

so we have a military leader who has external interests, secret arcane research into an unknown, fairly deadly system of magic that the crown is unaware of (and therefore doesn’t have defenses against), and a rapidly encroaching potential power vacuum. but that’s still not enough, right? to actually take the throne, who has an entire army at its disposal, you’d need some kind of paramilitary force loyal to the assembly, not to the crown.

which brings us to the scourgers.

we know that trent ikithon created and designed the scourger program, also from caleb’s conversation with da’leth, which means it is relatively new (less than 50 years old, but probably less than that—trent is in his 70s, and he would’ve had to work up into his role, so let’s give him a generous estimate of being worthy of assembly membership around 40—which only puts the scourger program at 30 years old). da’leth does have a... really interesting comment about the program:

da’leth: Although the extent of these things were not entirely part of the initial presentation, I understand that sometimes, desperate requirements might call for unsavory methods.

there’s really no explanation of what these ‘desperate requirements’ are that called for, you know, that bullshit, and the program would’ve been implemented sometime within this cold war they’ve got going with the dynasty. while those desperate requirements may have been involved in that (which is likely), it’s also possible that there are other uses for them, especially now that there is some kind of treaty between the empire and dynasty.

of course, the other thing that I looked at is how astrid discusses the empire—she suggests that what the scourgers do, the “hard choices” they make, are so that the rest of the empire can sleep safely at night, which is interesting, considering the general sentiment of the empire’s populace is that the empire has become less safe (a sentiment that is likely even more heightened now with a war on their soil) as well as less prosperous, due to the growing paranoia and neglect of the king. the scourgers are specifically loyal to the empire itself, not the king—if they can be swayed to believe that disposing the king is in the nation’s best interest, it would not be difficult to turn the assembly’s personal assassins toward the crown.

which brings me back to the earlier conversation mentioned at the party, and the phrase “focus on the livelihood of those within the Empire and for us to pursue more important things.” the martinet has been, essentially, waiting in the wings of the empire for several centuries.

within the last, say, fifty years, the following things have happened:

the quality of life within the empire has gone down

its monarch has grown closed off and scared, potentially leaving a power vacuum which will likely throw the assembly’s power into question

the assembly has created its own paramilitary assassin force

the assembly has instigated a war via the theft of foreign arcane objects

the assembly has done fully secret research on the application of that arcane power

the assembly has then ended the war very quickly, retaining control of one of these objects, and sent everyone very speedily on their way.

furthermore, with peace only just brokered, the righteous brand is likely still on the border, and will have to be mobilized over the next month or more to return them to the inner parts of the empire.

this means the assembly is unoccupied by a war, has its own forces, probably has some unheard of weaponized dunamancy, and doesn’t have to contend with the military that is wholly loyal to the king.

time for a coup, y’all.

addendum: this is a theory/analysis, and it’s only one potential thing that might happen in the next few arcs. however, a counterpoint: the assembly has enjoyed unprecedented power, a small amount of responsibility, and very little oversight during its existence. I could see the point that there isn’t much motivation to change that, especially for da’leth—except for the fact that the empire still does not have an heir. the potential of a power vacuum will likely leave the assembly in a tough spot and without a puppet to control, and a coup to take power now may be the answer to that. that really is the key: before dwendal can actually do something nuts, like beat da’leth to creating himself a phylactery lol, they may intend to grab power to maintain control over the situation in the long run.

additional reading: I wrote up this post a few months ago about why, in conjunction with this, the assembly wants to keep their involvement with the beacon theft quiet—any conflict with the king will get started on their own terms. (which is the main point of my thoughts that the assembly will also likely try to have essek killed—while he’s alive, he’s a loose end, and even if it’s his word against theirs, it’s still possible he could sow doubt with the king. luckily for the nein, the assembly doesn’t seem to know that they’re aware of that!)

[qqueenofhades]

1of 3) feel free to ignore this, but I'm doing Dracula Daily (never read it before) and I have a lot of feelings/thoughts and seeing as you've read it, I hope you don't mind if I rant a bit. I really want to shake Van Helsing until he starts telling people stuff. Like I can kind of get him not wanting to tell Seward that it's a vampire so he doesn't seem crazy and get institutionalized, but at some point, he should have told him anyway, or just made it clear that Lucy needs watching every night

2of3) and not just depend on telegrams/letters to tell him to watch her. But then she dies, and still instead of telling anyone what's going on, he just tells Seward that he needs to get him some surgeon tools so he can remove her head and heart (because talking about needlessly (at least to Seward) removing body parts of a corpse makes way more sense then mentioning a vampire and definitely makes him seem sane). He even talks about how they need to work together as one and need trust, of 3) and it's like my dude, have you even once considered how much easier it may be for people to work together with you as one, to trust you when you need it, if they have even a slight hint of what's going on? Personally if someone asks me to do something odd/hard/weird etc. I'm much more likely to do it, or at least complain less, if I know the reason besides a 'I'm so-and-so and you should do what I say' reason. Again, sorry for the rant.

Hush now. Of course I am delighted that people have so many feelings about a 19th-century classic horror novel that they want to come shout in my inbox about it! This is exactly why I love Dracula Daily as a concept, and think it's really clever. Everyone kind of.... already knows Dracula by cultural osmosis (he's a vampire! He has a swoopy dark cloak and he can turn into a bat! He sneaks around and Vants to Suck Your Blud!) but they are discovering they don't actually know many details about the text, and that modern adaptations have often totally slaughtered it in the aims of making it Sexy or otherwise introducing themes/readings that are not necessarily present in the original. So yes, I have read Dracula before, but I'm still really enjoying seeing the way Tumblr has gone ape for it and are all indignantly signing up for the Lucy Westenra and Mina Murray Defense Squad and drawing fanart and making memes and dropping casual references to the "polycule" and so forth. Yes.

Anyway, I wrote this post the other day discussing how everyone's over-reliance on traditional social conventions, and trying to follow the rules of how to be Good Victorians, has totally fucked them over. The whole point of what's going on is that they all keep trying to act like it's a normal situation and they need to be Decorous and Proper and Not Alarm Anyone, and like... that's the exact sort of thing Dracula feeds on (literally and metaphorically). Because he's weaponizing their extreme middle-class Victorian Englishness against them, where they can't talk to each other and they can't discuss how they feel and they can't be honest, all for fear of Offending Protocol, they're screwed. They can't coordinate, they can't do anything that might long-term help, and there is of course an interesting subtextual queer reading here, considering that Bram Stoker is universally considered to have been a repressed gay man who hid/denied his sexuality and lived in, to say the least, an openly homophobic society. Whether or not it was his primary intention to portray the rules of Good Victorian Behavior not working and instead actually actively harming people by forcing them to keep secrets and not trust that anyone else will believe them, it's an unavoidable theme in the text and one that a modern reader definitely picks up on with the benefit of hindsight.

Also, I think it's important to highlight that despite his 84 PhDs (of course he's a lawyer as well as a doctor) and generally being the book-smartest person in the story, Van Helsing has, at this point, comprehensively failed. He hasn't saved Lucy's life, he hasn't prevented her from turning into a vampire, he hasn't warned anyone else about what's really going on, he hasn't prevented Mrs. Westenra from being frightened to death, he hasn't told Arthur (poor Arthur!!!) anything about why he wouldn't even let him kiss his fiancee as she was dying, etc. And a huge part of this is because, as you point out, he hasn't told anyone anything. Van Helsing has often been narratively paralleled to Dracula, which I think is accurate: he is solely in charge of Lucy's health, as Dracula is the sole reason for hurting it. He tries to control Lucy, he tries to keep her loved ones in the dark, he tries to basically "have" her for himself -- all in the name of helping her, yes, but his treatment is just as ineffective as Dracula's assault is effective. Van Helsing means all the best, but he's kind of fucked it up!

And yes, the primary reason he's doing so is because he thinks that he alone is smart enough to solve the problem, he can't let anyone else onto his plans (even when Quincey strolled in, took one look, and was like "oh yeah this was like the time the vampire bit my horse" and asked the OBVIOUS FUCKING QUESTION of where all of Lucy's blood was going!) and he otherwise is the Only One. Just like Dracula's pride, arrogance, solitude, stubbornness, and insistence that his will/choices for Lucy are the only ones that matters, Van Helsing is doing the same thing, from the opposite side of the coin. That's why his methods can't possibly work to counteract Dracula and (as we will see in the latter half of the novel) they need to comprehensively rethink their entire strategy and discard all the old social rules and worry for "decorum" that has kept them from being honest with each other so far. But yes, we love us a good hero/villain narrative foil with the same flaws and the same methods. Which is what is definitely going on here. Because things such as Mrs. Westenra removing the garlic flowers happen because Van Helsing didn't even tell her that they were medicinal (you have one million doctorates, Abraham, make up a scholarly bullshit reason!)

So yes, as I said, and as we will see in upcoming entries, Following The Good Victorian Rules has fucked everyone over HARD, Van Helsing is acting like Dracula while trying to fix Dracula's damage and that's why it isn't working, and our heroes are going to need to have a comprehensive rethink of what they're doing and why, if they want to stop any of this in time. Dun dun dunnn!

[dangermousie]

I'm not the anon who asked 2ha...but can I ask the same question (top fav characters and fav moments) for one of your all time top 10 fav novels? Thanks....

Hi, I'm the anon who asked the ask above....If you don't mind can I just ask your top 10 fav books (fiction)? And why you love them? Thanks so much...Sorry if I ask again, I love reading your answers....

You're one of the rare person in tumblr (that I know of) that really dive in all kind of fandoms not just stick to one...and it's so refreshing....Thanks so much for your blog....Love it...🤩

Awww, thank you! I am gonna limit myself to one book (or one series) by an author or this list will be only Jorge Amado, Dorothy Dunnett and Erich Maria Remarque, and here are the ones that come to mind atm though the moment I click post, I bet I will go, I forgot X argh! No order and I am gonna do dozen because I am incapable of narrowing:

Erich Maria Remarque, Three Comrades - I have loved every Remarque novel that I've ever read (Night in Lisbon and Triumphal Arc especially) but nothing compares with Three Comrades to me - the friendship, the sense of the world utterly falling apart, and the discovery of love in this mess, but love that can only be doomed. That brutal, bleak, appallingly hopeless ending is something I can still recite word for word. There is nothing glorious or romantic about death, just ugliness and loss and the end of the world. Fuck. I am sniffling again.

Dorothy Dunnett, The Lymond Chronicles - this is my favorite set of novels ever. Smart, passionate, twisty, with amazing characters, feeling of being in another world and so much intensity and pain. (They are very different in most ways, but she and Meatbun are the only ones who've ever been able to eviscerate me utterly.) If I could pick more than one work by an author, her gorgeous, grim King Hereafter would also be on the list.

Jorge Amado, Teresa Batista, Home from the Wars - this is not his most well known novel (that would probably be Gabriela Cloves and Cinnamon or Dona Flor and Her Two Husbands, which are amazing) but it is my favorite. It reads like poetry and combines such utter horror (this book needs a trigger warning list the size of my arm) with such hope and strength of the main character.

Ivan Yefremov, Thais of Athens - I read it as a tween, glued the way I never was before. This is on the list because no novel transported me this hard to another world, this one an idealized version of Ancient Greece - this is the closest I've ever come to being in a time machine.

Emile Zola, Les Rougon-Macquart - this is a 20 novel series that encompasses both some super famous novels (Germinal, Nana) and some less known ones, but together it is such an incredible, thorough portrayal of second-half of 19th century France - its every facet, every class, every environment. The word "epic" gets thrown around a lot, but this is a unique case where it's deserved. It is full of screwed up characters and relationships as well as heroic ones, and I like some novels more than others but the whole thing is an insane achievement.

Leon Feuchtwanger, The Spanish Ballad - Feuchtwanger's most famous novel is Jew Suss, but my favorite is this story about the love affair between Spanish King Alfonso VIII and his mistress Raquel. The examination of passion versus ideals of glory is so good and it has my favorite concept of repentance and realization that comes too late. As Alfonso admits, to his confessor's horror, he loved Raquel "more than my immortal soul," but he left her to chase empty military glory (which he did not get, he was routed) not knowing his happiness was already within his arms and he realizes it will never come again...

Meatbun Doesn't Eat Meat, The Dumb Husky and His White Cat Shizun (2ha) -I am not going over it again since I've posted about it way too much but there is a reason this is the sole web novel on this list. It's a fucking masterpiece go read it blah blah.

Hilary Mantel, A Place of Greater Safety - this is a glorious, complex novel about the French Revolution that I loved enough to have scribbled quotes from it all over in my notebooks...

Stanislaw Lem, Return from the Stars - Lem's most famous work is probably Solaris (and it's amazing) but I am clearly keeping my track record of picking the less known works. This is a story of astronauts who return to the world that has moved on (which they knew) but also that world that eliminated danger and heroism both, and the protagonist finds himself adrift - with PTSD from past horrors but unmoored in this bland, overly safe world, is just so amazing. He finds his meaning through love of a woman, but it's not perfect and compromise with that society and there is no easy way out of it all, just best way available to you.

Strugatskii Brothers, It's Hard to Be a God - perhaps the best take on why time traveling to the much earlier period of history won't create progress but just fuck you up instead. Its take on morality, historical progress, and the toll it takes to be a dispassionate observer is amazing.

Njal's Saga - not a novel strictly speaking but whatever. This is a famous Icelandic saga and I love it for a glimpse into a whole other world and the poetic feeling and Gunnar my crush.

Phil Tucker, Chronicles of the Black Gate - in a society that exists in very strict castes, a cataclysm is about to take it all down. I am getting lazy and I have a tag so I am gonna leave it at that, but this is excellent and I love what it has to say about religion and class, also OTPs galore and Asho is possibly my favorite protag ever - think a cross between Spartacus and Jesus only with a big sword.

[tardytothepardy]

Fruits Basket - Vol. 20

I want to try to break the book into three main chunks. The last time I did that, it was easier to write about. So uh, the first chunk has to do with Tohru and her feelings about Kyo, and Kagura's reaction, the second chunk is Akito and Ren's past being revealed (it's totally a mess but it's to be expected), and the third chunk is about things unraveling.

Ok cool let's do it. (The picture was at the end of one of the chapters, I just liked it a lot idk) (also tumblr needs to increase the character limit for the alt text, it's only 200 characters, which goes by quick. twitter has like,, 420, which is more manageable)

Tohru came to Kazuma's house to visit Izusu, and Kagura came to confront Tohru about something. What possibly could it be (as if I didn't say so in the beginning)? Kagura was talking about it a bit with Kazuma, and he said he just hopes that Tohru's feelings don't come from a place of pity (which is a mild "oof" point for Kagura, because that's mostly why she loved Kyo), because Kyo has had to deal with people either flat out hating him, or being nice to him out of a sense of pity. Even Kazuma admitted (earlier in the series. I don't remember when but I remember reading it) that part of the reason he took in Kyo as a child was because he was making it up for how he treated his grandfather, the previous Cat. Over time, those feelings fell away, in favor of genuinely caring for Kyo's wellbeing, but Kazuma doesn't seem to be the one who would forget about stuff like that. (Also it turns out that the previous Cat's partner basically stayed with him out of a sense of pity, as well)

It turns out that Izusu and Tohru were talking about the same thing, and Tohru worried if her feelings for Kyo were selfish, because she wanted nothing to take Kyo away from her, not the curse, not the Sohma family, nothing. Kagura then bust into the room, smacked Tohru across the fucking room it seems, and said, "Then fucking tell him that!!" (direct quote, 100%) Izusu yelled at Kagura for hitting Tohru, asking what right she had for doing that, but given Kagura's nature, it doesn't seem completely out of nowhere. She just got pretty emotional in that moment.

For Tohru, it seemed to knock the right screw loose for her, and she thought back to when she was talking about her father to Kyo, and if he said really anything against what she was talking about, she apparently would've just zipped her lips and pretended she hadn't said anything, and moved on, but he didn't. Which is pretty nice of him to do, honestly. Anyway, when she came to again (because she got knocked out from Kagura's emotion-packed slap), Kyo was sitting there, because Kazuma had called him, ("Hey dude so there was a smackdown here and Tohru got knocked out lmao" is how I'm imagining the call. kjdhkfgjh can you imagine Kazuma saying "lmao" I can't) but Kyo didn't ask about the fight (which was a Wise Lesson from Shishou™), another nice thing for him to do, though in my opinion it would be a pretty easy thing to explain.

Ok, so now onto the second chunk, which kinda has some of the stuff in the third chunk later on but whatever. Story flow, it's pristine today.

It starts with some of the,, maids? or something that are in the Sohma house (they never get names so far as I can tell, and I don't really know what to call them, but at one point someone referred to one of them as a maid, I think? Idk.) talking about Ren, and wondering why Akito still let Ren wander around freely like she does. Another said that Akito can only do so much, because apparently there is a crowd of people in the house that are "Ren-followers", and if she had Ren be completely contained within an area, there's a chance that those followers might start some shit, which would be a headache to deal with. One of the maids said that Akito has been sick (or holed up in her room) for too long, and the rest of the Juunishi are doing nothing to help, which does not help with Ren, who spouts out stuff about how the Juunishi doesn't really care about Akito at all. The maids seem to have a particular thing against Ren, because they view her as an unsuitable woman who somehow managed to become partners with Akira, the previous God, I think, but also the father of Akito.

Speaking of Akito, she has a box. That same box that Ren tried to use Izusu to get back. Something about that box has to do with Akira, and it seems important to both Akito and Ren, though honestly at this point Akito is probably just holding onto it out of spite for Ren, I wouldn't be surprised (I, too, am a petty bitch. I understand the mindset). She asked Kureno if he has any idea what is in it, and when he says he doesn't, she simply says, "Father."

Now we jump over to Ren and Shigure, who are also talking about about that elusive box. Apparently Shigure was tasked to get the box, but obviously he didn't succeed. He said (thought? He didn't say it aloud, it was one of those thoughts thing--- anyway) that he didn't really care, he didn't even want to touch that box, much less even look at it, it was no loss to him. Out loud, he says that it would be inappropriate for him to hold it, and Ren agrees, saying that only she can have it, just like how only she could have Akira, when he was alive. Are you already sensing where this is heading? Well, I'll say it anyway.

Flash back to Kureno, he's thinking about Akira, from when he was younger and Akira was still alive. He remembers Akira as very beautiful, in a fleeting way. Akira was sickly, all the time, and sad. Everyone knew that he wouldn't live for very long. But since he was the head of the house, of the family, it was imperative that he find a partner and produce an heir. That person was Ren, who was one of his care-takers. The rest of the staff (or something??) didn't like that she was going to be with Akira, it seemed unsuitable, but she was the only candidate. She was the only person who recognized how lonely he was, is what Akira said as a defense when people objected. And so, they were married. The older members of the family despised it, the younger thought it was the beginning of a new change, a new era. Ren said (because this section is flipping between Kureno and Ren) that it was only them two (haha grammar): Akira and Ren, they were all who mattered. She was everything to Akira. So when she had Akito, well, that muddled things. Because now there was another person that Akira loved: his own fuckin child. That's right. Ren got jealous of her own child because Akira loved his very own daughter. That's,, that's something. Shortly after that, Ren decided that Akito would be raised as a boy. Or maybe it was while she was still pregnant. At any rate, she said it was because it would be unsuitable for the head of the family to be a woman, but we all know the real reason: it's so that Akira wouldn't be loving another girl, even though that other girl was his daughter. Jfc Ren is a handful. From Kureno's memory, it seems like even as a kid, Shigure recognized that.

Back to Shigure and Ren, Shigure says that he feels sorry for Ren, probably thanks to all that upset she has. She says the same, that the Juunishi have had to deal with the abuse that Akito has dealt to them simply because of that "bond", and that there's no way that anyone could honestly love Akito. Shigure also comments that sometimes he thinks that if Akito had been raised as a woman, she'd look exactly like Ren, which instantly pisses Ren off. She just starts screaming about "Who do you have to thank for Akito being born! I'm the reason that (insert angry comment about how she's the only reason why x happened)". I'm kinda glad she isn't in the series much, this is exhausting. I know she's in the book later, and maybe a bit more in the next few, but jeez. It's a lot.

Anyway, let's end the chapter with Momiji having his curse be broken. The end is near (for the Juunishi, not this post lmao).

The second that the curse breaks, Akito knows it (that's probably the bond. I doubt it's some kinda "we'll be friends forever uwu" kinda thing, it's just kinda an awareness of each other, or maybe just God's awareness of everyone) and races towards Momiji, begging him to not leave. Now that the curse is broken, Momiji is confused as to how those thoughts he had prior for Akito were even there, now that he sees Akito clinging onto him, whimpering and panicked. Momiji waves her away, saying that he'll keep it a secret, and that Akito should go rest, wasn't she feeling sick earlier?

We pan over to the school, where Haru is asking Yuki if he's noticed anything off about Momiji. Haru can't place it, but something seems off, maybe not. Kyo ends up running into Momiji walking down a hallway, and asks him about it (he overheard the others talking about it), and Momiji just out and says it: his curse broke. He said he imagines that Tohru would be happier about it if it were Kyo's curse that broke, and that he (Momiji) lost. (I guess he lost in some unspoken one-sided competition of "getting" Tohru, because y'know she's not her own person who is capable of deciding these things for herself or anything)

Later, Momiji goes back to the main Sohma estate, to apologize to Akito for how he acted yesterday, but also to say that he won't be staying there any longer. Akito takes it like a champ, slapping Momiji across the face and insulting him, saying that he's a traitor, he has nowhere else to go, his family either doesn't remember him or hates him, he'll never be happy! and Momiji's just like, "Yeah lol I already feel lonely", that he can't be with the person he loves, and he no longer has that One Thing that previously connected him to most of the other people he's close with, and that there's no going back. He does say though, that it's not Akito's decision or place to say whether Momiji will ever be happy or not, because he might not be happy now, that does not mean that he won't ever be happy in the future. He then asks Akito how long she will stay at the house, thinking that eventually, everyone will come back to her, that no one will be happy without her. What if it's actually her that is most afraid-- Akito isn't down for an analysis, she just tells Momiji to leave.

Let's now go down memory lane, down a nice and happy time, especially for Akito and Ren: Akira's death and it's after effects. Happy times. (apparently i was wrong, the thing i said was the third chunk that wove in nicely with the second was just the second chunk, i think this is the actual third chunk)

Akito is thinking back (on a rainy morning, extra points for setting the mood) on her relationship with her parents. With Akira, it was nice, he always was kind and caring, telling Akito that she is what everyone has been waiting for, and that she thought she was the one Akira loved the most. With Ren, however, she was always cruel, from the start. She always glared at Akito, she was always mean. Akito hates her. We're brought back to the day Akira died, where Ren bursts into the room, asking why she wasn't notified sooner, why Akira had to die alone. One of the attendants said his condition worsened too quickly to call Ren close by, but also that Akira hadn't died alone; he died with Akito by his side. The attendant said that Akira's will had been passed onto Akito, she was now the head of the family. Ren was angered at that, there's no reason for Akito to still be around now! She only tolerated her child being around because Akira liked her, but now that Akira is gone, there is no one to love or care about Akito. Akito said that wasn't true, that all of the Juunishi will love her, because of their bond. (Which is basically what Akira said. He put most of that stuff into her head, and she doubled down on it whenever Ren said anything against it, which might as well be every single time they were around each other)

Back to the present, Kureno comes in the room to talk about something, but Akito interrupts him, saying that she was happy when Yuki was born, as the Rat. It was mostly just something she used to prove Ren wrong, and she used it as long as she could (much to the deterioration of Yuki's mental health). She thought back, over the years, to all the bad things that had happened, how she tried so hard to keep everyone close, and how all of them had, one by one, come to "betray" (cough cough, try to live their own lives, cough cough) her. After Shigure and Yuki left to their present residence, Ren said that they had given up on Akito. When Akito again mentioned their bond (which, really, now that I think about it, has basically been the singular thing straining to keep everything under control. Akito's sole sense of identity was being God, she's never had anything else.), Ren waved it away, then challenged that if any of the Juunishi can go out into the world, experience it in all it's freaky magical ways, and not be taken in by it, and instead return to Akito, then she will have been proved wrong, Akito's claims this whole time will have been correct. If they failed to, however, Ren said that Akito would have to give up the Sohma name. But Akito believed it, she truly believed she was right, that nothing big enough would come between her and the rest of the Juunishi (Tohru has entered the chat). She had to believe it, she just had to. But now, it's evident, between how Haru reacted upon learning about Izusu, Momiji's demeanor after the curse broke, the general way that the rest of the Juunishi float away from Akito, that it isn't true, and with that, she has nothing to hope for.

Upon this realization, Ren bursts into the room, knee-length hair floating around her, eyes crazed, knife in hand, demanding for Akira. Demanding for that box, and whatever contents were inside. In response, Akito fuggin yeeted it at Ren, she didn't give a shit. It flashed back to right before Akira died, and he soothed Akito by saying that, despite dying, he will always be with her. He wanted for Ren to be happy. He wasn't upset that he was dying so soon, he knew that he was just a man who was going to die, but he was happy that he was able to have a child, and to have had that child with Ren, and since that child was special, it was proof that their relationship was a special one. Back to the present, Ren scrambles to the box, tears it open hungrily to find,,, nothing. The box was empty. It'd always been empty, said to have held Akira's soul, but it was mostly just something to help Akito with Akira's passing. Suddenly, Akito grabbed the knife that fell from Ren's hand, poised to stab Ren but then--

Hiro's curse broke. Ren can thank that bond she always scoffed at for saving her life. But hey, now Hiro can hold his baby sister, which is nice. Yay for family moments.

Boo for Akito, because it's just really grinding in that the curse is quickly falling apart, and there's absolutely nothing that she can do about it. Ren taunts Akito, asking if she was trying to kill her. The attendants blow up, one yelling at Ren for making such a scene, taking a knife with her, and another scolds the first for giving Akito that box in the first place, it's stupid! The first attendant said that Akito knew from the start that it was empty, common sense would say that much! (idk man it could've held one last letter from Akira to Akito, a letter wouldn't affect the weight of the box significantly, it's not common sense)

Akito leaves the room, and Kureno follows. Akito says that it was both common sense but also not, that there wasn't anything in the box. She wanted to believe there was a chance that something was in that box, some kind of invisible energy that would help her. But even after opening it, seeing that it was empty, she still held onto it, knowing there wasn't anything. And that was her common sense, that's what she thought. She'd never been given any other way of thinking, of living, so why and how should anyone expect differently? Kureno says that she can start learning now, that that was what he wanted to talk about earlier, that she can't stay here, she'll never be able to move on, to which Akito cuts him off with "Fuggin now, bitch?? You're saying that now?? That doesn't help me! It would have helped in the beginning! But not fucking now!" (which btw is true. i doubt akito was even allowed to go to a public school, that she was schooled within the estate. i really believe that she's never really been outside of the the properties that the Sohma family owns) Then she stabs Kureno, with that knife she's been holding all this time. She reasons with it saying that Kureno's "halfway kindness" has been killing her this whole time, that it can't be fixed by Kureno saying that maybe Akito should go touch some grass. As Akito is running from the scene (more like haggardly stumbling), she continues thinking that it's Kureno's fault, it's not on her, until she remembers what Yuki was saying at the New Year's gathering about blame. It doesn't really fix anything, it just momentarily makes you think that you're not in the wrong. *record scratch* What if it's Akito's fault, then? All of this? What if it's her fault? What if it's the fault of the person who made everyone change? What if it's Tohru's fault?? (dun dun dunnnn)

Meanwhile, back at the other Sohma house (Shigure's house?) Tohru has some confessing to do. Before that though, Kyo has some confessing to do, though not about the same thing. He tells Tohru that he knew her mom before she died, and that he was the reason she died. He tells her that they met when he was really young, and how they had kinda become friends (in that way that people become friends by talking often, but Kyo never told Kyoko his name, because he had some weird thing about having a name so similar). That all fell apart the day that Tohru went missing. He promised that he would find her and rescue her, but after finding that Yuki had done it (the evidence was The Hat), he lashed out, and never talked to Kyoko again. Years later, when he was at the crosswalk, who was beside him but Kyoko, who he recognized instantly. He wasn't sure what to do, whether to say something to her or hold back. He was totally able to grab her arm, get her out of harm's way, but he didn't, he was too scared. (plus yaknow the whole cat thing) He beats himself up about, still to this day. He does the same with his own mom's death. It was his fault that his mom killed herself, she couldn't stand having such a monster as a child. It was too much for her, and she couldn't take any longer. (It wasn't. I won't say that his mom wasn't put under strain for having Kyo, for knowing that he wasn't human, that he turned into a weird monster if his bracelet was taken off, but from what we've seen of his dad, it was probably at least 85-90% his dad's fault. He was too caught up in the politics of the Sohma family, ashamed of the fact that Kyo was the Cat, the worst out of them, that he couldn't even salvage having one of the good freaks to have as a child of his, and he took it all out on his wife and later his son.)

And the book ends on that cheery note. (Why do I say stuff like that why I am I like this)

[petrichoravellichor]

I’ve had a couple of people request this, so here ya go: my masterlist for the SPN Deserved Better 31 Days Creative Challenge hosted by the wonderful @foundfamily4eva ​, in which I basically tried to fix canon for as many of the characters as I could, not just Team Free Will 2.0 + Eileen (although those five all definitely got the endings they deserved, too!). 

Romance-wise, the following ships got at least one work featuring that ship as the sole/primary one: Destiel, Saileen, Midam, Dreamhunter, Dodio, AU Charlie/Stevie, Amara/Rowena. 

Individual character/platonic pair-wise, here are the characters who got at least one work featuring them as the primary character(s): Alex Jones, Bela Talbot, Becky Rosen, Benny Lafitte & Emma Winchester, Bobby Singer & Rufus Turner, Cas & Claire Novak, Cas & Jack Kline, Jack Kline & Amara, Jack & Kelly Kline, Donatello Redfield, Gabriel & Meg, Gadreel, Kaia Nieves, Kevin & Linda Tran, Miracle the Dog. 

(Crowley is also getting his happy ending, but what was supposed to be a short fic is currently at about 10k, so I’ve split that off into a separate project that will be up within a few weeks.) 

Lastly, some honorable mentions/characters that got their happy endings in minor roles in other fics: Alicia & Max Banes, Aaron Bass, AU Bobby Singer, Ellen & Jo Harvelle & Ash, Jenny the Vampire (well...not happy for her: I managed to kill her off twice in two separate fics and in ways that were infinitely more satisfying than in canon and was very happy about it 😄).

All fics are canonverse fix-its and are listed below the cut, grouped roughly by primary ship/featured character(s) and with summaries, approximate word counts, and links to Ao3 when cross-posting occurred. 

I hope these bring as much closure to those who read them as they did to me while I wrote them, and if they make you feel any sort of way, I’d love to hear about it via likes/comments/reblogs/asks! 💙

Begin and End There [T, ~5.5k words, Cas & Jack, Destiel]

After the Empty takes him, Castiel wakes up in the last place he expected, with a second chance at happiness when he reunites with Dean and the latter finally gets to speak his truth. (read on Ao3 or tumblr [part 1] [part 2])

Let’s Misbehave [G, ~600 words, Destiel]

They finally listen to the mixtape and dance. That’s it, that’s the fic. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

Cas, Not Castiel [G, ~225 words, Destiel]

Another angel, Hester, had once bitterly remarked that Castiel was lost the moment he laid a hand on Dean in Hell. Years later, after all was said and done, Cas found that he agreed. (read on tumblr)

The Dead Man Lives, Carry On [T, ~1.3k words, Dean Winchester & Dean Winchester, background implied Destiel]

It’s one thing to tell yourself you’re bi. It’s a whole other thing to involve time travel. Then again, when has Dean Winchester ever done things the easy way? OR, the one in which a certain side character from season 1 gets dead a whole heck of a lot sooner. You’re welcome. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

From Heaven With Love [G, ~500 words, Cas & Claire]

During the first Christmas following Chuck's defeat, Castiel surprises Claire with a letter from her parents.  (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

Home Is Where the Love Is [G, ~350 words, background Destiel, background Saileen]

Miracle POV, in which Miracle reflects on his new home/family. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

Namesake [G, ~600 words, Destiel, background Saileen]

When Sam and Eileen first tell Dean they want to name their unborn son after him, Dean's reaction is one of shock. He plays it off with a joke, though. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

Clear As Day [T, ~700 words, Saileen]

Newly returned to existence thanks to Jack, Eileen reunites with Sam; OR, the Saileen reunion we were denied in 15x20. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

It Takes a Village [G, ~300 words, Saileen]

Expecting their first child, Sam and Eileen talk about becoming parents. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

Of Love and Loss (and Love) [T, ~350 words, Sam/every canon relationship he’s had w/ endgame Saileen]

For a long time, Sam thought he was done with love. (read on tumblr)

Mother of God [G, ~225 words, Jack & Kelly Kline]

After reuniting his angel dad with his two human dads and rebuilding Heaven, the first thing Jack did was visit his mom. (read on tumblr)

The Happiest Place on Earth [G, ~150 words, Jack & Amara]

In which Amara finally gets to bond with her great-nephew...at Disneyland! :D (read on tumblr)

Good Tidings We Bring [G, ~450 words, Donatello, Jack & Amara]

In which Amara returns Donatello's soul...for Christmas! :D (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

Et Nos Cedamus Amori [M, ~550 words, Amara/Rowena]

Rowena wore the crown like she was born to it, and Amara had to admit, it looked good on her. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

What We Deserve [T, ~2.6k words, Midam]

After helping the Winchesters defeat Chuck, Michael avoids Adam until one day, Adam seeks him out; OR, the soft epilogue these two deserved, damn it. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

With Every Fiber of My Being [T, ~900 words, Midam]

After defeating Chuck, Michael and Adam choose each other. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

Tender Loving Care [G, ~250 words, Dreamhunter]

Kaia's flu is nothing serious, but that doesn't stop Claire from doting on her.  (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

An Angel and a Demon Walk Into a Bar [T, ~2.1k, Gabriel & Meg]

After escaping from the Empty, Gabriel wanders into a bar, where it turns out he’s not the only one back from the dead. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

Rebar Not Included [T, ~1.5k words, Dodio, background Destiel]

Jody and Donna help out the Winchesters by looking into an Ohio case involving masked vampires, and what do you know: not only do they manage to kill a certain side character from season 1 but they ALSO make it through without dying! Oh, and they kiss, just because they can. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

Heal [T, ~1.1k words, Charlie/Stevie]

Charlie’s being distant, and Stevie doesn’t understand why. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

Homecoming [T, ~500 words, Kevin & Linda Tran]

In which Kevin Tran gets the happy ending he deserved. (read on tumblr)

When Life Imitates Art [G, ~500 words, Becky Rosen]

Becky starts a new job as a staff writer for HBO's upcoming adaptation of the Supernatural book series. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

Family Don’t End in Blood [T, ~300 words, Alex & Wayward Sisters]

A decade ago, if someone had asked Alex what family meant, she would have said blood and believed it. (read on tumblr)

Home [T, ~300 words, Kaia & Wayward Sisters]

In which Kaia finally has a home. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

The Golden Years [G, ~600 words, Bobby & Rufus, implied Bobby/Ellen]

In which, now that Bobby’s finally enjoying retirement in the new Heaven, he’d really like to just forget about that one time he kissed Crowley. Unfortunately for him, Rufus has other plans. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

Be at Peace [G, ~600 words, Gadreel, background Gadreel/OFC]

In which Gadreel escapes the Empty and gets a soft epilogue. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

Well Met [G, ~200 words, Benny & Emma]

In hindsight, faking his own death is the best thing Benny’s ever done. (read on tumblr)

The Right Hand [T, ~175 words, Bela Talbot]

Some closure for Bela Talbot, anyone? (read on tumblr)

Screw Sad Finales: Here’s to Victory Parties! [G, ~350 words, Gen with a few non-TFW background ships hinted]

After defeating Chuck, Sam and Dean throw a party! With appearances by Cas, Eileen, Jack, the Wayward Sisters, Adam and Michael, Charlie and Stevie, Kevin and Linda Tran, Rowena, Amara, Garth and his family, Bobby, Max and Alicia Banes, and Aaron Bass. (read on Ao3 or tumblr)

[gigasonickickflip]

★

alright i have to admit, this one is a toughie. so lets just dive into it

despite literally everything about dave as a person seeming like he'd be completely incompatible with someone like amanda, through dumb luck, bad jokes, and sheer force of will hes accidentally created one of the closest friendships hes ever had, and that alone is enough to wig him out of thinking about their relationship too much. but when he does, it usually breaks down like this:

talking to strange people on the internet seems to break good once in a while, since he definitely started talking to her out of boredom and curiosity. who is this y2k-era edgelord? why is she on tumblr? what's the deal with the pig thing? it was curiosity at first, a form of escapism from his increasingly upsetting life, that spiraled into something way more. turns out the funny edgelord is actually packing a huge tragic backstory, a good sense of humor, and an existentially horrifying circumstance with an elder god. that was enough to turn this from joke to real. and then when it got real, it got real in a hurry

so, dave is an incredibly emotionally repressed person, in the same way any person that thinks "vulnerability = getting your ass kicked" tends to be. there are people thatve known dave for years that know less about him than amanda has learned in a few months, and honestly? its entirely because shes 10x worse at emotions than he is. the easiest way for him to bond with someone is through banter and, by extension, him fucking with them, and seeing someone seem so avoidant of getting vulnerable like that meant that he felt pretty comfortable doing it for the bit. plus, there was something extremely relatable about it, since he also had to be "socialized" like this once he moved out of the system. sure, he isnt the best at taking his own advice, but he's heard all of this stuff from his friends. about trusting people, and understanding that not everyone wants to hurt you, and knowing how to put yourself out there. all of that stuff

the fact that it was mixed with jokes made it way easier for both of them, he figures, since thats really all he knows how to do when it comes to socializing anyway. the fact that she was receptive to him fucking with her in the first place was surprising, when she started doing it back it was downright delightful, and somehow it was much easier to transition from jokey banter to serious conversations. felt decently natural, honestly, and thats what weirds himself out the most about it. no matter how weird and different their circumstances are, theyre on a very similar wavelength with discussing and contextualizing their problems, which is to say that they either avoid it until it kills them or turns it into some dumb overwrought joke. and the tendency for them to call each other out on doing both of those things turned it into a system of mutual responsibility, instead of like, living with a therapist that psychoanalyzes you every morning.

eventually though, the whole amanda thing started getting him in his feelings in a way he didnt really know how to handle. heres someone with a way rougher life than him, screwed over by people over and over again, and he feels this deep existential dread realizing that an incredibly fun and pleasant person can be used like that! and hurt like that! and killed like that! honestly he can't even wrap his head around the idea of her being party to murder because he can't see her as anything but a horrifying sample case of "the universe is a shitty place that screws people over with forces outside their control," and he really doesn't know how to handle it. the addiction/self-destructive tendency thing really hits him in the sister issues, too, and he cant really figure out what to do to help, yet he still gets an overwhelming need to help. so he keeps up with the jokes and the bullshit and asks her to hang and tries to introduce her to shit that makes him happy in the hopes that itll make her happy

and it isnt entirely pity, and it isnt entirely charity, because he really does enjoy her company. shes like, his current closest friend (not counting rose), and all of the "helping" at some point became mutually beneficial in the sense that he has a friend that he can hang around with and enjoy life with through a new pair of eyes. one of his favorite things to do is to show her dumb shit that happened after she died, because she'll either hate it or love it, and both are great for him. its that sort of stuff that makes him feel, even if he'd never say it to her face, that hes actually extremely grateful that she got nabbed by an evil spider god. he doesnt know what he'd be doing without her and he has to imagine that her life is similarly improved by her cosmic murder jail.

so its a lot of good vibes, mixed with a decent amount of existential dread from her circumstances. the idea of an unstoppable deity being whats stopping your friend from just living in your apartment is one of those things that makes him want to tear his hair out, but it does feel pretty good to know that someone out there understands his current war against the cosmos and destiny and gods or whatever. and honestly? hes at the point where he feels like she gets him so much that hes worried about being too overwhelming. asking to hang out too much or getting too affectionate which are issues he almost never gets. so he gives her space and tries not to scare her off and instead does dumb shit like giving her house keys and becoming sworn brothers or whatever. hed pretty much die or kill for her and the fact that she refuses to ask him for anything makes him feel like a huge loser for even thinking that.

[satorugojjo]

Hey, I just finished reading the percy jackson (pjo) series and I'm wondering if I should bother reading the rest of the books (the heroes of olympus etc.). I enjoyed pjo, but one of the reasons I started reading the series was that I heard it had good POC rep (especially in the later books), but after following your blog it seems like it doesn't? And that the books are actually kind of racist? So as someone looking for POC rep should I continue with the series?

this is a really difficult question to answer and I’ll try my best to give you my opinion.

I think the short answer is they’re definitely worth reading. A real life friend asked me if they’re worth, I said yes despite the flaws and she agreed at the end saying that it really could have been better, some bits were very yikes but it was still enjoyable as a whole.

There is a lot of critique towards HOO and it’s rightly deserved but as a fan of the original series I still liked having the world extended for me. The new characters and the introduction of many new elements (Rome etc) is one of the best things and Rick may have been well intentioned on including diversity but his treatment of POC was not executed properly. There was very poor research into some of them and it was evident that many elements were added as an afterthought or at a surface level (especially Piper’s culture and tradition). I would say Leo and Reyna were better written (Leo’s story tanked but for other reasons).

Racist is a strong word and I’m not gonna tell you whether it’s right or wrong as many people have different opinions. I’ll leave it to you to make your own judgements on POC rep. My opinion is always authors who have a large fan base and a young following should always put in the effort to research everything they do, and the fact Rick didn’t seem to do that or apply any critical thinking to his own books disappointed me. However, I would have disliked it more if there wasn’t ANY representation but that’s after being in the fandom for a few years and allowing the characters to grow in my head which I do project back onto the canon material. I think he is well intentioned with representation and he does some better than others but I don’t think he gets a pass just because he means well. He should know better. Some things don’t sit right, some things are plain ass wrong, and some things are really well written so I’m really conflicted on the whole thing.

Plot is a different thing, I think towards the end of the series the plot starts getting a little weirder and holey but again the journey was still really good for me. There are definitely a lot of flaws but I would say until about the 4th book, I was highly enjoying reading them because there was more excellent bits than bad ones and I think you wouldn’t really notice how the quality changes or what the potential could have been until you finish the 5th book. I still had lots of hope at the end of House of Hades and it was only Blood of Olympus I really strongly disliked.

I would read them because they’re still good books, they’re nowhere as coherent and well thought out as the first set, but I love the character dynamics and some of the POC rep (definitely not all of it). You will be disappointed by the last one but I still think the journey is worth it and the world is still magical with lots of good mythology.

If it wasn’t for tumblr and if it wasn’t for my deep love for Percy Jackson and the whole world, I wouldn’t have noticed all the critiques of HOO as a regular average reader. Some are glaring but keep in mind that regular readers don’t go that deep into book analysis so the things you read on our blogs are definitely ruminated after a few readings and community discourse. Also feedback from the fandom is that Rick does do representation for dyslexia, ADHD, deaf community and more pretty well.

Read them because no matter what the flaws are, it will leave you with a much larger world, characters you will fall in love with, and a sense of enjoyment and fulfilment knowing that even though Rick screwed up by not leveraging on the potential, you’ll be left with elements that you will love and cherish and scenes that will stay with your forever amidst the ones that you don’t like. And if anything, the PJO fandom is huge on tumblr and you’ll be able to find a home here 💙 sorry if this wasn’t much help but it’s a loaded question.

[mamahanu]

Damn, I wanted to insert text for the "500 words or less" fanfic ask but unfortunately Tumblr doesn't allow for that many words in an ask. Which is honestly just one of MANY fucked up things about Tumblr... Anyway it's for your story, Omertà, and is in chapter 25 halfway through - approx a 500 word segment starting with, “Shit!” Tony exclaimed, tone the complete opposite of Friday’s calm voice. “Shit, okay. Friday, can we move him?”

Curse you, Tumblr! Never fear, @dragonnan. I know the passage you’re talking about. :-) Omertà consumed me for many, many months, and I still think about it, even though it’s complete. My commentary will be in (bold.) 

“Shit!” Tony exclaimed, tone the complete opposite of Friday’s calm voice. “Shit, okay. Friday, can we move him?”

(The thing about Tony right now is he’s panicking. And prior to this he has been building up his panic reserves for days. The last time he actually saw Peter, he yelled at him and took his suit back. The reaction Peter gave him was not what he expected. His original reaction was one of the most hated moments in Homecoming for me. It made no sense. Peter doesn’t do what he does because of a fancy suit. He does it because it’s the right thing to do. Therefore, he reacted accordingly in my fic, and now Tony has a better understanding of what makes Peter tick. He’s been worrying and fretting about Peter getting into all kinds of trouble, and now it’s like a nightmare come to life, seeing Peter so injured.)

“Excuse me,” the woman said, standing up, “I am a nurse, and it would be very unsafe to move him without the correct equipment and without know the extent of his injuries—” (So this, this right here, is Claire being a BAMF. I’ve not known her to take any shit in any of the Netflix Marvel stuff I’ve seen, so she’s not taking any from Iron Man either. She is a delight, and underappreciated.) 

“Claire,” the man behind him said, “he’s got an artificial intelligence that probably just read off the injuries to him.” (probably, Matt? come on. Everyone and their dog knows you can hear it.)The woman crouched down again next to Peter, checking his pulse and muttering something very vulgar about her companion.

(I LOVE Claire. I love her and Matt and how they interact. I love her in Luke Cage. I just love her. She has no powers. She gets in terrifying, life-threatening situations and she still helps the supers. Because she knows no one else will do it, and they need her. She takes the Night Nurse gig very seriously. I knew in my heart of hearts that if Matt had come across Peter this injured, the first thing he’d do is call Claire.)

“Analyzing,” Friday said as Tony shushed the others. He heard footsteps and turned, seeing the masked man walking up to them. He held out his hands in a peaceful gesture.

“Mr. Stark,” he said, calmly. “There are some things I think you need to know—”

“Did you have anything to do with this?” Tony snarled.(So I really enjoyed writing this. This is Tony’s go-to Dad mode for me, at least when Peter’s hurt. All snarl and bite.)

The vigilante sighed heavily. “An associate of mine brought him to me, after a request of an associate of his.” (I.. worked this about 10,000 times to try to make it less confusing. And I didn’t like any of my solutions. So... it stayed the same. I was displeased.)

“Well that’s not vague and confusing at all,” Tony said, sarcastically.(Tony was also displeased.)

“This is a different world. We aren’t all Iron Man. Most of us don’t have the protection of billions of dollars, and even some of the best lawyers would have a hard time picking apart those Accords, despite how unconstitutional they are,” the other man snapped back. (Speaking from experience there, Matt?) “So forgive me for protecting the identities of those who would be quick to suffer Secretary Ross’s wrath.” (So for those of you who read this fic this far, the anti-accords speech is nothing new. Peter was spouting it. MJ was spouting it. Everyone who is enhanced in my fics do not like the Accords. As they are horrible and nothing good can come from them. Tony spent a good amount of time in the background learning some things about his guilt-ridden support of them. I’ve said this many times: Steve didn’t have to do him like that. But Tony wasn’t in the right, either.)

“Not you, too!” Tony yelled. “Look, I’m doing my best with them, okay? Nobody is going to be sent to any kind of prison until they make more sense. I’ve got mutants in high places looking them over—”

“Enhanced peoples,” the masked man corrected. Tony rolled his eyes. “Does Spidey know that no one is going to be imprisoned until they’re sorted?” he pressed. (I really like Big Brother Matt, too. I am in full support of more representation of this.) 

Tony paused. “Why—well, I mean, he’s asked and I’ve told him not to worry. But it doesn’t matter. He stops bike thieves, for God’s sake—” (The fact that Tony found him going after alien weapons’ dealers and holding together a Ferry still will not sway him from the idea that Peter only gives directions to the Churro lady.)

“He’s in something way over his head, and has been for almost a year now, if I figured out the timing right,” the masked man interrupted. (Matt is incredibly perceptive. From the moment he met Peter as Spider-Man, he knew who he was, and what he was doing. He just didn’t know the name of his employer. Peter... was in WAY over his head, and had been burned so badly by Fisk he didn’t trust anyone to help him out of it.)

“Mike,” the woman from the floor called. “Don’t be an asshole. Stark needs you to get the point.”

“Boss,” Friday chimed in. Tony held up a finger for silence. “I do not detect any fractures in Peter’s neck or possibility of damage to his spinal cord if he’s moved. As long as he is kept fairly still, it should be safe.” (I made this up. I did not google this. I took what I remembered from First Aid and hoped for the best. @kitcat992 can school me later. XD)

“Send out Mark XLII. When it gets here, we’ll load him in. Also, call Cho. Let her know we need her at the Tower ASAP.” (So, to be honest, I’m pretty sure Tony would say ‘screw it’ and throw Peter over his shoulder. But I cringed at him doing that. I thought it was a better idea for him to get one of his suits, considering the extent of Peter’s injuries.) Tony was glad he held off on actually putting the building up sale until after he started moving everything over. There was still an active medical wing there. Tony hadn’t moved the equipment or beds. He told Pepper it was because he wanted to add a certain usefulness to the aesthetic of the place for potential buyers. He was pretty sure she knew he was keeping them there in case of a spider-related emergency. (I, as the author, knew there was medical stuff in the tower. I also hadn’t said there was medical stuff in the tower prior to this point. So I just... blurted it out in a blurb here. If I ever go back and edit this, I will be sure to layer that in in previous chapters.) “Also, tell her we need the fancy meds that we use on Steve, alright?”

“Got it.”

Voila! I hope that proved satisfactory, my friend, and I’m sorry it took so long to answer! 

Fanfic Directors Cut: ask me anything. 

[autumn-foxfire]

Well since tumblr was kind enough to refresh and delete my ask before I could send it, here's a poorly rewriten and sorta salty version of it. changed a bit. Now on one hand, I lowkey want the blame to fall on Hawks. Doesn't need to be wide-scale, at least someone trying to pin the blame on him is fine. Angst, and other reasons. If Endeavor, like you say tries to defend him then cool. But let's see how well his own reputation fares by the end of this. (1)

On the other, kinda hard to picture things going back to normal after this y'know?Consequences galore, you don't get to have a situation this big then go back to regular schools days and not see an impact on society. Heroes died, some are crippled and who knows if Hawks' wings are gonna grow back. The League turned PLF threat is massive, the amount of supporters, the unease and unrest of the public. Since I've already accepted the wing situation, congrats your No.2 is out of the rankings. (2)

Though I always doubted we'd get another of those. This was never gonna turn out well ever since MVA ended. Sure we could have hoped, but for changes to come there needs to be a fallout of some sort. And nothing is changing in this society if they don't get torn down a bit. And yes, I know the 'League aren't revolutionists' argument, but their chaotic actions will drive the story and change its tone a lot. (3)

All Hori said was that he still had plans for him on moving the story forward and places to go and I can't figure out what the heck that means and this untranslated interview supposedly happened between EA and PLW arcs. And sure, getting knocked out by falling from a balcony is very much progress ain't it. Lmao, nah. So what else is left??? *side-eyes the redacted reveal* I sincerely hope Hawks doesn't actually screw over Hero society with what he does next. (5)

First thing first, I’m sorry about Tumblr messing you the first time and now again considering I’m missing paragraph 4...

I think it’s unfair to pin all the blame on Hawks. Hawks is one man assigned a mission that realistically required a team. He was undercover for months in enemy territory and was under constant surveillance and still he not only managed to uncover the plans the PLF had made, he also managed to make a comprehensive list of everyone residing in the villa, other members of the PLF and found the location of Shigaraki without drawing anyone’s (except Dabi’s but he already knew so whatever) suspicion. 

Hawks got everything the heroes could have possibly needed and he took down one of the biggest labelled threats in the raid. He’s currently the only hero to have done so. The failure of this raid I would blame on poor planning (I could rant for days the teams that were assigned) by the hero side, something Hawks wouldn’t have been involved in to begin with because he was still undercover, and poor luck (Shigaraki’s heart restarting). The heroes were winning, it was even acknowledged by Shigaraki himself.

However, if (or when by the looks of it) this raid does end up in failure with even more hero and hero student death, I could see the hero commission and the public turning on Hawks because he was the face of this mission. It’s the training camp arc all over again except with Hawks instead of Eraserhead. Just like then, Hawks did everything he could but they still failed and the general public does like holding someone responsible.

Hero society will change after this but not for the better. There will be more distrust in the heroes to start with, considering how many of them were killed and the use of the students might cause outrage too.

I’ve never said that the league’s actions won’t change society, I’ve just made it clear that what they personally aim for is not changing society for the better. The PLF are filled with quirk supremacists who want the strong to live and the weak to die (Geten made that clear and considering he was raised by the MLA, I’m sure that’s a sentiment that is in many in the PLF). They basically want to plunge the world back into the dark ages that were around when AfO was the king of the underworld.

Also to ignore that the heroes aren’t aware about how toxic hero society is, is also ignoring all the scenes where discrimination and/or unjust behavior has been brought to focus (Deku’s quirklessness at the start, Shinsou during the sports festival, Aizawa bring to light about how impractical he thinks the exams are, Hawks discussing how he one day dreams for a day when Heroes aren’t needed, Hawks questioning his orders by the HPSC and then defying them). Who knows, even without the villains they could have been the change they needed to.

(Violence isn’t the only way to make a change after all, some of the biggest changes have been made by peaceful protests and bringing to light the corrupt behaviour of the organisations that we’re supposed to trust)

I’m sorry but your 4th paragraph was lost but I assume it had something to do with Hawks considering your 5th paragraph so I’ll just answer that.

I’m not sure exactly what interview you’re talking about. I don’t really keep up with them and I’m not really active on Twitter either. I don’t think Hawks is going to ‘screw over the hero society’ with the knowledge of Dabi. Actually I think he might do the opposite, talk with Endeavor and fact check before he does anything that could compromise society because he’s not really a man that acts on pure emotion. (Also, dude, what’s with the dig towards his injury? I don’t get it?)

[dukereviewsmovies]

Duke Reviews: The Fast And The Furious

Hi Everyone, I'm Andrew Leduc And Welcome To Duke Reviews, Where I Realize That It's Been A While, I Know I Haven't Done Anything With This Page In A While (Mainly Because Of My Other Tumblr Pages And For Those I Suggest You Check Out Power Rangers/Sentai Reviews (prreviews) Duke Reviews TV (dukereviewstv) Oncer Reviews (oncerreviews) And Arrowverse Reviews (arrowversereviews)) But I Hope To Do More Because As Of Today I Am Back With New Reviews On The Fast And Furious Movies...

I Say The Fast And Furious Movies As I'm Going To Be Going Over All Of Them And Not Just Do 4 Movies And Make A Month Out Of It, That Made Me Feel Compressed For Time And I Really Don't Want To Feel Like That When Doing This, I'm Gonna Do This The Way I Want To. So, The Fast And The Furious...

Starring Vin Diesel And The Late Paul Walker This Film...Well, I Would Talk About The Plot But That Would Spoil Some Twists That Happens In The Movie So, No Plot For This Episode...

But Instead Let's Get Right To The Fast And The Furious...

The Film Starts As Some People With Helmets And Fast Cars Hijack A Truck Full Of Electronic Goods...

The Next Morning, We Meet Brian Spillner (Played By The Late Paul Walker) Who Stops By Toretto's Market And Cafe Where Mia (Played By Dallas' Jordana Brewster) Works With Her Brother, Dom (Played By Vin Diesel) But When Dom's Crew (Which Includes Dom's Longtime Girlfriend, Letty (Played By Lost's Michelle Rodriguez) Vince (Played By Matt Shultze) Who Is Sort Of The Muscle, Jesse (Played By Chad Lindberg) Who's The Brains And Leon (Played By Johnny Strong) Who's Just There, He's Not The Brains Or The Muscle, He's Just There) Arrives On The Scene, Vince Gets Into A Fight With Brian (When He Doesn't Like Brian Flirting With Mia) Which Forces Dom To Get Involved...

What Kind Of Fight Song Is That?

That's Got To Be The Worst Song I've Ever Heard In A Fight Scene...

Telling Brian To Never Come Back Here, Brian Says That That's Bull But Knowing That Brian Works An Autoshop With A Friend Of His Named Harry, Dom Tells Brian That He's Fired. Going Down To Harry's, He's Mad At Brian, Saying That He's Messing Around With His Buisness...

He's Good, Man! Really Good...

Telling Harry, He Needs Nos...

Nos? What's Nos?

Researching This I Discovered That Nos Is Another Word For Nitrous Oxide Otherwise Known As Laughing Gas...

However, It Is Used In This And Other Motor Sports As A Rocket Propellant...

However, Harry Knows That Brian Is A Amateur And Isn't Ready For Nos Just Yet But Needing It Now Brian Tells Harry To Place 2 Containers In His Vehicle. That Night, Brian Goes To A Street Race That He Knows That Dom And His Crew Will Be At There He Meets Edwin (Played By Rapper Ja Rule) And Hector (Played By That One Guy Who's Known For Playing Mexican Gangsters In Movies) I'm Serious That's All He's Known For, But I Guess It's Better Than Saying The Guy That Got A Monkey Out Of His Ass In Bruce Almighty...

(Start Video At 1:06)

When Dom Arrives, Everyone Places Their Cash In Except For Brian Who Places The Pink Slip To His Car, Stating That If He Wins He Takes The Cash And The Respect...

Looking At His Car, Dom Accepts His Terms As They All Drive To Where The Race Is At.

With All The Racers At The Starting Line, The Race Begins!..

Activating The First Nos Canister, Brian Passes Edwin And Another Racer But When He Activates The Second Canister, He Loses The Bottom Of The Back Of His Car As He Passes Dom, But Dom Gets The Better Of Brian By Activating His Nos Canister...

But As Brian Finally Makes It To The Finish Line, The Police Start Showing Up Which Causes Everyone To Get The Hell Outta There, Ditching His Car, Dom Is Nearly Arrested By Police, However He Is Saved By Brian Who Says He Only Saved Him In An Effort To Keep His Car...

Losing The Police, Dom Tells Brian He Had Jesse Do Research On Him Discovering That Brian Did 2 Years In Juvie For Boosting Cars...

But They're Soon Followed By A Rival Gang On Motorbikes With Machine Guns That Is Led ByJohnny Tran (Played By Rick Yune) And His Cousin, Lance (Played By Grimm's Reggie Lee)

Saying That They Just Got Lost, Tran Lets Dom Go However...

They Place Bullets In Brian's Car, Setting The Nos On Fire And Causing The Car To Blow Up...

With A Long Walk Home, Dom Explains His History With Tran To Brian, As It Turns Out That It Was A Buisness Deal That Went Sour, Plus He Slept With Tran's Sister

Arriving At Dom's House, Dom Tells Brian To Come In For A Drink Before He Gets Mad At His Crew For Not Going Out And Finding Him...

With Dom Going Upstairs With Letty To Give Her A Massage Which Is Code For...

Saving Brian From Another Fight With Vince, Mia Talks With Brian In The Kitchen...

The Next Day, Brian Is Arrested By Police And Is Taken Back To A Safehouse Where It's Revealed That Everything We Know About Brian Is A Lie!

Turns Out His Real Name Is Brian O'Connor And He Is An LAPD Officer Who Is Involved In A Joint Mission Between The LAPD And The FBI To Find Out Who The Gang That Has Been Stealing Electronic Goods Is And To Arrest Them

The Officer That Arrested Him Is Sergeant Tanner (Played By Ted Levine Who Played The...

Guy In Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom) And Is The LAPD Officer In Charge Of The Mission And The Black Guy Is The FBI Agent Bilkins (Played By Thom Barry) Who I Suggest You Get Used To Seeing As He's In The Next Movie As Well...

They Go Over A Bit Of Exposition Stating That People That Are Good With Precision Driving With Three Honda Civics With Green Neon Glow Beneath The Chassis And Have Mashimoto Z-X Tires Have Done 4 Truck Hijackings In 2 Months And If They Don't Have Something Soon They'll Have A Revolt Of Truckers On Their Hands...

But Despite Knowing That The Street Racing World Revolves Around Dom, Brian Doesn't Think That He's The One Behind These Attacks But He May Know Who Does All He Needs Is Time...

But Bilkins Says That Brian Doesn't Have Time...

Before Brian Leaves, Tanner Warns Brian To Be Careful Around Dom As He Nearly Beat A Guy To Death...

Getting Another Car From Tanner..,

And A Shitty One At That...

He Gives It To Dom Saying It's His Car...

Telling Jesse To Pop The Hood, Shows Dom To Not Judge A Book By It's Cover...

Dom Tells Brian That When He's Not Working At Harry's, He's Working At His Garage...

We Get A Brief Montage Of Dom And The Crew Buying Stuff From Harry's For The Car, While Jesse Shows Brian What The Car Will Look Like When The Car Is Finished...

Going To A Barbecue At Dom's House, Vince Takes Off The Minute He Sees Brian But Let's Not Put A Damper On This Scene As Everyone Sits Down To Eat We See One Of Dom's Traditions Which Is Whenever Somebody Grabs Food First That Somebody Has To Say Grace...

Just They Eat, Vince Arrives Mainly Because He's Hungry And Not Because He's Dropped His Beef With Brian...

Helping Mia With The Kitchen, Brian Asks Mia Out But Despite Her Saying She Doesn't Go Out With Her Brother's Friends She Does This When Vince Bosses Around Brian Again...

The Next Day, Hector Visits Harry's Shop For Equipment For 3 Honda Civics...

This Is Starting To Get Suspicious...

That Night, Brian Sneaks To Hector's Hangout Over Near The El Gato But Unfortunately The Cars Don't Match The Description. Getting Out, He Is Caught By Vince Who Takes Him To Dom Who Demands An Explanation Which Is Where Brian Tells Him That He Was Only In Hector's Garage To Analyze The Competition For The Upcoming Race Wars...

Despite Vince Believing He's A Cop, Dom Takes Both Brian And Vince To Johnny Tran's Where Dom And Vince Look At Tran's Car To See That It Has No Engine But Brian Is More Interested In All The Electronics That Tran Has...

But They Get A Call From Jesse Who Says That Tran And His Gang Are On Their Way Back A Fence Named Ted Who Was Supposed To Get Them An Engine For Their Car But He Didn't So They Decide To Torture Him...

Telling Tanner And Billkins What He Saw, Billkins Wants To Move On Tran Believing That They Have Enough But Brian Wants Hard Evidence Before They Do...

He Also Mentions That Hector's A Dead End And Dom Is Too Controlled For This, Vince Maybe But Not Dom, This Leads Tanner To Show Brian A Picture Of The Guy Dom Beat Up Years Ago...

That Afternoon, Brian Works At The Garage With Dom As He Tells Him That Tonight Is His Date With Mia...

Wow, Not One For Subtlety, Are You Dom?

Taking Brian To His Garage At His House, Dom Shows Brian A 1970 Dodge Charger That He Worked On With His Father When He Was A Kid, It's Here We Learn That Dominic's Father (Who Was A Pro Stock Racer) Was Killed By A Fellow Racer Named Kenny Linder Who Knocked Into A Wall (Which Set His Car On Fire) And That The Man That Dom Attacked Was Linder Which Leads To The Best Line Of The Entire Movie...

Taking Mia Out, She Tells Brian The Story How How Dom And The Gang Met, Saying That Vince Knew Dom Since They Were Kids And Letty Was Basically The Girl Next Door Who Was Interested In Car But Could Never Get Dom's Attention But Then She Turned 16...

So, Their Relationship Is Basically Like Phineas And Isabella's...

And Jesse And Leon Just Showed Up One Night And Never Ever Left. Mia Then Compares Her Brother To Gravity Stating That Everyone Who Comes Around Him Gets Pulled In, But Brian Tells Mia That The Only Thing That Pulled Him In Was Her...

Meanwhile, Another Heist Goes Down Which Makes Bilkins Decide To Move On Tran In 1700 Hours, And They Let Brian Know About This As He's Screwing Mia...

Bad Timing, Guys...

The Arrest Of Tran And His Boys Looks Similar To The Baptism Scene In The Godfather To The Point That All That's Missing Is The Murders And It Could Use A Guy With A Horse Head On His Bed...

And If You Thought Brian Having Sex With Mia Was Hot During The Raid We Get Scenes Of Dom Having Sex With Letty, She Was Hot In Girlfight So Why Not?

However, Tran And His Boys Are Innocent, Turns Out The Electronics Are Legal And All They Got On Them Is Low Rent Weapons Charges And Outstanding Speeding Tickets, Bilkins Tells Brian To Bring Toretto In In 36 Hours Or He Can Get A New Job.

Knowing That Brian Can't Look Past Dom Because Of Mia, Brian Tells Tanner That Knows Dom Won't Go Back To Jail Easy...

With The Car Ready And Raring To Go, Dom And Brian To A Test Run Down To The Coast Where They Stop By This Restaurant Called Neptune's Her Where Brian Tells Dom That He Knows He's Doing Something On The Side To Pay For Everything And He Wants In, Dom Tells Brian To Win Race Wars Then They'll Talk...

And What Can I Say About Race Wars? It's A Mix Of Woodstock And Coachella Except No Music Just Racing...

With Letty Racing First, She Beats The Hell Out Of This Ass That Tried To Hit On Her...

You Just Got Owned, Pal...

Meeting With Brian, Jesse Tells Him That He's Up Next In A Pink Slip Race, That Is The Good News, The Bad News Is That He's Driving His Jailbird Dad's Jetta And That His Competitor Is Johnny Tran....

Can't Wait To See How This Goes Down...

Yep, Jesse Loses But He's Like No Way In Hell I'm Giving Up My Dad's Car And Drives Off Til He's Out Of Fuel...

I Have A Feeling We Won't Be Seeing Him For A While...

Telling Dom To Get Jesse's Car For Him, Dom Tells Tran To Watch Who He's Talking To Which Is When Tran Tells Him That S.W.A.T Raided His House...

Shermar Moore Was At Your House, Boy, I Wish I Was There...

Thinking That Dom Was Behind It, Dom Gets Into A Fight With Tran...

That Night, Brian Watches Dom And The Others Take Off To Go On Another Heist Which Leads Brian To Confront Mia On It Forcing Him To Tell Her That He's A Cop..

(Start At 3:41 And End At 3:44)

Despite Telling Her That Everything He Felt For Mia Was Real, Brian Tells Her That The Truckers Aren't Laying Down Anymore And That If She Cares About Dom And The Crew She'll Help Him...

Mia Tells Brian Where The Cats Are Stashed But Brian Knows That The Highway Where They Are Is Too Well Patrolled So, He Decides To Do A Cell Phone Trace...

Driving Up To The Cars, Dom's Ready To Go But The Others Don't Feel Right Doing This Without Jesse But Dom Doesn't Want To Give Up On This One Saying That It's The Motherlode That They've Been Waiting For. So, Getting In The Cars They Ride Off...

But As They Go To Pull Their Heist, The Driver Tries To Shoot Vince With A Shotgun Vince Tries To Untether But He's Just Stuck...

Eventually Though Vince Gets Tossed To The Side Where His Arm Gets Stuck, Dom And Letty Try To Save Him But Dom Loses A Tire And Letty Gets Sideswiped Off The Road With Dom Telling Leon To Go Check On Her...

Dom's Engine Gets Hit Causing Him To Pull Off The Road But Luckily Brian Arrives With Mia To Save Vince...

With Dom Arriving, Letty And Leon Drive Out Of This Movie And With Only Letty And Vince Returning For Sequels We Say Goodbye To Leon. We Hardly Knew Ye...

With Vince Bleeding Out, Brian Calls The Police To Bring An Ambulance While Also Blowing His Cover. Returning To Dom's House, Brian Confronts Dom Saying There's Nowhere To Run But Dom Tells Him That He's Not Running Because He Has To Find Jesse Before Tran Does But Luckily Jesse Finds Them...

With Tran And Lance Closing In, Dom, Brian And Mia Take Cover While Tran Kills Jesse...

With Both Dom And Brian Going After Tran, Tran And Brian Both Shoot At Each Other As Lance Goes Behind Brian To Shoot Him But Dom Stops Lance From Doing So By Causing Him To Jump Into A Field...

It All Eventually Ends When Tran Is Shot By Brian Killing Him Instantly. With Tran Dead, Brian Sets His Sights On Dom Who He Follows To A Railroad Track Where Dom Tells Him That He Used To Drag Race Here In High School And That On Green He's Going So, The 2 Decide To Race Each Other One Last Time Or Until Fast And Furious But That's A Different Story...

Jumping At The Track As The Train Is About To Cross, Dom's Charger Gets Hit By An Oncoming Truck Causing To Flip Out Of Control...

Surviving, Brian Lets Dom Take His Car Saying That He Owes Him A 10 Second Car And So Dom Rides Off To Fight Another Day...

And That's The Fast And The Furious And It's A Good Film....

The Cast And Story Are Great, The Stunts Are Fantastic, The Car Designs Are Amazing I Just Love This Series. A lot Of People Around My Mom's Age Say That These Films Are Just Violence , Sex Basically Stuff You Would Find In A Grand Theft Auto Game And While It Does Have Some Violence And A Few Sexy Scenes It's Not Just That Throughout The Entire Movie It's Much More Than That, So, I Say See It And Give It A Chance...

Till Next Time, This Is Duke, Signing Off...

[procrastinating-story-writer]

Bonds that Bind Us

Summary: Odin ordered for Loki to return to Midgard as punishment to atone for what he did in New York and S.H.I.E.LD agreed.

She was not expecting an assignment such as this to fall on her lap but she had nothing better to do. How bad could it be being Loki's warden?

Pairing: Loki x OFC Omidah Penwinkle

Warnings: multiple chapter story, violence, experimentation, language, angst, just to name a few.

A/N: Hello everyone! First off thank you for reading. Now, this story can be found on my AO3 account Onyx_Lenora_Traise and I wanted to post this on Tumblr. Enjoy!

Omidah looked up from the book she was reading when she heard someone call her name. Ever since she agreed (was forced) to live in the Avengers tower, all quiet time and privacy went out the window. She saw her godfather Coulson enter the room, a grim look on his face

(A/N: he's very much alive in this story. Always been one of my favorite characters from Avengers)

"what's wrong? You look real distressed," Coulson sighed and sat next to her, he was not happy with the news he had to tell her but it was Fury's orders

"Fury has assigned you to a mission but I don't think you're going to like it; I sure as hell don't."

Omidah raised an eyebrow, curiosity evident in her eyes, she knew all too well that when her godfather wasn't happy with a mission she had (which was rare), it was dangerous and life threatening and those were the best kind for her.

She giggled, "finally something to do! Please tell me it's really dangerous with lots of fighting,"

Coulson rolled his eyes at her excitement over the matter, she really was a strange young lady.

"Do you remember Thor's brother the infamous Loki?"

"yeah I remember him, how could I not? I nearly whooped his ass when he tried to escape from the helicarrier and I would have succeeded too if I didn't have you to worry about. I still owe him a beating for nearly killing you."

She knew that if Coulson had faced Loki alone that day and gotten the injuries he had without immediate medical assistance, he would have died

"Thor is bringing Loki back here on earth as a punishment from Odin to atone for his actions and he'll be confined to the tower with you as his warden."

Omidah stayed quiet processing the information related to her. She started to laugh. Coulson shot her a confused look.

"Oh my Ra! Do you have any idea how deliciously ironic this is?"

Coulson shivered when his goddaughter cackled (you know that comical laugh in animes when a twisted plan was in place?)

"So when will he be arriving? Where will he be sleeping? I need to prepare....oh my there is so much I need to look after."

Coulson shook his head in disbelief, she was taking this news well, too well for his liking

"Calm down Omidah sheesh, you're behaving like its your long lost friend that's coming for a visit. Why are you so excited anyways?"

She rolled her eyes "It's not everyday you get to meet a Norse god and now I'm gonna know two of them, plus I can finally have questions answered on magic and literature."

"Why can't you just ask Thor about all of that stuff"

"No offense to Thor but he doesn't really know the in-depth knowledge I seek and from what he's told me about his brother, well apart from what I've researched, Loki is like a walking, living fricking Norse encyclopedia. I'm kinda hoping also that he can give me an insight on some of my abilities, still rusty in some aspects.

Coulson give Omidah a have-you-lost-your-marbles-kind of look, she just smiled

"Relax I know what I'm doing, besides he's going to be here for a long time and eventually he will have to talk to someone, so I volunteer as tribute."

"I have to remember to get your brain checked for loose screws"

Omidah faked a gasp and threw a cushion at Coulson making him laugh

"but all jokes aside, I know what I'm getting myself into. The others won't agree with my methods of doing things but I never fail a mission. If Odin is sending Loki here to atone for what he did, he's not going to do so by being distant and locking himself in his assigned room which I have a good feeling he'll do,"

"So what's your game plan then," Coulson asked

"quite simple actually, I'm going to be his friend" she flashed Coulson a smile *any second now 3,2,1.....*

"YOU'RE GOING TO WHAT!?"

.

.

.

.

Sitting in the lounge, Omidah poured over the numerous files sent to her by Fury. The files contained information on the objective of her mission and information on Loki which she didn't need but due to protocol Fury sent them to her anyways.

Getting up and heading to the kitchen, she grabbed a glazed donut and a cup of coffee and headed back to the sofa. She needed to finish compiling her report of how she'll go about executing her mission; leave it up to the Director to give her extra homework. When she reentered the sitting area Tony was reading one of her files.

"If that was meant to kill someone you would be dead right now. Tony why do you have to be so nosy?"

Tony looked up from the file and grinned "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you didn't love me my dear."

"You're like the cousin I never had Tony, of course I love you. It's your need to poke your nose in everyone's business is what errs me," she said matter of factly.

Tony glanced back at the file he just read, an eyebrow arched upwards

"So eye-patch finally decided to give you a mission after 6 months and he felt it was a good idea to have you babysit a temperamental Norse god?"

"I'm not complaining, its better than nothing and besides I'm looking forward to this mission and before you ask why, it cause I think it will be a great challenge for me."

Tony studied her for a few seconds "knowing you and I know you quite well, it's more than one reason. Just be careful okay kiddo?"

Omidah walked over and gave him a quick hug "I'll be fine Tony, what I'm worried about is how you and everyone else feels about having Loki in the tower"

Rolling his eyes Tony flicked Omidah's nose "the hell Tony, what was that for?"

"Just felt like it and we'll be fine just as long as Reindeer games behaves."

She and Tony both knew it was easier said than done.

It took one week for Omidah to have everything prepared for Loki's arrival. Looking down at her watch, it showed half past one. She was informed that Thor would be bringing Loki by two.

Dressed in a simple olive turtleneck sweater and black jeans accompanied by ankle high boots, she stood on the balcony standing a distance away from the helipad.

Shifting her eyes back to her watch which now showed half past two. Omidah groaned in annoyance *Thor is late.....which is not really like him.....what's taking them so long?*

"Well this is very unprofessional, unless Odin changed his mind and decided to keep Loki imprisoned on Asgard." She frown at the idea "Oh goddess I hope that isn't the case,"

Pulling out her work phone she was about to speed dial Fury when a bright light descended from the sky and landed on the helipad. As quickly as it came, it vanished and left standing was Thor and beside him the infamous Loki as Coulson likes to call him.

She breathed a sigh of relief glad they didn't cancel at last minute but pulled a straight face and decided to mess with Thor a little bit for making her wait.

"Thor you are late by thirty minutes and twenty-five seconds, I was beginning to wonder if plans were cancelled."

Thor flashed her a quick grin "Lady Omidah I apologize for the delay but there was a slight mishap before our departure," he grumbled the last part while gliding his eyes in Loki's direction.

Omidah had to refrain herself from snickering. Leave it up to the God of Mischief to cause a mishap

"I see. Well mishaps do happen" she said with a shrug "but you're still late, so to make it up to me, you are not allowed pop tarts for the next week."

Omidah watched as Thor became slightly pale and looked like he was about to pass out. She started to laugh because he just looked like a lost puppy

"Thor I'm joking, I would never deny you pop tarts, you'll simply go into a coma without them but you still have to make up for being late okay?"

Thor breathed in relief and smiled "I'm thrilled that my pop of tarts will not be taken away from me and once again I'm sorry for the delay,"

Nodding she began to walk over to the brothers, a perplexed look crossed her features when she noticed the muzzle around Loki's mouth. The darn thing looked very uncomfortable and she thought it was very unnecessary. It angered her slightly. Wasn't Loki a prince of Asgard? Why was he being treated like an animal?

"Thor I would very much appreciate it if you removed that infernal contraption off your brother and please for the love of the river Nile take off these chains, he looks very uncomfortable. He's not a prisoner in Asgard but a guest in the Tower," She said with a slight irritation in her voice.

She felt eyes on her, so shifting her gaze from Thor she found Loki staring at her in confusion.

"Well if he didn't try to escape the moment he felt the dungeons, he wouldn't be in chains"

"Regardless he's here now so take 'em off, we still need to get him settled plus I need to report to Fury in the next half hour. You and I both know he gets like a cranky old lady when he's kept waiting"

Thor faced Loki preparing to remove the 'infernal contraption' as Omidah called it. Once it was off, the chains were next. Loki gently rubbed his wrists and looked back at the female across from him.

She sent him a gentle smile which only confused him further. He searched her eyes and found no hostility in them, just curiosity and slight excitement.

"Much better, thank you Thor. Well let me be the first to welcome you back to Stark Towers Mr. Laufeyson. My name is Omidah Pennwinkle and I'll be looking over you as you stay here." She grinned at her intro speech and the look of sheer confusion and disgust in Loki's eyes. He really didn't want to be there.

"Come gentlemen, there is much to do and I have...." glancing at her watch she turned and slowly started to walk back inside "fifteen minutes to do so before my boss starts screaming like a banshee in my eyes for reporting late."

The two brothers looked at her retreating form, glanced at each other and followed her through the waiting door. Loki groaned internally, he really didn't want to be there.