#because no attraction to genders = same attraction to genders

[meo-eiru]

Hi Meru!

A previous ask made me curious, but how would Elias react to a male-darling? Any headcanons for an mlm interactions with him?

Thank you so much for blessing us with your wonderful blog ;-; . Your art is amazing and I would love to draw your characters as beautiful as you depict them.

Awh thank you so much🥹 Anything you guys draw is the most precious drawing to me

I thought about it quite a bit and I’m gonna be honest I don’t think the dynamic changes at all. Because the reason Elias fell for you, and his attraction to you were not because of your gender but because you are who you are. It’s like that with most of my ocs except maybe Micah since I made him with a nun in training darling in mind. But other than that your gender doesn’t change the story and dynamics much. Maybe the sex and the the go to positions would face a change but other thank that they all love you the same

[beforetimes]

my thoughts on the trans charles headcanon!

let me just start off by saying i love it. just to make that 100% clear at the beginning of this.

ok i think that charles being a trans man would change his relationship with the characters in the movies + his relationship with his mutation in the films as well. for one, i think that his first encounter with raven would hold more weight. because raven would be his first look at someone like him—a mutant—but also his first look at someone who was able to defy gender norms in a way he was unfamiliar with. i'd imagine that as a child he would be so isolated that he would assume his feelings in wanting to be anyone but himself [pre-transition] were inherent to everyone. and encountering raven changed that perspective but also drove home the fact that his expression of himself didn't change who he innately was. as raven changes how she looks frequently but at the end of the day, is still raven. i feel he would get his first realization that, ah, just because i look like a girl doesn't mean that i am one.

(i also like to imagine that his telepathy would be a tool for him to use before he's given access to the resources he needs to medically transition. it would work as a way to help along his social transition, maybe by subtly changing people's surface level perception of him if they were interacting in his youth. when he grows older and he does have the ability to medically transition, he would stop purposely affecting people's perception of him but that habit would be so engrained that it would subtly colour his interactions with the general public unconciously.)

anyway, i think the way this plays into his relationship with his sexuality would be fun, too! the flings he's implied to have in first class are obviously just superficial (as he repeats the same routine to pick up girls multiple times). we could argue is his version of comphet, if we're assuming he's gay, but the way he was raised makes him want to strive to be the person his parents wanted him to be. or the relationship of his sexuality with his gender identity and how he feels slightly invalid in his dual identity as a gay and trans man, because, to him (with internalized queerphobia), he would assume he's just taking extra steps to come around to liking men as a cis women.

besides that i think his relationship with erik would also change. because, like, i like to work with the idea of erik being a bisexual man (as he does have a relationship with a woman a decade long in canon and i'm not opposed to it in the context of the story) but him still interacting with charles as a man would still be pretty validating to charles. because, i imagine in first class, charles would still be welcome to float around the periphery of erik's thoughts (as erik wasn't opposed to charles' mutation as most people try to say he is—as far as i remember, erik lets charles into his head during first class multiple times without becoming angry!) and charles would see (at least on the surface level) that erik's attraction to him isn't because he sees him as a woman but moreso that despite being attracted to both men and women he still respects charles' identity as a man and builds a relationship in that context.

i have more thoughts about this that i'll probably add to later but this is just a summary of a conversation i had with someone in my discord server that i thought had enough substance to make into a proper post. thanks for reading!

[tirfpikachu]

you are not "detrans" you are cis

i'm definitely what you'd call cis too! though cis/bio womanhood is not at all what most tras assume it's like. especially detrans cis/bio womanhood. and for me, the label detrans helped me find others like me. it kept me from hating my own guts. it helped me find a community of ppl who actually understand what i've been through and don't think i'm a freak.

living as trans for 13 years changed what mainstream tras would call my gender identity forever. it also is a way for me to find people who also went thru what i went thru. i get a lot of DMs from other detrans women and detrans men who lived as trans or even transitioned partially/fully like me (i was on testosterone for a bit and have an awkward bit of annoying af stubble T_T gotta get expensive laser for that... it can be isolating!). to me, i will never again be a fully cis woman. i will forever be affected with having struggled with intense dysphoria for 13+ years. i also feel like my cis womanhood in general has forever been changed with me having rejected it and then finding it again - it does NOT feel the same way as my girlhood did. in girlhood, i didn't give a shit what people thought girls or boys needed to do. doubly so because i was autistic. then puberty came, and the usual teenage girl and/or afab experience of needing to conform to cispatriarchal expectations came, and i freaked the fuck out about my boobs, about how boys were suddenly treating me and the things my shitty female relatives told me were "becoming a woman" (all very conservative notions of womanhood) and it grossed me out so badly, on top of grappling with being into other afab people, and i just totally distanced myself from girlhood at all. i gave up on making my own scrungly, gender nonconforming version of girlhood. girlhood felt like it had no room for people like me.

and so i kicked it out of my mind. i obsessed over becoming a boy. some trans boys, ofc, become happily trans men. for me, though, it personally was an escape. i was trans-identified for all the wrong reasons and it really fucked me up. it made my internalized lesbophobia so much worse, to the point where i even started identifying as pansexual/bisexual (PREPOSTEROUS thing for me since i had never ever in my entire life been attracted to a man or someone living as male in society... but i was into non-transitioned transmasc people, so i thought i couldn't possibly be lesbian!). for me, the trans identity was a bandaid, it was a crutch in the worst possible way. detrans people aren't trying to make trans people look bad. we're not trying to convert y'all, we don't give a shit. we're too busy grappling with our newfound connection to cis womanhood/cis manhood and dealing with transition-related issues.

we NEED to find fellow detrans folks or we'll go batshit crazy with shame at having made a mistake, guilt at being weaponized without our consent against the trans community, and just fucking hating how hrt/surgeries affected our bodies and trying to come to terms with that and learning to love our bodies as they are despite it all.

detrans cis womanhood will never be normie cis womanhood.

detrans cis manhood will never be normie detrans manhood.

living as trans for years affects you DEEPLY. trans people should know this first-hand. detrans folks, simply by starting to live as cis / bio men/women again, cannot suddenly erase all those years as if they never existed. we just can't. i'm sorry. i tried. dear goddess i really fucking tried harder than you'll ever know. and so did so many of my detrans friends and my darling detrans girlfriend.

but detrans people need other detrans people.

mainstream tras don't understand us.

cis/bio radfems who aren't detrans often misrepresent us.

we need eachother.

and our voices NEED to be heard too.

both radfems AND mainstream tras don't get it.

detrans & desisted folks NEED sisterhood & siblinghood.

only detrans women understand other detrans women.

only detrans men understand other detrans men.

i will always be seeking out lost detrans sisters. and i will always want to hear out my detrans brothers. i love my detrans/desisted community. we've been through really hard shit, we're more likely to be gay, more likely to be traumatized, more likely to be autistic. we're not what you think. and now you need to sit down and hear our stories. sorry. it has to happen. or feel free to block all detrans voices and plug your ears and go lalala! and now i'm not talking to you specifically anon, i don't want to put assumptions in your little mouth. but i'm talking to ALL mainstream trans activists, anti-radfems especially, who assume the very worst of us from the get-go. those who want detrans & desisted people to pretend we were always cis and normies who should pretend to not be deeply affected by our real lived detrans/desisted experiences. we will not shut up. we refuse to. both radblr and normie leftblr misrepresent us.

our voices matter. or, at the very least, we deserve to put detrans/desisted in our bios so we can find one another. shoutout to my detrans & desisted siblings!!! i love you!!!! <33

[yanderes-galore]

@an-ambiavalent prompts 12, 19, and 25 with Louis from Beastars, please?

Louis forces his Darling to join the Shishigumi as his partner and is forced to tag along with his plans and comments. It all leads to an argument where the Darling confesses that they hate the life he forced them into because of his selfishness. Louis however makes a point to explain to his Darling that he will always have the final say and that they belong to him, does he really have to remind them of that fact again?

Prompts Here

Sure, here you go! I hope you enjoy it :) I always have no idea if I got him OOC or not....

Yandere! Louis Prompts 12, 19, 25

"I’m only this desperate for you."

"Your happiness, your tears, your love, your hate – all of it belongs to me."

"You shouldn’t have tested my limits."

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Manipulation, Possessive behavior, Toxic relationship, Controlling behavior, Blood, Violence, Murder/Death, Trauma, Kidnapping, There's some physical scenes but he doesn't hit you, Forced relationship.

Two herbivores in a lion's den.

That's how you felt about joining the Shishigumi. You never liked the idea, being an herbivore roaming the black market.... Yet Louis, your boyfriend, insisted you be under his care.

You had begun dating Cherryton's star student months ago. You always found him charming, attractive... and the feeling was mutual. However...

You didn't expect him to drag you into a gang he commandeered....

Louis became much more... controlling after that. Around lions, carnivores, Louis felt he needed to show he was in charge to everyone. He needed to show he was strong and powerful. Which unfortunately led to you two having arguments.

For a while, because you loved Louis, you tolerated it. You put up with his orders and lived in the shadows because you cared. Even as an herbivore, you felt you could handle it because he could.

Then you saw the horrors in the black market.

Everything from herbivore meat to drugs made from carnivores... you've never seen so much blood. Even Ibuki, Louis' right hand lion, became concerned about your mental health. However... Ibuki was not in the position to tell Louis what to do with you.

Nowadays you feel Louis has changed since you two began dating. Ever since he joined the Shishigumi and soon dragged you into it... he wasn't the same animal. No... He can't be if he keeps ignoring you and your feelings.

Arguments grew more and more common between you and Louis. They often start due to the stress you're put through. Like when you have to watch people be shot... or see blood splatter on the floor....

This is not the life you deserve.

But once again... Louis doesn't seem to care.

Another argument occurs as you sit with Louis in his office. He's looking over something at his desk, looking oddly calm. It disturbs you... just like everything else here. From the lions to the meat and blood.

"Just let me leave." You plead suddenly, hoping to convince your fellow herbivore partner to be reasonable.

"No." Louis snarls. "You're meant to be here with me. You're under my protection here."

"Captivity." You correct, causing Louis' eye to twitch. "You're keeping me here. You dragged me here... and for what!?"

"I’m only this desperate for you!" Louis snaps, standing from his desk harshly. You jump back a bit but still glare. "Must we always have this conversation? Must I always remind you, sweetheart?"

"You're more than just desperate." You scoff, standing up. "You're selfish. This is not the deer I fell in love with. You've changed. Can't you see that? Can't you see it's wrong to keep me here?"

"Selfish?" Louis scoffs with a laugh. "Selfish, huh? You think I'm selfish...?"

Louis then comes closer, staring you down. Even now he's an herbivore obsessed with trying to be a predator. Trying to intimidate you into staying with him... much more than genuinely getting you to love him again.

"Maybe I am selfish..." Louis hums with an irritated grin. "Maybe it is selfish to make you love me... to force you beside me... to be in control... but I don't care anymore."

You yelp when he grabs your shirt. It's subtle but you can tell he doesn't want to harm you. He just wants you to focus on him... or he just wants to prevent you from running while he proves his point....

"Your happiness, your tears, your love, your hate – all of it belongs to me." Louis growls, watching as you squirm. "Call it selfish if you want... but I prefer to call it love. I love you... and this is my way of protecting you. I have power here... no matter the means...."

"Love?" You try to pull away, yet Louis doesn't relent. "Louis... I used to love you... but now? I just want to leave... I want to continue my life... I just want you to let me go...."

The deer then pauses, hesitating. It's enough time for you to pull away and back off. Louis looks... lost for a moment. His amber eyes staring at you as he slowly puts his hand down.

Then you see his teeth clench.

"Don't you dare walk out that damn door..." Louis warns, seeing you place a hand around the door knob.

"Don't act like you own me...." You growl, opening the door as Louis stares at you with irritation...

Yet you're then greeted by two lions.

Lions who were seemingly on stand by.

"Bring them back to me." Louis orders coldly, going back to sit on his desk as he watches his two subordinates drag you back and place you on the couch. Louis glances at your fearful expression before clicking his tongue. "Tie their hands and feet, too."

A brief look of pity is given to you by the two lions... but they listen anyways.

You scream and buck as the two lions listen to their leader, restraining you before Louis hums in approval. Louis then gives a wordless command to dismiss them. The lions nod, casting you a glance of concern before leaving the room. The moment the door locks, it's just you and Louis alone in the silence.

"You shouldn’t have tested my limits." Louis sighs, still reigning in his frustration. "Never say such things... You do love me."

"I don't." You remain defiant as Louis heaves a disappointed sigh.

"Fine... Maybe you just need to be reminded that you and I belong together..." Louis threatens, moving off his desk to stand in front of you.

"You aren't leaving this room..." Louis warns, glaring at you as he tilts your chin up to lock eyes with him.

"Not until you learn your place by my side... and we can stop having these irritating conversations."

[sparkyskid]

Gale Dekarios The Wizard of Waterdeep ace-spec propaganda

Spoilers for Gale’s romance below the cut

I, an Aroace, have finished BG3 having romanced Gale and taken the route to “fix him” (I.e. encourage him that he is enough as he is and doesn’t need godly power, that his value does not depend on his power or talents or usefulness to others.)

Yes you make out a little in his romance scenes. Yes he says that he has been intimate with mortals before Mystra, and was Mystra’s lover.

BUT.

It is never stated that you have sex with him.

At most, it is implied that you are physically intimate in some way, primarily the post-game where he asks you to marry him, you wake up together and you can beckon him to come back to bed.

Even then, even when it is implied, Gale’s romance is entirely chaste. For a game so horny, a game so ready to let you fuck so many people, a game that gives you power to make your party hang out at camp in their underwear or even naked…

Astarion and Shadowheart definitely have topless/nude scenes. Karlach and La’zell express sexual attraction. Wyll is entirely unknown to me. But Gale, despite being very upfront about his feelings in some key moments, does not have a nude or partially nude cutscene. A game that loves showing or describing the sex you have with NPCs, and Gale has none of it.

Furthermore, the moment that stands out the most as possibly showing sexual attraction, in Act 2 when he comments about reading a book that links the rush of battle with desires for other “stimulation”. He is having such thoughts, but even as he says he wants Tav, it seems to be about pleasure and stimulation more than flat out sexual attraction.

As we all know, willingness to engage in sex and the experience of sexual attraction are different. Gale expresses a very ace or demi sort of relationship with sex- for him, it’s about pleasurable stimulation with a beloved person.

Take this in contrast with Halsin. In my game, Halsin came onto my Tav in the last night before the final battle. He spoke of natural desires, of wanting skin on skin etc. similar to how La’zell expresses a desire for Tav’s body in Act 1 or Karlach “ride you till you see stars”. Halsin, La’zell, and Karlach, all clearly express sexual attraction. Astarion is, well, Astarion. I don’t know Wyll very well, but his first romance scene is a dance and he gets such puppy eyes when you reject him. There is none of these things in Gale’s route.

One last thing, the compliments Gale gives. Yes, this is a difficult thing to write because the appearance of Tav can vary wildly. But his compliments are centered around aesthetic attraction, not physical. “Beautiful” is one of his most common ones. Non-specific, wholistic, and aesthetic. It would be hard to write anything more specific with the Tav’s appearance being so variable. But the other NPCs still have doubtless sexual attraction.

So Gale is a romantic, so what? He could also be a “wait until marriage type”? False. He has not been married, but (at least implies that) he has had sex before.

But it could just be that his route is supposed to be the most romantic, and not all of the NPCs need to have equal levels of horny? Yes. Not all of the NPCs should be the same amount of horny. And the least horny, if they are this different, will always come across as ace-spec or aro-spec, if only by comparison (as it is in the real world).

Consider another detail as well: how the people closest to him are expected to react to him finding a relationship.

Both his BFF Tara and his mother apparently want him to get in a relationship. Tara is obvious, Gale speaks of Tara encouraging him to have more mortal friends after his relationship with Mystra ends. And Tara does at one point comment on Gale finding a mortal partner in-game. Later when Gale asks Tav to marry him, if you accept, he remarks how his mother will also be very pleased to hear the news.

This is a theme in his life. People pressuring him to find a relationship. This is also a very commonly shared experience for a-spec people of all kinds. Pressure from others to find someone. (The most toxic variation being “you haven’t met the right person yet”)

My own mother would be overjoyed if she heard I found someone to get married to, even though she knows I don’t want that. Sure, many parents are this way about their allo children as well, but that’s hardly talked about. Parents of a-spec people, whose children “finally get married” or “finally find someone” are specially invested in the outcome. Of course anyone’s supportive parent would be happy if their child got married to somebody they loved. But it’s noteworthy here, for some reason. As if his mother has, in the past, also given him some grief about it in a way that Tara does as well. If she hadn’t, why mention her at all?

Gale being pressured by those closest to him to get a relationship is thematically similar to the way ace-spec (and aro-spec) people get pressured by those closest to them. And the relationship he crafts is one based not on physical attraction, but on aesthetic attraction and romantic attraction. Gale shares physical forms of affection with his partners for the pleasurable stimulation of it. He does not exhibit the same lust or sexual attraction that the rest of the romanceable/fuckable NPCs do. All this to say that Gale is consistently sex-favorable, but does not experience sexual attraction in the same (allo) way that everyone else does. Therefore, he falls on the ace spectrum. Most likely ace or demi.

[girlboyburger]

today i realized i could draw anything i want, so.

i drew myself a girlfriend

[lastoneout]

I do agree with the people calling Somerton out for his misogyny and lesbophobia but I do want to remind everyone that him treating Becky Albertalli like that was an explicit act of biphobia. Like there is something very transparent about him insisting that lesbians have it easier than gay men only to turn to a bisexual woman and refuse to accept that she's queer at all. That was biphobia in it's purest form. It doesn't make the rest okay by any means and I'm not trying to minimize it, but as a bisexual woman I think it's important for everyone to recognize that he did not just treat her like that because she's a woman who happens to like women, he did that because she's bisexual and he clearly doesn't think bisexual women are queer at all.

Also don't gloss over the transphobia around ignoring ND Stephenson and Rebecca Sugar's gender identities as well. He's not just a misogynist and a lesbophobe, he's biphobic and transphobic too. Acknowledge all of it.

[tiny-huts]

I am in complete agreement with the Astarion is (and all the other companions are) pan crowd. He is canonically pan and that should not be erased. But every post about it really needs to have at least one comment devaluing his attraction to men and denying the fact that he seems to have a preference for men (which is accurate to the lived experiences of bi/pan people. MANY people have a preference). Also many people need to realize that most people are not upset that you are having Astarion kissing your lady Tav but that most people are upset that many (not all) astarion x f!Tav works completely erase his more feminine mannerisms and stuff him into a tasteless hetero male love interest box which is like djddjjdjd not great and I do not trust it

[marzipanandminutiae]

Stay out of the gay tag woman

I. Am gay? Posting gay content? And tagging the gay content made by a gay woman, "gay?"

...real question: do you think the term Gay is just for men?

[disventure-rewrite-takes]

i would have put more emphasis on lakes sexuality in her original season. We only know she’s a lesbian because of a pride post. It would have been cool to see her talking about it with Rosa maria or maggy. About how she doesn’t want to get married to this guy because she isn’t attracted to men, but doesn’t have the words to describe it. Maybe Rosa and maggy help her realize that being same sex attracted is normal and nothing wrong with it. (Maggy autocorrected to maggot like 4 times wtf)

fr like i think besides jaiden, season 2 had no mention/hint of queerness and then BAM half the cast shows up in the pride post. uhhh thanks for the half-assed representation from unbearable/boring characters that we will never see again i guess! you’re so progressive ONC!

[dribs-and-drabbles]

What is the thing from your past (behaviour, thought, etc), after having had your sexuality Oh moment, that you look back on and go 'oh yeah, I should have known' 🤦🏽‍♀️?

[bisexualseraphim]

Alright fine I’m gonna speak my mind.

My cis followers, listen up:

Being attracted to trans people is not inherently a fetish. The way you speak about trans people CAN be fetishistic, but 99% of the time when I see cis people calling out trans fetishism it’s literally just. Someone being really horny for a trans person. That’s not inherently fetishistic.

Sorry but it actually hurts me a little when I see cis people claim that a content creator is being fetishistic for drawing a trans guy with tits and a pussy, or for writing smut where a trans guy really enjoys using his pussy for sex, or God forbid said trans guy is fem. Trans people like that exist, you know. I myself have a pussy and fuck yes do I want people I’m in a relationship with to be attracted to it. And the same goes for many transfemmes who keep their natal parts, especially butch transfemmes.

Trans people are not a monolith. We don’t all hate our bodies or experience dysphoria or express our genders the same way. I swear to God cis people are all “allies” until a trans man is fem or a trans woman is butch or an enby isn’t androgynous or we actually enjoy our bodies or we have a kink or sexual fetish you don’t like.

Cis people: I know your hearts are in the right place and I appreciate that, but spouting “oh this content is fetishistic and Bad because trans men NEVER like their vaginas and are NEVER feminine” (or something equal to other trans people) is seriously not the allyship you think it is.

There is absolutely a conversation to be had about fetishising trans people — chasers in particular — but it’s quite a bit less black and white than hating certain FICTIONAL portrayals of trans people because these types of trans people exist in real life and we can see what you say about us.

I love my dick and my pussy (because I have both — are you aware we can have both?) but I saw a post today by someone I really like that actually made me feel kind of shit about myself because it was a cis person essentially saying that smut that describes my genitals in any particularly horny light is fetishistic and that really kind of hurt me. It made me feel like people think I’m undesirable due to my body only it was said in some backwards attempt to be an ally which is almost worse than deliberate transphobia lol.

I guess my point is: not all trans people’s feelings and experiences are universal. Call out obvious transphobia when you see it, yes, but please stop speaking for us about complex situations you just can’t fully understand unless you’re trans. Trans identities and experiences can be so much more complicated than what mainstream celebrities and articles will tell you and I just really need cis people to stop behaving as though the issues we face are a quick and easy fix. It never is. Sometimes the best allyship is to listen to how WE feel and take it into consideration instead of saying whatever you think we want you to say — because a lot of the time, we don’t.

[yourgamemasterthewhiterabbit]

Of my 2% capacity to be attracted to anyone, my type is like 90% women, 5% pretty men and 5% men you would swear are super fucking manly, and never questioned being straight and cis, but are now suddenly *stressed* that they can't figure out why their attraction to me [fully socially interpreted as a woman and labelled that way up until relatively recently] feels incredibly fucking gay

[saym0-0]

hello jmart is t4t martin is no op jon is post top surgery. just letting u know. they told me themselves.

[heartscrypt]

i get so mad when ppl say riddle would be ignorant/clueless towards lgbtq+ stuff bc he was raised sheltered. no the fuck he wouldn't. maybe he'd start out that way yeah but as Soon as its implied he doesn't know something hes taking that shit to heart and learning everything he could EVER know about it. hes making a fucking study of it. he knows more than you actually

[rainbowtvz]

*grits teeth*

i do not want to discourse here or anywhere anymore but it does kind of affect me as a transmasc bi person when i see shit that indirectly misgenders me and implies that bisexuality is an icky no good word and identity and you have to be bi and gay and bi and lesbian and bi and straight at the same time or support them or you're an evil stinky stinky terf like... hello where am, i