#and find a community that discusses the genres you enjoy

[wlwvampirism]

People need to learn the difference between actual criticsm of the book community and something that is just personally annoying to them.

Some person: Hyper-consumerism and the overconsumption of books is objectively bad

Me: I agree, and while there's nothing wrong with owning books, I think people should be more mindful over how ma--

Some person: Also, I'm sick of people only sticking to the genre they like! How dare they read something they enjoy! It's not like they're reading as a hobby. They should use trash YA novels as a starting point and then move on to actual good literature because they're not gaining anything meaningful from reading YA

Me: You've lost me

[writerblue275]

Heartsteel love language headcanon (Giving and Receiving)

Inspiration: I was thinking about this because we were discussing the idea in the book club I’m a part of. So I thought about me and that led me to think about what Heartsteel’s love languages would be!

Champions: Heartsteel

Genre: Headcanon

Type: FLUFF

Gender: Gender Neutral Reader!

TW: None!

Aphelios

Giving: Words of Affirmation

Now some of you might be giving me side-eye, but hear me out. This is both verbal and non-verbal.

We know he canonically can speak, just not loudly and he doesn’t talk super often. Now I still believe he’d primarily communicate in a way that’s non-verbal, such as sign language, in order to not overwork his vocal cords.

Because of this, anytime Aphelios speaks, you want to fucking listen to him. When he says something, you know it’s something important. He doesn’t waste his voice on just anything. It’s too precious for that.

But lucky you, he never finds talking to you a waste. He loves using what voice he does have to give you all the lovely affirmations/compliments you could ever ask for. He will make sure his love for you is known.

And he doesn’t have to use his voice either. You will absolutely get random texts throughout the day, or find sweet little notes in your pocket/bag. Any card you receive as part of a gift or something just has such sweet words written in it. I can also see Phel leaving notes on your mirror (either in dry erase or on a post-it) to make you smile.

The biggest hype man when you meet your goals/achieve something you’ve been working hard towards. And he’s genuinely excited about it too. He’s really so happy for and proud of you and he makes sure you’re aware of that. Phel always just wants to make you smile and let you know, despite his busy and bizzare schedule, he loves you very much and you’re extremely important to him.

Receiving: Quality time

Aphelios loves when you and him have some alone time together. In the hustle and bustle of being a member of an extremely popular group, his mind can get really chaotic. But then he sees you and it’s like a switch gets flipped.

You calm him down like no one else can. You don’t even have to do or say anything specifically. Phel is a big fan of companionable silence (big same, my guy) and of “being alone together” with you (if that makes sense.) Though of course he is also a big fan of you cuddling him and chatting about whatever.

Sometimes you’ll bring work over to his studio and work on that while he’s writing/recording his compositions. You always make sure to bring snacks/meals and caffeine for him and he always stops to enjoy the food with you and listen as you talk about your day. You’re one of the few people who can easily pull him away from work no matter what.

When both of you get back to work, you may barely say a word to each other, but it doesn’t matter at all.

He’s more productive when you’re with him in his studio and he also takes better care of himself. You’ve received texts from Alune and calls from Yone asking you to just move into his studio permanently. (Of course they’re joking, but they do love the positive influence you have on Aphelios, his music, and his well-being.)

He just loves being in your presence, knowing you could be anywhere in the world if you wanted to be, but here you are, with him, loving him. It makes his heart really happy and light.

Ezreal

Giving: Physical Touch

I feel this is one of the more obvious ones, but Heartsteel Ezreal just gives off the vibes of someone who is very physically affectionate.

That’s not a bad thing. He’s just absolutely the type to come up behind you and give you a hug and nuzzle your neck. This won’t be any surprise though. His love of physical affection is demonstrated early on in your relationship through linked pinkies or a hand always on you in some way.

Dare I say, clingy (in a good way though). He just loves touching you. Doesn’t matter if he’s working, he can get creative. Like he’s absolutely flashed in front of you during a concert to give you a wink and get a high-five. Ezreal loves how pink your cheeks get and how wide you smile at him. (Ideally he’d love to give you more attention but he knows Alune and Yone would kill him if he got too extra.)

You’ve received post-show texts from Kayn that say something along the lines of: “For fuck’s sake, (Y/N), can you please get back here already so your puppy can finally give you the “proper amount of attention” he’s spent the past 15 minutes rambling about? I’m about to tape his mouth shut so I don’t vomit.” (He’s 95% joking. All of Heartsteel loves how happy you make Ezreal, but they can only handle so much post-show adrenaline-filled gushing.)

Him having that physical connection with you is his primary way of letting you know he’s there for you and that you’re important to him. When you’re with him, the two of you are always touching some way some how. As I said, some of his favs are linked hands/fingers. He also loves having his arm(s) around you or his head on your shoulder/lap.

It really doesn’t matter though. All that matters is that he feels you next to him.

Receiving: Words of Affirmation

I feel like Ez is the type of guy who definitely wants to hear you say you love him as often as possible. He will never get tired of hearing you say those words to him.

I do think some of this stems from his past. Having spent time in the public eye for such a long time, and unfortunately being heavily critiqued after he failed to follow up his first solo hit with success, that’s made him doubt himself and his abilities at times.

Imposter syndrome can really be a bitch (I know it well). Unfortunately, it’s made moments in his life difficult, especially since this original scrutiny happened when he was younger, during a critical developmental period for someone growing up. (Ezreal is only in his like early-early mid twenties, y’all. Shit happening during/before that can really leave an impact.)

Hearing you say how proud you are of him, or even if you just compliment him on something small (like the watch he chose to wear for the day or how good his hair looks), well that means everything to him.

You love how his face lights up whenever you compliment him or tell him something sweet. His adorable crooked smile is like concentrated sunshine.

One of your favorite things to do is leave sticky notes on his mirror that just say sweet things like “I love you, Ez!” Or “Looking good, handsome!” He always makes sure to take a selfie with each post it note when you do because he loves seeing them as much as you love putting them up there. It’s your favorite part of the day, getting your daily selfie from him with your note in it.

One time Alune told you the story of how Ezreal turned into a fountain of tears and wouldn’t stop talking about how much he loved you when you had flowers and a really sappy note (detailing how much you love him, how proud you are of him, how you’ve always believed in him/his talent, and thanking him for allowing you the honor to be by his side and support him through this amazing journey) delivered to him before Heartsteel’s first concert. He has the original card framed and he takes a copy of the note with him when he goes on trips. He reads your words before every single performance as part of his pre-show ritual.

Kayn

Giving: Physical Touch (TBH I feel like touch is just very slightly over words of affirmation for Kayn. At least for giving.)

You know what, I think Kayn is similar to Ez a little bit. Just another member who I can see being physically affectionate with his partner.

HOWEVER, I think how Kayn expresses his physical affection is different than Ezreal. Unlike Ezreal who I see as being very overt with physical affection, I see Kayn as someone who is just slightly more low-key.

Now that’s not to say he’s not going to express that in public. He absolutely will. But with Kayn I see more: hand in your back pocket while you’re in line, hand on your thigh if he drives (he’s figured out that’s the only way you’ll tolerate his driving), arm sliding around your waist whenever he steps next to you, hand slowly slipping into yours.

The sort of touches that leave you blushing and biting your lip. The ones that leave you a little breathless. (Not saying Ez can’t do those. I fully believe he can. But there’s just really something about Kayn’s punk/bad boy energy that has me like…😳 and 😏 at the same time.)

He’s a BIG fan of kissing. Like you cannot convince me otherwise. Like yeah his hands can do some of the talking, but kissing you is his favorite way to show he loves you.

(Lord help me I could do a whole headcanon for Kayn kisses alone, I feel like. I have THOUGHTS.) Anytime you want a kiss, you get a kiss, no questions asked. And the way he kisses you indicates a lot for how he’s feeling.

Sleepy Kayn? Forehead, nose, cheek kisses (shhhhhhh he has a soft side. Don’t tell anyone). Needy Kayn? He’s either kissing you completely breathless or he’s leaving hickeys somewhere on you. Otherwise, even if he’s just walking past you to get to another room, he will always stop to give you a kiss hello. And even those sweet quick kisses hello leave you feeling just LOVELY.

Receiving: Words of Affirmation (again I was between this and physical touch, but unlike giving where physical touch wins, I think receiving, words of affirmation win.)

Again, similar to Ez, I think a lot of this stems from his pre-Heartsteel past. Kayn got kicked out of his old band and got a not-great reputation in the media. Like there’s no denying that sucks and that sort of criticism can really fuck with a person’s mind.

So when you compliment him, you say you’re really proud of him, or when you tell him how great he was after a show, he eats that shit up with a SPOON.

And Kayn might try to play it off as not a big deal, but every time you tell him you love him, you can’t help but notice how happy and content he looks. As if all is right with the world. (Listen this might be a tad cheesy but let this rockstar get some genuine fucking love and praise here please.)

I’ve mentioned before in my pet names headcanon (HERE) that I think some pet names really mean something to Kayn. Like when he calls you sexy (ex: “Hey, sexy, how was work?”) it’s his way of affirming to you that he finds you sexy. Same if he calls you beautiful or hottie or whatever.

So when YOU call HIM those sorts of pet names, it means something to him. He takes it as affirmation you still find him to be sexy/handsome/etc… Also let’s be real, the man put in work to get the body he has. You can feed his ego a bit on this.

Another one who secretly keeps any cards or notes you give him. If he’s ever feeling bad about himself or really nervous and he can’t talk to you, he’ll start reading through his stash and it always helps. Knowing you love him and believe in him really shoves the demons away.

Though let’s be real here, nothing compares to hearing you say sweet things to him in person (or over the phone).

K’Sante

(The number of times I changed my mind on his love languages omfg. We’ll talk a little more about receiving first in this one)

Giving and receiving: Words of affirmation

A lot of this has to do with K’Sante’s pre-Heartsteel backstory, as well as his base-lore character. (I know this is for HS K’Sante, but they kept some traits from his base character [The Pride of Nazumah] that I think really feed into this.)

K’Sante is a very proud man. He’s a very ambitious man. It doesn’t matter whether that pertains to music, to fashion, to design, to fitness, etc. whatever he’s doing, he puts his all into it.

And when you put your all into something, naturally there’s some desire for someone to acknowledge the effort you put in, as well as appreciate the result of all that effort. And while he gets that from the fans, the media, other places, none of that approval means more to him than your approval.

He feels your love whenever you tell him how handsome he looks in the new design he brought to life or text him about a photo in the media and compliment him. Whenever you’re the first one to notice when he’s changed his hair. Whenever you cheer him on as he’s doing reps. Whenever you comment on how amazing his part of their new song is.

Hearing/reading (for texts) your pride in, support for, and love for him allows him to stay ambitious and to keep driving for more and he’s so grateful for you. He definitely realizes outside of HS, you are what helps keep things steady.

And while you are super proud of him, he’s ALSO super proud of you and he’s definitely not afraid to let you know that.

I feel like it’s very difficult to have low self-esteem regarding your looks when you’re with him. K’Sante will compliment you out the wazoo. When you look fine he’s making sure you know you look fine (which to him is always). I also feel like he’d use you as a muse for his designs, which is like a massive compliment.

And if you’re nervous about something, K’Sante is such an excellent hype man. He’s reminding you why you are so amazing and that your personal strengths are perfect to get you through whatever is being thrown at you.

Along the same vein, I feel like K’Sante would be the best person to go to for advice. He seems extremely thoughtful with what he says and I feel like he knows exactly what to say to make you feel better about things. (I mean shit we know other members already go to him for advice, he’d absolutely give you, his partner, advice as well.)

And when you achieve something? He is celebrating as much as if he accomplished it himself. He’s very proud of you. “What did I tell you, baby! I knew you could do it!”

Definitely brags about you and your achievements, at least to Heartsteel. He’s just so fucking proud of you and he can’t keep that to himself! That’s a disservice to you! I feel like he’d at least ask and make sure he could tell other people about your achievement though.

(Hehehe this makes me imagine: You know he’s been bragging about you again because you receive random texts from the other members congratulating you on something you’ve recently accomplished.)

This big guy is just a man who really enjoys telling you he loves you (as well as what he loves about you) and loves to hear you say it back (as well as what you love about him).

Sett

Giving and receiving: Acts of Service

A lot of this stems from being raised by a single mother after his father just up and left (shoutout to the single parents out there. Y’all are incredible). Sett would do anything to try and make Ma’s life easier. We know he’s the best cook of the group and I bet he learned how to cook pretty early on.

I imagine Sett also quickly learned sewing and other household tasks for the same reason. It just hurt him to see his mother so damn tired and stressed after working multiple jobs to try and make ends meet. He wanted to do what he could to help. That desire to make things easier for the people he loves hasn’t gone away as he’s grown up. If anything, it’s gotten stronger. (God damn Ma raised him so well 😭.) He shows this type of love in many different forms, starting with simple ways. He’ll always open the door/car door for you. He’ll walk on the side closer to the street. Always offers an arm to you when going down stairs. He’s happy to carry any bags for you.

Of course Sett just as easily does more in-depth acts of service. Mending clothes you love that you thought couldn’t be fixed. (God I love Sett loving to sew.) Happily teaching you to sew when you ask him. Cooking dinner whenever he can (he loves trying out new things, but even more so, he loves showing you the meals of his childhood). Ma always cooks with lots of love and that’s a quality she passed down to her son. He also loves spoiling you through his actions (think surprise bubble baths/face masks/massages/etc.) just because he wants to and he thinks you deserve to be spoiled.

Sett would literally run through a brick wall if it would make your life easier in the short and long run. You make him so happy. He loves you so much and making sure you’re happy and well taken care of is the least he can do, in his mind.

On the receiving end of things, anything you do for him, whether small or big, Sett appreciates more than you know. Whether it’s bandaging his knuckles after a particularly intense bout with a punching bag or making sure his keys and water bottle are in their proper spot by the door so he doesn’t forget them, these seemingly small things mean the world to him.

And when you do “bigger things” like fix his sewing machine that he hasn’t had time to take to the repairman, or reseason his cast-iron cookware? You’ve got Sett ready to propose on the god damn spot. You organized his spare fabric swatches by color and it was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen (besides you). He would not stop thanking you for the rest of the week.

When you make dinner and prep a plate for him to heat up once he gets home really late from a long day? It doesn’t matter if he’s the better cook, to him, this is the best meal he’s ever tasted. And when you stay awake late and help him into a warm bath/shower? It’s adorable to see your massive and jacked boyfriend turn into putty under your gentle ministrations. He especially loves when you wash his hair and play with his ears.

Along the same vein, he loves when you come greet him after a bout of boxing with his little medical bag. You always look him over carefully, running a quick concussion check, cleaning anything that needs to be cleaned, and wrapping anything that needs to be wrapped. He’s so appreciative he doesn’t even flinch when you’re cleaning out a cut with antiseptic.

You really know how to love him so well and he’s ready to receive ALL OF IT and love you back the same way.

Yone

Giving and receiving: Acts of service

Yone is another member who I think both gives and receives love the same way and that is through acts of service.

Whenever you bring him a meal or coffee, or just drag him away from his monitors for a brain break, that’s when he feels your love the most. When you bring food he appreciates anything you bring him, but the stuff he finds the most delicious are the things you make yourself. It doesn’t matter if you’re not the best chef.

Something that’s small but he really really loves is when you brush out and braid/play with his hair. Besides a hair stylist, you’re the only one he lets touch his hair.

He knows it’s not easy to love him considering his profession, so the fact you take the time and do these things for him? You take the time to make his life easier? Well it makes him melt tbh. (You are one of the very few lucky souls who gets to see soft Yone. You lucky fucking duck.)

His schedule is wacky, he’s often stressed due to deadlines, and his celebrity status makes date nights or just walking around in public a difficult adventure sometimes.

And because Yone knows being in a relationship with someone of his profession and status is difficult, he really tries to make it up to you and return your acts of service with his own, just to show you you’re always on his mind and that he really he loves you too, even if he can’t always be there to show you.

For example Yone always keeps things neat and tidy (a dream really) and he knows you well enough (I mean duh) that he knows where everything of yours goes, so you’re never shocked when you find your shared bedroom and bathroom perfectly clean and all your things exactly in their spots. You only wonder when he had the time?? (He just chuckles when you ask him.)

Whenever he’s not stuck at work, he’s incredibly sweet and helpful, doing all sorts of little things that just make day-to-day life so much easier.

You wake up after Yone and like coffee? Every morning he makes sure the maker is programmed to have a cup ready for you when you wake up. You cooked? Great! He’s got dishes no problem. You decide to clean a room? He’s either helping you do it or hey, pick any other room for him and he’ll clean that one.

And this doesn’t just stop at like day-to-day living things. If you come home stressed, before you know it you’re sitting in front of him, fresh out a steaming bubble bath, while he massages your shoulders/back and listens to you ramble about what has you so tense. His definition of acts of service definitely include things that spoil you.

Why do I feel like he makes a surprisingly good breakfast? I think he’d enjoy making a whole breakfast in bed meal for you, especially on a birthday or anniversary, but also sometimes just because he wants to surprise you.

Yone’s definitely a gentleman whose actions speak far louder than any words he could ever say.

[scarefox]

The way some people straight up deny soft criticism of the BL industry (stuff that isn't even a secret if you don't close your eyes and ears!!!) Criticism by literally LGBTq people working in said BL industry in Thailand..... basically one of the only ones who's voice are most valid here in this discourse. That's not hypocrism of people working in the industry to open their mouth! That's called self-awareness and using this genre to convey a message and trying to fix issues. This is about Step by Step and Lovely Writer atm. But those are not the only dramas who brought up some critic but somehow people get salty now about that little poke from SbS? Did you sleep the past 3 years?? And it's not a coincident that it's always the same topics certain BL dramas brought up!

I feel like some people here don't get that you can criticize your own work place, your own industry, your own country WITHOUT hating, shaming or demonizing it completely! Yall need stop this black & white thinking and the constant urge to feel personally attacked by something like this...

Especially the message of LW (the same people who make SbS now) was that there is nothing wrong about loving BL stories and they do like producing them. BUT that there are some things in the industry that are bad and harmful NOT ALL OF IT, SOME THINGS! Like the treatment of actors and certain topics by companies and producers. And the main theme of LW: the toxic overstepping and overcontrolling shipping culture that can (and did) destroy real life relationships / friendships under the weight of the pretend relationship (pretend as in they are not dating for real (everyone knows that! or should know that! this is also not even a secret if you watch interviews outside of the fun and couple game shows) at least in most of the cases.... in some rare ones yes, in some very rare cases some actors actually date but they are too afraid to come out due to homophobia and the way the industry & fandom treats those cases (source Dr. Thomas Baudinette who studies the industry as a form of queer asian media and interviewed companies and actors since years... somewhere in this he talks about actor relationships, I can't find the time stamp atm))

ALSO the point about exploiting the LGBTq community is NOT about the fans or LGBTq audience who love these dramas. But about businesses and literal Thailand itself. For using those stories and actors / couples for advertising, for marketing, for tourism even. BUT at the same time some don't care for real life LGBTq issues and rights or the fact that Thailand is still not agreeing on equal marriage (which is not just about them not being able to marry but they get denied a lot of things married couples get. alone the fact that they can't see their partner in the case of an emergency in the hospital because 'they are not family'). In the said SbS scene they were literally discussing which pretend couple has the most fans and how they could use their fandom and fan clubs to gain profit. Don't you guys get how fucking frustrating this is for the LGBTq people and allies who work in the BL industry, to get paraded in front of the camera for money and image but still don't get treated equally??? THAT is what they mean with exploiting.... And it's a lot of producers, writers and some actors who voice those points, not just these few self-aware BL dramas. But doing it through the medium they adress is the best way to reach the right people, to make the right people aware and ask for their support. Since they can't say such things directly (even though they should) unless they want to lose their job, they still like to a degree.

And I am sorry but the opinion of actual thai people who are inside that industry is more valid than some random fan who just doesn't want to understand those things in order to enjoy their shows without feeling bad.... What if I tell you that you can do both and that this is not about shaming you or making you feel guilty (unless you participate in toxic overstepping behavior or are actually LGBTq-phobic, then yes feel guilty)! Acknowledging issues, supporting to fix those issues and still have fun with these dramas and actors.... Those things can and do coexist and nobody said otherwise!!

[pastel-charm-14]

reading for fun

reading is such a wonderful way to escape into different worlds, learn new things, and relax, but sometimes it can feel like a chore. here are some tips to help you rediscover the joy of reading:

find what interests you: start by exploring genres, authors, and topics that genuinely pique your interest. whether it's mystery, romance, fantasy, or non-fiction, there's something out there for everyone. don't be afraid to try new things and see what resonates with you.

set aside dedicated time: carve out time in your day specifically for reading, whether it's in the morning with a cup of coffee, during your lunch break, or before bed. by making it a regular part of your routine, you'll be more likely to stick with it and enjoy the process.

create a cozy reading nook: find a comfortable spot where you can curl up with a good book and immerse yourself in the story. add some soft blankets, fluffy pillows, and ambient lighting to create a cozy atmosphere that invites relaxation and focus.

ditch the guilt: let go of any pressure to read certain books or meet arbitrary reading goals. reading should be a source of pleasure, not stress. give yourself permission to read at your own pace and savor each page without worrying about finishing quickly or keeping up with others.

join a book club or reading community: connecting with others who share your love of reading can be incredibly motivating and enriching. join a book club, participate in online forums, or follow bookish accounts on social media to discover new recommendations, discuss your favorite books, and connect with fellow bookworms.

mix it up: don't feel like you have to stick to traditional novels or lengthy tomes. explore different formats, such as short stories, graphic novels, poetry collections, or audiobooks. variety is the spice of life, and experimenting with different formats can keep things fresh and exciting.

embrace the power of rereading: revisiting old favorites can be just as rewarding as discovering new ones. reread beloved books from your childhood or revisit classics that have stood the test of time. you may be surprised by how much you enjoy rediscovering familiar stories and characters.

remember, reading is all about pleasure and personal enrichment, so don't stress about meeting quotas or reading the "right" books. focus on finding joy in the process and allowing yourself to get lost in the wonderful world of words. happy reading!

[unboundndd]

Hi everyone >:3

The Yone lover anon is here again!!!

OMG PARANOIA IS SO AGKSHSKABSHSHJSJSKS *convulses*

I have been analyzing every detail of the video clip and I have seen the statuses and tweets from the official platforms, it is always a pleasure to see our favorite swordsman interact <3

Well, getting to the point, I have already asked for this request but I wanted to see your execution cause, wow girl, I love your writing, it is exquisite :')

The request is this: Maybe a Yone x fangirl!reader?

Buuut, but but!! That their first face-to-face meeting was a surprise, I explain, she and Yone had met on Discord and had been interacting a little, when the two agreed to meet then she gets a BIG surprise, I hope I make myself understood

Sorry for the amount of text, I have expanded here

Anyway, I hope you take care of yourself and enjoy the new content that is coming out as much as I do

-🍄

Omg hi 🍄 anon!! ♡ Thank you so so much for your very inspirational Yone musings, I hope that me spacing out on the wordlbuilding a bit will not influence the pure fangirling that is going on in our heads!

In this universe Yone strikes me as someone who actually knows a lot about technology and i'm sorry... he produces music for rythm games. And yes he does those extremely complicated and highly detailed songs that are like the hardest charts in the game.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- Yone's career as a producer and DJ has not been the easiest one, the genres that fascinated him the most were usually not appreciated by a wider audience. The busy notes of electronic samples overlapping one another weren't designed to appaise the need for easy listening music in convenience stores or to climb the charts by becoming viral on social media, in fact the most recognition Yone's music had gotten before heartsteel was in the small niche of rythm game players.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- It was never the big game developers that contacted him, they had collaborations with world renouned producers and famous idols that voiced their characters. On the other hand smaller studios would often ask him to make one or two tracks for their games, which Yone would gladly accept to do. Despite the limited reach the producer was still proud of his work, always buying a copy of the games where his music appeared and keeping in touch with the communities that formed around them with a discord account that would't reveal who he really was.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- You were just a casual player of one of those games, sometimes coming into its dedicated discord servers to chat with like minded people. When people asked you about your favorite songs in the game you would most likely reply with one of the songs Yone produced, often going into detail about what made them resonate with you so much and what made them so unique in your opinion.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- Under the guise of anonymity Yone would sometimes join the conversation, asking questions and indirectly getting some feedback from you, even finding it helpful with his writer's block sometimes. It was enough for the man to send you a DM to discuss more of your shared music tastes, hoping you'd reply.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- Your discussions quickly settled into a developing friendship, you knew the man had an extensive knowledge in music theory as he would sometimes ramble about it with you and he also told you that because of a new job offer he would become more and more busy as time went on. You'd still keep recommending songs to each other but the conversations would be less and less, you missed your friend but you knew that his work was more important than chatting about music.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- That was until Heartsteel's debut was announced with a small teaser, showing all the members and a small snippet of their new single. You immediately recognized the familiar electronic sound of the songs that made you and Yone bond in the first place, the nostalgic feeling making you smile. You decided to send a link of the teaser to him, asking for thoughts and sharing the hype about the new band.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- Yone had never felt so guilty yet glad that he never revealed that he had produced those rythm game songs to you. You were so familiar with his style that you spotted it immediately, you could've uncovered that he was actually part of the band! He tried to stop himself from asking more of what you thought of the members, thought of him, but quickly surrendered to the fact that hearing you gush about how much you liked his music gave him even more reasons to keep going.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- When he asked who your favorite member was he almost spit water on his midi keyboard, causing Aphelios to turn around to see if he was alright. Yone composed himelf quickly, yet the message you wrote kept resonating in his mind. "Oh I'm totally in love with Yone, looking at him and his interactions on twitter he sounds like a bit of a band mom and I find it really endearing! He looks like a really calm person who surrounds himself with a ton of unhinged friends! Too bad he hasn't revealed his voice yet! "

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- Of course all of this didn't go past Aphelios, Kayn, Sett, K'Sante and even Alune. They realized he was spending more time than normal on his phone, reading your thoughts on the new promotional materials that were being posted. Kayn was the one who confronted him first and could not stop laughing when he realized Yone had started to develop some feelings for you, scrolling trough the messages the younger man could also see that you were starting to feel the same way for him.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- As much as the Kayn was amused at the absurdity of Yone falling for his online friend turned fangirl, he alsoknew he had to help his fellow bandmate, barging into the common room to tell everyone what was going on and fill Ezreal in as he was oblivous to the whole ordeal. It took all of them a good half hour to concoct a plan to make a meeting between you and Yone happen, then another half hour was needed to convince the producer that this was indeed a good idea and that you would not take it as badly as he imagined.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- When Yone said he wanted to voice chat with you out of the blue you were a bit confused but excited. You were happy to hear his voice after one year of being friends and made sure to reserve a few hours just for him, as you went about your day your mind started to wander a bit about what it would sound like and if your conversations would flow just as smoothly as they did via text.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- You were starting to feel a bit nervous when you picked up the call, timidly muttering a "hello?" and waiting for any sort of reply. "Oh Hello, it's nice to finally be able to associate a voice to the person." You could not help but squeal a little on the inside, who would have known that his voice sounded so rich and felt so mature? The two of you talked for a while about how long overdue your call was and how time had flown since you first met, it truly didn't feel like your first conversation at all.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- You finally gave into the curiosity and asked him if there was any particular reason for Yone to have wanted to voice chat now and his reply almost left you speechless. "So... I'm know that you're very excited about the debut of Heartsteel, one of my coworkers managed to get two VIP tickets and backstage access. The thing is that the person they bought the other ticket for cancelled last minute and they gave it to me." A carefully crafted lie exited Yone's lips, all to give you an excuse to go meet him.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- You couldn't help but feel a slight pang of jealousy for how lucky your friend was but you wanted to be supportive and expressed your joy for him and how excited he must have been. "Wait, you've got it all wrong. I wasn't planning on keeping the ticket." You froze for a second, all sorts of possibilities racing trough your mind. Then you heard it the notification of a discord message from Yone, he had just sent you the ticket. "Wait... so you want me to go?" You heard him chuckle as you were slowly realizing what this would imply, your heart couldn't race more than this. "You deserve to go and see them, you've kept an eye on them for a long time now. I don't want to impose it onto you so think about it for a while and let me know, will you?" Useless to say that you spent a very long amount of time asking him if he was sure about it and then thanking him profusely, this truly was one of your dreams come true.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- During the day of the debut concert the Heartsteel's members grand plan was put into motion: security was well aware that as soon as your ticket number was checked in they would have been able to identify you. Security notified their manager Alune and gave her a detailed description of your looks, she too felt happy about what was going on in Yone's life and told him and the other boys to concentrate on the performance while she took care of things in the background and made sure to give you and the producer ample time to talk.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- You had the time of your life at the concert, seeing how much energy and stage presence Heartsteel had in real life made their music video pale in comparison. The stage felt electric and once it was over you couldn't help but feel dizzy and overloaded but also oh so happy, seeing Yone and Aphelios playing alongside the other members was the highlight of the concert for you.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- So many things were going to your mind when you were queued up for the small meet and greet that was beeing held backstage, you were one of the last people and when it was your turn you couldn't help but feel like Sett, Kayn and Ezreal were all treating you like they somehow knew you already... and they were all hiding something. You felt their gazes following you as you finally approached Yone and even he looked like something was amiss.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- You tried to ignore the feeling, you were about to meet the artist that managed to capture your attention so easily and always kept you wanting for more. You would not let this special occasion be ruined by your gut feeling! You took a few steps and prepared to greet him, hopefully having enough time to tell him how good his performance was and how much you enjoyed rooting for his success. Before you could even say a word he anticipated you and for a second you thought you had misheard everything he said.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- "Wait... how do you know my discord username?" You heard a few of Heartsteel's members chuckle, you did not realize how quiet the room had become as you were the last of their fans there, the laughter was interrupted by Yone speaking again. "Cut her some slack everyone, it's normal for her to be confused right now." Yone could see your eyes widen in realization you recognized his voice, he was your online friend! The one who would always listen to your rambles about the latest chart topping songs and give you his insight on what would make them so popular, the man who somehow knew your taste better than you at this point and was able to always give you spot on recommendations... ·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- The grounding touch of his hand on your shoulder snapped you back into reality, you blinked at him in disbelief and confusion... and then realized about how much you fangirled about him while being unaware of who you were talking to. "There must be many questions running trough your head right now and I don't blame you if you're angry at me for never revealing who I really was. If I hadn't been under such a strict NDA at the time maybe things could have been different..." ·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·- You gave the man a reassuring smile, you understood why he did what he did and suddenly him asking you what you thought of all the new trailers and promotional materials made sense. You were kind of honored to have been able to give feedback -although unknowingly- to a talented artist such as him. "Maybe I could clear some things up for you over dinner... I was too nervous to eat anything before the concert." You gave him a quick nod and he motioned you to follow him, you saw him gather his laptop and headphones and haistly put them in a sleek looking backpack and then taking out the keys to his car. The rest of your time spent backstage was a blur, his hand around your back was swiftly guiding you through the various areas and muttering to security guards that you were with him if they happened to enquire about you. Once in his car he could finally drop the persona and relax a bit more, the Yone you had met online was starting to show himself more and more. "Do you have any particular preferences for food?" He asked while making his way through the still packed streets of the city. "Mmh... I think I'll leave the choice to you, after all you just performend in front of thousands of people on an empty stomach." You replied, smiling at how kind he was being to you even though he must have been starving for hours. "Fine, I saw a ramen small ramen place on my way here before the concert. It will give us enough privacy for me to finally make things up to you."

[lynnlovesthestars]

"I wandered lonely as a cloud"

Pairing: Astarion x gn!Reader (afab for eventual smut) Genre: hurt, comfort. Angst, smut eventually. CW: gore, past trauma, abuse, reference to SA, ptsd, ocd, feeling of inadequacy, fear of rejection, fear of loneliness, anxiety, depression, intrusive thoughts[...] Setting: Act 2. Synopsys: "let's pretend we are not alone"

AN: Hello my stars, I haven't wrote a fanfic in a while, though this is a mix between a fic and a collection of one shots. The story is introspective, as we dwell in the story, our focus will be on two lonely souls that find solace in each other's touch. It will not be an action driven story, but fear not, It wont just be cuddles and kisses! (Though we'll have plenty of that) Anyways i hope you'll enjoy this, and you'll find comfort in it.

I'm also going to open a tag list, in case someone is interested. (if the taglist flops, you didn't see it) I'll link the form here so you can avoid leaving it in the comments if you prefer!

Form.

Playlist.

Masterpost.

Loneliness was a strange feeling, sometimes it sprouted when you least expected it, but it hit you the worst at night. It was a feeling you grew accustomed over time, it coated your days, your food, your eyes. In a way it became your way of knowing you were alive, that deep down that emptiness you felt, something akin to a heart was beating, though lonely.

Everyone could see when loneliness was hitting you the worst, cause in the morning you would be more tired, eyebags would sulk your face and you would be avoidant.

The Last Light Inn was finally in sight as you descended the dark and shadowy path that the group of harpers pointed to. The bright glow of encircling the area was the only sign that could point at your way.

Despite the rough welcome from Jaheira and the harpers, they offered you a few rooms so you could rest while you planned your next moves. Jaheira took it on herself to give you a briefing on all she gathered in the shadowlands, but she could clearly see the dark circles under your eyes, and she knew them very well. The eyebags of a leader that needed rest and a warm soup. Little did she know that whatever you felt inside, it was much more than that. It was the thug you felt in your chest, the yearning for even the smallest touch. The need of closeness, like a body pressed against your skin as you dozed asleep. It was the daydreaming of respite in someone else’s embrace, safe and tucked away, though in that moment you wanted to concentrate more on the situation at hand: looking for the beds, cause for once in the past weeks, you didn’t need to set up camp or gather wood, or even sleep on the floor.

The group was directed towards the hen, where the strange ox from the emerald grove was moo-ing about its food. Jaheira gave you a key that would open a hatch where extra rooms would be tucked away. As you descended down the staircase, a soft light glimmered at the center of the space, where four doors were scattered around the empty communal area. A small kitchen sat on the side, while a fireplace was opposite to it. 

Whoever resided here before the darkness hit this place, was probably the owner of the inn and their family. The space was left clean, the harpers kept it in good conditions as they took over the perimeter of the inn.

You dropped your backpack near a door as you took a glimpse of the rooms: all of them had a poster bed that could easily hold two people and a partition to hide a bathing corner.

You opted to divide the rooms with the support of a coin flip. It was nothing against Lae'zel, but when the coin fell and it assigned you to her, you contemplated if you could have set a tent in the middle of the road. Your brain started churning ideas as the rest of the group was knees deep discussing on the beds.

"Oh don't sulk, Astarion" Gale played with the elf as he shoved his elbow in his hip. "I'm not an awful bedmate" 

"There's no way, I'm sleeping in the same room with you again" Astarion whined as he turned his head the other way. Then it hit you. 

Astarion.

Lae, do you mind sharing a room with Gale?" You asked, lowering your tone.

"Tck, are you trying to bed me and Gale?" She shot you a cold glance as you feing ignorance. 

She could think whatever if it meant you wouldn't hear her complaining every night. If you had to share a room with someone, you were oddly more comfortable with the idea of sharing your space with Astarion, and maybe it was for the fact that you were already closer. Feeding him every night meant learning how to share a small space and a closeness you were not willing to share with much people. Then in those nights you couldn’t rest, you’d sit together in front of the fire as you opened up to each other. It was a slow process for both of you, a little at a time you’d feed each other with bits of your hearts. You even mentioned a few times about that loneliness that was always devouring you, though you made sure to sugarcoat it a little, and he was very understanding of the bits you gave him.

You felt that you'd be more at ease with someone that understood loneliness the way you did, someone that wouldn't cross the boundaries unless you allowed him, cause if there was something you liked about him, it was the work he was doing on himself, relearning behaviors he couldn't claim before. Like the meaning of the word 'no', and how to trust, though he still pretended he didn't like anyone.

It was a shield he would put on, so that he couldn't get hurt or worse, rejected. He shared it with you in another sleepless night.

Though elves didn't need to sleep, during meditation something very akin to dreams was happening: your mind would focus on events of the past, over and over again, and you weren’t fond of your past crawling out again unwanted. Nevertheless, you both enjoyed sleep, there was something about those hours of nothingness that it made you breathe. 

Your attention was quickly drawn back to the room when Astarion and Gale were still bantering when Lae'zel lost her temper. "I'm done with you" She pulled out her knife menacingly, a good way to keep Gale in check when he would cling.

She pointed the knife towards Astarion first. "Tck, you take your stuff to Tav" She ordered, everyone's eyes were wide as they witnessed how she put them in check. Then she pointed the blade towards Gale, not a second of hesitation in her voice. "You sleep with me. You take the bed, I take the floor." She didn't wait for anyone's opinion, she picked up her belongings and disappeared behind a door.

You could still hear her complaining through the closed door. "Tchk, I don't like beds anyways, they are too soft"

Deep down you appreciated what she did, she understood more than what she gave away, and you would have to thank her one of those nights.

Everyone looked at each other speechless, before taking their turn to leave. It was an odd silence, a rare occurrence in your not so little marry-band. 

The room was definitely better than what you could see from a glimpse. It wasn't big, but the bed was big enough to fit you and Astarion comfortably, while the partition was just enough to create a nice bathing corner.

The bed was made with a set of linen sheets, and covered with a thick duvet to fight the cold of the shadow-cursed lands.

You dropped your bag on the right side of the bed before making a beeline to the tub. You spent a solid two weeks only in the underdark, the lack of water to wash you was agony.

You made good use of your magic by filling the tub with it, and keeping it warm. You labeled create bonfire useless a long time ago, when you noticed it was not enough to even roast a goblin, but it worked wonders for baths when you were short on time.

You were quick to discard your clothes and sink in the hot water, the steam coated the mirror in the room, as you allowed the water to caress your body.

Only a few minutes in the water passed by, and you realized how exhausted you were. Your movements were slow as you scrubbed away the dirt and sweat from your skin. You untied your hair, finally relaxing your sore scalp as you took your time massaging in your shampoo.

You wanted to go out for dinner, but when you put on your clean clothes, and tucked yourself under the comforter, that inevitable loneliness started growing thick on your body.

You wrapped your arms around your pillow as for a moment you wanted to disappear. Though you didn't want to move from there, you grabbed a book from your bag, your mage hand opening it and holding it for you as you tried to get distracted.

What was worse than being touch starved and in severe need of affection? Picking up the wrong book.

A fantastical love story between gods. If the book could make Umberlee and Valkur fall in love and find balance then why were you still alone?

You wondered if your parents angered a god when they were younger, and as a curse you ended up being shadowed by the incessant feeling of loneliness. 

As Umberlee cradled against Valkur's chest, you couldn't take it anymore. You dispelled the hand, letting the book drop down on the bed, careless if you lost the page you were at.

Your eyes pooled with the familiar salty tears, that night in particular it felt harder to shield yourself from the pain. So before you could fully have control of your body, the warm tears were flowing out like a river. 

It was your routine, in a way, to just let everything out at night instead of bottling it up, though the warmth of the comforter was not enough to satiate the warmth you wish hugged your body, yet you still tried your best to imagine it was a warm body that was pressed against yours. A soft hug that was trying to shield you from the outside. A whisper that reminded you it was okay to feel like this. Yet at the end of the day, you simply hid behind the delusion.

You didn't know how long you stayed there, in that fetal position you couldn't help but ball yourself into. Even after you finished all your tears and all that was left of it was the stains on your cheeks and your wet pillow, before Astarion appeared from the door, you were still cradled in that position.

You didn't speak or move, you just sunk a little more under the duvet.

"I noticed you didn't join everyone for dinner." He walked to your side of the bed, you couldn't see him but you could follow his footsteps before feeling his cold hand tap on your shoulder. 

"So I brought you some food" His voice was a whisper, as he slowly looked around the room, and then to you. Trying to catch what was going on. Insight check: succeeded.

"I know you are not feeling well, darling." He sat on the side of the bed, his hand gently swiping away a lock of your hair so he could catch a glimpse of your face. "But you need to eat something" This was a side of Astarion which you rarely had the chance to see, it was reserved for those nights where you allowed him to drink from you: the ever so soft touch and a voice that felt raw, more.. intimate. It was something that always made you cry later when you'd be alone, the closest you've been to that kind of physical touch you missed so much.

So many nights you wondered if he would be this soft with everyone he'd bed, until he admitted he didn't know how to be kind, caring, sweet, if not for show, and he wanted to give you some kindness back. 

You risked so much for him, including your neck, so he wanted to give you back at least a soft touch before leaving you to sleep, or the closest thing to some affection that he could manage.

So whenever he'd give you even the smallest of touches, you'd bask in it, taking as much as you could even from those small interactions.

His voice shook you from your thoughts again, his thumb swiped away a tear you didn't know you were shedding.

"My darling, what's going on?" You could feel the concern snicker between the honeyed words, trying to coax an answer from your quivering lips.

You wanted to find an excuse, something that would be much more serious than feeling lonely, yet all you said was that last word, a pained croak that escaped your lips.

Your heart clenched tightly as he hesitated just for a moment, wondering how much he could do to help you, without scaring you away.

But then he sat up, he took off the outer layer of his clothes, almost making you wonder if he already brushed your pained confession aside. He quickly reached in his bag for his nightshirt and made his way under the duvet.

He didn’t forget, at all.

With his face to yours he leaned forward, his palm touching your warm cheek as he finally could see you better. You tilted your head, almost silently begging for that innocent touch. Yearning for it.

His thumbs slowly dried your skin, catching the tears that would spill.

You both laid there in silence, you closed your eyes to avoid his stare, which was concentrated in taking in your shivering body.

"I understand," He whispered, almost as if they were hiding from someone. "I feel lonely too, every night" His voice was just like a caress against your ears, though it hid your same pain.

You wanted to say something, but no words would come out. The tadpole in your head squirmed, reminding you of its abilities just for a second.

Astarion didn't hesitate nor forced you out as you probed his mind, and when you were safely tucked in there, you just allowed your thoughts to flow free. Your every emotion spilling like a cup of coffee on the floor, even- accidentally- some of those memories of the loneliest nights where you just wanted to give up.

As soon as you slipped out from his brain, you sunk your head in your pillow, trying to hide those tears that you were starting to hate so much.

You couldn't comprehend what was happening at first, until your warm skin met with Astarion's cold chest. His arms held you close as he waited for you to raise your eyes to his.

He didn't know what he was about to say or do, he just allowed his dead and touch-starved heart to take control. 

Your gazes mixed in the middle, the veil that usually covered his emotions was pulled away, exposing his own hurt, his own need for affection, before his words struck you.

It was the occasional broken syllables that caught your ear, the way his mouth twitched and twisted before finishing a sentence, and the way his body would stiffen as he'd almost felt like a plea. It was not just to comfort you that he did whatever he did, it was for him as well.

He needed it just as much as you did.

His words would still echo in your brain whenever he'd caress your cheek. 

"Let's pretend just for a few hours that we are okay, that we fell in love. Let's pretend to be vulnerable. I'll be here pretending until you need me to, cause at the end of the day, we both deserve to feel loved, even if only for a split second. Let's pretend we are not alone." It was something between a hopeful proposal and a sad begging, something that reverberated through you like nothing has ever done before. His eyes were barely open as he still held you, you could tell from the way his fingers lingered on your exposed skin that he was taking the most out of this, for the eventuality that you'd move away from your grasp.

Instead you leaned completely against him, your head resting against his chest as you nodded.

His body softened around yours, his legs intertwining with yours as he'd place a kiss on your head.

[enmasae]

Desire of the fittest - Part 2

Self Aware Genshin Alternate Universe - Guide AU (my own take on sagau)

Previous - Next

Warnings :

Adult content (such as violence, bullying, toxic relationships, cursing, angst, nsfw, and others) and yandere behavior (such as obsessive and possessive display)

Theories and lore informations

Since this is my take on an alternate version of Genshin Impact, I've taken the liberty to include elements that may not align with the game's lore but will make sense in this particular story.

Content : And they were roommates, Totally not illegal business meeting, Casual conversation between a pigeon and a dog, How to deal with your partner's ex

"-and that concludes our coverage of the catastrophic disasters currently happening around the globe. On a brighter note, it was recently announced that the renowned game Genshin Impact will explore new horizons to celebrate its 20th anniversary. Today, we have the co-creator and current CEO of Hoyoverse, Mr. Wei, to discuss this highly anticipated event."

The small crowd attending the live show applauds as the CEO makes his entrance. Despite being in his fifties, the man retains a well-preserved appearance under the studio lights, his bright and confident smile illuminating the room. He nods in acknowledgment to the camera and extends a handshake to the TV host, who accepts it. Gesturing for his guest to do the same, they both proceed to take a seat on comfortable sofas.

"Thank you for having me."

The host eagerly clasps her hands together and leans forward, keen to gather more information about the plans for one of the most popular games in its genre. Even with the passage of time, Genshin Impact continues to serve as a source of inspiration for many and boasts a substantial player base worldwide.

"Mr. Wei, we're delighted to have you here with us."

The company's CEO offers a gentle smile, his composed demeanor standing in stark contrast to the energetic TV presenter.

"The feeling is mutual."

Immediately delving into the topic, the host follows the interview script he was given, narrating the current situation for his viewers and initiating a conversation with his guest.

"Several years have passed since Genshin Impact's main storyline came to a close, leaving fans eager to uncover the reasons behind the event announced on social media. While virtual reality has been, indeed, quite the talk in the gaming community since the release of the new AETHERAL&LUMINUS technology, we're curious to know why Hoyoverse decided to enter the world of cyber technology. What led to such decision ?"

Aligning with the host's expectations, the man in his fifties softened his features, conveying a sense of sadness to emphazise his point.

"You may call it nostalgia but the team and I wanted to provide players with the opportunity to immerse themselves in the world of Teyvat one last time before the server's shutdown-"

"Boring..."

As the television screen dims, the ceo's voice fades into silence. Setting aside the remote, you find yourself drawn back into the embrace of your current companion, reveling in the affection he showers upon you. His lips delicately trace a path from your collarbone towards your throat, eventually meeting your own. As your eyes lock with his, you feel him whisper against your breath, anger kindled by your earlier statement.

"I allowed you to have fun with that descender, isn't that enough ?"

Maintaining eye contact, you seize his shoulder and skillfully shift positions, placing yourself atop him. Taking control, you lift his hands from your waist and secure them above his head. Aroused by the demeanor you display, he decides to let you to enjoy yourself and refrains from attempting to escape your hold. Savoring the moment, you slowly bring your face closer to his, allowing your lips to meet once more in a gentle union. As his lips moves forward to taste yours again, you assertively seize his jaw and unhinge it.

"Since when do I need your approval ?"

He escapes your grasp, emitting a painful cry. Clutching his jaw, he quickly realigns it with an audible crack and assesses its movement. Surprisingly, he doesn't appear overly shocked by your swift anger. He has to admit that he provoked it when he brought up your vessel. Well, former vessel, much to his satisfaction. He never held much fondness for the boy, believing he consumed too much of your time. He sighs while reclining on the couch, bringing you into a tight embrace. His gentle hand runs through your hair as he relish in the scent of your cosmetic products. While he remains unfazed by your unpredictable behavior, he doesn't hesitate to flatter you for forgiveness.

"You don't, but I appreciate when you consider it."

You dismiss his sweet words, recognizing them as mere attempts to please you, yet you accept them despite knowing him. He's an adept at manipulating others, appearing to have their best interests at heart while exploiting them. He creates an illusion of comfort and understanding, yet beneath it all, he harbors disdain for emotional displays. Even while knowing that, you prefer to believe in the distinctiveness of your relationship. You hope that he genuinely cares, even though your own feelings are uncertain. While you're not exactly friends, there's a sense of comfort in being your authentic self with him. Though not lovers, you find solace in holding each other during chilly nights, making the mutual loneliness less impactful.

Neither of you can define what you are in each other's eyes. That's why treating him the way you do comes more naturally, it spares you from overthinking.

"I'll play along, but only if you give me a little favor."

He notices the quiet sadness in your eyes but decides not to mention it. Smiling against your lips, he offers a gentle peck, silently seeking permission to go further. Forehead touching yours, he inhales your essence as you part your lips. Confident yet respectful, he explores your mouth at a measured pace, allowing brief breaks between the playful twirls of your tongues.

"Name it, and it'll be yours."

As you gradually pull back, you notice the man pouting, clearly yearning for the warmth you bestowed upon him. Although his clinginess strokes your ego and you enjoy feeling desired, it occasionally becomes irksome. The aftermath of the previous night speaks volume of how long it has been since both of you engaged in such passionate activities. Given your shared affinity for dominance games, perhaps it would have been wise to dial it down a notch.

"I want to be part of your project."

Instantly, the dark-haired man rejects the idea with disdain, his pout transforming into a disapproving snarl, and his nose scrunching in distaste at the mere thought.

"Out of the question."

Even if you saw coming this outcome, it doesn't prevent the surge of anger rising in your chest when he dismisses your request. In a swift motion, he seizes your forearm right before you could reach for the nearest empty alcohol bottle. While his hold lacks strenght, it effectively hinders you from shattering the glass against his head. Closing his eyes, he delicately brings your hand to his lips, placing a tender kiss on it.

"Losing you would drive me mad."

He might have intertwined his own existence with yours, yet, sometimes, it doesn't seem enough to keep you by his side. The intensity of your fascination for his domain unnerves him. While he had hoped for you to hold a similar affection for the present world you both inhabit, he acknowledges that these dying lands can never exude the radiance of Teyvat. Perhaps it was his error to entrust you with its care in his absence. He should have foreseen it. Even if you claim otherwise, he can only witness how your need for excitement is akin to theirs.

However, the issue resides within him, as he cannot bear witnessing the disappointment reflected on your face. With a sigh, the one who calls himself primordial release your arm and speak in a subdued tone, avoiding direct eye contact.

"Hypothetically speaking, if I were to allow you to blend in among them, what's in it for you ?"

In response to your silence, the man peeks in your direction, observing your bewildered, crunched-up face. Baffled, he lacks the time to react as you seize the hem of his partially unbuttoned shirt, propelling both of you upward. Guiding him to the rolling chair behind his desk, you swiftly pull him into it. Vaulting over the desk, you perch on its surface, placing your feet on either side of the chair's armrests, leaving him nowhere to run.

"You're joking right ?"

Seizing a knife lodged in the table, you extract it with a resounding crunch of the desk's wood. Positioning it beneath your partner's chin, his shaved face provides no shield against the blade. The man chuckles dryly, raising his hand leisurely to grasp the weapon's tip, casually creating some distance between it and his neck.

"Sadly, i don't do jokes."

Releasing the knife, you allow him to toss it aside, observing its slide on the floor and joining your collection of 'toys'. He rises from the chair and gently guides your back against the desk. His hands trace the contours of your body, scarcely concealed by the remaining clothes he didn't ripped apart. His touch eventually lands on your hands, leading them to his face. His colorless eyes delve into yours, restraining unspoken feelings in the air, akin to words on the verge of being uttered. Relinquishing your gaze, his lips caress your ears, whispering his anguish.

"Tell me why you're so eager to go there when you can stay here with me."

Running your fingers through his lengthy ebony hair, lazily gathered in a disheveled bun, you pull his head in front of yours. Removing the hairpin securing his hair, you let it cascade down, framing both of your faces.

"Freedom, Attention, Love, Entertainment... All guides are driven by their desires."

Your thumb glides down his lips, parting them and revealing the piercing on his tongue.

"I'm no exception, Phanes."

The ancient being chuckles softly, his laughter resonating deeply. He allows you to lead him towards your lips, his own already parted and eager to savor the taste of yours once again.

"We both know you're more than that."

While it's true that at times you remind him of those bastards, he can't fault you for it as it's in your nature to act this way. He just needs to make sure you never consider returning to your roots. Despite being the divine one of both, he'll gladly worship your entirety to ensure you remain by his side.

"My sweet partner in crime~, why won't you let me take care of you ?"

You know that if he was given the chance, Phanes would drive you to the brink of insanity day and night, ensuring you forget everything else but him. Unfortunately for the man, you're not interested in such fate. He won't be the one to stop you from pursuing what you want.

"If you truly cared for me, you'll let me go."

At your words, the primordial one rolls his eyes and deliberately collapses on top of you, relying on you to carry his weight. Despite his slender build, you struggle to pry him off from yourself as his arms hugs you close. Unfortunately, all you manage to achieve is getting his hair out of your face. As he rests his head in the crook of your neck, he examines the hickeys he bestowed upon you as gifts from the previous night. Relishing in the fact he has matching ones on his own neck, he yelps in surprise when you tug on his hair and push him to your right. He grunts and sighs, his palm massaging his scalp, irritated with your behavior.

"Oh, yes. Why didn't I think of that earlier ? Allowing you to dive headfirst into an unfair game specifically designed to trap and torture your kind will truly show how much I value you."

You chuckle at his sarcasm, then hop off the desk to head towards your belongings.

"And here I thought you couldn't be funny."

The gentle sound of your laughter coaxes a shift in his grumpy demeanor, replaced with a heartfelt smile. He takes pleasure in the melodic tones and reciprocates with a contented hum. If he were to pick a favorite sound, it would undoubtedly be your laughter, closely followed by the lovely way you scream his name in ecstasy. Yet, his grin quickly vanishes when he realizes what you're holding. Closing the distance in the blink of an eye, he tries to snatch the small device from your grip. You skillfully dodge his attempts, refusing to let him have his way. Seizing his hand, you twist it with a resounding crack, forcing him to drop to his knees.

"Isn't this fascinating ? That such itty-bitty trinket supposedly holds all the rights you wield over Teyvat. Must be so tiny because, you know, there's not much to brag about."

Having an idea of how you got it, he mentally scolds his shades for being too lenient with you. While you marvel at the tear-sized pearl, you remain oblivious to Phanes breaking into a nervous sweat. You might not grasp its usage yet, but he harbors no doubt that if he doesn't reclaim it soon, you'll figure it out eventually.

"I am the sole reason for Teyvat's current state. It's only thanks to me that those fools can enjoy their meaningless life."

He frees himself from your grasp, swiftly snatching back in place his wrist. Glancing up at you, he watches as you casually toy with the device, spinning it around with the chain and frame-like ornement keeping it secure.

"Says the one who prefers to live in isolation while 'his' world steadily erodes itself after each little 'cycles' you make it goes through."

Before Phanes can respond, a loud whistle pierces the air, catching both your attention and his.

"Man, they got you there."

As the primordial one sees one of his shades making himself comfortable on the couch, munching on some junk food he found somewhere, he groans in annoyance.

"Ugh, Istaroth, don't you have better things to do ?"

The man appears to ponder for a moment as he reaches the bottom of his snack bag. Upon realizing the absence of treats, he deftly snaps his fingers, causing the bag to replenish itself as if it had never been touched. Propping his cheek on his fist, he grabs a handful of snacks, shoving them into his mouth and chewing audibly. Observing the snack bag mysteriously being propelled toward the trash can, he hastily gulps down the remaining food, sighing in disappointment. Nonchalantly inspecting his nails, he brushes off the snack's crumbs, seemingly unfazed by the threatening glare from his boss.

"Apart from watching the two of you acting like animals in heat ? Not really."

While you prefer to remain clueless about how long he's been lurking unnoticed, you see that Phanes doesn't share your point of view. Gesturing angrily at his subordinate, his eyes betray a poorly concealed anger as his lips curls in disdain.

"First off, how dare you disrespect our privacy. Secondly, get your mind out of the gutter, we're not fucking, it's just-"

Phanes comes to a sudden stop, taking in the situation before him. With him on his knees, perfectly positioned to reach your pelvis, one could easily think he's about to give you a head job. You chuckle at the sight of him swiftly rising to his feet and hastily adjusting his partially undone shirt. The shade appears unfazed by his boss's embarrassment, having witnessed and heard far worse.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. I'm not paid enough to deal with your abandonment issues."

The dark-skinned man reaches for a bottle on the floor but decides against taking a sip of whatever's left after some consideration. While Phanes busies himself searching for the remainder of his clothes, you saunter over to the shade in a seductive manner. As the divine being catches sight of your approach, he curses under his breath and feigns interest in the bottle in his hand. He flinches when you place your hand on his shoulder, while the other begins to caress his cheek.

"Hands off, sweetheart. I've got a keen sense of hygiene, and I know you didn't wash those hands of yours."

He swats your hand away from his cheek and pinches the other as if discarding trash, tossing it aside. You hum and flop onto the couch beside him, eliciting a grunt from the shade.

"Such perfect timing, Istaroth."

"With all due respect, which is none, screw you."

Glancing at the jewel in your hands, a mischievous impulse seizes you. Tossing the pearl towards Phanes, you watch as he dives to the floor to catch it, exhaling with relief upon success. With his head conveniently positioned at the perfect height for you to lift it with your bare foot under his chin, you compel him to look at you.

"Would you mind persuading your boss to let me do as I please ?"

Taking advantage of your momentary distraction, the primordial one signals to his shade to refuse, mimicking a throat-slitting gesture. Despite being molded from Phanes' flesh, he lacks the soft spot his creator seems to have for you, preferring to keep a safe distance from your antics. Even if his boss were to order him to indulge your whims, he would most likely flat-out refuse.

"Hard pass, sweetheart."

You glance at the divine being sprawled at your feet, examining his little trinket for any cracks. You rise to your feet, causing him to lose his head support and bonk his chin on the unforgiving floor. As the pearl slips from his fingers and starts its daring escape, he's on it like a squirrel chasing a nut, scrambling to catch up. Unfortunately for him, you reclaim it before he has the chance.

"And here I was expecting you'll be the first to want me out of here~."

Istaroth tumbles on his fist and then reluctantly straightens up, a smile spreading across his face's features. Rising from the ground, Phanes approaches you. While his arms gently embrace you, his gaze remains fixed on the jewel you're holding.

"Wait a minute... You want to leave ?"

As his gold-like eyes sparkled with excitement, he might sound a tad too pleased to your liking but you'll gladly take whatever enthusiasm you can get. You firmly press your palm against the primordial one's face, preventing him from reclaiming the symbol of his authority. The sound of his nose yielding under your palm reaches your ears, evoking a high-pitched grunt from him, not that you cared. With determined strikes, you approach the shade, affectionately pinching his cheek as one might do with a child.

"Exactly ! How clever of you ! Good job on figuring it out !"

You grab his hand and swap positions, flopping onto the couch and sending him stumbling towards the god, who's still inspecting his crooked nose in a mirror after you intentionally crushed it. As Phanes shoots a disapproving glance at his subordinate without even turning his head, the shade doesn't get a chance to speak, only receiving a grunt of warning from his boss.

"Not. A. Chance."

With no further resistance, Istaroth raises his arms in surrender and turns around. Displeased with how quickly he gave in, you shoot him a disappointed stare as he flops back onto the couch next to you. Feeling uneasy under your accusing gaze, his eyes avoid yours, darting away.

"Listen, sweetheart. If he didn't listen to you, he certainly won't give a shit about what I say."

Every gaze converges on the desk when Phanes' phone, emitting a distinctive ringtone, disrupts the room, prompting a weary sigh from you. Despite your expectations that he would have gotten rid of it by now, it becomes evident that the voicemail you recorded for him long ago still remains. A cringe washes over you as you hear your own voice trashtalking Phanes to answer the call. Istaroth appears equally displeased, emitting a grunt and burying his face in one of the couch's pillows.

"-fucking bitch ! You better pick up your goddamn phone if you don't want me to shove it down your throat and making you gag like the slut you are-"

A breath of relief escapes you as the deity declines the call upon checking the caller's identity. Unfortunately, the relief is short-lived as the persistent dialler triggers the ringtone once more, demonstrating a fervent desire to speak with Phanes. Having no intention of talking with this particular individual, he forcefully crushes his own phone, ending the incessant ringing. Tossing the damaged device into a nearby bin, he gestures towards his personal notebook to remind him he will need a replacement. Istaroth grumbles into the pillow, clearly irritated but reluctantly acknowledge the directive.

"Noted."

With a tilt of your head, you silently inquire for more information from the god. Phanes, in response, takes your hand and gently guides you to stand, initiating a comforting embrace. Creating a bit of space between the two of you, he delicately retrieves the jewel from the tips of your fingers, all the while maintaining an unwavering gaze with you.

"Don't you fret about such a thing, [Name]. As for your heart's desire, let me take a little while to think it over, and I promise to return with a delightful response just for you. In the meantime, I must have a talk with Istaroth. Would you be a darling and wait for me outside? It won't be long, I assure you."

Skeptical, you emit a doubtful hum, not entirely swayed by his sickly sweet display. Contrary to his anticipations, you don't put up a fight and merely leave the room with an nonchalant wave of your hand. As the appartment's door closes, Istaroth rolls onto his back, casually inspecting his nails as he typically resorts to when boredom sets in.

"Perhaps, it's time for you to let them go."

Regret floods Istaroth swiftly as his blood begins to congeal within his veins, causing him to gasp for breath and emit painful grunts. Collapsing from the couch, he struggles to lift his gaze towards his creator, his vision blurring with the intensity of his suffering.

"And I think it's about time you remember your place. Don't delude yourself into thinking that I've forgotten how you used to help them sneaking around with their ex vessel while I was looking the other way."

The shade gasps for air, sensing his body liberated from the torturous grip Phanes had on it. Coughing, his fist clenches as he swallows down any words that might further sour the mood of his creator. Over time, he has grown indifferent to such torment, losing the will to care or worry about his condemned immortal existence. While there is no hope left for him, there's still a chance for you to embrace the freedom he yearns for. Unknown to the primordial one, he is determined to help you achieve that.

"On the subject of discussion, I better mention this before it slips my mind."

Kneeling down, Istaroth keeps his head bowed, concealing the faint smile playing on his lips. Don't waste the opportunity he's granting you, because even he recognizes that time is running thin.

"Asmoday got killed."

Upon learning the demise of one of his shades, Phanes seizes his subordinate by the neck, pulling him up to his own eye level. Hindered by the contrast in height, Istaroth struggles to breathe, his feet flailing in the air as his creator seems to blame him for the distressing news.

"And by who ?"

Baring his teeth in response to the pain he endures, Istaroth chuckles drily as he struggles to breath.

"I believe- that the fourth descender- actively searching his lost guide within our quarters- is enough of an answer-."

A heavy silence falls upon the room, the air thick with tension. Istaroth's feeble attempt at breathing gradually fade as his creator's grip tightens around his neck. Shortly after, the only audible sound for the shade becomes the echoing reverberation of his own heartbeat in his ears. With adrenaline coursing through him, he looks in horror at the wide and contemplative eyes of his master, engulfed in anger prompted by memories from a distant era. An abrupt gasp resonates as the shade is released, collapsing at Phanes's feet. His heart pounds wildly, eyes wide with fear as his body trembles under the lingering tension.

"You're fired."

As the apartment door slams shut, Istaroth gradually allows his nerves to settle.

"Hourray... vacations."

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆.

　　　.   　　˚　　 　　*　　 　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　 ˚　.˚　　　　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　 　　 　　　　 ✦

"Well, look who it is ! The one and only [Name]. Still on a leash, I presume ? I guess some things never change."

Glancing at the dame lounging on your left, flaunting her arms on the rail, she grins with a wickedness that could make gods blush. You emit a dismissive grunt and slump against the fence, both hands shielding your eyes briefly before giving your face a vigorous wipe, as if hoping to erase her existence. Unfortunately for you, she has no intention of leaving you be. Even though you wish you hadn't, you've mastered recognizing her bewitching crimson gaze, no matter the vessel she assumes. Before you stands Valefor, one of your fellow guides fueled by an insatiable thirst for power. It's not that you despise her more than the others, she's simply an unnecessary pain in the ass right now. Given her impatience, you opt to ignore her until she decides to leave on her own. No need to make a fuss over someone undeserving of such attention.

"Come on, lighten up ! That's not how you should treat your best friend~."

After a nudge from her elbow, you grab your drink and navigate the mezzanine alongside the fortunate few selected players. The sight of their camaraderie before the competition sickens you. Guides, by their very nature, don't blend seamlessly. They never have, possessing too much pride for such alliances. True friendships among them are scarce. Typically, collaborations are brief, driven by mutual benefits before one inevitably betrays the other.

As you weave through the crowd, you notice flickers of recognition in the eyes of some attendees, coupled with hushed comments. Despite the revival of unpleasant memories under their scrutinizing gazes, you maintain your pride, holding your head high. You don't hesitate to reciprocate their side glances, forcing them to avert their eyes. As you head toward a more secluded area of the reception room, you notice Valefor trailing after you, engaging in a few greetings with others along the way.

"Wait- Listen, I really need to talk to you, alright ?"

You sigh at her persistence and come to an abrupt stop, causing her to bump into you. Seizing her wrist, you pull her into one of the VIP rooms and throw her inside, making her stumble before finding her balance. Unfolding a small piece of paper, you ignite it, strange symbols manifesting in the air with a golden hue. Running your fingers together, you cast a brief glance back at the frozen crowd before shutting the curtains of the room. Valefor watches in amazement as the curtains defy the laws of physics, their movement ceasing once you release them.

"Time stopping, uh ? Neat. Is it a little trick from one of your newfound friends ?"

Settling onto one of the cushions, you take a sip of your drink and dismissively ignore her comment.

"I was told by Istaroth that you were advised to maintain a low profile. Guess it was too complicated for a meathead like you."

Taking residence on a couch opposite you, she flops onto it like a toddler and begins playing with the electrical device that allows the couch to transition from a sitting position to a reclining one. Despite of the unsettling noise, you only angrily sip on your drink, at least for now. You're confident that someday you'll get the chance to annoy her in return.

"I'm a guide, I do things my way. Anyway, the little birdie didn't say much about what all the fuss is about."

After finishing your drink, you spit out a small gem resembling a pearl but shaped like a tear, retrieving it from your tongue. At this sight, Valefor mutters a quiet "gross" under her breath before recognizing what you're holding. As you place it on the table, the guide shifts position, perching at the edge of the couch with a broad smile on her face.

"Holy. Fucking. Shit. You're fucking nuts, you know that ?"

You're not crazy enough to snatch the real deal from one of the most powerful gods and keep it for yourself. The little act you staged earlier was merely a ruse to make him believe you'd attempted to steal it and coax him into doing what you wanted. Unfortunately for him, you knew he'd never give in to your demands. That's why you had Istaroth retrieve it for you, but from a far away future. And this is the one you're showcasing now, although she doesn't need to be privy to that detail.

"Phanes expects me to follow his rules, but I couldn't care less about what he wants. So, here's the deal. I'll hand over the little trinket, and in return, you use it to send me to Teyvat."

Doubtful as she should be, or you might have lost all hopes for her, she squints before bringing her face closer to it for a better look. When she glances back up at you, she raises an eyebrow, sensing that something is amiss.

"Why not just use it yourself to get there directly?"

You scornfully scoff and regard the jewel with disdain.

"You think I haven't tried ? It recognizes the one trying to use it, and unfortunately, it only listens to that slut. Even Istaroth couldn't get it to submit to him."

From what she knows, you're more of a whore than he'll ever be, but she refrains from mentioning it.

"And what makes you think I can when not even a shade could ?"

Well, you didn't have much of a choice to begin with. Even though seeking help from one of your kind implies you've hit a low point, you won't allow her to mock you.

"It's a bit of a gamble, but I figured someone with your abilities could tame this little thing. Or is your desire for power nothing more than a joke ?"

As her eyes twitch, you know you've won. There's nothing more effective than challenging a guide to get them to do what you want.

"Deal. But I'd like to ask a question before."

Intrigued about what she might ask, you tilt your head slightly as a silent approval for her to proceed.

"At the very least, was he good in bed ?"

A smirk plays across your face. You hate to admit it, but he's got some skills when it comes to giving pleasure. Not that you'll vocalize it, though.

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆.

　　　.   　At the same time 　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　 ˚　.˚　　　　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　 　　 　　　　 ✦

In one of the storage rooms within the same complex building, an elderly woman joyfully dances to classic hit that was popular in her time. Unfortunately, her little dance session is abruptly interrupted when a star-shaped portal unexpectedly materializes, tearing through the fabric of reality and remaining open long enough for its creator to tumble into the small room, dislodging multiple boxes in the process. Having served as a janitor for the company that owns the building for quite some time, she has grown accustomed to the unusual events that tend to unfold, allowing her to remain unfazed by the recent occurrence. With a frown directed at the spilled cleaning supplies, she removes her large music headset and exhales in mild irritation.

"Really ? This is the end of my shift."

The woman with platinum hair grunts in pain as she slowly rises, her eyes fixed on the prominent wound in her belly, her hand barely covering it. Growing irritated by the raspy voice of the janitor, she flicks her hand, silencing the elderly woman's chatter. The janitor's eyes lose their spark, becoming dull and lifeless, even though she's still breathing.

Limping her way out of the storage room, the injured woman curses under her breath. She loathes the fact that this puny descender caught her off guard, and she vows to ensure it never happens again. But for now, her priority is to get to Phanes. She needs to warn him that a greater threat is looming.

"Asmoday, don't you look terrible."

Disregarding her fellow shade, she attempts to walk past him, only to be halted by a hand on her shoulder. She hisses in pain and bats away Istaroth's hand, her golden eyes cautioning him not to mess with her, even in her weakened state. With an expression of utter disgust, he wipes the blood from his skin, staining his handkerchief, then meticulously inspects his nails for any lingering traces.

"Not that I give a shit, but you might want to consider changing styles. Let's be real here honey, red just ain't your thing."

Not in the mood to get caught up in her colleague's petty quarrel, she limps down the corridor, leaning on the wall for support and leaving gory and bloody marks in her wake. Hearing a snap of fingers, she grunts as she finds herself back next to Istaroth. Noticing the choke marks on his neck and the burnt skin causing his veins to protrude, Asmoday returns the animosity with a venomous retort.

"Have you seen yourself, asshole ? You look like shit that has been stepped on."

The shade dismisses her comment with a shrug as he gazes upward, the corridor lights flickering as if on the verge of fading completely.

"Well, that's what happens when you piss off our big guy upstairs."

Feeling a bit unsettled upon learning their master's sour mood, Asmoday glances at her fellow shade, puzzled about why he's acting like it's the best day of his life. It's been a while since she's seen him so genuinely joyful and carefree, almost seeming out of character. As he looks down at her while she coughs up a little blood, she can feel shivers going down her spine. A cheerful Istaroth is an unpredictable one.

But beyond fear, it unnerves her to see the typically grumpy god sporting such a crappy grin.

"Oh, please. You really thought he'd cut you some slack because you decided to wake up with a dick between your legs ?"

"And yet, you believe that playing the obedient lapdog will save your ass. I wonder who's the delusional one here."

As he peeks at one of the watches on his wrist, his smile tightens slightly. Confused about what he might be expecting, Asmoday's senses sharpen as the building begins to rumble. Glancing at her fellow shade, she realizes it's not just any ordinary earthquake.

"You didn't, you fucking pigeon."

Assuming a fighting stance, Asmoday grits her teeth to push through the pain as more blood seeps from her wound. It's solely due to her powers that she can still draw breath after losing so much fluids. Despite knowing she's not capable of defeating him in her current condition, even with his own bruises, she refuses to meet her end at the hands of a treacherous traitor like him.

"Oh, but I did. Though you're giving me too much credit. I simply distracted the infatuated fool with a threat he couldn't overlook."

The wounded shade struggles to comprehend why he would betray them after all this time. While she understands his disdain for Phanes and anything associated with him, and acknowledges that time holds no significance for him, she still wonders why he would sacrifice everything for you.

"Why go such lenght for them ? They're just a guide."

Istaroth's smile dims slightly as the lights in the corridor begin flickering once more. Glaring down at Asmoday, the shade shows no hesitation as he has already made his decision.

"You see, as for now, Phanes believes you're six feet under. Wouldn't want to disappoint him, now would we?"

With a snap of his fingers, Asmoday collapses to her knees, gradually turning to ashes with a betrayed look in her eyes. Brushing off the remaining dust from his pants, Istaroth hopes that she'll appreciate the scene reminiscent of Hiroshima back in 1945. He hadn't anticipated her survival after what that descender did to her, she's definitely tougher than she appears. Snapping out of his thoughts, he stumbles as the entire building trembles once more. Chuckling, he rejoices in your success.

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆.

　　　.   　　A little earlier　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　 ˚　.˚　　　　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　 　　 　　　　 ✦

Inspecting his bloodied weapon, Aether pays no heed to the bodies of the guards who attempted to halt him. Displeased with the fact that the weapon you blessed him with is dirtied by the blood of nobodies, he proceeds to meticulously clean it. Though not entirely satisfied with the results, he glances at the neon loosing their brightness. In the darkness, he assumes a fighting stance, prepared to slay anything in his path.

As the lights flicker back to life, none of the guards' bodies remain to the eye, only the slender figure of the man, seemingly waiting. The cold neons accentuate his thin face and well-nourished black hair flowing along his body. His silver eyes, almost devoid of color, scrutinize him up and down in a judgmental manner.

"You should not be here."

With chills coursing down his spine, Aether takes a step back and tightens his grip on his sword. With just one sentence, Aether realizes that he's facing something far greater than the shade he fought to reach this point. Even if Aether can feel he's at a disadvantage, he's not one to back down. Unfortunately for him, he fails to grasp that this man isn't merely annoyed by his presence in his domain. For he had become the target of all the primordial one's frustrations and anger, he should consider himself lucky he's still able to breathe.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you."

In the midst of preparing to strike, Aether is stunned by the sudden disappearance of his sword. Startled, he lifts his head to find the man's face mere inches from his own. With a defiant tilt of his head, Aether faces the towering man head-on. Swiftly reaching for a spare knife at his belt, he lunges forward with his weapon. Yet, he staggers forward as the blade slices through empty air, the man vanishing in a blink. Surveying his surroundings, Aether notices that all exits have vanished, leaving the room illuminated solely by a solitary neon light above. Alert, Aether startles as a cold whisper brushes against his ear, sending a shiver down the blond boy's spine.

"You could hurt yourself."

Glancing back, Aether takes a close look at the necklace adorned with a small jewel around his neck. Unable to shake the familiar feeling he gets from the man, he scrutinizes his features while searching for any apparent weakness.

"You remind me of someone."

The man scoffs, straightens his back, and puts some distance between him and Aether. While he kows that the descender is simply dragging out the conversation to buy time, Phanes decides to indulge him. Being quite picky about his conversational partners, he isn't normaly the type to engage in small talk with his enemies. However, he supposes he can make an exception for this one.

"Humph, do I ?"

Left with no more weapons to spare, Aether clenches his fists and attempts to think of a way to breach his opponent's defense. Sometimes, nothing works better than a little provocation.

"I know they're here. And I need to talk with them."

"Oh, you won't, not on my watch."

Aether charges towards the man, poised to strike him down. Just as he's about to land a blow, the man dissipates into black sand upon impact, causing the descender to tumble and fall to the floor. Confused as to why the tiles has transformed into the same sand the man turned into, the blond traveler is left in shock as the scenery completely changes. Emerging in a boundless black desert bathed in the light of three moons against a starless sky, he fights to regain his footing.

"How did it feel ?"

As the man's voice echoes through the air, Aether begins to panic, finding himself getting pulled into quicksand. Unfortunately, the more he struggles to escape, the further he sinks. The moons high in the sky appear to mock him, as if he's to blame for his predicament. Taking a final breath before being completely submerged, the descender has no time to react as he suddenly falls into what seems like an endless void. However, it isn't truly limitless as he swiftly touches the bottom, landing on his back.

"To be unwanted."

Gritting his teeth together at the pain, Aether refuses to give up and strengthens himself once again. Observing the new scenery, his eyes widen upon seeing you in the distance. With his first step, a crack forms at his foot and extends towards you. As he starts to run in your direction, shattering the stone-like floor like thin ice, you only move farther away, leaving him alone in this hellish environement.

"Not good, does it ?"

With the temperature rising, the floor finally gives up under his weight, causing him to fall once again. Using his broken wings to somewhat cushion his fall, he manages to land on his feet.

"I get it, you know. Out of all, I might be the one closest to understanding what you're going through."

Observing the fire ravage the lands around him, a strange itch stirs within him as he starts to recognize the scenery. It's an itch he cannot scratch, only indicating that something is wrong. As screams resonate, he remains paralyzed, unable to break down at the sight before him.

"Nowhere to call home."

He witnesses his sister weeping over thousands of corpses, her gut-wrenching screams breaking his heart. Before he can take a step in her direction and call out to her, her head unnaturally snaps 180 degrees. Under Lumine's hateful glare, he begins to notice the clammy sensation on his hands, his horror growing as he realizes they are smeared with blood. He shuts his eyes tightly and pounds his head repeatedly, desperately trying to convince himself that the man is merely toying with his mind.

"You know, it took me a while to discover what was going on."

Upon opening his eyes, Aether discovers that he is now bound to a chair, the furniture itself constricting his hands behind his back. Before him, Phanes lounges in a comfortable seat, casually playing with the shattered intertwining of fate that symbolized the connection between you and the renowned traveler. Upon realizing this, the descender struggles against his restraints. Yet, as he attempts to vocalize his desire to reclaim it, no sound escapes his mouth.

"They hid you well. However, once the secret was out, all they could do was to plead on your behalf, begging me to spare your life."

Seeing that his captive had much to express, Phanes impulsively snaps his fingers, only to regret it instantly as Aether unleashes a furious scream that pierces his ears.

"You're the reason they abandoned me- !!"

The primordial being hastily snaps his fingers once more, brushing his forehead to alleviate the headache induced by just one sentence. Truly, this descender possesses the ability to irritate him like no one ever has, and he considers himself a patient man. Disregarding the claims of the blonde traveler, he dismissively waves his hand, prompting the furnitures to move out of his way as he approaches Aether.

"No, no, no, no, I didn't do anything. You see, I merely allowed them to toy with you. Ultimately, it was solely their choice to discard you."

Watching Aether squinting his eyes, revealing his lack of faith in the god's words, Phanes laughs mockingly at the sight. It's pitiful to see the descender place so much trust in you, as if you could truly be concerned with his well-being. Despite the man's assertions, Aether believes there must be a valid reason why you had to leave him, which is why he is determined to find you. You wouldn't have casted him aside simply out of boredom, would you?

"There's much about guides that you seem unaware of... Quite surprising, considering where you come from."

Feeling the release of his restraints, Aether is abruptly pulled to his feet as the room is swept away by an unknown force. Upon opening his eyes after the wind dies down, he finds himself up in the sky, with floating pillars adorning the scenery. As the setting evokes memories of the place where he first engaged in combat with the sustainer of the heavenly principles, a bad chilling sensation runs down his spine as something seizes his shoulders.

"You're free to believe me or not, but I understand how difficult it is to live in someone's shadow. First, your sister, then, [Name]. Perhaps it's time for you to learn how to be yourself."

As the god takes a melancholic tone towards the end of his words, he snaps out of whatever memory he was recalling. Aether, still unable to move on his own, observes a door materializing out of nowhere before swinging open, emitting a bright flashing light.

"Whatever, who am I kidding ? You never learn from your mistakes."

Stepping aside, Phanes waves with a slight fake smile on his lips.

"Oh and, you might want to start running."

Glancing behind him, Aether witnesses the stone slabs breaking and tumbling down. Rising to his feet, he makes a run for it. With his wings shattered from his previous journey that was intended to be the final one, he can only rely on his legs to reach the door. Leaping through it, his consciousness fades away.

'Resetting complete'

...

{Words : 7387}

Heya, finally i managed to post part 2 ! Sorry to keep you all waiting. I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did while writing this.

Previous - Next

Taglist :

@lilisette24

[brights-place]

Hello!! I read some of your Trolls stuff and I really really like them! May I request Trollex, Branch, and Floyd with a super supportive s/o who’s experienced in a lot of genres of music and dance? They have a TON of instruments and they know how to play every last one like girl where did you get these???

Sheet music and music theory knowledge is through the roof like you’d think they teach it as a profession, and if they give them physical affection and compliments and actually just normal relationship stuff??? They are a puddle on the ground they are NOT used to someone close actively caring so much about them besides like family they love that shit, giving AND receiving 😎 (they can be shy about it sometimes tho it’s adorable)

Uhhh tldr local music nerd is smitten with their amazing s/o, they down bad tbh /j

If this is too much in a single request, don’t hesitate to message me in case this is too long!

Them Dating an Music Theory! Troll

Pairing: Trollex X S/O, Floyd X S/O, and Branch X S/O

Warnings: Lots of Fluff, Mild cursing

A/N: OOOOH I LOVE THIS REQUEST! this is so good okay okay! plus I do music theory myself so this is fun! >:D

Trollex

- Trollex loves the way you explain music theory in a way that is easy to understand and engaging

- He enjoys listening to them talk passionately about music.

- He enjoys watching you play music for you and analyze the pieces in depth

- He listens when you rant and explain Music theory to him explaining that music theory covers things such as pitches and scales, intervals, clefs, rhythm, form, meter and time signatures, phrases and cadences, and basic harmony for music which he nods his head listening to you - Trollex loves how you play many instruments and stares at how you play it with ease - Trollex listens to you rant about it and is very patient with you even with his short attention span and endless energy.

- loves the way you light up when you talks about things that are about music

- He asks so many questions and forgets since his brain is re-setting sometimes - He can't help but admire your dedication to studying and refining your endless knowledge of music - He loves that they challenge your preconceived ideas about music and open you up to new perspectives of different musical styles and genres.

- He loves your creative ideas and imagination for how to explore and experiment with music.

- He values your willingness to share your knowledge and experience with you.

- He loves the way you express yourself through music and many genres not sticking to one and enjoys how you dance with him to techno music

Floyd

- Floyd loves to encourage you to express yourself creatively and explore your musical side more around him which you obviously do

- He appreciates how you share music tastes with him and discover new songs to listen to together

- He finds your knowledge of music history fascinating and enjoy learning new facts about the origins of different musical styles.

- Floyd is fascinated by your ability to deconstruct a piece of music and understand how the different elements interact to create a cohesive whole

- Floyd can’t help be impressed by the way you can find common threads between seemingly disparate pieces of music and make connections that he had never noticed before and would ask more

- You love the way your shy emo partner aka Floyd opens up to you and shares his emotions through music with you

-You two enjoy discussing the deeper meanings of songs and analysing the lyrics together though he mainly stared at your face to see your focused face

- He loves to play you a song that relates to your current emotional state and makes you feel understood and comforted.

- He can’t help but be drawn to how your musical knowledge and understanding of music theory can shed light on your personality in ways that you may not have been aware of but he was aware of it

- He finds it amazing how you can deconstruct your emotions using music theory and communicate with you on a deeper level which he also does I mean he is the sensitive one and knows about emotions

- He can’t help but be amazed by how much you can learn through many genres of music and their musical knowledge… I mean he’s Pop Rock but he can’t help but be shocked how you know ALL the genres

- He can’t help but be charmed by the way you approach music with pure enthusiasm and wonder as he stared at you lovingly.

Branch

- You both feel a strong connection with each other through music and can tell that you're both on the same wavelength even though he doesn't show it much,

- He can't help but admire the way you are fine with how branch can effortlessly switch between serious discussion and playful banter

- He finds it adorable when you become shy and blushes after realizing you have been rambling on about music for too long.

- He loves when you start sharing your favorite songs and artists with each other and discovering new music together

- He loves to support your creativity and encourages you to express yourself through music. - Branch can’t help be impressed by the way you can find common threads between seemingly disparate pieces of music and make connections that he had never noticed before and would ask more about it towards you

- He's impressed by your intelligence and knowledge of music theory.

- He finds himself admiring at your musical skills and wishing he could play or compose music the way you do.

reblogs + comments are appreciated ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

©brights-place 2023 — do not repost on another platform, copy, translate or edit my works! if you fit my DNI list please don't interact!

[ze-writing-qprs]

Alastor x GN!Reader - 2

Headcanons [🩷QPR]

PART I

Alastor and Reader are aroace

Queer-platonic Relationship (do NOT read as romantic)

Fluffy n cute

Nothing is meant to sound or be s*xual (I am aroace and some stuff I say comes off that when I don't mean for it too)

Considering making a part 3

TW: Mention of cannibalism

PART 2

Alastor cooks for you

He listens to the radio while he does (I mean he is the radio demon-)

Has offered to let you try venison (raw) and demon (also raw)

You both give each other song recommendations (I like to think he enjoys most genres of music)

Dancing in the evenings as sunset peeks through the windows

He taught you a lot of dances (If you know how to dance, you taught him some as well)

Will sing to the songs he knows while you dance together

If you ask he might sing you to sleep

Has asked before if he could take a bite of your flesh (Again, he is a cannibal. But he respects you)

You take walks together

You try to find decent cafès or hole-in-the-wall restaurants to go to, this is usually difficult and most of the time you end up taking him to somewhere in cannibal town

He loves when you discuss music with him

You bash on Susan together

Alastor hates when you mention the “box faced man” that “seems to have a homoerotic crush on him” (your words, not his)

He gets all quiet and won’t look you in the eye when he is mad

He tries to distance himself and you take that as a sign to give him space to cool down

If he is just annoyed he will roll his eyes

But for you though, he doesn't seem to take the hint when you get annoyed or mad

This may cause you to give him the silent treatment (He understands at that point)

It’s a little unhealthy

You’ll learn to communicate better (he just might be a little.. difficult at times)

Like a true gentleman he will give your hand a kiss as a greeting

You both give each other forehead kisses

I like to think that he will just hold your hands randomly and play with your fingers

It’s cute

If you make him flustered he will lay his ears against his head

If you want to and play your cards right, he might let you cuddle together

You guys are cute.

[lucakaneshiroswife]

!- RANDOM LUCA KANESHIRO HC’S -!

Warnings: suggestive content

Genre: NSFW

Word Count: 553 words 3,102 characters

Published: 5th July . 23

! Minors and Blank blogs DNI !

"You are perfect to me..."

Despite being seen as ‘innocent’ or just ‘unaware’ of innuendos and certain types of remarks that he might parrot or say everyday, he does make them a lot, often leading to you being given hints without your knowledge until you come to him. That’s his way of showing that he wants something without being too straightforward about it, he is just smart.

Yet at the same time, Luca’s confident and charismatic personality shines through in the bedroom, his magnetic presence and captivating gaze make it impossible to resist any of his advances when he does decide to come to you and be straightforward. Be careful that only happens when the matter cannot wait.

His natural charm that is often noticed by everyone around him extends to the intimate moments he shares with you. He knows exactly how to make you feel desired and cherished, showering you with compliments and affectionate gestures that leave you weak in the knees.

Along with his mischievous grin and playful nature, Luca tends to enjoy exploring new experiences with you. Not only is he open-minded but he is also very adventurous, always eager to discover more about your interests within the bedroom and bring them to life in exhilarating ways that you can't even imagine in your wildest dreams.

As seen on several of his endurance streams, it’s fair to note that Luca is more patient than most people, while he does have his moments of getting pissed off at losing too often, he never gives up and keeps going, which also translates to when he takes his sweet time exploring every inch of your body, until he finds the spots that make you squirm and quiver with pleasure. So be prepared to lay in bed for hours on end without knowing when it will end, but you better trust that your mind would be too clouded by pleasure and just too distracted by the unforgettable sensory experience you will be having with him.

Communication is key for Luca. He values open and honest talk, constantly encouraging you to share more of your desires and boundaries. He would make sure to have ‘Secret meetups’ that aren't much of a secret really, simply to make you feel more comfortable about talking about what you wish to try and what you wish to stop.

He is such a sweetheart both in and outside the bedroom, would spend days between your legs without growing tired, he doesn’t even care about his own pleasure, surely sometimes he cannot take it anymore and has to take you the way he pleases but that's for another time to discuss as long as you feel worshiped and are gasping in pleasure, tears decorating the corners of your eyes serving as a testament of how good he is making you feel, he is more than satisfied.

Luca’s energy and stamina, oh god, both awe-inspiring. He is always ready to go the extra mile for both of your satisfaction. With him, pleasure becomes this marathon of intense connection as his one and only goal is to leave you breathless and craving for more, he wants your body to memorize how he makes you feel, he wants to cloud every one of your thoughts, that way he never leaves your mind, he thinks that is cute <3

A/N: Luca brainrot Luca brainrot Luca brainrot, I cannot even begin to explain how much of my brain he takes up daily, I had to get these out of my system AND THIS IS NOT PROOFREAD FORGIVE MY MISTAKES.

ART CREDITS: @/LoiS_loisss -> twt

[bunwritesss]

Rock On

Summary: Daryl always brings you adorable gifts from his runs, and one day, you get to return the favor.

Genre: Fluff

A/N: Hi! I'm so happy to write again, and in english nonetheless! <333

Anyway I still struggle writing Daryl, so I really hope he is not too OOC in this oneshot. I see him as softer with Sunshine!Reader, because he knows how sensitive they are, and he is so fond of them.

I apologize for any mistake, english is not my native language! ♡

Hope you'll enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it <3 And if you like this oneshot, I posted another one this morning 🥰

Have a nice day/night!

You loved going on runs. Going out of Alexandria for a while, having fun with your friends in shops filled with useful things to bring back to your community. And nearly dying two or three times in the process was honestly part of the fun, at this point. The adrenaline was exhilarating, and you cherished the sweet embraces you shared with members of your group after a danger. So when Maggie and Glenn asked if you wanted to come with them on a supply run, you immediatly said yes. And you were glad you did.

And in a corner of the shop, under piles of dust, you found a bunch of sunglasses. After going through all of them, you finally found what you were looking for. Sunglasses that Daryl Dixon would appreciate. So you wrapped them in your T-Shirts to protect them, and tucked them into your backpack with a huge grin.

First of all, you found an almost intact grocery store, bringing home lots of edible supplies. You were also the one discovering a brand new pasta maker in a corner of the shop, begging Glenn and Maggie to let you keep it in order to shut the mouth of your unbearable neighbour who talked about it day and night, and they accepted with great pleasure. In fact, everyone in the community would see their lives improved if Mrs Neudermeyer finally obtained the item she had been begging for for months.

And most importantly, you found a clothing store. There were a few T-shirts with pictures your favorite band on them, but also Spiderman pyjama pants for Carl, and new outfits for everyone. You were overflowing with joy while thinking about your ripped jeans and badly patched-up shirts back home, and about how much comfortable your new clothes would be. Clothes weren't considered a priority by everyone in your group, and a lack of diversity in the community's clothing section was a common subject in your current discussions.

Although Daryl never complained about anything, you were observant. You had seen him squinting his beautiful blue eyes everytime the sun was facing him, or how red they were afterwards. And you had always been told blue eyes were more sensitive to the light. So you had taken matters into your own hands, and were so proud of it. Daryl always tried his best bringing you things you would like from his runs, and finding gifts for him was so much harder, since the man was not a materialist. Now, you were finally able to return the favor.

As Glenn drove you back, the truck filled with your findings you took the sunglasses out of your backpack, fiddling with them. You were almost sure he would love them. They were the only ones without strasses or fluorescent patterns, and the only distinctive sign was a tiny A on the branch. You chuckled while thinking about the jokes you would make about said A, Maggie turning to you.

They had tried conversating with you as well, but gave up when they noticed your dreamy expression and how careful you were with the item. The drive home was not long, and when you got out of the car, Glenn prevented you from taking one of the box of supplies from the truck.

'Why are you laughing?'

'Thought about something funny.' You replied, and she smiled, turning back to continue her animated discussion with Glenn.

'Go give Daryl his gift, you'll help us after.'

You opened your mouth to thank him but he simply winked, turning away to take a box. So you started jogging to Rick, seeing him wandering around. If someone knew where Daryl was, it was him. Or Carol, but your friend was probably busy with the ladies of Alexandria at the moment. After a few questions about the run, Rick finally gave you Daryl's location with a knowing smile, and you walked as fast as possible, so excited to see his reaction. Focused on your steps, you would probably have walked right into him if he had not stopped you, a steady hand on your shoulders.

'Easy, trouble. What's getting ya so excited?'

He gave you one of his fond smiles, seeing you so focused and proud. He knew you were back from a run, and seeing you unharmed was making him happy.

'I brought you a gift!' You proudly declared.

His eyes widened in surprise, but his neutral expression quickly came back.

'Is that so?'

You nodded with even more pride in your eyes, taking the pair of sunglasses out of your pocket and delicately dropping it into his hand. He immediatly brought it closer to his eyes, examinating it. You bit you lip, suddenly extremely anxious about his appreciation of the present.

'Ya think I'm a rockstar?'

You looked up just in time to see the crooked smile he was giving you, and you shrugged, a faint blush appearing on your cheeks.

'I think your eyes are sensitive to the sun and it's time for you to take care of them.'

And as he was putting them on, you added :

'Plus, you'd look adorable with these on.'

He scoffed, turning to you. You were right. He was absolutely gorgeous with the sunglasses on. Uneven bangs were framing the accessory, and you refrained yourself from tucking them away.

He took the sunglasses off, delicately playing with them. He was holding them with the most care in the world, as if they were made out of glass, and you could barely contain your joy. He liked your present! He squinted at the letter on the branch, his eyes going from the item to you.

'How do I look?'

'Cool as hell. It'll look even cooler when you're on your bike!'

'A? Why A?'

You pretended to be confused.

'For your name?'

As he furrowed his eyebrows, you continued, barely contening your smirk.

'Isn't your name Aryl Dixon?'

He rolled his eyes, fakely annoyed, a little smile betraying his whole act. He could never be annoyed at you anyway, and you were well aware of that.

Not wanting to overwhelm him with your excitement, you slowly backed away.

'They look good. Thank ya kid. Ya did good out there, happy to see ya in one piece.'

'I'm so happy you like them!'

'I'm going to help the others carry the rest of what we brought to inventory! See you later!'

He put the glasses on his head, forming devil horns with his right hand. You replied with the same gesture, happily walking back to the others. Your grin did not go unnoticed, Maggie being the only one to say something about it. She took a box from the truck, approaching you.

'I'm taking your huge smile as the sign he did not like his present?'

You laughed, taking the huge box of hygiene products Maggie was giving you.

'Oh, he hated it.'

[onlyzhuyilong]

Zhu YiLong being a judge for the first time at the Tiantan Awards at the 14th Beijing International Film Festival saying candidly his first reaction was nervousness because: “I have never done anything like this before, I don’t know if I am qualified or what to do. They’re all unknowns to me. As a young actor I’m trying to figure out how to communicate or express myself in judging such things.” Zhu YiLong though being the youngest jury member is already a skilled film actor particularly since winning best actor at the Golden Rooster Awards in 2022 & debuting his first Un Certain Regard Award nominated Film Only The River Flows at Cannes Film Festival 2023.

After the process had began Zhu YiLong said: “I’m very focused on this work, devoted myself entirely to watching movies on the Campus. I’m thoroughly enjoying it very much.” ^^ How the judging process works: Zhu YiLong describes: “I start watching films after lunch - about 3-4 films a day - have dinner around 6pm and finish work around 9pm. I like to digest the films afterwards before recording points of interest, noting any problems or particulars and then I prepare a discussion speech for our group discussion. I do all this one day and then repeat for the next day with more films to watch!”

They asked doesn’t seeing that many films day by day make you tired of films? Zhu YiLong says “ all the films selected were very interesting, and all different in terms of genre, material selection, cinematography, and culture - there is great variety.”

Zhu YiLong revealed the judges main concern was whether to focus on creative expression of the film or how it engages and connects to the audience in ways of being entertaining and pleasing to view.

“You need to have a good balance and a fusion of both - to express yourself artistically whilst being entertaining and engaging for the audience. This way it will encourage the audience to go to the cinemas.”

The final meeting for the award takes place behind closed doors and lasts about 2 hours. This is where the judges give speeches on their findings and their preferred films, and finally it is put to a democratic vote. Each judge has their own tastes, at this moment Zhu YiLong likes more extreme works fused with heavy artistic expression and thought provoking genres. One highlight of this experience for Zhu YiLong was meeting filmmakers from across the globe and getting to experience films from all over the world. He enjoyed the experience but vows to continue making more films “I’m in the creative age of my life now, so my focus is on making films and works.”

Question to Long Ge: what defines a good actor in his perspective as one himself, his answer was: “vivid, natural, unified, and measured.” It is a question he has been pondering for years about himself - how to be a good actor? “This has always been the direction of my own efforts. To capture that vividness and the nature of the premise and how to fully integrate yourself into the film. How can you help the director through this character properly express what this film wants to express? Instead of just completely immersing yourself in your character, you add something of your own to the film to make it relevant.”

Zhu YiLong isn’t the type to express his thoughts and opinions publicly because he believes every actor and filmmaker has their own methods, standards, and individual ways of expression. Nobody is the same. There is no right or wrong answer. “I’m just striving to better myself, and at this moment in time these are my thoughts but they can change as time goes on.”

[chiarrara]

Nanami anon here. I really hope they develop Mahoro with these sorts of themes in mind. I can't believe I forgot the princess aspect of Nanami, it's such a big thing in Utena in regards to self delusion and how people end up stuck in gendered social roles. This general perspective is what's keeping me interested in Bucchigiri cuz I can see so much potential for that sort of depth. I'm so glad I could help spark this sort of discussion (it's been sorta hard to find people willing to engage with these kind of interpretations).

Hiiii Nanami anon! I'm so glad you came back!!

Yes I think this story is so interesting even just in the potential it sets up. If it doesn't deliver on that potential it could be disappointing, I guess. but it brings up a lot of interesting discussions either way, so I'm just enjoying where we are right now and the conversations going on in the criminally tiny fandom.

To be completely honest i spent a lot of time arguing with people about the literary worth of this show on another platform and it was just depressing. Nobody wanted to engage deeper than surface level appeal, and only would approach it through an extremely narrow lens of expected tropes of the type of show *they* wanted to watch, and a demand for pandering to one type of fan in a genre it doesn't even really belong to, instead of honestly approaching it for what it is and the story it's trying to tell. I've been trying to curate my experience more so I can actually enjoy myself, and interacting with the small community of people here who actually like to enjoy and analyze the show within the literary conversation it's clearly trying to have has been so much more fulfilling.

ANYWAY, I love what you're bringing up because self-delusion is such a big theme here! and specifically how it interacts with compulsory gender roles!!! Like, Arajin is trying so hard to fulfill compulsory heterosexuality, but is running away from the very masculine coded honor-through-fighting that senya and the general culture value. A lot of people suspect that his pursuit of losing his virginity is a way to make up for his self-perceived weakness and failure to uphold the masculine ideal of honor-through-fighting when he was young.

THEN when MAHORO stands up and displays that ideal, he is able to achieve it (at least for a moment). There's also discussion that if this follows Aladdin, he's going to lose the genie and some point and will have to essentially prove himself as honorable without the genie's help. This could be interesting. We'll see what happens.

So is fighting masculine coded in this show? Or is it just the height of honor? Or is fighting for the right reasons or in the right ways honorable. Because not all the fighting is portrayed as a good thing.... I'm thinking out loud here.

Anyway, Mahoro is also stuck in this gendered role obviously, but I wonder how much self-delusion will play into it. She believed she needed to use her role as a cute girl to stop the fight, but all those attempts failed. Ultimately what worked was dropping the facade, dropping the role & those tactics, and standing up to fuckface (i do not care about this man I'm so sorry lol) as HERSELF. Saying what she really thought, how she really felt about these people and the whole situation. And basically willing to sacrifice her well-being to do so. Ooooh this is so interesting!!!!

I really can't wait to see where this goes, I know I keep saying that but. It's true. I mean, Matakara could be said to have some delusions about honor. Maybe the way he sees his brother is diluted. He believes in Arajin to a fault, but he was proven correct. Although it wasn't him that sparked the change. I dunno, a lot to think about.

I'm so glad I could be an intermediary for this discussion! I don't know anything about Utena, but if y'all do feel free to talk through me lol. I'm loving this.

[chicken-fifi]

Jang Hanseo (Vincenzo) Headcanon | Him as a Boyfriend

Pairing: Jang Hanseo x Fem!Reader

Requested by anons: (1) Hii!! Can you please write jealousy and boyfriend headcanons for Jang Han Seo,Jang Han Seo and Youngwoon from Vincenzo? Thank you in advance 💝 and (2) Since your reqs are open 🥳 can I pls request dating and smut (if you're not uncomfortable) headcanons for Jang Han Seo and Jang Han Seok with a female reader? Tysm 🫶.

Genre: fluff, angst, NSFW

A/n: please check out the SFW A-Z for Jang Hanseo for some of the references made in this headcanon. i hope you enjoy this!

Tunes: i decided to watch Jeffrey Epstein: Filthy Rich. dear lord help me.

Dating

As discussed in the A-Z

Dates are far and few in-between for all of the reason listed in that post

The dates that you do go out on tend to be in very quiet and small places

Diners

Cafes

Not places one would think to find a man like himself

The dates that occur at his home are just as private, but more relaxed

The two of you cooking dinner together

Until you realize just how bad he can be in the kitchen and you take over

Dinner is usually eaten on the couch watching a movie or a show

It’s very lowkey

Other than these dates

He’s very quiet when you two aren’t together

He does text you and call you in private moments just to check up on you

Hear your voice

Let you know he’s not toying with you

He also send you flowers

Every week

With a long letter apologizing for not being able to be the boyfriend he knows you deserve

Saying he understand if you were to ever leave him because you deserve someone who won’t hide you from the world and will introduce you to others as their girlfriend and not pretend like they don’t know you

This stage is rough ngl

Jealousy

Given all of the above

It’s not surprise that he gets very jealous

Very easily too

He’s well aware that he’s too distant from you on any given occasion

Even if he knows or thinks that it’s for your own good, well being, safety

He gets pouty and almost childlike in these moments

But he never shuts you out

Not completely at least

He does pull away and it’s like a puppy who has been rejected by their owner

It takes a lot of physical affection

And verbal reassurance

To get him through this

Despite the many instances in which he gets jealous

Each one is solved through some solid communication and reassurance

NSFW

I mentioned in the A-Z that Hanseo is a sub

Outside the bedroom

Remember that

Inside the bedroom things are very different

Yes he does have subby tendencies

And given his personality

I do believe him to be a soft dom majority of the time in your intimate moments

He’s a dom in a sense that he wants you to be pleased

In every way he please you with his body

He can be rough

But passionate

Sex with him is an other worldly experience to put it simply

He will leave you spent

But will take the time and energy to bathe you and help you relax, clean up

Aftercare might as well be his love language here

That being said

Sex isn’t a must for him in your relationship

But it certain does help establish a sense of seriousness that hadn’t been as evident before

Because during all of these intimate moments

Hanseo shares the future he sees with you

Promising,

Sometimes in tears,

That he will give you the life you deserve as his wife

[darlingofdots]

Hello as someone who did half of a thesis on trans romance novels before realising academia wasn't entirely compatible with my health, I am still VERY excited by romance academia and romance academics. Would you like to talk more about your PhD?

Academia is barely compatible with life, I feel you xD

Basically I'm very interested in interrogating and dismantling the standard hero/heroine language because I don't think that it serves us anymore. The genre has evolved so much that it feels really reductive to say 'this is the hero because it's a man' and vice versa, and that's even before you start considering queer and same sex romance novels. I do believe that the protagonists of a romance novel have different narrative roles! They're just not rooted in gender, or at least not just. For example, it used to be that heroines were always young women who were sexually naive and heroes were older, sexually experienced and aggressive men, and that is demonstrably not true anymore. I'm investigating the functions of the romance protagonists in the romance narrative with the goal of proposing a different classification, so we can finally talk about different relationship constellations within romances with accurate language and understand the actual roles they play better. Figuring out how stories work is one of my favourite things to do both as a writer and an academic, because I love finding the patterns and traditions inherent in storytelling--what does this building block do and where does it come from? Why does it look like that? What happens if you take it away?

Romance scholarship is super fun because there's so much material to discuss and not that many people who are discussing it, but it's also difficult because a lot of the discussion has been trying to defend the genre and scholarship thereof against stereotypes and misogynist dismissals from other fields, so there's not as much foundational material as you often hope. There are so many exciting things happening in the community though! I recently attended the 2023 conference by the International Association for the Scholarship of Popular Romance and had an absolute blast both because the presentations were fascinating and because everybody there was just so bloody lovely. It was so wonderful to be in a room full of people very seriously discussing possessiveness in sports romance or the folkloric themes in KJ Charles novels and never have to justify your interests or preferences.

Popular romance is such a staggeringly wide field and yet so many people have absolutely no idea about how the genre works. Mainstream media and scholarship are so outrightly dismissive of it that the majority of people, even voracious readers!, have such a skewed idea of it that they refuse to interrogate because the image of the white, straight, cis bodice ripper is so ingrained in their head and it never occurs to them that that might be an incomplete picture. It's especially egregious to hear this stuff repeated by fanfiction readers because the line that separates shippy fanfic from romance novels is so thin it's practically imaginary. If somebody only read Game of Thrones and then went on a rant that all fantasy books are horrible and stupid and anyone who reads them must be intellectually inferior, they'd rightfully be called a dick, but people say these things about romance novels all the damn time. Get off your high horse! Acknowledge that women are people and things enjoyed by women have merit! Broaden your horizons! Ask a romance reader for some recommendations and maybe you'll even end up enjoying yourself!

[nieves-de-sugui]

The Yaoi Ronso and Akiko Mizoguchi

here the original post this one stems from. I advice reading that one first if you haven't. Please note I am no expert on this, and this is a post to give an overview of the different topics treated. There might be some inaccuracies.

The Yaoi Debates - 1992

In 1992, a “confrontation between women yaoi fans and gay men about the relation between the representation of homosexual love and society’s prejudice against gay men in real life” that happened in the japanese feminist magazine Bessatsu CHOISIR. 

The Yaoi Ronso (or Yaoi Debates) were a series of letters published in the magazine between Masaki Sato (a gay activist), who criticized the genre, and the female readers, who defended it. Masaki Sato criticized yaoi for showing examples of homosexual life that could negatively impact young gay men who read them. Meanwhile female readers argued back that shonen ai/yaoi was not meant to depict reality, or real men. This exchange of letters ended with Masaki Sato and some of the female readers agreeing in some points, and Sato suggesting that instead of escaping from reality these stories should make reality easier to live in. 

Up to that point, in most of the 20 years of academic studies regarding the subject, it has been argued that the men depicted in these stories chould be thought as a third gender free of societal expectations, object of love in a pure form. A means for female sexual liberation and exploration, made possible thanks to its detachement to reality. Lots of theories at the time said that women used these “boys” to avoid having to become “women”, and the expectations that came with the title. Maintaing the “boyhood” from childhood that is lost as they become women. 

After the Debates, female academics started evaluating the power of the symbol of male homosexual love fantasies. And so started a discussion about the difference between reality and fantasy, getting to question topics such as depictions of rape being easily allowed. All of this as part of gender studies and manga studies.

One of the more discussed things in academic studies regarding shoujo and BL is its heterosexual female public. The shonen-ai/yaoi/BL has served as a medium for homosexuals to find each other but also for heterosexual women to flee society’s heteronormative and gender pressures, heavily associated with fantasy. One example of this is the magazine Barazoku (meaning Rose tribe, bara is a term highly associated with gay content). Which featured a column where letters of female readers would be published. At first these letters expressed the desires of these women to marry gay men, or become gay men themselves to enjoy a freedom they believed gay men enjoyed (they would usually be referred to as okoge or fag hags). Despite its problematic nature, the chief editor of the magazine went against advice and requests to stop publishing such letters. From there on started to appear letters from lesbian women (which ended up being the only kind of letters that woul d be featured) who, interested in depictions of homosexual love would realize their own desire for the same sex. This column was then changed to the name Yurizoku (the Lily Tribe, yuri is a term highly associated with lesbian content). 

The 1990s were also when there was a “gay boom” in japan (lgbt movie festivals and other things started happening). Many of the manga magazines that published BL would feature articles that introduced the japanese gay lifestyle to its women readers. Like, gay bars, Shinjuku Ni-Choume (the gay district of Tokyo), or art popular among gays or even foreign gay communities. Gay men and women has been learned from each other in this way for a number of years now. 

Academics noticed the impact of the Yaoi Ronso on BL as they started to observe gay characters who reached a happy ending emerging. The Yaoi Ronso had a definite impact on the evolution of the gerne as it started to take into account that (having meant to or not) they had a power of influence that affected real people. 

sources Kayo Takeuchi James Welker Wim Lunsing

However, Wim Lunsing brings an important point to the table:

“Gay manga are not essentially different from BLB manga.”

It is true that BL is the most popular form in which we find gay stories in Japan. However, gay comics had existed for almost the same amount of time as yaoi. 

Short introduction to Male Love (ML)

ML, Gei Komi and Bara are the terms with which gay content made by and for gay men are refered to. Gengoroh Tagame is one of the most prominent figures of it. Before he started publishing his very sexual BDSM comics, the beauty ideal that was pursued was the bishonen aesthetic. However, Tagame’s characters where big, muscle-y, fat, hairy men, with a clear influence by Tom of Finland, and its popularity changed the tastes of japanese gay men.

Gengoroh Tagame also started writing slice of life manga in an effort to educate japanese society about gay life and LGBT issues. He is the author of the manga My Brother’s Husband (which was later turned into a 4 episode series).

Another notable manga is Until I Met my Husband, based on an autobiographic essay by Ryousuke Nanansaki.

Akiko Mizoguchi, the Rape Fantasy Expert - An Extra

Akiko Mizoguchi is a notable researcher of BL studies. She is the expert in regards to the analysis of depictions of rape, however she writes mostly in japanese, and my comprehesion of it is very limited for academic readings. 

She has wrote an extensive book: Theorizing BL As a Transformative Genre: Male-Male Fictions by and for Women - which is currently being translated to english.

Summary:

Identifying Mari Mori's 1961 short novel as the origin of the genre and the 1970's-1980's "Beautiful Boy" manga within the girls' (shojo) manga as the precursor, Dr. Akiko Mizoguchi discusses how the commercial BL genre has transformed into an unprecedented genre with feminist and queer activist potential. Recent commercial BL genre has produced stories that portray strong female characters and gay-identified characters who come out and engage in other realistic negotations. Mizoguchi argues that while BL represents beautiful male characters at the center, for veteran women fans and authors, it functions as a female sexualized discursive space in which they exchange pleasure to the extent that these women can be called "virtual gay men" and "virtual lesbians."

source

Mizoguchi is a lesbian woman trying to bring a new type of analysis of BL taking lesbianism into account. 

Other academic authors with a lot on yaoi manga/BL are Mark McLelland and Thomas Baudinette. 

Conclusion (of sorts)

Even though The Yaoi Debates ended, it is still being had up to these days. Both in academics and within the BL fandom. If we change the exhange of letters in magazines for the internet, we find ourselves in a similar situation. I hope that through this post the Debates have become clearer and easier to understand for those who didn’t know about it. 

I close with this quote from one of the text I read for this post:

“The implication that gay sex is objectified for the purpose of the sexual liberation of women surely is a queer use of male homosexuality par excellence.”

Together with a longer version of the previous quote:

“It rather seems that gay men like Satō have difficulty with the idea that women may look at them as sex objects. Gay manga are not essentially different from BLB manga.”

Make with it what you will, but it is indeed food for thought.

Closing Remarks

For those curious ones, wanting to look into how the gay community of Japan was in the 70′s, check out Funeral Parade of Roses. And if anyone is interested in male prostitution in Japan, check out Boys for Sale (if you can, if not here’s an interview).

If you’ve made it to this point, I hope you found this post interesting or helpful in whichever way it may be needed. I have mainly summarized what little I know on the topic but if anybody is curious about the big details in an academic way, here is the best article on it I have been able to find: The Yaoi Ronso (by Wim Lunsing).

Edit: this post has been updated to correct some mistakes. If you happen to see any more please do point them out