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sooniebby · 17 days ago

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ఌ 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐋𝐊𝐄𝐑

w.c › 6.6k

warnings › bottom male reader. A faceclaim for him, if you need visuals. Based on my short Drabble. Changed some things to keep it fresh.

plot › a stalker (you) who becomes an idol, experiences withdrawn feelings from not being able to stalk your bae anymore due to scheduling issues. So your sister forces you to make some online friends, one you get particularly close to.

kinks › phone sex

ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ-

Arakawa Naoki had a stalker.

Naoki couldn’t exactly remember when you began watching him. He just randomly noticed you appearing in places you weren’t before. At first he was creeped out—wondering what trusted adult he should tell.

Until he saw you trip over your own shoelace when trying to discreetly follow him into a grocery store.

Then he just started seeing you as a kid who wanted attention but would rather die than directly ask for it.

You were pretty harmless. After six months of your ‘stalking’, you began leaving him gifts and food. It was mostly his favorites too. How could he not appreciate you?

Once he had graduated middle school and moved to high school, he honestly expected to never see you again. Until he noticed you in his assigned classroom. Judging by how quickly you shoved a book in your face—you weren’t expecting him.

His luck.

That’s when he learned your name.

Momoi (Name).

Your last name was cute. Peach well? Adorable even.

He couldn’t find you scary at all. Though your classmates seemed to disagree. No one would talk to you or even glance your way unless they had no choice. He didn’t understand why, you were cute.

Sure, you didn’t put any efforts into your looks. Your tie was a mess, white shoes that were caked with dirt, cardigan missing buttons, a strange black stain on your blouse. Your face was permanently in a frown, eyes staring off into space if they weren’t looking at Naoki.

Okay.

Okay, maybe you weren’t cute to the average person.

But Naoki saw past that. He began paying attention to you—how could he not? He noticed that you were into music. One of the rare times you actually did something that wasn’t dedicated to him.

He saw you staring almost longingly at the music club last week. But you didn’t attempt to walk into the room, opting to quickly walk away.

You hardly knew how to hide your diary, having it out on your desk, wide open even when you left to the restroom. It made sense, no one ever went near you at all. Only Naoki cared enough to see what you could’ve possibly written.

5月10日 Arakawa-San recently got a bad haircut.. it’s really bad… but he’s still cute… so I’ll ignore it

5月11日 Sis keeps bothering me to audition, stupid. How do you nicely tell someone to shut up?

5月16日 Sis told me writing in the diary everyday would help me but honestly I feel like a psycho. Besides, I’m not sure what to write sometimes, should I just put nonsense?

5月17日クククククククククククククククララララララララララ, おぉ〜 ??????? 悲しい嬉しい !!!!!!!! What if I jumped in front of the train, would it be an instant death? Hm

Mostly nonsense for the most part. Especially after May 17th. Seemed like you gave up actually writing your feelings in it. Oh well, it was a nice look into his weird stalker.

“Don’t you think Momoi-San is a bit… strange…?”

Naoki glanced up from your diary. He had taken it up from your desk yesterday and it seemed you hadn’t noticed yet. You were both now seniors and were once again in the same class.

“What do you mean?” Naoki questioned, glancing back at your diary. His friend, Nakamura groaned as he rubbed at his hair. He scooted closer which caused Naoki to quickly position your diary so Nakamura couldn’t get a passing glance.

“I feel like he follows you around! I’ve just started noticing!”

Naoki held back a laugh. Nakamura was about four years late.

“You’re imagining things. Why would anyone follow me? I’m not anyone important.”

“I guess… but…”

10月4日 Momo-Chan died yesterday. I didn’t think hamsters could live ten years. Sis really cared for that rodent

11月7日 I’ve been watching 悪い髪 for four years now but I haven’t even spoken to him this is bad, I got rejected from the university he applied to I haven’t even told mom and dad I only applied to one… they’ll kill me

12月19日 forgot I had this stupid thing sis is dragging me to an audition next year maybe by then she’ll forget I can just be a full time stalker

3月23日 she didn’t forget—it’s next week. Oh god, 行きたくない、行きたくない！姉さん、お願いだから

“Naoki! Since when did you read???” Nakamura snapped his fingers, catching Naoki’s attention.

“What?” Naoki closed the diary and shook his head, “you have no proof. No sense in getting paranoid over hearsay. Just leave it alone.”

Nakamura sighed and rolled his eyes, “fine. But I’m not being weird, that guys a freak. I won’t be surprised if he has nothing going for him after we graduate.”

ཆི❤︎ཆྀ

もと��

To say Nakamura was dead wrong would be an understatement. You and your sister must’ve went to that audition and passed with flying colors. Because next thing Naoki knew was that you were on a poster at his part time job with your sister, teasing your debut. Mo to Mo.

You had cleaned up nice for the photoshoot, Naoki felt validated for thinking you were cute underneath all that ‘dirt.’ It seemed the agency was leaning heavily into an alternative and more edgy look with you and your sister.

Naoki didn’t think he’d ever seen your bare arms before until that poster. That stare that your past classmates saw as terrifying was oddly sensually. He was happy that you had something going for yourself, his stalker.

But…

He didn’t expect that meant he’d only get to see you on the tv from now on.

2 years later

“(Name), stop wallowing in your stolen hoodie please. You can’t keep getting so sad every time it’s his birthday.” Hiyori, your sister said, kicking your back as she walked past you to the kitchen.

You only whimpered, curling into Naoki’s sweater that you stole on December 19th, your 2nd year at high school. He had left it in his locker one day and you just wanted it, luckily he often forgot to lock his locker.

“But… Sis…” You whined, wiping away a few tears with your hand. “I only know what university he went to… I have no time to see him anymore.”

“It’s not like you ever spoke to him.” Hiyori muttered, tossing an apple up and down as she walked back over to living room. She kicked you once more before plopping down onto the couch, resting her feet on your body.

You made no effort to move. “But… I liked seeing him… even if didn’t say anything to him. Seeing him.. helped.”

“You’re lucky he never noticed just how insane you are. You could’ve been in jail right now.”

“Mhm.” You glanced over at your phone, tapping on the screen. “Do you think he’s having a good birthday?”

Hiyori only hummed, “maybe. Arakawa Naoki, right? How’d you even start stalking him?”

“He helped me.”

“Helped. Yea, that’s enough information,” Hiyori shook her head, deciding she was done with you for the time being. She began tapping away at her phone, occasionally giggling. Probably her girlfriend.

You watched the time tick on your phone, right when it reached midnight. The day was now December 25th, Christmas Day. No longer Arakawa Naoki’s birthday. You groaned and turned off your phone, glancing over at Hiyori.

“Merry Christmas…”

“Merry Christmas. Let’s go to the aquarium, that’ll cheer you up.” Hiyori said, taking her feet off your body.

“Aquarium…” You muttered, shifting over to glance up at her. “Tokyo Sea Life Park?”

“If that’s what you want. It shouldn’t be too busy when we go.”

It was very busy.

“What the hell?” Hiyori groaned, pulling down her hat to cover her face. She squeezed past a group of students pressed against the windows. “Tch, these kids have no respect. Hogging up the glass, can’t even see shit.”

You hummed absentmindedly, glancing around. “It’s fine. I just want to see the voyagers.” Your face was properly covered with a mask and sunglasses, a hat resting on the top of your head.

“It’s a Sunday—why are so many people here! I’m sweating too much.” Hiyori complained, her mask slipping down a bit. “Go off without me, I need a water.”

“You sure?”

“Go!” She waved you off, already walking away.

“Ah, okay..” You only shrugged. Better to let her cool off than aggravate her any further. You dodged and weaved through the crowds, coming across couples and families that were taking photos of the fish. It had been two years since visiting Tokyo Sea Life Park in Edogawa City.

You’d come frequently on Mondays and Wednesdays because Naoki would usually have baseball practice. Despite how much you loved him, watching him practice could only be so much fun after awhile.

“Look, isn’t he cute?”

“Ah, don’t point at him! It’s rude.”

“Is he a model?”

“You can’t even see his face, his hat’s hiding it!”

You glanced over at the two girls whispering about, not paying any attention to the fish swimming behind them. Ah, young love. Cute. You shook your head and looked over at the sign on the walls. Voyagers of the Sea… Voyagers of the Sea…

“Excuse me, are you looking for something?”

“Ah,” you glanced up, coming face to face with an employee. They were dressed a bit weird. Wearing a hat and mask. Could employees wear something like that? “Uh, hm, where’s the Voyagers of the Sea? It’s been awhile since I’ve been here.”

The employee turned their head to the map on the wall, muttering to themselves. Shouldn’t an employee know where everything is? You were about to just tell them to forget when they suddenly reached over and grabbed your hand.

“I found it. C’mon.” They sounded like a man. You gasped as he tugged you along. The path was bumpy, constantly having to skid to a stop due to the large crowds. You winced each time you bumped right into his back. Gosh, he had broad shoulders.

Two more sharp turns and another knock to your nose on his shoulder, you arrived at the Voyagers of the Sea. You rubbed your nose, groaning to yourself before glancing over at the tanks.

You couldn’t help but grin. “It’s still pretty.” You whispered mainly to yourself, stepping close to the glass. “Bluefin tuna,” you pointed as it swam past, “eagle ray, scalloped hammerhead.”

“Y’know,” you glanced back at the employee who was standing near you. He hadn’t left yet surprisingly. “Bluefin tuna are the largest tuna species. My sister says they’re also the tastiest. And scalloped hammerheads have a 360-degree vision, but then that means they can’t see in front of them. One time, when I was here as a student, one of the fishes was hiding in front of the scalloped hammerhead’s nose. And—”

“—You really like these things. Are you a marine biologist?” He suddenly interrupted you, tilting his head.

“Oh, sorry. I’m not. I couldn’t study something like that.” You didn’t elaborate. You glanced down at your hand, the employee’s hand casually holding yours. “Uhm. You, uh, don’t need to—”

“—Sorry.” He quickly dropped your hand as if he was burned. “Sorry. You just have… soft hands. Very comfortable.”

“Thanks,” you glanced at his name tag. “Nakamura-San.”

“Naka—?” He interrupted himself letting out a laugh, nodding slightly. “Right, right… I’m Nakamura.”

“Mhm. That’s what your name tag says.”

“It does, doesn’t it?” Nakamura laughed. “Do you have anymore fish facts?”

“Aren’t you working right now? I don’t want to bore you.”

“It’s okay. I’m interested in learning.”

“Ah. Okay. Well, hammerheads give birth to live pups, and usually a female hammerhead can fertilize her own eggs without a male. But as soon as she has the pups, the baby hammerheads learn how to survive all on their own.”

“Really? They don’t need a parent?”

“No. They do just fine.”

“Self sufficient.” Nakamura hummed, pulling down his hat. “You’re interesting. Are you in school?”

“No. I uhm, work in the music industry.”

Nakamura perks up at that, looking over at you. Though you weren’t too sure due to his hat covering his eyes. “Really? Do you know Mo to Mo?”

You felt yourself freeze. “Ah, uhm, I’ve heard of them…”

“My friend really likes them. She blasts their music all the time, I think I know the lyrics by heart by now.”

“Mhm, they’re good, so I’ve heard.”

“Yea, have you—”

“—It’s Momoi Hiyori!!!!”

“Hiyori-San, sign my tits please!!!”

“Sign my forehead!!!”

“Momoi Hiyori?” Nakamura whispered as you felt yourself panic. The sounds of fans grew louder with the accompaniment of loud heels clicking against the floor.

There, your sister, hat long gone and mask off entirely, was sprinting your way. She was frantically motioning for you to start running as a crowd of fans were right on her heels.

“Crap.” You whispered, ready to book it but Nakamura grabbed your arm.

“Wait! Can I get your LINE ID?”

“LINE ID?” You whispered in shock. Only your family and manager had your LINE ID.

“Hurry up, Seabrain!!!!” Hiyori yelled, rushing past you.

You cursed and pulled out your phone, fumbling to open up LINE and show your QR code. “Here, here. Just scan it and add me.”

Nakamura rushed to scan the code, humming once he got it. “I got it. Let’s—” but as soon as he glanced back up, you were long gone.

“—hang out sometime…?”

He pulled off his hat and rubbed at his head. “He’s fast…” he glanced down at his phone and looked at your account.

Account Name: シーブレイン

“ぱらぱら” — 好きです

The profile picture was of a koi fish, a hand reaching into the pond to touch its scales.

“Seabrain? Cute.”

ཆི❤︎ཆྀ

ナオイス

シーブレインちゃん, hi~ it’s ’Nakamura’

“Good, good. Lean down further, please. Beautiful.” The photographer said. The sounds of camera flashing and continuous talking almost caused you to miss your phone ringing. Which was strange.

You had little to no contacts. Who could be texting you? It had been nearly two weeks since you had went to Tokyo Sea Life Park. You opened LINE and were surprised to see a request.

“Naoise? Naoise?” You struggled to pronounce the name, tilting your head. What type of name was that? It was just nonsense. “Seabrain-Chan? Is he making fun of me…?” You huffed and turned off your phone, placing it face down on the table.

“Who’s making fun of who?”

You squeaked, glancing up to see Hiyori. She was dressed in a skintight bodysuit, hair slicked back with copious amounts of gel, sharp dark eyeliner and black lipstick. “Hah, answer me.” She said, reaching over to grab your phone.

“Ah, wait!” You reached over to stop her but she easily grabbed both of your wrists in one hand and unlocked your phone.

“Hm? N-Nao-Naoise? Hm, strange name. Seabrain-Chan, hi, it’s Nakamura. Who’s Nakamura?”

“Just an employee at the Tokyo Sea Life Park. He asked for my LINE ID before we had to leave.” You grunted, trying to pull your hands free. How the hell was your sister stronger than you?

“Aren’t you going to answer him? He’s your first contact that’s not family or a coworker. Here, I’ll answer for you.”

“Wait!!”

シーブレイン

(⌒▽⌒)☆ hey, Nakamura-Kun~ I thought you’d never text me

“Are you insane?! Why did you use the a text face?!” You whined, as Hiyori showed you the text she sent. “And I sound so desperate!”

“Why not? It’s cute.”

“Cute?!” You groaned. “Not at all, only kids use that!”

“Not true. My girlfriend sends them to me all the time.” She released your wrists and hands over your phone, pulling out her own to text her girlfriend. “Anyway, talk to this Nakamura guy, maybe he’ll get you to forget Arakawa.”

You frowned. There’s no way you’d ever forget him. Not someone like him.

ナオイス

Aren’t you cute? 悪いな, 海洋くん。

I got busy, my parents and siblings came to visit me since they missed my birthday Couldn’t refuse them

Marine-Kun? You rolled your eyes. Well, it wasn’t like he knew your name. You didn’t really feel like entertaining this any longer but you thought about how your life has been so far. Sure, you technically had fans but you did feel a bit lonely.

Back then, you could watch Naoki and feel moderately okay. Just seeing him was good enough to brighten your mood. But you haven’t been able to see him in two whole years.

Maybe you should… try to forget him?

You shuddered at the thought. Okay. Not forget him. Just, gain a friend.

シーブレイン

気にしない。

I was busy too. I have to prepare for an upcoming single

ナオイス

Single? Woah

Are you a producer? Songwriter?

シーブレイン

“Sis!!!” You suddenly shot up, startling Hiyori. She glared at you. “What should I do?”

“What? Why are you screaming?”

“I told him I have to prepare for a single! But! I don’t know what to say? Who do I pretend to be? A singer? Or maybe a makeup artist? Songwriter? I told him I worked in the music industry, I can’t possibly be a makeup artist, oh what should say—!”

“Just say you’re a backup vocalist and are participating in the music video.”

“Ah.” You grin. “Smart. You’re so smart, Big Sis!” You give her a wet kiss on the cheek that she quickly wipes away with a groan, turning your attention back to your phone.

シーブレイン

Backup vocalist. I was just asked to participate in the music video.

ナオイス

mjk? すごい！

You’re cool. I’m just studying meteorology.

Probably become a weather forecaster ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

シーブレイン

Weather forecaster? Is that what you want?

ナオイス

No way

I was a baseball player but

Fucked up left leg, it was bound to happen, I already sprained it once

シーブレイン

それな are you okay now?

ナオイス

Yea. It’s been a year now, I’m

ksnjdnwbdow

You froze, raising an eyebrow. “Ksnjd… is this roman alphabet slang I don’t know?” You began typing the letters into the search bar when he suddenly texted you again.

ナオイス

悪いな。

I need to head back to work, almost got caught by my boss (＞人＜;)

See ya~ シュモクザメ (^_^)/~~~

“Hammerhead shark?” You grumbled, unable to hide the slight smile on your lips. “He’s going to call me everything in the ocean…” you finally took the time to actually see his profile picture. It was of a teddy bear, brown with an eye missing, close to the camera. Though you could still see the background of beach sand.

“That was fast, did you forget about Arakawa by now?”

“Never!”

ཆི❤︎ཆྀ

“I’m not doing that again, Nakamura, those aquariums are stressful.”

Naoki sighed, shoving his phone into his back pocket. His hair was pulled into a ponytail as he slipped on some gloves. He began cutting up some fish.

“Why are you even in the kitchen?”

Nakamura rolled his eyes, “it’s my mom’s restaurant, I can go wherever. But c’mon, please? They’re only free on Sunday and I used up most of my vacation days already.”

“Sorry, I can hardly handle standing in here for three hours straight. I’m not doing your job for you again.” Naoki held up the knife, pointing it at Nakamura when he attempted to get close.

“Didn’t you get some guys LINE ID because of me?”

“Because of you?” Naoki chuckled, shaking his head. “Keep talking and you’ll replace this tuna.” He slid the knife clean against the tuna’s body, the head off without a second slice.

Nakamura rubbed his neck. “Sheesh. Fine fine. I’ll figure something out… so cruel. Ah, that Momoi kid is having a comeback soon. Do you still keep up with him?”

“No.” Naoki muttered, pulling out the spine from the tuna. “I haven’t since my accident. He stopped stalking me.”

“I still can’t believe you actually liked that he was stalking you.”

“You wouldn’t get it. But I’ve gotten over him, alright?”

“I’m glad I don’t. Try to form a healthy relationship with this new guy, okay?”

“Stop asking me to take your Sunday shifts for your mysterious babe, okay?”

ཆི❤︎ཆྀ

4 years ago

You were a senior in middle school, staring down at the lake beneath you. Your shoes were placed down beside you. Your backpack resting on the ground as you peered over the railing. You were a bit short back then, still lagging behind the other boys who were finally getting tall.

Hiyori had teased you’d probably end up her height. Lo and behold you were only an inch taller than her in the present.

“Is that… hm, what’s that one?” You whispered, pushing on your toes a little, trying to see what was floating above the water. It was a bit hard to see—the sun going down being your only source of light.

“They really need to make more light posts.”

You pulled at your uniform to only to feel your button pop loose, falling into the lake below. A curse was on the tip of your tongue as you looked down. It fell with a quiet plop, not even making enough noise or movement to seemingly bother the inhabitants of the lake.

The drop wasn’t high by any means. But the lake wasn’t safe for people to get in. It was deep and the current was surprisingly fast. Once you got swept in, it would be hard to leave. You were honestly wondering if this was actually a lake. It had to have been a river that was just unnaturally wide.

As you pondered what to actually call the body of water underneath the bridge, you heard someone yell.

You glanced to your left just before you tackled to the ground. A delayed cry left your lips from the sudden force. You awaited the pain but didn’t feel anything. The person who tackled you had managed to take the fall damage, now that you were laying atop of them.

You slowly gazed down, noting their middle school uniform, and to your shock—a leg brace on their left leg. A shocked gasp left your lips, catching sight of their forgotten crutches on the ground not too far from you.

This person… was insane?

Said person began to cough violently, their hands digging into your back. You sat up and made sure to not accidentally touch their left leg. The sunset was your only light at this point. Yellow-orange rays shined down on the boy beneath you.

His black hair formed around on the ground, resembling a halo. A little cut on his cheek. On his right cheek there was a mole, almost directly on his cheekbones. His hands slowly slide down your back before falling limply to the ground.

“Hey… Oi. Did you hit your head?!” You whispered, reaching down to touch the back of his head. Sure enough, as you brought your hand back, there was a bit of blood on the tip of your fingers.

You fished out your phone and quickly called for an ambulance. As you waited, you heard a little laugh. You glanced down to see the boy staring up at you, his lips slowly pulling into a little grin.

“At least..” he muttered, his voice hoarse. “The ambulance is for me.”

“What…? I—did you think I was going to jump?”

He didn’t answer, his gaze unfocusing. You gently rubbed his cheek, hoping to keep him awake.

“I was just looking at the water. I’m sorry, please don’t be too hurt because of me…” You frowned. The only reason your shoes were off was because the right shoe had torn open. You were just waiting for Hiyori to get back from the nearby convenience store with some flip flops.

Now you were waiting for an ambulance.

“Prob… just a concussion.” He suddenly whispered, humming slightly. “Don’t worry.”

“Don’t fall asleep. What’s your name?”

“Arakawa.. Naose.”

“Naose?”

“Se?” He began to giggle. “Did I say se? Nice? Ki… meant Ki.. Naoki…”

“Naoki?”

“Hm?”

“Stay awake, please. They’re almost here. Think about, ah, maybe the amount of sea life that can live in a river. How they live different to like, uh, ponds or lakes? Do you like koi fish?”

“Sorry… but that’s really boring…” He muttered, groaning. “I’m falling asleep.”

“Sea life is boring to you?”

“Very… but it’s nice that you like it. I think.. I like.. the sky? Dunno, heheh. Koi fish, is that your name?”

“Huh?”

“Koi-Kun, you… hehe, should be… hm… what was I gonna say?” He began to giggle, raising one hand to gently point at your nose. “Do you, poke fish noses?”

“Fish noses?”

“The weathers nice.” He changed the subject, eyes struggling to stay open. “Y’know… legs’ real ‘urt. Tink ade t rse. Heheh.. ably never play gain.”

“Play what?” You gently patted his face, causing him to open his eyes again.

“Baseball. Mhm… just for a second… lemme..”

You tapped him again. “Stay awake please.”

“So mean…” he gazed over at you, a little smile on his lips. “You…. Pretty.. in a weird way. Koi-Kun.”

The sound of sirens caught your attention before you could respond. “Ah, they’re here! Hey, hey, Naoki-San, Naoki-San!”

That was how you met him, giving him a concussion and perhaps ruining his baseball career.

Young love (⁎⁍̴̛ᴗ⁍̴̛⁎)

ཆི❤︎ཆྀ

ナオイス

くらげさん, おはよう～(・ω・)ノ slept well?

シーブレイン

Jellyfish? That’s new, are you going to stick with a nickname or just keep calling me new ones each time?

ナオイス

∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿ of course～でも！you know the kanji for jellyfish, right?

シーブレイン

海月? Umi? Tsuki?

ナオイス

Ya, Sea Moon, if you directly translate it in English wwwww

It’s what I think of you, cold and deep, so mysterious, like the sea～ and round, bright, and shiny, like the moon～

シーブレイン

Bright? The moon?

Most people wouldn’t agree with that, the moon doesn’t provide its own light

ナオイス

Right

But it still shines, even if it needs some help

Think of me as your sun, helping you shine,

Sea Moon～ (⁎⁍̴̛ᴗ⁍̴̛⁎)

Later, I have class

“Holy shit.” Hiyori cursed, staring at your phone in shock.

You and ‘Nakamura’ have been chatting for around two months now. The conversations were pretty boring for the most part. Honestly you assumed he’d stop talking to you due to how dry and cold you were. But he’d always respond quickly.

He always made time to respond to you. He even said his name wasn’t ‘Nakamura’ but he never told you his actual name. Not like you asked, you probably should.

He was really into using text faces. At first you viewed them as childish but you got used to them. They could be cute, occasionally.

You two shared pictures but never of yourselves. Just of dinner or any other item that was interesting enough.

“He.. he must like you!” Hiyori whispered, looking over at you. “Who could say something so.. casually?!”

“He can’t. He doesn’t even know what I look like! Or who I actually am! He’d freak out.”

“I doubt that.” Hiyori sighed, rubbing her hands through her hair. “You should try sending something, see if he’s just those friends who are poetic platonically.”

“What would I send?”

“Something sexy.”

“No way.”

You sighed, rubbing at your face as you stared down at your phone. Okay, you’ve always had a problem with saying no to your sister’s ideas. After some goading, you reluctantly took a video.

Hiyori already told you what to say once you pressed send. The video was just of you recording yourself in one of the outfits for your recent music video. It was one of your more scandalous outfits, skin tight pants with holes throughout. A see through shirt and a choker. Chains decorated the outfit.

It was a whole thing.

The video was only about ten seconds. You made sure to have your face out of frame as you pointed your phone down at your pants. There was a mirror right across from you, you laid on a couch, legs spread out, back slightly arched. Your hand was shaky as slid down to your crotch.

Pants button was already open as you gently gripped the edge of your shit that was tucked into the pants, slowly pulling it out. The slightest glance at the thin, tight black briefs you wore before quickly ending the video.

Hiyori’s ‘excuse’ was a simple and planned: “oooh, sorry sorry! I didn’t mean to send this video!” Then you’d send a normal video just showcasing your outfit in the mirror, standing up.

Good enough excuse since you could feign innocence, both videos did have you in the same outfit. And so long as you goaded ‘Nakamura’ into asking for what you wore for the video—it’d make sense.

Hiyori had said that ‘Nakamura’ would either forget and push past the video, or get horny.

You didn’t know what exactly you wanted.

You were a bit scared at the thought of making him uncomfortable—losing your first and only friend you have right now. But there was a small little part of you that was curious, deadly curious to how he felt about you.

ナオイス

Did you go to bed yet?

I can’t sleep (｡ ́︿ ̀｡)

You shot up from bed, staring at your phone.

This was your chance.

シーブレイン

Still awake

Is everything okay?

ナオイス

I’m ok (˶‾᷄ ⁻̫ ‾᷅˵) just a bit of pain in my leg again

But it stops after a few minutes

What～did～you～do～today～？ᶘ ᵒᴥᵒᶅ

シーブレイン

I filmed the music video

It was for a b-side song for the artist’s album that came out a few weeks ago

Very fun, so busy, the outfits were nice

ナオイス

wowowo ♪( ´θ｀)ノすごいね！

What were the outfits? The singer didn’t make you wear trash bags so you wouldn’t outshine them, right~? (ﾟoﾟ;;

Today I just had class, my friend was blasting Mo to Mo’s new album, it’s catchy

シーブレイン

ww no they didn’t do that

We got good outfits

Oh, you changed your profile pic

You glanced at his picture, taking note of the new one. It was of that same teddy bear now directly in the sand. A human hand held out a peace sign, acting as if that was the teddy bear’s own hand.

シーブレイン

You really like that teddy bear

ナオイス

You noticed?

Yea, I do, it was given to me in my senior year at middle school

Don’t remember who gave it to me, just woke up in the hospital with it in my arms

Mom said the person left a note, just telling me sea life isn’t boring wwwwwwww ╭(╯3╰)╮

Anyway~ send send!!

You paused. Sea life isn’t boring? No, it couldn’t be. You shook your head. Sure, it was very specific, but—you couldn’t be the only person to write a note like that. Besides, that teddy bear is basic. Yea, it’s not you. No way. No, way.

You rubbed your face as you pulled up the video. You hesitated. Should you really do this? Wouldn’t it be more mature to just ask him if he might like you romantically? That would be smarter. Less manipulative.

Not like you could talk. You stalked a boy for four years straight. The only reason you stopped was because your schedule was overwhelming and any free time you had, you just wanted to sleep. Besides, you didn’t know where Arakawa Naoki really was anyway.

Sure you knew the school but it was a well known and large university. There were so many students. You didn’t even know what major he went in for. It’d take you awhile to find him.

Just as you were debating to yourself, your finger pressed against the screen. You glanced down to see that you sent the risky video.

Well—

You almost screamed in panic, ready to unsend the message but it was too late. It showed that he saw it. He viewed it. He more than likely just finished watching the full ten seconds.

Oh god.

It was a slow and agonizing minute as you stared at your phone, almost waiting for him to cuss you out. But instead, you got a video.

Your finger hovered over the video before pressing play. You quickly paused it though, reaching over for your headphones. Even if your room was on the other side of the shared apartment, you didn’t want to risk it.

After a deep breath and the little beep telling you the headphones were connected—you pressed play once more.

The video was a bit dark, the soft glow of the moonlight being your only light. A shuddered sigh left ‘Nakamura’ before he pointed the camera to his pajama pants. He tugged at the waistband, pulling it far before letting it snap right back against his skin.

A tight grunt left him just as the video ended.

ナオイス

Am I overthinking things?

It wasn’t an accident, right?

シーブレイン

It technically was

But I recorded the video with you in mind

Silence. You almost wondered if you went too far.

ナオイス

Can you show me more?

シーブレイン

Like another video?

ナオイス

Yea

I’ll send too

Not even a second later, he sent another video. You didn’t hesitate to play it. The video was mostly silence, the sound of sheets rustling as he kept the camera at his pants. His free hand returned to the waistband and tugged, but this time his pulled it further down.

You expected him to have been wearing boxers but to your surprise, his cock was now free. It was already leaking wet—coating white pre cum on his soft stomach. Now free, his hand grasped his cock, his thumb rubbing the pre cum across the head.

ナオイス

Kinda, hard to type one handed

Do me a favor

Masturbate like you’re alone

Don’t hold back

Your body involuntarily shivers as you reach over and turn on your fairy lights, allowing a little bit of light. You pointed the camera to your lower half, kicking the sheets off the bed.

You hesitated for just a moment before pressing record. Should you talk? You didn’t really speak a lot in general unless spoken to. Shaking your head, you slip two fingers into your mouth and suck, coating them with your saliva.

Despite feeling a little anxious, you didn’t attempt to muffle the wet sounds. You pulled your hand away and reached down, using your thumb to pull down your boxers. Your cock plopped out free, beginning to harden due to your rising excitement.

A low sigh left your lips as you reached down between your legs. Because of the angle, he wouldn’t be able to see much. But he would be able to hear the squelch as you easily slipped in two fingers inside your ass.

He would be dumb to not realize you must’ve masturbated an hour or so ago.

You ended the video just as your cock sprung to life, pressing send immediately. The wait for his response almost felt like torture. Your cock leaking dejectedly on your stomach. Your legs shifted on the bed as you tried not to continue on to reach your third orgasm of the night.

Not even a minute later he replied to you.

His video was straight to the point—the teasing long forgotten.

His hand grasped his cock as he jerked himself off. The sound of his shallow breaths and wet gasps filled your ears. You forgot all about recording another video, thrusting your fingers in and out, easily reaching your prostate.

You dropped your phone and gripped your cock, sighing at the relief. His moans were driving you insane—you wanted to hear it in person. Wanted to be the one touching him. Hearing every sharp gasp, watching his body shake from the pleasure.

“….gonna.. cum…”

A grunt your lips at his words. It sounded as if he struggled to even say those two words, his voice wet and shaky. You couldn’t hold back anymore. Being overstimulated from your previous masturbation didn’t help. A rub right against your prostate and a wet stroke of your cock, you were cumming right as he released a wet whimper.

You bit your lip to muffle yourself as much as possible, eyes threatening to roll to the back of your head. Your phone pinged again just as you remembered you forgot to record something.

ナオイス

Sorry, haven’t really

Properly masturbated in awhile

Did you cum at least?

シーブレイン

ええ

I came early too, don’t worry about it

It’ll be longer next time

ナオイス

Next time? ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿

Do you like me, Sea Moon~?

You paused. You liked him enough to masturbate but. You wiped your dirty hands on your boxers. The word like was always associated with Arakawa Naoki.

Even now. Even after your little session with ‘Nakamura’…

You could only see a mole on a cheek and messy hair.

No. You didn’t like him.

Just as you were about to respond, he sent a picture. You opened it without a second thought, expecting a risky photo.

But the sight caused you pause.

It was of him.

‘Nakamura’.

Even with only the moonlight as your guide, you knew him. You knew Arakawa Naoki. Even if only half of his face was visible. The infamous teddy bear was in his arms. Half of his face resting on the pillow, a shy grin on his lips.

The mole rested on the same spot it always has, greeting you in the moonlight.

His hair messy and wild. You wondered if you were delusional for thinking it looked like it formed into a halo on the pillow.

ナオイス

Since you can’t actually see me

Post sex wwww (*ﾉωﾉ)

Pretty, right~?

神ってるね?

You couldn’t think. What should you say? Of course he was pretty. He’s been the only person you’ve ever constantly thought about. Even in two years that you haven’t seen him—he’s only gotten more beautiful.

But, you couldn’t possibly do this to him. Stalking him for four years and suddenly you had semi phone sex with him. Sure Hiyori never out right said anything but you knew she wanted you to act more ‘normal.’

Especially with you now in the public eye. You can’t just watch him in the shadows. You were an adult, you had fans, two years of leaving Arakawa Naoki alone to live his life peacefully.

You should end it here.

But here’s the thing about you.

You needed Arakawa Naoki as much as you needed air to breathe.

And here he was, offering himself on a silver platter.

Two years without him and it felt like torture. It felt as if you couldn’t live without him. Before you could watch him from afar and survive but now…

Now you can’t stand by anymore.

You’ve experienced life without Arakawa Naoki and you promised yourself to never experience it again.

シーブレイン

荒川直樹

ナオイス

???

Huh? How’d you get my name?

From my account? Did I tell you and just forgot?

You smirked at your phone, going to your account and changing your name. It really was him. To think he returned your affection after all these years.

シームーン

You probably don’t even know my name, but I’ve been watching you since our senior year in middle school

I thought I lost you

But you’re here, it’s like you were waiting for me

Were you, Arakawa-San?

ナオイス

Momoi-San…?

Did you

You knew this entire time?

You ignore me for two years then knowingly make me believe I’m texting someone else this whole time?

You’re sick, is that singing career of yours not fun enough? Your girlfriend?

Some man you are — I hope the videos were worth it

He was typing too fast for you to even respond to one of his messages. Girlfriend? You didn’t know he was Arakawa until today, what the hell was he talking about?

シームーン

What? What are you talking about?

Hello?

Arakawa-San?

Each message you sent was sent with an error. You tore off your headphones as you sat up, staring down at your phone in complete shock.

He blocked you.

Lol. Yall want a part two? You’re basically turning into a yandere btw. Comment if you wanna be tagged!

Words/Slangs:

クククククククククククククククララララララララララ, おぉ〜 ??????? 悲しい嬉しい !!!!!!!! — Kukukukukukukukukukukukuku Klaralalalalalalalala, ohhh ??????? Sad and happy !!!!!!!!

悪い髪 — bad hair

行きたくない、行きたくない！姉さん、お願いだから — I don't want to go, I don't want to go! Please, sister

“ぱらぱら” — 好きです — “parapara” I love it (it’s the Japanese onomatopoeia for rain sounds)

悪いな, 海洋くん — sorry, marine-kun

気にしない。— don’t worry

mjk? — まじか (majika) Roman alphabet slang. Means “really”

すごい！— amazing

それな — Sorena, to express sympathy

くらげさん, おはよう～ — morning, Jellyfish-San

でも — but

wwwwww — Japanese’s lol or lmao

ええ — mhm

神ってるね? — heaven-sent; out of this world. He’s basically asking if his looks are godly

シームーン — sea moon

Tag list: @the-ultimate-librarian @tehyunnie @star-3214 @ning1e @anchoredphoenix @cherry-blossoms-187 @kiiyoooo @chill-guy-but-cooler @iwishtobeacrow @mello-life25 @smellwell @ofclyde @yuzuukix @remdayz @rhetorical-conscience @mooncarvers-world @castocipher @tomoeroi @love-kha1 @secretivemessenger @bensontrechic

#bottom male reader #x male reader #sub male reader #uke male reader #male reader #oc x reader #mlm ns/fw #male bottom reader #smut drabble #original character

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tiredguyswag · 1 year ago

Text

one of those masterposts for Sudan 🇸🇩

Disclaimer: I am not Sudanese, and am in no way an expert on the ongoing crisis. Corrections, if any, are welcome.

LAST UPDATED: 8th October 2024 [Please try to reblog the original post as much as possible]

So what's going on in Sudan? Sudan was under the rule of the military dictator Omar Al-Bashir for thirty years. He came to power through a military coup in June 1989. His rule saw extreme economic decline, repression, and conflict. In the December of 2018, a democratic revolution began that eventually overthrew the dictatorship on April 11, 2019, and saw the beginning of a military rule by militant parties SAF (Sudanese Armed Forces) and RSF (Rapid Support Forces). This unrest is, of course, funded by western governments.

On the 15th of April, 2023, fighting broke out in Khartoum between the SAF and RSF. Clashes spread across the nation of Sudan, and the civilian populace is still caught in the middle. According to UN officials, Sudan is in “one of the worst humanitarian nightmares in recent history."

There is an ongoing war in Sudan, and it's getting worse. There is a health crisis along with the humanitarian crisis as well: around 2/3rds of the population do not have access to healthcare services. Around 15-20 millions suffer from hunger. There are 70 non-operational healthcare facilities in conflict zones. Thousands killed, millions displaced, and a dramatic increase in sexual violence and rape cases.

Links for Learning Resources:

Hadhreen: Hadhreen started as an initiative by a small group of Sudanese youth in 2015. Since its inception it continued to work in a variety of sectors, most notably Emergency response, health, and in supporting vulnerable groups.

Talk About Sudan: Learn more about what's happening in Sudan and actions you can take. Also has donation links for those who are able.

Keep Eyes On Sudan: A website run by Sudanese diaspora to amplify the calls of the Sudanese people. Has donation links, actions you can take, upcoming protests and events, resources, FAQs, etc.

#SudanSyllabus.docx: An extensive and well-sourced document, providing English language resources about Sudanese history. It's really long and has got lots of links to books, articles, and more. Curated by Razan Idris.

Human Rights Watch

Donation Links:

List of verified charities providing humanitiarian assistance in Sudan

SudanFunds: Like GazaFunds, it is a compilation of GoFundMes for Sudanese individuals in war zones in need of help.

Help Sudan Tarada Initiative: The aim is to deliver emergency basic needs, food and medicine. Funds will be transferred directly to local charities and organization who are managing those shelters to make sure that the funds are well received and is spent on the needs specified.

One Million Sustainable Pads Campaign: Fundraiser to help provide women in IDPs camps with reusable pads

Zubeyda Adam and family (Sudan)

Our home bombarded and destroyed

Help my family escape Sudan's war

Save a transperson in african Refugee camp from starvation [Unsure about the legibility of this one since its not from the person themself, but if someone can verify this for me that would be great]

Hope For Sudan

Darfur Women Action

Doctors Without Borders

Fill A Heart: Financial Assistance to Sudanese Hospitals

Hometax: Sudan Relief

Cairo Sudan Aid

Amal For Women

Sudan Solidarity Collective

Sadagaat

UNICEF

These are all the links I have so far. Please spread awareness about Sudan! Let me know if there are any links I should add to the post and I will update it.

#lamp.txt #free sudan #eyes on sudan #sudan #keep eyes on sudan #sudan crisis #sudan genocide #hall of fame

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just1cefor4ll · 1 year ago

Note

I recently got into School bus graveyard and I COMPLETELY understand the hype, idk if im the only who does this... but literally the moment I was done I went to tumblr for fics, but there's like none?? So maybe some dating headcanons for the group!! ^^

Dating Headcanons for the sbg characters

Ashlyn Banner

best person to have a lazy day with tbh

i swear yall would be like “should we go out today” look at each other for 5 seconds and say “nah”

she would teach you some gymnastics and laugh when your just lying there complaining how you aren’t flexible

probably is more of a person that gives you gifts, or gives you a hug in stead of comforting you with words

she would be a bit awkward at first probably

also I don’t think she likes excessive physical touch cuz red confirmed that Ashlyn is autistic but when she gets used to you she would be okay with it but still, don’t go too hard on her

you let her play/stim with your fingers

you’re always there for her when she gets overwhelmed and she loves you so much for that

doesn’t call you that many nicknames probably a short version of your name but if your name is already short then probably just love or babe

if you speak another language she would definitely wanna know some words or learn with you

if it’s your mother language then she would be like “omg how was [your country] like!”

probably is a nerd in some sort of way

anyway probably a great girlfriend to have but only if you aren’t the type to be really really and I mean REALLY extroverted

Taylor Hernández

this girl is such a cutie!!

would plan dates, sleepovers, night outs..

drawing/picnic dates are a must

watching the sunset or sunrise together on the rooftop

calls you cute nicknames like sunshine, mi vida, sugar and that kind of stuff

is very affectionate

cuddles !!

shes the little spoon probably but if you’re feeling down then she will gladly be the big spoon

you would definitely braid her hair if you know how, if you don’t know then there’s another idea for a date! teaching you how to braid hair!

probably isn’t even that awkward at first probably a little bit shy but gets pretty confident later on

the best partner to have if you’re insecure

makes your insecurities disappear in a heartbeat

overall a 11/10 girlfriend !! we love taylor :D

Tyler Hernández

he is probably a tsundere tbh

acting like he doesn’t care but when you are alone he babies you sm

no matter if your bigger then him, stronger, smaller, it doesn’t matter, he babies you no matter what

don’t let the others know tho

isn’t afraid to show you off like girl bffr

holds your hand, has his hand on your waist, kisses you on the forehead, cheek or lips before class starts (even if you are in the same class)

uses nicknames like mi amor, mi reina/mi rey, baby ect.

nicknames with him are endless

movie night is a must

probably would take you to his baseball practice

has a separate album for you only

everyone in the group can tell he’s love sick like he looks at you with heart eyes

a jealous type probably

would beat up anyone and everyone who looks at you the wrong way

he’s probably touch starved and he hides his feelings from you because he just prioritises you over anything

you gotta full on force him to tell you what’s wrong but after a while he opens up to you normally

a 100/10 boyfriend the poor boys been through too much

Logan Fields

gardening dates!!

gives you flowers when you’re sad or just whenever to make your day!

stargazing dates

yapps your ear off about astrology (you let him tho)

calls you nicknames like bunny, hun, love

gives you honest opinions on everything

regrets his choices when you get grumpy afterwards

makes it up to you by cuddling you or kissing your whole face

introduces you to his grandparents

they approved of course because they just trust that he can pick himself a good s/o

hugs from behind!!

reads you a book when you can’t sleep

helps you with your work but doesn’t do it for you (Barron trauma)

best person to seek when you want comfort and or advice

gives you honest advice so if you were in the wrong expect him to tell you lmao

if you listen to music on vinyls or CDs then definitely brings you to a music shop and he will spoil you rotten

loves listening to your music taste no matter what genre it is he just wants to bond with you

he’s such an adorable and amazing boyfriend it mealts my heart !! :D

Aiden Clark

be prepared to patch this boy up every single second of the day

and also getting him out of trouble every single day

he is a wild one for sure

doesn’t mean he’s a bad boyfriend

loves showing you things he learned on his skateboard and he tries to teach you

does that thing where he holds your hands while your on the skateboard, tells you to jump and flips the board for you

that tik tok kind of shi

while on the topic of tik tok, does every silly couple tik tok trend with you lmao

yapps your ear of all day every day

not the best person to ask for advice from but he will hold you until you feel better!

best cuddle buddy

and hug buddy

if you don’t like physical touch then idk if you could have a relationship with him, he will CLING to you as if his life depended on it

loves it when you play with his hair

makes a playlist for you two

calls you nicknames like rockstar, doll, my love, bae, babe

definitely has you saved as “future wife🤭❤️” or “the mother of my kids🥵😍”

he be weird like that

loves to have you in his lap

idk he probably likes you ass sm, not in a sexual way but just lays on it, smacks it, squishes it..

only in private tho

honestly a pretty good boyfriend but he’s more of like your child then boyfriend

Ben Clark

a chill one for sure

hugs, holding hands are a must

listening to music through his headphones how he did with Taylor in that one episode

jealousy scale is um pretty high

you gotta reassure this boy because he’s just scared of loosing you

would fr fight 100 people at once for you if you asked him to

whenever he gets angry, you’re there for him when Aiden can’t and he appreciates that

loves it when you hold his hand and rub circles on the back of it

forehead kisses >>

probably doesn’t give you that many nicknames since he doesn’t speak, either a short version of your name, bae or hun

the best listener ever (not because he doesn’t speak)

when you start to yap and just talk about the most random things he has your back against his chest as he rests his chin on your shoulder

very chill and overall good boyfriend

993 notes · View notes

bts-trans · 4 months ago

Text

250303 Weverse Translations

RM's Post ❇️ with V's Comment 💬

바깥은 봄인가요 화천은 눈이 17cm가 왔습니다 전북 어디는 영상 20도가 넘는다는데 확실히 사계절이 뚜렷한 나라, 멋진 대한민국 맞습니다 음 갑자기 후임 하나가 생활관 앞에 이글루를 만들고 있습니다 여기서 추억이 참 많을 것 같아요 예.. 세상은 요지경 이제 대학생들은 개강을 하고 초중고딩 친구들은 새학기가 시작되겠군요 저도 드디어 군생활 앞자리를 떨궜습니다 로빈 훗마냥 달력에 하루하루 X자를 치고 있답니다 저 조난된 걸까요 아마도.. 그럴지도 야간 점호를 하면 늘 독서 연등을 가는 게 습관입니다 최근엔 미루어왔던 에리히 프롬의 '사랑의 기술'을 읽고 있습니다 사랑에 기술이라니 이게 웬 말일까요 사랑을 노력한다는 게.. 말이 되니? 요는 이렇습니다 우리는 그림을 잘 그리려고 기타를 잘 치려고 공부를 잘 하려고 수십 수백번 숙달하고 연습하면서 사람의 삶에서 가장 중요한 '사랑'은 왜 아무 연습도 숙달도 없이 그냥 하려는 거냐는 거죠 날로 먹으려는 그 마음! 현대 사회에서 사랑은 미디어나 자본주의에 의해 강렬한 감정과 드라마만 강조되어 오고 있지만 사실은 비장한 결의의고, 약속이며 결심이라는 것입니다 사랑엔 종류도 온도도 표정도 많겠지요 일대일이 아닌 일대다나 다대일인 우리는 어떤가요 음악을 만드는 사람은 무엇을 만들고, 듣는 사람들은 무엇을 듣고 있는 것일까요 우리는 무엇을 바라보고 무엇을 사랑하고 있는가요? 저는 어떤 결심으로 여러분 앞에 11년을 서 왔을까요 그런 말랑한 생각들을 해 보았습니다 결론은.. 한 번쯤 일독을 권합니다 (출간된 지 50년이 넘어 좀 낡은 관념들이 있긴 합니다만.) 세 달 정도 남았습니다. 퍼센트로는 18% 그 전에 죽기야 할까요. 건강하게 인사드려야죠 정신과 시간의 방.. 갈수록 중력이 무겁네요 짝대기가 네 개라 그런가 드럽게 안 가긴 합니다만, 국방부 시계는 거꾸로 매달아도 간다니까요. 거꾸로도 매달아보고 돌려도 보고 540도로도 달아보고 그럴랍니다 제 사랑도 마음도 잘 재정비해서 돌아오도록 하겠습니다 음악으로도 언어로도 들려드릴 이야기가 많네요 이제 봄입니다 봄이 오고 있습니다! (17cm 제설을 하며) 아 쫌 덥나? 싶으면 나가서 제가 저희가 계속 귀찮게 치근댈 예정이니 그전까지 갓생 사시길 바라겠읍니다 그럼 저는 보던 웹툰을 마저 보러 가보겠사와요 사랑합니다 오늘도 이건 결심이고 약속일 터입니다 보고싶슴다 초여름과 메뚜기떼 이놈들아 빨리 와 ! - 남준

V: 잠만 이 글 너무 명석해보이잖아 (https://weverse.io/bts/artist/0-156513041)

Is it spring outside? Hwacheon just got 17cm of snowfall. But I heard somewhere in Jeonbuk it's been above 20 degrees. South Korea truly is a country where the four seasons are all so clearly present, such a cool nation.

Umm Suddenly, one of my juniors has started making igloos in front of the barracks. I feel like I'm going to have so many memories to take away from this place Yeah.. It's a strange world.

At around this time, college students are probably going back to college, and school kids are probably starting a new semester. For me, finally, my days in the military have fallen to the double digits I feel like Robin Hood, crossing out the days on my calendar. Have I become a castaway? Maybe.. I might have

After we do the evening roll call, I always spend my leisure time reading. Recently, I read Erich Fromm's 'The Art of Loving', which I'd been meaning to read for a while. The art of loving, what on earth could that mean? Love as something that you have to work for.. that doesn't make sense. In a nutshell, this is what the book talks about: In order to be good at painting, or playing the guitar, or being good at studying, we practice hundreds of times to develop our skills. So then why, when it comes to love, the most important thing in a person's life, do we just try do it, with no skill, no practice?

In our modern world, love is something that's intensified by the media and capitalism, and only the drama of it is emphasised but, in reality, love is a determined resolution, a promise and a decision. There are probably many different types, and temperatures, and expressions of love. What about us? Not a one-to-one love, but a one-to-many or many-to-all love, what could we be? What does the person making music make, and what do the people listening to the music hear? What are we gazing at, what are we loving? With what resolution have I been standing in front of you for 11 years? I spent some time with these tender thoughts. The conclusion… I recommend reading the book. (It was published over 50 years ago though, so it does have some old-fashioned ideas)

Three months left now. In terms of percentages, that's 18%. Will I die before then? I'll be sure to greet you in good health. This hyperbolic time chamber… the further I go, the stronger gravity feels. Maybe it's because I have the four lines now.² They move so disgustingly slow, but the hands on the military clock do move, even if you hang the clock upside down. I'll try hanging it upside down, and turning the hands, and tilting it 540 degrees, I'm trying it all. I'll do my best to come back to you with my love and my heart reset.

I have so many things to tell you, both through music and through language. It's spring now, spring's coming! (After the 17cm of snow has been cleared) Right when you start to think "It's gotten kinda hot, hasn't it?" We'll be out and bothering you so much it gets annoying. Until then, I hope you guys are killin it. Okay, I'm gonna get back to the webtoon I was reading. I love you, today too, as always. This is both a resolution and a promise.

I miss you. Early summer, grasshoppers Can you guys please hurry up?!

-Namjoon

(T/N: *A reference from Dragon Ball Z

Referring to the stripes on his uniform, which indicate the rank of a sergeant.)

V: Wait this post sounds so intelligent

Trans cr; Aditi @ bts-trans © TAKE OUT WITH FULL CREDITS

V's Post ❇️ with RM & V's Comments 💬

눈이 왔습니다 제설 했습니다 눈싸움했습니다 눈싸움 잘합니다 병장 2호봉 됐습니다 이제 여기서 2위입니다 곧 서열 1위 최근에 특급전사됐습니다 운동 열심히 했습니다 열심히 하다가 갈비뼈 한번 나갔습니다 돌아왔습니다 지금은 다이어트합니다 70입니다 책 많이 읽었습니다 이나누나가 책 많이 주셨습니다 너무 많이 주셨습니다 다 못 읽겠습니다 여기서는 불면증이 없습니다 누우면 그냥 기절합니다 그래도 아침에 일어나는 건 도저히 익숙해지지 않습니다 아미 많이 보고싶어서 콘서트 영상 많이 봅니다 춤추고 싶습니다 노래 부르고 싶습니다 후임동생이 블랙스완 안무 다 땄다고 봐달라고 했습니다 제가 안무를 모릅니다 까먹었습니다 요즘 보물섬 봅니다 박형식 배우님 멋있습니다 정호석님 나 혼자 산다도 봤습니다 정호감입니다 콘서트 못가서 많이 아쉽습니다 아미 볼 수 있는 기회인데 어 음 아무튼 보고싶습니다! 사랑합니다!🩶

V: 어떤데 명석하나 RM: 누우면 기절? 개부럽다 RM: 김명석으로 앨범하나 내줘 (https://weverse.io/bts/artist/3-193728755)

It snowed. I cleared the snow out. I had a snowball fight. I'm quite good at snowball fights. I became a level 2 sergeant. I'm now the second highest rank here, soon I'll be the first. I recently became a special forces officer. I worked out really hard. I went so hard I broke a rib, it's fine now. I'm on a diet now. I'm 70 kilos. I've read a lot of books. Lee na nuna gave me lots of books. She gave me too many. I cannot read all of them. There is no insomnia here. I pass out as soon as I lie down. But I still find it so hard to get used to waking up in the morning. I miss ARMY a lot so I've been watching a lot of concert videos. I want to dance. I want to sing. A junior of mine said he learnt the whole Black Swan choreo and aksed me to watch. I don't know the choreo. I have forgotten it. I've been watching Buried Hearts lately. Mr. Park Hyungsik is such a cool actor. I watched Mr. Jung Hoseok's I Live Alone episode. I am now Jung Appreciation*. I was very sad that I couldn't go to the concert. It would have been a chance to see ARMY. And uhh yeah anyway I miss you! I love you!🩶

V: How was that, did it sound intelligent?

RM: You pass out as soon as you lie down? So jealous.

RM: You should release an album sometime as Kim Intelligent.

Picture translation: All I have is you

(T/N: A play on the words '호감', 'appreciation', and '영감', inspiration, which was mentioned during J-hope's 'I Live Alone' episode.)

V's Comments 💬 on ARMY's Post ❇️

💜: 김병장님… 제설 아닙니까..? 재설….? 제설이 아니였습니까 병장님 병장님이 이렇게 귀여워서 되나요 V: 그만하지? V: 실수였어요 (https://weverse.io/bts/fanpost/1-156530407)

💜: Sergeant Kim..is it not spelled 제설*..? 제설….? Wasn't it supposed to be 제설? Seargeant, seargant, are you allowed to be this cute?

V: Okay you can stop now.

V: It was a mistake.

(T/N: V initially misspelled the word '제설', 'snow clearing' in his Weverse post.)

💜: 거짓말 ㅋㅋ

V: 아 진챠로 ㅋ (https://weverse.io/bts/fanpost/4-193725419?anchor=4-370356021)

💜: Liar haha

V: It's trueee heh

Picture translation: All I have is you

Trans cr; Aditi @ bts-trans © TAKE OUT WITH FULL CREDITS

#250303 #v #taehyung #namjoon #rm #post #comment #letter from namjoon #weverse #hang in there joon #bts #bangtan

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ilyrafe · 8 months ago

Text

after seeing so much one direction content these past couple of days, it got me thinking. one direction really was the last boyband to ever happen. no one will ever come close to what they did in only six years. it’s a once in a generation kind of thing to happen. they didn’t even win the x factor and ended up being the show’s biggest act, 14 years later.

yes, they were manufactured, but at the same time, they were the least manufactured band to ever exist in recent times. they didn’t dance, they weren’t actually meant to be a band, they got everything they had because of charisma and talent. these boys were so talented and charismatic. they didn’t really dress the same, they were working class teenagers with a dream and they did it. and it was beautiful.

after seeing their statements, it’s finally downing on me that one direction is really over and i will never see all five of them together again. 11 year old me is absolutely devastated, and so is 24, almost 25 year old me.

the fangirl in me never went anywhere, it turns out. i still have my 1d concert tickets (the only one i went to and zayn was still in the band!), my albums and dvds, books, theater tickets and every once in a while i would take them out of the box and reminisce of the good old days, never thinking i would mourn one of them so soon. i genuinely thought i would be way older when they would go.

i can’t help but feel so sad that liam’s last years were so erratic and horrible. he was hurting deeply and he deeply hurt other people, and there is no excuse for what he did. i mourn what he once was, what he could have been and how it all ended up being. i take maya’s allegations seriously and i encourage you to do the same. what she is going through right now is impossible to imagine.

for those saying they’re glad “an abuser died”, think about what you’re saying. his death helps no one. his victims will never get justice, he will not take accountability for his actions. no one will ever get closure.

for those saying they feel bad for hating or mocking him, you really should. he was called an opportunist for showing up at the boys’ concerts and yet, when harry would do it, everyone loved it.

liam wasn’t perfect, he fucked up a lot, but like anyone, he had the right to, at the very least, apologize. 31 is too young, and no one deserves to go like this.

all i think about is his little son, who will grow up without his dad. no kid should ever lose their parent, especially at such an young age. the fact that he never once exposed his son to the media (like many celebrities do) to protect his privacy tells me that he loved his boy and knew all too well the damage this exposure would cause.

i saw that some 1d songs are trending again, and as much as i would love to take the day to listen to them, it is too soon. i haven’t been able to watch friends since matthew perry died, haven’t been able to watch brooklyn 99 since andre bragher died and will not be able to listen to 1d for a while.

it’s too soon.

call me dramatic, i don’t really care. the most magical part of my adolescence has ended tragically and i am really at a loss.

for those who are conflicted as i am, take your time. it is okay to be sad he’s gone and, at the same time, feel disappointed or even angry. it is okay to mourn and, at the same time, support maya.

edit: i would also like to express my support to his parents, sisters, cheryl, kate and friends.

#my tag #one direction #harry styles #liam payne #louis tomlinson #niall horan #zayn malik

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blueteller · 16 days ago

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Hi! Can you please tell me the cannon events of ogCale. I want to know about ogCale's life from his childhood till his death.

There are too much misinformation about him in the fandom. I can't decide anymore what is canon and what is fanon about ogCale anymore.

I would also like to hear your head-canons about ogCale's past.

You might want to check out this recent post of mine, concerning what is canon and what isn't about OG Cale's personality. As for the exact events? Let's see... (Big Spoilers Ahead!)

OG Cale was born in year 763 of Felix Calendar (the particulars of the calendar are never elaborated upon), in the main city of the Henituse Territory: Rain City or Weston, depending on translation. While the details of his childhood are never directly stated, it's implied to be a happy upbringing by his parents, until the death of his mother Jour/Drew Thames (Jour was first proposed version of the name and I'm personally partial to it over EAP's "Drew") sometimes around the year 771. Jour got into a carriage accident when coming back from Harris Village, where she split her own plate and hid half of her Anciet Power, the Annual Rings of Life, making it seem like it was the carriage crash was the cause of her death. OG Cale only found out the truth about the even after he made the deal with the God of Death many years later.

Within one year Deruth Henituse, Cale's father, met and married Violan, whose past is mostly unknown aside from the fact that she comes from a merchant family (which raises all sorts of red flags, considering how the Hunters like to disguise themselves as merchants, but it might just be red herring) and that she had a son named Basen/Bassen from an unknown previous relationship (no mention whether she was married or not). Basen is 3 years younger than Cale, so he had to be born in 766, and shares no blood relation with him as his step brother (although Kim Rok Soo!Cale is unaware of this fact for most of the story, as he never was given any details about OG Cale' mother and her death). Deruth and Violand had another child named Lily/Lilly, Cale's half-sister, who was born in 774, 3 years into their marriage, when OG Cale was 11.

We know that in year 771 Basen and Cale had a conversation where OG Cale told him to pretend to be Deruth's biological son. From that point on, he did his best to act like "trash", aka. a spoiled brat, with the explicit goal to be kicked out of the family and pass the heir position to his step brother. In year 778, when OG Cale was 15, he added drinking to his personna and became known as an alcoholic with low alcohol tolerance and terrible, violent temper when drunk. It continued that way until year 783, when 18-year-old OG Cale met Choi Han, on his way to report the Harris Village massacre that occured on March 28th ("third month of the year" to be exact, but we never got any direct confirmation that that months were named differently in this universe, so whatever). "Drunk" OG Cale insulted the dead villagers to Choi Han's face, possibly because he was being "in-character", but canonically also because he hates Harris Village as the place where his mother died. Which lead to OG Cale's brutal beatdown documented in "The Birth of a Hero" series, Volume 1.

Now, let me dive into that for a bit, because there seems to be a huge misunderstanding about the following events among the fandom.

I carefully re-read the beginning of the novel recently (the official translation that is, mostly to see if there were any major differences from what I remembered of EAP's translation), trying to fish out as many details as possible about the TBOAH timeline. One intersting thing about OG Cale's introduction in the books that Kim Rok Soo read is that he did not actually appear just once. He was not a recurring character mind you, nothing particular being mentioned about him or the Henituse family after the first Volume, but it was clearly stated Choi Han "bumped into him a couple of times" before their final confrontation.

The way I see it, the timeline of TBOAH probably like this: Choi Han must have passed a bar where OG Cale was having a huge public tantrum over his wine not tasting good, causing it to be mentioned in TBOAH, which was written from Choi Han's POV. It probably did not count as a meeting though, with Choi Han having no reason to actually enter the bar. But that tantrum caused OG Cale to injure himself with a piece of broken table leg, making KRS!Cale notice that he did not have a scar on his side when he transmigrated; a specific detail which allowed him to place his position in the TBOAH timeline.

We don't know what Choi Han did for the next couple of days; possibly he spent looking for something to eat, a place to rest, or asking for information about where was the man in charge and how he should approach him. Maybe he spent time in the slums, met some homeless kids along the way (the reason why Cale had a specific quote in mind about them when he met On and Hong), got into some fight where he showed his fighting prowess (more on that in a bit), possibly went past the Man Eating Tree, prompting its backstory regardless of the fact that no one got the Indestructible Shield Ancient Power in the TBOAH timeline (at least, not within the first 5 Volumes which Kim Rok Soo had read). Kim Rok Soo never thought about the narration seeming too strange, and he's an observant guy. So it must have felt like natural exposition for the audience. Perhaps Choi Han met Billos/Bilose Flynn as well, prompting his introduction and backstory.

What we know for sure is that OG Cale and Choi Han had their "first meeting" the next day after Choi Han jumped over the wall (missing Hong and twisting his ankle as the result, slowing down his progress on top of physical and emotional exhaustion), while OG Cale was out and drinking. But I think it also makes sense to assume they did not exchange words just yet, as Choi Han was in full depression mode at the time had no reason to be chatty. It's possible OG Cale just threw a casual insult at him, reinforcing Choi Han's terrible impression of him. In other words, they had at least one "meeting" by that point in the timeline, but OG Cale did not get beat up just yet.

In TCF, Deruth also mentioned that "Cale would leave for the capital in five days", causing Cale to think how "OG Cale would get beat up in four days time", delaying the actual confrontation of these two from Choi Han's initial arrival quite lot - about a week, in fact!

Here's what I pieced together: in order for Choi Han to meet the Count he had to find way to get past the guards, without showing an identification or fighting them, which he was actively trying to avoid (his conscience recovered enough for him to remember not to kill innocent people regardless of his rage). So the meeting was no accident: he must have approached OG Cale on purpose, knowing that he was the son of the local Count. He probably asked for help regarding the Harris Village directly to OG Cale in hope that the man would be sympathetic enough to let him meet his father (not a very good plan, but probably the best one he had at the time). We also know it happened on a rainy day, and it did NOT rain when Cale first met Choi Han in TCF, nor the day after when he got the Shield, which took a couple days of buying bread for Cale to acquire (and when he finally did was only foggy, presumably because of On helping, but not raining!). After Cale got his Shield, it was explicitly stated that it rained heavily for a several days in a row; like during Cale's talk with Billos about his father. Once the rain passed, Cale was satisfied with the fact that the deadline for his beating had passed and he successfully avoided that fate.

So... Choi Han must have spent a full week in Rain City before he beat up OG Cale (minimum of 3 days of Cale buying bread, and 4 consecutive rainy days), unlike many fans seem to believe; the generall impression I get is that Choi Han stayed in the city for barely a day or two before moving on.

We also know that Beacrox/Vicross Molan met Choi Han exactly four days earlier in TCF than in TBOAH. Which leads me directly to the bottom of the misunderstanding I mentioned earlier.

In TBOAH, after Choi Han beat up OG Cale, there did not seem to be any legal complications for him; no mention of him paying a fine, since he was homeless and poor he couldn't have afforded it, and no mention of guards trying to arrest him. Either no guards witnessed the confrontation, or they chose not to help OG Cale. I find the second option hard to believe though, since what we have seen in TCF seems to indicate that despite OG Cale's behavior, the Henituse Territory's knights were quite loyal and competent. I think they probabably didn't see nor hear anything BECAUSE of the rain. Someone could make an argument that Beacrox COULD have seen something, but that's highly unlikely; instead, I think Choi Han must have had a fight with someone else, because it was mentioned that Cale wanted Choi Han and Beacrox to bond over Choi Han impressing him with his strength. I don't see how "impressive" it would be to see Choi Han beating up OG Cale, who was completely ordinary in strength... I think that's where the common misunderstanding among the fans lies.

To sum it up: I am fully convinced there was no one around when Choi Han beat up OG Cale. It was raining, OG Cale was too stubborn to admit defeat or to call out for help, and Choi Han was never arrested. I'm 100% certain there was no witnesses, especially not Beacrox.

And beside that, if we sum up days, we reach another crusial conclusion: Choi Han met Beacrox before approaching OG Cale.

It only makes sense from the timeline! When I mentioned earlier that during the week that Choi Han spent in the city, "he possibly got into some fight where he showed his fighting prowess", that is what I meant. Either Choi Han got into a fight with some thugs (which do exist despite the Henituse Territory not having a criminal underground; TBOAH narrative clearly states that OG Cale liked to terrorize thugs instead of bothering innocent people), and Beacrox happened to see it, or they bumped into each other and fought personally. Possibly both.

Choi Han's exact TBOAH activities might not seem all that relevant to the original question regarding OG Cale, here's where we come back to the main point. Namely: Ron and Beacrox leaving OG Cale behind to travel with Choi Han.

Since Ron was such an important figure in OG Cale's life, we can imagine him leaving (wihtout a goodbye or warning, no less) affected him quite a bit. But fans like to make extra drama, and somehow created this narrative where 1) Beacrox sees Choi Han beating up OG Cale and doen't stop him, and 2) Ron leaves OG Cale with the guy that harmed his charge without any care in the world. Which simply does not add up at all! This is the reason why I think that there were no witnesses when Choi Han beat up OG Cale: Ron absolutely would have tried to avenge him!! For his own professional pride if nothing else - he wouldn't have simply left with Choi Han if he knew!!!

Yes, Ron and Beacrox were under the impression that Choi Han was involved with Arm, due to him "having their scent" (more of my exact thoughts on that in this post). So they decided to follow him not because they LIKED him, but because they found him useful. Their comradery developed slowly and gradually after that misunderstanding got resolved and got to trust him more (and Choi Han lightened up a bit after the events in Harris Village). But I'mstill pretty sure they never found out about Choi Ha being the one who beat up the guy they worked for over a decade. The Henituse had always been generous with them, and aside from OG Cale's bratty behavior they really had no reasons to complain. And no matter his protagonist status, Choi Han certainly wasn't "charming" enough to make them forget all of their gratitude out of the blue.

You might be thinking, "but how could they not figure it out"? Well... OG Cale was known for causing trouble. Someone beating him up around the same time that Choi Han was in town? Doesn't mean much. And Deruth wouldn't have let it slide either! If he had any idea what Choi Han had done to his son (remember, he beat him up NEAR DEATH), Deruth would have never sent Hans to help with the proper burial of the villagers! That kind of gesture of good will just doesn't make sense, no matter how tragic the massacre was. OG Cale was clearly found and brought in for healing, Choi Han got the audience he wanted with the Count, OG Cale wasn't around to make any comments on it because he was stuck in bed, and Basen went to the capital for Zed's birthday instead in his older brother's place.

Then the terrorist attack happened, and the rest of 5 Volumes of TBOAH happened, followed by the Henituse Territory invasion by Clopeh Sekka... 20 years of war, erased from the timeline by the transmigration deal with the God of Death... and the rest is history.

So, here's the quick summary of my long, LONG post about what exactly is canon regarding OG Cale:

OG Cale was born in 763 (no exact month of birth confirmed)

His mother died in 771 (when he was 8)

Deruth remarried same year, Violan and 5-year-old Basen becoming Henituses

OG Cale started acting as a spoiled brat to help his step family

He added alcoholism to his personna in 778 (15 years old)

He met Choi Han in 781 a couple of times (18 years old); first time probably sometime 1st of April, and got beat up around 5th-6ths, around 1 week after the massacre of Harris Village on March 28th,

He probably spent the next 2 years trying to get himself kicked out from the family but Deruth nor Violan ever allowed it (because their love was unconditional)

Henituse Territory fell in spring of 783 to the Indomitable Alliance of the northern countries, officially lead by Clopeh Sekka of Paerun Kingdom

He transmigrated around 803 (40 years old), becoming 36-year-old Team Leader Kim Rok Soo

What fans commonly misunderstand and get mixed up:

Choi Han did not beat up OG Cale upon their first meeting

Beacrox did not see OG Cale getting beat up nor stood on idly the sidelines watching

Ron probably never found out Choi Han was the one who beat up his charge either

Neither did Deruth or anyone important someone would have tried to arrest Choi Han or at the very least fine or blacklist him from Rain City, none of which got mentioned in TCF

So Ron and Beacrox did not merrily set off into the sunset with the guy who beat up OG Cale, they left to keep an eye on the suspicious guy who smelled like Arm (Beacrox liked sparring with him but that was just a side bonus)

We do not know whether Basen died or got hurt in the terrorist attack as it was never explained in TBOAH, we just know he had to be there instead of OG Cale

It is implied that all the Henituses aside from OG Cale died during the invasion, but the how any why was never explored so anything about that topic is pure speculation from the fanbase

OG Cale fought in the war later but his exact role was never elaborated on either

I hope you find this helpful! Have a good day everyone 💖

[Bonus: I forgot to adress one last thing: the scene OG Cale witnessed in the final battle. OG Cale saw the White Star grab Choi Han by the arm (not the neck unlike most fanart of that scene!) and say the line about his time being warped. There is no mention whether OG Cale have ever actually met the White Star before that point, and there is no information regarding their relation (which is implied because of how similar they look and how White Star was able to use the Annual Rings of Life, which could be only used by the Thames). So anything about OG Cale's family is still yet to be adressed in canon. OG Cale's unknown relative (possibly uncle because of Jour mentioning her brother) showed up exactly ONCE, and he never even showed his real face. So everything connected to that stuff is still only theories and all.]

#tcf #trash of the count's family #lcf #lout of count's family #q&a #replies #og cale #og cale henituse #original cale henituse #tcf meta #tcf analysis

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miley1442111 · 1 year ago

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hi! can you do something with aaron and like a younger next-door neighbour and they're kinda secretly and newly dating and something with Jack goes wrong and reader helps fix it so aaron is just so in love and asks if he can tell jack and it's just super fluffy and cute!

Anyway, thank you so much, i love your writing!!!!

i love this idea so much!

--------------------------------

telling him- a.hotchner

--------------------------------

a/n: i got nothin.

summary: jack can't go to school, so you swoop in and become aaron's hero, he asks two pretty important questions.

pairing: aaron hotchner x reader

warnings: none

--------------------------------

Aaron didn’t know what to do with himself. He’d left the BAU. Jack was 11. He had a pre-teen who he’d just moved across the country and changed his entire life.

What the fuck were they doing in San Francisco?

Aaron was a lecturer now, on law in Stanford. Jack attended a new school, much to his dismay.

And then there was you. The gorgeous woman who lived next door to them. You were a lecturer as well, nuclear physics but you were often mistaken for a student, considering you were only 25. You’d been very kind to him since he started work there, and even had had them over for dinner a couple of times.

--------------------------------

“I don’t wanna go!” Jack exclaimed, arms crossed.

“Jack, I have work in 45 minutes, my students are taking the bar exam, and you know your babysitter is out of town, you have to go to school,” he sighed, feeling helpless. Doing this alone had been the hardest part. He had to leave the family he had, the entire team, and his life behind.

“But they’re mean!” he sobbed into his dad’s chest. “They make fun of me for not having a mom…”

Aaron’s heart broke. He didn’t want to send his kid into school if he was being bullied, and he made a mental note to speak to his teachers.

“Hey guys,” your kind voice filled the house from downstairs. Aaron had given you a key just a few weeks ago. “Ready to go?”

Aaron looked at the time on his watch, it was exactly when you all carpooled to school, then work.

“Up here!” Jack shouted down to you as he cried into his dad’s shoulder, ruining his suit. Aaron could hear your footsteps up the stairs and he braced himself for any judgy looks.

Judgy looks which never came.

“Poor Jack,” you sighed, rubbing his head. “What’s going on?”

“The kids at school laugh at me because I don't have a mommy anymore,” he cried, getting up and giving you a hug. You sent Aaron an empathetic look and hugged Jack back.

“That is awful Jack, how about this. You come to work with me and your dad, my lectures don’t start ‘till later so you can hang out with me and I know someone who works at your school, so if you tell me your teacher’s name I can get the lesson plan for today and we can work through it in my office, does that sound good?”

Jack nodded his head furiously and hugged you harder, his tears subsiding.

Aaron’s heart could’ve exploded. You were so kind. You two had only been on a few dates in recent weeks, you hadn’t told Jack yet, but you were so caring.

He mouthed a ‘thank you’ in your direction and you shrugged. ‘It’s the least I can do’.

Aaron ran into his room, pulling on a new suit jacket to replace the one soiled by Jack’s tears, grabbed his briefcase, and followed you out to the car. You’d called your friend at his school and gotten the information so Jack had his school books in his bag. You drove them to the Stanford campus, explained to your supervisor who told you it was alright, and departed for the day, Jack’s hand in yours. Aaron walked over to his building, and you stayed in yours, sending him updates throughout the day. You made the majority of your lectures for the day either study lectures, or just cancelled lectures so you could keep a close eye on Jack. You even allowed three of your most responsible students to teach Jack some maths.

At the end of the day, Jack fell asleep on the couch in your office while you were busy cleaning up your lecture hall.

“Hi honey,” Aaron smiled from the door.

“Hi love,” you smiled back. “How was your day? Did anyone faint in the exam hall?”

He crossed over to you in three quick strides and pulled you into his arms, kissing you deeply. You were so kind, you’d taken care of Jack all day for him, you’d made him feel less alone in the most isolating time of his life, and you were his. Well, maybe, he hadn’t exactly asked yet. “No one fainted, but a few did vomit before coming in.”

“Poor them,” you sighed. “Jack was fine all day, no issues.”

“Have I told you how wonderful you are?” He smiled and you chuckled.

“A few times, sure,” you teased. “But I don’t mind hearing it again.”

Aaron smiled and moved one of his hands to cup your cheek. “You’re wonderful.”

You smiled back at him, pecking his cheek. “Well, good thing we have a date on Friday.”

“I want to tell Jack,” He admitted. “About us.”

You nodded. “You’re sure? It’s only been a couple of weeks.”

“I’m sure. He loves you anyways, what’s the worst that can happen?” He asked, pressing kisses to your neck as he spoke.

“Umm- He could hate both of us because he feels like we’re replacing your and Haley’s relationship, he could start to resent you if we break up, he could hate me, the list goes on-”

“Don’t let it,” he smiled. “I have spent my whole life making calculated and deliberate decisions, even if I knew those choices wouldn’t make me happy. I want to be happy now, with you and Jack,” he admitted. In recent months you’d taught him the value of being slightly selfish, despite his altruistic tendencies.

“Alright, whatever you say love,” you smiled and kissed him again, then went back to your desk to gather your things.

“I also want to ask you something,” he stated and when you turned around you saw a bouquet of your favourite flowers in his hands. “Will you be my girlfriend?”

You chuckled softly and smiled, the sweetness of the moment warming your heart. “Yes, Aaron, I will be your girlfriend.”

He grinned when you accepted and his hands wrapped around your waist as he pressed your lips against his in celebration.

He was happy, truly happy. For the first time in a long time.

And it was all thanks to you.

--------------------------------

criminal minds masterlist :)

navigation for my blog :) (criminal minds, obx, the bear, marvel, top gun, the hunger games, challengers :)

#criminal minds #criminal minds imagine #bau team #criminal minds fandom #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds fic #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner fluff #aaron hotchner #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotch hotchner #aaron hotchner imagine #aaron hotch imagine #aaron hotch fanfiction

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howi99 · 3 months ago

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The Nest chapter 5

13 yo Adam: *waking up, not feeling the burning sensation on his face anymore* What the-

???: Oh, you're awa-

Adam: *picking up the first thing he could find, brandishing it as a weapon towards the voice*

11 year old Jaune: *looking unimpressed by said "weapon"* You know, i think it's the first time someone tried to threaten me with a porn book.

Adam: *looking at his hands, seeing the cover of Ninja of love* AH! *Drop the book in pure disgust*

Jaune: *picking it up, posing it back on the nightstand* It's actually quite the good read-

Adam: *trying his best to get as far away of Jaune, which was complicated since the bed was against the wall* WHO!? WHERE?!

Jaune: *perplexed* ... Dude, you are like twice as muscled as me. Heck, i'm probably more in danger than you are-

Adam: *snarl, looking ready to fight*

Jaune: *putting his hands in the air with a timid smile* See? No weapon! Just, calm down and-

Adam: *tries attacking Jaune, who grabs his arm and use the momentum to throw the other kid on the ground* Argh!?!

Jaune: *sigh, twisting the arm of the angry teenager behind its back*

Adam: *trying to move around but being unable to do so as Jaune used aura to strengthen himself* L-let me go!

Jaune: *deadpan* You just tried attacking me! Fuck no i wont!

Adam: *angrily* You humans are all the same! Taking pleasure in hurting us! *Trying to move even more so and again, failing* GET OFF ME!

Jaune: *annoyed* Hey, i just fucking saved your eye you stupid bull! The least you could say is thank you!

Adam: LET ME- *realising what Jaune just said* ... Uh? *Blinking, then closing each eye one at a time* What-

Jaune: *feeling the bull faunus weaken his attempt to escape* Shit man, took you long enough.

Adam: *looking around, seeing the inside of a tent* ... This isn't the mine?

Jaune: *sigh, releasing him, dusting himself* Tell me, what would i be doing in a fucking mine? Do i look like a god damn employee to you?!

Adam: *quickly getting up, still wary of the other kid* ... No?

Jaune: *sigh again, pointing the bed* Sit down, there's a shit tone you need to know.

_ _ _

Adam: *touching the almost invisible scar on his eye, looking himself in a mirror* That's... Woah..

12 years old Vernal: *grinning* Not bad, eh? Jaune's semblance is the shit, man! Can heal almost anything as long as it's recent enough!

Adam: *looking back at the teen talking to the weird lady* So you guys-

Vernal: *cutting him with a smile, looking proud* Are badass? Awesome? Exactly like Robin Hood?

Adam: *deadpan* I was going to say "you guys are the bandits i've heard of?"

Vernal: ... Really? We save you and that's all we get?! *Annoyed* Fucking transported you on my back for not even a thank you!?!

Adam: *nervous* I-i mean-

Raven: *walking towards them* So, kid, how do you feel?

Adam: *a bit (lot) intimidated by the woman dressed in war gear* I-i uh-huh-

Raven: *confused* What's wrong with you? You got a concussion or what?... *Looking at Jaune, worried* He didn't have a head injury, right?

Jaune: *shaking his head* Nope, just a dumbass who can't think before acting.

Adam: *glaring at Jaune* You- *sees the big grin on Jaune's face, seeing his lack of seriousness* ... *Sigh* Yeah, i'm fine.

Raven: *nod* Good. You were too hurt to be sent with the first batch, but the white fang should be back in about 3 months to take the others.

Adam: *confused* ... What?

Raven: *looking back at Jaune again* You didn't explain him?

Jaune: Yeah, but i think he was too focused on playing with his scar instead of listening... *Shrug* Which i mean, i'd probably do the same, not gonna lie.

Adam: What's going on?

Raven: *sigh* In short, we raid mines in exchange for food from the white fang. They'll also bring you to menagerie, since you're still a kid.

Adam: ... *Shaking his head* Man, can't believe i was saved by a bunch of humans. Criminals no less.

Jaune: Hey, it's not like we are a bunch of killers. *Smirk* Human, faunus, it doesn't matter much when the law wants you dead, right?

Adam: I... Guess not? Huh... Never thought about it that way before.

Raven: Ah! Can't blame you! *Smirk* It's hard to think about others when you're suffering.

Adam: *looking at both Jaune and Raven's smirk* ... You both have that same punchable face.

Vernal: *nod* You think so too, huh?

#rwby #rwby au #jaune arc #adam taurus #vernal #raven branwen #from the nest au

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bamsywrites · 8 months ago

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And Comes Dawn pt 11

Pairing: Sauron/Halbrand x Reader

Summary: The Deciever has a question for his Sweet One.

Tags: fluff. Like FLUFF. He may be deranged but he's got a soft spot. Also, told you I was gonna make the Annatar bow angsty.

Notes: the fic is out of order now because I have a lot going on and ITS MY FIC OK OK. Not having to have everything in order has given me so much inspo that within the next 24 hours there could be 2 more parts and 2 other things too soo. I love you all. Thank you for your support. My dms and inbox are always open, also if you wanna give me like a lil tip it would be appreciated.

Halbrand leaned against the archway to the library and watched you as you read through the scrolls and histories. It's how you'd spent your days since coming to Eregion. He worked on the elven rings, and you were here, reading. It was endearing to him that you sought knowledge in such a way. Proof that he had made the right choice in you.

There had to be three. Just as there had to be three rings.

Him with his power and darkness.

Galadriel with her wisdom and light.

You with your goodness and warmth to balance them out.

Three.

Though, he only desired you. Only loved you. You were what he was doing all this for. He had to create a lasting peace. He had to make Middle Earth safe and perfect. He had to overcome this pesky issue of your mortality. He could not allow you to live in a broken world. He would not allow you to come to harm, and, selfishly, perhaps, he could not let you die. The rings were for you. His ambitions and goals revolved around you.

All for you.

At least, that is what he made himself believe. If he was truly honest, he had different motives as well. Motives of power and control. Motives that would have driven him down this path if you'd never met. His deception was so great that he was able to hide that away. He was able to believe the ends justified the means. And if you were what was at the end, there was no depravity he could not justify.

Watching you now, you were breathtaking with your eyes focused and strands of hair falling in your face. You'd taken full advantage of the beautiful wardrobe and styles of the elves. Intricate, delicate strands of silver were braided through your hair. You wore a dress of light blue with more silver, and the delicate chains only served to accentuate your curves. He had thought you were beautiful in the Numenorian garb, but now you looked stunning. Breathtaking. He'd seen the most beautiful of the elves, the Silmarils, the light of creation. Yet you were greater than them all.

“I know you're there,” you spoke, the ghost of a smile playing at your lips, but your eyes never moved from the page.

“And yet you stare only at your books. My heart can not help but break.” He teased. “I will not be shamed for staring at the most beautiful woman I have ever laid my eyes on.”

He smirked at your blush, approaching you and wrapping his arms around you from behind. He noticed that the back half of your hair was pulled up and tied into a bow. He chuckled softly and rested his chin on your shoulder. “What do you read now?”

“A tale of a human and elf falling in love,” you relaxed into his embrace.

He pressed a kiss to your shoulder, your neck, up to your cheek before turning your head so he could capture your lips in a soft kiss. “Last week, it was the fall of elven cities. This week, it's romance. You never cease to amaze me.”

“You are easily amazed, then.”

“Do not doubt yourself, sweet one.” He pressed a kiss to your nose, turning you around in his arms and lifting you to sit on the edge of the table. “I am in awe of you always, but recently, I'm in awe of these things you do with your hair. A bow?” He teased softly, pressing his forehead to yours.

“Do you not like it,” The way you looked up at him, seeking his approval, it mirrored the expression you wore when you were on your knees begging for him. His fingers tightened on your hips, restraining from taking you on the table.

“I do. It suits you.” He smiles softly, his eyes softening as he sees your bright smile.

“Perhaps you could grow your hair, and I can do it to you. I've seen elves of all kind wear it,” there was an excitement to your voice as you spoke.

He chuckled, “Perhaps one day, if we are parted, I will wear it as a reminder of you when my heart yearns for you.”

“You jest.”

“I do no such thing. You have plenty of things to remember me by,” his fingers traveled down to the intricate necklace of copper he'd made for you at the forge in Numenor. You always wore it. “I shall have the hair bow.”

You frowned, and his thumb traced the downward turn of your lips, his head tilted in a silent question. “Perhaps if I were to have more coin, I could get you something. Perhaps…”

Your words were muffled as he pressed a kiss to your lips. His hands held your face as he deepened it. It was only when he felt his body react that he pulled away. His nose brushed yours. “You have given me more than enough.”

You smiled up at him, face flushed and lips swollen. His thumb gently caressed your cheeks.

“I don't intend to ever be parted from you,” he whispered softly, tucking your hair behind your ears. “I mean it.”

He pulled away, searching his pockets for a moment before pulling out a ring. It had a silver band and a small blue gem at the center. He knew it was more than a simple band. He knew of the power he placed in it. The materials he snuck from the forge to add to it. It would need to be perfected in time to come, but for now, it would do what he needed it to. It would increase your lifespan, heal your wounds faster, and It created a connection with him, wherever you were.

It also served as a symbol. That you were his. That his feelings for you were real. His intentions were true.

He looked at it for a moment before looking at you. “ In elven culture, it's customary to give your betrothed a silver ring that you wear until marriage. At that time, they were traded for gold bands. I added a bit more. A gem as blue as the waters that brought us together.”

You gasped softly, looking at the ring and then to him.

“It's the custom of your people to ask the family but you have none. The family who warded you is gone as well. I have no one to ask for your hand but you. As such, I felt that I should give you the same proposal in which I would have given your father.”

He stood up straight, one hand on your chin directing you to look at him. “You fill me with a warmth I've never known. I no longer know who I am if not with you. I was lost and astray, without hope or purpose. It was as if the gods themselves put you on my path. You are a beacon of hope, your smile my purpose. There is nothing I would not do for you, no trial I would not face. I love you. I adore you. I have never thought of children until I met you, and now I know I want to make you a mother. I want to make you my wife.”

He brushed away a tear that had fallen from your eyes, “I give you the choice, I would never force anything upon you. Do you want that? Do you want me?” He took a deep breath, shaking his head. “Fuck, I'm so nervous I can't talk. Just tell me, yes or no? Will you marry me?”

You laughed, nodding your head. He slid the ring onto your finger before lifting you and twirling you around. As he set you down, you looked at the ring on your finger.

“I never thought I'd be betrothed. I never thought I'd choose who I could marry.” You smiled up at him, and it filled him with joy unimaginable.

“I never thought I'd give a woman a romantic speech or truly want to settle down.” He rested his forehead against yours once more. “I'm a changed man thanks to you. Near unrecognizable to that drifter on the raft.”

“That is true. You will be a king soon.” You gasped suddenly as a realization dawned on you. “ I'm going to be a queen. Me? A queen” you laughed softly at the thought.

He chuckled, pressing a quick kiss to your lips. “That is true. As soon as my business here is done, we can return to the southlands and be wed, and you can meet all your subjects.”

You wrinkled your nose, “I'm not sure I like the thought of having subjects.”

“Of course you don't, “ he rolled his eyes but didn't stop smiling. “Why don't we go back to our chambers, and I can show you how devoted of a subject I am?”

Your cheeks turned red, and you buried your face in his neck. He placed a kiss on your head, “I'll kneel and worship my queen.”

“Halbrand,” you spoke, pulling back and giving him a look.

“I'll fill you with my warmth.”

"Stop it!” You smacked his arm,causing him to laugh deeply and wrap his arms around you for a tight hug.

#halbrand x reader #sauron x reader #halbrand x oc #sauron x oc #trop fanfiction #trop x reader #rings of power x reader #rings of power fanfiction

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bernardsbendystraws · 1 year ago

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━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒕 𝒛𝒐𝒏𝒆

⚠︎ mdni, smut, alcohol abuse, parental neglect, overall mature themes, and more [ this is made for all parts ]

⤷ Get to reading, sluts. No copying. Ask if you’d like to use this as ‘inspiration.’ Fuck off and fuck me, lets get horny!!!

with love and big tits, Rose Toy

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Chapter 11: Lost In The Memory

Matt’s hand cradled mine gently. He applied the nail paint meticulously as the delicate brush left behind a smooth layer of color on my nails. His touch was comforting and precise. The sensation of the wet polish contrasted from the warmth of his hands against mine.

He was completely absorbed in the task as he painted my nails with precision. His tongue continued prodding from the corner of his mouth in concentration. He occasionally darted the pad of his thumb along the surrounding skin of my nails, swiftly brushing away any mishaps.

The paint coated my nails in a shiny green finish. The color cornered my thoughts to Marylou’s garden.

She had told me how it would be a couple of weeks before anything truly bloomed. I didn’t mind–I was still excited to see the vibrant plants come to life. As a token of gratitude, she had also given me a gift.

Three small leaves littered on a thick stem inside of a modest ceramic pot. An easy plant to take care of according to her. She had explained to me that it needed to be watered every couple of days, but it was hard to kill.

I looked over, seeing the pot sat on my nightstand with the two Lego frogs placed in front of it. The blue and green trinkets and lively plant stood out when quickly glancing over my room, but I liked it.

I have recently been getting better sleep at night. The spring weather had replaced the bitter cold with a soft night breeze. My blanket did enough to shield my body from the sullen wind.

But, the weather wasn’t the only reason for my body being able to relax into the metal springy mattress. The small decoration made the room seem more cozy–or maybe less prison-like.

I had reached for the frogs each morning and night as if they were pets. I pat softly on their head alone in my room, imaging Matt doing the same thing as I drifted off to sleep.

“There…” Matt puts the brush back into the bottle, screwing on the top. “Now, we just need to wait for it to dry.” He reaches out, placing the small glass bottle on my nightstand.

“Thanks,” I look down, admiring the summery green hue that coats my nails. “--I really love them.” I express myself softly. I look up, seeing Matt staring at me with a smile.

Our knees touch as we sit criss-cross on my bed. He pulls both of my hands in his own, blowing out air on my nails. My spine feels tired as I adjust my back straighter.

“Want me to sit behind ya?” he asks. I nod my head with a sheepish smile. He got up, stalking behind me. “Fuck.” I hear him mutter as a thud echoes through the room. He holds his knee before bending down to the floor.

“What is this?” My eyes go wide as I see the leather journal in his hands, my mom’s journal. I clasp the book quickly into my hands, setting it on my nightstand. “Got a secret journal under your mattress, hm?” he teases.

I shake my head as I let out a dry laugh. I feel him sit behind me before his hands grasp at my hips, tugging me until my back presses against his chest. His legs cage around me as I lean my head back on his chest. I feel him grab my hands before placing my palms flat on top of his slightly bent knees.

“It’s–uh, it’s not mine, actually.” I state. His eyes sink down to me before his hand brushes a stray hair behind my ear. “--it’s, um, it’s my mom’s.” I explain.

His face contorts with confusion as he looks at me briskly. I avert my eyes, glancing around the room. My eyes feel stuck on the empty walls, noticing all the chips and scratches of the withered paint.

I feel his fingertip bring me back to the present moment. The pad of his pointed finger grazes the skin of my neck lightly. I feel the subtle outline of a smiley face on my birthmark as I try to contain my smile.

“I haven’t read it. My dad…he was gonna throw it away. I guess I just wanted another piece of her? I don’t know…” I sigh. My shoulders sink with the heavy breath. I feel Matt’s fingers retract. My skin continues to crawl on the spot his warm hands were tracing.

I feel the palms of his hands rest on my shoulders. I see him leaning down out of the corner of my eye. I turn my face, my stomach swarming with fuzzy warmth as I meet his soft gaze.

He leans in, his lips puckering against my cheek with a swift kiss. I fight back the burning tundra of heat crawling up from my neck. His eyes are fluttering closed as his head curves downward. The delicate graze of his nose lingers on my burning cheeks as I bite the inside of my cheek.

“I get it.” he says. The reassurance calms my nerves as I take a deep breath. So soft, so quiet, so little, yet his words were enough. As I let my body relax, I appreciate the heating radiating off of him from behind me.

I stared at the leather journal, wanting to hear her voice through her written words. I didn’t wanna intrude and invade her privacy. Not like it mattered very much anyway–but a journal was private. However, frustration had built up in the pit of my gut time after time due to every failed conversation with my dad.

Only two more times. I had only tried two more times, but they had both hurt just as bad as the first. It was the bitter taste of defeat, but not from losing a fight–from not having a fight at all.

“My dad won’t ever talk about her. Hell–he won’t even really talk to me.” I grit out. The anger rages with a tightening heat in my chest.

The feeling subsides as soon as I see Matt’s smile falter. A subtle frown pulls on his lips. Fuck, I ruined it. Guilt consumes me as my mind panics.

I ruined it. I fucking ruined it.

The once sweet moment that felt like a sun beaming down on an early summer day had been dulled down to a flickering light of a broken lamp. I cleared my throat, pushing back the thoughts.

I force myself to give him a small smile, to which his eyebrows furrow inward. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to ruin the mood.” I express. He shakes his head, looking down.

My heart sinks at the sight of his disapproval. The feeling of guilt drags me to the ground with heavy chains. The familiar pull had made an appearance countless times before, but never to this extent.

Maybe that was just because I hadn’t seen him like this. Maybe, it was because I hadn't made him feel like this.

His head lifts upwards until his eyes meet mine. He looks at me like he’s looking through me. It should feel intimidating, but it doesn’t. It feels like he’s looking at me to see me–to really see me.

“You’re not ruining anything,” he says. The softness of his voice makes the silky words sink through my system like a leaf in the wind. He makes it seem so easy.

His reassurance washes over me. I feel my lungs scream for air as I take in a shaky breath, not realizing I had been holding out as I waited for his reaction. The fuzzy warmth beckons my mind to stay present, grounding me as I let myself look and take in his serene eyes gleaming down at me.

“You sure?” I remark. My voice is playful, but the words hold meaning as I lick my lips in anticipation for his response. I watch as his eyes squint down at me, a smirk plastering on his face.

His hands move up from my hips, tangling around my front. He laces his hands in one another as his arms embrace me from behind. He envelopes me closer to him, burying his face in the crook of my neck.

The sudden ticklish sensation starts as his nose drives lightly over my skin. I squirm, but he holds me securely as giggles erupt from my lips. I keep my hands carefully still on top of his bent knees.

“Never been so sure of something in my life, sweetheart.” he says.

His hot breath meets my neck with a heat that seems to seep into my cheeks. I bite down on my bottom lip as I feel his soft lips enclose around my neck. The sound of his lips kissing my skin reaches my ears, the wet sound making my mouth water.

“--can’t believe I get to call you mine.” The hum from his mouth vibrates as his lips trail wet kisses down to my collarbone. My stomach clenches, trying to find an escape from the reeling swarm of heat in my gut.

My shoulders cave into the ticklish sensation, caving inwards, as he pecks impossibly light at my skin. The sudden movement deters Matt. He pulls his face upward, his eyes sinking into mine like an anchor.

The flat line between his lips curve upwards, tugging into a mischievous smirk. I feel his hand leave my shoulder. His fingers lift up from underneath my chin, holding either side of my face. His grip is secure, but not forceful as he pulls my head to the side.

The movement opens my neck more to him. My hair slides off my shoulder and to my front, creating a barrier in front of my neck. I see his smirk falter for a minute, but it stays slightly painted on his face.

His eyes dart to mine as his hand leaves my chin. I keep my head pressed against his shoulder at the angle, watching as his eyes gleam with a new found proudness. His hand brushes the hair backward, letting it fall behind my shoulder.

The slight touch leaves me breathless. I fight back a smile as I try to keep my breath at an even pace.

His lips hovering over my skin, nearly brushing it, makes all my thoughts run blank. My hands on his knees gasp on as I feel his lips brush against my flesh in the slightest. A vibration along my neck from a laugh emitting from him sends an embarrassment to my cheeks with a burning sensation.

“--all mine, right?” His lips finally brush my neck with a soft kiss. The wet noise echoing off the barren walls of my bedroom.

His mouth trails down, leaving the hair on my skin standing straight on my neck with each clambering movement of his lips. “--mine,” his tongue darts out, teasingly licking the area right below my ear. “--mine” the touch of his lips on the spot makes my insides crawl with excitement.

“Matt!” I squirm in his arms as he eases his hold. He brings me back to his chest, resting his chin on top of my head as chuckles escape his mouth.

As I caught my breath while leaning on his shoulder, it felt like every star in existence was aligning into its rightful place. The words escaping his mouth, his lips on my neck, everything—it all just felt right.

“I can’t believe you’re mine.” he says softly. My chest clenches with a light laugh at his sweet words that have repeatedly fallen from his lips like a prayer.

His words weren’t a direct complement–but it felt like one. His soft claims made me feel like I was the best prize to be earned–and he won the contest of my heart.

“You’ve said that almost five times, Matt.” I ridicule playfully. The taunting words escape my mouth with a slight giggle as his lips press down with a slight kiss on the crown of my head. His hands reach up my arms, landing on my shoulders with a gentle squeeze.

“I know, I know–” His chin rests on my head again as his hands rub up and down my arms. “--just still can’t believe it.” he mutters. I let out a breathy laugh, letting myself curl further into him. A hum vibrates in my mouth as his hands delicately rub my skin.

“I, uh, I did have a question for you.” he says. I hum against him, smiling at his shy tone. “I know you said you were already coming to my game this week, but–uh…” his hands stutter along my skin, his words falling silent.

“Matt, what is it?” I ask. His arms move back up along my arms, squeezing gently on my shoulders.

“I know I don’t own you–I want you to know that. I’d never make you–” My eyes widen at his words. I shift my head toward the side, looking up at his quickly shifting gaze that floats across my nearly barren room.

“Matt, you’re freaking me out here.” I warn. He shakes his head, swallowing thickly. His pale blue eyes gleam down into mine with uncertainty.

“Could you–do you want to wear my jersey to the game?” He breathes out quickly. His fast moving lips give me no chance to respond as I watch him avert his eyes from mine, dancing along the empty walls.

“--I…you don’t have to. I know I don’t own you, I don’t want you to think that I think that. I don’t—really. I just, I’d really like–” his anxious rambling makes my lips quiver as I attempt to hold back a smile.

“Matt,” his eyes flicker to mine. I lift my head up, placing a swift kiss onto his lips before leaning back in his hold. “--I’d love to.” I admit. His eyes light up as he leans his face against the top of my head.

“Really?” he quips. I nod my head at his pure excitement. He hugs me tighter against him, swaying me in the hug. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” he chants.

My cheeks begin to ache from the muscle strain of smiling for so long. For some reason, the realization makes my lips tug even more. I let my lips fall into a resting position as he hugs me close.

“I brought it with me!” he cheers. He leans down, balancing me on the bed as he grabs his bag off of the floor. He pulls out a gray, blue, and red jersey. He holds it up.

“It has my number,” the number four is lettered in bold across both the front and the back as he flips the jersey around. “--and it has my name.” His last name is printed above the number on the back.

I smile, resisting the urge to reach out for the jersey as he lets the material fall into my lap. I feel his eyes burning into me as my cheeks begin to blush. I whip my head around, coming face to face as his breath hovers over my lips.

“You think my nails are dry yet?” The intense staring contest is broken by my question. He takes my hands, pulling them up to his face as he gently presses down on my nail bed.

“Hmm…almost, but not yet. What’s up? Do you need me to grab something?” he asks. I shake, prodding my tongue in the side of my cheek. He tilts his head to the side with a curious smile. “--what are you plotting in that pretty little head, hm?” he teases.

I lick over my lips, watching as he struggles to keep his eyes trained on mine from the subtle action. The warmth of his touch increases as his breath comes out shakily. His grip falls to my hips as his fingers clasp securely with a strong hold.

“Well,” I exaggerate, watching as his eyes squint further down on me. “--I was gonna try on the jersey–” his lips tug into an endearing smile. “--but, looks like you’ll just have to wait to see it on me.” I taunt.

I laugh, watching the smile disappear from his lips as he gives me a blank stare. “Noooo! Don’t be sad–you’ll see it on me soon! Friday is literally tomorrow, Matt.” I point out.

He nods his head as his cheeks fight back the smile that grows onto his face. I bite the inside of my cheek watching him struggle to keep his composure. He makes me feel like a prize, he makes me feel special—he makes me feel wanted.

The whole idea of him made me so happy. Sunny skies clear of any clouds. But, my dad played into the scene with a subtle cloud that was so small it seemed unnoticeable.

Until the cloud of him pushed to the front of my thoughts, blocking over the sun.

If I wasn’t even enough for my own father–why would I be enough for him? Was it only a matter of time before his gentle hands started to become rougher with me?

‘Too good to be true’ loomed over my mind in a chant with every movement I let my thoughts wander. I had only ever been shown I ruin things.

I wanted to hold him tightly in my clasp like an irreplaceable glass sculpture. But, another part of me was screaming to put him down on the shelf. Look, don’t touch–so I could appreciate him, even fantasize about what it would be like to have him–but in that case, I couldn’t accidentally drop him.

After all, I was horribly clumsy. My feet tripped over cement like rocks tumbling down a hill. My words fell from my mouth in jumbled sentences that didn’t always make sense.

My intentions always seemed trapped with me, under a fortress of a fallen castle. Heavy bricks, heavy stones. I would try to reach out and build the castle, only–I was always applying too much weight in the wrong area. The colossal buildings herded down on me with every attempt I could recall.

Most attempts had always revolved around my dad. I had given up trying to help a long time ago. I came to learn that all I ever did was make things worse at an age so early, I couldn’t even remember it.

I tried to throw out his bottles. I tried talking to him. I tried bonding with him.

I didn’t mean to ‘set back’ his progress. I just wanted to be a part of it. I wanted to be a part of his life–something that mattered to him.

“--whatcha thinkin’ about so hard?” Matt’s voice brings me back to the near-empty room. I glance over the walls, the scratched and worn beige paint on the walls making my chest feel heavier.

“I like your room better.” I breathe out. I feel Matt’s chest rumble with a chuckle from behind me as his thumbs trace circle through the fabric of my, well–his, shirt on my hips.

“Yeah?” he remarks. I nod my head against him. “--well, I’m not gonna lie. My bed is a lot comfier–and spacious, but I kinda like having you be this close.” he whispers into my hair. His hot breath against my scalp on the crown of my head sends a crawling sensation down my ears and shoulders.

“That’s not even it, I just,” I let out a heavy breath. “--your room is so…home-y? I don’t know how to word it.” I say.

His hands squeeze up to my waist. “Mr. Puggles really adds to my aesthetic, huh?” he teases.

I bite my tongue as a playful laugh leaves my lips. “Yeah, actually.” I remark. I feel his chest heave with a soft sigh from behind me as he pulls me closer to him.

His cheek nuzzles against the back of my head as I hear him huff. “What’s that for?” I question.

His soft voice meets my ear, “you’re not close enough.” he whines out. I struggle to hold back a laugh as I suck my lips in between my teeth.

Looking down in my lap, I notice the pile of jersey material. I grin as I relish on the new idea.

“Matt?” I ask.

His lips move against the back of my head with a soft kiss. “What, baby?” The name rolls off his tongue with such ease that it makes my stomach flutter.

I run my tongue over my lips as I try to form a sentence. My mind stutters, being completely consumed in him as I feel his hands grip me closer to him.

I lean up from his embrace, but his palm presses down with urgency. The neediness of his grasp sent heart clenching warmth throughout my entire body.

“Matt.” I laugh. He shakes his head, gurgling sounds of defiance as I try to sit up, only to have his arms enclose tighter around me.

Huffing in defeat, I hold back a grin. “Guess I won’t let you put the jersey on now.” I mutter.

I choke back a laugh as his head whips around in less than a second. “What? NO–here, let just…” he trails off, helping me sit up as he stands up beside the bed. I press down on the shiny green paint on my nails, smiling as the paint stays perfectly in place from the light touch.

“They’re dry,” I see his face falter slightly as he grabs the jersey in his grip. “--but can you still help me?” I suggest. He nods with a shy smile, bunching up the shirt to fit it over my head.

In one swift movement, he pulls the jersey over my head. The neckline of the T-shirt on my body pokes out from how baggy the jersey is. “Can you take off the shirt from underneath actually?” I say.

His wide eyes glance at me with a soft nod. He pulls the bunched up fabric from my waist and tugs it over my head. His hand shakily reaches out for the hem of the T-shirt. His eyes reach mine, raised as his forehead creases.

“Is this okay?” he asks. The care in his voice is heavily apparent as he searches my eyes for any hesitation. I give him a curt nod, lifting my arms as he takes off the article of clothing.

I sit on the bed in front of him with just a thin cotton bra covering my chest. His eyes flicker around the room as I watch his cheeks paint themselves with a red hue.

“You good there?” I tease. He shakes his head incredulously with a tight line of his lips. He slips the large jersey over my head. The fabric pools at my hips on the bed.

“Shut up.” he mutters. I bring my hand up to his cheek, squeezing the pink skin as he scrunches up his nose.

“--it’s okay. I’m all yours, remember?” I retorted. He tries to hold the smile back, failing miserably as I drop my hands to his chest.

“How could I forget?” he taunts. The smirk grows on his face as he reaches a hand up, ruffling my hair. I let out a small gasp, feeling the now frizzy hair reaching out in various directions.

“Matt!” I whine. He laughs lightly, soothing his flat palms over my hair as he combs through the mess. “--’m sorry, I’m sorry.” he says. I playfully glare up at him before an idea flounders into my head.

Matt had left from my house for hockey practice only minutes before I heard the front door open. I listened to my dad’s heavy steps thud on the wooden floor from downstairs.

The first attempts at trying to talk to him didn’t go great–or even good for that matter. The sinking anchor of disappointment bellowed in my stomach from the interaction.

I clench Matt’s jersey into my hands, clinging onto the soft material. My dad’s words still echoed in my mind.

Although my heart still felt heavy, I couldn’t even stomach the thought of giving up hope on him. I still remembered my dad–the man who helped my sick mom stir cake batter at ungodly hours of the night, just to be there for her.

He was a shell of a man before she passed. He gradually faded into a stranger. I couldn’t remember all the sweet moments we had shared–but, I did remember that they were there.

I remembered him crying into a pillow when I peeked into his room as a kid. He was as broken as I was.

I barely even remembered my mom. I longed for the ghost of a memory. He had lived years along her side. He lost someone. He lost his wife. He lost the person he cried over for endless nights.

I lost a memory. I lost a shadow of a mother. I couldn’t even remember a time where she didn’t have deathly pale skin. I didn’t even know her.

The journal on my nightstand mocked me. The closed book veiled over words of a woman that I couldn’t even recall how she spoke. It felt personal–too invasive for someone I didn’t even know better than a stranger practically.

With a heavy sigh, I stand from my bed. I may have lost her, but I didn’t want to lose him too.

My feet patter on the ground with soft steps as I make my way down the stairs. As soon as I round the corner, I come face to face with a saddening sight.

My dad sits on the couch, his elbows propped on his knees and his face buried in his hands. I clear my throat, clasping my hands behind my back. He slowly huffs, bringing his face upward as his eyes meet mine.

“How–”

He holds up a hand as my lips seal tightly. “Kid–I just, I really can’t.” he huffs out. I clench my hands in each other as I bite my tongue, nodding as I stare at the floor.

“It’s just, it’s been a really rough day and I–”

“I have rough days too, you know.” I interject. I hear him sigh. I watch as his hands reach in his pockets, pulling out a cigarette. “--I want you to get better. I really do–but I don’t even feel like I know you.” my words fall from my mouth like acid rain.

“Kid, I-” he pinches the bridge of his nose. “--I’ll come up to your room to talk in a minute, okay?” he says.

My feet shift on the ground with surprise as I let my hands bundle up the sleeves of the shirt by my sides. “Oh…okay.” I mutter.

My feet pivot on the wooden flooring as I drag my weight up the stairs. The door creaks as I gently push it semi-closed.

Please, don’t make me wait forever.

I sat on the edge of my bed, combing my fingers through my scalp. My head begins to ache from the overwhelming thoughts.

He’s coming up to talk to me–he’s trying. I just wish he didn’t make it sound like such a chore.

A few minutes pass before I hear the footsteps pattering up the stairs. My door that is slightly ajar pushes open with a knock. He stands hesitantly at the doorway, a cigarette in his hand.

The smoke clouds in my room as I cough from the overbearing smell. “M’sorry–do you want to talk outside? I just, I really need this right now, kid.” he says.

I shake my head as I push myself up from my bed. Standing, I make my way over to my window, sliding the janky pane of glass upwards as it resists moving. “--it’s fine. I’ll just,” I hiss, feeling the sting on my scalp. I look up, seeing a couple strands of hair caught in the window.

I tug on the hairs, wincing at the sting from the pricks on my scalp. Letting out a breath of relief, I smooth my hair down before collecting it all on one side of my chest.

I turn around to be met with my dad’s wide eyes. His steps stride towards me with an urge. His hand knots in the fabric on my shoulder, tugging the jersey. “What the fuck is this?” he asks.

I pull the material from his hands, confusion flooding my system as I read the pure rage on his face. “I–what? Dad, it’s Matt’s jersey. I was going to his–”

“Sturniolo? He’s a fucking Sturniolo?” he spits. I nod my head hesitantly, swallowing thickly at his angry words. “No, why the fuck are you wearing this? Take this shit off right now!” he urges.

He yanks at the material before throwing his hand through his hair and puffing out another breath of smoke. I cough, turning towards the window to find relief from the fresh air.

“He’s,” the words get stuck as I cough out. “--he’s my boyfriend, dad. I know you had a falling out with his dad–”

“You know that and you didn’t think to fucking tell me?!” he yells. My hands grasp onto the window sill as my vision gets blurred from tears clouding in my eyes.

“It’s not like we fucking talk, dad.” I say bitterly. I hear his heavy breathing from behind me stop.

“What is that–why do you have this?” I turn around, seeing the leather journal clasped in his hands. Fuck. I panic, turning back towards the window, squinting my eyes shut. Please, just let this be a bad dream. Please.

The sudden clang of the window glass makes my eyes dart open. My dad’s hand slammed onto the window, the loud shutter of movement makes the glass pane fall from its open position.

I don’t have time to react before I feel the throbbing pain in my hands. A broken gasp escapes my lips as I hurriedly tug my hands out from under the window and to my chest.

“Do you just not want me to get fucking better? I’m trying—I’m trying for you. I–” his voice breaks as I hear his steps travel from behind me. I hear the creek of my bed, grasping onto my throbbing hands, desperately holding back cries of pain.

“I’m sorry, kid. Are your hands okay? I didn’t mean to–it’s just, god, you don’t understand…” he mutters. I slowly turn around, seeing him sitting on the edge of my bed, staring down at the journal in his grasp.

As his head turns up to me, I see the wet tear stains on his cheek. He’s crying.

“I’m trying so hard, I promise. I need you to help me, Y/n.” I feel my heart ache as his voice cracks. “--I can’t have you with him, I can’t have you reading this.” he says, waving the book in his hand before setting it back down on his lap with a loud sigh.

My head throbbing and my hands aching in pain don’t compare to the shattering collapse of my heart ripping from my chest. The nausea crawls up in waves as I can practically feel my heart in my throat.

He’s trying. He’s trying for me. He’s finally getting better. I can’t give up on him.

Why now? Why when I find things that make life seem a bit better?

My conflicting thoughts create a bellowing pit in my gut. I can’t give up on him, he’s all I’ve ever had.

He looks up at me, placing the journal to the side before standing up. His arms spread open before tugging me into his arms. I freeze at the sudden notion.

He’s hugging me.

All I had prayed for–endless nights upon endless years, was in front of me. He was trying for me. He was hugging me.

I let my arms tie around his waist despite the stinging burn in my hands. “Please–don’t give up on me, kid.” he cries out.

“I won’t.” I whisper out.

I can’t.

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