#and also love the hook horrors quite a lot

[hyydraworks]

Making birthday mugs for friends and getting to test out some Baldur’s Gate 3 art?! Because that game is taking up nearly all of my brain space at present 😅

Scratch is bestest boi.

[lilystyles]

wildest dreams.

part two of style, written by @lilystyles

my masterlist & style masterlist

authors note the very requested part two of style. i got lots of asks & reblogs & comments asking for more of style!H so i decided to write one for y'all. thanks for all the love on it. also there was one ask i got with the idea of y/n going on a blind date and i LOVED it so thank u anon 🩷

brief description y/n and harry start to see each other more and more. but it's a secret, things get complicated when emma sets y/n up on a blind date. harry doesn’t like it one bit.

warnings! slight age gap, SMUT (f!receiving, fingering, daddy kink, missionary, riding, very slight breeding kink, no condom, all the good stuff) sexual tension, mentions of drugs&alcohol abuse. wordcount: (around 15k words)

fratboy!older!bffsbrother!harry x younger!innocent!reader

* * * * *

Harry arrived at Y/n’s massive and buzzing share house almost twenty minutes before eight.

He’d parked his car nearby and quietly realised to himself on the walk up the driveway that he’d never actually been inside the sharehouse before. He had dropped her off a fair few times and picked her up a handful from here but Y/n preferred to come stay at his place. He couldn’t blame her, Niall’s place was similar he lived in one of the frats nearby campus. His room and the house were disgusting and Harry much preferred his clean quiet house with his sister. Even though Harry was in a frat too, he lived out of the house. The only reason those guys had welcomed him into the frat in the first place was because he was on the Uni soccer team and he was really good. His room was turned into a storage room for alcohol, dartboards, and bongs. Harry had hooked up with a few girls in there regardless of the lack of bed.

He felt a funny feeling in his tummy walking up the driveway, since when did he get nervous? He’d been with so many people he didn’t think that existed for him anymore. But this was different, this wasn’t just anyone this was Y/n. His Y/n. The girl from home.

He looked up at the house biting his lip, Y/n’s place certainly wasn’t as trashy as Alpha Chi Sigma, thankfully. Hers was a little ways off campus it was this old run-down brick house with two stories and eight rooms. It was jam-packed with students and actually threw quite a few parties, known on campus for its great big backyard and one of Y/n’s roommate Mike's weed brownies. Y/n didn’t care all that much when parties happened, she’d either invite Emma and they’d have lots of tequila and end up asleep in Y/n’s room, or she might even invite Harry and his mates too just for fun. Otherwise she just locked her room and escaped to the library or the Styles’ place. 

As Harry reached the big red door he knocked loudly and a short girl opened the door before his knuckles had even retracted back to his side. He recognised her from his Economics class, he thought. She was in some pyjamas and looked up very confused.

“You're not the Chinese guy.” She said eyeing him annoyedly, groans escaped the mouths of others inside, and he could understand their disappointment. “Who are you?”

This made Harry feel suddenly rather guilty for not being the Chinese delivery guy and he frowned, “I’m Harry, ‘m a friend of Y/n’s?”

“Upstairs third door to your left.” She said shortly opening the door wide enough to let him in before promptly sitting back down on the couch with a bunch of other students, they were watching what looked like a Japanese horror film. 

Harry shut the door behind him and made his way upstairs quickly, Y/n’s roommates didn’t seem all that friendly, he hoped was going in the right direction. As he reached the top of the stairs he heard music coming from one room that sounded like a rave and knew that definitely wasn’t Y/n’s room, he heard people chatting away in another, and when he was at the third door he saw a small sign on the door that said ‘Y/n’s Room <3’. He smiled at the familiar neat handwriting that was on so many birthday cards in his collection, and knocked on the door, with a few quick taps.

He heard some shuffling behind the door and it wasn’t long before the door swung open. There she was, his Y/n. Even though he’d only seen her a few hours ago it felt like a long time ago now. How did he already miss her?

“You're here early, Styles.” She said surprised checking the time on her phone in her hand. Harry didn’t seem the type to show up early, and normally he didn’t Y/n knew that about him from years of experience. He was even late to his own birthday parties and if you asked a single person who had hooked up with him they’d say he was always late when they invited him over. Just his way. He wasn’t a timely person.

Harry smiled down at her form, she looked much more rested than this morning. She had taken a nap for a good portion of the morning and a long shower cleaning every inch of herself, she felt very rejuvenated now. The warm water had soothed her aching muscles and small bruises that littered her body from last night. She’d washed off all the sweat and alcohol that had sweated out of her this morning, and her hangover had eased, thank god. She had taken some aspirin for her head too and drank lots and lots of water. 

She looked so soft and cosy, the golden light of her room hit her face, showing all the angles of her calm expression. She was wearing this matching tracksuit set that was a blue almost grey colour, and some fuzzy pink socks Emma bought her for Christmas last year. Her hair was freshly washed, dried, and styled in her usual way. Her beautiful face was bare of makeup only some moisturiser that smelt really good, and her lips were covered in a glossy lip balm.

“Wanted to make a good impression, Babe.” He said smirking. 

Y/n let him join her inside shaking her head, it was very unlike him to be on time and she’d expected he would arrive around 8:30 instead of 8. He placed his bag of snacks and DVDs down onto her little bed taking in the space. 

Her room was so her, she had this big mattress on the floor that took up most of her room. Her sheets were mismatched shades of pink, blue, and lavender and she had about a dozen pillows. She had lots of fairy lights strung up, posters, and photos covering her walls. Her mattress and little desk by her window near the back of the room took up most of the small space. But if she had picked a bigger room that meant having a roommate so she didn’t mind all that much.

It was quite neat in here. She had all her desk organised with her laptop and textbooks. Her cupboard had somehow miraculously shut despite the large array of clothes stuffing it. She had a candle burning that smelt like cinnamon cookies, but underneath the candle was the underlying smell of her. Whether that was her laundry detergent or something that was just her, Harry didn’t know, but the smell brought him great comfort.

He shrugged off his big thick coat too, the day had turned into a windy-rainy one and he wanted to stay warm, but Y/n’s room was very warm inside. He was in an ashen grey hoodie with red flannel over the top, some black jeans and sneakers. His hair was unruly as always but he looked extra good today. He made himself comfortable on the bed grabbing a pink bear and cuddling it to his chest playfully. He dwarfed her bed with his tall form, and he looked so funny sitting in her bed. Harry Styles, sex god, player, and party animal, with a rotten attitude, was curled up in her bed. She almost wanted to take a picture to show people, but she knew she wouldn’t be telling a soul about him being with her tonight.

“I’ve known you for years I already have all the impressions needed, Harry.”

He looked over at her from her bed. “Yeah, but you’ve never seen me on a date before, have yeh? I can be wholesome.”

What? This is a date? 

Y/n blushed deeply, if she’d known that this was a date she would have dressed a bit nicer. She was just in some joggers and a hoodie, but to be fair to her they were her nice ones. The ones lacking ice cream stains and holes. Harry had seen her looking like a hungover mess, he’d seen her in the middle of the night at the library, he’d seen her with the flu, and she never looked bad even at her worst.

“This is a date?” She asked looking down at her sock-covered feet.

She’d been dreaming of this day since she was a kid when Harry had helped her when she fell off her bike and scraped her knee. She still remembered the day vividly, it was something she thought of every time they all went home to Holmes Chapel for the holidays or summertime, and they drove passed the playground. She still had the scar their on her right knee, even now. And she remembers Harry putting the bandaid on for her and kissing her knee to ‘take the pain away’. Every time she felt the little bump or saw the lighter patch of skin on her knee she thought of him kissing it. She’d stopped crying after he’d done that and from that day on, her heart belonged to him. 

She thought if they ever did somehow end up together on a date, that’d he would take her for a drive or they’d go to the cinema. Something normal. Maybe even a romantic stroll somewhere or something wild like skinny dipping. But instead here he was in her room making himself at home in her little bed where she’d spent hours thinking of him; before her eyes finally allowed her to sleep.

He laughed at her shy expression, patting a spot on the bed beside him for her to sit. “Wasn’t I obvious about that?”

She sat down beside him, laughing at herself she didn’t know much when it came to dating, she’d only had two or so boyfriends. She’d tried the one-night stand thing once but it wasn’t for her. She didn’t know dating etiquette. So she was all stiff beside him now feeling even more nervous than before he’d arrived. This whole thing with Harry frankly didn’t feel real, she’d liked him for so many years and only now was he starting to show similar feelings toward her, it honestly tripped her out a lot. It would be like your celebrity crush showing up at your door with flowers, a bit of a dream, right?

“Not to me.” She said looking at him. He smelt deliciously good beside her, and she wanted to devour him.

He looked over at her with the same eyes he’d given her in the kitchen when she’d comforted him, all soft and molten like an ice cream on a hot day. As he lifted his hand to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, she leaned into his touch, his hand was so warm and smooth against her face. He was so gentle with her and she felt her mind flashback to last night for what felt like the millionth time when his hands were all over her body. Though they’d been a bit wild, he was always gentle with her unless she asked him otherwise.

“Well I’m sorry, but this is a date, is that alright with you?” He asked, nibbling his bottom lip to contain a smile. She was just so cute, sitting there in front of him like a doe-eyed little thing. You’d have thought that she barely knew him with how she was acting.

She nodded. “Fine by me.” 

“Good to hear, Baby.” He sighed at her because she still seemed very nervous. He didn’t know how to comfort her other than touch. “Why are you so far away? You know I don’t bite, not unless you ask me to.”

She looked over at him, “I’m just nervous, I guess. If my fourteen-year-old self could see me now…”

She didn’t finish her sentence.

This made his heart swell. “You're nervous around me? Even after everything we did last night?”

She shrugged like that was an obvious conclusion. “Well, yeah…of course.”

This made him throw his head back laughing, like a little kid. “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little nervous too. S’okay to be nervous. But don’t worry it’s just me. Nothing special.”

That made her feel better, she looked up at him, a smile cracking on her face. “You're nervous too?”

He nodded. “Of course I am. I’m on a date with a gorgeous girl, I’d be a fool not to be.”

Y/n pecked his cheek in response, her lips smearing against the tiny stubble on his cheek, as she quickly moved away and opened the bag excitedly to see the things he’d brought. He brought snacks as requested all their favourites (peanut M&Ms, popcorn, and a tub of Ben & Jerry’s) along with a few DVDs. The one he had been raving about was in there and she grabbed it putting it on the very small telly she had by the end of her bed.

Harry explained a story about how he went to three different grocery shops to find the peanut M&Ms because apparently, the world was in a shortage today. This made Y/n want to kiss him because he’d gone to all that effort knowing Y/n’s favourite movie snack was M&Ms. Whenever they went to the cinema she always got them, and the three of them would go a fair amount. They loved going late at night and talking loudly in empty cinemas about how cheesy the films were. 

She looked at him from the edge of the bed. He’d kicked his sneakers off into the corner and he was resting on her bed, head lying on her pillow, a knitted blanket over his lap. He looked very comfy and at ease, and honestly, he was. The smell of her bed was comforting and the soft tone of her voice was soothing. Y/n had a way of driving him crazy, usually when her attention wasn’t on him, but a way of calming him instantly when their eyes met.

“You hungry? I want pizza.” She asked brows pinched in thought.

He nodded grabbing his phone to call them. “Sure. Joeys?”

“I think I want a ha—”

“Hawaiin with no pineapple, I know, you freak. Who doesn’t like pineapple?”

“Me.” She said. She’d never really noticed how observant Harry was until now. He knew her pizza order, he knew she liked peanut M&Ms, he knew her chamomile tea brand, and he knew she liked popcorn extra buttery. Which happens when you have history like they do, but she never thought he cared that much. So what if she knew he liked pepperoni with extra spice? She was obsessed with him for most of her adolescence, that made sense. But why did Harry know that? She was the obsessed one.

“Hey mate, yeah can I get a large Hawaiin no pineapple please, and large pepperoni extra spicy, and a loaf of garlic bread too thanks.” He said into the phone. 

Y/n told Harry her address in a hushed tone and he parroted it to the pizza guy on the phone. The pizza would arrive in 20 minutes from now, so Y/n joined his side happily and hit play on the telly. He wrapped an arm around her shoulder so she could rest against his side, and it all felt very domestic. Her cheek was resting against him and she felt her eyes drooping even though she’d already napped today.

Y/n normally cuddled with Emma and watched movies on her shoulder while Harry brooded on the leather recliner and complained when the girls picked a rom-com of some kind. But she saw him cry during The Notebook last month. He always said Spiderman was his favourite movie but she knew it was actually The Notebook.

She felt guilty at the thought of her best friend, and a pang in her tummy. Normally if a guy had even made eye contact with her Y/n was blowing up her phone with every detail, that’s what best friends are for. But she couldn’t tell her about Harry. They’d stop being friends. Emma and Y/n had many friends who had come and gone because of Harry, she didn’t blame any of them for shagging him. He’s always been attractive and shaggable, but she knew better than to get with him then and she didn’t know what had done it but lately, he’d just been irresistible last night and right now. 

Maybe back then she just had more self-control. Y/n remembers a girl named Cami the most. She and Harry hooked up once drunkenly at a party Gemma had thrown while Anne and Robin were away and the next morning Emma and Y/n walked in on her giving him a blowie. Cami was then banned from any other sleepover. Which was a shame because Cami was super nice, it made Y/n wonder if those years of friendship protected her from Emma’s harsh banishment or if that didn’t count. 

“What are you thinkin’ about?” He asked her playing with the strands of loose hair resting against his arm.

She looked up at him away from the telly she’d zoned out on. “I- Em.” She said.

Harry nodded. “Yeah, I knew it would be something you’d be thinking about.”

She sighed. “Yeah, I just- she’s gonna hate me, H. I want you, but you know I can’t.”

Harry knew Emma was Y/n’s number one person and they were basically like sisters, Y/n was a part of his family, though he’d never seen her in a particularly brotherly way. She came on holidays overseas with them, she was invited to family dinners, and they’d even had a Christmas Eve together a few times in the past couple of years. And that wasn’t something he would ever try and get in the way of, Y/n being there was what made him want to attend. Because he loved that Y/n was a part of his life in that way and he’d grown up with her, he loved having her around. He cherished those moments and even though he didn’t act like it, he would miss her when she wasn’t there. Last Christmas Eve she was with her Grandparents and he’d hated playing Scrabble without her.

She had no idea of any of his true feelings. Which was his own fault, he knew that, he was purposefully rude to Y/n to keep her at arm's length, and acting like she didn’t exist to try and suffocate his feelings from her. Emma was behind that, ever since he could remember he wasn’t allowed to share Y/n. Emma was always reminding him when his eyes lingered on her longer than they should, that Y/n was Emma’s best friend, off limits. And despite how he felt about her he’d listened to keep Y/n out of the drama of Emma’s wrath. 

But Harry cared for Y/n very deeply and he wished Emma wasn’t so weird about it. Why couldn’t they both just share her? And anyway, it was Y/n’s decision, not Emma’s. She wasn't a toy she was a person, who made her own decisions whether or not Emma approved. Normally Emma’s judgement was the only thing Y/n needed to make a decision, but when it came to Harry she had to disagree.

And anyway, she seemed pretty happy to be wrapped up in his arms right now, despite knowing what trouble it would cause if anyone found out. She knew it was wrong to lie, and hide, but she didn't think it was wrong be around Harry. That's what felt right.

“I know she doesn’t like people getting involved with me.” He began, “But that’s only because they always get hurt by me and it becomes a whole thing. But I would never hurt you.”

His reassuring words made her feel better but she looked up at him, with one more worry. “How is this any different than you and Cami, Lacey, or Tiffany—” She was about to continue her long list of girls but he cut her off.

“Because you're the only one for me.”

Y/n was about to ask him what he meant by that but the doorbell rang. “That’s probably pizza.” 

She sat up and left before he could say anything else. 

She was happy to be with him and she enjoyed his company and his cuddles but this whole thing scared her a lot. There were a lot of risks in going down this path with him and she was painfully aware of all the risks, she knew every single one and the reason she hadn’t gotten with him before now was because she knew it was dangerous for her to get involved with such a gorgeous devilish creature. 

Don’t get her wrong she trusted Harry with her life. But that doesn’t mean she trusted him when it came to his relationships. He’d never had a girlfriend, all the girls thought they were his girlfriends but he never saw any of them as more than a shag. Which is fine, but she knew she couldn’t be satisfied with just a shag. Her heart was too soft for that boy to only want his dick.

When Y/n came back with the warm pizzas burning her hands Harry was sleepily cuddling her bear in bed and she felt her heart melt and let her thoughts melt away too. They ate the pizza in bed and all worries were washed away as they distracted themselves with Y/n’s favourite film. When Harry Met Sally. 

Harry remembered the countless times this movie was on at midnight when he came downstairs to see Y/n asleep on his couch using it to tune out Emma’s snores.

Her eyes stung with sleep as she watched tonight, it comforted her, and the smell of Harry and the gentle sound of his heartbeat lulled her to sleep. She fell asleep quickly into the movie and Harry only noticed when he was getting no replies from her during his complaints about how cheesy and unrealistic this movie was. When he realised she was asleep right there on his chest he stopped talking and moving; wanting to let her sleep there. He grabbed the knitted blanket from the bottom of their legs and brought it to just below her chin. 

Kissing her forehead before focusing back on the movie. He thought Meg Ryan was pretty fit and the gentle breathing of Y/n was calming, it wasn’t long until he fell asleep too holding her very close to him. Not a worry about being caught, or oversleeping, just enjoyed the warmth of her body and the soft breaths that hit his neck.

It was a couple weeks later until Harry saw Y/n again and he hated to admit it to himself that he missed her, more than he’d ever missed anyone and it had just been a few days. She wasn't even his girlfriend, and she was already driving him up the wall.

She’d called him that afternoon and it brought out something in Harry he’d never expected to find within himself.

Harry was not a jealous person. He wasn’t possessive at all. Never had been and he never thought he would be. It just wasn’t who he was. He always thought it was because he just never had those feelings within him, he just didn’t care. He thought jealousy was stupid. What good came from it? Jealousy never accomplished anything.

He didn’t care if the people he’d been with had moved on or gotten with someone else, one time a girl he’d had a bit of a fling with for the Summer ended up hooking up with his best friend and he truly didn’t care. Like at all. They expected him to get angry, shout, or stop talking to them at least. But he didn’t he just shrugged and said something about how he understood. He found someone else to spend the night with quickly after their conversation, and when someone brought it up he completely forgot it had even happened, which shows how little he cared.

He just never got jealous, and it was something he felt was beneath him. Since he saw sex as such a casual and easygoing thing to him, he felt like he belonged to everyone and no one all at once and so he saw people as all the same. It was all just a blur of people and feelings. He was lucky, he never got sad after sex or disgusted he just felt a release, left, and that was that. He didn’t like to chat all that much, he was a fuck and leave kind of guy. If the person really needed a cuddle or some aftercare he wouldn’t just leave right away but he knew cuddling usually meant feelings growing, so he tried to avoid that at all costs too. Which to some was just awful to be around, and he could understand that too. Sometimes people wanted a connection that wasn’t just compatible kinks or sexual chemistry. Something deeper, love, burning lust, tenderness. That’s not to say Harry wasn’t a good lover, he was great no matter the person he could click well with them. He made them feel like they were the only two people in the world, but there was still a bit of a shadow to his love-making that made the people know that’s all it was.

Just a fuck, just a kiss, just an orgasm. Nothing more, nothing less.

He’d heard or read about people having sex that felt like fireworks or magic or something ridiculous and sappy and he’d thought it was all blown out of proportion. Sex was more primal and animalistic to Harry. It wasn’t something otherworldly. It was like eating, sleeping, or breathing. It was just a natural human experience and urge, and people needed it to survive a healthy life. It wasn’t tied to any emotions, just like eating a sandwich at lunch. Wasn’t anything to be ashamed of either.

And it certainly wasn’t ethereal, or at least it wasn’t until Y/n.

He hadn’t felt so connected with someone like that ever. In conversation, in sex, in life. She understood him, she accepted him, and despite their differences, it worked. And god, when they had sex it was just so time-stopping. Touching her was like touching heaven.

His jealousy, his attraction, made him realise he liked her. Like actually liked her, and that if this was what liking someone was that meant he never had before. He’d never liked anyone except her. 

He’d never wanted to date someone, take care of them, and be with them without having to do anything. Just be together, you know?

Harry wanted to date Y/n, take care of her, and just be with her. The unfamiliar feelings rolled through his skin like a tidal wave. All these feelings were new to him, and it meant he didn’t know how to act. It was overwhelming and he didn’t know who to confide in.

Because now all of a sudden he was a jealous person? It just didn’t make sense. None of it did. 

When he found out Emma had set Y/n up on a double date with her and Zayn, Harry was not one bit okay with it. He couldn’t have cared less if someone he’d been with fucked his best friend in front of him, but the idea of someone thinking they could talk to Y/n made his skin crawl. Someone getting to touch her like she’d let him, someone getting to kiss her sweet lips, whisper filth in her ear? He hated it. He hated the thought. 

Jealousy burned his skin like wildfire and he didn’t know what to do. He knew Y/n wasn’t his girlfriend, but they’d been on a date now which meant more to him than any other interaction with any girl he’d ever had. It had been a perfect first date that eventually led to her falling asleep in his arms and him playing with her hair as he memorised every freckle on her face. They both woke up the next morning with a giggle and she walked him to his car her hand in his, and to his surprise kissed him against the hood of his car. It was enough to have him dazed and wanting more, her lips smeared against his excitedly with an innocent giggle. When she pulled away she whispered a breathless goodbye and he hadn’t seen her since.

They’d called a few times and chatted until the early hours of the morning about anything and everything, and he’d seen her at his house a few times. But he wasn’t allowed to act how he wished because Emma was always there, he’d always call Y/n when she was home complaining about how he wished things were different. But since neither of them knew what was going on yet they knew it was best to not tell her.

Y/n didn’t want to go on this double date. She couldn’t think of anything worse. Zayn’s friend Peter was a notorious prick on campus. He was just straight-up horrible and so jarring on the senses. They’d met here and there and Niall hated him too which was enough for Y/n to know everything she needed about the bloke.

Y/n was pretty sure no one liked him, not even Zayn. But Y/n agreed for Emma’s sake. She knew Emma really liked Zayn (or so she said) and this was one of ‘the only ways their date would happen’. But that didn’t make her not want to go any less. She called Harry as soon as Emma left her place to get ready. 

He answered on the third ring.

“Hi, Baby.”

She could practically hear his smile. Things were going well for them. She thought the shift from whatever they once were to this would be awkward but it was easy. They were still teasing, and rude, but the words hardly had any edge anymore. Even when she swore at him it felt like a kiss and now when he stared at her Y/n noticed the softness in his eyes. Had that always been there?

“Hey, Styles.”

He sighed softly sitting down on his couch, “And to what do I owe this pleasure, Y/n?”

“Some bad news.”

He sucked a breath, “What’s wrong?” His voice melted into her spine, and he sounded worried. He was thinking the worst, and though this was pretty shitty it was nothing like he was thinking. He hoped she was okay.

“You know I like you, right?”

He nodded but forgot she couldn’t see. “Yes, I like you too, what is it?”

“I’m sorry, H, but I didn’t know how to say no without blowing our cover…” She said avoiding saying it. She didn’t know how he would react. He’d been so lovely, she didn’t want to hurt his feelings.

“Spit it out, Trouble.” He said.

“Emma begged me to go on a double date so she could be with Zayn.” She said pinching her eyes shut and practically wincing on the other line.

“And what did you say?”

“I said yes, I’m sorry,”

Harry felt a pang of jealousy rush into his chest unfamiliarly. But he didn’t want to make her feel bad. He knew she hadn’t meant to hurt him. She sounded so guilty over the line, he was just glad she couldn’t see him. He was embarrassingly jealous. He felt winded as his hand moved up to his chest, squeezing where the pain was. Normally he always knew the right things to say, but he struggled to find the words. He was just pissed.

Emma, totally got in the way time and time again. It’s like she was out to sabotage them. He wanted to tell her off, but he knew better. Y/n would be mad if he did that.

“It’s fine, we only went on one date.” He said, but it didn’t come out like he wanted. He wanted to sound aloof and fine. But his voice came out forced.

Y/n sighed, he was right they had only been on one date. But she felt that it had meant more to her than any other dates she’d been on. And she was sure it would mean way more than this stupid date. “I know. But I wanted to tell you that I don’t like Peter. I hate that guy actually, he’s a fuckin’ prick….” 

Harry despised Peter. Even more now. He got to be with Y/n all pretty in public on a date, Harry knew no one would treat her as well as he could. Harry knew what she wanted. What did Peter know?

“...But Emma asked me. And if I’d have said I was seeing someone else, involved in something serious, she would have drilled me like a Russian spy. You know that it’s very surprising for me to be seeing someone, she wouldn’t have let it go.”

Something serious. His heart swelled despite it all.

Harry let out a small laugh, “It’s okay, Y/n, really.”

“I don’t want to go, but it’s only for a few hours. Can I call you after?”

This made him smile, despite how pissed he was she was so cute. “Yeah, ‘course.”

“Okay, good, well I have to get ready, Styles, talk soon.” She said.

“Bye, Trouble” He hung up and his hands itched to do something. But he knew he couldn’t do anything he’d just have to wait for her call. The whole thing made him antsy. 

Just as he hung up Emma walked through the front door. She was holding some shopping bags.

“What are you up to?” He asked. They looked like clothes and shoes.

She looked over with a smile. “Me and Y/n have a double date.”

He acted surprised standing up, “Oh yeah? With who?”

“Zayn and Peter.” She said walking to her room and Harry followed, wanting to know more details he’d been too afraid to ask Y/n.

“When?”

“Tonight, at seven,” Emma replied quickly hands looking through her racks of dresses, eyes far from Harry who had sat himself on her bed.

“Where?” He prodded.

She looked over, “What is this? 21 questions? Why do you care?”

“I’m not allowed to be interested in your life? Gosh, forgive me caring, Em.”

She rolled her eyes. “I thought we’d grown out of the protective thing?”

“I just worry about you two. Boys are pigs.”

Emma sighed. “You would know.”

Harry rolled his eyes.

“We’ll be fine. It’s just at Andy’s Burgers. It’s super close to Y/n’s place. And your friends with those guys, you know they aren’t serial killers.”

His lips curled in disgust as his jaw clenched and defended himself. “Zayn is fine. Peter is not my friend at all. I hate him. He’s such a stupid twat. I don’t understand why would Y/n go out with him.”

Emma turned around her hands landing on her hips. “Because he’s hot and he’s supposed to have a big dick.”

This made Harry’s jaw clench hard. Peter better not try anything with Y/n, or he’d rip that dick off. “Why would Y/n care about something like that? Doesn’t she like guys with actual brain cells? Doesn't sound like her.”

Emma squinted, her brows pinching. “Like who, mate? It really is none of your business, Harry, we don’t question your awful taste. Anyway, I don’t see why you care? Y/n can get with whoever she wants.”

This made Harry’s stomach curl. No, she couldn’t. She could only be with him. He wanted her all to himself. No one was worthy of her, not even himself, but at least Y/n wanted him. She didn’t want Peter. She’d just told him he was a prick, she couldn’t want him.

Harry didn’t want anyone else, and he’d turned down a plethora of women and men since that night with Y/n in his bed. He’d avoided telling her that, to avoid upsetting her. He sat up, annoyed and beginning to feel his mind go on a loop of bad thoughts of Y/n with other people. Y/n kissing another boy. God, it made him feral with rage.

He shook himself out of the images pooling in his mind. “Whatever, I’m going to Niall’s. If you need me call me. Don’t let them drive you home if they’re drunk or summat.”

She nodded. “Thanks, H.”

He nodded getting up and leaving. “Bye, Em.”

“Catch ya.” She said. 

Harry grabbed his phone, wallet, and keys and left. He was gonna blow off some steam with Niall. Anything to get his mind off Y/n sitting pretty beside that dickhead ginger Peter. Thoughts of Y/n drifted to the back of his mind as he played Mario Kart with Niall and talked shit about Niall’s new boyfriend Paddy, Niall met his mates last night and they’d been proper twats to him and Paddy tried to gaslight him later on when they got back to his flat. Niall ended up leaving in a fit of rage. Harry tried his best at giving advice, he wanted to confide in Niall about this whole Y/n thing but he knew it could blow up in his face. Not that he didn't trust Niall to keep it hushed.

Y/n’s thoughts however were on only Harry, she would do anything to be on a date with him right now. They could be sharing a milkshake and talking about music or their days, honestly with Harry she would be happy to watch paint dry, his company made anything infinitely better. He was fun, he was cheeky, and she could be herself.

But no, she wasn’t with Harry, she wasn’t having fun at all. And she could hardly be her normal self one bit. She had to be quiet and polite when all she wanted to do was roll her eyes and spit out what a dickhead this boy sitting in front of her was.

She was sat beside the stupid prick Peter sipping down this actually quite delicious peanut butter & chocolate shake that was new on the menu and munching on some fries to keep her lips and hands busy while he talked her ear off. She loved the food here. She and Emma came here all the time to study and eat their body weight in their fries which have this great chicken and spicy salt flavouring on.

She just wanted the date to be over. He was so dull. The only thing he’d talked about the entire date for the past hour was him. His father’s business, how he could’ve had a career in Hockey if he didn’t injure his knee in his final year of school, and then making jokes about his ‘big’ dick and laughing like the complete and utter Tory he was. Which Y/n knew was a load of crap because one time he’d sent it to Emma during their first year of Uni and it wasn’t horrible but it certainly wasn’t some magical penis like he was saying.

Even just by looking at his face, you could tell he had no idea where the clitoris was. (Harry knew where it was blindfolded and you could just by the cocky look on his gorgeous face).

Y/n honestly thought it would’ve been less painful to slam her head between a door repeatedly. Zayn and Emma were hitting it off from the other side of the booth. They were leaning in closer, giggling, flirting. She was happy for Emma, really she was, but she didn’t see why she or Peter had to come. They added nothing to this date.

She was thankful when dinner arrived, it meant the date was almost over. She dove into her burger eating quickly so she could make an excuse to not talk or look at Peter. She hoped if she finished quickly the date could end quickly too.

“Are you girls going to that party on Saturday?” Asked Zayn taking a sip of his strawberry shake.

Emma looked at Y/n swallowing her mouthful of cheesy fries. “That’s the one at Harry’s Frat. Niall’s idea.”

Y/n nodded, she’d only go if Harry did or Emma really wanted her there. “Oh, dunno. Maybe.”

Emma smiled. “It sounds fun. I love costume parties.”

Y/n sipped on her shake and looked down at her lap her phone had a message from Harry on it. She’d check when no one was looking. She thought it was cute that he was checking on her.

“Hate those guys though. So cocky.”

Y/n looked up and without thinking scoffed, staring him down. “Who Harry and Niall?”

Peter looked over. “Yeah. Think their god’s gift because their football team’s the most supported at the Uni. Bunch of twats.”

“Can’t be any worse than you.” She said, and Emma was surprised eyes widening from across the table, Y/n’s words held a bite. But she knew that despite Y/n’s soft timid nature, she did not put up with people saying rude things about people she cared about. She was generally a calm, soft, and kept to herself kind of person. But if someone said something she didn’t agree with she always spoke up. “At least their only point of conversation isn’t about their less-than-thrilling cocks and daddy’s money.” She rolled her eyes.

“Calm down, Babe. It’s a joke. We are all mates here.” Said Peter.

Her brows furrowed as she looked at Emma, why wasn’t she saying anything? If someone had said something about either Y/n or Emma to Harry he probably would have punched them without even thinking. And Niall too, Y/n remembers one time some guy smacked Y/n’s ass at a party and Niall had to be pulled off him by three people.

“Are you dumb? Niall is our best friend and Harry is Em’s brother, you really think we aren’t going to be annoyed if you talk shit about them? Who do you think you are, huh?” She said turning to look at him.

Emma diverted the topic to something else and eventually, when Peter and Zayn were talking about Hockey, she made a signal for Y/n to follow her to the loo. Y/n was still pissed, and very ready to go home, she felt herself stewing in the corner her rage burning up under her skin. She didn’t understand why Emma hadn’t said anything, and that frustrated her more. She really hoped Emma was devising a plan for their escape but when they stepped inside the bathroom Emma stared at herself in the mirror reapplying her lip gloss she said something Y/n very much did not want to hear.

“I know Peter was a dick, but did you really have to have a go at him?”

This made Y/n even more annoyed than before, she’d only come on this fucking date for her and now she was complaining about how she acted when Peter was the one acting like a prick. Y/n didn’t see why she was at fault.

She and Emma never argued, Y/n didn’t like this. Emma was always on her side, even if Y/n had been in the wrong Emma would always be on her side. And anyway, she was protecting Harry and Niall. Not just anyone. She didn’t go out of her way to make the conversation turn into her having a go at him.

“Yes. I did. I only came on this date for you so that you could be with Zayn. Which you could’ve done without me and Peter. He’s awful, and you two could’ve just gone and done something on your own I don’t see why I had to be here.” She said, arms folding and Emma watched her. 

“And you know I don’t like when people are rude about our friends.”

Emma nodded. “I know Babe, sorry. I just didn’t want you to feel left out. You never go out with guys, I didn’t want to make you feel bad if me and Zayn start dating, you know?”

Y/n’s brows pinched, she was acting like that wasn’t Emma’s fault. Every boy she’d ever liked other than Harry, Emma had stolen or taken away. It’s like she wanted Y/n to be all hers. Not that it bothered Y/n much, if she couldn’t have Harry should didn’t want anyone anyway. 

“I don’t care about boys.”

Emma sighed grabbing her hand. “I know, but it wouldn’t hurt to put yourself out there, Babe.”

“Okay, sure, I see your point. But Peter? Really?”

She laughed. “Yeah, your right, he isn’t really your type. But he was the only available one on a Friday night.”

Y/n rolled her eyes playfully. “Yeah, wonder why.”

Emma tucked a strand of Y/n’s hair behind her ear. “Can I ask you one last favour?”

Y/n frowned eyes sharpening. “I’m not shagging him.”

Emma laughed tossing her head back. “No, not that.”

“Then what?”

“Can you get a lift home with Peter instead of me? I invited Zayn over, Harry’s gone to Niall’s for a bit. I need a good shag, and I need it now.”

Y/n sighed, a big groan leaving her lips. “Fine. But please make this date end soon. I don’t want to miss Murder She Wrote which starts at 9.”

Emma laughed. “Okay Grandma, don’t worry you’ll be tucked in bed in 30 minutes I can guarantee it.”

They stepped outside the loos walking back to their table and Y/n sat down on the side with Peter, sitting as close to the edge as possible. While the three were wrapped up in conversation Y/n quickly checked her phone she had a message from Harry still waiting for her reply.

Harry Styles 🍒 

Call me as soon as you're home. Miss your voice.

This made her smile to herself, hearting the message before returning her attention back to the table. The three of them were talking and Y/n felt herself zone out staring out the window. Rain was dripping down against the windows. She was just thinking of Harry, and internally screaming at the fact she wasn’t on a date with him right now. He had become more clingy than she’d expected over the past few weeks, he called her a fair amount and they snuck talks in private when they could but they hadn’t had a chance to go on another date yet. The way he was so kind and clingy to her was honestly shocking, normally he was the best at a fuck and ghost. She assumed he’d do the same, which she knew she’d just pretend to be fine with and then probably lose her shit when she saw him with another girl.

But nothing had been as explosive as she thought it to be, and that was probably because Emma hadn’t the faintest idea. 

By the time everyone finished their meals Zayn and Emma made a dash for it. Leaving their money on the table with the cheque. Zayn paid half and Peter paid the other. Emma kissed her cheek and patted Peter’s shoulder before the two raced away, giggling. Y/n was cranky at the fact Emma had only thought of herself the whole night and sighed leaning back into the seat of the booth. More than ready to leave.

Y/n frowned to herself as Peter seemed totally intent on keeping her there for a bit more of a chat. 

She tried to be polite about needing to head home. Making up some project she needed to do, but Peter’s hand slid onto her knee and she felt disgust crawl up her spine. She felt uncomfortable.

“Maybe we could just pop into the loos then, I bet your into that kinda thing. Can tell."

Y/n’s jaw dropped and she pushed his hand off quickly, she tapped her phone and Harry’s number dialling instantly. He was in her favourites. She needed his help, she knew he would come. She brought the phone to her ear.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” She said lips curling in anger.

Harry picked up on the second ring. “Hi, Baby.” He said, raspy. There was lots of noise, he must’ve been in the car driving home.

Peter grabbed her wrist and pulled her close. “C’mon, don’t be such a prude. I paid for your dinner. You owe me at least a blowie.”

Harry, spoke over the line into her ear. “Y/n?”

She snatched her wrist out from his rough palm. 

“Get off me!” She shouted and grabbed the last of Emma’s milkshake from the table and threw it onto him. He flinched at the cold milkshake hitting his skin, his Ralph Loren polo was now caked in thick pink liquid, and his ginger hair was now soaked and dripping down over his eyes as he gasped. 

“Bitch!” He shouted, wiping his hand over his eyes.

“Fuck yourself, you pathetic fucking prick.” She shouted pointing her finger at him. Harry had heard the interaction and his fingers curled against the steering wheel, knuckles turning white from his grip. He put his foot on the pedal. He was already turning the car around in her direction.

“Sorry, can you pick me up please, Harry? Peter’s a creep, I need you.”

“Of course, hang tight I’ll be there soon.”

Peter was shouting at her like the pathetic baby he was and some waitresses came over to help clean up the mess she’d made by throwing at him. 

“Sorry,” She whispered to the cherry-haired girl who came over with a cloth and spray. The girl just laughed as Peter rushed over to the manager who had come out at the sound of the ruckus. 

“It’s okay, he seems like he's a bit of a knob.” She said looking over at Y/n. 

“Are you alright?” The blonde waitress asked from the other side of her.

“Yeah, he’s just a handsy asshole,” Y/n explained.

It took only a few minutes before the doorbell rang above the entryway door and Harry entered the restaurant. He looked dishevelled and his eyes were wild as he stepped inside. His hair was wet from having walked from his car to her, the thunderstorm outside had soaked him. The top of his grey hoodie was speckled in rain, and his eyes were all stormy and this dark green that Y/n melted over. He made his way over to her and she felt herself forget for a second why he was here. 

She was just happy to see him.

“You okay?” He asked and she nodded, feeling relief flood her tummy. Harry always made her feel safe. He’d always felt like her protector even growing up. She remembered one time at her school dance some boys were trying to get Emma and Y/n in their car, they were drunk as skunks and she remembered Harry racing over and Y/n’s whose eyes were glassy with worry and he actually rubbed her arm. Then he drove them both to the party and made sure they were okay the whole night. He’d made her feel safe then too.

He rubbed her wrist, almost the same as that night at school. His thumb stroked it softly, as his eyes darted from hers to Peter who was still there. Covered in a milky pink drink, and swearing angrily.

Harry made his way over to him and grabbed him by the collar, in a rush of anger. He was bursting with anger and Y/n watched him surprised in her spot by the waitresses. She watched silently, expecting Harry to just tell him off. But he did more than that, Harry’s fist connected with Peter’s face and it made a slap, and he fell back onto the counter of the register with a bang.

His nose was bleeding upon the impact.

“If you ever touch her again I’ll fucking kill you. You hear me?” The calmness of his tone was actually chilling and Y/n felt herself tense up. Harry pushed him again. She knew if she let him he’d stay and pummel him for the rest of the night.

She walked over quickly and grabbed his arm softly. “C’mon, let’s just go. Can’t beat his awfulness out of him.”

“‘Can try.” He replied but ultimately he listened, pulling her into his side and they both apologised to the staff as they exited the restaurant. Harry’s hand slid into hers and she followed him to his car it was raining bad, big fat droplets hitting their faces as they walked steadily to the car. He opened the door for her and she slid in, he shut it when she was all tucked inside. The rain was coming down heavily and when he plopped in beside her he didn’t start the car, his hair was drenched and his eyelashes were thick with water. His face had turned soft again. He watched her for a beat. “Are you sure you're okay? I can go murder him if you want.”

She was silent for a second before turning to face him, she looked beautiful even with her frown. “Harry’s it’s fine. Can you just take me home?”

He nodded. She looked tired and frustrated, and in turn, this upset him. Y/n was too sweet to be treated like this. He wouldn’t let anything like that happen to her when he was around. He’d take care of his girl. The drive to Y/n’s house from the burger place really wasn’t far and she normally would’ve walked home if not for this heavy downpour of rain, and she had wanted Harry to be the one to comfort her. When Harry’s car pulled up outside the front of the house she looked over at him.

He was waiting for her to say she’d call him later and kiss his cheek but she didn’t. She looked up at him and sighed, bringing her hand up to push a loose curl away from his forehead.

“You wanna come up?” She asked.

He smiled. “You sure?”

She smiled bigger. “Yeah, come on.”

He turned the engine of the car off and just as Y/n went to open the door he said, “Wait.” 

She listened, watching as he bolted out of his side of the car to go to her side and open the door for her. She giggled at the gesture. Harry really wasn’t what people thought. 

He held his hand out for her to grab and she grabbed it as he helped her step down. The rain was heavy but neither of them seemed to care all that much considering they were both already soaking, and walked slowly up to her door. His hand was warm in hers and she shivered into his side. The rain had brought a chill to the air that nipped at her skin.

She unlocked the door and stepped inside pulling him in with her. The house was nice and warm, they’d been lucky enough to have an old fireplace still built in. It warmed the front rooms and meant their heating bill was much less since they only had to take care of a few small rooms. Harry followed her down the hall. 

This was the second time he’d been here, so now he knew where her room was he followed less nervously. The house was practically empty tonight beside from a few people in the living room and kitchen. Everyone must’ve been at one of the frat parties. She opened her bedroom door and they kicked off their shoes and socks that had gotten all soggy. 

Y/n shrugged her small pink coat off and put it over her desk chair. Harry stayed sort of stagnant behind her. Running his fingers through his hair. 

“Are y'cold, H?” She asked gripping the hem of her top, her back was facing him as she lifted it off. Revealing her lacy pink bra and bare back.

He felt his eyes widen and cheeks heat up. She yanked her jeans down and revealed a pink g-string that matched. It had bows on it, and it was all girly and pretty. Suddenly the wholesome urge to take care of her turned back into something a bit less wholesome. His cock twitched as she bent down to take her socks off. He had a great view of her plush perfect body. His hands flexed by his sides, and he looked down at his feet, did she want him to look?

She turned around running a hand through her hair, “Styles? You okay?”

She looked like a fucking dream.

He nodded looking up. “I- Yeah,”

She giggled. “What’s wrong?”

He rolled his eyes sighing, a smile remaining on his face. His cheeks had dusted in a soft pink that was unusual for him and only made Y/n more inclined to tease him. Roles reversed.

“Don’t play all dumb, you know you're fucking gorgeous. And I can’t exactly concentrate when you look at me like that.”

She walked closer to him as her hands slid under his hoodie and thick cotton t-shirt, hands grazing his skin. Her hands were cold, and he hissed slightly but made no movements to step back.  

“Like what?” Her eyelashes fluttered up at him. 

“Like that.” His hands slid around her back and down to cupping her ass in his big hands and bringing her closer to him. Their height difference had him bending down, ready to scoop her up into his arms.

She moved her hands onto his shoulders and pushed herself up on the tips of her toes, lips close to his. “Kiss me.”

He leaned down connecting their lips together. She pulled him closer, whispering against his lips. “‘M cold.” 

He leaned into her touch, she was gripping him tightly against herself. He pulled his arms away from her to lift his jumper off. She gripped the hem of his t-shirt and pulled that off too. His tattoos filled her vision and she wanted to bite and suck and lick and touch every single one of them. God, he was just gorgeous. And honestly, being able to kiss him was more pleasurable than any other experience she’d ever had. Kissing him alone was something she could do for hours. When Harry just looked at her that alone was more breathtaking than anything any other boy had done. To have him here in her room, kissing her, holding her, well it was everything she’d ever dreamed of. If her fourteen-year-old self knew she’d probably faint, scream, cry, and go into shock.

Her hands slid to his hips and gripped the button of his jeans, as his hands found her cheeks and kissed her again. She yanked them down a little bit revealing the fern tattoos she loved so much. She remembers him posting on his Instagram when he’d gotten them, Y/n practically choked on her water when she saw them. He was just walking sex. She wasn't any better than him, completely filthy in that head of hers.

He started walking forward and leading her back to her bed. She sat down on the mattress eyes wild looking up at him. His bulge was right in her eye-line and she smiled up at him, and she grabbed him to join her. He slotted in perfectly into her arms and his hips pressed into the thin string that was covering herself. He wasn’t ashamed that his cock was already growing in size in his pants, and he gently pressed it against her in hopes of some relief to his aching balls.

She sighed breathily into his mouth at the weight of him on top of her, she kept pulling him even closer. Their chests pressed into each other, and Harry was so warm, and Y/n was so soft. He could’ve stayed like that all night, in her arms.

He pecked her lips one last time as he pulled away to kiss along her chest. The little necklace she always wore that Emma had bought her was around her neck. It was the first letter of her name. His finger ran along it, stroking her upper chest.

“Should get a H.” He said before nibbling into the plush flesh of her tits. They were so warm and soft against his face. If he wasn’t so needy for her he’d just rest against them and sleep, smelling her delicious scent of that clean soft scent she always smelt of, it was so comforting to him.

She smiled and softly ran her hands through his hair, her legs were still wrapped around his back. “Why?”

He looked up, and suddenly all those emotions of jealousy and protectiveness were back rushing through him and making his hands squeeze her hips tightly. “So people know you're mine.”

This shocked her a bit and Harry was nervous for a second, he had revealed quite a bit of feelings in that moment and distracted himself with her neck. Kissing along her sweet-smelling skin. His lips were so gentle against her like he was afraid she’d break.

“And then what would you wear to show who you belong to Styles?” She said. Her voice was raspy and breathy from his kisses. His head snapped up and he smirked wickedly. 

“Well, why don’t you mark m’back with your nails like last time, and leave some bruises on m’neck until we can come up with a permanent solution?”

She smiled and felt her pussy throb at the thought. After the last time Harry was between her legs she’d ended up with bruises on her thighs, hickeys everywhere, and she was so sore it hurt to sit all day. She’d told him one night on the phone and he’d lost his mind over it. Loved the idea of Y/n being marked up from him, sore from their sex, unable to sit without thinking of him.

"Sound good, Princess?"

“Okay.” She replied content with his answer. Her lips formed in a pouty kissy face and he came up to press his into hers for a long peck, she smiled when he pulled away. How could he be so cocky and rude but also so soft all at once? He moved his way back down her body and kissed her hips sucking a spot into her left hip. His hand rubbed her stretch marks along there and kissed over the now bruised mark he’d made.

He moved further down until his mouth was right against her pussy. His nose brushed against the material as he looked up at her. “Gonna let me take care of you?”

“Yes, Daddy.”

He smiled. “You’re such a good girl f’me. Perfect lil' thing.”

“Thank you, Daddy.”

He loved when she slipped into that state of submission and obedience because normally, despite her calm presence, she basically never let Harry have anything without being teased. She was a bit of a brat to him, which turned him on an unfathomable about.

He pulled her knickers off and threw them to the side. As he spread her legs even further apart he moved one of her thighs to rest on his shoulder and the other he pushed forward toward her tummy, practically folding her in half. His ring-covered fingers gripped them and he leaned in close to her. The lips of her were like petals of a flower, splayed out and dewy. Her clit was puffy and swollen in arousal like the bud of a flower. He brought his free hand forward and circled her clit softly. Her hips squirmed into his hand and he heard her let out a shaky breath. 

“Ah,” She gasped when he leaned in closer and his breath hit her dripping pussy. It was cool and shiver-inducing and she could practically see his smile, even though her eyes had made their way shut.

He placed a gentle kiss on her clit and her hands moved to his hair quickly. “Please.”

He was teasing her and he loved the reaction it pulled from her. Now that they’d already been together once there was a certain familiarity in this. He knew what she liked and he was ready to explore things that he hadn’t already. Including taking his time and eating her out like he’d been thinking about since he was probably fourteen.

He looked up at her, her lips were in a pout of frustration. “What’s got you pouting, Princess?”

“Want you t’help me, Harry.”

“You can beg better than that, Y/n.”

“Please, Daddy.”

“Please what, Baby?”

“Please taste me, Daddy. Need your mouth. Want it.”

He smirked looking up at her. “‘Atta girl.”

She felt her clit throb at his raspy words. He leaned forward and licked a long stripe of her slick up into his mouth. She tasted tangy and sweet just like he’d imagined. His mouth watered at the taste, and he smirked. Once he’d tasted her he knew he wouldn’t be able to tease her any longer. He started moaning and grunting into her and the vibrations of it had her mewling and tugging on his hair.

“Fuck.” She cried out, neck arching into the pillow.

He was acting like a starved man and sucking onto her clit with such a hunger that it startled her. She hadn’t expected him to be so wild and good at it. She knew he was good, but Jesus, she was already feeling so much pleasure within mere minutes. He was suckling into her bud like a bee on a honeysuckle flower, all headily. The sweet nectar spilled onto his tongue as he kissed her lips, and practically devoured her whole. She was already feeling dreamy with the pleasure, floating with lust.

As he began to speed his tongue up and get more sloppy with his languid movements, she gained less control of her body. Her legs tried to shut on him and they were beginning to shake softly, he gripped them tighter and split her open for him.

His tongue lapped up the slick that was leaking out of her hungrily, and as he slipped his tongue near her weeping hole she let out a particularly loud whine and her back arched off the mattress. “Fuckin’ hell, feels good, Daddy.”

He pulled away for a breath looking up at her, rubbing his thumb over her clit in slow hard circles that had her eyes welling with tears of pleasure. “Yeah, sucha’ good girl letting Daddy eat this little pussy.”

She was bucking her hips and squirming under his tight grip. He could tell she was getting close as she ground against his face, her moans were getting louder and more desperate. Her slick was dribbling down his chin and he was moaning every few licks. He’d taken to rubbing his cock against the edge of the mattress for some relief, and Y/n coming on done from his touch was too much for him to stay still. He needed to relieve himself. Or he’d come his boxers, which he thought we be a bit pathetic. He wanted to prove to her how good he could be with her, how he liked to take his time when he could. But his neediness was making him have a little less control than he liked.

He continued eating her pussy with such a raw animalistic frenzy that her orgasm washed over quickly, taking her by complete surprise. Her tummy filled with waves of pleasure that shot all through her body as her muscles tensed and her pussy throbbed, she could feel herself clamping down onto his tongue as he groaned.

When she came it was with a desperate, soft, cry of his name. “Fuck, Harry.” She said, shutting her eyes and gripping his hair. “‘M cumming.”

“Cum for me, angel.”

She did. Hard. She felt like she had no control of her body as Harry talked her through her orgasm encouragingly. “That’s it, good girl.”

He’d slipped his fingers inside with ease and began curling against her. She felt herself fall back limp into the sheets as he continued licking and thrusting his fingers inside of her, and her hands moved to his hair once again pulling on it. Her mouth was loose-lipped and she found it hard to keep herself quiet now.

“Oh, fuck, Daddy,” She said breathlessly, all soft and quiet. It made him smile as he looked up at her, slick coating his lips. 

“Gonna be a good girl and let me make you cum again?”

She nodded biting her lip. “Mhm.” She said before throwing her head back when his fingers hit that soft spot inside her that she couldn’t reach with her own fingers. It made her melt and shake.

Harry noticed her reaction and smirked to himself. “Found it.”

As she watched him from between her thighs, his head bobbed and the muscle of his arms flexed, he was pinning her to the bed so that he could keep going. Her second orgasm found itself much easier, it took Harry a few kisses and rubs against her clit along with his fingers pounding into her until she came. 

Her legs moved to shut around his head and her nails were scratching along his shoulders and back. She kept repeating the words, “Please, Daddy.” Over and over, until.

“Oh, I think you’re gonna make me cum again.”

He kept his steady pace and sloppy kisses going, pulling away only to say. “Cum for Daddy, pretty girl,”

And she did. It was like his words had complete control over her. The ball growing in her tummy snapped and rushed through her. This time her whole body shook as she gripped onto his arms in support, she felt this release like a tidal wave.“Fuck, fuck, fuck,”

The tightness of her muscles flexing and her body shaking had her spent. She had never come so hard, and it for so long. It was a few minutes before she finally felt the pleasure subside to something more easy to take. 

She was mewling and babbling all drunken from her orgasm. “Jesus, H.”

He helped her through her second orgasm, kissing along her hips and thighs to give her swollen clit a chance to rest. When she finally came down from the peak of her orgasm, she went limp again, eyes shut, and for a moment there she couldn’t hear or see anything. She could only feel him. Feel what he’d made come over her.

When she looked down at him he’d pulled his fingers out only a few centimetres away and his mouth was damp. His chin was covered in slick and as she began to take in his appearance. His neck and the top of his chest was dripping. She was confused for a second, it couldn’t be sweat. Despite their intense state, she knew he couldn’t be sweating that much. And then she realised. 

“Oh, I squirted, sorry.” She said embarrassed trying to shut her legs. He looked at her like she was crazy moving back up so that his hips were between her thighs.

“Sorry? What are you on about? You squirted f’me, and you looked beautiful doing it too. Absolutely nothing to be sorry about.”

She smiled, still feeling shy and blushy. She’d squirted on his dick before, but certainly not his face. She hadn’t expected it to feel so good. “Thank you for making me cum.”

He smiled, and despite his rotten mouth and dominant cocky rough edges, in that moment he looked all soft and gooey and truthfully the fact he got to see Y/n so soft and vulnerable around him made him eternally soft for her. He wanted to see her like this all the time. Red-faced, pouty lips, eyes glassy in pleasure, and words slurring from complete satisfaction. Something only he got to see.

He wanted to be the only person who got her to squirt all over his face. Wanted to be the only one to taste her sweet little pussy. He wanted to be the only man for her. He felt so possessive over her like a kid not wanting to share his favourite toy. But he knew at the end of the day, it was always going to be her decision who she was with. 

But Y/n thought that over the years it was pretty damn obvious who she wanted. 

Harry was the only one for her. 

She wasn’t in some other boy's bed tonight, she was with him right now, running her nails softly along his arms despite how needy they both were for each other. She was slow with her touches like they had all the time in the world because really they did.

It was raining so heavily outside, the wind was howling wildly rustling all the trees nearby, and the thunder roared above them. The shelter her little room provided them with was perfect, and it felt like all time ceased to exist. The sky had turned dark and so had their eyes, her room was almost pitch black, and they were both so warm and close. Skin to skin.

Y/n was right here, naked, and waiting for him. 

Things weren’t so bad after all.

He placed a soft long kiss on her lips and she could taste herself on his tongue. Things tonight felt different than the first time, although Harry was fueled and fiery with jealousy and he wanted to take her roughly, it all felt more intimate.

His hands moved to her hips squeezing the plush flesh and running his hands over the stretch marks that decorated her skin. Every inch of Y/n was beautiful, and he’d never thought that before about anyone. He’d never seen someone's hands and thought what absolutely beautiful hands they had, or what beautiful teeth they had, or how cute their ears were. There wasn’t a part of her body that he wouldn’t worship. 

To him, she was the picture image of beauty.

The kiss deepened as he rolled them over. His head rested where hers just had, and he could feel the warmth her body had left behind. She sat right up against his cock, and she could feel him throbbing against her. His old thin boxers left little room for him to hide his aching want. He was honestly rock hard, watching her cum twice, feeling her, tasting her. It had him so hard he could’ve cried.

Her tits were right in his eyeline, all soft and full. He took one into his mouth sucking on her sensitive nipple, and enjoying the loud whine she let out. His hands had fallen to her ass now, and she’d taken to grinding against his clothed cock. He could feel the wetness of her leaking down onto his boxers and he wanted to stuff her full. Despite her two orgasms, Y/n was still managing just fine on top of him.

She pulled back just slightly so she could grip the hem of his boxers and tug them off. His cock sprang up against his tummy, and even though she’d seen it before she’d probably never get used to how fucking big and gorgeous his cock was. The pink ruddy tip that glistened in precum, his long veiny shaft, that girthiness he had. God she could stare at it for hours, she thinks he is beautiful in the way those ancient paintings of Greek gods were beautiful. His hair was unruly and curly and fit for a golden wreathe to sit, his body all muscular and tanned, his absolute manliness. Something about how capable he was was just enough to have her squirming her thighs.

If she was to paint him, she’d want him to look something like this. Messy, needy, and staring right at her. She moved her hand to grip his cock giving it some gentle strokes, he was hissing already. Her hands were so warm and soft, and she pursed her lips and spat down onto him, allowing her to stroke him faster.

“Such a pretty cock, Daddy.”

He let out a laugh through his moan, “Pretty?”

She nodded. “Just like the rest of you. Beautiful.”

He felt his cheeks warm in a blush. No one had ever called him that before. She was still stroking him and he felt his eyes begin to squeeze shut in pleasure. His hips rutted up into her hand a few times.

“Want to feel this pretty cock, Daddy, please,” She said, her voice in a gentle begging tone.

He opened his eyes and smiled his hand moving from her hip to her cheek stroking it with his thumb. 

“Come sit on it, all yours to sit on, Princess.”

She smiled up at him, kissing his jaw and letting go of his stiffy so that she could move her legs up the bed. When she was hovering over him she placed her arms by his shoulders ready to slide onto him when he stopped her. 

“Wait, condom?” He asked, kissing her nose. 

She shook her head. “Wanna feel you, s’that okay?”

He felt his cock twitch at that. “Yeah, I’m clean, trust you. Want that too.”

She smiled leaning forward to place a kiss on his lips. Her hand grabbed his dick and brought it up between her slick folds, collecting the wetness. She slowly slid down onto it and felt herself stretching for him, her two orgasms allowed more room for him to glide into her easily, but no matter how wet she was his cock was always going to stretch her out.

When she’d made it halfway she looked up at him, “Y'big, sorry,”

He just pushed some hair away from her face, kissing her jaw near her ear. “Take your time.”

Eventually, she made it hilt of him, sitting down on him softly. They both let out heavy sighs at the feeling, she felt so full of him. He was so deep, she could see the bulge of him in her tummy. She leaned her forehead against his shoulder and his hands massaged her thighs softly. If not for their burning desire Harry could’ve stayed just like that for hours. His back against the wall, her resting against him, cock all warm inside her. It was perfect.

She eventually lifted her head up and smeared their lips together in a messy gentle kiss. Her arms wrapped around his back in an embrace as she began to lift herself up and then back down slowly. The stretch starting to burn in pleasure now, and the pain subsiding. He moaned into her mouth loudly as she started to pick up a rhythm of deep hard thrusts. The tip of him was hitting that spot that had her eyes rolling back into her skull as she started to find the rhythm that was right for them both. She was going slow yet hard and deep, it had her pussy clamping down against him which was sending him up the wall.

Her pussy was to die for, so tight, and perfect around his cock. Wet and warm. He wanted to bury himself in it all hours of the day. Her lazy bounces started to pick up as she gripped his shoulders for leverage. His hands moved from her hips to her ass, gripping her tightly as he began to pump his cock up meeting her bounces. He was moaning and grunting into her neck and tits at the feel of her tight pussy, he started kissing her all over.

It was a beautiful sight, his pretty girl's tits bouncing right in front of his face, and her moaning against his cock. He couldn't help but smile, a devilish one.

“Daddy, fuck,” She swore. She was getting close again. Her previous orgasms had her so sensitive to his touch.

One of his hands came forward and began to rub messy circles against her puffy clit. She let out a whine and shut her eyes bouncing as if her life depended on it, his other hand squeezed her ass kneading it roughly, as he thrust his cock up into her pussy.

“You’re Daddy’s good girl aren’t you?”

This made her let out a particularly loud whimper.

“What was that, Princess?”

She just let out another noise of pleasure.

His hand moved up to grip her chin so she’d look at him. “Say it, Y/n. Tell me.”

“I’m your good girl, H.”

He frowned. “H?”

Her hips were stuttering on his cock and the hard rubbing against her clit. “I’m your good girl, Daddy.”

He smirked. “Who’s little pussy does this belong to?”

God, he was filthy. She fucking loved it. It’s what she’d imagined him to be liked. Raw, rough, filthy, dominant, and possessive.

She cried out as his thrusts began to speed up. She was dizzy with it all, struggling to speak.

Her voice came out hoarse and breathless. “Yours,”

“What’s mine, Y/n?”

“My pussy, it’s yours. I'm yours.”

He smirked. “Good girl, sucha' good fucking girl.”

His thrusts caused her entire body to jolt forward, as her nails scratched down his arms and she began to scream at the pleasure. 

“That’s it, take Daddy’s cock,”

She gripped his arms for dear life, “Gunna’ come again. Ah, mm, fuck.”

He didn’t stop for a second and it was only a few thrusts until she was squirted all over his cock and shaking wildly. He could tell he’d fucked her hard because she was practically limp on top of him when her orgasm subsided, she was spent. Harry had ruined her. Three orgasms, three mind-blowing orgasms, she didn’t know if she could handle another.

He kissed her lips. “Good job, sweet girl.”

She smiled dazedly. “Thanks, Daddy.”

“Want me ta’ take care of ya’ now.” His voice hadn't gotten even slower, slurring from the absolute raw fuck he was having.

She nodded and he helped her off him. She fell back onto her bed, back amongst the mess that was her sheets. Her hair lay above her like a crown and he kissed her lips softly, enjoying this gentle side to her. It seems the more she came the softer she got, more clingy, handsy. He fucking loved it. He was sure his shoulders were covered in scratches from her, and his hair had been tugged about by her. He probably looked just as fucked out as her.

She was covered in a light sheen of sweat, and her lips were swollen. She looked up at him fluttering her lashes. Sexiest little thing ever, a total minx. “Want you.” She whispered. She wanted him to cum, fill her up. She'd been thinking about for years, especially lately.

He grabbed her legs spreading them far apart so he could slot in between her. He was sitting up on his knees all tall above her. Her tummy curled in anticipation and desire, he was so fucking hot. His gorgeous veiny hands touched her and those ring-covered fingers of his gripping into her flesh hard. His swirls of ink were still visible under the moonlight. 

He was a sight. A pure filthy sight she wanted to hold onto in her mind forever.

“Want to fill you up, Princess.” He replied. His cock was begging for his orgasm, he’d managed to last through one of her orgasms pulsing against him, but he knew the next one would push him over the edge. He slowly slipped inside of her, and her hands found their way to his arms, gripping them hard.

He started thrusting roughly without much warning, causing her bed to shift and creak under the weight of them both. She moaned loudly, “Oh, fuck,”

With each thrust her body jolted into the bed, as she tried to find a way to control her squirming body.

He let out a hiss as his balls slapped against her ass. “Feel so good around me, sweet girl. Fuckin' perfect. Made for this cock.”

She pulled him closer so that her chest was pressed into his. His face slipped into the side of her neck and shoulder and gently kissed along there. One of her arms wrapped around his back and the other found his hand, he held hers tightly. He continued fucking into her deep, it felt so good it hurt and her hips jutted to meet his.

“‘Wanna cum, Daddy, can I?” She said softly, in a pleading tone that had his balls aching to fill her pussy up with his hot cum. He grunted pounding into her just that bit harder, this final bundle of energy he had was going toward making her finish.

She felt her tummy tightening familiarly with her orgasm. She knew that she couldn’t hold onto it much longer.

“Cum f’me please, Y/n.” He whimpered, “Be a good girl and let me feel you cum on m’cock.”

His hand held hers tightly, and this romantic intimate side of him was all too much for her, this was somehow hotter than his rough side. She loved to see him like this.

She pulled his face to hers, and they kissed as she finished. It was all teeth and tongue, noses brushing into each other, and she cried out into his mouth. He nibbled her lip and felt her clamping against him rapidly.

When he pulled back from the kiss they were breathless, each thrust had her practically crying out.

“Gonna make me cum, Y/n,” He whispered. “Where do you want me cum?”

She wrapped her legs around his hips. “Inside me, please, Daddy.”

When he made eye contact with her that’s when he finally orgasmed. The thrusts of his hips grew sloppy with pleasure as he let out a loud moan of her name and some curses. She was scratching his arm and back softly letting him fuck her full of his cum as his pleasure subsided. He didn’t move out of her, just landed on top of her. His head resting right above her fast-beating heart. He was fucking spent.

She stroked his hair feeling nice and full of him. She could feel his cum inside her, dripping out onto his cock. He was warm and big to cuddle she loved it. He lifted his head up when he caught his breath, placing a kiss on her forehead, then her nose, then her cheeks which made her giggle, then finally her lips.

“You’re so beautiful.” He whispered.

“Oh, shut up Styles, I already let you fuck me, no need to butter me up now.” She teased.

He rolled his eyes, still inside her, still holding her hand. “You’ve always been beautiful, most gorgeous girl in the whole world.”

Her face turned soft, cheeks blooming in a soft dusty rose. “You’re beautiful too.”

He smiled. “Thank you.”

Eventually, he pulled out of her, she felt empty and whined at the feeling. She was so sensitive now. She honestly wouldn't have minded if he'd stayed inside her for the rest of the night.

She shut her eyes and as he sat back, he watched his cum drip out of her. It made his tummy flutter. He knows he shouldn’t be thinking this far ahead considering Y/n and him weren’t even dating. But if she got pregnant with his baby, that would be the cutest thing in the world. He cut those thoughts from his mind and stood up. 

“Gonna clean y’up.” He said, walking to her bathroom. He found a cloth in there and wet it with some warm water walking over to the bed. 

She opened her eyes which had turned bleary with sleepiness. She smiled tiredly over at him. He smiled back, grabbing her legs and spreading them so he could wipe her down. She whined at the touch of the cloth.

“Sorry, Baby.”

She let out another soft wince. “S’okay, worth it.”

As he stared down at her he noticed how sweaty she looked. “Wanna shower? I’ll help you. We probably should after all that rain and other stuff.”

She nodded, a small laugh leaving her mouth. “Okay, just don’t let me fall asleep and drown in there.”

He laughed. “Course not.”

He helped her up to a sitting position and she looked up at him sluggishly. “Really got me sore, H.”

He frowned. “Sorry, Angel.”

She teasingly sharpened her gaze, “You aren’t sorry, you filthy boy.”

He smirked. “‘M not sorry for taking what’s mine, I am sorry you’ll be sore tomorrow.”

She rolled her eyes. “You will be sorry when I keep complaining.”

"I'll massage you, don't worry."

He picked her up startling her, she always knew he was strong but never expected him to pick her up with such ease, and if she wasn’t totally spent she’d want to test what also he could do with those big muscles. Throw her around maybe? Fuck her standing up? She’d make a note to herself to try that later.

His hands were under bum and as he walked to the bathroom, the shower was surprisingly big and had a tiny little shelve that came out which had all her soaps and shampoos, but there was enough room for her to sit on it.

He turned the water on warm and placed her onto the sink bench. She watched him under the pale light of the bathroom. How was this the same Harry from before?

This was a soft kind man, a gentleman, hardly a frat boy dick. She didn't know where'd he been hiding this side of him. But she liked him just as much as he did the rotten-mouthed boy she knew.

In the shower he took care of her as promised, washing her hair with the lavender-scented shampoo she owned. He used some too, and he helped wash her skin with this fresh-smelling shower oil she had. Softly cleaning her sore parts and he massaged her body with such a gentleness that she melted right into his hands.

She’d never expected Harry to be one to stay and cuddle after, let alone help shower. He was so nurturing to her. It made her feelings bloom and spread through her body like wildflowers.

When they were both clean Harry even helped her dry her hair, and change into some comfy clothes. While she was brushing her teeth and putting some skincare on he fixed up her sheets and tucked himself into them. He'd put his rings in the little dish she had on her bedside table. Checking his phone to see it was late. They'd been going for a while.

When she came out in a baggy shirt that Harry had worn last time he was here, it still smelt of him, and some little black knickers he felt his heart skip a beat. She looked especially good in his clothes.

“C’mere.” He opened the duvet and she slid in beside him tiredly. He pulled her close, right in the crook of his chest, he’d decided to wear nothing to bed. Which bothered neither of them. He ran hot, especially with Y/n snuggling right up against him.

Her window was open letting the heavy downpour of thunder and rain become background noise as they fell asleep. He kissed her temple, rubbing her back underneath his shirt.

“Night, Beautiful.”

She shut her eyes kissing one of the swallows on his chest. “Night, Styles.”

Sleep found them both quickly and Harry held onto her the whole night. He was completely smitten with her, the one girl he couldn’t have was the only one he wanted. Fuck. They were so screwed.

PART THREE???????

[bynineb]

What pieces of media are your biggest creature design inspirations?

ooh how fun! let's see...

Pokemon Crystal (Ken Sugimori)

(src: Bulbapedia)

I had a Pokemon Crystal strategy guide with all 251 Pokemon in it that I studied religiously when it came to making monsters of my own. I love Ken Sugimori's illustrations so much - the dappled paint makes it so soft, gives everything the feeling of being struck by light dancing down from foliage above. The subtle implied detailing with line strokes and shadow allows the imagination to run wild. They, truly, feel like creatures to have adventures with. And of course, Pokemon is a juggernaut of an RPG, facilitating those childhood fantasies, and then there's a TV show showing them playing and shouting their name and fighting... No wonder so many people got hooked on it!

Dragon Warrior Monsters 2 (Akira Toriyama)

(src: Dragon's Den)

Since they're designed as enemies foremost, Dragon Quest's monsters can get a lot kookier & scarier than Pokemon can. And Toriyama gives his monster designs so much charm and personality! You feel like he always has fun coming up with them, and it makes every Dragon Quest game more delightful for having them be your foes (and sometimes friends). Also, all the English names are puns and portmanteaus and other fun word things!

After Armageddon Gaiden (artist unknown - dev is PandoraBox)

(src: Bogleech, who also wrote a wonderful article on these critters: https://bogleech.com/halloween/hall18-aagolem)

Uniquely grotesque beasts from a deeply obscure Japanese RPG named After Armageddon Gaiden, the second in a duology about player-controlled demons fighting alien invaders. Some of the designs get quite gory or disturbing, fair warning. But in a cool way!! The sheer strangeness of these designs are something to behold!... And they have the best names ever, like "Barabumblebo"...

YU-GI-OH early card art (Kazuki Takahashi)

(src: Yugioh fandom page)

Yu-Gi-Oh's early monster designs are something I think about a lot. I don't know what that says about me, but I do know they're unbelievably cool, a blend of genuinely scary Egyptian-flavored horror and wacky, tropey, cartoony fantasy. The fact that these ridiculous designs are frequently art for a card that's completely worthless in terms of winning duels, combined with their randomly specific descriptions about how unbelievably powerful they are, gives them a certain mystique. It's as if the creature you see depicted truly exists as a part of some greater fantasy world...

Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time

(src: me, many moons ago)

Seeing properly scary monsters inside a strange virtual world in Ocarina of Time was quite the experience for my young self. For example, I had nightmares about the Stalchildren who used to burst, endlessly, from the ground of the strangely empty Hyrule Field. But that also made it feel like such an adventure! The thrill added to the experience. And even many of the game's races are quite monsterlike; Gorons, Zora, Deku, and so forth. This had me imagine turning a "bad" creature into a friend, a concept I cherish to this day... hence Love-Love here.

Well that's that! Thanks for asking, this was fun to write : )

[sanzaibian]

Which writers do you recommend ? What stories did you like?

I follow quite a bit of creators, so it would be quite overwhelming to include all of them ! So I'll only include those I especially like and have things to say about.

I'll of course shoutout @joshslater, he's honestly a bit of an idol to me, since his stories are always so imaginative - and well-written ! In that category I also add @salmonskinrolltf of which I especially like the multi-parters, and how he explores a gimmick very thoroughly, @maletfsstories who always write great stories that hook me up even on kinks I don't have, and @rozza22365 who basically was the one to introduce me to the guilty pleasure of gay to straight by his thrilling prose !

I'll also shoutout the very prolific @papermoon357 (because, let's be honest, who wouldn't !), whose skill really shines in the stories he posts between captions, @fredwkong and @octuscle who both have a similar style of reader-driven posting that brings a ton of varied content, with each their own spin (thinking about it, it might very well be in the continuation of the style of feu collegenerdtojock, whose tumblr has been taken over by pastry for some reason), as well as @coyotes-rules-of-change who always nails down perfectly what I find hot in tf !

And for newer writers, I'll shoutout @occamstfs who does an extremely good job, @tidetfs who seems to have pretty similar interests as me, and @alphajocklover who kinda does have that old tumblr tf community vibe to his stories !

Finally, a few mentions that I don't know how to group, I shoutout @dreamingtf and his stories that very often make me feel good, @idesofrevolution who has a nack of writing immersive stories, and @nonotnolan who writes some really sweet love stories ^^ (and I'll add an honorable mention to Programming Prince, who was banned multiple times from Tumblr, and since quit writing stories, but was very impactful in my introduction to the community ^^)

As for stories, well, you make me dig deeper, the list has already been so long to write ! But here are some of my all-time favorites, of which I link through my likes/main blog (so that if the link perishes, it perishes with that account ^^') :

@fullfriendnerdpurse's trio of alpha car, forced imposter and how to make a douchebag (not the actual title), all are great concepts of which I love to throw myself inside, and I think could all make a thrilling longer story, @rozza22365's Brotherly Changes, that one story that convinced me to follow him, @alphajocklover's Unmoved, which resonates with my personnal experiences a lot, feu tyranitartf's I'm a dumb jock, very hypnotic and thrilling, @anomanlyarchives' text message swap (not the actual title), of which I love the love story, I-don't-remember-whom's Chess Rival, republished by @marcoh1234, a good all classic that just doesn't get old, @erogenousmind's Turing, one of those stories that just scratches my existential horror erotica itch, @0ng0ingw0rk's To Love and to Cherish..., a great love story, @joshslater's Wet Dreams, the story I blame for my diaper fetish, Happy Endings' The Mind Palace (gayspiralstories), honestly my favorite story of all times, I love the concept, love the execution, the sweetness and the corruption. I do an RP on it (or at least did until I took a break), and I think that's the one concept I won't be bored of ^^'

There's a buch of other stories I love and would love to show off better, but that list is already long enough, so I focused on the most impactful stories ^^'

[sandybrett]

Here are my completely honest thoughts on a bunch of audio dramas I've checked out. (Don't worry, nothing scathing, they're all reasonably good. But please proceed with caution, or don't proceed, if you're involved in creating any of these shows.)

In the order I first listened:

The Storage Papers: Nine episodes in. A little slow paced, but I've heard it picks up in the later seasons. My only real concern is that it seems like a lot of the horror revolves around "this thing looks sort of like a human but it's Wrong somehow. also it kills people (or cats)." I hope at some point we meet a creature that looks and acts as unsettling as the Grinner but is nice, or at least complicated.

The Cellar Letters: Seven episodes in. I LOVE it. I love the natural-feeling messiness of it, the way Nate and Steve talk in circles and go back and forth on what to believe. It's made me laugh out loud multiple times. I can't wait to learn more about that weird little room full of letters with that one random word written on the wall (I forget what).

400 Words a Horror: Three episodes in. I had to re-listen to the first episode because I hadn't been paying enough attention, but I think that particular episode rewards re-listening anyway. Also it is the only show on this list that genuinely frightens me so I have to pace myself. Very good.

Tin Can Audio Presents: Middle:Below: Two episodes in. I won't say I'm hooked, but I am somewhat interested. It's a lot more relaxing than the other podcasts on this list, so I keep thinking I'll save it for listening closer to bedtime, then not getting around to it.

The Grotto: Six episodes in. Very much enjoying. I was SO proud of myself for correctly guessing the twist in the second episode. I love the characters and am extremely intrigued by the mysteries. My only criticism is that the musical interludes drag on too long. And I'm saying that as a WOE.BEGONE fan.

Soul Operator: Three episodes in. It's good but there isn't any particular element that's drawing me in just yet. There's a lot I don't know about the world yet, though, so there is still plenty of time for me to fall in love with this show. (Irrelevant note: I always get "Smooth Operator" by Sade stuck in my head when I think about this show.)

Shadows at the Door: Listened to half of the first episode. It was somewhat interesting, but I decided I had higher priorities for my listening time than disconnected hour-long episodes that are only *somewhat* interesting.

Archive 81: Five episodes in. Quite possibly going to become a major obsession. It's got everything: playing with point of view; the Power of Storytelling but in a menacing way; vivid character voices; probably a cult. I particularly love the way conversations play out on this show--I don't know exactly how to explain it but there's a certain... friction that happens in real conversations but rarely in fictional ones outside cringe comedy. I don't usually enjoy that sort of thing when it's played for laughs, but for realism or suspense? I eat that up. It does make me a little tense so this is another show I pace myself with and I'm glad the episodes are short.

Alice Isn't Dead: Two episodes in. I'm not going to make it a priority--it's got a similar sort of surrealism to Night Vale, but with higher stakes and less humor, and I had enough trouble getting immersed in Night Vale. I could probably enjoy it if I gave it enough time, but for now I'd rather focus on *gestures at some of the shows above*

The Silt Verses: Listened to the first ten minutes of the first episode and got bored, which I think says as much about me as it does about the show. It does get off to a bit of a slow start and leaves more space between lines of dialogue than most of these shows do, but I could probably get into it with adequate time and sleep. Not prioritizing it, for similar reasons to Alice.

[izunias-meme-hole]

Top 15 Final Fantasy Villains

(In My Opinion)

Number 1. Sephiroth (Final Fantasy VII) - Sephiroth is one of the hardest bosses in gaming and a genuine horror villain. He is a tragic monster born from science, and a loyal “son” fo his alien mother, Jenova, but he’s still scary as hell thanks to his god complex, unlimited strength, ethereal vibes, years of experience, his ability to live off of pure spite just so he can make the lives of his enemies (and Cloud) complete hell. His appearance in of itself is creepy due to how beautiful, yet unsettling it is, thanks to his silver hair, green snake-like eyes, and perfect physique which is complimented by a black coat. However the most dangerous things about him are that he’s completely delusional, his strength is unmatched, and just how far he’s willing to go to distort other peoples sense reality, specifically Cloud’s sense of reality. Sephiroth a tragic character and a phenomenal villain.

Number 2. Kefka (Final Fantasy VI) - Were it not for Sephiroth’s existence, and the fact that this clown’s debut game being at the end of an era, Kefka would definitely be number 1 on here, and get more respect. Aside from that, Kefka is basically what Majora is to the Zelda series. A completely insane, and legitimately funny villain with a desire to destroy everything, however the difference is that Kefka is a mere jester with magic powers that became god! Plus he actually did send the world into ruin, but because of a little group of heros with hope, he was utterly defeated. So while Sephiroth is indeed ethereal, delusional as hell, and a horrifying nemesis, Kefka is the better manifestation of the pure unadulterated evil a person can bring, with the right tools.

Number 3. Ardyn (Final Fantasy XV) - Ardyn Lucis “Izunia” Caelum is the near perfect mixture between Sephiroth and Kefka in a way. He’s got the same “funny man wants to watch the world burn” vibes like Kefka, but he’s also a creepy, vengeful, tragic, and very personal villain, much like Sephiroth. Ardyn was once a messiah, a healer who was going to become a king, before he was betrayed by his brother, Somnus, and the gods, and cursed to be made immortal via daemons. So after centuries of imprisonment, he decides to take revenge upon his own kin, AND the gods. A simple motive, but in all honesty the amount of trolling he does in order to achieve  it, is truly gut wrenching sometimes, and it gives you the motivation to plunge your blade into his chest, but at the same time… you kinda feel slightly bad while doing it too for some reason. He's a villain that you love, hate, and pity in the end.

Number 4. Kuja (Final Fantasy IX) - Kuja is one of the more unique Final Fantasy villains because of his personality. He’s a narcissist that wants to destory, which isn’t new for most JRPG villains, but he’s also flamboyant as hell, and talks as if he’s in some kind of play where the world is his stage. He isn’t funny like Kefka, nor is he as intimidating as Sephiroth, but you can feel that wasn’t the route the writers were taking with his character. If anything he’s a pitiable, destructive, and flamboyant narcissist, but the Dissida series expands upon his character a lot in a way that kinda gets you hooked. So yeah, Kuja is unique alright.

Number 5. Ultimecia (Final Fantasy VIII) - This time manipulating witch is all style over substance, but god damn her style is really terrifying. She also has quite the presence, much like Sephiroth before her, so its not like she's sitting on her ass all day.

Number 6. Professor Hojo (Final Fantasy VII) - Wow, another FFVII villain, and it's Sephiroth's piece of shit mad scientist dad, Professor Hojo. This walking mass of complexes is a perfect example of the "Greater-Scope Villain." Never taking away from the Big Bad's spotlight, yet is responsible for almost half of the shit in the narrative. Though responsible for many things, his most noticeable crimes against nature were his experiments with Jenova, and the creation of Sephiroth, whom he also experimented on throughout his whole life. Pretty easy to see why Sephiroth was doomed from the start.

Number 7. Vayne Solidor (Final Fantasy XII) - A politician who wants to give the freedom of choice back to man, and preserve his family’s status and power. Those were Vayne’s end goals, and his personality is that of the ideal of a politician. He’s charismatic, ruthless, and levelheaded, so he’s surprisingly one of the more sane Final Fantasy villains too, but that doesn’t mean he’s the least evil.

Number 8. Garland/Chaos (Final Fantasy) - The first man to go by the title of Chaos. Jack Garland was seemingly a generic princess kidnapping video game villain, and he was the first boss in the first game. Granted he did have a small bit of backstory that explains that he was a former knight of Corneria who went mad, and wanted world dominations, but it wasn't enough at the moment. A couple of hours of gameplay later, along with some buildup of the entity known as "Chaos," we find out that Garland IS Chaos, and has practically made himself immortal thanks to a time loop he created with the Four Fiends, whom he sent into the future. Granted he's still a very simple antagonist if we're talking about goals, but in terms of how he went about it, he set up a standard for other villains in the series to surpass.

Number 9. Exdeath (Final Fantasy V) - Raw menace, ham and cheese, presence, permanently killing one of the main characters, and THE VOID. Exdeath was just a delightfully evil bastard, and it's all explained by him literally just being all of the evil in the universe that was sealed inside of a tree of all things. Bro really was "born evil."

Number 10. Rufus Shinra (Final Fantasy VII) - This man is the literal definition of a "Magnificent Bastard." Calm in almost every given situation, legitimately intelligent and level headed, smug as shit, and has the occasional "pet the dog" moments. Rufus Shinra pretty much has it all.

Number 11. Emet-Selch (Final Fantasy XIV) - He has gone by several names, led two empires, and lived thousands of lives, one of the most prominent antagonists in the entire game, but this man will forever be known as Emet-Selch, a.k.a Hades and Solus Soz Galvus. While he never appeared onscreen at first, we did know him as the founder of the Garlean Empire, and the emperor in the first 2 parts of the game, until we saw him in the flesh in Stormblood and Shadowbringers, and good lord he's surprisingly good. He does share some of Ardyn’s vibes, but compared to that glorious troll, Emet acts like a worn out and bitter old man, which is very fitting when you remember that he constantly reflects upon his great his old life was, and lived in a replica of his former home with the souls of his fallen comrades. Jesus Christ, no wonder his real name is Hades, the man is constantly surrounded by the dead in both a literal and metaphorical sense. Compared to the top picks he isn’t that great, but considering how well done he actually is, in-spite of how much people kinda oversell him, this is a decent placement.

Number 12. Sin (Final Fantasy X) - Ever wanted to see Jaws in a Final Fantasy game? Well that's what Sin was. Granted, it’s goddamn terrifying, unforgettable, and moves the plot, but it doesn’t really have much to it outside of being this eldirch whale monster that was created to destroy. Still it makes the goddamn most out of what it is.

Number 13. Ultima (Final Fantasy XVI) - Oh god where do I begin? There's a great amount of stuff that the writers of this great game got right when deciding to make their main villain a literal eldritch god, and he's honestly fascinating in some areas. His buildup is similar to Sephiroth's, his terror level is 100% its own thing that's worthy of him, and good god the way he operates is honestly something to behold. Yet he falls off the mark in a lot of ways. He isn't a bad villain, and honestly is overhated sometimes, but good god a fair amount of potential was missed.

Number 14. Golbez (Final Fantasy IV) - The first Darth Vader expy of the series, and goddamn he’s surprisingly good. Keyword good, not great.

Number 15. Caius Ballad (Final Fantasy XIII-2) - Another tragic immortal, however this one is a former time traveling protector. My thoughts on this guy are mixed. On one hand, as the main antagonist of FF XIII-2, he's great on a lot of angles. On the other hand he, much like half of the FF XIII trilogy's cast, suffer heavily from its writing. Still, his stripes aren't unearned.

[moonlitempty]

Shaun of the Dead (2004), Dir. Edgar Wright, Starring Simon Pegg, and Nick Frost.

A romantic comedy, with zombies.

For a while now, I have kept movie entries in my personal journal, it feels like a tangible way to commemorate and preserve a movie I feel deserves such attention, and even before I started that habit, I was intimidated by the entries for The Cornetto Trilogy.

All three movies were just so special and influential to me, and physical writing has a tendency to, y’know, get fucked up, so it was a struggle figuring out a way to both preserve my love for these films on my journal, and make it look mildly cute. Safe to say, I think I’ve achieved said balance.

This is the entry for Shaun! I tried to feature a lot of blood splatter/bloodstain motifs, in accordance to the movie obviously, and you might think the b&w colour scheme of the printed images was intentional, but the sad and almost hilarious truth is that it was a limitation! My printer is a laser printer, and those can’t do colours. So I tried to reach a monochromatic style with these entries, where I highlight one single colour that I think is reminiscent of the movie. For Shaun, it was obviously red.

I am not a movie critic (even if I like to think I am), so the personal thoughts section of the entry may come off as shallow or void of detail, I’m sorry about that! But if we’re honest, at this point in time, my love for these films should not be a point of doubt, even if my written thoughts are lax at best.

I remember the first time I actually *heard* of Shaun of the Dead, it was via a kill count video on youtube, and even then I was intrigued by it, all the love and praise I had heard directed towards it was something that drew me in, I didn’t actively search out the movie just yet, I just kept it as a mental memo that I’d get to later.

Then, on one magical night, and by pure fate, I stumbled upon the film on cable TV, I was channel hopping and seeing the title on the screen made my eyes light up, this was my chance to see what all the *fuzz* was about. So I didn’t hesitate and I changed the channel from VH1, to experience the Shauning. My life changed at that instant.

Shaun of the Dead was the most charming and charismatic film I had seen up until that point, I had heard about how flawlessly it was edited and how well every single joke landed, but experiencing said praises in the flesh was phenomenal, and Simon’s role as Shaun was instantly memorable and you could say he was the thing that hooked me in. He was so cynical and snarky, yet caring and loving of the band of misfits he was surrounded by. Though Nick as Ed was also an incredibly charming experience.

I remember just being completely entranced by everything surrounding the film, the movie kept going on and on and I kept finding stuff to love about it. The fact that it was clearly a movie that didn’t take itself too seriously as to be a de facto horror movie, yet it still conveyed emotions in a serious and profound way just really stuck a chord with me, and I’m sure everyone already praises this particular quality, but the quick, snappy and dynamic directing and editing choices characteristic of Edgar Wright are just lovely.

They manage to make the movie feel novel and it hooks you in, without risking making it feel overwhelming and too distracting. And I haven’t even mentioned the score and songs featured in the movie! While the film is perfect on a purely visual standpoint, the accompanying music on every scene elevates the overall feel of the scene you happen to be watching. Whether it be the mundane feeling of Shaun’s daily life, or the dread of the slow realisation that something ain’t quite right in London, or the inspiration and undying will to keep surviving and overcoming.

Frankly, I could go on and on and on about how much I adore this film, about how much it helped me deepen the love I have for filmmaking, and how much it even inspired to purchase filmmaking. But let’s be blunt, you guys probably don’t want to read my ramblings any longer, (but if you do for any reason, do let me know! I love feeling like my opinion matters in any way).

So, Shaun of the Dead! If I could, I’d screen you to any person who even breathes in my direction, I love you so much and I’m sure I’ll rewatch you as soon as I get the TV to myself.

10/10.

[tmntxthings]

request: can I get a platonic Rise!Turtles(mainly Mikey cus I love that boy way too much, also can you add April if possible?) x GN/Male Reader. The prompt is that the reader is this omniscient spirit-like entity from a different dimension who likes to travel through worlds and interact with them or simply watch them from afar through astral projection and just so happened to lend into this one and had caught an interest by the Turtles(because they're the only beings so far that radiate magic energy) and decided to follow them around

In This World

author’s note: omigosh so sorry for the wait, I rlly rlly rlly rlly hope you enjoy >.< to tumblr, u need auto save, like I was almost done (._.) three perspectives are missing, don’t do this to me AGH

warnings: platonic relationships, fluff, comfort, unedited

—————————————————————————

Leo

Leo never thought a silly game of ouija board would amount to anything other than him scaring the bejesus out of Raph and Mikey, he didn’t have any hopes to scare Don. But as fate had it, unbeknownst to them all, you were watching the game and decided to have a little fun.

Now Leo had planned on pushing the piece around the board, and acting as if a ghost had done so. But before he could apply much pressure the little glass piecing was already moving to the letter ‘y’ after he had asked “Is anyone out there?” Leo immediately suspected Donnie had went ahead and moved it so Leo shot him a glare

But Donnie was raising his eyebrows and giving him a look that said what?? “Alright wait a minute, everyone let go..” Leo said and everyone retracted their fingers from the glass piece. “Is anyone out there?” He asked again and watched in horror as the piece moved on its own. Spelling out yes.

All the brothers were up from their spots around the board, running to the edges of the room and screaming bloody murder! “A GHOST IS HAUNTING US!!!” Leo couldn’t believe it, he thought everything had a rational explanation, but he couldn’t exactly refute what his eyes were seeing.

After things settled down and more questions were asked, full blown conversations had with not a ghost they found out but you! Turns out Donnie’s whole theory about the multiverse and space time continuum was true, Leo didn’t know what that all meant but basically it meant you weren’t dead, nor a ghost, nor haunting anyone, though you admitted to them all that you found them very entertaining

Leo might’ve become a little more entertaining after that, but the coolest part was when you finally revealed your astral projection/image, the two of you got into trouble plenty of times after that, mega pranks being pulled, if Leo was ever bored out of his mind, he’d go to you with a big smirking expression on his face, “Y/n~~~~ who do you wanna prank this time???”

Donnie

After finding about your existence you better bet your bottom dollar that Donnie is taking the ouija board in his lab and asking all the questions his big brain can think of, this turtle has some hard hitting inquiries too. “How is this possible?” “How does your power work?” “How many realities have you been to?” “What made you stop in this one specifically?”

Come to find out, the turtles mystic energy is off the charts after the events with the kraang. I was drawn to your power signatures but I stayed because it’s never a boring day here, you tried your best to answer all of Donnie’s questions, you found it quite endearing how curious he was, to you having become used to the traveling you didn’t think it was that special

Donnie would try conducting experiments once you revealed your astral form, though much to his dismay he found that he couldn’t exactly hook you up to a bunch of wires, they’d just fall to the ground right through you, what boggled his mind completely was when you would hand the wires back to him with a shrug, not being able to explain how you could touch things, yet things couldn’t touch you

The logic befuddled the genius turtle, but it seemed a lot of things as of late were defying logic and reason, don’t even get him started about the whole gravity situation by metro tower during the kraang invasion, some things just weren’t meant to be explained, he guessed he would have to classify it as magic: science that has yet to be understood.

“Y/n I think I’ve come up with an alternative method of experimentation,” Donnie said as soon as you floated into the lab, “but if this fails I have 36 new questions I would like to discuss.” His goggles come down looking real scientific, definitely meaning business as you held back a smile, his enthusiasm to learn knows no bounds!

Splinter

Splinter was used to the crazy weirdness of the world. So he wasn’t that shocked when his sons finally introduced you to him. You reminded him so much of the Hamato Clan legacy, how they too showed up in a similar form as yours, helping Splinter and his sons when they needed it most.

He didn’t mind your presence when you came to float by his recliner in the projector room. As time passed he came to accept you just like he had with April. “Hello friend #2” he’d smile, Hello Master Splinter~ you would reply. You would indulge him as he talked about his past and adventures as Lou Jitsu.

Sometimes late at night when the brothers were all asleep, you would float back into the room to see Splinter was still awake, on those nights he would talk to you about his worries, how he didn’t think he did a good job raising his sons, how he wished he could’ve done things better, he wished he would’ve thought more about them than himself..

Well, I think they turned out to be just fine, but I think you still have time! They may be teenagers but they still look up to you greatly! Splinter would nod, it would get quiet and he’d stare off at the projection, not paying much attention to the commercials. “Yes, I think that is what I shall do.”

“Don’t tell my sons, but you are my favorite.” Splinter said sneakily as he looked over the recliner to make sure neither Red nor Orange heard. Purple would be absolutely devastated. Blue probably not so much, though Splinter loved him, all his sons. Your secret’s safe with me you promised.

Raph

Raph would be skeptical about you at first, he didn’t have a good track record with beings from other places. Especially since they had finally recovered from the kraang. But with time he came around, realizing you were different, you meant no harm to them or the rest of humanity for that matter.

Though you did like to pull pranks with Leo, which Raph was a victim of plenty a times. Poor guy actually would let a high-pitched scream every time you would pop in to hang out with him. Raph may be the biggest and strongest, but that didn’t mean he didn’t have fears. He hated scary movies and you resembled what he would call a ghost for a lack of a better term.

“AH! Oh- it’s you!” He’d breath out in relief as you smiled sheepishly. The whole lair would know whenever you tried to hang out with Raph. Which would mostly be when he was working out or training. One time when he had finished a particular brutal workout he had been too tired to pick up the weights.

I can help, you offered and floated over to the heaviest dumbbell. You picked it up with ease and floated over to where they were stored. All the while Raph’s mouth was gaping in complete shock. “You’re really strong!!” He gushed, the only other person who could lift that besides himself was Mikey when he was using his mystic abilities.

You didn’t have the heart to explain to Raph that it all came down to mental will, which as a reality shifter you had a lot of, so it just came down to how badly you wanted to pick up the weight. He watched as you quickly cleared up the rest, Raph would definitely be asking you to workout with him!

Mikey

Mikey was also afraid of you at first, but he came to trust you way more swiftly than Raph. He absolutely loved the idea of having a friend who was ready and waiting to hang out! He’d call out to you to do just about anything together. “Hey Y/n do you wanna watch me color? Look I made this for you yesterday!”

Wow Mikey, it’s gorgeous! Thank you so much you beamed as he added it to your designated pile since you didn’t have a place to put them. He would ask you if you wanted to watch him cook, or to watch videos with him, or if you wanted to go out to the surface together!

Mikey rarely wanted alone time, and if you weren’t hanging out with one of his brothers then you were there by Mikey’s side, listening to his rambling. One day he took you by surprise, turning to you, looking down as his fingers came together. “Y/n?” Yes Mike? “Do you think if I made a portal, I could reach your reality? Then maybe we could hangout.. for real?”

You listened intently, you knew of Mikey’s powerful abilities, his mystic energy was the greatest out of all his brothers. You had been drawn to it like a moth to a flame. Though that may be possible, I am perfectly happy with the way things are now… thank you for the offer though Sweet Mikey

You smiled at him as he looked up with a slight smile, sighing, “yeah you’re right things are fine this way,” he didn’t want to admit it to himself but it would probably take a lot out of him to make another portal so soon. As long as you were happy though Mikey wouldn’t do anything risky. “You just let me know if you change your mind Y/n, maybe Donnie could help too!”

April

Now you weren’t exactly the normal friend that April had been hoping for, but a new/astral projection/person was a friend nonetheless. During the day when the turtles were asleep you would hang out with April. She was very aware you were around during school, seeing you pull pranks inconspicuously.

Those pranks were mainly pulled on the students who gave April a hard time, aka bullies. They’d be bending down to use the water fountain and it would suddenly be spraying them in the face. You tried to keep it toned down since you didn’t want rumors of the high school being haunted spread around.

April would always shake her head saying she didn’t you to do that. But you could tell she secretly liked the thought of having a friend who wanted to stick up for her. Someone who could extract a little harmless vengeance. “Yo! Y/n you there?” April would be walking home from a long day at school and the sidewalks quieted down with little to no traffic. You would appear floating next to her, Yup! How was your day?

April rolled her eyes, like you didn’t already know every little detail. But she obliged, telling her point of view and how she was feeling, what she was looking forward to. “I’ll be heading to the boys later tonight, can you let them know for me?” You gave her a thumbs up and she waved goodbye as she entered her apartment complex.

[aerodaltonimperial]

✨Fic Writing Review 2023✨

Tagged by @rosabellebelieve and oh girl. Ain't nobody ready for these stats LOL. Uh oh. Also, I've removed all collab fics for purposes of this, as it doesn't really seem fair since I only wrote, like, half of them lmao.

Words and Fics

268,626 words in 2023 (mother of god)

52 fics on AO3 (dear christ)

I'm not even counting Tumblr ficlets, oh god, don't make me

Top 5 Pairings

💚🖤Jack/Darby (24) (NUMBER ONE???? how tho)

🧡🖤Hook/Danhausen (23)

💚🧡Jack/Hook (5)

🔮🍑Julia/Anna (4)

🧡🎤Max Caster/Hook (3) & 🧡🍊Orange/Hook (3) (HAHAHAHAHA)

Top 5 by kudos

i found love where it wasn't supposed to be (right in front of me) [Hookhausen]

man of lesser words [Hookhausen]

don't need a cure for love [Orange/Hook]

baby please (would you read my eulogy) [JungleCorpse]

you're the realest thing i've never had to fake [Hookhausen]

Top 5 by hits

baby please (would you read my eulogy) [JungleCorpse]

i found love where it wasn't supposed to be (right in front of me) [Hookhausen]

now you know how i feel [Hookhausen]

Weekend in Fresno: or, a Hook choose your own dating adventure [Hook/everyone]

threat level: euclid [HH, JC, SP]

Fandom Events in 2023

I made it to a wrestling show! Since they never go near me and my life is what it is, I really can't manage more than one a year, and I've got to be lucky to get that to work, but this was a big deal and I'm so happy that I could make it happen!

ALSO I MADE UP A FUCKING PAIRING AND GOT IT TO THE #1 FOR BOTH PARTIES INVOLVED you know what this counts as an event LMAOOOOO i'm thinking no one should actually have this power

Upcoming Projects

If I ever stop bemoaning my perceived lack of skill, I've got 2/3 of a fic that Vamp prompted dialogue for, largely me writing something fluffy and saccharine because she was trying to write smut and we were both trying to write out of our wheelhouses lol

Writing reflection

Well! 2023 was quite a year, honestly. I was going to be like OH HOLY SHIT about my word count but when I took our collabs, it dropped so fast, so that's good, I guess (???). I'm still so happy I discovered wrestling, because it's been easily 12 years since I had this amount of creativity for a single fandom. And this year I really stretched out and started writing new stuff within the wrestling fandom! That's exciting (depending what you followed me for, I suppose LOL).

But more than anything else, this year I looked at what I wanted to write and said, FUCK IT, I'M WRITING IT. And I started dropping horror shit I fully expected that no one would read, because I didn't think people came to fandom for spooky stuff??? And lo and behold, y'all really showed up for those fics! I'm forever grateful you saw me writing absolutely batshit horror and were like yes, Katy, we will also read this creepfest. So much love.

I also tried to write more smut, which I am not particularly adept at, and also some darker themes. I do try to write lighthearted things, haha, but my own mental state has been not stellar, and I think that tends to come out in my fics. And I started writing femslash, which this fandom needs so much more of! So. All in all, a real banger year for me in fandom. I'm pretty proud of a LOT of the fics I wrote this year.

And, obviously, 2023 would not be complete with me mentioning that Vamp and I produced an epic shit ton of words together, and MORE IMPORTANTLY had an absolute blast in doing so. What a whirlwind writing together has been!!! I think we've really gotten to this point of just great flow, and I'm super proud of how we work so well like we do. We DO HAVE SOMETHING ELSE COMING but we've been "planning" it since August and haven't written it yet, so HAHAHA. Anyway. Expect that in 2025, or something. ;)

Rules: Feel free to show whatever stats you have. Only want to show Ao3 stats? Rock on. Want to include some quantitative info instead of stats? Please do this. Want to change how yours is presented? Absolutely do that. Would rather eat glass than do this? Please do eat glass, I’ve heard it’s good for your gums.

Tagging: @whysamwhy123 @meeplanguage @fille-lioncelle and anyone else who wants to take a stab at this!

[cursedvibes]

Do you have a favorite media like anime/manga, tv series/movies, books, video games, etc (if you feel like listing multiple) of all time? Why you love them?

Well, it's pretty tough to pick a fave of all time. (I ended up with 6.5 picks in this case) It varies a lot in my case and it's pretty hard for me to pin down something that I not only like, but liked for a while and will probably keep liking for the foreseeable future. My first thoughts were Naruto or JJK, but in case of Naruto, it is the series I have been a fan of for the longest time, but I wouldn't say I like the story overall much anymore, I'm mostly just obsessed with the Sannin. In case of JJK, I absolutely enjoy writing theories about it and fanfics and to pick apart character dynamics, but I'm not sure how long it will stay with me once it's over.

Thinking about it, I think I'd put it tentatively on the Fave Of All Time list because I could see myself keep coming back to JJK for Kenjaku, Yuuji and Tengen same way I do with the Sannin in Naruto, but I like the story overall more.

A way easier pick for me is Warhammer 40k, primarily the novels and audio dramas. It's just such a rich universe with so many stories you can explore there and authors keep putting out incredible material. There's always something new to find, no matter if comedy or thriller or horror or a mix of all of that and a lot of what I've read will keep haunting me for a long time. I can read hundreds of stories (theoretically, practically there unfortunately exist that many) about the Adeptus Mechanicus and never get tired because that faction just perfectly scratches that horrific sci-fi genderfuck itch in my brain. Definitely a Fave Of All Time.

I think another one would be the American Horror Story franchise. I haven't kept up with it past 1984 and I don't like every single season, but the ones I really like always have something I want to keep coming back to. Not a masterpiece, but a good mix of pulp, horror and interesting concepts that I just can't let go. Pretty much every season, except Freak Show I think, I watched in one day because it always managed to hook me somehow. The opening also used to really freak me out in the beginning, when I started getting into the first season. My favourite seasons are Coven and Apocalypse and they are just something I could watch at any time. I mean, Coven is worth watching for Angela Bassett alone, everything surrounding her only makes it even better. Apocalypse is a controversial pick and I don't like the ending either, but honestly, the way they characterize the Antichrist makes up for it. Reminds me a lot of The Omen II, but more developed. I like the thought that the Antichrist is just a boy with special powers, but who isn't inherently evil, the outside world eventually just pushes him to be. And I think for the most part they did a good job with it. Not all seasons hit for me, but this is definitely something I keep coming back to.

My other picks would all be manga. First one being Urasawa Naoki's Monster. In this case, the anime works just as well because I think some scenes even work better there than in the manga. Johan is one of the few animanga villains that actually gives me chills and the fairy tales in it haunt me to this day. I've actually travelled in the past and visited all the places depicted in the story, just to see how it looks in real life (pretty close to the manga although some places are made up). So far my favourite Urasawa story and I keep rewatching some scenes like JohAnna sending the boy into the red light district quite often because even on their own they are just that good.

Next one is Dorohedoro. I like Hayashida Q's whole style in general. It's messy, gorey, dirty and punk and Dorohedoro shows it best. The mix of silly antics, gore and actual horror is so good and she manages to balance it throughout the story really well. It's one of the few stories where I pretty much like every character. The worldbuilding is fantastic and while it starts out pretty whimsical, the high point of it had me on the edge of my seat. I'm really excited for the new anime season coming out and I'm curious if they will change up their style in any way. I like the style of the anime on its own for the most part, especially the backgrounds look really good, but I think if you don't use hand-drawn frames, it will be very difficult to adapt Hayashida's style and give you that same grunge feeling. There's an extra for the first season that's not made 3D and it looks so much better. The music has always been on point though and the opening and endings as well, so those will be definitely the highlights I'm looking for. Also, great to have more people experience the insanity of Dorohedoro because we're getting to the point now where the story really picks up.

Lastly, there are Houseki no Kuni and Fool Night. Both something I only recently started reading, but they both qualify as those types of stories that just keep blowing your mind. I mean, Phos' character development alone could make me rant for hours. I'm gonna reread hnk at some point from the beginning because I'm pretty sure there are a lot of little hints I missed on my first read and I'm already looking forward to that. The fact that I can reread this story multiple times and take something new out of it each time already makes it qualify for the list. Together with the artstyle it has something ethereal to it and that feeling while reading is another reason I like it so much.

Fool Night is quite similar, except a lot more depressing. Despite that, it isn't a constant downer though. You keep being confronted with problems and injustices quite similar to our world and it only gets worse the deeper you dig, but the characters nonetheless keep up an attitude that change however miniscule is possible and that makes you push on. The artstyle also works perfectly to enhance the atmosphere of the story. The lines can be quite shaky, but with a lot of detail and that makes the whole world in Fool Night feel uneven and distressed, but also incredible tactile and natural like the plants growing everywhere. It just started and there aren't that many chapters in English yet, but it's quite rare that I encounter a story where every single chapter manages to move me, even if it's just by revealing a little bit more about the world building. Honestly, can't recommend it enough.

[beaft]

recommend some horror?

aha!! i am glad you asked (no really, i am, thank you for giving me the opportunity to be loud about my favourite genre). here is a non-exhaustive list of some of my personal favourites:

books

-the ballad of black tom by victor lavalle (retelling of lovecraft's "the horror at red hook" by a black author, i could talk about this one for hours suffice to say it's Very Good)

-pet semetary by stephen king (i have a love/hate relationship with mr king but i think this is one of his better books)

-the haunting of hill house by shirley jackson (actually, just about anything by shirley jackson, my personal favourite book by her is "we have always lived in the castle")

-beloved by toni morrison (it's not exactly horror, but i have to put it here anyway because it's too good not to)

-things we say in the dark by kirsty logan

-tell me i’m worthless by alison rumfitt

-house of leaves by mark z. danielewski (i detest this book. yes it's still one of my top favourites and no i will not be taking questions at this time.)

-my heart is a chainsaw by stephen graham jones

-literally anything by robert aickman

movies

-pan’s labyrinth (historical fantasy-horror, visually stunning, one of my favourite movies of all time)

-lake mungo (australian found footage horror about ghosts and grief)

-the texas chain saw massacre (not as gory as the title might suggest)

-the wicker man (the original version, unless you’re in the mood to see nicolas cage at his nicolas cagiest)

-jacob’s ladder (beautiful, eerie, hallucinogenic, you will not know what’s going on for most of it and that’s honestly kind of the point)

-carrie (the sissy spacek version NOT the one with chloe moretz)

-the ritual (it's not a perfect movie but the creature design is WONDERFUL)

-alien (grr! i'm gonna getcha! i'm the alien! and so on)

-nosferatu (both versions are excellent, but i am particularly partial to the 1979 one with klaus kinski as the vampire)

-whistle and i’ll come to you (unsettling short film based on an m. r. james story)

-hereditary (this one's best if you go in blind, but i realise that’s probably difficult since a lot of it has been memed to hell and back)

-the thing (sci-fi thriller/body horror movie set on an isolated arctic research base)

-don't look now (based on a daphne du maurier short story; light on the horror but heavy on the uncanny)

-cabin in the woods (comedy-horror) okay this one is kind of a guilty pleasure for me but it does have some clever moments and it’s genuinely very fun to watch

-silent hill 2006 (another guilty pleasure, it is very much not a good movie but also i've seen it like 7 times, so.)

-ginger snaps (the close relationship between a pair of misfit sisters is tested when one of them starts going through puberty, and also incidentally becomes a werewolf. similar vibes to jennifer's body although i personally prefer this one)

-penda’s fen (startlingly ahead of its time – it’s basically a coming-of-age story about a gay teenager in rural england with a tasty slice of religious/folk horror)

-crimson peak (love letter to the "gothic melodrama" genre)

-us (i personally preferred it to get out, but they’re both amazing; i haven’t seen NOPE yet but i hope to soon!)

tv shows

-castlevania (based on the video game, vampires + religious horror, gorgeously animated, unexpectedly funny)

-the terror (true-ish story of a doomed voyage to the north-west passage) (the demon bear may or may not be historically factual) (we just don't know)

-twin peaks (idk if it counts as horror but i’m putting it here anyway. it’s not for everyone but it occupies a special place in my heart)

-in the flesh (again, not quite horror, but there are horror elements, and i am putting it here because it’s both a pleasingly original take on the zombie-apocalypse genre and a beautiful queer love story. it got cancelled halfway through its run and i will never stop being salty about it.)

-the enfield haunting (three-part tv drama) (much better than the james wan movie) (not that that’s hard)

podcasts

-the magnus archives (do not ask me about this show unless you're prepared to hear me yell about it for Ever and Ever and Ever)

-alice isn't dead (lesbian trucker searches for her missing wife amidst various spooky happenings)

-a scottish podcast (washed-up radio DJ decides to become a phony paranormal investigator to make some extra cash, but his scheme goes awry when he stumbles on a genuine paranormal event)

-i am in eskew (man attempts to leave city, is unsuccessful)

message me if you want trigger warnings or a more detailed description for any of these!

[ohmeadows]

ooh for the ask game: 5 and 12 (for your ruanliu fic? i just love this fic so damn much, i need to know everything about it)

What fic surprised you with how much interaction it got this past year?

unsurprisingly, i was not at all prepared for the amount of interaction you and me are a twisted fantasy got, for better or worse. i wrote it for two people in about 48hrs and didn't think much else of it at the time. the tag enemies to milkies, added as a silly little joke, took on a life of its own for a while there.

(apparently i also wrote most of it while in the university library? just right there in public? ok.)

i got a lot of nice dms, some really icky ones, some people behaved really weirdly around me for quite some time, it wasn't the best introduction to a fandom but i went thru it and now i'm just writing what interests me. i haven't re-read it once since i posted it, so readers probably know it better than i do by now.

What inspired the dew of dying stars?

lots of little things, amongst them a throwaway thought at the end of september of "two frosty women mmm kiss". that was it. and then i wanted to know, well, how could i make that work? under what circumstances could their paths cross? it wasn't as hard as i thought it'd be. ruan mei's writing in simuni was honestly stellar, precise and interesting: did you know she has a manual for dealing with people? that was probably the first hook: what would jingliu had given to have a manual for how to connect with and live with others? with baiheng?

a common theory before ruan mei's full lore was revealed was that she was from the xianzhou cangcheng due to her association with plum blossoms and xianzhou-like style; and though her lore hints at another planet I still like to think she at the very least spent some formative time there. this also served as an exploration point of shared trauma, what it did to them, what those plum blossoms growing out of jingliu means to them both... though now that we know ruan mei nurtured a planet it'd be interesting to see someone do ruanliu au where ruan mei reveals she nurtured the planet that devoured the cangcheng.

ever since reading jeff vandermeer's 2014 novel Annihilation (and later, watching the alex garland movie version) i have been obsessed with the potential of floral and plant body horror, but struggling to find an outlet for those ideas. instead, i let them fester for years until hsr introduced mara: an entire civilization blessed/cursed with the looming disaster of what awaits them as they grow older. delicious.

during the fall of 2023, some friends were reading a lover's discourse: fragments by barthes and sharing quotes and reflections on the daily, which informed the inclusion of baiheng's presence; I find it nigh impossible to write about jingliu without at least brushing against baiheng and the wound she represents in jingliu's psyche.

these two points served as the strongest sources of inspiration, while for ruan mei, i ended up doing a lot of research into plant biology and systematics, as well as slowly and patiently layering an extrapolation who she was from simuni lore available to us at the time. in the end, i only had to do minimal edits as her lore was revealed, which is honestly a credit to hsr's thorough writing in simuni. i spent a lot of weekends in the library flipping through plant books to gather vocabulary and further extrapolate on it.

[jophiel-shakes]

Hello !! I really liked your roommate headcanons with Freddy! Super tasty! Could you do the same with Sun and Moon?

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note :: living with Sun & Moon. The post anon was talking about

warning :: none

reader pronouns :: none mentioned

relationship :: romantic can also be read as pining/platonic

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Sun

Similar to Freddy, he’s all about keep the house clean- sometimes. He’s both very messy and clean. It’s strange.

He cleans up after you, no worries, but often leaves disorganisation wherever he goes. The spare room you offered to him (which he barely uses, deciding to hang in your room majority of the time) can sometimes be scattered and in disarray.

So you two often split cleaning, he cleans up your messes and you clean up his.

He reserves one day a week for whole house cleaning; that means washing, drying, folding, vacuuming, dusting, all that.

He feels it’s the best way to show his gratitude to you for re-homing him and caring for him.

Whenever you’re away, Sun will busy himself (or at least try) with painting or colouring.

He’s a lovely roomy, always close by and keeping you company (which may become annoying, but he knows when to back off once you tell him).

He pushes communication quite a lot, asking you “Whatcha thinking ‘bout?” Or “Tell me all about your day!” and generally trying to pick at your brain.

Video games! It’s one of his favourite activities to do with you wether it’s watching you play, or him playing beside you he loves it. Wholesome games such as animal crossing, Mario party and Mario Kart are his favourites to play with you.

The two three of you actually have separate Netflix profiles; his is ‘Sun!! :D’ with the yellow smile icon, Moon’s is just ‘Moon Netflix’ with the blue smile icon. Original.

Sun looovesss to watch comedy, sitcoms, romance, fantasy and drama. He always finds himself getting invested in characters and the storylines, so much that he can get emotional when something had happens.

He likes to cook for you! He was never a food handler in the daycare (other than the provided candies) so cooking is new to him, and he likes to explore different meals with you. Sometimes he’ll provide you with some ingredients to buy when you go grocery shopping. Although his food may not be the best because he can’t taste, he’s gotten pretty good at making eggs and bacon!

Since Sun got access to the internet, the house has gotten colourful with cheap decorations. Especially his room.

Even though Sun’s never in his room for too long, he managed to make it look just like the daycare. Posters, drawn pictures, sun and moon accessories. It was very homely… something of a safe space for him.

Sometimes Sun will grieve the home he’s lost in his room. Children on TV or kids playing outside will trigger sadness and melancholy, you try to be there for him but sometimes it’s best to leave him be.

To make him feel better, you try to find memorabilia of the pizzaplex and daycare online, to help him feel more at home. Doll’s also help a little, it’s like he has a child to pretend with.

Moon

Moon likes to think he runs the place, but he really doesn’t. He only acts as a bossy alarm clock.

No more all nighters, late nights and heaven forbid any parties that kept you till the early morning.

Occasionally, Moon might let you off the hook but only if you have the next day off so you can sleep in.

The first few nights he stayed, you could tell he was a little uncomfortable with the new, much smaller space. So you tried to warm him up with familiar activities- kind of like a sleepover!

Think makeovers, truth or dare, karaoke, fort making (he enjoyed that one the most).

Unsurprisingly, Moon likes to watch everything Sun doesn’t. Psychological horror, thriller, sci-fi. He’s not particularly fond of gore or jumpscares, he only loves the genres because of your squeamish reactions. He finds it’s a great bonding experience to watch scary films with you.

He does avoid horror films that freak you out too much, ones that keep you up. There’s a fine line between nightmare fuel and basic horror, so he always chooses the movie to keep everything balanced. You don’t have much of a choice anyway, he always steals the remote.

Moon actually enjoys documentaries! He will often watch them while you sleep or if you take the night out.

He never uses the spare bedroom to sleep.. if that’s even what he does. From sunset onwards he’s looming over you, clingy yet distant.

The first night, he followed you into your room and stare, you ended up inviting him to sleep with you but only for the night (which ended up being every night).

Eventually, he wouldn’t need an invite and he would crawl into bed after you.

Once again, he had to warm up to this but as your trust continued to grow, you found he was much happier to show affection.

Moon actually quite enjoyed cuddling you. When he worked in the pizzaplex affection could never be shown to a child for jealously reasons. Although he missed the children, he enjoyed focusing all his attention onto you.

Nevertheless, you find his hugs are still hesitant and that you need to guide his hands into a tighter cuddle. Hopefully with each day he becomes more accustomed to everything.

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 18/03/2024

Awesome Taxi

Season 4 Episode 2 Featured on: DJ Professor K Presents: 24​/​7 FUNKY FRESH BEATS FROM TOKYO​-​TO

Ripped by Mcsplosion

Requested by KnightOfGames! (Request Form)

I've talked a lot recently, in posts like ULTRA S+G and Haltmanna feat. Rob Thomas of Matchbox 20, about the excitement that pertained to Season 2 of SiIvaGunner in particular. But I want to make something very clear: just because that was my favorite period of the channel's life, it does not mean that I believe its the ideal model for the channel to follow. If there was anything that the Reboot taught me, it was that SiIvaGunner should NEVER try to conform to the wishes of its audience - and its that defiant, radical spirit that has kept the channel's evolution as diverse as it's been over its past seven seasons. The main reason I'm even able to refer back to Seasons in such a concrete way is because each one has a completely different vibe and energy from the last; no other Season tries to be quite like Season 2, but that just means that they're able to be incredible in their own ways.

What I'm building up to with all of this is, is that it's absurdly impressive that rips like Awesome Taxi was able to make me just as excited as the best parts of Season 2 did.

After an entire year's worth of buildup and the channel's biggest-ever event, DJ Professor K was crowned the winner of the King for Another Day Tournament. We all had our favorite contestants going in, and I'm sure many of us found new favorites even as the tournament was going on with stuff like MissingNo.'s Unhealed, but in the end it was easy to see just why DJ Professor K reigned supreme. September, Fall Breaks, Thank You, Everybody! - Hideki Naganuma's funk was infectious, and the promise of an entire day's worth of songs from other classic SEGA games, such as what we'd get with 88811, was positively mouth-watering. The eventual reveal that the day of celebration would be held with a day-long livestream of almost entirely new rips for its entire run was incredible on its own, but more than that, it felt as if the tournament had rejuvenated my excitement for the channel - I had finally accepted that, even if this wasn't anywhere near the channel's main story, SiIva had found a new way to get me invested me again. And getting to see all of it unfold live was just one more way of reminding me of just how much of a proper COMMUNITY SiIvaGunner is, despite how one-sided the viewing experience often felt for me back then.

The excitement of the livestream, much like my recent excitement over MAGFest 2024's live performances of rips like Sable's Stickerbush, really just hooked me. And for as lovely as it was to experience genuine DJ Professor K bangers through the event, to flood the livestream chat with excitement and grooving along with everyone else, it was the other end of the spectrum that truly got me - the GOOFY shit. My post on AIN'T NOTHIN' LIKE A CHUNKY BEAT delved into this already back in July, but there truly is nothing like seeing an entire chat get lit ablaze by the horror in realizing what the joke in rips like this is - to realize, in this case, that this is a full-on *Fanboy and Chum-Chum* cover of the legendary Crazy Taxi theme, The Offspring's All I Want. From just the intro and instrumentation, one may initially expect a sentence-mixed demon akin to DK Rap God, yet what Awesome Taxi may well be more horrifying. An ORIGINAL vocal performance by Mcsplosion himself, somehow sounding exactly like the Fanboy & Chum-Chum characters in most parts of the song, whilst also sounding uncannily unlike them in just enough parts to only add to the experience than detract. Althewhile the instrumentation hums away in a sound exactly like that of the Fanboy & Chum-Chum intro theme, sticking to the All I Want melody, somehow befitting it near perfectly.

Honestly, I have no clue why Fanboy & Chum-Chum re-entered the public consciousness during early 2020, but it coinciding with Season 4 Episode 2 in particular almost felt like fate. The excitement over the first Summer Festival was truly at that level of childlike giddiness that Fanboy & Chum-Chum themselves portray, and no matter how much we want to call it "cursed" or "cringe"...sorry, but Awesome Taxi is a banger! The amount of effort that Mcsplosion did not go to waste, both in making the punchline hit harder, but also in making sure that the rip would stay incredibly re-listenable after the fact.

Because really, SiIvaGunner is all about commitment to the bit - no matter how much that bit changes with the times.

[optiwashere]

Get to know you tag game thing

I was tagged by @amorficzna! I love these things.

Three ships: I mean, I do have to say Shadowheart/OC (BG3) for my first, right? Obviously, I love my Shadowheart/Asheera but I really enjoy reading so many folks' different OCs with her. And since I had a Pathfinder moment earlier today, Anevia/Irabeth (Wrath of the Righteous) is big HNNNG material. And to give you a nice left hook/blast from the past, April/Ann (Parks and Recreation).

First ever ship: I actually don't remember, so I'm going to answer to the best of my eternally fading memory. I need you all to bear with me here. I used to watch a lot of Degrassi: The Next Generation as a kid because of the Fuse and Noggin channels, so I think it was Paige/Alex. Either that or the disaster of Ellie/Craig, but I remember my feelings about Paige/Alex quite vividly.

Last song: Swollen by Jack Off Jill

Last movie: Rewatched Pontypool for the 112th time. My favorite quirky horror movie about semiotics and memetic language.

Currently reading: Blood Bride by @raedmagdon but I am so fucking far behind it's embarrassing. Currently rereading the Liveship Traders by Robin Hobb because I need her voice in my mind as inspiration again, and I'm also stalled out on the first book because Life.

Currently watching: I rarely watch TV... Last thing I really watched was Succession. Before that was, uh, I genuinely don't know.

Currently consuming: Store brand Goldfish crackers, but they're lil turtles! What a breakfast.

Currently craving: Good sleep for the first time in nearly 4 years.

I'll tag @siyurikspakvariisis @apoptotique @underworldobsessed @bottombatch @quitefair if they wanna do it!

[popcultureoverdosed]

The Curse of Saki Sanobashi

I'm writing this journal entry to document my experience with a certain film. I'm probably already dead if anyone is reading this, but please read on. I hate Saki Sanobashi and what it has done to my life. Most importantly, I hate the depraved bastards who made it.

Until recently, I've been an average college girl with only one notable quality: I love searching for lost media. Most people get a thrill from watching a good horror movie and I'm no different with lost media. There's just something about the elusive nature of it that makes the hunt so fascinating. There's a countless amount of entertainment that vanishes from the public eye for whatever reason and many remain completely forgotten. That never sat well with me. Maybe it's the history buff in me, but I believe every form of content should be preserved. It's scary to think that something that brings you joy could one day be forever lost to time.

Saki Sanobashi is a name that's been plaguing me for the last few years now. Every lost media enthusiast worth their salt has at least heard of it if they haven't already joined the hunt. I'm one of the several archivists who plunged headfirst into this monstrosity of a goose chase. I, like many others, got hooked on its tragic premise of a bunch of schoolgirls trapped in a bathroom where death is the only way out. The morbid curiosity in all of us compelled us to search high and low for this elusive anime.

That was years ago.

Now? Saki remains a distant memory in the minds of once optimistic researchers. Dead end after dead end had led to the entire thing being labeled as some elaborate hoax. Even I began losing faith in the search despite all the time I invested in it. It was disheartening knowing that one of the most fascinating lost media searches of all time could be fake. I would've quit entirely had it not been for that one fateful afternoon.

It was a typically brutal winter in Toronto which meant that a snowstorm would be picking up before the day was over. I thought it best to go to my favorite comic and stock up on my favorite books before the storm trapped me at home with my girlfriend. Marque Noir was different from other comic shops in that there exists a secret section of the store only a select few know about. Because I've been a loyal customer for a few years, the owner trusted in showing me the back room. I was hesitant at first to enter a secluded room alone with a man due to being a woman, but I figured he wouldn't try anything with customers still in the store.

What I saw in that room was the stuff of wonder. Several shelves were stocked with underground comics so obscure even the most hardcore archivists probably didn't know about them. The type of comics you can't even find on the internet. It was heaven on earth for a lost media obsessed girl like me. The original post mentioned Saki being an anime, but I was desperate for any type of media out there. What's fascinating is that there were also movies stocked with the comics. The cover art on each DVD case was incredibly low quality, to the point that I assumed the store owner hand-made them himself. There were no ISBNs or distributor info anywhere to be found so my theory seemed fairly likely all things considered.

I filled my bag with as many items as I could afford( which isn't a lot for a broke college student)  and excitedly swiped my card at the counter. The store owner gave me the weirdest of grins as I made my purchase. He seemed amused but almost in a mocking sort of way. He hardly ever emotes in the first place so that smile really caught me off guard.

I left the store and boarded the closest train to drop me off at the dorms. Though Halloween comes in the autumn, I feel like winter is the most ideal season to indulge in horror. The cold weather is like a reflection of the spine chilling fear I get whenever I read a good comic. I stepped inside my dorm room and immediately began browsing through my latest collection. They all looked so good I didn't know where to begin. As I rummaged through the pile of DVDs, I noticed something that threw me for a loop.

One DVD case was completely blank. The cover was pitch black and so was the back. There wasn't even anything on the spine. I couldn't imagine myself buying something like this so how it ended up with me was a mystery. Still, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't the least bit intrigued by it. There could've been literally anything on that disc and the only way to find out was to start the movie.

I waited for my girlfriend to return from campus before starting the movie. Emily's a cute brunette, but she has zero tolerance for horror. She always shrieks her head off whenever I play my movies in the living room. All that blood and gore drives her crazy. She greeted me with a kiss on the lips and then paused when she saw the devious smirk on my face. She already knew what I had in store for her. Emily, of course, protested but I pleaded with her to watch the movie with me. Seeing her scream like a child over on screen murder was sometimes more enjoyable than the movie itself. She remained firm in her stance against it but eventually broke down after enough of my begging. It feels good having things my way.

I quickly inserted the DVD into an old game station and stared at the screen with anticipation for what was about to start.  After several seconds of a blank screen, some Japanese text appeared with an English subtitle that read " Requiem of the lost girls." The title naturally left me curious so I watched on with excitement.

The scene then faded back to black and what I saw after that made my blood freeze solid.

Three schoolgirls in a bathroom.

All of them had miserable looks of utter despair.

The scene was unmistakable. It was a scenario I ran over in my head countless times. It was Saki Sanobashi, the anime searched years for! Having the legendary film before me after all this time was almost too good to be true. And to think it came from my favorite comic shop. I've been shopping for years now and never even had a hint something like Saki would be there.

Emily was confused as to why I was so excited so I told her we just discovered the holy grail of lost media. The gravity of the situation was unsurprisingly lost on her but she smiled anyway for my sake. We watched the movie unfold just like the legend went. The girls remained trapped in the bathroom and lamented their misfortune all the while. As the film progressed, the agony in their expressions became increasingly visceral. Their eyes looked so hollow, their skin was so pale. Emily clutched into my hand with a hint of anxiety in her eyes.

The tone of the video was much more somber than I expected. Seeing the girls take turns telling the others about their hopes and dreams, trying desperately to alleviate their situation, felt oddly melancholic. I was growing attached to these characters to the point I hoped they'd find a way despite that going against the lore. We eventually reached the part where the girls realized there truly was no way out of their situation...except for death.

Their deaths were just as horrid as I expected them to be. One girl goaded one of the others into drowning her in the sink and another clawed at her own neck with visceral detail. The most painful part of it all was the bloodcurdling scream the last girl emitted as she bashed her head against the wall. It was far more realistic than it had any right to be.

Despite all the fear, my heart raced with excitement. I had to write a blog post to let everyone know about my discovery! The internet would go wild once I told them the good news. I quickly went to my Tumblr to start writing, but the site wouldn't load. I tried other social media sites but nothing was working.

I tried stepping outside in the hall to get better reception but the door wouldn't budge. The knob didn't move at all no matter how hard I pulled. My girlfriend and I were both freaking out at this point. We tried opening windows, calling 911, and banging on doors, all of which were in vain. We were somehow completely severed from the outside world. I wondered how the hell was any of this possible when the image of the movie flashed into my mind.

We were trapped just like the girls in Saki Sanobashi. Was the film cursed? That seemed to be the only explanation. I should've trusted my gut instincts and never let that guy lead me to the backroom. I knew there was something off about him and now I fell into his trap. So far we've spent two weeks in this hellhole of an apartment. Food has long since run out and any sense of hope is dead. It pains me to see Emily's body as pale as winter, her eyes devoid of life. Neither of us can last much longer. I'm writing this document as a warning to anyone searching for Saki Sanobashi.

Stay the hell away from it. It is a cursed film that dooms its viewers the suffer the same fate as the girls in the bathroom. I imagine the curse will be lifted once we die and our belongings will be collected by our loved ones. Hopefully, they will see this document and spread the news. Or maybe they'll brush this off as the crazed rantings of a lunatic.

I honestly don't know anymore. All I can say is to stay safe and never attempt to watch this damned movie.