#and then i saw CB's FACE i remember the smile i saw big smile and i remember seeing it clearly but fuck man its fading from my head

[stars-hearts-gems]

SWSH postwickshipping fanfiction part 4 (Champion's Ball)

Events follow THIS (CB #2) directly. Go on and read that first. (summary: Not long after the Pokemon Championship ends with Gloria declared the new Galar Champion, the annual Champion’s Ball is held at the Rose of the Rondelands Hotel in Wyndon. The ball is extra special this year as it’s a Champion’s Inaugural Ball, the time to introduce a new champion to Galar and to the world.)

Further reading: Champion's Ball #1

Words: ~2000

✨👗👑🌼💕💐💋

Had Gloria been closer to him as she tripped over her cape and careened off the stage, Bede would have made good on his earlier promise to be the Champion’s knight in shining armor. But, as it was, all Bede could do was watch.

Gloria fell out of the spotlight and into the darkened crowd like an uncoordinated duck diving into water. Her microphone bounced off the stage floor with a resounding thunk, and gasps reverberated through the hall.

Bede ran a few paces to the front of the stage alongside Leon, Raihan and Oleana. All four squinted out into the audience blindly; a second later, a spotlight operator trained his light on the area where Gloria had fallen.

The scene that met Bede’s eyes was quite different from how he had envisioned this night playing out. There, amidst a gaggle of well-dressed onlookers, was Gloria, tangled in her cape and missing her crown, looking horrified but miraculously unhurt. And kneeling next to her was none other than her dark-haired friend… what was his name? Han? Herb? Bede didn’t remember.

“Are you hurt, Gloria?” called Leon. 

Gloria shook her head silently, her face blooming red.

“Still got all your limbs?” quipped Raihan, trying in vain to diffuse the awkward situation. “Back up, folks, give them some room. Are your brains scrambled? Your Champion health insurance doesn’t kick in until tomorrow, you know.”

The crowd laughed weakly. People were craning their necks to get a view of what was happening on the floor.

“This young man broke her fall!” declared a tall man in the front row in a booming voice. “Bloody glad he did! That could have killed her!”

The crowd murmured appreciatively. 

“Oh, I’m sure it wouldn’t have been that serious,” said Oleana, looking pained. “If you’re really alright, Champion, completely unhurt, why don’t you pick yourself up and we’ll move on with the ceremony?”

Bede turned toward Oleana in outrage. 

“Can’t you give her a minute? She’s just had a terrible fright!”

Oleana ignored him. Her eyes darted toward the many television cameras now pointed at Gloria, who was getting shakily to her feet with assistance from… Chip. Yes. Chip. That’s his name, Bede thought, his heart blooming with jealousy as he noticed the boy’s hand on Gloria’s back. Stupid, stupid Chip.

“Don’t you worry, young lady,” boomed the tall man. “I myself have made many missteps on big stages -- never directly off them, but that’s beside the point. I’ve lived to tell the tale. Trust me, no one will remember this in a few months!” 

Gloria smiled weakly. Bede tried to catch her eye, but wasn’t successful.

“Yes, yes, Mayor Hardstone,” said Oleana eagerly. “Please, won’t you escort the Champion back onto the stage? And perhaps we can get this derailed evening back on track...” she added quietly.

“Don’t be silly, the honor should go to this young man,” Mayor Hardstone said genially, slapping Chip on the shoulder. “He was the one who lunged to catch her while the rest of us just looked on in dumb amazement.”

Bede glared, torn between anger and concern.

“Alright, well, I suppose,” Oleana said. “Come along, you two. Yes, yes, the show’s over. Well, I don’t mean the actual show -- I mean, well, never mind. Can we turn that spot off?”

The bright light snapped off, and Bede saw the shadows of Chip and Gloria walk around to the stage stairs. Chip initially seemed to believe that that was as far as he would go, hanging back away from the stage, but Gloria pulled him out into the light. The room gave a raucous round of applause at her reappearance -- the clapping and cheering was the loudest it had been all night, and continued on and on. 

“Thank you, everyone,” Gloria said sheepishly, once the din had died down again and she was handed back her microphone. “And as I was about to say before I … well, you know… As I was going to say, I’d like to thank my best friend, Hop, for always being there for me. I couldn’t have gotten to where I am today without his support, in and out of the battle arena!”

Bede’s frown deepened as he watched Chip -- er, Hop -- grin and wave out at the applauding crowd. 

“Thank you, ladies and gentlemen!” cried Raihan, back on form as emcee. “Now, may I invite you to run, not walk, toward our absolutely decadent smorgasbord of fine food and drink available for your eating pleasure. And don’t forget to save room for a slice of that magnificent Charizard-shaped cake! I heard that it was so realistic, Leon tried to put it in a Pokeball!”

The crowd laughed. Bede rolled his eyes and glowered over at Gloria and Hop, who were standing very close and whispering to each other.

“We’ll be back in about 30 minutes to start dancing!” announced Raihan. “But for now, buon appetito!” 

An upbeat soundtrack accompanied the crowd’s mass movement toward the tables of food stationed around the edges of the room, which had been flooded with warm light.

Bede sought to salvage the evening by prying Gloria away from Hop. 

“Why don’t we go get you something delicious to eat, to calm your nerves?” Bede said to Gloria. “I can only imagine that if I had just fallen off a stage, I would want to drown my sorrows in chocolate cake.”

“Oh, sure, Bede,” said Gloria. “We can all go.”

“Or, better yet, you can go and get her something to eat,” Hop said to Bede. “We can’t expect the Champion to line up with everyone else. We’ll wait here.”

“Don’t you have your own date to bother? Or are you here all alone?” Bede said acidly.

“Whoa there, pal,” said Hop, eyebrows raised. “You remember Marnie from Spikemuth? We’re here together, I just don’t know where she’s gone off to. No need to act all –”

“Guys, guys,” Gloria said, holding up her hands. “Actually, you’re right, Hop, I don’t really want to get in the mix with everyone else because they’re all bound to be like, ‘Are you okay?’ and stuff. And I would really just rather forget about how I just… well, you know. So, could you actually get me something to eat, Bede? I’d love a fruit tart.”

Bede ground his teeth. He felt like the whole evening was collapsing around him. He’d really been hoping for some alone time with Gloria, a chance to show her how the greatness of Bede so outshined everything about Hop.

Bede’s answer suddenly appeared in the form of a young woman with a microphone and a man holding a large camera. 

“Champion! May we steal your friend for a moment?” the reporter asked, turning to Hop. “We’d like to interview you about what it’s like to be friends with the Champion, and of course about your act of heroism tonight!”

Bede rolled his eyes, but smirked hopefully.

“Oh, uh, no thanks,” said Hop. “There’s really nothing to say about me.”

“Certainly, there is!” prodded the reporter. “I even heard that you were with the Champion at Rose Tower during the Eternatus incident? Our viewers would love it if you would confirm that for us. Everyone’s dying to hear all about you, I promise!”

Bede thought he saw a hungry look in Hop’s eyes as he contemplated the offer. The boy had perked up at the reporter’s recognition of his involvement with Eternatus. Clearly, thought Bede, the kid was feeling under-appreciated.

“Oh, go on, Hop,” said Bede, causing both Hop and Gloria to turn toward him in surprise. “I’m sure the people would love to hear about all the grand adventures you and Gloria have had -- what are you waiting for?”

Hop glared at Bede for a second. He was clearly torn. But then, Hop’s face brightened and he turned back toward the reporter. 

“Alright, let’s do this!” he said, and the three strode off, leaving Gloria and Bede alone.

Bede turned to Gloria, placing a hand on her shoulder. 

“Alright, the evening is ours,” he said grandly. “Let’s get you some food.”

He saw Gloria hesitate, looking off toward the crowded tables with a worried look.

“And then we can hide backstage while we eat? For some peace and quiet?” Bede suggested.

“Yeah, that sounds like a plan,” she said. But Bede noticed she cast a look at Hop's retreating back even as she said it. He bristled.

"I mean, if you don't want to, that's fine," he said.

"No, I do, it's just..." Gloria said. Bede waited, but she seemed to have abandoned her sentence.

"Well, it would be nice if, as my date to this ball, you were able to spend at least a LITTLE time with just me," he said. "Or did you just say you'd come to this with me to make that kid jealous?"

"Oh, of course not!" Gloria said, her eyes snapping back to Bede's face. She looked stricken, and Bede instantly felt guilty for snapping.

"I'll get you a plate, I know what you like," he said, and before she could respond, he turned and walked briskly toward the heavily laden tables. The sight of her furrowed brow made Bede feel sick.

✨✨✨✨

~ Later ~

As the clock neared midnight, the last of the party guests clustered around the edges of the ballroom. 

The room looked even more cavernous to Gloria when it was empty. She couldn’t believe she’d face-flopped onto the carpet in front of all those people just hours ago.

She, Hop, Bede and Marnie were sitting on the edge of the stage watching the crowd thin out. Phones glowed as people hailed rides, some staggering away leaning on their friends.

Marnie’s brother Piers sidled up to the group.

“Alright there, mates? Good party, eh?” he gently cuffed Marnie in the head. “Look, me and some of the other gym leaders are headed back to Raihan’s apartment to keep things going for another hour or two. I’ve got some money here for a Corviknight taxi that’ll take you straight home, Marn. And I can fork over some for the rest of you as well, if you need it. I know it must be past your bedtimes!”

Gloria briefly caught Hop's eye. Neither particularly relished Piers’ insinuation that they were still children. But it was Marnie who spoke first.

“Quit it, you know we’re coming with you,” she said. “You can’t keep partying without the Champion, for god’s sakes, it’s her big night! And if she goes, we go.”

All eyes turned to Gloria.

Gloria's tiredness weighed on her, as did her residual embarrassment from falling off the stage. And as much as she hated to think it, she was somewhat eager to get away from the sullen, quiet Bede who sat beside her, sulking. She wasn't quite sure what she'd done wrong.

"Yeah, I want to come," she said, surprising herself.

"Suit yourself," Piers said with a roll of his eyes, but a smile on his face. "But I'd be amiss if I didn't warn you all: No alcohol, and believe me, I'll be watching. And you should really consider heading home by two at the latest. I know I can't really make rules for the rest of you, but that's when Marnie's Corviknight taxi will be arriving and I suggest you all do the same."

Marnie opened her mouth to protest, but Gloria cut in.

"Sounds fine, Piers. Thanks for inviting us," she said.

Piers nodded in approval of Gloria's diplomacy. "We'll meet out front in 10, okay?" he said. "It'll be Leon, Raihan, myself, Nessa, Milo, Sonia, and probably Gordie if his mother doesn't make him go home early."

Piers left. Gloria turned to the others.

"Well, I know Marnie's coming regardless, but you guys know you can go home if you want, I'm not trying to force anyone to stay up all night if they don't want to," she said.

Hop and Bede answered nearly in unison.

"I'm definitely coming," said each boy emphatically.

✨💃🏻🌸🌿❤️✨

[wikifoxnews]

Who was Alison Russo Elling ( EMT stabbed to death in Queens as she was grabbing food ) Wiki, Bio, Age, Crime, Arrest, Incident Details, Investigations and More Facts

Alison Russo Elling Biography                                Alison Russo Elling Wiki

A EMT was stabbed to death by a maniac on a Queens street Thursday afternoon in an unprovoked attack that took place on the way to a meal, authorities said.

Lt. Alison Russo Elling, a 61-year-old department veteran who was a World Trade Center rescue worker on Sept. 11, 2001, was stabbed more than 20 times around 2:20 p.m. by an assailant between 20th Avenue and 41st Street, he said. In gruesome crime scene surveillance footage, Russo-Elling was thrown to the ground by a knife-wielding lunatic who repeatedly stabbed her as she lay helplessly on the concrete. He was on duty at the time and was about a half-block from Station 49 on the sidewalk when he was attacked, NYPD Chief Investigator James Essig said. Officials gave no details of what sparked the violence, but authorities said the attack was "unmotivated".

Investigations

"At this stage of the investigation, there appears to have been no prior contact between them," an FDNY source said. "He just approached her, accelerated, and then stabbed her." The 25-year-old veteran was taken to Mount Sinai Hospital in critical condition but could not be rescued, police said.

Suspect

The suspected criminal, 34, was arrested after being chased by a Good Samaritan and barricaded in his apartment next door, Essig said. On the third floor of the apartment, police managed to convince him and take him into custody, Essig said. A person who lived in the area near the Astoria-area crime scene said they felt "terrible" for the officer. "God, what's going on in this world, why is this such a quiet place," said Connie Syrigos. “It's all families here, honest people, hard working people, and that has never happened before. When I saw it, I was very surprised." Murdered EMT Alison Russo-Elling was a 24-year veteran, planned to retire in 6 months https://t.co/TVI4Nag2LY pic.twitter.com/MC7H3phgGJ — New York Post (@nypost) September 30, 2022 Acting FDNY Commissioner Laura Kavanagh called Russo's death "heartbreaking," adding that she was stabbed in a "barbaric and totally unprovoked attack." "We've lost one of our heroes," Mayor Eric Adams said at a news conference. The suspect, whose name has not been released, was arrested in the 114th arrondissement late Thursday afternoon. No charges were announced. Camilla Groth, 50, who lives in the same neighborhood as the crime scene, called the boy lonely and "weird" and said she first noticed him when she was about two years old. "Lonely... Kinda weird but totally non-violent," described Groth, her neighbor across the street. I didn't want to meet him or say hello or anything. "I've never seen him with another person. He was always alone when I saw him," he added. Violence against paramedics is not uncommon in the Big Apple. Five years ago, Yadira Arroyo was shot dead by her own ambulance after being robbed in the Bronx. The man accused of killing her, Jose Gonzalez, was found fit to stand trial earlier this month. His trial date is Jan. 3, 2023, CBS News reported Thursday. A 25-year-old paramedic from Richmond University Medical Center was fatally shot in an ambulance by a drunk man being transported to Staten Island in 2019. A 20-year-old paramedic was attacked on the spot that same year. Another brave paramedic was brutally attacked on duty last year by a crazed teenager who allegedly bit him in the face. The flag for Station 49, where Russo worked, was lowered to half-staff on Thursday night as first responders gathered outside the station to mourn the loss of their colleague. EMT Captain Mike Daddona told the Post outside the hospital Thursday that he and Russo grew up working together. He remembered Russo for his kindness. "Great sense of humor. He always greeted you with a smile," he said. "No matter what was going on, he had a smile on his face." In a joint statement, FDNY Firefighters Association President Andrew Ansbro and FDNY Firefighters Association President Lt. James McCarthy in a joint statement saying they stand in solidarity with "our brothers and sisters" at the ministry. "The death of Alison Russo is a tragic reminder of the dangers faced by all members of the FDNY and the uniformed services," they said. "His senseless murder hurts every member of the FDNY." Read the full article

[blackdragons-cb]

Hongjoong's words to his family

Can i just take the time to appreciate my family? You all make me happy and without each and every one of you, i would never be who i am today. Within the centuries i have lived, i never really knew what it was like to have a family of my own. But now that i have you guys, it's like a dream came true.

Kun: you are one of the oldest if not the oldest, yet you are the most sweetest boy in the entire world. I just really hope you don't get hurt making anymore crowns.

Doyoung:you are new to the family and i hope your brothers accepted you with open arms.you are sweet child that deserve all the love that you desire. I hope one day that you will find someone to give you the amount of love that i will give you

Winwin:my sweet and innocent babie. I hope you know that when i first saw you, i just had to adopt you. Who wouldn't want to adopt an adorable child that gives one of the best hugs in the world. Keep that innocence of yours because the world is a cruel place and i don't want to see you corrupted by it

Jungwoo:Another new child to the family. However when you asked for you and Doyoung to share a room, i just knew that you two would make it together. You're a sweet child Jungwoo, and just like Winwin don't let the world corrupt you

Hendery:Oh hendery,my sweet and creative Hendery. You are just such a big ball of fluff, i get soft everytime i hear you call me papa. Even though i was kinda disappointed to hear about the twigs in the backyard, i was also happy to see you play in the secret room. You have a spark in your eye that makes you special,never lose it. For your future will be special and you will make me the proudest papa in the world

Last but not least my first child, Jeno. You have grown a lot. You have a boyfriend who i hope truly loves you and you have already had your first kiss. I was shook when i first heard about it and was trying my hardest to get peter pan to take you to neverland. But when i sat down and thought about it, i was just really afraid that you would talk to me less or want to be with your boyfriend more than me...but you proved me wrong. You would be the first one to talk to me and it would bring a smile on my face. Nono i hope you know that without you, i would've never became a father of 6(including you)

To hyungwon my love,the fact that you haven't murdered me yet for adopting so many kids still amazes me. I remember meeting you for the first time. That sassy attitude,the way you would look at me while questioning how in the world did you end up here. Later on in life we lost Youngmin but that made us closer than ever. I still laugh at when you thought Felix really killed me sometimes but it warms my heart knowing that you would hurt anyone that hurted me. Truly i don't deserve you or my children. I have done terrible things in my past centuries but this life that im living right now, is making up for those things. So to start off and make this family our official thing, Chae Hyungwon will you make me the happiest man in the entire world and marry me?

💜💚: @k-pop-cafe

👦: @hybrid-ateez-straykids-nct

Tags: @yanlee ​(og) @hybrid-kpop-cb @ares-bc ​ @badass-girlz @bloodlustbots ​ ​ @babyhj1sung  @bunny-woong ​ @catwoman-lisa ​ @cb-museclub ​ @daenerysolar ​ @darkfaeskz ​ @demon-nct ​ @urhexgirls @snow-siblings ​​ @hybridxgirls ​ @heathenxbots ​ @hellbound-cb ​ @hereticsoojin ​ @hernameisangel-oc ​ @hunter-chaeyoung ​ @idol-academy ​ @incubusseungwoo ​  @storybook-nct ​ @kaanghana ​@skz-cb @killerbots ​ @lilith-doyeon ​ @mafia-chae @moonlightchn ​ @your-yanderes @mutantsbot ​ @originalscb ​ @powerpuff-3ye-cb ​ @punchline-yuju ​@got7sinsbot @ateez-treasure9au-chatbot ​ @collegebf-exo @e-bots @xxmarkleex @oc-twins-cb @domyukhei @subby-superm @uridealbf-cb @uridealgf-cb @iceskater-sana

[dreatine]

Fic: Family,Cookies and Luck

Title: Family,Cookies,and Luck

Author: dreatine

Rating: G

Pairing/Characters: Matt Simmons and the Simmonses girls

Disclaimer: I own nothing. CBS owns all....

Summary: Matt has to supervise his daughters selling Girl Scout cookies with some unexpected help

CMBingo 2020 Square: The Simmonses

Thanks: Sharon and Edgar for making sure this is coherent...I hope

Note: This is kind of based on my experiences selling Girl Scout cookies when I was little.

Note 2: Find the hidden Max Brenner reference( meaning the Rachael Leigh Cook reference)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hey, Matt!" Luke said,as they were getting ready to go home. "Anything planned for the weekend?"

Matt flung his bag over his shoulder. "Yeah. I'm the chaperone for Lily and Chloe's Girl Scout cookie sale."

"Awww..." Tara and JJ cooed together, laughing.

"Did you know that last year the Girl Scouts sold over 200 million boxes of cookies with Thin Mints being the most popular?" Spencer said, grabbing a couple of books off his desk.

"I didn't know that, Spence." Matt replied. "I know Lily and Chloe are not going to sell THAT many tomorrow, for sure."

Emily and Rossi came up. "So, what are we all doing this weekend?"

"Matt here is going to be the cookie lady," Luke teased.

"What?"

Matt explained. "I'm helping out Chloe and Lily selling Girl Scout cookies at the store."

"That sounds fun." Rossi replied, sarcastically.

"Nice support there, Rossi." Tara said, patting him on the shoulder.

"Hey, sellling cookies with the kids outside is not my idea of fun." Rossi replied. "Why don't I just buy all the boxes and save you the time?"

"Thanks for the offer, Rossi." Matt answered, "But, we have to sell them like this because it promotes responsibility, time management and whatever else the handbook said."

As they were walking to the elevators, Emily asked. " So, how long do they have to sell?"

"Two hours only. From 11-1. The girls are Daisies, which are the youngest group, so no more than 2 hours with 2 chaperones." Matt answered.

"How did you get suckered into it?" Luke inquired as they piled into the elevator.

"Last year, Kristy did it but because she's busy with Rosemary, so I'm the lucky one." Matt said. "Usually, it's one parent for their child or in my case, two children,  during the one shift."

JJ asked. "What store?"

"Ralphs at Elm and Sherman." he answered, the doors closing, the team nodding.

********

Saturday morning, Ralphs:

"Yeah, Sheila. no, no...it's okay." Matt assured on the phone. "I can manage. I'm sorry to hear Mary Anne is sick. I hope she feels better."

"What's wrong, Daddy?" Lily asked, smoothing down the sign as Chloe neatly arranged the boxes.

He put his phone in his pocket. "Mary Anne is sick, so it's just the three of us today."

"Yay!"

Matt smiled. "All right, girls. Let's go over the rules." Lily and Chloe gathered in front of him." Chloe, you did a nice job of stacking up the boxes. And Lily, the sign looks great." the girls' beamed at him. "Now, remember, stay close to the table and ask people as the come OUT of the store if they would like to buy cookies. Not as they're going in." they nodded. "Now, what do we say?"

"Would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?" they said in unison.

"Good. If they say yes, direct them to the table." Matt said, "And if they say no, what do we say?"

"Thank you. Have a nice day."

"Very good. Always be polite., no matter what." He put the cashbox on the table. "You have the cookie names down, right?"

"Yes."

"Great." he clapped his hands. "Now, let's sell some cookies!"

*******

Spencer's apartment, Saturday morning:

"These pancakes are delicious, Max!" Spencer said, stuffing another into his mouth.

Max blushed. "Thanks, babe. It's the vanilla and the cinnamon." She stood up and dropped her plate into the sink. Coming around to Spencer, she wrapped her arms around his neck. "So, what's the plan for today?" she asked, her breath tickling his neck, causing a shiver down his spine.

Wrapping his hands around her forearms, he replied. "Well, I had an idea."

"Ooooh...what's going on in that big, beautiful brain of yours?" she asked, kissing his head.

Blushing, he answered, "I thought maybe, we could go to the store."

"Okay..." she dragged out, confusion in her voice.

Laughing, Spencer kissed her forearm. " I didn't finish, beautiful."

"Go ahead." she whispered in his ear.

"God, you need to stop doing that,  I'm losing my train of thought." Spencer whined, Max giggled. "What was I saying?"

"You wanted to go to the store." Max said. "Sounds like there's a reason."

He nodded. "Lily and Chloe, Matt's girls, are selling Girl Scout cookies today at the store. And I thought that we could stop by to support them?" he turned to her, questioningly.

Max beamed. "That sounds wonderful! I love Girl Scout cookies."she kissed him on the lips. "You, Dr.Reid, are a great friend."

Turning crimson, Spencer wrapped his arms around her waist and yanked her into his lap. "You, Ms.Brenner, are an amazing girlfriend." he responded, cupping her face to kiss her.

*****

LeMontagne Household, Saturday morning:

"Cher?" Will asked. "We're running out of things, bread and eggs for sure. I think we need to go to the store, soon."

"I know." JJ walked into the kitchen. "How about we go today with the boys?"

"I can go by myself." Will looked up to see JJ smiling sheepishly. "I know that smile. What do you have in mind?"

"Well, I was thinking we could go to Ralphs on Elm and Sherman to support Matt and the girls who are selling cookies today?" she smiled.

Chuckling, Will answered. "All right, Let's go, The boys would love to see the girls again."

JJ leaned in to kiss him. "Great. I'll get them ready."

****** Meanwhile, back at Ralphs:

"Daddy, no one is buying." Chloe whined, disappointment on her face.

"I know, sweetie." Matt sighed. He knew this would be hard but didn't realize how difficult it would be. They'd been there for close to a half hour and no one wanted to buy. He thought with his two precious girls, that customers would be excited to buy from two cute little girls but they kept giving excuses not to buy, some more outrageous than the next. He thought two little girls would make it easy to sell because they wouldn't be turned down but it still happened. He couldn't imagine how the older Scouts did it. Probably near impossible. 'Maybe I should have had Rossi buy them all.' he mused.

"Daddy! Uncle Luke is here!!" yelled, Lily.

Swiveling his head, Matt spotted Luke coming up. "Hey, man." he slapped his hand. "What brings you here?" he asked, surprised.

"Roxy needed food." Luke answered. Turning to the girls, he said. "Hi, girls. How's it going?"

"Not good." Chloe replied, sadly.

"We haven't sold anything." Lily chimed in.

"I'm sorry." Luke said. "I'll buy some on my way out."

"Really?" Lily asked, excitedly.

"Yup." Luke looked at Matt, who had a curious look on his face. "What?"

"Roxy needed food?" Matt asked, warily. "That's the best you could come up with? Isn't there a Petco by your house?"

Swallowing, Luke grabbed a basket. "Yes, but they have better prices here.And I have a coupon." Turning to the girls." I'll be right back."

With that, Luke entered the store, Matt shaking his head.

********

20 minutes later:

After Luke left with 5 pounds of dog food and 5 boxes of cookies, things started to pick up for the sale. Four customers stopped by and bought at least 2 boxes a piece, causing excitement from Lily and Chloe. Matt loved seeing his girls happy and they were doing a good job remembering cookie names as well as the prices with Matt making change. As he was marking down which types of cookies had been sold, he heard Lily say, "Aunt Emily!"

"Hi, girls!" Emily waved. "How's it going?"

"Great!" Chloe answered. "We've sold 20 boxes."

"Wow."

"Uncle Luke bought the most. He bought 5!" Lily replied.

"Did he?" Emily looked up at Matt, who was eyeing her with suspicion." Well, since I'm here. I'll buy some too."

'Yay!" Lily jumped up and down.

"Emily.."Matt warned.

She shrugged. "What? I had to go to the store to pick some wine for a romantic dinner with Andrew." she winked.

"And there were no liquor stores around your place?"

"Not with these low prices. " Emily picked up a basket. "Besides, Keeley loves cookies." the girls cheered.

Matt shook his head. "Emily.."

She threw up her hands in defense. ' Hey, I'm the boss. If I want cookies, I'm getting cookies." she grabbed a basket.  "See you in a bit, girls."

"Bye."

No sooner had Emily went into the store that Matt saw a familiar face walking across the parking lot. 'Tara' he sighed.

"Hey,Tara!" he yelled.

She waved at them. " Hey, Matt. Hey, girls."

"Hi, Aunt Tara." they responded in unison.

"How's business?"

"Good. We sold 20 boxes." Lily answered.

Tara smiled. "That's great."

"Uncle Luke was here and Aunt Emily is in the store." Chloe said.

"Aaah.." Tara answered, eyebrows raised.

"What brings you here this morning?" asked Matt, smiling.

"Weekly grocery shopping."

"Uh,huh." Matt replied, looking at Tara disbelievingly. "Across town?"

She shrugged. "They have excellent produce here. Best carrots."

"Right."

"Well, girls, Good Luck." Tara got a basket. "I'll be back to buy some cookies!"

"To go with your carrots, right?" Matt asked, teasingly.

"Of course. Balance is key." Tara waved, entering the store.

*****

Hour later:

After Tara and Emily, who both bought more cookies than they needed, using the explanations of 'for Keeley' and ' for my Psych colleagues', the two women left and traffic dropped. There was a sale here and there but the bulk of the boxes sold were from his team.  He loved his team for doing this for his girls but part of him knew it wouldn't always be this easy for them. But, that was a conversation for later.

Checking his watch, he realized they had just under one hour left. He wondered if anyone else on the team would stop by. 'Let's see, still have David,Penelope, JJ, Spencer..'

"Would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?" Lily asked.

"You're cute." the lady said. "But, my granddaughter already sells them I'm sorry."

"Thank you, anyways."

Matt smiled, marveling at how the girls were still polite despite being turned down. He was so proud of them. As he was checking over the cookie sheet, he heard Chloe yell. "Aunt Penelope!"

"Oh! Lookie here! My beautiful little daisies!" Penelope cooed over them, wrapping them up in a hug.

"Good Afternoon, Penelope." Matt offered, grinning. "What's up? Casual shopping?"

"I needed to buy some snacks for my group." she explained, perusing the boxes.  "And everyone likes Girl Scout cookies."

"You're boyfriend was here about an hour ago." Matt teased.

Penelope snapped her head up. "He's not my boyfriend."

"Not yet." Matt smirked. " How many dates have you been on?"

"Four." she mumbled.

"Sounds like a boyfriend to me." Matt said, grinning ear to ear.

"Shush! Mister!" Penelope shook her head. "I'm here to buy cookies from my angels."

"Which ones do you want, Aunt Penelope?"

"Let me see.." she scanned the sheet. "I'll take 3 Thin Mints, 3 Samoas, 2 Trefoils, 2 Tagalongs, 2 Do-si-dos. I love peanut butter." Penelope offered, as the girls collected the boxes.

"Twelve?"

"Yup."

"Penelope.." Matt drew out. Penelope hit him, "Hush, My group is big and they need fuel." Facing the girls, she smiled. "Now, how much?"

"How much, Daddy?" Chloe asked.

"60 dollars."

"Wow!!"  and  'That's a lot." both girls screamed.

"Anything for my daisy angels." Penelope grinned.

"Thank you, Aunt Penelope."

"Anytime, my beauties!" Penelope put the cookies in her bag. "And you, Mister, send my love to Kristy and the baby and the boys." she kissed his cheek. "I'll see you later."

Thank you, Penelope." Matt said, kissing her back.

"Bye, my loves!"

"Bye, Aunt Penelope."

'So, who's left?' Matt mused.

********************

12;30 pm.  Half hour to go:

"Daddy, we've almost ran out." Lily said, arranging the remainder of the boxes. They had just had a handful of boxes of each variety left.

"I see, girls." Matt replied, marking them down on the sheet. The last 45 minutes had been busy. Not only did selling pick up from strangers at the store but like he thought, two more members of his team showed up for support. David came a little bit after Penelope, saying he needed some cookies for Ringo and his poker buddies, while JJ and her family, came by under the pretense of needing groceries which Matt asked why not go near home when Will gave up the game by saying they wanted to support the girls. JJ bought half a dozen and Rossi bought only 10 after Matt had to stop him from buying the entire inventory. It wasn't an easy thing but Matt did it. He said it wasn't fair to the girls who were trying to develop responsibility and luckily, Rossi relented.For now.

"Thank you. Have a nice day." Chloe replied, as an elderly couple bought two.

"How many, Chloe?" Mattt inquired.

"Two. One Trefolis, one Thin Mints." she said, as Matt marked off the respective boxes on the sheet.

"Look, Daddy! Uncle Spencer and Aunt Max!" Lily exclaimed, waving.

'I knew it.' Matt thought to himself. He knew out of anyone on his team, Spencer would show up. He was so good with supporting kids and their activities. He knew about the endless soccer games and school plays Spencer attended on behalf of his godchildren.

"Hi, Lily. Hi, Chloe." Spencer greeted them with a wave.

"Hello, Matt."Max said. "Hello, girls!"

"Hi, Uncle Spencer and Aunt Max." Lily called, causing both Max and Spencer to smile at their names.

"Hey, guys. What brings you by?" Matt asked, knowingly.

"We wanted to buy some cookies."Spencer replied flat out.

Matt laughed, causing confusion. "Thanks, Spence." he clapped him on the back.

"What for?"

"For being honest." Matt explained. "The others came by, with varying excuses for coming by but you were straight up honest about it."

Max giggled, squeezing Spencer's hand. "Truthfully, for a moment, we thought about making up an excuse but decided to be upfront about wanting to help."

"Who else came by?" Spencer asked, looking over the cookie selection.

"The entire team."

"Really?"

Matt nodded. "Yeah. And the excuses they gave were so funny,"

"What were they?"Mas inquired, pointing out a couple of cookies to Spencer.

"Let's see. Rossi needed some for Ringo and Emily said there was cheaper wine here than anywhere else. And Tara needed cookies to balance out her produce."

"You're kidding me."Max chuckled, as did Spencer.

Matt smiled. "It was funny to say the least." he watched as Chloe and Lily were telling Spencer all the varieties with him listening intently to everything they were telling him. Max watched smiling lovingly. "That's great that they came by. Families do that."

Matt agreed. " They do."

"Babe, have you decided which ones you want?"

Spencer wrapped his arm around her. "Well, thanks to Lily and Chloe who did an amazing job of explaining the types to me, I've decided on..." the girls beamed at him. " I want the Thin Mints and Samoas. And the toffee ones for sure. What do you want, love?"

"I love peanut butter, So, I'll take the Tagalongs and Do-si-dos."

"Good choice." Spencer said. "Here's 25 dollars." he handed the money to Lily.

"Thank you, Uncle Spencer." Lily took the money to the cashbox.

"Here are the boxes, Aunt Max."

Max put them in her bag. "Thank you, Chloe."

"Thanks for stopping by." Matt offered.

"Anytime."Max replied as Spencer carried her bag.

"See you on Monday." Spencer said, again wrapping an arm around Max, waving goodbye.

"Thank you, Uncle Spencer and Aunt Max!" the girls screamed, waving wildly.

Matt smiled, watching them walk away. Max was right. Family supports each other. And if one thing he knew for sure, was that not only his family at home was everything he could have hoped for but so was his work family.

He was truly a lucky guy.

~~~~~~~

the End.

[mr-face-both-ways]

Stex Appreciation Month: CB!

Can’t trust anyone these days, remember I can face both ways!

Ah yes, my url’s namesake, i finally had time to finish and post something lol i’ll post the others soon

Questions answered under the cut! This is extra long because he is my Fave and im Biased 

Fave song: There’s Me hands down, the whole scene including That Was Unfair is just so good in establishing CB’s, Greaseball and Dinah’s characters so well, plus the melody is just*chef’s kiss* and the fact that its technically a villain song?? Love that, plus the parallels of him finding Dinah alone and upset and comforting and supporting her and lending her a hand up and sending her on her way after she’s cheered up, with post race 3 where he’s the reason Rusty’s alone and hurt on the floor, kicking him when he tries to get up (looking at you 1991 boot) and mocks and insults him, leaving him alone with his confidence broken as he leaves laughing. What an absolute bastard!! But when There’s Me is taken out, you don’t properly see his two sides, both the bad and good sides are important to his character! He’s a contrary dude but that’s just him! Plus the actual song has one of my fave melodies of the show, I can and do listen to the intro from the ost on repeat, plus that lil bit in the japan vid?? So cute?? And the contrasting styles to that and Wide Smile?? Amazing, love it

Fave actor: Once again my fave actor list is gonna be like 5 people lol, the great thing about C.B’s material is that his attitude and demeanour can change based on his inflection, movement etc so! Michael Staniforth is a given, his Wide Smile really demonstrates his range which imo not many others have been quite as good, plus what extremely little footage and photos there are of him he was extremely expressive and just fun to watch! I’ll also go with Peter Rees, Andrew Prosser, Hans Johansson, Oliver Rhoe Thornton (and what the heck let’s also go for early Kapa Kitchen and Daniel Ellison)

Fave ship: Ohh boy this is super self indulgent but CBGB honestly (has the fandom given it a nickname? Greaseboose?? idk) I love that in the older scripts him and GB high five (that us boot where cb does a lil jump to hit GB’s high five?? Adorable) and actually talk like friends?? Like Greaseball is a jerk to pretty much everyone and for him to be friendly with him is just sweet. Not to mention its Greaseball who tells his gang that CB’s a “mean machine”, is always calling out to CB in the races and a recent thing that clicked in my brain is that when CB says “what a race, what a team!” and GB’s like “shhh! ohhh you mean me and dinah?” like did he just think that CB was about to out that they were working together during the race to crash the other engines in front of Dinah so he shushed him, then realised he was talking about GB and Dinah?? then just the whole exchange after sabotaging Rusty?? Duet One Rock and Roll? That GB just lifts him up like its nothing then they just kinda sit on eachother?? Those two are in cahoots I tell you!! Plus to me i get the vibe that they’ve been working together for years?? I just love their dynamic haha (and CB’s the only one i think who calls him GB that’s so cute) oh and platonic CB/Dinah is top tier, I feel like Dinah’s a very emotionally honest person so CB would feel like he could actually trust her?? And thanks to the new megamix Canoose/Elektra can have one right, as a treat

Fave thing about him: His independence! All the other characters are very much driven by either winning the races or finding love (or both), and C.B. just...doesn’t care. What you “are” is a big deal in Stex, like the engines, coaches and freight all have their identities shaped by their titles, and that can influence how they feel about the above two subjects “nobody can do it like a steam train”, etc and looking at when C.B. does participate in the races him and his partner tend to take the lead so he is good at racing!! But he chooses not to in order to make his own fun (at the expense of pretty much everyone else). He also seems to have a level of self-awareness, take his verse in Freight for example, he knows that as a brakevan he has to essentially serve the freight train, perceptually at the back of the train. But instead he uses his “purpose” aka his brakes to not do what he’s been told and to disrupt the train, and gets away with it by presenting himself as the innocent helpful brakevan! He’s just doing his own thing, (poor Rusty but,,) good for him!! And of course I have to say again, his two sides, and the ambiguity of it?? Like is he good, bad?? He’s both and neither?? An absolute force of chaos, but it only really works when both sides are present. Plus he a cutie tehe

Random headcanon: I think he’s unnervingly observant, even moreso than Pearl, and has amazing peripheral vision. That and taking notice of things like vibrations on the rails he’s very good at telling whose around before they’ve fully come into vision. He’s always watching everything around him, and isn’t necessarily being creepy, he’s just trying to get as much info on the current situation as possible. I think he likes to have some control and be on top of things?? I also really like the ex-boxcar theory (I first saw this theory on the old bellesdomain forums, rip) and I think that maybe when he was converted it was very difficult for him, having to deal with people, and having the CB radio to control what he hears helps ground him and keep his thoughts less cluttered?? He might’ve also forgotten a lot of his boxcar days, so when he says “you know I’m to blame but you don’t know my name” maybe he doesn’t even remember his original name?? And never got a new one as just the Red Caboose, so he clung onto the CB radio to give himself a sense of identity when his previous identity was stripped from him?? IDK

Unpopular opinion: This wagon can hold so many spicy takes he’s not a murderer lol but at the same time i can see where people can think that considering the lyrics reference several real-life train crashes even if they don’t make sense for CB to be there which tbh I put down to Stilgoe going tehe railway incident reference! I think he’s travelled around a lot and done a lot of questionable things, and maybe he was responsible for those crashes in the stex universe?? or maybe he’s just lying?? he’s definitely responsible for some shit, but considering he crashes 5 (!!!) engines during that one race night and being publicly humiliated after race 4 he doesn’t get in trouble and besides, all those engines are back for light at the end of the tunnel, they’re fine lol. Another thing is that I haaaate how CB has like no agency anymore in the current version like everything he does is for money, he’s basically a henchman for the engines (and everyone knows what his deal is and he isn’t in train jail?? what??) and they got rid of the pre-race 4 bit “just for me, I’m in this just for me” (in that slightly twisted there’s me melody) and Electra desperately pleading “help me caboose, help me caboose” to just the generic “I’ll help you win” at the end and not really its own little bit anymore like he barely has his own motivations anymore, it actually makes me really sad :( it really just doesn’t feel like CB anymore, though his character has been really disjointed since like 2007 when they got rid of there’s me. He’s just kinda bland now, like before he instigated a lot of the conflict, now others tell him to do something and he does it. I could like him more if he had an ounce more depth, like why is he so motivated by money? Maybe go into that old vs new tech theme and bring up that now that there’s new tech that can do the job of a brakevan he’s now antiquated and has to go into crime to get by?? Idk just please give me something, I think CB’s always been a bit of a fan favourite because he had multiple layers to his personality but new boose just has a whole lotta nothing :/ 

Anyway let’s end on a positive note at least we got pride lighting and a solo in the megamix so that’s something I guess XD 

[jimimn]

HI ITS ME WHO'S NOT OVER JJK BLONDE SELFIE AND WILL NEVER BE -💫

HELLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO <33333333

HONESTLY ITS THE WAY YOH SAY SUCH NICE THINGS AND I DISAPPEAR FOR DAYS ON END BECAUSE INCONSISTENCY BLEEDS INTO EVERY CORNER OF MY LIFE FNEKALKD BUT I'M GETTING DONE WITH MY FIRST LEG OF EXAMS ON MONDAY SO YAY TO THAT!! OKAY I THINK WE'LL MOVE SLOWLY WITH BABY STEPS JUNGKOOK DROPPED SOME SELCAS JIMIN DROPPED SOME SELCAS IN THE WORDS OF THE LEGENDARY JEON JUNGKOOK ALL WE NEED NOW IS "together..BAM!" (THAT'S LITERALLY ONE OF MY FAVORITE MOMENTS EVER THE WAY HE SAYS IT 🤧)

YES IN THIS HOUSE WE SCREAM OVER JIMIN'S DISRESPECT HE IS THE PARAGON OF A MULTI-FACETED MAN THAT HAS US WRAPPED AROUND HIS FINGER. THE AUDACITY 😤

CHANEL X JIMIN LETS MAKE IT HAPPEN AND OMG THAT SELFIE THAT DROPPED?? SIR???? WHAT THE ACTUAL HELL?? I MEAN YES BH SAID LET'S DROP SELFIES IN BULK BUT THAT ONE PICTURE OF HIM IN BLACK(GREY? I DONT KNOW FHSKKAJF) WITH THE SHIRTS UNBUTTONED!!! THEM COLLARBONES ARE FREE AND THEY'RE THRIVING IN THE OPEN IN THAT ONE. ALSO HIS LIPS ARE SO PRETTY. OH GOD LITERALLY HE HAS THAT COCKY SMIRK ON HIS FACE WHEN HE KNOWS HE DOES HOT BOY SHIT LIKE SHUT UP OK YOU CANT DO THAT JAIL FOR U NDNSLSKAJJW

SUCH A FUCKING TEASE THATS RIGHT!! EVEN STRAIGHT MEN?? BRO LIKE HOW DO YOU HAVE ALL GENDERS JUST TRIPPING OVER THEMSELVES FOR YOU IT'S INSANE AND OMG MISS SHIVI HAVE YOU SEEN THAT ONE CLIP IN WHICH JIMIN HOLDS HIS GAZE WITH THESE MEN WHO LOOK AT HIM (i think it was bon voyage?) and when they cross each other he JUST SMIRKS AND RUNS HIS HAND THROUGH HIS HAIR LIKE YEAH OK ALEXA PLAY I'M SEXY AND I KNOW IT. AND YES I'LL LISTEN TO EVERYTHING YOU HAVE TO SAY ANYTIME 💗💗

12PM KST IS THE HOLY HOUR I TELL YOU ALTHOUGH I REMEMBER WAITING THE NIGHT BEFORE BE CAME OUT WAITING FOR SOMETHING TO COME AND BH WAS JUST LIKE "yea...no" OMG THAT'S AWESOME YOUR COUSIN'S VISITING YOU

HHFJDOSO YEAH IT'S BEEN A WHILE SINCE THEY DID THE JUMP ALTHOUGHHHH I'M POSITIVE THEY'LL DO SMTH COOL LIKE THAT IN THEIR CONCERTS BECAUSE THEIR PERFORMANCE QUALITY IS JUST.. THROUGH THE ROOF IT'S CRAZY!! WHEN THE PERFORM WINGS?? LIKE HOLY SHIT NO CHOREO NO POSITIONS JUST BTS RUNNING AROUND THE STAGE MAKING THE CROWD GO FERAL I LOVE EVERY WINGS PERFORMANCE SO MUCH MY SEROTONIN LEVELS ARE ALWAYS AT A HIGH THEN. OOHH MY GODDD BS&T IS REALLY THAT BITCH!!!! WHO'S DOING IT LIKE HER TODAY NO ONE IS EXACTLY. AND NOOOO I TOTALLY GET IT WE THINK ON THE SAME WAVELENGTH THAT ACCIDENT HAS THE SAME EFFECT ON ME. IF ONLY YOU'D TOLD ME THEN IN 2016 THAT THAT ACCIDENT WAS THE START OF SO MANY I'D BE PREPARED FOR EVERYTHING THAT FOLLOWED (see: him basically stripping himself that one serendipity performance. holy shit.)

FOR REAL THO CHRISTMAS LOVE DROPPED OUT OF NOWHERE AND DO YOU REMEMBER JIMIN SAYINF uUH iM nOt wORkInG oN a SoLo SoNg aT ThE mOmEnT heHe LIKE ALL MEN DO IS LIE OK AT THIS POINT. BYE. YES TAEHYUNG DID WARN US BUT ARMYS (LIKE MYSELF) PUT THEIR CLOWN WIGS ON AND THOUGHT IT WAS KTH1 LMAO. OMG I HOPE YOU DON'T SLEEP THROUGH ANY OF THEIR UPCOMING SONG RELEASES BUT I'M SURE IT'S THE BEST FEELING TO WAKE UP TO CHECK YOUR NOTIFS AND SEE "Big Hit Labels" BECAUSE THAT'S HOW YOU KNOW IT'S GOING TO BE FIREEE. DUDE SERIOUSLY I NEED JIMIN TO GO LIVE AGAIN (although we've been well fed by namjoon for now🤧😌💗) LIKE THAT ONE YT LIVE WHERE HE SAID "O...M...G" SHUT UP STOP BEING SO CUTE I'M DHJSWLIFJWKALS

LMAO OKAY YEAH THAT'S VALID YOUR BLOG THEME IS BASICALLY ✨jimin✨ AND I LOVE THAT IT REALLY GRAVITATED ME AND YOUR URL OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDD YOUR BRAINNN 💆‍♀️💆‍♀️💆‍♀️💆‍♀️💆‍♀️

YES YES YES JIMIN IS SO PERFECT AND THE SOCK DOODLESSS 😭😭😭 oooo so when did you get into giffing? how did you start? BROOOOO YOUR URL'S ORIGIN STORY. I LOVE IT WOW YES IT'S DEFINITELY GOT THE REQUIRED ✨pazzaz✨

NOOO OMG THIS URL IS YOUR BRAND LIKE YOU'RE A LEGEND ON ARMYBLR I LOVE IT SO MUCH. BUT STILL!! IT'S YOUR CHOICE AT THE END 💖

OMG QUARANTINE DID IT'S ONE GOOD JOB AND GOT YOU INTO BANGTAN YAY. OMG YOU AND MISS LIFEGOESMON ARE FRIENDSS??? LEGENDS INTERACTING THIS IS SO COOL. LMAO THE PARADIGM SHIFT YOU MUST'VE FELT FROM LISTENING TO STAY GOLD (WHICH BTW THE MV...THE LITERAL CUTEST OH GOD THE LITTLE DOG AND JIMIN'S LITTLE SMILES DHSJAOWO) TO THEN GOING TO BST IN WHICH JIMIN IS BASICALLY STRIPPING AND JUNGKOOK IS UPSIDE DOWN LMAOOO. YES BS&T HAS EVERYONE HOOKED THE POWERRRR. YOU FALLING DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE WITH YOUR FRIEND'S ASSISTANCE OH GOD THIS IS SO CUTE 💓 EVERYTHING ABOUT THEM 🥺🥺🥺

AAAAH OKAY MY STORY ISN'T AS INTERESTING AS YOURS IS BUT IN 2016 BASICALLY ALL I KNEW OF KPOP WAS GANGNAM STYLE AND WASNT WILLING TO CUANGE THAT PERCEPTION (FOOL BEHAVIOUR I TELL YOU) AND WAS TOO BUSY OBSESSING OVER ONE DIRECTION'S REUNION AND SO ONE NIGHT (THE NIGHT BEFORE JIMIN'S BIRTHDAY 🤧🤧) I JUST STUMBLED UPON THEIR BS&T TEARS MV AND I HEARD IT AND I WAS LIKE OMG!! THIS IS THAT SUPER ADDICTIVE SONG THAT I'D HEARD SOMEWHERE AND IT JUST SPIRALLED FROM THERE I REMEMBER SEEING JIMIN AND BEING LIKE 👀👀👀👀 WHO IS HE I LIKE HIM AND JUST HIS AURA DREW ME IN SOOO MUCH AND WHEN I WAS GETTING INTO THEM I REMEMBER WRITING THEIR NAMES IN MY NOTES TO SEE IF I COULD REMEMBER 🤧 AND I STILL HAVE THAT NOTE FROM 4+ YEARS AGO 💓 AND YEAH BASICALLY SEEING THEM DO ALL THE MUSIC SHOWS AND STUFF AT THE TIME WAS SO COOOL AND MIND YOU BH DIDN'T HAVE SUBS FOR BANGTAN BOMBS THEN SO WENT ON THESE SKETCHY DAILYMOTION TYPE SITES LOOKING FOR ALL THE CONTENT I COULD CHURN OUT LMAO

AND YES!! COURTESY OF YOU I DID WATCH SOME RUN EPS!! I WATCHED THEIR CANADA ONES SPEAKING OF WHICH I LOOOVE THAT PART WHERE THEY'RE DOING THAT SONG GUESSING THING IN THE MORNING AND JIMIN SAYS "are you cold?" 🥺🥺 TO TAE AND HUGS HIM URRHRHEHSJSJSH AND I ALSO SAW THE ONES WITH THE PUPPIES GODDDDD I LOVE THE PUPPIES ONE SO MUCH LITERALLY JUNGKOOK AND HIS DOG (MIRI?) OH MY GOD THAT LIL FLUFFER AND ADAM IS MY ICON WITH HOW HE JUST DID HIS OWN THING LMAO.

BUT ANYWAY!! DO YOU HAVE A FAVE ERA?? LIKE DO YOU EVER LOOK AT THEM AND GO "Damn I wish I was a fan then" BECAUSE HONESTLY I WISH I HAD STANNED THEM IN THEIR DOPE ERA BUT I DON'T THINK I WOULD HAVE SURVIVED JIMIN THEN DHKSOWID-💫

FOR THE UMPTEENTH TIME!!!!!!! ITS OKAY!!!!!!!! I TOTALLY TOTALLY UNDERSTAND!!!!! AND YAYYYYY CONGRATS I HOPE THE FIRST LEG OF EXAMS WENT WELL <333333 AND OH MY GOD you’re gonna make me cry with the together baam goddddddd same one of my fave moments and jimin’s giggles after that 😭😭😭😭 my babies <3 :((((

that..... black suit selca....... that opened button...... like open one more dear sir who’s stopping you... just do it <33333 YEAH he totally needs to shut up with his i know im hot side it just kills me every single time 😭😭😭😭😭

LISTEN THAT BV3 MOMENT  S H O O K  ME OKAY????? THOSE GUYS LOOKED AT HIM AND HE WAS SO FUCKING SMUG ABOUT IT (AND HE SHOULD BE) AND THE WAY HE LICKED HIS LIPS AND RAN HIS HANDS THROUGH HIS HAIR????? LIKE HE KNOWS HE HAS EVERY SINGLE PERSON; NO MATTER WHAT GENDER; WRAPPED AROUND HIS LIL PINKY LIKE THAT???????

OH MY GOD ME TOO I LOVEEEEEEEEEEE THE WINGS STAGE AND WATCHING THEM HAVE SO MUCH FUN IS JUST SO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND I ALSO ABSOLUTELY LOVVVEEE THEIR ENERGY DURING THE SY TOUR MEDLEY WITH IDOL AND BAEPSAE AND FIRE AND DOPE ZSXDFGFCHGVJBHJN THEY JUST LOSE THEMSELVES IN THE CROWD AND THE MUSIC AND ITS JUST SO FUCKING SURREAL TO WATCH HOW MUCH THEY ENJOY DOING WHAT THEY DO!!!!! kinda makes me want to find that happiness and passion in whatever i do in my professional life <3 and LISTEN jimin said the break the soul commentary THAT HE COULD DO SERENDIPITY SHIRTLESS TOO. THE AUDACITY. HE SAID THAT WITH HIS WHOLE CHEST. 

YOU KNWO WHAT I THINK JIMIN WON’T GIVE US A HINT BEFORE DROPPING PJM1. HE’LL JUST DROP IT ONE FINE DAY OUT OF NOWHERE LIKE HE DROPPED PROMISE AND CHRISTMAS LOVE (i wasn’t here when he dropped promise but i read that on twitter sdfghjkl) AND NO PLS NO I DO N O T WANT TO SLEEP THROUGH JJK1 OR KTH1 OR PJM1 OR KSJ1 OR NAMGI MIXTAPE 3 OR HOBI MIXTAPE 2 OR ANYTHING BASICALLY YOU GET IT i had slept through dynamite cb because i had NO CLUE that they were gonna drop it at 1pm kst rather than 12 am kst. i was under the impression that since they dropped all the teaser pictures and the teaser itself as 12 am kst, the mv will drop at 12 am kst too. and I woke up like two hours after the mv dropped (which was almost noon my time) and i felt like A FUCKING FOOL AND I JUST 😭😭😭😭 NEVER WANT TO FEEL LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN 😭😭😭 

AND YES BABIE NEEDS TO COME LIVE SOON PLS I MISS HIM SO FUCKING MUCH :((((( AND HIS O...M.....G HAD MADE ME FUCKING SOBBBBBBBBBBB his yt live god he looked sooooooo fluffy with his hair and his tiny hands and his puppy eyes and soft voice im just so 😭😭😭😭😭😭

NO NONNONONONO PLEASE IM NO LEGEND DON’T SAY THAT IM EMBARRASSED im just a normal fangirl who makes okayish gifs 😭😭 and ok yes so i started giffing LONNNGGGGGG time back on a different public fan forum from my country but i never knew the right process and stuff so obviously the gifs were shitty lmao BUT ANYWAY i got into gifmaking PROPERLY this in july last year and obviously struggled a lot in the beginning because i didn’t know shit about colouring and stuff lmao but i kept practicing and even though im not perfect rn i do think that i got better. i love giffing tho. its such a nice creative outlet and whenever i gif the boys it brings me so much happiness :( <33

AND YES ASDFGHJKL ME AND HER ARE FRIENDS SINCE A VERY LONG TIME SDFGHJK LIKE LONG BEFORE BOTH OF US GOT INTO BTS SDFGHJ and ah yes the whiplash lmaooooooo and you’re right god the stay gold mv is SO FUCKING PRETTY THE COLOURS IN THAT ENTIRE MV HELLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOO AND JIMIN AND TAE AND JOON WITH THE DOGGO JUST EVERYTHING SDFGHJK <3333333 AND BS&T DUDE I GIFFED THE MV YESTERDAY AND IM 💀💀💀💀💀 (like i just giffed jimin from the mv but i did watch the whole thing 5647589 times <333333) AND GUESS WHAT!!!!!! I WAS A LILLY SINGH FAN (IDK IF YOU KNOW HER SHE’S A YOUTUBER) BACK IN 2016 AND PEOPLE BACK THEN HAD REQUESTED HER TO REACT TO BS&T MV AND I HAD WATCHED HER REACTION VIDEO AND (although it didn’t stick with me back then because i was a fucking fool) I DID SOMEHOW REMEMBERED THE JIN AND STATUE KISSING MOMENT AND WHEN IN 2020 I SAW THE MV AND SAW THE KISSING MOMENT MY BRAIN JUST!!!!!!!!!!! I WAS LIKE HOLY SHIT I HAVE SEEN THIS BEFORE SOMEWHERE AND THEN I REMEMBERED I HAD SEEN THIS IN THE REACTION VIDEO LMAOOOOO i wish i hadn’t been a fool and gotten into them back then :((((

AH NO OMG YOUR STORY IS SOOOOOOO CUTEEEEEEEEEE ATLEAST YOU WEREN’T A FOOL LIKE ME TO NOT GET ATTRACTED TO BS&T THE FIRST TIME OF SEEING IT!!!! I WANNA HIT MY 2016 SELF LIKE DAMN YOU YOU FOOLISH ASSHOLE AND yes omg how did y’all do the subs thing damnnnnn i can’t imagine

AND YES THE CANADA RUN EPIS ARE LOOOVVVEEEE and that vmin moment plsssssss i cry everytime 😭😭😭😭😭 it is just so soft and innocent and tae’s little smile after jimin just turns around and hugs him 😔😔😔😔 i love soulmates 😔😔😔😔 AND MIRI YES OMG EVERYONE WAS SO IMPRESSED BY THE LITTLE CUTIE AND THE WAY JUNGKOOK JUST KEPT ADORING HER THROUGHOUT MADE ME SO SO SOFTTTT and bro adam is me. i am like that. lazy and un-motivated AF. although if i were a dog and jin were to be my owner i would listen to him so well and jump on him every chance i’d get 😌😌😌

GOD YES RED HAIR DOPE ERA JIMIN 💀 BABIE BUT MAKE IT SEXY 🥵🥵 AND OMG YESDGFHG MY FAVE ERA IS HYYH. ORANGE HAIRED JIMIN. PLS. HE’S EVERYTHING. I WISH I HAD GOTTEN INTO THEM DURING THAT. LIKE THAT ERA IS ..... SOMEHOW SO FUCKING WILD AND STILL SO ASSURING AND CALMING ????? KEEPS ME ROOTED LIKE IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN DFGHJKL AND WINGS TOO DAMN I WISH I WAS HERE TO LIVE ALL THOSE AMAZING ERAS. but even though i wish i had gotten into them earlier... i think i found them when i needed them the most. I was going through a very difficult time last year and they somehow they made me feel so fucking safe and at home that the connection was instant. honestly i’ve never stanned or felt a connection with any celebrity as strong as the one i feel with bangtan. its like... they don’t know i exist but they still know EXACTLY what im feeling and what to say or do at that time to make me feel comforted. Its weird god but its true :((( SORRY I GOT EMO I JUST LOVE THEM A LOT SDFGHJKL

[thestartline]

NYLON JAPAN February Issue - Stray Kids Eng Trans

NYLON JAPAN February Issue - Stray Kids Eng Trans

The world based Stray Kids has appeared for the first time!

At the start of the year, I read a fortune telling column on some magazine, that I’ll have a new encounter during the latter half of the year. The new counter in the latter half of 2019 was with Stray Kids, and the fortune telling was true. The shock I had when I first saw Stray Kids. Their fluid but powerful dancing, vocals that captured anyone who listened to them, and their rap performance as goo as any hip hop artist. Anyone who sees their stage will for sure be captivated by them. For the first time, Stray Kids have appeared solo on a Japanese magazine, and on the cover of NYLON guys. After their debut in Korea in 2018, they quickly went on a very successful world tour, showcasing their popularity and significance not only within Asia but all over the world. They have finally announced their long awaited Japanese debut in March of 2020. As for a boy group which is world based, this might be something normal. We will introduce Stray Kids who will surely become the icon of all boys group, through their fortune tellings and special photoshoot by NYLON JAPAN.

Lee Know

Known for his powerful and flexible dance. From his beautiful sculpted face, he is named the “Dancing Gem” by the fans. From Korea. 

Fortune SKZ2020 >> Lee Know

The year which will determine which direction to go forward to. Your surroundings might be surprised by your decisions in March. Your childish side will need to be toned down. There may be a possibility that you’ll wish to pursue something on the world level in August. Need to be cautious of your responsible nature and how you may try too hard at times. On your own pace, have fun both personally and officially!

Changbin

A skillful rapper known for his dark voice. Also highly regarded for his lyric writing. Often teased within the group. From Korea. 

Fortune SKZ2020 >> Changbin 

Your heart will be filled with happiness in 2020. During the winter, you will be concerned with your surroundings more than yourself which might be troubling, but by April, you will find a peaceful solution. From May will be a time to learn, and there will be more areas which will need to be understood. By September, you may possibly try something new! If you feel stuck, try relying on I.N.!

Hyunjin

With his sweet face, he is a visual that everyone admits. A dancer that leads Stray Kids. From Korea.

Fortune SKZ2020 >> Hyunjin

Anyone who sees you will understand its a happy year for you. If there is anything you wish to try, try saying it out loud! If it is accepted, April may become a fun month for you to delve into it. June and July may be a little challenging, but from August onwards, you will be once again surrounded by everything you love.

I.N.

The youngest in the member in charge of vocals. A natural airhead that is loved by the members. His dimples when he laughs is his charming point. From Korea.

Fortune SKZ2020 >> I.N.

Your life will become richer, and you will step into something new. Early in the new year, a big offer might come your way, signaling your luck. During the spring, you will be strapped to something with history and order but think of it as a learning period! By September, you will be someone who is highly regarded. Your free spirit will always be by your side. 

Han

In charge of rap but also a skilled vocalist; an all rounder. Part of “3RACHA” along with Bang Chan and Changbin. From Korea.

Fortune SKZ2020 >> Han

A year which you might have a lot of responsible jobs coming your way, but always remember that you will be one smiling at the end. From January, you might be caught up on the past, but your goal is April! You will have new ties in surprising places, and if you want to be acknowledged, set your goal for September and you will succeed.

Bang Chan

The leader of Stray Kids and the brain of the group. In charge of writing lyrics and songs as well as producing. From Australia.

Fortune SKZ2020 >> Bang Chan

2020 is a year that might change things dramatically. From the start of the year to March, you will be able to rest. If you are sensitive to your surroundings, many new supporters will appear and you will have a strong wind to push you through in June. On the other hand, by September, you might possibly change tracks and be greatly successful. Your heart will be delicate so you will need the support of your members. 

Seungmin

Mostly in charge of vocals. His skills earned him second place in his companies audition. Also speaks English well, and is an intelligent character. From Korea.

Fortune SKZ 2020 >> Seungmin

The hobbies and fun things you are absorbed in might become part of work for you, a lucky sign. From January, your luck with personal relations seem great as well. By spring, captivating job offers will come your way. In August, some difficult things might occur, but if you believe it is a chance for you to step up and endure it, you will be able to uncover a new self that you didn’t know about. 

Felix

With his cute visuals, but extreme deep voice, he is well known for his gap. Pay attention to his sexy rap and sharp dance moves! From Australia.

Fortune SKZ2020 >> Felix

Both personally and officially, you will be happy. Be generous to yourself! There will be a lot of changes in January, but March and April will bring new chances and allow you get on board. You might be able to reach for something you have always been dreaming about in August. Be sensible in November to not be scolded at. 

In the cold and brisk breeze, reminding me of winter’s arrival, I met Stray Kids in Seoul, Korea. They entered the set still looking sleepy. During the waiting times, they played with the cats on set, or teased each other, showing the natural sides of the group, the average age of the members being 19 years old. Different to the powerful faces they have on stage, another reason as to why they are popular. A little different to their normal styles, with the colourful outfits and ennui concept. Feel their first story through NYLON JAPAN.

Q. Firstly, please tell us how you feel about today’s shoot.

Bang Chan: As it is our first appearance on NYLON JAPAN, we are very honoured just by that. It has created a new precious memory for me. 

Lee Know: Today’s set is a famous shooting area! I have always wanted to come here, so I am very happy to be here on such wonderful opportunity.

Changbin: It is a derelict amusement park, and it was great to be able to shoot in the unique atmosphere. I was able to have fun by feeling like I was back in my childhood.

Hyunjin: From the styling, it had a different feeling to our other photoshoots. Personally, I had a lot of fun as the costumes were different to usual styles. 

Han: It’s been a while since we had a location shooting! As it is surrounded by mountains and trees, the air was good and I had a great time from the morning. 

Felix: As we began filming from the morning, I felt refreshed and because we were with the members, I had a great time!

Seungmin: I have actually seen a Japanese photo book before, and it was interesting because I was wearing something similar as to what the model was wearing in the photo book. There were many cats in the set, and it was really funny to see Lee Know taking care of the cats because he seemed like a butler.

I.N.: The shoot was fun, but because I heard it was the ruins of an old amusement park, I was a little scared at first. However, the air was nice and I was able to shoot with a good feeling. 

Q. You wore outfits with a lot of colours today, but do you have any styles you are liking recently?

BC: Always black! I think its my colour. All black fashion, I usually like to wear monotone looks. 

LK: I actually am not really interested in fashion... I used to think about it before, but these days I like to wear whatever is most comfortable.

CB: As winter is approaching, I want to wear things that make me seem softer, or things that are large and relaxed styles. 

HJ: I usually wear cute sweats, hoodie t-shirts, and big sweatpants so I think I’ll like to wear warmer things for the winter. 

FX: Its getting quite cold recently, so I like wearing a fur hood outer these days! I like to feel the warmth from my outers. 

HN: I don’t really prefer any fashion styles, but my style is quite showy compared to the others. The costume I wore today was colourful and I liked it, I want to keep trying lots of styles.

SM: I often like to wear long padding downs, long coats, trench coats, and long outers in general. Coats that go to my knees are warm and I like them. I was happy because my costume for today was a long coast as well. Its my style!

IN: I’m interested in street fashion these days, I used to like clothes that fitted my body, these days I like wearing wide pants, kind of like a newtro (new and retro) style.

Q. What is your favourite (pop) culture?

BC: I have always liked games, but recently, I’ve been busy and haven’t been able to do it much. But whenever I have a little time, I always want to do it... its a stress reliever for me!

LK: I watch a lot of films. Recently, I watched a film released in 2003 called “A Tale of Two Sisters” with Han. It was a horror film, but it was really great!

CB: I’m into music and YouTube. I’ve been listening to senior Kpop artists such as TVXQ and Super Junior, groups I was into when I was younger. On YouTube, I watch funny contents with fresh ideas.

HJ: I’m really into an artist called “Leellamarz” these days, I’ve only been listening to them. I have always been the type to only focus on one thing when I’m into it. 

HN: I like band music, so I’ve been listening to “One Ok Rock”, and recently, I’ve been listening to an English band called “Young Blood”. It’s great.

SM: Listening to band music is a hobby of mine. After listening to DAY6 senior’s songs, I listen to a lot of rock bands these days. It’s great fun to listen to the vocals, keyboard, and bass individually. I don’t know many bands so I’m still learning. The band I began to like recently is “Green Day”. I think their music is fun and good. (Bang Chan began to sing Green Day) If I’m ever going to play any instruments, I want to try the melody parts like the guitar, keyboard, or piano!

IN: Rather than watching movies, I like reading reviews other people wrote. I like to compare my own thoughts to how other people found it. I look for many reviews and enjoy reading them.

Q. Then we’ll move onto questions about music. Unlike other groups, Stray Kids can self produce their songs which is a strength, but is there anything you pay attention to or focus on?

BC: We create our own songs and weave it into the concept, making a performance. And, I think it is the most important part about self producing is to definitely put our message into our songs. We believe it is our strength to be able to tell our message from the bottom of our hearts, and Stray Kids cannot exist without that, which is our self producing. 

HN: As Bang Chan said, we like to make songs that our fans can understand, but what we focus on is having others relate to us. We try to incorporate all the feelings, anxiety, and experiences that people our age might feel into our lyrics, and we really try to have other people relate to us. 

Q. What do you think are the problems of the people in their 10′s have?

HN: There are a lot of young people now that don’t know what to do with themselves now, right? They are facing who they are on the insides, but they aren’t sure. So, I focus on putting in the feelings of not knowing what to do, or not knowing which way is the right way in the lyrics.

Q. Next, I’ll ask a question your beauty. Please tell us the secrets on how you stay good looking all the time

HN: Honestly... I was born good looking so... hahaha! There isn’t anything. Next, fashionista Changbin!

CB: I think its better if you don’t stress if you want a nice or gentle look. Its important to think positively all the time!

BC: To take in nutritional food once every day! There’s no point if your body isn’t healthy!

SM: Rather than being good looking, I think it is important to keep in mind the feelings I had towards music when I started as a Stray Kids member. A straightforward heart!

FX: When I’m on stage playing with the members or performing, or when I am communicating with the fans, I think thats when we look the best.

HJ: Isn’t how good we look on stage the true style for us? Even when we make a little mistake during practise, we practise until we go on stage and make sure the outcome is a 100%. We can accomplish that because we try that hard. We heighten ourselves to the best version of ourselves, and as professionals, we showcase the perfect version on stage. I believe that is how Stray Kids maintain our good looks, 

LK: I used to go on diets and care about how I look on the outside, but now I’m focusing on who I am, trying to face my own heart. 

IN: Who I am on camera and off camera, me on stage and off stage, I try to make sure its all the same me. My definition of good looking is whoever that can be truly who they are, wherever they are. I always try to maintain that mindset!

Q. Okay, so how you maintain your good looks differs. How about a easier question now - please tell us anything that you specifically focus on in terms of eating habits

HJ: I always make sure if there are no eggplants in my meals! I really don’t like eggplants. The members always try to make me eat eggplants, so sometimes I eat them without noticing. 

BC: There is something that I specifically focus on. It’s table manners. To not make noise when I’m eating, if I blow my nose I make sure I won’t trouble the people around me. It’s also important to chew a lot during meals, so I try to chew a lot.

SM: I don’t eat dinner the day before a shoot. Instead, I eat everything I want to eat for breakfast and lunch! I’m the type to lose weight if I don’t eat, so I make sure of how much I eat the day before. 

HN: On off days, there are days where I don’t eat properly, but I have decided to eat something I really want to eat deliciously once a day! Within the group, I don’t have a lot of likes and dislikes, and I think I eat a lot. Even if I bloat the next day, there’s no point if I have no strength! Really, its an excuse though haha.

FX: I’m starting to like eating spicy foods! But, when I eat spicy foods, my body doesn’t handle it too well. I get stomach aches. Days before I have schedules, I refrain from eating spicy foods.

IN: I don’t snack at night! I really bloat easily.

Members: Han is a night snacker, so I.N. always says he’s envious of him!

IN: When I began snacking at night, I can’t stop. I eat the next night too... I can’t stop myself. So I made a promise with myself to stop. I allow myself to snack at night about twice a month!

BC: I try not to snack at night, but I usually can’t help myself and end up eating.

LK: To work out, I’ve been taking a lot of protein lately. I eat whatever I want to eat and take in proteins. I heard about green tea diet before and I was drinking Green Tea frappuccino but it was no use... But, salad and hamburger is good for dieting. Because its filled with carbs, proteins and vitamins, right?

Members: That’s Lee Know’s excuse!

CB: I should take care of what I eat, but I don’t. There is one thing I do focus on, though. I don’t eat cold food and cold drinks. Cold food isn’t good for the body... But, if there are only cold food, I warm it up in my mouth before I drink it in. It’s good for digestion too.

Q. The key content for this month is “fortune telling”, but have any of you had your fortune told before?

LK, HN, IN: We have!

Nylon: Did you believe the results from those fortune tellings?

IN: I was told 2015 won’t be a good year, but 2016 will be better...

HN: At that time, I.N. and I were part of a project. We went to a fortune telling together, and we were told “August will not be a great month” and August was really crazy. I was scolded all the time! Even the smallest things I was scolded for... I should only look at the positive things from a fortune telling, haha!

LK: I was told that my luck will go up when I’m around 30... 

Members: Hahaha! How many more years do you have to wait?

IN: I actually don’t believe in fortune tellings. My parents went to a fortune teller before, and the fortune teller told them their son will either become a judge or a prosecutor. Thats why I didn’t believe in it... but, when I went with Han when I was a trainee, I thought fortune tellings are quite nice, so now I believe in half of it? 

Q. A lot of the readers of NYLON JAPAN are people who treasure their individuality. Please give an advice or message to those who have dreams and ambitions. 

IN: Don’t care about what other’s say about your individuality, and work on your own pace!

BC: There probably are people around you that accept your individuality, and people who relates to you and became your friends. I think it is important to be able to push on for what you enjoy. 

HN: I want the people to talk about how happy and blessed they are. Even having a dream is a big part of happiness. I hope your dreams will come true!

Q. The theme for NYLON JAPAN’s 15th anniversary is “NEW POWER NO BORDER”, but is there anything of this that you relate to?

FX: NEW POWER NO BORDER! (in his native accent)

BC: We always say our greeting by saying “STEP OUT!”. This “step out” means “stepping out of the borders”. With our own style, and our own music, we want to step out of the borders! This “Border” means “border” right? That’s something I relate to. 

Q. What do you want to tell the youths?

HN: There are people with dreams and people without dreams. Those who have dreams may stumble at some moments, and hard times may come along. But, if you can get over those hard times, your dreams will definitely be accomplished. For those who do not have dreams, don’t worry and look at who you are carefully. It’s not late when you find interest in something new, and I hope you’d be able to have some space for that in your heart. “Those who are talented cannot surpass those who try, and those who try cannot surpass those who have fun.” Even at the hardest times, trying your best won’t backstab you, and whatever you are doing, having fun is the best. I really want to tell them those words!

BC: It’s a little simple, but “Just enjoy!” Even at difficult situations, I think the winners are those who stay laughing. If you can have fun, good times will come. You’re still young, and life is long so “carpe diem” !

IN: Even if you can’t see the future, don’t worry about not being able to see, and it’ll be good if you focus on where you are now. 

Members: Those are words for us too

Q. Within your busy schedules, what stimulates you?

LK: This is obvious, but STAY’s are a biggest motivation! This is a fact!

BC: We’re really busy and there are so many things to get done, but interestingly, when I’m talking to the members, I think “maybe the future is bright?”. I feel like I don’t have to worry. The members help me. The existence of a group is good for the energy too. We can take care of each other and stimulate each other!

Q. I didn’t think you’d enjoy this as much. Now, the interview has come to an end. Lastly, you announced your Japan debut! Please tell us how you are feeling about your Japan debut

BC: It has been about a year and a half since we debuted as Stray Kids in Korea, but we are “debuting again” in Japan, which is a new feeling. Everything is new and exciting! We really can’t wait for our Japan debut! We’re all very motivated! Fighting!

Japanese to English Translation by @yarn1003 (skz acc on twit)

!! Please give credit when reposting !!

[mymelodyheart]

Starting Over Chapter 32 ~The Surprise~

"Hey, Jamie, look at this! Ye remember this picture?" Rabbie called out from the other side of the attic, waving a piece of yellowed photograph. "I must have been ten here and look at ye ...ye look like Annie from that musical show."

Ian got up from where he was sat sealing boxes and peered over Rabbie's shoulder. "Fuck, Jamie, ye look flaming hot!"

Joe grimaced and gave Jamie a sympathetic look. It was a normal occurrence that Jamie was the butt of the jokes in the family, having inherited the MacKenzie genes. He'd been the easiest target with his unruly coppery curls, but he'd learned from an early age, the best way to deal with it was by not responding.

Jamie gave a long-suffering sigh and looked all around him. There weren't enough hours in the day, and there was still so much to do before he went to see Claire and got on a plane to France. They needed to box all his rugby memorabilia, trophies and professional photos to be brought later to the rugby academy and displayed in the built-in, glass case Willie had recently installed. It had been his ma's idea to exhibit his rugby collections and awards, in the hope of inspiring young athletes who would be attending the academy. The only problem was, he just hadn't realised there would be plenty of it and paired with a lot of mucking about from his younger brother.

"And here's another one ..."

Willie shot Rabbie a look. "We're supposed to be boxing things up, no' spending yer time on the floor looking at pictures."

"Cool yer jets. I'm going through Jamie's rugby photos, but some of them are mixed with the family ones ...oh look! Here's one with Joe ...oh, and Claire's in it. Jamie, I didnae ken ye knew her back then."

They all gathered around behind Rabbie and bent down to take a closer look. On the photo standing next to Jamie was Joe, another medic and then Claire. Her hair was pulled back, and she was wearing a cap with a Scottish flag sewn into it, the visor almost concealing her eyes. Whereas Jamie and the rest in the photo had been smiling for the camera, Claire's face looked inscrutable.

They stared at the photo for a while. It was taken not that too long ago and wondered if Claire was with Frank already. Jamie guessed she was.

Joe broke the silence first. "Claire used to help my medical team during the early days of her internship," he explained, straightening up. "And working during the rugby game could be quite hectic with all of those lads getting all sorts of bumps and bruises. It was hardly a place to mingle."

"Aye, I understand that, but Jamie ye're in the same photo as her. Didn't ye notice her back then?" Rabbie asked, glancing at Jamie.

Jamie cleared his throat as he peered closer. He had a vague memory, but then again, after their meeting in Lallybroch, he'd always thought Claire looked familiar. He must have seen her in passing but with everything that usually happened in the sideline and all of his concentration focused on the game, it would have been easy to overlook a lot of things. "Aye ...weel ...there were a lot of people going in and out of the locker room after the game. As Joe said, it's hardly a place to socialise." He rubbed a hand behind his neck, wondering what it would have been like if he and Claire had been acquainted back then.

"Hang on a minute," Joe interrupted. "Now I remember that photo. Rabbie, flip it to the other side. There's a message on the back." He looked at Jamie. "I gave you that photo to sign it for Claire. I guess I must have forgotten to ask for it back. She'd wanted an autograph from you, but she'd been too shy to approach you and ask. She was worried you'd remember that awesome smackdown she gave you that time when you got too cheeky with her, so she'd asked me to ask you instead."

_ Ah yes! _ He remembered that encounter now. He'd been teasing her while she'd been attending to his injuries. Jamie felt his cheeks flushed. "Here, give me that. Let me take a look." He took the photo from Rabbie's hand and flipped it over. And sure enough, there was a message from Claire with her neat cursive writing.

_ Dear Mr Fraser,_

_Could you sign this photograph for me? I would be forever grateful if you could spare a moment of your time as I am an avid fan of yours. _

_ Many heartfelt thanks, CB x _

_ PS I am the one on the far right on this picture. _

Despite himself, Jamie grinned. _ Mr Fraser indeed! Will have to get her to say that in private, one of these days. Maybe while we're getting busy under the sheets. _ "I'm keeping this," he said suddenly, running a finger over the written words. _ Christ, I miss her already! _Ever since he'd confessed about Forbes, Claire had finally conceded to staying in his apartment every night. These past few days were like as if an invisible dark cloud had lifted from their midst, and there was more openness in their relationship allowing him to see the future more clearly. Already he was itching to see her again, and it was only a few hours ago he'd last seen her. Now he wished he wasn't going to France anymore.

"Uh-oh, look at him! Ye've gone soft, Jamie lad."

Ian's ribbing launched him out of his reverie and snagged the attention of Rabbie, who grinned and sniggered, making Jamie realise he'd been staring at Claire's writing this whole time,

"Aye, definitely, he's gone soft. Just the other day, I saw him buying tampons for Claire in the shop, and he didnae see me. I overheard him asking a girl if there's a size that fits all," Rabbie chuckled.

Joe and Ian burst out laughing.

_ Ah fuck, here we go! _

Rabbie shook his head. "Hey Jamie, how come ye dinnae ken about tampons? Ye've had a few of them stuck up yer nose when ye'd taken a bashing in the field."

"They're nasal packing you dimwit!" Joe snorted, throwing a crumpled paper at Rabbie. "But I guess you can call them that as it does the same job."

"Ach, Claire has been Jamie's Achilles' heel, and Kryptonite rolled into one," Ian grinned. "Jenny says, when ye start buying tampons for yer girlfriend, that means ye're ready to take it to the next level."

"Aye, I think so too," Rabbie agreed, nodding his head. "I wonder when Jamie is going to ..."

"Are ye done with those photos, Rabbie?" Willie cut in, trying hard not to smile at Jamie's expense.

Rabbie scowled at the older Fraser as he gathered the photos and stood up. "It's done, ye grouchy git," he muttered, getting up and placing the photographs in the open box. "Ye're just surly because the only thing ye're laying at the moment are bricks."

Jamie muttered a curse under his breath. He didn't have time for this, and the last thing wanted was to be in the middle of the big brother and wee brother verbal match. He might have been the target of their taunting as a tag team when they were bairns, but he wasn't about to play referee, middle brother or not.

"Right, lads ...ye think ye can sort this all out without me?" Jamie asked rapidly before Willie could come back with a rebounder for Rabbie. "I need to see Claire before I catch the plane. When I come back from France, dinner, drinks and more drinks are on me for sorting my stuff out." He grabbed his jacket from the nearby chair and pulled them on, careful not to crease the photo in his hand.

Willie scanned the room. "Aye, we can handle this. Ye go ahead, and we'll deal it. See ye in a few days?"

"Aye, see ye in a few days. Everything under control, aye?" When Willie nodded, Jamie faced the room once more. "And Joe, check up on Claire once in a while, alright? She's staying in my apartment while I'm away. And ye Rabbie behave. See you soon, Ian."

"Always mate!" Joe replied as the rest of the lads said their byes. "Now go before ye miss yer ladylove's lunch break."

With that, he turned around and left the attic.

..........

Ignoring the gazes that landed on him and the hush that followed, Jamie scanned the hospital cafeteria for Claire. When he found her sitting on her own at the far end of the room eating something, what looked like a sticky bun and reading a book, he quickly made his way to her, unhearing of the gushes and whispers that followed his wake. He caught her unaware when he planted a kiss on the nape of her neck.

"Jamie!" Claire gasped and looked around, her face blooming red as she caught the glances and attention they were gaining by the second. "You should have called. Do you want to go somewhere private?" she asked, putting the book down.

"No, here will do," he said, taking the seat opposite her and taking her hand in his. When she tried to pull it away, he tightened his hold and grinned. She looked so beautiful when she blushed. "What's the matter, Sassenach? Are ye embarrassed to be seen with yer boyfriend?"

"Of course not! How can you ask such a daft question? I'm surprised you haven't been mobbed, walking in like that without even a cap on."

"I was hoping ye'd protect me if that happened." When she didn't laugh and frowned at the people from the nearby table for staring, he kissed her fingers to catch her attention. "See it this way ...if I came in here with a cap on or any sort of disguise and your colleagues saw us holding hands, they would have figured out eventually who I was. Most of them already ken ye're with me, so they're hardly going to think there is some other bloke ye like to hold hands with. Unless of course, there's another bloke." When her frown deepened, he twined his fingers with hers and changed the subject. "Just joking. Don't mind them, Sassenach." He sighed. "I wish you were coming with me. I'm going to miss you and us, like this."

He'd asked her only once to come to France with him, and when she said she couldn't, he didn't push any further, knowing how dedicated she was to her work. He knew she wanted to go but asking her to take two weeks off was too much of an ask.

"Jamie, I wish I could come too ...you know that. But you'll be busy attending interviews, shoots and other stuff. So really there's no point in me coming. I'll just be bored out of my mind waiting for you to finish when I could be here doing something more productive." She sighed and looked down as he stroked the inside of her wrist. "The only thing I'll regret not coming with you is, we won't be together on my birthday." She looked into his eyes. "But don't worry about it. I'm aware you're doing this for the academy. If it's going to take a little separation sometimes to make this right, then that's what we have to live with."

He wished now they were somewhere private so he could take her in his arms. Instead, he kissed her hands again alternately, taking a few precious moments to lock away the irreplaceable sensation of basking in her love and understanding.

"We'll celebrate yer birthday when I come back," he promised. "Once the academy is up and running, I think I'll settle more into a routine. But I still think we should go on a break before the academy starts. The biggest part of the work is done, thanks to Willie and his team. But God knows when we'll get a chance once we get down to the nitty-gritty part, like hiring and administration. I intend to have the academy ready and functioning by next year, and I want to have everything covered before we officially open our doors."

She leaned forward, propping her elbows on the table and smiled at him. "Just do what you need to do and hurry back to me. I'm quite sure we'll manage a little break before the academy opens." She squeezed his hands and gazed longingly like she's trying to keep them at this moment for as long as possible. When she finally pulled back, it's with a resigned expression. "You're going to be late for your flight. Call me or text me when you get there."

"I will do, I promise."

They left the cafeteria and walked together to the main entrance, and when they were stood outside, she turned to him. "It's only for two weeks, Jamie. We can do this. You've been away from me longer much longer."

"But this time, it's different," he said, referring to the time before he confessed about Forbes.

"I know," she whispered. "We'll be both busy, and before you know it, you're back again."

He nodded and smiled. It took an effort to act like saying goodbye wasn't physically painful. "Aye, ye're right. I'm quite sure the days will fly by quickly. See you in two weeks, Sassenach."

He kissed her briefly, knowing she was conscious of people watching and taking photographs.

"I love you, James Fraser," she whispered, before turning around and going back into the hospital.

Before he could say it back, the door already closed behind her.

..........

_ Nine days down and five days to go before Jamie arrives home_. Claire had taken three days off for her birthday to visit her parents' grave and left last night for Oxford after her gruelling shift. Arriving late at her booked Airbnb, she'd immediately gone to sleep so she could wake up early and have the cemetery to herself.

Before she'd left Edinburgh, Geillis had made her promise to be back around late afternoon today for whatever uncle Lamb had in store for her. Initially thinking Jamie had something to do with the surprise birthday celebration uncle Lamb had planned, her excitement had grown exponentially, believing Jamie would be home earlier than expected. But that hope was immediately dashed when she saw an announcement in social media that Jamie would be attending an interview with a sports network in Paris later today.

She walked past the giant redwood tree, clutching her mother's diary in one hand and a tote bag holding a tartan blanket, flask and flowers in the other. The sun was bright and early, and the autumn air crisp. Today she'd worn her mother's knitted red scarf for the occasion to commemorate her parents' death anniversary. Every year, for the past eight years, instead of celebrating her birthday, she came to visit Wolvercote cemetery where her parents had been laid to rest many years ago. She'd looked forward to visiting, welcoming the tranquil and peaceful surroundings and the chance to get things off her chest, but she had to make sure she arrived early to avoid the tourists that came to see the graves of the Tolkiens.

Following the same route of years past, she took her time wandering through the maze of headstones, reading inscriptions, stopping now and again to say a silent prayer for some of the memorials she'd become familiar with. The engravings promised the dearly departed ones they'd never be forgotten but a promise which sadly, sometimes were broken. She left a single flower on some of the old crooked, crumbling monuments which had no visit or care in a long time, greeting them like they were old friends. In a way, it felt like that, for whenever she stopped by to say hello, time seemed to stand still, the wind unmoving and the birds stilling in acknowledgement.

When she finally reached her parents' graves, their plots side by side next to each other, she was surprised to see generous bouquets of forget-me-nots laid on each headstone. She smiled, thinking it must have been from Reverend Wakefield, an old friend of uncle Lamb or perhaps his housekeeper, Mrs Graham. Either way, she was glad to see the graves well taken care of and free of weeds.

After she'd placed her own flowers in the flower holders, she laid out the tartan blanket on the ground between her parents' graves and settled herself comfortably. She poured herself some coffee and drew out a picture from her mother's diary. It was a photograph Jamie had sent her from France. It was a group photo of him, Joe, a colleague and her. At the back was her own writing she'd written a few years back asking him to sign an autograph. To her delight, he'd signed it with a note saying, _ long overdue _and a smiley face and sent it to her via post.

"Hey, mum and dad ... it's me. How is it going up there?" she whispered, leaning forward to touch their engraved names. "Well, whatever you're doing, I hope you're having a blast and a time of your afterlife. Unfortunately, I don't have much time today because uncle Lamb is planning something for my birthday, so I need to be back home tonight. Anyway, there's something I've been dying to show you ever since I got on the plane last night. Here take a look at this." She held up the photograph in the air as if she was showing it to a live person. "See that guy on the far left? That's Jamie. You probably heard all about him up there and how much of a big deal he is in rugby. Yeah, he's the same guy I've been crushing on for years, and you might remember I've mentioned his name a few times before. Well, what do you think? He's handsome right?"

An unusually warm breeze for a cold autumn morning caressed her cheeks as a monarch butterfly settled on the headstone. She stared at it for a while before slipping the photo back into her mother's diary. "I bet both of you have plenty to say after the year I had. Well, this time last year, I was engaged to Frank ...you remember Frank? Of course, you do. Stupid question. How could you not?" She shook her head as memories from her last visit to the cemetery came flooding back. "You might have noticed during my last visit, I was in a place of uncertainty. And I remember taking mum's diary with me for the first time hoping it would be our way of communicating. I have no idea why I thought of that. Maybe because her writing has brought me comfort over the years." She took a deep breath, and a wood pigeon cooed from a high branch. "It sounded a bit daft at the beginning, but when I look back with hindsight, I think it worked. I know ...I know ... a priest would be having a canary right now if they could hear me talk. You see ... last year I asked you what you thought about me marrying Frank, and then I opened mum's diary and read the first passage my eyes landed on. Can you remember that passage? Because I'm not sure anymore if I said it out loud to you. Well, allow me to remind you." She flipped the diary open to the page she was looking for. "It said ... here's a snippet ..._ from an early age, I've learned to trust my gut because I realised it knows what your head hasn't figured out yet _."

Sighing, her finger drifted over the words she just recited, admiring her mother's beautiful penmanship. "So there you go. Looking back now, I think you were indeed trying to tell me something about trusting my guts, even if the words didn't immediately register into my muddled brain. It may sound crazy, but I honestly believe that with my whole heart. And before you remind me of my Catholic upbringing and call this a form of divination, I'm sorry, but I have to disagree. Reading this diary has been my saving grace while growing up, and it always felt mum wrote those words to guide me one day, and it has, in a lot of ways." A lone starling landed on the neighbouring headstone and chirped.

She closed her eyes for a moment breathing the fresh air and soaking in the warmth of the sun. Then she laid down the diary and took a sip of her coffee. "Anyway, I'm not here to talk about Frank. I'm here to talk about Jamie." She fidgetted with the edge of her scarf and smiled. "Mum, dad, I really love him, and what I feel for him, it's something I've never felt before. It's different this time, and I want you to know I'm happy ...happiest I've been for a long time. So that must count for something, right? I know he made a lot of bad choices in the past ...choices you probably would disapprove of. But hey, we all make mistakes at some point in our lives, and I am no different. Yeah, he is a complex man, I must admit, but he has a big heart and an inherently good soul, and he's proven it time and time again. So I'm hoping you will like him and maybe find it in your heart to love him the same way as I do. And perhaps if it's not too much of a big ask, you can relay a message from me to the old man up there to watch out for him."

A wind suddenly picked, sending a folded note she hadn't seen before from one of the bouquets to land on her lap.

Curious, she unfolded it. When she saw the writing, she gasped, and her eyes widened. _ Oh, sweet mother of God, it's from Jamie! _ With trembling hands and blurring eyes, she read the simple yet heartfelt message.

_ You had left this world a long time ago, but your memories are still fresh in your beautiful daughter's heart and mind. May you rest in peace, knowing I will always protect her and love her with all of me until my heart stops beating. JAMMF _

_ ...Until my heart stops beating? _ Her heart swelled. Who needs a birthday present or celebration when Jamie did something like this out of the blue? At almost every turn, he somehow managed to surprise her with his affection and tenderness, something he'd doubted he'd be capable of. But here it was, a perfect example of love from a perfectly flawed man. She didn't know if it's the words, or the flowers, or the fact she missed him so damn much making her feel like she couldn't breathe right. Half sobbing and half laughing, she reread the note over and over again.

"Good God ...mum, dad, did you see that?" She shook her head and swiped her cheek. "Jamie's even trying to make a good impression on you. Who would do that? And what do you have to say about it? He is charming, isn't he but oh sweet Jesus, I have a sneaking suspicion he knows it too. He's cocky like that, you know? If you were alive today, he would have probably given you a lifetime free ticket to watch rugby. Or a free ticket to anywhere. Uncle Lamb only got a season ticket and a signed jersey, but it was uncle's fault pulling that meat cleaver move on him. But honestly ... Jamie's that smooth he makes my eyes roll, and I can almost see you doing the same."

She pulled out a miniature Fraser whiskey from her pocket. "I know it's still early in the morning, but shall we have a toast? It's my birthday, after all." The wind blew, the falling leaves of red and gold drifting all around her and flipping the pages of her mother's diary to a picture of her first birthday. "I get it, mum and dad," she whispered as she worked on opening the bottle. She didn't know if it's her parents' absence from years gone by or Jamie not being there that made the thought of having a celebratory drink seem bittersweet. Still, she smiled. There was so much in the future to look forward to.

"Today," Claire began, saluting the air with the wee bottle of whisky, "I'm going to honour my uncle's wish, and we're going to start our own new tradition. It was far too long ago that I lost you both, and even though I would give anything to have you both here with me, I wouldn't trade the time I spent growing up with uncle Lamb. So, from now on, every year, I'll celebrate your legacy, instead of dwelling on what could have been." She touched their headstones once more. "I wish both of you could be here to meet Jamie and see what a great job uncle has done being a parent. I have no doubt you're always watching over us. But I want you to know you also had a hand in raising me, with mum's little nuggets of wisdom written in her diary. Thank you for that and know you'll always be in my heart."

She raised her whisky. "To you, mum and dad. I love you both."

She sipped her drink, and as she swallowed a mouthful of the peaty alcohol, the wind lifted the pages of diary once more. She read the first passage her eyes landed on.

_ When the stormy clouds follow us with the turbulent concert of thunder, know that the liberating rain will finally wipe away the tears from our eyes. _

Suddenly out of nowhere a fat blob of water droplet fell onto the page, and when she looked up, she realised for the first time the clouds had drifted to cover the sun. Grabbing her phone from her pocket, she sent a quick text to Geillis, letting her know she would be heading home soon. With a smile, she said goodbye to her parents and gathered her things before she could get caught in the rain.

..........

Claire fished around in her oversized handbag to find her purse as the taxi slowly came to a standstill. She was just pulling a few pound notes when her phone rang.

She groaned when she saw Geillis' name flashing on the screen. "Ah, blooming heck."

When she paid the driver, she answered the call as she struggled to climb out of the vehicle.

"Geillis, hey. Did you get my voice message? I'm sorry I missed my flight in Oxford, so I'm catching the next flight from London. Sorry I'll be late."

She stepped out onto the kerb and gasped. It started to rain hard. Again. Squealing, she ran for the nearest cover, glad she only had a duffle bag to haul.

"Yes, I got yer message but are ye fucking kidding me? How could ye have missed yer flight?"

She paused, took huge deep breaths before making a mad dash to terminal five. "Well, it started to rain unusually hard," she explained huffing. "The Airbnb owner offered to drive me to the airport, but his car broke down on the way, so I missed my flight in Oxford. The best next flight I could get was here in London."

"Yer uncle was very anxious and fidgety when I told him about yer voice message."

"Oh, well, that's to be expected. Uncle Lamb has never planned a birthday surprise before."

"Please make sure you get in the next plane."

"Wow, you're really into this surprise party for me. Who's anxious now?"

"Weel, I put in a lot of effort, so I don't want ye to muck it up."

"I'm so sorry if I sound like I'm taking this lightly, but I'm in a bit of rush here too. Thank God I've printed my boarding pass. I think I'm running a bit late."

"Claire! Don't ye bloody dare miss this flight too or I swear to God ..."

She was trying to walk past a big group when she slipped on the wet tiles. As she let out a scream, her phone and bag went flying in all directions, and she fell heavily on her bottom. When she tried to get up, she slipped again and this time landing on her knees. She grunted when she tried to get up.

"Oh, bugger, bugger!" she muttered, wincing as the pain shot up her leg.

People crowded around her, asking if she was alright as two men helped her up. Mumbling she was fine, she quickly grabbed her handbag, but when she picked up her phone, the screen was cracked. _ Bloody hell! Whatever next! _

"Claire? Hello? Are ye still there?"

"I can hear ye Geillis," she replied, straightening her coat and scarf.

"Hello? Hello? Claire? Ah fuck, she's gone. Probably ran out of battery again. I swear I'm going to kill her."

Realising Geillis couldn't hear a word she was saying, she stuffed her phone back into the pocket of her coat with a sigh of resignation. As the crowd dispersed to catch their own flights, she scanned the area once more in case she'd dropped something else. Satisfied she got everything, she limp-ran to the boarding gate and realised she was the last passenger to board that flight.

..........

By the time Claire made it out of the terminal in Edinburgh, it was already eight in the evening, and she was hungry, bruised, cold, and missing Jamie terribly. To make her discomfort worse, her clothes, still slightly damp from the rain earlier, hadn't dried properly during the flight. She'd tried to change them in the cramp plane's toilet, but too bruised and sore from her fall, she couldn't even manage to lift her leg into a pair of jeans. She still couldn't believe the string of bad luck she'd endured after visiting her parents' grave. Maybe that's what happened when you decide to celebrate your birthday on their death anniversary.

Claire had taken another sneak peek on the last passage she read from her mother's diary. As she reread them again and again, she took the meaning literally and surmised it was probably a warning of the impending rain. Shaking her head, she tamped down the absurd thoughts, scanned the arrivals and was relieved to see Geillis walking towards her.

"Oh my God, what happened to ye? Ye look like a drowned rat!"

Claire wanted to cry and collapsed into Geillis' arms but refrained herself from doing so, afraid of causing a scene. She'd had enough of that in London earlier, so instead, she quickly filled her friend in with the incidents that took place as they made their way to the bathroom so she could change into some fresh clothes. It took them half an hour to make her look decent, and by the time they were in Geillis car, she was ready for bed.

"Christ Geillis is there any chance we can do this birthday party tomorrow? I'm really bone-tired, and all I need right now is a bath and a warm bed."

"Oh no, you don't! A lot of thought has gone to preparing your birthday, so suck it up, princess." When Claire didn't reply, Geillis rummaged through her bag and got some paracetamol. "Here take this, this should take the pain from yer bumps and bruises," she said, handing her the painkillers and a bottle of water.

Grateful, Claire took the medicines and popped two tablets into her mouth. "Sorry for sounding selfish and ungrateful, but it's just that I'm a bit emotional after visiting my parents' grave and missing Jamie so much. I haven't even spoken to Jamie all day."

"Not Jamie's fault, hen. Even if he had a chance to call now, your phone is damaged anyway. Besides, he's busy rearranging the stars in heaven for ye." Geillis handed her a bandana. "Here put this over yer eyes. And make sure ye cannae see a thing."

Claire glared at her. When she saw Geillis was serious, she groaned. "Oh no, Geillis, please no! Do I have to? I promise I will look surprised when we get to wherever we're going. Besides, is this really necessary if there's only me, you, Joe and uncle Lamb?"

Geillis gave her a sympathetic look. "Look, just humour me, alright? I ken it's been a rough day, but I need ye to trust me on this one. Just remember, Lamby had his heart set on this."

It was no use arguing with Geillis when she had no fight in her left. Grumbling under her breath, Claire gave in and tied the bandana over her eyes. When she was done, Geillis checked if she'd done it right.

"Good lass," Geillis said, starting the car and guiding it out from the parking lot.

They rode in silence for the next few minutes, and with all the turns and roundabouts Geillis took, Claire gave up guessing where they were heading to. She was relieved when they finally stopped as she was beginning to feel nauseous. With Geillis' erratic driving and impatience with slow-moving vehicles, Claire's stress level had reached an all-time high by the time her friend turned off the ignition.

Geillis hurriedly got out of her side of the car and helped Claire. "Right, here we are! Mind yer steps, we dinnae want a repeat from the London incident."

"That wasn't funny," Claire scolded, grabbing Geillis' hand. She sniffed the air for some clues to their location, but the one thing that stood out most was the eery stillness of their surrounding. The only sound she could hear was the traffic from a distance. "Jesus, where are we?"

"Patience, lass," Geillis replied, tugging her hand and guiding her forward. "We'll get there soon enough."

They walked for several metres, and when they finally stopped, Claire heard keys jiggling, some electronic beeping sound followed by a heavy door opening. She knew they weren't anywhere near the city and certainly not in a residential building. As they shuffled in, the loud echo of their movements made her think of empty open spaces. "I hope this is not a slaughterhouse you're leading me to. You're mentally unstable enough to come up with something like that."

"Ach, ye're sense of drama never ceases to amaze me."

"And your sense of humour is sometimes sick."

Geillis laughed as she gently pushed Claire into the lift. "Not far to go! Take huge big deep breaths and just remember, no one is making any sick jokes on ye. This is yer day, and it's high time we do a bit of celebration ...Lamby style."

"I don't even have a clue what his style is, so whatever he's got in store for me, it'll definitely be a surprise, and I don't think I would need to pretend anything."

"No, I don't think so either." The lift pinged, and the door slid open with a whoosh. "Alright, this way, we're almost there."

"Oh dear, here we go," she mumbled.

They stepped out, walked some more and then stopped again. Claire heard another door opened and Geillis gently pushed her inside. She held her breath, her heart already near her throat, unsure what to expect next. She just hoped no one was going to jump on her and shout "surprise!" as she had a strong feeling her nerves wouldn't be able to take it after the day she'd already had. Before Claire knew what was happening, Geillis gave her a bear hug. "Happy Birthday, hen," she whispered, her voice suddenly laced with choked emotions. "Just enjoy this, okay? Soak it all in. Promise me."

Surprised at her friend's sudden change in demeanour, Claire could only embrace Geillis back, thinking uncle Lamb must have done something extraordinary to get her all worked up.

"Ye can take off the bandana now and open yer eyes," Geillis whispered.

Before Claire could respond, Geillis stepped back, and the door suddenly shut. _ Ah, hell! _ She whipped off the covering from her eyes and blinked. She was engulfed in darkness. But there was the distant soft glow of city lights coming from outside the window and other than that, she couldn't see a thing. "Hello? Anyone in here? Please don't shout and jump and scare the bejesus out of me, because if you do, I'm out of here."

Nothing. No response.

She carefully moved forward until her hands grasped the ledge of the window and squinted. It was too dark to see and decipher the place she was in. But one thing she was sure of, she was outside of Edinburgh as its silhouette and lights were visible from where she stood.

She heard a whirring sound, and then all of a sudden, brightness replaced the darkness outside, as floodlights illuminated a wide-open space of green. She gasped when she realised she was looking down at a rugby field. It was complete with covered stands, benches and team shelters and even the lines on the mowed field were freshly marked with white. On the far end was a gigantic white screen and surrounding the area were netting erected in place. Everything looked brand spanking new and fresh. It could only mean she was in Jamie's academy. Shaking her head, she laughed out loud. _ He's done it, my bloody Scot has gone and done it! _

Tears started to fall as pride for Jamie overflowed in bucket loads. She was about to grab her phone from the pocket of her coat, but she remembered it wasn't working. So instead she allowed herself to cry like a child, knowing how far Jamie had come and at what cost. This was what he'd always wanted and worked so hard for, and she couldn't be happier for him and what he'd accomplished.

"Why the tears, Sassenach? Don't ye like it?"

Her heart jumped out of her chest, and the moment she spun around, she heard something clicked, and the light in the room went on. Jamie was sat on an office desk, looking ruggedly handsome in his black shirt, faded jeans and a leather jacket, and sporting a week-old scruff.

"Jamie!" she breathed.

He beamed, and it's the most beautiful sight she'd ever seen. With her heart pumping madly, she took quick steps towards him and launched herself into his arms.

He laughed out loud as he caught her, lifting her against him and burying his face into the crook of her neck. "Mo chridhe," he murmured. "Christ, I've missed ye." He inhaled deeply, his lips warm and tantalising against her skin.

"Not as much as I've missed you," she whispered, raining kisses on his jawline. When they drew away, she looked into his eyes, all the restlessness from the past few days dissolving in the warmth of his body heat. "What are you doing here? I thought you were going to do a live interview."

His hands gripped her waist and leaned his forehead against hers. "I did have an interview, but it was done early this morning. The show featured it tonight as live even if it wasnae. I didnae want to miss yer birthday for anything, so we did a pre-recording."

"But when are you going back?" she asked, pulling back. "I love the fact you came here for my birthday, but does that mean you will be away longer because you came here today?"

He stroked her hair and kissed her forehead. "I've finished everything I needed to do." He gave her a lopsided grin, unable to hide his joy. "I did a lot of rescheduling as I didn't want to hang around and wait in between interviews and photocalls. I told them I have a lot of business obligations, so I managed to convince them to scramble their timetable for me."

Her eyes widened in surprise. "Really? So, that's it?" She smiled at him, happier than she could fully express. "No more public appearances?"

"Aye, that's it. The only interview I will entertain in the future will be for the academy." He brushed his lips against hers. "Oh, by the way, happy birthday, Sassenach!"

She linked her hands behind his neck. "Thank you. You being here is the best birthday gift ever and by the way too, congratulations on the completion of your academy. But how on earth did you do all of this so fast?"

"Weel, when I bought this sports complex, all the infrastructure were already here in place, and that helped a lot financially. It needed a lot of work done, and an additional extension to the building, but that wasnae much of a problem as Willie has a great construction team. The extension isnae quite finish yet though, but as ye saw, the field is complete. We are still waiting for some of the equipment for training and gym to arrive. But they're on their way. And this here ..." he waved a hand in the air. "...will be my office."

Claire looked around the spacious room, taking it all in for the first time since she came in. It was beautiful, masculine and fit for a rugby academy director. The whole space had been fitted out with rich dark wood, high-quality furnishings and the latest electronic gadget, including a massive TV on one wall. The exposed brick wall and the wide window overlooking the rugby field lent the room a more modern, twenty-first-century edge, without compromising practicality. It was simply too stunning for words.

Claire untangled herself from Jamie and walked over to the window. "This office reminds me of a private box in Murrayfield stadium. You have a bird's eye view of the whole field. As well as an uninterrupted panorama of Edinburgh."

"That's why I chose this space for my office." He stood behind her and pointed to the roof of the stand's cover. "And over there, Sassenach, is one of the spots where the sign and logo of the academy are going."

"Yes, I can see it already, Jamie," she whispered. "In big, bold, beautiful letters ...James Fraser Academy."

Jamie cleared his throat. "About that, Sassenach, I have something to show ye."

She turned around to face him and watched as he took out a bundle of folded papers from the inside of his jacket and placed it in her hand.

"What's this?"

He smiled nervously and nodded. "Take a look."

It was some sort of official document. Claire flicked through all the pages, skimming paragraphs as she went, but it was all legal jargon to her. "I don't understand, Jamie."

"Oh, sorry," he mumbled, his face turning red. "It's on the last page. Tell me what ye think."

There were only three sections on the page, and right at the bottom where Jamie's signature was supposed to be on the dotted line, was blank. Claire carefully read the words, and as the meaning behind them began to sink in, her heart started to race. Jamie had named his academy FRASER-BEAUCHAMP RUGBY ACADEMY.

She licked her lips and reread the page again, just to make sure she didn't misunderstand anything. "Jamie, but why ..." When she tore her gaze away from the paper, her heart stopped. Jamie was down on one knee in front of her, holding out her mother's engagement ring.

"Sassenach," he said gruffly. "I ken I do a lot of things poorly and a few things well. And when I'm with ye, I feel I can achieve anything and everything. Ye make me a better person, and I want to keep getting better with ye by my side. What I'm trying to say is, I want to spend the rest of my life with ye. I want to have babies with ye and grow old with ye. And if you agree to be my wife, what's mine will be yers, that's why I havenae signed that paper yer holding yet. And I swear as God is my witness, I will cherish ye with every fragment of my being each and every day until I draw my final breath." He swallowed audibly and whispered, "Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp, will ye marry me?"

She gasped. Every ounce of oxygen and emotion she felt for Jamie poured out of her with such incredible force, she couldn't stop the tears from streaming down her face. "Oh, Jamie ..." Her hand clapped over her mouth, stifling her cry.

"Sassenach?"

"Oh, this all too much."

He stood up and pulled her into his arms. "Sassenach, are ye upset because I asked ye to marry me?"

She shook her head and pressed her face against his chest, inhaling his clean, masculine smell. She was crying because they were two broken people when they first met, and despite all odds and their past, their pain had brought them together. It was the messiness of their histories that drove them, and the damage that came with it connected them at a soul level. The scars they carried were so deeply embedded they couldn't see them anymore but recognised them in each other. It would have been easy to wallow in bitterness and succumb to all the negative emotions, but somehow in understanding each other's hurt, they were able to heal and forgive their own shortcomings and give them the strength to have faith in love.

Jamie's hold tightened. "Please tell me those tears mean ye're saying yes. Because if it isnae, this would go down in history as the worse birthday present ever."

Taking a deep breath, she looked up at him and laughed through her tears. "Oh God, Jamie, yes, I want to marry you."

A single tear slid down Jamie's eye as he slid her mother's ring into her finger with trembling hands. And when he kissed her with so much reverence, it felt like they were kissing for the first time. As they gradually pulled away, he wiped the tears from her face. "Uncle Lamb gave me this ring to give to ye. He said this ring has been missing for a while and he found it a few weeks ago. Maybe it's a sign yer ma approves of me."

Claire laughed. "Oh, my mum and dad definitely approve. You don't need to worry about that."

"If ye dinnae approve of the ring, I can buy a new one. I cannae give ye my mother's because she's given it to Willie already."

"Oh, Jamie, this is perfect," she said, splaying her fingers out to admire the jewellery. It was a simple platinum Art Deco ring with two matching cut diamonds in a square frame. It had belonged to her father's mother.

"That's good then if ye think so," he grinned, putting on a pair of AirPods into his ears. "Now are ye ready for this?"

"What are you doing?"

Jamie didn't reply as he swiped a few times on his phone. When he shoved it back into his pocket, he smiled at her and pulled her into his arms. "I want everyone that matters to know that ye said yes. So, Sassenach, ye really do want to marry me?"

"Yes, Jamie, I want to marry you. I have the ring on now, don't I?"

A sudden loud roar of cheers came from the TV, and when she turned around, she was stunned to see Jamie's family, uncle Lamb, Joe and Geillis applauding and cheering on the screen.

"Oh, my God, so this is the surprise," she whispered, more to her herself than to Jamie.

While more shouts of congratulations and good wishes followed, Uncle Lamb's face filled up the TV screen. "Well, what are you both waiting for?" he grumbled into the camera, his face comically up too close. "Everyone is starving. Show us a kiss and come down here and let's celebrate."

Jamie and Claire both laughed and obliged their family and friends. When they got carried away kissing, another uproar ensued reminding them of where they were. With hesitation but with laughter, they untangled themselves from each other's embrace and left Jamie's office, heading down to what would one day be the cafeteria.

But before they entered, Jamie stopped her and pulled her into his arms once again. "Thank ye for choosing me, Sassenach. I still cannae believe I get to call ye my fiancee. But please, let's not make this a long engagement because I cannae wait to start our life together and start calling ye my wife."

She smiled up at him. "I don't want a long engagement neither nor do I want it all over the papers, nor do I wish for a fancy wedding. If ye want we can get married tomorrow."

Jamie shook his head. "Now, Sassenach, dinnae be silly. I want a proper wedding, and I want to see ye walking the aisle in yer dress. I'm gonnae get married only once, and I want to do this right."

"Fine, now kiss me before everyone starts looking for us."

"I love ye," he whispered before he lowered his head to kiss her.

"And I love you too," she murmured against his lips.

When Jamie's phone started to beep, they both groaned in despair.

"Come, Sassenach, we have a double celebration coming up, and everyone has been waiting for hours.."

With smiles in their faces and hearts, they entered the room to the cheers of their love ones.

As they walked hand in hand, Claire realised that loving Jamie will never cease to amaze her. He was like thunder and the gentle rain that follows. He was both fire and balm to her soul. There was no doubt there will be heartaches and pain along the way, but they've seen each other's mess and brokenness, and they still loved each other and came out stronger. She used to think it was fate when he caught her fall from the church window. But now, after all the twist and turns they'd been through, she believed fate is what one makes out of it - you get the love you fight for and the one you think you deserve. Their destiny was to nurture that love and keep reminding themselves, that whatever life throws at them, they will always find their way to each other.

[brokenbuttonsmusic]

Eleni Mandell: L.A. Singer-Songwriter with Smoky Chrissie Hynde Vocals and a flair for Tom Waits’ Influenced Experimentation

This post is a near- transcript of the Broken Buttons: Buried Treasure Music podcast (episode 5, side A). Here you’ll find the narration from the segment featuring the L.A. singer-songwriter, Eleni Mandell, along with links, videos, photos and references for the episode.

Listen to the full episode on Spotify, Apple, Anchor or Mixcloud.

Have you ever bought the wrong record? Like, you intended to buy something that sounded like one thing and you accidentally grab something that sounds very different. 

I don’t know if this happens anymore, but I believe it was quite common years ago. Imagine hearing an artist on the radio and being blown away. You go to the record store, find the plastic divider with the name of whom you’re looking for, but you can’t remember the name of the album, or even the song. Remember, you don’t have a tiny computer in your pocket. You’re too nervous to ask the store clerk for fear of looking stupid. So you roll the dice. 

“I know it was someone called Neil Young, but there are a thousand Neil Young records here.”

“Hey, this pink one looks cool.”

That exact scenario didn’t happen to me, but that album, Neil Young’s Everybody’s Rockin’, happened to be the most played Neil Young album in my house growing up, so for years I thought Neil Young was a rockabilly revival act. In reality, that was one of several oddball records Young released during a tumultuous period with his record label to fulfill his contract demands. I still love that record. 

Eleni Mandell did live out the scenario of buying the wrong record though. She shared the story during a segment of the show Bullseye with Jessie Thorn, where she describes seeing Tom Waits on MTV late at night—back when MTV still cared about music. It was either 120 minutes or IRS’ The Cutting Edge. This would have been around 1984 or 1985, so right around the time of Wait’s masterpiece Rain Dogs. When she went to the record store though, she picked up the 1976 Tom Waits’ Asylum release, Small Change instead. Now Small Change is still a great Tom Waits album, but it sounds nothing like the drastically reimagined sound and musical approach he had begun to employ starting with 1983’s Swordfishtrombones. Something Tom Waits called his “junkyard orchestral deviation.” The spare, off-kilter percussion. Moaning trombones and muted trumpets. Marimba. Plenty of marimba. Experimental instruments mixed in everywhere. Megaphones and CB radios. Trash can lids. 

This is the sound Eleni was looking for. 

Instead she got lush strings. Delicate piano. Cinematic swells and a melancholy wail. 

She got this.

Still awesome, but not the same. She credits the experience with changing her life. She grew to love both sides of the Tom Waits coin. The jazzy piano man in the smoky, whiskey-drenched nightclub and the eclectic, experimental carnival barker that she had her first encounter with on late night MTV. 

You can hear that deep appreciation and influence for the full Tom Waits spectrum injected and swirling through Eleni Mandell’s own spectacular catalog that spans more than 20 years now. 

She’s got plenty of experimental Waits, especially in her early catalog. 

And quite a bit of the jazzy nightclub vibe.

There’s also plenty of folk-y Eleni mixed in, and even some country.

You’ll notice that Eleni’s voice doesn’t sound like Tom Waits though. Did you notice that? It’s less of a deep, gravelly howl and more of rich Chrissie Hynde croon. Spin compared her to Chrissie Hynde and PJ Harvey. Rolling Stone compared her captivating melodies and witty lyricism to early Elvis Costello. 

While she doesn’t have the Tom Waits’ wail, she does specialize in his particular brand of character song-study. Like this first song we’re going to hear. The first track off of Eleni Mandell’s second album Thrill. Released in the year 2000. This is Pauline. 

Pauline, from Eleni Mandell’s second record, Thrill. So how did this remarkably unique singer-songwriter get her start and pull together so many interesting influences to create the sound we just heard.

Eleni grew up in the Sherman Oaks region of the San Fernando Valley, Los Angeles. She started playing music when she was just 5, beginning with the violin and then piano. Eleni didn’t love playing either, but continued to take lessons until she was thirteen. She remembers wanting to learn to write songs early on, but didn’t have the first idea of how to approach it, especially on violin. She jumped from violin and piano to guitar as a teenager. Her parents exposed her to a variety of musical styles. Her mom would take her to musicals and her dad, a serious record collector, played her Hoagy Carmichael and plenty of jazz standards. She loved the Beatles and remembers Diana Ross making an early impression. 

Another early life changing moment came when she discovered the Los Angeles punk band X.

X were huge in LA, and their first album (called Los Angeles) was the first record Eleni ever owned. Or maybe the first she asked to own. The first record she was ever given was Shaun Cassidy’s greatest hits for her 4th birthday. The first she ever purchased with her own money was X’s third release, Under the Big Black Sun. She tells a story of when she was out record shopping at a place called Aron’s Records, located on Melrose, and to her utter befuddlement came face to face with John Doe, lead singer of X. He was shopping for records too. She quickly snapped up a copy of the band’s third album and asked John to sign it. He did. She still has the signed album, which reads “Yours” complete with a big X “-John Doe.” That was the last autograph she ever asked for. It was not, however, the last time her path would cross with that of the band X. 

When she was a little bit older, she met Chuck E. Weiss, songwriter, rock n’ roller, beat poet and peculiar Tom Waits associate. Also the subject of the song, Chuck E.’s in Love.

Yes, that Chuck E. Weiss. Waits was in a relationship with Rickie Lee Jones. Waits, Jones and Weiss all lived at the seedy Tropicana Motel in Los Angeles. One day Weiss up and left out of nowhere. Some time later Chuck E. called the apartment where Jones and Waits were living. He explained to Waits that he had moved to Denver because he had fallen in love with a cousin there. Waits hung up the phone and announced to Jones, “Check E.’s in love. Rickie Lee Jones liked that so much that she it turned it into the song we just heard. 

Who is this episode about again? Oh, right. Eleni Mandell. Anyway, Eleni Mandell met THAT Chuck E. Weiss when she was not yet 21. Still, she had a friend who was able to get her into The Central, a Sunset Strip club that would later become The Viper Room. This would’ve been around 1990. Weiss was playing there every Monday. 

Here’s how the write up on Eleni’s original website describes her first encounter with Weiss.

“The first time she ever saw Chuck E. Weiss perform, he walked right up to her and smiled like a cross between The Cheshire Cat and an escaped mental patient. She met him a month later at Musso and Frank’s.”

Eleni says she was at the famous Hollywood restaurant and recognized Weiss. She worked up the courage to approach him and told him how much she loved his show. He asked if she wanted to accompany him to meet up with a friend at Canter’s Deli. She agreed. When they settled into one of the landmark eaterys iconic red, vinyl booths in walked her hero. Tom Waits. What a night. Tom asked Chuck how he and Eleni had met. 

“Hebrew school,” he declared. 

Here’s a tune from Eleni’s debut album, Wishbone, released in 1999. This is Sylvia. 

From Eleni Mandell’s first album, Wishbone, that was Sylvia. 

Under Chuck E. Weiss’ mentorship, produced by Jon Brion and self-financed by Mandell, Wishbone, as well as her next several records, received strong reviews and drew comparisons to Waits and PJ Harvey in style. 

Before Weiss mentored Mandell, he hired her as a door person at his club. She said he would test her to see how tough a door person she was by trying to grab money out of her hand. Weiss would continue to mentor Eleni over the years and they’re still friends to this day. 

For her fourth album, Mandell shook things up by diving into traditional country. A mix of covers and originals, 2003’s Country For True Lovers is an exciting update to her sound. And one of her life changing moments came full circle. Weiss introduced her to former X guitarist Tony Gilkyson, who produced the project. She also stacked the sessions with all star players, including Nels Cline from Wilco, and another X hero, drummer D.J. Bonebreak. 

Eleni continued to mix and mesh genres on her next release, 2004’s Afternoon. 

From the No Depression review of that album:

“Last years Country For True Lovers found Los Angeles chanteuse Eleni Mandell turning her sights on twang rather than her previous more PJ Harvey-oriented material, and she received plenty of critical acclaim in the process, sharing the LA Weekly 2003 songwriter of the year award with the late Elliot Smith.”

“On Afternoon, her fifth album, Mandell combines her love of various genres, including country, pop, jazz and rock, to stunning effect. Produced by Joshua Grange, who also lends his considerable talents on guitar, pedal steel, Hammond organ and piano, Afternoon mostly takes the slow and sexy approach. I’ve Been Fooled and Can’t You See Im Soulful give Mandell the chance to show off her breathy but passionate alto, which can devastate in a heartbeat.”

“Mandell does rock out from time to time, as on Easy On Your Way Out, which has a grungy Elvis Costello-gets-on-with-Liz Phair feel to it. I wanna be your afternoon/I want you coming back for more, Mandell sings on the sorta fun/sorta sad title song.”

She can also write catchy singles. Like this song from Afternoon, “Let’s Drive Away.”

That was Let’s Drive Away from Eleni Mandell’s fifth album, Afternoon, released in 2004. That song was also featured on the TV show, Weeds.

And here comes the challenging part of covering an artist like Eleni Mandell, who’s put out consistently solid albums for over two decades. There’s not enough time to feature all the good stuff she’s produced, but trust me, over her eleven albums, she always delivers. From the diverse shifting sounds of Artificial Fire [play clip] to the smooth and breezy Dark Lights Up [play clip], Eleni whirls a magical combination of jazz, folk, pop, country and rock, with just enough experimental twists to keep everything fresh. 

She’s also branched out from her solo artist gig to release two albums with her band The Grabs. The Grabs allows her to exercise more of her pop side and features Eleni on vocals, Blondie bassist Nigel Harrison, and Silversun Pickups’ drummer Elvira Gonzalez. 

And, she’s also released records with the Andrews Sisters inspired supergroup, The Living Sisters, with Inara George, Alex Lilly and Becky Stark.

I’d recommend checking out all of this. 

So now that we’ve established that the Eleni Mandell road is paved with the goods, let’s skip ahead to focus on her most recent album: 2019’s Wake Up Again.

Here’s what Eleni and her website have to say about the latest release: 

“For two years or thereabouts,” Mandell says, “I taught songwriting at two colleges and a women’s prison.”

The prison gig came about via Jail Guitar Doors, the organization founded by Wayne Kramer, guitarist of the vaunted Detroit band MC5, in partnership with English musician Billy Bragg. “I don’t know why exactly I was drawn to that work,” Mandell says. “But I had a family member who had been in prison in the 1940s. He wasn’t around when I was growing up, but that sort of fascinated me and I was always curious about what kind of person disappears and what kind of person commits crimes — what are they thinking?”

Working with the inmates also provided many epiphanies for her as a person, and proved fertile for her as an artist, as captured in the 11 songs on this album, her 11th studio release. In many ways it’s the culmination and fulfillment of all the strengths as a writer and performer going back to her start under the tutelage of Chuck E. Weiss, Tom Waits and other top chroniclers of people in the shadows.

“I really enjoyed it,” she says. “I was inspired by the stories, and surprised by the laughter I heard there. And I shouldn’t have been surprised, but I was, by how many different kinds of people were there: teachers, lawyers, nurses, and also people who grew up in poverty.”

Here’s a song about one of the woman she met during those songwriting classes she taught. This is Evelyn.

Evelyn from Eleni Mandell’s most recent album, Wake Up Again. Another great addition to her expansive, impressive catalog. The album is filled with rich character studies and deeply personal self-examinations.

Her early Tom Waits inspiration continues to ignite and propel her, even after 11 albums. Only now she can call Tom a longtime friend. 

And she went from obsessive punk rock X fan to counting a member of X as a member of her own band. What a cool, thrilling ride she’s had so far. Eleni Mandell. 

References and other stuff:

Eleni interview with Luxury Wagers

Eleni interview with Mr. Bonzai

Eleni interview with Tyler Pollard on Timeline

The bio from Eleni’s current website has a great write up on her most recent album and I quote from it in the episode.

No Depression review of Afternoon that I quote in the episode

Here is the original bio from Eleni’s old website that is now archived. I also quote from this

Eleni has been featured on NPR segments over the years. I did not use anything directly from these, but they are good and informative

Pop Matter review of Dark Lights Up

Good L.A. Times article about Eleni teaching songwriting to female inmates and her latest album

[my-emotional-self]

The Mission Chapter 6

Pairings: Ari Levinson x Reader

Warnings: swearing, fluff, sexual tension (I promise smut in future chapters! Don’t you worry!)

Summary: Ari Levinson tries to recruit you for Operation Brothers.  While you weren’t ready for any kind of mission, you obliged after much consideration. You didn’t plan on falling in love along the way.  But will Ari return those feelings? Or will his heart only be on the mission?

Over the course of the last two weeks, everyone worked tirelessly around the clock to get ready for the first mission to smuggle the Jewish refugees out of Sudan.  Ari made frequent trips to visit Kabede and check up on the refugees.  Wanting to go with him to meet Kabede, Ari refused; it was way too dangerous for you, because you were a woman.  As much as you protested, he wasn’t budging from his decision; but deep down you understood.  It was very risky for you and Rachel to be here.  

The day of the first rescue mission, Ari and Jake were fixing up the trucks getting ready to go. You stood by Ari, handing him the tools he needed.  Once Jake got the CB radio working, he was connected with the Navy ship.  

“They’re on,” Jake announced from inside one of the trucks.  

“Good,” Ari responded, jumping off the side of his truck he was working on.  He looked down at his watch, checking the time.  “Leaving here in 12 minutes.”

You and Ari made your way back into the hotel where Rachel was standing in front of the staff.  

“What did you tell them?” Ari asked coming up behind her.  

“That we are diving scouting spots and wouldn’t be back until the morning.”

“Good.”  The three of you were about to get ready for the mission, but there was what sounded like a very big vehicle coming towards the resort.

Heading outside, you all saw the large bus pulling in from down the road.  

Ari turned to Max. “Up on the roof.  Grab the spear gun.”  Max walked away, piling his sandwich into his mouth as you stood behind Ari.  From what you had gathered, the five of them have had some sort of combat training, but you didn’t.  You would be utterly screwed if any kind of fight broke out.  

The bus stopped right in front of the entrance and a bigger man came out of the bus, holding a clipboard with papers.

“This was not an easy place to find.  You should think about getting some better signage,” he said with a chuckle, dusting the sweat off his face with the back of his hand.  “It’s so hot in there, but with the windows open, all the dust flies in.” He had a German accent and Rachel moved forward.

She was speaking German, but you understood each work precisely.  “I’m not sure what you are looking for but I’m pretty sure this isn’t it.”

“Isn’t this the Red Sea Diving Resort?” the man asked, looking up at the sign on the front of the resort.  

“Well yes, but you see we are still under construction and won’t be open for a long time,” she replied.

“That’s not what the brochure said,” the man handed over a brightly colored brochure and Rachel glanced at it before handing it over to Ari.  Peaking over his shoulder, you could see why tourists would actually want to come here; the brochure really caught your eyes.  

The German man waved everyone off the bus and you retreated back into the hotel and into the room behind the front desk, knowing Ari and the rest of them would be joining you quickly.

You paced around the small room, trying to come up with a plan.  

“We have to check them in,” Ari stated as he marched into the room; everyone following behind him.

“No, I think we should send them in the direction of a real hotel,” Sammy pipped up.  

“Look, they were sent here by Colonel Madibbo and if they tell him what’s going on, our whole cover story could be blown.”  Ari looked at his watch.  “Fuck, we’re already an hour late.”

You stood up from the chair you were sitting on, ready to finally step in and do some sort of help since you hadn’t been able to help much yet.  “Let me check them in,” you stated confidently.  Ari looked to you, his brows raised.  “Seriously.  You guys get in the trucks and go get the refugees.  And Rachel, you can head back to your room and get started on the communications aspect.  I’ll man the front desk and the staff and get everyone situated into their rooms. Tomorrow, when the first operation is successfully over, we will begin running a fully operated resort.”

A slow smile crept up on Ari’s face, making your heart skip a beat.  He took two long strides over to you and picked you up into his arms; his hugs were the best.  “You are amazing!” he beamed, placing a kiss to your forehead.  

The four men headed out and Rachel went to her room to get her technology ready.  Taking a deep breath, you put forth a smile and walked out into the lobby; standing behind the desk.  

“How many rooms will you need?” you asked with a smile, folding your hands in front of you on the desk.

It took almost an hour, but all of the tourists were booked into rooms and resting before dinner. You went around, thanking all the staff, in Arabic, for their quick efforts of getting rooms in order for the guests.  They told you they were just happy to have the resort open and running again as it gave them a job and something to do.  You remembered Ari telling you at one point that when he leased out the hotel, he gave Colonel Madibbo an extra $100,000 for the residents of Sudan, but he made sure to tell Ari that it wouldn’t go towards paying the staff. You made a mental note to ask Ari, since now there were actual paying tourists, to use some of that money to properly pay the staff at the hotel; they truly deserved it for all their hard work.

Watching over Chef Aziz, you praised his cooking skills.  As he served the guests dinner, you snuck off into Rachel’s room.  

Knocking quietly on her door, you opened it before sneaking in quickly.  Her room was more homey than yours as she had placed some personal touches here and there.  There were photographs and small nicknacks placed around, which was something you wanted to do with your room now.  Maybe it would help you sleep a bit better at night.  

“How’s everything going?” you asked quietly.  

“I-I don’t know right now. Ari called for radio silence a few minutes ago and I haven’t heard anything yet from him.”

Your heart sunk, dropping to the pit of your stomach as you held onto the edge of the bed for support. No, this couldn’t be happening. The first operation couldn’t be a fail. As much as you loved your quiet life back home, Rachel, Jake, Max and Sammy, along with the staff were starting to really grow on you; let alone Aria.  The two of you had spent a lot of time together over the last two weeks preparing for the first operation.  And you couldn’t deny the fact that your feelings had grown for him too.  

Rachel sunk to her knees, head in her hands as Base kept asking repeatedly if Yacht One would copy.  Your knees gave out on you as you sunk to the floor beside her.  

“Yacht one to base, we copy,” Ari’s voice came over the radio and you blew out the breath you didn’t realizing you were holding.  

You grabbed a hold of Rachel’s hand, squeezing gently as she gave you a comforting smile.  Now there was nothing to do but wait to hear back from them; to see if the operation was successful.  

During the entire waiting period, you held onto Rachel’s hand.  Over the last two weeks, she became like a sister to you, which was soothing as you had always wanted a sibling.  

“Base is on the way home, with the entire cargo.  See you in a few days,” a voice said over the radio and you had to control yourself from screaming in happiness.  Both you and Rachel shot up to your feet, hugging each other before jumping up and down with joy; hands in the air.  

The two of you waited in the confines of Rachel’s room for the men to return back.  It didn’t take too muchlonger, as they were only a few miles down the coastline from where the resort was.  

There was a knock on the door and Rachel went to open in.  Standing on the other side was Ari, Sammy, Max and Jake; all with bright smiles. Rachel hugged Ari first before he came into the room.  The minute his eyes landed on yours, you burst into tears of delight knowing the operation was a success.  He made the few strides with his long legs to reach you, pulling you into a tight embrace as you sobbed into his chest.  

“174 people we saved tonight,” Ari whispered into your ear.

“That’s amazing Ari. I want to help save them all.  They don’t deserve the war and famine they are going through, nobody does.”  

You couldn’t help but to place your right hand on his head, your fingers weaving through his locks and scratching at his scalp, earning a low growl from him which turned you on like nothing had ever before.

“Now we can really celebrate!” Jake roared, causing Ari to pull away from you, but his hands stayed on you, placed at your hips.  

Looking up into Ari’s eyes, you smiled as his hand came up to wipe away your tears with his thumb.  “C’mon, let’s go get a drink and celebrate the success of the night.”  

Forever Tag List: @badassbaker @guera31 @tanelle83 @xjjlex @chrisevansfanfic @princess-evans-addict @joannie95 @pumbibaby @poerebel @patzammit @brastrangled @mrs-captain-evans @notyourtypicalrose @sfreeborn @esoltis280 @xxloki81xx @bornfortherainydays @livslookingforloki @raveviolet @southerngracela @the-wayward-robot @scuzmunkie @cinna-minseok @laura-gzz @beautifulrare4leafclover @emogeographics @chocolate-cutting @capslut2014 @songforhema @allsortsofinterests @firstangeldragonranch @bval-1 @softbibby @troublermalik

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[all-0f-the-above]

Gotham News @ 9

Can you IMAGINE the Gotham newscasters? No, not CNN, NBC, or CBS style with money and sets.

They're local news in Gotham City.

They have their chairs duct taped under their desks and old books making sure their desk doesn't wobble when they stand up to do weather.

Their graphics are mediocre at best; they're the mid-nineties ones that made you cringe, even at the time. They have a special sound effect and graphic for Mr. Freeze, one for Poison Ivey, and another for the Joker and Harley Quinn.

There are two main newscasters.

One grew up in the narrows. She's saw a newslady in the window of a department store when she was eight and immediately connected with the strength the well-dressed woman radiated through the screen. That was when people called her James. Now, the name that everyone calls her by and shows up on Gotham's public network is Julianne McLeod.

The other, Kendall Johnson, recently saw his already ramshackle apartment building collapse when they were on air. His mom didn't make it. He stayed on because there were other casualties and their families deserved to know. The next day, he came back because, "The Batman isn't the only one who can investigate Ggats Metalworks, you know."

The weatherman, Carl Lewis, is almost seventy and living on mostly social security. He got a degree in meteorology at Gotham University back before he lost one of his legs fighting for a war he didn't want any part of.

Their cameraman goes by John Jones, he's a quiet guy who mostly nods and smiles. They don't know much about the guys' past, they don't ask.

You'd never suspect any of it if you didn't know them. On air, off, and during collaborations with their sister network in Blüdhaven, they genuinely laugh at each other's jokes, missteps, and the general insanity of their hometown.

Although they're loved by thousands, the only things keeping them afloat are a meager cut of taxes, kind remarks on the street, and economizing wherever they can.

They were there before The Batman, back when Gotham Police Commissioners were ousted every month or so for corruption charges. Their scathing remarks towards City leaders that looked the other way when gangs ran rampant scared off any possible sponsors. It was a miracle Julianne's sarcasm alone hadn't gotten them sued yet.

During the day, when they're not briefing Gotham citizens about the crimes in their area, they play reruns of Full House and Friends.

This was back before Bruce stayed home with Dick, who had sprained his ankle trying to cartwheel away from one of Nygma's traps.

He figured he'd let his ward, who was grouchy from missing patrol, flip channels until he fell asleep. Except Bruce hadn't remembered his need to sleep, so he ended up groggily waking to Dick shaking his arm and starting intently at the screen.

"B, look, they're talking about us!" Although he had only the light from the TV to see, Dicks smile was plain as day.

Pivoting his head, he saw a man and woman reporting on their latest attempt to stop The Riddler from destroying Gotham's nuclear plant. It wasn't the story that caught his attention, though.

"Chum," he turned face him, "where'd you find this?" He'd been in Gotham for the past four years now and in all that time he never once remembered seeing a local news channel.

"What, the channel?"

He nodded.

"Oh," the boy looked down and fumbled with the remote that was clearly too big for his ten-year-old hands, and pulled up the TV menu, "it's Gotham channel eleven! They're on, it says here, at nine every morning, evening, and day of the week."

Bruce was taken aback, but the young acrobat to his right plucked the words right from him.

"Wow, B can you imagine working every day, twice a day?"

Well, not his exact words.

"Don't give me that look," he chided, "I know you do it, but most normal people don't." He paused for a moment, "When do they get the time to do laundry? Or feed their pets? If they have pets... You know, speaking of pets, do you think we could get an-"

"You know the answer, Dick, Alfred won't take care of an elephant while you're at school."

"Quite so, Master Bruce." As if on cue, Alfred breezed through the doorway.

"But Alfie-"

"Nothing more, Master Dick, I do believe it's a school night and Master Bruce had kept you up long enough."

Had he? Looking at the clock, it was half an hour past Dick's bedtime. Damnit, Bruce.

"That's right, Dickster," he stood up, his back bones cracking and old injuries protesting, picked his surrogate son up, and held him as one would a baby, careful to avoid the boy's sprain.

He harrumphed and crossed his arms, getting ready to make a point, "Only if you go to sleep now, too." He was staring down Bruce with the same intensity as he did towards Nygma just last night. He wasn't giving this up easy.

Well that surely wasn't going to happen, he had to figure out which shell company was connected to Simon Stagg, how to prove it, then hack into and locate the plans for the business's headquarters. Not to mention that tomorrow he needed to talk to Clark about Lexcorp's latest moves into Star City and how to best anonymously fund a public broadcasting station he didn't realize existed until just now.

Turning around, he saw Alfred, one eyebrow raised, arms crossed, and one hand holding a polished silver tray. There was no winning, this was the same man who had literally tried to give him sleep drugs in his coffee earlier that day.

"Alright, kiddo, just this once." After all, it'd the first time in the weeks he'd go to sleep at night and without being drugged by Alfred, a rogue, or after being knocked out.

Dick smiled and raised his arms in victory, "Onwards!" he pointed towards the stairs.

Although all of his actions were oriented towards getting him and his ward to sleep, he couldn't stop thinking about the dedicated news service operating under his nose for the past four years.

He'd have to push back that WayneTech meeting and his investigation into possible aliens in Gotham (which was a far fetched idea in the first place) in order to talk to Clark and get Lucius on the phone. After all, he had no clue what local news stations needed.

"You should talk to Ms. Lane, too," came a tuft of black curls masquerading as a head barely sticking out underneath several quilts.

Had he been thinking aloud again? Shit, he really did need to go to sleep.

"Maybe I will, Chum," he assured the young acrobat as he flicked off the lights and headed down the hall to his Egyptian cotton sheets and silk pillowcases.

[yurtletheturtlehenderson]

S.T. REWRITE - S2:E3; Chapter  Three, The Pollywog - [Pt. 3]

A Will Byers x Reader Series

Dustin adopts a strange new pet, and Eleven grows increasingly impatient. A well-meaning Bob urges Will to stand up to his fears while Y/n’s powers grow stronger, bringing to light many questions about her past.

A/n: Another long chapter ahead, featuring a callback to book 1!

||3rd Person POV||

El laid still and unmoving on her bed, where she had been since her fight with Hopper. He had left hours ago and she had been left alone with her thoughts once more.

She gazed at her reflection in the TV set that was still in her room from the other day. She sat up, thinking. She wasn't in the mood to watch TV, again. But maybe she could look for Mike again?

Her eyes glazed over the bed frame and they spotted the blindfold, and she quickly tied it over her eyes. It wasn't until then that she realized it wasn't 3:15, he would still be in school.

El sighed, taking off the blindfold in defeat. Hopper's words from earlier popped into her head.

"You're gonna see him. Soon. And not just in that head of yours. You're gonna see him in real life."

So El decided would. She got up, grabbing one of the warmest pieces of clothing she could find. She ended up putting on an old flannel that Hopper had washed and given to her.

With timid steps, she crept out of her room and slowly towards the front door. She knew she wanted to this, she had been dreaming about doing this for months, but suddenly it all became very real to her.

She faced the many locks on the front door. They were there for her protection, of course, not for keeping her in. She recalled the day she had been brought to live at the cabin.

[FLASHBACK]

Hopper swung the old door open, and before stepping inside, began kicking the doorframe with each foot, shaking off all the snow. He stepped inside and discarded his jacket, while Eleven, repeated his actions by kicking the snow off her shoes.

She began looking around at the dusty and cluttered cabin. She could see the beams of light streaming in from the dust that littered the air.

"My granddad used to live here, long time ago." Hopper shut the front door, preventing any more cold air getting in, and discarded his hat. "I mainly just use it for storage now,"

El listened as she walked slowly through the cabin, trying to take it all in.

There were boxes everywhere, and cloth-covered all the windows so it made the cabin quite dark. There were cobwebs everywhere.

Hopper walked across the room and picked up one of the old boxes, and moved it. "Lot of history here,"

Sighing, he put his hands on his hips and shrugged.

"So, uh... what do you think?" He asked. "It's a work-in-progress. You know, it's, uh... it takes a little imagination, but uh... once we fix it up, it's gonna be nice. Real nice."

There was a small pause.

"This is your new home," he confirmed.

Hopper smiled kindly at Eleven and she looked at him, a new sense of hope blossoming in her chest.

"Home," she answered.

+++

Hopper quickly rifled through the box of old records he had stumbled upon until he finally found one that caught his eye and painted a grin on his face.

It was Jim Croce's "You Don't Mess Around With Jim"

He pulled it from the selection and showed it to Eleven, who had found a place to sit.

"All right, this," he pulled the record from its sleeve and put it on the record player. "this is music,"

Eleven looked at him skeptically, not knowing what to expect. Hopper put the needle on the record and the rhythmic sound of bass and drums began to play, Hopper snapped his fingers in tune with the music.

Eleven watched in stunned silence as the usually grumpy man began to bounce around with a large toothy grin.

"Uptown got its hustlers The Bowery got its bums"

Eleven's brows furrowed softly as she watched the man continued to bounce. His face was scrunched up now and he began to sway his body, something that confused Eleven even more.

"42nd Street got Big Jim Walker"

"All right,"

Hopper suddenly clapped his hands together and spoke, seemingly returning to normal.

"Let's get to work,"

"He's a pool-shootin' son of a gun Yeah, he's big and dumb As a man can come"

Eleven ripped the old cloth off the small bed, unintentionally whipping a thick cloud of dust in her face. She was sent into a coughing fit.

"But he's stronger than a country hoss"

Eleven was trying to sweep while Hopper cleared out the boxes. Having never used a broom before, she was attempting to sweep by pushing the broom forward, and in turn, wasn't making much progress.

"But he's stronger than a country hoss"

Hopper ripped the old and tattered pieces of cloth off one of the windows, soft morning light spilled into the room.

"And when the bad folks All get together at night"

Hopper glanced over in Eleven's direction and noticed her attempts at sweeping. He gently pulled her aside and asked for the broom.

"You know they all call big Jim 'boss' Just because"

Hopper pulled the broom back in swift motions, showing Eleven through demonstration. She watched carefully.

"And they say You don't tug on Superman's cape"

Hopper was knelt down on by the front door, as he screwed in various locks to the front door as an added precaution.

"You don't spit into the wind"

Eleven had now grabbed the broom from Hopper's hands, getting the idea. She began sweeping, just as he had and Hopper returned to the boxes.

"You don't pull the mask Off that old Lone Ranger"

El plopped down on the bed she previously been cleaning, bouncing up and down as tested the mattress. She looked to the tiny red lamp they had found and plugged in and began to feel more at home already.

"And you don't mess around with Jim"

Hopper had set up the old CB radio he had found, and was teaching Eleven morse code. This was how he would contact her from outside the cabin, and she would always have a guide to look at for reference.

"Well, outta South Alabama Come a country boy He said I'm lookin' for a man named Jim"

Hopper was now stocking the kitchen with groceries and kitchen supplies. Eleven had found an old jigsaw puzzle, and she happily got to work. It reminded her of Y/n, who had left Eleven some of her puzzles to play with while her and the boys were at school.

"I am a pool-shootin' boy My name is Willie McCoy"

Hopper cast a glance over his shoulder and saw how invested she was in the puzzle, and how much more relaxed she had become since they had arrived and he felt himself relax as well. He smiled to himself as he pulled the box of Eggos from the grocery bag and put them away in the kitchen.

"But down home they call me Slim"

Eleven repeated the sequence that Hopper had beeped in the CB radio, and he smiled at her. She smiled in return, knowing she had successfully translated the sequence.

"Yeah, I'm lookin' for The king of 42nd Street"

Eleven looked up from her puzzle, to see Hopper carrying in what she recognized to be a TV set and she watched hopefully as he set up.

"He drivin' a drop top Cadillac Last week, he took all my money And it may sound funny"

At night, Hopper had gathered some old mousetraps and made several adjustments to them.

"But I came to get my money back And everybody say, Jack, don't you know"

He knew he needed to take precautions to intruders or any possible threats. He needed an alarm system.

"You don't tug on Superman's cape You don't spit into the wind"

He attached bullet shells to each trap. Blowing away the piles of sawdust as he worked under the lamplight at the kitchen table.

"You don't pull the mask Off that old Lone Ranger"

He wound up the spool of wire around another nail in one of the many trees surrounding the cabin.

"And you don't mess around with Slim"

Eleven trailed curiously behind him as he carried the unwinding spool with him. Finally, he reached the tree with the mousetrap and softly took a seat on the ground, Eleven knelt down beside him.

Eleven was in charge of holding the wire cutters and he gestured for them, grabbing them and cutting the wire. She watched as he grabbed the end and rigged it into the mousetrap as he talked.

"Now, this is called a tripwire. It's like an alarm. You, uh, set it up like this. And then, anybody gets close, it's gonna make a loud noise like, uh, gunfire."

"Bang!" He said, and Eleven jumped back softly, causing him to chuckle.

He runs a hand over his face and he looked at her, growing serious.

"Those bad men aren't gonna find ya. All right? Not way the hell out here. We'll take some precautions. There's gonna be a couple ground rules."

[END OF FLASHBACK]

El recalled Hopper going over the ground rules with her. She could hear him still in her head. But she didn't care. She needed to see Mike.

She walked in front of the draped windows.

"Rule number one: always keep the curtains drawn."

El ripped the drapes aside, and pulled on the blinds, sending them straight up, sunlight pooled into the cabin.

"Rule number two: only open the door if you hear my secret knock."

Every lock on the door came undone with a series of clicks and El opened the door.

"And rule number three: don't ever go out alone, especially not in the daylight."

Her heart pounding, El stepped outside, into the fresh morning sun, and relished in the crisp autumn breeze. She quickly scanned the area, when her eyes found nothing but open space and an empty forest she knew it was safe.

She heard Hopper's voice once more in her head, and she cast one last glance at the cabin in hesitation.

"That's it. Three rules. I call 'em the, Don't Be Stupid Rules. Cause we're not stupid. Right?"

As El got further and further away, she could feel her heart hammering in her chest, increasing with every step. She stopped suddenly. Not in fear, nor had she changed her mind. But the tripwire. It was right where she remembered it. She glared at it defiantly.

"Not stupid."

She stepped over the tripwire and marched on.

||Reader's POV||

Dustin's trap swung open and we all leaned in to get a better look. My eyes bulged when I caught a glimpse at the slimy creature writhing around inside.

"His name is d'Artagnan." Dustin cooed, beaming at the gross slimeball.

I watched carefully as he took d'Artagnan from the trap and picked him up, still smiling warmly at him.

"Cute, right?"

"Uhh..." I trail off.

Dustin just rolls his eyes at me, and I hear Will give a weak chuckle.

"d'Artagnan?" Mike asks, ignoring our bickering.

"Dart for short."

"And he was in your trash?" Max asked, clarifying.

"Foraging for food."

"Awesome," I mumble sarcastically, less than enthusiastic at the thought that thing was crawling around outside my house.

"You wanna hold him?" He asked hopefully at Max.

She quickly shook her head several times. "No, no"

"He doesn't bite," Dustin insisted.

"I don't want to--" Before she could finish, Dustin had thrust Dart into her hands, giving her no choice but to hold him and she cringed.

"Oh, God, he's slimy!" She panicked and handed him to the closest person who happened to be Lucas.

He recoiled in disgust when Dart jumped into his hands.

"Ugh, he's like a living booger!" He was then passed to Will who gagged.

"Ugh, oh, God" I saw the look in his eyes, he was panicking and he turned to me, the closest person to him.

Oh no.

"No, I don't think that's such a goo-" Dart was writhing around in my hands and my face scrunches up in disgust.

Lucas and Max were right, he was slimy and he did feel like a living booger and my stomach twisted in knots. I felt like I could hurl.

I tensed up, and suddenly Dart let out a horrible screech that hurt my ears and it startles me, making me yelp and jump back in fear dropping Dart.

There was a scatter of worried responses.

Mike was able to catch Dart, and he is the only one out of us who is able to tolerate him. He picks him up to examine him and Dustin lightly scolds me and then reluctantly asks me if I'm okay.

"I'm fine," I grumbled.

"What is he?" Mike asks.

"My question exactly," Dustin replied.

He got out some books from his back and plopped them on the table.

"At first, I thought he was some type of pollywog," he began.

"Pollywog?" Max wondered.

"It's another word for tadpole." He clarified. "A tadpole is the larval stage of a toad."

"I know what a tadpole is," she deadpanned, and I chuckled slightly.

We shared a slight smirk.

"All right, then you know that most tadpoles are aquatic, right?"

He opened up on of the books to a bookmarked page, I glanced at it and I made out the words 'Frog Life Cycle' from upside down.

"Well, Dart, he isn't. He doesn't need water."

"Yeah, but aren't there nonaquatic pollywogs?" Lucas asked.

"Terrestrial pollywogs? Yep. Two to be exact."

He opened up another bookmarked page from a different book.

"Indrana semipalmata" he flipped to another page. "And the Adenomera andreae. One's from India, one's from South America. So how did one end up in our trash?" He concluded.

"Maybe some scientists brought it here, and it escaped?" Max wondered.

"Yeah, and no offense Dustin, but we don't know anything about him. And you just found him, how do we know he's completely safe?"

Before anyone can answer my question, Mike speaks up, his attention on Dart who Dustin let roam around inside the barrier of the coils from his trap.

"Do you guys see that?"

We all lean in to get a closer look. Mike was right, on either side, just above the base of his tail, something began... shifting.

'Okay, ew'

"It almost looks like something is moving inside of it," I said.

Mike adjusted the lamp so it was hovering over Dart. And once again, he screeched, exactly like he had before, startling all of us. I start to panic when he crawls over the barrier of coils and jumps off the desk. Dustin quickly catches him.

"Whoa. It's okay. It's okay. I gotcha little guy. I know you don't like that. It's okay" I stared at my brother in shock and confusion.

Lucas and I shared an uncomfortable glance.

"And there's another thing," Dustin said, perking up. "Reptiles, they're cold-blooded. Ectothermic, right? They love heat, the sun. Dart hates it. It hurts him."

My brow had quirked when I heard this.

'Heat. Of course.'

It happened again. It must have. When I held Dart I must have burned him or something by accident and that's why he reacted.

'Shit, I really need to learn how to control that.'

I tried ridding my brain of the thought and leaned in to get a better look at Dart as my brother spoke.

"So, if he's not a pollywog or a reptile..." I urged.

"Then I've discovered a new species."

I looked around as I took in the information. However, I noticed that Will had an odd look in his eye. I was about to ask him with the bell rang, startling us all. The six of us grab our stuff and file put into the hallway.

"We gotta show him to Mr. Clarke," Lucas suggests, and I nod my head.

"No, what if he steals my discovery?"

"He's not gonna steal your discovery," Mike states.

"Yeah, I really don't think he would," I add.

"You know. I'm thinking about calling it Dustonius Pollywogus."

I laugh. "I'm sorry, the what now?"

"Dustonius Pollywogus. What do you think?" He turns, asking Max.

She laughs and shakes her head. "I think you're an idiot."

"You know, when I become rich and famous for this one day, don't come crawling back saying 'Oh, my God, Dustin, I'm so sorry for being mean to you back in 8th grade. Oh, my God'."

I laugh. "Yeah, I don't think you have to worry about that."

||3rd person POV||

Joyce was more than happy to be surprised by her boyfriend Bob at work. He had shown up to work to surprise her and the two were currently enjoying a pleasant lunch on a bench outside.

"Last night was fun."

"Mmm-hmm." Joyce agreed with a warm smile on her face.

She hadn't felt this happy in years. Bob always knew how to make her happy.

"I'm sorry if I overstepped anything," Bob spoke, referring to his previous suggestion of moving.

Joyce was shocked to hear this. "No! No, you didn't." She assured.

He weakly smiled. "Okay. I mean... I... I like you so much. Not just you, everything that comes with you. Your family, your boys."

Joyce felt as if her heart would burst. She smiled at the man as he continued.

"And I hope it's not wishful thinking, but... I kinda feel like I'm breaking through with them. Not so much Jonathan. He's a tough cookie to crack, but..."

She smiled and nodded along. "Yeah,"

"But with Will, I don't know, I feel like we're connecting."

She grinned at the man. "He likes you, too."

Bob smiled hopefully at this. "Yeah?"

"Mmm-hmm. I can tell."

Bob smiled to himself and reached for his Dr. Pepper. He popped open the drink and it fizzled. His mind quickly wandered to the video he had found that morning and he suddenly grew nervous. Bob knew he wasn't in trouble of course, but he hated making her upset. But he knew she needed to know.

"Oh, there was... something else I was gonna mention, but... and it's not a big deal at all, but...I just noticed this morning that my JVC was a little dinged up."

Her eyebrows furrowed. "Your what?"

"The video camera."

Joyce seemed taken aback. She felt bad that his camera was shaken up but she knew that didn't sound like something the boys would lie about. Not her boys.

"Oh,"

Bob nodded his head. "Yeah. It still works fine and everything. I just...I went back and watched the tape... there were some older kids picking on Will."

Joyce set down her lunch immediately, and her expression hardened. "What?"

Bob carried on with a wince. "They scared him."

"Who were they? Were they the Zimmerman brothers again?"

"Um, I don't know. They were wearing masks or sort of makeup and... Maybe. They were the right age."

Joyce looked away and rage-filled her system. "I'll kill them. I swear to God, I will... I will kill them." She scathed.

Bob looked at her with adoration and pride. He shook his head slightly. "That's what I love about you. You punch back."

"And, I know this does not make any of that or what happened okay, but if it's any consolation, that friend of his, Y/N right?"

She nodded, unsure of where he was going.

"Well, she cursed them out something awful. I think she was ready to actually punch them." Bob let out a weak chuckle as he spoke.

Joyce felt a sense of pride. "Good. They have it coming to them."

She shook her head, still fuming from the knowledge.

Bob chuckled. "I was never really one to put up a fight. I struggled a lot like Will when I was a kid. With bullies. It's ones like us, that don't punch back, that people really take advantage of, you know? Really, rub your nose in it. Just a little bit more."

Joyce fell silent as she listened to Bob. She couldn't recall him being this passionate about something and she was listening, captivated.

"That's why, that's why it makes it all the more special. People like me, and Will. We are fortunate enough to find people in our lives that punch back. Like you, and Y/N. Will and I, we are some of the luckiest fellas on earth, cause we are fortunate enough to have people like you and Y/N around, and Will has you both. And me?"

Joyce smiled, and she felt all the anger melting away as Bob continued.

"Look at me now! I get to date Joyce Byers! Ha!"

A laugh escaped her lips and she smiled, leaning forward and pecking him on the lips.

And the two enjoyed the rest of their lunch together in peace.

+++

Tag List: @dickkwad @aimee-lucass @iblesstherainsdown-in-africa@miscellaneoustoasts @happyandlonely

DM me if you want to be added!

[ssa-lesbian]

the what if’s and if only’s

word count: 1.1k words

a rewrite of the hospital scene from s15e2, because i’m gay and agent jennifer jareau deserves better than the heteronormative bullshit that cbs gave her. also this is unedited because i wrote it in seven minutes charged by nothing but spite and loathing so pardon any mistakes

*minor spoilers for s15e2*

*takes the place of jj and reid’s conversation in the hospital*

“Spence, I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you. And when I said I loved you, I meant it.”

“JJ--”

“No. It’s not fair that I hurt you like this. I love you, but I also love Will and the boys. They made me who I am today, but so have you. You-- are such a big part of my heart.”

Spencer is quiet. JJ takes in a shuddering breath and squeezes her eyes shut tight, tears trailing down her face. She opens her mouth, as though considering her words, before licking her lips and forcing them out in a tight whisper.

“But I didn’t mean it, like that.”

“It wasn’t for me.”

A sob escapes JJ, and Spencer wants nothing more than to reach out and take her hand and squeeze it and tell her it’s fine, she doesn’t need to say anything more, doesn’t need to justify herself to him for something so delicate, but a part of him wants her to go on, to hear what he has been suspecting for years now. She finally opens her eyes, bright and brilliant blue, and forces a tight smile.

“No. It was--”

“JJ, you don’t have to.”

“No, when I-- when I was lying there, and I thought I was go-- going to die, I couldn’t stand knowing I left you. Left you with that, left you hurt. Because it wasn’t a lie, you know that. But when we were trapped, I saw-- I saw--”

She chokes and closes her eyes.

“I saw her. Emily. Every-- everything I said, it was true about her.”

Spencer takes her hand then and squeezes it, not knowing how to comfort her in her most vulnerable state. In his mind, he remembers when Emily first joined the BAU, the light in JJ’s eyes that shone whenever they were together, and he also remembers the darkness in Emily’s when Will came to Florida and revealed his and JJ’s relationship.

“It was so difficult, because I knew when I was so young, but no one wanted it. And with her, I thought-- I thought we would work out. I thought we could make it work. But then I met Will, and it was so easy to love him. He was everything I could’ve asked for.”

A pause, and then a hushed whisper.

“I gave up on her for him, but I still-- I still hoped--”

“When Doyle went after her, you came for her,” he says, “and you hid her.”

“It was never going to be the same.”

JJ’s eyes are glazed, and she has a tiny half-smile on her face, tears trickling down to frame her, as though remembering the ‘what if’s’ and ‘if only’s.’ Spencer tries imagining a young JJ, making her way out of her sister’s shadow, all alone in East Allegheny, Pennsylvania, no one to turn to, especially with the hostility she would’ve grown up with surrounding her identity. He squeezes her hand unconsciously.

“She changed so much, when she came back, it was like she had given up everything to become another Hotch. Don’t get me wrong, he’s great,” JJ adds in hastily, letting a small breathless laugh, and Spencer smiles slightly as she continues, “but it wasn’t her. It was like we were strangers.”

She tilts her head slightly, and from her hand, a weak squeeze. Spencer is silent, mouth dry. Her smile is tight yet so full of love, tears brimming her eyelashes.

“I love you. You are my best friend. You didn’t deserve this.”

“JJ--”

“Mommy!”

They both startle at the sound of Michael bolting into the room, Will popping out of the corner with Henry, and Spencer cannot help but notice the bags under Will’s eyes, the fear and worry still lurking there if not in his smile.

“Hey, sweetie!”

JJ tucks in Michael as he clambers up on her right side and clutches her tightly, and as Will chides him to be gentle with his mother and Henry approaches cautiously, Spencer slips out. He almost runs right into--

“Emily.”

“Hey, Spence, she’s doing okay! She’s gonna be fine.”

She smiles at him, but it falters.

“Spence?”

He remembers how she would perk up whenever JJ came to announce new cases; how she would always insist on partnering with JJ when away; how she would be the first to check in on her, especially after cases where the victims were young, blue-eyed, blonde women; how she only ever let her guard down around JJ; how her eyes were so dark at JJ’s wedding before leaving to halfway across the world; how she didn’t hesitate to come when informed of JJ’s kidnapping; how she was the one to comfort and then save JJ from Hastings; how she was the only one who knew what ‘blackbird’ meant.

“Spence?”

And maybe he isn’t the only one who recognizes that Special Agent Andrew Mendoza holds enough political sway in the D.C. metropolitan area, how much she would benefit from his status, and maybe he notices how much of her mother Emily has taken on, to change herself, to erase any of the ‘what if’s’ and ‘if only’s.’

“Spencer?”

“You’ve changed.”

She stares at him.

“What?”

He shakes his head, mentally slapping himself for saying his thoughts out loud. No matter what, her secret will die with me. That’s the least I can do.

“Sorry, it’s been a long day. You’re going to see her?”

The suspicion in her eyes is replaced immediately by sympathy, and she nods, softening.

“Yes, we have reason to believe that it was Grace who shot her, not Lynch, which would make her just as dangerous as her father.”

“Wait, Grace shot her?”

“The Glock casings from the Fosters match the ones taken from JJ. We’ll need her to confirm.”

Spencer sees it. In the depth of her eyes, slipping out from her layers of undercover CIA training and Interpol Chief experience, he sees it. A little piece of love, but something more.

“Okay, just--”

How does he say it?

“Just be gentle with her, okay? She’s been through a lot.”

“Of course.”

Emily, you have no idea.

[otherworldliness]

I R O N   M O U N T A I N

I walked up to the pens through the canted storm glow into the cathedral of dust the horses built over themselves with the wind and their circling and their eyes blazed that orange like the day's last light into the arena and threw their shadows around them and flickered and I got the work because how I edged up to the black and white one that likes to be a ass sometimes and I walked him down with him feinting side to side to side while his mane got all tangled in the glowing gusts and I stretched out my arms and backed him until he was in the corner but he didn’t run and I spoke to him and touched his neck flicking and nervous like lightning and when I got my arms gentle around his face and held it to my chest I could whisper to him there and I kept whispering until all suddenly the winds died down in him and the storms stilled and all their voices went quiet I can’t always make it happen like that but sometimes I can Mr. Moses walked up to me all

who the fuck are you and I said

hey Boss and he looked at me for a few seconds and he said

you run a saw and I said

sure can and he said

good I don’t need no more cowboy wahoos round here and I said

y’all got a room and he said

feed these horses and come up to the house and I said

OK Boss

at the headquarters Mauricio had Chile Colorado stewing in the big pot on the stove and he turned and looked at me and knew who I was but I gave him the sign and he acted like we were strangers nobody else was there from before Mr. Moses was drinking a beer and he said

what’s your name and I said

Major and he looked at me like what kind of name is that but he shook my hand and said

Major I’m William Moses and I said

good to meet you Boss

and he introduced me to Mauricio and Mauricio shook my hand and smiled at me and Mrs. Moses was in the living room reading the Sunday comics and listening to Emmylou on the record player and I knew right away we’d be pals Moses put me in the same room I used to share in the summers with John when the ranch was ours and I put my bag down on the boards of the floor and pulled the silver raven out of it and put it under the loose board so I could dream but then I remembered you and I had to sit down on the bed real hard and hold myself to keep all of my secret night from spilling out

I got up in the morning dark and turned the light on and the room was cool from the windows being open and the late August dark coming in and I pulled on my pants and shirt and boots and walked into the kitchen where Mauricio and Mr. Moses and another man stood smoking cigarettes and drinking coffee around the table and Mrs. Moses had a skillet full of eggs and sausage and their cigarette smoke whorled up around the tines of the elk antler chandelier over the table and Mrs. Moses said

Major this is CB

and I shook hands with the man who was skinny and tall as a Sotol bloom and Mr. Moses turned to Mauricio and said

you know the old fence at the west end with all those holes and Mauricio said

yessir and Moses said

why don’t you and Major go out there and fix that up we’re gonna need to move the mares over there pretty soon and Mauricio said

will do

the truck bumped along the road with the windows down and the morning light in the dust behind us bluer than prayer and Mauricio said still looking up over the road

I heard about Elle and I said

oh and looked down at the knees of my blue jeans because how there was always a silver knife chopping around in my heart and he said

I’m sorry Major are John and your parents OK and I said

we’re all about making it and he said

do they know you’re here and

my voice went away and he put his hand on my shoulder and took his old felt hat off the dashboard and put it on and I whispered

I’ll tell them

and we got out of the truck and he handed me some Mooremakers and we cut all the old wire down off the fence and rolled it up and put it in a big blackred mess on the bed of Mauricio’s truck and it scourged our shirts and raised up dark rusty scars and we pulled out the bright lines of new cable across the expanse and tied them onto the far H brace and hooked up the comealong and stretched them off the ground and made it where you could tap them and they’d sing wavy as Hank’s yodel and we tied them off to the close H brace and slicked them up to the posts and stays and Mauricio sang and two Prairie Falcons called down at us from where they held at the edge of a cloud

Mauricio and I redid fences for a month before Mr. Henry visited the ranch for the first time it was hot in the day and our sweat puddled into our shirts deep to where the Tiger Swallowtails landed on us to water I didn’t know Mr. Henry was coming and on the way back when Mauricio turned up the big hill to the main house my heart started flutterskipping because how I hadn’t been there since you were still here and the world wasn’t so full of all its black horse music and my heart still sometimes had doe deer lain down in the shadows of its trees like secrets I whispered

where are we going and he said

to say howdy to Mr. Henry

I looked up the hill and didn’t think I could be there but he said

he’s not a bad one Major

we pulled up into the gravel lot and the house swept out from us like a white bird to the cliff edge and the oak trees swayed huge around it in the light wind

Mr. Henry and Mr. Moses sat on the porch looking onto the valley below and when Mauricio and I walked up Mr. Henry stood and shook my hand and he said

James Henry and his voice was deeper than bullbellow and I looked up and said

Major

he looked at people that slow way like he actually saw them and his eyes were quiet and held me strong so that none of the ocean of night inside me had to leak out even though I was at our house and he turned to Mauricio and shook his hand and while I sat there and Mr. Henry and Moses talked I could feel your words coming off the white stucco walls touching my face like quail down but I couldn’t hear what you said even though I tried and Moses said to me

Major

and my eyes startled up I’m always getting woken up from something and he said

Mr. Henry wants to know if you can cut some firewood for the house and I said

yessir and Mr. Henry said

good then I’m going to go take a drive around the ranch but you all come back up for some dinner a little later tonight

Mauricio drove and CB was with him up front and Moses and Mrs. Moses were in the backseat and I rode in the bed with the dogs and Rhett was up close at my legs with his long coat and his warm and they were playing the country station out of Stockton in the cab and it came out of the yellow glow of the radio and deer floated over the fences like spirits under the high beams in front of us as we moved up through the smell of piñon smoke to the house that was shaking beneath all the weight of night and there was the first chill of autumn and the truck stopped and the dogs poured out of the bed in front of me in a falls and circled round Mr. Henry’s big lab whining and pawing and I said

come on there pups

and jumped down and Mr. Henry had the long table on the porch set and a fire in the hearth that was wide so I could of lied down in it and the mouths covering the walls moved in the flickering light like they were trying to say something but no sound came out but I tried to read what they said but they all spoke different and I couldn’t see long enough to tell but Mr. Henry sat at the end of the table smoking a cigarette and drinking wine and when he greeted us he buried the dark under the deep of his voice

evening

and he shook hands with us and gave Mrs. Moses a hug

Sharon I’m sorry my wife couldn’t help you out of being the only woman at the table and she said

please I’m used to all these men

and he poured us glasses out of an old bottle and it was wine that was like a velvet blanket and I said

thank you and he said

sure thing Major and the dogs trotted back and forth silently along the edge of light and Mr. Henry said

Major can you get the steaks off the smoker and I said

yessir

he’d cooked good thick steaks and he scalloped potatoes inside and made a Caesar and I liked that he was that kind of man that made friends with the people who worked for him and while we ate the dogs came one by one and laid down in the firelight that stayed bright because of how CB was nearest the hearth and kept throwing logs crushing onto the coals when it burned down and once I saw Mr. Henry watching the walls like he could see the mouths too but I wasn’t sure

Mr. Henry walked into the headquarters before leaving and said

you all got anything needs to go to town and Moses said

no sir and I said

give me a second and he said

I’ve got five

and I ran into my room and took out my book and wrote tell mom I’m ok on a page and tore it out and put it in an envelope addressed to John and ran back out and gave it to Mr. Henry and I said

thanks and he said

sure thing Major

I cut out the fire killed oak for three months I only cut the best trees when it was that right point of evening when the wind was always just right and the light would turn purple and flow down through the hills like water but I stopped cutting before any night got into it and then I hauled the wood down the mountain because that’s how he asked and I took the trunks and the thick boughs that hadn’t got burnt up but just got killed and I logged them and the logs that weren’t rotten I split and stacked and I got ten cords up against the adobe wall of the house before the night that I was out with Mr. Henry and Moses by the fire and everybody else was gone in and the first cold front of the year slid down over the land and sent the sparks from the fire spiraling southward about our legs and against the canvas of the coats we had on to keep out the shards from the cold and the Iron Mountain hulked further south still and we watched it pull the stars down close to it but it always stayed dark even though it took more of the light than we could and Moses was asleep in his chair so that it was just me and Mr. Henry and we’d drunk enough whiskey where our eyes turned to amber and opened up and could see the ghosts of the iron oaks up there swaying in the wind like silk and glowing darkly and he said softly

can you see them Major and I whispered back

yessir

do you know why you see them and I said

no sir

I want you to cut some logs from it

how I asked

I don’t know he said and I whispered back

I think I can figure it out maybe and he said

I think maybe you can too

I moved to the little cabin off from the main house and I forgot the silver raven but it didn’t matter because I didn’t sleep anymore anyways because the day was too bright to be able to see the ghost oaks and I kind of stole Rhett from CB not like I did it but Rhett just started sticking with me and CB didn’t care because of all the other dogs stuck with him Mr. Henry told Moses how I was going to just report to him and Moses said

OK

and I went up to the hills over the main house at night and tried with my chainsaw but it was like passing through air and I tried with my axe but it didn’t work either I kept going back but I didn’t know what to do and one day I got real sad and went down into the valley where the red oaks all bent like fire in the gusts of autumn and I strung all the biggest trees together with spiderweb to make a machine because I was trying to listen to heaven so I could hear you again but in the nights when I put my ear to it everything got all drowned by the clamor of God up there drunk and murmuring to himself in the dark and running into furniture I just wanted to hear you say goodnight like you used to I just wanted you to tell me again that I’m your good little brother and how you lovemelovemeloveme but I couldn’t hear you and the wind kept blowing and I laid down on the cold ground not remembering anything anymore except that you were here and now you are gone

I can’t figure out how I said into the receiver and he said

you can take a while and I said

alright and he said

just don’t worry too much about it and I said

OK I won’t and he said

are you doing alright out there in the cabin and I said

yessir Rhett stays with me and we keep that stove burning so it’s warm and he said

who’s Rhett and I said

he’s that red merle Aussie and he said

alright then Major I’m glad you’re keeping up I’ll see you all out there afterwhile

after we finished up dinner Moses asked me if I would shoot a deer in the morning early because he wanted to have some backstrap for when Mr. Henry came the next week and I said

I don’t have a gun and he said

you can use that 30 aught 6 I’ve got over there in the cabinet and I said

I’ll be up early

I walked down from my cabin later that night to the headquarters to grab a beer and when I opened the door into the kitchen CB was standing in the refrigerator light taking out a bottle and he said

you want one and I said

yes please

and he popped the tops and we sat down at the table in the dark and I said

where you from CB and he said

I grew up down 90 outside Sanderson and I said

so you’ve been out here the whole time and he said

I’ve been here for a while but not the Iron Mountain for long and I said

you’re family out there in Sanderson and he said

used to be but my dad died and my mom kind of split off after that I don’t really know where she is things fall down on this land kind of hard some times

and we sat in the dark and drank in silence for a while and he got up and the light spilled out of the refrigerator into the kitchen again and he got two more beers for us and I said

you know where the trapper piles up the bodies and he says 

yeah what of it and I said

them all piled and stinking those bodies they’re all through us

but I could tell maybe he knew but he wasn’t going to say and he said

how old are you

and I said 18 but he knew that was a lie

he went and got us each another beer because we were drinking too fast and said

time for bed

yeah I guess I better

I’ll be around 5:00 to get you

and I shook his hand and walked up the trail to my cabin

the cold was ringing when I woke and I got up and put some kindling onto the coals in the stove and stacked some logs on that and blew the fire going and I put on my thermals and my pants and a shirt and zipped my coveralls on over everything and there was a knock at my door and Rhett stirred up whining from my blankets with the fire flicker in his eyes and I said

come on in 

and CB walked in and said

morning and his voice made fog inside my room and he patted Rhett’s head and I said 

howdee

and he poured me some coffee out of his Stanley and I pulled my gloves on and grabbed the rifle and slung it onto my shoulder and shut Rhett in the cabin and we drove out a ways and parked the truck and walked up onto the mountainside and CB said

you stay here and glass the valley and I’ll go around and watch that other side and I said

OK

shoot a doe if you can

I nodded and lay down in the grass and watched out as the light came I kept having to switch my hands holding the binoculars because of how fucking cold it was and every time I stuck my right hand in my pocket I could feel the extra brass shells banded together to keep them from ringing

deer come out in the morning because of how they are the same color as it and you have to watch so careful because it’s like trying to see water in water but I finally got my eyes right so that I could see an old doe come through the dim and I took off my glove and switched the safety off and put the cross on her neck and the shell cracked open and the bullet went hurling out away from me to her

CB walked around from the other side of the hill when he heard the shot I don’t like killing deer because afterwards I can hear all that low thunder out of death’s horn and I try not to hear it but I can’t not after I brought it and I remember you telling me how it was what made the dogs whine in their sleep and how every now and again it gets loud so that car alarms go off in the streets I don’t like hearing the sound from it CB walked up and said

that’ll do

and we put a rope through her back ankles and pulled her up from the bough of an oak and cut her guts out and left them where they fell grey and steaming on the ground for the coyotes and CB said

Mauricio will make us some chili tonight and I said

hope so

and then I looked down at the bloody knife and I threw up on the dirt and CB just shook his head at me but I wiped my mouth off and got up and CB dropped the doe into the grass under the tree and I picked her up and put her on my shoulders and he said

come on crazyass

and we walked back up to the truck and I put her in the bed and her eyes turned to frost from the inside

the next evening I was walking water line and I heard the elks bugling at each other and I looked but I couldn’t see them because how the grey was down on the earth but then all of a sudden I saw first one and then another big bull come out from the clouds and when they walked their antlers tore up the fog so that they dragged all these ribbons of emptiness behind them through the air and I knew how to cut the ghost oaks I don’t know how but I just knew and I ran back to the truck and drove to the house and I ran in past Mrs. Moses and she said

where are you off to

but I ran past and into the room and I pulled up the floor board and took out the silver raven and I went and jumped in the flatbed that had the welder on the back of it and I drove it over to the barn and I got my chainsaw and filed all the steel teeth off it and I cut the raven into little pieces with the torch and welded them onto my chain and filed the lumps sharper than the moonlight and then I went and sat by the forest and time changed I watched the sun rise and fall and rise and fall until I lost count

I got so skinny sitting there all those days I needed the milk of your voice I needed the warm bread of your words but finally I saw the night anchor pulling across the world and it caught on the Iron Mountain and the dark stayed and I took my saw onto the hill and found the stand of ghost oaks all dark and gusting in the wind and I walked to them and pulled the saw going and set the blade against one and blue sparks burst like little galaxies everywhere and the sparks went through me like I was the one that wasn’t there instead of them and I worked the long night through and I had to keep going back and welding on more teeth because the silver wore down so fast but I cut a little stack and laid it invisibly next to the other logs by the house and at the end I fell asleep beside the wood and Rhett was sleeping there too and the night closed all its eyes and came over close and lay down against us to keep us warm

I mailed Mr. Henry a letter

I figured out how to cut it

I made a silver blade

Moses let me take a truck into town and I pulled up to The Blues where there was a fire burning out of some shitty lumber stinking up the air and someone was singing old Marty Robbins inside and people were turning on the dance floor in quick circles through the spindled light that the disco ball hauled through the cigarette smoke and I walked over to CB and he slid me a bottle of Jack across the rough boards of the table and I slugged on it and slid it back and he said

look who’s out tonight and I said

howdee and he said

you gonna have a time and I said

might turn that way

and then the warm of the whiskey went through me and the world got soft and dark and I looked up and saw her there in the glow of the can lights and she looked all alone and quiet from the others and she wheeled from me and then back again and our gazes caught together across the room in the breeze from the song and I couldn’t even see who she was with but when I tried to look away our eyes got caught up like wind knots and I couldn’t turn she had on a dress covered in horses and the song ended and another fast one was on and it was just like that that she was in my arms and laughing and we turned like a dust devil all over the place and the horses went and bucked and galloped across the cloth plains of her dress and the sea of night inside of me flashed away for then because how she took my loneliness in her hands and pushed it away she said

lets get out of here and I said

OK and she said

come on then

and we ran out to the truck and drove west down 90 out there to old Nopal where the heavens push down hard on the earth and pulse and blaze and it was just us sitting there with the truck engine shaking and she kissed me so delicate that I couldn’t figure out what was happening how the softness hit me all brutal everything bunched up and the red lights flashing on us as that train went by in the night the horn blowing so loud that the dark got ripped away and the ground shaking and we were just alone there and it made it where I felt like horses loose on a highway or like moths like grass burning and there was all that flint in us that was rubbing along our ribs when we breathed and I thought it might have been light that filled us but I didn’t know for sure I never know for sure and then she took her dress off and her body was the moon and all at once the air filled with the ghost lights swarming and near and they circled round us like little stars and brought close their burning faces to whisper to us every name of night and they passed over again and we lay there holding together breathing like we’d run miles and we grasped to each other while our shadows turned circles around us always behind us to the lights and as fast as they were there they left again and the cab of the truck exploded into dark except for the soft waxing of her body

Lucia came out to the ranch the next weekend in her dad’s flatbed because I told her about the ghost oaks and she said

let’s burn some and I said

OK

she drove out on one of those days where it was real cold out and the clouds were down low and were rubbing off on the hills so that the grass and trees turned silver and thick with frost I already went around with Moses breaking the ice off the water tanks and there wasn’t anything else to do because it was so damn cold

she came into the cabin and Rhett walked up against her leg with his head up so she could pet him

who’s this she asked

oh you mean Stinker Bell there

she’d sat down and Rhett was nuzzling up in her lap and she was making those noises at him that people make with dogs and I walked over to the ice chest and got us out some beer and brought it and gave it to her and I said

his name’s Rhett and she said

well hello Rhett and I said

he’s got two different color eyes

and she pulled me down with them and kissed me

I cooked venison and we ate and when we were done I went and got the logs from outside first I lit red oak and then I burned piñon and after that I lay the dark ghosts of the old iron oaks onto the bed of coals and I understood why he wanted me to cut them it makes the smell like a chapelfull of myrrh smoke but the warm of it doesn’t touch your skin or your face but it sounds into you and calls all the wild and tender things that hide high up on the game trails in your heart down and it makes the moon rise through the dark of you like a mother of pearl disc and all the creek beds in your soul fill up with cold water

we lay there naked in that warm on the Navajo rug in the cabin and the ghost fire came out of the stove like snow light and the small brown spiders crawled out to us through the shadows and wrapped us there in their silentest silks and we didn’t have to be afraid of anything anymore because how in that garb not even the night can see you

she stayed with me in the cabin for three nights and every word she said had a bunk where I could lay up and sleep for a night she’d say

Major

and take my hand and put it down between her legs where the warm ocean was only barely inside her and she would pull me down and as I rocked in and out of her our hearts sloshed back and forth so full of stars that death was with us too we got so close and I knew she couldn’t stay forever and that evening we walked outside and she washed the creek in her hair and then the stars got hold of her and tossed her nightward and she flew up and up and she didn’t fall and I knew how she had to leave because she was the moon but I’m getting too used to all these leavings

that night my dreams rode in in the dark their horses the color of flood water under a flashlight and the dreams breathed as hard as the horses and their breath got so hot when they whispered close it made my ears ring all I could hear was how God talked in symbols but I already knew that and I kept wincing away into my blankets because it was like when someone breaths real hard on a microphone turned up too loud but I wanted to hear but I couldn’t hear what they said and I whispered out to them

tell me if you can pray to just one part of God and maybe can He keep it secret from the other parts of Him like could I ask Him to open my dreaming eyes and help me find the heavens I hid in myself but lost

and my dreams bent their heads to me

but ask it from the gentle part of Him and not the part that’s always drunk and angry and would open all my eyes and then burn nightmares into them forever

and my dreams leaned in close

like sometimes He seems to like answering prayers as mean as He can and I just want to find the God that’s actually better at being good than us not just the one that says He is

and my dreams put their heads against my head and ran their fingers through my hair until I fell to sleep in sleep

the next afternoon I saw the fire start I knew it was coming because how the ground was so dry it smelled like rain even when I pissed it was the storm with no rain that did it I tried to stop it I said to the wind and I said to death and I even said to God but none of them were listening I was cutting cedars on the hill but I saw all the smoke column up and I dropped the saw and ran down the road and I ran so fast that my breath fell behind and I took off my coat and kept running and my mouth tasted like it got full of pennies and I found CB but I couldn’t say anything and I had to hunch over there to let my breath catch up with me

you crazy fucker he said

but I caught my breath and I told him and he said

where and I said

by the gate

he was in a valley fixing up a hole in the fence but he climbed the hill with me and he saw the smoke because the fire got big while I was running and he said

how the fuck did that get started and I said

I tried to stop it it was the storm I tried to make it go away but he said

nevermind

and ran down the hill and started his truck and raced up the road to go get the firemen I guess and I ran down the hill after him but now my legs felt funny and I said

shit

and had to slow down but I kept trying to go fast so I could find Moses but the sun started sliding down and the edge hit the earth and the fire got bigger and even though it was night now the wind kept rising and the smoke made my head ache and behind me the mountains flickered and in front of me the tree shadows swung around in the light but then I had to stop because the hills turned into a gold river and my eyes were spinning around and I had to sit down and make the world stop so I could go again and then it stopped and I ran up to the headquarters where there wasn’t a light on and I knocked on the door anyways but no one was inside and I kept turning around to see the fire get bigger and the smoke smash against the Iron Mountain

prow of the earth I whispered breathlessly up to it

I couldn’t let the house burn I had to not let it burn Elle got born there and when we were young and she’d never been too jealous of the dead she would laugh so loud and blazing white as the stars that the rooms and the halls would get full and silver and you could see them there glowing if you were out in the night and it would bring you back from whatever trouble sort of thing you were about and now after I got all the rivers in me full up with tears it’s the only place left where I can go hear the shadows that her laughing cast and not have to feel sadforever

I ran up to the dozer and tried to start it but it didn’t start because the batteries were dead because nobody had driven it since who knows but the flatbed was there so I brought it over and turned the welder on and I put the ground on the black and the lead on the red and turned the key of the dozer and the engine rolled over like a fuckcrazy horse and the lead off the welder made burning stars shoot all over the place from the battery and I jumped down on the flatbed to turn the welder off but it was already stalled 

piece of shit I yelled at it

and jumped back up on the Cat and put it in reverse and gunned it because bulldozers run fastest backwards I don’t know why but it still wouldn’t go fast enough but I turned it towards the house and the tracks that had got rusty sitting there were polished like mirrors after the heavy thing touched them on the ground and I could see the stars that were living in them and the flint under the treads burst out with sparks to light my way

I got up to the house that was glowing clear white like the moon even though the fire snaked next to it huge and orange and the smoke flowed over the hills like the world was coming apart and the wind pushed the grasses into waves and the fire was twice higher than the house when I came up and spun the dozer the treads shrieking like giant barn owls and dropped the silver blade into the earth and rammed a wide swath of clean dirt between the house and the fire and the engine all low down growled and the turbo whined and the exhaust went dark in the dark and filled the woodsmoke air near the house with diesel smell and I screamed

COME ON FUCKING COME ON

and I got one break down when the fire got there and a second break started and everything was swirling and full of bright and dark but the fire jumped my line into the meadow by the house and I tried to chase it but the wind turned it huge so I couldn’t chase it and the flame surrounded me and I killed the dozer in the middle of the firebreak and jumped down and ran into the courtyard of the house hoping that the walls would hold long enough for the flames to pass but the oaks were too huge and hot and the herd of bright red horses ran all along the floors up the walls and set the paintings on fire and I went to the fountain to lay inside it but the fountain was empty and I yelled to you

HELP ME

but I couldn’t hear you and I turned to the flames

no please no

and I ran out the back of the house but the flames were at every side and I jumped out off the deck over the cliff into the night below and I dropped and dropped and went through some tree to the ground and my head spun to darkness

I found the rock pool at the edge of the meadow that’s never in the same place twice and I got in the cool water and drank the bottle of whiskey from the stone edge and my liver turned to ember and glowed into the water and you walked into the dark gold light like from out of nothing and I knew you were my dream but how it didn’t matter and the stars still saw your face and got drunk off it and I watched them lose their ways and stray through the black up there staring down at you and you said you could talk to me for the night only but that was all and I thought that was ok it was ok and all again you held me and I was shaking but all I could tell you was about how I keep trying to build the heaven in myself so you can come be with us again but I have to make sure it’s hidden enough that it doesn’t get broken but how it’s so hard because I keep not being able to find it after I hide it and I have to start all over again and you whispered to me 

it’s okay Major   it’s alright

and your voice was quieter than smoke so I could hear and I heard you but I couldn’t keep you there and I wanted so bad to keep you there

I woke late the next evening and I heard CB and Mauricio yelling my name on the cliff top and I whistled back to them and Rhett ran down the hill to me and licked my face where I lay and they came down and CB said

you crazy motherfucker and I said

I think my ribs are busted

and he looked at the cliff and he said

yeah I bet they are

and they helped me up and half carried me and lay me on the back of the truck and my sides pulsed like shards of suns when I breathed and the house was burnt and smoldering and Mauricio got into the pickup bed with me while CB drove slow down to headquarters that was still there and they had the horse trailer hitched in the driveway I think they all thought I’d died or something because Mrs. Moses ran out crying and Moses told me how they’d followed the dozer tracks up there in the night and yelled and how I hadn’t said anything back and I said

I guess I was sleeping

my head ached so bad with all the night crashing around in it and Moses said

we got to get these horses out of here but they’re kicking up a storm in that trailer and I said

it’s because they got too much fire into their eyes and they all looked at me like they always look at me but I got off the truck and limped through the yard under all the stars that were falling in flurries now and I got up into the trailer with the horses and they stilled down and I said

close that up and keep the light on in here

and they did it and the fastener screeched as they pushed it down into place and the truck started up and I was surrounded with the heavy smell of the horses and I leaned against the black mare and winced at the bumps and all the stillness in the horses asleep in the lit trailer hauling through the dark filled me up and I could feel the massiveness of heaven just out there heaving breath in and out and how alive it was and how I just had to find a pure place to put it into the world and then we just had to believe in it and love each other even though we’re all the ruined but we still can love even though our hearts are wrecked and that’s what I had to know so I whispered every heaven that I could find to the mare and I thought that the ocean of her heart would keep them safe but I didn’t know anything for sure I never know anything for sure

[voltronseatbelts]

Love Song in C Minor - Chapter Nine Bonus Scene (Keith’s POV)

Read the main fic on AO3

Summary:

Sendak pauses and glances between Keith and Lance. He nods at Axca, who pulls out one more paper.

“This is our solution. A fake romance between Keith Kogane, upcoming lead in Love on Daibazaal, and Lance McClain, leading man of Voltron.”

The silence that overtakes the room is deafening. Keith freezes and Lance’s jaw drops when Axca lays the paper down in front of them. Across the top is a mock headline: All You Need to Know About Hollywood’s New Darling Couple: Lance McClain and Keith Kogane.

Lance wakes up single with a hangover and goes to bed in a relationship with a stress migraine.

Bonus Scene Excerpt:

"Okay. Well, go on, Kogane. Like you said, I have a flight and some beauty sleep to catch up on.”

"Like you need that," Keith scoffs and rolls his eyes. He catches sight of Adam waving the chopsticks again, this time pointing to the extra seat on Keith’s side of the small dining table. Keith bites the inside of his cheek and steels himself. "Actually—I was wondering if you wanted to come over for dinner."

A few beats of excruciating silence. Then, "What? …You know I'm in New York, right? The Big Apple? The Los Angeles of the East Coast? Where you were not a day ago?”

Word Count: 1.5k 

Read the main fic on AO3

Keep reading for the bonus scene.

"Keith," Shiro's gentle voice says, cutting through the muck in Keith's brain.

"Nope," Keith mutters.

"Keith," Adam echoes from across the table. He sets his chopsticks down and folds his hands under his chin, leveling Keith with an unimpressed stern look Shiro's never been able to fully master. Reluctantly, Keith glances up from his phone. "You should invite him over for dinner.”

"What?" Keith scoffs, shoving the device to the edge of the table. He stabs at a chunk of rice and shoves it into his mouth so he won't be forced to say anything more.

"You're clearly already talking to him. If he's here, then you'll pay attention to dinner and talk to Lance.” He picks up his utensils again.

"Uh, no." Keith points to the still woefully blank phone. "He's not answering me anymore. Also, I'm not five years old. I'm not beholden to paying attention at dinner."

Shiro sighs long and deep at that, and Adam pats him sympathetically on the shoulder.

"Wouldn't it be nice to meet him properly, Adam?" Shiro asks as he takes Adam's hand in his own. "The last time and only time we saw Lance in person, he was—”

"I thought you said we wouldn't talk about this anymore!" Keith interrupts, jabbing a chopstick in Shiro' direction.

"—shoving his tongue down Keith's throat, and—”

"There was no tongue!"

"—he seems nice enough, but I didn't even catch a last name through them sucking face."

"Please, don't say sucking face ever again," Keith groans, burying his face in his hands.

"I wholeheartedly agree, Shiro," Adam says. "He's Cuban, right? I think I have a Caribbean cookbook around here somewhere. Maybe there's something in there he'd like."

"He's not coming for dinner." But at that moment, the phone vibrates. Keith and Shiro dive for it at the same time, but Shiro's just a millisecond faster. He snatches it and raises it high in the air.

"You get this back when you call the boy and invite him for dinner," he says, waving it around as he talks.

"Give it back! Why are you guys so stuck on this? He's not even here! He's in New York right now!" Shiro tosses the phone to Adam, who unlocks Keith's phone and opens the message.

"Lance says ‘You still text with no personality, but I appreciate the sentiment nonetheless,'" Adam reads, then purses his lips and nods. "Yeah, I like him. He should come to dinner."

"That's rude!"

"Oh, look. Shiro, there's a call button on this phone. Should I...press it?" Adam's thumb hovers ominously over the button, an innocent expression pasted over his true evil nature. Keith shoots out of his seat and practically vaults over the table, but Adam chucks the phone back to Shiro, and Shiro stands up and raises it over his head.

"Curse you for being tall!" Keith growls, jumping once to reach for it before realizing it's a futile attempt. "Don't call him! It's late over there!"

"Oh, it's late?" Shiro says with a raised eyebrow. "I don't think I've ever heard you worry about a time zone before. Actually, I distinctly remember you calling me in the dead of night when Adam and I went to Paris." Shiro and Adam exchange a look Keith doesn't want to understand, and Adam nods almost imperceptibly. Shiro presses the call button and lowers the phone to his ear. 

"Don't you dare," Keith hisses. He can hear the soft ringing and swings for the phone again—but it’s too late.

"... Keith?" a faint, tinny, distinctly Lance voice asks.

Shiro beams. “Lance, hey! This is Shiro, actually. Congratulations on the second single!”

Before the conversation can go any further, Keith shouts, “Give me the phone, you fuck!” and wrenches it out of Shiro’s hand himself. He stumbles back a step and flips the bird to Shiro’s stupidly amused face.

"Hi, sorry about him. It’s me, Keith," Keith says into the receiver, slightly breathless, and he cringes when he hears his own words. Shiro smugly puts his hand on his hip and returns to his seat.

"I can tell by your voice, dummy. Why did Shiro call me on your phone?" Lance asks.

Before Keith’s mouth starts working again, he closes his eyes and tries to breathe evenly. It’s been one day. One whole day, and he missed Lance’s voice, the honey lilt of it, the teasing edge. This is a new low for him, and Adam’s raised eyebrow agrees.

It’s not his fault. They’ve been together practically every day lately, and Keith’s gotten used to it in his ear, high-pitched when offended and sultry when looking to offend. Hearing it again just…takes a second to digest.

"I, uh—" he stutters. Adam taps his half-finished plate with the chopsticks and Shiro points between them. Right. Dinner. "I actually. Had a question."

"Oh, really?" Lance hums. "And you didn't feel like answering over text?"

"I…guess not.”

"Okay. Well, go on, Kogane. Like you said, I have a flight and some beauty sleep to catch up on.”

"Like you need that," Keith scoffs and rolls his eyes. He catches sight of Adam waving the chopsticks again, this time pointing to the extra seat on Keith’s side of the small dining table. Keith bites the inside of his cheek and steels himself. "Actually—I was wondering if you wanted to come over for dinner."

A few beats of excruciating silence. Then, "What? …You know I'm in New York, right? The Big Apple? The Los Angeles of the East Coast? Where you were not a day ago?”

"I know that, idiot. I mean, like, tomorrow, when you’re back. Or sometime."

"Please tell me you're not cooking.”

"No, Adam's cooking. Because Adam and Shiro will be here."

"Oh!" He sounds surprised. "I mean, oh-kay. Yeah. Yeah, I'll come over for dinner."

"Good."

"...Good. Is that all you wanted to say?"

It sinks in. Lance is coming to dinner. Shiro and Adam coerced Lance into coming to dinner.

He flips Shiro off again, just for good measure, but that doesn’t stop the corners of his mouth lifting into something that must be stupidly and illegally fond. Lance isn’t physically here, though, so he turns his back to Adam and Shiro and doesn’t bother to compress it into something else.

He wants to keep talking. Maybe like they do in the movies, like it’s the 80’s and Keith stretches the cord of the wall phone until he can shut it behind his bedroom door and say coyly, What are you doing?

But he can’t and he won’t. Too incriminating. Keith is not a giggly 80’s teen, nor will he ever be caught within a foot of something like it. He’s cool. He’s suave. He’s unaffected.

So, as he fixes his face into something neutral and turns around again, he lands on, “That’s all. I'll look forward to it."

"Me, too," Lance replies. "Text me when, okay?"

Across the table, Shiro and Adam fist bump, and Keith holds himself back from rolling his eyes again.

"I will. Uh, have a good flight. Don’t get Hunk sick again. I don’t think Coran ever got him Tums."

"No promises." Keith can practically see Lance's wink on the other end.

“Goodnight, Lance,” he says. Which means he’ll have to end the call. His thumb flexes, waiting for Lance’s last word.

“’Night,” Lance replies. It echoes in Keith’s mind as their phones disconnect.

Keith slumps in his seat and puts the phone face down on the corner of the table again to glare at the two criminals surrounding him.  

"I despise both of you," he says, picking up his chopsticks.

"You love us," Shiro says. "And we love you. You know that, right?"

"Whatever. Don't go all mushy on me."

Shiro and Adam exchange another look. Keith doesn't bother trying to decipher that one.

"Well, I'm excited to meet your boyfriend properly," Shiro says.

"He's not my boyfriend."

"Right. I forgot about that part."

Keith flicks a grain of rice and it sticks on Shiro's nose. Adam dissolves into giggles as Shiro goes cross-eyed, and the topic drops like a fucking miracle.  

Later, when Shiro's begun washing dishes and Adam takes his paper grading to the kitchen table to join him, Keith burrows himself into the living room couch with Kosmo at his feet, snoring softly. Well, as softly as an enormous mutt who might be half-wolf snores.

Since no one is around, he scrolls absently through Twitter. Absently, of course, until the posts of random people he couldn’t care less leads him to a recent one by Lance.

@lanceymcclain – playing tunes and talking to slav on cbs tonight @ 11:30 est! and REUNION is out at midnight, right after the performance! the return’s SECOND SINGLE!!! [Attached Image: All four members of Voltron behind Slav’s desk, mimicking his owlish demeanor with varying degrees of success.]

Keith finds himself smiling and automatically opening his text thread with Lance—and promptly turns his face into the cushions and silently screams.

Lance wouldn’t reply. He's probably asleep. And flying. It’s whatever. He shoves the phone between the couch cushions and sits up to preoccupy himself with scratching behind Kosmo’s ears.

"I don't know what I'm doing, Kosmo," Keith murmurs. The dog shifts once and continues snoring. "And you're no fucking help, either."

[stage-props]

Wow so he’s just Like That huh

Quick little Starlight drabble about CB partnering up with Rusty!

Word Count: 1673

Warnings: None

Also posted on a03!

Somewhere in the middle of nowhere, a happy little caboose casually rolled and weaved through a tightly packed crowd of racers, seemingly observing the crowd that had gathered around the track’s starting line. The chatter was of varying topics, some talked about the night’s events so far, some talked about the poor engine who’d derailed during the previous race, but the main topic was of switching partners. A couple of the trains had decided to return to the same partners as before, others were proposing switches to each other, and some appeared to be sitting and waiting for someone to come ask them to race at all. While looking through the crowd, the caboose spotted what appeared to be a very sad looking dining car sitting on the edge of the area looking at all of the faces.  ‘Oh, poor thing’  he thought to himself as he saw her wipe tears from her cheeks.  ‘I’ll go see her after, she’s probably needing a little cheering up.’  

Turning his attention back to the scene around him, he smiled and waved at the groups as he passed them. His attention was genuine, but only brief enough to be polite. In all honesty he didn’t care about those around him, more concerned with his reason for being here. He placed his hands behind his back and began scanning the faces of those around once again, drifting through the racers all the while humming a little tune. 

It did take a bit, but soon he finally found the engine he’d been looking for. 

Standing in the middle of the crowd looking like a child trying to find a partner for a science project in primary school, was Rusty. It was obvious he was there to find a partner for the race… but also just as obvious that he was most likely the only engine who didn’t have  anyone offering to partner up. 

‘Bingo!’ The caboose thought to himself as he gave himself a push and coasted over to his soon-to-be best buddy. 

 Rusty’s back was turned when the caboose skidded to a stop directly behind him. He put on his best how-do-you-do smile (though he practically already had in on already) and tapped the distracted engine’s shoulder. The tap wasn’t really..  received  well, because the moment Rusty registered it was there he jumped and nearly slipped off his wheels. 

That made the caboose smile more genuine and laugh, “Yikes! What’s with the nerves steam train?”

Rusty blinked a bit and laughed it off, “Ah it’s just you, um.. You..?”

“Red Caboose,” He saluted to the other, “at your service! Some of the others call me C.B..”

“Yeah! C.B., yeah I remember from the introductions.” the steam train shook his head, “I’m just not with it today I s’pose.”

“Race got you nervous?” C.B. offered.

“No! Well, yeah obviously but no that’s not..” He glanced around, “Hey, have you seen a pink coach around here somewhere?”

“Pearl? Yeah I saw her on the way over here!” 

“Oh really? Where-”

“Yep she was talking to one of the other engines, Electra’s his name! You’ve heard of him right?” 

Rusty’s entire demeanor seemed to deflate. “Ah… yeah yeah I've heard of him.” He scrunched up his nose and crossed his arms waving his head as he spoke mockingly, “Perfect-Electric-Engine-Of-The-Future Electra.”

C.B. cocked his head, “I take it you don’t like him?” 

“Of course I don’t!” Rusty snapped back letting out a groan, “I just don’t see what the big deal is! So what he’s electric what’s so great about that?”

“Well who doesn’t like superstar?”

“I don’t!” Rusty steamed.

“Eugh, don’t let his components hear that. You’d be even more unpopular than you already are.” He snickered a bit.

The steam engine didn’t seem to take it as anything to snicker about. Crossing his arms and pouting a bit he pushed back on his wheels, “Gee thanks for that.”

Caboose picked up that Rusty was understandably annoyed by his comment, but just let out a happy sound, “Ah come on Rusty!” He circled around him and wrapped an arm around Rusty’s shoulder, “It’s not like it’s a big secret that most everyone here doesn’t want you here.”

Rusty glared at him and shook the arm off, “Then why are you talking to me?”

“Hey Hey! I said most everyone didn’t I?” C.B. reminded him with a smile.

“Well.. yeah I guess.” He loosened up a bit. “So… you didn’t just come over here to smoke me out?”

“No! I’d never do something like that.” Caboose laughed, “I came to see if you had a partner!” 

His mood soured once again. “What do you think?” 

‘God this engine’s sensitive’ C.B. thought to himself, “Alright then, since you don’t have one and you’re obviously still set on this race, how’s about  I  be your partner?”

Rusty paused, “You want to race with me?” 

“Sure do! I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t want to.” He chuckled and idly rocked on his wheels.

Obviously it was a nice sentiment, but thinking of how the rest of the racers had treated him planted a seed of concern in his mind. “But, why would you wanna do that...?”

C.B.‘s cheery smile seemed to pick up his face even more, “Well why wouldn’t I? You seem like a stand up engine, and I know you want to race and, seeing as no one else wants to, I thought I’d offer! Got nothing else I should be doin’.”

Rusty finally seemed to brighten up finally trusting C.B’s sentiments. “You honestly want to?”

“Honestly!” Caboose nodded assuringly. “Y’know, I know I just came around but I like the way you think Rusty.”

“Feeling is mutual I guess.” He chuckled.

“So we’re buddies right?” 

“Yeah! We’re buddies.”

There was more to be said, but before either of the two could get out a word the booming alert music echoed around, followed by the familiar juvenile voice. “This is Control, this is Control. Only three hours remaining till the race to Denver to Las Angeles!” 

Rusty let out a groan and covered his face with his hand, “Ah geez, I’ve gotta go talk to Poppa before the race, I completely forgot!” 

He waved him off, “That’s alright, I’ve got some stuff to attend to myself!” 

Rusty “Then I’ll see you at race time?”

C.B. let out a satisfied huff and straightened up saluting to the other. “I’ll see you then good buddy!” 

As the rusty little steam train rolled away, C.B. smiled as he always did waving after him. ‘What a nice engine!’ He thought turning and rolling off back into the crowd. ‘Nice for sure.’ 

-

A stroll down the streets was nice, but oh god it was  so much  nicer when there weren’t any people to smile and wave at. 

C.B. got positively sick of having to repeat the same goodie-goodie greetings over and over again. He could honestly care less about how everyone was doing or whether or not they were ‘going to have a great race today!’ Ugh. Obviously no one else had to put up with that sort of crap, most of them were able to just ignore anyone who wasn’t important to them and even push them out of the way if they ticked them off enough. But, C.B.? He’d never had that sort of privilege. Well.. not outright at least. Not unless it was part of the plan.

Sometimes it wasn’t all bad, in fact often times there wasn't even a problem with how he needed to act. But there were days he just hated the fact that he had to be so nice. Some days it just grated on his nerves every time he had to muster up such a fake chipper smile for someone he couldn’t stand. This, happened to have been one of those days. But honest after all was said and done he wouldn’t ever complain too much about it. He knew very well that he wouldn’t have made it this long had he not been the way he was. After all, it really was a perfect cover up. Who would ever suspect the sweet little Red Caboose could ever POSSIBLY be capable of murder?

Anyway, the streets were now empty by some miracle. Probably more like everyone had gone to find a partner before the race than a miracle, but it felt like one to Caboose. Thankfully in the silence he could hear his own thoughts clearly once again. Mostly they were set on Rusty… the others were set on what would happen to him in the next race. That certainly was picking up his mood. 

C.B. coasted nonchalantly for a while just humming to himself, but slowly began picking up speed. The humming melted into little giggles, and then full blown laughter.

‘God that was just so easy!’ He laughed more and skipped along twirling in the air. ‘He’s so much stupider than I thought.’ 

Usually C.B.’s plans took at least a little more work to get started, but Rusty didn’t even hesitate that much to trust him! Obviously there was still the issue of whether he could get Electra and Greaseball on board with the whole thing, but that really wouldn’t be too difficult. Just guessing by how much of an ego those two had, all he’d have to do is to throw some compliments around and add an admiring look to his expression to get them believe anything he said. It almost seemed like it was too easy, maybe it wouldn’t be as fun seeing as it wouldn’t be challenging…

‘... Nah  !’ He spoke out loud before erupting into laughter once again. 

Despite how much he might hate it initially, he loved this part of his plans. The preparation, the lies, the blind trust, it just gave him such a rush! A rush that could keep him smiling at every stupid arrogant engine he needed to smile at.